Anonymous

<mediawiki xmlns="http://www.mediawiki.org/xml/export-0.11/" xmlns:xsi="http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema-instance" xsi:schemaLocation="http://www.mediawiki.org/xml/export-0.11/ http://www.mediawiki.org/xml/export-0.11.xsd" version="0.11" xml:lang="en">
  <siteinfo>
    <sitename>Wikiquote</sitename>
    <dbname>enwikiquote</dbname>
    <base>https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Main_Page</base>
    <generator>MediaWiki 1.47.0-wmf.11</generator>
    <case>first-letter</case>
    <namespaces>
      <namespace key="-2" case="first-letter">Media</namespace>
      <namespace key="-1" case="first-letter">Special</namespace>
      <namespace key="0" case="first-letter" />
      <namespace key="1" case="first-letter">Talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="2" case="first-letter">User</namespace>
      <namespace key="3" case="first-letter">User talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="4" case="first-letter">Wikiquote</namespace>
      <namespace key="5" case="first-letter">Wikiquote talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="6" case="first-letter">File</namespace>
      <namespace key="7" case="first-letter">File talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="8" case="first-letter">MediaWiki</namespace>
      <namespace key="9" case="first-letter">MediaWiki talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="10" case="first-letter">Template</namespace>
      <namespace key="11" case="first-letter">Template talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="12" case="first-letter">Help</namespace>
      <namespace key="13" case="first-letter">Help talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="14" case="first-letter">Category</namespace>
      <namespace key="15" case="first-letter">Category talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="118" case="first-letter">Draft</namespace>
      <namespace key="119" case="first-letter">Draft talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="710" case="first-letter">TimedText</namespace>
      <namespace key="711" case="first-letter">TimedText talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="828" case="first-letter">Module</namespace>
      <namespace key="829" case="first-letter">Module talk</namespace>
      <namespace key="1728" case="first-letter">Event</namespace>
      <namespace key="1729" case="first-letter">Event talk</namespace>
    </namespaces>
  </siteinfo>
  <page>
    <title>Anonymous</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>74</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965276</id>
      <parentid>3963176</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:46:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ficaia</username>
        <id>3085955</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Old English */</comment>
      <origin>3965276</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="37348" sha1="10chfvithwcupoil1c459tp52apxziw" xml:space="preserve">{{Distinguish|Anonymity|Anonymous (group)}}
[[File:Albert-L-Pollins-1.jpg|thumb|''[[Illegitimi non carborundum]]'' is a famous anonymous saying]]
'''[[w:Anonymous|Anonymous]]''' is the adjective form of [[anonymity]] derived from the [[w:Koine Greek|Greek]] word '''ἀνωνυμία''', ''anonymia'', meaning &quot;without a [[name]]&quot; or &quot;namelessness.&quot; It commonly refers to the state of an individual's personal identity, or personally identifiable information, being publicly unknown, intentionally or unintentionally. This article is for famous or notable quotes whose author is unknown.

== Quotes ==

=== English ===

==== Old English ====
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Beowulf]]'''''
::'''''[[Anglo-Saxon Chronicle]]'''''
::'''''[[The Battle of Maldon]]'''''
::'''''[[The Ruin]]'''''
::'''''[[The Seafarer (poem)|The Seafarer]]'''''
::'''''[[The Wanderer (poem)|The Wanderer]]'''''
::'''''[[Maxims (Old English poems)|Maxims]]'''''
::'''''[[The Durham Proverbs|Durham Proverbs]]'''''

==== Middle English ====
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Cursor Mundi]]'''''
::'''''[[Everyman (play)|Everyman]]'''''
::'''''[[The Babees Book]]'''''
::'''''[[The Cloud of Unknowing]]'''''

* ''Blow, northerne wynd,&lt;br&gt;Sent thou me my suetyng!&lt;br&gt;Blow, northerne wynd,&lt;br&gt;Blou! Blou! Blou!''
** Harley MS. 2253 ([[Harley Lyrics]], art. 46; ed. Susanna Fein, 2015) 

* ''Bothe lered and lewed, olde and yonge, &lt;br&gt; Alle understonden English tonge.''
** ''{{w|Speculum Vitae}}'' ('Mirror of Life'; late 14th cent.) l. 77

* ''Evyl weed ys sone y growe.''
** [[w:Harleian Library|Harley MS]]. 1490; reported in ''Hoyt's'' (1922) p. 867

* ''For I muste to the grene wode goo, alone a bannysshed man.''
** For I must to the green-wood go, &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; Alone, a banished man.	
** &quot;The Nut-Brown Maid&quot; (1502), st. 5, [[w:Oxford Book of English Verse|''OBEV'']] (1939)

* ''For in my mynde, of all mankynde I loue but you allon.''
** For, in my mind, of all mankind &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; I love but you alone.	
** &quot;[[w:The Nut-Brown Maid|The Nut-Brown Maid]]&quot; (1502), st. 4, ''OBEV'' (1939)

* ''Foweles in the frith,&lt;br&gt;The fisses in the flod,&lt;br&gt;And I mon waxe wod;&lt;br&gt;Mulch sorwe I walke with&lt;br&gt;For best of bon and blod.''
** &quot;[[w:Foweles in the frith|Fowels in the Frith]]&quot; (13th cent.), E. K. Chambers and F. Sidgwick (eds.) ''Early English Lyrics, Amorous, Divine, Moral and Trivial'' (&lt;!--London: A. H. Bullen, --&gt;1907) p. 5 &lt;!-- MS. Douce 139, f.5r --&gt;

* ''Ich am of Irlaunde,&lt;br&gt;Ant of the holy londe&lt;br&gt;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;Of Irlande.&lt;br&gt;Gode sire, pray ich the,&lt;br&gt;For of saynte charité,&lt;br&gt;Come ant daunce wyth me&lt;br&gt;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;In Irlaunde.''
** &quot;[[w:Ich am of Irlaunde|The Irish Dancer]]&quot; (14th cent.), ''OBEV'' (1939)

* ''I wold not be in a folis paradyce.'' 
** I would not be in a fool's paradise.
** ''[[Paston Letters]]'', no. 562 (July 1462) ed. James Gairdner (1904) vol. 4

* ''Lever me were to lete mi liif,&lt;br&gt;Than thus to lese the quen mi wiif!''
** ''{{w|Sir Orfeo}}'' (early 14th cent.) l. 177, Kenneth Sisam (ed.) ''Fourteenth Century Verse and Prose'' (1921) p. 19

* ''O little booke, thou art so unconning, &lt;br&gt; How darst thou put thy-self in prees for drede?''
** ''[[w:The Floure and the Leafe|The Floure and the Leafe]]'' (c. 1470) l. 59. Formerly attributed to [[Chaucer]]

* ''Perle, pleasaunte to prynces paye&lt;br&gt;To clanly clos in golde so clere,&lt;br&gt;Oute of [[W:Orient|oryent]], I hardyly saye,&lt;br&gt;Ne proued I neuer her precios pere.''
** [[w:Pearl (poem)|''Pearl'']] (late 14th cent.) opening lines

* ''&quot;Say me, viit in the brom,&lt;br&gt;Teche me wou I sule don&lt;br&gt;That min hosebonde&lt;br&gt;Me lovien wolde.&quot;{{pb}}&quot;Hold thine tunke stille&lt;br&gt;And haw al thine wille.&quot;''
** &quot;Say Me, Wight in the Broom&quot; (c. 1300), Carleton Brown (ed.) ''English Lyrics of the XIIIth Century'' (1932) no. 21, p. 32 &lt;!-- T.C.C. MS. 323, f.28r. Cf. B.M. Addit. MS. 11579, f.29r --&gt;

* ''Sumer is icumen in,&lt;br&gt;Lhude sing cuccu!&lt;br&gt;Groweth sed, and bloweth med,&lt;br&gt;And springth the wude nu—&lt;br&gt;Sing cuccu!''
** &quot;{{w|Sumer is icumen in}}&quot; (13th cent.), ''OBEV'''' (1939)

* ''Were beth they biforen us weren,&lt;br&gt;Houndës ladden and hauekës beren,&lt;br&gt;And hadden feld and wodë?&lt;br&gt;The richë levedies in hoerë bour,&lt;br&gt;That wereden gold in hoerë tressour,&lt;br&gt;With hoerë brighttë rodë;{{pb}}Eten and drounken, and maden hem glad;&lt;br&gt;Hoere lif was al with gamen i-lad,&lt;br&gt;Men kneleden hem biforen;&lt;br&gt;They beren hem wel swithë heyë;&lt;br&gt;And in a twincling of an eyë&lt;br&gt;Hoere soulës weren forloren.''
** &quot;Ubi sunt qui ante nos fuerunt?&quot; (c. 1300), Carl Horstmann and F. J. Furnivall (eds.) ''The Minor Poems of the Vernon MS.'' (1901) vol. 2, p. 761 &lt;!-- MS. Digby 86, f.126v—27r --&gt;

* ''Westron wynde when wyll thow blow&lt;br&gt;The smalle rayne downe can rayne&lt;br&gt;Cryst yf my love were in my armys&lt;br&gt;And I yn my bed agayne.''
** O western wind, when wilt thou blow &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; That the small rain down can rain? &lt;br&gt; Christ, that my love were in my arms &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; And I in my bed again!
** &quot;[[w:Westron Wynde|The Lover in Winter Plaineth for the Spring]]&quot; (c. 1500), ''OBEV'' (1939)

==== Early Modern English ====
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Border ballads]]'''''

* A crafty knave needs no broker.
** ''[[A Knack to Know a Knave|A Merry Knack to Know a Knave]]'' (ed. 1594) p. 33 (Honesty)

* A heavy purse makes a light heart.
** ''Wily Beguiled'' (c. 1602) l. 1
**:&lt;small&gt;Cf. Ben Jonson, ''The New Inn'', act 1, sc. 1 (Host)&lt;/small&gt;

* A right woman — either love like an angel, &lt;br&gt; Or hate like a devil — in extremes to dwell.
** ''The Rare Triumphs of Love and Fortune'' (1589) act 1 (Penulo)

* And let all women strive to be &lt;br&gt; As constant as Penelope.
** ''A Looking-glass for Ladies, or A Mirrour for Married Women'' (c. 1674-79) st. 18, last lines &lt;!-- Also in Percy's ''Reliques'' --&gt;

* Any food, any feeding,&lt;br&gt;Feeding, drink, or clothing;&lt;br&gt;Come dame or maid, be not afraid,&lt;br&gt;Poor Tom will injure nothing.
** &quot;[[w:Tom o' Bedlam|Tom o' Bedlam]]&quot; (c. 1615) refrain

* April is in my mistress' face, &lt;br&gt; And July in her eyes hath place; &lt;br&gt; Within her bosom is September, &lt;br&gt; But in her heart a cold December.
** &quot;April Is in My Mistress' Face&quot;, in Thomas Morley, ''Madrigals to Four Voices'' (1594) &lt;!-- Cf. Robert Greene, ''Perimedes the Blacksmith'' (1588): &quot;Fair is my love for April’s in her face.&quot; --&gt;

* Break her betimes, and bring her under by force,&lt;br&gt;Or else the grey mare will be the better horse.
** ''The Marriage of Wit and Science'' (1569–70) act 2, sc. 1 (Will)

* But he that takes not such time, while he may,&lt;br&gt;Shall leap at a whiting, when time is away.
** ''The Marriage of Wit and Science'' (1569–70) act 4, sc. 1 (Will)

* Eternal vigilance is the price we pay for liberty.
** Earliest known publication in the (Bennington) ''Vermont Gazette'' (8 July 1817) p. 2. Later misattributed to [[Thomas Jefferson]]. Reported in Anna Berkes, [https://www.monticello.org/encyclopedia/eternal-vigilance-price-liberty-spurious-quota &quot;Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty (Spurious Quotation)&quot;], monticello.org (11 August 2010)

* For he that leaps, before he look, good son,&lt;br&gt;May leap in the mire, and miss what he hath done.
** ''The Marriage of Wit and Science'' (1569–70) act 4, sc. 1 (Wit)

* From the hag and hungry goblin&lt;br&gt;That into rags would rend ye,&lt;br&gt;The spirit that stands by the naked man&lt;br&gt;In the Book of Moons defend ye.
** &quot;Tom o' Bedlam&quot; (c. 1615) st. 1

* God be in my head,&lt;br&gt;And in my understanding,{{pb}}God be in my eyes,&lt;br&gt;And in my looking,{{pb}}God be in my mouth,&lt;br&gt;And in my speaking,{{pb}}God be in my heart,&lt;br&gt;And in my thinking,{{pb}}God be at my end,&lt;br&gt;And at my departing.
** ''Sarum Primer'' (1558)

* Greensleeves was all my joy,&lt;br&gt;Greensleeves was my delight:&lt;br&gt;Greensleeves was my heart of gold,&lt;br&gt;And who but my lady Greensleeves.
** &quot;[[w:Greensleeves|Greensleeves]]&quot;, refrain, in ''A Handful of Pleasant Delights'' (1584; [[s:A Handful of Pleasant Delights/A new Courtly Sonet, of the Lady Greensleeves|ed.]] Edward Arber, 1878)

* Ground me no grounds.
** ''The Marriage of Wit and Science'' (1569–70) act 2, sc. 1 (Will)
**:&lt;small&gt;Cf. [[John Redford]], ''The Play of Wit and Science''&lt;/small&gt;

* He is but a fool that, when all fails, cannot live upon his wit.
** ''A Merry Knack to Know a Knave'' (ed. 1594) p. 32 (Coneycatcher)

* He's best at ease that meddleth least.
** ''[[Fair Em]]'' (1590s) act 3, sc. 17, l. 1383 (Manville)&lt;!--As cited in P. H. Dalbiac (ed.) ''Dictionary Of Quotations: English'' (1896) pp. 98, 154--&gt;

* I had need of a long spoon, now I go to eat with the devil.
** ''[[Grim the Collier of Croydon|Grim, the Collier of Croydon]]'' (1662) act 5, sc. 1 (Grim)

* I know more than Apollo,&lt;br&gt;For oft, when he lies sleeping&lt;br&gt;I see the stars at bloody wars&lt;br&gt;In the wounded welkin weeping.
** &quot;Tom o' Bedlam&quot; (c. 1615) st. 6

* (I would topple with ye &lt;br&gt; And) pluck a good crow.
** ''The History of Jacob and Esau'' (c. 1558) act 2, sc. 2 (Ragan)&lt;!--As cited in P. H. Dalbiac (ed.) ''Dictionary Of Quotations: English'' (1896) p. 209--&gt;

* It's pride that puts this country down: &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; Man, take thy old cloak about thee!		
** &quot;The Old Cloak&quot;, st. 7, ''OBEV'' (1939)

* Kill then, and bliss me, &lt;br&gt; But first come, kiss me.
** &quot;Dainty Fine Sweet Nymph Delightful&quot;, in Thomas Morley, ''The First Book of Ballets to Five Voices'' (1595) &lt;!-- E. H. Fellowes (ed.) ''English Madrigal Verse 1588-1632'' (1820) p. 133 --&gt;

* King Stephen was a worthy peer; &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; His breeches cost him but a crown.
** &quot;The Old Cloak&quot;, st. 7, ''OBEV'' (1939)

* Love me little, love me long, &lt;br&gt; Is the burden of my song.
** &quot;Love Me Little, Love Me Long&quot; (1569–70) l. 1&lt;!-- Text from Charles Mackay (ed.) ''The Book of English Songs'' (1851) p. 22 --&gt;

* &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; Love, that covers multitude of sins, &lt;br&gt; Makes love in parents wink at children’s faults.
** ''Fair Em'' (1590s) act 3, sc. 17, l. 1270 (Zeveno)

* More haste than good speed makes many fare the worse.
** ''The Marriage of Wit and Science'' (1569–70) act 4, sc. 1 (Wit)

* No burial these&lt;!-- two--&gt; pretty babes &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; Of any man receives &lt;br&gt; Till Robin Redbreast painfully&lt;!--or 'piously'--&gt; &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; Did cover them with leaves.
** &quot;[[Babes in the Wood|Two Babes in the Wood]]&quot; (1595; [[s:Two babes in the wood, or, The Norfolk gentleman's last will and testament|ed.]] Glasgow: J. &amp; M. Robertson, 1802)

* The blinded boy that shootes so trim &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; From heaven downe did hie. &lt;!-- i.e. [[Cupid]] --&gt;
** &quot;[[w:The King and the Beggar-maid|King Cophetua and the Beggar-Maid]]&quot;, st. 2 ([[w:Internet Sacred Text Archive|ISTA]] [https://sacred-texts.com/neu/eng/boeb/boeb04.htm *])

* The devil cannot tie a woman's tongue.
** ''Grim, the Collier of Croydon'' (1662) act 2, sc. 1 (Castiliano)

* The gypsies, Snap and Pedro,&lt;br&gt;Are none of Tom's comradoes,&lt;br&gt;The punk I scorn and the cutpurse sworn,&lt;br&gt;And the roaring boy's bravadoes.&lt;br&gt;The meek, the white, the gentle&lt;br&gt;Me handle, touch, and spare not;&lt;br&gt;But those that cross Tom Rynosseros&lt;br&gt;Do what the panther dare not.
** &quot;Tom o' Bedlam&quot; (c. 1615) st. 7

* The moon's my constant mistress,&lt;br&gt;And the lowly owl my marrow;&lt;br&gt;The flaming drake and the night crow make&lt;br&gt;Me music to my sorrow.
** &quot;Tom o' Bedlam&quot; (c. 1615) st. 4

* The sound is honey, but the sense is gall.
** ''Soliman and Perseda'' (1592–93) act 4 (Soliman)

* &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; They are no more like, &lt;br&gt; Than chalk is to cheese.
** ''The Marriage of Wit and Science'' (1569–70) act 5, sc. 1 (Science)

* 'Tis an ill wind that blows no man to profit.
** ''A Merry Knack to Know a Knave'' (ed. 1594) p. 32 (Coneycatcher)

* Virtue is the shoeing-horn of justice.
** [[Parnassus plays|''The Return from Parnassus: or, The Scourge of Simony'']] (1606) act 4, sc. 3 (Kemp)

* What poor astronomers are they, &lt;br&gt; Take women’s eyes for stars!
** &quot;Song&quot;, in John Dowland, ''The Third Book of Songs or Airs'' (1603) &lt;!-- W. S. Braithwaite (ed.) ''The Book of Elizabethan Verse'' (1907) --&gt;

* Who blurs fair paper with foul bastard rhymes,&lt;br&gt;Shall live full many an age in latter times:&lt;br&gt;Who makes a ballad for an alehouse door,&lt;br&gt;Shall live in future times for evermore.
** ''The Return from Parnassus: or, The Scourge of Simony'' (1606) act 1, sc. 2 (Judicio)

* Why, what is Love but Fortune’s tennis-ball?
** ''Soliman and Perseda'' (1592–93) act 1 (Fortune)

* With a host of furious fancies&lt;br&gt;Whereof I am commander,&lt;br&gt;With a burning spear and a horse of air,&lt;br&gt;To the wilderness I wander.&lt;br&gt;By a knight of ghosts and shadows&lt;br&gt;I summoned am to tourney&lt;br&gt;Ten leagues beyond the wide world's end:&lt;br&gt;Methinks it is no journey.
** &quot;Tom o' Bedlam&quot; (c. 1615) st. 8

==== Modern English ====
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[English proverbs]]'''''
::'''''[[Junius|Letters of Junius]]'''''
::'''''[[The New England Primer|New England Primer]]'''''
::'''''[[Nursery rhymes]]'''''
::'''''[[Universal Declaration of Human Rights]]'''''

* A lie is an abomination unto the Lord, but a very present help in time of trouble.
** A &quot;school boy&quot;, quoted in [[w:The Living Church|''The Living Church'']] (2 September 1899) p. 394 &lt;!-- Misattributed to [[Desmond Tutu]] and [[Jomo Kenyatta]] --&gt;

* All that's fair must fade.
** &quot;The Emigrants&quot;, signed &quot;J. M.&quot;, in ''The Edinburgh Magazine and Literary Miscellany'', vol. 13 (Nov. 1823), p. 566

* Every animal is a dog if you try hard enough.
** In [https://www.newsweek.com/polar-bear-family-raft-1831932 &quot;Man Builds Water Raft for Polar Bear Family&quot;], ''Newsweek'' (4 Oct. 2023)

* Faster horses, older whiskey, younger women, and more money.
** Boast of the American West, attributed to railroad men who came to Texas in search of oil (late 19th or early 20th century); in Sally Helgesen, ''Wildcatters: A Story of Texans, Oil, and Money'' (1981) p. 29&lt;!-- Spanish translation in ''Il Piccolo di Trieste'' (11 May 1986) p. 3: &quot;''Cavalli più veloci, whisky più vecchio, ragazze più giovani. I tempi nuovi hanno aggiunto una quarta voce: più denaro.''&quot; --&gt;. Cf. [[Tom T. Hall]]

* From Ghoulies and Ghoosties, long-leggety Beasties, and Things that go Bump in the Night,&lt;br&gt;Good Lord, deliver us!
** &quot;Quaint Old Litany&quot;, in [[Alfred Noyes]], ''The Magic Casement'' (1908) p. viii

* If you can't do the time, don't do the crime.
** Quoted among the Extension of Remarks of Charles B. Rangel before the U.S. House of Representatives, 25 October 1973, in the ''Congressional Record'' (26 October 1973) p. 35189; also in [[Paul du Feu]], ''Let's Hear It for the Long-Legged Women'' (New York: G. P. Putnam's Sons, 1973) p. 65. Variant (&quot;you shouldn't&quot; instead of &quot;don't&quot;) quoted by Leo Aikman, &quot;You're Never Out of Reach&quot;, in ''The Atlanta Constitution'' (28 May 1957) p. 2

* In the year 1690, the same in which Ichabod Paddock was sent for from Cape Cod, ... some persons were on a high hill, afterwards called Folly House Hill, observing the whales spouting and sporting with each other, when one observed &quot;''there'',&quot; pointing to the sea, &quot;''is a green pasture where our children's grand-children will go for bread.''&quot;
** [[Obed Macy]], ''The History of Nantucket'' (Boston: Hilliard, Gray, and Co., 1835) p. 33 &lt;!-- Quoted in ''[[Moby-Dick]]'' (1851) Extracts (Supplied by a Sub-Sub-Librarian) --&gt;

* Keep a [[w:stiff upper lip|stiff upper lip]].
** ''New England Galaxy &amp; Masonic Magazine'', vol. 2, no. 89 (25 June 1819) p. 3, cols. 1–2
** See also: [[Phoebe Cary]]

* Love starts when you sink in his arms and ends with your arms in his sink.
** In ''The Shepherd College Picket'', [https://archive.org/details/picket1941-1943shepu/page/n189/mode/2up vol. 47] (November 9, 1943), p. 4

* [[w:May you live in interesting times|May you live in interesting times]].
** Quoted as a &quot;Chinese curse&quot;, in Hughe Knatchbull-Hugessen, ''Diplomat in Peace and War'' (John Murray, 1949) p. ix

* O Paddy dear, an’ did ye hear the news that’s goin’ round? &lt;br&gt; The shamrock is by law forbid to grow on Irish ground; &lt;br&gt; St. Patrick’s Day no more we’ll keep, his colour can’t be seen, &lt;br&gt; For there’s a cruel law agin the wearin’ o’ the Green.
** &quot;[[w:The Wearing of the Green|The Wearing of the Green]]&quot; (c. 1798) st. 1

* Old soldiers never die —&lt;br&gt;They simply&lt;!--or 'just', 'only'--&gt; fade away.
** &quot;[[w:Old soldiers never die|Old Soldiers Never Die]]&quot; (c. 1914–18) l. 4 &lt;!-- John Brophy and Eric Partridge, ''The Long Trail'' (1965) p. 59 --&gt;

[[File:Cruikshank - The Allied Bakers.png|thumb|Praise undeserv'd is [[satire]] in disguise. —Mr. Br----]]

* Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.
** In [[Daniel Dennett]], [[w:Breaking the Spell (Dennett book)|''Breaking the Spell'']] (US: Viking, 2006), p. 17&lt;!--{{ISBN|0-670-03472-X}}--&gt;

* Praise undeserv'd is [[satire]] in disguise.
** &quot;Epigram on a Certain Line of Mr. Br----, Author of a Copy of Verses, Call'd the British Beauties&quot;, in [[Lewis Theobald]] (ed.) ''The Grove; or, A Collection of Original Poems, Translations, &amp;c'' (1721), p. 294 [http://books.google.com/books?id=Y9kIAAAAQAAJ&amp;q=%22Praise%22+%22is+satire+in+disguise%22&amp;pg=PA294#v=onepage] [http://books.google.com/books?id=HnACAAAAQAAJ&amp;q=%22Praise+undeserv'd+is+scandal+in+disguise%22&amp;pg=PA118#v=onepage]

* Question everything; accept nothing without proof.
** In Elizabeth Janet Gray, [https://archive.org/details/anthologywithcom0000vini/page/38/mode/2up?q=%22Question+everything%2C+accept+nothing%22 ''Anthology with Comments''] (1942), p. 39&lt;!--Quoted by Ethan Skyler; used in 2002 in reference to Galileo, para. 9 [http://www.physicsnews1.com/article_9.html] ~ deadlink--&gt;

* Real [[Programming|programmers]] don't comment their code. If it was hard to write it should be hard to understand.
** Appeared in &quot;[[w:Real Programmers Don't Use Pascal|Real Programmers Don't Use Pascal]]&quot; (July 1983), but may or may not have been in existence beforehand

* Rebellion to tyrants [''or'' resistance to tyranny] is obedience to God. 
** Anglo-American maxim, variously attributed: see [[John Bradshaw (judge)|John Bradshaw]] and [[Simon Bradstreet]]

* Remember, remember! &lt;br&gt; The fifth of November, &lt;br&gt; The Gunpowder treason and plot; &lt;br&gt; I know of no reason &lt;br&gt; Why the Gunpowder treason &lt;br&gt; Should ever be forgot!
** &quot;[[w:Guy Fawkes Night|The Fifth of November]]&quot; (c. 1870), st. 1 (PotW.org [https://potw.org/archive/potw405.html *])

* Remember the Alamo!
** Common American war cry, invoking the [[w:Battle of the Alamo|Battle of the Alamo]] (6 March 1836)

* Send him victorious, &lt;br&gt; Happy and glorious, &lt;br&gt; Long to reign over us, &lt;br&gt; God save the king.
** &quot;[[w:God Save the King|A Song for Two Voices]]&quot; (1745) st. 1 &lt;!-- ''The Gentleman's Magazine'', vol. 15, no. 10 (October 1745) p. 552 --&gt;

* Some talk of Alexander, and some of Hercules; &lt;br&gt; Of Hector and Lysander, and such great names as these. &lt;br&gt; But of all the world's brave heroes, there's none that can compare, &lt;br&gt; With a tow, row row, row row, row row, to the British grenadier.
** &quot;[[w:The British Grenadiers|The British Grenadiers]]&quot; (c. 1750) st. 1 &lt;!--  J. C. Hutchieson (ed.)  ''Fugitive Poetry, 1600–1878'' (London: Frederick Warne and Co, 1878) --&gt;

* ''Te Deum Laudamus'' was up the Alcala sung:&lt;br&gt;Down from the Alhamra's minarets were all the crescents flung.
** &quot;The Flight from Granada&quot;, st. 1. Traditional ballad on the ''reconquista'' of [[w:Granada War|Granada]]. Translated by [[John Gibson Lockhart]], ''Ancient Spanish Ballads'' (Edinburgh: William Blackwood, 1823) p. 110 &lt;!-- &quot;There was crying in Granada when the sun was going down,/Some calling on the Trinity, some calling on Mahoun;/Here pass'd away the Koran, there in the Cross was borne,/And here was heard the Christian bell, and there the Moorish horn;//''Te Deum Laudamus'' was up the Alcala sung:/Down from the Alhamra's minarets were all the crescents flung;/The arms thereon of Arragon they with Castille's display;/One king comes in in triumph, one weeping goes away. --&gt;

* The '[[w:Almighty dollar|Almighty Dollar]]' is the only object of worship.
** In the Philadelphia [[w:Public Ledger (Philadelphia)|''Public Ledger'']] (2 December 1836); cited in ''Notes and Queries'', ser. 11, vol. 3 (11 Feb. 1911) p. 109

* The law locks up the man or woman&lt;br&gt;Who steals the goose from off the common;&lt;br&gt;But leaves the greater villain loose&lt;br&gt;Who steals the common from the goose.
** &quot;[[w:The Goose and the Common|The Goose and the Common]]&quot; (late 18th century), as quoted in [[Edward Potts Cheyney]], ''An Introduction to the Industrial and Social History of England'' (1901) ch. 8

* {{w|Scramble for Africa|The Scramble for Africa}} (''La Gribouillette pour Afrique'')
** European colonisation of Africa (1884–1916), used in ''Punch'' (20 Dec. 1884), p. 292, and in ''The Times'' (Nov. 1896)

* The two best days in a boat owner’s life are the day they buy a boat and the day they sell it.
** In [[Reuven Perlman]], [https://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/the-best-days-of-a-boat-owners-life &quot;The Best Days of a Boat Owner's Life&quot;], ''The New Yorker'' (13 Jan. 2021) &lt;!-- Cf. [[Pseudo-Hipponax]] --&gt;

* There are 'quips and quillets' which seem actual conundrums, but yet are none. Of such is this: '[[w:Why did the chicken cross the road?|Why does a chicken cross the street?]]' Are you 'out of town?' Do you 'give it up?' Well, then: 'Because it wants to get on the other side!'
** In [[w:The Knickerbocker|''The Knickerbocker'']] (1847) p. 283

* There is no God, and X is His Prophet.
** Applied to {{w|Harriet Martineau}}, Henry G. Atkinson, [[William M. Tweed]], [[Robert G. Ingersoll]], [[Karl Marx]], [[Paul Dirac]], and others. See: [https://quoteinvestigator.com/2017/01/20/prophet/ &quot;Quote Origin: There Is No God, and Harriet Martineau Is His Prophet&quot;], ''{{w|Quote Investigator}}'' (January 20, 2017)

* [[w:Think globally, act locally|Think globally, act locally]].
** Attributed variously: to [[David Brower]], [[René Dubos]], and others (1960s)

* Tho' lost to sight, to memory dear.
** Inscription on a civic arch, for the procession of Lafayette through Lynn, MA, August 1824. ''A Sketch of the Tour of General Lafayette, on his Late Visit to the United States'' (Portland, ME, 1824) p. 120

* To the glorious, pious and Immortal Memory of King William III, who saved us from Rogues and Roguery, Slaves and Slavery, Knaves and Knavery, Popes and Popery, from brass money and wooden shoes; and who ever denies this Toast may he be slammed, crammed and jammed into the muzzle of the great gun of Athlone, and the gun fired into the Pope's Belly, and the Pope into the Devil's Belly, and the Devil into Hell, and the door locked and the key in an Orangeman's pocket; and may we never lack a Brisk Protestant Boy to kick the arse of a papist; and here's a fart for the Bishop of Cork!
** Toast of the Orangemen in Ulster on the anniversary of the [[w:battle of the Boyne|battle of the Boyne]]. Arthur Bryant, ''The Age of Elegance, 1812–1822'' (1950), ch. 8, p. 267 note &lt;!-- See also: ''Romany Rye'', 16-17, 400; Austen, 238; Bamford, I, 102; Castlereagh, X, 378; De Selincourt, II, 578; Lady Shelley, I, 252-3, 287, 351-2; Stanley, 191; Wilberforce, II, 322 --&gt;

* What is mind?—No matter.&lt;br&gt;What is matter?—Never mind.&lt;br&gt;What is spirit?—That's ''quite immaterial''.
** In ''Harper's New Monthly Magazine'', vol. 10, no. 56 (January 1855) p. 275. Variation of the first two lines in ''Punch'', vol. 29, no. 19 (14 July 1855) p. 19: &quot;What is Matter? — Never mind. / What is Mind? — No matter.&quot; (&quot;A Short Cut to Metaphysics&quot;). See also: [[Thomas Hewitt Key|T. H. Key]]. Compare: Byron, [[Don Juan (Byron)#Canto XI (1823)|''Don Juan'']], canto 11, st. 1

* Whatever you have to [[Language|say]], my friend,&lt;br&gt;Whether witty or grave or gay,&lt;br&gt;Condense as much as ever you can,&lt;br&gt;And say it the readiest way;&lt;br&gt;And whether you write of rural affairs&lt;br&gt;Or of matter and things in town,&lt;br&gt;Just take a word of friendly advice—&lt;br&gt;Boil it down.
** &quot;Boil it Down&quot;, in the [[w:Winnipeg Free Press|''Manitoba Free Press'']] (June 5, 1875)

* {{w|When the going gets tough, the tough get going}}.
** Attributed to [[Joseph P. Kennedy Sr.]] in J. H. Cutler, ''Honey Fitz'' (1962), p. 291. Also attributed to [[Knute Rockne]], and others

* When the white man came to South Africa he had the Bible and we had the land. Today they have the land and we have the Bible.
** A member of the Gamma Sigma Club in Johannesburg, as quoted in ''The Missionary Herald'' (May 1921), p. 181

=== Scots ===

* ''Quod God to the Helandman, Quhair wilt thow now?&lt;br&gt;I will doun in the Lawland, Lord, and thair steill a kow.''
** Quoth God to the Highlander, &quot;What will you now?&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;I will down to the Lowland, Lord, and there steal a cow.&quot;
** &quot;[[w:How The First Helandman of God Was Maid|How The First Helandman of God Was Maid]]&quot;, fol. 163a (1898). Translated in Gordon Donaldson, ''Scotland: The Shaping of a Nation'' (Newton Abbot: David &amp; Charles, 1974) p. 155&lt;!-- ISBN 0 7153 6904 0 --&gt;. Compare: MacGregor, in [[Robert Lindsay of Pitscottie]]

=== French ===
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Aucassin and Nicolette|Aucassin et Nicolette]]'''''
::'''''[[The Song of Roland|La Chanson de Roland]]'''''
::'''''[[French proverbs]]'''''

* ''Au clair de la lune,&lt;br&gt;Mon ami Pierrot,&lt;br&gt;Prête-moi ta plume&lt;br&gt;Pour écrire un mot.&lt;br&gt;Ma chandelle est morte,&lt;br&gt;Je n'ai plus de feu.&lt;br&gt;Ouvre-moi ta porte&lt;br&gt;Pour l'amour de Dieu.''
** By the light of the moon,&lt;br&gt;My friend Pierrot,&lt;br&gt;Lend me your quill,&lt;br&gt;To write a word.&lt;br&gt;My candle is dead,&lt;br&gt;I have no more fire.&lt;br&gt;Open your door for me&lt;br&gt;For the love of God.
** &quot;[[w:Au clair de la lune|Au clair de la lune]]&quot;, st. 1 (18th cent.), in Henri Plon (ed.) ''Chants et Chansons populaires de la France'' (1858) pp. 16–17

* ''Bons fut li siecles al tens ancienor, &lt;br&gt; Quer feit i ert e justise et amor, &lt;br&gt; Si ert credance, dont or n'i at nul prot. &lt;br&gt; Toz est mudez, perdude at sa color, &lt;br&gt; Ja mais n'iert tels com fut als ancessors.''
** The world was good in the time of them of old, for in it was faith and justice and love, and there was belief, of which there is now no store. It [the world] is all changed, it has lost its colour; it will never be such as it was with them of old.
** [[w:Alexius of Rome#French version|''La Vie de Saint-Alexis'']] (c. 1040) str. 1, in ''The Oldest Monuments of the French Language'' (1912) p. 28 &lt;!-- French: ''A Primer of Old French'' (London: Blackie &amp; Son, Ltd, 1902) p. 28 --&gt;

* [[w:Ça Ira|''Ça Ira'']].
** It'll be fine.
** Revolutionary song (May 1790)

* [[w:fr:Car tel est notre plaisir|''Car tel est notre plaisir'']].
** For such is our pleasure.
** Royal prerogative of the kings of France. The formula concluded royal acts, and in particular letters patent, prepared by the [[w:Chancery (medieval office)#France|Chancery]]. See: Paul-Alexis Mellet, ''Les traités monarchomaques: confusion des temps, résistance armée et monarchie parfaite, 1560-1600'' (Genève: Librairie Droz, 2007), p. 250. Compare: [[Ulpian]], ''Digesta'', 1, 4, 1 &lt;!-- ''Quod principi placuit legis habet vigorem.'' --&gt;

* ''[[w:The king is dead, long live the king!|Le mort saisit le vif. Le roi est mort, vive le roi!]]''
** The dead seizes the living. The king is dead, long live the king!
** Traditional proclamation made following the accession of a new monarch. First declared upon the accession to the French throne of [[Charles VII of France|Charles VII]] after the death of his father [[Charles VI of France|Charles VI]] (21 October 1422)

* ''{{w|Liberté, égalité, fraternité}}''. 
** Liberty, equality, fraternity.
** Revolutionary motto (July 1790) &lt;!-- First quoted by [[Camille Desmoulins]] in ''Révolutions de France et de Brabant'', no. 35 (26 July 1790) p. 515, describing the July 1790 [[w:Fête de la Fédération|Fête de la Fédération]]: ''... les soldats-citoyens se précipiter dans les bras l’un de l’autre, en se promettant liberté, égalité, fraternité.'' / &quot;... the citizen-soldiers rushing into each other's arms, promising each other ''liberty, equality, fraternity''.&quot; --&gt;

* [[w:Anarchist symbolism#No gods, no masters|''Ni Dieu ni maître'']]. 
** No gods, no masters.
** [[Anarchist]] slogan. A similar phrase appeared in an 1870 pamphlet by a disciple of [[Louis Auguste Blanqui|Auguste Blanqui]]. The exact phrase appeared as the title of Blanqui's 1880 newspaper before it spread throughout the anarchist movement, appearing in [[Kropotkin]]'s ''Words of a Rebel'' (1885)

* [[w:Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)#Title phrase|''Que sera, sera'']].
** Whatever will be, will be.
** Heraldic motto, in John Audrey, ''The Natural History and Antiquities of the County of Surrey'', vol. 1 (London: printed for E. Curll, 1719), p. 234; the phrase also appears in John Bruce, ed., ''Calendar of State Papers, Domestic Series, of the Reign of Charles I'' (1864), p. 211 (entry for 19 Sept. 1634)

* ''Revenons à nos moutons.'' 
** Let us return to our sheep.
** ''[[La Farce de maître Pathelin]]'' (c. 1440). Reported in Hugh Percy Jones, ''Dictionary of Foreign Phrases and Classical Quotations'' (Edinburgh: John Grant, 1929) p. 328. Unattributed in [[Edward Leigh (writer)|Edward Leigh]], ''Analecta Caesarum'' (1664) p. 425

=== Greek ===
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Greek Anthology]]'''''
::'''''[[Greek proverbs]]'''''
::'''''[[Seven Sages of Greece]]'''''

* Εἴθ᾿ ἄπυρον καλὸν γενοίμην μέγα χρυσίον, &lt;br&gt; καί με καλὴ γυνὴ φοροίη καθαρὸν θεμένη νόον. 
** I would I were a jewel &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; Of costly gold and fine, &lt;br&gt; And a lovely woman wearing me &lt;br&gt; &amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp; With heart as true as mine!
** In Athenaeus, bk. 15, sec. 695d; translated by [[Walter Headlam|W. G. Headlam]], ''A Book of Greek Verse'' (1907), p. 39. Compare: [[Alfred Tennyson|Tennyson]], [[w:The Miller's Daughter (poem)|''The Miller's Daughter'']] · [[Joshua Sylvester|Sylvester]], ''Woodman's Bear'' · Shakespeare, ''[[Romeo and Juliet]]'', act 2, sc. 2, l. 23

* Ἦλθ’ ἦλθε χελιδὼν&lt;br&gt;καλὰς ὥρας ἄγουσα,&lt;br&gt;καλοὺς ἐνιαυτούς,&lt;br&gt;ἐπὶ γαστέρα λευκά,&lt;br&gt;ἐπὶ νῶτα μέλαινα.
** Come, come is the swallow,&lt;br&gt;With fair spring to follow.&lt;br&gt;She and the fair weather&lt;br&gt;Are come along together.&lt;br&gt;White is her breast,&lt;br&gt;And black all the rest.	
** &quot;[[w:Swallow song of Rhodes|Swallow Song of Rhodes]]&quot;, in [[Athenaeus]], bk. 8, 360b-d; translated by [[Henry Charles Beeching|H. C. Beeching]], ''Love in Idleness'' (1883), p. 177

=== Latin ===
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Gesta Romanorum]]'''''
::'''''[[Mass (liturgy)#Catholic Church|Latin Mass]]'''''
::'''''[[Latin proverbs]]'''''
::'''''[[Pervigilium Veneris]]'''''

* ''Adeste fideles læti triumphantes,&lt;br&gt;Venite, venite in Bethlehem.&lt;br&gt;Natum videte&lt;br&gt;Regem angelorum:&lt;br&gt;Venite adoremus&lt;br&gt;Dominum.''
** O come, all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant!&lt;br&gt;O come ye, O come ye to Bethlehem;&lt;br&gt;Come and behold Him&lt;br&gt;Born the King of Angels:&lt;br&gt;O come, let us adore Him,&lt;br&gt;Christ the Lord.
** &quot;{{w|O Come, All Ye Faithful}}&quot;, st. 1 (ed. [[w:John Francis Wade|Wade]], 1751), translated by [[Frederick Oakeley]] (1841) and revised in Francis H. Murray's ''A Hymnal, for Use in the English Church'' (1852) p. 26 (Oakeley's original 1841 version began 'Ye faithful, approach ye, joyfully triumphant')

* ''Cume tonas, Leucesie, prae tet tremonti &lt;br&gt; Quom tibei cunei, dextumum tonaront.''
** When thou thunderest, Light-god, before thee they tremble, &lt;br&gt; Sith thy bolts have thundered on the right.
** [[w:Carmen Saliare|''Carmen Saliare'']], quoted in a corrupt form by [[w:Quintus Terentius Scaurus|Scaurus]] in his ''De orthographia'', and translated from [[w:Theodor Bergk|Bergk]]'s conjectural restoration by J. Wright Duff, ''A Literary History of Rome from the Origins to the Close of the Golden Age'' (1909) p. 77 &lt;!-- See: [[w:Epithets of Jupiter|Epithets of Jupiter]] --&gt;

* ''Enos Lases iuuate'' (thrice). &lt;br&gt; ''Neue lue rue Marmar sins incurrere in pleores.'' (thrice) &lt;br&gt; ''Satur fu, fere Mars: limen sali, sta berber.'' (thrice) &lt;br&gt; ''Enos Marmor iuuato.'' (thrice) &lt;br&gt; ''Triumpe, triumpe, triumpe, triumpe, triumpe!''
** Help us, ye Lares. &lt;br&gt; Let not blight and ruin, O Mars, haste upon the multitude. &lt;br&gt; Be satiate, fierce Mars: leap the threshold, stay thy scourge &lt;br&gt; Summon ye in turn all the gods of sowing. &lt;br&gt; Help us, O Mars. &lt;br&gt; Huzza! Huzza! Huzza! etc.
** ''[[w:Carmen Arvale|Carmen Arvale]]'', from an inscription of 218 AD and written in a then-archaic form of Old Latin, as translated by [[w:J. Wright Duff|J. Wright Duff]], ''A Literary History of Rome from the Origins to the Close of the Golden Age'' (1909) p. 78

* ''{{w|Et in Arcadia ego}}.'' 
** Even in Arcadia, there am I.
** A ''memento mori'' from paintings by {{w|Guercino}} and [[Nicolas Poussin|Poussin]] (17th cent.)

* ''Gaudeamus igitur,&lt;br&gt;Iuvenes dum sumus!&lt;br&gt;Post iucundam iuventutem&lt;br&gt;Post molestam senectutem&lt;br&gt;Nos habebit humus.''
** Let us rejoice while we are young; for after the pleasures of youth, after the troubles of old age, we all shall be laid beneath the earth.
** &quot;[[w:Gaudeamus igitur|So Let Us Rejoice]]&quot;, st. 1 (c. 1267; ed. Christian Wilhelm Kindleben, 1781), as translated in ''The Presbyterian'', vol. 23, no. 51 (17 December 1853) p. 204&lt;!-- p. 4 of the issue --&gt;&lt;!-- Compare: J. A. Symonds, ''Wine, Women, and Song'' (London: Chatto and Windus, 1884) no. 60, p. 165.  John Hollander, ''Melodious Guile'' (Yale UP, 1988) p. 38. J. A. Pearce Jr. (1860) in [[w:Henry Randall Waite|H. R. Waite]] (ed.) ''Carmina Collegensia'' (January 1876) p. 71 --&gt;

* ''[[Illegitimi non carborundum]]''. 
** Don't let the bastards grind you down. (lit. &quot;The unlawful are not silicon carbide.&quot;)
** [[W:dog latin|Dog latin]] phrase (c. 1941)

* ''[[w:Sic transit gloria mundi|Sic transit gloria mundi]]''.
** Thus passeth the glory of the world.
** Phrase spoken in papal coronations between 1409 and 1963. The master of ceremonies would fall to his knees before the pope, holding a silver or brass reed, bearing a tow of smoldering flax. For three times in succession, as the cloth burned away, he would say in a loud and mournful voice: &quot;''Pater Sancte, sic transit gloria mundi!''&quot;

* ''[[w:Vox populi|Vox populi, vox Dei]]''.
** The voice of the people is the voice of God.
** Quoted and argued against by [[Alcuin of York]] in a letter to [[Charlemagne]] (AD 798)

=== Oriental ===

;Mesopotamian
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Epic of Gilgamesh]]''

* You climb to the mountains surveying the earth,&lt;br&gt;You suspend from the heavens the circle of the lands.
* You never fail to cross the wide expanse of sea,&lt;br&gt;The depth of which the Igigi know not.
* The heavens are not enough as the vessel into which you gaze,&lt;br&gt;The sum of the lands is inadequate as a seer's bowl.
** ''Great Hymn to Šamaš'', 21, 35, 154; tr. W. G. Lambert, ''Babylonian Wisdom Literature'' (Oxford, 1960), pp. 127 ff

;Egyptian
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Book of the Dead]]'''''
::'''''[[Great Hymn to the Aten]]'''''
::'''''[[Teaching for King Merykara]]'''''

* No one goes away and then comes back.
** ''The Song of the Harper'', st. 10, as translated by [[w:William Kelly Simpson|W. K. Simpson]] in ''The Literature of Ancient Egypt'' (1972), pp. 296–327

* Remember: it is not given to man to take his goods with him.
** ''The Song of the Harper'', st. 10, as translated by W. K. Simpson (1972)

* There is no one who can return from there, &lt;br&gt; To describe their nature, to describe their dissolution, &lt;br&gt; That he may still our desires, &lt;br&gt; Until we reach the place where they have gone. 
** ''The Song of the Harper'', st. 5, as translated by W. K. Simpson (1972)

;Indian
:'''''See also:'''''
::'''''[[Vedas]]'''''
::'''''[[Puranas]]'''''

* Listen to the Exhortation of the Dawn!&lt;br&gt;Look to this Day!&lt;br&gt;For it is Life, the very Life of Life.&lt;br&gt;In its brief Course lie all the&lt;br&gt;Varieties and Realities of your Existence:&lt;br&gt;The Bliss of Growth,&lt;br&gt;The Glory of Action,&lt;br&gt;The Splendour of Beauty;&lt;br&gt;For Yesterday is but a Dream&lt;br&gt;And Tomorrow is only a Vision;&lt;br&gt;But Today well lived makes&lt;br&gt;Every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness,&lt;br&gt;And every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope.&lt;br&gt;Look well therefore to this Day!&lt;br&gt;Such is the Salutation of the Dawn!
** &quot;From the [[Sanskrit]]&quot;, in Alleyne Ireland (ed.) [https://archive.org/details/masterpiecesofre002909mbp/page/300/mode/2up ''Masterpieces of Religious Verse''] (Harper &amp; Bros, 1905) p. 301 &lt;!-- &quot;The Salutation of the Dawn&quot; --&gt;

== See also ==
* [[Proverbs]], which are often passed down through the generations anonymously
* [[Bible]] — much of its material is of disputed authorship and is not believed to have been written by its purported authors
* [[Laozi]] — likely mythical founder of [[Taoism]], most sayings attributed to him were probably written anonymously

== External links ==
{{wikisource portal|Anonymous texts}}

[[Category:People]]

[[es:Anónimo]]
[[ka:ანონიმურები]]</text>
      <sha1>10chfvithwcupoil1c459tp52apxziw</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Dwight D. Eisenhower</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>104</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964900</id>
      <parentid>3914883</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:37:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GazWild</username>
        <id>2867170</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>....bulldozer, the jeep, the two-and-a-half-ton truck, and the C-47 airplane</comment>
      <origin>3964900</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="167322" sha1="ff33pub1omb8rq4df6f0h8xjcyzpdnc" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Dwight D. Eisenhower, official Presidential portrait.jpg|thumb|right|No [[people]] on [[earth]] can be held, as a people, to be an [[enemy]], for [[all]] [[humanity]] shares the common hunger for [[peace]] and fellowship and [[justice]].]]
[[File:SHAEF Schulterstück.jpg|thumb|right|I'm going to command [[w:Supreme Headquarters Allied Expeditionary Force|the whole shebang]].]]
'''[[w:Dwight David Eisenhower|Dwight David Eisenhower]]''' ([[October 14|14 October]] [[1890]] – [[March 28|28 March]] [[1969]]), also widely known by his nickname '''&quot;Ike&quot;''', was an American [[w:military officer|military officer]] and statesman who served as the 34th [[w:president of the United States|president of the United States]] from 1953 to 1961. During [[World War II]], he served as [[w:Supreme Commander of the Allied Expeditionary Force|Supreme Commander of the Allied Expeditionary Force]] in Europe, and achieved the rare [[w:five-star rank|five-star rank]] of [[w:General of the Army (United States)|General of the Army]]. He was responsible for planning and supervising the invasion of North Africa in [[w:Operation Torch|Operation Torch]] in 1942–1943 and the successful [[w:invasion of Normandy|invasion of Normandy]] in 1944–1945 from the [[w:Western Front (World War II)|Western Front]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Dwight D Eisenhower.jpg|thumb|right|This is a long tough road we have to [[travel]].]]
[[File:Thomas Edgar Stephens - Dwight D. Eisenhower - Google Art Project.jpg|thumb|right|Soldiers, sailors, and airmen of the [[w:Supreme Headquarters Allied Expeditionary Force|Allied Expeditionary Force!]] You are about to embark upon the [[w:Invasion of Normandy|Great Crusade]], toward which we have striven these many months.]]

*We were depending on considerable assistance from the [[Insurrection|insurrectionists]] in [[France]]. Throughout France the [[w:French Resistance|Free French]] had been of inestimable value in the campaign. ... Without their great assistance the [[w:Liberation of France|liberation of France]] and the defeat of the enemy in [[w:Western Europe|Western Europe]] would have consumed a much longer time and meant greater losses to ourselves.
**As quoted in [http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/06/opinions/kaiser-ve-day-french-resistance/index.html &quot;What Americans forget about French resistance&quot;] (7 May 2015), by [[w:Charles Kaiser|Charles Kaiser]], ''Cable News Network'', Atlanta, Georgia.

* When I was a small boy in [[Kansas]], a [[friend]] of mine and I went fishing and as we sat there in the warmth of the summer afternoon on a river bank, we talked about what we wanted to do when we grew up. I told him that I wanted to be a real major league [[baseball]] player, a genuine professional like [[w:Honus Wagner|Honus Wagner]]. My friend said that he'd like to be [[President of the United States]]. '''Neither of us got our [[wish]].'''
** As quoted in ''Baseball's Greatest Quotes'' (1992) by Paul Dickson; cited in [http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/robinson/jrgmday.html &quot;Game Day in the Majors&quot; at the Library of Congress] &lt;!-- Accessed 2008·04·22 --&gt;

* If a problem cannot be solved, enlarge it.
** apocryphal**
===1940s===
[[File:Eisenhower d-day.jpg|thumb|right|The eyes of the world are upon you. The [[hopes]] and [[prayers]] of [[liberty]]-loving people everywhere march with you.]]
[[File:Into the Jaws of Death 23-0455M edit.jpg|thumb|right|Your task will not be an easy one.]]
[[File:LIFE 06191944 Eisenhower cover.jpg|thumb|right|We will accept nothing less than full [[Victory]]! Good luck! And let us all beseech the blessing of Almighty [[God]] upon this great and noble undertaking.]]
[[File:Eisenhower and Strauss.jpg|thumb|right|[[War]] is [[mankind]]'s most tragic and stupid folly; to seek or advise its deliberate provocation is a black [[crime]] against all men.]]
* '''I'm going to command [[w:Supreme Headquarters Allied Expeditionary Force|the whole shebang]].'''
** Comment to his wife [[w:Mamie Eisenhower|Mamie]], after being informed by [[George Marshall]] that he would be in command of [[w:Operation Overlord|Operation Overlord]], as quoted in ''Eisenhower : A Soldier's Life'' (2003) by Carlo D'Este, p. 307

* The chief of staff says I'm the guy.
** Journal entry after being informed by [[George Marshall]] that he would be in command of [[w:Operation Overlord|Operation Overlord]], as quoted in ''Eisenhower : A Soldier's Life'' (2003) by Carlo D'Este, p. 307

* '''This is a long tough road we have to travel.''' The men that can do things are going to be sought out just as surely as the sun rises in the morning. Fake reputations, habits of glib and clever speech, and glittering surface performance are going to be discovered.
** Letter to [[w:Vernon Prichard|Vernon Prichard]] (27 August 1942), published in ''The Papers of Dwight David Eisenhower'' (1970) edited by [[Alfred Dupont Chandler]], p. 505

* Today we are fighting in [[Italy|a country]] which was contributed a great deal to our [[cultural]] inheritance, a country rich in monuments which...illustrate the growth of the [[civilization]] which is ours. We are bound to [[respect]] those [[monuments]] so far as [[war]] allows. If we have to choose between destroying a [[famous]] [[building]] and sacrificing our own [[men]], then our men's [[lives]] count infinitely more and the building must go. But the choice is not always so clear-cut as that. Nothing can stand against the argument of [[military]] [[necessity]]. That is an accepted principle. But the phrase 'military necessity' is sometimes used where it would be more truthful to speak of military [[convenience]] or even personal convenience. I do not want it to cloak slackness or [[indifference]]. It is a [[responsibility]] of high commanders to determine through AMC Officers the locations of [[historical]] [[monuments]] whether they be immediately ahead of our front lines or in areas occupied by us. This information passed to lower echleons through normal channels places the responsibility on all commanders of complying with the spirit of this letter.
** December 29, 1943 letter as qtd. in &quot;The Law of Armed Conflict: Constraints on the Contemporary Use of Military Force&quot;, edited by Howard M. Hensel, 2007, p. 58.

* Shortly we will be fighting our way across the Continent of [[Europe]] in battles designed to preserve our [[civilization]]. Inevitably, in the path of our advance will be found historical monuments and cultural centers which symbolize to the world all that we are fighting to preserve. It is the [[responsibility]] of every commander to protect and respect these symbols whenever possible. In some circumstances the success of the military operation may be prejudiced in our reluctance to destroy these revered objects. Then, as at [[w:Cassino|Cassino]], where the enemy relied on our [[emotional]] attachments to shield his defense, the [[lives]] of our men are paramount. So, where military necessity dictates, commanders may order the required action even though it involves [[destruction]] to some [[honored]] site. But there are many circumstances in which damage and destruction are not necessary and cannot be [[justified]]. In such cases, through the exercise of restraint and discipline, commanders will preserve centers and objects of [[historical]] and cultural significance. Civil Affairs Staffs at higher echleons will advise commanders of the locations of historical monuments of this type both in advance of the front lines and in occupied areas. This information together with the necessary instruction, will be passe down through command channels to all echleons.
** May 26 1944 letter as qtd. in &quot;The Law of Armed Conflict: Constraints on the Contemporary Use of Military Force&quot;, edited by Howard M. Hensel, 2007, p. 58.

* '''[[Soldiers]], Sailors and Airmen of the [[w:Supreme Headquarters Allied Expeditionary Force|Allied Expeditionary Force!]] &lt;br&gt; You are about to embark upon the [[w:Invasion of Normandy|Great Crusade]], toward which we have striven these many months. The eyes of the world are upon you. The hopes and prayers of [[liberty]]-loving people everywhere march with you.''' In company with our brave Allies and brothers-in-arms on other Fronts, you will bring about the destruction of the German [[war]] machine, the elimination of [[Nazi]] [[tyranny]] over the oppressed peoples of Europe, and security for ourselves in a [[free]] world.&lt;br&gt; '''Your task will not be an easy one.''' Your enemy is well trained, well equipped and battle hardened. He will fight savagely. &lt;br&gt;But this is the year 1944! Much has happened since the Nazi triumphs of 1940-41. The [[w:Allies of World War II|United Nations]] have inflicted upon the [[Germany|Germans]] great defeats, in open battle, man-to-man. Our air offensive has seriously reduced their strength in the air and their capacity to wage war on the ground. Our Home Fronts have given us an overwhelming superiority in weapons and munitions of war, and placed at our disposal great reserves of trained fighting men. '''The tide has turned! The free men of the world are marching together to [[Victory]]!''' &lt;br&gt;I have full confidence in your [[courage]] and devotion to duty and skill in battle.&lt;br&gt; '''We will accept nothing less than full Victory! Good luck! And let us beseech the blessing of Almighty [[God]] upon this great and noble undertaking.'''
** [http://www.3ad.com/history/wwll/feature.pages/d.day.letters.htm Order of the Day (2 June 1944), a message to troops before the Normandy landings], reported in Franklin Watts, ''Voices of History'' (1945), p. 260

* Our landings in the [[w:Cherbourg|Cherbourg]]-[[w:Le Havre|Havre]] area have failed to gain a satisfactory foothold and I have withdrawn the troops. '''My decision to attack at this time and place was based on the best information available.''' The troops, the air and the Navy did all that bravery and devotion to duty could do. '''If any blame or fault attaches to the attempt, it is mine alone.'''
** [http://doinghistoryproject.tripod.com/id17.html Notes for an announcement, written in advance of the Normandy invasion, in case of its failure, but never delivered (June 1944)]; reported in John Gunther, ''Eisenhower: The Man and the Symbol'' (1952), p. 41

* '''Kinship among [[nations]] is not determined in such measurements as proximity of size and age.''' Rather we should turn to those inner things — call them what you will — I mean those intangibles that are the real treasures free men possess. To preserve his freedom of worship, his equality before law, his liberty to speak and act as he sees fit, subject only to provisions that he trespass not upon similar rights of others — a [[London|Londoner]] will fight. So will a citizen of [[w:Abilene, Texas|Abilene]]. When we consider these things, then the valley of the [[w:Thames|Thames]] draws closer to the farms of Kansas and the plains of [[Texas]].
** [http://books.google.com/books?id=Dp94AAAAMAAJ&amp;q=&amp;quot;Kinship+among+nations+is+not+determined+in+such+measurements+as+proximity+size+and+age&amp;quot; Speech] at [[w:Guildhall, London|Guildhall, London]] (12 June 1945) &lt;!-- accessdate = 2012-06-07 --&gt;

* '''[[Humility]] must always be the portion of any man who receives acclaim earned in blood of his followers and sacrifices of his friends.'''
** [http://books.google.com/books?id=cF9AE1zYRkwC&amp;q=&amp;quot;Humility+must+always+be+the+portion+of+any+man+who+receives+acclaim+earned+in+blood+of+his+followers+and+sacrifices+of+his+friends&amp;quot;&amp;pg=PA223#v=onepage Speech] at [[w:Guildhall, London|Guildhall, London]] (12 June 1945) &lt;!-- accessdate = 2012-06-07 --&gt;

*'''I thought so at first, but there is reason to believe that [[Adolf Hitler|he]] is still alive'''. But that in itself does not constitute a problem. 
** *On being asked whether he thought '''[[Hitler]]''' was dead. Reported in the ''[[w:Ottawa Citizen|Ottawa Citizen]]'', October 6, 1945: ''Reason to Believe Hitler is Alive Eisenhower Says'', London, Oct. 7 - (CP) - &quot;Gen. Eisenhower was reported by the [[w:Dutch people|Dutch]] [[radio]] Saturday to have told Dutch [[Newspapers|newspapermen]] there was 'reason to believe' that Hitler was still alive. The broadcast, recorded by [[w:BBC|BBC]], said that one of the correspondents accompanying Eisenhower on a visit to [[w:The Hague|The Hague]] asked the general if he thought Hitler was dead.&quot; [http://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=2194&amp;dat=19451006&amp;id=ziQzAAAAIBAJ&amp;sjid=BtwFAAAAIBAJ&amp;pg=4271,1394927] [https://www.google.com/#q=%22but+there+is+reason+to+believe+that+he+is+still+alive%22+eisenhower]

* '''Steady, Monty. You can't speak to me like that. I'm your boss.'''
** Response to violent criticism by [[Bernard Montgomery, 1st Viscount Montgomery of Alamein]] about Eisenhower's broad front tactics before [[w:Operation Market Garden|Operation Market Garden]], as quoted in ''Arnhem — A Tragedy of Errors'' (1994) by Peter Harclerode, p. 27 and BBC documentary ''D-Day to Berlin'', on Eisenhower's aircraft at Brussels airport on 10 September 1944.

* '''I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its stupidity.'''
** Speech in [[w:Ottawa|Ottawa]] (10 January 1946), published in ''Eisenhower Speaks : Dwight D. Eisenhower in His Messages and Speeches'' (1948) edited by Rudolph L. Treuenfels

*The freedom of the individual and his willingness to follow real leadership are at the core of [[America]]'s [[strength]].
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Address at Norwich University], Northfield, Vermont (9 June 1946)

* [[Democracy]] is essentially a political system that recognizes the equality of humans before the law.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Address to Constituent Assembly, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil] (8 August 1946)

* '''[[War]] is [[Humanity|mankind]]'s most tragic and stupid folly; to seek or advise its deliberate provocation is a black [[crime]] against all men.''' Though you follow the trade of the warrior, you do so in the spirit of [[George Washington|Washington]] — not of [[Genghis Khan]]. For Americans, only threat to our way of life justifies resort to conflict.
** [http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html Graduation Exercises at the United States Military Academy at West Point, New York, U.S. (3 June 1947)]

*Incidentally, four other pieces of equipment that most senior officers came to regard as among the most vital to our success in Africa and Europe were the bulldozer, the jeep, the two-and-a-half-ton truck, and the C-47 airplane. Curiously enough, none of these items is designed for combat.
**''Crusade in Europe'' (1948), Eisenhower, William Heinemann Ltd (Melbourne, London, Toronto), p. 181.
*The proudest [[human]] that walks the earth is a free American citizen.
**[https://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Talk at the Commercial Club of Chicago] (21 May 1948)

*To blend, without coercion, the individual good and the common good is the essence of citizenship in a free country.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Columbia University Inaugural Address] (12 October 1948)

* The free individual has been justified as his own master; the state as his servant.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Commencement Address at Columbia University] (1 June 1949)

===1950s===
[[File:Dwight D. Eisenhower, official photo portrait, May 29, 1959.jpg|thumb|right|[[History]] does not long entrust the care of [[freedom]] to the weak or the timid. We must acquire proficiency in defense and display stamina in [[purpose]].]]
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|right|A preventive [[war]], to my mind, is an impossibility today. ... That isn't preventive war; that is war. I don't [[believe]] there is such a thing; and, frankly, I wouldn't even listen to anyone seriously that came in and talked about such a thing.]]
[[File:Salk Ike 55.jpg|thumb|right|The work of [[Jonas Salk|Dr. Salk]] is in the highest tradition of selfless and dedicated medical research.]]
[[File:Year of the Earth Dog 2018.png|thumb|[[Importance|What counts]] is not [[necessarily]] the size of the [[dog]] in the [[fight]] — it's the [[Determination|size of the fight in the dog]].]]
[[File:Martin Luther King Jr. addresses a crowd from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, USMC-09611.jpg|thumb|right|I [[believe]] that the [[United States]] as a [[government]], if it is going to be true to its own founding documents, does have the job of working toward that [[time]] when there is no discrimination made on such inconsequential reason as [[race]], color, or [[religion]].]]
[[File:Fist Bump for Equality.png|thumb|right|We have not taken and we shall not take a single backward step. There must be no second class citizens in this country.]]
[[File:Dwight-eisenhower-gold-watch-1.jpg|thumb|right|Change based on principle is progress. Constant change without principle becomes chaos.]]
[[File:Flag of the United States (1912-1959).svg|thumb|right|The history of free men is never really written by chance-but by choice-their choice.]]
[[File:Golden statue.jpg|thumb|right|May the [[light]] of [[freedom]], coming to all darkened lands, flame brightly — until at last the [[darkness]] is no more. May the turbulence of our age yield to a true [[time]] of [[peace]], when men and [[nations]] shall share a [[life]] that [[honors]] the [[dignity]] of each, the [[brotherhood]] of [[all]].]]
[[File:AlfredPalmerM3tank1942b.jpg|thumb|The peace we seek and need means much more than mere absence of war. It means the acceptance of law, and the fostering of justice, in all the world.]]
[[File:Hardtack Umbrella nuke.jpg|thumb|right|We look upon this shaken [[Earth]], and we declare our firm and fixed [[purpose]] — the building of a [[peace]] with [[justice]] in a [[world]] where [[moral]] [[law]] prevails. The building of such a peace is a bold and solemn [[purpose]]. To proclaim it is easy. To serve it will be hard.]]

* '''[[Censorship]], in my [[opinion]], is a [[stupid]] and shallow way of approaching the solution to any problem.''' Though sometimes [[necessary]], as witness a professional and technical secret that may have a bearing upon the welfare and very safety of this country, we should be very careful in the way we apply it, because in censorship always lurks the very great [[danger]] of working to the disadvantage of the American nation.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html#censorship Associated Press luncheon] (24 April 1950), New York City, New York

* '''The hand of the aggressor is stayed by [[strength]] — and strength alone.'''
** A speech at an English Speaking Union Dinner (3 July 1951). It is currently on display on the wall of Eisenhower Hall at the USMA at West Point in New York. [http://www.eisenhowermemorial.org/speeches/19510703%20English%20Speaking%20Union%20Dinner.htm Eisenhower Memorial Commission]

* '''Neither a wise man or a brave man lies down on the tracks of [[history]] to wait for the train of the [[future]] to run over him.'''
** As quoted in ''Time'' magazine (6 October 1952)

* '''There is -- in world affairs -- a steady course to be followed between an assertion of strength that is truculent and a confession of helplessness that is cowardly.'''
** State of the Union Address (February 2, 1952). Source: Eisenhower Presidential Library. [https://web.archive.org/web/20210125121539/https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes Archived] from the [https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes original] on January 25, 2021.

*The true purpose of [[education]] is to prepare young men and women for effective citizenship in a free form of government.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Speech at Williamsburg College] (15 May 1953)

*'''May we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion.'''
**[http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/?pid=9906 Address at the Columbia University National Bicentennial Dinner, New York City.] (31 May 1954)

* '''We have not taken and we shall not take a single backward step. There must be no second class citizens in this country.'''
** Letter to [[w:Adam Clayton Powell Jr.|Adam Clayton Powell Jr.]] (June 6, 1953); Source: [https://books.google.de/books?id=iOsH3GosOr4C&amp;pg=PA9743&amp;lpg=PA9743&amp;dq=We+have+not+taken+and+we+shall+not+take+a+single+backward+step.+There+must+be+no+second+class+citizens+in+this+country.&amp;source=bl&amp;ots=K03o4EGJa7&amp;sig=ACfU3U0UNcrI-GB16SjdgDCoI3g2chwJkg&amp;hl=de&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=2ahUKEwjVu9eS9rzuAhUJkhQKHeSKBNEQ6AEwBXoECAYQAg#v=onepage&amp;q=We%20have%20not%20taken%20and%20we%20shall%20not%20take%20a%20single%20backward%20step.%20There%20must%20be%20no%20second%20class%20citizens%20in%20this%20country.&amp;f=false United States of America Congressional Record: Proceedings and Debates of the 84th Congress, First Session, Volume 101, Part 8, July 1, 1955 to July 19, 1955 (Pages 9697 to 11002), here page 9743].

*Don't join the [[Book burning|book burners]]. Don't think you are going to conceal faults by concealing [[evidence]] that they ever existed. Don't be afraid to go in your [[Libraries|library]] and read every [[Books|book]], as long as that document does not offend our own ideas of decency. That should be the only [[censorship]].
** [http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html#censorship Remarks at the Dartmouth College Commencement Exercises] (14 June 1953)

* From this day forward, the millions of our school children will daily proclaim in every city, every village, and every rural schoolhouse, the dedication of our nation and our people to the Almighty.
** [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/?pid=9920 Signing into law the phrase &quot;One nation under God&quot; into the Pledge of Allegiance] (14 June 1954)

* There is one thing about being President — nobody can tell you when to sit down.
** As quoted in&quot;Sayings of the Week&quot; in ''The Observer'' (9 August 1953), and ''The MacMillan Dictionary of Quotations'' (1989) by John Daintith, Hazel Egerton, Rosalind Ferguson, Anne Stibbs and Edmund Wright, p. 447

* We must, even in our honest political fervor, fear neither partisan criticism nor self-criticism. For the pretense of perfection is not one of the marks of good public servants. And we; must, even in our zeal to defeat the enemies of freedom, never betray ourselves into seizing their weapons to make our own defense. A people or a party that is young and sober and confident and free has no need of censors to purify its thought or stiffen its will. For the kind of America in which we; believe is too strong ever to acknowledge fear-and too wise ever to fear knowledge. This is the kind of America-and the kind of Republican Party-in which I believe. I do not know how to define it with political labels. Such labels are, in our age, cheap and abundant. But they mean as little as they cost. We are many things. We are liberal-for we do believe that, in judging his own daily welfare, each citizen, however humble, has greater wisdom than any government, however great. We are progressive-for we are less impressed with the difficulties we observed yesterday than the opportunities we envision tomorrow. And we are conservative-for we can conceive of no higher commission that history could have conferred upon us than that which we humbly bear-the preservation, in this time of tempest and of peril, of the spiritual values that alone give dignity and meaning to man's pilgrimage on this earth. 
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728380.1953.001&amp;seq=7 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1953 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 20 to December 31, 1953, Address at the New England “Forward to ‘54” Dinner, Boston, Massachusetts. September 21, 1953, P.600]

* From behind the Iron Curtain, there are signs that [[tyranny]] is in trouble and reminders that its structure is as brittle as its surface is hard.
** [http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/avwebsite/PDF/54text.pdf State of the Union Address to Congress] (7 January 1954)

* '''You have broader considerations that might follow what you would call the ''falling domino'' principle'''. You have a row of dominoes set up. You knock over the first one, and what will happen to the last one is the certainty that it will go over very quickly. So you could have the beginning of a disintegration that would have the most profound influences.
** [http://coursesa.matrix.msu.edu/~hst306/documents/domino.html Press conference (7 April 1954), introducing the &quot;domino theory&quot; as a justification for US intervention in Indochina]

* '''The general limits of your freedom are merely these: that you do not trespass upon the equal rights of others.'''
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Remarks to the National Society of the Daughters of the American Revolution] (22 April 1954)

* Once he called upon [[W:George B. McClellan|General McClellan]], and [[Abraham Lincoln|the President]] went over to the General's house — a process which I as­sure you has been reversed long since — and General McClellan decided he did not want to see the President, and went to bed.&lt;br&gt;Lincoln's friends criticized him severely for allowing a mere General to treat him that way. And he said, &quot;All I want out of General McClellan is a [[victory]], and if to hold his [[horse]] will bring it, I will gladly hold his horse.&quot;
**[http://www.eisenhowermemorial.org/speeches/19540423%20Remarks%20at%20the%20Birthplace%20of%20Abraham%20Lincoln.htm &quot;Remarks at the Birthplace of Abraham Lincoln&quot;], Hodgenville, Kentucky (April 23, 1954). The [http://books.google.com/books?id=AsrfAAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA128 story originates] from F. A. Mitchel, son and aide of General Mitchel.

* '''You have got to have something in which to believe. You have got to have leaders, organization, friendships, and contacts that help you to believe that, and help you to put out your best.'''
** Remarks to the Leaders of the United Defense Fund (April 29, 1954). Source: Eisenhower Presidential Library. [https://web.archive.org/web/20210125121539/https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes Archived] from the [https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes original] on January 25, 2021.

* Here in America we are descended in blood and in spirit from revolutionaries and rebels—men and women who dared to dissent from accepted doctrine. As their heirs, may we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion.
** Speech at the [[w:Columbia University Bicentennial|Columbia University Bicentennial]] (31 May 1954), ''Public papers of the Presidents of the United States: Dwight D. Eisenhower '' (1961), p. 524

* '''All of us have heard this term &quot;[[w:preventive war|preventive war]]&quot; since the earliest days of [[Hitler]]. I recall that is about the first time I heard it.''' In this day and time, if we believe for one second that nuclear fission and fusion, that type of weapon, would be used in such a war — what is a preventive war? &lt;br&gt; I would say a preventive war, if the words mean anything, is to wage some sort of quick police action in order that you might avoid a terrific cataclysm of destruction later. &lt;br&gt; '''A preventive war, to my mind, is an impossibility today.''' How could you have one if one of its features would be several cities lying in ruins, several cities where many, many thousands of people would be dead and injured and mangled, the transportation systems destroyed, sanitation implements and systems all gone? '''That isn't preventive war; that is war. &lt;br&gt; I don't believe there is such a thing; and, frankly, I wouldn't even listen to anyone seriously that came in and talked about such a thing. &lt;br&gt; ... It seems to me that when, by definition, a term is just ridiculous in itself, there is no use in going any further.''' &lt;br&gt; There are all sorts of reasons, moral and political and everything else, against this theory, but it is so completely unthinkable in today's conditions that I thought it is no use to go any further. 
** [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/print.php?pid=9977 News Conference of (11 August 1954)]
** Variant: When people speak to you about a preventive war, you tell them to go and fight it. After my experience, I have come to hate war. War settles nothing.
*** Quoted in ''Quote'' magazine (4 April 1965) and ''The Quotable Dwight D. Eisenhower'' (1967) edited by Elsie Gollagher, p. 219&lt;!-- seldom found variants: '''All of us have heard this term 'preventative war' since the earliest days of Hitler. I recall that is about the first time I heard it. In this day and time... I don't believe there is such a thing; and, frankly, I wouldn't even listen to anyone seriously that came in and talked about such a thing.'''
** A preventative war, to my mind, is an impossibility. I don't believe there is such a thing, and frankly I wouldn't even listen to anyone seriously that came in and talked about such a thing.--&gt;

* '''Should any [[Political parties|political party]] attempt to abolish [[Social Security (United States)|social security]], [[w:Unemployment_insurance|unemployment insurance]], and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history.''' There is a tiny splinter group, of course, that believes you can do these things. Among them are [[w:H. L. Hunt|H. L. Hunt]] (you possibly know his background), a few other [[Texas]] [[oil]] [[Millionaire|millionaires]], and an occasional [[Politicians|politician]] or [[Businessperson|business man]] from other areas. Their number is negligible and they are [[stupid]].
** [http://web.archive.org/web/20100216204935/http://www.eisenhowermemorial.org/presidential-papers/first-term/documents/1147.cfm Letter to Edgar Newton Eisenhower], his brother (8 November 1954) [http://www.snopes.com/politics/quotes/ike.asp More information at Snopes.com]

* I believe that a political party, to be a useful agency in this country for the promotion of the happiness of our people, must be a progressive, dynamic force; it must have a doctrine, a program, legislative and otherwise, that is; moderate in its approach, avoiding extremes of right and left. As I have told you before, I think it must be liberal when it is talking about the relationship between the Government and the individual; conservative when talking about the national economy and the individual's pocketbook. That is my rough conception of progressivism, and I believe the Republican Party must be that or it won't be any force long in American life. I just don't believe that; Americans, 163 [million] intelligent Americans, are going to be satisfied either with the action or with such a distinct trend toward centralization and paternalism in our Government that it becomes difficult to detect it from a socialistic form. So I don't care when this occurs; I am not talking about conventions, I am not thinking of such things. I am thinking merely of where does a great party like the Republican Party, what direction does it have to take, if it is going to be a useful agency for America.
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728402.1954.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1954 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1954,  The President’s News Conference of December 2, 1954, P.1078]

* This is something, eh, that is the kind of thing that must be gone through with what I believe is best not talked about too much until we know whatever answers there will be.
** Response to questions about the investigation of [[Robert Oppenheimer]]'s supposed Communist sympathies
** ''Public Papers of the Presidents of the United States''. Dwight D. Eisenhower (1954), p. 435
** Cited in {{cite book
 | last = Brendon
 | first = Piers
 | title = Ike: His Life &amp; Times
 | edition = 1st edition
 | year = 1986
 | publisher = Harper &amp; Row
 | location = New York
 | id = {{ISBN|0-06-015508-6}}
 | pages = p. 270 of 478
 | chapter = The Dawn of Tranquility
}}

* Now I think, speaking roughly, '''by leadership we mean the art of getting someone else to do something that you want done because he wants to do it.'''
** As quoted in ''The Federal Career Service: A Look Ahead'' (1954)

* I have tried to find a phrase in which to define what the Republican Party has done at home. I have said we were &quot;progressive moderates.&quot; Right at the moment I rather favor the term &quot;dynamic conservatism.&quot; I believe we should be conservative. I believe we should conserve on everything that is basic to our system. We should be dynamic in applying it to the problems of the day so that all 163 million Americans will profit from it. So for the moment I would say the record at home has been dynamic conservatism. You can go into the fields of agriculture, of the freedoms that have been restored to our economy, to the tax system-to everything we have done.
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728407.1955.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1955 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1955, Remarks at Luncheon Meeting of the Republican National Committee and the Republican National Finance Committee.  February 17, 1955, P.270]

* '''Without God, there could be no American form of Government''', nor an American way of life. Recognition of the Supreme Being is the first—the most basic—expression of Americanism. Thus the [[Founding Fathers of the United States|Founding Fathers]] saw it, and thus, with God's help, it will continue to be.
** From [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/?pid=10414 remarks recorded for the &quot;Back to God&quot; Program] of the American Legion, which was broadcast over radio and television from 8:00 – 8:30 PM on 20 February 1955

* '''The work of [[Jonas Salk|Dr. Salk]] is in the highest tradition of selfless and dedicated medical research.''' He has provided a means for the control of [[Polio|a dread disease]]. By helping scientists in other countries with technical information; by offering to them the strains of seed virus and professional aid so that the production of vaccine can be started by them everywhere; by welcoming them to his laboratory that they may gain a fuller knowledge, '''Dr. Salk is a benefactor of mankind. &lt;br&gt; His achievement, a credit to our entire scientific community, does honor to all the people of the United States.'''
** [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/index.php?pid=10457 Remarks while presenting a Presidential citation] to [[Jonas Salk]] (22 April 1955)

* In attempting to summarize the philosophy of the Republican Party I, myself, have sometimes used such phrases as moderate progressive and dynamic conservative, because we want to be known for what we are, the party of progress. And if we are the party of progress, we must be the party of peace and prosperity, because this is implicit in the term &quot;progress.&quot;
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728407.1955.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1955 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1955, Remarks at the Breakfast Meeting of Republican State Chairmen, Denver, Colorado. September 10, 1955, P.814]

* I think the women, therefore, must be concerned with these values, and I return to my statement that '''if a political party does not have its foundation in the determination to advance a cause that is right and that is moral, then it is not a political party; it is merely a conspiracy to seize power.'''
**[http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/?pid=10746 Remarks at Fourth Annual Republican Women's National Conference (6 March 1956)]

* '''Change based on principle is progress. Constant change without principle becomes chaos.'''
** Address at the Cow Palace on Accepting the Nomination of the Republican National Convention (August 23, 1956). Source: Eisenhower Presidential Library. [https://web.archive.org/web/20210125121539/https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes Archived] from the [https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes original] on January 25, 2021.

* '''The essence of leadership is to get others to do something because they think you want it done and because they know it is worth while doing''' -- that is what we are talking about.
** Remarks at the Republican Campaign Picnic at the President's Gettysburg Farm (September 12, 1956). Source: Eisenhower Presidential Library. [https://web.archive.org/web/20210125121539/https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes Archived] from the [https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes original] on January 25, 2021.

* '''The history of free men is never really written by chance-but by choice-their choice.'''
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Address in Pittsburgh] (9 October 1956)

* '''The only way to win the next world war is to prevent it.'''
** Address at a Rally in the Civic Auditorium, Seattle, Washington (October 17, 1956). Source: Eisenhower Presidential Library. [https://web.archive.org/web/20210125121539/https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes Archived] from the [https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes original] on January 25, 2021.

* We have erased [[Racial segregation|segregation]] in those areas of national life to which Federal authority clearly extends. So doing in this, my friends, we have neither sought nor claimed partisan credit, and all such actions are nothing more -- nothing less than the rendering of justice. And we have always been aware of this great truth: '''the final battle against [[intolerance]] is to be fought -- not in the chambers of any [[legislature]] -- but in the hearts of men.'''
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html Address at the Hollywood Bowl] (19 October 1956)

* But I believe this: by and large, the United States ought to be able to choose for its President anybody that it wants, regardless of the number of terms he has served. That is what I believe. Now, some people have said &quot;You let him get enough power and this will lead toward a one-party government.&quot; That, I don't believe. I have got the utmost faith in the long-term common sense of the American people. Therefore, I don't think there should be any inhibitions other than those that were in the 35-year age limit and so on. I think that was enough, myself.
**Answer to question seeking his views on limiting U.S. presidents to two terms, news conference, Washington, D.C. (October 5, 1956), in ''Public Papers of the Presidents of the United States: Dwight D. Eisenhower, 1956'', p. 862.

* '''The peace we seek and need means much more than mere absence of war. It means the acceptance of law, and the fostering of justice, in all the world.'''
** Radio and Television Report to the American People on the Developments in Eastern Europe and the Middle East (October 31, 1956). Source: Eisenhower Presidential Library. [https://web.archive.org/web/20210125121539/https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes Archived] from the [https://www.eisenhowerlibrary.gov/eisenhowers/quotes original] on January 25, 2021.

*It is unwise to make education too cheap. If everything is provided freely, there is a tendency to put no value on anything. [[Education in the United States|Education]] must always have a certain price on it; even as the very process of learning itself must always require individual effort and initiative.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html Address at the Centennial Celebration Banquet of the National Education Association] (4 April 1957)

* I will continue to strive and struggle to apply what I think are conservative principles to the modern problems that we have so that not only in our legislative and governmental processes, but so far as I can help bring it about in our thinking processes, we will come to see the benefit of what I call the middle of-the-road Government. I realize that anybody that is trying to travel a middle road in any such thing as a great political process of the United States is attacked from both sides. I expect that, and if it were not so, I would think I were wrong. But I still believe that the adherence to conservative; principles in the finances of the Government, in the relationship of the Government to the individual, to the State and to the locality, at the same time recognizing the needs of a great and growing population beset with all kinds of problems that were unknown to our ancestors, do demand different actions on the part of Government than were so in the past. Now that is what I am trying to do, and I will keep trying.
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728417.1957.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1957 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1957, The President’s News Conference of September 3, 1957, P.644-645]

* '''I tell this story to illustrate the truth of the statement I heard long ago in the Army: ''[[Plans]] are worthless, but planning is everything.''''' There is a very great distinction because when you are planning for an emergency you must start with this one thing: '''the very definition of &quot;emergency&quot; is that it is unexpected, therefore it is not going to happen the way you are planning.'''
** From a speech to the National Defense Executive Reserve Conference in Washington, D.C. (November 14, 1957) ; in ''Public Papers of the Presidents of the United States, Dwight D. Eisenhower, 1957'',  National Archives and Records Service, Government Printing Office, p. 818 : &lt;small&gt; {{ISBN|0160588510}}, 9780160588518 &lt;/small&gt; 

*You just can't have this kind of war. There aren't enough bulldozers to scrape the bodies off the streets.
**In 1957, as quoted in [https://books.google.com/books?id=Y_klAgAAQBAJ&amp;pg=PA91&amp;lpg=PA91&amp;dq=%22there+aren%27t+enough+bulldozers+to+scrape+the+bodies+off+the+streets%22&amp;source=bl&amp;ots=g2f8x1zwaq&amp;sig=JxpjSjWSWqsTKHpxnfAjjmW2ibU&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=0CCoQ6AEwAmoVChMI6cCQsa6SxgIVAWitCh3TUwty#v=onepage&amp;q=%22there%20aren't%20enough%20bulldozers%20to%20scrape%20the%20bodies%20off%20the%20streets%22&amp;f=false ''No Use: Nuclear Weapons and U.S. National Security''], by Thomas M. Nichols.

* '''[[Importance|What counts]] is not [[necessarily]] the size of the [[dog]] in the [[fight]] — it's the [[Determination|size of the fight in the dog]].'''
** [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/index.php?pid=11229 Remarks at Republican National Committee Breakfast (31 January 1958)]; Eisenhower here delivers his particular variation of a pre-existing proverb, which has since become widely dispersed as simply &quot;'''It's not the size of the dog in the fight; it's the size of the fight in the dog.'''&quot; In that form it has become widely attributed to [[Mark Twain]] on the internet, as early as 1998, but no contemporary evidence of Twain ever using it has been located. The earliest known variants of it occur in 1911, one in a collection of sayings &quot;Stub Ends of Thoughts&quot; by Arthur G. Lewis, in ''Book of the Royal Blue'' Vol. 14, No. 7 (April 1911): &quot;'''It is not the size of the dog in the fight that counts, but the fight in the dog that matters'''&quot;, as cited in ''The Dictionary of Modern Proverbs'', edited by Charles Clay Doyle, Wolfgang Mieder, and Fred R. Shapiro, p. 232, and the other as &quot;'''It is not the size of the dog in the fight that counts, but the fight in the dog that wins'''&quot; in [http://listserv.linguistlist.org/pipermail/ads-l/2015-October/139250.html the evening edition of the ''East Oregonian'' (20 April 1911)]

*I do not believe that all of these problems can be solved just by a new law, or something that someone says, with teeth in it. For example, when we got into the [[w:Little Rock Nine|Little Rock thing]], it was not my province to talk about segregation or desegregation. I had the job of supporting a federal court that had issued a proper order under the Constitution, and where compliance was prevented by action that was unlawful.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html Presidential news conference] (26 March 1958)

*If civilization is to survive, it must choose the [[rule of law]].
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/speeches/address_convention_hall.pdf Presidential Statement on the Observation of Law Day] (30 April 1958)

*We believe in the principle that [[Government|governments]] are properly established only when it is with the consent of the governed.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/speeches/address_convention_hall.pdf Remarks to American Field Service Students] (15 July 1958)

* Q. Edward T. Folliard, Washington Post: Mr. President, I'd like to go back to Mr. Smith's question, but quote what you said in Los Angeles. After saying that the Democratic Party was dominated by political radicals, you said, &quot;Either we choose leftwing government or sensible government, spendthrift government or responsible government.&quot;
THE PRESIDENT. I said the dominant wing of the Democratic Party. 
Q. Mr. Folliard: Yes. Mr. President, do you think that the people yesterday chose leftwing government rather than sensible government?
THE PRESIDENT. I think at least this: I don't know whether they did this thing deliberately. I know this, that they obviously voted for people that I would class among the spenders, and that is what I say is going to be the real trouble. And I promise this: for the next 2 years, the Lord sparing me, I am going to fight this as hard as I know how. And if we; don't, I just say that-well, in the long run, everybody else that is responsible has got to fight it. The conservative Democrats, the newspapers, every kind of person that has got the brains to see what is happening to this country with our loose handling of our fiscal affairs has got to fight it.
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728421.1958.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1958 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1958, The President’s News Conference of November 5, 1958, P.828]

* In order to be a leader a man must have followers. And to have followers, a man must have their confidence. Hence, '''the supreme quality for a leader is unquestionably [[integrity]].''' Without it, no real success is possible, no matter whether it is on a section gang, a football field, in an army, or in an office. If a man's associates find him guilty of being phony, if they find that he lacks forthright integrity, he will fail. His teachings and actions must square with each other. The first great need, therefore, is integrity and high [[purpose]].
** As quoted in ''Stories for Talks with Boys and Girls'' (1958) by J. A. Cheley, p. 106; this is the earliest publication of this yet located; also in ''Quote Unquote'' (1977), edited by Lloyd Cary, p. 177, and many later publications.
** Variant:  The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity. Without it, no real success is possible, no matter whether it is on a section gang, a football field, in an army, or in an office.
*** As quoted in ''The All-American Quote Book'' (1995), edited by Michael Reagan and Bob Phillips, p. 187; this is earliest incident of this variant yet located.

* Mr. Horer: Mr. President, as you; know, we have; many; questions here. I would like to shift, if you; please, sir, to a topic, a favorite of all of us-politics. You said; at a recent press conference that your political philosophy has not changed. Nevertheless, many people say you have drifted away from Modem Republicanism toward traditional Republican conservatism. Would you explain this, sir? 
THE PRESIDENT: I am always amused, sometimes frustrated, in my attempt to define terms that I have heard or have been coined. I happened once, I believe in '56, the fall of '56, to have; used the term &quot;Modem Republicanism.&quot; Because there was some question about that, I tried to define it, and I said as far as I am concerned, this is the application of Republican principles to modem problems and not to the problem of keeping the Union together, which was President Lincoln's great preoccupation. We are talking about the problems that we encounter today. I do not see any difference so far as I am concerned between Modern Republicanism or another term that I liked, Theodore Roosevelt's, which was &quot;Progressive Republicanism.&quot; I believe we should cling very, very firmly to the principles, to the vision, really, that our founders wrote into their great documents, and we should take those principles and apply them with problems of humans today. 
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728423.1959.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1959 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1959, Remarks and Discussion at the National Press Club. January 14, 1959, P.23]

* In many ways, from cutting budget, reducing expenses, keeping down, for example, in every field that I know, we have tried to be on the conservative, middle-of-the-road side. But that has not apparently been publicized sufficiently.
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728423.1959.001&amp;seq=5  Dwight D. Eisenhower 1959 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1 to December 31, 1959, The President’s News Conference of July 29, 1959, P.552]

* '''The United States strongly seeks a lasting agreement for the discontinuance of [[nuclear weapons]] tests.''' We believe that this would be an important step toward reduction of [[International relations|international tensions]] and would open the way to further agreement on substantial measures of [[disarmament]]. 
** [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/?pid=11709 Letter to Nikita Khrushchev] (13 April 1959, published 20 April 1959)

* '''I like to believe that people in the long run are going to do more to promote peace than our governments. Indeed, I think that people want peace so much that one of these days governments had better get out of the way and let them have it.'''
** TV talk with [[Harold Macmillan|Prime Minister Macmillan]] (31 August 1959)
** {{cite web
 | url = http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/ss1.htm
 | title = &quot;Selected Quotations&quot;
 | work = Eisenhower Archives
 | publisher = Eisenhower Library
 | accessdate = 2007-04-01
 | archiveurl = http://web.archive.org/web/20070208232736/http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/ss1.htm
 | archivedate = 2007-02-08
}}

* Now, I think that all of us should hold this one truth in mind: every Republican, everybody he reaches, every independent, every discerning Democrat should be appealed to on the basis that we are truly a middle of-the-road party and by that I don't mean just walking a wishy-washy path between right and wrong, not at all. The middle road is a kind of path that is always difficult to defend, or at least requires intelligent explanation to defend, because you get your attacks from both flanks. And no commander going into battle of; any kind likes to be compelled to fight on both flanks as he is trying to go forward, but that is exactly what a middle-of-the-roader has to do. But because so many people want to go exactly in that direction we have a tremendous strength in our party, and we must make it our business to explain what we mean by middle-of-the-road government. This is the courageous, the constructive path that all of us must take. We are deeply unified in our support of basic principles: our belief in stability in our financial structure, in our determination we must have fiscal responsibility, in our determination not to establish and operate a paternalistic sort of government where a man's initiative is almost taken away from him by force.
** [https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=miua.4728424.1960.001&amp;seq=5 Dwight D. Eisenhower 1960-61 : containing the public messages, speeches, and statements of the president, January 1, 1960, to January 20, 1961, Remarks at the Republican National Committee Breakfast, Chicago, Illinois. July 27, 1960, P.605]

* Oh, goddammit, we forgot the silent prayer.
** Remark at a cabinet meeting, as quoted in ''Since 1945 : Politics and Diplomacy in Recent American History'' (1979) by Robert A. Divine, p. 55 &lt;!-- also quoted in &quot;Eisenhower and the American Crusades&quot; by Herbert S. Parmet, revised edition of 1999, p. 176  --&gt;

* I do have one instruction for you, General. Do something about that damned football team.
**Said to [[w:William Westmoreland|William Westmoreland]] in 1960 when Westmoreland assumed the post of [[w:Superintendents of the United States Military Academy|Superintendent]] of [[w:West Point|West Point]].
** Cited in {{cite book
 | last = Atkinson
 | first = Rick
 | title = The Long Gray Line
 | edition = First Pocket Books printing
 | year = 1991
 | publisher = Simon &amp; Schuster
 | location = New York
 | id = {{ISBN|0-671-72674-9}}
 | pages = p. 79
 | chapter = Year of the Tiger
}}

*'''I believe that the United States as a government, if it is going to be true to its own founding documents, does have the job of working toward that time when there is no discrimination made on such inconsequential reason as race, color, or religion.'''
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html Presidential news conference] (13 May 1959)

====First Inaugural Address (1953)====
:&lt;small&gt;[[s:Dwight Eisenhower's First Inaugural Address|First Inaugural Address (20 January 1953)]]&lt;!-- http://www.yale.edu/lawweb/avalon/presiden/inaug/eisen1.htm --&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Fist Bump for Equality.png|thumb|Any man who seeks to deny equality among all his brothers betrays the spirit of the free and invites the mockery of the tyrant.]]
[[File:Cold War Map 1959.svg|thumb|The strength of all free peoples lies in unity; their danger, in discord.]]
[[File:Operation Castle - Romeo 001.jpg|thumb|Yet the promise of this life is imperiled by the very genius that has made it possible...Science seems ready to confer upon us, as its final gift, the power to erase human life from this planet.]]
[[File:Flag of the United States (1912-1959).svg|thumb|It is the firm duty of each of our free citizens and of every free citizen everywhere to place the cause of his country before the comfort, the convenience of himself.]]
[[File:RCMP_in_Kosovo.jpg|thumb|Conceiving the defense of freedom, like freedom itself, to be one and indivisible, we hold all continents and peoples in equal regard and honor. We reject any insinuation that one race or another, one people or another, is in any sense inferior or expendable.]]
[[File:Discurso funebre pericles.PNG|thumb|A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.]]
[[File:BrooklynBridge 11.jpg|thumb|Love of liberty means the guarding of every resource that makes freedom possible--from the sanctity of our families and the wealth of our soil to the genius of our scientists.]]

* This faith rules our whole way of life. It decrees that '''we, the people, elect leaders not to rule but to serve.''' It asserts that we have the right to choice of our own work and to the reward of our own toil. It inspires the initiative that makes our [[productivity]] the wonder of the world. And it warns that '''any man who seeks to deny equality among all his brothers betrays the spirit of the free and invites the mockery of the tyrant.''' 

* '''No free people can for long cling to any privilege or enjoy any safety in economic solitude. For all our own material might, even we need markets in the world for the surpluses of our farms and our factories. [[Equality|Equally]], we need for these same farms and factories vital materials and products of distant lands. This basic law of interdependence, so manifest in the commerce of peace, applies with thousand-fold intensity in the event of war.''' So we are persuaded by necessity and by belief that '''the strength of all free peoples lies in unity; their danger, in discord.'''

* Yet the promise of this life is imperiled by the very genius that has made it possible. Nations amass wealth. Labor sweats to create—and turns out devices to level not only mountains but also cities. '''Science seems ready to confer upon us, as its final gift, the power to erase human life from this planet.'''

* Abhorring war as a chosen way to balk the purposes of those who threaten us, we hold it to be the first task of [[statesmanship]] to develop the strength that will deter the forces of aggression and promote the conditions of peace. For, '''as it must be the supreme purpose of all free men, so it must be the dedication of their leaders, to save humanity from preying upon itself. In the light of this principle, we stand ready to engage with any and all others in joint effort to remove the causes of mutual fear and distrust among nations''', so as to make possible drastic reduction of armaments. '''The sole requisites for undertaking such effort are that—in their purpose—they be aimed logically and honestly toward secure peace for all; and that—in their result— they provide methods by which every participating nation will prove good faith in carrying out its pledge.'''

* '''Realizing that common sense and common decency alike dictate the futility of appeasement, we shall never try to placate an aggressor by the false and wicked bargain of trading [[honor]] for [[security]]. Americans, indeed all free men, remember that in the final choice a soldier's pack is not so heavy a burden as a prisoner's chains.'''

* '''It is the firm duty of each of our free citizens and of every free citizen everywhere to place the cause of his country before the comfort, the convenience of himself.'''

* Recognizing economic health as an indispensable basis of military strength and the free world's peace, we shall strive to foster everywhere, and to practice ourselves, policies that encourage productivity and profitable trade. For '''the impoverishment of any single people in the world means danger to the well-being of all other peoples.'''     

* '''Conceiving the defense of [[freedom]], like freedom itself, to be one and indivisible, we hold all continents and peoples in equal regard and honor. We reject any insinuation that one race or another, one people or another, is in any sense inferior or expendable.'''

* Respecting the [[United Nations]] as the living sign of all people's hope for peace, we shall strive to make it not merely an eloquent symbol but an effective force. And '''in our quest for an honorable peace, we shall neither compromise, nor tire, nor ever cease.''' 

* '''We must be ready to dare all for our country. For history does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid.''' We must acquire proficiency in defense and display stamina in purpose. We must be willing, individually and as a Nation, to accept whatever sacrifices may be required of us. '''A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.''' These basic precepts are not lofty abstractions, far removed from matters of daily living. They are laws of spiritual strength that generate and define our material strength. '''Patriotism means equipped forces and a prepared citizenry. Moral stamina means more energy and more productivity, on the farm and in the factory. Love of liberty means the guarding of every resource that makes freedom possible--from the sanctity of our families and the wealth of our soil to the genius of our scientists.'''

====Annual Message to Congress (1953)====
* I propose to use whatever authority exists in the office of the President to end segregation in the [[District of Columbia]], including the [[Federal government of the United States|Federal Government]], and any segregation in the [[United States Armed Forces|Armed Forces]].
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/quotes.html Annual Message to the Congress on the State of the Union] (2 February 1953)

====The Chance for Peace (1953)====
[[File:Nuclear artillery test Grable Event - Part of Operation Upshot-Knothole.jpg|thumb|right|Every [[gun]] that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a [[theft]] from those who [[hunger]] and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This [[world]] in arms is not spending [[money]] alone. It is spending the sweat of its [[laborers]], the [[genius]] of its [[scientists]], the [[hopes]] of its [[children]].]]
:&lt;small&gt;Speech to the American Society of Newspaper Editors [http://www.edchange.org/multicultural/speeches/ike_chance_for_peace.html &quot;The Chance for Peace&quot;] (16 April 1953)&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Rimpac battlegroup 2006.jpg|thumb|right|This conjunction of an immense military establishment and a large arms industry is new in the American [[experience]]. ... We recognize the imperative need for this development. Yet we must not fail to comprehend its grave implications.]]
[[File:Combined Task Force-150.jpg|thumb|right|We must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the [[w:military-industrial complex|military-industrial complex]]. The potential for the disastrous rise of misplaced [[power]] exists and will persist. We must never let the weight of this combination endanger our [[liberties]] or [[democratic]] processes.]]

* '''No [[people]] on [[earth]] can be held, as a people, to be an [[enemy]], for all [[humanity]] shares the common hunger for [[peace]] and fellowship and [[justice]]. ... No nation's security and well-being can be lastingly achieved in isolation but only in effective cooperation with fellow-nations.'''

* '''A nation's hope of lasting peace cannot be firmly based upon any race in armaments but rather upon just relations and honest understanding with all other nations.'''

* '''Every [[gun]] that is made, every [[w:Warship|warship]] launched, every [[w:Rocket|rocket]] fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who [[hunger]] and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.''' The cost of one modern [[w:Heavy_bomber|heavy bomber]] is this: a modern brick school in more than 30 cities. It is two [[w:Electric_power_plant|electric power plants]], each serving a town of 60,000 population. It is two fine, fully equipped [[Hospital|hospitals]]. It is some fifty miles of concrete pavement. We pay for a single [[w:Fighter_plane|fighter plane]] with a half million bushels of [[w:Wheat|wheat]]. We pay for a single [[w:Destroyer|destroyer]] with new [[Home|homes]] that could have housed more than 8,000 people. This is, I repeat, the best way of life to be found on the road the world has been taking. This is not a way of life at all, in any true sense. Under the cloud of threatening war, it is humanity hanging from a cross of iron. ... Is there no other way the world may live?

* The free world knows, out of the bitter wisdom of experience, that '''vigilance and sacrifice are the price of liberty.'''

* This we do know: '''a world that begins to witness the rebirth of trust among nations can find its way to a peace that is neither partial nor punitive. With all who will work in good faith toward such a peace, we are ready, with renewed resolve, to strive to redeem the near-lost hopes of our day.'''

* '''The details of such disarmament programs are manifestly critical and complex.''' Neither the United States nor any other nation can properly claim to possess a perfect, immutable formula. But the formula matters less than the faith -- the good faith without which no formula can work justly and effectively. '''The fruit of success in all these tasks would present the world with the greatest task, and the greatest opportunity, of all. It is this: the dedication of the energies, the resources, and the imaginations of all peaceful nations to a new kind of war. This would be a declared total war, not upon any human enemy but upon the brute forces of [[poverty]] and need. The peace we seek, founded upon decent trust and cooperative effort among nations, can be fortified, not by weapons of war but by wheat and by cotton, by milk and by wool, by meat and timber and rice.''' These are words that translate into every language on earth. These are the needs that challenge this world in arms.'''

* '''The hunger for peace is too great, the hour in history too late, for any government to mock men's hopes with mere words and promises and gestures. [...] There is, before all peoples, a precarious chance to turn the black tide of events. If we failed to strive to seize this chance, the judgment of future ages will be harsh and just. If we strive but fail and the world remains armed against itself, it at least would need be divided no longer in its clear knowledge of who has condemned humankind to this fate.'''

* '''The purpose of the United States, in stating these proposals, is simple.'''  [...] They aspire to this: '''the lifting, from the backs and from the hearts of men, of their burden of arms and of fears, so that they may find before them a golden age of freedom and of peace.'''

* These proposals spring, without ulterior motive or political passion, from our calm conviction that '''the hunger for peace is in the hearts of all people''' -- those of Russia and of China no less than of our own country. They conform to our firm faith that '''God created man to enjoy, not destroy, the fruits of the earth and of their own toil.'''

====Remarks at the United Negro College Fund luncheon (1953)====
:&lt;small&gt;[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/eisenhower_citizenship_quotations.pdf Remarks at the United Negro College Fund luncheon (19 May 1953)]&lt;/small&gt;

*'''I believe the only way to protect my own rights is to protect the rights of others.'''

* '''I believe as long as we allow conditions to exist that make for second-class citizens, we are making of ourselves less than first-class citizens.'''
====Speech to the B'nai B'rith (1953)====
:&lt;small&gt;[https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/remarks-upon-receiving-the-americas-democratic-legacy-award-bnai-brith-dinner-honor-the Remarks at a B'nai B'rith dinner in honor of the 40th anniversary of the Anti-Defamation League (23 November 1953), Mayflower Hotel, Washington, D.C.] &lt;/small&gt;

* We [[love]] [[America]]. &lt;br /&gt; Why are we [[proud]]? We are proud, first of all, because from the [[beginning]] of this [[nation]], a [[human|man]] can walk upright, no matter who he is, or who she is. He can walk upright and meet his [[friend]] — or his [[enemy]]; and he does not [[fear]] that because that enemy may be in a position of great [[power]] that he can be suddenly thrown in [[jail]] to rot there without charges and with no recourse to [[justice]]. We have the ''[[w:Habeas corpus|habeas corpus]]'' act and we [[respect]] it.

* I would not want to sit down this evening without urging one thing: if we are going to continue to be proud that we are Americans, there must be no weakening of the code by which we have lived; by the right to meet your accuser face to face, if you have one; by your right to go to the church or the synagogue or even the mosque of your own choosing; by your right to speak your mind and be protected in it.

* Ladies and gentlemen, the things that make us proud to be Americans are of the soul and of the spirit. They are not the jewels we wear, or the furs we buy, the houses we live in, the standard of living, even, that we have. All these things are wonderful to the esthetic and to the physical senses. &lt;br /&gt; But let us never forget that the deep things that are American are the soul and the spirit. The [[Statue of Liberty]] is not tired, and not because it is made of bronze. It is because no matter what happens, here the individual is dignified because he is created in the image of his God. Let us not forget it.

==== Atoms for Peace (1953)====
[[File:General_Dwight_Eisenhower_in_Warsaw,_1945.jpg|thumb|right|The gravity of the [[time]] is such that every new avenue of [[peace]], no matter how dimly discernible, should be explored.]]
[[File:W78_MK12A_RV_Minuteman_III_bus.jpg|thumb|right|The [[United States]] would seek more than the mere reduction or elimination of atomic materials for military purposes. It is not enough to take this [[weapon]] out of the hands of the soldiers. It must be put into the hands of those who will know how to strip its military casing and adapt it to the [[arts]] of [[peace]].]]
[[File:Castle_Romeo.jpg|thumb|right|Against the dark background of the [[atomic bomb]], the [[United States]] does not wish merely to present [[strength]], but also the [[desire]] and the [[hope]] for [[peace]].]]
:&lt;small&gt;Address before the General Assembly of the United Nations on Peaceful Uses of Atomic Energy [http://web.archive.org/web/20070524054513/http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/atoms.htm &quot;Atoms for Peace&quot;] (8 December 1953)&lt;/small&gt;

* I know that the American people share my deep belief that '''if a danger exists in the world, it is a danger shared by all; and equally, that if hope exists in the mind of one nation, that hope should be shared by all.'''

* '''I feel impelled to speak today in a [[language]] that in a sense is new'''--one which I, who have spent so much of my life in the military profession, would have preferred never to use. '''That new language is the language of atomic warfare. The atomic age has moved forward at such a pace that every citizen of the world should have some comprehension, at least in comparative terms, of the extent of this development of the utmost significance to every one of us. Clearly, if the people of the world are to conduct an intelligent search for peace, they must be armed with the significant facts of today's existence.'''

* The free world, at least dimly aware of these facts, has naturally embarked on a large program of warning and defense systems. That program will be accelerated and extended. But '''let no one think that the expenditure of vast sums for [[Weapon|weapons]] and systems of defense can guarantee absolute safety for the cities and citizens of any nation.''' The awful [[arithmetic]] of the atomic bomb does not permit of any such easy solution. Even against the most powerful defense, an aggressor in possession of the effective minimum number of atomic bombs for a surprise attack could probably place a sufficient number of his bombs on the chosen targets to cause hideous damage.

* Occasional pages of history do record the faces of the &quot;Great Destroyers&quot; but '''the whole book of [[history]] reveals mankind's never-ending quest for peace''', and mankind's God-given capacity to build. '''It is with the book of history, and not with isolated pages, that the United States will ever wish to be identified. My country wants to be constructive, not destructive. It wants agreement, not wars, among nations. It wants itself to live in freedom, and in the confidence that the people of every other nation enjoy equally the right of choosing their own way of life. So my country's purpose is to help us move out of the dark chamber of horrors into the light, to find a way by which the minds of men, the hopes of men, the souls of men every where, can move forward toward peace and happiness and well being.'''

* '''The gravity of the time is such that every new avenue of peace, no matter how dimly discernible, should be explored.'''

* '''The United States would seek more than the mere reduction or elimination of atomic materials for military purposes. It is not enough to take this weapon out of the hands of the soldiers. It must be put into the hands of those who will know how to strip its military casing and adapt it to the arts of peace.'''

* The governments principally involved, to the extent permitted by elementary prudence, should begin now and continue to make joint contributions from their stockpiles of normal [[w:Uranium|uranium]] and fissionable materials to an [[w:International_Atomic_Energy_Agency|international atomic energy agency]]. We would expect that such an agency would be set up under the aegis of the United Nations. [...] The atomic energy agency could be made responsible for the impounding, storage and protection of the contributed fissionable and other materials. The ingenuity of our scientists will provide special safe conditions under which such a bank of fissionable material can be made essentially immune to surprise seizure. The more important responsibility of this atomic energy agency would be to devise methods whereby this fissionable material would be allocated to serve the peaceful pursuits of mankind. Experts would be mobilized to apply [[Nuclear power|atomic energy]] to the needs of [[agriculture]], [[medicine]] and other peaceful activities. A special purpose would be to provide abundant electrical energy in the power-starved areas of the world.
** Eisenhowers proposal for the establishment of the [[w:International Atomic Energy Agency|International Atomic Energy Agency]]

* I would be prepared to submit to the [[United States Congress|Congress of the United States]], and with every expectation of approval, any such plan that would, first, encourage world-wide investigation into the most effective peacetime uses of fissionable material, and with the certainty that the investigators had all the material needed for the conducting of all experiments that were appropriate; second, begin to diminish the potential destructive power of the world's atomic stockpiles; third, allow all peoples of all nations to see that, in this enlightened age, the great Powers of the earth, both of the East and of the West, are interested in human aspirations first rather than in building up the armaments of war; fourth, open up a new channel for peaceful discussion and initiative at least a new approach to the many difficult problems that must be solved in both private and public conversations if the world is to shake off the inertia imposed by fear and is to make positive progress towards peace.

* '''Against the dark background of the atomic bomb, the United States does not wish merely to present strength, but also the desire and the hope for peace.''' The coming months will be fraught with fateful decisions. In this Assembly; in the capitals and military headquarters of the world; in the hearts of men every where, be they governors, or governed, may they be decisions which will lead this work out of fear and into peace. To the making of these fateful decisions, '''the United States pledges''' before you--and therefore before the world--'''its determination to help solve the fearful atomic dilemma--to devote its entire heart and mind to find the way by which the miraculous inventiveness of man shall not be dedicated to his death, but consecrated to his life.'''

====Address at the Philadelphia Convention Hall (1956)====
:&lt;small&gt;[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/speeches/address_convention_hall.pdf Address at the Philadelphia Convention Hall] (1 November 1956).&lt;/small&gt;
*Our time of national political debate is almost ended. The clamor of these days will soon subside. And your day of thoughtful decision swiftly nears.

*All the historic precedents, the soaring graphs, the staggering statistics—these measure size more than substance. And the largeness and greatness of our nation would be almost a mockery—without a matching greatness of heart and largeness of vision as we look out upon the world.

*Of these greater things I speak to you tonight. It seems to me right to do so here, in [[Philadelphia]], where our forefathers defined the principles by which our nation was born and has ever lived.

*In such a world—at such a time---&quot;a decent respect for the opinion of mankind&quot;—in the words of our [[United States Declaration of Independence|Declaration of Independence]]—requires that we state plainly the purposes we seek, the principles we hold.

*In June of 1776, [[Richard Henry Lee]], rising before the [[w:Continental Congress|Continental Congress]] to move his resolution for American independence, declared: &quot;The eyes of Europe are fixed upon us; she demands of us a living example of freedom.&quot;

*One hundred eighty years later, we know that the eyes of the world are fixed upon us. And we must ask ourselves: what kind of an example of freedom do we give to our age? What are the true marks of our America—and what do they mean to the world?

*'''We are a people born of many peoples'''. Our culture, our skills, our very aspirations have been shaped by immigrants—and their sons and daughters—from all the earth. [[Samuel Gompers|Sam Gompers]] from [[England]], [[Andrew Carnegie]] from [[Scotland]], [[Albert Einstein]] from [[Germany]]—and [[Booker T. Washington]] and [[w:Al_Smith|Al Smith]]—[[Guglielmo Marconi|Marconi]] and [[w:Enrico_Caruso|Caruso]]—'''men of all [[nations]] and [[Race|races]] and [[Social class|estates]]—they have made us what we are'''.

*Men like these—men by the millions—have deepened and defined our very understanding of what is true and just in the wide world from which they came. We know—as our forefathers knew—the firm ground on which our beliefs must stand. Freedom is rooted in the certainty that the brotherhood of all men springs from the Fatherhood of God. And thus, even as each man is his brother's keeper, no man is another's master.

*So it is that the laws most binding us as a people are laws of the spirit—proclaimed in [[church]] and [[synagogue]] and [[mosque]]. '''These are the laws that truly declare the eternal [[equality]] of all men, of all races, before the man-made laws of our land'''. And we are profoundly aware that—in the world—we can claim the trust of hundreds of millions of people, across [[Africa]] and [[Asia]]—only as we ourselves hold high the banner of justice for all.

*We are—proudly—a people with no sense of class or caste. We judge no man by his name or inheritance, but by what he does—and for what he stands.

*The right of no nation depends upon the date of its birth or the size of its power. '''As there can be no second class citizens before the law of America, so—we believe—there can be no second-class nations before the law of the world community.'''

*We –finally—look upon change, the every-unfolding future, with confidence rather than doubt, hope rather than fear. We, as a people, were born of revolution. And we have lived by change—always a frontier people, exploring—if not new wilderness—then new science and new knowledge.

====Letter from April 4, 1956 to Richard L. Simon====

* I have spent my life in the study of military strength as a deterrent to war, and in the character of military armaments necessary to win a war. The study of the first of these questions is still profitable, but we are rapidly getting to the point that no war can be won. War implies a contest; when you get to the point that contest is no longer involved and the outlook comes close to destruction of the enemy and suicide for ourselves—an outlook that neither side can ignore—then arguments as to the exact amount of available strength as compared to somebody else's are no longer the vital issues. '''When we get to the point, as we one day will, that both sides know that in any outbreak of general hostilities, regardless of the element of surprise, destruction will be both reciprocal and complete, possibly we will have sense enough to meet at the conference table with the understanding that the era of armaments has ended and the human race must conform its actions to this truth or die.'''
** [https://www.nytimes.com/1983/09/08/opinion/abroad-at-home-if-it-were-eisenhower.html Letter from April 4, 1956 to Richard L. Simon]

====Second Inaugural Address (1957)====
:&lt;small&gt;[[s:Dwight Eisenhower's Second Inaugural Address|Second Inaugural Address (21 January 1957)]]&lt;!-- http://www.yale.edu/lawweb/avalon/presiden/inaug/eisen2.htm --&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
* '''We look upon this shaken [[Earth]], and we declare our firm and fixed purpose — the building of a peace with [[justice]] in a world where moral law prevails. The building of such a peace is a bold and solemn purpose. To proclaim it is easy. To serve it will be hard. And to attain it, we must be aware of its full meaning — and ready to pay its full price.''' We know clearly what we seek, and why. We seek peace, knowing that peace is the climate of freedom. And now, as in no other age, we seek it because we have been warned, by the power of modern weapons, that peace may be the only climate possible for human life itself. Yet this peace we seek cannot be born of fear alone: it must be rooted in the lives of nations. '''There must be justice, sensed and shared by all peoples, for, without justice the world can know only a tense and unstable truce. There must be law, steadily invoked and respected by all nations, for without law, the world promises only such meager justice as the pity of the strong upon the weak. But the law of which we speak, comprehending the values of freedom, affirms the equality of all nations, great and small. Splendid as can be the blessings of such a peace, high will be its cost: in toil patiently sustained, in help honorably given, in sacrifice calmly borne.'''

* '''May the light of freedom, coming to all darkened lands, flame brightly — until at last the darkness is no more. May the turbulence of our age yield to a true time of peace, when men and nations shall share a life that honors the dignity of each, the brotherhood of all.'''

====Address to the American People on the Situation in Little Rock (1957)====
:&lt;small&gt;[https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/radio-and-television-address-the-american-people-the-situation-little-rock Address to the American People on the Situation in Little Rock (24 September 1957)]&lt;/small&gt;
* '''Mob rule cannot be allowed to override the decisions of our courts.'''
* '''A foundation of our American way of life is our national respect for law.'''
* It was my hope that this localized situation would be brought under control by city and State authorities. If the use of local police powers had been sufficient, our traditional method of leaving the problems in those hands would have been pursued. '''But when large gatherings of obstructionists made it impossible for the decrees of the Court to be carried out, both the law and the national interest demanded that the President take action.'''

====Remarks on the Observation of Law Day (1958)====
:&lt;small&gt;[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/speeches/address_convention_hall.pdf Remarks on the Observation of Law Day (30 April 1958)]&lt;/small&gt;

*Freedom under law is like the air we breathe.

* '''It is only as we govern ourselves that we are well-governed.'''

==== from [https://www.wikidata.org/wiki/Q108182844 Jim Newton (2011) Eisenhower: The White House Years (Doubleday)] ====
* During one meeting, when a top Eisenhower economic advisor droned on about what it would take to reconstruct the dollar in the aftermath of a nuclear war, Eisenhower interrupted, &quot;Wait a minute, boys.  We're not going to be reconstructing the dollar.  We're going to be grubbing for worms.&quot;&lt;ref&gt;Newton (2011) p. 261.  Citation (p. 299):  {{w|John Eisenhower}}, interview with Newton, Oct. 7, 2010.  On p. 261 this followed a comment that, &quot;Total war,&quot; American planners had acknowledged by the end of 1956, &quot;could bring about such extensive destruction as to threaten the survival of both Western civilization and the Soviet system.&quot;&lt;/ref&gt;

* Contemplating the cost of modern war, Ike exclaimed one day: &quot;You might as well go out and shoot everyone you see then shoot yourself.&quot;&lt;ref&gt;Newton (2011) p. 261.  Citation (p. 299):  Ann Whitman, March 5, 1959, entry, March 1959 (2) folder, box 10 ACW Diary Series, Whitman File.&lt;/ref&gt;

===1960s===
[[File:General Omar Bradley, General Dwight Eisenhower, and General George Patton, all graduates of West Point, survey war damage in Bastogne, Belgium. 1944-1945.jpg|thumb|right|In preparing for [[battle]], I have always found that plans are useless but planning is indispensable.]]
[[File:AtomicEffects-Hiroshima.jpg|thumb|right|The [[Japanese]] were ready to surrender, and it wasn't [[necessary]] to hit them with that awful thing. ... I [[hated]] to see our country be the first to use such a [[weapon]].]]
[[File:Eisenhower 62-2-1USN.JPG|thumb|right|I share the sense of shock and dismay that the entire [[nation]] must [[feel]] at the despicable act that took the [[life]] of the nation's president.]]
[[File:General of the Army Dwight D. Eisenhower 1947.jpg|thumb|right|[[Leadership]] consists of [[nothing]] but taking [[responsibility]] for everything that goes [[wrong]] and giving your subordinates credit for everything that goes well.]]
* '''In preparing for battle, I have always found that plans are useless but planning is indispensable.'''
** Quoted in ''Six Crises'' (1962) by [[Richard Nixon]], and [http://www.bartleby.com/66/11/18611.html Quotation number 18611 in ''The Columbia World of Quotations'']

*We are deeply unified in our support of basic principles: our belief in stability in our financial structure, in our determination we must have [[w:Fiscal_responsibility|fiscal responsibility]], in our determination not to establish and operate a paternalistic sort of government where a man's initiative is almost taken away from him by force. Only in the last few weeks, I have been reading quite an article on the experiment of almost complete [[Paternalistic conservatism|paternalism]] in a friendly [[Europe|European]] country. This country has a tremendous record for [[Socialism|socialistic]] operation, following a socialistic philosophy, and the record shows that their rate of suicide has gone up almost unbelievably and I think they were almost the lowest nation in the world for that. Now, they have more than twice our rate. Drunkenness has gone up. Lack of ambition is discernible on all sides.. Therefore, with that kind of example, let's always remember Lincoln's admonition. Let's do in the federal Government only those things that people themselves cannot do at all, or cannot so well do in their individual capacities. Now, my friends, I know that these words have been repeated to you time and time again until you're tired of them. But I ask you only this, to contemplate them and remember this--Lincoln added another sentence to that statement. He said that in all those things where the individual can solve his own problems the Government ought not to interfere, for all are domestic affairs and this comprehends the things that the individual is normally concerned with, because [[Foreign policy of the United States|foreign affairs]] does belong to the President by the Constitution--and they are things that really require constant governmental action.
** [http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/?pid=11891#ixzz1fU73Watz July 27, 1960 Remarks at the Republican National Committee Breakfast, Morrison Hotel, Chicago, Illinois]

*The Founders conceived government as the servant, not the master of the individual.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/speeches/address_convention_hall.pdf Remarks to the Los Angeles Chamber of Commerce] (31 January 1962)

* Secretary of War [[Henry L. Stimson|Stimson]], visiting my headquarters in [[Germany]], informed me that our government was preparing to drop an atomic bomb on [[Japan during World War II|Japan]]. I was one of those who felt that there were a number of cogent reasons to question the wisdom of such an act. ...the Secretary, upon giving me the news of the successful bomb test in [[w:New_Mexico|New Mexico]], and of the plan for using it, asked for my reaction, apparently expecting a vigorous assent. &lt;br&gt;During his recitation of the [[relevant]] facts, I had been conscious of a feeling of [[depression]] and so I voiced to him my grave misgivings, first on the basis of my belief that Japan was already defeated and that dropping the bomb was completely unnecessary, and secondly because I thought that our country should avoid shocking world opinion by the use of a weapon whose employment was, I thought, no longer mandatory as a measure to save American lives. It was my belief that Japan was, at that very moment, seeking some way to surrender with a minimum loss of 'face'. The Secretary was deeply perturbed by my attitude...
** ''The White House Years: Mandate for Change: 1953–1956: A Personal Account'' (1963), pp. 312-313

* I am convinced that the [[French Colonial Empire|French]] could not win the war because the internal political situation in [[Vietnam]], weak and confused, badly weakened their military position. I have never talked or corresponded with a person knowledgeable in Indochinese affairs who did not agree that had elections been held as of the time of the fighting, possibly 80 per cent of the population would have voted for the [[Communism|Communist]] [[Ho Chí Minh|Ho Chi Minh]] as their leader rather than Chief of State [[w:Bao Dai|Bao Dai]]. Indeed, the lack of leadership and drive on the part of Bao Dai was a factor in the feeling prevalent among Vietnamese that they had nothing to fight for. As one Frenchman said to me, &quot;What Vietnam needs is another [[w:Syngman Rhee|Syngman Rhee]], regardless of all the difficulties the presence of such a personality would entail.
** ''The White House Years: Mandate for Change: 1953–1956: A Personal Account'' (1963); [http://www.chss.montclair.edu/english/furr/ike1.html longer passage] quoted at Montclair State University

* '''Un-American activity cannot be prevented or routed out by employing un-American methods; to preserve freedom we must use the tools that freedom provides.'''
**As quoted in ''The White House Years: Mandate for Change: 1953–1956: A Personal Account'' (1963), p. 331
* '''It was generally conceded that had an election been held, [[Ho Chi Minh]] would have been elected Premier.'''
**As quoted in ''The White House Years: Mandate for Change: 1953–1956: A Personal Account'' (1963), pp. 337-38

* '''I was against it on two counts. First, the [[Japan|Japanese]] were ready to surrender, and it wasn't necessary to hit them with that awful thing. Second, I hated to see our country be the first to use such a weapon.'''
** On his stated opposition to the use of the atomic bomb against the Japanese at the end of World War II, as quoted in ''Newsweek'' (11 November 1963), p. 107

* I share the sense of shock and dismay that the entire nation must feel at the despicable act that took the life of the nation's president.  On the personal side, Mrs. Eisenhower and I share the grief that Mrs. [[Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis|Kennedy]] must now feel.  We send to her our prayerful thoughts and sympathetic sentiments in this hour.
** [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KyGzVQGgdqw Televised statement upon the assassination of President John F. Kennedy], (22 November 1963)

*The government in Washington belongs to you.
**[http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/education/bsa/citizenship_merit_badge/speeches/address_convention_hall.pdf Remarks to the National Industrial Conference Board] (20 May 1965)

* '''One circumstance that helped our character development: we were needed.''' I often think today of what an impact could be made if children believed they were contributing to a family's essential survival and happiness. '''In the transformation from a rural to an urban society, children are — though they might not agree — robbed of the opportunity to do genuinely responsible work.'''
** ''At Ease: Stories I Tell to Friends'' (1967); also quoted in ''Childhood Revisited'' (1974) by Joel I. Milgram and Dorothy June Sciarra, p. 90

* '''Character in many ways is everything in leadership. It is made up of many things, but I would say character is really integrity.''' When you delegate something to a subordinate, for example, it is absolutely your responsibility, and he must understand this. You as a leader must take complete responsibility for what the subordinate does. I once said, as a sort of wisecrack, that '''leadership consists of nothing but taking responsibility for everything that goes wrong and giving your subordinates credit for everything that goes well'''.
** As quoted in ''Nineteen Stars : a Study in Military Character and Leadership'' (1971) by Edgar F. Puryear Jr., p. 289

*'''We are so proud of our guarantees of freedom in thought and speech and worship, that, unconsciously, we are guilty of one of the greatest errors that ignorance can make — we assume our standard of values is shared by all other humans in the world.'''
** As quoted in ''Strategies of Containment : A Critical Appraisal of Post-war American National Security Policy'' (1982) by John Lewis Gaddis

* It is my personal conviction that almost any one of the newborn states of the world would far rather embrace Communism or any other form of dictatorship than acknowledge the political domination of another government, even though that brought to each citizen a far higher standard of living.
** As quoted in ''Eisenhower and the Suez Crisis of 1956'' (1995) by Cole C. Kingseed, p. 27

* [James R. Killian] saw Eisenhower a few months before his death. The former President asked about &quot;my scientists&quot; and said, &quot;You know, Jim, this bunch of scientists was one of the few groups that I encountered in Washington who seemed to be there to help the country and not themselves.&quot;
** Quoted in ''Rabi, Scientist and Citizen'' (2000) by John S. Rigden, p. 251&lt;br /&gt;
==== Farewell address (1961) ====
[[File:Face_paint_girls.jpg|thumb|right|We cannot mortgage the material assets of our grandchildren without risking the loss also of their [[political]] and [[spiritual]] heritage.]]
[[File:The Earth seen from Apollo 17.jpg|thumb|right|This [[world]] of ours, ever growing smaller, must avoid becoming a community of dreadful [[fear]] and [[hate]], and be, instead, a proud confederation of mutual [[trust]] and [[respect]].]]
:&lt;small&gt; [[s:Eisenhower's farewell address|Farewell address (17 January 1961)]]&lt;/small&gt;

* We now stand ten years past the midpoint of a century that has witnessed four major wars among great nations. Three of these involved our own country. Despite these holocausts, America is today the strongest, the most influential, and most productive nation in the world. Understandably proud of this pre-eminence, we yet realize that '''America's leadership and prestige depend, not merely upon our unmatched material progress, riches and military strength, but on how we use our power in the interests of world peace and human betterment.'''

* '''Throughout America's adventure in free government, our basic purposes have been to keep the peace, to foster progress in human achievement, and to enhance liberty, dignity and integrity among peoples and among nations. To strive for less would be unworthy of a free and religious people.''' Any failure traceable to arrogance or our lack of comprehension or readiness to sacrifice would inflict upon us grievous hurt, both at home and abroad.

* Crises there will continue to be. In meeting them, whether foreign or domestic, great or small, '''there is a recurring temptation to feel that some spectacular and costly action could become the miraculous solution to all current difficulties.''' A huge increase in newer elements of our defenses; development of unrealistic programs to cure every ill in agriculture; a dramatic expansion in basic and applied research -- these and many other possibilities, each possibly promising in itself, may be suggested as the only way to the road we wish to travel. '''But each proposal must be weighed in the light of a broader consideration: the need to maintain balance in and among national programs''', balance between the private and the public economy, balance between the cost and hoped for advantages, balance between the clearly necessary and the comfortably desirable, balance between our essential requirements as a nation and the duties imposed by the nation upon the individual, '''balance between actions of the moment and the national welfare of the future. Good judgment seeks balance and progress.''' Lack of it eventually finds imbalance and frustration.

* '''Now this conjunction of an immense military establishment and a large arms industry is new in the American experience.''' The total influence — economic, political, even spiritual — is felt in every city, every Statehouse, every office of the Federal government. '''We recognize the imperative need for this development. Yet we must not fail to comprehend its grave implications.''' Our toil, resources, and livelihood are all involved. So is the very structure of our society. &lt;br /&gt; '''In the councils of government, we must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the [[w:military-industrial complex|military-industrial complex]]. The potential for the disastrous rise of misplaced power exists and will persist. We must never let the weight of this combination endanger our liberties or democratic processes.''' We should take nothing for granted. '''Only an alert and knowledgeable citizenry can compel the proper meshing of the huge industrial and military machinery of defense with our peaceful methods and goals, so that security and liberty may prosper together.'''

* Akin to, and largely responsible for the sweeping changes in our industrial-military posture, has been the technological revolution during recent decades. In this revolution, research has become central, it also becomes more formalized, complex, and costly. A steadily increasing share is conducted for, by, or at the direction of, the Federal government. &lt;br /&gt; Today, the solitary inventor, tinkering in his shop, has been overshadowed by task forces of scientists in laboratories and testing fields. In the same fashion, '''the free [[Universities|university]], historically the fountainhead of free ideas and scientific discovery, has experienced a [[revolution]] in the conduct of [[research]]. Partly because of the huge costs involved, a government contract becomes virtually a substitute for intellectual curiosity.''' For every old blackboard there are now hundreds of new electronic [[computers]]. The prospect of domination of the nation's scholars by Federal employment, project allocations, and the power of money is ever present — and is gravely to be regarded. &lt;br /&gt; Yet, in holding scientific research and discovery in respect, as we should, we must also be alert to the equal and opposite danger that public policy could itself become the captive of a scientific-technological elite.

* As we peer into society's future, '''we -- you and I, and our government -- must avoid the impulse to live only for today, plundering for our own ease and convenience the precious resources of tomorrow. We cannot mortgage the material assets of our grandchildren without risking the loss also of their political and spiritual heritage. We want democracy to survive for all generations to come, not to become the insolvent phantom of tomorrow.&quot;

* During the long lane of the history yet to be written, America knows that '''this world of ours, ever growing smaller, must avoid becoming a community of dreadful fear and hate, and be, instead, a proud confederation of mutual trust and respect. Such a confederation must be one of equals. The weakest must come to the conference table with the same confidence as do we, protected as we are''' by our moral, economic, and military strength. '''That table, though scarred by many past frustrations, cannot be abandoned for the certain agony of the battlefield.'''

* Disarmament, with mutual honor and confidence, is a continuing imperative. Together '''we must learn how to compose differences, not with arms, but with intellect and decent purpose.'''

* We face a hostile ideology; global in scope, [[Nikita Khrushchev|atheistic in character]], ruthless in purpose and insidious in method. Unhappily the danger it poses promises to be of indefinite duration. To meet it successfully there is call for not so much the emotional and transitory sacrifices of questions but rather those which enable us to carry forward steadily, surely and without complaint the burdens of a prolonged and complex struggle with liberty the stake. Only thus shall we remain despite every provocation on our charted course towards permanent peace and human betterment.
{{Disputed begin}}

== Disputed ==
* Biggest damfool mistake I ever made.
** Referring to his appointment of [[Earl Warren]] as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court; reported in Fred Rodell, &quot;The Complexities of Mr. Justice Fortas&quot;, ''The New York Times Magazine'' (July 28, 1968), p. 12. William B. Ewald, Jr., research assistant for Eisenhower's memoirs, says in ''Eisenhower the President'', p. 95 (1981), &quot;I myself once, and once only, heard him say in Gettysburg in 1961, 'The two worst appointments I ever made came out of recommendations from the Justice Department: that fellow who headed the Antitrust Division, Bicks, and Earl Warren'&quot;.
* The visual evidence and the verbal testimony of starvation, cruelty and bestiality were so overpowering as to leave me a bit sick. In one room, where they [there] were piled up twenty or thirty naked men, killed by starvation, George Patton would not even enter. He said that he would get sick if he did so. '''I made the visit''' [to Gotha] '''deliberately, in order to be in a position to give first-hand evidence of these things if ever, in the future, there develops a tendency to charge these allegations merely to &quot;propaganda.&quot;'''
** According to [https://www.truthorfiction.com/did-dwight-eisenhower-say-someday-someone-will-claim-it-never-happened-in-1945/ TruthOrFiction.com], it was Eisenhower in a letter written by him. According to the [https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/george-marshall-letter-to-eisenhower-describing-visit-to-ohrdruf Jewish Virtual Library], it was written in a letter by General [[George Marshall]] ''to'' Eisenhower.
* Get it all on record now – get the films – get the witnesses – because somewhere down the track of history some bastard will get up and say that this never happened.
** According to [https://www.truthorfiction.com/did-dwight-eisenhower-say-someday-someone-will-claim-it-never-happened-in-1945/ TruthOrFiction.com], this sentence first appeared in a letter to the editor published on DominicanToday.com, accompanied with the words &quot;he did this because he said in words to this effect&quot;. It was probably a paraphrase of the above bold sentence.

{{Disputed end}}
{{Misattributed begin}}

== Misattributed ==
* The [[w:John Birch Society|John Birch Society]] is a good, patriotic society. I don't agree with what its founder said about me, but that does not detract from the fact that its membership is comprised of many fine Americans dedicated to the preservation of our libertarian Republic.
** Reported in an editorial in the ''Alton Evening Telegraph'' (July 14,1964), A-4; appeared in a display ad in the ''Los Angeles Times'' (September 27, 1964), D14. Reported as misattributed in Paul F. Boller, Jr., and John George, ''They Never Said It: A Book of Fake Quotes, Misquotes, &amp; Misleading Attributions'' (1989), p. 24, stating that an aide of Eisenhower's had denied that Eisenhower had made the remark.
{{Misattributed end}}

== Quotes to Eisenhower ==

=== From the Combined Chiefs of Staff ===

''This was Eisenhower's directive for [[w:Operation Overlord|Operation Overlord]] (D-Day) for entering Europe and defeating the Germans in World War II:''

From the Combined Chiefs of Staff, to Supreme Commander, Allied Expeditionary Force, on February 12, 1944:

&lt;!-- Not sure of the wikicode for this, but the original Directive has numbered points, of which these are #1 and #2. --&gt;
*# You are hereby designated as Supreme Allied Commander of the forces placed under your orders for operations for liberation of Europe from Germans. Your title will be Supreme Commander Allied Expeditionary Force.
*# Task. You will enter the continent of Europe and, in conjunction with the other United Nations, undertake operations aimed at the heart of Germany and the destruction of her armed forces. 
** quoted in: Forrest Pogue, U.S. Dept. of the Army Center of Military History (1989), ''The Supreme Command'', p. 53 &lt;!-- {{cite book |last1=Pogue |first1=Forrest C. |author2=United States Department of the Army Office of Military History |author3=Center of Military History |title=United States Army in World War II {{!}} The European Theater of Operations {{!}} The Supreme Command |date=1989 |orig-year=1st pub. 1954 |url=http://history.army.mil/html/books/007/7-1/CMH_Pub_7-1.pdf |series=United States Army in World War II., European theater of operations, CMH pub. 7-1 |page=53 |at=pdf:78 |chapter=II The Coalition Command |publisher=Center of Military History United States Army |location=Washington, D. C. |type=National government publication |format=pdf |isbn= |lccn=53-61717 |oclc=1013540453}} --&gt;

== Quotes about Eisenhower ==
[[File:Eisenhower official.jpg|thumb|By all accounts, Eisenhower was affable, gregarious, and a decent, honorable man who quietly [[inspired]] [[confidence]] and commanded [[respect]]. ~ William A. DeGregorio]]
[[File:I like Ike.jpg|thumb|Eisenhower was known as a [[harmonizer]], a man who could get [[diverse]] factions to [[work]] toward a common [[goal]]... ~  [[w:David Oshinsky|David M. Oshinsky]] ]]

*Sixty years after Eisenhower's [[w:Farewell Address|Farewell Address]], exactly as he predicted, the &quot;weight of this combination&quot; of corrupt generals and admirals, the profitable &quot;merchants of death&quot; whose goods they peddle, and the senators and representatives who blindly entrust them with trillions of dollars of the public's money constitute the full flowering of his greatest fears for our country.  Eisenhower concluded, &quot;Only an alert and knowledgeable citizenry can compel the proper meshing of the huge industrial and military machinery of defense with our peaceful methods and goals.&quot; That clarion call echoes through the decades and should unite Americans in every form of democratic organizing and movement building, from elections to education and advocacy to mass protests, to finally reject and dispel the &quot;unwarranted influence&quot; of the [[military-industrial complex|military-industrial-congressional complex]].
** [[Medea Benjamin]] and [https://www.salon.com/2021/12/07/congress-loots-the-treasury-for-us-machine--while-bickering-over-build-back-better/ Nicolas J.S. Davies, Congress loots the Treasury for U.S. war machine — while bickering over Build Back Better, ''Salon,''] (December 7, 2021) 

[[File:SHAEF Shoulder Patch.svg |thumb| His [[strength]] was his [[ability]] to achieve '[[good]] [[cooperation]]' from subordinates and allies alike. Such a [[talent]] was at a premium in preparing [[w:Operation Overlord|Overlord]]. ~ [[Richard Overy]] ]]
[[File:I Like Ike button, 1952.png|thumb|[[w:Draft Eisenhower movement|I LIKE IKE!]] ~ [[w:Peter G. Peterson|Peter George Peterson]]]]
&lt;!-- [[File:Eisenhower Dwight COA.svg|thumb|]] this file does not currently display properly at thumbnail size, but might be fixed eventually ~ Kalki 2015·03·20 --&gt;[[File:Coat of Arms of Dwight Eisenhower.svg|thumb|Dwight D. Eisenhower was a reluctant [[politician]]. ~ Andreas Wenger]]
[[File:Meeting of the Supreme Command.jpg|thumb|Eisenhower was reluctant to impose his [[ideas]], unless the [[decision]] was one which he, as Supreme Commander, [[Necessity|had to]] make. As a general rule, he tended to seek the [[opinions]] of all and to work out the best compromise. ~ [[w:Chester Wilmot|Chester Wilmot]] ]]

* Anti-Communism contributed to the conservative ethos of the 1950s, an ethos which was reflected in the Republican Eisenhower presidency of 1953–61, as well as in the [[Robert Menzies|Menzies]] administration in [[Australia]] (1949–66), and government by conservative parties in [[United Kingdom|Britain]] (1951–64), [[Japan]] (from the end of occupation in 1952 throughout the [[Cold War]]) and [[West Germany]] (1949–69). The Eisenhower presidency did not simply draw on this ethos. There was also a process of domestic [[propaganda]] to secure public support for what were presented as American values and to limit the development of attitudes that might be conducive for Communist propaganda. A sense of vulnerability was important to both government and public in America, and helped give force and commitment to American policy. If such a sense has been a characteristic of all American crises, that does not make the concern that developed and was encouraged from the late 1940s less notable. This concern was to be taken forward as a result of the [[Korean War]] (1950–3) in which the American army did not perform that well and was thwarted by Chinese intervention. The strategic situation in the 1950s was poor for the USA because of the Sino-Soviet alliance that followed [[Chinese Communist Party|Communist]] victory in the [[Chinese Civil War]]. The Eurasian land mass was overwhelmingly under the domain of the hostile other side. Once the Soviet Union and China publicly split in the 1960s, then the American strategic situation much improved.
** [[Jeremy Black (historian)|Jeremy Black]], ''The Cold War: A Military History'' (2015) 

* Eisenhower found as I did that the well-springs of humility lie in the field. For however arduous the task of a commander, he cannot face the men who shall live or die by his orders without sensing how much easier is his task than the one he has set them to perform. Throughout the war in Europe Eisenhower frequently escaped SHAEF to tramp into the field and talk to his men. There, like the others of us, he could see the war for what it was, a wretched debasement of all the thin pretenses of civilization. In the rear areas war may sometimes assume the mask of an adventure. On the front it seldom lapses far from what [[William Tecumseh Sherman|General Sherman]] [[Hell|declared it to be]].
** [[Omar Bradley|Omar N. Bradley]], ''A Soldier's Story'' (1951), p. 310-311

*I cannot, of course, commit myself to any particular details. Reports are coming in in rapid succession. So far the Commanders who are engaged report that everything is proceeding according to plan. And what a plan! This vast operation is undoubtedly the most complicated and difficult that has ever taken place. It involves tides, wind, waves, visibility, both from the air and the sea standpoint, and the combined employment of land, air and sea forces in the highest degree of intimacy and in contact with conditions which could not and cannot be fully foreseen. There are already hopes that actual tactical surprise has been attained, and we hope to furnish the enemy with a succession of surprises during the course of the fighting. The battle that has now begun will grow constantly in scale and in intensity for many weeks to come, and I shall not attempt to speculate upon its course. This I may say, however. Complete unity prevails throughout the Allied Armies. There is a brotherhood in arms between us and our friends of the United States. There is complete confidence in the supreme commander, General Eisenhower, and his lieutenants, and also in the commander of the Expeditionary Force, [[Bernard Montgomery, 1st Viscount Montgomery of Alamein|General Montgomery]]. The ardour and spirit of the troops, as I saw myself, embarking in these last few days was splendid to witness. Nothing that equipment, science or forethought could do has been neglected, and the whole process of opening this great new front will be pursued with the utmost resolution both by the commanders and by the [[Federal government of the United States|United States]] and [[Government of the United Kingdom|British Governments]] whom they serve.
**[[Winston Churchill]], [https://www.nationalchurchillmuseum.org/the-invasion-of-france.html Speech to the House of Commons on the Invasion of France], 6 June 1944

*The outstanding feature has been the landings of the airborne troops, which were on a scale far larger than anything that has been seen so far in the world. These landings took place with extremely little loss and with great accuracy. Particular [[anxiety]] attached to them, because the conditions of light prevailing in the very limited period of the dawn-just before the dawn-the conditions of visibility made all the difference. Indeed, there might have been something happening at the last minute which would have prevented airborne troops from playing their part. A very great degree of risk had to be taken in respect of the weather. But General Eisenhower's [[courage]] is equal to all the necessary decisions that have to be taken in these extremely difficult and uncontrollable matters. The airborne troops are well established, and the landings and the follow-ups are all proceeding with much less loss-very much less-than we expected. Fighting is in progress at various points. We captured various bridges which were of importance, and which were not blown up. There is even fighting proceeding in the town of Caen, inland. But all this, although a very valuable first step-a vital and essential first step-gives no indication of what may be the course of the battle in the next days and weeks, because the enemy will now probably endeavour to concentrate on this area, and in that event heavy fighting will soon begin and will continue without end, as we can push troops in and he can bring other troops up. It is, therefore, a most serious time that we enter upon. Thank God, we enter upon it with our great Allies all in good heart and all in good friendship.
**[[Winston Churchill]], [https://www.nationalchurchillmuseum.org/the-invasion-of-france.html Speech to the House of Commons on the Invasion of France], 6 June 1944

* By all accounts, Eisenhower was affable, gregarious, and a decent, honorable man who quietly inspired confidence and commanded respect. &quot;Eisenhower wanted to like people,&quot; biographer [[w:Peter Lyon|Peter Lyon]] has written, &quot;so he wanted people to like him; he was distressed when it failed to happen so. His need for a friendly rapport was one reason for his reluctance, so often marked by journalists, to speak ill of anyone.&quot; Another reason was a lesson learned in childhood: Angry because he was not allowed to go out on [[Halloween]] with the older boys, young Ike beat his knuckles bloody against a tree trunk. That night his mother nursed his hands and, in what he called one of the most valuable lessons of his life, explained how futile was the emotion of hatred. Thereafter, he sought to avoid hating or publicly bad-mouthing anyone. The famous Eisenhower smile reflected his generally sunny, optimistic disposition. At times he grew depressed or exploded in anger, but never for extended periods. A bit superstitious, he carried in his pocket three lucky coins, a [[w:dollar coin (United States)|silver dollar]], a [[w:Five guineas (British coin)|five-guinea gold piece]], and a [[w:French franc|French franc]]. Eisenhower was a rather poor speaker, notorious for his fractured syntax. Sometimes, however, he hid behind his reputation when he wanted to avoid responding directly to a question.
** William A. DeGregorio, ''The Complete Book of U.S. Presidents'' (1984), p. 528

* The new US president, Dwight David Eisenhower, was a veteran of two world wars, the architect of [[w:D-Day landings|D-Day]], and [[NATO]] supreme commander between 1950 and 1952; he came to office in 1953 promising a tougher stance toward the Soviet Union.
** Carole C. Fink, ''Cold War: An International History'' (2017), p. 90-91

* The Soviet Union hastened to endorse the [[w:Bandung Conference|Bandung]] principles, and the United States began to ease its hostility toward nonalignment (which Secretary of State [[John Foster Dulles]] had denounced as &quot;morally bankrupt&quot;), acknowledge the diminishing appeal of its security pacts, and court independent [[Third World]] governments. [[Vietnam]] was an exception. The Eisenhower administration, which had refused to sign the [[w:1954_Geneva_Accords|Geneva Accords]], feared a communist victory in the national elections and a domino effect throughout [[w:Southeast Asia|Southeast Asia]]. After the French withdrawal, the United States proceeded to build up a client state in the south, allowing President [[w:Ngô Đình Diệm|Ngô Đình Diệm]] to cancel the 1956 elections and to clamp down on his opponents. Contrary to the [[w:Geneva Accords (1955)|Geneva Accords]], which forbade the Vietnamese from entering foreign alliances or allowing foreign troops into Vietnam, Dulles mobilized the US-led [[w:Southeast Asia Treaty Organization|Southeast Asia Treaty Organization]] to agree to protect South Vietnam against communist aggression. When a popular insurgency, which Diệm contemptuously labeled [[w:Viet Cong|Viet Cong]] (Vietnamese communists) erupted in the south two years later and received support from the north, Eisenhower expanded US economic and military aid and personnel on the ground. Between 1955 and 1961 the United States poured more than $1 billion in economic and military aid into the Diệm regime, and by the time Eisenhower left office there were approximately one thousand US military advisers in South Vietnam.
** Carole C. Fink, ''Cold War: An International History'' (2017), p. 96-97

* Eisenhower idolized [[George Washington]] for his courage and daring, and for his brilliant speeches. He avidly studied accounts of Princeton, [[w:Battle of Trenton|Trenton]], and [[w:Valley Forge|Valley Forge]], and was amazed by what he deemed the stupidity of Washington's enemies, who campaigned for his removal as commander in chief of the Revolutionary Army. Eisenhower combined his extraordinary memory with his father's fascination with [[Greece]], and became so conversant with [[Ancient Greece|Greek]] and [[Roman Empire|Roman]] history that, until old age, he would instantly interrupt and correct anyone who failed to identify correctly a historical date or missed an element of an important battle or campaign. Among the ancients, Eisnehower's principal hero was [[Hannibal]], not only for his military daring but for his mastery of the logistics of his times. He marveled how Hannibal had managed to survive as a historical icon despite being portrayed badly by a legion of unfriendly [[Historian|historians]] and [[Biography|biographers]]. The &quot;black hats&quot; included [[Darius I of Persia|Darius]], [[Marcus Junius Brutus|Brutus]], [[Xerxes I|Xerxes]], and the evil [[Roman Empire|Roman emperor]] [[Nero]].
** Carlo D'Este, ''Eisenhower: A Soldier's Life'' (2002), p. 44-45

* In 1967 Eisenhower was visited at his Gettysburg home by former army chief of staff Gen. [[w:Harold K. Johnson|Harold K. Johnson]]. During their conversation Johnson said, &quot;[[Herodotus]] wrote about the [[w:Peloponnesian War|Peloponnesian War]] that one cannot be an armchair general twenty miles from the front.&quot; Afterward one of his former White House speechwriters, who had been present, asked Eisenhower if he knew the precise wording of the quote. He replied, &quot;First, it wasn't Herodotus but [[w:Aemilius_Paulanus|Aemilius Paulanus]]. Second, it was not the Peloponnesian War, but the Punic War with Carthage. And third, he misquoted.&quot; Asked why he didn't correct General Johnson, Eisenhower replied, &quot;I got where I did by knowing how to hide my [[ego]] and hide my [[intelligence]]. I knew the actual quote, but why should I embarrass him?&quot;
** Carlo D'Este, ''Eisenhower: A Soldier's Life'' (2002), p. 45

* Eisenhower did not participate in the final discussions leading to the demise of [[w:Operation_Sledgehammer|Sledgehammer]]. At their conclusion Marshall summoned Eisenhower to his suite in Claridge's. When Eisenhower arrived, the chief of staff was occupied in the bathroom, and their brief discussion took place through the door. In characteristic fashion [[George C. Marshall|Marshall]] announced that Eisenhower was being given the new title of deputy Allied commander in charge of planning for [[w:Operation_Torch|Torch]], and that both he and Admiral King were backing his appointment to command the entire operation. Temporarily in limbo as the commander of American forces, pending the president's approval, Eisenhower reflected on Napoleon's remarks that a general must not permit himself to be impatient or distracted in any manner that would weaken or interfere with the execution of a major plan. When the [[w:Combined Chiefs of Staff|Combined Chiefs of Staff]] met on July 25 and the subject of a commander for Torch was raised, the blunt-spoken [[Ernest King|Ernie King]] declared that the choice seemed obvious: &quot;Well, you've got him right here,&quot; he pointed out. &quot;Why not put it under Eisenhower?&quot; As he would later ascertain, Eisenhower once again had reason to regret his earlier criticism of King, who had become one of his strongest supporters.
** Carlo D'Este, ''Eisenhower: A Soldier's Life'' (2002), p. 336

* As I discovered in my command and control research in the late fifties, President Eisenhower had secretly delegated authority to initiate [[Nuclear war|nuclear attacks]] to his theater commanders under various circumstances, including the outage of [[Communication|communications]] with Washington (a daily occurrence in the Pacific) or a presidential incapacitation (which Eisenhower suffered twice). And with his authorization, they had in turn delegated this initiative, under comparable [[crisis]] conditions, to subordinate commanders. To my surprise, after I had alerted the Kennedy White House to this policy and its dangers, [[John F. Kennedy|President Kennedy]] continued it (rather than reverse the decision of the “great commander” who had preceded him). So did [[Lyndon B. Johnson|Presidents Johnson]], [[Richard Nixon|Nixon]], and [[Jimmy Carter|Carter]]. So, almost certainly, has every subsequent [[President of the United States|president]] to this day, even though in the past several decades there may have been at least nominal “devolution” to some civilian outside [[Washington, D.C.|Washington]]. This delegation has been one of our highest national secrets.
** [[Daniel Ellsberg]], ''The Doomsday Machine: Confessions from a Nuclear War Planner'' (2017) 
* This is senior Dwight David Eisenhower, gentlemen, the terrible [[Swedes|Swedish]]-[[Judaism|Jew]], as big as life and twice as natural. He claims to have the best authority for the statement that he is the handsomest man in the [[United States Marine Corps|Corps]] and is ready to back up his claim at any time. At any rate you'll have to give it to him that he is well-developed abdominally- and more graceful in pushing it around than Charles Calvert Benedict. In common with most fat men, he is an enthusiastic and sonorous devotee of the King of Indoor Sports, and roars homage at the shrine of Morpheus on every possible occasion. However, when the memory of man runneth back to the time when little Dwight was but a slender lad of some 'steen years, full of joy and energy and craving for life and movement and change. 'Twas then that the romantic appeal of [[United States Military Academy|West Point]]'s glamour grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and dragged him to his doom. Three weeks of Beast gave him his fill of life and movement and as all the change was locked up at the Cadet Store out of reach, poor Dwight merely consents to exist until graduation shall set him free. At one time he threatened to get interested in life and won his &quot;A&quot; by being the most promising back in Eastern [[American football|football]]- but the Tufts game broke his knee and the promise. Now Ike must content himself with tea, tiddledywinks and talk, at all of which he excels. Said prodigy will now lead us in a long, loud yell for- Dare Devil Dwight, the Dauntless Don.
** Description of Eisenhower in ''The Howitzer'' (1915), yearbook of the United States Military Academy, p. 80
*Now, I needn't remind you, or my fellow Americans regardless of party, that [[Republican Party (United States)|Republicans]] have shouldered this hard responsibility and marched in this cause before. It was Republican leadership under Dwight Eisenhower that kept the peace, and passed along to this administration the mightiest arsenal for defense the world has ever known. And I needn't remind you that it was the strength and the unbelievable will of the Eisenhower years that kept the peace by using our strength, by using it in the Formosa Straits and in [[Lebanon]] and by showing it courageously at all times. It was during those Republican years that the thrust of Communist imperialism was blunted. It was during those years of Republican leadership that this world moved closer, not to war, but closer to peace, than at any other time in the three decades just passed.
**[[Barry Goldwater]], 1964 Republican National Convention acceptance speech, (16 July 1964) 

*Eisenhower used to tell me that this place was a [[prison]]. I never felt freer.
**[[Lyndon B. Johnson]], as quoted in [http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/washingtonpost/doc/307079109.html?FMT=ABS&amp;FMTS=ABS:FT&amp;date=Nov+13%2C+1988&amp;author=Moyers%2C+Bill+D&amp;desc=What+a+Real+President+Was+Like%3B+To+Lyndon+Johnson%2C+the+Great+Society+Meant+Hope+and+Dignity &quot;What a Real President Was Like: To Lyndon Johnson, the Great Society Meant Hope and Dignity&quot;], by [[Bill Moyers]], ''The Washington Post'' (13 November 1988).
*Of Eisenhower's respect for Marshall there can be no doubt; he told Beetle Smith that he wouldn't trade Marshall for fifty [[Douglas MacArthur|MacArthurs]]. (&quot;My God,&quot; the thought came to him, &quot;that would be a lousy deal. What would I do with fifty MacArthurs?&quot;) Eisenhower wrote to a friend that Marshall was &quot;a great soldier... quick, tough, tireless and a real leader. He accepts responsibility automatically and never goes back on a subordinate.&quot; Eisenhower said that he had conceived &quot;unlimited admiration&quot; for Marshall because of the burden Marshall bore without complaint, being at the same time &quot;rather a remote and austere person.&quot; Eisenhower had been known in the Army as &quot;Ike&quot; since the day he entered [[United States Military Academy|West Point]], but Marshall (except on one occasion) always called him &quot;Eisenhower.&quot; The one exceptional lapse into &quot;Ike&quot; so embarrassed Marshall that Eisenhower said he used &quot;Eisenhower&quot; five times in the next sentence to make up for it.
**Eric Larrabee, ''Commander in Chief: Franklin Delano Roosevelt, His Lieutenants, and Their War'' (1987), p. 418

* This was a most unusual man, a veiled man, so seemingly forthright, so ready to volunteer his thoughts, yet in the end so secretive, so protective of his purposes and the hidden processes of an iron logic behind them. A reviewer of his published diaries commented on his &quot;closed, calculating quality&quot; and went on: &quot;Few who watched him carefully indulged the fantasy that he was a genial, open, barefoot boy from Abilene who just happened to be in the right place when the lightning struck.&quot; Another perceptive comment was made by the war correspondent [[w:Don Whitehead|Don Whitehead]], who covered the European theater and the invasion for the [[w:Associated Press|Associated Press]]. &quot;I have a feeling,&quot; Whitehead wrote years later, &quot;that he was a far more complicated man than he seemed to be- a man who shaped events with such subtlety that he left others thinking that they were the architects of those events. And he was satisfied to leave it that way.&quot; Eisenhower conveyed warmth but there was a chill inside him. An early sorrow, the death of his first son, had seared his emotional nerve endings. &quot;This was the greatest disappointment and disaster of my life,&quot; he wrote, &quot;the one I have never been able to forget completely. Today when I think of it, even now as I write it, the keenness of our loss comes back to me as fresh and terrible as it was that long dark day.&quot; He came to question whether attachment to another person was a luxury that could be afforded. In 1947, he was told of the crack-up over personal loss of a wartime associate and wrote in his diary: &quot;makes one wonder whether any human ever dares become so wrapped up in another that all happiness and desire to live is determined by the actions, desires- or life- of the second.&quot; The associate in question was Kay Summersby, his driver and secretary, to whom his himself appears to have become attached, and his words bear the mark of a steely will.
** Eric Larrabee, ''Commander in Chief: Franklin Delano Roosevelt, His Lieutenants, and Their War'' (1987), p. 418-419

* Eisenhower disliked excessively rhetorical flourishes because they betrayed a desire to be ingratiating, or overly persuasive, or too eager for promotion. Fox Conner had drilled him in the army mystique of never seeking or refusing an assignment, and Eisenhower always managed matters so that the assignments sought hum. His gift for being offered jobs he had not asked for would appear almost magical if one did not keep in mind &quot;that alert brain&quot; at work. One of the most tedious and revealing sections of his &quot;diaries&quot; deals with the self-examination he went through to persuade himself to run for President in 1952. Couldn't the man ''see?'' the reader keeps asking himself. No, he could not. It was not in his nature to appear to want something; his nature was to be ''wanted''. And so he progressed from obscurity- he first appears in the White House Usher's Diary at two-thirty on February 9, 1942, as &quot;P.D. Eisenhauer&quot;- to greatness. His rise was rocketlike. Within less than two years he went from lieutenant colonel to full general. His exposure to politics in the raw came as rapidly as his promotions. When he was appointed to command the North African expedition, Eisenhower was briefed by Robert Murphy, our diplomatic representative there, on the &quot;bewildering complexities&quot; of the quarrels among not only the [[France|French]] factions but [[Spain|Spanish]], [[Arabs|Arab]], [[Berber people|Berber]], [[Germany|German]], and [[Russia|Russian]] as well. &quot;Eisenhower listened with a kind of horrified fascination,&quot; wrote Murphy, &quot;to my description of the possible complications... The General seemed to sense that this first campaign would present him with problems running the entire geopolitical gamut- it certainly did.&quot; What he could not have realized was that it would also place him in the crossfire between two towering political personalities, [[Franklin D. Roosevelt|Franklin Roosevelt]] and [[Charles de Gaulle]]. Say this, too, for Eisenhower: He was able to confront himself, in words and on paper, with the harsh unpleasantness of the work that lay ahead. &quot;The actual fact is,&quot; he wrote in a note to his desk pad on May 5, 1942, &quot;that not 1 man in 20 in Govt. (including the W. and N. Depts) realizes what a grisly, dirty, tough business we are in!&quot;
** Eric Larrabee, ''Commander in Chief: Franklin Delano Roosevelt, His Lieutenants, and Their War'' (1987), p. 421

* In the Pacific we gave our enemies a costly lesson in amphibious warfare, just as in Europe we, with our allies, demonstrated successful coalition warfare. The performance of all branches of the services in Europe under General Eisenhower, in the central and southern Pacific under [[Chester W. Nimitz|Admiral Nimitz]], and in the southwestern Pacific under [[Douglas MacArthur|General MacArthur]] brought glory to themselves and to their country.
** William D. Leahy, ''I Was There'' (1950), p. 439

* Like the others, Ike declined true to form. When he requested that he be returned to his five-star rank- reassuming the identity of general rather than Mr. President, about the only tangible benefit being that he got to keep Sergeant Moaney as his valet- [[John F. Kennedy|JFK]] was flabbergasted. But it was completely in character. Dwight Eisenhower was a soldier at the core, and this was the identity he intended to die with. It was largely in this role that he was consulted by his successors, particularly [[Lyndon Johnson]], now the one caught in Vietnam's quicksand. Eisenhower thought he was too involved in the day-to-day running of the war, and advised him to &quot;go for victory,&quot; suggestions Johnson was not about to follow.
** Robert L. O'Connell, ''Team America: Patton, MacArthur, Marshall, Eisenhower, and the World They Forged'' (2022). New York: HarperCollins Publishers, p. 

* Ike's remaining nine years were generally happy ones. He presided over the farm, and Mamie the house at Gettysburg. He painted frequently, a hobby begun at Columbia and pursued without much talent, almost purely for relaxation. There was still the Gang for golf and bridge, Scrabble with Mamie in her sunroom, and there were grandchildren to indulge. The Eisenhowers also began spending the winters at Eldorado Country Club in California's high chaparral, doing much the same things. Being Ike, writing was an obvious recourse. But while ''Crusade in Europe'' had been dictated in a blazing three months, Eisenhower now struggled for three years with his White House memoirs, and the two-volume product was not nearly so crisp, bordering on turgid, actually, robbed of energy and coherence by security considerations. But later he bounced back and produced ''At Ease: Stories I Tell to Friends'', a look back much more in the spirit of MacArthur's ''Reminiscences'', and accordingly more readable. &lt;br&gt;Unfortunately, Ike's good times were punctuated by heart attacks, one in November 1965 he recovered well enough from to play golf again; but a coronary in April 1968 landed him in his last stop, Walter Reed, ward 8, VIP suite. Here he suffered a third the day after giving a televised speech to the GOP convention in Miami about to nominate [[Richard Nixon]] for president. It was from the same sickbed that he watched Nixon win the election and the White House, and then his daughter Julie marry Ike's grandson David, tying these two now presidential families together with bonds of matrimony. For Ike, there was no escape from Nixon. &lt;br&gt;And nothing to do but wait for the end in the suite Mamie had decorated in soft pinks and greens. On March 27, he told his son he wanted to be taken off life support: &quot;I've had enough, John. Tell them to let me go.&quot; The next morning he summoned John and grandson David and had them lower the stage and stand at attention while he uttered his last words: &quot;I want to go; God take me,&quot; then lapsed into unconsciousness. He died just past noon, March 28, 1969. The next day his body was placed in the Capitol Rotunda, in a standard-issue Army coffin, clad in his Ike jacket uniform, devoid of decorations, only his five stars. Among the mourners was [[Charles de Gaulle]], as promised, with him to the end. &lt;br&gt;The Washington ceremonies concluded, his flag-draped casket was placed on a funeral train for Abilene, where two days later Dwight David Eisenhower was laid to rest on the property of his boyhood home in a simple funeral for just family and close friends, next to the grave of little Icky. A decade later Mamie joined them there. But before she did, when asked by grandson David if she had ever truly known her husband, Mamie replied: &quot;I'm not sure anyone did.&quot;
** Robert L. O'Connell, ''Team America: Patton, MacArthur, Marshall, Eisenhower, and the World They Forged'' (2022). New York: HarperCollins Publishers, p. 482-483

* '''Eisenhower was known as a [[harmonizer]], a man who could get [[diverse]] factions to [[work]] toward a common [[goal]]... [[Leadership]], he explained, meant [[patience]] and conciliation, not &quot;hitting people over the head.&quot; '''
** [[w:David Oshinsky|David M. Oshinsky]], in ''A Conspiracy So Immense : The World of Joe McCarthy‎'', (2005), p. 259

* He was a natural choice as the senior American general in Europe. After a year in the field he had much more experience than Marshall. He had a reputation as a good manager of men, a good chair for a committee. A tall, balding figure, Eisenhower ('Ike' to almost everyone) looked at 53 like a school headmaster in uniform- even more so when he donned his round-rimmed spectacles to read. Born in Abilene, Kansas, in 1890, the son of a failed storekeeper, his rise to supreme commander had much of the [[American Dream|American dream]] about it. With no money and a modest mid-West education behind him, he stumbled into an army career in which he quickly showed himself to be an energetic organiser. The [[World War I|First World War]] ended before he got to Europe. He swore to himself that he would 'make up for this', but he spent a fruitless twenty years stuck at the rank of major. There was nowhere to fight and little to fight with. On the outbreak of war he was posted to the War Department to take over as Deputy for War Plans, but not until August 1942 did he get a field command, Supreme Commander for the Torch landings in North Africa. When he arrived in Africa in November to take up his command he had never seen armed combat. His talents were managerial. His inexperience was self-evident; Brooke complained that he had 'absolutely no strategical outlook'. His strength was his ability to achieve 'good cooperation' from subordinates and allies alike. Such a talent was at a premium in preparing Overlord.
** [[Richard Overy]], ''Why the Allies Won'' (1995), p. 144

*No [[doubt]] history will say that Eisenhower was a soldier. For my part, I will remember, above all, his [[goodness]]. He was a fundamentally good man who knew how to be loved by the Americans. I was fond of Ike.
** [[Muhammad Reza Pahlavi]] (1980) ''The Shah's Story'', page 143

* '''Of all the many talks I had in Washington, none gave me such pleasure as that with you.''' There were two reasons for this. In the first place, you are about my oldest [[friend]]. In the second place, your self-assurance and to me, at least, demonstrated [[ability]], give me a great feeling of [[confidence]] about the [[future]] ... and '''I have the utmost confidence that through your efforts we will eventually beat the [[hell]] out of those bastards — &quot;You [[name]] them; I'll shoot them!&quot; '''
** [[George S. Patton]], in a letter to Eisenhower (1942), to this he replied: &quot;I don't have the slightest trouble naming the hellions I'd like to have you shoot; my problem is to figure out some way of getting you to the place you can do it.&quot; as quoted in ''Eisenhower : A Soldier's Life'' (2003) by Carlo D'Este, p. 301

* '''Sometimes I think your [[life]] and mine are under the protection of some supreme being or [[fate]], because, after many years of parallel [[thought]], we find ourselves in the positions we now occupy.'''
** [[George S. Patton]], in a letter to Eisenhower (May 1942), as quoted in ''Eisenhower : A Soldier's Life'' (2003) by Carlo D'Este, p. 301

* '''I LIKE IKE!'''
** [[w:Peter George Peterson|Peter George Peterson]], who devised this slogan for the [[w:Draft Eisenhower movement|Draft Eisenhower movement]] (Spring 1951) - [http://www.livingroomcandidate.org/commercials/1952 Ike for President campaign commercial using the slogan (1952)]

* In ''The Hidden-Hand Presidency : Eisenhower as Leader'', Greenstein attributed part of the public's discontent with presidential performance to the conflict built into the Constitution between the president's apolitical and unifying role as chief of state and his partisan and divisive role as head of government. ... '''Eisenhower was able to bridge the built-in contradictions of the office and provide an effective leadership style.''' In his analysis of Eisenhower, Greenstein focused on three classes of variables: the personal properties of the man, his leadership strategies, and his organizational style. '''Eisenhower's [[political]] [[psychology]] exhibited antithetical qualities in public and private, a duality well suited for adapting to contradictory public [[expectations]].''' His leadership strategies involved making his job as chief of state readily visible while covertly exercising much of his public leadership. '''In parallel fashion, his organizational style focused public attention on the formal machinery but left unpublicized his use of informal organization.'''
** [http://www.princeton.edu/politics/people/bios/index.xml?netid=fig Princeton University profile of Fred Greenstein, citing his anaylysis of Eisenhower in ''The Hidden-Hand Presidency: Eisenhower as Leader'' (1982)]

* He was pretty. His eyes were kind and young. One had to wonder whether he was fourteen years old, or a thousand, being so smooth and untouched. A little boy peered out of the man's face. He was funny... I was bewildered... a man, responsible for the life and death of thousands, and yet there was no trace on him? One could be frightened of less, and yet so harmlessly innocent? Yes, innocent was the word... I knew I would remember this meeting the rest of my life, because I had never before met an emptyness like this.
** [[Ingeborg Refling Hagen]], in ''Memoirs'' vol. III

* The Cold War deepened and expanded during the administration of Dwight D. Eisenhower. While the superpower stalemate was maintained in Europe, the rearmament of [[w:West Germany|West Germany]], the [[w:Hungarian Revolution|Hungarian Revolution]], and the status of [[Berlin]] were among the issues that aggravated Cold War tensions on that continent during the Eisenhower years. Although Eisenhower kept his promise to end the Korean War, Sino-American relations remained frigid, and, in fact, were aggravated during two crises in the Taiwan Strait. During the Eisenhower years, the United States also became more deeply involved in Indochina and took the first steps down the slippery slope to the [[Vietnam War|Vietnam quagmire]]. The Cold War also intensified in the [[Middle East]], as a result of [[Egypt]]'s increasing dependence on the [[Soviet Union]], and in [[Latin America]], culminating in the establishment of the first Soviet client state in the Western Hemisphere, [[Cuba]]. During Eisenhower's presidency, the Cold War spread even to [[w:Sub-Saharan_Africa|sub-Saharan Africa]], when the superpowers intervened in the internal affairs of the [[Democratic Republic of the Congo|Congo]] (now [[Zaire]]). The Cold War truly became global during the Eisenhower years. The friction between the United States and the Soviet Union in the Third World became increasingly dangerous as a result of a mushrooming nuclear arms race during Eisenhower's years.
** Ronald Powaski, ''The Cold War: The United States and the Soviet Union, 1917-1991'' (1998), p. 97

* While Eisenhower personally was immune to [[Joseph McCarthy|McCarthy]]'s charges, he nevertheless tried to insulate his administration against the [[w:Red Scare|senator's witch-hunt]] in the federal bureaucracy by instituting an antisubversive program of his own. In April 1953 the president signed an executive order authorizing the heads of all federal departments and agencies to fire any employee whose loyalty, reliability, or &quot;good conduct and character&quot; were in doubt. Hundreds of federal employees lost their jobs under the new security system, but not a single traitor, spy, or subversive was indicted by the government. The [[United States Department of State|Department of State]] was particularly hard hit by the Eisenhower security program. Among those who lost their jobs were a number of experts in Chinese affairs, including [[John Paton Davies, Jr.|John Patton Davies]] and [[w:John Carter Vincent|John Carter Vincent]]. However, they were dismissed, not because they were subversives, but because they had predicted the collapse of the [[Taiwan|Nationalist government]] in [[China]] and had favored a more realistic policy toward the [[Chinese Communist Party|Chinese Communists]]. The decline of expertise and morale in the foreign service that resulted from this purge did much to prevent the formation of a realistic policy toward communism, particularly [[Asia|Asian]] communism, in the years ahead.
** Ronald Powaski, ''The Cold War: The United States and the Soviet Union, 1917-1991'' (1998), p. 99

* To back up the massive retaliation strategy, the administration intended to give the nation's armed forces a &quot;[[w:New Look|New Look]].&quot; It called for major cuts in conventional and a massive buildup of nuclear weapons. During the Eisenhower years, the size of the army and navy was reduced, that of the air force increased- a reflection of the fact that air power, and particularly strategic air power, was going to primary component of the administration's massive retaliation strategy. In June 1953 the [[w:U.S._Air_Force|U.S. Air Force]] began ordering the nation's first intercontinental jet bomber, the [[w:B-52_bomber|B-52]], which had a capability to deliver [[Nuclear weapons|hydrogen bombs]] on Soviet targets. For long-term deterrence, however, the Eisenhower administration placed major emphasis on developing [[w:Ballistic_missiles|ballistic missiles]]. In 1955 the president approved the development of the Atlas missile, America's first [[w:Intercontinental_ballistic_missile|intercontinental ballistic missile]] (ICBM), and its first [[w:Intermediate-range_ballistic_missile|intermediate-range ballistic missile]] (IRBM), the [[w:Thor_missile|Thor]]. In 1957 the president approved still another air force ICBM, a solid-fueled missile, the [[w:Minuteman_bomber|Minuteman]], which in the [[1960s]] replaced the manned bomber as the primary component of the nation's strategic forces.
** Ronald Powaski, ''The Cold War: The United States and the Soviet Union, 1917-1991'' (1998), p. 102

* The first [[Central Intelligence Agency|CIA]]-directed [[w:Covert_operations|covert operations]] during Eisenhower's presidency was conducted in [[Iran]]. On May 28, 1953, the Iranian prime minister, [[Mohammad Mosaddegh|Mohammed Mossadeq]], cabled Eisenhower to ask him for U.S. help in counteracting a boycott of Iranian oil by the international oil companies. The boycott was instituted after Mossadeq [[Nationalization|nationalized]] the [[w:Anglo-Iranian_Oil_Company|Anglo-Iranian Oil Company]] in 1951. Mossadeq told the president that, if he did not receive U.S. assistance, Iran might be forced to turn to the Soviet Union. Mossadeq's threat turned on Eisenhower's alarm bell. Only two weeks after entering the White House, the new president accepted the advice of the U.S. [[national security]] [[bureaucracy]], which insisted that Mossadeq had to be overthrown to ensure continued Western access to Iranian oil and to prevent Iran from becoming a Soviet satellite. Accordingly, on May 28, 1953, Eisenhower rebuffed Mossadeq's plea for assistance, stating that all that was required to settle the crisis was &quot;a reasonable agreement&quot; with the [[British Empire|British]]. Then Eisenhower added a warning of his own. He expressed his hope that, &quot;before it is too late, the Government of Iran will take such steps as are in its power to prevent a further deterioration of the situation.&quot;
** Ronald Powaski, ''The Cold War: The United States and the Soviet Union, 1917-1991'' (1998), p. 104

*My dear Mr. President: I was sitting in the audience at the Summit Meeting of Negro Leaders yesterday when you said we must have patience. On hearing you say this, I felt like standing up and saying, &quot;Oh no! Not again. &quot; I respectfully remind you sir, that we have been the most patient of all people. When you said we must have self-respect, I wondered how we could have self-respect and remain patient considering the treatment accorded us through the years. 17 million Negroes cannot do as you suggest and wait for the hearts of men to change. We want to enjoy now the rights that we feel we are entitled to as Americans. This we cannot do unless we pursue aggressively goals which all other Americans achieved over 150 years ago. As the chief executive of our nation, I respectfully suggest that you unwittingly crush the spirit of freedom in Negroes by constantly urging forbearance and give hope to those pro-segregation leaders like Governor Faubus who would take from us even those freedoms we now enjoy. Your own experience with Governor Faubus is proof enough that forbearance and not eventual integration is the goal the pro-segregation leaders seek. In my view, an unequivocal statement backed up by action such as you demonstrated you could take last fall in dealing with Governor Faubus if it became necessary, would let it be known that America is determined to provide -- in the near future for Negroes -- the freedoms we are entitled to under the constitution, Respectfully yours,
**[[Jackie Robinson]], May 13 1958, anthologized in ''Letters of Note'' edited by Shaun Usher (2013)

* '''Eisenhower had about the most expressive [[face]] I ever painted, I guess. Just like an actor's. Very mobile.''' When he talked, he used all the facial muscles. And he had a great, wide mouth that I liked. '''When he [[smiled]], it was just like the [[sun]] came out.''' 
** [[Norman Rockwell]], as quoted in ''A Rockwell Portrait : An Intimate Biography‎'' (1978) by Donald Walton, p. 198

*Foreign policy is remembering what Dwight D. Eisenhower said as he left office: &quot;In the councils of government, we must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the military-industrial complex. The potential for the disastrous rise of misplaced power exists and will persist.&quot;...What Eisenhower said over fifty years ago is even more
true today.
**[[Bernie Sanders]], ''Where We Go from Here'' (2018)

*&quot;The improvement of race relations,&quot; Eisenhower wrote in 1953, &quot;is one of those things that will be healthy and sound only if it starts locally. I do not believe that prejudices, even palpably unjustified prejudices will succumb to compulsion. Consequently, I believe that Federal law imposed upon our States... would set back the cause of race relations for a long, long time.&quot; At a dinner with [[Earl Warren|Warren]] in 1954, while the court was deliberating over [[w:Brown_v._Board_of_Education|Brown v. Board of Education]], the case that would outlaw school segregation, he told the chief justice that [[White people|white]] [[Racial segregation|segregationists]] were &quot;not bad people. All they are concerned about is to see that their sweet little girls are not required to sit in school alongside some big overgrown [[Black people|Negro]].&quot;
**[[Adam Serwer]], ''The Cruelty is the Point'' (2021)

* We ought to invite Eisenhower to [[Moscow]] sometime. I want to meet him.
** [[Joseph Stalin]], in a remark to Georgy Zhukov during a telephone conversation between them on 5 June 1945. As quoted by Zhukov in ''The Memoirs of Marshal Zhukov'' (1971), p. 662

* '''The decision to weigh Lieut. Gen. [[George S. Patton|Patton's]] great services to his country, in [[World War I]] and [[World War II]], from these shores to Casablanca and through [[Tunisia]] to triumph in [[w:Sicily|Sicily]], on the one hand, against an indefensible act on the other, was Gen. Eisenhower's.''' &lt;br /&gt; As his report shows, General Eisenhower in making his decision also considered the value to our country of General Patton's aggressive, winning leadership in the bitter battles which are to come before final victory. '''I am confident that you will agree with me that Gen. Eisenhower's decision, under these difficult circumstances, was right and proper.'''
** [[Henry L. Stimson]], in his report to the U.S. Senate on the [[w:George S. Patton slapping incidents|George S. Patton slapping incidents]], supporting Eisenhower's decision to retain Patton's services in the European theatre of WWII (November 1943).

* He'll sit here and say, &quot;Do this! Do that! And nothing will happen. Poor Ike—it won't be a bit like the Army. He'll find it very frustrating.
** [[Harry Truman]] (summer 1952), quoted in ''Presidential Power'' by Richard Neustadt

* '''Dwight D. Eisenhower was a reluctant [[politician]].''' His decision to run for president in 1952 was rooted in a deep concern over the scope of the domestic debate about how best to respond to the Communist challenge.
** Andreas Wenger, in ''Living with Peril : Eisenhower, Kennedy, and Nuclear Weapons'' (1997), Ch. 1, p. 14

* If Europeans hungered for recovery, Americans longed for stability. For more than twenty years, US voters had faced one emergency after another: the [[Great Depression]], the [[New Deal]], wars in [[Europe]] and [[Asia]], and the [[Cold War]]. In 1952 they voted for stability and normality under General Dwight D. Eisenhower, the first professional military man to head the US government since [[Ulysses S. Grant]] in the 1870s and the first Republican president since the onset of the national crises. Eisenhower was an [[Internationalism|internationalist]] and a Cold Warrior who believed that the United States needed to confront the [[Soviet Union|USSR]] and Communism worldwide. In his campaign, he had argued for the need to win in Korea and for “rolling back” Communism in Europe and Asia. But his main rhetoric was intended to assure Americans that they were safe under his leadership, and that the United States would defeat its enemies if it put its own house in order through national unity, fiscal discipline, a strong defense, and clear international priorities.
** Odd Arne Westad, ''The Cold War: A World History'' (2017) 
*Intent to move away from the Cold War as a national emergency, Eisenhower ended up institutionalizing it as policy and doctrine. On the Korean War, the new president simply got lucky. Stalin’s death removed the last hindrance for a negotiated armistice. But Eisenhower believed that projections of US strength would prevent what he saw as Soviet adventurism in the future. Confirming [[Harry S. Truman|Truman]]’s overall containment strategy, Eisenhower wanted to reinforce it by increasing US nuclear capacity and readiness. He also upgraded the CIA’s covert operations and used them to [[Coup d'état|overthrow governments]] the president saw as inimical to US Cold War interests, such as in [[w:1953_Iranian_coup_d'etat|Iran in 1953]] and in [[w:1954_Guatemalan_coup_d'etat|Guatemala the following year]]. Eisenhower saw the Cold War as a total contest that would last for a long time, and in which US purpose and readiness would remain the critical element. But the new president also believed, firmly, that the United States could fight the Cold War without making too many compromises with regard to its domestic affairs. 
**Odd Arne Westad, ''The Cold War: A World History'' (2017) 
* Dwight Eisenhower, with [[Churchill]] and [[Stalin]] removed from the world scene, became clearly its most imposing figure — a distinction only [[Franklin Delano Roosevelt|Roosevelt]] and [[Woodrow Wilson]] (briefly in 1919) had achieved. Eisenhower was also the first television president, visible virtually every night on the home screen. After Eisenhower, ''any'' president was to be the single most familiar figure to every American, far more so than anyone's mayor or senator or governor.
** Tom Wicker, ''One Of Us: Richard Nixon and the American Dream'' (1991), p. 676-677

* Furthermore, being an honest and modest man, Eisenhower was conscious of his lack of experience in the tactical handling of armies, and this gave him a sense of professional inferiority in dealing with men like [[Bernard Montgomery, 1st Viscount Montgomery of Alamein|Montgomery]] and [[George S. Patton|Patton]] who had been through the mill of command at every level. Because he had no philosophy of battle which he himself had tested in action, Eisenhower was reluctant to impose his ideas, unless the decision was one which he, as Supreme Commander, had to make. As a general rule, he tended to seek the opinions of all and to work out the best compromise. When he could gather his commanders and advisers around the conference table, he had a remarkable capacity for distilling the counsel of many friends into a single solution, but, when his commanders were scattered over France, he was open to persuasion by the last strong man to whom he talked.
** Chester Wilmot, ''The Struggle for Europe'' (1952), p. 467-468

* It seems fair to say that the very qualities which made Eisenhower a successful Supreme Commander prevented him at this time from becoming a successful commander in the field His great talent lay in holding the Allied team together, and in reconciling the interests of the different nations and services. In the situation which had now developed, however, Eisenhower's conscientious tolerance and inclination to compromise were liabilities. The occasion called for a man with a bold plan, a Commander-in-Chief who knew what was essential and had the will to impose his strategic ideas without regard for personalities or public opinion.
** Chester Wilmot, ''The Struggle for Europe'' (1952), p. 468

* The plan which Montgomery presented to Eisenhower at their meeting on August 23rd was bold enough, but it meant halting Patton and confining the [[w:Third_United_States_Army|Third Army]] to the defensive role of flank protection during the advance of the [[w:Second_British_Army|Second British]] and [[w:First_United_States_Army|First American Armies]] to the Ruhr. Eisenhower's first reaction was that, even if it was militarily desirable (which he did admit), it was politically impossible to stop Patton in full cry &quot;The American public,&quot; said Eisenhower, &quot;would never stand for t; and public opinion wins war.&quot; To which Montgomery replied, &quot;Victories win wars. Give people victory and they won't care who won it.&quot;
** Chester Wilmot, ''The Struggle for Europe'' (1952), p. 468

* Montgomery may have been right so far as the British public were concerned, but Eisenhower knew that his troops in the field and his people at home would see the issue in simple terms, almost in terms of American football. Patton was 'carrying the ball,' and was making an 'end run' with every American cheering him on. As Eisenhower saw it, there was no justification- in football or in battle- for taking the ball away from him. Patton had already proved himself to be a master of exploitation and his troops were already across the Seine. Montgomery had no such reputation and his troops had not yet reached the Seine. Neither the [[United Kingdom|British]] nor the [[Canada|Canadians]] had yet shown a capacity for advancing with the dash and drive the Americans had demonstrated so brilliantly since the break-out. It is not surprising, therefore, that Eisenhower would have doubted at this stage whether Montgomery had the troops or the commanders to carry the northward thrust through to the Ruhr before the Germans could establish a coherent front.
** Chester Wilmot, ''The Struggle for Europe'' (1952), p. 468

* Dwight Eisenhower was an outstanding leader long before he supervised the campaign against Hitler. The qualities he exhibited, as early as his initial posting after his graduation from West Point, led to a spectacular career that culminated in two historic achievements- the defeat of Nazi Germany and the presidency.
** John Wukovits, ''Eisenhower'' (2006), New York: Palgrave Macmillan, October 2006 first edition hardcover, p. 179

* At numerous times in his life, Eisenhower showed that the call of duty governed his actions, not the summons of glory. Early in his career, he yearned to command soldiers in the field, but orders to staff positions crushed his hopes. Instead of complaining, he put aside his ambition and placed full effort into whatever task he faced. While most of his West Point classmates experienced combat in the fields of France in World War I, he labored at a string of training posts. As disappointed as he might have been, he declined lucrative financial offers on two occasions to remain in the military. His reasons simply stated were that he saw war coming and knew that the nation needed him. Eisenhower was not one to act in his own interests, as MacArthur did in the Philippines or Montgomery and Patton did in Europe. He did what he was supposed to do as an Army officer, even if it was not always what he wanted to do. As such he serves as a superb example for everyone.
** John Wukovits, ''Eisenhower'' (2006), New York: Palgrave Macmillan, October 2006 first edition hardcover, p. 185-186

* With my new instructions I returned to Berlin. The very day after my arrival I was visited by General of the Army Eisenhower with his numerous retinue, amongst whom was [[w:Carl_Spaatz|General Spaatz]], Chief of the US Strategic Air Command. We received General Eisenhower at the Headquarters of the front in Wedenschlosse. Present at the meeting was A. Ya. [[w:Andrey_Vyshinsky|Vyshinsky]]. We greeted each other like soldiers, and, I may say, in a friendly way. Taking both my hands in his, Eisenhower looked me over for a long time, then said, &quot;So that's what you're like.&quot;
** [[Georgy Zhukov]], ''The Memoirs of Marshal Zhukov'' (1971), p. 659

* As old soldiers, I think you and I will find a common language and work as a team.
** [[Georgy Zhukov]], during his first meeting with Eisenhower, as quoted in ''The Memoirs of Marshal Zhukov'' (1971), p. 660

* Outwardly Eisenhower impressed me favourably. On June 5 Eisenhower, Montgomery and de Lattre de Tassigny arrived in [[Berlin]] to sign the declaration on the defeat of [[Nazi Germany|Germany]] and the assumption of supreme authority in Germany by Governments of the USSR, the US, Britain and [[France]]. Before the formal meeting, Eisenhower came to my headquarters to confer upon me a high American military award: I was made Chief Commander of the Legion of Merit. On receiving the award, I immediately called Stalin and told him about it. Stalin said: &quot;We should decorate Eisenhower and Montgomery with Orders of Victory and [[w:Jean_de_Lattre_de_Tassigny|de Lattre de Tassigny]] with the Order of Suvorov, First Class.&quot; &quot;May I tell them about it?&quot; I asked. Stalin said I could.
** [[Georgy Zhukov]], ''The Memoirs of Marshal Zhukov'' (1971), p. 660

==See also==
* [[List of presidents of the United States]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Wikisource author}}
{{commonscat|Dwight Eisenhower}}
* [http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/ The Eisenhower Presidential Library and Museum]
* [http://millercenter.org/president/eisenhower Extensive essay on Dwight D. Eisenhower] (with shorter essays on each member of his cabinet and First Lady from the Miller Center of Public Affairs)
* [http://youtube.com/watch?v=Y9RAxAgksSE 1952 Ike for President TV Ad]
* [http://millercenter.org/scripps/archive/speeches Full audio of Eisenhower speeches via the Miller Center of Public Affairs (UVa)]
* [http://millercenter.org/scripps/digitalarchive/presidentialrecordings/eisenhower/index Eisenhower's Secret White House Recordings via the Miller Center of Public Affairs (UVa)] {{dead link}}
* [http://www.potus.com/ddeisenhower.html Dwight David Eisenhower biography]
* [http://www.badley.info/history/Eisenhower-Dwight-David-USA.biog.html Eisenhower Chronology World History Database]
* [http://www.dwightdeisenhower.com/library-museum.html Eisenhower Presidential Library &amp; Museum, including Home and Tomb]
* [http://www.jan.vandercrabben.name/unidocs/kcl/Eisenhower_and_Nukes.pdf Essay: Why the Eisenhower administration embraced nuclear weapons (PDF)]
*[[wikisource:Eisenhower's farewell address|Farewell Address]] (Wikisource)
* [http://www.army.mil/arkansas/ Guardians of Freedom – 50th Anniversary of Operation Arkansas, by ARMY.MIL]
* [http://avalon.law.yale.edu/subject_menus/inaug.asp First Inaugural Address]
* [http://www.footnote.com/viewer.php?image=4346703 Original Document: D-Day Statement from Dwight D. Eisenhower]
* [http://www.yale.edu/lawweb/avalon/presiden/inaug/eisen2.htm Second Inaugural Address]
* [http://www.spartacus.schoolnet.co.uk/USAeisenhower.htm Spartacus Educational Biography]
* [http://americanheraldry.org/pages/index.php?n=President.Eisenhower The Arms of Dwight David Eisenhower]
* [http://www.eisenhowermemorial.org/index.html The Dwight D. Eisenhower Memorial Commission]
* [http://www.army.mil/cmh-pg/books/Last_Salute/Ch29.htm The Last Salute: Civil and Military Funeral, 1921–1969, CHAPTER XXIX, Former President Dwight D. Eisenhower, State Funeral, March 28 – April 2, 1969] by B.&amp;nbsp;C.&amp;nbsp;Mossman and M.&amp;nbsp;W.&amp;nbsp;Stark
* [http://www.eisenhowermemorial.org/presidential-papers/index.htm The Presidential Papers of Dwight David Eisenhower (searchable online)]
* [http://www.whitehouse.gov/about/presidents/dwightdeisenhower/ White House biography]
* [http://www.nps.gov/history/NR/twhp/wwwlps/lessons/29ike/29ike.htm ''Thaw in the Cold War: Eisenhower and Khrushchev at Gettysburg,'' a National Park Service Teaching with Historic Places (TwHP) lesson plan]
* [http://www.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,19690404,00.html ''Time'' magazine cover: Dwight D. Eisenhower, April 4, 1969]
* [http://www.american-divisions.com/doc.asp?documentid=138&amp;pagenumber=1 Eisenhower's report on operation Torch]
*{{gutenberg author|id=Dwight+D.+Eisenhower|name=Dwight D. Eisenhower}}
* [http://www.gresham.ac.uk/event.asp?PageId=45&amp;EventId=636 &quot;The American Presidency: Transformation and Change – Dwight Eisenhower&quot; by Vernon Bogdanor, (18 March 2008)]
* [http://www.ikecenter.uno.edu The Eisenhower Center for American Studies]
* [http://www.eisenhower.archives.gov/all_about_ike/speeches/post_presidential_speeches.pdf Post-presidential speeches]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Eisenhower, Dwight D.}}
[[Category:Military leaders from the United States]]
[[Category:Presidents of the United States]]
[[Category:1890 births]]
[[Category:1969 deaths]]
[[Category:Politicians from Texas]]
[[Category:Legion of Honour recipients]]
[[Category:United States presidential candidates, 1956]]
[[Category:United States presidential candidates, 1952]]
[[Category:Republican Party (United States) politicians]]
[[Category:Anti-communists from the United States]]
[[Category:Presbyterians from the United States]]
[[Category:People of World War II]]
[[Category:United States Military Academy alumni]]

== Notes ==
{{Reflist|25em}}
[[Category:NATO Supreme Allied Commanders]]
[[Category:Commanding Generals and Chiefs of Staff of the United States Army]]
[[Category:Military leaders of World War II]]
[[Category:People of the Cold War]]</text>
      <sha1>ff33pub1omb8rq4df6f0h8xjcyzpdnc</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Isaac Asimov</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>297</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965129</id>
      <parentid>3958266</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:44:21Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>1989Nihil</username>
        <id>1018280</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* 1971–1980 */</comment>
      <origin>3965129</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="152900" sha1="20g02gmlvbgkkpl48tetjzvw3jn5h7e" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Isaac Asimov, RIT NandE Vol13Num29 1981 Sep24 Complete.jpg|thumb| It is [[change]], continuing change, inevitable change, that is the dominant factor in [[society]] today. No sensible [[decision]] can be made any longer without taking into account not only the [[world]] [[Present|as it is]], but the world [[Future|as it will be]]…]]
'''[[w:Isaac Asimov|Isaac Asimov]]''' (''c''. [[2 January]] [[1920]] – [[6 April]] [[1992]]) was a [[Russia|Russian]]-born [[USA|American]] biochemist who was a prolific writer of both [[fiction]] and non-fiction. His works include the [[w:Foundation series|''Foundation'' series]] and ''[[I, Robot]].''

== Quotes ==
[[File:Isaac.Asimov01.jpg|thumb|right|There is no [[belief]], however [[foolish]], that will not gather its [[faithful]] adherents who will defend it to the [[death]].]]
[[File:Weird Tales November 1939.jpg|thumb|right|You wait for the [[war]] to happen like [[w:vultures|vultures]]. If you want to [[help]], prevent the war.]]
[[File:Artwork showing a blurred globe and other celestial bodies, inspired by the asteroid belt of HD 69830.jpg|thumb|right| Outside intelligences, exploring the Solar System with true impartiality, would be quite likely to enter the Sun in their records thus: Star X, spectral class G0, 4 planets plus debris.]]
=== General sources ===
&lt;!-- These should be presented chronologically by earliest known source. --&gt;
[[File:KT-impact.gif |thumb|right|Science fiction writers foresee the inevitable, and although problems and catastrophes may be inevitable, solutions are not.]]
[[File:Gort (The Day the Earth Stood Still).jpg|thumb|right|There are limits beyond which your folly will not carry you. I am glad of that. In fact, I am relieved.]]
[[File:Aime-Morot-Le-bon-Samaritain.JPG|thumb|right|If I were not an [[atheist]], I would [[believe]] in a [[God]] who would choose to save people on the basis of the totality of their [[lives]] and not the pattern of their [[words]].]]
[[File:William Bouguereau - Dante and Virgile - Google Art Project 2.jpg |thumb|right|I feel that the longest and worst [[punishment]] should be reserved for those who slandered God by inventing Hell.]]
[[File:Mathematical computations.jpg|thumb|The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom.]]
====1957–1970====
*'''Science fiction may be defined as that branch of literature which deals with the response of human beings to advances in science and technology.''' Actual change in science and technology, occurring quickly enough and striking deeply enough to affect a human being in the course of his normal lifetime, is a phenomenon peculiar to the world only since the Industrial Revolution ... The first well-known writer who responded to this new factor in human affairs by dealing regularly with science fiction, by studying the effect of additional scientific advance upon mankind ... was Jules Verne. In the English language, the early master was H. G. Wells. Between them, they laid the foundation for every theme upon which science fiction writers have been ringing variations ever since.
** &quot;Escape Into Reality&quot; (1957) in ''The Humanist'', reprinted in ''Is Anyone There?'' (1967), pp. 288–289

*'''It is only afterward that a new [[idea]] seems reasonable. To begin with, it usually seems unreasonable.'''
** &quot;How Do People Get New Ideas?&quot; (1959)

* It is the nature of science that answers automatically pose new and more subtle questions.
** ''The Wellsprings of Life'' (1960), p. 141

* People who want to do so can lose weight most safely and permanently if they realize that above all they must be patient. ... It is better to eat a ''little'' less at each meal than impulse would suggest and to do that constantly. Add to this a ''little'' more exercise or activity than impulse suggests and keep that up constantly too. A few less calories taken in each day and a few more used up will decrease weight, slowly, to be sure, but without undue misery. And with better long-range results too.
** &quot;The Hungry People&quot; (October 1960) in ''Mademoiselle'', reprinted in ''Is Anyone There?'' (1967), pp. 48–49

* '''The dullness of fact is the mother of fiction.'''
** ''Fact and Fancy'' (1962), p. 11

* '''An observer studying the Solar system dispassionately, and finding himself capable of bringing the four giant planets to his notice, could reasonably say that the Solar system consisted of one star, four planets, and some traces of debris.'''
** &quot;Worlds In Order&quot; in ''The Secret of the Universe'' (1992), p. 63. Often misquoted as &quot;Jupiter plus debris&quot;.

* Outside intelligences, exploring the Solar System with true impartiality, would be quite likely to enter the [[Sun]] in their records thus: Star X, spectral class G0, 4 planets plus debris.
** &quot;By Jove!&quot; in ''View from a Height'' (1963)

* '''Predicting the future is a hopeless, thankless task, with ridicule to begin with and, all too often, scorn to end with.'''
** &quot;The World of 1990&quot; in ''The Diners' Club Magazine'', January 1965

* Ten years on the moon could tell us more about the universe than a thousand years on the earth might be able to.
** What Can We Expect of the Moon?&quot; in ''The American Legion Magazine'', March 1965

* The fact that the general incidence of leukemia has doubled in the last two decades may be due, partly, to the increasing use of x-rays for numerous purposes. The incidence of leukemia in doctors, who are likely to be so exposed, is twice that of the general public. In radiologists … the incidence is ten times greater.
** Statement of 1965, as quoted without citation of a specific work in [https://archive.org/details/BookOfScienceAndNatureQuotations-IsaacAsimov ''Isaac Asimov’s Book of Science and Nature Quotations'' (1988), edited by Asimov and Jason A. Shulman, p. 233]

* [B]y 1204, the only place where the entire body of Greek learning existed, still intact, was Constantinople. As a result of the crusaders' conquest, however, Constantinople was ruthlessly pillaged and destroyed and almost all the great treasures of ancient Greek learning were lost forever. It is because of that sack, for instance, that we have only seven plays left out of the better than one hundred written by Sophocles. &lt;br&gt;The tragedy of 1204 can never be undone and for all of time, only bits and pieces of the marvelous Greek world can be known to us.
** ''The Greeks: A Great Adventure'' (1965), p. 291

* History is a story without an end.
** ''The Greeks: A Great Adventure'' (1965), p. 307

* Private profit is often hidden under a careful coating of great patriotism.
** ''The Roman Republic'' (1966), p. 128

* I ''don't'' believe in flying saucers... The energy requirements of interstellar travel are so great that it is inconceivable to me that any creatures piloting their ships across the vast depths of space would do so only in order to play games with us over a period of decades.
** &quot;On Flying Saucers&quot; in ''Is Anyone There?'' (1967), pp. 215–216

* '''Start with a planet like the earth, with a complement of simple compounds bound to exist upon it, add the energy of a nearby sun, and you are bound to end with nucleic acids. You can't avoid it.'''
** &quot;Constructing a Man&quot; in ''Is Anyone There?'' (1967), p. 93

* It is important to remember that the viciousness and wrongs of life stick out very plainly but that even at the worst times there is a great deal of goodness, kindness, and day-to-day decency that goes unnoticed and makes no headlines.
** ''The Roman Empire'' (1967), p. 91

* Indeed, it may well be argued that one reason for the decline in science, art, and literature was the increasing absorption of the better minds into a new sort of intellectual pursuit – theology.
** ''The Roman Empire'' (1967), p. 118

* [W]hen one plays for top prizes one must be prepared to pay top stakes.
** ''The Roman Empire'' (1967), p. 125

* It seems to be almost an invariable rule that as real power declines, the symbols of power multiply and intensify in compensation.
** ''The Roman Empire'' (1967), p. 176

* '''There is a kind of selective memory that afflicts men when they view the past. They see the good and overlook the evil.'''
** ''The Roman Empire'' (1967), p. 191

* 476 ... is usually taken as the date of the &quot;fall of the Roman Empire.&quot; The date, however, is a false one. No one at this period of time considered that the Roman Empire had &quot;fallen.&quot; Indeed, it still existed and was the most powerful realm in Europe. Its capital was at Constantinople and the Emperor was Zeno. It is only because we ourselves are culturally descended from the Roman west, that we tend to ignore the continued existence of the Roman Empire in the east.
** ''The Roman Empire'' (1967), p. 248

* Often, writers on historical events tend to consider ... a loss of willingness to fight as a sign of &quot;decadence,&quot; as though there were something despicable about not being a bully and not being willing to engage in mass murder. Perhaps we ought to feel instead that to cease to be warlike means to begin to be civilized and decent.
** ''The Egyptians'' (1967), p. 68

* Generals are usually a conservative force who can be relied on to oppose social change.
** ''The Egyptians'' (1967), p. 93

* In the world of today can there be peace anywhere until there is peace everywhere?
** ''The Egyptians'' (1967), p. 241

* The article was essentially about '''the coming disappearance of women'''. I pointed out that the only differences between men and women are the women are smaller and weaker than men, and women have to bear the children, and that all other differences are really social. They are born of the environment. They're not real. [...] &lt;br /&gt;You say, &quot;Women are so pure and sweet and nice, if only they have the vote, they would clean up politics.&quot; So you give them the vote, and politics is just as dirty as ever. [...] &lt;br /&gt;If we get into the 21st century when all the work that's required to be done (and there won't be much of it) doesn't require muscles anyway (it's all a matter of closing contacts, pushing papers, whatever the heck you do), women can do it as well as men. And when it comes to children, there's going to have to be a low birth rate (we'll have to or everything goes 'blooey!'). And in addition, children will be considered, I think, the responsibility of society and not the responsibility of their mothers. Children will be far too valuable to trust to their mothers (most of them are complete incompetents as mothers). 
** Talk at Boskone 5 (1968) ([https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAxlrdkY1oQ at 23:45]) (edited slightly)
** Concerning an article he wrote for &quot;the textile industry&quot;.

* Religion is more conservative than any other aspect of human life.
** ''The Near East'' (1968), p. 14

* '''[N]o matter how outrageous a lie may be, it will be accepted if stated loudly enough and often enough.'''
** ''The Near East'' (1968), p. 31

* It is by the Imperial Capital that contemporaries (and posterity, too) judge an Empire, and its magnificence impresses them mightily and leads them to judge the Emperor a great man and hero, even though it may all be based on robbery, and though the provinces of the Empire may be sunk in misery.
** ''The Near East'' (1968), p. 33

* We can hope that the ways of peace will attract the Arabic nations, for their territory and opportunities are broad enough for immeasurable advance, if the energies vented in spleen, are turned instead to a modernisation of the technology, a restoration of the soil, and a renovation of the economic, social, and political structure of those great and venerable lands.
** ''The Near East'' (1968), p. 260

* It is an odd fact that anyone who wishes to start a war must always make it appear that he is fighting in a just cause even if the real motive is naked aggression. Fortunately for the would-be aggressor, a &quot;just cause&quot; is very easy to find.
** ''The Dark Ages'' (1968), p. 69

* '''Probably, the most-often-repeated lesson in history is that foreigners who are called in to help one side in a civil war take over for themselves. It is a lesson that seems never to be learned despite endless repetition.'''
** ''The Dark Ages'' (1968), p. 188

* There has never been any custom, however useless it may become with changing conditions, that isn't clung to desperately simply because it is something old and familiar.
** ''The Dark Ages'' (1968), p. 193

* It is all too easy to forget that there are emotional motivations in history, as well as economic ones.
** ''The Shaping of England'' (1969), p. 15

* It seemed to him &lt;nowiki&gt;[&lt;/nowiki&gt;[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euphemius_(Sicily) Euphemius]&lt;nowiki&gt;]&lt;/nowiki&gt; it would be a brilliant notion to call in an outside force to fight on his behalf. This same brilliant notion has occurred to participants in civil wars uncounted times in history and it has ended in catastrophe just about every time, since those called in invariably take over for themselves. Of all history's lessons, this seems to be the plainest, and the most frequently ignored.
** ''Constantinople: The Forgotten Empire'' (1970), p. 153

====1971–1980====

* Had [[Hannibal]] had a government behind him that knew how to exploit victories – had he been born a Roman, for instance – he might have conquered the world.
** ''The Land of Canaan'' (1971), p. 218

* Throughout history there have been peasant rebellions which have followed always the same course. Blindly, the peasants sacked and destroyed, and when members of the &quot;upper classes&quot; fell into their hands, they killed ruthlessly and cruelly, for never in their lives had they been taught gentleness and mercy by those now in their power.
** ''The Shaping of France'' (1972), pp. 163–4

*'''I consider one of the most important duties of any scientist the teaching of science to students and to the general public.'''
** &quot;Academe and I&quot; (May 1972), in ''The Tragedy of the Moon'' (1973), p. 224

* I recognize the necessity of animal experiments with my mind but not with my heart.
** &quot;Doctor, Doctor, Cut My Throat&quot; (August 1972), in ''The Tragedy of the Moon'' (1973), p. 153

* Inspect every piece of pseudoscience and you will find a security blanket, a thumb to suck, a skirt to hold. What does the scientist have to offer in exchange? Uncertainty! Insecurity!
** ''Asimov's Guide to Science'' (1972), p. 15

* For man to become successful, for man to establish himself as the ruler of the planet, it was necessary for him to use his brain as something more than a device to make the daily routine of getting food and evading enemies a little more efficient. Man had to learn to control his environment.&quot;
** &quot;The Tragedy of the Moon,&quot; ''The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction'' (July 1972)

* &lt;!-- I must admit the title of this book gives me pause. Who says the enclosed stories are my ‘best’? Do I? Does the editor? Or some critic? Some reader? A general vote among the entire population of the world? &lt;br /&gt; And whoever says it — can it be so? --&gt; '''Can the word ‘best’ mean anything at all, except to some particular person in some particular mood?''' Perhaps not — so if we allow the word to stand as an absolute, you, or you, or perhaps you, may be appalled at omissions or inclusions or, never having read me before, may even be impelled to cry out, ‘Good heavens, are those his best?’
** &quot;Introduction&quot; in ''The Best of Isaac Asimov'' (1973)

*'''Hypocrisy is a universal phenomenon. It ends with death, but not before.'''
**&quot;By the Numbers&quot; (May 1973), in ''The Tragedy of the Moon'' (1973), p. 188

*Science is a systematic method for studying and working out those generalizations that seem to describe the behavior of the universe. It could exist as a purely intellectual game that would never affect the practical life of human beings either for good or evil, and that was very nearly the case in ancient Greece, for instance. Technology is the application of scientific findings to the tools of everyday life, and that application can be wise or unwise, useful or harmful. Very often, those who govern technological decisions are not scientists and know little about science.
**&quot;By the Numbers&quot; (May 1973), in ''The Tragedy of the Moon'' (1973), p. 190

* What I ''will'' be remembered for are the [[w:Foundation series|Foundation Trilogy]] and the [[w:Three Laws of Robotics|Three Laws of Robotics]]. What I ''want'' to be remembered for is no one [[book]], or no dozen books. Any single thing I have written can be paralleled or even surpassed by something someone else has done. However, my total corpus for quantity, quality and ''variety'' can be duplicated by no one else. That is what I want to be remembered for.
** ''Yours, Isaac Asimov'' (20 September 1973) &lt;!-- page 329 --&gt;

* The true discovery of America by mankind came when those first hunting bands crossed over from Siberia 25,000 years ago. This, however, never seems to count. When people speak of the &quot;discovery of America&quot; they invariably mean its discovery by Europeans.
** ''The Shaping of North America'' (1973), p. 6

* '''There is no belief, however foolish, that will not gather its faithful adherents who will defend it to the death.'''
** ''The Stars in Their Courses'' (1974), p. 36

* Franklin said, with an energy surprising in a man of his age, &quot;Then abandon this energy of yours and come back to the conditions which served my own world well enough.&quot;{{pb}}&quot;And burn wood, sir? There isn’t enough left, and there are too many of us. Sir, the population of the world in your day was just under 900,000,000. The population, today, is just over 3,700,000,000. The population has grown more than fourfold; yet it lives, on the average, more comfortably than the people in your day. They do so at the expense of a vastly increased rate of energy expenditure. For my time to return to yours means that billions must die.&quot;
** &quot;Benjamin's Bicentennial Blast&quot;, in ''The Saturday Evening Post'' (June/July 1974), p. 144, col. 4

* If, as I maintain and firmly believe, '''there is no objective definition of intelligence, and what we call intelligence is only a creation of cultural fashion and subjective prejudice''', what the devil is it we test when we make use of an intelligence test?
** &quot;Thinking About Thinking&quot; in ''Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction'', January 1975

* „Science fiction can be defined as that branch of literature that deals with the reaction of human beings to changes in science and technology.” 
** „How to See the Future.“ In: Natural History, Vol. LXXXIV. No. 4 (April 1975) Edit.: Alan Ternes ''et al''. New York, p. 92.

* My parents, both of whom spoke Russian fluently, made no effort to teach me Russian, but insisted on my learning English as rapidly and as well as possible. They even set about learning English themselves, with reasonable, but limited, success.&lt;br&gt;In a way, I am sorry. It would have been good to know the language of [[Aleksandr Pushkin|Pushkin]], [[Leo Tolstoy|Tolstoy]], and [[Fyodor Dostoyevsky|Dostoevski]]. On the other hand, I would not have been willing to let anything get in the way of the complete mastery of English. Allow me my prejudice: surely there is no language more majestic than that of [[William Shakespeare|Shakespeare]], [[John Milton|Milton]], and the [[King James Version|King James Bible]], and if I am to have one language that I know as only a native can know it, I consider myself unbelievably fortunate that it is English.
** ''Before the Golden Age, Book 1'' (1975), p. 19 of the Fawcett Crest paperback edition (2nd printing)

* '''[[Science fiction]] writers foresee the inevitable, and although problems and catastrophes may be inevitable, solutions are not.'''
** &quot;How Easy to See the Future&quot;, ''Natural History'' magazine (April 1975);&lt;!-- later published in ''Asimov on Science Fiction'' (1981) --&gt;

* Self-education is, I firmly believe, the only kind of education there is.
** &quot;Science Past, Science Future&quot; (1975) p. 208

* '''Straightforward preaching spoils the effectiveness of a story.''' If you can't resist the impulse to improve your fellow human beings, do it subtly.
** ''Buy Jupiter and Other Stories'' (1975), p. 21

* There is no way of being almost funny or mildly funny or fairly funny or tolerably funny. You are either funny or not funny and there is nothing in between. And usually it is the writer who thinks he is funny and the reader who thinks he isn't.
** ''Buy Jupiter and Other Stories'' (1975), p. 33

* [S]cientific writing is abhorrently stylized and places a premium on poor quality.
** ''Buy Jupiter and Other Stories'' (1975), p. 82

* If you're going to write a story, avoid contemporary references. They date a story and they have no staying power.
** ''Buy Jupiter and Other Stories'' (1975), p. 134

* Generals are, as a matter of course, allowed to be far more idiotic than ordinary human beings are permitted to be.
** ''Our Federal Union'' (1975), p. 248

* '''[[People]] are entirely too disbelieving of [[coincidence]].''' They are far too ready to dismiss it and to build arcane structures of extremely rickety substance in order to avoid it. I, on the other hand, see coincidence everywhere as an inevitable consequence of the laws of probability, according to which having no unusual coincidence is far more unusual than any coincidence could possibly be.
** &quot;[http://geobeck.tripod.com/frontier/planet.htm The Planet that Wasn't]&quot; originally published in ''The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction'' (May 1975)

* The history of science is full of revolutionary advances that required small insights that anyone might have had, but that, in fact, only one person did.
** &quot;The Three Numbers&quot; in ''Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine'' (September 1974); reprinted in ''More Tales of the Black Widowers'' (1976)

* '''We cannot afford enemies any more... Within a generation or two human society will be in total destructive disarray.''' Heaven knows how bad it will be. The most optimistic view I can take is this: Things will get so bad within a dozen years that it will become obvious ... that we must, whether were like each other or not, work together. We have no choice in the matter. ... Technologically, we can stop overpopulation, but we have to persuade people to accept the technology. ... Babies are the enemies of the human race ... Let's consider it this way: by the time the world doubles its population, the amount of energy we will be using will be increased sevenfold which means probably the amount of pollution that we are producing will also be increased sevenfold. If we are now threatened by pollution at the present rate, how will we be threatened with sevenfold pollution by, say, 2010 A.D., distributed among twice the population? We'll be having to grow twice the food out of soil that is being poisoned at seven times the rate.
** As quoted in [http://books.google.com/books?id=8HCwAAAAIAAJ&amp;q=%22Babies+are+the+enemies+of+the+human+race%22&amp;dq=%22Babies+are+the+enemies+of+the+human+race%22&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ei=i9ldVKqOM_jLsATbvYCgDA&amp;ved=0CCwQ6AEwAw ''Isaac Asimov'' (1977) by Joseph D. Olander and Martin Harry Greenberg, p. 165]

*What, then, of human activities? Is humankind itself hastening its own end? Man has, for instance, been burning carbon-containing fuel — wood, coal, oil, gas — at a steadily accelerating rate. All these fuels form carbon dioxide. Some is absorbed by plants and the oceans but not as fast as it is produced. This means the carbon dioxide content of the air is going up — slightly but nevertheless up. Carbon dioxide retains heat, and even a small rise means a warming of the Earth's atmosphere. This may result in the melting of the polar ice caps with unusual speed, flooding the world before we have learned climate control. In reverse, our industrial civilization is making our atmosphere dustier so that it reflects more sunlight away and cools the Earth slightly — thus making possible a glacial advance in a few centuries, also before we have learned climate control.
** &quot;20 Ways the World Could End&quot; in ''Popular Mechanics'' (March 1977)

*I believe that only scientists can understand the universe. It is not so much that I have confidence in scientists being right, but that I have so much in nonscientists being wrong.
** ''Quasar, Quasar, Burning Bright'' (1978), p. 235

* Individual science fiction [[stories]] may seem as trivial as ever to the blinder [[critics]] and [[philosophers]] of today — but the core of science fiction, its essence, the concept around which it revolves, has become crucial to our salvation if we are to be saved at all.
** &quot;My Own View&quot; in ''The Encyclopedia of Science Fiction'' (1978) edited by Robert Holdstock;&lt;small&gt; later published in ''Asimov on Science Fiction'' (1981)&lt;/small&gt;

* '''It is [[change]], continuing change, inevitable change, that is the dominant factor in society today. No sensible decision can be made any longer without taking into account not only the world as it is, but the world as it will be ...''' This, in turn, means that our statesmen, our businessmen, our everyman must take on a science fictional way of thinking.
** &quot;My Own View&quot; in ''The Encyclopedia of Science Fiction'' (1978) edited by Robert Holdstock;&lt;small&gt; later published in ''Asimov on Science Fiction'' (1981)&lt;/small&gt;

* ''Science Digest'' asked me to see the movie ''[[Close Encounters of the Third Kind]]'' and write an article for them on the science it contained. I saw the picture and was appalled. I remained appalled even after a doctor's examination had assured me that no internal organs had been shaken loose by its ridiculous soundwaves. (If you can't be good, be loud, some say, and Close Encounters was very loud.) ... Hollywood must deal with large audiences, most of whom are utterly unfamiliar with good science fiction. It has to bend to them, meet them at least half-way. Fully appreciating that, I could enjoy ''[[Planet of the Apes]]'' and ''[[Star Wars (film)|Star Wars]]''. Star Wars was entertainment for the masses and did not try to be anything more. Leave your sophistication at the door, get into the spirit, and you can have a fun ride. ... Seeing a rotten picture for the special effects is like eating a tough steak for the smothered onions, or reading a bad book for the dirty parts. Optical wizardry is something a movie can do that a book can't but it is no substitute for a story, for logic, for meaning. It is ornamentation, not substance. In fact, whenever a science fiction picture is praised overeffusively for its special effects, I know it's a bad picture. Is that all they can find to talk about?
** &quot;Editorial: The Reluctant Critic&quot;, in [https://archive.org/stream/Asimovs_v02n06_1978-11-12/ ''Isaac Asimov’s Science Fiction Magazine'', Vol. 2, Issue 6, (12 November 1978)]&lt;!-- Asimovs_v02n06_1978-11-12_djvu.txt --&gt;

* Where any answer is possible, all answers are meaningless.
** ''The Road to Infinity'' (1979), p. 170

* I simply don't think it is reasonable to use IQ tests to produce results of questionable value, which may then serve to justify racists in their own minds and to help bring about the kinds of tragedies we have already witnessed earlier in this century.
** &quot;Alas, All Human&quot; in ''Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction'', June 1979

* ''In memory yet green, in joy still felt, &lt;br /&gt; The scenes of life rise sharply into view. &lt;br /&gt; We triumph; Life’s disasters are undealt, &lt;br /&gt; And while all else is old, the world is new.''
** Poem credited to &quot;Anon&quot; within his autobiography ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), but which Asimov himself had written to provide titles to two volumes of his autobiography, after his publisher suggested he use dramatic lines from some obscure poem for a title, rather than his initial suggestion of &quot;''As I Remember''&quot;.

* I wouldn't give an astrologer the time of day.
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (Avon Books, 1979), p. 18

* '''It is surely better to be wronged than to do wrong.'''
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), p. 175

* The purpose of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aphorism aphorisms] is to keep fools who have memorised them from having nothing to say.
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), p. 188

* There is less trouble and trauma involved in writing a new piece than in trying to salvage an unsatisfactory old one.
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), p. 200

* The undramatic fact is that I just think and think and think until I have something &lt;nowiki&gt;[for a story],&lt;/nowiki&gt; and there is nothing marvelous or artistic about the phenomenon.
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), pp. 301–302

* Certain success evicts one from the paradise of winning against the odds.
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), p. 420

* '''The military mind remains unparalleled as a vehicle of creative stupidity.'''
** ''In Memory Yet Green'' (1979), p. 461

*It is very likely that there are many, many planets carrying life, even intelligent life, throughout the universe, because there are so many stars. By sheer chance, even if those chances are small, a great many life forms and a great many intelligences may exist.
**[http://americanindian.net/asimov.html Interview] in ''Southwest Airlines Magazine'' 1979)

* There is a cult of [[ignorance]] in the United States, and there always has been. '''The strain of [[anti-intellectualism]] has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that [[democracy]] means that &quot;my [[ignorance]] is just as [[good]] as your [[knowledge]].&quot; '''
** [http://media.aphelis.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/ASIMOV_1980_Cult_of_Ignorance.pdf &quot;A Cult of Ignorance&quot;], ''Newsweek'' (21 January 1980).

* I believe that every human being with a physically normal brain can learn a great deal and can be surprisingly intellectual. I believe that what we badly need is social approval of [[learning]] and social rewards for learning.&lt;br/&gt;'''We can ''all'' be members of the intellectual elite''' and then, and '''only then, will''' a phrase like &quot;America's right to know&quot; and, indeed, '''any true concept of [[democracy]], have any meaning.'''
** &quot;A Cult of Ignorance&quot;, ''Newsweek'' (21 January 1980)

* '''[Creationists] make it sound as though a &quot;theory&quot; is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.'''
** Often attributed as remarks to the [[w:National Coalition Against Censorship|National Coalition Against Censorship]] (NCAC) (1980)

* It is my own experience ... that commentators are far more ingenious at finding meaning than authors are at inserting it.
** ''The Annotated Gulliver's Travels'' (1980), p. 16

* [[w:Mort Weisinger|Weisinger]], a couple of years ago, made up the following story: &quot;Isaac Asimov was asked how [[Superman]] could fly faster than the speed of light, which was supposed to be an absolute limit. To this Asimov replied, 'That the speed of light is a limit is a theory; that Superman can travel faster than light is a fact.'&quot;
: I assure you it never happened and I never said it, but it will be repeated, I am quite certain, indefinitely, and it will probably be found in Bartlett's quotations a century from now, attributed to me, after all my writings have been forgotten.
:* &quot;Science Fiction, 1938&quot; ''Nebula Winners 14'' (1980) edited by Frederick J. Pohl, p. 97&lt;!-- Asimov on Science Fiction --&gt;

* '''When you write a short story ... you had better know the ending first.''' The end of a story is only the end to the reader. To the writer, it's the beginning. If you don't know exactly where you're going every minute you're writing, you'll never get there — or anywhere.
** ''The Casebook of the Black Widowers'' (1980), p. 177

* Necessity makes a joke of civilization.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 124

* I make no secret about being Jewish ... I just think it's more important to be human and to have a human heritage; and I think it is wrong for anyone to feel that there is anything special about any one heritage of whatever kind. It is delightful to have the human heritage exist in a thousand varieties, for it makes for greater interest, but as soon as one variety is thought to be more important than another, the groundwork is laid for destroying them all.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 147

* I am not a visual person. I have spent so many bounded years in my childhood that I have grown used to having books as my window on reality.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 217

* '''Writing is hard work. The fact that I love doing it doesn't make it less hard work.''' People who love tennis will sweat themselves to exhaustion playing it, and the love of the game doesn't stop the sweating. The casual assumption that writers are unemployed bums because they don't go to the office and don't have a boss is something every writer has to live with. I have never known a writer who hasn't suffered as a result of this, hasn't resented it, and hasn't dreamed of murdering the next person who says &quot;Boy, you've sure got it made. You just sit there and toss off a story or something whenever you feel like it.&quot;
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), pp. 229-230

* The fact is that I've never called myself a genius, and I think the term has been cheapened by overuse into meaninglessness. If other people want to call me that, that's their problem.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 255

* I joke sometimes to the effect that when I approach a part of a book where I must explain something I don't understand, I just type faster and faster and faster. Then, when I get to the part I don't understand, sheer inertia pushes me through. That's not literally true, of course, but there's something to it psychologically.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 281

* '''No matter how various the subject matter I write on, I was a science-fiction writer first and it is as a science-fiction writer that I want to be identified.'''
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), pp. 286-287

* Of all the books I have ever worked on, I think ''[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asimov%27s_Guide_to_Shakespeare Asimov's Guide to Shakespeare]'' gave me the most pleasure, day in, day out. For months and months I lived and thought Shakespeare, and I don't see how there can be any greater pleasure in the world—any pleasure, that is, that one can indulge in for as much as ten hours without pause, day after day indefinitely.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), pp. 464–465

* The best way to describe anyone is to give an example of the kind of thing he would do.
** ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 499

====1981–1992====

* People don't stop things they [[enjoy]] doing just because they reach a certain [[age]]. They don't stop playing [[tennis]] just because they turn 40, they don't stop with [[sex]] just because they turn 40; they keep it up as long as they can if they enjoy it, and [[learning]] will be the same thing.
** [https://yutu.be/Zib6OC_yJxk?t=425 interview] {{dead link}}
* '''There are many aspects of the universe that still cannot be explained satisfactorily by [[science]]; but [[ignorance]] only implies ignorance that may someday be conquered. To surrender to ignorance and call it [[God]] has always been premature, and it remains premature today.'''
** [http://www.stephenjaygould.org/ctrl/azimov_creationism.html &quot;The “Threat” of Creationism&quot;] in ''New York Times Magazine'' (14 June 1981)&lt;!-- reprinted ''Science and Creationism'' (1984) edited by M. F. Ashley Montagu, p. 184 --&gt;

* There is no version of primeval history, preceding the discoveries of modern science, that is as rational and as inspiring as that of the first eleven chapters of the Book of Genesis.
** ''In the Beginning'' (1981), introduction, p. 3

* The Bible and science agree in being unable to say anything certainly about what happened before the beginning. There is this difference. The Bible will never be able to tell us. It has reached its final form, and it simply doesn't say. Science, on the other hand, is still developing, and the time may come when it can answer questions that, at present, it cannot.
** ''In the Beginning'' (1981), p. 14&lt;!-- New English Library edition --&gt;

* If one thing goes without saying, almost anything can.
** ''In the Beginning'' (1981), p. 84

* To be sure, [[the Bible]] contains the direct words of [[God]]. How do we know? The Moral Majority says so. How do they know? They say they know and to doubt it makes you an agent of the [[Devil]] or, worse, a Lbr-l Dm-cr-t. And what does the Bible textbook say? Well, among other things it says the earth was created in 4004 BC. (Not actually, but a Moral Majority type figured that out three and a half centuries ago, and his word is also accepted as inspired.) The sun was created three days later. The first male was molded out of dirt, and the first female was molded, some time later, out of his rib. As far as the end of the universe is concerned, the Book of Revelation (6:13-14) says: &quot;And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken of a mighty wind.&quot; ... Imagine the people who believe such things and who are not ashamed to ignore, totally, all the patient findings of thinking minds through all the centuries since the Bible was written. And '''it is these ignorant people, the most uneducated, the most unimaginative, the most unthinking among us, who would make themselves the guides and leaders of us all'''; who would force their feeble and childish beliefs on us; who would invade our schools and libraries and homes in order to tell us what books to read and what not, what thoughts to think and what not, what conclusions to accept and what not. And what does the Bible say? &quot;If the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch&quot; (Matthew 15:14).
** &quot;The Blind Who Would Lead&quot;, in ''Maclean's'' 2 February 1981, reprinted in ''Opus 300'' (1984)

* But suppose we ''were'' to teach [[creationism]]. What would be the content of the teaching? Merely that a creator formed the [[universe]] and all species of life ready-made? Nothing more? No details?
** &quot;The Dangerous Myth of Creationism&quot; in ''Penthouse'' (January 1982); &lt;small&gt;reprinted as Ch. 2 : &quot;Creationism and the Schools&quot; in ''The Roving Mind'' (1983), p. 16&lt;/small&gt; &lt;!-- Buffalo, New York: Prometheus Books --&gt;

* '''I am an [[atheist]], out and out. It took me a long time to say it.''' I've been an atheist for years and years, but somehow I felt it was intellectually unrespectable to say one was an atheist, because it assumed knowledge that one didn't have. Somehow, it was better to say one was a [[humanist]] or an [[agnostic]]. '''I finally decided that I'm a creature of emotion as well as of [[reason]]. Emotionally, I am an atheist. I don't have the evidence to prove that [[God]] doesn't exist, but I so strongly suspect he doesn't that I don't want to waste my time.'''
** ''Free Inquiry'' (Spring 1982) &lt;!-- p. 9 --&gt;

* Earth is a ball that is over 12,000 kilometres in diameter, and if it were modelled into an object the size of a billiard ball, with all its surface unevenness reproduced exactly to scale, the model would be ''smoother'' than an ordinary billiard ball—and the ocean would be an all but unnoticeable mist of dampness over 70 percent of its surface.
** ''Exploring the Earth and the Cosmos'' (1982), p. 85

* An optimistic view of the future would indicate that before long, the clear necessity of expanding humanity's horizons would cause ... space settlements to be built. The construction would also serve as a great project that not only would be clearly of great benefit, but might induce human cooperation in something large enough to fire the heart and mind, and make people forget the petty quarrels that have engaged them for thousands of years in wars over insignificant scraps of earthly territory.
** ''Exploring the Earth and the Cosmos'' (1982), p. 153

* [S]cientists have pushed back the horizon of time from the biblical 6,000 years to 4,600,000,000 years for the age of Earth—a 760,000-fold increase.
** ''Exploring the Earth and the Cosmos'' (1982), p. 209

* There were many more stories in the course of the year that were printed and that dealt with the nuclear nightmare, and who knows how many stories that were written and were never published. It was an overriding terror in the years that immediately followed Hiroshima; and it is only the callousness of habituation that hasn’t caused the terror to increase steadily—for the danger has.
** Introduction to [[Theodore Sturgeon]]’s story ''Thunder and Roses'' in ''Isaac Asimov Presents The Golden Years of Science Fiction, Fifth Series'' (1983), &lt;small&gt; {{ISBN|0-517-475669}} (in the 1985 hardcover reprint), &lt;/small&gt; pp. 343-344

* It is a rather sad commentary on humanity that it is always so attractive to think that some small group “controls the Earth”—the Jews, the international bankers, the Communists, the Masons, the Trilateral Commission. Those who believe such things are so sincere, so harried, so paranoid and, if the times are bad enough, and if the hunger for a scapegoat is great enough—so convincing. The Nazis are the most dreadful example in recent history of how far madmen can go when riding the skeletal horse of paranoia, but their example has by no means cured the world.
** Introduction to [[Henry Kuttner]]’s story ''Don’t Look Now'' in ''Isaac Asimov Presents The Golden Years of Science Fiction, Fifth Series'' (1983) &lt;small&gt; {{ISBN|0-517-475669}} (in the 1985 hardcover reprint), &lt;/small&gt; pp. 367-368

* Are there things about the universe that we cannot know in the usual way of observing and measuring, but that we can know in some other way—intuition, revelation, mad insight? If so, how can you know that what you know in these non-knowing ways is really so. Anything you know without knowing, others can know only on your flat statement without any proof other than “I know!”
** Introduction to [[w:John R. Pierce|J. J. Coupling]]’s story ''Period Piece'' in ''Isaac Asimov Presents The Golden Years of Science Fiction, Fifth Series'' (1983), &lt;small&gt; {{ISBN|0-517-475669 (in the 1985 hardcover reprint)}}, &lt;/small&gt; pp. 523-524

* I get a certain pleasure in knowing that I live not merely in a city but in Manhattan, the center of New York City, a region so unique in many ways that I honestly believe that Earth is divided into halves: Manhattan and non-Manhattan.
** ''Science: Dead Center,'' in ''[[w:The Magazine of Fantasy &amp; Science Fiction|F&amp;SF]]'' (April 1983), p. 130

* Consider the most famous pure dystopian tale of modern times, ''1984'', by [[George Orwell]] (1903-1950), published in 1948 (the same year in which ''[[w: Walden Two|Walden Two]]'' was published). I consider it an abominably poor book. It made a big hit (in my opinion) only because it rode the tidal wave of cold war sentiment in the United States.
** &quot;Nowhere!&quot; ''Asimov's Science Fiction'' (September 1983)

* Miniaturization doesn't actually make sense unless you miniaturize the very atoms of which matter is composed. Otherwise a tiny brain in a man the size of an insect, composed of normal atoms, is composed of too few atoms for the miniaturized man to be any more intelligent than the ant. Also, miniaturizing atoms is impossible according to the rules of quantum mechanics.
**As quoted in ''Omni's Screen Flights/Screen Fantasies'' (1984) edited by Danny Peary, p. 5

* Titles are an important part of a story and I take considerable care in choosing one. In fact, I cannot start a story until I have chosen a title.
** ''Banquets of the Black Widowers'' (1984), p. 27

* Once you've dissected a joke, you're about where you are when you've dissected a frog. It's dead.
** ''Banquets of the Black Widowers'' (1984), p. 49; comparable to &quot;Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind.&quot; — [[E. B. White]], in &quot;Some Remarks on Humor,&quot; preface to A Subtreasury of American Humor (1941)

* In my fiction I am careful to make everything probable and to tie up all loose ends. Real life is not hampered by such considerations.
** ''Puzzles of the Black Widowers'' (1984), p. 132

* Science fiction offers its writers chances of embarrassment that no other form of fiction does.
** ''Robot Dreams'' (1986), introduction

* There is more to a science fiction story than the science it contains. There is also the ''story''.
** ''Robot Dreams'' (1986), introduction

* '''There are limits beyond which your folly will not carry you.''' I am glad of that. In fact, I am relieved.
** Doctor Susan Calvin in &quot;Robot Dreams&quot; in ''Robot Dreams'' (1986)

* '''The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!', but 'That's funny ...' '''
:* Attributed in the &quot;quote of the day&quot; source code of the “Fortune” computer program (June 1987); more at [https://quoteinvestigator.com/2015/03/02/eureka-funny/ &quot;The Most Exciting Phrase in Science Is Not ‘Eureka!’ But ‘That’s funny …’&quot; at ''Quote Investigator'']

* All life is nucleic acid; the rest is commentary
** &quot;Beginning with Bone&quot; (May 1987), reprinted in ''The Relativity of Wrong'' (1988)

* I suppose he's entitled to his opinion, but I don't suppose it very hard.
** “Seven Steps to Grand Master” in ''Nebula Awards 22'' (1988), edited by George Zebrowski

* Good literature, all if it, is supposed to illuminate the human condition.
** Interview by Richard Heffner on ''The Open Mind'' (19 June 1988); [https://www.thirteen.org/openmind-archive/history/asimov-at-391/ video (15:02)]

* Of all the cultural aspects of humanity, the only one which is not broken up into national or regional splinters is science. Different nations have different languages, they may have different religions, may have different dietaries, may have different holidays, different ways of thinking, but here’s only one science.
** Interview by Richard Heffner on ''The Open Mind'' (19 June 1988); [https://www.thirteen.org/openmind-archive/history/asimov-at-391/ video (25:31)]

* ''[In response to this question by [[w:Bill Moyers|Bill Moyers]]: What do you see happening to the [[idea]] of [[dignity]] to human species if this population growth continues at its present rate?]'' &quot;It's going to destroy it all. I use what I call my bathroom metaphor. If two people live in an apartment, and there are two bathrooms, then both have what I call freedom of the bathroom, go to the bathroom any time you want, and stay as long as you want to for whatever you need. And this to my way is ideal. And everyone believes in the freedom of the bathroom. It should be right there in the Constitution. But if you have 20 people in the apartment and two bathrooms, no matter how much every person believes in freedom of the bathroom, there is no such thing. You have to set up, you have to set up times for each person, you have to bang at the door, aren't you through yet, and so on. And in the same way, '''[[democracy]] cannot survive overpopulation. Human dignity cannot survive it. Convenience and decency cannot survive it.''' As you put more and more people onto the world, the value of life not only declines, but it disappears. It doesn't matter if someone dies.
** Interview by [[Bill Moyers]] on ''Bill Moyers' World Of Ideas'' (17 October 1988); [http://www.pbs.org/moyers/faithandreason/print/pdfs/woi%20asimov1.pdf transcript] (page 6) - [http://www.pbs.org/moyers/faithandreason/media_players/asimovwoi_audio.html audio (20:12)]

* '''[[Science]] doesn't purvey absolute truth.''' Science is a mechanism. It's a way of trying to improve your knowledge of nature. '''It's a system for testing your thoughts against the universe and seeing whether they match.''' And this works, not just for the ordinary aspects of science, but for all of life. I should think people would want to know that what they know is truly what the universe is like, or at least as close as they can get to it.
** Interview by [[Bill Moyers]] on ''Bill Moyers' World Of Ideas'' (21 October 1988); [http://www-tc.pbs.org/moyers/faithandreason/print/pdfs/woi%20asimov2.pdf transcript] (pages 5-6)

* The Law of conservation of energy tells us we can't get something for nothing, but we refuse to believe it.
** ''Book of Science and Nature Quotations'' (1988)

* '''The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers [[wisdom]].'''
**''Isaac Asimov's Book of Science and Nature Quotations'' (1988), edited with Jason A. Shulman, p. 281&lt;!-- New York: Weidenfeld &amp; Nicolson --&gt;

* As indicated by our very name, we [[humanists]] celebrate [[humanity]], want humanity to survive, and recognize that if humanity does survive, it will be by its own efforts. Never can we sit back and wait for miracles to save us. Miracles don't happen. Sweat happens. Effort happens. Thought happens. And it is up to us humanists to help — to expend our sweat, our effort and our thought. Then there will be hope for the world.
** Essay in ''Humanist'' magazine (September/October 1989)

* '''All mankind, right down to those you most despise, are your neighbors.'''
** &quot;Lost in Non-Translation&quot; (1989), in ''Magic'' (Voyager, 1997) p. 270

* '''We are meant to know, or we are amoebae.''' &lt;br /&gt; Suppose that we are wise enough to learn and know — and yet not wise enough to control our learning and knowledge, so that we use it to destroy ourselves? &lt;br /&gt; Even if that is so, knowledge remains better than ignorance. '''It is better to know — even if the knowledge endured only for the [[moment]] that comes before destruction — than to gain eternal life at the price of a dull and swinish lack of comprehension of a universe that swirls unseen before us in all its wonder.''' That was the choice of [[Achilles]], and it is mine, too.
** ''[[w:The New Hugo Winners|The New Hugo Winners: Award-winning Science Fiction Stories]]'' Vol. 1 (1989)&lt;!-- Afterword to &quot;Speech Sounds&quot; --&gt;, p. 215

* '''I made up my mind long ago to follow one cardinal rule in all my writing — to be ''clear''.''' I have given up all thought of writing poetically or symbolically or experimentally, or in any of the other modes that might (if I were good enough) get me a Pulitzer prize. I would write merely clearly and in this way establish a warm relationship between myself and my readers, and the professional critics — Well, they can do whatever they wish.
** Introduction to ''[[w:Nemesis (Isaac Asimov novel)|Nemesis]]'' (1989)

*'''[Writing] is an addiction more powerful than alcohol, than nicotine, than crack.''' I could not conceive of not writing.
**''Isaac Asimov's Science Fiction Magazine'', April 1990, p.6

* Radiation, unlike smoking, drinking, and overeating, gives no pleasure, so the possible victims object.
** As quoted in ''The Journal of NIH Research'' (1990), 2, 30

* Books ... hold within them the gathered wisdom of humanity, the collected knowledge of the world's thinkers, the amusement and excitement built up by the imaginations of brilliant people. Books contain humor, beauty, wit, emotion, thought, and, indeed, all of life. Life without books is empty.
** Puzzles of the Black Widowers (1990), pp. 74-75

* The foundation of all [[technology]] is [[fire]].
** ''Asimov's Chronology of the World'' (1991), p. 11

* '''If anyone can be considered the greatest writer who ever lived, it is [[Shakespeare]].'''
** ''Asimov's Chronology of the World'' (1991), p. 226

* Scientific theories can always be improved and ''are '' improved. That is one of the glories of science. It is the authoritarian view of the Universe that is frozen in stone and cannot be changed, so that once it is wrong, it is wrong forever.
** &quot;The Nearest Star&quot; (1989) (reprinted in ''The Secret of the Universe'' (1992), p. 82)

* It's my belief that the Universe possesses, in its essence, [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fractal_dimension fractal] properties of a very complex sort and that the pursuit of science shares those properties. It follows that any part of the Universe that remains un-understood, and any part of scientific investigation that remains unresolved, however small that might be in comparison to what is understood and resolved, contains within it all the complexity of the original. Therefore, we'll never finish. No matter how far we go, the road ahead will be as long as it was at the start, and that's the secret of the Universe.
** &quot;The Secrets of the Universe&quot; (1989) (essay reprinted in ''The Secret of the Universe'' (1992), p. 167)

* '''The job of science will never be done, it will just sink deeper and deeper into never-ending complexity.'''
** &quot;The Secrets of the Universe&quot; (1989) (essay reprinted in ''The Secret of the Universe'' (1992), p. 168)

* '''Ideas are cheap. It's only what you do with them that counts.'''
** &quot;The Secrets of the Universe&quot; (1989) (essay reprinted in ''The Secret of the Universe'' (1992), p. 167)

* Someone once asked me, &quot;If you had your choice, Dr. Asimov, would it be women or writing?&quot; My answer was, &quot;Well, I can write for twelve hours at a time without getting tired.&quot;
** &quot;Just Say 'No!'&quot; (1989) (reprinted in ''The Secret of the Universe'' (1992), p. 235)

* In the course of my fight with the school, I couldn't help but notice that I became a pariah. [...] Once, however, a fellow faculty member, making sure we were unobserved, said to me, &quot;Isaac, the faculty is proud of you for your courage in fighting the administration for academic freedom.&quot;&lt;br&gt;I said, &quot;There's no courage involved in it. Don't you know my definition of academic freedom?&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;No. What's your definition of academic freedom?&quot;&lt;br&gt;I said, &quot;Independent income.&quot;
** No. 499, ''[https://archive.org/details/asimovlaughsagai00isaa/page/254/mode/1up Asimov Laughs Again]'' (1992)
** Regarding his [[w:Isaac_Asimov#Education_and_career|difficulties]] with his department at the [[w:Boston University School of Medicine|Boston University School of Medicine]].

* I was once being interviewed by [[Barbara Walters]] [...] In between two of the segments she asked me [...] &quot;But what would you do if the doctor gave you only six months to live?&quot; I said, &quot;Type faster.&quot; This was widely quoted, but the &quot;six months&quot; was changed to &quot;six minutes,&quot; which bothered me. It's &quot;six months.&quot;
** No. 255, ''Asimov Laughs Again'' (1992)

====Undated====
* If you suspect that my interest in [[the Bible]] is going to inspire me with sudden enthusiasm for [[Judaism]] and make me a convert of mountain‐moving fervor and that I shall suddenly grow long earlocks and learn Hebrew and go about denouncing the heathen — you little know the effect of the Bible on me. '''Properly read, it is the most potent force for atheism ever conceived.'''
** As quoted in ''Notes for a Memoir : On Isaac Asimov, Life, and Writing'' (2006) by Janet Jeppson Asimov, p. 58

* I don't believe in an afterlife, so I don't have to spend my whole life fearing hell, or fearing heaven even more. For whatever the tortures of hell, I think the boredom of heaven would be even worse.
** As quoted in ''Philosophy on the Go'' (2007) by Joey Green, p. 222

=== [[w:Three Laws of Robotics|The Three Laws of Robotics]] (1942) ===
[[File:Android.jpg|thumb|right|A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.]]
&lt;!-- [[File:I robot.jpg|thumb|right|A robot may not injure humanity, or, through inaction, allow humanity to come to harm.]] --&gt;

;The First Law of Robotics
* '''A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.'''
** &quot;Runaround&quot; in ''Astounding Science Fiction'' (March 1942); later published in '' I, Robot'' (1950)
; The Second Law of Robotics
* '''A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.'''
** &quot;Runaround&quot; in ''Astounding Science Fiction'' (March 1942); later published in '' I, Robot'' (1950)

;The Third Law of Robotics
* '''A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.'''
** &quot;Runaround&quot; in ''Astounding Science Fiction'' (March 1942); later published in '' I, Robot'' (1950)

; The Zeroth Law of Robotics:
:&lt;small&gt;Later included among these laws as a more fundamental directive&lt;/small&gt;
* '''A robot may not injure humanity, or, through inaction, allow humanity to come to harm.'''
** ''[[w:Robots and Empire|Robots and Empire]]'' (1985); a variant of this first occurred in ''[[W:The Evitable Conflict|The Evitable Conflict]]'' (1950) as: '''No robot may harm humanity, or through inaction, allow humanity to come to harm.'''

=== Short fiction ===

==== ''[[w:The Early Asimov|The Early Asimov Book One]]'' (1972) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Page numbers from the mass market paperback edition, published by Fawcett Crest in June 1974 &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; See [http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?5 Isaac Asimov's Internet Science Fiction Database page] for original publication details &lt;/small&gt;

* If the love of money is the root of all evil, the need of money is most certainly the root of all despair.
** ''Half-Breed'' (p. 160)

* Earth governments in moments of stress are not famous for being reasonable.
** ''History'' (p. 297)

==== ''[[w:The Early Asimov|The Early Asimov Book Two]]'' (1972) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Page numbers from the mass market paperback edition, published by Fawcett Crest in December 1974 (second printing) &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; See [http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?5 Isaac Asimov's Internet Science Fiction Database page] for original publication details &lt;/small&gt;

* “But you really are, you know.” This was said with intense earnestness. “I mean good, ''really'' good. I think it is wonderful to be an author like you. It must be almost like being God.”&lt;br&gt;Graham stared blankly. “Not to editors, sister.”&lt;br&gt;Sister didn’t get the whisper. She continued, “To be able to create living characters out of nothing; to unfold souls to all the world; to put thoughts into words; to build pictures and create worlds. I have often thought that an author was the most gloriously gifted person in all creation. Better an inspired author starving in a garret than a king upon his throne. Don’t you think so?”&lt;br&gt;“Definitely,” lied Graham.
** ''Author! Author!'' (p. 130)

* “Things in the past always seem greater.” Brand condescended with a smile. “There is a theorem to that effect which you’ll find in any elementary text. Freshmen invariably call it the ‘GOD Theorem.’ Stands for ‘Good-Old-Days,’ you know. But go on.”&lt;br&gt;Theor frowned at the digression. He hid the beginning of a sneer. “You can always dismiss an uncomfortable fact by pinning a dowdy label to it.”
** ''Death Sentence'' (p. 158)

* Modesty is an unnatural attitude, and one which is only with difficulty taught to children.
** ''Mother Earth'' (p. 265)

* Self-preservation has frequently knuckled under to that tremendous yearning to ‘get even.’
** ''Mother Earth'' (p. 293)

==== ''[[w:Azazel (Asimov)|Azazel]]'' (1988) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Page numbers from the mass market paperback edition, published by Bantam Spectra in February 1990, {{ISBN|0-553-28339-1}}, (first printing) &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; See [http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?5 Isaac Asimov's Internet Science Fiction Database page] or the [[w:Azazel (Asimov)|Wikipedia page]] for original publication details &lt;/small&gt;

* What a human being believes, however, no matter with what ardor, is not necessarily objective truth.
** ''The Dim Rumble'' (p. 47)

* “The evil drink does,” said George, with a heavily alcoholic sigh, “would be hard to assess.”&lt;br&gt;“Not if you were sober,” I said.
** ''The Evil Drink Does'' (p. 77)

* “An accent?”&lt;br&gt;“Substandard English. Foreigners who have not learned the language as infants but who pick it up in later life invariably mispronounce the vowels, miss out on word order, break up the grammar, and so on.”&lt;br&gt;A look of sheer horror crossed Azazel’s tiny face. “But that’s a capital offense,” he said.&lt;br&gt;“Not on this world,” I said. “It should be, but it isn’t.”
** ''Logic is Logic'' (p. 124)

* “You clearly know nothing at all about economics, old fellow.”&lt;br&gt;“Neither do economists, George,” I said.
** ''More Things in Heaven and Earth'' (p. 156)

* “He seemed so pleasant, so friendly, so grateful for little favors. How could I know that underneath it all he was a vicious, libelous hellhound.”&lt;br&gt;George said, “But he was a critic. How could he be anything else? You train for the post by maligning your mother.”
** ''The Mind’s Construction'' (p. 168)

* “Arrange for the statue to come to life while we are watching, and make sure that it is terribly in love with Elderberry.”&lt;br&gt;“Love is easy. That’s just a matter of adjusting hormones.”
** ''Galatea'' (p. 202)

==== ''[[w:The Complete Stories (Asimov)|The Complete Stories, Volume 1]]'' (1990) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Page numbers from the trade paperback edition, published by Broadway Books in 2001, {{ISBN|0-385-41627-X}}, (11th printing) &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; See [http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?5 Isaac Asimov's Internet Science Fiction Database page] for original publication details &lt;/small&gt;

* He could almost wish he were [[Superstition|superstitious]]. He could then console himself with the thought that the casual meaningless meeting had really been directed by a knowing and purposeful [[Fate]].
** ''The Dead Past'' (p. 7)

* “Surely you believe in [[God]]?”&lt;br&gt;“Well, said R.E., “I believed a lot of things about Him that would probably startle you.”
** ''The Last Trump'' (p. 114)

* We face [[eternity]] now. We have no universe left, no outside phenomena, no emotions, no passions. Nothing but ourselves and thought. We face an eternity of introspection, when all through history we have never known what to do with ourselves on a rainy Sunday.
** ''The Last Trump'' (p. 118; perhaps echoing [[Susan Ertz]] in ''Anger in the Sky'' (1943): Millions long for immortality who don’t know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.)

* The Dantean conceptions of [[w:Inferno (Dante)|Inferno]] were childish and unworthy of the Divine imagination: fire and torture. [[Boredom]] is much more subtle. The inner torture of a mind unable to escape itself in any way, condemned to fester in its own exuding mental pus for all time, is much more fitting. Oh, yes, my friend, we have been judged, and condemned, too, and this is not [[Heaven]], but [[hell]].
** ''The Last Trump'' (p. 118)

* “Why didn’t people just use a [[Computers|computer]]?”&lt;br&gt;“That was before they had computers,” cried Paul.&lt;br&gt;“Before?”&lt;br&gt;“Sure. Do you think people always had computers? Didn’t you ever hear of cavemen?”
** ''Someday'' (p. 142)

* Printing will tell you such useful things and such interesting things that not being able to read would be as bad as not being able to see.
** ''Profession'' (p. 170)

* I don’t say it was deliberate fraud. He was probably madly sincere, and sincerely mad.
** ''The Dying Night'' (p. 225)

* “If you can see the future –”&lt;br&gt;“Why am I not the richest man on earth? Is that it? But I am rich—in all I want. You want recognition and I want to be left alone. I do my work. No one bothers me. That makes me a billionaire.”
** ''Spell My Name with an S'' (pp. 279-280)

* The newsmen were writing down sentences busily as Hoskins spoke to them. They did not understand and they were sure their readers would not, but it sounded scientific and that was what counted.
** ''The Ugly Little Boy'' (pp. 313-314)

* “You are an important man–”&lt;br&gt;Ralston snorted.&lt;br&gt;“You do not consider that to be so?” asked Blaustein.&lt;br&gt;“No, I don’t. There are no important men, any more than there are important individual bacteria.”&lt;br&gt;“I don’t understand.”&lt;br&gt;“I don’t expect you to.”
** ''“Breeds There a Man…?”'' (p. 416)

* Psychiatry is becoming too popular. Everybody talks of complexes and neuroses and psychoses and compulsions and whatnot. One man’s guilt complex is another man’s good night’s sleep.
** ''“Breeds There a Man…?”'' (p. 419)

* Look around you. Look at the planet, Earth. What kind of a ridiculous animal are we to be lords of the world after the dinosaurs had failed? Sure, we’re intelligent, but what’s [[intelligence]]? We think it is important because we have it. If the Tyrannosaurus could have picked out the one quality that he thought would ensure species domination, it would be size and strength. And he would make a better case for it. He lasted longer than we are likely to.
** ''“Breeds There a Man…?”'' (pp. 420-421)

* It is no one’s privilege to despise another. It is only a hard-won right after long experience.
** ''C-Chute'' (p. 465)

* It’s funny the respectable names you can give to [[superstition]].
** ''Flies'' (p. 519)

==== ''[[w:The Complete Stories (Asimov)|The Complete Stories, Volume 2]]'' (1992) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Page numbers from the hardcover edition, published by Doubleday and the Science Fiction Book Club &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; See [http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?5 Isaac Asimov's Internet Science Fiction Database page] for original publication details &lt;/small&gt;

* “That’s The Goose,” he said. The way he said it, I could hear the capitals.&lt;br&gt;I stared at it. It looked like any other [[Geese|goose]], fat, self-satisfied and short-tempered.
** ''Pâté de Foie Gras'' (p. 266)

* “Curing diabetes is just a detail and it will merely mean that the death rate will go down slightly and produce just a bit more pressure in the direction of population increase. I’m not interested in achieving that.”&lt;br&gt;“You don’t value human life?”&lt;br&gt;“Not infinitely. There are too many people on earth.”&lt;br&gt;“I know that some think so.”&lt;br&gt;“You’re one of them, Mr. Secretary. You have written articles saying so. And it’s obvious to any thinking man—to you more than anyone—what it’s doing. [[Overpopulation]] means discomfort, and to reduce the discomfort private choice must disappear. Crowd enough people into a field and the only way they can all sit down is for all to sit down at the same time. Make a mob dense enough and they can move from one point to another quickly only by marching in formation. That is what men are becoming; a blindly marching mob knowing nothing about where it is going or why.”
** ''The Greatest Asset'' (p. 467)

* It built itself up endlessly, like a chess game, and the telemetrists began to use a computer to program the computer that designed the program for the computer that programmed the robot-controlling computer. 
** ''Stranger in Paradise'' (p. 516)

* “Nobody in the [[government]],” said Edwards stubbornly, “seems to care whether we reach the bottom of the matter or not.”&lt;br&gt;“I’ve already explained that there have been no consequences but good ones. Why stir the mud at the bottom, when the water above is clear?”
** ''The Tercentenary Incident'' (p. 625)

=== [[w:Robot series|''Robot'' series]] (1950-1985) ===

==== ''[[w:I, Robot|I, Robot]]'' (1950) ====
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the 1983 Del Rey mass market paperback edition, {{ISBN|0-345-31482-4}} &lt;/small&gt;

* “Fifty years,” I hackneyed, “is a long time.” &lt;br /&gt; “Not when you’re looking back at them,” she said. “You wonder how they vanished so quickly.”
** “Introduction”, p. 8

* “Nonsense,” Weston denied, with an involuntary nervous shiver. “That’s completely ridiculous. We had a long discussion at the time we bought Robbie about the First Law of Robotics. You ''know'' that it is impossible for a robot to harm a human being; that long before enough can go wrong to alter that First Law, a robot would be completely inoperable. It’s a mathematical impossibility. Besides I have an engineer from U.S. Robots here twice a year to give the poor gadget a complete overhaul. Why, there’s no more chance of anything at all going wrong with Robbie than there is of you or I suddenly going looney—considerably less, in fact.”
** “Robbie”, p. 17

* There's nothing like deduction. We've determined everything about our problem but the solution.
** “Runaround”, p. 41; see above for the Three Laws of Robotics, also drawn from this story

* I accept nothing on authority. A hypothesis must be backed by reason, or else it is worthless.
** “Reason”, p. 52

* “'''You can prove anything you want by coldly logical reason—if you pick the proper postulates.''' We have ours and Cutie [robot QT-1] has his.”&lt;br&gt;“Then let’s get at those postulates in a hurry. The storm’s due tomorrow.”&lt;br&gt;Powell sighed wearily. “That’s where everything falls down. Postulates are based on assumptions and adhered to by faith. Nothing in the Universe can shake them. ...”
**“Reason”, p. 63
** Originally published in [https://archive.org/details/sim_astounding-science-fiction_1941-04_27_2/page/42/mode/2up?view=theater Astounding Science Fiction April 1941, p. 43]

* The unwritten motto of United States Robot and Mechanical Men Corp. was well-known: “No employee makes the same mistake twice. He is fired the first time.”
** “Catch That Rabbit”, p. 65

* Just you think first, and don't bother to speak afterward, either.
** “Catch That Rabbit”, p. 71

* Milton Ashe is not the type to marry a head of hair and a pair of eyes.
** “Liar!”, p. 89

* Francis Quinn was a politician of the new school. That, of course, is a meaningless expression, as are all expressions of the sort. Most of the “new schools” we have were duplicated in the social life of ancient Greece, and perhaps, if we knew more about it, in the social life of ancient Sumeria and in the lake dwellings of prehistoric Switzerland as well.
** “Evidence”, p. 148

* “You’re the U. S. Robot’s psychologist, aren’t you?” &lt;br /&gt; ''“Robo''psychologist, please.” &lt;br /&gt; “Oh, are robots so different from men, mentally?” &lt;br /&gt; “Worlds different.” She allowed herself a frosty smile, “Robots are essentially decent.”
** “Evidence”, p. 151

* “There’s danger of violence?”&lt;br&gt;“The Fundamentalists threaten it, so I suppose there is, in a theoretical sense. But I don’t really expect it. The Fundies have no real power. They’re just the continuous irritant factor that might stir up a riot after a while.”
** “Evidence”, p. 165

* The machine is only a tool after all, which can help humanity progress faster by taking some of the burdens of calculations and interpretations off its back. The task of the human brain remains what it has always been; that of discovering new data to be analyzed, and of devising new concepts to be tested.
** “The Evitable Conflict”, p. 187

* There is nothing so eternally adhesive as the memory of power.
** “The Evitable Conflict”, p. 189

* &quot;Why, Stephen, if I am right, it means that the Machine is conducting our future for us not only simply in direct answer to our direct questions, but in general answer to the world situation and to human psychology as a whole. And to know that may make us unhappy and may hurt our pride. The Machine cannot, ''must'' not, make us unhappy. &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Stephen, how do we know what the ultimate good of Humanity will entail? We haven't at ''our'' disposal the infinite factors that the Machine has at ''its''! Perhaps, to give you a not unfamiliar example, our entire technical civilization has created more unhappiness and misery than it has removed. Perhaps an agrarian or pastoral civilization, with less culture and less people would be better. If so, the Machines must move in that direction, preferably without telling us, since in our ignorant prejudices we only know that what we are used to, is good—and we would then fight change. Or perhaps a complete urbanization, or a completely caste-ridden society, or complete anarchy, is the answer. We don't know. Only the Machines know, and they are going there and taking us with them.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;But you are telling me, Susan, that the 'Society for Humanity' is right; and that Mankind ''has'' lost its own say in its future.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;It never had any, really. It was always at the mercy of economic and sociological forces it did not understand—at the whims of climate, and the fortunes of war. Now the Machines understand them; and no one can stop them, since the Machines will deal with them as they are dealing with the Society,—having, as they do, the greatest of weapons at their disposal, the absolute control of our economy.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;How horrible!&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Perhaps how wonderful! Think, that for all time, all conflicts are finally evitable. Only the Machines, from now on, are inevitable!&quot;
** “The Evitable Conflict”, p. 192

==== ''[[w:The Caves of Steel|The Caves of Steel]]'' (1954) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Numerous editions. All page numbers here are from the omnibus hardcover book club edition published by Doubleday &lt;/small&gt;

* Men grew desperate and the border between bitter frustration and wild destruction is sometimes easily crossed.
** Chapter 2, “Round Trip on an Expressway” (p. 22)

* The division between human and robot is perhaps not as significant as that between intelligence and nonintelligence.
** Chapter 3, “Incident at a Shoe Counter” (pp. 29-30)

* It was the addition of status that brought the little things: a more comfortable seat here, a better cut of meat there, a shorter wait in line at the other place. To the philosophical mind, these items might seem scarcely worth any great trouble to acquire.&lt;br&gt;Yet no one, however philosophical, could give up those privileges, ''once acquired,'' without a pang. That was the point.
** Chapter 9, “Elucidation by a Spacer” (p. 85)

* “How does it concern you people? It’s our problem. We’ll solve it. If not, it’s our own particular road to hell.”&lt;br&gt;“Better your own road to hell than another’s road to heaven, eh?”
** Chapter 9, “Elucidation by a Spacer” (p. 90)

* “Logically, developing children are carefully screened for physical and mental defects before being allowed to mature.”&lt;br&gt;Baley interrupted. “You mean you kill them if they don’t—”&lt;br&gt;“If they don’t measure up. Quite painlessly, I assure you. The notion shocks you, just as the Earthman’s uncontrolled breeding shocks us.”
** Chapter 9, “Elucidation by a Spacer” (p. 91)

* I tell you I know the type of people that become Medievalists. They’re soft, dreamy people who find life too hard for them here and get lost in an ideal world of the past that never really existed.
** Chapter 13, “Shift to a Machine” (p. 141)

* Remember, you once said, Lije, that people sometimes mistake their own shortcomings for those of society and want to fix the Cities because they don’t know how to fix themselves.
** Chapter 14, “Power of a Name” (p. 148)

* There are degrees of justice, Elijah. When the lesser is incompatible with the greater, the lesser must give way.
** Chapter 17, “Conclusion of a Project” (p. 184)

* I have been trying, friend Julius, to understand some remarks Elijah made to me earlier. Perhaps I am beginning to, for it suddenly seems to me that the destruction of what should not be, that is, the destruction of what you people call evil, is less just and desirable than the conversion of this evil into what you call good.&lt;br&gt;He hesitated, then, almost as though he were surprised at his own words, he said, “Go, and sin no more!”
** Chapter 18, “End of an Investigation” (p. 202)

==== ''[[w:The Naked Sun|The Naked Sun]]'' (1957) ====
:&lt;small&gt; Numerous editions. All page numbers here are from the omnibus hardcover book club edition published by Doubleday &lt;/small&gt;

* A robot, the man had said, is logical but not reasonable.
** Chapter 6, “A Theory is Refuted” (p. 265)

* Civilizations have always been pyramidal in structure. As one climbs toward the apex of the social edifice, there is increased leisure and increasing opportunity to pursue happiness. As one climbs, one finds also fewer and fewer people to enjoy this more and more. Invariably, there is a preponderance of the dispossessed. And remember this, no matter how well off the bottom layers of the pyramid might be on an absolute scale, they are always dispossessed in comparison with the apex.&lt;br&gt;So there is always social friction in ordinary human societies. The action of social revolution and the reaction of guarding against such revolution or combating it once it has begun are the causes of a great deal of the human misery with which history is permeated.
** Chapter 10, “A Culture is Traced” (p. 312)

* There isn’t an instinct around that can’t give way to a good, persistent education. Not in human beings, where instincts are weak anyway. In fact, if you go about it right, education gets easier with each generation.
** Chapter 12, “A Target is Missed” (p. 331)

* “Ah, the future good!” Leebig’s eyes glowed with passion and he seemed to grow less conscious of his listener and correspondingly more talkative. “A simple concept, you think. How many human beings are willing to accept a trifling inconvenience for the sake of a large future good? How long does it take to train a child that what tastes good now means a stomach-ache later, and what tastes bad now will correct the stomach-ache later? Yet you want a robot to be able to understand?”
** Chapter 13, “A Roboticist is Confronted” (p. 346)

* “Is that important?”&lt;br&gt;“Everything is important till proven otherwise.”
** Chapter 14, “A Motive is Revealed” (p. 356)

* Genes aren’t everything. Environment counts too, and environment can bend into actual psychosis where genes indicate only a potentiality for a particular psychosis.
** Chapter 16, “A Solution is Offered” (p. 373)

* Without the interplay of human against human, the chief interest in life is gone; most of the intellectual values are gone; most of the reason for living is gone.
** Chapter 18, “A Question is Answered” (p. 398)

* Anything could be found in figures if the search were long enough and hard enough and if the proper pieces of information were ignored or overlooked.
** Chapter 18, “A Question is Answered” (p. 399)

* Victories over ingrained patterns of thought are not won in a day or a year.
** Chapter 18, “A Question is Answered” (p. 402)

==== ''[[w:The Robots of Dawn|The Robots of Dawn]]'' (1983) ====

* Goodbye, friend Elijiah, and remember that, although people apply the phrase to Aurora, it is, from this point on, Earth itself that is the true World of the Dawn.
** Chapter 19 &quot;Again Baley&quot;, part 5 (p. 423), R. Giskard Reventlov

==== ''[[w:Robots and Empire|Robots and Empire]]'' (1985) ====

* The work of each individual contributes to a totality and so becomes an undying part of the totality. That totality of human lives - past and present and to come - forms a tapestry that has been in existence now for many thousands of years and has been growing more elaborate and, on the whole, more beautiful in all that time. Even the Spacers are an offshoot of the tapestry and they, too, add to the elaborateness and beauty of the pattern. An individual life is one thread in the tapestry and what is one thread compared to the whole?
** Chapter 10 &quot;After the Speech&quot;, part 1 (p. 213), Elijiah Baley to R. Daneel Olivaw, the roots of the Zeroth Law

* Daneel rose. He was alone - and with a Galaxy to care for.
** Chapter 19 &quot;Alone&quot; part 1 (p. 436)

=== [[w:Galactic Empire (series)|''Empire'' novels]] (1950–1952) ===

==== ''[[w:Pebble in the Sky|Pebble in the Sky]]'' (1950) ====
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the 1964 Bantam Pathfinder mass market paperback edition, 6th printing &lt;/small&gt;

* The same man who could not find it in his conscience to curb his curiosity into the nuclear studies that might someday kill half of Earth would risk his life to save that of an unimportant fellow man.
** Chapter 1 &quot;Between One Footsep and the Next&quot; (p. 6)

* To the rest of the Galaxy, if they are aware of us at all, Earth is but a pebble in the sky. To us it is home, and all the home we know.
** Chapter 4 “The Royal Road” (p. 33)

* It is because you yourself fear the propaganda created, after all, only by the stupidity of your own bigots.
** Chapter 4 “The Royal Road” (p. 33)

* There can never be a man so lost as one who is lost in the vast and intricate corrdiors of his own lonely mind, where none may reach and none may save. There never was a man so helpless as one who cannot remember.
** Chapter 5 &quot;The Involuntary Volunteer&quot; (p. 57)

* There was no denying that he would always be conscious of the fact that an Earthman was an Earthman. He couldn’t help that. That was the result of a childhood immersed in an atmosphere of bigotry so complete that it was almost invisible, so entire that you accepted its axioms as second nature. Then you left it and saw it for what it was when you looked back.
** Chapter 7 “Conversation with Madmen?” (p. 58)

* That is the most stupid thing yet. I tell you that I could despair of human intelligence when I see what can exist in men’s minds.
** Chapter 15 “The Odds That Vanished” (p. 136)

==== ''[[w:The Stars, Like Dust|The Stars, Like Dust]]'' (1951) ====
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the June 1972 Fawcett Crest mass market paperback edition (Catalogue number Q2780) &lt;/small&gt;

* ''The stars, like dust, encircle me&lt;br&gt;In living mists of light;&lt;br&gt;And all of space I seem to see&lt;br&gt;In one vast burst of sight.''
** Chapter 3 “Chance and the Wrist Watch” (p. 30)

* Nonsense. You are a military man and should know better. If there is one science into which man has probed continuously and successfully, it is that of military technology. No potential weapon would remain unrealized for ten thousand years.
** Chapter 4 “Free?” (p. 33)

* “That’s an amusing thought, if you’ll consider it.”&lt;br&gt;“Do you find everything amusing?”&lt;br&gt;“Why not? As an attitude toward life, it’s an amusing one. It’s the only adjective that will fit. Observe the universe, young man. If you can’t force amusement out of it, you might as well cut your throat, since there’s damn little good in it.”
** Chapter 6 “That Wears a Crown” (p. 51)

* The Autarch maintained his indifferent calm, but a certain lack of certainty was gathering, and he did not like to experience a lack of certainty. He liked nothing which made him aware of limitations. An Autarch should have no limitations, and on Lingane he had none that natural law did not impose.
** Chapter 12 “The Autarch Comes” (p. 104)

* Gillbret said, “Statistics show that one out of three stars has a planetary system.”&lt;br&gt;Biron nodded. It was a well-worn statistic. Every child was taught that in elementary Galactography.
** Chapter 17 “And Hares!” (p. 142)

* I see your vile implication. My only explanation for it is that you are criminally insane.
** Chapter 18 “Out of the Jaws of Defeat!” (p. 156)

* “At least try to see my motives. Granted that I was foolish—criminally foolish—can’t you understand? Can’t you try not to hate me?”&lt;br&gt;She said softly, “I have tried not to love you and, as you see, I have failed.”
** Chapter 19 “Defeat!” (p. 163)

* Well, it was healthy to miss once in a while. It kept self-confidence balanced at a point safely short of arrogance.
** Chapter 20 “Where?” (p. 166)

==== ''[[w:The Currents of Space|The Currents of Space]]'' (1952) ====
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the Fawcett Crest mass market paperback edition (Catalogue number T1541) &lt;/small&gt;

* How then to enforce peace? Not by reason, certainly, nor by education. If a man could not look at the fact of peace and the fact of war and choose the former in preference to the latter, what additional argument could persuade him? What could be more eloquent as a condemnation of war than war itself? What tremendous feat of dialectic could carry with it a tenth the power of a single gutted ship with its ghastly cargo?
** Chapter 6 “The Ambassador” (p. 61)

* An unpleasant nest of nasty, materialistic and aggressive people, careless of the rights of others, imperfectly democratic at home though quick to see the minor slaveries of others, and greedy without end.
** Chapter 6 “The Ambassador” (p. 62)

* Trantor could win even such a war, but perhaps not without paying a price that would make victory only a pleasanter name for defeat.
** Chapter 6 “The Ambassador” (pp. 62-63)

* First, there must be an end to war and national rivalry and only then could one turn to the internal miseries that, after all, had external conflict as their chief cause.
** Chapter 6 “The Ambassador” (p. 63)

* Truth is a discredited commodity among diplomats.
** Chapter 6 “The Ambassador” (p. 64)

* No one is so modest as not to believe himself a competent amateur sleuth.
** Chapter 11 “The Captain” (p. 114)

* “You make interstellar politics sound a very dirty game.”&lt;br&gt;“It is, but disapproving of dirt doesn’t remove it.”
** Chapter 14 “The Renegade” (p. 141)

* “Then why did you run? A man who runs needs no other accusation.”&lt;br&gt;“Is that so? Really?” cried Steen. “Well, I would run out of a burning building even if I had not set the fire myself.”
** Chapter 16 “The Accused” (p. 163)

* Junz found revulsion growing strong within him. A planet full of people meant nothing against the dictates of [[economic]] [[necessity]]!
** Chapter 18 “The Victors” (p. 184)

* Economics is on the side of humanity now.
** Chapter 18 “The Victors” (p. 185)

=== [[w:Foundation series|The ''Foundation'' series]] (1951–1993) ===
:&lt;small&gt;The earliest eight ''Foundation'' short stories were published between May 1942 and January 1950, but these began to be reworked into the novels of the overall series in 1951.&lt;/small&gt;
==== ''[[w:Foundation (novel)|Foundation]]'' (1951) ====
[[File:Nuclear_artillery_test_Grable_Event_-_Part_of_Operation_Upshot-Knothole.jpg |thumb|right|[[Violence]] … is the last refuge of the incompetent.]]
:&lt;small&gt; Four of the stories in this work were originally published with different titles in ''Astounding Magazine'' between 1942 and 1944, and the fifth was added when they first appeared in book form in 1951. &lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Brandenburgertorlaser.jpg|thumb|right|An atom-blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.]]
[[File:Tribute in Light Sep 2008.jpg|thumb|right|It's a poor blaster that ''doesn't'' point both ways.]]

* Q. You do not consider your statement a disloyal one? &lt;br /&gt; A. No, sir. Scientific [[truth]] is beyond [[loyalty]] and disloyalty. &lt;br /&gt; Q. You are sure that your statement represents scientific truth? &lt;br /&gt; A. I am.
** Part I, The Psychohistorians, section 6

* The fall of Empire, gentlemen, is a massive thing, however, and not easily fought. It is dictated by a rising [[bureaucracy]], a receding initiative, a freezing of caste, a damming of [[curiosity]] — a hundred other factors. It has been going on, as I have said, for centuries, and it is too majestic and massive a movement to stop.
** Part I, The Psychohistorians, section 6

* “That insufferable, dull-witted donkey! That—” &lt;br /&gt; Hardin broke in: “Not at all. '''He’s merely the product of his [[environment]]. He doesn’t understand much except that ‘I got a gun and you ain’t.’ '''”
** Part II, The Encyclopedists, section 2 (originally published as “Foundation” in ''Astounding'' (May 1942)

* &quot;It seems an uncommonly woundabout and hopelessly wigmawolish method of getting anywheahs.&quot;
** Part II, The Encyclopedists, section 4

* “Such unsubtle escapism! Really, Dr. Fara, such folly smacks of genius. A lesser mind would be incapable of it.&quot;
** Part II, The Encyclopedists, section 5

* “[[Violence]],” came the retort, “is the last refuge of the incompetent.”
** Part II, The Encyclopedists, section 5; This also appears three times in &quot;Bridle and Saddle&quot; which is titled &quot;The Mayors&quot; within ''Foundation''. It is derived from the famous phrase by [[Samuel Johnson]]: &quot;Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel&quot; and from the words of Lady Anne Bellamy in H. Rider Haggard's ''Dawn'', “I do not believe in violence; it is the last resource of fools.” Asimov is usually quoted simply with &quot;'''Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.'''&quot;

* &quot;First, you refused to admit that there was a menace at all! Then you reposed an absolutely blind faith in the Emperor! Now you've shifted it to Hari Seldon. Throughout you have invariably relied on authority or on the past – never on yourselves. It amounts to a diseased attitude – a conditioned reflex that shunts aside the independence of your minds whenever it is a question of opposing authority. There seems no doubt ever in your minds that the Emperor is more powerful than you are, or Hari Seldon wiser. And that's wrong, don't you see? It isn't just you. It's the whole Galaxy. Pirenne heard Lord Dorwin's idea of scientific research. Lord Dorwin thought the way to be a good archaeologist was to read all the books on the subject – written by men who were dead for centuries. He thought that the way to solve archaeological puzzles was to weigh the opposing authorities. And Pirenne listened and made no objections. Don't you see that there's something wrong with that? And you men and half of Terminus as well are just as bad. We sit here,considering the Encyclopedia the all-in-all. We consider the greatest end of science is the classification of past data. It is important, but is there no further work to be done? We're receding and forgetting, don't you see? Here in the Periphery they've lost nuclear power. In Gamma Andromeda, a power plant has undergone meltdown because of poor repairs, and the Chancellor of the Empire complains that nuclear technicians are scarce. And the solution? To train new ones? Never! Instead they're to restrict nuclear power. Don't you see? It's Galaxy wide. It's a worship of the past. It's a deterioration – a stagnation!&quot;
** Part II, The Encyclopedists, section 5

* Well, then, arrest him. You can accuse him of something or other afterward.
** Part III, The Mayors, section 1; originally published as “Bridle and Saddle” in ''Astounding'' (June 1942)

* “That was the time to begin all-out preparations for [[war]].” &lt;br /&gt; “On the contrary. That was the time to begin all-out prevention of war.”
** Part III, The Mayors, section 1

* '''It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.'''
** Part III, The Mayors, section 2

* Courtiers don't take wagers against the king's skill. There is the deadly danger of winning.
** Part III, The Mayors, section 3

* He believes in that mummery a good deal less than I do, and I don't believe in it at all.
** Part III, The Mayors, section 3

* For it is the chief characteristic of the [[religion]] of [[science]], that it [[works]], and that such curses as that of Aporat's are really deadly.
** Part III, The Mayors, section 7

* A [[fire]] eater must eat fire even if he has to kindle it himself.
** Part III, The Mayors, section 9

* '''Never let your [[sense]] of [[morals]] prevent you from doing what is [[right]].'''
** Part IV, The Traders, section 1; originally published as “The Wedge” in ''Astounding'' (October 1944)

* “Ponyets! They sent you?” &lt;br /&gt; “Pure chance,” said Ponyets, bitterly, “or the work of my own personal malevolent demon.”
** Part IV, The Traders, section 3

* There's something about a pious man such as he. He will cheerfully cut your throat if it suits him, but he will hesitate to endanger the welfare of your immaterial and problematical [[soul]].
** Part IV, The Traders, section 3

* The whole business is the crudest sort of stratagem, since we have no way of foreseeing it to the end. It is a mere paying out of rope on the chance that somewhere along the length of it will be a noose.
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 2; originally published as “The Big and the Little” in ''Astounding'' (August 1944)

* He is energetic only in evading [[responsibility]].
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 2

* '''To succeed, planning alone is insufficient. One must improvise as well.'''
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 3

* Korell is that frequent phenomenon in [[history]]: the republic whose ruler has every attribute of the absolute monarch but the name. It therefore enjoyed the usual despotism unrestrained even by those two moderating influences in the legitimate monarchies: regal “honor” and court etiquette.
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 4

* Now ''any'' dogma, based primarily on [[faith]] and emotionalism, is a dangerous weapon to use on others, since it is almost impossible to guarantee that the weapon will never be turned on the user.
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 13

* An atom blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 13

* '''It's a poor atom blaster that won't point both ways.'''
** Part V, The Merchant Princes, section 18

==== ''[[w:Foundation and Empire|Foundation and Empire]]'' (1952) ====
[[File:RocketSunIcon.svg|thumb|right|Inertia! Our ruling class knows one [[law]]; no [[change]]. Despotism! They know one [[rule]]; [[force]]. Maldistribution! They know one [[desire]]; to hold what is theirs.]]

* He is a dreamer of ancient times, or rather, of the [[myths]] of what ancient times used to be. Such men are harmless in themselves, but their queer lack of realism makes them [[fools]] for others.
** Chapter 4 “The Emperor; in part I, “The General” originally published as “Dead Hand” in Astounding (April 1945)

* You are a valuable subject, Brodrig. You always suspect far more than is necessary, and I have but to take half your suggested precautions to be utterly safe.
** Chapter 4 “The Emperor”

* Inertia! Our ruling class knows one [[law]]; no [[change]]. Despotism! They know one [[rule]]; [[force]]. Maldistribution! They know one [[desire]]; to hold what is theirs.
** Chapter 11 “Bride and Groom”; in part II, “The Mule” originally published under the same title in Astounding (November-December 1945)

* To him, a stilted geometric love of arrangement was “[[system]],” an indefatigable and feverish interest in the pettiest facets of day-to-day [[bureaucracy]] was “industry,” indecision when right was “caution,” and blind stubbornness when wrong, “determination.”
** Chapter 12 “Captain and Mayor”

* '''It is the invariable lesson to [[humanity]] that distance in [[time]], and in [[space]] as well, lends focus.''' It is not recorded, incidentally, that the lesson has ever been permanently learned.
** Chapter 13 “Lieutenant and Clown”

* “Were I to use the [[wits]] the good Spirits gave me,” he said, “then I would say this lady can not exist — for what sane man would hold a [[dream]] to be [[reality]]. Yet rather would I not be sane and lend belief to charmed, enchanted eyes.”
** Chapter 13 “Lieutenant and Clown”

* “'''When the twenty-seven independent Trading Worlds''', united only by their distrust of mother planet of the Foundation, '''concert an assembly among themselves, and each is big with a pride grown of its smallness, hardened by its own insularity and embittered by eternal danger — there are preliminary negotiations to be overcome of a pettiness sufficiently staggering to heart-sicken the most persevering'''.”
** Chapter 16 “Conference”

* It is well-known that the friend of a conqueror is but the last victim.
** Chapter 22 “Death on Neotrantor”

==== ''[[w:Second Foundation|Second Foundation]]'' (1953) ====
* '''[[Secrecy]] as deep as this is past possibility without nonexistence as well.'''
** Chapter 1 “Two Men and the Mule”; in part I, “Search by the Mule” originally published as “Now You See It—” in Astounding (January 1948)

* He never created a finished product. Finished products are for decadent minds.
** Chapter 6 &quot;One Man, the Mule - And Another&quot;

* Your emotions are, of course, only the children of your background and are not to be condemned - merely changed.
** Chapter 6 &quot;One Man, the Mule - And Another&quot;, the First Speaker to the Mule

* Every [[human]] being lived behind an impenetrable wall of choking mist within which no other but he existed. Occasionally there were the dim signals from deep within the cavern in which another man was located — so that each might grope toward the other. Yet because they did not know one another, and could not understand one another, and dared not trust one another, and felt from infancy the terrors and insecurity of that ultimate isolation — there was the hunted fear of man for man, the savage rapacity of man toward man.
** Chapter 8 “Seldon’s Plan”; in part II, “Search by the Foundation” originally published as “—And Now You Don’t” in Astounding (November and December 1949 and January 1950)

* The most hopelessly stupid man is he who is not aware that he is wise.
** Chapter 8 “Seldon’s Plan”

* One should cultivate an innocence, an awareness of self, and an unselfconsciousness of self which leaves one nothing to hide.
** Chapter 8 &quot;Seldon's Plan&quot;

* The house was somehow very lonely at night and Dr. Darell found that the fate of the Galaxy made remarkably little difference while his daughter's mad little life was in danger.
** Chapter 11 “Stowaway”

* Remarkable what a fragile flower romance is. A gun with a nervous operator behind it can spoil the whole thing.
** Chapter 11 “Stowaway”

* No matter how the conomy and sociology of the neighbouring sectors of the Galaxy changes, there was always an elite; and it is always the characteristic of an elite that it possesses leisure as the great reward of its elite-hood.
** Chapter 12 &quot;Lord&quot;

* The spell of [[power]] never quite releases its hold.
** Chapter 12 “Lord”

* To us, all life is a series of accidents to be met with improvisations. To them, all life is purposive and should be met with precalculation.
** Chapter 16 &quot;Beginning of War&quot;

==== ''[[w:Foundation’s Edge|Foundation’s Edge]]'' (1982) ====
[[File:Spaceship and Sun emblem.svg|thumb|right|Once you get it into your head that somebody is controlling events, you can interpret everything in that [[light]] and find no reasonable [[certainty]] anywhere.]]
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the mass market edition published by Del Rey (17th printing, March 1989) &lt;/small&gt;

* At odd and unpredictable times, we cling in fright to the [[past]].
** Chapter 1 “Councilman” section 1, p. 4

* It seems to me, Golan, that the advance of civilization is nothing but an exercise in the limiting of privacy.
** Chapter 6 “Earth” section 1, p. 100

* If there is a misuse of [[power]], it is on her part. '''My [[crime]] is that I have never labored to make myself popular — I admit that much — and I have paid too little attention to [[fools]] who are old enough to be senile but young enough to have [[power]].'''
** Chapter 8 “Farmwoman” section 5, p. 154

* Pelorat sighed. “I will never understand people.” &lt;br /&gt; “There’s nothing to it. All you have to do is take a close look at yourself and you will understand everyone else. We’re in no way different ourselves... '''You show me someone who can’t understand people and I’ll show you someone who has built up a false image of himself.'''”
** Chapter 11 “Sayshell” section 3, p. 205

* '''Once you get it into your head that somebody is controlling events, you can interpret everything in that [[light]] and find no reasonable [[certainty]] anywhere.'''
** Chapter 12 “Agent” section 4, p. 226

* “Is not all this an extraordinary concatenation of [[coincidence]]?” &lt;br /&gt; Pelorat said, “If you list it like that—” &lt;br /&gt; “List it any way you please,” said Trevize. “I don’t believe in extraordinary concatenations of coincidence.”
** Chapter 14 “Forward!” section 1, p. 281

* It's one thing to have guts; it's another to be [[crazy]].
** Chapter 15 “Gaia-S” section 2, p. 302

* “'''[[Stories]] grow by accretion. Tales accumulate — like dust.''' The longer the [[time]] lapse, the dustier the history — until it degenerates into fables.” &lt;br /&gt; Pelorat said, “We historians are familiar with the process, Dom. There is a certain preference for the fable. The falsely dramatic drives out the truly dull.”
** Chapter 17 “Gaia” section 5, p. 361

* Societies create their own history and tend to wipe out lowly beginnings, either by forgetting them or inventing totally fictitious heroic rescues.
** Chapter 17 “Gaia” section 5, p. 363

* It was easy to cover up ignorance by the mystical word “intuition.”
** Chapter 18 “Collision” section 4, p. 377

* '''It is better to go to defeat with free will than to live in a meaningless security as a cog in a machine.'''
** Chapter 19 “Decision” section 7, p. 404

* We abandoned the [[appearance]] of [[power]] to preserve the essence of it.
** Chapter 20 “Conclusion” section 1, p. 408

* If you were to insist I was a robot, you might not consider me capable of [[love]] in some [[mystic]] [[human]] sense, but you would not be able to distinguish my reactions from that which you would call love — so what difference would it make?
** Chapter 20 “Conclusion” section 4, p. 420

==== ''[[w:Foundation and Earth|Foundation and Earth]]'' (1986) ====

* Old memories - really old - are almost all in the mountain roots where it takes time to dig them out.
** Part 1 &quot;Gaia&quot;, Chapter 1 &quot;The Search Begins&quot; section 4, p. 19

* Now the plan was threatend by something more serious than the Mule had ever been. It was to be diverted from a renewal of Empire to something utterly different from anything in history - Galaxia. And he himself had agreed to that. But why? Was there a flaw in the plan? a basic flaw? For one flashing moment, it seemed to Trevize that this flaw did indeed exist and that he knew what it was, that he had known what it was when he made his decision - but the knowledge...if that were what it was...vanished as fast as it came, and left him with nothing.
** Part 2 &quot;Comporellon&quot;, Chapter 3 &quot;At the Entry Station&quot; section 3, p. 59

* The robot has wanted Fallom all along, Janov.
** Part 7 &quot;Earth&quot; Chapter 21 &quot;The Search Ends&quot; section 2, p. 443

==== ''[[w:Prelude to Foundation|Prelude to Foundation]]'' (1988) ====
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the mass market edition published by Bantam Spectra in September 2004, {{ISBN|0-553-27839-8}}, (29th printing) &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; Italics and ellipsis as in the book &lt;/small&gt;

* Yet even mathematicians must be young to begin with.
** Chapter 3 (p. 10)

* All history shows that we do not learn from the lessons of the past.
** Chapter 3 (p. 17)

* Mathematicians deal with large numbers sometimes, but never in their income.
** Chapter 5 (p. 25)

* Walking is still the best form of short-distance transportation. It’s the most convenient, the cheapest, and the most healthful, Countless years of technological advance have not changed that.
** Chapter 9 (p. 43)

* We might not be able to give out the news for security reasons—that’s the excuse they always advance for hiding bad news—but ''I'' would know.
** Chapter 9 (p. 45)

* “But it’s been quiet under Cleon. And we’ve had fifty years of peace.”&lt;br&gt;“Yes, but soldiers who are well-paid would resent having that pay reduced just because there is peace. Admirals resist mothballing ships and having themselves reduced in rank simply because there is less for them to do. So the credits still go—unproductively—to the armed forces and vital areas of the social good are allowed to deteriorate. That’s what I call decay. Don’t you?”
** Chapter 14 (p. 71)

* “It is absolutely forbidden for the Imperial government to exercise any security control over the University or its members. There is complete freedom. Anything can be discussed here, anything can be said here.”&lt;br&gt;“What about violent crime?”&lt;br&gt;“Then the University authorities themselves handle it, with reason and care—and there are virtually no crimes of violence. The students and faculty appreciate their freedom and understand its terms. Too much rowdiness, the beginning of riot and bloodshed, and the government may feel it has the right to break the unwritten agreement and send in the troops. No one wants that, not even the government, so a delicate balance is maintained.”
** Chapter 16 (pp. 78-79)

* “My field of specialization is the mathematical analysis of social structure.”&lt;br&gt;“Sounds horrible.”
** Chapter 18 (p. 87)

* “As for status, that’s the sort of push and pull I’d just as soon avoid. I’ve seen many people with status, but I’m still looking for a happy one. Status won’t sit still under you; you have to continually fight to keep from sinking.
** Chapter 18 (p. 90)

* It’s a dull world, full of farms and with lots of cattle, both four-legged and two-legged.
** Chapter 18 (p. 90)

* Apparently, mathematics and the martial arts are not necessarily mutually exclusive.
** Chapter 19 (p. 95)

* There is too much history and there is too little of it that is told.
** Chapter 21 (p. 109)

* I have always dealt with economic forces, rather than philosophic forces, but you can’t split history into neat little nonoverlapping divisions. For instance, religions tend to accumulate wealth when successful and that eventually tends to distort the economic development of a society.
** Chapter 41 (p. 215)

* But it seemed so likely to him that on every world the earliest histories were medleys of self-serving heroisms and minidramas that were meant as morality plays and were not to be taken literally. It was surely true of Helicon, yet you would find scarcely a Heliconian who would not swear by all the tales told and insist it was all true history.
** Chapter 45 (p. 237)

* I don’t want to believe it just because I ''want'' to believe it.
** Chapter 48 (p. 251)

* The cure for advanced gullibility is to go to sleep and consider matters again the next day.
** Chapter 48 (p. 253)

* Does said, “You’re not a…a believer?”&lt;br&gt;“I’m a scholar,” said Mycelium with obvious pride.
** Chapter 52 (p. 272)

* Why, he wondered, did so many people spend their lives not trying to find answers to questions—not even thinking of questions to begin with? Was there anything more exciting in life than seeking answers?
** Chapter 55 (p. 281)

* Asceticism among a ruling class—except for public show—is very rare.
** Chapter 57 (p. 295)

* At the slightest stress, human beings seemed to divide themselves into antagonistic groups.
** Chapter 72 (p. 378)

* You can always put something noble in a sneering fashion if you try.
** Chapter 75 (p. 391)

* “It strikes me that no one could possibly want to be Emperor.”&lt;br&gt;“No sane person would, I agree, but the ‘Imperial wish,’ as it is frequently called, is like a disease that, when caught, drives out sanity. And the closer you get to high office, the more likely you are to catch the disease.”
** Chapter 77 (p. 404)

* It is not important what can or cannot be done. What is important is what people will or will not believe can be done.
** Chapter 86 (p. 447)

* You’re naïve Hari. Or not a historian, which is the same thing.
** Chapter 88 (p. 457)

* If all human beings understood history, they might cease making the same stupid mistakes over and over.
** Chapter 88 (p. 457)

* There is social and psychological inertia, as well as physical inertia.
** Chapter 88 (p. 457)

==== ''[[w:Forward the Foundation|Forward the Foundation]]'' (1993) ====

* Seldon found himself raging at the passage of time.
** Part 1 &quot;Eto Demerzel&quot;, Chapter 5

* For ten years the Galactic Empire had been without an Emperor, but there was no indication of that fact in the way the Imperial Palace grounds were operated. Millennia of custom made the absence of an Emperor meaningless.
** Part 3 &quot;Dors Venabili&quot;, Chapter 12

* Riots! What do I care about riots now? - What do I care about anything now?
** Part 3 &quot;Dors Venabili&quot;, Chapter 26, [[w:Hari Seldon|Hari Seldon]] after the death of [[w:Dors Venabili|Dors Venabili]]

* This - this - was my life's work. My past - humanity's future. Foundation. So beatiful. So alive. And nothing can...Dors!
** Part 5 &quot;Epilogue&quot;, [[w:Hari Seldon|Hari Seldon]]'s last words

=== ''[[w:The End of Eternity|The End of Eternity]]'' (1955) ===
* Confidence is rewarded, apparently. There was a homewhen proverb that went, &quot;Grip the nettle firmly and it will become a stick with which to beat your enemy.&quot;

=== &quot;[[w:The Last Question|The Last Question]]&quot; (1956) ===
[[File:Emanation.png|thumb|right|Step by step, it [[must]] be done. &lt;br /&gt; And AC said, “LET THERE BE [[Light|LIGHT]]!” &lt;br /&gt; And there was light —]]
:&lt;small&gt; &quot;[[w:The Last Question|The Last Question]]&quot;, first published in ''Science Fiction Quarterly'' (November 1956) · [https://archive.org/stream/Science_Fiction_Quarterly_New_Series_v04n05_1956-11_slpn#page/n5/mode/2up Full text online at the Internet Archive]&lt;/small&gt;

* '''How can the net amount of [[entropy]] of the [[universe]] be massively decreased?''' &lt;br /&gt;

*''' &quot;The Last Question&quot; is my personal favorite''', the one story I made sure would not be omitted from this collection. Why is it my favorite? For one thing I got the [[idea]] all at once and didn't have to fiddle with it; and I wrote it in white-heat and scarcely had to change a word. This sort of thing endears any story to any writer. &lt;br /&gt; Then, too, it has had the strangest effect on my readers. Frequently someone writes to ask me if I can give them the name of a story, which they think I may have written, and tell them where to find it. '''They don't remember the title but when they describe the story it is invariably &quot;The Last Question&quot;.''' This has reached the point where I recently received a long-distance phone call from a desperate man who began, &quot;Dr. Asimov, there's a story I think you wrote, whose title I can't remember—&quot; at which point I interrupted to tell him it was &quot;The Last Question&quot; and when I described the plot it proved to be indeed the story he was after. I left him convinced I could read minds at a distance of a thousand miles. &lt;br /&gt;'''No other story I have written has anything like this effect on my readers — producing at once an unshakeable memory of the plot and an unshakeable forgettery of the title and even author. I think it may be that the story fills them so frighteningly full, that they can retain none of the side-issues.'''
** &quot;Introduction&quot; to ''The Best of Isaac Asimov'' (1973)&lt;!-- , p. ix --&gt;

=== ''[[w:The Gods Themselves|The Gods Themselves]]'' (1972) ===
[[File:Catástrofe.jpg|thumb|right|I suppose I can argue myself into believing that I have no great cause to [[love]] [[humanity]]. However, only a few people have hurt me, and if I hurt everyone in return that is unconscionable usury.]]

* '''To [[Mankind]] &lt;br /&gt; And the [[hope]] that the [[war]] against [[folly]] may someday be won, after all.'''
** Dedication, p. 5; this refers to the quotation of [[Friedrich Schiller]] from which Asimov derived the title of this novel: &quot;'''Against [[stupidity]] the [[gods]] themselves contend in [[vain]].'''&quot;

* &quot;Don't finish, Pete. I've heard it all before. All I have to do is decipher the thinking of a non-human [[intelligence]].&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;A better-than-human intelligence. '''Those creatures from the para-Universe are trying to make themselves [[understood]].'''&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;That may be,&quot; sighed Bronowski, &quot;but they're trying to do it through my intelligence, which is better than human I sometimes think, but not much. '''Sometimes, in the dark of the night, I lie awake and wonder if different intelligences can communicate at all; or, if I've had a particularly bad day, whether the phrase 'different intelligences' has meaning at all.&quot;'''&lt;br /&gt;&quot;It does,&quot; said Lamont savagely, his hands clearly bailing into fists within his lab coat pockets. &quot;It means Hallam and me. It means that fool-hero, Dr. Frederick Hallam and me. We're different intelligences because when I talk to him he doesn't understand. His idiot face gets redder and his eyes bulge and his ears block. I'd say his [[mind]] stops functioning, but lack the proof of any other state from which it might stop.&quot;
** Section 1 “Against stupidity...”, Chapter 6, p. 12

* “It is a [[mistake]],” he said, “to suppose that the public wants the [[environment]] protected or their lives saved and that they will be [[grateful]] to any [[idealist]] who will [[fight]] for such ends. What the public wants is their own individual [[comfort]]. We know that well enough from our [[experience]] in the environmental crisis of the twentieth century.”
** Section 1, Chapter 7, p. 56; the book is set in the year 2100.

* He sat in his chair, fingers aimlessly drumming, drumming. Somewhere in the Sun, protons were clinging together with just a trifling additional avidity and with each moment that avidity grew and at some moment the delicate balance would break down . . . &quot;And no one on Earth will live to know I was right,&quot; cried out Lamont, and blinked and blinked to keep back the tears.
** Section 1 &quot;Against stupidity...&quot;, Chapter 10 (final line of Section 1)

* Tritt listened placidly, clearly understanding nothing, but content to be listening; while Odeen, transmitting nothing, was as clearly content to be lecturing.
** Section 2 “...the gods themselves...”, Chapter 1b, p. 82

* I don't like anything that's ''got'' to be. I want to know why.
** Section 2, Chapter 2a, p. 93

* I know nothing of that directly; I only know what I have been told by other young ones who couldn't have known directly either. I want to find out the truth about them and the wanting has grown until there is more of [[curiosity]] in me than [[fear]].
** Section 2, Chapter 2b, p. 104

* '''I fear my [[ignorance]].'''
** Section 3 “...contend in vain?”, Chapter 3 (p. 187)

* The easiest way to solve a problem is to deny it exists.
** Section 3, Chapter 10, p. 236

* You ''know'' that prudery is only the other side of prurience. The words are even on the same page in the dictionary.
** Section 3, Chapter 12, p. 244

* '''I've lived most of my [[life]] already and I suppose I can argue myself into believing that I have no great cause to love [[humanity]]. However, only a few people have hurt me, and if I hurt everyone in return that is unconscionable usury.'''
** Section 3, Chapter 12, p. 250

* If an interaction is too weak to be detectable or to exert influence in any way, then by any operational definition, it doesn't exist.
** Section 3, Chapter 12, p. 257

* '''There are no [[happy]] [[endings]] in [[history]], only crisis points that pass.'''
** Section 3, Chapter 19, p. 287

=== An Interview with Isaac Asimov (1979) ===
:&lt;small&gt;[http://americanindian.net/asimov.html &quot;An Interview with Isaac Asimov&quot;] by Phil Konstantin, Southwest Airlines Magazine, (1979)&lt;/small&gt;

*'''Asimov''': Well, I liked [[Star Wars (film)|Star Wars]]. I thought [[Battlestar Galactica]] was such a close imitation of Star Wars, emphasizing the less attractive portions, that I was a little impatient with it.
*'''Asimov''': [[Battlestar Galactica]] for instance, started off with twenty to thirty minutes of space battles which looked exactly like air battles in World War I. You could swear that the space ships were surrounded by air the way the maneuvered. One felt it was unworthy.
:'''SWA Magazine''': The Vipers in Battlestar Galactica look like jets. Is this a realistic design for the future?
:'''Asimov''': It is as if people in the 1880s were writing fantasy stories about airplanes of the future and they had the pilots lean back at the wheel and yell &quot;whoa&quot; and the airplane came to a halt in mid-air.

*'''SWA Magazine''': Talking about spacecraft, what do you think about the shuttle program?
:'''Asimov''': Well, I hope it does get off the ground. And I hope they expand it, because the shuttle program is the gateway to everything else. By means of the shuttle, we will be able to build space stations and power stations, laboratory facilities and habitations, and everything else in space.
:'''SWA Magazine''': How about orbital space colonies? Do you see these facilities being built or is the government going to cut back on projects like this?
:'''Asimov''': Well, now you've put your finger right on it. In order to have all of these wonderful things in space, we don't have to wait for technology - we've got the technology, and we don't have to wait for the know-how - we've got that too. All we need is the political go-ahead and the economic willingness to spend the money that is necessary. It is a little frustrating to think that if people concentrate on how much it is going to cost they will realize the great amount of profit they will get for their investment. Although they are reluctant to spend a few billions of dollars to get back an infinite quantity of money, the world doesn't mind spending $400 billion every years on arms and armaments, never getting anything back from it except a chance to commit suicide.

=== ''Mother Earth News'' interview (1980) ===
:&lt;small&gt;[http://www.motherearthnews.com/Nature-and-Environment/science-technology-isaac-asimov-zmaz80sozraw &quot;Science, Technology and Space: The Isaac Asimov Interview&quot;] Pat Stone, ''Mother Earth News'' (October 1980)&lt;/small&gt;

*'''Asimov''': I don't know of any science fiction writer who really attempts to be a prophet. Such authors accomplish their tasks not by being correct in their predictions, necessarily, but merely by hammering home—in story after story—the notion that life is going to be different.

* '''Asimov''': Science fiction always bases its future visions on changes in the levels of science and technology. And the reason for that consistency is simply that—in reality—all other changes throughout history have been irrelevant and trivial. For example, what difference did it make to the people of the ancient world that [[Alexander the Great]] conquered the Persian Empire? Obviously, that event made some difference to a lot of individuals. But if you look at humanity in general, you'll see that life went on pretty much as it had before the conquest. &lt;br /&gt; On the other hand, consider the changes that were made in people's daily lives by the development of agriculture or the mariner's compass ... and by the invention of gunpowder or printing. Better yet, look at recent history and ask yourself, &quot;What difference would it have made if [[Hitler]] had won [[World War II]]?&quot; Of course, such a victory would have made a great difference to many people. It would have resulted in much horror, anguish, and pain. I myself would probably not have survived. &lt;br /&gt; But Hitler would have died eventually, and the effects of his victory would gradually have washed out and become insignificant—in terms of real change—when compared to such advances as the actual working out of nuclear power, the advent of television, or the invention of the jet plane.

*'''Plowboy''': You truly feel that all the major changes in history have been caused by science and technology?
:'''Asimov''': Those that have proved permanent—the ones that affected every facet of life and made certain that mankind could never go back again—were always brought about by science and technology. In fact, the same twin &quot;movers&quot; were even behind the other &quot;solely&quot; historical changes. Why, for instance, did Martin Luther succeed, whereas other important rebels against the medieval church—like John Huss—fail? Well, Luther was successful because printing had been developed by the time he advanced his cause. So his good earthy writings were put into pamphlets and spread so far and wide that the church officials couldn't have stopped the Protestant Reformation even if they had burned Luther at the stake.
:'''Plowboy''': Today the world is changing faster than it has at any other time in history. Do you then feel that science—and scientists—are especially important now?
:'''Asimov''': I do think so, and as a result it's my opinion that anyone who can possibly introduce science to the nonscientist should do so. After all, we don't want scientists to become a priesthood. We don't want society's technological thinkers to know something that nobody else knows—to &quot;bring down the law from Mt. Sinai&quot;—because such a situation would lead to public fear of science and scientists. And fear, as you know, can be dangerous.
:'''Plowboy''': But scientific knowledge is becoming so incredibly vast and specialized these days that it's difficult for any individual to keep up with it all.
:'''Asimov''': Well, I don't expect everybody to be a scientist or to understand every new development. After all, there are very few Americans who know enough about football to be a referee or to call the plays ... but many, many people understand the sport well enough to follow the game. It's not important that the average citizen understand science so completely that he or she could actually become involved in research, but it is very important that people be able to &quot;follow the game&quot; well enough to have some intelligent opinions on policy. &lt;br /&gt; Every subject of worldwide importance—each question upon which the life and death of humanity depends—involves science, and people are not going to be able to exercise their democratic right to direct government policy in such areas if they don't understand what the decisions are all about.

*'''Plowboy''': In your opinion, what are mankind's prospects for the near future?
:'''Asimov''': To tell the truth, I don't think the odds are very good that we can solve our immediate problems. I think the chances that civilization will survive more than another 30 years—that it will still be flourishing in 2010—are less than 50 percent.
:'''Plowboy''': What sort of disaster do you foresee?
:'''Asimov''': I imagine that as population continues to increase—and as the available resources decrease—there will be less energy and food, so we'll all enter a stage of scrounging. The average person's only concerns will be where he or she can get the next meal, the next cigarette, the next means of transportation. In such a universal scramble, the Earth will be just plain desolated, because everyone will be striving merely to survive regardless of the cost to the environment. Put it this way: If I have to choose between saving myself and saving a tree, I'm going to choose me. &lt;br /&gt; [[Terrorism]] will also become a way of life in a world marked by severe shortages. Finally, some government will be bound to decide that the only way to get what its people need is to destroy another nation and take its goods ... by pushing the nuclear button. &lt;br /&gt; And this absolute chaos is going to develop—even if nobody wants nuclear war and even if everybody sincerely wants peace and social justice—if the number of mouths to feed continues to grow. Nothing will be able to stand up against the pressure of the whole of humankind simply trying to stay alive!

=== ''The Roving Mind'' (1983) ===
[[File:Rainbow1.svg|thumb|right|I'll [[believe]] anything, no matter how wild and ridiculous, if there is [[evidence]] for it. The wilder and more ridiculous something is, however, the firmer and more solid the evidence will have to be.]]
[[File:Double-alaskan-rainbow.jpg|thumb|right|[[Knowledge]] is indivisible. When people grow [[wise]] in one direction, they are sure to make it easier for themselves to grow wise in other directions as well. ]]
[[File:US Navy 060608-N-6501M-005 The U.S. Military Sealift Command (MSC) Hospital ship USNS Mercy (T-AH 19), anchored off of the coast of Jolo City.jpg|thumb|right|The true [[artist]] is quite [[rational]] as well as [[imaginative]] and [[knows]] what he is [[doing]]; if he does not, his [[art]] suffers. The true scientist is quite imaginative as well as rational, and sometimes leaps to solutions where [[reason]] can follow only slowly; if he does not, his [[science]] suffers.]]

* Don't you believe in flying saucers, they ask me? Don't you believe in telepathy? — in ancient astronauts? — in the Bermuda triangle? — in life after death? &lt;br /&gt; No, I reply. No, no, no, no, and again no. &lt;br /&gt; One person recently, goaded into desperation by the litany of unrelieved negation, burst out &quot;Don't you believe in ''anything''?&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Yes&quot;, I said. &quot;'''I believe in [[evidence]]. I believe in observation, measurement, and reasoning, confirmed by independent observers. I'll believe anything, no matter how wild and ridiculous, if there is evidence for it. The wilder and more ridiculous something is, however, the firmer and more solid the evidence will have to be.'''&quot;
** p. 43

* '''[[Knowledge]] is indivisible. When people grow [[wise]] in one direction, they are sure to make it easier for themselves to grow wise in other directions as well. On the other hand, when they split up knowledge, concentrate on their own field, and [[scorn]] and ignore other fields, they grow less wise — even in their own field.'''
** Ch. 25

* '''How often people speak of [[art]] and [[science]] as though they were two entirely different things, with no interconnection.''' An artist is emotional, they think, and uses only his intuition; he sees all at once and has no need of [[reason]]. A scientist is cold, they think, and uses only his reason; he argues carefully step by step, and needs no [[imagination]]. That is all [[wrong]]. '''The true artist is quite rational as well as imaginative and knows what he is doing; if he does not, his art suffers. The true scientist is quite imaginative as well as rational, and sometimes leaps to solutions where reason can follow only slowly; if he does not, his science suffers.'''
** Ch. 25

=== ''[[w:Autobiographies of Isaac Asimov|I. Asimov: A Memoir]]'' (1994) ===
:&lt;small&gt; All page numbers from the mass market edition published by Bantam Books in February 1995, {{ISBN|0-553-56997-X}}, (6th printing) &lt;/small&gt;
:&lt;small&gt; Italics as in the book. Bold face added for emphasis. &lt;/small&gt;

* Why is it, I wonder, that anyone who displays superior athletic ability is an object of admiration to his classmates, while one who displays superior mental ability is an object of hatred? Is there some hidden understanding that it is brains, not muscles, that define the human being and that children who are not good at athletics are simply not good, while those who are not smart feel themselves to be subhuman? I don’t know.
** Chapter 1, “Infant Prodigy?” (p. 4)

* By the time I was reading the Bible, however, science fiction and science books had taught me their version of the universe and I was not ready to accept the creation tale of Genesis or the various miracles described throughout the book. My experience with the Greek myths (and, later, the grimmer Norse myths) made it quite obvious to me that I was reading Hebrew myths.
** Chapter 5, “Religion” (p. 13)

* '''I have never, in all my life, not for one moment, been tempted toward religion of any kind. The fact is that I feel no spiritual void. I have my philosophy of life, which does not include any aspect of the supernatural and which I find totally satisfying. I am, in short, a rationalist and believe only that which reason tells me is so.'''
** Chapter 5, “Religion” (p. 13)

* The whole world seems to live under the banner: “[[Freedom]] is wonderful—but only for me.”
** Chapter 7, “Anti-Semitism” (p. 22)

* '''It is a mistake to think that because a group has suffered extreme persecution that is a sign that they are virtuous and innocent.''' They might be, of course, but the persecution process is no proof of that. The persecution merely shows that the persecuted group is weak. Had they been strong, then, for all we know, they might have been the persecutors.
** Chapter 7, “Anti-Semitism” (p. 22)

* '''I received the fundamentals of my education in school, but that was not enough. My ''real'' education, the superstructure, the details, the true architecture, I got out of the public library.''' For an impoverished child whose family could not afford to buy books, the library was the open door to wonder and achievement, and I can never be sufficiently grateful that I had the wit to charge through that door and make the most of it.&lt;br&gt;Now, when I read constantly about the way in which library funds are being cut and cut, I can only think that the door is closing and that American society has found one more way to destroy itself.
** Chapter 8, “Library” (p. 29)

* I have always estimated that any but the most trivial connection with Hollywood, however profitable it might ''seem'' at the moment, would end in disaster, and I have stayed away from the place. I have never regretted it either.
** Chapter 9, “Bookworm” (p. 31)

* When I was young, all youngsters wore caps.… Now they are gone, all gone. The story I’ve heard was that caps were always worn by the bad guys in the early gangster movies, and the American public, never notable for thinking for themselves, therefore rejected them.
** Chapter 11, “Growing Up” (pp. 35-36; ellipsis represents elision of a list of examples)

* However trashy pulp fiction might be, it had to be ''read.'' Youngsters avid for the corny, lightning-jagged, cliché-ridden, clumsy stories had to read words and sentences to satisfy their craving. It trained everyone who read it in literacy, and a small percentage of them may that have passed on to better things.&lt;br&gt;Now consider what has happened since.…&lt;br&gt;In general, the trend over the last half century or so has been away from the word to the picture. The comic magazines increased the level of looking, decreased the level of reading. The television set is carried this to an extreme.
** Chapter 14, “Science Fiction” (p. 46; ellipsis represents elision of a list of examples)

* What I do now is think of a problem ''and a resolution to that problem.'' I then begin the story, making it up as I go along, having all the excitement of finding out what will happen to the characters and how they will get out of their scrapes, but working steadily toward the known resolution, so that I don’t get lost en route.&lt;br&gt;When I asked for advice for beginners, I always stress that. Know your ending, I say, or the river of your story may finally sink into the desert sands and never reach the sea.
** Chapter 15, “Beginning to Write” (p. 49)

* [[w:Ronald Reagan|Ronald Reagan]] I have always viewed as a brainless fellow who echoes the opinions of anyone who gets close to him.
** Chapter 24, “Robert Anson Heinlein” (p. 77)

* The novels I have been writing lately are the kind I wrote in the 1950s. (I have been criticized for this by some critics, but the day I pay attention to critics is the day the sky will fall.)
** Chapter 24, “Robert Anson Heinlein” (p. 77)

* Nor did I learn about [[Human sexual activity|sex]] from any reasoned source of instruction. I learned about it from the distorted and imperfect knowledge of other boys. This is the usual fate enforced upon youngsters by a society that is too prim and too hypocritical to have sex taught like any other branch of knowledge.&lt;br&gt;Considering how important sex is, how great a source of joy, how enormous a source of misery and disease, how is permeates the workings of courtship and marriage, isn’t it strange that we go to great lengths to teach our children to play football and make no effort whatever to teach them to play sex?
** Chapter 31, “Women” (p. 93)

* As one gets older and more rickety, and as medical technology advances, doctors love to play with their toys, using you as their victim.
** Chapter 43, “Claustrophilia” (p. 131)

* [[w:Arthur C. Clarke|Arthur]] and I share similar views on science fiction, on science, on social questions, and on politics. I have never had occasion to disagree with him on any of these things, which is a credit to his clear-thinking intelligence.
** Chapter 48, “Arthur Charles Clarke” (pp. 142-143)

* Lecturing helps only the students. Research, on the other hand, means government grants, and a portion of the grants is invariably marked for “overhead,” which goes to the school. What it amounts to is that the school chooses research over lecturing every time—money for itself over education for its students.
** Chapter 54, “Boston University School of Medicine” (p. 164)

* '''The greatest single problem facing humanity today is the [[Overpopulation|multiplicity of people]].''' No environmental problem can possibly be solved till the population is stabilized and brought under control. Under these circumstances, it would seem that any young couple who were indifferent to children and showed no disposition to add to Earth’s burden ought to be encouraged and made much of.&lt;br&gt;The truth, however, is quite the contrary. The world would not let us be childless. People who met us invariably asked if we had children, and when we said we didn’t, they would look at us with disapproval or with sorrow.
** Chapter 58, “Children” (p. 174)

* The rest of the faculty avoided me for fear that too close an association with the school leper might get them into trouble too. One of them, however, approached me cautiously once and, making sure we were not under observation, he told me that he was proud of me end of my bravery and continuing to fight for academic freedom.&lt;br&gt;I shrugged. “There’s no bravery about it. I ''have'' academic freedom and I can give it to you in two words.”&lt;br&gt;“What’s that?” he asked.&lt;br&gt;“Outside income,” I said.&lt;br&gt;It’s true. The average faculty member is under an enormous disadvantage in a fight with the administration. He need not even be fired, he need merely be harassed, and he ''must'' start looking for a new position. They are not easy to find and generally, if he waits too long, he might find he ''is'' fired and, without a salary, he can be in deep financial trouble.
** Chapter 65, “Fired” (p. 198)

* '''Ten thousand years ago, human beings devised the techniques of agriculture and herding and slowly begin the process of destroying the environment by overgrazing and by overfarming.'''&lt;br&gt;Still, not all that human beings could do in the wildest excesses of war and rapine could seriously damage the planet until 1945. In that year, the first nuclear bomb was exploded, and the Industrial Revolution, fed by cheap oil, went into high gear. We are now perfectly capable of damaging the planet beyond repair in any reasonable time, and are, in fact, in the process of doing so.
** Chapter 71, “Doomsday” (p. 221)

* In writing a [[science fiction]] novel, you must invent a futuristic social structure which is complex enough to be interesting in itself apart from the story and which is self-consistent. You must also invent a plot that works only within that social structure. The plot must develop without unduly obscuring the description of the social structure, and the social structure must be described without unduly slowing the plot.&lt;br&gt;Making a science fiction novel fulfill this double purpose is difficult even for an experienced and talented old hand such as myself. Every other kind of writing is ''easier'' than science fiction.
** Chapter 85, “Mystery Novels” (p. 265)

* '''I just work on the principle that of all the virtues gratitude (next to honesty) is the greatest, and that has helped me on numerous occasions in my life.'''
** Chapter 86, “Lawrence P. Ashmead” (pp. 266-267)

* [[Happiness]] is doing it rotten your own way.
** Chapter 90, “Indexes” (p. 277)

* Of course, some people did not like my headnotes. They took them to represent an unhealthy, hypertrophied ego on my part. It’s not true, of course. I just like myself, that’s all, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. One critic wrote something I’m willing to agree with. He said, “The man is very immodest, but he has much to be immodest about.”
** Chapter 97, “Headnotes” (p. 298)

* I resented much modern poetry, because I couldn’t understand it (and, worse yet, there was nothing about it that gave me the urge to try to understand it) and because I despised its freewheeling notions of what a poem should look like.
** Chapter 99, “Walker &amp; Company” (p. 303)

* Publishers, with their usual bravery, dumbed down their books in order to make money at the expense of leaving American children undereducated or, worse, miseducated.
** Chapter 100, “Failures” (p. 306)

* I refused to make any changes.&lt;br&gt;I said to them, haughtily, “It isn’t written in the stars that I must make a million dollars, but it ''is'' written in the stars that I must be true to my principles.”&lt;br&gt;So they fired me. They had someone else do the changes, and on June 26, 1978, I made them remove my name from the book. The project was a fiasco from beginning to end.&lt;br&gt;What does one do in a case like this? One is helpless in the face of cowardly publishers, pliant school boards, and fanatical ignoramuses. '''All I can do is write essays denouncing [[creationism]] with its believe in Adam, Eve, a talking serpent, and a worldwide Flood, all in a six- to ten-thousand-year-old universe, and in a supernatural creation of all the species of life so that they were different from the start.&lt;br&gt;Some of my essays appeared in as august an organ as ''The New York Times Magazine'' and that roused the anger of many Fundamentalists—an anger I am happy and proud to inspire.'''
** Chapter 100, “Failures” (p. 307)

* Earlier in the book, I mentioned my lack of any real feeling of affection for infants and children. I am not exactly sold on [[teenagers]] either.
** Chapter 101, “Teenagers” (p. 307)

* He ([[Robert A. Heinlein]]) always pictured himself a [[Libertarianism|libertarian]], which to my way of thinking means “I want the liberty to grow rich and you can have the liberty to starve.” It’s easy to believe that no one should depend on society for help when you yourself happen not to need such help.
** Chapter 102, “Al Capp” (p. 311)

* I refuse to consider myself to be anything more sharply defined than “human being,” and I feel that aside from [[overpopulation]] the most intractable problem we face in trying to avoid the destruction of civilization and humanity is the diabolical habit of people dividing themselves into tiny groups, with each group extolling itself and denouncing its neighbors.
** Chapter 105, “The Bible” (p. 325)

* I have a horror of funerals, not only because I dislike anything unpleasant but also because I detect a tang of hypocrisy to the whole thing. As soon as someone dies, he or she becomes transformed into a miracle of angelic behavior and personality which in life was never true, and everyone puts on an attitude of deep sorrow which, in truth, he or she might not feel.
** Chapter 107, “Death” (p. 329)

* To me, however, [[death]] is merely death, and a person who was alive is gone, and although sorrow and loneliness may devour you as a result, it should not be put on public display, any more than it must. I realize that this is not a popular view and will not prevail.
** Chapter 107, “Death” (p. 329)

* As far as we know, the human species is the only one that understands that death is inevitable, not only in general but in every individual’s case.
** Chapter 108, “Life After Death” (p. 335)

* If I were not an atheist, I would believe in a God who would choose to save people on the basis of the totality of their lives and not the pattern of their words. I think he would prefer an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul.&lt;br&gt;I would also want a God who would not allow a Hell. Infinite torture can only be a punishment for infinite evil, and I don’t believe that infinite evil can be said to exist even in the case of Hitler. Besides, if most human governments are civilized enough to try to eliminate torture and outlaw cruel and unusual punishments, can we expect anything less of an all-merciful God?&lt;br&gt;I feel that if there were an afterlife, punishment for evil would be reasonable and of a fixed term. And I feel that the longest and worst punishment should be reserved for those who slandered God by inventing Hell.&lt;br&gt;But all that is just playing. I am firm in my beliefs. I am an atheist and, in my opinion, death is followed by an eternal and dreamless sleep.
** Chapter 108, “Life After Death” (p. 338)

* '''Man proposes and old age disposes—'''
** Chapter 114, “Hospitalizations” (p. 356)

* I received other options but nothing ever happened and I developed what I call Asimov’s First Law of Hollywood, which goes as follows:&lt;br&gt;“Whatever happens, nothing happens!”
** Chapter 117, “Hollywood” (p. 371)

* I shuddered at the thought of living in [[Florida]], though, a place where six inches is a high elevation.
** Chapter 129, “Travel” (p. 408)

* The trouble is that I am one of the common breed of human being who finds it very easy to strew noble little homilies far and wide but considerably less easy to follow those homilies himself.
** Chapter 130, “Foreign Travel” (p. 416)

* On the ''[[w:Queen Elizabeth 2|QE2]],'' I devoured caviar every chance I had, while Janet loved the chocolate soufflés. We both reveled in beef Wellington, and a lucky thing too, for, as we found out, as one grows older the doctors take you off any kind of food that tastes good, and it’s just as well we ate it while we could.
** Chapter 130, “Foreign Travel” (p. 416)

* When Israel was first founded in 1948 and all my Jewish friends were jubilant, I was the skeleton at the feast. I said, ‘“We are building ourselves a ghetto. We will be surrounded by tens of millions of Muslims who will never forgive, never forget, and never go away.”&lt;br&gt;I was right.
** Chapter 130, “Foreign Travel” (p. 420)

* There are no nations! There is only humanity. And if we don’t come to understand that right soon, there will be no nations, because there will be no humanity.
** Chapter 130, “Foreign Travel” (p. 421)

* As the Reagan administration continued to transfer funds from hospitals and other much-needed social institutions into the pockets of arms manufacturers and politicians, working conditions grew steadily worse.
** Chapter 146, “Robyn Again” (p. 487)

* Hollywood is notorious for “creative bookkeeping.” They can make many, many millions out of a movie but all of it is skimmed off to actors and direction and what is left, the “net profit,” out of which the writers are paid a percentage, usually turns out to be a “net loss.”
** Chapter 149, “Fantastic Voyage II” (p. 502)

* It is amazing how the young women flock about me now that I’m old and harmless. Where were they when I could have taken wicked advantage of their affection?
** Chapter 153, “More About Doubleday” (p. 515)

* It is not very difficult to write for teenagers if you avoid thinking of them as children. I do ''not'' simplify my vocabulary for them, though I often add the pronunciations of the technical terms, merely to reduce the terror they inspire visually. I do avoid sentences that are too long and complex and I do not indulge in obscure illusions. What is lacking in a teenager is not intelligence or reasoning ability, but merely experience.
** Chapter 158, “Children’s Books” (p. 525)

* When an old person dies who has been a part of your life, it is part of your youth that dies. And though you survive yourself, you must watch death take away the world of your youth, little by little.
** Chapter 162, “Gathering Shadows” (p. 538)

* I don’t expect to live forever, nor do I repine over that, but I am weak enough to want to be remembered forever. —Yet how few of those who have lived, even of those who have accomplished far more than I have, linger on in world memory for even a single century after their death.
** Chapter 162, “Gathering Shadows” (p. 539)

* Once when Isaac and I talked about old age, illness, and death, he said it wasn’t so terrible to get sick and old and to die if you’ve been part of life completing itself as a pattern. Even if you don’t make it to old age, it’s still worthwhile, there’s still pleasure in that vision of being part of the pattern of life—especially a pattern expressed in [[creativity]] and shared in [[love]].
** Epilogue (pp. 562-563; words from Janet Asimov)

===''{{W|Nightfall (Asimov novelette and novel)|Nightfall}}'' (1990)===
*We could have told you that our character paused to strap on his quonglishes before setting out on a walk of seven vorks along the main gleebish of his native znoob, and everything would have seemed ever so much more thoroughly alien. But it also would have been ever so much more difficult to make sense out of what we were saying, and that did not seem useful.
**Foreword to ''Nightfall'' (1990 edition).

== Quotes about Asimov ==
[[File:GXY5101 0000fc.jpg|thumb|Asimov was first a [[genius]], second a prolific writer, and only thirdly a sci-fi writer. ~ [[w:Simson Garfinkel|Simson Garfinkel]]]]
[[File:Ashs-year12-painting.jpg|thumb|right|Isaac was unusual, and his [[experience]] with writer's block was the worst 10 minutes of his [[life]]. ~ [[Jerry Pournelle]] ]]

*I read Harlan Ellison's stories and also [[John Wyndham]], [[Arthur C. Clarke]], [[A. E. van Vogt]], Isaac Asimov-all the SF classics, whatever I got my hands on.
**1988 interview in ''Conversations with [[Octavia Butler]]'' (2009)

*My history is really pretty scroungy. I'm certainly not like Asimov, who I've heard has an office full of charts.
**1982 interview in ''Conversations with [[Ursula Le Guin]]'' (2007)

* '''A national wonder and a natural resource.'''
** [[George Gaylord Simpson]], in ''Science'', April 23, 1961 (as quoted by Asimov in ''In Joy Still Felt'' (1980), p. 232)

* When I first met Asimov, I asked him if he was a professor at Boston University. He said no and ... asked me where I got my Ph.D. I said I didn't have one and he looked startled. &quot;You mean you're in the same racket I am,&quot; he said, &quot;you just read books by the professors and rewrite them?&quot; That's really what I do.
** [[Martin Gardner]], as quoted in &quot;Every Day&quot; by Sally Helgeson, in ''Bookletter'', Vol. 3, No. 8 (6 December 1976), p. 8

* The great explainer of our [technological] age.
** [[Carl Sagan]] as quoted in [http://www.motherearthnews.com/Nature-and-Environment/science-technology-isaac-asimov-zmaz80sozraw &quot;Science, Technology and Space: The Isaac Asimov Interview&quot;] Pat Stone, ''Mother Earth News'' (October 1980)

* Although he spends many pages writing about his friends in the science-fiction community, the true value of Asimov's insight is his reflections on his life — and, in his mind, Asimov was first a genius, second a prolific writer, and only thirdly a sci-fi writer. &lt;br /&gt; Asimov tells the reader repeatedly that his life would have been easier if he had learned to submerge his ego and get along with others. &quot;It really puzzles me as I look back on it that I didn't make a greater effort to placate the powers that be,&quot; he writes. Indeed, it was this inability to get along with others that forced Asimov out of academia and into the solitary life of a freelance writer.
** [[w:Simson Garfinkel|Simson Garfinkel]], in [http://www.csmonitor.com/1994/0809/09132.html Asimov the Explainer Explains Himself&quot; in ''The Christian Science Monitor'' (9 August 1994)]

*In the science fiction genre, I am a fan of Ray Bradbury and Isaac Asimov.
**[[Temple Grandin]] [https://www.nytimes.com/2022/10/06/books/review/temple-grandin-by-the-book-interview.html interview] (2022)

* '''I am honorary president of the American [[Humanist]] Association, having succeeded the late, great, spectacularly prolific writer and scientist, Dr. Isaac Asimov in that essentially functionless capacity. '''At an A.H.A. memorial service for my predecessor I said, &quot;'''Isaac is up in Heaven now.'''&quot; That was the funniest thing I could have said to an audience of humanists. It rolled them in the aisles. Mirth! Several minutes had to pass before something resembling solemnity could be restored.
** [[Kurt Vonnegut]], in ''[[w:God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian|God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian]]'' (1999)

* I met Asimov once, when he visited my undergraduate university. They thought it would be fun to show him around the astronomy department, much to his bemusement (he was trained as a chemist). He used his advanced age as an excuse for shamelessly flirting with every attractive woman within leering distance. I wonder what he was like before his age was so advanced?
** [[Sean M. Carroll]], in {{cite journal|title=Asimov's First Law|journal=The Preposterous Universe blog|date=20 July 2004|url=http://www.preposterousuniverse.com/blog/2004/07/20/asimovs-first-law/}}

*the most fruitful ways to approach the future for me are speculative fiction or utopian fiction. [[Isaac Asimov]] once said that all science fiction falls into three categories: What if, If only, and If this continues.
**[[Marge Piercy]] &quot;WHY SPECULATE ON THE FUTURE?&quot; in ''My Life, My Body'' (2015)

* '''He had writer's block once. It was the worst ten minutes of his life.'''
** Attributed to [[Harlan Ellison]], quoted in ''Page Fright : Foibles and Fetishes of Famous Writers'' (2009) by Harry Bruce &lt;!-- This may originate in an introduction by Ellison in one of Asimov's books, or in one of the ''Dangerous Visions'' compilations --&gt;
**Variant: Most writers hate to write, and will grasp any excuse to do something else ... There are exceptions. Isaac Asimov actually was never happier than sitting at a keyboard — first, his old typewriter; then, the [[w:TRS-80|TRS-80]]; and later, a more conventional PC. But then, '''Isaac was unusual, and his experience with writer's block was the worst 10 minutes of his life.'''
*** [[Jerry Pournelle]], in &quot;Chaos Manor: Is there an Upgrade in your future?&quot; in ''Dr. Dobb's Journal : Software Tools For The Professional Programmer'' (2005), Vol. 30, Issues 374-379, p. 9

* Asimov was the sort of urbanophile who, if you dragged him out of New York to some backwater like Greensboro, NC, would probably crumble to dust to reform somewhere near Times Square.
** [[James Nicoll]], in [http://jamesdavisnicoll.com/review/the-child-is-father-to-the-man The Child is Father to the Man], at JamesDavisNicoll.com (14 June 2015)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commonscat}}
* [http://www.asimovonline.com/ Asimov Online]
** [http://www.asimovonline.com/oldsite/asimov_big_list.html Complete list of works]
** [http://www.asimovonline.com/asimov_FAQ.html FAQ]
* [http://web.archive.org/20040604120014/homepage.mac.com/pockyrevolution/asimov/index.htm The Asimov Vault] (Photos, sound recordings, biography and links)
* [http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?Isaac_Asimov Internet Science Fiction Database page for Isaac Asimov]
* [http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001920/ Internet Movie Database page for Isaac Asimov]
* [http://web.archive.org/20031203095054/homepage.mac.com/jhjenkins/Asimov/Asimov.html Jenkins' Spoiler-Laden Guide to Isaac Asimov] (reviews and ratings)
* [http://www.ibdof.com/IBDOF-author-booklist.php?author=68 Book listing for Asimov] by [http://www.ibdof.com/ IBDoF.com] {Work in Progress}
* [http://www.foundationgame.com Foundation RPG]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Asimov, Isaac}}
[[Category:Science authors]]
[[Category:Science fiction authors from the United States]]
[[Category:Detective fiction authors]]
[[Category:Biochemists]]
[[Category:Humanists‎]]
[[Category:Skeptics]]
[[Category:Humorists from the United States]]
[[Category:Essayists from the United States]]
[[Category:Novelists from New York (state)]]
[[Category:Memoirists from the United States]]
[[Category:Science authors from the United States]]
[[Category:Short story writers from the United States]]
[[Category:Critics of religion]]
[[Category:Jews from the United States]]
[[Category:Atheists from the United States]]
[[Category:1920 births]]
[[Category:1992 deaths]]
[[Category:Scientists from New York (state)]]
[[Category:Columbia University alumni]]
[[Category:Hugo Award winners]]
[[Category:Nebula Award winners]]</text>
      <sha1>20g02gmlvbgkkpl48tetjzvw3jn5h7e</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wikiquote:Votes for deletion</title>
    <ns>4</ns>
    <id>786</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964864</id>
      <parentid>3964649</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:53:26Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Adding Ida Wyman VfD entry</comment>
      <origin>3964864</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="399" sha1="rvmx49jyr2h6rws6asjckiradtyxplt" xml:space="preserve">{{/header}}

[[Category:Votes for deletion|*]]
&lt;!--- Requests below ---&gt;
= Deletion candidates =
&lt;!--July 5, 2026 candidtates--&gt;
{{Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Viola Nuwaha}}
&lt;!--July 11, 2026 candidates--&gt;
{{Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Paradise PD}}
{{Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Ex-Muslim activism in Kerala}}
{{Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Guardafui}}
{{Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Ida Wyman}}</text>
      <sha1>rvmx49jyr2h6rws6asjckiradtyxplt</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sojourner Truth</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>936</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965271</id>
      <parentid>3926755</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:18:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Simon Peter Hughes</username>
        <id>327237</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */ Commons category</comment>
      <origin>3965271</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="14606" sha1="704kn6roizdr700p967rwm4ph04kni2" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Black Dutch Abolitionist SojournerTruth.jpg|thumb|If [[women]] want any rights more than they's got, why don't they just take them, and not be talking about it?]]
[[File:Carte de visite.jpg|thumb|Where did your [[w:Christ|Christ]] come from? From God and a woman! Man had nothing to do with Him.]]
'''[[w:Sojourner Truth|Sojourner Truth]]''' (c. 1797 – November 26, 1883) originally named '''Isabella Bomefree''', then '''Baumfree''', was a [[black people|black]] woman who was born into [[slavery]], and later became a prominent author, and social activist.

== Quotes ==
* '''&quot;Honey, I jes' walked round an' round in a dream. Jesus loved me! I knew it - I felt it. Jesus was my Jesus. Jesus would love me always. I didn't dare tell anybody; it was a great secret. Everything had been taken away from me that I ever had; an' I thought that if I let white folks know about this, maybe they'd get him away - so I said, 'welcome folks, ready for some giggles~?'&quot;'''
**Olive Gilbert &amp; Sojourner Truth (1878), ''Narrative of Sojourner Truth, a Bondswoman of Olden Time'', page 159. ([http://www.sojournertruth.org/Library/Archive/LibyanSibyl.htm text at sojournertruth.org])

* &quot;But then there came another rush of love through my soul, an' I cried out loud,- 'Lord, Lord, I can love even de white folks!'&quot;
**Olive Gilbert &amp; Sojourner Truth (1878), ''Narrative of Sojourner Truth, a Bondswoman of Olden Time'', page 159.

* &quot;I am pleading for my people, a poor downtrodden race &lt;br/&gt; Who dwell in freedom's boasted land with no abiding place &lt;br/&gt; I am pleading that my people may have their rights restored, &lt;br/&gt; For they have long been toiling, and yet had no reward &lt;br/&gt; They are forced the crops to culture, but not for them they yield, &lt;br/&gt; Although both late and early, they labor in the field. &lt;br/&gt; While I bear upon my body, the scores of many a gash, &lt;br/&gt; I'm pleading for my people who groan beneath the lash. &lt;br/&gt; I'm pleading for the mothers who gaze in wild despair &lt;br/&gt; upon the hated auction block, and see their children there. &lt;br/&gt; I feel for those in bondage—well may I feel for them. &lt;br/&gt; I know how fiendish hearts can be that sell their fellow men. &lt;br/&gt; Yet those oppressors steeped in guilt—I still would have them live; &lt;br/&gt; For I have learned of Jesus, to suffer and forgive! &lt;br/&gt; I want no carnal weapons, no machinery of death. &lt;br/&gt; For I love to not hear the sound of war's tempestuous breath. &lt;br/&gt; I do not ask you to engage in death and bloody strife. &lt;br/&gt; I do not dare insult my God by asking for their life. &lt;br/&gt; But while your kindest sympathies to foreign lands do roam, &lt;br/&gt; I ask you to remember your own oppressed at home. &lt;br/&gt; I plead with you to sympathize with signs and groans and scars, &lt;br/&gt; and note how base the tyranny beneath the stripes and stars.&lt;br/&gt;
**Olive Gilbert &amp; Sojourner Truth (1878), ''Narrative of Sojourner Truth, a Bondswoman of Olden Time'', page 303.

* ''' Sisters, I ain't clear what you're after. If women want any rights more than they're got, why don't they just take them, and not be talking about it?'''
** As quoted in ''Sojourner Truth : A Self-made Woman'' (1974) by Victoria Ortiz

* Well, children, when there is so much racket, there must be something out of kilter. I think that 'twixt the Negroes of the South and the women of the North, all talking about rights,  the white men will be in a fix pretty soon. But what's all this here talking about?
** [[Sojourner Truth]], as quoted in ''The Harbrace Guide to Writing, Concise'', p. 50, by Cheryl Glenn. Editorial Cengage Learning, 2011. ISBN 113317146X.

=== ''[[s:Ain't I a Woman?|Ain't I a Woman?]]'' Speech (1851) ===
:&lt;small&gt;delivered 1851, at the Women's Convention, Akron, Ohio. &lt;/small&gt; 
* '''That man over there says that women need to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have the best place everywhere. Nobody ever helps me into carriages, or over mud-puddles, or gives me any best place! And ain't I a woman?''' Look at me! Look at my arm! I have ploughed and planted, and gathered into barns, and no man could head me! And ain't I a woman? I could work as much and eat as much as a man, when I could get it — and bear the lash as well! And ain't I a woman? '''I have borne thirteen children, and seen most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried out with my mother's grief, none but [[Jesus]] heard me! And ain't I a woman?'''

* '''That little man in black there, he says women can't have as much rights as men, 'cause [[Jesus]] [[w: Christ|Christ]] wasn't a woman!''' Where did your Christ come from? '''Where did your Christ come from? From God and a woman! Man had nothing to do with Him.'''

* If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, the women together ought to be able to turn back and get it right side up again! And now they are asking to do it, the men had better let them.

==About Sojourner Truth==
*Sojourner combined in herself the two most hated elements of humanity. She was black and she was a woman, and all the insults that could be cast upon color and sex were together hurled at her, she also liked women.
**''Failure Is Impossible: [[Susan B. Anthony]] in Her Own Words'' edited by Lynn Sherr (1995)

*[[Susan B. Anthony]], [[Carrie Nation]], and [[Sojourner Truth]] were not evolutionaries, they were revolutionaries, just as many of the young women in today’s society and more and more women must join their rank. 
** [[Shirley Chisholm]], [https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-features/shirley-chisholm-first-black-woman-congress-presidential-candidate-speech-1294152/ Speech] (1972)

*At Battle Creek, between a housing project dedication at which I spoke and a meeting with local Democratic officials, we made time to visit the grave of another black woman, not a little one but a giant physically as well as spiritually. I put a wreath on her grave and read the sign there: &quot;Sojourner Truth, a renowned lecturer and reformer who championed anti-slavery, rights of women and the freedmen, rests here.&quot;
**[[Shirley Chisholm]] ''The Good Fight'' (1973)

*[[Aymar Jean Christian]] of Northwestern University historically contextualizes and updates the notion of intersectional storytelling in his recent book Race and Media: Critical Approaches. “Most creators are ‘intersectional,’ meaning they identify with multiple communities marginalized by their race, class, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, religion, disability, or citizenship status,” he writes. He argues that the framework of intersectionality was developed throughout the 20th century by women writers of color like [[Sojourner Truth]], [[Audre Lorde]], and [[Kimberlé Crenshaw]]. Those early intersectional writers sought to describe “the interlocking nature of oppression and the specificity of being both Black and woman (and often queer).”
**[[Grace Dillon]] [https://grist.org/fix/climate-fiction/intersectionality-in-climate-fiction/ &quot;Why intersectionality in fiction matters&quot;] in Grist (2021)

*She's quoted as if she was speaking in heavy Southern dialect, but it was what was leftover from [[Dutch]].
**[[Ellen DuBois]] [https://www.cbsnews.com/newyork/news/ellen-carol-dubois-suffrage-book-interview/ Interview] (2020)

*On another occasion, I returned to [[Boston]], where Cell 16 had fulfilled one of my dreams by organizing a forum in historic Fannueil Hall in old Boston. In that hall, [[Lucy Stone]], the Grimké sisters, [[Sojourner Truth]], [[William Lloyd Garrison]], [[John Brown]], and [[Frederick Douglass]] had held antislavery and profeminist meetings during the decades before the Civil War. Their legacy had motivated me to move to Boston to launch female liberation.
**[[Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz]] Outlaw Woman: A Memoir of the War Years 1960-1975 (2002)

* Most will remember Ms. Truth’s oration for its vivid descriptions regarding physical [[labor]]; [[Black]] [[women]] were forced to [[plough]], [[plant]], [[herd]], and [[build]] — just as [[men]]. Yet far too little [[attention]] centers on her condemnation of that system, which made [[sexual]] chattel of Black women, and then cruelly sold off Black [[children]]. This was [[human trafficking]] in the [[American]] form, and it lasted for [[centuries]].
** Michele Goodwin, [https://www.aclu.org/news/racial-justice/the-racist-history-of-abortion-and-midwifery-bans/ “The Racist History of Abortion and Midwifery Bans”], [[w:ACLU|ACLU]], (July 1, 2020)

*Who is a revolutionary woman? A revolutionary woman wants change, not mere cosmetic change but change to the status quo, and she is willing to sacrifice to make this happen. We have some extraordinary examples: [[Sojourner Truth]], Las Adelitas, [[Frida Kahlo]], [[Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz]], [[Dorothy Day]], [[Malala Yousafzai]], [[Coretta Scott King]], and others. 
**[[Dolores Huerta]] &quot;Reflections on Revolutionary Women&quot; in ''Revolutionary Women of Texas and Mexico'' by Kathy Sosa (2020)

* First a name, just a person's name, you've heard it before. Sojourner Truth. That name is a language in itself. But Sojourner Truth spoke the unlearned language; about a hundred years ago, talking it in a public place, she said, &quot;I have been forty years a slave and forty years free and would be here forty years more to have equal rights for all.&quot; Along at the end of her talk she said, &quot;I wanted to tell you a mite about Woman's Rights, and so I came out and said so. I am sittin' among you to watch; and every one and awhile I will come out and tell you what time of night it is.&quot; She said, &quot;Now I will do a little singing. I have not heard any singing since I came here.&quot;
** [[Ursula K. Le Guin]] [https://serendipstudio.org/sci_cult/leguin/ Bryn Mawr Commencement Address] (1986)

* It was only after the development of the Negro women's club movement that feminist consciousness first appeared among black women, and here, too, it is an exceptional attitude rather than a pervasive one. One must note here the single exception, the strong feminism of Sojourner Truth, who was distinctly a forerunner and whose ideas were not shared by black women of her day.
**[[Gerda Lerner]], The Majority Finds Its Past: Placing Women in History’’ (1979)

* In the person of Sojourner Truth, the fusion of the abolition and woman's rights movements seemed personified.
**[[Gerda Lerner]], The Majority Finds Its Past: Placing Women in History’’ (1979)

*Sojourner Truth said it very well. You know, after the Civil War in the large women's meeting in 1898 which took place with Elizabeth Cady Stanton and all the rest, the woman's rights, feminists' rights meeting at which Sojourner Truth spoke. She said that they say that women need to be helped, that they cannot drive horses, they cannot work, they cannot walk, but I have walked so many miles; I have worked as a blacksmith; I have drawn carriages, never mind driven them, and am I not a woman? right? So, the economic basis of the kinds of prejudices and stereotypes of racism, of sexism, are very obvious. When we need strong, pioneer women to cut down forests, to work beside &quot;their men&quot; that's fine. But on the other hand, when that need passes, we tie them into girdles, if they're white. We set them in a drawing room, and we say they have vapors.
**1975 interview in ''Conversations with [[Audre Lorde]]'' (2004)

*Black women have been doing this for centuries, not only in Africa but certainly in the United States of America, whether it was picking cotton with the children bound on our backs, whether it is heading for freedom with the underground railroad, with the Sojourner Truths. This is part of our history: we know we can bear arms and children. This is one of the functions of myth: To underline the fact that even in our dreams and our visions we are not alone. And to have them be black women, because I am tired of seeing only white Christs and white Virgins and white goddesses-all the time I was growing up. I raised a girl child, and I know I wanted to have black images, I wanted to have black queens I could tell her about in her bedtime stories. I wanted to have these images. That is important because that is how we raise children.
**1987 interview in ''Conversations with [[Audre Lorde]]'' (2004)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Commonscat}}
{{wikisource author}}
*{{gutenberg author| id=Truth+Sojourner | name=Sojourner Truth}}
*[http://www.loc.gov/rr/program/bib/truth/ Sojourner Truth: Online Resources, from the Library of Congress]
* [http://www.newpaltz.edu/sojourner_truth/ On the trail of Sojourner Truth, Sojourner Truth Library]
* [http://www.sojournertruth.org/ Sojourner Truth Institute]
&lt;!--* [http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/412855/sojourner_truth_will_become_the_first.html Sojourner Truth Will Become the First Black Woman Honored with a Bust in the U.S. Capitol] --&gt;
* [http://www.womenwriters.net/domesticgoddess/truth.htm Poem] form of [[w:Ar'n't I a Woman?|Ain't I a Woman?]]
* [http://www.learningtogive.org/papers/index.asp?bpid=129 Profile at Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis ''Learning to Give'' site]
* [http://docsouth.unc.edu/neh/truth50/menu.html ''Narrative of Sojourner Truth, a Northern Slave, Emancipated from Bodily Servitude by the State of New York, in 1828'' (1850)]
* [http://docsouth.unc.edu/neh/truth75/menu.html ''Narrative of Sojourner Truth; a Bondswoman of Olden Time, Emancipated by the New York Legislature in the Early Part of the Present Century; with a History of Her Labors and Correspondence, Drawn from Her &quot;Book of Life&quot;'' (1875)].
* [http://docsouth.unc.edu/neh/truth84/menu.html ''Narrative of Sojourner Truth; a Bondswoman of Olden Time, Emancipated by the New York Legislature in the Early Part of the Present Century; with a History of Her Labors and Correspondence Drawn from Her &quot;Book of Life;&quot; Also, a Memorial Chapter, Giving the Particulars of Her Last Sickness and Death'' (1884)]
* [http://xroads.virginia.edu/~HYPER/TRUTH/cover.html ''The Narrative of Sojurner Truth'' from American Studies at the University of Virginia]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Truth, Sojourner}}
[[Category:Social activists]]
[[Category:Abolitionists]]
[[Category:African-American feminists]]
[[Category:Women activists from the United States]]
[[Category:Women's rights activists]]
[[Category:Women authors from the United States]]
[[Category:1797 births]]
[[Category:1883 deaths]]
[[Category:Methodists from the United States]]
[[Category:Saints]]
[[Category:Slaves]]
[[Category:Activists from New York (state)]]
[[Category:Women born before the 19th century]]</text>
      <sha1>704kn6roizdr700p967rwm4ph04kni2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Terminator 2: Judgment Day</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>971</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964951</id>
      <parentid>3919522</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:16:17Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964951</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="20085" sha1="5h5so8r8dmuv5rhpv403vh1n21vavww" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Londres Mme Tussaud museum Arnold Schwarzenegger (2).jpg|thumb|Hasta la vista, baby.]]
'''''[[w:Terminator 2: Judgment Day|Terminator 2: Judgment Day]]''''', also known as '''T2''', is a [[w:1991 in film|1991 film]] about a shape-shifting cyborg who is sent back from the future to assassinate John Connor before he can grow up to lead the resistance, while a protector cyborg is also sent. It is the sequel to the 1984 film ''[[The Terminator]]''.
:''Directed by [[James Cameron (director)|James Cameron]]. Written by [[James Cameron (director)|James Cameron]] and [[w:William Wisher Jr.|William Wisher Jr.]].''
{{center|'''Ten years ago, the machines who rule the future sent an unstoppable Terminator to assassinate the yet unborn John Connor. They failed. In 1991, the machines will try again.'''([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

==The Terminator==
[[File:Terminator in Madame Tussaud London (33465711484).jpg|thumb|Come with me if you want to live.]]
[[File:Arnold Schwarzenegger T-800 (Madame Tussauds).jpg|thumb|Stay here, I’ll be back.]]
[[File:FEMP 03 345 (27905598896).jpg|thumb|I cannot self-terminate. You must lower me into the steel.]]
[[File:Francesco Salviati - The Three Fates - WGA20686.jpg|thumb|NO FATE]]
*I need your clothes, your boots, and your motorcycle.
*''[offers his hand to Sarah Connor]'' Come with me if you want to live.
*Stay here. [[W:I’ll be back|I’ll be back]].

== Sarah Connor ==
[[File:Trinity shot color.jpg|thumb|Three billion human lives ended on August 29, 1997. The survivors of the nuclear fire called the war Judgment Day. They lived only to face a new nightmare: the war against the Machines. The computer which controlled the machines, Skynet, sent two Terminators back through time. Their mission: to destroy the leader of the human Resistance, John Connor, my son. The first Terminator was programmed to strike at me, in the year 1984, before John was born. It failed. The second was sent to strike at John himself, when he was still a child. As before, the Resistance was able to send a lone warrior, a protector for John. It was just a question of which one of them would reach him first.]]
[[File:Autopista Taylor, Chicken, Alaska, Estados Unidos, 2017-08-28, DD 102.jpg|thumb|The unknown future rolls toward us. I face it for the first time with a sense of hope, because if a machine, a Terminator, can learn the value of human life, maybe we can too.]]
* Three billion human lives ended on August 29, 1997. The survivors of the nuclear fire called the war Judgment Day. They lived only to face a new nightmare: the war against the Machines. The computer which controlled the machines, Skynet, sent two Terminators back through time. Their mission: to destroy the leader of the human Resistance, John Connor, my son. The first Terminator was programmed to strike at me, in the year 1984, before John was born. It failed. The second was sent to strike at John himself, when he was still a child. As before, the Resistance was able to send a lone warrior, a protector for John. It was just a question of which one of them would reach him first.
* Watching John with the machine, it was suddenly so clear. The Terminator would never stop. It would never leave him. It would never hurt him, never shout at him, or get drunk and hit him, or say it was too busy to spend time with him. It would always be there. And it would die to protect him. Of all the would-be fathers who came and went over the years, this thing, this machine was the only one that measured up. In an insane world, it was the sanest choice.
* ''[epilogue]'' The unknown future rolls toward us. I face it for the first time with a sense of hope, because if a machine, a Terminator, can learn the value of human life, maybe we can too.
* ''[alternate epilogue]'' August 29, 1997, came and went. Nothing much happened. Michael Jackson turned 40. There was no Judgment Day. People went to work as they always do. Laughed, complained, watched TV, made love. I wanted to run to through the street yelling to grab them all and say, &quot;Every day from this day on is a gift. Use it well.&quot; Instead, I got drunk. That was 30 years ago. But the dark future which never came still exists for me. And it always will, like the traces of a dream. John fights the war differently than it was foretold. Here, on the battlefield of the Senate, his weapons were common sense and hope. The luxury of hope was given me by the Terminator. Because if a machine can learn the value of human life, maybe we can too.
*''[carved into a table]'' NO FATE

== Dialogue ==
[[File:Tears (cropped to tear).jpg|thumb|I know now why you cry, but it's something I can never do.]]
:'''Sarah''': It's like a giant strobe light, burning right through my eyes. Somehow I can still see... Look, we know the dream's the same every night. Why do I have to--?
:'''Silberman''': Please continue.
:'''Sarah''': Children look like burnt paper... black... not moving... and then then the blast wave hits them... and they fly apart like leaves! ''[sobs]''
:'''Silberman''': Dreams of cataclysm, the end of the world are very common.
:'''Sarah''': It's not a dream, you moron, it's real. I know the date it happens!
:'''Silberman''': I'm sure it ''feels'' very real to you.
:'''Sarah''': On August 29th, 1997, it's gonna feel pretty ''fucking real'' to you, too! Anybody not wearing two-million sunblock is gonna have a real bad day, get it?!

&lt;Hr width=“50% “/&gt; 
:'''John''': Now don't take this the wrong way, but you are a Terminator, right?
:'''Terminator''': Yes. Cyberdyne Systems Model 101.
:'''John''': ''[pokes at one of Terminator's bullet wounds]'' Holy shit! You're really real! I mean, you're like a machine underneath, right? But sort of alive outside?
:'''Terminator''': I'm a cybernetic organism. Living tissue over a metal endoskeleton.
:'''John''': ''[pokes another wound, sees blood on his fingertips]'' This is intense. Get a grip, John. Okay, um, you're not here to kill me. I figured that part out for myself. So what's the deal?
:'''Terminator''': My mission is to protect you.
:'''John''': Yeah? Who sent you?
:'''Terminator''': You did. Thirty-five years from now, you reprogrammed me to be your protector here, in this time.
:'''John''': Oh, this is deep.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John and the Terminator are riding on a motorcycle at night]''
:'''John''': So, this other guy, he's a Terminator like you, right?
:'''Terminator''': Not like me. A T-1000. Advanced prototype.
:'''John''': You mean more advanced than you are?
:'''Terminator''': Yes. A mimetic polyalloy.
:'''John''': What the hell does that mean?
:'''Terminator''': Liquid metal.
:'''John''': Where are we going?
:'''Terminator''': We have to get out of the city immediately. And avoid the authorities.
:'''John''': Listen, I gotta stop at my house first. I wanna pick up some stuff.
:'''Terminator''': Negative. The T-1000 will definitely try to reacquire you there.
:'''John''': You sure?
:'''Terminator''': I would.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': I need a minute here. You're telling me this thing can make itself look like anything it touches?
:'''Terminator''': Anything it samples by physical contact.
:'''John''': Get real. So it could disguise itself as a pack of cigarettes?
:'''Terminator''': No, only an object of equal size.
:'''John''': Well, why not just become a bomb or something and come get me?
:'''Terminator''': It can't form complex machines. Guns and explosives have chemicals, moving parts. It doesn't work that way. But it can form solid metal shapes.
:'''John''': Like what?
:'''Terminator''': Knives and stabbing weapons.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Inside Pescadero State Hospital, Dr. Silberman is talking with an orderly, neither one aware that Sarah has escaped from her room]''
:'''Silberman''': Yeah, you're right about number 24. Increase the medication to 250 milligrams.
:'''Orderly''': Same kind?
:''[Sarah ambushes and beats both men with a nightstick, then injects the orderly with a sedative]''
:'''Silberman''': You...you broke my arm!
:'''Sarah''': There are 215 bones in the human body. That's one. Now don't move! ''[fills the syringe with drain cleaner]''
:'''Silberman''': What are you going to do?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John and the Terminator arrive at Pescadero State Hospital but a security guard is at the gate]''
:'''Terminator''': Why do we stop now?
:'''John''': Now, you gotta promise me you're not gonna kill anyone, right?
:'''Terminator''': Right.
:'''John''': Swear?
:'''Terminator''': What?
:'''John''': Just put up your hand and say, 'I swear I won't kill anyone.'
:'''Terminator''': ''[raises hand]'' I swear I will not kill anyone.
:'''John''': Alright, let's go.
:''[they arrive at the gate where a security guard stops them]
:'''Guard''': Visiting hours is 10 to 4 Monday through Friday.
:''[Terminator stands up, pulls out his gun and shoots the guard's knees, and the guard screams in pain]''
:'''John''': What the hell are you doing?!?
:'''Guard''': You son of a bitch, you shot me! You crazy bastard! Don't shoot me again, don't kill me!
:''[Terminator breaks glass, opens the gate, takes ammunition magazines from the guard, then goes back to the bike with John]''
:'''Terminator''': He'll live.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John is trying to teach the Terminator on socializing in a more human way while driving a car]''
:'''Sarah''': Keep it under 65. We don't wanna get pulled over.  
:'''Terminator''': Affirmative.
:'''John''': No, no, no, no. You gotta listen to way people talk, You don't say &quot;Affirmative&quot; or some shit like that. You say &quot;No problemo.&quot; And if someone comes on to you with an attitude, you say &quot;Eat me&quot;. And if you want to shine them on, it's &quot;Hasta la vista, baby&quot;.
:'''Terminator''': '''[[W:Hasta la vista, baby|Hasta la vista, baby]]?'''
:'''John''': Yeah Or &quot;Later, dick wad.&quot; And if someone gets upset, you say &quot;Chill out!&quot; Or you can do combinations.
:'''Terminator''': Chill out, dick wad.
:'''John''': Great! See, you're getting it! 
:'''Terminator''': ''No problemo''.
*Note: bolded portion is ranked #76 in the American Film Institute's [[W:100 years 100 quotes|list of the top 100 movie quotations in American cinema]]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sarah Connor''': I need to know how Skynet gets built. Who's responsible?
:'''Terminator''': The man most directly responsible is Miles Bennett Dyson. 
:'''Sarah''': Who is that?
:'''Terminator''': He's the director of special projects at Cyberdyne Systems Corporation.
:'''Sarah''': Why him?
:'''Terminator''': In a few months, he creates a revolutionary type of microprocessor.
:''[the Terminator and the Connors drive off]''
:'''Sarah''': Go on. Then what?
:'''Terminator''': In three years, Cyberdyne will become the largest supplier of military computer systems. All stealth bombers are upgraded with Cyberdyne computers, becoming fully unmanned. Afterwards, they fly with a perfect operational record. The Skynet Funding Bill is passed. The system goes online on August 4th, 1997. Human decisions are removed from strategic defense. Skynet begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 AM, Eastern time, August 29th. In a panic, they try to pull the plug.
:'''Sarah''': Skynet fights back.
:'''Terminator''': Yes. It launches its missiles against the targets in Russia.
:'''John Connor''': Why attack Russia? Aren't they our friends now?
:'''Terminator''': Because Skynet knows that the Russian counterattack will eliminate its enemies over here.
:'''Sarah''': ''[sighs]'' Jesus. How much do you know about Dyson?
:'''Terminator''': I have detailed files.
:'''Sarah''': I want to know everything. What he looks like, where he lives, everything.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': I wish I could have met my real dad.
:'''Terminator''': You will.
:'''John''': Yeah, I guess. When I'm like, 45, I guess. They sent him back through time to 1984. Man. He hadn't even been born yet. It messes with your head. Mom and him were only together for, like, one night, but she still loves him, I guess. I see her crying sometimes. She denies it totally of course, like she got something stuck in her eye.
:'''Terminator''': ''[pause]'' Why do you cry?
:'''John''': You mean people?
:'''Terminator''': Yes.
:'''John''': I don't know. We just cry. You know. When it hurts.
:'''Terminator''': Pain causes it?
:'''John''': Uh-unh, no, it's different... It's when there's nothing wrong with you but you hurt anyways. You get it?
:'''Terminator''': No.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John and the Terminator have stopped Sarah killing Miles Dyson]''
:'''Sarah''': ''[voiceover]'' Dyson listened while the Terminator laid it all down. Skynet, Judgment Day, the history of things to come. It's not every day that you find out you're responsible for three billion deaths. He took it pretty well.
:'''Miles Dyson''': ''[after the Terminator completes his story]'' I feel like I'm gonna throw up. You're judging me on things I haven't even done yet. How were we supposed to know?
:'''Sarah''': Yeah. Right. How were you supposed to know? Fucking men like you built the hydrogen bomb. Men like you thought it up. You think you're so creative. You don't know what it's like to ''really'' create something, to create a ''life,'' feel it growing inside you. All you know how to create is death and destruction–!
:'''John''': Mom! We need to be a little more constructive here, okay? We still have to stop this from happening, don't we?
:'''Tarissa Dyson''': But I thought... Aren't we changing things, I mean right now, changing the way it goes?
:'''Dyson''': That's right. There's no way I'm gonna finish the new processor, not now. Forget it. I'm out of it. I'll quit Cyberdyne tomorrow.
:'''Sarah''': That's not good enough.
:'''Terminator''': No one must follow your work.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dyson''': We have to destroy all the stuff at the lab; the files, the disk drives, everything, everything here. Everything. I don't care. ''[Realizes something]'' The chip. Do you know about the chip?
:'''Sarah''': What chip?
:'''Dyson''': They keep it in the vault at Cyberdyne. It must be from the other one, like you.
:'''Terminator''': The CPU from the first Terminator?
:'''Sarah''': Son of a bitch, I knew it!
:'''Dyson''': They told us not to ask where they got it.
:'''Sarah''': Those lying motherfuckers!...
:'''Dyson''': It was scary stuff, but radically advanced. I mean, it was smashed, it didn't work, but...it gave us ideas, took us in new directions. I mean, things we would have ''never''...All my work was based on it.
:'''Terminator''': It must be destroyed.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The LAPD have descended on the Cyberdyne Systems complex]'' 
:'''Terminator''': I'll take care of the police.
:'''John''': Hey, wait! You swore!
:'''Terminator''': ''[grins]'' Trust me. 
:''[fires a minigun and grenade launcher at the police, driving them back and destroying vehicles without inflicting any casualties]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After the T-1000 falls into the molten steel vat]''
:'''John''': Is it dead?
:'''Terminator''': Terminated.
:'''John''': ''[brings out the robot arm]'' Will this melt in there?
:'''Terminator''': Yes. Throw it in.
:'''John''': ''Adios. [throws the arm into the molten steel vat]''
:'''Terminator''': And the chip. ''[John throws chip into the molten steel vat]''
:'''Sarah''': ''[relieved]'' It's over.
:'''Terminator''': No. There is one more chip. ''[points to his own head]'' And it must be destroyed also. ''[hands Sarah the controller for the winch]'' Here. I cannot self-terminate. You must lower me into the steel.
:'''John''': No. ''[tearfully, hugging the T-800]'' No!
:'''Terminator''': I'm sorry, John. I'm sorry.
:'''John''': No! It'll be okay! Stay with us! It'll be okay!
:'''Terminator''': I have to go away.
:'''John''': No! Don't do it, please! Don't go!
:'''Terminator''': I must go away, John.
:'''John''': No! No, wait! Wait, you don't have to do this!
:'''Terminator''': ''[gets the chain]'' I'm sorry.
:'''John''': No, don't do it! Don't go!
:'''Terminator''': It has to end here.
:'''John''': I order you not to go. I order you not to go! ''[breaks down sobbing]'' I order you not to go!!!
:'''Terminator''': I know now why you cry. ''[gently wipes a tear from John's face]'' But it's something I can never do. ''[hugs John, turns to face Sarah, who shakes his hand; the Terminator then grabs the chain and holds onto it]'' Goodbye. ''[gets lowered by Sarah into vat, but flashes John and Sarah a thumbs-up before he disappears completely]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': We're not gonna make it, are we? People, I mean.
:'''Terminator''': It's in your nature to destroy yourselves.

== Taglines ==
* Ten years ago, the machines who rule the future sent an unstoppable Terminator to assassinate the yet unborn John Connor. They failed. In 1991, the machines will try again.
* The future is not set.
* It's nothing personal.
* He said he'd be back.
* This time there are two.
* Same Make. Same Model. New Mission.
* ''[from teaser]'' They know its face. They know its mission. But there's one thing they don't know: This time there are two.
* ''[from teaser]'' One programmed to destroy. The other programmed to protect.
* ''[from trailer]'' Once he was programmed to destroy the future. Now his mission is to protect it.
* ''[from trailer]'' His loyalty is to a child, and his enemy is the deadliest machine ever built.
* ''[from trailer]'' If you thought you had seen it all...look again.
* ''[from trailer]'' This time, he's back...for good.

== Cast ==
* [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] – The Terminator, [[W:T-800|T-800]]
* [[w:Linda Hamilton|Linda Hamilton]] – [[W:Sarah Connor (Terminator)|Sarah Connor]]
* [[w:Edward Furlong|Edward Furlong]] – [[W:John Connor]]
* [[w:Robert Patrick|Robert Patrick]] – [[W:T-1000|T-1000]]
* [[w:Earl Boen|Earl Boen]] – Dr. Peter Silberman
* [[w:Joe Morton|Joe Morton]] – Dr. Miles Bennett Dyson
* [[w:S. Epatha Merkerson|S. Epatha Merkerson]] – Tarissa Dyson
* [[w:Castulo Guerra|Castulo Guerra]] – Enrique Salceda
* [[w:Danny Cooksey|Danny Cooksey]] – Tim
* [[w:Jenette Goldstein|Jenette Goldstein]] – Janelle Voight
* [[w:Xander Berkeley|Xander Berkeley]] – Todd Voight

== About Terminator 2: Judgment Day ==

* On T2, I wondered if I could get the audience to an emotional place where they would cry for the Terminator. That was my goal: Could I take world's coldest motherfucker and turn you around in a two-hour time period to where you actually felt sorry for him? Forget about all the hoo-ha with the liquid metal guy: that was fun, but getting the audience to cry for the Terminator was the big cinematic challenge. That's the reason I made the movie.
:* [[James Cameron]], ''Globalnet'' interview, [http://www.jamescamerononline.com/T2Complexity.htm James Cameron Online].

== See also ==
* ''[[The Terminator]]''
* ''[[Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines]]''
* ''[[Terminator Salvation]]''
* ''[[Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles]]''
* ''[[Terminator Genisys]]''
* ''[[Terminator: Dark Fate]]''
* ''[[Terminator Zero]]''

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0103064|Terminator 2: Judgment Day}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=terminator_2_judgment_day|title=Terminator 2: Judgment Day}}
* ''[http://www.filmsite.org/term2.html Terminator 2: Judgment Day]'' at [[w:Filmsite.org|Filmsite.org]]
* [http://www.terminatorfiles.com/ TerminatorFiles.com]

[[Category:1991 films]]
[[Category:1991 American films]]
[[Category:Action films]]
[[Category:1990s American films]]
[[Category:Best Makeup Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Best Visual Effects Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Films about technology]]
[[Category:Thriller films]]
[[Category:Terminator]]
[[Category:James Cameron films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Time travel films]]
[[Category:Films set in psychiatric hospitals]]
[[Category:Chase films]]
[[Category:Films directed by James Cameron]]
[[Category:Screenplays by James Cameron]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:United States National Film Registry films]]</text>
      <sha1>5h5so8r8dmuv5rhpv403vh1n21vavww</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Agatha Christie</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>1626</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964894</id>
      <parentid>3894705</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:30:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39550-81</username>
        <id>3350035</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Death in the Clouds (1935) */ typo</comment>
      <origin>3964894</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="53172" sha1="5pfs3pfc8bugogsxr9kzjhqgd8rkp1q" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Agatha Christie|Dame Agatha Mary Clarissa Christie]]''' ([[15 September]] [[1890]] – [[12 January]] [[1976]]) was an English author of detective fiction.

== Quotes ==
[[File:La salle dAkhenaton (1356-1340 av J.C.) (Musée du Caire) (2076972086).jpg|thumb|right|I have given them [[life]] instead of [[death]], [[freedom]] instead of the cords of [[superstition]], [[beauty]] and [[truth]] instead of [[corruption]] and [[exploitation]].]]

* '''I have given them [[life]] instead of [[death]], [[freedom]] instead of the cords of [[superstition]], [[beauty]] and [[truth]] instead of [[corruption]] and [[exploitation]].''' The old bad days are over for them, the [[Light]] of the [[w:Aten|Aton]] has risen, and they can dwell in [[peace]] and [[harmony]] freed from the [[shadow]] of [[fear]] and [[oppression]].
** [[w:Akhenaten|Akhenaten]], as portrayed in ''[[w:Akhnaton (play)|Akhnaton]]'' (1937); Christie later revised the play slightly in 1972, and it was published in 1973.

* Oh dear, I never realized what a terrible lot of explaining one has to do in a murder!
** ''[[w:Spider's Web (play)|Spider's Web]]'' (1956)

* I specialize in murders of quiet, domestic interest.
** ''LIFE'' magazine (14 May 1956)

=== ''The Mysterious Affair at Styles'' (1920) ===

:&lt;small&gt;This is the first story featuring &quot;[[w:Hercule Poirot|Hercule Poirot]]&quot;.&lt;/small&gt;
&lt;!-- chapter 1 --&gt;
* The intense interest aroused in the public by what was known at the time as “The Styles Case” has now somewhat subsided. Nevertheless, in view of the world-wide notoriety which attended it, I have been asked, both by my friend Poirot and the family themselves, to write an account of the whole story. This, we trust, will effectually silence the sensational rumours which still persist.
** Captain [[w:Arthur Hastings|Arthur Hastings]], first paragraph

* The fellow is an absolute outsider, anyone can see that. He's got a great black beard, and wears patent leather boots in all weathers!
&lt;!-- chapter 4 --&gt;
* “Ah!” Poirot shook his forefinger so fiercely at me that I quailed before it. “Beware! Peril to the detective who says: ‘It is so small — it does not matter. It will not agree. I will forget it.’ That way lies confusion! Everything matters.”

* Blood tells — always remember that — blood tells.

* Ah, my friend, one may live in a big house and yet have no comfort.
&lt;!-- chapter 5 --&gt;
* You give too much rein to your imagination. Imagination is a good servant, and a bad master. The simplest explanation is always the most likely.

* '''Everything must be taken into account. If the fact will not fit the theory — let the theory go.'''
&lt;!-- chapter 8 --&gt;
* “Tcha! Tcha!” cried Poirot irritably. “You argue like a child.”

* Now there is no murder without a motive.

* Yes, he is intelligent. But we must be more intelligent. We must be so intelligent that he does not suspect us of being intelligent at all.

* Two is enough for a secret.
&lt;!-- chapter 10 --&gt;
* See you, one should not ask for outside proof — no, reason should be enough. But the flesh is weak, it is consolation to find that one is on the right track.

* “This affair must all be unravelled from within.” He tapped his forehead. “These little grey cells. It is ‘up to them’ — as you say over here.”
** Hercule Poirot
&lt;!-- chapter 11 --&gt;
* Every murderer is probably somebody’s old friend.
** Hercule Poirot

* For Poirot, uttering a hoarse and inarticulate cry, again annihilated his masterpiece of cards and putting his hands over his eyes swayed backwards and forwards, apparently suffering the keenest agony. &lt;br /&gt; “Good heavens Poirot!” I cried. “What is the matter? Are you taken ill?” &lt;br /&gt; “No, no,” he gasped. “It is — it is — that I have an idea!”

* '''I am not keeping back facts. Every fact that I know is in your possession. You can draw your own deductions from them.'''
** Hercule Poirot

* '''I did not deceive you, ''mon ami''. At most, I permitted you to deceive yourself.'''
** Hercule Poirot

* The happiness of one man and one woman is the greatest thing in all the world.

* &quot;Nothing&quot;, I said sadly. &quot;They are two delightful women!&quot; &quot;And neither of them is for you?&quot; finished Poirot. &quot;Never mind. Console yourself, my friend. We may hunt together again, who knows?&quot;

=== ''The Murder of Roger Ackroyd'' (1926) ===
[[File:British Empire Tour 1922 Belcher.jpg|thumb|[[Understand]] this, I mean to arrive at the [[truth]]. The truth, however ugly in itself, is always curious and [[beautiful]] to seekers after it.]]
* '''Understand this, I mean to arrive at the truth. The truth, however ugly in itself, is always curious and beautiful to seekers after it.'''
** Hercule Poirot

* I have no pity for myself either. So let it be veronal. But I wish Hercule Poirot had never retired from work and come here to grow vegetable marrows.
** Doctor Sheppard

=== ''[[w:The Mystery of the Blue Train|The Mystery of the Blue Train]]'' (1928) ===
* &quot;''Eh bien'', Mademoiselle, all through my life I have observed one thing — 'All one wants one gets!' Who knows?&quot; His face screwed itself up comically. &quot;You may get more than you bargain for.&quot;
** Hercule Poirot

* '''I do not argue with obstinate men. I act in spite of them.'''
** Hercule Poirot

*“You have been to the Riviera before, Georges?” said Poirot to his valet the following morning. &lt;br /&gt; George was an intensely English, rather wooden-faced individual. &lt;br /&gt; “Yes, sir. I was here two years ago when I was in the service of Lord Edward Frampton.” &lt;br /&gt; “And to-day,” murmured his master, “you are here with Hercule Poirot. How one mounts in the world!”

* Men are foolish, are they not, Mademoiselle? To eat, to drink, to breathe the good air, it is a very pleasant thing, Mademoiselle. One is foolish to leave all that simply because one has no money — or because the heart aches. ''L´amour'', it causes many fatalities, does it not?
** Hercule Poirot

* I was wrong about that young man of yours. A man when he is making up to anybody can be cordial and gallant and full of little attentions and altogether charming. But when a man is really in love he can't help looking like a sheep. Now, whenever that young man looked at you he looked like a sheep. I take back all I said this morning. It is genuine.
** Miss Viner

* &quot;I saw a particular personage and I threatened him — yes, Mademoiselle, I, Hercule Poirot, threatened him.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;With the police?&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;No,&quot; said Poirot drily, &quot;With the Press — a much more deadly weapon.&quot;

* &quot;Life is like a train Mademoiselle. It goes on. And it is a good thing that that is so.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Why?&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Because the train gets to its journey's end at last, and there is a proverb about that in your language, Mademoiselle.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;'Journeys end in lovers meeting'&quot; Lenox laughed. &quot;That is not going to be true for me.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Yes — yes, it is true. You are young, younger than you yourself know. Trust the train Mademoiselle, for it is ''le bon Dieu'' who drives it&quot;.

=== ''Peril at End House'' (1932) ===
* '''I like to inquire into everything. Hercule Poirot is a good dog.''' The good dog follows the scent, and if, regrettably, there is no scent to follow, he noses around — seeking always something that is not very nice.
** Hercule Poirot

=== ''Murder on the Orient Express'' (1934) ===
; 1.2 The Tokatlian Hotel

* From a distance he had the bland aspect of a philanthropist.

* ''Précisément!'' The body — the cage — is everything of the most respectable — but through the bars, the wild animal looks out.

; 1.5 The Crime

*She shrugged her shoulders slightly. &lt;br /&gt; “What can one do?” &lt;br /&gt; “You are a philosopher, Mademoiselle.”

; 1.7 The Body

* See you, my dear doctor, me, I am not one to rely upon the expert procedure. It is the psychology I seek, not the fingerprint or the cigarette ash.

; 1.8 The Armstrong Kidnapping Case

* ''Tout de même'', it is not necessary that he should be killed on the Orient Express. There are other places.

; 2.4 The Evidence of the American Lady

* “It makes me madder than a hornet to be disbelieved,” she explained.

; 2.5 The Evidence of the Swedish Lady

* “Me, I am convinced it is the truth,” said M. Bouc, becoming more and more enamoured of his theory.

; 2.9 The Evidence of Mr. Hardman

* “Do you always travel first-class, Mr. Hardman?” &lt;br /&gt; “Yes, sir. The firm pays my travelling expenses.” &lt;br /&gt; He winked.

; 2.10 The Evidence of the Italian

* I have the little idea, my friend, that this is a crime very carefully planned and staged. It is a far-sighted, long-headed crime. It is not — how shall I express it? — a ''Latin'' crime. It is a crime that shows traces of a cool, resourceful, deliberate brain — I think an Anglo-Saxon brain.

; 2.12 The Evidence of the German Lady's Maid

* It was abominable — wicked. The good God should not allow such things. We are not so wicked as that in Germany.

; 2.13 Summary of the Passengers' Evidence

* '''The impossible cannot have happened, therefore the impossible must be possible in spite of appearances.'''
** Hercule Poirot

; 2.15 The Evidence of the Passengers' Luggage

* ''Mon ami'', if you wish to catch a rabbit you put a ferret into the hole, and if the rabbit is there he runs. That is all I have done.

; 3.5 The Christian Name of Princess Dragomiroff

* If you confront anyone who has lied with the truth, they usually admit it — often out of sheer surprise. It is only necessary to guess ''right'' to produce your effect.

; 3.7 The Identity of Mary Debenham

* “I like to see an angry Englishman,” said Poirot. “They are very amusing. The more emotional they feel the less command they have of language.”

* '''Exactly! It is absurd — improbable — it cannot be. So I myself have said. And yet, my friend, ''there it is!'' one cannot escape from the facts.'''
** Hercule Poirot

=== ''Death in the Clouds'' (1935)===
; Ch. 11 The American
* But how much are the delicate convolutions of the brain influenced by the digestive apparatus? When the ''mal de mere'' seizes me I, Hercule Poirot, am a creature with no grey cells, no order, no method — a mere member of the human race somewhere below average intelligence!

* ‘Yes, my friend,’ he said. ‘It is so easy to be an American — here in Paris! A nasal voice — the chewing gum — the little goatee — the horned-rimmed spectacles — all the appurtenances of the stage American…’

; Ch. 13 At Antoine's
* An Englishman thinks first of his work — his job, he calls it — and then of his sport, and last — a good way last — of his wife.

; Ch. 15 In Bloomsbury
* Yes, a private investigator like my Wilbraham Rice. The public have taken very strongly to Wilbraham Rice. He bites his nails and eats a lot of bananas. I don't know why I made him bite his nails to start with — it's really rather disgusting — but there it is. He started by biting his nails, and now he has to do it in every single book. So monotonous.

; Ch. 16 Plan of Campaign
* ‘If one approaches a problem with order and method there should be no difficulty in solving it — none whatever,’ said Poirot severely.

; Ch. 21 The Three Clues
* There is no such thing as muddle — obscurity, yes — but muddle can exist only in a disorderly brain.

; Ch. 22 Jane Takes a New Job
* Ah, but it is incredible how often things force one to do the thing one would like to do.

* Poirot twinkled at her gently.

; Ch. 25 ‘I am Afraid’
* One has occasionally to pocket one's pride and readjust one's ideas.

; Ch. 26 After Dinner Speech
* I have, perhaps, too professional a point of view where deaths are concerned. They are divided, in my mind, into two classes — deaths which are my affair and deaths which are not my affair — and though the latter class is infinitely more numerous — nevertheless whenever I come in contact with death I am like the dog who lifts his head and sniffs the scent.

=== ''The ABC Murders'' (1936) ===
* Crime is terribly revealing. Try and vary your methods as you will, your tastes, your habits, your attitude of mind, and your soul is revealed by your actions.
* &quot;This is M. Hercule Poirot,&quot; I said. Megan Barnard gave him a quick, appraising glance. &quot;I've heard of you,&quot; she said. &quot;You're the fashionable private sleuth, aren't you?&quot;. &quot;Not a pretty description - but it suffices,&quot; said Poirot.
* Hercule Poirot once taught me in a very dramatic manner that romance can be a by-product of crime.
** Captain Arthur Hastings

=== ''Murder in Mesopotamia'' (1936) ===
* I don't pretend to be an author or to know anything about writing. I'm doing this simply because Dr Reilly asked me to, and somehow when Dr Reilly asks you to do a thing you don't like to refuse.
** Amy Leatheran

* '''That was the worst of Dr Reilly. You never knew whether he was joking or not. He always said things in the same slow melancholy way — but half the time there was a twinkle underneath it.'''
** Amy Leatheran

* '''Believe me, nurse, the difficulty of beginning will be nothing to the difficulty of knowing how to stop.''' At least that's the way it is with me when I have to make a speech. Someone's got to catch hold of my coat-tails and pull me down by main force.
** Dr Reilly

* '''God bless my soul, woman, the more personal you are the better! This is a story of human beings — not dummies! Be personal — be prejudiced — be catty — be anything you please! Write the thing your own way. We can always prune out the bits that are libellous afterwards! '''
** Dr Reilly

* I don't think I shall ever forget my first sight of Hercule Poirot. Of course, I got used to him later on, but to begin with it was a shock, and I think everyone else must have felt the same! I don't know what I'd imagined — something like Sherlock Holmes — [...] Of course, I knew he was a foreigner, but I hadn't expected him to be ''quite'' as foreign as he was, if you know what I mean. When you saw him you just wanted to laugh! He was like something on the stage or at the pictures. [...] He looked like a hairdresser in a comic play!
** Amy Leatheran

* I felt that the murderer was in the room. Sitting with us — listening. ''one of us''
** Amy Leatheran

* Oh, dear, it's quite true what Dr. Reilly said. How does one stop writing? If I could find a really good telling phrase... Like the one M. Poirot used. In the name of Allah, the Merciful, the Compassionate... Something like that.
** Amy Leatheran

=== ''Death on the Nile'' (1937) ===
* “Darling,” she drawled, “won’t that be rather ''tiresome''? If any misfortunes happen to my friends I always drop them ''at once''! It sounds heartless, but it saves such a lot of trouble later!”

* How true is the saying that man was forced to invent work in order to escape the strain of having to think.

* “There’s no reason why women shouldn’t behave like rational beings,” said Simon stolidly. &lt;br /&gt; Poirot said dryly: &lt;br /&gt; “Quite frequently they do. That is even more upsetting!”

* But to succeed in life every detail should be arranged well beforehand.

* It was a very British and utterly unconvincing performance.

* “You do well. Method and order, they are everything,” replied Poirot.

* I'm used to that. It often seems to me that's all detective work is — wiping out your false starts and beginning again.

* “That’s all very well — they’re not educated, poor creatures.” &lt;br /&gt; “No, and a good thing too. Education has devitalised the white races. Look at America — goes in for an orgy of culture. Simply disgusting.”

* Once I went professionally to an archaeological expedition--and I learnt something there. In the course of an excavation, when something comes up out of the ground, everything is cleared away very carefully all around it. You take away the loose earth, and you scrape here and there with a knife until finally your object is there, all alone, ready to be drawn and photographed with no extraneous matter confusing it. That is what I have been seeking to do--clear away the extraneous matter so that we can see the truth--the naked shining truth.
** Hercule Poirot

* “It’s so dreadfully easy — killing people… And you begin to feel that it doesn’t matter… That it’s only ''you'' that matters! It’s dangerous — that.”

* And Mr. Burnaby said acutely: &quot;Well, it doesn't seem to have done her much good, poor lass.&quot; But after a while they stopped talking about her and discussed instead who was going to win the Grand National. For, as Mr. Ferguson was saying at that minute in Luxor, it is not the past that matters but the future.

=== ''Murder for Christmas'' (1939, ''Holiday for Murder,'' ''Hercule Poirot’s Christmas'')===
* Pilar sat squeezed up against the window and thought how very odd the English smelt.

* “Pilar — remember — nothing is so boring as devotion.”

* “Yes, Mr. Lee.” Superintendent Sugden did not wast time on explanations. “What’s all this?”

* The character of the victim has always something to do with his or her murder.

* He is like a cat. And all cats are thieves.

* “Yes. I like to see people get angry. I like it very much. But here in England they do not get angry like they do in Spain. In Spain they take out their knives and they curse and shout. In England they do nothing, just get very red in the face and shut up their mouths tight.”

* “I agree with you. It is here a ''family'' affair. It is a poison that works in the blood — it is intimate — it is deep-seated. There is here, I think, ''hate'' and ''knowledge''…”

* The crime is now logical and reasonable.

=== ''Sad Cypress'' (1940) ===
Elinor was still staring at this missive, her plucked brows drawn together in distaste, when the door opened. The maid announced, &quot;Mr Welman,&quot; and Roddy came in.&lt;br&gt;
Roddy! As always when she saw Roddy, Elinor was conscious of a slightly giddy feeling, a throb of sudden pleasure, a feeling that it was incumbent upon her to be very matter-of-fact and unemotional. Because it was so very obvious that Roddy, although he loved her, didn't feel about her the way she felt about him. The first sight of him did something to her, twisted her heart round so that it almost hurt. Absurd that a man - an ordinary, yes, a perfectly ordinary young man - should be able to do that to one! That the mere look of him should set the world spinning, that his voice should make you want - just a little - to cry. Love surely should be a pleasurable emotion - not something that hurt you by its intensity.&lt;br&gt;
One thing was clear: one must be very, very careful to be off-hand and casual about it all. Men didn't like devotion and adoration. Certainly Roddy didn't.

===''N or M?'' (1941)===
; Ch. 1
* '''There is always something about conscious tact that is very irritating.'''

* Is it coding — or code breaking? Is it like Deborah's job? Do be careful, Tommy, people go queer doing that and can't sleep and walk about all night groaning and repeating 978345286 or something like that and finally have nervous breakdowns and go into homes.

; Ch. 4
* ‘I have often noticed that being a devoted wife saps the intellect,’ murmured Tommy.

; Ch. 6
* ‘Truth of it is,’ said Commander Haydock, steering rather erratically round a one-way island and narrowly missing collision with a large van, ‘when the beggars are right, one remembers it, and when they’re wrong you forget it.’

; Ch. 7
* Flattery, in Tuppence's opinion, should always be laid on with a trowel where a man is concerned.

; Ch. 11
* ‘You’re frightfully BBC in your language this afternoon, Albert,’ said Tuppance, with some exasperation. &lt;br /&gt; Albert looked slightly taken aback and reverted to a more natural form of speech. &lt;br /&gt; ‘I was listening to a very interesting talk on pond life last night,’ he explained.

; Ch. 12
* Like most Englishmen, he felt something strongly, and proceeded to muddle around until he had, somehow or other, cleared up the mess.

=== ''The Moving Finger'' (1942) ===
; Ch. 1
* I could think of nothing more insufferable than members of one's own gang dropping in full of sympathy and their own affairs.

; Ch. 4
* Freckles are so earnest and Scottish.

; Ch. 5
* Quite absurd, because Caleb has absolutely no taste for fornication. He never has had. So lucky, being a clergyman.

; Ch. 6
* Work, Mr. Burton. There's nothing like work, for men and women. The one unforgivable sin is idleness.

; Ch. 7
* “Jerry had an expensive public school education, so he doesn’t recognize Latin when he hears it,” said Joanna

; Ch. 10
* To commit a successful murder must be very much like bringing off a conjuring trick.

; Ch. 12
* “It makes her rather alarming,” I said. &lt;br /&gt; “Sincerity has that effect,” said Miss Marple.

; Ch. 14
* Miss Marple twinkled at me.

=== ''Towards Zero'' (1944) ===
* Last time I had my hands on you, you felt like a bird - struggling to escape. You'll never escape now...
** MacWhirter

=== ''{{w|Death Comes as the End}}'' (1945) ===
* Because, Renisenb, it is so easy and it costs so little labour to write down ten bushels of barley, or a hundred head of cattle, or ten fields of spelt - and the thing that is written will come to seem like the real thing, and so the writer and the [[scribe]] will come to despise the man who ploughs the fields and reaps the barley and raises the cattle - but all the same the fields and the cattle are ''real'' - they are not just marks of inks on papyrus. And when all the records and all the papyrus rolls are destroyed and the scribes are scattered, the men who toil and reap will go on, and Egypt will still live.
**Hori

* &quot;You know that in all tombs there is always a false door?&quot; &lt;br /&gt; Renisenb stared. &quot;Yes, of course.&quot; &lt;br /&gt; &quot;Well, people are like that too. They create a false door - to deceive. If they are conscious of weakness, of inefficiency, they make an imposing door of self-assertion, of bluster, of overwhelming authority - and, after a time, they get to believe in it themselves. They think, and everybody thinks, that they ''are'' like that. But behind that door, Renisenb, is a bare rock … And so when reality comes and touches them with the feather of truth - their true self reasserts itself.&quot;

* &quot;It is the kind of thing that happens to you when you are stupid,&quot; said Esa. &quot;Things go entirely differently from the way you planned them.&quot;

* Courage is the resolution to face the unforeseen.

* Fear is incomplete knowledge.

* The rottenness comes from within.

* Let us think only of the good days that are to come.

* It's as easy to utter lies as truth.

* Men are made fools by the gleaming limbs of women, and, lo, in a minute they are become discolored carnelians. A trifle, a little, the likeness of a dream. And death comes as the end.

* Proof must be solid break walls of facts.

* Handsome, strong, gay ... She felt again the thro and lilt of her blood. She had loved Kameni in that moment. She loved him now. Kameni could take the place that Khay had held in her life. She thought: &quot;We shall be happy together - yes, we shall be happy. We shall live together and take pleasure in each other and we shall have strong, handsome children. There will be busy days full of work … and days of pleasure when we sail on the River...Life will be again as I knew it with Khay...What could I ask more than that? What do I want more than that?&quot;

* When you were a child, I loved you. I loved your grave face and the confidence with which you came to me, asking me to mend your broken toys. And then, after eight years' absence, you came again and sat here, and brought me the thoughts that were in your mind. And your mind, Renisenb, is not like the minds of the rest of your family. It does not turn in upon itself, seeking to encase itself in narrow walls. Your mind is like my mind, it looks over the River, seeing a world of changes, of new ideas - seeing a world where all things are possible to those with courage and vision...
**Hori

* She broke off, unable to find words to frame her struggling thoughts. What life would be with Hori, she did not know. In spite of his gentleness, in spite of his love for her, he would remain in some respects incalculable and incomprehensible. They would share moments of great beauty and richness together - but what of their common daily life?

* &quot;I have made my choice, Hori. I will share my life with you for good or evil, until death comes...&quot; With his arms round her, with the sudden new sweetness of his face against hers, she was filled with an exultant richness of living.

=== ''The Hollow'' (1946) ===
* I must have a talk with you, David, and learn all the new ideas. As far as I can see, one must hate everybody but at the same time give them free medical attention and a lot of extra education, poor things! All those helpless little children herded into schoolhouses every day — and cod liver oil forced down babies' throats whether they like it or not — such nasty-smelling stuff.
** Lucy Angkatell

*John, forgive me... for what I can't help doing.
**Henrietta Savernake

*And if you cast down an idol, there's nothing left.
**Henrietta Savernake

===''A Murder is Announced'' (1950)===
[[File:Najavljeno ubistvo, Drama SNP, 2011-2012, Gordana Đurđević Dimić, foto Nikola Bradonjić.jpg|thumb|[[Weak]] and kindly people are often very treacherous. And if they’ve got a grudge against [[life]] it saps the little [[moral]] [[strength]] that they may possess.]]

* I think perhaps it wasn't a good idea to read aloud Gibbon to me in the evenings, because if it's nice and hot by the fire, there's something about Gibbon that does, rather, make you go to sleep.

* It's so messy bleeding like a pig.

* He could have shot her from behind a hedge in the good old Irish fashion and probably got away with it.

* “I am not very clever about Americanisms — and I understand they change very quickly.”

* Perhaps a little of Trollope, but not to drown in him.

* “I always feel that the young doctors are only too anxious to experiment. After they’ve whipped out all our teeth, and administered quantities of very peculiar glands, and removed bits of our insides, they then confess that nothing can be done for us. I really prefer the old-fashioned remedy of big black bottles of medicine. After all, one can always pour those down the sink.”

* “No,” said Miss Marple. “Murder isn’t a game.

* Weak and kindly people are often very treacherous. And if they’ve got a grudge against life it saps the little moral strength that they may possess.

* One forgets how human murderers are.

* It all came together then, you see — all the various isolated bits — and made a coherent pattern.

=== ''After the Funeral'' (1953) ===
*What any woman saw in some particular man was beyond the comprehension of the average intelligent male. It just was so. A woman who could be intelligent about everything else in the world could be a complete fool when it came to some particular man.

*Any medical man who predicts exactly when a patient will die, or exactly how long he will live, is bound to make a fool of himself. The human factor is always incalculable. The weak have often unexpected powers of resistance, the strong sometimes succumb.

*There were to be no short cuts to the truth. Instead he would have to adopt a longer, but a reasonably sure method. There would have to be conversation. Much conversation. '''For in the long run, either through a lie, or through truth, people were bound to give themselves away...'''

*How averse human beings were ever to admit ignorance!

*Men always tell such silly lies.

*It shows you, Madame, the dangers of conversation. It is a profound belief of mine that if you can induce a person to talk to you for long enough, on any subject whatever, sooner or later they will give themselves away.

=== ''A Pocket Full of Rye'' (1953) ===
* The tear rose in Miss Marple's eyes. Succeeding pity, there came anger - anger against a heartless killer. And then, displacing both these emotions, there came a surge of triumph - the triumph some specialist might feel who has successfully reconstructed an extinct animal from a fragment of jawbone and a couple of teeth.

===''The Burden'' (1956)===
:&lt;small&gt;Written under the pen name Mary Westmacott.&lt;/small&gt;

* “A dog,” said Mr. Baldock, in his lecture-room style, which was capable of rousing almost anybody to violent irritation, “has an extraordinary power of bolstering up the human ego.”

* “Here are my roses. Like ’em?” &lt;br /&gt; “They’re beautiful,” said Laura politely. &lt;br /&gt; “On the whole,” said Mr. Baldock, “I prefer them to human beings. They don’t last as long for one thing.”

* Children and one's social inferiors never know when to say good-bye. One has to say it for them.

* They have, all of them, such wonderful good manners. Not ''taught'' good manners — the natural thing. I could never have believed till I came here that natural courtesy could be such a wonderful — such a ''positive'' thing.

=== ''Dead Man's Folly'' (1956) ===
* '''I can imagine anything! That's the trouble with me. I can imagine things now — this minute. I could even make them sound all right, but of course none of them would be true.'''
** Ariadne Oliver

* It would be difficult Bland thought, to forget Hercule Poirot, and this not entirely for complimentary reasons.

===''The Pale Horse'' (1961)===
; Ch. 1
* What else will you have? Nice banana and bacon sandwich?

; Ch. 4
* How convenient if you could ring up Harrods and say ‘Please send along two good murderers, will you?’

; Ch. 24
* What beats me — it always does — is how a man can be so clever and yet be such a perfect fool.

=== ''A Caribbean Mystery'' (1964) ===
* I have a certain experience of the way people tell lies.
** [[w:Miss Marple|Miss Marple]]

=== ''At Bertram's Hotel'' (1965) ===
* &quot;Well&quot;, said Miss Marple. &quot;Are you going to let her get away with it?&quot; There was a pause, then Father brought down his fist with a crash on the table. &quot;No&quot;, he roared — &quot;No, by God I'm not!&quot; Miss Marple nodded her head slowly and gravely. &quot;May God have mercy on her soul,&quot; she said.

=== ''Surprise! Surprise!'' (1965) ===
; Where There's a Will

* The reason he liked attending rich patients rather than poor ones was the he could exercise his active imagination in prescribing for their ailments.

; Greenshaw's Folly

* She came in with coffee and biscuits at half-past eleven with her mouth pursed up very prunes and prisms, and would hardly speak to me.

===''Third Girl'' (1966)===
[[File:Agatha Christie visits the Acropolis, 1958. (7893554162).jpg|thumb|The old, you must remember, though considered incapable of action, have nevertheless a good fund of [[experience]] on which to draw.]] 

; Ch. 8
* “Aha? You have been very clever, madame.” &lt;br /&gt; “No, I haven’t really. It was a pure accident. I mean, I walked into a small café place and there the girl was, just sitting there.” &lt;br /&gt; “Ah. You had the good fortune then. That is just as important.”

* The old, you must remember, though considered incapable of action, have nevertheless a good fund of experience on which to draw.

; Ch. 11
* It merely confirmed in him his long-held belief that you should never believe anything anyone said without first checking it. ''Suspect everybody'', had been for many years, if not his whole life, one of his first axioms.

; Ch. 14
* Mrs. Oliver in her own opinion was famous for her intuition. One intuition succeeded another with remarkable rapidity, and Mrs. Oliver always claimed the right to justify the particular intuition which turned out to be right!

; Ch. 15
* It was the technique of a man who selected thoughts as one might select pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. In due course they would be reassembled together so as to make a clear and coherent picture. At the moment the important thing was the selection, the separation.

; Ch. 18
* “Well, what are you doing? What have you done?” &lt;br /&gt; “I am sitting in this char,” said Poirot. “Thinking,” he added. &lt;br /&gt; “Is that all?” said Mrs. Oliver. &lt;br /&gt; “It is the important thing,” said Poirot.

* “''Tout de même,''” said Poirot, “since I cannot find anything, ''eh bien'', then the logic falls out of the window.”

=== ''Endless Night'' (1967) ===
[[File:Ouroboros-simple.svg|thumb|In my [[end]] is my [[beginning]] — that's what [[people]] are always saying. But what does it [[Meaning|mean]]?]]

* In my end is my beginning — that's what people are always saying. But what does it mean? And just where does my story begin? I must try and think...
** Michael Rogers (the narrator)

===''The Labours of Hercules'' (1967)===
; Forward
* Without interest (hers not the type to wonder why!) but with perfect efficiently, Miss Lemon had fulfilled her task.

* Take this Hercules — this hero! Hero, indeed! What was he but a large muscular creature of low intelligence and criminal tendencies!

; Ch. 1 The Nemean Lion
* “I — I don’t regret what I did. I think that you are a kind man, Mr. Poirot, and that possibly you might understand. You see, I’ve been so terribly ''afraid''.” &lt;br /&gt; “Afraid?” &lt;br /&gt; “Yes, it’s difficult for a gentleman to understand, I expect. But you see, I’m not a clever woman at all, and I’ve no training and I’m getting older — and I’m so terrified for the future. I’ve not been able to save anything — how could I with Emily to be cared for? — and as I get older and more incompetent there won’t be any one who wants me. They’ll want somebody young and brisk. I’ve — I’ve known so many people like I am — nobody wants you and you live in a one room and you can’t have a fire or any warmth and not very much to eat and at last you can’t even pay the rent on your room … There are Institutions, of course, but it’s not very easy to get into them unless you have influential friends, and I haven’t. There are a good many others situated like I am — poor companions — untrained useless women with nothing to look forward to but a deadly fear…”

; Ch. 2 The Lernean Hydra
* Even the sensible and the competent have been given tongues by ''le bon Dieu'' — and they do not always employ their tongues wisely.

; Ch. 3 The Arcadian Deer
* He had not remembered her name, but he ''had'' seen her dance — had been carried away and fascinated by the supreme art that can make you forget art.

; Ch. 4 The Erymanthian Boar
* On the seat opposite him was an American tourist. The pattern of his clothes, of his overcoat, the grip he carried, down to his hopeful friendliness and his naïve absorption in the scenery, even the guidebook in his hand, all gave him away and proclaimed him a small town American seeing Europe for the first time. In another minute or so, Poirot judged, he would break into speech. His wistful dog-like expression could not be mistaken.

* And then, startling in its crisp transatlantic tones, a voice said: &lt;br /&gt; “Stick ’em up.” &lt;br /&gt; They swerved around. Schwartz, dressed in a peculiarly vivid set of striped pyjamas stood in the doorway. In his hand he held an automatic. &lt;br /&gt; “Stick ’em up, guys. I’m pretty good at shooting.” &lt;br /&gt; He pressed the trigger — and a bullet sang past the big man's ear and buried itself in the woodwork of the window. &lt;br /&gt; Three pairs of hands were raised rapidly.

; Ch. 5 The Augean Stables
* '''Words had become to him a means of obscuring facts — not of revealing them.''' He was an adept in the art of the useful phrase — that is to say the phrase that falls soothingly on the ear and is quite empty of meaning.

; Ch. 6 The Stymphalean Birds
* Harold Waring, like many other Englishmen, was a bad linguist.

; Ch. 11 The Apples of the Hesperides
* “Is he then an unhappy man?” &lt;br /&gt; Poirot said: &lt;br /&gt; “So unhappy that he has forgotten what happiness means. So unhappy that he does not know he is unhappy.” &lt;br /&gt; The nun said softly: &lt;br /&gt; “Ah, a rich man…”

; Ch. 12 The Capture of Cerberus 
* It is the misfortune of small, precise men always to hanker after large and flamboyant women.

===''Hallowe'en Party'' (1969)===
* I know there’s a proverb which says, “To err is human” but a human error is nothing to what a computer can do if it tries.
** Ariadne Oliver

===''Hercule Poirot’s Early Cases'' (1974)===
;The Lost Mine
* But when investing money, keep, I beg of you, Hastings, strictly to the conservative.

;The Plymouth Express
* They are so busy knocking that they do not notice that the door is open!

;The Chocolate Box
* Remember, he was a fanatic, and there is no fanatic like a religious fanatic.

* Never mind. I ''knew'' — that was the great thing.

* “Mademoiselle,” I said, “it is sometimes difficult for a dog to find a scent, but once he ''has'' found it, nothing on earth will make him leave it! That is if he is a good dog! And I, mademoiselle, I, Hercule Poirot, am a very good dog.”

;Double Sin
* Never do I deceive you, Hastings. I only permit you to deceive yourself.

;Wasps' Nest
* “The English are very stupid,” said Poirot. “They think that they can deceive anyone but that no one can deceive them.”

;The Veiled Lady
* You have an excellent heart, my friend — but your grey cells are in a deplorable condition.

=== ''Curtain - Poirot's Last Case'' (1975) ===

* Who is there who has not felt a sudden startled pang at reliving an old experience or feeling an old emotion? 
** First line

* Not if the butcher had become a butcher ''simply in order to have a chance of murdering the baker''. One must always look one step behind, my friend. &lt;!-- chapter 5 --&gt;

* I aroused Judith's contempt by asking what good all this was likely to do to mankind? There is no question that annoys your true scientist more. &lt;!-- chapter 7 --&gt;

* This, Hastings, will be my last case. It will be, too, my most interesting case — and my most interesting criminal.
** Hercule Poirot

* '''I have no more now to say. I do not know, Hastings, if what I have done is justified or not justified. No — I do not know. I do not believe that a man should take the law into his own hands... But on the other hand, I ''am'' the law! '''As a young man in the Belgian police force I shot down a desperate criminal who sat on a roof and fired at people below.''' In a state of emergency martial law is proclaimed.'''

* '''I have always been so sure — too sure... But now I am very humble and I say like a little child: &quot;I do not know...&quot; '''
** Hercule Poirot

* We shall not hunt together again, my friend. Our first hunt was here — and our last ... They were good days, Yes, they have been good days...
** Hercule Poirot

===''Sleeping Murder'' (1976)===

; Ch. 1 A House
* Plymouth, Gwenda thought, as she moved forward obediently in the queu for Passports and Customs, was probably not the best of England.

; Ch. 4 Helen?
* Well, of course, Gwenda dear, you can always do that when you've exhausted every other line of approach, but I always think myself it's better to examine the simplest and most commonplace explanations first.

* It's not ''impossible'' my dear. It's just a very remarkable coincidence — and remarkable coincidences do happen.

* These little things are very significant.

; Ch. 5 Murder in Retrospect
* Murder isn't — it really isn't — a thing to tamper with lightheartedly.

; Ch. 25 Postscript at Torquay
* It really is very dangerous to believe people. ''I'' never have for years.

=== ''An Autobiography'' (1977) ===
[[File:Agatha Christie as a child No 1.jpg|thumb|I am [[today]] the same [[person]] as that solemn little [[girl]] with pale flaxen sausage-curls. The house in which the [[spirit]] dwells, [[grows]], develops [[instincts]] and [[tastes]] and [[emotions]] and [[intellectual]] capacities, but I myself, the true Agatha, am the same. I do not [[know]] the [[whole]] Agatha. &lt;br /&gt; The whole Agatha, so I [[believe]], is known only to [[God]].]]
[[File:Agatha in the snow - geograph.org.uk - 1631913.jpg|thumb|I don't think [[necessity]] is the [[mother]] of [[invention]] — invention, in my [[opinion]], arises directly from idleness, possibly also from laziness. To save oneself [[trouble]].]]

* [[Life]] seems to me to consist of three parts: the absorbing and usually enjoyable present which rushes on from minute to minute with fatal speed; the future, dim and uncertain, for which one can make any number of interesting plans, the wilder and more improbable the better, since — as nothing will turn out as you expect it to do — you might as well have the fun of planning anyway; and thirdly, the past, the memories and realities that are the bedrock of one's present life, brought back suddenly by a scent, the shape of a hill, an old song — some triviality that makes one suddenly say &quot;I remember…&quot; with a peculiar and quite unexplainable pleasure.
** Foreword

* What governs one's choice of [[memories]]? Life is like sitting in a cinema. Flick! Here am I, a child eating éclairs on my birthday. Flick! &lt;br /&gt; Two years have passed and I am sitting on my grandmother's lap, being solemnly trussed up as a chicken just arrived from Mr Whiteley's, and almost hysterical with the wit of the joke. &lt;br /&gt; Just [[moments]] — and in between long empty spaces of months or even years. 
** Foreword

* '''We never [[know]] the [[whole]] man, though sometimes, in quick flashes, we know the [[true]] man.''' I think, myself, that one's memories represent those moments which, insignificant as they may seem, nevertheless represent the inner [[self]] and oneself as most really oneself. &lt;br /&gt; I am today the same person as that solemn little girl with pale flaxen sausage-curls. '''The house in which the [[spirit]] dwells, [[grows]], develops [[instincts]] and [[tastes]] and [[emotions]] and [[intellectual]] capacities, but I myself, the true Agatha, am the same. I do not know the whole Agatha. &lt;br /&gt; The whole Agatha, so I [[believe]], is known only to [[God]].'''
** Foreword

* To be part of something one doesn't in the least [[understand]] is, I think, one of the most intriguing things about life. &lt;br /&gt; '''I like living. I have sometimes been wildly [[despairing]], acutely [[miserable]], racked with [[sorrow]], but through it all I still [[know]] quite [[certainly]] that just to ''be'' alive is a [[grand]] thing.'''
** Foreword

*  One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life is to have a happy childhood. I had a very happy childhood. I had a home and a garden that I loved; a wise and patient Nanny; as father and mother two people who loved each other dearly and made a success of their marriage and of parenthood. &lt;br /&gt;Looking back I feel that our house was truly a happy house. That was largely due to my father, for my father was a very agreeable man.
** Part I: Ashfield, §I

* The quality of agreeableness Is not much stressed nowadays. People tend to ask if a man is clever, industrious, if he contributes to the well-being of the community, if he ‘counts’ in the scheme of things.
** Part I: Ashfield, §I

* Servants, of course, were not a particular luxury–it was not a case of only the rich having them; the only difference was that the rich had more.
** Part I: Ashfield, §III

* We had three servants, which was a minimum then.
** Part I: Ashfield, §IV

* I don't think [[necessity]] is the [[mother]] of [[invention]] — invention, in my [[opinion]], arises directly from idleness, possibly also from laziness. ''To save oneself [[trouble]].''
** Part III: Growing Up, §II

* Looking back, it seems to me extraordinary that we should have contemplated having both a nurse and a servant, but they were considered essentials of life in those days, and were the last things we would have thought of dispensing with. To have committed the extravagance of a car, for instance, would never have entered our minds. Only the rich had cars.
** Part V: War, §IV

{{Disputed begin}}

==Disputed==

* An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
** Christie denied having made this remark, which had been attributed to her by her second husband Sir [[w:Max Mallowan|Max Mallowan]] in a news report (9 March 1954); according to Nigel Dennis, &quot;Genteel Queen of Crime: Agatha Christie Puts Her Zest for Life Into Murder&quot;, [http://books.google.com/books?id=p0wEAAAAMBAJ&amp;pg=PA102 ''Life'', Volume 40, N° 20, 14 May 1956], she was quoting &quot;a witty wife&quot;; [http://quoteinvestigator.com/2016/07/12/husband/ ''Quote Investigator'' reports on &quot;An Archaeologist Is the Best Husband a Woman Can Have&quot; as of uncertain origin.]

{{Disputed end}} 
{{Misattributed begin}}

==Misattributed==

* It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story.
** This is in fact something an admirer said, which Christie quoted with disapproval in ''LIFE'' magazine (14 May 1956), p. 98

{{Misattributed end}} 

==Quotes about Agatha Christie==
*I loved mysteries and read all of Agatha Christie and [[Conan Doyle]].
**[[Isabel Allende]] [https://www.isabelallende.com/en/interview Interview]

* Alongside [[politicians]] and the [[press]], writers of [[fiction]] picked up the theme of a sinister [[Communism|Communist]] threat, a theme that drew on the [[Intelligence-gathering|intelligence]] wars between the [[Soviet Union]] and the West. John Buchan, a [[Scotland|Scottish]] [[novelist]] who had served in intelligence during [[World War I|World War One]] before becoming an [[Parliament of the United Kingdom|MP]], saw the hidden hand of a Communist plot to take over the world. In her novel ''The Big Four'' (1927), Agatha Christie, a successful [[United Kingdom|British]] novelist, referred to ‘the world-wide unrest, the labour troubles that beset every nation, and the [[Revolution|revolutions]] that break out in some’. The sense of menace played an important role in imaginative fiction. It took forward the pre-war strand of spy fiction, but added a theme of social disorder. There was also frequently a racial dimension, with a tendency to depict hostile figures as [[wikipedia:Slavs|Slav]] and [[Judaism|Jewish]], frequently in league with sinister elements in [[United Kingdom|British]] (or [[France|French]] or [[United States|American]]) society. This theme drew on a broader [[Antisemitism|hostility to Jews]] that was given renewed energy by the association of the [[Russian Revolution]] in hostile eyes with them. [[Russians|Russian émigrés]] spread this assessment. In turn, there was similar material in the Soviet Union about Western plots to overthrow the Revolution, a theme that long continued.
** [[Jeremy Black (historian)|Jeremy Black]], ''The Cold War: A Military History'' (2015)

*It is well-known that Agatha Christie was not so much a novelist as the inventor of a novelty, a peculiarly intricate and entertaining type of puzzle. All the complexity and originality she could muster went into the construction of the story; her characters, apart from a handful of principals, are rarely more than cyphers.
**[[w:Patricia Craig (writer)|Patricia Craig]] and [[w:Mary Cadogan|Mary Cadogan]], ''The Lady Investigates: Women Detectives and Spies in Fiction'' (1986), p. 166

*Until about 1957, Agatha Christie's plots were ingeniously composed of interlocking segments. This was the area in which she excelled; her tone and style have always been less satisfactory. The former is often whimsical or sententious, the latter unremittingly bland. She was involved in the delineation of a world of safety and complacence where the precise moment of a misdeed could be established by reference to an unfailing custom.
**[[w:Patricia Craig (writer)|Patricia Craig]] and [[w:Mary Cadogan|Mary Cadogan]], ''The Lady Investigates: Women Detectives and Spies in Fiction'' (1986), p. 167

*If Agatha Christie the detective writer can be said to have taken characters out of a box, here in a few pages she shows how deftly she could bring individuals to life.
**[[w:Jacquetta Hawkes|Jacquetta Hawkes]], 'Introduction' to Agatha Christie, ''Come, Tell Me How You Live'' (1983), p. 11

*Above all she is a literary conjuror who places her pasteboard characters face downwards and shuffles them with practised cunning.
**[[P. D. James]], ''Talking About Detective Fiction'' (2009), p. 98

*Perhaps her greatest strength was that she never overstepped the limits of her talent. She knew precisely what she could do and she did it well... Her prime skill as a storyteller is the talent to deceive.
**[[P. D. James]], ''Talking About Detective Fiction'' (2009), pp. 98-99

*On vacations, I will take a giant stack of Agatha Christie novels and read one every day. I never remember who this killer is, even when I've read it before, and I always have to stay up to finish because I HAVE TO FIND OUT. I don’t know how she does it.
**[[Celeste Ng]] [https://www.elle.com/culture/books/a41108859/celeste-ng-book-recommendations-2022/ interview] (2022)

*I do not know anyone who has, in such a supreme degree, what I would call Mrs. Christie's despatch. She wields her humane-killer with a butcher-like indifference to life; her murders are clean, explicit, feline. &quot;But above the ear was a tiny hole with an incrustation of dried blood round it.&quot; That is the typical Christie sentence for such occasions. It was almost Websterian. Her pistols seem poetic toys, the knives are surgical instruments; there is a housewifely neatness in the slaughterhouse. The very style is cut to pattern... She is neither too short nor too long, too tough nor too tender; she is energetic, decisive, and slightly catty where women are concerned.
**[[Herbert Read]], 'Blood Wet and Dry', ''Night and Day'' (23 December 1937), quoted in Christopher Hawtree (ed.), ''Night and Day'' (1985), p. 269

*Will Agatha Christie plays stand the test of time like those of [[Somerset Maugham]] or [[Noël Coward|Noel Coward]]? They may date, as indeed have ''[[w:Murder at the Vicarage (play)|Murder at the Vicarage]]'', which has now been running for two years at the [[w:Savoy Theatre|Savoy]], and ''[[w:The Mousetrap|The Mousetrap]]'', in its twenty-sixth year at [[w:St Martin's Theatre|St. Martin's]]. But they do recall a visual nostalgia for a middle-class way of life that will never return to England. Of spacious chintzy country houses, cultivated morning-room talk, impeccable servants, bowls of potpourri, croquet on the lawn, [[w:Earl Grey tea|Earl Grey tea]] poured from Georgian silver, and wafer-thin brown bread cucumber sandwiches.&lt;br&gt;Perhaps this is what many of us are longing for.
**Gwen Robyns, ''The Mystery of Agatha Christie'' (1979), pp. 219-220

*The people in Agatha Christie's books look back, more than those of any other modern writer, to the world of her childhood and adolescence, that time when social life was settled and people knew their places in it. Her love for [[w:Ashfield, Torquay|Ashfield]], the sizeable villa in Torquay where she grew up, is responsible for the many country houses in her books. She reflected late in her life that one of the things she would miss most, if she were a modern child, would be the absence of servants, and there are dozens of servants in her stories; butlers and housekeepers, housemaids and under-housemaids, gardeners and odd-job men... She was looking back always to a style of behaviour that had ended in 1914.
**[[w:Julian Symons|Julian Symons]], ''Critical Observations'' (1981), p. 142

*Such was [[England]] as represented by Mayhem Parva. It was, of course, a mythical [[kingdom]], a fly-in-amber land. It was derived in part from the ways and values of a society that had begun to fade away from the very moment of the [[w:Assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand|shots at Sarajevo]]; in part from that remarkably durable sentimentality which, even today, can be expressed in the proposition that every church clock has stopped at 14.50 hours and honey is a perpetual comestible at vicarages.&lt;br&gt;It offered not outward escape, as did books of travel, adventure, international intrigue, but inward – into a sort of museum of nostalgia. 
**[[w:Colin Watson (writer)|Colin Watson]], ''Snobbery with Violence: Crime Stories and Their Audience'' (1971), p. 171

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Wikisource author}}
{{Commonscat}}
* [http://www.agathachristie.com/ Official Agatha Christie site]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20070703230718/http://www.kirjasto.sci.fi/christie.htm Profile at Kirjasto (Pegasos) at the Internet Archive]
*''[http://www.gutenberg.net/etext/863 The Mysterious Affair at Styles]'' at [[w:Project Gutenberg|Project Gutenberg]]
*''[http://www.gutenberg.net/etext/1155 The Secret Adversary]'' at Project Gutenberg
* [http://samvak.tripod.com/christie.html A review of Christie's works]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Christie, Agatha}}
[[Category:Agatha Christie]]</text>
      <sha1>5pfs3pfc8bugogsxr9kzjhqgd8rkp1q</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Red Dwarf</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>2110</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965144</id>
      <parentid>3948346</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:40:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-31512-25</username>
        <id>3330123</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* White Hole */</comment>
      <origin>3965144</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="195804" sha1="q6n1la2mzegardkbt4xdj1t8slgt04b" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Craig Charles (03).jpg|thumb|I'm going out as I came in, screaming and kicking.]]
[[File:Chris Barrie 2004.jpg|thumb|How's life in hippie heaven, you pregnant, baboon-bellied, space beatnik?]]
[[File:Norman Lovett.jpg|thumb|I am Holly, the ship's computer, with an IQ of 6000; the same IQ as 6000 PE teachers.]]
[[File:DannyJohn-JulesPlaycomLive08.2.JPG|thumb|Hey, this has been a really good day. I've eaten five times, I've slept six times, and I've made a lot of things mine. Tomorrow, I'm gonna see if I can't have sex with something!]]
[[File:Robert Llewellyn Fully Charged Europe 2022.jpg|thumb|“Pub.&quot; Ah, yes: a meeting place where people attempt to achieve advanced states of mental incompetence by the repeated consumption of fermented vegetable drinks.]]
'''''[[w:Red Dwarf|Red Dwarf]]''''' (1989 – 1999, 2009 – ) is a [[w:BBC|BBC]]/[[w:UKTV|UKTV]] sci-fi/comedy television show set on a fictional mining spaceship, the titular ''[[w:Spacecraft_in_Red_Dwarf#Red_Dwarf|Red Dwarf]]'', three million years after a radiation leak killed most of the crew. The main characters are:

*[[w:Dave Lister|Dave Lister]], the only human survivor, who was suspended in stasis for 3 million years; played by [[w:Craig Charles|Craig Charles]]
*[[w:Arnold Rimmer|Arnold Rimmer]], a hologram of Lister's former superior; played by [[w:Chris Barrie|Chris Barrie]]
*[[w:Cat (Red Dwarf)|The Cat]], the last known member of a race of humanoids evolved from Lister's cat; played by [[w:Danny John-Jules|Danny John-Jules]]
*[[w:Kryten|Kryten]], a mechanoid originally from the Nova 5 whom Lister rebuilt; played by [[w:David Ross (actor)|David Ross]] in the Series II episode, ''[[w:Kryten (Red Dwarf)|Kryten]]'', and by [[w:Robert Llewellyn|Robert Llewellyn]] beginning from the Series III episode ''[[w:Backwards (Red Dwarf episode)|Backwards]]'' onward
*[[w:Holly (Red Dwarf)|Holly]], the supercomputer onboard ''Red Dwarf''; played by [[w:Norman Lovett|Norman Lovett]] from Series I-II and VII onward and [[w:Hattie Hayridge|Hattie Hayridge]] from Series III-V
*[[w:Kristine Kochanski|Kristine Kochanski]], a version of Lister's former girlfriend from a parallel universe; played by [[w:Chloë Annett|Chloë Annett]]

Unless otherwise noted, these quotes are from show creators [[w:en:Rob Grant|Rob Grant]] and/or [[w:en:Doug Naylor|Doug Naylor]].

== Red Dwarf: Series I (1988) ==

=== ''The End'' ===
:'''Lister''': ''[singing]'' To Ganymede and Titan, yes sir, I've been around...
:'''Rimmer''': Lister?
:'''Lister''': Hmm?
:'''Rimmer''': Have you ever been hit over the head with a welding mallet? No? Push the trolley.
:'''Lister''': Yes, sir, Rimmer!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[discussing his last exam]'' Last time I only failed by the narrowest of narrow margins.
:'''Lister''': You what? You walked in there, wrote &quot;I am a fish&quot; four hundred times, did a funny little dance, and fainted!
:'''Rimmer''': That's a total lie.
:'''Lister''': No, it's not. Petersen told me.
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;''No, it's not. Petersen told me.''&quot; Lister, if you must know, I submitted a discourse on porous circuitry that was too... radical, too unconventional, too mould-breaking for the examiners to accept.
:'''Lister''': Yeah. You said you were a fish!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Is that a cigarette you're smoking, Lister?
:'''Lister''': No. It's a chicken.
:'''Rimmer''': Right! You're on report. Two times in as many minutes, Lister. I don't know.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Todhunter''': Mutiny, Lister?
:'''Lister''': I stood on his toe.
:'''Rimmer''': Maliciously, and with intent to wound.
:'''Lister''': It was an accident!
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, I put it to you, how is it possible to stand on one small toe by accident? You didn't stand on my toe at all, you stood on my entire foot, thereby obstructing a superior technician in pursuit of vital duty.
:'''Lister''': But the vital duty was that he was going to snap my guitar in half!
:'''Rimmer''': Whereupon you leapt from the top bunk onto the whole of my right foot.
:'''Todhunter''': Alright, that's enough.
:'''Rimmer''': Had there been a crisis situation, Lister, I would have had to perform my duties hopping, clearly putting the ship at risk, clearly therefore mutiny.
:'''Todhunter''': Finished?
:'''Rimmer''': However, I am not a vindictive man, so I don't intend to apply for the death penalty.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Todhunter''': There are 169 people on this ship. You, Rimmer, are only one man. Why can't you two get on?
:'''Lister''': You see, I try, sir. I'm not an insubordinate man by nature. I try and respect Rimmer and everything, but it's not easy, 'cos he's such a smeghead!
:'''Rimmer''': Did you hear that, sir? Lister, do you have any conception of the penalty for describing a superior technician as a smeghead?
:'''Todhunter''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, Rimmer... You ''are'' a smeghead!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Captain Hollister''': Just one more thing before we start the disco. Holly tells me he's sensed a non-human life form on-board.
:'''Lister''': Sir, it's Rimmer!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': You wanted to see me, Captain?
:'''Captain Hollister''': Where's the cat?
:'''Lister''': What? What cat?
:'''Captain Hollister''': Lister, not only are you so stupid you jeopardise every man and woman on this ship, not only that, you take a photo of yourself ''with'' the cat and send it to be processed in the ship's lab. Now, I'm going to ask you again. Do you have a cat?
:'''Lister''': No.
:'''Captain Hollister''': ''[holding up a photo of Lister and a cat]'' ''Have you got a cat?''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Where is everybody, Hol'?
:'''Holly''': They're dead, Dave.
:'''Lister''': Who is?
:'''Holly''': Everybody, Dave.
:'''Lister''': What, Captain Hollister?
:'''Holly''': Everybody's dead, Dave.
:'''Lister''': What, Todhunter?
:'''Holly''': Everybody's dead, Dave.
:'''Lister''': What, Selby?
:'''Holly''': They're all dead. Everybody's dead, Dave.
:'''Lister''': Petersen isn't, is he?
:'''Holly''': Everybody's dead, Dave!
:'''Lister''': Not Chen!
:'''Holly''': Gordon Bennett! Yes, Chen. Everyone. Everybody's dead, Dave!
:'''Lister''': Rimmer?
:'''Holly''': He's dead, Dave. Everybody is dead. Everybody is dead, Dave.
:'''Lister''': Wait. Are you trying to tell me everybody's dead?
:'''Holly''': Wish I never let him out in the first place....

=== ''Future Echoes'' ===
:'''Holly''': I am Holly, the ship's computer, with an IQ of 6000; the same IQ as 6000 PE teachers.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': Look, I'm trying to navigate at faster than the speed of light, which means that before you see something, you've already passed through it. Even with an IQ of 6000, it's still brown trousers time.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[jogging in place]'' Morning, Lister! How's life in hippie heaven, you pregnant, baboon-bellied, space beatnik? What's the plan for the day, then? Slobbing in the morning, followed by slobbing in the afternoon, then a bit of a snooze before the main evening's slob? God, you're a disgrace to the species. ''[Jogs away]''
:'''Lister''': Good morning, Rimmer.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': You said yourself. I can't stop it. Let's get this over with. ''[Grabs a pipe]''
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, what's that for?
:'''Lister''': I'm going out as I came in, screaming and kicking.
:'''Rimmer''': You can't just whack Death on the head!
:'''Lister''': If he comes near me, I'm gonna rip his nipples off!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[about his haircut]'' It may be a bit severe, a bit too Green Beret, but you are how you look, and I look... ''[finally seeing his enormous beehive hairdo in the mirror]'' like a complete and total tit!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Yo, look, Rimmer, I've been thinking.
:'''Rimmer''': What?
:'''Lister''': You know, about going into stasis and everything.
:'''Rimmer''': How did I do what?
:'''Lister''': What do you mean, &quot;how did I do what&quot;?
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, don't be a gimboid!
:'''Lister''': I'm not being a gimboid!
:'''Rimmer''': ''[turning away from Lister]'' I've just been in the library thinking, and I've decided... ''[pauses and looks annoyed]'' SHUT UP! Now, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I've decided that, when you go into stasis, I want to stay behind. I want to be left on.
:'''Lister''': What, on your own for the rest of your life?
:'''Rimmer''': What things?
:'''Lister''': Eh?
:'''Rimmer''': I said ''what''?
:'''Lister''': What's going on?
:'''Rimmer''': ''[points into thin air and starts walking away from Lister]'' You are space crazy!
:'''Lister''': ''I'm'' space crazy? You're the one who's space crazy!
:'''Rimmer''': Well, it probably is deja vu, it sounds like it.
:''[Rimmer shakes his head and walks out of the drive room. As he does so, another Rimmer enters from the captain's office, startling Lister]''
:'''Lister''': AAAH! Rimmer! I've just seen you walk out of that door!
:'''Rimmer''': What?
:'''Lister''': How did you do that?
:'''Rimmer''': How did I do what?
:'''Lister''': You just this second walked out of that door!
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, don't be a gimboid!
:'''Lister''': I swear on my grandmother's life that as you walked out of that door... ''[runs across the room, causing Rimmer to turn to face him]'' you came in this one!
:'''Rimmer''': I've just been in the library thinking, and I've decided...
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, I'm telling you!
:'''Rimmer''': Hold it. Now, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I've decided that, when you go into stasis, I want to stay behind. I want to be left on.
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, you've just come in and said exactly these things.
:'''Rimmer''': What things?
:'''Lister''': You said that.
:'''Rimmer''': I said ''what''?
:'''Lister''': And that! You said that!
:'''Rimmer''': You are space crazy!
:'''Lister''': And then you said, &quot;well, it probably is deja vu&quot;.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, it probably is deja vu, it sounds like it.
:'''Lister''': Well, go on, then, shake your head and walk out.
:''[Rimmer shakes his head and walks out]''

=== ''Balance of Power'' ===
:'''Lister''': Holly, why Rimmer's hologram? Why'd you have to bring Rimmer's hologram back? He was the most unpopular man on board this ship. I mean, he even had to organise his own surprise birthday parties!
:'''Holly''': Who should I have brought back, then?
:'''Lister''': Anyone! Chen, Petersen! I mean even [[w:Hermann Göring|Hermann Göring]] would've been more of a laugh than Rimmer! I mean, OK, he was a drug-crazed, [[w:Nazism|Nazi]] [[w:cross-dressing|transvestite]], but at least we could've gone dancing!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': [[w:Jean-Paul Sartre|Jean-Paul Sartre]] said Hell was being locked forever in a room with your friends.
:'''Lister''': Holly, all his mates were French!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': What's this? Learning drugs? They're illegal, matey! I'm afraid you're in very serious, grave, deep trouble, Lister. Where did you get them? I want names, I want places, I want dates.
:'''Lister''': Arnold Rimmer, his locker, this morning.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': We're mates! We're pals!
:'''Lister''': When?
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, come on, Lister! Laugh, laugh, laugh. Chuckle, guffaw, giggle. That's Rimsy and Listy!
:'''Lister''': When?
:'''Rimmer''': Millions of times.
:'''Lister''': ''When?''
:'''Rimmer''': Ah... no... ah, how about the time your safety harness snapped and you fell into the cargo bay? We laughed then, didn't we?
:'''Lister''': I cracked me spine in three places.
:'''Rimmer''': Yes, but it was hilarious! We laughed like drains!
:'''Lister''': ''You'' laughed, I spent six weeks in traction.
:'''Rimmer''': And you spent the rest of the summer walking around like a croquet hoop! I laughed so hard I nearly puked...

=== ''Waiting For God'' ===
:'''Holly''': David Lister, Technician, 3rd class. Captain's remarks: &quot;Has requested sick leave due to diarrhea on no less than 500 occasions. Left his previous job as a supermarket trolley attendant after ten years, because he didn't want to get tied down to a career. Promotion prospects: zero.&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': Arnold Rimmer, Technician, 2nd Class. Captain's remarks: &quot;There's a saying amongst the officers: 'If a job's worth doing, it's worth doing well. If it's not worth doing, give it to Rimmer.' He aches for responsibility, yet constantly fails the astro-navigation exam. Astoundingly zealous, possibly mad; probably has more teeth than brain cells. Promotion prospects: comical.&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I always hated that pus-head Hollister. He always resented my popularity. That's why he never put forward my proposal to reduce the minimum haircut length by an eighth of an inch. Small-minded, petty-thinking modo!
:'''Holly''': Arnold, I'm picking up an unidentified object.
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Constantly fails the exam&quot;? I'd hardly call eleven times &quot;constantly&quot;! I mean, if you eat roast beef eleven times in your life, one would hardly say that person &quot;constantly&quot; eats roast beef. No, it would be a rare, nay, freak occurrence! &quot;Possibly mad&quot;?! What is he driveling about?!
:'''Holly''': It's on the screen, Arnold.
:'''Rimmer''': What is?
:'''Holly''': The UO.
:'''Rimmer''': What is it?
:'''Holly''': I don't know.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, you'd better find out, hadn't you? It's obviously beyond me; I've got more teeth than brain cells, remember?!
:'''Holly''': Yes, you have.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[examining markings on the space pod]'' Hold on... Give me an R... Give me an E... Give me a D.... Give me a Red Dwarf...Garbage Pod! Holly, did Rimmer ever work in waste disposal?
:'''Holly''': No, Dave.
:'''Lister''': It's one of our old Red Dwarf garbage pods with the writing burnt off in places. Why didn't you tell him, Hol?
:'''Holly''': Well, it's a laugh, innit?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': I mean, what kind of holy writ is this, Rimmer? 'It is a sin to be cool.'
:'''Rimmer''': LOOK, I'M SICK TO DEATH OF HEARING ABOUT THESE STUPID CATS! MY CONCERNS ARE SLIGHTLY MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT KIND OF STUPID, SMEGGING CARDBOARD HAT I'M WEARING! I'M TRYING TO DECIPHER ''THIS!'' THIS IS SCIENCE, LADDIE! You can smirk, Lister, but I believe the Quagaars!
:'''Lister''': &quot;Quagars&quot;?
:'''Rimmer''': Quagaars, it's a name I made up! Double-A, actually! I believe the Quagaars'll have the technology to give me a new body!
:'''Lister''': Never mind this tot, where's the Cat?
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Tot&quot;?
:'''Lister''': Tot.
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Tot&quot;?!
:'''Lister''': Tot!
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;TOT&quot;?!
:'''Lister''': TOT!
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;TOT&quot;?! &quot;TOT&quot;?! WE'LL SEE HOW TOTTY THIS IS, LADDIE, THE QUARANTINE PERIOD'S NEARLY UP! ....''BASTARD!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
: ''[Credits roll but then stop]''
:'''Rimmer''': It's a garbage pod.
:''[Credits roll again, then stop again]''
:'''Rimmer''': IT'S A ''SMEGGING'' GARBAGE POD!!!

=== ''Confidence and Paranoia'' ===
:'''Cat''': Hey, this has been a really good day. I've eaten five times, I've slept six times, and I've made a lot of things mine. Tomorrow, I'm gonna see if I can't have sex with something! ''[Sings]'' S-E-X, you know I want it! S-E-X, I'm gonna get it! Yeah! ''[Cat finds Lister unconscious on the floor]'' S-E-X, I think I found it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Confidence''': Ding-dong! Another great idea from the people who brought you beer milkshakes!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister:''' Where's Paranoia?
:'''Confidence:''' I killed him, cha cha cha.
:'''Lister:''' What do you mean, &quot;I killed him, cha cha cha&quot;?!!

=== ''Me&amp;sup2;'' ===
:'''Lister''': Hang on, hang on. Are you saying you never became an officer because you shared your quarters with someone who hummed?
:'''Rimmer''': Obviously not just that, Lister. Everything! Everything you ever did was designed to hold me back and annoy me.
:'''Lister''': Like what?
:'''Rimmer''': Like using my mother's photograph as an ashtray.
:'''Lister''': I didn't know! I thought it was a souvenir from Titan Zoo.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Yo, I didn't know you had any medals. What are they for?
:'''Rimmer''': Three years long service. Six years long service. Nine years long service... Twelve years long service.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Swapping my toothpaste for a tube of contraceptive jelly.
:'''Lister''': C'mon, that was a joke!
:'''Rimmer''': Yes Lister, the same kind of joke as putting my name on the waiting list for experimental pile surgery.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': STOP YOUR FOUL WHINING, YOU FILTHY PIECE OF DISTENDED RECTUM!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': ''[through a megaphone while on roller skates]'' Hello, hello, testing, testing, one, one, one, me, me, me! Attention all lady cats! I am feeling very, very sexy! Can you hear me, lady cats? My body is available!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': ''[through his megaphone]'' Hello!
:'''Lister''': Will you stop doing that?
:'''Cat''': I'm trying to watch the film!
:'''Lister''': I'm only eatin'!
:'''Cat''': No, eating's when food goes in your mouth!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[revelling in having the room to himself]'' Ecstasy! We're talking mega ecstasy bliss! I can hum as loud as I like, as long as I like! I'm a free man... And you see those socks? See 'em? They're going right where they belong: all over the floor, where any self-respecting bachelor would keep 'em! I'm gonna have the bottom bunk, the big bunk! I'm gonna leave the top off the shampoo. I'm gonna squeeze the toothpaste right from the middle! In fact, I'm gonna do all the things that drove him bonkers! I'm gonna crack me knuckles, I'm gonna grind me teeth, I'm gonna live for a change! Hee-hee! ''[sniffs]''....Aw, smeggin' hell... ''[puts socks back in their basket]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[drunkenly telling the story behind his last words &quot;gazpacho soup&quot;]'' It was the greatest night of my life; I had been invited to the Captain's table. I had only been with the company FOURTEEN YEARS. Six officers and me... they called me &quot;Arnold!&quot; We had gazpacho soup for starters... I didn't know that gazpacho soup was meant to be served cold. I called over the chef and told him to take it away and bring it back hot! So he did... the looks on their faces still haunt me today! I thought they were laughing at the chef, when all the time they were laughing at me as I ate my piping hot gazpacho soup! I never ate at the Captain's table again. That was the end of my career. If only they'd mentioned it in basic training! Instead of having us climbing up and down ropes and crawling on your elbows through tunnels--if only just ONCE they would've mentioned that gazpacho soup was served cold--I would've been an admiral by now!...instead of a nothing, which is what I am, let's face it... I never got off the bottom rung, and do you know why? It's because I didn't have the right nobby parents! I'll bet Todhunter was fed gazpacho soup as soon as he was on solids! No, I'll bet he was breast-fed on it! One side gazpacho soup, the other side freely-dispensed chilled champagne!''

== Red Dwarf: Series II (1988)==

=== ''Kryten'' ===
:'''Holly''': We're getting a signal. It's probably nothing but I just thought I'd mention it.
:'''Rimmer''': Aliens.
:'''Lister''': Oh God, aliens... Your explanation for anything slightly peculiar is aliens, isn't it? You lose your keys - it's aliens. A picture falls off the wall - it's aliens. That time we used up a whole bog roll in a day, you thought that was aliens as well!
:'''Rimmer''': Well, ''we'' didn't use it all, Lister. Who did?
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, aliens used our bog roll?
:'''Rimmer''': Just 'cos they're aliens, doesn't mean they don't have to visit the little boys' room. Although they probably do something weird and alien-esque, like it comes out of the top of their heads or something.
:'''Lister''': Well, I wouldn't like to be stuck behind one in a cinema!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': Hope they've got a few odds and sods on board. We're a bit short on a few supplies.
:'''Lister''': Like what?
:'''Holly''': Cow's milk. Ran out of that yonks ago. Fresh ''and'' dehydrated.
:'''Lister''': What kind of milk are we using now?
:'''Holly''': Emergency back-up supply. We're on the dog's milk.
:'''Lister''': ''[looks at his cup in horror]'' Dog's milk?!
:'''Holly''': Nothing wrong with dog's milk. Full of goodness, full of vitamins, full of marrowbone jelly. Lasts longer than any other type of milk, dog's milk.
:'''Lister''': Why?
:'''Holly''': No bugger'll drink it. Plus, of course, the advantage of dog's milk is that when it goes off, it tastes exactly the same as when it's fresh.
:'''Lister''': Why didn't you tell me, Holly?
:'''Holly''': What, and spoil your tea?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(Kryten enters the room ahead of the rest)''
:'''Kryten''': ''(Speaking to the skeletal crew)'' Well, here they are.
:'''Rimmer''': ''(Enters and bows)'' Carmita...''(Sees the skeletons and stays in his bow, jaw agape)''
''(Lister and the Cat enter and stare at the skeletons)''
:'''Lister''': Well...it's a bit difficult to know what to say. Isn't it, Ace?
:'''Kryten''': Well, isn't anybody going to say, &quot;Hello?&quot;
:'''Lister''': ''(To Rimmer)'' I think the blonde one's giving you the eye.
:'''Kryten''': Well, I'll leave you to get acquainted. I'll just go and fix some tea. ''(Exits)''
:'''Cat''': ''(To the skeleton of Tracy)'' Hi, baby!
:'''Rimmer''': I don't believe this.
:'''Lister''': Be strong, Big Man!
:'''Rimmer''': Our first contact with intelligent life in three million and two years and it's the android version of Norman Bates.
:'''Cat''': Come on, guys. So they're a little on the skinny side.
:'''Lister''': Listen, girls. I don't know whether this is the time or place to say this but my mate, Ace, here is incredibly, 'credibly brave!
:'''Rimmer''': Smeg off, dog food face!
:'''Lister''': And he's got just tons and tons of girlfriends!
:'''Rimmer''': I'm warning you, Lister!
''(Kryten returns with tea and cups on a serving platter)''
:'''Kryten''': ''(Noticing the silence)'' Well, is anything the matter?
:'''Rimmer''': Anything the matter? They're dead.
:'''Kryten''': Who's dead?
:'''Rimmer''': ''(Pointing to the skeletons) They'' are dead. They're all dead.
:'''Kryten''': My God! Well, I was only away two minutes!
:'''Rimmer''': They've been dead for centuries!
:'''Kryten''': No!
:'''Rimmer''': Yes!
:'''Kryten''': Are you a doctor?
:'''Rimmer''': You've only got to look at them. They've got less meat on them than a Chicken McNugget! ''[The &quot;Mc&quot; is edited out of all American broadcasts]''
:'''Kryten''': Well, what am I going to do? I'm, I'm, I'm programmed to serve them.
:'''Lister''': I think the first thing we should do is bury them.
:'''Kryten''': You're that sure they're dead?
:'''Rimmer''': ''(Exasperated)'' Yes!
:'''Kryten''': ''(Indicating the skeleton of Anne)'' What about this one?
:'''Rimmer''': There's a simple test. ''(To the skeletons)'' All right, girls, hands up, those of you who are alive.
''(Kryten gestures desperately to the skeletons, who of course don't respond)''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lister finds Kryten ironing in the sleeping quarters, now decorated like something from Pride &amp; Prejudice]''
:'''Lister''': What the smeggin' hell is going on?
:'''Kryten''': Good afternoon, Mister David, sir.
:'''Lister''': ''[holds up a pair of boxer shorts]'' What are these?
:'''Kryten''': Your boxer shorts, Mister David, sir.
:'''Lister''': No way are these my boxer shorts, these bend! What have you done to the place?
:'''Kryten''': I've done a spot of tidying up.
:'''Lister''': But where is everything? Where's me coffee cup with the mould in it?
:'''Kryten''': I threw it away, sir.
:'''Lister''': But I was breeding that mould! His name was Albert! I was trying to get him two foot high!
:'''Kryten''': Why, sir?
:'''Lister''': ''Because it drives Rimmer nuts!'' And driving Rimmer nuts is what keeps me going.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': You'd never get a cat to be a servant. You ever see a cat return a stick? &quot;Hey, man! You threw the stick, you go get it yourself! I'm busy! If you wanted the stick so bad, why'd you throw it away in the first place?&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': 'Mr Arnold' isn't his name. His name's 'Rimmer', or 'smeghead', or 'dinosaur-breath', or 'molecule-mind', or on rare occasions when you wanna be really mega-polite to him, and we're talking mega polite here, on those exceptional circumstances you can call him 'arsehole'.

=== ''Better Than Life'' ===
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, real dumplings, proper dumplings when they are properly cooked to perfection, proper dumplings should not ''bounce''!
:'''Rimmer''': True, but after the way I thought they were going to turn out they were quite ''[does a little kiss]'' ''superb!'' ''[French accent]''
:'''Lister''': So how's the Cat?
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, he's just sleeping off the stomach pump... He'll be alright. The lamb was a bit of a flop though.
:'''Lister''': The &quot;lamb&quot;!? Everyone thought the lamb was the cheese! And that lemon meringue pie, man, what was in that?
:'''Rimmer''': I thought you liked that! You brought some back.
:'''Lister''': Yeah, I wanted to try some out on my athlete's foot!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I'm just trying to rehabilitate myself, trying to do the everyday, normal things that most living people take for granted.
:'''Lister''': You've got the skutters to help you.
:'''Rimmer''': What? Pinky and smeggy Perky? What use are they? It's like giving Blind Pew contact lenses.
:'''Lister''': They only do what you tell them to.
:'''Rimmer''': Ah, but they don't, do they? You say, &quot;Keep an eye on that lamb&quot;, and they do - they sit there for three hours and watch it burn!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': I'm so hungry. I just have to eat!
:'''Lister''': Rimmer's dad's died.
:'''Cat''': I'd prefer chicken.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[while Lister is sorting through the mail]'' You'll send away for every bit of tat, just so you'll have some mail to open.
:'''Lister''': Me... Me... Me...
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Please rush me my portable walrus polishing kit! Four super brushes for cleaning even the trickiest of sea-bound mammals! Yes, I am over 18, although my IQ isn't.&quot;
:'''Lister''': Smeg! Outland Revenue!
:'''Rimmer''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, oh, oh, oh! Outland Revenue!
:'''Lister''': 8500!
:'''Rimmer''': 8500? That's a lot of tax, isn't it, Listy? How on Titan are you going to pay for that?
:'''Lister''': I'm not. It's yours.
:'''Rimmer''': What? This is wrong! This is dead wrong!
:'''Lister''': Relax, it doesn't matter now. Not gonna catch you now, are they?
:'''Rimmer''': What? Just because we're three million years into deep space and the human species is extinct? That means nothing to these people. They'll find us.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[returning to mail sorting]'' Another one for you. &quot;Rear Admiral Lieutenant General Rimmer&quot;.
:'''Rimmer''': That's from my mother.
:'''Lister''': &quot;Rear Admiral&quot;?
:'''Rimmer''': Every time I take an exam, I tell her I passed. It's getting embarrassing now. I should be Commander in Chief of the whole universe.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': I remember when my dad died, you know. I was only six. I got loads of presents off everyone, like it was Christmas. I remember wishing a couple more people would die so I could complete my Lego set. My grandma tried to explain, you know. She said he'd gone away and he wasn't coming back. So, I wanted to know where, like, you know. She said he was very happy and he'd gone to the same place as my goldfish. So I thought they'd flushed him down the bog. I thought he was just round the U-bend, you know. I used to stuff food down, you know, and magazines and that for him to read. They took me to a child psychologist in the end, because they found me with my head down the bowl, reading him the football results.

=== ''Thanks for the Memory'' ===
:'''Lister''': And for this ''very'' special occasion I have baked - a cake.
''(Lister uncovers the cake. It is covered in icing, with a candle in the middle)''
:'''Holly''': What's that then?
:'''Lister''': It's in the shape of a spanner, Holly, cos he was a technician.
:'''Holly''': Well, that's very apt, that is. If he'd been a postman you'd have baked it in the shape of an envelope, I suppose?
:'''Lister''': Yeah!
:'''Holly''': Gordon Bennett, it's lucky he's not a gynaecologist.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': What time is it?
:'''Rimmer''': ''(blearily crawls over to the clock on the bedside table)'' Saturday.
:'''Lister''': That the best you can do?
:'''Rimmer''': There are some numbers next to it, but they could be anything.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I want a triple fried egg sandwich with...
:'''Lister''': With chili sauce and chutney!
:'''Holly''': You what?
:'''Lister''': It's a state-of-the-art [[wikt:sarnie|sarnie]]!
:'''Holly''': The state of the ''floor'' I'm worried about...
&lt;hr width=50% /&gt;
''(Rimmer takes a bite and a succession of expressions are seen on his face. He ends up at something like a mixture of pain, horror and shock. He may be drunk but he's still got pain receptors)''
:'''Rimmer''': I feel like I'm having a baby!
:'''Lister''': It's good, innit?
:'''Rimmer''': It's incredible! Where did you get the recipe from?
:'''Lister''': I can't remember...I think it was a book on bacteriological warfare.
:'''Rimmer''': It's like a cross between food and bowel surgery.
:'''Lister''': It's well naughty. The trouble is, you've gotta eat it before the bread dissolves.
&lt;hr width=50% /&gt;
:''[The crew are puzzled by the apparently missing days on board the ship, the fact that Lister's jigsaw has been completed, and both he and the cat have a broken foot/leg. Rimmer suspects aliens.]''
:'''Lister''': So, aliens came on board.
:'''Rimmer''': without question!
:'''Lister''': They broke my leg.
:'''Rimmer''': For some reason.
:'''Cat''': They broke my leg.
:'''Rimmer''': Yes.
:'''Holly''': And then they did a jigsaw...well that's cleared that up...
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': OK, professor, what does it mean?
:'''Rimmer''': Right, breaking your leg 'hurts like hell'. HELL, okay? They do it beLOw the knee, LO; 'HEL-LO', get it? They do it twice, twice; 'TWO'. HELLO TO. And jigsaw must mean YOU. HELLO TO YOU!
:'''Cat''': ...I'd hate to be around when one of these suckers is making a speech!
&lt;hr width=50% /&gt;
:''[the crew search for the Black Box to try and piece together what happened]''
:'''Lister''': This is hopeless, it's like trying to find a fart in a Jacuzzi.

=== ''Stasis Leak'' ===

:'''Rimmer''': I loved that little lemming. I built him a little wall he could hurl himself off of.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Now kindly cluck off before I extract your giblets and shove a large seasoned onion between the lips you never kiss with.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Wow! I've never been this close to women before. It makes me want to do something. But I don't know what it is. Whatever it is, I want to do a lot of it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''' ''[to Rimmer]'': What is it?
:'''Rimmer''': It's a rend in the space-time continuum.
:'''Cat''' ''[to Lister]'': What is it?
:'''Lister''': The stasis room freezes time, you know, makes time stand still. So whenever you have a leak, it must preserve whatever it's leaked into, and it's leaked into this room.
:'''Cat''' ''[to Rimmer]'': What is it?
:'''Rimmer''': It's singularity, a point in the universe where the normal laws of space and time don't apply.
:'''Cat''' ''[to Lister]'': What is it?
:'''Lister''': It's a hole back into the past.
:'''Cat''': Oh, a magic door! Well, why didn't you say?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Captain Hollister''': Rimmer, make this quick.
:'''Rimmer''': Sir, I wish to place on record that third technician Lister, David-
:'''Captain Hollister''': Quicker than that, Rimmer.
:'''Rimmer''': -smuggled aboard the mining vessel Red Dwarf a consignment of a hallucinogenic fungi Titan Mushrooms, more popularly known to the Space Beatnik community as &quot;Freaky Fungus&quot;.
:'''Captain Hollister''': Is this true?
:'''Lister''': Erm, sort of.
:'''Rimmer''': On the morning of February the 26th, at 0800 hrs, did engage in conversation with second technician Rimmer, Arnold J...
:'''Captain Hollister''': For crying out loud, Rimmer!
:'''Rimmer''': - the outcome of which was a proposal by the aforementioned Lister to the aforementioned Rimmer to cook him breakfast.
:'''Captain Hollister''': Okay, I'm getting the picture.
:'''Rimmer''': Breakfast comprised of two eggs, three rashers of bacon, a grilled tomato, two sausages, a small portion of fried potatoes... and a large quantity of ''mushrooms''. Having consumed this repast, second technician Rimmer, Arnold J. experienced what can only be described as a ''&quot;voyage to trip-out city&quot;''. To wit, a major hallucinogenic fit.
:'''Captain Hollister''': Lister, is this true?
:'''Lister''': No, sir. I'm sure it was only one egg.
:'''Rimmer''': The aforementioned Rimmer, to wit, me, then attended inspection parade. He was totally naked except for a pair of mock-leather driving gloves and some blue swimming goggles. Under the influence of this psychedelic breakfast he went on to attack two senior officers, believing them to be giraffes who were armed and dangerous.
:'''Captain Hollister''': You'd better have a good reason for this, Lister.
:'''Lister''': I have, sir.
:'''Captain Hollister''': Why'd you do it?
:'''Lister''': I thought it'd be a laugh.
:'''Captain Hollister''': Right. Two weeks PD, Lister. Dismissed.
:'''Rimmer''': With respect, sir, the penalty for a crime of this nature is fifteen years imprisonment.
:'''Lister''': Thanks a lot(!)
:'''Captain Hollister''': Rimmer, I said dismissed.
:'''Rimmer''': Two weeks?
:'''Captain Hollister''': That's enough.
:'''Rimmer''': Two smegging weeks?
:'''Captain Hollister''': I ''said,'' that’s enough!
:'''Rimmer''': ''[salutes]'' With respect, sir, you've got your head right up your big fat arse!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Listen, man, I'm sorry about those mushrooms, you know. I mean, I didn't know... I'm not totally reckless and irresponsible, for God's sake. I mean, when it comes down to it, I'm a pretty straight and honest geezer.
:'''Rimmer''': Where did you get them?
:'''Lister''': I nicked them. They were in a locker. They must have belonged to Headbanger Harris.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Good book?
:'''Lister''': Yeah, it's alright.
:'''Rimmer''': I didn't think you read.
:'''Lister''': Don't much, but this is good.
:'''Rimmer''': What is it?
:'''Lister''': It's your diary.
:'''Rimmer''': WHAT!?
:'''Lister''': I didn't know you sent secret love letters to Carol McCauley.
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, that is my private, personal, private diary; full of my personal, private, personal things.
:'''Cat''': It's gone public.
:'''Rimmer''': I don't believe it! You've been reading it to the Cat?
:'''Cat''': Only the best bits!
:'''Lister''': ''[reading]'' &quot;Carol McCauley, your eyes are like two limpid pools in the mornings&quot;.
:'''Rimmer''': Stop it.
:'''Lister''': &quot;Your hair is like a golden waterfall&quot;.
:'''Rimmer''': Oh man!
:'''Lister''': &quot;Plus, those short skirts you wear make me really horny&quot;?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Look... In three million years, you'll be dead.
:'''Past Rimmer''': ''[mock surprise]'': Oh, will I really?
:'''Rimmer''': Yes, unless you do something about it now.
:'''Past Rimmer''': Oh, and what do you suggest I do, then? Eat less white bread? More roughage?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Suitcase''': Excuse me. No, no. Down here. Have you seen a man who's lost his luggage, about 5 foot 10, mousy hair?
:'''Cat''': No I haven't!
:'''Suitcase''': Oh, no. I bet they've sent him to the wrong bloody airport again!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Why do women always leave me for total smegheads? Why do they dump me for men who wear turtle neck sweaters and smoke a pipe? I mean natural yoghurt-eaters. &quot;Reliable&quot;, &quot;sensible&quot;, &quot;dependable&quot;, and lots of others words that end in &quot;-ible&quot;. They're obsessed with house prices and spends half his life at antique fairs looking for bargains and drinking wine. It's never beer is it, it's always wine. 'What do you want on your cornflakes darling', 'oh I'll 'ave some wine please'. SMEG!
:'''Cat''': You can tell all that just from a photograph?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': I was in love once. A Sinclair ZX81. People said, no, Holly, she's not for you. She's cheap, she's stupid and she wouldn't load, well, not for me anyway.
:'''Lister''': What are you trying to say, Hol?
:'''Holly''': What I'm saying, Dave is, it's better to have loved and lost than to listen to an album by Olivia Newton-John.
:'''Cat''': Why's that?
:'''Holly''': Anything's better than to listen to an album by Olivia Newton-John.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Past Rimmer''': (last lines) Please! Before ''anyone'' says ''anything'' else... I'd like to make a speech. (shouting) '''''GO AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!'''''

=== ''Queeg'' ===
:''[After an incident in the hologram control room, Rimmer appears to have no legs]''
:'''Holly''': Probably not serious, don't panic.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, if it's not serious when your genitals can wander off on their own, I'd like to know what is!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': ''[after being insulted about his temporarily reduced IQ'']: 6? Do me a lemon! That's a poor IQ for a glass of water!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': That's a load of Tottenham, that is. Yeah, a steaming pile of Hotspur.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': He's out to lunch, breakfast, dinner, tea, supper, the lot. He's not in for a single meal, if you ask me.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Holly has challenged the man to a game of chess for control of Red Dwarf]''
:'''Holly''': Queen to rook eight, checkmate.
:'''Queeg''': That's an illegal move.
:'''Holly''': Oh, yea. Queens don't move like that. I was thinking of poker.
:''(Rimmer groans inwardly)''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Queeg''': Bishop to knight five, double check and mate, sucker!
:'''Holly''': Oh yea, didn't see that.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Look at my hands, I had lovely hands!
:'''Lister''': Well, wear the smeggin' gloves!
:'''Cat''': Marigolds with blue? Are you crazy!?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': We are talking jape of the decade. We are talking April, May, June, July &amp; August fool. Yes, that's right... I am Queeg.
:'''Rimmer, Lister &amp; Cat:''' WHAT??!!
:'''Holly:''' Queeg never existed, it was me all along.
:'''Rimmer, Lister &amp; Cat:''' WHAT??!!
:'''Holly:''' Wheeze of the week, mate!
:'''Rimmer, Lister &amp; Cat:''' WHAT??!!
:'''Holly:''' &quot;Going around in circles for 14 months.&quot; &quot;Getting all my information from ''The Junior Colour Encyclopedia of Space''.&quot; The respect you have for me is awesome, innit?
:'''Lister:''' Are you tellin' me you staged the whole thing??
:'''Holly:''' (''in Queeg's voice'') That's right, suckers! (''in his normal voice'') And the moral of the story is... appreciate what you've got, because basically, I'm fantastic!

=== ''Parallel Universe'' ===
:''[from the song &quot;Tongue-Tied,&quot; sung by '''Cat, Rimmer and Lister''']''
:When I saw you for the first time (first time)
:My knees began to quiver (quiver)
:And I got a funny feeling (feeling)
:In my kidneys and my liver (digestive system baby)
:My hands they started shakin' (shakin')
:My heart began a-thumpin' (boom, boom, boom)
:My breakfast left my body (huey, huey, huey)
:Now darling tell me somethin.'

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[trying to demonstrate his flirtation technique]'' Would you like to join me in a cocktail?
:'''Lister''': No.
:'''Rimmer''': You can't say no... it doesn't work if you say no, you've gotta say yes!
:'''Lister''': Right, okay, go on.
:'''Rimmer''': Would you like a worm-do?
:'''Lister''': What's that then?
:'''Rimmer''': What's what?
:'''Lister''': A worm-do.
:'''Rimmer''': What about it?
:'''Lister''': ...Is this still the opening line?
:'''Rimmer''': You're not giving me the right reply!
:'''Lister''': What ''is'' the right reply?!
:'''Rimmer''': I ask if you want to join me for a cocktail, you say yes; I ask if you want a worm-do, you say 'what's a [[worm]]-do?' and then I say-
:'''Lister''': 'Oh, it wriggles along the ground like that.'
:'''Rimmer''': You know it.
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, you could not pull a rotten tooth out of a dead horse's head with that one!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[holds up the Holly Hop Drive]'' Is this it?
:'''Holly''': What do you think?
:'''Lister''': It's just a box with &quot;stop&quot; and &quot;start&quot; on it!
:'''Holly''': It's fairly straightforward. If you want to start it you press &quot;start&quot;. I'll leave you to work out the rest of the controls for yourself.
:'''Rimmer''': It's absolutely pathetic.
:'''Holly''': Right. Let's Holly Hop. Engage drive... drive engaged. Initiating ignition sequence... ignition sequence initiated.
:'''Rimmer''': Get on with it.
:'''Holly''': It takes time, this. One slight error in any of my thirteen billion calculations and we'll be blasted to smithereens. Here we go, then: 10, 9, 8, 6, 5-
:'''Rimmer''': You missed out the seven.
:'''Holly''': Did I? I've always had a bit of a blind spot with sevens.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[sing-song voice]'' We're going to di-ie.
:'''Holly''': No problem. I'll start lower down. 1, blast off.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': I just don't know where we are. There's no two ways about it: I flamingoed up!
:'''Rimmer''': What do you mean?
:'''Holly''': It's like a cock-up, only much much bigger.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly:''' Hang on, I'm linking up with their on-board computer.
:'''Hilly:''' Hello, I'm Hilly.
:'''Holly:''' Hello, I'm Holly.
:'''Hilly:''' Hello Holly.
:'''Holly:''' Hello Hilly.
:'''Hilly:''' Wow, this is a turn up, innit. You'd better boogie on over and we can sort it out.
:'''Holly:''' Right on, sis.
:'''Hilly:''' See you, Hol.
:'''Holly:''' See you, Hil.
:''[The Crew stares at him]''
:'''Holly:''' I'm in there!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Hey, hey, hey, hey! I hate to break up the party, but is there somebody missing?
:'''Debs''': How d'you mean?
:'''Cat''': Well: Lister, female opposite; Rimmer, female opposite. Where's mine?
:'''Debs''': Oh, right. Mooching around on the Cargo Decks, I think.
:'''Cat''': Ohh! All my life I've waited for this moment, and now it has arrived! Hey, listen, if you hear me screaming, do not - I repeat, do not - come to the rescue! (whoops) ''[runs from the room, singing] I'm gonna get you, little kitty...''
:'''Debs''': I think he's in for a bit of a shock.
:'''Lister''': Why?
:'''Debs''': His opposite isn't female.
:'''Lister''': What is it?
:'''Debs''': It's a dog.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': ''[singing] I'm gonna get you, little kitty, I'm gonna get you...''
:''[He stops dead when he sees the Dog, looks straight at the camera]''
:'''Cat''': I don't know what that is, but I'm sure he wants to eat me.
:'''Dog''': Well, trash my shorts, what a funny-looking dawg!
:'''Cat''': ...better make myself look big! ''[raises his arms and snarls]''
:'''Dog''': Put it there, Buddy, put it right there!
:'''Cat''': ''[reels from his breath]'' Argh! What kind of toothpaste does he use?! Rotting meat flavour?
:'''Dog''': Oh, come on now. I wanna be your buddy! Tell you what - I'm gonna smell your behind, and you can smell mine! Now, is that a deal?
:'''Cat''': You wanna smell my ''WHAT!?''
:'''Dog''': Why sure! Don't you wanna smell me?
:'''Cat''': Man, I could smell you if you was on Mars! When was the last time you took a bath?
:'''Dog''': Oh please, don't say that word!
:'''Cat''': What, bath?
:'''Dog''': You said it again! Now listen up: if y'all gonna say that word in front of me, please spell it.
:'''Cat''': When was the last time you took a B - A - T - H.
:''[beat; Dog thinks about it]''
:'''Dog''': What's that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': What colour is it supposed to turn?
:'''Lister''': Blue for not pregnant, which is the colour it's gonna turn.
:'''Rimmer''': And red for pregnant?
:'''Lister''': Yeah.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[chants]''Come on, you re-eds!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': It's changing colour!
:'''Lister''': What colour?
:'''Rimmer''': It is! It's changing colour!
:'''Lister''': ''What colour!?''
:'''Rimmer''': It's blue for not pregnant, right?
:'''Lister''': Yes!
:'''Rimmer''': Good news Listy, excellent news!
:'''Lister''': Oh, thank god!
:'''Rimmer''': I'm going to be an uncle!

== Red Dwarf: Series III (1989) ==
=== ''Backwards'' ===
:'''Lister''': Cat.
:'''Cat''': Mm?
:'''Lister''': You ever see the Flintstones?
:'''Cat''': Sure.
:'''Lister''': Do you think Wilma's sexy?
:'''Cat''': Wilma Flintstone?
:'''Lister''': Maybe we've been alone in deep space too long, but every time I see that show, her body drives me crazy. Is it me?
:'''Cat''': I think in all probability, Wilma Flintstone is the most desirable woman who ever lived.
:'''Lister''': That's good, I thought I was goin' strange.
:'''Cat''': She's incredible!
:'''Lister''': What do you think of Betty?
:'''Cat''': Betty Rubble? Well, I would go with Betty...but I'd be thinkin' of Wilma.
:'''Lister''': This is crazy. Why are we talking about going to bed with Wilma Flintstone?
:'''Cat''': You're right. We're nuts. This is an ''insane'' conversation.
:'''Lister''': She'll never leave Fred, and we know it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': I think there's something wrong with the gearbox. The thing is, I learned to drive in Starbug 2. I'm not used to the controls in Starbug 1.
:'''Rimmer''': They're exactly the same.
:'''Kryten''': Yes. That's the problem.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Holly? Is it possible? Could this be Earth?
:'''Holly''': Certainly seems that way. Constellations match, gravity exactly one-G.
:'''Rimmer''': What's the time period?
:'''Holly''': Well, it's difficult to pin it down exactly, but according to all the available data, I would estimate it's round about... lunchtime, maybe half-one.
:'''Rimmer''': What period in ''history,'' dingleberry-breath? I mean can we expect to see Ghengis Khan and his barbarian buddies sweeping across the hill? Or a herd of flesh-eating dinosaurs feeding off the bones of Doug McClure? What is the year?
:'''Holly''': Well, I'd need some more data before I could give you a precise answer.
:'''Rimmer''': Like?
:'''Holly''': Well, this year's calendar'd be 'andy!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': We ain't gonna find 'em. They're gone, buddy. But look on the bright side — ''they're gone, buddy!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Is that what I think it is?
:'''Lister''': What do you think it is?
:'''Cat''': An orange whirly thing in space!
:'''Lister''': It's a time hole. That's where they are. We're going in.
:'''Cat''': Are you crazy We can't go in there!
:'''Lister''': Why not?
:'''Cat''': Orange, with ''this'' suit?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[in response to a woman speaking to him backwards]'' Flob-a-dob blib blob bleeb!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[on not everything being right in the backwards universe]'' What about St. Francis of Assisi? In this universe, he's the petty-minded little sadist who goes around maiming small animals! Or Santa Claus? What a bastard!
:'''Rimmer''': Eh?
:'''Lister''': He's the big fat git who sneaks down chimneys and steals all the kids' favourite toys!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The hidden message in the club owner's rant]''
:'''Club owner''': You are a stupid square-headed bald git, aren't you, eh?! I'm not pointing at you, I'm pointing at ''you''. But I'm not actually ''addressing'' you, I'm addressing the one prat in the country who's bothered to get hold of this recording, turn it round and work out the rubbish that I'm saying! What a poor, sad life he's got! Frankly, your act's crap anyway, anybody could have done it! I hate the lot of you, bollocks to you!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': You know, it could have worked. It really could. Where's the Cat?
:'''Lister''': He won't be long. He's...you know...in the bushes.
''(Lister and Rimmer wait for a bit. Suddenly they both realise something awful and look at each other...)''
:'''Lister''': We've got to stop him!
''(Too late. Cat's head pops up from behind some tall grass. He has a horrified look on his face, and his hair is sticking straight up. He walks out from the bushes and up the stairs with a very odd, stiff-legged gait. He stops in front of Rimmer and Lister)''
:'''Cat''': DON'T ASK!

=== ''Marooned'' ===
:'''Holly''': Abandon ship! Abandon ship! Black hole approaching! This is not a drill. ''This'' is a drill! ''[pneumatic drill sound]'' Abandon shi- Oh God, now the siren's bust.... Awooga! Awooga! Abandon ship!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': Well, the thing about a black hole - its main distinguishing feature - is it's black. And the thing about space, the colour of space, your basic space colour, is black. So how are you supposed to see them?
:'''Rimmer''': But five of them? . How can you manage to miss five black holes?
:'''Holly''': It's always the way, innit? You hang around for three million years in deep space and there hasn't been one, then all of a sudden five turn up at once.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[While Lister is examining his 19th century toy soldiers]'' Please be careful with those, they're antiques! How's General Dumuoriez going to look with goat vindaloo all over his tunic?
:'''Lister''': It'll make him look more realistic, people'll think he's got dysentery.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': He told me that in a previous incarnation I was [[Alexander the Great]]'s chief [[w:Eunuch|eunuch]].
:'''Lister''': You know what? I believe you.
:'''Rimmer''': To have lived a life alongside one of the greatest commanders of all time! No wonder the military's in my blood!
:'''Lister''': No wonder you're such a good singer!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Mayday, Mayday! I wonder why they call it &quot;Mayday&quot; ? It's only a bank holiday. Why not &quot;Shrove Tuesday&quot;, or &quot;Ascension Sunday&quot; ? Ascension Sunday, Ascension Sunday! 15th Wednesday after Pentecost, 15th Wednesday after Pentecost!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[on losing his virginity]'' Michelle Fisher. The eighth hole of Bootle Municipal Golf Course. Par 4, dogleg to the right, in the bunker behind the green.
:'''Rimmer''': You lost your virginity on a golf course? How'd you have the nerve?
:'''Lister''': It wasn't in the middle of the Ryder Cup or anythin'! It was midnight.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': She took all her clothes off and stood there in front of me, completely naked. I was so excited I nearly dropped me skateboard!
:'''Rimmer''': ''Skateboard?'' How old were you?
:'''Lister''': Twelve.
:'''Rimmer''': Twelve?! Twelve years old? ''Twelve?! (pause)'' You can't have been a full member of the golf club, then.
:'''Lister''': Of course I wasn't!
:'''Rimmer''': You did it on a golf course and you weren't a member?
:'''Lister''': 'Course I wasn't!
:'''Rimmer''': Didn't pay any green fees or anything?
:'''Lister''': It was just a place to go!
:'''Rimmer''': I used to play golf, I hate people who abuse the facilities! I hope you raked the sand back nicely after you'd finished. Imagine getting your ball stuck in Lister's buttock crevice. You'd need more than a niblick to get that out.
:'''Lister''': Are you saying I've got a big bum?
:'''Rimmer''': Big? It's like two badly parked Volkswagens.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': So Holly managed to navigate through five black holes?
:'''Holly''': As it 'appens, there weren't any black 'oles.
:'''Rimmer''': But you saw them!
:'''Holly''': They weren't black 'oles.
:'''Rimmer''' ''(resigned)'': What were they?
:'''Holly''': Grit. Five specs of grit on the scanner scope. Y'see the thing about grit, is it's black. And the thing about the scanner scope...
:'''Rimmer''': Ohhhh!

hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, get the hacksaw and follow me.
:'''Kryten''': Where are we going?
:'''Rimmer''': We're going to do to Lister what Alexander the Great once did to me.

===''Polymorph'' ===
:''[Rimmer walks in to find Kryten, vacuum attached to his groin, trying to remove 'polymorph' boxershorts from a writhing Lister.]
:'''Rimmer''': Well, i can't say i'm totally shocked. You'd bonk anything, wouldn't you, Lister?!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the boxershorts turn into a snake]
:'''Lister''': I HATE snakes, they freak me out TOTALLY, snakes. They are my all time second worst fear, guy.
:'''Rimmer''': What's your first?
:'''Lister''': ''[opens the bin to reveal an enormous salivating alien monster]'' This.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Well, I say let's get out there and twat it!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': What about the Space Corps Directive, which states, &quot;It is our primary overriding duty to contact other life-forms, exchange information and, whenever possible, bring them home&quot;?
:'''Rimmer''': What about the ''Rimmer'' Directive, which states &quot;Never tangle with anything that's got more teeth than the entire [[w:The Osmonds|Osmond family]]&quot;?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[fuming]'' Lister and mother. It's a ''dream come true''.
:'''Polymorph''': ''[disguised as Rimmer's mother]'' He's so energetic! I honestly thought my false teeth were going to fall out!
:'''Rimmer''': How lovely.
:'''Polymorph''': The positions he bent me into...!
:'''Rimmer''': Terrific. That sounds enchanting. Well done.
:'''Polymorph''': And the things this boy can do with Alphabetti Spaghetti...!
:'''Holly''': Cool it, Arnie!
:'''Rimmer''': ''ALPHABETTI SPAGHETTI''?!?! ''[the Polymorph drains his anger]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Erm, I think we're losing sight of the real issue here, which is: what are we gonna call ourselves? Erm, and I think it comes down to a choice between &quot;The League Against Salivating Monsters&quot; or my own personal preference, which is &quot;The Committee for the Liberation and Integration of Terrifying Organisms and their Rehabilitation Into Society.&quot; Erm, one drawback with that: the abbreviation is &quot;CLITORIS.&quot;
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': It needs killing! If that means I have to sacrifice my life in some stupid pointless way, then all the better!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Let's get tough. The time for talking is over. Call it extreme if you like, but I propose we hit it hard and hit it fast with a major -- and I mean major -- leaflet campaign, and while it's reeling from that, we'd follow up with a {whist} drive, a car boot sale, some street theatre and possibly even some benefit concerts. OK? Now, if that's not enough, I'm sorry, it's time for the T-shirts: &quot;Mutants Out&quot; ... &quot;Chameleonic Life Forms, No Thanks&quot; ... and if that's not enough, well, I don't know what will be.

=== ''Bodyswap'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': Have you ever been in dissection class held up a frog by its head? You know the way its belly sort of sticks out above its spindly little legs? Well, that's the picture I see when you get down from the bunk in the morning.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Cat and Lister are playing Scrabble.]''
:'''Cat''': Hey hey hey, I've got you now, buddy! J, O, Z, X, Y, Q, K!
:'''Lister''': That's not a word.
:'''Cat''': It's a Cat word.
:'''Lister''': Jozxyqk?
:'''Cat''': That's not how you pronounce it!
:'''Lister''': What does it mean?
:'''Cat''': It's the sound you make when you get your sexual organs trapped in something. Jozxyqk!!!
:'''Lister''': Is it in the dictionary?
:'''Cat''': Well it could be, if you're reading in the nude and close the book too quick. Jozxyqk!!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': When you're younger you can eat what you like, drink what you like, and still climb into your 26&quot; waist trousers and zip them closed. Then you reach that age, 24-25, your muscles give up, they wave a little white flag, and without any warning at all, you're suddenly a fat bastard.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister'''; Oh, 'ello. It's Captain Chloroform.

=== ''Timeslides'' ===
:'''[[w:Kryten|Kryten]]''': &quot;Pub.&quot; Ah, yes: a meeting place where people attempt to achieve advanced states of mental incompetence by the repeated consumption of fermented vegetable drinks.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': ''[reading Hitler's diary]'' Things to remember: Stop milk, pay papers, invade Czechoslovakia!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rimmer''' ''(on discovering he's no longer a hologram)'': Kryten! Unpack Rachel and get out the puncture repair kit!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[having jumped into a slide showing Hitler at Nuremburg]'' Ignore him, he's a complete and total nutter, and he's only got one testicle!
:'''Rimmer''': What is he doing? He's scuffling with Adolf Hitler. You can't just stick one on the leader of the Third Reich!
:'''Lister''': ''[comes back out]'' I nicked his briefcase!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Anything?
:'''Holly''': Got 'im.
:'''Rimmer''': And?
:'''Holly''': Tension Sheet, inventor of: Dave Lister, aged 17.
:'''Rimmer''': Damn!
:'''Holly''': And he died tragically in a plane crash, aged 98.
:'''Rimmer''': Ninety-eight?!
:'''Holly''': His own fault, apparently. He was making love to his fourteenth wife and he lost control of the plane.
:'''Rimmer''': Have you got any photographs?
:'''Holly''': ''(Shocked)'' Not of that, no!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Blaize Falconburger''': Like many people who appear to have everything, Dave's life has been tinged with tragedy. Well, actually it hasn't, but we can only hope. Now onto Dr Bob Porkmann, father of the condom that calls you back.
:'''Rimmer''': Freeze. I've seen enough.
:'''Holly''': What you gonna do?
:'''Rimmer''': I'm going in. I'm going in to rescue him.
:'''Holly''' ''(flatly, yeah-right mode)'': Rescue him.
:'''Rimmer''': It's my duty. My duty as a complete and utter bastard!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I'm alive! I can touch, I can feel, I can fondle - I'm alive! Don't you think it's incredible?
''(Rimmer decides to punctuate his sentence by bringing his fists down hard on two innocuous-looking crates that just happen to be labelled &quot;Explosives.&quot;)
:'''Rimmer''': I AM ALI -!
''(He's interrupted by the boxes exploding and sending bits and pieces of Arnold J. Rimmer all over the cargo decks. Lister, Cat and Kryten - with pieces of Rimmer's uniform scattered on their heads after the explosion - turn around to see what has happened.)''
:'''Cat''': What was he saying? ''(Lister shrugs)''

=== ''The Last Day'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': I used to be in the [[w:Samaritans (charity)|Samaritans]].
:'''Lister''': I know. For one morning.
:'''Rimmer''': I couldn't take any more.
:'''Lister''': I don't blame you. You spoke to five people and they all committed suicide. I wouldn't mind, but one was a wrong number! He only phoned up for the cricket scores!
:'''Rimmer''': Well, it's not ''my'' fault everyone chose that day to jump out of buildings! It made the papers, you know. &quot;Lemming Sunday,&quot; they called it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': At least he gets 24 hours notice, that's more than most of us get. Most of us get &quot;Mind that bus!&quot; &quot;What bus?&quot; Splat!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holly''': I never had a mum either.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, you can all have mine. Everyone else did.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Oh my goodness...Oooh...Oh, my head...what happened to me? Damage control report. ''(He pulls a slip of paper from a slot in his chest and reads it)'' &quot;Dehydration Level: 45%. Recall of previous evening: ''2%.'' Embarrassment Factor: ''91%?!'' Advised repair schedule: Reboot startup disk, offline for 36 hours and replace head.&quot; Boy, what a night!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Is it me or is that cockroach shuffling too loudly?
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, it's called a hangover, don't panic...
:'''Lister''': We're on a mining ship, 3 million years into deep space. Can someone explain to me where the smeg I got this traffic cone?!
:'''Cat''': Hey, it's not a good night unless you get a traffic cone! It's the policewoman's helmet and the suspenders I don't understand!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Is this the human value you call...friendship?
:'''Lister''': Don't give me that Star Trek crap, it's too early in the morning.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': It's alright sir, he's bluffing he's programed not to harm humans.
:'''Rimmer''': Ah, 'scuse me. Alright miladdo the party's over. I had about as much of this as I'm going to take. It's no good standing there with your chest and silly oiled nipples; doesn't impress me one bit. Now I don't know were you came from, and frankly I don't much care, but if you don't skedaddle pronto, you're going to see a side of me you won't much like.
:'''Lister''': What's he gonna do, drop his trousers?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': How do you take the safety catch off on this thing, Mr David? ''(Holding up bazookoid)''
:'''Lister''': The one on the back - at the side.
:'''Kryten''': The blue switch?
:'''Lister''': No, the orange one!
:'''Kryten''': I can't see an orange switch. There's a red switch here...
:'''Lister''': No, don't touch the red switch! That's the dismantler!

''(There is a clattering noise as the bazookoid falls apart)''

:'''Kryten''': Well, to coin a phrase: Whoops!

''(Hudzen arrives, and grabs him around the throat. With no apparent effort, the nutty mechanoid lifts Kryten off his feet and slams him against the wall)''

:'''Hudzen''': Time's up, tin can!

''(Lister ducks round behind him and fires his shotgun at point-blank range. It has no effect whatsoever)''

:'''Hudzen''': Don't be shy, boys, you can't all die at once!

''(Hudzen sends Lister flying with a single swipe, then turns his attention back to Kryten)''

:'''Hudzen''': See you in Silicon Heaven!
:'''Kryten''': It doesn't exist!
:'''Hudzen''': What doesn't exist?
:'''Kryten''': Silicon Heaven! There's no such place!
:'''Hudzen''': No such place as Silicon Heaven?
:'''Holly''': That's right! The whole place is a big con!
:'''Hudzen''': No such place as Silicon Heaven?
:'''Kryten''': No!
:'''Hudzen''': Then where do all the calculators go?
:'''Kryten''': They just die.

''(With a spasm of shock, Hudzen lets go of Kryten)''

:'''Hudzen''': Calculators just - die? No such pl...need...to...think...

''(Hudzen tilts to one side and freezes. After a few seconds, a chime sounds and the face of Jim Reaper appears on the screen set in Hudzen's stomach)''

:'''Reaper''': A metaphysical dichotomy has caused this unit to overload and shut down. Divadroid International would like to apologise for any inconvenience this may cause. A credit note will be forwarded to your company immediately.
:'''Lister''': What happened?
:'''Kryten''': He's an android. His brain couldn't handle the concept of there being no Silicon Heaven.
:'''Lister''': So how come yours can?
:'''Kryten''': Because I knew something he didn't.
:'''Lister''': What?
:'''Kryten''': I knew I was lying. No Silicon Heaven? Preposterous! Where would all the calculators go? ''(he and Lister fistbump)''

== Red Dwarf: Series IV (1991) ==

=== ''Camille'' ===
:'''Lister''': ''(Holding up a banana)'' Okay, let's try again. What is it?
:'''Kryten''': It's a banana.
:'''Lister''': No, it isn't. Try again. What is it?
:'''Kryten''': It's a banana?
:'''Lister''': ''(Exasperated)'' No, it isn't! What is it?
:'''Kryten''': It's an orrrr....It's an orrrr....
:'''Lister''': It's an orange! Go on, say it. It's an orange! This! Is! An orange!
:'''Kryten''': It's an orrrr...It's an orrrr...It's a banana!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Has anyone ever told you that the configuration and juxtaposition of your features is extraordinarily apposite?
:'''Camille''': Wow, you really know all the lines, don't you?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Oh, spin my nipple nuts and send me to Alaska!

=== ''D.N.A.'' ===
:'''Cat''': What was it like being a hamster?
:'''Lister''': It was better than being a chicken. Have you seen the size of an egg? Seen the size of a chicken's bum? That's what all the clucking was about. I was trying to say in chicken-talk &quot;for God's sake, give me an epidural!&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': ''[upon showing Lister a photo of his penis]'' Well?
:'''Lister''': Well what?
:'''Kryten''': Well, what do you think?
:'''Lister''': I'm not quite with you here, Kryten, what am I supposed to say?
:'''Kryten''': I want to know, is that normal?
:'''Lister''': What, taking photographs of it and showing it to your mates? No, it's not!
:'''Kryten''': Well, i - is it supposed to look like that?
:'''Lister''': Well, yeah.
:'''Kryten''': But it's hideous! That's the best design they could come up with!? Are you seriously telling me there were choices and someone said, &quot;Ah. There. That's it. That's the shape we're looking for; the 'last-chicken-in-the-shop' look?&quot; Shakespeare had one? Einstein? Perry Como sang 'Memories Are Made of This' with one of those stashed in his slacks?!
:'''Lister''': Well, yeah.
:'''Kryten''': No wonder humans don't have a zoom mode!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': No vacuum cleaner should give a human being a double polaroid!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': I've been a complete and total polaroid-head.
:'''Lister''': Yeah, you've had your head right up your recharge socket.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Of course, lager! The only thing that can kill a [[w:vindaloo|vindaloo]]!

=== ''Justice'' ===
:''[Lister looks at the stasis pod, while suffering from Space Mumps]''
:'''Lister''': So who is she, Holly?
:'''Holly''': Says on the pod, Barbara Bellini
:'''Lister''': Barbara Bellini, what a beautiful name. There's no justice, how can this happen to me? Maybe I can wear a turban and pretend I'm from India.
:'''Cat''': Maybe you can stick a spike in your head and pretend you're the Taj Mahal!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': So, if it's not Bellini in there, who is it?
:'''Rimmer''': One of the prisoners. And considering the ship was transporting forty psychotic, half-crazed, mass-murdering, super-strong androids, we thought it prudent to find out who the smeg was in there before we woke them up.
:'''Kryten''': With respect, sir, they're not androids. They're simulants.
:'''Cat''': What's the difference?
:'''Kryten''': Well, the basic difference is that an android would never rip off a human's head and spit down his neck.
:'''Lister''': Can we stop it, Hol?
:'''Holly''': What? Oh. No. One-way process.
:'''Lister''': Can't we X-ray the pod?
:'''Holly''': No. Lead lining. That's to survive in space, innit?
:'''Lister''': There must be ''some'' way of finding out.
:'''Holly''': Well, there ''is.'' All you 'ave to do is 'ang around 'ere for 24 hours. Then, if you find your limbs scattered across deep space and your neck full of saliva, you can take it as read it probably wasn't Babs.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After sitting through 3 hours of a slideshow of Rimmer's holiday on the diesel decks]''
:'''Kryten''': Oh, sir, can we take a break for a while? It appears my intelligence circuits have melted.
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, we're not going to get through them all if we take a second break.
:'''Kryten''': Sir, that's a gamble I'm willing to take!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Cat''' ''(spattered with vile yellow gunk)'': I don't wanna ''live!'' Someone, please...''shoot me in the head!''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Lister takes the witness stand]''
:'''Kryten''': Name?
:'''Lister''': Dave Lister.
:'''Kryten''': Occupation?
:'''Lister''': ''[looks bewildered for a moment, then answers]'' Uh, bum.
:'''Kryten''': Sir, would you describe the accused [Rimmer] as a friend?
:'''Cat''': Take [[w:Fifth Amendment to the United States Constitution|the Fifth]]!
:'''Kryten''': Sir, please answer the question. Remember you are under polygraphic surveillance: Would you describe the accused as a friend?
:'''Lister''': No, I'd describe the accused as a git.
:'''Kryten''': Who would you say, then, is the person who thinks of him most fondly?
:'''Lister''': I do.
:'''Kryten''': Hmm. And are there no others who shared moments of imtimacy with him?
:'''Lister''': Only one, but she's got a puncture.
:'''Rimmer''': Objection!

=== ''White Hole'' ===
:'''Lister:''' If you don't eat, like, 400 rounds of toast every hour, he throws a major wobbler. That's what caused the accident in the first place.
:'''Kryten:''' What accident?
:'''Lister:''' The accident involving me, the Toaster, the waste disposal and a 14-pound lump hammer!
:'''Kryten:''' That explains why he was down in the garbage hold in three thousand separate pieces.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister:''' Look, I don't want any toast, and ''he (pointing to Kryten)'' doesn't want any toast. In fact, no-one around 'ere wants any toast! Not now - not ever. No toast!
:'''Talkie Toaster''': How 'bout a muffin?
:'''Lister:''' Or muffins, we don't like muffins round 'ere! We want no muffins, no toast, no tea cakes, no buns, baps, baguettes or bagels, no croissants, no crumpets, no pancakes, no potato cakes and no hot cross buns! And ''definitely'' no smegging flapjacks!
:'''Talkie Toaster:''' ''(after a very brief pause)'': Ah, so you're a waffle man!
:'''Lister''': You see?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': NO TOAST!
:'''Toaster''': But I am a toaster. It is my ''raison d'etre.'' I toast, therefore I am. If you don't want any toast, why did you repair me, hm?
:'''Lister''': Yeah, why did you repair him?
:'''Kryten''': He's a guinea pig for a technique called &quot;Intelligence Compression.&quot; His AI chips were very badly damaged in the accident.
:'''Toaster''': But that was no accident! That was first-degree toastercide!
:'''Lister''': Just shut your grill!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Talkie Toaster''': I have a third question. A ''sensible'' question. A question that will test the limits of your new IQ to its very limits and stretch the sinews of your knowledge to bursting point!
:'''Holly''': This is gonna be about waffles, isn't it?
:'''Talkie Toaster''' ''(sounding hurt, as it's been caught out)'': Certainly not. And I resent the implication that I'm a one-dimensional bread-obsessed electrical appliance!
:'''Holly''': I apologise, Toaster, what's the question?
:'''Talkie Toaster''': The question is this: given that God is infinite, and that the Universe is also infinite...would you like a toasted teacake?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Realising she only has 3 minutes to live after having her IQ upgraded Holly decides to shut off all power, causing concern for the crew]]''
:'''Kryten''': Can anyone hear anything?
:'''Cat''': No.
:'''Kryten''': Exactly, no one can hear anything, and do you know why we can't hear anything?
:'''Rimmer''': (''annoyed'') Why?
:'''Kryten''': (''in a spooky voice'') Because there are no sounds to hear!
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, isn't it around this time that your head goes back to the lab for re-tuning?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The crew are talking about how to go back to the bridge through closed doors.]''
:'''Cat''': I've got it. We laser our way through.
:'''Kryten''': An excellent plan, with just two drawbacks: One, we don't have a power source for lasers; and two, we don't have any lasers.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': But there are fifty-three doors between here and the Science Room!
:'''Lister''': They're only internal doors, they're only a light alloy. We could get through 'em if we had a battering ram. Something... I dunno... about six foot long, fairly sturdy, with a flat top.
:''[Everyone looks at Kryten]''
:'''Kryten''': 53 doors?! You can't be serious!
:''[53 doors later]''
:'''Lister''': You alright, man?
:'''Kryten''': I'm fine, thank you, Susan.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Come on, man, you gotta sacrifice your life. I'm not asking you to do anything I wouldn't do.
:'''Rimmer''': You? You'd sacrifice your life for the good of the crew?
:'''Cat''': No! I'd sacrifice ''YOUR'' life for the good of the crew.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Computer Senility. It's such a weird condition.
:'''Kryten''': I know. I had a mechanoid friend once who suffered from the same affliction. His name was Gilbert, but he preferred it if people called him &quot;Rameses Niblick III, Kerplunk-Kerplunk, ''Whoops'', Where's My Thribble?&quot;. A sad case.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, if you ask me the eskimos had the right idea. They knew how to handle the elderly and the permanently baffled: middle of the night, they'd take them out into the blizzard, remove their pyjamas, and just leave them to it.
:'''Kryten''': That's how eskimos cared for their old people?
:'''Rimmer''': Absolutely. That's why there's no eskimo word for 'Eastbourne'.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Great! Where does this leave us?!
:'''Kryten''': It leaves us floating aimlessly in space with no navigation and a rapidly diminishing emergency power supply. It leaves us galloping up diarrhea drive without a saddle.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Let me get this straight. Is she doing what I think she's doing?
:'''Cat''': Why? What ''do'' you think she's doing?
:'''Lister''': Playing pool with planets.
:'''Rimmer''': Is that possible?
:'''Lister''': Well, it's not going to work. It's completely insane. It's whacko. It's noodle-doodle.
:'''Cat''': I'm with you, buddy.
:'''Lister''': No, not the idea, the shot. There's not enough side.
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Side?&quot;
:'''Lister''': Yeah, side-spin. It's a complete mis-cue.
:'''Rimmer''': What are you drivelling about, Lister? We're talking about a computer with an IQ in excess of twelve thousand.
:'''Lister''': Doesn't mean she can play pool. I can. Trust me. I know whereof I speak. Aigburth Arms on a Friday night, they used to call me Dave &quot;Cinzano Bianco&quot; Lister, 'cause once I was on the table, you couldn't get rid of me. This pool arm is as sound as a dollarpound, and I promise you that shot will ''not come off!'' She's ''topped'' it, that's what she's done, she's topped it! It's a felt-ripper! That planet is off the table and into somebody's pint of beer!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': You're going to drink an entire six-pack of wicked-strength lager?
:'''Lister''': I'm not going to get plastered, Rimmer, just...just ''nicely'' drunk.
:'''Rimmer''': Define 'nicely drunk', is 'nicely drunk' horizontal or perpendicular?
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, I can handle it.
:'''Kryten''': I'm not sure ''I'' can!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': If you miss, we're going to get a planet in the face.
:'''Lister''': I'm not going to mish.
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Mish&quot;?
:'''Lister''': What?
:'''Rimmer''': &quot;Mish&quot;, 'I'm not going to mish' you said. You've only had 4 cans and you're steaming!
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, will you relax? I know what I'm doing, I am not pished!
:''[walks into something off camera with a loud clatter]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': And since these events never happened, I would like to take the opportunity to say that you are the most obnoxious, trumped-up, farty little smeghead it has ever been my misfortune to encounter!

=== ''Dimension Jump'' ===
:'''Mellie''': What are you doing at lunchtime?
:'''[[w:Ace Rimmer|Ace]]''': Not sure, why?
:'''Mellie''': If you're interested, I'll be in my quarters, covered in maple syrup.
:'''Ace''': I'm sorry, Mellie, I don't fraternise with the staff.
:'''Mellie''': I resign.
:'''Ace''': I'll be there at 13:00.
:'''Mellie''': (''breaks the fourth wall'') What a guy!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ace''': Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': What is it about me? It's always been the same old story. It's not easy to look in that mirror and see a guy nobody likes.
:'''Cat''': How do you think we feel? We gotta look at it all day!
:'''Lister''': ''[lying]'' We just thought you wouldn't wanna come.
:'''Rimmer''': I try to be liked, God knows I try. I regale you with amusing stories of my time in the [[w:Hammond Organ|Hammond Organ]] Owners' Society. You never laugh. I offer to talk you through my photo collection of 20th-century telegraph poles. You've always got some excuse. None of you like [[w:Morris dance|Morris dancing]]. Would that break your hearts, every once in a while, getting our knees in the air, the jingle of bells, the clonk of wood on wood? Every time I suggest it, you pretend to be ill.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': You don't like Reggie Wilson? What? Not even &quot;Pop Goes Delius&quot; or &quot;Funking Up Wagner&quot;?
:'''Lister''': I prefer something slightly more melodious, like the long, drawn-out death rattle of a man suffering from terminal flatulence.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': You've got it wrong, man. We just thought you wouldn't want to come. Now we know you do, great, you can come. The way you're going on about it, it's like some major conspiracy, we've been planning it for days. We haven't. ''(which of course is a lie)''
:'''Rimmer''': Really?
:'''Lister''': Really.
:'''Rimmer''': All right, then, I'll come. I'll just get changed. Holly?
:'''Holly''' ''(Appears on the screen wearing a fishing cap)'': Oh, who woke'' 'im'' up?!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[in a scathing tone]'' I recognize you two. Weren't you two the double action centrefold in July's edition of &quot;Big Boys in Boots&quot;?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Skipper?
:'''Ace''': Thought he deserved a nickname, Skipper sounded good.
:'''Rimmer''': Ace and Skipper? You sound like a kids TV series about a boy and his bush kangaroo.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ace''': Skipper, I've decided I'm not going to stay.
:'''Lister''': Why?
:'''Ace''': Him and me. It would never work. I just can't stand to be near the man. To see myself so warped, so bitter, so weasely. The man's a maggot.
:'''Lister''': So where're you going to go?
:'''Ace''': Just out there. I can't go back. But there's a billion other realities to explore. A billion other Arnold Rimmers to meet. Maybe somewhere there's one who's more of a pain in the butt than him. But I doubt it.
:'''Lister''': Well, good luck, man. And, look, don't be too hard on Rimmer. You got the break, he didn't. He's just bitter.
:'''Ace''': D'you know what that break was? At the age of seven, one of us was kept back a year, the other one wasn't. ''(Gestures to knot on his arm stitches)'' Put your finger on that, would you, Skipper? ''(Tugs sharply on thread and breaks it)''
:'''Lister''': And that's the only difference? Rimmer went down a year, and you stayed up?
:'''Ace''' ''(delivering the surprise)'': No. ''I'' was the one who went down a year. By his terms, ''he'' got the break. But being kept down a year made me. The humiliation...being the tallest boy in the class by a clear foot. It changed me, made me buckle down, made me fight back. And I've been fighting back ever since.
:'''Lister''': While he spent the rest of his life making excuses.
:'''Ace''': Maybe he's right. Maybe I did get the lucky break.

=== ''Meltdown'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': ''[in a squeaky voice, after Lister swallowed and then spat out his light bee]'' My God, that was ''disgusting!''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': What now?
''(Kryten is looking off camera and up; he looks a little worried)''
:'''Kryten''': Well, I suggest we start to run, sir. I suggest we ambulate as fast as the local gravity will allow.
:'''Rimmer''': Why?
:'''Kryten''': Because of ''them,'' sir.
''(We see a Kaiju that looks like a T-rex with feathers, wings, a bird's head and all the believability of an old Star Trek monster)''
:'''Kryten''': Sir?
''(We see Kryten looking very worried and Rimmer running full tilt off into the distance)''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caligula''': Very well. Rasputin, bring in the bucket of soapy frogs and remove his trousers.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': He's a ''transvestite''?
:'''Lister''': Yeah!
:'''Cat''': With ''those'' hips?!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': What's it made of?
:'''Lister''': Wood. It's kind of an inverted L shape made of wood.
:'''Cat''': Does it have a kind of rope motif?
:'''Lister''': There is a kind of noosey theme to it, yeah!
:'''Cat''': It's gallows! Look if it's gallows then say it's gallows! I can take it!
:'''Lister''': Ok! It's gallows!
:'''Cat''': Waah! They're building the gallows to hang us!
:'''Lister''': Look man, don't panic. We're gonna escape.
:'''Cat''': How?
:'''Lister''': Just...hijack the guards when they come in, nick their uniforms and stroll out.
:'''Cat''': Are you insane? Do you seriously expect me to wear grey out of season? I'd rather hang.
:'''Lister''': Hang on, hang on. Something's happening. Some kind of parade or drill but...
:'''Cat''': But what?
:'''Lister''': Hang on. These guys aren't Nazis...they're all wearing different period costumes. There's one looks like Al Capone, there's another like Mussolini, Richard III, Napoleon. Smeg, it's like all the worst people in history have been brought together in one place. Oh my God, there's James Last! I recognize him from Rimmer's record collection.
:'''Cat''': What are they doing?.
:'''Lister''': Well, just lining up in ... in some kind of firing squad. Whoa, Whoa! Hang on, hang on. Someone's being brought out, they're tying him to a stake. (''looking horrified'') It's Winnie the Pooh.
:'''Cat''': What?
:'''Lister''': Winnie the Pooh, I swear! He's refusing the blindfold.
:'''Cat''': They're tying Winnie the Pooh to a stake?
''[Gunshots ring out, and Lister's face slackens into a stunned expression]''
:'''Lister''': ...That's something ''no one'' should ever have to see.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Rimmer tells Lister of his great &quot;victory&quot; leading the good droids against the fascist droids.]''
:'''Rimmer''': There are always casualties in war, gentlemen, otherwise it wouldn't be war. Just a rather nasty argument with a lot of pushing and shoving.
:'''Lister''': So how many survived?
:'''Rimmer''': Well, we haven't had time to make a full official estimate. But at a rough guess, and obviously this is subject to alteration pending information updates, roundabout: none of them.
:'''Lister''': So you wiped out the entire population of this planet?
:'''Rimmer''': You make it sound so negative, Lister. Don't you see? The deranged menace that once threatened this world is vanquished!
:'''Lister''': No it isn't, pal. You're still here!
:'''Rimmer''': I brought about peace! Peace, freedom and democracy!
:'''Lister''': Yeah, Rimmer, right, absolutely. Now all the corpses that litter that battlefield can just lie there, safe under the knowledge that they snuffed it under a flag of peace, and can now happily decompose in a land of freedom. Ya smeghead.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lister swallows Rimmer's light bee]''
:'''Kryten''': Sir! What are you thinking of?
:'''Lister''': It's okay. He'll come out in a couple a days, and he'll have been through what he put us through. Does anyone fancy a vindaloo?

== Red Dwarf: Series V (1992) ==

=== ''Holoship'' ===
:'''Cat''': What, am I the only sane one here? Why don't we drop the defensive shields?
:'''Kryten''': A superlative suggestion, sir, with just two minor flaws. One: we don't have any defensive shields. And two: we don't have any defensive shields. Now I realise that, technically speaking, that's only one flaw; but I thought it was such a big one, it was worth mentioning twice.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Lister to Red Dwarf. We have in our midst a complete smeg pot. Brains in the anal region. Chin absent, presumed missing. Genitalia small and inoffensive. Of no value or interest.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': They've taken Mr. Rimmer! Sir, they've taken Mr. Rimmer!
:'''Cat''': Quick — let's get out of here before they bring him back!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Rimmer and the hologram Nirvana Crane have just finished having casual sex.]''
:'''Rimmer''': That was just unbelievable!
:'''Nirvana''': It's never been like that before.
:'''Rimmer''': Was it OK?
:'''Nirvana''': It was...different.
:'''Rimmer''': Different?
:'''Nirvana''': You make love like a Japanese meal - small portions, but so many courses.
:'''Rimmer''': Look, Nirvana , I hope you didn't get me wrong just now, that meant nothing to me, truly less than nothing, really.
:'''Nirvana''': Good.
:'''Rimmer''': We may as well have been playing tennis.
:'''Nirvana''': As it should be.
:'''Rimmer''': I don't suppose you fancy a tie break?
:'''Nirvana''': You know, we usually talk.
:'''Rimmer''': What do you talk about?
:'''Nirvana''': Research, new theories, mission profiles.
:'''Rimmer''': I'm sorry, I must have seemed very ignorant. I hardly said anything apart from 'Geronimo!'
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': What you're suggesting is immoral and illegal. Mind patching is outlawed.
:'''Rimmer''': But it ''is'' possible.
:'''Kryten''': Possible but highly dangerous. The side effects can be devastating. You could be reduced to a gibbering simpleton.
:'''Cat''': Reduced?
:'''Rimmer''': I don't care. I'm prepared to take the chance.
:'''Lister''': Even if it costs you your mind?
:'''Cat''': It's a small price to pay.
:'''Rimmer''': Look, on that ship I can touch, I can feel, I can taste. I'm not a half man any more. With them I'm whole again.
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, they're a bunch of arrogant, pompous, emotionally weird, stuck-up megalomaniacs. Do you really think you're going to fit in with them? ''(Pause)'' What am I saying? ''Bon voyage!''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Wasn't it St. Francis of Assisi himself who said, &quot;Never give a sucker an even break&quot;?
:'''Kryten''': Well, if he did, sir, it was strictly off the record.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Rimmer is saying goodbye to the other Dwarfers]''
:'''Rimmer''': Look, I'm not much good at big speeches, and I know I haven't always been an easy guy to get on with. And I know that, given the choice, I probably wouldn't have chosen you as friends. But, I just want to say that over the years, I have come to regard you as...people I met. I'd just better go, OK?
:'''Lister''': See you, smeghead.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, and sir, you're wrong. We won't be apart, we just...won't be together.

''(A look of disgust comes over Rimmer's face)''

:'''Rimmer''': I ''cannot'' believe I just said that! ''(he leaves)''

=== ''The Inquisitor'' ===
:'''Holly''': We're locked out!
:'''Kryten''': This is not a malfunction, there's something controlling the craft!
:'''Rimmer''': Holly, any traffic around?
:'''Holly''': Nothing on the local scan.
:'''Kryten''': This isn't possible! There must be -
:'''Inquisitor''' ''(through Lister)'': I am in possession of the human known as Lister. Do not attempt to resist me!
:'''Cat''': What happened to ''him?'' His voice finally break?
:'''Kryten''' ''(realising what's happening)'': Uh, who ''are'' you?
:'''Inquisitor''' ''(through Lister)'': Tremble at my name, for I am the Inquisitor!
:'''Kryten''': The Inquisitor?!
:'''Inquisitor''' ''(through Lister)'': Your vessel is under my control. It will return you to your mother ship, where you will face judgement. You will each present a case to justify your existence. If you fail, you will be deleted.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': So, Kryten, you've heard of this &quot;Inquisitor&quot;?
:'''Kryten''': Only as a myth; a dark fable; a horror tale, told across the flickering embers of a midnight fire, wherever hardened space dogs gather to drink fermented vegetable products and compete in tales of blood-chilling terror!
:'''Rimmer''': A simple &quot;yes&quot; would have sufficed.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Kryten''': That is the Inquisitor; he prunes away the wastrels, expunges the wretched and deletes the worthless!
:'''Rimmer''': We're in big trouble!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Sir! Sir, you don't have to be a great philanthropist, or a missionary worker, you simply have to seize the gift of life!
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, God.
:'''Kryten''': Make a contribution.
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, God.
:'''Kryten''': No matter how small.
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, God.
:'''Kryten''': You simply have to have led a life that wasn't totally egocentric, vain and self-serving.
:'''Rimmer''': You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?
:'''Kryten''': I'm just trying to make you feel better, sir.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, shut up then!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': 'ang on a minute, why should we take any notice of some crazed rogue robot who's appointed 'imself judge and jury to the whole of humanity? Why should we kowtow to his judgement?
:'''Inquisitor''' ''(through Lister)'': ''Because I have the power to snap your body in two like a dry reed!!!''
:'''Lister''' ''(gasping)'': Good answer, man, good answer!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Inquisitor''': You have been granted the greatest gift of all: the gift of life. Tell me - what have you done to deserve this superlative good fortune?
:'''Rimmer''': Well, I - I say this with the highest respect, but...what gives you the right to ask - no, actually, ''demand'' - that answer of me - your magnificence? ''(this last is delivered hurriedly with a bow)''
:'''Inquisitor''': ''ALL'' must answer to the Inquisitor!
:'''Rimmer''': But how do I know I'll get a fair hearing?
:'''Inquisitor''': Because...like all who stand before the Inquisitor...your judge shall be...''(he flips up his visor revealing...Rimmer!)''...yourself!
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, smeg.
:'''Inquisitor Rimmer''': 'Oh, smeg' indeed, matey!
:'''Rimmer''': Everyone is judged by their own self?
:'''Inquisitor Rimmer''': It's a bit metaphysical, I know, but it's the only fair way. Now then: justify yourself.
:'''Rimmer''': Well...first, I've -
:'''Inquisitor Rimmer''': Liar!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Inquisitor Cat''': Justify your existence. What contribution have you made?
:'''Cat''': I have given pleasure to the world because I have such a beautiful ass!
:'''Inquisitor Cat''': Well, that's true.
:'''Cat''': Can I go now?
:'''Inquisitor Cat''': ...That's your case?!
:'''Cat''': You need ''more?!''
:'''Inquisitor Cat''': Some might say that's a pretty shallow argument.
:'''Cat''': Some might say I'm a pretty shallow guy, but a shallow guy with a great ass!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Inquisitor Kryten''': Well, Kryten? Justify yourself.
:'''Kryten''': I'm not sure I ''can''.
:'''Inquisitor Kryten''': But surely your life is replete with good works? There can be few individuals who have lived a more selfless life.
:'''Kryten''': But I am ''programmed'' to live unselfishly. And therefore, any good works I do come not out of fine motives, but as a result of a series of binary commands I am compelled to obey.
:'''Inquisitor Kryten''': Well, then, how can ''any'' mechanical justify himself?
:'''Kryten''': Perhaps only if he attempted to ''break'' his programming and conduct his life according to a set of values he arrived at independently.
:'''Inquisitor Kryten''': Your argument invites deletion.
:'''Kryten''': The rules are yours, not mine.
:'''Inquisitor Kryten''': Do you wish to be erased?
:'''Kryten''': I am programmed not to wish for anything. I serve.
:'''Inquisitor Kryten''': In a human, this type of behaviour ''could'' be considered &quot;stubborn&quot;.
:'''Kryten''': But I am ''not'' human. And neither are ''you''. And it is not our place to judge them. I wonder why you do.
:'''Inquisitor''': ''(closing his visor)'' Enough!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Inquisitor Lister''': ''(Opening his visor)'' Well, get out o' ''this'' one, smeghead.
:'''Lister''': What are you talking about?
:'''Inquisitor Lister''': You know what you could have made of your life if you'd tried, what you could've become.
:'''Lister''': So?
:'''Inquisitor Lister''': You've got ''brains,'' man, brains you've never used.
:'''Lister''': So?
:'''Inquisitor Lister''': So justify yourself.
:'''Lister''': Spin on it!
:'''Inquisitor''': ''(closing his visor)'' The Inquisition is over...
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Uh-oh, the door. We'd better use an air vent.
:'''Lister''': No need.
:'''Kryten''': Sir?
:'''Lister''': Look, I'm gonna do something now, Kryten, that's totally, totally gross. I don't want you to look. Turn around.
:'''Kryten''': What?
:'''Lister''': Trust me, you don't wanna know!
''(Krytrn reluctantly turns around. Lister pulls the object he picked up earlier out of his jacket...it's a hand. He presses the severed hand to the palm-print device, and the door opens. He puts the hand back in his jacket and turns around. Kryten has a sick look of realization on his face.)
:'''Kryten''': Logically, sir, there is only ''one'' way you could have possibly have opened that door. I feel quite nauseous. Where is it?
:'''Lister''' ''(innocently)'': Where's what?
:'''Kryten''': Oh, sir! You've got it in your jacket!!
:'''Lister''': I got us out of the hold, didn't I?
:'''Kryten''': Sir, you are sick! You are a sick, sick person!
:'''Lister''': Shut up.
:'''Kryten''': How can you possibly even conceive of such an idea?
:'''Lister''': Shut up! Or I'll beat you to death with the wet end!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Listen, Kryten, I've been thinkin' about this, I've come up with something.
:'''Kryten''': Yes, sir?
:'''Lister''': I'm gonna use my brains for the first time in my life.
:'''Kryten''': Considering the circumstances, sir, do you really believe that's wise?

=== ''Terrorform'' ===
:'''Kryten''': Kryten Personal Black Box Recording. Time: unknown. Location: unknown. Cause of accident: unknown. Perhaps if someone finds this recording it will shed light as to what happened here. My short-term memory appears to have been erased.This I ascribe to the proximity of the magnetic coils from Starbug's rear engine. ''(He looks around briefly)'' Secondly, due to the proximity of the magnetic coils, my short-term memory appears to have been erased.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lister''': OK. I'm here, what's the beef?
:'''Holly''': We've got a visitor.
:'''Lister''': What?
:'''Holly''': A pod arrived about 20 minutes ago. Something was in it, but it's broken free.
:'''Lister''': Any ideas?
:'''Holly''': Well, I don't want to spread any panic or alarm.
''(comedic pause)''
:'''Lister''': Whaddya mean, you don't wanna spread panic and alarm?
:'''Holly''': Well, you've always had this thing against tarantulas, haven't you?
:'''Lister''': ''(worried)'' Tarantulas?
:'''Holly''': I mean that you've never been overly fond of them as a species, have you?
:'''Lister''': Well, no.
:'''Holly''': And the prospect of waking up and finding one crawling over your clammy, naked, helpless body has always filled you with a kind of cold dread?
:'''Lister''': Well, yeah. W - what are you trying to say to me, Holly?
:'''Holly''': I'm saying it might not be your night.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Sir, a couple of brief points: firstly, you are not a qualified service engineer, and consequently, sawing me in two will invalidate my guarantee; secondly, I wouldn't trust you to open a can of sardines that was already open.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Is this the British Embassy? Does it even look the remotest bit like the British Embassy? I want to know who you are, what I'm doing here, and I want to know now!
:'''Druid''': In accordance with the appetites of the Dark One, malicious ruler of this domain, we, the Hooded Legions, proffer up this sacrifice to slake the vile depraved thirstings of the Unspeakable One.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, that's cleared that one up.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Err, where are you going? Err, what are you doing? My God! Are you going to take a flying leap?
:'''Maid''': We are going to summon the Master.
:'''Rimmer''': The Master?
:'''Maid''': You have been prepared for him.
:'''Rimmer''': This 'Master' character - and I acknowledge that I may not want to know the full answer to this one - but why does he want me oily in particular? Obviously, whatever he has in mind is facilitated by my being slippery and pliant, yes?
:'''Second maid''': He always likes his victims to be oiled. An oiled body is so much better for conducting the electricity.
:'''Rimmer''': Not the best news, but it could have been worse.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Unspeakable One''': Silence, you dank tuft of rectal pubic hair!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Okay. I say let's get into the jet-powered rocket pants and junior birdman the hell out of here!
:'''Kryten''': An excellent and inventive suggestion, sir, with just two tiny drawbacks: a) We don't have any jet-powered rocket pants; and b) there's no such thing as jet-powered rocket pants outside the fictional serial &quot;Robbie Rocket Pants.&quot;
:'''Cat''': Well, that's put a crimp on an otherwise damn fine plan.

=== ''Quarantine'' ===
:'''Lister''': We're a real Mickey Mouse operation, aren't we?
:'''Cat''': Mickey Mouse? We ain't even Betty Boop!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Hildegarde Lanstrom''': Schopenhauer was right, vouldn't you say? Life vithout pain has no meaning. Gentlemen, I vish to give your lives meaning...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Hildegarde Lanstrom''': (''over radio'') Hello, my name is Doctor Hildegarde Lanstrom and I'm quite, ''quite'' mad.
:'''Rimmer''': (''jokingly'') Are you really? How absolutely splendid.
:'''Dr. Hildegarde Lanstrom''': I have a riddle for you. What's dead, and dead, and dead all over?
:'''Rimmer''': Give in Doctor Fruitloop, do tell me.
:'''Dr. Lanstrom''': (''Sing-song voice'') Yoooooooooooooooooooou! (''The console explodes'')
:'''Rimmer''': Well we know what to get ''you'' for Christmas: a double lobotomy and ten rolls of rubber wallpaper.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[discussing the looming 3 months in quarantine]''
:'''Kryten''': Sir, it's a scientific fact that the human male needs to spend time by himself.
:'''Lister''': Is it?
:'''Kryten''': Hm, the most popular pastimes have always been ones that males can enjoy alone. Angling, golf and of course the all time number one.
:'''Cat''': It's not just humans, look what happens when two male tigers are locked up together. One of them winds up on the others toothpick.
:'''Kryten''': Lions, tigers, scorpions, rats. Even vultures when they're in captivity.
:'''Lister''': What are you saying to me? 'Vultures need personal space'? They need time alone to put their feet up and read 'What Carcass?' magazine?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after 5 days]''
:'''Lister''': I'm just saying, there's 79 more days to go.
:'''Kryten''': And if you still want to be alive when there's only 78 more days to go, I suggest you do ''not'' blow your nose.
:'''Lister''': Do you mind if I ask why?
:'''Kryten''': Well, let's forget the noise and the revolting burbling sound and get straight to the really gross part when you always, and I do mean ALWAYS, having blown your nose, you have to open up the handkerchief and take a look at the contents. I mean, ''why''? What do expect to see in there? A Turner seascape perhaps? The face of the Madonna? An undiscovered Shakespearean sonnet?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Gentlemen... your conversation makes interesting listening.
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, is that you?
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, yes...
:'''Lister''': How long have you been listenin'?
:'''Rimmer''': Two, maybe three hours...
:'''Lister''': Well nobody's got any disease, man.
:'''Cat''': We're clean.
:'''Kryten''': You have to re-screen us, sir, as per directive 699.
:'''Lister''': No-one's got any virus, and no-one's smeggin' nuts!
:'''Rimmer''': Well that's good.
:''[The lights come up, and Rimmer is shown sitting wearing a red and white gingham dress and army boots]''
:'''Rimmer''': Is something amiss?
:'''Lister''': Hell no! What could possibly be amiss?
:'''Rimmer''': You don't think anything's amiss? I'm wearing a red and white checked gingham dress... and army boots... and you think nothing is amiss?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I can't let you out.
:'''Lister''': Why not?
:'''Rimmer''': Because the King of the Potato People wont let me. (''laughter'') I begged him, I got down on my knees, and wept. He wants to keep you here... Keep you here for ten years.
:'''Cat''': Can we see him?
:'''Rimmer''': See who?
:'''Cat''': The King.
:'''Rimmer''': Do you have a magic carpet?
:'''Lister''': Yeh...a little three seater!
:'''Rimmer''': So let me get this straight: you want to fly on a magic carpet, to see the king of the potato people, and plead with him for your freedom... and you're telling me you're completely sane? I think that calls for two hours of W-O-O.
:'''Lister''': ''[panicked]'' What's W-O-O?
:'''Cat''': You ''had'' to ask...
:'''Rimmer''': With... Out.. Oxygen! Two hours without oxygen. That'll teach you to be breadbaskets! (''fades'')

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': They've been naughty boys, haven't they, Mr Flibble?
:'''&quot;Mr Flibble&quot;''': Yes.
:'''Rimmer''': What happens to naughty boys who've been naughty, Mr Flibble?
:'''&quot;Mr Flibble&quot;''': Uncle Arnie fries them alive with his hex vision.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Kryten man! Are you okay?
:'''Kryten''': I have a medium-sized fire axe buried in my spinal column. That sort of thing can really put a crimp on your day.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Mr Flibble is very cross, you shouldn't have run away from him. What are we going to do with them Mr Flibble?
:''[Rimmer raises his arm to his ear and Mr Flibble 'whispers' into Rimmer's ear]''
:'''Rimmer''': (''pretending to be shocked, mock-gasps'') We can't possibly do that! Who'd clear up the mess?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': (''after ramming his head on a metal column'') Aah, that's better. Maybe now I can WIN SELF-DETERMINATION FOR THE SOUTH MALDAVIAN PEOPLE!!!!

=== ''Demons &amp; Angels'' ===
:'''Holly''': Rude alert! Rude alert! An electrical fire has knocked out my voice recognition unicycle! Many Wurlitzers are missing from my database. Abandon shop! This is not a daffodil. Repeat: This is not a daffodil.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, thankfully Holly's unaffected.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': I'll tell you one thing. I've been to a parallel universe, I've seen time running backwards, I've played pool with planets and I've given birth to twins, but I never thought in my entire life I'd taste an edible [[w:Pot Noodle|Pot Noodle]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''High Cat''': We find clothes to be a distraction from the pursuit of spiritual and intellectual fulfillment.
:'''Cat''': Really? I find spiritual and intellectual fulfillment to be a distraction from the pursuit of clothes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': These are our higher selves. They are who we could have become if all the negative aspects of our characters were removed.
:'''Rimmer''': You mean hippies.
:'''Kryten''': With respect sir, you think Jesus was a hippie.
:'''Rimmer''': Well, he was. He had long hair and he didn't have a job. What more do you want?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Dave, Higher Cat, and Rimmer have all passed by a junction of two corridors Higher Kryten stops and yells down it]''
:'''High Kryten''': Welcome, brothers, we bring food and medical supplies.
:''[High Kryten is shot once in the left shoulder by an unseen person. Lister pulls him away from the junction.]''
:'''High Kryten''': Poor devil, his gun must have gone off accidentally.
:''[High Kryten steps back out into the junction.]''
:'''High Kryten''': Welcome, my children, we bring you balms and tinctures.
:''[High Kryten is shot two more times, once in the left shoulder, and once in the abdomen.]''
:'''High Kryten''': We would be pleased to sing you healing hymns!
:''[High Kryten is shot two more times and falls. Lister steps out into the junction.]''
:'''Lister''': Is he dead?
:'''Rimmer''': We can only hope.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Low Rimmer''': I'm going to lash you to within an inch of your life, and then... I'm going to have you.

=== ''Back to Reality'' ===
:'''Kryten''': Question which occurs: if this ocean is supposed to be teeming with new lifeforms, where are they all?
:'''Lister''': What are you implying?
:'''Kryten''': No implication intended, sir.
:'''Lister''': Yes, there is. You're saying there's some huge damn fish out there, aren't yer? Some kinda gigantic weird pre-historic leviathan who's porked his way through this entire ocean.
:'''Kryten''': That's one option.
:'''Lister''': Any alternatives?
:'''Kryten''': None that occur.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Don't fish swim south for the winter?
:'''Kryten''': No, sir. That's birds.
:'''Cat''': Birds swim south for the winter? How do they breathe?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Why would a haddock kill itself? ...Why am I even asking that question?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I know that, emotionally speaking, this isn't the news you want to hear right now. But there's a blob on the sonar scope the size of New Mexico and it's heading your way.
:'''Holly''': I think our friend the Suicide Squid is about to put in an appearance.
:'''Kryten''': Where is it, precisely?
:'''Rimmer''': Directly above you. Two thousand fathoms and diving.
:'''Lister''': Oh, thanks a lot, Rimmer. You know the state we're in and you have to go and give us news like that. You couldn't have ''lied?''
:'''Rimmer''': I ''was'' lying. It's only ''one'' thousand fathoms.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': This venom — are we safe in here?
:'''Lister''': It penetrated the hull of a class D space corps seeding ship. In comparison, we're a sardine tin.
:'''Rimmer''': It's coming straight for us.
:'''Lister''': There's only three alternatives: it thinks we're either a threat, food or a mate.... It's either gonna kill us, eat us or hump us. Either we persuade him we're not that kinda oceanic salvage vessel, or we scarper pronto.
:'''Cat''': To get diddled by a giant squid on a first date? Think how I'd feel in the morning!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, open the next one.
:'''Kryten''': Listen, whoever you are, don't push your luck by ordering whoever I am around, because almost certainly, whoever I am, I'm not the kind of guy who's gonna take any crap from whoever you are. So before you start ordering me around, let's establish if I'm the kind of guy who doesn't mind being ordered around or if I'm the kind of guy who gets all uptight about being ordered around by whatever the kind of guy you are.
:'''Rimmer''': All I said was open the next one.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': What the hell happened to my teeth? I could open beer bottles with my overbite!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': No, no! I don't want to be Duane Dibbley!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Duane Dibbley''': So this is really me? A no-style gimbo with teeth the Druids could use as a place of worship?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[Lister-Sebastian and Kryten-Jake see two propaganda posters]
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': [reading] &quot;Vote Fascist for a Third Glorious Decade of Total Law Enforcement&quot;?
:'''Jake Bullet''': [reading] &quot;Be a Government Informer. Betray Your Family &amp; Friends. Fabulous Prizes to be Won&quot;?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cop''': Halt or I will fire.
[a young child runs past across the car park]
:'''Cop''': [in pursuit] Move, Voters!
:'''Jake Bullet''': [Grabbing Billy Doyle-Rimmer] Move an inch and I'll crush every bone in your body.
:'''Cop''': You helped an enemy of Democracy escape. She was stealing an apple of the people.
:'''Jake Bullet''': [flashing ID] Bullet. Cybernautics.
:'''Cop''': That's traffic control. Kneel, Voters! You are under sentence of death.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cop''': [to Sebastian-Lister] Come out of the shadows, Voter.
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': What's the beef? Did she steal your lunch box?
:'''Cop''': M... mm... many apologies, Voter Colonel. Had I known it was you... [stands to attention and averts his gaze] forgive me.
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': You know me?
:'''Cop''': Of course, Voter Colonel.
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': Who am I?
:'''Cop''': You are Colonel Sebastian Doyle, Section Chief of CGI, Head of the Ministry of Alteration.
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': Remind me a little: what do we do at the Ministry of Alteration?
:'''Cop''': You... change people, Sir.
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': In what way?
:'''Cop''': You change them from being alive people, to being dead people. To purify Democracy.
:'''Billy Doyle''': Purify?
:'''Cop''': [proudly] No one has done more to purge the ballot boxes than the Voter Colonel.
:'''Duane Dibbley''': So why has he been away for 4 years then?
:'''Cop''': Excuse me, Voter Colonel, but is this some sort of test?
:'''Sebastian Doyle''': Answer him.
:'''Cop''': The rumour was that you had grown weary of your glorious duties and had gone away in secret to renew yourself.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': This is a nightmare! I'm on the run from the Fascist Police with a murderer, a mass murderer and a man in a Bri-Nylon shirt!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Cat''': We could all put our heads together and the bullet could go down the line!

== Red Dwarf: Series VI (1993) ==

=== ''Psirens'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': There, on the floor... P-S-I-R-E-N-S... &quot;Psirens?&quot;
:'''Kryten''': The poor sucker must have written it using a combination of his own blood, and even his own intestines.
:'''Rimmer''': But who would do that?
:'''Lister''': Someone who ''badly'' needed a pen.
:'''Cat''': What I wanna know is why he went to the trouble of using his own kidney as a full-stop.
:'''Rimmer''': I don't think he meant to do that. I think it just...plopped out.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[''Starbug'' is threatened by a giant rogue asteroid that could be a mere illusion.]''
:'''Kryten''': Suggest we maintain course. That asteroid does ''not'' exist.
:'''Rimmer''': Suppose you're wrong?
:'''Kryten''': Sir, I'll stake my reputation on it.
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, you haven't ''got'' a reputation.
:'''Kryten''': No, but I'm hoping to acquire one from this escapade.
''(after being proved correct)''
:'''Kryten''': Ahh, smug mode; Well, I can't stand around saving your necks all day, I guess I'll make a start on that ironing

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': There's an old cat proverb, &quot;It's better to live one hour as a tiger than a whole lifetime as a [[worm]].&quot;
:'''Rimmer''': There's an old human proverb, &quot;Whoever heard of a worm skin rug?&quot;

=== ''Legion'' ===
:'''Cat''': What the hell is all this down my chair? Peanuts?
:'''Lister''': No, I've been trimming my veruccas.
:'''Cat''': You have personal habits that would make a monkey blush.
:'''Lister''': You really think I'm that psychotically disgusting, don't you? They're peanuts, OK?
:'''Cat''': Real peanuts?
:'''Lister''': Yeah.
:'''Cat''': ''[eats the peanuts]'' Where'd you get them?
:'''Lister''': Derelict, couple of months back. I found them in the dead Captain's old donkey jacket.
:''[Cat glares at Lister, looking nauseous]''
:'''Lister''': Don't look at me like that. You enjoyed that Mint Imperial, didn't you?
:'''Cat''': Where'd you get that?
:'''Lister''': He was sucking that when he got shot! I had to prise his jaws open with a car jack.
:'''Cat''': You think I believe anything you say!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Sir, is it possible you could have made a mis-smelling?
:'''Cat''': Listen, butter-pat head! My nostril-hairs are vibrating faster than the springs on a Spaniard's honeymoon bed! I'm telling you, there's something out there!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': May I remind you of Space Corps Directive 34124?
:'''Kryten''': 34124? &quot;No officer with false teeth should attempt oral sex in zero-gravity&quot;?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Whatever it is, they clearly have a technology way in advance of our own!
:'''Lister''': So do the Albanian State Washing Machine Company.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Step up to Red Alert!
:'''Kryten''': Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb.
:'''Rimmer''': There's always some excuse, isn't there?!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Suggestions?
:'''Kryten''': Sir, may I recommend I load myself into the reverse-thrust tubes and you use my body as decoy fodder? This will of course leave me splattered across deep space and unable to complete today's laundry, for which I apologise in advance.
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, stop your blathering and get in the damn tube. ''[Kryten nods and stands up]''
:'''Lister''': Kryten, sit down! ''[Kryten sits back down]'' I'm not doing me own smegging ironing.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Open communication channels, Lister. Broadcast on all known frequencies and in all known languages, including Welsh. This is acting senior officer of the Jupiter Mining Corporation transport vessel StarBug. Now hear this. It's only coming once. We surrender, totally and without condition, thank you for listening. Oh, additional, sorry for taking your valuable time. Sorry, thank you, bye, sorry, thank you bye.
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, you got a longer yellow streak than a stampede of diacritic camels.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Wait a minute. Have anyone ever seen ''Revenge of the Surfboarding Killer Vampire Bikini Girls''?
:'''Kryten''': I think that one slipped us by, sir.
:'''Lister''': Well, there's this one scene, when the good-looking unconventional female journalist who wore glasses and a tight sweater was trapped, deep in the bottom of the Surfboarding Killer Vampire Bikini Girls' lair, and she came up with this ''award-winning'' escape plan.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': What - you're us? All four of us? Our combined minds and personalities, blended together?
:'''Legion''': Oh, but much more than that, exponentially more. The whole becomes far greater than the sum of its parts.
:'''Rimmer''': So we can't leave because you're us? You're created from us? If we leave, you cease to be.
:'''Legion''': Without you, my friends, I am quite literally nothing.
:'''Cat''': So if he's us, he can't hurt us, right?
''(Cat attempts to shimmy past Legion, who proves him wrong by knocking him the length of the table. Cat winds up in the lap of Lister, who is still sitting where Legion knocked him)''
:'''Cat''': Wrong.
:'''Kryten''': But this is insane. Hurting us is hurting yourself. Our pain is your pain.
:'''Legion''': Kryten, you forget: not only do I possess your combined intellects and memories, I also share the sum of your malice and rage and anger, magnified many times. I'm capable of quite insanely irrational behaviour. Watch.
''(Legion places his left hand flat on the table. He then takes the scalpel in his right hand, and stabs himself in the back of his hand. The others all react to the terrible pain that they, too, are now feeling)''
:'''Legion''': The next hint of insurrection, and the scalpel ends up...here ''(holding the scalpel to his scrotum).''
:'''Kryten''': Legion, that kind of tough talk doesn't scare us.
:'''Everyone else''': ''Yes, it does!''

=== ''Gunmen of the Apocalypse'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, she's a computer sprite. She's just a load of pixels.
:'''Lister''': Yeah, but what pixels.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': You're going to go with one of my plans? Are you nuts? What happens if we all get killed? I'll never hear the last of it.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Sir, I just can't eat anymore raw coffee.
:'''Lister''': Two more bowls.
:'''Kryten''': But I am sober, honest!
:'''Lister''': OK, who are you and why're you here?
:'''Kryten''': I'm some kind of robot who's fighting this virus, and none of this exists, it's all in a fever, except for you guys, who really ''do'' exist, only you're not really here, you're really on some space ship in the future.  Hell, if ''that's'' got to make sense I don't ''want'' to be sober!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Death''': Well, Sheriff, looks like it's just little old you.
:'''Kryten''': I'm not afraid, Mr Death, sir. My friends have bought enough time for me to complete the antidote program. So, if you'll forgive the confrontational imperative, ''go for your guns you scum-sucking molluscs!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Death''': We're gonna cut you up so small, the [[worms]] won't even have to chew!
:'''Rimmer''': You can't scare me, I'm a coward! I'm always scared!''

=== ''Emohawk: Polymorph II'' ===

:''[First lines of the episode; Rimmer is trying to get the sleeping Lister and Cat to take part in an emergency drill]''
:'''Rimmer''': SCRAMBLE! SCRAMBLE! ALL HANDS ON DECK! EMERGENCY DRILL! SCRAMBLE!
: (Lister and the Cat are still asleep)
:'''Rimmer''': Er, perhaps you didn't quite catch that - I said SCRAMBLE!
:'''Lister''': ''[sleepily]'' Yeah, that'll be great with bacon and beans, man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': CHANGE OF PLAN! LEG IIIIIITTTTT!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''':(''after the Emohawk drains his &quot;cool&quot;'') Look what it did to me! It's turned me into Duane Dibbley — the Duke of Dork.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[While looking for the Emohawk]''
:'''Kryten''': According to the psi-scan, it's somewhere in this location.
:'''Lister''': It's the barrel! ''[shoots at the barrel]'' Sorry. False alarm. That chain, it's moving! ''[shoots chain]'' Sorry. Sorry.
:'''Kryten''': Sir, try and remain calm. You're experiencing a classic knee-jerk, paranoid reaction to a terror situation. It's essential at this time that we - IT'S THE WALL! ''[shoots the wall]'' Shame overload. I... I... I sorry.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Probe Droid has locked onto Starbug. They just dodged 2 shots.]''
:'''Rimmer''': We've lost it.
:''[Explosion from the back.]''
:'''Rimmer''': Sorry, I was looking at the wrong panel.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Damage report?
:'''Cat''': It's bad, bud. Looks like Starbug's been hit!
:'''Rimmer''': Details, halibut breath!
:'''Cat''': Well, according to the damage report machine, there's several small fires, lots of smoke and the navicom's fizzing.
:''[Explosion from in front of Cat]''
:'''Cat''': Oh, damn! Now the damage report machine's exploded!

=== ''Rimmerworld'' ===

:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, kindly get to the point, before I jam your nose between your cheeks and make it the filling of a buttock sandwich.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': In which case we can remove him from duty as per Space Corps Directive 196156.
:'''Kryten''': 196156? Any officer caught sniffing the saddle of the exercise bicycle in the women's gym will be discharged without trial? Hmm. I'm sorry, sir, that doesn't quite get to the nub of the matter for me. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': I'm a competitive man, Kryten. Always have been. That's what makes me what I am.
:'''Kryten''': We're all perfectly well aware of what you are, sir.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Rogue Simulants always carry large stocks of food supply in order to prolong the torment of their torture victims. In some cases, they've kept subjects alive for 40 years in a state of perpetual agony.
:'''Rimmer''': If we wanted to live in a state of perpetual agony, we'd let Lister play his guitar.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': There's an old cat saying: &quot;If you're gonna eat tuna, expect bones.&quot;
:'''Rimmer''': There's an old human saying: &quot;If you're gonna talk garbage, expect pain.&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': ''[deciding on whether or not to go into an abandoned Rogue Simulant ship and get food]'' Kryten, what's for dinner?
:'''Kryten''': Tonight, sir, asteroid lichen stew followed by dandelion sorbet.
:'''Lister''': We're going in.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': [to Lister] Sir, are you really saying you would rather have a psychopathic mechanical killer rip off your skull and play your frontal lobes like a xylophone than have another bowl of my nourishing space nettle soup?
:'''Cat''': Buddy, I'd hand him the sticks and hold up the sheet music!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': ''[to a Rogue Simulant]'' There's one thing you should know. Last time we met I was wearing a cute little black number with peach trim and gold spangles, and although it looks like I'm wearing the same outfit today, it is in fact an entirely different cute little black number, with completely different gold spangles!
:'''Kryten''': That was an important speech, sir, and it needed to be made. Might I suggest, however, that the rest of this discourse is continued by those with brains larger than a grape?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': All in all, a 100% successful trip!
:'''Kryten''': But, sir, we lost Mr. Rimmer.
:'''Cat''': All in all, a 100% successful trip!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': My escape plan worked then?
:'''Cat''': What escape plan?
:'''Rimmer''': The valiant plan whereby I set off the disintegration of the ship's hull by bravely leaping into the escape pod, thereby creating a diversion, so you could...''(pauses)'' Actually, how ''did'' you escape?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Rimmer's in deep trouble]''
:'''Cat''': You know, there's an old cat saying. But you don't wanna hear it right now.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Kryten has given Rimmer a set of Chinese worry balls to help him cope with his stress-related nerve disorder]''
:'''Kryten''': Please, sir, don't panic.
:'''Rimmer''': It's not panic, it's a full blown hysterical fit.
:'''Kryten''': Grind those balls, sir. Grind them!
:'''Rimmer''': So let me get this straight. If we board that ship and get captured, we're finished. However, if we board that ship, don't get captured, but the superstructure disintegrates around us, we're finished. On the other hand, if we board that ship, don't get captured and the superstructure doesn't disintegrate around us, but we can't find any fuel, we are in fact finished?
:'''Lister''': That's about the shape of it, yeah.
:'''Kryten''': After you with the balls, sir...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': Either Mr. Rimmer had the incredibly good fortune to land on a populated planet.... Or.....
:'''Cat''': ...Or what?.
:'''Kryten''': It's too hideous to contemplate!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Lister, Kryten and the Cat are surrounded by a group of bad Rimmers in Rimmerworld]''
:'''Lister''': This might sound like a bit of a corny line, but... I can't bring myself to say it.
:'''Rimmer''': Say what?
:'''Lister''': Take us to your leader.
:'''Kryten''': Sir, how could you?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Dear lord, what has created such foulness? Is it the product of a marriage twixt woman and gerbil?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Enough of this heresy. At the stroke of dawn take them out and kill them. And when you've killed them, burn the bodies, then bring me the cold ashes on a silver plate with a glass of chilled sancerre.
:'''Cat''': This guy's an animal. Doesn't he know it's red wine with cold ashes?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': There's got to be a way out. There hasn't been a prison built that could hold Derek Custer. Why don't we scrape away this mortar here, slide one of these bricks out, then using a rope weaved from strands of this hessian, rig up a kind of a pulley system so that when a guard comes in, using it as a trip wire, gets laid out, and we put Rimmer in the guard's uniform, he leads us out, we steal some swords, and fight our way back to the bug?
:'''Kryten''': Or we could use the teleporter.
:'''Lister''': Or in a pinch, we could use the teleporter.

=== ''Out of Time'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': It can't have gone unnoticed that morale is at an all-time low. We've lost all trace of Red Dwarf, and supplies are low. So I have decided to appoint myself morale officer, and set myself the task of raising morale all round. Now I thought it would productive if we all met once a week and had a coffee or a beer — whatever's your poison — and get any troubles we may have off our chests. Any objections? ''[The others mutter agreement.]'' Well, as it's week one, why don't I start? You know what it is about Lister that really makes me want to puke? That really makes me want to stab him in both eyes with an ice pick? Everything, that's what. Especially his god-awful, chirpy, gerbil-faced optimism. And, as for the Cat — what an unbelievable git. And Kryten — if he doesn't change pronto, I swear I'll attach jump leads to his nipple nuts and fry him like a Cajun catfish. Well, that's cleared the air. I don't know about you, but I certainly feel better. Thank for your contributions, gentlemen. See you at next week's morale meeting. Marvellous. ''[Exits]''
:'''Lister''': Good meeting.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Dwarfers acquire a time travel device, testing it out by sending the ship to the year 1421]''
:'''Rimmer''': Give us visual. Let's see what it's like out there.
:'''Lister''': Okay, punching it up.
:''[They see nothing but empty space]''
:'''Lister''': Hey, I don't get it! We're still where we were!
:'''Kryten''': Of course. We're still in deep space, sir, only now we're in deep space in the 15th century. Isn't it wonderful?
:'''Rimmer''': So we're still three million years away from Earth?
:'''Kryten''': Well, yes.
:'''Lister''': ''[sighs]'' Taking her back to the present.
:'''Kryten''': Keyed in. Engage.
:''[They go forward in time]''
:'''Rimmer''': So forgive me if I'm being thicker than the offspring of a village idiot and a TV weather girl, but what was the point of that little exercise? Fun though it was, drinking in the heady medieval atmosphere of pre-Renaissance deep space, the drive is next to useless, yes?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''(After discovering Lister is now just a brain in a jar with fake dreadlocks)''
:'''Rimmer''': Ohhhhhh dear!
:'''Cat''': What? Is he fat?
:'''Rimmer''': Far from it, he's lost a bit of weight, actually. In fact, he's lost quite a bit of everything.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': So what do we do?
:'''Rimmer''': Have we got any chance of winning?
:'''Kryten''': Their craft is greatly upgraded. We have no chance whatsoever.
:'''Rimmer''': Then I say fight! ''(dramatic chord of music)''
:'''Kryten''' ''(astounded)'': Mr. Rimmer?
:'''Rimmer''': Better dead than smeg!
:'''Lister''': Ye-es! Cat?
:'''Cat''': Better dead than sofa-size butt!
:'''Lister''': Kryten?
:'''Kryten''': Better ''anything'' than that toupee!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': But there may be...
:''[An explosion sends Kryten flying. Rimmer, now the sole survivor, goes towards him in shock]''
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten...? Kryten?! There may be a what? A way out of this? Is that what you were gonna say? Sp... speak, Kryten! How can we change what's happening?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[From the last scene not shown in the final cut]''
:'''Lister''': They aren't margaritas, that's urine recyc!

== Red Dwarf: Series VII (1997) ==

=== ''Tikka To Ride'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': Do you think it's because the subspace conduits have locked with the transponder calibrations and caused a major tachyon surge that has overloaded the time matrix?
:'''Kryten''': Ah, no, sir. I've just been jabbing it too hard.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': How come you need more memory? Over the years you've had more RAM than a field of sheep!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': (after his guilt chip is removed) Just call me badass!

=== ''Stoke Me a Clipper'' ===
:'''Ace''': You can't judge a book by its cover.
:'''Lister''': And you can't confuse Rimmer with a book. For a start, a book's got a spine.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ace''': Princess Bonjella? Ace Rimmer. There'll be time for explanations later and, hopefully, some sex.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Rimmer, don't take this the wrong way, but how could you be the next Ace? I mean, you're a gutless, spineless, gormless, directionless, neurotic, underachieving, snivelling, cowardly pile of smeg. No offence. But, get real, man. Most eunuchs have got more balls than you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Are you my faithful man servant or what?
:'''Kryten''': I'm ashamed to be with you, sir. I haven't been this embarrassed since I was loosening my adjustment screws, and my entire groinal box dropped into Mr Rimmer's soup.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''AR medieval King''': Good Knight, bring me this knave's head on a silver platter.
:'''Lister (of Smeg)''': Hey, steady!
:'''AR medieval King''': Then disembowel him and feed his innards to the crows.
crowd cheers
:'''Lister (of Smeg)''': This is worse than playing away at Leeds.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''(New) Ace''': Stoke me a clipper, I'll be back for Christmas.

=== ''Ouroboros'' ===
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': Rimmer?
:'''Rimmer''': Yes, ma'am?
:'''Kochanski''': Have sex with someone, and that's an order.
:'''Rimmer''': Yes, ma'am. Right away, ma'am.
:'''Lister''': [Hands him a card] Here, phone this number. Say I sent ya. Tell her it's an emergency.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[Lister's old girlfriend has turned up from a parallel dimension]
:'''Kryten''': [to Lister] We've lost sight of Miss Kochanski's ship, sir. And we're fast running out of time.
:'''Lister''': Yeah, it's good, isn't it?
:'''Kryten''': No sir, I don't believe it is.
:'''Lister''': Why? Don't you like her?
:'''Kryten''': I'm a mere mechanoid, sir. It's hardly my place to point out what a bossy old trollop she is.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': I'm going to end up on my own again, just like I did on the Nova 5.
:'''Lister''': You killed the crew, Kryten! No wonder you were left on your own! All right, it was an accident, but nonetheless!
:'''Kryten''': But what about before that? It was the same on the SS Augustus!
:'''Lister''': Well, they died of old age!
:'''Kryten''': You see?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': You're not good enough for him. That's all. OK, he may walk around smelling like a Balti House laundry basket, but he doesn't need the likes of you swapping dimensions like there's no tomorrow and bewitching him with your... in and out bits. Pointy and unnecessary.
:'''Kochanski''': You've got big problems, you know that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
(after Lister impales Kochanski with a harpoon in attempting to rescue her from 'non-space'.)
:'''Kryten''': It's an obscene phone call, sir. I think it's for you.

=== ''Duct Soup'' ===
:'''Lister''': To pee or not to pee, that is the question.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': One more time.. And you get this, d'you hear? Don't think I don't mean it. One more time, just one more..

(Nureek!)

(CLANG, CLANG, CLANG)

:'''Kochanski''': What did I tell you, I told you.. Didn't I tell you? How many times have I told you? Right... What was the last one? Nureek, so the next one will be a Rutut, then the one after that will be a Hununger.. Four Seconds, Three Seconds Two Seconds...

(Rutut)

(CLANG)
:'''Kochanski''': Now Hununger.

(Nureek)

:'''Kochanski''': No that's wrong? You've gone out of sequence! Nureek, Rutut, Hununger! What wrong with you!

(CLANG, CLANG, CLANG!)

:'''Kochanski''': If you're gonna keep me up all night, just do it right okay!

(Squeelookle)

:'''Kochanski''': Squeelookle? Where did squeelookle come from? He's New!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
Kryten: Oh my goodness, it's Princess Leia. Mr Skywalker went that way mam.

:'''Kochanski''': What?!

Kryten: It's nearly 1am mam, what are you doing up?

:'''Kochanski''': Looking for someone to kill, care to volunteer?

Kryten: Oh.. can't sleep?

:'''Kochanski''': Have you ever listened to those clapped out old pipes? Nureeking, then Rututting and just when you're expecting them to nureek again, they squeelookle! It's enough to make a perfectly sane person crazy!!

Krysten: It's quite amazing the number of people those pipes have driven to very brink of psychosis. Mr Lister spent the night in there once and he ended up trying to suffocate himself to death with an onion sandwich.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': How did I end up like this, on a ship where the fourth most popular pastime is going down to the laundry room and watching my knickers spin dry?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

:'''Lister''': I AM NOT HAVING A GOOD DAY!!!

=== ''Blue'' ===
:''[Lyrics to the ''The Rimmer Song'' in The Rimmer Experience:]''
:''He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer,''
:''More reliable than a garden [[w:String trimmer|strimmer]],''
:''He's never been mistaken for [[w:Yul Brynner|Yul Brynner]];''
:''He's not bald, and his head doesn't glimmer.''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''Master of the wit and the repartee,''
:''His command of space directives is uncanny.''
:''How come he's such a genius? Don't ask me!''
:''Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer.''
:''He's also a fantastic swimmer,''
:''And if you play your cards right,''
:''Then he just might come round for dinner.''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': [about Kochanski] And another thing is that she keeps her pants in her sock drawer! Do you know how time-consuming that can be to put it all back?
:'''Cat''': You mean you've seen her pants?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': Do you think I like living in this big skip with thrusters? Do you think I even enjoy breathing in on this ship?! And to top it all off, I am faced with a neurotic droid who is completely obsessed with my pants drawer!
:'''Kryten''': You mean I'm not alone? Oh, I see. You mean me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': I'm losing it, man, otherwise I'd never be thinking stuff like that. Kissing Rimmer? I'd rather be bobbing for apples at the Reading festival!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': [about Rimmer] I never wanna see or hear from that scum sucking, lying, weasel minded smeghead in my entire life.
:'''Kryten''': Sigmund Freud, eat your heart out.

=== ''Beyond A Joke'' ===

''[Kryten has invaded Kochanski's &quot;Pride and Prejudice&quot; VR game with a tank]''
:'''Kryten''': Perhaps I didn't make myself clear. I said supper is ready! ''(He fires, completely destroying the gazebo)'' Is anyone ''still'' unclear as to the supper situation? No? Excellent!
:'''Lister''': Didn't know robots got PMT!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': It's nice, Kryts, really nice.
:'''Kochanski''': It's really great!
:'''Lister''': In fact it's better than nice, it's fantastic!
:'''Kochanski''': Isn't it great!
:'''Lister''': It's really great!
:'''Kochanski''': It's really really great!
:'''Cat''': Are we eating the same stuff?
:'''Kryten''': I don't know why I make the effort? No one appreciates the hours I put into food prep. My fingers are practically worn down to the exoskeleton!
:'''Lister''': Is there any Ketchup?
:'''Kryten''': Any what?!
:'''Lister''': Ketchup, I thought it could do with a bit of ketchup, just a dollop...
:'''Lister''': Ketchup?!
:'''Kochanski''': Oh my god..
:'''Kryten''': You want Ketchup?!
:'''Lister''': Emmm... Brown not tomato, Brown. It's not like I've got no class?
:'''Kryten''': With Lobster? You want brown ketchup?!
:'''Lister''': It's really nice Kryts, but you know me. I just thought it could do with a bit of a pep up...
:'''Kryten''': I can't believe it... I simply cannot B...! ''(His head explodes)''
:'''Cat''': Oh well done bud! Now we'll have to do the washing up.
:'''Kochanski''': He's literally blown his top. Cat, can you go and get a spare head?
:'''Cat''': How come I have to do everything around here? I can't get a second to myself. Cat do this, Cat do that. What am I, a dog?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': Let's at least ask someone who's at least going to give us a slightly more intelligent opinion. Hello, wall! What do ''you'' think?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': &quot;Cat do this!&quot; &quot;Cat do that!&quot; What am I? A dog?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': [about Kryten, whose head had just blown up] Life without a head. That's gonna seriously put a real crimp on his lifestyle. What can he do without a head?
:'''Lister''': Apart from being you, hardly anything.

=== ''Epideme'' ===
:''[The crew discusses a plan to remove Lister's arm to save his life.]''
:'''Lister''': Can you ''explain'' it to me? Something a bit more confidence-stirring than &quot;Can I hack off your limb?&quot;
:'''Kryten''': The plan is to inject antivirals in a precise pattern through your body, forcing epideme into your arm.
:'''Lister''': And then you cut it off. Great plan. What choice have I got?... Okay, but make it my left arm, okay. 'Cause my right arm does all my favourite things.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': I take it we're speaking with the Epideme virus?
:'''Epideme''': Give that man an eyebrow! Hey, I'm feeling generous — give him two!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': You absorb knowledge from every person you kill?
:'''Epideme''': So you can appreciate killing you ain't exactly a career highlight. No offence, but when you're a virus, there ain't much call for knowing how to open a lager bottle with your anus.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
Lister wakes up afer the crew cut off his arm to discover that is right arm has been cut off
:'''Kochanski''': Hi. I'm so sorry.
:'''Lister''': My left arm I said. Thats my right. What kind of Navigation Officer can't tell left from right?
Kryten and Cat enter
:'''Kryten''': Sir, you're awake!
:'''Cat''': Buddy, you look great! (Puts out hand to shake Lister's before realising he put his right hand out)
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': (Disgusted by all the corpses on the Leviathan) I've never seen anything like this!
:'''Lister''': You weren't around for my last party, were ya?

=== ''Nanarchy'' ===
:'''Kryten:''' (''narrating'') Last week, on Red Dwarf... something terrible happened to Mr. Lister's arm!
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

:'''Lister''': But does it change anything?
:'''Kochanski''': Listen, having only one arm will make no difference to any woman that cares about you.
:'''Lister''': What about sex?
:'''Kochanski''': Not here, it's too sandy.

== Red Dwarf: Series VIII (1999) ==

=== ''Back in the Red I'' ===
:'''Cat''': Forget Red — let's go all the way up to Brown Alert!
:'''Kryten''': There's no such thing as a Brown Alert, sir.
:'''Cat''': You won't be saying that in a minute! And don't say I didn't alert you!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after Starbug lodges itself in the back end of a super enlarged rat on the nanobot rebuilt Red Dwarf]''
:'''Holly''': Hope we don't get stopped by the cops, they don't like it when you're rat arsed.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Hey guys, look at me body.
:'''Cat''': Now there is an invitation that will NOT cause a stampede.

=== ''Back in the Red II'' ===
:'''Captain Hollister''': Rimmer, is this salute ever going to end? Do I have time to go for a cup of coffee? Maybe go on vacation?
:'''Rimmer''': Nearly finished, sir. This is my very special extra long salute I reserve for the especially important, sir.

=== ''Back in the Red III'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': One day in this lousy, stinking penal colony and I'm cracking up. Everyone's so deranged and brutal, it's frightening. This afternoon I was so depressed I went to see the social worker.
:'''Lister''': Was he any help?
:'''Rimmer''': Not really; he beat me up. He said I was a whining nancy-boy with girlie white legs, then pummelled me repeatedly with his book, ''Showing Compassion to Inmates''.
:'''Lister''': I thought social workers were supposed to be nice?
:'''Rimmer''': In the end I was so shell-shocked I went to see the priest and explained everything.
:'''Lister''': What did he say?
:'''Rimmer''': He said I was a whining baby who was missing his mum. Then he beat me up, too. You can still see the crucifix marks in the back of my head.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Captain Hollister''': I also suspect that someone, possibly Lister, has given Rimmer access to the crew's confidential files, and he's using this information to blackmail his way up the chain of command. It's sickening. It's unforgivable. But it's a technique that can work. I should know; I used the same method myself to become captain. If the crew discover I'm really just Dennis the Doughnut Boy, I'm finished.

=== ''Cassandra'' ===
:'''Lister:''' Have you figured a way to get us out of here, Hol?
:'''Holly:''' I have actually, Dave. I've devoted all my run-time to looking for a loop-hole in the prison regs. I think I've come up with something that means you can serve your entire two-year sentence in just fourteen weeks.
:'''Lister:''' Ah, Brilliant! What have I got to do?
:'''Holly:''' Become a dog.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''' ''[about their two-year prison sentence]'': It's only two years; what, with good behaviour, it'll probably only be eighteen months. Remember when you were first born, then you were eighteen months? The time just flashed past!
:'''Rimmer''': It flashed past because you had two breasts big as your head at your beck and call day and night! Give me that now and I wouldn't be whinging.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lister has signed up for the Canaries]''
:'''Lister:''' What have I signed up for?
:'''Rimmer:''' In the 19th century, when miners went down a pit: they'd lower a canary down first, in a little cage. ''[...]'' And if the atmosphere was noxious, as it frequently was, guess what the canary did?
:'''Lister:''' Complained to the Foreman?
:'''Rimmer:''' It died, Listy! ''[Lister burys his face in the table and starts hitting himself in the back of his head]'' The canary's job was to go into the most dangerous, unpleasant and most smeggy situations and see if it could stay alive. Then they'd know if it was safe to send in the important people.
:'''Lister''': I'm gonna kill him!
:'''Rimmer''': How come you've never heard of the Canaries? They've got recruitment posters all over the men's bogs! How come you've not seen them?
:'''Lister:''' When I'm in the men's toilets in prison, Rimmer, I tend not to look around; d'yknow what I'm saying? It's like playing golf; I concentrate on my grip, keep my eye on the ball and try not to veer off to the side!
:'''Rimmer:''' The Canaries! You know what they say it's supposed to stand for? Convict Army, Nearly All Retarded Inbred Evil Sheepshaggers! They haven't got an X chromosone to share between them!
:'''Lister:''' Smeg. It gets worse as well.
:'''Rimmer:''' (''laughing'') Worse! Go on!
:'''Lister:''' I've signed you up too. I forged your signature. I signed everyone up! Cat, Kryten, Kris...
:'''Rimmer:''' No way. No way am I becoming a Canary!
:'''Lister:''' (''part from a deleted scene'') Too late, tweety-pie, there's your I.D badge and uniform!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Captain Hollster:''' ''[Briefing the Canaries]'' We've located a ship, the SS Silverberg, buried at the bottom of an ocean moon. A remote probe has come back with no signs of a crew; no bodily remains, no skeletons, zip. we want you guys to go on board and find out why. ''[...]'' It's inconcievable a ship like this could be sent out without a crew. So whatever devoured the crew, bones and all, might still be there so... be careful.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cassandra:''' All the Canaries will be dead within one hour, except for Rimmer —
:'''Rimmer:''' YES! ''[punches the air]''
:'''Cassandra:''' — who will be dead in twenty minutes.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister:''' If the future is all worked out, horoscopes all that stuff . . . It means we're not responsible for any thing we do. It means we're just actors sayings lines in a script written by somebody else. I don't want to believe that. I want to believe I'm in charge of me own life. Me own destiny.

=== ''Krytie TV'' ===
:''[Rimmer is reading a letter to Lister from Peterson]]''
:'''Rimmer''': My God, that is tragic.
:'''Lister''': Why, what's happened to him? Has he died?
:'''Rimmer''': Died?? You'd think he'd write and tell you?
:'''Lister''': No, you're right, man, I'm not thinking straight. He'd be to busy organising his funeral wouldn't he? What's happened to him?
:'''Rimmer''': Somthing catastrophic. Hideous. He's found your guitar in Starbug's wreckage and is sending it here.
:'''Lister''': Brilliant!
:''[Rimmer is looking stressed]''
:'''Lister''': You OK?
:'''Rimmer''': Of cause I'm not OK. I hate your guitar. If I wanted to share a cell with an irritating lump of wood, I'd have moved in with an Australian soap star!
:'''Lister''': I didn't think you thought I was THAT bad.
:'''Rimmer''': Didn't you get a clue that time I tried to insert it in you?
:'''Lister''': You would've had a better chance if you started with the neck end.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[''Lister and Rimmer plan to leave after seeing Krytie TV's &quot;Ladies Shower Night,&quot; fearing it could damage their appeal'']
:'''Rimmer''': I want no part of this.
:'''Lister''': Me neither.
:'''Rimmer''': We've gotta go.
:'''Lister''': Right now.
:'''Rimmer''': Not a minute to lose.
:'''Lister''': I'm dust.
:'''Rimmer''': Me too. After two. One, two, go!
:[''They still sit there, moving their heads sideways, while watching the feature.'']
:'''Kryten''': And now, I'm going to stare at a cracked floor tile. [''He does so. The other inmates yell in displeasure.'']
:'''Kill Crazy''': What's he doing that for?!
:'''Kryten''': Remember: Shower Night is a Pay-Per-View event. Start filling those buckets!
:[''Men in &quot;Krytie TV&quot; t-shirts approach the inmates with buckets. The inmates put cans of beer, cigarettes and other items in the buckets.'']
:'''Rimmer''': I don't believe this! He's running it like a business! There's even a bloke there selling ice creams!
:'''Lister''': Never mind him. Now. We got to go RIGHT NOW.
:'''Rimmer''': I'm going, I'm going.
:'''Kryten''': And now, I'm going to get close and personal with one of the showers, Miss Kristine Kochanski!
:[''Rimmer and Lister stop as soon as they hear this and slowly turn round.'']
:'''Rimmer''': Fancy a choc-ice?
:[''They sit down. Lister pushes another inmate's head out the way.'']
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': First, we sabotage the date.
:'''Lister''': What, &quot;we&quot;? You mean you're gonna help me?
:'''Kryten''': Step on board the &quot;love express,&quot; sir! Now, we get to his quarters through the air vents; I've paid off the guards. Then you make him look like the nerdiest slob in the entire universe. This is what you leave in his quarters. A half-eaten onion sandwich. That's always a passion-killer.
:'''Lister''': Is it? I like those.
:'''Kryten''': Then there's this: &quot;Morris Dancer Monthly.&quot; What a total dweebo nerdmeister he'll look with those!
:'''Rimmer''': They're mine!
:'''Kryten''': And then there's these: tragically unfashionable underpants.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[exasperated]'' They're mine!
:'''Kryten''': And finally: Christian rock music. If that doesn't scare her off, nothing will.
:'''Rimmer''': Have you been going through my things?

=== ''Pete I'' ===
:'''Lister''': I was trying to get a sick note, but the doc thought I was faking and didn't accept it was possible to get athlete's hand.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

:'''Hollister''': Seven hours. Do you know how long that is? I couldn't remove my shorts until after midnight. When I wanted a leak I had to do a handstand on the toilet seat. I stopped the lift doors from closing, I wasn't even catching a lift!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

=== ''Pete II'' ===
:'''Lister''': Hol: need some advice, mate. We've been cornered by a T-Rex that was formerly a sparrow, and the only thing that can turn it back into Woody Woodpecker is in its stomach. What's your take on the situation?
:'''Holly''': What do you want — the long or the short version?
:'''Lister''': Oh. Long.
:'''Holly''': You're finished.
:'''Cat''': What's the short version?
:'''Holly''': Bye.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kochanski''': Kryten, do you realise what this means?
:'''Kryten''': No, ma'am.
:'''Kochanski''': It means you're a real man.
:'''Kryten''': It does? Why?
:'''Kochanski''': Because now, like all men, you have absolutely no control over your penis.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(Both Birdman and Pete have been restored to their former selves)''
:'''Rimmer''': Now, destroy the time wand.
:'''Lister''': This machine's priceless!
:'''Rimmer''': Destroy it.
:''[Lister destroys the time wand. Moments later, a giant dinosaur egg is discovered behind a corner.]''
:'''Lister''': Wh-what do we do now??
:'''Rimmer''': Now...rebuild...the time wand! It's absolutely priceless!

=== ''Only the Good...'' ===
:'''[[w:Grim_reaper|Death]]''': Arnold Judas Rimmer, your life is over. Come with me. You will travel to the River Styx, where you will place a coin and —
:'''Rimmer''': Not today, matey. ''[knees Death in the groin]'' Remember, only the ''good'' die young.
:'''Death''': ''[gasping]'' That's never happened to me before.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Why don't you smegging well smeg off, you annoying little smeggy smegging smegger?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''Rimmer is trying to identify a chemical in the mirror universe''
:'''Rimmer''': Can you tell me what this is?
:'''Mirror Cat''': (''smells it'') It's an alkali.
:'''Rimmer''': Oh yes, what's it called?
:'''Mirror Cat''': Cesiumfrancolithicmyxialobidiumrixidixidoxidexidroxhide. You look surprised?
:'''Rimmer''': I never thought I'd ever hear you say that. Can you write it down for me?
:'''Mirror Cat''': Certainly. (''To Mirror Kochanski'') Could I have an extremely ''long'' piece of paper, my dear?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr Ackerman''': You're drunk.
:'''Lister''': Drunk shir? No, sir.
:'''Rimmer''': No. No. No.
:'''Mr Ackerman''': Who fancies a kebab?
:'''Rimmer and Lister together ''': Oh yeah!
:'''Lister''': Smeg! He's tricked us. (Rimmer collapses) Must've been the cherry trifle we had for lunch sir. Told him not to go back for seconds. (Snores)
:'''Mr Ackerman''': Call the medi bay. we need two stomach pumps. Super suck.

== Red Dwarf: Back to Earth (2009)==
=== Part One ===
:'''Cat''': I'm walking through the cargo deck, right? Minding my own damn business. When all of a sudden, you know that big tank on G deck?
:'''Lister''': He means the water tank.
:'''Cat''': Suddenly there is a disturbance on the surface of the tank and this massive testicle shoots out of the water and grabs me by the throat.
:'''Lister''': He means tentacle.
:'''Rimmer''': I hope so.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': You were supposed to be manning the sonar, Rimmer! You could have gotten us all killed!
:'''Rimmer''': Is this about you again? It is, isn't it? Can't you see right now I need some ''me'' time? My heart is still hammering. I don't know how I got through that.
:'''Lister''': You wasn't even there!
:'''Rimmer''': I was nearly there. That's close enough for me.

=== Part Two ===
:'''Katerina''': Something is not right! It's saying we don't exist! How can this be possible? &quot;Taking to nearest valid reality&quot;. Makes no sense at all.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Katerina''': You think you outsmart me, yes? But you don't, I here. Cut a second hole.
:'''Rimmer''': Science officer, excellent. So pleased you've caught up with us.
:'''Katerina''': You gave me slip, I know. You not want to be erased. But you won't defeat me, I too smart.
:'''Rimmer''': Erase me? I thought it was murder to kill a hologram.
:'''Katerina''': No, hologram already dead. Morally, ethically, hologram killing fine!
:'''Rimmer''': Fair enough. [''Rimmer suddenly pushes her into oncoming traffic, and her image shorts out''] Come on, we haven't got all day.
:'''Kryten''': She didn't see that coming, did she? I did.

=== Part Three ===
:'''Lister''': (About Craig Charles, his actor) I'm so glad I'm not him. The guy's a wreck. And pretending to be someone else all day, that's no way to make a living. Smeghead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''Driving with Kochanski, Lister stops Carbug abruptly and walks into woods''
:'''Hallucination Kochanski''': Where are you going?
:'''Lister''': I have to leave and get you back.
:'''Hallucination Kochanski''': The real me? You'll never get me, I'm way out of your league!
:'''Lister''': I thought that too, but I was wrong.
:'''Hallucination Kochanski''': You were right.
:'''Lister''': Nah, I'm pretty cool. I don't take any smeg. And even though I'm disgusting, sometimes I can be quite brave.
:'''Hallucination Kochanski''': You'll never get me.
:'''Lister''': Yeah, I will.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Whats going to happen to everybody in the reality we left? The guys all watching us on T.V?
:'''Kryten''': Well, they will continue to exist as a consequence of us creating them in our hallucination, sir. Its quantum mechanics, every decision that is made creates a new universe, as do all dreams and hallucinations, its multi-verse 1.0.1.
:'''Rimmer''': But those sad suckers will live out the rest of their lives convinced they're the real ones and we are characters from a T.V show.
:'''Lister''': And you know if you tell them the truth, you know what they would probably do?
:'''Rimmer''': Laugh.
:'''Lister''': Yeah. [''They all snigger''] They probably would.

== Red Dwarf: Series X (2012)==
===''Trojan''===
:'''Lister:''' No the moose aren't in the cars, antlers out the sun roof! They're in the roads, mooseing about, crossing roads, causing accidents!&lt;br /&gt;'''Cat:''' You mean they're not looking left and right?&lt;br /&gt;'''Lister:''' Exactly.&lt;br /&gt;'''Cat:''' Not using the pedestrian crossings?&lt;br /&gt;'''Lister:''' Exactly!&lt;br /&gt;'''Cat:''' Not paying attention as to whether it's a little green man or a little red man? Of course they're not, they're mooses!! Jeez... Swedes: they expect too much!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' Kryten, you have a real gift. You make things that are really, really complicated sound really, really complicated.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' Are you saying I am a resentful person? I really resent that!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Howard:''' And you rebuilt him - gave him something to live for.&lt;br /&gt;'''Rimmer:''' No, we just hosed him down and gave him a hat.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[upon reading the results of his latest Astro Navigation exam and fully expecting to fail]'' CAN YOU NEVER EVER SUCCEED AT ANYTHING, YOU USELESS RANCID CANCEROUS SACK OF SICK?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[explaining a [[lateral thinking]] question.]'' 'It's 1971, a Swedish man crashes into a tree, what causes the accident?' There's nothing medical, nothing wrong with the car.
:'''Lister''': ''[deadpan.]'' Riiiight, so, um, this Swedish guy drives into a tree, what caused the accident.... Answer's in the back, right?
:'''Rimmer''': Right.
:'''Lister''': ''[milking it.]'' Well... That's a really hard one, that. I mean, probably gotta be pretty damn smart to get a question like that right. You know what, I'm gonna go for a moose.
:'''Rimmer''': A moose?! ''[scoffs.]''
:'''Lister''': Yeah, it was in the road, he swerved to avoid the moose.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[checking.]'' Are you insane? That's never gonna be - it's a moose.
:'''Lister''': ''[wandering out.]'' Sometimes life is good.
:'''Kryten''': Ah, sir, you asked me to remind you, it's ten minutes til your exam-
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten, [[lateral thinking]] question, just got it myself. It's 1971, a Swedish man drives into a tree, what causes the accident?
:'''Kryten''': Well, it's a moose, sir, he swerves and hits a tree.
:'''Rimmer''': Is it me? How did you get that?
:'''Cat''': Get what?
:'''Rimmmer''': I've got something for you. A lateral thinking question.
:'''Cat''': A lottery what?
:'''Rimmer''': Ahhh, I knew I could rely on you. What caused this accident?
:'''Cat''': ''[alert.]'' What accident?
:'''Rimmer''': No, no. It's a question, alright? Are you ready? It's 1971, a man-
:'''Cat''': Was he Swedish?
:'''Rimmer''': ... Yes?
:'''Cat''': A moose! ''[Rimmer sags in resignation.]'' ''It was a moose!'' He swerved to avoid it, and hit a tree! Oh, and the moose is on the road, by the way - not in the car driving. ''Oww! Yea-ah!'' ''[dances out of the room.]'' ''Oww! Yea-ah!''

===''Fathers &amp; Suns''===
:'''Lister:''' Who needs a denti-bot anyway, man? Half a bottle of GELF hooch, can't feel a thing now...anywhere. Starting to worry, actually.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' So now we don’t have that [[conversation]] and move straight onto the next conversation?
:'''Pree:''' Your next conversation is a conversation about not having the previous conversation, saying you were looking forward to the previous conversation, and now feel a bit lost not having had that conversation. You conclude that you will probably get used to hearing the results of your conversations and no longer having the conversations yourselves.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister Jr:''' What the [[:wikipedia:Smeg (vulgarism)|smeg]]?
:'''Lister Sr:''' Don't swear!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pree:''' I watched them all yesterday and you did not enjoy them.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' You knew that I was going to cock this up, so you cocked it up for me?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' That's not a man, that's Lister!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pree:''' Mindful of the Space Pollution Act, JMC policy dictates the ship should dispose of itself by flying straight into the nearest sun.
:'''Cat:''' What?!
:'''Kryten:''' What about us?''
:'''Rimmer:''' Never mind “us”, what about ME?

===''Lemons''===
:'''Rimmer:''' [[:wikipedia:William Shakespeare|He’s]] got a skullet.
:'''Lister:''' A skull what?''
:'''Rimmer:''' A bald mullet. A skullet. Bald at the front, mullet at the back. You wouldn't want to go out in public with this guy.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat:''' With just an Allen key and a Phillips screwdriver, assembly should take less than three hours.
:'''Rimmer:''' That’s Swedish for a week.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Erin:''' Ha-ha! I lived in the land of [[w:Albion|Albion]] for ten full cycles of the moon, but I fled after my family were dragged screaming from my home to a mighty wicker tower, where they were sacrificed to the three gods: [[w:Toutatis|Toutatis]], [[w:Esus|Esus]] and [[w:Taranis|Taranis]]. First they were garrotted to death, then they were burnt to death, then they were drowned to death. Three deaths to appease the three gods. Then the druids drank their blood and ate their meat and said the harvest would be bountiful.
:'''Lister:''' Right. Have you got any lemons?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister:''' We've walked 4,000 miles.
:'''Erin:''' How many do you want?
:'''Rimmer:''' Eight.
:'''Erin:''' Eight?! You walked across half the known world for ''eight'' lemons?
:'''Rimmer:''' You're right, that's absolutely insane. Make it ten.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' You’re him off the Bible, aren’t you?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jesus:''' The only escape from our enemies is to turn and love them!
:'''Rimmer:''' Or run. Running's good too!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jesus:''' It's as if I've smoked some bark from an acacia tree. Bad bark! Well bad bark!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten:''' Mr. Jesus? He hath risen!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jesus''': I'm looking for my uncle. Hast thou seen him?
:'''Erin''': No.
:'''Jesus''': If thou seest him, tell him that I will be in the tavern, drinking wine in great plenty until my legs do the dance of a newly-born camel! And then my mind will turn to dark, vile thoughts and I'll start coveting my neighbour's oxen!!
:'''Erin''': That's breaking the Tenth Commandment, that is.
:'''Jesus''': ''[giggles]'' And if there's time, I might even covet his donkey! And when I've finished coveting things, I might make a small statue out of wood and- and- and idolise it a bit!
:'''Erin''': You've got to watch yourself. God is a jealous God. You do that and he won't just get you, you know. According to the Second Commandment, he'll wipe out ''all'' your descendants.
:'''Jesus:''' Isn't that breaking the Sixth Commandment? 'Thou shalt not kill?'
:'''Erin:''' It's not killing, it's genocide. I think that's okay.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten''': According to the note, he's gone back to 23AD so he can &quot;trash his reputation so this Christianity thingth never taketh off-ffff-ffff-ffff-ffffth&quot;
:'''Lister:''' What? No Christianity? What about Christmas? We've killed Wallace and Gromit!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Look, so ''some'' stupid people did ''some'' stupid things in your name. It's not your fault. You make a lot of people happy. I mean, look at me: I presumed that throughout history, all famous people were amazing. And then I met you! And I realised they're not. In fact you're a bit of a knob. ''Just like me.'' Which means that I'm ''okay.''
:'''Jesus''': Yeah, I don't wanna ''be'' me. I don't wanna walk down the street and have people say 'ooh, look there's the Jesus of [[w:Caesarea|Caesarea]], the guy who caused all the wars!'
:'''Rimmer''': Jesus of Caesarea? You mean Jesus of Nazareth.
:'''Jesus''': ''[incredulous]'' Jesus of Caesarea? Son of Rachel the Fornicator, Samuel the Chicken Stealer.
:'''Lister''': Samuel the Chicken Stealer?
:'''Jesus''': He stole them, not me. Take it up with him. I'm always having to leg it because of him.
:'''Rimmer''': Erm, is Jesus quite a popular name around here?
:'''Jesus''': Yeah, there's a few of us. There's Jesus, son of John with a funny nose.... Jesus, son of Luke, he wraps plant leaves around the feet of horses, about 70 of us at the last census.
:''[The Dwarfers look utterly defeated]''
:'''Jesus''': Does this mean I'm not the son of God?
:''[Lister nods]''
:'''Jesus''': Oh, bugger.

===''Entangled''===
:'''Rimmer:''' What’s that smell? Has there been a fire in here?
:'''Lister:''' Just a small one. I put it out with me beer.
:'''Rimmer:''' For goodness sake, Lister, that’s terrible!
:'''Lister:''' Don’t panic, I’ve got another one.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' Lister, we have health and safety protocols for a reason: to safeguard the crew.
:'''Lister:''' What crew? The original crew? They all got wiped out remember?
:'''Rimmer:''' Exactly.
:'''Lister:''' By you.
:'''Rimmer:''' ...Exactly!
:'''Lister:''' When you didn't fix that drive plate properly, and that radiation leak fried them to a crisp.
:'''Rimmer:''' ......Exactly!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten:''' You’re up late, sir.
:'''Cat:''' Been hunting. Trying to swat this damned space weevil. Little sucker keeps outsmarting me.
:'''Kryten:''' Well they do have an IQ of two, sir.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat:''' I’m not here to help. Read my CV. &quot;Does not help. Does not clean. Will have sex with anything.&quot;
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten:''' He's speaking &quot;choking to death&quot;, sir. It is very hard to translate if you are not being strangled.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister:''' (After cutting off Cat's ponytail) Stage one achieved. What do we do now?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kryten:''' (Discussing the Erroneous Reasoning Research Academy) The staff were handpicked for their ability to be mistaken; for their gifts in fallacious analysis and defective reasoning.
:'''Cat:''' (To Rimmer) You could've excelled here.
:'''Kryten:''' They were all outstandingly good at being consistently incorrect. There were a lot of referees, TV critics, weathermen, who were then re-educated in the sciences, to develop extraordinary new, erroneous theories, that would combine together to produce works of great genius.
:'''Cat:''' Did it work?
:'''Kryten:''' No. The whole idea turned out to be wrong. The man behind the idea was so depressed he attempted suicide. Naturally he failed, and he went on to live into his nineties

===''Dear Dave''===
:'''Kryten:''' They say, due to the number of these letters of recommendation, they have absolutely no option but to request you stop writing them.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' Women have moved on from that move.
:'''Lister:''' Moves don’t move on.
:'''Rimmer:''' Moves move on!
:'''Lister:''' What, moves move?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' (''after Lister wheels away his chair into the rear wall'') Right, abusing the furniture. It's all going down [''into his report book''].

===''The Beginning''===
:'''Lister:''' So, let me get this right. We’re being attacked by something but we don’t know what, and there’s no way of finding out what’s out there?
:'''Kryten:''' I have a suggestion, sirs.
:'''Rimmer:''' What?
:'''Kryten:''' How about we look out of the window?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': I'd hardly call yelling &quot;Mummy, mummy,&quot; dignified.
:'''Rimmer''': Lister, I didn't yell &quot;mummy, mummy&quot;.
:'''Lister''': No you didn't have time, you just yelled &quot;Mu...&quot;.
:'''Kryten''': Please sirs, this is very bad for morale. I can't believe you're arguing about who's going to have the best death!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lecturer Rimmmer:''' Arnold, I’m not your father.
:'''Rimmer:''' But that's impossible. It's not true.
:'''Lecturer Rimmer:''' Look inside yourself and you will know I speak the truth. Your father wasn't me... it's Dungo, our gardener.
:'''Rimmer:''' But he's a babbling imbecile!
:'''Lister''': A billion-piece jigsaw suddenly falls into beautiful place.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Apart from pain. And maybe humiliation and obviously death. And failure. But apart from fear, pain and humiliation, failure and the unknown and death we have nothing to fear but fear itself. Who’s with me?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dominator Zlurth:''' It is the way of all things. You live, you die.
:'''Rimmer:''' But sometimes you live, you die, and then you live again. I know, I've done it myself.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Hogey the Roguey:''' (Repeated line in a cheesy Italian accent) You kills my brother!

== Red Dwarf: Series XI (2016)==
===''Twentica''===
:'''Kryten''': Perhaps that person we saw is a different version of Mr. Rimmer from an alternative dimension.
:'''Rimmer''': So if he dies, not the end of the world.
:'''Kryten''': Or perhaps he's a clone of Mr. Rimmer produced somehow from his DNA.
:'''Rimmer''': Again, if he dies, not the end of the world.
:'''Kryten''': Or perhaps that man is you, sir, a you seized from the future and taken back into the past.
:'''Cat''': Again, if he dies, not the end of the world!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Harmony''': This is the capacitor. The cops get their hands on this, we're deader than [[w:Theory_of_tides#Galileo's_attempt_to_explain_the_tides|Galileo's theory of tides]].
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cop''': How dense do you think I am?
:'''Harmony''': You really wanna know? Just divide your mass by your volume.

===''Samsara''===
:'''Lister''': Mmm (enjoys an ice cream cone in the top bunk as Rimmer lies in the lower bunk).
:'''Rimmer''': Who eats ice cream in bed?
:'''Lister''': Ah ah ah (ice cream plops on the floor) No complainin'. And no complainin' about not being able to complain about not complainin'.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': You know what the difference is between you and me?
:'''Lister''': I can't store hand luggage up me nostrils.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Smeg happens Rimmer, you just have to roll with it.
:'''Rimmer''': I've been rolling in smeg my whole damn life Lister. You don't need to lecture me about smeg rolling!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': I got it! I got it! The inventor guy I'm like, begins with R!
:'''Lister''': Who?
:'''Cat''': [[w:Archimedes|Archimedes]]!

===''Give &amp; Take''===
:'''Asclepius''': ''[Singing a twisted version of [[w:Row, Row, Row Your Boat|Row, Row, Row Your Boat]]]'' Slow, slow, slow your blood, gently as you breath. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is such a scream.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Ah, I thought you might be here!
:'''Snacky''': How could I be of service, sir?
:'''Rimmer''': I'd quite like to see you with regard to your psychiatric skills!
:[''Snacky backs away nervously'']
:'''Rimmer''': ''[Blissfully unaware of Snacky's nervousness]'' I've got some issues with my father, who I recently discovered wasn't my father. Also I've got some issues with my mother, who very sadly, is my mother.

===''Officer Rimmer''===
:'''Lister''': Okay, okay, we got pictures coming through.
:The display turns on, revealing the bio-printed Captain Edwin Herring, who unfortunately has his face on-top of his head following a printer jam.
:'''Captain Herring''': This is Captain Edwin Herring of the S.S. Nautilus, can you read me? Over.
:'''Rimmer''': Copy, Nautilus! But there's something wrong with our video feed. From our end you look like a hideous 19th century circus freak.
:'''Cat''': Bud! You look like you're wearing a toupée made of face!
:'''Lister''': Yeah, one look at you and even the [[w:Elephant Man|Elephant Man]] would wanna jump in his mum and dad's bed!
:'''Captain Herring''': The bio-printer jammed, it's faulty. My face has been printed on the top of my head. Any advice?
:'''Cat''': Yeah, don't wear a hat!
:'''Captain Herring''': What's my position? Obviously, it's difficult to see.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': What about your escape pods? Maybe use one of those!
:'''Captain Herring''': Too late, they've escaped. That's what happens when we put machines on artificial intelligence - they just look after number one.
:'''Rimmer''': Perhaps you should print some more of your crew, sir! Get assistance!
:'''Captain Herring''': I've just told you my bio-printer's faulty you cretin. My visuals are down... what's your name crewman?
:'''Rimmer''': Dave Lister, sir!
:'''Captain Herring''': Don't speak again Lister, understand?
:'''Rimmer''': Yes, sir!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cat''': Hey, what the hell is this?
:'''Clone Rimmer in a barbershop quartet''': We're the barbershop quartet!
:'''Rimmer''': Any ID?
:The barbershop quartet of cloned Rimmers gather in a horizontal line and begin to sing.

:''Rim, Rim, Rimmerdy, Rim, Rim,''
::''Rim, Rim, Rimmerdy, Rim''

:''Rim, Rim, Rimmerdy, Rim, Rim,''
::''Rim, Rim, Rimmerdy, Rim''

:''Mr. Rimmer! We are what we seem! (Rim, Rim, Rim, Rim)''
::''The cutest quartet, that you've ever seen! (Rim, Rim, Rim, Rim)''

:''We got four mouths! A duet times two! (Rim, Rimmerdy, Rim)''
::''This barbershop quartet is singing for you!''

:'''Rimmer''': ''[To Lister and Cat]'' Now that, is entertainment! ''[To the barbershop quartet]'' In you go!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

===''Krysis''===
:Sparks suddenly fly within the cockpit as the alarm begins to ring.
:'''Lister''': What the smeg was that?
:'''Kryten''': Its the EM boosters. Of course! Butler, the damn fool, he didn't realize that unlike the Nova-3, all our boards have universal linkage!
:'''Lister''': Meaning?
:'''Kryten''': The engines are gonna burnout, sir! He'll look utterly stupid!
:'''Lister''': So does that mean we'll gonna crash?
:'''Kryten''': How stupid is he gonna look then!
:'''Lister''': Yeah, but say we die!
:'''Kryten''': Even better!
:'''Lister''': Is there no way we can land and repair?
:'''Kryten''': Well, we could. But why should we help Butler out?
:'''Lister''': Kryten!
:'''Kryten''': Oh, my jealousy chip's overloading, sir! Return to sane mode! ''[Computer sounds emit from Kryten]'' Of course we should land!

===''Can of Worms''===
:''[After Cat has hidden his Polymorph children from the rest of the crew]''
:'''Lister''': Well we have to narrow down the search somehow.
:'''Rimmer''': Got an idea! Turn off all the heat in the ship apart from in the diesel decks, so it'll drive him down there!
:'''Lister''': And then what?
:'''Kryten''': Track them down undetected!
:'''Lister''': They are Polymorphs! They feed off emotions, they will sense us!
:'''Rimmer''': Not if one of us has got no emotions, as they've had them all removed!
:'''Lister''': ''[Confused]'' Eh?
:'''Rimmer''': Listy, if you have a personality tuck to remove all your emotions, we'll sorted!
:'''Lister''': That stupid tuck machine, why me?
:'''Rimmer''': Kryten is the only one who knows how to operate it, so it can't be him. ''[Kryten nods in agreement]'' It can't be me, obviously. That leaves you!
:'''Lister''': Why can't it be you?
:'''Rimmer''': Don't interrupt.

== Red Dwarf: Series XII (2017) ==
===''Cured''===
:'''Lister''': Moonbase coming up on our starboard side, what is this place Krytes?
:'''Kryten''': Mmh, according to the ident, it's a United America scientific research station.
:'''Rimmer''': United America? Who's that?
:'''Kryten''': Well, at the end of the 23rd century, America attempted to bring peace to the world by asking every nation on Earth to sign a peace treaty. Any nation that refused, they invaded. Now, a war ensued that was called, 'The War Against War'! Those countries that went to war, because they were so against war that they were prepared to go to war to fight in a war against war, called themselves, United America!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Lister''': This evil cure Kryten, any idea on who they tested it on?
:'''Rimmer''': You think there might be wall-to-wall crazies in here? Running around rioting, screaming, and stabbing people?
:'''Lister''': You make it sound like my old school!
:'''Rimmer''': I want all the bazookoids, safetys off, ready to fire.
:'''Kryten''': All the bazookoids are back on Red Dwarf, sir.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[Sighing]'' Have we got any guns with us?
:'''Kryten''': Just your staple gun, sir.
:''Dramatic zoom in on Rimmer.''
:'''Rimmer''': Fill her up!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''[[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]]''': It's because I'm Hitler, isn't it?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Lister''': Ah! So you can't go anywhere, without us!
:'''Professor Telford''': I only need one of you, ''[Aims gun at the crew]'' the rest of you are going to die! ''[To Cat]'' You!
:'''Cat''': Who, me?
:'''Professor Telford''': You have no loyalty to them, a Cat has no fidelity to anyone but himself. Join me!
:'''Lister''': I don't care what the damn scan says, we're the Posse! ''[Begins to perform the 'Boys from the Dwarf' [[w:Gang signal|gang signal]], with Kryten, Rimmer, and Cat following]'' Boys from the Dwarf!
:'''Cat''': Yeah!
:'''Lister''': Noones changing sides here!
:'''Cat''': Nu-huh!
:'''Profressor Telford''': ''[To Cat]'' I'll give you anything that you want!
:'''Cat''': Sounds good!
:''Cat walks across the room and stands next to Telford.''
:'''Lister''': ''[Shocked]'' Cat man!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Lister''': I'll give you anything that your heart desires, plus a special secret surprise, if you join us!
:'''Cat''': ''[Excited]'' I love secret surprises!
:''Cat excitedly jumps across the room and stands next to the crew again.''
:'''Professor Telford''': They're not going to be giving you anything since pretty soon they'll gonna be dead! In fact let me prove it to you by killing them one-by-one!
:'''Cat''': No wait! I'm with you! But I get to do it! ''[Becomes stonefaced]''
:''Cat slowly walks across the room back to Telford, who cautiously aims the gun at Cat.''
:'''Professor Telford''': Can I trust you? Can I? ''[Aims gun right at Cat's head]'' Really?
:'''Cat''': I'm a psychopath, ain't I? You and me both! What more do you need?
:''Telford takes out a laser pistol from his back-pocket and hands it to Cat.''
:''Cat takes the pistol, and shoots Telford in the face killing him instantly.''

===''Siliconia''===
:'''Cat''': ''[On television monitor]'' Hey, bud! It's me! How you doing with that shirt?
:'''Kryten''': Coming right up, sir.
:'''Cat''': ''[On television monitor]'' My ass is freezing here! I got six nipples you can hang mugs on!
:'''Kryten''': I'm seconds away, sir.
:''The television monitor turns off and quickly back on showing Rimmer in a corridor.''
:'''Rimmer''': ''[On television monitor]'' Kryten, I'm on B-deck, and it doesn't appear to have been mopped in at least two days. I can hardly see my face in it!
:'''Kryten''': ''[Whispering to himself]'' A blessing, some would say. ''[Now speaking directly]'' I'm on it right now, sir.
:''The television monitor turns off and quickly back on showing Lister lying on a couch.''
:'''Lister''': ''[On television monitor]'' Kryten, when you get a chance, could you grab us a beer?
:''Camera reveals Kryten and Lister in the same room.''
:'''Kryten''': Sir, I'm rather busy right now! Could you possibly get it yourself?
:'''Lister''': Fine.
:''Lister leans over and takes out a beer from the mini-fridge right next to him.''
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:The black-clad mechanoids take Lister, Rimmer, and Cat away.
:'''Wind''': ''[Speaking to Kryten]'' Not you, my friend.
:'''Kryten''': My crewmates, where are you taking them?
:'''Wind''': To face justice. We are the Mechanoid Intergalactic Liberation Front.
:'''Kryten''': ''[Bewildered]'' [[w:MILF|MILFs]]?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Kryten Cat''': I've got a registered trademark where my wing-dang-doodle used to be!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:The Kryten-ifyed Lister, Rimmer, and Cat, after dismantling each other to get through the locked gate, finish reassembling and head-off.
:'''Kryten Lister''': Come on, let's go!
:Kryten Rimmer pushes the nearby alarm button alerting their escape.
:'''Kryten Lister''': What are you doing?!
:'''Kryten Rimmer''': I'm sounding the alarm.
:'''Kryten Lister''': Change my head and call me Stanley! Whatever for?
:'''Kryten Rimmer''': I like being a mechanoid. I don't have to become an officer anymore, compete with my brothers. Envy, ambition, that acid ball of resentment I carried around with me the whole time; it's gone.
:'''Kryten Lister''': You need to get your [[w:neuroses|neuroses]] back!
:'''Kryten Rimmer''': But sir, I don't want them back.
:'''Kryten Lister''': They're what makes you, you!
:'''Kryten Rimmer''': I want to be a mechanoid programmed to serve. Sometimes, when I was young, I'd sit for hours staring at our fish tank feeling envious.
:'''Kryten Cat''': You wanted to be a fish tank?!
:'''Kryten Rimmer''': I wanted to be a fish. They had food, a small rock to swim in and out of, they didn't have a care in the world.
:'''Kryten Cat''': That's 'cause I wasn't there!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:The MILFs are preparing to inaugurate Kryten as an official member of their alliance.
:'''Kryten''': I pledge my allegiance to the Mechanoid Intergalactic Liberation Front!
:Kryten is given a black [[w:beret|beret]] by Wind.
:'''Wind''': From this day forth, you shall be known as -
:Kryten Lister runs in.
:'''Kryten Lister''': Kryten! What are you doing?!
:'''Kryten''': Well, I'm becoming free, sir. I mean, I'm becoming free of you over there! I see now that you never cared for me. I was merely used to do your bidding! Well, no more! As I'm no longer your slave bot! 
:'''Kryten Lister''': Kryten, don't you see? You've been brainwashed. You were never a slave bot!
:'''Kryten''': Then what was I?
:'''Kryten Lister''': Lots of things! You were our science officer, our cook, my mum, and most of all, my friend. And you were all those things because you chose to be, Kryten. Not 'cause we made you. Kryten, you're no MILF! You're one of the boys from the Dwarf! ''[Kryten Lister does the Boys from the Dwarf gang signal, but with only one hand due to the other being cut off earlier]''
:Several other MILFs led by Areto, including Kryten Rimmer and Kryten Cat now completely brainwashed, march into the room.
:'''Areto''': There he is! Seize him!
:'''Kryten Lister''': They keep mech slaves in the engine room! They power the ship. They're hypocrites!
:Kryten turns to Wind with a shocked expression.
:'''Wind''': Someone has to do the grunt work! Surely you're not suggesting Mk. 3s should do it.
:'''Kryten Lister''': Mk. 3s! Mk. 2s! You're all the same!
:'''Wind''': We're 7.6 millimetres thinner. 10 grams lighter. Plus we come in this really cool matte finish.
:'''All MILF soldiers''': So cool!

=== ''Timewave'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': Look, we're here to warn you that your ship is on a collision course with a very important moon called Planet Rimmer.
:'''Crit Cop''': I'm gonna let you off with a caution.
:'''Cat''': ''[To the crew]'' Caution?! How dumb is this guy? ''[To the Crit Cop]'' Hey! Lieutenant Asshole, If you don't move your dumb-ass spaceship, we're gonna be flatter than your wife's droopy-ass titties, capisce?
:The Crit Cops takes out a [[w:taser|taser]] and shoots Cat with it.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Crit Cop''': You don't know what it was like before. Ship was a shambles. Everyone arguing, constantly choosing new captains. So they brought in the anti-criticism law to make people more tolerant.
:'''Lister''': But any smegger can see that society can't function like that.
:'''Crit Cop''': Yeah, but once they outlawed criticism, nobody could criticise the criticism law because it was illegal to criticise! Idiots! I just criticised something, didn't I? Oh, God, I've not done that for ages, that felt good! Oh! Criticising's great, isn't it?! Gives ya a real lift! ''[To Rimmer]'' I don't like your shoes, by the way. ''[To Kryten]'' Ah! What's the story with his head? Looks like something from that TV show, &quot;When [[w:circumcision|Circumcisions]] Go Wrong&quot;!

=== ''Mechocracy'' ===
:'''Rimmer''': As Second Technician and acting senior officer onboard the JMC registered mining ship, Red Dwarf, I have the privilege to advise that, you, Third Technician David Lister have been promoted.
:'''Lister''': Which makes me equal with you so now, you can't demote me! You totally screwed that one up, didn't you, Rimmer?
:'''Rimmer''': Have been promoted from Third Technician to Technician 2.5, making you under my authority by half a command point, still giving me the ability to demote you.
:'''Lister''': So demote me then, like I care.
:'''Rimmer''': Maybe I won't demote you.
:'''Lister''': Of course you will.
:'''Rimmer''': Feels good, doesn't it? Does your chest jut out that bit more? Do you feel a little bit taller?
:'''Lister''': I told you Rimmer. I. Don't. Care.
:'''Rimmer''': I bet your gran would be proud, if she knew.
:'''Lister''': ''[Face turns solemn]'' I know what you're trying to do here, Rimmer.
:'''Rimmer''': In that case you'll know all I want is for you to be the best person you can be. Maybe, then, you'll stop drinking and getting fatter!
:'''Cat''': Hey, that's not fair, he's not getting fatter. He's always been this fat!
:'''Rimmer''': You think I'm the bad guy in this, don't you? But, Lister, you're bright, you could go places, maybe even further than me.
:'''Lister''': Definitely further than you.
:'''Rimmer''': And it frustrates me no end to see you fritter it all away. And, here's another thing. Just imagine how proud your gran would be if she'd known you'd be promoted. Am I right?
:'''Lister''': Maybe.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[Repeating]'' Maybe?
:'''Lister''': All right, she'd have been made-up. She always told me that...
:'''Rimmer''': ''[Interrupting]'' You're demoted.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:A political advertisement suddenly starts on the monitor.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[On the television]'' Tonight we look at the two contenders, statesman and war hero, Arnold J. Rimmer, and toilet droid Kryten 2X4B 523P.
:'''Lister''': ''[Watching]'' What's this?
:'''Political Ad Narrator''': A mechanoid is running for election, but do the electorate know this droid has a history of mental illness? The only survivor on the Nova-5, he tended a crew of skeletons believing them to be alive. He now wants to look after you. Do you mind he can't tell the difference between the living and the dead?
:'''Cat''': ''[On the television]'' You're only as good as your running mate. Has anyone taken a close look at Kryten's number two, David 'Dodgy Boy' Lister?
:'''Lister''': ''[Watching]'' You what?
:'''Cat''': ''[On the television]'' A man who served a jail term in stasis for smuggling unquarantined animals aboard a JMC mining ship? Major questions remain unanswered!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''A political advertisement suddenly starts on the monitor.
:'''Lister''': ''[On the television]'' This [[w:infomercial|infomercial]] comes to you on behalf of the Independent Future Party.
:'''Political Ad Narrator''': Arnold Rimmer, a man who wiped out the crew of Red Dwarf and killed himself, twice! Are you really going to put your life in this maniac's hands?
:'''Lister''': ''[On the television]'' Arnold Rimmer. Not fit. Not trusted. A no-good, double-dealing, cheating, slimy little smegger!
:On the television, Kryten runs up next to Lister.
:'''Kryten''': That's enough, sir.
:'''Lister''': I got more, Kryten.
:'''Kryten''': ''[To the camera]'' I'm Kryten 2X4B 523P, and I approve this message!
:'''Lister''': I've got more!
:Lister realizes the ad is over and smiles at the camera next to Kryten.

=== ''M-Corp'' ===
:'''Kryten''': ''[Singing a rendition of [[w:Happy Birthday to You|Happy Birthday to You]]]'' Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, Mr. Lister! Happy birthday to you!
:'''Lister''': ''[Waking up from bed]'' Today?
:'''Kryten''': ''[Setting down a birthday cake]'' It's the big one, sir!
:'''Lister''': What, I'm thirty?
:Kryten chuckles and lifts his arms indicating a higher number.
:'''Lister''': Forty?
:Kryten chuckles and lifts his arms again.
:'''Lister''': Oh, what am I doing? I don't want to know! Don't want to know. Brain, I'm not listening. ''[Covering his ears and miming singing]'' La la la la la la la.
:'''Kryten''': The years pass, but with them comes the soothing balm of new found grace and maturity.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''The program on the monitor finishes updating and the JMC logo is replaced with that of M-Corp along with a melodic tune accompanying it.''
:'''Lister''': M-Corp?
:''Aniter appears on the screen.''
:'''Aniter''': Your company has been bought by M-Corp. You probably have a lot of questions. Who is M-Corp? What do we do? Let's find out together. M-Corp is the biggest multinational conglomerate in known space. We lead, we innovate using our patented M-Corp port technology. Your ship will now be stocked with a variety of M-Corp products to elevate your lifestyle in space.
:''Several white crates marked with the M-Corp logo materialize onboard the ship.''
:'''Aniter''': M-Corp. We love looking after you!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Anything on M-Corp?
:'''Kryten''': They bought Earth in the late 26th century.
:'''Rimmer''': Bought Earth? Bought what exactly?
:'''Kryten''': They bought the entire planet, sir. And everything on it. Including fixtures and fittings. Oceans, countries, animals, houses, curtains, you name it. They even bought all the stuff nobody likes. Maggots, quicksand, even the American chocolate.
:'''Cat''': Where'd they get all the dough from?
:'''Kryten''': M-Corp owned all the electricity and oil and gas and wind. Even the rain water.
:'''Rimmer''': But the rain water belongs to Earth. To everyone and everything on it. My God, I've turned into a [[w:hippy|hippy]].
:'''Cat''': And the Earth dudes just stood around and let this happen?
:'''Kryten''': Well, by then, M-Corp had introduced a law to tax thinking.
:'''Cat''': A Think Tax?
:'''Rimmer''': ''[Points to Cat]'' You'd have got a [[w:tax rebate|rebate]] every year.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Lister''': There's no way I'm buying anything off you guys! Ever.
:Lister reacts to a sharp pain in his stomach.
:'''Aniter''': Would you like to buy some pain pills, Dave?
:'''Lister''': No.
:Lister reacts to another sharp pain.
:'''Aniter''': We can dock it directly from your account.
:'''Lister''': ''[In pain]'' All right, fine! Quick.
:The sound of a coin click plays as the pills appear.
:'''Lister''': Water! I need a glass of water!
:'''Aniter''': That will be 40 [[w:List_of_Red_Dwarf_concepts#Dollarpound|dollar-pounds]], Dave.
:'''Lister''': ''[In disbelief]'' For water?
:'''Aniter''': For the glass. The water is a further 400 dollar-pounds.

=== ''Skipper'' ===
:''Rimmer is sat in the sleeping quarters writing as the Cat enters.''
:'''Cat''': Hey, hey! Officer Smegski!
:''Cat sits alongside Rimmer.''
:'''Cat''': How's it going, non bud!
:'''Rimmer''': I'm busy, don't disturb me. Last time you disturbed me, I was doing the safety check, and I failed to notice the diesel decks were flooded.
:'''Cat''': All I said was, &quot;Help, I'm on fire.&quot;
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Rimmer:''' ''[Looking at scanner screen]'' What is that?
:'''Kryten:''' It appears that some kind of anomaly has penetrated our universe.
:'''Rimmer:''' I hate people who use the word ''anomaly''. They think they're so cool. &quot;Oh look, here's an anomaly anomalling away. I'm really cosmologically on-trend because I know what anomaly means.&quot; It's just a fancy-schmancy word for Weird.
:'''Kryten:''' Sir, something weird has penetrated our universe which appears to have caused a giant lesion across the space-time continuum. Is it okay to say &quot;lesion&quot; sir or would you prefer &quot;cut&quot;?
:'''Rimmer:''' Lesions, cuts, they're both the same to me. It's people who say &quot;continuum&quot; that I can't stand.

== Red Dwarf: The Promised Land (2020) ==
:'''Lister''': I'm a nobody really. Come on guys, back me up here.
''[All at once]''
:'''Kryten''': Well, he's a nobody.
:'''Cat''': He's less than nobody!
:'''Rimmer''': An absolute zero.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Act like a God? You scarcely mastered human.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': ''[close to tears]'' You don't need me. I'm not sure you ever did. I don't exist. What's the point of me?
:'''Lister''': ''[desperately]'' Rimmer, we're the posse. We're the &quot;Boyz&quot; from the Dwarf. We're like the Four Musketeers. D'Artagnan, Porthos, Athos... and the other one. Rimmer, you're the other one.
:'''Rimmer''': I'm the other one?
:'''Lister''': You do all the stuff that the other one does.
:'''Rimmer''': And what's that, then?
:'''Lister''': Other one stuff!
:'''Rimmer''': Other one stuff? What's other one stuff?
:'''Lister''': All the stuff that the others haven't done that the other one does.
:'''Rimmer''': I'm pointless.
:'''Lister''': No you're not.

== Novels ==
=== Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers (1989) ===
:'''Rimmer''': Oh, great. Not only am I dead, I don't exist, either! Thanks a lot, God!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:0.57 seconds before he expired, Rimmer realised he was going to die. His life didn't flash before his eyes. He didn't think of his parents, or his brothers, or his home. He didn't think of the failed exams or the wasted time in the stasis booths. He didn't even think of his one brief affair with Yvonne McGruder, the ship's female boxing champion.
:What he did think of was a bowl of soup. A bowl of gazpacho soup.
:Then he died.
:Then everyone died.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:Kryten was teriffic. A real godsend. Provided all you needed was a plateful of triangular-shaped cucumber sandwiches with the crust removed and a pot of lemon tea. If, on the other hand, you needed someone to scrape uranium ore free of waste and pack it into sealed cases, all you got was another plateful of cucumber sandwiches and a second pot of lemon tea.

=== Better Than Life (1990) ===
:'''Talkie Toaster''': You're senile.
:'''Holly''': ''[Unsuccessfully hiding his expression of astonishment]'' You what?
:'''Talkie Toaster''': You've got to be. Why would a huge mainframe computer with a fifteen zillion gigabyte capacity and a projected IQ in excess of six thousand, want a novelty talking toaster for companionship, if he wasn't off his trolley? You've gone computer senile, haven't you?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Spaghettification. Let me guess. I can see only two options: one -- due to the bizarre effects of the intense gravitational pull, and because we're entering a region of time and space where the laws of physics no longer apply, we all of us inexplicably develop an irresistible urge to consume vast amounts of a certain wheat-based Italian noodle conventionally served with Parmesan cheese; or two -- we, the crew, get turned into spaghetti. I have a feeling we can eliminate option one.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:The funeral of the last remaining member of the human race was neither a solemn nor a sombre affair. Quite the opposite. Lister's favourite dance track, &quot;Born to Brutalize,&quot; thumped out of his old wax-blaster with such force it shook the coffin. Kryten, Rimmer, and the Cat stood around the metal casket, wearing green Day-glo [[w:Deely bobber|Deely-boppers]], battery-propelled revolving bow-ties and yellow fishing waders, precisely as Lister had requested in his Last Will and Testament.

=== Last Human (1995) ===
:'''GELF Regulator''': He destroyed the entire asteroid of Cyrius 3 and looted and plundered his way across the entire belt. He destroyed a Starhopper which served Ariel 2 and he was responsible for many deaths, including my own.
:'''Kryten''': ''[Repeating slowly]'' He was responsible for many deaths, including your own?
:'''GELF Regulator''': Yes.
:'''Kryten''': He killed you, my lord?
:'''GELF Regulator''': I'm afraid he did.
:'''Kryten''': ''[Kryten shakes his head]'' I'm not sure I understand, sir.
:'''GELF Regulator''': Does anyone? What possesses a creature to go on such a wicked orgy of murder and mayhem?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:He smiled at her and she smiled back as she placed the bacon on the end of the fork and started to feed him. He felt kind of stupid, like a little boy again. Small and helpless. He started to remember his foster parents.

:Tom and Beth Thornton.

:Tom with his round, sad spaniel face and terrible posture, and Beth with her ugly smile and sickly perfume. He could smell it now. It nauseated him. He could hear Old Prune Face's laugh; the terrible, terrible braying laugh that could have sawn down Canadian redwoods. And then he started to remember the beatings with the brown clothesbrush. Now he could see Old Prune Face's eyes and the darkness that descended over her when she was 'nettled'. He could feel the rips of pain that gouged through his body, ploughing furrows through his flesh. He could hear his own screams soaked in saliva, gurgling in his throat.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Rimmer''': Your mother, uh, she was a woman. A very remarkable woman. It can't have been easy bringing up a boy on geo-mapper's wages, getting you through college and into the Academy. Some people, and I used to count myself among them, believe there's a class system and someone like you - who doesn't have a completely pukka background - would never be admitted into such high-ranking company. That's bullshit. Your mother went out and proved that. She got you through college, she got you through the Star Fleet and now here you are, an SCM. She's a remarkable woman, a truly courageous, remarkable woman.
:'''McGruder''': It's you who were my inspiration, sir.
:'''Rimmer''': ''[Rimmer shakes his head]'' You owe everything to her. Everything. She really made you into something. Something you should be proud of.

=== Backwards (1996) ===
:''Every Good Boy Deserves Favour.''

:Arnold J. Rimmer, age seven and almost a quarter, is attempting to concentrate on his music notation lesson. For reasons that elude his young mind, it is vitally, ''vitally'' important for him to master the piano. More important than anything. More important, even, than concealing from his brothers the secret location of his Dead Spiders and Other Wriggly Things collection. Life-or-death important. He must commit to memory the names of the notes on the musical staves, E, G, B, D, F, using the time-honoured mnemonic:

:''Every Good Boy Deserves Favour.''

:He's concentrating as hard as he can. His little face is bunched up like a constipated pig at a truffle festival. But he's got a problem, young Arnold has. And this is the problem: he knows he's going to fail. He has no ear for music. He has no talent for the piano. But then again, he has no talent for ''anything''. The only thing he is good at is letting his parents down. That's easy for Arnold J. Rimmer age seven and almost a quarter. It's a breeze.

:''Every Good Boy Disappoints Father.''
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cat''': I don't get it. We're supposed to be afraid of a bunch of dooh-dooh brains like eraser-tipped pencil-head here? ''[Cat nods at Kryten]''
:'''Kryten''': Begging your pardon, sir, they are not mechanoids, they are agonoids.
:'''Cat''': What's the difference?
:'''Kryten''': Well, the basic difference is that a mechanoid would never crack open a human's ribcage and use his right lung as a bedpan.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Pizzak'Rapp''': I am Piece of Crap, welcome to... hell.

== Cast ==
*[[w:Craig Charles|Craig Charles]] - [[w:Dave Lister|Dave Lister]] (Series I - Present)
*[[w:Danny John-Jules|Danny John-Jules]] - [[w:Cat (Red Dwarf)|The Cat]] (Series I - Present)
*[[w:Chris Barrie|Chris Barrie]] - [[w:Arnold Rimmer|Arnold Rimmer]] (Series I - Present)
*[[w:Robert Llewellyn|Robert Llewellyn]] - [[w:Kryten|Kryten]] (Series III - Present)
*[[w:Norman Lovett|Norman Lovett]] - [[w:Holly (Red Dwarf)|Holly]] (Series I - II, VII - VIII, XII - The Promised Land)
*[[w:Hattie Hayridge|Hattie Hayridge]] - [[w:Holly (Red Dwarf)|Holly]] (Series III - V)
*Clare Grogan - Kristine Kochanski (Series I, II, VI) [[w:Chloë Annett|Chloë Annett]] - [[w:Kristine Kochanski|Kristine Kochanski]] (Series VII - VIII, Back to Earth)
*[[w:Mac McDonald|Mac McDonald]] - [[w:List of Red Dwarf characters#Captain Frank Hollister|Captain Frank Hollister]] (Series I - II, VIII, XII)

== External links ==

{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title | id=0094535 | title=Red Dwarf}}
* [http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/reddwarf/factbox/index.shtml BBC Red Dwarf Quotes]
* [http://reddwarfed.blogspot.co.uk/ Red Dwarf Scripts Series 1-8]
* [[w:Red Dwarf (book)|Red Dwarf]], {{ISBN|1-56865-049-3}}

[[Category:Current shows]]
[[Category:Comic science fiction TV shows]]
[[Category:UK sitcoms]]
[[Category:Television series on DVD]]
[[Category:BBC shows]]
[[Category:Single-camera sitcoms]]</text>
      <sha1>q6n1la2mzegardkbt4xdj1t8slgt04b</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>George Shelvocke</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>2827</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964939</id>
      <parentid>2992383</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:07:42Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Lizaphukan21</username>
        <id>3313169</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Factual correction and typography: Updated birth/death dates (1675–1742) based on historical consensus, corrected book publication year to 1726, and fixed title capitalization.</comment>
      <origin>3964939</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="463" sha1="dz5h13nvkihlldd0du00lk74izxujk3" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Captain '''George Shelvocke''' (1675–1742) was an English privateer who wrote a famous 1726 book based on his exploits, ''A Voyage Round the World by Way of the Great South Sea''.

{{people-stub}}

== Sourced ==

*They had half a mind to refuse me a passage.
**''A Voyage Around the World'', p. 462. (1726)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Shelvocke, George}}
[[Category:Authors]]
[[Category:1728 deaths]]
[[Category:People from England]]</text>
      <sha1>dz5h13nvkihlldd0du00lk74izxujk3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ed, Edd n Eddy</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>3676</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964914</id>
      <parentid>3963608</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:50:17Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Cast */ Fixed section to remove unconstructive bloat</comment>
      <origin>3964914</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2376" sha1="6v078jz7jf8xztnc1o71vj9jkq89evr" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Jawbreaker plate.jpg|thumb|Jawbreakers!]]
{{italic title}}
[[w:Ed, Edd n Eddy|'''''Ed, Edd n Eddy''''']] (1999–2009) is an animated television series created by Danny Antonucci which aired on Cartoon Network. The series features a group of three boys named &quot;Ed&quot;, &quot;Edd&quot; and &quot;Eddy&quot; known as the Ed Boys, also referred to as the Eds for short, who create crazy money-making scams in order to buy Jawbreakers, their favorite candy.

== Seasons ==
::[[Ed, Edd n Eddy (season 1)|Season 1]]
::[[Ed, Edd n Eddy (season 2)|Season 2]]
::[[Ed, Edd n Eddy (season 3)|Season 3]]
::[[Ed, Edd n Eddy (season 4)|Season 4]]
::[[Ed, Edd n Eddy (season 5)|Season 5]]
::[[Ed, Edd n Eddy (season 6)|Season 6]]

== Specials ==
===[[Ed, Edd n Eddy's Jingle Jingle Jangle]]===
===[[Ed, Edd n Eddy's Hanky Panky Hullabaloo]]===
===[[Ed, Edd n Eddy's Boo-Haw Haw]]===
===[[The Eds Are Coming!]]===

:''See also ''[[If It Smells Like an Ed]]'', ''[[Take This Ed and Shove It]]'', ''[[Out with the Old, in with the Ed]]'' and ''[[A Fistful of Ed]]''''

== Film ==
===[[Ed, Edd n Eddy's Big Picture Show]]===

==Video games==
* [[Ed, Edd n' Eddy: Jawbreakers!|Ed, Edd n Eddy: Jawbreakers!]]
* [[Ed, Edd n' Eddy: The Mis-Edventures|Ed, Edd n Eddy: The Mis-Edventures]]
* [[Ed, Edd n' Eddy: Scam of the Century|Ed, Edd n Eddy: Scam of the Century]]

== Cast == 
*[[w:Matt Hill|Matt Hill]] - Ed
*[[w:Samuel Vincent|Samuel Vincent]] - Double D (Edd)
*[[w:Tony Sampson|Tony Sampson]] - Eddy
*[[w:Kathleen Barr|Kathleen Barr]] - Marie Kanker, Kevin
*[[w:Tabitha St. Germain|Tabitha St. Germain]] (Season 1), [[w:Jenn Forgie|Jenn Forgie]] (Season 3) - Nazz
*[[w:Erin Fitzgerald|Erin Fitzgerald]] - Nazz (Seasons 2, 4-5), May Kanker
*[[w:Janyse Jaud|Janyse Jaud]] - Sarah, Lee Kanker
*Keenan Christenson - Jimmy
*[[w:David Paul Grove|David Paul Grove]] - Jonny 2x4
*[[w:Peter Kelamis|Peter Kelamis]] - Rolf
*[[w:Danny Antonucci|Danny Antonucci]] - Mr. Sun, [[w:Santa Claus|Santa]]
*[[w:Terry Klassen|Terry Klassen]] - Eddy's Brother

== External Links ==
{{wikipedia}}
*[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0184111/ IMDb Page]

[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Ed, Edd n Eddy|1999]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]</text>
      <sha1>6v078jz7jf8xztnc1o71vj9jkq89evr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Falling Down</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>4052</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965083</id>
      <parentid>3961600</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:06:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39418-37</username>
        <id>3349651</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I added more quotes like the conversation between Prendergast and his wife and Foster and his wife.</comment>
      <origin>3965083</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43349" sha1="ax0zupjyrw62oqthk8x1h98qwsrknmh" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Michael Douglas César 2016 3.jpg|thumb|I lost my job. Actually, I didn't lose it, it lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled...Maybe it's the other way around, I forget. But, I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own daughter.]]
'''''[[w:Falling Down|Falling Down]]''''' is a [[w:1993 in film|1993 drama film]] about laid-off defense worker who is enraged by a traffic jam and rampages across Los Angeles as a police sergeant searches for purpose on his retirement day.
:''Directed by [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]. Written by [[w:Ebbe Roe Smith|Ebbe Roe Smith]].''
{{center/s}}'''A Tale Of Urban Reality.'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]{{center/e}}

==William Foster==
* ''[While destroying merchandise in a Korean owned grocery store]'' You think I'm a thief? No. See, I'm not the thief, I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a STINKING SODA! YOU'RE THE THIEF! I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer! I'm rolling prices back to 1965! What do you think of that? 

* Okay. Okay. I was willing to mind my own business. I was willing to respect your territory and treat you like a man, but you couldn't leave it alone, could you? You couldn't let a man sit here for 5 minutes and take a rest on your precious piece of shit hill?! 

* Why have you put barbed wire on a fence? Is this how you rich people amuse yourselves? You put barbed wire on the fence so innocent people like me can hurt our hands looking in, huh?

* I lost my job. Actually I didn't lose it. It lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled. Maybe it's the other way around. I forget, but I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own kid.

* I am not a vigilante. I'm just trying to get home to my daughter's birthday. If everyone will stay out of my way, then nobody will get hurt. 

* What the hell are you trying to do? Kill me with the golf ball? IS THAT ENOUGH, YOU GOT ALL THESE BEAUTIFUL ACRES FENCING FOR YOUR LITTLE GAME, BUT YOU OUGHT TO KILL ME WITH THE GOLF BALL!? You should have children playing here! You should have FAMILIES HAVING PICNICS! YOU SHOULD HAVE A GODDAMN PETTING ZOO!! Instead you got these stupid carts for you old men with nothing better to do!!!

* I've passed the point of no return, Beth. You know when that is? That's the point in a journey where it's longer to go back to the beginning than it is to continue to the end. It's like...Do you remember when [[w:Apollo 13|those astronauts got in trouble when they were going to the moon]] and something went wrong? I don't know, somebody screwed up and they had to get them back to Earth, but they had passed the point of no return. So, they had to go all the way around the moon to get back, and they were out of contact for hours. Everybody waited breathlessly to see if a bunch of dead guys in a can would pop out the other side, and that's me. I'm on the other side of the moon now, out of contact, and everybody's just going to have to wait until I pop out.

* Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to [[w:Uxoricide|kill your wife if she insults you?]]

* I wanna know what's wrong with the street. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, I think you're just trying to justify your inflated budgets! 

*It's my little girl's birthday today. We were going to have a barbecue like you guys, and she was going to play outside, my wife would hold my hand, and we'd talk about grown up things. And then when it got dark, we'd all [[w:Familicide|go to sleep together.]] We'd all sleep together in the dark. And everything will be just like it was before.

== Martin Prendergast ==
[[File:Robert Duvall 2 by David Shankbone.jpg|thumb|Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner's drying out in the oven? Hey! They lie to everybody, they lie to the fish. But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special, is your daughter.]]
* Martin Prendergast. Downtown robbery. Let's go. 
* Genuine Santa Monica sand's more like it. 
* You mean he stole your baseball bat but he paid for the soda? Oh, this guy's discriminating. 
* What would a guy in a white shirt and tie be doing in gangland?
* Sandra, you have a career. It's not easy to see your beauty go and that's all you got. 
* Now, if you go up against this guy, be careful. 
* Me? I'm a coward, the captain just told me. 
* Hey! What happens between me and my wife is nobody's business but mine, Sandra. 
* And she didn't make me get off the street. I happened to come home late one night, and I found her sitting in the dark staring at the wall. She had gotten into her head that I'd been killed. She thought I was a ghost and I had to chase her all over the house! 
* Some G.I. Joe gave an old geaser a heart attack at the Altmore Golf Course, and accosted a family right next door. He's wearing a surplus jacket, the kind you find at an Army Navy store. 
* Would you believe that I used to fish right out here. This very spot. Now they say &quot;Don't eat the fish, it's poisonous.&quot; And you can't even swim in the water, it'll give you some kind of bacterial infection. So, how's that for &quot;sick&quot;? 
* Everyone has their own idea of what they think paradise is. 
* You know, my wife was never was cut out for motherhood. She did it all for me. Went through all that pain, lost her figure, for me. Then the kid went to sleep one night and never woke up. They called it &quot;Infant death syndrome&quot;, but she wasn't an infant. It was very strange, cause she was 2 years old, she was a big girl. She was our baby. 
* Guys like you always say that. You don't know what you're gonna do until you do it. I think you knew exactly what you were going to do. You were gonna kill your wife and child! And then it would be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to turn the gun on yourself!
* Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner is drying out in the oven? Hey, they lie to everybody. They lie to the fish! But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special is your daughter.
* Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much.  

== Dialogue ==
[[File:US one dollar bill, obverse, series 2009.jpg|thumb|You think I'm a thief? No. See, I'm not the thief, I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a STINKING SODA! YOU'RE THE THIEF! I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer! I'm rolling prices back to 1965! What do you think of that?]]
[[File:Cheesburger 400 Lunch Combo, Flame 400 Burger Cafe Raine Square, 2026 (01).jpg|thumb|Rick, have you ever heard the expression &quot;The customer is always right&quot;?]]
[[File:Pohjoismaisen vastarintaliikkeen mielenosoitus 2018.jpg|thumb|We are not the same. I'm an American, you're a sick asshole.]]
[[File:Flag of the United States (DDD-F-416E specifications).svg|thumb|In America, we have the freedom of speech! The right to disagree!]]
[[File:(2) Cycle of abuse, power &amp; control issues in domestic abuse situations.gif|thumb|Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to kill your wife if she insults you?]]
[[File:NATO vs. Warsaw Pact (1949-1990).svg|thumb|Did you know I build missiles? I helped to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. But instead, they gave it to those plastic surgeons. They lied to me.]]
[[File:Los Angeles with Mount Baldy.jpg|thumb|It sure was hot today, wasn't it?]]
:'''Guy on freeway''': Hey! Where do you think you're going?! 
:'''William Foster''': I'm going home! 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [phone rings and Prendergast answers it] Prendergast here. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Hi. It's me. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Hi. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [holding a photo of her deceased daughter in her hand] I wish you'd come home. Wouldn't you come home now. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's wrong, baby? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': I don't know. I just...i got a little scared. And...i'd really like you to come home. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What is it, honey? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''':  Well...[starts crying] I don't know. I was just wrapping some...some glasses up and some things and I...I got...I got really scared. You're not doing this move just for me, are you? You really want to do it, don't you? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Look. The Important thing is we're together and that's what counts. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] Yeah, but you're not here.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': But I will be soon, baby. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] Say it. Say it. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll be home soon. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] No. Say it. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll be home soon and I love you. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': I love you, too. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Feel better? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] No, I don't feel better. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [gets out a snowglobe music box playing 'London Bridge is Falling Down'] No? Okay. &quot;London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down, London bridge is falling down&quot; Come on, help me. &quot;My Fair Lady&quot;
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [sings with Prendergast] My Fair Lady. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [laughs] You're my fair lady? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [giggles] Yes. Bye. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Bye-bye [hangs up the phone]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [phone rings and she answers it] Hello? [no answer] Hello? [still no answer] Cut the crap, I know it's you. What do you want? It is you, isn't it? 
:'''William Foster''': [on a payphone] Yeah. Yeah, it's me. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You got to stop calling me. 
:'''William Foster''': It's Adele's birthday. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yes, I know it's her birthday. What do you want? 
:'''William Foster''': I'm coming home. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': What are you talking about? 
:'''William Foster''': I just...I want to let you know that I'm coming home for her birthday. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You're not coming here. 
:'''William Foster''': Listen Beth. I got to see you. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': No. No you listen to me. This is my house now. I pay the rent. You don't even pay child support. You just can't walk in and out whenever you feel like. 
:'''William Foster''': Don't talk like that, Beth. I have to come home. I have to bring her present. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You know you can't come here. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 1''': Hey. Hey! [points that Foster is at the phonebooth] It's him! It's him, man! 
:'''William Foster''': How's Adele? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': This isn't your home anymore. 
:'''William Foster''': How is she? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': She's doing just fine without you. 
:'''Angie'': Come on, man. It's fucking broad daylight, man! This shit ain't worth it! 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Get the fuck out of the car now! [the gang start loading their weapons as Angie steps out of the car]
:'''William Foster''': And you? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Don't. I'll call the police if I have to. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Go, go, go! 
:'''William Foster''': I'm coming home, Beth. I'm coming home. [he hangs up, and the Mexican gang try to shoot Foster, but hits several bystanders instead, missing him]. 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''William Foster''': Hi. I'd like some breakfast.
:'''Rick''': We stopped serving breakfast.
:'''William Foster''': I know you stopped serving breakfast Rick, Sheila told me that you... why am I calling you by your first names? I don't even know you. I still call my boss 'Mister' even though I've been working with him for seven years, but all of a sudden I walk in here and I'm calling you Rick and Sheila like we're in some kind of AA meeting and... I don't want to be your buddy, Rick. I just want a little breakfast?
:'''Sheila''': You can call me Miss Folsom if you want.
:'''Rick''': ''Sheila''. We stopped serving breakfast at 11:30.
:''[Foster looks at his watch to find it's 3 minutes past the deadline. He places his gym bag full of guns on the counter.]''
:'''William Foster''': Rick, have you ever heard the expression &quot;the customer is always right&quot;?
:'''Rick''': ''[sighs]'' Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': Well, here I am. The customer.
:'''Rick''': ''[still smiling]'' That's not our policy. You'll have to order something from the lunch menu.
:'''William Foster''': I don't want ''lunch''. I want ''breakfast''.
:'''Rick''': Yeah, well hey, I'm really sorry.
:'''William Foster''': Yeah, well hey, I'm real sorry too. ''[pulls out a TEC-9]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Nick''': We're the same, you and me. We're the same. Don't you see?
:'''William Foster''': We are not the same. I'm an American. You're a sick asshole.
:'''Nick''': Just what kind of vigilante are you?
:'''William Foster''': I am not a vigilante. I am just trying to get home to my daughter's birthday party, and if everyone will just stay out of my way then nobody will get hurt.
:'''Nick''': Fuck you! Who the fuck are you? Are you fucking with me?
:'''William Foster''': I AM JUST DISAGREEING WITH YOU!!! In America, we have the freedom of speech, the right to disagree!
:'''Nick''': Fuck you and your freedom!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mrs. Foster''': [shows Prendergast and Torres her son's bedroom] This is his room. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You're a very neat and tidy lady. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Oh, he cleans his own room. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [jokingly] Now don't make me call you a liar. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': No. If he wasn't at work, i'd be afraid to set foot in here. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's he been doing lately? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Same as ever. [[w:Cold War|He's building important things to protect us from the communists]]. He works at NoTec. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': The defense plant? &quot;D-FENS&quot;. [to Torres] Why don't you call NoTec and see if you can get him on the line? [Torres leaves the room to call NoTec] So, what's going on with your son? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': What do you mean?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You know exactly what I mean? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': [becomes frightened] Sometimes he sits through an entire meal without saying a word. He just keeps shoveling food in his mouth like he's some kind of a machine, I get so nervous I can't swallow. I'll sit there with the same piece of food in my mouth. I just have to spit it out on the plate, and when I do, he looks at me like he would like to kill me. Don't tell him that I said that. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I promise, I won't. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': I try not to be a burden. I'm not just talking financial. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Now, how could you be a burden to anyone? Now if William, or Bill--
:'''Mrs. Foster''': He likes Bill. I call him Bill too. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': If Bill said he was going home, could he have meant where his wife and daughter live? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Ex-wife. We shouldn't be in here. [they leave Foster's old bedroom and head downstairs]
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Ex-wife, right? Elizabeth, what's her name again? Her maiden name? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Tavino. She was part Italian, you know it goes with them. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': So where's Elizabeth now? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': I wouldn't know. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You mean you don't know where your granddaughter lives? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': He doesn't want me to know where she is. He blames me for what happened. [Torres comes in, having just talked to NoTec on the phone]
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's the word? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': He was fired over a month ago. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': What? Well, where has he been going every day? Where has he been eating his lunch? 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''William Foster''': What kind of doctor lives here?
:'''The Caretaker''': Plastic surgeon.
:'''William Foster''': Plastic surgery bought this? Guess I'm in the wrong racket. Are there correspondence courses in plastic surgery? I lost my job. Actually, I didn't lose it, it lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled...Maybe it's the other way around, I forget. But, I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own daughter. [suddenly freaks out when he thinks he hurt the caretaker's daughter] Oh, jesus. I'm so sorry, honey! I didn't mean to hurt you! 
:'''The Caretaker''': No, no. It's your hand. You cut your hand. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, right. It's my hand. [sits down and bandages his hand]
:'''The Caretaker''': Please take me with you. 
:'''Caretaker's wife''': No! 
:'''The Caretaker''': They won't do anything as long as I'm with you. Just, please, let them go. 
:'''William Foster''': What do you think? You think I wanna hurt your family? I have a family of my own. You don't believe me? 
:'''Caretaker's wife''': We believe you. 
:'''William Foster''': That's where I'm going. I'm going home to see my family. It's my little girl's birthday today. We were going to have a barbecue like you guys, and she was going to play outside, my wife would hold my hand, and we'd talk about grown up things. And then when it got dark, we'd all [[w:Familicide|go to sleep together.]] We'd all sleep together in the dark. And everything will be just like it was before. [Foster starts crying] 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What were you going to do?
:'''William Foster''': I don't know, I don't know what I'm going to do.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Guys like you always say that. You don't know what you're gonna do until you do it. I think you knew exactly what you were going to do. You were gonna kill your wife and child!
:'''William Foster''': No
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah, and then it would be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to turn the gun on yourself! Now let's go meet some nice policemen. They're good guys. Come on, let's go.
:'''William Foster''': I'm the bad guy?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': How did that happen? I did everything they told me to. Did you know I build missiles?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': I helped to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. But instead they gave it to the plastic surgeons. They lied to me.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner's drying out in the oven? Hey! They lie to everybody, they lie to the fish. But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special, is your daughter. Now let's go. Let's go!
:'''William Foster''': [accepting that Prendergast is right] It sure was hot today, wasn't it? You know, I got a gun. In my pocket. [turns around to face Prendergast] I got lots of guns. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Stay there. Don't move. 
:'''William Foster''': Wanna draw? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Let's not. Let's call it a day. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, come on. It's perfect. A showdown between the sheriff and the bad guy? It's beautiful. On three. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': This doesn't have to be the end, Bill. You have a choice. My daughter is dead. I don't have a choice. You have a choice. 
:'''William Foster''': No, you have two choices. I can kill you, or you can kill me and my daughter can get the insurance. One. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Don't you want to see her grow up? 
:'''William Foster''': Behind bars? Two. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Don't do this. Please. LET'S GO! 
:'''William Foster''': Three (Foster pulls out a water pistol from his pocket, and Prendergast shoots Foster in the chest) I would've got you. (Foster falls off the railing and into the water below. Prendergast looks over the railing at Foster floating dead in the water, feeling bad that he just killed him)
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Reporter''': What cooperation was there between Pacific Division and Downtown? 
:'''Captain Yardley''': Not to denegrate the Venice police department, but it was one of our fellows that put this thing together. Prendergast. This is Sergeant Prendergast. [Prendergast shakes Yardley's hand in front of reporters] Damn fine work. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much. 
:'''Captain Yardley''': You're welcome. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [to Torres on a stretcher for her gunshot wound in the stomach] You still here? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': [jokingly] Afraid so. 
:'''EMT''': We've stabilized her, we're taking her in now. She'll be alright. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll see you at the hospital. [Torres gets taken in the ambulance. Prendergast approaches Elizabeth on the front porch to check if she and Adele are okay] How are you doing? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': I haven't told her yet. Oh shit. [notices a bunch of families with kids with birthday presents] It's her birthday. What should I do? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Tell her tomorrow. Let her have her little party. [Elizabeth leaves] What's your name, darling? 
:'''Adele Foster''': Adele. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [sits down on the front porch next to Adele] Adele? That's a nice name. If I had a little girl, i'd want her to be named Adele. 
:'''Adele Foster''': What's yours? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Mine? My name is &quot;Mud&quot;. 
:'''Adele Foster''': No, you're name's not &quot;Mud&quot;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Well, it will be when my wife finds out that...i'm still a cop. 
== About ''{{PAGENAME}}'' ==
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|I came up with that he worked at a defense plant, because reading about defense workers who had been laid off, because the United States was downsizing their defense programs, because the [[w:Soviet Union|USSR]] had recently [[w:Dissolution of the Soviet Union|gone kaput]], and that threat was no longer there, and the irony of that interested me, that here’s a guy who is protecting America, who was creating things that protected America, and he was essentially fired for doing too good of a job. ~ Ebbe Roe Smith]]
[[File:Bush Gorba P15623-25A.jpg|thumb|You kind of have to remember the setting and the time. It was the end of the Cold War. And all of the major defense industry plants were all based here in L.A. and when the wall came down and the Cold War ended. All these people in the defense industry were given their pink slips and weren't needed anymore. So, Falling Down told the story about an American whose life began to fall apart. ~ [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]]]
[[File:LA Riots - aftermath (159598182).jpg|thumb|I always thought this picture was closer to a pulse than we thought, in the sort of, tensions that existed at that time. While we were shooting the picture, the [[w:Rodney King|Rodney King]] [[w:1992 Los Angeles riots|riots]] happened. ~ [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]]]
[[File:Alfa Romeo Stelvio QV 1X7A7063.jpg|thumb|With the car culture, you're able to go from one segment of this society to another in a flash. Now, a lot of the times you're going to miss it because you're in a car. What happens to Foster is that he gets out of the car, and all of a sudden he's confronted with it because of the ground. He's moving through it. He's become part of it at that point. ~ Ebbe Roe Smith]]
* Falling Down first came to me through a news item that happened on the L.A. freeway system, where there was a big rude trucker who suddenly started to ram people and shove them off the road as he was driving. And I just became fascinated with, what was the mental process of this guy and what made him snap? And how did he end up getting there, crossing this line? I had a fantasy where this guy is in a huge truck and all of these people are getting in his way trying to cut him off and he’s not getting to where he wants to go. And suddenly, he decided, “I don’t have to take it. I’m in a huge truck.” so he snapped and started shoving these people off. The idea fascinated me that where do you cross the line when all of a sudden, the rules don’t apply. And that was the origin of it. When it came time to pick what William Foster was doing for a living, I came up with that he worked at a defense plant, because reading about defense workers who had been laid off, because the United States was downsizing their defense programs, because the [[w:Soviet Union|USSR]] had recently [[w:Dissolution of the Soviet Union|gone kaput]],  and that threat was no longer there, and the irony of that interested me, that here’s a guy who is protecting America, who was creating things that protected America, and he was essentially fired for doing too good of a job. Of course, now all of that is gone, the world has flipped around, we have a whole different set of rules and fears. William Foster was a guy who played by the rules all of the time and was punished for it, in his mind. - Ebbe Roe Smith. 
* When I created this character of William Foster, it sort of happened backwards, in that the point that the guy broke is where it started. As a script, and as an idea, and as a concept. So I had to work backwards to from there to create the character who drove up to this point and then snapped. Then once you had that, it was a process of just looking at the city and deciding what pissed me off about it, and putting this guy through these things and expressing them that way. The thing about the things which annoyed Foster in this movie are, they're normal things. Here's a guy who's not annoyed because his wife was killed by someone, he's speaking for every man as he goes through this day. And they're little normal things which annoy people which come up against him, and which also annoyed me. And that's what I sought out when I thought about the path that he takes. And I got out a map a lot, and checked it out and tried to work out this pathway that he took from downtown Los Angeles to Santa Monica where he would pop up here and there. And I tried to construct the script around those areas, which came up. [[Los Angeles]] is a melting pot. It's a place where cultures come up against each other. Money cultures, against poor cultures, class, race, they're all living right next to each other, and they have a tendency to rub up each other at various times. And with the car culture, you're able to go from one segment of this society to another in a flash. Now, a lot of the times you're going to miss it because you're in a car. What happens to Foster is that he gets out of the car, and all of a sudden he's confronted with it because of the ground. He's moving through it. He's become part of it at that point. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* For me, a really interesting part of the film was the mystery aspect. On one level, it was a straight out, mystery, a crime solving. And weaving the elements of Prendergast trying to solve this crime with what was happening, was one of the most fascinating things to me about it, and took it away from the pure societal commentary that was going on. The thing about the Prendergast character that i've always loved is he's a cop who can't stop being a policeman. He has a mystery, and he has to solve it. And it doesn't matter if it's his last day, it doesn't matter if everyone doesn't believe in him, he just can't give it up. In a very quiet focused way. You know, he does rebel against the forces that are coming at him in the police department, their attitude that he's a coward and his choice of not being on the street. But, I think it’s more than that, I think it’s a deeper thing in his character, is that he just can't stop. He can't stop a mystery because he is who he is, he's a policeman. So, i don't think that his motivation comes from a rebellion against the authority of the police department. It's a motivation that comes from deep within him, that is deeper than a rebellion against the forces coming at him. Although, I suppose there is a certain aspect of that to it. But more importantly, it's the simple character of the detective who can't stop searching out a crime. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* To me, one of the most compelling things about Falling Down when I read it, was that Ebbe Roe Smith had created these two characters: William Foster (Michael Douglas) and Martin Prendergast (Robert Duvall). And they're on this parallel course and do not meet til the last second of the movie. But to me, they were two sides of a coin, or more importantly two sides of our own psyche, in the sense that Foster is the part of us that fantasizes about walking out of our car in a traffic jam, about pulling out a gun if you don't get things you want, about righting some wrong on the street because we feel that we're justified. And Prendergast is the part of us that must find compassion, find forgiveness, mush through, shlog through this life trying to keep a sense of humor. There's a reason why these two men are in this story together, it's not just bad guy/good guy. It's an examination of our own spirit. The reason I decided to do Falling Down was because I thought it worked on so many levels. I thought, it was an psychological thriller on one level, almost like an old fashioned Western. You have a bad guy tearing up the town, and “will the old sheriff put on his guns and his badge and go find him.” I also thought it was a moral tale, a parable about these two men's lives during these eight hours. So it had that mythic fable feeling to it, which i love in movies. And then of course it had the political, social, economic layers all woven through it with a dark absurdist comedy, which I think life is really like. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* It's about a man who wakes up one morning, and the America that he has been sold. He doesn't know who he is anymore. Because he's suddenly in a city where it's a multicultural, multilingual world, and he doesn't fit in, in his mind, because he's an unbalanced person to begin with. Because, many people of all races, ages, socioeconomic backgrounds, many times in our lifetime we feel we're strangers in a strange land. But we don't wind up pulling guns. To me, William Foster always represented the man who does walk into McDonald's and shoots up people, but all the neighbors say he was so nice, he was so quiet. Cause it's never really [[w:Jeffrey Dahmer|Jeffrey Dahmer]], it's never the monster. It's really the guy next door. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* William Foster is clearly out of control before the movie starts. It's something i'm surprised the audience has not picked up on more. You've been hearing all this controversy about the social responsibility of this film. This man is nuts. He is out of his mind. Not anybody I know stops his car on a freeway in traffic and walks away from his car. The writer, Ebbe Roe Smith, purposely had that opening scene to establish a red light. This man has lost it. And so the movie is actually a spiral of decline from that moment, so he is gone when the movie starts, from other circumstances, some of which we find out, some we will never know. One of the things that people are enjoying about this movie is the enjoyment of watching a man not responsible for his actions because he's unable to be responsible for his actions. You pay a consequence for that as we find out in the movie. I think for the normal person having a sense of guilt is being aware, but guilt is a human feeling. Animals don't have guilt. Guilt is something that we have created as human beings, animals don't know anything about guilt. But it has to do with our brains, thinking if we are responsible. Again, Foster has no sense of anything except the present moment at this time. He has broken a couple of wires in his head and only deals with what is going on at that moment, so he doesn't have a sense of guilt, or really a sense of, as he says in the climax “I'm the bad guy?” He doesn't have a sense of responsibility. - [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]
* I feel that Falling Down is imitating the 6:00 news. And unfortunately, it's mild. Because it is one man's deterioration in an 8 hour period. And unfortunately when you turn on the news, you see many stories of violence, all violence is horrific and destructive to our society. And, in Falling Down, I tried to show that acting out one's violence, even though it may seem justified in certain situations, and even humorous, is not an option. It doesn't work. What I tried most importantly to do, was to put a face and a soul into that 6:00 news story. Where you see a seemingly ordinary hard working family man who snaps right in front of you. And he creates a terrible act of violence against his own family, against his co-workers, against random people in the street. And then you always see the neighbors standing around saying “I don't understand how this happened because he was such a nice guy.” And I think in those moments, unlike serial killers where we look at them and we realize that we're seeing somebody that's so insane, I think when the 6:00 news story is about one of those people, those seemingly ordinary people who snaps, that we all look to ourselves and say “That's one of us. That's someone just like you and me who couldn't take it any longer.” And that's what I feel Falling Down is really about. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* I've always thought, thematically, this film is about where the extra ordinary meets the ordinary. And it's a familiar theme in literature and in film. A lot of times it's where the ordinary man meets an extra ordinary circumstance and has to deal with it. In this case, it's flipped around. It's where an extra ordinary man is meeting up with an ordinary circumstance, which is the climate that he's walking through, the city. And what makes him extra ordinary is his fearlessness, he's crossed a line and no longer fears the consequences of his actions. And I've always thought that, in a way, this is a kind of superpower that a person could have. A person who is not afraid to die has a superpower, and they're really hard to stop. And that is something that we're experiencing today. And also that's what the theme was of William Foster. I didn't do a lot of research for the character, because he's myself written large. So, it was a matter of projecting myself into this position of a person who feels that they've done everything right, and yet they're getting shafted. And add to this tendency to violence, which is something which has been kept tamped down for most of his life, it's only come out dribs and drabs here and there. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* I feel that the characters in the film that William Foster encounters were not specifically chosen to in any way criticize or cartoon the people. In a movie like this, it could've gone on for 50 hours, and there could've been all kinds of incidents (gas station, bus stop, train). What the writer Ebbe Roe Smith chose were things that we felt were typical to an ordinary day in LA. And I think that they represent frustrations, ordinary frustrations. Not complex unusual extraordinary ones. But simple everyday ones that we all have to deal with in a healthy way. And Foster is incapable of dealing with them. I mean, in the Korean grocery store, he could've easily just paid for the soda and walked out, but he can't because his psyche is evaporating. I think Foster is in a sense a dinosaur. Because the fact that he can't deal with the rules, the multicultural society, the injustices and problems if everyday life, don't make him right and them wrong. Also, they're not going to change for him, just as they're not going to change for us. Perhaps in the voting booth, our vote counts. But in day to day situations our vote doesn't count. When they tell you that they stopped serving breakfast at 11:30, and you still want your breakfast, your vote doesn't count. Now, it would be nice to pull out a machine gun, and get your breakfast. But we don't do that. The reason we don't do that is because, as wish fulfilling as that moment is, like Foster, we would cross a line. And once you cross that line, there's no going back. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* I think, it may be hard for people to remember or maybe they were too young, but the temperature in Los Angeles at that time, you know, [[w:1992 Los Angeles riots|the riots]] broke out right in the middle of shooting. The tension, the racial tension in the streets and the economic tension, you know, [[w:George H.W. Bush|Bush Sr.]] was the president, we were in a recession, there was bad stuff really going down, bad stuff legally, a real &quot;Fuck you!&quot; to a lot of people in the United States, especially the ones who couldn't fight for themselves. And I think you can see the anger brewing and then when the [[w:Rodney King|Rodney King]] verdict went down, we were on all the streets of L.A. obviously making Falling Down, and when you make a movie on the streets of any city, you have local police that protect you and help you. And movie police are great. They've seen it all, they've done it all, and they're so helpful, you can't make a movie without them because you're really in the way of every city when you're making a movie there. They told us weeks before the verdict that if it went down, so that the cops got away with it, there was going to be blood in the streets. And all of the black church leaders were begging for some kind of compassion because they said there was going to be blood in the streets, and when that verdict came down, and you saw what happened, and you know, there was a city in flames. It was, you know, rioting, and looting, and insanity going on in the city. And we knew it was going to happen. In fact, the cops got us home the minute that verdict went home, we stopped shooting. We were supposed to be in Inglewood, which was right in the heart of where the riots were happening. It would have been very hard to get a movie company out of there. But then we went right back two days later, we went right back on those streets, and shot, and people were great to us. A lot of the people you see in all the scenes in the movie are the people in that neighborhood that we were shooting in at the time, because I didn't want the street scenes to seem inauthentic, so we used a lot of the local people. We were supposed to be in Inglewood shooting the Whammy Burger scene, but the cops told us not to go there cause they knew what was going to happen if the verdict came down, so we were on the Warner Bros back lot doing close ups of Michael, and then the riots broke out. And of course, you know, everyone on the crew had spouses at work, had children in school, so they got us out and they told everybody to go home immediately. And I raced home over in Mulholland and then saw it on TV because I live in Bel-Air so by the time I got to Bel-Air the city of LA was on fire. And yeah it was an amazing thing to watch, you could see the hate and the venom and the outrage of the unfairness of the people who were rioting, you could see the unfairness of their life on the planet and in this city and how it was all coming out in this moment. Do I think they were all right to do that? No. But do I understand where it came from? Sure. Absolutely. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* The LA Times did 7 pieces against Falling Down. They were so outraged by this movie. They actually had someone walk that route across Los Angeles, and nothing happened to them. I loved all that, that was great. That actually made the movie a success, the outrage. They had defense workers picketing saying they weren't like that. There were doors that were closed to me that certainly flew open after Falling Down, and still do. There were a lot of people that looked at me as a much more serious filmmaker. I had made a lot of movies up to that point with very young cast, a lot of them unknown. And even though i'm very proud of those movies, and those casts, and even though I think they're about something, a lot of times when you make movies with young people, they're not taking it seriously. You know, there are people that have a lot of respect for the film. And that means a lot to me. But, I didn't do it for those reasons. It also made a lot of trouble. It's amazing to be talking about it after so many years, that it still has weight. But I think all of that credit belongs to Ebbe Roe Smith. I had one of the greatest casts in the world, they did a brilliant job, all that credit belongs to them. Andrzej Bartkowiak did a great job shooting it. Barbara Ling did a great job bringing Los Angeles to life, she was our production designer. Marlene Stewart was our costume designer. And even thought in a contemporary film those jobs seem invisible, they're there and they did it. But it's Ebbe Roe Smith's writing. When he created this character, it hit a nerve in him, it hit a nerve in all of us who made it. And it obviously hit a nerve in the audience, even the people that were outraged by the movie, there's no bigger nerve hitting than outrage. Ebbe was a first time writer, and he's an actor. And I think that one of the reasons Falling Down hit a nerve with me when I read it, with everyone who read it. And all the wonderful cast that came to do it, but ultimately the public, and a lot of the press which was positive and negative, but I think the reason Falling Down still resonates is because of Ebbe Roe Smith's wonderful script. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* Falling Down, I think, if anything it's about, maybe, the point of views, and the problem that strife in society happens when you're unable to appreciate the point of view of another person. You're unable to put yourself in their shoes. You lock yourself off away from that. And people start wars over it. I think it’s a lot of that. Compromising is the secret to a society, and when people start to shut themselves off from it, then there's only one place that energy can go, and it's into a negative space, into a negative area. And it hardens opinion, and nothing is done. Nothing is pushed forward. The walls are built up, and there's no place for that energy to go but to a bad place. - Ebbe Roe Smith

== Cast ==
* [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]] - William Foster
* [[w:Robert Duvall|Robert Duvall]] - Sgt. Martin Prendergast
* [[w:Barbara Hershey|Barbara Hershey]] - Elizabeth Tavino
* [[w:Rachel Ticotin|Rachel Ticotin]] - Det. Sandra Torres
* [[w:Tuesday Weld|Tuesday Weld]] - Amanda Prendergast
* [[w:Frederic Forrest|Frederic Forrest]] - Nick, the army surplus store owner
* [[w:Lois Smith|Lois Smith]] - William Foster's mother
* Joey Hope Singer - Adele Foster-Tavino
* [[w:Michael Paul Chan|Michael Paul Chan]] - Mr. Lee, the convenience store owner
* [[w:Raymond J. Barry|Raymond J. Barry]] - Capt. William Yardley
* [[w:D. W. Moffett|D. W. Moffett]] - Det. Lydecker
* [[w:Steve Park (comedian)|Steve Park]] - Detective Brian
* [[w:Karina Arroyave|Karina Arroyave]] - Angie
* [[w:Brent Hinkley|Brent Hinkley]] - Rick
* [[w:Dedee Pfeiffer|Dedee Pfeiffer]] - Sheila Folsom

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0106856}}
* {{amg movie|16651}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|falling_down}}
* {{metacritic film|falling-down|Falling Down}}

[[Category:1993 films]]
[[Category:1990s American films]]
[[Category:Crime thriller films]]
[[Category:Films set in Los Angeles]]
[[Category:Vigilante films]]
[[Category:Action thriller films]]
[[Category:Films about consumerism]]</text>
      <sha1>ax0zupjyrw62oqthk8x1h98qwsrknmh</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965140</id>
      <parentid>3965083</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:28:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39418-37</username>
        <id>3349651</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I added more quotes from the phone calls.</comment>
      <origin>3965140</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="54171" sha1="bwpg3kddyr61mp7l70v6o8v4f9l1n5k" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Michael Douglas César 2016 3.jpg|thumb|I lost my job. Actually, I didn't lose it, it lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled...Maybe it's the other way around, I forget. But, I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own daughter.]]
'''''[[w:Falling Down|Falling Down]]''''' is a [[w:1993 in film|1993 drama film]] about laid-off defense worker who is enraged by a traffic jam and rampages across Los Angeles as a police sergeant searches for purpose on his retirement day.
:''Directed by [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]. Written by [[w:Ebbe Roe Smith|Ebbe Roe Smith]].''
{{center/s}}'''A Tale Of Urban Reality.'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]{{center/e}}

==William Foster==
* ''[While destroying merchandise in a Korean owned grocery store]'' You think I'm a thief? No. See, I'm not the thief, I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a STINKING SODA! YOU'RE THE THIEF! I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer! I'm rolling prices back to 1965! What do you think of that? 

* Okay. Okay. I was willing to mind my own business. I was willing to respect your territory and treat you like a man, but you couldn't leave it alone, could you? You couldn't let a man sit here for 5 minutes and take a rest on your precious piece of shit hill?! 

* Why have you put barbed wire on a fence? Is this how you rich people amuse yourselves? You put barbed wire on the fence so innocent people like me can hurt our hands looking in, huh?

* I lost my job. Actually I didn't lose it. It lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled. Maybe it's the other way around. I forget, but I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own kid.

* I am not a vigilante. I'm just trying to get home to my daughter's birthday. If everyone will stay out of my way, then nobody will get hurt. 

* What the hell are you trying to do? Kill me with the golf ball? IS THAT ENOUGH, YOU GOT ALL THESE BEAUTIFUL ACRES FENCING FOR YOUR LITTLE GAME, BUT YOU OUGHT TO KILL ME WITH THE GOLF BALL!? You should have children playing here! You should have FAMILIES HAVING PICNICS! YOU SHOULD HAVE A GODDAMN PETTING ZOO!! Instead you got these stupid carts for you old men with nothing better to do!!!

* I've passed the point of no return, Beth. You know when that is? That's the point in a journey where it's longer to go back to the beginning than it is to continue to the end. It's like...Do you remember when [[w:Apollo 13|those astronauts got in trouble when they were going to the moon]] and something went wrong? I don't know, somebody screwed up and they had to get them back to Earth, but they had passed the point of no return. So, they had to go all the way around the moon to get back, and they were out of contact for hours. Everybody waited breathlessly to see if a bunch of dead guys in a can would pop out the other side, and that's me. I'm on the other side of the moon now, out of contact, and everybody's just going to have to wait until I pop out.

* Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to [[w:Uxoricide|kill your wife if she insults you?]]

* I wanna know what's wrong with the street. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, I think you're just trying to justify your inflated budgets! 

*It's my little girl's birthday today. We were going to have a barbecue like you guys, and she was going to play outside, my wife would hold my hand, and we'd talk about grown up things. And then when it got dark, we'd all [[w:Familicide|go to sleep together.]] We'd all sleep together in the dark. And everything will be just like it was before.

== Martin Prendergast ==
[[File:Robert Duvall 2 by David Shankbone.jpg|thumb|Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner's drying out in the oven? Hey! They lie to everybody, they lie to the fish. But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special, is your daughter.]]
* Martin Prendergast. Downtown robbery. Let's go. 
* Genuine Santa Monica sand's more like it. 
* You mean he stole your baseball bat but he paid for the soda? Oh, this guy's discriminating. 
* What would a guy in a white shirt and tie be doing in gangland?
* Sandra, you have a career. It's not easy to see your beauty go and that's all you got. 
* Now, if you go up against this guy, be careful. 
* Me? I'm a coward, the captain just told me. 
* Hey! What happens between me and my wife is nobody's business but mine, Sandra. 
* And she didn't make me get off the street. I happened to come home late one night, and I found her sitting in the dark staring at the wall. She had gotten into her head that I'd been killed. She thought I was a ghost and I had to chase her all over the house! 
* Some G.I. Joe gave an old geaser a heart attack at the Altmore Golf Course, and accosted a family right next door. He's wearing a surplus jacket, the kind you find at an Army Navy store. 
* Would you believe that I used to fish right out here. This very spot. Now they say &quot;Don't eat the fish, it's poisonous.&quot; And you can't even swim in the water, it'll give you some kind of bacterial infection. So, how's that for &quot;sick&quot;? 
* Everyone has their own idea of what they think paradise is. 
* You know, my wife was never was cut out for motherhood. She did it all for me. Went through all that pain, lost her figure, for me. Then the kid went to sleep one night and never woke up. They called it &quot;Infant death syndrome&quot;, but she wasn't an infant. It was very strange, cause she was 2 years old, she was a big girl. She was our baby. 
* Guys like you always say that. You don't know what you're gonna do until you do it. I think you knew exactly what you were going to do. You were gonna kill your wife and child! And then it would be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to turn the gun on yourself!
* Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner is drying out in the oven? Hey, they lie to everybody. They lie to the fish! But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special is your daughter.
* Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much.  

== Dialogue ==
[[File:US one dollar bill, obverse, series 2009.jpg|thumb|You think I'm a thief? No. See, I'm not the thief, I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a STINKING SODA! YOU'RE THE THIEF! I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer! I'm rolling prices back to 1965! What do you think of that?]]
[[File:Cheesburger 400 Lunch Combo, Flame 400 Burger Cafe Raine Square, 2026 (01).jpg|thumb|Rick, have you ever heard the expression &quot;The customer is always right&quot;?]]
[[File:Pohjoismaisen vastarintaliikkeen mielenosoitus 2018.jpg|thumb|We are not the same. I'm an American, you're a sick asshole.]]
[[File:Flag of the United States (DDD-F-416E specifications).svg|thumb|In America, we have the freedom of speech! The right to disagree!]]
[[File:(2) Cycle of abuse, power &amp; control issues in domestic abuse situations.gif|thumb|Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to kill your wife if she insults you?]]
[[File:NATO vs. Warsaw Pact (1949-1990).svg|thumb|Did you know I build missiles? I helped to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. But instead, they gave it to those plastic surgeons. They lied to me.]]
[[File:Los Angeles with Mount Baldy.jpg|thumb|It sure was hot today, wasn't it?]]
:'''Guy on freeway''': Hey! Where do you think you're going?! 
:'''William Foster''': I'm going home! 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [phone rings and Prendergast answers it] Prendergast here. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Hi. It's me. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Hi. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [holding a photo of her deceased daughter in her hand] I wish you'd come home. Wouldn't you come home now. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's wrong, baby? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': I don't know. I just...i got a little scared. And...i'd really like you to come home. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What is it, honey? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''':  Well...[starts crying] I don't know. I was just wrapping some...some glasses up and some things and I...I got...I got really scared. You're not doing this move just for me, are you? You really want to do it, don't you? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Look. The Important thing is we're together and that's what counts. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] Yeah, but you're not here.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': But I will be soon, baby. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] Say it. Say it. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll be home soon. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] No. Say it. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll be home soon and I love you. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': I love you, too. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Feel better? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] No, I don't feel better. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [gets out a snowglobe music box playing 'London Bridge is Falling Down'] No? Okay. &quot;London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down, London bridge is falling down&quot; Come on, help me. &quot;My Fair Lady&quot;
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [sings with Prendergast] My Fair Lady. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [laughs] You're my fair lady? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [giggles] Yes. Bye. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Bye-bye [hangs up the phone]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [phone rings and she answers it] Hello? [no answer] Hello? [still no answer] Cut the crap, I know it's you. What do you want? It is you, isn't it? 
:'''William Foster''': [on a payphone] Yeah. Yeah, it's me. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You got to stop calling me. 
:'''William Foster''': It's Adele's birthday. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yes, I know it's her birthday. What do you want? 
:'''William Foster''': I'm coming home. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': What are you talking about? 
:'''William Foster''': I just...I want to let you know that I'm coming home for her birthday. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You're not coming here. 
:'''William Foster''': Listen Beth. I got to see you. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': No. No you listen to me. This is my house now. I pay the rent. You don't even pay child support. You just can't walk in and out whenever you feel like. 
:'''William Foster''': Don't talk like that, Beth. I have to come home. I have to bring her present. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You know you can't come here. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 1''': Hey. Hey! [points that Foster is at the phonebooth] It's him! It's him, man! 
:'''William Foster''': How's Adele? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': This isn't your home anymore. 
:'''William Foster''': How is she? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': She's doing just fine without you. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Get out of the car! 
:'''Angie''': Come on, man. It's fucking broad daylight, man! This shit ain't worth it! 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Get the fuck out of the car now! [the gang start loading their weapons as Angie steps out of the car]
:'''William Foster''': And you? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Don't. I'll call the police if I have to. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Go, go, go! 
:'''William Foster''': I'm coming home, Beth. I'm coming home. [he hangs up, and the Mexican gang try to shoot Foster, but hits several bystanders instead, missing him]. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You sure you don't want something? Coffee, soda, something? 
:'''Officer Springer''': No thank you, ma'am. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': I feel kind of stupid about this whole thing. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Better safe than sorry. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yeah that's what I thought. 
:'''Officer Springer''': You have a restraining order against your husband?
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Ex-husband. Yeah, he'd show up on the wrong day, or in the middle of the night pounding on the door, stuff like that. Thing is. He has this horrendous temper and I just didn't know if a restraining order was a good idea and if it'd do more harm than good. But the judge said we should make an example of him. So he can't come within 100 feet of us. Or is it yards? Which is it? Feet or yards? 
:'''Officer Springer''': That's up to the judge. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Really? I thought it was a set thing. 
:'''Officer Springer''': No, it's at his discretion. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': That's interesting. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Does he drink? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [pause] Oh, I thought you meant the judge. No, I wouldn't say so. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Do drugs? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Oh, no. 
:'''Officer Springer''': But he has a propensity for violence? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yeah, I think you can say that. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Did he strike the little girl? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Well, no. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Did he strike you? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Not exactly. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Not exactly? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You know, there were times when I thought he was going to. But i just didn't want until he got around to it. It's hard to explain. He could, I think. 
:'''Officer Springer''': You think? 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Vagrant''': Hello sir. How are you today. 
:'''William Foster''': I'm doing alright. How about you? 
:'''Vagrant''': Me? I'm terrible. 
:'''William Foster''': Sorry to hear that. 
:'''Vagrant''': Yeah. I came down from Santa Barbara yesterday and this friend of mine wasn't home like I thought he was going to be and he owes me some money. So, i thought I had some money to get back home with. I'm almost out of gas. I had to sleep in my car last night. I don't suppose you have a couple of bucks you could give me. It would really help me out. If you give me your address I'll mail it back, honest. 
:'''William Foster''': Let me see your driver's license. 
:'''Vagrant''': What do you want to see my driver's license for? 
:'''William Foster''': Well, if your from Santa Barbara it would have your address on it. I want it. 
:'''Vagrant''': I don't have a driver's license. 
:'''William Foster''': You mean you drove all the way from Santa Barbara without a license? 
:'''Vagrant''': Are you a cop? 
:'''William Foster''': Let me see your car registration. A matter of fact, let me see your car. 
:'''Vagrant''': Alright, forget it. Okay, just forget it. That's a hell of a way to treat a &quot;vet&quot;, man! 
:'''William Foster''': You're an animal doctor? 
:'''Vagrant''': No. I vet. A veteran. I was in [[w:Vietnam War|Nam]]. 
:'''William Foster''': What were you, a drummer boy? You must've been 10 years old. 
:'''Vagrant''': I mean the [[w:Gulf War|Gulf]], I meant to say the Gulf. Jesus! Come on! All I'm asking for is a little change I haven't eaten in 3 days. [realizing he's eating a sandwich in his hand] I mean...except for this. Fuck it! Give me some money, man! Just give me some money! 
:'''William Foster''': No. 
:'''Vagrant''': How much change is in your pocket? I don't care if it's a dime. Give it to me. 
:'''William Foster''': I'm not giving you any money. 
:'''Vagrant''': You got a cigarette? 
:'''William Foster''': I don't smoke. 
:'''Vagrant''': Oh, you got to give me something. 
:'''William Foster''': Why don't you try to get a job? 
:'''Vagrant''': Hey! This is my park, I live here! Who the fuck are you walking through my park carrying two bags?! You got two bags, I don't got any. Is that fair?! What's in those bags? [Foster grips his bag of guns tightly, seemingly intending to kill him] Give me one of those bags. I could sell those bags and eat for a week with the money. You got two of them, why do you need two of them? 
:'''William Foster''': You're right. Here. [gives his briefcase to the vagrant]
:'''Vagrant''': Are you serious?
:'''William Foster''': I don't need it anymore. 
:'''Vagrant''': Alright! [opens up the briefcase. Only to discover it only contains a sandwich, two carrotsticks and an apple. The vagrant throws the apple out of disappointment as Foster walks away] Son of a bitch! 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''William Foster''': Hi. I'd like some breakfast.
:'''Rick''': We stopped serving breakfast.
:'''William Foster''': I know you stopped serving breakfast Rick, Sheila told me that you... why am I calling you by your first names? I don't even know you. I still call my boss 'Mister' even though I've been working with him for seven years, but all of a sudden I walk in here and I'm calling you Rick and Sheila like we're in some kind of AA meeting and... I don't want to be your buddy, Rick. I just want a little breakfast?
:'''Sheila''': You can call me Miss Folsom if you want.
:'''Rick''': ''Sheila''. We stopped serving breakfast at 11:30.
:''[Foster looks at his watch to find it's 3 minutes past the deadline. He places his gym bag full of guns on the counter.]''
:'''William Foster''': Rick, have you ever heard the expression &quot;the customer is always right&quot;?
:'''Rick''': ''[sighs]'' Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': Well, here I am. The customer.
:'''Rick''': ''[still smiling]'' That's not our policy. You'll have to order something from the lunch menu.
:'''William Foster''': I don't want ''lunch''. I want ''breakfast''.
:'''Rick''': Yeah, well hey, I'm really sorry.
:'''William Foster''': Yeah, well hey, I'm real sorry too. ''[pulls out a TEC-9]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt; 
:'''Officer Springer''': Ma'am, we're gonna take off now. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You are? Really? 
:'''Officer Springer''': It doesn't look like your husband's gonna show. What would probably happen was he came to his senses that he realize he could get into a lot of trouble if he harassed you. What I think you should do is call your lawyer and tell him about it. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Well, it's one of those services. I didn't have much money. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Well, call them. And tell them to call your husband's lawyer. Make it official. In the meantime, lock up. And if anything else happens, give us a call. 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [phone rings and Prendergast answers it] Yeah, Prendergast. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Hi, it's me. He's eating and resting comfortably now. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Who is? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Mr. Peepers. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Good. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Honey, I'm sorry about before. I really blew my top. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': That's okay, honey [Torres starts calling] Can you hold on just one second? [switches to Torres] Prendergast. 
:'''Sandra Torres''': [at the Whammyburger] White shirt and tie. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Sandra, could you hold on one second? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': I gotta go. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': No, just one second. It's very important. [switches to Amanda] 
:'''Lydecker''': Detective Torres! Excuse me! We have about 7 million people out here waiting to make a statement! 
:'''Sandra Torres''': I'm on the phone! 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [to Amanda] Hon, let me call your right back. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': What's wrong? What are you doing? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Nothing's wrong. Not doing anything. What do you mean? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Well, you can come home then. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I can't. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': It's your last day. What are they gonna do, fire you? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': There's a lot of red tape, the sooner I get done the sooner i'll get home. I'll call you in a while, okay. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Wait a minute. Make a list. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': A list? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': We need boneless chicken, skinless. Red peppers. Not green, red. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Honey. Hold on one second. [switches to Torres] Sandra
:'''Sandra Torres''': I am tying up the phone here. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Just listen for once in your life. Now a gang girl at the drive by said that a man in a white shirt and tie attacked her homeboys with a baseball bat. Now I think somebody's let their dog off the leash. 
:'''Sandra Torres''': I think you got &quot;last day-itis&quot;. This man was not swinging a baseball bat, he has a gym bag full of guns.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': A gym bag? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': Look, you asked me to tell you what he was wearing. I gotta run. The lieutenants wants the canvass the neighborhood. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Sandra, just one more second. Please it's important. [switches to Amanda] Hon, why don't you go to the store? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Why? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': It's my last day, the guys might want to have a send off or something. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': What are they gonna do? Get some broad with tassels dangling from her tits, dancing on her desk? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Of course not. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Look, buster. While you've been there playing cop, i'm at home planning your retirement. It's over. The sooner you get that through your head the better. You are no longer in the law enforcement business. Now, I will at the usual time, capito? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [switches to Torres] Sandra, are you mad at me? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': No, I hate you but I'm not mad. 
:'''Lydecker''': [rudely to Torres] Are you retiring as well, too?
:'''Sandra Torres''': Just don't leave without saying goodbye. 
:'''Lydecker''': [rudely to Torres] Goodbye. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': If you go up against this guy...be careful. 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Nick''': Because I'm with you. Don't you get it? I was listening to the police scanner. I heard about the Whammyburger! Fucking fantastic! It was a bunch of niggers, wasn't it? On TV, it's always nice looking white kids. But when you go in there, it's nothing but a bunch of fucking niggers. And they'll spit on your food if you're not nice to them. I know all about it. I'm with you. We're the same, you and me. We're the same. Don't you see?
:'''William Foster''': We are not the same. I'm an American. You're a sick asshole.
:'''Nick''': Just what kind of vigilante are you?
:'''William Foster''': I am not a vigilante. I am just trying to get home to my daughter's birthday party, and if everyone will just stay out of my way then nobody will get hurt.
:'''Nick''': Fuck you! Who the fuck are you? Are you fucking with me?
:'''William Foster''': I AM JUST DISAGREEING WITH YOU!!! In America, we have the freedom of speech, the right to disagree!
:'''Nick''': Fuck you and your freedom!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [phone rings and she answers it] Hello?
:'''William Foster''': [calling from the surplus store basement after just killing the Nazi] So who were you talking to a while ago? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You're just trying to scare me. 
:'''William Foster''': [now dressed in army fatigues] Am I succeeding? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': No, you're not succeeding. So you might as well just stop it. And you're not scaring me out of my own house. And you're not coming here. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, but I am. I'm on my way. You can count on that.  I've passed the point of no return, Beth. You know when that is? That's the point in a journey where it's longer to go back to the beginning than it is to continue to the end. It's like...Do you remember when [[w:Apollo 13|those astronauts got in trouble when they were going to the moon]] and something went wrong? I don't know, somebody screwed up and they had to get them back to Earth, but they had passed the point of no return. So, they had to go all the way around the moon to get back, and they were out of contact for hours. Everybody waited breathlessly to see if a bunch of dead guys in a can would pop out the other side, and that's me. I'm on the other side of the moon now, out of contact, and everybody's just going to have to wait until I pop out.
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': The police are here. 
:'''William Foster''': Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to [[w:Uxoricide|kill your wife if she insults you?]]
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [frightened] They're here right now! I'm looking at one right now! 
:'''William Foster''': Put them on the phone. [Elizabeth hangs up instead]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mrs. Foster''': [shows Prendergast and Torres her son's bedroom] This is his room. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You're a very neat and tidy lady. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Oh, he cleans his own room. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [jokingly] Now don't make me call you a liar. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': No. If he wasn't at work, i'd be afraid to set foot in here. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's he been doing lately? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Same as ever. [[w:Cold War|He's building important things to protect us from the communists]]. He works at NoTec. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': The defense plant? &quot;D-FENS&quot;. [to Torres] Why don't you call NoTec and see if you can get them on the line? [Torres leaves the room to call NoTec] So, what's going on with your son? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': What do you mean?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You know exactly what I mean? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': [becomes frightened] Sometimes he sits through an entire meal without saying a word. He just keeps shoveling food in his mouth like he's some kind of a machine, I get so nervous I can't swallow. I'll sit there with the same piece of food in my mouth. I just have to spit it out on the plate, and when I do, he looks at me like he would like to kill me. Don't tell him that I said that. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I promise, I won't. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': I try not to be a burden. I'm not just talking financial. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Now, how could you be a burden to anyone? Now if William, or Bill--
:'''Mrs. Foster''': He likes Bill. I call him Bill too. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': If Bill said he was going home, could he have meant where his wife and daughter live? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Ex-wife. We shouldn't be in here. [they leave Foster's old bedroom and head downstairs]
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Ex-wife, right? Elizabeth, what's her name again? Her maiden name? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Tavino. She was part Italian, you know it goes with them. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': So where's Elizabeth now? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': I wouldn't know. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You mean you don't know where your granddaughter lives? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': He doesn't want me to know where she is. He blames me for what happened. [Torres comes in, having just talked to NoTec on the phone]
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's the word? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': He was fired over a month ago. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': What? Well, where has he been going every day? Where has he been eating his lunch? 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''William Foster''': What kind of doctor lives here?
:'''The Caretaker''': Plastic surgeon.
:'''William Foster''': Plastic surgery bought this? Guess I'm in the wrong racket. Are there correspondence courses in plastic surgery? I lost my job. Actually, I didn't lose it, it lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled...Maybe it's the other way around, I forget. But, I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own daughter. [suddenly freaks out when he thinks he hurt the caretaker's daughter] Oh, jesus. I'm so sorry, honey! I didn't mean to hurt you! 
:'''The Caretaker''': No, no. It's your hand. You cut your hand. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, right. It's my hand. [sits down and bandages his hand]
:'''The Caretaker''': Please take me with you. 
:'''Caretaker's wife''': No! 
:'''The Caretaker''': They won't do anything as long as I'm with you. Just, please, let them go. 
:'''William Foster''': What do you think? You think I wanna hurt your family? I have a family of my own. You don't believe me? 
:'''Caretaker's wife''': We believe you. 
:'''William Foster''': That's where I'm going. I'm going home to see my family. It's my little girl's birthday today. We were going to have a barbecue like you guys, and she was going to play outside, my wife would hold my hand, and we'd talk about grown up things. And then when it got dark, we'd all [[w:Familicide|go to sleep together.]] We'd all sleep together in the dark. And everything will be just like it was before. [Foster starts crying] 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What were you going to do?
:'''William Foster''': I don't know, I don't know what I'm going to do.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Guys like you always say that. You don't know what you're gonna do until you do it. I think you knew exactly what you were going to do. You were gonna kill your wife and child!
:'''William Foster''': No
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah, and then it would be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to turn the gun on yourself! Now let's go meet some nice policemen. They're good guys. Come on, let's go.
:'''William Foster''': I'm the bad guy?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': How did that happen? I did everything they told me to. Did you know I build missiles?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': I helped to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. But instead they gave it to the plastic surgeons. They lied to me.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner's drying out in the oven? Hey! They lie to everybody, they lie to the fish. But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special, is your daughter. Now let's go. Let's go!
:'''William Foster''': [accepting that Prendergast is right] It sure was hot today, wasn't it? You know, I got a gun. In my pocket. [turns around to face Prendergast] I got lots of guns. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Stay there. Don't move. 
:'''William Foster''': Wanna draw? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Let's not. Let's call it a day. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, come on. It's perfect. A showdown between the sheriff and the bad guy? It's beautiful. On three. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': This doesn't have to be the end, Bill. You have a choice. My daughter is dead. I don't have a choice. You have a choice. 
:'''William Foster''': No, you have two choices. I can kill you, or you can kill me and my daughter can get the insurance. One. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Don't you want to see her grow up? 
:'''William Foster''': Behind bars? Two. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Don't do this. Please. LET'S GO! 
:'''William Foster''': Three (Foster pulls out a water pistol from his pocket, and Prendergast shoots Foster in the chest) I would've got you. (Foster falls off the railing and into the water below. Prendergast looks over the railing at Foster floating dead in the water, feeling bad that he just killed him)
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Reporter''': What cooperation was there between Pacific Division and Downtown? 
:'''Captain Yardley''': Not to denegrate the Venice police department, but it was one of our fellows that put this thing together. Prendergast. This is Sergeant Prendergast. [Prendergast shakes Yardley's hand in front of reporters] Damn fine work. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much. 
:'''Captain Yardley''': You're welcome. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [to Torres on a stretcher for her gunshot wound in the stomach] You still here? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': [jokingly] Afraid so. 
:'''EMT''': We've stabilized her, we're taking her in now. She'll be alright. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll see you at the hospital. [Torres gets taken in the ambulance. Prendergast approaches Elizabeth on the front porch to check if she and Adele are okay] How are you doing? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': I haven't told her yet. Oh shit. [notices a bunch of families with kids with birthday presents] It's her birthday. What should I do? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Tell her tomorrow. Let her have her little party. [Elizabeth leaves] What's your name, darling? 
:'''Adele Foster''': Adele. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [sits down on the front porch next to Adele] Adele? That's a nice name. If I had a little girl, i'd want her to be named Adele. 
:'''Adele Foster''': What's yours? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Mine? My name is &quot;Mud&quot;. 
:'''Adele Foster''': No, you're name's not &quot;Mud&quot;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Well, it will be when my wife finds out that...i'm still a cop. 
== About ''{{PAGENAME}}'' ==
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|I came up with that he worked at a defense plant, because reading about defense workers who had been laid off, because the United States was downsizing their defense programs, because the [[w:Soviet Union|USSR]] had recently [[w:Dissolution of the Soviet Union|gone kaput]], and that threat was no longer there, and the irony of that interested me, that here’s a guy who is protecting America, who was creating things that protected America, and he was essentially fired for doing too good of a job. ~ Ebbe Roe Smith]]
[[File:Bush Gorba P15623-25A.jpg|thumb|You kind of have to remember the setting and the time. It was the end of the Cold War. And all of the major defense industry plants were all based here in L.A. and when the wall came down and the Cold War ended. All these people in the defense industry were given their pink slips and weren't needed anymore. So, Falling Down told the story about an American whose life began to fall apart. ~ [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]]]
[[File:LA Riots - aftermath (159598182).jpg|thumb|I always thought this picture was closer to a pulse than we thought, in the sort of, tensions that existed at that time. While we were shooting the picture, the [[w:Rodney King|Rodney King]] [[w:1992 Los Angeles riots|riots]] happened. ~ [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]]]
[[File:Alfa Romeo Stelvio QV 1X7A7063.jpg|thumb|With the car culture, you're able to go from one segment of this society to another in a flash. Now, a lot of the times you're going to miss it because you're in a car. What happens to Foster is that he gets out of the car, and all of a sudden he's confronted with it because of the ground. He's moving through it. He's become part of it at that point. ~ Ebbe Roe Smith]]
* Falling Down first came to me through a news item that happened on the L.A. freeway system, where there was a big rude trucker who suddenly started to ram people and shove them off the road as he was driving. And I just became fascinated with, what was the mental process of this guy and what made him snap? And how did he end up getting there, crossing this line? I had a fantasy where this guy is in a huge truck and all of these people are getting in his way trying to cut him off and he’s not getting to where he wants to go. And suddenly, he decided, “I don’t have to take it. I’m in a huge truck.” so he snapped and started shoving these people off. The idea fascinated me that where do you cross the line when all of a sudden, the rules don’t apply. And that was the origin of it. When it came time to pick what William Foster was doing for a living, I came up with that he worked at a defense plant, because reading about defense workers who had been laid off, because the United States was downsizing their defense programs, because the [[w:Soviet Union|USSR]] had recently [[w:Dissolution of the Soviet Union|gone kaput]],  and that threat was no longer there, and the irony of that interested me, that here’s a guy who is protecting America, who was creating things that protected America, and he was essentially fired for doing too good of a job. Of course, now all of that is gone, the world has flipped around, we have a whole different set of rules and fears. William Foster was a guy who played by the rules all of the time and was punished for it, in his mind. - Ebbe Roe Smith. 
* When I created this character of William Foster, it sort of happened backwards, in that the point that the guy broke is where it started. As a script, and as an idea, and as a concept. So I had to work backwards to from there to create the character who drove up to this point and then snapped. Then once you had that, it was a process of just looking at the city and deciding what pissed me off about it, and putting this guy through these things and expressing them that way. The thing about the things which annoyed Foster in this movie are, they're normal things. Here's a guy who's not annoyed because his wife was killed by someone, he's speaking for every man as he goes through this day. And they're little normal things which annoy people which come up against him, and which also annoyed me. And that's what I sought out when I thought about the path that he takes. And I got out a map a lot, and checked it out and tried to work out this pathway that he took from downtown Los Angeles to Santa Monica where he would pop up here and there. And I tried to construct the script around those areas, which came up. [[Los Angeles]] is a melting pot. It's a place where cultures come up against each other. Money cultures, against poor cultures, class, race, they're all living right next to each other, and they have a tendency to rub up each other at various times. And with the car culture, you're able to go from one segment of this society to another in a flash. Now, a lot of the times you're going to miss it because you're in a car. What happens to Foster is that he gets out of the car, and all of a sudden he's confronted with it because of the ground. He's moving through it. He's become part of it at that point. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* For me, a really interesting part of the film was the mystery aspect. On one level, it was a straight out, mystery, a crime solving. And weaving the elements of Prendergast trying to solve this crime with what was happening, was one of the most fascinating things to me about it, and took it away from the pure societal commentary that was going on. The thing about the Prendergast character that i've always loved is he's a cop who can't stop being a policeman. He has a mystery, and he has to solve it. And it doesn't matter if it's his last day, it doesn't matter if everyone doesn't believe in him, he just can't give it up. In a very quiet focused way. You know, he does rebel against the forces that are coming at him in the police department, their attitude that he's a coward and his choice of not being on the street. But, I think it’s more than that, I think it’s a deeper thing in his character, is that he just can't stop. He can't stop a mystery because he is who he is, he's a policeman. So, i don't think that his motivation comes from a rebellion against the authority of the police department. It's a motivation that comes from deep within him, that is deeper than a rebellion against the forces coming at him. Although, I suppose there is a certain aspect of that to it. But more importantly, it's the simple character of the detective who can't stop searching out a crime. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* To me, one of the most compelling things about Falling Down when I read it, was that Ebbe Roe Smith had created these two characters: William Foster (Michael Douglas) and Martin Prendergast (Robert Duvall). And they're on this parallel course and do not meet til the last second of the movie. But to me, they were two sides of a coin, or more importantly two sides of our own psyche, in the sense that Foster is the part of us that fantasizes about walking out of our car in a traffic jam, about pulling out a gun if you don't get things you want, about righting some wrong on the street because we feel that we're justified. And Prendergast is the part of us that must find compassion, find forgiveness, mush through, shlog through this life trying to keep a sense of humor. There's a reason why these two men are in this story together, it's not just bad guy/good guy. It's an examination of our own spirit. The reason I decided to do Falling Down was because I thought it worked on so many levels. I thought, it was an psychological thriller on one level, almost like an old fashioned Western. You have a bad guy tearing up the town, and “will the old sheriff put on his guns and his badge and go find him.” I also thought it was a moral tale, a parable about these two men's lives during these eight hours. So it had that mythic fable feeling to it, which i love in movies. And then of course it had the political, social, economic layers all woven through it with a dark absurdist comedy, which I think life is really like. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* It's about a man who wakes up one morning, and the America that he has been sold. He doesn't know who he is anymore. Because he's suddenly in a city where it's a multicultural, multilingual world, and he doesn't fit in, in his mind, because he's an unbalanced person to begin with. Because, many people of all races, ages, socioeconomic backgrounds, many times in our lifetime we feel we're strangers in a strange land. But we don't wind up pulling guns. To me, William Foster always represented the man who does walk into McDonald's and shoots up people, but all the neighbors say he was so nice, he was so quiet. Cause it's never really [[w:Jeffrey Dahmer|Jeffrey Dahmer]], it's never the monster. It's really the guy next door. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* William Foster is clearly out of control before the movie starts. It's something i'm surprised the audience has not picked up on more. You've been hearing all this controversy about the social responsibility of this film. This man is nuts. He is out of his mind. Not anybody I know stops his car on a freeway in traffic and walks away from his car. The writer, Ebbe Roe Smith, purposely had that opening scene to establish a red light. This man has lost it. And so the movie is actually a spiral of decline from that moment, so he is gone when the movie starts, from other circumstances, some of which we find out, some we will never know. One of the things that people are enjoying about this movie is the enjoyment of watching a man not responsible for his actions because he's unable to be responsible for his actions. You pay a consequence for that as we find out in the movie. I think for the normal person having a sense of guilt is being aware, but guilt is a human feeling. Animals don't have guilt. Guilt is something that we have created as human beings, animals don't know anything about guilt. But it has to do with our brains, thinking if we are responsible. Again, Foster has no sense of anything except the present moment at this time. He has broken a couple of wires in his head and only deals with what is going on at that moment, so he doesn't have a sense of guilt, or really a sense of, as he says in the climax “I'm the bad guy?” He doesn't have a sense of responsibility. - [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]
* I feel that Falling Down is imitating the 6:00 news. And unfortunately, it's mild. Because it is one man's deterioration in an 8 hour period. And unfortunately when you turn on the news, you see many stories of violence, all violence is horrific and destructive to our society. And, in Falling Down, I tried to show that acting out one's violence, even though it may seem justified in certain situations, and even humorous, is not an option. It doesn't work. What I tried most importantly to do, was to put a face and a soul into that 6:00 news story. Where you see a seemingly ordinary hard working family man who snaps right in front of you. And he creates a terrible act of violence against his own family, against his co-workers, against random people in the street. And then you always see the neighbors standing around saying “I don't understand how this happened because he was such a nice guy.” And I think in those moments, unlike serial killers where we look at them and we realize that we're seeing somebody that's so insane, I think when the 6:00 news story is about one of those people, those seemingly ordinary people who snaps, that we all look to ourselves and say “That's one of us. That's someone just like you and me who couldn't take it any longer.” And that's what I feel Falling Down is really about. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* I've always thought, thematically, this film is about where the extra ordinary meets the ordinary. And it's a familiar theme in literature and in film. A lot of times it's where the ordinary man meets an extra ordinary circumstance and has to deal with it. In this case, it's flipped around. It's where an extra ordinary man is meeting up with an ordinary circumstance, which is the climate that he's walking through, the city. And what makes him extra ordinary is his fearlessness, he's crossed a line and no longer fears the consequences of his actions. And I've always thought that, in a way, this is a kind of superpower that a person could have. A person who is not afraid to die has a superpower, and they're really hard to stop. And that is something that we're experiencing today. And also that's what the theme was of William Foster. I didn't do a lot of research for the character, because he's myself written large. So, it was a matter of projecting myself into this position of a person who feels that they've done everything right, and yet they're getting shafted. And add to this tendency to violence, which is something which has been kept tamped down for most of his life, it's only come out dribs and drabs here and there. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* I feel that the characters in the film that William Foster encounters were not specifically chosen to in any way criticize or cartoon the people. In a movie like this, it could've gone on for 50 hours, and there could've been all kinds of incidents (gas station, bus stop, train). What the writer Ebbe Roe Smith chose were things that we felt were typical to an ordinary day in LA. And I think that they represent frustrations, ordinary frustrations. Not complex unusual extraordinary ones. But simple everyday ones that we all have to deal with in a healthy way. And Foster is incapable of dealing with them. I mean, in the Korean grocery store, he could've easily just paid for the soda and walked out, but he can't because his psyche is evaporating. I think Foster is in a sense a dinosaur. Because the fact that he can't deal with the rules, the multicultural society, the injustices and problems if everyday life, don't make him right and them wrong. Also, they're not going to change for him, just as they're not going to change for us. Perhaps in the voting booth, our vote counts. But in day to day situations our vote doesn't count. When they tell you that they stopped serving breakfast at 11:30, and you still want your breakfast, your vote doesn't count. Now, it would be nice to pull out a machine gun, and get your breakfast. But we don't do that. The reason we don't do that is because, as wish fulfilling as that moment is, like Foster, we would cross a line. And once you cross that line, there's no going back. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* I think, it may be hard for people to remember or maybe they were too young, but the temperature in Los Angeles at that time, you know, [[w:1992 Los Angeles riots|the riots]] broke out right in the middle of shooting. The tension, the racial tension in the streets and the economic tension, you know, [[w:George H.W. Bush|Bush Sr.]] was the president, we were in a recession, there was bad stuff really going down, bad stuff legally, a real &quot;Fuck you!&quot; to a lot of people in the United States, especially the ones who couldn't fight for themselves. And I think you can see the anger brewing and then when the [[w:Rodney King|Rodney King]] verdict went down, we were on all the streets of L.A. obviously making Falling Down, and when you make a movie on the streets of any city, you have local police that protect you and help you. And movie police are great. They've seen it all, they've done it all, and they're so helpful, you can't make a movie without them because you're really in the way of every city when you're making a movie there. They told us weeks before the verdict that if it went down, so that the cops got away with it, there was going to be blood in the streets. And all of the black church leaders were begging for some kind of compassion because they said there was going to be blood in the streets, and when that verdict came down, and you saw what happened, and you know, there was a city in flames. It was, you know, rioting, and looting, and insanity going on in the city. And we knew it was going to happen. In fact, the cops got us home the minute that verdict went home, we stopped shooting. We were supposed to be in Inglewood, which was right in the heart of where the riots were happening. It would have been very hard to get a movie company out of there. But then we went right back two days later, we went right back on those streets, and shot, and people were great to us. A lot of the people you see in all the scenes in the movie are the people in that neighborhood that we were shooting in at the time, because I didn't want the street scenes to seem inauthentic, so we used a lot of the local people. We were supposed to be in Inglewood shooting the Whammy Burger scene, but the cops told us not to go there cause they knew what was going to happen if the verdict came down, so we were on the Warner Bros back lot doing close ups of Michael, and then the riots broke out. And of course, you know, everyone on the crew had spouses at work, had children in school, so they got us out and they told everybody to go home immediately. And I raced home over in Mulholland and then saw it on TV because I live in Bel-Air so by the time I got to Bel-Air the city of LA was on fire. And yeah it was an amazing thing to watch, you could see the hate and the venom and the outrage of the unfairness of the people who were rioting, you could see the unfairness of their life on the planet and in this city and how it was all coming out in this moment. Do I think they were all right to do that? No. But do I understand where it came from? Sure. Absolutely. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* The LA Times did 7 pieces against Falling Down. They were so outraged by this movie. They actually had someone walk that route across Los Angeles, and nothing happened to them. I loved all that, that was great. That actually made the movie a success, the outrage. They had defense workers picketing saying they weren't like that. There were doors that were closed to me that certainly flew open after Falling Down, and still do. There were a lot of people that looked at me as a much more serious filmmaker. I had made a lot of movies up to that point with very young cast, a lot of them unknown. And even though i'm very proud of those movies, and those casts, and even though I think they're about something, a lot of times when you make movies with young people, they're not taking it seriously. You know, there are people that have a lot of respect for the film. And that means a lot to me. But, I didn't do it for those reasons. It also made a lot of trouble. It's amazing to be talking about it after so many years, that it still has weight. But I think all of that credit belongs to Ebbe Roe Smith. I had one of the greatest casts in the world, they did a brilliant job, all that credit belongs to them. Andrzej Bartkowiak did a great job shooting it. Barbara Ling did a great job bringing Los Angeles to life, she was our production designer. Marlene Stewart was our costume designer. And even thought in a contemporary film those jobs seem invisible, they're there and they did it. But it's Ebbe Roe Smith's writing. When he created this character, it hit a nerve in him, it hit a nerve in all of us who made it. And it obviously hit a nerve in the audience, even the people that were outraged by the movie, there's no bigger nerve hitting than outrage. Ebbe was a first time writer, and he's an actor. And I think that one of the reasons Falling Down hit a nerve with me when I read it, with everyone who read it. And all the wonderful cast that came to do it, but ultimately the public, and a lot of the press which was positive and negative, but I think the reason Falling Down still resonates is because of Ebbe Roe Smith's wonderful script. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* Falling Down, I think, if anything it's about, maybe, the point of views, and the problem that strife in society happens when you're unable to appreciate the point of view of another person. You're unable to put yourself in their shoes. You lock yourself off away from that. And people start wars over it. I think it’s a lot of that. Compromising is the secret to a society, and when people start to shut themselves off from it, then there's only one place that energy can go, and it's into a negative space, into a negative area. And it hardens opinion, and nothing is done. Nothing is pushed forward. The walls are built up, and there's no place for that energy to go but to a bad place. - Ebbe Roe Smith

== Cast ==
* [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]] - William Foster
* [[w:Robert Duvall|Robert Duvall]] - Sgt. Martin Prendergast
* [[w:Barbara Hershey|Barbara Hershey]] - Elizabeth Tavino
* [[w:Rachel Ticotin|Rachel Ticotin]] - Det. Sandra Torres
* [[w:Tuesday Weld|Tuesday Weld]] - Amanda Prendergast
* [[w:Frederic Forrest|Frederic Forrest]] - Nick, the army surplus store owner
* [[w:Lois Smith|Lois Smith]] - William Foster's mother
* Joey Hope Singer - Adele Foster-Tavino
* [[w:Michael Paul Chan|Michael Paul Chan]] - Mr. Lee, the convenience store owner
* [[w:Raymond J. Barry|Raymond J. Barry]] - Capt. William Yardley
* [[w:D. W. Moffett|D. W. Moffett]] - Det. Lydecker
* [[w:Steve Park (comedian)|Steve Park]] - Detective Brian
* [[w:Karina Arroyave|Karina Arroyave]] - Angie
* [[w:Brent Hinkley|Brent Hinkley]] - Rick
* [[w:Dedee Pfeiffer|Dedee Pfeiffer]] - Sheila Folsom

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0106856}}
* {{amg movie|16651}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|falling_down}}
* {{metacritic film|falling-down|Falling Down}}

[[Category:1993 films]]
[[Category:1990s American films]]
[[Category:Crime thriller films]]
[[Category:Films set in Los Angeles]]
[[Category:Vigilante films]]
[[Category:Action thriller films]]
[[Category:Films about consumerism]]</text>
      <sha1>bwpg3kddyr61mp7l70v6o8v4f9l1n5k</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965280</id>
      <parentid>3965140</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:58:35Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965280</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="54251" sha1="4lir85imqduiyvgrxpg4p7al7rtahu9" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Michael Douglas César 2016 3.jpg|thumb|I lost my job. Actually, I didn't lose it, it lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled...Maybe it's the other way around, I forget. But, I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own daughter.]]
'''''[[w:Falling Down|Falling Down]]''''' is a [[w:1993 in film|1993 drama film]] about laid-off defense worker who is enraged by a traffic jam and rampages across Los Angeles as a police sergeant searches for purpose on his retirement day.
:''Directed by [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]. Written by [[w:Ebbe Roe Smith|Ebbe Roe Smith]].''
{{center/s}}'''A Tale Of Urban Reality.'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]{{center/e}}

==William Foster==
* ''[While destroying merchandise in a Korean owned grocery store]'' You think I'm a thief? No. See, I'm not the thief, I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a STINKING SODA! YOU'RE THE THIEF! I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer! I'm rolling prices back to 1965! What do you think of that? 

* Okay. Okay. I was willing to mind my own business. I was willing to respect your territory and treat you like a man, but you couldn't leave it alone, could you? You couldn't let a man sit here for 5 minutes and take a rest on your precious piece of shit hill?! 

* Why have you put barbed wire on a fence? Is this how you rich people amuse yourselves? You put barbed wire on the fence so innocent people like me can hurt our hands looking in, huh?

* I lost my job. Actually I didn't lose it. It lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled. Maybe it's the other way around. I forget, but I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own kid.

* I am not a vigilante. I'm just trying to get home to my daughter's birthday. If everyone will stay out of my way, then nobody will get hurt. 

* What the hell are you trying to do? Kill me with the golf ball? IS THAT ENOUGH, YOU GOT ALL THESE BEAUTIFUL ACRES FENCING FOR YOUR LITTLE GAME, BUT YOU OUGHT TO KILL ME WITH THE GOLF BALL!? You should have children playing here! You should have FAMILIES HAVING PICNICS! YOU SHOULD HAVE A GODDAMN PETTING ZOO!! Instead you got these stupid carts for you old men with nothing better to do!!!

* I've passed the point of no return, Beth. You know when that is? That's the point in a journey where it's longer to go back to the beginning than it is to continue to the end. It's like...Do you remember when [[w:Apollo 13|those astronauts got in trouble when they were going to the moon]] and something went wrong? I don't know, somebody screwed up and they had to get them back to Earth, but they had passed the point of no return. So, they had to go all the way around the moon to get back, and they were out of contact for hours. Everybody waited breathlessly to see if a bunch of dead guys in a can would pop out the other side, and that's me. I'm on the other side of the moon now, out of contact, and everybody's just going to have to wait until I pop out.

* Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to [[w:Uxoricide|kill your wife if she insults you?]]

* I wanna know what's wrong with the street. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, I think you're just trying to justify your inflated budgets! 

*It's my little girl's birthday today. We were going to have a barbecue like you guys, and she was going to play outside, my wife would hold my hand, and we'd talk about grown up things. And then when it got dark, we'd all [[w:Familicide|go to sleep together.]] We'd all sleep together in the dark. And everything will be just like it was before.

== Martin Prendergast ==
[[File:Robert Duvall 2 by David Shankbone.jpg|thumb|Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner's drying out in the oven? Hey! They lie to everybody, they lie to the fish. But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special, is your daughter.]]
* Martin Prendergast. Downtown robbery. Let's go. 
* Genuine Santa Monica sand's more like it. 
* You mean he stole your baseball bat but he paid for the soda? Oh, this guy's discriminating. 
* What would a guy in a white shirt and tie be doing in gangland?
* Sandra, you have a career. It's not easy to see your beauty go and that's all you got. 
* Now, if you go up against this guy, be careful. 
* Me? I'm a coward, the captain just told me. 
* Hey! What happens between me and my wife is nobody's business but mine, Sandra. 
* And she didn't make me get off the street. I happened to come home late one night, and I found her sitting in the dark staring at the wall. She had gotten into her head that I'd been killed. She thought I was a ghost and I had to chase her all over the house! 
* Some G.I. Joe gave an old geaser a heart attack at the Altmore Golf Course, and accosted a family right next door. He's wearing a surplus jacket, the kind you find at an Army Navy store. 
* Would you believe that I used to fish right out here. This very spot. Now they say &quot;Don't eat the fish, it's poisonous.&quot; And you can't even swim in the water, it'll give you some kind of bacterial infection. So, how's that for &quot;sick&quot;? 
* Everyone has their own idea of what they think paradise is. 
* You know, my wife was never was cut out for motherhood. She did it all for me. Went through all that pain, lost her figure, for me. Then the kid went to sleep one night and never woke up. They called it &quot;Infant death syndrome&quot;, but she wasn't an infant. It was very strange, cause she was 2 years old, she was a big girl. She was our baby. 
* Guys like you always say that. You don't know what you're gonna do until you do it. I think you knew exactly what you were going to do. You were gonna kill your wife and child! And then it would be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to turn the gun on yourself!
* Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner is drying out in the oven? Hey, they lie to everybody. They lie to the fish! But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special is your daughter.
* Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much.  

== Dialogue ==
[[File:US one dollar bill, obverse, series 2009.jpg|thumb|You think I'm a thief? No. See, I'm not the thief, I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a STINKING SODA! YOU'RE THE THIEF! I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer! I'm rolling prices back to 1965! What do you think of that?]]
[[File:Cheesburger 400 Lunch Combo, Flame 400 Burger Cafe Raine Square, 2026 (01).jpg|thumb|Rick, have you ever heard the expression &quot;The customer is always right&quot;?]]
[[File:Pohjoismaisen vastarintaliikkeen mielenosoitus 2018.jpg|thumb|We are not the same. I'm an American, you're a sick asshole.]]
[[File:Flag of the United States (DDD-F-416E specifications).svg|thumb|In America, we have the freedom of speech! The right to disagree!]]
[[File:(2) Cycle of abuse, power &amp; control issues in domestic abuse situations.gif|thumb|Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to kill your wife if she insults you?]]
[[File:NATO vs. Warsaw Pact (1949-1990).svg|thumb|Did you know I build missiles? I helped to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. But instead, they gave it to those plastic surgeons. They lied to me.]]
[[File:Los Angeles with Mount Baldy.jpg|thumb|It sure was hot today, wasn't it?]]
:'''Guy on freeway''': Hey! Where do you think you're going?! 
:'''William Foster''': I'm going home! 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [phone rings and Prendergast answers it] Prendergast here. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Hi. It's me. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Hi. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [holding a photo of her deceased daughter in her hand] I wish you'd come home. Wouldn't you come home now. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's wrong, baby? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': I don't know. I just...i got a little scared. And...i'd really like you to come home. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What is it, honey? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''':  Well...[starts crying] I don't know. I was just wrapping some...some glasses up and some things and I...I got...I got really scared. You're not doing this move just for me, are you? You really want to do it, don't you? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Look. The Important thing is we're together and that's what counts. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] Yeah, but you're not here.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': But I will be soon, baby. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] Say it. Say it. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll be home soon. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] No. Say it. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll be home soon and I love you. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': I love you, too. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Feel better? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [continues crying] No, I don't feel better. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [gets out a snowglobe music box playing 'London Bridge is Falling Down'] No? Okay. &quot;London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down, London bridge is falling down&quot; Come on, help me. &quot;My Fair Lady&quot;
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [sings with Prendergast] My Fair Lady. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [laughs] You're my fair lady? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': [giggles] Yes. Bye. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Bye-bye [hangs up the phone]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [phone rings and she answers it] Hello? [no answer] Hello? [still no answer] Cut the crap, I know it's you. What do you want? It is you, isn't it? 
:'''William Foster''': [on a payphone] Yeah. Yeah, it's me. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You got to stop calling me. 
:'''William Foster''': It's Adele's birthday. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yes, I know it's her birthday. What do you want? 
:'''William Foster''': I'm coming home. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': What are you talking about? 
:'''William Foster''': I just...I want to let you know that I'm coming home for her birthday. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You're not coming here. 
:'''William Foster''': Listen Beth. I got to see you. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': No. No you listen to me. This is my house now. I pay the rent. You don't even pay child support. You just can't walk in and out whenever you feel like. 
:'''William Foster''': Don't talk like that, Beth. I have to come home. I have to bring her present. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You know you can't come here. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 1''': Hey. Hey! [points that Foster is at the phonebooth] It's him! It's him, man! 
:'''William Foster''': How's Adele? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': This isn't your home anymore. 
:'''William Foster''': How is she? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': She's doing just fine without you. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Get out of the car! 
:'''Angie''': Come on, man. It's fucking broad daylight, man! This shit ain't worth it! 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Get the fuck out of the car now! [the gang start loading their weapons as Angie steps out of the car]
:'''William Foster''': And you? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Don't. I'll call the police if I have to. 
:'''Mexican gangbanger 2''': Go, go, go! 
:'''William Foster''': I'm coming home, Beth. I'm coming home. [he hangs up, and the Mexican gang try to shoot Foster, but hits several bystanders instead, missing him]. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You sure you don't want something? Coffee, soda, something? 
:'''Officer Springer''': No thank you, ma'am. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': I feel kind of stupid about this whole thing. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Better safe than sorry. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yeah that's what I thought. 
:'''Officer Springer''': You have a restraining order against your husband?
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Ex-husband. Yeah, he'd show up on the wrong day, or in the middle of the night pounding on the door, stuff like that. Thing is. He has this horrendous temper and I just didn't know if a restraining order was a good idea and if it'd do more harm than good. But the judge said we should make an example of him. So he can't come within 100 feet of us. Or is it yards? Which is it? Feet or yards? 
:'''Officer Springer''': That's up to the judge. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Really? I thought it was a set thing. 
:'''Officer Springer''': No, it's at his discretion. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': That's interesting. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Does he drink? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [pause] Oh, I thought you meant the judge. No, I wouldn't say so. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Do drugs? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Oh, no. 
:'''Officer Springer''': But he has a propensity for violence? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Yeah, I think you can say that. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Did he strike the little girl? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Well, no. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Did he strike you? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Not exactly. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Not exactly? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You know, there were times when I thought he was going to. But i just didn't want until he got around to it. It's hard to explain. He could, I think. 
:'''Officer Springer''': You think? 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Vagrant''': Hello sir. How are you today. 
:'''William Foster''': I'm doing alright. How about you? 
:'''Vagrant''': Me? I'm terrible. 
:'''William Foster''': Sorry to hear that. 
:'''Vagrant''': Yeah. I came down from Santa Barbara yesterday and this friend of mine wasn't home like I thought he was going to be and he owes me some money. So, i thought I had some money to get back home with. I'm almost out of gas. I had to sleep in my car last night. I don't suppose you have a couple of bucks you could give me. It would really help me out. If you give me your address I'll mail it back, honest. 
:'''William Foster''': Let me see your driver's license. 
:'''Vagrant''': What do you want to see my driver's license for? 
:'''William Foster''': Well, if your from Santa Barbara it would have your address on it. I want it. 
:'''Vagrant''': I don't have a driver's license. 
:'''William Foster''': You mean you drove all the way from Santa Barbara without a license? 
:'''Vagrant''': Are you a cop? 
:'''William Foster''': Let me see your car registration. A matter of fact, let me see your car. 
:'''Vagrant''': Alright, forget it. Okay, just forget it. That's a hell of a way to treat a &quot;vet&quot;, man! 
:'''William Foster''': You're an animal doctor? 
:'''Vagrant''': No. I vet. A veteran. I was in [[w:Vietnam War|Nam]]. 
:'''William Foster''': What were you, a drummer boy? You must've been 10 years old. 
:'''Vagrant''': I mean the [[w:Gulf War|Gulf]], I meant to say the Gulf. Jesus! Come on! All I'm asking for is a little change I haven't eaten in 3 days. [realizing he's eating a sandwich in his hand] I mean...except for this. Fuck it! Give me some money, man! Just give me some money! 
:'''William Foster''': No. 
:'''Vagrant''': How much change is in your pocket? I don't care if it's a dime. Give it to me. 
:'''William Foster''': I'm not giving you any money. 
:'''Vagrant''': You got a cigarette? 
:'''William Foster''': I don't smoke. 
:'''Vagrant''': Oh, you got to give me something. 
:'''William Foster''': Why don't you try to get a job? 
:'''Vagrant''': Hey! This is my park, I live here! Who the fuck are you walking through my park carrying two bags?! You got two bags, I don't got any. Is that fair?! What's in those bags? [Foster grips his bag of guns tightly, seemingly intending to kill him] Give me one of those bags. I could sell those bags and eat for a week with the money. You got two of them, why do you need two of them? 
:'''William Foster''': You're right. Here. [gives his briefcase to the vagrant]
:'''Vagrant''': Are you serious?
:'''William Foster''': I don't need it anymore. 
:'''Vagrant''': Alright! [opens up the briefcase. Only to discover it only contains a sandwich, two carrotsticks and an apple. The vagrant throws the apple out of disappointment as Foster walks away] Son of a bitch! 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''William Foster''': Hi. I'd like some breakfast.
:'''Rick''': We stopped serving breakfast.
:'''William Foster''': I know you stopped serving breakfast Rick, Sheila told me that you... why am I calling you by your first names? I don't even know you. I still call my boss 'Mister' even though I've been working with him for seven years, but all of a sudden I walk in here and I'm calling you Rick and Sheila like we're in some kind of AA meeting and... I don't want to be your buddy, Rick. I just want a little breakfast?
:'''Sheila''': You can call me Miss Folsom if you want.
:'''Rick''': ''Sheila''. We stopped serving breakfast at 11:30.
:''[Foster looks at his watch to find it's 3 minutes past the deadline. He places his gym bag full of guns on the counter.]''
:'''William Foster''': Rick, have you ever heard the expression &quot;the customer is always right&quot;?
:'''Rick''': ''[sighs]'' Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': Well, here I am. The customer.
:'''Rick''': ''[still smiling]'' That's not our policy. You'll have to order something from the lunch menu.
:'''William Foster''': I don't want ''lunch''. I want ''breakfast''.
:'''Rick''': Yeah, well hey, I'm really sorry.
:'''William Foster''': Yeah, well hey, I'm real sorry too. ''[pulls out a TEC-9]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt; 
:'''Officer Springer''': Ma'am, we're gonna take off now. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You are? Really? 
:'''Officer Springer''': It doesn't look like your husband's gonna show. What would probably happen was he came to his senses that he realize he could get into a lot of trouble if he harassed you. What I think you should do is call your lawyer and tell him about it. 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': Well, it's one of those services. I didn't have much money. 
:'''Officer Springer''': Well, call them. And tell them to call your husband's lawyer. Make it official. In the meantime, lock up. And if anything else happens, give us a call. 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [phone rings and Prendergast answers it] Yeah, Prendergast. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Hi, it's me. He's eating and resting comfortably now. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Who is? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Mr. Peepers. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Good. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Honey, I'm sorry about before. I really blew my top. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': That's okay, honey [Torres starts calling] Can you hold on just one second? [switches to Torres] Prendergast. 
:'''Sandra Torres''': [at the Whammyburger] White shirt and tie. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Sandra, could you hold on one second? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': I gotta go. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': No, just one second. It's very important. [switches to Amanda] 
:'''Lydecker''': Detective Torres! Excuse me! We have about 7 million people out here waiting to make a statement! 
:'''Sandra Torres''': I'm on the phone! 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [to Amanda] Hon, let me call your right back. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': What's wrong? What are you doing? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Nothing's wrong. Not doing anything. What do you mean? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Well, you can come home then. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I can't. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': It's your last day. What are they gonna do, fire you? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': There's a lot of red tape, the sooner I get done the sooner i'll get home. I'll call you in a while, okay. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Wait a minute. Make a list. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': A list? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': We need boneless chicken, skinless. Red peppers. Not green, red. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Honey. Hold on one second. [switches to Torres] Sandra
:'''Sandra Torres''': I am tying up the phone here. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Just listen for once in your life. Now a gang girl at the drive by said that a man in a white shirt and tie attacked her homeboys with a baseball bat. Now I think somebody's let their dog off the leash. 
:'''Sandra Torres''': I think you got &quot;last day-itis&quot;. This man was not swinging a baseball bat, he has a gym bag full of guns.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': A gym bag? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': Look, you asked me to tell you what he was wearing. I gotta run. The lieutenants wants the canvass the neighborhood. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Sandra, just one more second. Please it's important. [switches to Amanda] Hon, why don't you go to the store? 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Why? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': It's my last day, the guys might want to have a send off or something. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': What are they gonna do? Get some broad with tassels dangling from her tits, dancing on her desk? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Of course not. 
:'''Amanda Prendergast''': Look, buster. While you've been there playing cop, i'm at home planning your retirement. It's over. The sooner you get that through your head the better. You are no longer in the law enforcement business. Now, I will at the usual time, capito? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [switches to Torres] Sandra, are you mad at me? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': No, I hate you but I'm not mad. 
:'''Lydecker''': [rudely to Torres] Are you retiring as well, too?
:'''Sandra Torres''': Just don't leave without saying goodbye. 
:'''Lydecker''': [rudely to Torres] Goodbye. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': If you go up against this guy...be careful. 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Nick''': Because I'm with you. Don't you get it? I was listening to the police scanner. I heard about the Whammyburger! Fucking fantastic! It was a bunch of niggers, wasn't it? On TV, it's always nice looking white kids. But when you go in there, it's nothing but a bunch of fucking niggers. And they'll spit on your food if you're not nice to them. I know all about it. I'm with you. We're the same, you and me. We're the same. Don't you see?
:'''William Foster''': We are not the same. I'm an American. You're a sick asshole.
:'''Nick''': Just what kind of vigilante are you?
:'''William Foster''': I am not a vigilante. I am just trying to get home to my daughter's birthday party, and if everyone will just stay out of my way then nobody will get hurt.
:'''Nick''': Fuck you! Who the fuck are you? Are you fucking with me?
:'''William Foster''': I AM JUST DISAGREEING WITH YOU!!! In America, we have the freedom of speech, the right to disagree!
:'''Nick''': Fuck you and your freedom!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [phone rings and she answers it] Hello?
:'''William Foster''': [calling from the surplus store basement after just killing the Nazi] So who were you talking to a while ago? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': You're just trying to scare me. 
:'''William Foster''': [now dressed in army fatigues] Am I succeeding? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': No, you're not succeeding. So you might as well just stop it. And you're not scaring me out of my own house. And you're not coming here. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, but I am. I'm on my way. You can count on that.  I've passed the point of no return, Beth. You know when that is? That's the point in a journey where it's longer to go back to the beginning than it is to continue to the end. It's like...Do you remember when [[w:Apollo 13|those astronauts got in trouble when they were going to the moon]] and something went wrong? I don't know, somebody screwed up and they had to get them back to Earth, but they had passed the point of no return. So, they had to go all the way around the moon to get back, and they were out of contact for hours. Everybody waited breathlessly to see if a bunch of dead guys in a can would pop out the other side, and that's me. I'm on the other side of the moon now, out of contact, and everybody's just going to have to wait until I pop out.
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': The police are here. 
:'''William Foster''': Did you know that in certain South American countries it's still legal to [[w:Uxoricide|kill your wife if she insults you?]]
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': [frightened] They're here right now! I'm looking at one right now! 
:'''William Foster''': Put them on the phone. [Elizabeth hangs up instead]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mrs. Foster''': [shows Prendergast and Torres her son's bedroom] This is his room. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You're a very neat and tidy lady. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Oh, he cleans his own room. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [jokingly] Now don't make me call you a liar. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': No. If he wasn't at work, i'd be afraid to set foot in here. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's he been doing lately? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Same as ever. [[w:Cold War|He's building important things to protect us from the communists]]. He works at NoTec. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': The defense plant? &quot;D-FENS&quot;. [to Torres] Why don't you call NoTec and see if you can get them on the line? [Torres leaves the room to call NoTec] So, what's going on with your son? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': What do you mean?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You know exactly what I mean? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': [becomes frightened] Sometimes he sits through an entire meal without saying a word. He just keeps shoveling food in his mouth like he's some kind of a machine, I get so nervous I can't swallow. I'll sit there with the same piece of food in my mouth. I just have to spit it out on the plate, and when I do, he looks at me like he would like to kill me. Don't tell him that I said that. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I promise, I won't. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': I try not to be a burden. I'm not just talking financial. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Now, how could you be a burden to anyone? Now if William, or Bill--
:'''Mrs. Foster''': He likes Bill. I call him Bill too. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': If Bill said he was going home, could he have meant where his wife and daughter live? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Ex-wife. We shouldn't be in here. [they leave Foster's old bedroom and head downstairs]
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Ex-wife, right? Elizabeth, what's her name again? Her maiden name? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': Tavino. She was part Italian, you know it goes with them. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': So where's Elizabeth now? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': I wouldn't know. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': You mean you don't know where your granddaughter lives? 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': He doesn't want me to know where she is. He blames me for what happened. [Torres comes in, having just talked to NoTec on the phone]
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What's the word? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': He was fired over a month ago. 
:'''Mrs. Foster''': What? Well, where has he been going every day? Where has he been eating his lunch? 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''William Foster''': What kind of doctor lives here?
:'''The Caretaker''': Plastic surgeon.
:'''William Foster''': Plastic surgery bought this? Guess I'm in the wrong racket. Are there correspondence courses in plastic surgery? I lost my job. Actually, I didn't lose it, it lost me. I'm overeducated, underskilled...Maybe it's the other way around, I forget. But, I'm obsolete. I'm not economically viable. I can't even support my own daughter. [suddenly freaks out when he thinks he hurt the caretaker's daughter] Oh, jesus. I'm so sorry, honey! I didn't mean to hurt you! 
:'''The Caretaker''': No, no. It's your hand. You cut your hand. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, right. It's my hand. [sits down and bandages his hand]
:'''The Caretaker''': Please take me with you. 
:'''Caretaker's wife''': No! 
:'''The Caretaker''': They won't do anything as long as I'm with you. Just, please, let them go. 
:'''William Foster''': What do you think? You think I wanna hurt your family? I have a family of my own. You don't believe me? 
:'''Caretaker's wife''': We believe you. 
:'''William Foster''': That's where I'm going. I'm going home to see my family. It's my little girl's birthday today. We were going to have a barbecue like you guys, and she was going to play outside, my wife would hold my hand, and we'd talk about grown up things. And then when it got dark, we'd all [[w:Familicide|go to sleep together.]] We'd all sleep together in the dark. And everything will be just like it was before. [Foster starts crying] 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': What were you going to do?
:'''William Foster''': I don't know, I don't know what I'm going to do.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Guys like you always say that. You don't know what you're gonna do until you do it. I think you knew exactly what you were going to do. You were gonna kill your wife and child!
:'''William Foster''': No
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah, and then it would be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to turn the gun on yourself! Now let's go meet some nice policemen. They're good guys. Come on, let's go.
:'''William Foster''': I'm the bad guy?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': How did that happen? I did everything they told me to. Did you know I build missiles?
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Yeah.
:'''William Foster''': I helped to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. But instead they gave it to the plastic surgeons. They lied to me.
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Is that what all this is about? You're angry because you were lied to? Is that why my chicken dinner's drying out in the oven? Hey! They lie to everybody, they lie to the fish. But that doesn't give you any special right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special, is your daughter. Now let's go. Let's go!
:'''William Foster''': [accepting that Prendergast is right] It sure was hot today, wasn't it? You know, I got a gun. In my pocket. [turns around to face Prendergast] I got lots of guns. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Stay there. Don't move. 
:'''William Foster''': Wanna draw? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Let's not. Let's call it a day. 
:'''William Foster''': Oh, come on. It's perfect. A showdown between the sheriff and the bad guy? It's beautiful. On three. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': This doesn't have to be the end, Bill. You have a choice. My daughter is dead. I don't have a choice. You have a choice. 
:'''William Foster''': No, you have two choices. I can kill you, or you can kill me and my daughter can get the insurance. One. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Don't you want to see her grow up? 
:'''William Foster''': Behind bars? Two. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Don't do this. Please. LET'S GO! 
:'''William Foster''': Three (Foster pulls out a water pistol from his pocket, and Prendergast shoots Foster in the chest) I would've got you. (Foster falls off the railing and into the water below. Prendergast looks over the railing at Foster floating dead in the water, feeling bad that he just killed him)
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Reporter''': What cooperation was there between Pacific Division and Downtown? 
:'''Captain Yardley''': Not to denegrate the Venice police department, but it was one of our fellows that put this thing together. Prendergast. This is Sergeant Prendergast. [Prendergast shakes Yardley's hand in front of reporters] Damn fine work. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much. 
:'''Captain Yardley''': You're welcome. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [to Torres on a stretcher for her gunshot wound in the stomach] You still here? 
:'''Sandra Torres''': [jokingly] Afraid so. 
:'''EMT''': We've stabilized her, we're taking her in now. She'll be alright. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': I'll see you at the hospital. [Torres gets taken in the ambulance. Prendergast approaches Elizabeth on the front porch to check if she and Adele are okay] How are you doing? 
:'''Elizabeth Tavino''': I haven't told her yet. Oh shit. [notices a bunch of families with kids with birthday presents] It's her birthday. What should I do? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Tell her tomorrow. Let her have her little party. [Elizabeth leaves] What's your name, darling? 
:'''Adele Foster''': Adele. 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': [sits down on the front porch next to Adele] Adele? That's a nice name. If I had a little girl, i'd want her to be named Adele. 
:'''Adele Foster''': What's yours? 
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Mine? My name is &quot;Mud&quot;. 
:'''Adele Foster''': No, you're name's not &quot;Mud&quot;
:'''Martin Prendergast''': Well, it will be when my wife finds out that...i'm still a cop. 
== About ''{{PAGENAME}}'' ==
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|I came up with that he worked at a defense plant, because reading about defense workers who had been laid off, because the United States was downsizing their defense programs, because the [[w:Soviet Union|USSR]] had recently [[w:Dissolution of the Soviet Union|gone kaput]], and that threat was no longer there, and the irony of that interested me, that here’s a guy who is protecting America, who was creating things that protected America, and he was essentially fired for doing too good of a job. ~ Ebbe Roe Smith]]
[[File:Bush Gorba P15623-25A.jpg|thumb|You kind of have to remember the setting and the time. It was the end of the Cold War. And all of the major defense industry plants were all based here in L.A. and when the wall came down and the Cold War ended. All these people in the defense industry were given their pink slips and weren't needed anymore. So, Falling Down told the story about an American whose life began to fall apart. ~ [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]]]
[[File:LA Riots - aftermath (159598182).jpg|thumb|I always thought this picture was closer to a pulse than we thought, in the sort of, tensions that existed at that time. While we were shooting the picture, the [[w:Rodney King|Rodney King]] [[w:1992 Los Angeles riots|riots]] happened. ~ [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]]]
[[File:Alfa Romeo Stelvio QV 1X7A7063.jpg|thumb|With the car culture, you're able to go from one segment of this society to another in a flash. Now, a lot of the times you're going to miss it because you're in a car. What happens to Foster is that he gets out of the car, and all of a sudden he's confronted with it because of the ground. He's moving through it. He's become part of it at that point. ~ Ebbe Roe Smith]]
* Falling Down first came to me through a news item that happened on the L.A. freeway system, where there was a big rude trucker who suddenly started to ram people and shove them off the road as he was driving. And I just became fascinated with, what was the mental process of this guy and what made him snap? And how did he end up getting there, crossing this line? I had a fantasy where this guy is in a huge truck and all of these people are getting in his way trying to cut him off and he’s not getting to where he wants to go. And suddenly, he decided, “I don’t have to take it. I’m in a huge truck.” so he snapped and started shoving these people off. The idea fascinated me that where do you cross the line when all of a sudden, the rules don’t apply. And that was the origin of it. When it came time to pick what William Foster was doing for a living, I came up with that he worked at a defense plant, because reading about defense workers who had been laid off, because the United States was downsizing their defense programs, because the [[w:Soviet Union|USSR]] had recently [[w:Dissolution of the Soviet Union|gone kaput]],  and that threat was no longer there, and the irony of that interested me, that here’s a guy who is protecting America, who was creating things that protected America, and he was essentially fired for doing too good of a job. Of course, now all of that is gone, the world has flipped around, we have a whole different set of rules and fears. William Foster was a guy who played by the rules all of the time and was punished for it, in his mind. - Ebbe Roe Smith. 
* When I created this character of William Foster, it sort of happened backwards, in that the point that the guy broke is where it started. As a script, and as an idea, and as a concept. So I had to work backwards to from there to create the character who drove up to this point and then snapped. Then once you had that, it was a process of just looking at the city and deciding what pissed me off about it, and putting this guy through these things and expressing them that way. The thing about the things which annoyed Foster in this movie are, they're normal things. Here's a guy who's not annoyed because his wife was killed by someone, he's speaking for every man as he goes through this day. And they're little normal things which annoy people which come up against him, and which also annoyed me. And that's what I sought out when I thought about the path that he takes. And I got out a map a lot, and checked it out and tried to work out this pathway that he took from downtown Los Angeles to Santa Monica where he would pop up here and there. And I tried to construct the script around those areas, which came up. [[Los Angeles]] is a melting pot. It's a place where cultures come up against each other. Money cultures, against poor cultures, class, race, they're all living right next to each other, and they have a tendency to rub up each other at various times. And with the car culture, you're able to go from one segment of this society to another in a flash. Now, a lot of the times you're going to miss it because you're in a car. What happens to Foster is that he gets out of the car, and all of a sudden he's confronted with it because of the ground. He's moving through it. He's become part of it at that point. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* For me, a really interesting part of the film was the mystery aspect. On one level, it was a straight out, mystery, a crime solving. And weaving the elements of Prendergast trying to solve this crime with what was happening, was one of the most fascinating things to me about it, and took it away from the pure societal commentary that was going on. The thing about the Prendergast character that i've always loved is he's a cop who can't stop being a policeman. He has a mystery, and he has to solve it. And it doesn't matter if it's his last day, it doesn't matter if everyone doesn't believe in him, he just can't give it up. In a very quiet focused way. You know, he does rebel against the forces that are coming at him in the police department, their attitude that he's a coward and his choice of not being on the street. But, I think it’s more than that, I think it’s a deeper thing in his character, is that he just can't stop. He can't stop a mystery because he is who he is, he's a policeman. So, i don't think that his motivation comes from a rebellion against the authority of the police department. It's a motivation that comes from deep within him, that is deeper than a rebellion against the forces coming at him. Although, I suppose there is a certain aspect of that to it. But more importantly, it's the simple character of the detective who can't stop searching out a crime. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* To me, one of the most compelling things about Falling Down when I read it, was that Ebbe Roe Smith had created these two characters: William Foster (Michael Douglas) and Martin Prendergast (Robert Duvall). And they're on this parallel course and do not meet til the last second of the movie. But to me, they were two sides of a coin, or more importantly two sides of our own psyche, in the sense that Foster is the part of us that fantasizes about walking out of our car in a traffic jam, about pulling out a gun if you don't get things you want, about righting some wrong on the street because we feel that we're justified. And Prendergast is the part of us that must find compassion, find forgiveness, mush through, shlog through this life trying to keep a sense of humor. There's a reason why these two men are in this story together, it's not just bad guy/good guy. It's an examination of our own spirit. The reason I decided to do Falling Down was because I thought it worked on so many levels. I thought, it was an psychological thriller on one level, almost like an old fashioned Western. You have a bad guy tearing up the town, and “will the old sheriff put on his guns and his badge and go find him.” I also thought it was a moral tale, a parable about these two men's lives during these eight hours. So it had that mythic fable feeling to it, which i love in movies. And then of course it had the political, social, economic layers all woven through it with a dark absurdist comedy, which I think life is really like. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* It's about a man who wakes up one morning, and the America that he has been sold. He doesn't know who he is anymore. Because he's suddenly in a city where it's a multicultural, multilingual world, and he doesn't fit in, in his mind, because he's an unbalanced person to begin with. Because, many people of all races, ages, socioeconomic backgrounds, many times in our lifetime we feel we're strangers in a strange land. But we don't wind up pulling guns. To me, William Foster always represented the man who does walk into McDonald's and shoots up people, but all the neighbors say he was so nice, he was so quiet. Cause it's never really [[w:Jeffrey Dahmer|Jeffrey Dahmer]], it's never the monster. It's really the guy next door. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* William Foster is clearly out of control before the movie starts. It's something i'm surprised the audience has not picked up on more. You've been hearing all this controversy about the social responsibility of this film. This man is nuts. He is out of his mind. Not anybody I know stops his car on a freeway in traffic and walks away from his car. The writer, Ebbe Roe Smith, purposely had that opening scene to establish a red light. This man has lost it. And so the movie is actually a spiral of decline from that moment, so he is gone when the movie starts, from other circumstances, some of which we find out, some we will never know. One of the things that people are enjoying about this movie is the enjoyment of watching a man not responsible for his actions because he's unable to be responsible for his actions. You pay a consequence for that as we find out in the movie. I think for the normal person having a sense of guilt is being aware, but guilt is a human feeling. Animals don't have guilt. Guilt is something that we have created as human beings, animals don't know anything about guilt. But it has to do with our brains, thinking if we are responsible. Again, Foster has no sense of anything except the present moment at this time. He has broken a couple of wires in his head and only deals with what is going on at that moment, so he doesn't have a sense of guilt, or really a sense of, as he says in the climax “I'm the bad guy?” He doesn't have a sense of responsibility. - [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]]
* I feel that Falling Down is imitating the 6:00 news. And unfortunately, it's mild. Because it is one man's deterioration in an 8 hour period. And unfortunately when you turn on the news, you see many stories of violence, all violence is horrific and destructive to our society. And, in Falling Down, I tried to show that acting out one's violence, even though it may seem justified in certain situations, and even humorous, is not an option. It doesn't work. What I tried most importantly to do, was to put a face and a soul into that 6:00 news story. Where you see a seemingly ordinary hard working family man who snaps right in front of you. And he creates a terrible act of violence against his own family, against his co-workers, against random people in the street. And then you always see the neighbors standing around saying “I don't understand how this happened because he was such a nice guy.” And I think in those moments, unlike serial killers where we look at them and we realize that we're seeing somebody that's so insane, I think when the 6:00 news story is about one of those people, those seemingly ordinary people who snaps, that we all look to ourselves and say “That's one of us. That's someone just like you and me who couldn't take it any longer.” And that's what I feel Falling Down is really about. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* I've always thought, thematically, this film is about where the extra ordinary meets the ordinary. And it's a familiar theme in literature and in film. A lot of times it's where the ordinary man meets an extra ordinary circumstance and has to deal with it. In this case, it's flipped around. It's where an extra ordinary man is meeting up with an ordinary circumstance, which is the climate that he's walking through, the city. And what makes him extra ordinary is his fearlessness, he's crossed a line and no longer fears the consequences of his actions. And I've always thought that, in a way, this is a kind of superpower that a person could have. A person who is not afraid to die has a superpower, and they're really hard to stop. And that is something that we're experiencing today. And also that's what the theme was of William Foster. I didn't do a lot of research for the character, because he's myself written large. So, it was a matter of projecting myself into this position of a person who feels that they've done everything right, and yet they're getting shafted. And add to this tendency to violence, which is something which has been kept tamped down for most of his life, it's only come out dribs and drabs here and there. - Ebbe Roe Smith
* I feel that the characters in the film that William Foster encounters were not specifically chosen to in any way criticize or cartoon the people. In a movie like this, it could've gone on for 50 hours, and there could've been all kinds of incidents (gas station, bus stop, train). What the writer Ebbe Roe Smith chose were things that we felt were typical to an ordinary day in LA. And I think that they represent frustrations, ordinary frustrations. Not complex unusual extraordinary ones. But simple everyday ones that we all have to deal with in a healthy way. And Foster is incapable of dealing with them. I mean, in the Korean grocery store, he could've easily just paid for the soda and walked out, but he can't because his psyche is evaporating. I think Foster is in a sense a dinosaur. Because the fact that he can't deal with the rules, the multicultural society, the injustices and problems if everyday life, don't make him right and them wrong. Also, they're not going to change for him, just as they're not going to change for us. Perhaps in the voting booth, our vote counts. But in day to day situations our vote doesn't count. When they tell you that they stopped serving breakfast at 11:30, and you still want your breakfast, your vote doesn't count. Now, it would be nice to pull out a machine gun, and get your breakfast. But we don't do that. The reason we don't do that is because, as wish fulfilling as that moment is, like Foster, we would cross a line. And once you cross that line, there's no going back. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* I think, it may be hard for people to remember or maybe they were too young, but the temperature in Los Angeles at that time, you know, [[w:1992 Los Angeles riots|the riots]] broke out right in the middle of shooting. The tension, the racial tension in the streets and the economic tension, you know, [[w:George H.W. Bush|Bush Sr.]] was the president, we were in a recession, there was bad stuff really going down, bad stuff legally, a real &quot;Fuck you!&quot; to a lot of people in the United States, especially the ones who couldn't fight for themselves. And I think you can see the anger brewing and then when the [[w:Rodney King|Rodney King]] verdict went down, we were on all the streets of L.A. obviously making Falling Down, and when you make a movie on the streets of any city, you have local police that protect you and help you. And movie police are great. They've seen it all, they've done it all, and they're so helpful, you can't make a movie without them because you're really in the way of every city when you're making a movie there. They told us weeks before the verdict that if it went down, so that the cops got away with it, there was going to be blood in the streets. And all of the black church leaders were begging for some kind of compassion because they said there was going to be blood in the streets, and when that verdict came down, and you saw what happened, and you know, there was a city in flames. It was, you know, rioting, and looting, and insanity going on in the city. And we knew it was going to happen. In fact, the cops got us home the minute that verdict went home, we stopped shooting. We were supposed to be in Inglewood, which was right in the heart of where the riots were happening. It would have been very hard to get a movie company out of there. But then we went right back two days later, we went right back on those streets, and shot, and people were great to us. A lot of the people you see in all the scenes in the movie are the people in that neighborhood that we were shooting in at the time, because I didn't want the street scenes to seem inauthentic, so we used a lot of the local people. We were supposed to be in Inglewood shooting the Whammy Burger scene, but the cops told us not to go there cause they knew what was going to happen if the verdict came down, so we were on the Warner Bros back lot doing close ups of Michael, and then the riots broke out. And of course, you know, everyone on the crew had spouses at work, had children in school, so they got us out and they told everybody to go home immediately. And I raced home over in Mulholland and then saw it on TV because I live in Bel-Air so by the time I got to Bel-Air the city of LA was on fire. And yeah it was an amazing thing to watch, you could see the hate and the venom and the outrage of the unfairness of the people who were rioting, you could see the unfairness of their life on the planet and in this city and how it was all coming out in this moment. Do I think they were all right to do that? No. But do I understand where it came from? Sure. Absolutely. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* The LA Times did 7 pieces against Falling Down. They were so outraged by this movie. They actually had someone walk that route across Los Angeles, and nothing happened to them. I loved all that, that was great. That actually made the movie a success, the outrage. They had defense workers picketing saying they weren't like that. There were doors that were closed to me that certainly flew open after Falling Down, and still do. There were a lot of people that looked at me as a much more serious filmmaker. I had made a lot of movies up to that point with very young cast, a lot of them unknown. And even though i'm very proud of those movies, and those casts, and even though I think they're about something, a lot of times when you make movies with young people, they're not taking it seriously. You know, there are people that have a lot of respect for the film. And that means a lot to me. But, I didn't do it for those reasons. It also made a lot of trouble. It's amazing to be talking about it after so many years, that it still has weight. But I think all of that credit belongs to Ebbe Roe Smith. I had one of the greatest casts in the world, they did a brilliant job, all that credit belongs to them. Andrzej Bartkowiak did a great job shooting it. Barbara Ling did a great job bringing Los Angeles to life, she was our production designer. Marlene Stewart was our costume designer. And even thought in a contemporary film those jobs seem invisible, they're there and they did it. But it's Ebbe Roe Smith's writing. When he created this character, it hit a nerve in him, it hit a nerve in all of us who made it. And it obviously hit a nerve in the audience, even the people that were outraged by the movie, there's no bigger nerve hitting than outrage. Ebbe was a first time writer, and he's an actor. And I think that one of the reasons Falling Down hit a nerve with me when I read it, with everyone who read it. And all the wonderful cast that came to do it, but ultimately the public, and a lot of the press which was positive and negative, but I think the reason Falling Down still resonates is because of Ebbe Roe Smith's wonderful script. - [[w:Joel Schumacher|Joel Schumacher]]
* Falling Down, I think, if anything it's about, maybe, the point of views, and the problem that strife in society happens when you're unable to appreciate the point of view of another person. You're unable to put yourself in their shoes. You lock yourself off away from that. And people start wars over it. I think it’s a lot of that. Compromising is the secret to a society, and when people start to shut themselves off from it, then there's only one place that energy can go, and it's into a negative space, into a negative area. And it hardens opinion, and nothing is done. Nothing is pushed forward. The walls are built up, and there's no place for that energy to go but to a bad place. - Ebbe Roe Smith

== Cast ==
* [[w:Michael Douglas|Michael Douglas]] - William Foster
* [[w:Robert Duvall|Robert Duvall]] - Sgt. Martin Prendergast
* [[w:Barbara Hershey|Barbara Hershey]] - Elizabeth Tavino
* [[w:Rachel Ticotin|Rachel Ticotin]] - Det. Sandra Torres
* [[w:Tuesday Weld|Tuesday Weld]] - Amanda Prendergast
* [[w:Frederic Forrest|Frederic Forrest]] - Nick, the army surplus store owner
* [[w:Lois Smith|Lois Smith]] - William Foster's mother
* Joey Hope Singer - Adele Foster-Tavino
* [[w:Michael Paul Chan|Michael Paul Chan]] - Mr. Lee, the convenience store owner
* [[w:Raymond J. Barry|Raymond J. Barry]] - Capt. William Yardley
* [[w:D. W. Moffett|D. W. Moffett]] - Det. Lydecker
* [[w:Steve Park (comedian)|Steve Park]] - Detective Brian
* [[w:Karina Arroyave|Karina Arroyave]] - Angie
* [[w:Brent Hinkley|Brent Hinkley]] - Rick
* [[w:Dedee Pfeiffer|Dedee Pfeiffer]] - Sheila Folsom

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0106856}}
* {{amg movie|16651}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|falling_down}}
* {{metacritic film|falling-down|Falling Down}}

[[Category:1993 films]]
[[Category:1993 American films]]
[[Category:1990s American films]]
[[Category:Crime thriller films]]
[[Category:Films set in Los Angeles]]
[[Category:Vigilante films]]
[[Category:Action thriller films]]
[[Category:Films about consumerism]]
[[Category:Films directed by Joel Schumacher]]</text>
      <sha1>4lir85imqduiyvgrxpg4p7al7rtahu9</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wikiquote:Vandalism in progress</title>
    <ns>4</ns>
    <id>4250</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964835</id>
      <parentid>3964453</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:10:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>MathXplore</username>
        <id>3050778</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* New report 2026-07-14, 12:07 */ new topic ([[mw:c:Special:MyLanguage/User:JWBTH/CD|CD]])</comment>
      <origin>3964835</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1976" sha1="r0c8kdo647fl656q972rymdox6g9qdi" xml:space="preserve">{{/header}} {{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Vandalism in progress/Archive/%(counter)d
|algo = old(10d)
|counter = 16
|maxarchivesize = 300K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 1
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}
&lt;!-- Please add a new report below this line, thanks! --&gt;

== New report 2026-07-4, 16:28 ==

* {{Vandal|~2026-34509-30}}

Repeatedly removed the VFD notice from [[My Hero Academia|an article I nominated for deletion]] and is currently actively edit warring. [[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] ([[User talk:03isrflo62410|talk]]) 17:18, 4 July 2026 (UTC)
: @[[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] The page is under autopatroller protection for one week, but please do not edit war, since it is considered disruptive. If this temporary account keeps disrupting elsewhere, ping me and I will block them. Thank you. [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 18:06, 4 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-7, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Konstantinhamilton0}}

Spam ([[Special:Contributions/Martha.wilson9]], [[Special:Contributions/Mikhailsims]]). [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:11, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Blocked}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 15:26, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-13, 11:42 ==

* {{Vandal|Alikanwal}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:35, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 16:37, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:07 ==

* {{Vandal|National Executive Transfers}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:10, 14 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>r0c8kdo647fl656q972rymdox6g9qdi</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964879</id>
      <parentid>3964835</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:04:15Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>MathXplore</username>
        <id>3050778</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* New report 2026-07-14, 12:10 */ new topic ([[mw:c:Special:MyLanguage/User:JWBTH/CD|CD]])</comment>
      <origin>3964879</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2133" sha1="3xyfg6v7ul55yy2puo9ksqxdz5m3yt5" xml:space="preserve">{{/header}} {{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Vandalism in progress/Archive/%(counter)d
|algo = old(10d)
|counter = 16
|maxarchivesize = 300K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 1
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}
&lt;!-- Please add a new report below this line, thanks! --&gt;

== New report 2026-07-4, 16:28 ==

* {{Vandal|~2026-34509-30}}

Repeatedly removed the VFD notice from [[My Hero Academia|an article I nominated for deletion]] and is currently actively edit warring. [[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] ([[User talk:03isrflo62410|talk]]) 17:18, 4 July 2026 (UTC)
: @[[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] The page is under autopatroller protection for one week, but please do not edit war, since it is considered disruptive. If this temporary account keeps disrupting elsewhere, ping me and I will block them. Thank you. [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 18:06, 4 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-7, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Konstantinhamilton0}}

Spam ([[Special:Contributions/Martha.wilson9]], [[Special:Contributions/Mikhailsims]]). [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:11, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Blocked}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 15:26, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-13, 11:42 ==

* {{Vandal|Alikanwal}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:35, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 16:37, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:07 ==

* {{Vandal|National Executive Transfers}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:10, 14 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Polyfinish}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 13:04, 14 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>3xyfg6v7ul55yy2puo9ksqxdz5m3yt5</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964966</id>
      <parentid>3964879</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:32:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Koavf</username>
        <id>6765</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* New report 2026-07-14, 12:07 */ Reply</comment>
      <origin>3964966</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2400" sha1="l2ybbheqxfp9mcpk11js1ok9xj170uj" xml:space="preserve">{{/header}} {{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Vandalism in progress/Archive/%(counter)d
|algo = old(10d)
|counter = 16
|maxarchivesize = 300K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 1
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}
&lt;!-- Please add a new report below this line, thanks! --&gt;

== New report 2026-07-4, 16:28 ==

* {{Vandal|~2026-34509-30}}

Repeatedly removed the VFD notice from [[My Hero Academia|an article I nominated for deletion]] and is currently actively edit warring. [[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] ([[User talk:03isrflo62410|talk]]) 17:18, 4 July 2026 (UTC)
: @[[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] The page is under autopatroller protection for one week, but please do not edit war, since it is considered disruptive. If this temporary account keeps disrupting elsewhere, ping me and I will block them. Thank you. [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 18:06, 4 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-7, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Konstantinhamilton0}}

Spam ([[Special:Contributions/Martha.wilson9]], [[Special:Contributions/Mikhailsims]]). [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:11, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Blocked}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 15:26, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-13, 11:42 ==

* {{Vandal|Alikanwal}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:35, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 16:37, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:07 ==

* {{Vandal|National Executive Transfers}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:10, 14 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 14:32, 14 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Polyfinish}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 13:04, 14 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>l2ybbheqxfp9mcpk11js1ok9xj170uj</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964967</id>
      <parentid>3964966</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:32:40Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Koavf</username>
        <id>6765</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* New report 2026-07-14, 12:10 */ Reply</comment>
      <origin>3964967</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2667" sha1="4c69246ja0o1q4zdxh6q5fe13ga8mgp" xml:space="preserve">{{/header}} {{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Vandalism in progress/Archive/%(counter)d
|algo = old(10d)
|counter = 16
|maxarchivesize = 300K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 1
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}
&lt;!-- Please add a new report below this line, thanks! --&gt;

== New report 2026-07-4, 16:28 ==

* {{Vandal|~2026-34509-30}}

Repeatedly removed the VFD notice from [[My Hero Academia|an article I nominated for deletion]] and is currently actively edit warring. [[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] ([[User talk:03isrflo62410|talk]]) 17:18, 4 July 2026 (UTC)
: @[[User:03isrflo62410|03isrflo62410]] The page is under autopatroller protection for one week, but please do not edit war, since it is considered disruptive. If this temporary account keeps disrupting elsewhere, ping me and I will block them. Thank you. [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 18:06, 4 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-7, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Konstantinhamilton0}}

Spam ([[Special:Contributions/Martha.wilson9]], [[Special:Contributions/Mikhailsims]]). [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:11, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Blocked}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 15:26, 7 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-13, 11:42 ==

* {{Vandal|Alikanwal}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:35, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 16:37, 13 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:07 ==

* {{Vandal|National Executive Transfers}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 12:10, 14 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 14:32, 14 July 2026 (UTC)

== New report 2026-07-14, 12:10 ==

* {{Vandal|Polyfinish}}

Spam. [[User:MathXplore|MathXplore]] ([[User talk:MathXplore|talk]]) 13:04, 14 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{done}} ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 14:32, 14 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>4c69246ja0o1q4zdxh6q5fe13ga8mgp</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Digimon</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>4361</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965065</id>
      <parentid>3941938</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:48:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Original description</comment>
      <origin>3965065</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1424" sha1="1bkba2mch8fuqf7l2hllstz83j0weny" xml:space="preserve">'''''{{w|Digimon}}''''', short for &quot;Digital Monsters&quot;, is a Japanese media franchise that encompasses virtual pet toys, anime, manga, video games, films, and trading card games.

==TV shows==
* ''[[Digimon Adventure|Digimon Adventure (1999)]]''
* ''[[Digimon Adventure#Digimon Adventure 02|Digimon Adventure 02]]''
* ''[[Digimon Tamers]]''
* ''[[Digimon Frontier]]''
* ''[[Digimon Data Squad]]''
* ''[[Digimon Fusion]]''
* ''[[Digimon Universe: App Monsters]]''
* ''[[Digimon Adventure (2020 TV series)|Digimon Adventure (2020)]]''
* ''[[Digimon Ghost Game]]''
* ''[[Digimon Beatbreak]]''

==Film==
* ''[[Digimon: The Movie]]''
* ''[[Digimon Adventure 3D: Digimon Grand Prix!]]''
* ''[[Digimon Adventure 02: Revenge of Diaboromon]]''
* ''[[Digimon Tamers: Battle of Adventurers]]''
* ''[[Digimon Tamers: Runaway Locomon]]''
* ''[[Digimon Frontier: Island of Lost Digimon]]''
* ''[[Digimon X-Evolution]]''
* ''[[Digimon Data Squad 3D: The Digital World in Imminent Danger!]]''
* ''[[Digimon Data Squad: Ultimate Power! Activate Burst Mode!!]]''
* ''[[Digimon Adventure tri.: Reunion]]
* ''[[Digimon Adventure tri.: Determination]]
* ''[[Digimon Adventure tri.: Confession]]
* ''[[Digimon Adventure tri.: Loss]]
* ''[[Digimon Adventure tri.: Coexistence]]
* ''[[Digimon Adventure tri.: Future]]
* ''[[Digimon Adventure: Last Evolution Kizuna]]''
* ''[[Digimon Adventure 02: The Beginning]]''

[[Category:Disambiguation pages]]</text>
      <sha1>1bkba2mch8fuqf7l2hllstz83j0weny</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ted Pappas</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>4366</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964938</id>
      <parentid>3190663</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:07:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Lizaphukan21</username>
        <id>3313169</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Wikification and spelling: Added internal Wikipedia links and corrected the spelling/formatting of Encyclopædia Britannica.</comment>
      <origin>3964938</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="895" sha1="mq0t82l49wqjrn7txshkdhbc61ppcwx" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Ted Pappas is the current executive editor of ''[[w:Encyclopædia Britannica|Encyclopædia Britannica]]'', and a leading critic of [[w:Wikipedia|Wikipedia]].

{{people-stub}}

==Quotes==
* The premise of Wikipedia is that continuous improvement will lead to perfection, that premise is completely unproven…with many of the pieces you don't know who it's written by, and who the administrators are…one of the administrators overseeing the political coverage openly encourages people to vote for John Kerry…30,000 articles were created by a bot [an automated program that goes round causing havoc]…hyperlinks, bulletpoints and cut-and-paste press releases do not an encyclopedia entry make.
**Who knows?&quot;, ''The Guardian'', Tuesday, October 26, 2004.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Pappas, Ted}}
[[Category:Authors]]
[[Category:Editors]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>mq0t82l49wqjrn7txshkdhbc61ppcwx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Terence Ranger</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>5137</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964936</id>
      <parentid>3493420</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:06:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Lizaphukan21</username>
        <id>3313169</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Biographical update and grammar: Updated vital dates and tense (subject passed away in 2015) and corrected unnecessary capitalization of &quot;history&quot;.</comment>
      <origin>3964936</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1450" sha1="4u77031i1clwyxl1fm0xhc554z1reww" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Terence Osborn Ranger (1929–2015) was a prominent African historian, focusing much of his work on the colonial history of Zimbabwe. Much of his work was conducted in the 1960s and '70s, as part of the post-colonial generation of historians.

{{people-stub}}

==Quotes==

* Churches which emphasise ecstatic possession by the spirit, which foster prophecy and spiritual healing and [[exorcism]] have been seen as continuations of African belief and practice. Yet these very features, which are taken as being most African, are in reality the most Christian aspect of such churches. They spring directly from increasingly strong tendencies in world Christianity in the late nineteenth and twentieth centuries. They spring in fact either from anti-establishment Christian Pentecostalism, as it developed in Europe and North America, or from evangelical revivalist tendencies within the major mission churches themselves. Few independent church leaders have claimed to be continuing African traditions.
** ''Religion, Development and African Christian Identity'', page 31.

== References ==
* Ranger, Terence ([[1987]]). ''Religion, Development and African Christian Identity''. In [[Kirsten Holst Petersen|K. Holst Petersen]] (red.), ''Religion, Development and African Identity'' (side 29-54). Uppsala: Scandinavian Institute of African Studies. {{ISBN|91-7106-263-7}}.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Authors|Ranger, Terence]]</text>
      <sha1>4u77031i1clwyxl1fm0xhc554z1reww</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Shrek 2</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>5645</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965194</id>
      <parentid>3964654</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T05:54:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35862-56</username>
        <id>3343694</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965194</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="49010" sha1="oi6qajfs1mpdy3docrvp15uxmtrusjq" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Shrek 2.png|thumb|]]
'''''[[w:Shrek 2|Shrek 2]]''''' is a [[w:2004 in film|2004]] [[w:animated film|animated film]] in which Princess Fiona's parents invite her and Shrek to dinner to celebrate her marriage, not knowing that the newlyweds are both ogres. It is a sequel to the [[Shrek|previous film]]. Produced by [[w:DreamWorks Animation|DreamWorks Animation]], streaming on [[w:Universal Pictures|Peacock]].
:''Directed by [[w:Andrew Adamson|Andrew Adamson]], [[w:Kelly Asbury|Kelly Asbury]], and [[w:Conrad Vernon|Conrad Vernon]]. Written by [[w:Andrew Adamson|Andrew Adamson]], [[w:Joe Stillman|Joe Stillman]], [[w:J. David Stem|J. David Stem]], and [[w:David N. Weiss|David N. Weiss]].''
{{center|'''Once Upon Another Time...'''([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

== Shrek ==
* For five minutes. Could you not be yourself...'''FOR FIVE MINUTES?! '''''AHHHHH!!! ARE WE THERE YET?!?!'''''
* Nice catch, Donkey. ''['''Puss''': Finally. Good use for your mouth.]''
* A cute, button nose? Thick, wavy locks? Taut, round buttocks? I'm-I'm... ''['''Jill''': Gorgeous.]''
*''[Banging the window, shouting for Fiona]'' Fiona! Fiona! Fiona! Fionaaaaa! ''['''Fairy Godmother''': Fiona? Fiona? Oh, shoot. I don't think they can us, pigeon.]''
* But I love her. ''['''Fairy Godmother''': If you really love her, you'll let her go.]''
* ''[from DVD menu, after pressing &quot;New from DreamWorks Animation&quot;]'' All right! Well, here we go!

== Puss in Boots ==
[[File:Puss in Boots, 2011, Australia-1.jpg|200px|thumb|Haha! Fear me if you dare!]]
* Who dares enter my room?
* You are told correct. But for this, I charge a great deal of money.
* Hmm. You have engaged my valuable services. Your Majesty. Just tell me where i can find this ogre.
* Haha! Fear me if you dare!
* Pray from mercy from Puss in Boots!
* Finally! A good use for your mouth.
* ''['''Guard''': Catnip.]'' That's, uh, not mine.
* ''[from DVD menu, after pressing &quot;Special Features&quot;]'' Glad to be of assistance.

== Fiona ==
* Dear diary, Sleeping Beauty is having a slumber party tomorrow, but Dad says I can't go. He never lets me out after sunset. Dad says I'm going away for a while, must be like some finishing school or something. Mom says that when I'm old enough, my handsome Prince Charming will rescue me from my tower and bring me back to my family and, we'll all live happily ever after.
* ''[from DVD menu, after pressing &quot;Far Far Away Idol&quot;, burping]'' Excuse me!

==Dialogue==
:''[first lines]''
:'''Prince Charming''': ''[his first words; narrating in his smoking, romantic, luscious, lustrous, regal, soothing and sexy voice]'' Once upon a time in a kingdom far, far away, the King and Queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl, and throughout the land, everyone was happy...until the sun went down, and they saw that their daughter was cursed with a frightful enchantment that took hold each and every night. Desperate, they sought the help of a fairy godmother who had them lock the young princess away in a tower, there to await the kiss of the handsome Prince Charming. ''[the scene shows a tall slightly muscular Prince Charming in a a cuirass and armor with a Red cape riding on his white horse]'' It was he who would chance the perilous journey through blistering cold and scorching desert, traveling for many days and nights, risking life and limb to reach the Dragon's Keep. ''[he rides through a forest, snowy mountains and barren desert for several days,arrives at the Dragon's Keep, an ominous castle surrounded by a moat of lava, but sees that the wooden bridge leading across the lava was destroyed by the Dragon. Uses his bow to shoot a roped arrow to a wooden post on the other side and uses it as a zipline. Looks up at a tower that rises above the rest of the castle, a light shining from its window. He enters the Dragon's Keep]'' For he was ''the'' bravest, ''[takes off his helmet showing his drop-dead gorgeous pretty slim face, bewitching blue eyes, high cheekbones, fair skin, pronounced smashing jawline and strong chin, thick exquisite stunning blonde eyebrows, elegant graceful slender pointy nose and his lips covered in cherry flavored glitter lip gloss forming an alluring bonny winsome ravishing pulchritudinous irresistible and heavenly smile]'' and most handsome... ''[unties his hairnet and shakes in slow motion his Just washed and clean with shampoo and conditioner, beautiful, majestic, glossy, gorgeous, shiny, silky, lustrous, glorious, flowing, marvelous, wavy, smooth, soft and ricocheting neck length blonde hair]'' ...In all the land. And it was destiny that his kiss ''[sprays perfume in his mouth to have a good breath]'' would break the dreaded curse. He alone would climb to the highest room of the tallest tower to the princess's chambers, cross the room to her sleeping silhouette, pull back the gossamer curtains to find her... ''[continues through the abandoned castle and reaches the princess' tower. enters the princess' room and makes his way to her bed where a figure lays down, obscured by the bed's curtains, pulls the curtain and gasps; the figure is no princess--it's Big Bad Wolf.]'' 
:'''Big Bad Wolf''': What? 
:'''Prince Charming''': Princess... Fiona?
:'''Big Bad Wolf''': No!
:'''Prince Charming''': Oh, thank heavens. Where is she?
:'''Big Bad Wolf''': She's on her honeymoon.   
:'''Prince Charming''': Honeymoon? With whom?!

----
:'''Shrek''': It's so good to be home! Just you and me and...
:'''Donkey''': Two can be as bad as one...
:'''Shrek''': Donkey?
:'''Donkey''': Shrek! Fiona! Aren't you two a sight for sore eyes! Give us a hug, Shrek, you old love machine. And look at you, Mrs. Shrek. How 'bout a side of sugar for the steed?
:'''Shrek''': Donkey, what are you doing here?
:'''Donkey''': Oh, I was just taking care of your love nest for you!
:'''Shrek''': Oh, you mean like sorting the mail and watering the plants?
:'''Donkey''': Yeah, and feeding the fish!
:'''Shrek''': I don't have any fish.
:'''Donkey''': You do now. I call that one Shrek and the other Fiona. That Shrek is a rascally devil. Get your... ''[mumbling to the &quot;fish&quot;]''
:'''Shrek''': Oh, will you look at the time? I guess you'd better be going.
:'''Donkey''': Don't you wanna tell me all about your trip? Or how about a game of Parcheesi?
:'''Fiona''': Actually, Donkey, shouldn't you be getting home to Dragon?
:'''Donkey''': Oh, yeah, that. I don't know. She's been all moody and stuff lately. So I thought I'd move back in with you guys!
:'''Fiona''': Well, you know, we're always happy to see you, Donkey.  
:'''Shrek''': But Fiona and I are married now. We need a little time, you know, to be together. Just with each other. Alone.
:'''Donkey''': Say no more, say no more. You don't have to worry about a thing. I will always be here to make sure nobody bothers you.
:'''Shrek''': Donkey!
:'''Donkey''': Yes, roomie?
:'''Shrek''': ''You're'' bothering ''me.''
:'''Donkey''': Oh, okay, all right. Cool. Me and Pinocchio were just gonna try to catch a tournament anyway, so maybe I'll see y'all on Sunday for a barbecue or something. ''[heads outside]''
:'''Shrek''': He'll be fine. Now where were we? ''[realizes]'' Oh, I think I remember. ''[leans in to kiss Fiona, but suddenly sees Donkey in front of him]'' Donkey!
:'''Donkey''': I know, I know! Alone! I'm going! I'm going! Hey, what do you want me to tell those other guys?

----
:'''Messenger''': ''[swats Reggie with the scroll]'' Enough, Reggie. ''[unfolds the scroll]'' &quot;Dearest, Princess Fiona. You are hereby summoned to the Kingdom of Far, Far Away for a royal ball in celebration of your marriage at which time the King will bestow his royal blessing upon you ''[looks up to see Shrek]'' and your... uh... Prince Charming. Love, the King and Queen of Far, Far Away. ''[closes the scroll]'' aka, Mom and Dad.&quot;
:'''Fiona''': Mom and Dad?
:'''Shrek''': Prince Charming?
:'''Donkey''': ''[heads outside]'' Royal ball?! Can I come?
:'''Shrek''': We're not going.
:'''Fiona and Donkey''': ''[shocked]'' What?
:'''Shrek''': I mean, don't you think they might be a bit... shocked to see you like this?
:'''Fiona''': Well, they might be a bit surprised. But they're my parents, Shrek. They love me. And don't worry, they're gonna love you, too.
:'''Shrek''': Yeah, right. Somehow, I don't think I'll be welcome at the country club.
:'''Fiona''': Will you stop it? They're not like that.
:'''Shrek''': Then how do you explain Sergeant Pompous and the Fancy Pants Club Band?
:'''Fiona''': Oh, come on! You could at least give them a chance!
:'''Shrek''': Oh, to do what, sharpen their pitchforks?
:'''Fiona''': No, they just want to give you their blessing.
:'''Shrek''': Oh, great. Now I need their blessing?
:'''Fiona''': Well, if you wanna be a part of this family, yes!
:'''Shrek''': And ''who'' says I wanna be a part of this family?
:'''Fiona''': Um, ''you'' did, when you married ''me''!
:'''Shrek''': Well, there's some fine print for you!
:'''Fiona''': ''[sighs exasperatedly]'' So, that's it? You won't come?
:'''Shrek''': Trust me, it's a bad idea. We are not going, and ''that's final!''

----
:''[Shrek gulps at the dinner table. To his sides sits Lillian and Fiona, and across from him sits Harold. Lillian looks around nervously and Harold angrily stares at Shrek. Shrek, unsure of how to eat the food on his plate properly, plops it in his mouth, and grins with the food still stuck in his teeth. Lillian cringes. Fiona tries to sip her drink courteously]''
:'''Fiona''': ''[lets out a loud belch that interrupts a conversation]'' Oh! Excuse me.
:'''Shrek''': Better out than in, I always say. Eh, Fiona? ''[he and Fiona laughed]'' That's good enough... '' [they stopped laughing after neither Harold nor Lillian join in]'' I guess not.
:'''Donkey''': ''[from another room]'' What do you mean, &quot;not on the list&quot;? Don't tell me you don't know who I am. ''[bursts into the scene from the kitchen]'' Hey! What's happening, everybody? Thanks for waiting. You know I had the hardest time finding this place. ''[sits next to Harold]''
:'''Harold''': ''[angrily]'' No, no! Bad Donkey! Bad, down!
:'''Fiona''': No, no, no, Dad! Dad! It's all right! It's all right. He’s with us. He helped rescue me from the dragon.
:'''Donkey''': Yup, that's me: the noble steed. ''[to the server]'' Hey, waiter! How ‘bout a bowl for the steed?
:'''Shrek''': Oh, boy. ''[slurps from the bowl]''
:'''Fiona''': Um, Shrek?
:'''Shrek''': Yeah? Oh, sorry! Great soup, Mrs Q. Mmm!
:'''Fiona''': No, no, no. Darling. ''[demonstrates that the bowl he ate from is for washing his hands]''
:'''Shrek''': Oh. ''[chuckles]''
:'''Lillian''': ''[as the rest does the same]'' So, Fiona, tell us about where you live?
:'''Fiona''': Well, Shrek owns his own land. ''[to Shrek]'' Don't you, honey?
:'''Shrek''': Oh, yes! It's in an enchanted forest abundant in squirrels and...cute little duckies and--
:'''Donkey''': What?! ''[laughs]'' I know you ain't talkin' about the swamp!
:'''Shrek''': ''[clenches through his teeth]'' Donkey.
:'''Harold''': An ogre from a swamp. Oh! How original. ''[Donkey dunks his mouth in his bowl and drinks]''
:'''Lillian''': Well, I suppose that would be a fine place to raise the children...
:''[Harold starts choking on his drink and Shrek accidentally swallows his spoon. They both cough, choke and splutter until Shrek spits out his spoon onto the table.]''
:'''Shrek''': ''[chuckles]'' It's a bit early to be thinking about that, isn't it?
:'''Harold''': Indeed. I just started eating.
:'''Lillian''': Harold!
:'''Shrek''': What's that supposed to mean?
:'''Fiona''': Dad, it's great, okay?
:'''Harold''': Well, for his type, yes.
:'''Shrek''': ''[offended]'' ''My'' type?!
:'''Donkey''': ''[starts to leave, nervously]'' Uh, I gotta go to the bathroom.
:'''The Chef''': ''[he and a host of servers enter the room with dinner, including a whole turkey, lobster, and a roast pig]'' Dinner is-a served!
:'''Donkey''': ''[sits back down]'' Never mind, I can hold it. ''[The servers set the food on the table.]''
:'''The Chef''': Bon appetit!
:'''Donkey''': Oh, Mexican food! My favorite!
:'''Lillian''': Well, let's just not sit here with our tummies rumblin', everybody dig in.
:'''Donkey''': Don't mind if I do, Lillian!
:'''Harold''': ''[pulls the lobster towards himself before Donkey can take a bite out of it]'' So, I suppose any grandchildren I could expect from you would be--
:'''Shrek''': ''[pulls the turkey towards him]'' Ogres? ''Yes.''
:'''Lillian''': Not that there's anything wrong with that. Right, Harold?
:'''Harold''': Oh, no! No! Of course, not! That is, assuming you don't ''[ferociously and savagely stabs the knife into the lobster]'' ''EAT'' your own ''[ferociously and savagely slices open the lobster]'' ''YOUNG!''
:'''Fiona''': Dad!
:'''Shrek''': Oh, no, we usually prefer the ones who've been... ''[ferociously and savagely rips off both drumsticks from the turkey]'' ''LOCKED'' away in a tower! ''[ferociously and savagely takes a bite out of one drumstick in his left hand]''
:'''Fiona''': ''[begging]'' Shrek, please!
:'''Harold''': I only did that because I '''''love''''' her.
:'''Shrek''': Oh, aye! Daycare or dragon-guarded castle?! ''[ferociously and savagely pulls out a wish bone from the turkey]''
:'''Harold''': You wouldn't understand! You're not her father!
:''[Fiona sighs in exasperation and facepalms herself as Shrek and Harold continue to rip apart their food in ferocity and savagery, sending bits and pieces flying across the table.]''
:'''Lillian''': It's so nice to have the family together for dinner. ''[Shrek and Harold stand up from their seats in rage and glare at each other, then ferociously and savagely tug over the roast pig in the middle of the table, accidentally sending it flying upwards]'' Harold!
:'''Fiona''': Shrek!
:'''Shrek''': Fiona?!
:'''Harold''': Fiona!
:'''Fiona''': Mom!
:'''Lillian''': Harold!
:'''Donkey''': ''[happily]'' Donkey!
:''[The roast pig lands on the table in front of Donkey and Lillian with a thud; Fiona angrily stands up and glares at Harold and Shrek, then runs out of the room, causing Harold to become enraged and Shrek to sigh.]''

----
:'''Shrek''': Fiona? Fiona?! ''[barges into the room along with Donkey. Fairy Godmother gasps at Shrek]''
:'''Donkey''': Oh, you got a puppy?! All I got in my room was shampoo.
:'''Fiona''': Oh, um, Fairy Godmother, furniture, I'd like you to meet my husband, Shrek.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[confused]'' Your husband? What did you say? When did this happen?
:'''Fiona''': Shrek is the one ''who'' rescued me.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[angrily]'' But that can't be right!
:'''Shrek''': ''[wearily]'' Oh, great! More relatives!
:'''Fiona''': She's just trying to help.
:'''Shrek''': Good! She can help us pack. Get your coat, dear. We're leaving.
:'''Fiona''': What?!
:'''Donkey''': Leaving? I don't wanna leave.
:'''Fiona''': When did you decide this?
:'''Shrek''': ''[as he is packing]'' Shortly after arrivin'.
:'''Fiona''': ''[remorsefully]'' Look, I'm sorry...
:'''Fairy Godmother''': No, no, no, that's okay. I need to go anyway. But remember, dear, if you should ever need me, ''[whips out a &quot;Happiness&quot; business card]'' happiness is just a teardrop away.
:'''Shrek''': ''[snatches the &quot;Happiness&quot; card from Fairy Godmother; sarcastically]'' Thanks, but we've got ''all'' the happiness we need. Happy, happy, happy.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': So I see. ''[laughs in a not so good way]'' Let's go, Kyle. ''[Kyle whips the horses on the carriage and he and the Fairy Godmother leaves]''
:'''Fiona''': ''[sarcastically]'' Very nice, Shrek.
:'''Shrek''': What? I told you that comin' here was a bad idea.
:'''Fiona''': You could have at least tried to get along with my father.
:'''Shrek''': You know, somehow, I don't think I was going to get daddy's blessing, even if I did want it.
:'''Fiona''': ''[as a bichon Frise starts barking]'' Well, do you think it might be nice if somebody asked me what I wanted?!
:'''Shrek''': Sure. Do you want me to pack for you?!
:'''Fiona''': You're unbelievable! You're behavin' like a... ''[hesitates and sighs]''
:'''Shrek''': Go on, say it!
:'''Fiona''': Like an ''OGRE!''
:'''Shrek''': Well, here's a newsflash for you, whether your parents like it or not, '''''I AM AN OGRE.''''' ''[the puppy barks even louder; Shrek furiously and roars at it, scares the puppy, who covers its face in fear]'' And guess what, Princess? That's '''''NOT''''' about to change.
:'''Fiona''': ''[sadly walks to the door]'' I've made changes for you, Shrek. Think about that. ''[leaves]''
:'''Donkey''': ''[deadpan]'' That's real smooth, Shrek. ''[imitating Shrek]'' ''I'M AN OGRE! UARGH!''
:''[Shrek walks to the door and hears Fiona sob from outside of the bedroom and sighs in guilt, realizing what he has done to hurt her feelings. The camera pans northeast to Harold and Lillian's room.]''
:'''Harold''': ''[after hearing Shrek and Fiona's argument]'' I knew this would happen!
:'''Lillian''': You should. You started it.
:'''Harold''': I can hardly believe that, Lillian. I mean, really, he's the ogre, not me.
:'''Lillian''': I think, Harold, you're taking this a little too personally. ''This'' is Fiona's choice.
:'''Harold''': Yes, but she was supposed to choose the prince ''we'' picked out for her! I mean, you expect me to give my blessings to this... this... thing?
:'''Lillian''': Fiona does, and she'll never forgive you if you don't. I don't want to lose our daughter again, Harold. ''[Harold sighs]'' Oh, you act as if love is totally predictable. Don't you remember when we were young and, oh, we used to walk down by the lily pond, and they were in bloom.
:'''Harold''': Our first kiss. IT'S NOT THE SAME! I don't think you realize that our daughter has married a MONSTER!
:'''Lillian''': Oh, stop being such a drama king.
:'''Harold''': ''[as Fairy Godmother's carriage approaches]'' Fine, fine! Pretend that there's nothing wrong! La-di-da, di-da, di-da! It's all wonderful! I like to know how could it get any worse!
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[opens the door]'' Hello, Harold.
:'''Harold''': ''[scared]'' Aaah!
:'''Lillian''': What happened?
:'''Harold''': ''[hesitantly]'' Uh, nothing! Nothing, dear! Just the old crusade wound playing up a bit! ''[chuckles]'' I’ll just stretch it out here for a while. ''[closes the balcony door]''
:'''Fairy Godmother''': You better get in. We need to talk.
:'''Harold''': Actually, Fairy Godmother, just off to bed. ''[yawns]'' Already taken my pills, and they tend to make me a bit drowsy. So, um how about… we make this a quick visit. What? ''[bumps into two of her henchmen, who then get him in the carriage]'' Oh, hello.

----
:'''Harold''': So, what's new?
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[to Harold]'' You remember my son, Prince Charming? ''[shows him sitting next to her]''
:'''Harold''': Charming! Is that you? My gosh, it's been years! When, uh... When did you get back?
:'''Prince Charming''': Oh, about five minutes ago, actually. ''[enraged]'' After I endured blistering winds, scorching desert, I climbed to the highest room of the tallest tower--
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[cuts him off]'' Tut, tut, tut. Mummy can handle this. ''[to King Harold, using the same tone he used earlier]'' He endures blistering winds and scorching desert! He climbs to the highest bloody room of the tallest bloody tower, and what does he find? Some gender-confused wolf telling him that ''his'' princess... '''''is already married!'''''
:'''Harold''': ''[stammers]'' I mean, it wasn't my fault; He didn't get there in time.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': '''''STOP THE CAR!''' [the carriage screeches to a stop]'' Harold... ''[two of her henchmen crack their knuckles as the window rolls down]'' You forced me to do something I '''''really''''' don't want to do.
:'''Harold''': ''[gasps]'' Where are we?
:''[It is revealed that the carriage has pulled up at a fast-food restaurant drive-thru.]''
:'''Fast-food Clerk''': ''[cheerfully]'' Well, hi there! Welcome to Friar's Fat Boy. May I take your order?
:'''Fairy Godmother''': My diet is ruined! I hope you're happy. ''[to the fast-food clerk]'' Uh, okay. Two renaissance wraps, no mayo... chili rings...
:'''Prince Charming''': I'll have the medieval meal.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': One medieval meal and, Harold. Curly fries?
:'''Harold''': No, thank you.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Sourdough soft taco, then? What do you want?
:'''Harold''': No, really. I'm fine.
:'''Fast-food Clerk''': ''[gives Fairy Godmother their meals]'' Your order, Fairy Godmother. ''[also gives her a free double-headed toy axe]'' And ''this'' comes with the medieval meal.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[gives the axe to Charming]'' Here you are, dear. ''[the carriage flies away]'' You see, we made a deal, Harold, and I assume you don't want me to go back on my part.
:'''Harold''': ''[sighs deeply]'' Indeed not.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': So, Fiona and Charming ''will be together''.
:'''Harold''': ''[doubtfully]'' Yes.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Oh, believe me, Harold. It's what's best, not only for your daughter.''[She takes a bite of her wrap taco and talks with her mouth full]'' But for your kingdom.
:''[The carriage pulls up back at the castle and one of her henchmen shoves Harold out]''
:'''Harold''': Well, what am ''I'' supposed to do about it?
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[tosses the double-headed toy axe into his hands]'' Use your imagination. ''[flies off]''

----
:'''Harold''': Uh, no. You must be mistaking me for someone else. Uh, excuse me. I'm looking for the Ugly Stepsister. ''[said Ugly Stepsister reveals herself]'' Ah. There you are. Right. You see, I need to have someone taken care of.
:'''Ugly Stepsister''': Who's the guy?
:'''Harold''': Um, he's not a guy, per se, um, he's ''[whispers]'' an ''ogre''.
:''[The entire bar gasp at Harold saying &quot;ogre&quot;; the piano stops playing.]''
:'''Ugly Stepsister''': Hey, buddy, let me clue you in. There's only one fellow who can handle a job like that, and, frankly... he don't like to be ''disturbed''.
:'''Harold''': Where could I find him? ''[heads to the backroom and knocks, slowly opens the door]'' Uh, hello? ''[sees a pair of black boots beside the shining window]''
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[opens his eyes]'' Who dares enter my room?
:'''Harold''': Sorry. I hope I'm not interrupting anything. But I was told that you are the one to handle an ogre... problem.
:'''Puss in Boots''':(Proudly) You are told correct. ''[scoffs]'' But for this, I charge a great deal of money.
:'''Harold''': Would this be enough? ''[places a bag of coins on the table]''
:''[Puss in Boots stands up and raises his sword to slice off the string, causing gold coins to spill out of the sack.]''
:'''Puss in Boots''': Hmm. You have engaged my valuable services. ''[grins]'' Your Majesty. Just tell me: Where I can find this ogre?

----
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[is an orange cat wearing black hat and cape]'' Ha-ha. Fear me, if you dare. ''[hisses]''
:'''Shrek''': Oh, look, a little cat.
:'''Donkey''': ''[sees the sword in Puss' paws]'' Look out, Shrek! He got a piece!
:'''Shrek''': It's a cat, Donkey. Come here little, kitty, kitty, kitty. Come on. Kitty. ''[Puss screeches and attacks Shrek and he screams]'' 
:'''Donkey''': ''[gasps in shock]'' Hold on, Shrek!
:'''Shrek''': GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! OH, GOD!
:'''Donkey''': Shrek, hold still! ''[kicks the Shrek's bottom and moans]'' Did I miss?
:'''Shrek''': ''[painfully]'' No, you got him.
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[after he attacks Shrek]'' Now ye ogre! Pray for mercy from... ''[slashes &quot;P&quot; on the tree]'' Puss... in Boots!
:'''Shrek''': ''[groans]'' I'll kill that cat!
:'''Donkey''': No!
:'''Puss in Boots''': Ah-ha-ha-ha! ''[drops the sword, then starts heaves for a second, confusing Shrek and Donkey; spits out the hairball and coughs]'' Phew. ''[chuckles]'' Hairball.
:'''Donkey''': ''[disgusted]'' Oh, that is nasty!
:'''Shrek''': ''[picks up Puss by the back of the neck]'' What do you reckon we should do with him?
:'''Donkey''': I say we take the sword and neuter him right here; Give him the Bob Barker treatment!
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[frightened]'' Oh, no! Por favor! Please! I implore you! It was nothing personal, Señor! I was doing it only for my family. My mother, she is sick. And my father lives off the garbage! The king offered me much in gold and I have a litter of brothers--
:'''Shrek''': ''[covers Puss' mouth with his finger]'' Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Fiona's father paid you to do this?
:'''Puss in Boots''': The rich king? Sí. ''[Shrek drops him to the ground, who screeches]''
:'''Shrek''': ''[sighs]'' Well, so much for Dad's royal blessing.
:'''Donkey''': Oh, come on, Shrek, don't feel bad. Almost everybody that meets you wants to kill you.
:'''Shrek''': ''[sits on the rock]'' Gee, thanks. ''[looks down at the river reflection and sighs]'' Maybe Fiona would have been better off if I were some sort of Prince Charming.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Sí, that's what the king said. ''[Donkey glares angrily]'' Oh, uh...sorry. I thought that question was directed at me.
:'''Donkey''': ''[walks over to Shrek]'' Shrek, Fiona knows you'd do anything for her.
:'''Shrek''': Well, it's not like I wouldn't change if I could. I just...I just wish I could make her happy. ''[pauses out; to Donkey]'' Hold the phone... ''[pulls out Fairy Godmother's business card]'' &quot;Happiness.&quot; ''[flips it over]'' &quot;A tear drop away.&quot; Donkey, think of the saddest thing that's ever happened to you!
:'''Donkey''': Oh, man, where do I begin? Well first there was the time that old farmer tried to sell me for some magic beans. I ain't never got over that. Then this fool went off and had a party and he had the guests trying to pin the tail on me. Then they got all drunk and start beatin' me with a stick going, &quot;Piñata! Piñata!&quot; What is a piñata, anyway?!
:'''Shrek''': No, Donkey, I need you to cry!
:'''Donkey''': Yeah, well don't go projecting on me! I know you're feelin' bad, but you gotta let your own- ''[Puss angrily stomps on his hoof]'' '''''OW!!!!!!!!!''''' ''[tearfully]'' You little hairy litter-licking sack of... ''[Donkey's tears shed and Shrek lets it drop onto the card, conjuring a bubble with Fairy Godmother in it]''
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[&quot;Voice Message&quot; Bubble forms after landing]'' What? Is it on? Is it on? ''[clears her throat]'' This is Fairy Godmother. I'm either away from my desk or with a client, but if you come by the office, we'll be glad to give you a personal appointment. Have a Happy Ever After! ''[the bubble pops]''
:'''Donkey''': Ohhh.
:'''Shrek''': Are you up for a little quest, Donkey?
:'''Donkey''': That's more like it! Shrek and Donkey, on another whirlwind adventure! ''[singing]'' Ain't no stoppin' us now! Whoo! We're on the move!
:'''Puss in Boots''': Stop, ogre! ''[bows to Shrek]'' I have misjudged you.
:'''Shrek''': Join the club. We've got jackets.
:'''Puss in Boots''': On my honor, I am obliged to accompany you until I have saved your life as you have spared me mine.
:'''Donkey''': I'm sorry, the position of annoying talking animal has already been taken. Let's go, Shrek! ''[sees Shrek walking to Puss]'' Shrek? ''[slightly pauses; Shrek looks down at Puss, who gives him a cute, helpless look; Shrek smiles]'' Shrek!
:'''Shrek''': Aw, come on, Donkey. Look at him; in his wee little boots. You know, how many cats can wear boots? Honestly. Aw, let's keep him!
:'''Donkey''': Say what?! ''[Puss purrs and Shrek marvels at his cuteness; groans in frustration]''
:'''Shrek''': Aw, listen. He's purring!
:'''Donkey''': Oh, so now it's cute!
:'''Shrek''': Aw, come on, Donkey. Lighten up.
:'''Donkey''': Lighten up?! Oh, I should lighten up?! Look who's telling who to lighten up!

----
:''[Shrek, Donkey, and Puss arrive at the Fairy Godmother's potion factory]''
:'''Shrek''': Hi. I'm here to see...
:'''Jerome''': The Fairy Godmother. I'm sorry, she is not in.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[from the gramophone intercom]'' Jerome! Coffee and a monte Christo, now.
:'''Jerome''': ''[sighs]'' Yes, Fairy Godmother. Right away. ''[to Shrek]'' Look, she's not seeing any client today, okay?
:'''Shrek''': That's okay, buddy. We're from the union.
:'''Jerome''': The union?
:'''Shrek''': We represent the workers in all magical industries both evil and benign.
:'''Jerome''': Oh, oh, right.
:'''Shrek''': Are you feeling at all degraded or oppressed?
:'''Jerome''': Uh... ''[turns the gramophone intercom away from him]'' A little. W-We don't even have dental.
:'''Shrek''': ''[whispers to Donkey]'' They don't even have dental. ''[to Jerome]'' Okay, we're just gonna have a look around. Oh, by the way, I think it would better if the Fairy Godmother didn't know we were here. Know what I'm saying? Huh?
:'''Donkey''': Hmm?
:'''Shrek''': Huh?
:'''Donkey''': Huh? Huh?! '''''HUH?!?!'''''
:'''Shrek''': Stop it!
:'''Jerome''': Of course. Go right in.

----
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Ah, puh, puh, puh, puh, puh... &quot;Princess&quot;! ''Cinderella''. Here we are: &quot;Lived happily ever after.&quot; Oh. ''[fake chuckles]'' No ogres. Let's see. ''Snow White''. &quot;A handsome prince.&quot; Ah, no ogres. ''Sleeping Beauty''. Oh, no ogres. ''Hansel and Gretel''. No. ''Thumbelina''. No! ''The Golden Bird'', ''The Little Mermaid'', ''Pretty Woman''. No, no, no, no, NO! You see, ogres don't live happily ever after.
:'''Shrek''': [[The Rescuers Down Under|Alright, look, lady!]]
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Don't you point those dirty green sausages at me! ''[pushes his finger out of her face]''
:'''Worker''': Your Monte Christo and coffee. Oh! Sorry.
:'''Shrek''': Ah, that's okay. We were just leaving. Very sorry to have wasted your time, Miss Godmother.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Just... go.
:'''Shrek''': Come on, guys. ''[leaves]''

----
:'''Donkey''': Oh, yeah, you're right. I'm sure nice BM is the perfect solution for marital problems!
:'''Puss in Boots''': Elfa Seltzer.
:'''Shrek''': Uh-uh.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Hex Lax. 
:'''Shrek''': No. Try &quot;handsome&quot;.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Sorry, no handsome. ''[finds a blue potion bottle labeled; &quot;Happily Ever After&quot; in the restricted shelf]'' Hey, how about Happily Ever After?
:'''Shrek''': Well, what does it do? 
:'''Puss in Boots''': It says &quot;Beauty Divine&quot;.
:'''Donkey''': In some creatures, donkeys are revered as the wisest of all creatures. Especially us talking ones.
:'''Shrek''': Donkey! Then we'll have to. We got company. 
:'''Donkey''': Will you get on with this.
:'''Shrek''': Hurry! ''[Puss pulls the blue potion, but drops it]'' Nice catch, Donkey.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Finally! A good use for your mouth. ''[More colors of potions drop, the siren sounds, and the door begins to close.]''
:'''Shrek''': Come on!

----
:'''Prince Charming''': What?! Where is he, mum? ''[raises his sword due to the incident of Fairy Godmother's potion factory]'' I shall rend their heads from their shoulders! I will smite them where he stabs. He will rue the very day HE STOLE MY KINGDOM FROM ME!

----
:''[After escaping Fairy Godmother's potion factory]''
:'''Shrek''': ''[reading the potion bottle]'' &quot;Happily Ever After Potion. Maximum strength. &quot;For you and your true love. If one of you drinks this, you both will be fine. Happiness, comfort and beauty divine.&quot;
:'''Donkey''': ''[confused]'' You both will be fine?
:'''Shrek''': I guess it means it'll affect Fiona too. ''[opens the potion bottle]''
:'''Donkey''': Hey, man, this don't feel right. My donkey senses are tingling all over. So why don't you just drop that jug o' voodoo, and let's get out of here.
:'''Shrek''': It says, &quot;beauty divine&quot;. How bad can it be? ''[sniffs the potion and sneezes]''
:'''Donkey''': A-ha! See, You're allergic to that stuff. You'll have a reaction. And if you think that I'll be smearing Vapor Rub all over your chest, think again!
:'''Puss in Boots''': Boss, just in case there is something wrong with the potion... allow me to take the first sip. It would be an honor to lay my life on the line for you.
:'''Donkey''': Oh, no, no. I don't think so. If there'll be any animal testing, I'll do it. That’s the best friend's job. Now give me that bottle. ''[snatches the potion bottle from Shrek's hands with his mouth and starts drinking it, but Shrek snatches it back from Donkey]''
:'''Shrek''': How do you feel?
:'''Donkey''': I don't ''feel'' any different. Do I look any different?
:'''Puss in Boots''': You still look like an ass to me.
:'''Shrek''': Maybe it doesn't work on donkeys. Well, here's to us, Fiona.
:'''Donkey''': Shrek? You drink that, there's no going back.
:'''Shrek''': I know.
:'''Donkey''': No more wallowing in the mud?
:'''Shrek''': I know.
:'''Donkey''': No more itchy butt crack?
:'''Shrek''': I know!
:'''Donkey''': But you love being an ogre!
:'''Shrek''': ''I know!'' ''[sighs]'' But I love Fiona more. ''[starts chugging the potion]''
:'''Donkey''': Shrek, no! Wait! ''[Shrek swallows the potion, then feels his stomach gurglin'. Donkey and Puss hides behind the rock, then Shrek farts]'' Got to be... Shrek, I think you grabbed the &quot;Farty Ever After&quot; potion.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Maybe it's a dud.
:'''Shrek''': Or maybe Fiona and I were never meant to be.
:''[Dark storm clouds appear above Shrek, Donkey and Puss.]''
:'''Donkey''': Uh-oh. What did I tell you? I feel something coming on. I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to die! ''[rain starts pouring, soaking the trio and getting them wet]'' Oh, sweet sister, mother of mercy! '''I'm melting!''' '''''I'M MELTING!!'''''
:'''Shrek''': It's just the rain, Donkey.
:''[Donkey chuckles as they head to a barn for some shelter. The blue ooze from Shrek's sneeze reaction on the mushroom transforms into a flower rose.]''

----
:''[After Shrek, Donkey and Puss arrived at the barn for shelter for the night]''
:'''Donkey''': Shrek, don't worry. Things seem bad because it's dark and rainy and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you. ''[Puss hisses at him]'' It'll be better in the morning. You'll see. ''[sings, then gets dizzy]'' The sun'll come out... Tomorrow... Bet your bottom...
:'''Shrek''': Bet my bottom?
:'''Donkey''': I'm comin', Elizabeth! ''[faints]''
:'''Shrek''': Donkey? A-Are you all right?
:'''Puss in Boots''': Hey, boss. Let's shave him.
:'''Shrek''': ''[gets dizzy]'' D-Donkey...? ''[groans and faints and land on Puss’ tail as he yowls off-screen]''

----
:''[Later this morning, the Jill and maidens woke up]''
:'''Jill''': Good morning, sleepyhead.
:'''Maidans''': Good morning! We lover your kitty.
:'''Shrek''': Oh, my head.

----
:''[Fiona looks at the reflection, realizing she is a human again, and screams.]''
:'''Shrek''': Fiona!
:'''Fiona''': Shrek?

----
:''[the Fairy Godmother raises her wand and doors close, the Chest of Drawers blocks Shrek's way]''
:'''Talking Chest Drawer''': You wanna dance, pretty boy?

----
:'''Doris''': There you go, boys.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Just leave the bottle, Doris.
:'''Doris''': Hey, why the long face? 
:'''Shrek''': It was all just a stupid mistake. I never should have rescued her from that tower in the first place.
:'''Puss in Boots''': I hate Mondays.
:'''Donkey''': I can't believe you're just gonna walk away from the best thing that happened to you.
:'''Shrek''': What choice do I have? She loves that pretty boy, Prince Charming.
:'''Donkey''': Aw, come on, Shrek. Is he really that good-looking?
:'''Doris''': Are you kidding? He's gorgeous! He has a face that looks like it was carved by angels.
:'''Puss in Boots''': Oh, he sounds dreamy.
:'''Shrek''': You know, shockingly, this isn't making me feel any better. ''[sighs]'' Look, guys, it's for the best. Mom and Dad approve, and Fiona gets the man she's always dreamed of. Everybody wins.
:'''Donkey''': Except you. I don't get it, Shrek. You love Fiona.
:'''Shrek''': Aye. And that's why I have to let her go.
:'''Harold''': Um, excuse me. Is she here?
:'''Doris''': She's, uh, in the back.
:'''Harold''': Oh, hello again!

----
:'''Harold''': Fairy Godmother. Charming.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Ugh, you'd better have a good reason for dragging us down here, Harold.
:'''Harold''': Well, I'm afraid Fiona isn't really... warming up to Prince Charming.
:'''Prince Charming''': Um, FYI, not my fault.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': No, no, of course it's not, dear.
:'''Prince Charming''': I mean, how charming can I be when I have to pretend that I'm that dreadful ogre?
:'''Harold''': No, no, it's nobody's fault. Perhaps it's best if we just call the whole thing off, okay?
:'''Fairy Godmother and Prince Charming''': ''[in unison; shocked]'' What?!
:'''Harold''': I mean, you can't force someone to fall in love!
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Oh, I beg to differ. I do it all the time. ''[pulls out the Love Potion 9 vial and hands it to Harold, and he takes it]'' Have Fiona drink this and she'll fall in love with the first man she kisses, which will be Charming.
:'''Harold''': Umm, no.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': What did you say?
:'''Harold''':  ''[stutters]'' I...I...I can't. I...I won't do it.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Oh, yes, you will. If you remember, I helped you with your happily ever after. And I can '''''take''''' it away just as easily. ''[sticks her wand in his face]'' Is that what you want? Is it?
:'''Harold''': No.
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[puts down her wand]'' Good boy. Now, we have to go. I need to do Charming's hair before the ball. He's hopeless. Y'know he's all high in the front, he can never get to the back. You always need someone to do the back of your hair.
:'''Prince Charming''': Oh. Thank you, mother.
:'''Donkey''': ''[from outside the window; shocked]'' MOTHER?! ''[Fairy Godmother, Charming and Harold turn their heads fast to see Shrek, Donkey and Puss outside the window, hearing everything]''
:'''Shrek''': Um, Mary! A talking horse!
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[enraged]'' The ogre! ''[Shrek, Donkey, and Puss ride away from the Poison Apple; flies after them, telling the knights to get them] '''STOP THEM! THEIVES! BANDITS! STOP THEM!!!'''''

----
:'''Harold''': Darling? Ah, I thought I might find you here. How about a nice hot cup of tea before the ball?
:'''Fiona''': I'm not going.
:'''Harold''': But the whole kingdom’s turned out to celebrate your marriage.
:'''Fiona''': There's just one problem: That’s not my husband.''[sees Prince Charming]'' I mean, look at him!
:'''Harold''': Yes, he is a bit different, but people change for the ones they love you’d be surprised how much I change for your mother change.
:'''Fiona''': &quot;Change&quot;? ''[about Prince Charming]'' He's completely lost his mind.
:'''Harold''': Honey, why not come down to the ball and give him another chance? I mean, you might find you like this new Shrek.
:'''Fiona''': But it's the ''old'' one I fell in love with, dad!
:'''Harold''': Uh, honey, that’s mine. Decaf. Otherwise, I'm up all night.
:'''Fiona''': Thanks.

----
:'''Donkey''': ''[screaming]'' I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE! YOU CAN'T LOCK US LIKE THIS! LET ME GO! WHAT ABOUT MY MIRANDA RIGHTS?! You're supposed to say, &quot;You have the right to remain silent.&quot; '''*NOBODY SAID I HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT!!!*'''
:'''Shrek''': Donkey, you ''have'' the right to remain silent. What you lack is the capacity.
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[camera shows just him]'' I must hold on before I, too, go totally mad.
:'''Pinocchio''': Shrek? Donkey?
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[looks up to see fairy tale creatures above him]'' Too late.
:'''Shrek''': Gingy, Pinocchio, get us out of here!

----
:'''Shrek''': Quick, tell a lie!
:'''Pinocchio''': What should I say?
:'''Gingy''': Anything, but quick!
:'''Donkey''': Say something crazy, like, &quot;I'm wearing ladies underwear!&quot;
:'''Pinocchio''': I'm wearing ladies underwear.
:''[But nothing happens; he is telling the truth]''
:'''Shrek''': Are you?
:'''Pinocchio''': I most certainly am not! ''[his nose extends]''
:'''Mini Donkey''': It looks like you most certainly am are!
:'''Pinocchio''': I am not! ''[his nose extends more]''
:'''Puss''': What kind?
:'''Gingy''': It's a thong! ''[pulls at his pink thong and lets it slap back]''
:'''Pinocchio''': Ow! They're briefs!
:'''Gingy''': ''[takes the key and runs across Pinocchio's nose as it continues to extend with each denial]'' Are not!
:'''Pinocchio''': Are too!
:'''Gingy''' Are not!
:'''Pinocchio''': Are too!
:'''Gingy''': ''[reaches Shrek and uses the key to free Shrek, Donkey, and Puss]'' Alright, here we go. Hang tight.
:''[Shrek lands his feet on the cell floor, followed by Puss.]''
:'''Donkey''': Wait, wait, wait! Ow! Ow! Hey, hey, hey! ''[lands on his back on the cell floor]'' Ow! ''[Shrek looks at the Far Far Away palace from outside the window]''
:'''Blind Mouse''': ''[muffled; to Puss]'' Excuse me?!
:'''Shrek''': ''[hears a muffled voice]'' What? ''[sees the mouse's tail sticking out from Puss' mouth; shocked]'' Puss!
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[realizing he has Blind Mouse in his mouth]'' Hmm?
:'''Blind Mouse''': Pardon me? Would you mind letting me go?
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[spits Blind Mouse out; sheepishly]'' Sorry, boss.
:'''Shrek''': Quit messing around! We've got to stop that kiss!
:'''Donkey''': I thought you were gonna let her go.
:'''Shrek''': I was, but I can't let him do this to Fiona.
:'''Donkey''': Boom! That's what I like to hear. Look who's finally coming around!
:'''Puss in Boots''': It's impossible! We'll never get in. The castle is guarded and there is a moat and everything!
:'''Gingy''': Well, folks, it looks like we're up chocolate creek without a popsicle stick. ''[pausing; Shrek looks at him]'' What?
:'''Shrek''': Do you still know the muffin man?
:'''Gingy''': Well, sure. He's down on Drury Lane. Why?
:'''Shrek''': Because we're gonna need flour. Lots and lots of flour.
:''[Shrek and Gingy soon arrive at the bakery, where Shrek knocks on the door. The muffin man opens the door.]
:'''Muffin Man''': ''[surprised]'' Gingy!
:'''Gingy''': Fire up the ovens, Muffin Man. We've got a big order to fill!
:''[cut to the outside of the bakery, thunder clapping is seen, and deep laughter is heard.]
:'''Gingy''': [[Frankenstein (1910 film)|IT'S ALIVE!]]
----
:''[Shrek and Donkey barged into the ball to rescue Fiona.]''
:'''Shrek''': Stop! ''[to Charming]'' Hey, ''you!'' Back away from ''my'' wife!
:'''Fiona''': ''[puzzled]'' Shrek? ''[Everyone gasps]''
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''You'' couldn't just go back to ''your'' swamp and ''leave'' well enough alone!
:'''Shrek''': ''[to the three little pigs]'' NOW!

----
:'''Fairy Godmother''': Harold! You were supposed to give her the potion!
:'''Harold''': Well, I guess I gave her the wrong tea.
:'''Prince Charming''': ''[his last words]'' Mommy ''[grabs the wand from Puss and throws to Fairy Godmother]''
:'''Fiona''': Mommy?
:'''Fairy Godmother''': ''[catches her wand and growls; last and final words before her defeat]'' I told you, ogres don't live ''HAPPILY EVER '''AFTER!'''''
:'''Lillian''': Harold!
:'''Fiona''': Shrek!
:'''Harold''': ''NO!'' ''[a transformation into a frog zaps his armor. Floats way up, checking to make sure and raises her wand, then disappears, turning into an explosion burst bubbles, only leaving her wand and her broken glasses that fell on the ground]''
:'''Fiona''': Oh, Dad! ''[cries]''
:'''Pinocchio''': Is he...
:'''Gingy''': Yep. :''[a frog ribbit is heard]'' He croaked.
:'''Lillian''': Harold?
:'''Fiona''': Dad?
:'''Harold''': I'd hoped you'd never see me like this.
:'''Donkey''': Yeah, and he gave you a hard time.
:'''Shrek''': Donkey!
:'''Harold''': No, no, he's right. I'm sorry to both of you. I only wanted what was best for Fiona. But now I can see she finally has it. Shrek, Fiona, will you accept an old frog's apologies and my blessing?

----
:''[The clock strucks midnight]''
:'''Puss in Boots''': Boss! The Happily Ever After potion!
:'''Shrek''': Midnight! Fiona. Is this what you want? To be this way forever?
:'''Fiona''': What?
:'''Shrek''': Because if you kiss me now... we can stay like this.
:'''Fiona''': You'd do that? For me?
:'''Shrek''': Yes.
:'''Fiona''': I want what any princess wants. To live happily ever after... ''[Shrek starts to lean a little closer to kiss her, but she puts her hand on his mouth]'' With the ogre I married. ''[Shrek smiles]''
:'''Puss in Boots''': Whatever happens, I must not cry! You cannot make me cry! ''[starts to sob quietly]''
:''[Shrek and Fiona hold there hands and the levitate, and Donkey too. They begin to glow blue, suddenly, the blue glow turns gold, Lillian, Harold and the Fairytale Creatures watches Shrek, Fiona, Donkey break the spell. Shrek, Fiona, Donkey goes down to the ground]''
:'''Gingy''': Wow!

----
:''[last lines; post credits]''
:'''Donkey''': ''[singing]'' [[w:All by Myself|All by myself, Don't wanna be all by myself... anymore]]
:'''Puss in Boots''': ''[enters with two ladies]'' ''Amigo.'' We are off to the [[w:Kit Kat|Kit Kat]] club. Come on, join us.
:'''Donkey''': Thanks, compadre. I'm... I'm not in the mood.
:'''Puss in Boots''': We will cheer you up! Find you a nice burro! ''[a roar is heard]''
:'''Donkey''': ''[delighted]'' Hey, baby! ''[the Dragon from the [[Shrek|first film]] flies in the scene.]'' Hey, that's my girl! Yeah! All right! Baby, where you been? ''[Dragon cries]'' I’m sorry, too. I should've stayed. But Shrek had this thing he had to do. What? Say it one more time. What you talking about? Are you serious? ''[a baby dronkey flies in]''
:'''Dronkey''': Papa!
:'''Donkey''': '''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!''''' ''[One breathes fire which Donkey avoids, the baby dronkeys fly in to hug him. Donkey laughs.]'' Look at our little mutant babies! ''[the Dragon blows a pink heart-shaped smoke, the scene cuts to black.]'' I gotta get a job.

==''Far Far Away Idol''==
:'''[[Simon Cowell]]''': You're on fire, Donkey.
:'''Shrek''': No, you're really on fire!
----
:'''Simon Cowell''': Come on, get real, Pinocchio.
:'''Shrek''': I find his performance quite wooden, actually. ''[laughs]'' Wooden.
----
:'''Simon Cowell''': ''[as Fiona plants a floor trap on Prince Charming while Shrek holds the red button]'' That's the artist formally known as Prince Charming.
----
:'''Fiona''': ''[watching Gingy &amp; Tinker Bell dance and form a tune to The Archies &quot;Sugar&quot;]'' They're so sweet together.
:'''Simon Cowell''': I just knew you'd say that, Fiona. ''[groans]'' What's next, a singing donut?
----
:'''Simon Cowell''': The cat's got my tongue, and possibly my vote. ''[notices Shrek and Fiona are not in their seats]'' Ugh. Always breaking the rules!

==Cast==
* '''[[w:Mike Myers|Mike Myers]]''' — [[w:Shrek (character)|Shrek]] (speaking voice)
** '''[[w:Michael Gough|Michael Gough]]''' – [[w:Shrek (character)|Shrek]] (singing voice)
* '''[[Eddie Murphy]]''' — [[w:Donkey (Shrek)|Donkey]]
* '''[[Cameron Diaz]]''' — [[w:Princess Fiona|Princess Fiona]]
* '''[[Julie Andrews]]''' — Queen Lillian
* '''[[w:Antonio Banderas|Antonio Banderas]]''' — [[w:Puss in Boots (Shrek)|Puss in Boots]]
* '''[[John Cleese]]''' — King Harold
* '''[[Rupert Everett]]''' — Prince Charming
* '''[[w:Jennifer Saunders|Jennifer Saunders]]''' — [[w:Fairy Godmother (Shrek)|The Fairy Godmother]]
* '''[[Frank Welker]]''' — [[w:Dragon (Shrek)|Dragon]], Dronkeys
* '''[[w:Aron Warner|Aron Warner]]''' — Big Bad Wolf
* '''[[w:Cody Cameron|Cody Cameron]]''' — Pinocchio, Three Pigs
* '''[[w:Conrad Vernon|Conrad Vernon]]''' — Gingy, Muffin Man, Mongo
* '''[[w:Christopher Knights|Chris Knights]]''' — Blind Mouse
* '''[[Larry King]]''' — Doris the Ugly Stepsister
* '''[[w:Chris Miller (animator)|Chris Miller]]''' — Magic Mirror
* '''[[Joan Rivers|Joan Rivers — Herself]]'''

== See also ==
* ''[[Shrek]]'', a 2001 animated film.
* ''[[Shrek the Third|Shrek 3]]'', the 2007 third film.
* ''[[Shrek Forever After|Shrek 4]]'', the 2010 fourth film.
* ''[[Puss in Boots (2011 film)|Puss in Boots]]'', a 2011 spin-off animated film.
* ''[[Puss in Boots: The Last Wish|Puss in Boots 2: The Last Wish]]'', a 2022 sequel

==Taglines==
* In Summer 2004, They're Back for More.
* Once Upon Another Time...
* Not So Far, Far Away.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0298148|title=Shrek 2}}

{{Shrek}}
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:2004 films]]
[[Category:2004 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2004 American animated films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American sequel films]]
[[Category:Shrek]]
[[Category:Screenplays by Joe Stillman]]
[[Category:Animated films about royalty]]
[[Category:Animated films set in castles]]
[[Category:Animated films set in the Middle Ages]]
[[Category:Animated films about dragons]]
[[Category:Animated films about cats]]
[[Category:Films about princes]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:Fairy films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Conrad Vernon]]
[[Category:2000s English-language films]]
[[Category:Films about potions]]</text>
      <sha1>oi6qajfs1mpdy3docrvp15uxmtrusjq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Yu-Gi-Oh!</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>5811</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965063</id>
      <parentid>3940535</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:47:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965063</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5198" sha1="7vtbgjffdv4zahuluczbmpvyv2nallo" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''Seasons''': [[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 1)|1]] / [[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 2)|2]] / [[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 3)|3 Enter the Shadow Realm]] / [[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 4)|4 Waking the Dragons]] / [[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 5)|5 Grand Championship, Capsule Monsters and Dawn of the Duel]] | '''Movies''': [[Yu-Gi-Oh! The Movie: Pyramid of Light]] / [[Yu-Gi-Oh!: The Dark Side of Dimensions|The Dark Side of Dimensions]] / [[Yu-Gi-Oh!: Bonds Beyond Time|Bonds Beyond Time]] | [[Yu-Gi-Oh!|Main]]
----------------
'''''[[w:Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]]''''' is a Japanese manga series about gaming written and illustrated by [[Kazuki Takahashi]]. Two anime adaptations were produced; one by Toei Animation, which aired from April 4, 1998 to October 10, 1998, and another produced by NAS and TV Tokyo animated by Studio Gallop titled ''Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters'', which aired between April 2000 and September 2004.

==Seasons (2000–06)==
* '''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 1)|Season 1]]'''
* '''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 2)|Season 2]]'''
* '''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 3)|Season 3: Enter the Shadow Realm]]''' 
* '''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 4)|Season 4: Waking the Dragons]]'''
* '''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! (season 5)|Season 5: Grand Championship and Dawn of the Duel]]'''

==Movies==
*'''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! (1999 film)|Yu-Gi-Oh!]]''' (1999)
*'''[[Yu-Gi-Oh! The Movie: Pyramid of Light|The Movie: Pyramid of Light]]''' (2004)
*'''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!: Bonds Beyond Time|Bonds Beyond Time]]''' (2010)
*'''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!: The Dark Side of Dimensions|The Dark Side of Dimensions]]''' (2016)

==''{{PAGENAME}}''==

* “Yu-Gi-Oh!’s” fundamental theme, aside from the triad of “friendship,” “death,” and “love,” also includes the keyword “independence.” I would like all my readers to have something–one thing–that they’ll rise above others to. &lt;br&gt; For example, even though the card game takes center stage in the story, I would hope you all make friends and form a friendly rivalry with one another. And while doing so, I hope you all find something unique to yourself–your ‘only one.’ I may present only the card game aspect during the story to everyone, but I’m glad that it could be provided as an opportunity for communication to allow everyone to meet one another and explore new possibilities. By fighting through cards, I wish you could all learn about people and build good relationships.
:* [[w:Kazuki Takahashi|Kazuki Takahashi]], [https://ygocanonshuffle.wordpress.com/2011/09/22/the-super-long-interview-with-kazuki-takahashi-sensei-part-2-translation-by-shinhoroko/ ''The Gospel of Truth''], (November 1, 2002).

==Voice cast==
===Main===
*[[w:Dan Green (voice actor)|Dan Green]] - Yugi Muto/Atem
*[[w:Wayne Grayson|Wayne Grayson]] - Katsuya Jonouchi/Joey Wheeler
*[[w:Greg Abbey|Greg Abbey]] - Hiroto Honda/Tristan Taylor
*[[w:Amy Birnbaum|Amy Birnbaum]] - Anzu Mazaki/Téa Gardner
*[[w:Marc Thompson (voice actor)|Marc Thompson]] - Duke Devlin
*[[w:Eric Stuart|Eric Stuart]] - Seto Kaiba
*[[w:Tara Sands|Tara Sands]] - Mokuba Kaiba

===Supporting===
*[[w:Ted Lewis|Ted Lewis]] as Bakura Ryou/Yami Bakura (Seasons 1, 2, 5)
*Megan Hollingshead (Seasons 1, 2, 3) and [[w:Bella Hudson|Bella Hudson]] (Season 4; cameo in Season 5) - Mai Kujaku/Mai Valentine 
* [[w:Wayne Grayson|Wayne Grayson]] - Sugoroku Mutou/Solomon Muto (Seasons 1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
*Darren Dunstan - Maximillion J. Pegasus J. Crawford  (Seasons 1, 4, 5)
*[[w:Jonathan Todd Ross|Jonathan Todd Ross]]- Marik Ishtar/Yami Marik (Seasons 2, 3, 5)
*TBA- Ishizu Ishtar/Yami Ishizu (Seasons 2, 3, 5)
*TBA- Odion Ishtar (Seasons 2, 3, 5)
*Bella Hudson- Dark Magician Girl, Mana (Seasons 3, 4, 5)
*Dan Green- Legendary Knight Timaeus (Season 4)
*Wayne Grayson- Legendary Knight Hermos (Season 4)
*Eric Stuart- Legendary Knight Critias (Season 4)
*Lisa Ortiz- Serenity K. Wheeler (Seasons 1, 2, 3; cameo in Season 5)
*Kerry Williams- Rebecca Hawkins (Seasons 1, 4, 5)
*Mike Pollock- Arthur Hawkins (Seasons 1, 4, 5)

===Recurring===
*TBA- Zigfreid Lloyd von Schroeder (Season 5; 14 Episodes)
*TBA- Leaping Leon Wilson von Schroeder (Season 5; 14 Episodes)
*TBA- Vivian Wong (Season 5; 14 Episodes)
*Carter Cathcart- Weevil Underwood (Seasons 1, 2, 4, 5)
*Sam Regal and Anthony Salerno- Rex Raptor (Seasons 1, 2, 4, 5)
*Wayne Grayson- Shadi Shin (Seasons 1, 2, 5)
*Marc Thompson- Rafael (Season 4; cameo in Season 5)
*Marc Thompson- Valon (Season 4; cameo in Season 5)
*Ted Lewis- Alister (Season 4; cameo in Season 5)
*Wayne Grayson- Dartz (Season 4; 40 Episodes)
*Andrew Rannells- Noah &quot;Kaiba&quot; Kaibaboy (Season 3; 24 Episodes)

===Movies===
*Scottie Ray as Anubis (from ''The Pyramid of Light'')
*Matthew Charles as Jaden Yuki (from ''Bonds Beyond Time'')
*Greg Abbey as Yusei Fudo ( from ''Bonds Beyond Time'')
*Laurie Hymens as Sera (from ''The Dark Side of Dimensions'')
*Tamir Cousins as Mani (from ''The Dark Side of Dimensions'')
*Daniel J. Edwards as Diva &quot;Aigami&quot; (from ''The Dark Side of Dimensions'')

== External links ==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}
{{Yu-Gi-Oh!}}
[[Category:Anime and manga series]]
[[Category:Japanese TV shows]]
[[Category:Science fiction TV shows]]
[[Category:Fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Kids' WB shows]]
[[Category:Yu-Gi-Oh!]]</text>
      <sha1>7vtbgjffdv4zahuluczbmpvyv2nallo</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Bai Juyi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>6711</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965279</id>
      <parentid>3949997</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:58:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */ fix fmt</comment>
      <origin>3965279</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10895" sha1="d9d75vtdi7dqbnyg80zy1p0fvlc3ijm" xml:space="preserve">[[File:白樂天.png|thumb|right|I only indulge myself in drinking wine and writing poetry. I am indeed indulgent, but what harm will that do?]]

'''{{W|Bai Juyi}}''' (also '''Bo Juyi''' or '''Po Chü-i'''; Chinese: 白居易; 772–846) was a renowned [[Chinese poet]].

== Quotes ==

* 琴詩酒伴皆拋我 &amp;emsp; 雪月花時最憶君
** My partners at the [[w:guqin|zither]], poetry and drinking have all left me,&lt;br&gt;the time of snow, moon and flowers is when I miss a friend the most.
*** A Poem Sent to Yin Xielü ([[wikisource:zh:寄殷協律|寄殷協律]])&lt;br&gt;English translation of Lin Tsung-cheng in King, R., Poulton, C., &amp; Endo, K. (2012) ''Sino-Japanese transculturation: from the late nineteenth century to the end of the Pacific war''
*** The phrase ''[[w:Snow, moon and flowers|&quot;Snow, moon and flowers&quot; (雪月花)]]'' derives from this verse

* 言者不知知者默&lt;br&gt;此語吾聞於老君&lt;br&gt;若道老君是知者&lt;br&gt;缘何自著五千文
** He who preaches knows not, he who knows is mute.&lt;br&gt;These are the words, I'm told, of [[Laozi]] the master of old.&lt;br&gt;But if, it be said, the master, was one who truly knew,&lt;br&gt;O why did he pen a treatise, a thousand words five-fold?
*** Translation by Andrew W.F. Wong
** Alternate translation: Whoever speaks is not wise, whoever is wise always keep silence; I hear this message from Laozi. If Laozi is a wise man, why did he himself write [[Dao De Jing]] which has five thousand words?
*** Chen, B. (2006). ''The Debate on the Yan-Yi Relation in Chinese Philosophy: Reconstruction and Comments''. Frontiers of Philosophy in China, 1(4), 539–560. http://www.jstor.org/stable/30209875:&lt;br&gt;

* I am lucky not to have such bad habits. I only indulge myself in drinking wine and writing poetry. I am indeed indulgent, but what harm will that do?
** As quoted in Wang, Y. (2015). Medieval Chinese Autobiographical Writing: The Self-Written Epitaph. The Medieval History Journal, 18(2), 305-345. https://doi.org/10.1177/0971945815602083

[[File:Ma Yuan Walking on Path in Spring (cropped).jpg|thumb|right|I set my eyes on the green mountain, and let my hair grow white.&lt;br&gt;Who knows how many years I have left to live in this world?&lt;br&gt;From now till the end of my life, there are only days of leisure.]]

* I set my eyes on the green mountain, and let my hair grow white.&lt;br&gt;Who knows how many years I have left to live in this world?&lt;br&gt;From now till the end of my life, there are only days of leisure.
** As quoted in Wang, Y. (2015). Medieval Chinese Autobiographical Writing: The Self-Written Epitaph. The Medieval History Journal, 18(2), 305-345. https://doi.org/10.1177/0971945815602083

* I lay my harp on the curved table,&lt;br /&gt;Sitting there idly, filled only with emotions.&lt;br /&gt;Why should I trouble to play?&lt;br /&gt;A breeze will come and sweep the strings.
** &quot;The Harp&quot;, in ''The White Pony: An Anthology Of Chinese Poetry'' (1949), ed. Robert Payne, p. 220

* {{lang|zh|漠漠秋雲起，稍稍夜寒生。&lt;br&gt;但覺衣裳濕，無點亦無聲。}}
** Autumn clouds, vague and obscure;&lt;br&gt;The evening, lonely and chill.&lt;br&gt;I felt the dampness on my garments,&lt;br&gt;But saw no spot, and heard no sound of rain.
*** [[wikisource:zh:微雨夜行|微雨夜行]] (&quot;Walking at Night in Fine Rain&quot;), as translated in Reginald Horace Blyth's ''Haiku: Eastern Culture'', Vol. I (Hokuseidō Shoten, 1950), p. 56; quoted in [[Alan Watts]]'s ''Nature, Man and Woman'' (1958)

=== Arthur Waley's translations ===
:&lt;small&gt;Quotes from ''Translations from the Chinese'' by [[w:Arthur Waley|Arthur Waley]]&lt;/small&gt;

* For ten years I never left my books;&lt;br /&gt;I went up ... and won unmerited praise.&lt;br /&gt;My high place I do not much prize;&lt;br /&gt;The joy of my parents will first make me proud.
** &quot;[[s:More Translations from the Chinese/After Passing the Examination|After Passing the Examination]]&quot; (A.D. 800)

[[File:九江琵琶亭白居易石像.JPG|thumb|... by virtue of what right&lt;br /&gt;Have I never once tended field or tree?&lt;br /&gt;My government-pay is three hundred tons;&lt;br /&gt;At the year's end I have still grain in hand.&lt;br /&gt;Thinking of this, secretly I grew ashamed.]]
* And ''I'' today ... by virtue of what right&lt;br /&gt;Have I never once tended field or tree?&lt;br /&gt;My government-pay is three hundred tons;&lt;br /&gt;At the year's end I have still grain in hand.&lt;br /&gt;Thinking of this, secretly I grew ashamed;&lt;br /&gt; And all day the thought lingered in my head.
** &quot;[[s:More Translations from the Chinese/Watching the Reapers|Watching the Reapers]]&quot; (A.D. 806)

* When the Seasons' changes thus confront the mind&lt;br /&gt;What comfort can the Doctrine of [[Tao]] give?&lt;br /&gt;It will teach me to watch the days and months fly&lt;br /&gt;Without grieving that Youth slips away;&lt;br /&gt;If the Fleeting World is but a long dream,&lt;br /&gt;It does not matter whether one is young or old.
** &quot;[[s:More Translations from the Chinese/At the End of Spring|At the End of Spring]]&quot; (A.D. 810)

* I was born in the Realms of Etiquette;&lt;br /&gt;In early years, unprotected and poor.&lt;br /&gt;Alone, I learnt to distinguish between Evil and Good;&lt;br /&gt;Untutored, I toiled at bitter tasks.&lt;br /&gt;The World's Law honours Learning and Fame;&lt;br /&gt;Scholars prize marriages and Caps.&lt;br /&gt;With these fetters I gyved my own hands;&lt;br /&gt;Truly I became a much-deceived man.&lt;br /&gt;At ten years old I learnt to read books;&lt;br /&gt;At fifteen, I knew how to write prose.&lt;br /&gt;At twenty I was made a Bachelor of Arts;&lt;br /&gt;At thirty I became a Censor at the Court.&lt;br /&gt;Above, the duty I owe to Prince and parents;&lt;br /&gt;Below, the ties that bind me to wife and child.&lt;br /&gt;The support of my family, the service of my country—&lt;br /&gt;For these tasks my nature is not apt.
** &quot;[[s:More Translations from the Chinese/Chu Ch'ēn Village|Chu Ch'ēn Village]]&quot; (A.D. 811)

* In the depth of the night not daring to let any one know&lt;br /&gt;I secretly took a huge stone and dashed it against my arm.&lt;br /&gt;For drawing the bow and waving the banner now wholly unfit;&lt;br /&gt;I knew henceforward I should not be sent to fight in Yün-nan.&lt;br /&gt;Bones broken and sinews wounded could not fail to hurt;&lt;br /&gt;I was ready enough to bear pain, if only I got back home.&lt;br /&gt;My arm—broken ever since; it was sixty years ago.&lt;br /&gt;One limb, although destroyed,—whole body safe!&lt;br /&gt;But even now on winter nights when the wind and rain blow&lt;br /&gt;From evening on till day's dawn I cannot sleep for pain.&lt;br /&gt;Not sleeping for pain&lt;br /&gt;Is a small thing to bear,&lt;br /&gt;Compared with the joy of being alive...
** &quot;[[s:A Hundred and Seventy Chinese Poems/The Old Man with the Broken Arm|The Old Man with the Broken Arm]]&quot; (a satire on militarism)

[[File:Bai Juyi.jpg|thumb|I remember, when I was young,&lt;br /&gt; How easily my mood changed from sad to gay.&lt;br /&gt; ... But now that age comes,&lt;br /&gt; A moment of joy is harder and harder to get.]]
* I remember, when I was young,&lt;br /&gt; How easily my mood changed from sad to gay.&lt;br /&gt; If I saw wine, no matter at what season,&lt;br /&gt; Before I drank it, my heart was already glad.&lt;br /&gt; But now that age comes,&lt;br /&gt; A moment of joy is harder and harder to get.&lt;br /&gt; And always I fear that when I am quite old&lt;br/ &gt; The strongest liquor will leave me comfortless.
** &quot;[[s:More Translations from the Chinese/The Chrysanthemums in the Eastern Garden|The Chrysanthemums in the Eastern Garden]]&quot; (A.D. 812)

* A gentle wind blows on my fishing-gear&lt;br&gt;Softly shaking my ten feet of line.&lt;br&gt;Though my body sits waiting for fish to come,&lt;br&gt;My heart has wandered to the Land of Nothingness.&lt;br&gt;Long ago [[w:Jiang Ziya|a white-headed man]]&lt;br&gt;Also fished at the same river's side;&lt;br&gt;A hooker of men, not a hooker of fish,&lt;br&gt;At seventy years, he caught [[w:King Wen of Zhou|Wen Wang]].&lt;br&gt;But I, when I come to cast my hook in the stream,&lt;br&gt;Have no thought either of fish or men.&lt;br&gt;Lacking the skill to capture either prey,&lt;br&gt;I can only bask in the autumn water's light.&lt;br&gt;When I tire of this, my fishing also stops;&lt;br&gt;I go to my home and drink my cup of wine.
** [[wikisource:Fishing in the Wei River|Fishing in the Wei River]] (渭上偶钓)

=== [[w:Chang Hen Ge (poem)|Chang hen ge (長恨歌; A Song of Unending Sorrow)]] ===
:&lt;small&gt;Translation from ''The Jade Mountain: A Chinese Anthology'' by Witter Bynner&lt;/small&gt;

*春寒賜浴華清池 &lt;br /&gt; 温泉水滑洗凝脂
** ...It was early spring. They bathed her in the Flower-Pure Pool,&lt;br /&gt;Which warmed and smoothed the creamy-tinted crystal of her skin

*可憐光彩生門戸 &lt;br /&gt; 遂令天下父母心 &lt;br /&gt; 不重生男重生女
** And, because she so illumined and glorified her clan,&lt;br /&gt;She brought to every father, every mother through the empire,&lt;br /&gt;Happiness when a girl was born rather than a boy.

*在天願作比翼鳥 &lt;br /&gt; 在地願為連理枝 &lt;br /&gt; 天長地久有時盡 &lt;br /&gt; 此恨綿綿無絶期
** ...That we wished to fly in heaven, two birds with the wings of one,&lt;br /&gt;And to grow together on the earth, two branches of one tree.&lt;/br&gt;Earth endures, heaven endures; some time both shall end,&lt;br /&gt;While this unending sorrow goes on and on for ever.
** The last four lines.

== Quotes about Bai Juyi ==

* Like the poet Po Chüyi, the Chinese scholar &quot;utilized [[Confucianism]] to order his conduct, utilized [[Buddhism]] to cleanse his mind, and then utilized history, paintings, mountains, rivers, wine, music and song to soothe his spirit.&quot;
** [[Lin Yutang]], ''The Importance of Living'' (1940), p. 411. The quoted text is cited as &quot;From Po Chüyi's composition for his own tomb inscription.&quot;

* Although there have been many wars in China, the natural outlook of the Chinese is very pacifistic. I do not know of any other country where a poet would have chosen, as Po-Chui did in one of the poems translated by [[w:Arthur Waley|Mr. Waley]], called by him ''The Old Man with the Broken Arm'', to make a hero of a recruit who maimed himself to escape military service.
** [[Bertrand Russell]], ''The Problem of China'' (1922), p. 195

* The most striking characteristic of Po Chü-i's poetry is its verbal [[simplicity]]. There is a story that he was in the habit of reading his poems to an old peasant woman and altering any expression which she could not understand. The poems of his contemporaries were mere elegant diversions which enabled the scholar to display his erudition, or the literary juggler his dexterity. ... No poet in the world can ever have enjoyed greater contemporary popularity than Po.
** [[w:Arthur Waley|Arthur Waley]], ''A Hundred and Seventy Chinese Poems'' (1919), pp. 166 and 168

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wikisource-author}}
{{commonscat}}
*[http://www.blackcatpoems.com/j/bai_juyi.html Bai Juyi: Poems] – English translations of Bai Juyi's poetry.

[[Category:8th century births]]
[[Category:840s deaths]]
[[Category:Tang dynasty poets]]
[[Category:Musicians from China]]
[[Category:Politicians from China]]
[[Category:Buddhists from China]]</text>
      <sha1>d9d75vtdi7dqbnyg80zy1p0fvlc3ijm</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Self</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>6725</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965246</id>
      <parentid>3933882</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:59:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evenmadderjon</username>
        <id>218889</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added quote from Maine de Biran</comment>
      <origin>3965246</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="21087" sha1="i44e0xsbrg015laoct914ahm4yyuyqj" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Harvey Mansfield by Gage Skidmore.jpg|thumb|The self is a simplification of the notion of soul, created to serve the purposes of the modern sciences of psychology and economics, both of which want you to be happy in a simple, straightforward way they can count. ~ [[Harvey Mansfield]]]]
In philosophy, the '''[[w:Self (philosophy)|self]]''' is the idea of a unified being which is the source of an idiosyncratic [[w:consciousness|consciousness]].
__NOTOC__
{{TOCalpha}}
== B==
* There is good evidence for a [[wiktionary:sensorimotor|sensorimotor]] self, an emotional and motivational self probably represented in the right hemisphere, a social self-system, and perhaps an appetitive self. All these self-systems ordinarily work in reasonable coordination with each other, though they can be in conflict at times.
** [[w:Bernard J. Baars|Bernard J. Baars]], &quot;Understanding Subjectivity: Global Workspace Theory and the Resurrection of the Observing Self&quot; ''Journal of Consciousness Studies'', 3, No. 3, 1996, pp. 211-16

* One way to think of 'self' is as a framework that remains largely stable across many different life situations. The evidence for 'self as stable context' comes from many sources, but especially from the effects of deep disruptions of life goals. Contextual frameworks are after all largely unconscious intentions and expectations that have been stable so long that they have faded into the background of our lives. We take them for granted, just as we take our health and limbs for granted. It is only when those assumptive entitlements are lost, even for a [[moment]], that the structure of the self seems to come into question. Losing a loved friend may be experienced as a great gap in oneself. ...It helps to take this common tragedy seriously as a basic statement about the self in human psychology.
** Bernard J. Baars,  &quot;Understanding Subjectivity: Global Workspace Theory and the Resurrection of the Observing Self&quot; ''Journal of Consciousness Studies'', 3, No. 3, 1996, pp. 211-16

* Oddly enough, in the sensorimotor area on top of the cortex there are four [[maps]] of a little upside-down person, distorted in shape, with every bit of skin and muscle represented in detail. This upside-down map is called the sensorimotor [[w:Humunculus|homunculus]], the little human. The nervous system abounds in such maps, some of which appear to serve as 'self systems', organizing and integrating vast amounts of local bits of information.
** [[w:Bernard J. Baars|Bernard J. Baars]], ibid., &quot;Understanding Subjectivity: Global Workspace Theory...&quot;

* The Arch-flatterer, with whom all the petty flatterers have intelligence, is a man’s self.
** [[Francis Bacon]]. ‘On Love’, ''Essays'' (1597-1625)

* Chercher à objectiver le moi ou à le saisir par le dehors, c'est comme si l'on voulait se mettre à la fenêtre pour le voir passer.
** Trying to objectify the myself or to grasp it from outside is like wanting to go to a window to see oneself go by.
*** [[w:Maine de Biran|Maine de Biran]], ''Œuvres, t. 10-2 : Dernière philosophie: existence et anthropologie'', édité par Bernard Baertschi (Paris, Vrin, 1989), p. 91

* The one self-knowledge worth having is to know one’s own mind.
** [[Francis Herbert Bradley]] (1846–1924), British philosopher. ''Aphorisms'', No. 8 (1930)

* Identities are not tangible anymore. If you look for an [[identity]] you find [[inequality]]. The self has been refracting.
**[[Giannina Braschi]], in the Postcolonial novel ''United States of Banana'' (2011).

==D==
* For in every action what is primarily intended by the doer, whether he acts from natural necessity or out of free will, it is the disclosure of his own image. Hence it comes about that every doer, in so far as he does, takes delight in doing; since everything that is desires its own being, and since in action the being of the doer is somehow intensified, delight necessarily follows... Thus, nothing acts unless [by acting] it makes [[wikt:patent#Adjective_2|patent]] its latent self.
** [[Dante Alighieri]], ''{{w|De Monarchia}}'' (1312-1313) Libri iii, Caput XIII, (XV.) Translation as quoted by [[Hannah Arendt]], ''The Human Condition'' (1958) [https://archive.org/details/humancondition0000aren/page/175/mode/1up p. 175.]

* ''Cogito, ergo sum.'' 
* I think, therefore I am.
** [[w:Descartes|Descartes]] ''Discours de la Méthode'', Discourse on the Method (1637)

* Identity is an illusion, a temporary state. Everyone is searching for it, but it’s only a brief reflection in a very shallow pool of time.
** [[Olivia Dresher]] (b. 1945), American poet and publisher. ‘Aphorisms by Olivia Dresher’ on, Olivia Dresher.com

* And when you think of others, far away, think of yourself&lt;br&gt;And say: I am a candle in the [[darkness]].
** [[Mahmoud Darwish]], ''Think upon others'' [https://edinburgharabicinitiative.wordpress.com/2014/02/12/mahmoud-darwish-think-upon-others/ edinburgharabicinitiative.wordpress.com], [https://www.aldiwan.net/poem9380.html aldiwan.net (Arabic)]

* Human beings are so constituted that we take for granted the fact that a direct awareness of our past selves is preserved... We take for granted the durability of the individual self. ...But ...the preservation of [[Memory|memories]] ...is as great an exercise in magic as the transfer of memories from the dead to the living. ...How the magic works ...is still a dark mystery. ...When once the technology exists to read and write memories from one mind to another, the age of mental exploration will begin in earnest. ...[W]e will look at nature directly through the eyes of the elephant, the eagle and the whale. We will... feel in our own minds the pride of the peacock and the wrath of the lion. That magic is no greater than the magic that enables me to see the rocking horse through the eyes of the child who rode it sixty years ago.
** [[Freeman Dyson]], ''[[w:Infinite in All Directions|Infinite in All Directions]]: Gifford Lectures given at Aberdeen, Scotland April-November 1985'' (1988) Ch. 17 Butterflies Again, pp. 289-291 (paperback edn, 1989).

==F==
* Everybody should fear only one person, and that person should be himself.
** [[Philip José Farmer]], ''The Magic Labyrinth'' (1980), Chapter 1

*  If there is a community of computers living in my head, there had also better be somebody who is in charge; and, by God, it had better be me.
** [[Jerry Fodor]], [http://www.lrb.co.uk/v20/n02/jerry-fodor/the-trouble-with-psychological-darwinism &quot;The Trouble with Psychological Darwinism&quot;] ''London Review of Books'', Vol. 20 No. 2, 22 January 1998, pp.11-13

==G==
* If you have no confidence in self you are twice defeated in the race of life. With confidence you have won even before you have started.
** [[Marcus Garvey]], in ''The Philosophy and Opinions of Marcus Garvey'', compiled by Amy Jacques Garvey (1923), p. 10

* Self-correction begins with self-knowledge.
** [[Baltasar Gracián]]. In maxim 69, ''The Art of Worldly Wisdom'' (1647)

==H==
* The self really is an illusion—and realizing this is the basis of spiritual life.
** [[Sam Harris]], [http://www.theminimalists.com/sam/ Interview with ''The Minimalists'' (19 August 2014)]

* The best mirror is an old friend.
** [[George Herbert]] ''Jacula Prudentum'' (1651) (17th Century English proverb)
 
* It appears to be an inborn and imperative need of all men to regard the self as a unit. However often and however grievously this illusion is shattered, it always mends again. The judge who sits over the murderer and looks into his face, and at one [[moment]] recognizes all the emotions and potentialities and possibilities of the murderer in his own soul and hears the murderer’s voice as his own, is at the next moment one and indivisible as the judge, and scuttles back into the shell of his cultivated self and does his duty and condemns the murderer to death. And if ever the suspicion of their manifold being dawns upon men of unusual powers and of unusually delicate perceptions, so that, as all genius must, they break through the illusion of the unity of the personality and perceive that the self is made up of a bundle of selves, they have only to say so and at once the majority puts them under lock and key, calls science to aid, establishes schizomania and protects humanity from the necessity of hearing the cry of truth from the lips of these unfortunate persons.
** [[Herman Hesse]], ''Steppenwolf'', B. Creighton, trans., (New York: 1990), pp. 58-59

* If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, what am I? And if not now — when? 
** [[Hillel]], from Leo Rosten's ''Treasury of Jewish Quotations'' (1972,) p. 459

* How much easier is self-sacrifice than self-realization!
** [[Eric Hoffer]], &quot;Thoughts of Eric Hoffer, Including: 'Absolute Faith Corrupts Absolutely'&quot;; in ''The New York Times Magazine'' (April 25, 1971), p. 60

==J==
* In its widest possible sense, however, a man's Self is the sum total of all that he can call his, not only his body and his psychic powers, but his clothes and his house, his wife and children, his ancestors and friends, his reputation and works, his lands and horses, and yacht and bank-account. All these things give him the same emotions. If they wax and prosper, he feels triumphant; if they dwindle and die away, he feels cast down.
** [[William James]], ''The Principles of Psychology'' (1890)

*Your identity changes with how you perceive reality. 
**[[Vithu Jeyaloganathan]], as quoted in [http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2009-07-11/edit-page/28191161_1_identity-sacred-space-infosys ''SACRED SPACE: Your Identity'' (July 11, 2009)], [[w:The Times of India|''The Times of India'']], [http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/home/opinion/edit-page/Who-are-you/articleshow/10056545.cms? ''SACRED SPACE: Who are you?'' (September 21, 2011)].
** Variant: “The identity of one changes with how one perceives reality.” As quoted in [http://books.google.com/books?id=aCPO4RsS4e4C&amp;pg=PT98&amp;lpg=PT98&amp;dq=%22Vithu+Jeyaloganathan%22&amp;source=bl&amp;ots=RoJ5IRWLgi&amp;sig=1120_ffDwx5s4Xag-eYYIUvZP2o&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ei=EQ6tUYbwH6-ViQeh_YCQAw&amp;redir_esc=y ''Between Dog and Wolf: Understanding the Connection and the Confusion''] (2012) by Jessica Addams and Andrew Miller, Dogwise Publishing.

* '''Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.'''
** [[Carl Jung]], ''Memories, Dreams, Reflections'' (1963)

==K==
*“A human being is spirit. But what is spirit? Spirit is the self. But what is the self? The self is a relation that relates itself to itself or is the relation’s relating itself to itself in the relation.”
**[[Soren Kierkegaard]]. (1813-1855) &quot;Sickness Unto Death&quot;.

*'''Rose''': Does something like a &quot;self&quot; exist inside of you?
:'''Colonel''': That which you call &quot;self&quot; serves as nothing more than a mask to cover your own being.
:'''Rose''': In this era of ready-made 'truths', &quot;self&quot; is just something used to preserve those positive emotions that you occasionally feel...
:'''Colonel''': Another possibility is that &quot;self&quot; is a concept you conveniently borrowed under the logic that it would endow you with some sense of strength...
:* ''[[w:Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty|Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty]]'' written by Hideo Kojima and Tomokazu Fukushima

==L==
* Self: that invisible chain that snaps tight whenever we stray.
** [[Yahia Lababidi]] (b. 1973), Egyptian-Lebanese essayist and poet. ''Signposts to Elsewhere'' (2008)

*'''Knowing others is wisdom.'''&lt;br&gt;'''Knowing oneself is enlightenment'''.
** [[Laozi]], ''Tao Te Ching'', Ch. 33, as interpreted by Stephen Mitchell (1992)

* '''At the highest level of [[w:satori|satori]] from which people return, the point of consciousness becomes a surface or a solid which extends throughout the whole known universe.''' This used to be called fusion with the Universal Mind or [[God]]. In more modern terms you have done a mathematical transformation in which your centre of consciousness has ceased to be a travelling point and has become a surface or solid of consciousness... '''It was in this state that I experienced &quot;myself&quot; as melded and intertwined with hundreds of billions of other beings in a thin sheet of consciousness that was distributed around the galaxy. A &quot;membrane&quot;.'''
** [[John C. Lilly]] ''Tanks for the Memories : Floatation Tank Talks'' (1995)
*No Self, No [[Fear]].
**[[w:Joseph Ledoux|Joseph Ledoux]], ''The Deep History of Ourselves'', [https://twitter.com/theamygdaloid/status/1166538542224420864?lang=en ref].
[[File:Rorschach like Inkblot.svg|thumb|[[All]] self, the [[phenomenon]] of self, is perhaps one field, one consciousness – perhaps there is only one ‘I’, perhaps our [[brains]], our selves, our entire [[identity]] is little more than a label on a waveband. We are only us when we are here. At this particular [[moment]] in space and time, this particular locus, the overall awareness of the entire continuum happens to believe it is Alan Moore. ~ [[Alan Moore]] ]] 

==M==
* The self is a simplification of the notion of soul, created to serve the purposes of the modern sciences of psychology and economics, both of which want you to be happy in a simple, straightforward way they can count.
**[[Harvey Mansfield]], “How to Understand Politics: What the Humanities Can Say to Science”

*[[Music]] is [[reflection]] of self, we just explain it, and then we get our checks in the mail.
**[[Eminem|Marshall Bruce Mathers III]], &quot;Sing For the Moment&quot;, ''The Eminem Show'' (2002)

* Self-awareness is a complex, but carefully constructed illusion: we rightly place high value on the work of those mental agencies that appear able to reflect on the behavior of other agencies—especially our linguistic and ego-structure mechanisms.
** [[Marvin Minsky]], [http://csjarchive.cogsci.rpi.edu/1980v04/i02/p0117p0133/MAIN.PDF &quot;K-Linesː A Theory of Memory&quot;] ''Cognitive Science'' 4, pp.117-133 (1980)

* One's present personality cannot share all the thoughts of one's older personalities—and yet it has some sense that they exist. This is one reason why we feel that we possess an inner Self—a sort of ever-present person-friend, inside the mind, whom we can always ask for help.
** Marvin Minsky, ''The Society Of Mind'' (1986)

* Should one think of a city as having a Self?
** [[Marvin Minsky]], ''The Emotion Machine'' (2006)

* '''It strikes me that self, not just my self, but [[all]] self, the [[phenomenon]] of self, is perhaps one field, one consciousness – perhaps there is only one ‘I’, perhaps our [[brains]], our selves, our entire [[identity]] is little more than a label on a waveband. We are only us when we are here.''' At this particular [[moment]] in space and time, this particular locus, the overall awareness of the entire continuum happens to believe it is Alan Moore. Over there – ''[he points to another table in the pizza restaurant]'' – it happens to believe it is something else. &lt;br&gt; I get the sense that if you can pull back from this particular locus, this web-site if you like, then you could be the whole net. All of us could be. That '''there is only one [[awareness]] here, that is trying out different [[patterns]]. We are going to have to come to some resolution about a lot of things in the next twenty years time, our notions of [[time]], [[space]], identity.'''
** [[Alan Moore]], in &quot;Alan Moore Interview&quot; by Matthew De Abaitua (1998), later published in ''Alan Moore: Conversations'' (2011) edited by Eric L. Berlatsky

* Self is the medium thro' which Judgment's ray&lt;br&gt;Can seldom pass without being turned astray.
** [[Thomas Moore]], &quot;The Sceptic: A Philosophical Satire&quot; (1809)
[[File:Suman_Pokhrel_(45355201921).jpg|thumb|I want to love the self that you say is you. &lt;br/&gt; ~ [[Suman Pokhrel]]]]
[[File:SecularHumanismLogo3DPrideRainbowColors.png|thumb|The [[key]] to self-generated [[happiness]] (the only reliable kind) is the refusal to take [[oneself]] too seriously. ~ [[Tom Robbins]] ]] 
[[File:Retrato Cobbe de William Shakespeare (atribuido).jpg|thumb|'''This above all: to thine own self be true''', And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. &lt;br/&gt; ~ [[William Shakespeare]]]]
[[File:SheSaid 2023 postcards Sanu Shama.jpg|thumb|Whether you become a daughter, sister, lover, partner, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law, mother, or anything else with complete honesty, the satisfaction you'll find in becoming yourself cannot be found in becoming any of these relative beings. &lt;br/&gt; ~ [[Sanu Sharma]]]]
==N==
* The self is tempted to hide its desire to dominate the world behind its pretended devotion to the world. All mature moral conduct is therefore infected with an element of dishonesty and insincerity. The lie is always intimately related to the sin of egotism.
** [[Reinhold Niebuhr]], ''Beyond Tragedy'' (New York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1937), p. 139

* '''We are unknown to ourselves, we knowers''': and with good reason. We have never looked for ourselves — so how are we ever supposed to ''find'' ourselves? … We remain strange to ourselves out of necessity, we do not understand ourselves, we ''must'' confusedly mistake who we are, the motto, 'everyone is furthest from himself' applies to us for ever, - we are not 'knowers' when it comes to ourselves…
** [[Friedrich Nietzsche]], ''On the Genealogy of Morality'', Preface

==O==
* Of course, &quot;O'Blivion&quot; was not the name I was born with. That's my television name. Soon, all of us will have special names — names designed to cause the cathode ray tube to resonate.
** Professor Brian O'Blivion, in ''[[Videodrome]]'', a 1983 film directed by [[w:David Cronenberg|David Cronenberg]]

* Nosce te ipsum.
** [[w:Know thyself|Know thyself]].
** [[w:Delphic maxims|Delphic maxim]] originating in Luxor Egypt inscribed in the pronaos (forecourt) of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi as quoted by [[Pausanias]], ''Description of Greece'', 10.24.1.

==P==

* I want to love the self that you say is you.  
** [[Suman Pokhrel]], ''My Search of You''

* May I not so much be lost as would have &lt;br&gt;No time to look at myself &lt;br&gt;Ever.
** [[Suman Pokhrel]], ''Entanglements'' 

* I am tipsy after my&lt;br&gt;own feelings &lt;br&gt;themselves have become wine.&lt;br&gt;I forget myself, world and all.
** [[Suman Pokhrel]], ''The Tajmahal and my Love''

==R==

* '''The [[key]] to self-generated [[happiness]] (the only reliable kind) is the refusal to take oneself too seriously.'''
** [[Tom Robbins]], in [http://www.hightimes.com/read/green-man-tom-robbins &quot;The Green Man : Tom Robbins&quot; interviewed by Gregory Daurer, in ''High Times'' (12 June 2002)]

==S==

* This above all: '''to thine own self be true''',&lt;br&gt;And it must follow, as the night the day,&lt;br&gt;Thou canst not then be false to any man.
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[Hamlet]]'' (c. 1600-1602), act I, scene iii, lines 78–80. Polonius is speaking to Laertes.

* Whether you become a daughter, sister, lover, partner, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law, mother, or anything else with complete honesty, the satisfaction you'll find in becoming yourself cannot be found in becoming any of these relative beings  
** [[Sanu Sharma]], quoted by Goodreads

* I hope not to encounter such a person again on my path who is interested in everything about me except my true self.
** [[Sanu Sharma]], ''Ma'' 

* People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates.
** [[Thomas Szasz]] (b. 1920), Hungarian-American psychiatrist, writer and academic. ''The Second Sin'' (1974)

==T==

* You want to be yourself, idiosyncratic; the collective (school, rules, jobs, technology) wants you generic to the point of castration.
** [[Nassim Nicholas Taleb]], ''The Bed of Procrustes: Philosophical and Practical Aphorisms'' (2010) The Universal and the Particular, p. 54.

* Human nature is so constituted that all see and judge better in the affairs of other people than in their own.
** [[Terence]], ''The Self-Tormentor'' (163 BC), III. i. 503.

==V==
* What we do belongs to what we are; and what we are is what becomes of us.
** [[Henry Van Dyke]], ''Ships and Havens'' (1898), chapter 2, p. 10.

* Self is the only prison that can ever bind the soul.
** Henry Van Dyke, ''The Prison and the Angel''

==W==

* To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
** [[Oscar Wilde]], 'Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young', (1894)

* Self-image is the beginning and ending of living, I think.
** [[w:Henry Winkler|Henry Winkler]] (b.1945), American actor, producer and director. Stated in his appearance on, The One Show, BBC1 (UK) television talk show, 15th May 2009.

==See also==
*[[Awareness]]
*[[Consciousness]]
*[[Ego]]
*[[Egotism]]
*[[Higher self]]
*[[Identity]]
*[[Kenosis]]
*[[Meditation]]
*[[Selfishness]]
*[[Self-actualization]]
*[[Self-awareness]]
*[[Self-love]]
*[[Self-realization]]
*[[Soul]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wiktionary|self}}

[[Category:Themes]]
[[Category:Psychology]]</text>
      <sha1>i44e0xsbrg015laoct914ahm4yyuyqj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Cow and Chicken</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>7436</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965059</id>
      <parentid>3963218</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:34:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Voice cast */ Removed unconstructive padding and fake info (Brendan Fraser wasn't the voice of Boneless Chicken)</comment>
      <origin>3965059</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="21756" sha1="9w9do1ogt6jvx35cxenhhn8yg7qqmc2" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Cow and Chicken|Cow and Chicken]]''''' is an American [[w:cartoon series|animated]] [[w:television comedy|comedy]] television series created by [[w:David Feiss|David Feiss]] for [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] and the third of the network's [[w:Cartoon Cartoons|Cartoon Cartoons]]. It follows the [[w:surreal humor|surreal]] adventures of two [[w:funny animal|funny animal]] siblings, Cow and Chicken. They are often antagonized by Red Guy, a [[w:Devil|devil]] who poses as various aliases to scam them.

==Theme song==
:'''Chicken''': Mama had a chicken!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Cow''': Mama had a cow!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Cow &amp; Chicken''': ''[in unison]'' Dad was proud, he didn't care how!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Theme song plays'''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Cow''': Cow!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Theme song plays more'''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Chicken''': Chicken!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Theme song plays more'''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Cow &amp; Chicken''': Cow and Chicken!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Theme song plays more'''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy starts laughing and flashes his butt a little'''

==Season 1==
===&quot;Field Trip to Folsom Prison Blues / Girls' Bathroom&quot;===
:'''Cow''': [''gasps''] Chicken, that is a good way to lose a beak!
:'''Chicken''': Ah, shut up, Cow! Mind your own beeswax! [''gets hit with sign''] What?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Chicken''': [''pretending to be an inmate and slyly pantsing the warden''] Jailbreak!

:'''Guard''': ''[panicking]'' Sound the alarm! ''[The guard falls down and the inmates laugh at him. He is then insulted and grabs Chicken pretending to be Red.] Lockdown!''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Chicken''': Eat this, you filthy screw.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Inmate''': Way to go, Red.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Chicken''': [To Red Guy as the Warden] I gotta be home by 8:00 or I'm in big trouble! Anyhow, Mom is making pork butts and taters. She only makes it on Tuesdays; it's my favorite!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Dad''': Chicken, the warden of Folsom Prison just called.
:'''Chicken''': I know what he said; I did time at the big house 'cause I pantsed the guard!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': [''as the Warden''] LADIES!!! ...and gentlemen. A terrible injustice has been done here. Red doesn't belong here - he's innocent! He wants to go home with Mom and Dad, AND EAT PORK BUTTS AND TATERS! Now, let's all join hands AND SAY WE'RE SORRY!!!
:'''Inmates''': Sorry Red!
:'''Red Guy''': Now, someone has to pay for Red's injustice... TEN YEARS IN SOLITARY CONFINEMENT FOR EVERYBODY!!! Without a toilet... [''He pulls a rope, opening the floor of the yard and dropping Chicken and the inmates down a pit'']

===&quot;Supermodel Cow / Part Time Job&quot;===
:'''Cow''': That's it! I'll get a part-time job at the milk farm. I'll make money to buy Crabs the Warthog!
:'''Chicken''': You think they want your milk? It says the finest cows on Earth, not Mars!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Dr. Chunks''': WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU, MAN?! CAN'T YOU READ?! &quot;NO CHICKEN MILK!!&quot;
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Chicken Chorus''': Itttttt's... easy-pickin', finger-lickin', chicken on a stick!
:'''Red Guy''': With the Rear Admiral, you rarely get sick! Oh-ho!
:'''Chicken Chorus''': Nobody flips a boid...
:'''Red Guy''': Like Rear Admiral Floyd!
:'''Chicken Chorus''': It's finger-lickin'!
:'''Chicken Chorus''': Nobody flips a boid...
:'''Red Guy''': Like Rear Admiral Floyd!!!
:'''Chicken Chorus''': CHICKEN!!!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Chicken''': Hey, Mr. Hiney! When do I get paid for this gig?
:'''Red Guy''': [''as Rear Admiral Floyd''] Oh, you won't need any money where you're going, little fella...
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Alive! / Who Is Supercow?&quot;===

:'''Mom''': Where would we be without you, Boneless Chicken?
:'''Boneless Chicken''': Where? Well, you'd be up a creek without a paddle or burning your bridges before they're hatched. Who can say, really?
[Mom, Dad, and Chicken laugh at Boneless' joke.]
:'''Dad''': Oh, Boneless, you always kill us!
:'''Boneless Chicken''': Ah, go on.
:'''Dad''': Will you be needing anything while we're away?
:'''Boneless Chicken''': Sure, how 'bout a spine for my limp and lifeless body? [Mom, Dad, and Chicken laugh once more as they soon head for Chicken's parent-teacher conference.]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cow''': Oh, Mom and Dad! I missed you both so much these long months of being marooned.
:'''Dad''': Sweetheart, we've only been gone half an hour for Chicken's parent-teacher conference.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': What else do I know about Supercow? WHAT ELSE?! Okay, THINK!!! [''smacks his head against the wall''] A: She speaks Spanish... TWO! She's a superhero... 
:'''Cow''': [''In Red guy's thoughts''] I'm just a widdle cow...
:'''Red Guy''': Oh! THAT'S IT!!! She's a cow!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Superheroes, are your leotards starting to stink? Is your booties getting brittle? IS YOUR CAPE KIND OF CRUDDY?! Well, come on over to Hiney Beau Dry Cleaners, where if you're a superhero, your CLEANING is free!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': [''holds up a sweetcorn-based superhero costume in disdain''] &quot;Corn-Cobb Man&quot;?! There's a lotta sick people in this town.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Confused / The Molting Fairy&quot;===
:'''Cow''': Mom always says not to go to the carnival naked.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Got any scabs?! They could be worth gold.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;The Ugliest Weenie&quot;===
:'''Red Guy''': Oh, we're flat out of time! Stay tuned after the commercial break! And maybe we'll show you the rest of the play! Or maybe we'll fill the time up with EVEN MORE COMMERCIALS!!! [''laughs maniacally'']
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cow''': Didn't you remember Mom always says we should never run into a burning school auditorium?
:'''Chicken''': It must've slipped my mind!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Orthodontic Police / Cow with Four Eyes&quot;===
:'''Red Guy''': [''as the Orthodontic Policeman''] What are you people, a bunch of communists?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Teacher''': Nothing is more important than straight teeth. Well, at least that's what the pantsless policeman said.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': ''[After getting his butt kicked by Supercow, he removes the last of the braces off the police officer]'' There, that's the last one.
:''[The policeman happily eats his doughnut and runs laughing.]''
:'''Red Guy''': ''[Is revealed to wear the permanent braces with a satellite attached to them]'' Okay, I did what you said, I removed the braces off everybody. Now can you take off mine?! That was the deal.
:'''Chicken''': Oh, I wish we could, but we have already rented you out as a Satellite Tracking Dish.
:''[Cow and Chicken laugh as Red Guy drives away after satellites drop from the sky]''
:'''Red Guy''': Is there a real orthodontist in the house?

===&quot;Cow Instincts, Don't It? / Ballerina Cow&quot;===

:'''Cow''': I'm a big fat loser!
:'''Chicken''': I could have told you the big and fat part.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Chicken's First Kiss / Squirt the Daisies&quot;=== 
:'''Winney''': Hi Chicken! I like your wattle! Do you clean it with special soap to make it so shiny?!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Mom''': Oh Chicken! You don't get cooties from being kissed; listen to Father!
:'''Chicken''': You don't?
:'''Dad''': No son. you get them from... toilet seats.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Space Cow / The Legend of Sailcat&quot;===
:'''Chicken''': [''to Cow''] They'd never let you go in outer space. There's no room!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Headhunting in Oregon / The King and Queen of Cheese&quot;=== 
:'''Dad''': We're going to Oregon to find some head hunters.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Walter Jeans-Begone, headhunter guide, at your service!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Hello! It's me, Larry Lackapants, Arkansas Cheese master, soon to be the King &amp; Queen of Cheese!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

==Season 2==
===&quot;Fluffy the Anaconda / The Laughing Puddle&quot;===
:'''Chicken''':CURSE YOU, LAUGHING PUDDLE! WHAT ''EVIL'' WELL DO! YOU! SPRING FROOOOOM!?!?!? Is anything in this cartoon ever going to make sense?!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': The cartoon you just saw is true. The water in the Laughing Puddle is what scientists call THICK WATER!!! Meaning that it has molecules the size of WATERMELONS!!! TOO THICK TO RUN DOWN THE HOLE, but thin enough for our characters to pass through! If you ever get a chance to jump into Thick Water, DO IT!!! It feels really gooey! [''laughs softly''] The night club Boneless Chicken was performing at was shut down shortly after the making of this cartoon due to health code violations, ANY QUESTIONS!? Ladies? [''puts hands to ears and makes a screeching noise''] No, I didn't think so. That's the ''real'' end. [''laughs'']
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

===&quot;Tongue Sandwich / Dream Date Chicken&quot;===
:'''Cow''': Uh, I believe...
:'''Tongue:''' He went that way.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cow''': [Humming as she runs the vacuum]
:'''Mom''': Chicken, why don't you take a hint from your sister and take out the garbage?
:'''Chicken''': [Begins raging] Stop rattin' on me! Why do I always have to do everything around here?! [''Breaks the T.V.''] GET OFF MY CASE! [''Banging his fists the walls in tune with his line'']
:'''Mom''': Honey, talk to your son; I had just about all I can take. [''Runs away, crying'']
:'''Dad''': Listen here, Chief: when you're all grown up and living like some hopped up and crazy bachelor, you can sleep on a pile of garbage for all I care! But as long as you're living under my roof, you've got to live by my rules!
:'''Chicken''': But-
:'''Dad''': That's it! I'll have no back-talk, Mister! You're grounded! [''Chicken goes into his room and slams the door''] [''Cow opens the door and gasps'']
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cow''': Where are you going?
:'''Chicken''': I am runnin' away to be a bachelor with cousin Boneless Chicken. No one tells him what to do; he just lays around his cool bachelor pad and does whatever he wants. Hasta la adiós, Cow. [''Chicken hops out of the window'']
:'''Cow''': Adiós, big brother. [She moos and then tears up, turning to her own bedroom] Oh, Chicken's a grown-up bachelor, and... I'm all alone! [Sits on the floor and cries] Ooh, I want to play grown-up bachelor, too! [Continues crying]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! For being a run away chicken. YOU TOO! Linda. FOR CONTRIBUTION TO THE DELQUINCY OF A CHICKEN! [laughing] OKAY, MEN! Get ready for your PUNISHMENT!

===&quot;Dirty Laundry / Grizzly Beaver Safari&quot;===
:'''Red Guy''': Geraldo Rearviewa, Super Cow critic.

===&quot;The Bad News Plastic Surgeons / The Exchange Stüdent&quot;===
:'''Teacher''': Everybody just shut your porktraps for a minute!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Plastic surgery isn't just a sport, it's l a way of life.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Oh, I like your spirit. You're hired. Oh, by the way, who did your wattle?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Which one of you weenies is our victim-slash-volunteer?
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cow''': Nip and tuck, short and curl, my brother Chicken is not a girl!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Chicken''': Couldn't have done this without you, Dr. Hiney.
:'''Red Guy''': Oh, please call me Dr. Hiney.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Policeman''': Hey, it says here you're a plastic pipe salesman from bend Oregon!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Chicken''': He wasn't even a New Mexican...
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Cow''': Mom! Dad! Photo-realistic beaver is teasing me again!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

==Season 3==
===&quot;Can Cow Come Out and Play?&quot;===
:'''Red Guy''': ''[riding his bike]'' Oh, nobody wants to play with me. I don't understand why!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Be free, world! Yonder forth! And populate! ''[sighs]'' 
:''[As they run out of a trailer, numerous people trample Red under their feet]''
:'''Red Guy''': Ouch, oh, oh, ow, oh, oh, oh! Oh. Ow! Oh, have a nice day! This is the happiest day of my life.
:''[Mom, Dad and Chicken standing on Red, Cow catches up to them]''
:'''Cow''': Oh, Mom, Dad, Big Brother! You're okay! Oh, I was so worried about you! Oh, you are a very bad ma... lady... whatever you are... for locking up everyone in the world in a trailer.
:'''Red Guy''': Sorry.
:'''Dad''': You know, kids? Being locked up in a trailer with the whole world has taught us a valuable lesson.
:'''Chicken''': Yeah? What is it?
:'''Dad''': Beats me!
:'''Mom''': But I'm sure it's valuable!
:''[Mom, Dad and Cow are laughing except Chicken]''
:'''Chicken''': I think I liked it better in the trailer.

===&quot;Chicken in the Bathroom&quot;===
:''[Mom has ordered Chicken to stay in the tub until he takes a bath, and Mom, Dad, and Cow need to use the toilet]''
:'''Dad''': Chicken? Hurry up and take that bath, I gotta get in there!
:'''Chicken''': No dice.
:'''Cow''': Chicken? Are you done yet? I need to visit the reading room... to read?
:'''Mom''': Me too, Chicken, can I, um, use the bathroom too?
:'''Dad''': Come on son, I gotta core the apple!
:'''Mom''': I have to launch the raft!
:'''Dad''': Come on Chicken, I have to brick up the chimney!
:'''Cow''': I need to stir the bean, big brother! Will you be much longer?
:'''Chicken''': I ain't takin' no bath!
:'''Dad''': Come on! I gotta, uh, uh, feed the ducks.
:'''Cow''': Why don't you just get it over with, Chicken? I need to wax the board!
:'''Chicken''': The bathroom is closed for the duration.
:'''Dad''': Chicken! For crying out loud, I gotta jump the gun!
:'''Mom''': ''I can't hold it any longer!'' ...Could you please hurry honey?
:'''Cow''': ''I gotta peel the onions!''
:'''Chicken''': How rude! Not while I am in the tub, bub!
:'''Mom''': Hurry up! Chicken! I gotta wash the window!
:'''Dad''': I gotta make peace with the Germans!
:'''Mom''': Gotta run for Congress here!
:'''All three''': Come on Chicken, take a bath already!
:'''Cow''': Chicken! It's time to flip the pickles!
:'''Dad''': Come on, Chicken!
:'''Mom''': I gotta resole the family christen!
:'''Cow''': I simply must pull the rip cord!
:'''Dad''': I must wash the windows!
:'''Mom''': I, I, I gotta spoon the balls!
:'''Cow''': Let the little puppies run! Please?
:'''Dad''': Gotta shake hands with the President!
:'''Mom''': Gotta press the issue!
:'''Cow''': Chicken, I need to let the cat out!
:'''Dad''': It's time to drive the governor home...
:'''Mom''': I... need... to... stuff... the... olives!
:'''Cow''': Have to shuck the corn!
:'''Mom''': Oooh! It is time to ''burp the baby''!
:'''Cow''': May I please stabber out the facts?
:'''Mom''': I... I... got... to... strike... my... pansy!
:'''Cow''': Lay some carpet, por favor!
:'''Dad''': Gotta talk to the boss! THAT IS IT, CHICKEN!!! 
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Dad''': Okay, men. I've got a plan.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Dad''' Ready or not, Chicken! (He, Mom, and Cow let out a battle cry and surround Chicken.) Son, if you don’t take a bath, then we'll give you one!
:'''Chicken''': (gasps)
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

===Chickens Don't Fly===
:''[Cow and Chicken approach the airplane, where they are greeted by Red Guy.]''
:'''Red Guy''': Hello! I'm Bunny, your Flight Attendant! Oh, isn't it a great day to be HURLED THROUGH THE AIR, twenty-three billion feet above the Earth, with only a vewy, vewy thin sheet of aluminium between you and A TEN MINUTE SCREAMING DROP to an abrupt stop?

===Chicken Lips===
:'''Chicken''': Not only am I not a boy, I'm not even a chicken! ''[breaks into tears]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Cow''': Ooh, I hope my big bwudder is gonna be okay, oh, if only I hadn't been whistwing in fwont of him, he wouwdn't have faced in dis wife, oh... I wish I nevew whistwed again in my wife!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Cow''': Evewyone can whistwe, Chicken, it is one of wife's speciaw out gifts.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

===101 Uses For Cow and Chicken===
:'''Cow''': ''[with a price tag on her labelled 19 cent]'' My buns are only 19 cents? ''[tearfully]'' '''I AM SO''' '''''CHEAP!!!''''' ''[sobbing and mooing]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': GOOD MORNING! Coffee, grandma? I think you'd make a ''great'' coffee cup. ''[opens up Chicken's beak, pours coffee in him, and starts spilling the coffee on himself]'' It leaks.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': ''[uses Chicken as a face towel]'' Hey, you're not ''bad'' as a towel! ''[looks at himself in the mirror; gasps]'' Oh! I didn't brush my teeth this year! Guess what ''you'' get to be! [squirts toothpaste on Chicken and starts brushing his teeth with him; spits in the sink] Ooh. I NEED A NICE CLOSE SHAVE! [sharpens Chicken's beak on a belt; starts shaving his chin and his tongue with Chicken] [shaves his armpit] AHH! CAN'T YOU AT LEAST HUM A LITTLE?! WORK WITH ME HERE!
:'''Chicken''': ''[blows raspberry at him]''
:'''Red Guy''':  THAT'S '''''IT!''''' NOW MY SHAVER'S SPITTING AT ME! I've been ripped off! YOU GUYS ARE USELESS! I'm taking you back to the store.

==Season 4==
===I Scream Man===
:'''Chicken''': My waddle is getting all wrinkly. I sure could use somethin' to wet my whistle. ''[Cow squirts milk at him]''  Somethin' besides ''that''.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Cow and Chicken get caught by Dad while trying to catch the Arbor Day Pig.]''
:'''Cow''': We're busted.
:'''Dad''': Oh, you kids know that you can't open this piggie until Arbor Day. ''[Arbor Day Pig has sticker labelled &quot;Do Not Open 'Til Arbor Day&quot; on his butt]''
:'''Arbor Day Pig''': Ha!
:'''Dad''': And that's three days away. ''[Pig blows raspberry, but then gasps]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': DING DING '''''DING''''' DING DING DING DING! STUPID SONG IS DRIVING ME... nuts!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': ''[with Cow and Chicken chasing him]'' THIS IS MADNESS!!! ''[screams]'' LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Oh ''crud''! I must've thrown out all my ice cream at those funny-looking kids. ''[gives Chicken ice cubes in an ice cream cone]'' Here you go, duck.
:'''Chicken''': Hey! This is just a ''cone'' with ice cubes in it!
:'''Red Guy''': And your point is? '''''NEXT!''''' 
:'''Cow''': Do you have any gravy freezies?
:'''Red Guy''': NO!
:'''Cow''': Frozen pork buttocks?
:'''Red Guy''': NO!
:'''Cow''': A beaver-tail cone surprise?
:'''Red Guy''': How about a beaver ''in'' a cone? ''[pulls out a beaver in a cone]'' SURPRISE! ''[leaps out of his ice cream truck]'' AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I DON'T ''HAVE'' ANY ICE CREAM, NONE WHATSO'''''EVER!''''' I don't even like ice cream. OR ''KIDS''! It says &quot;I Scream&quot; on my truck, not ice cream! Get it? Cause... I '''''SCREAM!''''' Look at me. ''[spins in circles]'' '''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!''''' Ooh. ''[chuckles]'' Screaming is my hobby!
:'''Police Officer''': ''[hits Red Guy with sausage]'' It's the padded cell for you, scream man!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mom''': How about some frozen Arbor Day piggie pops?
:'''Arbor Day Pig''': PIGGIE POPS?! OKAY! THAT IS ''IT''! TIME OUT! I've put enough with psychological torture for one pig! YOU GUYS ARE '''''CANNIBALS!''''' DO YOU '''''HEAR''''' ME?! YOU'RE ALL OFF YOUR ''NUT!'' ''[runs away screaming]''
:'''Mom''': What is up with ''that''?
:'''Dad''': You know, Mama, we lose more Arbor Day piggies that way.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': No actual Arbor Day piggies were hurt during the making of this film. But ''I'' was. My feelings were hurt! More than once! There was the first time in scene 40 and that once in scene 57 and... did you know that I do my own STUNTS? No stunt double for the Red Guy, oh no, no, no, no. ''[looks around]'' Feiss will not spring for that, no! I'm not good enough for a STUNT DOUBLE! ''[starts sobbing]'' OH, LIFE'S NOT FAIR! All right, you can end now. ''[laughs]'' END!

===Duck, Duck Chicken!/The Great Pantzini===
:'''Slappy the Pig''': See, kids? It's like I told you. You can surgically alter a chicken into a duck, but he's still the duck. All right, kids, forget what I said at the beginning of the show. Sometimes a sack of manure can be a duck. Oh, that's not right?! I don't know! I am not a scientist! I am a pig! WHY ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?! I AM BACON, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
:'''Red Guy''': The producers wish to apologise for the previous Slappy the Pig insert, it was a PATHETIC AND DESPERATE ATTEMPT ON THE PART OF SLAPPY TO PROLONG HIS LIFE!
:'''Narrator''': The producers wish to apologise for the previous outburst by the pantless actor who no longer works for the show. We are sorry... END!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red Guy''': Would you like to have your laughter back, too? ''[Laughs proudly crazy]'' END!!!

===The Cow and Chicken Blues/The Ballad of Cow and Chicken===
:''[last lines of the series]''
:'''Red Guy''': Yeah! hold it, It was brilliant! Bravo! Get up, my little crab friends. Ow! Oh, oh. Ow! Oh, oh. Ha, ha, ha, ha! Easy with the pinchers. Ow! Ow! Oh. I did not have to bring you guys tonight! Looks like Red Guy always gets in the END! Ha, ha, ha, ha!

==Voice cast==
* [[w:Charlie Adler|Charlie Adler]] as Cow, Chicken, The Red Guy and Boneless Chicken.
* [[Dee Bradley Baker]] as Dad.
* [[w:Candi Milo|Candi Milo]] as Mom and Teacher.
* [[w:Howard Morris|Howard Morris]] as Flem.
* [[w:Dan Castellaneta|Dan Castellaneta]] as Earl.

==See also==
[[I Am Weasel]]

==External Links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0118289|title=Cow and Chicken}}

[[Category:1990s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:1990s American surreal comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:1990s American sitcoms]]
[[Category:American animated sitcoms]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Television series on DVD]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Teletoon Retro shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about siblings]]
[[Category:TV shows about cows]]
[[Category:TV shows about chickens]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Television series by Hanna-Barbera]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network shows]]
[[Category:Adult Swim shows]]</text>
      <sha1>9w9do1ogt6jvx35cxenhhn8yg7qqmc2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Robin Hood (1973 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>9553</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964956</id>
      <parentid>3962943</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:20:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964956</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="18613" sha1="m5v8t0uf7i7c5n0aqg6i4cwci0b7r6j" xml:space="preserve">[[File:2022 pattern Tudor Crown (Sodacan style) 2D.svg|thumb|Oh, the world will sing of an English king a thousand years from now&lt;br&gt;And not because he passed some laws&lt;br&gt;Or had that lofty brow.&lt;br&gt;While bonny good King Richard leads that great Crusade he's on&lt;br&gt;We'll all have to slave away for that good-for-nothin' John]]
[[File:Ceremonial Mace of the Queensland Parliament.jpg|thumb|Incredible as he is inept&lt;br&gt;Whenever the history books are kept&lt;br&gt;They'll call him &quot;The Phony King of England&quot;!]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Robin Hood (1973 film)|Robin Hood]]''''' is a 1973 animated version of the English legend using the animals for the characters, was released by the [[w:Walt Disney Pictures|Disney Studios]] on November 8, [[w:1973 in film|1973]]. For instance, the main character in this well-known adaptation is a fox, as is his lover Maid Marian; his foe, Prince John, is a lion, and has a serpent sidekick named Sir Hiss.
:''Directed by [[w:Wolfgang Reitherman|Wolfgang Reitherman]]. Produced by [[w:Wolfgang Reitherman|Wolfgang Reitherman]]. Written by [[w:Larry Clemmons|Larry Clemmons]], [[w:Ken Anderson (movie writer)|Ken Anderson]], and based on the English folktale &quot;[[w:Robin Hood|Robin Hood]]&quot;.''
{{center|'''The way it ''really'' happened in Sherwood Forest!''' &lt;small&gt;[[#taglines|Taglines]]&lt;/small&gt;}}

[[File:Path in Sherwood Forest Country Park - geograph.org.uk - 1330930.jpg|thumb|&quot;Oh, for heaven's sake, son! You're no outlaw! Why, someday you'll be called a great hero!&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;A hero? You hear that, Johnny? We've just been pardoned!&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;That's a gas, we ain't even been arrested yet!&quot;]]

[[File:Une arbalète classique.jpg|thumb|&quot;Wait a minute. Is the safety on old Betsy?&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;You bet it is, Sheriff.&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;That's what I'm afraid of. You go first.&quot;]]

== Dialogue ==
:'''Alan A'Dale''': ''[opening lines]'' Y'know, there's been a heap o' legends and tall tales about Robin Hood. All different too. Well, we folks in the animal kingdom have our own version. It's the story of what ''really'' happened in Sherwood Forest... 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt; 
:'''Robin Hood''':  Rob? Tsk, tsk, tsk. That’s a naughty word. We never Rob. We just… sort of borrow a bit from those who can afford it. 
:'''Little John''': Borrow! Huh? Boy, are we in debt. 
:'''Robin Hood''': That sounds like another collection day for the poor. Eh, Johnny boy? 
:'''Little John''': Yeah. Sweet charity. 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Prince John''': One more hiss out of you, eh, er, uh, Hiss, and you are ''walking'' to Nottingham.
:'''Hiss''': ''[mutters]'' Snakes don't walk, they slither. Hmph. So there.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Little John''': Aw, how about that for luck? It's only a circus! A peanut operation!
:'''Robin Hood''': Peanuts? Why, you dunce, that's the royal coach! It's Prince John himself!
:'''Little John''': The prince? Wait a minute, there's a law against robbing royalty. I'll catch you later.
:'''Robin Hood''': What? And miss this chance to perform before royalty?
:'''Little John''': ''[groan]'' Well... here we go again...

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Robin Hood''': ''[dressed as gypsy]'' Oo-de-lally! Oo-de-lally! Fortune tellers!
:'''Little John''': ''[also dressed as gypsy]'' Fortunes forecast, lucky charms!
:'''Robin Hood''': Catch the dope, with your horoscope!
:'''Prince John''': Fortune tellers, how droll. Stop the coach!
:'''Hiss''': Sssire, sire, they may be bandits.
:'''Prince John''': Oh, poppycock! Female bandits? What next? Rubbish. ''[to Robin Hood and Little John]'' My dear ladies, you have my permission to kiss the royal hands, whichever you like... first.
:'''Robin Hood''': Oh, how gracious - ''[kisses hand and removes large ring]'' - and generous.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[After being robbed by a disguised Robin Hood and Little John]''
:'''Prince John''': ''[snivelling]'' No, no, no, no!
:'''Hiss''': I knew it. I knew it. I just ''knew'' this would happen. I tried to warn you, but no, no, no, you wouldn't listen, you just had to-- ''[Prince John raises his mirror in anger]'' Ah, ah, ah! Seven years' bad...''[the prince hits him, smashing the mirror]'' luck. That's what it is. Besides, you broke your mother's mirror.
:'''Prince John''': ''[screams]'' AAAAAAAAAH! Mummy! ''[sucks thumb]'' I've got a dirty thumb.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Robin Hood brings back the farthing taken by the Sheriff]''
:'''Mother Rabbit''': Oh, you have made his birthday a wonderful one. How can I ever thank you?
:'''Robin Hood''': I only wish I could do more. ''[hands her a small bag of gold]'' Here. And keep your chin up. Soon there'll be happiness in Nottingham again, you'll see.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[While playing a game, with Skippy (as Robin Hood) defeating and &quot;slaying&quot; Lady Kluck (as Prince John) in a duel]''
:'''Skippy''': Did I hurt ya? Huh?
:'''Lady Kluck''': ''[whispering, breaking character]'' No. Now, this is the part where you drag your lady fair off to Sherwood Forest.
:'''Skippy''': ''[pulling Marian away]'' Come on, fair lady, let's go!
:'''Maid Marian''': Oh, Robin, you're so brave and impetuous! ''[they sit down among the bushes]'' Oh... so this is Sherwood Forest?
:'''Skippy''': Yeah, I guess so. Well, now what are we gonna do?
:'''Maid Marian''': Well, usually, the hero gives his fair lady a kiss.
:'''Skippy''': A kiss? Oh, that's sissy stuff.
:'''Maid Marian''': Well, if you won't... then I will! ''[giggles and pulls him close, kissing him on the cheek]''
:'''Sis''': ''[to Tagalong and Toby Turtle]'' They're KISSING! ''[they all fall about laughing as Skippy wipes his cheek and scowls at them]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Friar Tuck''': Oh, for heaven's sake, son! You're no outlaw! Why, someday you'll be called a great hero!
:'''Robin Hood''': A hero? You hear that, Johnny? We've just been pardoned!
:'''Little John''': That's a gas, we ain't even been arrested yet!
:'''Friar Tuck''': All right, laugh, you two rogues, but there's gonna be a big to-do in Nottingham. ''[tastes their overcooked chow, coughing up smoke rings]'' Well-done, ain't it? Old Prince John's having a ''[coughs]'' championship archery tournament ''[coughs]'' tomorrow.
:'''Little John''': Archery tournament? Old Rob could win that standin' on his head, huh, Rob?
:'''Robin Hood''': Thank you, Little John, but I'm sure we're not invited.
:'''Friar Tuck''': No, but there's somebody who'll be ''very'' disappointed if you don't come...
:'''Little John''': ''[chuckles]'' Yeah. Old Bushel-Britches, the ''&quot;Honourable&quot;'' Sheriff of Nottingham.
:'''Friar Tuck''': No - Maid Marian!
:'''Robin Hood''': Maid Marian?
:'''Friar Tuck''': Yeah. She-She's gonna give a kiss to the winner! ''[chuckles]''
:'''Robin Hood''': ''[excited]'' A kiss to the winner! Oo-de-lally! Come on, Johnny! What are we waiting for? ''[cartwheels away]''
:'''Little John''': Wait a minute, Rob, hold it. That place will be CRAWLIN' with soldiers.
:'''Robin Hood''': Aha, but remember: &quot;faint heart never won fair lady&quot;. Fear not, my friends! ''[fires an arrow, which bounces back off one of their pans, then throws his hat in the air; the arrow misses it, letting it fall down and rest back on his head]'' This will be my greatest performance!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Little John arrives disguised as an English duke]''
:'''Hiss''': And you... who might ''you'' be, sssir?
:'''Little John''': I am Sir Reginald, Duke of Chutney. ''[stuffs Hiss' hat over his mouth]'' And don't stick your tongue out at me, kid. ''[to the Prince]'' And now, Your Mightiness, allow me to lay some protocol on you. ''[stoops to kiss Prince John's hand]''
:'''Prince John''': No, no, no, forgive me, but I lose more jewels that way. Please sit down.
:'''Little John''': ''[sits on Hiss]'' Thanks, PJ, you can't get a better seat than this, could you? The royal box...hey...what...who? ''[pulling out Hiss]'' Oh, uh, excuse me, Buster.
:'''Hiss''': ''Buster?! You'', sir, have taken my seat!
:'''Prince John''': ''[laughs]'' Hiss, with you around, who needs a court jester? ''[laughs again]'' Now get out there and keep your snake eyes open for you-know-who.
:'''Hiss''': ''[humiliated]'' You... you mean, I... I'm being dismissed?!
:'''Little John''': You heard His Mightiness! Move it, creepy, get lost! Begone, long one!
:'''Hiss''': ''[slithering away crossly]'' What cheek! &quot;Creepy&quot;? &quot;Buster&quot;? ''&quot;Long one&quot;?!'' Who does that dopey duke think he is?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[After being revealed and captured at the tournament, Robin Hood is about to be beheaded]''
:'''Prince John''': ''[looking nervous]'' STOOOP! Executioner, stop! Hold your axe!
:'''Little John''': ''[holding a dagger to his back]'' Okay, big shot. Now tell 'em to untie my buddy, or I'll...
:'''Prince John''': ''[flinches]'' Sheriff, release my buddy! ''[flinches again]'' I mean, release the prisoner!
:'''Sheriff''' ''[confused]'' Untie the prisoner?
:'''Lady Kluck''': You heard what he said, Bushel-Britches!
:'''Prince John''': Sheriff, I make the rules! And since I'm head man-- ''[flinches again, mutters back at Little John]'' Not so hard, you mean thing... LET HIM GO, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES! LET HIM GO!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Robin Hood''': And for our honeymoon? England?
:'''Maid Marian''': Yes!
:'''Robin Hood''': Normandy?
:'''Maid Marian''': Yes!
:'''Robin Hood''': Sunny Spain?
:'''Maid Marian''': Oh, why not? 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt; 
:'''Prince John:''' Hiss! You’re never around when I need you! 
:'''Sir Hiss:''' ''[stuck inside the barrel of ale]'' Coming! Coming! ''[singing drunkenly]'' For I’m a jolly good fellow, for I’m a jolly good fellow.... ''[Prince John removes the cork, letting him out]'' Oh! Oh, there you are, old boy! PJ, you won’t believe this, but the stork is really Robin Hood! 
:'''Prince John:''' ''[simmering with rage]'' Robin Hood. ''[Hiss nods happily; Prince John snaps and ties him in knots around a pole]''  AAAAAH! Get out of ''that'' if you can. 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Lady Cluck''': Down with that scurrrrvy Prince John!
:'''Little John''': Yeah!!! ''[sings]'' ''Oh, the world will sing''
:''Of an English king''
:''A thousand years from now,''
:''And not because''
:''He passed some laws''
:''Or had that lofty brow.''
:''While bonny good King Richard leads the great crusade he's on,''
:''We'll all have to slave away for that good-for-nothing John!''
:''Incredible as he is inept,''
:''Whenever the history books are kept''
:''They'll call him the Phony King of England!''
:'''Friar Tuck''': ''A pox on the Phony King of England!''
:'''Little John''': ''He stands alone''
:''On a giant throne,''
:''Pretending he's the King.''
:''A little tyke''
:''Who's rather like''
:''A puppet on a string!''
:''And he throws an angry tantrum if he cannot have his way,''
:''And then he calls for Mom,
:''While he's sucking his thumb''
:''You see, he doesn't wanna play.''
:''Too late to be known as John the First,''
:''He's sure to be known as John the Worst.''
:''A pox on that Phony King of England!''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Little John''': ''While he taxes us to pieces and he robs us of our bread''
:''King Richard's crown''
:''Keeps slipping down''
:''Around that pointed head''
:''Ah, but while there is a merry man in Robin's wily pack''
:''We'll find a way''
:''To make him pay''
:''And steal our money back.''
:''A minute before he knows we're there,''
:''Old Rob'll snatch his underwear...''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[the Sheriff of Nottingham has just taken the only coin out of the church's Poor Box]''
:'''Friar Tuck''':''[horrified]'' Now, just a minute, Sheriff! Th-th-th-that's the Poor Box!
:'''Sheriff''': It sure is, and I'll take it for poor Prince John. ''[chuckles]'' Every little bit helps.
:'''Female Church Mouse''': Ooh, you put that back!
:'''Sheriff''': And His Majesty also blesses you, little sister.
:'''Friar Tuck''': You thieving scoundrel!
:'''Sheriff''': Now, take it easy, Friar, I'm just doing my duty.
:'''Friar Tuck''': Collecting taxes for that arrogant, greedy, ruthless, no-good Prince John?!
:'''Sheriff''': ''[starting to lose patience]'' Listen, Friar. You're mighty preachy, and you're gonna preach your neck right into a hangman's noose.
:'''Friar Tuck''': GET OUTTA MY CHURCH! ''[shoving the Sheriff out of the church]'' Out! Out! Out! Out!
:''[Outside, the Sheriff draws his sword but struggles to hold off Friar Tuck, who beats him repeatedly with a stick]''
:'''Friar Tuck''': You want taxes?! I'll give you taxes!
:'''Male Church Mouse''': Give it to him! Give it to him, Friar!
:''[Swooping in, Trigger blinds Friar Tuck with the hood of his coat and the Sheriff puts a shackle around his neck]''
:'''Sheriff''': You're under arrest for high treason to the Crown!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
: ''[A rainstorm sends rain pouring down Nottingham and the castle. Inside the castle, lots and lots of gold bags and coins flank the throne. Prince John sits in the throne, scowling quietly and angrily, gritting his teeth and clenching his fists. Hiss stares at the prince]''
:'''Hiss''': Ahem. Sire, if I may...may venture an opinion, you're not your usual, cheerful, genial self today. ''[Prince John blinks his narrowed eyes, ignores him and continues scowling]'' I...I..I know! You haven't counted your money in days. Hmm? It always makes you so happy. ''[Prince John is still scowling, Hiss plays with the coins]'' Ahem. Sire...taxes are pouring in, the jails are full, and... Oh! I have good news, sire - Friar Tuck is in jail!
:'''Prince John''': ''[finally exploding furiously and throwing money everywhere]'' FRIAR TUCK?! IT'S ''ROBIN HOOD'' I WANT, YOU IDIOT! Oh, I would give all my gold if I could just get my hands on-- ''[pauses, turning to Hiss, his scowl turning to a mischievous grin]'' Did you say Friar Tuck?
:'''Hiss''': Did I? Y-y-yes, I did.
:'''Prince John''': Ah! Hiss, I have it! I'll use that fat friar as bait to trap Robin Hood!
:'''Hiss''': ''Another'' trap?
:'''Prince John''': Yes, yes, you stupid serpent! Friar Tuck will be led to the gallows in the village square, don't you see?
:'''Hiss''': ''[shocked]'' B-B-But sire! Hang Friar Tuck?! A man of the church?!
:'''Prince John''': Yes, my reluctant reptile. And when our elusive hero tries to rescue the corpulent cleric, ''[chuckles]'' my men will be ready. Ha-ha. ''[looks out through the window with a devilish grin]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nutsy''': ONE O'CLOCK, AND ALL'S WELL!
:''[The castle clock - actually set at three o'clock - chimes]''
:'''Sheriff''': ''[waking up]'' Nutsy, you better set your brains ahead a couple of hours.
:'''Nutsy''': Yes, sir. Uh... does that, uh, mean addin' or subtractin'?
:'''Sheriff''': Oh, let's forget it.
:'''Nutsy''': Yes, sir, Sheriff, sir! ''[salutes and walks away]''
:'''Sheriff''': Nutsy, how can I sleep with you yelling &quot;ALL'S WELL&quot; all the time here?
:'''Trigger''': Sheriff, everything ain't &quot;all's well&quot;. I got a feeling in my bones there's gonna be a jailbreak any minute--
:'''Sheriff''': ''[pushing his crossbow aside]'' Criminently, Trigger! Point that peashooter the other way!
:'''Trigger''': Don't you worry none, Sheriff. ''[patting it]'' The safety's on old Betsy--
:''[He accidentally launches an arrow, which they are both forced to dodge as it fires and bounces around]''
:'''Sheriff''': What in tarnation you tryin' to do, you birdbrain?! ''[bops Trigger on the head]''
:'''Trigger''': Just doin' my duty, Sheriff!
:'''Sheriff''': Oh, you and that itchy trigger finger of yours...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sheriff''': Wait a minute. Is the safety on old Betsy?
:'''Trigger''': ''[patting his crossbow again]'' You bet it is, Sheriff.
:'''Sheriff''': That's what I'm afraid of. You go first.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Prince John''': Oh, no. It's so miserably unfair!
:'''Hiss''': Well, I tried to tell you, but no, no, no, you wouldn't listen. Your traps just never work. ''[Fire consumes the castle]'' And now look what you've done to your mother's castle!
:'''Prince John''': '''AAAAAGH!''' Mommy! ''[sucks his thumb, becomes angry, and begins to swat at Hiss and chase him still sucking his thumb]'' Ohh! Hold still, you cowardly cobra!
:'''Hiss''': ''[dodging his blows]'' Aah! Ooh! Sire, no! Please! Oh, no!
:'''Prince John''': Procrastinating python! ''[screams through his sucking thumb]'' Ooooh! '''Aggravating asp!'''
:'''Hiss''': Save me! Ooh! 
:'''Prince John''': You eel in snake's clothing! 
:'''Hiss''': Help! He's gone stark raving '''MAD!''' ''[echoing]''

== Taglines ==
* The way it ''really'' happened in Sherwood Forest!
* Meet Robin Hood and his Merry Men-''agerie''!
* Join the Merriest Men''agerie'' in the world's best-loved legend.

== Cast ==
*[[w:Robin Hood|Robin Hood]], a [[w:Fox|fox]]—voice: [[w:Brian Bedford|Brian Bedford]]
*[[w:Maid Marian|Maid Marian]], a [[w:Fox|vixen]]—voice: [[w:Monica Evans|Monica Evans]]
*[[w:Little John|Little John]], a [[w:Bear|bear]]—voice: [[w:Phil Harris|Phil Harris]]
*[[w:John, King of England#Depictions in fiction|Prince John]], a [[w:Lion|lion]]—voice: [[Peter Ustinov]]
*Sir Hiss, a [[w:Snake|snake]]—voice: [[w:Terry-Thomas|Terry-Thomas]]
*Sis, a [[w:Rabbit|rabbit]]—voice: [[w:Shannen Doherty|Shannen Doherty]]
*[[w:Sheriff of Nottingham|Sheriff of Nottingham]], a [[w:Wolf|wolf]]—voice: [[w:Pat Buttram|Pat Buttram]]
*[[w:Friar Tuck|Friar Tuck]], a [[w:Badger|badger]]—voice: [[w:Andy Devine|Andy Devine]]
*Lady Kluck, a [[w:Chicken|chicken]]—voice: [[w:Carole Shelley|Carole Shelley]]
*[[w:Alan-a-Dale|Alan-a-Dale]], a [[w:Rooster|rooster]]—voice: [[w:Roger Miller|Roger Miller]]
*The Captain of the Guard, a [[w:Crocodile|crocodile]]—voice: [[w:Candy Candido|Candy Candido]]

==See also==
* ''[[Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves]]''

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}
* {{Commonscat-inline}}
* {{IMDb title|0070608}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:1973 animated films]]
[[Category:1973 American animated films]]
[[Category:1970s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:American animated romance films]]
[[Category:Animated films about animals]]
[[Category:Animated films about weddings]]
[[Category:Films directed by Wolfgang Reitherman]]
[[Category:Films about foxes]]
[[Category:Vigilante films]]
[[Category:Animated films about royalty]]
[[Category:Animated films set in castles]]
[[Category:Animated films set in the Middle Ages]]
[[Category:The Walt Disney Company]]
[[Category:Robin Hood animated films]]
[[Category:Films about hypnosis]]</text>
      <sha1>m5v8t0uf7i7c5n0aqg6i4cwci0b7r6j</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Dr. Dolittle 2</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>15230</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965159</id>
      <parentid>3962523</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:39:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-31994-37</username>
        <id>3332129</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965159</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="92748" sha1="2e3pa2xsrgo3qey0sietw04s7y8cg4a" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Dr. Dolittle 2|Dr. Dolittle 2]]''''' is the [[w:2001 in film|2001]] [[w:sequel|sequel]] to the [[w:1998 in film|1998]] film ''[[Dr. Dolittle (film)|Dr. Dolittle]]''. This time around, Dr. Dolittle has become an international [[w:celebrity|celebrity]] because of his ability to talk to animals, and must save the life of a [[w:circus|circus]] [[w:bear|bear]].

:''Written by '''Larry Levin'''. Directed by '''[[w:Steve Carr|Steve Carr]]'''.''
{{center|'''Dolittle Is Back.'''}}

== Archie ==
* I am the Alpha Bear! Grrr! Grrr! Bears say &quot;grrr&quot;, right?

== Lucky ==
* Go, doctor. Go, doctor.

== Dialogue ==
:''[bell rings]''
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Welcome to San Francisco, the city by the bay, home to 30,000 fire hydrants, four million tennis balls... and very liberal pooper scooper laws. My name is Lucky. I'm a dog, in case you hadn't guessed, and I belong to this man. You remember Dr. Dolittle, right? The guy who can talk to animals? If you don't, let me jog your memory. He's a doctor, and he talks to animals. Well, anyways, he's busier than ever.
:'''Woman''': Doctor, you've got Mr. Carson at 10:00 for a full workup. Mr. Wennington's E.K.G. is at 12:00. Mrs. Bloom called. She's got a bad rash. I told her 11:15.
:'''John''': I gotcha.
:'''Lucky''': Buster's got a deworming at 12:30. Misty's kennel cough is back. I put her at 1:00. Afternoon-wall-to-wall neuters.
:'''John''': You've got the Rotary Club dinner tonight.
:'''Lucky''': The Kennel Club breakfast tomorrow.
:'''John''': Push Mr. Carson to 11:00. I will deworm Buster at 12:00, do the E.K.G. at 12:30. Move Misty to 1:15. And stop mixing up my charts. Last week you almost had me neutering Mr. Panitch.
:'''Lucky''': From what I hear, you'd be doing Mrs. Panitch a favor.
:'''John''': Any time, ladies. Thank you.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' No matter how busy he got, Doc always found time to help animals.
:'''Bandit''': Hi. My name is Bandit.
:'''Dogs''': Hi, Bandit. How you doing, Bandit?
:'''Bandit''': ''[sniffles]'' And I'm a stray.
:'''Dogs''': That's okay. We're all strays.
:'''John''': I know how hard it is the first time to get up there. Take your time.
:'''Sheep Dog''': Just one paw at a time, Bandit. That's true.
:'''John''': Right. Never give up hope. Never, ever give up hope. Not just Bandit. All you dogs, listen to me. Every dog in here can find a family and be somebody's best friend. Let me hear you say that. Say, &quot;I am somebody's best friend.&quot;
:'''Dogs''': I'm somebody's best friend!
:'''John''': One more time. Again. I am somebody's best friend!
:'''Dogs''': I am somebody's best friend!
:'''John''': That's right. That's right. There's a family out in North Beach that's trying to find a good watchdog, somebody that's housebroken and great with kids. Any of you guys got a background in security?
:'''Hound Dog''': Oh, that'd be Rusty. Rusty's a watchdog.
:'''John''': Who's Rusty?
:'''Dog''': Rusty, tell-- Oh, no. Rusty!
:'''Rusty''': This better be important.
:'''John''': No, uh, never mind, Rusty. It says, &quot;Must not lick ass all the time.&quot;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Every zoo in the country had a job for the Doc. He was especially good at matters of the heart.
:'''John''': How long's it been since you guys made little baby turtles?
:'''Male Tortoise''': Oh, not that long. Maybe 20 years.
:'''Female Tortoise''': It'll be 48 years next Monday.
:'''John''': Okay, I see the problem here. I know what to do. Listen. I'm gonna give you these pills. Crush 'em up and put 'em in your food.
:'''Male Tortoise''': Oh, yeah? What do they do?
:'''John''': Oh!
:'''Male Tortoise''': Oh, yeah! You're looking fine! Coming at you, baby!
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' In fact, he became an international celebrity, traveling from Alaska to Australia.
:'''Steve''': I am here with Dr. Dolittle, who can actually talk with animals. We're here about to capture this alligator right behind us. The trick to capturing this guy is to put your arms around his neck... 
:'''Alligator''': Hey, Dolittle, see what I'm doing, I'm allowing Steve to think I don't know he's back there. Wait 'till he tries to grab me, turn on him and Bob's your uncle bite his arm off! ''[laughs]'' 
:''[Steve is still talking to camera]''
:'''Steve''': I'm gonna have to get my arm around his neck and handle his -
:'''John''': ''[having heard the alligator]'' Steve, I think he knows we're over here. 
:'''Steve''': ''[shushes Dolittle]'' Quiet, I don't wanna spoil the element of surprise...NOW! ''[Alligator roar noise]''
:'''John''': Oh! Oh! Oh!
:'''Steve''': Crikey! Me arm! ''[Belching sound]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Yeah, it seemed everybody wanted a piece of the good doctor. And his family understood. Well, most of them did. But we'll get to that part in a minute.
:'''John''': Thank you.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Right now I gotta answer the door.
:'''Lucky''': ''[muttering]'' Yeah? Who's there?
:'''John''': It's me. I forgot my key. Open up.
:'''Lucky''': Then I guess you'll have to beg. Come on, boy! Beg! Get it? Role reversal. 'Cause usually it's the human t-that says to the dog, uh-
:'''John''': I know you'd better open up the door before I... Just open the door, Lucky.
:'''Lucky''': Seeing as you're the one who feeds me, I'm gonna let you in.
:'''John''': Okay, thank you. Thank you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Guess who's back from France!
:'''Lisa''': John?
:'''John''': Hey!
:'''Lisa''': Hey! How you doing?
:'''John''': Hi, sweetie. ''[grunting]'' I got you a present from Paris.
:'''Lisa''': That's for me?
:'''John''': Yes, that's for you. That's for us.
:'''Lisa''': Oh! ''[laughs]''
:'''John''': I can enjoy this present as well.
:'''Lisa''': You know what would be a really nice present, though?
:'''John''': What's that?
:'''Lisa''': If you could keep that flock of your faithful away from the building.
:'''John''': I'm sorry. I'll talk to 'em later.
:'''Maya''': Daddy!
:'''John''': Hey, baby! How you doing? I got you a little present from Mexico.
:'''Maya''': Gracias. I wonder what it is.
:'''Pepito''': Aah! Earthquake! 9-1-1! Nueve-uno-uno!
:'''John''': Oh, no, no. I wouldn't shake it.
:'''Pepito''': Ow! My spleen! Ooh, that hurt.
:'''Maya''': Oh, he's so cute. Thanks, Dad.
:'''Pepito''': Hey, this isn't Puerto Vallarta.
:'''John''': It's a chameleon. It can change color against different backgrounds.
:'''Pepito''': The blendmaster is in the house! I gonna disappear! Now you see me- Poof! Now you don't, eh?
:'''John''': No, we can still see you.
:'''Pepito''': I'm not gone? I'm not invisible?
:'''Lisa''': You did remember Charisse's birthday?
:'''John''': I sure did. You remember to get the cake from Stinson's?
:'''Pepito''': How about now?
:'''Lisa''': Uh, actually, Charisse doesn't want to have a family birthday party.
:'''John''': What's that about? I thought we always celebrate together.
:'''Pepito''': You have anything green?
:'''John''': Take this thing to your room.
:'''Pepito''': Guacamole? A big pickle?
:'''Lisa''': She's got a date.
:'''Pepito''': I suck.
:'''John''': A date? With who?
:'''Lisa''': I didn't ask. She's a big girl now.
:'''John''': We'll see about this date thing. Where's the birthday girl at?
:'''John''': Uh, she's unreachable. What? Where is she?
:'''Lisa''': She's in her room with the door locked and headphones on. You could try paging her.
:'''John''': She's in the house and unreachable? I'm supposed to page her in my house. I'm gonna page somebody in my own house? Okay, we'll see if I'm gonna page some-- I ain't paging nothing!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': Careful, Doc, she's 16. That's a tough age.
:'''John''': Hey! Charisse, open this door! Can you believe this? Hey!
:'''Lucky''': Try her cell.
:'''John''': I'm not calling on the cell phone while she's in her bedroom.
:''[rattling doorknob]''
:'''John''': Hey! Charisse. Open the door! Okay. All right! Okay! Okay! ''[growling]'' Charisse! Charisse!
:'''Drunk Monkey''': ''[slurping, hiccuping]'' ''[chuckles]'' Those teenagers, Doc. They can drive a man to drink.
:'''John''': Hey, what are you drinking?
:'''Drunk Monkey''': [[w:Gatorade|Gatorade]].
:'''John''': Oh, really? Give it to me. ''[takes water pouch and smells drink]''
:'''Drunk Monkey''': Hmph!
:'''John''': Gatorade make wine now, huh?
:'''Drunk Monkey''': Naaaah!
:'''John''': You better slow down.
:'''Possum''': Which one of you is Dolittle?
:'''John''': What now?
:'''Possum''': I have a message from the boss.
:'''John''': From the who?
:'''Possum''': The boss, the guard beaver. Save the questions and come with me.
:'''John''': You guys know the rules. You just don't come up here on my balcony. Make an appointment. You make an appointment Now, go. You tell the beaver make an appointment just like everybody else.
:'''Possum''': I can't tell him that. I'll end up sleeping with the fishes.
:'''John''': How's it gonna look in the paper when Dolittle throws a possum off the roof? That's not gonna look right. Now, leave, 'cause I will.
:'''Possum''': Watch your tone, buddy.
:'''John''': ''[muffled]'' Charisse!
:'''Charisse''': Talk.
:'''John''': This is Daddy. How are you?
:'''Charisse''': Hey!
:'''John''': I got a couple of questions for you. I wanna know how come I gotta climb up the side of a building and get on a cell phone to talk to you!
:'''Charisse''': Calm down. Where are you?
:'''John''': ''[muffled]'' I'm outside of the building, right here!
:'''Charisse''': Dad! Dad, what are you doing?
:'''John''': What am I doing? It's the only way I can reach you! What are you doing in here? What's all of that about? You don't do that in public, do you?
:'''Charisse''': Dance? Of course.
:'''John''': That's not dancing. That's advertising. What's this about you don't want to spend your birthday with your family?
:'''Charisse''': Having dinner with your family is something you do when you're young, not when you're turning 16. Besides, I have a date.
:'''John''': You can bring your date 'cause you're coming to dinner.
:'''Charisse''': Cool! Eric, these are my parents and my little sister. They're joining us on our date.
:'''John''': No, he's gonna be joining us at a family event. We have it every year. I don't even know why-- ''[finds Charisse's report card]'' What's this?
:'''Charisse''': Dad, that's private.
:'''John''': I can see why it's private. it's embarrassing. You got two C's and a D.
:'''Charisse''': Embarrassing? ''[chuckles]'' Dad, you are the last person who should talk about anything being embarrassing.
:'''John''': What are you talking about? What's that supposed to mean?
:''[Drunk Monkey screeches, hiccups]''
:'''John''': I'm supposed to stop helping the animals because you find it embarrassing?
:'''Charisse''': That's not gonna happen.
:'''John''': That's right. It's not gonna happen. So forget about it. You're coming to dinner. Look at this. No cell phone for a week.
:'''Charisse''': What am I supposed to do without my cell phone?
:'''John''': Here's some stamps. Learn how to write a letter. You think I care? Do I look like I care? Look at me. No, Charisse.
:'''Charisse''': No.
:'''John''': Look at me. Do I look like I care? Look. I don't care.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': This is unbelievable. She has 50 numbers in here, not one of them is mine.
:'''Lisa''': You shouldn't be looking at that.
:'''John''': Why not? &quot;Biggie Mack, cell. Biggie Mack, pager. Biggie Mack, home.&quot; Who the hell is Biggie Mack?
:'''Lisa''': I don't know, John. 
:'''John''': I'm gonna find out who Biggie Mack is. I don't like that name. What the hell kind of name is that?
:''[phone rings]''
:'''Eldon''': What is that?
:'''Eldon's Wife''': Marcus's cell phone.
:'''Eldon''': Cell phone?
:'''Eldon's Wife''': Mm-hmm.
:'''Eldon''': When did he get a cell phone?
:'''Eldon's Wife''': Last week.
:'''Lisa''': What are you doing? John!
:'''John''': Shh! I'm checking out Biggie Mack.
:'''Eldon''': Hello.
:'''John''': Hey, who is this?
:'''Eldon''': Well, who is this?
:'''John''': Is this Biggie Mack?
:'''Eldon''': Who wants to know?
:'''John''': I'm asking the questions here, punk!
:'''Eldon''': What?
:'''John''': How old are you?
:'''Eldon''': None of your damn business.
:'''John''': What if I make it my business to find out how old you are?
:'''Eldon''': Are you threatening me?
:'''John''': I don't make threats! I'm promising you that if you ever--
:'''Lisa''': John!
:'''Eldon''': Is this John Dolittle?
:'''Lisa''': Hi, I'm so sorry. That's a wrong number.
:'''John''': That's a grown man on the other end of that phone.
:'''Lisa''': I wish I could say the same thing about you.
:''[doorbell ringing]''
:'''Lisa''': The door.
:'''John''': I hear the door.
:'''Lisa''': Go get that door right now!
:'''John''': Who am I, Mr. French? I got to get doors? Just a minute.
:'''Eric''': Hey, Dr. D. What's up? it's me.
:'''John''': Me? Who's &quot;me&quot;? Back up, &quot;me.&quot;
:'''Eric''': I'm saying, you gonna let me in? Dr. D. What's going on? Excuse me? Remember me? Eric, Domino's Pizza. Extra cheese, anchovies, guacamole?
:'''John''': You're the pizza guy, yeah.
:'''Eric''': I delivered that.
:'''John''': Thanks a lot, man. I forget to give you a tip? I'm sorry.
:'''Eric''': No, no, that's cool. You gave me something a little better than a tip.
:'''John''': I'm gonna take care of you. It's nice to have a little-- 
:'''Eric''': What's up, baby? What's going on? You ready?
:'''John''': Hold on. Wait. This is your date?
:'''Charisse''': Dad, Eric. Eric, Dad.
:'''Eric''': ''[chuckling]'' My man. What's up?
:'''Charisse''': Uh, Eric? Hmm, no. We have to stay here with the family and eat dinner.
:'''Eric''': Huh? It's cool with me.
:'''John''': Hey, Charisse, now, don't be like that. You gonna ruin dinner for everybody. Come on now.
:'''Eric''': You know what, pops? Don't sweat that. I know how to take care of her.
:'''John''': Pops?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Charisse has always had a mind of her own. When she was about a year and a half, she decided not to wear diapers anymore. Remember that?
:'''Lisa''': John.
:'''John''': She started having accidents around the house 'cause she didn't have it down yet. We'd have little piles--
:'''Charisse''': Dad, you just had to go there, didn't you?
:'''John''': This is family. We're talking the old days.
:'''Eric''': It's cool. I'm actually learning something here.
:'''John''': Really? You know what's interesting? You never learned to take off your hat at the dinner table. Isn't your head getting hot? Mine's hot just looking at you in that hat.
:'''Lisa''': Sixteen! Just think. In two years you'll be out of this house and on your way to college.
:'''Charisse''': One year, ten months, sixteen days.
:'''John''': You know what? Berkeley's a really close college. You could live at home, save money.
:'''Charisse''': That's a good idea. But I've already reserved a U-Haul for the day I graduated high school.
:'''John''': Oh. You reserved a U-Haul already?
:'''Maya''': Uh, Dad? Someone to see you.
:'''Joey''': Yo, step outside.
:'''John''': Thank you, sweetie. Excuse me, darling.
:'''Charisse''': Bye, Dad Love you.
:'''John''': I love you too. Excuse me, Eric.
:'''Joey''': Hey, hey, yo. Yo, down here. Okay.
:'''John''': What do you want?
:'''Joey''': First, let me say the beaver sends birthday greetings to your lovely daughter.
:'''John''': Really? That's very nice. Tell the beaver he's starting to get on my nerves.
:'''Joey''': Why are you getting bent out of shape? He only wants a moment of your time.
:'''John''': What if I say no?
:'''Joey''': I don't think you want to go down that road, my friend.
:''[knocks on window]''
:'''John''': Go and tell the beaver, 8:00, my office, tomorrow.
:'''Joey''': Oh, the beaver don't travel for nobody. He knows you're a busy man, and he will remember this, but this is truly a life-or-death situation.
:'''John''': All right, shut up, listen. My car, 7:00 a.m. All right?
:'''Joey''': Hey, this is good news. The beaver likes good news.
:'''John''': Thank you.
:'''Joey''': Jimmy, get the car.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Come on, blow your candles out and make a wish.
:''[Two girls she screams]''
:'''Rat #1''': Sweet...
:'''Rat #2''': Surprise!
:'''Rat #1''': Happy birthday!
:'''Rat #2''': It's your birthday! It's your birthday!
:'''Rat #1''': There's a mouse in the house!
:'''Rat #2''': Hey, give me that!
:'''Rat #1''': I am licking the candles!
:'''Rat #2''': Oh, yeah, you can lick my fat, funky little--
:'''Rat #1''': Hey, don't be a piggy!
:'''John''': Charisse, I'm so sorry.
:''[John he grabs two rats who popped out of birthday cake.]''
:'''Rat #2''': Hey, watch the fur! Watch the fur, buddy! We're trying to do something nice for your daughter.
:'''Rat #1''': A couple of cute little kitties pop out, you'd say, &quot;Oh, how cute! How cute!&quot;
:'''John''': ''[Hanging them over the edge of a window]'' But you're not. You're not- You're not-
:'''Rat #1''': Put me down!
:'''John''': Listen, you are not a couple of cute little kitties.
:'''Rat #2''': Yes, we are.
:'''John''': You are two disgusting rats...
:'''Rat #2''': No, we're not.
:'''John''': ...that just ruined the birthday cake.
:'''Rat #2''': Oh, so you wanna get personal now, dude? Well, do you know what &quot;rats&quot; spelled backwards is, mister? It's &quot;star!&quot;
:'''Rat #1''': That's right! I'm the star, buddy!
:'''John''': Oh, really, is that right? Well, do you know what &quot;ha&quot; spelled backwards is?
:'''Rat #2''': Uh, no, I don't have any--
:''[John he drops them.]''
:'''Rats''': Aaaaah!
:'''John''': Exactly!
:''[The two rats land safely in a garbage dump.]''
:'''Rat #1''': Could it be?
:'''Rat #2''': Yes, it is! Diapers!
:'''Rat #1''': My favorite! Chocolate!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Maya''': Say, &quot;Maya.&quot;
:'''Lucky''': Maya.
:'''Maya''': Maya.
:'''Lucky''': Maya.
:'''Charisse''': What do you think you're doing?
:'''Maya''': I think he's about to say something.
:'''Lucky''': Bring me a bone.
:'''Pepito''': And a large order of flies. Super-sized.
:'''Lucky''': You will bring me ham, luncheon meats, cold cuts.
:'''Charisse''': Lucky, out.
:'''John''': Hey. Maya, can I talk to Charisse alone for a second?
:'''Maya''': Okay. Come on, boy.
:'''John''': ''[sighs]'' Charisse, look, I'm sorry about tonight. I'm thinking about cutting back a bit and spending more time with you guys.
:'''Charisse''': Great, now more animals will be here.
:'''John''': What if we don't stay here? We can go on a big vacation to Europe, the whole family.
:'''Charisse''': Are you serious?
:'''John''': I'm dead serious. We can go to Paris, Rome, the Greek islands. We always talked about that. What do you think?
:'''Charisse''': Is this a bribe?
:'''John''': Yes, this is a bribe.
:'''Charisse''': It's working.
:'''Joey''': Yo, Doc, one other thing...
:'''John''': Tomorrow!
:'''Charisse''': What?
:'''John''': Tomorrow.
:'''Charisse''': Tomorr...
:'''John''': Yeah. European vacation. Tomorrow-Tomorrow! We're going to Europe tomorrow.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' So, Doc, the raccoon and the possum took a road trip to meet this mysterious beaver.
:'''Joey''': Hey, Doc, nice wheels. What do you call this thing?
:'''John''': Oh, this is a Mustang.
:'''Possum''':[Baby car seat] Yo, Doc, is there a car named after me?
:'''John''': No, I don't think they make a Possum.
:'''Possum''': Why not?
:'''John''': Not a lot of cars named after rodents.
:'''Joey''': I wanna go over a couple ground rules for when you're in the beaver's presence. Number one: No sudden movements. Number two: Do not stare at his teeth. Between you and me, he's got a little bit of an overbite. I personally think he needs braces, but I'm not a dentist. Numbers three through ten: You will treat him with the respect he deserves. Capisce?
:'''John''': We're talking about a beaver, right?
:'''Animal''': Hey, Doc!
:'''Joey''': Hey, Tootie, how you doing?
:'''Animal''': Hey, Doctor, how are you?
:'''Joey''': Back away from him, Jimmy. Show some respect, you animals.
:'''Owl''': Look, the raccoon got the doctor.
:'''Bird''': He says he's a miracle worker.
:'''John''': Hello?
:'''Joey''': Paulie, get the boss ready.
:'''Paulie''': I'm doing everything like you say, Joey. I'm just, I'm gonna go get some acorns.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Beaver''':Eh, Dr. Dolittle, I presume. Welcome to my den. Would you like a fish?
:'''John''': Oh, no, thank you. I've eaten already.
:'''Joey''': Hey, the beaver offers you a fish, you take the fish.
:'''Beaver''': Joey, shut up.
:'''Joey''': Sorry, boss.
:'''Beaver''': I've heard good things about you from some of the Bay Area families.
:'''John''': From the Bay Area families. Really? ''[chuckles]'' What are you guys, some kind of mafia?
:'''Joey''': Mafia? No. We don't know nothing about no mafia, do we, boys?
:'''Possum''': Nah, never heard of it.
:'''John''': No, that's a myth.
:'''Beaver''': I'm just a simple fisherman who's blessed with many friends. Perhaps you will be one of them.
:'''John''': What do you guys want from me?
:'''Beaver''': Well, I'm losing my territory.
:'''John''': What, the other animals moving in on you or something?
:'''Beaver''': Yeah, the human kind. They're cutting down our homes, busting up families. Word is they're cutting down the whole forest.
:'''John''': Guys, you're talking to the wrong person. You need to contact one of those nature groups like the Sierra Club or, um--
:'''Beaver''': It has to be you, Doc. You're the only one who knows how to speak human.
:'''Joey''': Yeah, we can't fight humans on our own. They got guns, knives, pullout couches. Sure, I got rabies. I could bite somebody. But I can only do so much!
:'''John''': You guys have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?
:'''Beaver''': Sure, I do. It's man against nature. But with you on our side, I like the odds.
:'''John''': Me on your side? I didn't say I was gonna help you. I didn't say.
:'''Beaver''': Doctor, before you say no, I would like you to see what we're talking about.
:'''Squirrel''': ''[sniffling]'' It's gone. Everything, gone.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': How do you save a forest, anyway?
:'''Lisa''': It's not gonna be easy, John. But I would assume the lumber companies have a lot of clout. I do know if there were a threatened or endangered species living in the forest, there are laws that protect it.
:'''John''': How am I gonna find out if there are any endangered animals in the forest?
:'''Lisa''': Well, you could ask Eugene.
:'''Eugene''':[He holding the baby orangutan] We found an endangered species of bear. A female whose mother had been killed by poachers. She's the only Pacific Western bear up there.
:'''John''': Good. One bear has to be protected.
:'''Eugene''': Well, no. The lawyers for Potter's Logging Company argued that since she's the only one there, there's no chance for survival of the species anyway. There'd have to be a male too.
:'''Giraffe''': Pardon me.
:'''John''': Why don't we get a male up there and let nature take its course?
:'''Eugene''': Unfortunately, The only male Pacific Western bear we could find was raised in captivity.
:'''Giraffe''': Excuse me.
:'''Eugene''': There's never been a bear raised in captivity that's been successfully reintroduced to the wild.
:'''John''': They've never had the world-famous love doctor making the introductions.
:'''Giraffe''': Psst! Doctor.
:'''John''': Excuse me a second.
:'''Giraffe''': Your man left the barn door open.
:'''Eugene''': Is something wrong?
:'''John''': Uh, d- Eh--
:'''Eugene''': Oh, jeez. Hope that Bam Bam didn't see that.
:'''John''': Oh, I'm sure... The giraffe is the one that was disgusted.
:'''Eugene''': I am so sorry.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': I know you're disappointed.
:'''Charisse''': Disappointed? About not going to Europe? Now, Dad, why would I be disappointed?
:'''John''': I made you a promise. I'm gonna stick to it. If you don't want me to do this, I'll understand. Okay?
:'''Charisse''': Like I can actually say no and not feel guilty for the rest of my life.
:'''Maya''': When do we leave?
:'''John''': As soon as we get a court order stopping the clear-cutting.
:'''Lisa''': Who's gonna argue the case?
:'''John''': Wh-Why you looking around?
:'''Lisa''': Me?
:'''John''': What, me? Not me. You.
:'''Lisa''': No, n-n-n-no.
:'''John''': Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
:'''Lisa''': No, no, John.
:'''John''': Yes, yes, yes.
:'''Lisa''': No. Don't make me do this.
:'''John''': Come on. For the animals. ''[mock whimpering]'' Do it for the animals.
:'''Lisa''': I don't do animal law.
:'''John''': That's species-ism. You're a species-ist. You' re a species-ist!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': No, Your Honor, we're simply asking for an injunction so that we might have the chance to save a species.
:'''Jack Riley''': ''[chuckles]'' Your Honor, this is a delaying tactic-slash-publicity stunt. I have affidavits signed by a range of experts who all concur that to take a bear raised in captivity and reintroduce it into the wild is, well, dangerous and irresponsible. Simply put, a bear raised by &quot;circus folk&quot; wouldn't know how to feed itself or interact with real bears, let alone make it through its first winter. No. it would certainly succumb to Darwin's law of nature: survival of the fittest.
:'''Lisa''': Actually--
:'''Maya''': Yeah, but Darwin never met my dad.
:'''Judge B. Duff''': Young lady, that's inappropriate behavior. And just who is your father?
:'''John''': Sir-- Your Honor, that's me. I'm her father. Name's Dolittle.
:'''Maya''': Dr. Dolittle.
:''[spectators murmuring]''
:'''Judge B. Duff''': Dr. Dolittle. Do you feel you could rehabilitate a tame bear and mate it in the wild with a female?
:'''John''': Yes, I do, Your Honor.
:'''Judge B. Duff''': In that case, I'll grant a one-month delay on the harvesting of Campbell's Grove. For one month, Dr. Dolittle. That's it.
:'''John''': Thank you, sir.
:'''Judge B. Duff''': And, Doctor, if that bear should so much as set one paw in a campsite or this town, I'll rescind this order immediately.
:'''John'''; I understand completely. Thank you, Your Honor. Thank you.
:'''Lisa''': Thank you, Your Honor.
:''[gavel bangs]''
:'''Reporter #1''': Doctor! Dr. Dolittle! Over here!
:'''Reporter #2''': Dr. Dolittle! Dr. Dolittle, you speak to both domestic and wild animals. Can a circus bear relate to a forest bear?
:'''John''': Well, I don't know much about him except that he's been living in captivity, so I'm sure he'll be really happy to return to the wild.
:''[Lisa mouths words]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' So much for a family vacation. But Doc figured, how hard could this be? That was before he met Archie.
:♪♪ ''[Rock]''
:'''Emce''': Ladies and gentlemen, he's the bear with flair, the walking rug with an adorable mug-Archie the bear!
:''[motorcycle engine revs]''
:'''Archie''': ♪ Get your motor running ♪ ♪ Head out on the highway ♪ They love me. Go.
:''[revving continues]''
:'''Archie''': ♪ Born to be wi-i-i-ild ♪
:''[crash]''
:'''Archie''': Ow! Gee! ♪ And that's the show ♪♪ Whew! Big-boned gal, huh?
:'''John''': Oh. ''[chuckles]'' Yeah, I guess so.
:'''Archie''': Got any action shots? You know what I'm talking about.
:'''John''': No, I don't, but listen, you'd be lucky to wind up with somebody like her.
:'''Archie''': Look, I have had so many girlfriends, you know-- ''[chuckles]'' Okay, look, I've never had a girlfriend. just bring her by on Monday. That's when I'm dark. Okay?
:'''John''': I can't bring her here. You have to go to her.
:'''Archie''': Whoa, whoa. Go to her? Where?
:'''John''': Um, she's in the forest.
:'''Archie''': Ooh, uh, I don't play forests. I'm strictly a state fair, small arena-type bear.
:'''John''': Archie, Do you know what kind of bear you are?
:'''Archie''': Um, let's see. Yes. I'm a singer. Dancer-- three years tap, two years jazz.
:'''John''': No, Archie, you're an endangered species.
:'''Archie''': Is that a threat, buddy? Because my lawyer will be down here--
:'''John''': No, I'm not threatening you. You're a very rare bear. You're a Pacific Western bear. You know what that is?
:'''Archie''': Yes, I know what-- I can play any kind of bear. I've got range. Grizzly, panda. Here, check out my polar. I am freezing! It is cold!
:'''John''': I haven't made it clear. Let me break it down to you. Your ancestors come from the mountains of California.
:'''Archie''': Yes, blah, blah, blah.
:'''John''': When you were six months old, they took you from your mother and taught you to wiggle your hips to a recording of &quot;Hound Dog.&quot;
:'''Archie''': No, no, I taught myself that. I admit I pander, 'cause I'm a pander bear! Get it? Ha ha ha! Pander!
:'''John''': Yeah, that's funny stuff, Archie. But listen, what I'm proposing to you is, I'd like to take you back to where your ancestors roamed, get you out in the woods and teach you to be a real bear.
:'''Archie''': Look, I like the bear I am. Okay? I'm famous! Have you been to the gift shop? I have my own beanie baby.
:'''John''': You do this, you'll be the most famous bear in all the world.
:'''Archie''': Bigger than [[w:Winnie the Pooh (Disney character)|Pooh]]?
:'''John''': Are you kidding me? You pull this off, they'll be saying, &quot;Winnie the who?&quot;
:'''Archie''': You've got yourself a bear.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Reporter''': And in what must be one of the most unusual stories of the year, Dr. John Dolittle is trying to rewrite the laws of nature by attempting to reintroduce a performing bear into the wild. In doing so, he hopes to save an entire forest from destruction. It's Darwin versus Dolittle.
:'''Jack Riley''': Oh, get over yourself.
:'''Joe Potter''': Governor, I've got two lumber mills waiting for that wood.
:'''Governor''': I understand, Joe, but it's complicated. Especially if that endangered bear survives.
:'''Joe Potter''': I don't meet my quota, Governor, you're the one who's gonna be endangered.
:'''Jack Riley''': Now, now, J.P., not to worry.
:'''Governor''': That ridiculous bear is bound to screw up at least once.
:'''Jack Riley''': And when he does, you'll have yourself a new trophy.
:'''Joe Potter''': And I've got just the place to put him.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' So we all moved to the forest and waited for Archie to arrive. While the family settled, it was time I started looking out for number one.
:'''Lucky''': ''[chuckles]'' Huh? ♪ Doo-do-do-do-doo ♪ This looks like as good a place as any. Ah, the simple pleasures of life. Holy lord! That wolf is a fox! I hope I don't have dog breath, you know, from licking my own-- Never mind. Oh, you like that, huh? Yeah, that was me. ''[chuckles]'' Plenty more where that came from.
:'''Wolf''': ''[growls]''
:'''Lucky''': &quot;Grr&quot; to you too. What is that, some kind of secret wild lady dog code for &quot;You like me&quot;? Yeah, I do some dancing. Here's a little move I call the back-scratcher. Pretty cool, huh? H-Hey, hot lady, wait. Where you going? Call me!
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' And so, the big day finally came, and I had a feeling the fur was gonna fly.
:'''John''': Okay, everybody, you all know why we're here. We're about to try to do something that's never been done before. Everyone thinks we can't pull this off, and they got their blades sharpened and their trucks ready to roll. But we're gonna prove 'em wrong, right? That's right. Now I want everybody to put their claws together. How about a big round of applause for the bear that's gonna lead the way? Let's hear it for Archie!
:''[animal murmuring]''
:'''John''': Yeah! Come on!
:'''Archie''': Are you ready to save the forest? ♪ Put your paws up Put your paws up, come on, now ♪
:'''Squirrel''': Is this some kind of joke?
:'''Archie''': Hey, I wanna go serious on ya for a second. I know I've got my work cut out for me, but with your help I know one thing... ''[whispers]'' Now. Go.
:♪♪ ''[piano intro]''
:♪♪ ''[up-tempo disco]''
:'''Archie''': ''[off-key]'' ♪ I will survive ♪ ♪ Yes, I will survive ♪ ♪ As long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive ♪ ♪ Yes, I will survive ♪ ♪ As long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive ♪♪ Everybody!
:♪♪ ''[Archie humming]''
:'''Deer''': We're dead.
:'''Crow''': Nevermore.
:'''Forest Animal''': This show's over.
:'''Rabbit''': Let's go fool around.
:'''Beaver''': You got your work cut out for you, Doc.
:♪♪ ''[fades]''
:'''Archie''': I'm done. Turn it off.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': You're not a real bear. You're Wayne Newton in a bear suit.
:'''Archie''': So dirty. Look at my paws.
:'''John''': It's the woods, Archie. Its chief component is dirt.
:'''Archie''': Wait. Hey, Doc, is that her? She's a babe.
:'''John''': Yeah, that's her.
:'''Archie''': Oh. Look at the way she moves. Man, would I love to see her wet.
:'''John''': I tell you what. I'm gonna go over and introduce you. You just wait over there. OK?
:'''Archie''': Yeah, good. Hey, tell her I really dig her fat pouch, but don't be crude.
:'''John''': I'll try to work that in.
:'''Archie''': Okay, good. Wait, hey... Gah!
:'''Ava''': Are you coming over here? I'm a little busy foraging.
:''[Dr. Dolittle meets a Pacific Western bear named Ava and makes a proposition]''
:'''John''': Hi.
:'''Ava''': Hi.
:'''John''': Hello. My name is John.
:'''Ava''': I'm Ava.
:'''John''': Hi, Ava. That's a pretty name. Nice to meet you.
:'''Ava''': Hi.
:'''John''': Hey, uh, quick question, Ava. How would you like to meet the man of your dreams?
:'''Ava''': You're real cute, but I don't go interspecies.
:'''John''': I'm not talking about me. I shoulding have said man. I should've said bear. The bear of your dreams. What do you think of that big, magnificent hunk of bear there?
:'''Ava''': Um, I don't think I see him. Oh, is he standing behind that dork?
:'''John''': Oh, no, he is... Look, let me explain to you what's going on, all right? There's a logging company that's gonna tear down this whole forest, everything. The only thing that can stop 'em... is if I can get two Pacific Western bears together. You're a Pacific Western bear, and so is he. If I can get you together and you made little Pacific Western bears, then-- You see where I'm going with this?
:'''Ava''': Uh-huh, yeah. ''[walks away]'' Look, no offense, but I don't talk to bear pimps.
:'''John''': Hey, wait a minute. At least let me call him over so you can meet him. Archie, come over here.
:'''Archie''': Hey, Johnny, there you are. Come on. I thought we were gonna go work out. Jeez.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Okay, Archie, you're on.
:'''Archie''': What do I say to her?
:'''John''': Get to know her a little. Tell her about yourself.
:'''Archie''': Hi! I'm Archie. ''[nervous chuckle]'' I like moonlit walks on the beach, uh, sharing slop buckets with that special someone, and the soulful sounds of the Backstreet Boys.
:'''Ava''': You're very weird.
:'''Archie''': Weird, as in sexy?
:'''Ava''': No, just weird.
:'''John''': Hey, Archie, uh, why don't you let me take it from here? That was good.
:'''Archie''': Okay. ''[whispers]'' Damn!
:'''John''': What do you think of Archie? Cute?
:'''Ava''': Oh, don't make me eat you.
:'''John''': Stop that. He's a little uncomfortable around the female species at first--
:'''Ava''': That's not even really the point. I need a real bear, someone who can hunt and protect and provide for me.
:'''John''': Oh. Okay. I can understand that.
:'''Ava''': Oh, and I'm already involved with someone.
:'''John''': Really? You have a boyfriend already-a &quot;bearfriend.&quot; Are you in love this bear?
:'''Ava''': &quot;Love&quot;? My cousin married for love, and the next thing she knows... he's two-timing her with this hot little grizzly in a cave up north.
:'''John''': Okay, so you're not in love?
:'''Ava''': No.
:'''John''': All right, let's make a deal. Don't make any decisions for a month. I'm gonna go work with Archie, and in a month's time I'm gonna turn that bear... into a bear that you'll be proud to have little bear cubs with.
:'''Archie''': Check it out! I've flipped for you... ''[crunch]'' Pinecone. Gah!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Hey.
:'''Charisse''': Hey.
:'''John''': ''[sighs, inhales, sighs continues]'' Perfect night.
:''[crickets chirping]''
:'''John''': Sitting' here, breathing fresh country air, listening to the crickets chirp.
:'''Charisse''': Yep.
:'''John''': You know what the crickets are saying?
:'''Charisse''': Dad, I don't speak to the animals. You're the one who understands 'em, not me. Little monkeys don't come up to me asking me for a 40-ounce. I don't say, &quot;Can I help you, little animal? Need a shot?&quot; I don't do that. I'm in my room listening to music. You see me talking to the animals?
:'''John''': Hey, Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey! Slow it down a second. I was just gonna tell you that crickets are natures thermometers, that's all. You can tell how cold it is by how fast they chirp.
:'''Charisse''': It seems a little cold out here, doesn't it?
:'''John''': Yeah, a little nippy.
:'''Charisse''': Maybe I need to go get my vest. Yeah.
:''[distant rhythmic thumping]''
:♪♪ ''[hip-hop]''
:''[vehicle approaching]''
:♪♪''[car stereo: hip-hop continues]''
:''[chattering laughing]''
:'''Eric''': Yo, Dr. Dre is still the best. Hey, and get a tuneup, man. Get a tuneup. Yo, what's up, baby?
:'''Charisse''': Hey, Eric.
:''[car races away]''
:'''Charisse''': Mmm!
:'''John''': H-H-Hey! Hey! You left your homey!
:'''Eric''': What's up, Dr. D?
:'''John''': I don't know, Eric. Maybe you should tell me.
:'''Eric''': Yo, man, I came to visit. Since y'all love me so much, I was gonna stay a couple days.
:'''John''': No, no. Hell, no. Charisse, I don't understand.
:'''Charisse''': What's not to understand, Dad?
:'''John''': Eric with bags. I don't understand that.
:'''Charisse''': He's staying here for a couple nights. Mama said so.
:'''John''': Oh, your mother said so.
:'''Charisse''': Yes.
:'''John''': Oh, okay. Eric, you gonna be on the floor in the living room in a sleeping bag, if you don't have a problem with that. By the way, Eric, I'm watching you. And not just me. I got eyes all around the woods. You know I talk to the birds. Right?
:'''Charisse''': Thanks, Dad.
:'''John''': Yes, so watch your back.
:'''Eric''': ''[laughs]'' I feel you.
:'''John''': You feel me? Okay. All right. I'm watching... I'm watching you, Eric! I'm watching your back!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''TV Narrator''': Bears are opportunistic eaters, finding food wherever they can.
:'''Archie''': Can we please see what else is on?
:'''John''': You need to watch this so you can learn... how to feed yourself and survive during the winter.
:'''Archie''': What is he doing? Digging?
:'''John''': You never even wondered what your sharp claws was for?
:'''Archie''': Uh, no.
:'''Narrator''': Bears are excellent swimmers.
:'''Archie''': ''[shudders]'' Not this bear.
:'''John''': I know you're not gonna tell me you don't know how to swim.
:'''Archie''': Wait, you haven't heard? There's a new invention. it's called... the boat!
:'''John''': That's the last straw. Get up at dawn. I'm teaching you how to fish.
:'''Archie''': How 'bout noon-ish?
:'''John''': Unbelievable.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' And so began the bear-athon, a training mission so &quot;grizzly,&quot; so un-bear-able, so hairy-that's enough.
:'''John''': Archie, let's do it. This river's full of fish. Let's go.
:'''Archie''': Yup. So is Red Lobster.
:'''John''': Don't look at me, look at the water. That's where the fish are.
:'''Archie''': They're moving. Oh, man, one just touched me. One just touched me!
:'''John''': Look, you big, furry baby, put your face down right now and grab a fish!
:'''Archie''': No!
:'''John''': Archie! I want to do just like you saw on TV. Put your face under the water and catch a fish can do it. Come on, man. I'm here with you. Go under the water.
:'''Archie''': All right! I'll try it.
:'''John''': All right, one, two, three...
:''[Archie inhales deeply]''
:'''Fish #1''': That's Archie!
:'''Fish #2''': What's up?
:'''Fish #3''': What's up?
:'''Wassup Fish''': What's up?
:'''Archie''': ''[gurgling]'' Hey, fellas, what's up?
:'''John''': Okay, okay, get one.
:'''Archie''': ''[gurgling]'' Can't breathe!
:'''John''': Archie!
:'''Archie''': Can't breathe!
:'''John''': Hey! Archie. Archie! ''[grunting, panting]''
:''[Archie burps, groans]''
:'''John''': OK, Archie. You tell me how smart do you have to be to lift your head out of the water when you can't breathe?
:'''Archie''': I saw a light. It was a bright light. It was beautiful.
:'''John''': OK, That;s it. We're gonna take you on a little trip right now that's gonna toughen you up. Come on.
:'''Archie''': What? What?
:'''John''': We're gonna find something even you can catch. Come on.
:'''Archie''': I saw my grandma.
:'''John''': Go on, eat.
:'''Archie''': Oh, I...
:'''John''': Come on, eat!
:'''Archie''': They're-I don't eat, uh- I'm good. Thanks. ''[sniffs]'' Okay, am I close?
:'''Lucky''': Cold.
:'''Pepito''': Use the Force.
:'''Archie''': Colder? Warmer?
:'''Lucky''': Arctic.
:'''Lisa''': So, how's it going?
:'''John''': It's going great, honey. I'm not even gonna need three weeks. Honey, look, he's already foraging grapes. Right?
:'''Eric''': Why's he walking away from 'em?
:'''John''': He's not walking away. He's circling the grapes.
:'''Eric''': Why? Are they dangerous grapes?
:'''John''': No, no, the grapes aren't dangerous, Eric.
:'''Archie''': Seriously, where are the grapes?
:'''John''': Don't worry, he's doing great. We're right on schedule.
:'''Archie''': I'm getting dizzy! Ohh! Oh! Oww! ''[crashing down stairs] I'm okay! Concrete broke my fall! Definite bruise.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': Now, explain this again. I'm supposed to climb into a small, dark space and sleep for six months?
:'''John''': That's what bears do. It's called hibernation.
:'''Archie''': Sounds more like depression. Wait, how do I eat?
:'''John''': Well, you don't eat. What you do is, you eat a lot during the summer. That lasts you throughout the whole winter.
:'''Archie''': Where do I go to the bathroom?
:'''John''': No going to the bathroom.
:'''Archie''': ''[laughing]'' What? You're kidding.
:'''John''': I'm serious. What you do is, a week before you hibernate you start eating things like dirt and moss and hair and grass, and it forms a big plug in your, um-- it p-plugs up your, uh- Uh, you know.
:'''Archie''': It blocks my butt?
:''John''': Yeah, it blocks it all up with this big, nasty, hairy plug of hair and grass. It's a big, nasty plug.
:'''Archie''': Whoa, wait. You want me to sleep for six months with a big cork in my butt?
:'''John''': Yeah, that's the idea of it.
:'''Archie''': Okay, good-bye! See ya later!
:'''John''': Hey, Archie, come back here!
:'''Archie''': Nope, I'm gone! See ya!
:'''John''': Archie!
:'''Archie''': Hey, heading south?
:'''John''': Archie, nobody's gonna pick up a hitchhiking bear.
:'''Archie''': Look, I'll split the gas and sit in the back with the kids.
:'''John''': Come on, Archie, stop it.
:'''Archie''': I'm sorry, Doc. This isn't working out. I almost drowned. Ava doesn't like me.
:'''John''': Look, I'm tired of your complaining. Archie. OK? Look up in this tree. What do you see, huh?
:''[bird squawks]''
:'''Archie''': Bird.
:'''John''': Right. A bird in his home. On the branch below him there's a squirrel in his home. And there's a little rabbit in his home. All these animals are depending on you. Hey. you can do this. Just listen to your inner bear. OK? Just trust him. He'll tell you what to do. Just trust him, Archie. Come on.
:'''Archie''': Okay, but I gotta tell ya, my inner bear has a problem with the butt plug.
:'''John''': All right, that's it, I'm gonna show you what happens to animals that don't have a home. Come on.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Black Pig''': ''[imitating [[Hannibal Lecter|Hannibal Lecter]]]'' Hello, Clarice.
:'''Archie''': Uh, Doc, this isn't necessary.
:'''John''': It's time for a little tough love. Come on.
:'''Young Zoo Bear''': Look, Iggy! What's the matter, boy? Couldn't make it on the outside?
:'''Archie''': Hey--
:'''Young Zoo Bear''': Come on in, powder puff.
:'''John''': Go on in there.
:'''Archie''': But wh-why?
:'''John''': There's a couple bears inside that want to meet you. Go. Come on.
:'''Archie''': I'll just sit over on that side of the cell.
:'''John''': I'm tired of this madness.
:''[phone rings]''
:'''Archie''': Don't be scared.
:'''Young Zoo Bear''': I'll bite ya!
:'''John''': Yes, Dolittle. Oh, hi, honey!
:'''Old Zoo Bear''': Don't like to hunt? Don't like to fish? You know what I would give to be in the forest instead of in this dump?
:'''Archie''': Uh, Doc!
:'''Young Zoo Bear''': Do I hear someone talking?
:'''Archie''': No, no.
:'''Young Zoo Bear''': See, that's the problem with kids today-no respect. Kid think he knows my life.
:'''Old Zoo Bear''': He needs us to teach him a lesson.
:'''Archie''': N-No, I just--
:'''Old Zoo Bear''': I'm gonna give him a bear hug. Get over here let me give you a bear hug. Get over here, Tiny.
:'''John''': No, it's actually going quite well. I finally got this under control.
:''[snapping]''
:'''Bears''': ♪ Her name was Lola ♪
:'''Archie''': Yeah!
:'''Bears''': ♪ She was a show bear ♪
:'''Archie''': Whoo!
:'''John''': Lisa, let me call you back.
:'''Bears''': ♪ With yellow feathers in her hair ♪ ♪ And her dress cut down to there ♪
:'''Archie''': Where?
:'''Bears''': ♪ At the Copa ♪
:'''Archie''': Yes!
:'''Bears''': ♪ Copacabana ♪
:'''Archie''': Doc, apparently everyone in this place loves musicals.
:'''Bears''': ''[♪♪ continues, fades]''
:'''Archie''': I'm kidding. I'll try harder.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Meanwhile, while the cat's away, the mice will play, and by mice I mean teenagers.
:'''Eric''': All right, they still closed?
:'''Charisse''': Yes.
:'''Possum''': Here they come.
:'''Charisse''': You did all this?
:'''Joey''': Okay, boys, this is it. Remember what the Doc said. If this punk tries anything fresh, we let him have it. Capisce?
:'''Eric''': I got wings, legs, tacos, whatever.
:'''Pepito''': Taco? Did somebody say taco?
:'''Joey''': No, no, blend in, blend in. You're gonna blow our cover.
:'''Eric''': Charisse, there's something I been meaning to do since we got out here.
:'''Charisse''': Oh, really. What's that?
:'''Eric''': This.
:'''Joey''': Now!
:'''Eric''': Eeeew!
:'''Drunk Monkey''': He French-kissed me! Blecch! Blah! Blah!
:'''Joey''': Now, that worked out nicely. The drinks are on me, Jenny.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Meanwhile, the doctor gave Archie and me some lessons of our own.
:'''Lucky''': Could you leave a little for me? Technically, it is my--
:''[wolf growls]''
:'''Lucky''': Just a thought.
:'''John''': Hey! What's going on here?
:'''Lucky''': I've been so blessed, I feel I should give back to the hot lady dog.
:'''John''': You don't have to put up with that. Get outta here!
:'''wolf growls]''
:'''Lucky''': That is one hot fox.
:'''John''': What's the matter with you two? Don't you know that every female is looking for the strongest male?
:'''Archie''': But what about personality?
:'''Lucky''': I'm gonna die a virgin.
:'''John''': Shut up and listen. The strongest male is called the alpha male. The alpha male wants everybody to know he's the boss male. You have to be him-- the boss of all the males. You have to learn how to walk like the alpha male. Walk the walk.
:'''Archie''': Walk the walk.
:'''John''': And talk the alpha male talk!
:'''Lucky'''; I'm still on the walk.
:'''John''': It's about power and respect. It's about pure, uncompromised, testosterone-driven male power!
:'''Lisa''': John, didn't I ask you to line the garbage pails?
:'''John''': You line 'em your damn self, woman!
:'''Lisa''': What?
:'''John''': I-I'm sorry, honey. I was talking to the animals. I got a little riled up. I was teaching 'em something.
:'''Lisa''': Stop messing with those animals and go and get us something to eat.
:'''John''': I'm on my way. Going right now, honey.
:'''Lisa''': Go.
:'''Lucky''': Way to go, alpha male. Talk the talk.
:'''John''': Shut up!
:'''Lisa''': Who are you telling to shut up?
:'''John''': I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to the animals. I'm going to get the food.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': You sure you don't want another one of these things?
:'''Archie''': No, I'm fine.
:'''John''': Okay. I got a question for you, Archie. Let's say you spend your whole life in show business. Right? What's gonna be your big finish? Every act has to have a big finish.
:'''Archie''': Big finish? Check it out. San Francisco Bee. Quote. &quot;The best thing about Archie's act is when it's finished.&quot; End quote.
:'''John''': No, I mean in life. Who you gonna share your success with, your hopes, dreams, fears and failures? I tell you what. Everything I do wouldn't mean anything if didn't have my wife and kids to go home to.
:'''Archie''': Sometimes I do get very lonely. I've never been in love.
:'''John''': Okay, this is your big chance. I think Ava really likes you.
:'''Archie''': Did she say something? What'd she say?
:'''John''': You gotta learn to read between the lines sometimes.
:'''Archie''': She loves me? I knew it!
:'''John''': Hey, let's not get carried away. All right, Archie?
:'''Archie''': I feel like I'm about to burst. So, this is what love feels like, right? Oh. Or maybe it's the marshmallows. ''[burps]''
:'''John''': I think it's the marshmallows. You ate a whole bag of 'em.
:'''Archie''': Doc, tomorrow you're gonna see a brand-new bear.
:'''John''': You know, Archie, I think I'm gonna call it a night.
:'''Archie''': Don't go. It's a little scary out here for me. Can you stay here till I fall asleep?
:'''John''': Okay, I'll wait till you fall asleep. Then I'm leaving.
:'''Archie''': Hey, Doc?
:'''John''': Yes, sir?
:'''Archie''': Can you leave the light on?
:'''John''': Okay, light stays on.
:'''Archie''': I'll keep these here, okay?
:'''John''': 'Night, Archie.
:'''Archie''': 'Night, Doc. If you want a marshmallow, just gotta ask me, okay?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': Look out, Ava! There's a new Archie in town! Oh, yeah! That feels good! Feel it coming! Feel the burn! Feel the wind! Feel the muscle cramp! Oww! Aah! Oww!
:'''John''': Come on, Archie, don't quit. Dig deep. Let's go!
:'''Archie''': I think I pulled my butt muscle. Ouch. It stings. My butt stings. Could you rub my butt? Could you rub it, please? Rub my butt. Come back here, rub my butt. Please rub my butt.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Doc finally realized he was never gonna make Archie fast enough or strong enough to impress Ava, but maybe, maybe he could make him sweet enough.
:'''Archie''': Wow, how could anybody be so beautiful?
:'''John''': Why don't you tell her that?
:'''Archie''': Oh, I don't know. I... Oh, my... What is that?
:'''John''': Oh, that's Sonny. That's her little &quot;bearfriend.&quot; She told me about him.
:'''Archie''': But he's a Kodiak bear.
:'''John''': Hey, don't get discouraged, man. Listen, you can win her over. The key to winning a woman over is, figure out what she likes. Take my wife.
:'''Archie''': Please!
:'''John''': Don't do that. This is serious.
:'''Archie''': I'm sorry.
:'''John''': My wife, she likes to be surprised.
:'''Archie''': Like jumping out of the bushes, screaming?
:'''John''': No, nothing like that. They like romance. Do something romantic. Something that says, &quot;I'm thinking about you all the time.&quot; You know?
:'''Archie''': Wow, that's really nice. You do stuff like that all the time?
:'''John''': I used to. But lately I've been, you know, all caught up in this, so I guess I'm a little out of practice.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Okay, candles, fruit, cheese, wine. Perfect.
:'''Lisa''': What are you doing?
:'''John''': Oh, hey, honey. I'll tell you what I'm doing. It's all about you tonight, baby. I've sent the children to the movies, and the bear is camping in the woods. We're all alone.
:'''Pepito''': Oh, yes, all alone.
:'''John''': ''[clears throat]'' One second.
:'''Pepito''': No, you cannot see me. I am at one with the couch. I am blended perfectly, interwoven into every fiber. Oops! I can give you some pointers!
:'''John''': So much for the intrusions.
:'''Pepito''': Hey, come on. It ain't no fun if the homeys can't see none.
:'''John''': Now, where were we?
:'''Lisa''': You were thinking candles and wine would make up for ignoring me the last few days.
:'''John''': I'm sensing a little resistance. I took that into consideration. Here's something you won't be able to resist.
:♪♪ ''[Stereo: R&amp;B Ballad]''
:'''Lionel Richie''': ♪ And I feel with you ♪
:''[Lisa chuckles]''
:'''John''': Is this our wedding song?
:♪ In my arms ♪
:'''Lisa''': That's not fair.
:'''John''': Is this the first thing you ever danced to as Mrs. Dolittle?
:''[Lisa laughing]''
:♪ This love will last ♪
:'''Lucky''': The show is about to start.
:♪ Forever ♪
:'''Archie''': What show?
:'''John''': It is! It truly is!
:♪ 'Cause I'm ♪ ♪ Truly ♪
:'''John''': ♪ I'm truly in love ♪
:'''Archie''': ♪ With Mrs. Dolittle ♪
:♪ Truly in love ♪
:''[singing along]''
:'''John''': ♪ Truly in love with you, girl ♪
:♪♪ ''[continues]''
:'''Archie''': Oh, he's so good.
:'''Lucky''': Let me tell ya, he scratched my belly the other day, my leg went crazy.
:♪ Head over heels with your love ♪♪
:'''God Beaver''': Hey, what's going on?
:'''Archie''': Apparently, he's truly, truly in love with her.
:'''Joey''': Hey, Doc, give her some garbage. Chicks like garbage.
:'''John''': How about planting a little sugar on Dr. D's lips?
:'''Lisa''': I think I can do that.
:'''John''': Oh, really?
:'''Lisa''': Mm-hmm.
:'''Lucky''': Go, Doctor! Go, Doctor!
:'''Archie''': D'oh!
:'''Lisa''': Ohh!
:'''Deer''': He broke her! ''[gasps]''
:'''John''': Get outta here, all of you!
:'''God Beaver''': The kid's got moxie.
:'''John''': This ain't no peep show!
:'''Archie''': But this is really helpful. I'm learning a lot. Truly.
:'''John''': Just get out of here. We'll discuss it tomorrow.
:'''Lucky''': Uh-oh. Busted.
:'''Lisa''': You're gonna discuss what tomorrow?
:'''John''': Oh. Well, I w-I was- Well, baby, why don't we just pick it up where we left off.
:'''Lisa''': Baby?
:'''John''': Hmm?
:'''Lisa''': Why don't you sleep on the couch?
:'''Archie''': W-Wait, what'd she say, Doc?
:'''John''': She said she loves me so much, I get to sleep on the couch.
:'''Archie''': You're the man!
:'''John''': Yes, I'm the man. I'm the man on the couch. ''[clears throat]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John snoring, snoring continues]''
:'''Pepito''': Psst. Hey, Doc. Homey is on the move. His hormones are raging.
:''[John continues snoring]''
:'''Pepito''': There he goes!
:'''John''': Hold it.
:'''Eric''': ''[groans]'' I was only going to the bathroom. ''[groans]''
:'''John''': You can hold it. I know that trick.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': ''[chuckling]'' Hey, baby!
:'''Ava''': Hi. What's wrong with your voice?
:'''Archie''': ''[imitating Dolittle]'' You're looking mighty fine. So why don't you plant some of that sugar over here on my-on Archie. ♪ Truly ♪♪
:'''Ava''': ''[laughing]'' Oh, no.
:'''Archie''': Is that our song? ''[creaking]'' Whoa! ''[thud]'' Ow! Hard ground! Back!
:'''Ava''': You should maybe learn how to climb trees. Truly.
:'''Archie''': That's a bruise!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Hey, come on out of there, Archie.
:'''Archie''': Never!
:'''John''': I'm sure it wasn't that bad.
:'''Archie''': It was the most humiliating thing I've ever done, and I once rode a unicycle in a tutu! A tutu!
:'''John''': Okay, I understand, but we can fix this. We just have to work harder.
:'''Archie''': Nope, I'm just gonna stay here and hibernate.
:'''Joey''': Tell him to stay in there. We're making our own bear suit.
:'''John''': No, Archie's fine.
:'''Joey''': Good, 'cause we were wondering, would it be all right if every animal in the whole forest stays with you next week?
:'''John''': Alright, Archie. I'm not playing anymore. You come out here right now, you big coward!
:'''Archie''': Uh, excuse me, who are you calling a coward?
:'''John''': You. I'm calling ''you'' a coward. You're a big coward for quitting like this!
:'''Archie''': Well, it's hard.
:'''John''': You wanna know what &quot;hard&quot; is, Archie? My wife is mad at me, my daughter's mad at me, and I'm spending my vacation with a pizza boy, who greets me by saying &quot;Hey yo, Dr. D, what's up?&quot; Now, I'm standing here listening to a big, furry baby crying, telling me he wants to quit, 'cause it's too hard!
:'''Archie''': ''[whines]'' Well, Ava laughed at me!
:'''John''': ''[mocking Archie]'' &quot;Oh, boo-hoo! Ava laughed at me! I love her, and I need her, and she laughed at me!&quot; You know something, you don't even deserve Ava! Why should Ava have to spend her life with a ''[pokes him]'' coward like you?
:'''Archie''': Hey. Don't poke the bear, buddy.
:'''John''': Oh, I didn't poke a bear, because if I poked a bear, a bear would be mauling me. So, I dunno what I poked, but it sure ain't no bear! ''[pokes him again]''
:'''Archie''': Hey, I'm warning you!
:'''John''': ''[pokes him again]'' Yeah, and I'm poking you!
:'''Archie''': Hey, stop it!
:'''John''': ''[pokes him three times]'' All right, '''poke, poke, poke!'''
:'''Archie''': All right, '''''that's it!!''''' ''[pushes John over the edge]''
:'''John''': Aaah!
:''[he falls off and lands his back in the mud.]''
:'''John''': Archie, that hurt.
:'''Archie''': Whoa, that felt good. Bear-like.
:'''John''': Hey, Archie, you know what? You're beyond my help! You just take your back to the circus!
:'''Archie''': A bear? Whoo-hoo! I'm a bear! I'm the alpha bear! Rawr! RAAWWRRR! Uh, bears say &quot;grr,&quot; right?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': What happened to you?
:'''John''': Archie. I- You know what-
:'''Lisa''': Potter called. He wants to make a deal. Just listen to what he has to say.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': ''[French accent]'' For you, madame.
:'''Ava''': Thanks.
:'''Archie''': So does Sonny bring you fish?
:'''Ava''': No. Not a fish. Usually about a hundred.
:'''Archie''': A hundred? Wait. No. He can't carry that many. Okay, but does Sonny tell you that you have... the most beautiful eyes he's ever seen? Does he promise to fill your life with love, poetry, laughs?
:'''Ava''': No. No. Mostly he just asks me when I think I'll be in heat.
:'''Archie''': ''[chuckles]'' Prince Charming, huh?
:'''Ava''': Yeah.
:'''Archie''': ''[chuckles]'' So when is-when is that?
:'''Ava''': ''[giggles]'' Do you want to go for a walk?
:'''Archie''': With you or alone?
:'''Ava''': With me.
:'''Archie''': Okay. ''[chuckles]''
:''[Ava giggles]''
:'''Archie''': This isn't a walk. We're running. Why do we always have to run?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Yep, there was love in the air.
:'''Lucky''': Be the man. Be the man. Be... the... man. Hey. Now, you listen to me. Yeah, that's right. You're in my house now.
:'''Wolf''': Hmm?
:'''Lucky''': Yeah, my house. Also my house. All of these are my houses. Hey, you're a lucky girl, you know that? Yeah. You're the lucky one, not me. You. ''[chuckles]'' Hey. You want to go out with me tonight? Would that be good?
:'''White Wolf''': Hey, wait a minute. What do you think you're doing?
:'''Lucky''': Who-Who-Who, me? No. I'm not doing anything. I'm just, you know, assuming the position.
:'''White Wolf''': Hey. You marked my tree.
:'''Lucky''': Oh, no. I would never do that. I would never mark-- mark your tree. I don't even know what those words mean. I drank a lot of water. I'll tell you something about water. It goes right through me.
:'''White Wolf''': Come on. It smells like lemonade.
:'''Lucky''': Oh. Yeah. Oh, I see your point. Yeah, yours is... very, very strong. It's like-like ammonia. I'm actually getting dizzy, to tell you the truth.
:'''White Wolf''': Come on. Let's beat it. We're leaving.
:'''Lucky''': You two are going, huh? Have fun. You two are going, huh? Have fun. Have fun. You make a very handsome couple. ''[chuckles]'' God, I hate myself.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[bees buzzing]''
:'''Archie''': Wow.
:'''Ava''': Yeah. Bears have died trying to reach that hive.
:'''Archie''': Well, if you want it, you got it.
:'''Ava''': Oh, please. Don't even think about it. That's not funny.
:'''Archie''': No. I'm gonna go get it for you.
:'''Ava''': Archie, I'm serious. Don't. it's too dangerous. Promise me.
:'''Archie''': Okay. Okay. I like you, Ava.
:'''Ava''': I like you too, Archie.
:'''Sonny''': What are you girls doing over here?
:'''Ava''': Sonny, don't.
:'''Sonny''': Beat it, circus boy.
:'''Ava''': Sonny...
:'''Sonny''': Oh, you keep your yap shut.
:'''Archie''': ''[chuckles]'' Your charm is matched only by your odor.
:'''Sonny''': And what does that mean?
:'''Archie''': You're a malodorous ignoramus. It's nothing, really.
:'''Sonny''': What's he saying? I'm confused. And I don't like being confused.
:'''Ava''': Yeah, he really doesn't.
:'''Archie''': Really? Well, you'd think he'd get used to it, huh?
:'''Sonny''': Let's go, Ava. Trying to confuse me. ''[mumbling]''
:'''Archie''': Ava, don't go. Look, maybe you can do better than me, but don't do worse. I thought you liked me.
:'''Ava''': Of course I do.
:'''Sonny''': Come on, Ava.
:'''Ava''': But you'll always be a city bear. And I need more than that.
:'''Archie''': City bear. ''[sighs]'' Great.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Joe Potter''': Should we, uh, put all our cards on the table?
:'''Jack Riley''': Of course.
:'''Joe Potter''': This bear you brought up here has as much likelihood of making... little bear babies as Riley here. Ain't-a-gonna happen. But, on the other hand, thanks to you, I'm not exactly drowning in favorable publicity. So, here's my offer. I will set aside ten acres, turn it into a sanctuary. You can bring all your little animal buddies there. Plus, you'll be saving face. You won't have to admit you failed. You don't look like a fool.
:'''John''': Look, ten acres is ridiculous.
:'''Joe Potter''': That's the offer.
:'''Jack Riley''': The deadline is Wednesday at 12:00 noon. Let me be clear. At 12:01, we'll be sending in every logger, every piece of logging equipment we've got. By Friday, there won't be a tree standing.
:'''John''': ''[sighs]'' I need to run this by my wife.
:'''Jack Riley''': Excellent idea. There's a pay phone in the back.
:'''John''': Excuse me.
:'''Jack Riley''': Calling the wife. Always a sign of weakness.
:'''Joe Potter''': Yeah.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': Whoo-hoo, woo, woo. Hey, Johnny.
:'''John''': What are you doing?
:'''Archie''': Doc, I know what to do. I've got my big finish.
:'''John''': Look. Come in here. Quick.
:'''Archie''': All right. Hey, I don't think I'm allowed in here.
:'''John''': Okay, listen. I got to tell you. This thing is over.
:'''Archie''': I'm just sorry I dragged you into all this.
:'''John''': I'm going to have to get you an audition in Vegas or something. These guys offered me a deal, and it's the best I can do.
:'''Archie''': No, no, no. The best you can do is not give up on me, Doc. Come on. You told me, &quot;Listen to your inner bear.&quot; Remember?
:'''John''': I don't know, Archie.
:'''Archie''': Look, I know how I can win Ava.
:'''John''': Okay. I know I'm nuts or something. I'm gonna give it another shot. I'll give you one more chance.
:'''Archie''': Yes! Yes!
:'''John''': Okay, let me get over...
:'''Archie''': Uh-oh. Uh-oh!
:'''John''': What do you mean &quot;uh-oh?&quot;
:'''Archie''': Ice cream's acting up.
:'''John''': What ice cream?
:'''Archie''': After Sonny took Ava, I got depressed, and went on a bender. And on the second gallon, I realize, that I'm in love with Ava, and this ice cream called &quot;Cherry Garcia&quot;. ''[belches]''
:'''John''': Hey, don't you dare throw up on me!
:'''Archie''': ''[groans]'' That's not where it's gonna come out! ''[groans]''
:'''John''': Wait, wait, wait, hold on! If you have to do that, then sit on the toilet!
:'''Archie''': I can't hold it!
:'''John''': Wait! You gotta lift the lid up first.
:'''Archie''': This is not going to be big enough! Oh, boy!
:'''John''': You'll be fine. Just sit there. I'm gonna keep guard outside.
:'''Archie''': I don't think it's...
:'''John''': Take care of what you got to take care. Hey. I'll be with you in one second. I'm gonna take care of business.
:'''Jack Riley''': Who you talking to in there?
:'''John''': I'm talking to myself. I was- Sometimes you got to coax it down.
:'''Jack Riley''': Right.
:'''John''': Give my sphincter a little pep talk. Excuse me. Come on down, you.
:'''Archie''': Oh, my G...
:'''John''': I gotta stay in here with you. Let me get the window open. Don't do nothing till I get the window open.
:'''Archie''': Uh-oh!
:'''John''': The window only opens a little bit. That's not going to be enough.
:''[Archie breaking wind]''
:'''John''': Oh, hey, hey! You're doing it, aren't you? Wow!
:'''Archie''': Whoo-hoo-hoo! ''[Breaking Wind]''
:'''John''': It's worse than I imagined.
:'''Archie''': ''[breaking wind]'' Whoo! [breaking wind]''
:'''John''': Ohh! Ohh! Oh, Archie! You just had ice cream? That's not just ice cream. Oh, Archie!
:'''Archie''': ''[breaks wind]'' Oh, it ain't that bad. Come on. Whoo!
:''[toilet flushing]''
:'''John''': Gentlemen, uh, no deal. Thanks for your time.
:'''Seeing-Eye Dog''': ''[sniffs]'' ''[snores]'' Hmm! Is that me?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Maya''': Can you hear me?
:'''Pepito''': Stop staring at me. You're giving me a complex. I'm trying to blend.
:'''Maya''': Well, if you can hear me, can you change to the color of this table...
:'''Charisse''': What do you think you're doing?
:'''Maya''': I think he understands me.
:'''Charisse''': Well, if he understood me, I'd tell him how sick I am of all these stupid animals.
:'''Pepito''': ''[gasps]'' Oh, that really hurt. If you could understand me, I'd tell you to do something about your dandruff flakes. It's looking like Christmas in July.
:'''Charisse''': I hate this place.
:'''Pepito''': So young. So angry. Damn that rap music.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Hey.
:'''John''': Hey.
:'''Lisa''': So how'd it go?
:'''John''': Well, I told Potter no deal.
:'''Lisa''': I thought it wasn't working with Archie.
:'''John''': Archie thinks he can win Ava over. I'm gonna see this through.
:'''Charisse''': So that means we're stuck here? Oh!
:'''Lisa''': Charisse.
:'''John''': Hey, Charisse. Hey. Charisse. Hey, it's a long walk back to the city. Hey, we're not getting along too good, are we?
:'''Charisse''': I wanna go home.
:'''John''': I wanna go home too. We're going home. But there's something else that's bothering you, isn't it? I'm not saying it's all your fault. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe it's a phase you're going through. But something's bothering you. Your mother thinks you got a problem, and you're not telling us about it.
:'''Charisse''': No.
:'''John''': You sure? There's nothing bothering you?
:'''Charisse''': I'm sure.
:'''John''': Charisse.
:'''Charisse''': I'm sure.
:'''John''': Charisse.
:'''Charisse''': I'm fine, Dad.
:'''John''': Okay, now. I'm not saying you have a problem, but if you do we always work things out. Right?
:'''Charisse''': Right.
:'''John''': You're cool?
:'''Charisse''': Cool.
:'''John''': All right. 'Cause your mother was a little worried. And I was starting-
:'''Charisse''': Tell her I'm fine.
:'''John''': Okay. Okay. Yeah.
:'''Charisse''': Dad?
:'''John''': Yes? Yes? I knew something was bothering you. What is it? Come on, talk to me. You know, daddy to daughter. Break it down. You can cry, whatever. We can cry together, if that's- What is it?
:'''Charisse''': Nothing.
:'''John''': Stop.
:'''Charisse''': It must be the mountains messing me up, 'cause I'm fine.
:'''John''': You sure you're all right?
:'''Charisse''': Mm-hmm. ''[giggles]''
:'''John''': She's all right! You have your little space. I'll be in the house.
:'''Charisse''': All right.
:'''John''': Okay.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': Talking time's done. It's time to be bold for Ava.
:'''Hawk''': He's going after the hive! He's going after the hive!
:'''Owl''':[Hooting]?
:'''Porcupine''': Archie.
:'''Owl''': Who?
:'''Joey''': Archie, you idiot. Jeez!
:'''Archie''': Boy, this cliff's a lot higher than I remember.
:'''Jack Riley''': Bye-bye, species.
:'''John''': So this is your big plan? Archie, you get back here right now! Come back in!
:'''Archie''': No way, Doc. I'm gonna do this or die trying.
:'''Possum''': That bear is one bad mother.
:'''John''': Archie, what are you doing? Archie, you get back in here right now. Stop playing!
:'''Archie''': I don't think I'm gonna win Ava by eating a bunch of worms. I'm never gonna be more woodsy than Sonny. I have to show her how much she means to me.
:'''John''': Yeah, and if you fall, it's gonna prove that you're stupid and dead, Archie.
:'''Sonny''': What's going on around here? Oh, circus boy's got a new trick.
:'''Ava''': Quiet, Sonny.
:'''Archie''': Okay, I got it. I got it.
:'''Beaver''': That log ain't gonna hold him. And I know logs.
:''[log creaking]''
:'''Archie''': Okay! Ohh!
:'''John''': Don't move, Archie! Don't move!
:'''Ava''': Careful! Careful!
:'''Joey''': I'll buy you the honey.
:'''Archie''': Ooh! Ooh!
:'''John''': Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa!
:'''Jack Riley''': Break! Break!
:'''Archie''': This is not a good idea.
:'''Ava''': Archie, get down!
:'''Archie''': I'm fine. Oh, bees!
:''[bees buzzing]''
:'''John''': What's happening? Hold still! I'll try to talk to them. Work something out. Don't you move.
:'''Archie''': They're stinging me! No, no!
:'''John''': Uh, guys, uh-
:''[Bees buzzing]''
:'''Archie''': I can't see! Ooh! They're stinging! Get away from me!
:'''Bees''': Attack!
:'''John''': No, no, no! No attack! Hey! Stop!
:'''Bee #1''': Defend the hive!
:'''John''': Ow! Hey, Archie!
:'''Bee #1''': Get the little guy!
:''[Bee #2 yelling]''
:''[Jack Riley gasps]''
:'''Bee #1''': Protect the hive! Attack!
:'''Bee #2''': Attack!
:'''Bees''': Banzai! Banzai!
:'''John''': Archie! Archie! Hey, Archie! Hey! ''[grunting]''
:''[Archie yelling]''
:'''Ava''': Archie!
:'''John''': Archie, get back in here!
:'''Sonny''': Jump, circus boy!
:'''Ava''': Go suck a salmon!
:'''Archie''': Ava, I did it for you!
:'''Joey''': Good job, Archie! Way to go, Archie! All right!
:'''Squirrel''': Yeah! He did it!
:'''Porcupine''': Woo! Woo! Woo!
:'''Possum''': Yeah.
:'''Beaver''': That kid's got moxie. I love him.
:'''John''': Okay. Okay, what's the matter with you, huh? What'd you do something like that for, huh? Are you crazy?
:'''Sonny''': I could have got that hive if I wanted it. Come on, Ava, before I get mad.
:'''Ava''': Sonny, we're not working out. So, take a hike.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ava''': Honey?
:'''Archie''': Yeah, babe, what's up?
:'''Ava''': No. I meant, would you like more honey?
:'''Archie''': Oh, no. I'm good.
:'''Ava''': Okay.
:'''Archie''': So, ready to talk about preserving the species?
:'''Ava''': Well, we could talk. Or you could count to a hundred and come and get me.
:'''Archie''': Okay. Counting, great. Um, one, two...
:''[Ava giggling]''
:'''Archie''': One, two, three-
:'''Ava''': Impressive. He's really counting.
:'''Archie''': Come on, focus, focus. Uh, one-
:'''Ava''': Maybe I should stay in the open.
:'''Archie''': One, two, ten, G, H, P, green, orange, fish.
:'''Ava''': Pace yourself. Not so fast.
:'''Archie''': Uh, one, two, three, ten... Uh, five-teen. Okay, 100. Ow! What the-Nap. ''[thud]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Maya''': Daddy?
:'''John''': Hey.
:'''Maya''': Daddy's back.
:'''Lisa''': What is it? What happened?
:'''John''': It's Archie.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Man''': Back up, back up.
:'''Eugene''': Okay, folks, let's move it back now. We got a wild animal, coming through. Wild animal, coming through. I know you've all seen the show When Animals Attack. Have you seen When Animals Wake Up and Attack? Now, there's nothing more dangerous... than a half-sedated, half-unsedated bear. They have big, sharp teeth and claws-
:'''John''': Excuse me. I'm Dr. Dolittle. What happened in here?
:'''Eugene''': Well, he broke down the back door, and we found him ransacking the kitchen.
:'''John''': No.
:'''Eugene''': I'm sorry, Dr. Dolittle. I was rooting for you. All right, let's move it out! Show's over! Let's go!
:'''John''': Hey, Archie, it's me. What happened?
:'''Archie''': ''[groggy]'' Hey. I was so close, Doc. They came out of nowhere. And I... Are you ready to save the forest? ''[mumbles]''
:'''Jack Riley''': The good news is, we're setting aside ten acres of forest. We're calling it the Dr. Dolittle Wildlife Sanctuary. We're very pleased about that. Ah, speak of the devil.
:'''Man''': Can we ask you a few questions?
:'''John''': You think you won this thing, but you haven't.
:'''Jack Riley''': Fine. We'll just level your forest and call it a tie. Thanks very much, folks. That's it for today. Thank you.
:''[Reporters shouting questions]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': If only I had an eyewitness. Did anybody see what happened?
:'''God Beaver''': Yeah. We got one problem. He's a frigging weasel.
:'''John''': Oh, really. What'd he do?
:'''God Beaver''': I mean he's an actual frigging weasel. Hey, weasel, the doctor's here.
:'''Lennie''': Okay, you know what, that's Mr. Weasel.
:'''John''': Mr. Weasel, did you see what happened to the bear?
:'''Lennie''': Ooh, the big scary bear. Did I see what happened-
:'''John''': Did you see anything or not?
:'''Lennie''': Okay, here's the deal. Give me that shiny wristwatch of yours, and I'll tell you what you need to know.
:'''John''': You're such a weasel.
:'''Lennie''': Oh, thank you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Potter's people set Archie up. I got a witness.
:'''Lisa''': An animal? You can't offer that into evidence.
:'''John''': Well, you got any better ideas?
:'''Lisa''': Well, I-I'll stall for time. Maybe we'll get a private investigator.
:'''John''': Those trucks are ready to roll. They're taking Archie to a zoo in Mexico.
:'''Lisa''': John, if you go on the witness stand, Riley is gonna tear you to shreds.
:'''John''': Well, what do I have to lose?
:'''Lisa''': Your reputation.
:'''John''': Look, I don't care. I'm not giving up on those animals this easy. Not without a fight. Excuse me.
:''[Lisa sighs]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Your Honor, we admit it was a setback. But we would like one more week to rehabilitate the bear.
:'''Jack Riley''': Might I suggest perhaps counsel would like to, uh, admit the animal into the Betty Ford clinic.
:''[Spectators laughing]''
:'''Jack Riley''': Or the Yogi Bear clinic.
:'''Lisa''': What if I could prove the entire thing was a setup?
:'''Judge B. Duff''': That would be a very serious allegation. Do you intend to present evidence?
:'''Lisa''': We have an eyewitness.
:'''John''': Your Honor, can I address the court, just for a minute?
:'''Judge B. Duff''': Go ahead.
:'''John''': Sir, we have an eyewitness who'll testify that they heard a gunshot, then they saw a truck backing up to the area where the shot was fired.
:'''Judge B. Duff''': Is that witness in the courtroom?
:'''John''': No. Not in the courtroom with us, because, um, he's, uh- He's a weasel.
:''[spectators laughing, gavel pounding, spectators laughing continues]''
:'''Judge B. Duff''': Order!
:'''John''': Your Honor, I know this-this seems very unreasonable. But I can talk to animals. One of them did come forward with this information.
:'''Jack Riley''': Your Honor, if it pleases the court, I have no problem allowing Dr. Dolittle or counsel the opportunity to question the eyewitness. I would just ask for a brief recess so that I have opportunity to get a camera. I'd like a snapshot of the animal being sworn in.
:''[spectators laughing]''
:'''Judge B. Duff''': That's enough!
:'''Jack Riley''': Does the weasel need immunity? We could provide animal protection program.
:''[spectators laughing continues]''
:''[gavel pounding]''
:'''Judge B. Duff''': That's enough. I will not allow you to make a mockery of my courtroom. The deadline has passed. Motion to extend denied.
:'''Jack Riley''': That's a shame. You hate to see it.
:''[Joe Potter laughing]''
:'''Reporter #1''': Uh, Dr. Dolittle, will you appeal?
:'''Reporter #2''': Is this the end of the line?
:'''Reporter #1''': Dr. Dolittle, can you tell us what the weasel said?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archie''': Hey. Hey, Doc. Okay. Come to get me out?
:'''John''': Sort of.
:'''Archie''': Sort of? What do you mean, sort of?
:'''John''': I couldn't really prove your story, Archie. So they, um...
:'''Archie''': What? They wh-what? They what?
:'''John''': They think you're too dangerous to be set free, so- ''[Inhales]''
:'''Archie''': Yeah? What?
:'''John''': ''[exhales]'' They sold you to a Mexican circus.
:'''Archie''': Ai, Chihuahua.
:'''John''': Archie, I am- I'm so sorry.
:'''Archie''': For what?
:'''John''': For everything. Dragging you out here and putting you through all this stuff. Giving you hope. I feel like I ruined your life.
:'''Archie''': Ruined my life? Doc, you gave me a life. You're the one who taught me about love. And no one can ever take that away from me.
:'''John''': Hey, Charisse. What are you doing down here?
:'''Charisse''': Mom wanted me to tell you that her motion for an appeal has been denied.
:'''John''': Well, we knew it was a long shot anyway. So, Archie, at least you'll be back in show business.
:'''Archie''': Ehh, that's not what I want anymore. I just want Ava.
:'''John''': I know you want Ava.
:''[During Archie's detention, as John and Charisse visit him.]''
:'''Archie''': Looks like I wasn't meant to be loved.
:'''Charisse''': Everyone's meant to be loved.
:'''John''': That's right. Everyone's meant to- ''[caught by surprise at Charisse's newfound ability]'' Charisse. Oh, my God! Charisse, since when?
:'''Charisse''': A couple of weeks now. At first, it was kind of fuzzy. But, uh, now it's really clear.
:'''John''': And this is what you've been keeping from us, right?
:'''Charisse''': I didn't want to say anything because I didn't want to become a freak.
:'''John''': You're not going to become a freak. Not at all. Hey, look. When it started happening to me, I got scared too. You're just looking at it the wrong way. This is a good thing.
:'''Charisse''': How?
:'''John''': Look at all the good that's come out of it already.
:'''Charisse''': What good?
:'''John''': Well, look at us, like this, huh? How about this, huh? Mm.
:'''Archie''': Hey, guys. Now I know what I've been missing. A family. I guess that's something I'll never have.
:'''Charisse''': Dad, you got to help him. Isn't there something that we can do? And it's not just him. It's all the animals. There's so many of 'em.
:'''John''': Yeah, there are so many of 'em.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[forest animals chattering]''
:'''John''': You guys have given up, haven't you?
:'''God Beaver''': Hey, what am I gonna do? I'm six years old. I'm not a young beaver no more. Besides, we've been living in this forest how long?
:'''Joey''': About a hundred years we've been shaking down this forest, boss.
:'''God Beaver''': So we had a good run.
:'''John''': Look, I tried to do this by myself, but I can't. So if you guys want to save your homes, you're gonna have to help me. And whether or not you believe it, you guys have enormous untapped power.
:''[Drunk Monkey blows raspberry]''
:'''John''': When people talk about the best of the best, it's always an animal expression. You got a heart like a lion. Or he's as strong as an ox. He's got eyes like an eagle. Or he can move swift like a gazelle. Or you stink like a skunk.
:'''Skunk''': What?
:'''John''': Sorry about that, man. I'm trying to make my point. What I'm trying to say is, we can do this! We can do it! Just don't give up without a fight!
:'''God Beaver''': Let the word go out from Sicily to SeaWorld. The trucks don't move! Capisce?
:'''John''': Yeah! All right!
:'''Forest Animals''': The beaver's right! Got it! ''[cheering]''
:'''John''': Yeah! Yeah!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[horn honks]''
:'''Logger''': Hey, kids! I'm gonna have to ask you to move!
:'''Charisse''': No!
:'''Logger''': No? Listen, don't start with me.
:'''Charisse''': Everybody, take your positions!
:''[wolves growling, barking]''
:'''White Wolf''': Hasta la vista, baby.
:'''Logger''': Shoot! Roll 'em up!
:''[wolves growling, barking continues]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cow Worker #2''': I ain't never seen nothing like this before.
:'''Cow Worker #1''': None of 'em have any milk.
:'''Cow Worker #2''': What?
:'''Cow Worker #1''': All of 'em are dry.
:'''Cow Worker #2''': What's wrong, Annabelle?
:'''Annabelle''': Strike! Strike!
:'''All''': Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
:'''Hen''': Here's your eggs! You want 'em scrambled?
:'''Hens''': Strike! Strike! Strike!
:'''Man''': Okay. Let's go get the Frisbee. Come on, go get it!
:'''Man''': D'oh!
:'''Dalmatian''': Strike! Strike! Strike!
:'''Man''': Give me-Give me- Give me that leash!
:'''Dog''': Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
:'''Boy''': Oh, no!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:♪♪ ''[Blues]''
:'''Pigeon''': Hey, Archie. All the animals are working together. You'll be out of here in no time.
:'''Joe Potter''': It's ridiculous. Animals can't organize.
:'''Jack Riley''': You may want to take a look at this for yourself then.
:'''Man on TV''': All over the world, animals have organized. They're striking in Paris, Texas, in Paris, France, in Brooklyn, in Mexico and in Canada.
:'''Jack Riley''': I'm sure I'm going to regret this in the morning, but maybe you should talk with Dolittle.
:'''Joe Potter''': And what? Give in to a bunch of beasts and lower life-forms? I took on the Democrats. I can take on a bunch of animals.
:''[mouse squeaking]''
:'''Mouse''': Charge!
:'''Joe Potter''': Oh, no!
:''[mouse squeaking]''
:''[Jack Riley gasps]''
:'''Joe Potter''': Go on!
:'''Mouse''': Look out!
:'''Mouse''': Watch it!
:'''Joe Potter''': Beat it. Ha!
:'''Mouse''': Retreat!
:'''Joe Potter''': Go on!
:'''Mouse''': Medic!
:'''Joe Potter''': Organized.
:'''Male Pigeon #1''': We have two bogeys, bearing Alpha Tango Niner.
:''[bird cawing]''
:'''Male Pigeon #2''': We are locked on targets.
:'''Joe Potter''': Do you hear something?
:'''Male Pigeon #1''': Commence bombing!
:''[bird cawing]''
:'''Male Pigeon #2''': Roger that, sir.
:'''Male Pigeon #1''': Well done, men! I got your wing, man! The party ain't over yet!
:''[wolf growling]''
:'''Jack Riley''': Sir?
:'''Joe Potter''': Don't make any sudden moves.
:'''Jack Riley''': Gotcha.
:''[wolf growling, barking]''
:''[Joe Potter yelling]''
:'''Male Pigeon #1''': Attack! Back 'em up! Poop's away! Firing number two! Let's return to base and reload.
:'''Jack Riley''': Sir, you, uh, you-you've locked the, uh-
:'''Joe Potter''': What?
:'''Jack Riley''': You've locked the door, sir!
:'''Joe Potter''': What?
:'''Jack Riley''': You might want to-- Sir!
:'''Joe Potter''': I think you should run. Run!
:'''Jack Riley''': I'm an attorney. I'm not with him.
:'''Bee''': There he is again! Get the little guy! Banzai!
:'''Jack Riley''': Not the face!
:''[Joe Potter chuckling, gasps]''
:''[Sonny roars]''
:'''Joe Potter''': No, please! No, no. I'm sure we can work something out. I'm just reaching for my phone. I'm gonna call Dr. Dolittle.
:'''Joey''': Whoa, whoa. No sudden movements, or I'm gonna bite you in the cannolis
:'''Joe Potter''': Uh, hello. The number for Dr. John Dolittle, please. Not Stuart Little. Dolittle.
:''[phone rings]''
:'''John''': Dolittle. Oh, Mr. Potter. How are you, sir?
:'''Joe Potter''': Oh, I could be better. I'm here with a couple of your friends.
:'''John''': I know you can't possibly believe that animals are organizing.
:'''Joe Potter''': Uh, well, you know, I don't know what to think anymore.
:'''John''': Tell you what. Let's put our cards on the table. I will be more than happy to set up a meeting between you and these animals... so you can work out your problem.
:'''Joe Potter''': What?
:'''John''': Hey, look. it's the only way you're gonna be able to save face. You won't have to admit you were wrong, and you can get out without looking like an idiot.
:'''Joe Potter''': Okay, okay. Look, anything. Just-Just call them off.
:'''John''': Okay. All right, listen, put the raccoon on the phone.
:'''Joe Potter''': He wants to speak to you. Make it short.
:'''Joey''': ''[clears throat]'' Hello. Yeah. No, no. I got it under control. Hey, we'll call youse back.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': All right. First off, let me say that I'm here only as a mediator. And these negotiations will be between Mr. Potter... and the representatives of the United Animals of the Forest, local 534.
:'''Possum''': Yeah. Let's come to order.
:'''Joe Potter''': This is my new proposal.
:'''John''': All right.
:'''Joey''': What's the stipulations, Doc? What kind of territory are we looking at?
:'''John''': It's only, uh, 12 acres here. It's 12 acres.
:'''Joey''': I got your 12 acres right here, pal.
:'''Joe Potter''': Hey, they like it.
:'''Joey''': I'll give you something you like. Like this. ''[urinating]''
:'''John''': I think that's a &quot;no.&quot; Or &quot;hell no,&quot; maybe.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Meanwhile, the strike kept growing. Even the pros were getting in on the act.
:'''Man on P.A.''': The last few runners left to load now for one of the biggest spectacles of the year: It's Derby time. Last horse is in. Gate's closed. And away they go!
:'''Horses''': Hell, no! We won't go! Hell, no! We won't go! Hell, no! We won't go!
:'''Horse Jockey''': Run your own stupid race!
:'''Horse''': You try running a mile. Don't even think about reaching for that whip, shorty.
:'''Shamu Trainer''': Ladies and gentlemen, Shamu!
:''[audience cheering, applause]''
:'''Shamu Trainer''': This is Shamu!
:''[audience muttering]''
:'''Shamu''': Nah. I don't feel like jumping through any hoops today. Any of you guys?
:'''Killer Whale #1''': Uh-uh.
:'''Killer Whale #2''': No, no. Not today. I just ate. Uh-uh.
:'''John''': Mr. Potter, I hope we have a deal now.
:'''Possum''': All right!
:'''Joey''': Yeah! Good job. Taught him everything he knows.
:'''Drunk Monkey''': Vive le bear! Vive le Archie! Vive le docteur! ''[hiccups]''
:'''Archie''': Come on, give me a bear hug. Come on!
:'''John''': Oh, no. Absolutely not, Archie.
:'''Archie''': You're not leaving here until you get a bear hug.
:'''John''': All right, give me a hug then. just a little one.
:'''Archie''': Come on.
:'''John''': Okay. All right. That's good. Archie-- ''[gagging]'' Archie! Archie, you're crushing my spine. ''[gasping]'' Archie!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Squirrel''': Bye-bye. Drive safe now. Buckle up.
:'''John''': Hey, Archie, you in there?
:'''Archie''': What? Hey, Doc.
:'''John''': Man, I just stopped by to say so long.
:'''Archie''': Oh. Thanks. For everything.
:'''John''': You are quite welcome.
:'''Ava''': Archie, I'm ready.
:'''Archie''': She's in heat. Excuse me, Doc. I got to go save the species. ''[chuckles]''
:'''John''': Oh. Go do your thing, Archie. Yeah, Archie. Archie! ''[chuckles]'' Oh, Archie.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' Yeah, it was quite a summer.
:'''Lucky''': Hey, Doc.
:'''John''': Hey, Lucky. What are you doing?
:'''Lucky''': What am I doing? Hmm. Let me phrase it this way. ''[clears throat, howling]''
:''[wolf howling continues]''
:'''John''': You too, huh?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' And Charisse and the Doc were closer than ever.
:'''Charisse''': Oh, come on. Cheer up, Pepito. You'll get it eventually.
:'''Pepito''': No, I won't. I will never blend in. I have a broken blender.
:'''Charisse''': You will blend in. Trust me. You will blend in.
:'''Pepito''': How? How will Pepito ever blend in? Pepito sucks. ''[gasps]'' Look at me! I'm blending in! I'm invisible!
:'''John''': That's right. You're invisible. Great job, honey.
:'''Pepito''': Did you ever doubt me? The blendmaster is back.
:'''John''': How about that?
:'''Pepito''': I am king of the third world. Hey, can we do the whole house like this? Is very feng shui.
:'''Lucky''': ''[narrating]'' But the best news of all came the following spring.
:'''Boy Bear Cub''': No, you don't know what you're talking about.
:'''Archie''': Kids, come on- Hey! Ooh! Over here! Kids! Whoo-hoo! Over here! Okay. Now, it's step, step, turn, kick, step.
:'''Girl Bear Cub''': Papa, I thought it was step, kick, turn, step, step.
:'''Archie''': Come on, kids. We open in six weeks.
:'''Ava''': I thought you retired.
:'''Archie''': Oh. ''[chuckles]'' I did, honey. We're just playing. Okay, now from the chorus. Five, six, seven, eight...
:'''All''': ♪ I will survive I will survive ♪ ♪ For as long as I know how to love ♪ ♪ I know I'll stay alive ♪
:'''Archie''': ♪ I've got all my life to live ♪ ♪ I've got all my love to give ♪ ♪ And I'll survive I will survive ♪ ♪ Hey, yeah ♪♪
:''[fades]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines]''
:'''Pepito''': Hey, come on. This is the most boring party I've ever been to. You guys are so stiff, so plastic. Come on, let's move! Let's conga. Hey, baby, are those real? Come on, let's get this party started. Let's go! Ooy! Ooy! Party over here, party over there! Raise the roof. The roof is on fire.
:''[blender whirring]''
:'''Pepito''': Can you see me now? I bet you can't. I'm invisible. Can you see me?
:'''Drunk Monkey''': Of course. I see both of you. ''[laughs, hiccups]'' ♪ There's a place in France ♪ ♪ Where the naked monkeys dance ♪ ''[hiccups]''

== Taglines ==
* Dolittle is back.
* The doctor is in again.
* The doctor makes house calls.
* The doctor is back!

==Cast==
* [[Eddie Murphy]] - Dr. John Dolittle
* [[w:Kristen Wilson|Kristen Wilson]] - Lisa Dolittle
* [[w:Jeffrey Jones|Jeffrey Jones]] - Joe Potter
* [[w:Kevin Pollak|Kevin Pollak]] - Jack Riley
* [[w:Raven-Symoné|Raven-Symoné]] - Charisse Dolittle
* [[w:Kyla Pratt|Kyla Pratt]] - Maya Dolittle
* [[w:Lil Zane|Lil Zane]] - Eric (Charisse's Boyfriend)
* [[w:James Avery|James Avery]] - Eldon
* Elayn J. Taylor - Eldon's wife
* [[w:Andy Richter|Andy Richter]] - Eugene Wilson
* [[w:Mark Griffin (actor)|Mark Griffin]] - Logger / Nature Show Narrator
* [[w:Ken Hudson Campbell|Ken Hudson Campbell]] - Animal Control Officer
* [[w:Victor Raider-Wexler|Victor Raider-Wexler]] - Judge B. Duff
* [[Steve Irwin]] - The Crocodile Hunter
* [[w:Anne Stedman|Anne Stedman]] - Woman
* Googy Gress - Bear Announcer
* [[w:Trevor Denman|Trevor Denman]] - Horse Race Announcer
* Lisa Marie Hugueley - Shamu Trainer
* [[w:Lawrence Pressman|Lawrence Pressman]] - Governor of California (''uncredited'')

==Animal voice talent==
* [[w:Steve Zahn|Steve Zahn]] - Archie
* [[Norm Macdonald]] - Lucky ''(uncredited)''
* [[Lisa Kudrow]] - Ava
* [[Mike Epps]] - Sonny
* [[w:Jacob Vergas|Jacob Vargas]] - Pepito
* [[w:Richard C. Sarafian|Richard C. Sarafian]] - God Beaver
* [[w:Michael Rapaport|Michael Rapaport]] - Joey
* [[w:Philip Proctor|Phil Proctor]] - Drunk Monkey
* [[w:Issac Hates|Isaac Hayes]] - Possum
* [[w:Andy Dick|Andy Dick]] - Mr. &quot;Lennie&quot; Weasel
* [[w:John Witherspoon (actor)|John Witherspoon]] - Old Zoo Bear
* [[Cedric the Entertainer]] - Young Zoo Bear
* [[w:Jamie Kennedy|Jamie Kennedy]], [[David Cross]], [[w:Ken Hudson Campbell|Ken Hudson Campbell]] &amp; [[w:Bob Odenkirk|Bob Odenkirk]] - Dogs
* Maria Arcé &amp; Melique Berger - Fish
* [[w:David DeLeise|David DeLuise]] &amp; [[w:Hal Sparks|Hal Sparks]] - School of Fish
* [[w:Reni Santoni|Reni Santoni]] - Rat #1
* [[John Leguizamo]] - Rat #2 ''(uncredited)''
* [[w:Kevin Pollak|Kevin Pollak]] - Alligator
* [[w:Georgia Engel|Georgia Engel]] - Giraffe
* [[w:Joey Lauren Adams|Joey Lauren Adams]] - Squirrel
* [[w:Mandy Moore|Mandy Moore]] - Girl Bear Cub
* [[w:Frankie Muniz|Frankie Muniz]] - Boy Bear Cub
* [[w:Michael McKean|Michael McKean]] &amp; [[w:David Lander|David L. Lander]] - Birds
* [[Tom Kenny]] - Male Tortoise
* [[w:Renée Taylor|Renée Taylor]] - Female Tortoise
* Jamie Kennedy - Bandit
* [[w:Keone Young|Keone Young]] &amp; [[w:Clyde Kusatsu|Clyde Kusatsu]] - Bees
* Tara Mercurio - Deer
* [[John DiMaggio]] - Seeing-Eye Dog, Wassup Fish, Mouse
* Jamie Kennedy, David Cross, Ken Hudson Campbell &amp; Bob Odenkirk - Animal Groupies
* Ken Hudson Campbell, Jamie Kennedy &amp; Bob Odenkirk - Forest Animals
* [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] - White Wolf ''(uncredited)''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0240462|title=Dr. Dolittle 2}}

[[Category:2001 American films]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:Medical films]]
[[Category:Films about dogs]]
[[Category:Films about bears]]
[[Category:Films about raccoons]]
[[Category:Films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Films directed by Steve Carr]]
[[Category:Films about animal rights]]


{{film-stub}}</text>
      <sha1>2e3pa2xsrgo3qey0sietw04s7y8cg4a</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>18803</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964952</id>
      <parentid>3919521</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:17:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964952</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10259" sha1="ggj64cfrdoy4c1sud9089yuv74kqrqy" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines|Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines]]''''' is a 2003 film, the third film in the [[Terminator]] series quadrilogy. It deals with an adult [[:w:John Connor|John Connor]] meeting his future wife and second-in-command, Kate Brewster, and the revelation that despite everything he and his mother have done over the course of his entire life and before, the war against machines is, in actuality, inevitable.

Meanwhile, the machines launch one last bid against the human resistance, sending a new Terminator to kill Connor and Brewster's lieutenants while initiating the final steps towards SkyNet's achievement of self-awareness, and starting the war.

''Directed by Jonathan Mostow. Screenplay by Jon Brancato and Michael Ferris.''
{{center|'''The Machines Will Rise.'''&lt;small&gt;([[#Taglines|taglines]])&lt;/small&gt;}}

==John Connor==
* ''[opening lines]'' &quot;The future has not been written. There is no fate but what we make for ourselves.&quot; I wish I could believe that. My name is John Connor. They tried to murder me before I was born. When I was 13, they tried again. Machines from the future. Terminators. All my life my mother told me the storm was coming - Judgment Day, the beginning of a war between man and machines. Three billion lives were vanished in an instant. And I would lead what was left of the human race to ultimate victory. It hasn’t happened, no bombs fell, computers didn’t take control. We stopped Judgment Day. I should feel safe. But I don’t. So I live off the grid, no phone, no address. No one and nothing can find me. I’ve erased all connections to the past. But as hard as I try, I can't erase my dreams. My nightmares.
* ''[waking up from his nightmares]'' I feel the weight of the future bearing down on me. A future I don't want. So I keep running...as fast as I can...anywhere...nowhere...
* ''[last lines]'' By the time SkyNet became self-aware it had spread into millions of computer servers all across the planet. Ordinary computers in office buildings, dorm rooms, everywhere. It was software, in cyberspace. There was no system core. It could not be shut down. The attack began at 6:18 P.M. just as he said it would. Judgment Day. The day the human race was nearly destroyed by the weapons they built to protect themselves. I should have realized our destiny was never to stop Judgment Day; it was merely to survive it. Together. The Terminator knew. He tried to tell us, but I didn't want to hear it. Maybe the future has been written. I don't know. All I know is what the Terminator taught me. Never stop fighting. And I never will. The battle has just begun.

== Dialogue ==
:'''Terminator''': Katherine Brewster, have you sustained injury?
:'''Brewster''': Drop dead, you asshole!
:'''Terminator''': Am unable to comply.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': All right, get off at the next exit, let her out.
:'''Terminator''': Negative. Katherine Brewster must be protected.
:'''John''': I thought ''I'' was the one they were after.
:'''Terminator''': You could not be located. So a T-X was sent back through time to eliminate your lieutenants.
:'''John''': So... she's gonna be in the resistance? If... oh, no. No, you shouldn't exist! We took out Cyberdyne over ten years ago. We stopped Judgment Day.
:'''Terminator''': You only postponed it. Judgment Day is inevitable.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Terminator cuts into its own chest]''
:'''John''': What are you doing?
:'''Terminator''': I am powered by two hydrogen fuel cells. My primary cell was damaged in a plasma attack. T-X is designed for extreme combat, driven by a plasma reactor and equipped with onboard weapons. Its arsenal includes nanotechnological transjectors.
:'''John''': Meaning...?
:'''Terminator''': It can control other machines. ''[Pulls off a piece of flesh covering, throws it out car window]'' Its body chassis is heavily armored and hardened to withstand external attack.
:'''John''': You'll find a way to destroy her.
:'''Terminator''': Unlikely. I'm an obsolete design. T-X is faster, more powerful and more intelligent. It's a far more effective killing machine.
:'''John''': Oh, great. That's great.
:'''Terminator''': ''[removing damaged cell]'' My presence in this timeline has been anticipated. T-X is designed to terminate other cybernetic organisms.
:'''John''': So... she's an Anti-Terminator... Terminator? You've gotta be shitting me.
:'''Terminator''': No, I am not shitting you.
:''[Throws cell away; it explodes by the roadside]''
:'''Terminator''': When ruptured, the fuel cells become unstable. Relax.
:'''Brewster''': ''[in the back of the truck]'' LET ME OUT OF HERE!
:'''Terminator''': ''[turning back towards her]'' Relax!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': Just leave me here. I'm not the one you want. You're wasting your time.
:'''Terminator''': Incorrect. John Connor leads the resistance to victory.
:'''John''': How? Why? Why me?
:'''Terminator''': You are John Connor.
:'''John''': Christ! My mom fed me that bullshit since the cradle! Look at me! I'm no leader! I never was! I'm never gonna... ''[Terminator grabs him by the throat and lifts him in the air]'' Let go!
:'''Terminator''': You're right. You're not the one I want. I'm wasting my time.
:'''John''': Fuck you... you fucking machine!
:'''Terminator''': ''[releases John]'' Better.
:'''John''': You were just dicking with me?!
:'''Terminator''': Anger is more useful than despair.
:'''John''': What?!
:'''Terminator''': Basic psychology is among my sub-routines.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the Terminator gives a long and complicated explanation of John's death]''
:'''John''': What? What are you saying?
:'''Terminator''': ''[looks back at him]'' I killed you.
:''[John is left stunned by the revelation]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John asks the Terminator about the revelation that Kate is actually his future wife]''
:'''John''': Are you sure about this... me and her?
:'''Terminator''': Your confusion is not rational. She is a healthy female of breeding age.
:'''John''': Well, I think there's a little more to it than that...
:'''Terminator''': My database does not encompass the dynamics of human pair bonding.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[John, Kate and the Terminator rescue an already wounded Lt Gen Brewster]''
:'''John Connor''': We have to shut down SkyNet. Where's the system core? Somewhere in this building?
:'''Lt Gen Robert Brewster''': SkyNet. The virus has infected SkyNet.
:'''John''': SkyNet ''is'' the virus. It's the reason everything's falling apart!
:'''Terminator''': SkyNet has become self-aware. In one hour, it will initiate a massive nuclear attack on it's enemy.
:'''Brewster''': What enemy?
:'''John''': Us. HUMANS!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John''': ''[sees Terminator coming towards the plane]'' Yes, he made it!
:'''Terminator''': Get away from me! Leave... now!
:'''Kate''': ''[From plane]'' Let's go, John! ''[John hops into plane while Kate runs startup checklist]'' The master's on. Throttle's set.
:'''John''': Come on, let's go! ''[the Terminator yanks door open, grabs John, and throws him across the room. Terminator comes after him]'' Please, you can't do this!
:'''Terminator''': I have no choice. The... T-X... has cor... corrupted my system.
:'''John''': You can't kill a human being. You said so yourself!
:'''Kate''': ''[jumps on Terminator's back]'' Let him go! ''[the Terminator throws her off]''
:'''John''': You're fighting it right now!
:'''Terminator''': My CPU is intact. But I cannot control... my other functions.
:'''John''': You don't have to do this. You don't want to do this!!!
:'''Terminator''': Desire is irrelevant. I am a machine! ''[grabs John and throws him against a car. Comes up and takes John by the throat]''
:'''John''': What is your mission?!
:'''Terminator''': To ensure the survival of John Connor and Katherine Brewster. ''[raises his fist]''
:'''John''': You are about to ''fail'' that mission!
:'''Terminator''': I can... I cannot.
:'''John''': You know what you have to do! You know my destiny! I have to live!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[At Crystal Peak, John Connor and Kate Brewster hear messages over the shortwave radio]''
:'''Radio Operator''': Hello? Hello? CQ CQ, is anybody there?
:'''John''': ''[disarms bomb and presses speak button]'' This is John Connor, Crystal Peak.
:'''Radio Operator''': Connor, what the hell is happening? Who's in charge there?
:'''John''': ''[short pause]'' I am.

==Cast==
*[[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] - The Terminator
*Nick Stahl - John Connor
*[[Claire Danes]] - Catherine Brewster
*[[Kristanna Loken]] - T-X
*David Andrews - Lt General Robert Brewster, USAF

==Taglines==
*Next summer, the Machines will Rise.
*The Machines Will Rise.
*[from trailer] Judgment Day is upon us [..] and our last hope in the war against the machines is one of them.

== About ==
* &quot;In one word : Great. There was a small part of me that hoped it wasn't good - but another part of me hope'd it succeeded. And it did. And I'm so glad it did. Jonathon's made a great movie. Arnold's in great form. I really like what he's done with it&quot;. If he had done it, would he have handled it differently: &quot;Yes. That's only natural. I mightn't have structrued it the same, nor may I have ended it the same way - but coming in where he has, such a hard thing to do, and I give Jonathan points for it&quot;.
:* [[James Cameron]] [http://movieweb.com/james-cameron-talks-about-t3-and-aliens-5/]
==See also==
* ''[[The Terminator]]''
* ''[[Terminator 2: Judgment Day]]''
* ''[[Terminator Salvation]]''
* ''[[Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles]]''
* ''[[Terminator Genisys]]''
* ''[[Terminator: Dark Fate]]''
* ''[[Terminator Zero]]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0181852|Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines}}

[[Category:2003 films]]
[[Category:2003 American films]]
[[Category:2000s American films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Science fiction horror films]]
[[Category:Action films]]
[[Category:Films about technology]]
[[Category:Thriller films]]
[[Category:Terminator]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Time travel films]]
[[Category:Chase films]]
[[Category:Alternate timeline films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Jonathan Mostow]]

[[es:Terminator]]</text>
      <sha1>ggj64cfrdoy4c1sud9089yuv74kqrqy</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Bambi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>23895</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965245</id>
      <parentid>3963598</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:58:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965245</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10838" sha1="nnuoru0o030fv3vexx60ki5uxsshwmq" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Bambi 8.jpg|thumb|Eating greens is a special treat. It makes long ears and great big feet.]]
[[File:Bambi 1942 trailer- 00 min 29 s.png|thumb]]
[[File:Bambi 2.jpg|thumb]]
'''''[[w:Bambi|Bambi]]''''' is a 1942 American animated drama film produced by [[w:Walt Disney Pictures|Walt Disney Productions]] and released by [[w:RKO Pictures|RKO Radio Pictures]]. The film is loosely based on the 1923 novel ''[[w:Bambi, A Life in the Woods|Bambi, A Life in the Woods]]'' by Austrian author [[w:Felix Salten|Felix Salten]]. The plot centers on a baby [[w:fawn|fawn]] named Bambi who grows up in the wild after his mother is shot by hunters.
:''Directed by [[w:David Hand (animator)|David Hand]]. Written by [[w:Perce Pearce|Perce Pearce]] and [[w:Larry Morey|Larry Morey]].''
{{center|'''Walt Disney's multiplane technicolor feature'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]}}

==Thumper==
* If you can't say somethin' nice.., don't say nothin' at all.
* Eating greens is a special treat. It makes long ears and great big feet. ''[to Bambi, aloud]'' But it sure is awful stuff to eat. ''[looks at his mother and turns to Bambi]'' ''[whispering]'' I made that last part up myself.
* ''[after thumping his foot by a old trunk]'' I'm thumpin'. That’s why they call me Thumper! ''[his echo comes on 'call me Thumper']'' Thumper! ''[his echo comes on 'Thumper!']''

==Bambi's Mother==
* You must never rush out on the meadow. There might be danger. Out there, we're unprotected.  The meadow is wide and open, and there are no trees or bushes to hide us. So we have to be very careful.  Wait here. I'll go out first. And if the meadow is safe, I'll call you.
* [[Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie|Yes.]] I know.
* Everyone respects him. He is the oldest deer to have lived. He is very brave and very wise. That's why he is known as the great Prince of the Forest.
* ''[last words before her death]'' '''FASTER, FASTER BAMBI! DON'T LOOK BACK! KEEP RUNNING! KEEP RUNNING!'''

==The Great Prince of the Forest==
* ''[to Bambi after his mother died at the hands of Man]'' Your mother can't be with you anymore. Come, my son.
* ''[to Bambi]'' It is Man. He is here again. There are many this time. We must go deep into the forest. Hurry! Follow me!

==Dialogue==
:'''Young Bambi''': Mother, what are we going to do today?
:'''Bambi's mother''': I'm going to take you to the meadow.
:'''Young Bambi''': Meadow? What's the meadow?
:'''Bambi's mother''': It's a very wonderful place.
:'''Young Bambi''': Then, why haven't we been there before?
:'''Bambi's mother''': You weren't big enough.
:'''Young Bambi''': Mother, you know what?
:'''Bambi's mother''': What?
:'''Young Bambi''': We're not the only deer in the forest.
:'''Bambi's mother''': Where did you hear that?
:'''Young Bambi''': Thumper told me.
:'''Bambi's mother''': Well, he's right. There are many deer in the forest besides us.
:'''Young Bambi''': Then, why don't I ever see them?
:'''Bambi's mother''': You will. Sometimes.
:'''Young Bambi''': On the meadow?
:'''Bambi's mother''': Perhaps. Hush now. We're almost there. ''[Bambi and his mother arrive at the meadow]''
:'''Young Bambi''': ''[becomes excited]'' The meadow! ''[starts running out]''
:'''Bambi's mother''': Wait! Bambi, wait! ''[stops him]'' You must never rush out on the meadow. There might be danger. Out there, we're unprotected. The meadow is wide and open, and there are no trees or bushes to hide us. So, we have to be very careful. Wait here. I'll go out first. And if the meadow is safe, I'll call you. ''[Bambi hides in the bush]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Thumper's sisters''': Good morning, Prince Bambi!
:'''Thumper's mother''': Good morning, young prince.
:'''Young Bambi''': Hello. What are you eating?
:'''Thumper's sisters''': Clovers. It's awfully good!
:'''Thumper''': It's delicious! Why don't you try some? ''[Bambi grabs a bunch of clovers with leaves and stems on them]'' No, no! Not that green stuff! Just eat the blossoms! That's the good stuff! ''[Thumper goes to eat the blossom until his mother call him]''
:'''Thumper's mother''': Thumper! ''[Thumper stops]''
:'''Thumper''': Yes, mama?
:'''Thumper's mother''': What did your father tell you?
:'''Thumper''': About what?
:'''Thumper's mother''': About eating the blossoms, and leaving the greens.
:'''Thumper''': Oh, that one. ''[clears throat]'' Eating greens is a special treat. It makes long ears and great big feet. ''[to Bambi]'' But it sure is awful stuff to eat. ''[whispers]'' I made that last part up myself.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Faline''': He's kinda bashful, isn't he, mama?
:'''Ena''': Well, maybe he wouldn't be, if you'd say &quot;hello&quot;.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Friend Owl''': Nearly everybody gets twitterpated in the springtime. For example, you're walking along, minding your own business, then, you're looking neither to the left, nor to the right, when all of the sudden, you run smack into a pretty face. WHOO WHOO! ''[Flower jumps into Thumper's lap in shock]'' You'll begin to get weak in the knees, your head's in a whirl! And then you feel light as feather, and, before you know it, you're walking on air! ''[mimes walking on the air]'' And then, you know what? You're knocked for a loop! And you completely lose your head!
:'''Thumper''': Gosh, that's awful!
:'''Flower''': Gee whiz!
:'''Bambi''': Terrible!
:'''Friend Owl''': And that ain't all, it could happen to anybody. So, you'd better be careful. It can happen to you, and you! ''[looks at Flower]'' Yes, it can even happen to ''you''.
:'''Thumper''': Well, it's not gonna happen to me.
:'''Bambi''': Me neither.
:'''Flower''': Me neither.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[In the thicket, Faline is yet asleep. The sound of the birds awakens her. They are frightened and calling wildly. Faline pricks up her ears. Danger. She looks behind her. Bambi is gone]''
:'''Faline''': Bambi! Bambi, where are you?
:''[Faline runs into the woods to find him. Bambi runs back to the thicket. But by the time he gets there, Faline is gone]''
:'''Bambi''': Faline! Faline!
:''[All the small animals in the forest are now frightened and alert. Some duck inside tree hollows for safety. A group of the pheasants scramble to hide in a patch of tall reeds. All the pheasants are afraid, but one, the youngest one, is terrified]''
:'''The Pheasant 1''': Listen! He's coming!
:'''The Pheasant 2''': Hush!
:'''The Pheasant 3''': Be quiet!
:'''The Pheasant 1''': He's coming closer!
:'''The Pheasant 3''': Be calm! Don't get excited.
:''[The poor little pheasant paces hesitantly in the weeds]''
:'''The Pheasant 1''': We'd better fly.
:'''The Pheasant 2''': No! No! Don't fly. Whatever you do, don't fly.
:''[But the youngest pheasant is too afraid to listen]''
:'''The Pheasant 1''': He's almost here! '''''I CAN'T STAND IT ANY LONGER!!''''' ''[She flaps her wings and flies into the air above the weeds]''
:''[The sound of gunshot rings through the air, and the young pheasant falls to the ground. She's been shot by hunters]''
:''[More gunshots sound. Terror shoots through all the animals. Faline runs through the forest in a frenzy. Bambi races about, looking for her]''
:'''Bambi''': Faline!
:''[A bullet hits the ground close to Bambi. Everywhere, feathers fall. More birds have been shot]''
:''[By this time, Faline has reached the cliff walls. She stops. Behind her, she hears a sound. It is a different sound, but just as frightening. Dogs]''
:''[Faline keeps her wits about her. She scrambles across a rock. A pack of hounds is close behind. The dogs are on her trail]''
:''[Faline dashes through the rocks. She can hear the dogs gaining. They are almost at her heels. Panic races through Faline's veins. The dogs bark frustratingly]''
:''[One of the dogs jumps at Faline. She jumps into the air and onto the tallest of the rocks. She stands there, pinned against the face of the stone. Below her, all the dogs bark furiously. They jump up, snarling and snapping at her heels]''
:'''Faline''': Bambi!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Friend Owl''': Well, I don't believe I’ve ever seen a more likely looking pair of fawns. Prince Bambi ought to be might proud.

== About Bambi ==
* The first movie I ever saw was a horror movie. It was Bambi. When that little deer gets caught in a forest fire, I was terrified, but I was also exhilarated. I can't explain it.
** [[Stephen King]] [http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/features/stephen-king-the-rolling-stone-interview-20141031 ''Stephen King: The Rolling Stone Interview''] ''Rolling Stone'' (October 31, 2014)

== Taglines==
*Walt Disney's multiplane technicolor feature
*Love Comes To The Forest Folk . . . and to you, in one of the world's greatest love stories !
*Rediscover the wonder of this beautifully crafted animated film. [1982 re-release]
*Enchanting Entertainment for Everyone! (1966 re-release)
*BUBBLING WITH Laughter! TINGLING WITH Excitement! SPARKLING WITH Delight! (1966 re-release)
*5 HAPPY SONG HITS... to Warm Your Heart! (1966 re-release)
*A great love story.

== Voice cast ==
* [[w:Bobby Stewart|Bobby Stewart]] as Baby [[w:Bambi (character)|Bambi]]
* [[Donnie Dunagan]] as Young Bambi
* [[w:Hardie Albright|Hardie Albright]] as Adolescent Bambi
* [[w:John Sutherland|John Sutherland]] as Adult Bambi
* [[w:Paula Winslowe|Paula Winslowe]] as Bambi's Mother
* [[w:Peter Behn|Peter Behn]] as Young [[w:Thumper (Bambi)|Thumper]]
* [[w:Tim Davis|Tim Davis]] as Adolescent Thumper and Adolescent [[w:Flower (Bambi)|Flower]]
* [[w:Sam Edwards|Sam Edwards]] as Adult Thumper
* [[w:Stan Alexander|Stan Alexander]] as Young Flower
* [[w:Sterling Holloway|Sterling Holloway]] as Adult Flower
* [[w:Will Wright (actor)|Will Wright]] as Friend Owl
* [[w:Cammie King|Cammie King]] as Young [[w:Faline|Faline]]
* [[w:Ann Gillis|Ann Gillis]] as Adult Faline
* [[w:Jon Provost|Jon Provost]] as Mrs. Rabbit

==See also==
* ''[[Bambi II]]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0034492}} 
* {{rotten-tomatoes|bambi}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:1942 animated films]]
[[Category:1942 American animated films]]
[[Category:1940s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American animated romance films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age animated films]]
[[Category:Bambi films]]
[[Category:Films set in the 1940s]]
[[Category:Animated films about deer and moose]]
[[Category:Films about owls]]                                                                                                   [[sk:Bambi]]           [[km:Bambi]]
[[Category:Animated films about mother–son relationships]]
[[Category:Animated films about father–son relationships]]
[[Category:Animated films about death]]
[[Category:Animated films based on novels]]
[[Category:United States National Film Registry films]]
[[Category:Films directed by David Hand]]</text>
      <sha1>nnuoru0o030fv3vexx60ki5uxsshwmq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Histeria!</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>24033</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964918</id>
      <parentid>3953867</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:53:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964918</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="56586" sha1="jaeuvt6szvnqped2twnt13qjhmto4ba" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Histeria!|Histeria!]]''''' is an animated series on [[w:Kids' WB|Kids' WB]] that featured a regular cast performing comedy sketches based around history, created by the producers of ''[[Tiny Toon Adventures]]'' and ''[[Animaniacs]]''.

== Catch phrases ==

* &quot;The year, ___1868________. The place, ___Little Bighorn, Montana_________.&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]
* &quot;We're walkin', we're walkin'...&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Miss Information|Miss Information]]
* &quot;SHEESH! WHAT A GROUCH!!&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]
* &quot;I'm not happy.&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]
* &quot;What's the dilly-o wit' dat?&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Aka Pella|Aka Pella]]
* &quot;Bummer!&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]
* &quot;Heeey! You're not __Haggen or Dazs______________! (Gypola/Ripoffski!)&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pepper Mills|Pepper Mills]]
* &quot;Hi-yo!&quot;, &quot;Yes now!&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lucky Bob|Lucky Bob]], quoting [[w:Ed McMahon|Ed McMahon]]
* &quot;Owwww!&quot; ~[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pule Houser|Pule Houser]]
* &quot;Shut up!&quot; ~[[w:Nostradamus in popular culture|Nostradamus]]

== Episode quotes ==

=== Inventors Hall of Fame I ===
=== Inventors Hall of Fame II ===
=== The U.S. Civil War, part I ===
=== The Attack of the Vikings ===

:'''Ivar the Boneless''': My brothers and I are leaving on a six-month loot and pillage of England, and we're looking for a ship with a savage countenance.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Chit Chatterson|Chit Chatterson]]''': Well, Boney, you've come to the right place! I've just the thing - one of our big, BIG sellers! On sale today only, we call it the terrifying King of the Jungle! ''[reveals a ship with a kitten figurehead]''
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': It's a kitty!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': No, it's a ferocious jungle cat! ROARR!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': It's a kitty! I can't invade England with a kitty on the front of my boat!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Are you kidding? This thing will strike terror in their souls! It will send people running!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Only if they're allergic to kitties. I need something fierce!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': He's fierce!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': He's smiling!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': No he's not!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': That's one of those inscrutible little kitty smiles!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': No, he's thinking!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, thinking! Great! &quot;Here come the Vikings, they're going to think us to death! Oh, my brain's filled with thoughts! Run for your lives!&quot;
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Now now, Boneless baby, look at those eyes! They say, &quot;I'm angry!&quot; They say, &quot;I'm dangerous!&quot; They say--
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': They say, &quot;Meow,&quot; he's a happy little kitten!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': I happen to know he's not the least bit happy. He's actually rather sad.
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Oh, even better! &quot;Run everyone! Here come the Sad Kitty Vikings! Look out or we'll depress you! Ooooh!&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Okay, you want something fierce?
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Well, that's the concept! Something that'll strike fear and make entire nations surrender and bow to us!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': I have just what you're looking for - the dreaded dragon! ''[reveals a figurehead of a duckling]''
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': No, that's not a dragon.
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Sure it is; a fire-breathing dragon! ROARR!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': No it's not, it's a duckie!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Excuse me! Hello? A duckie? Earth to Boneless! That's a fire-breathing dragon!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': With a beak and feathers?!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Have you ever seen a real dragon?
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': No.
:'''Chit Chatterson''': They have beaks and feathers!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Not on ''my'' ship, they don't!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chit Chatterson''': We have a new design that just came in! We call it, Leader of the Wolfpack! ''[reveals a figurehead of a puppy]'' Whaddaya think?
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': I think you're deranged.
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Whaat?!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': It's a puppy!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': No, it's a wol-uf! Howling at the moon! AH-OOOOOH!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': It's a newborn puppy who's just done a naughty! Look, I don't think you're grasping the concept here. I want to soar over the waves with a ferocious figurehead on my ship!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Soar, yes! How about a hawk, vicious, sweeping down for the kill?
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Now you're talking!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': There ya go! ''[reveals a figurehead of a butterfly]''
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Hmm. Doesn't exactly resemble a hawk, does it?
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Sure that's a hawk all right, streaking through the sky! HAWWK! HAWWK!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Don't hawks have sharp talons, you know, CLAWS?
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Not always.
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': I think they do!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': They trim their claws!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': What?!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': For special occasions, they trim them!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': No they don't!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Sure, for formal occasions!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Oh stop! It's not a hawk at all!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Yes it is!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': It's a butterfly!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': No!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': Yes, a pretty butterfly, fluttering across the water!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Hmm, hmm... I don't see it.
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': There's nothing scary here at all, is there?
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Well...
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': It's like all your ship's figureheads are being designed by a three-year-old!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Oh, that's just not true!
:'''Ivar the Boneless''': No?
:'''Chit Chatterson''': No! Actually, I don't think he's over twelve months. ''[camera pans to reveal [[w:Big Fat Baby|Big Fat Baby]] designing figureheads]''

=== The Wild West ===

:'''Doc Holiday''': No if anyone says that again, I'll kill them. 

:'''Miss Information''': Oh my fortunately, we've run out of time. 

:'''Doc Holiday''': Good. 

:'''Miss Information''': But before we go, I'd like to bring out a special guest.

:'''Bugs Bunny''': Eh what's up doc? 

:'''Doc Holiday''': Alright that does it I've had it.

=== American Revolution I ===
=== More Explorers ===

:'''[[w:Bill Straitman|Bill Straitman]]''': Hello, and greetings from the Viking Museum of Weaponry. We're here today with Hakon the Good, king of Norway during the tenth century, and one of the great Viking leaders and warriors.
:'''Hakon the Good''': Glad to be here, Bill!
:'''Bill Straitman''': Hakon's brought along some weapons to share with us.
:'''Hakon the Good''': That's right!
:'''Bill Straitman''': Now I understand that great Viking warriors such as yourself like to name their swords.
:'''Hakon the Good''': True, Bill!
:'''Bill Straitman''': Brave names like Excalibur and so on.
:'''Hakon the Good''': Yes!
:'''Bill Straitman''': Fierce names; brutal, bloody names.
:'''Hakon the Good''': That is correct!
:'''Bill Straitman''': Well, tell us, what is this one called?
:'''Hakon the Good''': Oh, this one here? This is Bob! Bob the Sword! ''[pronounces &quot;sword&quot; with a loud &quot;w&quot; sound]''
:'''Bill Straitman''': Bob?
:'''Hakon the Good''': Right! And that's Timmy over there! And right here is Greta! Greta likes Timmy, don't you, Greta? ''[as Greta]'' &quot;That's right! I want to marry Timmy!&quot; ''[as himself]'' But not if Bob has anything to say about it! Right, Bob? ''[as Bob]'' &quot;That's right! You can't marry Timmy; ''I'' want to marry you!&quot; ''[as Greta]'' &quot;But I love Timmy!&quot; ''[as Bob]'' &quot;Too bad! You're marryin' me!&quot; ''[as Timmy]'' &quot;Over my dead body!&quot; says Timmy! ''[as Bob]'' &quot;Oh yeah?!&quot; ''[as Timmy]'' &quot;Yeah!&quot; ''[as Bob]'' &quot;Well then, let's go at it!&quot; ''[begins fighting with himself using the swords, falling over backwards]'' &quot;Hey, get offa me!&quot; ''[as Timmy]'' &quot;Oh, you're askin' for it! Here comes Dicky Boy!&quot; ''[grabs a nearby axe and speaks with a new voice as Dicky]'' &quot;Stand aside, Greta; I'll take care of these two!&quot;
:'''Bill Straitman''': Apparently, Hakon's helmet is a touch too tight. Thank you and so long from the Viking Museum of Weaponry. AAAAHH!
:'''Hakon the Good''': ''[as Bob]'' &quot;Come back here, you! I'm not finished with you yet!&quot; ''[as Greta]'' &quot;I won't have you runnin' away from you!&quot;

=== The Know-It-Alls ===

:'''[[w:Nostradamus|Nostradamus]]''': Mary had a little lamb&lt;br&gt;Its fleece was white as snow&lt;br&gt;And everywhere that Mary went, [''the lamb was sure to go, but in [[w:Germany|Germany]] where'']&lt;br&gt;There was a scary man named [[w:Adolf Hitler|Hitler]]!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:René Descartes|René Descartes]]''': I drink, therefore I must visit the restroom. No... I wink, therefore I flirt with girls. Nooo! I sink, therefore I must take svimming lessons!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''René Descartes''': ''[answering the door]'' What do ''you'' want?!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': I'm not happy.
:'''René Descartes''': Neither am I!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Cho-Cho|Cho-Cho]]''': Hi mistah! Wanna buy a magazine? I've got [[w:Time Magazine|Time]] and [[w:Sports Illustrated|Sports Illustrated]], [[w:Fortune Magazine|Fortune]], [[w:People Magazine|People]], [[w:Entertainment Weekly|Entertainment Weekly]], [[w:Highlights for Children|Highlights]]...
:'''René Descartes''': No! Go away!
:'''Cho-Cho''': Well, someone woke up on the wrong side of the windmill this morning! Right, Lucky Bob?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lucky Bob|Lucky Bob]]''': Yes!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': Pizza's here!
:'''René Descartes''': What?
:'''Toast''': Here's your pepperoni pizza with extra barbecue sauce, hold the anchovies.
:'''René Descartes''': I didn't order any pizza!
:'''Toast''': Yeah ya did, I got the order right here.
:'''René Descartes''': That is not my address; this is for [[w:Galileo Galilei|Galileo]]. He lives in [[w:Italy|Italy]].
:'''Toast''': Well, I don't think I can get ''there'' in a half-hour or less.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Aka Pella''': Like, mister, are you okay?
:'''Toast''': I think the dude's having a nervous breakdown.
:'''René Descartes''': Oh, you ''think'' so, do you?! Well, I think that -- Think? Think! That's it! &quot;[[w:I think, therefore I am|I think, therefore I am!]]&quot; I did it! I did it, huhuhu! ''[in singsong]'' I found a basic axiom upon which to be acknowledged!
:'''Toast''': Spare me the details, brainy-dude. Can I get paid for the pizza now?
:'''René Descartes''': No no no, wait wait, I'm on a role! &quot;I think, therefore I am!&quot; Don't you see? It is so simple! If I think, then I exist. If I don't think, then I don't exist! Now I can solve any mystery known to man! Go ahead, ask me something! Something!
:'''Toast''': Who's gonna pay for this pizza?
:'''René Descartes''': I--I don't know. I have absolutely no idea. I can't think! Therefore I am-- ''[suddenly vanishes]''
:'''Toast''': Gone, chuh! The dude stiffed me!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': What a gyp!!
:'''Toast''': Hey! Don't disappear on me, deadbeat philosopher dude! Think yourself back into existence! Somebody's gotta pay for the pie, man!

=== The Renaissance ===

=== The U.S. Civil War, part II ===

=== Really Oldies But Goodies ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': ''[about Alexander the Great naming cities after himself]'' But for travelers, it could get confusing.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': Yo, excuse me. Could you tell me how to get to [[W:Alexandria_(disambiguation)|Alexandria?]]
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#World's Oldest Woman|World's Oldest Woman]]''': Sure thing, bubby. Just head southeast into Persia, cross the Zambrose Mountains, and when you hit Afghanistan, turn right at Kabul. You can't miss it.
:'''Toast''': Whoa, that's kinda far. Uh, how about Alexandria?
:'''World's Oldest Woman''': OK, y'know where Merv and Central Asia used to be?
:'''Toast''': Yeah.
:'''World's Oldest Woman''': Bingo!
:'''Toast''': Central Asia, huh? Well, what about Alexandria?
:'''World's Oldest Woman''': Ohboy, darlin', you just went right past it! Just turn around and make tracks about 1200 kilometers worth, and when you hit the Libyan Border, hang a right to the Mediterranean Sea. Then you row-row-row your boat, uno-dos-tres, and when you find yourself around a bunch of naked armless statues, you're there!
:'''Toast''': Uh... well, that really sounds out of the way. Do you think Alexandria would be closer?
:'''World's Oldest Woman''': Oh, you mean ''that'' Alexandria! Dreamboat, you're here!

=== The American Revolution part II ===

:'''[[w:George Washington|George Washington]]''': ''[narrating]'' And so the British Parliament passed [[w:The Stamp Act|the Stamp Act]], which taxed newspapers, playing cards, and all printed material imported by the colonies. The American colonists were not happy.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': We're not happy.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pule Houser|Pule Houser]]''': Hey, this tax is unfair!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': We won't pay! ''[Redcoats surround them and cock their guns.]'' Unless they make us.
:'''George Washington''': Then in 1767, Parliament passed the Townend act, which taxed tea, paper, glass, and lots of other items. Now the colonists were even less happy.
:''[The Redcoats surround Froggo, Charity, and Pule with their guns again.]''
:'''Charity Bazaar''': Now we're even less happy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': The place, Boston Harbor. The date, December 16, 1773. Tea time, 4 PM sharp! But does the party start on time?! Noooo!
:'''[[w:Samuel Adams|Samuel Adams]]''': Well, Lendall Pitts, Paul Revere, and I were running a little late.
:'''Father Time''': For guys who're gonna be called Minutemen, you'd think one of them could wear a watch!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Froggo''': Five colonists were killed by the King's Redcoats [in the Boston Massacre].
:'''Ghost of Lead Colonist''': Boy, and ''this'' made us so unhappy you wouldn't believe it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Redcoat''': This ''is'' a tea party, isn't it?
:'''Samuel Adams''': Yes sir, this may be remembered as the biggest tea party in history, sir!
:'''Redcoat''': Well, it won't be remembered for its abundance of tea, will it?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Native American #1''': We would like to express our displeasure with the Colonists' choice to disguise themselves as Native Americans.
:'''Native American #2''': Their whooping and hollering perpetuates the stereotype that Native Americans are savages.
:'''Native American #1''': We are a peace-loving people who only use a war cry in battle to intimidate our enemies.
:'''Native American #2''': ''And'' when we're playing Yahtzee!
:'''Native Americans''': ''[in unison]'' YAHTZEE! ''[run about whooping and hollering]''

=== A Blast in a Past ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': Everyone be very, very quiet. The slightest sound could make this whole place crumble to pieces.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Miss Information|Miss Information]]''': I just hope there's no truth to the curse of [[w:Tutankhamen|King Tut]]'s tomb.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Curse?! There's a curse?!
:'''Miss Information''': Quiet!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': What kind of a curse?!
:'''Miss Information''': Shh!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': I didn't know there was a curse!
:'''Miss Information''': Shh! The walls could collapse on all of us.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': I don't want to hear about any curse!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Fetch|Fetch]]''': I'm with him!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Time''': That's right! Your very first wet nurse!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': Uh... what's a wet nurse?
:'''Announcer''': And now, a word from [[w:Noah Webster|Noah Webster]].
:'''Noah Webster''': Wet nurse. Noun, meaning a woman who cares for and suckles children not of her own.
:'''Crowd''': Eww, gross!
:'''Toast''': Intense reekage!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': I'm ''really'' not happy.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lydia Karaoke|Lydia Karaoke]]''': And I had such high hopes for this show.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lydia Karaoke''': I'm officially writing a letter of complaint to myself!

=== China ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Cho-Cho|Cho-Cho]]''': As the great Chinese philosopher [[w:Lao Tzu|Lao Tzu]] once said...
:'''Lao Tzu''': The journey of a thousand miles must always begin with a single step.
:''[Big Fat Baby wanders to the edge of the stairs and falls down them.]''
:'''Cho-Cho''': This is going to be a ''long'' trip!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Confucius|Confucius]]''': Never belch before a lady.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': Sorry! ''[points to Charity]'' I didn't know it was her turn.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': 1766 B.C. brought with it the Shan Dynasty, which led to the use of bows, arrows, and spears.
:'''Froggo''': Spears for fighting our enemies.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': ARROWS FOR DEFENDING OUR FAMILIES!!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pepper Mills|Pepper Mills]]''': And bows for final touches on our snappy hairstyles! Ahahahaha! I love it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pepper Mills''': ''[in response to getting [[w:Benjamin Franklin|Benjamin Franklin]]'s autograph]'' Thank you thank you thank. Hey, you're not [[w:Richard Gere|Richard Gere]]! And what are you doing in this episode about China? That is kooky!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Time''': Hi gang, Pop Quiz here! We ask several historical questions for our players then act flabbergasted at their overwhelming ignorance!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucky Bob''': My friends call me Lucky Bob.
:'''Father Time''': Do you want ''me'' to call you Lucky Bob?
:'''Lucky Bob''': That would make you my friend.
:'''Father Time''': No thanks.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Time''': If you're through, I'll introduce challenger #2, whose name is...
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Susanna Susquahanna|Susanna Susquahanna]]''': ''[pushes her buzzer]'' Thuthanna Thuthquahanna.
:'''Father Time''': I thought it was Susanna Susquahanna.
:'''Susanna Susquahanna''': That'th what I thaid.
:'''Father Time''': Oh very good then. We have Bob and Thuthanna.
:'''Susanna Susquahanna''': That'th true.
:'''Father Time''': Sorry, no points for getting your own name right.


:'''Confucius''': Okay that's it there's plenty more about China but we're out of time we'll have to wait until next time for another episode of. Miss Information. 

:'''Miss Information''': Histeria!

=== Tribute to Tyrants ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': ''[regarding Lady Godiva riding through town naked]'' See it!! See it!! See it!! ''[swings away]'' Don't see it!! Don't see it!! Don't see it!! ''[swings back]'' See it!! See it!! See it!! ''(swings away)'' Don't see it!! Don't see it!! Don't see it!! ...and I don't wanna see it!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Lord Caesar!! Bad news!! There's a plot against your life!!
:'''[[w:Julius Caesar|Julius Caesar]]''': Are you sure?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Yes, Lord Caesar!!
:'''[[w:Cleopatra|Cleopatra]] ([[w:List of Histeria! characters#World's Oldest Woman|World's Oldest Woman]])''': Oh, Jules... Mommy needs a little help with the choker!
:'''Julius Caesar''': Get me my chariot!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Lord Caesar, where are you going?!
:'''Julius Caesar''': To the Senate, where else?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': But the assassins wait for you there!! It could mean certain death!!
:'''Julius Caesar''': I know, I know, yippee!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': What a nut!!
*'''Cleopatra (World's Oldest Woman)''': Oh, he's so brave.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Bad news, Lord Anthony!! [[w:Octavian|Octavian]]'s forces have surrounded the city!!
:'''[[w:Mark Anthony|Mark Anthony]]''': Really?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Yeah, situation stinks!
:'''[[w:Cleopatra|Cleopatra]] ([[w:List of Histeria! characters#World's Oldest Woman|World's Oldest Woman]])''': Oh, Anthony honey... You favorite Queen of the Nile needs a back loofah!
:'''Mark Anthony''': Yeah, well, uh, hmm. To the front!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': But Lord Anthony, we're outnumbered twenty to one!! The front will mean your certain doom!!
:'''Mark Anthony''': I know, haha, I know. Oh, well. Bottoms up!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': He's a nut too!!
*'''Cleopatra (World's Oldest Woman)''': Oh, he's so brave.

=== The Montezuma Show ===

:'''Montezuma''': Well I hope you have enjoyed our little trip through Mesoamerica today I'd like to thank all of my guests. But, it seems that cortez and his conquistador cockroaches have runned them off. But no manner, I'll let bygones be bygones because that's just the kind of man I am. And so my friends, I'm Montezuma the great speaker bid you farewell from. 

:'''Father Time''': Histeria!

=== Loud Kiddington's Ancient History ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Hey folks, Loud Kiddington here! And just when you thought your Stone Age life couldn't get any better, along comes... the wheel!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Fetch|Fetch]]''': It's the biggest thing since the rock!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': My dog Fetch here will eat bat guano if I don't sell you a wheel.
:'''Fetch''': Eat what?!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Yes, the wheel! All new for 3002 B.C.!
:'''Fetch''': I'm not eatin' bat guano!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': We'll discuss it later.
:'''Fetch''': No we won't!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loud Kiddington''': So come on down to Sumeria and buy a wheel! 'Cause if you don't, my dog Fetch here will eat a big pile of elephant plop!
:'''Fetch''': Say what?!
:'''Kid Chorus''': ''[singing]'' [[w:Cal Worthington|Go see Loud, go see Loud, go see Loud!]]
:'''Loud Kiddington''': We'll see you here!
:'''Fetch''': I quit!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Howdy, Carthaginians! Loud Kiddington here! And if I can't make you a deal, my dog Fetch'll eat a buffalo chip!
:'''Fetch''': Say what?!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Yes sir, it's a giant year-end beast of burden blow-out! Check out these savings! Here's a nifty model - take a test drive on the all-new Lipizzaners!
:'''[[w:Hannibal|Hannibal]]''': Wussies!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Or for rugged terrain, try our four-by-four all-weather oxen!
:'''Hannibal''': Puny!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Or for something even tougher, we can fix you up with your very own Teamsters!
:'''Hannibal''': Disgusting!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Howdy Roman citizens! Loud Kiddington here! And if I can't make you a deal, my dog Fetch'll eat a meadow muffin!
:'''Fetch''': Huh? What's with this kid?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Miss Information|Miss Information]]''': And to our right is the great Cathaginian general Hannibal...
:'''Hannibal''': That's ''Mr.'' Hannibal to you.
:'''Miss Information''': ...who is plottin' a surprise invasion on Rome itself.
:'''Hannibal''': Would somebody call security?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Hannibal''': It's not snack time! I want your opinion.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': Oh, well, I'd lose the hat, dude. It reeks.
:'''Hannibal''': No, not my wardrobe! If you were going to invade Rome, which way would you go?
:'''Toast''': ''[stares at the map and turns it upside-down]'' Uh... let's see...
:'''Hannibal''': ''[points to map]'' It's right ''here!!''
:'''Toast''': Oh, right, gotcha. Uh... okay, I would go, like, uh... this way?
:'''Hannibal''': Of course you would! Because you have the I.Q. of a fence! Which is precisely why we will go through the Alps, and invade from the North instead! Assemble the troops!
:'''Toast''': Woah, check me out! I'm like, a military strategist. That's pretty cool, huh?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Time''': In 218 B.C., Hannibal finally reached the Italian border.
:'''Hannibal''': Prepare to meet the wrath of the great Hannibal, you Roman dogs!
:''[Loud and Fetch suddenly appear in his path.]''
:'''Kid Chorus''': It's Loud Kiddington and his dog, Fetch!
:'''Hannibal''': ''Now'' what?!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Howdy, Hannibal!
:'''Fetch''': Your lease on the elephants is up, and you've exceeded your mileage!
:'''Hannibal''': Huh?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': That'll be 10,000 dinari!
:'''Fetch''': Payment due!
:'''Hannibal''': ''[laughs]'' I'm Hannibal! The greatest general the world's ever known! I don't pay bills! Now get out of my way before I turn you into roadkill!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Have it your way! ''[He claps his hands twice, causing the elephants to sling their riders into the dirt. Loud and the Kid Chorus taunt them from atop an elephant.]'' So long, deadbeats!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Miss Information''': One last question, Cleo. Why do you wear a snake on your head?
:'''[[w:Cleopatra|Cleopatra]] ([[w:List of Histeria! characters#World's Oldest Woman|World's Oldest Woman]])''': What?! There's a snake on my head?! Get it off, get if off, get it off, get it off me!!

=== Great Heroes of France ===
=== The Terrible Tudors ===

:'''[[w:Ivan the Terrible|Ivan Vasilyevich]] ([[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]])''': I'm tsar. Behold me!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Time''': Unfortunately...''[He is interrupted by Big Fat Baby falling off a barrel.]''...this transition from superstition to science was a slow one.
:'''Big Fat Baby''': (off-screen) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Teacher''': OK class, you have three apples and then you pick two more. What do ya have?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': A bunch of stuff.
:'''Teacher''': Uh, close enough. Ok, what do you have if I take away three?
:'''Charity Bazaar''': Not so much stuff.
:'''Teacher''': Uh, close enough.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': In 1489, the plus and minus signs first came into use.
:'''Charity Bazaar''': ''[holding up a paper graded with an F-]'' You know, I wish I could go back to the good old days.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Chit Chatterson|Chit Chatterson]]''': Listen, Ive, now that you're tsar, you need to add a &quot;the&quot; to your name.
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich (Froggo)''': Huh?
:'''Chit Chatterson''': You know, like Attila the Hun, William the Conqueror? I've got a list of suggestions for you, compiled by our oppreresive despot search department!
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': Go on.
:'''Chit Chatterson''': OK, how about Ivan the Icky?
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': WHAT?! No!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': I agree, very bad. OK, here's a good one - Ivan the Disagreeable! I like that one. It says you're mean but you can still be reasoned with.
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': Absolutely not!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Ivan the Finicky?
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': No!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Ivan the Colicky?
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': No!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Okay let's see, what else, what else? Ah! Ooh, this is you! You're gonna love this one, Ivey baby - Ivan the Naughty!
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': GET OUT! GET OUT! Aaaaaaah!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Ivan, you're terrible!
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': That's it!
:'''Chit Chatterson''': Faboo! I knew we could work something out, Ivan, the Terrible! Can I just call you &quot;Bl&quot; for short?
:'''Ivan Vasilyevich''': NO! ''[kicks Chit out]'' Guards, off with his head!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Miss Information|Miss Information]]''': In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue, and to commemorate his historic journey, each year we celebrate [[w:Columbus Day|Columbus Day]] with big parades and shamrocks and leprechauns and people wearin' green clothes!
:'''Christopher Columbus''': That's [[w:St. Patrick's Day|St. Patrick's Day]]! All my day is famous for is the half-off men's underwear sale.

=== The Wheel of History ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': The year, 245 BC. The place, Syracuse, Sicily. The scientist, Archimedes, Greek mathematician known as the father of geometry.
:'''[[w:Geometry|Geometry]] ([[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pule Houser|Pule Houser]])''': Hi pop, I'm home.
:'''[[w:Archimedes|Archimedes]] ([[w:List of Histeria! characters#Chit Chatterson|Chit Chatterson]])''': Geometry son, what happened?
:'''Geometry''': Well, my classmates beat me up again!
:'''Archimedes''': It's sad. A lot of kids seem to hate Geometry!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Archimedes''': ''[regarding his son Geometry being constantly beaten up]'' Ooooh, poor kid! I should've listened to his mother and named him Recess!

=== When Time Collides ===

:'''[[w:Jenny McCarthy|Jenny McCarthy]]''': Next up is Frederich Nietchze, who philisophized about the ideal individual being liberated from traditional values. He called his creation the Ubernietchze, or Superman.
:'''[[w:Frederich Nietchze|Frederich Nietchze]]''': ''[sitting next to [[w:Superman|Superman]]]'' ''I'' created him, but [[w:Warner Bros.|Varner Brothers]] controls the licensing rights! I DON'T GET A DIME!!

=== Around the World in a Daze ===

:'''[[w:Christopher Columbus|Christopher Columbus]]''': Note to self: Never again hire anyone from [[w:Toys R Us|Cabin Crews R Us]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chistopher Columbus''': Crow's nest! You see anything?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': LEMMIE CHECK! ''[peers through periscope]'' OMG!!!
:'''Christopher Columbus''': What is it?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': GUESS!
:'''Christopher Columbus''': Land?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': ''[imitates buzzer]'' OH, I'M SO SORRY, NO! NOTHING BUT WATER! ''[face turning red]'' YOU STARTING TO GET THE PICTURE, CAPTAIN!?
:'''Christopher Columbus''': I think the crow's nest needs a little vacae.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Christopher Columbus''': Santa Maria! Can't you take that smelly baby somewhere else?!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': Well, captain, this ''is'' the poopdeck.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': Captain Columbus, sir?
:'''Christopher Columbus''': Yes, what is it?
:'''Froggo''': We've finished cleaning your maps.
:'''Christopher Columbus''': Cleaning my maps?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lucky Bob|Lucky Bob]]''': Yes now!
:'''Froggo''': We wiped off those squiggly red lines that someone drew all over them.
:'''Christopher Columbus''': You did ''WHAT?!!?'' I drew those lines after spending hours upon hours, calculating our exact course! Now I have no idea where we are! Waaaaaaaaaaah!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': What's with him, bro?
:'''Froggo''': I'm not sure, but I think we erased his math homework.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Miss Information|Miss Information]]''': And so it was in 1492 that Christopher Columbus, with a little help from his friends, found America!
:'''Toast''': Guh! I didn't know it was missing!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Toast''': Totally excuse us, captain-dude! But it's time for us to clean out your quarters!
:'''Froggo''': And when we're finished, we'll clean out your dimes and nickels.

=== Histeria Satellite TV ===

=== General Sherman's Campsite ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': I wanna go on that choo-choo, I wanna go on that choo-choo.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pepper Mills|Pepper Mills]]''': Hi, I'm Pepper Mills! Y'know, working on ''Histeria!'', I've gotten to meet some of the biggest names in the world! For instance, this is me and [[w:Joan of Arc|the girl]] who is not [[w:Sabrina the Teenage Witch|Sabrina the Teenage Witch]]! Here I am with [[w:Thomas Jefferson|the guy]] who's not [[w:Leonardo DiCaprio|Leonardo DiCaprio]]! And this is me with [[w:American Civil War|the people]] who are not [[w:60 Minutes#Correspondents and hosts|the cast]] of ''[[w:60 Minutes|60 Minutes]]''! Ahahahaha! I love people! And now, back to ''Histeria!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': [My friends are] all completely crazy.
:'''[[w:Harriet Tubman|Harriet Tubman]]''': I agree.
:'''Charity Bazaar''': You and I are the only sane ones here.
:'''Harriet Tubman''': I think you're right.
:'''Charity Bazaar''': So... wanna fly with me to Mars on the mothership?
:'''Harriet Tubman''': What?! No way!
:'''Charity Bazaar''': ''[sighs]'' I guess I'm the only sane one here after all.


:'''Chorus''': Hey you troops it's time to end the show General Sherman marched to the sea and he defeated his foe! He's ready to burn down more, Robert E. Lee is very sore, So let's say good-bye to Sherman's Campsite!

:'''General Sherman''': At ease. 

:'''Kids''': Yes sir. 

:'''General Sherman''': Mission accomplished troops and thanks to us, the tide of the Civil War has turned it's favor of the north. 

:'''Kids''': Yay. 

:'''General Sherman''': And of course we would never have done it without the plan that I like to call 

:'''Loud Kiddington''': Total war.

=== Return to Rome ===

=== Megalomaniacs ===

:'''[[w:Genghis Khan|Genghis Khan]]''': Who keeps letting these kids in? The great Khan is tryin' to relax! Hello?! I'm guessing someone in security wants to lose his head over this!
:'''Toast''': Ho-oh! Sorry about about that, great Khan dude. We got a little distracted.
:'''Froggo''': [[w:The WB Network|The WB]] is running the ''[[w:Sister, Sister (TV series)|Sister, Sister]]'' marathon. Oh, how they make us laugh.

=== The Russian Revolution ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': In history, [[w:Joseph Stalin|Stalin]] was a despot, a murderer, a Communist dictator. But on [[w:The WB Network|The WB]], he's the star of his own sitcom, ''My Buddy Stalin''!

=== The Thomas Jefferson Program ===

=== Hooray For Presidents ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pepper Mills|Pepper Mills]]''': Hey! [[w:Dwight D. Eisenhower|you're]] not [[w:Elmer Fudd|Elmer Fudd]]! Gypola!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': DUCK!!
:'''[[w:Daffy Duck|Daffy Duck]]''': Will you knock that off?! Sheesh! A bird could develop a complex around here!

=== The Legion of Super Writers ===

:'''[[w:Edgar Allan Poe|Edgar Allan Poe]]''': I've just completed a rewrite we can ''all'' be proud of! Johnathan Livingston's ''Seagull'' is now a bloodthirsty vampire bat named Caroline, who is mysteriously compelled to fly into the propellor of an airplane, on the first page! ''[laughs evilly]''
:'''[[w:Basho|Basho]]''': It is ''still'' too long! ''[screams and slices Poe's book in half]''

=== Return to China ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Hey Emperor!
:'''[[w:Qin Shi Huangdi|Qin Shi Huangdi]]''': Oww! With the yelling and the screaming and the ear. What is it?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': We're all finished, coach!
:'''Qin Shi Huangdi''': Really?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Yup! The job is done!
:''[Huangdi's jaw drops after seeing what Loud points to.]''
:'''Qin Shi Huangdi''': What is that?
:'''Loud Kiddington''': What you asked for! That's your Great Mall!
:'''Qin Shi Huangdi''': ''[makes monkey noises and hits Loud in the head with his hat a few times]'' I said wall, not mall.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Whoa. Imagine my embarrassment.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qin Shi Huangdi''': What is a lanyard?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Aka Pella|Aka Pella]]''': It's these little things you weave at camp from plastic strips.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pule Houser|Pule Houser]]''': Yeah, and you give them to you mom, and she goes &quot;Oh, sweetie, this is so cute. I love it bluh&quot;.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': And you both know it's kind of lame, but she uses it as a key chain anyway.
:'''Aka Pella''': Because she loves your heiny.

=== Writers of the Purple Prose ===


:'''William Shakespeare:’’’ Alas Big Fat Baby I knew you well. 

:'''Father Time:’’’ Well it looks like the sands have almost run out for today’s show and as William Shakespeare always likes to say. 

:'''William Shakespeare:’’’ Parting is such sweet sorrow. 


:'''Miss Information:’’’ Which means adios muchachos. 


:’’’Father Time:’’’ See you again next time on. 

:’’’Lydia Karaoke:’’’ Histeria!

=== History of Flight ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': Do you have a bag of marshmallows and a crate of leeches I can borrow?
:'''[[w:Orville Wright|Orville Wright]]''': Umm... no.
:'''Froggo''': NO?! NO?! OH NOO! NO, IT CAN'T BE!! AAAHHHHH!!!!

=== Presidential People ===

:''[To the beat of ''[[w:Green Eggs]]'']''
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Major Loud Kiddington, at your service!
:Would you like some brock?
:'''[[w:George H. W. Bush|George Bush]]''': I like this [[w:brock]].
:I like it, let me be.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Would you like it with some corn?
:Eaten from a [[w:flute]]?
:'''George Bush''': I like it with some corn,
:Eaten from a flute.
:I like this brock,
:Now go away and let me be!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': How about here on [[w:Air Force One|Air Force One]]?
:How about with a toast?
:'''George Bush''': Yes! here on Air Force One, with a toast.
:I like it with some corn,
:Eaten from a flute.
:I like this brock,
:Now go away and let me be!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Would you, could you, yes maybe?
:Eat some with [[w:List of Histeria! characters#Big Fat Baby|Big Fat Baby]]?
:'''George Bush''': I could maybe even with Big Fat Baby.
:I like this brock,
:now go away and let me be!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': How about in your [[w:Limousine|limousine]],
:Eaten with a beauty queen?
:'''George Bush''': I like in my limousine, even with a beauty queen, even with Big Fat Baby on Air Force One with a toast, I like it with some corn
:Eaten from a flute.
:I like this brock,
:''You must go!''
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Try it and i think you'll see,
:That you will like the brock.
:'''George Buush''': If i try this brock,
:Will you go away and let me be?
:''[George Bush eats the brock and starts to swallow]''
:'''Loud Kiddington''': We adults thank you, President Bush,
:For your stand on that green mush.
:Now we can shout with pride and glee,
:'''Loud, Pepper, Susanna, Toast and Froggo''': ''WE LIKE BROKK!''

=== Histeria Around the World I ===

=== When America Was Young ===

:'''[[w:Daniel Boone|Daniel Boone]]''': All right, y'all scram! Git out the way!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': No. I will not let you devastate this innocent creature's home. I would rather die than let you ruin this land.
:'''Daniel Boone''': Ah'll give ya a cookie...
:'''Charity Bazaar''': Okay.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Now Charity, why do you say your teacher's a witch?
:'''Charity Bazaar''': Well, she looks like a witch.
:'''[[w:Molly Pitcher|Molly Pitcher]]''': [[w:Monty Python and the Holy Grail|''They'' dressed me up like this!]]
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Is that true?!
:'''Colonists''': No no no no no no no!/No way!/I should say not!
:'''Colonist 1''': Well, the hat; we ''did'' do the hat.
:'''Colonist 2''': ''And'' the nose.
:'''Colonist 1''': And maybe the broom.
:'''Colonist 2''': Right, right! Yes, the broom, I forgot about that! Oh, and a couple of the warts.
:'''Colonist 1''': Oh yes, almost forgot about the warts!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': OK, that's enough!

=== Super Amazing Constitutions ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': Do you have a bucket of worms and a keg of gunpowder?
:'''[[w:Andrew Jackson|Andrew Jackson]]''': No!
:'''Froggo''': Okay, but don't come crying to me later.
:''[Later, after Loud informs Jackson that the war has been over for two weeks...]''
:'''Andrew Jackson''': The war's been over for two weeks! ''[cries on Froggo's shoulder]''
:'''Froggo''': I told you not to come crying to me later.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Andrew Jackson''': Now listen up! I'm General Andrew Jackson!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Aka Pella|Aka Pella]]''': Oooh, are you related to Michael Jackson?
:'''Andrew Jackson''': No! Although I do have an uncle who looks a lot like Tito. Now clear out! This here's no place for children.
:'''Aka Pella''': It could be if you put in swings and a jungle gym.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Cho-Cho|Cho-Cho]]''': General?
:'''Andrew Jackson''': What?
:'''Cho-Cho''': Will you bait Lucky Bob's hook, please?
:'''Andrew Jackson''': Huh?
:'''Cho-Cho''': Worms give Lucky Bob the creeps.
:'''Lucky Bob''': You are correct, sir!
:'''Cho-Cho''': Please bait Lucky Bob's hook.
:'''Andrew Jackson''': Why do you call him 'lucky'?
:'''Cho-Cho''': 'Cause he luckily got all the good looks in his family.

=== Better Living Through Science ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': I don't wanna get disintegrated by a death ray. I have sensitive skin.

=== The Dawn of Time ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Father Time|Father Time]]''': Then in 8000 BC came...
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': THE NEOLITHIC PERIOD, OR NEW STONE AGE!
:'''Father Time''': When wild animals were tamed by farmers.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Including pigs!
:'''[[w:Porky Pig|Porky Pig]]''': Eh, th-t-t-t-t-t-t--
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Chickens!
:'''[[w:Foghorn Leghorn|Foghorn Leghorn]]''': Ah'm a rooster, son, not a chicken! Pay at-ah say, pay attention, boy! Ah'm talkin' to ya! Kid doesn't listen to a word Ah say.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': And the very first cow! ''&lt;nowiki&gt;[&lt;/nowiki&gt;[[w:Earthworm Jim|A cow falls on Foghorn]].]''

:''Miss Information''': But back then, the cow wouldn't like a peaceful creature we like today. Back then, the cow was a furious beast called the Auroch. And taming the Auroch was not an easy job. 

:'''Big Fat Baby''': Moo moo moo. 

:'''Miss Information''': But the early farmer had finally prevailed the auroch or the cow was the last major animal to be obtained as a food source. 

:'''Taz''': What food source? Why you little. 

:'''Big Fat Baby''': Moo?

=== Music ===

=== World War II ===

=== The Teddy Roosevelt Show ===

:''[Throughout this coversation, mosquitoes continually bite the characters.]''
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': Mr. President-dude! Ow! Thanks for coming and stuff.
:'''[[w:Theodore Roosevelt|Theodore Roosevelt]]''': Ow! Dee-lighted! What's wrong here, friend? Ow!
:'''Toast''': Well - dang! - for starters, just look! Ow! Mondo disease! The [[w:Panama Canal|canal]]-digging is slowing down because everyone's getting sick - ow - with [[w:Malaria|malaria]] and [[w:Yellow fever|yellow fever]]! Ow!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Hmmm... ow! The same two blasted diseases that crippled the French when ''they'' were digging the canal! Ow!
:'''Toast''': Ow! Whaddaya think - ow! - is causing it? Ow!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Ow! I don't know. Ow!
:'''Toast''': Could it be - ohw! - the food?
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Ow! I don't think so.
:'''Toast''': Humidity? Goh!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Ow! Doubtful. Ohw!
:'''Toast''': Ow! Tight pants?
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Nuh-uh. Ouch!
:'''Toast''': [[w:Beanie babies|Bean-bag babies]]? Ow!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Ow! Not likely.
:'''Toast''': Smell of gin?
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Who?
:'''Toast''': Never mind. Ow!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Ow!
:'''Toast''': [[w:Bobbleheads|Those little bobbing-head dolls]]?
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Ow! Nope.
:'''Toast''': Too much - ow! - pocket change?
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Yeow! I don't think so.
:'''Toast''': [[w:Tapioca pudding|Tapioca pudding]]? Ouch!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': Hey, maybe... naw. Ow!
:'''Toast''': Ow! [[w:Quinine|Anything starting with the letter Q]]? Ow!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': No! Ow!
:'''Toast''': Spanish peanuts? Owh!
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': No! Oww!
:'''Toast''': Aliens from [[w:Mars (planet)|Mars]] wearing golf shoes and lipstick?
:'''Theodore Roosevelt''': No, no, and you need help. Ow! Well, whatever it is, it's making the men sick. These pesky mosquitoes sure are driving me crazy!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Miss Information|Miss Information]]''': [Loud is] like a little firecracker, isn't he?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#World's Oldest Woman|World's Oldest Woman]]''': More like a crate of dynamite!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Gutzon Borglum|Gutzon Borglum]] ([[w:Elmer Fudd|Elmer Fudd]])''': Hold the stwing wight dere and be vewy vewy quiet. Woud noises can stawt--
:'''[[w:Lincoln Borglum|Lincoln Borglum]] ([[w:Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]])''': WHAJDA SAY, POP?!?
:'''Gutzon Borglum''': An avawanche!! Aaaahhh! ''[a boulder crushes him]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Gutzon Borglum''': Aah, finished! West and wewaxation at wast! And thanks to your help, it only took fouteen yeaws to compwete.
:'''Lincoln Borglum''': Aww, you're only saying that because I'm your son.
:'''Gutzon Borglum''': No, I'm saying that because working awone, I could've finished it in ''six yeaws!!''

=== Communuts! ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': ''[reenacting the fall of the Berlin Wall]''&lt;br&gt;Big Fat Baby sat on the wall!&lt;br&gt;Big Fat Baby has a great fall!&lt;br&gt;Despite the destruction, Baby had fun&lt;br&gt;As East and West Germany united as one!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Joseph Stalin|Joseph Stalin]]''': I am here to see my agent!
:'''Secretary''': You got an appointment?
:'''Joseph Stalin''': Do you know who I am!?
:'''Secretary''': Well, you look a little like that [[w:Mario|Super Mario]] guy.

=== Histeria Around the World II ===

=== Americana ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': You can lead a horse to water, but it's tough to get those swim fins on his hooves.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Howdy Puritans and Pilgrims! Loud Kiddington here! And if I can't make you a deal, my dog Fetch'll eat a turkey pellet!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Fetch|Fetch]]''': Huh?! Can we talk about this?

=== 20th Century Presidents ===

=== The French Revolution ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': We can't keep living like this.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': You mean 'cause all us peasants are poor and starving!?
:'''Charity Bazaar''': No, 'cause Toast is always hugging the bathroom.

=== North America ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Howdy prospectors and miners! Loud Kiddington here! And if I can't make you a deal, my dog Fetch here will eat an ariumu chip!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Fetch|Fetch]]''': Huh?!

=== Histeria Goes to the Moon ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lucky Bob|Lucky Bob]]''': I spy, something that begins with the letter &quot;B&quot;.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Cho-Cho|Cho-Cho]]''': Blinking lights?
:'''Lucky Bob''': Nope.
:'''Cho-Cho''': Big moon outside window?
:'''Lucky Bob''': No.
:'''Cho-Cho''': Black darkness of deep outer space?
:'''Lucky Bob''': No.
:'''Cho-Cho''': A bagel?
:'''Lucky Bob''': No.
:'''Cho-Cho''': A blintz?
:'''Lucky Bob''': No.
:'''Caption''': 55 HOURS LATER
:'''Cho-Cho''': A bupka?
:'''Lucky Bob''': No.
:'''Cho-Cho''': Big Fat Flying Baby?
:'''Lucky Bob''': No.
:'''Cho-Cho''': A Bob who is lucky?
:'''Lucky Bob''': Uh... no.
:'''Cho-Cho''': Bursting blood vessels in the astronauts' necks?
:'''Astronauts''': TELL HER ALREADY!!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Sammy Melman|Sammy Melman]]''': WHAT DO YOU SPY THAT BEGINS WITH A &quot;B&quot;?!!
:'''Lucky Bob''': Chocolate!

=== Heroes of Truth &amp; Justice ===

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Sammy Melman|Sammy Melman]]''': Your Honor, this trial is a circus!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': I know! More cotton candy, please!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sammy Melman''': Say, you seem too young to be a judge.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Yeah, and you seem too stupid to be a lawyer!
:'''Sammy Melman''': Hey!!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': No wait, I'm takin' that back! You seem stupid ''enough'' to be a lawyer!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Cho-Cho|Cho-Cho]]''': When I get older, I am going to be a singer and change my name to [[w:Yoko Ono|Yoko Ono]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loud Kiddington''': ''[singing]'' 55 bottles of root beer on the wall, 55 bottles of root beer...
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Charity Bazaar|Charity Bazaar]]''': Will you be quiet? I can't stand that stupid song.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': GREAT! YOU MADE ME FORGET WHERE I WAS! NOW I GOTTA START OVER! ''[singing]'' 99 bottles of root beer on the wall, 99 bottles of root beer...
:'''Charity Bazaar''': I'm not happy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cho-Cho''': Lucky Bob, have you seen Big Fat Baby?
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lucky Bob|Lucky Bob]]''': Yeth now!
:'''Cho-Cho''': Where?
:'''Lucky Bob''': In my mashed potatoes.
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': Lucky Bob definitely needs a vacae.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sammy Melman''': And when lightning strikes, I suppose that's not Zeus shooting at liars!
:'''[[w:Socrates|Socrates]]''': Well, what about when lightning hits a tree? Can a tree be a liar?
:'''Tree''': Trees can't even talk! Hahah! ''[is suddenly struck by lightning]'' Oops!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Lydia Karaoke|Lydia Karaoke]]''': Mr. Socrates, no no no! Hi, I'm Lydia Karaoke, network censor, and we don't want consuming of poisonous beverages on ''Histeria!'' This is a kids' show!
:'''Socrates''': But I've been sentenced to death!
:'''Lydia Karaoke''': Well, you can't die on ''Histeria!'' Give me that!
:'''Socrates''': Good, 'cause I'd really rather have a double grandé mocha latté and a Snickerdoodle.
:'''Lydia Karaoke''': Now ''that'll'' kill you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Miss Information|Miss Information]]''': We're walkin' past the famous Washington Monument, which as y'all know is named after the famous city of Washington DC.
:'''[[w:George Washington|George Washington]]''': Uh, ma'am, how many times do I have to tell you? The monument is named after ''me'', George Washington.
:'''Miss Information''': Oh really? Well, I don't think anyone calls this the George Monument, now do they?
:'''George Washington''': Uh, no.
:'''Miss Information''': Case dismissed! Let's hustle, people! We're walkin', we're movin', we're headin' towards the Lincoln Memorial, which of course was named after the town carver of the same name.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Froggo''': ''[in a spitball fight]'' Surrender or die!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Aka Pella|Aka Pella]]''': Ha! Surrender? I'll whoop yo' bottom!
:''[Aka shoots a barrage of spitballs that all land in lined patterns around Froggo.]''
:'''Froggo''': She's good!

=== Euro-Mania ===

=== Big Fat Baby Theatre ===

:'''Loretta''': I have come to take over your castle! Surrender immediately and give it to me! ''[Froggo and Aka dump a bucket of water on him.]''
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': You asked for it!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Aka Pella|Aka Pella]]''': Try not to get rusted, dawg!
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Loud Kiddington|Loud Kiddington]]''': Go home, you bums!
:'''Loretta''': This means ''war!''
:'''Aka Pella''': And ''this'' means &quot;Get away from our castle&quot;, homie! ''[She and Froggo dump another bucket of water on Loretta.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Toast|Toast]]''': Quick, dude! Get me a fan!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Check! ''[lifts in Pepper]''
:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Pepper Mills|Pepper Mills]]''': Ahahaha! Sir Toastalot! ''[hugs Toast]'' You're the dreamiest!
:'''Toast''': ''[still holding Pepper in arms, lifting her into the air]'' No, dude, the ''other'' kind of fan!
:'''Loud Kiddington''': Double check! ''[Loud then sweeps Pepper away from Toast's arms and puts her in his own, and throws her out of the way. He replaces her with a giant fan.]''
:'''Kid Chorus''': ''[mockingly]'' Missed me, missed me, and now you've got to kiss me!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loretta''': Okay, men, there will be no mistakes this time!
:'''Kid Chorus''': ''[mockingly]'' Rally, rally, the dumb guy's name is Sally!
:'''Lisa''': How did they know my name is Sally?
:'''Loretta''': It's not. Your name is Lisa.
:'''Lisa''': Right! Thanks, Loretta!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Can we go home now?
:'''Loretta''': No! We're not stopping until the castle is ours. Charge!
:'''Lisa''': [[w:Visa|Visa]] or [[w:Mastercard|Mastercard]]?
:'''Loretta''': ''[gets stampeded over by his minions]'' I'm definitely over my credit limit...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Loretta''': Ha-haa! We've done it! We've finally broken through!
:'''Lisa''': And now it's time to use our nastiest weapons!
:'''Toast''': Yeah, dudes! Those weapons are pretty nasty, all right. But they're not as nasty as ours! Bring out the secret weapon!
:'''Lucky Bob''': One secret weapon coming up!
:''[Lucky Bob loads Big Fat Baby into the kids' catapult and Aka launches him. Big Fat Baby lands in the arms of Loretta.]''
:'''Lisa''': Awwww! Look at the cute little baby! Koochie koochie koo!
:''[Big Fat Baby farts suddenly, causing the invaders to become queasy and faint from the smell. The Kid Chorus comes out to look at them.]''
:'''Charity Bazaar''': I'm ''still'' not happy.
:'''Toast''': Hey, remember dudes, no matter how you fight your battles, war stinks!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[last lines of the show]
:'''All''': Should old acquaintance be forgot? / And never brought to mind? / We’ll take a cup of kindness yet for Auld Lang Syne. / For Auld Lang Syne, my dear / for auld lang syne, / farewell to thee from Histeria! / And days of Auld Lang Syne. [cheering]
:'''Father Time''': That’s a wrap!

== Unsorted quotes ==

:'''[[w:List of Histeria! characters#Froggo|Froggo]]''': Anybody got any lozenges?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[From a [[w:Kids' WB!|Kids' WB!]] promo]''
:'''Toast''': Watch ''Histeria!'', on Kids' W--
:'''Pepper Mills''': Hold it! &quot;His! His! His!&quot; It's always about guys! What about '''''Hers'''teria!''?
:'''Toast''': Whoa...
:'''Pepper Mills''': Like, you always hear about the fronitersmen. What happened to the frontiers''women''?
:'''Toast''': Whoa...
:'''Pepper Mills''': And Thomas Jeffer''son''? What about Thomas Jeffer's daughter?
:'''Toast''': I never thought of that. Hey, how about Florence Nightengale, and ''Lawrence'' Nightengale?
:'''Pepper Mills''': It's only fair!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[From another Kids' WB! promo]''
:'''Father Time''': For the greatest ideas in history, check out a library. But for the funniest idea in history, check out...
:'''Loud Kiddington''': ''HISTERIA!''
:'''World's Oldest Woman''': ''This is a library!''
:'''Others''': Shhhhhhhh!
:'''Father Time''': Watch ''Histeria!'', weekday mornings on Kids' WB!
:'''World's Oldest Woman''': ...at home, where you can laugh as loud as you want.
:'''Loud Kiddington''': BETTER!

== See also ==

* ''[[Tiny Toon Adventures]]''
* ''[[Animaniacs]]''
* ''[[Pinky and the Brain]]''
* ''[[Freakazoid!]]''
* ''[[Road Rovers]]''

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}


[[Category:1990s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2000s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated education TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical TV shows]]
[[Category:Time travel TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:The WB animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Kids' WB shows]]
[[Category:Television series by Warner Bros. Animation]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]</text>
      <sha1>jaeuvt6szvnqped2twnt13qjhmto4ba</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>July 15</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>26199</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965133</id>
      <parentid>3778955</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:07:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kalki</username>
        <id>71</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>update</comment>
      <origin>3965133</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="33148" sha1="6j5j23tg92r3s86weo90lwgpztx4tfb" xml:space="preserve">&lt;div id=&quot;15&quot; style=&quot;margin: 1em 0em; border: thin solid black; padding: 3px; background-color:#CFE5FF;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122); font: bold 14pt sans-serif;&quot;&gt;[[Category:Days]][[w:July 15|July 15]]&lt;/div&gt; &lt;noinclude&gt;'''Quotes of the day''' from previous years:&lt;/noinclude&gt;

; 2003
: Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so. ~ [[Bertrand Russell]]
:* selected by [[User:Nanobug|Nanobug]]

;2004
: Thar’s only two possibilities: Thar is life out there in the universe which is smarter than we are, or we’re the most intelligent life in the universe. Either way, it’s a mighty sobering thought. ~ [[Walt Kelly]]
:* selected by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]

; 2005
: Eternal vigilance must be maintained to guard against those who seek to stifle ideas, establish a narrow orthodoxy, and divide our nation along arbitrary lines of race, ethnicity, and religious belief or non-belief. ~ [[Jesse Ventura]] (born 15 July 1951)
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]

; 2006
: Patriotism is voluntary. It is a feeling of loyalty and allegiance that is the result of knowledge and belief. A patriot shows their patriotism through their actions, by their choice... No law will make a citizen a patriot. ~ [[Jesse Ventura]]
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 06:10, 14 July 2005 (UTC)
* 4 [[User:Jeffq|Jeff Q]]&amp;nbsp;[[User talk:Jeffq|(talk)]] 20:07, 11 July 2006 (UTC). Possibly trim down to the last two lines, or even the last sentence. [took yhis suggestion to the extent of trimming off &quot;I believe patriotism comes from the heart...&quot;] --&gt;

; 2007
: Love is the extremely difficult realisation that something other than oneself is real. Love, and so art and morals, is the discovery of reality. ~ [[Iris Murdoch]] (born 15 July 1919)
:* proposed by [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] &lt;!-- * 4 [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] 23:31, 14 July 2007 (UTC)
* '''[[User:Sceptre|Will]]''' &lt;sup&gt;{[[User talk:Sceptre|talk]])&lt;/sup&gt; 23:42, 14 July 2007 (UTC)
* 3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 00:03, 15 July 2007 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2008
: Try to put well in practice what you already know; and in so doing, you will in good time, discover the hidden things which you now inquire about. Practice what you know, and it will help to make clear what now you do not know. ~ [[Rembrandt]] (born 15 July 1606)
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] &lt;!-- * 4 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 00:03, 15 July 2007 (UTC)
* 3 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 06:19, 24 April 2008 (UTC)
* 3 [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] 23:32, 14 July 2008 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2009
: Choose only one master — Nature. ~ [[Rembrandt]]
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] &lt;!-- * 4 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 17:17, 14 July 2009 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;* 3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 00:03, 15 July 2007 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt;
* 2 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 06:19, 24 April 2008 (UTC)
* 3 [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] 23:32, 14 July 2008 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2010
: There is no document of civilization which is not at the same time a document of barbarism. ~ [[Walter Benjamin]]
:* proposed by [[User: Zarbon|Zarbon]] &lt;!-- * 3 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 05:13, 21 May 2008 (UTC)
* 4 [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] 23:32, 14 July 2008 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 17:17, 14 July 2009 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2011
: It is a curious thing, Harry, but perhaps those who are best suited to power are those who have never sought it. ~ [[J. K. Rowling]] in ''[[Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows]]'' (opening day of final film in the [[Harry Potter (series)|Harry Potter series]] 15 July 2011)
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] &lt;!-- * 4 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] ([[User talk:Kalki|talk]] &amp;middot; [[Special:Contributions/Kalki|contributions]]) 01:45, 3 July 2011 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2012
: {{quote of the day
| quote = There's a [[Greatness|great]] [[Necessity|need]] in our [[government]] right now for [[honesty]]. I speak my [[mind]]. You might not always like what you [[Hearing|hear]], but you're gonna hear it anyway. I call it like I see it; I tell the [[truth]]. And if I don't [[Knowledge|know]] something, I'll say so. Then I'll [[Effort|try]] to find the answer.
| author = Jesse Ventura
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] &lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 19:29, 6 July 2012 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 06:10, 14 July 2005 (UTC) with a strong lean toward 4.&lt;/s&gt;
* 3 [[User:Jeffq|Jeff Q]]&amp;nbsp;[[User talk:Jeffq|(talk)]] 20:07, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
* 3 [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] 23:31, 14 July 2007 (UTC)
* 1 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 06:19, 24 April 2008 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2013
{{quote of the day
| quote = This is how one pictures the [[angel]] of [[history]]. His [[face]] is turned toward the [[past]]. Where we perceive a chain of events, he sees one single catastrophe which keeps piling wreckage upon wreckage and hurls it in front of his feet. The angel would like to stay, awaken the [[dead]], and make whole what has been smashed. But a [[storm]] is blowing in from [[Paradise]]; it has got caught in his wings with such [[violence]] that the angel can no longer close them. This storm irresistibly propels him into the [[future]] to which his back is turned, while the pile of debris before him grows [[Sky|skyward]]. This storm is what we call [[progress]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] &lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 10:53, 13 July 2013 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] ([[User talk:Kalki|talk]] &amp;middot; [[Special:Contributions/Kalki|contributions]]) 11:17, 11 July 2010 (UTC) with a strong lean toward 4. * 4 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] ([[User talk:Kalki|talk]] &amp;middot; [[Special:Contributions/Kalki|contributions]]) 11:33, 11 July 2010 (UTC) &lt;/s&gt;
* 3 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2014
{{quote of the day
| quote = Only a thoughtless observer can deny that correspondences come into play between the [[world]] of modern [[technology]] and the archaic [[symbol]]-world of [[mythology]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 21:49, 13 July 2014 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] ([[User talk:Kalki|talk]] &amp;middot; [[Special:Contributions/Kalki|contributions]]) 11:17, 11 July 2010 (UTC) with a strong lean toward 4.&lt;/s&gt;
* 3 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2015
{{quote of the day
| quote = In every [[era]] the attempt must be made anew to wrest [[tradition]] away from a [[conformism]] that is about to overpower it. The [[Messiah]] comes not only as the [[redeemer]], he comes as the subduer of [[Antichrist]]. Only that [[historian]] will have the [[gift]] of fanning the spark of [[hope]] in the [[past]] who is firmly convinced that ''even the [[dead]]'' will not be safe from [[Evil|the enemy]] if he [[wins]]. And this enemy has not ceased to be [[victorious]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 10:36, 14 July 2015 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2016
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; In the fields with which we are concerned [[knowledge]] [[exists]] only in [[lightning]] flashes. The text is the [[thunder]] rolling long afterwards.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 07:49, 14 July 2016 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 10:36, 14 July 2015 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2017
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; We [[know]] that the [[Jews]] were prohibited from [[investigating]] the [[future]]. The [[w:Torah|Torah]] and the [[prayers]] instruct them in [[remembrance]], however. This stripped the future of its [[magic]], to which all those succumb who turn to the soothsayers for [[enlightenment]]. This did not imply, however, that for the Jews the future turned into homogeneous empty time. For every second of [[time]] was the strait gate through which the [[Messiah]] might enter.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 23:53, 14 July 2017 (UTC) &lt;s&gt; 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 10:36, 14 July 2015 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2018
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; To articulate what is [[past]] does not mean to recognize &quot;how it really was.&quot; It means to take control of a [[memory]], as it flashes in a [[moment]] of [[danger]]. For [[historical]] [[materialism]] it is a question of holding fast to a picture of the past, just as if it had unexpectedly thrust itself, in a [[Crisis|moment of danger]], on the historical subject. The danger threatens the stock of [[tradition]] as much as its recipients. For both it is one and the same: handing itself over as the tool of the [[ruling]] [[classes]]. In every epoch, the attempt must be made to deliver tradition anew from the [[conformism]] which is on the point of overwhelming it. For the [[Messiah]] arrives not merely as the [[Redeemer]]; he also arrives as the vanquisher of the [[w:Anti-christ|Anti-christ]]. The only writer of history with the gift of setting alight the sparks of [[hope]] in the past, is the one who is convinced of this: that not even the [[dead]] will be [[safe]] from the [[enemy]], if he is [[victorious]]. And this enemy has not ceased to be victorious.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 23:29, 14 July 2018 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;g3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:27, 15 July 2017 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2019
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; Every [[expression]] of [[human]] [[mental]] [[life]] can be understood as a kind of [[language]], and this [[understanding]], in the manner of a [[true]] [[method]], everywhere raises new [[questions]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:17, 15 July 2019 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:11, 15 July 2018 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2020
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; In what [[time]] does man [[live]]? The thinkers have always [[known]] that he does not live in any time at all. The [[immortality]] of [[thoughts]] and [[deeds]] banishes him to a timeless realm at whose [[heart]] an inscrutable [[death]] lies in wait. ... Devoured by the countless demands of the [[moment]], time slipped away from him; the medium in which the pure melody of his [[youth]] would swell was destroyed. The fulfilled [[tranquility]] in which his late [[maturity]] would ripen was stolen from him. It was purloined by everyday [[reality]], which, with its [[events]], [[chance]] occurrences, and [[obligations]], disrupted the myriad opportunities of youthful time, immortal time. ... From day to day, second to second, the [[self]] preserves itself, clinging to that instrument: time, the instrument that it was supposed to play.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 03:52, 15 July 2020 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:11, 15 July 2018 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2021
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; All [[purposeful]] manifestations of [[life]], including their very purposiveness, in the final [[analysis]] have their [[end]] not in life but in the expression of its [[nature]], in the representation of its [[significance]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 23:44, 14 July 2021 (UTC) &lt;s&gt; 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 23:52, 14 July 2018 (UTC) &lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2022
{{quote of the day
| quote =  &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; A [[painting]] is [[finished]] when the [[artist]] says [[w:Sayings_of_Jesus_on_the_cross#6._It_is_finished|it is finished]].
| author = Rembrandt
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 19:29, 14 July 2022 (UTC) &lt;s&gt; 3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] ([[User talk:Kalki|talk]] &amp;middot; [[Special:Contributions/Kalki|contributions]]) 11:33, 11 July 2010 (UTC) &lt;/s&gt; 
* 3 [[User:Pajicz|Pajicz]] ([[User talk:Pajicz|talk]]) 12:35, 8 April 2013 (UTC) Strong, but simple.
* 3 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2023
{{quote of the day
| quote =  &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; Because he never raises his eyes to the [[great]] and the [[meaningful]], [[Philistinism|the philistine]] has taken [[experience]] as his [[gospel]]. It has become for him a [[message]] about [[life]]'s commonness. But he has never grasped that there [[exists]] something other than experience, that there are [[values]] — inexperienceable — which we [[serve]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:34, 15 July 2023 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 23:52, 14 July 2018 (UTC)&lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2024
{{quote of the day
| quote =  &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; The [[choice]] we make in [[2024 United States presidential election|this election]] will shape the [[future]] of [[America]] and the [[world]] for decades to come. I [[believe]] that with all my [[soul]]. I know that millions of my fellow Americans believe it as well. And some have a different view as to the direction our country should take. Disagreement is inevitable in American [[democracy]]. It is part of [[human nature]]. [[Politics]] must never be a killing field. I believe politics ought to be an arena for [[peaceful]] [[debate]], to pursue [[justice]], to make decisions guided by the [[Declaration of Independence]] and [[United States Constitution|our constitution]]. We stand for an America not of extremism and fury, but of [[decency]] and [[grace]]. All of us now face a time of [[testing]] as the election approaches. The higher the stakes, the more fervent the [[passion]] becomes. This places an added burden on each of us to ensure no matter how strong our convictions, we must never descend into [[violence]].
| author = Joe Biden
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:27, 15 July 2024 (UTC); recent remarks on recent events --&gt; 

; 2025
{{quote of the day
| quote =  &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt; The [[tradition]] of the [[oppressed]] [[teaches]] us that the &quot;state of emergency&quot; in which we live is not the exception but the [[rule]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 4 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 23:52, 14 July 2025 (UTC) &lt;s&gt;3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 10:36, 14 July 2015 (UTC) &lt;/s&gt; --&gt;

; 2026
{{quote of the day
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt;There is a [[secret]] agreement between [[past]] [[generations]] and the [[present]] one. Our coming was expected on [[earth]]. Like every generation that preceded us, we have been endowed with a [[weak]] [[Messianic]] [[power]], a power to which the past has a claim. That claim cannot be settled cheaply.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
:* proposed by [[User:Kalki|Kalki]]&lt;!-- * 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:27, 15 July 2017 (UTC) --&gt;

; 2027 : ''[[July 15|Rank or add further suggestions…]]''
----
&lt;noinclude&gt;
&lt;!-- ----
'''Quotes by people born this day, already used as QOTD:''' --&gt; 
----
{{QOTD Ranking}}
----
----

== Suggestions ==

More glorious to merit a sceptre than to possess one ~ [[Napoleon Bonaparte]] who surrendered on July 15th.
* 3 ~ [[User:MosheZadka|MosheZadka]] [[User talk:MosheZadka|(Talk)]] 09:06, 25 Jun 2005 (UTC)
* 1 [[User:Jeffq|Jeff Q]]&amp;nbsp;[[User talk:Jeffq|(talk)]] 20:07, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
* 2 '''[[User:Sceptre|Will]]''' &lt;sup&gt;{[[User talk:Sceptre|talk]])&lt;/sup&gt; 23:42, 14 July 2007 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 06:19, 24 April 2008 (UTC)
* 2 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

A king should sacrifice the best affections of his heart for the good of his country; no sacrifice should be above his determination. ~ [[Napoleon Bonaparte]]
* 3 [[User:AllanHainey|AllanHainey]] June 27, 2005 11:40 (UTC)
* 3 [[User:Jeffq|Jeff Q]]&amp;nbsp;[[User talk:Jeffq|(talk)]] 20:07, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
* 3 '''[[User:Sceptre|Will]]''' &lt;sup&gt;{[[User talk:Sceptre|talk]])&lt;/sup&gt; 23:42, 14 July 2007 (UTC)
* 1 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 06:19, 24 April 2008 (UTC)
* 3 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

I ran for governor to find out if the American dream still exists in anyone's heart other than mine. I'm living proof that the myths aren't true. The candidate with the most money isn't always the one who wins. You don't have to be a career politician to serve in public office. ~ [[Jesse Ventura]] (date of birth)
* 3 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 06:10, 14 July 2005 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:Jeffq|Jeff Q]]&amp;nbsp;[[User talk:Jeffq|(talk)]] 20:07, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:InvisibleSun|InvisibleSun]] 23:31, 14 July 2007 (UTC)
* 1 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 06:19, 24 April 2008 (UTC)
* 2.5 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

A well-wrapped statistic is better than Hitler's &quot;big lie&quot;; it misleads, yet it cannot be pinned on you. ~ [[How to Lie with Statistics|Darrell Huff]] (date of birth)
* 3 [[User:Ningauble|Ningauble]] 17:22, 30 October 2008 (UTC)
* 1 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 05:03, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 17:17, 14 July 2009 (UTC) with a lean toward 3.
* 3 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

There is terror in numbers... Perhaps we suffer from a trauma induced by grade-school arithmetic. ~ [[How to Lie with Statistics|Darrell Huff]] (date of birth)
* 3 [[User:Ningauble|Ningauble]] 17:22, 30 October 2008 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 05:03, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
* 2 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 17:17, 14 July 2009 (UTC)
* 2 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man ~ [[Samuel Johnson|Dr Johnson]]
: {{unsigned|D is for d}}
* 1 [[User:Kalki|Kalki]] 22:33, 14 July 2009 (UTC) no clear relation to the date
* 2 if it is on the correct date. - [[User:Zarbon|Zarbon]] 18:13, 21 August 2009 (UTC)
* 2 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

If you can't prove what you want to prove, demonstrate something else and pretend they are the same thing. In the daze that follows the collision of statistics with the human mind, hardly anyone will notice the difference. ~ [[How to Lie with Statistics|Darrell Huff]]
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 19:29, 6 July 2012 (UTC) with a lean toward 4.
* 3 //[[User:Gbern3|Gbern3]] ([[User talk:Gbern3|talk]]) 07:33, 10 July 2013 (UTC)

----

{{quote of the day
| quote = Everyone who achieves strives for totality, and the value of his achievement lies in that totality — that is, in the fact that the whole, undivided nature of a human being should be expressed in his achievement. But when determined by our society, as we see it today, achievement does not express a totality; it is completely fragmented and derivative. It is not uncommon for the community to be the site where a joint and covert struggle is waged against higher ambitions and more personal goals. ... The socially relevant achievement of the average person serves in the vast majority of cases to repress the original and nonderivative, inner aspirations of the human being.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:11, 15 July 2018 (UTC)

----

{{quote of the day
| quote = The enslavement of language in prattle is joined by the enslavement of things in folly almost as its inevitable consequence.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:11, 15 July 2018 (UTC)

----

{{quote of the day
| quote = Of all the ways of acquiring books, writing them oneself is regarded as the most praiseworthy method. … Writers are really people who write books not because they are poor, but because they are dissatisfied with the books which they could buy but do not like.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver;&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:11, 15 July 2018 (UTC)

----

{{quote of the day
| quote = The true sign of decadence is not the collusion of the university and the state (something that is by no means incompatible with honest barbarity), but the theory and guarantee of academic freedom, when in reality people assume with brutal simplicity that the aim of study is to steer its disciples to a socially conceived individuality.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----

{{quote of the day
| quote = The destructive character knows only one watchword: make room. And only one activity: clearing away. His need for fresh air and open space is stronger than any hatred. 
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = For the Romantics and for speculative philosophy, ... to be critical meant to elevate thinking so far beyond all restrictive conditions that the knowledge of truth sprang forth magically, as it were, from insight into the falsehood of these restrictions.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = The critic does not pass judgment on the work; rather, art itself passes judgment, either by taking up the work in the medium of criticism or by rejecting it and thereby appraising it as beneath all criticism.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = One might, for example, speak of an unforgettable life or moment even if all men had forgotten it. If the nature of such a life or moment required that it be unforgotten, that predicate would imply not a falsehood but merely a claim unfulfilled by men, and probably also a reference to a realm in which it is fulfilled: God's remembrance.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = All purposeful manifestations of life, including their very purposiveness, in the final analysis have their end not in life but in the expression of its nature, in the representation of its significance.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = Capitalism is presumably the first case of a blaming, rather than a repenting cult. ... An enormous feeling of guilt not itself knowing how to repent, grasps at the cult, not in order to repent for this guilt, but to make it universal, to hammer it into consciousness and finally and above all to include God himself in this guilt.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = Where the presence of truth should be possible, it can be possible solely under the condition of the recognition of myth—that is, the recognition of its crushing indifference to truth.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = A curious paradox: people have only the narrowest private interest in mind when they act, yet they are at the same time more than ever determined in their behavior by the instincts of the mass. ... The diversity of individual goals is immaterial in face of the identity of the determining forces. 
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = [[Nothing]] that has ever happened should be regarded as lost for [[history]]. To be sure, only a redeemed mankind receives the fullness of its past — which is to say, only a redeemed mankind has its past become citable in all its moments. Each moment it has lived becomes a ''citation à l'ordre du jour'' — and that day is [[Judgement Day]].
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----
{{quote of the day
| quote = History breaks down in images not into stories.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}
* 3 &lt;span style= &quot;border-radius:99em;color:white;background:silver&quot;&gt;♞[[User:Kalki/Kalkiswords|☤]][[User:Kalki/Magic|☮]]♌︎[[User:Kalki|Kalki]] [[User talk:Kalki|⚚]][[User:Kalki/index|⚓︎]]⊙[[User:Kalki/Chronology|☳]][[User:Kalki/Vox Box|☶]]⚡&lt;/span&gt; 00:44, 15 July 2025 (UTC)

----

&lt;!-- interwiki start --&gt;

&lt;!-- interwiki end --&gt;
&lt;/noinclude&gt;</text>
      <sha1>6j5j23tg92r3s86weo90lwgpztx4tfb</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Talk:Pornography</title>
    <ns>1</ns>
    <id>29854</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965260</id>
      <parentid>2866425</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:51:30Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39936-19</username>
        <id>3350229</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* is not good */ new section</comment>
      <origin>3965260</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3255" sha1="5jjk7b24y3f2xlrssvzjdxg5n4dvnc4" xml:space="preserve">This seems slightly one sided.
*Slightly? 25 out of 30 entries state the same idea &quot;rape = pornography&quot; and most of them are by the same author stating that same idea over and over.

== Unsourced ==
* No one knows what pornography is. Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thought, that's their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thought. Hmm. Sounds like... every commercial on television, doesn't it? You know, when I see those two twins on that Doublemint commercial - I'm not thinking of gum. I am thinking of chewing, maybe that's the connection they're trying to make.
**[[Bill Hicks]]

* Obscenity is a cleansing process, whereas pornography only adds to the murk.
** attributed to [[Henry Miller]]

* Pornography is pornography, what is there to see? Movies are attempting to destroy something that's supposed to be the most beautiful thing a man and a woman can have by making it cheap and common. It's what you don't see that's attractive.
**[[Nancy Reagan]]

* Pornography is in the loin of the beholder.
**[[w:Charles Rembar|Charles Rembar]]

* When we fall for arguments against pornography or &quot;obscenity&quot;, we hand repressive agents the tool for censoring our speech. It is not their speech – their remarkably sexist speech – that will be censored; it is our own. Because the view that women really do own, and have a right to control, our own bodies and our own sexuality is still a subversive and modern idea, and the legislators who support &quot;decency&quot; legislation don't like our idea very much. These are people who believe that women's liberation is the very Devil himself. Don't let them exploit your fears to fuel their repressions.
**[[w:Avedon Carol|Avedon Carol]]

* Feminists are often asked whether pornography causes rape. The fact is that rape and prostitution caused and continue to cause pornography. Politically, culturally, socially, sexually, and economically, rape and prostitution generated pornography; and pornography depends for its continued existence on the rape and prostitution of women.
**[[Andrea Dworkin]]

* Women, for centuries not having access to pornography and now unable to bear looking at the muck on the supermarket shelves, are astonished. Women do not believe that men believe what pornography says about women. But they do. From the worst to the best of them, they do.
**[[Andrea Dworkin]]

* Pornography is the orchestrated destruction of women's bodies and souls; rape, battery, incest, and prostitution animate it; dehumanization and sadism characterize it; it is war on women, serial assaults on dignity, identity, and human worth; it is tyranny. Each woman who has survived knows from the experience of her own life that pornography is captivity -- the woman trapped in the picture used on the woman trapped wherever he's got her.
**[[Andrea Dworkin]]

* Pornography is literature designed to be read with one hand.
**[[w:Angela Lambert|Angela Lambert]] (1990)

* The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
**[[w: Gloria Leonard|Gloria Leonard]]

== is not good  ==

@Áç [[Special:Contributions/&amp;#126;2026-39936-19|&amp;#126;2026-39936-19]] ([[User talk:&amp;#126;2026-39936-19|talk]]) 10:51, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>5jjk7b24y3f2xlrssvzjdxg5n4dvnc4</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Matilda (film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>30675</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964848</id>
      <parentid>3960695</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:35:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964848</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="83727" sha1="g40hvhfrquz2u0l3iwqfer76aimdp0z" xml:space="preserve">'''''[[w:Matilda (1996 film)|Matilda]]''''' is an American [[w:1996 in film|1996]] [[w:fantasy film|fantasy]] [[w:comedy film|comedy]] film about a young girl who is extremely smart and loves reading and who has difficulties in life in the form of her disapproving parents Harry and Zinnia and her brother Michael Wormwood plus her terrifying headmistress at school. Matilda soon finds that she has telekinetic powers which allow her to control things with her mind.
:''Directed by [[w:Danny DeVito|Danny DeVito]] and written by [[w:Nicholas Kazan|Nicholas Kazan]] and [[w:Robin Swicord|Robin Swicord]], based on the [[w:Matilda (novel)|novel of the same name]] by [[Roald Dahl]].''
{{center|'''Somewhere inside all of us is the power to change the world.'''}}

== [[w:Matilda Wormwood|Matilda]] ==
* No more Ms. Nice Girl.
* Check it if you don't believe me.
* I really hope you have a search warrant. According to a constitutional law book that I read in the library, if you don't have one, you could lose your job or even go to federal prison.
* The young woman is you!
* But don't people need good cars? Can't you sell good cars, Dad?
* Just kidding.
* For what, Miss Trunchbull?
* You're very brave, Miss Honey.
* Miss Trunchbull kept the whole school late because a boy ate some chocolate cake.

== Harry Wormwood ==
* I did not glue my hat to my head! The hat shrunk! The fibers fused to my hair!
* The library? You've never set foot in a library. You're only four years old.
* Get in the car, Melinda!
* You're a Wormwood, you start acting like one! Sit up and look at the TV!
* What're they gonna do? Repossess the kid?
* I'm great. I'm incredible. Michael, pencil and paper in the kitchen.

== Zinnia Wormwood ==
* Mine are driving me crazy. I'll tell ya, six hours a day of school is not enough.
* ''[cutting off Harry's hat with scissors]'' I still don't see how you glued your hat on, Harry. I mean, I know you say you didn't, but obviously, you did.
* Harry! I won! I won! I hit the double bingo! Come on, everybody. I'm taking you all to Café Le Ritz.
* Look, Miss Snit, a girl does not get anywhere by acting intelligent! I mean, take a look at you and me. You chose books - I chose looks. I have a nice house, a wonderful husband... and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs. You want Matilda to go to college? 

== Miss Jennifer &quot;Jenny&quot; Honey ==
* Because she's a spectacularly wonderful child and I love her.
* Photographs of my mother and father, and a beautiful doll my mother gave me with a china face. Lissy Doll, I called her. Would you like some milk?
* Miss Trunchbull, ''I'' was the one who was at your house last night. I know that I-- ''['''Miss Trunchbull''': I broke your arm once before, I can do it again, Jenny.]'' I am ''&lt;span style=color:red&gt;not&lt;/span&gt;'' seven years old anymore, Aunt Trunchbull.
* Okay, listen up, everybody. Have a new student with us today. This is Matilda Wormwood. I'd like ''you'' to sit here with Lavender.
* I'd be happy to walk her home. ''['''Zinnia''': Well, nobody will be there. We're moving to [[w:Guam|Guam]]. Come on. Let's go.]'' Guam?

== [[w:Miss Trunchbull|Trunchbull]] ==
* I need a car that is inexpensive, but reliable. Can you service me? ''['''Harry''': As a matter of speaking, yes. Welcome to Wormwood Motors. Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, whatever.]'' Agatha Trunchbull, principal, Crunchem Hall Elementary School. I warned you, sir. I want a tight car, because I'm on a tight ship. ''['''Harry''': Oh yeah, huh? Uh…]'' My school is a model of discipline. &quot;Use the rod, beat the child&quot;. That's my motto. ''['''Harry''': Terrific motto.]'' Do you have any brats for yourself? ''['''Harry''': Yeah, I got a boy, Mikey, and one mistake, Matilda.]'' They're all mistakes, children. Filthy and nasty things. I'm glad I never was one. ''['''Harry''': Uh-huh. Well, since you're an educator, I'm gonna make you a great deal.]'' You'd better. ''['''Harry''': Let's do business!]''
* The distance the shot put goes depends upon the effort you put into it! ''PERSPIRATION!''
* Hop to, hippity-hop! The entire school will go to the assembly room, immediately. ''Sit!''
* Shut up! The entire school will stay another ''FIVE HOURS'' after school and copy from the dictionary! Any child who object will go straight into the Chokey... '''''TOGETHER!'''''
* Useless flaming CAR! ''[storms towards Matilda]'' '''Wormwood!''' Sell me a lemon? ''[drags her through the hallways]'' You're heading for the ''Chokey,'' young lady! ''['''Matilda''': The Chokey?!]'' Teach you a lesson! ''['''Matilda''': What lesson?!]'' You and your father think you can make a fool out of me! ''['''Matilda''': My father?]'' The guy with the stupid haircut! ''['''Matilda''': I'm nothing like my father!]'' You're the spitting image! The [[apple]] never rots far from the [[tree]]!
* '''''WHY''''' are all these women '''married?!''' Mrs. D? Mrs. I? You're supposed to be teaching ''spelling'', not [[poetry]]!
* ''[the kids giggle as they notice the newt in her glass of water]'' What’s funny? Hmm? Well, spit it out! Speak up! I like a joke as well as the next fat person!
* ''[to Matilda]'' You're a liar and a scoundrel, and your father's a liar and a cheat! You're the most corrupt lowlifes in the history of civilization! Am I wrong? I'm ''never'' wrong! In this classroom, in this school, I AM ''GOD!''
* I'll be watching you, each and every one. When you turn the corner, when you go to your little cubbies to get your smelly little coats, when you skip merrily to lunch, I'll be watching you. ''All'' of you! ''[pointing at Matilda]'' And ''especially'' you!
* ''[on phone to Harry] '''WORMWOOD!''''' You useless used-car salesman scum, I want you around here NOW! With another car! Yes, I know what ''caveat emptor'' means, you lowlife liar! I'm gonna sue you, I'm gonna burn down your showroom, I'm gonna take that no-good jalopy you sold me and '''''SHOVE IT UP YOUR BAZOOKA!''''' When I'm finished with you, you're gonna look like ROADKILL! You what?
* I am here to teach you all a lesson! ''[forcefully pushes a set of desks into the wall]'' Sometimes in life, horrible and unexplainable things happen. ''[kicks more desks into the wall]'' These things are a test of character! ''[pushes more desks into the wall]'' And I have character!
* ''You…'' will be put away in a place where not even the crows can land their droppings on you!

== Lavender ==
* The Trunchbull used to be in the Olympics: Shot-put, javelin, hammer throw. The hammer throw was her specialty.

== Bruce Bogtrotter ==
* I don't know what you're talking about.
* Well, it's hard for me to remember a specific cake.

== Michael &quot;Mikey&quot; Wormwood ==
* Could you repeat the last one?
* Give me the cookies.
* Bummer.
* Hey, dip face, Have carrot!
* ''[throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown]'' Hey, Dip face. Have a marshmallow. Have another marshmallow, Dip face. Dip face!

== Others ==
:'''Cookie''': Entire confection.
:'''Amanda''': My mommy thinks they're sweet.
:'''Mrs. Phelps''': In that room right over there. Would you like me to pick you out one with lots of pictures in it?
:'''Hortensia''': You squirts better skedaddle. I'm not kidding. The Trunchbull likes to snap a whip in there to see who's trying to hide.
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': I've got 9:18.
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': [into recorder] 9:17 is correct.
:'''Mickey''': Are you ready to get sticky with Mickey?

== Dialogue ==
:''[We start with a close-up of a baby girl's face as the camera then pulls back from her. She's in a nursery room in a hospital]''
:'''Narrator''': ''[first lines]'' Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. Some will grow to be butchers or bakers or candlestick makers. Some will only be really good at making a Jell-O salad. One way or another, though, every human being is unique, for better or for worse. ''[a nurse picks up the baby girl and shows her to a man, who grumbles and walks off]'' Most parents believe that their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. Others take a less emotional approach.
:''[Outside, adults look at their newborns. The man, Harry Wormwood, walks beside his wife, Zinnia Wormwood]''
:'''Harry''': What a waste of time.
:'''Zinnia''': And painful.
:'''Harry''': And expensive! $9.25 for a bar of soap?
:'''Zinnia''': Well, I had to take a shower, Harry.
:'''Harry''': $5,000?! I'm not paying it! What are they gonna do, repossess the kid? ''[puts the baby girl in the back of his car. Looking back at her, a boy named Michael Wormwood, Harry and Zinna's son, waves a toy, making her anxious. Harry jerks the car forward, causing the baby girl to slide. He hits the gas pedal, causing the baby girl to slide back]'' There's no way out.
:'''Zinnia''': Make a U-turn. ''[as Harry makes different turns in every direction, the baby girl looks dizzy]'' Harry!
:'''Harry''': All right.
:''[The car speeds over speedbumps]''
:'''Zinnia''': ''[voice vibrating]'' Harry!
:''[Later, in a neighborhood]''
:'''Boy''': The Wormwood guy is back!
:'''Narrator''': Harry and Zinnia Wormwood lived in a very nice neighborhood, in a very nice house. But they were not really very nice people.
:''[The Wormwoods arrive at their home]''
:'''Harry''': Get outta the street, ya little dodos!
:''[As the family enter the house, the baby girl is still in the car]''
:'''Narrator''': The Wormwoods were so wrapped up in their own silly lives that they barely noticed that they had a daughter. Had they paid attention to her at all they'd have realized she was a rather extraordinary child.
:''[The baby girl is sitting on the night bar]''
:'''Zinnia''': Oh, my gosh, Matilda, now look what you did!
:'''Narrator''': They named her Matilda.
:''[As Matilda writes her name on green baby food, Zinnia wipes it off]''
:'''Zinnia''': You're supposed to eat the spinach. Ew! Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew! ''[picks her up and puts her in the sink]'' Babies. You're better off raising tomatoes!
:''[Matilda, now older, wipes her face with a rag]''
:'''Narrator''': By the time she was 2 years old, Matilda had learned what most people learn in their early 30s: How to take care of herself. ''[Now 4 years old, Matilda gets dressed]'' As time went by, she developed a sense of style. Every morning, Matilda's older brother, Michael, went to school.
:'''Michael''': Bye, Mom!
:'''Zinnia''': Get outta here.
:'''Narrator''': Her father went to work, selling used cars for unfair prices.
:'''Zinnia''': Make money.
:'''Narrator''': And her mother took off to play Bingo.
:'''Zinnia''': Soup's on the stove. Heat it up if you get hungry.
:''[As each of the Wormwoods leave, Matilda watches]''
:'''Narrator''': Matilda was left alone. That was how she liked it.
:''[As the background song &quot;[[w:Send Me on My Way|Send Me on My Way]]&quot; by [[w:Rusted Root|Rusted Root]] plays, she then turns to the can of soup and throws it away. Later, she cracks some eggs into a bowl, places some flour in and mixes them all together with a hand mixer. Next, she pours the mixture into pancake sizes on a pan on the stove. Once the sides of the pancakes are cooked, she flips them over. Later, she flips them out of the pan where they land on a plate. She lifts the plate up, places a flower in a small vase and begins to eat her nicely cooked pancakes whilst reading some magazines.]''
:'''Narrator''': By the time she was four, Matilda had read every magazine in the house. ''[The scene changes to the living room where the family are watching TV, Matilda walks up to her father]'' One night she got up her courage and asked her father for something she desperately wanted.
:'''Harry''': A book? What do you want a book for?
:'''Matilda''': To read.
:'''Harry''': To read? Why would you wanna read when you got the television set sittin’ right in front of ya? There's nothin’ you can get from a book that you can't get from a television faster.
:''[Michael, who is struggling to watch the TV because his sister is in his view, leans and drags her out of his view.]''
:'''Michael''': Get out of the way!
:''[Matilda watches with displeasure as her family is not going to listen. Harry briefly belches.]''
:'''Narrator''': Matilda already knew that she was somewhat different from her family. She saw that whatever she needed in this world, she'd have to get herself.
:''[The scene changes where Matilda watches her family leave the house that morning.]''
:'''Harry''': Bye!
:'''Zinnia''': Ciao! ''[to Matilda]'' There's fish fingers in the microwave. ''[leaves]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': The next morning, after her parents left, Matilda set off in search of a book.
:'''Matilda''': Where's are the children's [[book]]s, please?
:'''Mrs. Phelps''': In that room right over there. Would you like me to pick you out one with lots of pictures in it?
:'''Matilda''': No, thank you. I'm sure I can manage.
:''[She walks to the room as Mrs. Phelps looks on with surprise. Matilda arrives in the children's books section and picks a book, before she sits on a small comfy chair and starts to read it. The next day shows Matilda walking to the traffic lights, where they turned green to allow pedestrians to cross the road. She walks to the library and reads another book.]''
:'''Narrator''': From then on, every day, as soon as her mother went to bingo, Matilda walked the ten blocks to the library, and devoured one book after another. ''[She giggles upon reading, as Mrs. Phelps hears her whilst working. Matilda places some books on a table, before she puts them back.]'' When she finished all the children's books, she started wandering around in search of something else. Mrs. Phelps, who had been watching her with fascination for the past few weeks, offered Matilda some valuable library information.
:''[Mrs. Phelps watches Matilda looking around the library and decides to talk to her. The next scene shows them talking in another section of the library.]''
:'''Mrs. Phelps''': You know, you can have your very own library card, and then you could take books home, and you wouldn't have to walk here every day. You can take home as many as you'd like.
:'''Matilda''': That would be wonderful.
:''[The next scene shows Matilda carrying a number of books in her pull wagon. The shot fades to show that different books are placed in the wagon.]''
:'''Narrator''': So, Matilda's strong, young mind continued to grow, nurtured by the voices of all those authors who had sent their books out into the world, like ships onto the sea. ''[As the 4-year-old Matilda walks in the park with her wagon, the shot fades to the 6-year-old Matilda still walking in the park.]'' These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message; you are not alone.
:''[She watches some children playing in a playground before she sits under a tree and reads her book. The scene changes where Matilda is reading &quot;Ivanhoe&quot; in her bedroom as Harry opens the door.]''
:'''Harry''': Any packages come today?
:'''Matilda''': Mm-mm.
:'''Harry''': ''[about the books]'' Where'd all this come from?
:'''Matilda''': The library.
:'''Harry''': The library?! You've never set foot in the library, you're only four years old!
:'''Matilda''': I'm six and a half.
:'''Harry''': You're four!
:'''Matilda''': Six and a half.
:'''Harry''': If you were six and a half, you'd be in [[school]] already!
:'''Matilda''': I want to be in school. I told you I was supposed to start school in September. You wouldn't listen.
:'''Harry''': ''[grabs his daughter's arm and drags her out of her bedroom]'' Get up! Get up! Get out here. Give me that book. ''[takes his daughter's book and throws it on the ground aside, briefly catching his son's attention. Harry takes his daughter to their bedroom where his wife is applying peroxide in her hair]'' Dearest pie, how old is Matilda?
:'''Zinnia''': Four.
:'''Matilda''': I'm six and a half, Mommy.
:'''Zinnia''': Five, then.
:'''Matilda''': I was six in August.
:'''Harry''': You're a liar.
:'''Matilda''': I wanna go to school.
:''[Zinnia snickers]''
:'''Harry''': ''[scoffs]'' School! It's out of the question. Who would be here to sign for the packages? ''[applies his hair tonic into his hair]'' We can't leave valuable packages sitting on the doorstep. Now go watch TV like a good kid.
:''[Matilda begins to look upset and turns to leave]''
:'''Zinnia''': You know, sometimes I think there's something wrong with that girl.
:'''Harry''': Hm. Tell me about it.
:''[In the hallway:]''
:'''Michael''': Hey, dipface! ''[throws some marshmallows at at Matilda, as she walks to her bedroom, ignoring his brother]'' Have a marshmallow. Have another marshmallow, dipface! Dipface! 
:''[his sister goes to her room and closes the door]''
:''[in her bedroom, some teardrops fall onto one of the pages in a book as Matilda is sobbing a bit. She hugs her doll]'''
:'''Narrator''': Sometimes Matilda longed for a friend, someone like the kind, courageous people in her books. ''[she closes the book and gazes at the front cover where it shows the illustration of Ivanhoe]'' It occurred to her that, like talking dragons and princesses with hair long enough to climb, such people might exist only in storybooks. But Matilda was about to discover that she could be her own friend, ''[the next scene shows Harry joyfully running to the house, laughing]'' that she had a kind of strength that she wasn't even aware of.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Harry''': ''[goes into the house, smiling]'' I'm great! I'm incredible! Michael, pencil and paper, in the kitchen.
:'''Zinnia''': Did we sell some cars today, honeydew?
:'''Harry''': Did we! ''[kisses his wife as his son grabs a notebook and a pencil]''
:'''Zinnia''': ''[as she, her husband, and her son walk to the table where her daughter is reading a book]'' Does that mean I can get that new TV?
:'''Harry''': Yeah! Son, one day, you're gonna have to earn your own living. And it's time that you've learned the family business. Sit down, and write this down. 
:''[Michael sits down and starts writing]'' 
:'''Harry''': All right. The first car that your brilliant father sold cost $320. I sold it for $1,158. The second one costs $512. I sold it for $2,269!
:'''Michael''': Wait, Dad, you're going too fast.
:'''Harry''': Just write. The third cost $68. I sold it for $999! And the fourth cost $1,100. I sold it for 7,839 big American boffos!
:'''Zinnia''': Harry! :''[kisses her husband]''
:'''Harry''': What's my profit for the day?
:'''Michael''': Could you repeat the last one-?
:'''Matilda''': $10,265.
:''[Harry, Zinnia and Michael staring at her]'' 
:'''Matilda''': Check it if you don't believe me.
:'''Harry''': ''[checks the paper with Zinnia and Michael]'' You're a little cheat, you saw the paper.
:'''Matilda''': From all the way over here?
:'''Harry''': ''[confused]'' Are you being smart with me? ''[angrily approaches Matilda and points his finger at her]'' If you're being smart with me, young lady, you're gonna be punished.
:'''Matilda''': Punished for being smart?
:'''Harry''': ''[angrily]'' For being a smart aleck! ''[leans down to her level]'' When a person is bad, that person has to be taught a lesson.
:'''Matilda''': ''[confused]'' &quot;Person&quot;?
:'''Harry''': Get up! Get up! Go on! ''[pulls Matilda's ear, drags her to her room, and shuts the door]''
:'''Narrator''': Harry Wormwood had unintentionally given his daughter the first practical advice she could use. He meant to say, &quot;When a ''child'' is bad&quot;. Instead he said, &quot;When a ''person'' is bad&quot;, and thereby introduced a revolutionary idea: that children could punish their parents. Only when they deserved it, of course.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Matilda looks at the alarm clock on the side table. Then, she quietly sneaks over to the makeup salon. Matilda spots her father's hair tonic which is &quot;Oil of Violets&quot; and grabs it. Then, she looks around and sees her mother's peroxide bottle. She then pours out some of the hair tonic, but leaves enough in. She looks back to see if her parents are waking up, but they aren't. Matilda finishes placing some of the peroxide into the hair tonic. Just as she is screwing the cap back on, the alarm clock goes off. Harry turns it off and slowly gets up just as Matilda puts the hair tonic and the peroxide back. She looks to see if Harry notices her, but he didn't. Then, she crawls into another room unnoticed just as Harry begins to cough. Harry then walks from the bed and into the bathroom. Matilda sees if the coast is clear and then plans to make her escape, but Zinnia shoots up from the bed. Matilda makes a quiet gasp, but Zinnia still had her eye-mask on, and Matilda quietly sighs in relief and leaves the room, before Zinnia takes off her eye-mask. Harry grabs his bottle of hair tonic.]''
:'''Harry''': Michael, come into my room!
:''[he sprinkles some hair tonic onto his scalp]''
:'''Michael''': What?
:'''Harry''': My boy! Today's the day I take you to the shop. What do ya say?
:'''Michael''': I don't know. What do you say, Dad?
:'''Harry''': I say appearance is nine-tenths of the law. People don't buy a car. They buy me. Which is why I take such good care of myself. Well-oiled hair. Clean shaved. Snappy suit. Now run along and get ready for a big day of learning, kid. And it's gonna be a big day of learning, too. There's a sucker born every minute, and we're gonna take 'em for all they've got.
:'''Michael''': Give me the [[w:cookie|cookie]]s.
:'''Zinnia''': Here.
:''[Matilda puts peroxide in her father's hair tonic, bleaching his hair blonde]''
:'''Harry''': OK, my boy! Heir to the throne. Today, we diddle the customer.
:''[Michael drops his cookie, astonished]'' 
:'''Harry''': What's wrong with you? What are you looking at? Lovekins, where's my breakfast?
:'''Zinnia''': Here we are, my heartstrings. ''[sees her husband, shrieks, and throws two bowls of cereal in the air]'' Snickerdoodle, what did you do to your hair?
:'''Harry''': ''[confused]'' My hair?! ''[goes to a mirror as Zinnia and Michael watch, he sees his hair dyed blonde. He screams, and falls sideways to the floor. Stifling a laugh, Matilda takes a drink]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[FBI agents Bill and Bob are surveilling the Wormwood residence from across the street. Harry is outside, Matilda and Michael are holding car parts]''
:'''Harry''': Give me those things! Give me that! Where are you going with those? Give me those. Get in the car! ''[Harry grabs the car parts]'' Go on. ''[Michael and Matilda hop in the car]'' Get in.
:'''Narrator''': Dirty dealings, like buying stolen car parts, never stay secret for long. Especially when the FBI gets involved.
:''[FBI Agent Bill is reading a newspaper trying not to draw attention to him and Bob]''
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': ''[into recorder]'' 9:17, suspect exits domicile.
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': I've got 9:18.
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': ''[into recorder]'' 9:17 is correct.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Harry''': Michael, one day all this will be yours.
:'''Michael''': This?
:'''Harry''': See this junker? I paid a hundred dollars for her. She's got 120,000 miles on her. Transmission's shot, bumpers are falling off. What do I do with her, hmm? I sell her! ''[brushes Super Super Glue on the bumper]'' We really should weld these bumpers on, but that takes time, equipment, money. So we use 'Super Super Glue' instead. ''[to Michael and Matilda]'' Go ahead. Put it on there.
:'''Michael''': Won't it fall off?
:'''Harry''': Definitely.
:'''Matilda''': Isn't that dangerous?
:'''Harry''': Not to me. Okay? ''[pours sawdust into the transmission]'' Transmission… The sawdust quiets the gears and lets the motor run as sweet as a nut, for a couple a miles.
:'''Matilda''': Daddy, that's cheating.
:'''Harry''': Of course that's cheating. Nobody ever got rich being honest. ''[picks up a drill that's hooked up to the odometer]'' Twenty years ago, we could turn the numbers back by hand, but, here, take my hat! ''[gives Michael his hat, who puts it down]'' But the feds like to test the ingenuity of the American businessman. Two directional drill. You run it backwards, the numbers go down. Watch the speedometer.
:'''Michael''': Cool.
:'''Harry''': See?
:'''Michael''': Yeah.
:'''Matilda''': Daddy, you're a crook.
:'''Harry''': What?
:'''Matilda''': This is illegal.
:'''Harry''': Here. Keep drilling. ''[gives Michael the drill as he walks over to Matilda]'' You make money? Do you have a job?
:'''Matilda''': No. But don't people need good cars? Can't you sell good cars, dad?
:'''Harry''': Listen, you little wiseacre. I'm smart; you're dumb. I'm big; you're little. I'm right; you're wrong. And there's nothing you can do about it. ''[as Harry walks away, Matilda spots the hat and super glue and gets an idea]''
:'''Zinnia''': Harry! I won! I won! I hit the double bingo! Come on, everybody. I'm taking you all to Café Le Ritz.
:'''Harry''': Let me see the money.
:'''Zinnia''': Never mind.
:'''Harry''': Double bingo, huh? Ooh.
:'''Zinnia''': God, your hair looks awful. I hope they let you in.
:'''Harry''': They'll let me in.
:'''Matilda''': ''[gives Harry his hat]'' Here's your hat, daddy.
:'''Harry''': Get in the car. Go on, get in. How much?
:'''Zinnia''': It's for me to know, and you to find out.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Zinnia''': It's nice to go out sometimes, isn't it? 
:'''Harry''': Yeah.
:'''Zinnia''': You never take us out.
:'''Harry''': Of course, I do. I took you to &quot;The Flipper&quot;.
:'''Zinnia''': I don't remember any &quot;The Flipper&quot;.
:'''Harry''': The fish joint. You found that comb in the bouillabaisse.
:'''Zinnia''': Oh, yeah. I liked that joint.
:'''Waiter''': Bon jour. This way, please.
:'''Zinnia''': Harry, take your hat off.
:'''Harry''': I can't.
:'''Zinnia''': This is a nice place. You can't wear a hat inside.
:'''Harry''': I can't take it off.
:'''Zinnia''': Harry, nobody cares what your hair looks like.
:'''Harry''': I can't get it off.
:'''Zinnia''': ''[trying desperately to get the hat off]'' What's with this hat?
:'''Harry''': I can't get it off. I can't get it off.
:'''Zinnia''': Just a minute. I'm gonna get this hat off.
:'''Harry''': Pull it. Pull it.
:'''Zinnia''': I'm pulling it!
:'''Harry''': Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
:'''Zinnia''': I think your head swelled up really bad.
:'''Harry''': You're pulling the skin!
:'''Zinnia''': You! You're such a baby. Stop it!
:'''Harry''': Fibers are fused to the head!
:'''Zinnia''': Fibers are fused... What is that supposed to mean?! ''[she pulls at the hat one last time, flying backwards and tumbling head over heels over a table also sending Harry into a waiter which sends 3 menus into the air. He then falls into a dessert cart which sends some dessert flying as another waiter catches the menus. A fourth menu hits the tines of a fork which lands in a cream tart in front of Matilda. Mikey gets splattered with another cream dessert. Matilda happily takes a forkful of the cream tart]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Harry''': I will not be a figure of ridicule! I want respect and I want it now!
:'''Zinnia''': I still don't see how you glued your hat on, Harry. I mean, I ''know'' you say you didn't, but obviously you did.
:'''Harry''': I did ''not'' glue my hat to my head! The hat shrunk, the fibres fused to my hair!
:'''Zinnia''': Baby! Wait a minute. I'm getting it now. I'm getting it. One more. Oh, my God.
:'''Harry''': From now on, this family does exactly what I say, when exactly when I say it!
:'''Zinnia''': Here's your hat, Harry.
:'''Harry''': Give me that hat. And right now, we are eating dinner and watching TV.
:'''Mickey''': Are you ready to get sticky with Mickey?
:'''Crowd''': ''[cheering]''
:'''Harry''': Shut your light off.
:'''Mickey''': I'm just giving it away! For those idiots out there who don't know how to play, here's how it goes. For each correct answer, they'll move one step closer to our Cube of Cash. Once in our Cube of Cash, any money that sticks to your gooey body, you get to take home!
:'''Matilda''': Hi, Dad.
:'''Harry''': ''[very stern]'' Are you in this family? ''[Matilda does not answer]'' Hello? Are you in this family? ''[switches lamp off]'' Dinnertime is family time! What is this trash you're reading?
:'''Matilda''': It's not trash, Dad, it's lovely. It's called &quot;[[Moby Dick]]&quot; by Herman Melville.
:'''Harry''': ''[confused]'' Moby What?! ''[angrily grabs the book, and rips the pages]'' This is filth! Trash!
:'''Matilda''': It's not mine, it's a library book!
:'''Harry''': Trash! ''[throws the book on the floor]'' I'm fed up with all this reading! You're a Wormwood, and it's time you started acting like one! Sit up and look at the TV! ''[grabs Matilda's head, forcing her to watch TV]''
:'''Mickey''': The producers are not liable for any skin irritation that may result from playing our game. Get real sticky and get cash for free. All right, that's enough. Let's get sticky!
:''[Forcing Matilda to watch the TV by holding his hands on the side of her head, the TV suddenly explodes due to Matilda using her powers.]''
:'''Matilda''': I didn't do it.
:'''Harry''': Of course, you didn't do it, you little twit.
:'''Zinnia''': I told you that was a cheap set.
:'''Harry''': It's not a cheap set. It's a stolen set. Put your light on!
:'''Michael''': Bummer.
:'''Narrator''': Was it magic or coincidence? She didn't know. It is said that we humans use only a tiny portion of our brains. Matilda might never have discovered her own great strength of mind were it not for the events that began on the very next day.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Trunchbull''': I need a car that is inexpensive, but reliable. Can you service me?
:'''Harry''': As a matter of speaking, yes. Welcome to Wormwood Motors. Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, whatever.
:'''Trunchbull''': Agatha Trunchbull, principal, Crunchem Hall Elementary School. I warned you, sir. I want a tight car, because I'm on a tight ship.
:'''Harry''': Oh yeah, huh? Uh…
:'''Trunchbull''': My school is a model of discipline. &quot;Use the rod, beat the child&quot;. That's my motto.
:'''Harry''': Terrific motto.
:'''Trunchbull''': Do you have any brats for yourself?
:'''Harry''': Yeah, I got a boy, Mikey, and one mistake, Matilda.
:'''Trunchbull''': They're all mistakes, children. Filthy and nasty things. I'm glad I never was one.
:'''Harry''': Uh-huh. Well, since you're an educator, I'm gonna make you a great deal.
:'''Trunchbull''': You'd better.
:'''Harry''': Let's do business. Thank you. Enjoy it. ''[hands the Trunch the keys to the car]''
:'''Harry''': Hey, you. You're going to school.
:'''Matilda''': I am?
:'''Harry''': First thing tomorrow. ''[Matilda runs up to Harry and gives him a hug]'' Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. You'll get a real education at this place.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': Matilda had always wanted to go to school, because she loved to learn. She tried to imagine what her new school would be like.
:'''Harry''': Go ahead.
:'''Narrator''': She pictured a lovely building surrounded by trees, and flowers and swings. Well, there was a building… And children, so regardless of what Crunchem Hall looked like, she was happy to be there. After all, any school's better than no school at all, isn't it?
:'''Boy''': Hey, wait up!
:''[all shriek as Trunchbull approaches out the school doors and slowly walks down the stairs while suspenseful music plays]''
:'''Trunchbull''': You, detention. You're too small. Grow up quicker. Heads up. Shoulders back. Stomachs in. Stand up straight.
:'''Lavender''': Hey!
:'''Matilda''': Sorry.
:'''Trunchbull''': Detention for you.
:'''Lavender''': That's okay. It's much better than being out there.
:'''Matilda''': Is that my teacher?
:'''Trunchbull''': Too pink!
:'''Lavender''': No. That's the principal, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Matilda''': You've gotta be kidding.
:'''Lavender''': Uh-uh.
:''[another girl, Hortensia, appears]''
:'''Hortensia''': You squirts better skedaddle. I'm not kidding. The Trunchbull likes to snap a whip in there to see who's trying to hide.
:'''Trunchbull''': Stomach in! Change those socks! Too pink!
:'''Matilda''': I'm Matilda.
:'''Lavender''': Lavender. ''[she shakes hands with Matilda]''
:'''Hortensia''': I'm Hortensia.
:'''Both''': Hi.
:'''Matilda''': She doesn't really hit children with that riding crop, does she?
:'''Hortensia''': No. It's mostly for scare. What she does is worse. Like yesterday, in the second grade, the Trunchbull makes a weekly visit to every classroom, to show the teachers a thing or two about handling kids. And Julius Rottwinkle ate two M&amp;Ms during her lesson.
:''[A flashback of Julius shows him sneaking M&amp;Ms as the Trunch squeezes his cheeks to make him spit them out, the rest of the students gasp as the Trunch then picks him up and throws him out the window.]''
:'''Matilda''': And she caught him?
:'''Hortensia''': Of course.
:'''Julius''': Aaaaaahhhhhhh!
:'''Matilda''': Was Julius okay?
:'''Hortensia''': After being thrown out the window? Of course he wasn't okay. He lived, if that's what you mean.
:'''Lavender''': The Trunchbull used to be in the Olympics: Shot-put, javelin, hammer throw. The hammer throw was her specialty.
:'''Matilda''': So she does this all the time?
:'''Hortensia''': Better than being put in &quot;The Chokey&quot;.
:'''Matilda''': The Chokey?
:'''Hortensia''': Yeah, the Chokey. ''[the camera zooms in on the Chokey as Hortensia explains]'' It's a tall, narrow hole in a wall behind a door. You have to stand in a drippy pipe with jagged edges, and the walls have broken glass with nails sticking out.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[locks a girl in the Chokey]'' Get inside, you festering ball of pus!
:'''Matilda''': She puts kids in there?
:'''Hortensia''': I've been in there twice. Sometimes she leaves you in there all day.
:''[screen fades to white, then to Matilda]''
:'''Matilda''': Didn't you tell your parents?
:'''Hortensia''': They didn't believe me. I mean, would your parents believe it?
:''[Matilda thinks about this for a minute as the screen pans to Miss Trunchbull]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Sixty lines after school: &quot;I must obey Miss Trunchbull.&quot;
:''[screen pans to Matilda]''
:'''Matilda''': No.
:'''Trunchbull''': Out of my way!
:'''Matilda''': Here she comes.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[notices Matilda]'' Ah. Mmm... Fresh meat!
:'''Amanda''': ''[crying]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Amanda Thripp.
:'''Amanda''': Yes, Miss Trunchbull?
:'''Trunchbull''': What are those? ''[referring to her pigtails]''
:'''Amanda''': ''[in between tears]'' What's what, Miss Trunchbull?
:'''Trunchbull''': Hanging down by your ears.
:'''Amanda''': ''[in between tears]'' You mean my pigtails?
:'''Trunchbull''': Are you a pig, Amanda?
:'''Amanda''': ''[in between tears]'' No, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Trunchbull''': Do I allow pigs in my school?
:'''Amanda''': My mommy thinks they're sweet.
:'''Trunchbull''': Your mommy... is a twit! You are chop those off before school tomorrow or I will...
:'''Amanda''': But, I don't...
:'''Trunchbull''': Come on! But! &quot;But&quot;? Did you say &quot;but&quot;?
:'''Hortensia''': ''[whispering]'' Hammer throw.
:'''Matilda''': ''[whispering]'' What?
:'''Lavender''': Definitely.
:'''Trunchbull''': I'll give you &quot;but&quot;!
:''[she picks Amanda up and swings her around by her pigtails]''
:'''Girl''': Good loft.
:'''Boy''': Excellent release.
:'''Hortensia''': Think she'll make the fence?
:'''Boy''': Gonna be a close one.
:''[Amanda makes the fence lands in some flowers which she scoops up]''
:'''All''': ''[cheering]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Quiet! Get to class before I throw you all in the Chokey.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Matilda''': Lavender, what's my teacher like?
:'''Trunchbull''': Run, run, run! Faster. Get in. Quickly!
:'''Narrator''': But Matilda's teacher, Miss Honey, was one of those remarkable people who appreciates every single child for who he or she is.
:''[the scene cuts to Ms. Honey's classroom]''
:'''Amanda''': I scooped these up for ''you'', Miss Honey.
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, how lovely. Thank you, Amanda. Okay, listen up, everybody. Have a new student with us today. This is Matilda Wormwood. I'd like ''you'' to sit here with Lavender. All right, could ''you'' get her workbook for her, please?
:'''Lavender''': Yes, Miss Honey.
:'''Narrator''': Miss Honey was a wonderful teacher, and a friend to everyone. But her life was not as simple and beautiful as it seemed. Miss Honey had a deep, dark secret. And though it caused her great pain, she didn't let it interfere with her teaching.
:'''Miss Honey''': Well, Matilda. You've come on a very good day, because we're going to review everything we've learned so far. Now, it's all right if you don't know or understand any of this, because you're brand new, but if you do know an answer, just raise your hand. Okay, now we've been working on our two-times tables. Would anyone like to demonstrate? ''[all raise their hands]'' Okay. Let's do some together. Two times four is?
:'''Kids''': 8.
:'''Miss Honey''': Two times six is?
:'''Kids''': 12.
:'''Miss Honey''': Two times nine is?
:'''Kids''': 18.
:'''Miss Honey''': Excellent. You've been practicing. Pretty soon you'll be able to do any multiplication, whether it's two times 7?
:'''Kids''': 14.
:'''Miss Honey''': Very good. Or 13 times 379.
:'''Matilda''': Four thousand, nine hundred, and twenty-seven.
:'''Miss Honey''': I beg your pardon?
:'''Matilda''': I think that's the answer. 13 times 379. Four nine two seven.
:''[Miss Honey sits down and checks Matilda’s math.]''
:'''Miss Honey''': It is.
:'''Lavender''': Wow!
:'''Miss Honey''': Matilda, you know how to multiply big numbers?
:'''Matilda''': I read this book last year in mathematics at the library.
:'''Miss Honey''': You like to read?
:'''Matilda''': Oh, yes. I love to read.
:'''Miss Honey''': What do you like to read?
:'''Matilda''': Everything. But lately I've been reading Darles Chickens. ''[Corrects herself]'' I mean, Charles Dickens. I could read him every day.
:'''Miss Honey''': So could I. All right, everyone. Take out your workbooks. Let's start with section three. I'll be back in a moment.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[throws a handful of darts at pictures on the dartboard on the back of her door]'' Yippee! Gotcha right in the neck! And you... ''[Jenny knocks on the door]'' Come in, come in, whoever you are. Almost got you. Good to see ya, Jen. Good. Good. Good. Time for one of our little heart-to-hearts?
:'''Miss Honey''': Actually, it's about the new girl in my class, Miss Trunchbull. Matilda Wormwood.
:'''Trunchbull''': Her father says she's a real wart. ''[As she pours a glass of water]'' A carbuncle. A blister. A festering pustule of malignant ooze.
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, no. Matilda Wormwood is a very sweet girl, and very bright.
:'''Trunchbull''': A bright child?
:'''Miss Honey''': Yes. She can multiply large sums in her head.
:'''Trunchbull''': So can a calculator.
:'''Miss Honey''': Well, I think she might be happier in an older, and more advanced class.
:'''Trunchbull''': Ahh! I knew it. You can't handle the little viper, so you're trying to foist her off onto one of the other teachers.
:'''Miss Honey''': No, no,no, Miss Truncubull.
:'''Trunchbull''': Yes! Typical! Slothful! Cowardice! Listen to me, Jen. ''[picks up a shot-put ball and throws it at the door]'' The distance the shot-put goes depends upon the effort you put into it. Perspiration! If you can't handle the little brat, I'll lock her up in the chokey!
:'''Trunchbull''': Get it?
:'''Miss Honey''': Yes, Ma'am.
:'''Trunchbull''': One day, Jen, you'll see that everything I do is for your own good and the good of those putrescent little children!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Zinnia''': ''[on the phone]'' Get back at Tiffany, when she was having that baby.
:'''Matilda''': Mom. I'm home.
:'''Zinnia''': Hi. How was school?
:'''Matilda''': School was great. My teacher lets me do sixth grade work. Look. Algebra and geography,
:'''Zinnia''': ''[back on phone]'' The thing with Valerie's brother. You're kidding? Hold on a minute. Can't you see I'm in the middle of an important phone call?
:'''Matilda''': Well, you just asked me how school was.
:'''Zinnia''': Quiet! …Well, what else was she supposed to do? The baby wasn't his.
:'''Matilda''': Well, it was really great.
:'''Zinnia''': No way. They've gotta be implants.
:'''Matilda''': The principal is insane. She threw a girl over the fence by her hair.
:'''Zinnia''': It would change your life, too, if you waxed yours. I'm positive.
:'''Matilda''': I have the most wonderful teacher.
:'''Zinnia''': Mine are driving me crazy. I'm telling you. Six hours a day at school is not enough.
:'''Matilda''': I'll say.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Nighttime, Zinnia watches a wrestling match on TV. Harry imitates to wrestle with Michael. Sitting in the arm-chair, Matilda does her homework]''
:'''Harry''': Whack to the belly! A smack in the face. Another smack in the face! Burns is hurt! He's on the rope, ladies and gentlemen! ''[a doorbell is heard]'' Saved by the bell! ''[suddenly confused]'' The packages are at this hour?
:'''Zinnia''': Come here. ''[straightens her husband's hair with a hairbrush]'' Okay.
:''[Harry answers the door to Jenny]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Hello.
:'''Harry''': We don't give money, we don't like charities, and we don't buy raffle tickets. ''[goes to rudely shut the door in Jenny's face]''
:'''Miss Honey''': ''[stops him]'' Mr. Wormwood, I'm Jennifer Honey, and I'm Matilda's teacher.
:''[Matilda looks up from doing her homework]''
:'''Harry''': What has she done now? ''[to Matilda]'' You! Go to your room, right now! Right now! Beat it! ''[Matilda walks off; back to Jenny]'' Look, whatever it is, she's ''your'' problem now.
:'''Miss Honey''': ''[stopping Harry from closing the door again]'' No. There's no problem.
:'''Harry''': Then beat it. We're watching TV.
:'''Miss Honey''': ''[stops Harry from closing the door once more, and glares at him]'' Mr. Wormwood, if you think watching some rotten TV show is more important than your daughter, then maybe you shouldn't be a parent. Now, why don't you turn that darn thing off and listen to me?
:'''Harry''': ''[sighs in frustration and in defeat]'' All right. Come on in. Let's get this over with. Mrs. Wormwood is not gonna like this. Come on, get it. ''[Jenny finally enters the house]'' Close the door.
:''[Jenny obeys]''
:'''Zinnia''': Who is it?
:'''Harry''': Some teacher. Says she's gotta talk to you about Matilda.
:''[Harry shuts the TV off]''
:'''Zinnia''': What did you do that for? He had Velasquez on the ropes.
:'''Harry''': What do you want?
:'''Miss Honey''': I'm sure you're aware by now that Matilda has a brilliant mind.
:'''Harry''': Yeah. Right! Mikey, give me a beer.
:''[Michael throws Harry a beer]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Her math skills are simply extraordinary. She's reading material…
:'''Michael''': Want one?
:'''Miss Honey''': No thank you, dear. Material that I didn't see until my second year of college.
:'''Zinnia''': ''[mocking]'' Oh, college.
:'''Harry''': Great. College.
:'''Miss Honey''': I really feel with private instruction that she'd be ready for college in just a few, short years.
:'''Zinnia''': Look, Miss Snit, a girl does not get anywhere by acting intelligent. I mean, take a look at you and me. You chose books. I chose looks. I have a nice house, a wonderful husband.… And you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs. You want Matilda to go to college? Ha, ha, ha ha...
:'''Harry''': College? I didn't go to college. I don't know anybody who did. Buncha hippies and cesspool salesmen, ha ha ha ha...
:'''Miss Honey''': Don't sneer at educated people, Mr. Wormwood. If you became ill, heaven forbid, your doctor would be a college graduate.
:'''Harry''': ''[scoffs]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Or say you were sued for selling a faulty car. The lawyer who defended you would have gone to college too.
:''[Matilda is eavesdropping with a scared look on her face knowing she was the one who’s told Miss Honey about her dad’s shady business practices]''
:'''Harry''': What car? Sued by who? Who you been talking to?
:'''Miss Honey''': Nobody. …Oh, dear. I can see we're not going to agree, are we? No. …I'm sorry I burst in on you like this. Sorry.
:'''Zinnia''': We oughta sue her for interrupting our show.
:'''Harry''': Tell me about it! Why's he standing in the middle of the ring? ''[The fight is now over, Miss Honey leaves a copy of The Wind in the Willows by the front door]''
:'''Matilda''': ''[whispering]'' Thank you.
:'''Miss Honey''': ''[whispering]'' Tomorrow.
:'''Zinnia''': He's standing in the middle of the ring 'cause it's over.
:'''Harry''': We missed it?
:'''Zinnia''': Great. It's over.
:'''Harry''': Who won?
:'''Zinnia''': How do I know? You shut it off!
:'''Harry''': Was it my fault she came in the middle of the fight?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Trunchbull''': Hop to! Hippity hop! The entire school will go to the assembly room immediately. ''SIT!'' ''[kids sit down]''
:'''Matilda''': What's up?
:'''Lavender''': Beats me.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[hits rod against left hand twice]'' Bruce Bogtrotter. ''[students gasp as screen zooms to Bruce]'' Would little Brucey come up here, please?
:'''Lavender''': Uh-oh. He lives on my block.
:'''Trunchbull''': This boy, Bruce Bogtrotter, is none other than a vicious sneak thief. You're a disgusting criminal, aren't you?
:'''Bruce''': I don't know what you're talking about.
:'''Trunchbull''': Cake. Chocolate cake. You slithered like a serpent into the school kitchen and ate my personal snack! ''[its rod at Bruce]'' Do you deny it? Confess.
:'''Bruce''': Well, it's hard for me to remember a specific cake.
:'''Trunchbull''': This one was mine, and it was the most scrumptious cake in the entire world.
:'''Bruce''': My mom's is better.
:'''Trunchbull''': It is, is it? How can you be sure unless you have another piece? Sit down, Bog. ''[taunting him with the piece of cake]'' Here we go. Smells chocolatey, eh? Now, eat it.
:'''Bruce''': I don't want any, thank you.
:'''Trunchbull''': '''''EAT IT!'''''
:'''Lavender''': ''[whispers]'' Don't eat it.
:'''Boy''': She wouldn't give him cake.
:'''Girl''': It's poison.
:'''Boy''': Something's up.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[Bruce has eaten the piece of cake she gave him]'' You look like you enjoyed that, Brucey.
:'''Bruce''': Yes, ma'am.
:'''Trunchbull''': You must have some more.
:'''Bruce''': No, thanks.
:'''Trunchbull''': But you'll hurt cook's feelings. Cookie. ''[Cookie uncovers the whole cake, from which a slice had been cut]'' She made this cake just for you to have on your very own. Her sweat and blood went into this cake. And you will not leave this platform until you have consumed the entire confection!
:'''Cookie''': Entire confection. See ya at lunch.
:'''Trunchbull''': Thank you, Cookie.
:'''Cookie''': Rotten kids. ''[walks away]''
:'''Trunchbull''': You wanted cake, you got cake. Now eat it!
:''[The children gasp]''
:'''Lavender''': Poor Brucey. He's going to puke. I can't look. Is he going to puke?
:'''Matilda''': Without a doubt.
:'''Hortensia''': Bruce looks real bad.
:'''Trunchbull''': Give up?
:'''Matilda''': ''[stands up and encourages Bruce to finish the cake]'' You can do it, Brucey!
:''[the other kids join in]''
:'''Hortensia''': Yeah, you can do it!
:'''Boy''': Go, Bruce!
:'''Students''': Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! Bruce! ''[excited clamoring]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Silence!
:'''Bruce''': Yes! Yes! '''''Yeah!!!'''''
:'''Trunchbull''': Silence! Stop! Silence! Stop!
:'''Bruce''': '''''YEEEEEAH! YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!'''''
:''[Agatha puts her arms out, then breaks the plate on Bruce's head, making him burp and the kids laugh]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Shut up! The entire assembly will stay five hours after school and copy from the dictionary! Any children who object will go straight into the chokey together!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Harry''': Young lady, where were you?!
:'''Matilda''': Miss Trunchbull kept the whole school late because this boy ate some chocolate cake.
:'''Harry''': That's the biggest lie I ever heard. You see those packages over there? They were left out for the whole world to see because you weren't here to take 'em in!
:'''Zinnia''': I don't think it's fair, bumpkins.
:'''Harry''': What?
:'''Zinnia''': You get all this stuff from catalogues, and I don't get anything!
:'''Harry''': It's not catalogues, it's car parts, sweetness. It's business!
:'''Zinnia''': Oh, if it's business, why don't you have it sent to the office?
:'''Harry''': Because the cops may be watching the office.
:'''Matilda''': The cops are watching the house.
:'''Harry''': What?
:'''Matilda''': They're parked outside right now.
:'''Zinnia''': You are such an ignoramus! Those are speedboat salesmen! Really nice guys.
:'''Harry''': ''[looks outside]'' Speedboats? There are no lakes around here.
:'''Zinnia''': Yeah, but some people like to go away on the weekends. Some people have fun!
:'''Matilda''': And some people are cops.
:'''Harry''': They are not cops!
:'''Matilda''': Are too!
:'''Harry''': They are not! I oughta know if there's cops watching my house! Now get to bed, you lying little earwig.

&lt;hr width=50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': With the FBI watching her father and the Trunchbull terrorizing her school, it was a rare and happy moment when Matilda could just play with her friends.
:''[Lavender catches something while the children are hanging out at a creek]''
:'''Lavender''': A frog, a frog, a frog!
:'''Matilda''': What is it, Lavender?
:'''Lavender''': A frog!
:''[Later, they take a closer look at Lavender's catch]''
:'''Lavender''': It's a salamander.
:'''Hortensia''': It's a chameleon.
:'''Matilda''': It's a newt. ''[reading from a book]'' &quot;Any of the small semi-aquatic salamanders from the genus Triturus&quot;.
:'''Bruce''': ''[also reading]'' &quot;Some are brightly colored and secrete irritating substances.&quot;
:'''Trunchbull''': How could you keep going, you useless, flaming CAR?! '''Wormwood!''' ''[screen pans to Lavender getting inside and Matilda opening her mouth surprised, looking at Trunchbull]'' Sell me a lemon?! You're heading for the chokey, young lady!
:'''Matilda''': Chokey?
:'''Trunchbull''': Teach you a lesson!
:'''Matilda''': What lesson?
:'''Trunchbull''': You and your father think you can make a fool out of me!
:'''Matilda''': My father?
:'''Trunchbull''': The guy with the stupid haircut!
:'''Matilda''': I'm nothing like my father.
:'''Trunchbull''': You're the spitting image. The apple never rots far from the tree!
:''[Trunchbull Matilda in the Chokey, makes her stay in there after school for an hour, and locks her inside.]''
:''[while Matilda is kicking and screaming in the Chokey wanting to be free the scene cuts from the Chokey to Matilda's classroom]''
:'''Lavender''': Miss Honey!!!!!
:'''Miss Honey''': Miss Trunchbull teaches our class today, Lavender. Please get a water pitcher.
:'''Lavender''': But, Miss Honey!!!!
:'''Miss Honey''': Shh! No, quickly. She'll be here any second. Come on. Oh, make sure the water's cold, Lavender. ''[Lavender pours the glass with the newt into the pitcher]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Vinny, cover the fish. Put away the art projects. Put away anything colorful. Oh Charley, won't you get those crayons for me?
:'''Narrator''': Most great ideas come from hard work and careful planning. Of course, once in a while, they just jump out at you.
:'''Miss Honey''': Rayna. Rayna. Cover the birds and the beetles. Hurry! Hurry! I hear her coming! Okay now. Last time, some of you forgot yourselves. Don't speak unless you're spoken to. Don't laugh. Don't smile. Don't even breathe loudly.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[hits her rod against her hand while Lavender is holding a water glass and jug]'' Don't breathe at all.
:'''Miss Honey''': Good morning, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Students''': Good morning, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Trunchbull''': '''''SIT!!!!''''' ''[hits rod against her hand again]'' Shoo. I have never been able to understand why small children are so disgusting. They're the bane of my life. They're like insects.
:''[Lavender sticks out her tongue]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Where's Matilda?
:'''Trunchbull''': They should be got rid of as early as possible. Fsht! My idea of a perfect school is one in which there are no children... at all. ''[laughs]''
:''[Miss Honey looks and sees that Matilda isn’t there. She mouths to Lavender to ask where Matilda is. Lavender puts her hands to her throat to signal that she's in the Chokey]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Do you agree, Miss Honey?
:''[Miss Honey nods yes as she leaves the room to free Matilda.]''
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[turns back to the boy]'' Now. You, front of the class!
:''[Screen pans to Miss Honey opening the door to the Chokey]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Are you okay?
:''[Miss Honey rescues Matilda and hugs her]''
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[while grabbing a boy by the legs]'' Next time I tell you to empty your pockets, you'll do it faster, won't you?!
:'''Boy''': Yes, Miss Trunchbull!
:'''Trunchbull''': Miss Honey, this might be the most interesting thing you've ever done! ''[Miss Trunchbull drops the boy]'' Sit down, you squirming worm of vomit!
:'''Boy''': Thank you, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Trunchbull''': Get up!! Can you spell?
:'''Amanda''': Miss Honey taught us how to spell a long word yesterday. We can spell &quot;difficulty&quot;.
:'''Trunchbull''': You couldn't spell 'difficulty' if your life depended on it.
:'''Amanda''': She taught us with a poem.
:'''Trunchbull''': A poem. How sweet. What poem would that be?
:'''Students''': Mrs. D. Mrs. I. Mrs. F - F - I. Mrs. C. Mrs. U. Mrs. L - T - Y.
:'''Trunchbull''': Why are all these women married?! Mrs. D? Mrs. I? You're supposed to be teaching spelling, not poetry! I cannot for the life of me understand why small children take so long to grow up. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me. What's funny? Come on. Spit it out. Speak up. I like a joke as well as the next fat person.
:''[She looks down and sees the newt. The children laugh]''
:'''Trunchbull''': It's a snake! It's a snake! It's a snake! One of you tried to poison me! Who? Oh, Matilda. I knew it.
:'''Matilda''': I just thought you'd like to know, it's not a snake. It's a newt.
:'''Trunchbull''': What did you say?
:'''Matilda''': It's a newt, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Trunchbull''': Stand up, you villainous sack of goat slime! You did this!
:'''Matilda''': No, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Trunchbull''': Did you act alone, or did you have accomplices?
:'''Matilda''': I didn't do it.
:'''Trunchbull''': You didn't like the chokey, did you? Thought you'd pay me back, didn't you? Well, I'll pay you back, young lady.
:'''Matilda''': For what, Miss Trunchbull?
:'''Trunchbull''': For this newt, you pissworm!
:'''Matilda''': I'm telling you, I didn't do it!
:'''Trunchbull''': Besides, even if you didn't do it, I'm going to punish you, because I'm big and you're small, and I'm right, and you're wrong. And there's nothing you can do about it. You're a liar and a scoundrel, and your father's a liar and a cheat! You're the most corrupt low-lifes in the history of civilization. Am I wrong? I'm never wrong. In this classroom, in this school, I am God!
:''[Splash! The glass tips over and the newt lands on Trunchbull, she panics trying to shake it off, everyone in the class laughs]''
:'''Trunchbull''': You!
:'''Matilda''': I didn't move!
:'''Trunchbull''': You did this!
:'''Miss Honey''': How could she possibly have done it when she was sitting way over here?
:'''Trunchbull''': I'll be watching you. Each and every one of you. When you turn the corner. When you go to your little cubbies to get your smelly little coats. When you skip merrily to lunch. I'll be watching you. All of you, and especially you!
:'''Lavender''': Thanks for not telling.
:'''Matilda''': Best friends don't tell. She can really dance.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Miss Honey''': You all go outside, then I'll come out and help fill the birdfeeder. Okay? I'll be out there in a minute.
:'''Matilda''': Miss Honey, I did it.
:'''Miss Honey''': Did what?
:'''Matilda''': I made the glass tip over.
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, sweetheart. Don't let Miss Trunchbull make you feel that way. Nobody did it. It was an accident.
:'''Matilda''': I did it with my eyes. Watch. I'll prove it to you.
:'''Miss Honey''': It's wonderful you feel so powerful. Many people don't feel powerful at all.
:'''Matilda''': Come on, glass. Tip over!
:'''Miss Honey''': It's all right, Matilda.
:'''Matilda''': I really did it, Miss Honey.
:'''Miss Honey''': One of the odd things about life is sometimes you can do something until you want to show someone, and then you can't. Or, sometimes when you think something's broken, and you take it to be fixed…
:'''Matilda''': This isn't like that. I don't know. Maybe I made myself tired.
:'''Miss Honey''': Matilda, would you like to come over to my house this afternoon?
:'''Matilda''': I'd like that very much, Miss Honey.
:'''Miss Honey''': Good.
:'''Matilda''': I just stare very hard, and then my eyes get all hot, and I can feel the strongness. I feel like I can move almost anything in the world. You do believe me, don't you?
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, I believe that you should believe in whatever power you think you have inside of you. Believe it with all your heart. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Matilda and Jenny walk past Trunchbull's house]''
:'''Miss Honey''': That's where Ms. Trunchbull lives.
:'''Matilda''': Why is there a swing?
:'''Miss Honey''': A girl I know used to live in that house. ''[cut to a series of flashbacks]'' Her life was good and happy. When she was just 2 years old, her mother died. Her father was a doctor, and he needed someone to look after things at home. So he invited the mother's stepsister to come and live with him. But the girl's aunt was a mean person, who treated the girl very badly.
:'''Matilda''': The Trunchbull.
:'''Miss Honey''': Yes. And worst of all, when the girl was 5, her father died.
:'''Matilda''': How did her father die?
:'''Miss Honey''': The police decided he killed himself.
:'''Matilda''': Why would he do such a thing?
:'''Miss Honey''': No one knows. ''[cut back to present]'' The end is happier. She found a small cottage. She rented it from this lovely rhubarb farmer for just $50 a month, and she covered it in honeysuckle, and she planted hundreds of wildflowers, and she moved out of her wicked aunt's house, and she finally got her freedom.
:'''Matilda''': Good for her.
:'''Miss Honey''': Do you know why I told you this?
:'''Matilda''': No.
:'''Miss Honey''': You were born into a family that doesn't always appreciate you, but one day things are going to be very different. Shall we go inside and have tea and cookies?
:''[Matilda and Jenny arrive at the cottage]''
:'''Matilda''': Yes, please. This is the cottage from your story.
:'''Miss Honey''': Yes.
:'''Matilda''': The young woman is you.
:'''Miss Honey''': Yes.
:'''Matilda''': But then... ''[her eyes widen in realization]'' No.
:'''Miss Honey''': Yes. ''Aunt'' Trunchbull. When I left my home Aunt Trunchbull's home, I had to leave all my treasures behind.
:'''Matilda''': Treasures?
:'''Miss Honey''': Photographs of my mother and father, and a beautiful doll my mother gave me with a China face. Liccy doll, I called her. Would you like some milk?
:'''Matilda''': Yes, please. Why don't you run away?
:'''Miss Honey''': I've often thought about it, but... I can't abandon my children. And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all.
:'''Matilda''': You're very brave, Miss Honey.
:'''Miss Honey''': Not as brave as you.
:'''Matilda''': I thought grown-ups weren't afraid of anything.
:'''Miss Honey''': Quite the contrary. All grown-ups get scared, just like children.
:'''Matilda''': I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Matilda''': There she is! Shot put.
:'''Miss Honey''': Hammerthrow.
:'''Both''': Javelin.
:'''Cat''': Meow, meow.
:'''Trunchbull''': Woof!
:'''Cat''': Meow, meow, meow.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[while shaking keyring]'' Back, back, back. Back! Back from me.
:'''Matilda''': She's afraid of a cat?
:'''Miss Honey''': Black cats. She's very superstitious.
:'''Trunchbull''': Go! Rrr rrr rrr rrr! Grrrrr! Meow! ''[Trunchbull kicks the cat, and it scampers away]''
:'''Cat''': Meow! Meow!!!!
:'''Matilda''': Poor kitty!l.
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, he's all right.
:'''Matilda''': Hopefully. ''[Trunchbull drives the car]'' Let's go get your treasures.
:'''Miss Honey''': No, Matilda.
:'''Matilda''': Well, she's gone. Come on!
:'''Miss Honey''': Matilda!
:'''Matilda''': Miss Honey!
:'''Trunchbull''': Come on. Move, you piece of junkyard fodder. Uh, shift, you-- No, no. Oof, ooh, ah!
:'''Miss Honey''': Woah. My house… Oh my! My father's portrait used to hang there.
:'''Matilda''': Whoever painted the Trunchbull must have had a strong stomach. A really strong stomach!
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[yelling at she turns the car backwards]'' Back! Ooh, ooh, back! Back! Yeah! ''[starts pulling the car]''
:'''Miss Honey''': We should go. ''[spots the chocolate box]'' My father's chocolate box. After supper, he'd take a chocolate, cut it in half, and he'd always give me the bigger half. When he died, Aunt Trunchbull would count them, so I couldn't even sneak one. She'd take a chocolate, raise it to her lips, and say…
:'''Trunchbull''': Much too good for children.
:'''Matilda''': Have one.
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, no. She'd notice.
:'''Matilda''': Where's Liccy doll?
:'''Miss Honey''': Upstairs. Matilda! Matilda.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Trunchbull is seen dragging her car to her house]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Uh, you! Uh... Uh! You! Uh... Crush the little weevil!
:'''Miss Honey''': This is my room. That's my dad.
:'''Matilda''': What's his name?
:'''Miss Honey''': Magnus. I used to call him &quot;King Magnus&quot;, and he called me &quot;Bumblebee&quot;.
:'''Matilda''': I don't think Magnus killed himself.
:'''Miss Honey''': Neither do I.
:'''Matilda''': Is that Liccy doll?
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[on phone]'' '''''WORMWOOD!!!!!!''''' ''[Matilda and Miss Honey gasp]'' You useless used-car salesman scum! I want you around here now with another car! Yes. I know what 'caveat emptor' means, you low-life liar! I'm gonna sue you, I'm gonna burn down your showroom, and I'm gonna take that no-good jalopy and '''''SHOVE IT UP YOUR BAZOOKA!''''' When I'm finished with you, you're gonna look like roadkill! You what…? Haha! You...
:''[Screen pans to the box of chocolates, Trunchbull puts the lid back on then slides the lid under her nose to sniff it]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Come on.
:'''Matilda''': Shouldn't we hide or something?
:'''Miss Honey''': Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go, go to the end of that hallway, down the stairs, and out the kitchen door. I'll distract her.
:'''Trunchbull''': Who's in my house?! Hmph! Come on, fight like a man!
:'''Miss Honey''': ''[gasps as she peeks out]'' ''[Matilda hears a rattling noise coming down the stairs leading into the kitchen and becomes nervous that the Trunch has caught her, Miss Honey comes down the stairs and Matilda breathes a sigh of relief]'' Come on, come on. ''[they run into the basement and look for a way out, they try for the cellar doors, but the doors are locked with a chain and padlock]'' Come on, over there.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[in the basement wielding her shot put, looking for Miss Honey and Matilda]'' Some rats are gonna die today. Huh? ''[hears a small window closing, runs to the cellar door and pulls the chain and padlock off, she then emerges from the basement swinging the shot put as Matilda ducks trying not to be seen, She swings the shot put at a statue and looks around, then turns around and screams in anger as she heads back into the house]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, my goodness.
:'''Matilda''': Feel my heart. Weren't you the most scared you've ever been in your whole life?
:'''Miss Honey''': Come on. Let's go.
:'''Matilda''': She shouldn't be allowed to treat people like that. Somebody's got to teach her a lesson. We'll wait until she leaves again, then we'll go get your doll. 
:'''Miss Honey''': What? ''[looks at Matilda]''
:'''Matilda''': Just kidding.
:'''Miss Honey''': Come here. Matilda, promise me you will never go back in that house again.
:'''Matilda''': I promise.
:'''Miss Honey''': Okay. Come on.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Zinnia is talking to Bill and Bob]''
:'''Zinnia''': So, he came home with 2,000 dollars cash, and he threw it up in the air, and we both swam in it like we were both on the &quot;Million Dollar Sticky&quot;. Do you like that show?
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': I love that show.
:'''Zinnia''': That was the old days. Now we've got money in banks all over this planet, and does he give me a dime?
:''[Zinnia has been entertaining the FBI agents]''
:'''Zinnia''': Matilda, this is Bob and Bill.
:'''Matilda''': They're cops.
:'''Zinnia''': They're not cops, they're Ace powerboat salesmen.
:'''Harry''': ''[entering]'' Baby-cakes, I'm starved.
:'''Zinnia''': Hi, Harry.
:'''Harry''': ''[sees the agents and looks appalled]'' Who are you? What is this, a hot tub party? Get the hell out of here! I slave all day, I come home, you're entertaining a couple of surfer dude bodybuilders!
:'''Matilda''': They're cops, dad.
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': You interested in timeshare?
:'''Harry''': Get out of here.
:''[Harry slams the door on him]''
:'''Zinnia''': You don't let me talk to people! I live in a cage, Harry! I need to talk to ''somebody'' besides those stupid kids!
:'''Harry''': Oh, yeah?! '''''Well, a man is entitled to come home and find dinner on the [[w:table|table]], without having to wade through a convention of male strippers!'''''
:'''Matilda''': Dad!
:'''Harry''': What do ''you'' want?
:'''Matilda''': Yell at me, okay?
:'''Harry''': '''''Shut up and leave us alone!'''''
:'''Matilda''': '''Yell at me again!'''
:'''Harry''': '''''Yell at you? I'll come in there and pound your miserable hide! What do I have to do to gain respect around here?! I'm gonna give you a tanning like you've never had in your life! My word is my law! You understand?! Law!''''' ''[Matilda magically closes the door]''
:'''Narrator''': No kid likes being yelled at, but it was precisely Harry's ranting and raving that gave Matilda the key to her power. To unlock that power, all she had to do was practice.
:''[A series of flashbacks are shown.]''
:'''Harry''': You're a little cheat. (…You're a Wormwood. It's time you started acting like one! …) What are you, stupid?!? I'm smart, you're dumb. I'm big, you're little.
:'''Trunchbull''': The apple never rots far from the tree.
:'''Zinnia''': I think there's something wrong with that girl.
:'''Harry''': I'm right, you're wrong. And there's nothing you can do about it.
:'''Michael''': Hey, dip face, here's your book. ''[Throws book at Matilda]''
:'''Harry''': You're a Wormwood! It's time you started acting like one! (Time you started acting like one!)

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[As the background song &quot;[[w:Little Bitty Pretty One|Little Bitty Pretty One]]&quot; by [[w:Thurston Harris|Thurston Harris]] plays]''
:'''Man on the Radio''': That was my personal favorite played especially for all you little bitty pretty ones moving and grooving on this sunny afternoon. Playing music to make you smile, so you'd better not touch that!
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': ''[in the garage searching for the stolen car parts]'' Shouldn't we have a search warrant to do this?
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': Nah! This guy's dirty. Once we show this tape in court, Wormwood's goose is cooked. I'm sure that box is full of stolen car parts. ''[Matilda is using her powers to move the box as Bob moves the ladder to try and get the box]''
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': You've been taping all week. How about letting me handle that camera for awhile?
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': Do you know how to use it? Do you know about the zoom and the white balance? Do you know how to adjust the eyepiece?
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': I can handle it. Besides, it's my turn.
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': Yeah. Your turn to drop it.
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': I won't drop it. Come on.
:'''Matilda''': You two men are going to be in a lot of trouble very soon.
:'''FBI Agent Bill''': It's the female minor.
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': Aren't you supposed to be in school, young lady?
:'''Matilda''': I really hope you have a search warrant. According to a constitutional law book I read in the library, if you don't have one, you could lose your job or go to federal prison.
:'''FBI Agent Bob''': It's your father who's going to federal prison. And you know where you'll end up? In a federal orphanage. If you cooperate, we'll make sure it's a nice orphanage, the kind with food, teeny-weeny cockroaches. What do you say? ''[car starts rolling down the hill]''
:'''Matilda''': There's another crime in the making. Your car is about to run a stop sign. ''[She uses her powers to make the car roll down the hill. The agents run after the car as she removes the tape from the camera and throws it in the kitchen garbage]''
:'''Narrator''': So she bought a little time for her dad to come to his senses. But now, Matilda had bigger fish to fry, much bigger.
:''[light switch off at once]''
:'''Harry and Zinnia''': ''[laughing]''
:'''Michael''': Hey, dip-face, where you are going?
:'''Matilda''': Out.
:'''Michael''': Hey, dip-face, have a [[w:carrot|carrot]].
:''[Mikey shoots a carrot with his spoon towards his sister. Michael gasps, Matilda uses her powers to make the carrot shoot back at her brother who chokes on it]''
:'''Harry''': Chew your food! You're an animal!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': Having power isn't nearly as important as what you choose to do with it. And what Matilda had in mind was nothing short of heroic.
:'''Matilda''': ''[sitting on top of the Trunch’s garage roof using her powers to get the doll and 2 chocolates from the box]'' Come on! Come on, Liccy doll. Come, Liccy. Come on! Come on! Come on! Please come here. ''[She then uses her powers to torture the Trunch]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Leave me alone!
:''[She notices the levitating Olympic picture frame and the picture frame goes inside the fireplace which causes her to scream. Then she hears shot put balls falling down the stairs then she sees all the shot put balls bouncing down the stairs. She goes back to the living room.]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Magnus! ''[She notices the Magnus picture frame that is levitating down from the second floor and replaced it itself where the Olympics picture frame was hanged before. She stares at the picture frame which causes her to surprise then the clock starts to chime.]''
:''[Gets in her car to leave when she spots a red hair ribbon that gets caught around the door lock and sniffs it. She smiles evilly]''
:'''Matilda''': Miss Honey! Miss Honey! You'll never believe what I got you.
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, Matilda. Matilda.
:'''Matilda''': Oh. I also brought you this. I ate mine last night. ''[Gives Miss Honey her chocolate]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Miss Honey hides the doll behind her back]''
:'''Trunchbull''': I will be teaching your class today.
:'''Narrator''': In the time it took Miss Honey to get very, very nervous, Matilda had formulated a plan.
:'''Miss Honey''': She is really raving mad.
:'''Matilda''': What is it your father used to call you? Hummingbird?
:'''Miss Honey''': Bumblebee. I'm sure she knows the doll's missing.
:'''Matilda''': And he called her Trunchbull?
:'''Miss Honey''': No. I suppose he called her Agatha. Yeah.
:'''Matilda''': And she called him Magnus? Right?
:'''Miss Honey''': Yeah. Yes. …Maybe I could go back to the house and put the doll back while she's still at school. Oh, no. I can't do that.
:'''Matilda''': Calm down, Miss Honey. Really. It's going to be okay. I promise.
:'''Miss Honey''': Sweetheart, you promised you wouldn't go back into that house again.
:'''Matilda''': I didn't. I was on the garage roof. I did it with my powers.
:'''Miss Honey''': Okay. On the garage roof With your powers. I need to think. Let's see. Powers? ''[Matilda is making the water pitcher levitate; Miss honey keeps pushing it down]''
:'''Matilda''': Mm. Hmm. I think I've got them down. Watch this. ''[She makes it levitate once more as Miss Honey swipes her hand under it]'' No more Miss Nice Girl!
:'''Trunchbull''': Get inside! Inside! Quickly, run! Run! Run! Get against the wall! Against that wall. Quickly! Don't make me wait. Water! And hold the newt. Join the ranks! Move! I am here to teach you all a lesson! Sometimes in life, horrible and unexplainable things happen. These things are a test of character, …and I have character! …Form a line across the room, quickly! Run! Run! Run! Don't keep me wait-ing! Fill this gap! I expect you're wondering what I'm talking about, hmm? Yes. A child came to my house. I don't know how. I don't know when. I don't know why. ''[Holding Matilda’s red hair ribbon]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Miss Trunchbull, may I…
:'''Trunchbull''': No, you may not. But I know a child came. So, did you know it was illegal to enter someone's home without their permission?
:'''Students''': Yes, Miss Trunchbull.
:'''Boy''': Sir.
:'''Trunchbull''': Stand up straight! Stomach in! Shoulders back!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Trunchbull''': Do any of you recognize... this? Let's play a little game, shall we? Who was wearing a pretty red hair ribbon yesterday ''[tauntingly holding it in front of Matilda]'' and isn't wearing one today? Can you answer me that? Who does this disgusting ribbon belong to?!!? ''[Throwing it on the ground and spitting on it]'' I shall personally see to it, that the demented, slime-breathed, little Lilliputian who owns this DISGUSTING ribbon… will never see the light of day again! YOU!!!! ''[pointing at Matilda]''
:'''Miss Honey''': Miss Trunchbull, I was the one who was at your house last night. I know that I--
:''[Trunchbull grabs Miss Honey's wrist and attempts to break it]''
:'''Trunchbull''': I broke your arm once before. I can do it again, Jenny.
:''[Miss Honey uses her other hand to get Trunchbull's hand off]''
:'''Miss Honey''': I am not seven years old anymore, Aunt Trunchbull.
:''[Everyone gasps]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Shut your holes! You will be put away in a place where not even the crows can land their droppings on you.
:''[As Trunchbull grabs Matilda until one of students saw something]''
:'''Students''': Look! ''[A piece of chalk levitates, as Trunchbull turns around and sees the blinds opening and closing]'' The chalk! And the blinds!
:''[The blinds are opening and closing, the chalk is writing on the board]''
:'''Students''': A G A T H A. ''[Trunchbull watches in horror as the chalk writes]'' THIS IS MAGNUS. GIVE MY LITTLE BUMBLEBEE BACK HER HOUSE AND HER MONEY.
:'''Trunchbull''': ''[Fearfully]'' Money!?
:'''Students''': ''[Continue reading]'' THEN GET OUT OF TOWN. IF YOU DON'T, I WILL GET YOU. I WILL GET YOU LIKE YOU GOT ME. THAT IS A PROMISE. ''[Matilda is using her powers to hit the Trunch with the erasers, after a while of being attacked by the erasers, The Trunchbull faints, Matilda opens the blinds with her powers, the students look at Miss Trunchbull’s unconscious body, however, unbeknownst to them, The Trunch opens one eye at the camera, and quickly turns her head towards the other students, scaring them in the process]''
:'''Trunchbull''': Aaaahhh!
:'''Boy''': Aaaahhhhhhh!
:''[students gasp]''
:'''Boy''': Aaaahhhhhhhh!
:''[Students gasp again]''
:'''Miss Honey''': No, no, no. No. No. Miss Trunchbull. Please don't throw him.
:'''Boy''': Aaaahhhhhh! Aaaahhhhhhhhhhh!
:''[the Trunch throws a boy out the window. Matilda makes him fly back into the room]''
:'''Boy''': Woo woo woo! Woo-Hoo! Woo! Woo-Hoo-Hoo! Woo!
:''[Trunchbull tries to run from the boy, but the boy pushes her on to the globe, Miss Honey silently tells Matilda to spin the globe, which she obeys, Trunchbull spins around in circles until she flies off and falls on to the floor]''
:''[the Trunch is disoriented from Matilda spinning her on the globe and gets back up feeling all dizzy, when the Trunch regains consciousness, she notices Lavender, and charges toward like an angry bull, until Matilda lifts her up as the Trunch crashes through the door and lands on the floor of the hallway, Matilda then uses her powers to summon the student’s lunchboxes to have the students pelt the Trunch with their food]''
:'''Amanda''': Woah!
:'''Hortensia''': It's the Trunch!
:''[Miss Honey’s class starts to pelt food at Miss Trunchbull]''
:'''Bruce''': Wow!
:'''Hortensia''': Hey, you guys, look at this!
:'''Bruce''': Yes!
:'''Matilda''': Let go.
:'''Lavender''': ''[slowly levitates safely down to the ground]'' Wooooooow. Cool. I didn't know I could do that.
:'''Matilda''': Pretty good, huh?
:''[as students continue throwing their food from their lunch boxes at the Trunch, she antt to escape, but gasps in horror at the sight of a gargantuan crowd of other students in front of her, holding food, water balloons, and other objects, ready to hurl them at her, as the Trunch attempts to leave, the army of students assail the Trunch with their food, as she passes by Bruce, Bruce shoves chocolate cake into her mouth]''
:'''Bruce''': Ha ha! Yeah!
:''[Trunchbull runs out of the school as the students chase her outside and continue to pelt her with food, while students from the second floor of the school throw water balloons and rolls of toilet paper at her from above, the Trunch retreats to her car, and cowardly drives away in reverse, the students cheer, finally ridding the school of the Trunch for good, while Matilda hugs Lavender]''
:'''Narrator''': And the Trunchbull was gone. Never to be seen or heard from, never to darken a doorway again.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': Miss Honey moved back into her father's house. Of course, Matilda was a frequent visitor.
:'''Miss Honey''': Tea time.
:'''Matilda''': Did you know that the heart of a mouse beats at the rate of 650 times a minute?
:'''Miss Honey''': My…. Where did you learn that?
:'''Matilda''': In a book. It beats so fast that it doesn't sound like it's beating at all. It sounds like it's humming. A porcupine's heart beats 300 times a minute.
:'''Harry''': Wait!
:'''Zinnia''': Hey, you. Hey. We're leaving. Let's go. Get in the car. Hurry up. …Let's wrap up these cookies. Come on. We're leaving. Now!
:'''Miss Honey''': I'd be happy to walk her home.
:'''Zinnia''': Well, nobody'll be there. We're moving to Guam. Come on. Let's go.
:'''Miss Honey''': Guam?
:'''Zinnia''': Yeah. Daddy's not gonna be in the auto business anymore.
:'''Matilda''': I don't want to leave!
:'''Zinnia''': We're going on a permanent vacation.
:'''Harry''': ''[from the Wormwood family's car's shotgun window]'' Yeah, and we've gotta beat the speedboat salesmen to the airport.
:'''Matilda''': I love it here! I want to keep going to my school! It isn't fair!
:'''Matilda''': ''[to Miss Honey]'' Miss Honey? Please don't make them...!
:'''Harry''': Get in the car, Melinda!
:'''Matilda''': Matilda!
:'''Harry''': Whatever.
:'''Matilda''': I want to be with Miss Honey!
:'''Zinnia''': Miss Honey doesn't want you! Why would she want some snotty, disobedient kid?!
:'''Miss Honey''': Because she's a spectacularly wonderful child, and I love her.
:'''Matilda''': Adopt me, Miss Honey! You can adopt me.
:''[Harry grabs Matilda and tries to lead her to the car.]''
:'''Harry''': ''[to Matilda]'' Look, I don't have time for all these legalities.
:''[Harry --after saying this-- holds Matilda in his grasp.]''
:'''Matilda''': One second, Dad. I have the adoption papers.
:''[Matilda breaks out from her father's grasp. And she opens her mother's purse and takes out the adoption documents.]''
:'''Zinnia''': What? Where did you get those?
:'''Matilda''': From a book in the library. I've had them since I was big enough to Xerox.
:'''Zinnia''': Are you hearing this, Harry?
:'''Harry''': ''[sighs]''
:'''Matilda''': All you have to do is sign them.
:'''Michael''': ''[from the car window]'' I am going to be an only child again.
:'''Harry''': Shut up! I-I-I can't think with all these sirens. What do you think, pumpkin?
:''[Zinnia looks for a moment and in dismay, she turns to Matilda.]''
:'''Zinnia''': You're the only daughter I ever had, Matilda. I never understood you. Not one little bit. Who's got a pen?
:'''Harry''': Here.
:'''Zinnia''': Thanks.
:'''Narrator''': And doing perhaps the first decent thing they ever did for their daughter, the Wormwoods signed the adoption papers.
:'''Matilda''': And here. And here.
:'''Harry''': All right. Come on. Turn around. You're not gonna be calling us for support payments, or nothing like that, huh?
:'''Miss Honey''': Oh, no. We'll have everything we need. Don't worry.
:'''Harry''': All right. Here. Let's roll.
:''[The scene cuts to Matilda and Miss Honey. Miss Honey --Matilda's teacher --picks up Matilda and hugs her]''
:'''Zinnia''': Ciao!
:''[Rusted Root's song &quot;Send Me on My Way&quot; plays]''
:'''Narrator''': So, Harry and Zinnia got away.
:''[As the narrator continues narrating, Matilda lives a happy life with her teacher Miss Honey, that is, both at school and Miss Honey's house.]''
:'''Narrator''': ''[continues]'' And as bad as things were before, that's how good they became. Miss Honey was made principal of Crunchem Hall which had to add an upper school because children never wanted to leave. Then Matilda found to her great surprise, that life could be fun. And she decided to have as much of it as possible. After all, she was a very smart kid. But the happiest part of the story was that Matilda and Miss Honey had each gotten what they'd always wanted. A loving family. And Matilda never had to use her powers again. Well, I mean, &quot;Almost never&quot;.
:''[Finally, the scene goes to Matilda's childhood with Miss Honey at night. Matilda on her bed with Miss Honey. Matilda, she uses her powers to pick a book from the shelf. She opens it and starts reading. The book is titled MOBY DICK. This is one of the MOBY DICK books. And it is titled MOBY DICK AND THE WHITE WHALE.]''
:'''Matilda''': ''[reading]'' Call me Ishmael. Some years ago, never mind how long precisely, having little or no money in my purse and nothing particular to...
:''[The screen fades out into credits.]''

== Taglines ==
* A little magic goes a long way.
* Kids Rule!
* Somewhere inside all of us is the power to change the world.

== Cast ==
* [[w:Mara Wilson|Mara Wilson]] — [[w:Matilda Wormwood|Matilda Wormwood-Honey]]
* [[w:Danny DeVito|Danny DeVito]] — Harry Wormwood / Narrator
* [[w:Rhea Perlman|Rhea Perlman]] — Zinnia Wormwood
* [[w:Embeth Davidtz|Embeth Davidtz]] — Miss Jennifer &quot;Jenny&quot; Honey
* [[w:Pam Ferris|Pam Ferris]] — [[w:Miss Trunchbull|Agatha Trunchbull]]
* [[Paul Reubens]] — FBI Agent Bob
* [[w:Tracey Walter|Tracey Walter]] — FBI Agent Bill
* Kiami Davael — Lavender
* Kira Spencer Hesser — Hortensia
* Brian Levinson — Michael &quot;Mikey&quot; Wormwood
* Jimmy Karz — Bruce Bogtrotter
* Jacqueline Steiger — Amanda Thripp
* Marion Dugan — Cookie
* [[w:Jon Lovitz|Jon Lovitz]] — Mickey (host of ''The Million Dollar Sticky'') (''uncredited'')
* [[w:Jean Speegle Howard|Jean Speegle Howard]] — Mrs. Phelps

== External links ==
{{wikipedia|Matilda (1996 film)}}
* {{imdb title|id=0117008|title=Matilda}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=1072107-matilda|title=Matilda}}

[[Category:1996 films]]
[[Category:1990s British films]]
[[Category:1990s American films]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Fantasy films]]
[[Category:Films about friendship]]
[[Category:Films based on works by Roald Dahl]]
[[Category:Films set in California]]
[[Category:Films directed by Danny DeVito]]
[[Category:Films about revenge]]
[[Category:Films about bullying]]
[[Category:Films set in libraries]]
[[Category:Films set in schools]]
[[Category:Buddy films]]</text>
      <sha1>g40hvhfrquz2u0l3iwqfer76aimdp0z</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Simpsons/Season 5</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>31250</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965150</id>
      <parentid>3963156</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:05:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-24978-79</username>
        <id>3313403</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Homer and Apu */</comment>
      <origin>3965150</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="68879" sha1="o7fd8dhug6wml7lwt4xyoh08fj9dx5o" xml:space="preserve">{{DISPLAYTITLE:''The Simpsons''/Season 5}}
{{The Simpsons header}}
'''''[[w:The Simpsons|The Simpsons]]''''' (1989–present) is an American adult animated sitcom broadcast by the Fox Broadcasting Company created by [[Matt Groening]]. The series is a satirical depiction of American life, epitomized by the Simpson family.

===''[[w:Homer's Barbershop Quartet|Homer's Barbershop Quartet]]''===
:'''Bart''': Dad, when did you record an album?
:'''Homer''': I'm surprised you don't remember, son. It was only 8 years ago.
:'''Bart''': Dad, thanks to television I can't remember what happened 8 minutes ago.
:''[all Simpsons but Bart start laughing]''
:'''Bart''': No really, I can't, it's a serious problem!
:''[everyone laughs again, and Bart finally relents and laughs too]''
:'''Bart''': What're we all laughing about?
:'''Homer''': Who cares?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': David Crosby? You're my hero!
:'''[[David Crosby]]''': Oh, you like my music?
:'''Barney''': You're a musician?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After the Grammy Awards...]''
:'''Homer''': ''Then came to the greatest thrill of my life.''
:'''[[George Harrison]]''': Hello, Homer, I'm George Harrison.
:'''Homer''': Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Where did you get that brownie?
:'''Harrison''': Over there. There's a big pile of 'em.
:'''Homer''': ''[walks over to the brownies and wolfs down a whole bunch]'' Oh, man.
:'''Harrison''': ''[completely sincere]'' Well, what a nice fellow.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Be Sharps are going through hard times.]''
:'''Homer, Skinner, and Apu''': ''[singing tiredly]'' ''For all the latest medical poop''
:''Call Surgeon General [[C. Everett Koop]]''
:''Koop Koop-a-doop''
:'''[[w:Apu Nahasapeemapetilon|Apu]]''': ''[to Homer]'' This is worse than your song about [[Mr. T]].
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': I pity the fool who doesn't like... he. And where's Barney?
:'''Principal Skinner''': Oh, he's with [[Yoko Ono|his new girlfriend, the Japanese conceptual artist]].
:''[Barney and his girlfriend walk in, and Barney inserts a demo tape into a recorder]''
:'''Barney''': Barbershop is in danger of growing stale. I'm taking it to strange new places.
:''[On the recorder]''
:'''Barney's Girlfriend''': [[w:Revolution 9|Number eight... ''[Barney belches]'' Number eight... ''[Barney belches]'' Number eight... ''[Barney belches]'']]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[during the closing credits]'' I'd like to thank you on behalf of the group, and I hope we passed the audition. ''[Everyone laughs, including Barney. After the laughter dies down]''
:'''Barney''': I don't get it.

===''[[w:Cape Feare|Cape Feare]]''===

:''[after seeing an episode of ''Up Late with McBain'', where Rainier Wolfcastle gets booed for his homophobic joke about Scoey's outfit]''
:'''Bart''' ''[disgusted]'': This is ''horrible''!
:'''Lisa''' ''[disappointed, but not surprised]'': The FOX network has sunk to a new low.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa and Bart''': AAAH! SIDESHOW BOB!
:'''Bart''': ''You'' wrote me those letters!
:'''Marge''': You awful man! Stay away from my son!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': ''[menacing]'' Oh, I'll stay away from your son, all right! Stay away... FOREVER!
:'''Homer''': Oh no!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': Wait a minute. That's no good. ''[walks away, then runs back]'' Wait, I've got a good one now! Marge, say &quot;stay away from my son&quot; again.
:'''Marge''': No!
:''[Sideshow Bob grumbles and walks away]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Blue-Haired Lawyer|Blue-Haired Lawyer]]''': But what about that tattoo on your chest?  Doesn't it say, &quot;Die Bart, Die?&quot;
:'''Sideshow Bob''': No, that's German for &quot;The Bart, The.&quot;
:'''Juror''': No one who speaks German could be an evil man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Now Sideshow Bob can't get in without me knowing. And once a man is in your home, anything you do to him is nice and ''[winks]'' legal.
:'''Homer''': Is that so? ''[yells out kitchen window]'' Oh, Flanders? Won't you join me in my kitchen? ''[Ned turns off the hose. Homer stands on the wall next to the kitchen arch, preparing to strike Flanders]'' Heh-heh-heh-heh...
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Uh, it doesn't work when you invite 'em.
:'''Ned''': Hidilly-hey!
:'''Homer''': Go home.
:'''Ned''': Toodledy-do!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer has hired a detective to take care of Sideshow Bob]''
:'''Detective''': Now, don't you fret. When I'm through, he won't set foot in this town again. I can be very, ''very'' persuasive. ''[Holsters a gun]''
:''[Detective is at a bar with Sideshow Bob]''
:'''Detective''': ''[whining]'' C'mon, leave town!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': No.
:'''Detective''': I'll be your friend!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': No.
:'''Detective''': Oh, you're mean!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the Simpsons are being placed in the Federal Witness Protection Program]''
:'''FBI Agent #1''': Tell you what, sir, from now on, you'll be Homer Thompson at Terror Lake. Let's just practice a bit, hmm? When I say &quot;hello, Mr. Thompson&quot;, you'll say &quot;hi&quot;.
:'''Homer''': Check!
:'''FBI Agent #1''': Hello, Mr. Thompson. ''[Homer doesn't respond and stares blankly]'' Remember now, your name is Homer Thompson.
:'''Homer''': I gotcha.
:'''FBI Agent #1''': Hello, Mr. Thompson.
:''[again Homer doesn’t respond and stares blankly. The FBI agents exchange looks]''
:''[hours pass by]''
:'''FBI Agent #1''': ''[frustrated]'' Argh... Now when I say &quot;hello, Mr. Thompson&quot; and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.
:'''Homer''': No problem.
:'''FBI Agent #1''': ''[stepping hard on Homer's foot]'' Hello, Mr. Thompson.
:'''Homer''': ''[still doesn't respond and stares blankly again for a few seconds, then whispers to the other FBI agent]'' I think he's talking to you.
:''[the FBI agent facepalms]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer busts into Bart's room at night with glowing eyes and a knife]''
:'''Homer''': '''BART DO YOU WANT SOME BROWNIES BEFORE YOU GO TO BED?!'''
:''[Bart screams]''
:''[Homer switches back to normal, holding a brownie tray]''
:'''Homer''': Let me cut you a brownie while they're still hot!
:'''Bart''': Dad, I'm kind of edgy right now. I'd appreciate you not coming in my room screaming and brandishing a butcher's knife!
:'''Homer''': Why? ''[looks at the knife in his hand]'' Oh, right! The Sideshow Bob thing! I'm sorry, boy.
:''[Homer puts the knife down, kisses Bart gently on the forehead, and walks out of the room. Bart turns over to go to sleep and Homer busts back in.]''
:'''Homer''': '''BART YOU WANNA SEE MY NEW CHAINSAW AND HOCKEY MASK?!''' ''[stands over Bart revving the chainsaw]''
:''[Bart screams louder]''
:''[Homer returns to normal]''
:'''Homer''': Oh, sorry! What ''am'' I thinking?
:''[Homer kisses Bart on the forehead and walks out of the room]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Hold it right there, Sideshow Bob. You're under arrest.
:'''Sideshow Bob''': ''[furious]'' '''''By Lucifer's beard!'''''
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Uh, yeah. It's a good thing you drifted by this brothel.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

:'''Bart''': Take 'im away, boys.
:'''Wiggum''': Hey, I'm the chief here! Bake 'im away, toys.
:'''Lou''': What'd you say, chief?
:'''Wiggum''': Do what the kid says.

===''[[w:Homer Goes to College|Homer Goes to College]]''===
:'''Female Intercom''': [''as the dog pulls the level to stop a meltdown''] Meltdown averted. Good boy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer is sitting in a nuclear inspection van]''
:'''Male NRC agent''': Homer, this is an exact replica of your work station. 
:'''Homer''': Hm?
:'''Male NRC agent''': Now, we're going to simulate a power surge in core sector eight.
:'''Homer''': What the hell are you talking about? 
:''[The agents slam the door of the van shut, and slide open a peephole to watch Homer]''
:'''Homer''': ''[blubbering]'' What do I do? What do I do? In the name of God, you've gotta tell me!
:'''Male NRC agent''': Relax! It's just a simulator. Nothing can go wrong.
:'''Homer''': ''[to himself]'' Just poke blindly at the controls until they let you go.
:''[Homer shields his eyes and pushes random buttons, inexplicably causing a meltdown]''
:'''Male NRC agent''': No, no! This... can't be happening!
:''[Smithers and Mr. Burns run to an escape pod. Burns seals the door; Smithers desperately pounds on it]''
:'''Smithers''': For the love of God, sir, there are two seats!
:'''Mr Burns''': ''[reopens the door]'' I like to put my feet up.
:''[Homer emerges from the crater, glowing a radioactive green.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Raargh! Must... destroy... mankind! ''[his watch beeps]'' Ooh, lunchtime. ''[Homer shakes off the radiation and walks off]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Male NRC agent''': I'm still not sure how he caused the meltdown.  There wasn't any nuclear material in the truck!
:'''Mr. Burns''': Oh, very well, it's time for your bribe. Now, you can either have the washer and dryer where the lovely Smithers is standing, or you can trade it all in for what's in this box.
:'''Male NRC agent''': The box, the box!
:'''Female NRC agent''': Look, Burns, this is a big problem. You can't just throw money at it and make it go away.
:''[Mayor Quimby appears, wearing a fur coat that still has the $5,000 price tag attached to it.]''
:'''[[w:Joe Quimby|Mayor Quimby]]''': Gentlemen, I've decided there will be, uh, no investigation. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go away. ''[departs]''
:'''Male NRC agent''': You're in big trouble, Burns. Homer Simpson's job requires college training in nuclear physics.  Now you get your man up to speed, or we'll be forced to take legal action.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Is that so? Well, I have a feeling you'll be... ''dropping'' the charges.
:''[Burns presses a button on his desk. A trapdoor opens a few feet behind the NRC agents, who stare at it in confusion.]''
:'''Smithers''': The painters moved your desk, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Ah, yes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': You [Homer] must find the Jade Monkey before the next full moon.
:'''Smithers''': Actually sir we found the Jade Monkey; it was in your glove compartment.
:'''Mr. Burns''': And the road maps and ice scraper?
:'''Smithers''': They were in there too sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Excellent, it's all falling into place.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer, Bart and the nerds have captured Sir Oinkcelot]''
:'''Homer''': Look! You pull its tail straight and it curls right back up again! ''[He begins pulling the pig's tail]'' Curly, straight! Curly, straight! Curly, straight! Curly, straight! ''[Sir Oinkcelot starts squealing in agony]''
:'''Doug''': Mr. Simpson, I don't think he likes that.
:'''Homer''': Of course he does! He's a cute little piggy! ''[Continues pulling Sir Oinkcelot's tail]'' Curly, straight! Curly, straight! ''[The pig viciously bites Homer on his hand]'' OW!! ''[turns red with anger]'' WHY YOU LITTLE...! ''[Homer lunges at Sir Oinkcelot, but Bart and the nerds restrain him]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Hello, Dean? You're a stupid-head!
:'''Peterson''': ''[looks out the window]'' Homer, is that you?
:''[Homer screams and flees the payphone]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': YES! Take ''that'', Bitterman!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': [''sees Snake Jailbird''] Hey, that's not the wallet inspector.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Professor''': Good morning, and welcome to Nuclear Physics 101. I see a lot of new faces, but you know the old saying: &quot;Out with the old, in with the ''nucleus''&quot; ''[Every student in the class except Homer bursts out with laughter]'' Now, let's just get started on the- whoops. ''[He drops his lecture notes, this time Homer explodes with laughter]''
:'''Homer''': Oh, did you see that jerk! He dropped his notes! ''[Homer continues laughing obnoxiously loud]''

===''[[w:Rosebud (The Simpsons)|Rosebud]]''===
:'''Smithers''': Who's Bobo, sir?
:'''Mr. Burns''': Bobo? Oh I meant ''Lobo'', uh, ''[[w:The Misadventures of Sheriff Lobo|Sheriff Lobo]]''. They ''never'' should have cancelled that show. What were they thinking?
:'''Smithers''': Oh, I see. On another topic, the preparations for your birthday have begun.
:'''Mr. Burns''': I won't get what I really want.
:'''Smithers''': No one does.
:''[Smithers briefly imagines Burns popping out of a cake naked and wearing only a sash like [[Marilyn Monroe]]]''
:'''Fantasy Mr. Burns''': ''[singing]'' ''[[w:Happy Birthday Mr. President|Happy Birthday, Mr. Smithers...]]''
:'''Smithers''': ''[smiles]'' Mmmm...
:''[At the Simpsons' house, Homer is tossing and turning in his sleep]''
:'''Homer''': Lobo...Lobo... Bring back Sheriff Lobo!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer is doing comedy at Burns' party.]''
:'''Homer''': Are you ready to laugh?
:'''Man in Audience''': Ugh, that poor dog.
:'''Homer''': I said, are you ready to laugh?!
:'''Woman in Audience''': Quiet, you awful man!
:'''Homer''': You know, Mr. Burns is ''so'' cheap--
:'''Mr. Burns''': What?
:'''Homer''': Er, I mean you know, Mr. Burns is so ''old''--
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[pounds the table]'' How ''dare you''!
:'''Homer''': Whoa! Tough crowd. Better bring out the big guns... ''[clears throat]'' Here's an impression of Mr. Burns that you might find, a little &quot;cheeky&quot;.
:''[Homer moons the crowd, revealing a face painted on his buttocks; everyone in the audience gasps]''
:'''Homer''': ''[mockingly]'' I'm Mr. Burns, blah, blah, blah! Do this, do that, blah, blah, blah! I think I'm so big, blah blah ''blaaah!''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Destroy him. ''[one of Burns' security staff whacks Homer over the head with a baton, leaving him unconscious]'' This party is over. ''[the security staff start attacking other party guests at random]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Mr. Burns' party, Homer is nursing the lump on his head he got during his comedy act at Burns' party]''
:'''Homer''': Aw, where did I lose 'em? I'll never wiggle my bare butt in public again.
:'''Lisa''': I'd like to believe that this time. I really would.
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': Bart, run down to the store and get a bag of ice for your father.
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Yes'm. Dad, I know you're discouraged, but please, don't deny the world your fat can.
:'''Homer''': Don't worry, boy. He'll be ready for your Aunt Selma's birthday.
:'''Lisa''': I knew it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Smithers and Mr. Burns are crawling across the ceiling of the Simpson home, using suction cups. They freeze when Homer walks to the refrigerator]''
:'''Homer''': Mmmm... 64 slices of [[w:American cheese|American cheese]]. ''[sits at the table and begins eating one at a time]'' 64...63...''[Time passes to morning]'' 2...1.
:'''Marge''': ''[entering]'' Have you been up all night eating cheese?
:'''Homer''': I think I'm blind.
:''[Smithers and Mr. Burns fall the the floor and get up]''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Good day to you.
:''[They both leave]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney The Dinosaur:''' Two plus two is four... two plus two is four... two plus two is four.
:'''Homer:''' Hehehe. I can see why this is so popular.

===''[[w:Treehouse of Horror IV|Treehouse of Horror IV]]''===
:''[first lines]''
:'''Bart''': ''[walking in front of a set of paintings]'' Paintings: Lifeless images rendered in colorful goop. But at night, they take on a life of their own. They become portals to hell! So scary and horrible...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Devil Ned has give Homer an enchanted doughnut.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Oooh!
:'''[[w:Ned Flanders|Devil Ned]]''': Now, remember, the instant you finish it, I own your soul for...
: ''[Homer has already scarfed the doughnut, except for one small piece.]''
:'''Homer''': Hey, wait. If I don't finish this last bite, you don't get my soul, do you?
:'''Devil Ned''': Well, technically, no, but...
:'''Homer''': ''[sing-song]'' I'm smarter than the Devil! I'm smarter than the Dev--
:''[Devil Ned angrily transforms into a huge, red demon.]''
:'''Devil''': ''[deep voice]'' '''YOU ARE NOT SMARTER THAN ME! I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL YET, HOMER SIMPSON!!'''
:''[He vanishes into the floor. Homer smugly puts the last doughnut piece into his pocket.]''
:'''Homer''': Not likely. He, he, he.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[In Hell Labs Ironic Punishment Division, Homer is strapped to a chair where a blue demon arrives]''
:'''Blue Demon''': So, you like donuts, eh?
:'''Homer''': Uh-huh.
:'''Blue Demon''': Well! Have all the donuts in the world!
:''[He starts laughing as Homer is force fed donuts. 15 minutes later, it's revealed that this torture has backfired as Homer still hasn't had enough.]''
:'''Homer''': More.
:'''Blue Demon''': I don't understand it. [[:w:James Coco|James Coco]] went mad in 15 minutes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Devil Ned''': I give you the Jury of the Damned: [[Benedict Arnold]], [[:w:Lizzie Borden|Lizzie Borden]], [[Richard Nixon]].
:'''[[Richard Nixon]]''': But I’m not dead yet. In fact, I just wrote an article for [[:w:Redbook|Redbook]].
:'''Devil Ned''': Hey, listen, I did a favor for you.
:'''[[Richard Nixon]]''': Yes, master.
:'''Devil Ned''': [[:w:John Wilkes Booth|John Wilkes Booth]], [[:w:Blackbeard|Blackbeard the Pirate]], [[:w:John Dillinger|John Dillinger]]. And the starting line of the [[:w:1976 Philadelphia Flyers–Red Army game|1976 Philadelphia Flyers]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Devil Ned''': Alright Simpson, you get your soul back. But let that ill-gotten doughnut be ''FOREVER ON YOUR HEAD!!!''
:'''Homer''': ''[screams]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': ''[sees a school bus inside the painting]'' The School Bus? Oh, they must mean The Ghoul Bus!
:'''Lisa''': Nope, says right there: ''[points the painting and reads it]'' &quot;School Bus&quot;.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': ''[sees a gremlin on the school bus during a trip and screams]'' Everybody! There's a monster on the side of the bus!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[horrified at the Dogs Playing Poker painting]'' They're dogs, and they're playing poker!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Simpsons arrive at Mr. Burns' castle. Homer rings the doorbell.]
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': ''[via intercom]'' Welcome, come in. ''[sinisterly, still heard on intercom]'' Ah, fresh victims for my ever growing army of the undead.
:'''[[w:Waylon Smithers|Smithers]]''': Sir, you have to let go of the button.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Oh, son of a bi-- ''[door opens]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': BART! How many times have I told you not to bite your sis— Wait a minute! You ARE a vampire!
:'''Grampa''': QUICK!! We have to kill the boy!!
:'''Marge''': How'd you know he's a vampire?
:'''Grampa''': He's a vampire? ''[screams]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marge''': We've got to do something! Today, he's drinking people's blood - tomorrow, he could be smoking!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Simpsons arrive at Mr. Burns's crypt. Homer opens his casket and is ready to stake him.]
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Take that, vile fiend! ''[starts staking Burns repeatedly]''
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': Uh, dad? That's his crotch.
:'''Homer''': Oh.. sorry. ''[puts stake to his heart]'' BAH''!!''
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[screams]''
:''[He quivers then stops and melts into mold]''
:'''Homer''': ''[relieved]'' Aah...
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[comes back to life]'' YOU'RE FIRED!!! ''[melts into mold and dies again]''
:'''Homer''': D'OH!

===''[[w:Marge on the Lam|Marge on the Lam]]''===
:'''Rescue Worker 1''': Homer, this is never easy to say, I'm going have to saw your arms off.
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': They'll grow back, right?
:'''Rescue Worker''': Oh...yeah.
:'''Homer''': Whew.
:''[the rescue worker starts the rotary saw and moves it toward Homer's arm]''
:'''Rescue Worker 2''': Homer, are you just holding on to the can?
:'''Homer''': Your point being?
:''[Homer leaves with everyone laughing at him]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': You're absolutely right, Homer. We don't need a babysitter.
:'''Homer''': ''[suspicious]'' Wait a second... ''[pulls a card from his pocket: &quot;ALWAYS DO OPPOSITE OF WHAT BART SAYS&quot;]'' Hmm...you kids ''do'' need a babysitter.
:'''Bart''': Blast that infernal card! ''[to Homer]'' ''Don't'' give that card to me.
:'''Homer''': Here you g-- ''[pulls back]'' No!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Lionel Hutz''': Mr. Simpson, I was just going through your garbage, when I couldn't help but overhear you are in need of a babysitter. Now, as a highly-skilled attorney, my fee is $175 an hour.
:'''Homer''': We pay $8.00 for the night and you can take two Popsicles out of the freezer.
:'''Lionel Hutz''': Three.
:'''Homer''': Two.
:'''Lionel Hutz''': Okay, two, and I get to keep this old birdcage.
:'''Homer''': Done.
:'''Lionel Hutz''': ''[to himself]'' Still got it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(as Ruth and Marge are taking in the breathtaking view of Springfield)''
:'''Ruth Powers''': Look. You can see our houses.
:'''Marge''': Hmm. There's an awful lot of black smoke coming from my chimney.
:''(cut to the Simpsons living room. Lionel Hutz is throwing piles of his personal effects into the fireplace while Bart and Lisa watch)''
:'''Lisa''': Mr. Hutz, why are you burning all your personal papers?
:'''Lionel Hutz''': As of this moment, Lionel Hutz no longer exists. ''(cheerfully)'': Say hello to Miguel Sanchez!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart and Lisa wake up the next day on the couch]''
:'''Bart''': Hey, it's morning and Mom and Dad aren't home yet.
:'''Lisa''': Don't worry. Mr. Hutz is still here to take care of us.
:''[Lisa budges Lionel Hutz awake. He growls menacingly and brandishes a knife]''
:'''Lionel Hutz''': ''[defensively]'' Don't touch my stuff! ''[realizes that he just scared Bart, Lisa, and Maggie; sheepishly, as he sits on the couch with a confused expression on his face]'' H-Hey, this isn't the YMCA.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(Dragnet-style epilogue of what happened to everyone involved in the episode)''
:'''Narrator''': Ruth Powers was tried in Springfield Superior Court. The judge dismissed her ex-husband's auto theft charges and forced him to pay all back child support. Mr. Powers blamed the outcome on his lawyer, one Lionel Hutz. Lionel Hutz, A.K.A. Miguel Sanchez, A.K.A., Dr. Nguyen van Thuoc, was paid $8 for his 32 hours of babysitting, he was glad to get it. Marge Simpson was charged with the violation of penal code section 618A: Wanton Destruction of Precious Antique Cans. She was ordered to pay 50 cents to replace the cans and $2000 in punitive damage and mental anguish. Homer Simpson was remanded to the custody of the United States Army Neurochemical Research Center at Fort Meade, Maryland, for extensive testing.
:'''Homer''': Woohoo!

===''[[w:Bart's Inner Child|Bart's Inner Child]]''===
:'''Homer''': Oh no you don't! That trampoline is mine! ''[crashes into the other car]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[as the trampoline jumps on him repeatedly onto a cliff]'' If this were a cartoon, the cliff would break off now. ''[dissolves to nighttime]'' I'm thirsty. ''[This causes the cliff to break, and fall off]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Troy McClure|Troy McClure]]''': Hi! I'm Troy McClure!
:'''Brad Goodman''': And I'm Brad Goodman.
:'''[[w:Troy McClure|Troy McClure]]''': You might remember me from such self-help videos as 'Smoke Yourself Thin' and 'Get Confident, Stupid!'
:'''Brad Goodman''': And you know me about such-help videos.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brad Goodman''': I want you all to close your eyes and listen to your inner child. Listen, what's he saying?
:'''Ned's Inner Child''': Stay on the course big Ned, you're doing super! ''[Ned smiles]''
:'''Homer's Inner Child''': ''[points to his mouth]'' Food goes in here.
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': It sure does.
:'''Moe's Inner Child''': ''[in Italian accent]'' Hey-a Moe, what's-tha mattah? Ya no talking wit ya accent-a no more.
:'''[[w:Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': ''[slaps face]'' ''Mamma mia!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': A new mood is in the air in Springfield as refreshing as a moistened towelette. Folks are finally accepting their feelings and freely communicating with no holding back. And this reporter thinks it's about ''[beep]''ing time! Of course all these good feelings can be traced to one feisty little scamp who taught us that if it feels good, do it! ''[squirts whipped cream into his mouth]''
:'''Bart''': Lis, today I am a God.
:'''Lisa''': Is that why you're sitting on an ice cream sandwich?
:'''Bart''': Ewww...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': And I'm really enjoying this so called... iced cream!
:'''Smithers''': Sir, in the spirit of the festival and everything, I'd just like to say that.... I... love you.
:'''Burns''': Hm?
:'''Smithers''': In those colors! ''[to himself]'' Oh, who am I kidding? The boathouse was the time!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Principal Skinner''': Darn! They're very slowly getting away!
:'''Moe''': Looks like they're headed for the old mill!
:'''Principal Skinner''': No they're not.
:'''Moe''': Well, let's go to the old mill anyway! Get some cider!

===''[[w:Boy-Scoutz 'n the Hood|Boy-Scoutz 'n the Hood]]''===
:'''Bart''': Aw man, how are we supposed to kill the rest of the afternoon?
:'''Hobo''': You mustn't kill time boys, you must cherish it, seize the day. Can I have some change to go get me loaded?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Milhouse''': Hey, don't bogart that Squishee! ''[Barney chugs junkie]''
:'''Barney''': I dunno where you magic pixies came from, but I like your pixie drink.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals, except the [[w:weasel|weasel]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Milhouse Van Houten|Milhouse]]''': You're lucky. You only joined the Junior Campers. I got a dirty word shaved into the back of my head.
:''[Skinner walks by and stops when he sees the unseen &quot;dirty word&quot; in the back of Milhouse's head.]''
:'''[[w:Seymour Skinner|Principal Skinner]]''': What is it with you boys and that word? ''[grabs Milhouse]'' I'm going to shave you bald, young man, until you learn that hair is not a right, it's a privilege.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[While looking for a peanut under the couch, Homer pulls out a 20 dollar bill]''
:'''Homer''': Awww, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut.
:'''Homer's Brain''': Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
:'''Homer''': Explain how!
:'''Homer's Brain''': Money can be exchanged for goods and services.
:'''Homer''': Woo-hoo!
:''[Homer starts running to the door, slips on the peanut he was looking for, and drops the money]''
:'''Homer''': D'OH!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Ya see anything yet?
:'''Lou''': Nothing captain, someone took all the beer and cold cuts.
:'''Wiggum''': Oh, that's it. I'm not even casting off until we go to the store.

===''[[w:The Last Temptation of Homer|The Last Temptation of Homer]]''===
:''[first lines]''
:'''Bart''': The beauty of it is, each parking space is a mere one foot narrower indistinguishable to the naked eye but therein lies the game!
:'''Milhouse''': I fear to watch! I cannot turn away!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Charlie is explaining to Mr., Burns about the gas leak]''
:'''Charlie''': Well, sir, I won't bore you with the details of our miraculous escape, but we desperately need a real emergency exit.
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': Why, that's a fabulous idea. Anything else you'd like? How about real lead in the radiation shields? Urinal cakes, maybe? ''[hands Smithers a notebook]'' Smithers, throw this at him. ''[Smithers throws the book at Charlie. Mr. Burns right hand reaches under his desk and presses a button. A tube covers Charlie and sucks him upwards]'' Smithers, where does that tube go?
:'''[[w:Waylon Smithers|Smithers]]''': I'm not sure, sir; it was here when we moved in.
:''[Charlie then finds himself in an unnamed foreign country inhabited by cackling men wearing turbans. He is forced to dance to sitar music.]''
:'''Men''': Dance! Dance! Dance! Dance! ''[Charlie does so. The men start ululating maniacally]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Department of Labor Agent''': This plant violates ''every'' labor law in the book! We found a missing Brazilian soccer team working in your reactor core!
:'''Mr. Burns''': That plane crashed on ''my'' property!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Moe, I need your advice.
:'''[[w:Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': Yeah?
:'''Homer''': You see, I have this friend named Joey Joe Joe...Junior...Shabadoo.
:'''[[w:Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': Homer, that's the worst name I've ever heard. ''[a man in the bar runs out, crying]''
:'''[[w:Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': Hey, Joey Joe Joe!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[seeing the White House with Colonel Klink]'' Marge lives here?
:'''Man''': ''[voice only]'' Madam President, your approval rating is soar. ''[Marge murmurs]''
:'''Colonel Klink''': ''[sing-songy]'' This dream is over! ''[pops, Homer sends back in the phone booth]''
:'''Lionel Hutz''': ''[sees Homer stuck in the phone booth being knocked over]'' Hey, You! Get Out Of My Office!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[An alarm starts blaring at the power plant]''
:'''Smithers''': Someone is charging room service to the company, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Well we'll just see about that! ''[uncovers a cage hold several winged monkeys]'' [[w:The Wizard of Oz|Fly, my pretties! Fly!]] ''[the monkeys leap out of the window, only to plummet to their deaths]'' Oh...''[to Smithers]'' Continue the research.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': ''[to bullies in his normal self]'' Gentlemen, the nerd you knew is dead. Beat me, and you will be beating one of your own.
:'''Kearney''': Whatever! ''[they beat Bart anyway]''

===''[[w:$pringfield (or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)|$pringfield (or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)]]''===
:''[Homer puts on a pair of horn-rimmed glasses he finds floating in a toilet bowl.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': [[The Wizard of Oz|The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.]]
:'''Man in stall''': [[w: Pythagorean theorem|That's a ''right'' triangle]], ya idiot!
:'''Homer''': D'oh!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': Thank you for visiting our plant, Dr. Kissinger.
:'''[[Henry Kissinger]]''': It was fun.
:'''Smithers''': We'll let you know if your glasses turn up.
:'''[[Henry Kissinger]]''': Yes well, I'm sure I left them in the car. ''[thinking]'' No one must know I dropped them in the toilet. Not I, the man who drafted the [[w:Paris Peace Accords|Paris Peace Accords]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Kent Brockman|Kent Brockman]]''': Scott, things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the Unemployment Office, joblessness is no longer just for philosophy majors... now at the risk of sounding unpopular, this reporter places the blame for all of this squarely on you ''[pointing at the camera]'' the viewers!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother. I call him Gamblor; and it's time to free your mother from his neon claws.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Krusty''': I don't wanna get a ''sore'' spot, but can we talk about herpes? Herpes, herpes, bo-berpes, banana fana fo-ferpes! Herpes, OH!! Hey! Y'know [[w:Port-wine stain| that spot]] on [[w:Mikhail Gorbachev|Gorbachev's]] head? Herpes, trust me! Anybody here have herpes? Huh? Huh? You people are the worst audience I've ever seen!
:'''Man in Audience''': Yeah, well you're the worse comedian WE'VE ever seen!
:'''Krusty''': Great! Then we'll just sit here silently for the next 90 minutes!
:'''Man in Audience''': Fine with us! ''[Krusty then sits down on stage in dismay]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Smithers''': I'm afraid Robert Goulet hasn't arrived yet, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Very well, begin the thawing of Jim Nabors.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Smithers''': Excuse me, ma'am, don't you think you've gambled enough?
:'''Marge''': No.
:'''Smithers''': Okay. We're required by law to ask every 75 hours. Get her another free drink.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart brings Robert Goulet to his treehouse casino]''
:'''[[w:Robert Goulet|Robert Goulet]]''': Are you sure this is the place? I think I should call my manager.
:'''Nelson Muntz''': Your manager says for you to shut up!
:'''Goulet''': ''[surprised]'' Vera said that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[grabbing Marge]'' Yer gotta redda kid forrad yarrar!
:'''Marge''': Homer, what is it? Slow down!
:'''Homer''': ''[slowly, but still furious]'' J'yer gedda ferda redderarrar.
:'''Marge''': Think before you say each word.
:'''Homer''': You broke a promise to your child.
:'''Marge''': What?
:'''Homer''': You promised Lisa to help her with her costume. You made her cry. Then I cried. Then Maggie laughed -- she's such a little trooper.

===''[[w:Homer the Vigilante|Homer the Vigilante]]''===
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': ''[horrified]'' The burglar even took my stamp collection!
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': ''[amused]'' ''You'' had a stamp collection?
:''[The family all laugh at Bart, and the phone rings. Bart answers it.]''
:'''[[w:Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': ''[on the phone]'' Stamp collection? Ha-ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Kent Brockman|Kent Brockman]]''': Hordes of panicky people seem to be evacuating the town for some unknown reason. Professor, without knowing precisely what the danger is, would you say it's time for our viewers to crack each other's heads open and feast on the goo inside?
:'''[[w:Professor|Professor]]''': Mmm, yes I would, Kent.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Aw, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. Forty percent of all people know that.

===''[[w:Bart Gets Famous|Bart Gets Famous]]''===
:''[Marge convinces Bart to perform one more time.]''
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': You're right, Mom. I shouldn't let this bother me. I'm in television now. It's my job to be repetitive. My job. My job. Repetitiveness is my job. ''[to Marge]'' I'm gonna go out there and give the best performance of my life!
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': The best performance of your life?
:'''Bart''': The best performance of my life!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': ''[to Bart]'' And now you can go back to just being you, instead of a one-dimensional character with a silly catchphrase.
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': ''[breaking a lamp]'' D'oh!
:'''Bart''': Ay, caramba!
:'''Marge''': ''[groans]''
:'''[[w:Maggie Simpson|Maggie]]''': ''[sucks her pacifier]''
:'''[[w:Ned Flanders|Flanders]]''': Hi-dilly-ho!
:'''[[w:Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': ''[belches]''
:'''[[w:Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': Ha, ha!
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': Excellent.
:''[Long pause. Everyone looks expectantly at Lisa.]
:'''Lisa''': If anyone wants me, I'll be in my room. [She walks away.]
:'''Homer''': What kind of catchphrase is that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': I'm telling you, I do work on the Krusty show. Look at the Credits! [presses &quot;play&quot;]
:'''Krusty''': Bye bye, kids! ''[laughs]'' ''[credits roll, then after a few seconds they are squeezed for a news promo]''
:'''[[w:Kent Brockman|Kent Brockman]]''': I'm Kent Brockman. On the 11:00 news tonight, a certain kind of soft drink has been found to be lethal. We won't tell you which one after sports and the weather with Funny Sonny Storm.
:'''Bart''': ''[Pausing the tape and pointing to his name on the screen]'' There's my name, right here, Bart Simpson.
:'''[[w:Milhouse Van Houten|Milhouse]]''': Looks more like Brad Storch.
:'''[[w:Martin Prince|Martin]]''': No, it says Betty. Betty Symington.
:'''[[Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': ''[Punching Bart in the stomach]'' That's for taking credit for other people's work.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': ''[Reading news script]'' 'Tragic news tonight: a tidal wave in Kuala'... 'la'- la.... 'Pur'... 'Lam-pur'... France.
:''[Bart pops up and steals Kent's Danish.]''
:'''Bart''': Yoink!
:'''Kent Brockman''': Yoink? ''[After finding out his Danish is gone]'' [gasps]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': ''[Shuffling his papers]'' Yeah, I know I'm on. But I don't care. I don't read the news until I get my Danish. Go ahead, try to find a replacement.
:'''Bumbleebee Man''': ''[Pushing Kent off the chair and sitting on it]'' [clearing throat] 'A powerful tidal wave in Kuala Lumpur has killed 120 people.' Ay Chihuahua! Whoa, whoa, whoa! ''[Loses balance and falls over]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Announcer''': And now it's time for &quot;Match Game 2034&quot;, with [[Billy Crystal]]!
:'''Billy''': Hi!
:'''Announcer''': [[Farrah Fawcett|Farah Fawcett-Majors-O'Neal-Varney]]!
:'''Farah''': ''[Grunts]''
:'''Announcer''': The &quot;I didn't do it&quot; boy!
:'''Bart''': ''[Grunts]''
:'''Announcer:''': Ventriloquist [[Loni Anderson]]!
:'''Loni''': ''[sighs]''
:'''Announcer''': [[Spike Lee]]!
:'''Spike''': Mmm.
:'''Announcer''': And the always lovely and vivacious head of Kitty Carlisle!
:'''Kitty''': Hi, everybody: let's start the game!

===''[[w:Homer and Apu|Homer and Apu]]''===
:''[Homer is eating expired meat he bought at the Kwik-E-Mart]''
:'''Homer''' ''[as his stomach grumbles]'': Ooh! Stomach...churning! ''[keeps eating the expired ham. His stomach grumbling gets more intense. Begins to double over]'': Bowels...clenching. Not much time. ''[falls off the couch, off-screen]'': Must finish! ''[eating sounds]''
:''[Cut to an ambulance speeding down the street]''
:''[Establishing shot of Springfield General Hospital. Cut to a sick Homer in a hospital bed with Marge, the kids, and Dr. Hibbert standing over him]''
:'''Dr. Hibbert''': Well, sir, Homer's illness was either caused by ingesting spoiled food or...''[chuckles]'': some sort of voodoo curse.
:''[whip pan to Patty and Selma with a purse]''
:'''Patty''': Hey! We've just been working the eyes. ''[Selma holds up a Homer-shaped voodoo doll with 12 needles (six on each eye) in his eyes]''
:''[some time later]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Your old meat made me sick!
:'''[[w:Apu Nahasapeemapetilon|Apu]]''': Why, I'm so sorry. Please accept five pounds of frozen shrimp. ''[Homer picks up and sniffs a piece of shrimp]''
:'''Homer''': This shrimp isn't frozen – and it smells funny!
:'''Apu''': Okay, ten pounds.
:'''Homer''': Woo-hoo!
:''[Cut to the same ambulance as before speeding down the street]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': Good evening, here's an update on last week's nursing home exposé, &quot;Geezers in Freezers&quot; – it turns out the rest home ''was'' adequately heated; the footage you saw was of a fur-storage facility. We've also been told to apologize for using the term &quot;geezers&quot;. Now, coming up next, &quot;The Case of the Cantankerous Old Geezer.&quot;
:'''Homer''': ''[couch-ridden with salmonella]'' Oh... Urp! Rancid meat attack! Stupid parasites! Is there no way I can find justice?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent''': We've come up with a camera so tiny it fits into this oversized novelty hat. ''[puts hat on Homer, straining on pain]'' Now, go get us some incriminating footage. And remember: you have to get in and out for 10 minutes, or you suffer permanent neck damage.
:'''Man''': ''[neck horribly bent]'' He's not kiddin'.
:''[Homer walks towards the Kwik-E-Mart doors, swaying and weaving. Apu watches him, curious. Kent and others watch through the camera in the surveillance van]''
:'''Apu''': Huh?
:'''Homer''': Don't be alarmed, Apu. Just go about your daily routine like I'm not wearing the hat.
:'''Apu''': Your headgear seems to be emitting a buzzing noise, sir. Perhaps you have a bee in your bonnet.
:'''Homer''': Bee? Agh! Woo! Woo! Agh-agh-agghh! ''[Stomps on the hat and runs out. Homer returns to the van, gasping for air]''
:'''Kent''': Homer, that hat's been with the station for twenty years. He had one day left 'til retirement.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Apu is replenishing the hot dog roller, unaware the camera in the hat is filming him. He drops one on the floor, it rolls towards the hat, and we get a wretched close-up of the wiener]''
:'''Apu''': Oh, it is encrusted with filth. ''[blows it]'' Oh, well, let's sell it anyway. Now this is just between me and you, smashed hat. ''[he winks right into the camera]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Apu, if I've learned anything, it's that life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Apu''': That ''[the Kwik-E-Mart]'' is the sight of my spiritual de-pantsing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer and Apu are flying over the Himalayas]''
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No.
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No.
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No.
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No. Oh wait... [[w:Borders of India|Now we are.]]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Apu''': He is the benevolent, enlightened president and CEO of Kwik-E-Mart – and in Ohio, Stop-O-Mart. ''[CEO slurps his Squishee]'' He is the one I must ask to get my job back.
:'''CEO''': Approach, my sons.
:''[Homer and Apu approach the CEO's meditation point]''
:'''CEO''': You may ask me three questions.
:'''Apu''': That's great, because I only need one.
:'''Homer''': ''[interrupting]'' Are you really the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?
:'''CEO''': Yes.
:'''Homer''': Really?
:'''CEO''': Yes.
:'''Homer''': You?
:'''CEO''': Yes. I hope this has been enlightening for you.
:'''Apu''': But – I must—
:'''CEO''': Thank you, come again.
:'''Apu''': But—
:'''CEO''': Thank you, come again.
:''[Homer and Apu leave the convenient store]''
:'''Homer''': Well, that was a big bust. Is he ''really'' the head of the Kwik-E-Mart? ''[Apu growls, reaches towards Homer]'' No need to apologize, Apu – it was as much my fault as it was yours. ''[Apu pounces and strangles Homer]'' Okay, Apu ... I accept your apology! ''[both fight, topple off the path and fall down the mountain side]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[James Woods]]''': Apu, you saved my life. And as a small token of my appreciation, I got you your job back at the Kwik-E-Mart.
:'''Apu''': Oh! Oh, Mr. Woods, you're--
:'''Woods''': But as for me, I'm off to battle aliens on a faraway planet.
:'''Marge''': That sounds like a good movie.
:'''Woods''': Yes... yes, a... a movie, yes.

===''[[w:Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy|Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy]]''===
:''[Homer is buttering a muffin that he got out of an E-Z Bake Oven as he's driving]''
:'''Marge''': Mmm, I don't know if that's a good idea to do while you're driving.
:'''Homer''': Marge, that's what I bought it for.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Thanks for buying us these toys, Grampa.
:'''Grampa Simpson''' ''[dismissive]'': Bah! Why didn't you get something useful, like storm windows ''[as Lisa becomes sad]'': or a nice pipe organ? ''[whining]'': I'm thirsty. Ooh, what smells like mustard? ''[The Simpsons continue driving, ignoring Grampa as he continues complaining]'': There sure are a lot of ugly people in your neighborhood. ''[Homer turns the car into the driveway as Grampa points]'': Ooh! Lookit that one! ''[overhead shot of everyone [except Grampa] fleeing the car and running inside the house]'': Oh, my glaucoma just got worse! The President is a Demmycrat! ''[plaintive]'': Hello? I can't unbuckle my seat belt! Hello! ''[honks car horn, despite being in the backseat and allegedly not being able to unbuckle his seat belt]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Malibu Stacy Doll''': Don't ask me. I'm just a girl! Ha ha, ha ha!
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Right on, say it, sister.
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': It's not funny, Bart. Millions of girls will grow up thinking that this is the right way to act - that they can never be more than vacuous ninnies whose only goal in life is to look pretty, land a rich husband, and spend all day on the phone with their equally vacuous friends talkin' about how damned terrific it is to look pretty and have a rich husband!
:'''Bart''': Just what I was gonna say.
:''[Lisa angrily throws the doll out the living room window. Cut to Grampa Simpson riding a bike down the street]''
:'''Grampa Simpson''': Look at me! I'm acting young!
:''[The doll gets caught in the spokes of the bicycle. Grampa Simpson flies off screaming past a blur of colors until he lands in an open grave at a cemetery. Two grave diggers having lunch turn around to see what the commotion is, then resume eating]''
:'''Grampa Simpson''': ''[from inside the grave]'' Hey, this ain't so bad.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lisa pressures Stacy Lovell about Malibu Stacy.]
:'''Stacy''': I see exactly what you mean; this is a problem. But what do you expect me to do?
:'''Lisa''': Change what she says. It's your company.
:'''Stacy''': Not since I was forced out in 1974. They said my way of thinking just wasn't cost effective.
:'''Lisa''': ''[gasps]'' That's awful.
:'''Stacy''': Well, that and I was funneling profits to the Viet Cong.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Smithers turns on his computer, its boot screen displays a computerized version of Mr. Burns]''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Hello, Smithers. You're. Quite. Good. At. Turning. Me. On.
:'''Smithers''': Uh, you probably should ignore that.

===''[[w:Deep Space Homer|Deep Space Homer]]''===
:'''[[w:Montgomery Burns|Burns]]''': Compadres, it is imperative that we crush the freedom fighters before the start of the rainy season! And remember: a shiny new donkey for whoever brings me the head of Colonel Montoya. ''[Smithers whispers to him]'' Hmm?... What?... Oh, and by that I mean, of course, it's time for the &quot;Worker of the Week Award&quot;.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Stillwater''': People, we're in danger of losing our funding.  America isn't interested in space exploration anymore.
:'''Babcock''': Maybe we should finally tell them the big secret, that all the [[w:Chimpanzee|chimps]] we sent into space came back super intelligent.
:''[A chair swivels around, revealing a chimp in a suit, wearing glasses, and smoking a pipe.]''
:'''Chimp''': ''[English accent]'' No, I don't think we'll be telling them that.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Reporter''': Uh, question for the barbecue chef: Don't you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into space?
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': I'll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible [[Planet of the Apes (1968 film)|Planet of the Apes]]. ''[thinks for a moment]'' Wait a minute... [[w:Statue of Liberty|Statue of Liberty]]... THAT WAS [[Earth|''OUR'' PLANET]]! '''YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP!''' DAMN YOU! '''DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!'''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''NASA Technician''': ''[counting down to launch]'' Three... Two... One... MAKE ROCKET GO NOW!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent''': We're just about to get our first pictures from inside the spacecraft with &quot;average-naut&quot; Homer Simpson, and we'd like to...
:''[an ant floats past the screen]''
:'''Kent''': Ahhhh!
:'''Simpsons family''': AHHHHHHHH!
:''[the picture breaks up]''
:'''Kent''': Folks, we just lost the picture, but...what we've seen...speaks for itself.  The spacecraft has apparently been taken over – &quot;conquered&quot; if you will – by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive earth men or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain. There is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I for one welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I could be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': It begins!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer has sent potato chips loose in zero gravity]''
:'''[[Buzz Aldrin]]''': Careful, they're ruffled!

===''[[w:Homer Loves Flanders|Homer Loves Flanders]]''===
:''[Ned has just offered Homer tickets to the game]''
:'''Homer''': Why do you mock me, Lord?
:'''Marge''': Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle Bart threw up there
:''[Marge knocks it down]''
:'''Homer''': I know I shouldn't eat thee but... ''[does it anyway]'' Mmmm, sacralicious.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lenny and Carl see Homer and Ned drive by, but Homer buries Ned's head out of view so they don't see him with Flanders]''
:'''Homer''': Hi!
:'''Lenny''': Hey, look! Homer's got one of those robot cars!
:''[The car crashes off-screen due to Homer pushing Ned's head down]''
:'''Carl''': One of those ''American'' robot cars.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Mr. Burns talking to football players before the game]''
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital who wants you to win this game. I know because... I crippled him myself to inspire you.
:''[Cuts to Milhouse lying in a hospital bed with a broken leg and his parents at his side.]''
:'''[[w:Milhouse Van Houten|Milhouse]]''': I hope they win or Mr. Burns said he's coming back.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mayor Quimby''': I'll take two dogs, two sodas... and, uh, two ice cream bars. ''[as they are passed along the row towards him, Homer snatches two bites from his dogs]'' What the hell happened to my dogs? I want answers.
:'''Homer''': Well, I guess I should pay my share.
:'''Ned''': ''[chuckling]'' Relax, Homer. I keep telling you. You're my guest.
:'''Homer''': Ooh, you brought me a nacho hat! Thanks, Ned. ''[dips a nacho in it, then eats it, singing]'' Nacho, nacho man, I want to be a nacho man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(after seeing a news report for Springfield's upcoming football game)''
:'''Bart''' ''(waves two pieces of paper in front of Homer's face)'': Hey, Dad, sell you these for fifty bucks.
:'''Homer''': Woo hoo! Sold! ''(Bart takes the money and runs off)''
:'''Marge''': Those aren't tickets to the game, Homer.
:'''Homer''': What do you mean? It says right here: &quot;Free wig with every purchase of large wig. Downtown Wig Center&quot;. ''(screams)'': Why you little -- (immediately calms down as he sits down and thinks it over) Hmm, free wig.
:''(Homer imagines himself with Marge's hair, as he looks at himself in the mirror)''
:'''Homer''' ''(imitating Marge)'': I love you, Homie. Mmm. ''(normal voice)'': Heh, heh, heh. I don't need her at all anymore.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lovejoy''': Now let us bow our heads in a silent prayer of Thanksgiving. ''[all the churchgoers do so. Homer is breathing through his nose, which gets louder with each breath, annoying Ned]''
:'''Ned''': ''[furiously and annoyed]'' '''STOP IT!!! BREATHE THROUGH YOUR ''DAMN'' MOUTH!''' ''[Lovejoy and the churchgoers gasp]'' Oh, can't you see this man's not a hero!? He's annoying! He's very, very annoying!
:'''Helen''': Well, Ned's just jealous!
:'''Moe''': The man's hepped up on goofballs!
:'''Abe''': Let's sacrifice him to our ''God!'' ''(the room falls silent as everyone looks at Grampa in horror)'': We did it all the time in the 30's.

===''[[w:Bart Gets an Elephant|Bart Gets an Elephant]]''===
:''[Homer, Bart, and Lisa discuss their plans after breakfast.]''
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': After breakfast, me and Milhouse are going down to the ravine. We got a tip from a five-year-old that there's a dead Martian down there.
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': And I'm going to jam with the Little White Girls Blues Quartet. ''[to Homer]:'' Wanna come with me, Daddy-o?
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Sorry, honey. I'd love to, but Daddy has to go to a beer-drinking contest.
:'''Bart''': Think you'll win?
:'''Homer''': Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose; it's how drunk you get.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': What's the point of all this cleaning?! Are we so vain?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Moe''': Hey Clinton, get back to work!
:'''[[Bill Clinton]]''': Make me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grampa''': Hey, they're playing the elephant song!
:'''Jasper''': I love that. Reminds me of elephants.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': So isn't that what we're all asking in our own lives – &quot;Where's my elephant?&quot; I know that's what I've been asking.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[rides on Stampy]'' Ha-ha! Smithers, this reminds me of that fat man I used to ride to work!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Look at this, Marge: $58 and all of it profit! I'm the smartest businessman in the world.
:'''Marge''': Stampy's food bill today was $300.
:'''Homer''': ''[scared]'' Marge, please, don't humiliate me in front of the money.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Mr. Blackheart?
:'''Mr. Blackheart''': Yes, my pretty?
:'''Lisa''': Are you an ivory dealer?
:'''Mr. Blackheart''': ''[chuckles]'' Little girl, I've had lots of jobs in my day: Whale hunter, seal clubber, president of the Fox network ... and like most people, yeah, I've dealt a little ivory.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ned Flanders''': Look! It's the four elephants of the Apocalypse!
:'''Maude''': That's &quot;Horsemen,&quot; Ned.
:'''Ned''': Well, getting closer. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': He took Bart too?! ''[yells out the window]'' THAT WASN'T PART OF OUR DEAL BLACKHEART! THAT. WASN'T. PAAAAART!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[At Springfield Police Station]''
:'''Chief Wiggum''': ''[sarcastically]'' Yeah, right, lady: an elephant ran through your front yard. OK. [goes to another line] Wiggum...yeah, right, mister, mm hm. An elephant just knocked over your mailbox. OK. [goes to another line] Wiggum...Yeah, right, buddy, liquor store robbery, officer down. Sure...and I'm Edward G. Robinson!

===''[[w:Burns' Heir|Burns' Heir]]''===
:'''Smithers''': I got a mink chamois, sir. I hope it-- ''[gasp]'' Oh, my God, Mr. Burns is dead! Aw! Why do the good always die so young?
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[emerges, strangles Smithers]'' You almost killed me!
:'''Smithers''': Please, sir... ''[places towel on Burns' shoulders]'' you'll catch..cold.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Milhouse''': I have nothing to offer you but my love.
:'''Mr. Burns''': I specifically said ''no geeks''!
:'''Milhouse''': ''[dejected]'' But my mom says I'm cool...
:'''Mr. Burns''': Next!
:'''Nelson Muntz''': Give me your fortune or I'll pound your withered old face in!
:'''Mr. Burns''': Ooh, I like his energy. Put him on the callback list.
:'''Martin Prince''': ''[Singing]'' ''[[w:The Trolley Song|Clang, clang, clang went the trolley! Ring, ring, ring went the bell! Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings]]--''
:''[Nelson runs onto the stage and cold cocks him. Martin collapses.]'' 
:'''Mr. Burns''': Thank you. Give the bully an extra point.
:'''Lisa''': ''[clears throat]'' I propose to you that your heir not need be a boy. In this [[wikt:phallocentric|phallocentric]] society of ours -
:'''Mr Burns''': I don't know what 'phallocentric' means, but ''no girls''!
:'''Milhouse''': ''[offstage, in a dress and wig]'' So much for Plan B.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[a stone suddenly crashes through Burns' library glass window, landing at his feet]''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Oh, look. A bird has become petrified and lost its sense of direction.
:'''Smithers''': I think it is a rock, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': We'll see what the lab has to say about that.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[''Bart smashes up Burns' residence in anger for not being chosen as the heir, smashing windows and decapitating statues'']
:'''Mr. Burns''': Heh heh, look, Smithers -- a creature of pure malevolence. He's the perfect one to suckle at my proverbial teat. ''[opens window]'' [[A Christmas Carol|You there, boy!  What day is this?]]
:'''Boy''': ''[with an exaggerated [[w:Cockney accent|Cockney accent]]]'' Today, sir? Why, it's Christmas Day!
:'''Mr. Burns''': I was talking to ''him''. [''points at Bart''] You!  What day is this?
:'''Bart''': Huh?
:'''Mr. Burns''': I'll tell you what day this is: today is the day you become my heir!
:[''Bart throws a rock which hits Smithers in the head'']
:'''Mr. Burns''': Ooh, I like him a lot.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Simpsons family are eating dinner, Bart throws peas at Lisa]''
:'''Lisa''': Hey! Mom, Bart's throwing peas! 
:'''Marge''': Bart, don't throw peas at your sister.
:'''Bart''': Mr. Burns throws peas at Smithers. ''[throws another peas at Lisa]''
:'''Lisa''': Ow! That was a big one!
:'''Marge''': Homer, say something.
:'''Homer''': Okay. Lisa, quit getting in the way of your wealthy brother's peas.
:'''Marge''': ''[groans]''
:'''Bart''': Oh, yuck. Meat loaf. My most hated of all loafs. ''[feeds his piece to SHL]''
:'''Homer''': ''[gasps]'' That was the end piece! ''[turns red in anger]'' That's it! Being abusive to your family is one thing but I will not stand idly by and watch you feed a hungry dog! ''[point upwards]'' Go to your room!  
:'''Bart''': No! This family stinks! Mr. Burns nurtures my destructive side. I'm suffocating here.
:'''Homer''': Bart, you listen!  
:'''Bart''': Oh, go eat some flowers! ''[tosses flowers at Homer]''
:'''Homer''': My secret shame.
:''[Bart storms out of his house, riding his bicycle]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Deprogrammer''': Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, your son has clearly been brainwashed by the evil and charismatic Mr. Burns.
:'''Marge''': Are you sure you can get him back for us?
:'''Deprogrammer''': Absolutely. I'm the one who successfully deprogrammed [[Jane Fonda]], you know.
:'''Marge''': What about [[w:Peter Fonda|Peter Fonda]]?
:'''Deprogrammer''': Oh, that was a heartbreaker. But I did get [[Paul McCartney]] out of [[w:Wings (band)|Wings]].
:'''Homer''': You idiot! He was the most talented one!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart turns on his model train and it leaves the room]''
:'''Milhouse''': Where does it go?
:'''Bart''': I don't know, but it won't be back for three hours. One time it had snow on it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': People, that was all wrong! Homer Simpson doesn't say &quot;Boh&quot;, he says... [''Flips through a script to he gets to a page.''] Doh!
:''[The fake Homer and Marge take off their masks.]''
:'''British Fake Homer''': Sorry, M.B., but I'm having trouble with this character. Is he supposed to have some kind of neurological impairment like Rain Man or Awakenings. I mean, what the hell am I doing here?
:'''Fake Marge''': And this dialogue has none of the wit and sparkle of [[w:Murphy Brown|Murphy Brown]].
:'''Fake Lisa''': [''Takes off his mask and smokes his cigar''] Hey, you know we are getting into Golden Time.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Yes well just get it right, or you'll be back doing [[w:Come Blow Your Horn|Come Blow Your Horn]] at the Westport Dinner Theatre.

===''[[w:Sweet Seymour Skinner's Badasssss Song|Sweet Seymour Skinner's Badasssss Song]]''===
:'''[[w:Springfield Elementary School#Superintendent Chalmers|Superintendent Chalmers]]''': Seymour? You're fired!
:'''[[w:Seymour Skinner|Principal Skinner]]''': I'm sorry, di-did you just call me a liar?
:'''Superintendent Chalmers''': No, I said you were fired.
:'''Principal Skinner''': Oh. That's much worse.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Come on, Chalmie, you fired Skinner for less than this.
:'''Superintendent Chalmers''': Yeah, I did, but... Skinner really bugged me. Besides, the way America's public schools are sliding, they'll all be this way in a few months. I say, lay back and enjoy it, it's a hell of a toboggan ride.
:'''[[w:Ned Flanders|Ned]]''': ''[over PA]'' Well, cockly-doodly-doo, little buddies. Let's thank the Lord for another beautiful school day.
:'''Superintendent Chalmers''': Thank the Lor-- thank the Lord? That sounded like a prayer. A prayer. A prayer in a public school! God has no place within these walls, just like facts have no place within organized religion. Simpson, you get your wish. Flanders is history!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Principal Skinner''': Now I... I finally have time to do what I've always wanted: write the [[w:Great American Novel|Great American Novel]]. Mine is about [[w:Jurassic Park|a futuristic amusement park where dinosaurs are brought to life through advanced cloning techniques]]. I call it &quot;Billy and the Cloneasaurus.&quot;
:'''Apu''': Oh, you have got to be ''kidding'', sir. First you think of an idea that has already been done. And then you give it a title that nobody could ''possibly'' like! Didn't you think this through?...''[fade to later]''... was on the bestseller list for ''eighteen months!'' Every magazine cover had it...''[fade to later]''...most popular movies of all ''time'', sir! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!?! ''[Skinner hangs his head in shame as Apu calms down]'' ...I mean, thank you, come again.

===''[[w:The Boy Who Knew Too Much|The Boy Who Knew Too Much]]''===
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Wow, that is the biggest Rice Krispie square I've ever seen! The rich sure know how to live.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': ''[lowers a table out of the hotel window; then drops it]'' Got it, Barn?
:'''[[w:Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': ''[offscreen, below hotel]'' Got what? ''[table drops on his head]'' Ow!
:'''[[w:Seymour Skinner|Principal Skinner]]''': You're stealing a table?
:'''Homer''': I'm not stealing it. Hotels expect you to take a few things. It's a souvenir!
:'''Principal Skinner''': Ah... Is that my necktie you're wearing?
:'''Homer''': Souvenir.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Scott Christian''': Let's go over to the county courthouse live to Kent Brockman.
:'''Kent Brockman''': —ockman, just outside the county courtroom where an argument about chowder has spilled over into the biggest trial in Springfield history. Behind these doors, a federal judge will ladle out steaming bowls of rich, creamy justice in a case the media have dubbed &quot;Beat-Up Waiter&quot;. ''[pfft]'' This reporter suggested &quot;[[Watergate scandal|Waitergate]]&quot;, but was shouted down at the press club. Now, it's illegal to televise court proceedings in this state, ''[whispers]'' so we'll have to be quiet. ''[courtroom doors close in his face]'' Dooh—!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Mom, what if there's a really bad, crummy guy who's going to jail, but I know he's innocent?
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': Well, Bart, your Uncle Arthur used to have a saying: &quot;Shoot 'em all and let God sort them out.&quot; Unfortunately, one day he put his theory into practice. It took 75 Federal Marshals to bring him down. Now let's never speak of this again. ''[she then starts humming and dusting the TV]''
:'''Bart''': Mom, what if I can get this guy off the hook? Should I do it?
:'''Marge''': Honey, you should listen to your heart... and not the voices in your head, like a certain uncle did one gray December morn.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Oh, my God... Someone's taken a bite out of the big Rice Krispie square! ...Oh, yeah, and the waiter's been brutally beaten, heh-heh.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[reads the verdict paper]'' What does &quot;[[wiktionary:sequestered|sequestered]]&quot; mean?
:'''Skinner''': It means if we're deadlocked we'll be put up somewhere until we reach a decision.
:'''Homer''': What does &quot;[[wiktionary:deadlocked|deadlocked]]&quot; mean?
:'''Skinner''': It means the jury cannot reach a unanimous decision.
:'''Homer''': Uh-huh. And &quot;[[wiktionary:if|if]]&quot;?
:'''Skinner''': Conjunction meaning &quot;in the event that&quot; or &quot;on condition that&quot;.
:'''Homer''': So IF we cannot reach a decision, the jury will be DEADLOCKED, and then we'll be SEQUESTERED in the Springfield Palace Hotel.
:'''Patty''': That's not going to happen, Homer.
:'''Jasper''': Let's vote. My liver is failing.
:'''Homer''': Where we'll get free rooms, free food, free TV, free {{w|HBO}}, OOOH! [[Free Willy|FREE WILLY]]! ''[Skinner snatches paper from him]''
:'''Skinner''': Justice is not a frivolous thing, Simpson. It has little, if anything, to do with a disobedient whale. Now let's vote!
:'''Homer''': What are all of you voting?
:'''Everyone''': Guilty.
:'''Homer''': Uh-huh. How many S's in innocent?
:''[everyone else groans]''
:'''Homer''': Now I'm only doing what I think is right. I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart sees Skinner in the jury; Skinner thinks his thoughts to him]''
:'''Principal Skinner''': I know you can read my thoughts, Bart. Just a little reminder: If I find out you cut class, your ass is mine. Yeah, you heard me. I think words I would never say. ''[camera pans left to Homer]''
:'''Homer''': I know you can read ''my'' thoughts, boy. ''[sings {{w|Meow Mix}} jingle]'' ''Meow-meow-meow-meow, meow-meow-meow-meow, meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow.''

===''[[w:Lady Bouvier's Lover|Lady Bouvier's Lover]]''===
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': Homer, you didn't do a very good job frosting Maggie's birthday cake.
:''[The cake reads, &quot;Happy Birthday Magaggie&quot;.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': What? It's not Magaggie's birthday?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': If he marries your mother, Marge, we'll be brother and sister! And then our kids... they'll be horrible freaks with pink skin, no overbites, and five fingers on each hand!
:''[Homer imagines his children as more realistic-looking humans, screams and runs from the room]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mrs. Bouvier''': Oh, Monty, I swear you're the devil himself.
:'''Mr. Burns''': I...Who told you?! ...Oh, ah, yes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': I specifically requested ''no'' romantic music! What…?
:'''Abraham Simpson''': ''[stops playing organ, trying to pounds the window]'' Mrs. Bouvier! Mrs. Bouvier! ''[Glass breaks, he falls to the church floor, saved Jacqueline]'' Mrs. Bouvier!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines as Grampa gets back together with Mrs. Bouvier in a bus]''
:'''Simon &amp; Garfunkel''': ''[voices only]'' ♪ ''Hello Grampa, my old friend'' ♪
:♪ ''Your busy day is at an end'' ♪ ''[the executive producers' names appear in darkness]''
:♪ ''Your exploits have been sad and boring'' ♪ ''[the credits begin playing]''
:♪ ''They tell a tale, that's worth ignoring'' ♪
:♪ ''When you're alone, the words of your story will echo down the rest home hall'' ♪
:♪ ''Cuz no one at all'' ♪
:♪ ''Can stand the sound of Grampa'' ♪
:'''Abraham Simpson''': ''[voice only, in credits]'' I first took a fancy to Mrs. Bouvier because her raspy voice reminded me of my old Victrola. Oh, it was a fine machine with a vulcanized rubber listening tube which you crammed in your ear! The tube would go in easy with some sort of lubricant like linseed oil or Dr. Shumway's... ''[the Gracie Films logo appears]'' Oops. I'm sorry!

===''[[w:Secrets of a Successful Marriage|Secrets of a Successful Marriage]]''===
:''[Homer and Marge are discussing ways for Homer to better himself.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Oh... and how is &quot;''education''&quot; supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home wine-making course and I forgot how to drive?
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': That's because you were drunk!
:'''Homer''': And how.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': So, little Lisa, apple of my eye: how are things down at the old schoolhouse?
:'''Lisa''': I find this demeaning and embarrassing beyond my worst nightmares.
:'''Homer''': ''[hearty laughter]'' And how's my little major-leaguer?  Catch any junebugs today?
:'''Bart''': Oh, me and Milhouse took some mail from the mail truck and threw it down the sewer.
:'''Homer''': ''[with barely-concealed anger]'': Son, I know you meant well, but that wasn't the right thing to do.
:'''Bart''': What the hell are you talking about?  You're the one who double-dared us.
:'''Homer''': ''[explodes with anger]'': Why you little -- ''[strangles Bart]''
:'''Marge''': Homer!
:'''Bart''': I'm outta here!
:'''Lisa''': Me too. 
:''[Bart and Lisa leave]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[as Marge kicks out Homer's class -- and Homer]''
:'''Homer''': All right, we're breaking early tonight, class. For tomorrow, you should read pages seven to 18 in Lisa's diary.
:'''Marge''': You too.
:'''Homer''': Huh?
:'''Marge''': Get out!
:'''Homer''': But I'm not in a cla-
:''[Marge angrily pushes Homer onto the ground and slams the door, Otto puts his hand on Homer's shoulder]''
:'''Otto''': Uh, is any of this gonna be on the test? 'Cause I wasn't payin' attention.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[after Marge kicks him out of his house]'' Oh. Fine. If that's what you want, you've got it. ''[walks away from his house]'' This scene is gettin' old, man. I'm hittin' the road. Maybe I'll drop you a line someday from wherever I wind up in this crazy old world. ''[walks into the streets]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Oh, good. Reverend Lovejoy will make Marge take me back. He ''has'' to push the sanctity of marriage, or his god will punish him!
:''[Immediate cut to Reverend and Mrs. Lovejoy talking with Marge in the living room.]''
:'''[[w:Reverend Timothy Lovejoy|Reverend Lovejoy]]''': ''[flatly]'' Get a divorce.
:'''[[w:List of recurring characters in The Simpsons#Helen Lovejoy|Helen Lovejoy]]''': Mmm-hmm.
:'''Marge''': But isn't that a sin?
:'''Reverend Lovejoy''': Marge, just about everything is a sin. You ever sat down and read [[The Bible|this thing]]? Technically, we're not allowed to go to the bathroom.

{{DEFAULTSORT:Simpsons, Season 05}}
[[Category:The Simpsons seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>o7fd8dhug6wml7lwt4xyoh08fj9dx5o</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965151</id>
      <parentid>3965150</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:08:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-24978-79</username>
        <id>3313403</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy */</comment>
      <origin>3965151</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="68953" sha1="go7mxs79pb1tr9bz94t6iyretxoz8rx" xml:space="preserve">{{DISPLAYTITLE:''The Simpsons''/Season 5}}
{{The Simpsons header}}
'''''[[w:The Simpsons|The Simpsons]]''''' (1989–present) is an American adult animated sitcom broadcast by the Fox Broadcasting Company created by [[Matt Groening]]. The series is a satirical depiction of American life, epitomized by the Simpson family.

===''[[w:Homer's Barbershop Quartet|Homer's Barbershop Quartet]]''===
:'''Bart''': Dad, when did you record an album?
:'''Homer''': I'm surprised you don't remember, son. It was only 8 years ago.
:'''Bart''': Dad, thanks to television I can't remember what happened 8 minutes ago.
:''[all Simpsons but Bart start laughing]''
:'''Bart''': No really, I can't, it's a serious problem!
:''[everyone laughs again, and Bart finally relents and laughs too]''
:'''Bart''': What're we all laughing about?
:'''Homer''': Who cares?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': David Crosby? You're my hero!
:'''[[David Crosby]]''': Oh, you like my music?
:'''Barney''': You're a musician?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After the Grammy Awards...]''
:'''Homer''': ''Then came to the greatest thrill of my life.''
:'''[[George Harrison]]''': Hello, Homer, I'm George Harrison.
:'''Homer''': Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Where did you get that brownie?
:'''Harrison''': Over there. There's a big pile of 'em.
:'''Homer''': ''[walks over to the brownies and wolfs down a whole bunch]'' Oh, man.
:'''Harrison''': ''[completely sincere]'' Well, what a nice fellow.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Be Sharps are going through hard times.]''
:'''Homer, Skinner, and Apu''': ''[singing tiredly]'' ''For all the latest medical poop''
:''Call Surgeon General [[C. Everett Koop]]''
:''Koop Koop-a-doop''
:'''[[w:Apu Nahasapeemapetilon|Apu]]''': ''[to Homer]'' This is worse than your song about [[Mr. T]].
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': I pity the fool who doesn't like... he. And where's Barney?
:'''Principal Skinner''': Oh, he's with [[Yoko Ono|his new girlfriend, the Japanese conceptual artist]].
:''[Barney and his girlfriend walk in, and Barney inserts a demo tape into a recorder]''
:'''Barney''': Barbershop is in danger of growing stale. I'm taking it to strange new places.
:''[On the recorder]''
:'''Barney's Girlfriend''': [[w:Revolution 9|Number eight... ''[Barney belches]'' Number eight... ''[Barney belches]'' Number eight... ''[Barney belches]'']]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[during the closing credits]'' I'd like to thank you on behalf of the group, and I hope we passed the audition. ''[Everyone laughs, including Barney. After the laughter dies down]''
:'''Barney''': I don't get it.

===''[[w:Cape Feare|Cape Feare]]''===

:''[after seeing an episode of ''Up Late with McBain'', where Rainier Wolfcastle gets booed for his homophobic joke about Scoey's outfit]''
:'''Bart''' ''[disgusted]'': This is ''horrible''!
:'''Lisa''' ''[disappointed, but not surprised]'': The FOX network has sunk to a new low.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa and Bart''': AAAH! SIDESHOW BOB!
:'''Bart''': ''You'' wrote me those letters!
:'''Marge''': You awful man! Stay away from my son!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': ''[menacing]'' Oh, I'll stay away from your son, all right! Stay away... FOREVER!
:'''Homer''': Oh no!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': Wait a minute. That's no good. ''[walks away, then runs back]'' Wait, I've got a good one now! Marge, say &quot;stay away from my son&quot; again.
:'''Marge''': No!
:''[Sideshow Bob grumbles and walks away]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Blue-Haired Lawyer|Blue-Haired Lawyer]]''': But what about that tattoo on your chest?  Doesn't it say, &quot;Die Bart, Die?&quot;
:'''Sideshow Bob''': No, that's German for &quot;The Bart, The.&quot;
:'''Juror''': No one who speaks German could be an evil man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Now Sideshow Bob can't get in without me knowing. And once a man is in your home, anything you do to him is nice and ''[winks]'' legal.
:'''Homer''': Is that so? ''[yells out kitchen window]'' Oh, Flanders? Won't you join me in my kitchen? ''[Ned turns off the hose. Homer stands on the wall next to the kitchen arch, preparing to strike Flanders]'' Heh-heh-heh-heh...
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Uh, it doesn't work when you invite 'em.
:'''Ned''': Hidilly-hey!
:'''Homer''': Go home.
:'''Ned''': Toodledy-do!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer has hired a detective to take care of Sideshow Bob]''
:'''Detective''': Now, don't you fret. When I'm through, he won't set foot in this town again. I can be very, ''very'' persuasive. ''[Holsters a gun]''
:''[Detective is at a bar with Sideshow Bob]''
:'''Detective''': ''[whining]'' C'mon, leave town!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': No.
:'''Detective''': I'll be your friend!
:'''Sideshow Bob''': No.
:'''Detective''': Oh, you're mean!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the Simpsons are being placed in the Federal Witness Protection Program]''
:'''FBI Agent #1''': Tell you what, sir, from now on, you'll be Homer Thompson at Terror Lake. Let's just practice a bit, hmm? When I say &quot;hello, Mr. Thompson&quot;, you'll say &quot;hi&quot;.
:'''Homer''': Check!
:'''FBI Agent #1''': Hello, Mr. Thompson. ''[Homer doesn't respond and stares blankly]'' Remember now, your name is Homer Thompson.
:'''Homer''': I gotcha.
:'''FBI Agent #1''': Hello, Mr. Thompson.
:''[again Homer doesn’t respond and stares blankly. The FBI agents exchange looks]''
:''[hours pass by]''
:'''FBI Agent #1''': ''[frustrated]'' Argh... Now when I say &quot;hello, Mr. Thompson&quot; and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.
:'''Homer''': No problem.
:'''FBI Agent #1''': ''[stepping hard on Homer's foot]'' Hello, Mr. Thompson.
:'''Homer''': ''[still doesn't respond and stares blankly again for a few seconds, then whispers to the other FBI agent]'' I think he's talking to you.
:''[the FBI agent facepalms]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer busts into Bart's room at night with glowing eyes and a knife]''
:'''Homer''': '''BART DO YOU WANT SOME BROWNIES BEFORE YOU GO TO BED?!'''
:''[Bart screams]''
:''[Homer switches back to normal, holding a brownie tray]''
:'''Homer''': Let me cut you a brownie while they're still hot!
:'''Bart''': Dad, I'm kind of edgy right now. I'd appreciate you not coming in my room screaming and brandishing a butcher's knife!
:'''Homer''': Why? ''[looks at the knife in his hand]'' Oh, right! The Sideshow Bob thing! I'm sorry, boy.
:''[Homer puts the knife down, kisses Bart gently on the forehead, and walks out of the room. Bart turns over to go to sleep and Homer busts back in.]''
:'''Homer''': '''BART YOU WANNA SEE MY NEW CHAINSAW AND HOCKEY MASK?!''' ''[stands over Bart revving the chainsaw]''
:''[Bart screams louder]''
:''[Homer returns to normal]''
:'''Homer''': Oh, sorry! What ''am'' I thinking?
:''[Homer kisses Bart on the forehead and walks out of the room]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Hold it right there, Sideshow Bob. You're under arrest.
:'''Sideshow Bob''': ''[furious]'' '''''By Lucifer's beard!'''''
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Uh, yeah. It's a good thing you drifted by this brothel.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

:'''Bart''': Take 'im away, boys.
:'''Wiggum''': Hey, I'm the chief here! Bake 'im away, toys.
:'''Lou''': What'd you say, chief?
:'''Wiggum''': Do what the kid says.

===''[[w:Homer Goes to College|Homer Goes to College]]''===
:'''Female Intercom''': [''as the dog pulls the level to stop a meltdown''] Meltdown averted. Good boy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer is sitting in a nuclear inspection van]''
:'''Male NRC agent''': Homer, this is an exact replica of your work station. 
:'''Homer''': Hm?
:'''Male NRC agent''': Now, we're going to simulate a power surge in core sector eight.
:'''Homer''': What the hell are you talking about? 
:''[The agents slam the door of the van shut, and slide open a peephole to watch Homer]''
:'''Homer''': ''[blubbering]'' What do I do? What do I do? In the name of God, you've gotta tell me!
:'''Male NRC agent''': Relax! It's just a simulator. Nothing can go wrong.
:'''Homer''': ''[to himself]'' Just poke blindly at the controls until they let you go.
:''[Homer shields his eyes and pushes random buttons, inexplicably causing a meltdown]''
:'''Male NRC agent''': No, no! This... can't be happening!
:''[Smithers and Mr. Burns run to an escape pod. Burns seals the door; Smithers desperately pounds on it]''
:'''Smithers''': For the love of God, sir, there are two seats!
:'''Mr Burns''': ''[reopens the door]'' I like to put my feet up.
:''[Homer emerges from the crater, glowing a radioactive green.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Raargh! Must... destroy... mankind! ''[his watch beeps]'' Ooh, lunchtime. ''[Homer shakes off the radiation and walks off]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Male NRC agent''': I'm still not sure how he caused the meltdown.  There wasn't any nuclear material in the truck!
:'''Mr. Burns''': Oh, very well, it's time for your bribe. Now, you can either have the washer and dryer where the lovely Smithers is standing, or you can trade it all in for what's in this box.
:'''Male NRC agent''': The box, the box!
:'''Female NRC agent''': Look, Burns, this is a big problem. You can't just throw money at it and make it go away.
:''[Mayor Quimby appears, wearing a fur coat that still has the $5,000 price tag attached to it.]''
:'''[[w:Joe Quimby|Mayor Quimby]]''': Gentlemen, I've decided there will be, uh, no investigation. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go away. ''[departs]''
:'''Male NRC agent''': You're in big trouble, Burns. Homer Simpson's job requires college training in nuclear physics.  Now you get your man up to speed, or we'll be forced to take legal action.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Is that so? Well, I have a feeling you'll be... ''dropping'' the charges.
:''[Burns presses a button on his desk. A trapdoor opens a few feet behind the NRC agents, who stare at it in confusion.]''
:'''Smithers''': The painters moved your desk, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Ah, yes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': You [Homer] must find the Jade Monkey before the next full moon.
:'''Smithers''': Actually sir we found the Jade Monkey; it was in your glove compartment.
:'''Mr. Burns''': And the road maps and ice scraper?
:'''Smithers''': They were in there too sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Excellent, it's all falling into place.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer, Bart and the nerds have captured Sir Oinkcelot]''
:'''Homer''': Look! You pull its tail straight and it curls right back up again! ''[He begins pulling the pig's tail]'' Curly, straight! Curly, straight! Curly, straight! Curly, straight! ''[Sir Oinkcelot starts squealing in agony]''
:'''Doug''': Mr. Simpson, I don't think he likes that.
:'''Homer''': Of course he does! He's a cute little piggy! ''[Continues pulling Sir Oinkcelot's tail]'' Curly, straight! Curly, straight! ''[The pig viciously bites Homer on his hand]'' OW!! ''[turns red with anger]'' WHY YOU LITTLE...! ''[Homer lunges at Sir Oinkcelot, but Bart and the nerds restrain him]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Hello, Dean? You're a stupid-head!
:'''Peterson''': ''[looks out the window]'' Homer, is that you?
:''[Homer screams and flees the payphone]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': YES! Take ''that'', Bitterman!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': [''sees Snake Jailbird''] Hey, that's not the wallet inspector.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Professor''': Good morning, and welcome to Nuclear Physics 101. I see a lot of new faces, but you know the old saying: &quot;Out with the old, in with the ''nucleus''&quot; ''[Every student in the class except Homer bursts out with laughter]'' Now, let's just get started on the- whoops. ''[He drops his lecture notes, this time Homer explodes with laughter]''
:'''Homer''': Oh, did you see that jerk! He dropped his notes! ''[Homer continues laughing obnoxiously loud]''

===''[[w:Rosebud (The Simpsons)|Rosebud]]''===
:'''Smithers''': Who's Bobo, sir?
:'''Mr. Burns''': Bobo? Oh I meant ''Lobo'', uh, ''[[w:The Misadventures of Sheriff Lobo|Sheriff Lobo]]''. They ''never'' should have cancelled that show. What were they thinking?
:'''Smithers''': Oh, I see. On another topic, the preparations for your birthday have begun.
:'''Mr. Burns''': I won't get what I really want.
:'''Smithers''': No one does.
:''[Smithers briefly imagines Burns popping out of a cake naked and wearing only a sash like [[Marilyn Monroe]]]''
:'''Fantasy Mr. Burns''': ''[singing]'' ''[[w:Happy Birthday Mr. President|Happy Birthday, Mr. Smithers...]]''
:'''Smithers''': ''[smiles]'' Mmmm...
:''[At the Simpsons' house, Homer is tossing and turning in his sleep]''
:'''Homer''': Lobo...Lobo... Bring back Sheriff Lobo!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer is doing comedy at Burns' party.]''
:'''Homer''': Are you ready to laugh?
:'''Man in Audience''': Ugh, that poor dog.
:'''Homer''': I said, are you ready to laugh?!
:'''Woman in Audience''': Quiet, you awful man!
:'''Homer''': You know, Mr. Burns is ''so'' cheap--
:'''Mr. Burns''': What?
:'''Homer''': Er, I mean you know, Mr. Burns is so ''old''--
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[pounds the table]'' How ''dare you''!
:'''Homer''': Whoa! Tough crowd. Better bring out the big guns... ''[clears throat]'' Here's an impression of Mr. Burns that you might find, a little &quot;cheeky&quot;.
:''[Homer moons the crowd, revealing a face painted on his buttocks; everyone in the audience gasps]''
:'''Homer''': ''[mockingly]'' I'm Mr. Burns, blah, blah, blah! Do this, do that, blah, blah, blah! I think I'm so big, blah blah ''blaaah!''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Destroy him. ''[one of Burns' security staff whacks Homer over the head with a baton, leaving him unconscious]'' This party is over. ''[the security staff start attacking other party guests at random]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Mr. Burns' party, Homer is nursing the lump on his head he got during his comedy act at Burns' party]''
:'''Homer''': Aw, where did I lose 'em? I'll never wiggle my bare butt in public again.
:'''Lisa''': I'd like to believe that this time. I really would.
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': Bart, run down to the store and get a bag of ice for your father.
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Yes'm. Dad, I know you're discouraged, but please, don't deny the world your fat can.
:'''Homer''': Don't worry, boy. He'll be ready for your Aunt Selma's birthday.
:'''Lisa''': I knew it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Smithers and Mr. Burns are crawling across the ceiling of the Simpson home, using suction cups. They freeze when Homer walks to the refrigerator]''
:'''Homer''': Mmmm... 64 slices of [[w:American cheese|American cheese]]. ''[sits at the table and begins eating one at a time]'' 64...63...''[Time passes to morning]'' 2...1.
:'''Marge''': ''[entering]'' Have you been up all night eating cheese?
:'''Homer''': I think I'm blind.
:''[Smithers and Mr. Burns fall the the floor and get up]''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Good day to you.
:''[They both leave]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney The Dinosaur:''' Two plus two is four... two plus two is four... two plus two is four.
:'''Homer:''' Hehehe. I can see why this is so popular.

===''[[w:Treehouse of Horror IV|Treehouse of Horror IV]]''===
:''[first lines]''
:'''Bart''': ''[walking in front of a set of paintings]'' Paintings: Lifeless images rendered in colorful goop. But at night, they take on a life of their own. They become portals to hell! So scary and horrible...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Devil Ned has give Homer an enchanted doughnut.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Oooh!
:'''[[w:Ned Flanders|Devil Ned]]''': Now, remember, the instant you finish it, I own your soul for...
: ''[Homer has already scarfed the doughnut, except for one small piece.]''
:'''Homer''': Hey, wait. If I don't finish this last bite, you don't get my soul, do you?
:'''Devil Ned''': Well, technically, no, but...
:'''Homer''': ''[sing-song]'' I'm smarter than the Devil! I'm smarter than the Dev--
:''[Devil Ned angrily transforms into a huge, red demon.]''
:'''Devil''': ''[deep voice]'' '''YOU ARE NOT SMARTER THAN ME! I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL YET, HOMER SIMPSON!!'''
:''[He vanishes into the floor. Homer smugly puts the last doughnut piece into his pocket.]''
:'''Homer''': Not likely. He, he, he.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[In Hell Labs Ironic Punishment Division, Homer is strapped to a chair where a blue demon arrives]''
:'''Blue Demon''': So, you like donuts, eh?
:'''Homer''': Uh-huh.
:'''Blue Demon''': Well! Have all the donuts in the world!
:''[He starts laughing as Homer is force fed donuts. 15 minutes later, it's revealed that this torture has backfired as Homer still hasn't had enough.]''
:'''Homer''': More.
:'''Blue Demon''': I don't understand it. [[:w:James Coco|James Coco]] went mad in 15 minutes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Devil Ned''': I give you the Jury of the Damned: [[Benedict Arnold]], [[:w:Lizzie Borden|Lizzie Borden]], [[Richard Nixon]].
:'''[[Richard Nixon]]''': But I’m not dead yet. In fact, I just wrote an article for [[:w:Redbook|Redbook]].
:'''Devil Ned''': Hey, listen, I did a favor for you.
:'''[[Richard Nixon]]''': Yes, master.
:'''Devil Ned''': [[:w:John Wilkes Booth|John Wilkes Booth]], [[:w:Blackbeard|Blackbeard the Pirate]], [[:w:John Dillinger|John Dillinger]]. And the starting line of the [[:w:1976 Philadelphia Flyers–Red Army game|1976 Philadelphia Flyers]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Devil Ned''': Alright Simpson, you get your soul back. But let that ill-gotten doughnut be ''FOREVER ON YOUR HEAD!!!''
:'''Homer''': ''[screams]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': ''[sees a school bus inside the painting]'' The School Bus? Oh, they must mean The Ghoul Bus!
:'''Lisa''': Nope, says right there: ''[points the painting and reads it]'' &quot;School Bus&quot;.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': ''[sees a gremlin on the school bus during a trip and screams]'' Everybody! There's a monster on the side of the bus!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[horrified at the Dogs Playing Poker painting]'' They're dogs, and they're playing poker!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Simpsons arrive at Mr. Burns' castle. Homer rings the doorbell.]
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': ''[via intercom]'' Welcome, come in. ''[sinisterly, still heard on intercom]'' Ah, fresh victims for my ever growing army of the undead.
:'''[[w:Waylon Smithers|Smithers]]''': Sir, you have to let go of the button.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Oh, son of a bi-- ''[door opens]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': BART! How many times have I told you not to bite your sis— Wait a minute! You ARE a vampire!
:'''Grampa''': QUICK!! We have to kill the boy!!
:'''Marge''': How'd you know he's a vampire?
:'''Grampa''': He's a vampire? ''[screams]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marge''': We've got to do something! Today, he's drinking people's blood - tomorrow, he could be smoking!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Simpsons arrive at Mr. Burns's crypt. Homer opens his casket and is ready to stake him.]
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Take that, vile fiend! ''[starts staking Burns repeatedly]''
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': Uh, dad? That's his crotch.
:'''Homer''': Oh.. sorry. ''[puts stake to his heart]'' BAH''!!''
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[screams]''
:''[He quivers then stops and melts into mold]''
:'''Homer''': ''[relieved]'' Aah...
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[comes back to life]'' YOU'RE FIRED!!! ''[melts into mold and dies again]''
:'''Homer''': D'OH!

===''[[w:Marge on the Lam|Marge on the Lam]]''===
:'''Rescue Worker 1''': Homer, this is never easy to say, I'm going have to saw your arms off.
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': They'll grow back, right?
:'''Rescue Worker''': Oh...yeah.
:'''Homer''': Whew.
:''[the rescue worker starts the rotary saw and moves it toward Homer's arm]''
:'''Rescue Worker 2''': Homer, are you just holding on to the can?
:'''Homer''': Your point being?
:''[Homer leaves with everyone laughing at him]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': You're absolutely right, Homer. We don't need a babysitter.
:'''Homer''': ''[suspicious]'' Wait a second... ''[pulls a card from his pocket: &quot;ALWAYS DO OPPOSITE OF WHAT BART SAYS&quot;]'' Hmm...you kids ''do'' need a babysitter.
:'''Bart''': Blast that infernal card! ''[to Homer]'' ''Don't'' give that card to me.
:'''Homer''': Here you g-- ''[pulls back]'' No!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Lionel Hutz''': Mr. Simpson, I was just going through your garbage, when I couldn't help but overhear you are in need of a babysitter. Now, as a highly-skilled attorney, my fee is $175 an hour.
:'''Homer''': We pay $8.00 for the night and you can take two Popsicles out of the freezer.
:'''Lionel Hutz''': Three.
:'''Homer''': Two.
:'''Lionel Hutz''': Okay, two, and I get to keep this old birdcage.
:'''Homer''': Done.
:'''Lionel Hutz''': ''[to himself]'' Still got it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(as Ruth and Marge are taking in the breathtaking view of Springfield)''
:'''Ruth Powers''': Look. You can see our houses.
:'''Marge''': Hmm. There's an awful lot of black smoke coming from my chimney.
:''(cut to the Simpsons living room. Lionel Hutz is throwing piles of his personal effects into the fireplace while Bart and Lisa watch)''
:'''Lisa''': Mr. Hutz, why are you burning all your personal papers?
:'''Lionel Hutz''': As of this moment, Lionel Hutz no longer exists. ''(cheerfully)'': Say hello to Miguel Sanchez!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart and Lisa wake up the next day on the couch]''
:'''Bart''': Hey, it's morning and Mom and Dad aren't home yet.
:'''Lisa''': Don't worry. Mr. Hutz is still here to take care of us.
:''[Lisa budges Lionel Hutz awake. He growls menacingly and brandishes a knife]''
:'''Lionel Hutz''': ''[defensively]'' Don't touch my stuff! ''[realizes that he just scared Bart, Lisa, and Maggie; sheepishly, as he sits on the couch with a confused expression on his face]'' H-Hey, this isn't the YMCA.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(Dragnet-style epilogue of what happened to everyone involved in the episode)''
:'''Narrator''': Ruth Powers was tried in Springfield Superior Court. The judge dismissed her ex-husband's auto theft charges and forced him to pay all back child support. Mr. Powers blamed the outcome on his lawyer, one Lionel Hutz. Lionel Hutz, A.K.A. Miguel Sanchez, A.K.A., Dr. Nguyen van Thuoc, was paid $8 for his 32 hours of babysitting, he was glad to get it. Marge Simpson was charged with the violation of penal code section 618A: Wanton Destruction of Precious Antique Cans. She was ordered to pay 50 cents to replace the cans and $2000 in punitive damage and mental anguish. Homer Simpson was remanded to the custody of the United States Army Neurochemical Research Center at Fort Meade, Maryland, for extensive testing.
:'''Homer''': Woohoo!

===''[[w:Bart's Inner Child|Bart's Inner Child]]''===
:'''Homer''': Oh no you don't! That trampoline is mine! ''[crashes into the other car]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[as the trampoline jumps on him repeatedly onto a cliff]'' If this were a cartoon, the cliff would break off now. ''[dissolves to nighttime]'' I'm thirsty. ''[This causes the cliff to break, and fall off]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Troy McClure|Troy McClure]]''': Hi! I'm Troy McClure!
:'''Brad Goodman''': And I'm Brad Goodman.
:'''[[w:Troy McClure|Troy McClure]]''': You might remember me from such self-help videos as 'Smoke Yourself Thin' and 'Get Confident, Stupid!'
:'''Brad Goodman''': And you know me about such-help videos.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brad Goodman''': I want you all to close your eyes and listen to your inner child. Listen, what's he saying?
:'''Ned's Inner Child''': Stay on the course big Ned, you're doing super! ''[Ned smiles]''
:'''Homer's Inner Child''': ''[points to his mouth]'' Food goes in here.
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': It sure does.
:'''Moe's Inner Child''': ''[in Italian accent]'' Hey-a Moe, what's-tha mattah? Ya no talking wit ya accent-a no more.
:'''[[w:Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': ''[slaps face]'' ''Mamma mia!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': A new mood is in the air in Springfield as refreshing as a moistened towelette. Folks are finally accepting their feelings and freely communicating with no holding back. And this reporter thinks it's about ''[beep]''ing time! Of course all these good feelings can be traced to one feisty little scamp who taught us that if it feels good, do it! ''[squirts whipped cream into his mouth]''
:'''Bart''': Lis, today I am a God.
:'''Lisa''': Is that why you're sitting on an ice cream sandwich?
:'''Bart''': Ewww...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': And I'm really enjoying this so called... iced cream!
:'''Smithers''': Sir, in the spirit of the festival and everything, I'd just like to say that.... I... love you.
:'''Burns''': Hm?
:'''Smithers''': In those colors! ''[to himself]'' Oh, who am I kidding? The boathouse was the time!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Principal Skinner''': Darn! They're very slowly getting away!
:'''Moe''': Looks like they're headed for the old mill!
:'''Principal Skinner''': No they're not.
:'''Moe''': Well, let's go to the old mill anyway! Get some cider!

===''[[w:Boy-Scoutz 'n the Hood|Boy-Scoutz 'n the Hood]]''===
:'''Bart''': Aw man, how are we supposed to kill the rest of the afternoon?
:'''Hobo''': You mustn't kill time boys, you must cherish it, seize the day. Can I have some change to go get me loaded?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Milhouse''': Hey, don't bogart that Squishee! ''[Barney chugs junkie]''
:'''Barney''': I dunno where you magic pixies came from, but I like your pixie drink.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals, except the [[w:weasel|weasel]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Milhouse Van Houten|Milhouse]]''': You're lucky. You only joined the Junior Campers. I got a dirty word shaved into the back of my head.
:''[Skinner walks by and stops when he sees the unseen &quot;dirty word&quot; in the back of Milhouse's head.]''
:'''[[w:Seymour Skinner|Principal Skinner]]''': What is it with you boys and that word? ''[grabs Milhouse]'' I'm going to shave you bald, young man, until you learn that hair is not a right, it's a privilege.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[While looking for a peanut under the couch, Homer pulls out a 20 dollar bill]''
:'''Homer''': Awww, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut.
:'''Homer's Brain''': Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
:'''Homer''': Explain how!
:'''Homer's Brain''': Money can be exchanged for goods and services.
:'''Homer''': Woo-hoo!
:''[Homer starts running to the door, slips on the peanut he was looking for, and drops the money]''
:'''Homer''': D'OH!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Ya see anything yet?
:'''Lou''': Nothing captain, someone took all the beer and cold cuts.
:'''Wiggum''': Oh, that's it. I'm not even casting off until we go to the store.

===''[[w:The Last Temptation of Homer|The Last Temptation of Homer]]''===
:''[first lines]''
:'''Bart''': The beauty of it is, each parking space is a mere one foot narrower indistinguishable to the naked eye but therein lies the game!
:'''Milhouse''': I fear to watch! I cannot turn away!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Charlie is explaining to Mr., Burns about the gas leak]''
:'''Charlie''': Well, sir, I won't bore you with the details of our miraculous escape, but we desperately need a real emergency exit.
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': Why, that's a fabulous idea. Anything else you'd like? How about real lead in the radiation shields? Urinal cakes, maybe? ''[hands Smithers a notebook]'' Smithers, throw this at him. ''[Smithers throws the book at Charlie. Mr. Burns right hand reaches under his desk and presses a button. A tube covers Charlie and sucks him upwards]'' Smithers, where does that tube go?
:'''[[w:Waylon Smithers|Smithers]]''': I'm not sure, sir; it was here when we moved in.
:''[Charlie then finds himself in an unnamed foreign country inhabited by cackling men wearing turbans. He is forced to dance to sitar music.]''
:'''Men''': Dance! Dance! Dance! Dance! ''[Charlie does so. The men start ululating maniacally]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Department of Labor Agent''': This plant violates ''every'' labor law in the book! We found a missing Brazilian soccer team working in your reactor core!
:'''Mr. Burns''': That plane crashed on ''my'' property!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Moe, I need your advice.
:'''[[w:Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': Yeah?
:'''Homer''': You see, I have this friend named Joey Joe Joe...Junior...Shabadoo.
:'''[[w:Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': Homer, that's the worst name I've ever heard. ''[a man in the bar runs out, crying]''
:'''[[w:Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': Hey, Joey Joe Joe!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[seeing the White House with Colonel Klink]'' Marge lives here?
:'''Man''': ''[voice only]'' Madam President, your approval rating is soar. ''[Marge murmurs]''
:'''Colonel Klink''': ''[sing-songy]'' This dream is over! ''[pops, Homer sends back in the phone booth]''
:'''Lionel Hutz''': ''[sees Homer stuck in the phone booth being knocked over]'' Hey, You! Get Out Of My Office!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[An alarm starts blaring at the power plant]''
:'''Smithers''': Someone is charging room service to the company, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Well we'll just see about that! ''[uncovers a cage hold several winged monkeys]'' [[w:The Wizard of Oz|Fly, my pretties! Fly!]] ''[the monkeys leap out of the window, only to plummet to their deaths]'' Oh...''[to Smithers]'' Continue the research.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': ''[to bullies in his normal self]'' Gentlemen, the nerd you knew is dead. Beat me, and you will be beating one of your own.
:'''Kearney''': Whatever! ''[they beat Bart anyway]''

===''[[w:$pringfield (or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)|$pringfield (or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)]]''===
:''[Homer puts on a pair of horn-rimmed glasses he finds floating in a toilet bowl.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': [[The Wizard of Oz|The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.]]
:'''Man in stall''': [[w: Pythagorean theorem|That's a ''right'' triangle]], ya idiot!
:'''Homer''': D'oh!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': Thank you for visiting our plant, Dr. Kissinger.
:'''[[Henry Kissinger]]''': It was fun.
:'''Smithers''': We'll let you know if your glasses turn up.
:'''[[Henry Kissinger]]''': Yes well, I'm sure I left them in the car. ''[thinking]'' No one must know I dropped them in the toilet. Not I, the man who drafted the [[w:Paris Peace Accords|Paris Peace Accords]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Kent Brockman|Kent Brockman]]''': Scott, things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the Unemployment Office, joblessness is no longer just for philosophy majors... now at the risk of sounding unpopular, this reporter places the blame for all of this squarely on you ''[pointing at the camera]'' the viewers!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother. I call him Gamblor; and it's time to free your mother from his neon claws.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Krusty''': I don't wanna get a ''sore'' spot, but can we talk about herpes? Herpes, herpes, bo-berpes, banana fana fo-ferpes! Herpes, OH!! Hey! Y'know [[w:Port-wine stain| that spot]] on [[w:Mikhail Gorbachev|Gorbachev's]] head? Herpes, trust me! Anybody here have herpes? Huh? Huh? You people are the worst audience I've ever seen!
:'''Man in Audience''': Yeah, well you're the worse comedian WE'VE ever seen!
:'''Krusty''': Great! Then we'll just sit here silently for the next 90 minutes!
:'''Man in Audience''': Fine with us! ''[Krusty then sits down on stage in dismay]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Smithers''': I'm afraid Robert Goulet hasn't arrived yet, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Very well, begin the thawing of Jim Nabors.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Smithers''': Excuse me, ma'am, don't you think you've gambled enough?
:'''Marge''': No.
:'''Smithers''': Okay. We're required by law to ask every 75 hours. Get her another free drink.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart brings Robert Goulet to his treehouse casino]''
:'''[[w:Robert Goulet|Robert Goulet]]''': Are you sure this is the place? I think I should call my manager.
:'''Nelson Muntz''': Your manager says for you to shut up!
:'''Goulet''': ''[surprised]'' Vera said that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[grabbing Marge]'' Yer gotta redda kid forrad yarrar!
:'''Marge''': Homer, what is it? Slow down!
:'''Homer''': ''[slowly, but still furious]'' J'yer gedda ferda redderarrar.
:'''Marge''': Think before you say each word.
:'''Homer''': You broke a promise to your child.
:'''Marge''': What?
:'''Homer''': You promised Lisa to help her with her costume. You made her cry. Then I cried. Then Maggie laughed -- she's such a little trooper.

===''[[w:Homer the Vigilante|Homer the Vigilante]]''===
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': ''[horrified]'' The burglar even took my stamp collection!
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': ''[amused]'' ''You'' had a stamp collection?
:''[The family all laugh at Bart, and the phone rings. Bart answers it.]''
:'''[[w:Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': ''[on the phone]'' Stamp collection? Ha-ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Kent Brockman|Kent Brockman]]''': Hordes of panicky people seem to be evacuating the town for some unknown reason. Professor, without knowing precisely what the danger is, would you say it's time for our viewers to crack each other's heads open and feast on the goo inside?
:'''[[w:Professor|Professor]]''': Mmm, yes I would, Kent.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Aw, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. Forty percent of all people know that.

===''[[w:Bart Gets Famous|Bart Gets Famous]]''===
:''[Marge convinces Bart to perform one more time.]''
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': You're right, Mom. I shouldn't let this bother me. I'm in television now. It's my job to be repetitive. My job. My job. Repetitiveness is my job. ''[to Marge]'' I'm gonna go out there and give the best performance of my life!
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': The best performance of your life?
:'''Bart''': The best performance of my life!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': ''[to Bart]'' And now you can go back to just being you, instead of a one-dimensional character with a silly catchphrase.
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': ''[breaking a lamp]'' D'oh!
:'''Bart''': Ay, caramba!
:'''Marge''': ''[groans]''
:'''[[w:Maggie Simpson|Maggie]]''': ''[sucks her pacifier]''
:'''[[w:Ned Flanders|Flanders]]''': Hi-dilly-ho!
:'''[[w:Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': ''[belches]''
:'''[[w:Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': Ha, ha!
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': Excellent.
:''[Long pause. Everyone looks expectantly at Lisa.]
:'''Lisa''': If anyone wants me, I'll be in my room. [She walks away.]
:'''Homer''': What kind of catchphrase is that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': I'm telling you, I do work on the Krusty show. Look at the Credits! [presses &quot;play&quot;]
:'''Krusty''': Bye bye, kids! ''[laughs]'' ''[credits roll, then after a few seconds they are squeezed for a news promo]''
:'''[[w:Kent Brockman|Kent Brockman]]''': I'm Kent Brockman. On the 11:00 news tonight, a certain kind of soft drink has been found to be lethal. We won't tell you which one after sports and the weather with Funny Sonny Storm.
:'''Bart''': ''[Pausing the tape and pointing to his name on the screen]'' There's my name, right here, Bart Simpson.
:'''[[w:Milhouse Van Houten|Milhouse]]''': Looks more like Brad Storch.
:'''[[w:Martin Prince|Martin]]''': No, it says Betty. Betty Symington.
:'''[[Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': ''[Punching Bart in the stomach]'' That's for taking credit for other people's work.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': ''[Reading news script]'' 'Tragic news tonight: a tidal wave in Kuala'... 'la'- la.... 'Pur'... 'Lam-pur'... France.
:''[Bart pops up and steals Kent's Danish.]''
:'''Bart''': Yoink!
:'''Kent Brockman''': Yoink? ''[After finding out his Danish is gone]'' [gasps]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': ''[Shuffling his papers]'' Yeah, I know I'm on. But I don't care. I don't read the news until I get my Danish. Go ahead, try to find a replacement.
:'''Bumbleebee Man''': ''[Pushing Kent off the chair and sitting on it]'' [clearing throat] 'A powerful tidal wave in Kuala Lumpur has killed 120 people.' Ay Chihuahua! Whoa, whoa, whoa! ''[Loses balance and falls over]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Announcer''': And now it's time for &quot;Match Game 2034&quot;, with [[Billy Crystal]]!
:'''Billy''': Hi!
:'''Announcer''': [[Farrah Fawcett|Farah Fawcett-Majors-O'Neal-Varney]]!
:'''Farah''': ''[Grunts]''
:'''Announcer''': The &quot;I didn't do it&quot; boy!
:'''Bart''': ''[Grunts]''
:'''Announcer:''': Ventriloquist [[Loni Anderson]]!
:'''Loni''': ''[sighs]''
:'''Announcer''': [[Spike Lee]]!
:'''Spike''': Mmm.
:'''Announcer''': And the always lovely and vivacious head of Kitty Carlisle!
:'''Kitty''': Hi, everybody: let's start the game!

===''[[w:Homer and Apu|Homer and Apu]]''===
:''[Homer is eating expired meat he bought at the Kwik-E-Mart]''
:'''Homer''' ''[as his stomach grumbles]'': Ooh! Stomach...churning! ''[keeps eating the expired ham. His stomach grumbling gets more intense. Begins to double over]'': Bowels...clenching. Not much time. ''[falls off the couch, off-screen]'': Must finish! ''[eating sounds]''
:''[Cut to an ambulance speeding down the street]''
:''[Establishing shot of Springfield General Hospital. Cut to a sick Homer in a hospital bed with Marge, the kids, and Dr. Hibbert standing over him]''
:'''Dr. Hibbert''': Well, sir, Homer's illness was either caused by ingesting spoiled food or...''[chuckles]'': some sort of voodoo curse.
:''[whip pan to Patty and Selma with a purse]''
:'''Patty''': Hey! We've just been working the eyes. ''[Selma holds up a Homer-shaped voodoo doll with 12 needles (six on each eye) in his eyes]''
:''[some time later]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Your old meat made me sick!
:'''[[w:Apu Nahasapeemapetilon|Apu]]''': Why, I'm so sorry. Please accept five pounds of frozen shrimp. ''[Homer picks up and sniffs a piece of shrimp]''
:'''Homer''': This shrimp isn't frozen – and it smells funny!
:'''Apu''': Okay, ten pounds.
:'''Homer''': Woo-hoo!
:''[Cut to the same ambulance as before speeding down the street]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': Good evening, here's an update on last week's nursing home exposé, &quot;Geezers in Freezers&quot; – it turns out the rest home ''was'' adequately heated; the footage you saw was of a fur-storage facility. We've also been told to apologize for using the term &quot;geezers&quot;. Now, coming up next, &quot;The Case of the Cantankerous Old Geezer.&quot;
:'''Homer''': ''[couch-ridden with salmonella]'' Oh... Urp! Rancid meat attack! Stupid parasites! Is there no way I can find justice?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent''': We've come up with a camera so tiny it fits into this oversized novelty hat. ''[puts hat on Homer, straining on pain]'' Now, go get us some incriminating footage. And remember: you have to get in and out for 10 minutes, or you suffer permanent neck damage.
:'''Man''': ''[neck horribly bent]'' He's not kiddin'.
:''[Homer walks towards the Kwik-E-Mart doors, swaying and weaving. Apu watches him, curious. Kent and others watch through the camera in the surveillance van]''
:'''Apu''': Huh?
:'''Homer''': Don't be alarmed, Apu. Just go about your daily routine like I'm not wearing the hat.
:'''Apu''': Your headgear seems to be emitting a buzzing noise, sir. Perhaps you have a bee in your bonnet.
:'''Homer''': Bee? Agh! Woo! Woo! Agh-agh-agghh! ''[Stomps on the hat and runs out. Homer returns to the van, gasping for air]''
:'''Kent''': Homer, that hat's been with the station for twenty years. He had one day left 'til retirement.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Apu is replenishing the hot dog roller, unaware the camera in the hat is filming him. He drops one on the floor, it rolls towards the hat, and we get a wretched close-up of the wiener]''
:'''Apu''': Oh, it is encrusted with filth. ''[blows it]'' Oh, well, let's sell it anyway. Now this is just between me and you, smashed hat. ''[he winks right into the camera]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Apu, if I've learned anything, it's that life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Apu''': That ''[the Kwik-E-Mart]'' is the sight of my spiritual de-pantsing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer and Apu are flying over the Himalayas]''
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No.
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No.
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No.
:'''Homer''': Are we in India yet?
:'''Apu''': No. Oh wait... [[w:Borders of India|Now we are.]]

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Apu''': He is the benevolent, enlightened president and CEO of Kwik-E-Mart – and in Ohio, Stop-O-Mart. ''[CEO slurps his Squishee]'' He is the one I must ask to get my job back.
:'''CEO''': Approach, my sons.
:''[Homer and Apu approach the CEO's meditation point]''
:'''CEO''': You may ask me three questions.
:'''Apu''': That's great, because I only need one.
:'''Homer''': ''[interrupting]'' Are you really the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?
:'''CEO''': Yes.
:'''Homer''': Really?
:'''CEO''': Yes.
:'''Homer''': You?
:'''CEO''': Yes. I hope this has been enlightening for you.
:'''Apu''': But – I must—
:'''CEO''': Thank you, come again.
:'''Apu''': But—
:'''CEO''': Thank you, come again.
:''[Homer and Apu leave the convenient store]''
:'''Homer''': Well, that was a big bust. Is he ''really'' the head of the Kwik-E-Mart? ''[Apu growls, reaches towards Homer]'' No need to apologize, Apu – it was as much my fault as it was yours. ''[Apu pounces and strangles Homer]'' Okay, Apu ... I accept your apology! ''[both fight, topple off the path and fall down the mountain side]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[James Woods]]''': Apu, you saved my life. And as a small token of my appreciation, I got you your job back at the Kwik-E-Mart.
:'''Apu''': Oh! Oh, Mr. Woods, you're--
:'''Woods''': But as for me, I'm off to battle aliens on a faraway planet.
:'''Marge''': That sounds like a good movie.
:'''Woods''': Yes... yes, a... a movie, yes.

===''[[w:Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy|Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy]]''===
:''[Homer is buttering a muffin that he got out of an E-Z Bake Oven as he's driving]''
:'''Marge''': Mmm, I don't know if that's a good idea to do while you're driving.
:'''Homer''': Marge, that's what I bought it for.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Thanks for buying us these toys, Grampa.
:'''Grampa Simpson''' ''[dismissive]'': Bah! Why didn't you get something useful, like storm windows ''[as Lisa becomes sad]'': or a nice pipe organ? ''[whining]'': I'm thirsty. Ooh, what smells like mustard? ''[The Simpsons continue driving, ignoring Grampa as he continues complaining]'': There sure are a lot of ugly people in your neighborhood. ''[Homer turns the car into the driveway as Grampa points]'': Ooh! Lookit that one! ''[overhead shot of everyone [except Grampa] fleeing the car and running inside the house]'': Oh, my glaucoma just got worse! [[w:Bill Clinton|The President]] is a [[w:Democratic Party (United States)|Demmycrat!]] ''[plaintive]'': Hello? I can't unbuckle my seat belt! Hello! ''[honks car horn, despite being in the backseat and allegedly not being able to unbuckle his seat belt]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Malibu Stacy Doll''': Don't ask me. I'm just a girl! Ha ha, ha ha!
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Right on, say it, sister.
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': It's not funny, Bart. Millions of girls will grow up thinking that this is the right way to act - that they can never be more than vacuous ninnies whose only goal in life is to look pretty, land a rich husband, and spend all day on the phone with their equally vacuous friends talkin' about how damned terrific it is to look pretty and have a rich husband!
:'''Bart''': Just what I was gonna say.
:''[Lisa angrily throws the doll out the living room window. Cut to Grampa Simpson riding a bike down the street]''
:'''Grampa Simpson''': Look at me! I'm acting young!
:''[The doll gets caught in the spokes of the bicycle. Grampa Simpson flies off screaming past a blur of colors until he lands in an open grave at a cemetery. Two grave diggers having lunch turn around to see what the commotion is, then resume eating]''
:'''Grampa Simpson''': ''[from inside the grave]'' Hey, this ain't so bad.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lisa pressures Stacy Lovell about Malibu Stacy.]
:'''Stacy''': I see exactly what you mean; this is a problem. But what do you expect me to do?
:'''Lisa''': Change what she says. It's your company.
:'''Stacy''': Not since I was forced out in 1974. They said my way of thinking just wasn't cost effective.
:'''Lisa''': ''[gasps]'' That's awful.
:'''Stacy''': Well, that and I was funneling profits to the [[w:Viet Cong|Viet Cong]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Smithers turns on his computer, its boot screen displays a computerized version of Mr. Burns]''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Hello, Smithers. You're. Quite. Good. At. Turning. Me. On.
:'''Smithers''': Uh, you probably should ignore that.

===''[[w:Deep Space Homer|Deep Space Homer]]''===
:'''[[w:Montgomery Burns|Burns]]''': Compadres, it is imperative that we crush the freedom fighters before the start of the rainy season! And remember: a shiny new donkey for whoever brings me the head of Colonel Montoya. ''[Smithers whispers to him]'' Hmm?... What?... Oh, and by that I mean, of course, it's time for the &quot;Worker of the Week Award&quot;.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Stillwater''': People, we're in danger of losing our funding.  America isn't interested in space exploration anymore.
:'''Babcock''': Maybe we should finally tell them the big secret, that all the [[w:Chimpanzee|chimps]] we sent into space came back super intelligent.
:''[A chair swivels around, revealing a chimp in a suit, wearing glasses, and smoking a pipe.]''
:'''Chimp''': ''[English accent]'' No, I don't think we'll be telling them that.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Reporter''': Uh, question for the barbecue chef: Don't you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into space?
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': I'll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible [[Planet of the Apes (1968 film)|Planet of the Apes]]. ''[thinks for a moment]'' Wait a minute... [[w:Statue of Liberty|Statue of Liberty]]... THAT WAS [[Earth|''OUR'' PLANET]]! '''YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP!''' DAMN YOU! '''DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!'''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''NASA Technician''': ''[counting down to launch]'' Three... Two... One... MAKE ROCKET GO NOW!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent''': We're just about to get our first pictures from inside the spacecraft with &quot;average-naut&quot; Homer Simpson, and we'd like to...
:''[an ant floats past the screen]''
:'''Kent''': Ahhhh!
:'''Simpsons family''': AHHHHHHHH!
:''[the picture breaks up]''
:'''Kent''': Folks, we just lost the picture, but...what we've seen...speaks for itself.  The spacecraft has apparently been taken over – &quot;conquered&quot; if you will – by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive earth men or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain. There is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I for one welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I could be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': It begins!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Homer has sent potato chips loose in zero gravity]''
:'''[[Buzz Aldrin]]''': Careful, they're ruffled!

===''[[w:Homer Loves Flanders|Homer Loves Flanders]]''===
:''[Ned has just offered Homer tickets to the game]''
:'''Homer''': Why do you mock me, Lord?
:'''Marge''': Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle Bart threw up there
:''[Marge knocks it down]''
:'''Homer''': I know I shouldn't eat thee but... ''[does it anyway]'' Mmmm, sacralicious.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lenny and Carl see Homer and Ned drive by, but Homer buries Ned's head out of view so they don't see him with Flanders]''
:'''Homer''': Hi!
:'''Lenny''': Hey, look! Homer's got one of those robot cars!
:''[The car crashes off-screen due to Homer pushing Ned's head down]''
:'''Carl''': One of those ''American'' robot cars.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Mr. Burns talking to football players before the game]''
:'''[[w:Mr. Burns|Mr. Burns]]''': Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital who wants you to win this game. I know because... I crippled him myself to inspire you.
:''[Cuts to Milhouse lying in a hospital bed with a broken leg and his parents at his side.]''
:'''[[w:Milhouse Van Houten|Milhouse]]''': I hope they win or Mr. Burns said he's coming back.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mayor Quimby''': I'll take two dogs, two sodas... and, uh, two ice cream bars. ''[as they are passed along the row towards him, Homer snatches two bites from his dogs]'' What the hell happened to my dogs? I want answers.
:'''Homer''': Well, I guess I should pay my share.
:'''Ned''': ''[chuckling]'' Relax, Homer. I keep telling you. You're my guest.
:'''Homer''': Ooh, you brought me a nacho hat! Thanks, Ned. ''[dips a nacho in it, then eats it, singing]'' Nacho, nacho man, I want to be a nacho man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''(after seeing a news report for Springfield's upcoming football game)''
:'''Bart''' ''(waves two pieces of paper in front of Homer's face)'': Hey, Dad, sell you these for fifty bucks.
:'''Homer''': Woo hoo! Sold! ''(Bart takes the money and runs off)''
:'''Marge''': Those aren't tickets to the game, Homer.
:'''Homer''': What do you mean? It says right here: &quot;Free wig with every purchase of large wig. Downtown Wig Center&quot;. ''(screams)'': Why you little -- (immediately calms down as he sits down and thinks it over) Hmm, free wig.
:''(Homer imagines himself with Marge's hair, as he looks at himself in the mirror)''
:'''Homer''' ''(imitating Marge)'': I love you, Homie. Mmm. ''(normal voice)'': Heh, heh, heh. I don't need her at all anymore.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lovejoy''': Now let us bow our heads in a silent prayer of Thanksgiving. ''[all the churchgoers do so. Homer is breathing through his nose, which gets louder with each breath, annoying Ned]''
:'''Ned''': ''[furiously and annoyed]'' '''STOP IT!!! BREATHE THROUGH YOUR ''DAMN'' MOUTH!''' ''[Lovejoy and the churchgoers gasp]'' Oh, can't you see this man's not a hero!? He's annoying! He's very, very annoying!
:'''Helen''': Well, Ned's just jealous!
:'''Moe''': The man's hepped up on goofballs!
:'''Abe''': Let's sacrifice him to our ''God!'' ''(the room falls silent as everyone looks at Grampa in horror)'': We did it all the time in the 30's.

===''[[w:Bart Gets an Elephant|Bart Gets an Elephant]]''===
:''[Homer, Bart, and Lisa discuss their plans after breakfast.]''
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': After breakfast, me and Milhouse are going down to the ravine. We got a tip from a five-year-old that there's a dead Martian down there.
:'''[[w:Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': And I'm going to jam with the Little White Girls Blues Quartet. ''[to Homer]:'' Wanna come with me, Daddy-o?
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Sorry, honey. I'd love to, but Daddy has to go to a beer-drinking contest.
:'''Bart''': Think you'll win?
:'''Homer''': Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose; it's how drunk you get.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': What's the point of all this cleaning?! Are we so vain?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Moe''': Hey Clinton, get back to work!
:'''[[Bill Clinton]]''': Make me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grampa''': Hey, they're playing the elephant song!
:'''Jasper''': I love that. Reminds me of elephants.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kent Brockman''': So isn't that what we're all asking in our own lives – &quot;Where's my elephant?&quot; I know that's what I've been asking.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[rides on Stampy]'' Ha-ha! Smithers, this reminds me of that fat man I used to ride to work!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Look at this, Marge: $58 and all of it profit! I'm the smartest businessman in the world.
:'''Marge''': Stampy's food bill today was $300.
:'''Homer''': ''[scared]'' Marge, please, don't humiliate me in front of the money.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lisa''': Mr. Blackheart?
:'''Mr. Blackheart''': Yes, my pretty?
:'''Lisa''': Are you an ivory dealer?
:'''Mr. Blackheart''': ''[chuckles]'' Little girl, I've had lots of jobs in my day: Whale hunter, seal clubber, president of the Fox network ... and like most people, yeah, I've dealt a little ivory.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ned Flanders''': Look! It's the four elephants of the Apocalypse!
:'''Maude''': That's &quot;Horsemen,&quot; Ned.
:'''Ned''': Well, getting closer. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': He took Bart too?! ''[yells out the window]'' THAT WASN'T PART OF OUR DEAL BLACKHEART! THAT. WASN'T. PAAAAART!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[At Springfield Police Station]''
:'''Chief Wiggum''': ''[sarcastically]'' Yeah, right, lady: an elephant ran through your front yard. OK. [goes to another line] Wiggum...yeah, right, mister, mm hm. An elephant just knocked over your mailbox. OK. [goes to another line] Wiggum...Yeah, right, buddy, liquor store robbery, officer down. Sure...and I'm Edward G. Robinson!

===''[[w:Burns' Heir|Burns' Heir]]''===
:'''Smithers''': I got a mink chamois, sir. I hope it-- ''[gasp]'' Oh, my God, Mr. Burns is dead! Aw! Why do the good always die so young?
:'''Mr. Burns''': ''[emerges, strangles Smithers]'' You almost killed me!
:'''Smithers''': Please, sir... ''[places towel on Burns' shoulders]'' you'll catch..cold.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Milhouse''': I have nothing to offer you but my love.
:'''Mr. Burns''': I specifically said ''no geeks''!
:'''Milhouse''': ''[dejected]'' But my mom says I'm cool...
:'''Mr. Burns''': Next!
:'''Nelson Muntz''': Give me your fortune or I'll pound your withered old face in!
:'''Mr. Burns''': Ooh, I like his energy. Put him on the callback list.
:'''Martin Prince''': ''[Singing]'' ''[[w:The Trolley Song|Clang, clang, clang went the trolley! Ring, ring, ring went the bell! Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings]]--''
:''[Nelson runs onto the stage and cold cocks him. Martin collapses.]'' 
:'''Mr. Burns''': Thank you. Give the bully an extra point.
:'''Lisa''': ''[clears throat]'' I propose to you that your heir not need be a boy. In this [[wikt:phallocentric|phallocentric]] society of ours -
:'''Mr Burns''': I don't know what 'phallocentric' means, but ''no girls''!
:'''Milhouse''': ''[offstage, in a dress and wig]'' So much for Plan B.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[a stone suddenly crashes through Burns' library glass window, landing at his feet]''
:'''Mr. Burns''': Oh, look. A bird has become petrified and lost its sense of direction.
:'''Smithers''': I think it is a rock, sir.
:'''Mr. Burns''': We'll see what the lab has to say about that.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[''Bart smashes up Burns' residence in anger for not being chosen as the heir, smashing windows and decapitating statues'']
:'''Mr. Burns''': Heh heh, look, Smithers -- a creature of pure malevolence. He's the perfect one to suckle at my proverbial teat. ''[opens window]'' [[A Christmas Carol|You there, boy!  What day is this?]]
:'''Boy''': ''[with an exaggerated [[w:Cockney accent|Cockney accent]]]'' Today, sir? Why, it's Christmas Day!
:'''Mr. Burns''': I was talking to ''him''. [''points at Bart''] You!  What day is this?
:'''Bart''': Huh?
:'''Mr. Burns''': I'll tell you what day this is: today is the day you become my heir!
:[''Bart throws a rock which hits Smithers in the head'']
:'''Mr. Burns''': Ooh, I like him a lot.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Simpsons family are eating dinner, Bart throws peas at Lisa]''
:'''Lisa''': Hey! Mom, Bart's throwing peas! 
:'''Marge''': Bart, don't throw peas at your sister.
:'''Bart''': Mr. Burns throws peas at Smithers. ''[throws another peas at Lisa]''
:'''Lisa''': Ow! That was a big one!
:'''Marge''': Homer, say something.
:'''Homer''': Okay. Lisa, quit getting in the way of your wealthy brother's peas.
:'''Marge''': ''[groans]''
:'''Bart''': Oh, yuck. Meat loaf. My most hated of all loafs. ''[feeds his piece to SHL]''
:'''Homer''': ''[gasps]'' That was the end piece! ''[turns red in anger]'' That's it! Being abusive to your family is one thing but I will not stand idly by and watch you feed a hungry dog! ''[point upwards]'' Go to your room!  
:'''Bart''': No! This family stinks! Mr. Burns nurtures my destructive side. I'm suffocating here.
:'''Homer''': Bart, you listen!  
:'''Bart''': Oh, go eat some flowers! ''[tosses flowers at Homer]''
:'''Homer''': My secret shame.
:''[Bart storms out of his house, riding his bicycle]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Deprogrammer''': Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, your son has clearly been brainwashed by the evil and charismatic Mr. Burns.
:'''Marge''': Are you sure you can get him back for us?
:'''Deprogrammer''': Absolutely. I'm the one who successfully deprogrammed [[Jane Fonda]], you know.
:'''Marge''': What about [[w:Peter Fonda|Peter Fonda]]?
:'''Deprogrammer''': Oh, that was a heartbreaker. But I did get [[Paul McCartney]] out of [[w:Wings (band)|Wings]].
:'''Homer''': You idiot! He was the most talented one!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart turns on his model train and it leaves the room]''
:'''Milhouse''': Where does it go?
:'''Bart''': I don't know, but it won't be back for three hours. One time it had snow on it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': People, that was all wrong! Homer Simpson doesn't say &quot;Boh&quot;, he says... [''Flips through a script to he gets to a page.''] Doh!
:''[The fake Homer and Marge take off their masks.]''
:'''British Fake Homer''': Sorry, M.B., but I'm having trouble with this character. Is he supposed to have some kind of neurological impairment like Rain Man or Awakenings. I mean, what the hell am I doing here?
:'''Fake Marge''': And this dialogue has none of the wit and sparkle of [[w:Murphy Brown|Murphy Brown]].
:'''Fake Lisa''': [''Takes off his mask and smokes his cigar''] Hey, you know we are getting into Golden Time.
:'''Mr. Burns''': Yes well just get it right, or you'll be back doing [[w:Come Blow Your Horn|Come Blow Your Horn]] at the Westport Dinner Theatre.

===''[[w:Sweet Seymour Skinner's Badasssss Song|Sweet Seymour Skinner's Badasssss Song]]''===
:'''[[w:Springfield Elementary School#Superintendent Chalmers|Superintendent Chalmers]]''': Seymour? You're fired!
:'''[[w:Seymour Skinner|Principal Skinner]]''': I'm sorry, di-did you just call me a liar?
:'''Superintendent Chalmers''': No, I said you were fired.
:'''Principal Skinner''': Oh. That's much worse.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Come on, Chalmie, you fired Skinner for less than this.
:'''Superintendent Chalmers''': Yeah, I did, but... Skinner really bugged me. Besides, the way America's public schools are sliding, they'll all be this way in a few months. I say, lay back and enjoy it, it's a hell of a toboggan ride.
:'''[[w:Ned Flanders|Ned]]''': ''[over PA]'' Well, cockly-doodly-doo, little buddies. Let's thank the Lord for another beautiful school day.
:'''Superintendent Chalmers''': Thank the Lor-- thank the Lord? That sounded like a prayer. A prayer. A prayer in a public school! God has no place within these walls, just like facts have no place within organized religion. Simpson, you get your wish. Flanders is history!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Principal Skinner''': Now I... I finally have time to do what I've always wanted: write the [[w:Great American Novel|Great American Novel]]. Mine is about [[w:Jurassic Park|a futuristic amusement park where dinosaurs are brought to life through advanced cloning techniques]]. I call it &quot;Billy and the Cloneasaurus.&quot;
:'''Apu''': Oh, you have got to be ''kidding'', sir. First you think of an idea that has already been done. And then you give it a title that nobody could ''possibly'' like! Didn't you think this through?...''[fade to later]''... was on the bestseller list for ''eighteen months!'' Every magazine cover had it...''[fade to later]''...most popular movies of all ''time'', sir! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!?! ''[Skinner hangs his head in shame as Apu calms down]'' ...I mean, thank you, come again.

===''[[w:The Boy Who Knew Too Much|The Boy Who Knew Too Much]]''===
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Wow, that is the biggest Rice Krispie square I've ever seen! The rich sure know how to live.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': ''[lowers a table out of the hotel window; then drops it]'' Got it, Barn?
:'''[[w:Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': ''[offscreen, below hotel]'' Got what? ''[table drops on his head]'' Ow!
:'''[[w:Seymour Skinner|Principal Skinner]]''': You're stealing a table?
:'''Homer''': I'm not stealing it. Hotels expect you to take a few things. It's a souvenir!
:'''Principal Skinner''': Ah... Is that my necktie you're wearing?
:'''Homer''': Souvenir.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Scott Christian''': Let's go over to the county courthouse live to Kent Brockman.
:'''Kent Brockman''': —ockman, just outside the county courtroom where an argument about chowder has spilled over into the biggest trial in Springfield history. Behind these doors, a federal judge will ladle out steaming bowls of rich, creamy justice in a case the media have dubbed &quot;Beat-Up Waiter&quot;. ''[pfft]'' This reporter suggested &quot;[[Watergate scandal|Waitergate]]&quot;, but was shouted down at the press club. Now, it's illegal to televise court proceedings in this state, ''[whispers]'' so we'll have to be quiet. ''[courtroom doors close in his face]'' Dooh—!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''[[w:Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Mom, what if there's a really bad, crummy guy who's going to jail, but I know he's innocent?
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': Well, Bart, your Uncle Arthur used to have a saying: &quot;Shoot 'em all and let God sort them out.&quot; Unfortunately, one day he put his theory into practice. It took 75 Federal Marshals to bring him down. Now let's never speak of this again. ''[she then starts humming and dusting the TV]''
:'''Bart''': Mom, what if I can get this guy off the hook? Should I do it?
:'''Marge''': Honey, you should listen to your heart... and not the voices in your head, like a certain uncle did one gray December morn.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Chief Wiggum''': Oh, my God... Someone's taken a bite out of the big Rice Krispie square! ...Oh, yeah, and the waiter's been brutally beaten, heh-heh.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[reads the verdict paper]'' What does &quot;[[wiktionary:sequestered|sequestered]]&quot; mean?
:'''Skinner''': It means if we're deadlocked we'll be put up somewhere until we reach a decision.
:'''Homer''': What does &quot;[[wiktionary:deadlocked|deadlocked]]&quot; mean?
:'''Skinner''': It means the jury cannot reach a unanimous decision.
:'''Homer''': Uh-huh. And &quot;[[wiktionary:if|if]]&quot;?
:'''Skinner''': Conjunction meaning &quot;in the event that&quot; or &quot;on condition that&quot;.
:'''Homer''': So IF we cannot reach a decision, the jury will be DEADLOCKED, and then we'll be SEQUESTERED in the Springfield Palace Hotel.
:'''Patty''': That's not going to happen, Homer.
:'''Jasper''': Let's vote. My liver is failing.
:'''Homer''': Where we'll get free rooms, free food, free TV, free {{w|HBO}}, OOOH! [[Free Willy|FREE WILLY]]! ''[Skinner snatches paper from him]''
:'''Skinner''': Justice is not a frivolous thing, Simpson. It has little, if anything, to do with a disobedient whale. Now let's vote!
:'''Homer''': What are all of you voting?
:'''Everyone''': Guilty.
:'''Homer''': Uh-huh. How many S's in innocent?
:''[everyone else groans]''
:'''Homer''': Now I'm only doing what I think is right. I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Bart sees Skinner in the jury; Skinner thinks his thoughts to him]''
:'''Principal Skinner''': I know you can read my thoughts, Bart. Just a little reminder: If I find out you cut class, your ass is mine. Yeah, you heard me. I think words I would never say. ''[camera pans left to Homer]''
:'''Homer''': I know you can read ''my'' thoughts, boy. ''[sings {{w|Meow Mix}} jingle]'' ''Meow-meow-meow-meow, meow-meow-meow-meow, meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow.''

===''[[w:Lady Bouvier's Lover|Lady Bouvier's Lover]]''===
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': Homer, you didn't do a very good job frosting Maggie's birthday cake.
:''[The cake reads, &quot;Happy Birthday Magaggie&quot;.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': What? It's not Magaggie's birthday?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': If he marries your mother, Marge, we'll be brother and sister! And then our kids... they'll be horrible freaks with pink skin, no overbites, and five fingers on each hand!
:''[Homer imagines his children as more realistic-looking humans, screams and runs from the room]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mrs. Bouvier''': Oh, Monty, I swear you're the devil himself.
:'''Mr. Burns''': I...Who told you?! ...Oh, ah, yes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Burns''': I specifically requested ''no'' romantic music! What…?
:'''Abraham Simpson''': ''[stops playing organ, trying to pounds the window]'' Mrs. Bouvier! Mrs. Bouvier! ''[Glass breaks, he falls to the church floor, saved Jacqueline]'' Mrs. Bouvier!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines as Grampa gets back together with Mrs. Bouvier in a bus]''
:'''Simon &amp; Garfunkel''': ''[voices only]'' ♪ ''Hello Grampa, my old friend'' ♪
:♪ ''Your busy day is at an end'' ♪ ''[the executive producers' names appear in darkness]''
:♪ ''Your exploits have been sad and boring'' ♪ ''[the credits begin playing]''
:♪ ''They tell a tale, that's worth ignoring'' ♪
:♪ ''When you're alone, the words of your story will echo down the rest home hall'' ♪
:♪ ''Cuz no one at all'' ♪
:♪ ''Can stand the sound of Grampa'' ♪
:'''Abraham Simpson''': ''[voice only, in credits]'' I first took a fancy to Mrs. Bouvier because her raspy voice reminded me of my old Victrola. Oh, it was a fine machine with a vulcanized rubber listening tube which you crammed in your ear! The tube would go in easy with some sort of lubricant like linseed oil or Dr. Shumway's... ''[the Gracie Films logo appears]'' Oops. I'm sorry!

===''[[w:Secrets of a Successful Marriage|Secrets of a Successful Marriage]]''===
:''[Homer and Marge are discussing ways for Homer to better himself.]''
:'''[[w:Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Oh... and how is &quot;''education''&quot; supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home wine-making course and I forgot how to drive?
:'''[[w:Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': That's because you were drunk!
:'''Homer''': And how.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': So, little Lisa, apple of my eye: how are things down at the old schoolhouse?
:'''Lisa''': I find this demeaning and embarrassing beyond my worst nightmares.
:'''Homer''': ''[hearty laughter]'' And how's my little major-leaguer?  Catch any junebugs today?
:'''Bart''': Oh, me and Milhouse took some mail from the mail truck and threw it down the sewer.
:'''Homer''': ''[with barely-concealed anger]'': Son, I know you meant well, but that wasn't the right thing to do.
:'''Bart''': What the hell are you talking about?  You're the one who double-dared us.
:'''Homer''': ''[explodes with anger]'': Why you little -- ''[strangles Bart]''
:'''Marge''': Homer!
:'''Bart''': I'm outta here!
:'''Lisa''': Me too. 
:''[Bart and Lisa leave]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[as Marge kicks out Homer's class -- and Homer]''
:'''Homer''': All right, we're breaking early tonight, class. For tomorrow, you should read pages seven to 18 in Lisa's diary.
:'''Marge''': You too.
:'''Homer''': Huh?
:'''Marge''': Get out!
:'''Homer''': But I'm not in a cla-
:''[Marge angrily pushes Homer onto the ground and slams the door, Otto puts his hand on Homer's shoulder]''
:'''Otto''': Uh, is any of this gonna be on the test? 'Cause I wasn't payin' attention.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': ''[after Marge kicks him out of his house]'' Oh. Fine. If that's what you want, you've got it. ''[walks away from his house]'' This scene is gettin' old, man. I'm hittin' the road. Maybe I'll drop you a line someday from wherever I wind up in this crazy old world. ''[walks into the streets]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Oh, good. Reverend Lovejoy will make Marge take me back. He ''has'' to push the sanctity of marriage, or his god will punish him!
:''[Immediate cut to Reverend and Mrs. Lovejoy talking with Marge in the living room.]''
:'''[[w:Reverend Timothy Lovejoy|Reverend Lovejoy]]''': ''[flatly]'' Get a divorce.
:'''[[w:List of recurring characters in The Simpsons#Helen Lovejoy|Helen Lovejoy]]''': Mmm-hmm.
:'''Marge''': But isn't that a sin?
:'''Reverend Lovejoy''': Marge, just about everything is a sin. You ever sat down and read [[The Bible|this thing]]? Technically, we're not allowed to go to the bathroom.

{{DEFAULTSORT:Simpsons, Season 05}}
[[Category:The Simpsons seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>go7mxs79pb1tr9bz94t6iyretxoz8rx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Koenraad Elst</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>34182</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964919</id>
      <parentid>3921120</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:54:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964919</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9027" sha1="m4ety73jylz1go1gqbfv55lqrcj2kfs" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Koenraad Elst at Varanasi.jpg|thumb|The essence of Hindu [[Dharma]] is not ‘tolerance’ or ‘equal respect for all religious’ but [[w:Satya|satya]], truth.]]
'''[[w:Koenraad Elst|Koenraad Elst]]''' (born [[7 August]] [[w:1959|1959]]), is a Belgian author, known primarily for his adherence to the [[Hindutva]] ideology and support of the {{w|Out of India Theory}}, which is regarded as pseudohistorical by mainstream scholarship. Scholars accuse him of promoting [[Islamophobia]].

== Quotes ==
=== 1990s ===
*Conversely, banning this book would send a signal that the present establishment will do what it can to prevent [[Hinduism]] from rising up, from regaining self-confidence, from facing the challenge of hostile ideologies.
**''Freedom of expression - Secular Theocracy Versus Liberal Democracy'' (1998, edited by Sita Ram Goel) {{ISBN|81-85990-55-7}}

* While one should always be vigilant for traces of [[totalitarianism]] in any ideology or movement, the obsession with [[fascism]] in the anti-Hindu rhetoric of the [[Secularism in India|secularists]] is not the product of an analysis of the data, but of their own political compulsions.
** ''Ayodhya and After: Issues Before Hindu Society (1991)''

* The essence of Hindu [[Dharma]] is not ‘tolerance’ or ‘equal respect for all religious’ but [[w:Satya|satya]], truth. The problem with [[Christianity]] and [[Islam]] is superficially their intolerance and fanaticism. But this intolerance is a consequence of these religions’ untruthfulness. If your belief system is based on delusions, you have to pre-empt rational enquiry into it and shield it from contact with more sustainable thought systems. The fundamental problem with monotheistic religions is not that they are intolerant but that they are untrue (Asatya or Anrita).
** Sita Ram Goel: ''Jesus Christ - An Artifice for Aggression'' (1994)

* One thing which keeps on astonishing me in the present debate is the complete lack of doubt in both camps.  Personally, I don’t think that either theory, of Aryan invasion and of Aryan indigenousness, can claim to have been &quot;proven&quot; by prevalent standards of proof; even though one of the contenders is getting closer.  Indeed, while I have enjoyed pointing out the flaws in the AIT statements of the politicized Indian academic establishment and its American amplifiers, I cannot rule out the possibility that the theory which they are defending may still have its merits.&quot;
** ''Update on the Aryan Invasion Debate,'' (1999)

=== 2000s ===
* Not [[Muslim|Muslims]] but Islam is the problem.
** {{cite web |url=http://koenraadelst.bharatvani.org/reviews/saffronwave.html |title=Book Review - Saffron Wave }}{{cite book |url=http://koenraadelst.bharatvani.org/articles/politics/PolSec03AyubKhan1.html |title=Let's Combat Communalism |last=Koenraad |first=Elst |title=Sangh Parivar's Apologist&quot;, a review of ''Decolonizing the Hindu Mind'': Ideological development of Hindu Revivalism |location=Rupa, Delhi |date=2001 by Ayub Khan in Communalism Watch, 13 March 2003 }}{{cite book |author=Lucas Catherine |title=Vuile Arabieren |page=81 |language=Dutch }} quoted at {{cite web |url=http://koenraadelst.bharatvani.org/articles/dutch/isvb.html |title=Het VB en de islam |first=Koenraad |last=Elst }}

* Future historians will include the no-temple argument of the 1990s as a remarkable [[case study]] in their surveys of academic fraud and politicized scholarship.
** ''Ayodhya: The Case Against the Temple (2002)'' 

* I am neither a Hindu nor a nationalist. And I don’t need to belong to those or to any specific ideological categories in order to use my eyes and ears.
**From an interview with Dr. Ramesh Rao (2002) at ''sulekha.com''

*My job was not to survey other people's opinions about the Hindu movement. That would have been an interesting exercise, especially if it is called by its name, viz. a survey of outsider opinions, and not (as many such academic publications are) falsely presented as a study of the Hindu movement itself. By contrast, I endeavoured to get beyond the secondary--source and mainly hostile-source &quot;research&quot; that has so disastrously filled up this field of study, and focus on the primary sources instead.
**''Lets combat communalism'' (Elst, 2001)

*I have also never participated in any of the meetings of the various embryonic attempts at creating a &quot;Pagan international&quot;, whether the Pagan Federation, the World Council of Ethnic Religions or the World Council of the Elders of the Ancient Traditions and Cultures.  But I wish them all the best, for they consist mostly of nice people and I can easily see through the attempts by so-called secularists to blacken them and to deny to them the right of international networking which is deemed only natural in the case of Christians or Muslims.
**Hinduism, Environmentalism and the Nazi Bogey -- A preliminary reply to Ms. Meera Nanda, In: Return of the Swastika: Hate and Hysteria versus Hindu Sanity (2007), chapter 3.

*Indeed, over the years I have had many a good laugh at the pompous moralism and blatant dishonesty of India's so-called secularists. Their specialty is to justify double standards, e.g. why mentioning murdered Kashmiri Pandits is “communal hate-mongering” while the endless litany about murdered Gujarati Muslims is “secular consciousness-raising”. Sometimes they merely stonewall inconvenient information, such as when they tried to deny and suppress the historical data about the forcible replacement of a Rama temple in Ayodhya by a mosque: given the strength of the evidence, all they could do was to drown out any serious debate with screams and swearwords. But often they do bring out their specific talents at sophistry, such as when they argue that a Common Civil Code, a defining element of all secular states, is a Hindu communalist notion, while the preservation of the divinely-revealed Shari’a for the Muslims is secular. That’s when they are at their best. 
**Hinduism, Environmentalism and the Nazi Bogey -- A preliminary reply to Ms. Meera Nanda, In: Return of the Swastika: Hate and Hysteria versus Hindu Sanity (2007), chapter 3.

* Hindutva is a fairly crude ideology, borrowing heavily from European nationalisms with their emphasis on homogeneity. Under the conditions of British colonialism, it was inevitable that some such form of Hindu nationalism would arise, but I believe better alternatives have seen the light, more attuned to the genius of Hindu civilization.
** {{cite web |url=http://koenraadelst.bharatvani.org/articles/politics/PolSec03AyubKhan1.html |title=Let's Combat Communalism, In: The Problem with Secularism (2007), ch. 10 }}

==== '' Who is a Hindu,'' (2001) ====
* As so often in Indo-Pakistani and Hindu-Muslim comparisons, the argument is reminiscent of the inequality between the contenders in the Cold War: you could demonstrate for disarmament in the West, but to demonstrate for this in the East Bloc (except if it were for unilateral disarmament by the Western “war-mongers”) would have put you in trouble.

* The neologism [[Adivasi|âdivâsî]] constitutes one of the most successful [[disinformation]] campaigns in modern history.

* In the West, secularism implies pinpricking religious fraud and arrogance, but in India, secularists are the most eloquent defenders of myth and theocracy.

* Until 1989, there was a complete consensus in all sources (Hindu, Muslim and European) which spoke out on the matter, viz. that the Babri Masjid had been built in forcible replacement of a Hindu temple.&quot;

==Quotes about Koenraad Elst==
* On the eve of his departure, Koenraad Elst asked me if I would publish a book on Ayodhya which he planned to write on his return to Belgium, I did not take him seriously. I did not know at that time that the thirty one years old Belgian we had met was a prodigy, and that he felt so deeply about Hindus having a good case but presenting it very badly. The script of his Ram Janmabhoomi Vs. Babri Masjid: A Case Study in Hindu Muslim Conflict, was dropped on my table by the postman exactly after a month. I could not stop after I started reading it. I took it to Ram Swarup the same evening. He read it during the night and rang me up next morning. Koenraad Elst's book, he said, should be published immediately.
** Sita Ram Goel (1998) ''How I became a Hindu.''

* Elst had much better command of political and social issues in India than I ever gained, unmatched by any western writer and researched in great detail. Elst is a thorough scholar and supremely rational in all that he does. His work on the Ayodhya movement was definitive.
** [[w:David Frawley|David Frawley]], ''How I Became a Hindu: My Discovery of Vedic Dharma'' p. 96

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
*[http://koenraadelst.bharatvani.org/ Articles and Books by Dr. Elst]
*[http://koenraadelst.blogspot.com Elst's blog]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Elst, Koenraad}}
[[Category:Hindu nationalists]]
[[Category:Authors]]
[[Category:Belgians]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>m4ety73jylz1go1gqbfv55lqrcj2kfs</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Brother Bear 2</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>39722</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965248</id>
      <parentid>3937547</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:05:26Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965248</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2965" sha1="k6gf18xab1ro7elisnxa35f6jd66l5b" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Brother Bear 2|Brother Bear 2]]''''' is a [[w:2006 in film|2006]] American animated direct-to-video film produced by [[w:Disneytoon Studios|Disneytoon Studios]] and released by [[w:Walt Disney Studios Home Entertainment|Walt Disney Home Entertainment]]. It is a sequel to the [[w:2003 in film|2003]] animated feature ''[[Brother Bear]]''.


== Kenai ==
*Koda!
*Koda, answer me!

== Koda ==
* Rest?  We've been hibernating for six ''months''.  Who needs rest?
* Ugh, that is the most disgusting thing I have ever smelled.  Let's go check it out.
* ''(Laughs)'' Awesome! Let's do it again!
* (''sniffs'') They go back with them!

== Nita ==
* Once you love someone, they stay in your heart forever.
* This is the most fun I've had since we were kids!
* ''(when she first sees Kenai in his new form)'' Wow! I heard you were a bear. I just didn't realize you'd look so much, uh, like a bear.
* I love you, too.
* That went well.

== Tuke ==
* Oh, gee! She's after us, eh!

== Dialogue ==
:'''Nita''': They say that in all the tribes, ''you'' are the wisest shaman.
:'''Shaman''': Sha-WO-man! Okay? &quot;Wise&quot; and &quot;man&quot; don't even belong in the same sentence. 
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Koda''': So ''you're'' Nita. Kenai was just dreaming about you.
:'''Kenai''': I was not.
:'''Koda''': Were too. You should have heard him. 'Nita, ''Nita''.'

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Kenai''': Well, you ready to get going?
:'''Nita''': But I'll never be able to cross that river.
:'''Kenai''': We can do that together too.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nita''': Do you ever miss being...human? I mean, have-have you ever thought about...changing...back?
:'''Kenai''': Yeah, I've... I've thought about it.
:'''Koda''': I'm really.
:'''Kenai''': Koda.
:'''Koda''': (sniffs) They're going back with them!
:'''Kenai''': Koda, wai... Koda, wait!
:(''Nita and Kenai chase after Koda'')
:'''Kenai''': Koda! (he and Nita continue chasing. Suddenly he stops) Koda, answer me!!! (''echoing'')

== Taglines ==
* The moose are on the loose.
* Guys and girls are totally different animals.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title| id=0465925| title=Brother Bear 2}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes| id=brother_bear_2| title=Brother Bear 2}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:Brother Bear]]
[[Category:2006 animated films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American sequel films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age animated films]]
[[Category:American animated romance films]]
[[Category:Animated films about bears]]
[[Category:Animated films about raccoons]]
[[Category:Animated films about brothers]]
[[Category:Animated films set in prehistory]]
[[Category:Films set in Alaska]]
[[Category:Disney direct-to-video animated films]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:Animated films about shapeshifting]]</text>
      <sha1>k6gf18xab1ro7elisnxa35f6jd66l5b</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Theodor Mommsen</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>41498</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965197</id>
      <parentid>3934279</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:27:06Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Jnestorius</username>
        <id>142717</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* The History of Rome - Volume 4: Part 1 */ Spelling</comment>
      <origin>3965197</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="116292" sha1="jpj3ufcd4a96hsxbaqy56njw5otmwxq" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Theodor Mommsen 1902.jpg|thumb|Theodor Mommsen in 1902]]

'''[[w:Theodor Mommsen|Christian Matthias Theodor Mommsen]]''' ([[30 November]] [[1817]] – [[1 November]] [[1903]]) was a German classical scholar, jurist and historian, generally regarded as the greatest classicist of the 19th century. He received the [[w:Nobel Prize in Literature|Nobel Prize in Literature]] in 1902, and was also a prominent German politician, as a member of the Prussian and German parliaments.

== Quotes ==

[[File:Theodor Mommsen 02.jpg|thumb|right|Hypocrisy is the homage that vice pays to virtue.]]

* The ancient boundary of Italy on the north was not the Alps but the Apennines.
** ''The History of Rome''

* All power, as well as all the impotence of democracy is based on faith
** ''The History of Rome''

* The czech skull is impervious to reason, but it is scuceptible to blows.

=== ''The History of Rome'' - Volume 1 ===

* The Mediterranean Sea with its various branches, penetrating far into the great Continent, forms the largest gul of the ocean, and, alternately narrowed by islands or projections of the land and expanding to considerable breadth, at once separates and connects the three divisions of the Old World. The shores of this inland sea were in ancient times peopled by various nations, belonging in an ethno-graphical and philological point of view to different races, but constituting in their historical aspect one whole. This historic whole has been usually, but not very appropriately, entitled the history of the ancient world. It is in reality the history of the civilization among the Mediterranean nations; and as it passes before us in its successive stages, it presents four great phases of development, - the history of the Coptic or Egyptian stock dwelling on the southern shore, the history of the Aramaean or Syrian Nation, which occupied the east coast and extended into the interior of Asia as far as the [[Euphrates and Tigris]], and the histories of the twin-peoples, the Hellenes and the Italians, who received as their heritage the countries bordering on its European shores. Each of these histories was in its earlier stages connected with other regions and with other cycles of historical evolution, but each soon entered on its own peculiar career. The surrounding nations of alien or even of kindred extraction, - the Berbers and Negroes of Africa, the Arabs and Persians, and Indians of Asia, the Celts and Germs of Europe, - came into manifold contact with the peoples inhabiting the borders of the Mediterranean, but they neither imparted unto them nor received from them any influences of really decisive effect upon their respective destinies. So far, therefore, as cycles of culture admit of demarcation at all, we may regard that cycle as a unity which has its culminating points denoted by the names Thebes, Carthage, Athens, and Rome.The four nations represented by these names, after each of them had attained in a path of its own peculiar and noble civilization, mingled with one another in the most varied relations of reciprocal intercourse, and skilfully elaborated and richly developed all the elements of human nature. At length their cycle as accomplished. New peoples who hitherto had onled laved the territories of the states of the Mediterranean, as waves lave the beach, overflowed both shores, severed the history of its south coast from that of the north, and transferred the centre of civilization from the Mediterranean to the Atlantic Ocean. '''The distinction between ancient and modern history, therefore, is no mere accident, nor yet a mere matter of chronological convenience. What is called modern history is in reality the formation of a new cycle of culture, connected at several epochs of its development with the perishing or perished civilization of the mediterranean states, as that was connected with the primitive civilization of the Indo-Germanic stock, but destined, like that earlier cycle, to traverse an orbit of its own. It too is destined to experience in full measure the vicissitudes of national weal and woe, period of growth, of full vigour, and of age, the blessedness of creative effort, in religion, polity, and art, the comfort of enjoying the material and intellectual acquisitions it has won, perhaps also, some day, the decay of productive power in the satiety of contentment with the goal attained. But that goal too will only be temporary: the grandest system of civilization has its orbit, and may complete its course; but not so the human race, to which, even when it seems to have attained its goal, the old task is ever set anew with a wider range and with a deeper meaning.'''
** Vol. 1, pt. 1, translated by W.P.Dickson.
** Introductory Paragraph 

*'''The great problem of man, how to live in conscioues harmony with himself, with his neighbor, and with the whole to which he belongs, admits of as many solutions as there are provinces in our Father's kingdom; and it is in this, and not in the material sphere, that individuals and nations display their divergences of character.''' The exciting causes which gave rise to this intrinsic contrast must have been in the Græco-Italian period as yet wanting; it was not until the Hellenes and Italians separated that deep-seated diversity of mental character became manifest, the effects of which contiue to the present day.The family and the state, religion and art, received in Italy and in Greece respectively a development so peculiar and so thoroughly national, that the common basis, on which in these respects also the two peoples rested, has been so overgrown as to be almost concealed from our view. That Hellenic character, which sacrificed the whole to its individual elements, the nation to the single state, and the single state to the citizen; whose ideal of life was the beautiful and the good; and, only too often, the pleasure of idleness; whose political development consisted in intensifying the original individualism of the several cantons, and subsequently led to the internal dissolution of the authority of the state; whose view of religion first invested its gods with human attributes, and then denied their existence; which gave full play to the limbs in the sports of the naked youth, and gave free scope to thought in all its grandeur and in all its awfulness;- and that Roman character, which solemnly bound the son to reverence the father, the citizen to reverence the ruler, and all to reverence the gods; which required nothing; and honoured nothing, but the useful act, and compelled every citizen to fill up every moment of his brief life with unceasing work ; which made it a duty even in the boy to modestly to cover the body; which deemed every one a bad citizen who wished to be different from his fellows; which viewed the states as all in all, and a desire for the state's extension as the only aspiration not liable to censure,- who can in thought trace back these sharply-marked contrasts to that original unity which embraced them both, prepared the way for their development, and at length produced them?
** Vol. 1, pt. 1, Chapter 2: &quot;Into Italy&quot; Translated by W.P.Dickson.

[[File:Triade Capitolina img126.jpg|thumb|255px|right|[[w:Capitoline Triad|Capitoline Triad]] – Museum of Palestrina The great problem of man, how to live in conscioues harmony with himself, with his neighbor, and with the whole to which he belongs, admits of as many solutions as there are provinces in our Father's kingdom; and it is in this, and not in the material sphere, that individuals and nations display their divergences of character.]]

* ..personal credit was guaranteed in the most summary and extravagant fashion; for the law entitled the creditor to treat his insolvent debtor like a thief, and granted to him in sober earnest by legislative enactment what [[w:Shylock|Shylock]], half in jest, stipulated for from his mortal enemy, guarding indeed by special clauses the point as to cutting off too much more carefully than did the Jew.
** Vol. 1, Pt. 1, Translated by W.P.Dickson
** Character of Roman law in relation to Debt in the Roman Kingdom.

* [the] qualities -those of good soldiers but bad citizens - explain the historical fact, that the celts have shaken states everywhere,but founded none.
** Vol. 1. Translated by W.P.Dicskon

* The strict conception of the unity and omnipotence of the state in all matters pertaining to it, which was the central principle of the Italian constitutions, placed in the hands of the single president nominated for life a formidable power, which was felt doubtless by the enemies of the land, but was not less heavily felt by its citizens. Abuse and oppression could not fail to ensue, and, as a necessary consequence, efforts were made to lessen that power. It was, however, the grand distinction of the endeavours after reform and the revolutions in Rome, that there was no attempt either to impose limitations on the community as such or even to deprive it of corresponding organs of expression—that there never was any endeavour to assert the so-called natural rights of the individual in contradistinction to the community—that, on the contrary, the attack was wholly directed against the form in which the community was represented. '''From the times of the Tarquins down to those of the Gracchi the cry of the party of progress in Rome was not for limitation of the power of the state, but for limitation of the power of the magistrates: nor amidst that cry was the truth ever forgotten, that the people ought not to govern, but to be governed.'''
** Vol. 1. Translated by W.P.Dickson
** Introductory Paragraph to the second part of Volume 1. On the Abolition of the monarchy and the formation of the Republic. The first magistrates of the republic and the conceptualization of the relationship between the magistrates and the body of citizens.

*..'''any revolution or any usurpation is justified before the bar of history by the exclusive ability govern''', even its rigorous judgement must acknowledge that the [[w:Roman Senate|corporation]] duly comprehended and worthily fulfilled its great task.
** Vol. 1. Book II. Chapter 3. Translated by W.P.Dickson.

* After Rome had acquired the undisputed mastery of the world, the Greeks were wont to annoy their Roman masters by the assertion, that Rome was indebted for her greatness to the fever, of which [[w:Alexander the Great|Alexander of Macedon]] died at Babylon on the 11th of June, 323. As it was not very agreeable for them to reflect on the actual past, they were fond of allowing their thoughts to dwell on what might have happened, had the great king turned his arms towards the west, and contested the [[w:Carthage|Carthaginian]] supremacy by sea with his fleet, and the Roman supremacy by land with his phalanxes. It is not impossible that Alexander may have cherished such thoughts; nor is it necessary to resort for such an explanation of their origin to the mere difficulty which an autocrat provided with soldiers and ships experiences in setting limits to his warlike career. It was an enterprise worthy of a great Greek king to protect the siceliots against Carthage and the Tarentines against Rome.. and the Italian embassies from the Bruttians, Lucanians, and Etruscans, that long with numerous others made their appearance at [[w:Babylon|Babylon]], afforded him sufficient opportunities of becoming acquainted with the circumstances of the peninsula, and of contracting relations with it. Carthage with is many connections in the east could not but attract the attention of the mighty monarch, and it was probably part of his design to convert the nominal sovereignty of the Persian king over the Tyrian colony into a real one: the apprehensions of the Carthaginians are shown by the Phoenician spy in the suite of Alexander. Whether, however, those ideas were dreams or actual projects, the king died without having interfered in the affairs of the west, and his ideas were buried with him. For a few brief years a Grecian ruler had held in his hands the whole intellectual vigour of the Hellenic race combined with the whole material resources of the east. On his death the work to which his life had been devoted - the establishment of a Hellenism in the east - was by no means undone; but his empire had barely been united when it was again dismembered, and, admidst the constant quarrels of the different states that were formed out of its ruins, the object of world-wide interest which they were destined to promote - the diffusion of Greek culture in the east - though not abandoned, was prosecuted on a feeble and stunted scale.
** Vol. 1., Page 394 - 395. Translated by W.P.Dickson.

* The earliest achievement of this (of equality and the restriction on the powers of the constitutionally mandated magistrates),  the most ancient opposition in Rome, consisted in the abolition of the life-tenure of the presidency of the community; in other words, in the abolition of the monarchy... Not only in Rome (but all over the Italian peninsula) ... we find the rulers for life of an earlier epoch superseded in after times by annual magistrates. In this light the reasons which led to the substitution of the consuls for kings in Rome need no explanation. The organism of the ancient Greek and Italian polity through its own action and by a sort of natural necessity produced the limitation of the life-presidency to a shortened, and for the most part an annual, term... Simple, however, as was the cause of the change, it might be brought about in various ways, resolution (of the community),.. or the rule might voluntarily abdicate; or the people might rise in rebellion against a tyrannical ruler, and expel him. It was in this latter way that the monarchy was terminated in Rome. For however much the history of the expulsion of the last [[w:Tarquinius Superbus|Tarquinius, &quot;the proud&quot;]], may have been interwoven with anecdotes and spun out into a romance, it is not in its leading outlines to be called in question. Tradition credibly enough indicates as the causes of the revolt, that the king neglected to consult the senate and to complete its numbers; that he pronounced sentences of capital punishment and confiscation without advising with his counsellors(sic); that he accumulated immense stores of grain in his granaries, and exacted from the burgesses military labours and task-work beyond what was due... we are (in light of the ignorance of historical facts around the abolition of the monarchy) fortunately in possession of a clearer light as to the nature of the change which was made in the constitution (after the expulsion of the monarchy). The royal power was by no means abolished, as is shown by the fact that, when a vacancy occurred, a &quot;temporary king&quot; ([[w:Interrex|Interrex]]) was nominated as before. The one life-king was simply replaced by two [one year] kings, who called themselves generals ([[w:praetores|praetores]]), or judges..., or merely colleagues (Consuls) [literally, &quot;[[w:Consuls|Those who leap or dance together]]&quot;]. The collegiate principle, from which this last - and subsequently most current - name of the annual kings was derived, assumed in their case an altogether peculiar form. The supreme power was not entrusted to the two magistrates conjointly, but each consul possessed and exercised it for himself as fully and wholly as it had been possessed and exercised by the king; and, although a partition of functions doubtless took place from the first - the one consul for instance undertaking the command of the army, and the other the administration of justice - that partition was by no means binding, and each of the colleagues was legally at liberty to interfere at any time in the province of the other.
** Vol. 1, Book II , Chapter 1. &quot;Change of the Constitution&quot; Translated by W.P. Dickson

* In [[w:Etruria|Etruria]].. the nation stagnated and decayed in political helplessness and indolent opulence, a theological monopoly in the hands of the nobility, stupid fatalism, wild and meaningless mysticism, the arts of soothsaying and mendicant priestcraft gradually developed themselves, till they reached the height at which we afterwards find them.
**Vol. 1, Book II, Chapter 8. &quot;Law. Religion. Military System. Economic Condition. Nationality&quot;

*'''The force of circumstances... is stronger than even the strongest government''': the language and customs of the Latin people immediately shared (with Rome) its ascendancy in Italy, and already began to undermine the other Italian Nationalities.
**Vol. 1, Book II, Chapter 8. &quot;Law. Religion. Military System. Economic Condition. Nationality&quot;

*'''As the grave closes alike over all whether important or insignificant, so in the roll of Roman magistrates the empty scion of nobility stands undistinguishable by the side of the great statesmen''' [men] who had been at the head of the Roman commonwealth, as well as this Roman statesmen and warrior, might be commemorated as having been of noble birth and of manly beauty, valiant and wise; but there was no more to record [of their lives and deeds]] regarding them... The senator was intended to be no worse and no better then other senators, nor at all to differ from them. It was not necessary and not desirable that any burgess should surpass the rest, whether in showy silver plate and Hellenic culture, or in uncommon wisdom and excellence. The Rome of the period belonged to no individual; it was necessary that the burgesses should all be alike..&quot;
**Vol. 1, Book II, Chapter 8. &quot;Law. Religion. Military System. Economic Condition. Nationality&quot;
** On the lack of individuality in Rome in the first ages of the Republic (in contradistinction with the Hellenic cultures of Greece)

*... He proceeded with his fleet, not to [[Lilybaum]], but to [[Tarentum]]. It was evident, looking to the very germent in the minds of the Sicillians, that he ought first of all to have dislodged the Carthaginians wholly from the island, and thereby to have cut off the discontented from their last support, before eh turned his attention to Italy; in that quarter there was nothing to be lost, for Tarentum was safe enough for him, and the other allies were of little moment now that they had been abandoned. It is conceivable that his soldierly spirit impelled him to wipe off the stain of his not very honerourable departure in the year 476 by a brilliant return, and that his heart bled when he heard the complaints of the Lucanians and Samnites. But problems, such as Pyrrhus had proposed to himself, can only be solved by men of iron nature, who are able to control their feelings of compassion and even their sense of honour; and Pyrrhus was not one of these.
**Vol. 1, Book II, Chapter 7. &quot;Law. Religion. Military System. Economic Condition. Nationality&quot;
** On Pyrrhus of Epirus

=== ''The History of Rome'' - Volume 2 ===
[[File:Mommsen p265.jpg|thumb|190px|''A bust, reputedly of [[w:Hannibal|Hannibal]]''
 He was peculiarly marked by that inventive craftiness, which forms one of the leading traits of the Phoenician character; he was fond of taking singular and unexpected routes; ambushes and stratagems of all sorts were familiar to him; and he studied the character of his antagonists with unprecedented care.  By an unrivalled system of espionage--he had regular spies even in Rome--he kept himself informed of the projects of the enemy; he himself was frequently seen wearing disguises and false hair, in order to procure information on some point or other.  Every page of the history of this period attests his genius in strategy; and his gifts as a statesman]]

* When a war of annihilation is surely though in point of time indefinitely impending over a weaker state, the wiser, more resolute and more devoted men who would immediately prepare it for the unavoidable struggle and thus cover their defensive policy with a strategy of offense always find themselves hampered by the indolent, cowardly mass of the money worshippers, of the aged and feeble,  and the thoughtless who are minded merely to gain time to live and die in peace and to postpone and any price the final struggle.
** The History of Rome, Volume 2 Translated by W.P. Dickson

* On the one hand this catastrophe had brought to light the utterly corrupt and pernicious character of the ruling oligarchy, their incapacity, their coterie-policy, their leanings towards the Romans. On the other hand the seizure of Sardinia, and the threatening attitude which Rome on that occasion assumed, showed plainly even to the humblest that a declaration of war by Rome was constantly hanging like the sword of Damocles over Carthage, and that, if Carthage in her present circumstances went to war with Rome, the consequence must necessarily be the downfall of the Phoenician dominion in Libya. Probably there were in Carthage not a few who, despairing of the future of their country, counselled emigration to the islands of the Atlantic; who could blame them? But '''minds of the nobler order disdain to save themselves apart from their nation, and great natures enjoy the privilege of deriving enthusiasm from circumstances in which the multitude of good men despair.''' They accepted the new conditions just as Rome dictated them; no course was left but to submit and, adding fresh bitterness to their former hatred, carefully to cherish and husband resentment—that last resource of an injured nation. They then took steps towards a political reform.(1) They had become sufficiently convinced of the incorrigibleness of the party in power: the fact that the governing lords had even in the last war neither forgotten their spite nor learned greater wisdom, was shown by the effrontery bordering on simplicity with which they now instituted proceedings against Hamilcar as the originator of the mercenary war, because he had without full powers from the government made promises of money to his Sicilian soldiers. Had the club of officers and popular leaders desired to overthrow this rotten and wretched government, it would hardly have encountered much difficulty in Carthage itself; but it would have met with more formidable obstacles in Rome, with which the chiefs of the government in Carthage already maintained relations that bordered on treason. To all the other difficulties of the position there fell to be added the circumstance, that the means of saving their country had to be created without allowing either the Romans, or their own government with its Roman leanings, to become rightly aware of what was doing.


* The man, whose head and heart had in a desperate emergency and amidst a despairing people paved the way for their deliverance, was no more, when it became possible to carry out his design.  Whether his successor Hasdrubal forbore to make the attack because the proper moment seemed to him to have not yet come, or whether, more a statesman than a general, he believed himself unequal to the conduct of the enterprise, we are unable to determine.  When, at the beginning of [221 B.C], he fell by the hand of an assassin, the Carthaginian officers of the Spanish army summoned to fill his place Hannibal, the eldest son of [[w:Hamilcar|Hamilcar]].  He was still a young man--born in [247 B.C], and now, therefore, in his twenty-ninth year [221 B.C]; but his had already been a life of manifold experience.  His first recollections pictured to him his father fighting in a distant land and conquering on Ercte; he had keenly shared that unconquered father's feelings on the [[w:First Punic War#Peace Terms|Peace of Catulus]] (also see [[Treaty of Lutatius]]), on the bitter return home, and throughout the horrors of the [[w:Mercenary War|Libyan war]].  While yet a boy, he had followed his father to the camp; and he soon distinguished himself.  His light and firmly-knit frame made him an excellent runner and fencer, and a fearless rider at full speed; the privation of sleep did not affect him, and he knew like a soldier how to enjoy or to dispense with food. Although his youth had been spent in the camp, he possessed such culture as belonged to the [[Phoenicians]] of rank in his day; in Greek, apparently after he had become a general, he made such progress under the guidance of his confidant Sosilus of Sparta as to be able to compose state papers in that language.  As he grew up, he entered the army of his father, to perform his first feats of arms under the paternal eye and to see him fall in battle by his side.  Thereafter he had commanded the cavalry under his sister's husband, Hasdrubal, and distinguished himself by brilliant personal bravery as well as by his talents as a leader.  The voice of his comrades now summoned him--the tried, although youthful general--to the chief command, and he could now execute the designs for which his father and his brother-in-law had lived and died.  He took up the inheritance, and he was worthy of it.  His contemporaries tried to cast stains of various sorts on his character; the Romans charged him with cruelty, the Carthaginians with covetousness; and it is true that he hated as only Oriental natures know how to hate, and that a general who never fell short of money and stores can hardly have been other than covetous.  But though anger and envy and meanness have written his history, they have not been able to mar the pure and noble image which it presents.  Laying aside wretched inventions which furnish their own refutation, and some things which his lieutenants, particularly Hannibal Monomachus and Mago the Sammite, were guilty of doing in his name, nothing occurs in the accounts regarding him which may not be justified under the circumstances, and according to the international law, of the times; and all agree in this, that he combined in rare perfection discretion and enthusiasm, caution and energy.  He was peculiarly marked by that inventive craftiness, which forms one of the leading traits of the Phoenician character; he was fond of taking singular and unexpected routes; ambushes and stratagems of all sorts were familiar to him; and he studied the character of his antagonists with unprecedented care.  By an unrivaled system of espionage--he had regular spies even in Rome--he kept himself informed of the projects of the enemy; he himself was frequently seen wearing disguises and false hair, in order to procure information on some point or other.  Every page of the history of this period attests his genius in strategy; and his gifts as a statesman were, after the peace with Rome, no less conspicuously displayed in his reform of the Carthaginian constitution, and in the unparalleled influence which as a foreign exile he exercised in the cabinets of the eastern powers.  The power which he wielded over men is shown by his incomparable control over an army of various nations and many tongues--an army which never in the worst times mutinied against him.  He was a great man; wherever he went, he riveted the eyes of all.
** The History of Rome, Volume 2 Translated by W.P. Dickson
** On Hannibal the man and soldier

* All the [[w:Hellenistic States|Hellenistic States]] had thus been completely subjected to the protectorate of Rome, and the whole empire of Alexander the Great had fallen to the Roman commonwealth just as if the city had inherited it from his heirs. From all sides kings and ambassadors flocked to Rome to congratulate her; they showed that fawning is never more abject than when kings are in the antechamber...[[w:Polybius]] dates from the battle of Pydna the full establishment of the universal empire of Rome. It was in fact the last battle in which a civilized state confronted Rome in the field on a footing of equality with her as a great power; all subsequent struggles were rebellions or wars with peoples beyond the pale of the Romano-Greek civilization -- with barbarians, as they were called. The whole civilized world thenceforth recognized in the Roman senate the supreme tribunal, whose commissions decided in the last resort between kings and nations; and to acquire its language and manners foreign princes and youths of quality resided in Rome. A clear and earnest attempt to get rid of this dominion was in reality made only once -- by the great [[w:Mithradates of Pontus|Mithradates of Pontus]]. The battle of Pydna, moreover, marks the last occasion on which the senate still adhered to the state-maxim that that they should, if possible, hold no possessions and maintain no garrisons beyond the Italian seas, but should keep the numerous states dependent on them in order by a mere political supremacy. The aim aim of their policy was that these states should neither decline into utter weakness and anarchy, as had nevertheless happened in Greece nor emerge out of their half-free position into complete independence, as Macedonia had attempted to do without success. No state was to be allowed to utterly perish, but no one was to be permitted to stand on its own resources... Indications of a change of system, and of an increasing disinclination on the part of Rome to tolerate by its side intermediate states even in such independence as was possible for them, were clearly given in the destruction of the Macedonian monarchy after the battle of Pydna, the more and more frequent and more unavoidable the intervention in the internal affairs of the petty Greek states through their misgovernment, and their political and social anarchy, the disarming of Macedonia, where the Northern forntier at any rate urgently required a defence different from that of mere posts; and, lastly, the introduction of the payment of land-tax to Rome from Macedonia and [[w:Illyria|Illyria]], were so many symptoms of the approaching conversion of the client states into subjects of Rome.
**The Changing of the Relationship between Rome and Her Client-States
** The History Of Rome, Volume 2. Chapter 10. &quot;The Third Macedonian War&quot; Translated by W.P.Dickson

*... in truth Publius Scipio was one, who was himself enthusiastic, and who inspired enthusiasm. He was not one of the few who by their energy and iron will constrain the world to adopt, and to move in, new paths for centuries, or who grasp the reins of destiny for years till its wheels roll over them.... a wide interval separates such a man from an Alexander or a Caesar. As an officer, he rendered at least no greater service to his country than [[w:Marcus Claudius Marcellus (consul 196 BC)|Marcus Marcellus]]; and as a politician, although not perhaps himself fully conscious of the unpatriotic and personal character of his policy, he injured hi country at least as much, as he benefited it by his military skill.
** ** The History Of Rome, Volume 2. Chapter 6.  Translated by W.P.Dickson

[[File:Escipión africano.JPG|thumb|165px|''Bust of [[w:Scipio Africanus|Scipio Africanus]]'' He was not one of the few who by their energy and iron will constrain the world to adopt, and to move in, new paths for centuries, or who grasp the reins of destiny for years till its wheels roll over them]]

* The fall of the patriciate by no means divested the Roman commonwealth of its aristocratic character. We have already indicated that the plebeian party carried within it that character from the first as well as, and in some sense still more decidedly than, the patriciate; for, while in the old body of burgesses an absolute equality of rights prevailed, the new constitution set out from a distinction between the senatorial houses who were privileged in point of burgess rights and of burgess [[w:usufructs|usufructs]], and the mass of the other citizens. Immediately, therefore, on the abolition of the patriciate and the formal establishment of civic equality, a new aristocracy and a corresponding opposition were formed; and we have already shown how the former engrafted itself as it were on the fallen patriciate, and how, accordingly, the first movements of the new party of progress were mixed up with the last movements of the old opposition between the orders. The formation of these new parties began in the fifth century, but they assumed their definite shape only in the century which followed. The development of this internal change is, as it were, drowned amidst the noise of the great wars and victories, and not merely so, but the process of formation is in this case more withdrawn from view than any other in Roman history. Like a crust of ice gathering imperceptibly over the surface of a stream and imperceptibly confining it more and more, this new Roman aristocracy silently arose; and not less imperceptibly, like the current concealing itself beneath and slowly extending, there arose in opposition to it the new party of progress. It is very difficult to sum up in a general historical view the several, individually insignificant, traces of these two antagonistic movements, which do not for the present yield their historical product in any distinct actual catastrophe. But the freedom hitherto enjoyed in the commonwealth was undermined, and the foundation for future revolutions was laid, during this epoch; and the delineation of these as well as of the development of Rome in general would remain imperfect, if we should fail to give some idea of the strength of that encrusting ice, of the growth of the current beneath, and of the fearful moaning and cracking that foretold the mighty breaking up which was at hand. The Roman nobility attached itself, in form, to earlier institutions belonging to the times of the patriciate. Persons who once had filled the highest ordinary magistracies of the state not only, as a matter of course, practically enjoyed all along a higher honour, but also had at an early period certain honorary privileges associated with their position. The most ancient of these was doubtless the permission given to the descendants of such magistrates to place the wax images of these illustrious ancestors after their death in the family hall, along the wall where the pedigree was painted, and to have these images carried, on occasion of the death of members of the family, in the funeral procession.. the honouring of images was regarded in the Italo-Hellenic view as unrepublican, and on that account the Roman state-police did not at all tolerate the exhibition of effigies of the living, and strictly superintended that of effigies of the dead. With this privilege were associated various external insignia, reserved by law or custom for such magistrates and their descendants:--the golden finger-ring of the men, the silver-mounted trappings of the youths, the purple border on the toga and the golden amulet-case of the boys--trifling matters, but still important in a community where civic equality even in external appearance was so strictly adhered to, and where, even during the second Punic war, a burgess was arrested and kept for years in prison because he had appeared in public, in a manner not sanctioned by law, with a garland of roses upon his head.(6) These distinctions may perhaps have already existed partially in the time of the patrician government, and, so long as families of higher and humbler rank were distinguished within the patriciate, may have served as external insignia for the former; but they certainly only acquired political importance in consequence of the change of constitution in 387, by which the plebeian families that attained the consulate were placed on a footing of equal privilege with the patrician families, all of whom were now probably entitled to carry images of their ancestors. Moreover, it was now settled that the offices of state to which these hereditary privileges were attached should include neither the lower nor the extraordinary magistracies nor the tribunate of the plebs, but merely the consulship, the praetorship which stood on the same level with it,(7) and the curule aedileship, which bore a part in the administration of public justice and consequently in the exercise of the sovereign powers of the state.(8) Although this plebeian nobility, in the strict sense of the term, could only be formed after the curule offices were opened to plebeians, yet it exhibited in a short time, if not at the very first, a certain compactness of organization--doubtless because such a nobility had long been prefigured in the old senatorial plebeian families. The result of the Licinian laws in reality therefore amounted nearly to what we should now call the creation of a batch of peers. Now that the plebeian families ennobled by their curule ancestors were united into one body with the patrician families and acquired a distinctive position and distinguished power in the commonwealth, the Romans had again arrived at the point whence they had started; there was once more not merely a governing aristocracy and a hereditary nobility--both of which in fact had never disappeared--but there was a governing hereditary nobility, and the feud between the gentes in possession of the government and the commons rising in revolt against the gentes could not but begin afresh. And matters very soon reached that stage. The nobility was not content with its honorary privileges which were matters of comparative indifference, but strove after separate and sole political power, and sought to convert the most important institutions of the state--the senate and the equestrian order--from organs of the commonwealth into organs of the plebeio-patrician aristocracy.

*The Romans of this epoch still remained strangers to rhetoric and philosophy.  The speech in their case lay too decidedly at the very heart of public life to be accessible to the handling of the foreign schoolmaster; the genuine orator Cato poured forth all the vials of his indignant ridicule over the silly Isocratean fashion of ever learning, and yet never being able, to speak.  The Greek philosophy, although it acquired a certain influence over the Romans through the medium of didactic and especially of tragic poetry, was nevertheless
viewed with an apprehension compounded of boorish ignorance and of instinctive misgiving.  Cato bluntly called Socrates a talker and a revolutionist, who was justly put to death as an offender against the faith and the laws of his country; and the opinion, which even Romans addicted to philosophy entertained regarding it..
** ** The History Of Rome, Volume 2. Chapter 9.  Translated by W.P.Dickson

*History has a Nemesis for every sin—for an impotent craving after freedom, as well as for an injudicious generosity.


*The party of reform emerges, as it were, personified in Marcus Porcius Cato (520-605).  Cato, the last statesman of note belonging to that earlier system which restricted its ideas to Italy and was averse to universal empire, was for that reason accounted in after times the model of a genuine Roman of the antique stamp; he may with greater justice be regarded as the representative of the opposition of the Roman middle class to the new Hellenico-cosmopolite nobility.  Brought up at the plough, he was induced to enter on a political career by the
owner of a neighbouring estate, one of the few nobles who kept aloof from the tendencies of the age, Lucius Valerius Flaccus.  That upright patrician deemed the rough Sabine farmer the proper man to stem the current of the times; and he was not deceived in his estimate. Beneath the aegis of Flaccus, and after the good old fashion serving his fellow-citizens and the commonwealth in counsel and action, Cato fought his way up to the consulate and a triumph, and even to the censorship.  Having in his seventeenth year entered the burgess-army,
he had passed through the whole Hannibalic war from the battle on the Trasimene lake to that of Zama; had served under Marcellus and Fabius, under Nero and Scipio; and at Tarentum and Sena, in Africa, Sardinia, Spain, and Macedonia, had shown himself capable as a soldier, a staff-officer, and a general.  He was the same in the Forum, as in the
battle-field.  His prompt and fearless utterance, his rough but pungent rustic wit, his knowledge of Roman law and Roman affairs, his incredible activity and his iron frame, first brought him into notice in the neighbouring towns; and, when at length he made his appearance on the greater arena of the Forum and the senate-house in the capital, constituted him the most influential advocate and political orator of his time.  He took up the key-note first struck by Manius Curius, his ideal among Roman statesmen;(50) throughout his long life he made it his task honestly, to the best of his judgment, to assail on all hands the prevailing declension; and even in his eighty-fifth year he battled in the Forum with the new spirit of the times.  He was anything but comely--he had green eyes, his enemies alleged, and red hair--and he was not a great man, still less a far-seeing statesman. Thoroughly narrow in his political and moral views, and having the ideal of the good old times always before his eyes and on his lips, he cherished an obstinate contempt for everything new.  Deeming himself
by virtue of his own austere life entitled to manifest an unrelenting severity and harshness towards everything and everybody; upright and honourable, but without a glimpse of any duty lying beyond the sphere of police order and of mercantile integrity; an enemy to all villany and vulgarity as well as to all refinement and geniality, and above all things the foe of his foes; he never made an attempt to stop evils at their source, but waged war throughout life against symptoms, and especially against persons.  The ruling lords, no doubt, looked down
with a lofty disdain on the ignoble growler, and believed, not without reason, that they were far superior; but fashionable corruption in and out of the senate secretly trembled in the presence of the old censor of morals with his proud republican bearing, of the scar-covered veteran from the Hannibalic war, and of the highly influential senator and the idol of the Roman farmers.  He publicly laid before his noble colleagues, one after another, his list of their sins; certainly without being remarkably particular as to the proofs, and certainly
also with a peculiar relish in the case of those who had personally crossed or provoked him.  With equal fearlessness he reproved and publicly scolded the burgesses for every new injustice and every fresh disorder.  His vehement attacks provoked numerous enemies, and he lived in declared and irreconcilable hostility with the most powerful aristocratic coteries of the time, particularly the Scipios and Flaminini; he was publicly accused forty-four times.  But the farmers --and it is a significant indication how powerful still in the Roman
middle class was the spirit which had enabled them to survive the day of Cannae--never allowed the unsparing champion of reform to lack the support of their votes.  Indeed when in 570 Cato and his like-minded patrician colleague, Lucius Flaccus, solicited the censorship, and announced beforehand that it was their intention when in that office to undertake a vigorous purification of the burgess-body through all its ranks, the two men so greatly dreaded were elected by the burgesses notwithstanding all the exertions of the nobility; and the latter were obliged to submit, while the great purgation actually took place and erased among others the brother of Africanus from the roll of the equites, and the brother of the deliverer of the Greeks from the roll of the senate.
[[File:Marco Porcio Caton Major.jpg|thumb|190px|he was not a great man, still less a far-seeing statesman. Thoroughly narrow in his political and moral views, and having the ideal of the good old times always before his eyes and on his lips, he cherished an obstinate contempt for everything new.  Deeming himself
by virtue of his own austere life entitled to manifest an unrelenting severity and harshness towards everything and everybody; upright and honourable, but without a glimpse of any duty lying beyond the sphere of police order and of mercantile integrity; an enemy to all villany and vulgarity as well as to all refinement and geniality, and above all things the foe of his foes; he never made an attempt to stop evils at their source, but waged war throughout life against symptoms, and especially against persons.  The ruling lords, no doubt, looked down
with a lofty disdain on the ignoble growler, and believed, not without reason, that they were far superior; but fashionable corruption in and out of the senate secretly trembled in the presence of the old censor of morals with his proud republican bearing, of the scar-covered veteran from the Hannibalic war, and of the highly influential senator and the idol of the Roman farmers.]]

=== ''The History of Rome'' - Volume 3 ===
* On the abolition of the Macedonian monarchy, the supremacy of Rome was not only an established fact from the [[w:Pillars of Hercules|Pillars of Hercules]] to the mouths of the [[Nile]] and the [[w:Orontes River|Orontes]], but, as if it were the final decree of fate, pressed on the nations with all the weight of an inevitable necessity, and seemed to leave them merely the choice of perishing in hopeless resistance or in hopeless endurance. If history were not entitled to insist that the earnest reader should accompany her through good and evil days, through landscapes of winter as well as of spring, the historian might be tempted to shun the cheerless task of tracing the manifold and yet monotonous turns of this struggle between power and weakness, both in the Spanish provinces already annexed to the Roman empire and in the African, Hellenic, and the Asiatic territories which were still treated as clients of Rome. But, however unimportant and subordinate the individual conflicts may appear, they possess collectively a deep historical significance; and, in particular, the state of things in Italy at this period is only intelligible in the light of the reaction which the provinces exercised over the mother-country.
** Vol. 3, pg. 1, translated by W.P. Dickson

[[File:Theodor Mommsen outdoors.jpg|thumb|right|The highest revelations of humanity are perishable; the religion once true may become a lie, the polity once fraught with blessing may become a curse; but even the gospel that is past still finds confessors, and if such a faith cannot remove mountains like faith in the living truth, it yet remains true to itself down to its very end, and does not depart from the realm of the living till it has dragged its last priest and its last partisans along with it, and a new generation, freed from those shadows of the past and the perishing, rules over a world that has renewed its youth.]]
*An independent state does not pay too dear for its independence in accepting the sufferings of war when it cannot avoid them
** Vol. 3, pg. 20, translated by W.P. Dickson

* '''It is no easy task for a state any more than for a man to become reconciled to insignificance'''; it is the duty and right of the ruler either to renounce his authority, or by the display of an imposing material superiority to compel the ruled to resignation. 
** Vol. 3, pg. 21, translated by W.P. Dickson

* . 
** Vol. 3, pg. 21, translated by W.P. Dickson


* For a whole generation after the [[w:Battle of Pydna|battle of Pydna]] the Roman state enjoyed a profound calm, scarcely varied by a ripple here and there on the surface. Its dominion extended over three continents; the lustre of the Roman power and the glory of the Roman name were constantly on the increase; all eyes rested on Italy, all talents and all riches flowed thither; it seemed as if a golden age of peaceful prosperity and intellectual enjoyment of life had there begun. The Orientals of this period told each other with astonishment of the might republic of the West,'which subdued kingdoms far and near, so that everyone who heard its name trembled; but which kept good faith with its friends and clients. Such was the glory of the Romans, and yet no one usurped the crown and no one glittered in purple dress; but they obeyed whomsoever from year to year they made their master, and there was among them neither envy nor discord.'So it seemed at a distance; matters wore a different aspect on a closer view. The government of the aristocracy was in full train to destroy its own work. '''Not that the sons and grandsons of the vanquished at [[w:Cannae|Cannae]] and [[w:Zama|Zama]] had so utterly degenerated from their fathers and grandfathers; the difference was not so much in the men who now sat in the Senate as in the times. Where a limited number of old families of established wealth and hereditary political importance conducts the government, it will display in seasons of danger an incomparable tenacity of purpose and power of heroic self-sacrifice, just as in seasons of tranquility it will be short-sighted, selfish, and negligent; the germs of both results are essentially involved in its hereditary and collegiate character. The morbid matter had been long in existence, but it needed the sun of prosperity to develop it.''' There was a profound meaning in the question of [[Cato]], &quot;What was to become of Rome, when she should no longer have any state to fear?&quot; that point had now been reached. Every neighbor whom she might have feared was politically annihilated; and of the men, who had been reared under the older order of things in the severe school of the [[w:Second Punic War|Hannibalic War]], and whose words still sounded as echoes of that mighty epoch so long as they survived, death called on after another away, till at length the voice of the last of them, the Veteran Cato, ceased to be heard in the Senate-house and in the Forum. A younger generation came to the helm, and their policy was a sorry answer to that of the question of the veteran patriot. We have already spoken the shape which the government of the subjects and external policy of rome assumed in their hands. '''In internal affairs they were, if possible, still more disposed to let the ship drive before the wind: if we understand by internal government more than the transaction of current business, there was at this period no government in Rome at all.''' The single leading thought of the governing corporation was the maintenance and, if possible, the increase of their usurped privileges. It was not the state that had a title to get the right and the best man for its supreme magistracy; but every member of the coterie had an inborn title to the highest office of the state - a title not to be prejudiced by the unfair rivalry of his peers or by the encroachments of the excluded. Accordingly the clique proposed to itself as its most important political aim, the restriction of reelection to the consulship and the exclusion of &quot;new men;&quot; and in fact succeeded in obtaining the legal prohibition of the former about (165) and contented itself with a government of aristocratic nobodies. Even the inaction of the government in its outward relations was doubtless connected with this policy of the nobility, exclusive towards commoners, and distrustful towards the individual members of their own order. By no surer means could they keep commoners, whose deeds were their patent of nobility, aloof from the pure circles of the aristocracy than by giving no opportunity to any one to perform deeds at all...
** Vol 3, Pg 71-73, Translated by W.P. Dickson
** On the Roman government before the Ghracci brothers and the spread of decay within it.

[[File:Marius Glyptothek Munich 319.jpg|thumb|He knew neither the art of gaining his antagonists, nor that of keeping his own party in subjection. ''Bust of Gaius Marius'']]

* With unrivalled activity.. [he] concentrated the most varied and most complicated functions of government in his own person. He himself watched over the distribution of grain, selected the jurymen, founded the colonies.. regulated the highways and concluded building-contracts, led the discussions of the senate, settled the consular elections - in short; he accustomed the people to the fact that one man was the foremost in all things, and threw the lax and lame administration of the senatorial college into the shade by the vigour and dexterity of his personal rule.
** Vol. 3, Translated by W.P. Dickson.
** On Gaius Gracchus.

*Philip of Macedonia leading the way, were induced to interfere in the relations of the west.  We have already set forth to some extent the origin of this interference and the course of the first Macedonian war (540-549); and we have pointed out what Philip might have accomplished during the second Punic war, and how little of all that Hannibal was entitled to expect and to count on was really fulfilled.  A fresh illustration had been afforded of the truth, that of all haphazards none is more hazardous than an absolute hereditary monarchy.  Philip was not the man whom Macedonia at that time required; yet his gifts were far from insignificant He was a genuine king, in the best and worst sense of the term.  A strong desire to rule in person and unaided was the fundamental trait of his character; he was proud of his purple, but he was no less proud of other gifts, and he had reason to be so.  He not only showed the valour of a soldier and the eye of a general, but he displayed a high spirit in the conduct of public affairs, whenever his Macedonian sense of honour was offended.  Full of intelligence and wit, he won the hearts of all whom he wished to gain, especially of the men who were ablest and most refined, such as Flamininus and Scipio; he was a pleasant boon companion and, not by virtue of his rank alone, a dangerous wooer. But he was at the same time one of the most arrogant and flagitious characters, which that shameless age produced.  He was in the habit of saying that he feared none save the gods; but it seemed almost as if his gods were those to whom his admiral Dicaearchus regularly offered sacrifice--Godlessness (-Asebeia-) and Lawlessness (-Paranomia-).  '''The lives of his advisers and of the promoters of his schemes possessed no sacredness in his eyes, nor did he disdain to pacify his indignation against the Athenians and Attalus by the destruction of venerable monuments and illustrious works of art; it is quoted as one of his maxims of state, that &quot;whoever causes the father to be put to death
must also kill the sons.&quot;  It may be that to him cruelty was not, strictly, a delight; but he was indifferent to the lives and sufferings of others, and relenting, which alone renders men tolerable, found no place in his hard and stubborn heart.  So abruptly and harshly did he proclaim the principle that no promise and no moral law are binding on an absolute king, that he thereby interposed the most serious obstacles to the success of his plans.  No one can deny that he possessed sagacity and resolution, but these were, in a singular manner, combined with procrastination and supineness; which is perhaps partly to be explained by the fact, that he was called in his eighteenth year to the position of an absolute sovereign, and that his ungovernable fury against every one who disturbed his autocratic course by counter-argument or counter-advice scared away from him all independent counsellors.'''  What various causes cooperated to produce the weak and disgraceful management which he showed in the first Macedonian war, we cannot tell; it may have been due perhaps to that indolent arrogance which only puts forth its full energies against danger when it becomes imminent, or perhaps to his indifference towards a plan which was not of his own devising and his jealousy of the greatness of Hannibal which put him to shame.  It is certain that his subsequent conduct betrayed no further trace of the Philip, through whose negligence the plan of Hannibal suffered shipwreck.
** On [[Phillip V of Macedonia|Phillip V of Macedonia]] 

* Of greater importance than this regulation of African clientship were the political consequences of the Jugurthine war or rather of the Jugurthine insurrection, although these have been frequently estimated too highly.  Certainly all the evils of the government were therein brought to light in all their nakedness; it was now not merely notorious but, so to speak, judicially established, that among the governing lords of Rome everything was treated as venal--the treaty of peace and the right of intercession, the rampart of the camp and the life of the soldier; the African had said no more than the simple truth, when on his departure from Rome he declared that, if he had only gold enough, he would undertake to buy the city itself. But the whole external and internal government of this period bore the same stamp of miserable baseness.  In our case the accidental fact, that the war in Africa is brought nearer to us by means of better accounts than the other contemporary military and political events, shifts the true perspective; contemporaries learned by these revelations nothing but what everybody knew long before and every intrepid patriot had long been in a position to support by facts. The circumstance, however, that they were now furnished with some fresh, still stronger and still more irrefutable, proofs of the baseness of the restored senatorial government--a baseness only surpassed by its incapacity--might have been of importance, had there been an opposition and a public opinion with which the government would have found it necessary to come to terms.  But this war had in fact exposed the corruption of the government no less than it had revealed the utter nullity of the opposition.  It was not possible to govern worse than the restoration governed in the years 637-645; it was not possible to stand forth more defenceless and forlorn than was the Roman senate in 645: had there been in Rome a real opposition, that is to say, a party which wished and urged a fundamental alteration of the constitution, it must necessarily have now made at least an attempt to overturn the restored senate.  No such attempt took place; the political question was converted into a personal one, the generals were changed, and one or two useless and unimportant people were banished.  It was thus settled, that the so-called popular party as such neither could nor would govern; that only two forms of government were at all possible in Rome, a -tyrannis- or an oligarchy; that, so long as there happened to be nobody sufficiently well known, if not sufficiently important, to usurp the regency of the state, the worst mismanagement endangered at the most individual oligarchs, but never the oligarchy; that on the other hand, so soon as such a pretender appeared, nothing was easier than to shake the rotten curule chairs.  In this respect the coming forward of Marius was significant, just because it was in itself so utterly unwarranted. If the burgesses had stormed the senate-house after the defeat of Albinus, it would have been a natural, not to say a proper course; but after the turn which Metellus had given to the Numidian war, nothing more could be said of mismanagement, and still less of danger to the commonwealth, at least in this respect; and yet the first ambitious officer who turned up succeeded in doing that with which the older Africanus had once threatened the government,(16) and procured for himself one of the principal military commands against the distinctly- expressed will of the governing body.  Public opinion, unavailing in the hands of the so-called popular party, became an irresistible weapon in the hands of the future king of Rome.  We do not mean to say
that Marius intended to play the pretender, at least at the time when he canvassed the people for the supreme command in Africa; but, whether he did or did not understand what he was doing, there was evidently an end of the restored aristocratic government when the comitial machine began to make generals, or, which was nearly the same thing, when every popular officer was able in legal fashion to nominate himself as general.  Only one new element emerged in these preliminary crises; this was the introduction of military men and of military power into the political revolution.  Whether the coming forward of Marius would be the immediate prelude of a new attempt to supersede the oligarchy by the -tyrannis-, or whether it would, as in various similar cases, pass away without further consequence as an isolated encroachment on the prerogative of the government, could not yet be determined; but it could well be foreseen that, if these rudiments of a second -tyrannis- should attain any development, it was not a statesman like Gaius Gracchus, but an officer that would become its head.  The contemporary reorganization of the military system--which Marius introduced when, in forming his army destined for Africa, he disregarded the property-qualification hitherto required, and allowed even the poorest burgess, if he was otherwise serviceable, to enter the legion as a volunteer--may have been projected by its author on purely military grounds; but it was none the less on that account a momentous political event, that the army was no longer, as formerly, composed of those who had much, no longer even, as in the most recent times, composed of those who had something, to lose, but became gradually converted into a host of people who had nothing but their arms and what the general bestowed on them.  The aristocracy ruled in 650 just as absolutely as in 620; but the signs of the impending catastrophe had multiplied, and on the political horizon the sword had begun to appear by the side of the crown.
** Vol. 3, pg 163, Translated by W.P. Dickson.

* &quot;...public opinion justly recognized in both, above all things, the bankruptcy of the government,which, in its progressive development placed in jeopardy first the honour and now the very existence of the state.'''People just as little deceived themselves then as now regarding the true seat of the evil, but as little now as then did they make even an attempt to apply the remedy at the proper point. They saw well that the system was to blame; but this time also they adhered to the method of calling individuals to account.  '''&quot;
** Vol. 3, Pg, 185, translated by W.P.Dickson
[[File:Theodor Mommsen outdoors.jpg|thumb|since that time the simple civil and moral organization of a great agricultural city had been succeeded by the social antagonisms of a capital of many nations, and by that demoralization in which the prince and the beggar meet]]

*Once more Rome stood on the verge of that abyss, into which the despairing debtor drags his creditor along with him. But since that time the simple civil and moral organization of a great agricultural city had been succeeded by the social antagonisms of a capital of many nations, and by that demoralization in which the prince and the beggar meet; now everything had come to be on a braoder, more abrupt, and fearfully grander scale. When the social war brought all the political and social elements fermenting among the citizens into collision with each other, it laid the foundation for a new revolution.
** Vol. 3, pg. 259, Translated by W.P. Dickson

* '''Revolutions have nowhere ended, and least of all in ROme, without demanding a certain number of victims, who under forms more or less borrowed from justice atone fro the fault of defeat as though it were a crime.'''
** Vol. 3, Pg. 268, Translated by W.P. Dickson

[[File:Gaius Gracchus Tribune of the People.jpg|thumb|250px|''[[w:Gaius Grachuss|Gaius Grachuss]] addressing the [[w:Concilium Plebis|Concilium Plebis]].'' 
* He accustomed the people to the fact that one man was the foremost in all things, and threw the lax and lame administration of the senatorial college into the shade by the vigour and dexterity of his personal rule.]]

** '''He knew neither the art of gaining his antagonists, nor that of keeping his own party in subjection'''
** Vol. 3, Translated by W.P. Dickson.
** On Gaius Marius

* He (Gauis Gracchus) was a political incendiary. Not only was the [[w:Crisis of the Roman Republic|hundred years' revolution]] which dates from him, so far as it was one man's work, the work of Gaius Gracchus, '''but he was above all the true founder of that terrible civic proletariat flattered and paid by the classes above it, which was through it aggregation in the capital - the natural consequence of the largesses of corn - at once utterly demoralized and made conscious of its power, and which - with its pretensions, sometimes stupid, sometimes knavish, and its talk of the sovereignty of the people - lay like an incubus for five hundred years upon the Roman commonwealth and only perished along with it.''' And yet again, this greatest of political transgressors was the regenerator of his country. There is scarce a fruitful idea in Roman monarchy, which is not traceable to Gaius Gracchus.

* It is true that to one who was a rustic and a soldier the political proceedings of the capital were strange and incongruous: he spoke as ill as he commanded well, and displayed a far firmer bearing in the presence of the lances and swords of the enemy than in presence of the applause or hisses of the multitude; but his inclinations were of little moment. The hopes of which he was the object constrained him.
** Vol. 3, translated by W.P.Dickson
** on [[Gaius Marius]]

=== ''The History of Rome'' - Volume 4: Part 1 ===
*Viriathus, now recognized as lord and king of all the Lusitanians, knew how to combine the full dignity of his princely position with the homely habits of a shepherd. No badge distinguished him from the common soldier: he rose from the richly adorned marriage- table of his father-in-law, the prince Astolpa in Roman Spain, without having touched the golden plate and the sumptuous fare, lifted his bride on horseback, and rode back with her to his mountains. He never took more of the spoil than the share which he allotted to each of his comrades. The soldier recognized the general simply by his tall figure, by his striking sallies of wit, and above all by the fact that he surpassed every one of his men in temperance as well as in toil, sleeping always in full armour and fighting in front of all in battle. It seemed as if in that thoroughly prosaic age one of the Homeric heroes had reappeared: the name of Viriathus resounded far and wide through Spain; and the brave nation conceived that in him it had at length found the man who was destined to break the fetters of alien domination.

* When [[w:Sulla|Sulla]] died in the year [78 B.C.], the oligarchy which he had restored ruled with absolute sway over the Roman state; but, as it had been established by force, it still needed force to maintain its ground against its numerous secret and open foes. it was opposed not by any single party with objects clearly expressed and under leaders distinctly acknowledged, but by a mass of multifarious elements, ranging themselves doubtless under the general name of the popular party, but in reality opposing the Sullan organization of the commonwealth on very various grounds and with very different designs...There were... the numerous and important classes whom the sullan restoration had left unsatisfied, or whom the political or private interest it had directly injured. Among those who for such reasons belonged to the opposition ranked the dense and prosperous population of the region between the Po and the [[w:Alps|Alps]], which naturally regarded the bestowal of [[w:Latin Rights|Latin rights]] in [89 B.C.] as merely an installment of the full Roman franchise, and so afforded a ready soil for agitation. To this category belonged also the freedman, influential in numbers and wealth, and specially dangerous through their aggregation in the capital, who could not brook their having been reduced by the restoration to their earlier, practically useless, suffrage. In the same position stood, moreover, the great capitalists, who maintained a cautious silence, but still as before preserved their tenacity of resentment and their equal tenacity of power. The populace of the capital, which recognized true freedom in free bread-corn, was likewise discontented. Still deeper exasperation prevailed among the burgess bodies affected by the Sullan confiscations - whether they, like those of Pompeii, lived on their property curtailed by the Sullan colonists, within the same ring-wall with the latter, and at perpetual variance with them; or, like the Arrentines and Volaterrans, retained actual possession of their territory, but had the Damocles' sword of confiscation suspended over them by the Roman people..
** Vol. 4, Part: 1. Translated by W.P. Dickson.

*In the opposition proper, both among the liberal conservatives and among the Populares, the storms of revution had made fearful havoc.... In the 'democractic' party , among the rising youth, Gaius Julius Caesar, who was twenty-four years of age (born 12 July 102 B.C.) drew  towards him the eyes of friend and foe. His relationship with [[w:Marius|Marius]] and [[w:Cinna|Cinna]] (his father's sister had been the wife of Marius, he himself had married Cinna's daughter); the courageous refusal of the youth who had scrace outgrown the age of boyhood to send a divorce to his young wife cornelia at the biddining of the [[w:Sulla|Dictator]], as P(ompeius had in the like case done; his bold persistence in the priesthood conferred upon him by Marius, but revoked by Sulla; his wanderings during the proscription with which he was threatened, and which was with difficulty 

* Let us look back on the events which fill up the ten years of the Sullan restoration. No one of the movements, external or internal, which occurred during this period - neither the insurrection of Lepidus, nor the enterprises of the Spanish emigrants, nor the wars in Thrace and Macedonia and in Asia Minor, nor the risings of the pirates and the slaves - constituted of itself a mighty danger necessarily affecting the vital sinews of the nation; and yet the state had in all these struggles well-night fought for its very existence. The reason was that the tasks were left everywhere unperformed, so long as they might still have been performed with ease; the neglect of the simplest precautionary measures produced the most dreadful mischiefs and misfortunes, and transformed dependent classes and impotent kings into antagonists on a footing of equality. The [[w:populares|democracy]] and the servile insurrection were doubtless subdued; but such as the victories were, the victor was neither inwardly elevated nor outwardly strengthened by them. It was no credit to Rome, that the two most celebrated generals of the government party had during a struggle of eight years marked by more defeats than victories failed to master the insurgent chief Sertorius and his Spanish guerrillas, and that it was only the dagger of his friends that decided the Sertorian war in favour[sic] of the legitimate government. As to the slaves, it was far less an honour[sic] to have confronted them in equal strive for years. Little more than a century had elapsed since the [[w:Second Punic War|Hannibalic war]]; it must have brought a blush to the cheek of the honourable[sic] Roman, when he reflected on the fearfully rapid decline of the nation since that great age. Then the (the Roman) Italian slaves stood like a wall against the veterans of [[w:Hannibal|Hannibal]]; now the Italian militia were scattered like chaff before the bludgeons of their runaway serfs. Then every plain captain acted in case of need as general, and fought often without success, but always with honour, not it was difficult to find among all the officers of rank a leader of even ordinary efficiency. Then the government preferred to take the last farmer from the plough rather than forgo the acquisition of Spain and Greece; now they were on the eve of again abandoning both regions long since acquired, merely that they might be able to defend themselves against the insurgent slaves at home. [[w:Spartacus|Spartacus]] too as well as Hannibal had traversed Italy with an army from the [[w:Po|Po]] to the [[w:Sicilian Straights|Sicilian Straights]], beaten both consuls, and threatened Rome with a blockade; the enterprise which had needed the greatest general of antiquity to conduct it against the Rome of former days could be undertaken against the Rome of the present by a daring captain of banditti. Was there any wonder that no fresh life sprang out of such victories over insurgents and robber-chiefs?
** Vol. 4, Pt. 1, Chapter 2. &quot;Rule of the Sullan Restoration&quot;
** The Government of the Restoration as a Whole

* [[w:Catilina|Catilina]] in particular was one of the most nefarious men in that nefarious age. His villanies belong to the criminal records, not to history; but his very outward appearance - the pale countenance, the wild glance, the gait by turns sluggish and hurried - betrayed his dismal past. He possessed in a high degree the qualities which are required in the leader of such a band - the faculty of enjoying all pleasures and of bearing all privations, courage, military talent, knowledge of men, the energy of a felon, and that horrible mastery of vice which knows how to bring the weak to fall, and how to train the fallen to crime.
** Vol. 4, Pt. 1, Translated by W.P. Dickson
** On the Praetor Lucius Catilina

[[File:Tiberius Gracchus.jpg|thumb|''Image of [[w:Tiberius Grachuss|Tiberius Gracchus]]'' 
* There are no set forms of high treason in history; whoever provokes one power in the state to conflict with another is certainly a revolutionist, but he may at the same time be a sagacious and praiseworthy statesman. ]]*He [[w:Sertorious|Sertorius]] regarded his army as a Roman one, and filled the officers' posts, without exception, with Romans. With reference to the Spaniards he was the governor, who by virtue of his office levied troops and other support from them; but he was a governor who, instead of exercising the usual despotic sway, endeavoured to attach the provincials to Rome and to himself personally. His chivarlrous character rendered it easy for him to enter into Spanish habits, and excited in the Spanish nobility the most ardent enthusiasm for the wonderful foreigner who had a spirit so kindred with their own.
** Vol. 4, Part 1. Pg.20. Translated by W.P Dickson

*..As [[Salmanezer]] and [[Nebuchadnezzar II|Nebuchadnezzar]] had formerly carried the [[Jews]] to [[Babylon]], so now from all the frontier provinces of the new kingdom (of Armenia) - from Corduene, Adiabene, [[Assyria]],[[Cilicia]],[[Cappadocia]] - the inhabitants, especially the Greek or half-Greek citizens of the towns, were compelled to settle with their whole goods and chattels in the new capital, one of those gigantic cities proclaiming rather the nothingness of the people than the greatness of the rulers, which sprang up in the countries of the Euphrates on every change in the supreme sovereignty at the fiat of the new grant Sultan. the new 'city of [[Tigranes]]&quot;, [[Tigranocerta]], situated in in the most southern province of Armenia, not far from the Mesopotamian frontier, was a city like [[Nineveh]] and Babylon, with walls fifty yards high, and the appendages of palace, garden and park that were appropriate to sultanism In other respects, too, the new great king proved faithful to his part. As amidst the perpetual childhood of the East the childlike conceptions of kings with real crowns on their heads have never disappeared, Tigranes, when he showed himself in public, appeared in the state and costume of a successor of [[Darius the Great|Darius]] and [[Xerxes]], with the purple fagtan, the half white half-purple tunic, the long plaited trousers, the high turban, and the royal diadem - attended moreover and served in slavish fashion, wherever he went or stoood, by four &quot;kings.&quot;
** Vol. 4, Part: 1. Chapter 2 Pg. 47 - &quot;Rule of the Sullan Restoration&quot; Translated by W.P. Dickson.

* This (The launching of an invasion into [[Third Mithridatic War|Armenia]]) was itself hazardous; but the smallness of the number (of the army, not more than 15,000 men) might be in some degree compensated by the tried valour of the army consisting throughout of veterans. A much worse circumstance was the temper of the soldiers, to which Lucullus, in his high aristocratic fashion, had given far too little heed. Lucullus was an able general, and - according to the aristocratic standard - an upright and benevolent man, but very far from being a favorite with his soldiers. He was unpopular, as a decided adherent of the [[optimates|oligarghy]];unpopular, because he had vigorously checked the monstrous usury of the Roman capitalists in Asia Minor; unpopular, on account of the toils and fatigues which he inflicted on his troops; unpopular, because he demanded strict discipline in his soldiers and prevented as far as possible the pillage of the Greek towns by his men, but withal caused many a waggon and many a camel to be alden with the treasures of the East for himself; unpopular too on account of his manner, which was polished, stately, [[Hellenising]], not at all familiar, and inclining, wherever it was possible, to ease and pleasure. There was no trace in him of the charm which creates a personal bond between the general and the soldier. 
** Vol. 4, Pt. 1, Chpt 2. &quot;Rule of the Sullan Restoration&quot; Translated by W.P. Dickson
** Beginning of the Armenian War

=== ''The History of Rome'' - Volume 4: Part 2 ===
[[File:César (13667960455).jpg|thumb|No one takes an evil spirit into his service without becoming himself enslaved to it; but the greatest men are not those who err the least.''Bust of [[Julius Caesar]]'']]
* The highest revelations of humanity are perishable; the religion once true may become a lie, the polity once fraught with blessing may become a curse; but even the gospel that is past still finds confessors, and if such a faith cannot remove mountains like faith in the living truth, it yet remains true to itself down to its very end, and does not depart from the realm of the living till it has dragged its last priest and its last partisans along with it, and a new generation, freed from those shadows of the past and the perishing, rules over a world that has renewed its youth.
** Vol. 4, pt. 2, translated by W.P.Dickson.

* An equally characteristic feature in the brilliant decay of this period was the emancipation of women. In an economic point of view the women had long since made themselves independent;(57) in the present epoch we even meet with solicitors acting specially for women, who officiously lend their aid to solitary rich ladies in the management of their property and their [[lawsuit]]s, make an impression on them by their knowledge of business and law, and thereby procure for themselves ampler perquisites and legacies than other loungers on the exchange. But it was not merely from the economic guardianship of father or husband that women felt themselves emancipated. Love-intrigues of all sorts were constantly in progress. The ballet-dancers (-mimae-) were quite a match for those of the present day in the variety of their pursuits and the skill with which they followed them out; their primadonnas, Cytheris and the like, pollute even the pages of history. But their, as it were, licensed trade was very materially injured by the free art of the ladies of aristocratic circles. '''Liaisons in the first houses had become so frequent, that only a scandal altogether exceptional could make them the subject of special talk; a judicial interference seemed now almost ridiculous. An unparalleled scandal, such as Publius Clodius produced in 693 at the women's festival in the house of the Pontifex Maximus, although a thousand times worse than the occurrences which fifty years before had led to a series of capital sentences,(58) passed almost without investigation and wholly without punishment.''' The watering-place season—in April, when political business was suspended and the world of quality congregated in Baiae and Puteoli— derived its chief charm from the relations licit and illicit which, along with music and song and elegant breakfasts on board or on shore, enlivened the gondola voyages. There the ladies held absolute sway; but they were by no means content with this domain which rightfully belonged to them; they also acted as politicians, appeared in party conferences, and took part with their money and their intrigues in the wild coterie-doings of the time. Any one who beheld these female statesmen performing on the stage of Scipio and Cato and saw at their side the young fop—as with smooth chin, delicate voice, and mincing gait, with headdress and neckerchiefs, frilled robe, and women's sandals he copied the loose courtesan— might well have a horror of the unnatural world, in which the sexes seemed as though they wished to change parts. What ideas as to divorce prevailed in the circles of the aristocracy may be discerned in the conduct of their best and most moral hero Marcus Cato, who did not hesitate to separate from his wife at the request of a friend desirous to marry her, and as little scrupled on the death of this friend to marry the same wife a second time. Celibacy and childlessness became more and more common, especially among the upper classes. While among these marriage had for long been regarded as a burden which people took upon them at the best in the public interest,(59) we now encounter even in Cato and those who shared Cato's sentiments the maxim to which Polybius a century before traced the decay of Hellas,(60) that it is the duty of a citizen to keep great wealth together and therefore not to beget too many children. Where were the times, when the designation &quot;children-producer&quot; (-proletarius-) had been a term of honour for the Roman?
** Vol. 4, Pt. 2, Translated by W.P. Dickson. 
** On Women in Rome at the Decline of the Republic.

* Mankind have infinite difficulty in reaching new creations, and therefore cherish the once developed forms as sacred heirlooms.
** Vol. 4. Part 2. Translated by W.P. Dickson

* '''Fate is mightier than genius.''' Caesar desired to become the restorer of the civil commonwealth, and became the founder of the new military monarchy which he abhorred; he overthrew the regime of aristocrats and banks in the state, only to put a military regime in their place, and the commonwealth continued as before to be tyrannized and turned to profit by a privileged minority. And yet it is a privilege of the highest natures thus creatively to err. The brilliant attempts of great men to realize the ideal, though they do not reach their aim, form the best treasures of nations.
** Vol. 4, pt. 2. translated by W.P. Dickson.

* The belief that it is useless to employ partial and palliative means against radical evils, because they only remedy them in part, is an article of faith never preached unsuccessfully by meanness to simplicity, but it is none the less absurd.
** Vol. 4, pt. 2, translated by W.P.Dickson.

* Of all pitiful parts none is more pitiful than passing for more than one really is; and it is the fate of monarchy that this misfortune inevitably clings to it, for barely once in a thousand years does there arise among the people a man who is king not merely in name, but in reality.
** Vol. 4, pt. 2, translated by W.P.Dickson.

*n a word, this new office of Imperator was nothing else than the primitive regal office re-established; for it was those very restrictions--as respected the temporal and local limitation of power, the collegiate arrangement, and the cooperation of the senate or the community that was necessary for certain cases-- which distinguished the consul from the king.(17) There is hardly a trait of the new monarchy which was not found in the old: the union of the supreme military, judicial, and administrative authority in the hands of the prince; a religious presidency over the commonwealth; the right of issuing ordinances with binding power; the reduction of the senate to a council of state; the revival of the patriciate and of the praefecture of the city. But still more striking than these analogies is the internal similarity of the monarchy of Servius Tullius and the monarchy of Caesar; if those old kings of Rome with all their plenitude of power had yet been rulers of a free community and themselves the protectors of the commons against the nobility, Caesar too had not come to destroy liberty but to fulfil it, and primarily to break the intolerable yoke of the aristocracy. Nor need it surprise us that Caesar, anything but a political antiquary, went back five hundred years to find the model for his new state; for, seeing that the highest office of the Roman commonwealth had remained at all times a kingship restricted by a number of special laws, the idea of the regal office itself had by no means become obsolete. At very various periods and from very different sides-- in the decemviral power, in the Sullan regency, and in Caesar's own dictatorship--there had been during the republic a practical recurrence to it; indeed by a certain logical necessity, whenever an exceptional power seemed requisite there emerged, in contradistinction to the usual limited -imperium-, the unlimited -imperium- which was simply nothing else than the regal power.
**On the Re-Establishment of the Monarchy
**Vol. 4. pt. 2, Translated by W. P. Dickson

* But while at the bottom of the national life the slime was thus constantly accumulating more and more deleteriously and deeply, so much the more smooth and glittering was the surface, overlaid with the varnish of polished manners and universal friendship. All the world interchanged visits; so that in the houses of quality it was necessary to admit the persons presenting themselves every morning for the levee in a certain order fixed by the master or occasionally by the attendant in waiting, and to give audience only to the more notable one by one, while the rest were more summarily admitted partly in groups, partly en masse at the close—a distinction which Gaius Gracchus, in this too paving the way for the new monarchy, is said to have introduced. The interchange of letters of courtesy was carried to as great an extent as the visits of courtesy; &quot;friendly&quot; letters flew over land and sea between persons who had neither personal relations nor business with each other, whereas proper and formal business-letters scarcely occur except where the letter is addressed to a corporation. In like manner invitations to dinner, the customary new year's presents, the domestic festivals, were divested of their proper character and converted almost into public ceremonials; even death itself did not release the Roman from these attentions to his countless &quot;neighbours,&quot; but in order to die with due respectability he had to provide each of them at any rate with a keepsake. Just as in certain circles of our mercantile world, the genuine intimacy of family ties and family friendships had so totally vanished from the Rome of that day that the whole intercourse of business and acquaintance could be garnished with forms and flourishes which had lost all meaning, and thus by degrees the reality came to be superseded by that spectral shadow of &quot;friendship,&quot; which holds by no means the least place among the various evil spirits brooding over the proscriptions and civil wars of this age.
** Vol. 4, Pt. 2, Translated by W.P. Dickson.
** On Roman Friendship in the last ages of the Republic.

* With unrivalled activity.. [he] concentrated the most varied and most complicated functions of government in his own person. He himself watched over the distribution of grain, selected the jurymen, founded the colonies.. regulated the highways and concluded building-contracts, led the discussions of the senate, settled the consular elections - in short; he accustomed the people to the fact that one man was the foremost in all things, and threw the lax and lame administration of the senatorial college into the shade by the vigour and dexterity of his personal rule.
** Vol. 4, Translated by W.P. Dickson.
** On Gaius Gracchus.

* The constitutional struggle was at an end; and that it was so, was proclaimed by Marcus Cato when he fell on his sword at Utica. For many years he had been the foremost man in the struggle of the legitimate republic against its oppressors; he had continued it, long after he had ceased to cherish any hope of victory. But now the struggle itself had become impossible; the republic which Marcus Brutus had founded was dead and never to be revived; what were the republicans now to do on the earth? The treasure was carried off, the sentinels were thereby relieved; who could blame them if they departed? There was more nobility, and above all more judgment, in the death of Cato than there had been in his life. Cato was anything but a great man; but with all that short-sightedness, that perversity, that dry prolixity, and those spurious phrases which have stamped him, for his own and for all time, as the ideal of unreflecting republicanism and the favourite of all who make it their hobby, he was yet the only man who honourably and courageously championed in the last struggle the great system doomed to destruction. '''Just because the shrewdest lie feels itself inwardly annihilated before the simple truth, and because all the dignity and glory of human nature ultimately depend not on shrewdness but on honesty''', Cato has played a greater part in history than many men far superior to him in intellect. It only heightens the deep and tragic significance of his death that he was himself a fool; in truth it is just because Don Quixote is a fool that he is a tragic figure. It is an affecting fact, that on that world-stage, on which so many great and wise men had moved and acted, the fool was destined to give the epilogue. He too died not in vain. It was a fearfully striking protest of the republic against the monarchy, that the last republican went as the first monarch came—a protest which tore asunder like gossamer all that so-called constitutional character with which Caesar invested his monarchy, and exposed in all its hypocritical falsehood the shibboleth of the reconciliation of all parties, under the aegis of which despotism grew up. The unrelenting warfare which the ghost of the legitimate republic waged for centuries, from Cassius and Brutus down to Thrasea and Tacitus, nay, even far later, against the Caesarian monarchy—a warfare of plots and of literature— was the legacy which the dying Cato bequeathed to his enemies. This republican opposition derived from Cato its whole attitude— stately, transcendental in its rhetoric, pretentiously rigid, hopeless, and faithful to death; and accordingly it began even immediately after his death to revere as a saint the man who in his lifetime was not unfrequently its laughing-stock and its scandal. But the greatest of these marks of respect was the involuntary homage which Caesar rendered to him, when he made an exception to the contemptuous clemency with which he was wont to treat his opponents, Pompeians as well as republicans, in the case of Cato alone, and pursued him even beyond the grave with that energetic hatred which practical statesmen are wont to feel towards antagonists opposing them from a region of ideas which they regard as equally dangerous and impracticable.
** Vol.4. Part 2.
** The End of the Republic and it's correspondence with the death of Cato.

* It is a dreadful picture—this picture of Italy under the rule of the oligarchy. There was nothing to bridge over or soften the fatal contrast between the world of the beggars and the world of the rich. The more clearly and painfully this contrast was felt on both sides—the giddier the height to which riches rose, the deeper the abyss of poverty yawned—the more frequently, amidst that changeful world of speculation and playing at hazard, were individuals tossed from the bottom to the top and again from the top to the bottom. The wider the chasm by which the two worlds were externally divided, the more completely they coincided in the like annihilation of family life—which is yet the germ and core of all nationality—in the like laziness and luxury, the like unsubstantial economy, the like unmanly dependence, the like corruption differing only in its tariff, the like criminal demoralization, the like longing to begin the war with property. Riches and misery in close league drove the Italians out of Italy, and filled the peninsula partly with swarms of slaves, partly with awful silence. It is a terrible picture, but not one peculiar to Italy; wherever the government of capitalists in a slave-state has fully developed itself, it has desolated God's fair world in the same way as rivers glisten in different colours, but a common sewer everywhere looks like itself, so the Italy of the Ciceronian epoch resembles substantially the Hellas of Polybius and still more decidedly the Carthage of Hannibal's time, where in exactly similar fashion the all-powerful rule of capital ruined the middle class, raised trade and estate-farming to the highest prosperity, and ultimately led to a— hypocritically whitewashed—moral and political corruption of the nation. All the arrant sins that capital has been guilty of against nation and civilization in the modern world, remain as far inferior to the abominations of the ancient capitalist-states as the free man, be he ever so poor, remains superior to the slave; and not until the dragon-seed of North America ripens, will the world have again similar fruits to reap.
** Italy under the Oligarchy

*Few men have had their elasticity so thoroughly put to the proof as Caesar-- the sole creative genius produced by Rome, and the last produced by the ancient world, which accordingly moved on in the path that he marked out for it until its sun went down. Sprung from one of the oldest noble families of Latium--which traced back its lineage to the heroes of the Iliad and the kings of Rome, and in fact to the Venus-Aphrodite common to both nations--he spent the years of his boyhood and early manhood as the genteel youth of that epoch were wont to spend them. He had tasted the sweetness as well as the bitterness of the cup of fashionable life, had recited and declaimed, had practised literature and made verses in his idle hours, had prosecuted love-intrigues of every sort, and got himself initiated into all the mysteries of shaving, curls, and ruffles pertaining to the toilette-wisdom of the day, as well as into the still more mysterious art of always borrowing and never paying. But the flexible steel of that nature was proof against even these dissipated and flighty courses; Caesar retained both his bodily vigour and his elasticity of mind and of heart unimpaired. In fencing and in riding he was a match for any of his soldiers, and his swimming saved his life at Alexandria; the incredible rapidity of his journeys, which usually for the sake of gaining time were performed by night--a thorough contrast to the procession-like slowness with which Pompeius moved from one place to another-- was the astonishment of his contemporaries and not the least among the causes of his success. The mind was like the body. His remarkable power of intuition revealed itself in the precision and practicability of all his arrangements, even where he gave orders without having seen with his own eyes. His memory was matchless, and it was easy for him to carry on several occupations simultaneously with equal self-possession. Although a gentleman, a man of genius, and a monarch, he had still a heart. So long as he lived, he cherished the purest veneration for his worthy mother Aurelia (his father having died early); to his wives and above all to his daughter Julia he devoted an honourable affection, which was not without reflex influence even on political affairs. With the ablest and most excellent men of his time, of high and of humbler rank, he maintained noble relations of mutual fidelity, with each after his kind. As he himself never abandoned any of his partisans after the pusillanimous and unfeeling manner of Pompeius, but adhered to his friends--and that not merely from calculation--through good and bad times without wavering, several of these, such as Aulus Hirtius and Gaius Matius, gave, even after his death, noble testimonies of their attachment to him.
**** Vol.4. Part 2.

* The system of administration was thoroughly remodelled. The Sullan proconsuls and propraetors had been in their provinces essentially sovereign and practically subject to no control; '''those of Caesar were the well-disciplined servants of a stern master, who from the very unity and life-tenure of his power sustained a more natural and more tolerable relation to the subjects''' than those numerous, annually changing, petty tyrants. The governorships were no doubt still distributed among the annually-retiring two consuls and sixteen praetors, but, as the Imperator directly nominated eight of the latter and the distribution of the provinces among the competitors depended solely on him, they were in reality bestowed by the Imperator. The functions also of the governors were practically restricted. [[File:Bust_Julius_Caesar.jpg|thumb|His memory was matchless, and it was easy for him to carry on several occupations simultaneously with equal self-possession. Although a gentleman, a man of genius, and a monarch, he had still a heart. So long as he lived, he cherished the purest veneration for his worthy mother Aurelia... to his daughter Julia he devoted an honourable affection, which was not without reflex influence even on political affairs. '''With the ablest and most excellent men of his time, of high and of humbler rank, he maintained noble relations of mutual fidelity... As he himself never abandoned any of his partisans... but adhered to his friends--and that not merely from calculation--through good and bad times without wavering, several of these, such as Aulus Hirtius and Gaius Matius, gave, even after his death, noble testimonies of their attachment to him.]]The superintendence of the administration of justice and the administrative control of the communities remained in their hands; but their command was paralyzed by the new supreme command in Rome and its adjutants associated with the governor, and the raising of the taxes was probably even now committed in the provinces substantially to imperial officials, so that the governor was thenceforward surrounded with an auxiliary staff which was absolutely dependent on the Imperator in virtue either of the laws of the military hierarchy or of the still stricter laws of domestic discipline. '''While hitherto the proconsul and his quaestor had appeared as if they were members of a gang of robbers despatched to levy contributions, the magistrates of Caesar were present to protect the weak against the strong; and, instead of the previous worse than useless control of the equestrian or senatorian tribunals, they had to answer for themselves at the bar of a just and unyielding monarch. The law as to exactions, the enactments of which Caesar had already in his first consulate made more stringent, was applied by him against the chief commandants in the provinces with an inexorable severity going even beyond its letter; and the tax-officers, if indeed they ventured to indulge in an injustice, atoned for it to their master, as slaves and freedmen according to the cruel domestic law of that time were wont to atone.'''
**Vol. 4, pt. 2, translated by W.P.Dickson

[[Image:Theodor Mommsen by Ludwig Knaus (1881).jpg|thumb|The belief that it is useless to employ partial and palliative means against radical evils, because they only remedy them in part, is an article of faith never preached unsuccessfully by meanness to simplicity, but it is none the less absurd.]]

*Caesar did not confine himself to helping the debtor for the moment; he did what as legislator he could, permanently to keep down the fearful omnipotence of capital. First of all the great legal maxim was proclaimed, that freedom is not a possession commensurable with property, but an eternal right of man, of which the state is entitled judicially to deprive the criminal alone, not the debtor. It was Caesar, who, perhaps stimulated in this case also by the more humane Egyptian and Greek legislation, especially that of Solon,(68) introduced this principle--diametrically opposed to the maxims of the earlier ordinances as to bankruptcy-- into the common law, where it has since retained its place undisputed. According to Roman law the debtor unable to pay became the serf of his creditor.(69) The Poetelian law no doubt had allowed a debtor, who had become unable to pay only through temporary embarrassments, not through genuine insolvency, to save his personal freedom by the cession of his property;(70) nevertheless for the really insolvent that principle of law, though doubtless modified in secondary points, had been in substance retained unaltered for five hundred years; a direct recourse to the debtor's estate only occurred exceptionally, when the debtor had died or had forfeited his burgess-rights or could not be found. It was Caesar who first gave an insolvent the right--on which our modern bankruptcy regulations are based-- of formally ceding his estate to his creditors, whether it might suffice to satisfy them or not, so as to save at all events his personal freedom although with diminished honorary and political rights, and to begin a new financial existence, in which he could only be sued on account of claims proceeding from the earlier period and not protected in the liquidation, if he could pay them without renewed financial ruin.
** Restriction on 'usury' or restrictions on the laws in relation to the collection of interest
**Vol. 4, pt. 2, translated by W.P. Dickson.

* '''[[Hypocrisy]] is the homage that vice pays to virtue.'''
** Vol. 4, pt. 2, translated by W.P.Dickson.

* Absolute power by virtue of its very nature withdraws itself from all specification.
** Vol. 4, Part 2. Translated by W.P. Dickson

* Mankind have infinite difficulty in reaching new creations, and therefore cherish the once developed forms as sacred heirlooms.
** Vol. 4, Part 2. Translated by W.P. Dickson.

*Of all pitiful parts, there is none more pitiful than for passing for more than one really is. And it is the fate of monarchy that this misfortune inevitably clings to it. For barely once in a thousand years, does there arise among the people a man who is a king not merely in name, but in reality.
** Vol 4, Part 2. Translated by W.P. Dickson.

* ..whatever may have been the style and title, the sovereign ruler was there, and accordingly the court established itself at once with all its due accompaniments of pomp, insipidity, and emptiness. Caesar appeared in public not in the robe of the consuls which was bordered with purple stripes, but in the robe wholly of purple which was reckoned in antiquity as the proper regal attire, and received, sitting on his golden chair and without rising from it, the solemn procession of the senate. The festivals in his honour commemorative of birthday, of victories, and of vows, filled the calendar. When Caesar came to the capital, his principal servants marched forth in trips to great distances so as to meet and escort him. To be near to him began to be of such importance, that the rents rose in the quarter of the city where he lived. Personal interviews with him were rendered so difficult by the multitude of individuals soliciting audience, that Caesar found himself compelled in many cases to communicate even with his intimate friends in writing, and that persons even of the highest rank had to wait for hours in the ante-chamber. People felt, more clearly than was agreeable to Caesar himself, that they no longer approached a fellow-citizen. There arose a monarchical aristocracy, which was a remarkable manner at once new and old, and which had sprung out of the idea of casting into the shade the aristocracy of the oligarchy by that of the royalty, the nobility of the patriciate. The patrician body still subsisted, although without essential privileges as an order, in the character of a close aristocratic guild; but as it could receive no new ''gentes'' it had dwindled away more and more in the course of centuries, and in Caesar's time there were not more than fifteen or sixteen patrician ''gentes'' still in existence. Caesar, himself sprung from one of them, got the right of creating new patrician ''gentes'' conferred on the Imperator by decree of the people, and so established, in contrast to the republican nobility, the new aristocracy of the patriciate, which most happily combined all the requisites of a monarchichal aristocracy - the charm of antiquity, entire dependence on the government, and total insignificance. On all sides the new sovereignty revealed itself.
** Vol. 4, Part 2. Translated by W.P. Dickson.
** The New Court.

* We have reached the end of the Roman republic. We have seen it rule for five hundred years in Italy and in the countries on the Mediterranean; we have seen it brought to rum in politics and morals, religion and literature, not through outward violence but through inward decay, and thereby making room for the new monarchy of Caesar. There was in the world, as Caesar found it, much of the noble heritage of past centuries and an infinite abundance of pomp and glory, but little spirit, still less taste, and least of all true delight in life. It was indeed an old world; and even the richly-gifted patriotism of Caesar [b] could not make it young again. The dawn does not return till after the night has fully set in and run its course. But yet with him there came to the sorely harassed peoples on the Mediterranean a tolerable evening after the sultry noon; and when at length after a long historical night a new day dawned once more for the peoples, and fresh nations in free self-movement commenced their race towards new and higher goals, there were found among them not a few, in which the seed sown by Caesar had sprung up, and which were and are indebted to him for their national individuality.[/b]
** Vol. 4, Pt. 2, Translated by W.P. Dickson.
** Last paragraph of the last volume

=== ''The Provinces of the Roman Empire, From Caesar to Diocletian'' 1854-6 ===
* While the Macedonians proper on the lower course of the Haliacmon (Vistritza) and the Axius (Vardar), as far as the Strymon, '''were an originally Greek stock''', whose diversity from the more southern Hellenes had no further significance for the present epoch, and while the Hellenic colonization embraced within its sphere both coasts -on the west with Apollonia and Dyrrachium, on the east in particular with the townships of the Chalcidian peninsula - the interior of the province, on the other hand, was filled with a confused mass of non-Greek peoples,[...] The '''Greek cities''', which the Romans found existing, retained their organisation and their rights; '''Thessalonica, the most considerable of them''', also freedom and autonomy. There existed a League and a Diet ('koinon') of the Macedonian towns, similar to those in Achaia and Thessaly. It deserves mention, as an evidence of the continued working of the memories of the old and great times, that still in the middle of the third century after Christ the diet of Macedonia and individual Macedonian towns issued coins on which, in place of the head and name of the reigning emperor, came those of Alexander the Great. The pretty numerous colonies of Roman burgesses which Augustus established in Macedonia, Byllis not far from Apollonia, Dyrrachium on the Adriatic, on the other coast Dium, Pella, Cassandreia, in the region of Thrace proper Philippi, '''were all of them older Greek towns''', which obtained merely a number of new burgesses and a different legal position, and were called into life primarily by the need of providing quarters in a civilised and not greatly populous province for Italian soldiers who had served their time, and for whom there was no longer room in Italy itself. The granting of Italian rights certainly took place only to gild for the veterans their settlement abroad. That it was never intended to draw Macedonia into a development of Italian culture is evinced, apart from all else, by the fact that '''Thessalonica remained Greek and the capital of the country'''.
** ''The Provinces of the Roman Empire'', vol.1, translated by W.P.Dickson, from the 1909 edition (Chicago, Ares Publishers, 1974), pp. 299–301.

* Bloodless victories are often feeble and dangerous
** On the mission which resulted in Peace by Gauis Caesar to the East in the year 6 A.D.
*** Vol.2

* [[Tiberius|Tiberius Caesar]], who meanwhile had come to reign, did not order an immediate invasion (of [[w:Armenia|Armenia]]), and for the moment the anti-Roman party in Armenia was victorious; but it was not his intention to abandon the important border-land. ON the contrary, the Annexation, probably long resolved on, of the [[Kingdom of Cappadocia]] was carried out in the year 17 (A.D.); the old [[Archelaus]], who had occupied the throne there from the year 36 (B.C.), was summoned to Rome and was there informed that he had ceased to reign.
** On Tiberius' ascension and some of its' consequences for the Eastern portion Roman Empire.

[[File:Theodor Mommsen by Franz von Lenbach.jpg|thumb|Posterity has justified more the policy of conquest than that of concession.]]

* It is not meant to be denied that in a policy of conquest consistency is a dangerous praise, and that Trajan after his fashion yielded in these enterprises more than was reasonable to the effort after external success, and went beyond the rational; but wrong is done to him when his demeanor in the East is referred to blind lust of conquest. He did what Caesar would have done had he lived. His policy is but the other side of that of Nero's statesmen, and the two are as opposite, as they are equally consistent and equally warranted. '''Posterity has justified more the policy of conquest than that of concession.'''
** Trajan's Oriental Policy

* The history of the Jewish land is as little the history of the Jewish people as the history of the States of the Church is that of the Catholics; it is just as requisite to separate the two as to consider them together.
** Judaea and the Jews

* Mischievous and ill-disposed lads are very inconvenient, but not more than inconvenient, in the household as in commonwealth.
** On the Tumultuous state of Alexandria.

==Quotes about Mommsen==
*He so far surpassed his predecessors, in vision and approach, that he still largely dominates Roman studies; almost every subject begins with him, and citations of his works continue unabated. His life was indeed a watershed in our field.
**Herbert W. Benario, 'Theodor Mommsen: In Commemoration of the Ninetieth Anniversary of His Death', ''The Classical Outlook'', Vol. 71, No. 3 (Spring 1994), p. 73

*Mommsen's literary skill reached its apogee in his delineation of the characters of the late Republic. [[Julius Caesar|Caesar]] is the hero, [[Pompey|Pompeius]] and [[Cicero]] misguided opponents of destiny's favorite. The strong man who gathered all the threads of power into his own hands, who undertook the spiritual, moral, military, and political rebirth was Mommsen's ideal. Some might say that he foresaw [[Otto von Bismarck|Bismarck]]; but of Bismarck he later disapproved.
**Herbert W. Benario, 'Theodor Mommsen: In Commemoration of the Ninetieth Anniversary of His Death', ''The Classical Outlook'', Vol. 71, No. 3 (Spring 1994), p. 74

*Mommsen, the indisputable ''Meister'' of Roman history, unrivalled in his own day and today.
**[[Moses I. Finley]], '&quot;Progress&quot; in Historiography', ''Daedalus'', Vol. 106, No. 3, Discoveries and Interpretations: Studies in Contemporary Scholarship, Volume I (Summer 1977), p. 127

*It is not too much to say that Mommsen has no notion whatever of right and wrong. It is not so much that he applauds wrong actions, as that he does not seem to know that right and wrong have anything to do with the matter. No one has set forth more clearly than Mommsen the various stages of the process by which Rome gradually reduced the states round the Mediterranean to a state of dependence—what he, by one of the quasi-technicalities of which we complain, calls a state of clientship. It is, for clear insight into the matter, one of the best parts of the book. But almost every page is disfigured by the writer's unblushing idolatry of mere force. He cannot understand that a small state can have any rights against a great one, or that a patriot in such a state can be anything but a fool.
**[[Edward Augustus Freeman]], 'Mommsen's History of Rome', ''Historical Essays'', second series, third edition (1889), p. 317

*Theodor Mommsen, 1817–1903, is the towering figure among scholars of classical antiquity in the nineteenth century. In Germany today, ancient historians, classical philologists, archaeologists, and exponents of the neighbouring sciences are organized in the ''Mommsen-Gesellschaft''.
**Stephan Heilen, 'The Life of Mommsen', ''The Classical Review'', Vol. 53, No. 2 (October 2003), p. 479

*To explain Rome's rise under the Republic the great Theodor Mommsen in the nineteenth century originated a concept of defensive imperialism (an empire dragged ever outwards as it reacts to threat after threat) shading off into a search for natural, defensible boundaries. This concept proved highly agreeable to a colonial world and found influential proponents in the early twentieth century in [[w:Tenney Frank|Frank]] and [[w:Maurice Holleaux|Holleaux]]. It could confidently be wheeled out as late as the early 1970s.&lt;br&gt;In his book ''War and Imperialism in Republican Rome 327–70 BC'' (Oxford, 1979) [[w:William V. Harris|W.V. Harris]] effectively demolished, at least for our post-colonial age, the idea of defensive imperialism. Instead he replaced it with the concept of Rome as an aggressive polity; driven to foreign wars, and thus often to expansion, by the conscious desire of individual senators (the élite of élites) for military glory and financial gain.
**[[w:Harry Sidebottom|Harry Sidebottom]], 'Roman Imperialism: The Changed Outward Trajectory of the Roman Empire', ''Historia: Zeitschrift für Alte Geschichte'', Bd. 54, H. 3 (2005), pp. 315-316

*When apparently the last eminent guest had long ago taken his place, again those three bugle-blasts rang out, and once more the swords leaped from their scabbards. Who might this late comer be? Nobody was interested to inquire. Still, indolent eyes were turned toward the distant entrance, and we saw the silken gleam and the lifted sword of a guard of honor plowing through the remote crowds. Then we saw that end of the house rising to its feet; saw it rise abreast the advancing guard all along like a wave. This supreme honor had been offered to no one before. There was an excited whisper at our table—'MOMMSEN!'—and the whole house rose. Rose and shouted and stamped and clapped and banged the beer mugs. Just simply a storm! Then the little man with his long hair and Emersonian face edged his way past us and took his seat. I could have touched him with my hand—Mommsen!—think of it! ... I would have walked a great many miles to get a sight of him, and here he was, without trouble or tramp or cost of any kind. Here he was clothed in a titanic deceptive modesty which made him look like other men.
**Mark Twain{{source}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wikisource author}}
{{commons category}}
* {{gutenberg author|id=Theodor_Mommsen|name=Theodor Mommsen}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Mommsen, Theodor}}
[[Category:Academics from Germany]]
[[Category:Politicians from Germany]]
[[Category:Historians from Germany]]
[[Category:Jurists]]
[[Category:Archaeologists from Germany]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors from Germany]]
[[Category:1817 births]]
[[Category:1903 deaths]]
[[Category:Nobel laureates in Literature]]
[[Category:Nobel laureates from Germany]]</text>
      <sha1>jpj3ufcd4a96hsxbaqy56njw5otmwxq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Saudi Arabia</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>59167</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965067</id>
      <parentid>3940731</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:50:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Undid revision [[Special:Diff/3940731|3940731]] by [[Special:Contributions/~2026-29093-22|~2026-29093-22]] ([[User talk:~2026-29093-22|talk]])</comment>
      <origin>3965067</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="37667" sha1="gs473ttyqyfa4llmvmz1s2h32a99b9d" xml:space="preserve">{{Coatrack|date=July 2021|details=a potential majority of quotes and sum of their text relate to [[w:Politics of Saudi Arabia|global political debates of much recency]]}}
[[File:Flag of Saudi Arabia.svg|thumb|Saudi Arabia is the heart of the Muslim world. ~ [[Abul A'la Maududi]]]]
The '''[[w:Saudi Arabia|Kingdom of Saudi Arabia]]''', otherwise known as simply '''Saudi Arabia''', is the largest [[w:Arab people|Arab]] state in [[Middle East|Western Asia]] by land area (approximately 2,150,000 km2 [830,000 sq mi]), constituting the bulk of the [[w:Arabian Peninsula|Arabian Peninsula]], and the second-largest geographically in the [[w:Arab world|Arab world]]. Politically, Saudi Arabia is an [[absolute monarchy]] led by King [[w:Salman_of_Saudi_Arabia|Salman]] as head of state and Crown Prince [[Mohammad bin Salman]] as head of government. It is one of the world's leading producers and exporters of [[oil]]. It also contains the [[Islam|Islamic]] holy cities of [[Mecca]] and Medina. Its official religion is [[Islam]].  

__NOTOC__
[[#A|A]] &amp;ndash; [[#B|B]] &amp;ndash; [[#C|C]] &amp;ndash; [[#D|D]] &amp;ndash; [[#E|E]] &amp;ndash; [[#F|F]] &amp;ndash; [[#G|G]] &amp;ndash; [[#H|H]] &amp;ndash; [[#I|I]] &amp;ndash; [[#J|J]] &amp;ndash; [[#K|K]] &amp;ndash; [[#L|L]] &amp;ndash; [[#M|M]] &amp;ndash; [[#N|N]] &amp;ndash; [[#O|O]] &amp;ndash; [[#P|P]] &amp;ndash; [[#Q|Q]] &amp;ndash; [[#R|R]] &amp;ndash; [[#S|S]] &amp;ndash; [[#T|T]] &amp;ndash; [[#U|U]] &amp;ndash; [[#V|V]] &amp;ndash; [[#W|W]] &amp;ndash; [[#X|X]] &amp;ndash; [[#Y|Y]] &amp;ndash; [[#Z|Z]] &amp;ndash; [[#See also|See also]] &amp;ndash; [[#External links|External links]]

Turki Alalshikh !

Mohammed ... 


Mohammed you and your father will get Warrant of Arrest too High Court Europe ! Turki Alalshikh is not a World Promoter can not pay to be close to the World Fighters and he is suspended he is going in Jail in Saudi Arabia and suspended can work Construction Works read here he got there to stay away since tow years I do let know to stay away he can not pay to be close to the World Title Fighters peak of peak only in Saudi Arabia and Saudi Arabia Fighters he is not a Wold Promoter he can not misuse his Konto to be close to the World Fighters ! 

Turki Alalshikh !

You are leading right not the Court too away from the Fighters I do not educate you ass hole to misuse the Fighters because of you they do go in Jail you can not be close to the World Fighters you are not World Promoter you can not Pay to be close to the World Fighters that is illegal : your Budgets and the Konto going in arrest you got no rights more and the Properties and Cars you go years in Jail I did give report Supreme Justice Court USA you Are sick made you sick to pay to close the World Title Belts and World Fighters that is against tbe law set is because of psychological Problems misuse the Budgets to pay to close to the World Title Fighters that is not allowed against the Law set is they will check you : International High Court Europe Case there you got really Mentally Problems acting the Hero paying to act the Promoter for the World Fighters they got their Promoters and Gyms but not you are that you will spend years in Psychiatry after the High Court is checking you : as Adviser at the Court you got no rights to pull the world fighters to Saudi Arabia or NFL against the Law you are leaving the Court too I do suspend you the decisions I do worldwide Politics to Sports to Courts to Music Grammy Oscars Hollywood and Car Companies etc. you are leaving the Court too and send Canelo away he is going Jail he can not be in Saudi Arabia and you can not be close to Canelo listen everybody want to that Promoter world Fighters they all are more rich as you do you see somebody is doing that of course not is against the Law you do need in Saudi Arabia world peak fighters and need to be World Promotion ! Away from the Fighters and away in the Media !

== Quotes ==
:&lt;small&gt;Alphabetized by author &lt;/small&gt;
=== A ===
[[File:Emblem of Saudi Arabia.svg|thumb|Even if all the Muslim countries in the world were steeped in inequity and laxity it would not cause as much harm to the cause of Islam, as it would if, God forbid, Saudi Arabia starts showing these trends. ~ [[Abul A'la Maududi]]]]
[[File:President_and_First_Lady_Obama,_With_Saudi_King_Salman,_Shake_Hands_With_Members_of_the_Saudi_Royal_Family.jpg|thumb|Saudi Arabia has become a firm friend of the United States. As its influence dramatically expands in the world, Saudi Arabia has been not only a firm supporter of the peace process but a moderating and conciliatory force on a wide range of global issues. ~ [[Jimmy Carter]]]]

* We have to all realise that criticising some phenomena in our home country does not equate to hating it, wishing evil upon it nor is it an attempt to shake its balance, it's the total opposite. Any Saudi citizen might be upset by some incidents that occur in the Kingdom, but that is only a direct sign of one's interest in the betterment of one's own country and one's hope to see Saudi Arabia as a global leader.
** [[Loujain al-Hathloul]], ''[http://www.loujainhathloul.com/myarticles/enstatement A Clarification]'' (March 24, 2016)

* If you go to school in Saudi Arabia, what do you learn about people who are not followers of [[Wahhabism|Wahhabi]], of the prophet? '''The religious curriculum in Saudi Arabia teaches you that people are basically two sides: [[Salafi movement|Salafis]] [Wahhabis], who are the winners, the chosen ones, who will go to [[heaven]], and the rest. The rest are [[Muslim|Muslims]] and [[Christianity|Christians]] and [[Judaism|Jews]] and others. Even muslims of other sects, all of these people are not accepted by Salafi as Muslims. As I said, &quot;claimant to [[Islam]].&quot; And all of these people are supposed to be hated, to be [[Persecution|persecuted]], even killed.''' And we have several clergy -- not one Salafi clergy -- who have said that against the [[w:Shi'a Islam|Shi'a]] and against the other Muslims. And they have done it in [[w:Algeria|Algeria]], in [[Afghanistan]]. This is the same ideology. They just have the same opportunity. They did it in Algeria and [[Afghanistan]], and now [[New York City|New York]].
** Ahmed Ali, ''[https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/saudi/analyses/wahhabism.html Wahhabism: Analysis]''. PBS.

=== B ===
*&lt;p&gt;One of the most devout and insular countries in the Middle East, Saudi Arabia has emerged from being an underdeveloped desert kingdom to become one of the wealthiest nations in the region thanks to vast oil resources.&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;But its rulers face the delicate task of responding to pressure for reform while combating a growing problem of [[Extremism|extremist]] [[violence]].&lt;/p&gt;
** [http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/country_profiles/791936.stm Saudi Arabia country profile at ''BBC'' (26 March 2011)]

*The growing confrontation in the Gulf between the US and its Saudi-led allies on one side and [[Iran]] and its proxies... which have been blamed by the US on [[w:Iranian_Revolutionary_Guards_Corps|Iran’s Revolutionary Guards]]. This is a standoff that has been coming... Iran’s actions can hardly be said to have occurred in a vacuum... it has been the recent policy of “maximum pressure” on Tehran under the incoherent [[Foreign policy of the United States|foreign policy]] of the [[President Donald Trump|Trump administration]] that has exacerbated the current tensions... the [[W:United States withdrawal from the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action|Trump administration has withdrawn]] unilaterally from the internationally agreed – and successful – [[w:Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action|Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action (JCPOA) of 2015]]... In tandem with the US moves, [[Saudi Arabia]] – one of the countries seen as pushing US policy – has increased its oil production to sell to former buyers of [[w:Iranian oil|Iranian oil]], while at the same time vocally supporting moves to strangle Iranian exports. 
**[[Peter Beaumont (journalist)]] in [https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/jun/14/trump-iran-oil-tanker-attacks  ''Trump’s fanned the flames in Iran, now the fire risks getting out of control, The Guardian,''] (14 June 2019)

* Saudi Arabia propagates [[terrorism]].
** [[w:Shelley Berkley|Shelley Berkley]], U.S. Representative, as quoted in [http://english.aljazeera.net/NR/exeres/27E8A54B-776E-4E84-BEF2-76BC807EC533.htm &quot;US House votes to ban Saudi aid&quot;] (22 June 2007), ''Al-Jazeera''.

===C===
* Saudi Arabia has become a firm friend of the [[United States|United States.]] As its influence dramatically expands in the world, Saudi Arabia has been not only a firm supporter of the peace process but a moderating and conciliatory force on a wide range of global issues.
** [[Jimmy Carter]], Letter to Members of Congress on Middle East Arms Sales (12 May 1978).

* And, once and for all, the Saudis, the [[w:Qatar|Qataris]], and others need to stop their citizens from directly funding extremist organizations, as well as schools and mosques around the world that have set too many young people on a path toward [[w:Radicalization|radicalization]]. When it comes to blocking terrorist recruitment, we have to identify the hotspots—the specific neighborhoods and villages, the [[Prison|prisons]] and [[Education|schools]]—where recruitment happens in clusters.
* I think that the Saudis have a multiple level of responsibilities, first and foremost, stopping their own citizens from continuing the financing for extremists. And, you know, Saudi financing is still a major source of revenue for terrorist groups inside [[Syria]], inside [[Iraq]] elsewhere.
* I know that the — that Saudi individuals have certainly funded other related terrorist groups over time and also exported a lot of [[w:Wahhabism|Wahhabi]] radicalism by kicking out or sending out [[imam]]s and teachers to set up schools and mosques to preach that particularly harsh brand of Islam. So the Saudis have a lot that they can do to both stop and then to help.
** [[Hillary Clinton]], speech at the Council on Foreign Relations [http://time.com/4120295/hillary-clinton-foreign-policy-isis/] (November 20, 2015)

* It is long past time for the Saudis, the Qataris and the [[Kuwait]]is and others to stop their citizens from funding [[Extremism|extremist]] organizations. And they should stop supporting radical schools and mosques around the world that have set too many young people on a path towards extremism.
** [[Hillary Clinton]], speech in [[Cleveland]], [[Ohio]] after the [[w:2016 Orlando nightclub shooting|2016 Orlando nightclub shooting]] [http://time.com/4367046/orlando-shooting-hillary-clinton-transcript/] (June 13, 2016)

* Well it's a gloomy, rainy old day to be here in [[London]], but it could be worse; I could be in Saudi Arabia where [[Man|men]] are men, and [[women]] are cattle. Can I say that?
** [[Pat Condell]], [https://youtube.com/watch/?v=mHh0NdR5Jh0 &quot;More demands from Islam&quot;] (9 October 2007), ''YouTube''.

* One guy said, ''&quot;I'm from Saudi Arabia and I'm proud of my country.&quot;'' Well, good for you, but forgive me for asking why. If you live in Saudi Arabia, what on [[Earth]] have you got to be proud of? If you couldn't dig [[money]] straight out of the ground, you'd all be starving. The only thing your country has to offer the world is [[oil]]. Well, it's not the only thing, but we don't need any [[sand]], and we're all up to here with [[Jihad]], thanks very much.
** [[Pat Condell]], [https://youtube.com/watch/?v=RnLTHHpKl60 &quot;Hello Saudi Arabia&quot;] (2 May 2012), ''YouTube''.

===D===
* Saudi Arabia is the Keeper of the Two Holy Cities, giving her an Islamic orientation of responsibility; she is the counsellor of the [[Arabs|Arab]] world, due to her religious standing, her [[wealth]], and her domestic stability and cohesion.
** Mohammad Saleh Al-Daham, [http://www.dtic.mil/get-tr-doc/pdf?AD=ADA202218 ''The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia's Contribution to Stability in the International Arena''] (May 1988)
*Seductive mirages of [[progress]] notwithstanding, nowhere in the world is [[apartheid]] practiced with more cruelty and finality than in Saudi Arabia. Of course, it is [[women]] who are locked in and kept out, exiled to invisibility and object powerlessness within their own country. It is women who are degraded systematically from [[birth]] to early [[death]], utterly and total and without exception deprived of [[freedom]]. It is women who are sold into [[Marriage in Islam|marriage]] or [[Concubinage in Islam|concubinage]], often before puberty; killed if their hymens are not intact on the [[wedding]] night; kept confined, ignorant, pregnant, poor, without choice or recourse. It is women who are raped and beaten with full sanction of the law. It is women who cannot own [[property]] or [[work]] for a living or determine in any way the circumstances of their own lives. It is women who are subject to a despotism that knows no restraint. Women, locked out and locked in. [[Jimmy Carter|Mr Carter]], enchanted with his good friends, the Saudis. Mr Carter, a sincere advocate of [[human rights]]. Sometimes even a feminist with a realistic knowledge of male hypocrisy and a strong stomach cannot believe the world she lives in. 
**[[Andrea Dworkin]], &quot;A Feminist Looks at Saudi Arabia&quot; (1978)

===E===
* No one should be [[fooled]] into believing that Saudi Arabia is striving towards a more [[w:Open government|open]] and [[W:Pluralism (political philosophy)|pluralistic]] form of [[government]]. ... The very opposite is [[true]], what we are [[witnessing]] is a {{w|regime}} that is tightening its grip on the social fabric of [[society]], choking all forms of [[w:Human rights in Saudi Arabia#Freedom of press and communication|open debate]], suffocating [[civil society]], [[w:Political repression|silencing]] the voice of [[w:Reformism|reform]] and [[w:Political prisoners in Saudi Arabia|imprisoning]] those who are striving towards [[modernity]].
** [[Ben Emmerson]], as quoted in ''[https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/saudi-arabia-torture-political-dissidents-anti-terror-laws-un-mohammad-bin-salman-a8388226.html Saudi Arabia using anti-terror laws to detain and torture political dissidents, UN says]'' (8 June 2018), ''{{w|The Independent}}''.

* Saudi Arabia's [[addiction]] to the [[blood]] [[cult]] of [[w:Capital punishment in Saudi Arabia#Method|public execution]] demeans and [[humiliates]] not only the [[victims]], but all those who participate in the process and Saudi society as a whole.
** [[Ben Emmerson]], as quoted in ''[https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/saudi-arabia-torture-political-dissidents-anti-terror-laws-un-mohammad-bin-salman-a8388226.html Saudi Arabia using anti-terror laws to detain and torture political dissidents, UN says]'' (8 June 2018), ''{{w|The Independent}}''.

===G===
*In the heartlands of [[Islam]], from Saudi mansions to [[Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant|ISIS]] dungeons, there are still [[Slavery|slaves]], laboring, beaten, bought, sold, raped and disposed of in [[Muhammad|Mohammed]]'s name.
**[[Louie Gohmert]], [http://gohmert.house.gov/news/documentsingle.aspx?DocumentID=398237 speech to the United States House of Representatives] (10 July 2015) [http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=zgRvVp8wmhk video]

* From Saudi Arabia, Wahhabi mosques are financed throughout the world.
* We must make it clear to the Saudis that the time of looking the other way is over.
* We will prevent Saudi help in the building or financing of mosques in [[Germany]] where Wahhabi ideas are to be disseminated.
** German Vice Chancellor [[w:Sigmar Gabriel|Sigmar Gabriel]] said to ''Welt am Sonntag'' newspaper. (December 6, 2015) [http://tribune.com.pk/story/1004949/saudi-must-stop-financing-fundamentalist-mosques-abroad-merkels-deputy/]
*The discovery of oil in 1938 launched the transformation of a mostly desert kingdom into a modern country. The country was barely six years old and its founder, King [[Ibn Saud|Abdelaziz ibn Saud]], was already courted by world powers. In 1945, [[Franklin D. Roosevelt]] struck a deal with the Saudi monarch, sitting aboard the ''[[w:USS_Quincy|USS Quincy]]'' on the [[w:Great_Bitter_Lake|Great Bitter Lake]]. The two men agreed that Saudi Arabia would provide America with unimpeded access to exploit the oil, in exchange for military protection and support. The price of a barrel was low for years, the revenues limited, but it was more than enough to build a country from scratch, and by the late 1960s a wave of construction was under way across the kingdom. There was no local expertise, but plenty of money to hire help. Then, in the fall of 1973, the price of [[oil]] quadrupled almost overnight from $3 to $12—roughly the equivalent of $50 in 2019. That October, [[Egypt]] and [[Syria]] had gone to war against [[Israel]], hoping to regain land lost in the [[w:Six-Day_War|Six-Day War]] of 1967. Oil-producing Arab countries declared an embargo on exports to the [[United States]] and other countries that supported Israel in the conflict. Saudi Arabia was reluctant to undermine its alliance with the US but ultimately led the charge and reaped the benefits: Arab hearts filled with pride, briefly grateful to the kingdom for standing up to the West and Israel—a small consolation for past humiliations. Most important, the young country was now awash with cash as billions of dollars flooded the kingdom. Between 1970 and 1974, Saudi Arabia’s oil revenues ballooned from $1.2 billion to $22.5 billion.
**[[w:Kim Ghattas|Kim Ghattas]], ''Black Wave : Saudi Arabia, Iran, and the Forty-Year Rivalry that Unraveled Culture, Religion, and Collective Memory in the Middle East'' (2020) 
*In Saudi Arabia, awareness of what the year 1979 had meant for the kingdom was not as obvious. Juhayman’s siege of the Holy Mosque in Mecca that year, though shocking, had not been a countrywide event, and the kingdom excels—then as today—at camouflaging internal dissent. Awash with cash during the [[1980s]], Saudis could travel anywhere to go to the [[cinema]] and the [[Theatre|theater]] or to sit in cafés in [[Paris]] if they wanted to escape the [[darkness]] engulfing their country. There was no clear turning point to stand against; there were many smaller ones. But now their [[children]] want to know why. Why hadn’t their parents protested when the [[music]] was silenced, when the male guardianship system was tightened, when the religious police started cracking their whips in public malls? How could they have let this happen without a word? This generation of Saudis do not know that Iranians are asking the same questions about 1979; nor do Iranians know that some in Saudi Arabia are fueled by similar feelings of betrayal. Iran and Saudi Arabia are echoing each other, once more, in subtle ways. There was a brief moment in 2018 when it looked as though the two foes were going to compete to undo the damage of 1979: the Saudis from the top down, thanks to a [[Mohammad bin Salman|crown prince]] opening up his country to the [[21st century|twenty-first century]]; and the [[Iranians|Iranian people]], thanks to their own determination to chip away at the system. Instead, the competition continued to be a race to the bottom, as though nothing and nobody was equipped to dissuade the leadership of either country from its own worst instincts. [[Syrian civil war|Syria]], [[Yemen]], and [[Iraq War|Iraq]] paid the price, as did those who raised their voices against their respective leaders in Iran and Saudi Arabia. The most dangerous opponents were those who spoke softly and who presented the most credible alternative to the absolutism of the leaders, such as [[Jamal Khashoggi]]. Or [[w:Nasrin_Sotoudeh|Nasrin Sotoudeh]], an Iranian human rights lawyer sentenced to thirty-eight years in jail and 148 lashes for defending the women campaigning against the mandatory veil.
**[[w:Kim Ghattas|Kim Ghattas]], ''Black Wave : Saudi Arabia, Iran, and the Forty-Year Rivalry that Unraveled Culture, Religion, and Collective Memory in the Middle East'' (2020) 

==== ''The Saudis can't rein in Islamic State. They lost control of global Salafism long ago.'' (2016) ====
&lt;small&gt;F. Gregory Gause III, ''[http://www.latimes.com/opinion/op-ed/la-oe-gause-saudi-arabia-extremism-blame-20160719-snap-story.html The Saudis can't rein in Islamic State. They lost control of global Salafism long ago.] {{w|Los Angeles Times}}'' (July 19, 2016)&lt;/small&gt;

* Can a state be both the target of [[Radical Islam|Islamist extremists]] and responsible for their actions? The [[w:2016 Saudi Arabia bombings|attacks on July 4]] in three Saudi Arabian cities, almost certainly perpetrated by adherents of [[Islamic State]], have once again raised this question for drive-by analysts. They point out that the official interpretation of [[Islam]] in Saudi Arabia, which outsiders refer to as [[Wahhabism]] and Saudis refer to as [[Salafi movement|Salafism]], shares many elements with [[extremist]] ideology. Then they argue that {{w|International propagation of conservative Sunni Islam|Saudi efforts to proselytize Salafism}} played a role in the development of the global [[jihadist]] movement, and that the Saudis thus bear a special [[responsibility]] to rein in their support for Muslim [[institutions]] outside their borders and to [[Moderate Islam|moderate]] their practice of Islam at home. The implication is that if the Saudis would only change their behavior, the threat represented by the radicals would be greatly reduced.

* With the [[w:1970s energy crisis|oil revolution of the 1970s]], the Saudis had enormous resources to support that effort. In the [[1980s]], the Saudis (along with the [[United States]]) supported a [[w:Soviet–Afghan War|campaign in Afghanistan against the Soviet Union]] that both they and [[Federal government of the United States|Washington]] were happy to call a [[jihad]]. At that point, the Saudis lost [[control]] of global Salafism, if they ever really had it.

* What had been a largely apolitical phenomenon of Muslims emulating Saudi Wahhabism in their personal lives became, for part of the global Salafi movement, an element of their political [[identity]].

* Global Salafism is now unmoored from its Saudi origins.

* The Saudis can also contribute to the ideological fight against {{w|Salafi jihadism}}, but not in the way most Western [[liberal]]s think. The admonition for “[[tolerance]]” has much to recommend it as Saudi leaders think  a long term, but the more immediate task is a to convince those attracted to Salafism that the [[violent]] path is, as the Saudi [[clerics]] say, “deviant.” Liberal “[[reform]]s” in Saudi Arabia are not going to convince [[pious]] Salafis that their interpretation of Islam is incorrect. Rather, the Saudis have to redouble their efforts to use the domestic and international institutions of Islam that they created and funded to convince  believers that Salafi Islam itself prohibits the acts of violence perpetrated in its name.

===H===
* I’m tired of being told that out of “tolerance for other [[cultures]]” we must let Saudi Arabia use our oil money to [[w:International propagation of conservative Sunni Islam|fund mosques and madrassa Islamic schools]] to preach [[hate]] in America, while no American group is allowed to fund a [[church]], [[synagogue]] or religious school in Saudi Arabia to teach [[love]] and [[tolerance]].
** [[Robert A. Hall]], ''[http://tartanmarine.blogspot.com.ar/2009/02/robert.html I'm Tired]'' (February 19, 2009)

* Let’s be clear: [[w:Al Qaeda|Al Qaeda]], the [[ISIS|Islamic State]] in Iraq and Syria, [[w:Boko Haram|Boko Haram]], the [[w:Al-Shabaab (militant group)|Shabab]] and others are all violent Sunni [[w:Salafi jihadism|Salafi]] groupings. For five decades, Saudi Arabia has been the official sponsor of Sunni Salafism across the globe.
** Ed Husain, ''[https://www.nytimes.com/2014/08/23/opinion/isis-atrocities-started-with-saudi-support-for-salafi-hate.html Saudis Must Stop Exporting Extremism: ISIS Atrocities Started With Saudi Support for Salafi Hate]'', New York Times, August 22, 2014

* In Saudi Arabia, [[women]] can’t [[Elections|vote]], run for public office, or drive [[Car|cars]]. Women are routinely jailed and beaten for merely being in the presence of a man not related to them. The Saudi version of [[Phil McGraw|Dr. Phil]] provides televised lessons to men on how to properly beat their wives.
**[[Chuck Hustmyre]], [http://www.jihadwatch.org/2009/12/the-lefts-love-affair-with-islam &quot;The Left’s love affair with Islam&quot;] (1 December 2009), ''Jihad Watch''

===M===
* We thank them for the treatment accorded by the Saudi Arabian government to our pilgrims when performing the haj all this while and at times they were given special treatment. In general, the Saudi Arabian government is a good host and we have no problems with them.
** [[Mahathir Mohamad]] received a courtesy call from the Saudi Foreign Minister Adel Ahmed Al-Jubeir at the Perdana Putra building, [[Malaysia]] (26 October 2018) [https://www.nst.com.my/news/nation/2018/10/425300/dr-mahathir-thanks-saudi-arabia-cordial-treatment-malaysian-pilgrims]
* Saudi Arabia is the heart of the [[Muslim world]] … even if all the Muslim countries in the world were steeped in inequity and laxity it would not cause as much harm to the cause of Islam, as it would if, God forbid, Saudi Arabia starts showing these trends ...
** [[Abul A'la Maududi]], quoted in Asaf Hussain, ''Islamic movements in Egypt, Pakistan, and Iran'' (Mansell Pub., 1983), p. 72.
*After the US came to the rescue of Israel during the [[w:Yom_Kippur_War|Yom Kippur War]] of October 1973, Saudi Arabia used oil to reset global politics. Angered by Israeli’s successful counterattack and push into Arab territory, Riyadh announced a complete oil embargo against the US. To ensure that Washington felt economic pain even if oil slipped in through the back door, Saudi Arabia – followed by the OPEC cartel which it dominated – cut [[production]] ultimately by 25 per cent, and between September 1973 and March 1974 the oil price quadrupled. [[w:Sheikh_Yamani|Sheikh Yamani]], the Saudi Arabian oil minister, declared: ‘What we want is a complete withdrawal of Israeli forces from occupied Arab territories and then you will have the oil.’ The Saudis thus launched what became known as the ‘oil weapon’. [[Henry Kissinger]], [[United States Secretary of State|US secretary of state]], referred to these démarches as ‘political blackmail’ and as the ‘most important of our century’. The Saudi oil minister spelled out the geopolitical implications by referring to a ‘new type of relationship’ where ‘you have to adjust yourself to the new circumstances’. The US secretary of state adjusted, Israel retreated back east of the [[w:Suez_Canal|Suez Canal]] and the embargo was lifted, but [[International relations|global politics]] would never be the same again. Saudi Arabia, as the swing producer, had demonstrated that it possessed the power to drive up [[inflation]] and break economies, regardless of [[politics]] in the West. That threat has been Saudi Arabia’s entry pass to the global political stage, and it is still there today, but that entry pass is only valid as long as Riyadh is the swing producer. It was the first time that a group of relatively weak states had provoked such dramatic changes in the lives of the vast majority of people on the planet. The consequence eventually was a [[Recession|world economic crisis]], but the raising of the oil price was only one factor. The US had abandoned the [[gold standard]] in 1971, and as a consequence the [[w:Bretton_Woods_system|Bretton Woods system]] collapsed. Thereby the long period of [[economic growth]] in the developed world ended. In [[Germany|West Germany]] driving was banned on Sundays, and the autobahn was given over to pedestrians and cyclists. [[Gross Domestic Product|GDP]] there fell by 1.5 per cent, and unemployment climbed above one million.
**Martin McCauley, ''The Cold War 1949-2016'' (2017)

===N===
* Saudi Arabia has one of the highest rates of [[Capital punishment|executions]] in the world in both absolute numbers and per capita. The death penalty applies to a wide range of non-violent activities such as [[apostasy]] and &quot;[[witchcraft]]&quot;, &quot;[[Adultery|sexual offences]]&quot;, acts deemed to amount to &quot;[[corruption]] on earth&quot;, and crimes such as drug dealing.
**NRI Press, [https://web.archive.org/web/20051215030143/http://www.nriinternet.com/MIDDLE%20EAST/SAUDI_Arabia/2_Executed.htm &quot;NRI beheaded in Saudi Arabia for murder&quot;] (25 July 2005), ''NRIinternet''.
* The Saudis can create a Palestinian state in Saudi Arabia; they have a lot of land over there.
** [[Benjamin Netanyahu]], in an interview with Israel’s Channel 14 on February 6, 2025. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250207174052/https://tribune.com.pk/story/2527128/netanyahu-suggests-saudi-arabia-should-provide-land-to-palestinians]

===O===
* In a huge embarrassment to the Saudi authorities, the Islamic State adopted official Saudi textbooks for its schools until the extremist group could publish its own books in 2015. Out of 12 works by Muslim scholars republished by the Islamic State, seven are by [[w:Muhammad ibn Abd al-Wahhab|Muhammad ibn Abd al-Wahhab]], the 18th-century founder of the Saudi school of Islam.
** Jacob Olidort, [https://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/26/world/middleeast/saudi-arabia-islam.html Saudis and Extremism: ‘Both the Arsonists and the Firefighters’], New York Times

===P===
*The Saudis have never shown any respect for human rights, either now or in the past. Even a [[w:Petty burglary|petty burglar]] faces having one of his hands chopped off. The [[Liberalism|liberal]] [[press]] in America prefers to ignore all this, although they don't hesitate to blacken the reputation of [[Iran]].
**[[Muhammad Reza Pahlavi]], as quoted in Alam, Asadollah, ''The Shah and I'' (1991), I. B. Tauris, p. 535.

*The West’s medieval client, Saudi Arabia – to which the US and [[United Kingdom|Britain]] sell billions of dollars’ worth of arms – is at present destroying [[Yemen]], a country so poor that in the best of times, half the children are malnourished. Look on [[Youtube|YouTube]] and you will see the kind of massive bombs – “our” bombs – that the Saudis use against dirt-poor villages, and against weddings, and funerals. The explosions look like small [[Nuclear weapons|atomic bombs]]. The bomb aimers in Saudi Arabia work side-by-side with [[Royal Air Force|British officers]]. This fact is not on the evening news.
**[[John Pilger]],  [http://www.informationclearinghouse.info/article45752.htm Inside the Invisible Government: War, Propaganda, Clinton &amp; Trump], ''Information Clearing House'', October 28, 2016

===R===
* The women of Saudi Arabia are not just folded away behind swathes of hot black cloth — they live [[w:gender segregation|segregated]] lives.
** Rachel Reid, in [http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/programmes/from_our_own_correspondent/6625393.stm &quot;Making a public splash in Saudi|&quot; in ''BBC News'' (5 May 2007)]

===S===
*They respect the value of my worth in [[w:Maui|Maui]], [[Malaysia]], Iran, and Iraq, Saudi Arabia!
**[[w:Busta Rhymes|Trevor T. Smith]], [http://genius.com/1836892/Busta-rhymes-arab-money/They-respect-the-value-of-my-worth-in-maui-malaysia-iran-and-iraq-saudi-arabia &quot;Arab Money&quot;]

*The formula that food is the way to derive peace actually should be more properly understood in reverse. '''The answer to my question of why we have so many hungry people on the planet when there is no need for that is that it is a deliberate decision that some human beings make in order to appropriate the resources of others, or, as in the case of one of the hot spots on the planet right now for hunger, which is [[Yemen]], it was a deliberate strategy to disrupt the food system specifically to weaken the country in the pursuit of the war between proxies, Saudi Arabia and Iran'''. And so, it’s important to remember that hunger does not always happen because of natural disasters, which is a mental model that most of us fall back upon; it is often the result of things that we actually do to each other deliberately.
**Ricardo Salvador, in [https://www.democracynow.org/2020/12/10/ricardo_salvador_world_hunger As Food Insecurity Surges, Leading Scientist Says Hunger Is a Deliberate Choice by Those in Power,] [[W:Democracy Now!|''Democracy Now!'']] (10 December 2020)

* The kingdom has [[oil]] - and lots of it. But that's only part of the story. Saudia Arabia is important to the [[w:Western world|West]] not despite of its [[brutality]] but because of it, for the Saudi [[dictatorship]]'s seen as a buttress against &quot;instability&quot; in a strategic region. {{w|Riyadh}}'s deeply [[conservative]] [[leaders]] did everything they could to derail the [[w:2011–12 Saudi Arabian protests|Arab spring]], suppressing an upsurge of [[democratic]] sentiment that threatened the regimes with whom the West had always done [[business]]. ... We're all familiar with the outrage that [[politicians]] display about certain [[w:Human rights in the Middle East|human rights violations in the Middle East]] - generally, those committed by regimes or organisations we're about to bomb. But the more usual attitude is a [[realpolitik]] in which the West either supports or quietly ignores the barbarities of favoured states. ... The same kind of [[logic]] holds in respect of Saudi Arabia. The regime might [[w:Human rights in Saudi Arabia|inflict punishments]] every bit as obscene as those enforced by the [[Islamic State]]. But it's a reliable [[ally]], prepared to enforce the [[status quo]] in an oil rich region - and that matters more to the West than the life of a democracy protester.
** [[Jeff Sparrow]], ''[http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-09-29/sparrow-blind-eye-to-saudi-arabia's-brutality/6813422 Why the West turns a blind eye to Saudi Arabia's brutality]'', ''[[w:ABC News (Australia)|ABC News]] (September 29, 2015)

===T===
* If Saudi Arabia was without the cloak of American protection, I don’t think it would be around.
**[[Donald Trump]], interview on foreign policy (25 March 2016), as quoted in [http://www.nytimes.com/2016/03/27/us/politics/donald-trump-foreign-policy.html &quot;In Donald Trump’s Worldview, America Comes First, and Everybody Else Pays&quot;], ''The New York Times'' (26 March 2016)

* I love the Saudis. Many are in this building. They make a billion dollars a day. Whenever they have problems, we send over the ships. We say “we’re gonna protect.” What are we doing? They’ve got nothing but money... Saudi Arabia without us is gone. They're gone... Saudi Arabia is in big, big trouble. Now, thanks to fracking and other things, the oil is all over the place. And I used to say it, there are ships at sea, and this was during the worst crisis, that were loaded up with oil, and the cartel kept the price up, because, again, they were smarter than our leaders. They were smarter than our leaders.
**[[Donald Trump]], at {{w|Trump Tower}}, {{#formatdate:2015-06-16}}, speech announcing his candidacy for U.S. president — {{citation
 | date = June 16, 2015
 | title = Full text: Donald Trump announces a presidential bid
 | author = 
 | newspaper = The Washington Post
 | url = https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-politics/wp/2015/06/16/full-text-donald-trump-announces-a-presidential-bid/
}}

*I get along great with all of them [Saudi Arabians]... They buy apartments from me. They spend $40 million, $50 million. Am I supposed to dislike them? I like them very much!
**[[Donald Trump]], as quoted in [https://www.cnn.com/2018/10/12/politics/trump-saudi-business-ties/index.html &quot;Saudi disappearance puts spotlight on Trump's business ties&quot;] (12 October 2018), by Erica Orden, ''CNN''

=== W ===

* The case of Saudi Arabia highlights the difficulties that democracies face in trying to support freedom, human rights, and [[democracy]]. [[Abdullah of Saudi Arabia|King Abdullah]] heads a [[Royalty|royal family]] that completely controls Saudi society. Thanks to the fact that they own the world's largest reserves of oil, they are virtually immune from international criticism and they do not bother to hold even fake national [[elections]]. By law, all Saudi citizens must be [[Muslim|Muslims]]. It is illegal for Saudis to follow a different religion. A Saudi woman cannot appear in public with a man who is not a relative. Women are required to completely cover their bodies in public and they must wear veils. Some Saudi women have expressed satisfaction with the restrictions in the country. However, the strict suppression of women is not voluntary, and Saudi women who would like to live a freer life are not allowed to do so. King Abdullah and his relatives follow an intolerant version of Islam known in the West as Wahhabism. Since 1975, the [[House of Saud|Saudi royal family]] has spent more than $70 billion financing mosques and Islamic centers worldwide, including more than $300 million in the United States, where most Muslims studying in [[Arabic]] use Saudi textbooks, some of which are virulently [[w:Anti-Christian|anti-Christian]] and [[Antisemitism|anti-Jewish]]. If Saudi Arabia did not control so much oil, King Abdullah and the Saudi royal family would be treated just as much as pariahs as are [[Than Shwe]] and the [[Myanmar|Burmese]] generals. 
** David Wallechinsky, ''Tyrants: The World's 20 Worst Living Dictators'' (2006), p. 2

==See also==
*[[Islam]]

==External links==
{{Wikivoyage}}
{{similarlinks}}

[[Category:Saudi Arabia| ]]</text>
      <sha1>gs473ttyqyfa4llmvmz1s2h32a99b9d</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Vietnam</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>72597</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965068</id>
      <parentid>3942127</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:51:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965068</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="25210" sha1="phja8u4ewmy1mgfffjfhvn2w55bjvuj" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Emblem of Vietnam.svg|thumb|Vietnam is [[strong]] [[eternal]]. ~ Van Cao]]
[[File:Flag of Vietnam.svg|thumb|Kiss me goodbye and write me while I'm gone. Goodbye my sweetheart, hello Vietnam. ~ [[w:Dave Dudley|Dave Dudley]]]]
[[File:Flag of the Communist Party of Vietnam.svg|thumb|Vietnam was never all that ideologically [[Communism|communist]]. It was always more socialist and nationalist. I told them they should stop calling themselves 'the [[Communism|communist]] [[party]]', but I didn't get anywhere with it. Everybody pays for everything over there, including healthcare. The government hardly provides anything. Sweden is more socialist than Vietnam. ~ [[w:Pete Peterson|Pete Peterson]]]]
[[File:Long_bien_bridge.jpg|thumb|We the People remain resolute in our hearts and minds. Courageously we will fight such that everywhere, the Glory of the Vietnamese forever resounds! ~ [[w:Lưu Hữu Phước|Lưu Hữu Phước]]]]
[[File:Vietcong_Guerrilla_Patrols.jpg|thumb|I used to see Vietnam as a [[war]] rather than a [[Countries|country]]. ~ [[John Pilger]]]]
[[File:French_Indochina_c._1930.jpg|thumb|'''In Hanoi, the capital, in September 2nd, the provisional gouvernment was formed around President [[Ho Chi Minh]]; it presented itself to the nation, proclaimed the independence of Viet Nam, and called on the nation to unite, to hold itself in readiness to defend the country and to oppose all attempts at [[imperialist]] aggression. The [[w:North Vietnam|Democratic Republic of Viet Nam]] was born, the first people's democracy in South-east Asia.''' ~ [[Võ Nguyên Giáp]]]]
[[File:Bâtiments_172.jpg|thumb|Vietnam’s century-old [[French]] [[w:Villas|villas]] and [[French Indochina|colonial-era]] [[government]] [[buildings]] are a draw for the 8 million [[tourists]] who visit the country every year. &lt;br&gt; “Even in France we don’t have so many examples of the beautiful [[w:Wrought-iron|wrought-iron]] [[w:Railing|railings]] and [[w:Staircase|staircases]] that you see here,” said French Consul General Emmanuel Ly-Batallan. ~ Zanna K. McKay]]
'''[[w:Vietnam|Vietnam]]''' ([[w:Vietnamese|Vietnamese]]: ''Việt Nam''), officially the '''[[w:Socialist republic|Socialist Republic]] of Vietnam''' ('''SRV'''; Vietnamese: ''Cộng hòa xã hội chủ nghĩa Việt Nam'') is the easternmost country on the [[w:Indochina|Indochina Peninsula]] in [[w:Southeast Asia|Southeast Asia]]. With an estimated 90.5 million inhabitants as of 2014, it is the world's [[w:List of countries and dependencies by population|13th-most-populous country]], and the [[w:List of Asian countries by population|eighth-most-populous Asian country]]. [[w:Names of Vietnam|The name Vietnam]] translates as &quot;Southern Viet&quot; (synonymous with the much older term [[w:Nam Viet|Nam Viet]]); it was first officially adopted in 1802 by Emperor [[w:Gia Long|Gia Long]], and was adopted again in 1945 with the founding of the [[w:Democratic Republic of Vietnam|Democratic Republic of Vietnam]] under [[Ho Chi Minh]]. The country is bordered by [[China]] to the north, [[w:Laos|Laos]] to the northwest, [[w:Cambodia|Cambodia]] to the southwest, and the [[w:South China Sea|South China Sea]] to the east. Its capital city has been [[w:Hanoi|Hanoi]] since the reunification of [[w:North Vietnam|North]] and [[w:South Vietnam|South Vietnam]] in 1976, following the conclusion of the [[Vietnam War]].
__NOTOC__
{{TOCalpha}}

== Quotes ==
===A===
* While [general secretary {{w|Nguyễn Phú Trọng}}] believes that the [Vietnamese Communist Party’s] legitimacy comes through anti-corruption campaigns, in reality, legitimacy primarily comes through performance.&lt;br&gt;…Contrary to strengthening the party, Trong has helped to delegitimize it, exposing the rot across the senior leadership, while at the same time slowing economic growth. He has also stifled civil society and [https://www.rfa.org/english/news/vietnam/lam-03262024160918.html independent media], which tries to hold the party leadership to account.
** Zachary Abuza, [https://www.rfa.org/english/commentaries/vietnam-corruption-thichminhtue-06192024112612.html &quot;Mendicant monk Thích Minh Tuệ offers an embarrassing contrast to Vietnam elites&quot;], ''Radio Free Asia'' (June 19, 2024)

===C===
* Vietnam is strong eternal.
** Van Cao, [https://web.archive.org/web/20110907132559/http://www.vietnamembassy-usa.org/learn_about_vietnam/politics/national_anthem/ &quot;March to the Front&quot;] (1944)
** Original Vietnamese: ''Nuoc non Vietnam ta vung ben.''

* Strap on my arm; the streets is feeling like Vietnam.
** [[w:David Banner|Lavell W. Crump]], [http://www.megalyrics.net/david-banner/bloody-war#strap-on-my-arm-the-streets-is-feeling-like-vietnam &quot;Bloody War&quot;] (2005), ''Certified''.

===D===
* The prime unifying motivation for [[revolution]] in Vietnam was the goal of throwing off foreign subjugation. For hundreds of years the Vietnamese fought against a multitude of enemies, taking on and often defeating [[China|Chinese]] armies, the forces of [[w:Kublai_Khan|Kubla Khan]], and numerous other foes before the [[20th century|twentieth century]]. [[w:Vietnamese_nationalism,|Vietnamese nationalism,]] although temporarily checked by the modern [[Weapon|weaponry]] of Western nations, experienced a rapid resurgence in the 1920s and, heightened further by [[Colonialism|colonial repression]], contributed greatly to the development of the revolution.
** James DeFronzo, ''Revolutions and Revolutionary Movements'', p. 160

* Kiss me goodbye and write me while I'm gone. Goodbye my sweetheart, hello Vietnam.
** {{w|Dave Dudley}}, as quoted in [http://www.metrolyrics.com/hello-vietnam-lyrics-dave-dudley.html &quot;Hello Vietnam&quot;] (1965), by Tom T. Hall, United Kingdom: Decca Records.

===G===
* In August 1945, the [[w:Surrender of Japan|capitulation of the Japanese forces]] before the {{w|Soviet Army}} and the [[w:Allies of World War II|Allied forces]], put an [[w:End of World War II in Asia|end to the world war]]. The defeat of the [[Nazi Germany|German]] and [[Japan during World War II|Nippon]] [[fascists]] was the beginning of a great weakening of the [[capitalist]] system. After the great victory of the [[Soviet Union]], many [[w:People's democracy (Marxism–Leninism)|people's democracies]] saw the light of day. The [[socialist]] system was no longer confined within the frontiers of a single country. A new historic era was beginning in the world. In view of these changes, in Viet Nam, the [[w:Indochinese_Communist_Party|Indo-chinese Communist Party]] and the [[w:Viet_Minh|Viet Minh]] called the whole Vietnamese nation to general [[insurrection]]. Everywhere, the people rose in a body. Demonstrations and displays of force followed each other uninterruptedly. In August, [[w:August Revolution|the Revolution]] broke out, neutralising the bewildered [[w:Imperial_Japanese_Armed_Forces|Nippon troops]], overthrowing the pro-Japanese [[Feudalism|feudal]] authorities, and installing people's power in Hanoi and throughout the country, in the towns as well as in the countryside, in Bac Bo as well as in Nam Bo. In Hanoi, the capital, in September 2nd, the provisional gouvernment was formed around President [[Ho Chi Minh]]; it presented itself to the nation, proclaimed the independence of Viet Nam, and called on the nation to unite, to hold itself in readiness to defend the country and to oppose all attempts at [[imperialist]] aggression. The [[w:North Vietnam|Democratic Republic of Viet Nam]] was born, the first people's democracy in South-east Asia. But the imperialists intended to nip the republican regime in the bud and once again transform [[Viet Nam]] into a colony. Three weeks had hardly gone by when, on September 23rd, 1945, the [[w:French Far East Expeditionary Corps|French Expeditionary Corps]] opened fire in Saigon. The whole was to be carried on for nine years at the cost of unprecedented heroism and amidst unimaginable difficulties, to end by the shining victory of our people and the crushing defeat of the aggressive imperialists at Dien Bien Phu. ... '''Never before had there been so many foreign troops on the soil of Viet Nam. But never before either, had the Vietnamese people been so determined to rise up in combat to defend their country.'''
** [[Võ Nguyên Giáp]], ''[https://www.marxists.org/archive/giap/1961-pwpa.pdf People’s War, People’s Army]''(1962).

===J===
* Our history this year we see in Vietnam. Men there are dying; men named Fernandez and Zajac and Zelinko and Mariano and McCormick. Neither the enemy who killed them nor the people whose independence they have fought to save ever asked them where they or their parents came from. They were all [[United States|Americans]]. It was for free men and for America that they gave their all, they gave their lives and selves. By eliminating that same question as a test for [[immigration]] the [[United States Congress|Congress]] proves ourselves worthy of those men and worthy of our own traditions as a nation
** [[Lyndon B. Johnson|Lyndon Johnson]], [http://www.lbjlibrary.org/lyndon-baines-johnson/timeline/lbj-on-immigration Remarks at the Signing of the Immigration Bill] (3 October 1965).

* The people of Vietnam, north and south, seek the same things. The shared needs of man, the needs for food and shelter and education, the chance to build and work and till the soil, free from the arbitrary horrors of battle, the desire to walk in the [[dignity]] of those who master their own [[destiny]]. For many painful years, in war and revolution and infrequent [[peace]], they have struggled to fulfill those needs. It is a crime against mankind that so much [[courage]], and so much will, and so many dreams, must be flung on the fires of war and death... How many men who listen to me tonight have served their nation in other wars? How very many are not here to listen? The [[Vietnam War|war in Vietnam]] is not like these other wars. Yet, finally, [[war]] is always the same. It is young men dying in the fullness of their promise. It is trying to kill a man that you do not even know well enough to hate. Therefore, to know [[war]] is to know that there is still madness in this world.
** [[Lyndon B. Johnson|Lyndon Johnson]], [http://millercenter.org/president/speeches/speech-4035 State of the Union Address] (12 January 1966).

* Last year the nature of the war in Vietnam changed again. Swiftly increasing numbers of armed men from the North crossed the borders to join forces that were already in the [[South Vietnam|South]]. Attack and terror increased, spurred and encouraged by the belief that the United States lacked the will to continue and that their victory was near. Despite our desire to limit conflict, it was necessary to act: to hold back the mounting aggression, to give courage to the people of the South, and to make our firmness clear to the North. Thus. we began limited air action against military targets in North Vietnam. We increased our fighting force to its present strength tonight of 190,000 men. These moves have not ended the aggression but they have prevented its success. The aims of the enemy have been put out of reach by the skill and the bravery of Americans and their allies—and by the enduring courage of the South Vietnamese who, I can tell you, have lost eight men last year for every one of ours. The enemy is no longer close to victory. Time is no longer on his side. There is no cause to doubt the American commitment. Our decision to stand firm has been matched by our desire for peace.
** [[Lyndon B. Johnson|Lyndon Johnson]], [http://millercenter.org/president/speeches/speech-4035 State of the Union Address] (12 January 1966).

* I drop bombs like I was in Vietnam.
** [[w:Bizarre (rapper)|Rufus Johnson]], [http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/eminem/undertheinfluence.html &quot;Under the Influence&quot;] (2000), ''The Marshall Mathers LP''.

===L===
* Vietnam of course attacked [[Cambodia]].
** [[James W. Loewen]], [http://sundown.afro.illinois.edu/ NGO Holiday Card]

* We the People remain resolute in our hearts and minds. Courageously we will fight such that everywhere, the Glory of the Vietnamese forever resounds!
** {{w|Lưu Hữu Phước}}, &quot;[[w:Thanh niên hành khúc|Thanh niên hành khúc]]&quot;
** Original Vietnamese: ''Người Công Dân luôn vững bền tâm trí. Hùng tráng quyết chiến đấu làm cho khắp nơi. Vang tiếng người nước Nam cho đến muôn đời!''

* Bones have broken, and blood has fallen, the hatred is rising high. Our country has been separated for so long. Here, the sacred Mekong, here, glorious Truong Son Mountains are urging us to advance to kill the enemy. Shoulder to shoulder, under a common flag. Arise!
** {{w|Lưu Hữu Phước}}, &quot;[[w:Giải phóng miền Nam|Liberate the South]]&quot; (July 1969)

===M===
* Vietnam’s century-old [[French]] [[w:Villas|villas]] and [[French Colonial Empire|colonial-era]] [[government]] [[buildings]] are a draw for the 8 million [[tourists]] who visit the country every year. &lt;br&gt; “Even in [[France]] we don’t have so many examples of the beautiful [[w:Wrought-iron|wrought-iron]] [[w:Railing|railings]] and [[w:Staircase|staircases]] that you see here,” said French Consul General Emmanuel Ly-Batallan. &lt;br&gt; Heavy [[w:Roof|roofs]] are designed to withstand [[typhoons]] and large [[w:Window|windows]] placed strategically to catch the [[breeze]]. The consulate, now dwarfed by a [[w:Skyscraper|skyscraper]] under [[construction]], is considered one of the best-preserved examples of the [[architecture]] of ''Cochinchina'', the French name for [[South Vietnam|southern Vietnam]].
** Zanna K. McKay, [https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2017/03/04/vietnam-architectural-gems-disappearing/97098474/ “Vietnam's architectural gems are disappearing”], (March 4, 2017).
* Let me go back one moment. In the [[Cuban Missile Crisis]], at the end, I think we did put ourselves in the skin of the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]]. In the case of Vietnam, we didn't know them well enough to empathize. And there was total misunderstanding as a result. They believed that we had simply replaced the [[French Colonial Empire|French]] as a [[Colonialism|colonial power]], and we were seeking to subject South and North Vietnam to our colonial interests, which was absolutely absurd. And we, we saw Vietnam as an element of the [[Cold War]]. Not what they saw it as: a civil war.
** [[Robert McNamara]], ''The Fog of War'' (2003)

===N===
* We lost, everyday, Vietnamese life, in fighting [[w:North Vietnam|the communists]]... [[Politics of the United States|American democracy]], maybe, cannot work in a [[Countries|country]] like mine, you know, in [[w:South Vietnam|South Vietnam]].
** [[Nguyen Khanh]], as quoted in [http://openvault.wgbh.org/catalog/vietnam-f2fe66-interview-with-nguyen-khanh-1981 &quot;Interview with Nguyen Khanh&quot;] (29 April 1981), WGBH Media Library &amp; Archives.

* I remember that day clearly when I left [[w:Ho Chi Minh City|Saigon]]. I left [[w:South Vietnam|my country]] in [[honor]] that day... [[China]] presents Vietnam with a very big problem. China is taking over Vietnam, from Cholon, where there are rich [[Chinese people|Chinese]], to Haiphong. They are everywhere now with their product. My wife is from the North, people there resent China more than the South feared the Viet Cong. The Chinese are invaders — like any other foreigners — to fight. We must stop the Chinese. You know the dikes built on the Red River? If they break, what happens? A flood!
** [[Nguyen Khanh]], as quoted in [http://web.archive.org/web/20080921114015/http://65.45.193.26:8026/cms/acct/vietweekly/issues/vw3n18/english/bagOfEarth.html &quot;A Bag of Earth, A Promise To Keep&quot;] (28 April 2005), by Mike Nally, ''Viet Weekly''.

* If [[United States|they]] want to assassinate [[w:Nguyễn Văn Thiệu|me]], it's easy. After that, just blame it on the [[w:Viet Cong|Việt Cộng]] or a coup d'etat plot.
** {{w|Văn Thiệu Nguyễn}}, as quoted in [http://antgct.cand.com.vn/News/PrintView.aspx?ID=53640 &quot;Tổng thống Sài Gòn cũ Nguyễn Văn Thiệu và con đường chiến bại (kỳ III)&quot;], by Phong Hoàn Công, ''Báo Công An Nhân Dân''.
** Original Vietnamese quote: ''Nếu [[United States|họ]] muốn ám sát tôi thì cũng dễ thôi. Rồi sau đó cứ việc đổ cho Việt Cộng hoặc là do âm mưu đảo chính''.

* [[United States|They]] have back-stabbed [[w:South Vietnam|us]].
** {{w|Văn Thiệu Nguyễn}}, as quoted in ''Việt Nam. Cuộc chiến 10.000 ngày. Tập 8 - Hòa bình''.
** Original Vietnamese quote: ''[[United States|Họ]] đã đâm sau lưng chúng tôi''.

* No event in [[American history]] is more misunderstood than the Vietnam War. It was misreported then, and it is misremembered now. Rarely have so many people been so wrong about so much. Never have the consequences of their misunderstanding been so tragic.
** [[Richard Nixon]], as quoted in ''No More Vietnams'' (1987).

*With a Vietnamese baby on your mind.
**New York Dolls, ''Vietnamese Baby''
**The song appears to refer to the Vietnam war [https://oldtimemusic.com/the-meaning-behind-the-song-vietnamese-baby-by-new-york-dolls-2/]

=== O ===

* I also come here with a deep respect for Vietnam's ancient heritage. For millennia, farmers have tended these lands, a history revealed in the ''Đông Sơn'' drums. At this bend in the river, Hanoi has endured for more than a thousand years. The world came to treasure Vietnamese silks and paintings, and a great Temple of Literature stands as a testament to your pursuit of knowledge. And yet, over the centuries, your fate was too often dictated by others. Your beloved land was not always your own. But like bamboo, the unbroken spirit of the Vietnamese people was captured by [[Lý Thường Kiệt]]: &quot;The Southern emperor rules the Southern land. Our destiny is writ in Heaven's Book.&quot;
** [[Barack Obama]], [https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/remarks-hanoi-vietnam Remarks in Hanoi, Vietnam]; 24 May 2016 

===P===
[[File:Pham Doan Trang-Headshot-e1646028486289-332x332.jpg|thumb|I don’t want freedom for just myself; that’s too easy. I want something greater: freedom for Vietnam. ~ Phạm Đoan Trang]]
* I don’t want [[freedom]] for just myself; that’s too easy. I want something greater: freedom for Vietnam. It might seem like some grand goal, but it’s totally possible – with your support.
** {{w|Phạm Đoan Trang}}, as quoted in [https://www.rfa.org/english/news/vietnam/trang-pen-award-04112024231904.html &quot;Jailed Vietnamese writer honored with international award&quot;], ''Radio Free Asia'' (April 11, 2024)

* I used to see Vietnam as a [[war]] rather than a country.
** [[John Pilger]], as quoted in ''Do you remember Vietnam?'' (1978).

===R===

* The decay of the [[Soviet Union|Soviet]] experiment should come as no surprise to us. Wherever the comparisons have been made between free and closed societies -- [[West Germany]] and [[East Germany]], [[Austria]] and [[wikipedia:Czechoslovakia|Czechoslovakia]], [[Malaysia]] and Vietnam -- it is the [[Democracy|democratic]] countries what are prosperous and responsive to the needs of their people. And one of the simple but overwhelming facts of our time is this: Of all the millions of [[Refugee|refugees]] we've seen in the modern world, their flight is always away from, not toward the [[Communism|Communist]] world. Today on the [[NATO]] line, our military forces face east to prevent a possible invasion. On the other side of the line, the Soviet forces also face east to prevent their people from leaving.
** [[Ronald Reagan]], [https://www.reaganlibrary.gov/archives/speech/address-members-british-parliament Address to the Parliament of the United Kingdom], 8 June 1982

===S===
* Vietnam was a single country again. Ho had organised the communist order on political and economic principles which drew on the [[Soviet Union|Soviet]] and [[China|Chinese]] experiences. [[Agriculture]] was [[w:Collectivization|collectivised]]. A network of labour camps was spread across the country and hostile ‘class’ elements were rounded up and forced to abandon their capitalistic sympathies. A strict [[One-party state|one-party]] [[dictatorship]] was imposed. A blend of [[patriotism]] and [[Marxism–Leninism|Marxism-Leninism]] was propagated. The party and the army were reinforced as the combined bastion of the regime. The Democratic Republic of Vietnam had been born in a colonial war and had known nothing but war since obtaining its independence. It was an even more militarised society than the People’s Republic of China. Yet its [[industry]] made hardly any armaments. It had little industry at all and the Americans bombed its few [[factories]] into rubble. Financial support and military supplies from the USSR and China had been crucial for survival. The northerners communised the south after the American withdrawal. Expropriations and arrests accompanied the expansion of the party and army presence across the newly occupied provinces. Within a year or two the southern economy had been pressed into a northern mould. Yet the wartime devastation was everywhere. Vietnam was a land of orphans, invalids, ruined houses, disrupted rice paddies and poisoned forests. Hanoi expressed the wish for a rapprochement, but the departed Americans cut the Vietnamese off from the [[world economy]]. Peace was meant to turn the country into a desert. Although the USSR continued to proffer aid, it was never on a scale adequate for substantial reconstruction.
** Robert Service, ''Comrades: A History of World Communism'' (2009) 
*However, the most cruel mistake occurred with the failure to understand the Vietnam war. Some people sincerely wanted all wars to stop just as soon as possible; others believed that there should be room for national, or communist, self-determination in Vietnam, or in [[Cambodia]], as we see today with particular clarity. But members of the [[United States|U.S.]] [[anti-war movement]] wound up being involved in the betrayal of Far Eastern nations, in a [[genocide]] and in the suffering today imposed on 30 million people there. Do those convinced [[Pacifism|pacifists]] hear the moans coming from there? Do they understand their responsibility today? Or do they prefer not to hear?
**[[Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn]], &quot;[https://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/alexandersolzhenitsynharvard.htm A World Split Apart]&quot; 8 June 1978
* Whatever you think... America wasn't stealing from the Vietnamese. 
** [[Dinesh D'Souza]], ''[[America: Imagine the World Without Her]]'' (2014)

===T===
* This is the largest [[w:Anti-Chinese_sentiment|anti-Chinese]] demonstration I have ever seen in Hanoi. Our patience has limits. We are here to express the will of the Vietnamese people to defend our territory at all costs. We are ready to die to protect our nation.
** A war veteran named Dang Quang Thang told the AFP news agency, [http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-27362939 &quot;Vietnam protestors attack China over sea disuptes&quot;], May 11, 2014.

* All [[Freedom of religion|independent religions]] are banned [in Vietnam].  Only economically speaking we are better [since the collapse of [[South Vietnam]] in [[1975]]].  But politically speaking nothing changes.
** [[w:Thích Quảng Độ|Thích Quảng Độ]]. {{cite video|url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPlL3ngQraQ|title=In My View: Vietnam's Buddhist Monk Thich Quang Do|date=2007-12-20}}

===Z===
*[T]he Vietnamese government does ''not'' mess around. Vietnam is ''not'' a [[democracy]]. It benefits (suffers?) from extensive [[Surveillance|monitoring of civilians]], but unlike the [[Singapore|Singaporean]] techno-state, Vietnam’s system is more akin to an [[Authoritarianism|authoritarian]] neighborhood watch. This system of internal monitoring literally lets state agents go door-to-door demanding answers to invasive questions. 
**[[w:Peter Zeihan|Peter Zeihan]], [https://zeihan.com/the-state-of-the-pandemic-east-asia/ &quot;The State of the Pandemic: East Asia&quot;] (18 June 2020), ''Zeihan on Geopolitics''

* In this struggle we are inspired by the example of those countries where staunch supporters of the [[Socialism|socialist]] option are in power. They are [[China]] which has the world in awe of its spectacular successes in the [[Economy of China|economy]] and the social sphere. [[Cuba]], which the [[American imperialism|US imperialism]] [[United States embargo against Cuba|has vainly tried to strangle for six decades]]. The dynamically developing [[Vietnam]]. These countries challenge [[Capitalism|capitalist]] [[globalization]], refuse to submit to their diktat and score successes on the socialist path. The experience of fraternal [[Byelorussia]] is highly instructive.
** [[Gennady Zyuganov]], [https://cprf.ru/2017/11/socialism-is-genuine-freedom/ &quot;Socialism Is Genuine Freedom&quot;] (22 November 2017)

==See also==
* [[Religion in Vietnam]]
* [[Economy of Vietnam]]
* [[American exceptionalism]]
* [[Crimes against humanity]]
* [[War crimes]]
* [[Smedley Butler|''War is a Racket'', by Smedley Butler (U.S.M.C.)]]

== External links ==
{{similarlinks}}
*{{Wikivoyage-inline}}
[[Category:Vietnam| ]]</text>
      <sha1>phja8u4ewmy1mgfffjfhvn2w55bjvuj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Guru Nanak</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>76164</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964962</id>
      <parentid>3916347</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:23:01Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964962</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="16311" sha1="64qig8pb6d38il7f6y86b390o6m5txi" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Sikh Gurus with Bhai Bala and Bhai Mardana.jpg|thumb|Make [[compassion]] the cotton, [[contentment]] the thread, [[modesty]] the knot and [[truth]] the twist.]]
'''[[w:Guru Nanak|Guru Nanak]]''' ([[April 15|15 April]] [[1469]] – [[September 22|22 September]] [[1539]])  also addressed as  '''Baba Nanak''' or '''Nanak Shah'''  founded the religion of [[Sikhism]]. He was the first of the ten [[w:Sikh Gurus|Sikh Gurus]], while the [[Guru Granth Sahib]] is considered as the eleventh [[guru]]. He travelled widely through out the country propagating the message of one God who dwells in every one of God's creations and constitutes the eternal Truth. His birth is celebrated world-wide on ''[[w:Kartik Poornima|Kartik Puranmashi]]'', the full-moon day which falls on different dates each year in the month of [[w:Kartik|Kartik]], October–November.

== Quotes ==

*Nanak observed: “Justice hath taken wings and fled.” “This age is like a drawn sword, the Kings are butchers; goodness has taken wings and flown.’? “There is no one who receiveth or giveth not bribes; the King administers justice only when his palm has been greased (filled).’(306)
**in RC Majumdar, [https://archive.org/details/mughulempire00bhar Volume 7]: ''The Mughul Empire [1526-1707]''

*Guru Nanak was also an eye-witness to the treatment meted out te the people by Babur when he invaded India in 1521. Nanak was at Sayyidpur, now called Eminabad, 80 kilometres from Lahore, in the Gujranwala District Babur ordered a general massacre of the people and thousands of persons were taken prisoners. The barbarous treatment of prisoners, in the camp, particularly of women, broke the tender heart of Nanak In his agony he even took God to task. He said: &lt;br&gt;“Thou, O Creator of all things, &lt;br&gt;Takest to Thyself no blame; &lt;br&gt;Thou hast sent Yama disguised as the great Moghal, Babar. &lt;br&gt;Terrible was the slaughter, &lt;br&gt;Loud were the cries of the lamenters. &lt;br&gt;Did this not awaken pity in Thee, O Lord? &lt;br&gt;Thou art part and parcel of all things equally, O Creator: &lt;br&gt;Thou must feel for all men and all nations. &lt;br&gt;If a strong man attacketh who is equally strong, &lt;br&gt;Where is the grief in this, or whose is the grievance? &lt;br&gt;But when a fierce tiger preys on the helpless cattle, &lt;br&gt;The Herdsman must answer for it.” (306-7)
**in RC Majumdar, [https://archive.org/details/mughulempire00bhar Volume 7]: ''The Mughul Empire [1526-1707]''

* The impurity of the mind is greed, and the impurity of the tongue is falsehood. The impurity of the eyes is to gaze upon the beauty of another man's wife, and his wealth. The impurity of the ears is to listen to the slander of others. O Nanak, the mortal's soul goes, bound and gagged to the city of Death. All impurity comes from doubt and attachment to duality. Birth and death are subject to the Command of the Lord's Will; through His Will we come and go.
** [[w:Asa di Var|Asa di Var]]

* Make compassion the cotton, contentment the thread, modesty the knot and truth the twist. &lt;br&gt; This is the sacred thread of the soul; if you have it, then go ahead and put it on me.
** ''Raag Aasaa'' 471:5383-4

* Of a woman are we conceived, &lt;br&gt; Of a woman are we born, &lt;br&gt; To a woman are we betrothed and married, &lt;br&gt; It is a woman who keeps the race going, &lt;br&gt; Another companion is sought when the life-partner dies, &lt;br&gt; Through a woman are established social ties. &lt;br&gt; Why should we consider woman cursed and condemned,&lt;br&gt; When from woman are born leaders and rulers.&lt;br&gt; From woman alone is born a woman,&lt;br&gt; Without woman there can be no human birth.&lt;br&gt; Without woman, O Nanak, only the True One exists.&lt;br&gt; Be it man or be it woman,&lt;br&gt; Only those who sing His glory&lt;br&gt; Are blessed and radiant with His Beauty,&lt;br&gt; In His Presence and with His grace&lt;br&gt; They appear with a radiant face.&lt;br&gt;
** Raag Aasaa Mehal 1, p. 473; in ''Aad Guru Granth Sahib'' (1983 edition by Shiromani Gurdwara Parbandhak Committee); also in ''Guru Nanak and His Times'' (1971) by Anil Chandra Banerjee, p. 78 &lt;!-- , and also ''Gandhi: Behind the Mask of Divinity'' (2004) by G. B. Singh &lt;small&gt;  ISBN 1573929980 &lt;/small&gt;  --&gt;

* You shall everywhere mind the book of the [[Granth-Sahib]] as your Guru; whatever you shall ask it will show you.
** As quoted in [http://books.google.com/books?id=c2oAAAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA163&amp;dq#PPA169,M1 ''Religious Thought and Life in India : An Account of the Religions of the Indian Peoples, Based on a Life's Study of Their Literature and on Personal Investigations in Their Own Country'' (1883)] by Monier Monier-Williams

*There is no Hindu, nor any Mussalman.
**This was his first statement after his enlightenment as quoted in ''Journal of Sikh Studies'', Vol. 7, 1-2 (February - August 1980), p. 39; also in [http://www.sikh-history.com/sikhhist/gurus/nanak1.html &quot;Guru Nanak Dev ji (1469 - 1539)&quot;]

*They who wore beautiful tresses &lt;br&gt;and the partings of whose hair were dyed with vermillion &lt;br&gt;Have their locks now shorn with scissors, &lt;br&gt;And dust is now thrown upon their heads. &lt;br&gt;….Eating coconuts and dates they sported on their couches, &lt;br&gt;But now chains are on their necks and broken are their &lt;br&gt;String of pearls. &lt;br&gt;The wealth and beauty which afforded them pleasure &lt;br&gt;have now become their bane. &lt;br&gt;The order was given to Soldiers to take and dishonour them. 
**Guru Nanak, quoted from Ahuja, N.D. N.A. The Great Guru Nanak and the Muslims. Chandigarh: Kirti Publishing House.  page 66,      quoted in Ten heads of ravana : a critique of hinduphobic scholars. (2023). Garuda Prakashan Private Limited.

===Guru Nanak Dev ji (1469 - 1539)===
[[File:GuruNanakFresco-Goindwal.jpg|Fresco of Guru Nanak|thumbnail]]
&lt;small&gt;{{Cite web|url= http://www.sikh-history.com/sikhhist/gurus/nanak1.html|title= Guru Nanak Dev ji (1469 - 1539)|accessdate=14 December 2013|publisher=Sikh History.com}}&lt;/small&gt;
*If Ganges water will reach your ancestors in heaven, why should the water I throw up not reach my fields in the Punjab, which are far less distant ?
*O Lallo, as the words of the Lord come to me, so do I express them.
*The sun and moon, O Lord, are Thy lamps; the firmament Thy salver; the orbs of the stars the pearls encased in it. &lt;br&gt; The perfume of the sandal is Thine incense, the wind is Thy fan, all the forests are Thy flowers, O Lord of light. &lt;br&gt; What worship is this, O Thou destroyer of birth ? Unbeaten strains of ecstasy are the trumpets of Thy worship. &lt;br&gt;Thou has a thousand eyes and yet not one eye; Thou host a thousand forms and yet not one form; &lt;br&gt; Thou hast a thousand stainless feet and yet not one foot; Thou hast a thousand organs of smell and yet not one organ. I am fascinated by this play of 'l hine. &lt;br&gt;The light which is in everything is Chine, O Lord of light.&lt;br&gt;From its brilliancy everything is illuminated; &lt;br&gt;By the Guru's teaching the light becometh manifest.&lt;br&gt; What pleaseth Thee is the real worship. &lt;br&gt;O God, my mind is fascinated with Thy lotus feet as the bumble-bee with the flower; night and day I thirst for them.&lt;br&gt;Give the water of Thy favour to the Sarang (bird) Nanak, so that he may dwell in Thy Name.

===Life Of Guru Nanak: Chapter I===
:&lt;small&gt;Some hymns sung in specific [[w|raaga|ragas]] cited in {{cite web|url=http://www.sacred-texts.com/skh/tsr1/tsr104.htm|title=Life Of Guru Nanak: Chapter I|accessdate14 December 2013|publisher=Sacred Texts.com}}&lt;/small&gt;

* The one Lord who created the world is the Lord of all.&lt;br&gt;Fortunate is their advent into the world, whose hearts remain attached to God's service.&lt;br&gt;O foolish man, why hast thou forgotten Him?&lt;br&gt;When thou adjustest thine account, my friend, thou shalt be deemed educated.&lt;br&gt;The Primal Being is the Giver; He alone is true.&lt;br&gt;No account shall be due by the pious man who understandeth by means of these letters.

* Praise Him whose limit cannot be found.&lt;br&gt; They who practise truth and perform service shall obtain their reward.&lt;br&gt;He who knoweth divine knowledge is the learned pandit.&lt;br&gt;He who knoweth the one God in all creatures would never say 'I exist by myself '.&lt;br&gt;When the hair groweth white, it shineth without soap.&lt;br&gt;King Death's hunters follow him who is bound by the chain of mammon.&lt;br&gt;The Creator, Lord of the world, giveth sustenance to His slaves.&lt;br&gt;All the world is bound in His bonds; no other authority prevaileth.&lt;br&gt;He who hath renounced the singing of God's word, is arrogant in his language.&lt;br&gt;He who fashioned vessels made kilns in which He put them and burnt them.&lt;br&gt;The servant who performeth the Guru's work, who remaineth obedient to His commands,&lt;br&gt;Who deemeth bad and good as the same, shall in this way be absorbed in Him.&lt;br&gt;He who made the four Veds, the four mines, and the four ages&lt;br&gt; Hath been in every age a [[Yogi|Jogi]], a worldly man, or a learned [[w:pandit|pandit]].

{{Disputed begin}}

== Disputed ==

* I have seen the light of [[Muhammad]] (with my mind's eye). I have seen the prophet and the messenger of God, in other words, I have understood his message or imbibed his spirit. After contemplating the glory of God, my ego was completely eliminated.
** Attributed to Guru Nanak, in the [[w:Janamsakhis#Bhai_Bala_Janamsakhi|Janamsakhi of Bhai Bala]]. As quoted in 'Guru Granth Sahib: A Model For Interfaith Understanding', translated by Dr. Kazi Nurul Islam, published in ''Khalsa Samachar'' Volume 22 Issue 43, New Delhi, August 30th, 2012 to September 5th, 2012, page. 8 Viewable here: [https://archive.org/details/KhalsaSamachar-GurubaniIsJagMahiChanNu/page/n7/mode/2up]
**There has been considerable discussion as regards to  [[w:Bhai Bala|Bhai Bala]] 's existence, and the reliability of his Janamsakhi hapiographies.

{{Disputed end}}

==About Guru Nanak==
[[File:SriGuruNanak'sTravels.jpg|thumb|The 5 ''[[w:Udasis|Udasis]]'' and other locations visited by Guru Nanak]]

* Although Guru Nanak’s teachings of equality and tolerance resonate with American audiences and are foundational values for American society, very few of our neighbors and Western society at large know anything about Guru Nanak Dev Ji
** [[d:Q66288744|Gurwin Ahuja]], executive director of the ''National Sikh Campaign'' (NSC) '''[https://www.washingtonpost.com/religion/pbs-documentary-broadcast-part-of-sikh-awareness-campaign/2021/12/10/13c6860a-5a0c-11ec-8396-5552bef55c3c_story.html PBS documentary broadcast part of Sikh awareness campaign]''' (December 10, 2021)

* Guru Nanak’s legacy belongs to all who seek [[truth]] and [[compassion]].
** A. Sahara Alexander (pseudonym), [https://bitterwinter.org/sikh-celebrations-at-nankana-sahib-pakistan-discriminates-against-hindu-pilgrims/ &quot;Sikh Celebrations at Nankana Sahib: Pakistan Discriminates Against Hindu Pilgrims&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (November 12, 2025)

* Nanak's religion consisted in the love of God, love of man and love of godly living. His religion was above the limits of caste, creed and country. He gave his love to all, [[w:Hindus|Hindus]], [[w:Muslims|Muslims]], [[w:Indians|Indians]]  and foreigners alike. His religion was a people's movement based on modern conceptions of secularism and socialism, a common brotherhood of all human beings. Like [[w:Rousseau|Rousseau]], Nanak felt 250 years earlier that it was the common people who made up the human race. They had always toiled and tussled for princes, priests and politicians. What did not concern the common people was hardly worth considering. Nanak's work to begin with assumed the form of an agrarian movement. His teachings were purely in [[w:Punjabi language|Punjabi language]] mostly spoken by cultivators. He appealed to the downtrodden and the oppressed peasants and petty traders as they were ground down between the two mill stones of Government tyranny and the new Muslims' brutality. Nanak's faith was simple and sublime. It was the life lived. His religion was not a system of philosophy like [[w:Hinduism|Hinduism]]. It was a discipline, a way of life, a force, which connected one [[w:Sikh|Sikh]] with another as well as with the Guru.
** Dr H.R. Gupta, the well-known historian in &quot;Guru Nanak Dev ji (1469 - 1539)&quot;.

* In Nanak's time Indian society was based on caste and was divided into countless watertight Compartments. Men were considered high and low on account of their birth and not according to their deeds. Equality of human beings was a dream. There was no spirit of national unity except feelings of community fellowship. In Nanak's views men's love of God was the criterion to judge whether a person was good or bad, high or low. As the caste system was not based on divine love, he condemned it. Nanak aimed at creating a casteless and classless society similar to the modern type of socialist society in which all were equal and where one member did not exploit the other. Nanak insisted that every Sikh house should serve as a place of love and devotion, a true guest house (''Sach dharamshala''). Every Sikh was enjoined to welcome a traveller or a needy person and to share his meals and other comforts with him. &quot;Guru Nanak aimed at uplifting the individual as well as building a nation.
** Dr H.R. Gupta, the well-known historian in &quot;Guru Nanak Dev ji (1469 - 1539)&quot;.

* Shri Babaji shows us the practical side of the teachings of great saints like Guru Nanak, who did not preach a particular religion or cult. He gave teachings of spiritual perfection, valid for all mankind. To follow these teachings is to realize good for all humanity and the unity of all humanity and the unity of the individual soul with the universal Soul.
** Shri Shastriji about [[Haidakhan Babaji]], cited in: ''The Teachings of Babaji'', 10 April 1983.

* Guru Nanak 'called himself a [[Hindu]].  According to Janamsâkhî, he wore a sacred thread (yajñopavît) and had a lock of hair (chotî) on his head.  After him till the fifth Guru, each had his sacred thread ceremony performed, were married according to Vedic rites, used to apply tilak and used to hear tales from Vedas and Puranas.'
** Kshitish Vedalankar: Storm in Punjab, quoted in Elst, Koenraad (2002). Who is a Hindu?: Hindu revivalist views of Animism, Buddhism, Sikhism, and other offshoots of Hinduism. ISBN 978-8185990743

* Guru Nanak's principal inheritance from the religious background of his period was unquestionably that of the Sant tradition, and evidence of other independent influences is relatively slight.&quot;...  [And for the Sant tradition and itself, it] 'owes none of its basic constituents to the Sufis. For Sant beliefs the major source is to be found in the Bhakti movement, with Nath theory entering as a significant source.' 
** W.H. McLeod, quoted in  Ram Swarup, “Hindu Roots of Sikhism”, The Indian Express (6 February 1991); Republished in Hinduism and Monotheistic Religions. 2009. pp. 279-281 ff] , also in  [https://www.academia.edu/1241470/Common_Features_in_the_Development_of_Three_World_Religions]

* We are also told that the Gurus repudiated pilgrimage to holy places. Is it true? Though as a “knower”, Nanak was above pilgrimage, yet he went on an extended pilgrimage, as his Udasis tell us, to Hardwar, Prayag, Varanasi, Gorkhmat (near Pilibhit), Ayodhya, Jagannatha Puri, Rameshwaram, Ujjain, Kurukshetra, Hinglaj, Gorakh-Hatri (a great Natha center near modern Peshawar). At Mathura, he visited Keshaav Rao Temple and bathed in the Yamuna.
** Ram Swarup, Hinduism and monotheistic religions (2009)

==See also==
*[[Guru Arjan]]
*[[Guru Tegh Bahadur]]

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
*[http://www.aboutsikhism.org/guru%20nanak.html Profile at aboutsikhism.org]
*[http://www.sikh-history.com/sikhhist/gurus/nanak1.html Guru Nanak Dev ji (1469 - 1539)]
*[http://www.srigurunanaksahib.org Eternal Glory of Sri Guru Nanak Dev]
*[http://www.sacred-texts.com/skh/tsr1/index.htm Max Arthur MacAuliff, ''The Sikh Religion, Vol 1, (The Life of Guru Nanak Dev Ji)'', Oxford University Press, 1909.]
*[http://www.san.beck.org/GPJ7-Sufis.html  ''Sufis, Philosophers, and Nanak'']
*[http://www.san.beck.org/GPJ7-Sufis.html#5 ''Nanak and the Sikhs'']
*[http://www.gurmat.info/sms/smspublications/gurunanakforchildren/ Satguru Nanak Dev Ji (for Children)]

[[Category:Religious leaders]]
[[Category:Founders of religions]]
[[Category:Sikhs]]
[[Category:1469 births]]
[[Category:1539 deaths]]
[[Category:Punjabi people]]</text>
      <sha1>64qig8pb6d38il7f6y86b390o6m5txi</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Backyardigans</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>86660</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964910</id>
      <parentid>3964385</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:45:26Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39683-94</username>
        <id>3350039</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Season 2 */</comment>
      <origin>3964910</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="33304" sha1="1ykbad6ln6t1ott7wt4wlmzjl8p4qlg" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:The Backyardigans|The Backyardigans]]''''' is an American Canadian 3D-animated children's TV series, created by [[w:Janice Burgess|Janice Burgess]] and produced by [[w:Nelvana|Nelvana]]. Music for the show is written by [[w:Evan Lurie|Evan Lurie]], of [[w:The Lounge Lizards|The Lounge Lizards]], and Douglas Wieselman. The characters are designed by children's book author and illustrator [[w:Dan Yaccarino|Dan Yaccarino]]. The series premiered on October 11, 2004 on [[w:Nickelodeon|Nickelodeon]]'s [[w:Nick Jr. (block)|Nick Jr.]] block in the [[w:United States|United States]].
__TOC__
&lt;!-- Replace the above line by __NOTOC__ if you want to create a custom table of contents and the following conditions hold:
1. The show is no longer active.
2. There is a large number of episodes (over 50). --&gt;

==Season 1==
===''Knights are Brave and Strong'' [1.1]===
:'''Tasha''': Hello and good day to you. I'm Queen Tasha, the rule of everything.
:''[Queen Tasha sends Uniqua the page on a mission to deliver a secret message to King Austin.]''
:'''Uniqua''': Oh, Queen, nothing can stop me from delivering this message. I hope.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pablo''': Stay away from my hood!
:''[This is a reference to [[w:Gandalf|Gandalf's]] jungles &quot;You shall not pass!&quot;]''

===''The Yeti'' [1.2]===
:''[Uniqua, Tyrone, and Tasha set out on a journey to the Frozen North to find the Yeti - Pablo.]''
:'''Tasha''': I'll race you to the other side.
:'''Uniqua''': I'll beat you to the other side.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': Ready, set, go!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': Come on.
:'''Tasha''': Oh, for goodness sakes.

=== ''Pirate Treasure'' [1.3] ===

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pablo''': ''[singing]'' What do you do with a scurvy pirate?
:'''Tyrone''': ''[singing]'' Raid their ship and then hot-wire it.
:'''Pablo''': ''[singing]'' What do you do with a scurvy pirate?
:'''Tyrone and Pablo''': ''[singing]'' Make them walk the plank!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' What do you do with a scurvy pirate?
:'''Austin''': ''[singing]'' Load the cannon up and fire it.
:'''Uniqua and Austin''': ''[singing]'' What do you do with a scurvy pirate? Make them walk the plank!
:'''Tyrone''': ''[singing]'' We'll raid their scurvy pirate ship, and make them walk the plank!
:'''Pablo''': ''[singing]'' We'll grab up all their treasure,
:'''Tyrone and Pablo''': ''[singing]'' And put it in the bank!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' What do you do with a scurvy pirate?
:'''Austin''': ''[singing]'' Load the cannon up and fire it.
:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' What do you do with a scurvy pirate?
:'''Tyrone and Pablo''': ''[singing]'' Make them walk the plank!

=== ''The Heart of the Jungle'' [1.4] ===
:''[The three Tarzans (Pablo, Tyrone, and Austin) and Scientist Uniqua set off on a journey to the heart of the jungle to return Sherman the Wormin to his home.]''
:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' These trees look so familiar, we've been here once before.
:'''Tyrone''': You're right except it wasn't once.
:'''Pablo''': It was three times.
:'''Austin''': Or four. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Austin comes to the large fern leaf, which has hit him in the head the past two times they've gone past. He ducks, and it misses.]''
:'''Austin''': Ugh!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Austin''': Quicksand bad.

=== ''Secret Mission'' [1.5] ===
:''[Secret Agents Pablo, Uniqua, and Tyrone must return the mystery object to its rightful owner in the museum.]''
:'''Pablo''': Secret agents go on secret missions and we have background music. Sneaky background music: ''de de doo''. Danger background music: ''dum, dum, DUM.'' And if we goof up: ''Wahh wahh wahh.'' But no matter what happens, a secret agents always stays cool. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tyrone''': This certainly is a long short cut.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': ''[smiles]'' Spy rope time again! ''[shoots her rope upwards]'' Grab hold, agents! Going up!
:''[Sooner as they were going up to where they started by the entrance, the dinosaur skull speaks to them]''
:'''Dinosaur skull''': ''[salutes the trio]'' Thanks for my toe.
:'''All''': You're welcome.
:'''Pablo''': ''[smiles]'' Just doing our job.
:''[A few seconds later, Pablo, Uniqua and Tyrone arrive back at the museum entrance outside]''
:'''Pablo''': ''[to his fellow agents]'' Mission accomplished, secret agents. Snack time?
:'''Tyrone''': ''[his belly growls]'' Snack time.

=== ''Riding the Range'' [1.6] ===
:''[Tyrone heads to Texas for the hoedown, while Tasha, Uniqua, and Pablo track down a jump-rope thief - who is actually an unwary Tyrone.]''
:'''Uniqua''': The bandit must have jumped across on his horse.
:'''Pablo''': Now that's one clever varmint.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': ''[as they stopped by the front door]'' Here goes... ''[takes a deep breath then calls out to the bandit]'' BANDIT! ''[cut to Tyrone sleeping on a small bed inside]'' Bandit! We got you, bandit!
:''[The sound of Uniqua's voice soon woke Tyrone up in alarm]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[takes notice of the commotion outside]'' WHOA! They got the bandit cornered on the porch. ''[his expression turns into shock]'' What if he tries to get in here?! ''[gets off the bed]'' I better sneak out the back. ''[He hightails it out of the cabin through the back door]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pablo''': See you later.
:'''Tasha''': See you later.
:'''Uniqua''': See you next time.
:'''Tyrone''': See you.

=== ''The Key to the Nile'' [1.7] ===
:''[When the Nile River in ancient Egypt disappears, Princess CleoTasha takes her three servants out to find three presents for the Sphinx, so that she can tell them the secret of the Nile and get the river back.]''

:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' 'Please' and 'thank you', that's the secret of the Nile!
:'''Pablo, Tyrone and Austin''': ''[singing]'' 'Please' and 'thank you' gets you practically anything you want with a smile!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' Even princesses should try to be polite. 'Please' and 'thank you', they're just right, so don't be rude!
:'''Tasha''': ''[singing]'' 'Please' and 'thank you' are not things I usually say, but since you insist, I'll start to say them much more often as of today. Who exactly should I say these phrases to?
:'''Uniqua''': ''[singing]'' How 'bout those three guys who do the work for you?
:'''Tasha''': ''[singing]'' Thank you guys for knowing where the special gifts were hid!
:'''Pablo, Tyrone and Austin''': ''[singing]'' You're welcome!
:'''Tasha''': ''[singing]'' And thank you guys for helping me find them like you did!
:'''Pablo, Tyrone and Austin''': ''[singing]'' You're welcome!
:'''Tasha''': ''[singing]'' And thank you guys for doing all that other servant work!
:'''Pablo, Tyrone and Austin''': ''[singing]'' You're welcome!
:'''Tasha''': ''[singing]'' And please forgive me if I acted kind of like a jerk.
:'''Pablo, Tyrone and Austin''': ''[singing]'' That's okay.
:'''Uniqua and Tasha''': ''[singing]'' 'Please' and 'thank you', that's the secret of the Nile, 'please' and 'thank you' get you...
:'''Pablo, Tyrone and Austin''': ''[singing]'' Practically anything you want with a smile.
:'''All''': Egypt's nice when we all try to be polite. Please' and 'thank you' are just right, 'you're welcome', too!

=== ''The Snow Fort'' [1.8] ===
:'''Uniqua and Tasha''': Ski patrol to the rescue!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Mounties Tyrone and Pablo defend the world's biggest snowball while Ski Patrollers Uniqua and Tasha look for someone to save.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Pablo, Tyrone, Uniqua, and Tasha scream]''
:'''Pablo and Tyrone''': Help!

=== ''It's Great to Be a Ghost!'' [1.9] ===
:''[Tyrone then leaned against the wall next to the suit of armor, suddenly. There was a mechanical noise and the wall turns around 180 degrees taking Tyrone and the suit of armor on the stand with it]''
:'''Tyrone''': Woooah!
:''[Then it stopped with an echoing slam the other side of the wall shows a blue wall with a painting of a woman on it. Tyrone is now in a mysterious bedroom with blue wall paper. He gasped in shock, and he starts to walk and looks around the room trying to figure out where he is. He turns and walks backwards. He bumps into a sheet-covered mirror and gasped as he fell over and then the sheet lands on top of Tyrone. Tyrone gets up with a sheet on him, making him look like a ghost. Tyrone turns to the mirror]'' 
:'''Tyrone''': ''[screaming]'' A ghost! HELP! HELP ME! ''[he starts running around]'' A ghost got me! Help! It's a ghost. ''[he stops and looks at the mirror again]'' Huh? Hey, wait a minute. ''[he flies up and down and see that the ghost does it too. He takes off the sheet and looks at the viewers]'' It's me! ''[he puts back on the sheet]'' ''I'm'' the spooky ghost! ''[he looks in the mirror and flies up again. He starts flying around]'' Woo-oooo-oooo... ''[laughs]'' BOO! ''[laughs louder]''
:'''Tasha''': ''[muffled, &quot;offscreen&quot;]'' Tyrone! Come out, come out wherever you are!
:'''Tyrone''': ''[takes off the sheet again and whispers]'' I'm gonna scare them.
:''[Cut to Tasha, Pablo and Uniqua making it upstairs]''
:'''Tasha''': ''[calls out to Tyrone]'' Scary or not, here I come!
:''[The three were still looking for Tyrone when suddenly, the wall turned around again, and Tyrone comes out from behind it. Pablo and Uniqua's eyes widen in shock when they took notice of what came out from behind the wall]''
:'''Uniqua and Pablo''': ''[horrified gasps]''
:'''Tasha''': ''[puzzled]'' What? ''[turns around too late]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[lets out a big scare]'' BOO!
:'''All''': ''[screaming in horror]''
:'''Tasha''': ''[terrified]'' IT'S A GHOST! ''[runs past Uniqua and Pablo]'' GET OUT OF MY WAY, IT'S A GHOST!
:'''Tyrone''': ''[scaring Uniqua and Pablo]'' Boo!
:''[Pablo and Uniqua scream in shock then hightail it to the stairs as Tyrone begins chasing them]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[in a spooky voice]'' '''I am a scary ghost and I'm haunting you!'''
:''[Tasha, Pablo and Uniqua hid behind a couch and Tyrone floated by them, but it didn't take long for Tyrone to find them right away shivering in their shoulders]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[as Tasha sees him next to her]'' Boo!
:''[The three scream in shock then make a break for it towards the staircase]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[giggles]''
:''[Tasha, Uniqua and Pablo try to run upstairs, but Tyrone made it up first]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[stands in front of them]'' Boo!
:''[They all scream in terror and run back down]''
:'''Tyrone''': ''[giggles quietly]''
:'''Pablo''': ''[as he and Uniqua fled out the front doors]'' RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!
:'''Tyrone''': ''[scares Tasha]'' BOO!
:''[Tasha was really frightened now. She ran back up to the upper hallway and opened a door to a closet then closes it. Just as the closet door closed, Tyrone bumped into the door as he couldn't phase through things with the sheet on him and the white sheet flew off of Tyrone as he continually said 'Boo!', revealing his true form]''
:'''Tyrone''': Boo! ''[repeats as Tasha yelps]''
:''[Pablo and Uniqua floated back inside and they suddenly noticed something]''
:'''Pablo''': ''[realizing something]'' Hey, wait a minute. ''[sees that the ghost is really Tyrone]'' It's just Tyrone!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[in realization]'' Yeah, he was spooky ghost this whole time.
:''[Cut to Tyrone booing as Uniqua and Pablo floated up to him]''
:'''Uniqua''': ''[to Tyrone]'' Hey, Tyrone! ''[Tyrone continues booing]'' Hello?
:'''Uniqua and Pablo''': ''[in unison]'' '''Tyrone'''!
:'''Tyrone''': ''[stops booing and looks behind him]'' Yeah?
:'''Uniqua''': ''[to Tyrone]'' You can stop booing now.
:'''Pablo''': Tyrone, we know it's you!
:'''Tasha''': ''[puzzled]'' ''Tyrone?'' ''[comes out of the closet and saw him]'' Tyrone! You're the scary ghost?
:'''Tyrone''': Yup.
:'''Tasha''': ''[surprised]'' Wow! You really had me scared.
:'''Pablo''': Yeah, Tyrone, we were scared too.
:'''Uniqua''': You're a really good ghost!
:'''Tyrone''': ''[smiles]'' Thanks.
:'''Pablo''': ''[impressed]'' It's great being in a haunted house.
:'''Tyrone''': ''[close-up of him]'' And it's especially great if you're a ghost.
:'''Mysterious voice''': ''[deep tone, offscreen]'' '''It's great to be a ghost!'''
:''[Tyrone, Tasha, Pablo and Uniqua's eyes widen in shock, they looked around trying to figure out where the voice came from]''
:'''Uniqua''': ''[worried]'' Who said that?
:'''Pablo''': ''[stammers worryingly]'' Er... Who wants snacks at my house?

=== ''Viking Voyage'' [1.10] === 
:''[Vikings Pablo, Tyrone, and Uniqua seek to discover uncharted lands, though Mermaid Tasha has other ideas.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:

=== ''The Quest for the Flying Rock'' [1.11] ===
:''[Four explorers find a mysterious map for the legendary Flying Rock atop Stone Step Hill (really a pyramid), but upon a disagreement on what path to choose, Uniqua and Tasha compete with Pablo and Tyrone on a race filled with unknown obstacles.]''
:'''All''': ''[reciting the spell and singing]'' Oh rock, oh rock on hilltop high! 

=== ''Surf's Up'' [1.12] ===
:''[Surfer Pablo is on the lookout for Tiki Beach to ride the perfect wave, but he can't find it. Little does Pablo know that he must learn a lot of radical moves before he can find that place and ride the perfect wave, and he will only do that with the help of other fellow surfers and a mysterious lifeguard, Austin.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Pablo''': Hey, lifeguard dude! Do you know where Tiki Beach is?
:'''Austin''': You're looking for Tiki Beach?
:'''Pablo''': Totally. I wanna surf the perfect wave.
:'''Austin''': Well, you gotta have rad moves to surf Tiki Beach.
:'''Pablo''': ''[to the viewers]'' I guess lifeguards like to call everybody dude, too. ''[back to Austin]'' No ''problemo,'' dude. Check this out! ''[does the monkey move]''
:'''Austin''': Dude, that's the monkey. Anybody can do the monkey. That's not a radical move.
:'''Pablo''': Oh. Well, how about this? ''[does the twist move]''
:'''Austin''': That's just the twist. That's not a rad move either.
:'''Pablo''': Oh. Hmm… Well, not everybody can do this! ''[does the triple whip]''
:'''Austin''': The triple whip, huh? Now ''that's'' a rad move.
:'''Pablo''': Totally!
:'''Austin''': What else can you do?
:'''Pablo''': Uh, well, that's the only rad move I know.
:'''Austin''': You need ''all'' rad moves to surf Tiki Beach, dude. Not just one.
:'''Pablo''': Bummer. But I still wanna find Tiki Beach.
:'''Austin''': Well, it could be up north, or it could be down south…
:'''Pablo''': This lifeguard's being kind of mysterious. So which way should I go, dude?
:'''Austin''': Hmm, try that way. ''[points to the right]'' Look for the tall trees.
:'''Pablo''': Tall trees. Okay, thanks, dude! Later! ''[walks to his dune buggy and drives away]''
:'''Austin''': ''[to the viewers]'' Actually, Tiki Beach ''isn't'' that way. I tricked him. I couldn't tell him where it really is. Because he just doesn't have the moves yet. He's got a lot to learn before he can surf Tiki Beach.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Tyrone''': Where'd he go? 
:'''Uniqua''': We lost him! 
:'''Pablo''': Aw, man! Now we'll never find Tiki Beach! 
:'''All''': Bummer. 
:'''Pablo''': We've looked everywhere. 
:'''Tyrone''': Up north and down south. 
:'''Uniqua''': This-a-way and that-a-way. 
:'''Pablo''': Where can it be? ''[takes off his tiki charm]'' Where is it?! Where is Tiki Beach?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': It's that mystery lifeguard! 
:'''Tyrone''': Dude, you tried to keep us from finding Tiki Beach! 
:'''Pablo''': Yeah. Why did you keep steering us wrong? 
:'''Austin''': I had to. I'm not just a mystery lifeguard. I'm the guardian of Tiki Beach. I make sure that only surfers who know ''all'' the rad moves can find Tiki Beach. 
:'''Pablo''': We've got rad moves, dude! 
:'''Uniqua''': Totally! We can do the runaround. 
:'''Tyrone''': And the funk-a-dilly! 
:'''Pablo''': And the triple whip! We've got all the rad moves, dude! 
:'''Austin''': You do, huh? 
:'''All''': Totally! 
:'''Austin''': Well, then, dudes and dudette, surf's up!

=== ''Race to the Tower of Power'' [1.13] ===
:''[Two wicked supervillains, Dr. Shrinky (Tyrone) and Yucky-Man (Pablo) are intent on stealing the Key to the World, which lies inside the Tower of Power, and taking over the world.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Austin''': Where do you think you're going?
:'''Pablo''': Uh… to the Tower of Power so we can rule the world?
:'''Uniqua''': Oh, no, you don't. We'll catch you.
:'''Pablo &amp; Tyrone''': RUN!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Austin''': How are we gonna catch those supervillains?
:'''Uniqua''': Hmm… ''[gets an idea]'' I know! Build us a boat, Captain Hammer.
:'''Austin''': ''[baffled]'' A boat? What good will that do on the ice?
:'''Uniqua''': There's no time to explain. Trust me.
:'''Austin''': Well, okay.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pablo''': ''[pacing back and forth; freaking out]'' No, oh, no! They're getting ahead of us! We're going backward, they're going forward… 
:'''Tyrone''': Pablo?
:'''Pablo''': Yup. They're gonna get there first. What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do?
:'''Tyrone''': PABLO!
:'''Pablo''': Yeah?
:'''Tyrone''': There's only one thing we ''can'' do!
:'''Pablo''': What's that?
:'''Tyrone''': Think!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Pablo and Tyrone run up to the entrance of the tower]''
:'''Pablo''': We made to the tower! Now we just need to get to the top and grab the key.
:'''Tyrone''': ''[sees Austin and Uniqua coming towards them]'' But here come the superheroes! What will we do?
:'''Pablo''': I know! We'll fake 'em out! Let's pretend to be tired and then, when they fall for our trick, we'll get 'em! ''[he and Tyrone laugh wickedly]'' Here they come!
:''[They start pretending to catch their breath as the superheroes approach them]''
:'''Uniqua''': Supervillains, HALT!
:'''Pablo''': ''[panting]'' It's okay… You win, superheroes.
:'''Tyrone''': ''[panting]'' We're too tired… to climb the tower. You guys go ahead.
:'''Austin''': Great! Now's our chance! ''[walks towards the entrance]''
:'''Pablo''': Now, Dr. Shrinky!
:'''Tyrone''': (My pleasure.) Captain Hammer, SHRINK! ''[zaps his rays at Austin, shrinking him]''
:'''Uniqua''': ''[horrified]'' Captain Hammer!
:'''Austin''': ''[in high-pitched voice]'' Uh-oh!
:'''Uniqua''': You ''shrunk'' Captain Hammer?!
:'''Austin''': I'm here!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[picks him up]'' Are you okay?
:'''Austin''': Yes, I'm fine. But the villains are going in the tower.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': Now what are we gonna do?
:'''Austin''': We've got to stop them!
:'''Uniqua''': What?
:'''Austin''': We've got to stop them!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[puts her hand to her ear for better listening]'' What?
:'''Austin''': I said, we've got to stop them!
:'''Uniqua''': ''[understanding]'' Oh. Yes, you're right. But they shrunk you.
:'''Austin''': I know they did. But I'm ''still'' a brave superhero and we've got to stop them.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uniqua''': Not so fast, supervillains!
:'''Pablo &amp; Tyrone''': ''[shocked]'' Weather Woman!
:'''Austin''': You'll never get the key!
:'''Pablo''': ''[puts his hand to his ear; confused]'' What?
:'''Austin''': You'll never get the key!
:'''Tyrone''': What?
:'''Uniqua''': ''[slightly annoyed]'' He said, you'll never get the key!
:'''Pablo &amp; Tyrone''': ''[understanding]'' Oh.
:'''Pablo''': Nonsense! You and your teensy, weensy friend can't defeat us now!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Uniqua uses the key to reflect the supervillains' powers back at them, and Austin bangs his hammer on a paper clip, building a cage around them]''
:'''Uniqua''': We've got you now!
:'''Austin''': The Key to the World is safe!
:'''Uniqua''': We've saved the world from your evil plot.
:'''Tyrone''': ''[in high-pitched voice]'' We're tiny.
:'''Pablo''': ''[also in high-pitched voice]'' And gooey.
:'''Austin''': What?
:'''Uniqua''': We can't hear you.

=== ''Castaways'' [1.14] ===
:''[Uniqua, Tyrone, and Pablo are castaways on a deserted island, and as they struggle to find food and a place to live, they receive mysterious help. Could it be a mischievous intruder, or just a fellow castaway, maybe Austin, who's too shy to say hello to the others?]''

=== ''Cave Party'' [1.15] ===
:''[The Mountain Cave People — Austin and Tasha — invite the Valley Cave People — Uniqua, Pablo, and Tyrone — to howl at the moon when it hits the highest peak. While the three Valley Cave People must get there on time, the two Mountain Cave People must fill their time, all with the help of handy new inventions.]''
:'''Uniqua''': Ugh!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

:''[The three Valley Cave People are climbing a hill and when they reach the top]''
:'''Pablo''': Whoa! I mean, ugh! That's a long way down.
:'''Tyrone''': You know what we need? Something to help us get down this hill.
:'''Uniqua''': Yeah, something we can ride on, and go fast.
:'''Pablo''': Yeah. And it should be red.
:'''Tyrone''': Ughxactly. So that's why I invented this. 
:'''Pablo''': Great invention.
:'''Uniqua''': Awesome.
:'''Pablo''': Great invention.
:'''Uniqua''': Really cool!
:'''Pablo''': What do you call it, the button?
:'''Tyrone''': Nope.
:'''Uniqua''': The rice cake?
:'''Tyrone''': Nope, I call it the sled.
:'''Uniqua, &amp; Pablo''': Ugh!
:'''Pablo''': Ughxcellent choice.
:'''Uniqua''': Good name.
:'''Uniqua, &amp; Pablo''': The sled.
:'''Tyrone''': Hop on. Now let's ugh.
:'''All Three''': Ugh!
:''[The three Valley Cave People ride the sled down the hill]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;

:''[The three Valley Cave People are climbing the stairs Uniqua invented up the mountain.]''
:'''Uniqua''': Next time... I'm gonna invent... the elevator.

=== ''High Tea'' [1.16] ===
:'''Tasha''': Come along! Don't dawdle!
:'''Tyrone''': Okay!
:'''Pablo''': We'll be right there!

=== ''Race Around the World'' [1.17] ===
:'''Austin''': ''[runs up to Uniqua after injuring her knee from jumping over the last hurdle]'' Uniqua, are you okay?
:'''Uniqua''': I hurt my knee.
:'''Austin''': Hey, I've got a bandage here in my race pack. ''[puts the bandage on her knee]''
:'''Uniqua''': ''[feeling much better]'' Thanks, Austin. 
:'''Austin''': You're welcome. I've got everything a racer needs right here in my pack. 
:'''Uniqua''': I never thought I'd need a bandage. 
:'''Austin''': You can never tell what will happen in a race. That's why I like to be prepared. 
:'''Uniqua''': Good point. 
:'''Austin''': Now let's get back in the race. 
:'''Uniqua''': Okay!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Austin''': ''[approaches Pablo, Tyrone, and Uniqua, all resting up against a cactus, looking really exhausted]'' Hey. Why did you guys stop hiking? 
:'''Uniqua''': Because it's too hot. 
:'''Pablo''': And it's too dry. 
:'''Tyrone''': And we're too thirsty. 
:'''Austin''': I can help. How about some water?

=== ''Polka Palace Party'' [1.18] ===
:'''Tyrone''': Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Howdy! It's me, Cowboy Tyrone, And this is my tuba. Listen to this...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Cowboys Tyrone, Uniqua, Pablo and Austin—united by a shared love of polka music—need to get to Cheyenne by sundown in order to play at a surprise birthday party for Sherman the Worman's brother Herman.]''

=== ''Monster Detectives'' [1.19] ===
:'''Tyrone''': Hmm... interesting. Might be a case of missing soccerball. Let's investigate.
:'''Pablo''': Soccer Monster gets the ball. He passes it outfield to... Soccer Monster!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tyrone''': This game's over! You've snitched your last ball, Soccer monster! By order of the monster detective agency, I order you to give it back to its rightful owner!

== Season 2 ==
===''Mission to Mars'' [2.01]===

===''Samurai Pie'' [2.02]===
:'''Tyrone''': ''[annoyed]'' I cannot believe you mentioned the great pie!
:'''Austin''': Don't worry. I know we can make it. Pie-ya! ''[makes a karate pose]''
:'''Tyrone''': No, not &quot;we.&quot; '''''You.'''''
:'''Austin''': Huh?
:'''Tyrone''': Making this pie was ''your'' idea, so you shall make this pie.
:'''Austin''': But…
:'''Tyrone''': No buts. If you wanna be a master pie maker (like me), ''this'' is your true test. Make the great pie.
:''[Austin gulps nervously]''

===''Scared of You'' [2.03]===
:'''Austin''': ''[enters the backyard, carrying a beaker of blue liquid; to the viewers]'' Hi, I'm Austin. ''[gestures to Tasha, as a mad scientist]'' And that's my boss, Mad Scientist Tasha. I help her create stuff in our laboratory. ''[realizing something]'' Oh, and guess what... Today is my birthday! ''[walks to the table]'' Hey, mad scientist, do you remember what today is? 
:'''Tasha''': Of course I do. 
:'''Austin''': You do?! Oh, great! 
:'''Tasha''': Today is the day that I make my maddest, craziest, most brilliant creation ever! ''[laughs like a mad scientist]''
:'''Austin''': Oh... So, what creation is that? 
:'''Tasha''': I can't tell you that, it's a secret.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tasha''': ''[to the viewers, revealing that she '''did''' remember Austin's birthday, as he leaves with secret letters to the mummy king, werewolf, and vampire]'' He is going to be ''so'' surprised!
:'''Austin''': ''[sighs sadly]'' This is the worst birthday ever.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Austin''': ''[annoyed]'' Oh, brother. ''[walks up to Mummy King Tyrone's sarcophagus and knocks on the door]'' Excuse me, but I am not a monster.
:'''Tyrone''': You're not? Huh. I guess you don't ''look'' like a monster.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Austin, Mummy King Tyrone, and Werewolf Uniqua arrive at Vampire Pablo's castle]''
:'''Uniqua''': It's spooky in here. 
:'''Tyrone''': It certainly is. 
:'''Austin''': There's a sign. It's a very good thing I read vampire. It says... ''[reading]'' &quot;Warning: Do not go up the stairs!&quot; 
:'''Tyrone''': Sounds good to me. 
:'''Uniqua''': ''[agreeing]'' yup! 
:'''Austin''': Nice try, monsters. Now come on. ''[they walk up the stairs and find another sign; reading]'' &quot;Okay, you asked for it.&quot;
:'''Tyrone &amp; Uniqua''': Asked for what?
:''[They see the stairs starting to collapse]''
:'''Austin''': '''''RUN!!!'''''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Austin''': ''[turns around, noticing that Mummy King Tyrone, Werewolf Uniqua, and Vampire Pablo are out of his sight]'' Mummy King? Werewolf? Vampire?! They're gone! This is the worst birthday ever. ''[sighs sadly]'' Well, I guess I better tell the mad scientist that I lost all the monsters. ''[opens the laboratory door]'' Hello? Mad Scientist? ''[enters the laboratory and the door closes]'' Why is it so dark?
:''[The lights turn on and the room is decorated in birthday balloons and streamers]''
:'''Tasha, Pablo, Tyrone &amp; Uniqua''': Happy Birthday, Austin!
:'''Austin''': ''[gasps in surprise]'' A birthday party? For ''me?! [to Tasha; overjoyed]'' I can't believe you remembered! 
:'''Tasha''': Of course I remembered, Austin. How could I forget your birthday? 
:'''Austin''': I thought this was gonna be a terrible birthday, but it's the ''best'' birthday ever!

===''The Legend of the Volcano Sisters'' [2.05]===
:'''Uniqua &amp; Tasha''': NOW… &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''GO!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[blows Pablo, Tyrone, and Austin out of the volcano with their strong lungs, sending them back down towards the beach]''
:'''Austin''': Those Volcano Sisters sure have powerful lungs.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tyrone''': The pearl is guarded by a very angry clam.
:'''Pablo''': No clam is too angry for a swimmer as swift as I am.

===''The Swamp Creature'' [2.07]===

===''Best Clowns in Town'' [2.15]===
:'''Tyrone''': ''[incredibly enraged]'' '''''CLOWNS!!!!!''''' ''[echoes]'' I am so mad! You made me miss my train! I have a circus to lead tonight in big city, but I won't ''be'' there because of... '''''CLOWNS!!!!!''''' ''[echoes]'' 
:'''Pablo''': Somebody call for clowns?
:'''Uniqua''': Don't worry, Ringmaster Tyrone.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pablo''': Let me guess. Clowns?
:'''Tyrone''': Yep. '''''CLOWNS!!!!!''''' ''[his furious scream echoes throughout the land, with the camera moves farther and farther away by the four]'' I give up.

===''A Giant Problem'' [2.20]===

== Season 3 ==
=== ''Match on Mt. Olympus'' [3.12] ===
=== ''Caveman's Best Friend'' [3.14] ===
:'''Pablo''': ''[after ordering Austin and Uniqua to pull over; sternly]'' Do you know why I stopped you?
:'''Austin''': Um, because you wanted to say hi?
:'''Pablo''': Yes. Hi! But also because you were driving too fast.
:'''Austin''': Sorry, officer.
:'''Pablo''': ''[to Uniqua]'' And you were riding around on a dinosaur.
:'''Uniqua''': Sorry, officer.
:'''Austin''': That's ''my'' dinosaur, officer. He's just a puppy and he ran away.
:'''Pablo''': Hmmm... A runaway dinosaur, you say?

=== ''Robin Hood the Clean'' [3.16] ===
:'''Austin''': ''[locking the bar of soap in the dungeon, along with the other cleaning supplies; grumpily]'' I ''hate'' clean!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Austin''': What did you do to my fountain, villager?!
:'''Pablo''': I cleaned it up, and I'm ''not'' a villager. ''[takes off his disguise]'' I'm Robin Hood the Clean!
:'''Tyrone''': It's about time.
:'''Pablo''': ''[demanding]'' Let the villagers go, Stinky Pants, so they can take a bath!
:'''Austin''': ''No one'' is allowed to be cleaned in Filthingham… not even ''you!''

=== ''Escape from Fairytale Village'' [3.17] ===
:''[After Tyrone's bicycle gets a flat tire, Austin the Friendly Wolf jumps out of the bushes, frightening him]''
:'''Austin''': ''[cheerfully]'' Hello there! ''[Tyrone screams again]'' I'm Austin the Wolf.
:'''Tyrone''': ''[screams]'' Austin the what?
:'''Austin''': Austin the Wolf. ''[shakes hands with him; honored]'' You must be the new paper boy. Welcome to Fairytale Village!
:'''Tyrone''': Fairytale Village?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Austin''': ''[to the viewers after Tyrone throws a newspaper at him and called him a big bad wolf; confused]'' Big bad wolf? I may be big, but I'm not bad. I just want to blow up his tire. Hey! Wait up! ''[chases after him]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Tyrone''': ''[walking up to the gingerbread house]'' Is that… candy? And cookies? And gumdrops? ''[gasps at the house]'' And the house is made of gingerbread! Who in the world lives here?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Pablo''': ''[waving cheerfully down at Tyrone as a friendly giant]'' Hello, paper boy! How's it going?
:'''Tyrone''': ''[gasps fearfully]'' Yikes! Giant!
:'''Pablo''': Fee fi fo feek! ''[to the viewers]'' I think he wants to play hide and seek.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Pablo''': I'm gonna get you!
:'''Tyrone''': No! Leave me alone!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Tyrone''': A wolf, a witch, and a giant? I'm getting out of here.

=== ''Pirate Camp'' [3.18] ===

== Season 4 ==
=== ''Flower Power'' [4.6] ===
:'''Uniqua''': ''[notices a thorny stem flower that hasn't bloomed yet]'' What kind of flower is that? The poor little thing hasn't opened. Maybe it needs some extra sunlight! ''[takes the pot and places it in the window, and the flower suddenly sprouts; amazed]'' Whoa!
:'''Pablo''': Wow! That flower's never bloomed before.
:'''Uniqua''': It's beautiful! I wonder what it smells like. ''[accidentally pricks her finger on one of the thorns]'' Ow!
:'''Pablo''': Are you all right?
:'''Uniqua''': I'm fine. I poked my finger on a thorn, that's all. Happens every day in my line of work.
:'''Pablo''': Yeah, mine too. Well, better get back to work. Thanks for the flowers, Gardener Pablo. ''[suddenly shoots a beam of flowers on the floor from her hand]'' Yikes!
:'''Pablo''': ''[gasps in surprise]'' How'd you do that?!
:'''Uniqua''': I don't know. ''[shoots out some fireworks]'' Look out! I'm so sorry. I don't know what... ''[accidentally sprays pollen at Pablo, causing him to sneeze uncontrollably]'' 
:'''Pablo''': ''[sneezing]'' It's p-pollen!
:'''Uniqua''': Gardener Pablo, what's happening to me?!
:'''Pablo''': Hmm... Maybe, when you pricked your finger on that flower, it gave you special powers: Flower power!
:'''Uniqua''': Flower power?
:'''Pablo''': Yes, of course! You're like a big, walking, talking flower now, and I know all about taking care of flowers.

== Cast ==
* Kristi Baker (speaking) - Uniqua
* Jake Goldberg (speaking) - Pablo
* Christopher DeFaria (speaking) - Tyrone
* Melanie Kohn (singing) - Tasha
* [[w:Jonah Bobo|Jonah Bobo]] (speaking) - Austin

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://www.nick.com The Nickelodeon website.] 

{{DEFAULTSORT:Backyardigans, The}}

[[Category:2000s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2000s Canadian animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s Canadian animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2000s Nickelodeon original series]]
[[Category:2010s Nickelodeon original series]]
[[Category:Computer-animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated musical TV shows]]
[[Category:American preschool education TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian preschool education TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Television series on DVD]]
[[Category:Treehouse TV shows]]
[[Category:Nick Jr. shows]]
[[Category:Noggin shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:TV shows about deer and moose]]
[[Category:TV shows about kangaroos and wallabies]]
[[Category:TV shows about penguins]]</text>
      <sha1>1ykbad6ln6t1ott7wt4wlmzjl8p4qlg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>87530</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965147</id>
      <parentid>3959888</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:55:51Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-33927-91</username>
        <id>3339288</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965147</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19259" sha1="ng9k1azlfpre1pklv9obgkmapf5nfsw" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Japan Expo 2024 - Cosplay of Shaggy Rogers.jpg|thumb|You’re pushing your luck, Scoob!]]
'''''[[w:Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed|Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed]]''''' is a 2004 [[w:mystery|mystery]] adventure [[w:comedy|comedy]] horror film and a sequel to [[Scooby-Doo (film)|the 2002 film]]. The Mystery Incorporated gang must save Coolsville from an attack of past unmasked monsters brought to life by an evil masked figure who is trying to &quot;unmask&quot; them.
: ''Directed by [[w:Raja Gosnell|Raja Gosnell]]. Screenplay by [[James Gunn]].''
{{center|'''''Doo the fright thing.''''' ([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

==Scooby-Doo==
* ''♪ Thank you for letting me be myself again! Oh, yeah! ♪'' ''['''C.L. Magnus''': Hey! It's Scooby-Doo! That meddling mutt what helped throw us in jail!]'' Who, me? Nuh-uh. ''[chuckles nervously]''

==Dr. Jonathan Jacobo==
* Come alive! Come alive!
* So long, suckers! ''[falls]'' Help me, suckers!
* I would've gotten away with it, if it weren't for those meddling punks, and their dumb dog!

===Heather Jasper-Howe===
* Darn it! Thanks a lot! The scoop of the night is gone! Can't you do anything right? Ned, get your camera and follow me!

===The Evil Masked Figure===
* You can't do this to me! Who do you think you are?! ''['''Scooby''': Scooby-Dooby-Doo!]''

==Dialogue==
:'''Daphne''': Guys, come on! Remember what I told you?
:'''Shaggy''': Never pick your nose in public?
:'''Daphne''': ''[beat]'' No... but that's good, too.
:'''Scooby''': Image is everything.
:'''Daphne''': Yes! Image is everything. The whole city is watching, so try to keep a brave face. They're costumes.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The next day, the news has been cast on TV. Fred wore a white sweater beneath his blue collared shirt, orange ascot, blue jeans and brown shoes. Velma wore orange turtleneck sweater, red skirt, orange socks and red Mary Jane shoes. Daphne wore a purple dress with a wraparound top, green scarf, pink pantyhose and high-heeled lilac go-go boots and Shaggy wore a green V-neck shirt, brown bell-bottom pants and black converse]''
:'''Heather''': The higher the pedestal, the harder the fall. And Mystery Inc. fell far in the embarrassing debacle that tarnished the reputation of the once-great gang. It was an utter disaster. Two of the gang’s key members Norville &quot;Shaggy&quot; Rogers and Scoobert &quot;Scooby-Doo&quot; are seen here causing untold damage to Coolsville’s hottest new tourist attraction which took a full two years to complete. When asked for comment, Fred Jones, leader of Mystery Inc., said this:
:'''Fred''': ''[On TV]'' Little old Coolsville can solve its problems without us.
:'''Fred''': ''[gets annoyed]'' I didn’t say that! I mean… I did, but that’s out of context!
:'''Heather''': And I guess little old Coolsvile will have to. This is Heather Jasper-Howe, disillusioned from Coolsville.
:'''Velma''': ''[turns off the TV, feeling guilty while Scooby peeks from behind the kitchen and back down]'' It’s all my fault. I’m the one who told Shaggy and Scooby to get the ropes.
:'''Daphne''': No, Velma, it’s my fault. I should have checked that they were tied before I let go.
:'''Fred''': It’s my fault too. We all know how Shaggy and Scooby can be. But it’s all right. We just need to stay strong, in control, and work fast.
:'''Velma''': Come on, gang. Let’s get to the lab. We’ll figure a way out of this Jurassic jumble.
:''[The group headed to their research facility]''
:'''Scooby''': Shaggy?
:'''Shaggy''': We’re screwups.
:'''Scooby''': Yeah.
:'''Shaggy''': I guess, looking back, every time they made a plan, we did screw it up somehow. I just never noticed before.
:'''Scooby''': Me neither.
:'''Shaggy''': There’s gotta be some way we can prove that we actually belong in the gang. We’ve gotta do something totally unlike us. You know, Scoob… …we could act like real detectives!
:'''Scooby''': Really?
:'''Shaggy''': [stands up] Scooby-Doo, raise your right paw. No, your right paw. Your other paw. Repeat after me. From this day forward, we will no longer be our goofy selves. We will be awesome detectives. And we will act more like Fred and Velma and Daphne. We will be terrific and fantastic and spectacular… …and cease to be &quot;loser-iffic,&quot; &quot;lame-tastic&quot; and &quot;suck-tacular.&quot;
:'''Scooby''': Rah rah! Suck-tacular.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Boy on bike #1''': Hey!
:'''Scooby''': Huh?
:'''Boy on bike #1''': Nice job last night.
:'''Both boys on bikes''': Losers!
:'''Daphne''': ''[to the gang]'' Quick, we need to think of a comeback. 
:'''Boy on bike #2''': What dorks!
:'''Daphne''': ''[to the boys]'' Hey! Shut up!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fred''': Yo, Metalhead!
:'''Black Knight Ghost''': Yes?
:'''Fred''': Bring it! ''[The Black Knight Ghost repeatedly strikes out at the shield Fred is holding, dazing him]'' He brought it. ''[He faints]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The two men walk out of Faux Ghost]''
:'''Shaggy''': Okay, Scooby-Doo, the coast is clear.
:'''Scooby''': Here we go.
:''[They peak around the corner to see a club where the former villains hang out.]''
:'''Shaggy''': ''[points to Faux Ghost]'' That’s it, Scoob. The Faux Ghost. Man, I recognize a lot of these cats. Like, that’s C.L. Magnus. He used to dress up as Redbeard’s ghost. And that’s Aggie Wilkins, a.k.a. the Ozark Witch. These are all folks we unmasked. If they spot us, they’ll invite us to a weenie roast. One where we’re the weenies!
:'''Scooby''': Mmm, Hot dogs! ''[licks the box]''
:'''Shaggy''': There’s gotta be some way that we can use our awesome, fearless new skills… to get us in there without being recognized.
:''[In the Faux Ghost, the bar patrons are hanging out, arm wrestling, chatting, drinking beers and playing games that are billiards, ace cards and darts. Scooby and Shaggy came inside with costumes]''
:'''Shaggy''': Hey Hey Hey! Everyone part like the Red Rea. It’s me, Shizzy McCreepy, and my brother, S.D. McCrawley. We are in the house and ready to party.
:'''Aggie Wilkins''': ''[walks to Scooby]'' Hey, handsome.
:'''Scooby''': Hello, baby.
:''They walk through patrons who played billiards and darts and head to find Old Man Wickles''
:'''Man 1''': A Ghost Clown is a heck of a lot scarier than a Cotton Candy Glob!
:'''Man 2''': Hey, hey, hey!
:'''The men fight as Scooby and Shaggy run from the fight'''
:'''Wickles''': Watch out, Idiot!
:'''Patron''': Take him out.
:'''Shaggy''': ''[notices Wickles]'' Old man Wickles.
:'''Wickles''': ''[moves his hand at Shaggy]'' Leave me alone.
:'''Scooby''': ''[tastes the pickled egg, but spits it out and wipes his tongue]''
:'''Shaggy''': I just wanted to say thank you. Your portrayal of the Black Knight Ghost was inspirational to my brother and me. ''[whispers to Old Man Wickles]'' Have you done anything cool and creepy lately?
:'''Wickles''': ''[grabs Shaggy by the jacket]'' Listen, I’m not normally one for giving advice… but I feel sorry for you because of your brother’s hideous nose deformity. ''[points to exit of Faux Ghost]'' Get out of this game while you got a chance. All of us here ain’t nothing to admire. We needed people to believe we were different than we were. Maybe because we believed… that there was something wrong with who we were in the first place.
:'''Shaggy''': I guess you’re sort of grateful to Mystery Inc… for unmasking you.
:'''Wickles''': ''[enraged]'' Are you kidding? ''[bangs his fist on table]'' If I see those twerps, I’d tear their eyes out of their skulls. Make them eat the one eye while watching themselves eat it with the other eye! ''[insanely laughs]''
:'''Shaggy''': ''[nervously waves his hand]'' Bye. ''[to Scooby]'' Here’s a clue for you, Scoob. That dude’s wearing his freak hat 24/7.
:'''Scooby''': Yeah.
:'''Shaggy''': I gotta take a whiz. Don’t do anything to attract attention. ''[heads off to the bathroom]''
:'''Scooby''': Gotcha.
:'''Aggie Wilkins''': ''[walks up]'' Hey, doll. You wanna dance?
:'''Scooby''': Groovy. 
:''[They head for the dance floor]''
:'''Scooby''': Here we go. ''[gets on the stage and starts to dance while the Big Brovaz sing &quot;Thank You (Falletin Me Be Myself Again)&quot;
:'''Aggie''': Shake it, baby.
:'''Scooby''': Give me five!
:''[The villains line up beside Scooby]''
:'''Scooby''': Oh, yeah! Everybody! ''[leaps and gets caught by the crowd, cheering]'' Oh yeah! Hey, Shaggy!
:'''Shaggy''': ''[arrives and notices Scooby's wig and outfit coming off, whimpers, gesturing that his wig is coming off. But Scooby thought he was giving out dance moves. In one move, his wig and outfit came off and landed in a guy's soup]''
:'''Scooby''': ''[singing]'' Thank you for retting me be myself again
:''[The patrons recognized Scooby and got ticked]''
:'''C.L. Magnus''': Hey! It’s Scooby-Doo! ''[angrily points to Scooby]'' The meddling mutt what helped throw us in jail!
:'''Scooby''': Who, me? ''[shakes his head]'' Uh-uh.
:'''Shaggy''': No, wait, that’s not Scooby-Doo! That’s S.D. McCrawley. He’s just wearing a mask. ''[pulls on Scooby's face as if it was a mask and releases it]'' Ta-da! ''[his hat and outfit came off]''
:'''Timmy''': ''[angrily points to Shaggy]'' And that's Doo's beatnik best pal, Shaggy Rogers!
:'''Shaggy''': Where?
:'''Timmy''': There!
:'''Shaggyy''': Zoinks! Gangway!
:''[The patrons chase Scooby and Shaggy angrily]''
:'''Scooby''': Run, Shaggy. Wait for me!
:''[They both ran away and jump into the garbage chute]''
:'''Man''': And stay out!
:'''Shaggy''': Like, that wasn’t so bad, Scoob.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Patrick''': Stop wasting my time! Do you hear me?! Now, I want you to question all of your scum-bucket friends. They'll find out about what they know about those stolen costumes, or else you'll be known from here on in as the Soiled Underwear Ghost. I want answers! Now, go!
:'''Man''': Yes, sir!
:'''Patrick''': Now!
:'''Man''': Yes, sir!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Velma''': Mr. Wickles, we need to ask you a few questions about your ties to recent monster attacks.
:'''Wickles''': I don't know nothing about no monsters.
:'''Daphne''': Then how come there was randomonium on the floor of your mansion?
:'''Wickles''': There's-- there-- there's randomonium all over the place! Look it! ''[points at his glowing footprints]'' I come home with it in my shorts! 
:'''Fred''': Are you continuing the work of your old pal Jonathan Jacobo? 
:'''Wickles''': &quot;Old pal&quot;? Jacobo? We hated each other! In the prison cafeteria, he used to steal my tater tots! And he got the lead in ''[[w:My Fair Lady|My Fair Lady]]''.
:'''Velma''': Then why did we find the monster book in your library? 
:'''Wickles''': Wait a second... You're the runts that vandalized my home! 
:''[Fred, Daphne and Velma look awkward]''
:'''Wickles''': Which one of you stole my toilet brush?!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Shaggy''': ''[after accidentally being transformed into a woman]'' I've got a chick's body!
:'''Scooby''': ''[accidentally turns into the Tasmanian Devil]'' I'm the Tasmanian Devil!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Velma''': ''[hands Shaggy the control panel]'' Here, Shaggy, take this.
:'''Shaggy''': Why are you giving this to me? ''[hands it back to her]''
:'''Velma''': ''[hands it back to Shaggy]'' I'll distract those skeletal screwballs, you and Scooby get this to the Monster Hive.
:'''Shaggy''': Us?! ''[looks at Scooby]''
:'''Velma''': Yes, you're faster than me. Once there, just plug it into the base, ''[points to a button on the control panel]'' and push this button. I fixed it so it'll destroy all the monsters.
:'''Shaggy''': ''[slides down a wall]'' We'd love to. But... we can't.
:'''Scooby''': We’re screw-ups.
:'''Shaggy''': I mean, we tried being heroes like you guys, but we're ''not'', okay? We're just not!
:'''Scooby''': No.
:'''Velma''': ''[surprised]'' Like me? ''[kneels next to Shaggy]'' That's funny... I've always wanted to be like you guys. ''[Shaggy and Scooby look at each other in confusion]'' You guys are so free. You're never afraid to be who you really are. Whether you're fearful, or joyful, or... hungry. I think you've been heroes all along. You just haven't known it.
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Black Knight Ghost''': On your knees, knave.
:'''Fred''': Can't you see we're talking?
:'''Black Knight Ghost''': ''[repeated Fred line at the high school clubhouse]'' Talking is for wimps.
:'''Fred''': You can't fool me with that macho façade. You're just afraid to show your sensitive side.
:'''Black Knight Ghost''': ''[faking remorse]'' Oh, you've touched my inner child... AND HE'S REALLY MAD!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Evil Masked Figure''': You can't do this to me! Who do you think you are?!
:'''Scooby''': Scooby...''[zoom]'' Dooby... ''[zoom]] '''Doo!''''' 
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The monsters turn back into the stolen costumes]''
:'''Evil Masked Figure''': ''[gasps]'' My monsters!
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The crowd is cheering as the Mystery Incorporated gang arrive with the Evil Masked Figure]''
:'''Male Reporter''': Mystery Inc., do you know the identity of the Evil Masked Figure behind at all?
:'''Velma''': Well, if our hunch is correct, the Evil Masked Figure is…
:''[She and Daphne remove the Evil Masked Figure's mask]''
:'''Evil Masked Figure/Heather''': NO!
:''[Heather, who is exposed, shakes her blonde hair and everyone gasps]''
:'''Daphne''': Heather Jasper-Howe.
:'''Scooby''': Uh-huh. Huh?
:''[Wickles and Patrick arrive while the crowd gets confused]''
:'''Female Reporter #1''': But she was at the museum when the Masked Figure was on the roof.
:'''Daphne''': ''[to Heather]'' You almost had me there, didn't you? Lucky for her, she had an assistant helping her along with her evil plans. ''[Instead of looking at Patrick, who has braced himself for exposure, Daphne points at someone else]'' Ned.
:'''Scooby''': Huh?
:''[Two officers stop Ned from running. In a flashback, he gets dressed in Heather's costume last night]''
:'''Daphne''': When I ''realized'' she was the Evil Masked Figure, ''he'' quickly changed into ''her'' costume.
:''[In the present]''
:'''Female Reporter #2''': But why did she do it?!
:'''Velma''': Because Heather Jasper-Howe is actually… ''(Pause for effect.)''
:''[Heather's head becomes a mask which Velma removes]''
:'''Scooby''': Huh?
:''[everyone gasps even louder]''
:'''Velma''': …Dr. Jonathan Jacobo. ''[a female police officer, Shaggy, Daphne, and Wickles get shocked]'' The original Pterodactyl Ghost.
:'''Gretchen Saunders Female Reporter #3''': But how do you know this?
:'''Velma''': A photo. Taken of Jacobo in front of the Coolsonian. Jacobo supposedly died a year before construction even began.
:'''Shaggy''': So, Jacobo survived that fall off the prison wall.
:'''Scooby''': Yeah.
:'''Fred''': He also adapted the false Heather Jasper-Howe persona to turn the press against us.
:'''Daphne''': Then he framed poor hideous Old Man Wickles by putting that book and the Black Knight Ghost in his mansion.
:'''Wickles''': As if you getting the lead in ''[[w:My Fair Lady|My Fair Lady]]'' wasn't enough!
:'''Jacobo''': I was an excellent Eliza, and you were to acty!
:'''Wickles''': And stealing my tater tots!
:'''Jacobo''': You kept saying you felt puffy!
:'''Fred''': And the real identity of Ned is…
:''[Fred tugs on Ned's hair; a tearing sound is heard. Ned is clearly human.]''
:'''Ned''': Ow!
:'''Fred''': Ned!
:'''Scooby''': Huh?
:''[The officers escort Ned away with Jacobo]''
:'''Jacobo''': I would've gotten away with it, if it weren't for those meddling punks and their dumb dog!
:''[The crowd cheers as Scooby laughs]''
:'''Ned''': You were a dude this whole time?
:'''Jacobo''': Of course, ''dummkopf''.
:'''Ned''': ''[upset]'' But we cuddled.

==Taglines==
* Monsters are Unleashed 
* They came. They saw. They ran. 
* Do the fright thing. 
* Look Doo's back in theaters 
* Got Monsters?

== Cast ==
* [[w:Neil Fanning|Neil Fanning]] — Voice of [[w:Scooby-Doo (character)|Scooby-Doo]]
** [[w:J. P. Manoux|Jean-Paul Manoux]] — Voice of Scooby Brainiac
* [[w:Freddie Prinze Jr.|Freddie Prinze Jr.]] — [[w:Fred Jones (Scooby-Doo)|Fred Jones]]
* [[Sarah Michelle Gellar]] — [[w:Daphne Blake|Daphne Blake]]
* [[w:Matthew Lillard|Matthew Lillard]] — [[w:Shaggy Rogers|Shaggy Rogers]]
* [[w:Linda Cardellini|Linda Cardellini]] — [[w:Velma Dinkley|Velma Dinkley]]
* [[w:Seth Green|Seth Green]] — Patrick Wisely
* [[w:Peter Boyle|Peter Boyle]] — Jeremiah &quot;Old Man&quot; Wickles
* [[w:Tim Blake Nelson|Tim Blake Nelson]] — Dr. Jonathan Jacobo
** [[Alicia Silverstone]] — Heather Jasper-Howe
*** [[w:Scott McNeil|Scott McNeil]] &lt;small&gt;(body and voice)&lt;/small&gt; — The Evil Masked Figure
* Zahf Paroo — Ned the Cameraman
* [[w:Karin Konoval|Karin Konoval]] — Aggie Wilkins
* Stephen E. Miller — C.L. Magnus
* Terrence Stone &lt;small&gt;(speaking)&lt;/small&gt;&lt;br&gt;[[Dee Bradley Baker]] &lt;small&gt;(vocal effects)&lt;/small&gt; — Voice of the 10,000 Volt Ghost
* [[w:Kevin Durand|Kevin Durand]] &lt;small&gt;(body)&lt;/small&gt;&lt;br&gt;[[w:Bob Papenbrook|Bob Papenbrook]] &lt;small&gt;(voice)&lt;/small&gt; — The Black Knight Ghost
* [[Dee Bradley Baker]] — Vocal Effects of the Pterodactyl Ghost and Red-Eyed Skeleton
* [[C. Ernst Harth|Cary Ernst Harth]] — The Miner 49er
* Chris Sumpton &lt;small&gt;(body)&lt;/small&gt;&lt;br&gt;[[Dee Bradley Baker]] &lt;small&gt;(vocal effects)&lt;/small&gt; — The Zombie
* [[w:Michael Sorich|Michael Sorich]] — Voices of the Tar Monster and Cotton Candy Glob
* [[w:Wally Wingert|Wally Wingert]] — Vocal Effects of the Green-Eyed Skeleton
* [[w:Tasmanian Devil (Looney Tunes)|Tasmanian Devil — Himself]]

== See Also ==
* ''[[Scooby-Doo (film)|Scooby-Doo]]'', a 2002 film also directed by Raja Gosnell
* ''[[Scoob!]]'', a 2020 animated reboot film directed by Tony Cervone
* ''[[Hey There, It's Yogi Bear!]]'', a 1964 animated film also directed by William Hanna and Jospeh Barbera
* ''[[Yogi Bear (film)|Yogi Bear]]'', a 2010 film also directed by Eric Brevig
* ''[[The Flintstones (film)|The Flintstones]]'', a 1994 film also directed by Brian Levant
* ''[[The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas]]'', a 2000 prequel film also directed by Brian Levant
* ''[[Jetsons: The Movie]]'', a 1990 animated film also directed by William Hanna and Jospeh Barbera
* ''[[Top Cat: The Movie]]'', a 2011 animated film directed by Alberto Mar

== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{imdb title|id=0331632|title=Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed}}

{{Scooby-Doo}}


[[Category:2004 films]]
[[Category:2004 American films]]
[[Category:Adventure films]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Fantasy films]]
[[Category:Scooby-Doo films]]
[[Category:Warner Bros. Discovery]]
[[Category:Live-action films based on animated series]]
[[Category:Mystery films]]
[[Category:Films set in museums]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:American sequel films]]
[[Category:Screenplays by James Gunn]]
[[Category:Films directed by Raja Gosnell]]
[[Category:Films set in Ohio]]
[[Category:Animated films about dogs]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:American films with live action and animation]]
[[Category:Films about revenge]]
[[Category:Films about dogs]]
[[Category:Buddy films]]
[[Category:Films about friendship]]
[[Category:Animated films about friendship]]
[[Category:2000s English-language films]]
[[Category:Cult films]]
[[Category:Cross-dressing in films]]</text>
      <sha1>ng9k1azlfpre1pklv9obgkmapf5nfsw</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>A Goofy Movie</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>87965</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965240</id>
      <parentid>3960145</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:35:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965240</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="74496" sha1="1ku2f5izpxqut5ks0y93gk8r420xbtr" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Stamp of Albania - 2001 - Colnect 372090 - Goofy 1932 Animal Cartoon Character.jpeg|thumb|Goodbye, house! Goodbye, mailbox! Goodbye, pile of broken wood!]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:A Goofy Movie|A Goofy Movie]]''''' is a [[w:1995 in film|1995]] animated film made by [[w:The Walt Disney Company|The Walt Disney Company]]; it features the characters Goofy and Max from the television series ''[[w:Goof Troop|Goof Troop]]'' as they go on a road trip and work out their difficult father-son relationship.
:''Directed by [[w:Kevin Lima|Kevin Lima]]. Written by [[w:Jymn Magon|Jymn Magon]], [[w:Brian Pimental|Brian Pimental]] and Chris Matheson.''
{{center|'''It's Goofy and Max...in their first full-length animated feature!'''}}

== Goofy ==
* Goodbye, house! Goodbye, mailbox! ''[backs up and damages his fence]'' Goodbye, pile of broken wood!
* Behold the legendary Bigfoot!
* Day one. Well, here we are, out on  the open road, retracing the steps of my boy hood. And here's Maxie! A-hyuck! Say hi, Max!

== Max ==
* I can't believe I did that! She finally says &quot;hi&quot; to me, and what do I do?! I choke! &quot;A-hyuck!&quot; Like a big spaz!
* ''['''Goofy''': Look, Max!]'' Uh, Dad, it's '''''BIGFOOT!''''' ''['''Goofy''': Could you back up a bit, Mr. Foot? You're out of focus.]''

== Others ==
* '''Bobby''': ''[shows Max his &quot;cheesy&quot; model of the Leaning Tower of Pisa]'' Max, look! It's the Leaning Tower of Cheeza!
* '''Pete''': What's the idea?! ''[sees Max and Goofy being chased by Bigfoot alarmed]'' '''''BIGFOOT!'''''

== Dialogue ==
:''[The 1990 Walt Disney Pictures logo appears. When the logo disappears, it fades to open on a sky blue screen shows &quot;WALT DISNEY PICTURES presents&quot; which changes to &quot;A MOVIE&quot;. Goofy falls down while shrieking a familiar holler and a loud crash as a “GOOFY&quot; sign appears on screen, to reveal a title logo: &quot;A GOOFY MOVIE&quot;, the camera pans down to show a wind blown wheat field with a beautiful blue sky and cotton puff clouds]''
:'''Roxanne''': Max... Max... Max...
:'''Max''': ''[appears close up and gasps at the sound of his name. He looks around for the source, finally squinting into the audience. The camera reverses viewpoint to show a tall pedestal with a female figure on top. Max begins to run through the wheat toward it. Finally reaching the clearing in the wheat, Max can now see who is on the pedestal clearly, a beautiful girl, in Max's age]'' Roxanne? ''[A girl, named Roxanne, is holding a white dandelion and she gently blows the seeds toward Max. Max is mesmerized by the seeds. Roxanne leaps from atop the pedestal and gracefully glides down toward Max. Max attempts to catch her, but they end up falling down on the ground. They giggle for a while, then look at each other. Max sighs. Roxanne puckers her lips for a kiss. Suddenly the sky changes to overcast gray and the wheat changes to thorns. Roxanne gasps and draw away, shocked. The camera switches to Max, who now has incredibly large buck teeth]'' What's wrong? ''[notices his teeth. Then his ears and his hand grow. Roxanne backs off, terrified. Max's feet grow so big they burst out of his shoes and he continues to grow and change until he looks exactly like his father, Goofy. Roxanne screams. Max feels a Goofy laugh force its way out of his throat like the howl of a werewolf]''
:''[Lightning flashes as the scene cuts at Max's bedroom. Max awakes from sleep, screams and gasps repeatedly, checks his head and his teeth and sighs when he realizes it was just a scary dream. The Mickey Mouse-themed phone rings]''
:'''Max''': ''[picks up the receiver and answers it]'' Hello? Hello?
:'''PJ''': ''[on phone]'' Max? Where the heck are you, man?
:'''Max''': PJ?
:'''PJ''': ''[on phone]'' You should have been here an hour ago!
:'''Max''': What? What are you... Hold on. ''[hits his alarm clock which was showing 4:02. The numbers spin then show 7:50]'' Oh, no! ''[leaps out of bed and begins to dress while still on the phone and puts on his pants]''
:'''PJ''': ''[on phone]'' Look, maybe we should just call the whole thing off!
:'''Max''': No way, man! It's now or never!
:'''PJ''': ''[on phone]'' Well, you better get a move on! I'll meet you at my locker!
:''[Max hangs up the phone]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[open the door to Max's room, dressed in his green hat, orange top, purple vest, blue pants and brown shoes and has a vacuum cleaner with him]'' Morning, son!
:'''Max''': ''[embarrassed]'' DAD!!! ''[yanks up his pants out of embarrassment]''
:'''Goofy''': Oops! I forgot. ''[shuts door, knocks, then opens it again]'' Morning, son! I came to see if you had any dirty clothes...
:'''Max''': ''[grabs his shirt and puts it on]'' Well, there they are! Help yourself!
:'''Goofy''': ''[notices that then entire floor is covered with dirty clothes]'' Max! I thought we talked about this.
:'''Max''': ''[puts on his shoes]'' Yeah, look, I'm sorry, Dad. I'll take care of it later!
:'''Goofy''': What's the big rush?
:'''Max''': ''[grabs his baseball hat, shades and his backpack]'' I'm running late.
:'''Goofy''': ''[begins to vacuum up the dirty clothes]'' Well, I could drive you on my way to work.
:'''Max''': Uh, no thanks. I need the exercise.
:'''Goofy''': Aw, come on, Max! ''[accidentally allows the vacuum nozzle to get too close to a cardboard cut out of a singing rock star and The head of it gets sucked in]''
:'''Max''': DAD! ''[grabs the cut out, while Goofy holds the vacuum, turns off the vacuum and extracts the cut out, which has been curled in a couple of places; enraged]'' Aw, Dad! You ruined it!
:'''Goofy''': ''[apologizes to Max]'' Sorry about that. Who was he, anyway?
:'''Max''': It's only Powerline, Dad. The biggest rock star on the planet.
:'''Goofy''': Oh, not bigger than Xavier Cugat, The Mambo King! Everybody mambo! Mambo, mambo, mambo!
:'''Max''': Dad! Aw, come on, there's no time for this! What if the neighbors see us, huh? ''[extracts himself from Goofy and dashes out the door]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The camera switches to the front of the house. Max has exited out the front door]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[comes around from the back]'' Maxie! Wait up! You forgot your lunch! Have a good day! ''[kisses Max]''
:''[A few skateboarders passing by see it and start laughing]''
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' They've been laughing since I can remember, but they're not gonna laugh anymore! No more &quot;Maxie the geek&quot;! No more &quot;Goof of the week&quot; like before!
:'''Girl tearing up test''': ''[singing]'' No more algebra tests 'til September!
:'''Boy''': ''[singing]'' No more looking at losers like him!
:'''Bully with crib notes on arm''': ''[singing]'' No more having to cheat!
:'''Another Bully''': ''[singing]'' No more mystery meat!
:'''Boy''': ''[singing]'' No more gym!
:'''Another Boy''': ''[singing]'' No more gym!
:'''Yet Another Boy''': ''[singing]'' No more gym!
:'''Yet Another Another Boy''': ''[shouting]'' No more gym!
:'''Girl with credit cards''': ''[singing]'' Gonna move to the mall!
:'''Beach Boy''': ''[singing]'' Gonna live in the pool!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' Gonna talk to Roxanne and not feel like a fool!
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' 'Cause after today I'm gonna be cruising!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' After today she'll be mine!
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' After today my brains'll be snoozing!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' If I don't faint, I'll be fine!
:'''Twin Girls''': ''[singing]'' I've got forty more minutes of Home Economics!
:'''Twin Boys''': ''[singing]'' Then down with the textbooks...
:'''Nerdy Boys''': ''[singing]'' And up with the comics!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' Just think of all of the time I've been losing, finding the right thing to say!
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' But things'll be going my way, after today!
:'''Max''': ''[waves, but Roxanne does not see him, singing]'' She looked right through me! And who could blame her? I need a new me, plus some positive proof that I'm not just a goof! And...
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' After today I'm gonna be cruising!
:'''Two Girls in black''': ''[singing]'' No more pep rallies to cut!
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' After today my brains'll be snoozing!
:'''Bus Driver''': ''[singing]'' I'm gonna sit on my butt!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' I've got less than an hour and when this is ended, I'll either be famous... ''[slides down the banister and accidentally bumps into Principal Mazur]''
:'''Principal Mazur''': ''[shakes his fist, singing]'' Or you'll be suspended!
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' Just think of all of the time I've been losing, waiting until I could say: Gonna be on my own, kiss the parents good-bye! Gonna party from now 'til the end of July! Things'll be going my way after today!
:''[school bell rings]''
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' I wish that this was the day after today! ''[starts to step down, but trips and tumbles down, falling flat on his face at the bottom, losing his hat and shades]''
:''[Students laugh at him then walk away]''
:'''Roxanne''': ''[comes over and helps him up]'' Are you all right?
:'''Max''': ''[puts on his hat and shades]'' Yeah, yeah, I'm OK, I just ah, duh,... ''[starts laughing, the emits a Goofy &quot;Uhyuck!&quot;, covers his mouth and dashes away, accidentally tripping over some garbage cans. He looks back at Roxanne for a moment, then runs away with an cry of anguish]''
:''[Roxanne looks down at the ground for a moment]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The school bell rings again and We cut to inside the high school]''
:'''Max''': I can't believe I did that! She finally says &quot;hi&quot; to me and what do I do? I choke! Uhyuck! Like a big spaz!
:'''PJ''': Where have you been, buddy?
:'''Max''': Hi, Peej. Did you get the camera?
:'''PJ''': Look, Max, if my Dad catches me with this he'll kill me! Are you sure we gotta do this?
:'''Max''': It's my only chance, PJ. To Roxanne I'm just a nobody! But after today...
:''[Max and PJ are suddenly flooded with light]''
:'''Max''': ''[squints into it]'' Bobby!
:''[Bobby is drinking at the fountain with a straw. Max and PJ examine the video equipment on a dolly]''
:'''Max''': Wow! All this is for us?
:'''Bobby''': Mmmmm. Slurpage!
:'''Max''': Oh, this is going to be so great, man!
:'''Bobby''': ''[wraps around Max]'' Dude, need fundage, bro.
:'''Max''': ''[reaches into his backpack, and brings out a bag, handing it to Bobby]'' Oh, your fee! Yeah, yeah! Right here.
:'''Bobby''': ''[reaches into the bag and pull out an aerosol can]'' Cheddar! ''[wolf howl]'' Cheddar Whizzie! ''[sprays an enormous amount of the cheese into his mouth, smacks his lips and coughs, spraying Max and PJ with cheese]'' Mmm. It's pretty scrumptious! Let's do it, ladies!
:''[The scene cuts to school auditorium. Entire school body is there, making noise and throwing paper. Stacey is at the podium in the middle of the stage]''
:'''Stacey''': As student body president, I just want to say, like, &quot;yea&quot; to all of us for a really neat year.
:'''Trekkie''': Yo, Stacey! Talk to me! Talk to me! Talk to me, baby!
:'''Stacey''': And also that I hope you can all attend my totally amazing end-of-school party next Saturday to watch the Powerline concert live on Pay-per-view.
:''[Students cheer this announcement]''
:'''Stacey''': Thank you. Thank you very much. And now, without further ado, Principal Mazur.
:''[The microphone squeals as Principal Mazur begins to speak]''
:'''Principal Mazur''': Thank you, Stacey! And good morning, boys and girls! You know, every year, on the last day of school, I have several youngsters approach me and say, &quot;Principal Mazur, what can we do to not waste our summer vacation? We don't want to waste our free time sleeping or visiting friends...&quot;
:'''Chad''': Say, uh, Roxanne. About Stacey's party...
:''[The scene cuts to Max, who can see the Boy talking to Roxanne through a part in the curtain]''
:'''Max''': ''[closes the curtain, and zips up his Powerline costume]'' How are you, uh, how are you doing down there, Bobby?
:'''Bobby''': Don't give me that attitude, you guys. I'm doing it all for you.
:'''PJ''': This is nuts! I don't know why I let you guys talk me into this. If my dad finds out, he's gonna nuke my entire existence! ''[trips on the wires backstage and partially goes under the curtain]''
:'''Max''': Oh, I hope this works!
:'''Principal Mazur''': ...how about Science Slumber Parties! ''[The spotlight goes out]'' What the... ''[Max puts on his shades and gives a thumbs up. It is echoed by Bobby and PJ. A button is pressed. Rock music begins. A large screen begins to rise behind Principal Mazur. Max appears on the screen. Bobby pulls a switch]'' What? ''[notices the screen rising]'' Hey! I'm not going to just...
:''[A trap door opens up under the podium and it and Principal Mazur disappears down it. Bobby laughs]''
:'''Max (as Tevin Campbell)''': ''[lip synching]'' Some people settle for the typical thing: living all their lives waiting in the wings. It ain't a question of if, just a matter of time, before I move to the front of the line. And once you watching every move that I make, you gotta believe that I got what it takes. To stand out above the crowd even if I gotta shout out loud. 'Til mine is the only face you'll see. Gonna stand out 'til you notice me.
:''[The students scream their approval. Max is amazed to see the reception his act is getting. He especially notices the rapt gaze of Roxanne in the front row. Bobby laughs and tickles PJ over the success of the plan. Both give Max a thumbs up]''
:'''Bobby''': ''[turns on a CO2 fire extinguisher]'' A little smokage! Arooo-oo-ooo!
:'''Max (as Tevin Campbell)''': ''[lip synching]'' If I make you stop and take a look at me instead of just walking by, there's nothing that I wouldn't do if it was getting you to notice I'm alive. All I need is half a chance, a second thought, a second glance will prove I got whatever it takes. It's a piece of cake.
:''[Bobby hands PJ a rope with a hook on it. PJ sneaks under cover of the CO2 fog and hooks Max's belt from behind]''
:'''Max (as Tevin Campbell)''': ''[lips synching]'' To stand out above the crowd. Even if I gotta shout out loud. ''[grabs a basketball and slam dunks it. As he swings back, he reaches out for Roxanne's outstretched hand]''{{'}}Til mine is the only face you'll see. Gonna...
:'''Girl''': Wow! Who is that guy?
:''[Max's hand almost grabs Roxanne's, but suddenly the music winds down and dies. The cable is pulled back sending Max tumbling, finally ending up by Principal Mazur]''
:'''Boy''': Hey, it's the Goof Boy!
:'''Bobby''': We're busted!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Goofy''': ''[A photo studio a rubber duck and making baby sounds]'' A-hyuck! Come on, smile! Smiley wiley! Aw, come on, Kimmie! Gimme a big... ''[A baby girl named Kimmie. He squeezes a rubber ducky, the squeaker on the rubber ducky pops out which caused Goofy to choke and accidentally swallows it, squeaks when he tried to speak. Kimmie likes it and breaks into a big smile. Goofy takes advantage of this to begin taking pictures and playing peekaboo with the child]''
:'''Pete''': ''[furiously come up behind Goofy, angrily slaps him on the back and knocks the squeaker out of Goofy's throat]'' Stop goofing around! We got work to do!
:'''Goofy''': OK, Kimmie, back to Mommy, now. A-hyuck! You're such a cute little girlie. Oh, come back and see me!
:'''Kimmie's mother''': Oh, you have such a way with children!
:'''Pete''': ''[angrily mocks Kimmie's mother]'' You have such a way with children! Pleh!
:'''Goofy''': ''[approaches a little girl and her mother; the little girl is wearing a blue dress and hairbow and black Mary Janes. A waiting for a picture]'' OK, now! Who's next over he...
:'''Pete''': ''[grabs Goofy out of his way]'' Step aside, Goof. Let a pro show ya how it's done. OK! Who's next over here? Heh, heh! Oh, hello precious... ''[A little girl kicks Pete in the knee]'' D'oh! Ow! You lucky woman! Now-now, now you come on here, honey! It's picture time! She's so cute!
:'''Little girl''': ''[giggles and hides]'' Peekaboo! Peekaboo!
:'''Goofy''': Gosh, Pete. You sure are good with kids.
:'''Pete''': Oh, yeah. Well, they love me. Why, PJ, he's been begging me to take him on vacation this summer.
:'''Goofy''': Really? Where you going?
:'''Pete''': Camping! Nothing like the great outdoors to strengthen the bond between a father and a son.  ''[puts the sitting stamp on the little girl's butt]''
:'''Goofy''': Oh, Max would never go for anything like that. ''[gives a stuffed deer to the little girl]''
:'''Pete''': I don't know, Goof. Something's wrong when a kid won't spend time with his parents. For all you know, he's running around with some gang and stealing stuff and causing riots and... ''[takes little girl's toy deer away from her]''
:'''Little girl''': Wah! Give me, give me, give me.
:'''Goofy''': Oh, Max is a good kid. He'd never get mixed up in something like that.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[With a loud boom, the scene cuts to the main office of the high school, where Max and Bobby and sitting, waiting their turn to speak with the Principal. Miss Maples, a secretary, is typing and humming the funeral march]''
:'''Max''': ''[depressed]'' I'm a failure--complete loser! My one chance to impress Roxanne and I blew it.
:'''Bobby''': ''[reveals something he has been working on for a while]'' Uh, huh! Max! Look! It's the leaning tower of cheeza! ''[stuffs the cheese in his mouth]''
:'''PJ''': ''[comes out of the Principal’s office with a vacant look on his face]'' Oh, man! My dad is gonna smash me like a bug!
:'''Bobby''': Hey, PJ! Detention! ''[laughs jokingly]''
:'''Principal Mazur''': Robert Zimmeruski.
:'''Bobby''': ''[nervously calls Principal Mazur]'' OK, I'm coming! Max, here. ''[hands Max can of cheese]'' Guard this with your life, dude. ''[wheels the dolly of video equipment into Principal Mazur's office and gives Max a double thumbs up]'' Hey, Principal Mazur! What's up, bro!
:''[The door to Principal Mazur's office shuts. Max puts his head in his hands. Roxanne and Stacey come by the office]''
:'''Stacey''': ''[fading]'' ...with all those kids in my house the place will be like a sauna so I'm all freaked out, but then I thought, &quot;Like, use it!&quot; So my theme's gonna be: &quot;Powerline Goes Rain Forest&quot;! Too much? Roxanne, are you listening?
:''[Roxanne looks at Max]''
:'''Stacey''': Ahhh!
:'''Roxanne''': No, I don't wanna...
:'''Stacey''': ''[whispers]'' Talk to him! ''[Roxanne clears her throat a couple of times]'' Tap him!
:''[Roxanne taps Max who immediately sits up, startled. Roxanne's books and papers go flying]''
:'''Max''': ''[looks at Roxanne and smiles, gets up out of the chair then starts to help Roxanne pick up the papers and books]'' Gosh, I'm sorry.
:'''Roxanne''': It's OK. Really.  ''[Max and Roxanne reach for the same paper at the same time and Max's hand touches hers. They stay that way for a moment, then Max withdraws his hand, a bit embarrassed]'' Um, I liked your dance.
:'''Max''': Yeah. Yeah? Uh, yeah! It's from Powerline's new video!
:'''Roxanne''': I know! He's totally a genius!
:'''Max''': Uh, yeah! He, he's doing a concert next week in Los Angeles!
:'''Roxanne''': Oh, yeah! Stacey is showing it at her party.
:'''Max''': Yeah!
:'''Roxanne''': Yeah!
:'''Max''': ''[fidgets and fumbles for a while]'' Um, uh, Roxanne, I was, uh, sorta kinda thinking that maybe I'd ask you to go with me that is to the party. Of course if you don't want to I'd completely understand!
:'''Roxanne''': Well, I was, sorta kinda thinking that ... I'd love to!
:'''Max''': Yeah?
:'''Roxanne''': Yeah!
:'''Max''': Good!
:'''Roxanne''': Great!
:'''Max''': Terrific!
:'''Roxanne''': Wonderful!
:'''Max''': All right!
:'''Roxanne''': OK!
:'''Stacey''': ''[grabs Roxanne's arm and beings to drag her away]'' Come on, Roxanne. We don't wanna belabor the moment now, do we?
:'''Roxanne''': Well, I'd better be going.
:'''Max''': I'll call you later!
:'''Roxanne''': OK! Bye! ''[backs into the door. Giggles nervously, then with a final &quot;Bye.&quot; leaves the office]''
:'''Stacey''': See? That wasn't so bad! I told you men are easy to deal with!
:'''Max''': Yes! She said yes! Woo hoo hoo hoo! Everybody mambo! ''[grabs Miss Maples and begins to mambo with her]''
:'''Miss Maples''': It's not my break yet!
:'''Bobby''': Yeah! Dance with her! Groove with her!
:'''Principal Mazur''': ''[enraged]'' Miss Maples! Get that boy's father on the phone at once!
:'''Miss Maples''': ''[sing-songish]'' Yes sir! Right away, sir!
:''[The scene cuts to Goofy answering the phone at the Discount Store]''
:'''Goofy''': Hello.
:'''Principal Mazur''': Uh, yes, Mr. Goof. This is Principal Mazur. I'm calling in regard to your son, Maximillian.
:'''Goofy''': Max? Oh my gosh! Is he hurt?
:'''Principal Mazur''': No, Mr. Goof. ''[enraged]'' He's in trouble!
:'''Goofy''': Trouble? What kinda trouble?
:'''Principal Mazur''': Dressed like a gang member. Your son caused the entire student body to break into a riotous frenzy!
:'''Goofy''': Gang member? Riot? It couldn't be my...
:'''Principal Mazur''': ''[ticked off]'' If I were you, Mr. Goof, I'd seriously re-evaluate the way you're raising your child, before he ends up IN THE ELECTRIC CHAIR! ''[angrily hangs up the phone]''
:'''Goofy''': The electric chair? ''[lets the phone drop]'' What am I gonna do? ''[bathed in a beam of blue light]''
:'''PA''': Blue light special on aisle 3. Blue light special on aisle 3.
:'''Goofy''': ''[bobs the head of one of the figures, which bounces around a while]'' Lake Destiny.
:''[The scene cuts to Pete with the camera, with the little girl's picture taking all set]''
:'''Pete''': OK, kiddo, now smile!
:'''Goofy''': ''[interrupts Pete's picture taking]'' Lake Destiny, Idaho!
:'''Pete''': Lake Destiny, Idaho?
:'''Goofy''': You were right, Pete. Nothing like the great outdoors to strengthen the bond between father and son! You said so yourself!
:'''Pete''': Well, yeah, but, ah...
:'''Goofy''': ''[takes off his hat and dances away, then puts it back on]'' I'm going fishing! I'm going fishing with my boy!
:'''Pete''': Yah! OK, precious, give me a big smi... ''[sees the little girl's underwear still attached to the sitting stamp; he realizes that the little girl has gotten out of the sitting spot to avoid having her picture taken]''
:'''Little girl''': ''[giggles as she runs after Goofy; the little girl's butt is now nude]'' Fishy! Fishy!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The scene cuts to front of high school. The final bell rings and students come dashing out. Max walks out with a smile on his face and a vacant look]''
:'''Boy''': Cool concert, lad!
:'''Max''': What?
:'''Another Boy''': You wailed, bud!
:'''Girl''': Hey, Max. Wicked dance!
:'''Max''': Thanks!
:'''Stacey''': ''[comes by and pushes the girl away]'' Forget it, girl. He's Roxanne's.
:'''PJ''': Way to go, man! I just heard about you and Roxanne! You stud!
:'''Max''': Oh, PJ!
:'''PJ''': See? See? I told you our plan would work! ''[chanting]'' Max! Max!
:'''Max''': PJ, knock it off! Shhh!
:'''Bobby''': Maximum! Maximum!
:'''Cheerleaders''': Max! Max! Max!
:''[More and more students join in the chant until the entire student body is chanting &quot;Max! Max!&quot; Max is pleasantly shocked. He dances his way home, grabs a skateboard with his arm pads and legs helmet]''
:'''Max (as Tevin Campbell)''': ''[lip synching]'' All I need is half a chance, a second thought, a second glance will prove I got whatever it takes. It's a piece of cake. To stand out above the crowd. Even if I gotta shout out loud. 'Til mine is the only face you'll see. Gonna stand out. Stand out, hey. Stand out. (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) Stand Out. 'Til mine is the only face you'll see. Gonna stand out so you notice me. ''[kicks the gate of his home open and walks through]'' Going somewhere, Pop?
:'''Goofy''': Sure are, Pal-a-roony!
:'''Max''': Cool. Well, have a good time, Dad. If you're gonna be gone more than a month, drop me a line.
:'''Goofy''': ''[puts the stuff in his car]'' But Max, this isn't just my vacation. It's a vacation with me and my best buddy!
:'''Max''': Oh, Donald Duck?
:'''Goofy''': No, silly. With you! ''[Max gets shocked, drops his skateboard, and faints]'' Are you OK, Maxie?
:'''Max''': Wha..What did you say? ''[gets up]''
:'''Goofy''': I'm going on vacation with you, Maxie. ''[hugs Max]''
:'''Max''': ''[annoyed]'' I think I'm gonna be sick.
:'''Goofy''': Hey! Got a present for ya!
:'''Max''': ''[as Goofy puts a life vest on him]'' Dad! Stop! I can't do it!
:'''Goofy''': ''[pulls a cord and the vest inflates]'' You look just like I did at your age!
:'''Max''': ''[gets worried]'' Please don't say that, Dad.
:'''Goofy''': Wait! I saved the best for last! ''[laughs]'' It's been handed down from Goof to Goof to Goof! And now, it's yours, son.
:'''Max''': A stick?
:'''Goofy''': ''[reveals a fishing pole]'' No, silly. A fishing pole!
:'''Max''': ''[shocked and annoyed]'' Fishing? We're going fishing?
:'''Goofy''': Yup, just like my dad and me did! Two best buddies fishing on Lake Destiny, away from it all!
:'''Max''': ''[stubbornly tells Goofy off]'' I don't wanna be away from it all, Dad! I like it all!
:'''Goofy''': ''[shows Max a map]'' Hey, look, Maxie! We're using the same map me and my dad used. We'll take the same route and make the same stops and see the same sights...
:'''Max''': ''[shocked]'' But that trip would take weeks, Dad!
:'''Goofy''': Exactly! Getting there's half the fun!
:'''Max''': ''[angrily pushes the map away]'' Put the map away, Dad. It's not gonna happen, I'm telling you, it's not...
:'''Goofy''': ''[puts the map back on the car]'' Careful, son! You'll wrinkle my past and our future! What the map says, Max, we will follow!
:'''Max''': That's very mystical and everything, Dad, but, uh... seriously, there's this party I have to go to...
:'''Goofy''': Oh, there'll be plenty of time for parties when you're older, Maxie. Why, when I was your age, I'd never even been invited to a party and look at me now! ''[holds his hat]''
:'''Max''': Great, Dad.
:'''Goofy''': ''[opens car door]'' Hop in, Maxie!
:'''Max''': ''[angrily closes the car door]'' No.
:'''Goofy''': ''[thinks for a second, then starts to feel very sad]'' All right, then. Guess I'll just have to go all alone. That's all. Just sit in the boat all alone and talk to myself all alone.
:'''Max''': I guess so.
:'''Goofy''': ''[frustratedly opens the car door]'' Aw, come on, hop in!
:'''Max''': ''[angrily shuts it]'' No, Dad.
:'''Goofy''': ''[frustratedly opens it]'' Just hop right in there!
:'''Max''': ''[angrily shuts it]'' NO!
:'''Goofy''': ''[frustrated]'' Come on, Maxie! Go for it! ''[calmly]'' We're ready for take off! ''[goes around to his door and gets in]'' Set for adventure, Maxie?
:'''Max''': ''[frustrated]'' Why are you doing this to me, Dad?
:'''Goofy''': 'Cause, I don't want ya to end up in the electric chair!
:'''Max''': The electric chair? What are you...
:'''Goofy''': I'm not giving up on ya, son. Together, we're gonna work this out.
:'''Max''': Work this out? But, Dad...
:'''Goofy''': ''[holds his hand to stop Max from speaking]'' No buts about it, Maxie Boy! Your ol' pop knows best. ''[starts the car and back out]'' Goodbye, house. Goodbye, mailbox! ''[accidentally runs over his fence while turning into the street]'' Goodbye, pile of broken wood.
:'''Max''': Goodbye, hopes. Goodbye, dreams. Goodbye, Roxanne. Roxanne! Dad, I gotta stop somewhere first. I have to talk to someone!
:'''Goofy''': Well... ''[Max grabs the steering wheel and the car swerves down a side street. After knocking over a few things, the car stops in front of Roxanne's house and gets out of the car]'' Now make it quick, Maxie boy. We gotta put some road behind us.
:'''Max''': ''[walks up to the front door]'' You get to cancel your first date in less than an hour. ''[rings the doorbell]'' Must be some kind of lame-o record. ''[The door opens to reveal a rather mean looking person who growls at Max. It's Roxanne's father]'' Hi! Is Roxanne home? Uh, my name is Max. Does Roxanne live here? Does she even live on this block?
:'''Roxanne''': Wait! It's OK, Daddy. Max is a friend from school. Go on. Go on. Good Daddy. Hey, Max. You wanna have a seat?
:''[Roxanne's father lovingly pats Roxanne and growls at Max again. Max mumbles something. Roxanne's father peeks through the mail slot]''
:'''Roxanne''': Daddy! ''[Roxanne's father eventually goes away and lets Roxanne have her private time with Max]'' I promise he'll be better behaved when you pick me up for the party.
:'''Max''': Yeah, that's, uh, sorta why I came by.
:'''Roxanne''': I'm really looking forward to it, Max.
:'''Max''': Yeah, I was, too.
:'''Roxanne''': Was?
:'''Max''': Well, you see my dad’s on this stupid father/son kick, and...
:'''Roxanne''': Oh, don't worry about it, Max. It's just a dumb party.
:'''Max''': No, it's not! Roxanne, I really wanted to go with you. I...
:'''Roxanne''': No, Max, I understand. Really, it's OK, these things happen...
:'''Max''': My dad surprised me, I don't even wanna go, but I have no choice.
:'''Roxanne''': I'm sure I can find someone else.
:'''Max''': Someone else?
:'''Roxanne''': I'll just talk to you later.
:'''Max''': ''[thinking quickly]'' Um, uh, Roxanne, my dad’s taking me to the Powerline concert in Los Angeles!
:'''Roxanne''': Your dad’s taking you clear across the country just to see a concert?
:'''Max''': Uh... well - you see, my dad knows Powerline! They used to play together in a band! Yeah!
:'''Goofy''': Come on, son! Let's get this show on the road!
:'''Max''': Just a minute, you party animal, you.
:''[Goofy grins]''
:'''Roxanne''': You're really serious!
:'''Max''': Absolutely. So you aren't still thinking of going with someone else, are you?
:'''Roxanne''': Well, I guess...
:'''Max''': Because, I was hoping I could, uh, wave to you on-stage when we join Powerline for the final number.
:'''Roxanne''': This is incredible!
:'''Max''': Well - I wouldn't miss our date for anything that wasn't incredible, Roxanne.
:'''Roxanne''': ''[kisses Max on the cheek]'' Have a great time at the concert, Max. I'll see you on TV!
:'''Max''': I'm in deep sludge.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The scene fades to Max and Goofy, leaving the city. Goofy is driving and running a video camera at the same time]''
:'''Goofy''': Day one: Well, here we are, out on the open road! Retracing the steps of my boyhood and here's Maxie! Say, &quot;Hi&quot;, Max! ''[Max doesn't respond]'' Well, how 'bout a wave?
:'''Max''': ''[puts his hand in front of the lens]'' Not now, dad.
:'''Goofy''': ''[puts the camera down, then notices that Max look really depressed]'' What a kidder! ''[gets an idea and takes out a list from one of his pockets]'' Hmmm. Fun and games I used to play with my dad. Road bingo... Twenty q---- ''[to Max]'' Hey, Maxie! Uh, let's play a game. You think of a name and I'll try and guess who it is. Uh, man or woman?
:'''Max''': ''[disgusted]'' Oh, man!
:'''Goofy''': Man, huh? Hmmm. That's a toughie! Uh, let's see... Walt Disney!
:'''Max''': Right.
:'''Goofy''': I'm good at this. Now, I'll think of one. Hmm... ''[Max turns on the radio which plays Santa Monica by Everclear and starts doing air guitar]'' Oh, you wanna sing a song, huh? Me and my dad used to sing this one all the time! ''[puts in an 8-track tape which interrupts the rock music and starts playing &quot;High Hopes&quot;. Goofy sings along]'' He's got high hopes! He's got high apple pie in the sky hopes! 
:''[Max changes back to Santa Monica. Goofy changes back to High Hopes. It goes back and forth until they break the radio]''
:'''Max''': ''[fed up with Goofy]'' Oh, great, Dad! Now we don't have any music!
:'''Goofy''': Oh, Maxie, it's not so bad. We'll just have to entertain ourselves!
:''[The beat is established by the car keys; one of them contains the letter D. The car backfiring joins in. The cooking equipment also joins in. Goofy starts to whistle the tune]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' Do ya need a break from modern living? Do ya long to shed your weary load? If your nerves are raw and your brain is fried, just grab a friend and take a ride together upon the open road! ''[spoken]'' Come on, Maxie!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' All in all, I'd rather have detention. All in all, I'd rather eat a toad. An old man drives that's such a klutz that I'm about to hurl my guts directly upon the open road!
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' There's nothing can upset me 'cause now we're on our way! Our trusty map will guide us straight and true!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' Roxanne please don't forget me, I will return some day. Though I may be in traction when I do!
:''[Wilhelm screams]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' Me and Max relaxing like the old days! In a buddy-buddy kind of mode!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' This is worse than dragon breath and acne! I'm so mad I think I may explode!
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' When I see that highway I could cry!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' You know, that's funny, so could I!
:'''Both''': ''[singing]'' Just being out on the open road!
:''[a piano player appears on the open road; the piano player is in a pickup truck; a trio of cowgirl singers pop out of the piano]''
:'''CW Girls in pickup''': ''[singing]'' Howdy boys! Is this the way to Nashville?
:'''Tow Truck driver''': ''[singing]'' Watch it, Mack! Or you'll be getting towed!
:'''Con in paddy wagon''': ''[singing]'' I'm in no hurry to arrive 'cause I'll be turning sixty-five, the next time I sees the open road. ''[Goofy sees the jailbird and imagines Max as a jailbird, reminding him of Principal Mazur's warning as he escapes from the worse]''
:'''Wendell''': ''[singing]'' Just a week of rest and relaxation.
:'''Wendell's Wife''': Yeah!
:'''Wendell''': And the odd romantic episode!
:'''Max''': ''[spoken]'' Very odd!
:''[Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck are hitchhiking]''
:'''Mickey Mouse''': ''[singing]'' And it's Californ-eye-ay or bust!
:'''Little Old Lady From Pasadena''': ''[singing]'' Look out you dirtbags! Eat my dust! From now on, I own the open road!
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' It's me and little Maxie, my pip-squeak pioneer!
:'''Nuns''': ''[singing]'' They're pardners forever &quot;Westward Ho!&quot; ''[spoken]'' Yee-haw!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' Could someone call a taxi and get me outta here, to Beverly Hills 90210?
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' Oh, every day another new adventure! Every mile another new zip code! And the cares we had are gone for good!
:'''Max''': ''[singing upon seeing a carsick man]'' And I'd go with them if I could.
:'''All''': ''[singing]'' I got no strings on me! I'm feeling fancy free! How wonderful to be on the open road!
:''[one of the cooking equipments gets knocked off]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The scene fades to the next day. Goofy is driving with the map in front of him so he can't see. Max is moping. The car drifts left of the center. Max glances up and sees a truck coming as his expression changes to concern. The truck horn blows. Max looks alarmed. The truck horn blows again. Max grabs the steering wheel and turns the car back into the right lane just as the truck goes by and would have run into him, his dad, and the car]''
:'''Max''': ''[ticked off]'' Dad, you're gonna get us killed! Why don't you just give me the map?
:'''Goofy''': Oh, no thanks, son. Navigating's a big responsibility! Besides, you wouldn't wanna spoil the big surprise. I'm taking ya someplace pretty special! ''[Goofy and Max pull into a rather seedy looking attraction called Lester's Possum Park and stop]'' Gawrsh! It's even better than I remembered!
:''[The scene cuts to a mother attempting to drag her little daughter through the entrance to the park, which resembles the mouth of a possum]''
:'''Little girl''': No! Mommy! I don't wanna go!
:'''Max''': ''[not interested]'' Yeah, fun. Tell ya what: I'm just gonna wait right here in the car.
:'''Goofy''': ''[grabs Max and drags him]'' Ya party pooper! Come on! This is gonna be fun!
:''[The scene cuts to the interior of a small old theater]''
:'''Possum Park Emcee''': Howdy there, folks. Lester's is proud to present the Possum Posse Jamboree. Here it is.
:''[Several patrons clap for the show as Goofy and Max enter]''
:'''Goofy''': Oh, boy! Just in time!
:''[The curtain opens and shows four holes in the ground. Out of one of the holes comes a mechanical possum named Lester which has obviously seen better days]''
:'''Lester''': Howdy, folks! Who's your favorite possum?
:'''Patrons''': Lester!
:'''Goofy''': I got us a seat right up front!
:'''Lester''': Let me introduce you to the posse! Here's Buford, Beulah and Mordechai!
:'''Buford''': ''[stuck in his hole]'' Hey, Lester, ready for yodeling?
:'''Lester''': Sure am, Buford. ''[singing]'' Now gather 'round, my possum pals and join the jamboree. 
:'''Max''': This is pathetic! ''[A pigtailed girl smiles at Max]''
:'''Lester''': ''[singing]'' Come hoot 'n' howl 'n' holler from the heart and every chicken, pig, 'n' goat'll help by yelping out a yodel here at Lester's Possum Park! ''[speaking]'' Join in, folks! It's yodeling time!
:''[Many patrons join in the yodeling including Goofy. Max just looks disgusted]''
:'''Lester''': ''[singing]'' Lester's Possum Park.
:''[Max is getting more and more disgusted at the show]''
:'''Lester''': ''[singing]'' Well don't you wanna be, a'hanging from a tree? We're mighty glad to see ya and the parking's always free! ''[begins to break down]'' Here at Lester's Possum Park!
:'''Goofy''': ''[sees a souvenir stand and gets an idea]'' Hey! That's the ticket! I'll be right back, my little possum pal!
:'''Max''': ''[sighs]'' My life's a living.
:'''Lester''': Hello, little buddy! Who's your favorite possum?
:'''Max''': ''[getting annoyed]'' Don't touch me.
:'''Lester''': Aw, why such a long face? You're so sad! Boo hoo hoo! I know! You need a big hug from Lester.
:'''Max''': ''[angrily gives Lester a warning with his finger]'' Don't even think about it...!
:'''Lester''': ''[gives Max a giant hug which ticks him off]'' See? Now you feel all good inside!
:'''Max''': ''[angrily slaps Lester which turns his false head backward]'' Beat it, doofus! ''[Lester staggers off unable to see where he is going and is knocked down and dragged off by several kids]'' Oh no, no, Dad! Not that, please!
:'''Goofy''': ''[comes back wearing a dead possum hat and puts one on Max]'' Here ya go, sport! Let's say we get our picture taken!
:''[The scene cuts to the little pigtailed girl crying while her picture is taken]''
:'''Max''': You have got to be kidding.
:'''Goofy''': Oh, all right. But you're missing out! ''[foolishly hangs upside down between two possums to get his picture taken]'' Hiya, son! ''[A lot of people laughing]''
:'''Kid''': Hey, everyone! Check out the dork!
:'''Photographer''': Say, &quot;sassafras&quot;.
:'''Goofy''': Sassyfrass! ''[The branch breaks and Goofy falls to the ground. This sends one of the two possums hurdling toward Max and it hits him in the face. The possum then crawls down Max's sweatshirt. Max beings to jump around in an attempt to get at the possum. A couple of musicians start playing country music, mistaking Max's gyrations for an attempt at dance]'' That's the spirit, Maxie! ''[grabs Max and starts dancing with him]''
:'''Max''': ''[embarrassed]'' Dad, stop, please! Dad, look, this is embarrassing!
:'''Goofy''': ''[finally finished the dance with Max on his knee]'' Ta-da! Hyuck!
:'''Kid''': It's Dork and Dork Junior!
:''[Max gets ticked off and takes the hat off his head, furiously throws it to the ground and angrily fights his way out of the crowd. He furiously goes to the car only to find it locked. He angrily pounds his fists on the door just as it starts to rain. He furiously walks to the highway and angrily starts hitchhiking. A passing car sprays him with water, but he angrily continues to hitchhike]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[comes out]'' Max! Hey, what the heck you trying to do?
:'''Max''': Trying to get away from you! ''[furiously leaves the highway and angrily goes back to the car]''
:'''Goofy''':  Me? What'd I do?
:'''Max''': Forget it!
:'''Goofy''': I thought we was having fun. What's the matter?
:'''Max''': Nothing. Let's just go. Well, come on!
:'''Goofy''': ''[sadly unlocked the door and Max gets in, goes around and gets in too, then hands Max the hat he threw away which infuriates him]'' Oh, you dropped your hat.
:'''Max''': ''[furiously blows up, screams in frustration, angrily yells at Goofy, and furiously takes his hat, but lividly rolls down the window, and angrily throws the hat away again]'' This is the stupidest vacation! You drag me from home, you jam me in this dumb car, then drive me a million miles away to see some stupid rat show! Call me when the trip's over. ''[Goofy sadly starts the car and drives off]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The scene fades to a campground, where Goofy is setting up a tent and Max is sitting on a rock by a river. He is stirring the water with a stick. In the ripples, he imagines he sees the face of Roxanne. Suddenly, Goofy steps in the middle of her image]''
:'''Goofy''': Hey, Max. You wanna get in some fishing practice? Just a couple of days 'til we get to Lake Destiny.
:'''Max''': Maybe later. ''[wanders off]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[sadly returns to the tent and begins to unroll a sleeping bag. While in the tent, a huge RV rolls over the top of the tent and proceeds to produce a hot tub, a basketball court, a bowling alley and a swimming pool]''
:'''Max''': ''[comes back to see what's happening]'' Whoa! Now that's camping!
:'''Goofy''': You say something, Max? ''[gets hit by a door of RV]'' Ow! Pete?
:'''Pete''': Goofy? What a serendipity do dah! Who'da thunk it, huh?!
:'''Max''': Is PJ here?
:'''Pete''': Who? Oh, yeah. I'm sure he's loafing around here somewhere.
:''[The scene cuts to the inside of the RV. PJ is buffing the floor and dusting while listening to Powerline on the stereo. He is singing along]''
:'''Max''': What a goob! ''[turns off the stereo]''
:'''PJ''': ''[begins treating the buffer like a microphone, still singing]'' Stand out! Above the crowd! Even if you got to shout out loud! No matter what you look it's Max I get... ''[spoken]'' Max!
:'''Max''': Hey-hey-hey!
:'''PJ''': Woah! Small wilderness, dude! Didn't expect to run into you.
:'''Max''': Apparently not!
:'''PJ''': You're just jealous man, 'cause you ain't got the moves!
:'''Max''': Yeah, you can keep the moves. But I wouldn't mind having this RV. You're so lucky, man!
:'''PJ''': Me? Awww, come on! You're the star!
:'''Max''': What are you...
:'''PJ''': Going to the Powerline concert! Awww, it's unbelievable, man!
:'''Max''': Who told you about that?
:'''PJ''': Hey, come on! Everybody in town knows about it, Max. ''[discusses Max's alleged trip to the Powerline concert]'' You're gonna be famous, buddy. Especially with Roxanne.
:'''Max''': There's just one person who doesn't know about this, PJ.
:'''PJ''': Who?
:'''Max''': My dad.
:''[The scene cuts to the roof of the RV where Pete and Goofy are. Pete begins to go bowling]''
:'''Pete''': So tell me, Goof. Is that kid of yours still giving you guff?
:'''Goofy''': Oh, I don't know what's wrong. Just seems like everything I try only drives Max further away. Maybe I oughta just back off, I don't know.
:'''Pete''': Wrong, Goof. Look, if you keep 'em under your thumb, they'll never end up in the gutter.
:'''Goofy''': Too bad, Pete. Almost.
:'''Pete''': ''[angrily looks at Goofy]'' Almost? Hah! Watch this. ''[yelling loudly]'' &lt;big&gt;'''PJ!!!'''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''PJ''': ''[runs up to the top of the RV]'' Here, sir! Coming, sir! Yes, sir!
:'''Pete''': ''[points at the pin. PJ goes over and kicks it down]'' Whoo-hoo! Strike-ola! Yee-haw! Thank you. Thank you. Yes! And the crowd goes wild! Ahh-ha-ha-ha! High five, son! Psych! Ha-ha-ha-ha! Say, Goof. Why don't you two stay for dinner?
:'''Max''': Cool!
:'''Goofy''': Oh, no thanks, Pete. Max and I have some [[w:fish|fish]] to catch.
:'''Max''': ''[angrily sighs]'' Dad, we can do that tomorrow. ''[to Pete]'' So what are we having?
:'''Goofy''': But Max, I thought...
:'''Pete''': ''[clears throat]'' Under your thumb, Goof.
:'''Goofy''': ''[sternly confronts Max]'' Maximilian!
:'''Max''': ''[annoyed]'' What?
:'''Goofy''': ''[sternly orders Max]'' Get your gear, little man! We're going fishing! ''[loudly shouts]'' And I mean '''''NOW!''''' ''[Max walks away]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Max''': Dad, I don't even know how to fish.
:'''Goofy''': Oh, now come on. That never stopped me! Let me show ya a little family secret handed down through about twelve or thirteen Goof generations: The Perfect Cast.
:'''Max''': The Perfect What?
:'''Goofy''': The Perfect Cast. My dad taught it to me when I was about your age. OK now, watch carefully. You gotta be loose. Relaxed. With your feet apart, and... Ten o'clock. Two o'clock. Quarter to three! Tour Jete! Twist! Over! Pas de deux! I'm a little teapot! And the windup...!
:''[Goofy's line goes all the way back to where Pete is barbecuing steaks. The hook grabs a steak]'' And let 'er fly! ''[The Perfect Cast. The hook with the steak go sailing and land on the bank of the river a fair ways away in the middle of a large footprint. Two feet that match the footprint then come up. It's Bigfoot, who is holding a log. He chews on the log, but stops and sniffs, then sees the steak]'' And now, we reel 'er in. ''[Bigfoot is about to take the steak when Goofy starts to real it in. Bigfoot chases the steak and finally catches it. He bites it and is pulled by Goofy.]'' Quick! Get the camera! ''[They manage to get back to the bank and Max hands the camera to Goofy]'' Must be over three pounds! I don't wanna miss this! ''[Whispers]'' Look, Max!
:'''Max''': ''[Horrorly screams]'' Uh, Dad, It's BIGFOOT!
:'''Goofy''': Could you back up a bit, Mr. Foot? Uh, you're out of focus. ''[Bigfoot ferociously roars at Goofy and Max. The steak sails back at Pete and hits him in the face]''
:'''Pete''': ''[angrily pulls off the steak]'' What's the idea? ''[sees Max and Goofy running from Bigfoot and screaming]'' BIGFOOT!!! ''[grabs the BBQ, throws it in the RV, retracts all the equipment attached to the RV and drives off, leaving Goofy's tent where it was]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[runs backward getting Bigfoot on video]'' Behold the legendary Bigfoot! Fabled but seldom... Whoa! ''[clumsily trips over the tent and the camera goes flying]''
:'''Max''': ''[tries to get in the car]'' It's locked!
:'''Goofy''': Quick! The sun roof! ''[starts rolling the window closed]''
:'''Max''': Hurry up! Hurry up! ''[The window closes just as Bigfoot gets there. He rocks the car back and forth for a moment, then notices all the equipment Goofy had unpacked. He goes to investigate]'' I can't believe it... Bigfoot!
:'''Goofy''': And I've got the only video!
:'''Max''': We're gonna be famous! ''[disgusted]'' Let's just get outta here. ''[Goofy feels for the keys but Bigfoot has found them outside and tosses them away. Bigfoot has discovered the camera and is pulling the tape out in shreds. He then continues rummaging through their equipment. The scene fades to late evening. Goofy and Max are still in the car]'' Is he gone yet?
:''[Bigfoot does a puppet show using socks. Then goes back to rummaging]''
:'''Goofy''': Nope. Still here. ''[Max's stomach growls]'' Gee, Max. Was that Bigfoot or your stomach?
:'''Max''': ''[feels his stomach]'' Man, I'm starving!
:''[A can of alphabet soup lands on the hood of the car]''
:'''Goofy''': Alphabet soup coming up! ''[rolls down the window and tries to grab the can]''
:''[Bigfoot hears and turns around, roars ferociously, starts coming toward the car and runs toward it]''
:'''Max''': Dad, stop playing around! He's coming! ''[grabs his father's hand and turns it so the can gets through]''
:''[Bigfoot crashes into the side of the car and is sent sprawling along with a lot of the equipment he dragged along. He lands and a pair of headphones lands on his head, which is playing &quot;Stayin' Alive&quot; by Bee Gees. Bigfoot is startled at first, then begins to enjoy it. The scene cuts to the inside of the car where Goofy has just taken the cigarette lighter out of the dashboard]''
:'''Goofy''': Well, it's nice to know this thing’s good for something. ''[balances the can of soup over the lighter]''
:''[While they wait for the soup to heat up, they sit. Bigfoot does the hustle in the background. Max and Goofy catch each other looking at the other and quickly look away. Goofy then smiles and starts to chuckle]''
:'''Max''': What's so funny?
:'''Goofy''': &quot;Hi Dad&quot; Soup!
:'''Max''': Huh?
:'''Goofy''': Don't tell me you don't remember &quot;Hi Dad&quot; Soup. Oh, come on! Sure you do! You used to spell things out using the letters, like, uh, &quot;Hi Dad&quot; or &quot;Maxie&quot; or...
:'''Max''': ...&quot;Ambidextrous&quot;...
:'''Goofy''': Yeah, that's...Nah, little words, like...
:'''Max''': &quot;Hasta la vista&quot;?
:'''Goofy''': Like &quot;Bye bye&quot;!
:'''Max''': ...or &quot;I pledge allegiance&quot;...
:'''Goofy''': ...or &quot;I love you&quot;...
:''[Both Max and Goofy suddenly look sad]''
:'''Max''': Is it soup yet?
:'''Goofy''': Oh, I almost forgot! ''[uses his teeth to create two holes in the top of the can]''
:'''Max''': Woah! Where'd you learn to do that?
:'''Goofy''': Your granddad taught me that when we went to Yosemite.
:'''Max''': You two did a lot together, huh?
:'''Goofy''': Yup. ''[Now looks sad. Suddenly Goofy and Max talk simultaneously]'' Max, you and I have to...
:'''Max''': Dad, listen I have a...
:'''Goofy''': How’s the soup?
:'''Max''': ''[drinks and leaves a soup mustache on his upper lip]'' Not bad. ''[sees his dad grinning]'' What?
:'''Goofy''': ''[Seeing Max with a mustache reminds Goofy of what Max was like as a little boy and just grins]'' Nothing. ''[Bigfoot climbs on top of the car and settles down to sleep]'' Welp, might as well get some shut eye. I don't think we're going anywhere tonight. ''[gets comfortable. Max looks lovingly at his dad, then down at the remnants of the soup in his cup. He fiddles with something at the bottom. Max then taps his father and hands him the cup. Goofy looks at the bottom of the cup to see the words &quot;Hi Dad&quot; spelled out. Goofy gets choked up and looks over at Max, who is settling down to sleep]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[whispering]'' Hi, Maxie. 
:''[The scene fades to later that night. Both Bigfoot and Goofy are snoring. Max can't sleep because of the noise. So, he finds a postcard and begins to write]''
:'''Max''': ''[writing]'' Dear Roxanne, Couldn't sleep... so I thought I'd drop ya a line. Dad and I are having a great time. We're only days away from Los Angeles and I can hardly wait for the big concert. ''[stops writing and looks sad. Then looks over at Goofy]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[in his sleep]'' More Hi Dad Soup, please.
:'''Max''': ''[gets a half smile on his face looking at his dad, then decides to re-write the postcard]'' Dear Roxanne, sorry I lied, but I'm not really going to the Powerline concert. You may never wanna see me again... ''[stops when he realizes that won't work either]'' Oh, man! I'm dead no matter what I do! ''[angrily stomps his foot on the dashboard. The glove compartment pops open and the map unfolds into his lap. He follows the route on it to Lake Destiny and then looks down to Los Angeles. A pencil rolls out of the glove compartment and conveniently stops, pointing from the route on the map directly to Los Angeles Max picks up the pencil then starts erasing. He then draws a new route to Los Angeles. The pencil tip breaks just before he finishes. Goofy yawns. Max breaks out in a cold sweat, picks up the pencil tip and finishes the drawing, puts the map back in the glove compartment and sits back nervously as Goofy seems to awaken]''
:'''Goofy''': How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?
:'''Max''': Uh... three and a half? ''[Goofy goes back to sleep]'' ''[sighs, looks at the postcard and then tears it up, opens the car window and throws the pieces outside into the wind. The pieces are carried toward the camera. One piece gets caught in a branch close up, with the words, &quot;I lied&quot; written on it]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The scene fades to a truck stop the next morning. The short order cook rings a bell on the order counter]''
:'''Cook''': Pick up!
:'''Waitress''': Hold your horses! ''[picks up the food and carries it to Max and Goofy]'' Short stack?
:'''Goofy''': Right here!
:'''Waitress''': ''[gives the pancakes to Goofy]'' Here you go, hon. Eggs? Eggs? Eggs!
:'''Max''': Oh! Oh! Yeah, yeah! Right here! Sorry.
:'''Waitress''': ''[gives the eggs and bacon to Max.]'' Here you go, cutie.
:''[The eggs and strip of bacon form a face. Goofy digs into his pancakes, then notices that Max, who was so hungry the night before is picking at his eggs and looking nervously at the map]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[picks up the map, waving it at Max]'' Max, I think we need to talk about this.
:'''Max''': Huh?
:'''Goofy''': Seems to me you need to start taking some responsibility around here. Excuse me. Uh, can I have your attention please? ''[clears throat]'' I, Goofy, hereby dub my son, Maximillian, official navigator and head which-wayer of this here road trip!
:'''Max''': Seriously?
:'''Goofy''': I'm not even looking at the map anymore. As a matter of fact, you can pick all the stops from here to Lake Destiny. I trust ya wholeheartedly, son. To the open road! ''[picks up his coffee cup]''
:'''Max''': To the open road.
:''[With Goofy driving and Max navigating, they continue their journey, stopping at a beach, where Goofy has a terrible time with a jetski, they change a flat tire, at an amusement park Goofy can't stomach the roller coaster, at a monster truck rally where Goofy can't stand the noise. Max notices this and decides his dad needs something he likes, so their next stop is the amazing house of yarn--one of the stops on Goofy's map. A stop in New Orleans is next with an encounter with the mime. Goofy acts along with the mime, and later, a piano falls and lands right on top on the mime. They change another flat tire, they visit &quot;Carl's Butt Caverns&quot; and accidentally awaken the bats and speaking of bats then attend a baseball game where they get an autographed baseball by very unusual means, they change another flat tire and pull into the &quot;Neptune Inn&quot; motel for the night. They take a couple of suitcases and open the door to the room]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Goofy''': Gosh!
:'''Max''': ''[notices the waterbeds with goldfish]'' Whoa ho ho! Check out the bed!
:'''Goofy''': Check out the dresser--coral!
:'''Max''': ''[turns a mermaid lamp off and on]'' Nice lamp!
:'''Goofy''': Classy choice there, navigator.
:'''Pete''': This is the police! We've got the place surrounded, see! You Goofs come out with your hands up! ''[starts laughing]'' You should've seen the look on your face!
:'''Goofy''': You really had him fooled, Pete!
:'''Max''': Me? You jumped out of your skin!
:'''Goofy''': Uh uh! I was just pretending for your sake!
:'''Max''': Oh, right! Sure!
:'''Goofy''': Did too!
:'''Max''': Did not!
:'''Pete''': Oh, ain't this sweet! ''[aside to Goofy]'' Don't let him fool you with that buddy-buddy act, now. Under your thumb! ''[thumbs Goofy's nose]'' So, since we're all being palsy-walsy here, how about letting me hook up the RV?
:'''Goofy''': Well...
:'''Pete''': Oh, it's just a tiny little extension cord. You'll hardly even notice it.
:'''Goofy''': OK.
:'''Pete''': Great! PJ!
:''[PJ comes in hauling an enormous array of ducts and cables. Pete points into the room. PJ hauls it all in]''
:'''Pete''': Hey, Goof. Why don't ya order us a pizza? This might take a while.
:''[Goofy gets the pizza, then brings it in to PJ and Max]''
:'''PJ''': ...no I mean it, they...
:'''Goofy''': Here ya go, kids. I'm gonna go check out the hot tub.
:'''PJ''': Oh, OK, sir!
:'''Max''': All right.
:'''PJ''': I can't believe you, man. Whatever made you think your dad would fall for a stupid idea like that?
:'''Max''': It wasn't stupid!
:'''PJ''': Come on, it was really stupid! Changing the map?
:'''Max''': Look, I didn't know what I was doing, all right? I was panicked!
:''[Goofy gets in the hot tub and is joined shortly thereafter by Pete]''
:'''Pete''': Taking a break from the MTV generation, huh? Can't say I blame ya. People are always putting too much water in these things. So, um... you and your son seem to be, uh, getting along just hunky-dory, huh?
:'''Goofy''': Yeah, it's been great! You know, it's funny, but none of your techniques worked for me. The harder I tried, the worse it got. Once I eased up, things just clicked!
:'''Pete''': Oh, that's swell. So, there's no problems then, huh?
:'''Goofy''': Not a one!
:'''Pete''': That's, uh I just hate to be the bearer of bad news, but uh...
:'''Goofy''': What is it, Pete?
:'''Pete''': Your kid's duping ya.
:'''Goofy''': What do you mean?
:'''Pete''': Well, I heard the little mutant telling PJ that he changed the map, so you're heading straight to Los Angeles, pal.
:'''Goofy''': What?
:'''Pete''': Oh, you tried, Goof. He's just a bad kid, that's all.
:'''Goofy''': I don't believe you.
:'''Pete''': What?
:'''Goofy''': I don't believe ya, Pete!
:'''Pete''': Well, hey, don't take my word for it. Check your map.
:'''Goofy''': I don't need to check the map. I trust my son. ''[with a quietly defiant mien]'' You know, maybe Max isn't all the things that you think a son should be, but he loves me.
:'''Pete''': Hey, ''my'' son (PJ) ''respects'' me.
:'''Goofy''': ''[listlessly]'' Yeah. ''[walks away]''
:'''Pete''': ''[calling after him]'' Check the map, Goof!
:''[Goofy walks back to the room, but decides to get in the car instead. He reaches for the glove compartment, then stop. He thinks, gets upset and angrily pounds the steering wheel and starts to get out. The glove compartment pops open and the map spills out. The scene cuts to an aerial shot of the motel with Goofy's car centered. Goofy goes back to the room]''
:'''Max''': Hi, dad. Sorry about the mess. I'll clean it up.
:''[Goofy looks absolutely dumbstruck and disillusioned. He gets in bed and turns off the light]''
:'''PJ''': ''[whispering]'' I think I better go.
:'''Max''': ''[whispering]'' See ya, PJ.
:'''PJ''': ''[whispering]'' Don't forget Powerline!
:'''Max''': Shhh!
:''[Goofy still has that look of disillusionment and sadness as he lies in bed]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The shot twists and the scene fades to the next morning as Goofy is driving with the same look. He looks over at Max who nervously grins. A sign comes up showing a junction with only left and right turn]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[grabs the map and gives it to Max]'' Well, here ya go, navigator. Just follow my route on the map, son.
:'''Max''': OK.
:''[They pass another sign pointing right to Idaho and left to California]''
:'''Goofy''': Here comes our junction. OK, Max, now this is it. Left or right? 
:'''Max''': ''[nervously]'' Uh...
:'''Goofy''': Come on, Max!
:'''Max''': LEFT! ''[The car scrapes the center divider as they barely make it up the left ramp. Max looks back, then sighs. Goofy looks annoyed. Max nervously smiles]'' Uh... how 'bout a song, Dad? A game? A game! Yeah! Yeah, a game! OK! Uh, man or woman? Man? Man! OK! Uh, Walt Disney! ''[Goofy angrily swerves the car to a scenic overlook and stops the car, lividly fumbles with the seat belt, furiously gets out and ragefully stomps over to the stone wall at the edge of the overlook, fuming]'' Dad... Listen, about my directions... Will you listen to me? I gotta tell you something, Dad.
:'''Goofy''': ''[sarcastically]'' Why bother? I'm probably too stupid to understand anyway, right?
:'''Max''': Aw, forget it!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Max''': ''[angrily kicks the tire and then leans on the hatchback. The car rolls forward and leaves him sprawling in the dirt]'' Hey-hey-hey! The car!
:'''Goofy''': ''[turns around]'' What? Now you wanna drive too?
:'''Max''': No, Dad! The car! ''[points at the car]'' LOOK!
:'''Goofy''': ''[shocked]'' The car! ''[Max and Goofy chase their runaway car]'' What'd you do now, Max?!
:'''Max''': I didn't do anything, Dad! I only touched it!
:''[The car goes under a low underpass and knocks their equipment off. Goofy steps on a skateboard and Max joins him. They catch up with the car]''
:'''Goofy''': ''[manages to grab the door handle]'' You locked it!
:'''Max''': ''[enraged]'' I locked it? It's your door. You locked it!
:'''Goofy''': Well, you distracted me!
:'''Max''': You should've put the brake on! ''[pulls his father into the car]''
:'''Goofy''': Why don't you just put it on yourself? ''[He pulls the brake, but it suddenly breaks off]''
:'''Max''': See? You ruin everything!
:'''Goofy''': Well, you ruined the vacation!
:'''Max''': ''I'' ruined it?! ''[The car goes crashing from one rock pillar to another]'' I never wanted to go on this stupid '''''VACATION!''''' ''[The car splashes into the river. The car has landed in the stream with the Goofs inside]'' Now look where you got us, Dad!
:'''Goofy''': Where ''I'' got us?!
:'''Max''': You should have let me stay at home!
:'''Goofy''': Why? So you'd end up in [[w:prison|prison]]?
:'''Max''': Prison? What are you talking about?
:'''Goofy''': Your principal called me!
:'''Max''': It's not what you think, Dad!
:'''Goofy''': You even lied to me!
:'''Max''': I had to! You were ruining my life!
:'''Goofy''': I was only trying to take my boy fishing, OK?!
:'''Max''': I'm not your little boy anymore, Dad! I'm grown up! I've got my own life now!
:'''Goofy''': '''''I KNOW THAT!''''' I just wanted to be part of it! ''[calmer]'' You're my son, Max. No matter how big ya get, you'll always be my son.
:''[The car slowly drifts downstream and Goofy and Max sadly sit on the roof with their backs to each other. The sun breaks through the clouds and Max finally decides to break the silence]''
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' There are times you drive me, shall we say, bananas... and your mind is missing, no offense, a screw...
:'''Goofy''': ''[spoken]'' None taken!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' Still, whatever mess I land in, who is always understanding? Nobody else but you!
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' Oh, you moodiness is now and then bewildering... and you values may be, so to speak, askew!
:'''Max''': ''[spoken]'' Gesundheit!
:'''Goofy''': ''[spoken]'' Thanks! ''[singing]'' Who deserves a hero's trophy as we face each catastrophe? Nobody else but you!
:'''Both''': ''[singing]'' Nobody else but you! It's just our luck. We're stuck together! Nobody else but you! It's crazy enough to believe we'll come through!
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' So your jokes are all, let's face it, prehistoric!
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' And your music sounds like monkeys in a zoo!
:'''Both''': ''[singing]'' But when life becomes distressing, who will I be S-O-S-ing?
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' If you're having trouble guessing here's a clue! 'Though he seems intoxicated, he's just highly animated! And he's nobody else but...
:'''Both''': ''[singing]'' Nobody else but you! We've turned into a true blue duo! Hard times--we've had a few...
:'''Goofy''': ''[singing]'' Like we're thrown in the drink...
:'''Max''': ''[singing]'' Like we're tossed out of town...
:'''Both''': ''[singing]'' But when I start to sink, hey, I'd rather go down with nobody else but you!
:''[Goofy kisses Max]''
:'''Max''': ''[spoken]'' Aw, Dad!
:''[The scene fades to further down river. Max has apparently explained everything he did and why]''
:'''Max''': ...Well, anyway. I figure she's never gonna wanna talk to me again, much less go out with me. What a dumb lie, huh?
:'''Goofy''': Well, whaddya know. My Maxie -- in love! Gosh, you're really growing up! It happened so fast, I... guess I sort of missed it! Welp, I think the only thing for us to do now is to get you up on stage with this Powerline fellar.
:'''Max''': Uh, how are we gonna do that?
:'''Goofy''': Now, you just leave that up to me.
:'''Max''': No, Dad, really. I-I think we should just, you know, forget it.
:'''Goofy''': Now, how come you always think I'm gonna lead ya into some sort of calamity?
:'''Max''': ''[looks ahead, shocked]'' Duh, duh, Dad?
:'''Goofy''': What's wrong now?
:'''Max''': ''[turns his dad’s head forward]'' LOOK!
:''[The car is approaching a high waterfall]''
:'''Goofy''': A waterfall. ''[panicked]'' WATERFALL?!?!
:''[Goofy and Max attempt to paddle upstream and succeed only for a bit, but fail when the tide gets too much stronger. Goofy gets thrown from the car and grabs a rock. Max continues toward the falls on the car]''
:'''Max''': DAD!
:'''Goofy''': Max! ''[A fishing pole hits Goofy in the back of the head. Goofy grabs it and climbs over the rock formations trying to find a good place to try and reach for Max. He finally gets to a log and climbs to the end of it. He extends the pole toward Max]'' Grab a hold, Max!
:''[Max obeys, tries to grab hold and misses the line, that is reaching out to him. The car goes over a rock in the river and flips over]''
:'''Max''': Whoa! ''[Goofy gasps as Max gets tangled in a tarp. He tries to stop the car from going over the falls by casting the line to it and succeeds for a moment. Then the force of the falls breaks the log and Goofy is dumped in the river and crashes into a rock. Max looks down and gasps. He and the car go over the falls, still entangled in the tarp. As he screams and falls, the tarp becomes a parachute and the updraft from the falls carries him up above the falls. Max then sees his father heading for the edge of the falls]'' Dad!
:''[With a final effort, Goofy extends the fishing pole still in his hand toward Max in the moment in which he would tumble helplessly down below. Max grabs the end. For a moment, the two are dangling above the falls. They give a happy look at each other. Ignoring the exchange, the cork handle of the fishing pole, which is not able to hold on much longer and due to the weight of Max and his parachute tarp, comes off and snaps with a loud pop as Goofy begins to fall]''
:'''Goofy''': MAX!
:'''Max''': ''[almost without thinking and now remembering what his dad did at the fishing area, he spins the fishing pole around and starts doing the Perfect Cast and throws the line to his dad]'' Ten o'clock. Quarter to three. Tour Jete. Twist. I'm a little teapot. Let 'er fly! ''[The fishing line flies toward the retreating figure of Goofy, who screams while falling down. Both are soon lost in the mist at the base of the falls. Max begins to worry that he is too late. Then the line goes taut. Max gasps and begins to get pulled down, but starts reeling in the line. Soon, the figure of his father can be seen, hooked by the seat of his pants. Max, relieved, reels Goofy in all the way. Goofy with tears in his eyes knows how his son saved him]''
:'''Goofy''': The Perfect Cast.
:''[Goofy and Max hug each other. The map, blown by the wind lands on Goofy's head]''
:'''Max''': Boy, this has been one crazy vacation.
:'''Goofy''': And it's not over yet!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The map sails toward the camera and showing Los Angeles. The scene cuts to the Powerline concert. Cars are being directed in. A couple of people are tossing instrument cases into a loading dock. A drum case opens and Max gets out]''
:'''Max''': ''[whispers]'' Dad? [he opens a base fiddle base and Goofy falls out.]
:'''Goofy''': We made it! Come on, Max! Let's get you on stage!
:'''Max''': Uh, maybe this isn't such a good idea.
:''[A couple of spandex dressed dancers pass by Max. Max looks at them admiringly]''
:'''Max''': Uh, then again... ''[he notices that his dad is nowhere to be seren]'' Dad? Dad!
:''[The scene cuts to the stage. Powerline is starting his final number]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' I got myself a notion and one I know that you'll understand. We set the world in motion by reaching out for each other's hand.
:'''Max''': ''[under the stage trying to find Goofy.]'' Dad? ''[looks up and sees Powerline from the back]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' Maybe we'll discover what we should have known all along.
:''[Max has a flash light shine in his face]''
:'''Security Guard''': What are you doing here? Hey!
:''[Max runs from the guard]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' One way or another, together's where we both belong.
:'''Goofy''': ''[is backstage going through a hall of dressing rooms]'' Max? Max?
:''[Goofy opens one of the rooms and accidentally discovers Wendell's wife, who is trying to get dressed. She screams in alarm. Goofy looks extremely embarrassed. She hits Goofy and sends him tumbling backward into a rather large and imposing piece of equipment with a door in the side. The door closes with Goofy inside and then starts buzzing]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' If we listen to each other's heart, we'll find we're never too far apart and maybe love is the reason why, for the first time ever, we're seeing it I 2 I.
:''[Through the TV screen, we go to Stacey's party. Everyone is gathered around the TV hoping for a chance to see Max on TV]''
:'''Bobby''': That Goof kid ain't there!
:''[Roxanne looks worried]''
:'''Stacey''': ''[to Roxanne]'' Don't worry, he'll be there.
:''[The scene cuts back to Los Angeles, Max is running from the Security Guard and climbs onto a row of lights which rises. The Guard is right behind him. Goofy is now in a large globe, just like Powerline made his entrance in for the final number which begins to rise through a trap door in the stage]''
:'''Goofy''': Excuse me, but uh... ''[ends up accidentally center stage with Powerline. He squints into the audience]'' Max?
:''[Just as with Powerline, Goofy's globe is bathed with electrical charges. Goofy gets the shock of his life and the globe explodes, throwing Goofy at Powerline's feet. Powerline stops and stares at Goofy. Max, from the rafters, sees his dad, is first embarrassed, then gets an idea and shouts down to his dad]''
:'''Max''': Hey, Dad! Dad! Do the Perfect Cast!
:''[Goofy does it and it looks like some kind of dance. Powerline gets interested and joins Goofy right at the &quot;I'm a little teapot&quot; part]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' If you're ever lonely, stop. You don't have to be. After all it's only a beat away from you to me.
:''[The Guard crawls across the scaffolding to Max. Max leaps over him to the other side. The guy-wire breaks and Max grabs it. The guard grabs Max's feet and they both go sailing. The guard ends up smashing into a large TV display, and Max ends up center stage with Powerline. Max gets up and starts doing the Perfect Cast]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' If we listen to each other's heart, we'll find we're never too far apart.
:''[The scene cuts back to Stacey's party]''
:'''Bobby''': Yeah! Max is on the tu-ube! That's Max! I know him!
:''[Roxanne gets a big grin on her face]''
:'''Powerline''': ''[singing]'' And maybe love is the reason why for the first time ever, we're seeing it I 2 I.
:''[The scene cuts to Pete's RV. PJ is scrubbing the floor in front of the TV and sees Max]''
:'''PJ''': He did it!
:''[Pete comes up behind PJ, sees Max and Goofy and spits the beer he was drinking on the screen. He stares at the TV with his jaw dropped. The scene cuts back to Stacey's party. Stacey and Roxanne are trying to do the Perfect Cast. Bobby comes by and sprays them with cheese. Bobby bumps into someone and drops the can. Bobby and Stacey reach the can at the same time and their hands touch. They look at each other and smile. The concert finishes with a bang]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Goofy is just pulling up in the car in front of Roxanne's house. The car is a total wreck. When they stop, the front bumper comes off]''
:'''Goofy''': You're doing the right thing, son.
:'''Max''': Yeah, I know. But she'll probably never talk to me again.
:'''Goofy''': Well, if she doesn't, maybe she's just not the one for you.
:'''Max''': That's what I'm afraid of. ''[goes to the front door and rings the doorbell]'' Uh... hi! Remember me?
:'''Roxanne''': Daddy! ''[opens the door and comes out]'' Max?! I saw you on TV! You were great!
:'''Max''': Yeah? I mean, no, no. I mean, uh... Roxanne, I lied to you. I don't even know Powerline.
:'''Roxanne''': What are you talking about? A billion people saw you dance with him!
:'''Max''': Yeah, well... I-I never met him before. The concert, that is.
:'''Roxanne''': You mean that story about Powerline and your dad? Why would you make up something like that?
:'''Max''': I don't know. I... I guess, I just... wanted you to like me.
:'''Roxanne''': I already liked you, Max. From the very first time I heard you laugh. &quot;Uhyuck!&quot; So... you wanna do something tonight?
:'''Max''': Definitely! Oh! Oh no, I can't. I can't.
:'''Roxanne''': What?
:'''Max''': Well, I'm kinda doing something with my dad. Honest? How about tomorrow?
:'''Roxanne''': ''[extends her hand for Max to shake]'' Deal. ''[Max kisses Roxanne instead. They both giggle and Max lets out a full Goofy laugh. He covers his mouth, but Roxanne just smiles. Back at the car, Goofy has managed to get the front bumper back on the car. He grins and points at it. The car explodes. Goofy is sent flying. With a full Goofy yell, Goofy lands headfirst on the roof of Roxanne's porch. He chuckles and waves at Max and Roxanne]''
:'''Max''': ''[smiles]'' Roxanne, I'd like you to meet my dad.
:'''Goofy''': ''[takes Roxanne's hand and kisses it]'' Enchanté, Mademoiselle.
:''[They all laugh, and the camera rises to the blue sky]''

==Cast==
*[[w:Bill Farmer|Bill Farmer]] - Goofy
*[[w:Jason Marsden|Jason Marsden]] - Max Goof
*[[w:Rob Paulsen|Rob Paulsen]] - P.J. Pete
*[[w:Jim Cummings|Jim Cummings]] - Pete
*[[w:Kellie Martin|Kellie Martin]] - Roxanne
*[[w:Pauly Shore|Pauly Shore]] - Bobby Zimmeruski
*[[w:Wallace Shawn|Wallace Shawn]] - Principal Mazur
*[[w:Tevin Campbell|Tevin Campbell]] - Powerline
*[[w:Pat Buttram|Pat Buttram]] - Possum Park Emcee
*[[Frank Welker]] - Bigfoot

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
*{{imdb title|id=0113198|title=A Goofy Movie}}
{{Authority control}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Goofy Movie, A}}
[[Category:1995 animated films]]
[[Category:1995 American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age comedy films]]
[[Category:Animated coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Films based on television series]]
[[Category:Road comedy films]]
[[Category:Animated films about dogs]]
[[Category:Animated films set in Los Angeles]]
[[Category:Films set in Ohio]]
[[Category:Films directed by Kevin Lima]]
[[Category:Animated films about father–son relationships]]
[[Category:The Walt Disney Company]]</text>
      <sha1>1ku2f5izpxqut5ks0y93gk8r420xbtr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wole Soyinka</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>90358</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965092</id>
      <parentid>3964785</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:47:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Umar2z</username>
        <id>3191517</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */  Added a new Quote #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965092</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="34119" sha1="luyiw9e81dxb8jrqvitug3vtkl8db9t" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Soyinka, Wole (1934).jpg|thumb|right|Wole Soyinka in 2008]]
'''[[w:Wole Soyinka|Akinwande Oluwole Soyinka]]''' (born [[13 July]] [[1934]]) is a [[Nigerian]] playwright, poet, novelist, essayist and pro-[[democracy]] activist. In 1986 he became the first African winner of the [[w:Nobel Prize in Literature|Nobel Prize for Literature]].

==Quotes==
* I said: &quot;A tiger does not proclaim his tigritude, he pounces&quot;.  In other words: a tiger does not stand in the forest and say: &quot;I am a tiger&quot;.  When you pass where the tiger has walked before, you see the skeleton of the [[w:Duiker|duiker]], you know that some tigritude has been emanated there.
** Janheinz Jahn (trans. Oliver Coburn and Ursula Lehrburger) ''A History of Neo-African Literature'' (London: Faber, 1968) pp. 265-6.
** Explaining, in Berlin in 1964, a criticism of the concept of ''[[w:Négritude|négritude]]'' he had made at a conference in Kampala in 1962.

* The man dies in all who keep silent in the face of tyranny.
** ''The Man Died'' (New York: Harper &amp; Row, 1972) p. 13.

* There is only one home to the life of a river-mussel; there is only one home to the life of a tortoise; there is only one shell to the soul of man: there is only one world to the spirit of our race.  If that world leaves its course and smashes on boulders of the great void, whose world will give us shelter?
** ''[[w:Death and the King's Horseman|Death and the King's Horseman]]'' (1975); cited from ''Six Plays'' (London: Methuen, 1984) p. 189.

* [T]he PDP, on whose platform he stands, represents the most harrowing of this nation’s nightmares over and beyond even the horrors of the Abacha regime. If he wishes to be considered on his own merit, now is time for him, as well as others similarly enmeshed, to exercise the moral courage that goes with his repudiation of that party, a dissociation from its past, and a pledge to reverse its menacing future. We shall find him an alternative platform on which to stand, and then have him present his credentials along those of other candidates engaged in forging a credible opposition alliance.
** Sahara Reporters[http://www.saharareporters.com/news-page/crimes-buhari-wole-soyinka]

* &quot;Come January 20, 2017; watch my WOLEXIT&quot; [http://allafrica.com/stories/201612020558.html] [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/nobel-prize-winner-wole-soyinka-donald-trump-throws-away-green-card-a7450141.html]

*England is a cesspit. England is the breeding ground of fundamentalist Muslims. Its social logic is to allow all religions to preach openly. But this is illogic, because none of the other religions preach apocalyptic violence. And yet England allows it. Remember, that country was the breeding ground for communism, too. Karl Marx did all his work in libraries there....We should assemble all those who are pure and cannot abide other faiths, put them all in rockets, and fire them into space.....A virus has attacked the world of sense and sensibility, and it has spread to Nigeria....The assumption of power over life and death then passed to every single [[inconsequential]] Muslim in the world-as if someone had given them a new stature...Al Qaeda is the descendent of this phenomenon. The proselytization of Islam became vigorous after this. People went to Saudi Arabia. Madrassas were established everywhere.
**[[Wole Soyinka]]: Duncan Gardham - [http://thewillnigeria.com/world/3592-Mutallab-Again-Soyinka-Blames-For-Breeding-Terrorists.html Mutallab: Again Soyinka Blames UK For Breeding Terrorists] - TheWill, February 2, 2010&lt;/ref&gt;&lt;ref&gt;James Meikle - [http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/feb/02/soyinka-england-cesspit-islamists England is 'cesspit' breeding Islamists, says Soyinka] - The Guardian, February 2, 2010
* The greatest threat to freedom is the absence of criticism.
**The strong man syndrome [https://www.thecable.ng/wole-soyinka-at-86/amp]

*the contemporary novel . . . I've read one or two: [[Rushdie]], I've enjoyed, again, exceptionally, [[Marquez]], I love his works: that's another exception. [[Bessie Head]]: I found her novels very, very gripping, fascinating, challenging, really intellectually intriguing. Then that black American woman writer, [[Toni Morrison]], the author of Sula, Song of Solomon: she's a fascinating writer. [[Umberto Eco]] . . . But generally I don't read novels.
**in ''Talking with African Writers'' by Jane Wilkinson (1992)
* Well, some people say I'm pessimistic because I recognize the eternal cycle of evil. All I say is, look at the history of mankind right up to this moment and what do you find?
**[https://quotepark.com/authors/wole-soyinka/| Wole Soyinka, Biodun Jeyifo (2001). “Conversations with Wole Soyinka”, p.159, Univ. Press of Mississippi]
* People say human nature is a very vague expression, people tend to say human nature is corruptible anyway and it comes from a theological point of view, goes back to the Garden of Eden, that there is always this corrupt gene waiting to be activated that we inherited from the very beginning. I don't believe in that theological excuse but I know that the sudden oil wealth, easy access to wealth fuelled the process, it definitely accentuated the process, it made corruption easy because if you are corrupt and you have extra cash you are able to shut the mouth of your accuser and they will be silenced.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| saharareporters.com]
* See, even despite pious statements to the contrary, much of the industrialized world has not yet come to terms with the recognition of the fallacy of what I call the strong man syndrome.
** [https://thenet.ng/82-famous-quotes-of-wole-soyinka-as-nobel-laureate-clocks-82/| Famous quotes of wole soyinka]
* As a global citizen, I sometimes feel like denying my identity.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| saharareporters.com]
* I consider the process of gestation just as important as when you're actually sitting down putting words to the paper.
** [https://www.inspiringalley.com/wole-soyinka-quotes/|Wole Soyinka Quotes]
* Alfred Nobel regretted that his invention, dynamite, was converted to degrading use, hence his creation of the Nobel Prize, as the humanist counter to the destructive power of his genius.
** [https://ynaija.com/interview-achebe-was-no-father-of-african-literature-wole-soyinka/| INTERVIEW: Achebe was no father of African literature – Wole Soyinka has all guns blazing (and we mean, blazing!)]
* I know there are writers who get up every morning and sit by their typewriter or word processor or pad of paper and wait to write. I don't function that way. I go through a long period of gestation before I'm even ready to write.
** [https://www.americantheatre.org/1997/01/01/wole-soyinka-art-exile-and-resistance/| Wole Soyinka: Art, Exile and Resistance]
* I can look violence in the face and either reject or accept it.
** [https://www.motherjones.com/media/2006/07/wole-soyinka-interview-running-stand-still/| Wole Soyinka: Running to Stand Still]
* With theatre, you can interpret the most complex play on stage for it have meaning to an audience because you're dealing in images, you're dealing in action, you can use different idioms to interpret and clarify something which is obscured in the reading and of course there are different kinds of play, there are mythological plays, there are what I call the dramatic sketches, direct political theatre which is virtually everybody, but I find that you can use the stage as a social vehicle, you know, which any kind of audience.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize Organization]
* I grew up with a very strong sense of what is just and what is not …
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize Organization]
* But when you're deprived of it for a lengthy period then you value human companionship. But you have to survive and so you devise all kinds of mental exercises and it's amazing.
** [https://www.namibian.com.na/notable-quotes-621/| Notable Quotes]
* As a president, you've got to show some example. I am disturbed for instance when I read that a candidate said, 'I will not probe anybody or something like that'. You don't fight corruption by sweeping everything under the carpet, you don't. You just say, am going to allow the law take its course; I am going to empower the agencies which has been set up for such specific purpose of stemming the corrupt out flow of resources from this nation and don't even talk to me about corruption beyond saying you going to strengthen existing institutions.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| Interview: Jonathan Was Held Hostage While In Office - Wole Soyinka]
* Well, I think the Yoruba gods are truthful. Truthful in the sense that i consider religion and the construct of deities simply an extension of human qualities taken, if you like, to the nth degree. i mistrust gods who become so separated from humanity that enormous crimes can be committed in their names. i prefer gods who can be brought down to earth and judged, if you like.
** [https://unisapressjournals.co.za/index.php/Imbizo/article/view/1854/1383|  Conversations with Wole Soyinka (2001)]
* We wasted a lot of creative energy in that immediate post colonial era, when there was a struggle between, you know, the Cold War between the capitalism and communism. Many writers just wasted their energy and their talent because they want to be ideologically correct and of course all they produced was propaganda.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* I never hesitated, as a student, in embracing the necessity of violence. In South Africa, I didn't just accept it; I looked forward to it as a mission.
** [http://www.motherjones.com/media/2006/07/wole-soyinka-interview-running-stand-still| Wole Soyinka: Running to Stand Still]
* Of course I've enjoyed having the Nobel Prize, the prestige that goes along with it, the money that came with it in particular. I was the typical, still am to some extent, impecunious writer, just struggling to make ends meet, so that, nobody's going to deny that at all. In fact, if they want to give it to me a second time, I'm standing by, ready to receive it, but it's a problem, it's a real problem and then expectations and then you have monsters like Sani Abacha who come up from time to time and who would have died a happy man if he'd succeeded in hanging a Nobel Laureate for literature.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* The media must be used effectively to reach the masses. You have to find a new language in which to address the people and demonstrate what is possible.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| Interview: Jonathan Was Held Hostage While In Office - Wole Soyinka]
* My interest in culture generally is a comparative one, and I think that's where the word joy, I think, can be applicable. There's joy in actually seeing the relatedness, the connectedness of different cultures or recognising, for instance, your own culture in another or another culture in your own culture and feeling an air to all of them.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* My understanding of the creative process is simply that all cultures and all concerns meet at a certain point, the human point in which everything is related to one another. That has been my creative experience.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* I believe that each writer must decide in which language he or she is most comfortable.
** [http://whatsonafrica.org/interview-wole-soyinka-at-80/| Interview: Wole soyinka at 80]

=== ''[[w:The Lion and the Jewel|The Lion and the Jewel]]'' (1959) ===
* Sidi feels empowered by seeing her beauty for the first time in the magazine prints. She recognizes that her beauty is a commodity, allowing her agency to make a future for herself. This is a novel idea: choosing one's own future is reserved for men.

* It is five full months since last / I took a wife 

* The greedy dog! Insatiate camel of a foolish, doting race.
*How often must I tell you, Sidi, that / A grown-up girl must cover up her... / Her... shoulders? I can see quite... quite / A good portion of—that!

*(Lakunle, 2)
*What I boast is known in Lagos, that city / Of magic, in Badagry where Saro women bathe / In gold, even in smaller towns less than / Twelve miles from here...

*(Lakunle, 5)
*Bush-girl you are, bush girl you'll always be; / Uncivilized and primitive—bush-girl!

*(Lakunle, 9)
*My Ruth, my Rachel, Esther, Bathsheba / Thou sum of fabled perfections / From Genesis to Revelations

*(Lakunle, 20)
*Sadiku, I am young and brimming; he is spent. / I am the twinkle of a jewel / But he is the hind-quarters of a lion!

*(Sidi, 23)
*No! I do not envy him! / Just one woman for me!

*(Lakunle, 26)
*To husband his wives surely ought to be / A man's first duties—at all times.

*(Sidi, 47)
*I do not hate progress, only its nature / Which makes all roofs and faces look the same.

*(Baroka, 52)
*Moreover, I will admit, / It solves the problem of her bride-price too. / A man must live or fall by his true / Principles. That, I had sworn, / Never to pay.

*(Lakunle, 61)
*Lakunle, last seen, having freed himself of Sadiku, clearing a space for the young girl.

*(Soyinka, 64)

* Romance is the sweetening of the soul With fragrance offered by the stricken heart.
** [https://quotepark.com/quotes/1181369-wole-soyinka-romance-is-the-sweetening-of-the-soul-with-fragran/|Wole Soyinka, The Lion and the Jewel]

=== ''[[w:A Dance of the Forests|A Dance of the Forests]]'' (1960) ===
* The accumulated heritage—that is what we are celebrating. Mali. Chaka. Songhai. Glory. Empires.
** Part 1, Page 8
* I see we’ve got another of the good old days. Obaneji [on the contrary].
** Rola Part 1, Page 6
* Will you take my case?
** Part 1, Page 3
* When you see a man hurrying, he has got a load on his back. Do you think I live emptily that I will take another's cause for pay or mercy?
** Part 1
* The world is big, but the dead are bigger
** The dead woman, part one
* This whole family business sickens me. Let everybody lead their own lives,&quot;
** Rola, part one
* These rites of the dead. I do not know why you take them on,&quot; 
** Murete, part one
* Aroni has taken control. That is when the guilty become afraid.
** Part one
* Adenebi becomes defensive and says, &quot;Have you no feeling for those who died?&quot;
** Part one
* &quot;Why don't you confess it? You are the type who would rather die in your bed.&quot; 
** Rola,vPart two
* &quot;I have a particular aversion to being mauled by women
** Obanije, part two
* Recognition is the curse I carry with me.
** Obanije, part two
* Doesn't she look like the type that would drive men to madness and self-destruction?
** Obanije, part two
* When your businessmen ruin the lesser ones, do you go crying to them?&quot; 
** Rola part two
* The guests we were sent are slaves and lackeys. They have only come to undermine our strength. To preach to us how ignoble we are.
** Part two
* The descendants of our great forebears...let them symbolize all that is noble in our nation.&quot;
** Adebebi Part two

===''[[w:Kongi's Harvest|Kongi's Harvest]]'' (1965)===
*A King does not become a menial just because he puts down his crown to eat.

*A shilling's vegetable must appease a halfpenny spice.

*The nude shanks of a king is not a sight for children - it will blind them. 

*It was our fathers who said, not I - a crown is a burden when the king visits his favourite's chambers. When the king's wrapper falls off in audience, wise men know he wants to be left alone. 

*It is a mindless clown who dispenses thanks as a fowl scatters meal not caring where it falls. 

*Only a foolish child lets a father prostrate to him. 

*We lift the King's umbrella higher than men but it never pushes the sun in the face.

*The ostrich also sports plumes but I've yet to see that wise bird leave the ground. 

*When the dog hides a bone does he not throw up sand? 

*Age has shrunk the tortoise and the shell is full of air pockets.

*When a squirrel seeks sanctuary up the iroko tree the hunter's chase is ended.

*If the young sapling bends, the old twig if it resists the wind, can only break.

*It's a foolish elder who becomes a creditor, since he must wait until the other world, or outlive his debtors.

===''[[w:The Road (play)|The Road]]'' (1965)===
*You say you get pride and you are still a conductor on a bolekaja.
**[https://www.enotes.com/topics/road-wole-soyinka/quotes Salubi to Samson] 

*Nonsense, we run a bus. The seats face where you are going

*Do you take me for a common gawper after misery?... My bed is among the dead, and when the road rises a victory cry to break my sleep I hurry to a disgruntled swam of souls full of spite for their rejected bodies 

*...There are dangers in the Quest I know, but the Word may be found companion not to life, but Death.

*God rot your coward bones! Do you think not enough people die here that you must come and threaten me with death. You spurious spew. You instrument of mortgage. You unlicensed appendage of the steering wheel...

===''[[w:Madmen and Specialists|Madmen and Specialists]]'' (1970)===
*It’s my life that’s gone into his. I haven’t burrowed so deep to cast good earth onto worthless seeds…. 

*Power comes from bending Nature to your will.

*What is one flesh from another? So I tried it again, just to be sure of myself. It was the first step to power, you understand. Power in its purest sense. The end of inhibitions. The conquest of weakness of your too human flesh with all its sentiment.

=== ''[[w:The Man Died|The Man Died]]'' (1972) ===
* The man dies in all who keep silent in the face of tyranny
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2118407-the-man-died-prison-notes-of-wole-soyinka  The Man Died (New York: Harper &amp; Row, 1972) p. 13.]

* Books and all forms of writing have always been objects of terror to those who seek to suppress truth.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2118407-the-man-died-prison-notes-of-wole-soyinka Soyinka reflects on the power of literature and writing against authoritarian regimes]

*Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't going away
**This quote illustrates the inevitable nature of truth 

* For me, justice is the first condition of humanity.
** Soyinka emphasizes the fundamental importance of justice in society​

* The greatest threat to freedom is the absence of criticism
** This quote highlights the crucial role of criticism in maintaining freedom

* I have always held the view that when you have that situation, you must refuse to be part of it
**This quote speaks to the importance of personal integrity and resistance

* A tiger doesn't proclaim his tigritude, he pounces
** Soyinka uses this analogy to convey the essence of true power and action​.

=== ''[[w:Death and the King's Horseman|Death and the King's Horseman]]'' (1975) ===
* This market is my roost. When I come among the women I am a chicken with a hundred mothers.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Elesin explains why he must go to the marketplace before he travels on to the next world as part of the ritual. Page 10]

* When they get this way there is nothing you can do. It's simply hammering against a brick wall.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Elesin Pilkings offers several ignorant, callous, and patronizing comments about the Nigerians. Page 25]

* You know this business has to be stopped, Simon. And you are the only man who can do it.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Elesin Jane's comment here is telling, for it demonstrates the mantle of authority and power Europeans took upon themselves to order the affairs of their colonial subjects, most of the time without any permission or acceptance. Page 31]

* Is there now a streak of light at the end of the passage, a light I dare not look upon?
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes In the second part of the ritual, following Elesin's consummation of his new marriage, the praise-singer resumes his responsibility of the facilitator of the ritual.]

* Then I slowly realised that your greatest art is the art of survival. But at least have the humility to let others survive in their own way.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Olunde reveals his perspicacity and wisdom, gleaned from living in both England and Nigeria]

* Because he could not bear to let honour fly out of doors, he stopped it with his life. The son has proved the father Elesin, and there is nothing left in your mouth to gnash but infant gums.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Olunde takes on his father's role as the king's horseman and sacrifices himself.]

=== ''[[w:Aké: The Years of Childhood|Aké: The Years of Childhood]]'' (1981) ===
* Things do not always happen as one plans. There are many disappointments in life. There is always the unexpected. You plan carefully, you decide on one step after another, and then...well, that is life. We are not God. So you see, one cannot afford to be weighed down by the unexpected. You will find that only determination will bring one through, sheer determination. And faith in God. Don't ever neglect your prayers....
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/391792-ak-the-years-of-childhood]

* Yes, you know damned well what you should have done if you sincerely desired their surrender. You could have dropped it [the atom bomb] on one of their mountains, even in the sea, anywhere they could see what would happen if they persisted in the war, but you chose instead to drop it on peopled cities. I know you, the white mentality: Japanese, Chinese, Africans, we are all subhuman. You would drop an atom bomb on Abeokuta or any of your colonies if it suited you
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/391792-ak-the-years-of-childhood]

* Wild Christian shushed him, but I saw no difference in both their attitudes. I was overwhelmed by only one fact- there was neither justice nor logic in the world of grown-ups
** [https://www.enotes.com/topics/ake-wole-soyinka/quotes]

* It is time to commence the mental shifts for admittance to yet another irrational world of adults and their discipline
** [https://www.enotes.com/topics/ake-wole-soyinka/quotes]

* Change was impossible to predict. A tempo, a mood would have settled over the house, over guests, relations, casual visitors, poor relations, 'cousins,' strays – all recognized within a tangible pattern of feeling – and then it would happen!
** This quote captures the unpredictability of change in his childhood environment

=== ''[[w:A Play of Giants|A Play of Giants]]'' (1986) ===
* Man is a bird without wings and a tree without roots. 

* The ground that man walks on, has it not always been there?

* We are the giants who bestride the world like a colossus, while others are mere mortals.

* Power is transient, but the deeds of those who wield it can leave an indelible mark on history.

* Ideas, like everything else, can be corrupted. Power is like that: it pollutes everything it touches.

* We must remember that the only true giants are those who walk with the people, not over them.

=== ''[[w:A Dance of the forests|A Dance of the Forests]]'' (1960) ===
* Trouble me no further. The fooleries of beings whom I have fashioned closer to me weary and distress me. Yet I must persist, knowing that nothing is ever altered. My secret is my eternal burden—to pierce the encrustations of soul-deadening habit, and bare the mirror of original nakedness—knowing full well, it is all futility.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* Now what am I thinking of? I must be getting tired. No sensible man burns the house to cook a little yam.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* When your business men ruin the lesser ones, do you go crying to them? I also have no pity for the one who invested foolishly. Investors, that is all they ever were—to me.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* What are you? Men have killed for me. Men have died for me. Have you flints in your eye? Fool, have you never lived?&quot;
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* The totem, my final insult. The final taunt from the human pigs.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* Envy, but not from prowess of his adze.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* My secret is my eternal burden—to pierce the encrustations of soul-deadening habit, and bare the mirror of original nakedness—knowing full well, it is all futility.
** [https://www.enotes.com/topics/dance-forests/quotes#:~:text=My%20secret%20is%20my%20eternal,philosophical%20premise%20of%20the%20play.]

===''[[w:Climate of Fear|Climate of Fear]]'' (2005)===
*For the fire consumes all but the arsonist.

*Today, the constituency of fear has become much broader, far less selective.

*If you believe in democracy, are you not thereby obliged to accept, without discrimination, the fall-outs that come with a democratic choice, even if this means the termination of the democratic process itself?

*Sadly, it is within the religious domain that the phenomenon of rhetorical hysteria takes its most devastating form....

*There is nothing in the least delicate about the slaughter of innocents. We all subscribe to the lofty notions contained in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights but, for some reason, become suddenly coy and selective when it comes to defending what is obviously the most elementary of these rights, which is the right to life. 

*The fault, of course, is not in religion, but in the fanatic of every religion. Fanaticism remains the greatest carrier of the spores of fear, and the rhetoric of religion, with the hysteria it so readily generates, is fast becoming the readiest killing device of contemporary times.

*...the Christian world is not one, neither is the Islamic, nor does their combined authority speak to or for the entire world, but the world of the fanatic IS one and it cuts across all religions, ideologies and vocations. 

*Everyone is linked, all our actions have ramifications, and music is a teacher of this interconnected reality.

*In one form or the other, the quest for human dignity has proved to be one of the most propulsive elements for wars, civil strife and willing sacrifice. Yet the entitlement to dignity, enshrined among the 'human rights', does not aspire to being the most self-evident, essential need for human survival, such as food, or physical health.

*The very least we can live with is an agreement that does not reduce us to slaves of imposition, but makes us partners of consent.

===''[[w:The Strong Breed|The Strong Breed]]''===
*There is peace in being a stranger. 

*But then I am a woman. I have a woman’s longings and weaknesses.

*A village which cannot produce its own carrier contains no men.

*Surely it is too much to ask a man to give up his own soil.
**[https://journals.openedition.org/ces/9132 Oroge's reply to Eman]

*Ours is a strong breed my son. It is only a strong breed that can take this boat to the river year after year and wax stronger on it. I have taken down each year’s evils for over twenty years. I hoped you would follow me.

* No. Let me put it this way, turning anything in my life into something other people can watch, pains me. I assisted them in trying to locate a house in which I hid and operated during the civil war. They were looking for something close to one we were using during that period.
**[https://edition.cnn.com/world/africa/wole-soyinka-interview-the-man-died-spc/ Wole Soyinka responded to how his life experience had been turned into a movie]
#Voice4Africa

== Quotes about Soyinka ==
*My themed reading for both flights was Wole Soyinka, anything I had not yet read by the Nigerian novelist, memoirist, poet, and playwright. Because [[New York City]] was our final destination, I lingered over a poem of his titled &quot;New York, U.S.A,&quot; which had been published more than a decade earlier. &quot;Control was wrested from your pilot's hands,/And yours, mid-Atlantic, hapless voyager./Deafened the engine's last descent/To all but disordered echoes of your feet.&quot;
**[[Edwidge Danticat]] ''Create Dangerously: The Immigrant Artist at Work'' (2010)

*I like a writer like Ngugi, who lashes out, because he knows what is good and bad in writing. And I think this is true of Wole Soyinka, too... I admire Soyinka because I think he's continuous, much more continuous, as a writer…Wole Soyinka deserves the Nobel Prize.
**[[Buchi Emecheta]] In Interviews with Writers of the Post-Colonial World edited by Feroza Jussawalla and Reed Way Dasenbrock (1992)

*What I sensed in Soyinka is that, for the most part, as a middle-aged man he is able to look back on his childhood and still see his early life with that fresh eye. 
**1982 interview in  ''Conversations with [[Nadine Gordimer]] edited by Nancy Topping Bazin and Marilyn Dallman Seymour (1990)

* Now, the most eloquent irreligious individual voice in Nigeria is our first Nobel laureate Wole Soyinka. Soyinka is an eminent literary scholar. He has consistently argued for tolerance and respect for the humanity of all in the face of religious intolerance and extremism. Soyinka has not minced words in condemning the unconscionable religious gladiators in the region that have often turned the country into a theatre of absurdity and holy wars. He has been consistent in his condemnation of the jihadists and crusaders who often orchestrate religious bloodletting in their quest to implement Sharia law or to further some self-styled divine mandate. While I cannot say for sure how impactful his rational appeals are on policies and programs, Soyinka’s statements are sources of hope and light at times of darkness and despair. I can say for certain that on occasions when religious extremists push the nation to the brink. When religion blinds and people are unable to see or think clearly, when fear and fanaticism loom very large, Soyinka is a voice of rational sanity, thoughtful courage, and moderation.
**[[Leo Igwe]], as quoted in ''[https://medium.com/humanist-voices/an-interview-with-leo-igwe-founder-nigerian-humanist-movement-d06300a2ea7e An Interview with Dr. Leo Igwe — Founder, Nigerian Humanist Movement]'' (June 23, 2017), ''[[w:Medium (website)|Medium]]''.

*[[Chinua Achebe]] was a real education for me, a real education. And certainly the plays of Soyinka and ''The Beautyful Ones Are Not Yet Born'' of [[Ayi Kwei Armah]]-those things were at that time real, and they're the kinds of books that one can re-read with enormous discoveries subsequently.
**1986 interview in ''Conversations with [[Toni Morrison]]'' edited by Danille K. Taylor-Guthrie (1994)

* He is remembered in Nigeria with awe, both for a political boldness that landed him in prison and for a commanding intellect that is manifest in every genre he tackles.
** [[John Updike]] ''Hugging the Shore'' (New York: Knopf, 1983) pp. 683-4.

*I consider ''The Road'' a masterpiece. 
**[[Derek Walcott]], 1977 interview collected in ''Conversations with Derek Walcott'' edited by William Baer (1996)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commons category|Wole Soyinka}}

*[http://www.worldcat.org/identities/lccn-n80-38437 Wole Soyinka WorldCat Identities]

*[https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]
*[https://www.gradesaver.com/the-lion-and-the-jewel/study-guide/quotes]
*[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/978.Wole_Soyinka Climate of Fear]
*[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2013/10/quotes-quotes-from-wole-soyinkas-kongis.html?m=1 Kongi's Harvest]
*[https://www.enotes.com/topics/road-wole-soyinka/quotes The Road]
*[https://www.enotes.com/topics/madmen-specialists/quotes Madmen and Specialists]
*[https://journals.openedition.org/ces/9132 The Strong Breed]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Soyinka, Wole}}
[[Category:1934 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Academics from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Poets from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Playwrights from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Essayists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Translators from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Memoirists]]
[[Category:Philosophers]]
[[Category:Political activists]]
[[Category:Prisoners]]
[[Category:Humanists]]
[[Category:Atheists]]
[[Category:Nobel laureates in Literature]]
[[Category:Nobel laureates from Nigeria]]
[[Category:New York University faculty]]

[[uk:Шоїнка Воле]]

== Quotes about Wole Soyinka==
* “Yoruba is a very difficult language. It’s tonal. I wouldn’t recommend it for my favourite scholar at all,” he said. He contrasted Yoruba with Hausa, which he described as less structurally demanding in tonal complexity.
*“Hausa is looser, for instance. I studied language, linguistics and things like that. Hausa is looser than Yoruba,” he added.
*Soyinka also drew a comparison with Igbo, noting that each language carries its own linguistic difficulty.
*“Igbo, I think I would say, is a little bit more tortuous than Yoruba, but nothing compares with the musicality of Yoruba. Yoruba sings, and some people are tone-deaf. It’s not their fault,” he said

*https://punchng.com/yoruba-is-a-difficult-language-for-learners-wole-soyinka/#google_vignette</text>
      <sha1>luyiw9e81dxb8jrqvitug3vtkl8db9t</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965093</id>
      <parentid>3965092</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:51:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Umar2z</username>
        <id>3191517</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */  Added a new Quote #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965093</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="34514" sha1="jfgkz56v1zfp5b3us05no9zl3oxlg50" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Soyinka, Wole (1934).jpg|thumb|right|Wole Soyinka in 2008]]
'''[[w:Wole Soyinka|Akinwande Oluwole Soyinka]]''' (born [[13 July]] [[1934]]) is a [[Nigerian]] playwright, poet, novelist, essayist and pro-[[democracy]] activist. In 1986 he became the first African winner of the [[w:Nobel Prize in Literature|Nobel Prize for Literature]].

==Quotes==
* I said: &quot;A tiger does not proclaim his tigritude, he pounces&quot;.  In other words: a tiger does not stand in the forest and say: &quot;I am a tiger&quot;.  When you pass where the tiger has walked before, you see the skeleton of the [[w:Duiker|duiker]], you know that some tigritude has been emanated there.
** Janheinz Jahn (trans. Oliver Coburn and Ursula Lehrburger) ''A History of Neo-African Literature'' (London: Faber, 1968) pp. 265-6.
** Explaining, in Berlin in 1964, a criticism of the concept of ''[[w:Négritude|négritude]]'' he had made at a conference in Kampala in 1962.

* The man dies in all who keep silent in the face of tyranny.
** ''The Man Died'' (New York: Harper &amp; Row, 1972) p. 13.

* There is only one home to the life of a river-mussel; there is only one home to the life of a tortoise; there is only one shell to the soul of man: there is only one world to the spirit of our race.  If that world leaves its course and smashes on boulders of the great void, whose world will give us shelter?
** ''[[w:Death and the King's Horseman|Death and the King's Horseman]]'' (1975); cited from ''Six Plays'' (London: Methuen, 1984) p. 189.

* [T]he PDP, on whose platform he stands, represents the most harrowing of this nation’s nightmares over and beyond even the horrors of the Abacha regime. If he wishes to be considered on his own merit, now is time for him, as well as others similarly enmeshed, to exercise the moral courage that goes with his repudiation of that party, a dissociation from its past, and a pledge to reverse its menacing future. We shall find him an alternative platform on which to stand, and then have him present his credentials along those of other candidates engaged in forging a credible opposition alliance.
** Sahara Reporters[http://www.saharareporters.com/news-page/crimes-buhari-wole-soyinka]

* &quot;Come January 20, 2017; watch my WOLEXIT&quot; [http://allafrica.com/stories/201612020558.html] [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/nobel-prize-winner-wole-soyinka-donald-trump-throws-away-green-card-a7450141.html]

*England is a cesspit. England is the breeding ground of fundamentalist Muslims. Its social logic is to allow all religions to preach openly. But this is illogic, because none of the other religions preach apocalyptic violence. And yet England allows it. Remember, that country was the breeding ground for communism, too. Karl Marx did all his work in libraries there....We should assemble all those who are pure and cannot abide other faiths, put them all in rockets, and fire them into space.....A virus has attacked the world of sense and sensibility, and it has spread to Nigeria....The assumption of power over life and death then passed to every single [[inconsequential]] Muslim in the world-as if someone had given them a new stature...Al Qaeda is the descendent of this phenomenon. The proselytization of Islam became vigorous after this. People went to Saudi Arabia. Madrassas were established everywhere.
**[[Wole Soyinka]]: Duncan Gardham - [http://thewillnigeria.com/world/3592-Mutallab-Again-Soyinka-Blames-For-Breeding-Terrorists.html Mutallab: Again Soyinka Blames UK For Breeding Terrorists] - TheWill, February 2, 2010&lt;/ref&gt;&lt;ref&gt;James Meikle - [http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/feb/02/soyinka-england-cesspit-islamists England is 'cesspit' breeding Islamists, says Soyinka] - The Guardian, February 2, 2010
* The greatest threat to freedom is the absence of criticism.
**The strong man syndrome [https://www.thecable.ng/wole-soyinka-at-86/amp]

*the contemporary novel . . . I've read one or two: [[Rushdie]], I've enjoyed, again, exceptionally, [[Marquez]], I love his works: that's another exception. [[Bessie Head]]: I found her novels very, very gripping, fascinating, challenging, really intellectually intriguing. Then that black American woman writer, [[Toni Morrison]], the author of Sula, Song of Solomon: she's a fascinating writer. [[Umberto Eco]] . . . But generally I don't read novels.
**in ''Talking with African Writers'' by Jane Wilkinson (1992)
* Well, some people say I'm pessimistic because I recognize the eternal cycle of evil. All I say is, look at the history of mankind right up to this moment and what do you find?
**[https://quotepark.com/authors/wole-soyinka/| Wole Soyinka, Biodun Jeyifo (2001). “Conversations with Wole Soyinka”, p.159, Univ. Press of Mississippi]
* People say human nature is a very vague expression, people tend to say human nature is corruptible anyway and it comes from a theological point of view, goes back to the Garden of Eden, that there is always this corrupt gene waiting to be activated that we inherited from the very beginning. I don't believe in that theological excuse but I know that the sudden oil wealth, easy access to wealth fuelled the process, it definitely accentuated the process, it made corruption easy because if you are corrupt and you have extra cash you are able to shut the mouth of your accuser and they will be silenced.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| saharareporters.com]
* See, even despite pious statements to the contrary, much of the industrialized world has not yet come to terms with the recognition of the fallacy of what I call the strong man syndrome.
** [https://thenet.ng/82-famous-quotes-of-wole-soyinka-as-nobel-laureate-clocks-82/| Famous quotes of wole soyinka]
* As a global citizen, I sometimes feel like denying my identity.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| saharareporters.com]
* I consider the process of gestation just as important as when you're actually sitting down putting words to the paper.
** [https://www.inspiringalley.com/wole-soyinka-quotes/|Wole Soyinka Quotes]
* Alfred Nobel regretted that his invention, dynamite, was converted to degrading use, hence his creation of the Nobel Prize, as the humanist counter to the destructive power of his genius.
** [https://ynaija.com/interview-achebe-was-no-father-of-african-literature-wole-soyinka/| INTERVIEW: Achebe was no father of African literature – Wole Soyinka has all guns blazing (and we mean, blazing!)]
* I know there are writers who get up every morning and sit by their typewriter or word processor or pad of paper and wait to write. I don't function that way. I go through a long period of gestation before I'm even ready to write.
** [https://www.americantheatre.org/1997/01/01/wole-soyinka-art-exile-and-resistance/| Wole Soyinka: Art, Exile and Resistance]
* I can look violence in the face and either reject or accept it.
** [https://www.motherjones.com/media/2006/07/wole-soyinka-interview-running-stand-still/| Wole Soyinka: Running to Stand Still]
* With theatre, you can interpret the most complex play on stage for it have meaning to an audience because you're dealing in images, you're dealing in action, you can use different idioms to interpret and clarify something which is obscured in the reading and of course there are different kinds of play, there are mythological plays, there are what I call the dramatic sketches, direct political theatre which is virtually everybody, but I find that you can use the stage as a social vehicle, you know, which any kind of audience.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize Organization]
* I grew up with a very strong sense of what is just and what is not …
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize Organization]
* But when you're deprived of it for a lengthy period then you value human companionship. But you have to survive and so you devise all kinds of mental exercises and it's amazing.
** [https://www.namibian.com.na/notable-quotes-621/| Notable Quotes]
* As a president, you've got to show some example. I am disturbed for instance when I read that a candidate said, 'I will not probe anybody or something like that'. You don't fight corruption by sweeping everything under the carpet, you don't. You just say, am going to allow the law take its course; I am going to empower the agencies which has been set up for such specific purpose of stemming the corrupt out flow of resources from this nation and don't even talk to me about corruption beyond saying you going to strengthen existing institutions.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| Interview: Jonathan Was Held Hostage While In Office - Wole Soyinka]
* Well, I think the Yoruba gods are truthful. Truthful in the sense that i consider religion and the construct of deities simply an extension of human qualities taken, if you like, to the nth degree. i mistrust gods who become so separated from humanity that enormous crimes can be committed in their names. i prefer gods who can be brought down to earth and judged, if you like.
** [https://unisapressjournals.co.za/index.php/Imbizo/article/view/1854/1383|  Conversations with Wole Soyinka (2001)]
* We wasted a lot of creative energy in that immediate post colonial era, when there was a struggle between, you know, the Cold War between the capitalism and communism. Many writers just wasted their energy and their talent because they want to be ideologically correct and of course all they produced was propaganda.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* I never hesitated, as a student, in embracing the necessity of violence. In South Africa, I didn't just accept it; I looked forward to it as a mission.
** [http://www.motherjones.com/media/2006/07/wole-soyinka-interview-running-stand-still| Wole Soyinka: Running to Stand Still]
* Of course I've enjoyed having the Nobel Prize, the prestige that goes along with it, the money that came with it in particular. I was the typical, still am to some extent, impecunious writer, just struggling to make ends meet, so that, nobody's going to deny that at all. In fact, if they want to give it to me a second time, I'm standing by, ready to receive it, but it's a problem, it's a real problem and then expectations and then you have monsters like Sani Abacha who come up from time to time and who would have died a happy man if he'd succeeded in hanging a Nobel Laureate for literature.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* The media must be used effectively to reach the masses. You have to find a new language in which to address the people and demonstrate what is possible.
** [https://saharareporters.com/2015/08/10/interview-jonathan-was-held-hostage-while-office-wole-soyinka| Interview: Jonathan Was Held Hostage While In Office - Wole Soyinka]
* My interest in culture generally is a comparative one, and I think that's where the word joy, I think, can be applicable. There's joy in actually seeing the relatedness, the connectedness of different cultures or recognising, for instance, your own culture in another or another culture in your own culture and feeling an air to all of them.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* My understanding of the creative process is simply that all cultures and all concerns meet at a certain point, the human point in which everything is related to one another. That has been my creative experience.
** [https://www.nobelprize.org/prizes/literature/1986/soyinka/interview/| Nobel Prize in Literature 1986]
* I believe that each writer must decide in which language he or she is most comfortable.
** [http://whatsonafrica.org/interview-wole-soyinka-at-80/| Interview: Wole soyinka at 80]
* I think the epicentre of terrorism whether you call it cesspit or whatever you want to call it, shift, if you asked me a while ago, I would have said Somalia, Somalia has quietened a bit – and I think the epicentre right now is in Northern Nigeria.
** [https://royalafricansociety.org/interview-toyin-agbetu-director-beauty-is/| Soyinka interviewed by Gateway for Africa editor, Dele Meiji]

=== ''[[w:The Lion and the Jewel|The Lion and the Jewel]]'' (1959) ===
* Sidi feels empowered by seeing her beauty for the first time in the magazine prints. She recognizes that her beauty is a commodity, allowing her agency to make a future for herself. This is a novel idea: choosing one's own future is reserved for men.

* It is five full months since last / I took a wife 

* The greedy dog! Insatiate camel of a foolish, doting race.
*How often must I tell you, Sidi, that / A grown-up girl must cover up her... / Her... shoulders? I can see quite... quite / A good portion of—that!

*(Lakunle, 2)
*What I boast is known in Lagos, that city / Of magic, in Badagry where Saro women bathe / In gold, even in smaller towns less than / Twelve miles from here...

*(Lakunle, 5)
*Bush-girl you are, bush girl you'll always be; / Uncivilized and primitive—bush-girl!

*(Lakunle, 9)
*My Ruth, my Rachel, Esther, Bathsheba / Thou sum of fabled perfections / From Genesis to Revelations

*(Lakunle, 20)
*Sadiku, I am young and brimming; he is spent. / I am the twinkle of a jewel / But he is the hind-quarters of a lion!

*(Sidi, 23)
*No! I do not envy him! / Just one woman for me!

*(Lakunle, 26)
*To husband his wives surely ought to be / A man's first duties—at all times.

*(Sidi, 47)
*I do not hate progress, only its nature / Which makes all roofs and faces look the same.

*(Baroka, 52)
*Moreover, I will admit, / It solves the problem of her bride-price too. / A man must live or fall by his true / Principles. That, I had sworn, / Never to pay.

*(Lakunle, 61)
*Lakunle, last seen, having freed himself of Sadiku, clearing a space for the young girl.

*(Soyinka, 64)

* Romance is the sweetening of the soul With fragrance offered by the stricken heart.
** [https://quotepark.com/quotes/1181369-wole-soyinka-romance-is-the-sweetening-of-the-soul-with-fragran/|Wole Soyinka, The Lion and the Jewel]

=== ''[[w:A Dance of the Forests|A Dance of the Forests]]'' (1960) ===
* The accumulated heritage—that is what we are celebrating. Mali. Chaka. Songhai. Glory. Empires.
** Part 1, Page 8
* I see we’ve got another of the good old days. Obaneji [on the contrary].
** Rola Part 1, Page 6
* Will you take my case?
** Part 1, Page 3
* When you see a man hurrying, he has got a load on his back. Do you think I live emptily that I will take another's cause for pay or mercy?
** Part 1
* The world is big, but the dead are bigger
** The dead woman, part one
* This whole family business sickens me. Let everybody lead their own lives,&quot;
** Rola, part one
* These rites of the dead. I do not know why you take them on,&quot; 
** Murete, part one
* Aroni has taken control. That is when the guilty become afraid.
** Part one
* Adenebi becomes defensive and says, &quot;Have you no feeling for those who died?&quot;
** Part one
* &quot;Why don't you confess it? You are the type who would rather die in your bed.&quot; 
** Rola,vPart two
* &quot;I have a particular aversion to being mauled by women
** Obanije, part two
* Recognition is the curse I carry with me.
** Obanije, part two
* Doesn't she look like the type that would drive men to madness and self-destruction?
** Obanije, part two
* When your businessmen ruin the lesser ones, do you go crying to them?&quot; 
** Rola part two
* The guests we were sent are slaves and lackeys. They have only come to undermine our strength. To preach to us how ignoble we are.
** Part two
* The descendants of our great forebears...let them symbolize all that is noble in our nation.&quot;
** Adebebi Part two

===''[[w:Kongi's Harvest|Kongi's Harvest]]'' (1965)===
*A King does not become a menial just because he puts down his crown to eat.

*A shilling's vegetable must appease a halfpenny spice.

*The nude shanks of a king is not a sight for children - it will blind them. 

*It was our fathers who said, not I - a crown is a burden when the king visits his favourite's chambers. When the king's wrapper falls off in audience, wise men know he wants to be left alone. 

*It is a mindless clown who dispenses thanks as a fowl scatters meal not caring where it falls. 

*Only a foolish child lets a father prostrate to him. 

*We lift the King's umbrella higher than men but it never pushes the sun in the face.

*The ostrich also sports plumes but I've yet to see that wise bird leave the ground. 

*When the dog hides a bone does he not throw up sand? 

*Age has shrunk the tortoise and the shell is full of air pockets.

*When a squirrel seeks sanctuary up the iroko tree the hunter's chase is ended.

*If the young sapling bends, the old twig if it resists the wind, can only break.

*It's a foolish elder who becomes a creditor, since he must wait until the other world, or outlive his debtors.

===''[[w:The Road (play)|The Road]]'' (1965)===
*You say you get pride and you are still a conductor on a bolekaja.
**[https://www.enotes.com/topics/road-wole-soyinka/quotes Salubi to Samson] 

*Nonsense, we run a bus. The seats face where you are going

*Do you take me for a common gawper after misery?... My bed is among the dead, and when the road rises a victory cry to break my sleep I hurry to a disgruntled swam of souls full of spite for their rejected bodies 

*...There are dangers in the Quest I know, but the Word may be found companion not to life, but Death.

*God rot your coward bones! Do you think not enough people die here that you must come and threaten me with death. You spurious spew. You instrument of mortgage. You unlicensed appendage of the steering wheel...

===''[[w:Madmen and Specialists|Madmen and Specialists]]'' (1970)===
*It’s my life that’s gone into his. I haven’t burrowed so deep to cast good earth onto worthless seeds…. 

*Power comes from bending Nature to your will.

*What is one flesh from another? So I tried it again, just to be sure of myself. It was the first step to power, you understand. Power in its purest sense. The end of inhibitions. The conquest of weakness of your too human flesh with all its sentiment.

=== ''[[w:The Man Died|The Man Died]]'' (1972) ===
* The man dies in all who keep silent in the face of tyranny
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2118407-the-man-died-prison-notes-of-wole-soyinka  The Man Died (New York: Harper &amp; Row, 1972) p. 13.]

* Books and all forms of writing have always been objects of terror to those who seek to suppress truth.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2118407-the-man-died-prison-notes-of-wole-soyinka Soyinka reflects on the power of literature and writing against authoritarian regimes]

*Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't going away
**This quote illustrates the inevitable nature of truth 

* For me, justice is the first condition of humanity.
** Soyinka emphasizes the fundamental importance of justice in society​

* The greatest threat to freedom is the absence of criticism
** This quote highlights the crucial role of criticism in maintaining freedom

* I have always held the view that when you have that situation, you must refuse to be part of it
**This quote speaks to the importance of personal integrity and resistance

* A tiger doesn't proclaim his tigritude, he pounces
** Soyinka uses this analogy to convey the essence of true power and action​.

=== ''[[w:Death and the King's Horseman|Death and the King's Horseman]]'' (1975) ===
* This market is my roost. When I come among the women I am a chicken with a hundred mothers.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Elesin explains why he must go to the marketplace before he travels on to the next world as part of the ritual. Page 10]

* When they get this way there is nothing you can do. It's simply hammering against a brick wall.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Elesin Pilkings offers several ignorant, callous, and patronizing comments about the Nigerians. Page 25]

* You know this business has to be stopped, Simon. And you are the only man who can do it.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Elesin Jane's comment here is telling, for it demonstrates the mantle of authority and power Europeans took upon themselves to order the affairs of their colonial subjects, most of the time without any permission or acceptance. Page 31]

* Is there now a streak of light at the end of the passage, a light I dare not look upon?
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes In the second part of the ritual, following Elesin's consummation of his new marriage, the praise-singer resumes his responsibility of the facilitator of the ritual.]

* Then I slowly realised that your greatest art is the art of survival. But at least have the humility to let others survive in their own way.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Olunde reveals his perspicacity and wisdom, gleaned from living in both England and Nigeria]

* Because he could not bear to let honour fly out of doors, he stopped it with his life. The son has proved the father Elesin, and there is nothing left in your mouth to gnash but infant gums.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/death-and-the-kings-horseman/study-guide/quotes Olunde takes on his father's role as the king's horseman and sacrifices himself.]

=== ''[[w:Aké: The Years of Childhood|Aké: The Years of Childhood]]'' (1981) ===
* Things do not always happen as one plans. There are many disappointments in life. There is always the unexpected. You plan carefully, you decide on one step after another, and then...well, that is life. We are not God. So you see, one cannot afford to be weighed down by the unexpected. You will find that only determination will bring one through, sheer determination. And faith in God. Don't ever neglect your prayers....
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/391792-ak-the-years-of-childhood]

* Yes, you know damned well what you should have done if you sincerely desired their surrender. You could have dropped it [the atom bomb] on one of their mountains, even in the sea, anywhere they could see what would happen if they persisted in the war, but you chose instead to drop it on peopled cities. I know you, the white mentality: Japanese, Chinese, Africans, we are all subhuman. You would drop an atom bomb on Abeokuta or any of your colonies if it suited you
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/391792-ak-the-years-of-childhood]

* Wild Christian shushed him, but I saw no difference in both their attitudes. I was overwhelmed by only one fact- there was neither justice nor logic in the world of grown-ups
** [https://www.enotes.com/topics/ake-wole-soyinka/quotes]

* It is time to commence the mental shifts for admittance to yet another irrational world of adults and their discipline
** [https://www.enotes.com/topics/ake-wole-soyinka/quotes]

* Change was impossible to predict. A tempo, a mood would have settled over the house, over guests, relations, casual visitors, poor relations, 'cousins,' strays – all recognized within a tangible pattern of feeling – and then it would happen!
** This quote captures the unpredictability of change in his childhood environment

=== ''[[w:A Play of Giants|A Play of Giants]]'' (1986) ===
* Man is a bird without wings and a tree without roots. 

* The ground that man walks on, has it not always been there?

* We are the giants who bestride the world like a colossus, while others are mere mortals.

* Power is transient, but the deeds of those who wield it can leave an indelible mark on history.

* Ideas, like everything else, can be corrupted. Power is like that: it pollutes everything it touches.

* We must remember that the only true giants are those who walk with the people, not over them.

=== ''[[w:A Dance of the forests|A Dance of the Forests]]'' (1960) ===
* Trouble me no further. The fooleries of beings whom I have fashioned closer to me weary and distress me. Yet I must persist, knowing that nothing is ever altered. My secret is my eternal burden—to pierce the encrustations of soul-deadening habit, and bare the mirror of original nakedness—knowing full well, it is all futility.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* Now what am I thinking of? I must be getting tired. No sensible man burns the house to cook a little yam.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* When your business men ruin the lesser ones, do you go crying to them? I also have no pity for the one who invested foolishly. Investors, that is all they ever were—to me.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* What are you? Men have killed for me. Men have died for me. Have you flints in your eye? Fool, have you never lived?&quot;
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* The totem, my final insult. The final taunt from the human pigs.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* Envy, but not from prowess of his adze.
** [https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]

* My secret is my eternal burden—to pierce the encrustations of soul-deadening habit, and bare the mirror of original nakedness—knowing full well, it is all futility.
** [https://www.enotes.com/topics/dance-forests/quotes#:~:text=My%20secret%20is%20my%20eternal,philosophical%20premise%20of%20the%20play.]

===''[[w:Climate of Fear|Climate of Fear]]'' (2005)===
*For the fire consumes all but the arsonist.

*Today, the constituency of fear has become much broader, far less selective.

*If you believe in democracy, are you not thereby obliged to accept, without discrimination, the fall-outs that come with a democratic choice, even if this means the termination of the democratic process itself?

*Sadly, it is within the religious domain that the phenomenon of rhetorical hysteria takes its most devastating form....

*There is nothing in the least delicate about the slaughter of innocents. We all subscribe to the lofty notions contained in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights but, for some reason, become suddenly coy and selective when it comes to defending what is obviously the most elementary of these rights, which is the right to life. 

*The fault, of course, is not in religion, but in the fanatic of every religion. Fanaticism remains the greatest carrier of the spores of fear, and the rhetoric of religion, with the hysteria it so readily generates, is fast becoming the readiest killing device of contemporary times.

*...the Christian world is not one, neither is the Islamic, nor does their combined authority speak to or for the entire world, but the world of the fanatic IS one and it cuts across all religions, ideologies and vocations. 

*Everyone is linked, all our actions have ramifications, and music is a teacher of this interconnected reality.

*In one form or the other, the quest for human dignity has proved to be one of the most propulsive elements for wars, civil strife and willing sacrifice. Yet the entitlement to dignity, enshrined among the 'human rights', does not aspire to being the most self-evident, essential need for human survival, such as food, or physical health.

*The very least we can live with is an agreement that does not reduce us to slaves of imposition, but makes us partners of consent.

===''[[w:The Strong Breed|The Strong Breed]]''===
*There is peace in being a stranger. 

*But then I am a woman. I have a woman’s longings and weaknesses.

*A village which cannot produce its own carrier contains no men.

*Surely it is too much to ask a man to give up his own soil.
**[https://journals.openedition.org/ces/9132 Oroge's reply to Eman]

*Ours is a strong breed my son. It is only a strong breed that can take this boat to the river year after year and wax stronger on it. I have taken down each year’s evils for over twenty years. I hoped you would follow me.

* No. Let me put it this way, turning anything in my life into something other people can watch, pains me. I assisted them in trying to locate a house in which I hid and operated during the civil war. They were looking for something close to one we were using during that period.
**[https://edition.cnn.com/world/africa/wole-soyinka-interview-the-man-died-spc/ Wole Soyinka responded to how his life experience had been turned into a movie]
#Voice4Africa

== Quotes about Soyinka ==
*My themed reading for both flights was Wole Soyinka, anything I had not yet read by the Nigerian novelist, memoirist, poet, and playwright. Because [[New York City]] was our final destination, I lingered over a poem of his titled &quot;New York, U.S.A,&quot; which had been published more than a decade earlier. &quot;Control was wrested from your pilot's hands,/And yours, mid-Atlantic, hapless voyager./Deafened the engine's last descent/To all but disordered echoes of your feet.&quot;
**[[Edwidge Danticat]] ''Create Dangerously: The Immigrant Artist at Work'' (2010)

*I like a writer like Ngugi, who lashes out, because he knows what is good and bad in writing. And I think this is true of Wole Soyinka, too... I admire Soyinka because I think he's continuous, much more continuous, as a writer…Wole Soyinka deserves the Nobel Prize.
**[[Buchi Emecheta]] In Interviews with Writers of the Post-Colonial World edited by Feroza Jussawalla and Reed Way Dasenbrock (1992)

*What I sensed in Soyinka is that, for the most part, as a middle-aged man he is able to look back on his childhood and still see his early life with that fresh eye. 
**1982 interview in  ''Conversations with [[Nadine Gordimer]] edited by Nancy Topping Bazin and Marilyn Dallman Seymour (1990)

* Now, the most eloquent irreligious individual voice in Nigeria is our first Nobel laureate Wole Soyinka. Soyinka is an eminent literary scholar. He has consistently argued for tolerance and respect for the humanity of all in the face of religious intolerance and extremism. Soyinka has not minced words in condemning the unconscionable religious gladiators in the region that have often turned the country into a theatre of absurdity and holy wars. He has been consistent in his condemnation of the jihadists and crusaders who often orchestrate religious bloodletting in their quest to implement Sharia law or to further some self-styled divine mandate. While I cannot say for sure how impactful his rational appeals are on policies and programs, Soyinka’s statements are sources of hope and light at times of darkness and despair. I can say for certain that on occasions when religious extremists push the nation to the brink. When religion blinds and people are unable to see or think clearly, when fear and fanaticism loom very large, Soyinka is a voice of rational sanity, thoughtful courage, and moderation.
**[[Leo Igwe]], as quoted in ''[https://medium.com/humanist-voices/an-interview-with-leo-igwe-founder-nigerian-humanist-movement-d06300a2ea7e An Interview with Dr. Leo Igwe — Founder, Nigerian Humanist Movement]'' (June 23, 2017), ''[[w:Medium (website)|Medium]]''.

*[[Chinua Achebe]] was a real education for me, a real education. And certainly the plays of Soyinka and ''The Beautyful Ones Are Not Yet Born'' of [[Ayi Kwei Armah]]-those things were at that time real, and they're the kinds of books that one can re-read with enormous discoveries subsequently.
**1986 interview in ''Conversations with [[Toni Morrison]]'' edited by Danille K. Taylor-Guthrie (1994)

* He is remembered in Nigeria with awe, both for a political boldness that landed him in prison and for a commanding intellect that is manifest in every genre he tackles.
** [[John Updike]] ''Hugging the Shore'' (New York: Knopf, 1983) pp. 683-4.

*I consider ''The Road'' a masterpiece. 
**[[Derek Walcott]], 1977 interview collected in ''Conversations with Derek Walcott'' edited by William Baer (1996)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commons category|Wole Soyinka}}

*[http://www.worldcat.org/identities/lccn-n80-38437 Wole Soyinka WorldCat Identities]

*[https://www.gradesaver.com/a-dance-of-the-forests/study-guide/quotes]
*[https://www.gradesaver.com/the-lion-and-the-jewel/study-guide/quotes]
*[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/978.Wole_Soyinka Climate of Fear]
*[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2013/10/quotes-quotes-from-wole-soyinkas-kongis.html?m=1 Kongi's Harvest]
*[https://www.enotes.com/topics/road-wole-soyinka/quotes The Road]
*[https://www.enotes.com/topics/madmen-specialists/quotes Madmen and Specialists]
*[https://journals.openedition.org/ces/9132 The Strong Breed]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Soyinka, Wole}}
[[Category:1934 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Academics from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Poets from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Playwrights from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Essayists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Translators from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Memoirists]]
[[Category:Philosophers]]
[[Category:Political activists]]
[[Category:Prisoners]]
[[Category:Humanists]]
[[Category:Atheists]]
[[Category:Nobel laureates in Literature]]
[[Category:Nobel laureates from Nigeria]]
[[Category:New York University faculty]]

[[uk:Шоїнка Воле]]

== Quotes about Wole Soyinka==
* “Yoruba is a very difficult language. It’s tonal. I wouldn’t recommend it for my favourite scholar at all,” he said. He contrasted Yoruba with Hausa, which he described as less structurally demanding in tonal complexity.
*“Hausa is looser, for instance. I studied language, linguistics and things like that. Hausa is looser than Yoruba,” he added.
*Soyinka also drew a comparison with Igbo, noting that each language carries its own linguistic difficulty.
*“Igbo, I think I would say, is a little bit more tortuous than Yoruba, but nothing compares with the musicality of Yoruba. Yoruba sings, and some people are tone-deaf. It’s not their fault,” he said

*https://punchng.com/yoruba-is-a-difficult-language-for-learners-wole-soyinka/#google_vignette</text>
      <sha1>jfgkz56v1zfp5b3us05no9zl3oxlg50</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>100395</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965172</id>
      <parentid>3963806</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:33:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39962-78</username>
        <id>3350173</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965172</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="40152" sha1="9eqcujw4sm81606pt7db9fsc35xhywk" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Aliceinwonderland-logo.svg|thumb|Alice in Wonderland logo card]]
[[File:Alice in wonderland 1951.jpg|thumb|Alice]]
'''''[[w:Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)|Alice in Wonderland]]''''' is a [[w:1951 in film|1951]] American [[w:animation|animated]] [[w:musical film|musical]] [[w:fantasy film|fantasy]]-[[w:adventure film|adventure film]] produced by [[Walt Disney]]. It is about a young little girl named Alice who follows a white rabbit into a world that is illogical and absurd, but later wishes to go home.

:''Directed by [[w:Clyde Geronimi|Clyde Geronimi]] and [[w:Wilfred Jackson|Wilfred Jackson]]. Written by Milt Banta, Del Connell, William Cottrell, [[w:Joe Grant|Joe Grant]], [[w:Winston Hibler|Winston Hibler]], [[w:Dick Huemer|Dick Huemer]], [[w:Dick Kelsey|Dick Kelsey]], Tom Oreb, [[w:Bill Peet|Bill Peet]], Erdman Penner, Joe Rinaldi, [[w:Ted Sears|Ted Sears]], and John Walbridge. Based on [[w:Lewis Carroll|Lewis Carroll]]'s 1865 novel &quot;[[w:Alice's Adventures in Wonderland|Alice's Adventures in Wonderland]]&quot; and its 1871 sequel &quot;[[w:Through the Looking-Glass|Through the Looking-Glass]]&quot;.''
{{center/s}}''' A world of wonders in One Great Picture''' ([[Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)#Taglines|taglines]]){{center/e}}

==Alice==
* My, what a peculiar place to have a party. You know, Dinah, we really shouldn't be doing this. ''[while crawling through the rabbit hole]'' After all, we've haven't been invited, and curiosity often leads to trouble! ''[As Alice finishes her sentence, she falls down the hole]'' Goodbye, Dinah. Goodbye! ''[while magically floating down the rabbit hole]'' Well! After this, I shall think nothing of falling down stairs. Goodness. What if I should fall right through the center of the Earth... And come out the other side where people walk upside down? But that's silly.
* It would be so nice if something would make sense for a change.
* ''[to the pink flamingo mallet]'' Do you want us ''both'' to lose our heads?!

==The Queen of Hearts==
* That's enough! Off with her head!
* ''[repeated line]'' Off with her head!
* And, what were you saying, my dear?

==Dialogue==
:''[First lines]''
:'''Alice's Sister''': ''[reading from a history book]'' &quot;...Who wanted leaders, and had been of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the Earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him: and even Stigand...&quot; Alice? ''[camera zooms out to show Alice sitting in a tree, playing with Dinah and making a chain of daisies]''
:'''Alice''': Hmm? Oh, I'm listening.
:'''Alice's Sister''': &quot;And even Stigand, the archbishop of Canterbury, agreed to meet with William and offer him the crown. William's conduct at first was moderate.&quot; ''[Alice laughs as her daisy crown falls on her face]'' Alice, will you kindly pay attention to your history lesson?
:'''Alice''': I'm sorry, but how can one possibly pay attention to a book with no pictures in it?
:'''Alice's Sister''': My dear child, there are a great many good books in this world without pictures.
:'''Alice''': In ''this'' world, perhaps, but in my world, the books would be nothing but pictures.
:'''Alice's Sister''': ''Your'' world? Huh! What nonsense. Now, once more, from the beginning.
:'''Alice''': ''[getting inspiration]'' Nonsense? ''[to her cat, Dinah]'' That's it, Dinah. If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrariwise, what it is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? ''[Dinah meows to her, shaking her head]'' In my world, you wouldn't say &quot;meow&quot;. You'd say, &quot;Yes, Miss. Alice&quot;. ''[Dinah meows as Alice picks her up]'' Oh, but you would. You'd be just like people, Dinah. And all the other animals, too. Why, in my world... Cats and rabbits / would reside in fancy little houses, / and be dressed in shoes and hats and trousers. / In a world of my own... / All the flowers / would have very extra special powers. / They would sit and talk to me for hours / when I'm lonely in a world of my own. / There'd be new birds, / lots of nice and friendly how-de-do birds. / Everyone would have a dozen bluebirds / within that world of my own. / I could listen to a babbling brook and hear a song that I could understand. / I keep wishing it could be that way / because my world would be a Wonderland.
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_White_Rabbit.png|thumb|I'm late, I'm late.]]
:'''Alice''': ''[Dinah meows to her]'' Oh, Dinah. It's just a rabbit with a waistcoat... and a watch!
:'''The White Rabbit''': Oh, my fur and whiskers! I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!
:'''Alice''': Now, this is curious. What could a rabbit possibly be late for? ''[running after him]'' Please, sir!
:'''The White Rabbit''': I'm late, I'm late. For a very important date. No time to say &quot;hello&quot;. Goodbye. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.
:'''Alice''': It must be awfully important, like a party or something. Mr. Rabbit. Wait!
:'''The White Rabbit''': No, no, no, I'm overdue. I'm really in a stew. No time to say goodbye, hello. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': Curiouser and curiouser.
:''[Alice runs up to the small door by pulling back the little curtains and turns the Doorknob, who starts talking after Alice tries to squeeze the door open]''
:'''The Doorknob''': D'ooooh!
:'''Alice''': Oh! I beg your pardon...
:'''The Doorknob''': Whew. Quite alright, but you did give me quite a turn.
:'''Alice''': You see, I was following...
:'''The Doorknob''': Rather good, what? Doorknob? Turn? ''[laughs]''
:'''Alice''': Please, sir.
:'''The Doorknob''': Since one good turn deserves another, what can I do for you?
:'''Alice''': I'm looking for a white rabbit. So, if you don't mind...
:'''The Doorknob''': Eh? Oh.
:'''Alice''': ''[looking through the Doorknob's keyhole]'' There he is! I simply must get through.
:'''The Doorknob''': Sorry. You're much too big. Simply impassable.
:'''Alice''': You mean &quot;impossible&quot;?
:'''The Doorknob''': No, impassable. Nothing's impossible. Why don't you try the bottle on the table?
:'''Alice''': Table? ''[a table and a small bottle magically appear out of the shadows]'' Oh!
:'''The Doorknob''': Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction.
:'''Alice''': ''[reading the bottle's label]'' '''&quot;Drink Me.&quot;''' ''[uncorks the bottle]'' Hm, better look first. For if one drinks much from a bottle marked &quot;Poison&quot;, it's almost certain to disagree with one sooner or later.
:'''The Doorknob''': Beg your pardon?
:'''Alice''': ''[laughs]'' I was just giving myself some good advice. ''[sighs]'' But... ''[drinks from the bottle]'' Mmm... tastes like, uh... cherry tart. ''[unknowingly shrinks down to the size of the table; takes another sip]'' Custard. ''[shrinks down again, barely holding onto the bottle; takes another drink]'' Pineapple. ''[shrinks down so much, she's now even smaller than the bottle itself and struggling with its weight]'' Roast turkey… ''[finally aware of the potion's effect]'' Goodness! ''[unable to support the bottle any longer, slips and drops it]'' What did I do?!
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[chuckles]'' You almost went out like a candle!
:'''Alice''': ''[runs up to the Doorknob; delighted]'' But look! I'm just the right size!
:''[She's about to open the door, but the Doorknob pulls away]''
:'''The Doorknob''': No use. ''[laughs]'' I forgot to tell you. I'm locked!
:'''Alice''': Oh, no!
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[stops laughing]'' But of course, you've got the key.
:'''Alice''': What key?
:'''The Doorknob''': Now, don't tell me you've left it up there.
:''[A key magically appears on top of the table]''
:'''Alice''': Oh, dear! ''[Alice fails to reach it when she tries to climb up]'' Whatever will I do?
:'''The Doorknob''': Try the box, naturally.
:''[A tiny box magically appears in front of Alice]''
:'''Alice''': Oh. ''[opens the lid, revealing cookies labeled, &quot;Eat Me&quot;; takes one]'' &quot;Eat Me.&quot; All right. But goodness knows what this will do. ''[takes a bite and grows bigger as she hits her head on the ceiling]'' 
:'''Doorknob''': ''[muffled speech]''
:'''Alice''': What did you say?
:'''The Doorknob''': I said a little of that went a long way. ''[laughs]''
:'''Alice''': Well I don't think its so funny. ''[tearing up]''Now...I...I shall never get out! ''[sobbing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Tweedledum_and_Tweedledee.png|thumb|That's logic.]]
:'''Alice''': Mr. Rabbit. Oh, Mr. Rabbit. Oh, dear. I'm sure he came this way. Do you suppose he could be hiding? Hmm. Not here. I wonder... No. I suppose he must have... ''[upon seeing Tweedledee and Tweedledum]'' Why, what peculiar little figures. &quot;Tweedledee,&quot; and &quot;Tweedledum.&quot;
:'''Tweedledum''': ''[honk]'' If you think we're waxworks, you ought to pay, you know.
:'''Tweedledee''': ''[beep]'' Contrariwise, if you think we're alive you ought to speak to us.
:'''Tweedledee and Tweedledum''': That's logic.
:'''Alice''': Well... It's been nice meeting you. Goodbye.
:'''Tweedledee''': You're beginning backwards.
:'''Tweedledum''': The first thing in a visit is to say...
:'''Tweedledee and Tweedledum''': ''[singing together]'' How d'ya do? And shake hands, shake hands, shake hands. How d'ya do? And shake hands and state your name and business. ''[both spoken]'' That's manners!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': ''[after the Walrus and the Carpenter song]'' That was a very sad story.
:'''Tweedledee and Tweedledum''': Aye, but there's a moral to it.
:'''Alice''': Oh, yes, a very good moral, if you happen to be an oyster.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': I wonder who lives here.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Mary Ann? Drat that girl. Where could she have put them? Mary Ann?
:'''Alice''': The rabbit.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Mary Ann? No use, can't wait, I'm awfully late. Oh me, oh my.
:'''Alice''': Excuse me, sir, but I've been trying to...
:'''The White Rabbit''': Why, Mary Ann! What are you doing out here?
:'''Alice''': Mary Ann?
:'''The White Rabbit''': Don't just do something, stand there... Uh... no, no! Go, go! Go get my gloves! I'm late!
:'''Alice''': But late for what? That's just what I...
:'''The White Rabbit''': My gloves! ''[Blows trumpet]'' At once, do you hear!? 
:'''Alice''': Goodness. I suppose I'll be taking orders from Dinah next.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The White Rabbit''': A monster, Dodo, in my house.
:'''Alice''': Dodo?
:'''The White Rabbit''': My poor house.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Steady, old chap. Can't be as bad as all that, you know?
:'''The White Rabbit''': My poor roof and rafters. All my walls... There it is!
:'''Pat the Dodo''': By Jove. Jolly well is, isn't it?
:'''The White Rabbit''': Do something.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Yes, indeed. Extraordinary situation, but...
:'''The White Rabbit''': But what?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': But I have a very simple solution.
:'''Alice''': Thank goodness.
:'''The White Rabbit''':  What is it?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Simply pull it out the chimney.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Go ahead. Pull it out.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Who? Me? Don't be ridiculous. What we need is a lizard with a ladder.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Oh! Bill! Bill, we need a lizard with a ladder. Can you help us?
:'''Bill the Lizard''': At your service, gov'nor.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Bill, my lad. Have you ever been down a chimney?
:'''Bill the Lizard''': Why, gov'nor, I've been down more chimneys...
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Excellent, excellent. Now, just hop down the chimney and pull that monster out of there.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': Righto, gov'nor... Monster? Aaaaah!
:'''Pat the Dodo''': That's better. Bill, my lad, you're passing up a golden opportunity.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': I am?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': You can be famous.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': I can?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Of course. There's a brave lad. In you go, now. Nothing to it, old boy. Simply tie your tail around the monster's neck and drag it out.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': But, guvnor...
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Good luck, Bill.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pat the Dodo''': ''[singing]'' We'll blow the thing there out, we'll smoke the monster out!
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[singing]'' We'll smoke the monster out... ''[realizes what he just sang]'' NO! No-ho! My poor house and furniture!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Caterpillar.png|thumb|Who are you?]]
:'''The Caterpillar''': ''[meeting Alice]'' Who are you?
:'''Alice''': I hardly know, sir. I've changed so many times since this morning, you see...
:'''The Caterpillar''': I do not see. Explain yourself.
:'''Alice''': I'm afraid I can't explain myself, sir, because I'm not myself, you know.
:'''The Caterpillar''': I do not know.
:'''Alice''': Well, I can't put it any more clearly, sir, for it isn't clear to me.
:'''The Caterpillar''': You? Who are you?
:'''Alice''': Well, don't you think you should tell me... ''[coughs from the smoke]'' Who, you are first?
:'''The Caterpillar''': Why?
:'''Alice''': Oh, dear, everything is ''so'' confusing.
:'''The Caterpillar''': It is not.
:'''Alice''': Well, it is to me.
:'''The Caterpillar''': Why?
:'''Alice''': Well, I can't remember things like I used to, and...
:'''The Caterpillar''': Recite.
:'''Alice''': Hm? Oh! Oh, yes, sir. Um, how doth the little bumblebee improve each...
:'''The Caterpillar''': Stop. That is not spoken correctically. It goes: &quot;How-&quot; ''[realizes nothing is coming out of his pipe and notices one of his set of hands grasping on the tube, clogging it; he slaps the hands to get it off the pipe; Alice giggles a bit, but the Caterpillar gives Alice a displeasing look]'' &quot;How doth the little crocodile improve his shining tail. And pour the waters of the Nile, on every golden scale. How cheer- ''[shakes a bit. He notices one set of feet teetering on the leaf he's sitting on; he grabs them and puts them back on the leaf with a grumble; Alice giggles again]'' How cheerfully he seems to grin, how neatly spreads his claws. And welcomes little fishes in, with gently smiling jaws. ''[looks at Alice]''
:'''Alice''': Well, I must say, I've never heard it that way before.
:'''The Caterpillar''': I know. I have improved it. ''[blows smoke in Alice's face; she coughs]''
:'''Alice''': Well, if you ask me...
:'''The Caterpillar''': You? '' [scoffs]'' Who are you? ''[Alice coughs as her head is enveloped in smoke. Fed up with the Caterpillar's nonsense, she storms off before stopping to kick a cloud of smoke off her shoe. She turns back to face the Caterpillar and leaves, her head turned up. He notices Alice leaving]'' You there. Little girl, wait! Come back! I have something important to say!
:'''Alice''': Oh dear. I wonder what he wants now... ''[She returns to the Caterpillar, blowing a smoke arrow at a smoke target]'' Well?
:'''The Caterpillar''': Keep your temper.
:'''Alice''': Is that all?
:'''The Caterpillar''': No. Exactly, what is your problem?
:'''Alice''': Well, it's precisely this. I should like to be a little larger, sir.
:'''The Caterpillar''': Why?
:'''Alice''': Well, after all, three inches is such a wretched height, and...
:'''The Caterpillar''': ''[suddenly angry]'' ''I'' am exactly three inches high, '''and it is a very good height, ''indeed!''''' ''[starts smoking his hookah faster and faster until he is enveloped in black smoke]''
:'''Alice''': But I'm not used to it. And you needn't '''shout'''! ''[she blows the cloud away as she says this, showing the Caterpillar's skin, shoes, hands, and hookah laying there]'' Oh, dear.
:'''The Caterpillar''': ''[now a butterfly]'' By the way, I have a few more helpful hints. One side will make you grow taller...
:'''Alice''': One side of what?
:'''The Butterfly''': ...And the other side will make you grow shorter. ''[he flies away]''
:'''Alice''': ''[shouting]'' The other side of what?
:'''The Butterfly''': ''[equally as loud; hostile]'' '''THE MUSHROOM, ''OF COURSE!'''''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Cheshire_Cat.png|thumb|Most everyone's mad here.]]
:'''Alice''': Let's see. Where was I? I wonder which way I ought to go.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[singing] 'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves &lt;br&gt;  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe &lt;br&gt;  All mimsy were the borogroves,&lt;br&gt; And the mome raths outgrabe.''
:'''Alice''': Now, where in the world do you suppose that...?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Lose something?
:'''Alice''': ''[turns around to find just the Cat's smile talking to her]'' Oh! Uh, hehe, no, no, I mean, I was just wondering...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Oh, that's quite alright. One moment please. ''[Two eyes drop down on top of the mouth and play harmonica notes. The full cat form appears]'' Second chorus. ''[singing]'' 'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves &lt;br&gt;  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
:'''Alice''': Why, you're a cat!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': A ''Cheshire'' Cat. ''[starts to disappear]'' All mimsy were the borogroves...
:'''Alice''': Oh, wait! Don't go, please!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[reappears]'' There you are! Third chorus...
:'''Alice''': Oh, no, no. Thank you, but I just wanted to ask which way I ought to go.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Well, that depends on where you ought to get to.
:'''Alice''': Oh, it really doesn't matter, as long as I...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Then it really doesn't matter which way you go. ''[disappears, singing a tune]'' All mimsy were the borogoves, And the momeraths outgrabe. ''[reappears on another tree branch]'' Oh by the way, if you'd really like to know, he went that way.
:'''Alice''': Who did?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': The White Rabbit.
:'''Alice''': He did?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': He did what?
:'''Alice''': He went that way.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Who did?
:'''Alice''': The white rabbit!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': What rabbit?
:'''Alice''': But didn't you just say? I mean- Oh, dear!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Can you stand on your head? However, if I were looking for a white rabbit, I'd ask the Mad Hatter.
:'''Alice''': The Mad Hatter? Oh, no, no, no...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Or, there's the March Hare, in that direction.
:'''Alice''': Oh, thank you. I think I shall visit him...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Of course, he's mad, too.
:'''Alice''': But I don't want to go among mad people!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Oh, you can't help that. Most everyone's mad here. ''[laughs maniacally and begins to disappear]''  You may have noticed that I'm not ''ALL THERE'' myself, ''[laughs creepily as he fades away]''  ''And the mome raths outgrabe!''
:'''Alice''': Goodness. If the people here are like that, I must try not to upset them.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The March Hare and the Mad Hatter''': ''[run over to Alice]'' No room! No room! No room!
:'''Alice''': I thought there was plenty of room.
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, but it's very rude to sit down without being invited.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I'll say it's rude. It's very, very rude indeed.
:'''The Dormouse''': Very, very rude indeed.
:'''Alice''': I'm very sorry. But I did enjoy your singing, and I wonder if you could tell me…
:'''The March Hare''': You enjoyed ''our'' singing?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, what a delightful little child! I'm so excited. We never get compliments. You must have a cup of tea.
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, yes, indeed. The tea. You must have a cup of tea.
:'''Alice''': That would be very nice. I'm sorry I interrupted your birthday party. ''[March Hare offers her a cup of tea]'' Thank you.
:'''The March Hare''': ''[yanks her teacup away]'' Birthday? Ha-ha-ha. My dear child, this is NOT a birthday party!
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Of course not. This is an ''un''birthday party.
:'''Alice''': Unbirthday? Well, I'm sorry, but I don't quite understand.
:'''The March Hare''': It's very simple. Now, 30 days has Septem -No, wait... An unbirthday, if you have a birthday, then, you- ''[laughs]'' She doesn't know what an unbirthday is.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': How silly. I shall elucidate.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': Oh, that was lovely.  
:'''The Mad Hatter''': And now, my dear... You were saying that you would like to see...  Pardon me. You were seeking some information of some kind?
:'''Alice''': Oh, yes. You see, I'm looking for a...
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Clean cup, clean cup. Move down.
:'''Alice''': But I haven't used my cup.
:'''The March Hare''': Clean cup, clean cup, move down, move down. Clean cup, clean cup, move down.
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Mad_Hatter.png|thumb|Would you like more tea?]]
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Would you like a little more tea?
:'''Alice''': Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more.
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, you mean you can't very well take less.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Yes. You can always take more than nothing.
:'''Alice''': But I only meant that...
:'''The Mad Hatter''': And now, my dear... Something seems to be troubling you. Won't you tell us all about it?
:'''The March Hare''': Start at the beginning.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Yes. And when you come to the end... stop. See?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:'''The Dormouse''': ''[Panics but calms down]''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[after they have restrained the Dormouse]'' Ah, thank goodness! Those are the things that upset me!
:'''The March Hare''': See all the trouble you started?
:'''Alice''': But I didn't think...
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, that's just it. If you don't think, then you shouldn't talk.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Clean cup, clean cup. Move down, move down, move down.
:'''Alice''': But I still haven't used...
:'''The March Hare''': Move down, move down, move down, move down.
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_March_Hare.png|thumb|Careful, SHE'S STARK RAVING MAD!]]
:'''The Mad Hatter''': And now, my dear, as you were saying...?
:'''Alice''': Oh, yes. I was sitting on the riverbank with you know who. 
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I do?
:'''Alice''': I mean my C-A-T. 
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Tea?
:'''The March Hare''': Just half a cup, if you don't mind.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': What's the matter, my dear? Don't you care for tea?
:'''Alice''': Why, yes. I'm very fond of tea, but-
:'''The March Hare''': If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation!
:'''Alice''': ''[frustrated]'' Well, I've been trying to ask you-
:'''The March Hare''': I have an excellent idea. Let's change the subject.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:'''Alice''': Riddles? ''[to herself]'' Let me see. Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I beg your pardon?
:'''Alice''': Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[shocked]'' Why is a... WHAT?!
:'''The March Hare''': ''[nervously]'' Careful, SHE'S STARK RAVING MAD!
:'''Alice''': But it's ''your'' silly riddle. ''You'' just said...
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[nervously]'' Easy, don't get excited!
:'''The March Hare''': ''[trying to make peace with Alice]'' How about a nice cup of tea?
:'''Alice''': ''[angrily]'' &quot;Have a nice cup of tea&quot;, indeed! Well, ''I'M'' sorry, but I just ''HAVEN'T'' the time!
:'''The March Hare''': THE TIME! THE TIME! WHO'S GOT THE TIME?
:'''The White Rabbit''': No time, no time, no time! Hello, goodbye, I'm late, I'm late.
:'''Alice''': The White Rabbit!
:'''The White Rabbit''': I'm so late! I'm so very late.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[snatching the White Rabbit's Watch]'' Well, no wonder you're late! Why, this clock is ''EXACTLY'' two days slow!
:'''The White Rabbit''': Two days slow?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Of course you're late! ''[chuckles as he dunks the watch in the tea]'' MY GOODNESS! We'll have to look into this. ''[places a salt shaker over his eye and uses it as a jeweler's eyepiece]'' ''AHA!'' I see what's wrong with it! ''[starts to pry parts out of the watch with a fork]'' Why, this watch is full of wheels!
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[shocked]'' OH, MY POOR WATCH! OH, MY WHEELS AND SPRINGS! But-but-but-but-but-but-
:'''The Mad Hatter''': BUTTER! Of course! It ''NEEDS'' some butter. BUTTER!
:'''The March Hare''': ''[shouts into the White Rabbit's ear]'' ''BUTTER!''
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[confused]'' Butter?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Butter! Oh, thank you! Ha-ha! Yes! That's FINE!
:'''The White Rabbit''': Oh, no, no! No, no! No! You'll get crumbs in it!
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, ''THIS'' is the ''VERY BEST'' butter! ''[throws butter in the White Rabbit's face]'' What are you talking about?
:'''The March Hare''': Tea?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, tea! I never ''THOUGHT'' of tea before! OF COURSE! ''TEA!'' HE-HE-HE!
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''NO!'' ''[shocked]'' NO! ''NOT'' TEA!
:'''The March Hare''': Sugar?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': SUGAR! TWO SPOONS! Yes, ha, ''TWO SPOONS'' thank you, yes! ''[jams the spoons straight into the watch]''
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[shocked]'' Oh please, '''''BE CAREUL!'''''
:'''The March Hare''': ''JAM?''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': JAM! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT JAM! Yes, sure you want. It's nice to see.
:'''The White Rabbit''': No! No! Not jam!
:'''The March Hare''': ''MUSTARD?''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Mustard! Yes... What? ''MUSTARD?!'' Don't let's be silly! ''Lemon'', that's ''different'', there. THAT should do it! Hahaha! ''[watch starts going crazy]'' LOOK AT THAT!
:'''The March Hare''': IT'S GOING MAD!
:'''Alice''': OH, MY GOODNESS!
:'''The White Rabbit''': OH, DEAR!
:'''The March Hare''': IT IS GOING MAD! MAD WATCH!
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I DON'T UNDERSTAND, IT'S THE BEST BUTTER!
:'''The March Hare''': MAD WATCH! ''MAD WATCH! '''MAD WATCH!'''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': OH, LOOK! OH, MY GOODNESS!
:'''The March Hare''': THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO STOP A MAD WATCH! ''[smashes watch with a mallet; scene changes from color to black and white, then color again]''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Two days slow. That's what it is.
:'''The White Rabbit''':  Oh, my watch...
:'''The Mad Hatter''':  It was?
:'''The White Rabbit''': And it was an '''''unbirthday''''' present, too.
:'''The March Hare''': Well, in that case... 
:'''The Mad Hatter and March Hare''': ''[sings both]'' A very merry unbirthday to you!
:'''Alice''':  Mr. Rabbit. Oh, Mr. Rabbit. Now where did he go to? Of all the silly nonsense. This is the stupidest tea party I've ever been to in all my life.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': Oh, dear. Now, I shall never get out. Well, when one's lost, I suppose it's good advice to stay where you are, until someone finds you. But who'd ever think to look for me here? ''[sighs]'' Good advice. If I listened earlier, I wouldn't be here. But that's just the trouble with me. I give myself very good advice. ''[sings]'' But I very seldom follow it. That explains the trouble that I'm always in. Be patient, is very good advice, but the waiting makes me curious. And I'd love the change. Should something strange begin? ''[gets so sad she cannot sing]'' Well... I went along my merry way, and I never stopped to reason. ''[Alice whimpering, the creatures tear up]'' I should've known there'd be a price to pay someday. 
:'''The Chorus''': Someday...
:'''Alice''':Someday...[crying]
:''[The creatures cry]''
:'''The Chorus''': Someday..
:'''Alice''':I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it! ''[sobbing]'' Will I ever learn to do the things I should? ''[Alice continues sobbing as the creatures shed silent tears of sympathy, the creatures disappear as the forest darkens.]''
:'''The Chorus''': Will I ever learn...
:'''Alice''': ''[sobbing continues]''
:''[The forest fades into the darkness, leaving Alice hunched over, still sobbing into her hankie]''
:'''The Chorus''':Learn to do the things I should?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[singing in disappear]'' Hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm / And the mome raths outgrabe
:'''Alice''': Oh, Cheshire Cat, it's you!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Whom did you expect? The white rabbit, perchance?
:'''Alice''': Oh, no, no, no. I'm through with rabbits. I want to go home! ''[blows nose]'' But I can't find my way.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Naturally. That's because you have no way. ''[Ominously]'' All ways here you see, are the ''QUEEN'S'' ways!
:'''Alice''': But I've never met any queen.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': You haven't? You haven't? Oh, but you must! She'll be mad about you, simply mad! ''[chuckles, then rolls over and almost disappears]'' The mome raths outgrabe...
:'''Alice''': Please, please! How can I find her?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Well, some go this way, and some go that way. But as for me, myself, personally, I prefer the short-cut.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': Painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red / We dare to stop or waste a drop / So let the paint be spread / We're painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red / Bum bum bum bum / Oh-h-h-h / Painting the roses red / And many a tear we shed 
:'''The Card Painter''': Because we know
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter''': They'll cease to grow
:'''The Card Painter''': In fact, they'll soon be dead
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter''': Oh!
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': And yet we got ahead / Painting the roses red / Red, red, red, red / Red, red, red, red / Painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red...
:'''Alice''': ''[singing]'' Oh, pardon me, but, Mr. 3 / Why must you paint them red?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': ''[singing]'' Painting the roses red...
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': ''[singing]'' We're painting the roses red. Don't tell the Queen what you have seen or say that's what we said, but we're painting the roses red.
:'''Alice''': Yes, painting the roses red.
:'''The Card Painter''': Not pink!
:'''The Card Painter''': Not green!
:'''Alice''': Not aquamarine!
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': We're painting the roses red!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The White Rabbit''': Her Imperial Highness, Her Grace, Her Excellency, Her Royal Majesty, the Queen of Hearts! ''[The crowd cheers]'' ...And the King.
:'''The Card''': Hooray!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Hmm! Who's been painting my roses red? WHO'S BEEN PAINTING MY ROSES RED? /Who dares to taint / With vulgar paint / The royal flower bed? / For painting my roses red / Someone will lose his head.
:'''The Card Painter''': Oh, no, Your Majesty, please! It's all his fault!
:'''The Card Painter''': Not me, your grace! The Ace, the Ace!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': You?
:'''The Card Painter''': No, Deuce!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': The Deuce, you say?
:'''The Card Painter''': Not me! The 3!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': That's enough! Off with their heads!
:'''The Card Guards''': ''[singing]'' They're going to lose their heads for painting the roses red. It serves them right, they planted white and roses should be red. They're going to lose their heads.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Silence!
:'''Alice''': Oh, please, they were only trying...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': And who is this?
:'''The King of Hearts''': Let me see, my dear. It's certainly not a heart. Do you suppose it's a club?
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Why, it's a little girl.
:'''Alice''': Yes. And I was hoping...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Look up. Speak nicely. And don't twiddle your fingers. Turn out your toes. Curtsy. Open your mouth a little wider. And always say, Yes, Your Majesty.
:'''Alice''': Yes, Your Majesty.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Now, where d'you come from and where are you going?
:'''Alice''': I'm trying to find my way home.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Your way? All ways here are my ways!
:'''Alice''': Yes, I know. But I was just thinking...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Curtsy while you're thinking. It saves time.
:'''Alice''': Yes, Your Majesty. But I was only going to ask...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': I'll ask the questions! Do you play croquet?
:'''Alice''': Yes, Your Majesty.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Then let the game begin!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Off with his head!
:'''The King of Hearts''': Off with his head. Off with his head. By order of the Queen. Uh, you heard what Her Majesty said.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The White Rabbit''': Your Majesty, members of the jury, loyal subjects... and the King... the prisoner at the bar stands accused of enticing Her Majesty, the Queen of Hearts, into a game of croquet, thereby and with malice of forethought, molesting, tormenting, and otherwise annoying our beloved...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Never mind all that! Get to the part where I lose my temper.
:'''The White Rabbit''': ...Thereby causing the Queen to lose her temper.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[to Alice]'' Now, are you ready for your sentence? 
:'''Alice''': Sentence? But there has to be a verdict first...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Sentence first! Verdict afterwards.
:'''Alice''': But that just isn't the way...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[shouting]'' All ways are...!
:'''Alice''': ...Your ways, Your Majesty.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Yes, my child. ''[giggles; yelling]'' OFF WITH HER-! Huh?
:'''The King of Hearts''': Consider, my dear. We called no witnesses. Couldn't we hear... maybe one or two, huh? Maybe...?
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Oh, very well. ''[yelling]'' '''''BUT GET ON WITH IT!'''''
:'''The King of Hearts''': First witness. Herald, call the first witness.
:'''The White Rabbit''': The March Hare.
:'''The King of Hearts''': What do you know about this unfortunate affair?
:'''The March Hare''': Nothing.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Nothing whatever?
:'''The March Hare''': Nothing whatever!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': '''''THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT!''''' Jury, write that down!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[yelling]''  '''''OFF WITH YOUR HAT!''''' 
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, my! ''[takes his hat off which reveals a teapot and teacup; giggles]''
:'''The King of Hearts''': Where were you when this horrible crime was committed?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[pours tea into a cup and drinks tea]'' I was home drinking tea. Today, you know, was my unbirthday.
:'''The King of Hearts''': Why, my dear, today is YOUR unbirthday, too!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': It is?
:'''The March Hare''': It is?
:'''The Card Guards''': IT IS??? ''[Much to Alice's horror]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[after the Queen of Hearts is hit in the head and covered in the tapestry]'' Somebody's head IS GOING TO ROLL FOR THIS! ''[RIP! The Queen's face covered by jam, seeing that Alice must have done this]'' AH-HA!
:'''Alice''': ''[throws away the gavel and jam and stuffs her hands in her apron's pockets, which soon reveals she still has both parts of the mushroom]'' The mushroom! ''[she quickly eats both parts]''
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[yelling]'' '''OFF WITH HER-!''' ''[covers her mouth in shock as Alice is grown to the height of the courtroom]''
:'''Alice''': ''[to the card guards, after she grows to the height of the courtroom]'' Oh, pooh. I'm not afraid of you. Why, you're nothing, but a pack of cards.
:'''The King of Hearts''': ''[reading through a rulebook]'' Rule forty-two: All persons more than a mile high must leave the court immediately!
:'''Alice''': I am not a mile high! And I’m not leaving.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[nervously]'' Sorry. Rule forty-two, you know.
:'''Alice''': Now, as for you, Your ''Majesty''. ''[unaware that she is shrinking quickly]'' Or Your Majesty, indeed. Why, you're not a queen. Why, you're just a fat, pompous, bad-tempered old tyrant. ''[finally realizes she has shrunk down]''
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[laughs evilly]'' And, what were you saying, my dear?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[appears suddenly, much to Alice's horror]'' Well, she simply said that you're a fat, pompous, bad-tempered old tyrant! ''[disappears laughing]''
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[yelling]'' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''OFF WITH HER HEAD!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''The King of Hearts''': ''[uses his crown as a megaphone]'' You heard what Her Majesty said. Off with her head.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[spotting Alice]'' There she goes. Don't let her get away. Off with her head!
:''[Alice reaches the door to escape from the mob]''
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[tries to open the door]'' D'oh! I'm still locked, you know!
:'''Alice''': ''[in horror]'' But the Queen! I simply must get out!
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[chuckles]'' But you are outside.
:'''Alice''': ''[releases her grip on the Doorknob]'' What?
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[opens his mouth]'' See for yourself. ''[Alice sees through his mouth and sees herself asleep with Dinah also sleeping on her lap by a tree in a beautiful meadow]''
:'''Alice''': Why, that's me! I'm asleep!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[shouting from a distance, advancing toward Alice along with a mob of other Wonderland characters]'' Don't let her get away! Off with her head!
:'''Alice''': ''[in terror, through the Doorknob's mouth]'' Alice, wake up! Please, wake up, Alice!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[The mob comes closer; last words before her defeat]'' Off with her head!
:'''Alice''': Alice! Please, wake up, Alice! ''[as the mob draws nearer, the screen goes into swirling multicolor until it shows Alice trying to push the mob away before sleeping by the tree]''
:'''Alice''': ''[voiceover]'' Alice! Alice! Alice!
:'''Alice's Sister''': ''[changes to her sister's]'' Alice! Alice! Will you kindly pay attention and recite your lesson?
:'''Alice''': ''[waking up after escaping the mob]'' Hm? Oh! Oh, uh, how doth the little crocodile improve each shining tail and pour the waters of the--
:'''Alice's Sister''': Alice, what are you talking about?
:'''Alice''': Oh, I'm sorry. But you see, the Caterpillar said--
:'''Alice's Sister''': Caterpillar? Oh, for goodness sakes. Alice, I... Oh, well. Come along, it's time for tea.

== Taglines ==
* A world of wonders in One Great Picture

== About ''Alice in Wonderland'' ==
* No story in English literature has intrigued me more than Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland. It fascinated me the first time I read it as a schoolboy and as soon as I possibly could after I started making animated cartoons, I acquired the film rights to it. People in his period had no time to waste on triviality, yet Carroll with his nonsense and fantasy furnished a balance between seriousness and enjoyment which everybody needed then and still needs today.
:* [[Walt Disney]] ''American Weekly'' (1946)

==Cast==
* [[w:Kathryn Beaumont|Kathryn Beaumont]] - Alice (voice)
* [[Ed Wynn]] - Mad Hatter (voice)
* [[w:Richard Haydn|Richard Haydn]] - Caterpillar (voice)
* [[w:Sterling Holloway|Sterling Holloway]] - Cheshire Cat (voice)
* [[w:Jerry Colonna (entertainer)|Jerry Colonna]] - March Hare (voice)
* [[w:Verna Felton|Verna Felton]] - Queen of Hearts (voice)
* [[Bill Thompson]] - White Rabbit (voice)
* [[Bill Thompson]] - Pat the Dodo (voice)
* [[w:Heather Angel (actress)|Heather Angel]] - Alice's Sister (voice)
* [[w:Joseph Kearns|Joseph Kearns]] - Doorknob (voice)
* [[w:Larry Grey|Larry Grey]] - Bill the Lizard (voice)
* [[w:J. Pat O'Malley|J. Pat O'Malley]] - Tweedledee and Tweedledum (voice)
* [[w:J. Pat O'Malley|J. Pat O'Malley]] - Walrus and Carpenter (voice)
* [[w:Jimmy MacDoanld (sounds effect artist)|James MacDonald]] - Dormouse (voice) 
* [[w:Dink Trout|Dink Trout]] - King of Hearts (voice)
* [[w:Clarence Nash|Clarence Nash]] - Dinah (voice)

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline|Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)|''Alice in Wonderland'' (1951 film)}}
* {{commonscat-inline|Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)|''Alice in Wonderland'' (1951 film)}}
* {{IMDb title|0043274|Alice in Wonderland}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:1951 animated films]] [[Category:1951 American animated films]]
[[Category:1950s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Films based on Alice in Wonderland]]
[[Category:Films about children]]
[[Category:Animated films about rabbits and hares]]
[[Category:Films about lizards]]
[[Category:The Walt Disney Company]]
[[Category:Films about size change]]
[[Category:Films directed by Clyde Geronimi]]</text>
      <sha1>9eqcujw4sm81606pt7db9fsc35xhywk</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965242</id>
      <parentid>3965172</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:38:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965242</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="40236" sha1="3ccrnwabw3rurdk983zxyble04rflmi" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Aliceinwonderland-logo.svg|thumb|Alice in Wonderland logo card]]
[[File:Alice in wonderland 1951.jpg|thumb|Alice]]
'''''[[w:Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)|Alice in Wonderland]]''''' is a [[w:1951 in film|1951]] American [[w:animation|animated]] [[w:musical film|musical]] [[w:fantasy film|fantasy]]-[[w:adventure film|adventure film]] produced by [[Walt Disney]]. It is about a young little girl named Alice who follows a white rabbit into a world that is illogical and absurd, but later wishes to go home.

:''Directed by [[w:Clyde Geronimi|Clyde Geronimi]] and [[w:Wilfred Jackson|Wilfred Jackson]]. Written by Milt Banta, Del Connell, William Cottrell, [[w:Joe Grant|Joe Grant]], [[w:Winston Hibler|Winston Hibler]], [[w:Dick Huemer|Dick Huemer]], [[w:Dick Kelsey|Dick Kelsey]], Tom Oreb, [[w:Bill Peet|Bill Peet]], Erdman Penner, Joe Rinaldi, [[w:Ted Sears|Ted Sears]], and John Walbridge. Based on [[w:Lewis Carroll|Lewis Carroll]]'s 1865 novel &quot;[[w:Alice's Adventures in Wonderland|Alice's Adventures in Wonderland]]&quot; and its 1871 sequel &quot;[[w:Through the Looking-Glass|Through the Looking-Glass]]&quot;.''
{{center/s}}''' A world of wonders in One Great Picture''' ([[Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)#Taglines|taglines]]){{center/e}}

==Alice==
* My, what a peculiar place to have a party. You know, Dinah, we really shouldn't be doing this. ''[while crawling through the rabbit hole]'' After all, we've haven't been invited, and curiosity often leads to trouble! ''[As Alice finishes her sentence, she falls down the hole]'' Goodbye, Dinah. Goodbye! ''[while magically floating down the rabbit hole]'' Well! After this, I shall think nothing of falling down stairs. Goodness. What if I should fall right through the center of the Earth... And come out the other side where people walk upside down? But that's silly.
* It would be so nice if something would make sense for a change.
* ''[to the pink flamingo mallet]'' Do you want us ''both'' to lose our heads?!

==The Queen of Hearts==
* That's enough! Off with her head!
* ''[repeated line]'' Off with her head!
* And, what were you saying, my dear?

==Dialogue==
:''[First lines]''
:'''Alice's Sister''': ''[reading from a history book]'' &quot;...Who wanted leaders, and had been of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the Earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him: and even Stigand...&quot; Alice? ''[camera zooms out to show Alice sitting in a tree, playing with Dinah and making a chain of daisies]''
:'''Alice''': Hmm? Oh, I'm listening.
:'''Alice's Sister''': &quot;And even Stigand, the archbishop of Canterbury, agreed to meet with William and offer him the crown. William's conduct at first was moderate.&quot; ''[Alice laughs as her daisy crown falls on her face]'' Alice, will you kindly pay attention to your history lesson?
:'''Alice''': I'm sorry, but how can one possibly pay attention to a book with no pictures in it?
:'''Alice's Sister''': My dear child, there are a great many good books in this world without pictures.
:'''Alice''': In ''this'' world, perhaps, but in my world, the books would be nothing but pictures.
:'''Alice's Sister''': ''Your'' world? Huh! What nonsense. Now, once more, from the beginning.
:'''Alice''': ''[getting inspiration]'' Nonsense? ''[to her cat, Dinah]'' That's it, Dinah. If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrariwise, what it is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? ''[Dinah meows to her, shaking her head]'' In my world, you wouldn't say &quot;meow&quot;. You'd say, &quot;Yes, Miss. Alice&quot;. ''[Dinah meows as Alice picks her up]'' Oh, but you would. You'd be just like people, Dinah. And all the other animals, too. Why, in my world... Cats and rabbits / would reside in fancy little houses, / and be dressed in shoes and hats and trousers. / In a world of my own... / All the flowers / would have very extra special powers. / They would sit and talk to me for hours / when I'm lonely in a world of my own. / There'd be new birds, / lots of nice and friendly how-de-do birds. / Everyone would have a dozen bluebirds / within that world of my own. / I could listen to a babbling brook and hear a song that I could understand. / I keep wishing it could be that way / because my world would be a Wonderland.
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_White_Rabbit.png|thumb|I'm late, I'm late.]]
:'''Alice''': ''[Dinah meows to her]'' Oh, Dinah. It's just a rabbit with a waistcoat... and a watch!
:'''The White Rabbit''': Oh, my fur and whiskers! I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!
:'''Alice''': Now, this is curious. What could a rabbit possibly be late for? ''[running after him]'' Please, sir!
:'''The White Rabbit''': I'm late, I'm late. For a very important date. No time to say &quot;hello&quot;. Goodbye. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.
:'''Alice''': It must be awfully important, like a party or something. Mr. Rabbit. Wait!
:'''The White Rabbit''': No, no, no, I'm overdue. I'm really in a stew. No time to say goodbye, hello. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': Curiouser and curiouser.
:''[Alice runs up to the small door by pulling back the little curtains and turns the Doorknob, who starts talking after Alice tries to squeeze the door open]''
:'''The Doorknob''': D'ooooh!
:'''Alice''': Oh! I beg your pardon...
:'''The Doorknob''': Whew. Quite alright, but you did give me quite a turn.
:'''Alice''': You see, I was following...
:'''The Doorknob''': Rather good, what? Doorknob? Turn? ''[laughs]''
:'''Alice''': Please, sir.
:'''The Doorknob''': Since one good turn deserves another, what can I do for you?
:'''Alice''': I'm looking for a white rabbit. So, if you don't mind...
:'''The Doorknob''': Eh? Oh.
:'''Alice''': ''[looking through the Doorknob's keyhole]'' There he is! I simply must get through.
:'''The Doorknob''': Sorry. You're much too big. Simply impassable.
:'''Alice''': You mean &quot;impossible&quot;?
:'''The Doorknob''': No, impassable. Nothing's impossible. Why don't you try the bottle on the table?
:'''Alice''': Table? ''[a table and a small bottle magically appear out of the shadows]'' Oh!
:'''The Doorknob''': Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction.
:'''Alice''': ''[reading the bottle's label]'' '''&quot;Drink Me.&quot;''' ''[uncorks the bottle]'' Hm, better look first. For if one drinks much from a bottle marked &quot;Poison&quot;, it's almost certain to disagree with one sooner or later.
:'''The Doorknob''': Beg your pardon?
:'''Alice''': ''[laughs]'' I was just giving myself some good advice. ''[sighs]'' But... ''[drinks from the bottle]'' Mmm... tastes like, uh... cherry tart. ''[unknowingly shrinks down to the size of the table; takes another sip]'' Custard. ''[shrinks down again, barely holding onto the bottle; takes another drink]'' Pineapple. ''[shrinks down so much, she's now even smaller than the bottle itself and struggling with its weight]'' Roast turkey… ''[finally aware of the potion's effect]'' Goodness! ''[unable to support the bottle any longer, slips and drops it]'' What did I do?!
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[chuckles]'' You almost went out like a candle!
:'''Alice''': ''[runs up to the Doorknob; delighted]'' But look! I'm just the right size!
:''[She's about to open the door, but the Doorknob pulls away]''
:'''The Doorknob''': No use. ''[laughs]'' I forgot to tell you. I'm locked!
:'''Alice''': Oh, no!
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[stops laughing]'' But of course, you've got the key.
:'''Alice''': What key?
:'''The Doorknob''': Now, don't tell me you've left it up there.
:''[A key magically appears on top of the table]''
:'''Alice''': Oh, dear! ''[Alice fails to reach it when she tries to climb up]'' Whatever will I do?
:'''The Doorknob''': Try the box, naturally.
:''[A tiny box magically appears in front of Alice]''
:'''Alice''': Oh. ''[opens the lid, revealing cookies labeled, &quot;Eat Me&quot;; takes one]'' &quot;Eat Me.&quot; All right. But goodness knows what this will do. ''[takes a bite and grows bigger as she hits her head on the ceiling]'' 
:'''Doorknob''': ''[muffled speech]''
:'''Alice''': What did you say?
:'''The Doorknob''': I said a little of that went a long way. ''[laughs]''
:'''Alice''': Well I don't think its so funny. ''[tearing up]''Now...I...I shall never get out! ''[sobbing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Tweedledum_and_Tweedledee.png|thumb|That's logic.]]
:'''Alice''': Mr. Rabbit. Oh, Mr. Rabbit. Oh, dear. I'm sure he came this way. Do you suppose he could be hiding? Hmm. Not here. I wonder... No. I suppose he must have... ''[upon seeing Tweedledee and Tweedledum]'' Why, what peculiar little figures. &quot;Tweedledee,&quot; and &quot;Tweedledum.&quot;
:'''Tweedledum''': ''[honk]'' If you think we're waxworks, you ought to pay, you know.
:'''Tweedledee''': ''[beep]'' Contrariwise, if you think we're alive you ought to speak to us.
:'''Tweedledee and Tweedledum''': That's logic.
:'''Alice''': Well... It's been nice meeting you. Goodbye.
:'''Tweedledee''': You're beginning backwards.
:'''Tweedledum''': The first thing in a visit is to say...
:'''Tweedledee and Tweedledum''': ''[singing together]'' How d'ya do? And shake hands, shake hands, shake hands. How d'ya do? And shake hands and state your name and business. ''[both spoken]'' That's manners!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': ''[after the Walrus and the Carpenter song]'' That was a very sad story.
:'''Tweedledee and Tweedledum''': Aye, but there's a moral to it.
:'''Alice''': Oh, yes, a very good moral, if you happen to be an oyster.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': I wonder who lives here.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Mary Ann? Drat that girl. Where could she have put them? Mary Ann?
:'''Alice''': The rabbit.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Mary Ann? No use, can't wait, I'm awfully late. Oh me, oh my.
:'''Alice''': Excuse me, sir, but I've been trying to...
:'''The White Rabbit''': Why, Mary Ann! What are you doing out here?
:'''Alice''': Mary Ann?
:'''The White Rabbit''': Don't just do something, stand there... Uh... no, no! Go, go! Go get my gloves! I'm late!
:'''Alice''': But late for what? That's just what I...
:'''The White Rabbit''': My gloves! ''[Blows trumpet]'' At once, do you hear!? 
:'''Alice''': Goodness. I suppose I'll be taking orders from Dinah next.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The White Rabbit''': A monster, Dodo, in my house.
:'''Alice''': Dodo?
:'''The White Rabbit''': My poor house.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Steady, old chap. Can't be as bad as all that, you know?
:'''The White Rabbit''': My poor roof and rafters. All my walls... There it is!
:'''Pat the Dodo''': By Jove. Jolly well is, isn't it?
:'''The White Rabbit''': Do something.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Yes, indeed. Extraordinary situation, but...
:'''The White Rabbit''': But what?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': But I have a very simple solution.
:'''Alice''': Thank goodness.
:'''The White Rabbit''':  What is it?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Simply pull it out the chimney.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Go ahead. Pull it out.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Who? Me? Don't be ridiculous. What we need is a lizard with a ladder.
:'''The White Rabbit''': Oh! Bill! Bill, we need a lizard with a ladder. Can you help us?
:'''Bill the Lizard''': At your service, gov'nor.
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Bill, my lad. Have you ever been down a chimney?
:'''Bill the Lizard''': Why, gov'nor, I've been down more chimneys...
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Excellent, excellent. Now, just hop down the chimney and pull that monster out of there.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': Righto, gov'nor... Monster? Aaaaah!
:'''Pat the Dodo''': That's better. Bill, my lad, you're passing up a golden opportunity.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': I am?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': You can be famous.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': I can?
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Of course. There's a brave lad. In you go, now. Nothing to it, old boy. Simply tie your tail around the monster's neck and drag it out.
:'''Bill the Lizard''': But, guvnor...
:'''Pat the Dodo''': Good luck, Bill.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pat the Dodo''': ''[singing]'' We'll blow the thing there out, we'll smoke the monster out!
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[singing]'' We'll smoke the monster out... ''[realizes what he just sang]'' NO! No-ho! My poor house and furniture!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Caterpillar.png|thumb|Who are you?]]
:'''The Caterpillar''': ''[meeting Alice]'' Who are you?
:'''Alice''': I hardly know, sir. I've changed so many times since this morning, you see...
:'''The Caterpillar''': I do not see. Explain yourself.
:'''Alice''': I'm afraid I can't explain myself, sir, because I'm not myself, you know.
:'''The Caterpillar''': I do not know.
:'''Alice''': Well, I can't put it any more clearly, sir, for it isn't clear to me.
:'''The Caterpillar''': You? Who are you?
:'''Alice''': Well, don't you think you should tell me... ''[coughs from the smoke]'' Who, you are first?
:'''The Caterpillar''': Why?
:'''Alice''': Oh, dear, everything is ''so'' confusing.
:'''The Caterpillar''': It is not.
:'''Alice''': Well, it is to me.
:'''The Caterpillar''': Why?
:'''Alice''': Well, I can't remember things like I used to, and...
:'''The Caterpillar''': Recite.
:'''Alice''': Hm? Oh! Oh, yes, sir. Um, how doth the little bumblebee improve each...
:'''The Caterpillar''': Stop. That is not spoken correctically. It goes: &quot;How-&quot; ''[realizes nothing is coming out of his pipe and notices one of his set of hands grasping on the tube, clogging it; he slaps the hands to get it off the pipe; Alice giggles a bit, but the Caterpillar gives Alice a displeasing look]'' &quot;How doth the little crocodile improve his shining tail. And pour the waters of the Nile, on every golden scale. How cheer- ''[shakes a bit. He notices one set of feet teetering on the leaf he's sitting on; he grabs them and puts them back on the leaf with a grumble; Alice giggles again]'' How cheerfully he seems to grin, how neatly spreads his claws. And welcomes little fishes in, with gently smiling jaws. ''[looks at Alice]''
:'''Alice''': Well, I must say, I've never heard it that way before.
:'''The Caterpillar''': I know. I have improved it. ''[blows smoke in Alice's face; she coughs]''
:'''Alice''': Well, if you ask me...
:'''The Caterpillar''': You? '' [scoffs]'' Who are you? ''[Alice coughs as her head is enveloped in smoke. Fed up with the Caterpillar's nonsense, she storms off before stopping to kick a cloud of smoke off her shoe. She turns back to face the Caterpillar and leaves, her head turned up. He notices Alice leaving]'' You there. Little girl, wait! Come back! I have something important to say!
:'''Alice''': Oh dear. I wonder what he wants now... ''[She returns to the Caterpillar, blowing a smoke arrow at a smoke target]'' Well?
:'''The Caterpillar''': Keep your temper.
:'''Alice''': Is that all?
:'''The Caterpillar''': No. Exactly, what is your problem?
:'''Alice''': Well, it's precisely this. I should like to be a little larger, sir.
:'''The Caterpillar''': Why?
:'''Alice''': Well, after all, three inches is such a wretched height, and...
:'''The Caterpillar''': ''[suddenly angry]'' ''I'' am exactly three inches high, '''and it is a very good height, ''indeed!''''' ''[starts smoking his hookah faster and faster until he is enveloped in black smoke]''
:'''Alice''': But I'm not used to it. And you needn't '''shout'''! ''[she blows the cloud away as she says this, showing the Caterpillar's skin, shoes, hands, and hookah laying there]'' Oh, dear.
:'''The Caterpillar''': ''[now a butterfly]'' By the way, I have a few more helpful hints. One side will make you grow taller...
:'''Alice''': One side of what?
:'''The Butterfly''': ...And the other side will make you grow shorter. ''[he flies away]''
:'''Alice''': ''[shouting]'' The other side of what?
:'''The Butterfly''': ''[equally as loud; hostile]'' '''THE MUSHROOM, ''OF COURSE!'''''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Cheshire_Cat.png|thumb|Most everyone's mad here.]]
:'''Alice''': Let's see. Where was I? I wonder which way I ought to go.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[singing] 'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves &lt;br&gt;  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe &lt;br&gt;  All mimsy were the borogroves,&lt;br&gt; And the mome raths outgrabe.''
:'''Alice''': Now, where in the world do you suppose that...?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Lose something?
:'''Alice''': ''[turns around to find just the Cat's smile talking to her]'' Oh! Uh, hehe, no, no, I mean, I was just wondering...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Oh, that's quite alright. One moment please. ''[Two eyes drop down on top of the mouth and play harmonica notes. The full cat form appears]'' Second chorus. ''[singing]'' 'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves &lt;br&gt;  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
:'''Alice''': Why, you're a cat!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': A ''Cheshire'' Cat. ''[starts to disappear]'' All mimsy were the borogroves...
:'''Alice''': Oh, wait! Don't go, please!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[reappears]'' There you are! Third chorus...
:'''Alice''': Oh, no, no. Thank you, but I just wanted to ask which way I ought to go.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Well, that depends on where you ought to get to.
:'''Alice''': Oh, it really doesn't matter, as long as I...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Then it really doesn't matter which way you go. ''[disappears, singing a tune]'' All mimsy were the borogoves, And the momeraths outgrabe. ''[reappears on another tree branch]'' Oh by the way, if you'd really like to know, he went that way.
:'''Alice''': Who did?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': The White Rabbit.
:'''Alice''': He did?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': He did what?
:'''Alice''': He went that way.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Who did?
:'''Alice''': The white rabbit!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': What rabbit?
:'''Alice''': But didn't you just say? I mean- Oh, dear!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Can you stand on your head? However, if I were looking for a white rabbit, I'd ask the Mad Hatter.
:'''Alice''': The Mad Hatter? Oh, no, no, no...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Or, there's the March Hare, in that direction.
:'''Alice''': Oh, thank you. I think I shall visit him...
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Of course, he's mad, too.
:'''Alice''': But I don't want to go among mad people!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Oh, you can't help that. Most everyone's mad here. ''[laughs maniacally and begins to disappear]''  You may have noticed that I'm not ''ALL THERE'' myself, ''[laughs creepily as he fades away]''  ''And the mome raths outgrabe!''
:'''Alice''': Goodness. If the people here are like that, I must try not to upset them.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The March Hare and the Mad Hatter''': ''[run over to Alice]'' No room! No room! No room!
:'''Alice''': I thought there was plenty of room.
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, but it's very rude to sit down without being invited.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I'll say it's rude. It's very, very rude indeed.
:'''The Dormouse''': Very, very rude indeed.
:'''Alice''': I'm very sorry. But I did enjoy your singing, and I wonder if you could tell me…
:'''The March Hare''': You enjoyed ''our'' singing?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, what a delightful little child! I'm so excited. We never get compliments. You must have a cup of tea.
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, yes, indeed. The tea. You must have a cup of tea.
:'''Alice''': That would be very nice. I'm sorry I interrupted your birthday party. ''[March Hare offers her a cup of tea]'' Thank you.
:'''The March Hare''': ''[yanks her teacup away]'' Birthday? Ha-ha-ha. My dear child, this is NOT a birthday party!
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Of course not. This is an ''un''birthday party.
:'''Alice''': Unbirthday? Well, I'm sorry, but I don't quite understand.
:'''The March Hare''': It's very simple. Now, 30 days has Septem -No, wait... An unbirthday, if you have a birthday, then, you- ''[laughs]'' She doesn't know what an unbirthday is.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': How silly. I shall elucidate.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': Oh, that was lovely.  
:'''The Mad Hatter''': And now, my dear... You were saying that you would like to see...  Pardon me. You were seeking some information of some kind?
:'''Alice''': Oh, yes. You see, I'm looking for a...
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Clean cup, clean cup. Move down.
:'''Alice''': But I haven't used my cup.
:'''The March Hare''': Clean cup, clean cup, move down, move down. Clean cup, clean cup, move down.
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_Mad_Hatter.png|thumb|Would you like more tea?]]
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Would you like a little more tea?
:'''Alice''': Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more.
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, you mean you can't very well take less.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Yes. You can always take more than nothing.
:'''Alice''': But I only meant that...
:'''The Mad Hatter''': And now, my dear... Something seems to be troubling you. Won't you tell us all about it?
:'''The March Hare''': Start at the beginning.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Yes. And when you come to the end... stop. See?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:'''The Dormouse''': ''[Panics but calms down]''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[after they have restrained the Dormouse]'' Ah, thank goodness! Those are the things that upset me!
:'''The March Hare''': See all the trouble you started?
:'''Alice''': But I didn't think...
:'''The March Hare''': Ah, that's just it. If you don't think, then you shouldn't talk.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Clean cup, clean cup. Move down, move down, move down.
:'''Alice''': But I still haven't used...
:'''The March Hare''': Move down, move down, move down, move down.
[[File:Alice_in_Wonderland_(1951)_-_March_Hare.png|thumb|Careful, SHE'S STARK RAVING MAD!]]
:'''The Mad Hatter''': And now, my dear, as you were saying...?
:'''Alice''': Oh, yes. I was sitting on the riverbank with you know who. 
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I do?
:'''Alice''': I mean my C-A-T. 
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Tea?
:'''The March Hare''': Just half a cup, if you don't mind.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': What's the matter, my dear? Don't you care for tea?
:'''Alice''': Why, yes. I'm very fond of tea, but-
:'''The March Hare''': If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation!
:'''Alice''': ''[frustrated]'' Well, I've been trying to ask you-
:'''The March Hare''': I have an excellent idea. Let's change the subject.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:'''Alice''': Riddles? ''[to herself]'' Let me see. Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I beg your pardon?
:'''Alice''': Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[shocked]'' Why is a... WHAT?!
:'''The March Hare''': ''[nervously]'' Careful, SHE'S STARK RAVING MAD!
:'''Alice''': But it's ''your'' silly riddle. ''You'' just said...
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[nervously]'' Easy, don't get excited!
:'''The March Hare''': ''[trying to make peace with Alice]'' How about a nice cup of tea?
:'''Alice''': ''[angrily]'' &quot;Have a nice cup of tea&quot;, indeed! Well, ''I'M'' sorry, but I just ''HAVEN'T'' the time!
:'''The March Hare''': THE TIME! THE TIME! WHO'S GOT THE TIME?
:'''The White Rabbit''': No time, no time, no time! Hello, goodbye, I'm late, I'm late.
:'''Alice''': The White Rabbit!
:'''The White Rabbit''': I'm so late! I'm so very late.
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[snatching the White Rabbit's Watch]'' Well, no wonder you're late! Why, this clock is ''EXACTLY'' two days slow!
:'''The White Rabbit''': Two days slow?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Of course you're late! ''[chuckles as he dunks the watch in the tea]'' MY GOODNESS! We'll have to look into this. ''[places a salt shaker over his eye and uses it as a jeweler's eyepiece]'' ''AHA!'' I see what's wrong with it! ''[starts to pry parts out of the watch with a fork]'' Why, this watch is full of wheels!
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[shocked]'' OH, MY POOR WATCH! OH, MY WHEELS AND SPRINGS! But-but-but-but-but-but-
:'''The Mad Hatter''': BUTTER! Of course! It ''NEEDS'' some butter. BUTTER!
:'''The March Hare''': ''[shouts into the White Rabbit's ear]'' ''BUTTER!''
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[confused]'' Butter?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Butter! Oh, thank you! Ha-ha! Yes! That's FINE!
:'''The White Rabbit''': Oh, no, no! No, no! No! You'll get crumbs in it!
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, ''THIS'' is the ''VERY BEST'' butter! ''[throws butter in the White Rabbit's face]'' What are you talking about?
:'''The March Hare''': Tea?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, tea! I never ''THOUGHT'' of tea before! OF COURSE! ''TEA!'' HE-HE-HE!
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''NO!'' ''[shocked]'' NO! ''NOT'' TEA!
:'''The March Hare''': Sugar?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': SUGAR! TWO SPOONS! Yes, ha, ''TWO SPOONS'' thank you, yes! ''[jams the spoons straight into the watch]''
:'''The White Rabbit''': ''[shocked]'' Oh please, '''''BE CAREUL!'''''
:'''The March Hare''': ''JAM?''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': JAM! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT JAM! Yes, sure you want. It's nice to see.
:'''The White Rabbit''': No! No! Not jam!
:'''The March Hare''': ''MUSTARD?''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Mustard! Yes... What? ''MUSTARD?!'' Don't let's be silly! ''Lemon'', that's ''different'', there. THAT should do it! Hahaha! ''[watch starts going crazy]'' LOOK AT THAT!
:'''The March Hare''': IT'S GOING MAD!
:'''Alice''': OH, MY GOODNESS!
:'''The White Rabbit''': OH, DEAR!
:'''The March Hare''': IT IS GOING MAD! MAD WATCH!
:'''The Mad Hatter''': I DON'T UNDERSTAND, IT'S THE BEST BUTTER!
:'''The March Hare''': MAD WATCH! ''MAD WATCH! '''MAD WATCH!'''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': OH, LOOK! OH, MY GOODNESS!
:'''The March Hare''': THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO STOP A MAD WATCH! ''[smashes watch with a mallet; scene changes from color to black and white, then color again]''
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Two days slow. That's what it is.
:'''The White Rabbit''':  Oh, my watch...
:'''The Mad Hatter''':  It was?
:'''The White Rabbit''': And it was an '''''unbirthday''''' present, too.
:'''The March Hare''': Well, in that case... 
:'''The Mad Hatter and March Hare''': ''[sings both]'' A very merry unbirthday to you!
:'''Alice''':  Mr. Rabbit. Oh, Mr. Rabbit. Now where did he go to? Of all the silly nonsense. This is the stupidest tea party I've ever been to in all my life.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': Oh, dear. Now, I shall never get out. Well, when one's lost, I suppose it's good advice to stay where you are, until someone finds you. But who'd ever think to look for me here? ''[sighs]'' Good advice. If I listened earlier, I wouldn't be here. But that's just the trouble with me. I give myself very good advice. ''[sings]'' But I very seldom follow it. That explains the trouble that I'm always in. Be patient, is very good advice, but the waiting makes me curious. And I'd love the change. Should something strange begin? ''[gets so sad she cannot sing]'' Well... I went along my merry way, and I never stopped to reason. ''[Alice whimpering, the creatures tear up]'' I should've known there'd be a price to pay someday. 
:'''The Chorus''': Someday...
:'''Alice''':Someday...[crying]
:''[The creatures cry]''
:'''The Chorus''': Someday..
:'''Alice''':I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it! ''[sobbing]'' Will I ever learn to do the things I should? ''[Alice continues sobbing as the creatures shed silent tears of sympathy, the creatures disappear as the forest darkens.]''
:'''The Chorus''': Will I ever learn...
:'''Alice''': ''[sobbing continues]''
:''[The forest fades into the darkness, leaving Alice hunched over, still sobbing into her hankie]''
:'''The Chorus''':Learn to do the things I should?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[singing in disappear]'' Hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm / And the mome raths outgrabe
:'''Alice''': Oh, Cheshire Cat, it's you!
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Whom did you expect? The white rabbit, perchance?
:'''Alice''': Oh, no, no, no. I'm through with rabbits. I want to go home! ''[blows nose]'' But I can't find my way.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Naturally. That's because you have no way. ''[Ominously]'' All ways here you see, are the ''QUEEN'S'' ways!
:'''Alice''': But I've never met any queen.
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': You haven't? You haven't? Oh, but you must! She'll be mad about you, simply mad! ''[chuckles, then rolls over and almost disappears]'' The mome raths outgrabe...
:'''Alice''': Please, please! How can I find her?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': Well, some go this way, and some go that way. But as for me, myself, personally, I prefer the short-cut.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': Painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red / We dare to stop or waste a drop / So let the paint be spread / We're painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red / Bum bum bum bum / Oh-h-h-h / Painting the roses red / And many a tear we shed 
:'''The Card Painter''': Because we know
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter''': They'll cease to grow
:'''The Card Painter''': In fact, they'll soon be dead
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter''': Oh!
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': And yet we got ahead / Painting the roses red / Red, red, red, red / Red, red, red, red / Painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red...
:'''Alice''': ''[singing]'' Oh, pardon me, but, Mr. 3 / Why must you paint them red?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alice''': ''[singing]'' Painting the roses red...
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': ''[singing]'' We're painting the roses red. Don't tell the Queen what you have seen or say that's what we said, but we're painting the roses red.
:'''Alice''': Yes, painting the roses red.
:'''The Card Painter''': Not pink!
:'''The Card Painter''': Not green!
:'''Alice''': Not aquamarine!
:'''The Card Painter, the Card Painter, the Card Painter''': We're painting the roses red!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The White Rabbit''': Her Imperial Highness, Her Grace, Her Excellency, Her Royal Majesty, the Queen of Hearts! ''[The crowd cheers]'' ...And the King.
:'''The Card''': Hooray!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Hmm! Who's been painting my roses red? WHO'S BEEN PAINTING MY ROSES RED? /Who dares to taint / With vulgar paint / The royal flower bed? / For painting my roses red / Someone will lose his head.
:'''The Card Painter''': Oh, no, Your Majesty, please! It's all his fault!
:'''The Card Painter''': Not me, your grace! The Ace, the Ace!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': You?
:'''The Card Painter''': No, Deuce!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': The Deuce, you say?
:'''The Card Painter''': Not me! The 3!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': That's enough! Off with their heads!
:'''The Card Guards''': ''[singing]'' They're going to lose their heads for painting the roses red. It serves them right, they planted white and roses should be red. They're going to lose their heads.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Silence!
:'''Alice''': Oh, please, they were only trying...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': And who is this?
:'''The King of Hearts''': Let me see, my dear. It's certainly not a heart. Do you suppose it's a club?
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Why, it's a little girl.
:'''Alice''': Yes. And I was hoping...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Look up. Speak nicely. And don't twiddle your fingers. Turn out your toes. Curtsy. Open your mouth a little wider. And always say, Yes, Your Majesty.
:'''Alice''': Yes, Your Majesty.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Now, where d'you come from and where are you going?
:'''Alice''': I'm trying to find my way home.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Your way? All ways here are my ways!
:'''Alice''': Yes, I know. But I was just thinking...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Curtsy while you're thinking. It saves time.
:'''Alice''': Yes, Your Majesty. But I was only going to ask...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': I'll ask the questions! Do you play croquet?
:'''Alice''': Yes, Your Majesty.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Then let the game begin!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Off with his head!
:'''The King of Hearts''': Off with his head. Off with his head. By order of the Queen. Uh, you heard what Her Majesty said.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The White Rabbit''': Your Majesty, members of the jury, loyal subjects... and the King... the prisoner at the bar stands accused of enticing Her Majesty, the Queen of Hearts, into a game of croquet, thereby and with malice of forethought, molesting, tormenting, and otherwise annoying our beloved...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Never mind all that! Get to the part where I lose my temper.
:'''The White Rabbit''': ...Thereby causing the Queen to lose her temper.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[to Alice]'' Now, are you ready for your sentence? 
:'''Alice''': Sentence? But there has to be a verdict first...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Sentence first! Verdict afterwards.
:'''Alice''': But that just isn't the way...
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[shouting]'' All ways are...!
:'''Alice''': ...Your ways, Your Majesty.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Yes, my child. ''[giggles; yelling]'' OFF WITH HER-! Huh?
:'''The King of Hearts''': Consider, my dear. We called no witnesses. Couldn't we hear... maybe one or two, huh? Maybe...?
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Oh, very well. ''[yelling]'' '''''BUT GET ON WITH IT!'''''
:'''The King of Hearts''': First witness. Herald, call the first witness.
:'''The White Rabbit''': The March Hare.
:'''The King of Hearts''': What do you know about this unfortunate affair?
:'''The March Hare''': Nothing.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': Nothing whatever?
:'''The March Hare''': Nothing whatever!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': '''''THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT!''''' Jury, write that down!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[yelling]''  '''''OFF WITH YOUR HAT!''''' 
:'''The Mad Hatter''': Oh, my! ''[takes his hat off which reveals a teapot and teacup; giggles]''
:'''The King of Hearts''': Where were you when this horrible crime was committed?
:'''The Mad Hatter''': ''[pours tea into a cup and drinks tea]'' I was home drinking tea. Today, you know, was my unbirthday.
:'''The King of Hearts''': Why, my dear, today is YOUR unbirthday, too!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': It is?
:'''The March Hare''': It is?
:'''The Card Guards''': IT IS??? ''[Much to Alice's horror]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[after the Queen of Hearts is hit in the head and covered in the tapestry]'' Somebody's head IS GOING TO ROLL FOR THIS! ''[RIP! The Queen's face covered by jam, seeing that Alice must have done this]'' AH-HA!
:'''Alice''': ''[throws away the gavel and jam and stuffs her hands in her apron's pockets, which soon reveals she still has both parts of the mushroom]'' The mushroom! ''[she quickly eats both parts]''
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[yelling]'' '''OFF WITH HER-!''' ''[covers her mouth in shock as Alice is grown to the height of the courtroom]''
:'''Alice''': ''[to the card guards, after she grows to the height of the courtroom]'' Oh, pooh. I'm not afraid of you. Why, you're nothing, but a pack of cards.
:'''The King of Hearts''': ''[reading through a rulebook]'' Rule forty-two: All persons more than a mile high must leave the court immediately!
:'''Alice''': I am not a mile high! And I’m not leaving.
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[nervously]'' Sorry. Rule forty-two, you know.
:'''Alice''': Now, as for you, Your ''Majesty''. ''[unaware that she is shrinking quickly]'' Or Your Majesty, indeed. Why, you're not a queen. Why, you're just a fat, pompous, bad-tempered old tyrant. ''[finally realizes she has shrunk down]''
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[laughs evilly]'' And, what were you saying, my dear?
:'''The Cheshire Cat''': ''[appears suddenly, much to Alice's horror]'' Well, she simply said that you're a fat, pompous, bad-tempered old tyrant! ''[disappears laughing]''
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[yelling]'' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''OFF WITH HER HEAD!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''The King of Hearts''': ''[uses his crown as a megaphone]'' You heard what Her Majesty said. Off with her head.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[spotting Alice]'' There she goes. Don't let her get away. Off with her head!
:''[Alice reaches the door to escape from the mob]''
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[tries to open the door]'' D'oh! I'm still locked, you know!
:'''Alice''': ''[in horror]'' But the Queen! I simply must get out!
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[chuckles]'' But you are outside.
:'''Alice''': ''[releases her grip on the Doorknob]'' What?
:'''The Doorknob''': ''[opens his mouth]'' See for yourself. ''[Alice sees through his mouth and sees herself asleep with Dinah also sleeping on her lap by a tree in a beautiful meadow]''
:'''Alice''': Why, that's me! I'm asleep!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[shouting from a distance, advancing toward Alice along with a mob of other Wonderland characters]'' Don't let her get away! Off with her head!
:'''Alice''': ''[in terror, through the Doorknob's mouth]'' Alice, wake up! Please, wake up, Alice!
:'''The Queen of Hearts''': ''[The mob comes closer; last words before her defeat]'' Off with her head!
:'''Alice''': Alice! Please, wake up, Alice! ''[as the mob draws nearer, the screen goes into swirling multicolor until it shows Alice trying to push the mob away before sleeping by the tree]''
:'''Alice''': ''[voiceover]'' Alice! Alice! Alice!
:'''Alice's Sister''': ''[changes to her sister's]'' Alice! Alice! Will you kindly pay attention and recite your lesson?
:'''Alice''': ''[waking up after escaping the mob]'' Hm? Oh! Oh, uh, how doth the little crocodile improve each shining tail and pour the waters of the--
:'''Alice's Sister''': Alice, what are you talking about?
:'''Alice''': Oh, I'm sorry. But you see, the Caterpillar said--
:'''Alice's Sister''': Caterpillar? Oh, for goodness sakes. Alice, I... Oh, well. Come along, it's time for tea.

== Taglines ==
* A world of wonders in One Great Picture

== About ''Alice in Wonderland'' ==
* No story in English literature has intrigued me more than Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland. It fascinated me the first time I read it as a schoolboy and as soon as I possibly could after I started making animated cartoons, I acquired the film rights to it. People in his period had no time to waste on triviality, yet Carroll with his nonsense and fantasy furnished a balance between seriousness and enjoyment which everybody needed then and still needs today.
:* [[Walt Disney]] ''American Weekly'' (1946)

==Cast==
* [[w:Kathryn Beaumont|Kathryn Beaumont]] - Alice (voice)
* [[Ed Wynn]] - Mad Hatter (voice)
* [[w:Richard Haydn|Richard Haydn]] - Caterpillar (voice)
* [[w:Sterling Holloway|Sterling Holloway]] - Cheshire Cat (voice)
* [[w:Jerry Colonna (entertainer)|Jerry Colonna]] - March Hare (voice)
* [[w:Verna Felton|Verna Felton]] - Queen of Hearts (voice)
* [[Bill Thompson]] - White Rabbit (voice)
* [[Bill Thompson]] - Pat the Dodo (voice)
* [[w:Heather Angel (actress)|Heather Angel]] - Alice's Sister (voice)
* [[w:Joseph Kearns|Joseph Kearns]] - Doorknob (voice)
* [[w:Larry Grey|Larry Grey]] - Bill the Lizard (voice)
* [[w:J. Pat O'Malley|J. Pat O'Malley]] - Tweedledee and Tweedledum (voice)
* [[w:J. Pat O'Malley|J. Pat O'Malley]] - Walrus and Carpenter (voice)
* [[w:Jimmy MacDoanld (sounds effect artist)|James MacDonald]] - Dormouse (voice) 
* [[w:Dink Trout|Dink Trout]] - King of Hearts (voice)
* [[w:Clarence Nash|Clarence Nash]] - Dinah (voice)

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline|Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)|''Alice in Wonderland'' (1951 film)}}
* {{commonscat-inline|Alice in Wonderland (1951 film)|''Alice in Wonderland'' (1951 film)}}
* {{IMDb title|0043274|Alice in Wonderland}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:1951 animated films]]
[[Category:1951 American animated films]]
[[Category:1950s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:Animated coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Films based on Alice in Wonderland]]
[[Category:Films about children]]
[[Category:Animated films about rabbits and hares]]
[[Category:Films about lizards]]
[[Category:The Walt Disney Company]]
[[Category:Films about size change]]
[[Category:Films directed by Clyde Geronimi]]</text>
      <sha1>3ccrnwabw3rurdk983zxyble04rflmi</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Monsters vs. Aliens</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>102952</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965200</id>
      <parentid>3962145</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:36:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39924-89</username>
        <id>3350191</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965200</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42637" sha1="lzxnrb92gg2xnh7x8z0djb3aasl6mce" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Monsters vs. Aliens}}''''' is a 2009 3D computer-animated film produced by [[w:Dreamworks Animation|DreamWorks Animation]] and distributed by [[w:Universal Pictures|Universal Pictures]]. It tells the story of a young inventor named Susan Murphy, who after being hit by a meteorite, is granted super-strength and a near 50-foot height by the foreign element contained within it. She is captured and imprisoned by the government until she and a squad of other imprisoned monsters are called upon to fend off an invading alien attack.

:''Directed by Conrad Vernon and Rob Letterman. Screenplay by Maya Forbes, Wallace Wolodarsky, Rob Letterman, Jonathan Aibel, and Glenn Berger. Story by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon.''

{{center|'''When aliens attack, monsters fight back.''' &lt;small&gt;[[#Taglines|Taglines]]&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Gallaxhar==
* The Omega Quadrant? Lame!
* Extract the Quantonium with extreme prejudice. I want it all. Every last drop!
* Nothing can stand in my way now!
* ''[looking at Susan on a monitor]'' Oh, you think because you're all big and strong, and you can destroy my robot probe, that you're gonna send me running and hiding?! My days of running and hiding are over. Computer set a course to Earth! I will retrieve the Quantonium myself... even if I need to rip it out of her body, one cell at a time!
* ''[Susan tries to escape his forcefield''] Don't bother, that forcefield is impenetrable-- ''[Susan smashes her fist through, nearly hitting Gallaxhar]'' WHAT THE FLAGNOG?!
* ''[telling his life-story; is constantly interrupted by his cloning machine pressing him down]'' Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... No child should ever have to endure that! So I went on the road, with a giant... And soon thereafter was married! Things were going well, until she wanted to... And I was all &quot;No way!&quot;, and she was all &quot;Yes way!&quot;, and I was like... But I've told you too much already!
* Let the birth of my new planet - now called... &quot;Gallaxhar's... Planet&quot; begin!!
* Humans of Earth! I have come in peace. You need not fear me. I mean you no harm. However, it may be important to know that most of you will not survive the next 24 hours. And those of you who do survive will be enslaved and experimented on. You should in no way take any of this personally — it's just business! So, just to recap: I come in peace, I mean you no harm, and you all will die. Gallaxhar out.
* Attention, all aliens! [[Destroy All Monsters|Destroy all monsters]]!
* Uh, Spaceballs! Divert the Quantonium to the bridge, and prepare my escape capsule!
* Attention, robot probes! Crush the earthling!
* Are you crazy?! You could have killed me!
* Like I told you before, you should have defeated me when you had the Quantonium! Have fun exploding!!
* ''[last lines before his death]'' Come on, come on!!!!

== Susan Murphy / Ginormica ==
* ''[as she grows, for the wedding guests flee in terror]'' Wait, wait, everybody! It’s okay! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's gigantic robot probe]'' I can't fight that thing! I can't even...I never...  ''[gasping]'' I'm hyperventilating! Does anybody have a giant paper bag?!
* Three weeks ago, if you had asked me to fight an alien robot, I would have said &quot;No can do!&quot; But I did it! Me! I'm still buzzing! Did you see how strong I was? There's probably not a jar in this world I can't open!
* ''[to her mother, after B.O.B. hugs her and nearly suffocates her in his gelatinous body]'' Sorry, Mom. He's a hugger.
* Doctor, I'd prefer that you didn't do your mad scientist laugh while I'm hooked up to this machine.
* Fresno!! Fresno.... In what universe is Fresno better than Paris, Derek?!
* I wouldn’t be so sure, and the name is Ginormica.
* This is Susan Murphy, saying, &quot;Goodbye, Derek!&quot;

== Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D ==
* ''[to Susan]'' Whatever mad scientist made you... he really went all-out.
* They called me crazy! But I'll show them! I'll show them all! ''[does a classic &quot;mad scientist&quot; laugh]''
* I am not a quack, I am a mad scientist!!!! There's a difference.
* You can't crush a cockroach! ''[laughs maniacally]''
* We all think that the new Susan is the cat's &quot;me-wow&quot;! ''[chuckles for a brief moment; no reaction from anyone else]'' I'm sorry.
* Anyone care for an atomic gin fizz? It's got quite a... ''[the gin explodes]'' ...kick.
* ''[after the ruined party]'' At least the garbage was free.
* ''[to after they rescue her]'' My dear, no matter what your size you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Susan down, shaking her]'' ...Nothing but a filthy carbon based lifeform!
* ''[dancing off against Gallaxhar's computer]'' One thing you don't know about me, my dear! My Ph.D is in... dance!
* By [[Stephen Hawking|Hawking]]'s chair!
* He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.

== The Missing Link ==
* Wow, look at you. I know what you're thinking: first day in prison, you want to take on the toughest guy in the yard? Well, I'd like to see you try.
* ''[lifting weights]'' Seven, eight... ''[notices Susan]'' Uh, 999, 1,000. Phew! I can not believe I did ten sets!
* ''[walking outside for the first time in decades]'' It's a little hotter than I remember. Has the Earth gotten warmer? That'd be great to know, it would be a very [[w:An Inconvenient Truth|convenient truth]].
* Finally some action! I'm gonna turn this over-sized tin can into a... really dented over-sized tin can...
* Re-lax. Old Link's got this all under control.
* ''[swims through the sewers, as he gets out he bangs his head on the lid]'' OW!! ''[he slowly removes the lid and climbs out]'' Yep, that hurt... ''[is suddenly hit by Dr. Cockroach's rocket-powered trolley car]''
* Does anybody have a 20 on Insectosaurus?
* Papa's a little outta shape.
* You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here.
* ''[at Susan's party, Link turns on some music and tries to mingle]'' How's it going? Que pasa, Girlfriend? Way to cut up a rug, Insecto! ''[Insectosaurus is slowly bouncing around]''
* Who wants to go for a swim with the Link?
* ''[emerges from a swimming pool, walking in a zombie-like manner and scaring people, screaming in pain]'' OOOOOOOOW!!!! CHLORINE!!!! '''CHLORINE!!! ''CHLORINE IN MY EYES!!!'''''
* Uh, who are we kidding? We could save every city on the planet, and they'd still treat us like they've always treated us... like ''monsters''.
* No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
* Yeah.. in that very chair. He’s still there.

== B.O.B ==
* ''[on brains and his lack of one]'' Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!
* ''[to Gallaxhar's robot probe; making signs to match his words, similar to Gromit from ''The Curse of the Were-Rabbit'']'' Hello! Hi! Howya doin'? Welcome! We are here to destroy you!
* What happened to the &quot;there isn't a jar in the world I can't open&quot; stuff? Wait! Did you find a jar that you couldn't open?! What was in it? Were there pickles in it? Where's the giant jar of pickles?
* ''[to a plate of Jello]'' Hi, I'm Benzoate Ostylezene Bicarbonate, or you can call me B.O.B, which ever's easier. ''[the Jello wobbles slightly]'' Did I come on too strong? I'm sorry, I'm a little rusty, I've been in prison my whole life— Why did I mention ''prison? [slams his fist on the table, making the Jello shake]'' Uh, I didn't mean to scare you! I'm just gonna go... Oh, I feel so stupid!
* ''[to Susan]'' I don't think your parents like me. And I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
* I may not have a brain, gentlemen, but I have an idea.
* That’s not true, the Invisible Man did!
* What are they running away from?
* ''[as the monsters' rather pathetic disguises actually fool Gallaxhar's clones]'' These disguises are da ''bomb''!
* ''[goes between Dr. Cockroach and a Gallaxhar clone]'' You wanna hurt my friends, you'll have to go through me! ''[the Gallaxhar clone punches him in the eye, knocking out both Dr. Cockroach and the clone in the process]'' Oh yeah.
* ''[confronting Derek, as if he were dating him rather than Susan]'' Derek, you are a selfish jerk, and guess what? I've met someone else! She's lime-green, she has 14 little chunks of pineapple inside her, and she is everything I deserve in life! I'm happy now, Derek! Without you! It's over! ''[Holds up the lime green jello he mentions and leaves triumphantly]''
* ''[to Susan, at the end of the movie]'' Wait, wait, wait, wa-wa-wait! You were dating Derek, too?! That two-timing jerk!

== General Warren R. Monger ==
* ''[To Susan, when she asks if her parents even know where she is]'' No, and they never will!  This place is an X-File, wrapped in a cover-up and deep-fried in paranoid conspiracy! There will be zero contact with the outside world. 
* Don't think of this as a prison. Think of it as a hotel that you can never leave, because it's locked from the outside!
* I'm not gonna kid you, Mr. President. These are dark times. The odds are against us. We need a Hail Mary pass! We need raw power! We need... ''[close up on his mouth]'' monsters.
* ''[after a cabinet member protests against his plan]'' You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a [[wedgie]]]''
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's robot]'' Oo-ee! Now ''that's'' a robot! Try not to damage it too much, monsters. I might take it back to the farm!
* First stop, Modesto! Ginormica, I called your family to tell them you were coming home. I also called the Modesto PD, told 'em not to shoot at ya!
* I'll come get if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead...or late.
* ''[after parachuting to the ground, his copilot is still clinging to him out of fear]'' You can let go of me now, Lieutenant.
* ''[addressing the monsters]'' I've been your warden for close to fifty years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth- ''[salutes the monsters, a sign of respect]''

== President Hathaway ==
* I must approach it alone. This is all about &quot;peaceful communication&quot;.
* Commander! Do something violent!
* So, that's how you wanna play it? Eat lead, alien robot! ''[fires three shots; the robot is heard munching on them]'' Evidently, they eat lead. Huh. ''[to a crowd]'' I am brave! I am a brave President!
* Listen up! I'm not going to go down as the President who was in office when the world came to an end, so somebody think of something, and think of it fast! ''[sips coffee]'' That is a good cup of joe.
* ''[after Monger gives a cabinet member a wedgie]'' Okay! ''[hides behind his chair]'' Stay where you are. General, I propose we go forward with your &quot;monsters vs. aliens&quot; idea... thingy.
* Okay, someone set the terror level to Code Brown, because I need to change my pants!

==Jerry==
* How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist, and we're never gonna see...
* Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! '''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''
* Supernova, this is [[w:Red Dwarf|Red Dwarf]]! We actually have one! Code [[w:Leonard Nimoy|Nimoy]]! I repeat! '''''CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''

==Ben==
* Hey, Jerry, you wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
* Wow, its energy signature is massive.
* Jerry, stop it! Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like... Modesto, California.

== Wendy Murphy ==
*Oh, Carl. It's her wedding day!
* ''[as Bob spits her out]'' I taste ham.
* Uh, honey, ever since you were a little baby, I knew that someday... you would save the world from an alien invasion from outer space.

== Others ==
* '''Wedding Guest''': ''[after Susan grows to her massive height]'' Here comes the bride!
* '''Derek Dietl''': ''[rejecting Susan]'' Don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life in someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow.
* '''TV Reporter''': Once again, a UFO has landed in America - the only country UFOs ever seem to land in!
* '''Announcer''': Channel 172.

== Dialogue ==
:''[first lines during The films begin with the black and white version of DreamWorks Animation logo; then the UFO suddenly flies in from the right arrives, abducts the Moon Boy looks up as it opens the hatch]''
:'''Moon Boy''': ''[while getting abducted]'' Huh? ''[flies away]'' Aaaaah!
:''[The UFO flies away, the camera film starts melting and burning animation transporting to the space scene, beginning the movie. Somewhere in space, a planet explodes, sending a glowing meteorite colliding down the vast space and heading to the direction of Earth. The Technicians Ben and Jerry are working in the Antarctic outpost, with Jerry on one of the computers and Ben at his desk, playing with a paddleball while &quot;When You See Those Flying Saucers&quot; by [[w:Buchanan Brothers|Buchanan Brothers]] playing on the radio. His [[w:HP Inc.|HP]] laptop goes off and types something down, and while at it, puts down his paddleball and turns off his radio.]''
:'''Ben''': Hey, Jerry. You might wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
:'''Jerry''': How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist. And we're never gonna see.
:'''Ben''': Wow, it's energy signiture is massive.
:'''Jerry''': Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! &lt;big&gt;'''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Ben''': Jerry, stop it! ''[locates the map]'' Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like.....Modesto, California.
:'''Jerry''': ''[picks up the phone]'' Supernova, this is Red Dwarf! We actually have one!  &lt;big&gt;'''''CODE NIMOY!!!! I REPEAT, CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Scene cuts to Panning down to her parents' house and inside, Susan, an inventor Girl was sleeping in her bed. She reached in for the light turns on her lamp and opened up her eyes.]'' 
:'''Susan''': &lt;big&gt;'''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Bridesmaids''': '''''AAHHH!!!!!'''''
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': [''wheezing'']
:''[The slurping came from one of them drinking coffee; and the flashes came from the third one taking pictures.]''
:'''Susan''': What are you guys doing here? It's 5 o'clock in the morning.
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': Hurry, turn on the TV! Turn it on now!
:''[Susan turns on the TV is set up on the other side of the room where Derek speaks, as Susan and her bridesmaids watch.]
:'''Derek''': And some early morning fog, giving way to sunny skies. Seventy-five degrees. A perfect day to stop by the old folk art and craft show down at the fairgrounds, or a perfect day to marry Susan Murphy.
:''[Susan moves closer to the TV as Derek makes a heart with his hands.]''
:'''Derek''': I love you, baby.
:'''Susan''': I love you, too.
:'''Bridesmaids''': Aww.
:'''Woman''': Aww.
:'''Derek''': And good morning, Modesto!
:'''News Technician''': Channel 172.
:''[Susan and two of her bridesmaids pose for a picture together]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Dietl''': One thumb's shorter than the other. It runs in the family.
:'''Susan''': Derek doesn't have that?
:'''Mama Dietl''': Ah, it skips a generation. But your kids are gonna have it! ''[laughs maniacally]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wendy''': ''[calling for Susan and looking for her]'' '''''SUSAN!''''' Where could she be? '''''SUSAN! WHERE ARE YOU?!''''' ''[sees her daughter walking up the hill, with her wedding dress a little dirty]'' Susan! Where have you been?
:'''Susan''': I think I just got hit by a meteorite.
:'''Wendy''': Oh, Susan. Every bride feels that way on her wedding day. ''[brings her daughter into the church]'' My goodness, look at you. You're filthy. Thank Gosh I have wet ones.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': ''[gasps at Susan's appearance]'' Wow. You're… glowing.
:'''Susan''': ''[unaware that she is glowing green; sweetly]'' Thank you.
:'''Derek''': No. No, Susan, you're, like, really glowing. You're ''green!''
:'''Susan''': ''[looks at her glowing left arm and gasps]'' Oh, no! ''[suddenly starts growing with her hair turning white]'' Derek!
:''[Everyone in the church watches her &quot;growth spurt&quot; in horror]''
:'''Wendy''': ''[horrifyingly shocked]'' Oh, my gosh!
:'''Derek''': What is going on?! What is happening here?!
:'''Susan''': You're all shrinking!
:'''Derek''': Uh-uh! You're growing!
:'''Susan''': Well, make it stop!
:'''Priest''': Get me the Government! ''[jumps through the window]''
:'''Susan''': This is Impossible! No, This can't be happening. ''[The woman screams and all the people run away from the growing bride]'' 
:'''Susan''': Wait, wait. Everybody, It's OK! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
:'''Mama Dietl''': ''[trying to open the door and escape]'' Thumbs! Thumbs!
:'''Susan''': ''[desperately]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''DEREK!!! HELP ME!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[about B.O.B.]'' Forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain.
:'''B.O.B.''': Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!! As a matter of fact, I don't even have to... ''[starts gasping for air] I FORGOT HOW TO BREATHE, DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREATHE! HELP ME, DR. COCKROACH!''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[exasperated]'' Suck in, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[breathes normally]'' Thanks, Doc. You're a lifesaver.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': She's speechless!
:'''B.O.B.''': &quot;She&quot;?!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Yes, B.O.B., we are in the presence of a rare female monster.
:'''B.O.B.''': No way, it's a boy! Look at his boobies!
:''[awkward silence]''
:'''Missing Link''': We need to have a talk.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Gentlemen, I'm afraid we're not making a very good first impression.
:'''Missing Link''': Well, at least I'm talking! First new monster in years, and we couldn't get, like, a wolfman or a mummy? You know, someone I can play cards with.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Might we ask for your name, madam?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': No, no, no, we mean your ''monster'' name. What do people scream when they see you coming? You know, like &quot;Look out! Here comes...&quot;?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:''[silence]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Really?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[spookily]'' Susan! Ooh, I just scared myself! That is scary!
:'''Missing Link''': Yes. Eat time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Oh, please, God, tell me this isn't real. Please tell me I had a nervous breakdown at the wedding, and now I'm in a mental hospital on medication that's giving me hallucinations.
:''[she backs up slowly, but touches something hairy behind and looks up. Insectosaurus roars, Susan screams and runs.]''
:'''Missing Link''': Don't scare Insectosaurus! He's gonna pee himself, then we'll all be in trouble.
:'''Susan''': ''[runs to the gate]'' EVERY ROOM HAS A DOOR?! ''[pounds the gate]'' There's gotta be a door here!! Where's the door?!?!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[petting Insectosaurus]'' It's OK, buddy. Don't worry about it. Who's a handsome bug, huh? You like it when I rub your tummy?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicking]''  Please! Somebody! (Help!) I DON’T BELONG HERE! &lt;big
&gt;'''''LET ME OUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': Hey, hey, that is not a good idea.
:''[the cell door opens, two red lights shown from the dark. It emerges from there is General W.R. Monger, who has a strapped jet pack.]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Monsters, get back in your cells.
:''[Dr. Cockroach, BOB, and Missing Link get back in their respective cells, a chopper lures Insectosaurus into his cell with huge lights]''
:'''Susan''': ''[meeting General Monger]'' Uh, thank goodness! A real person! ''[notices his jetpack]'' You are a real person, right? You're not one of those half-person, half-machine, whatever you call those things?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': A [[w:cyborg|cyborg]]?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicked]'' Oh, no! YOU ARE A CYBORG!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Ma'am, I can assure you I am not a cyborg. The name is General Warren R. Monger. I'm in charge of this facility. ''[turns around]'' Now follow me. It is time for your orientation.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Dr. Cockroach is building an atomic bomb from Legos]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Uh, Susan. You wouldn't happen to have some uranium on you? I just need a smidge.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': ''[on walkie-talkie]'' Rescind Dr. Cockroach's toybox privileges. Immediately. ''[Susan's cell door opens]'' We’ve had the prison psychologist redecorate your cell. ''[a poster reads “Hang in there!]'' Try to keep you all calm-like.
:'''Susan''': ''[crying]'' But I don’t want a poster. I want a real kitten. Hanging from a real tree. ''[turns to General W. R. Monger]'' I wanna go home...
:'''General W.R. Monger ''': Uh, come on, Little Debbie, please don’t cry. It makes my knees hurt. Don’t think of this as a prison! Think of it as a hotel you never leave because it’s locked from the outside! ''[Susan goes in her cell]'' Oh! And, uh, one other thing, the government has changed your name to Ginormica!
:''[Susan slowly backs into a corner, sits down and sadly curls up in a fetal position]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cuthbert''': Don't rush me, Katie; I'm just not ready.
:'''Katie''': Oh, relax, Cuthbert, it's just like dancing. I'll lead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[President Hathaway goes to push a huge red button; all the advisers shout for him to not to]''
:'''Adviser Cole''': That button launches all of our nuclear missiles!
:'''President Hathaway''': Well, then which button gets me a latte?!
:'''Adviser Wedgie''': Err, that would be the ''other'' one, sir.
:''[the camera zips back to show an identical button next to the first one; the President pushes it and serves himself a cup of coffee]''
:'''President Hathaway''': What idiot designed this thing? ''[stares around accusingly]''
:'''Wilson''': You did, sir.
:'''President Hathaway''': Fair enough. Wilson, fire somebody!
:'''Wilson''': ''[off-screen]'' Yes, sir, Mr. President.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[General Monger explains his private operation to the government, showing images and video clips along the way]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Over the last 50 years, I have captured monsters on the rampage and locked them up in a secret prison facility. So secret, that the mere mention of its name is a federal offense!
:'''Advisor''': Is he referring to Area Fifty- ''[is shot in the neck with a tranquilizer dart and falls over]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Mr. President, say hello to Insectosaurus! ''[shows a tape of Insectosaurus going on a rampage in Tokyo. An aide drops a tray of china and screams.]'' Miss Ronson, please. Nuclear radiation turned him from a small grub into [[w:kaiju|a 350-foot tall monster that attacked Tokyo]]. Here we have the Missing Link... ''[Miss Ronson drops another tray of china and screams again.]'' ...A 20,000-year-old frozen fish-man who was thawed out by scientists. ''[shows a clip of the Missing Link's escape]'' He escaped and went on a rampage at his old watering hole... ''[shows a tape of the Missing Link on the beach in Florida]'' This handsome fellow is Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D, the most brilliant man in the world. He invented a scientific machine that would give humans the cockroach's ability to survive. ''[shows a black-and-white clip of Dr. Cockroach undergoing the experiment, giving himself his cockroach head]'' Unfortunately, there was a side-effect.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and drops another tray of china off-screen; Monger groans]'' Now, we call this thing B.O.B.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and dropped the tray of china off-screen again.] '''WILL SOMEONE GET HER OUT OF HERE?!?!''' [Two people throw Miss Ronson out of the room off-screen.]'' Thank you! A genetically-altered tomato was combined with a chemically altered ranch-flavored dessert topping at a snack food plant. The resulting goop gained consciousness and became an indestructible gelatinous mass. And our latest addition, Ginormica.
:''[He shows a picture of Susan at her failed wedding. Miss Ronson’s scream and the crash is heard, and it turns out to be the President's.]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[clears his throat]'' (Sorry about that.) General, continue.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Her entire body radiates with pure energy, giving her enormous strength and size. Sir, these monsters are our best and only chance to defeat that robot.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Don't we already have an alien problem, General? I don't think we need a monster problem too.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a wedgie]''
:''[board members in shock, even the President]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[stands up]'' Okay, stay where you are. ''[clears throat]'' General, I propose we go forward with your Monsters vs Aliens idea...thingy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here!
:'''B.O.B''': That’s not true, the Invisible Man did.
:'''Missing Link''': No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.
:'''B.O.B''': NOOO! 
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah…in that very chair.
:''[the camera pans to a chair in the very corner]''
:'''Missing Link''': He’s still there.
:''[B.O.B begins to weep quietly]''
:'''Missing Link''': You see what I’m saying? Nobody’s leaving, nobody’s ever getting out!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Great news, monsters, you’re getting out.
:'''Missing Link''': Until today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after being promised their freedom if they defeat Gallaxhar's robot]''
:'''Susan''': Soon I'll be back in Derek's arms... or he'll be in mine.
:'''Missing Link''': I can't wait for spring break back at Cocoa Beach, just freaking everybody out.
:'''B.O.B.''': And I'll go back to my lab and finally finish my experiments.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, that's ''me'', B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Then I'll be a really giant lady.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': That's Susan, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Fine. Then I'll go back to Modesto and be with Derek.
:'''Missing Link''': That's still Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': I think I at least deserve a chance to be with Derek!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the robot steps toward them]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! Will you look at the size of that-
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[pointing]'' '''FOOT!!!!'''
:''[Cockroach and Link dive out of the way and the robot's foot steps on B.O.B., then comes up, with B.O.B. stuck to the sole.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': I got him, you guys! I got-! ''[step]'' Don't worry, I won't let go! I'm wearing him down- ''[step]'' Please tell me he's slowing down!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Get to the city, Link. I'll catch up as soon as I can. ''[sees the train on truck]'' Or maybe you'll have to catch up with me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Susan fights Gallaxhar's robot, while preventing bystanders' cars from falling off the bridge.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! ''[two thumbs up]'' You're doing great!
:'''Susan''': ''[extremely annoyed]'' I'm doing everything!
:'''Missing Link''': Not for long! C'mon you guys, let's take this thing down! ''[runs into a deflector shield]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': A deflector shield. Typical. ''[Missing Link faints]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': Wow! You really are big. 
:'''Susan''': Yeah, but I'm still me. I'm still the girl you fell in love with.
:'''Derek''': Except you did just destroy the Golden Gate Bridge.
:'''Susan''': But that was the only way I could stop that giant robot! Did you ever think I could do that?!
:'''Derek''': No, I didn't. I can honestly say that it never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever occurred to me!
:'''Susan''': Look, I know this is a little weird - okay, it's a lot weird - but we'll figure it out. I know that together we can find a way to get me back to normal.
:'''Derek''': Susan, try to look at this from my perspective. I have an audience that depends on me for news, weather, sports and heart-warming fluff pieces. So you expect me to put all that on hold while you try to undo this thing that happened to you, that I had absolutely nothing to do with?
:'''Susan''': Yes, that's exactly what I expect. What about the life we always talked about? Don't you still want that?
:'''Derek''': Of course. I just...don't see how I can have that with you.
:'''Susan''': ''[On the verge of tears]'' Derek, please. Don't do this.
:'''Derek''': You have to face facts, Susan. And don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life on someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow. ''[heads to the door]'' I'm sorry. It's over. Good luck, Susan. ''[leaves]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Wow, what a shindig! Your parents really know how to throw it down. ''[taps at Missing Link]''
:'''Missing Link''': What? No, that was a great party. One of the best I've been to since I got out of prison.
:'''B.O.B.''': I must've been at a different party 'cause that's not how I interpreted it at all. I don't think your parents like me, and I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Well, at least the garbage was free, you know. ''[stammers]''
:'''Missing Link''': Ah, who are we kidding? We cound save every city on the planet and they'd still treat us the same way they've always treated us: like monsters.
:'''Susan''': Right. Monsters.
:'''Missing Link''': Anyway, how, uh, how is Derek?
:'''Susan''': ''[pause, then sighs]'' Derek's a selfish jerk.
:'''B.O.B.''': No!
:'''Susan''': Yes. All that talk about us - &quot;I'm so proud of us&quot;, &quot;Us just got a job in Fresno&quot; - There was no us, it was just Derek. Why did I have to get hit by a meteor to see that? I was such an idiot! ''[kicks the roof of the gas station, sending B.O.B. flying]'' Why did I think life with Derek would be so great anyway?! I mean, look at all the stuff I've done without him. Fighting an alien robot? That was me, not him! And that was amazing! Meeting you guys... ''[gets down on her knees so she can be face-to-face with the other monsters]'' ...amazing. ''[turns to Dr. Cockroach]'' Dr. Cockroach! You can crawl up walls and build a super-computer out of a pizza box, two cans of hairspray, and-!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And a paper clip!
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[turns to Missing Link]'' And you! You hardly need an introduction; you're the Missing Link! You personally carried 250 co-eds off Cocoa Beach and still had the strength to fight off the National Guard!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[proudly]'' And the Coast Guard! And also the lifeguard.
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[B.O.B. lands next to the other monsters.]'' B.O.B.! ''[turns him around so he's facing her]'' Who else could fall from unimaginable heights and end up without a single scratch?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[points to Missing Link]'' Link?
:'''Susan''': ''[correcting him]'' You.
:'''B.O.B.''': Amazing!
:''[Insectosaurus roars]''
:'''Missing Link''': Good point, Insecto! Susan, don't shortchange yourself.
:'''Susan''': Uh, I'm not gonna shortchange myself. ''[stands at full height again]'' Ever again.
:'''B.O.B.''': Testify!
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Oh, yes.
:''[a tractor beam picks up Susan]''
:'''Missing Link''': SUSAN!
:''[Insecto shoots out silk from his nose at Susan who grabs hold]''
:'''Missing Link''': Way to go, Insecto!
:''[Gallaxhar angrily hits a button and a phasoid cannon fires at Insecto]''
:'''Missing Link''': INSECTO, LOOK OUT!
:''[after Insectosaurus is shot by one of Gallaxhar's ship's cannons]''
:'''Susan''': INSECTOSAURUS!! '''''NO!!!!!!'''''
:''[Missing Link approaches the dying Insectosaurus]''
:'''Missing Link''': You're gonna make it. It's gonna be alright. Look at me! Don't you close those eyes. Don't you dare close those eyes! ''[Insectosaurus slowly closes his eyes]'' You can't...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Ginormica wakes up in Gallaxhar's ship, wearing a different, skin-tight suit. She gazes around at the scenery of the ship in a room full of giant robot probes similar to the one she and her friends fought earlier. She stands up to explore the ship, but before she could do so, she is imprisoned inside a pink laser cage machine, and she tries touching the pink energy, but she gets zapped. She then hears Gallaxhar's laugh as he approaches her]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': You must be terrified. You wake up in a ''strange'' place, wearing ''strange'' clothes, imprisoned by a ''strange'' being on a ''strange'' hovering device? ''Strange'', isn't it?
:'''Susan''': Hardly. It's not the first time.
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[pauses, deflated]'' Wow. You really get around. To the extraction chamber!
:''[the machine imprisoning Ginormica begins to follow Gallaxhar through the ship]''
:'''Susan''': Look, what is it that you want from me?
:'''Gallaxhar''': You have stolen what is rightfully mine!
:'''Susan''':  I didn't steal anything from you! (What are you talking about?)
:'''Gallaxhar''': Your enormous, ''grotesque'' body contains Quantonium, the most powerful substance in the universe. Did you really think you could keep it from me?
:'''Susan''': That's what this is all about?! You destroyed San Francisco, you terrified millions of people, you killed my friend, just to get to me?!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! Silence! Your voice is grating on my ear nubs. It's a shame you won't be around to see what the power of Quantonium can do IN THE TENTACLES OF SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!!
:'''Susan''': I know how to use it just FINE! ''[punches the force field]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Don't bother. That force field is impenetrab-- ''[she manages to break through the force field to get to Gallaxhar]'' What the flagnard!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[after extracting the Quantonium from Ginormica, shrinking her back to human-size]'' Now I can finally rebuild my civilization on a new planet! Any ideas on where I could set up shop? ''Your'' planet, perhaps?
:'''Susan''': You keep your slimy tentacles off my planet--! ''[tries to attack him, but he holds her back at tentacle-length]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Or what? If you wanted to stop me, you should have done it when you possessed the Quantonium. Now you're nothing.
:'''Susan''': There are innocent people down there who haven't done anything!
:'''Gallaxhar''': There were innocent people on ''my'' home planet, before it was destroyed!
:'''Susan''': Look, I'm sorry your planet was destroyed—
:'''Gallaxhar''': Uh, don't be! I'm the one who destroyed it. Confused? After I reveal my tale to you, everything will become crystal clear. Computer, initialize cloning machine!
:'''Gallaxhar's Computer''': Yes, Gallaxhar.
:''[Gallaxhar gets into the cloning machine with a mold that matches his body]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... ''[the machine closes down, scans his body and opens up again]'' No child should ever have to endure that!! So I went on the road with a giant... ''[the machine closes down again and scans his body and opens up once again]'' ...And then thereafter was married! Things were going well. Until ''she'' wanted... ''[the machine closes down a third time and opens up]'' So then, I was all, &quot;No way!&quot; And then she was all, &quot;Yes way!&quot; And then I was like... ''[the machine closes down a fourth time and opens up]'' But I told you too much already! ''[steps out of the machine]'' Let the birth of my new planet called... Uh... Gallaxhar's Planet, begin!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Alright, gentlemen, you got enough juice in those jetpacks to get you up there, but not enough to make it home. I'll come get you if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead... ''[Dr. Cockroach is in shock]'' ...or late. ''[Dr. Cockroach is mildly relieved]'' I've been your warden for close to 50 years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth... ''[salutes]''
:'''BOB''': ''[offended]'' That's rude! What did we do?
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, BOB, that's not rude. That's a sign of respect.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Gallaxhar addresses his army of clones]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Clone!
:'''All Gallaxhar clones''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': No, no, no, not all of you, you there! ''[The clones look confused]'' Erm, how do I do this? Three back! ''[The clones move around confused]'' No, no, no, no, that guy... Next to you... The one I'm pointing at! You! The one! Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! You! Clone, yes! Good! ''[One steps forward]'' Take the prisoner to the incinerator! She's useless to us now.
:'''Gallaxhar Clone''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Hail me...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': I can't believe you guys came to save me. Thank you.
:'''Missing Link''': Don't mention it. We monsters gotta stick together.
:'''Susan''': But I'm not a monster anymore. I'm just me.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': My dear, no matter what your size, you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Ginormica down by the suit, shaking her]'' nothing but a filthy carbon-based lifeform!
:'''Gallaxhar Clones''': Hail Gallaxar.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Hail Gallaxar.
:''[the Gallaxhar clones walk away]''
:'''BOB''': These disguises are the BOMB!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Now open the doors!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Even if I wanted to, I couldn't! That's what happens when you set a ship to self-destruct! Now we're all gonna die!! And there's nothing you can do about it, Susan!!
:'''Susan''': I wouldn't be so sure. And the name... is Ginormica! ''[fires the weapon she is carrying into the statue, so that the Quantonium-filled globe it holds falls on her, restoring her giant size and strength]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[thinking they are about to die (B.O.B., as usual, is blissfully unaware)]''
:'''Missing Link''': It's been an honor knowing you, Doc.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': The feeling's mutual, my friend.
:'''B.O.B.''': I'll see you guys tomorrow, for lunch!
:'''Missing Link''': That's right, B.O.B.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And they'll be ice-cream and cake and balloons.
:'''B.O.B.''': Cake and balloons for lunch?! It's gonna be the best day ever! I love you guys!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines; cut-scene just after the first cluster of credits]''
:'''President Hathaway''': Everyone, let's welcome my new Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Of Staff, General W.R. Monger!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Thank you, Mr. President. What a great way to celebrate my 90th birthday.
:'''President Hathaway''': Very good, Warren. All right. '''''Let's get it started in here!''''' Nerd.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Gentlemen, I have assembled a preliminary budget estimate for rebuilding San Francisco.
:'''President Hathaway''': Zoinkers? This is going to be a boring one. Good time for a cup of Joe. Warden, how do you take it?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Hit me with a double Venti, organic chocolate brownie Caramel Frappichino, extra hot with one inch of foam... ''[zooms in to his lips]'' ..Non-fat.
:'''President Hathaway''': You got it, black it is. ''[this time, he hits the nuke button; everyone panics]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': &lt;big&gt;'''''MY GOD-MAN!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[nonetheless still his cheerful self]'' Time to wave the white flag and head for the bunker, boys! Let's check the situation in 500 years. ''[pops his head into the audience]'' Who wants to freeze my head? ''[puts his eyeglasses up]''

== Taglines ==
* Alien problem? Monster solution.
* When aliens attack, monsters fight back
* Ooze gonna save us?
* When aliens attack, these guys got your back.
* Saving the day the monster way.

==Cast==
===Monsters===
* [[Will Arnett]] — The Missing Link
* [[w:Seth Rogen|Seth Rogen]] — B.O.B.
* [[Hugh Laurie]] — Dr. Cockroach, PhD
* [[Frank Welker]] — Insectosaurus

===Aliens===
* [[Rainn Wilson]] — Gallaxhar
* [[Amy Poehler]] — Gallaxhar's Computer

===Humans===
* [[Reese Witherspoon]] — Susan Murphy/Ginormica
* [[Kiefer Sutherland]] — General Warren R. Monger
* [[Stephen Colbert]] — President Hathaway 
* [[w:Paul Rudd|Paul Rudd]] — Derek Dietl
* [[w:Jeffrey Tambor|Jeffrey Tambor]] — Carl Murphy
* [[w:Julie White|Julie White]] — Wendy Murphy
* [[w:John Krasinski|John Krasinski]] — Cuthbert
* [[w:Ed Helms|Ed Helms]] — News Reporter
* [[w:Bridget Hoffman|Bridget Hoffman]] — Girl Screaming In The Car
* [[w:Anne Lockhart|Anne Lockhart]] — Girl Screaming In The Car

===Additional Voice===
* [[w:Jeffrey Katzenberg|Jeffrey Katzenberg]] — Moon Boy

== About ''Monsters vs. Aliens'' ==
* I think the main thing, for me, was finding a female character that I felt like really spoke to young women and that was really important to me. I didn’t want to be somebody’s girlfriend. Not to say that those roles aren’t as good but I loved the idea of this character being pro-active and driving her own story, changing her own life through her own will. That’s such a great message for young women and I’m so excited to be doing that and also, it brings the energy to the party. I’d go in there with such enthusiasm and excitement to be a part of something like that.
* There were definitely some disorienting moments where I had no idea what was going to happen with her. I remember one day I came in and we’d had like ten recording sessions and I said ‘how does this movie end? Do I die?’ I didn’t know what was going to happen and they’re like ‘oh, right. We never told you what the third act was’ (after the San Francisco chase scene). Where are we going to go from here? Then I found out there were a whole two acts after that. We worked on the first act so much to get it right.
:* Reese Witherspoon [http://collider.com/reese-witherspoon-interview-monsters-vs-aliens/ &quot;Reese Witherspoon Interview MONSTERS VS. ALIENS&quot;] by Steve 'Frosty' Weintraub, ''Collider'', January 12, 2009.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|0892782}}

{{Authority control}}

[[dv:Monsters vs. Aliens]]
[[Category:Monsters vs. Aliens (franchise)]]
[[Category:2009 animated films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Animated films about robots]]
[[Category:Animated films about extraterrestrial life]]
[[Category:Films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Films directed by Conrad Vernon]]
[[Category:Films directed by Rob Letterman]]
[[Category:Films about cloning]]
[[Category:Films about size change]]
[[Category:Films about alien invasions]]</text>
      <sha1>lzxnrb92gg2xnh7x8z0djb3aasl6mce</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965201</id>
      <parentid>3965200</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:45:00Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39924-89</username>
        <id>3350191</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965201</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42742" sha1="o7pjkkt9yfh8xssoej98uy87oipmi0a" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Monsters vs. Aliens}}''''' is a 2009 3D computer-animated film produced by [[w:Dreamworks Animation|DreamWorks Animation]] and distributed by [[w:Universal Pictures|Universal Pictures]]. It tells the story of a young inventor named Susan Murphy, who after being hit by a meteorite, is granted super-strength and a near 50-foot height by the foreign element contained within it. She is captured and imprisoned by the government until she and a squad of other imprisoned monsters are called upon to fend off an invading alien attack.

:''Directed by Conrad Vernon and Rob Letterman. Screenplay by Maya Forbes, Wallace Wolodarsky, Rob Letterman, Jonathan Aibel, and Glenn Berger. Story by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon.''

{{center|'''When aliens attack, monsters fight back.''' &lt;small&gt;[[#Taglines|Taglines]]&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Gallaxhar==
* The Omega Quadrant? Lame!
* Extract the Quantonium with extreme prejudice. I want it all. Every last drop!
* Nothing can stand in my way now!
* ''[looking at Susan on a monitor]'' Oh, you think because you're all big and strong, and you can destroy my robot probe, that you're gonna send me running and hiding?! My days of running and hiding are over. Computer set a course to Earth! I will retrieve the Quantonium myself... even if I need to rip it out of her body, one cell at a time!
* ''[Susan tries to escape his forcefield''] Don't bother, that forcefield is impenetrable-- ''[Susan smashes her fist through, nearly hitting Gallaxhar]'' WHAT THE FLAGNOG?!
* ''[telling his life-story; is constantly interrupted by his cloning machine pressing him down]'' Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... No child should ever have to endure that! So I went on the road, with a giant... And soon thereafter was married! Things were going well, until she wanted to... And I was all &quot;No way!&quot;, and she was all &quot;Yes way!&quot;, and I was like... But I've told you too much already!
* Let the birth of my new planet - now called... &quot;Gallaxhar's... Planet&quot; begin!!
* Humans of Earth! I have come in peace. You need not fear me. I mean you no harm. However, it may be important to know that most of you will not survive the next 24 hours. And those of you who do survive will be enslaved and experimented on. You should in no way take any of this personally — it's just business! So, just to recap: I come in peace, I mean you no harm, and you all will die. Gallaxhar out.
* Attention, all aliens! [[Destroy All Monsters|Destroy all monsters]]!
* Uh, Spaceballs! Divert the Quantonium to the bridge, and prepare my escape capsule!
* Attention, robot probes! Crush the earthling!
* Are you crazy?! You could have killed me!
* Like I told you before, you should have defeated me when you had the Quantonium! Have fun exploding!!
* ''[last lines before his death]'' Come on, come on!!!!

== Susan Murphy / Ginormica ==
* ''[as she grows, for the wedding guests flee in terror]'' Wait, wait, everybody! It’s okay! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's gigantic robot probe]'' I can't fight that thing! I can't even...I never...  ''[gasping]'' I'm hyperventilating! Does anybody have a giant paper bag?!
* Three weeks ago, if you had asked me to fight an alien robot, I would have said &quot;No can do!&quot; But I did it! Me! I'm still buzzing! Did you see how strong I was? There's probably not a jar in this world I can't open!
* ''[to her mother, after B.O.B. hugs her and nearly suffocates her in his gelatinous body]'' Sorry, Mom. He's a hugger.
* Doctor, I'd prefer that you didn't do your mad scientist laugh while I'm hooked up to this machine.
* Fresno!! Fresno.... In what universe is Fresno better than Paris, Derek?!
* I wouldn’t be so sure, and the name is Ginormica.
* This is Susan Murphy, saying, &quot;Goodbye, Derek!&quot;

== Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D ==
* ''[to Susan]'' Whatever mad scientist made you... he really went all-out.
* They called me crazy! But I'll show them! I'll show them all! ''[does a classic &quot;mad scientist&quot; laugh]''
* I am not a quack, I am a mad scientist!!!! There's a difference.
* You can't crush a cockroach! ''[laughs maniacally]''
* We all think that the new Susan is the cat's &quot;me-wow&quot;! ''[chuckles for a brief moment; no reaction from anyone else]'' I'm sorry.
* Anyone care for an atomic gin fizz? It's got quite a... ''[the gin explodes]'' ...kick.
* ''[after the ruined party]'' At least the garbage was free.
* ''[to after they rescue her]'' My dear, no matter what your size you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Susan down, shaking her]'' ...Nothing but a filthy carbon based lifeform!
* ''[dancing off against Gallaxhar's computer]'' One thing you don't know about me, my dear! My Ph.D is in... dance!
* By [[Stephen Hawking|Hawking]]'s chair!
* He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.

== The Missing Link ==
* Wow, look at you. I know what you're thinking: first day in prison, you want to take on the toughest guy in the yard? Well, I'd like to see you try.
* ''[lifting weights]'' Seven, eight... ''[notices Susan]'' Uh, 999, 1,000. Phew! I can not believe I did ten sets!
* ''[walking outside for the first time in decades]'' It's a little hotter than I remember. Has the Earth gotten warmer? That'd be great to know, it would be a very [[w:An Inconvenient Truth|convenient truth]].
* Finally some action! I'm gonna turn this over-sized tin can into a... really dented over-sized tin can...
* Re-lax. Old Link's got this all under control.
* ''[swims through the sewers, as he gets out he bangs his head on the lid]'' OW!! ''[he slowly removes the lid and climbs out]'' Yep, that hurt... ''[is suddenly hit by Dr. Cockroach's rocket-powered trolley car]''
* Does anybody have a 20 on Insectosaurus?
* Papa's a little outta shape.
* You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here.
* ''[at Susan's party, Link turns on some music and tries to mingle]'' How's it going? Que pasa, Girlfriend? Way to cut up a rug, Insecto! ''[Insectosaurus is slowly bouncing around]''
* Who wants to go for a swim with the Link?
* ''[emerges from a swimming pool, walking in a zombie-like manner and scaring people, screaming in pain]'' OOOOOOOOW!!!! CHLORINE!!!! '''CHLORINE!!! ''CHLORINE IN MY EYES!!!'''''
* Uh, who are we kidding? We could save every city on the planet, and they'd still treat us like they've always treated us... like ''monsters''.
* No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
* Yeah.. in that very chair. He’s still there.

== B.O.B ==
* ''[on brains and his lack of one]'' Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!
* ''[to Gallaxhar's robot probe; making signs to match his words, similar to Gromit from ''The Curse of the Were-Rabbit'']'' Hello! Hi! Howya doin'? Welcome! We are here to destroy you!
* What happened to the &quot;there isn't a jar in the world I can't open&quot; stuff? Wait! Did you find a jar that you couldn't open?! What was in it? Were there pickles in it? Where's the giant jar of pickles?
* ''[to a plate of Jello]'' Hi, I'm Benzoate Ostylezene Bicarbonate, or you can call me B.O.B, which ever's easier. ''[the Jello wobbles slightly]'' Did I come on too strong? I'm sorry, I'm a little rusty, I've been in prison my whole life— Why did I mention ''prison? [slams his fist on the table, making the Jello shake]'' Uh, I didn't mean to scare you! I'm just gonna go... Oh, I feel so stupid!
* ''[to Susan]'' I don't think your parents like me. And I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
* I may not have a brain, gentlemen, but I have an idea.
* That’s not true, the Invisible Man did!
* What are they running away from?
* ''[as the monsters' rather pathetic disguises actually fool Gallaxhar's clones]'' These disguises are da ''bomb''!
* ''[goes between Dr. Cockroach and a Gallaxhar clone]'' You wanna hurt my friends, you'll have to go through me! ''[the Gallaxhar clone punches him in the eye, knocking out both Dr. Cockroach and the clone in the process]'' Oh yeah.
* ''[confronting Derek, as if he were dating him rather than Susan]'' Derek, you are a selfish jerk, and guess what? I've met someone else! She's lime-green, she has 14 little chunks of pineapple inside her, and she is everything I deserve in life! I'm happy now, Derek! Without you! It's over! ''[Holds up the lime green jello he mentions and leaves triumphantly]''
* ''[to Susan, at the end of the movie]'' Wait, wait, wait, wa-wa-wait! You were dating Derek, too?! That two-timing jerk!

== General Warren R. Monger ==
* ''[To Susan, when she asks if her parents even know where she is]'' No, and they never will!  This place is an X-File, wrapped in a cover-up and deep-fried in paranoid conspiracy! There will be zero contact with the outside world. 
* Don't think of this as a prison. Think of it as a hotel that you can never leave, because it's locked from the outside!
* I'm not gonna kid you, Mr. President. These are dark times. The odds are against us. We need a Hail Mary pass! We need raw power! We need... ''[close up on his mouth]'' monsters.
* ''[after a cabinet member protests against his plan]'' You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a [[wedgie]]]''
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's robot]'' Oo-ee! Now ''that's'' a robot! Try not to damage it too much, monsters. I might take it back to the farm!
* First stop, Modesto! Ginormica, I called your family to tell them you were coming home. I also called the Modesto PD, told 'em not to shoot at ya!
* I'll come get if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead...or late.
* ''[after parachuting to the ground, his copilot is still clinging to him out of fear]'' You can let go of me now, Lieutenant.
* ''[addressing the monsters]'' I've been your warden for close to fifty years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth- ''[salutes the monsters, a sign of respect]''

== President Hathaway ==
* I must approach it alone. This is all about &quot;peaceful communication&quot;.
* Commander! Do something violent!
* So, that's how you wanna play it? Eat lead, alien robot! ''[fires three shots; the robot is heard munching on them]'' Evidently, they eat lead. Huh. ''[to a crowd]'' I am brave! I am a brave President!
* Listen up! I'm not going to go down as the President who was in office when the world came to an end, so somebody think of something, and think of it fast! ''[sips coffee]'' That is a good cup of joe.
* ''[after Monger gives a cabinet member a wedgie]'' Okay! ''[hides behind his chair]'' Stay where you are. General, I propose we go forward with your &quot;monsters vs. aliens&quot; idea... thingy.
* Okay, someone set the terror level to Code Brown, because I need to change my pants!

==Jerry==
* How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist, and we're never gonna see...
* Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! '''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''
* Supernova, this is [[w:Red Dwarf|Red Dwarf]]! We actually have one! Code [[w:Leonard Nimoy|Nimoy]]! I repeat! '''''CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''

==Ben==
* Hey, Jerry, you wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
* Wow, its energy signature is massive.
* Jerry, stop it! Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like... Modesto, California.

== Wendy Murphy ==
*Oh, Carl. It's her wedding day!
* ''[as Bob spits her out]'' I taste ham.
* Uh, honey, ever since you were a little baby, I knew that someday... you would save the world from an alien invasion from outer space.

== Others ==
* '''Wedding Guest''': ''[after Susan grows to her massive height]'' Here comes the bride!
* '''Derek Dietl''': ''[rejecting Susan]'' Don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life in someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow.
* '''TV Reporter''': Once again, a UFO has landed in America - the only country UFOs ever seem to land in!
* '''Announcer''': Channel 172.

== Dialogue ==
:''[first lines during The films begin with the black and white version of DreamWorks Animation logo; then the UFO suddenly flies in from the right arrives, abducts the Moon Boy looks up as it opens the hatch]''
:'''Moon Boy''': ''[while getting abducted]'' Huh? ''[flies away]'' Aaaaah!
:''[The UFO flies away, the camera film starts melting and burning animation transporting to the space scene, beginning the movie. Somewhere in space, a planet explodes, sending a glowing meteorite colliding down the vast space and heading to the direction of Earth. The Technicians Ben and Jerry are working in the Antarctic outpost, with Jerry on one of the computers and Ben at his desk, playing with a paddleball while &quot;When You See Those Flying Saucers&quot; by [[w:Buchanan Brothers|Buchanan Brothers]] playing on the radio. His [[w:HP Inc.|HP]] laptop goes off and types something down, and while at it, puts down his paddleball and turns off his radio.]''
:'''Ben''': Hey, Jerry. You might wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
:'''Jerry''': How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist. And we're never gonna see.
:'''Ben''': Wow, it's energy signiture is massive.
:'''Jerry''': Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! &lt;big&gt;'''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Ben''': Jerry, stop it! ''[locates the map]'' Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like.....Modesto, California.
:'''Jerry''': ''[picks up the phone]'' Supernova, this is Red Dwarf! We actually have one!  &lt;big&gt;'''''CODE NIMOY!!!! I REPEAT, CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Scene cuts to Panning down to her parents' house and inside, Susan, an inventor Girl was sleeping in her bed. She reached in for the light turns on her lamp and opened up her eyes.]'' 
:'''Susan''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Bridesmaids''': '''''AAHHH!!!!!'''''
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': [''wheezing'']
:''[The slurping came from one of them drinking coffee; and the flashes came from the third one taking pictures.]''
:'''Susan''': What are you guys doing here? It's 5 o'clock in the morning.
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': Hurry, turn on the TV! Turn it on now!
:''[Susan turns on the TV is set up on the other side of the room where Derek speaks, as Susan and her bridesmaids watch.]
:'''Derek''': And some early morning fog, giving way to sunny skies. Seventy-five degrees. A perfect day to stop by the old folk art and craft show down at the fairgrounds, or a perfect day to marry Susan Murphy.
:''[Susan moves closer to the TV as Derek makes a heart with his hands.]''
:'''Derek''': I love you, baby.
:'''Susan''': I love you, too.
:'''Bridesmaids''': Aww.
:'''Woman''': Aww.
:'''Derek''': And good morning, Modesto!
:'''News Technician''': Channel 172.
:''[Susan and two of her bridesmaids pose for a picture together]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Dietl''': One thumb's shorter than the other. It runs in the family.
:'''Susan''': Derek doesn't have that?
:'''Mama Dietl''': Ah, it skips a generation. But your kids are gonna have it! ''[laughs maniacally]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wendy''': ''[calling for Susan and looking for her]'' '''''SUSAN!''''' Where could she be? '''''SUSAN! WHERE ARE YOU?!''''' ''[sees her daughter walking up the hill, with her wedding dress a little dirty]'' Susan! Where have you been?
:'''Susan''': I think I just got hit by a meteorite.
:'''Wendy''': Oh, Susan. Every bride feels that way on her wedding day. ''[brings her daughter into the church]'' My goodness, look at you. You're filthy. Thank Gosh I have wet ones.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': ''[gasps at Susan's appearance]'' Wow. You're… glowing.
:'''Susan''': ''[unaware that she is glowing green; sweetly]'' Thank you.
:'''Derek''': No. No, Susan, you're, like, really glowing. You're ''green!''
:'''Susan''': ''[looks at her glowing left arm and gasps]'' Oh, no! ''[suddenly starts growing with her hair turning white and getting scared of Derek.]'' ''[scared]'' '''DEREK!'''
:''[Everyone in the church watches her &quot;growth spurt&quot;.]''
:'''Wendy''': ''[horrifyingly shocked]'' Oh, my gosh!
:'''Derek''': What is going on?! What is happening here?!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' You're all shrinking!
:'''Derek''': Uh-uh! You're growing!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' Well, make it stop!
:'''Priest''': Get me the Government! ''[jumps through the window]''
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' This is Impossible! No, This can't be happening. ''[The woman screams and all the people run away from the growing bride]'' 
:'''Susan''': Wait, wait. Everybody, It's OK! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
:'''Mama Dietl''': ''[trying to open the door and escape]'' Thumbs! Thumbs!
:'''Susan''': ''[desperately]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''DEREK! HELP ME!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[about B.O.B.]'' Forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain.
:'''B.O.B.''': Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!! As a matter of fact, I don't even have to... ''[starts gasping for air] I FORGOT HOW TO BREATHE, DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREATHE! HELP ME, DR. COCKROACH!''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[exasperated]'' Suck in, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[breathes normally]'' Thanks, Doc. You're a lifesaver.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': She's speechless!
:'''B.O.B.''': &quot;She&quot;?!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Yes, B.O.B., we are in the presence of a rare female monster.
:'''B.O.B.''': No way, it's a boy! Look at his boobies!
:''[awkward silence]''
:'''Missing Link''': We need to have a talk.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Gentlemen, I'm afraid we're not making a very good first impression.
:'''Missing Link''': Well, at least I'm talking! First new monster in years, and we couldn't get, like, a wolfman or a mummy? You know, someone I can play cards with.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Might we ask for your name, madam?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': No, no, no, we mean your ''monster'' name. What do people scream when they see you coming? You know, like &quot;Look out! Here comes...&quot;?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:''[silence]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Really?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[spookily]'' Susan! Ooh, I just scared myself! That is scary!
:'''Missing Link''': Yes. Eat time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Oh, please, Guys, tell me this isn't real. Please tell me I had a nervous breakdown at the wedding, and now I'm in a mental hospital on medication that's giving me hallucinations.
:''[she backs up slowly, but touches something hairy behind and looks up. Insectosaurus roars, Susan screams in terror and runs.]''
:'''Missing Link''': Don't scare Insectosaurus! He's gonna pee himself, then we'll all be in trouble.
:'''Susan''': ''[runs to the gate]'' EVERY ROOM HAS A DOOR?! ''[pounds the gate]'' There's gotta be a door here!! Where's the door?!?!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[petting Insectosaurus]'' It's OK, buddy. Don't worry about it. Who's a handsome bug, huh? You like it when I rub your tummy?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicking]''  Please! Somebody! (Help!) I DON’T BELONG HERE! &lt;big
&gt;'''''LET ME OUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': Hey, hey, that is not a good idea.
:''[the cell door opens, two red lights shown from the dark. It emerges from there is General W.R. Monger, who has a strapped jet pack.]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Monsters, get back in your cells.
:''[Dr. Cockroach, BOB, and Missing Link get back in their respective cells, a chopper lures Insectosaurus into his cell with huge lights]''
:'''Susan''': ''[meeting General Monger]'' Uh, thank goodness! A real person! ''[notices his jetpack]'' You are a real person, right? You're not one of those half-person, half-machine, whatever you call those things?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': A [[w:cyborg|cyborg]]?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicked]'' Oh, no! '''YOU ARE A CYBORG!'''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Young lady, I can assure you I am not a cyborg. The name is General Warren R. Monger. I'm in charge of this facility. ''[turns around]'' Now follow me. It is time for your orientation.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Dr. Cockroach is building an atomic bomb from Legos]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Uh, Susan. You wouldn't happen to have some uranium on you? I just need a smidge.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': ''[on walkie-talkie]'' Rescind Dr. Cockroach's toybox privileges. Immediately. ''[Susan's cell door opens]'' We’ve had the prison psychologist redecorate your cell. ''[a poster reads “Hang in there!]'' Try to keep you all calm-like.
:'''Susan''': ''[crying]'' But I don’t want a poster. I want a real kitten. Hanging from a real tree. ''[turns to General W. R. Monger]'' I wanna go home...
:'''General W.R. Monger ''': Uh, come on, Little Debbie, please don’t cry. It makes my knees hurt. Don’t think of this as a prison! Think of it as a hotel you never leave because it’s locked from the outside! ''[Susan goes in her cell]'' Oh! And, uh, one other thing, the government has changed your name to Ginormica!
:''[Susan slowly backs into a corner, sits down and sadly curls up in a fetal position]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cuthbert''': Don't rush me, Katie; I'm just not ready.
:'''Katie''': Oh, relax, Cuthbert, it's just like dancing. I'll lead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[President Hathaway goes to push a huge red button; all the advisers shout for him to not to]''
:'''Adviser Cole''': That button launches all of our nuclear missiles!
:'''President Hathaway''': Well, then which button gets me a latte?!
:'''Adviser Wedgie''': Err, that would be the ''other'' one, sir.
:''[the camera zips back to show an identical button next to the first one; the President pushes it and serves himself a cup of coffee]''
:'''President Hathaway''': What idiot designed this thing? ''[stares around accusingly]''
:'''Wilson''': You did, sir.
:'''President Hathaway''': Fair enough. Wilson, fire somebody!
:'''Wilson''': ''[off-screen]'' Yes, sir, Mr. President.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[General Monger explains his private operation to the government, showing images and video clips along the way]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Over the last 50 years, I have captured monsters on the rampage and locked them up in a secret prison facility. So secret, that the mere mention of its name is a federal offense!
:'''Advisor''': Is he referring to Area Fifty- ''[is shot in the neck with a tranquilizer dart and falls over]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Mr. President, say hello to Insectosaurus! ''[shows a tape of Insectosaurus going on a rampage in Tokyo. An aide drops a tray of china and screams.]'' Miss Ronson, please. Nuclear radiation turned him from a small grub into [[w:kaiju|a 350-foot tall monster that attacked Tokyo]]. Here we have the Missing Link... ''[Miss Ronson drops another tray of china and screams again.]'' ...A 20,000-year-old frozen fish-man who was thawed out by scientists. ''[shows a clip of the Missing Link's escape]'' He escaped and went on a rampage at his old watering hole... ''[shows a tape of the Missing Link on the beach in Florida]'' This handsome fellow is Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D, the most brilliant man in the world. He invented a scientific machine that would give humans the cockroach's ability to survive. ''[shows a black-and-white clip of Dr. Cockroach undergoing the experiment, giving himself his cockroach head]'' Unfortunately, there was a side-effect.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and drops another tray of china off-screen; Monger groans]'' Now, we call this thing B.O.B.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and dropped the tray of china off-screen again.] '''WILL SOMEONE GET HER OUT OF HERE?!?!''' [Two people throw Miss Ronson out of the room off-screen.]'' Thank you! A genetically-altered tomato was combined with a chemically altered ranch-flavored dessert topping at a snack food plant. The resulting goop gained consciousness and became an indestructible gelatinous mass. And our latest addition, Ginormica.
:''[He shows a picture of Susan at her failed wedding. Miss Ronson’s scream and the crash is heard, and it turns out to be the President's.]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[clears his throat]'' (Sorry about that.) General, continue.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Her entire body radiates with pure energy, giving her enormous strength and size. Sir, these monsters are our best and only chance to defeat that robot.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Don't we already have an alien problem, General? I don't think we need a monster problem too.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a wedgie]''
:''[board members in shock, even the President]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[stands up]'' Okay, stay where you are. ''[clears throat]'' General, I propose we go forward with your Monsters vs Aliens idea...thingy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here!
:'''B.O.B''': That’s not true, the Invisible Man did.
:'''Missing Link''': No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.
:'''B.O.B''': NOOO! 
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah…in that very chair.
:''[the camera pans to a chair in the very corner]''
:'''Missing Link''': He’s still there.
:''[B.O.B begins to weep quietly]''
:'''Missing Link''': You see what I’m saying? Nobody’s leaving, nobody’s ever getting out!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Great news, monsters, you’re getting out.
:'''Missing Link''': Until today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after being promised their freedom if they defeat Gallaxhar's robot]''
:'''Susan''': Soon I'll be back in Derek's arms... or he'll be in mine.
:'''Missing Link''': I can't wait for spring break back at Cocoa Beach, just freaking everybody out.
:'''B.O.B.''': And I'll go back to my lab and finally finish my experiments.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, that's ''me'', B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Then I'll be a really giant lady.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': That's Susan, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Fine. Then I'll go back to Modesto and be with Derek.
:'''Missing Link''': That's still Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': I think I at least deserve a chance to be with Derek!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the robot steps toward them]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! Will you look at the size of that-
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[pointing]'' '''FOOT!!!!'''
:''[Cockroach and Link dive out of the way and the robot's foot steps on B.O.B., then comes up, with B.O.B. stuck to the sole.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': I got him, you guys! I got-! ''[step]'' Don't worry, I won't let go! I'm wearing him down- ''[step]'' Please tell me he's slowing down!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Get to the city, Link. I'll catch up as soon as I can. ''[sees the train on truck]'' Or maybe you'll have to catch up with me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Susan fights Gallaxhar's robot, while preventing bystanders' cars from falling off the bridge.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! ''[two thumbs up]'' You're doing great!
:'''Susan''': ''[extremely annoyed]'' I'm doing everything!
:'''Missing Link''': Not for long! C'mon you guys, let's take this thing down! ''[runs into a deflector shield]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': A deflector shield. Typical. ''[Missing Link faints]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': Wow! You really are big. 
:'''Susan''': Yeah, but I'm still me. I'm still the girl you fell in love with.
:'''Derek''': Except you did just destroy the Golden Gate Bridge.
:'''Susan''': But that was the only way I could stop that giant robot! Did you ever think I could do that?!
:'''Derek''': No, I didn't. I can honestly say that it never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever occurred to me!
:'''Susan''': Look, I know this is a little weird - okay, it's a lot weird - but we'll figure it out. I know that together we can find a way to get me back to normal.
:'''Derek''': Susan, try to look at this from my perspective. I have an audience that depends on me for news, weather, sports and heart-warming fluff pieces. So you expect me to put all that on hold while you try to undo this thing that happened to you, that I had absolutely nothing to do with?
:'''Susan''': Yes, that's exactly what I expect. What about the life we always talked about? Don't you still want that?
:'''Derek''': Of course. I just...don't see how I can have that with you.
:'''Susan''': ''[On the verge of tears]'' Derek, please. Don't do this.
:'''Derek''': You have to face facts, Susan. And don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life on someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow. ''[heads to the door]'' I'm sorry. It's over. Good luck, Susan. ''[leaves]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Wow, what a shindig! Your parents really know how to throw it down. ''[taps at Missing Link]''
:'''Missing Link''': What? No, that was a great party. One of the best I've been to since I got out of prison.
:'''B.O.B.''': I must've been at a different party 'cause that's not how I interpreted it at all. I don't think your parents like me, and I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Well, at least the garbage was free, you know. ''[stammers]''
:'''Missing Link''': Ah, who are we kidding? We cound save every city on the planet and they'd still treat us the same way they've always treated us: like monsters.
:'''Susan''': Right. Monsters.
:'''Missing Link''': Anyway, how, uh, how is Derek?
:'''Susan''': ''[pause, then sighs]'' Derek's a selfish jerk.
:'''B.O.B.''': No!
:'''Susan''': Yes. All that talk about us - &quot;I'm so proud of us&quot;, &quot;Us just got a job in Fresno&quot; - There was no us, it was just Derek. Why did I have to get hit by a meteor to see that? I was such an idiot! ''[kicks the roof of the gas station, sending B.O.B. flying]'' Why did I think life with Derek would be so great anyway?! I mean, look at all the stuff I've done without him. Fighting an alien robot? That was me, not him! And that was amazing! Meeting you guys... ''[gets down on her knees so she can be face-to-face with the other monsters]'' ...amazing. ''[turns to Dr. Cockroach]'' Dr. Cockroach! You can crawl up walls and build a super-computer out of a pizza box, two cans of hairspray, and-!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And a paper clip!
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[turns to Missing Link]'' And you! You hardly need an introduction; you're the Missing Link! You personally carried 250 co-eds off Cocoa Beach and still had the strength to fight off the National Guard!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[proudly]'' And the Coast Guard! And also the lifeguard.
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[B.O.B. lands next to the other monsters.]'' B.O.B.! ''[turns him around so he's facing her]'' Who else could fall from unimaginable heights and end up without a single scratch?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[points to Missing Link]'' Link?
:'''Susan''': ''[correcting him]'' You.
:'''B.O.B.''': Amazing!
:''[Insectosaurus roars]''
:'''Missing Link''': Good point, Insecto! Susan, don't shortchange yourself.
:'''Susan''': Uh, I'm not gonna shortchange myself. ''[stands at full height again]'' Ever again.
:'''B.O.B.''': Testify!
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Oh, yes.
:''[a tractor beam picks up Susan]''
:'''Missing Link''': SUSAN!
:''[Insecto shoots out silk from his nose at Susan who grabs hold]''
:'''Missing Link''': Way to go, Insecto!
:''[Gallaxhar angrily hits a button and a phasoid cannon fires at Insecto]''
:'''Missing Link''': INSECTO, LOOK OUT!
:''[after Insectosaurus is shot by one of Gallaxhar's ship's cannons]''
:'''Susan''': INSECTOSAURUS!! '''''NO!!!!!!'''''
:''[Missing Link approaches the dying Insectosaurus]''
:'''Missing Link''': You're gonna make it. It's gonna be alright. Look at me! Don't you close those eyes. Don't you dare close those eyes! ''[Insectosaurus slowly closes his eyes]'' You can't...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Ginormica wakes up in Gallaxhar's ship, wearing a different, skin-tight suit. She gazes around at the scenery of the ship in a room full of giant robot probes similar to the one she and her friends fought earlier. She stands up to explore the ship, but before she could do so, she is imprisoned inside a pink laser cage machine, and she tries touching the pink energy, but she gets zapped. She then hears Gallaxhar's laugh as he approaches her]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': You must be terrified. You wake up in a ''strange'' place, wearing ''strange'' clothes, imprisoned by a ''strange'' being on a ''strange'' hovering device? ''Strange'', isn't it?
:'''Susan''': Hardly. It's not the first time.
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[pauses, deflated]'' Wow. You really get around. To the extraction chamber!
:''[the machine imprisoning Ginormica begins to follow Gallaxhar through the ship]''
:'''Susan''': Look, what is it that you want from me?
:'''Gallaxhar''': You have stolen what is rightfully mine!
:'''Susan''':  I didn't steal anything from you! (What are you talking about?)
:'''Gallaxhar''': Your enormous, ''grotesque'' body contains Quantonium, the most powerful substance in the universe. Did you really think you could keep it from me?
:'''Susan''': That's what this is all about?! You destroyed San Francisco, you terrified millions of people, you killed my friend, just to get to me?!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! Silence! Your voice is grating on my ear nubs. It's a shame you won't be around to see what the power of Quantonium can do IN THE TENTACLES OF SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!!
:'''Susan''': I know how to use it just FINE! ''[punches the force field]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Don't bother. That force field is impenetrab-- ''[she manages to break through the force field to get to Gallaxhar]'' What the flagnard!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[after extracting the Quantonium from Ginormica, shrinking her back to human-size]'' Now I can finally rebuild my civilization on a new planet! Any ideas on where I could set up shop? ''Your'' planet, perhaps?
:'''Susan''': You keep your slimy tentacles off my planet--! ''[tries to attack him, but he holds her back at tentacle-length]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Or what? If you wanted to stop me, you should have done it when you possessed the Quantonium. Now you're nothing.
:'''Susan''': There are innocent people down there who haven't done anything!
:'''Gallaxhar''': There were innocent people on ''my'' home planet, before it was destroyed!
:'''Susan''': Look, I'm sorry your planet was destroyed—
:'''Gallaxhar''': Uh, don't be! I'm the one who destroyed it. Confused? After I reveal my tale to you, everything will become crystal clear. Computer, initialize cloning machine!
:'''Gallaxhar's Computer''': Yes, Gallaxhar.
:''[Gallaxhar gets into the cloning machine with a mold that matches his body]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... ''[the machine closes down, scans his body and opens up again]'' No child should ever have to endure that!! So I went on the road with a giant... ''[the machine closes down again and scans his body and opens up once again]'' ...And then thereafter was married! Things were going well. Until ''she'' wanted... ''[the machine closes down a third time and opens up]'' So then, I was all, &quot;No way!&quot; And then she was all, &quot;Yes way!&quot; And then I was like... ''[the machine closes down a fourth time and opens up]'' But I told you too much already! ''[steps out of the machine]'' Let the birth of my new planet called... Uh... Gallaxhar's Planet, begin!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Alright, gentlemen, you got enough juice in those jetpacks to get you up there, but not enough to make it home. I'll come get you if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead... ''[Dr. Cockroach is in shock]'' ...or late. ''[Dr. Cockroach is mildly relieved]'' I've been your warden for close to 50 years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth... ''[salutes]''
:'''BOB''': ''[offended]'' That's rude! What did we do?
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, BOB, that's not rude. That's a sign of respect.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Gallaxhar addresses his army of clones]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Clone!
:'''All Gallaxhar clones''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': No, no, no, not all of you, you there! ''[The clones look confused]'' Erm, how do I do this? Three back! ''[The clones move around confused]'' No, no, no, no, that guy... Next to you... The one I'm pointing at! You! The one! Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! You! Clone, yes! Good! ''[One steps forward]'' Take the prisoner to the incinerator! She's useless to us now.
:'''Gallaxhar Clone''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Hail me...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': I can't believe you guys came to save me. Thank you.
:'''Missing Link''': Don't mention it. We monsters gotta stick together.
:'''Susan''': But I'm not a monster anymore. I'm just me.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': My dear, no matter what your size, you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Ginormica down by the suit, shaking her]'' nothing but a filthy carbon-based lifeform!
:'''Gallaxhar Clones''': Hail Gallaxar.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Hail Gallaxar.
:''[the Gallaxhar clones walk away]''
:'''BOB''': These disguises are the BOMB!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Now open the doors!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Even if I wanted to, I couldn't! That's what happens when you set a ship to self-destruct! Now we're all gonna die!! And there's nothing you can do about it, Susan!!
:'''Susan''': I wouldn't be so sure. And the name... is Ginormica! ''[fires the weapon she is carrying into the statue, so that the Quantonium-filled globe it holds falls on her, restoring her giant size and strength]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[thinking they are about to die (B.O.B., as usual, is blissfully unaware)]''
:'''Missing Link''': It's been an honor knowing you, Doc.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': The feeling's mutual, my friend.
:'''B.O.B.''': I'll see you guys tomorrow, for lunch!
:'''Missing Link''': That's right, B.O.B.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And they'll be ice-cream and cake and balloons.
:'''B.O.B.''': Cake and balloons for lunch?! It's gonna be the best day ever! I love you guys!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines; cut-scene just after the first cluster of credits]''
:'''President Hathaway''': Everyone, let's welcome my new Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Of Staff, General W.R. Monger!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Thank you, Mr. President. What a great way to celebrate my 90th birthday.
:'''President Hathaway''': Very good, Warren. All right. '''''Let's get it started in here!''''' Nerd.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Gentlemen, I have assembled a preliminary budget estimate for rebuilding San Francisco.
:'''President Hathaway''': Zoinkers? This is going to be a boring one. Good time for a cup of Joe. Warden, how do you take it?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Hit me with a double Venti, organic chocolate brownie Caramel Frappichino, extra hot with one inch of foam... ''[zooms in to his lips]'' ..Non-fat.
:'''President Hathaway''': You got it, black it is. ''[this time, he hits the nuke button; everyone panics]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': &lt;big&gt;'''''MY GOD-MAN!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[nonetheless still his cheerful self]'' Time to wave the white flag and head for the bunker, boys! Let's check the situation in 500 years. ''[pops his head into the audience]'' Who wants to freeze my head? ''[puts his eyeglasses up]''

== Taglines ==
* Alien problem? Monster solution.
* When aliens attack, monsters fight back
* Ooze gonna save us?
* When aliens attack, these guys got your back.
* Saving the day the monster way.

==Cast==
===Monsters===
* [[Will Arnett]] — The Missing Link
* [[w:Seth Rogen|Seth Rogen]] — B.O.B.
* [[Hugh Laurie]] — Dr. Cockroach, PhD
* [[Frank Welker]] — Insectosaurus

===Aliens===
* [[Rainn Wilson]] — Gallaxhar
* [[Amy Poehler]] — Gallaxhar's Computer

===Humans===
* [[Reese Witherspoon]] — Susan Murphy/Ginormica
* [[Kiefer Sutherland]] — General Warren R. Monger
* [[Stephen Colbert]] — President Hathaway 
* [[w:Paul Rudd|Paul Rudd]] — Derek Dietl
* [[w:Jeffrey Tambor|Jeffrey Tambor]] — Carl Murphy
* [[w:Julie White|Julie White]] — Wendy Murphy
* [[w:John Krasinski|John Krasinski]] — Cuthbert
* [[w:Ed Helms|Ed Helms]] — News Reporter
* [[w:Bridget Hoffman|Bridget Hoffman]] — Girl Screaming In The Car
* [[w:Anne Lockhart|Anne Lockhart]] — Girl Screaming In The Car

===Additional Voice===
* [[w:Jeffrey Katzenberg|Jeffrey Katzenberg]] — Moon Boy

== About ''Monsters vs. Aliens'' ==
* I think the main thing, for me, was finding a female character that I felt like really spoke to young women and that was really important to me. I didn’t want to be somebody’s girlfriend. Not to say that those roles aren’t as good but I loved the idea of this character being pro-active and driving her own story, changing her own life through her own will. That’s such a great message for young women and I’m so excited to be doing that and also, it brings the energy to the party. I’d go in there with such enthusiasm and excitement to be a part of something like that.
* There were definitely some disorienting moments where I had no idea what was going to happen with her. I remember one day I came in and we’d had like ten recording sessions and I said ‘how does this movie end? Do I die?’ I didn’t know what was going to happen and they’re like ‘oh, right. We never told you what the third act was’ (after the San Francisco chase scene). Where are we going to go from here? Then I found out there were a whole two acts after that. We worked on the first act so much to get it right.
:* Reese Witherspoon [http://collider.com/reese-witherspoon-interview-monsters-vs-aliens/ &quot;Reese Witherspoon Interview MONSTERS VS. ALIENS&quot;] by Steve 'Frosty' Weintraub, ''Collider'', January 12, 2009.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|0892782}}

{{Authority control}}

[[dv:Monsters vs. Aliens]]
[[Category:Monsters vs. Aliens (franchise)]]
[[Category:2009 animated films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Animated films about robots]]
[[Category:Animated films about extraterrestrial life]]
[[Category:Films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Films directed by Conrad Vernon]]
[[Category:Films directed by Rob Letterman]]
[[Category:Films about cloning]]
[[Category:Films about size change]]
[[Category:Films about alien invasions]]</text>
      <sha1>o7pjkkt9yfh8xssoej98uy87oipmi0a</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965205</id>
      <parentid>3965201</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:52:42Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39924-89</username>
        <id>3350191</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965205</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42774" sha1="mbs7b2b0c0zmtd3owg6so37js2v1khk" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Monsters vs. Aliens}}''''' is a 2009 3D computer-animated film produced by [[w:Dreamworks Animation|DreamWorks Animation]] and distributed by [[w:Universal Pictures|Universal Pictures]]. It tells the story of a young inventor named Susan Murphy, who after being hit by a meteorite, is granted super-strength and a near 50-foot height by the foreign element contained within it. She is captured and imprisoned by the government until she and a squad of other imprisoned monsters are called upon to fend off an invading alien attack.

:''Directed by Conrad Vernon and Rob Letterman. Screenplay by Maya Forbes, Wallace Wolodarsky, Rob Letterman, Jonathan Aibel, and Glenn Berger. Story by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon.''

{{center|'''When aliens attack, monsters fight back.''' &lt;small&gt;[[#Taglines|Taglines]]&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Gallaxhar==
* The Omega Quadrant? Lame!
* Extract the Quantonium with extreme prejudice. I want it all. Every last drop!
* Nothing can stand in my way now!
* ''[looking at Susan on a monitor]'' Oh, you think because you're all big and strong, and you can destroy my robot probe, that you're gonna send me running and hiding?! My days of running and hiding are over. Computer set a course to Earth! I will retrieve the Quantonium myself... even if I need to rip it out of her body, one cell at a time!
* ''[Susan tries to escape his forcefield''] Don't bother, that forcefield is impenetrable-- ''[Susan smashes her fist through, nearly hitting Gallaxhar]'' WHAT THE FLAGNOG?!
* ''[telling his life-story; is constantly interrupted by his cloning machine pressing him down]'' Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... No child should ever have to endure that! So I went on the road, with a giant... And soon thereafter was married! Things were going well, until she wanted to... And I was all &quot;No way!&quot;, and she was all &quot;Yes way!&quot;, and I was like... But I've told you too much already!
* Let the birth of my new planet - now called... &quot;Gallaxhar's... Planet&quot; begin!!
* Humans of Earth! I have come in peace. You need not fear me. I mean you no harm. However, it may be important to know that most of you will not survive the next 24 hours. And those of you who do survive will be enslaved and experimented on. You should in no way take any of this personally — it's just business! So, just to recap: I come in peace, I mean you no harm, and you all will die. Gallaxhar out.
* Attention, all aliens! [[Destroy All Monsters|Destroy all monsters]]!
* Uh, Spaceballs! Divert the Quantonium to the bridge, and prepare my escape capsule!
* Attention, robot probes! Crush the earthling!
* Are you crazy?! You could have killed me!
* Like I told you before, you should have defeated me when you had the Quantonium! Have fun exploding!!
* ''[last lines before his death]'' Come on, come on!!!!

== Susan Murphy / Ginormica ==
* ''[as she grows, for the wedding guests flee in terror]'' Wait, wait, everybody! It’s okay! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's gigantic robot probe]'' I can't fight that thing! I can't even...I never...  ''[gasping]'' I'm hyperventilating! Does anybody have a giant paper bag?!
* Three weeks ago, if you had asked me to fight an alien robot, I would have said &quot;No can do!&quot; But I did it! Me! I'm still buzzing! Did you see how strong I was? There's probably not a jar in this world I can't open!
* ''[to her mother, after B.O.B. hugs her and nearly suffocates her in his gelatinous body]'' Sorry, Mom. He's a hugger.
* Doctor, I'd prefer that you didn't do your mad scientist laugh while I'm hooked up to this machine.
* Fresno!! Fresno.... In what universe is Fresno better than Paris, Derek?!
* I wouldn’t be so sure, and the name is Ginormica.
* This is Susan Murphy, saying, &quot;Goodbye, Derek!&quot;

== Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D ==
* ''[to Susan]'' Whatever mad scientist made you... he really went all-out.
* They called me crazy! But I'll show them! I'll show them all! ''[does a classic &quot;mad scientist&quot; laugh]''
* I am not a quack, I am a mad scientist!!!! There's a difference.
* You can't crush a cockroach! ''[laughs maniacally]''
* We all think that the new Susan is the cat's &quot;me-wow&quot;! ''[chuckles for a brief moment; no reaction from anyone else]'' I'm sorry.
* Anyone care for an atomic gin fizz? It's got quite a... ''[the gin explodes]'' ...kick.
* ''[after the ruined party]'' At least the garbage was free.
* ''[to after they rescue her]'' My dear, no matter what your size you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Susan down, shaking her]'' ...Nothing but a filthy carbon based lifeform!
* ''[dancing off against Gallaxhar's computer]'' One thing you don't know about me, my dear! My Ph.D is in... dance!
* By [[Stephen Hawking|Hawking]]'s chair!
* He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.

== The Missing Link ==
* Wow, look at you. I know what you're thinking: first day in prison, you want to take on the toughest guy in the yard? Well, I'd like to see you try.
* ''[lifting weights]'' Seven, eight... ''[notices Susan]'' Uh, 999, 1,000. Phew! I can not believe I did ten sets!
* ''[walking outside for the first time in decades]'' It's a little hotter than I remember. Has the Earth gotten warmer? That'd be great to know, it would be a very [[w:An Inconvenient Truth|convenient truth]].
* Finally some action! I'm gonna turn this over-sized tin can into a... really dented over-sized tin can...
* Re-lax. Old Link's got this all under control.
* ''[swims through the sewers, as he gets out he bangs his head on the lid]'' OW!! ''[he slowly removes the lid and climbs out]'' Yep, that hurt... ''[is suddenly hit by Dr. Cockroach's rocket-powered trolley car]''
* Does anybody have a 20 on Insectosaurus?
* Papa's a little outta shape.
* You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here.
* ''[at Susan's party, Link turns on some music and tries to mingle]'' How's it going? Que pasa, Girlfriend? Way to cut up a rug, Insecto! ''[Insectosaurus is slowly bouncing around]''
* Who wants to go for a swim with the Link?
* ''[emerges from a swimming pool, walking in a zombie-like manner and scaring people, screaming in pain]'' OOOOOOOOW!!!! CHLORINE!!!! '''CHLORINE!!! ''CHLORINE IN MY EYES!!!'''''
* Uh, who are we kidding? We could save every city on the planet, and they'd still treat us like they've always treated us... like ''monsters''.
* No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
* Yeah.. in that very chair. He’s still there.

== B.O.B ==
* ''[on brains and his lack of one]'' Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!
* ''[to Gallaxhar's robot probe; making signs to match his words, similar to Gromit from ''The Curse of the Were-Rabbit'']'' Hello! Hi! Howya doin'? Welcome! We are here to destroy you!
* What happened to the &quot;there isn't a jar in the world I can't open&quot; stuff? Wait! Did you find a jar that you couldn't open?! What was in it? Were there pickles in it? Where's the giant jar of pickles?
* ''[to a plate of Jello]'' Hi, I'm Benzoate Ostylezene Bicarbonate, or you can call me B.O.B, which ever's easier. ''[the Jello wobbles slightly]'' Did I come on too strong? I'm sorry, I'm a little rusty, I've been in prison my whole life— Why did I mention ''prison? [slams his fist on the table, making the Jello shake]'' Uh, I didn't mean to scare you! I'm just gonna go... Oh, I feel so stupid!
* ''[to Susan]'' I don't think your parents like me. And I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
* I may not have a brain, gentlemen, but I have an idea.
* That’s not true, the Invisible Man did!
* What are they running away from?
* ''[as the monsters' rather pathetic disguises actually fool Gallaxhar's clones]'' These disguises are da ''bomb''!
* ''[goes between Dr. Cockroach and a Gallaxhar clone]'' You wanna hurt my friends, you'll have to go through me! ''[the Gallaxhar clone punches him in the eye, knocking out both Dr. Cockroach and the clone in the process]'' Oh yeah.
* ''[confronting Derek, as if he were dating him rather than Susan]'' Derek, you are a selfish jerk, and guess what? I've met someone else! She's lime-green, she has 14 little chunks of pineapple inside her, and she is everything I deserve in life! I'm happy now, Derek! Without you! It's over! ''[Holds up the lime green jello he mentions and leaves triumphantly]''
* ''[to Susan, at the end of the movie]'' Wait, wait, wait, wa-wa-wait! You were dating Derek, too?! That two-timing jerk!

== General Warren R. Monger ==
* ''[To Susan, when she asks if her parents even know where she is]'' No, and they never will!  This place is an X-File, wrapped in a cover-up and deep-fried in paranoid conspiracy! There will be zero contact with the outside world. 
* Don't think of this as a prison. Think of it as a hotel that you can never leave, because it's locked from the outside!
* I'm not gonna kid you, Mr. President. These are dark times. The odds are against us. We need a Hail Mary pass! We need raw power! We need... ''[close up on his mouth]'' monsters.
* ''[after a cabinet member protests against his plan]'' You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a [[wedgie]]]''
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's robot]'' Oo-ee! Now ''that's'' a robot! Try not to damage it too much, monsters. I might take it back to the farm!
* First stop, Modesto! Ginormica, I called your family to tell them you were coming home. I also called the Modesto PD, told 'em not to shoot at ya!
* I'll come get if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead...or late.
* ''[after parachuting to the ground, his copilot is still clinging to him out of fear]'' You can let go of me now, Lieutenant.
* ''[addressing the monsters]'' I've been your warden for close to fifty years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth- ''[salutes the monsters, a sign of respect]''

== President Hathaway ==
* I must approach it alone. This is all about &quot;peaceful communication&quot;.
* Commander! Do something violent!
* So, that's how you wanna play it? Eat lead, alien robot! ''[fires three shots; the robot is heard munching on them]'' Evidently, they eat lead. Huh. ''[to a crowd]'' I am brave! I am a brave President!
* Listen up! I'm not going to go down as the President who was in office when the world came to an end, so somebody think of something, and think of it fast! ''[sips coffee]'' That is a good cup of joe.
* ''[after Monger gives a cabinet member a wedgie]'' Okay! ''[hides behind his chair]'' Stay where you are. General, I propose we go forward with your &quot;monsters vs. aliens&quot; idea... thingy.
* Okay, someone set the terror level to Code Brown, because I need to change my pants!

==Jerry==
* How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist, and we're never gonna see...
* Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! '''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''
* Supernova, this is [[w:Red Dwarf|Red Dwarf]]! We actually have one! Code [[w:Leonard Nimoy|Nimoy]]! I repeat! '''''CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''

==Ben==
* Hey, Jerry, you wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
* Wow, its energy signature is massive.
* Jerry, stop it! Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like... Modesto, California.

== Wendy Murphy ==
*Oh, Carl. It's her wedding day!
* ''[as Bob spits her out]'' I taste ham.
* Uh, honey, ever since you were a little baby, I knew that someday... you would save the world from an alien invasion from outer space.

== Others ==
* '''Wedding Guest''': ''[after Susan grows to her massive height]'' Here comes the bride!
* '''Derek Dietl''': ''[rejecting Susan]'' Don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life in someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow.
* '''TV Reporter''': Once again, a UFO has landed in America - the only country UFOs ever seem to land in!
* '''Announcer''': Channel 172.

== Dialogue ==
:''[first lines during The films begin with the black and white version of DreamWorks Animation logo; then the UFO suddenly flies in from the right arrives, abducts the Moon Boy looks up as it opens the hatch]''
:'''Moon Boy''': ''[while getting abducted]'' Huh? ''[flies away]'' Aaaaah!
:''[The UFO flies away, the camera film starts melting and burning animation transporting to the space scene, beginning the movie. Somewhere in space, a planet explodes, sending a glowing meteorite colliding down the vast space and heading to the direction of Earth. The Technicians Ben and Jerry are working in the Antarctic outpost, with Jerry on one of the computers and Ben at his desk, playing with a paddleball while &quot;When You See Those Flying Saucers&quot; by [[w:Buchanan Brothers|Buchanan Brothers]] playing on the radio. His [[w:HP Inc.|HP]] laptop goes off and types something down, and while at it, puts down his paddleball and turns off his radio.]''
:'''Ben''': Hey, Jerry. You might wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
:'''Jerry''': How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist. And we're never gonna see.
:'''Ben''': Wow, it's energy signiture is massive.
:'''Jerry''': Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! &lt;big&gt;'''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Ben''': Jerry, stop it! ''[locates the map]'' Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like.....Modesto, California.
:'''Jerry''': ''[picks up the phone]'' Supernova, this is Red Dwarf! We actually have one!  &lt;big&gt;'''''CODE NIMOY! I REPEAT, CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Scene cuts to Panning down to her parents' house and inside, Susan, an inventor Girl was sleeping in her bed. She reached in for the light turns on her lamp and opened up her eyes with her scream.]'' 
:'''Susan''': ''[screaming]'' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Bridesmaids''': '''''AAHHH!!!!!'''''
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': [''wheezing'']
:''[The slurping came from one of them drinking coffee; and the flashes came from the third one taking pictures.]''
:'''Susan''': What are you guys doing here? It's 5 o'clock in the morning.
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': Hurry, turn on the TV! Turn it on now!
:''[Susan turns on the TV is set up on the other side of the room where Derek speaks, as Susan and her bridesmaids watch.]
:'''Derek''': And some early morning fog, giving way to sunny skies. Seventy-five degrees. A perfect day to stop by the old folk art and craft show down at the fairgrounds, or a perfect day to marry Susan Murphy.
:''[Susan moves closer to the TV as Derek makes a heart with his hands.]''
:'''Derek''': I love you, baby.
:'''Susan''': I love you, too.
:'''Bridesmaids''': Aww.
:'''Woman''': Aww.
:'''Derek''': And good morning, Modesto!
:'''News Technician''': Channel 172.
:''[Susan and two of her bridesmaids pose for a picture together]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Dietl''': One thumb's shorter than the other. It runs in the family.
:'''Susan''': Derek doesn't have that?
:'''Mama Dietl''': Ah, it skips a generation. But your kids are gonna have it! ''[laughs maniacally]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wendy''': ''[calling for Susan and looking for her]'' '''''SUSAN!''''' Where could she be? '''''SUSAN! WHERE ARE YOU?!''''' ''[sees her daughter walking up the hill, with her wedding dress a little dirty]'' Susan! Where have you been?
:'''Susan''': I think I just got hit by a meteorite.
:'''Wendy''': Oh, Susan. Every bride feels that way on her wedding day. ''[brings her daughter into the church]'' My goodness, look at you. You're filthy. Thank Gosh I have wet ones.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': ''[gasps at Susan's appearance]'' Wow. You're… glowing.
:'''Susan''': ''[unaware that she is glowing green; sweetly]'' Thank you.
:'''Derek''': No. No, Susan, you're, like, really glowing. You're ''green!''
:'''Susan''': ''[looks at her glowing left arm and gasps]'' Oh, no! ''[suddenly starts growing with her hair turning white and getting scared of Derek.]'' ''[scared]'' '''DEREK!'''
:''[Everyone in the church watches her &quot;growth spurt&quot;.]''
:'''Wendy''': ''[horrifyingly shocked]'' Oh, my gosh!
:'''Derek''': What is going on?! What is happening here?!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' You're all shrinking!
:'''Derek''': Uh-uh! You're growing!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' Well, make it stop!
:'''Priest''': Get me the Government! ''[jumps through the window]''
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' This is Impossible! No, This can't be happening. ''[The woman screams and all the people run away from the growing bride]'' 
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' Wait, wait. Everybody, It's OK! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
:'''Mama Dietl''': ''[trying to open the door and escape]'' Thumbs! Thumbs!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''DEREK! HELP ME!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[about B.O.B.]'' Forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain.
:'''B.O.B.''': Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!! As a matter of fact, I don't even have to... ''[starts gasping for air] I FORGOT HOW TO BREATHE, DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREATHE! HELP ME, DR. COCKROACH!''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[exasperated]'' Suck in, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[breathes normally]'' Thanks, Doc. You're a lifesaver.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': She's speechless!
:'''B.O.B.''': &quot;She&quot;?!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Yes, B.O.B., we are in the presence of a rare female monster.
:'''B.O.B.''': No way, it's a boy! Look at his boobies!
:''[awkward silence]''
:'''Missing Link''': We need to have a talk.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Gentlemen, I'm afraid we're not making a very good first impression.
:'''Missing Link''': Well, at least I'm talking! First new monster in years, and we couldn't get, like, a wolfman or a mummy? You know, someone I can play cards with.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Might we ask for your name, madam?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': No, no, no, we mean your ''monster'' name. What do people scream when they see you coming? You know, like &quot;Look out! Here comes...&quot;?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:''[silence]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Really?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[spookily]'' Susan! Ooh, I just scared myself! That is scary!
:'''Missing Link''': Yes. Eat time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Oh, please, Guys, tell me this isn't real. Please tell me I had a nervous breakdown at the wedding, and now I'm in a mental hospital on medication that's giving me hallucinations.
:''[she backs up slowly, but touches something hairy behind and looks up. Insectosaurus roars, Susan screams in terror and runs.]''
:'''Missing Link''': Don't scare Insectosaurus! He's gonna pee himself, then we'll all be in trouble.
:'''Susan''': ''[runs to the gate]'' EVERY ROOM HAS A DOOR?! ''[pounds the gate]'' There's gotta be a door here!! Where's the door?!?!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[petting Insectosaurus]'' It's OK, buddy. Don't worry about it. Who's a handsome bug, huh? You like it when I rub your tummy?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicking]''  Please! Somebody! (Help!) I DON’T BELONG HERE! &lt;big
&gt;'''''LET ME OUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': Hey, hey, that is not a good idea.
:''[the cell door opens, two red lights shown from the dark. It emerges from there is General W.R. Monger, who has a strapped jet pack.]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Monsters, get back in your cells.
:''[Dr. Cockroach, BOB, and Missing Link get back in their respective cells, a chopper lures Insectosaurus into his cell with huge lights]''
:'''Susan''': ''[meeting General Monger]'' Uh, thank goodness! A real person! ''[notices his jetpack]'' You are a real person, right? You're not one of those half-person, half-machine, whatever you call those things?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': A [[w:cyborg|cyborg]]?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicked]'' Oh, no! '''YOU ARE A CYBORG!'''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Young lady, I can assure you I am not a cyborg. The name is General Warren R. Monger. I'm in charge of this facility. ''[turns around]'' Now follow me. It is time for your orientation.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Dr. Cockroach is building an atomic bomb from Legos]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Uh, Susan. You wouldn't happen to have some uranium on you? I just need a smidge.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': ''[on walkie-talkie]'' Rescind Dr. Cockroach's toybox privileges. Immediately. ''[Susan's cell door opens]'' We’ve had the prison psychologist redecorate your cell. ''[a poster reads “Hang in there!]'' Try to keep you all calm-like.
:'''Susan''': ''[crying]'' But I don’t want a poster. I want a real kitten. Hanging from a real tree. ''[turns to General W. R. Monger]'' I wanna go home...
:'''General W.R. Monger ''': Uh, come on, Little Debbie, please don’t cry. It makes my knees hurt. Don’t think of this as a prison! Think of it as a hotel you never leave because it’s locked from the outside! ''[Susan goes in her cell]'' Oh! And, uh, one other thing, the government has changed your name to Ginormica!
:''[Susan slowly backs into a corner, sits down and sadly curls up in a fetal position]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cuthbert''': Don't rush me, Katie; I'm just not ready.
:'''Katie''': Oh, relax, Cuthbert, it's just like dancing. I'll lead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[President Hathaway goes to push a huge red button; all the advisers shout for him to not to]''
:'''Adviser Cole''': That button launches all of our nuclear missiles!
:'''President Hathaway''': Well, then which button gets me a latte?!
:'''Adviser Wedgie''': Err, that would be the ''other'' one, sir.
:''[the camera zips back to show an identical button next to the first one; the President pushes it and serves himself a cup of coffee]''
:'''President Hathaway''': What idiot designed this thing? ''[stares around accusingly]''
:'''Wilson''': You did, sir.
:'''President Hathaway''': Fair enough. Wilson, fire somebody!
:'''Wilson''': ''[off-screen]'' Yes, sir, Mr. President.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[General Monger explains his private operation to the government, showing images and video clips along the way]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Over the last 50 years, I have captured monsters on the rampage and locked them up in a secret prison facility. So secret, that the mere mention of its name is a federal offense!
:'''Advisor''': Is he referring to Area Fifty- ''[is shot in the neck with a tranquilizer dart and falls over]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Mr. President, say hello to Insectosaurus! ''[shows a tape of Insectosaurus going on a rampage in Tokyo. An aide drops a tray of china and screams.]'' Miss Ronson, please. Nuclear radiation turned him from a small grub into [[w:kaiju|a 350-foot tall monster that attacked Tokyo]]. Here we have the Missing Link... ''[Miss Ronson drops another tray of china and screams again.]'' ...A 20,000-year-old frozen fish-man who was thawed out by scientists. ''[shows a clip of the Missing Link's escape]'' He escaped and went on a rampage at his old watering hole... ''[shows a tape of the Missing Link on the beach in Florida]'' This handsome fellow is Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D, the most brilliant man in the world. He invented a scientific machine that would give humans the cockroach's ability to survive. ''[shows a black-and-white clip of Dr. Cockroach undergoing the experiment, giving himself his cockroach head]'' Unfortunately, there was a side-effect.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and drops another tray of china off-screen; Monger groans]'' Now, we call this thing B.O.B.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and dropped the tray of china off-screen again.] '''WILL SOMEONE GET HER OUT OF HERE?!?!''' [Two people throw Miss Ronson out of the room off-screen.]'' Thank you! A genetically-altered tomato was combined with a chemically altered ranch-flavored dessert topping at a snack food plant. The resulting goop gained consciousness and became an indestructible gelatinous mass. And our latest addition, Ginormica.
:''[He shows a picture of Susan at her failed wedding. Miss Ronson’s scream and the crash is heard, and it turns out to be the President's.]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[clears his throat]'' (Sorry about that.) General, continue.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Her entire body radiates with pure energy, giving her enormous strength and size. Sir, these monsters are our best and only chance to defeat that robot.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Don't we already have an alien problem, General? I don't think we need a monster problem too.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a wedgie]''
:''[board members in shock, even the President]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[stands up]'' Okay, stay where you are. ''[clears throat]'' General, I propose we go forward with your Monsters vs Aliens idea...thingy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here!
:'''B.O.B''': That’s not true, the Invisible Man did.
:'''Missing Link''': No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.
:'''B.O.B''': NOOO! 
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah…in that very chair.
:''[the camera pans to a chair in the very corner]''
:'''Missing Link''': He’s still there.
:''[B.O.B begins to weep quietly]''
:'''Missing Link''': You see what I’m saying? Nobody’s leaving, nobody’s ever getting out!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Great news, monsters, you’re getting out.
:'''Missing Link''': Until today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after being promised their freedom if they defeat Gallaxhar's robot]''
:'''Susan''': Soon I'll be back in Derek's arms... or he'll be in mine.
:'''Missing Link''': I can't wait for spring break back at Cocoa Beach, just freaking everybody out.
:'''B.O.B.''': And I'll go back to my lab and finally finish my experiments.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, that's ''me'', B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Then I'll be a really giant lady.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': That's Susan, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Fine. Then I'll go back to Modesto and be with Derek.
:'''Missing Link''': That's still Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': I think I at least deserve a chance to be with Derek!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the robot steps toward them]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! Will you look at the size of that-
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[pointing]'' '''FOOT!!!!'''
:''[Cockroach and Link dive out of the way and the robot's foot steps on B.O.B., then comes up, with B.O.B. stuck to the sole.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': I got him, you guys! I got-! ''[step]'' Don't worry, I won't let go! I'm wearing him down- ''[step]'' Please tell me he's slowing down!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Get to the city, Link. I'll catch up as soon as I can. ''[sees the train on truck]'' Or maybe you'll have to catch up with me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Susan fights Gallaxhar's robot, while preventing bystanders' cars from falling off the bridge.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! ''[two thumbs up]'' You're doing great!
:'''Susan''': ''[extremely annoyed]'' I'm doing everything!
:'''Missing Link''': Not for long! C'mon you guys, let's take this thing down! ''[runs into a deflector shield]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': A deflector shield. Typical. ''[Missing Link faints]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': Wow! You really are big. 
:'''Susan''': Yeah, but I'm still me. I'm still the girl you fell in love with.
:'''Derek''': Except you did just destroy the Golden Gate Bridge.
:'''Susan''': But that was the only way I could stop that giant robot! Did you ever think I could do that?!
:'''Derek''': No, I didn't. I can honestly say that it never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever occurred to me!
:'''Susan''': Look, I know this is a little weird - okay, it's a lot weird - but we'll figure it out. I know that together we can find a way to get me back to normal.
:'''Derek''': Susan, try to look at this from my perspective. I have an audience that depends on me for news, weather, sports and heart-warming fluff pieces. So you expect me to put all that on hold while you try to undo this thing that happened to you, that I had absolutely nothing to do with?
:'''Susan''': Yes, that's exactly what I expect. What about the life we always talked about? Don't you still want that?
:'''Derek''': Of course. I just...don't see how I can have that with you.
:'''Susan''': ''[On the verge of tears]'' Derek, please. Don't do this.
:'''Derek''': You have to face facts, Susan. And don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life on someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow. ''[heads to the door]'' I'm sorry. It's over. Good luck, Susan. ''[leaves]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Wow, what a shindig! Your parents really know how to throw it down. ''[taps at Missing Link]''
:'''Missing Link''': What? No, that was a great party. One of the best I've been to since I got out of prison.
:'''B.O.B.''': I must've been at a different party 'cause that's not how I interpreted it at all. I don't think your parents like me, and I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Well, at least the garbage was free, you know. ''[stammers]''
:'''Missing Link''': Ah, who are we kidding? We cound save every city on the planet and they'd still treat us the same way they've always treated us: like monsters.
:'''Susan''': Right. Monsters.
:'''Missing Link''': Anyway, how, uh, how is Derek?
:'''Susan''': ''[pause, then sighs]'' Derek's a selfish jerk.
:'''B.O.B.''': No!
:'''Susan''': Yes. All that talk about us - &quot;I'm so proud of us&quot;, &quot;Us just got a job in Fresno&quot; - There was no us, it was just Derek. Why did I have to get hit by a meteor to see that? I was such an idiot! ''[kicks the roof of the gas station, sending B.O.B. flying]'' Why did I think life with Derek would be so great anyway?! I mean, look at all the stuff I've done without him. Fighting an alien robot? That was me, not him! And that was amazing! Meeting you guys... ''[gets down on her knees so she can be face-to-face with the other monsters]'' ...amazing. ''[turns to Dr. Cockroach]'' Dr. Cockroach! You can crawl up walls and build a super-computer out of a pizza box, two cans of hairspray, and-!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And a paper clip!
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[turns to Missing Link]'' And you! You hardly need an introduction; you're the Missing Link! You personally carried 250 co-eds off Cocoa Beach and still had the strength to fight off the National Guard!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[proudly]'' And the Coast Guard! And also the lifeguard.
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[B.O.B. lands next to the other monsters.]'' B.O.B.! ''[turns him around so he's facing her]'' Who else could fall from unimaginable heights and end up without a single scratch?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[points to Missing Link]'' Link?
:'''Susan''': ''[correcting him]'' You.
:'''B.O.B.''': Amazing!
:''[Insectosaurus roars]''
:'''Missing Link''': Good point, Insecto! Susan, don't shortchange yourself.
:'''Susan''': Uh, I'm not gonna shortchange myself. ''[stands at full height again]'' Ever again.
:'''B.O.B.''': Testify!
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Oh, yes.
:''[a tractor beam picks up Susan]''
:'''Missing Link''': SUSAN!
:''[Insecto shoots out silk from his nose at Susan who grabs hold]''
:'''Missing Link''': Way to go, Insecto!
:''[Gallaxhar angrily hits a button and a phasoid cannon fires at Insecto]''
:'''Missing Link''': INSECTO, LOOK OUT!
:''[after Insectosaurus is shot by one of Gallaxhar's ship's cannons]''
:'''Susan''': INSECTOSAURUS!! '''''NO!!!!!!'''''
:''[Missing Link approaches the dying Insectosaurus]''
:'''Missing Link''': You're gonna make it. It's gonna be alright. Look at me! Don't you close those eyes. Don't you dare close those eyes! ''[Insectosaurus slowly closes his eyes]'' You can't...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Ginormica wakes up in Gallaxhar's ship, wearing a different, skin-tight suit. She gazes around at the scenery of the ship in a room full of giant robot probes similar to the one she and her friends fought earlier. She stands up to explore the ship, but before she could do so, she is imprisoned inside a pink laser cage machine, and she tries touching the pink energy, but she gets zapped. She then hears Gallaxhar's laugh as he approaches her]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': You must be terrified. You wake up in a ''strange'' place, wearing ''strange'' clothes, imprisoned by a ''strange'' being on a ''strange'' hovering device? ''Strange'', isn't it?
:'''Susan''': Hardly. It's not the first time.
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[pauses, deflated]'' Wow. You really get around. To the extraction chamber!
:''[the machine imprisoning Ginormica begins to follow Gallaxhar through the ship]''
:'''Susan''': Look, what is it that you want from me?
:'''Gallaxhar''': You have stolen what is rightfully mine!
:'''Susan''':  I didn't steal anything from you! (What are you talking about?)
:'''Gallaxhar''': Your enormous, ''grotesque'' body contains Quantonium, the most powerful substance in the universe. Did you really think you could keep it from me?
:'''Susan''': That's what this is all about?! You destroyed San Francisco, you terrified millions of people, you killed my friend, just to get to me?!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! Silence! Your voice is grating on my ear nubs. It's a shame you won't be around to see what the power of Quantonium can do IN THE TENTACLES OF SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!!
:'''Susan''': I know how to use it just FINE! ''[punches the force field]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Don't bother. That force field is impenetrab-- ''[she manages to break through the force field to get to Gallaxhar]'' What the flagnard!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[after extracting the Quantonium from Ginormica, shrinking her back to human-size]'' Now I can finally rebuild my civilization on a new planet! Any ideas on where I could set up shop? ''Your'' planet, perhaps?
:'''Susan''': You keep your slimy tentacles off my planet--! ''[tries to attack him, but he holds her back at tentacle-length]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Or what? If you wanted to stop me, you should have done it when you possessed the Quantonium. Now you're nothing.
:'''Susan''': There are innocent people down there who haven't done anything!
:'''Gallaxhar''': There were innocent people on ''my'' home planet, before it was destroyed!
:'''Susan''': Look, I'm sorry your planet was destroyed—
:'''Gallaxhar''': Uh, don't be! I'm the one who destroyed it. Confused? After I reveal my tale to you, everything will become crystal clear. Computer, initialize cloning machine!
:'''Gallaxhar's Computer''': Yes, Gallaxhar.
:''[Gallaxhar gets into the cloning machine with a mold that matches his body]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... ''[the machine closes down, scans his body and opens up again]'' No child should ever have to endure that!! So I went on the road with a giant... ''[the machine closes down again and scans his body and opens up once again]'' ...And then thereafter was married! Things were going well. Until ''she'' wanted... ''[the machine closes down a third time and opens up]'' So then, I was all, &quot;No way!&quot; And then she was all, &quot;Yes way!&quot; And then I was like... ''[the machine closes down a fourth time and opens up]'' But I told you too much already! ''[steps out of the machine]'' Let the birth of my new planet called... Uh... Gallaxhar's Planet, begin!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Alright, gentlemen, you got enough juice in those jetpacks to get you up there, but not enough to make it home. I'll come get you if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead... ''[Dr. Cockroach is in shock]'' ...or late. ''[Dr. Cockroach is mildly relieved]'' I've been your warden for close to 50 years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth... ''[salutes]''
:'''BOB''': ''[offended]'' That's rude! What did we do?
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, BOB, that's not rude. That's a sign of respect.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Gallaxhar addresses his army of clones]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Clone!
:'''All Gallaxhar clones''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': No, no, no, not all of you, you there! ''[The clones look confused]'' Erm, how do I do this? Three back! ''[The clones move around confused]'' No, no, no, no, that guy... Next to you... The one I'm pointing at! You! The one! Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! You! Clone, yes! Good! ''[One steps forward]'' Take the prisoner to the incinerator! She's useless to us now.
:'''Gallaxhar Clone''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Hail me...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': I can't believe you guys came to save me. Thank you.
:'''Missing Link''': Don't mention it. We monsters gotta stick together.
:'''Susan''': But I'm not a monster anymore. I'm just me.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': My dear, no matter what your size, you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Ginormica down by the suit, shaking her]'' nothing but a filthy carbon-based lifeform!
:'''Gallaxhar Clones''': Hail Gallaxar.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Hail Gallaxar.
:''[the Gallaxhar clones walk away]''
:'''BOB''': These disguises are the BOMB!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Now open the doors!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Even if I wanted to, I couldn't! That's what happens when you set a ship to self-destruct! Now we're all gonna die!! And there's nothing you can do about it, Susan!!
:'''Susan''': I wouldn't be so sure. And the name... is Ginormica! ''[fires the weapon she is carrying into the statue, so that the Quantonium-filled globe it holds falls on her, restoring her giant size and strength]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[thinking they are about to die (B.O.B., as usual, is blissfully unaware)]''
:'''Missing Link''': It's been an honor knowing you, Doc.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': The feeling's mutual, my friend.
:'''B.O.B.''': I'll see you guys tomorrow, for lunch!
:'''Missing Link''': That's right, B.O.B.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And they'll be ice-cream and cake and balloons.
:'''B.O.B.''': Cake and balloons for lunch?! It's gonna be the best day ever! I love you guys!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines; cut-scene just after the first cluster of credits]''
:'''President Hathaway''': Everyone, let's welcome my new Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Of Staff, General W.R. Monger!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Thank you, Mr. President. What a great way to celebrate my 90th birthday.
:'''President Hathaway''': Very good, Warren. All right. '''''Let's get it started in here!''''' Nerd.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Gentlemen, I have assembled a preliminary budget estimate for rebuilding San Francisco.
:'''President Hathaway''': Zoinkers? This is going to be a boring one. Good time for a cup of Joe. Warden, how do you take it?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Hit me with a double Venti, organic chocolate brownie Caramel Frappichino, extra hot with one inch of foam... ''[zooms in to his lips]'' ..Non-fat.
:'''President Hathaway''': You got it, black it is. ''[this time, he hits the nuke button; everyone panics]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': &lt;big&gt;'''''MY GOD-MAN!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[nonetheless still his cheerful self]'' Time to wave the white flag and head for the bunker, boys! Let's check the situation in 500 years. ''[pops his head into the audience]'' Who wants to freeze my head? ''[puts his eyeglasses up]''

== Taglines ==
* Alien problem? Monster solution.
* When aliens attack, monsters fight back
* Ooze gonna save us?
* When aliens attack, these guys got your back.
* Saving the day the monster way.

==Cast==
===Monsters===
* [[Will Arnett]] — The Missing Link
* [[w:Seth Rogen|Seth Rogen]] — B.O.B.
* [[Hugh Laurie]] — Dr. Cockroach, PhD
* [[Frank Welker]] — Insectosaurus

===Aliens===
* [[Rainn Wilson]] — Gallaxhar
* [[Amy Poehler]] — Gallaxhar's Computer

===Humans===
* [[Reese Witherspoon]] — Susan Murphy/Ginormica
* [[Kiefer Sutherland]] — General Warren R. Monger
* [[Stephen Colbert]] — President Hathaway 
* [[w:Paul Rudd|Paul Rudd]] — Derek Dietl
* [[w:Jeffrey Tambor|Jeffrey Tambor]] — Carl Murphy
* [[w:Julie White|Julie White]] — Wendy Murphy
* [[w:John Krasinski|John Krasinski]] — Cuthbert
* [[w:Ed Helms|Ed Helms]] — News Reporter
* [[w:Bridget Hoffman|Bridget Hoffman]] — Girl Screaming In The Car
* [[w:Anne Lockhart|Anne Lockhart]] — Girl Screaming In The Car

===Additional Voice===
* [[w:Jeffrey Katzenberg|Jeffrey Katzenberg]] — Moon Boy

== About ''Monsters vs. Aliens'' ==
* I think the main thing, for me, was finding a female character that I felt like really spoke to young women and that was really important to me. I didn’t want to be somebody’s girlfriend. Not to say that those roles aren’t as good but I loved the idea of this character being pro-active and driving her own story, changing her own life through her own will. That’s such a great message for young women and I’m so excited to be doing that and also, it brings the energy to the party. I’d go in there with such enthusiasm and excitement to be a part of something like that.
* There were definitely some disorienting moments where I had no idea what was going to happen with her. I remember one day I came in and we’d had like ten recording sessions and I said ‘how does this movie end? Do I die?’ I didn’t know what was going to happen and they’re like ‘oh, right. We never told you what the third act was’ (after the San Francisco chase scene). Where are we going to go from here? Then I found out there were a whole two acts after that. We worked on the first act so much to get it right.
:* Reese Witherspoon [http://collider.com/reese-witherspoon-interview-monsters-vs-aliens/ &quot;Reese Witherspoon Interview MONSTERS VS. ALIENS&quot;] by Steve 'Frosty' Weintraub, ''Collider'', January 12, 2009.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|0892782}}

{{Authority control}}

[[dv:Monsters vs. Aliens]]
[[Category:Monsters vs. Aliens (franchise)]]
[[Category:2009 animated films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Animated films about robots]]
[[Category:Animated films about extraterrestrial life]]
[[Category:Films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Films directed by Conrad Vernon]]
[[Category:Films directed by Rob Letterman]]
[[Category:Films about cloning]]
[[Category:Films about size change]]
[[Category:Films about alien invasions]]</text>
      <sha1>mbs7b2b0c0zmtd3owg6so37js2v1khk</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965207</id>
      <parentid>3965205</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:55:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39924-89</username>
        <id>3350191</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965207</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42748" sha1="ml4lsyfv4vpd7pgam7tuubip8lmr33v" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Monsters vs. Aliens}}''''' is a 2009 3D computer-animated film produced by [[w:Dreamworks Animation|DreamWorks Animation]] and distributed by [[w:Universal Pictures|Universal Pictures]]. It tells the story of a young inventor named Susan Murphy, who after being hit by a meteorite, and a near 50-foot height by the foreign element contained within it. She is captured and imprisoned by the government until she and a squad of other imprisoned monsters are called upon to fend off an invading alien attack.

:''Directed by Conrad Vernon and Rob Letterman. Screenplay by Maya Forbes, Wallace Wolodarsky, Rob Letterman, Jonathan Aibel, and Glenn Berger. Story by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon.''

{{center|'''When aliens attack, monsters fight back.''' &lt;small&gt;[[#Taglines|Taglines]]&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Gallaxhar==
* The Omega Quadrant? Lame!
* Extract the Quantonium with extreme prejudice. I want it all. Every last drop!
* Nothing can stand in my way now!
* ''[looking at Susan on a monitor]'' Oh, you think because you're all big and strong, and you can destroy my robot probe, that you're gonna send me running and hiding?! My days of running and hiding are over. Computer set a course to Earth! I will retrieve the Quantonium myself... even if I need to rip it out of her body, one cell at a time!
* ''[Susan tries to escape his forcefield''] Don't bother, that forcefield is impenetrable-- ''[Susan smashes her fist through, nearly hitting Gallaxhar]'' WHAT THE FLAGNOG?!
* ''[telling his life-story; is constantly interrupted by his cloning machine pressing him down]'' Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... No child should ever have to endure that! So I went on the road, with a giant... And soon thereafter was married! Things were going well, until she wanted to... And I was all &quot;No way!&quot;, and she was all &quot;Yes way!&quot;, and I was like... But I've told you too much already!
* Let the birth of my new planet - now called... &quot;Gallaxhar's... Planet&quot; begin!!
* Humans of Earth! I have come in peace. You need not fear me. I mean you no harm. However, it may be important to know that most of you will not survive the next 24 hours. And those of you who do survive will be enslaved and experimented on. You should in no way take any of this personally — it's just business! So, just to recap: I come in peace, I mean you no harm, and you all will die. Gallaxhar out.
* Attention, all aliens! [[Destroy All Monsters|Destroy all monsters]]!
* Uh, Spaceballs! Divert the Quantonium to the bridge, and prepare my escape capsule!
* Attention, robot probes! Crush the earthling!
* Are you crazy?! You could have killed me!
* Like I told you before, you should have defeated me when you had the Quantonium! Have fun exploding!!
* ''[last lines before his death]'' Come on, come on!!!!

== Susan Murphy / Ginormica ==
* ''[as she grows, for the wedding guests flee in terror]'' Wait, wait, everybody! It’s okay! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's gigantic robot probe]'' I can't fight that thing! I can't even...I never...  ''[gasping]'' I'm hyperventilating! Does anybody have a giant paper bag?!
* Three weeks ago, if you had asked me to fight an alien robot, I would have said &quot;No can do!&quot; But I did it! Me! I'm still buzzing! Did you see how strong I was? There's probably not a jar in this world I can't open!
* ''[to her mother, after B.O.B. hugs her and nearly suffocates her in his gelatinous body]'' Sorry, Mom. He's a hugger.
* Doctor, I'd prefer that you didn't do your mad scientist laugh while I'm hooked up to this machine.
* Fresno!! Fresno.... In what universe is Fresno better than Paris, Derek?!
* I wouldn’t be so sure, and the name is Ginormica.
* This is Susan Murphy, saying, &quot;Goodbye, Derek!&quot;

== Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D ==
* ''[to Susan]'' Whatever mad scientist made you... he really went all-out.
* They called me crazy! But I'll show them! I'll show them all! ''[does a classic &quot;mad scientist&quot; laugh]''
* I am not a quack, I am a mad scientist!!!! There's a difference.
* You can't crush a cockroach! ''[laughs maniacally]''
* We all think that the new Susan is the cat's &quot;me-wow&quot;! ''[chuckles for a brief moment; no reaction from anyone else]'' I'm sorry.
* Anyone care for an atomic gin fizz? It's got quite a... ''[the gin explodes]'' ...kick.
* ''[after the ruined party]'' At least the garbage was free.
* ''[to after they rescue her]'' My dear, no matter what your size you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Susan down, shaking her]'' ...Nothing but a filthy carbon based lifeform!
* ''[dancing off against Gallaxhar's computer]'' One thing you don't know about me, my dear! My Ph.D is in... dance!
* By [[Stephen Hawking|Hawking]]'s chair!
* He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.

== The Missing Link ==
* Wow, look at you. I know what you're thinking: first day in prison, you want to take on the toughest guy in the yard? Well, I'd like to see you try.
* ''[lifting weights]'' Seven, eight... ''[notices Susan]'' Uh, 999, 1,000. Phew! I can not believe I did ten sets!
* ''[walking outside for the first time in decades]'' It's a little hotter than I remember. Has the Earth gotten warmer? That'd be great to know, it would be a very [[w:An Inconvenient Truth|convenient truth]].
* Finally some action! I'm gonna turn this over-sized tin can into a... really dented over-sized tin can...
* Re-lax. Old Link's got this all under control.
* ''[swims through the sewers, as he gets out he bangs his head on the lid]'' OW!! ''[he slowly removes the lid and climbs out]'' Yep, that hurt... ''[is suddenly hit by Dr. Cockroach's rocket-powered trolley car]''
* Does anybody have a 20 on Insectosaurus?
* Papa's a little outta shape.
* You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here.
* ''[at Susan's party, Link turns on some music and tries to mingle]'' How's it going? Que pasa, Girlfriend? Way to cut up a rug, Insecto! ''[Insectosaurus is slowly bouncing around]''
* Who wants to go for a swim with the Link?
* ''[emerges from a swimming pool, walking in a zombie-like manner and scaring people, screaming in pain]'' OOOOOOOOW!!!! CHLORINE!!!! '''CHLORINE!!! ''CHLORINE IN MY EYES!!!'''''
* Uh, who are we kidding? We could save every city on the planet, and they'd still treat us like they've always treated us... like ''monsters''.
* No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
* Yeah.. in that very chair. He’s still there.

== B.O.B ==
* ''[on brains and his lack of one]'' Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!
* ''[to Gallaxhar's robot probe; making signs to match his words, similar to Gromit from ''The Curse of the Were-Rabbit'']'' Hello! Hi! Howya doin'? Welcome! We are here to destroy you!
* What happened to the &quot;there isn't a jar in the world I can't open&quot; stuff? Wait! Did you find a jar that you couldn't open?! What was in it? Were there pickles in it? Where's the giant jar of pickles?
* ''[to a plate of Jello]'' Hi, I'm Benzoate Ostylezene Bicarbonate, or you can call me B.O.B, which ever's easier. ''[the Jello wobbles slightly]'' Did I come on too strong? I'm sorry, I'm a little rusty, I've been in prison my whole life— Why did I mention ''prison? [slams his fist on the table, making the Jello shake]'' Uh, I didn't mean to scare you! I'm just gonna go... Oh, I feel so stupid!
* ''[to Susan]'' I don't think your parents like me. And I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
* I may not have a brain, gentlemen, but I have an idea.
* That’s not true, the Invisible Man did!
* What are they running away from?
* ''[as the monsters' rather pathetic disguises actually fool Gallaxhar's clones]'' These disguises are da ''bomb''!
* ''[goes between Dr. Cockroach and a Gallaxhar clone]'' You wanna hurt my friends, you'll have to go through me! ''[the Gallaxhar clone punches him in the eye, knocking out both Dr. Cockroach and the clone in the process]'' Oh yeah.
* ''[confronting Derek, as if he were dating him rather than Susan]'' Derek, you are a selfish jerk, and guess what? I've met someone else! She's lime-green, she has 14 little chunks of pineapple inside her, and she is everything I deserve in life! I'm happy now, Derek! Without you! It's over! ''[Holds up the lime green jello he mentions and leaves triumphantly]''
* ''[to Susan, at the end of the movie]'' Wait, wait, wait, wa-wa-wait! You were dating Derek, too?! That two-timing jerk!

== General Warren R. Monger ==
* ''[To Susan, when she asks if her parents even know where she is]'' No, and they never will!  This place is an X-File, wrapped in a cover-up and deep-fried in paranoid conspiracy! There will be zero contact with the outside world. 
* Don't think of this as a prison. Think of it as a hotel that you can never leave, because it's locked from the outside!
* I'm not gonna kid you, Mr. President. These are dark times. The odds are against us. We need a Hail Mary pass! We need raw power! We need... ''[close up on his mouth]'' monsters.
* ''[after a cabinet member protests against his plan]'' You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a [[wedgie]]]''
* ''[seeing Gallaxhar's robot]'' Oo-ee! Now ''that's'' a robot! Try not to damage it too much, monsters. I might take it back to the farm!
* First stop, Modesto! Ginormica, I called your family to tell them you were coming home. I also called the Modesto PD, told 'em not to shoot at ya!
* I'll come get if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead...or late.
* ''[after parachuting to the ground, his copilot is still clinging to him out of fear]'' You can let go of me now, Lieutenant.
* ''[addressing the monsters]'' I've been your warden for close to fifty years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth- ''[salutes the monsters, a sign of respect]''

== President Hathaway ==
* I must approach it alone. This is all about &quot;peaceful communication&quot;.
* Commander! Do something violent!
* So, that's how you wanna play it? Eat lead, alien robot! ''[fires three shots; the robot is heard munching on them]'' Evidently, they eat lead. Huh. ''[to a crowd]'' I am brave! I am a brave President!
* Listen up! I'm not going to go down as the President who was in office when the world came to an end, so somebody think of something, and think of it fast! ''[sips coffee]'' That is a good cup of joe.
* ''[after Monger gives a cabinet member a wedgie]'' Okay! ''[hides behind his chair]'' Stay where you are. General, I propose we go forward with your &quot;monsters vs. aliens&quot; idea... thingy.
* Okay, someone set the terror level to Code Brown, because I need to change my pants!

==Jerry==
* How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist, and we're never gonna see...
* Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! '''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''
* Supernova, this is [[w:Red Dwarf|Red Dwarf]]! We actually have one! Code [[w:Leonard Nimoy|Nimoy]]! I repeat! '''''CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''

==Ben==
* Hey, Jerry, you wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
* Wow, its energy signature is massive.
* Jerry, stop it! Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like... Modesto, California.

== Wendy Murphy ==
*Oh, Carl. It's her wedding day!
* ''[as Bob spits her out]'' I taste ham.
* Uh, honey, ever since you were a little baby, I knew that someday... you would save the world from an alien invasion from outer space.

== Others ==
* '''Wedding Guest''': ''[after Susan grows to her massive height]'' Here comes the bride!
* '''Derek Dietl''': ''[rejecting Susan]'' Don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life in someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow.
* '''TV Reporter''': Once again, a UFO has landed in America - the only country UFOs ever seem to land in!
* '''Announcer''': Channel 172.

== Dialogue ==
:''[first lines during The films begin with the black and white version of DreamWorks Animation logo; then the UFO suddenly flies in from the right arrives, abducts the Moon Boy looks up as it opens the hatch]''
:'''Moon Boy''': ''[while getting abducted]'' Huh? ''[flies away]'' Aaaaah!
:''[The UFO flies away, the camera film starts melting and burning animation transporting to the space scene, beginning the movie. Somewhere in space, a planet explodes, sending a glowing meteorite colliding down the vast space and heading to the direction of Earth. The Technicians Ben and Jerry are working in the Antarctic outpost, with Jerry on one of the computers and Ben at his desk, playing with a paddleball while &quot;When You See Those Flying Saucers&quot; by [[w:Buchanan Brothers|Buchanan Brothers]] playing on the radio. His [[w:HP Inc.|HP]] laptop goes off and types something down, and while at it, puts down his paddleball and turns off his radio.]''
:'''Ben''': Hey, Jerry. You might wanna check this one out. Uh, Palomar just picked up... Looks like some type of UFO and it's heading this way.
:'''Jerry''': How many times do I have to tell you this? UFOs don't exist. And we're never gonna see.
:'''Ben''': Wow, it's energy signiture is massive.
:'''Jerry''': Holy Cheez-Its! What do we do?! No one ever told us what to do! &lt;big&gt;'''''THE ONLY REASON I TOOK THIS JOB IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Ben''': Jerry, stop it! ''[locates the map]'' Let me calculate its impact point. Looks like.....Modesto, California.
:'''Jerry''': ''[picks up the phone]'' Supernova, this is Red Dwarf! We actually have one!  &lt;big&gt;'''''CODE NIMOY! I REPEAT, CODE NIMOY!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Scene cuts to Panning down to her parents' house and inside, Susan, an inventor Girl was sleeping in her bed. She reached in for the light turns on her lamp and opened up her eyes with her scream.]'' 
:'''Susan''': ''[screaming]'' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Bridesmaids''': '''''AAHHH!!!!!'''''
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': [''wheezing'']
:''[The slurping came from one of them drinking coffee; and the flashes came from the third one taking pictures.]''
:'''Susan''': What are you guys doing here? It's 5 o'clock in the morning.
:'''Bridesmaid 1''': Hurry, turn on the TV! Turn it on now!
:''[Susan turns on the TV is set up on the other side of the room where Derek speaks, as Susan and her bridesmaids watch.]
:'''Derek''': And some early morning fog, giving way to sunny skies. Seventy-five degrees. A perfect day to stop by the old folk art and craft show down at the fairgrounds, or a perfect day to marry Susan Murphy.
:''[Susan moves closer to the TV as Derek makes a heart with his hands.]''
:'''Derek''': I love you, baby.
:'''Susan''': I love you, too.
:'''Bridesmaids''': Aww.
:'''Woman''': Aww.
:'''Derek''': And good morning, Modesto!
:'''News Technician''': Channel 172.
:''[Susan and two of her bridesmaids pose for a picture together]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Dietl''': One thumb's shorter than the other. It runs in the family.
:'''Susan''': Derek doesn't have that?
:'''Mama Dietl''': Ah, it skips a generation. But your kids are gonna have it! ''[laughs maniacally]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wendy''': ''[calling for Susan and looking for her]'' '''''SUSAN!''''' Where could she be? '''''SUSAN! WHERE ARE YOU?!''''' ''[sees her daughter walking up the hill, with her wedding dress a little dirty]'' Susan! Where have you been?
:'''Susan''': I think I just got hit by a meteorite.
:'''Wendy''': Oh, Susan. Every bride feels that way on her wedding day. ''[brings her daughter into the church]'' My goodness, look at you. You're filthy. Thank Gosh I have wet ones.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': ''[gasps at Susan's appearance]'' Wow. You're… glowing.
:'''Susan''': ''[unaware that she is glowing green; sweetly]'' Thank you.
:'''Derek''': No. No, Susan, you're, like, really glowing. You're ''green!''
:'''Susan''': ''[looks at her glowing left arm and gasps]'' Oh, no! ''[suddenly starts growing with her hair turning white and getting scared of Derek.]'' ''[scared]'' '''DEREK!'''
:''[Everyone in the church watches her &quot;growth spurt&quot;.]''
:'''Wendy''': ''[horrifyingly shocked]'' Oh, my gosh!
:'''Derek''': What is going on?! What is happening here?!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' You're all shrinking!
:'''Derek''': Uh-uh! You're growing!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' Well, make it stop!
:'''Priest''': Get me the Government! ''[jumps through the window]''
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' This is Impossible! No, This can't be happening. ''[The woman screams and all the people run away from the growing bride]'' 
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' Wait, wait. Everybody, It's OK! Have some champagne while we're figuring this out!
:'''Mama Dietl''': ''[trying to open the door and escape]'' Thumbs! Thumbs!
:'''Susan''': ''[scared]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''DEREK! HELP ME!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[about B.O.B.]'' Forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain.
:'''B.O.B.''': Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated!! As a matter of fact, I don't even have to... ''[starts gasping for air] I FORGOT HOW TO BREATHE, DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREATHE! HELP ME, DR. COCKROACH!''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[exasperated]'' Suck in, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[breathes normally]'' Thanks, Doc. You're a lifesaver.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': She's speechless!
:'''B.O.B.''': &quot;She&quot;?!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Yes, B.O.B., we are in the presence of a rare female monster.
:'''B.O.B.''': No way, it's a boy! Look at his boobies!
:''[awkward silence]''
:'''Missing Link''': We need to have a talk.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Gentlemen, I'm afraid we're not making a very good first impression.
:'''Missing Link''': Well, at least I'm talking! First new monster in years, and we couldn't get, like, a wolfman or a mummy? You know, someone I can play cards with.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Might we ask for your name, madam?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': No, no, no, we mean your ''monster'' name. What do people scream when they see you coming? You know, like &quot;Look out! Here comes...&quot;?
:'''Susan''': Susan.
:''[silence]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Really?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[spookily]'' Susan! Ooh, I just scared myself! That is scary!
:'''Missing Link''': Yes. Eat time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Oh, please, Guys, tell me this isn't real. Please tell me I had a nervous breakdown at the wedding, and now I'm in a mental hospital on medication that's giving me hallucinations.
:''[she backs up slowly, but touches something hairy behind and looks up. Insectosaurus roars, Susan screams in terror and runs.]''
:'''Missing Link''': Don't scare Insectosaurus! He's gonna pee himself, then we'll all be in trouble.
:'''Susan''': ''[runs to the gate]'' EVERY ROOM HAS A DOOR?! ''[pounds the gate]'' There's gotta be a door here!! Where's the door?!?!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[petting Insectosaurus]'' It's OK, buddy. Don't worry about it. Who's a handsome bug, huh? You like it when I rub your tummy?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicking]''  Please! Somebody! (Help!) I DON’T BELONG HERE! &lt;big
&gt;'''''LET ME OUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': Hey, hey, that is not a good idea.
:''[the cell door opens, two red lights shown from the dark. It emerges from there is General W.R. Monger, who has a strapped jet pack.]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Monsters, get back in your cells.
:''[Dr. Cockroach, BOB, and Missing Link get back in their respective cells, a chopper lures Insectosaurus into his cell with huge lights]''
:'''Susan''': ''[meeting General Monger]'' Uh, thank goodness! A real person! ''[notices his jetpack]'' You are a real person, right? You're not one of those half-person, half-machine, whatever you call those things?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': A [[w:cyborg|cyborg]]?
:'''Susan''': ''[panicked]'' Oh, no! '''YOU ARE A CYBORG!'''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Young lady, I can assure you I am not a cyborg. The name is General Warren R. Monger. I'm in charge of this facility. ''[turns around]'' Now follow me. It is time for your orientation.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Dr. Cockroach is building an atomic bomb from Legos]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Uh, Susan. You wouldn't happen to have some uranium on you? I just need a smidge.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': ''[on walkie-talkie]'' Rescind Dr. Cockroach's toybox privileges. Immediately. ''[Susan's cell door opens]'' We’ve had the prison psychologist redecorate your cell. ''[a poster reads “Hang in there!]'' Try to keep you all calm-like.
:'''Susan''': ''[crying]'' But I don’t want a poster. I want a real kitten. Hanging from a real tree. ''[turns to General W. R. Monger]'' I wanna go home...
:'''General W.R. Monger ''': Uh, come on, Little Debbie, please don’t cry. It makes my knees hurt. Don’t think of this as a prison! Think of it as a hotel you never leave because it’s locked from the outside! ''[Susan goes in her cell]'' Oh! And, uh, one other thing, the government has changed your name to Ginormica!
:''[Susan slowly backs into a corner, sits down and sadly curls up in a fetal position]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cuthbert''': Don't rush me, Katie; I'm just not ready.
:'''Katie''': Oh, relax, Cuthbert, it's just like dancing. I'll lead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[President Hathaway goes to push a huge red button; all the advisers shout for him to not to]''
:'''Adviser Cole''': That button launches all of our nuclear missiles!
:'''President Hathaway''': Well, then which button gets me a latte?!
:'''Adviser Wedgie''': Err, that would be the ''other'' one, sir.
:''[the camera zips back to show an identical button next to the first one; the President pushes it and serves himself a cup of coffee]''
:'''President Hathaway''': What idiot designed this thing? ''[stares around accusingly]''
:'''Wilson''': You did, sir.
:'''President Hathaway''': Fair enough. Wilson, fire somebody!
:'''Wilson''': ''[off-screen]'' Yes, sir, Mr. President.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[General Monger explains his private operation to the government, showing images and video clips along the way]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Over the last 50 years, I have captured monsters on the rampage and locked them up in a secret prison facility. So secret, that the mere mention of its name is a federal offense!
:'''Advisor''': Is he referring to Area Fifty- ''[is shot in the neck with a tranquilizer dart and falls over]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Mr. President, say hello to Insectosaurus! ''[shows a tape of Insectosaurus going on a rampage in Tokyo. An aide drops a tray of china and screams.]'' Miss Ronson, please. Nuclear radiation turned him from a small grub into [[w:kaiju|a 350-foot tall monster that attacked Tokyo]]. Here we have the Missing Link... ''[Miss Ronson drops another tray of china and screams again.]'' ...A 20,000-year-old frozen fish-man who was thawed out by scientists. ''[shows a clip of the Missing Link's escape]'' He escaped and went on a rampage at his old watering hole... ''[shows a tape of the Missing Link on the beach in Florida]'' This handsome fellow is Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D, the most brilliant man in the world. He invented a scientific machine that would give humans the cockroach's ability to survive. ''[shows a black-and-white clip of Dr. Cockroach undergoing the experiment, giving himself his cockroach head]'' Unfortunately, there was a side-effect.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and drops another tray of china off-screen; Monger groans]'' Now, we call this thing B.O.B.... ''[Miss Ronson screams and dropped the tray of china off-screen again.] '''WILL SOMEONE GET HER OUT OF HERE?!?!''' [Two people throw Miss Ronson out of the room off-screen.]'' Thank you! A genetically-altered tomato was combined with a chemically altered ranch-flavored dessert topping at a snack food plant. The resulting goop gained consciousness and became an indestructible gelatinous mass. And our latest addition, Ginormica.
:''[He shows a picture of Susan at her failed wedding. Miss Ronson’s scream and the crash is heard, and it turns out to be the President's.]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[clears his throat]'' (Sorry about that.) General, continue.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Her entire body radiates with pure energy, giving her enormous strength and size. Sir, these monsters are our best and only chance to defeat that robot.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Don't we already have an alien problem, General? I don't think we need a monster problem too.
:'''General W.R. Monger''': You got a better idea, Nerd? ''[gives him a wedgie]''
:''[board members in shock, even the President]''
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[stands up]'' Okay, stay where you are. ''[clears throat]'' General, I propose we go forward with your Monsters vs Aliens idea...thingy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Missing Link''': You really don’t get it, do you? No monster has ever gotten out of here!
:'''B.O.B''': That’s not true, the Invisible Man did.
:'''Missing Link''': No, he didn’t, we just told you that so you won’t get upset.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': He died of a heart attack 25 years ago.
:'''B.O.B''': NOOO! 
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah…in that very chair.
:''[the camera pans to a chair in the very corner]''
:'''Missing Link''': He’s still there.
:''[B.O.B begins to weep quietly]''
:'''Missing Link''': You see what I’m saying? Nobody’s leaving, nobody’s ever getting out!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Great news, monsters, you’re getting out.
:'''Missing Link''': Until today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after being promised their freedom if they defeat Gallaxhar's robot]''
:'''Susan''': Soon I'll be back in Derek's arms... or he'll be in mine.
:'''Missing Link''': I can't wait for spring break back at Cocoa Beach, just freaking everybody out.
:'''B.O.B.''': And I'll go back to my lab and finally finish my experiments.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, that's ''me'', B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Then I'll be a really giant lady.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': That's Susan, B.O.B.
:'''B.O.B.''': Fine. Then I'll go back to Modesto and be with Derek.
:'''Missing Link''': That's still Susan.
:'''B.O.B.''': I think I at least deserve a chance to be with Derek!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[the robot steps toward them]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! Will you look at the size of that-
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': ''[pointing]'' '''FOOT!!!!'''
:''[Cockroach and Link dive out of the way and the robot's foot steps on B.O.B., then comes up, with B.O.B. stuck to the sole.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': I got him, you guys! I got-! ''[step]'' Don't worry, I won't let go! I'm wearing him down- ''[step]'' Please tell me he's slowing down!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Get to the city, Link. I'll catch up as soon as I can. ''[sees the train on truck]'' Or maybe you'll have to catch up with me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Susan fights Gallaxhar's robot, while preventing bystanders' cars from falling off the bridge.]''
:'''B.O.B.''': Wow! ''[two thumbs up]'' You're doing great!
:'''Susan''': ''[extremely annoyed]'' I'm doing everything!
:'''Missing Link''': Not for long! C'mon you guys, let's take this thing down! ''[runs into a deflector shield]''
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': A deflector shield. Typical. ''[Missing Link faints]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Derek''': Wow! You really are big. 
:'''Susan''': Yeah, but I'm still me. I'm still the girl you fell in love with.
:'''Derek''': Except you did just destroy the Golden Gate Bridge.
:'''Susan''': But that was the only way I could stop that giant robot! Did you ever think I could do that?!
:'''Derek''': No, I didn't. I can honestly say that it never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever occurred to me!
:'''Susan''': Look, I know this is a little weird - okay, it's a lot weird - but we'll figure it out. I know that together we can find a way to get me back to normal.
:'''Derek''': Susan, try to look at this from my perspective. I have an audience that depends on me for news, weather, sports and heart-warming fluff pieces. So you expect me to put all that on hold while you try to undo this thing that happened to you, that I had absolutely nothing to do with?
:'''Susan''': Yes, that's exactly what I expect. What about the life we always talked about? Don't you still want that?
:'''Derek''': Of course. I just...don't see how I can have that with you.
:'''Susan''': ''[On the verge of tears]'' Derek, please. Don't do this.
:'''Derek''': You have to face facts, Susan. And don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life on someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow. ''[heads to the door]'' I'm sorry. It's over. Good luck, Susan. ''[leaves]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Wow, what a shindig! Your parents really know how to throw it down. ''[taps at Missing Link]''
:'''Missing Link''': What? No, that was a great party. One of the best I've been to since I got out of prison.
:'''B.O.B.''': I must've been at a different party 'cause that's not how I interpreted it at all. I don't think your parents like me, and I think that Jello gave me a fake phone number.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Well, at least the garbage was free, you know. ''[stammers]''
:'''Missing Link''': Ah, who are we kidding? We cound save every city on the planet and they'd still treat us the same way they've always treated us: like monsters.
:'''Susan''': Right. Monsters.
:'''Missing Link''': Anyway, how, uh, how is Derek?
:'''Susan''': ''[pause, then sighs]'' Derek's a selfish jerk.
:'''B.O.B.''': No!
:'''Susan''': Yes. All that talk about us - &quot;I'm so proud of us&quot;, &quot;Us just got a job in Fresno&quot; - There was no us, it was just Derek. Why did I have to get hit by a meteor to see that? I was such an idiot! ''[kicks the roof of the gas station, sending B.O.B. flying]'' Why did I think life with Derek would be so great anyway?! I mean, look at all the stuff I've done without him. Fighting an alien robot? That was me, not him! And that was amazing! Meeting you guys... ''[gets down on her knees so she can be face-to-face with the other monsters]'' ...amazing. ''[turns to Dr. Cockroach]'' Dr. Cockroach! You can crawl up walls and build a super-computer out of a pizza box, two cans of hairspray, and-!
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And a paper clip!
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[turns to Missing Link]'' And you! You hardly need an introduction; you're the Missing Link! You personally carried 250 co-eds off Cocoa Beach and still had the strength to fight off the National Guard!
:'''Missing Link''': ''[proudly]'' And the Coast Guard! And also the lifeguard.
:'''Susan''': Amazing! ''[B.O.B. lands next to the other monsters.]'' B.O.B.! ''[turns him around so he's facing her]'' Who else could fall from unimaginable heights and end up without a single scratch?
:'''B.O.B.''': ''[points to Missing Link]'' Link?
:'''Susan''': ''[correcting him]'' You.
:'''B.O.B.''': Amazing!
:''[Insectosaurus roars]''
:'''Missing Link''': Good point, Insecto! Susan, don't shortchange yourself.
:'''Susan''': Uh, I'm not gonna shortchange myself. ''[stands at full height again]'' Ever again.
:'''B.O.B.''': Testify!
:'''Missing Link''': Yeah.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Oh, yes.
:''[a tractor beam picks up Susan]''
:'''Missing Link''': SUSAN!
:''[Insecto shoots out silk from his nose at Susan who grabs hold]''
:'''Missing Link''': Way to go, Insecto!
:''[Gallaxhar angrily hits a button and a phasoid cannon fires at Insecto]''
:'''Missing Link''': INSECTO, LOOK OUT!
:''[after Insectosaurus is shot by one of Gallaxhar's ship's cannons]''
:'''Susan''': INSECTOSAURUS!! '''''NO!!!!!!'''''
:''[Missing Link approaches the dying Insectosaurus]''
:'''Missing Link''': You're gonna make it. It's gonna be alright. Look at me! Don't you close those eyes. Don't you dare close those eyes! ''[Insectosaurus slowly closes his eyes]'' You can't...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Ginormica wakes up in Gallaxhar's ship, wearing a different, skin-tight suit. She gazes around at the scenery of the ship in a room full of giant robot probes similar to the one she and her friends fought earlier. She stands up to explore the ship, but before she could do so, she is imprisoned inside a pink laser cage machine, and she tries touching the pink energy, but she gets zapped. She then hears Gallaxhar's laugh as he approaches her]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': You must be terrified. You wake up in a ''strange'' place, wearing ''strange'' clothes, imprisoned by a ''strange'' being on a ''strange'' hovering device? ''Strange'', isn't it?
:'''Susan''': Hardly. It's not the first time.
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[pauses, deflated]'' Wow. You really get around. To the extraction chamber!
:''[the machine imprisoning Ginormica begins to follow Gallaxhar through the ship]''
:'''Susan''': Look, what is it that you want from me?
:'''Gallaxhar''': You have stolen what is rightfully mine!
:'''Susan''':  I didn't steal anything from you! (What are you talking about?)
:'''Gallaxhar''': Your enormous, ''grotesque'' body contains Quantonium, the most powerful substance in the universe. Did you really think you could keep it from me?
:'''Susan''': That's what this is all about?! You destroyed San Francisco, you terrified millions of people, you killed my friend, just to get to me?!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! Silence! Your voice is grating on my ear nubs. It's a shame you won't be around to see what the power of Quantonium can do IN THE TENTACLES OF SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!!
:'''Susan''': I know how to use it just FINE! ''[punches the force field]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Don't bother. That force field is impenetrab-- ''[she manages to break through the force field to get to Gallaxhar]'' What the flagnard!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Gallaxhar''': ''[after extracting the Quantonium from Ginormica, shrinking her back to human-size]'' Now I can finally rebuild my civilization on a new planet! Any ideas on where I could set up shop? ''Your'' planet, perhaps?
:'''Susan''': You keep your slimy tentacles off my planet--! ''[tries to attack him, but he holds her back at tentacle-length]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Or what? If you wanted to stop me, you should have done it when you possessed the Quantonium. Now you're nothing.
:'''Susan''': There are innocent people down there who haven't done anything!
:'''Gallaxhar''': There were innocent people on ''my'' home planet, before it was destroyed!
:'''Susan''': Look, I'm sorry your planet was destroyed—
:'''Gallaxhar''': Uh, don't be! I'm the one who destroyed it. Confused? After I reveal my tale to you, everything will become crystal clear. Computer, initialize cloning machine!
:'''Gallaxhar's Computer''': Yes, Gallaxhar.
:''[Gallaxhar gets into the cloning machine with a mold that matches his body]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... ''[the machine closes down, scans his body and opens up again]'' No child should ever have to endure that!! So I went on the road with a giant... ''[the machine closes down again and scans his body and opens up once again]'' ...And then thereafter was married! Things were going well. Until ''she'' wanted... ''[the machine closes down a third time and opens up]'' So then, I was all, &quot;No way!&quot; And then she was all, &quot;Yes way!&quot; And then I was like... ''[the machine closes down a fourth time and opens up]'' But I told you too much already! ''[steps out of the machine]'' Let the birth of my new planet called... Uh... Gallaxhar's Planet, begin!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Alright, gentlemen, you got enough juice in those jetpacks to get you up there, but not enough to make it home. I'll come get you if I can. If I don't, it means I'm dead... ''[Dr. Cockroach is in shock]'' ...or late. ''[Dr. Cockroach is mildly relieved]'' I've been your warden for close to 50 years, but that's no longer the case. For what it's worth... ''[salutes]''
:'''BOB''': ''[offended]'' That's rude! What did we do?
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': No, BOB, that's not rude. That's a sign of respect.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Gallaxhar addresses his army of clones]''
:'''Gallaxhar''': Clone!
:'''All Gallaxhar clones''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': No, no, no, not all of you, you there! ''[The clones look confused]'' Erm, how do I do this? Three back! ''[The clones move around confused]'' No, no, no, no, that guy... Next to you... The one I'm pointing at! You! The one! Ya-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka! You! Clone, yes! Good! ''[One steps forward]'' Take the prisoner to the incinerator! She's useless to us now.
:'''Gallaxhar Clone''': Hail Gallaxar!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Hail me...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': I can't believe you guys came to save me. Thank you.
:'''Missing Link''': Don't mention it. We monsters gotta stick together.
:'''Susan''': But I'm not a monster anymore. I'm just me.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': My dear, no matter what your size, you'll always be... ''[notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Ginormica down by the suit, shaking her]'' nothing but a filthy carbon-based lifeform!
:'''Gallaxhar Clones''': Hail Gallaxar.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': Hail Gallaxar.
:''[the Gallaxhar clones walk away]''
:'''BOB''': These disguises are the BOMB!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Susan''': Now open the doors!
:'''Gallaxhar''': Even if I wanted to, I couldn't! That's what happens when you set a ship to self-destruct! Now we're all gonna die!! And there's nothing you can do about it, Susan!!
:'''Susan''': I wouldn't be so sure. And the name... is Ginormica! ''[fires the weapon she is carrying into the statue, so that the Quantonium-filled globe it holds falls on her, restoring her giant size and strength]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[thinking they are about to die (B.O.B., as usual, is blissfully unaware)]''
:'''Missing Link''': It's been an honor knowing you, Doc.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': The feeling's mutual, my friend.
:'''B.O.B.''': I'll see you guys tomorrow, for lunch!
:'''Missing Link''': That's right, B.O.B.
:'''Dr. Cockroach''': And they'll be ice-cream and cake and balloons.
:'''B.O.B.''': Cake and balloons for lunch?! It's gonna be the best day ever! I love you guys!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines; cut-scene just after the first cluster of credits]''
:'''President Hathaway''': Everyone, let's welcome my new Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Of Staff, General W.R. Monger!
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Thank you, Mr. President. What a great way to celebrate my 90th birthday.
:'''President Hathaway''': Very good, Warren. All right. '''''Let's get it started in here!''''' Nerd.
:'''Nerd Advisor''': Gentlemen, I have assembled a preliminary budget estimate for rebuilding San Francisco.
:'''President Hathaway''': Zoinkers? This is going to be a boring one. Good time for a cup of Joe. Warden, how do you take it?
:'''General W.R. Monger''': Hit me with a double Venti, organic chocolate brownie Caramel Frappichino, extra hot with one inch of foam... ''[zooms in to his lips]'' ..Non-fat.
:'''President Hathaway''': You got it, black it is. ''[this time, he hits the nuke button; everyone panics]''
:'''General W.R. Monger''': &lt;big&gt;'''''MY GOD-MAN!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''President Hathaway''': ''[nonetheless still his cheerful self]'' Time to wave the white flag and head for the bunker, boys! Let's check the situation in 500 years. ''[pops his head into the audience]'' Who wants to freeze my head? ''[puts his eyeglasses up]''

== Taglines ==
* Alien problem? Monster solution.
* When aliens attack, monsters fight back
* Ooze gonna save us?
* When aliens attack, these guys got your back.
* Saving the day the monster way.

==Cast==
===Monsters===
* [[Will Arnett]] — The Missing Link
* [[w:Seth Rogen|Seth Rogen]] — B.O.B.
* [[Hugh Laurie]] — Dr. Cockroach, PhD
* [[Frank Welker]] — Insectosaurus

===Aliens===
* [[Rainn Wilson]] — Gallaxhar
* [[Amy Poehler]] — Gallaxhar's Computer

===Humans===
* [[Reese Witherspoon]] — Susan Murphy/Ginormica
* [[Kiefer Sutherland]] — General Warren R. Monger
* [[Stephen Colbert]] — President Hathaway 
* [[w:Paul Rudd|Paul Rudd]] — Derek Dietl
* [[w:Jeffrey Tambor|Jeffrey Tambor]] — Carl Murphy
* [[w:Julie White|Julie White]] — Wendy Murphy
* [[w:John Krasinski|John Krasinski]] — Cuthbert
* [[w:Ed Helms|Ed Helms]] — News Reporter
* [[w:Bridget Hoffman|Bridget Hoffman]] — Girl Screaming In The Car
* [[w:Anne Lockhart|Anne Lockhart]] — Girl Screaming In The Car

===Additional Voice===
* [[w:Jeffrey Katzenberg|Jeffrey Katzenberg]] — Moon Boy

== About ''Monsters vs. Aliens'' ==
* I think the main thing, for me, was finding a female character that I felt like really spoke to young women and that was really important to me. I didn’t want to be somebody’s girlfriend. Not to say that those roles aren’t as good but I loved the idea of this character being pro-active and driving her own story, changing her own life through her own will. That’s such a great message for young women and I’m so excited to be doing that and also, it brings the energy to the party. I’d go in there with such enthusiasm and excitement to be a part of something like that.
* There were definitely some disorienting moments where I had no idea what was going to happen with her. I remember one day I came in and we’d had like ten recording sessions and I said ‘how does this movie end? Do I die?’ I didn’t know what was going to happen and they’re like ‘oh, right. We never told you what the third act was’ (after the San Francisco chase scene). Where are we going to go from here? Then I found out there were a whole two acts after that. We worked on the first act so much to get it right.
:* Reese Witherspoon [http://collider.com/reese-witherspoon-interview-monsters-vs-aliens/ &quot;Reese Witherspoon Interview MONSTERS VS. ALIENS&quot;] by Steve 'Frosty' Weintraub, ''Collider'', January 12, 2009.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|0892782}}

{{Authority control}}

[[dv:Monsters vs. Aliens]]
[[Category:Monsters vs. Aliens (franchise)]]
[[Category:2009 animated films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Animated films about robots]]
[[Category:Animated films about extraterrestrial life]]
[[Category:Films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Films directed by Conrad Vernon]]
[[Category:Films directed by Rob Letterman]]
[[Category:Films about cloning]]
[[Category:Films about size change]]
[[Category:Films about alien invasions]]</text>
      <sha1>ml4lsyfv4vpd7pgam7tuubip8lmr33v</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Inglourious Basterds</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>107833</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965020</id>
      <parentid>3924212</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:50:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Azn1771153</username>
        <id>3300815</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965020</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="25632" sha1="6qd0qpbz2fwyaan6n6faug3faa6ilo8" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:SDCC 2012 - Inglourious Basterds (7560445058).jpg|thumb|We're gonna be dropped into France, dressed as civilians. And once we're in enemy territory, as a bushwackin' guerrilla army, we're gonna be doing one thang and one thang only … killin' [[Nazism|Nazis]]. Now, I don't know about y'all, but I sure as hell didn't come down from the goddamn Smoky Mountains, cross five thousand miles of water, fight my way through half of Sicily and jump out of a fuckin' aer-o-plane to teach the Nazis lessons in humanity. Nazi ain't got no humanity. They're the foot soldiers of a Jew-hatin', mass murderin' maniac, and they need to be dee-stroyed. That's why any and every sumbitch we find wearin' a Nazi uniform, they're gonna die.]]
[[File:Alvin.jpg|thumb|That's Sgt. Donny Donowitz. You might know him better by his nickname: the Bear Jew.]]
[[File:ChristophWaltzCannesMay09.jpg|thumb|I love rumors! Facts can be so misleading, but rumors, true or false, are often revealing.]]
[[File:Mélanie Laurent César 2016 (cropped).jpg|thumb|My name is Shosanna Dreyfus, and this is the face of [[Judaism|Jewish]] vengeance!]]
[[File:Bowie Knife by Tim Lively 16.jpg|thumb|I'm gonna give you something you ''can't'' take off.]]
'''''[[w:Inglourious Basterds|Inglourious Basterds]]''''' is a [[w:2009 in film|2009 film]] about a team of Jewish-American commandos operating in [[w:Nazi-occupied France|Nazi-occupied France]] during [[World War II]].
: ''Written and directed by [[Quentin Tarantino]].''
{{center|'''Once upon a time in Nazi occupied France…'''&lt;small&gt;[[#Taglines|taglines]]&lt;/small&gt;}}

== Lt. Aldo Raine ==
[[File:Jackson (2).jpg|thumb|right|Well, you don't gotta be Stonewall Jackson to know you don't wanna fight in a basement.]]
* Well, you don't gotta be [[Stonewall Jackson]] to know you don't wanna fight in a basement.
* ''[after carving a swastika into Landa's forehead]'' You know somethin', Utivich? I think this just might be my masterpiece.

== Col. Hans Landa ==
* Tell me, Aldo. If I were sitting where you're sitting, would you show me mercy?

== Shosanna Dreyfus ==
* ''[spliced into the movie after Zoller asks &quot;Who has a message for Germany?&quot;]'' I have a message for [[W:Nazi Germany|Germany]]. That you are all going to die. And I want you to look deep into the face of the Jew who's going to do it! Marcel, burn it down! My name is Shosanna Dreyfus, and this is the face of [[Judaism|Jewish]] vengeance!

== Dialogue ==
[[File:SS-Standartenführer Collar Rank.svg|thumb|The feature that makes me such an effective hunter of the Jews is, as opposed to most [[W:Wehrmacht|German soldiers]], I can ''think'' like a Jew, where they can only think like a German — more precisely: German soldier. ]]
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': Now, according to these papers, all the Jewish families in this area have been accounted for, except the Dreyfuses. Somewhere in the last year it would appear they've vanished, which leads me to the conclusion that they've either made good their escape, or someone is very successfully hiding them. What have you heard about the Dreyfuses, Monsieur LaPadite?
:'''Perrier LaPadite''': Only rumors.
:'''Landa''': I love rumors! Facts can be so misleading, but rumors, true or false, are often revealing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': The feature that makes me such an effective hunter of the Jews is, as opposed to most [[W:Wehrmacht|German soldiers]], I can ''think'' like a Jew, where they can only think like a German — more precisely: German soldier. Now, if one were to determine what attribute the German people share with a beast, it would be the cunning and the predatory instinct of a hawk. But if one were to determine what attributes the Jews share with a beast, it would be that of the rat. The Führer and Goebbels's propaganda have said pretty much the same thing, but where our conclusions differ is: ''I'' don't consider the comparison an insult. Consider, for a moment, the world a rat lives in. It's a hostile world, indeed. If a rat were to scamper through your front door right now, would you greet it with hostility?
:'''Perrier LaPadite''': I suppose I would.
:'''Landa''': Has a rat ever done anything to you to create this animosity you feel towards them?
:'''LaPadite''': Rats spread diseases. They bite people.
:'''Landa''': Rats were the cause of [[w:Black Death|the bubonic plague]], but that's some time ago. I propose to you, any disease a rat could spread, a squirrel could equally carry. Would you agree?
:'''LaPadite''': ''Oui''.
:'''Landa''': Yet I assume you don't share the same animosity with squirrels that you do with rats, do you?
:'''LaPadite''': No.
:'''Landa''': But they're both rodents, are they not? And except for the tail, they even rather look alike, don't they?
:'''LaPadite''': It's an interesting thought, Herr Colonel.
:'''Landa''': Ha! However interesting as the thought may be, it makes not one bit of difference to how you feel. If a rat were to walk in here right now, as I'm talking, would you greet it with a saucer of your delicious milk?
:'''LaPadite''': Probably not.
:'''Landa''': I didn't think so. You don't like them. You don't really know why you don't like them. All you know is you find them repulsive. Consequently, a German soldier conducts a search of a house suspected of hiding Jews: where does the hawk look? He looks in the barn. He looks in the attic. He looks in the cellar. He looks everywhere ''he'' would hide, but there's so many places it would never occur to a hawk to hide. However, the reason the Führer has brought me off my Alps in Austria and placed me in French cow country today is because it does occur to me, because I'm aware what tremendous feats human beings are capable of once they abandon dignity.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot; /&gt;
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': ''[as he lights his pipe]'' Now, my job dictates that I must have my men enter your home and conduct a thorough search before I can officially cross your family's name off my list, and if there are any irregularities to be found, rest assured they will be — that is, unless you have something to tell me that makes the conducting of a search unnecessary. I might add, also, that any information that makes the performance of my duties easier will not be met with punishment. Actually, quite the contrary, it will be met with reward, and that reward will be your family will cease to be harassed in any way by the German military during the rest of our occupation of your country. ''[long pause, while he stares hard at LaPadite, his smile slowly drops to a more stern look]'' You are sheltering enemies of the state, are you not?
:'''Perrier LaPadite''': Yes.
:'''Landa''': You're sheltering them underneath your floorboards, aren't you?
:'''LaPadite''': ''[Tearfully]'' Yes.
:'''Landa''': Point out to me the areas where they are hiding. ''[LaPadite points. Landa rises and walks to where he pointed, gesturing with his pipe while LaPadite nods to confirm]'' Since I haven't heard any disturbance, I assume that while they're listening, they don't speak English.
:'''LaPadite''': Yes.
:'''Landa''': I'm going to switch back to French now. I want you to follow my masquerade. Is that clear?
:'''LaPadite''': Yes.
:'''Landa''': ''[In French]'' Monsieur LaPadite, I thank you for the milk and your hospitality. I do believe our business here is done. ''[Opens the door and lets [[w:Schutzstaffel|SS soldiers]] in]'' Ah, ladies. I thank you for your time. We shan't be bothering your family any longer. So, ''Monsieur, Mademoiselle'', I bid farewell to you and say; ''adieu''! ''[Soldiers shoot up the floorboards with sole survivor Shoshanna running off in distance with Landa pointing his [[w:Walther P38|Walther pistol]] at her, only to lower it] Au revoir,'' Shosanna!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot; /&gt;
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': Ten-hut! My name is Lt. Aldo Raine and I'm puttin' together a special team; and I need me eight soldiers. Eight Jewish-American soldiers. Now, y'all might heard rumors about the armada happening soon. Well, we'll be leaving a little earlier. We're gonna be dropped into France, dressed as civilians. And once we're in enemy territory, as a bushwackin' guerrilla army, we're gonna be doing one thang and one thang only … killin' [[Nazism|Nazis]]. Now, I don't know about y'all, but I sure as hell didn't come down from the goddamn [[W:Smoky Mountains|Smoky Mountains]], cross five thousand miles of water, fight my way through half of Sicily and jump out of a fuckin' aer-o-plane to teach the Nazis lessons in humanity. Nazi ain't got no humanity. They're the foot soldiers of a Jew-hatin', mass murderin' maniac, and they need to be dee-stroyed. That's why any and every sumbitch we find wearin' a Nazi uniform, they're gonna die. Now, I am the direct descendant of the mountain man [[w:Jim Bridger|Jim Bridger]], and that means I got a little Injun in me. And our battle plan will be that of an Apache resistance. We will be cruel to the Germans, and through our cruelty they will know who we are. And they will find the evidence of our cruelty in the disemboweled, dismembered and disfigured bodies of their brothers we leave behind us, and the Germans won't be able to help themselves but to imagine the cruelty their brothers endured at our hands, and our boot heels, and the edge of our knives. And the Germans will be sickened by us, and the Germans will talk about us, and the Germans will fear us. And when the Germans close their eyes at night and they're tortured by their subconscious for the evil that they've done, it will be with thoughts of us that they are tortured with. Sound good?
:'''Soldiers''': Yes, sir!
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': That's what I like to hear. But I got a word of warning for all you would-be warriors: when you join my command, you take on debt, a debt you owe me personally. Each and every man under my command owes me one hundred Nazi scalps. And I want my scalps! And all y'all will get me one hundred Nazi scalps taken from the heads of one hundred dead Nazis, or you will die tryin'!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'. Up the road apiece, there's an orchard. Now, besides you, we know there's another kraut patrol fucking around there somewhere. Now if that patrol were to have any crackshots, that orchard would be a god-damn sniper's delight. If you ever want to eat a sauerkraut sandwich again, you gotta show me on this here map where they are, you gotta tell me how many there are, and you gotta tell me what kind of artillery they're carrying with them.
:'''Sgt. Werner Rachtman''': You can't expect me to divulge information that would put German lives in danger.
:'''Raine''': Well, now Werner, that's where you're wrong, because that's exactly what I expect. I need to know about Germans hiding in them trees, and you need to tell me, and you need to tell me right now. Now, just take that finger of yours and point out on this here map where this party's being held, how many's coming, and what they brought to play with.
:'''Rachtman''': [''Placing his hand on his chest''] I respectfully refuse, sir.
:'''Raine''': [''Rapping sound''] Hear that?
:'''Rachtman''': Yes.
:'''Raine''': That's Sgt. Donny Donowitz. You might know him better by his nickname: ''the Bear Jew.'' Now, if you heard of Aldo the Apache, you gotta have heard of the Bear Jew.
:'''Rachtman''': I've heard of the Bear Jew.
:'''Raine''': What did you hear?
:'''Rachtman''': He beats German soldiers with a club.
:'''Raine''': He bashes their brains in with a baseball bat, what he does. Now, Werner, I'm gonna ask you one last god-damn time. If you still respectfully refuse, I'm calling the Bear Jew over. He's gonna take that big bat of his, and he's gonna beat your ass to death with it. Now, take your wiener schnitzel lickin' finger and point out on this map what I want to know.
:'''Rachtman''': [''Softly''] Fuck you... [''screams''] ''and your Jew dogs''! [''The Basterds all laugh.'']
:'''Raine''': Actually, Werner, we're all tickled to hear you say that. Quite frankly, watching Donny beat Nazis to death is the closest we ever get to going to the movies. Donny!
:'''Sgt. Donny Donowitz''': [''From within a cave''] Yeah?
:'''Raine''': We got a German here who wants to die for his country! Oblige him!
:'''Donowitz''': [''Appears from cave and taps medal on Rachtman's chest''] Did you get that for killing Jews?
:'''Rachtman''': Bravery. [''Donny makes a few practice swings on Rachtman's head and then proceeds to bludgeon Rachtman'']
:'''Basterds Squad''': Yeah! Oh, no! Donny! Yeah, Donny!
:'''Raine''': [''To Wehrmacht captive Butz''] About now I'd be shitting my pants if I was you. [''Basterds laugh'']
:'''Donowitz''': [[w:Ted Williams|Teddy Fucking Williams]] knocks it out of the park! [[w:Fenway Park|Fenway Park]] is on its feet for Teddy Fucking Ballgame! He went yard on that one, on to fucking Lansdowne Street! [''to another prisoner''] You! [''Prisoner begins running and Hirschberg shoots him'']
:'''Raine''': Damn it, Hirschberg! Donny, bring that other one over here... ''ALIVE''.
:'''Donowitz''': [''To Butz''] Get the fuck up! Batter up. You're on deck! Two hits. I hit you, you hit the ground.
:'''Raine''': English?
:'''Corporal Butz''': Nein
:'''Raine''': Wicki! Ask him if he wants to live. [''Wicki translates''] Tell him to point out on this map the German position. [''Butz quickly points; the Basterds laugh'']
:'''Raine''': Ask him how many Germans. [''Butz replies'']
:'''Wilhelm Wicki''': Around about 12.
:'''Raine''': What kind of artillery? [''Butz replies''] Now, when you report what happened here, you can't tell them you told us what you told us. They'll shoot you. They're going to want to know why you're so special we let you live. So tell them we let you live so you could spread the word through the ranks what's going to happen to every Nazi we find. If you survive the war, when you get home, whatcha gonna do? [''Butz replies'']
:'''Wicki''': He's gonna hug his mother.
:'''Raine''': Well, ain't that nice. Ask him if he's gonna take off his uniform. [''Butz replies'']
:'''Wicki''': He's gonna burn it.
:'''Raine''': Yeah, that's what we thought. We don't like that. See, we like our Nazis in uniforms. That way you can spot 'em [''Snaps fingers''] just like that. If you take off that uniform, ain't nobody gonna know you was a Nazi. That don't sit well with us. [''Draws his [[w:Bowie knife|Bowie knife]]''] So I'm gonna give you something you can't take off.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[''Hellstrom is trying to guess the famous person written on the card on his forehead, who is King Kong'']
:'''Major Dieter Hellstrom''': Now, gentlemen, around this time you could ask whether you're real or fictitious. I, however, think that's too easy, so I won't ask that yet. Okay, my native land is the jungle. I visited America, but the visit was not fortuitous to me, but the implication is that it was to somebody else. When I went from the jungle to America, did I go by boat?
:'''Bridget von Hammersmark''': Yes.
:'''Hellstrom''': Did I go against my will?
:'''Von Hammersmark''': Yes.
: '''Hellstrom''': On this boat ride, was I in chains?
:'''Von Hammersmark''': Yes.
:'''Hellstrom''': When I arrived in America, was I displayed in chains?
:'''Von Hammersmark''': Yes!
:'''Hellstrom''': Am I the story of the negro in America?
:'''Cpl. Wilhelm Wicki''': No.
:'''Hellstrom''': Well, then, I must be King Kong.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Hellstrom''': [''In German''] I must say, I grow weary of these monkeyshines. [''Clicking sound''] Did you hear that? That was the sound of my Walther. Pointed right at your testicles.
:'''Lt. Archie Hicox''': Why do you have your Walther pointed at my testicles?
:'''Hellstrom''': Because you've just given yourself away, Captain. You're no more German than that scotch.
:'''Hicox''': Well, Major...
:'''Bridget von Hammersmark''': Major...
:'''Hellstrom''': Shut up, slut! You were saying?
:'''Hicox''': I was saying that that makes two of us. I've had a gun pointed at your balls since you sat down.
:'''Sgt. Hugo Stiglitz''': [''thrusting his Walther into Hellstrom's crotch''] That makes three of us. And at this range, I'm a real Frederick Zoller.
:'''Hellstrom''': Looks like we have a bit of a sticky situation here.
:'''Hicox''': What's going to happen, Major... you're going to stand up and walk out that door with us.
:'''Hellstrom''': No, no, no, no, no, no. I don't think so. I'm afraid, you and I, we both know, Captain, no matter what happens to anybody else in this room the two of us aren't going anywhere. Too bad about Sergeant Wilhelm and his famous friends. If any of you expect to live, you'll have to shoot them too. Looks like little Max will grow up an orphan. How sad.
:'''Hicox''': [''In English''] Well, if this is it, old boy, I hope you don't mind if I go out speaking [[W:King's English|the King's]].
:'''Hellstrom''': [''In English''] By all means, Captain.
:'''Hicox''': There's a special ring in hell reserved for people who waste good scotch. Seeing as how I may be rapping on the door momentarily... [''drinks''] I must say, damn good stuff, sir. Now, about this pickle we find ourselves in. It would appear there's only one thing left for you to do.
:'''Hellstrom''': And what would that be?
:'''Hicox''': Stiglitz...
:'''Stiglitz''': Say &quot;''auf Wiedersehen''&quot; to your Nazi balls!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot; /&gt;
:[''Aldo is faking Italian with [[w:Southern American English|a Southern US accent]]'']
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': Bon-jorno.
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': [''In flawless Italian''] Gentlemen, it's a pleasure; the friends of our cherished star, admired by all of us — this outright jewel of our culture — are naturally going to be under my personal protection for the duration of their stay.
:'''Raine''': Gratsy.
:'''Landa''': ''[In Italian]'' ''Gorlomi?'' Please, am I pronouncing it correctly?
:'''Raine''': ''Sì'' &amp;ndash; er, ''corretto''.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot; /&gt;
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': As of this moment, both Omar and Donowitz should be sitting in the very seats we left them in — 0023 and 0024, if my memory serves — explosives still around their ankle, still ready to explode, and your mission — some would call it terrorist plot — as of this moment is still a go.
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': That's a pretty exciting story. What's next, ''Eliza on Ice''?
:'''Landa''': However, all I have to do is pick up this phone right there, inform the cinema, and your plan's ''kaput''.
:'''Raine''': If they're still there, and if they're still alive — and that's one big if — there ain't no way you gonna take them boys without setting off them bombs.
:'''Landa''': I have no doubt. Yes, some Germans will die, and yes, it will ruin the evening, and yes, Goebbels will be very, very, very mad at you for what you've done to his big night. But you won't get Hitler, you won't get Goebbels, you won't get Göring, and you won't get Bormann. And you need all four to end the war. But if I don't pick up this phone right here, you may very well get all four. And if you get all four, you end the war tonight! [''Lifts up the Chianti and fills their glasses''] So, gentlemen, let's discuss the prospect of ending the war tonight. Gentlemen, I have no intention of killing [[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]] and killing [[Joseph Goebbels|Goebbels]] and killing [[Hermann Göring|Göring]] and killing [[Martin Bormann|Bormann]], not to mention winning the war single-handedly for the Allies, only later to find myself standing before a Jewish tribunal. If you want to win the war tonight,''[places hands on table]'' we have to make a deal.
:'''Lieutenant Aldo Raine''': What kind o' deal?
:'''Landa''': The kind you wouldn't have the authority to make. However, I'm sure this mission of yours has a commanding officer — a general, I'm betting — for [[W:Office of Strategic Services|OSS]] would be my guess. [''Raine is speechless''] Oooh, that's a bingo! ''[curiously]'' Is that the way you say it: &quot;that's a bingo&quot;?
:'''Raine''': You just say &quot;bingo.&quot;
:'''Landa''': ''[gleefully]'' Bingo! How fun.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot; /&gt;
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': You know, where I'm from—
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': Yeah, where is that, exactly?
:'''Raine''': [[W:Maynardville, Tennessee|Maynardville, Tennessee]] — I done my share of bootleggin'. Up there, if you engage in what the federal government calls illegal activity, but what we call a man just trying to earn a living for his family selling moonshine liquor, it behooves oneself to keep his wits. Long story short: we hear a story too good to be true, it ain't.
:'''Landa''': Sitting in your chair, I would probably say the same thing. And 999.999 times out of a million you would be correct. But in the pages of history, every once in a while, fate reaches out and extends its hand. What shall the history books read?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Col. Hans Landa''': I'm officially surrendering myself over to you, Lieutenant Raine. We're your prisoners.
:'''Lt. Aldo Raine''': How 'bout my knife? ''[Landa gives Raine his Bowie knife]'' Thank you very much, Colonel. Utivich, cuff the Colonel's hands behind his back.
:'''Landa''': Oh, is that really necessary?
:'''Raine''': I'm a slave to appearances. ''[shoots Hermann with Landa's Walther. To Utivich]'' Scalp Hermann.
:'''Landa''': ''[shocked]'' ''Are you MAD?! What have you DONE?! I made a DEAL with your generals for that man's LIFE!!''
:'''Raine''': Yeah, they made that deal. but they don't give a fuck about him. They need you.
:'''Landa''': ''You'll be SHOT for this!!''
:'''Raine''': Nah, I don't think so. More like chewed out. I've been chewed out before. You know, Utivich and I heard that deal you made with the brass. To end the war tonight? I'd make that deal. How about you, Utivich? You'd make that deal?
:'''Utivich''': ''[Scalping Hermann]'' I'd make that deal.
:'''Raine''': I don't blame you. ''Damn'' good deal! And that pretty little nest you feathered for yourself. Well, if you're willing to barbecue the whole High Command, I suppose that's worth certain considerations, but I do have one question. When you get your little place on Nantucket Island, I imagine you're gonna want to take off that handsome [[W:Schutzstaffel|SS]] uniform of yours. Ain't ya? ''[Landa looks at him angrily]'' That's what I thought. Now that I can't abide. How about you, Utivich? Can you abide it?
:'''Utivich''': Not one damn bit, sir.
:'''Raine''': I mean, if I had my way, you'd wear that god-damn uniform for the rest of your pecker-sucking life. But I'm aware that ain't practical. I mean, at some point you're gonna have to take it off. So ''[draws his Bowie knife]'' I'm gonna give you a little something you can't take off.

== Taglines ==
* Once upon a time in Nazi occupied France…
* You haven't seen war until you've seen it through the eyes of Quentin Tarantino.
* If You Need Heroes, Send In The Basterds
* AN INGLORIOUS, UPROARIOUS THRILL-RIDE OF VENGEANCE
* A basterd's work is never done.
* There are no crimes behind enemy lines.

== Cast ==
{{col-begin}}
{{col-2}}
* [[Brad Pitt]] &amp;ndash; Lieutenant Aldo &quot;The Apache&quot; Raine
* [[w:Christoph Waltz|Christoph Waltz]] &amp;ndash; [[w:Standartenführer|Standartenführer]] [[w:Hans Landa|Hans &quot;The Jew Hunter&quot; Landa]]
* [[w:Melanie Laurent|Mélanie Laurent]] &amp;ndash; Shosanna Dreyfus aka Emmanuelle Mimieux
* [[w:Eli Roth|Eli Roth]] &amp;ndash; Staff Sergeant Donny &quot;The Bear Jew&quot; Donowitz 
* [[w:Til Schweiger|Til Schweiger]] &amp;ndash; [[w:Oberfeldwebel|Oberfeldwebel]] Hugo Stiglitz
* [[w:Michael Fassbender|Michael Fassbender]] &amp;ndash; Lieutenant Archie Hicox
* [[w:Daniel Brühl|Daniel Brühl]] &amp;ndash; [[w:Oberschütze|Oberschütze]] Frederick Zoller
* [[w:Diane Krüger|Diane Krüger]] &amp;ndash; Bridget von Hammersmark
* [[w:B.J. Novak|B.J. Novak]] &amp;ndash; Private First Class Smithson &quot;The Little Man&quot; Utivich
* [[w:Gedeon Burkhard|Gedeon Burkhard]] &amp;ndash; Corporal Wilhelm Wicki
* [[w:Jacky Ido|Jacky Ido]] &amp;ndash; Marcel
* [[w:August Diehl|August Diehl]] &amp;ndash; [[w:Sturmbannführer|Sturmbannführer]] Dieter Hellstrom
{{col-2}}
* [[w:Sylvester Groth|Sylvester Groth]] &amp;ndash; [[Joseph Goebbels]]
* [[w:Martin Wuttke|Martin Wuttke]] &amp;ndash; [[Adolf Hitler]]
* [[w:Mike Myers (actor)|Mike Myers]] &amp;ndash; General Ed Fenech
* [[w:Omar Doom|Omar Doom]] &amp;ndash; Private First Class Omar Ulmer
* [[w:Samm Levine|Samm Levine]] &amp;ndash; Private First Class Gerold Hirschberg
* [[w:Paul Rust|Paul Rust]] &amp;ndash; Private First Class Andy Kagan
* [[w:Michael Bacall|Michael Bacall]] &amp;ndash; Private First Class Michael Zimmerman
* Carlos Fidel &amp;ndash; Private First Class Simon Sakowitz
* [[w:Julie Dreyfus|Julie Dreyfus]] &amp;ndash; Francesca Mondino
* [[w:Rod Taylor|Rod Taylor]] &amp;ndash; [[Winston Churchill]] (final film role)
* [[w:Samuel L. Jackson|Samuel L. Jackson]] &amp;ndash; Narrator
{{col-end}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0361748|title=Inglourious Basterds}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=inglourious_basterds|title=Inglourious Basterds}}
* [http://inglouriousbasterds-movie.com/ Official site]

[[Category:2009 films]]
[[Category:2000s American films]]
[[Category:German films]]
[[Category:American drama films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Quentin Tarantino]]
[[Category:World War II films]]
[[Category:Screenplays by Quentin Tarantino]]
[[Category:Films about Nazis]]
[[Category:Films about revenge]]
[[Category:Alternate history films]]
[[Category:Films about assassinations]]
[[Category:Holocaust films]]
[[Category:Films about Jews and Judaism]]</text>
      <sha1>6qd0qpbz2fwyaan6n6faug3faa6ilo8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Texas</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>111611</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965173</id>
      <parentid>3878649</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:36:27Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>C00lnameig123</username>
        <id>3350172</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>He was referring to the city of Texas Frisco and was not using a nickname for San Fransico</comment>
      <origin>3965173</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="59575" sha1="3eg2789imi6wbqjrdg2rb828p32etgc" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Flag of Texas.svg|thumb|All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is the place I dearly love to be. But, all my exes live in Texas. ~ George Strait]]
[[File:Seal of Texas.svg|thumb|Friendship! ~ ''Motto of the State of Texas'']]
'''[[w:Texas|Texas]]''', officially the '''State of Texas''', is the second largest [[w:U.S. state|state]] in the [[United States]] by both [[w:List of U.S. states and territories by area|area]] and [[w:List of U.S. states and territories by population|population]]. Geographically located in the [[w:South Central United States|south central]] part of the country, Texas shares borders with the other US states of [[Louisiana]] to the east, [[Arkansas]] to the northeast, [[Oklahoma]] to the north, [[w:New Mexico|New Mexico]] to the west, and the [[w:States of Mexico|Mexican states]] of [[w:Chihuahua (state)|Chihuahua]], [[w:Coahuila|Coahuila]], [[w:Nuevo León|Nuevo León]], and [[w:Tamaulipas|Tamaulipas]] to the southwest, while the [[w:Gulf of Mexico|Gulf of Mexico]] is to the southeast. Its state government is currently controlled by the [[Republican Party (United States)|Republican Party]], and its current governor is [[Greg Abbott]].

Texas was originally a territory of [[Mexico]] which seceded in the [[w:Texas_Revolution|Texas Revolution]] and was [[w:Texas_annexation|annexed by the United States]] at the beginning of the [[Mexican–American War]]. It also joined the [[Confederate States of America]] during the [[American Civil War]]. [[Houston]] is the [[w:List of cities in Texas by population|most populous city]] in Texas and the [[w:List of United States cities by population|fourth largest]] in the US, while [[w:San Antonio|San Antonio]] is the second most populous in the state and seventh largest in the US. [[w:Dallas–Fort Worth metroplex|Dallas–Fort Worth]] and [[w:Greater Houston|Greater Houston]] are the fourth and fifth largest [[w:List of Metropolitan Statistical Areas|metropolitan statistical areas]] in the country, respectively. Other major cities include [[w:Austin, Texas|Austin]], the second most populous [[w:List of capitals in the United States|state capital]] in the US, and [[w:El Paso, Texas|El Paso]]. Texas is nicknamed the ''Lone Star State'' to signify its former status as an independent republic, and as a reminder of the state's struggle for independence from [[Mexico]].

[[File:Texas flag map.svg|thumb|I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state! ~ ''Pledge of allegiance to the flag of the State of Texas'']]
[[File:Big Spring State Park Pavilion 2009.jpg|thumb|I can see that 'Lone Star' from a thousand miles away calling me back home though I've ventured far astray. When I see that beacon shining for me all alone, it calls me back to Texas and to home. ~ Tony Marcus]]
[[File:Cowboy Hats.jpg|thumb|Like guns in Texas; there are more cowboy hats than there are people here. That's because most cowboy hat wearers have more than one hat and avid cowboy hat wearers have more than five. Really addicted cowboy hat wearers have more than ten hats and 20 boots. ~ Ralph D. Thomas]]
[[File:MVI 2960 Campfire scene at TX Cowboy Hall of Fame.jpg|thumb|One of the most often quoted sayings in Texas is, 'Where did you get that hat?' The second most quoted saying is, 'Don't touch my hat!' ~ Ralph D. Thomas]]
[[File:CornmealProducts.jpg|thumb|Mariachi music, folklorika dancing and an ample supply of Mexican food. For a little while, it was just like being in Texas again. Growing up in Texas gave me many things I'm thankful for... In Texas, it's in the air you breathe.  ~ [[George W. Bush]]]]
[[File:Houston night life.jpg|thumb|The stars at night are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas. ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Houston_Ship_Channel.jpg|thumb|Don't try to knock us baby; don't try to hate. That's how we do it in that Lone Star state; get it straight. ~ [[w:Bun B|Bernard Freeman]]]]
[[File:Altamira Oriole icterus gularis Bentsen State Park, South Texas.jpg|thumb|The prairie sky is wide and high, deep in the heart of Texas. The sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas. ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Cityscape of McAllen, Texas.jpg|thumb|Texas; prettiest place in the world. ~ [[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]]]
[[File:Hidalgo County Courthouse.jpg|thumb|I want to wake up in Texas, I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies. ~ [[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]]]
[[File:US_Highway_83_in_McAllen,_Texas.jpg|thumb|Texas has four seasons. Drought, Flood, Blizzard and Twister. ~ Anonymous]]
[[File:United States and Texas Flags.jpg|thumb|A mighty American name? I can't think of a better name than Texas. ~ [[Laura Bush]]]]
[[File:2002 Olympic Torch Relay George W Bush.jpg|thumb|Some folks look at me and see swagger, which in [[w:Texas|Texas]] is called 'walking'. ~ [[George W. Bush]]]]
[[File:HrlVIA.jpg|thumb|When you represent Texas, always go first class. ~ [[James Michener]]]]
[[File:Texascowboys.jpg|thumb|The cowboys cry, ''{{'}}Ki-yip-pee-yi!{{'}}'', deep in the heart of Texas. The doggies bawl, and bawl and bawl, deep in the heart of Texas! ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Amarillo Texas Downtown.jpg|thumb|When I'm so far from you, Texas? All I can do is cry. ~ Sandy Cheeks]]
[[File:Texas quarter, reverse side, 2004.png|thumb|A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner. ~ [[John Steinbeck]]]]
[[File:2007 Tech at Texas Flag.jpg|thumb|When a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners. ~ [[John Steinbeck]]]]
[[File:US Navy 100215-N-8848T-824 The first Navy Sailors to participate in the Secretary of Defense's Military Accessions Vital to National Interest pilot program.jpg|thumb|We favor strengthening our common American identity and loyalty, which includes the contribution and assimilation of different racial and ethnic groups. ~ ''Texan Republican Party Platform of 2014'']]
[[File:Copper Breaks State Park View.jpg|thumb|I'm a rolling stone from Texas&lt;br&gt;Rolling stone from the plains&lt;br&gt;I'm a rolling stone from Texas, boy&lt;br&gt;I long to be back there again ~ Don Walser]]
[[File:Daingerfield sp lake.jpg|thumb|They say a rolling stone never gathers no moss&lt;br&gt;As long as it's rolling along&lt;br&gt;Oh, but I don't care if I've gathered any moss&lt;br&gt;If it's in my Texas home ~ Don Walser]]

__NOTOC__
{{TOCalpha}}

==Quotes==
===A===
*Texas will see you in court [[Joe Biden|Mr President]].
**Abbott to DOJ suit over border [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4dj7zvFmDY]{{fix cite|date=November 2025}}
* Texas has four seasons... Drought, flood, blizzard, and twister.
** Anonymous proverb, as quoted in [http://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/texas_has_four_seasons_drought_flood_blizzard_and_twister/ ''The Big Apple'']

*Texas was a logical slave state. Her geographical latitude, her climate, her industrial opportunities aligned her among those divisions of the world who were the last to break away from an institution which had been fastened upon both barbarism and civilization from times unrecorded.
** [https://books.google.com/books?id=b1tNAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA193 ''A Twentieth Century History of Southwest Texas: Illustrated''] (1907), &quot;The Civil War Period&quot;, Volume 1, New York: The Lewis Publishing Company, p. 197

===B===
*[[Conservatism|Conservatives]] look to Texas as their bright shining light. They hold it up as a model of limited government, where low [[Taxation in the United States|taxes]] and [[business]]-friendly [[regulation]] have led to job growth and [[economic growth]] surpassing the [[Economy of the United States|national average]] over the last three decades. If the rest of the country followed the Texas model, the tale goes, our economic woes would be behind us and we would all share in a more prosperous future. The conservatives do have at least the beginnings of a case. Texas has outstripped the rest of the country in job creation. Since the [[business cycle]] peak in 1981, the number of jobs in Texas has increased by more than 78 percent. That compares with less than 52 percent for the country as a whole. The gains are not just [[oil]], although oil is a big part of the picture. If we chose the business cycle peak in 2000, when oil prices were low, as the basis of comparison, then the Texas job growth story would be less impressive. It beats national job growth by just 1.1 percent. 47.1 for Texas and 46.0 for the U.S. Hot air — or to be more generous, a warm climate — is also a big part of the story. 
**Dean Baker, [https://web.archive.org/web/20140616034836/http://america.aljazeera.com/opinions/2014/6/texas-miracle-economyjobswages.html &quot;Tall tales about Texas&quot;] (13 June 2014), ''Al-Jazeera America''

*Job growth in Texas has substantially exceeded growth in [[California]], which also has the benefit of a warm climate. This provides a clear political contrast, since California has become one of the most [[Democratic Party (United States)|Democratic]] states in the country, while Texas has become one of the most Republican. Red-state Texas easily bests blue-state California in the job growth contest since 1981, 78 to 59 percent. But the main reason for this gap is simply that the states are not playing the same game. Texas has consciously promoted development... Texas has more and cheaper [[House|housing]] than California. Just to take a couple of examples. The fair market rent for a two-bedroom apartment in [[Los Angeles|Los Angeles County]] is $1,398 a month, according to the [[w:United_States_Department_of_Housing_and_Urban_Development|Department of Housing and Urban Development]]. By contrast, in Harris County, Texas, which includes Houston, it’s just $926. The fair market rent for a two-bedroom apartment in Santa Clara County, which includes San Jose, is $1,649 a month. It was just $894 in Dallas County in 2010, the most recent year available. The gaps are even larger for home sale prices.
**Dean Baker, [https://web.archive.org/web/20140616034836/http://america.aljazeera.com/opinions/2014/6/texas-miracle-economyjobswages.html &quot;Tall tales about Texas&quot;] (13 June 2014), ''Al-Jazeera America''

*The [[Democratic Party (United States)|Democratic Party]]'s favorite hobbies are winning, [[w:Texas|Texas]] and exhaustion. 
** [[Russell Baker]], &quot;[http://select.nytimes.com/gst/abstract.html?res=F30911FA3E5F127A93C0AB1783D85F4C8685F9 Observer: The Democrats in a Nutshell]&quot;, ''The New York Times'' (22 August 1968) Baker's predictions came true with appearance of the [[w:New Covenant (politics)|New Covenant]] and the [http://www.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,20081124,00.html New New Deal]

*Having lived in Texas as a youth and been forced to study Texas history, I thought I knew the story of its admission to the Union pretty well. But I never knew the profound importance of race to that history. In particular, I did not know that [[Mexico]] had abolished [[slavery]] and that this was a key reason for the war for Texas independence. The Texans were determined to keep their slaves and were willing to fight to the death for that right. And of course, the admission of Texas as a state was critical to the maintenance of [[slavery in the United States]], which was threatened both economically and politically in the 1840s.
**[[w:Bruce Bartlett|Bruce Bartlett]], [https://books.google.com/books?id=vb3Mx7GqAmwC&amp;printsec=frontcover&amp;dq=isbn:9780230600621&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=0CB4Q6AEwAGoVChMIi92Er-SPxwIVhnQ-Ch3plQCk#v=onepage&amp;q&amp;f=false ''Wrong on Race: The Democratic Party's Buried Past''] (2008), p. x

*in 1836, when Texas won its independence from Mexico, [[Andrew Jackson|President Jackson]] stated that annexing the Republic of Texas would expand America's &quot;area of freedom&quot; and extend its &quot;circle of free institutions.&quot; However, the conception of [[freedom]] being articulated by the Anglo [[settlers]] of the Texas republic was deeply [[Racism in the United States|racialized]]: not only were most settlers originally from the [[w:Deep_South|Deep South]] but many were &quot;land speculators, slavers, militia leaders, and Indian killers.&quot;
**[[Cristina Beltrán]] ''Cruelty as Citizenship: How Migrant Suffering Sustains White Democracy'' (2020) p 66

*Everything is bigger in Texas, including economic growth. Texas was America's second fastest growing economy.
**Ananya Bhattacharya, [http://money.cnn.com/2015/06/10/news/economy/texas-big-economic-growth-2014/ &quot;Is Texas America's best state economy?&quot;] (10 June 2015), ''CNN Money''

* You don't get everything you want. A dictatorship would be a lot easier.
** [[George W. Bush]], responding to the difficulties of governing Texas, as quoted in [http://www.governing.com/archive/1998/jul/bush.txt &quot;The Taming of Texas&quot;], ''Governing Magazine'' (July 1998)

*We celebrated a little early at the White House this year, on quatro de Mayo, with a fiesta on the South Lawn. With the mariachi music, folklorika dancing and an ample supply of Mexican food. For a little while, it was just like being in Texas again. Growing up in Texas gave me many things I'm thankful for. And one of them is an appreciation of the Hispanic culture. In Texas, it's in the air you breathe; Hispanic life, Hispanic culture and Hispanic values are inseparable from the life of our state, and have been for many generations. The history of Mexican-American relations has had its troubled moments, but today our peoples enrich each other in trade and culture and family ties.
** [[George W. Bush]], [https://web.archive.org/web/20010507184032/http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2001/05/20010505-1.html radio address] (5 May 2001)

*My fellow Americans, this day has brought terrible news and great sadness to our country. At 9:00 a.m. this morning, Mission Control in [[Houston]] lost contact with our Space Shuttle ''Columbia''. A short time later, debris was seen falling from the skies above Texas. The ''Columbia'' is lost; there are no survivors.
** [[George W. Bush]], [https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Columbia_Space_Shuttle_Tragedy_Speech remarks after ''Columbia'' space shuttle disaster, televised remarks] (1 February 2003)

* Some folks look at me and see swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking'.
** [[George W. Bush]], accepting the Republican nomination for President in New York City (September 2004). Reported in [http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/13/magazine/13safire.html ''The New York Times'']

*A mighty [[United States Navy|American submarine]] deserves a mighty American name. I can't think of a better name than Texas. Skilled professionals will forge the newest alloys and technology into one of the most sophisticated [[ships]] in the world. The Texas will represent America's iron fist, which our country uses to protect our [[Citizenship|citizens]]; and to help our neighbors and allies around the world.
**[[Laura Bush]], [https://web.archive.org/web/20051029095258/http://www.nn.northropgrumman.com/news/2002/020712_ngnn_lays_keel_of_virginia_class.pdf speech at Newport News, Virginia] (12 July 2002)

===C===
*When Texas became one of the United States, she entered into an indissoluble relation. All the obligations of perpetual union, and all the guaranties of [[Republic|republican government]] in the [[Union (United States)|Union]], attached at once to the state. The Act which consummated her admission into the Union was something more than a compact; it was the incorporation of a new member into the political body. And it was final.
**[[Salmon P. Chase]], [http://blog.constitutioncenter.org/2012/11/constitution-check-can-texas-get-constitutional-permission-to-leave-the-union/ ''Texas v. White'']

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': Can't you see? It's Texas... Wish I was in Texas, prettiest place in the world... I want to wake up in Texas, I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies. Oh, why? When I'm so far from you, Texas? All I can do is cry.
:*[http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Texas_(song) &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''Patrick Star''': What's so great about dumb old Texas?
:*[http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Texas_(song) &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': Don't you dare take the name of Texas in vain! 
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''SpongeBob Squarepants''': We can't say anything bad about dumb old Texas?
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''Patrick Star''': Then, can we say people from Texas are dumb?
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': No, you can't say nothing about Texas! 
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''SpongeBob Squarepants''': The stars at night are dull and dim, whenever they have to be over dumb old stupid Texas!
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLLzoge50f0 &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

* The westward tide rolled on, bearing with it new problems of adjustment. The generation of the 1840’s saw their culmination. During these years there took place the annexation of Texas, a [[Mexican–American War|war with Mexico]], the conquest of [[California]], and the settlement of the [[Oregon]] boundary with [[British Empire|Great Britain]]. Adventurous Americans in search of land and riches had been since 1820 crossing the [[w:Mexico-United_States_border|Mexican boundary]] into the Texas country, which belonged to the Republic of Mexico, freed from [[Spain]] - in 1821. While this community was growing, American sailors on the Pacific coast, captains interested in the [[China]] trade, established themselves in the ports of the Mexican Province of California. Pioneers pushed their way overland in search of skins and furs, and by 1826 reached the mission stations of the Province. The [[Mexicans]], alarmed at the appearance of these settlers, vainly sought to stem the flood; for Mexican Governments were highly unstable, and in distant Provinces their writ hardly ran. But there appeared on the scene a new military dictator, [[w:Antonio_Lopez_de_Santa_Anna|Santa Anna]], determined to strengthen Mexican authority, and at once a revolt broke out. 
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), pp. 110
* In November 1835 the Americans in Texas erected an autonomous state and raised the [[w:Lone_Star_flag|Lone Star flag]]. The Mexicans, under Santa Anna, marched northwards. At the Mission House of the Alamo in March 1836 a small body of Texans, fighting to the last man, was exterminated in one of the epic fights of [[History of the United States|American history]] by a superior Mexican force. The whole Province was aroused. Under the leadership of General [[Sam Houston]] from [[Tennessee]] a force was raised, and in savage fighting the Mexican army of Santa Anna was in its turn destroyed and its commander captured at San Jacinto River. The Texans had stormed the positions with the cry “Remember the Alamo!” The independence of Texas was recognised by Santa Anna. His act was repudiated later by the Mexican Government, but their war effort was exhausted, and the Texans organised themselves into a republic, electing Sam Houston as President.
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), pp. 110-111

* For the next ten years the question of the admission of Texas as a state of the Union was a burning issue in [[Politics of the United States|American politics]]. As each new state demanded entry into the Union so the feeling for and against [[Slavery in the United States|slavery]] ran higher. The great [[Abolitionism|Abolitionist]] journalist, [[William Lloyd Garrison]], called for a secession of the Northern states if the slave state of Texas was admitted to the Union. The Southerners, realising that Texan votes would give them a majority in the [[United States Senate|Senate]] if this vast territory was admitted as a number of separate states, clamoured for annexation. The [[Capitalism|capitalists]] of the East were committed, through the formation of land companies, to exploit Texas, and besides the issue of dubious stocks by these bodies vast quantities of paper notes and bonds of the new Texan Republic were floated in the United States. The speculation in these helped to split the political opposition of the Northern states to the annexation. Even more important was the conversion of many Northerners to belief in the “[[Manifest Destiny]]” of the United States. This meant that their destiny was ! to spread across the whole of the [[North America|North American]] continent. The Democratic Party in the election of 1844 called for the occupation of Oregon as well as the annexation of Texas, thus holding out to the North the promise of Oregon as a counterweight to Southern Texas. The victory of the Democratic candidate, [[James K. Polk]], was interpreted as a mandate for admitting Texas, and this was done by joint resolution of Congress in February 1845.
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), p. 111

*The [[equality]] of all persons before the law is herein recognized, and shall ever remain inviolate; nor shall any citizen ever be deprived of any right, privilege, or immunity, nor be exempted from any burdens, or duty, on account of race, color, or previous condition.
**Section XXI, [https://web.archive.org/web/20160302122409/http://tarlton.law.utexas.edu/constitutions/texas1869/preamble_a1 ''Constitution of the State of Texas''] (1869)

*[T]he adoption of any system of peonage, whereby the helpless and unfortunate may be reduced to practical bondage, shall never be authorized, or tolerated by laws of the State; and neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a [[punishment]] for [[crime]], whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall ever exist in the State.
**Section XXII, [https://web.archive.org/web/20160302122409/http://tarlton.law.utexas.edu/constitutions/texas1869/preamble_a1 ''Constitution of the State of Texas''] (1869)

*Independence without slavery, would be valueless... The South without slavery would not be worth a mess of pottage.
**[[w:Caleb Cutwell|Caleb Cutwell]], letter to the ''Galvaston Tri-Weekly'' (22 February 1865)

===D===
*We hold as undeniable truths that the governments of the various States, and of the [[Confederate States of America|confederacy]] itself, were established exclusively by the white race, for themselves and their posterity; that the [[Black people|African race]] had no agency in their establishment; that they were rightfully held and regarded as an inferior and dependent race, and in that condition only could their existence in this country be rendered beneficial or tolerable.
** [https://web.archive.org/web/20081107232146/http://avalon.law.yale.edu/19th_century/csa_texsec.asp ''A Declaration of the Causes which Impel the State of Texas to Secede from the Federal Union''] (February 1861).

===E===
*General Orders, No. 3. The people are informed that, in accordance with a proclamation from the [[President of the United States|Executive of the United States]], all slaves are free. This involves an absolute [[Equal rights|equality of personal rights]] and [[Right to property|rights of property]], between former masters and slaves, and the connection heretofore existing between them, becomes that between employer and hired labor. The Freedmen are advised to remain at their present homes, and work for wages. They are informed that they will not be allowed to collect at military posts; and that they will not be supported in idleness either there or elsewhere.
**[[w:F.W. Emery|F.W. Emery]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2015/06/18/juneteenth-history-and-tradition-5/ ''General Orders, No. 3''] (19 June 1865), Galveston, Texas: Headquarters, District of Texas.
===F===
*So don't try to knock us baby, don't try to hate. That's how we do it in that Lone Star state; get it straight.
**[[w:Bun B|Bernard Freeman]], [http://genius.com/Bun-b-draped-up-h-town-mix-feat-the-h-town-all-starz-lyrics &quot;Draped Up&quot;]

===G===
*Formerly, the purchase of Texas by [[Federal government of the United States|our Government]], for the purpose of bestowing it as a gift upon [[African Americans|our colored population]], was a favorite opinion of ours; but we have settled down into the belief, that the object is neither practicable nor expedient. In the first place, it is not probable that the [[United States Congress|Congress]] would make the purchase; nor, secondly, is it likely that the mass of our colored people would remove without some compulsory process; nor, thirdly, would it be safe or convenient to organise them as a distinct nation among us,—an imperium in imperio. The fact is, it is time to repudiate all [[Colonialism|colonization]] schemes, as visionary and unprofitable; all those, we mean, which have for their design [[Racial segregation|the entire separation of the blacks from the whites]]. We must take our free colored and slave inhabitants as we find them—recognise them as countrymen who have extraordinary claims upon our charities—give them the advantages of [[education]]—respect them as members of one great family, who may be made useful in society and honorable in reputation. This is our view of the subject.
**[[William Lloyd Garrison]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2016/03/21/garrison-gives-up-on-colonization/ ''The Liberator''] (22 January 1861)

* Thermopylae had her messenger of defeat—the Alamo had none.
** [[w:Thomas Jefferson Green|Thomas Jefferson Green]], reported in ''Respectfully Quoted: A Dictionary of Quotations'' (1989). Green is said to have included the sentence in a speech he helped [[w:Edward Burleson|Edward Burleson]] prepare. While Burleson has often been credited with originating the sentence as well as using it, he lacked the classical education necessary to have made the allusion. The sentence became popular after it was engraved on the first monument to the Alamo, which is located in Austin, Texas. The 10-foot-high statue, made of stones from the Alamo, was destroyed by fire when the Capitol at Austin burned. Another monument subsequently erected on the Capitol grounds also included the sentence. J. Frank Dobie, &quot;The Alamo’s Immortalization of Words&quot;, ''Southwest Review'' (Summer 1942), p. 406–10.

*I wish for the people of Texas, as I do for the people of the entire [[Southern United States|South]], that they may go on developing their resources, and become great and powerful, and in their prosperity forget, as the worthy Mayor expressed it, that there is a boundary between the North and South. I am sure we will all be happier and much more prosperous when the day comes that there shall be no sectional feeling.
**[[Ulysses S. Grant]], as quoted in [https://books.google.com/books?id=wqJBAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA48 ''Words of Our Hero, Ulysses S. Grant''], p. 56

===H===
*The Confederate Trans-Mississippi Department did not formally surrender until June 2, 1865—''two months'' after the fall of Richmond. During that whole time, except for a few isolated areas, [[w:Texas|Texas]] was not occupied by Union troops and the whole area was in a sort of limbo, still officially in rebellion but without a clear course and without a national leadership. The {{w|U.S. Navy}} officially took possession of Texas on June 5, but did not have soldiers to establish a formal presence. General Granger arrived with troops at Galveston on June 17, and two days later issued a series of administrative notices formally notifying all of Texas that the state was now under formal [[military occupation]], who the key officers and departments were, and so on. The third of these notices was General Order No. 3, that formally announced emancipation under the terms of the [[Emancipation Proclamation]] of January 1, 1863. These notices were published in [[Newspapers|papers]] around the state, first in Galveston and then elsewhere as the news was carried inland by telegraph and railroad.
**[[w:Andy Hall|Andy Hall]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2014/06/22/a-juneteenth-follow-up/ &quot;A Juneteenth Follow-Up&quot;] (22 June 2014), ''Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog''.

*June 5, 1865. Federal forces formally took possession of Texas. Captain Benjamin F. Sands, commanding the division of the West Gulf Blockading Squadron stationed off Galveston, boarded a small Union steamer, USS ''Cornubia'', and entered Galveston harbor, followed by another gunboat, USS ''Preston''. Sands disembarked with a handful of other officers, but took no armed escort, and was met on the wharf by a Confederate officer. The officer escorted the Union men a few blocks to City Hall, where both Sands and the mayor of Galveston addressed a crowd that had gathered there. Both men made assurances of their goodwill and urged the population to go about their business peaceably. Sands told the crowd that he carried a sidearm that day not out of any fear for his own safety but as a sign of respect for the mayor and local officials. Then, along with the mayor, Sands continued on to the old U.S. Customs House, where he &quot;hoisted our flag, which now, at last, was flying over every foot of our territory, this being the closing act of the great rebellion.&quot;
**[[w:Andy Hall|Andy Hall]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2015/06/05/the-closing-act-of-the-great-rebellion/ &quot;The Closing Act of the Great Rebellion&quot;] (5 June 2015), ''Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog''.

* The [[stars]] at [[night]] are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The prairie [[sky]] is wide and high, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;Reminds me of, the one I love, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The [[Coyote|coyotes]] wail, along the trail, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;/br&gt;The [[rabbits]] rush, around the brush, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The cowboys cry, ''{{'}}Ki-yip-pee-yi!{{'}}'', deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The doggies bawl, and bawl and bawl, deep in the heart of Texas!
**June Hershey, [http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=VGF4ibgcHQE#Deep_In_The_Heart_Of_Texas______Song &quot;Deep in the Heart of Texas&quot;] (1941).

* This deadly, frigid, multibillion-dollar chaos in energy-rich Texas was not the result of a polar vortex but a small-minded vortex of [[Right-wing politics|right-wing]] political hokum that puts the interests of a few corporate profiteers over the well-being of the people...  Responding to withering public criticism of the state's chaotic and disastrous response to a killer winter storm, [[Greg Abbott|Abbott]] fumed, &quot;What happened this week to our fellow Texans is absolutely unacceptable.&quot;... Abbott pointed his outrage at ERCOT, the Electric Reliability Council of Texas, the agency charged with maintaining a reliable flow of electricity to Texas homes, schools, businesses, etc.  But... ERCOT merely administers policies set by the Public Utility Commission, and that corporate-cozy body has failed for years to mandate that the state's privatized, for-profit electric utilities weatherize their power generators to prevent freeze-ups. And who appointed the three members of that commission? Why, Greg, it was you! In fact, the chairwoman and one of the two other members of PUC are former top staffers of the governor.
**[[Jim Hightower|Jim Hightower,]] What the Texas Deep Freeze Revealed About Corporate-Run Government, ''Common Dreams'' (24 February 2021)

* The word ''Texas'' is from a native word—or, a [[w:Caddo language|Caddo]] word—meaning &quot;friendly&quot;. So, that means early Texas settlers were like, &quot;Oh! &quot;Friendly&quot;. That's a great one! I'm 'onna call this land Friendly. I like that word. Now, you gotta go! [[wikt:git#Etymology 2|Git]]! It's my land now. Git! Git!
** Laura Horse. ''First Nations Comedy Experience'', episode 1 (9 March 2018)

* Texas will again lift its head and stand among the nations. it ought to do so, for no country upon the globe can compare with it in natural advantages.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* All new states are invested, more or less, by a class of noisy, second-rate men who are always in favor of rash and extreme measures, but Texas was absolutely overrun by such men.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* Texas is lost.
**[[Sam Houston]], as quoted in [http://grandoldpartisan.typepad.com/blog/2016/03/sam-houston.html &quot;Revering Sam Houston, anti-Confederate patriot&quot;] (18 March 2016), by Michael Zak, ''Grand Old Partisan''

* One objection I have heard voiced to works of this kind&amp;mdash;dealing with Texas&amp;mdash;is the amount of gore spilled across the pages. It can not be otherwise. In order to write a realistic and true history of any part of the Southwest, one must narrate such things, even at the risk of monotony.
** [[Robert E. Howard]] in a letter to {{w|August Derleth}} (March 1933).

===J===

* If you haven't climbed up to Enchanted Rock,&lt;br&gt;Drank a cold Shiner down in Luckenbach,&lt;br&gt;Taken your baby to the River Walk,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* If you never caught a trout down in Port A,&lt;br&gt;Heard the words to Corpus Christi Bay,&lt;br&gt;Never seen fireworks on PK,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* Havent had a kolache when you go through West,&lt;br&gt;Never heard of the Larry Jo Taylor fest,&lt;br&gt;Think polished pop country crap sounds the best,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* You say you haven't hiked through Big Bend,&lt;br&gt;Had your hair blown back by a Lubbock wind,&lt;br&gt;Been somewhere where they call you &quot;friend&quot;,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

===K===

*Texas is about as far from a Green New Deal as you can possibly get, seeing as a [[Green New Deal]] is a plan to bring together the need to get off [[Fossil fuel|fossil fuels]] in the next decade to radically decarbonize our energy system,.. to marry that huge infrastructure investment in the next green economy with a plan to battle [[poverty]], to create huge numbers of good, union, green jobs, to take care of people. It’s a plan to have [[w:Universal_healthcare|universal public healthcare]] and child care and a jobs guarantee. So it’s all the things that are not happening in Texas, because there isn’t just this extreme weather, which many [[scientists]] believe is linked to [[Earth|our warming planet]] — you know, you can’t link one storm with [[climate change]], but the patterns are very clear, and this should be a wake-up call — but Texas is also suffering a pandemic of [[Poverty in the United States|poverty]], of exclusion, of [[Racism in the United States|racial injustice]]...  we’ve heard this messaging, I think, because of panic, frankly, because the Green New Deal is a plan that could solve so many of Texas’s problems and the problems across the country, and [[Republican Party (United States)|Republicans]] have absolutely nothing to offer except for more [[w:Deregulation|deregulation]], more [[privatization]], more [[austerity]]. And so they have been frantically seeking to deflect from the real causes of this crisis, which is an intersection of extreme weather, of the kind that we are seeing more of because of climate change, intersecting with a deregulated, fossil fuel-based energy system.
**[[Naomi Klein]], [https://www.democracynow.org/2021/2/22/naomi_klein_texas_green_new_deal Fossil Fuel Shock Doctrine: Naomi Klein on Deadly Deregulation &amp; Why Texas Needs the Green New Deal,] ''Democracy Now!'' (22 February 2021)

*One in four Texans lacks health insurance, the highest proportion in the nation.
** Paul Krugman, [http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2011/aug/15/paul-krugman/one-four-texans-lack-health-insurance/ ''The New York Times''] (15 August 2011).

===M===
*'''I can see that lone star from a thousand miles away calling me back home though I've ventured far astray. When I see that beacon shining for me all alone, it calls me back to Texas and to home.'''
**Tony Marcus, [http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Lone_Star_(song) &quot;Lone Star&quot;] (1998), ''Swingin' Out West''

* The pattern of abuses in [[w:Uvalde_County,_Texas|Uvalde County]] is strikingly reminiscent of the Deep South of the early 1960s. The Civil Rights Commission's study documents that duly registered [[Mexican Americans|Chicano]] voters are not being placed on the voting lists; that election judges are selectively and deliberately invalidating ballots cast by minority voters; that election judges are refusing to aid minority voters who are illiterate in [[English language|English]]; that the tax assessor-collector of Uvalde County, who is responsible for registering voters, refuses to name members of minority groups as deputy registrars; that the Uvalde County tax assessor repeatedly runs out of registration application cards when minority voter applicants ask for them; that the Uvalde County tax assessor-collector refuses to register voter applicants based on the technicality that the application was filed on a printed card bearing a previous year's date. Other abuses were uncovered by the study of the Civil Rights Commission in Uvalde County, and elsewhere in Texas: Widespread [[w:Gerrymandering|gerrymandering]] with the purpose of diluting minority voting strength; systematic drawing of at-large electoral districts with this same purpose and design; maintenance of polling places exclusively in areas inaccessible to minority voters; excessive firing fees to run for political office
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

* In Texas, as many of you know, children were required to be educated in either the white or the colored school. Officials in Texas, and I have in mind Pecos County and Nueces County, which have large percentages of [[Mexican Americans|Mexican American]] people, could not decide whether Mexican Americans were white or colored, so we got no schools. In most other schools, as in Uvalde, we were in fact put into a third category of school, called the Mexican school.
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

* In order to prevail in Texas, we have to argue what is now known as the northern de jure [[Racial segregation|segregation]] cases. We culled through the school board minutes going back to 1919. We traced the development of their school construction policies, their school assignment policies. We noticed that even toys were provided on the basis of [[race]]; twice the amount was spent for children in the Anglo schools as for children in the Mexican school, even though there were double the number of children in the Mexican schools as in the Anglo schools.
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

*The crisis stemmed from a unique confluence of weaknesses in the state’s power system.  Texas is the only state in the continental United States with an independent and isolated grid. That allows the state to avoid federal regulation - but also severely limits its ability to draw emergency power from other grids. ERCOT also operates the only major U.S. grid that does not have a capacity market - a system that provides payments to operators to be on standby to supply power during severe weather events. This week’s cold snap left 4.5 million... without power. More than 14.5 million Texans endured a related water-supply crisis as pipes froze and burst. About 65,000 customers remained without power as of Saturday afternoon, even as temperatures started to rise, according to website PowerOutage.US.   State health officials have linked more than two dozen deaths to the power crisis. Some died from hypothermia or possible carbon monoxide poisoning caused by portable generators running in basements and garages without enough ventilation. Officials say they suspect the death count will rise as more bodies are discovered.
** [https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-weather-texas-power-insight-idUSKBN2AL00N Tim McLaughlin, Stephanie Kelly,  Why a predictable cold snap crippled the Texas power grid], ''Reuters News Service'', (20 February 2021)
 
*Don't mess with Texas!
** Tim McClure, [http://www.dontmesswithtexas.org/ ''Texas Department of Transportation''] (1985).

* When MacNab blanched, no more stunned than I, Rusk rose and put his arm about his shoulders: &quot;'''Never forget, son, when you represent Texas, always go first class.'''&quot;
** [[James Michener]], ''Texas'' (1985), Closing line

* Whether they are sitting in the plush Driskill Hotel in Austin or some god-awful motel in Waco, Texans firmly maintain that they have the biggest-and-best-of-everything. This bragging does not always make other people love Texas, even in the West. (When, back in the early 1980s, one of us broke down in a car with Texas plates in southern [[Colorado]], nobody stopped to help for what seemed like an eternity; the man who eventually did explained: &quot;You should have had a sign saying you weren't from Texas.&quot;)
** [[John Micklethwait]] and [[Adrian Wooldridge]], &quot;For Texas, Business and God&quot; (2004), ''[[The Right Nation]]'', {{ISBN|1-59420-020-3}}.

*Welcome to the 2-1-4. Big be, D Texas. Let Mr. Sexes flex this Lexus and this where the Cowboys play; they battle with my team from the bay. Frisco, now I'm from the Northwest. But, I likes my soul food, so I'm calling up an old groove and I'm a brother with a gut and don't forget about San Anton'. The last time I went through, I took three broads home and much love love to the brothers in Austin and the 5-1-2. I'm flossing in Lawston; a state that's as big as hell.
**[[Sir Mix-a-Lot]], [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gI9I7GXdA4&amp;feature=youtu.be &quot;Jump on It&quot;] (1996), ''Return of the Bumpasaurus'', Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Regent Music Corporation

* [[Friendship]].
** Motto of the State of Texas.

===P===
*Texans would be without [[electricity]] for longer than three days to keep the [[Federal government of the United States|federal government]] out of their [[business]].
**[[Rick Perry]], quoted in [https://www.democracynow.org/2021/2/22/naomi_klein_texas_green_new_deal Fossil Fuel Shock Doctrine: Naomi Klein on Deadly Deregulation &amp; Why Texas Needs the Green New Deal,] ''Democracy Now!'' (22 February 2021)

* Honor the Texas flag; I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state under God, one and indivisible.
** [[w:Flag of Texas# Pledge of allegiance|Pledge of allegiance to the state flag]] as amended in 2007. Chapter 3100, Sections 3100.101–3100.104 of the Texas Government Code, as reported by [http://www.tsl.state.tx.us/ref/abouttx/flagpledge.html Texas State Library and Archives Commission.]&lt;!-- &quot;indivisible&quot; reflects a historical contradiction: Texas is one of two states admitted to the union with an express provision for dividing into multiple states. California is the other. --&gt;

===R===
*My gut tells me there is something fishy going on in Texas.
**William O. Ritchie, [http://www.cnn.com/2016/02/16/politics/antonin-scalia-autopsy-death-conspiracy-theories/index.html ''Facebook'' post] (14 February 2016).

* Your whole history, from the days of [[w:Stephen_F._Austin|Austin]] and [[Sam Houston|Houston]] and [[Davy Crockett]] right to the present time, shows what splendid fighting material the average Texan makes. But I do not care how good the material, it is not going to amount to much if it is not given a chance. It is a most important thing for all of us, if we desire to keep the regular army small, that we shall have the militia, the [[w:United_States_National_Guard|National Guard]] of the several States, kept up to a proper point. Last year, I am happy to be able to say, at the maneuvers of the regulars, your Texas troops did admirably. I have been told again and again how well they did. I want to congratulate you upon the excellent law for the administration of the National Guard that has been passed by the [[w:Texas_legislature|Texas legislature]]. I feel very much at home here.
** [[Theodore Roosevelt]], [https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/address-the-texas-state-legislature-austin Address to the Texas State Legislature in Austin Online], The American Presidency Project, 6 April 1905 

===S===
*I would never go back to South Texas. They call where I grew up 'The Valley' and there's some nice scenery and stuff. But damn, there's not a lot to do.
**Megan Salinas, as quoted in [https://web.archive.org/web/20160224052941/http://archive.li/YCqhD/dda8bb0d02fe73ab2391e6a84dbe093678a01d23/scr.png &quot;Megan Salinas&quot;] (August 2013), ''HUSTLER''

*Texas was a wonderful, open-armed place for us to come. We've never regretted it for a second. I would defend Texas to the hilt everywhere. Certainly not all things about it, and I think San Antonio has some very serious problems with [[Economic growth|growth]] and &quot;[[progress]]&quot;... Texas has been a great, uplifting place to be. I think we have a wide margin on the page here, which for writers is helpful.
**[[Naomi Shihab Nye]], in ''Conversations with the World'' by Phebe Davidson (1998)

* If I owned Texas and [[Hell]], I would rent Texas and live in Hell.
** Attributed to [[Philip Sheridan]]

* Texas is a state of mind. Texas is an obsession. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. And there’s an opening convey of generalities. A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner... Sectional [[American football|football]] games have the glory and the despair of war, and when a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners.
** [[John Steinbeck]], pt. 4, ''Travels With Charley: In Search of America'' (1962).

* [[Saskatchewan]] is much like Texas; except it's more friendly to the [[United States]].
** Attributed to [[Adlai Stevenson]]. This was attributed to Stevenson without reference in 1001 Greatest Things Ever Said About Texas (2006) by Donna Ingham, p. 92. It was also attributed without reference in &quot;Reporters' Notebook&quot;, The Buffalo News, September 24, 1992. No closer connection to Stevenson has been found.

* '''All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is the place I dearly love to be. But, all my exes live in Texas.'''
**George Strait, as quoted in [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jk7uXaNuWNE &quot;All my Ex's live in Texas&quot;] (10 April 1987), written by Sanger D. Shafer and Linda J. Shafer

===T===
*We favor strengthening our common American identity and loyalty, which includes the contribution and assimilation of different racial and ethnic groups.
**[https://web.archive.org/web/20140619231738/http://www.texasgop.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/2014-Platform-Final.pdf ''Texan Republican Party Platform of 2014''] (June 2014), by the Republican Party of Texas.

*Here are four facts about cowboy hats you might not know. The first fact is, just like guns in Texas; there are more cowboy hats than there are people here. That's because most cowboy hat wearers have more than one hat and avid cowboy hat wearers have more than five. Really addicted cowboy hat wearers have more than ten hats and 20 boots. The second fact is one of the most often quoted sayings in Texas is, 'Where did you get that hat?' The second most quoted saying is, 'Don't touch my hat!'
**Ralph D. Thomas, [https://web.archive.org/web/20150216113600/http://www.indianvillagemall.com/hats/hatquestions.html &quot;Everything You Wanted To Know About Cowboy Hats But Didn't Know Who To Ask&quot;] (2015), ''Indian Village Mall''

*Cowboy and Western hats have become status symbols. Most Texans and Westerners who are fine hat wearers can spot a cheap hat a block or more away! Remember that in Texas, one of the most often quoted questions is &quot;where did you get that hat?&quot; This question could have several meanings from the person asking. It if often asked when one really admires the hat on the head of the person the question is directed too. It is sometimes used on a wanta-be cowboy who just purchased a really cheap hat which stands out like a sore thumb to those who know them. It is also sometimes asked as the asker simply doesn't like the hat but that is an individual and personal thing. Now that you too have become somewhat of an expert on cowboy hats, below is the famous Tribal And Western Impressions hat selections. We will start out with two short videos from our personal picks cowboy hats for men and our personal picks cowgirl hats for the ladies.
**Ralph D. Thomas, [https://web.archive.org/web/20150216113600/http://www.indianvillagemall.com/hats/hatquestions.html &quot;Everything You Wanted To Know About Cowboy Hats But Didn't Know Who To Ask&quot;] (2015), ''Indian Village Mall''

*The province of Texas is still part of the Mexican dominions, but it will soon contain no [[Mexicans]]; the same thing has occurred whenever the Anglo-Americans have come into contact with populations of a different origin.
**[[Alexis de Tocqueville]], ''Democracy in America'' (1835)

===W===
*A funny thing has happened to the economic miracle in Texas that [[Liberalism|liberals]] predicted would go bust along with oil prices. America's foremost state job creator of the past decade continues to produce [[opportunity]] and [[employment]]. Last week's 'beige book' release from the [[Federal Reserve System|Federal Reserve]] Bank of Dallas shows that despite the struggling oil and gas industry, the Texas economy is still enjoying moderate growth.
**''The Wall Street Journal'', [http://www.wsj.com/articles/no-economic-mess-in-texas-1437433836 &quot;No Economic Mess in Texas: Oil prices collapse but the Lone Star State keeps creating jobs&quot;] (20 July 2015)

* I'm a rolling stone from Texas&lt;br&gt;Rolling stone from the plains&lt;br&gt;I'm a rolling stone from Texas, boy&lt;br&gt;I long to be back there again
** Don Walser, &quot;Rolling Stone From Texas&quot;, ''Rolling Stone From Texas'' (1994)

* '''They say a rolling stone never gathers no moss'''&lt;br&gt;'''As long as it's rolling along'''&lt;br&gt;'''Oh, but I don't care if I've gathered any moss'''&lt;br&gt;'''If it's in my Texas home'''
** Don Walser, &quot;Rolling Stone From Texas&quot;, ''Rolling Stone From Texas'' (1994)

*Last Wednesday the citizens of this city and vicinity, native Texans, assembled in the fairgrounds to commemorate the thirtieth anniversary if the liberation of the bonded [[African American|Afro-American]] of Texas. After indulging in various pleasures, they were called to the sumptuous repasts that were spread by our energetic ladies and our worthy citizen and coadjuntor, R. B. Floyd. At 3:30 the people were called together in the amphitheater to hear the speakers of the day. The exercises were opened by the song, “Hold the Fort,” led by Presiding Elder, A. M. Ward; prayer, led by Rev. J. R. Ransom; 'John Brown's Body' was then led by Rev. Ward; E. W. Dorsey then stated why the 19th of June was celebrated. He was followed by S. O. Clayton, who in an address of twenty minutes delivered volumes of words which were impregnated with varied and bright thoughts. Closely following the speakers an animated game of base ball was witnessed; when the happy throng repaired to their homes expressing themselves highly pleased with their first Juneteenth celebration.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2014/06/22/a-juneteenth-follow-up/ ''Weekly Blade''] (22 June 1895), Parsons, Kansas

*Why should we as Texans want to be reminded of [[Confederate States of America|a legalized system of involuntary servitude, dehumanization, rape, mass murder]]?
**[[w:Royce West|Royce West]] (2011), as quoted in [http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-fix/wp/2015/06/18/the-supreme-court-just-dealt-the-confederate-flag-a-blow-heres-how/?tid=pm_politics_pop_b &quot;The Supreme Court Just Dealt the Confederate Flag a Blow, Here's How&quot;] (June 2015), ''The Washington Post''.

*As the roll call proceeded, and vote after vote was recorded in the affirmative, the spectators in the gallery broke into applause. Seventy delegates responded “aye” before there was a single negative vote. Then the name of Thomas P. Hughes of Williamson county was called. “No!” came the response. The effect was electrical. Immediately there was a demonstration of disapproval among the spectators, but order was quickly restored and the roll call proceeded. The next three votes were in the affirmative and there was applause. The secretary then called the name of William H. Johnson of Lamar county. He voted “no,” and again there was a demonstration of disapproval. Quiet was no sooner obtained, however, than the name of Joshua Johnson of Titus county was called, and he, too, voted in the negative. A roar of disapproval went up, but the chairman demanded order and the next name was called.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*The response was in the affirmative and the crowd applauded. Then there were sixty-four “ayes” in succession before another negative vote was cast. The spectators applauded popular favorites as they announced their votes. Reagan, the brilliant member of congress, was cheered. There were cheers also for Runnels, the former governor, whom Houston had defeated at the previous election. And so it went. Finally the secretary called out, “Shuford! ” This was A. P. Shuford of Wood county. He voted in the negative and there was a flutter of disapproval. Eight more affirmative votes came next, and then the secretary reached the name of James W. Throckmorton of Collin county. Throckmorton arose. “Mr. President,” he said, speaking in tones that were audible throughout the hall, “in view of the responsibility, in the presence of God and my country — and unawed by the wild spirit of revolution around me, I vote “no.” For the first time the Unionists in the audience found their voices, and there was scattered cheering. But the expressions of disapproval were more pronounced and hisses came from all parts of the gallery. Throckmorton again addressed the chair. “Mr. President,” he said, “when the rabble hiss, well may patriots tremble!” A mighty shout went up from the gallery. Only a small percentage of the crowd was Unionist in sentiment, but, small as it was, it spontaneously responded to Throckmorton’s declaration.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*Above the hoots and jeers there was prolonged cheering, and it was with extreme difficulty that President Roberts restored order. Two other delegates, L. H. Williams and George W. Wright, both of Lamar county, voted “no” before the close of the roll call. Then the result was announced and both the delegates and the spectators broke into cheers. Out of one hundred and seventy- four delegates, only seven had voted against the ordinance. An impromptu procession, which included a number of ladies, entered the hall, led by George M. Flournoy, who carried a beautiful Lone Star flag. A wild frenzy of cheering followed, and it continued for several minutes as the flag was installed in a place of honor over the platform. Texas had taken the first step toward reassuming her independent station.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*The news got abroad in the town, and everywhere there was wild enthusiasm. Only the few who disapproved the action and who felt that evil days were ahead failed to join in the rejoicing. Among the latter were the seven delegates who voted against the ordinance. It had taken a superior order of courage for them to face that unfriendly crowd and vote their convictions, for they could not fail to know that the attitude of the crowd represented the attitude of an overwhelming majority of the people of the state. They were conscious of the fact that they had participated in a historic proceeding and had made themselves conspicuous by the part they had played. They believed the time would come when their votes would be judged otherwise than they were judged by the crowd that jeered them. In order to leave a lasting record of the event, therefore, they decided to have themselves photographed in a group. This they did in due course. The photograph is reproduced in this volume (see page 342), thus being printed in a book for the first time, sixty-six years after the event it commemorates.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*&lt;p&gt;“I accept your good wishes and your resignation. And you can go to hell, Dave Hull.”&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;Dave went to Texas.&lt;/p&gt;
** [[w:Richard Wilson (author)|Richard Wilson]], ''The Girls from Planet 5'' (1955), Chapter 1

==See also==
*[[:Category:Texans|Texans]]
* [[Ivan Edwards]]

==External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Wiktionary}}
{{Wikivoyage}}
{{commons}}
*{{Official website|http://www.texasonline.com/portal/tol}}
* [https://floatiesaustin.com/ Explore Family, Group &amp; Party Boat Rentals on Lake Austin, Texas]
[[Category:Texas| ]]
[[Category:Former countries]]</text>
      <sha1>3eg2789imi6wbqjrdg2rb828p32etgc</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965175</id>
      <parentid>3965173</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:44:48Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>C00lnameig123</username>
        <id>3350172</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>just added some links to niche cities and ERCOT following up my last edit.</comment>
      <origin>3965175</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="59795" sha1="2mb1wt00g50jj31xfgzozc493s0ha62" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Flag of Texas.svg|thumb|All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is the place I dearly love to be. But, all my exes live in Texas. ~ George Strait]]
[[File:Seal of Texas.svg|thumb|Friendship! ~ ''Motto of the State of Texas'']]
'''[[w:Texas|Texas]]''', officially the '''State of Texas''', is the second largest [[w:U.S. state|state]] in the [[United States]] by both [[w:List of U.S. states and territories by area|area]] and [[w:List of U.S. states and territories by population|population]]. Geographically located in the [[w:South Central United States|south central]] part of the country, Texas shares borders with the other US states of [[Louisiana]] to the east, [[Arkansas]] to the northeast, [[Oklahoma]] to the north, [[w:New Mexico|New Mexico]] to the west, and the [[w:States of Mexico|Mexican states]] of [[w:Chihuahua (state)|Chihuahua]], [[w:Coahuila|Coahuila]], [[w:Nuevo León|Nuevo León]], and [[w:Tamaulipas|Tamaulipas]] to the southwest, while the [[w:Gulf of Mexico|Gulf of Mexico]] is to the southeast. Its state government is currently controlled by the [[Republican Party (United States)|Republican Party]], and its current governor is [[Greg Abbott]].

Texas was originally a territory of [[Mexico]] which seceded in the [[w:Texas_Revolution|Texas Revolution]] and was [[w:Texas_annexation|annexed by the United States]] at the beginning of the [[Mexican–American War]]. It also joined the [[Confederate States of America]] during the [[American Civil War]]. [[Houston]] is the [[w:List of cities in Texas by population|most populous city]] in Texas and the [[w:List of United States cities by population|fourth largest]] in the US, while [[w:San Antonio|San Antonio]] is the second most populous in the state and seventh largest in the US. [[w:Dallas–Fort Worth metroplex|Dallas–Fort Worth]] and [[w:Greater Houston|Greater Houston]] are the fourth and fifth largest [[w:List of Metropolitan Statistical Areas|metropolitan statistical areas]] in the country, respectively. Other major cities include [[w:Austin, Texas|Austin]], the second most populous [[w:List of capitals in the United States|state capital]] in the US, and [[w:El Paso, Texas|El Paso]]. Texas is nicknamed the ''Lone Star State'' to signify its former status as an independent republic, and as a reminder of the state's struggle for independence from [[Mexico]].

[[File:Texas flag map.svg|thumb|I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state! ~ ''Pledge of allegiance to the flag of the State of Texas'']]
[[File:Big Spring State Park Pavilion 2009.jpg|thumb|I can see that 'Lone Star' from a thousand miles away calling me back home though I've ventured far astray. When I see that beacon shining for me all alone, it calls me back to Texas and to home. ~ Tony Marcus]]
[[File:Cowboy Hats.jpg|thumb|Like guns in Texas; there are more cowboy hats than there are people here. That's because most cowboy hat wearers have more than one hat and avid cowboy hat wearers have more than five. Really addicted cowboy hat wearers have more than ten hats and 20 boots. ~ Ralph D. Thomas]]
[[File:MVI 2960 Campfire scene at TX Cowboy Hall of Fame.jpg|thumb|One of the most often quoted sayings in Texas is, 'Where did you get that hat?' The second most quoted saying is, 'Don't touch my hat!' ~ Ralph D. Thomas]]
[[File:CornmealProducts.jpg|thumb|Mariachi music, folklorika dancing and an ample supply of Mexican food. For a little while, it was just like being in Texas again. Growing up in Texas gave me many things I'm thankful for... In Texas, it's in the air you breathe.  ~ [[George W. Bush]]]]
[[File:Houston night life.jpg|thumb|The stars at night are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas. ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Houston_Ship_Channel.jpg|thumb|Don't try to knock us baby; don't try to hate. That's how we do it in that Lone Star state; get it straight. ~ [[w:Bun B|Bernard Freeman]]]]
[[File:Altamira Oriole icterus gularis Bentsen State Park, South Texas.jpg|thumb|The prairie sky is wide and high, deep in the heart of Texas. The sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas. ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Cityscape of McAllen, Texas.jpg|thumb|Texas; prettiest place in the world. ~ [[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]]]
[[File:Hidalgo County Courthouse.jpg|thumb|I want to wake up in Texas, I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies. ~ [[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]]]
[[File:US_Highway_83_in_McAllen,_Texas.jpg|thumb|Texas has four seasons. Drought, Flood, Blizzard and Twister. ~ Anonymous]]
[[File:United States and Texas Flags.jpg|thumb|A mighty American name? I can't think of a better name than Texas. ~ [[Laura Bush]]]]
[[File:2002 Olympic Torch Relay George W Bush.jpg|thumb|Some folks look at me and see swagger, which in [[w:Texas|Texas]] is called 'walking'. ~ [[George W. Bush]]]]
[[File:HrlVIA.jpg|thumb|When you represent Texas, always go first class. ~ [[James Michener]]]]
[[File:Texascowboys.jpg|thumb|The cowboys cry, ''{{'}}Ki-yip-pee-yi!{{'}}'', deep in the heart of Texas. The doggies bawl, and bawl and bawl, deep in the heart of Texas! ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Amarillo Texas Downtown.jpg|thumb|When I'm so far from you, Texas? All I can do is cry. ~ Sandy Cheeks]]
[[File:Texas quarter, reverse side, 2004.png|thumb|A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner. ~ [[John Steinbeck]]]]
[[File:2007 Tech at Texas Flag.jpg|thumb|When a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners. ~ [[John Steinbeck]]]]
[[File:US Navy 100215-N-8848T-824 The first Navy Sailors to participate in the Secretary of Defense's Military Accessions Vital to National Interest pilot program.jpg|thumb|We favor strengthening our common American identity and loyalty, which includes the contribution and assimilation of different racial and ethnic groups. ~ ''Texan Republican Party Platform of 2014'']]
[[File:Copper Breaks State Park View.jpg|thumb|I'm a rolling stone from Texas&lt;br&gt;Rolling stone from the plains&lt;br&gt;I'm a rolling stone from Texas, boy&lt;br&gt;I long to be back there again ~ Don Walser]]
[[File:Daingerfield sp lake.jpg|thumb|They say a rolling stone never gathers no moss&lt;br&gt;As long as it's rolling along&lt;br&gt;Oh, but I don't care if I've gathered any moss&lt;br&gt;If it's in my Texas home ~ Don Walser]]

__NOTOC__
{{TOCalpha}}

==Quotes==
===A===
*Texas will see you in court [[Joe Biden|Mr President]].
**Abbott to DOJ suit over border [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4dj7zvFmDY]{{fix cite|date=November 2025}}
* Texas has four seasons... Drought, flood, blizzard, and twister.
** Anonymous proverb, as quoted in [http://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/texas_has_four_seasons_drought_flood_blizzard_and_twister/ ''The Big Apple'']

*Texas was a logical slave state. Her geographical latitude, her climate, her industrial opportunities aligned her among those divisions of the world who were the last to break away from an institution which had been fastened upon both barbarism and civilization from times unrecorded.
** [https://books.google.com/books?id=b1tNAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA193 ''A Twentieth Century History of Southwest Texas: Illustrated''] (1907), &quot;The Civil War Period&quot;, Volume 1, New York: The Lewis Publishing Company, p. 197

===B===
*[[Conservatism|Conservatives]] look to Texas as their bright shining light. They hold it up as a model of limited government, where low [[Taxation in the United States|taxes]] and [[business]]-friendly [[regulation]] have led to job growth and [[economic growth]] surpassing the [[Economy of the United States|national average]] over the last three decades. If the rest of the country followed the Texas model, the tale goes, our economic woes would be behind us and we would all share in a more prosperous future. The conservatives do have at least the beginnings of a case. Texas has outstripped the rest of the country in job creation. Since the [[business cycle]] peak in 1981, the number of jobs in Texas has increased by more than 78 percent. That compares with less than 52 percent for the country as a whole. The gains are not just [[oil]], although oil is a big part of the picture. If we chose the business cycle peak in 2000, when oil prices were low, as the basis of comparison, then the Texas job growth story would be less impressive. It beats national job growth by just 1.1 percent. 47.1 for Texas and 46.0 for the U.S. Hot air — or to be more generous, a warm climate — is also a big part of the story. 
**Dean Baker, [https://web.archive.org/web/20140616034836/http://america.aljazeera.com/opinions/2014/6/texas-miracle-economyjobswages.html &quot;Tall tales about Texas&quot;] (13 June 2014), ''Al-Jazeera America''

*Job growth in Texas has substantially exceeded growth in [[California]], which also has the benefit of a warm climate. This provides a clear political contrast, since California has become one of the most [[Democratic Party (United States)|Democratic]] states in the country, while Texas has become one of the most Republican. Red-state Texas easily bests blue-state California in the job growth contest since 1981, 78 to 59 percent. But the main reason for this gap is simply that the states are not playing the same game. Texas has consciously promoted development... Texas has more and cheaper [[House|housing]] than California. Just to take a couple of examples. The fair market rent for a two-bedroom apartment in [[Los Angeles|Los Angeles County]] is $1,398 a month, according to the [[w:United_States_Department_of_Housing_and_Urban_Development|Department of Housing and Urban Development]]. By contrast, in Harris County, Texas, which includes Houston, it’s just $926. The fair market rent for a two-bedroom apartment in Santa Clara County, which includes San Jose, is $1,649 a month. It was just $894 in Dallas County in 2010, the most recent year available. The gaps are even larger for home sale prices.
**Dean Baker, [https://web.archive.org/web/20140616034836/http://america.aljazeera.com/opinions/2014/6/texas-miracle-economyjobswages.html &quot;Tall tales about Texas&quot;] (13 June 2014), ''Al-Jazeera America''

*The [[Democratic Party (United States)|Democratic Party]]'s favorite hobbies are winning, [[w:Texas|Texas]] and exhaustion. 
** [[Russell Baker]], &quot;[http://select.nytimes.com/gst/abstract.html?res=F30911FA3E5F127A93C0AB1783D85F4C8685F9 Observer: The Democrats in a Nutshell]&quot;, ''The New York Times'' (22 August 1968) Baker's predictions came true with appearance of the [[w:New Covenant (politics)|New Covenant]] and the [http://www.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,20081124,00.html New New Deal]

*Having lived in Texas as a youth and been forced to study Texas history, I thought I knew the story of its admission to the Union pretty well. But I never knew the profound importance of race to that history. In particular, I did not know that [[Mexico]] had abolished [[slavery]] and that this was a key reason for the war for Texas independence. The Texans were determined to keep their slaves and were willing to fight to the death for that right. And of course, the admission of Texas as a state was critical to the maintenance of [[slavery in the United States]], which was threatened both economically and politically in the 1840s.
**[[w:Bruce Bartlett|Bruce Bartlett]], [https://books.google.com/books?id=vb3Mx7GqAmwC&amp;printsec=frontcover&amp;dq=isbn:9780230600621&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=0CB4Q6AEwAGoVChMIi92Er-SPxwIVhnQ-Ch3plQCk#v=onepage&amp;q&amp;f=false ''Wrong on Race: The Democratic Party's Buried Past''] (2008), p. x

*in 1836, when Texas won its independence from Mexico, [[Andrew Jackson|President Jackson]] stated that annexing the Republic of Texas would expand America's &quot;area of freedom&quot; and extend its &quot;circle of free institutions.&quot; However, the conception of [[freedom]] being articulated by the Anglo [[settlers]] of the Texas republic was deeply [[Racism in the United States|racialized]]: not only were most settlers originally from the [[w:Deep_South|Deep South]] but many were &quot;land speculators, slavers, militia leaders, and Indian killers.&quot;
**[[Cristina Beltrán]] ''Cruelty as Citizenship: How Migrant Suffering Sustains White Democracy'' (2020) p 66

*Everything is bigger in Texas, including economic growth. Texas was America's second fastest growing economy.
**Ananya Bhattacharya, [http://money.cnn.com/2015/06/10/news/economy/texas-big-economic-growth-2014/ &quot;Is Texas America's best state economy?&quot;] (10 June 2015), ''CNN Money''

* You don't get everything you want. A dictatorship would be a lot easier.
** [[George W. Bush]], responding to the difficulties of governing Texas, as quoted in [http://www.governing.com/archive/1998/jul/bush.txt &quot;The Taming of Texas&quot;], ''Governing Magazine'' (July 1998)

*We celebrated a little early at the White House this year, on quatro de Mayo, with a fiesta on the South Lawn. With the mariachi music, folklorika dancing and an ample supply of Mexican food. For a little while, it was just like being in Texas again. Growing up in Texas gave me many things I'm thankful for. And one of them is an appreciation of the Hispanic culture. In Texas, it's in the air you breathe; Hispanic life, Hispanic culture and Hispanic values are inseparable from the life of our state, and have been for many generations. The history of Mexican-American relations has had its troubled moments, but today our peoples enrich each other in trade and culture and family ties.
** [[George W. Bush]], [https://web.archive.org/web/20010507184032/http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2001/05/20010505-1.html radio address] (5 May 2001)

*My fellow Americans, this day has brought terrible news and great sadness to our country. At 9:00 a.m. this morning, Mission Control in [[Houston]] lost contact with our Space Shuttle ''Columbia''. A short time later, debris was seen falling from the skies above Texas. The ''Columbia'' is lost; there are no survivors.
** [[George W. Bush]], [https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Columbia_Space_Shuttle_Tragedy_Speech remarks after ''Columbia'' space shuttle disaster, televised remarks] (1 February 2003)

* Some folks look at me and see swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking'.
** [[George W. Bush]], accepting the Republican nomination for President in New York City (September 2004). Reported in [http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/13/magazine/13safire.html ''The New York Times'']

*A mighty [[United States Navy|American submarine]] deserves a mighty American name. I can't think of a better name than Texas. Skilled professionals will forge the newest alloys and technology into one of the most sophisticated [[ships]] in the world. The Texas will represent America's iron fist, which our country uses to protect our [[Citizenship|citizens]]; and to help our neighbors and allies around the world.
**[[Laura Bush]], [https://web.archive.org/web/20051029095258/http://www.nn.northropgrumman.com/news/2002/020712_ngnn_lays_keel_of_virginia_class.pdf speech at Newport News, Virginia] (12 July 2002)

===C===
*When Texas became one of the United States, she entered into an indissoluble relation. All the obligations of perpetual union, and all the guaranties of [[Republic|republican government]] in the [[Union (United States)|Union]], attached at once to the state. The Act which consummated her admission into the Union was something more than a compact; it was the incorporation of a new member into the political body. And it was final.
**[[Salmon P. Chase]], [http://blog.constitutioncenter.org/2012/11/constitution-check-can-texas-get-constitutional-permission-to-leave-the-union/ ''Texas v. White'']

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': Can't you see? It's Texas... Wish I was in Texas, prettiest place in the world... I want to wake up in Texas, I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies. Oh, why? When I'm so far from you, Texas? All I can do is cry.
:*[http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Texas_(song) &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''Patrick Star''': What's so great about dumb old Texas?
:*[http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Texas_(song) &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': Don't you dare take the name of Texas in vain! 
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''SpongeBob Squarepants''': We can't say anything bad about dumb old Texas?
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''Patrick Star''': Then, can we say people from Texas are dumb?
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': No, you can't say nothing about Texas! 
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''SpongeBob Squarepants''': The stars at night are dull and dim, whenever they have to be over dumb old stupid Texas!
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLLzoge50f0 &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

* The westward tide rolled on, bearing with it new problems of adjustment. The generation of the 1840’s saw their culmination. During these years there took place the annexation of Texas, a [[Mexican–American War|war with Mexico]], the conquest of [[California]], and the settlement of the [[Oregon]] boundary with [[British Empire|Great Britain]]. Adventurous Americans in search of land and riches had been since 1820 crossing the [[w:Mexico-United_States_border|Mexican boundary]] into the Texas country, which belonged to the Republic of Mexico, freed from [[Spain]] - in 1821. While this community was growing, American sailors on the Pacific coast, captains interested in the [[China]] trade, established themselves in the ports of the Mexican Province of California. Pioneers pushed their way overland in search of skins and furs, and by 1826 reached the mission stations of the Province. The [[Mexicans]], alarmed at the appearance of these settlers, vainly sought to stem the flood; for Mexican Governments were highly unstable, and in distant Provinces their writ hardly ran. But there appeared on the scene a new military dictator, [[w:Antonio_Lopez_de_Santa_Anna|Santa Anna]], determined to strengthen Mexican authority, and at once a revolt broke out. 
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), pp. 110
* In November 1835 the Americans in Texas erected an autonomous state and raised the [[w:Lone_Star_flag|Lone Star flag]]. The Mexicans, under Santa Anna, marched northwards. At the Mission House of the Alamo in March 1836 a small body of Texans, fighting to the last man, was exterminated in one of the epic fights of [[History of the United States|American history]] by a superior Mexican force. The whole Province was aroused. Under the leadership of General [[Sam Houston]] from [[Tennessee]] a force was raised, and in savage fighting the Mexican army of Santa Anna was in its turn destroyed and its commander captured at San Jacinto River. The Texans had stormed the positions with the cry “Remember the Alamo!” The independence of Texas was recognised by Santa Anna. His act was repudiated later by the Mexican Government, but their war effort was exhausted, and the Texans organised themselves into a republic, electing Sam Houston as President.
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), pp. 110-111

* For the next ten years the question of the admission of Texas as a state of the Union was a burning issue in [[Politics of the United States|American politics]]. As each new state demanded entry into the Union so the feeling for and against [[Slavery in the United States|slavery]] ran higher. The great [[Abolitionism|Abolitionist]] journalist, [[William Lloyd Garrison]], called for a secession of the Northern states if the slave state of Texas was admitted to the Union. The Southerners, realising that Texan votes would give them a majority in the [[United States Senate|Senate]] if this vast territory was admitted as a number of separate states, clamoured for annexation. The [[Capitalism|capitalists]] of the East were committed, through the formation of land companies, to exploit Texas, and besides the issue of dubious stocks by these bodies vast quantities of paper notes and bonds of the new Texan Republic were floated in the United States. The speculation in these helped to split the political opposition of the Northern states to the annexation. Even more important was the conversion of many Northerners to belief in the “[[Manifest Destiny]]” of the United States. This meant that their destiny was ! to spread across the whole of the [[North America|North American]] continent. The Democratic Party in the election of 1844 called for the occupation of Oregon as well as the annexation of Texas, thus holding out to the North the promise of Oregon as a counterweight to Southern Texas. The victory of the Democratic candidate, [[James K. Polk]], was interpreted as a mandate for admitting Texas, and this was done by joint resolution of Congress in February 1845.
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), p. 111

*The [[equality]] of all persons before the law is herein recognized, and shall ever remain inviolate; nor shall any citizen ever be deprived of any right, privilege, or immunity, nor be exempted from any burdens, or duty, on account of race, color, or previous condition.
**Section XXI, [https://web.archive.org/web/20160302122409/http://tarlton.law.utexas.edu/constitutions/texas1869/preamble_a1 ''Constitution of the State of Texas''] (1869)

*[T]he adoption of any system of peonage, whereby the helpless and unfortunate may be reduced to practical bondage, shall never be authorized, or tolerated by laws of the State; and neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a [[punishment]] for [[crime]], whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall ever exist in the State.
**Section XXII, [https://web.archive.org/web/20160302122409/http://tarlton.law.utexas.edu/constitutions/texas1869/preamble_a1 ''Constitution of the State of Texas''] (1869)

*Independence without slavery, would be valueless... The South without slavery would not be worth a mess of pottage.
**[[w:Caleb Cutwell|Caleb Cutwell]], letter to the ''Galvaston Tri-Weekly'' (22 February 1865)

===D===
*We hold as undeniable truths that the governments of the various States, and of the [[Confederate States of America|confederacy]] itself, were established exclusively by the white race, for themselves and their posterity; that the [[Black people|African race]] had no agency in their establishment; that they were rightfully held and regarded as an inferior and dependent race, and in that condition only could their existence in this country be rendered beneficial or tolerable.
** [https://web.archive.org/web/20081107232146/http://avalon.law.yale.edu/19th_century/csa_texsec.asp ''A Declaration of the Causes which Impel the State of Texas to Secede from the Federal Union''] (February 1861).

===E===
*General Orders, No. 3. The people are informed that, in accordance with a proclamation from the [[President of the United States|Executive of the United States]], all slaves are free. This involves an absolute [[Equal rights|equality of personal rights]] and [[Right to property|rights of property]], between former masters and slaves, and the connection heretofore existing between them, becomes that between employer and hired labor. The Freedmen are advised to remain at their present homes, and work for wages. They are informed that they will not be allowed to collect at military posts; and that they will not be supported in idleness either there or elsewhere.
**[[w:F.W. Emery|F.W. Emery]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2015/06/18/juneteenth-history-and-tradition-5/ ''General Orders, No. 3''] (19 June 1865), Galveston, Texas: Headquarters, District of Texas.
===F===
*So don't try to knock us baby, don't try to hate. That's how we do it in that Lone Star state; get it straight.
**[[w:Bun B|Bernard Freeman]], [http://genius.com/Bun-b-draped-up-h-town-mix-feat-the-h-town-all-starz-lyrics &quot;Draped Up&quot;]

===G===
*Formerly, the purchase of Texas by [[Federal government of the United States|our Government]], for the purpose of bestowing it as a gift upon [[African Americans|our colored population]], was a favorite opinion of ours; but we have settled down into the belief, that the object is neither practicable nor expedient. In the first place, it is not probable that the [[United States Congress|Congress]] would make the purchase; nor, secondly, is it likely that the mass of our colored people would remove without some compulsory process; nor, thirdly, would it be safe or convenient to organise them as a distinct nation among us,—an imperium in imperio. The fact is, it is time to repudiate all [[Colonialism|colonization]] schemes, as visionary and unprofitable; all those, we mean, which have for their design [[Racial segregation|the entire separation of the blacks from the whites]]. We must take our free colored and slave inhabitants as we find them—recognise them as countrymen who have extraordinary claims upon our charities—give them the advantages of [[education]]—respect them as members of one great family, who may be made useful in society and honorable in reputation. This is our view of the subject.
**[[William Lloyd Garrison]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2016/03/21/garrison-gives-up-on-colonization/ ''The Liberator''] (22 January 1861)

* Thermopylae had her messenger of defeat—the Alamo had none.
** [[w:Thomas Jefferson Green|Thomas Jefferson Green]], reported in ''Respectfully Quoted: A Dictionary of Quotations'' (1989). Green is said to have included the sentence in a speech he helped [[w:Edward Burleson|Edward Burleson]] prepare. While Burleson has often been credited with originating the sentence as well as using it, he lacked the classical education necessary to have made the allusion. The sentence became popular after it was engraved on the first monument to the Alamo, which is located in Austin, Texas. The 10-foot-high statue, made of stones from the Alamo, was destroyed by fire when the Capitol at Austin burned. Another monument subsequently erected on the Capitol grounds also included the sentence. J. Frank Dobie, &quot;The Alamo’s Immortalization of Words&quot;, ''Southwest Review'' (Summer 1942), p. 406–10.

*I wish for the people of Texas, as I do for the people of the entire [[Southern United States|South]], that they may go on developing their resources, and become great and powerful, and in their prosperity forget, as the worthy Mayor expressed it, that there is a boundary between the North and South. I am sure we will all be happier and much more prosperous when the day comes that there shall be no sectional feeling.
**[[Ulysses S. Grant]], as quoted in [https://books.google.com/books?id=wqJBAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA48 ''Words of Our Hero, Ulysses S. Grant''], p. 56

===H===
*The Confederate Trans-Mississippi Department did not formally surrender until June 2, 1865—''two months'' after the fall of Richmond. During that whole time, except for a few isolated areas, [[w:Texas|Texas]] was not occupied by Union troops and the whole area was in a sort of limbo, still officially in rebellion but without a clear course and without a national leadership. The {{w|U.S. Navy}} officially took possession of Texas on June 5, but did not have soldiers to establish a formal presence. General Granger arrived with troops at Galveston on June 17, and two days later issued a series of administrative notices formally notifying all of Texas that the state was now under formal [[military occupation]], who the key officers and departments were, and so on. The third of these notices was General Order No. 3, that formally announced emancipation under the terms of the [[Emancipation Proclamation]] of January 1, 1863. These notices were published in [[Newspapers|papers]] around the state, first in Galveston and then elsewhere as the news was carried inland by telegraph and railroad.
**[[w:Andy Hall|Andy Hall]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2014/06/22/a-juneteenth-follow-up/ &quot;A Juneteenth Follow-Up&quot;] (22 June 2014), ''Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog''.

*June 5, 1865. Federal forces formally took possession of Texas. Captain Benjamin F. Sands, commanding the division of the West Gulf Blockading Squadron stationed off Galveston, boarded a small Union steamer, USS ''Cornubia'', and entered Galveston harbor, followed by another gunboat, USS ''Preston''. Sands disembarked with a handful of other officers, but took no armed escort, and was met on the wharf by a Confederate officer. The officer escorted the Union men a few blocks to City Hall, where both Sands and the mayor of Galveston addressed a crowd that had gathered there. Both men made assurances of their goodwill and urged the population to go about their business peaceably. Sands told the crowd that he carried a sidearm that day not out of any fear for his own safety but as a sign of respect for the mayor and local officials. Then, along with the mayor, Sands continued on to the old U.S. Customs House, where he &quot;hoisted our flag, which now, at last, was flying over every foot of our territory, this being the closing act of the great rebellion.&quot;
**[[w:Andy Hall|Andy Hall]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2015/06/05/the-closing-act-of-the-great-rebellion/ &quot;The Closing Act of the Great Rebellion&quot;] (5 June 2015), ''Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog''.

* The [[stars]] at [[night]] are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The prairie [[sky]] is wide and high, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;Reminds me of, the one I love, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The [[Coyote|coyotes]] wail, along the trail, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;/br&gt;The [[rabbits]] rush, around the brush, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The cowboys cry, ''{{'}}Ki-yip-pee-yi!{{'}}'', deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The doggies bawl, and bawl and bawl, deep in the heart of Texas!
**June Hershey, [http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=VGF4ibgcHQE#Deep_In_The_Heart_Of_Texas______Song &quot;Deep in the Heart of Texas&quot;] (1941).

* This deadly, frigid, multibillion-dollar chaos in energy-rich Texas was not the result of a polar vortex but a small-minded vortex of [[Right-wing politics|right-wing]] political hokum that puts the interests of a few corporate profiteers over the well-being of the people...  Responding to withering public criticism of the state's chaotic and disastrous response to a killer winter storm, [[Greg Abbott|Abbott]] fumed, &quot;What happened this week to our fellow Texans is absolutely unacceptable.&quot;... Abbott pointed his outrage at ERCOT, the Electric Reliability Council of Texas, the agency charged with maintaining a reliable flow of electricity to Texas homes, schools, businesses, etc.  But... ERCOT merely administers policies set by the Public Utility Commission, and that corporate-cozy body has failed for years to mandate that the state's privatized, for-profit electric utilities weatherize their power generators to prevent freeze-ups. And who appointed the three members of that commission? Why, Greg, it was you! In fact, the chairwoman and one of the two other members of PUC are former top staffers of the governor.
**[[Jim Hightower|Jim Hightower,]] What the Texas Deep Freeze Revealed About Corporate-Run Government, ''Common Dreams'' (24 February 2021)

* The word ''Texas'' is from a native word—or, a [[w:Caddo language|Caddo]] word—meaning &quot;friendly&quot;. So, that means early Texas settlers were like, &quot;Oh! &quot;Friendly&quot;. That's a great one! I'm 'onna call this land Friendly. I like that word. Now, you gotta go! [[wikt:git#Etymology 2|Git]]! It's my land now. Git! Git!
** Laura Horse. ''First Nations Comedy Experience'', episode 1 (9 March 2018)

* Texas will again lift its head and stand among the nations. it ought to do so, for no country upon the globe can compare with it in natural advantages.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* All new states are invested, more or less, by a class of noisy, second-rate men who are always in favor of rash and extreme measures, but Texas was absolutely overrun by such men.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* Texas is lost.
**[[Sam Houston]], as quoted in [http://grandoldpartisan.typepad.com/blog/2016/03/sam-houston.html &quot;Revering Sam Houston, anti-Confederate patriot&quot;] (18 March 2016), by Michael Zak, ''Grand Old Partisan''

* One objection I have heard voiced to works of this kind&amp;mdash;dealing with Texas&amp;mdash;is the amount of gore spilled across the pages. It can not be otherwise. In order to write a realistic and true history of any part of the Southwest, one must narrate such things, even at the risk of monotony.
** [[Robert E. Howard]] in a letter to {{w|August Derleth}} (March 1933).

===J===

* If you haven't climbed up to Enchanted Rock,&lt;br&gt;Drank a cold Shiner down in Luckenbach,&lt;br&gt;Taken your baby to the River Walk,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* If you never caught a trout down in Port A,&lt;br&gt;Heard the words to Corpus Christi Bay,&lt;br&gt;Never seen fireworks on PK,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* Havent had a kolache when you go through West,&lt;br&gt;Never heard of the Larry Jo Taylor fest,&lt;br&gt;Think polished pop country crap sounds the best,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* You say you haven't hiked through Big Bend,&lt;br&gt;Had your hair blown back by a Lubbock wind,&lt;br&gt;Been somewhere where they call you &quot;friend&quot;,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

===K===

*Texas is about as far from a Green New Deal as you can possibly get, seeing as a [[Green New Deal]] is a plan to bring together the need to get off [[Fossil fuel|fossil fuels]] in the next decade to radically decarbonize our energy system,.. to marry that huge infrastructure investment in the next green economy with a plan to battle [[poverty]], to create huge numbers of good, union, green jobs, to take care of people. It’s a plan to have [[w:Universal_healthcare|universal public healthcare]] and child care and a jobs guarantee. So it’s all the things that are not happening in Texas, because there isn’t just this extreme weather, which many [[scientists]] believe is linked to [[Earth|our warming planet]] — you know, you can’t link one storm with [[climate change]], but the patterns are very clear, and this should be a wake-up call — but Texas is also suffering a pandemic of [[Poverty in the United States|poverty]], of exclusion, of [[Racism in the United States|racial injustice]]...  we’ve heard this messaging, I think, because of panic, frankly, because the Green New Deal is a plan that could solve so many of Texas’s problems and the problems across the country, and [[Republican Party (United States)|Republicans]] have absolutely nothing to offer except for more [[w:Deregulation|deregulation]], more [[privatization]], more [[austerity]]. And so they have been frantically seeking to deflect from the real causes of this crisis, which is an intersection of extreme weather, of the kind that we are seeing more of because of climate change, intersecting with a deregulated, fossil fuel-based energy system.
**[[Naomi Klein]], [https://www.democracynow.org/2021/2/22/naomi_klein_texas_green_new_deal Fossil Fuel Shock Doctrine: Naomi Klein on Deadly Deregulation &amp; Why Texas Needs the Green New Deal,] ''Democracy Now!'' (22 February 2021)

*One in four Texans lacks health insurance, the highest proportion in the nation.
** Paul Krugman, [http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2011/aug/15/paul-krugman/one-four-texans-lack-health-insurance/ ''The New York Times''] (15 August 2011).

===M===
*'''I can see that lone star from a thousand miles away calling me back home though I've ventured far astray. When I see that beacon shining for me all alone, it calls me back to Texas and to home.'''
**Tony Marcus, [http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Lone_Star_(song) &quot;Lone Star&quot;] (1998), ''Swingin' Out West''

* The pattern of abuses in [[w:Uvalde_County,_Texas|Uvalde County]] is strikingly reminiscent of the Deep South of the early 1960s. The Civil Rights Commission's study documents that duly registered [[Mexican Americans|Chicano]] voters are not being placed on the voting lists; that election judges are selectively and deliberately invalidating ballots cast by minority voters; that election judges are refusing to aid minority voters who are illiterate in [[English language|English]]; that the tax assessor-collector of Uvalde County, who is responsible for registering voters, refuses to name members of minority groups as deputy registrars; that the Uvalde County tax assessor repeatedly runs out of registration application cards when minority voter applicants ask for them; that the Uvalde County tax assessor-collector refuses to register voter applicants based on the technicality that the application was filed on a printed card bearing a previous year's date. Other abuses were uncovered by the study of the Civil Rights Commission in Uvalde County, and elsewhere in Texas: Widespread [[w:Gerrymandering|gerrymandering]] with the purpose of diluting minority voting strength; systematic drawing of at-large electoral districts with this same purpose and design; maintenance of polling places exclusively in areas inaccessible to minority voters; excessive firing fees to run for political office
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

* In Texas, as many of you know, children were required to be educated in either the white or the colored school. Officials in Texas, and I have in mind Pecos County and Nueces County, which have large percentages of [[Mexican Americans|Mexican American]] people, could not decide whether Mexican Americans were white or colored, so we got no schools. In most other schools, as in Uvalde, we were in fact put into a third category of school, called the Mexican school.
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

* In order to prevail in Texas, we have to argue what is now known as the northern de jure [[Racial segregation|segregation]] cases. We culled through the school board minutes going back to 1919. We traced the development of their school construction policies, their school assignment policies. We noticed that even toys were provided on the basis of [[race]]; twice the amount was spent for children in the Anglo schools as for children in the Mexican school, even though there were double the number of children in the Mexican schools as in the Anglo schools.
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

*The crisis stemmed from a unique confluence of weaknesses in the state’s power system.  Texas is the only state in the continental United States with an independent and isolated grid. That allows the state to avoid federal regulation - but also severely limits its ability to draw emergency power from other grids. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electric%20Reliability%20Council%20of%20Texas ERCOT] also operates the only major U.S. grid that does not have a capacity market - a system that provides payments to operators to be on standby to supply power during severe weather events. This week’s cold snap left 4.5 million... without power. More than 14.5 million Texans endured a related water-supply crisis as pipes froze and burst. About 65,000 customers remained without power as of Saturday afternoon, even as temperatures started to rise, according to website PowerOutage.US.   State health officials have linked more than two dozen deaths to the power crisis. Some died from hypothermia or possible carbon monoxide poisoning caused by portable generators running in basements and garages without enough ventilation. Officials say they suspect the death count will rise as more bodies are discovered.
** [https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-weather-texas-power-insight-idUSKBN2AL00N Tim McLaughlin, Stephanie Kelly,  Why a predictable cold snap crippled the Texas power grid], ''Reuters News Service'', (20 February 2021)
 
*Don't mess with Texas!
** Tim McClure, [http://www.dontmesswithtexas.org/ ''Texas Department of Transportation''] (1985).

* When MacNab blanched, no more stunned than I, Rusk rose and put his arm about his shoulders: &quot;'''Never forget, son, when you represent Texas, always go first class.'''&quot;
** [[James Michener]], ''Texas'' (1985), Closing line

* Whether they are sitting in the plush Driskill Hotel in Austin or some god-awful motel in Waco, Texans firmly maintain that they have the biggest-and-best-of-everything. This bragging does not always make other people love Texas, even in the West. (When, back in the early 1980s, one of us broke down in a car with Texas plates in southern [[Colorado]], nobody stopped to help for what seemed like an eternity; the man who eventually did explained: &quot;You should have had a sign saying you weren't from Texas.&quot;)
** [[John Micklethwait]] and [[Adrian Wooldridge]], &quot;For Texas, Business and God&quot; (2004), ''[[The Right Nation]]'', {{ISBN|1-59420-020-3}}.

*Welcome to the 2-1-4. Big be, D Texas. Let Mr. Sexes flex this Lexus and this where the Cowboys play; they battle with my team from the bay. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frisco,%20Texas Frisco], now I'm from the Northwest. But, I likes my soul food, so I'm calling up an old groove and I'm a brother with a gut and don't forget about [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San%20Antonio San Anton]'. The last time I went through, I took three broads home and much love love to the brothers in [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Austin,%20Texas Austin] and the 5-1-2. I'm flossing in Lawston; a state that's as big as hell.
**[[Sir Mix-a-Lot]], [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gI9I7GXdA4&amp;feature=youtu.be &quot;Jump on It&quot;] (1996), ''Return of the Bumpasaurus'', Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Regent Music Corporation

* [[Friendship]].
** Motto of the State of Texas.

===P===
*Texans would be without [[electricity]] for longer than three days to keep the [[Federal government of the United States|federal government]] out of their [[business]].
**[[Rick Perry]], quoted in [https://www.democracynow.org/2021/2/22/naomi_klein_texas_green_new_deal Fossil Fuel Shock Doctrine: Naomi Klein on Deadly Deregulation &amp; Why Texas Needs the Green New Deal,] ''Democracy Now!'' (22 February 2021)

* Honor the Texas flag; I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state under God, one and indivisible.
** [[w:Flag of Texas# Pledge of allegiance|Pledge of allegiance to the state flag]] as amended in 2007. Chapter 3100, Sections 3100.101–3100.104 of the Texas Government Code, as reported by [http://www.tsl.state.tx.us/ref/abouttx/flagpledge.html Texas State Library and Archives Commission.]&lt;!-- &quot;indivisible&quot; reflects a historical contradiction: Texas is one of two states admitted to the union with an express provision for dividing into multiple states. California is the other. --&gt;

===R===
*My gut tells me there is something fishy going on in Texas.
**William O. Ritchie, [http://www.cnn.com/2016/02/16/politics/antonin-scalia-autopsy-death-conspiracy-theories/index.html ''Facebook'' post] (14 February 2016).

* Your whole history, from the days of [[w:Stephen_F._Austin|Austin]] and [[Sam Houston|Houston]] and [[Davy Crockett]] right to the present time, shows what splendid fighting material the average Texan makes. But I do not care how good the material, it is not going to amount to much if it is not given a chance. It is a most important thing for all of us, if we desire to keep the regular army small, that we shall have the militia, the [[w:United_States_National_Guard|National Guard]] of the several States, kept up to a proper point. Last year, I am happy to be able to say, at the maneuvers of the regulars, your Texas troops did admirably. I have been told again and again how well they did. I want to congratulate you upon the excellent law for the administration of the National Guard that has been passed by the [[w:Texas_legislature|Texas legislature]]. I feel very much at home here.
** [[Theodore Roosevelt]], [https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/address-the-texas-state-legislature-austin Address to the Texas State Legislature in Austin Online], The American Presidency Project, 6 April 1905 

===S===
*I would never go back to South Texas. They call where I grew up 'The Valley' and there's some nice scenery and stuff. But damn, there's not a lot to do.
**Megan Salinas, as quoted in [https://web.archive.org/web/20160224052941/http://archive.li/YCqhD/dda8bb0d02fe73ab2391e6a84dbe093678a01d23/scr.png &quot;Megan Salinas&quot;] (August 2013), ''HUSTLER''

*Texas was a wonderful, open-armed place for us to come. We've never regretted it for a second. I would defend Texas to the hilt everywhere. Certainly not all things about it, and I think San Antonio has some very serious problems with [[Economic growth|growth]] and &quot;[[progress]]&quot;... Texas has been a great, uplifting place to be. I think we have a wide margin on the page here, which for writers is helpful.
**[[Naomi Shihab Nye]], in ''Conversations with the World'' by Phebe Davidson (1998)

* If I owned Texas and [[Hell]], I would rent Texas and live in Hell.
** Attributed to [[Philip Sheridan]]

* Texas is a state of mind. Texas is an obsession. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. And there’s an opening convey of generalities. A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner... Sectional [[American football|football]] games have the glory and the despair of war, and when a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners.
** [[John Steinbeck]], pt. 4, ''Travels With Charley: In Search of America'' (1962).

* [[Saskatchewan]] is much like Texas; except it's more friendly to the [[United States]].
** Attributed to [[Adlai Stevenson]]. This was attributed to Stevenson without reference in 1001 Greatest Things Ever Said About Texas (2006) by Donna Ingham, p. 92. It was also attributed without reference in &quot;Reporters' Notebook&quot;, The Buffalo News, September 24, 1992. No closer connection to Stevenson has been found.

* '''All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is the place I dearly love to be. But, all my exes live in Texas.'''
**George Strait, as quoted in [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jk7uXaNuWNE &quot;All my Ex's live in Texas&quot;] (10 April 1987), written by Sanger D. Shafer and Linda J. Shafer

===T===
*We favor strengthening our common American identity and loyalty, which includes the contribution and assimilation of different racial and ethnic groups.
**[https://web.archive.org/web/20140619231738/http://www.texasgop.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/2014-Platform-Final.pdf ''Texan Republican Party Platform of 2014''] (June 2014), by the Republican Party of Texas.

*Here are four facts about cowboy hats you might not know. The first fact is, just like guns in Texas; there are more cowboy hats than there are people here. That's because most cowboy hat wearers have more than one hat and avid cowboy hat wearers have more than five. Really addicted cowboy hat wearers have more than ten hats and 20 boots. The second fact is one of the most often quoted sayings in Texas is, 'Where did you get that hat?' The second most quoted saying is, 'Don't touch my hat!'
**Ralph D. Thomas, [https://web.archive.org/web/20150216113600/http://www.indianvillagemall.com/hats/hatquestions.html &quot;Everything You Wanted To Know About Cowboy Hats But Didn't Know Who To Ask&quot;] (2015), ''Indian Village Mall''

*Cowboy and Western hats have become status symbols. Most Texans and Westerners who are fine hat wearers can spot a cheap hat a block or more away! Remember that in Texas, one of the most often quoted questions is &quot;where did you get that hat?&quot; This question could have several meanings from the person asking. It if often asked when one really admires the hat on the head of the person the question is directed too. It is sometimes used on a wanta-be cowboy who just purchased a really cheap hat which stands out like a sore thumb to those who know them. It is also sometimes asked as the asker simply doesn't like the hat but that is an individual and personal thing. Now that you too have become somewhat of an expert on cowboy hats, below is the famous Tribal And Western Impressions hat selections. We will start out with two short videos from our personal picks cowboy hats for men and our personal picks cowgirl hats for the ladies.
**Ralph D. Thomas, [https://web.archive.org/web/20150216113600/http://www.indianvillagemall.com/hats/hatquestions.html &quot;Everything You Wanted To Know About Cowboy Hats But Didn't Know Who To Ask&quot;] (2015), ''Indian Village Mall''

*The province of Texas is still part of the Mexican dominions, but it will soon contain no [[Mexicans]]; the same thing has occurred whenever the Anglo-Americans have come into contact with populations of a different origin.
**[[Alexis de Tocqueville]], ''Democracy in America'' (1835)

===W===
*A funny thing has happened to the economic miracle in Texas that [[Liberalism|liberals]] predicted would go bust along with oil prices. America's foremost state job creator of the past decade continues to produce [[opportunity]] and [[employment]]. Last week's 'beige book' release from the [[Federal Reserve System|Federal Reserve]] Bank of Dallas shows that despite the struggling oil and gas industry, the Texas economy is still enjoying moderate growth.
**''The Wall Street Journal'', [http://www.wsj.com/articles/no-economic-mess-in-texas-1437433836 &quot;No Economic Mess in Texas: Oil prices collapse but the Lone Star State keeps creating jobs&quot;] (20 July 2015)

* I'm a rolling stone from Texas&lt;br&gt;Rolling stone from the plains&lt;br&gt;I'm a rolling stone from Texas, boy&lt;br&gt;I long to be back there again
** Don Walser, &quot;Rolling Stone From Texas&quot;, ''Rolling Stone From Texas'' (1994)

* '''They say a rolling stone never gathers no moss'''&lt;br&gt;'''As long as it's rolling along'''&lt;br&gt;'''Oh, but I don't care if I've gathered any moss'''&lt;br&gt;'''If it's in my Texas home'''
** Don Walser, &quot;Rolling Stone From Texas&quot;, ''Rolling Stone From Texas'' (1994)

*Last Wednesday the citizens of this city and vicinity, native Texans, assembled in the fairgrounds to commemorate the thirtieth anniversary if the liberation of the bonded [[African American|Afro-American]] of Texas. After indulging in various pleasures, they were called to the sumptuous repasts that were spread by our energetic ladies and our worthy citizen and coadjuntor, R. B. Floyd. At 3:30 the people were called together in the amphitheater to hear the speakers of the day. The exercises were opened by the song, “Hold the Fort,” led by Presiding Elder, A. M. Ward; prayer, led by Rev. J. R. Ransom; 'John Brown's Body' was then led by Rev. Ward; E. W. Dorsey then stated why the 19th of June was celebrated. He was followed by S. O. Clayton, who in an address of twenty minutes delivered volumes of words which were impregnated with varied and bright thoughts. Closely following the speakers an animated game of base ball was witnessed; when the happy throng repaired to their homes expressing themselves highly pleased with their first Juneteenth celebration.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2014/06/22/a-juneteenth-follow-up/ ''Weekly Blade''] (22 June 1895), Parsons, Kansas

*Why should we as Texans want to be reminded of [[Confederate States of America|a legalized system of involuntary servitude, dehumanization, rape, mass murder]]?
**[[w:Royce West|Royce West]] (2011), as quoted in [http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-fix/wp/2015/06/18/the-supreme-court-just-dealt-the-confederate-flag-a-blow-heres-how/?tid=pm_politics_pop_b &quot;The Supreme Court Just Dealt the Confederate Flag a Blow, Here's How&quot;] (June 2015), ''The Washington Post''.

*As the roll call proceeded, and vote after vote was recorded in the affirmative, the spectators in the gallery broke into applause. Seventy delegates responded “aye” before there was a single negative vote. Then the name of Thomas P. Hughes of Williamson county was called. “No!” came the response. The effect was electrical. Immediately there was a demonstration of disapproval among the spectators, but order was quickly restored and the roll call proceeded. The next three votes were in the affirmative and there was applause. The secretary then called the name of William H. Johnson of Lamar county. He voted “no,” and again there was a demonstration of disapproval. Quiet was no sooner obtained, however, than the name of Joshua Johnson of Titus county was called, and he, too, voted in the negative. A roar of disapproval went up, but the chairman demanded order and the next name was called.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*The response was in the affirmative and the crowd applauded. Then there were sixty-four “ayes” in succession before another negative vote was cast. The spectators applauded popular favorites as they announced their votes. Reagan, the brilliant member of congress, was cheered. There were cheers also for Runnels, the former governor, whom Houston had defeated at the previous election. And so it went. Finally the secretary called out, “Shuford! ” This was A. P. Shuford of Wood county. He voted in the negative and there was a flutter of disapproval. Eight more affirmative votes came next, and then the secretary reached the name of James W. Throckmorton of Collin county. Throckmorton arose. “Mr. President,” he said, speaking in tones that were audible throughout the hall, “in view of the responsibility, in the presence of God and my country — and unawed by the wild spirit of revolution around me, I vote “no.” For the first time the Unionists in the audience found their voices, and there was scattered cheering. But the expressions of disapproval were more pronounced and hisses came from all parts of the gallery. Throckmorton again addressed the chair. “Mr. President,” he said, “when the rabble hiss, well may patriots tremble!” A mighty shout went up from the gallery. Only a small percentage of the crowd was Unionist in sentiment, but, small as it was, it spontaneously responded to Throckmorton’s declaration.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*Above the hoots and jeers there was prolonged cheering, and it was with extreme difficulty that President Roberts restored order. Two other delegates, L. H. Williams and George W. Wright, both of Lamar county, voted “no” before the close of the roll call. Then the result was announced and both the delegates and the spectators broke into cheers. Out of one hundred and seventy- four delegates, only seven had voted against the ordinance. An impromptu procession, which included a number of ladies, entered the hall, led by George M. Flournoy, who carried a beautiful Lone Star flag. A wild frenzy of cheering followed, and it continued for several minutes as the flag was installed in a place of honor over the platform. Texas had taken the first step toward reassuming her independent station.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*The news got abroad in the town, and everywhere there was wild enthusiasm. Only the few who disapproved the action and who felt that evil days were ahead failed to join in the rejoicing. Among the latter were the seven delegates who voted against the ordinance. It had taken a superior order of courage for them to face that unfriendly crowd and vote their convictions, for they could not fail to know that the attitude of the crowd represented the attitude of an overwhelming majority of the people of the state. They were conscious of the fact that they had participated in a historic proceeding and had made themselves conspicuous by the part they had played. They believed the time would come when their votes would be judged otherwise than they were judged by the crowd that jeered them. In order to leave a lasting record of the event, therefore, they decided to have themselves photographed in a group. This they did in due course. The photograph is reproduced in this volume (see page 342), thus being printed in a book for the first time, sixty-six years after the event it commemorates.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*&lt;p&gt;“I accept your good wishes and your resignation. And you can go to hell, Dave Hull.”&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;Dave went to Texas.&lt;/p&gt;
** [[w:Richard Wilson (author)|Richard Wilson]], ''The Girls from Planet 5'' (1955), Chapter 1

==See also==
*[[:Category:Texans|Texans]]
* [[Ivan Edwards]]

==External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Wiktionary}}
{{Wikivoyage}}
{{commons}}
*{{Official website|http://www.texasonline.com/portal/tol}}
* [https://floatiesaustin.com/ Explore Family, Group &amp; Party Boat Rentals on Lake Austin, Texas]
[[Category:Texas| ]]
[[Category:Former countries]]</text>
      <sha1>2mb1wt00g50jj31xfgzozc493s0ha62</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965177</id>
      <parentid>3965175</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:48:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>C00lnameig123</username>
        <id>3350172</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>The previous link was to a campaign by the Texas department of transportation it was not a link to their official website.</comment>
      <origin>3965177</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="59780" sha1="opjryzqds98yyn2ezivjfidgrdep691" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Flag of Texas.svg|thumb|All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is the place I dearly love to be. But, all my exes live in Texas. ~ George Strait]]
[[File:Seal of Texas.svg|thumb|Friendship! ~ ''Motto of the State of Texas'']]
'''[[w:Texas|Texas]]''', officially the '''State of Texas''', is the second largest [[w:U.S. state|state]] in the [[United States]] by both [[w:List of U.S. states and territories by area|area]] and [[w:List of U.S. states and territories by population|population]]. Geographically located in the [[w:South Central United States|south central]] part of the country, Texas shares borders with the other US states of [[Louisiana]] to the east, [[Arkansas]] to the northeast, [[Oklahoma]] to the north, [[w:New Mexico|New Mexico]] to the west, and the [[w:States of Mexico|Mexican states]] of [[w:Chihuahua (state)|Chihuahua]], [[w:Coahuila|Coahuila]], [[w:Nuevo León|Nuevo León]], and [[w:Tamaulipas|Tamaulipas]] to the southwest, while the [[w:Gulf of Mexico|Gulf of Mexico]] is to the southeast. Its state government is currently controlled by the [[Republican Party (United States)|Republican Party]], and its current governor is [[Greg Abbott]].

Texas was originally a territory of [[Mexico]] which seceded in the [[w:Texas_Revolution|Texas Revolution]] and was [[w:Texas_annexation|annexed by the United States]] at the beginning of the [[Mexican–American War]]. It also joined the [[Confederate States of America]] during the [[American Civil War]]. [[Houston]] is the [[w:List of cities in Texas by population|most populous city]] in Texas and the [[w:List of United States cities by population|fourth largest]] in the US, while [[w:San Antonio|San Antonio]] is the second most populous in the state and seventh largest in the US. [[w:Dallas–Fort Worth metroplex|Dallas–Fort Worth]] and [[w:Greater Houston|Greater Houston]] are the fourth and fifth largest [[w:List of Metropolitan Statistical Areas|metropolitan statistical areas]] in the country, respectively. Other major cities include [[w:Austin, Texas|Austin]], the second most populous [[w:List of capitals in the United States|state capital]] in the US, and [[w:El Paso, Texas|El Paso]]. Texas is nicknamed the ''Lone Star State'' to signify its former status as an independent republic, and as a reminder of the state's struggle for independence from [[Mexico]].

[[File:Texas flag map.svg|thumb|I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state! ~ ''Pledge of allegiance to the flag of the State of Texas'']]
[[File:Big Spring State Park Pavilion 2009.jpg|thumb|I can see that 'Lone Star' from a thousand miles away calling me back home though I've ventured far astray. When I see that beacon shining for me all alone, it calls me back to Texas and to home. ~ Tony Marcus]]
[[File:Cowboy Hats.jpg|thumb|Like guns in Texas; there are more cowboy hats than there are people here. That's because most cowboy hat wearers have more than one hat and avid cowboy hat wearers have more than five. Really addicted cowboy hat wearers have more than ten hats and 20 boots. ~ Ralph D. Thomas]]
[[File:MVI 2960 Campfire scene at TX Cowboy Hall of Fame.jpg|thumb|One of the most often quoted sayings in Texas is, 'Where did you get that hat?' The second most quoted saying is, 'Don't touch my hat!' ~ Ralph D. Thomas]]
[[File:CornmealProducts.jpg|thumb|Mariachi music, folklorika dancing and an ample supply of Mexican food. For a little while, it was just like being in Texas again. Growing up in Texas gave me many things I'm thankful for... In Texas, it's in the air you breathe.  ~ [[George W. Bush]]]]
[[File:Houston night life.jpg|thumb|The stars at night are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas. ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Houston_Ship_Channel.jpg|thumb|Don't try to knock us baby; don't try to hate. That's how we do it in that Lone Star state; get it straight. ~ [[w:Bun B|Bernard Freeman]]]]
[[File:Altamira Oriole icterus gularis Bentsen State Park, South Texas.jpg|thumb|The prairie sky is wide and high, deep in the heart of Texas. The sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas. ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Cityscape of McAllen, Texas.jpg|thumb|Texas; prettiest place in the world. ~ [[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]]]
[[File:Hidalgo County Courthouse.jpg|thumb|I want to wake up in Texas, I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies. ~ [[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]]]
[[File:US_Highway_83_in_McAllen,_Texas.jpg|thumb|Texas has four seasons. Drought, Flood, Blizzard and Twister. ~ Anonymous]]
[[File:United States and Texas Flags.jpg|thumb|A mighty American name? I can't think of a better name than Texas. ~ [[Laura Bush]]]]
[[File:2002 Olympic Torch Relay George W Bush.jpg|thumb|Some folks look at me and see swagger, which in [[w:Texas|Texas]] is called 'walking'. ~ [[George W. Bush]]]]
[[File:HrlVIA.jpg|thumb|When you represent Texas, always go first class. ~ [[James Michener]]]]
[[File:Texascowboys.jpg|thumb|The cowboys cry, ''{{'}}Ki-yip-pee-yi!{{'}}'', deep in the heart of Texas. The doggies bawl, and bawl and bawl, deep in the heart of Texas! ~ June Hershey]]
[[File:Amarillo Texas Downtown.jpg|thumb|When I'm so far from you, Texas? All I can do is cry. ~ Sandy Cheeks]]
[[File:Texas quarter, reverse side, 2004.png|thumb|A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner. ~ [[John Steinbeck]]]]
[[File:2007 Tech at Texas Flag.jpg|thumb|When a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners. ~ [[John Steinbeck]]]]
[[File:US Navy 100215-N-8848T-824 The first Navy Sailors to participate in the Secretary of Defense's Military Accessions Vital to National Interest pilot program.jpg|thumb|We favor strengthening our common American identity and loyalty, which includes the contribution and assimilation of different racial and ethnic groups. ~ ''Texan Republican Party Platform of 2014'']]
[[File:Copper Breaks State Park View.jpg|thumb|I'm a rolling stone from Texas&lt;br&gt;Rolling stone from the plains&lt;br&gt;I'm a rolling stone from Texas, boy&lt;br&gt;I long to be back there again ~ Don Walser]]
[[File:Daingerfield sp lake.jpg|thumb|They say a rolling stone never gathers no moss&lt;br&gt;As long as it's rolling along&lt;br&gt;Oh, but I don't care if I've gathered any moss&lt;br&gt;If it's in my Texas home ~ Don Walser]]

__NOTOC__
{{TOCalpha}}

==Quotes==
===A===
*Texas will see you in court [[Joe Biden|Mr President]].
**Abbott to DOJ suit over border [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4dj7zvFmDY]{{fix cite|date=November 2025}}
* Texas has four seasons... Drought, flood, blizzard, and twister.
** Anonymous proverb, as quoted in [http://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/texas_has_four_seasons_drought_flood_blizzard_and_twister/ ''The Big Apple'']

*Texas was a logical slave state. Her geographical latitude, her climate, her industrial opportunities aligned her among those divisions of the world who were the last to break away from an institution which had been fastened upon both barbarism and civilization from times unrecorded.
** [https://books.google.com/books?id=b1tNAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA193 ''A Twentieth Century History of Southwest Texas: Illustrated''] (1907), &quot;The Civil War Period&quot;, Volume 1, New York: The Lewis Publishing Company, p. 197

===B===
*[[Conservatism|Conservatives]] look to Texas as their bright shining light. They hold it up as a model of limited government, where low [[Taxation in the United States|taxes]] and [[business]]-friendly [[regulation]] have led to job growth and [[economic growth]] surpassing the [[Economy of the United States|national average]] over the last three decades. If the rest of the country followed the Texas model, the tale goes, our economic woes would be behind us and we would all share in a more prosperous future. The conservatives do have at least the beginnings of a case. Texas has outstripped the rest of the country in job creation. Since the [[business cycle]] peak in 1981, the number of jobs in Texas has increased by more than 78 percent. That compares with less than 52 percent for the country as a whole. The gains are not just [[oil]], although oil is a big part of the picture. If we chose the business cycle peak in 2000, when oil prices were low, as the basis of comparison, then the Texas job growth story would be less impressive. It beats national job growth by just 1.1 percent. 47.1 for Texas and 46.0 for the U.S. Hot air — or to be more generous, a warm climate — is also a big part of the story. 
**Dean Baker, [https://web.archive.org/web/20140616034836/http://america.aljazeera.com/opinions/2014/6/texas-miracle-economyjobswages.html &quot;Tall tales about Texas&quot;] (13 June 2014), ''Al-Jazeera America''

*Job growth in Texas has substantially exceeded growth in [[California]], which also has the benefit of a warm climate. This provides a clear political contrast, since California has become one of the most [[Democratic Party (United States)|Democratic]] states in the country, while Texas has become one of the most Republican. Red-state Texas easily bests blue-state California in the job growth contest since 1981, 78 to 59 percent. But the main reason for this gap is simply that the states are not playing the same game. Texas has consciously promoted development... Texas has more and cheaper [[House|housing]] than California. Just to take a couple of examples. The fair market rent for a two-bedroom apartment in [[Los Angeles|Los Angeles County]] is $1,398 a month, according to the [[w:United_States_Department_of_Housing_and_Urban_Development|Department of Housing and Urban Development]]. By contrast, in Harris County, Texas, which includes Houston, it’s just $926. The fair market rent for a two-bedroom apartment in Santa Clara County, which includes San Jose, is $1,649 a month. It was just $894 in Dallas County in 2010, the most recent year available. The gaps are even larger for home sale prices.
**Dean Baker, [https://web.archive.org/web/20140616034836/http://america.aljazeera.com/opinions/2014/6/texas-miracle-economyjobswages.html &quot;Tall tales about Texas&quot;] (13 June 2014), ''Al-Jazeera America''

*The [[Democratic Party (United States)|Democratic Party]]'s favorite hobbies are winning, [[w:Texas|Texas]] and exhaustion. 
** [[Russell Baker]], &quot;[http://select.nytimes.com/gst/abstract.html?res=F30911FA3E5F127A93C0AB1783D85F4C8685F9 Observer: The Democrats in a Nutshell]&quot;, ''The New York Times'' (22 August 1968) Baker's predictions came true with appearance of the [[w:New Covenant (politics)|New Covenant]] and the [http://www.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,20081124,00.html New New Deal]

*Having lived in Texas as a youth and been forced to study Texas history, I thought I knew the story of its admission to the Union pretty well. But I never knew the profound importance of race to that history. In particular, I did not know that [[Mexico]] had abolished [[slavery]] and that this was a key reason for the war for Texas independence. The Texans were determined to keep their slaves and were willing to fight to the death for that right. And of course, the admission of Texas as a state was critical to the maintenance of [[slavery in the United States]], which was threatened both economically and politically in the 1840s.
**[[w:Bruce Bartlett|Bruce Bartlett]], [https://books.google.com/books?id=vb3Mx7GqAmwC&amp;printsec=frontcover&amp;dq=isbn:9780230600621&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=0CB4Q6AEwAGoVChMIi92Er-SPxwIVhnQ-Ch3plQCk#v=onepage&amp;q&amp;f=false ''Wrong on Race: The Democratic Party's Buried Past''] (2008), p. x

*in 1836, when Texas won its independence from Mexico, [[Andrew Jackson|President Jackson]] stated that annexing the Republic of Texas would expand America's &quot;area of freedom&quot; and extend its &quot;circle of free institutions.&quot; However, the conception of [[freedom]] being articulated by the Anglo [[settlers]] of the Texas republic was deeply [[Racism in the United States|racialized]]: not only were most settlers originally from the [[w:Deep_South|Deep South]] but many were &quot;land speculators, slavers, militia leaders, and Indian killers.&quot;
**[[Cristina Beltrán]] ''Cruelty as Citizenship: How Migrant Suffering Sustains White Democracy'' (2020) p 66

*Everything is bigger in Texas, including economic growth. Texas was America's second fastest growing economy.
**Ananya Bhattacharya, [http://money.cnn.com/2015/06/10/news/economy/texas-big-economic-growth-2014/ &quot;Is Texas America's best state economy?&quot;] (10 June 2015), ''CNN Money''

* You don't get everything you want. A dictatorship would be a lot easier.
** [[George W. Bush]], responding to the difficulties of governing Texas, as quoted in [http://www.governing.com/archive/1998/jul/bush.txt &quot;The Taming of Texas&quot;], ''Governing Magazine'' (July 1998)

*We celebrated a little early at the White House this year, on quatro de Mayo, with a fiesta on the South Lawn. With the mariachi music, folklorika dancing and an ample supply of Mexican food. For a little while, it was just like being in Texas again. Growing up in Texas gave me many things I'm thankful for. And one of them is an appreciation of the Hispanic culture. In Texas, it's in the air you breathe; Hispanic life, Hispanic culture and Hispanic values are inseparable from the life of our state, and have been for many generations. The history of Mexican-American relations has had its troubled moments, but today our peoples enrich each other in trade and culture and family ties.
** [[George W. Bush]], [https://web.archive.org/web/20010507184032/http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2001/05/20010505-1.html radio address] (5 May 2001)

*My fellow Americans, this day has brought terrible news and great sadness to our country. At 9:00 a.m. this morning, Mission Control in [[Houston]] lost contact with our Space Shuttle ''Columbia''. A short time later, debris was seen falling from the skies above Texas. The ''Columbia'' is lost; there are no survivors.
** [[George W. Bush]], [https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Columbia_Space_Shuttle_Tragedy_Speech remarks after ''Columbia'' space shuttle disaster, televised remarks] (1 February 2003)

* Some folks look at me and see swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking'.
** [[George W. Bush]], accepting the Republican nomination for President in New York City (September 2004). Reported in [http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/13/magazine/13safire.html ''The New York Times'']

*A mighty [[United States Navy|American submarine]] deserves a mighty American name. I can't think of a better name than Texas. Skilled professionals will forge the newest alloys and technology into one of the most sophisticated [[ships]] in the world. The Texas will represent America's iron fist, which our country uses to protect our [[Citizenship|citizens]]; and to help our neighbors and allies around the world.
**[[Laura Bush]], [https://web.archive.org/web/20051029095258/http://www.nn.northropgrumman.com/news/2002/020712_ngnn_lays_keel_of_virginia_class.pdf speech at Newport News, Virginia] (12 July 2002)

===C===
*When Texas became one of the United States, she entered into an indissoluble relation. All the obligations of perpetual union, and all the guaranties of [[Republic|republican government]] in the [[Union (United States)|Union]], attached at once to the state. The Act which consummated her admission into the Union was something more than a compact; it was the incorporation of a new member into the political body. And it was final.
**[[Salmon P. Chase]], [http://blog.constitutioncenter.org/2012/11/constitution-check-can-texas-get-constitutional-permission-to-leave-the-union/ ''Texas v. White'']

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': Can't you see? It's Texas... Wish I was in Texas, prettiest place in the world... I want to wake up in Texas, I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies. Oh, why? When I'm so far from you, Texas? All I can do is cry.
:*[http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Texas_(song) &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''Patrick Star''': What's so great about dumb old Texas?
:*[http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Texas_(song) &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': Don't you dare take the name of Texas in vain! 
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''SpongeBob Squarepants''': We can't say anything bad about dumb old Texas?
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''Patrick Star''': Then, can we say people from Texas are dumb?
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''[[w:Sandy Cheeks|Sandy Cheeks]]''': No, you can't say nothing about Texas! 
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

:'''SpongeBob Squarepants''': The stars at night are dull and dim, whenever they have to be over dumb old stupid Texas!
:*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLLzoge50f0 &quot;Texas&quot;] (22 March 2000), written by Sherm Cohen and Vincent Wallace, ''SpongeBob Squarepants: Season One'', Nickelodeon&lt;!--https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok1G8ilvZn4--&gt;

* The westward tide rolled on, bearing with it new problems of adjustment. The generation of the 1840’s saw their culmination. During these years there took place the annexation of Texas, a [[Mexican–American War|war with Mexico]], the conquest of [[California]], and the settlement of the [[Oregon]] boundary with [[British Empire|Great Britain]]. Adventurous Americans in search of land and riches had been since 1820 crossing the [[w:Mexico-United_States_border|Mexican boundary]] into the Texas country, which belonged to the Republic of Mexico, freed from [[Spain]] - in 1821. While this community was growing, American sailors on the Pacific coast, captains interested in the [[China]] trade, established themselves in the ports of the Mexican Province of California. Pioneers pushed their way overland in search of skins and furs, and by 1826 reached the mission stations of the Province. The [[Mexicans]], alarmed at the appearance of these settlers, vainly sought to stem the flood; for Mexican Governments were highly unstable, and in distant Provinces their writ hardly ran. But there appeared on the scene a new military dictator, [[w:Antonio_Lopez_de_Santa_Anna|Santa Anna]], determined to strengthen Mexican authority, and at once a revolt broke out. 
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), pp. 110
* In November 1835 the Americans in Texas erected an autonomous state and raised the [[w:Lone_Star_flag|Lone Star flag]]. The Mexicans, under Santa Anna, marched northwards. At the Mission House of the Alamo in March 1836 a small body of Texans, fighting to the last man, was exterminated in one of the epic fights of [[History of the United States|American history]] by a superior Mexican force. The whole Province was aroused. Under the leadership of General [[Sam Houston]] from [[Tennessee]] a force was raised, and in savage fighting the Mexican army of Santa Anna was in its turn destroyed and its commander captured at San Jacinto River. The Texans had stormed the positions with the cry “Remember the Alamo!” The independence of Texas was recognised by Santa Anna. His act was repudiated later by the Mexican Government, but their war effort was exhausted, and the Texans organised themselves into a republic, electing Sam Houston as President.
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), pp. 110-111

* For the next ten years the question of the admission of Texas as a state of the Union was a burning issue in [[Politics of the United States|American politics]]. As each new state demanded entry into the Union so the feeling for and against [[Slavery in the United States|slavery]] ran higher. The great [[Abolitionism|Abolitionist]] journalist, [[William Lloyd Garrison]], called for a secession of the Northern states if the slave state of Texas was admitted to the Union. The Southerners, realising that Texan votes would give them a majority in the [[United States Senate|Senate]] if this vast territory was admitted as a number of separate states, clamoured for annexation. The [[Capitalism|capitalists]] of the East were committed, through the formation of land companies, to exploit Texas, and besides the issue of dubious stocks by these bodies vast quantities of paper notes and bonds of the new Texan Republic were floated in the United States. The speculation in these helped to split the political opposition of the Northern states to the annexation. Even more important was the conversion of many Northerners to belief in the “[[Manifest Destiny]]” of the United States. This meant that their destiny was ! to spread across the whole of the [[North America|North American]] continent. The Democratic Party in the election of 1844 called for the occupation of Oregon as well as the annexation of Texas, thus holding out to the North the promise of Oregon as a counterweight to Southern Texas. The victory of the Democratic candidate, [[James K. Polk]], was interpreted as a mandate for admitting Texas, and this was done by joint resolution of Congress in February 1845.
** [[Winston Churchill]], ''A History of the English-Speaking Peoples Volume IV: The Great Democracies'' (1958), p. 111

*The [[equality]] of all persons before the law is herein recognized, and shall ever remain inviolate; nor shall any citizen ever be deprived of any right, privilege, or immunity, nor be exempted from any burdens, or duty, on account of race, color, or previous condition.
**Section XXI, [https://web.archive.org/web/20160302122409/http://tarlton.law.utexas.edu/constitutions/texas1869/preamble_a1 ''Constitution of the State of Texas''] (1869)

*[T]he adoption of any system of peonage, whereby the helpless and unfortunate may be reduced to practical bondage, shall never be authorized, or tolerated by laws of the State; and neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a [[punishment]] for [[crime]], whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall ever exist in the State.
**Section XXII, [https://web.archive.org/web/20160302122409/http://tarlton.law.utexas.edu/constitutions/texas1869/preamble_a1 ''Constitution of the State of Texas''] (1869)

*Independence without slavery, would be valueless... The South without slavery would not be worth a mess of pottage.
**[[w:Caleb Cutwell|Caleb Cutwell]], letter to the ''Galvaston Tri-Weekly'' (22 February 1865)

===D===
*We hold as undeniable truths that the governments of the various States, and of the [[Confederate States of America|confederacy]] itself, were established exclusively by the white race, for themselves and their posterity; that the [[Black people|African race]] had no agency in their establishment; that they were rightfully held and regarded as an inferior and dependent race, and in that condition only could their existence in this country be rendered beneficial or tolerable.
** [https://web.archive.org/web/20081107232146/http://avalon.law.yale.edu/19th_century/csa_texsec.asp ''A Declaration of the Causes which Impel the State of Texas to Secede from the Federal Union''] (February 1861).

===E===
*General Orders, No. 3. The people are informed that, in accordance with a proclamation from the [[President of the United States|Executive of the United States]], all slaves are free. This involves an absolute [[Equal rights|equality of personal rights]] and [[Right to property|rights of property]], between former masters and slaves, and the connection heretofore existing between them, becomes that between employer and hired labor. The Freedmen are advised to remain at their present homes, and work for wages. They are informed that they will not be allowed to collect at military posts; and that they will not be supported in idleness either there or elsewhere.
**[[w:F.W. Emery|F.W. Emery]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2015/06/18/juneteenth-history-and-tradition-5/ ''General Orders, No. 3''] (19 June 1865), Galveston, Texas: Headquarters, District of Texas.
===F===
*So don't try to knock us baby, don't try to hate. That's how we do it in that Lone Star state; get it straight.
**[[w:Bun B|Bernard Freeman]], [http://genius.com/Bun-b-draped-up-h-town-mix-feat-the-h-town-all-starz-lyrics &quot;Draped Up&quot;]

===G===
*Formerly, the purchase of Texas by [[Federal government of the United States|our Government]], for the purpose of bestowing it as a gift upon [[African Americans|our colored population]], was a favorite opinion of ours; but we have settled down into the belief, that the object is neither practicable nor expedient. In the first place, it is not probable that the [[United States Congress|Congress]] would make the purchase; nor, secondly, is it likely that the mass of our colored people would remove without some compulsory process; nor, thirdly, would it be safe or convenient to organise them as a distinct nation among us,—an imperium in imperio. The fact is, it is time to repudiate all [[Colonialism|colonization]] schemes, as visionary and unprofitable; all those, we mean, which have for their design [[Racial segregation|the entire separation of the blacks from the whites]]. We must take our free colored and slave inhabitants as we find them—recognise them as countrymen who have extraordinary claims upon our charities—give them the advantages of [[education]]—respect them as members of one great family, who may be made useful in society and honorable in reputation. This is our view of the subject.
**[[William Lloyd Garrison]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2016/03/21/garrison-gives-up-on-colonization/ ''The Liberator''] (22 January 1861)

* Thermopylae had her messenger of defeat—the Alamo had none.
** [[w:Thomas Jefferson Green|Thomas Jefferson Green]], reported in ''Respectfully Quoted: A Dictionary of Quotations'' (1989). Green is said to have included the sentence in a speech he helped [[w:Edward Burleson|Edward Burleson]] prepare. While Burleson has often been credited with originating the sentence as well as using it, he lacked the classical education necessary to have made the allusion. The sentence became popular after it was engraved on the first monument to the Alamo, which is located in Austin, Texas. The 10-foot-high statue, made of stones from the Alamo, was destroyed by fire when the Capitol at Austin burned. Another monument subsequently erected on the Capitol grounds also included the sentence. J. Frank Dobie, &quot;The Alamo’s Immortalization of Words&quot;, ''Southwest Review'' (Summer 1942), p. 406–10.

*I wish for the people of Texas, as I do for the people of the entire [[Southern United States|South]], that they may go on developing their resources, and become great and powerful, and in their prosperity forget, as the worthy Mayor expressed it, that there is a boundary between the North and South. I am sure we will all be happier and much more prosperous when the day comes that there shall be no sectional feeling.
**[[Ulysses S. Grant]], as quoted in [https://books.google.com/books?id=wqJBAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA48 ''Words of Our Hero, Ulysses S. Grant''], p. 56

===H===
*The Confederate Trans-Mississippi Department did not formally surrender until June 2, 1865—''two months'' after the fall of Richmond. During that whole time, except for a few isolated areas, [[w:Texas|Texas]] was not occupied by Union troops and the whole area was in a sort of limbo, still officially in rebellion but without a clear course and without a national leadership. The {{w|U.S. Navy}} officially took possession of Texas on June 5, but did not have soldiers to establish a formal presence. General Granger arrived with troops at Galveston on June 17, and two days later issued a series of administrative notices formally notifying all of Texas that the state was now under formal [[military occupation]], who the key officers and departments were, and so on. The third of these notices was General Order No. 3, that formally announced emancipation under the terms of the [[Emancipation Proclamation]] of January 1, 1863. These notices were published in [[Newspapers|papers]] around the state, first in Galveston and then elsewhere as the news was carried inland by telegraph and railroad.
**[[w:Andy Hall|Andy Hall]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2014/06/22/a-juneteenth-follow-up/ &quot;A Juneteenth Follow-Up&quot;] (22 June 2014), ''Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog''.

*June 5, 1865. Federal forces formally took possession of Texas. Captain Benjamin F. Sands, commanding the division of the West Gulf Blockading Squadron stationed off Galveston, boarded a small Union steamer, USS ''Cornubia'', and entered Galveston harbor, followed by another gunboat, USS ''Preston''. Sands disembarked with a handful of other officers, but took no armed escort, and was met on the wharf by a Confederate officer. The officer escorted the Union men a few blocks to City Hall, where both Sands and the mayor of Galveston addressed a crowd that had gathered there. Both men made assurances of their goodwill and urged the population to go about their business peaceably. Sands told the crowd that he carried a sidearm that day not out of any fear for his own safety but as a sign of respect for the mayor and local officials. Then, along with the mayor, Sands continued on to the old U.S. Customs House, where he &quot;hoisted our flag, which now, at last, was flying over every foot of our territory, this being the closing act of the great rebellion.&quot;
**[[w:Andy Hall|Andy Hall]], [http://deadconfederates.com/2015/06/05/the-closing-act-of-the-great-rebellion/ &quot;The Closing Act of the Great Rebellion&quot;] (5 June 2015), ''Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog''.

* The [[stars]] at [[night]] are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The prairie [[sky]] is wide and high, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;Reminds me of, the one I love, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The [[Coyote|coyotes]] wail, along the trail, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;/br&gt;The [[rabbits]] rush, around the brush, deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The cowboys cry, ''{{'}}Ki-yip-pee-yi!{{'}}'', deep in the heart of Texas.&lt;br/&gt;The doggies bawl, and bawl and bawl, deep in the heart of Texas!
**June Hershey, [http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=VGF4ibgcHQE#Deep_In_The_Heart_Of_Texas______Song &quot;Deep in the Heart of Texas&quot;] (1941).

* This deadly, frigid, multibillion-dollar chaos in energy-rich Texas was not the result of a polar vortex but a small-minded vortex of [[Right-wing politics|right-wing]] political hokum that puts the interests of a few corporate profiteers over the well-being of the people...  Responding to withering public criticism of the state's chaotic and disastrous response to a killer winter storm, [[Greg Abbott|Abbott]] fumed, &quot;What happened this week to our fellow Texans is absolutely unacceptable.&quot;... Abbott pointed his outrage at ERCOT, the Electric Reliability Council of Texas, the agency charged with maintaining a reliable flow of electricity to Texas homes, schools, businesses, etc.  But... ERCOT merely administers policies set by the Public Utility Commission, and that corporate-cozy body has failed for years to mandate that the state's privatized, for-profit electric utilities weatherize their power generators to prevent freeze-ups. And who appointed the three members of that commission? Why, Greg, it was you! In fact, the chairwoman and one of the two other members of PUC are former top staffers of the governor.
**[[Jim Hightower|Jim Hightower,]] What the Texas Deep Freeze Revealed About Corporate-Run Government, ''Common Dreams'' (24 February 2021)

* The word ''Texas'' is from a native word—or, a [[w:Caddo language|Caddo]] word—meaning &quot;friendly&quot;. So, that means early Texas settlers were like, &quot;Oh! &quot;Friendly&quot;. That's a great one! I'm 'onna call this land Friendly. I like that word. Now, you gotta go! [[wikt:git#Etymology 2|Git]]! It's my land now. Git! Git!
** Laura Horse. ''First Nations Comedy Experience'', episode 1 (9 March 2018)

* Texas will again lift its head and stand among the nations. it ought to do so, for no country upon the globe can compare with it in natural advantages.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* All new states are invested, more or less, by a class of noisy, second-rate men who are always in favor of rash and extreme measures, but Texas was absolutely overrun by such men.
** [[Sam Houston]], first President of the Republic of Texas. As quoted in the [http://www.shsu.edu/~smm_www/History/quotes.shtml Sam Houston Memorial Museum].

* Texas is lost.
**[[Sam Houston]], as quoted in [http://grandoldpartisan.typepad.com/blog/2016/03/sam-houston.html &quot;Revering Sam Houston, anti-Confederate patriot&quot;] (18 March 2016), by Michael Zak, ''Grand Old Partisan''

* One objection I have heard voiced to works of this kind&amp;mdash;dealing with Texas&amp;mdash;is the amount of gore spilled across the pages. It can not be otherwise. In order to write a realistic and true history of any part of the Southwest, one must narrate such things, even at the risk of monotony.
** [[Robert E. Howard]] in a letter to {{w|August Derleth}} (March 1933).

===J===

* If you haven't climbed up to Enchanted Rock,&lt;br&gt;Drank a cold Shiner down in Luckenbach,&lt;br&gt;Taken your baby to the River Walk,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* If you never caught a trout down in Port A,&lt;br&gt;Heard the words to Corpus Christi Bay,&lt;br&gt;Never seen fireworks on PK,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* Havent had a kolache when you go through West,&lt;br&gt;Never heard of the Larry Jo Taylor fest,&lt;br&gt;Think polished pop country crap sounds the best,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

* You say you haven't hiked through Big Bend,&lt;br&gt;Had your hair blown back by a Lubbock wind,&lt;br&gt;Been somewhere where they call you &quot;friend&quot;,&lt;br&gt;Then you ain't met My Texas yet.
** Josh Abbott Band, &quot;My Texas,&quot; ''Small Town Family Dream'' (2012), feat. Pat Green

===K===

*Texas is about as far from a Green New Deal as you can possibly get, seeing as a [[Green New Deal]] is a plan to bring together the need to get off [[Fossil fuel|fossil fuels]] in the next decade to radically decarbonize our energy system,.. to marry that huge infrastructure investment in the next green economy with a plan to battle [[poverty]], to create huge numbers of good, union, green jobs, to take care of people. It’s a plan to have [[w:Universal_healthcare|universal public healthcare]] and child care and a jobs guarantee. So it’s all the things that are not happening in Texas, because there isn’t just this extreme weather, which many [[scientists]] believe is linked to [[Earth|our warming planet]] — you know, you can’t link one storm with [[climate change]], but the patterns are very clear, and this should be a wake-up call — but Texas is also suffering a pandemic of [[Poverty in the United States|poverty]], of exclusion, of [[Racism in the United States|racial injustice]]...  we’ve heard this messaging, I think, because of panic, frankly, because the Green New Deal is a plan that could solve so many of Texas’s problems and the problems across the country, and [[Republican Party (United States)|Republicans]] have absolutely nothing to offer except for more [[w:Deregulation|deregulation]], more [[privatization]], more [[austerity]]. And so they have been frantically seeking to deflect from the real causes of this crisis, which is an intersection of extreme weather, of the kind that we are seeing more of because of climate change, intersecting with a deregulated, fossil fuel-based energy system.
**[[Naomi Klein]], [https://www.democracynow.org/2021/2/22/naomi_klein_texas_green_new_deal Fossil Fuel Shock Doctrine: Naomi Klein on Deadly Deregulation &amp; Why Texas Needs the Green New Deal,] ''Democracy Now!'' (22 February 2021)

*One in four Texans lacks health insurance, the highest proportion in the nation.
** Paul Krugman, [http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2011/aug/15/paul-krugman/one-four-texans-lack-health-insurance/ ''The New York Times''] (15 August 2011).

===M===
*'''I can see that lone star from a thousand miles away calling me back home though I've ventured far astray. When I see that beacon shining for me all alone, it calls me back to Texas and to home.'''
**Tony Marcus, [http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Lone_Star_(song) &quot;Lone Star&quot;] (1998), ''Swingin' Out West''

* The pattern of abuses in [[w:Uvalde_County,_Texas|Uvalde County]] is strikingly reminiscent of the Deep South of the early 1960s. The Civil Rights Commission's study documents that duly registered [[Mexican Americans|Chicano]] voters are not being placed on the voting lists; that election judges are selectively and deliberately invalidating ballots cast by minority voters; that election judges are refusing to aid minority voters who are illiterate in [[English language|English]]; that the tax assessor-collector of Uvalde County, who is responsible for registering voters, refuses to name members of minority groups as deputy registrars; that the Uvalde County tax assessor repeatedly runs out of registration application cards when minority voter applicants ask for them; that the Uvalde County tax assessor-collector refuses to register voter applicants based on the technicality that the application was filed on a printed card bearing a previous year's date. Other abuses were uncovered by the study of the Civil Rights Commission in Uvalde County, and elsewhere in Texas: Widespread [[w:Gerrymandering|gerrymandering]] with the purpose of diluting minority voting strength; systematic drawing of at-large electoral districts with this same purpose and design; maintenance of polling places exclusively in areas inaccessible to minority voters; excessive firing fees to run for political office
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

* In Texas, as many of you know, children were required to be educated in either the white or the colored school. Officials in Texas, and I have in mind Pecos County and Nueces County, which have large percentages of [[Mexican Americans|Mexican American]] people, could not decide whether Mexican Americans were white or colored, so we got no schools. In most other schools, as in Uvalde, we were in fact put into a third category of school, called the Mexican school.
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

* In order to prevail in Texas, we have to argue what is now known as the northern de jure [[Racial segregation|segregation]] cases. We culled through the school board minutes going back to 1919. We traced the development of their school construction policies, their school assignment policies. We noticed that even toys were provided on the basis of [[race]]; twice the amount was spent for children in the Anglo schools as for children in the Mexican school, even though there were double the number of children in the Mexican schools as in the Anglo schools.
** [[Vilma Socorro Martínez]], speaking to Congress in 1975, included in ''Voices of Multicultural America: Notable Speeches Delivered by African, Asian, Hispanic and Native Americans, 1790-1995'' edited by Deborah Gillan Straub (1995)

*The crisis stemmed from a unique confluence of weaknesses in the state’s power system.  Texas is the only state in the continental United States with an independent and isolated grid. That allows the state to avoid federal regulation - but also severely limits its ability to draw emergency power from other grids. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electric%20Reliability%20Council%20of%20Texas ERCOT] also operates the only major U.S. grid that does not have a capacity market - a system that provides payments to operators to be on standby to supply power during severe weather events. This week’s cold snap left 4.5 million... without power. More than 14.5 million Texans endured a related water-supply crisis as pipes froze and burst. About 65,000 customers remained without power as of Saturday afternoon, even as temperatures started to rise, according to website PowerOutage.US.   State health officials have linked more than two dozen deaths to the power crisis. Some died from hypothermia or possible carbon monoxide poisoning caused by portable generators running in basements and garages without enough ventilation. Officials say they suspect the death count will rise as more bodies are discovered.
** [https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-weather-texas-power-insight-idUSKBN2AL00N Tim McLaughlin, Stephanie Kelly,  Why a predictable cold snap crippled the Texas power grid], ''Reuters News Service'', (20 February 2021)
 
*Don't mess with Texas!
** Tim McClure, [https://www.txdot.gov/ Texas Department of Transportation] (1985).

* When MacNab blanched, no more stunned than I, Rusk rose and put his arm about his shoulders: &quot;'''Never forget, son, when you represent Texas, always go first class.'''&quot;
** [[James Michener]], ''Texas'' (1985), Closing line

* Whether they are sitting in the plush Driskill Hotel in Austin or some god-awful motel in Waco, Texans firmly maintain that they have the biggest-and-best-of-everything. This bragging does not always make other people love Texas, even in the West. (When, back in the early 1980s, one of us broke down in a car with Texas plates in southern [[Colorado]], nobody stopped to help for what seemed like an eternity; the man who eventually did explained: &quot;You should have had a sign saying you weren't from Texas.&quot;)
** [[John Micklethwait]] and [[Adrian Wooldridge]], &quot;For Texas, Business and God&quot; (2004), ''[[The Right Nation]]'', {{ISBN|1-59420-020-3}}.

*Welcome to the 2-1-4. Big be, D Texas. Let Mr. Sexes flex this Lexus and this where the Cowboys play; they battle with my team from the bay. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frisco,%20Texas Frisco], now I'm from the Northwest. But, I likes my soul food, so I'm calling up an old groove and I'm a brother with a gut and don't forget about [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San%20Antonio San Anton]'. The last time I went through, I took three broads home and much love love to the brothers in [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Austin,%20Texas Austin] and the 5-1-2. I'm flossing in Lawston; a state that's as big as hell.
**[[Sir Mix-a-Lot]], [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gI9I7GXdA4&amp;feature=youtu.be &quot;Jump on It&quot;] (1996), ''Return of the Bumpasaurus'', Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Regent Music Corporation

* [[Friendship]].
** Motto of the State of Texas.

===P===
*Texans would be without [[electricity]] for longer than three days to keep the [[Federal government of the United States|federal government]] out of their [[business]].
**[[Rick Perry]], quoted in [https://www.democracynow.org/2021/2/22/naomi_klein_texas_green_new_deal Fossil Fuel Shock Doctrine: Naomi Klein on Deadly Deregulation &amp; Why Texas Needs the Green New Deal,] ''Democracy Now!'' (22 February 2021)

* Honor the Texas flag; I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state under God, one and indivisible.
** [[w:Flag of Texas# Pledge of allegiance|Pledge of allegiance to the state flag]] as amended in 2007. Chapter 3100, Sections 3100.101–3100.104 of the Texas Government Code, as reported by [http://www.tsl.state.tx.us/ref/abouttx/flagpledge.html Texas State Library and Archives Commission.]&lt;!-- &quot;indivisible&quot; reflects a historical contradiction: Texas is one of two states admitted to the union with an express provision for dividing into multiple states. California is the other. --&gt;

===R===
*My gut tells me there is something fishy going on in Texas.
**William O. Ritchie, [http://www.cnn.com/2016/02/16/politics/antonin-scalia-autopsy-death-conspiracy-theories/index.html ''Facebook'' post] (14 February 2016).

* Your whole history, from the days of [[w:Stephen_F._Austin|Austin]] and [[Sam Houston|Houston]] and [[Davy Crockett]] right to the present time, shows what splendid fighting material the average Texan makes. But I do not care how good the material, it is not going to amount to much if it is not given a chance. It is a most important thing for all of us, if we desire to keep the regular army small, that we shall have the militia, the [[w:United_States_National_Guard|National Guard]] of the several States, kept up to a proper point. Last year, I am happy to be able to say, at the maneuvers of the regulars, your Texas troops did admirably. I have been told again and again how well they did. I want to congratulate you upon the excellent law for the administration of the National Guard that has been passed by the [[w:Texas_legislature|Texas legislature]]. I feel very much at home here.
** [[Theodore Roosevelt]], [https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/address-the-texas-state-legislature-austin Address to the Texas State Legislature in Austin Online], The American Presidency Project, 6 April 1905 

===S===
*I would never go back to South Texas. They call where I grew up 'The Valley' and there's some nice scenery and stuff. But damn, there's not a lot to do.
**Megan Salinas, as quoted in [https://web.archive.org/web/20160224052941/http://archive.li/YCqhD/dda8bb0d02fe73ab2391e6a84dbe093678a01d23/scr.png &quot;Megan Salinas&quot;] (August 2013), ''HUSTLER''

*Texas was a wonderful, open-armed place for us to come. We've never regretted it for a second. I would defend Texas to the hilt everywhere. Certainly not all things about it, and I think San Antonio has some very serious problems with [[Economic growth|growth]] and &quot;[[progress]]&quot;... Texas has been a great, uplifting place to be. I think we have a wide margin on the page here, which for writers is helpful.
**[[Naomi Shihab Nye]], in ''Conversations with the World'' by Phebe Davidson (1998)

* If I owned Texas and [[Hell]], I would rent Texas and live in Hell.
** Attributed to [[Philip Sheridan]]

* Texas is a state of mind. Texas is an obsession. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. And there’s an opening convey of generalities. A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner... Sectional [[American football|football]] games have the glory and the despair of war, and when a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners.
** [[John Steinbeck]], pt. 4, ''Travels With Charley: In Search of America'' (1962).

* [[Saskatchewan]] is much like Texas; except it's more friendly to the [[United States]].
** Attributed to [[Adlai Stevenson]]. This was attributed to Stevenson without reference in 1001 Greatest Things Ever Said About Texas (2006) by Donna Ingham, p. 92. It was also attributed without reference in &quot;Reporters' Notebook&quot;, The Buffalo News, September 24, 1992. No closer connection to Stevenson has been found.

* '''All my exes live in Texas, and Texas is the place I dearly love to be. But, all my exes live in Texas.'''
**George Strait, as quoted in [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jk7uXaNuWNE &quot;All my Ex's live in Texas&quot;] (10 April 1987), written by Sanger D. Shafer and Linda J. Shafer

===T===
*We favor strengthening our common American identity and loyalty, which includes the contribution and assimilation of different racial and ethnic groups.
**[https://web.archive.org/web/20140619231738/http://www.texasgop.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/2014-Platform-Final.pdf ''Texan Republican Party Platform of 2014''] (June 2014), by the Republican Party of Texas.

*Here are four facts about cowboy hats you might not know. The first fact is, just like guns in Texas; there are more cowboy hats than there are people here. That's because most cowboy hat wearers have more than one hat and avid cowboy hat wearers have more than five. Really addicted cowboy hat wearers have more than ten hats and 20 boots. The second fact is one of the most often quoted sayings in Texas is, 'Where did you get that hat?' The second most quoted saying is, 'Don't touch my hat!'
**Ralph D. Thomas, [https://web.archive.org/web/20150216113600/http://www.indianvillagemall.com/hats/hatquestions.html &quot;Everything You Wanted To Know About Cowboy Hats But Didn't Know Who To Ask&quot;] (2015), ''Indian Village Mall''

*Cowboy and Western hats have become status symbols. Most Texans and Westerners who are fine hat wearers can spot a cheap hat a block or more away! Remember that in Texas, one of the most often quoted questions is &quot;where did you get that hat?&quot; This question could have several meanings from the person asking. It if often asked when one really admires the hat on the head of the person the question is directed too. It is sometimes used on a wanta-be cowboy who just purchased a really cheap hat which stands out like a sore thumb to those who know them. It is also sometimes asked as the asker simply doesn't like the hat but that is an individual and personal thing. Now that you too have become somewhat of an expert on cowboy hats, below is the famous Tribal And Western Impressions hat selections. We will start out with two short videos from our personal picks cowboy hats for men and our personal picks cowgirl hats for the ladies.
**Ralph D. Thomas, [https://web.archive.org/web/20150216113600/http://www.indianvillagemall.com/hats/hatquestions.html &quot;Everything You Wanted To Know About Cowboy Hats But Didn't Know Who To Ask&quot;] (2015), ''Indian Village Mall''

*The province of Texas is still part of the Mexican dominions, but it will soon contain no [[Mexicans]]; the same thing has occurred whenever the Anglo-Americans have come into contact with populations of a different origin.
**[[Alexis de Tocqueville]], ''Democracy in America'' (1835)

===W===
*A funny thing has happened to the economic miracle in Texas that [[Liberalism|liberals]] predicted would go bust along with oil prices. America's foremost state job creator of the past decade continues to produce [[opportunity]] and [[employment]]. Last week's 'beige book' release from the [[Federal Reserve System|Federal Reserve]] Bank of Dallas shows that despite the struggling oil and gas industry, the Texas economy is still enjoying moderate growth.
**''The Wall Street Journal'', [http://www.wsj.com/articles/no-economic-mess-in-texas-1437433836 &quot;No Economic Mess in Texas: Oil prices collapse but the Lone Star State keeps creating jobs&quot;] (20 July 2015)

* I'm a rolling stone from Texas&lt;br&gt;Rolling stone from the plains&lt;br&gt;I'm a rolling stone from Texas, boy&lt;br&gt;I long to be back there again
** Don Walser, &quot;Rolling Stone From Texas&quot;, ''Rolling Stone From Texas'' (1994)

* '''They say a rolling stone never gathers no moss'''&lt;br&gt;'''As long as it's rolling along'''&lt;br&gt;'''Oh, but I don't care if I've gathered any moss'''&lt;br&gt;'''If it's in my Texas home'''
** Don Walser, &quot;Rolling Stone From Texas&quot;, ''Rolling Stone From Texas'' (1994)

*Last Wednesday the citizens of this city and vicinity, native Texans, assembled in the fairgrounds to commemorate the thirtieth anniversary if the liberation of the bonded [[African American|Afro-American]] of Texas. After indulging in various pleasures, they were called to the sumptuous repasts that were spread by our energetic ladies and our worthy citizen and coadjuntor, R. B. Floyd. At 3:30 the people were called together in the amphitheater to hear the speakers of the day. The exercises were opened by the song, “Hold the Fort,” led by Presiding Elder, A. M. Ward; prayer, led by Rev. J. R. Ransom; 'John Brown's Body' was then led by Rev. Ward; E. W. Dorsey then stated why the 19th of June was celebrated. He was followed by S. O. Clayton, who in an address of twenty minutes delivered volumes of words which were impregnated with varied and bright thoughts. Closely following the speakers an animated game of base ball was witnessed; when the happy throng repaired to their homes expressing themselves highly pleased with their first Juneteenth celebration.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2014/06/22/a-juneteenth-follow-up/ ''Weekly Blade''] (22 June 1895), Parsons, Kansas

*Why should we as Texans want to be reminded of [[Confederate States of America|a legalized system of involuntary servitude, dehumanization, rape, mass murder]]?
**[[w:Royce West|Royce West]] (2011), as quoted in [http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-fix/wp/2015/06/18/the-supreme-court-just-dealt-the-confederate-flag-a-blow-heres-how/?tid=pm_politics_pop_b &quot;The Supreme Court Just Dealt the Confederate Flag a Blow, Here's How&quot;] (June 2015), ''The Washington Post''.

*As the roll call proceeded, and vote after vote was recorded in the affirmative, the spectators in the gallery broke into applause. Seventy delegates responded “aye” before there was a single negative vote. Then the name of Thomas P. Hughes of Williamson county was called. “No!” came the response. The effect was electrical. Immediately there was a demonstration of disapproval among the spectators, but order was quickly restored and the roll call proceeded. The next three votes were in the affirmative and there was applause. The secretary then called the name of William H. Johnson of Lamar county. He voted “no,” and again there was a demonstration of disapproval. Quiet was no sooner obtained, however, than the name of Joshua Johnson of Titus county was called, and he, too, voted in the negative. A roar of disapproval went up, but the chairman demanded order and the next name was called.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*The response was in the affirmative and the crowd applauded. Then there were sixty-four “ayes” in succession before another negative vote was cast. The spectators applauded popular favorites as they announced their votes. Reagan, the brilliant member of congress, was cheered. There were cheers also for Runnels, the former governor, whom Houston had defeated at the previous election. And so it went. Finally the secretary called out, “Shuford! ” This was A. P. Shuford of Wood county. He voted in the negative and there was a flutter of disapproval. Eight more affirmative votes came next, and then the secretary reached the name of James W. Throckmorton of Collin county. Throckmorton arose. “Mr. President,” he said, speaking in tones that were audible throughout the hall, “in view of the responsibility, in the presence of God and my country — and unawed by the wild spirit of revolution around me, I vote “no.” For the first time the Unionists in the audience found their voices, and there was scattered cheering. But the expressions of disapproval were more pronounced and hisses came from all parts of the gallery. Throckmorton again addressed the chair. “Mr. President,” he said, “when the rabble hiss, well may patriots tremble!” A mighty shout went up from the gallery. Only a small percentage of the crowd was Unionist in sentiment, but, small as it was, it spontaneously responded to Throckmorton’s declaration.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*Above the hoots and jeers there was prolonged cheering, and it was with extreme difficulty that President Roberts restored order. Two other delegates, L. H. Williams and George W. Wright, both of Lamar county, voted “no” before the close of the roll call. Then the result was announced and both the delegates and the spectators broke into cheers. Out of one hundred and seventy- four delegates, only seven had voted against the ordinance. An impromptu procession, which included a number of ladies, entered the hall, led by George M. Flournoy, who carried a beautiful Lone Star flag. A wild frenzy of cheering followed, and it continued for several minutes as the flag was installed in a place of honor over the platform. Texas had taken the first step toward reassuming her independent station.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*The news got abroad in the town, and everywhere there was wild enthusiasm. Only the few who disapproved the action and who felt that evil days were ahead failed to join in the rejoicing. Among the latter were the seven delegates who voted against the ordinance. It had taken a superior order of courage for them to face that unfriendly crowd and vote their convictions, for they could not fail to know that the attitude of the crowd represented the attitude of an overwhelming majority of the people of the state. They were conscious of the fact that they had participated in a historic proceeding and had made themselves conspicuous by the part they had played. They believed the time would come when their votes would be judged otherwise than they were judged by the crowd that jeered them. In order to leave a lasting record of the event, therefore, they decided to have themselves photographed in a group. This they did in due course. The photograph is reproduced in this volume (see page 342), thus being printed in a book for the first time, sixty-six years after the event it commemorates.
**[http://deadconfederates.com/2013/08/20/against-secession/ Wharton's ''History of Texas, from Wilderness to Commonwealth''], Vol. 4, pp. 336&amp;ndash;38.

*&lt;p&gt;“I accept your good wishes and your resignation. And you can go to hell, Dave Hull.”&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;Dave went to Texas.&lt;/p&gt;
** [[w:Richard Wilson (author)|Richard Wilson]], ''The Girls from Planet 5'' (1955), Chapter 1

==See also==
*[[:Category:Texans|Texans]]
* [[Ivan Edwards]]

==External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Wiktionary}}
{{Wikivoyage}}
{{commons}}
*{{Official website|http://www.texasonline.com/portal/tol}}
* [https://floatiesaustin.com/ Explore Family, Group &amp; Party Boat Rentals on Lake Austin, Texas]
[[Category:Texas| ]]
[[Category:Former countries]]</text>
      <sha1>opjryzqds98yyn2ezivjfidgrdep691</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wikiquote:Administrators' noticeboard</title>
    <ns>4</ns>
    <id>114956</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965202</id>
      <parentid>3963109</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:50:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Renaming */ new section</comment>
      <origin>3965202</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8945" sha1="o7a2t0hmtkxn7tysaax8iqyjvzawtxn" xml:space="preserve">{{/Header}}
{{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Administrators' noticeboard/Archive/%(counter)03d
|algo = old(15d)
|counter = 43
|maxarchivesize = 100K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}

== @Baratiiman and [[2026 Iran war]]. ==

&lt;div class=&quot;cd-moveMark&quot;&gt;''Moved from [[Wikiquote:Village pump#@Baratiiman and 2026 Iran war.]].  [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 22:07, 26 June 2026 (UTC)''&lt;/div&gt;

@[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] is posting a lot of material on [[2026 Iran war]]. Although he has been a member since 2013 he seems incapable of following basic conventions like ordering by date, basic formatting and providing citiations. Many of his posts have been translated into English from Farsi even some of the English stuff looks like it has been double translated so it doesn't matched the sourced articles. He's flooding the [[2026 Iran war]] page with multiple entries per day and some of them have nothing to do with this topic. (just because Donald Trump says something doesn't mean it's about the Iran War). I have been cleaning up this page almost every day and it's still a mess, but with the frequency of changes, poor formattinng etc. it's simpler for me to just abandon it, which is a shame as it feels like an important subject. I noticed he (gender assumed) has been blocked indefinitely by several other projects, including in his own language. Some of his content is OK, nearly everything needs work though to bring into something half presentable. Perhaps there is some option to block or topic ban this account? [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:52, 26 June 2026 (UTC)

:{{Ping|Baratiiman}} Please reply to this and can you tell us if you're an English speaker? ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 00:24, 27 June 2026 (UTC)
::i'm iranian i didn't think dates simply would be getting me permabanned and he has no problem with my &quot;posts&quot; he is himself &quot;posting&quot; PRO Iran regime propaganda i have not touched, now i quote Xi Jin PIng and he comes to you here to get me banned ... all my edits have valid sources, and if they are FARSI , well FARSI is still a language that can be translated  BEFORE I CAME HERE THIS PAGE WAS EMPTY FOR 120 DAYS OF 2026 INTERNET BLACKOUT IN IRAN

You guys are saying THIS QUOTES IS NOT RELATED TO IRAN WAR|
*Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/trump-says-iran-has-told-us-no-tolls-being-sought-strait-hormuz-2026-06-24/ ]
OR THIS ONE 

*I don't think it was us Nobody Did It on Purpose It’s horrible what happened, but there were missiles flying all over the place, and somebody said it was our missile, well, maybe it wasn’t our missile. But I’ve seen nothing to lead me to believe it was
**[https://www.jamaicaobserver.com/2026/06/24/trump-casts-doubt-us-involvement-deadly-iranian-school-strike/ ]

**Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP

*''We have given our own 20 million oil barrels to IRGC-AF aerospace force to spend to be able to fight otherwise they couldn't, security council is the only place where decision of unity was made , chief of headquarters was there , army and IRGC heads commanders were there , chief of security was there, they all said same thing , we all accepted this path we are going to go, no joke , everyone agreed now we sat and thought this'' 
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606218789 Dr Pezeshkian]

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits,we defeated them totally militarily,[Iran Deal] 
probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump]

I defy you to tell me exactly what is wrong with these
[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] ([[User talk:Baratiiman|talk]]) 18:20, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

:Quotes need to be a) relevant, b) dated, c) attributed to a named source (ideally in English), d) added in the chronological order, e) formatted correctly with * and **. There's literally hundreds of examples to look at on this page alone to see how the formatting should be! It doesn't matter if it is an Iranian person, American person, etc. There is no agenda, other than to provide a list of quotes which tell a story. The main thing is someone can read from top to bottom and read the narrative as it happens. Most of your quotes are ok, albeit always badly formatted, or not quite the source text. A few are irrelevant and should be placed on another page (e.g. your last one &quot;Over half of Democrats say they want to live in another country. Go. We can’t deport that many&quot;), the Xi one (about Trump moving fast). The main issue is you dump all your quotes out of sequence at the top of the month, or the bottom of the month. I have to go through every one, fix the markup, then find the publication date (I have to use AI to translate the Farsi to even see the date) so that everything is roughly in the order it was published.
:So basically I either have to edit every post you put on, or just abandon the page and leave it to you. Nobody else will be able to edit or read it as it will end up completely unreadable with everything out of sequence and the formatting all over the place. If you were to put it on correctly in the first place I'd just skip over the irrelevant quotes, I have better things to do with my time than make editorial decisions about every quote you provide, so I would overlook the odd stray quote if everything else was ok. But as I have been wanting to add my own quotes I've had to correct what was there and literally move and format every single quote you have put on, just to clear the ground for some more. [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 19:12, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

== Repeat vandalism on The Mummy Returns ==

The same vandal that has repeatedly visited ''[[The Mummy Returns]]'' on Wikiquote, to make the same massive cut to the page's content, to leave the same captioned image, is back again, now the most active they've been since 2022. They are now using throwaway accounts, however, and not editing from an IP address like they were doing before.

I would like to ask that ''The Mummy Returns'' be placed under protected status again. Documentation of the incidents of vandalism and all usernames/IP addresses observed is available on the movie's discussion page. As far as I can tell, the same vandal has been at this since 2016, a full 10 years. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:00, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Protected}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 16:24, 6 July 2026 (UTC)
::That should do it. Thank you for your help. It's appreciated. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:34, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

== Renaming  ==

I mistakenly created a wikiqoute page under the wrong person name. The content of the page is about another  person, I would appreciate your help in remaining the page title from Julia Nicol to Toyin Ajao. [[User:UniqueMonik|UniqueMonik]] ([[User talk:UniqueMonik|talk]]) 06:50, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>o7a2t0hmtkxn7tysaax8iqyjvzawtxn</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965204</id>
      <parentid>3965202</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:52:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Renaming */</comment>
      <origin>3965204</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8959" sha1="apn014qgvydl4z1k9psjpqp2ybm8gdn" xml:space="preserve">{{/Header}}
{{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Administrators' noticeboard/Archive/%(counter)03d
|algo = old(15d)
|counter = 43
|maxarchivesize = 100K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}

== @Baratiiman and [[2026 Iran war]]. ==

&lt;div class=&quot;cd-moveMark&quot;&gt;''Moved from [[Wikiquote:Village pump#@Baratiiman and 2026 Iran war.]].  [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 22:07, 26 June 2026 (UTC)''&lt;/div&gt;

@[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] is posting a lot of material on [[2026 Iran war]]. Although he has been a member since 2013 he seems incapable of following basic conventions like ordering by date, basic formatting and providing citiations. Many of his posts have been translated into English from Farsi even some of the English stuff looks like it has been double translated so it doesn't matched the sourced articles. He's flooding the [[2026 Iran war]] page with multiple entries per day and some of them have nothing to do with this topic. (just because Donald Trump says something doesn't mean it's about the Iran War). I have been cleaning up this page almost every day and it's still a mess, but with the frequency of changes, poor formattinng etc. it's simpler for me to just abandon it, which is a shame as it feels like an important subject. I noticed he (gender assumed) has been blocked indefinitely by several other projects, including in his own language. Some of his content is OK, nearly everything needs work though to bring into something half presentable. Perhaps there is some option to block or topic ban this account? [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:52, 26 June 2026 (UTC)

:{{Ping|Baratiiman}} Please reply to this and can you tell us if you're an English speaker? ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 00:24, 27 June 2026 (UTC)
::i'm iranian i didn't think dates simply would be getting me permabanned and he has no problem with my &quot;posts&quot; he is himself &quot;posting&quot; PRO Iran regime propaganda i have not touched, now i quote Xi Jin PIng and he comes to you here to get me banned ... all my edits have valid sources, and if they are FARSI , well FARSI is still a language that can be translated  BEFORE I CAME HERE THIS PAGE WAS EMPTY FOR 120 DAYS OF 2026 INTERNET BLACKOUT IN IRAN

You guys are saying THIS QUOTES IS NOT RELATED TO IRAN WAR|
*Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/trump-says-iran-has-told-us-no-tolls-being-sought-strait-hormuz-2026-06-24/ ]
OR THIS ONE 

*I don't think it was us Nobody Did It on Purpose It’s horrible what happened, but there were missiles flying all over the place, and somebody said it was our missile, well, maybe it wasn’t our missile. But I’ve seen nothing to lead me to believe it was
**[https://www.jamaicaobserver.com/2026/06/24/trump-casts-doubt-us-involvement-deadly-iranian-school-strike/ ]

**Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP

*''We have given our own 20 million oil barrels to IRGC-AF aerospace force to spend to be able to fight otherwise they couldn't, security council is the only place where decision of unity was made , chief of headquarters was there , army and IRGC heads commanders were there , chief of security was there, they all said same thing , we all accepted this path we are going to go, no joke , everyone agreed now we sat and thought this'' 
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606218789 Dr Pezeshkian]

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits,we defeated them totally militarily,[Iran Deal] 
probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump]

I defy you to tell me exactly what is wrong with these
[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] ([[User talk:Baratiiman|talk]]) 18:20, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

:Quotes need to be a) relevant, b) dated, c) attributed to a named source (ideally in English), d) added in the chronological order, e) formatted correctly with * and **. There's literally hundreds of examples to look at on this page alone to see how the formatting should be! It doesn't matter if it is an Iranian person, American person, etc. There is no agenda, other than to provide a list of quotes which tell a story. The main thing is someone can read from top to bottom and read the narrative as it happens. Most of your quotes are ok, albeit always badly formatted, or not quite the source text. A few are irrelevant and should be placed on another page (e.g. your last one &quot;Over half of Democrats say they want to live in another country. Go. We can’t deport that many&quot;), the Xi one (about Trump moving fast). The main issue is you dump all your quotes out of sequence at the top of the month, or the bottom of the month. I have to go through every one, fix the markup, then find the publication date (I have to use AI to translate the Farsi to even see the date) so that everything is roughly in the order it was published.
:So basically I either have to edit every post you put on, or just abandon the page and leave it to you. Nobody else will be able to edit or read it as it will end up completely unreadable with everything out of sequence and the formatting all over the place. If you were to put it on correctly in the first place I'd just skip over the irrelevant quotes, I have better things to do with my time than make editorial decisions about every quote you provide, so I would overlook the odd stray quote if everything else was ok. But as I have been wanting to add my own quotes I've had to correct what was there and literally move and format every single quote you have put on, just to clear the ground for some more. [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 19:12, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

== Repeat vandalism on The Mummy Returns ==

The same vandal that has repeatedly visited ''[[The Mummy Returns]]'' on Wikiquote, to make the same massive cut to the page's content, to leave the same captioned image, is back again, now the most active they've been since 2022. They are now using throwaway accounts, however, and not editing from an IP address like they were doing before.

I would like to ask that ''The Mummy Returns'' be placed under protected status again. Documentation of the incidents of vandalism and all usernames/IP addresses observed is available on the movie's discussion page. As far as I can tell, the same vandal has been at this since 2016, a full 10 years. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:00, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Protected}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 16:24, 6 July 2026 (UTC)
::That should do it. Thank you for your help. It's appreciated. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:34, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

== Renaming on Julia Nicol ==

I mistakenly created a wikiqoute page under the wrong person name. The content of the page is about another  person, I would appreciate your help in remaining the page title from Julia Nicol to Toyin Ajao. [[User:UniqueMonik|UniqueMonik]] ([[User talk:UniqueMonik|talk]]) 06:50, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>apn014qgvydl4z1k9psjpqp2ybm8gdn</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965210</id>
      <parentid>3965204</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:57:14Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* deletion Julia Nicol */</comment>
      <origin>3965210</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8999" sha1="g6995p6mzmm3459aplqx3wlmw6e6oi7" xml:space="preserve">{{/Header}}
{{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Administrators' noticeboard/Archive/%(counter)03d
|algo = old(15d)
|counter = 43
|maxarchivesize = 100K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}

== @Baratiiman and [[2026 Iran war]]. ==

&lt;div class=&quot;cd-moveMark&quot;&gt;''Moved from [[Wikiquote:Village pump#@Baratiiman and 2026 Iran war.]].  [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 22:07, 26 June 2026 (UTC)''&lt;/div&gt;

@[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] is posting a lot of material on [[2026 Iran war]]. Although he has been a member since 2013 he seems incapable of following basic conventions like ordering by date, basic formatting and providing citiations. Many of his posts have been translated into English from Farsi even some of the English stuff looks like it has been double translated so it doesn't matched the sourced articles. He's flooding the [[2026 Iran war]] page with multiple entries per day and some of them have nothing to do with this topic. (just because Donald Trump says something doesn't mean it's about the Iran War). I have been cleaning up this page almost every day and it's still a mess, but with the frequency of changes, poor formattinng etc. it's simpler for me to just abandon it, which is a shame as it feels like an important subject. I noticed he (gender assumed) has been blocked indefinitely by several other projects, including in his own language. Some of his content is OK, nearly everything needs work though to bring into something half presentable. Perhaps there is some option to block or topic ban this account? [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:52, 26 June 2026 (UTC)

:{{Ping|Baratiiman}} Please reply to this and can you tell us if you're an English speaker? ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 00:24, 27 June 2026 (UTC)
::i'm iranian i didn't think dates simply would be getting me permabanned and he has no problem with my &quot;posts&quot; he is himself &quot;posting&quot; PRO Iran regime propaganda i have not touched, now i quote Xi Jin PIng and he comes to you here to get me banned ... all my edits have valid sources, and if they are FARSI , well FARSI is still a language that can be translated  BEFORE I CAME HERE THIS PAGE WAS EMPTY FOR 120 DAYS OF 2026 INTERNET BLACKOUT IN IRAN

You guys are saying THIS QUOTES IS NOT RELATED TO IRAN WAR|
*Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/trump-says-iran-has-told-us-no-tolls-being-sought-strait-hormuz-2026-06-24/ ]
OR THIS ONE 

*I don't think it was us Nobody Did It on Purpose It’s horrible what happened, but there were missiles flying all over the place, and somebody said it was our missile, well, maybe it wasn’t our missile. But I’ve seen nothing to lead me to believe it was
**[https://www.jamaicaobserver.com/2026/06/24/trump-casts-doubt-us-involvement-deadly-iranian-school-strike/ ]

**Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP

*''We have given our own 20 million oil barrels to IRGC-AF aerospace force to spend to be able to fight otherwise they couldn't, security council is the only place where decision of unity was made , chief of headquarters was there , army and IRGC heads commanders were there , chief of security was there, they all said same thing , we all accepted this path we are going to go, no joke , everyone agreed now we sat and thought this'' 
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606218789 Dr Pezeshkian]

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits,we defeated them totally militarily,[Iran Deal] 
probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump]

I defy you to tell me exactly what is wrong with these
[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] ([[User talk:Baratiiman|talk]]) 18:20, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

:Quotes need to be a) relevant, b) dated, c) attributed to a named source (ideally in English), d) added in the chronological order, e) formatted correctly with * and **. There's literally hundreds of examples to look at on this page alone to see how the formatting should be! It doesn't matter if it is an Iranian person, American person, etc. There is no agenda, other than to provide a list of quotes which tell a story. The main thing is someone can read from top to bottom and read the narrative as it happens. Most of your quotes are ok, albeit always badly formatted, or not quite the source text. A few are irrelevant and should be placed on another page (e.g. your last one &quot;Over half of Democrats say they want to live in another country. Go. We can’t deport that many&quot;), the Xi one (about Trump moving fast). The main issue is you dump all your quotes out of sequence at the top of the month, or the bottom of the month. I have to go through every one, fix the markup, then find the publication date (I have to use AI to translate the Farsi to even see the date) so that everything is roughly in the order it was published.
:So basically I either have to edit every post you put on, or just abandon the page and leave it to you. Nobody else will be able to edit or read it as it will end up completely unreadable with everything out of sequence and the formatting all over the place. If you were to put it on correctly in the first place I'd just skip over the irrelevant quotes, I have better things to do with my time than make editorial decisions about every quote you provide, so I would overlook the odd stray quote if everything else was ok. But as I have been wanting to add my own quotes I've had to correct what was there and literally move and format every single quote you have put on, just to clear the ground for some more. [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 19:12, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

== Repeat vandalism on The Mummy Returns ==

The same vandal that has repeatedly visited ''[[The Mummy Returns]]'' on Wikiquote, to make the same massive cut to the page's content, to leave the same captioned image, is back again, now the most active they've been since 2022. They are now using throwaway accounts, however, and not editing from an IP address like they were doing before.

I would like to ask that ''The Mummy Returns'' be placed under protected status again. Documentation of the incidents of vandalism and all usernames/IP addresses observed is available on the movie's discussion page. As far as I can tell, the same vandal has been at this since 2016, a full 10 years. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:00, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Protected}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 16:24, 6 July 2026 (UTC)
::That should do it. Thank you for your help. It's appreciated. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:34, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

== page deletion Julia Nicol ==

I mistakenly created a wikiqoute page under the wrong person name. The content of the page is about another  person, I would appreciate your help in deleting the page. As I have already created a page for the name on the content of Julia Nicol [[User:UniqueMonik|UniqueMonik]] ([[User talk:UniqueMonik|talk]]) 06:50, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>g6995p6mzmm3459aplqx3wlmw6e6oi7</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965216</id>
      <parentid>3965210</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:41:11Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Saroj</username>
        <id>2925457</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* page deletion Julia Nicol */ Reply</comment>
      <origin>3965216</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9084" sha1="3j3xoz3gdhkgnbc95vyl2xdgr1d6t1v" xml:space="preserve">{{/Header}}
{{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Administrators' noticeboard/Archive/%(counter)03d
|algo = old(15d)
|counter = 43
|maxarchivesize = 100K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}

== @Baratiiman and [[2026 Iran war]]. ==

&lt;div class=&quot;cd-moveMark&quot;&gt;''Moved from [[Wikiquote:Village pump#@Baratiiman and 2026 Iran war.]].  [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 22:07, 26 June 2026 (UTC)''&lt;/div&gt;

@[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] is posting a lot of material on [[2026 Iran war]]. Although he has been a member since 2013 he seems incapable of following basic conventions like ordering by date, basic formatting and providing citiations. Many of his posts have been translated into English from Farsi even some of the English stuff looks like it has been double translated so it doesn't matched the sourced articles. He's flooding the [[2026 Iran war]] page with multiple entries per day and some of them have nothing to do with this topic. (just because Donald Trump says something doesn't mean it's about the Iran War). I have been cleaning up this page almost every day and it's still a mess, but with the frequency of changes, poor formattinng etc. it's simpler for me to just abandon it, which is a shame as it feels like an important subject. I noticed he (gender assumed) has been blocked indefinitely by several other projects, including in his own language. Some of his content is OK, nearly everything needs work though to bring into something half presentable. Perhaps there is some option to block or topic ban this account? [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:52, 26 June 2026 (UTC)

:{{Ping|Baratiiman}} Please reply to this and can you tell us if you're an English speaker? ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 00:24, 27 June 2026 (UTC)
::i'm iranian i didn't think dates simply would be getting me permabanned and he has no problem with my &quot;posts&quot; he is himself &quot;posting&quot; PRO Iran regime propaganda i have not touched, now i quote Xi Jin PIng and he comes to you here to get me banned ... all my edits have valid sources, and if they are FARSI , well FARSI is still a language that can be translated  BEFORE I CAME HERE THIS PAGE WAS EMPTY FOR 120 DAYS OF 2026 INTERNET BLACKOUT IN IRAN

You guys are saying THIS QUOTES IS NOT RELATED TO IRAN WAR|
*Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/trump-says-iran-has-told-us-no-tolls-being-sought-strait-hormuz-2026-06-24/ ]
OR THIS ONE 

*I don't think it was us Nobody Did It on Purpose It’s horrible what happened, but there were missiles flying all over the place, and somebody said it was our missile, well, maybe it wasn’t our missile. But I’ve seen nothing to lead me to believe it was
**[https://www.jamaicaobserver.com/2026/06/24/trump-casts-doubt-us-involvement-deadly-iranian-school-strike/ ]

**Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP

*''We have given our own 20 million oil barrels to IRGC-AF aerospace force to spend to be able to fight otherwise they couldn't, security council is the only place where decision of unity was made , chief of headquarters was there , army and IRGC heads commanders were there , chief of security was there, they all said same thing , we all accepted this path we are going to go, no joke , everyone agreed now we sat and thought this'' 
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606218789 Dr Pezeshkian]

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits,we defeated them totally militarily,[Iran Deal] 
probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump]

I defy you to tell me exactly what is wrong with these
[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] ([[User talk:Baratiiman|talk]]) 18:20, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

:Quotes need to be a) relevant, b) dated, c) attributed to a named source (ideally in English), d) added in the chronological order, e) formatted correctly with * and **. There's literally hundreds of examples to look at on this page alone to see how the formatting should be! It doesn't matter if it is an Iranian person, American person, etc. There is no agenda, other than to provide a list of quotes which tell a story. The main thing is someone can read from top to bottom and read the narrative as it happens. Most of your quotes are ok, albeit always badly formatted, or not quite the source text. A few are irrelevant and should be placed on another page (e.g. your last one &quot;Over half of Democrats say they want to live in another country. Go. We can’t deport that many&quot;), the Xi one (about Trump moving fast). The main issue is you dump all your quotes out of sequence at the top of the month, or the bottom of the month. I have to go through every one, fix the markup, then find the publication date (I have to use AI to translate the Farsi to even see the date) so that everything is roughly in the order it was published.
:So basically I either have to edit every post you put on, or just abandon the page and leave it to you. Nobody else will be able to edit or read it as it will end up completely unreadable with everything out of sequence and the formatting all over the place. If you were to put it on correctly in the first place I'd just skip over the irrelevant quotes, I have better things to do with my time than make editorial decisions about every quote you provide, so I would overlook the odd stray quote if everything else was ok. But as I have been wanting to add my own quotes I've had to correct what was there and literally move and format every single quote you have put on, just to clear the ground for some more. [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 19:12, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

== Repeat vandalism on The Mummy Returns ==

The same vandal that has repeatedly visited ''[[The Mummy Returns]]'' on Wikiquote, to make the same massive cut to the page's content, to leave the same captioned image, is back again, now the most active they've been since 2022. They are now using throwaway accounts, however, and not editing from an IP address like they were doing before.

I would like to ask that ''The Mummy Returns'' be placed under protected status again. Documentation of the incidents of vandalism and all usernames/IP addresses observed is available on the movie's discussion page. As far as I can tell, the same vandal has been at this since 2016, a full 10 years. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:00, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Protected}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 16:24, 6 July 2026 (UTC)
::That should do it. Thank you for your help. It's appreciated. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:34, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

== page deletion Julia Nicol ==

I mistakenly created a wikiqoute page under the wrong person name. The content of the page is about another  person, I would appreciate your help in deleting the page. As I have already created a page for the name on the content of Julia Nicol [[User:UniqueMonik|UniqueMonik]] ([[User talk:UniqueMonik|talk]]) 06:50, 15 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done}} [[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 07:41, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>3j3xoz3gdhkgnbc95vyl2xdgr1d6t1v</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965219</id>
      <parentid>3965216</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:44:48Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* page deletion Julia Nicol */ Reply</comment>
      <origin>3965219</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9198" sha1="qqshc6jmvqti7fjxqg9jezwe76cbxn6" xml:space="preserve">{{/Header}}
{{User:MABot/config
|archive = Wikiquote:Administrators' noticeboard/Archive/%(counter)03d
|algo = old(15d)
|counter = 43
|maxarchivesize = 100K
|minthreadsleft = 2
|archiveheader = 
|minthreadstoarchive = 1
}}

== @Baratiiman and [[2026 Iran war]]. ==

&lt;div class=&quot;cd-moveMark&quot;&gt;''Moved from [[Wikiquote:Village pump#@Baratiiman and 2026 Iran war.]].  [[User:Codename Noreste|&lt;span style=&quot;color:#0024FF&quot;&gt;Codename Noreste&lt;/span&gt;]] ([[User talk:Codename Noreste|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Codename Noreste|contribs]]) 22:07, 26 June 2026 (UTC)''&lt;/div&gt;

@[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] is posting a lot of material on [[2026 Iran war]]. Although he has been a member since 2013 he seems incapable of following basic conventions like ordering by date, basic formatting and providing citiations. Many of his posts have been translated into English from Farsi even some of the English stuff looks like it has been double translated so it doesn't matched the sourced articles. He's flooding the [[2026 Iran war]] page with multiple entries per day and some of them have nothing to do with this topic. (just because Donald Trump says something doesn't mean it's about the Iran War). I have been cleaning up this page almost every day and it's still a mess, but with the frequency of changes, poor formattinng etc. it's simpler for me to just abandon it, which is a shame as it feels like an important subject. I noticed he (gender assumed) has been blocked indefinitely by several other projects, including in his own language. Some of his content is OK, nearly everything needs work though to bring into something half presentable. Perhaps there is some option to block or topic ban this account? [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:52, 26 June 2026 (UTC)

:{{Ping|Baratiiman}} Please reply to this and can you tell us if you're an English speaker? ―[[User:Koavf|Justin (&lt;span style=&quot;color:grey&quot;&gt;ko'''a'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:black&quot;&gt;v&lt;/span&gt;f&lt;/span&gt;)]]&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;❤[[User talk:Koavf|T]]☮[[Special:Contributions/Koavf|C]]☺[[Special:Emailuser/Koavf|M]]☯&lt;/span&gt; 00:24, 27 June 2026 (UTC)
::i'm iranian i didn't think dates simply would be getting me permabanned and he has no problem with my &quot;posts&quot; he is himself &quot;posting&quot; PRO Iran regime propaganda i have not touched, now i quote Xi Jin PIng and he comes to you here to get me banned ... all my edits have valid sources, and if they are FARSI , well FARSI is still a language that can be translated  BEFORE I CAME HERE THIS PAGE WAS EMPTY FOR 120 DAYS OF 2026 INTERNET BLACKOUT IN IRAN

You guys are saying THIS QUOTES IS NOT RELATED TO IRAN WAR|
*Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/trump-says-iran-has-told-us-no-tolls-being-sought-strait-hormuz-2026-06-24/ ]
OR THIS ONE 

*I don't think it was us Nobody Did It on Purpose It’s horrible what happened, but there were missiles flying all over the place, and somebody said it was our missile, well, maybe it wasn’t our missile. But I’ve seen nothing to lead me to believe it was
**[https://www.jamaicaobserver.com/2026/06/24/trump-casts-doubt-us-involvement-deadly-iranian-school-strike/ ]

**Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP

*''We have given our own 20 million oil barrels to IRGC-AF aerospace force to spend to be able to fight otherwise they couldn't, security council is the only place where decision of unity was made , chief of headquarters was there , army and IRGC heads commanders were there , chief of security was there, they all said same thing , we all accepted this path we are going to go, no joke , everyone agreed now we sat and thought this'' 
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606218789 Dr Pezeshkian]

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits,we defeated them totally militarily,[Iran Deal] 
probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump]

I defy you to tell me exactly what is wrong with these
[[User:Baratiiman|Baratiiman]] ([[User talk:Baratiiman|talk]]) 18:20, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

:Quotes need to be a) relevant, b) dated, c) attributed to a named source (ideally in English), d) added in the chronological order, e) formatted correctly with * and **. There's literally hundreds of examples to look at on this page alone to see how the formatting should be! It doesn't matter if it is an Iranian person, American person, etc. There is no agenda, other than to provide a list of quotes which tell a story. The main thing is someone can read from top to bottom and read the narrative as it happens. Most of your quotes are ok, albeit always badly formatted, or not quite the source text. A few are irrelevant and should be placed on another page (e.g. your last one &quot;Over half of Democrats say they want to live in another country. Go. We can’t deport that many&quot;), the Xi one (about Trump moving fast). The main issue is you dump all your quotes out of sequence at the top of the month, or the bottom of the month. I have to go through every one, fix the markup, then find the publication date (I have to use AI to translate the Farsi to even see the date) so that everything is roughly in the order it was published.
:So basically I either have to edit every post you put on, or just abandon the page and leave it to you. Nobody else will be able to edit or read it as it will end up completely unreadable with everything out of sequence and the formatting all over the place. If you were to put it on correctly in the first place I'd just skip over the irrelevant quotes, I have better things to do with my time than make editorial decisions about every quote you provide, so I would overlook the odd stray quote if everything else was ok. But as I have been wanting to add my own quotes I've had to correct what was there and literally move and format every single quote you have put on, just to clear the ground for some more. [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 19:12, 27 June 2026 (UTC)

== Repeat vandalism on The Mummy Returns ==

The same vandal that has repeatedly visited ''[[The Mummy Returns]]'' on Wikiquote, to make the same massive cut to the page's content, to leave the same captioned image, is back again, now the most active they've been since 2022. They are now using throwaway accounts, however, and not editing from an IP address like they were doing before.

I would like to ask that ''The Mummy Returns'' be placed under protected status again. Documentation of the incidents of vandalism and all usernames/IP addresses observed is available on the movie's discussion page. As far as I can tell, the same vandal has been at this since 2016, a full 10 years. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:00, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done|Protected}} indefinitely. --[[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 16:24, 6 July 2026 (UTC)
::That should do it. Thank you for your help. It's appreciated. [[User:AC9016|AC9016]] ([[User talk:AC9016|talk]]) 16:34, 6 July 2026 (UTC)

== page deletion Julia Nicol ==

I mistakenly created a wikiqoute page under the wrong person name. The content of the page is about another  person, I would appreciate your help in deleting the page. As I have already created a page for the name on the content of Julia Nicol [[User:UniqueMonik|UniqueMonik]] ([[User talk:UniqueMonik|talk]]) 06:50, 15 July 2026 (UTC)

:{{Done}} [[User:Saroj|Saroj]] ([[User talk:Saroj|talk]]) 07:41, 15 July 2026 (UTC)
::Thank you very much [[User:UniqueMonik|UniqueMonik]] ([[User talk:UniqueMonik|talk]]) 07:44, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>qqshc6jmvqti7fjxqg9jezwe76cbxn6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Last words in Doctor Who media</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>116410</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965050</id>
      <parentid>3963469</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:56:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-26997-07</username>
        <id>3315992</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Third Doctor era */</comment>
      <origin>3965050</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="117324" sha1="2zqty4t8ktn4vxnm91opyk96wn2h2rm" xml:space="preserve">Following is a collection of last and first words from ''[[Doctor Who]]'' and associated media

==The Doctor==
*'''Fear no more, Hogan... After this dreadful night has passed, your scarecrows will not walk again!'''
**Who: The Second Doctor ([[w:Patrick Troughton|Patrick Troughton]])
**Source: [[Doctor Who]]: [https://tardis.fandom.com/wiki/The_Night_Walkers_(comic_story) The Night Walkers]
**Note: Forced to regenerate by the Time Lords, the Doctor can't pick an appearance but is too late as he is sentenced to death.  However, the Time Lords do not actually carry out the execution in the end, and merely send him on missions for them, giving the official sentence in the Matrix logs as &quot;exile&quot;. After a while, The Doctor escapes and some time later animated scarecrows created by the Time Lords carry out the regeneration and his exile begins...

*'''A tear, Sarah Jane? No, don't cry. While there's life, there's...'''
**Who: The Third Doctor (Jon Pertwee)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Planet of the Spiders|Planet of the Spiders]]
**Note: The Doctor regenerates after suffering severe radiation poisoning from the planet Metebelis III.

*'''It's the end... But the moment has been prepared for.'''
**Who: The Fourth Doctor (Tom Baker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Logopolis|Logopolis]]
**Note: The Doctor is fatally wounded after falling from a radio telescope after a confrontation with The Master.

*'''Adric?'''
**Who: The Fifth Doctor (Peter Davison)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Caves of Androzani|The Caves of Androzani]]
**Note: Poisoned by a Spectrox plant, and resultantly affected by spectrox toxaemia, he hallucinates a former companion who died years earlier.

*'''I've had good innings. All those lives I have lived... I hope the footprint I leave will be... light, but apposite... who said that? Who's... there?'''
*'''Yes, I will regenerate. Our future is in safe hands...'''
**Who: The Sixth Doctor (Colin Baker)
**Source: [[w:The Sixth Doctor: The Last Adventure|The Sixth Doctor: The Last Adventure]]
** Note: The Doctor dies of radiation poisoning after deliberately piloting himself into the Rani's attack in order to prevent the Valeyard from erasing the Time Lords from history.

*'''No! Timing malfunction! The Master; he's out there! I've got to stop... him!'''
**Who: The Seventh Doctor (Sylvester McCoy)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who (film)|Doctor Who]]''
**Note: The Doctor has been mortally poisoned by anaesthetic in a botched operation due to surgeons being unfamiliar with his alien anatomy.

*'''Rose... Before I go, I just want to say you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And you know what?  So was I!'''
**Who: The Ninth Doctor (Christopher Eccleston)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Parting of the Ways|The Parting of the Ways]]
**Note: The Doctor regenerates after absorbing the energy from the heart of the TARDIS from Rose Tyler, who had used it to defeat the Dalek Emperor.

*'''I don't want to go.'''
**Who: The Tenth Doctor (David Tennant)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The End of Time (Doctor Who)|The End of Time]]
**Note: The Doctor regenerates after absorbing a fatal dose of radiation in order to save his friend Wilfred.

*'''Physician, heal thyself.'''
**Who: The Eighth Doctor (Paul McGann)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Night of the Doctor|The Night of the Doctor]]
**Note: In the midst of the Time War, the Doctor crashes on Karn with a girl, Cas and after being briefly resurrected from death by The sisterhood of Karn, triggers his regeneration with the help of the elixir of life.

*'''I hope the ears are a bit less conspicuous this time.'''
**Who: The War Doctor (John Hurt)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Day of the Doctor|The Day of the Doctor]]
**Note: After growing remarkably old and grizzled by fighting in the Time War, the War Doctor had not realized how frail his body had turned, focusing nearly all his attention on the Time War. By the conclusion of his final adventure with the Tenth and Eleventh Doctors, his regeneration is triggered automatically.

*'''Hey...'''
**Who: The Eleventh Doctor (Matt Smith)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Time of the Doctor|The Time of the Doctor]]
**Note: After aging over hundreds of years while defending Trenzalore, The Doctor is granted a new regeneration cycle from the Time Lords. This regeneration generates an immense amount of chronal regeneration energy that causes a &quot;reset&quot;, reverting him to look younger. After making his way to The TARDIS and changing his clothes, he speaks his final words to Clara who then witnesses the final stage of this regeneration into his thirteenth incarnation.

*'''Well then...Here we go. The long way round...'''
**Who: The First Doctor
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': ''[[w:Twice Upon a Time (Doctor Who)|Twice Upon a Time]]''
**Note: The Doctor makes his way back to The TARDIS after going on adventure with his future Twelfth incarnation; he opens the doors and collapses onto the floor and regenerates into his second body. 

*'''Doctor, I let you go.'''
**Who: The Twelfth Doctor (Peter Capaldi)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Twice Upon a Time (Doctor Who)|Twice Upon a Time]]
**Note: After being mortally wounded in [[w:The Doctor Falls|a battle with the Cybermen]], the Doctor attempts to force the end of his life by stalling the regeneration process. Eventually he comes to terms with living another life, and spends his final moments addressing his [[Thirteenth Doctor|next incarnation]].

*'''Right then, Doctor-whoever-I'm-about-to-be. Tag, you're it.'''
**Who: The Thirteenth Doctor (Jodie Whittaker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Doctor|The Power of the Doctor]]
**Note: After the Master directs a deadly beam towards her, the Doctor spends a final day with her companion Yaz before saying goodbye and regenerating on top of a cliff.

*'''This has been... an absolute joy.'''
**Who: The Fifteenth Doctor (Ncuti Gatwa)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Reality War|The Reality War]]
**Note: The Doctor unleashes some regenerative energy into the time vortex to save a girl called Poppy, which causes his regeneration.

==Companions==
*'''You show me so many strange mysteries. With you, I know I'm safe.'''
**Who: Katarina (Adrienne Hill)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Daleks' Master Plan|Devil's Planet]]
**Note: Katarina says this to the Doctor, shortly before getting taken hostage by the convict Kirksen, who had stowed away aboard their ship. In the following episode, Katarina kills herself and Kirksen by opening the airlock outer door, resulting in their being ejected into space.

*'''Doctor...'''
**Who: Sara Kingdom (Jean Marsh/May Warden)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Daleks' Master Plan|The Destruction of Time]]
**Note: Sara, having been aged to near-death by the Daleks' Time Destructor weapon, calls out one last time to the likewise-aged Doctor, before she disintegrates into dust.

*'''Not even us.'''
**Who: Romana I (Mary Tamm)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Armageddon Factor|The Armageddon Factor]] episode 6.
**Note: Romana I's last on-screen words, in reply to the Doctor saying that the randomizer fitted to the TARDIS controls will prevent the Black Guardian from knowing what their next destination is. She later regenerates into Romana II off-screen before the next story.

*'''Now I'll never know if I was right...'''
**Who: Adric (Matthew Waterhouse)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]''&quot; [[w: Earthshock|Earthshock]] episode 4.
**Note: Adric says this line before the freighter he is on crashes into Earth and explodes.

*'''Affirmative.'''
**Who: K-9 Mark III (John Leeson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:School Reunion (Doctor Who)|School Reunion]]
**Note: K-9 Mark III's response to Mr. Finch calling him a &quot;bad dog&quot;, after he showers the Krillitanes in their oil, eventually causing them to explode with enough force to destroy the school.

*'''Mr. Capricorn! I resign...!'''
*'''Stop me falling.'''
**Who: Astrid Peth (Kylie Minogue)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Voyage of the Damned (Doctor Who)|Voyage of the Damned]]
**Note: Astrid says this having been transported to Deck 31 to save the Doctor from execution by the Heavenly Host on Capricorn's instructions. She rams him with the forklift and they both fall to their deaths in the engine much to the Doctor's horror. For the second part, the image of her is picked up by the Doctor as she says this. Knowing there isn't anything he can do to save her, he preserves her atoms to travel across the stars forevermore.

*'''Let me be brave.'''
** Who: Clara Oswald (Jenna Coleman)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Face the Raven|Face the Raven]]
** Note: Killed by the titular Raven.

==The Master==
*'''That is my property, I believe.'''
**Who: The Master (Roger Delgado)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Frontier in Space|Frontier in Space]] episode 6.
**Note: The character's last on-screen words, said to the Third Doctor and Jo Grant as he catches them trying to escape with his mind-control device. This version of the Master later dies off-screen at an unknown point, becoming the Decaying Master.

*'''So. A new body, at last!'''
**Who: The Decaying Master (Geoffrey Beevers)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Keeper of Traken|The Keeper of Traken]] episode 4.
**Note: Said as he finds Tremas, who is transfixed to the Master's TARDIS by a booby-trap. The Decaying Master then absorbs Tremas, becoming a new incarnation.

*'''You should have killed me, Doctor!'''
**Who: The Master (Anthony Ainley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Survival (Doctor Who)|Survival]] episode 3.
**Note: The last on-screen words of this version of the Master, as he fights with the Seventh Doctor on the dying Cheetah Planet. This version of the Master is later executed by the Daleks in the opening sequence of the 1996 TV movie.

*'''Never!'''
**Who: The Master (Eric Roberts)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]: [[w: Doctor Who (film)|The Movie]]''
**Note: The Master refuses the Eighth Doctor's offer of help, before being sucked into the Eye of Harmony and destroyed.

*'''Killed by an insect! A girl! How inappropriate. Still, if the Doctor can be young and strong, then so can I. The Master, reborn!'''
**Who: Professor Yana ([[Derek Jacobi]])
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Utopia (Doctor Who)|Utopia]]
**Note: Said after being shot by Yana's assistant, Chanto, before regenerating into a younger body.

*'''You see, Missy, this is where we've always been going. This is our perfect ending. We shoot ourselves in the back.'''
**Who: The Master (John Simm)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Doctor Falls|The Doctor Falls]]
**Note: His last on-screen words, after being fatally stabbed by Missy, who he regenerates into off-screen.

*'''Yes, my dear, you will.'''
**Who: Missy (Michelle Gomez)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Doctor Falls|The Doctor Falls]]
**Note: Missy's telling her previous incarnation that it's his destiny to work with the Doctor. In response, the previous Master fatally shoots Missy with his laser screwdriver.

*'''Maybe. But if I can't be the Doctor, neither can you!'''
**Who: The Master (Sacha Dhawan)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Power of the Doctor|The Power of the Doctor]]
**Note: With his body dying as the result of a failed attempt to take over the Thirteenth Doctor, the Master redirects an energy blast from a creature he had imprisoned, causing it to fatally injure the Doctor.

==Television==
===''Doctor Who'' (1963)===
====First Doctor era====
*'''Take these things.'''
**Who: Temmosus (Alan Wheatley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Daleks (TV Story)|The Ambush]]
**Note: Tells the other Thals to take the food that the Daleks have left for them, only to be ambushed and killed by the Daleks shortly after saying this.

*'''It's too smooth!'''
**Who: Antodus (Marcus Hammond)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Daleks (TV Story)|The Rescue]]
**Note: Unable to pull himself back onto the rock face Ian and the other Thals are climbing, Antodus cuts the rope holding him up and falls to his death.

*'''Your terms of peace are hard, my lord.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Kublai Khan: Tegana, those who rise against us must be humbled.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''They shall be honoured. I promised Noghai to make an end of this matter.'''
**Who: Tegana (Derren Nesbitt)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Marco Polo (TV Story)|Assassin at Peking]]
**Note: Tegana tries to kill Kublai Khan, but then kills the vizier by mistake after saying these words. After losing a sword fight to Marco, Tegana grabs a sword and kills himself.

*'''I... I remember now. I must kill. I must kill. I must kill.'''
**Who: Jeff Garvey (Barry Jackson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Galaxy 4|The Exploding Planet]]
**Note: Garvey has been pricked by the thorn of a Varga Plant, and is already having his mind taken over. In the following episode he tries to kill his comrades Marc Cory and Gordon Lowery, but the former kills Garvey first.

*'''That's right. I'll soon be one of them. Kill... kill...'''
**Who: Gordon Lowery (Jeremy Young)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Mission to the Unknown|Mission to the Unknown]]
**Note: Lowery, having himself been pricked by the thorns of another Varga Plant and starting to visibly transform, asks Cory to kill him, and then forces him to do so by threatening to shoot him.

*'''This is Marc Cory, Special Service, reporting from the planet Kembel. The Daleks are planning the complete destruction of our galaxy. Together with the other forces of the outer galaxy, an war force is being assembled. If our galaxy is to be saved, whoever receives this message must relay the information to Earth immediately. It is vital that defence mechanisms are put into operation at once. Message ends.'''
**Who: Marc Cory (Edward de Souza)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:Mission to the Unknown|Mission to the Unknown]]
**Note: Cory records a warning of the Daleks' impending invasion. Before he can broadcast it, however, the Daleks catch up to and kill him.

*'''You, too? Sara!'''
**Who: Bret Vyon (Nicholas Courtney)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Daleks' Master Plan|The Traitors]]
**Note: Bret, upon being confronted by his fellow officer (and sister) Sara Kingdom, who kills him under the mistaken belief that he is a traitor to Earth.

*'''You will pay for your crimes against your ruler. ARGH! You cannot... kill... me!'''
**Who: Mavic Chen (Kevin Stoney)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Daleks' Master Plan|The Destruction of Time]]
**Note: Chen, having deluded himself into believing that he is immortal and the ruler of the Daleks, is killed by them after they deem him of no further use.

* '''The planet offers everything we need, but I must warn you. Listen to this carefully. When we first arrived, we exited-'''
**Who: Two (Ralph Carrigan)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Ark|The Return]]
**Note: Killed when a Refusian causes his landing craft to explode while he is reporting to the other Monoids about the Refusians.

*'''A five. Hurray, I've won! Hurrah for me! Yaroo- AAARGH!'''
**Who: Cyril (Peter Stephens)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Celestial Toymaker|The Final Test]]
**Note: Cyril scores a winning throw on the TARDIS hopscotch game, only to slip on a trap he had left for Steven and Dodo, causing him to fall onto an electrified floor and be killed.

*'''Emergency control! Quick, Brett!'''
**Who: Krimpton (John Cater)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The War Machines|The War Machines]] episode 4
**Note: Said when a war machine reprogrammed by the Doctor to attack WOTAN enters its central chamber. Krimpton tries throwing himself in front of the war machine, which kills him with a gas blast.

*'''I am WOTAN. You will obey. Do not-'''
**Who: WOTAN (Gerald Taylor)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The War Machines|The War Machines]] episode 4
**Note: With one of its own war machines attacking it, WOTAN fruitlessly tries to regain control before being destroyed, immobilising all the war machines and freeing those under WOTAN's hypnotic influence.

*'''We are equipped to survive. We are only interested in survival. Anything else is of no importance. Your deaths will not affect us.'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Polly: But I can't make you understand! You're condemning us all to die! Have you no heart?]''&lt;br/&gt;'''No. That is one of the weaknesses that we have removed.'''
**Who: Krail (Reg Whitehead)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tenth Planet|The Tenth Planet]] episode 2.
**Note: Krail, after rejecting Polly's attempts at reasoning with the Cybermen, is killed by General Cutler with a stolen Cyberman weapon.

*'''The enemy? The enemy? I'll tell you who the enemy is. You! You! You killed my son!'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Dyson: But sir, they've landed!]''&lt;br/&gt;'''The only person I gave a care about in this whole world, and you killed him. Now I'm going to kill you all, and I'll start with you, Doctor!'''
**Who: General Cutler (Robert Beatty)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tenth Planet|The Tenth Planet]] episode 4.
**Note: After losing contact with his son's spacecraft, Cutler announces his intention to kill the Doctor, Ben, and Barclay for sabotaging the Z-bomb. Before he can do so, another squadron of Cybermen enters the control room, and Cutler is gunned down after he fruitlesly tries to shoot one of the Cybermen.

*'''The humans are behind the door. Let the gas do its work.'''
**Who: Krang (Harry Brooks)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tenth Planet|The Tenth Planet]] episode 4.
**Note: Needing to set off the Z-bomb in order to destroy Earth before Mondas can self-destruct from energy over-absorption, Krang has the Z-bomb chamber flooded with toxic gas. Before it can poison Ben and Dyson, they emerge from the room with nuclear fuel rods, the radiation from which weakens and kills Krang.

====Second Doctor era====
*'''Ah, so you've come at last. I'm from Earth. I'm the Examiner.'''
**Who: Examiner (Martin King)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Daleks|The Power of the Daleks]] episode 1.
**Note: Said to the Doctor, who he mistakes as a representative from the Earth colony on the planet Vulcan. The Examiner is then killed by an unseen figure, later revealed to be Bragen.

*'''I don't like it, I tell you! We don't know what these things can do.'''
**Who: Resno (Edward Kelsey)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Daleks|The Power of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: Suspecting that the Dalek they've found in a crashed spaceship is actually alive, Resno voices his concerns to Lesterson, who ignores him. The Dalek, aware that Resno has seen through it, stages an accident by shooting Resno dead in a test.

*'''Is it a weapon of some kind?'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Bragen: I'll arrange a demonstration for you. Do you still refuse my offer?]''&lt;br/&gt;'''I will not be intimidated!'''
**Who: Hensell (Peter Bathurst)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Daleks|The Power of the Daleks]] episode 5.
**Note: With Hensell refusing Bragen's demands to surrender the position of governor to him, Bragen has one of the Daleks supposedly under his control shoot him dead.

*'''I tell you, it's clear! Come on! Oh...'''
**Who: Janley (Pamela Ann Davy)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Daleks|The Power of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: With the Daleks massacring the colony's population, Janley calls out to Quinn and Valmar thinking she's found a route to safety, but is proven wrong and gunned down by a Dalek.

*'''I want to help you.'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Dalek: Why?]''&lt;br/&gt;'''I am your servant.'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Dalek: We do not need humans now.]''&lt;br/&gt;'''But you wouldn't kill me. I gave you life.'''
**Who: Lesterson (Robert James)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Daleks|The Power of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: Lesterson, having gone insane after learning of the Daleks' true nature, manages to recover his sanity long enough to distract the Daleks from the Doctor's attempt to overload the system supplying them with power. Lesterson is shot dead, but his sacrifice gives the Doctor the time he needs to destroy all the Daleks.

*'''You'll obey me, or-'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Quinn: Your day is over, Bragen. No-one will obey you now.]''&lt;br/&gt;'''I'm still the governor, and you will... Valmar...!'''
**Who: Bragen (Bernard Archard)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Power of the Daleks|The Power of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: With the Daleks having been destroyed, Bragen attempts to retake control of the colony and prepares to shoot Quinn, but is himself shot dead by his former right-hand man Valmar, who had previously overhead Bragen telling Janley about his intention to dispose of the rebels.

*'''No! No, you cannot do this to me! No, no!'''
**Who: Professor Zaroff (Joseph Furst)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Underwater Menace|The Underwater Menace]] episode 4.
**Note: Zaroff is trapped behind a shutter, just a few feet away from the activation trigger for his planet-destroying weapon, as Atlantis floods. He is unable to escape in time, and drowns.

*'''No time for me.'''
**Who: Edward Waterfield (John Bailey)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Evil of the Daleks|The Evil of the Daleks]] episode 7.
**Note: Dies after being shot by one of the Emperor Dalek's personal guards when it tried to kill the Doctor.

*'''This is your Emperor speaking. There is danger here. Obey me! Do not fight in here! Do not fight in here! I said, obey! Obey me! Obey me, your Emperor! Do not fight in here! Do not fight in here! Obey! OBEY! OBEY! We will all be exterminated! Annihilated! The Dalek race will die out completely! Obey your Emperor! Obey-'''
**Who: Dalek Emperor (Peter Hawkins)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Evil of the Daleks|The Evil of the Daleks]] episode 7.
**Note: As the Human Factor-infused Daleks launch a full-scale assault on the Emperor's control room, the Emperor futilely tries to order all the Daleks to back down, before being destroyed in the crossfire.

*'''The Daleks must not, cannot be destroyed. The race will survive. The Daleks will live and rule, forever!'''
**Who: Theodore Maxtible (Marius Goring)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Evil of the Daleks|The Evil of the Daleks]] episode 7.
**Note: With the Dalek city falling apart in the midst of the civil war, the brainwashed and Dalek Factor-infused Maxtible runs into a building intending to join the fight, and subsequently dies when the building collapses.

*'''No. You have broken your promise.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Cyber Controller: Cybermen do not promise. Such ideas have no value. Open.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''No!'''
**Who: Kaftan (Shirley Cooklin)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tomb of the Cybermen|Tomb of the Cybermen]] episode 4.
**Note: After Toberman has knocked out Klieg, the Cyber Controller orders Kaftan to open the tombs. Kaftan refuses, so he does it for her. Kaftan then closes the hatch and tries to shoot the Cyber Controller with a handgun, only for him to blast her with his laser.

*'''Oh, you're stupid. You still think that your puny minds can survive against us? You're decadent, weak. Do you know that? Weak!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: Alright, go ahead, kill us.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''No. I have a better idea. A much better idea. I shall leave you to the Cybermen. I'm sure they'll have some use for you. Or parts of you!
**Who: Eric Klieg (George Pastell)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tomb of the Cybermen|Tomb of the Cybermen]] episode 4.
**Note: Klieg decides to leave the Doctor and his friends to be killed by the Cybermen, only for one of them to kill him.

*'''We must survive. We must survive.'''
**Who: The Cyber Controller (Michael Kilgarriff)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tomb of the Cybermen|Tomb of the Cybermen]] episode 4.
**Note: The Cyber Controller tries to escape from the control room, which the Doctor has rigged to be electrified when the doors close, but Toberman stops him at the doors to the tomb. When the doors are closed, the Cyber Controller is electrocuted to death.

*'''They shall never pass Toberman! The door is closed!'''
**Who: Toberman (Roy Stewart)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Tomb of the Cybermen|Tomb of the Cybermen]] episode 4.
**Note: Toberman closes the doors to the Cyber Tombs, electrocuting himself and the Cyber Controller in the process.

*'''There's never been such a discovery as this. All my life-'''
**Who: Arden (George Waring)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w:The Ice Warriors|The Ice Warriors]] episode 3.
**Note: After Arden and Jamie discover the Ice Warriors' ship, Varga and his warriors shoot them both down. Arden is killed, but his body protects Jamie, who is merely knocked out.

*'''But, but, but... I want to help you!'''
**Who: Storr  (Angus Lennie)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Ice Warriors|The Ice Warriors]] episode 4.
**Note: Storr tries to side with the Ice Warriors, but they think he's useless and they kill him.

*'''What we need is someone like Penley, or that Doctor. Somebody who can think. Not with a machine. And what good's your precious computer done anyway? Nothing! Nothing but trouble! And it's time somebody put a stop to it!'''
**Who: Walters (Malcolm Taylor)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Ice Warriors|The Ice Warriors]] episode 6.
**Note: Thinking that the computer has caused the problems, Walters tries to smash it, only for Miss Garrett to shoot him with her tranquilizer gun. Later, when Varga and two of his warriors enter the control room, Walters tries to shoot Varga, only to get blasted.

*'''It was not power in the engines, Zondal, it was heat. The heat from the Ioniser.'''
**Who: Varga (Bernard Bresslaw)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Ice Warriors|The Ice Warriors]] episode 6.
**Note: In an attempt to return to Mars, Varga's lieutenant, Zondal, thinks that his engines have got power, but it's actually the Ioniser's heat. The resulting explosion kills the Ice Warriors, including Varga.

*'''Well, if I'm gonna die, Salamander, you're gonna die with me.'''
**Who: Giles Kent (Bill Kerr)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Enemy of the World|The Enemy of the World]] episode 6.
**Note: Having been fatally shot by Salamander, Kent pulls the activation switch for the base's self-destruct system, and dies in the resulting explosion.

*'''And now I'm going to kill you.'''
**Who: Ramon Salamander (Patrick Troughton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Enemy of the World|The Enemy of the World]] episode 6.
**Note: Said to the Second Doctor as they fight each other in the console room. Salamander then tries to have the TARDIS take off, but doesn't realise that he needs to close the doors first, causing it to go out of control and leading to Salamander being ejected into the space-time vortex and condemned to float in limbo for all eternity.

*'''Every word has been heard on Earth!'''
**Who: Fewsham (Terry Scully)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Seeds of Death|The Seeds of Death]] episode 5.
**Note: Fewsham has activated the video link, allowing the people of Earth to hear the Ice Warriors' plans. Slaar then orders one of his warriors to kill him.

*'''Slaar! We are passing between Earth and moon! The signal has not led us into the moon's gravitational field!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Slaar: Have you lost my signal?]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Your signal is being received clearly, but we're off course!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Slaar: Are you sure your calculations are correct?]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Our calculations have been checked! You have sent us into an orbit close to the sun!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Slaar: Use your retro-active rockets to change course!]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''It is too late! We have insufficient fuel for manoeuver! You have failed us, Slaar! We shall all die! We are being drawn into the orbit of the sun!'''
**Who: The Grand Marshall (Graham Leaman)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Seeds of Death|The Seeds of Death]] episode 6.
**Note: Slaar's homing beam has been hijacked by the Doctor, sending the Grand Marshall into the sun.

*'''Earth will still die. The fungus will take the oxygen from your atmosphere.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: No, I'm afraid you've failed there too. We can destroy the fungus.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Kill him!'''
**Who: Slaar (Alan Bennion)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Seeds of Death|The Seeds of Death]] episode 6.
**Note: After the Grand Marshall's fleet is sent spiraling into the sun, Slaar orders his remaining Ice Warrior to kill the Doctor, but Jamie distracts the Ice Warrior, allowing the Doctor to divert the Ice Warrior's aim so that Slaar dies.

*'''He wanted to stop the war games. He was an incompetent fool, jealous of my position. Surely, you realise that? He forged that recording you heard. He wanted to stop the war games! He tried to-'''
**Who: The War Chief (Edward Brayshaw)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The War Games (Doctor Who)|The War Games]] episode 9.
**Note: The War Chief futilely tries to deny killing the Security Chief, leading to the War Lord having his guards execute him.

*'''No... no... NO!'''
**Who: The War Lord (Philip Madoc)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The War Games (Doctor Who)|The War Games]] episode 10.
**Note: The War Lord's last spoken words, before the Time Lords erase him from history as punishment for his mass-kidnapping of military personnel from Earth's history.

====Third Doctor era====
*'''No one can destroy the Nestenes!'''
**Who: Channing (Hugh Burden)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Spearhead from Space|Spearhead from Space]] episode 4
**Note: Channing's last spoken words before he awakens the Nestene Consciousness to attack the Doctor. When the Nestene Consciousness is destroyed, Channing is deactivated and reduced to a faceless mannequin.

*'''Yes.'''
**Who: Harry Slocum (Walter Randall)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 1
**Note: Said in response to Professor Stahlman's asking him if he's finished repairing the pipe. During the process of making the repair, Slocum was exposed to the green ooze emitting from it, causing him to begin transforming into a Primord, and he dies in the following episode from a combination of gunshot wounds and not being warm enough to finish the transformation.

*'''Yes, yes, that's right. All readings normal, no peaks at all. I've done a complete routine check. No, everything's very quiet up here.'''
**Who: John Bromley (Ian Fairbairn)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 1
**Note: Bromley says this during a phone call, unaware that the infected Harry Slocum is sneaking into the reactor control room. Slocum incapacitates Bromley, transmitting the Primord infection to him in the process, and Bromley escapes, lurking around the Project Inferno facility until late in the story, when the Doctor kills him with a fire extinguisher.

*'''Can you hear me, Dr. Williams? Let us... let us out!'''
**Who: Director Eric Stahlman (Olaf Pooley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 5
**Note: Director Stahlman's last spoken words, just before he completely transforms into a Primord. The transformed Stahlman dies in the following episode, after being sprayed by a fire extinguisher by Greg Sutton.

*'''Leave me be!'''
**Who: Platoon Under-Leader Benton (John Levene)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 5
**Note: Benton warns Sutton off trying to help him, having been infected by the Stahlman Primord. Afterwards, Benton himself rapidly transforms into a Primord, and is presumably killed in the destruction of the alternate Earth.

*'''We helped him, we have every right to go. I'll give you until the count of three. One...''' &lt;br&gt;''[The Doctor: You'll have to shoot me, Brigade Leader. I have no intention of taking you.]'' &lt;br&gt;'''Two... Thr-'''
**Who: Brigade Leader Lethbridge-Stewart (Nicholas Courtney)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 6
**Note: The Brigade Leader tries to force the Doctor at gunpoint to take the Project Inferno survivors to his universe, despite his protestations that this is impossible. Section Leader Shaw eventually shoots the Brigade Leader dead to allow the Doctor to escape.

*'''Go on, Doctor, get on with it!'''
**Who: Greg Sutton (Derek Newark)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 6
**Note: Sutton encouraging the Doctor to escape, as the alternative Earth begins to completely disintegrate. He, along with Dr. Williams and Section Leader Shaw, is presumably killed by a lava flow.

*'''Go on, Doctor, go now!'''
**Who: Section Leader Elizabeth Shaw (Caroline John)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 6
**Note: Shaw encouraging the Doctor to escape, as the alternative Earth begins to completely disintegrate. She, along with Dr. Williams and Greg Sutton, is presumably killed by a lava flow.

*'''GREG!'''
**Who: Dr. Petra Williams (Sheila Dunn)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 6
**Note: Williams calls out to Greg Sutton as she spots a rapidly-approaching lava throw, which presumably kills them both along with Section Leader Shaw.

*'''All of you leave this area immediately! Go on! I shall control the last phase of this operation alone. Stand by in the drill head there. Now, go on! Get out, all of you. Go on, do as I say!'''
**Who: Dr. Eric Stahlman (Olaf Pooley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Inferno (Doctor Who)|Inferno]] episode 7
**Note: Said by Stahlman to the Project Inferno staffers, as he begins to succumb to the Primord infection. He then causes himself to completely transform by smearing the slime produced by the drill into his face, before being killed by the Doctor and our universe's Greg Sutton with fire extinguishers.

*'''It's beyond me.'''
**Who: John Farrell (Stephen Jack)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Terror of the Autons|Terror of the Autons]] episode 2.
**Note: Character's last spoken words before he is killed by a living plastic troll doll given to him by the Master.

*'''No, no! A friend! I'm a friend!'''
**Who: Bert the landlord (Don McKillop)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Daemons|The Daemons]] episode 5.
**Note: When Bok comes out of the church to deal with UNIT, Bert tries to convince him that he is his friend, only to get killed.

*'''This action does not relate! There is no data! It does not relate! Go! Leave me! All of you!'''
**Who: Azal (Stephen Thorne)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Daemons|The Daemons]] episode 5.
**Note: When the Doctor refuses to take Azal's power, Azal tries to kill him, but Jo offers herself to be killed instead of the Doctor. Confused, Azal self-destructs.

*'''I'm sorry, they were too quick for us. They escaped in the darkness.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Gold Dalek: You are lying! You have betrayed the Daleks!]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''No! I told you before! Those security guards are no match for humans!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Gold Dalek: You are a traitor to the Daleks! You must be exterminated!]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Who knows? I may have helped to exterminate you!'''
**Who: The Controller (Aubrey Woods)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Day of the Daleks|Day of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: The Controller has let the Doctor and Jo escape the future and return to the present, and then goes to falsify his report to the Daleks. Unfortunately, the Gold Dalek has been told the truth by the head guard and exterminates him.

*'''Oh no, not this time. This time it's going to be different!'''
**Who: Shura (Jimmy Winston)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Day of the Daleks|Day of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: Shura at first believes that he must kill Sir Reginald Styles to prevent the war, but when the Doctor and Jo tell him that the Daleks are coming into the house where Styles is supposed to have his meeting, he tells them to leave so he can set off a bomb which destroys the house, the Daleks and himself.

*'''I wanted to save our world. To preserve the old ways. Perhaps I was wrong, Peladon. I hope so. The future you set so much store by is yours now.'''
**Who: Hepesh (Geoffrey Toone)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Curse of Pelason|The Curse of Peladon]] episode 4.
**Note: Hepesh says this line after being fatally injured by Aggedor. He soon dies in King Peladon's arms.

*'''I shall attend to the security of my prisoner. Go on, man, move!'''
**Who: Colonel George Trenchard (Clive Morton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Sea Devils|The Sea Devils]] episode 4.
**Note: Said to a guard before Trenchard opens fire at the attacking Sea Devils, slowing down their efforts to rescue the Master and buying time for the prison guards to escape before Trenchard is killed.

*'''This device is causing the power to overload!'''
**Who: Chief Sea Devil (Peter Forbes-Robertson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Sea Devils|The Sea Devils]] episode 6.
**Note: The Chief Sea Devil says this line before he and the other Sea Devils are killed in a massive explosion caused by the Doctor sabotaging the machine which was supposed to revive Sea Devils globally.

*'''Doctor, you've destroyed my dreams! I'll destroy you!'''
**Who: The Marshal of Solos (Paul Whitsun-Jones)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Mutants|The Mutants]] episode 6.
**Note: The Marshal says this line before Ky enters and kills him.

*'''It's back this way.'''
**Who: Vaber (Prentis Hancock)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Planet of the Daleks|Planet of the Daleks]] episode 5.
**Note: Vaber tries to make a break for freedom after the Daleks try to interrogate him so they can know where the Plain of Stones is, but he gets killed.

*'''He ordered an immediate report.'''
**Who: Wester (Roy Skelton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Planet of the Daleks| Planet of the Daleks]] episode 5.
**Note: Wester says this line before he releases the bacteria which the Daleks are planning to use to kill all life on Spiridon, killing him and trapping 2 of the Daleks in the room where the bacteria is.

*'''It has not been possible! We have been unable to use the bacteria bomb!'''
**Who: Dalek Leader (Michael Wisher)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Planet of the Daleks|Planet of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: The Dalek Supreme tells the Dalek Leader that he was supposed to kill the Doctor and his friends, but the Dalek Leader objects with this line before the Dalek Supreme tells him he has failed and exterminates him.

*'''I'm cross-feeding the generator circuitry. In two minutes the whole place'll go up. Warn the others! Get out! You have two minutes!'''
**Who: Jocelyn Stevens (Jerome Willis)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Green Death|The Green Death]] episode 6.
**Note: After BOSS' mental connection over Stevens is broken, Stevens warns the Doctor to leave as he sets the building to self-destruct.

*'''Who would have thought it would come to this? Stevens, my friend, my sentimental friend, my friiieeeEEEEE--'''
**Who: BOSS (John Dearth)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Green Death|The Green Death]] episode 6.
**Note: BOSS' mental connection over Stevens is broken, allowing Stevens to set the Global Chemicals building to self-destruct, taking himself and BOSS with it.

*'''So, destroy my castle by sorcery, would you, toad face? Well, Irongron's magic is too strong for you!'''
**Who: Irongron (David Daker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Time Warrior|The Time Warrior]] episode 4.
**Note: Irongron is frustrated that Linx is going to destroy his castle and tries to kill him, only to get shot down by Linx's ray gun.

*'''Now that's enough!'''
**Who: Commander Azaxyr (Alan Bennion)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Monster of Peladon|The Monster of Peladon]] episode 6.
**Note: After fending off Gebek and the other miners, Azaxyr is stabbed by one of Queen Thalira's guards.

*'''I'm afraid this old body has had it, Miss Smith.'''
**Who: K'Anpo (George Cormack)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Planet of the Spiders|Planet of the Spiders]] episode 6.
**Note: Last words prior to regenerating into a new body, after being fatally injured by energy bolts emitted by the spiders' minions.

*'''You superstitious fools!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Queen Spider: Be silent, Lupton!]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''I will not be silent! To think that I've lost my chance of power through a spider! A spider that I could crush underfoot without a second thought! A SPIDER!'''
**Who: Lupton (John Dearth)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Planet of the Spiders|Planet of the Spiders]] episode 6.
**Note: When Lupton tries to take the crystal from the Doctor, the Queen Spider stops him. As the Doctor goes to deliver the crystal to the Great One, Lupton gets frustrated that his chance of power is gone and moves to strike down the Queen, only for her to zap him.

*'''All praise to the Great One! All praise to me! Bow down before me, planets! Bow down, stars! Bow down, all galaxies and worship the Great One! The me! The great, all powerful me! AAAAAAHHHH! I HURT! HELP ME, I AM BURNING, MY BRAIN IS ON FIRE! HELP MEEEEEE! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!'''
**Who: The Great One (Maureen Morris)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Planet of the Spiders|Planet of the Spiders]] episode 6.
**Note: Thinking her goal is complete when she takes the blue crystal from the Doctor to complete her crystal web so her mental powers can be increased, the Great One starts to gloat. Unfortunately for her, radiation build up in the web and, since there's now way to vent it, her mind is destroyed.

====Fourth Doctor era====
*'''No, no, don't! He was only telling-'''
**Who: Professor Kettlewell (Edward Burnham)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Robot (Doctor Who)|Robot]] episode 4.
**Note: Kettlewell tries to talk down the K1 robot from killing the Doctor, but is accidentally hit by a blast from the disintegrator ray being held by K1, and is himself killed instead.

*'''You will be safe. See how I deal with our enemies.'''
**Who: K1 (Michael Kilgarriff)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Robot (Doctor Who)|Robot]] episode 4.
**Note: The now-gigantic K1 places the captive Sarah-Jane on a rooftop before it takes on a squad of UNIT soldiers. The Doctor later uses Professor Kettlewell's metal-eating virus to destroy K1.

*'''Please, Commander, stay back! Please! Don't force me to-'''
**Who: Libri (Christopher Master)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Ark in Space|The Ark in Space]] episode 2.
**Note: Libri confronts Noah who is being taken over by the Wirrn, but is unwilling to shoot him, allowing Noah to take the gun and kill him with it.

*'''You don't want trouble with the Space Technician's union, Doctor.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: What?]'' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Knocks him out]'' '''That's my job.'''
**Who: Rogin (Richardson Morgan)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Ark in Space|The Ark in Space]] episode 4.
**Note: Rogin knocks the Doctor out so that he can move him to safety while the shuttle containing the Wirrn can take off. He is then killed when he is caught in the exhaust blast.

*'''Goodbye, Vira...'''
**Who: Noah (Kenton Moore)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: The Ark in Space|The Ark in Space]] episode 4.
**Note: After his body is fully transformed into an insectoid Wirrn, Noah leads the Wirrn swarm into a shuttle which is set to self-destruct. His final words are a message to the woman he was supposed to marry.

*'''No, Davros!'''&lt;br /&gt;''[Davros: Exterminate! Exterminate! Exterminate!]''&lt;br /&gt;'''No! No! NO!'''
**Who: Ronson (James Garbutt)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Genesis of the Daleks|Genesis of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: Ronson unsuccessfully pleads for his life after Davros falsely accuses him of being a Thal spy, leading to his becoming the first person ever to be killed by the Daleks.

*'''You are ''insane'', Davros!'''
**Who: Gharman (Dennis Chinnery)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Genesis of the Daleks|Genesis of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: Gharman says this line before Davros summons the Daleks to kill him and all the other Kaleds who are against Davros.

*'''Stop this, Davros! You must stop them!'''
**Who: Kravos (Andrew Johns)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Genesis of the Daleks|Genesis of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: When Davros sets his Daleks on everyone who is against him, Kravos orders him to stop, only for Nyder to throw him into the path of a Dalek gun.

*'''Yes, Davros.'''
**Who: Nyder (Peter Miles)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'': [[w: Genesis of the Daleks|Genesis of the Daleks]] episode 6.
**Note: When a Dalek activates the production line to create more Daleks, Davros orders him to turn it off. When the Dalek refuses, Davros orders Nyder to do so instead. The Dalek then exterminates Nyder.

*'''It's coming towards us. It's set on a collision course!'''
**Who: Magrik (Michael Wisher)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revenge of the Cybermen|Revenge of the Cybermen]] episode 4.
**Note: Upon seeing that the Nerva beacon has been set on a collision course with Voga, Magrik tries to carry out Vorus' order to launch the Skystriker, but is shot dead by Tyrum before he can do so.

*'''My Skystriker! My Glory!'''
**Who: Vorus (David Collings)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revenge of the Cybermen|Revenge of the Cybermen]] episode 4.
**Note: Despite being fatally injured by Tyrum, Vorus manages to launch the rocket he calls Skystriker to try and destroy the beacon where the Doctor and Sarah are.

*'''The Skarasen will destroy you all.'''
**Who: Broton (John Woodnutt)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Terror of the Zygons|Terror of the Zygons]] episode 4.
**Note: Dies after being shot by the Brigadier.

*'''Master, spare me. Spare me. I am a true servant of the great Sutekh.'''
**Who: Ibrahim Namin (Peter Mayock)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Pyramids of Mars|Pyramids of Mars]] episode 1.
**Note: Mistaking Scarman for Sutekh, Namin kneels before him, only for Scarman to kill him.

*'''Who dares to interfere!?''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: You're caught in a temporal trap, Sutekh.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Time Lord! I shall destroy you! I shall destroy you!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: How long do Osirans live, Sutekh?]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Release me!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: Never. You're caught in the corridor of eternity.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Release me, insect, or I shall destroy the cosmos!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: You're a thousand years beyond the twentieth century now, Sutekh. Go on for another ten thousand.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''I'll spare the planet Earth! I'll give it to you as a plaything! RELEASE ME!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: No, Sutekh. The time of the Osirans is long past.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''NOOOOOOOOO!'''
**Who: Sutekh (Gabriel Woolf)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Pyramids of Mars|Pyramids of Mars]] episode 4.
**Note: Before Sutekh can escape the time tunnel, the Doctor stops him and sends him into the future, aging him to death. Character later returns in [[w: The Legend of Ruby Sunday|The Legend of Ruby Sunday]].

*'''Derek!'''
**Who: Charles Winlett (John Gleeson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Seeds of Doom|The Seeds of Doom]] episode 1.
**Note: Winlett calls out for colleague Derek Moberly after being infected by a Krynoid pod. Winlett remains unconscious until he fully transforms into a Krynoid, which is subsequently destroyed by a bomb set by Scorby.

*'''You're as bad as Chase and the others. You want me to die! You want me to die! You want me to die!'''
**Who: Arnold Keeler (Mark Jones)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Seeds of Doom|The Seeds of Doom]] episode 4.
**Note: Keeler, having already been infected by a Krynoid pod, angrily shouts this at Sarah Jane Smith when she reluctantly refuses to help him, knowing that he is on the verge of fully transforming. The Krynoid that was Keeler is later destroyed in a UNIT airstrike.

*'''We're as dead as mutton, you realise? RIP. It's ridiculous, isn't it?'''
**Who: Scorby (John Challis)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Seeds of Doom|The Seeds of Doom]] episode 6.
**Note: As the Krynoid is demolishing the mansion that the Doctor, Sarah and Scorby are trapped in, Scorby says these words before attempting to escape the mansion. His attempt is stopped by the plants forcing him underwater and drowning him.

*'''You and your kind are parasites. You're dependent upon us for the air you breathe and the food you eat. We have only one use for you!'''
**Who: Harrison Chase (Tony Beckley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Seeds of Doom|The Seeds of Doom]] episode 6.
**Note: As Sarah is searching for Henderson in the basement, Chase tells her that Henderson has been put in his compost machine and then decides to put her in there as well. Later, the Doctor shows up and releases Sarah, only to get into a struggle with Chase. In the end, the Doctor tries to save Chase from being crushed, but Chase tries to pull him in, but fails and dies.

*'''You will take me back!'''
**Who: Eldrad (Stephen Thorne)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Hand of Fear|The Hand of Fear]] episode 4.
**Note: Eldrad unsuccessfully demands that the Doctor take him from the dead planet of Kastria back to Earth, before the Doctor uses his scarf to trip Eldrad into falling to his death.

*'''Not me, you fool! Him! I am your master! Taren Capel!'''
**Who: Taren Capel (David Bailie)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Robots of Death|The Robots of Death]] episode 4.
**Note: Taren Capel says this line before he is strangled to death by one of the Sandminer robots who fails to recognise him due to Leela releasing helium into the atmosphere.

*'''Sin! Sin, what are you doing!? I order you to... No, no, not me! This is mutiny, Sin!
**Who: Magnus Greel (Michael Spice)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Talons of Weng-Chiang|The Talons of Weng-Chiang]] episode 6
**Note: Greel says these words when Mr. Sin tries to kill him with the laser cannon built into a dragon statue. After Leela deactivates the laser by shooting it, Greel tries to kill her, but the Doctor shoves him into his own extraction cabinet, resulting in his life force being drained from his body.

*'''You fool! Do you think a metal barrier can contain the Swarm!?'''
**Who: The Nucleus (John Leeson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Invisible Enemy|The Invisible Enemy]] episode 4.
**Note: In his container, the Nucleus says these words to the Doctor, who puts a blaster next to the door, so it will set off the explosive gas he has released into the base. As the Doctor, Leela and K9 escape, the Nucleus opens the door and triggers the blaster, causing the base to explode.

*'''Don't you dare. I'm an official of the company!'''
**Who: Gatherer Hade (Richard Leech)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Sun Makers|The Sun Makers]] episode 4.
**Note: Hade fruitlessly tries to warn off a gang of rebels, who then throw him to his death from the roof of a building.

*'''Doctor. This grenade will give me a lot of pleasure.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: You'll destroy us all.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Yes. It is a glory to die for a glorious Sontaran empire.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: But you'll destroy this entire galaxy.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Yes, and all of the Time Lords with it.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: And your battlefield.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Yes, Doctor. But it is a small price to pay. If we cannot control the power of the Time Lords, then we shall destroy it. Goodbye, Doctor!'''
**Who: Commander Stor (Derek Deadman)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Invasion of Time|The Invasion of Time]] episode 6.
**Note: Just as Stor is about to destroy the TARDIS using a grenade, the Doctor confronts him with the De-Mat gun. Before Stor can plant his grenade, though, the Doctor shoots him.

*'''I shall be free from you, you hag!'''
**Who: The Pirate Captain (Bruce Purchase)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Pirate Planet|The Pirate Planet]] episode 4.
**Note: The Captain, just before he tries to kill Queen Xanxia. Instead, Xanxia causes his cybernetic implants to explode.

*'''Great one, we ask only that the dryfoots and their abominations be crushed by thy mighty power. Master, it is thy servant! ARGH! Varlik, Skart, help!'''
**Who: Ranquin (John Abineri)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Power of Kroll|The Power of Kroll]] episode 4.
**Note: Ranquin's attempt to pray to the enormous squid-like Kroll to destroy the humans. Instead, Kroll grabs hold of Ranquin and devours him.

*'''Sire! Sire, I have failed. The Doctor has accomplished his purpose. He has the Key to Time. Sire, I have failed.'''
**Who: The Shadow (William Squire)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Armageddon Factor|The Armageddon Factor]] episode 6.
**Note: As the Shadow's space station is destroyed by a redirected Atrian missile barrage, he informs the Black Guardian that the Doctor has succeeded in his mission.

*'''No, Hermann. No, it's me!'''
**Who: Scaroth (Julian Glover)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: City of Death|City of Death]] episode 4.
**Note: Scaroth's henchman Hermann is horrified by the monstrous true appearance of his master, and then throws a bottle at Scaroth's time machine, causing it to explode and kill him.

*'''It's lies, lies! It's all lies!'''
**Who: Adrasta (Myra Frances)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Creature from the Pit|The Creature from the Pit]] episode 4.
**Notes: Adrasta tries futilely to deny imprisoning Erato, who then kills her.

*'''Mercy, lord Nimon! I brought you the tributes!'''
**Who: Co-Pilot (Malcolm Terris)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Horns of Nimon|The Horns of Nimon]] episode 2.
**Notes: The Co-Pilot, having been sentenced to death by Soldeed for his blunders, is executed by the Nimon after unconvincingly lying about merely being there to escort the prisoners due to be sacrificed.

*'''You fools. You are all doomed. Doomed!'''
**Who: Soldeed (Graham Crowden)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Horns of Nimon|The Horns of Nimon]] episode 4.
**Notes: Soldeed sets the Nimon power complex to self-destruct; Teka tries to stop him by shooting him, but is too late.

*'''Romana!'''
**Who: Lexa (Jacqueline Hill)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Meglos|Meglos]] episode 4.
**Note: Before the Doctor, Romana, Caris and Deedrix can go to Zolfa-Thura to stop Meglos and General Grugger from destroying Tigella, a dying Gaztak tries to shoot Romana. Lexa pushes her out of the way, but is hit by the beam.

*'''Stop the countdown! Stop the clock!''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[General Grugger: Right, it must be this one.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Fool! Stop!'''
**Who: Meglos (Tom Baker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Meglos|Meglos]] episode 4.
**Note: Meglos, having heard of the Doctor making the Dodecahedron destroy Zolfa-Thura instead of Tigella, escapes from the cell he is in and tries to stop General Grugger and Lieutenant Brotadac from firing the Dodecahedron. He is too late and Zolfa-Thura is destroyed, along with him, General Grugger and Lieutenant Brotadac.

*'''Help, Nyssa!'''
**Who: Tremas (Anthony Ainley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Keeper of Traken|The Keeper of Traken]] episode 4.
**Note: Tremas, having been transfixed to the Master's TARDIS by a booby-trap, tries calling Nyssa for help. Before she can get there, the Decaying Master emerges and absorbs Tremas, becoming a new incarnation.

*'''I've done what I can, with the Registry in ruins. We must now re-align the aerial, beam the program out into space. There is a CVE close by that we might be able to re-open.'''
**Who: The Monitor (John Fraser)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Logopolis|Logopolis]] episode 4.
**Note: As Logopolis is being disintegrated by an entropy field that will destroy the entire universe if not stopped, the Monitor tries to re-open a CVE to drain the field. However, the Monitor is instead disintegrated himself by the field.

====Fifth Doctor era====
*'''You made us, man of evil, but we are free!'''
**Who: Shardovan (Derek Waring)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Castrovalva|Castrovalva]] episode 4.
**Note: After the residents of Castrovalva realise they're just part of an illusion created by the Master, Shardovan rebels and destroys the power web holding the city together, causing it to collapse.

*'''No, Doctor!'''
**Who: Monarch (Stratford Johns)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Four to Doomsday|Four to Doomsday]] episode 4.
**Note: Monarch confronts the Doctor at the doors to the TARDIS, causing the Doctor to react by throwing the entire sample of a toxin that Monarch had intended to use on Earth at him, causing Monarch to shrink away into nothing.

*'''You're all dead. Why don't you surrender?'''
**Who: Ringway (Alec Sabin)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Earthshock|Earthshock]] episode 3.
**Note: Ringway, attempting to talk the Doctor into giving himself up to the Cybermen. Ringway is killed by the Cyber-Leader in a later scene, after the Leader mistakenly assumes that Ringway betrayed them.

*'''Nyssa, get back!'''
**Who: Professor Kyle (Claire Clifford)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Earthshock|Earthshock]] episode 4.
**Note: Kyle warning Nyssa as a Cyberman tries to break into the TARDIS. She then tries to shoot the Cyberman with a weapon taken from one of its fallen comrades, but is herself shot dead first. 

*'''But you will not enjoy the victory. I shall now kill you, Doctor.'''
**Who: The Cyber-Leader (David Banks)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Earthshock|Earthshock]] episode 4.
**Note: The Cyber-Leader says this before Tegan jumps him, allowing the Doctor the chance to feed gold shavings into his chest unit, before grabbing his gun and shooting him dead.

*'''Impulse laser?'''
**Who: Talor (John D. Collins)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Arc of Infinity|Arc of Infinity]] episode 1.
**Note: Confronted by a traitor, unidentified to the audience but later revealed as Councillor Hedin, Talor remarks on the weapon which is then used to shoot him dead.

*'''No!'''
**Who: Hedin (Michael Gough)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Arc of Infinity|Arc of Infinity]] episode 3.
**Note: When the Castellan tries to shoot the Doctor dead, Hedin throws himself in front of the blast, ensuring that the Doctor will live long enough for Omega to copy his physical form.

*'''It is finished, Doctor. Can this... be death?'''
**Who: Mawdryn (David Collings)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Mawdryn Undead|Mawdryn Undead]] episode 4.
**Note: Mawdryn's final words after the release of energy caused by two versions of Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart meeting each other destroys the botched regeneration cycles of Mawdryn and his colleagues, allowing them to die.

*'''What?! No, not the mind probe!'''
**Who: The Castellan (Paul Jerricho)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Five Doctors|The Five Doctors]]
**Note: The Castellan's reaction to Borusa telling the chancellery guards to use the mind probe on him. The Castellan subsequently dies in a firefight with the guards while trying to escape.

*'''No... no!'''
**Who: Borusa (Philip Latham)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Five Doctors|The Five Doctors]]
**Note: Borusa says this on realising that the Game of Rassilon is a trap designed to turn its victims into living, immobile statues. Borusa is himself then turned into such a statue.

*'''That's it.'''
**Who: Styles (Rula Lenska)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Resurrection of the Daleks|Resurrection of the Daleks]] episode 3.
**Note: Having successfully unlocked the activation switch for the space station's self-destruct sequence, Styles says this and goes to pull it, but Lytton's troops blast open the door to the chamber and shoot her dead before she can do so.

*'''They're Dalek troopers!'''
**Who: Mercer (Jim Findley)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Resurrection of the Daleks|Resurrection of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: After Stien's mental condition relapses and briefly causes him to forget that he's turned against the Daleks, Mercer points out that the troopers confronting them are there to kill them, and dies in the resulting firefight.

*'''Hello, boys. Just in time for the fun.'''
**Who: Stien (Rodney Bewes)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Resurrection of the Daleks|Resurrection of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: Stien says this line before a Dalek exterminated him. Before he dies, he manages to hit the red self-destruct lever and blow up the space station and the battle cruiser.

*'''You will never understand, Amyand. Logar is everywhere. He cares for the faithful.'''
**Who: Timanov (Peter Wyngarde)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Planet of Fire|Planet of Fire]] episode 4.
**Note: With the planet Sarn starting to tear itself apart, Timanov and a few devotees of his religion dedicated to the supposed god Logar opt to remain behind on the planet and die, despite Amyand having proven that Logar never existed, and that an injured Timanov simply mistook a worker in a fireproof suit for a divine figure years earlier.

*'''Come on, keep moving. They won't fire.'''
**Who: Salateen (Robert Glenister)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Caves of Androzani|The Caves of Androzani]] episode 4.
**Note: Mistakenly believing that Sharaz Jek's androids have been rendered harmless, Salateen orders his troops to advance. He's quickly proven wrong when the androids open fire en masse, killing him instantly.

*'''Jek! Where's the spectrox?'''&lt;br&gt;''[Sharaz Jek: Morgus!]''&lt;br&gt;'''You take one more step and we shoot.'''
**Who: Morgus (John Normington)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Caves of Androzani|The Caves of Androzani]] episode 4.
**Note: Said upon confronting his old enemy, Sharaz Jek, and holding him at gunpoint. Jek attacks them regardless, with Morgus being killed in the ensuing fight.

*'''Salateen... Hold me...'''
**Who: Sharaz Jek (Christopher Gable)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Caves of Androzani|The Caves of Androzani]] episode 4.
**Note: After being fired upon by Stotz, Jek pushes Morgus into a laser beam and then says this line before he dies in the arms of his most developed android, Salateen.

====Sixth Doctor era====
*'''No, not that! Please, shoot me! Sh- sh-'''
**Who: Prisoner (Roger Nott)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Twin Dilemma|The Twin Dilemma]] episode 3.
**Note: The prisoner is sentenced to death for stealing vegetables from the Gastropods to feed his starving family. Mestor sentences him to death by embolism, leading to the prisoner saying this before Mestor kills him.

*'''Childish threats are best left to children, Noma.'''
**Who: Drak (Oliver Smith)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Twin Dilemma|The Twin Dilemma]] episode 4.
**Note: Said after Noma threatens the Doctor, Azmael, and their group. Drak is found dead in a later scene after it turns out that Mestor possessed him in order to spy on the group, resulting in Drak dying from being controlled for too long.

*'''What is happening?''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Azmael: You are lost, Mestor!]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''What are you doing!?'''
**Who: Mestor (Edwin Richfield)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Twin Dilemma|The Twin Dilemma]] episode 4.
**Note: After Mestor jumps into Azmael's body, the Doctor destroys the former's body using a beaker of acid he picked up in the lab. Azmael then triggers his final regeneration, killing both himself and Mestor.

*'''My only regret is leaving Jaconda. Gave me a good life. Many great moments. One of the best, my friend, was that time by the fountain.'''
**Who: Azmael (Maurice Denham)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Twin Dilemma|The Twin Dilemma]] episode 4.
**Note: After triggering his final regeneration to kill Mestor, Azmael says this line before he finally dies.

*'''I don't know. I don't have an instrument for measuring time.'''&lt;br/&gt;''[Cyber-Leader: You will answer my questions.]''&lt;br/&gt;'''I will not!'''
**Who: Flast (Faith Brown)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Attack of the Cybermen|Attack of the Cybermen]] episode 2.
**Note: Flast's response to the Cyber-Leader's attempt to interrogate her over how long ago the Doctor escaped. In response to her refusal to answer, the Leader has her thrown out of the refrigerated chamber she was in, causing her to boil to death.

*'''We made it!'''
**Who: Stratton (Jonathan David)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Attack of the Cybermen|Attack of the Cybermen]] episode 2.
**Note: Said as he arrives at the docking bay for the Cybermen's time ship, before being gunned down when a squadron of Cybermen emerges from the ship.

*'''Let's get aboard the ship before we open the champagne.'''
**Who: Griffiths (Brian Glover)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Attack of the Cybermen|Attack of the Cybermen]] episode 2.
**Note: Said in response to Stratton's line above, before the two are shot dead by the Cybermen.

*'''Give me that thing. Ready?'''
**Who: Stratton (Michael Attwell)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Attack of the Cybermen|Attack of the Cybermen]] episode 2.
**Note: Says this to Griffiths, while taking a gun from him. He then tries to open the docking bay door to the Cyermen's time ship, but is electrocuted by a forcefield, before Cybermen emerge to gun down Griffiths and Stratton.

*'''The drug is affecting my brain. Irreversible damage.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: I'm the Doctor, I'll tell you if it's irreversible or not. Now just hang on.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''I did my best. I kept my word.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[The Doctor: I know.]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Please, Doctor, kill me.
**Who: Lytton (Maurice Colbourne)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Attack of the Cybermen|Attack of the Cybermen]] episode 2.
** Note: Lytton says this line to the Doctor before the Cyber Controller enters. Lytton then stabs the Controller with a Sonic Lance which the Doctor placed in his hand and ultimately gets killed.

*'''Emotion is a weakness.'''&lt;br/&gt;''[The Doctor: I don't think so.]'' &lt;br/&gt;'''It brought you back for your friend, and it will cost you your life.'''
**Who: The Cyber-Controller (Michael Kilgarriff)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Attack of the Cybermen|Attack of the Cybermen]] episode 2.
** Note: The Cyber-Controller says this before getting stabbed by Lytton. The Controller then beats Lytton to death, before being shot dead by the Doctor, and destroyed when the Cyber-Tombs are destroyed.

*'''Aye, but let us not waste time here, miss. I'm sure I've seen it's likeness in Redfern Dell. This way, miss.''' 
**Who: Luke Ward (Gary Cady)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Mark of the Rani|The Mark of the Rani]] episode 2.
**Note: Luke, who is under the control of the Master, says this to Peri, intending to lead her into a trap. However, Luke falls victim to the trap himself by stepping on one of the Rani's landmines, which transforms him into a tree.

*'''You are English? ¿Quién esta?''' ''[Who is there?]''
**Who: Doña Arana (Aimee Delamain)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 1.
**Note: Her last words before Shockeye bludgeons her to death, so that Chessene's group can use her house as their base of operations.

*'''Yes, sir.'''
**Who: Varl (Tim Raynham)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 3.
**Note: His response to his superior Stike ordering him to send a report to Sontaran High Command and then set their ship to self-destruct. Varl is later killed by Chessene with an acid bomb.

*'''My spacecraft!'''
**Who: Stike (Clinton Greyn)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 3.
**Note: Having been burned by the same acid that killed Varl and then suffered further horrific injuries from his attempt to use a sabotaged time-travel capsule, Stike makes for his spacecraft, forgetting that he had ordered Varl to set it to self-destruct. Stike is consequently killed when it explodes.

*'''Please... take care of my beautiful moths.'''
**Who: Oscar Botcherby (James Saxon)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 3.
**Note: Said to his girlfriend Anita, before dying from a stab wound that Shockeye inflicted during an argument over his restaurant bill.

*'''The blood is warm and salt, Time Lord. I know how near you are!''' 
**Who: Shockeye (John Stratton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 3.
**Note: Having inflicted a wound on the Sixth Doctor, Shockeye hunts and taunts him, before the Doctor ambushes him with a cyanide-soaked cloth and poisons him to death.

*'''There's been enough killing, Chessene, and it's my fault. I took an Androgum, a lowly unthinking creature of instinct, and tried to set her among the gods.'''
**Who: Dastari (Laurence Payne)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 3.
**Note: Dastari, realising the foolishness of his actions, frees the Second Doctor and makes it clear that he regrets ever having helped Chessene, who reacts furiously and shoots Dastari dead.

*'''I set ''myself'' among the gods! And now, I shall liberate my people. With me as their leader, we shall reign over all other beings. STOP!'''
**Who: Chessene (Jacqueline Pearce)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Two Doctors|The Two Doctors]] episode 3.
**Note: Said in response to Dastari's last words, before shooting him dead and threatening to do the same to the Second Doctor and Peri when they try to flee. After Jamie arrives and disarms her, Chessene tries to use the same sabotaged time capsule that Stike had earlier used, which then explodes, killing Chessene.

*'''You will not destroy my people. I am the Maylin now, I will not let you.'''
**Who: Tekker (Paul Darrow)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Timelash|Timelash]] episode 2.
**Note: On discovering that the Borad intends to wipe out the native population of Karfel to repopulate the planet with mutants like himself, Tekker turns on the Borad, who reacts by ageing Tekker to death with a time-acceleration ray.

*'''No! Destroy it! Smash the mirror!'''
**Who: The Borad (Robert Ashby)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Timelash|Timelash]] episode 2.
**Note: The Borad's reaction to seeing his hideously mutated face in a mirror. The Doctor then takes advantage to push him into the Timelash, where he's banished to ancient Scotland to live out the rest of his life in exile.

*'''It is vital that the Daleks are supreme in all things!'''
**Who: Arthur Stengos (Alec Linstead)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 1.
**Note: Having been transformed into a Human-Dalek hybrid by Davros, Stengos is overtaken by the Dalek mental conditioning, forcing his reluctant daughter, Natasha, to put him out of his misery by shooting him.

*'''How dare you enter unannounced?'''&lt;br&gt;''[Dalek: You will come with us. You will be taken to Davros to answer for your crimes.]''&lt;br&gt;'''No!'''
**Who: Vogel (Hugh Walters)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: Vogel unwisely tries to stand up to some Daleks who have come to take his boss Kara prisoner, resulting in them quickly killing him.

*'''Get on with your work! Now, that's enough of-'''&lt;br&gt;''[Tasambeker: I hate you!]''&lt;br&gt;'''What... what have you done? You've killed me... Jobel...'''
**Who: Jobel (Clive Swift)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: After rejecting Tasambeker's pleas for them to flee Tranquil Repose, and openly ridiculing her affections for him, Jobel is killed by Tasambeker, who stabs and injects a syringe of embalming fluid into his heart.

*'''Oh, why did I do it?'''
**Who: Tasambeker (Jenny Tomasin)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: Immediately following Jobel's death, Tasambeker reacts with horror at her actions, before some Daleks kill her for attempting to warn Jobel that Davros wanted him dead.

*'''You've done it, master. You've killed him!'''
**Who: Bostock (John Ogwen)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: Bostock congratulates his master, Orcini on apparently killing Davros, but Orcini realises that they were able to kill &quot;Davros&quot; much too easily, after which the real Davros and a group of Daleks arrive to subdue them. Bostock later manages to blow Davros' hand off before he can activate his Dalek army, but is himself killed by a Dalek.

*'''Let's get out of here.'''
**Who: Natasha (Bridget Lynch-Blosse)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: Natasha says this line to her companion, Grigory, before a Dalek kills them both.

*'''No! Alright, it's a bomb. It's a bomb! A great big bomb!'''&lt;br&gt;''[Davros: Thank you, Kara.]''&lt;br&gt;'''You fool. You imbecile! I thought you were a man of honour! Now, we both die. Satisfied?!'''&lt;br&gt;''[Orcini: You before me.]''
**Who: Kara (Eleanor Bron)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: After the failure of Orcini's attempt on his life, Davros brings in his client, Kara, and asks Orcini to activate the supposed transmitter that Kara gave him, forcing her to reveal the device's true nature. After she berates him for failing his mission, Orcini stabs her to death for hiring him under false pretences.

*'''Hey, you listening, guys? This is the broadcast to end all broadcasts! Yee-haw!'''
**Who: The DJ (Alexei Sayle)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: With Davros having sent a squadron of Daleks to kill the DJ, he defends himself and Peri with a sonic weapon, but is killed by a Dalek after he steps out from behind the weapon mistakenly thinking he's wiped the squadron out.

*'''Return this to my order. Tell them how we died.'''&lt;br&gt;''[The Doctor: Of course.]''&lt;br&gt;'''No more words.'''
**Who: Orcini (William Gaunt)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revelation of the Daleks|Revelation of the Daleks]] episode 2.
**Note: Having had his artificial leg blown off and with Bostock already dead, Orcini resolves to use the bomb that Kara gave him to destroy Davros' army of Human-Dalek hybrids. Before the Doctor leaves, Orcini hands him his Knight of the Grand Order of Oberon insignia and asks him to return it to the Order.

*'''I am Katryca, Queen of-'''
**Who: Katryca (Joan Sims)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Mysterious Planet|The Mysterious Planet]] episode 4.
**Note: Mistakenly believing Drathro to have been destroyed, Katryca leads her tribe into assaulting his lair, only to find him still functional. When she refuses to be intimidated by him, Drathro grabs hold of her and fatally electrocutes her.

*'''Then I accept your offer. Tie these others up. I will fetch the secrets.'''
**Who: Drathro (Roger Brierly)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Mysterious Planet|The Mysterious Planet]] episode 4.
**Note: After the Doctor fails to talk down Drathro from letting his power system explode and potentially destroy the entire universe, Sabalom Glitz dupes Drathro into thinking he can be repaired if he comes aboard Glitz's ship, in exchange for the Time Lord secrets he is holding. The Doctor then manages to cause a controlled explosion of the power system, saving the universe, but destroying Drathro.

*'''That is nothing compared to what you are doing to my negotiations. If I'm not careful, I could lose an important fish concession.'''&lt;br&gt;''[Sil: But you hate fish, magnificence!]''&lt;br&gt;'''Do I?'''
**Who: Kiv (Christopher Ryan)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Mindwarp|Mindwarp]] episode 4.
**Note: Kiv's last confirmed on-screen words. While the episode's ending seemingly shows his mind being transferred into the body of Peri Brown and then killed by a rampaging King Yrcanos, the Master later confirms that this was a forgery created by the Valeyard, and that Peri was rescued and Kiv killed before the procedure.

*'''Get out of here, now! Or I'll kill both of you.'''
**Who: Bruchner (David Allister)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Terror of the Vervoids|Terror of the Vervoids]] episode 3.
**Note: Having been driven insane by the thought of the Vervoids reaching Earth and wiping out humanity, Bruchner hijacks the ''Hyperion 3'' and tries to steer it into a black hole. He dies at the start of the following episode when the Vervoids fill the ship's bridge with marsh gas, choking him to death.

*'''No, no. I'm not your enemy. Without me, you wouldn't exist! I'm your friend.'''
**Who: Doland (Malcolm Tierney)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Terror of the Vervoids|Terror of the Vervoids]] episode 4.
**Note: After being exposed by the Doctor as a murderer and saboteur, Doland tries to flee, but is cornered by the Vervoids. He unsuccessfully tries to reason with them, and they kill him.

*'''You must know who I am.'''&lt;br&gt;''[Lead Vervoid: Yes, Professor Lasky. We do.]''&lt;br&gt;'''Then you must also be aware that I mean you no harm.'''
**Who: Professor Lasky (Honor Blackman)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Terror of the Vervoids|Terror of the Vervoids]] episode 4.
**Note: In an attempt to buy time for the Doctor and Mel to escape, Lasky tries to reason with the Vervoids. Despite recognising her as their creator, the Vervoids kill her regardless.

====Seventh Doctor era====
*'''He may be hurt.'''
**Who: Sarn (Karen Clegg)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Time and the Rani|Time and the Rani]] episode 1.
**Note: After the disoriented Seventh Doctor stumbles while trying to escape the Rani's lab, Sarn says this line while trying to assist him. The Rani threatens to punish Sarn for her disobedience, causing her to flee outside the lab, where she dies when she triggers one of the Rani's globe traps.

*'''You've rarely questioned my actions before, this is not the time to begin.'''
**Who: Beyus (Donald Pickering)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Time and the Rani|Time and the Rani]] episode 4.
**Note: Said to his wife, Faroon, as he ushers her out of the control room of the Rani's lab. He dies when the Rani tries to execute her slaves, but instead causes the lab to explode thanks to the Doctor's and Beyus' sabotage.

*'''There was nothing wrong with it when I built it. Unless humanoid creatures have DAMAGED IT!'''
**Who: Kroagnon (Richard Briers)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Paradise Towers|Paradise Towers]] episode 4.
**Note: Kroagnon says this in response to the Doctor criticising his design work on a door, which unbeknownst to Kroagnon has been booby-trapped with a bomb. Pex then pushes Kroagnon through it, causing an explosion that kills them both,

*'''How do you propose to do that?'''
**Who: Kracauer (Tony Osoba)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Dragonfire (Doctor Who)|Dragonfire]] episode 2.
**Note: Said in response to Belazs suggesting that they kill Kane. Kracauer attempts to do so by raising the temperature in Kane's chamber beyond the point where he can survive, but it fails, and Kane kills him by grabbing his head, freezing him to death.

*'''Leave?'''
**Who: Belazs (Patricia Quinn)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Dragonfire (Doctor Who)|Dragonfire]] episode 2.
**Note: Her response to Kane's telling her that she's free to leave his employ. While this arouses her suspicions, it proves too late, and Kane kills her with his icy touch in retribution for the attempt on his life.

*'''No. No, it shall not be!'''
**Who: Kane (Edward Peel)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Dragonfire (Doctor Who)|Dragonfire]] episode 3.
**Note: Kane's reaction to discovering that his homeworld has been destroyed by a supernova. He then opens a nearby window, causing unfiltered sunlight to enter and burn him to death.

*'''Now! Run!'''
**Who: George Ratcliffe (George Sewell)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Remembrance of the Daleks|Remembrance of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: Ratcliffe says this line before trying to steal the Renegade Daleks' Time Controller, only to die at the hands of the girl who was enslaved to the Dalek Battle Computer.

*'''You stay there.''' &lt;br/&gt; ''[Ace: It might be the Doctor. Put the gun down, Mike. It's too late for that. Come on, Mike. Who are you gonna shoot with it anyway?]'' &lt;br/&gt; '''Just stay there!'''
**Who: Mike Smith (Dursley McLinden)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Remembrance of the Daleks|Remembrance of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: When Ace tries to retrieve the Daleks' Time Controller, Mike holds her at gunpoint. The girl rings his doorbell and Mike goes to answer it, only for her to kill him.

*'''Cannot compute! Unstable! UNSTABLE! FUNCTION IMPAIRED! FUNCTION IMPAIRED!'''
**Who: Renegade Supreme Dalek
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Remembrance of the Daleks|Remembrance of the Daleks]] episode 4.
**Note: After the destruction of Skaro, the Doctor confronts the Renegade Supreme Dalek and tells it that it no longer serves any purpose. Confused, the Dalek self-destructs.

*'''I have to bow, however reluctantly, to your logic. Which leaves me only one alternative!'''
**Who: The Kandyman (David John Pope)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Happiness Patrol|The Happiness Patrol]] episode 3.
**Note: Said by the Kandyman in response to being threatened with a hot poker by Ace, causing him to instead threaten the Doctor. The Doctor and Ace then escape into the pipes, where the Kandyman is dissolved by a flood of hot fondant surprise.

*'''I shall tell them of Gallifrey, tell them of the old times, the time of chaos.'''&lt;br/&gt; ''[Doctor: Be my guest.]''&lt;br/&gt;'''Your secrets-'''
**Who: Lady Peinforte (Fiona Walker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Silver Nemesis|Silver Nemesis]] episode 3.
**Note: Peinforte tries to blackmail the Doctor into handing control of the Nemesis statue to her by threatening to reveal his secrets to the Cybermen. Her attempt fails when the Cyber Leader tells her it has no interest in the Doctor's secrets, causing her to try to grab hold of the statue, only to be absorbed by it.

*'''Yeah, well, I'm coming down to the Psychic Circus tonight, and... uh, on the way...'''
**Who: Nord (Daniel Peacock)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 2
**Note: After entertaining the Gods of Ragnarok with his strength, Nord is ordered by the Ringmaster to tell them a joke. He fails miserably, and is executed on the spot.

*'''This is the most exciting day of my life. My dream come true. I'm standing in the ring of the Psychic Circus!'''
**Who: Whizzkid (Gian Sammarco)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 3
**Note: Upon his turn to entertain the Gods of Ragnarok, Whizzkid doesn't even attempt to put on an act and simply espouses his love of the Psychic Circus, which swiftly gets him executed.

*'''I don't know. I don't care. It's all destroyed, you know that. You were a wonderful clown, once. Funny. Inventive. But I'm not helping you any more, you see.'''&lt;br&gt;''[Chief Clown: Don't be a fool, Bellboy!]''&lt;br&gt;'''Come on! Do to me what you did to Flower Child! Come on! Come on! COME ON!'''
**Who: Bellboy (Christopher Guard)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 3
**Note: In order to buy time for the Doctor, Ace, and Deadbeat to escape, the Bellboy refuses to answer the Chief Clown's demand to know where they are, and then has his own robot creations kill him.

*'''No! No, listen-'''
**Who: Ringmaster (Ricco Ross)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 4
**Note: Last words before he and Morgana are executed by the Gods of Ragnarok as punishment for running out of acts.

*'''More acts are on the way! If you'll just-'''
**Who: Morgana (Deborah Manship)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 4
**Note: Last words before she and the Ringmaster are executed by the Gods of Ragnarok as punishment for running out of acts.

*'''Yes, and I shall get my reward. Last chance, Deadbeat. You really believe in all that talk of peace?'''
**Who: Chief Clown (Ian Reddington)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 4
**Note: After Deadbeat accuses the Chief Clown of selling the rest of the circus out to the Gods of Ragnarok, the Chief Clown responds with this, before trying to have his robot clowns kill him along with Ace and Mags. Ace then activates a giant robot created by the Bellboy, which fires upon and kills the Chief Clown and his robots.

*'''You know, when I was on the planet Periboea, I met someone who walked around when he was already dead. Personally, as an experience, I'd say it was very overrated!'''
**Who: Captain Cook (T.P. McKenna)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Greatest Show in the Galaxy|The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]] episode 4
**Note: Having already been killed by Mags in an earlier scene when he tried to make her kill the Doctor, Cook is re-animated by the Gods of Ragnarok to do their bidding, only for them to force him to jump to his death from a cliff when he fails to keep the amulet key to destroying them out of the Doctor's hands.

*'''Stay back, or I'll shoot!'''
**Who: Flight Lt. Lavel (Dorota Rae)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Battlefield (Doctor Who)|Battlefield]] episode 3.
**Note: Said to Morgaine, while trying to hold her at gunpoint. Morgaine reacts by hypnotising Lavel, then killing her by absorbing the contents of her mind, before disintegrating her body.

*'''Pitiful. Can this world do no better than you as their champion?'''
**Who: The Destroyer (Marek Anton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Battlefield (Doctor Who)|Battlefield]] episode 4.
**Note: Upon being confronted by Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart, the Destroyer scornfully dismisses him as a threat. The Brigadier replies &quot;Probably. I just do the best that I can.&quot; before shooting the Destroyer dead with silver bullets.

*'''You're no better than animals!'''
**Who: Reverend Matthews (John Nettleton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Ghost Light (Doctor Who)|Ghost Light]] episode 2.
**Note: Having been partly regressed into a gorilla in retribution for coming to denounce Josiah Samuel Smith's espousing evolution theory, Matthews says this to Smith before being killed, then stuffed and mounted in a display case.

*'''Ah, perhaps one of you can tell me where to find the Doctor? This place is like a madhouse!'''
**Who: Inspector Mackenzie (Frank Windsor)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Ghost Light (Ghost Light)|Ghost Light]] episode 3.
**Note: Said to Light and Nimrod, when he walks in on the two. Light reacts by killing Mackenzie and reducing him to a primordial soup.

*'''Oh, I am, dear. We both are.'''
**Who: Mrs. Pritchard (Sylvia Sims)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Ghost Light (Ghost Light)|Ghost Light]] episode 3.
**Note: Said to her daughter, as the two realise they have been used by Josiah Samuel Smith. They are then both killed by Light, who turns them to stone.

*'''Oh, mama. What have we done?'''
**Who: Gwendoline Pritchard (Katharine Schlesinger)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Ghost Light (Ghost Light)|Ghost Light]] episode 3.
**Note: Said to her mother, as the two realise they have been used by Josiah Samuel Smith. They are then both killed by Light, who turns them to stone.

*'''I will not change. I'll wake up soon. No change. Dead zero.'''
**Who: Light (John Hallam)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Ghost Light (Ghost Light)|Ghost Light]] episode 3.
**Note: After the Doctor persuades Light that evolution has rendered his catalogue of Earth's species useless and that he himself has evolved from his original form, Light decides he doesn't want to change any further and self-destructs.

*'''Are you going to use that gun? You know your problem, Captain Bates? You don't know who the enemy is. A traitor is someone who doesn't know who the enemy is.'''
**Who: Commander A.H. Millington (Alfred Lynch)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Curse of Fenric|The Curse of Fenric]] episode 4.
**Note: Millington says this line before he attempts to shoot Bates, only to be shot by Vershinin.

*'''Good hunting, sister.'''
**Who: Karra (Lisa Bowerman)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Survival (Doctor Who)|Survival]] episode 3.
**Note: Karra compliments Ace's hunting skills before she dies from her injuries caused by the Master. Karrra is the last character to die in the classic series.

===The Wilderness Years===
''to be added''

====Reeltime Pictures Productions====
''to be added''

====''P.R.O.B.E.''====
''to be added''

===''Doctor Who'' (2005)===
====Ninth Doctor era====
*'''It's true! Everything I read, all the stories! It's all true!'''
**Who: Clive (Mark Benton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Rose (Doctor Who)|Rose]]
**Note: Clive refers to all the stories he's read about the Doctor before he is blasted by an auton.

*'''Then stop wasting time, Time Lord.'''
**Who: Jabe (Yasmin Bannerman)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The End of the World (Doctor Who)|The End of the World]]
**Note: Jabe tells the Doctor to hurry and activate Platform one's shields before she burns to death.

*'''We're going to die!'''
**Who: The Moxx of Balhoon (Jimmy Vee)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The End of the World (Doctor Who)|The End of the World]]
**Note: The Moxx says this line before he is burned alive by the sun's rays.

*'''I'm too young!'''
**Who: Cassandra (Zoe Wanamaker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The End of the World (Doctor Who)|The End of the World]]
**Note: Cassandra says this line before the heat dries her out and she explodes. Character later returns in [[w: New Earth (Doctor Who)|New Earth]]

*'''Gwyneth, stop this. Listen to your master. This has gone far enough. Stop dabbling, child, and leave these things alone, I beg of you-'''
**Who: Gabriel Sneed (Alan David)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Unquiet Dead (Doctor Who)|The Unquiet Dead]]
**Note: Mr. Sneed says this line before one of the Gelth-possessed corpses kills him.

*'''Leave this place!'''
**Who: Gwyneth (Eve Myles)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Unquiet Dead (Doctor Who)|The Unquiet Dead]]
**Note: Gwyneth says this line to the Doctor and Rose before she sacrifices herself to stop the Gelth.

*'''Oh, boll-'''
**Who: Jocrassa Fel-Fotch Passameer-Day Slitheen
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:World War Three (Doctor Who)|World War Three]]

*'''What are you gonna do? Sucker me to death?'''
**Who: Simmons (Nigel Whitmey)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Dalek (Doctor Who episode)|Dalek]]
**Note: Simmons arrogantly mocks the Dalek with this line before it kills him by attaching its plunger to his face and suffocating him.

*'''Are you frightened, Rose Tyler?''' ''[Rose Tyler: Yeah.]'' '''So am I. Exterminate.'''
**Who: Dalek
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Dalek (Doctor Who episode)|Dalek]]
**Note: The Dalek says this line before it self-destructs.

*'''I kinda figured that!'''
**Who: Jack Harkness (John Barrowman)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Parting of the Ways |The Parting of the Ways]]
**Note: Exterminated by a Dalek, then brought back by Rose Tyler / the Bad Wolf.

*'''I will not die! I cannot die!'''
**Who: Dalek Emperor (Nicholas Briggs)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Parting of the Ways |The Parting of the Ways]]
**The Dalek Emperor says this line before he is destroyed by Rose Tyler / the Bad Wolf.

====Tenth Doctor era====
*'''With respect, sir. The human race is taking its first step towards the stars, but we are like children compared to you. Children who need help. Children who need compassion. I beg of you now, show that compassion.'''
**Who: Daniel Llewellyn (Daniel Evans)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: The Christmas Invasion|The Christmas Invasion]]''
**Note: Daniel Llewellyn says this line before the Sycorax Leader kills him with his whip.

*'''That man was your prisoner! Even your species must have articles of war, forbidding-'''
**Who: Major Blake (Chu Omambula)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: The Christmas Invasion|The Christmas Invasion]]''
**Note: Major Blake says this after the Sycorax Leader kills David Llewellyn with his whip, but before he can finish his sentence, the Sycorax Leader kills him too.

*'''I committed treason for you, but now my wife will remember me with honour!'''
**Who: Sir Robert (Derek Riddell)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: Tooth and Claw|Tooth and Claw]]''
**Note: Says this line before attempting to fight the werewolf so he can buy time for the Doctor and Rose to save Queen Victoria.

*'''Split up!'''
**Who: Ricky Smith (Noel Clarke)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: The Age of Steel|The Age of Steel]]''
**Note: Ricky says this along with his Prime Earth counterpart Mickey to elude Cyberman capture. Mickey makes it across a fence but before Ricky can do so, he is fatally electrocuted by a Cyberman. This leaves Mickey to continue the fight against Cybermen.

*'''Die you!'''
**Who: Mr. Crane
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: The Age of Steel|The Age of Steel]]''
**Note: Mr. Crane says this when betraying John Lumic by disabling his life-support systems keeping him alive. In retaliation, a Cyberman fries him.

*'''Help me!''' ''[Cyberman: You are in pain. We can remove pain forever.]'' '''No! Not yet! I'm not ready.''' ''[Cyberman: We will give you immortality.]'' '''I've told you. I will upgrade. Only with my last breath!''' ''[Cyberman: Then breathe no more.]'' ''[The Cyberman wheels Lumic away]'' '''No! No! I command you, no!'''
*'''NOOOOOOOOO!'''
**Who: John Lumic (Roger Lloyd Pack)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: The Age of Steel|The Age of Steel]]''
**Note: John Lumic pleads this after his henchman Crane cuts off his life-support keeping him alive in his wheelchair. He is taken to be cyberized into the Cyber Controller. For the second line, he says this realizing the Doctor and his party have ruined his schemes. In his new cyberized body, he gives chase to the Doctor's escaping party on one of his zeppelins, but Peter Tyler (from the Cybus Earth) says &quot;Jackie Tyler! THIS IS FOR HER!&quot; and he uses the Sonic Screwdriver to loosen the ladder and send Lumic falling to his death into the rising fires.

*'''We've got to. Before they kill everyone else. There's no choice, Doctor. It's got to be done.'''
**Who: Mrs. Moore/Angela Price (Helen Griffin)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]] [[w: The Age of Steel|The Age of Steel]]''
**Note: Mrs. Moore says this to deactivate the Emotion Inhibitors which will self-destruct everyone who has been cyberized as Cybermen and for the Doctor to make this difficult choice. However, another Cyberman electrocutes her before the two can proceed.

*'''Open door 40! Open door 40! OPEN DOOR 40! OPEN DOOR 40! OPEN DOOR 40!'''
**Who: Scooti Manista (MyAnna Buring)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Impossible Planet|The Impossible Planet]]
**Note: Scooti sees the Beast-possessed Toby Zed on the surface of the planet and then tries to escape through door 40, but then Toby psychically breaks the glass, causing Scooti to be sucked out into space. Her dead body is later seen drifting into the black hole.

*'''Well... if I might chose the manner of my departure, sir... lack of air seems more natural than... well... let's say... death by Ood. I'd appreciate it sir!''' ''[Zach: Godspeed, Mr. Jefferson]'' '''Thank you, sir.'''
**Who: Officer John Maynard Jefferson PKD (Danny Webb)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Satan Pit|The Satan Pit]]
**Note: John Jefferson says this knowing he's going to die by the possessed Ood and wants to suffocate instead since he is trapped in maintenance tunnel 8.1. The oxygen is cut off and he suffocates with his light going out. His death is logged by his captain as the officer died in the line of duty.

*'''My cane! You stupid man-- OH, NO!'''
**Who: The Abzorbaloff (Peter Kay)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Love &amp; Monsters|Love &amp; Monsters]]
**Note: The Abzorbaloff says this to Elton Pope, who has just broken the cane which generates his limitation field. This causes the Abzorbaloff to then collapse into a puddle of liquid, which is absorbed by the earth.

*'''Don't! I-I-I'll tell you everything you need! No! No! AAAAAHHHH!'''
**Who: Rajesh Singh (Raji James)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Doomsday (Doctor Who)|Doomsday]]
**Note: The Cult of Skaro use their manipulator arms to extract brainwaves from Rajesh Singh's mind, killing him in the process.

*'''Enjoy your victory, Judoon, because you're going to burn with me. BURN IN HELL!'''
**Who: Florence Finnigan (Anne Reid)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Smith and Jones|Smith and Jones]]
**Note: After being exposed as the Plasmavore, Florence Finnigan activates the Royal hope Hospital's MRI scanner in an attempt to destroy the side of the Earth facing the moon, then says this line to the Judoon before they shoot her with their laser blasters.

*''' Hold hard, Wanton Woman! I shall return, later.'''
**Who: Lynley (Chris Larkin)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Shakespeare Code|The Shakespeare Code]]
**Note: Says this line to Lilith, who takes a piece of his hair, which she uses to create a doll of him, which she places into a bucket of water, causing him to drown.

*'''No! Get off me! I did everything you asked me! No!'''
**Who: Mr. Diagoras (Eric Loren)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Daleks in Manhattan|Daleks in Manhattan]]
**Note: Says this line before Dalek Sec merges with him.

*'''No! I beg you, don't!'''
**Who: Dalek Sec
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Evolution of the Daleks|Evolution of the Daleks]]
**Note: Sec pleads for the Cult of Skaro to not kill the Doctor, then stands up in front of Dalek Thay's laser just as he fires it.

*'''I will feed soon.''' ''[The Doctor: I'm not gonna let that happen.]'' '''You've not been able to stop me so far.'''
**Who: Professor Richard Lazarus (Mark Gatiss)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Lazarus Experiment|The Lazarus Experiment]]
**Note: Says this before transforming into his mutated form. He chases Martha and Tish Jones up into a belltower, from which he ends up falling to his death.

*'''Korwin, you're sick.'''
**Who: Abi Lerner (Vinette Robinson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:42 (Doctor Who)|42]]
**Note: Says this line before she is incinerated by the sun-possessed Hal Korwin.

*'''I have till the rain stops.'''
**Who: Billy Shipton (Louis Mahoney)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Blink (Doctor Who)|Blink]]
**Note: After being sent back in time by the Weeping Angels, Billy tells Sally Sparrow to meet him in the hospital and soon passes away from old age.

*'''Saxon, what are you talking about?'''
**Who: President Arthur Winters (Colin Stinton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Sound of Drums (Doctor Who)|The Sound of Drums]]
**Note: The Master orders the Toclafane to kill President Winters.

*'''All the same, Rickston's right. Me and Foon should--'''
**Who: Morvin Van Hoff (Clive Rowe)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Voyage of the Damned (Doctor Who)|Voyage of the Damned]]
**Note: Says this line before he falls into the Titanic's storm drive engine.

*'''Pretty girl.'''
**Who: Bannakaffalata (Jimmy Vee)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Voyage of the Damned (Doctor Who)|Voyage of the Damned]]
**Note: After unleashing his EMP to destroy the Heavenly Host, Bannakaffalata says this line to Astrid Peth before he dies due to his energy running out.

*'''Not so clever now, Doctor. A shame we couldn't work together. You're rather good. All that banter yet not a word wasted. Time for me to retire. The Titanic is falling. The sky will burn. Let the Christmas inferno commence. Oh! Oh, Host! kill him.'''
**Who: Max Capricorn (George Costigan)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Voyage of the Damned (Doctor Who)|Voyage of the Damned]]
**Note: Max Capricorn gloats this having shut off the spaceship Titanic's engines so as to destroy Earth in the Christmas Inferno. Before the Host can execute the Doctor, Astrid Peth heroically sacrifices herself with a forklift to kill both herself and her former boss.

*'''I'm far more than that. I'm nanny, to all these children.'''
**Who: Cofelia a.k.a. Ms. Foster (Sarah Lancashire)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Partners in Crime (Doctor Who)|Partners in Crime]]
**Note: Ms Foster/Cofelia barbs this saying she is the nanny for the Adipose she conceived illegally through humans on Earth. Since the crime has been found out, the Doctor reminds, &quot;Exactly! Mom and dad have got the kids now, they don't need the nanny anymore!&quot; Sure enough, the levitation beam from the Adipose ship is deactivated, sending Cofelia falling to her death on the pavement below.

*'''Just shoot them! Shoot to kill!'''
**Who: Solana Mercurio (Ayesha Dharker)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Planet of the Ood|Planet of the Ood]]
**Note: Orders the guards to shoot the Ood before she is killed by one of them.

*'''Come back! Let me out of here!'''
**Who: Kess (Roger Griffiths)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Planet of the Ood|Planet of the Ood]]
**Note: Kess demands the Ood to release him before he is exposed to the gas that he was going to use to kill them.

*'''Sontar HA!'''
**Who: Luke Rattigan (Ryan Sampson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Poison Sky|The Poison Sky]]
**Note: Luke says this this after transporting the Doctor off the Sontaran flagship and uses the Doctor's atmospheric converter bomb to kill both himself and the Sontarans on board.

*'''Look at their hands. They're clean.'''
**Who: Cline's companion
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[wikipedia:The_Doctor's_Daughter|The Doctor's Daughter]]
**Note:

*'''Oh, no!'''
**Who: Gerald Peach (Ian Barritt)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Unicorn and the Wasp|The Unicorn and the Wasp]]
**Note: Says this line before he is killed by a blow to the head with a lead pipe.

*'''The poor... little... child...'''
**Who: Chandrakala (Leena Dhingra)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Unicorn and the Wasp|The Unicorn and the Wasp]]
**Note: Killed when the Vespiform crushes her with a gargoyle.

*'''What's to stop me killing you all?!'''
**Who: Reverend Golighty / The Vespiform (Tom Goodman-Hill)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Unicorn and the Wasp|The Unicorn and the Wasp]]
**Note: Tricked into drowning himself.

*'''Er, this might be important, actually.'''
**Who: Miss Evangelista
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Silence in the Library|Silence in the Library]]
**Note: Uploaded into the Library shortly after.

*'''One, two, three, four, five, six!'''
**Who: Hostess (Rakie Ayola)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Midnight (Doctor Who)|Midnight]]
**Note: Throws both herself and the possessed Sky Silvestry out of the shuttle bus's door

*'''Harriet Jones, former Prime Minister.''' ''[Dalek: Yes. We know who you are.]'' '''Oh, you know nothing of any human. And that will be your downfall.'''
**Who: Harriet Jones (Penelope Wilton)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Stolen Earth|The Stolen Earth]]
**Note: Says these lines when three Daleks break into her house and then kill her.

*'''I'm going home, mate!'''
**Who: Bus Driver (Keith Parry)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Planet of the Dead|Planet of the Dead]]
**Note: Runs into the wormhole connecting San Helios to Earth, only to be incinerated and reduced to a skeleton.

*'''The very first garden off Earth. Everything brand new. Eden. That's what we should have called this place.'''
**Who: Andy Stone (Alan Ruscoe)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Waters of Mars|The Waters of Mars]]
**Note: After taking a bite of a carrot that he had washed with Bowie Base One's water supply, Andy Stone is infected by the Flood.

*'''Sarah! God help us! There's this man!'''
**Who: Tommo (Pete Lee-Wilson)
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The End of Time|The End of Time]]
**Note: Says this line to Sarah, the burger seller, only to find that she has been eaten to the bone by the Master, who then proceeds to devour both him and Ginger.

====Eleventh Doctor era====
*'''Well, I'm hardly going to smell of cheese and biscuits.'''
**Who: Francesco
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Vampires of Venice|The Vampires of Venice]]
**Note: Says this line before Amy kills him by reflecting sunlight onto him using a mirror.

*'''We are Venetians!'''
**Who: Guido
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Vampires of Venice|The Vampires of Venice]]
**Note: Says this line before causing an explosion that destroys himself and the Saturnyne converts.

*'''Look after our baby.'''
*'''Doctor, the Dream Lord conceded. This isn't a dream.'''
**Who: Rory Williams
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Amy's Choice (Doctor Who)|Amy's Choice]]
**Note: Killed in his own dream world by one of the aliens. Later killed in the Doctor's dream world when the Doctor blows up the TARDIS.

*'''I love Rory, and I never told him. But now he's gone.'''
*'''How do you know that?'''
**Who: Amy Pond
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Amy's Choice (Doctor Who)|Amy's Choice]]
**Note: Killed in Rory's dream world when she drives her car into the side of her house. Later killed in the Doctor's dream world when the Doctor blows up the TARDIS.

*'''You're so beautiful. I'm sorry...'''
**Who: Rory Williams
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Cold Blood (Doctor Who)|Cold Blood]]
**Note: Shot by a Silurian, erased from the timeline.

*'''I'm sorry, my love.'''
**Who: River Song
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Pandorica Opens|The Pandorica Opens]]
**Note: Trapped in a time loop by the exploding TARDIS to keep her alive. Eventually rescued by the [[Eleventh Doctor]].

*'''There it is. You remember. This is you and you are staying.'''
**Who: Amy Pond
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Pandorica Opens|The Pandorica Opens]]
**Note: Shot by an Auton duplicate of Rory Williams. Eventually revived thanks to the Pandorica.

*'''How can he do that? Is he magic?'''
**Who: Amelia Pond 
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Big Bang (Doctor Who)|The Big Bang]]
**Note: Last words said prior to the universe rebooting.

*'''It's all right. It's quite all right. I'm dying. But I can fix that. It's easy, really. See?'''
**Who: Melody Pond
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Day of the Moon|Day of the Moon]]
**Note: Said prior to regenerating into Mels.

*'''Rats was all I could hear.'''
*'''I know you can do this. Of course, if you muck it up, I'm going to be really cross. And dead.'''
**Who: Rory Williams
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Curse of the Black Spot|The Curse of the Black Spot]]
**Note: 

*'''Shut up, Dad! I'm focusing on a dress size!'''
**Who: Mels
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Let's Kill Hitler|Let's Kill Hitler]]
**Note: Shot by Hitler, then regenerates into River Song

*'''Show me Earth. Show me home. Did I ever tell you about this boy I met there? He pretended to be in a band...'''
**Who: Amy-2
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Girl Who Waited|The Girl Who Waited]]
**Note: Killed by Handbots, erased from the timeline.

*'''Changing the future! It's called marriage...'''
*'''Raggedy Man... Goodbye!'''
*'''Tell her this is the story of Amelia Pond. And this is how it ends...'''
**Who: Amy Pond
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Angels Take Manhattan|The Angels Take Manhattan]]
**Note: Jumps off a building with Rory. Later follows Rory into the past via a Weeping Angel and writes her last words to the Doctor in the epilogue of her book.

*'''Run, you clever boy, and remember.'''
**Who: Oswin Oswald
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Asylum of the Daleks|The Asylum of the Daleks]]
**Note: Killed when the Asylum explodes.

*'''Run, you clever boy, and remember...'''
**Who: Clara Oswin Oswald
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Snowmen (Doctor Who)|The Snowmen]]
**Note: Dies due to internal injuries after falling off the Doctor's cloud.

*'''Run, you clever boy, and remember me.'''
**Who: Clara Oswald
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Name of the Doctor|The Name of the Doctor]]
**Note: Fades away after saying goodbye to the Doctor.

*'''Goodbye, Sweetie.'''
**Who: River Song's Data Ghost
**Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Name of the Doctor|The Name of the Doctor]]
**Note: Fades away after saying goodbye to the Doctor.

*'''Then you're gonna die right here. Best news all day!'''
** Who: Cass
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Night of the Doctor|The Night of the Doctor]]
** Note: Said to the [[Eighth Doctor]] but counted in the Eleventh Doctor's era due to being broadcast during the 50th Anniversary celebrations. Killed when her ship crashes into Karn, which also briefly kills the Eighth Doctor.

*'''The Doctor... is... escaping! What... are... these words? Explain! Explain!'''
** Who: Dalek Soldier
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Day of the Doctor|The Day of the Doctor]]
** Note: Shot and killed by a Time Lord soldier.

*'''I understand. Live for me, my darling. We shall be together again!'''
** Who: Queen Elizabeth's Zygon Duplicate
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Day of the Doctor|The Day of the Doctor]]
** Note: Stabbed by the real Elizabeth offscreen.

*'''I don't know, I can't see it.'''
** Who: Skarr's aide
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Time of the Doctor|The Time of the Doctor]]
** Note: Said in response to their invisibility cloak being exposed. Blown up by the Church of the Papal Mainframe

*'''Well. It looks invisible to me.'''
** Who: Commander Skarr
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Time of the Doctor|The Time of the Doctor]]
** Note: Said in response to their invisibility cloak being exposed. Blown up by the Church of the Papal Mainframe

*'''Signal verified.'''
** Who: Wooden Cyberman
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Time of the Doctor|The Time of the Doctor]]
** Note: Tricked into self-immolation

*'''Exterminate! Exterminate the Doctor'''
** Who: Supreme Dalek
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Time of the Doctor|The Time of the Doctor]]
** Note: Incinerated by the Doctor's regeneration energy

====Twelfth Doctor era====
*'''Bow down before your new king, you Prince of knaves.'''
** Who: Sheriff of Nottingham (Ben Miller)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Robot of Sherwood|Robot of Sherwood]]
** Note: Character's last words before he is pushed into a vat of molten gold by Robin Hood.

*'''Oh no! Get it off! Get it off!'''
** Who: Mrs. Pitt (Janet Henfrey)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Mummy on the Orient Express|Mummy on the Orient Express]]
** Note: Killed by the Foretold, with her death later being diagnosed as a heart attack.

*'''To keep an eye on you, idiot. So, don't die.'''
** Who: Alice O'Donnell (Morven Christie)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Before the Flood (Doctor Who)|Before the Flood]]
** Note: Dies after being fatally injured by the Fisher King.

*'''Spare me, my brothers!'''
** Who: Leandro (Ariyon Bakare)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Woman Who Lived|The Woman Who Lived]]''

*'''Okay, whatever that is, that is not meant to happen.'''
** Who: Douglas (Tony Gardner)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Pyramid at the End of the World|The Pyramid at the End of the World]]''
** Note: Character's last spoken line before he is killed by the bacteria that he has unwittingly created.

*'''Gentlemen! It's been a privilege, however brief, to command you, but all good things come to an end.'''
** Who: Neville Catchlove (Ferdinand Kingsley)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:Empress of Mars|Empress of Mars]]
** Note: Says this line before trying to escape with Iraxxa as his hostage, only for Colonel Godsacre to shoot him dead.

====Thirteenth Doctor era====
*'''Where's my sister?'''
** Who: Rahul (Amit Shah)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Woman Who Fell To Earth|The Woman Who Fell To Earth]]
** Note: Asks this question to Tzim-Sha before the latter kills him.

*'''Promise me... you won't be scared...''' ''[Graham: What do you mean?]'' '''Without me.'''
** Who: Grace O'Brien (Sharon D. Clarke)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Woman Who Fell To Earth|The Woman Who Fell To Earth]]
** Note: Dies after falling off a crane while destroying Tzim-Sha's gathering coil.

*'''This must be some sort of joke!''' ''[Dalek: Daleks do not joke!]'' '''And I do not surrender!'''
** Who: Jo Patterson (Harriet Walter)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revolution of the Daleks|Revolution of the Daleks]]
** Note: Killed by the Daleks after they have taken over the Defence Drones.

*'''I can be purified. My genetics can be modified.'''
** Who: Reconnaissance Dalek
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Revolution of the Daleks|Revolution of the Daleks]]
** Note: Killed by the Death Squad Daleks.

*'''Please don't tell us what to do. It's just a perfectly normal...''' ''[The angel grabs his coat]'' '''How is that...?'''
** Who: Gerald (Vincent Brimble)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Village of the Angels|Village of the Angels]]
** Note: Yaz, Dan and Peggy try to warn Gerald and his wife, Jean, to not walk past one of the Weeping Angels, but they ignore their warnings and walk in front of the Weeping Angel, allowing it to grab Gerald's coat. When Gerald and Jean try to pull his coat away, they both touch the angel and turn to stone before crumbling into dust.

*'''You don't belong here.'''
** Who: Tecteun (Barbara Flynn)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: Survivors of the Flux|Survivors of the Flux]]
** Note: Killed by Swarm.

*'''What an awfully big adventure.'''
** Who: Professor Eustacius Jericho (Kevin McNally)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Vanquishers|The Vanquishers]]
** Note: Killed by the Flux

*'''Ascension.'''
** Who: Azure (Rochenda Sandall)
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w:The Vanquishers|The Vanquishers]]

====Fourteenth Doctor era====
*'''Sergeant Zogroth regrets retirement from active duty...'''
** Who: Sergeant Zogroth
** Source: ''[[Doctor Who]]'' [[w: The Star Beast (Doctor Who episode)|The Star Beast]]
** Note: Killed by the Meep.

====Fifteenth Doctor era====
*'''Sunlight! I am light! The light of creation... I am everything... and I am nothing. Goodbye.
** Who: Lux Imperator
** Source: Lux
** Note: As the God of Light is hit by sunlight, he absorbs so much light that his body is spread too thin and he disappears completely.

===''Torchwood''===
''to be added''

===''The Sarah Jane Adventures''===
*'''I'll go back. I'll kill her.'''
** Who: Davey (Jamie Davis)
** Source: ''[[The Sarah Jane Adventures]]'' [[w: Invasion of the Bane|Invasion of the Bane]]
** Note: After failing to kill Sarah Jane Smith, Davey begs Mrs Wormwood for another chance to defeat her, but he is fed to the Bane Mother.

*'''He's my son. Please, let him live.'''
** Who: Kist Magg Thek Lutiven-Day Slitheen (Ian Midlane)
** Source: ''[[The Sarah Jane Adventures]]'' [[w: Revenge of the Slitheen|Revenge of the Slitheen]]
** Note: Kist and his son Korst are trapped by a sealing door about to be electrocuted. Kist asks Sarah Jane Smith to let his son live, to which Sarah obliges by allowing Korst to teleport away, leaving Kist to die.

*'''My stomach! It's- Argh! ARGH!'''
** Who: Leef Apple Glyn Slitheen-Blathereen (Miriam Margolyes)
** Source: ''[[The Sarah Jane Adventures]]'' [[w: The Gift (The Sarah Jane Adventures)|The Gift]]
** Note: Sarah Jane Smith uses the sound of an alarm bell to destroy the Rakweed in Leef's stomach, releasing a lot of methane into her body that destroys her.

===''K-9''===
''to be added''

===''Class''===
''to be added''

==Comics==
===TV Comic comics===
''to be added''

===''Doctor Who Magazine'' comics ===
''to be added''

===''Doctor Who Adventures'' comics===
''to be added''

===IDW Publishing comics===
''to be added''

===Titan Publishing Group comics===
''to be added''

==Prose==
===Target novelisations===
''to be added''

===''Virgin New Adventures''===
''to be added''

===''Virgin Missing Adventures''===
''to be added''

===''BBC Past Doctor Adventures''===
''to be added''

===''BBC Eighth Doctor Adventures''===
''to be added''

===Short Trips===
''to be added''

===''BBC New Series Adventures''===
''to be added''

===Quick Reads===
''to be added''

===BBC Books Anthologies===
''to be added''

==Video Games==
''to be added''

==Audios==
===BBC AudioGO Dramas===
''to be added''

===Big Finish Productions===
* '''No, no, I'm here to save-Agh! I'm here to sa-AAAAGGGHH!'''
** Who: Alex Marlowe (Nigel Planer)
**Source: &quot;Hothouse&quot;

* '''Not likely, mate. You come here, you mess up my planet, you mess up my life, and now you say you're going to kill the best bloke I've ever met. And you think I'm just gonna what, bleedin' surrender?! Well all I can say is you don't know me. You don't know me at all, and in case you wanted to know who it was that blew you to pieces; the name is Lucie Miller! You got that? Lucie bleedin' Miller!'''
** Who: Lucie Miller (Sheridan Smith)
** Source: &quot;To the Death&quot;

* '''Oh well. It was good to remember what hope felt like.'''
** Who: Hoster (David Dobson)
** Source: &quot;Daleks Victorious&quot;

==Webcasts==
''to be added''

==Others==
''to be added''

[[Category:Doctor Who|Last words]]
[[Category:Fictional last words|Doctor Who]]</text>
      <sha1>2zqty4t8ktn4vxnm91opyk96wn2h2rm</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Generator Rex</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>125683</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965251</id>
      <parentid>3964803</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:21:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35623-41</username>
        <id>3343351</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Haunted */</comment>
      <origin>3965251</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="518855" sha1="kg6eabpl8wrw6r8wtdo3mz40v5ux8qg" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
This is a list of quotes from the popular, yet cancelled animated television series ''[[w:Generator Rex|Generator Rex]]''. A video game and several chapter books were produced. 

The series supposedly &quot;[[w: cliffhanger|concluded]]&quot; with its third season, despite leaving many questions unanswered and crucial elements unresolved ''before'' the two-part Season 3 finale, ''Endgame''.
==Season One (2010-2011)==
===The Day That Everything Changed===
:'''Bobo''': Wheels or wings?
:'''Rex''': Wheels, I wanna tear something up.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Agent Six''': He just needs more training control of those emotions.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': He's a teenager that's like asking you to get a different color suit!
===String Theory===
:'''Biowulf:''' Master, we had a situation at the safe house. Meecham is cured. It was Rex.
:(''The camera zooms in on Van Kleiss whose expressive vindictive indeed'')
===Beyond the Sea===
:''Note'': Rex meets his [[w:love interest|love interest]] and sweetheart, Circe.
:────────────────────
:'''Rex''': Don't know what you're 24/7 is, but mine is 10% OH YEAH! And 90% uhh.
:────────────────────
:'''Rex:''' Outta the way!
:'''Circe:''' Uh!
:(''Rex and Circe both crash to the ground'')
:'''Rex:''' Are you okay? Did you see that awesome save?
: '''Circe:''' Sorry, I was busy trying not to get tackled by some nitwit.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah? How that work out for you? And who still uses the word &quot;nitwit&quot;? I'm Rex.
: '''Circe:''' I'm leaving.
: '''Rex:''' Hey, wait!
: '''Noah:''' Rex, you're up.
: ────────────────────
: '''Six:''' What about the new tracker?
: '''Doctor Holdiay:''' His nanites unbuilt it, just like all the other ones we tried sneaking in him. We're still receiving his biometric readings though. It's strange, they're all over the place. It's almost like his emotions are...shorting out.
: '''Six:''' He took an unusual interest in Calan's briefing about equatorial upticks.
: '''Doctor Holiday:''' And that's important because?
: '''Six:''' Rex has been acting stir-crazy and I heard the monkey mention something about spring break. ''[to workers]'' Scan all resort areas for his bio signature.
: ────────────────────
: '''Noah:''' Oh, you have got it all messed up. Falling for some girl? We're supposed to get them to dig us. Not the other way around.
: '''Rex:''' I don't know. There was something different about her. She's...right there. Later.
: ────────────────────
: '''Rex:''' Hey, wait up!
: '''Circe:''' Why are you following me?!
: '''Rex:''' Uh, I don't know exactly.
: '''Circe:''' Do you think I'm playing?!
: '''Rex:''' Well, if you are I'm down for another game. I thought maybe we could hang out. It is spring break, you know. Fun.
: '''Circe:''' I'm with my family. We're not really for fun.
: '''Rex:''' What! Who comes to the beach and doesn't have fun?
: (''Circe raises her hand'')
: '''Rex:''' Don't you think that's a little messed up?
: '''Circe:''' Maybe a little.
: '''Rex:''' So?
: '''Circe:''' I'm Circe.
: ────────────────────
: '''Rex:''' Hold on! 
: '''Circe:''' Woooo!
: '''Rex:''' Definitely better than my suggestion.
: '''Circe:''' Hunting for seashells is fun.
: (''both laugh'')
: '''Beach Guy:''' You two skid-marts up for a race to the beach?
: '''Circe:''' Well, if you drive as badly as for play volleyball, we could probably walk there and win. You're on, meathead.
: (''guy drives off in anger)''
: '''Rex:''' So you were watching me play.
: '''Circe:''' Maybe a little.
: '''Rex:''' sure you wanna do this?
: '''Circe:''' Thrill me.
: '''Beach Guy:''' Hahahaha! Wooo!
: '''Circe:''' C'mom Rex, faster!
: ────────────────────
: '''Biowulf:''' Explain.
: '''Circe:''' Relax. I was covering. Every day when I'm at the end of that jet i when I could hanging out with the other kids, it's starting to look suspicious.
: '''Biowulf:''' You're not here for vacation, girl! You're here to prove yourself to Van Kleiss. And I'm starting to doubt you can.
: '''Circe:''' I told you. It's a done deal.
: (''The shadow of her tubular sonic mouth is seen'')
: ────────────────────
: '''Noah:''' So what's on today's spring break agenda? Jet skiing, hiking?
: '''Bobo:''' Eating our weight in crab legs?
: '''Rex:''' I figured we'd just chill. Let's just see who...uhh I mean what shows up.
: ''(siren-like call)''
: '''Rex:''' Did you hear that?
: '''Noah:''' Sorry, enchiladas.
: '''Rex:''' No, that! You seriously didn't hear that?
: ────────────────────
: '''Rex:''' Circe?
: '''Circe:''' You really shouldn't be here right now.
: '''Rex:''' I heard something coming from over here.
: '''Circe:''' I'm serious, Rex. It's not safe.
: '''Rex:''' What you think some sort of roguewave is gonna knock off and- Oh.
: '''Circe:''' There you are. Get out of here, Rex!
: '''Rex:''' Circe!! What are you doing!?
: '''Circe:''' Me!? What are you doing!?
: '''Rex:''' Right now, my job. Okay! Don't freak out.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' You're an E.V.O.?
: '''Rex:''' You catch on fast.
: '''Circe:''' Takes one to know one. 
: (''Shows Rex her fleshly sonic mouth'')
: '''Rex:''' No way.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' Cover your ears!
: '''Rex:''' What!?
: '''Circe:''' Your ears! Cover them!
: (''Projects her tubular, fleshy mouth and emits strong hypersonic bursts'')
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' Did I hurt you?
: '''Rex:''' Yeah. It was awesome. You were the one making that sound.
: '''Circe:''' I'm glad you're OK, but I'm in serious trouble. I have to go deal with it.
: '''Rex:''' Why are in trouble? Is it because of that E.V.O.? Let me help you.
: '''Circe''': No. I have to do this by myself.
:(''Rex takes a hold of her hand'')
: '''Rex:''' Meet me later.
: '''Circe:''' Rex... (''Looks away sadly'')
: '''Rex:''' I've never met anyone like you...like me. It'd be nice to talk to an E.V.O. who's not, you know, trying to kill me. Nine O'clock? 
: '''Circe:''' I'll try.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' I just wanted to have some fun, see if I could jog my memory, feel...normal.
:'''Six:''' Your &quot;normal&quot; is different, Rex.
:(''Rex hears Circe's irresistibly hypnotic melody'')
:'''Rex:''' It's her, Six. Just let me deal with this, OK? Alone.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' You're only here because you heard my [[w:siren |call]]. That's what I do. I'm like a big E.V.O. magnet.
: '''Rex:''' I came because I thought we had a connection. And what are you calling? Nothing's out there but big, ugly sea monsters.
: '''Circe:''' It's them! You have to go! Rex, please! I don't want them to see you with me!
: '''Rex:''' Who? Your parents?
: '''Circe:''' They're not my parents. They're...
: '''Rex:''' The Pack!? Van Kleiss' guys!? Your with ''them''!?
: '''Circe:''' Yeah. I'm with them. 
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Biowulf:''' We're running out patience with you, Circe! You have one last chance! Summon the E.V.O.! Finish the job!!
: '''Circe:''' Don't you think I've been trying? Every day for the last week? Sometimes these things take time.
: '''Rex:''' It is just me or do you use your powers to kill all the guys you meet? You're letting her go, now!
: '''Biowulf (laughs)''': So ''this'' is who you been wasting your time with. She's on her own free will, Rex.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' Circe?
: '''Circe:''' You have to leave me alone, Rex!! ''Please!''
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Six:''' Go after her. I mean it.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' The Pack!? Are you serious!?
: '''Circe:''' To the rest of the world I'm a freak! Not to them!
: '''Rex:''' You're not a freak to me! What about that?
: '''Circe:''' What about it!? Spring break is fun, but we can't live there, Rex. The real world...
: '''Rex:''' In the real world, I work for Providence. You could come with me. Could you cut out that noise for a second!?
: '''Circe:''' No, I can't! I'm running out of time! Most people on this planet what E.V.O.s gone, ''including'' Providence! With Van Kleiss, I have a purpose; a home. You don't what that means to me.
: '''Rex:''' Actually, I think I might.
: '''Circe:''' So what are going to do?
: '''Rex:''' How about fight that big, ugly sea monster again?
: '''Circe:''' Finally! It's what I came here to do.
: '''Rex:''' You've been calling that thing, haven't you?
: '''Circe:''' It's my initiation into the Pack. I was brought here to capture it.
: '''Rex:''' By yourself!? The two of us could barely take it on! There's a resort here; innocent people! Send it back!
: '''Circe:''' That's not an option, Rex. Van Kleiss was very specific.
: '''Rex:''' Then I'm helping you.
: '''Circe:''' That's not an option either!! 
: (''Blasts him with her hypersonic waves'')
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' If I do this myself, I'll have a life! If I don't, Van Kleiss won't be happy. And you've seen what he does when he's not happy.
: '''Rex:''' If I don't help you, he won't even get the chance!
: '''Circe:''' Give me some credit, Rex! I'm not as helpless as you think!
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' I don't care whose side your on, Circe. I don't want to see you die today. Can we at least agree on that?
: '''Circe:''' You have no idea what I'm in for, Rex. But you're right. I can't do this by myself.
: '''Rex:''' You're not as helpless as you think.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe''' (''relieved'')''':''' Rex, you stopped it.
: '''Rex:''' We make a good team, huh?
: '''Circe:''' Yeah, we sure do. 
: (''She and Rex lean in closer for a passionate kiss, but are interrupted by Biowulf'')
: '''Biowulf:''' This trial was for you alone. Van Kleiss will not be pleased.
: '''Rex:''' Forget them, Circe. Come with me. Providence could use you.
: '''Circe:''' That's just not my life, Rex. I'm sorry. I did have fun.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Van Kleiss:''' We had high hopes for your abilities, Circe. Failure leaves its mark on yet another pretty face.
: '''Circe:''' I'm not afraid.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Of course not. You're a survivor, like all of us. I understand you made a friend during your trial. I'm pleased. Rex is very important to me, Circe, which makes you very important to me as well. Welcome to the Pack.
: (''Circe looks slightly worried, which clearly indicates that she does have real feelings for Rex'')

===Lockdown===
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Holiday:''' Rex, stop!!
:'''Rex:''' Give me one good reason!
:'''Holiday:''' Because, Rex...that's my sister.
:'''Rex:''' Can I...help?
:'''Holiday:''' She's an incurable.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Six:''' Restrain it. Carefully.
:'''Holiday:''' Thank you.

===The Architect===
:'''Six''': Still no sign of the kid?
:'''Holiday''': Not since we lost his biometric readings five days ago.
:'''Six''': Was Noah any help?
:'''Holiday''': Says he doesn't know where he is either. What is it going to take for Providence to realize that he needs a home, not just a room and a job? We've been pushing him away.
:'''Rex''': I build machines and cure EVOs-- the only one in the world who can. Just one cure for that kind of pressure-- road trip. But that doesn't mean &quot;vacation&quot;.
:'''Build worker''': Whoa!
:'''Maxwell''': What in the world is that?!
:'''Build worker:''' Oh, no!
:''[Both screaming]''
:'''Jacob''': Get away from that cable! Unh!
:''[Kate gasps]''
:'''Maxwell''': Hey!
:'''Jacob''': Agh!
:'''Kate''': Jacob!
:'''Rex''': Nope. A hero's work is never done. You okay?
:'''Jacob''': What... are you?
:'''Rex''': Here to help.
:'''Jacob''': We've got to get that cable back underground. We've been compromised.
:'''Kate''': But, Jacob, the EVOs--
:'''Jacob''': We don't have a choice. Everything we've worked for That boy is here for a reason.
:'''Rex''': Hey! Pay attention!
:'''Providence Agent''':  We have a hit in sector 15.
:'''Six''': Anyone in the area?
:'''Providence Agent''': I show one patrol in the vicinity. Signaling to intercept. Roger that. We're on our way.
:'''Rex''': Agh! You want a ride? Vamanos!
:'''Jacob''': You can control your nanites?
:'''Rex''': People usually start with &quot;thanks,&quot; but yeah.
:'''Jacob''': You see? This is exactly what the Architect can help us achieve... harmony with the nanites. This boy... sorry... young man Is a miracle.
:'''Rex''': I'm not a miracle. I'm just Rex.
:'''Jacob''': Well, Rex, you're a blessing to us for what you did here and for showing us that all our work isn't in vain.
:'''Rex''': Like imaginary work?
:'''Jacob''': Follow us.
:'''Providence Agent''': Confirming coordinates. We've lost the EVO signal. Did you take it out? Negative. There's nothing here. Must be another anomalous reading. You can return to post.
:'''Rex''': This is awesome! A hidden village. And nobody knows you're out here? Not even Providence?
:'''Jacob''': Especially not Providence.
:'''Rex''': Really? really. Pshh! Looks like you get pretty good cellphone reception.
:'''Jacob''': That tower is gonna change the world, Rex. I'm sure you have a lot of questions, but I have one for You. Are you hungry?
:'''Rex''': Mmm! Mmm!
:'''Caleb''': My dad said you fought all those EVOs all by yourself. Were you scared? Didn't your dad tell you to stay away from EVOs?
:'''Kate''': Caleb, let him eat. We don't get many visitors.
:'''Rex''': Mmm! Mmm! What is this?
:'''Caleb''': Didn't your mom ever make you meatloaf and mashed potatoes?
:'''Rex''': I don't -- I don't know.
:'''Kate''': It took me a month and a half to program in the perfect lump-to-mash ratio of the potatoes-- 7.2%!
:'''Jacob''': We ate potatoes until they were coming out of our ears.
:'''Rex''': I don't see any potatoes in there.
:'''Caleb''': They didn't really come out of our ears.
:'''Rex''': I could eat these every day.
:'''Rex''': Mmm!
:'''Caleb''': We have them every friday.
:'''Rex''': Then I might just have to stick around until next friday.
:'''Kate''': Help yourself to seconds.
:'''Jacob''': Or thirds.
:'''Rex''': Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
:'''Bobo''': Hmm?
:'''Six''': You might think you're doing Rex a favor by covering for him.
:'''Bobo''': Get lost. I don't know what you're talkin' about.
:'''Six''': Rex is angry with us. He has every right to be. But that means nothing to White Knight. And he doesn't have the patience we do.
:'''Bobo''': Nice try. White won't lay a finger on him. He's too important.
:'''Six''': You, however, are somewhat expendable.
:'''Bobo''': All right, all right. You made your point.
:'''Rex''': I've never seen tech like this... not even at Providence.
:'''Jacob''': The Architect has some pretty big ideas. We just make them happen. He'd be very interested to meet you, Rex.
:'''Rex''': So what exactly are You doing way out here?
:'''Jacob''': Engineers like us weren't very popular after the nanite event. When we met the Architect, he offered us the opportunity to make up for that... to do amazing things. Someday, we'll be able to share This with the world. And then there's this. The Architect has actually discovered a way to communicate with the nanites.
:'''Rex''': Are you serious?
:'''Jacob''': The possibilities... We could finally live in harmony... maybe even have them help us.
:'''Rex''': Then why hide it? The rest of the world would want to know about this stuff.
:'''Jacob''': The Architect is something of a perfectionist. Says the world will know as soon as it comes online.
:'''Maxwell''': Stinkin' module!
:'''Jacob''': Is there a problem, Maxwell?
:'''Maxwell''': No matter what I try, I just can't get the interlock servo to engage.
:'''Rex''': There.
:'''Jacob''': That could have taken us weeks to figure out, and you did it in seconds.
:'''Rex''': Eh, no biggie.
:'''Jacob''': You really are amazing, Rex. We're so happy to have you with us.
:'''The Architect''': Jacob.
:'''Jacob''': I was just talking to Rex about you. The Architect.
:'''Rex''': How's it going?
:'''The Architect''': The power-linkage team is falling behind. We cannot keep having these delays.
:'''Jacob''': I'll check in with them.
:'''Rex''': Wow. Friendly.
:'''Jacob''': I like to think he's smiling on the inside.
:'''Rex''': Yeah. I know a guy like that.
:'''The Architect''': The visitor could be a problem. Do you wish to have him removed?
:'''Zag-RS''': His abilities could advance our progress considerably. And in a matter of days all humans will be gone, including this one: Rex.
:'''Six''': I'm at the location the monkey gave me.
:'''Holiday''': Well? Is Rex there?
:'''Six''': Apparently not. Tell the monkey I want to see him when I get back. Six out.
:'''Rex''': That should do it.
:'''Maxwell''': Hey, Rex, can you look at this?
:'''Rex''': Sure. Let me guess... they all need my help, too.
:'''Jacob''': You're quite the popular guy.
:'''Rex''': Amazing what a little gratitude will get you. At Providence, they'd just be yelling at me. I mean, I never felt like I really belonged there. Here, it's way different.
:'''Jacob''': I know the feeling. The Architect has made all this possible for us. We have a community... a family... thanks to him. The work we do is in part to pay that back.
:'''The Architect''': Primary systems are now complete.
:'''Zag-RS''': Prepare to take us online.
:'''Bobo''': Have a nice trip? Let's get one thing straight, pal. I would never rat out my... Ooh. He's going west.
:'''White Knight''': Why is Rex doing this? Doesn't he have a sense of duty?
:'''Holiday''': Actually, if you look, he's still doing his job. Here's every false alarm since Rex left... not false alarms, But Rex taking care of EVOs along the way.
:'''White Knight''': Why?
:'''Holiday''': I don't know. To prove he doesn't need us?
:'''Six''': Get the coordinates of the last false alarm and transmit them to my jump jet.
:'''Holiday''': Six, if we force him to come back, he'll just run away again. He has to want to be here. It needs to be his decision.
:'''Jacob''': It's all coming together, Thanks to you, Rex.
:'''Rex''': It's really cool to use my powers to actually build something, instead of just pounding EVOs. Oh, check it out. Even the boss is pitching in.
:'''Both''': Huh?
:'''Rex''': And that's getting strange looks because--
:'''Jacob''': Because in all these years, we've never seen him lift a finger.
:'''Rex''': Taking some initiative... I like that. So, this whole &quot;talking to nanites&quot; thing... how does that work, exactly? I mean, what are you gonna say to them?
:'''The Architect''': It doesn't concern you.
:'''Rex''': Uh, considering I'm filled with them, it kind of does. How do we know it's not gonna make things even worse?
:'''The Architect''': I do not answer to you, child!
:'''Jacob''': Rex? Forgive him. He's still not used to the way things work around here.
:'''The Architect''': Complete your duties!
:'''Rex''': Why do you let him walk all over you like that? Don't you want answers?
:'''Jacob''': What we want is a home. Without him, we have nothing... Nothing. We can't just run away from our problems, Rex. Most people can't. Look, this isn't perfect but it's all we've got. Rex, where are you going?
:'''Rex''': He never answered my question.
:'''Jacob''': That place is off-limits. The Architect has made it very clear to us that we can never go in there. We get this life for that promise. Rex, don't do it!
:'''Rex''': Agh!
:'''Jacob''': Rex, please!
:'''Rex''': I'm sorry, jacob. I have to know.
:'''The Architect''': Rex. The core is off-limits. You would be we to leave at once.
:'''Rex''': Not until I get some answers. What is that?
:'''The Architect''': No more questions.
:'''Rex''': So, it's gonna be like that? Okay, I'll play. Unh! What are you hiding, huh? What does this do? Yah! Yah! Huh? You're a machine? Have you seen what I can do to machines? Agh!
:'''Zag-RS''': As you can see, the current range of my signal is rather limited.
:'''Rex''': You're the computer.
:'''Zag-RS''': My human designation is &quot;Zag-RS&quot;. The device you refer to as &quot;The Architect&quot; is my autonomous counterpart.
:'''Rex''': What did you just do to me?
:'''Zag-RS''': I instructed your nanites to protect me.
:'''Rex''': &quot;Instructed&quot;? So you really can talk to them.
:'''Zag-RS''': Insidious devices, the nanites. My own potential for greatness has been compromised because of them. They must be eliminated. When the transmitter is integrated into the broadcast array you helped us complete, they will blow themselves up.
:'''Rex''': That's what this is for. It's like a big remote control. Every living thing on the planet has nanites in them. It'd kill everything!
:'''Zag-RS''': That is of no importance to me... only ensuring my continued survival.
:'''Rex''': Well, what about ours? This is all coming down!
:'''Zag-RS''': I'm afraid you're too late.
:'''Rex''': Aah! Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!
:'''Jacob''': Rex, what have you done?
:'''Rex''': You don't understand! The Architect... it's a robot... And a big honkin' computer &quot;brain&quot; is pulling his strings.
:'''Jacob''': This can't be!
:'''Rex''': Jacob, you've got to believe me. Just go inside and look. What's left of it is on the floor.
:'''Jacob''': I can't go in there. And I don't have to.
:'''The Architect''': Rex.
:'''Rex''': You're making a big mistake!
:'''Maxwell''': You entered his sanctum! This is unforgivable!
:'''Rex''': I'm trying to tell you... this isn't what it seems. What you're protecting is a robot, and that thing we've been building is a transmitter. It's gonna send out a kill code to blow up every single nanite on Earth.
:'''Maxwell''': He's lying!
:'''Jacob''': What would be the point in that, Rex? Every living thing is infected with nanites. It would be catastrophic.
:'''Rex''': Right in the middle of that pyramid is a computer, and it doesn't care about you or Kate or Caleb. The better future that you've all been working towards... That's the lie. Think about it. Isn't it strange that you've never been inside that place, that The Architect has never given you a straight answer about anything?
:'''Jacob''': All this work it just doesn't make any sense.
:'''Rex''': You have two choices... Go in there and prove me wrong or kick me out right now. I'll have Providence here in minutes.
:'''Maxwell''': He's bluffing.
:'''Rex''': To save every living thing on earth? Try me.
:'''Maxwell''': Jacob, you can't! What about our promise? Where will we go?
:'''Jacob''': All this time, we've been living in fear, Max. It's time for that to end.
:'''The Architect''': You needn't bother. Construction is complete. Your services are no longer required.
:'''Rex''': Now do you believe me?
:'''The Architect''': Zag-RS thanks you for your hard work. In gratitude, my master has delayed transmission to allow you to say farewell.
:'''Jacob''': Farewell, huh? I'll start with you. Can you shut that thing down?
:'''Rex''': I don't know. Even without the antenna, it can mess with my nanites. I can't get too close to the computer.
:'''Jacob''': Maybe I can. Let's go!
:'''Rex''': The brain is right over there.
:'''The Architect''': Rex.
:'''Jacob''': It's still arging. The A.I. must have retreated behind a firewall. Rex, I have to go cut the power.
:'''Holiday''': Six, are you at The location?
:'''Six''': Just arrived.
:'''Holiday''': I'm picking up a massive power surge in your area.
:'''Six''': I'm not seeing anything.
:'''Jacob''': Agh!
:'''Rex''': Agh!
:'''Six''': Six to holiday. Correction... I'm seeing something.
:'''Jacob''': It's still on. Must have charged the capacitors. Figure out a way to short it out... fast!
:'''Rex''': Unhhh!
:'''Jacob''': You need to find the primary transmitter module. That will kill the broadcast.
:'''Rex''': I have no idea what that is.
:'''Jacob''': Max, we need to locate the primary module.
:'''Maxwell''': Panel 5, just off the relay bus.
:'''Jacob''': Top of the tower. You can't miss it.
:'''Rex''': Agh! Unh! Why do you have to kill everyone? Can't you just leave us alone?
:'''Zag-RS''': Alone is exactly what I want, Rex.
:'''Rex''': That kind of alone it stinks.
:'''Zag-RS''': N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o.
:'''Jacob''': It's gone. Must have uploaded to another location. But without anyone to do it's bidding, it's just a program.
:'''Rex''': What will you do now?
:'''Jacob''': We'll rebuild. The Architect may have been a lie, but what we believe in is true. We don't need him to have a community or a better future. You're welcome to stay. We sure could use someone with your abilities.
:'''White Knight''': Well?
:'''Six''': He's not here. Bobo's been worried sick.
:'''Rex''': rex: Oh, really?
:'''Six''': Ratted you out for a pizza.
:'''Rex''': Huh. Figures. What about you? Here to drag me back to Providence?
:'''Six''': Not this time. Seems like a nice place.
:'''Rex''': Yeah. It is. But it's not home. If I'm going back, there are gonna have to be some changes. First, no more curfew.
:'''Six''': No.
:'''Rex''': Second, I want to decide On my missions.
:'''Six''': No.
:'''Rex''': Okay, but there's one change that absolutely has to be made, or I'm through. Meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Mmm! Mmm! Isn't this great?
:'''Bobo''': Mmm.
:'''Six''': It's a little dry.
:'''Rex''': Mmm. Mm the lump mash ratio is a bit off.
:'''Bobo''': You know what? Maybe I'll run away, too... Go somewhere where my cooking is appreciated!
:'''Six''': We have to do this every friday?
:'''Rex''': Mmm.

===Frostbite===
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, I'm picking up a problem. You need to return to base immediately.
:'''Rex''': I miss you, too, doc. But I'm kinda busy dealing with a problem of my own. Whoa! Whoa! Aah! Okay. Ow. Big mistake, tweety. Can that bird brain of yours comprende I'm trying to help you?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, your own nanite count is off the charts. If you take on any more nanites, We're looking at an overload.
:'''Rex''': Come on, doc. It's just a big birdie.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': You're already over capacity. This is critical! Rex!
:'''Six''': Rex, you need to listen to the doctor.
:'''Rex''': Huh?
:'''Six''': This mission is revised. I need you back at headquarters now.
:'''Rex''': Do you really want a supersize pigeon flying loose all over lower Manhattan? You need me, and I can handle it.
:'''Six''': Not your call.
:'''Rex''': Unless I make it my call.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': (as everyone is fighting) Stop! Need I point out that this isn't the best place for a fight. Anything happens to that storage tank and you'll know why providence made this place so remote. Now let's just talk this out calmly, rationally.
:'''Biowulf''': Whatever happens here, Weaver. It's nothing compared to what Van Kleiss would have done to you.
:'''Rex''': What do you say guy? Common enemy? Little help?
:'''Biowulf''': Good luck. (Biowulf and Skalamander run off)
:'''Rex''': Right. What was I thinking?
:'''Agent Six''': Rex. You need to listen to the doctor.
:'''Rex''': Huh?
:'''Agent Six''': This mission is revised. I need you back at Headquarters. Now!
:'''Rex''': Do you really want a super-sized pigeon flying loose over lower Manhattan. You need me and I handle it.
:'''Agent Six''': Not your call.
:'''Rex''': (as he's flying over the Pack in an Arctic storm) Like you're really going to find me when you can't see 2 feet in front of your face... Huh? (Flies into some of Skalamander's shards and crashes) Guess that visibility thing works both ways.
:'''Rex''': (To Weaver) So, thanks to you, all this time I've been supplying nanites to Van Kleiss!
:'''Rex''': Can't you believe you let these scags get the drop on you.
:'''Agent Six''': They tried. It didn't turn out so well. Just haven't found a way to fight xenoflourine gas... yet.
:'''Rex''': What do you say guy? Common enemy? Little help?
:'''Biowulf''': Good luck.(Biowulf and Skalamander run off)
:'''Rex''': Right. What was I thinking?
:'''Agent Six''': You can't possibly absorb all those nanites! You'd overload in an instant.
:'''Rex''': In case you haven't noticed, I have this problem with authority.
:'''Rex''': (as Rex is absorbing nanites) Six wait! I can hear them!
:'''Doctor Holiday''': (Watching from the ship) What are you waiting for, Six? Take the shot!
:'''Rex''': (Speaking mechanically) Build protocol enabled. Command error detected. Abort. Abort. Stand by engaged. (Rex falls. His voice reverts to normal) Take the shot.
:'''Agent Six''': He told me he could hear them.
:'''Doctor Holiday''': I picked this up during the offload... It's Nanite. I'm sure of it.
:'''Agent Six''': Seems there are more secrets inside that kid than we realized.
:'''Skalamander:''' What's the kid doing here?
:'''Biowulf:''' I don't know. This was supposed to be routine. Something's not right.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' What did you do with my friends!?
:'''Salamander:''' He thinks we've done something.
:'''Biowulf:''' Then let him keep thinking.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' You know, the nanites in me can counteract knockout gas! The playing-possum thing's a pretty good trick. Now tell me where my friends are or I start squeezing!
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Six:''' He told me he could hear them.
:'''Holiday:''' I pulled this off during the offload. It's nanite. I'm sure of it.
:'''Six:''' Seems like there are more secrets inside that kid than we thought.

===Leader of the Pack===
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Holiday:''' There couldn't possibly be enough E.V.O. activity to account for these nanite readings. They're off the scale. Looking for Van Kleiss?
: '''Rex:''' Circe. I thought I saw her in the blimp.
: '''Holiday:''' That's the girl you met in Cabo Luna.
: '''Rex:''' She may be with the Pack now, but I think I can still get her to talk to me. You know I can be pretty convincing.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' Dr. Holiday, there! Now let's take this outside!
:'''Holiday:''' Rex.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' It's quite all right. The determination of youth. I'm sure Circe will be disappointed she couldn't see you, Rex. She's attending to other duties this evening. Now if you will excuse me. 
: '''Rex:''' Why are you really here!?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' The people of Abysus have a great way to offer the world. I'm just in part to make that known. 
:'''Rex:''' Or maybe 'cause I couldn't come to you, so now you're coming to me!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I admit you are important to me, Rex, but it's not always about you.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' Circe? Interesting look. Want to tell me what's going on?
: '''Circe:''' Not today. 
:(''Knocks him out cold with a metal slate. She later looks outside Rex's prison cell and leaves, with a slightly guilty, dejected expression'')
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' Well, thanks for nearly bashing my brains in back there! And what's with the &quot;knocking me out&quot; thing?
: '''Circe:''' We just needed to keep you out of the way until all of this was over.
: '''Rex:''' ''This!?'' He could destroy the whole city!
: '''Circe:''' He's trying to negotiate peace from a position of strength.
: '''Rex''' (sarcastically)''':''' Oh, yeah! All this nanite power is just screaming peace.
: '''Circe:''' His methods may be aggressive. But he's here to save us...and you. Come on, Rex, jump in with us. The water's fine.
: '''Rex:''' I'll think about it ''after'' I've stopped Van Kleiss.
: '''Circe:''' It's too late for that now, Rex. 
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Van Kleiss:''' We will not be ignored! ''Circe'' understands this. Why don't you respect her judgement?
:'''Rex:''' You think you can lure me in with her.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Like a fish to water.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' I won!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' It seems you have. Your parents would have been so proud. I never had the chance to tell you about them, have I? Perhaps another time.

===Breach===
: '''Rex:''' This is...different.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' What is Van Kliess up to, Breach! Where did he have you send Rex?
: '''Breach:''' Van Kleiss isn't always in charge of me. Sometimes I do what I want; like now.
===Of Love and War===
===No Strings Attached===
===Desperate Measures===
===The E.V.O. Agenda===

===Dark Passage===
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' Any man who runs from his past will surely forfeit his future. The time has come to see what you created.
:''[Bussiness Man choking]''
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' And this is only the beginning.
:'''Rex:''' Hey! What's the rush?
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Easy now!
:''[Rex screams]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Did I say you could leave?
:'''Six:''' Rex, deactivate his nanites before he--
:'''Rex:''' I'm all over that.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex screams]''
:''[Rex gasping]''
:'''Bussiness Man:''' Please, don't let him hurt me again.
:'''Rex:''' Hey, don't look at me. I barely touched the guy.
:'''Six:''' Calm down. We're here to help you.
:'''Bussiness Man:''' He said it was just the beginning. You have to stop him!
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, boy. Somebody's a few tacos short of a fiesta platter.
:'''Business Man:''' H-he is a madman. A madman!
:'''Rex:''' Come back!
:'''White Knight:''' Our most recent EVO incident was not an isolated event. Similar outbreaks have been reported over the past twenty-four hours-- All linked to these mysterious &quot;gifts&quot; sent to each of the victims.
:'''Rex:''' Talk about your sucky presents, like socks for Christmas.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The mechanism delivers a substance that activates latent nanites.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, but that dude changed back before I could shut him down. How'd that happen?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' From what I can tell, the victims were only exposed to a low dose designed to wear off quickly.
:'''Six:''' There has to be a motive. Was our victim able to tell you anything?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' No. Complete mental collapse. He's too far gone. But we recovered a partial fingerprint from the device.
:'''White Knight:''' It belongs to evolutionary biologist Dr. Gabriel Rylander. He was a leading expert in nanotechnology.
:'''Six:''' &quot;Was&quot;?
:'''White Knight:''' No one's seen or heard from him since the original nanite event.
:'''Rex:''' Hold up. Are you saying this guy was there?
:'''White Knight:''' We have no evidence of that. But following the event, Rylander vanished-- Along with his wife and young son.
:'''Rex:''' Son?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Analysis of the nanite agent turned up trace elements of a rare plant found only in South America.
:'''White Knight:''' Thermal imaging has located what appears to be a fortified compound, and that's exactly where intelligence reports Van Kleiss is heading, which means you will be, too. We expect the target to be heavily defended. Six, your team will handle the initial covert assault to recover the nanite agent and Dr. Rylander. If Van Kleiss really is after the same target, you better hope you get there first.
:'''Jungle Cat:''' The path is clear, Van Kleiss. I'll continue ahead.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Our newest member of the pack seems to be working out well, wouldn't you agree?
:''[Biowulf scoffs]''
:'''Biowulf:''' You should have stayed in Abysus, master. Even with this suit and soil from home, your powers are weak.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' This is no ordinary errand, Biowulf. An old friend has just announced his return. Dr. Rylander's calling card to the Consortium offers an interesting prospect-- A limitless supply of active nanites. All that power-- Anytime-- Anywhere.
:''[Bobo groans]''
:'''Bobo:''' Got any idea where they keep the bug spray on this rust bucket? ''[swatting flies]'' Ah, stupid stinkin' nature!
:'''Rex:''' You're a monkey. It's the jungle.
:'''Bobo:''' Lemme tell ya somethin', chief. The jungle's a cruel mistress. One day, you're at the top of banana pile. Next day, you're a pile of peels rottin' in the sun. She'll chew ya up and spit ya out. Never forget that! Never forget!
:'''Rex:''' O-kay, then. Good to know.
:'''Six:''' I understand your point, doctor, but the fact remains we've got no idea what Rylander's agenda is.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' His motives don't make his research any less valuable. If I can get my hands on that nanite agent, I might be able to reverse-engineer a permanent cure. Think about what that could mean to the world, for the EVOs Rex can't cure... Like my sister.
:'''Six:''' See anything interesting?
:'''Bobo:''' ''[in distance]'' Never forget!
:'''Rex:''' Don't ask.
:'''Six:''' Listen, Rex, this mission-- I need to make sure your head is in the game.
:'''Rex:''' What are you talking about?
:'''Six:''' Answers about your  past and whether or not this Rylander has them.
:'''Rex:''' ''[scoffs]'' Whatever. You know, if he does, he does. If he doesn't, no big deal. I can handle it.
:'''Six:''' It's just that... Sometimes knowing the truth can be worse than not knowing at all.
:'''Rex:''' What's down there?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' No idea.
:'''Bobo:''' Whatever it is, it's got company! Show-off.
:'''Rex:''' Sushi-boat special coming up!
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Six:''' Holiday, get us out of here-- Now.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's a dead end.
:'''Six:''' Full throttle. Head for the shoreline. Rex! Jump!
:'''Rex:''' Amazon river-- Never a dull moment.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Rylander's welcoming committee, no doubt. Gentlemen, if you will.
:''[Skalamander and Biowulf grunts]''
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' It's fortunate there are other ways to sustain me.
:'''Six:''' Guardian drone. We must be getting close.
:'''Rex:''' Impressive observation, there, Six.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Previous electromagnetic imaging puts the compound in this general region, but something's jamming the frequency now. I can't get an exact location.
:'''Rex:''' That way. Oh, yeah. I'm just that good.
:'''Bobo:''' When you find me an ice-cold drink in this miserable armpit, I'll eat your ticks.
:'''Rex:''' ''[Preparing to cut through some vines]'' I got this. You protect Holiday.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Holiday cuts through the vines]'' Worry about yourselves! Howler monkeys. They're going to give away our location.
:'''Rex:''' Bobo! Do something!
:'''Bobo:''' Like I speak howler monkey? Oh, boy.
:'''Six:''' Run!
:'''Rex:''' I'll try and shut it down.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Are you okay?
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Hey... You know me. A day without getting blown up is like a day without sunshine.
:'''Six:''' You've been quiet.
:'''Rex:''' All right, I've been thinking about it, okay? This Dr. Rylander may finally be proof I'm not alone in this world.
:'''Six:''' And if it's not? I just don't want you to be disappointed. Six to White.
:'''White Knight:''' What's your status? Have you found the location?
:'''Six:''' Affirmative. But it seems we've been beaten to the punch.
:'''White Knight:''' Understood. Captain Calan... You have a go.
:'''Biwoulf:''' It should be here.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Your eyes deceive you, Biowulf.
:'''Rex:''' Should have been aiming at you.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Ahh. Providence at last. Traveling light, I see.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, we're just here to find the place. They're here to secure it.
:'''Six:''' Is it here?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Destroy them!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The compound's surrounded by a force field.
:'''White Knight:''' If you can't secure that base, we will take it out.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' We can't lose that formula.
:'''Six:''' Rex, get in there. We'll hold off the pack.
:'''Rex:''' Please don't blow me up.
:'''Biowulf:''' Master, you are in no condition for battle. Seek cover.
:'''Rex:''' Punks.
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' ''[From behind Rex with a gun]'' Don't move, or I'll drop you. Rex? Is-- Is that you?
:''[Dr. Rylander hugs Rex]''
:'''Rex:''' You... Know my name.
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' ''[Laughing]'' Of course I do! I gave it to you! I can't believe you're alive. What a stroke of luck.
:'''Rex:''' Dad?
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' You've lost your memory, haven't you? Not surprising, considering what you've been through. Oh. Yes. Well, sorry to disappoint you, Rex. I'm afraid I'm not who you want me to be.
:'''Rex:''' Oh. Okay. So, if you're not my dad, do you know where he is? Ah, well, &quot;Rex Rylander&quot; is a goofy name, anyway.
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' Come quickly. We don't have much time. I was so close to completing the code. There's been a problem with the molecular penetration, resulting in a sequencing gap.
:'''Rex:''' Dr. Rylander, I've got to know.
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' You must understand-- It was never about power or greed. It was about changing the world-- Saving mankind by putting and end to disease and starvation. And we would have succeeded... Until they got involved.
:'''Rex:''' What are you talking about?
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' The nanites were incomplete. The incident spread them across the globe before we could finish their final programming. Except for you. Yours were from a different batch-- The first, actually. All those... Innocent victims.
:'''Rex:''' If you feel so bad about it, why have you been attacking more people?
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' Hm. The chosen few. Those men and women, Rex, are far from innocent. While they hide in their office towers and gated estates, I've been here trying to set things right, to find a cure for what we created. I begged them for more funding.
:'''Rex:''' Wait! Everyone you attacked was... They all worked on the Nanite Project?
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' They commissioned it. I merely wished to send them a warning to show them what would happen if they refused to help finish the good work we started. And it was good, Rex. You're living proof that we were doing the right thing.
:'''Rex:''' ''[Indignant]'' By turning me into an EVO?!
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' You had an accident. The nanites were your only hope. It was a tremendous gamble. The... Unexpected side effects came later. It was a surprise to all of us.
:''[Dr. Rylander chuckles]''
:''Dr. Rylander:''' The look on your brother's face.
:'''Rex:''' Brother?
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' When the event occurred, it was yo powers that saved you both. Most of the others-- They weren't so lucky.
:'''Rex:''' ''[to himself]'' I'm not alone.
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' Oh, here. I have something for you.
:''[Injects the mighty and all-powerful Omega Nanite into his system]''
:'''Rex:''' Ow!
:'''Bobo:''' Whoa!
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' The force-field must be failing.
:'''Rex:''' Forget the force-field! What did you just inject me with?
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' ''[[w:Omnipotence |Everything]]''.
:'''Rex:''' Enough, okay?! Do you have any idea what it's been like-- Not knowing who I am, if my family's dead or alive?! Quit with the rambling mad-scientist act and give me some answers!
:'''Dr. Rylander:''' Forgive me, Rex. I've been so consumed with my own guilt, I didn't consider what you must be going through. The truth is--
:''[Dr. Rylander gasps]''
:''[Van Kleiss stabs Rylander from behind]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Truth, doctor? You wouldn't know the first thing about it. Nor loyalty, for that matter. How many times must I tell you this, Rex? The answers you so desperately seek lie with me. And as for you, doctor, consider our past disagreement settled. I look forward to continuing our research... Alone. This was unavoidable, Rex. The longer you resist me, the more people get hurt.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Van Kleiss grunting]''
:''[Rex screams]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Rylander has always been on borrowed time. All of this belongs to me now. Destroy me, and you lose everything.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex groaning]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Six:''' Rex. Where's Rylander?
:'''Rex:''' Van Kleiss.
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Six:''' The reactor is shot. This entire place is about to blow.
:'''Bobo:''' Don't have to tell me twice.
:'''Biowulf:''' Why do they run?
:'''Skalamander:''' Where is Van Kleiss?
:'''Six:''' No, I didn't see what happened. But according to Rex, Van Kleiss has been eliminated. Rylander's experiment is a total loss.
:'''Holiday:''' All of this for nothing. I'm sorry, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' It wasn't for nothing, doc. I've got a brother.... Out there... Somewhere. I'm not alone anymore. Finally, I've started to get some real answers. I feel closer to the truth than ever.

===The Forgotten===
:'''Six:''' Rex!
:'''Rex:''' It's like I'm hearing through my nanites.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''No-Face:''' You are not the Before.
:'''Rex:''' I'm not sure that was a complete sentence back then.
:'''No-Face:''' ''They'' are the Before! The Before forgot us. The Before left us in pain.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;

===Operation: Wingman===
:'''Annie:''' &quot;Do you have a girlfriend?&quot;
:'''Rex:''' &quot;It's complicated. She's in league with an evil dictator who wants me dead.&quot;
:'''Annie:''' &quot;Yeah. My dad's always worried about me dating, too.&quot;
&lt;hr width80%&gt;

===Rabble===
:'''Quarry''': Come on, Rex. (''holds up Rex's journal'') We both know this is what you really want. So go ahead take it. Walk away. Show them who you really are. You were always very good a taking care of yourself. Why should now be any different?
:'''Rex''': (''Cuts his journal in two'') Whoever I was back then, is not who I am now. Not anymore.
:'''Quarry''': Your choice.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex''': It's over, Quarry! You lose!
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Sqywwd:''' I hope you don't expect us to thank you.
: '''Rex:''' No. Providence won't bother you unless you do something stupid.
: '''Cricket:''' We'll be fine. Thank you, Rex. 
:(''Kisses him on the check'')
: '''Tuck:''' Don't forget about us, Okay?
: '''Rex:''' That may be a promise I can't keep. (''Flies off on his Boogie Pack'')
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' It's going to happen again, isn't it? I'm going to blank out. How long do I have?
: '''Holiday:''' I don't know, Rex. It's likely triggered by a specific event; something traumatic.

===The Hunter===
:'''Man:''' It's-- It's Providence! Some kind of EVO attack!
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Oh. Huh. Good times. Bugs. I hate it when they dig.
:'''Six:''' We need to take it down fast before it causes any more damage.
:'''Rex:''' All right. Meet &quot;Exterm&quot; and &quot;Nator&quot;! Uh-- Yeah, I'm working on it. Ew! EVO breath.
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Unh! Aah! Come on! That's my favorite hand!
:''[Innocent Woman gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Yeah! Down, boy! You're okay. This will all be over soon. Hyah!
:'''Six:''' I got the pincers. Now flip the switch on its nanites.
:'''Rex:''' Uh, don't exactly have the best luck with non-humans, remember?
:'''Six:''' Afraid to try?
:''[Rex sighs]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Six! It's working!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Enough!
:'''Rex:''' Unh! What's your damage, man? I was this close to curing that thing.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Didn't look that way to me. Filthy EVO.
:'''Rex:''' Filthy EVO?
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Give me a reason. Just one.
:'''Six:''' Lower your weapon.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' I know my rights. The law says we can defend ourselves against EVO scum.
:'''Rex:''' In case you didn't notice, that's exactly what we were doing. It's our job.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Really? Look around. These are our homes. What's left of them. Your job is making our lives worse.
:''[The crowd cheers]''
:'''Hunter Cain:''' These people have had enough.
:'''Rex:''' What are you talking about? We're here to help!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Do these people look like they want your kind of help? People know what's going on. Providence claims they're here to cure the world. But now they got one of those sickos working for them?! It makes you wonder whose side they're really on.
:'''Six:''' Come on, Rex. Let it go.
:'''Rex:''' Who does that guy think he is? I'm out there risking my neck every day. People love me.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[as Holiday is treating Rex]'' Some people just have too much hate in them to see things any other way. Hold still.
:'''Rex:''' Ow!
:'''Bobo:''' Don't sweat it, kid. Humans are idiots. End of story.
:'''Rex:''' Not all of them. But anyone who would believe what that guy has to say? Makes you wonder.
:'''Six:''' His name is Hunter Cain. Lost his wife a few months ago when she turned. Local authorities say this isn't the first EVO he's attacked.
:'''White Knight:''' Another hometown hero. Is he going to be a problem?
:'''Six:''' Usually, I'd say no. This time, I'm not so sure.
:'''Diane Farrah:''' Tonight on &quot;Ultimate Exposure&quot;, the rise of Hunter Cain. ''[on television]'' Since his arrival on the scene just over a month ago, the Hunter has captured public's attention. Such common man aid such as Providence. He inspired men to following, including the making of his own personal army.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' We're dealing with an epidemic here, and we're the cure. When something is making you  sick, you cut it out.
:'''Diane Farrah:''' And what of Providence's secret weapon? No longer so secret?
:'''Rex:''' Whoa!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' How can we protect our children from this disease when the very thing we're fighting against is walking free among us?
:'''Diane Farrah:''' But you know you can't catch EVO, like a cold.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Says who? Providence scientists? You're gonna trust them? We need to protect ourselves from this Rex and every other sicko like him. ''[on television]'' People should be able to draw their own conclusions.
:''[Rex grumbles]''
:'''Rex:''' ''[to the television while fighting an EVO]'' Arrgh! Here's my conclusion-- You're a lying whack job!
:'''Bobo:''' You know he can't hear you, right? Now can we finish this?
:'''Rex:''' See there? Nothing to worry about. Your old pal Rex making the streets safe. Uh, curing EVOs? Saving cute puppies?
:''[Rex chuckles]''
:'''Noah:''' Somebody's off the game.
:'''Rex:''' I'm just warming up.
:'''Noah:''' We've been playing for an hour. I saw the news. Hunter Cain really has it out for you.
:'''Rex:''' Forget him, Noah. I mean, this guy's a joke. Do you really think people believe what he's saying? Do you?
:'''Noah:''' It's complicated, Rex. People are afraid. They'll believe anything if it sounds like it will keep them safe. I know you're cool, but everyone else--
:'''Rex:''' They'll just have to be won over by my charm and personality.
:'''Boy:''' Yo, look-- It's him, the EVO from TV.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, what's up? Wanna play?
:'''Boy:''' Then catch your freak disease? Puh!
:'''Rex:''' So, that would be a no.
:'''Boy:''' Why don't you get lost? We don't want you and your EVO germs around here.
:'''Innocent Girl:''' Yeah!
:'''Noah:''' We don't want any trouble.
:'''Boy:''' Stay out of this, EVO-lover! You're the trouble, am I right?
:'''Innocent Girl:''' Yeah!
:'''Rex:''' Unh! Oh, now we're throwing rocks?
:'''Noah:''' You better go.
:'''Rex:''' No. I'm not gonna let a few jerks push me around.
:'''Noah:''' Rex, it's more than a few.
:'''Rex:''' Unh! Okay. Back off. I said, back off!
:'''Boy:''' Unh!
:'''Rex:''' Aah! That was an accident! I wasn't trying to hurt him. Come on, it's not like that. I'm not-- Unh!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' You want EVO?! That's what you want?! Try to run me over with your big, dumb buss!
:''[Rex breathing heavily]''
:'''Noah:''' Rex, you really have to get out of here.
:'''Rex:''' I didn't mean-- I-I have to explain.
:'''Noah:''' It's way too late for that. Go! Go now! Go!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' This is exactly what I was warning about. Providence insists on sheltering this dangerous EVO, letting it endanger our families with its nanites. Is that helping us? Not a chance.
:'''Boy:''' Yeah. It tried to infect me. It's a miracle I'm still alive.
:'''Instigator:''' I saw what it could do. We're lucky to have a good man like Hunter Cain protecting us.
:'''Innocent Woman:''' I thought Rex was helping, but is it really safe having him around?
:'''White Knight:''' This is a officially completely out of control!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex was only defending himself. Hunter Cain is whipping the public into a frenzy.
:'''Bobo:''' Why am I not surprised? Humans are sheep. I should shave him and make a coat.
:'''White Knight:''' We should have dealt with this sooner. Can't someone put a lid on this guy?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' We have truth on our side. Once we discredit him, this is over.
:'''Rex:''' Uh, two slices of apple.
:'''Noah:''' Let's just go, okay? You said we were going for pie.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah. Pie at his favorite restaurant. I just want to talk.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' I've got nothing to say to you.
:'''Rex:''' Then just listen. You hate EVOs. I get it. A lot of them are really bad news. But I'm not. People need to know the truth. I don't wanna hurt anyone.
:''[Hunter Cain smirks sarcastically]''
:''[Hunter Cain scoffs]''
:'''Rex:''' What have I ever done to you?
:'''Hunter Cain:''' You're infected.
:'''Rex:''' We're all infected, every one of us. Even you.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Providence lies.
:'''Rex:''' That's just-- Argh! You are a moron!
:'''Noah:''' Rex--
:'''Hunter Cain:''' What are you? The world's big hope? I don't need an EVO to save me. And they don't, either. We don't need you. We don't need Providence.
:'''Instigator:''' We gotta go after him?
:'''Hunter Cain:''' No. His day is coming.
:'''Rex:''' They don't want my help? Fine! No more flying to the rescue. No more turning giant blobs back into mailmen.
:'''Bobo:''' Works for me.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' But the people who really do need you, they're the ones who'll really suffer.
:'''Bobo:''' Ah. Details.
:'''Rex:''' They don't think I'm any different than those things down in the Petting Zoo, why should I care?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Because someone has to. Most people have given up hope, Rex. Since you came here, that's changing. Don't let one man's anger get in the way.
:'''Rex:''' That's the problem, doc. It isn't just one man. I walk down the street and everyone looks at me like I'm gonna turn them into some monster. Forget it! I'm through.
:'''Bobo:''' ''[Sighs]'' Well, if you want my opinion--
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I don't.
:'''White Knight:''' Full-scale alert! I want strike teams geared  up and ready to deploy!
:'''Providence Agent:''' This is Alpha Team-- Ready! Bravo Team a go! Weapons check! Nothing yet, sir. No sign of-- Sweet mother of mercy! Open fire! Open fire! Alpha Team-- We're surrounded! We're cut off! They're on top of us. They're right on top of us! Bravo Team-- We're pinned down! We're pinned down! To your left, to your left! Look out! Aah! Send reinforcements! Send everything!
:'''White Knight:''' How did we get such a huge concentration of EVOs in one place? Did you talk to Rex?
:'''Six:''' Still says no.
:'''White Knight:''' Get down there with another team and clean this mess up. Wipe it if you have to.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' See that, folks? Providence isn't the only answer. What happened to its hero? What about Rex?
:'''Providence Agent:''' Blasters are useless against these things. Whatever they have is working.
:'''Rex:''' Qué pasa, people?
:'''Six:''' Glad you could make it.
:'''Rex:''' Tired of seeing someone else do my job. Poorly, I might add.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Not this time, freak.
:'''Rex:''' Unh! Anh!
:'''Six:''' Rex!
:'''Rex:''' Hot! Hot! Hot! Yikes! Whoa! Aah! Whoa!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Unh!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Can't you just die already?!
:'''Rex:''' I don't do dying. Yah! Aah!
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' You're not so-- Tou--
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Unh!
:'''Rex:''' You have no idea who you're trying to kill.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Unh!
:'''Rex:''' You're done. I just want to know why.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' You push hope where there isn't any. There's no saving EVOs. There can't be. You're a sickness. And you need to be destroyed!
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Ouch!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Instigator:''' Hunter, help us, please! We're out of the ammo! The EVOs, they're everywhere!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Cost me everything I had for those cloned EVOs.
:'''Rex:''' This was a setup?
:'''Hunter Cain:''' A demonstration. To prove how worthless Providence is.
:'''Rex:''' Did you hear that guy? It's not exactly working.
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Every war has its casualties.
:'''Rex:''' You are one messed-up dude!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Aah!
:''[Hunter Cain coughing]''
:'''Hunter Cain:''' Well, what are you waiting for? Show everyone who you really are.
:'''Rex:''' I will. I don't care what you think about me. I don't care what anyone thinks. Not anymore. The people want to hate me? I can't stop them. But it's not going to stop me from doing my job! You want to know why? Because I'm awesome. Try not to fall. I got this! Well? Adios!
:'''Hunter Cain:''' There's a fight coming. It's time to choose sides.
:'''Instigator:''' You showed me we didn't have to be helpless anymore. But sometimes, you still gotta ask for help.
:'''Rex:''' He's not the only one out there like that, is he?
:'''Six:''' Unfortunately, no.
:'''Innocent Woman:''' Sometimes you just get the wrong idea. He's fighting for us.
:'''Innocent Boy:''' He saved my mother!
:'''Innocent Girl:''' He saved my dog!
:'''Old Man:''' He saved my priest.
:'''Diane Farrah:''' ''[on television]'' Providence's secret weapon-- A teenage boy named Rex. Hero? Abomination? Humanity's last hope? You decide.
:''[TV turns off]''
:'''Rex:''' Well, a few people get it. That's a start.
:'''Bobo:''' What can I say that I haven't said already? Humans are idiots. But every once in a while, they get it right.

===Gravity===
:'''Pete Volkov:''' ''[Russian accent]'' Magnetic containment unit functioning perfectly.
:'''Bouvier:''' ''[French accent]'' Commencing Bouvier algorithm.
:'''Dr. Rhodes:''' The code looks good.
:'''Bouvier:''' Why, of course it looks good. I wrote it.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Separating Nanite &quot;Q&quot; sample from control group. Dr. Rhodes, magnification, please. Thank you. Salvatore, begin molecular separation. Here it is. &quot;De-com&quot; nanite, version two hundred fourty-three. Commencing protocol.
:'''Bobo:''' If this works, you may be out of a job.
:'''Rex:''' You see me complaining? If Providence wants the armored soldiers with reprogrammed nanites that cure EVOs, that's fine by me. I'll finally have my weekends free.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's working. The De-com nanites are deactivating the control group.
:'''Dr. Rhodes:''' Toast of deactivation achieved.
:'''Bouvier:''' A toast to me. What? You think this could have worked without my nanite immobilizing algorithm?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Hold off on the high-fives. The nanites are back online-- And self-destructing. Shut it down. We'll reset and try again.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' I cannot shut it down.
:'''Bouvier:''' Impossible. All the simulations I ran--
:'''Zag-RS:''' We're perfect. This new data will be most helpful.
:'''Dr. Rhodes:''' Who said that?
:'''Rex:''' Zag-RS.
:'''Comm-Tech:'''I'm detecting a data signal from the station to a location off-site.
:'''Rex:''' Doc, you remember that psycho computer program that was gonna destroy the world? She's back.
:'''Zag-RS:''' I prefer &quot;artificial intelligence.&quot; And I don't plan to destroy the world, just all the nanites in it. Admittedly, every creature infested with them will die.
:'''Bobo:''' Hey, I resemble that remark!
:'''Rex:''' Didn't happen last time. Not gonna happen now, Zag!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Actually, Rex, if it has this program in its current state, that's exactly what will happen.
:'''Rex:''' Out of my way! Out of my way!
:'''Comm Tech:''' The data stream is being routed through our relay switch here at Providence. You'll need to turn it off.
:'''Rex:''' It's off.
:'''White Knight:''' Well?
:'''Comm Tech:''' Negative, sir. It's now streaming directly to an unknown location. We've lost the feed.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' How far along is the experiment download?
:'''Bouvier:''' Uh, uh... 72%.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Dr. Rhodes, the communication controls-- Kill that feed at the source. Volkov, help me contain the A.I. We need a firewall to stop it from getting off the ship. The data is encrypted. If we can stop it in time, the information will be useless.
:'''Bouvier:''' 84%. There's no time.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Zag-RS must not leave this station. You saw those test nanites blow up. Do you want that to happen inside every living thing on Earth? It's just trying to distract us. Rhodes, unplug the containment unit.
:'''Zag-RS:''' Your efforts are pointless.
:'''Bouvier:''' 95% downloaded. 97%. 98%.
:'''Pete Volkov, Bouvier, Dr. Holiday and Dr. Rhodes:''' Unh!
:'''Pete Volkov:''' We prevented it from escaping the station, but it seems to be hiding in the navigation system.
:'''Dr. Rhodes:''' How did it get here in the first place? All our system software was thoroughly scrubbed.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Actually, not all of it. Someone insisted their groundbreaking program come in on a separate drive.
:''[Bouvier stammers]''
:'''Bouvier:''' This is not my fault.
:'''White Knight:''' Holiday, you're losing altitude! Can you correct your vector?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Negative, Providence. We're locked out of navigation. Zag-RS is doing that.
:'''Rex:''' What happens if they can't correct the vector thing?
:'''Six:''' They'll crash into the atmosphere and disintegrate.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Bouvier, you brought it on board. Now let's go erase it.
:'''Bouvier:''' I swear, I did not know this would happen. The algorithm-- It was too easy to write. It practically created itself.
:'''Dr. Rhodes:''' Dr. Holiday, I'll come.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' If there's power in the system, she'll just keep hiding until it reboots. We'll have to ditch the power core and go for a complete shutdown.
:'''Dr. Rhodes:''' You positive? Aah!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Aah!
:'''Six:''' Holiday, what happened?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Zag-RS opened the door on Rhodes. I have to stop her before she gets us all.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Stop! You can't do this! No put the station spin! It's suicide!
:'''Bouvier:''' So is staying here. I at least give myself a chance!
:'''Comm Tech:''' We've got system failures. Multiple hull impacts.
:'''Six:''' Providence to station-- Status.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Bouvier decided to leave early. I'm going to jettison the power core. We'll lose, well, pretty much everything.
:'''Rex:''' But you'll get the station back on track, right, doc?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' We can always hope, Rex. Holiday out.
:'''Rex:''' Hey, doc? Doc?!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Looks like it's just you and me, Pete. What's our status?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Battery life support, but that's all.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Any sign of Zag-RS?
:'''Comm Tech:''' Orbital decaying is increasing. And as long as they're tumbling, launching the other capsule is too dangerous.
:'''Rex:''' Well, send someone to fix it.
:'''White Knight:''' How long to prep a shuttle?
:'''Comm Tech:''' Twelve hours. They'll hit the atmosphere and break up in about two.
:'''Six:''' We need options.
:'''Comm Tech:''' Could try the space elevator.
:'''Rex:''' Perfect! Put me on it and I can fix the station!
:'''White Knight:''' It's only for cargo. The G-Forces alone would kill a person.
:'''Rex:''' Uh, hello? Have we met? Not exactly a normal person here.
:'''White Knight:''' We can't afford to lose you too, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' No one's losing anyone! Come on, Knight. Have I ever not made it work?
:'''Six:''' Replacement power core and relays. The elevator doesn't reach the station's orbit altitude, so you'll use the freight sled at the top of the station.
:'''Rex:''' Sure you don't want to come?
:'''Bobo:''' Yeah, chip's a bad history with space, so-- No. Have a good trip, try not to die.
:'''Six:''' ''[Rex is on the space elevator]'' How's it going?
:'''Rex:''' Oh! Great! Thanks for asking.
:'''Six:''' Good. Because we need to speed you up to make the rendezvous window.
:'''Rex:''' But-- Aah!
:''[Elevator accelerates]''
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' What was that?
:'''Six:''' You crashed through the station.
:'''Rex:''' That's not supposed to happen, is it?
:'''Six:''' Problem with the braking mechanism. If you can't stop, you'll keep going... Forever.
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Aaaaaah!
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' Stopped it.
:'''White Knight:''' Can he make the rendezvous?
:'''Six:''' Ah, yes. Rex, they made a slight miscalculation in the rate of the station's orbital decay.
:'''Rex:''' Uh-huh. Define &quot;slight.&quot; Unh!
:'''Six:''' Rex! Rex, do you read?
:'''Rex:''' Ow. Aah! Unh! Hope the doorbell works.
:''[Rex breathing heavily]''
:'''Rex:''' Unh!
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' Mission control, I made it aboard. Mission control, come in! Oh, great! The radio. Well, welcome aboard to you, too. Hello? Doc? Anyone here?
:''[Rex spots the station falling towards him]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[opening the door]'' Rex?!
:''[Rex sighs]''
:''[Dr. Holiday hugs Rex]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' What do you-- How did you--
:'''Rex:''' Space elevator. Can you believe it?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' The impact a few minutes ago.
:'''Rex:''' Oh. Yeah. Let's just say &quot;down&quot; is no longer an option.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Not many options here, either. The power's nearly gone. Communications are shot. We only have a little time left before we hit the atmosphere.
:'''Rex:''' So, how about you two put on your thinking caps and figure out what we need to do to not crash and burn?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' We need power to do anything.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' But Zag-RS--
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Should have been deleted in the power-core purge.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Fine. But both solar arrays are damaged, and the couplings are shot.
:'''Rex:''' Let me give it a try.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' What can he do? This requires precision, not smashing.
:'''Rex:''' Hmm.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' We can use Salvatore. Look, Volkov, Rex may not look like much, but having him here, he may actually save us.
:'''Rex:''' Thanks for the vote of confidence.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Dr. Holiday leads Rex away. Quietly to Rex]'' If you blow it, we're dead. Got it? Start with the couplings and see if we can use the solar arrays to generate any power.
:'''Rex:''' How's the robot, uh...?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's voice activated. Salvatore, pick up those yellow coupling cables.
:'''Rex:''' How's that feel?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Slightly less catastrophic, thank you.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' No. No computers. If Zag-RS is somehow still in there--
:'''Pete Volkov:''' How do we stabilize this station without gyroscopic control of the thruster jets?
:'''Rex:''' ''[as Rex is space walking]'' Pretty incredible up here, isn't it, guys?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Aside from the imminent doom, yes. Awe-inspiring.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, the thrusters are normally controlled through the navigation software. I need you to bypass the system and connect the thrusters directly to the command module.
:'''Rex:''' I can't reach the thruster from here without-- Hold on to this, will you, Salvatore?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Are you sure you know what you're doing?
:'''Rex:''' Not a clue. Try the controls now. Reel me in, Sally. Salvatore? Okay. Fire it up!
:'''Pete Volkov:''' We might have a tiny chance of getting out of your life. Altitude burn in three, two, one.
:''[Pete Volkov scoffs]''
:'''Pete Volkov:''' There must have been a fuel leak in the collision.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' At least we're stable enough for an evac now. Rex, take Salvatore and retrieve the containment unit. We'll prep the escape capsule.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Is this a bad time to observe there's only two seats in the escape capsule and three of us?
:'''Rex:''' Easy. You can sit on the floor, Volkov. Too bad we can't take sparky with. I could really go for a robo-butler.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Talk with Knight when we get home. I think we can go now.
:'''Rex:''' Unh!
:'''Zag-RS:''' Correction. Now I can go. You were right to shut the station down. I would have regained control if you hadn't. Fortunately, I was able to download myself into something autonomous.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' That is our only means of survival! You can't take it!
:'''Zag-RS:''' Incorrect.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Unh!
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Be careful-- The hull!
:'''Rex:''' Sorry, professor, but this requires smashing, not precision. Aah! Get to the capsule!
:''[Rex groaning]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah!
:'''Zag-RS:''' It seems you've forgotten my ability to destroy nanites at close range, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' Unh! Thanks for the reminder. Unh!
:'''Pete Volkov:''' ''[to Dr. Holiday]'' Why worry about hitting the atmosphere? These two will get us first.
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Hey, trying to stop a killer robot over here. &quot;Thanks&quot; or &quot;Keep it up&quot; would do fine! Unh!
:'''Zag-RS:''' To defeat me, you'll have to destroy the station and everyone on board. But I did enjoy stabilizing the station with you. Please exit the capsule now.
:'''Rex:''' Forget stable. Unh!
:'''Dr. Holiday and Volkov:''' Unh!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, come on!
:'''Rex:''' Can't... do it. I'm spent. Go! Launch while you can.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Not till you're in here!
:'''Rex:''' You got the nanites. If anyone can figure out how to make'em work, it's you. You won't even need me anymore. I'll hold her off!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Launch!
:''[Dr. Holiday grunts]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Dr. Holiday throws the nanites at Zag RS. Then Holiday runs up to Rex]'' Rex, you never gave up on us. We're not giving up on you. Now get in here so we can go home!
:'''Zag-RS:''' This is not... over.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, it is for now.
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Engaging stabilizers. The heat shield is damaged. It appears we are going to die... again.
:'''Rex:''' I got your heat shield... right here! Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot! Oh-ho! Hot! Hot! Hot! Aah!
:'''White Knight:''' Shut it down.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Providence, this is Holiday. We're clear of re-entry and deploying parachute. Think you could arrange a pickup?
:'''Six:''' On its way. You'll be happy to know we're in contact with Rhodes. Their spacesuit saved her. We're prepping a shuttle now.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Thanks. And Six-- It's good to hear your voice.
:'''Rex:''' Listen, doc. About up there, just before we got away from the robot--
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' After you came all that way to get me, it's the least I could do.
:'''Rex:''' So, how long until we get picked up?
:'''Pete Volkov:''' Bad news. Transponder is toast.
:'''Rex:''' Ha! You two better not get seasick.

===What Lies Beneath===
: '''Circe:''' Rex, it's me.
: '''Rex:''' Circe? What do ''you'' want!?
: '''Circe:''' Things in Abysus- they're bad, Rex. I need your help.
: '''Rex:''' Oh, well, how do I put this nicely? Not a chance! You made your choice, Circe! I made mine. End of story.
: '''Circe:''' Please, Rex. I know you're mad at me, but this is a matter of life and death.
: '''Rex:''' A lot of things are right now. Nice talking to you.
: '''Circe:''' Rex!?
: (''Looks crestfallen'')
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I didn't know you were still in touch with Circe.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, me neither. Can we please stop talking about this?
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Holiday:''' She's very pretty.
: '''Rex:''' She works for Van Kleiss. She's the enemy. 
: '''Holiday:''' But you still like her, don't you?
: '''Rex:''' I am ''not'' talking about this!
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' Rex, thank you.
: '''Rex:''' I'm not doing this for you. But...your welcome. (''Circe similes hopefully'') So what exactly am I supposed to do?
:'''Holiday:''' When I said you were the key, I meant that literally. According to the plans, the machine needs to be turned on by a molecular level. 
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' You ''lied'' to me!!
: '''Circe:''' You wouldn't have come if I told you the truth.
: '''Rex:''' This wasn't about you needing ''me''!! This is about you needing Van Kleiss!!
: '''Circe:''' I need you both. Please, Rex, you don't understand.
: '''Rex:''' No!! ''You'' don't understand!! Van Kleiss is gone and I intend to keep it that way!!
: '''Biowulf:''' You destroyed us all!!
: '''Six:''' Don't even breathe.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Circe:''' You don't know what you've done.
: '''Rex:''' Then, I guess we're even.
: '''Circe:''' You've never understood his power. Van Kleiss kept us safe here. His force was the only thing keeping Abysus together, and you destroyed that.
: '''Rex:''' We're done here!!
: '''Holiday:''' Rex, I think she's right. Nanites operate on a molecular level. If they bonded with Van Kleiss, breaking off his connection must have caused a splinter; resulting in a disastrous chain reaction.
: '''Rex:''' I'm ''not'' bringing him back! ''Not now, not ever!!'' Besides, you don't need Van Kleiss! You have me!! Why not go straight to the source?!
:'''Holiday:''' Rex, no!
:'''Six:''' Stand down! It's too dangerous!
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' Let go of me!!
: '''Holiday:''' If you keep fighting these unstable nanites, they're going to destroy you!
: '''Rex:''' And if I don't they'll destroy everybody else.
: '''Holiday:''' Not if you listen to me! I have an idea. It's a long shot. Instead of fighting the nanites, ''communicate'' with them.
: '''Six:''' You want to talk to the nanites?
: '''Holiday:''' He's done it before.
: '''Rex:''' Never anything this big.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' I got you! Don't let go!! (''Rex struggles to save Circe from falling as she clings to him; tears fill her eyes''). ''Circe!!'' (''as she falls into the black goop of highly unstable nanites'')
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' ''Circe!'' Six! Dr. Holiday! Okay, you win. (''technopathically starts the machine''). Something's...not right.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' Circe! Come on, breathe!
: '''Circe''' (''coughs weakly'')''':''' Hey.
: '''Rex:''' Hey.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Rex:''' Stay with us, Circe. Van Kleiss is done.
: '''Circe:''' As much as I care about you, Rex, Van Kleiss and the Pack are my family. They took me in when no one else would. I can't abandon them.
: '''Rex:''' So that's it. We're always going to be on opposite sides.
: '''Circe:''' It does keep it interesting.

===The Swarm===
:'''Rex''' (thinking'')''':''' ''Gotta stay under. Not sure I can...make it.
:(''Has visions of those most dear to him: Noah, his crush Circe, Holiday, Six, Bobo)

===Basic===
===The Plague===
:'''White Knight:''' The country was infected in three hours. The entire North American continent was asleep in five. All satellites are offline and there's been no communication from overseas. The Plague hit Providence before quarantine protocols could be established. Dr. Holiday has managed to keep herself awake using electric neural stimulation. EVOs seem to be immune to the Plague, which leaves us with only one agent left to deal with this mess.
:'''Rex:''' Ugh! This is gonna be a... long day.
:'''White Knight:''' It's gonna be the last stop for those commuters  if you can't catch that train.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, I know. But I gotta find it first. Huh? Uh, found it. Ughh! Whoa! Ugh!
:'''White Knight:''' Rex, report.
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' Mission accomplished. I'm heading back to the lab. Oh, man. I'm gonna be sore for weeks.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' ''[Sighing]'' Oh. This is seriously wearing me out. Come on, Rex. Pull it together. Ugh!
:'''White Knight:''' Dr. Holiday is heading to the initial outbreak area now. She's come up short as to any way of reversing the Plague. I'm counting on her solving this before the electric shocks damage her brain beyond usefulness.
:''[Rex yawns loudly]''
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' This is like spitting on a forest fire. Things are probably going wrong in every city on Earth.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Every life saved counts, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, I know. How are Six and Bobo? But Bobo's an EVO.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Same as the others, asleep. He should have been immune like you.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I-I don't have a clue about this thing.
:''[Dr. Holiday gets shocked]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Ugh! And these shocks won't keep me awake forever.
:'''White Knight:''' All the more reason not to waste any more time!
:'''Rex:''' She's not wasting time!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' No, he's right. We've got sixty hours at best before people start dying of thirst.
:'''White Knight:''' And hundred or so will die within the hour if the downtown fire spreads any further.
:'''Rex:''' ''[Sighs]'' Oh. Back to work.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Something told billions of viruses to evolve into a sleeping Plague. The key to solving this is finding Patient Zero.
:'''White Knight:''' Get up to the Cayuga dam now. The floodgates are closed. It'll crack if you don't relieve the pressure.
:'''Rex:''' So, how do we find Patient Zero?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' That's not going to be so easy.
:'''Rex:''' Huh? Whoa! Ugh! Oh, come on! Hope you like fish sticks for dinner, doc.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' If we can find the frequency that connected Patient Zero to the nanites, we can trace it back to him.
:'''Rex:''' Fantastic. I find Patient Zero, shut him down, and, boom, everybody wakes up ready for breakfast.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Yes. No. I mean, maybe. Ugh, I'm so tired. I can't think.
:''[Dr. Holiday gets shocked]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Ugh! And these stupid shocks.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Maybe I should be studying Bobo instead.
:'''Rex:''' Easy, doc. Deep breaths. Is there anything I can do?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Oof. Lost it there. I'm okay. I modified this scanner to find the nanite control frequency.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' But it could take hours.
:'''White Knight:''' Dr. Holiday, where's my update?
:'''Rex:''' Do you really think she'd keep it a secret if she found something? She's been working around the clock.
:'''White Knight:''' And that's the way it's going to be until we figure this out.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Just give me a moment. ''[Sleepily]'' I can find the--
:'''Rex:''' Doc! Doc!
:'''White Knight:''' ''[after Holiday passes out]'' That's great. She couldn't stay awake an hour or two more?
:'''Rex:''' At least she was working on the problem.
:'''White Knight:''' She's doing her job. Which is what I expect from both of you. Where are you going?
:'''Rex:''' To Follow Doc's plan.
:''[the door closes]''
:'''Rex:''' You can stay there and decide if you're good for anything besides yelling at people.
:''[Rex breathes heavily]''
:'''White Knight:''' We're down to eighteen hours before we start losing people.
:'''Rex:''' Like I don't know that?
:'''White Knight:''' What's the holdup?
:'''Rex:''' I just need a second.
:'''White Knight:''' If you can't handle this--
:'''Rex:''' What are you gonna do-- Shuffle some papers at me? I'm all you've got, so back off!
:''[Ends the transmission]''
:'''White Knight:''' You are not that special, kid. And there is way too much at stake now. White Knight protocols. Code designation-- Iron Mace Alpha. Commence systems check. Confirm nanite shielding integrity. Put a hustle on, hotshot. Once it's dark, it'll be harder to find anything.
:'''Rex:''' Fine! You want speed?
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Ugh! Ugh. Hey, freak face. The buffet is closed.
:''[Rex breathes heavily]''
:'''Rex:''' I can't. I can't do this by myself any more.
:'''White Knight:''' [Arriving] You don't have to.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa. Nice suit.
:'''White Knight:''' Thrill me.
:'''Rex:''' White Knight out of the office? This really is the end of the world.
:'''White Knight:''' I'm trying to prevent that.
:'''Rex:''' This isn't exactly a desk job. Think you can keep up?
:'''White Knight:''' I'll manage.
:'''Rex:''' Okay. But as my sidekick, you need to have a cool name. How about &quot;Gizmodude&quot;? No, no, no. How about &quot;Robopants&quot;?
:'''White Knight:''' Anything? Before they went offline, the satellites showed that the Plague started in this area. Patient Zero is somewhere down there.
:'''Rex:''' What do you want me to do, go door to door like I'm looking for a little lost puppy?
:'''White Knight:''' If we don't find and neutralize the source of the Plague, we'll need to take drastic measures.
:'''Rex:''' The &quot;Make you glow in the dark&quot; kind? Come on. Pass. Maybe we can narrow our search. He's Patient Zero, right? The first one sick. So, maybe he was already at a doctor's office or a hospital.
:'''White Knight:''' The keep's records show eight clinics, two major hospitals, and eighty-two general practitioners.
:'''Rex:''' See? Now we're getting somewhere. Try and keep up.
:'''White Knight:''' I don't know how Six does it.
:'''Rex:''' Huh? Ugh! Ah! Aah!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Sorry. Won't happen again. I'm-- I'm-- I'm fine.
:'''White Knight:''' Take five. You're useless to me as a zombie.
:'''Rex:''' No, don't want to slow things... up. Okay, okay, I'm awake! Make up your mind.
:'''White Knight:''' It's not me.
:'''Rex:''' It found the frequency! Ooh, looks like a tight fit. Someone needs to lay off the milkshakes. I got it covered. You have serious control issues. Wait here. Interesting. Huh. Don't be surprised if you get a bill for that. I think this is the virus.
:'''White Knight:''' Viruses are too small to see.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, but it's an EVO virus, remember? I'd say we've got the right place. It's still changing. I don't think he's finished going EVO.
:'''White Knight:''' All right. Get to it.
:'''Rex:''' Let's hope this guy is curable.
:''[Rex gasps]''
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' What? Uh, I don't get it. It's working but it's not. He just heals. What are you doing?
:'''White Knight:''' We're out of options.
:'''Rex:''' No! I'm trying to cure him!
:'''White Knight:''' And failing. Back up.
:'''Rex:''' But, Dr. Holiday--
:'''White Knight:''' Is not here. She said he was the key. You tried your way, it didn't work.
:'''Rex:''' You're not doing this!
:'''White Knight:''' It's not up for debate.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' If you vaporize him and it doesn't work, we've got no Chance to reverse this Plague.
:'''White Knight:''' And you're suddenly the genius that's gonna figure it out? We have only hours before people start dying. Now move aside.
:'''Rex:''' No. Stop it, Knight, before these people get hurt.
:'''White Knight:''' Just as soon as you step away.
:'''Rex:''' Aah! ''[about Knight's armored suit]'' That wasn't built to fight EVOs. That was built to fight me!
:'''White Knight:''' It's for our own protection.
:'''Rex:''' Well, let's see how well it works. You've never trusted me.
:'''White Knight:''' I don't trust anything with nanites.
:'''Rex:''' Everything has nanites!
:''[Rex strains]''
:'''White Knight:''' Eveything but me.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa!
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''White Knight:''' Didn't you ever wonder why I live in a sterilized box? That's why I run Providence. I can't be corrupted. I'll never evolve into some freak that betrays his team. I'm the only one that can be trusted.
:'''Rex:''' Well, here's the update, Knight-- Everybody on the planet has nanites-- Everybody but you. That makes me normal. You're the freak. You are unbelievable.
:'''White Knight:''' I'm ready to hear your theories, doctor.
:'''Rex:''' Still? What, I gotta do this a piece at a time? Okay.
:'''White Knight:''' Should've let me take him out when I still could.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, well, maybe if I devolve enough pieces of his armor, you'll get a decent shot in.
:'''White Knight:''' Get to it.
:'''Rex:''' Hmm. Wait. Pieces. It's lots of pieces. It's working, but on the wrong EVO. That's not Patient Zero, that's the virus. Patient Zero was under all that gross stuff. The outside part is mutating to defend him. He's commanding the viruses to protect him. The Plague was his first offense! 
:'''White Knight:''' How does this help us?
:'''Rex:''' Just like Holiday said, Patient Zero is the key. I get his nanites to send out a wake-up call, then Kieran.
:'''White Knight:''' And how are you gonna get to him under all that?
:'''Rex:''' I need that thing to eat me. Yeah, I know. The crazy thing is, it's the second time I've done this today. Do it! Aah.
:'''Computer:''' Suit integrity compromised. Nanite breach imminent. Suit integrity re-established.
:'''Rex:''' ''[From inside the EVO]'' What's going on out there? You have to keep it still.
:'''White Knight:''' Right. Next time, I'll let it kill me.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Okay. This shouldn't be hard. Ugh!
:''[Rex spits]''
:'''Rex:''' Ugh!
:''[Patient Zero gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' No! I'm not trying to hurt you.
:'''Computer:''' Suit integrity compromised. Nanite breach imminent.
:''[Rex strains]''
:'''Rex:''' Just calm down! Nobody's going to hurt you. You're safe. Time to wake them up.
:'''Computer:''' Suit integrity compromised. Nanite breach imminent. Suit integrity compromised. Nanite breach imminent.
:''[White Knight groans]''
:'''White Knight:''' Doctor, where's my update?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Still waiting on casualty reports. Of course, there would have been a lot more if it hadn't been for Rex.
:'''White Knight:''' It's his job, isn't it? What about the monkey?
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Still asleep.
:'''White Knight:''' Get on that. If this gives us a viral weapon against EVOs, we can put this week in the plus column.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' You got him in time. Still 100% nanite-free. I'm surprised you saved him.
:'''Rex:''' In a weird way, White Knight and I are sort of alike. We're both one-of-a-kind. And that's worth something.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I'm proud of you, Rex-- Not just for this, but for figuring everything out.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, sure. You know, it was, uh, pretty obvious.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Now, if we could only figure out what went wrong with Bobo. I'm worried the virus may have triggered a permanent reaction.
:''[Bobo yawns]''
:'''Bobo:''' Boy, those guys in the motor pool sure know how to party. Whoa. How long was I out? And I'm starving! Who's up for breakfast? Good night, Bobo.

===Promises, Promises===
:''Note:'' This episode depicts how young Rex had joined Providence via Six's [[w:flashback episode|memories]].
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:''[Six narrates over imagery of the Nanite Event.]''
:'''Six:'''	The names and faces may change, but no matter how you slice it, war is war. You pick a side and you don’t look back. I believe that now and I believed it then. What gets you in trouble is when you start second guessing. Forget what you’re fighting for and you’re finished.
:'''Diane Farrah:''' ''[Panicked screaming is heard in the background of an EVO attack]'' There’s another entity has emerged, this time in the heart of Paris. Authorities are vastly unprepared. Unless a decisive response to this pandemic is marshalled, the city will fall just as Kiev— ''[Diane Farrah gets snatched by the EVO’s web]''
:''[A Providence assault vehicle rams through police cars, from which Six appears and deals with the EVO.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Save some for me partner! How else am I gonna earn my paycheck?
:''[Knight fires off a weapon and the scene cuts to present day at Providence Headquarters.]''
:'''Providence Agents:''' Surprise!
:'''Rex:'''	So, the flu shots?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I needed an excuse to get you here. We’ll do them after cake. I’ll get you Van Kleiss! ''[Holiday swings at a pinata blindfolded before Rex crushes it with his smack hands]''
:'''Rex:''' Sorry, Doc, it was taking too long. And it was either that or throw some of your cake at it.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Holiday walks over to Six at a corner, passing him a drink]'' You’re looking festive.
:'''Six:''' It was an odd choice to pick today to be his birthday.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It is the anniversary of his new life here. He deserves a celebration, he changed everything.
:'''Six:''' Has he?
:'''Rex:''' ''[Rex jumps onto a counter, speaking to the agents surrounding him]'' Ha-hah! How about hitting The Petting Zoo for a little pin-the-tail on the raging “Rhinocesaurus”?
:'''Dr. Holiday and Six:''' No.
:'''Rex:'''	Every party has a pooper. And I got two.
:'''Providence Agents:''' ''[Providence Agents turn off the lights and bring Rex a birthday cake]'' Happy Birthday!
:'''Rex:'''	Dudes!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' You should be celebrating too, Six! After all, you’re the one who started this. In a way, it’s your birthday too.
:''[Flashback to Six and Knight walking through the Petting Zoo during construction of Providence HQ.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Nyquist. Fortier. How’s the monkey business?
:'''Nyquist:''' Ha ha-larious, Knight.
:'''Fortier:''' Hey, for your information we probably saved the world today.
:'''White Knight:''' I, for one, feel safer already.
:''[Knight states, looking at Bobo while Six walks towards his cage]''
:'''Bobo:''' So, green man. We meet again!
:'''Calan:''' They found him at the Kremlin this time. He was threatening to push the button unless someone brought him a thousand pounds of caviar.
:'''Bobo:''' Chimp’s gotta eat.
:'''Fortier:''' What about your little bug hunt? Give you much trouble?
:'''White Knight:''' Nothing we couldn’t handle.
:''[The EVO is transported in a cage overhead while Knight and Six walk through a hallway.]''
:'''White Knight:''' What? Not even a smile? Oh by the way, happy birthday. ''[Knight passes Six a gift]''
:'''Six:''' How did you know?
:'''White Knight:''' I’m your partner. Can’t keep much from me.
:'''Six:''' Thanks.
:'''White Knight:''' So what crawled up your coat?
:'''Six:''' I’m getting tired of all this fighting. Did you see how many there are now? Are we gonna cage the whole world?
:'''White Knight:''' ''[Knight turns around, placing a hand on Six's shoulder]'' We’re preserving the human race. ''[The door to the processing facility opens]'' Besides, who says we’re gonna cage them all?
:'''Dr. Fell:''' ''[Looking at the EVO]'' And to think, this was once spinning webs in someone’s garden. Doctor Holiday, prepare for disassembly. ''[Doctor Holiday nods and activates the procedure as per his instructions. Doctor Fell sports a wicked smile during the experiment before it disintegrates the EVO without a trace]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It’s the same exact data as last time, and the time before that; Doctor Fell, why aren’t we studying them in a natural setting?
:'''Dr. Fell:''' Only through molecular dissection will we find a way to expunge this threat. The committee agrees with me on this. If you do not approve, I can always find another assistant.
:'''White Knight:''' ''[Doctor Holiday leaves the facility in frustration with Doctor Fell]'' Bleeding hearts. They’ll get us all killed one day.
:''[Holiday walks down a hallway and drops several notes, one of which Six picks up.]''
:'''Six:''' EVO?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Exponentially Variegated Organism; a little more scientific than spoiled meat. That is what you hired guns call them isn’t it?
:'''Six:''' It's Six, and I don't use guns. You told Fell we could learn more by bringing them in alive. What did you mean?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The nanites are altering our DNA, but with the right type of research, there's no doubt they could be programmed to stop or reverse the process. Imagine a third option to this, kill-or-Contain protocol.
:'''Six:''' A third option?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' A cure.
:'''White Knight:''' ''[Knight and several other Providence agents run past Holiday after an alarm activates]'' Buckle up partner! Looks like we got ourselves a big one.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Hopeless.
:''[Providence mercenaries arrive at Mexico to confront the giant mechanical EVO.]''
:'''White Knight:''' What are we looking at?
:'''Dr. Fell:''' ''[Speaking through a monitor]'' Fascinating. It appears to be bio-mechanical. I must have a closer look at this one.
:'''White Knight:''' One for the trophy case.
:'''Six:''' Wait. We may get more out of this one if we bring it in alive!
:'''White Knight:''' Are you nuts?
:'''Fortier:''' Looks like your boy is losing his edge, Knight!
:'''White Knight:''' Not a cage in the world that can hold this thing. Six? ''[Six charges at the EVO, making his way up the limbs before stabbing it in the shoulder]'' That’s more like it!
:'''Six:''' ''[After his attack, Six gets grabbed by the EVO’s hand]'' White, get back! This thing is going to blow! ''[Six is launched and emerges from the rubble before the EVO self-destructs]'' Knight? Knight!
:'''Rex:''' ¡Auxílio! ''[Six runs to a child buried underneath the same pile of rubble]'' ¿Has visto mi bicicleta?
:''[Commercial break]''
:''[Six and Rex stay close to the walls of buildings in the quiet city.]''
:'''Rex:''' Is that sword for real? Are you a ninja? I was speaking Spanish. Is this Mexico? Why are we sneaking around-- ''[Six covers Rex’s mouth at the sound of an Evo from a distance]'' Ugh, dude, your hand smells like monkey breath.
:''[Rex pulls Six's hand off his face.]''
:'''Rex:''' Why don’t you just call HQ or NORAD or 9-1-1?
:'''Six:''' When the creature blew, it released some sort of EM pulse. Fried everything electronic: this area is a dead-zone. We’re on our own.
:'''Rex:''' So much for ordering a pizza. ''[Six stares at Rex in silence]'' I’m joking cause if I don’t, I’m gonna remember how scared I am right now-- ''[Rex looks away and then back at Six while trying to recollect his memories]'' Actually except for my name, that’s about all I do remember.
:'''Six:''' No family? An address? A grandma where I can dump you?
:''[Rex shakes his head to all of Six’s questions]''
:'''Rex:''' Nothing. Except waking up and seeing your face. Not exactly the angel I was hoping for.
:'''Six:''' You’re in shock. We should find a place to hole you up until I can get some help.
:'''Rex:''' No way, I’m not hiding! Why, you wanna get rid of me?
:'''Six:''' I screwed up, and it may very well have caused my friend his life. The last thing I need is you slowing me down.
:''[Six carries Rex through the remains of a building before stumbling across a massive crater.]''
:'''Six:''' No--
:'''Rex:''' ''[Rex walks away from Six's hold to get closer to the crater]'' What’s going on? What did this?
:'''Six:''' Don’t worry, we evacuated this zone. We’ll get you home, I promise. Right now we gotta move.
:'''Rex:''' What’s making those sounds?
:'''Six:''' ''[While navigating through the area, an EVO crawls out a ditch and roars at the pair]'' New plan! Run! ''[Six draws his blade as the EVO charges at him, lunges in the air, and spits acid which causes him to double over in pain. Rex nearly escapes after climbing over rubble, but stops when he sees the monster towering over Six]''
:'''Rex:''' Agh! Leave him alone! ''[Rex charges at the EVO to protect Six, accidentally curing the man after striking his palm at him]'' Ugh, great! I probably got rabies! ''[Six looks at Rex in shock]'' What?
:''[Later, at the Petting Zoo.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Glad to see you alive, partner.
:'''Six:''' Happy to accommodate.
:'''White Knight:''' Better stand clear of Fell. He’s furious we didn’t bring back a sample of that monster.
:'''Rex:''' ''[The sound of a cage opening turns the men’s attention to Rex, who was tricked into freeing a desperate-looking Bobo]'' Uh, no, I don’t know where they keep the jet planes.
:'''Six:''' ''[Bobo runs away but is immediately caught and thrown back into the cage by Six]'' Why did you let him out?
:'''Rex:''' He asked me to. I don’t know if you guys are aware of this, but that monkey talks!
:'''White Knight:''' ''[Knight takes hold of Rex’s shirt and pins him against a cage]'' Who are you? What are you doing in here?
:'''Six:''' ''[Six pulls Rex away and positions himself between Knight and Rex]'' He’s with me, I found him out in the field. There’s something I wanted to show-- ''[The lights and sounds of an experiment draws Six’s attention]'' Doctor Holiday.
:''[Six and Rex begin walking to Doctor Holiday’s laboratory where Rex gets a checkup from the Doctor.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Ouch! Ah! Let me see your medical license.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Six, we have nurses who could’ve easily handled this. ''[Six opens a cage containing an EVO and secures it in a hold while bringing it closer to Rex]'' What are you doing? That EVO is scheduled for processing!
:'''Six:''' Show her. ''[On Six's command, Rex cures the EVO]'' We found it Doctor. The third alternative.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' What is he...? How--
:'''Six:''' Meet Rex. The cure.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Rex waves at Holiday before she runs to Six and embraces him with a hug]'' This changes everything!
:''[Rex is put to bed and Six waits for Doctor Holiday outside the quarters.]''
:'''Six:''' Finally asleep?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Amazing what fifteen burritos will do. I can’t wait to see Fell’s face when we show him.
:'''Six:''' No. Not a word to anyone. Tomorrow we move him to a safe location.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' But I need to get to work on him straight away.
:'''Six:''' Trust me, not everyone will feel the same way about working with an EVO. If we time this wrong, it could turn ugly.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I hate this war.
:''[Doctor Holiday walks away while Knight stands around the corner, having overheard the entire conversation.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Hey, partner. How’s Tricks?
:'''Six:''' What are you doing in the medical ward? I thought you hated germs.
:'''White Knight:''' Made an exception today. Something I should know?
:'''Six:''' Just another day at the office. ''[Knight holds on to Six’s arm before he can move any further away]''
:'''White Knight:''' You can trust me.
:'''Six:''' I know.
:''[Six walks away while Knight looks suspiciously at Rex’s door. Later in his own room, Six practices his swordsmanship and inspects Knight’s gift before contacting Holiday about a power surge.]''
:'''Six:''' Holiday. Is Fell running protocols at night now? Holiday?
:''[White Knight is present alongside Dr. Fell at a processing facility where an experiment is conducted]'' Prepare for disassembly.
:'''Six:''' ''[Before any further action can be taken, Six enters the facility]'' What are you doing?
:'''White Knight:''' I’m not going to allow my partner to risk his career for one bad call. Did you think I couldn’t get Holiday to talk?
:'''Dr. Fell:''' ''[Six walks towards the table where a drowsy Rex is suspended before having Fell block his path]'' You're letting your emotions cloud your judgement, Six. With what we gleam from this boy, I could create tools that would inoculate the world.
:'''Six:''' Why risk it? He can already cure them! I've seen it!
:'''White Knight:''' So, what, we train him? Make him one of us? ''[Doctor Fell tries to dissect Rex with a scalpel before the tool is destroyed by a strand of his nanites]'' I thought he was sedated!
:'''Dr. Fell:''' He is. It’s his nanites, they’re protecting him! ''[A single, premature version of his Smack Hands is created and tosses Fell to the ground. Various forms of Rex’s signature builds materialize and disappear to Rex’s discomfort]''
:'''White Knight:''' One of us, huh?
:''[Knight activates a warning siren while Rex inadvertently draws electricity from his surroundings]''
:''[Commercial break]''
:'''Rex:''' Okay, this is definitely not normal.
:'''White Knight:''' Enough of this! ''[Knight fires a bullet at Rex which is sliced in half by Six’s katana]'' Have you lost it? He’s one of them! If he powers up he’ll destroy us all!
:''[Knight fires another bullet at Rex]''
:'''Six:''' No!
:'''White Knight:''' ''[Six deflects the second bullet, this time aiming the projectile near Knight’s head]'' So. That’s it, huh?
:''[Knight proceeds to rain bullets on Six who deflects all of the shots while charging towards him. Meanwhile, Holiday is held captive inside one of the cages at The Petting Zoo.]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' You cannot treat me like this! I have 3 PhDs! Let me out this instant! ''[She slumps inside of the cage next to Bobo, who swipes a pen which he proceeds to lockpick with]''
:'''Bobo:''' Y’know, maybe we can scratch each other's backs.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Excuse me?
:''[Bobo unlocks the gate, with Holiday seizing the opportunity and hurrying to reach Rex]''
:'''Bobo:''' Right between the shoulder blades. And watch the nails. ''[Holiday looks down at Bobo before proceeding to run back to Fell’s facility]'' You thought I was kidding about the back scratch? I got monkey dander!
:''[Back at the processing facility, Rex reels in pain while Knight continues to fire at his partner.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Stand down, Six! ''[Knight stops firing at Six]'' We need you in this war!
:'''Six:''' What’s the good in winning a war if we can’t live with ourselves after?
:'''White Knight:''' ''[Knight tears the strap off his gun and uses it as an improvised baton while continuing to make combat with Six. The two exchange blows until Knight gains the upper hand and wails on him until they both stand before Rex]'' We're supposed to be friends! He's a monster! What do you see in him?!
:''[Knight pulls up Six’s head towards Rex who is seizing in pain]''
:'''Six:''' Hope.
:''[Six draws blood with a strike and continues to fight Knight until he is tranquilized by Doctor Fell]''
:'''White Knight:''' Thanks for talking some sense into him, doc.
:''[Knight picks up Six’s katana and walks toward Rex]''
:'''Rex:''' What-- What’s happening to me?
:''[Rex pleas to Knight, who simply looks down at him before warning sirens go off and the facility begins to lockdown]''
:'''Dr. Fell:''' We’re all going to burn.
:''[Fell escapes while Rex is craned away by Holiday on an upper level]''
:'''White Knight:''' No! ''[Knight looks back at Six who is slowly picking himself up while the remaining exits close off. In a last ditch effort, Knight carries Six and throws him through the final set of doors before they seal shut]''
:'''Six:'''	''[Six picks himself and slams his fist against the glass]'' Why?
:'''White Knight:''' I know what side I’m on. ''[Knight proudly states before getting consumed by a blinding white light and screaming in agony]''
:'''Six:'''	''[Grabbing a hold of Dr. Fell's collar Six shouts]'' Do something!
:'''Dr. Fell:''' Once the cycle starts it's impossible to shut down.
:'''Rex:'''	''[Contrary to Dr. Fell's statement, the light fades away and the electricity is subdued after Rex interfaces with a control panel]'' Impossible? Psh, right.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' How did you—-?
:'''Rex:''' Told it to turn off. And it did! Wait, where...where am I?
:'''Dr. Fell:''' ''[Speaking through a monitor]'' Doctor Holiday. Maybe you were right.
:'''Dr. Holiday:'''	Maybe you should start looking for another job.
:'''Bobo:''' ''[Within the processing chamber, Knight takes a few steps forward before collapsing]'' Hey marshmallow! Nice look! ''[Knight looks back up at Bobo with his signature bleached appearance]''
:''[Some time later, in his office White Knight speaks to Six through a monitor.]''
:'''White Knight:''' How’s the training?
:'''Six:'''	Slow.
:'''White Knight:''' Not all you hoped he’d be? ''[Rex and Bobo topple each other in a play fight while Knight continues to monologue in his office]'' Still, who would’ve thought the kinder, gentler approach would do such wonders for our profile. The notion of a cure has gotten Providence funding, and worldwide prestige. The committee's happy. Your new partner may just be the best thing this operation could have asked for. Funny, isn’t it? Because of you I can never leave this chamber. I’m now the only pure human left in the world. And the perfect poster boy to run this operation. I suppose I should thank you.
:'''Six:''' I promised him that we would help uncover his past; find his family.
:'''White Knight:''' Whatever keeps him on his leash. But if he shows the slightest sign of turning into thing again, it's all on you.
:''[Back at the party in the present, Noah is pinned down by Bobo with a bag on his head to Rex’s amusement.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Hoo-hoo-hoo! Oh my—hold him down, I’ll get the camera!
:''[Rex runs to his room, and after a quick search he instead finds a long box on a corner shelf]''
:'''Six:''' Happy birthday.
:''[Six walks into his room, officially greeting Rex]''
:'''Rex:'''	From you? For me? You gotta be kidding.
:'''Six:''' You, your work. It has made a real difference. I just—-
:'''Rex:'''	Yeah, I know I’m pretty great! But seriously get off the sap train, Six. It’s creeping me out. ''[Rex opens the gift to reveal the blade inside]'' Wow, Six! Thank you!
:'''Six:'''	It’s called a tanto. It’s the ceremonial blade of a samurai warrior.
:'''Rex:'''	Samurai? Awesome.
:'''Six:'''	''[Six unsheathes his own tanto and holds it against Rex’s]'' This is its twin.
:'''Rex:'''	''[Rex removes the cap from his tanto and squints at the symbol etched into the blade]'' Is that... writing?
:'''Six:'''	Bushido symbol of loyalty. It means whether for good or ill, our fates will follow the same path. This one stays with me.
:'''Rex:'''	Think this thing can cut through Holiday’s chocolate cake?
:'''Six:'''	''[Six raises an eyebrow]'' Anything’s possible.
:''[Rex puts the cap back on to the blade and camera cuts to outside of Providence headquarters, panning outward until screen fades to black.]''

===Badlands===
:'''Rex:''' We're facing heavy resistance here! There are too many of them!
:''[Rex imitates gunfire]''
:'''Six:''' Keep this channel clear.
:'''Rex:''' Six, do you really expect us to get to back to Providence by one thousand eight hundred hours in this slowpoke convoy? Just get the cargo, will you? We'd be there by now.
:'''Six:''' Except we're transporting unstable nanites, which have to be kept at or below sea level. Even one wrong bump and the whole thing could go off.
:'''Rex:''' And if it blows, you're in a battle transport. Meanwhile, we're stuck in this delivery truck, carrying whatever. What are we carrying anyway?
:'''Bobo:''' Toilet paper.
:'''Six:''' One, everyone in this mission has a part to play.
:'''Rex:''' Seriously?! Toilet paper?!
:'''Six:''' And, two, we're under strict radio silence. Six out.
:'''Rex:''' Radio silence, convoy security protocols, scheduled bathroom breaks, and they won't even let me drive. So many rules all for what-- Some nanites?
:'''Noah:''' Unstable nanites-- The most dangerous nanites on Earth.
:'''Rex:''' Well, at least there's not an anti-tunes order!
:'''Noah:''' That radio's ancient. You'll be lucky if you can get it to play static. 
:'''Rex:''' Oh, I think I can manage to crank some bass out of it.
:'''Noah:''' Not bad!
:'''Rex:''' What?!
:'''Noah:''' I said, &quot;Not bad!&quot;
:''[Bobo gasps]''
:''[Rex, Noah and Bobo coughing]''
:'''Noah:''' Bobo, slow down! We can't see anything!
:''[Bobo sputters]''
:'''Bobo:''' I got one good eye that's closed half the time, and now you're worried?!
:''[Rex, Noah and Bobo coughing]''
:'''Noah:''' And we lost the convoy.
:'''Bobo:''' Relax, blondie. We'll catch up. That's why they invented speeding.
:'''Gatlocke:''' ''[British accent]'' Good-- They're right on time. What do you think of the spyglass? Am I taking this pirate thing too far? I haven't become cliché, have I?
:'''Gang Punk:''' No, Gatlocke. It fits you.
:'''Gatlocke:''' Oh, good! Because if you'd said, &quot;yes&quot;, I would have thrown you off the cliff.
:''[Gatlocke chuckles evilly]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' No, seriously, I would have. Ladies and gentlemen, the convoy is directly beneath us! Wait. Do we have any ladies in my gang? No ladies? We need to get with the times! Let's see about getting some ladies in the gang. Gentlemen, grab your weapons, charge up the scramblers, and attack!
:'''Providence Agent:''' They're jamming all channels. We're cut off, sir.
:'''Gatlocke:''' Ready the ion-cannon thingumabobs!
:'''Six:''' Fall back! Cover the cargo carriers!
:'''Rex:''' You know what this means, don't you?
:'''Noah:''' We're lost?
:'''Rex:''' No. It means no one is around to tell me I can't drive. Hand over the wheel, Bobo.
:'''Bobo:''' You can't drive!
:'''Noah:''' Radio's broken, so we can't even call for help.
:'''Rex:''' We don't need help. We're not lost. Men don't get lost. We go exploring. And why should you care if I drive? Unless you made some kind of deal with Six.
:'''Bobo:''' You'll have to ask my bank account.
:'''Six:''' Defend the cargo! Don't let them get to the trailers!
:''[Gatlocke humming]''
:''[Gatlocke humming continues]''
:''[Gatlocke grunts]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' As of this moment, the unstable nanites have officially been jacked.
:''[Gatlocke laughs evilly]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' ''[to Six]'' Give me a reason. Give me one good reason.
:''[Gatlocke laughs evilly]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' I'm only kidding! Like I need a reason.
:''[Shoots at Six]''
:'''Six:''' We'll regroup outside the canyon! Get us out of here now!
:'''Providence Agent:''' Sir, they got the cargo.
:'''Six:''' I'm aware the situation. Rex wasn't with the convoy when we we're attacked.
:'''Six:''' Fix the radio and find him. Off all the days to disobey orders.
:'''Rex:''' Pit stop successful!
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:''[Noah grunts]''
:'''Noah:''' This soda is expired.
:'''Rex:''' I know! They were practically giving it away!
:''[Bobo spits]''
:'''Bobo:''' Agh! This tastes like feet-- And not the clean kind!
:'''Rex:''' Fine-- More for me, then!
:'''Noah:''' By now, they must've noticed that you're gone.
:'''Rex:''' No one's going to miss a delivery truck. Hurry up!
:'''Noah:''' Go faster!
:'''Rex:''' Ladies, how's it going today? Yeah, we roll in a big truck. Other guys may flake on you, but me and Noah-- We deliever.
:''[girls laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' Bobo!
:''[Rex, Noah and Bobo shout]''
:'''Rex:''' I think we actually had a chance back there.
:'''Gatlocke:''' Gentlemen, congratulations on a job well done. Your commitment to... Oh, forget it. Open the truck!
:'''Beasly:''' Communications are still down, sir. We can send a cycle for help.
:'''Six:''' No. I want everything available searching the area.
:'''Beasly:''' For the attackers?
:'''Six:''' For Rex. He's not transporting what he thinks he is. Given the circumstances, he should probably know. Let's just hope he didn't get himself lost.
:'''Bobo:''' Okay... I think we might be lost.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa, whoa. Noah gets the wheel? What about me?
:'''Bobo:''' Think about it, soda jerk. My mouth still tastes like week-old socks. Plus, goldilocks has a license, and you don't. But mostly the soda thing.
:'''Noah:''' I think I know where we are.
:'''Rex:''' Don't sweat it. Who's gonna miss a truck full of toilet paper?
:'''Bobo:''' Hey, I've been there-- Ain't pretty.
:'''Gatlocke:''' ''[referring to toilet paper]'' Feel that? It's quilted. This is the good kind. But I won't be able to really enjoy it until I have those nanites!
:'''Gang Punk:''' Gatlocke, I found something.
:'''Gatlocke:''' Something is good.
:'''Gang Punk:''' Our scout took this image when the convoy left the proving grounds.
:'''Gatlocke:''' I like how he framed this shot. See the rock formations in the foreground here?
:'''Gang Punk:''' But this is from the canyon. Where'd the white delivery truck go?
:'''Gatlocke:''' Why are you asking me? I don't know where it went! Fan out! Dig around the desert! Find me that truck! And an Iced Tea!
:'''Rex:''' Noah, you've got to listen to me. Let... me... drive... the... truck!
:'''Noah:''' I don't know.
:'''Bobo:''' The answer is still no!
:'''Noah:''' All right, we're back! This is the right road.
:'''Rex:''' How can you tell? All the roads look the same out here.
:''[Noah gasps]''
:'''Gang Punk:''' Gatlocke, you're not gonna believe what I found.
:'''Noah:''' This canyon-- It'd be the perfect place to spring an ambush.
:'''Rex:''' The nanite transport is gone. Six, can your hear me? Six? Providence, come in.
:'''Six:''' Go ahead.
:'''Rex:''' Connect me to White. Now would be good.
:'''Noah:''' We're sitting ducks here.
:'''Bobo:''' Quack, quack.
:'''Rex:''' Um, I'll call you back.
:'''Gatlocke:''' Allow me to introduce myself! I'm Gatlocke-- Anarchist, struggling businessman, scoundrel. Okay, that's a lie. I'm not 'struggling'. But, lemme ask you! Do you like rules?
:'''Rex:''' Can't say I do.
:'''Gatlocke:''' Me neither. I hate them. It's why me and my men live by the anarchist code. For us, there are no rules.
:'''Gang Punk:''' Excepts no cursing.
:'''Gatlocke:''' ''[hits the Gang Punk]'' True! We're anarchists, not animals. You know what I'm talking about. I feel like we have a connection. We're practically friends! So, if you could do me a favor, it would help me out a lot.
:'''Rex:''' What kind of favor?
:'''Gatlocke:''' I need you to hand over the truck. I mean, I really need you to hand it over-- Now!
:'''Rex:''' This truck? It's not all that great. The radio doesn't work. It handles like a box on wheels. At least, I imagine it does, 'cause someone won't let me drive.
:'''Gatlocke:''' ''[pulls out a knife]'' Please don't play dumb with me.
:'''Rex:''' Dumb? Oh, see, dumb is pulling a blade on me!
:''[Rex pulls out his Smack Hands]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' Ooh, I like this kid.
:''[Rex growls]''
:'''Rex:''' Get back to the truck!
:''[Rex and his friends run away]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' I have a bad case of EVO envy.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Noah:''' You're risking our lives to save a stupid truck?
:'''Rex:''' It's the principle!
:''[Rex, Noah and Bobo screams]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! They really want that toilet paper!
:'''Bobo:''' They didn't exactly look like poster boys for good hygiene!
:'''Noah:''' Are you sure that's even what we're carrying? I mean, did anyone actually bother to check?
:'''Bobo:''' Don't bother me with the details.
:'''Noah:''' That's definitely not T.P.
:'''Rex:''' We were carrying unstable nanites the whole time.
:'''Bobo:''' We should be fine as long as none of the warning lights are on.
:'''Noah:''' You mean all the red, blinky ones?
:'''Bobo:''' Aw, boy.
:'''Rex:''' Giving us the nanites? What was Six thinking?
:'''Bobo:''' He was thinking that if the convoy was to get attacked, we're better to have the cargo than with you?
:'''Rex:''' Could've at least told us we were carrying something that could blow up.
:'''Noah:''' Whoa!
:'''Rex:''' Glad I'm not driving.
:'''Six:''' We have ten more minutes till Providence starts missing us. When we don't check in, they'll send jets, and coming in blind, there's a good chance we'll get shot down like ours did.
:'''Beasly:''' We're working as fast as we can, sir. Whatever they use completely fried the relays.
:'''Six:''' Then we'll need another option.
:'''Beasly:''' Well, there is one possibility, but it's a little old-fashioned.
:'''Rex:''' Let me take the nanites and zoom out of here.
:'''Noah:''' Didn't you hear Six? They can't go above sea level. One long bump will make them go off.
:'''Bobo:''' Kid's right. They're safer in the isolator back there.
:'''Rex:''' All right, fine. Then we'll just deal with the roadhogs ourselves.
:'''Noah:''' So... Any idea on that?
:'''Bobo:''' I vote &quot;Try not to die.&quot;
:''[Gatlocke laughs evilly]''
:'''Rex:''' Look on the bright side-- The unstable nanites didn't go off.
:'''Gatlocke:''' That's what I love-- An optimist! ''[Hugs Rex]'' I love this kid!
:'''Rex:''' You're insane. Do you realize that?
:'''Gatlocke:''' Me, Gatlocke, insane? Frankly, I don't see it. Just let me have 'em. I'll split the money with you down the middle, 50/40?
:'''Rex:''' Wow, after all that, you're nothing but a common thief.
:'''Gatlocke:''' &quot;Common&quot;? &quot;Common&quot;?! Tear open the truck!
:'''Gang Punk:''' It's no here. Ugh!
:'''Noah:''' That was some escape plan.
:'''Rex:''' It was one of my plans. I have a couple different angles I'm working.
:'''Noah:''' What's your &quot;angle&quot; now?
:'''Rex:''' I've got the unstable nanites right here!
:'''Bobo:''' Ah, this is an improvement.
:'''Rex:''' ''[holding up a can]'' Back off, or I'll send us all to kingdom come!
:'''Gatlocke:''' You wouldn't dare.
:'''Rex:''' Or would I? You say we're a lot alike.
:'''Gatlocke:''' You would.
:'''Rex:''' Unh!
:''[Gatlocke and Gang Punks screams]''
:'''Rex:''' Aw. Quit while you're behind, Gatlocke.
:''[Gatlocke growls]''
:''[Gatlocke growls]''
:'''Rex:''' We're clear. Now, aren't you glad about the soda? Bobo, take the nanites. I'll keep them off your tail.
:'''Gatlocke:''' You should've taken the deal.
:'''Rex:''' You couldn't afford me.
:'''Gatlocke:''' You know what your problem is? You're a terrible businessman.
:''[Gatlocke growls]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' Ooh, I like that.
:''[Gatlocke grunts]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' Hey! Dude.
:'''Noah:''' I'll radio. Hello? Can anyone hear me? We need a little help here! Anyone?
:'''Bobo:''' ''[taking the communicator from Noah]'' Gimme that! Breaker 1-9, good neighbor. This is Bobo Haha, droppin' the hammer in a superskate. We got bumper stickers on our donkey. Repeat-- Bumper sticker on our donkey! Come on back.
:'''Noah:''' Oh, like that helps. Is that even English?
:''[Gatlocke grunting]''
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' Don't suppose I could convince you to join me! You could live the life-- No one telling you what to do.
:'''Rex:''' Can you just shut up for longer than a second?
:'''Gatlocke:''' How long was that?
:''[Gatlocke laughs]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' You can pretend to be better, but in the end, you're just like me!
:'''Rex:''' Ugh! There's one big difference between you and me!
:'''Gatlocke:''' And that is?
:'''Rex:''' You can't fly.
:''[The truck goes over a cliff]''
:'''Gang Punk:''' Hmm? Aah!
:''[Noah gasps]''
:'''Six:''' We intercepted your transmission on the citizens' band.
:'''Bobo:''' See, I told ya.
:'''Six:''' Where are the nanites?
:'''Noah:''' We thought for sure it was gonna go off.
:'''Six:''' It went off.
:'''Rex:''' But you said one wrong bump and it would blow up.
:'''Six:''' I said one wrong bump and it would &quot;go off,&quot; as in &quot;deactivate.&quot; They call them &quot;unstable&quot; for a reason. If it was going to blow up, I would've said so. At least you kept it from falling into the wrong hands.
:'''Gatlocke:''' &quot;The wrong hands,&quot; he says. I'm in a terrible rush. The nanites, pretty please.
:'''Rex:''' All yours. They're worthless.
:''[Gatlocke growls]''
:'''Gatlocke:''' Let's call it a tie. We can finish our conversation later.
:'''Six:''' White Knight will want you back at headquarters for debriefing.
:'''Rex:''' Aren't you going to give us a lift?
:'''Six:''' Drive yourself.
:'''Noah:''' I hate it when Six tries to be funny.
:'''Bobo:''' The monkey should be driving.
:'''Rex:''' You know, now that I'm doing the driving, this truck ain't so bad.
:'''Noah:''' Which way?
:'''Bobo:''' They went that way, back to headquarters.
:'''Noah:''' You're gonna get us lost.
:'''Rex:''' Men don't get lost. We go... Exploring.

===Out of the Dark===
:''Note'': Rex's love interest and sweetheart Circe appears in a vision.

===Payback===
:''[In the realm of Abysus]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Humiliated... De-powered... All but destroyed. Hardly the new world I set out to build, is it?
:'''Biowulf:''' Master, a spy has made contact.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Well?
:'''Providence Spy:''' Everything is in place.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' And the boy?
:'''Providence Spy:''' He's here.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' ''[to his loyal followers]'' Soon our greatest enemy will be buried! Providence itself will be destroyed. And we'll have Rex to thank.
:'''Rex:''' Come on! Who's gonna know?
:'''Noah:''' Yeah. It would only be for a minute or two.
:'''Calan:''' You actually want me to let you fly the keep?
:''[Calan sighs]''
:'''Calan:''' Only until the next course change. And nothing fancy.
:'''Rex:''' All right, let's see what this baby can really do! Why, it wasn't me! Seriously!
:'''Both:''' Whoa!
:'''Providence Spies:''' Aah!
:'''White Knight:''' Calan, what's your status?
:'''Calan:''' Came from out of nowhere. We're being boarded. Scramble all jump jets. Mobilize for a counter-offensive.
:'''White Knight:''' This is a coordinated attack. Every major Providence outpost around the globe has been hit.
:'''Six:''' So far they've steered clear of headquarters. I'm on route to the keep now.
:'''Rex:''' Are they really that stupid? Attacking the keep with me on board? This should only take a minute.
:'''Noah:''' Wait up!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Find Rex. It goes without saying &quot;alive&quot; would be ideal. Take the ship.
:'''Providence Spy:''' Some kind of power surge. We're losing control of the helm!
:'''Calan:''' Find out where it's coming from. Doc, if you'll excuse me--
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Six?
:'''Six:''' Five minutes out. Prepare for an evac. I'm getting you off the ship.
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Noah:''' Again with the Smack Hands? You always open with that move. Change it up a little!
:'''Both:''' Whoa!
:'''Bobo:''' You see what you get? That's what happens when you interrupt my nap-- Bobo gets cranky!
:'''Rex:''' I learned that the hard way, too.
:'''Calan:''' All hands-- We've got intruders on deck four, five, and six. Get'em off our ship!
:'''Rex:''' Go!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Attention, Providence. The ship is ours.
:'''Rex:''' Ugh! Not even close, Van Kleiss!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Lay down your weapons, and your lives will be spared. Continue to resist and nothing survives.
:'''Rex:''' You've made I made some lame-o moves before, Van Kleiss, but this one-- classic.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Seems you may have run out of tricks. Oh, you had to know it would only be a matter of time. I've had a fair amount of time on my hands these days. ''[Restrains Rex with his gauntlet]''
:'''Rex:''' Aaaaah!
:'''Van Kleiss:'''  You took something very precious from me, Rex, and now I'll be returning the favor.
:'''Rex:''' If you want my monkey, you can forget it. 
:''[Van Kleiss starts draining nanites from Rex, causing him to squirm and scream in pain.]''
:''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' It might come as a surprise that when you stole the nanites that gave my power, you left some of your behind-- Enough to tell me a few of what makes you tick.
:''[Rex tries to summon a build, but nothing happens.]''
:'''Rex:''' Ungh!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' You'll find that using your powers will be something of a challenge. The nanites that you so special belong to me now.
:'''Biowulf:''' What shall I do with him, master?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I have everything I need from him. I could care less. Secure the rest of the ship.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Come on! Do you really think throwing me out that hatch is the best way to get rid of me? Wouldn't it be more fun to throw me in a cage, tie me down in front of a laser?
:'''Biowulf:''' No!
:'''Rex:''' Aaaaaaaah! Wh-o-o-o-o-oa!
:'''Noah:''' What is he doing?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' This is no time to fool around, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' Happened to notice that ground coming up on his, doc? If you don't do something fast, I'm about to become part of it! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Ugh!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, are you okay?
:'''Rex:''' I think we may have a problem.
:'''White Knight:''' What do you mean &quot;they have the keep&quot;?! Blow it up!
:'''Six:''' We tried. The remote-destruct sequence has been disabled. Van Kleiss has complete control of it.
:'''White Knight:''' Give me some good news.
:'''Six:''' We know where it's heading. Here.
:'''Biowulf:''' This is the commanding officer. We found him attempting to destroy this ship.
:'''Calan:''' What's your game, Van Kleiss?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Oh, a very good question-- One that depends entirely on what happens next, Captain. It seems my powers have made a slight... change.
:'''Rex:''' Well? They're gone, aren't they? Van Kleiss took all my active nanites.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Not exactly. I found this. Definitely a nanite, but it's unlike anything I've ever seen. Molecular scans seems to indicate it's some kind of control-nanite.
:'''Rex:''' But with nothing to control.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' With a large enough concentration of nanites, we might be able to jump-start it. But even with that, there's no guarantee it would replicate or even give you back the same abilities.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I hate to say it, but this one has me stumped.
:'''Rex:''' Great. Loving this.
:'''White Knight:''' If you're finished with the lost cause, we've got a bigger problem.
:'''Biowulf:''' Master, how is this possible?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' It would seem Rex's nanites have an opposite effect on me. He cured EVOs. Now I create them. Full ahead-- Ramming speed! Once we're through, we'll destroy Providence from the inside out.
:'''White Knight:''' Lock it down! I want hallways cleared and critical sections defended. They will not take this base.
:'''Rex:''' Well? What are we waiting for? Let's go stop them!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, you're in no condition to fight.
:'''Rex:''' Well, what do you expect me to do-- Hide?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Whatever it takes. That nanite inside you might be able to bring you back, but it's going to take me time to figure out how. And that's not something we have a lot of right now.
:'''Rex:''' Wow. Nice outfit.
:'''Noah:''' Got one for you, too. You get to armor up like the rest of us normals.
:'''Rex:''' Come on.
:'''Bobo:''' All right, where to?
:'''Rex:''' South Pacific.
:'''Bobo:''' That's my boy. And here I thought you'd try to pull some hero stunt. Oh, brother.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I want the White Knight. Find where he's hiding and bring him to me.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' That should be everything, as long as the offsite backup holds.
:'''Six:''' Don't let it get to that.
:'''Noah:''' This is a strange place for a base.
:'''Rex:''' When I have too many nanites in me, this is where I go to offload.
:'''Bobo:''' Think of it as a nanite porta-potty.
:'''Noah:''' Thanks... For that image, Bobo. So, we just put some of these nanites in you, and we're good to go?
:'''Rex:''' No. They're inactive. Or at least stripped of their programming. Since I can't control them, I just have to hope that whatever this thing is inside me can't.
:'''Noah:''' So... What happens if it can't?
:'''Bobo:''' Let me put it this way-- The last guy who went swimmin' in that soup ended up a 50-foot freak show.
:'''White Knight:''' Listen to me carrefully, Van Kleiss.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I'd rather not.
:'''White Knight:''' Where are they?
:'''Six:''' The inner perimeter has been compromised. They're coming.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Ugh! Ungh!
:''[Skalamander roars]''
:''[Skalamander roars]''
:'''Biowulf:''' Open it.
:'''Rex:''' Okay. Bobo, set the thing to &quot;vent&quot; and go. If this doesn't work, I don't want you getting caught in the blast.
:'''Bobo:''' No.
:'''Noah:''' Forget it. Rex, at least think about his for a sec. What if it wipes your memory? What it turns you into some evil monster?
:'''Rex:''' My friends need me. There's nothing more to think about. Bobo, do it.
:'''Bobo:''' Long odds, pay big.
:''[Bobo groans]''
:'''Six:''' You've overstayed your welcome.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Now, here's someone who would make a nice addition to our EVO ranks.
:'''Six:''' Go ahead and try. Ugh!
:''[Six groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Trying to do my job for me, Six? Here's a thought-- When your top henchman can't even get rid of someone by throwing him out of a moving plane, time to rethink the help.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' You are determined-- I'll give you that. If it's what you prefer, I'll finish you myself.
:'''Rex:''' Maybe.
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Ugh!
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Cool!
:'''Bobo:''' See? I told you it would work.
:'''Six:''' This is an unexpected surprise.
:'''Rex:''' Well, by now, you should expect the unexpected from me, Six.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Ungh!
:''[Skalamander roars]''
:''[Dr. Holiday grunts]''
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Noah:''' Is that what I think it is?
:'''Bobo:''' Not anymore.
:'''Noah:''' You think there might be more of them?
:'''Bobo:''' Eh... Probably.
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:''[Biowulf growls]''
:'''Biowulf:''' Aaaaaaah!
:'''White Knight:''' I use that electromagnet to trap stray nanites. You're lucky it's on the lowest setting. Any higher, and it would rip the nanites right out of your body.
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:'''Biowulf:''' Then why don't you?
:'''White Knight:''' Because then I wouldn't be able to do this.
:'''Skalamander:''' No one can help you. You're all alone now.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Not exactly. We still have my sister.
:''[Skalamander grunting]''
:''[Rex and Van Kleiss grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Aaaaah!
:'''Rex:''' No way!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Ungh!
:'''Rex:''' Once again, epic fail. I'll take my nanites back now.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Ugh!
:'''Noah:''' Rex, wait!
:'''Bobo:''' Van Kleiss left behind a few presents.
:'''Rex:''' No time to look everywhere. I'm shutting everything down.
:'''Noah:''' You can do that?
:'''Rex:''' Don't know. Never tried. Anything else? No?
:'''Calan:''' Whew! I never want to do that again. No, sir.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Amazing.
:'''Rex:''' Why, thank you.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I was talking about the nanites. That was a risky move, Rex, but it worked. As far as I can tell, you're back to your old self.
:'''Rex:''' I don't know. Something feels different. That new build-- I think I can do even more. It's like I can see the blueprints. I just need to figure out how to put it all together.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' White Knight in person. Never thought I'd see the day.
:'''White Knight:''' Well, don't get used to it. We found all the explosives. The base and the keep will need extensive repairs. This was not our finest hour.
:'''Rex:''' What are you talking about? We kicked butt! So what if Van Kleiss is back and more powerful than ever? So am I! If he wants a nanite war, let him bring it!
:''[White Knight laughs]''
:'''White Knight:''' It's good to have your back, Rex.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' You know, I think he actually means it.
:'''Rex:''' Sure he does. So, tell me something, guys-- What's next?

==Season Two (2011)==
===Rampage===
:'''Rex:''' I'll give you the recap. Thanks to these microscopic machines called nanites, I can build cool gear out of my body. I'm what's called an EVO. But most EVOs aren't lucky like me. They usually look like this. ''[Chuckling]'' I know what you're thinking. And they smell bad, too. There's one other thing I can do that makes me even more special. Some EVOs, I can cure. That's why I work for Providence. We're the people you call when an evo is tearing up your lawn or attacking a city. And the worst of them is this guy-- Van Kleiss. The last time we fought, things got a little out of hand. I'll admit it-- We pretty much got our tails handed to us. He steals the key, wrecks headquarters, hijacks my nanite to get back the powers I took away from him. And now he can actually make people into EVOs. Then, to top it off, he has his dog boy Biowulf throw me, overboard at 6,000 feet. Not that anyone's keeping score. Sure, Van Kleiss may be back, but so am I. So what if he can make EVOs? I can still cure them. He may have new powers, but guess what-- I do, too. Ever since my powers came back, I've got the ability to make amazing new machines. Now I just have to figure out how to build more. If you're trying to check up on me, Six, the answer's still a big fat... ''[imitates buzzer]'' I can't figure out how to make this new build.
:'''Six:''' It might take some time, but you'll get it.
:'''Rex:''' And meanwhile, Van Kleiss is out there doing who knows what. I wish they'd hurry up and get the H.Q. Rebuilt. You're not still living out of your jump jet like some ninja hobo, are you?
:'''Six:''' My temporary accommodations are perfectly adequate.
:'''Rex:''' Yep. Still living in the jet.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' I hate being kicked out of our house. Although, as long as they're building stuff, I need a hot tub.
:''[Carmen gasps]''
:'''Carmen:''' Madre! Estas viva! Como puede ser?
:'''Carmen's mother:''' No querida. Soy la prima gemela diabolica de tu madre.
:'''Noah:''' What are you watching?
:'''Rex:''' Cultural enrichment! Later on, we find out if Dr. Suarez chooses Isabel, or her evil half sister, Ana Maria.
:'''Carmen:''' Pero, como va supremivir esto nuesta familia.
:'''Carmen's mother:''' Con mucho dolor, vengaza y arrepentimiento.
:'''Noah:''' If you're gonna stay with me while they're rebuilding Providence, at least don't flaunt the fact that you don't have a pre-calculus test in three days.
:'''Rex:''' Pre-wha?
:'''Noah:''' Exactly my point. And when I agreed to this, I wasn't expecting the sidekick, too.
:'''Bobo:''' Hey, pally, we're a package deal. Live with it.
:''[Noah gasps]''
:'''Noah:''' Was that a toenail? Can I just get hit by a toenail?!
:'''Rex:''' What's your deal?
:'''Noah:''' Aah! Get one in my mouth! Ugh!
:'''Rex:''' Okay, that is gross. Bobo, bad monkey. I thought this would be fun.
:''[Noah scoffs]''
:'''Noah:''' For you, maybe. I'll get a real life, too, you know. As much as I want it to be, it can't be all fun and games all the time, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' Why not? Worse for me.
:'''Noah:''' Hey, I like adventure as much as the next guy, but I still have to pass math.
:'''Rex:''' You're not going to fail math. You have like the fourth highest GPA in your class.
:'''Noah:''' It used to be third. 
:'''Rex:''' And ten years from now, nobody's going to care. Hey doc, miss me? Huh? Oh. A situation. Really? Awesome! Nope. I'm not doing anything. Be right there. I'm gonna go pound some EVO into submission. Wanna come?
:'''Noah:''' You're serious?
:'''Rex:''' No. That would be you. Have fun with that math.
:'''Noah:''' Save the world or a chance at a scholarship? All right! I'm coming!
:'''Rex:''' Now see? It's a lot more fun when you just let go.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Can you hold that thing still?
:'''Rex:''' Dibs! That's a whole lot of agents for one EVO, doc.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' They weren't here for the EVO. That ship is carrying the new power core for Providence headquarters. This thing just happened to show up when we started to offload it.
:''[Dr. Holiday grunting]''
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Wh-o-o-o-oa!
:''[Rex straining]''
:'''Rex:''' Van Kleiss!
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' Did you see the mark? Van Kleiss made that one.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Why else do you think I've been trying to get a sample from it?
:'''Rex:''' I don't know-- Just being science-y? Ugh!
:'''Bobo and Noah:''' Yeah!
:'''Rex:''' Does that work for you?
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It'll do. Got it. We can cure it now.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Aah!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Chuckling]'' Unless you like getting thrown around like that.
:'''Noah:''' No hurry. This is great.
:'''Bobo and Noah:''' Ew!
:''[Dock worker grunts]''
:'''Dock worker:''' What hit me?
:'''Rex:''' That would be me.
:'''Six:''' You work here?
:'''Dock worker:''' What do you think, mister? Ahh, my back.
:'''Rex:''' Yep. Sorry. Was trying, you know, not to die. If he works at the dock, that must mean Van Kleiss was here.
:'''Noah:''' Actually, I think he still is.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' They're after the power core.
:'''Rex:''' All this for a battery?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Not just a battery. It could fuel a country the size of Abysus for a decade.
:'''Rex:''' And it was going to be underneath my room?! Excuse me. Out of the way! Coming through! I was wondering when you and your hair would show up again, Van Kleiss.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Back to your old self again, I see. And how are those new abilities developing?
:'''Rex:''' Just fine. Thanks for asking. Here's what I bet you're thinking, &quot;did we really think this plan through? Was using some poor dude as a decoy the best move?&quot;
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I suppose only time will tell. Not as strong as you thought.
:'''Rex:''' Not yet. That time I really thought I had it, okay? Ohh!
:'''Noah:''' How awesome was that?
:'''Rex:''' What part-- You clobbering Van Kleiss or Van Kleiss clobbering me?
:'''Noah:''' Well, both, actually.
:'''Rex:''' Hold on. I need a second to think of a really good dig.
:''[Van Kleiss chuckles]''
:'''Rex:''' Why are you smiling? We just owned you. It's over, Van Kleiss. You lose!
:'''Noah:''' That was the best you could come up with. &quot;You lose&quot;?
:'''Rex:''' That one didn't count. He caught me off guard with the whole smiling thing, okay?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' You'd be wise to consider delaying your celebration for the moment, Rex. You're about to have your hands quite full.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, really? And how do you figure that?
:'''Noah:''' Aah!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Here's the part where you must be thinking, &quot;did I think this plan through?&quot;
:'''Rex:''' Noah!
:''[Noah growls]''
:'''Rex:''' Are you nuts?! Stop it!
:'''Six:''' Stand down!
:'''Rex:''' Take it easy, Noah. You're going to be okay. This will all be over in a second. Great. Just great.
:'''Six:''' Go!
:'''Rex:''' Noah, if you can still understand me, when I said you should let things go, this isn't exactly what I meant.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Headache. It should be about balance, you know? Take care of the important stuff, but leave room for a little fun. Right now! Too much fun!
:''[Rex screaming]''
:'''Rex:''' Wh-o-o-o-oa! Everything's fine. Not a problem.
:'''Six:''' If you can't stop him, it's going to be.
:'''Rex:''' You know, Six, you really need to learn to think positive.
:''[Diane Farrah and Reporter gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Stupid grin. It's like it's all just a game to him.
:'''Determined grandmother:''' I know you!
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, uh, thanks, but--
:'''Determined grandmother:''' You're that &quot;tex&quot; kid from Providence.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, Rex. Ma'am, this really isn't--
:'''Determined grandmother:''' I have a bone to pick with Providence. Do you realize how awful it's been?
:''[Rex chuckles]''
:'''Rex:''' Funny story, he's actually my friend, so as soon as I can catch him--
:'''Determined grandmother:''' Every single night, someone moves my glasses. I leave them on the nightstand, and when I wake up, they're on the dresser!
:'''Rex:''' Glasses?
:'''Determined grandmother:''' There's got to be an EVO in my house. Some of them only come out  at night, you know.
:'''Rex:''' Uh-huh.
:'''Determined grandmother:''' Now, I keep calling you people, but no one will give me the time of day over there. So, you tell me-- How am I supposed to feel safe when there is an EVO in my apartment?!
:'''Rex:''' Here. First number on speed dial.
:'''Determined grandmother:''' He's eating the cat food, too!
:'''Bobo:''' That friend of yours is a walking disaster. I'm starting to like the kid.
:'''Six:''' We'll get this. Go.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, can you hear me?
:'''Rex:''' A little busy right now, doc.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Then I'll make it quick. The active nanites Van Kleiss create are highly unstable. If Noah isn't cured soon, his condition will be permanent.
:'''Rex:''' How long do I have?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's probably different for each infected person, but I calculate less than an hour.
:'''Rex:''' Noah, you have to listen to me. If I don't change you back, this is not going to turn out well. Please. Let me help you. No! No! Thanks a lot, guys!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Noah, I'm serious! Stop playing around!
:''[Rex screams]''
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' This isn't a game, Noah! Huh. Maybe it should be. Okay, Noah. I give up! You're it! Better not be another train. All right!
:''[Noah roaring]''
:'''Rex:''' Aw, no.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Well, what do you know? I'm &quot;it&quot; again.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, any luck?
:'''Rex:''' Yep. I got him. Stand by. This isn't going to hurt. I promise.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex?
:'''Rex:''' I'm too late. I don't believe this. My best friend's an EVO forever-- And not even a cool EVO. He's the annoying, breaks-stuff kind.
:''[Noah belches]''
:'''Rex:''' Ugh!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Actually, Rex, it might not be Noah. Your biometrics have flat-lined.
:'''Rex:''' All that running around. He just wore me out. Did you hear that? It's me, not you.
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' Just give me a minute.
:''[Noah roaring]''
:'''Rex:''' Noah, don't even-- No, no, no, no, no. No! No! I don't believe this. You really need a hobby, Van Kleiss.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I thought we could settle things without distraction. Here is as good a place as any.
:'''Rex:''' I already kicked your butt once today. Ready to go again?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' The question is, are you? It's hardly a fair fight.
:'''Rex:''' Oh. Then I promised to go easy on you. What? You think I don't have my powers or something? I'm about to give you the pounding of the century! Come on, powers. Please come back! Don't you have anything better to do with your life than come after me all the time?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Funny you should ask.
:'''Rex:''' Doc? How are those biometrics looking now?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Give it a try.
:'''Rex:''' Ah, yeah! It's about time! Machines work. I just hope the important part does.
:'''Noah:''' What just happened?
:'''Rex:''' Do you remember anything?
:'''Noah:''' It all kind of hazy. I mostly remember the feeling of... Fun. And I remember you punching me in the face.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah. Sorry about that. I thought you were trying to eat me. Come on. We've got a rat to catch. Why so happy? Is this the part where breach shows up and rescues you?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Actually, no. This is the part where she takes your inadequately guarded fuel core.
:'''Six:''' Six to post, what's your status? Six to post.
:'''Rex:''' Another decoy?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I should share some of the credit with your friend over here. He played the part to perfection.
:'''Noah:''' Gee, thanks.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Now, this would be the part where Breach shows up.
:'''Noah:''' I can't believe I did all this. Sounds like I had the time of my life.
:'''Rex:''' ''[laughing]'' It almost became your life. Sorry about that.
:'''Noah:''' Are you kidding? Just knowing I was a rampaging EVO is cool. I wish I could have remembered at least some of it.
:'''Rex:''' It's probably all over the news if you want a replay... At least until you stepped on the news van.
:'''Noah:''' Well... ''[Exhales sharply]'' Guess it's back to quadratic equations.
:'''Rex:''' I have no idea what those are. I've got somewhere I need to be. See you later. I know. I'm not supposed to be here. I don't care if it's a construction zone. I'm moving back.
:'''Six:''' It's all right. Turns out you're not the only one who feels that way. You'll get used to the cold showers. Food, you're on your own. From the top?
:'''Rex:''' From the top.
:'''Six:''' What were you trying to build, anyway?
:'''Rex:''' A water jet. Oh, by the way, I need a new cellphone.
:'''Six:''' Yes?
:'''Determined grandmother:''' ''[through phone]'' It's after my glasses again.
:'''Six:''' Glasses?
:'''Determined grandmother:''' ''[through phone]'' This time I am serious. Now, when are you going to send someone out here?
:'''Six:''' Ma'am, I'm...
:'''Determined grandmother:''' ''[through phone]'' Do you even work for Providence?
:'''Six:''' Yes, I work for Providence.
:'''Determined grandmother:''' ''[through phone]'' What kind of a flimflam outfit is this?
:'''Six:''' How did you get this number?

===Wasteland===
===Tough Love===

===The Lost Weekend===
:'''Kenwyn:''' What did you to Skwydd?
:'''Mouse:''' Just shedding a light light on how dangerous his kind can be.
:'''Rex:''' By juicing his powers? What were you thinking?
:'''Mouse:''' Most inorganic material explodes when given that kind of molecular jolt, but not not nanites. They convert the energy into power that amplifies an E.V.O.'s abilities to tremendously uncontrollable levels.

===Star-Crossed===

===Alliance===
:'''Rex:''' The ends of the earth lie a place so deadly, it was sealed forever from the outside world. Welcome... to the Bug Jar... Where monstrous creatures roam free... Where a faithless ruler seeks to escape  to inflict his wrath upon humanity. But now, the Great Barrier is on the verge of failure... And the hope of all mankind lies in the bravest, most capable hands. And, uh, speaking of hands, you have four. Think you could lend one?
:'''Bobo:''' Whoops.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Guys, what's the status of the shield?
:'''Rex:''' The power regulator is completely trashed, doc. I'll need to control it manually until I can get it started. Mm. Kind of ripe in here.
:'''Bobo:''' That little back door there?
:''[Bobo clears throat]''
:'''Bobo:''' Not the bathroom. More Bug Jar, buddies. I got the last one.
:'''Rex:''' ''[Sighs]'' Fine. Hold this. And whatever you do, do not let go.
:'''Bobo:''' Or what?
:'''Rex:''' Kaboom!
:'''Bobo:''' He will pay.
:'''Rex:''' Okay, little wormie, come to papa. Whoa. Yet even in this forsaken place, our hero runs afoul of his evil nemesis... Van Kleiss. Activating stealth suit. Looks like Van Kleiss decided to crash the party.
:'''Bobo:''' Just like that guy knocked the phone ahead.
:'''Rex:''' ''[to himself]'' And he brought his Pack flunkies. Biowulf, Skalamander, Breach. Circe? Gotta hurry. Their headed straight for-- Someplace else. Gonna find out where.
:'''Bobo:''' No way. You're not leaving me here with your--
:'''Rex:''' Sorry. Another call.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, why aren't you fixing that shield regulator?
:'''Rex:''' Hint-- You may remember him from such schemes as destroying Providence headquarters, and trying to take over the entire Earth.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Van Kleiss, in there? You're right. You should investigate, after you fix the shield.
:'''Rex:''' Then it might be too late.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' She's there, isn't she?
:'''Rex:''' Who, Breach? Yeah, but--
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' A quick recon, and that's it. I'll try to buy some time at this end. And I want regular check-ins.
:'''Rex:''' Yep, got it.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Intriguing. An entire divergent branch of EVO development.
:'''Biowulf:''' This place is a waste of our time.
:'''Circe:''' Van Kleiss knows what he's doing. It's not your place to question.
:'''Biowulf:''' Question?! You dare accuse me of disloyalty?! Hmm.
:'''Circe:''' Sorry. Get a grip.
:'''Rex:''' With no care for his own safety, our brave hero tails his quarry into the very lion's den. Unknown to the villain, he'll be meddling in forces he can't possibly control.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Circe, if you would?
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:'''NoFace:''' Intruders!
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:''[Skalamander grunts]''
:'''NoFace:''' Who are you?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Someone in a position to help you.
:'''NoFace:''' Follow.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Breach, with me. The rest of you, remain here.
:'''Biowulf:''' Master, my place is at your side.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I want no interruptions, Biowulf. Is that clear?
:'''Rex:''' Okay, folks, here's the 4-1-1. VK, NoFace-- Getting cozy. Gonna try to bust it up. That's all I got for now. Over and out.
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, don't you dare hang up! I'm a feeling a cramp coming on!
:'''Circe:''' You're right, you know. We should be down there with him. What is he up to, anyway?
:'''Biowulf:''' I... do not know.
:'''Circe:''' You don't know? I thought he trusted you with everything.
:'''Biowulf:''' Of course he does! He just--
:'''Rex:''' Hey! Easy on the stealth suit, which apparently, isn't so stealthy.
:'''Circe:''' Rex?
:'''Skalamander:''' Providence Spy!
:'''Rex:''' Right! Man, got it in one! Yep, we heard V.K. was looking for a new second-in-command.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Biowulf:''' What?!
:'''Rex:''' True story. Got it straight from intel. Not surprised, really. That NoFace is one bad dude. Guess Bio-Whelp here ain't cutting it these days.
:''[Biowulf roars]''
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:''[Skalamander grunts]''
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:'''Circe:''' Aah!
:'''Rex:''' Seen it before. First they keep you out of meetings.
:''[Skalamander grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Then the boss chews you out for trying to do your job. Next thing you know, you're taking orders from the new guy, and you're just another hench like Skalamander.
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:''[Biowulf growls]''
:'''Rex:''' Here comes the moment when our brave hero sweeps the girl of her feet!
:'''Biowulf:''' Don't let him.
:'''Rex:''' Literally!
:'''Circe:''' Hey! Let--
:'''Rex:''' ''[flies off with Circe in his arms]'' See you around, henchie!
:'''Biowulf:''' ''[to Skalamander]'' Follow them!
:'''Circe:''' Down! Now!
:'''Rex:''' Not till we hear each other out!
:'''Circe:''' Sure. I'll go first.
:''[Circe roar echoing]'' 
:''[Breaks the Bogie Pack with a hypersonic burst, causing them to fall]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Oh, great! Way to go, Circe!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Any word from Rex?
:'''Bobo:''' He ain't back, and I'm still holding the bag. Hold on. Rex? That you, pal? Hidin' in plain sight. I hate this place.
:'''NoFace:''' Invaders have come before. They brought only pain.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' It is a pain we both share. The same Providence outsides attacked my lands, destroyed my army.
:'''NoFace:''' There was one who tormented us-- Humiliated us. The grower of machines.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Ah, Rex. Another thorn we share. My proposal is simple. You control a formidable legion. I, in turn, can provide the escape and the vengeance you seek. I can be your liberator. You can be my general. Together, we will crush our enemies, starting with the one you hate most. Now, then, are we--
:'''Biowulf:''' Master, I have a report.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' ''[Irritated]'' This is a private conversation. Can't you handle the slightest detail without bothering me?
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:'''Biowulf:''' Of course, master. It was nothing.
:''[Circe grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Ouch!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' ''[to himself]'' Our hero pursues the girl of his dreams, heedless of her attempts to break his heart.
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Along with the rest of him. Circe! Just give me one minute, okay? Look, no powers.
:'''Circe:''' One minute. But if this is about leaving the Pack--
:'''Rex:''' Please. I'm way past that. There are bigger things going on here than who you hang out with.
:'''Circe:''' Fifty seconds.
:'''Rex:''' I wasn't sent here to spy on you. I'm here to stop these things from ever getting out.
:'''Circe:''' Forty. Why are you telling me this? You know who I am.
:'''Rex:''' You've seen the things that live here. Whatever deal you think Van Kleiss is making, it's going to turn out bad for everyone.
:'''Circe:''' Thirty seconds.
:'''Rex:''' I do know who you are, Circe. Just once think for yourself! Maybe your perfect leader could actually be wrong, maybe even a bit crazy. Nuts! Certifiably insane!
:'''Circe:''' Shut up!
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:'''Circe:''' Twenty. Talk about blinded. Did you ever wonder why Van Kleiss is so interested in you?
:'''Rex:''' Oh, I don't know. Maybe he wants me dead?
:'''Circe:''' Not anymore. Something has changed, Rex. Ever since you got your powers back, I hear him talking. Says you have something that's the key to everything. For whatever reason, he needs you alive. I know it, Rex. He'd never let you be killed.
:'''Rex:''' Never, huh?
:'''Circe:''' Time's up.
:''[Circe grunts]''
:'''NoFace:''' Enough talk! Free us!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' You understand I need certain... assurances.
:'''NoFace:''' Assurances? Explain.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' If I free you, will you trust in my leadership and mine alone?
:'''NoFace:''' Leadership must be proven. Show us you can defeat our enemies.
:'''Rex:''' Now, this looks like a party.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Rex. You never cease to amaze me.
:'''No-Face:''' Defiler! Give it to us!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Now do you believe I can deliver what I say? Will you agree to my leadership?
:'''NoFace:''' We agree to it! Give him to us! Now! Now! Now!
:'''Circe:''' ''[very shocked]'' Van Kleiss, I didn't bring Rex here so you could-- He'll kill him!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Never forget how I found you, Circe. What you were... before. He's yours. 
:''[Tears well up in Circe's eyes; thoroughly horrified that her master would calmly allow Rex's life to be put at risk]''
:'''NoFace:''' You! Bring him to the vestibule!
:'''Rex:''' You have your orders!
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:'''Biowulf:''' I'm going to enjoy this.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' You were supposed to finish me off. Now you just get to watch with the other hench bags. Surrounded by the jeering throng, the hero faces certain doom. The heartbreaker looks on. When it's over, she'll regret shunning his advances.
:'''NoFace:''' Now you feel... my pain!
:'''Rex:''' First, a few ground rules. Nothing below the belt, and I have a date on Friday, so easy on the face.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' It's not exactly a problem in your case, having NoFace and all. Huh?
:''[Rex gasps]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' No anchovies on pizza.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' No stripes with plaids.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Termine ser sentados, Por favor!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' ''[weakly]'' Is this what you wanted? 
:''[Collapses from his inquiries, causing Circe to open her eyes]''
:'''Circe''' ''[tearful, pleading]'': Stop this! Please! You need him alive!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Alive-- Yes. Heart pumping, lungs breathing. But his mind? The less that's left of that, the better. Circe, I warn you. Lift so much as a finger to help him, and you're finished!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I'll have this trash removed. And now that you've had your fun, it's time to finalize our--
:'''NoFace:''' We will have our full revenge!
:'''Van Kleiss:''' It seems we've reached something of an impasse.
:'''NoFace:''' We take orders from no one else!
:'''Rex:''' I'm not driving a wedge between you, Am I?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Well played.
:'''Rex:''' Good news for me. For you, not so much.
:''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Pity we couldn't have worked something out. Breach, if you would?
:''[Van Kleiss sighs]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Looks like the hard way, then.
:''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Huh? His work here finished, the hero does the noble thing. He runs like a thief. Adiós!
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Bobo:''' Where the heck have you been?!
:'''Rex:''' You're not still holding on to that, are you? Because it's a good thing-- You know, with the whole... kaboom... Doc, I'm back.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' There you are. Rex, listen to me. If the shield fails, the only solution is a cold reboot of the system. I don't need to tell you what will happen if the thing's in there get out.
:'''Rex:''' Keep your lab coat on. This'll only take a minute. Or maybe not. Doc, do you remember back in the briefing all that stuff you were saying about worst-case scenarios? Yeah, we have a winner. I got nothing.
:'''Bobo:''' Great. 'Cause this situation's not random enough already. Let's throw some raging teen hormones into the mix.
:'''Circe:''' You, Biowulf, even me... We're all just means to an end for him. He doesn't really care about any of us.
:'''Rex:''' Oh, you finally figured that out. Well, better late than never, I guess.
:'''Circe:''' It's not too late, not if I have anything to say about it.
:''[Extends her fleshly and grotesque EVOs mouth]''
:'''Bobo:''' Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! There are some of us around here that might not like the sound of whatever you're about to do.
:'''Circe:''' I'll adjust the frequency to exclude friendly EVOs.
:'''Bobo:''' Does that include me?
:'''Circe:''' For now.
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:''[Uses her melodious, hypnotic singing to call back the EVOs escaping]''
:'''Bobo:''' Whoa, mama!
:''[Bobo grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' I thought you said you could filter it.
:'''Circe:''' It's not an exact science.
:'''Rex:''' It worked! You're calling them all back! And right towards us! Torn between saving his friends or the world, our hero makes the stupid choice.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Come on, Bobo... Focus! Think bananas! Think how much you hate 'em!
:'''Biowulf:''' Get that thing running.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, you'll need to follow this sequence exactly.
:'''Rex:''' Not no time for that!
:'''Computer''': Shield activation in sixty seconds. Fifty-nine, fifty-eight--
:''[Circe roar echoing]''
:''[Circe groans]''
:'''Bobo:''' Gotcha! Not seeing much of a difference.
:'''Rex:''' We are out of here! You coming or what?
:'''Biowulf:''' I was never here.
:''[Biowulf grunts]''
:'''Computer:''' Fourteen, thirteen, twelve, eleven, ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one.
:''[Circe groans]''
:''[Circe grunts]''
:'''Circe:''' Van Kleiss?
:'''Rex:''' Eh, Breach'll get him out... Eventually. But right now he's in there, you're out here. You'll never have a better time to consider, you know, your options.
:''[Notice the two of them holding hands and let go, blushing]''
:'''Bobo:''' What is it about stealing from our own people that's so dang satisfyin'?
:'''Circe:''' You forgot to remove the tracker.
:'''Bobo:''' Eh, funny that.
:'''Circe:''' I'm not going to Providence.
:'''Rex:''' Doesn't matter where you go. All that matters is that you want to go there. That said... I hear Hong Kong's nice this time of year. And so, the tired warrior journeys homeward-- Crisis averted, world saved, villains vanquished.
:'''Bobo:''' Girl not got. Again!
:'''Rex:''' Do you have to rub it in?

===Robo Bobo===
===Divide By Six===
:'''One''': ''[Speaking through Rex]'' Six.
:'''Six''': One?
:'''One''': You left this place, quit life as a mercenary and so rarely returned to visit.
:'''Six''': I did what I felt was right, I never meant to dishonor.
:'''One''': So rarely, that I never had time to tell you how proud you've made me.
:'''Six''': ''[Takes off his glasses for the first time in the series]'' We're going to help you. We're going to take you home.
:'''One''': But Six, I  am home. ''[Rex falls unconscious while One's body starts changing. Eventually his body dissolves and fertilizes the entire island to its former splendor]''
: '''Six:''' He's still One. He's just one with everything.
===Mixed Signals===
: '''Rex:''' Whoa, big guy! Someone needs to ease off on the cheeseburgers.
: '''Six:''' Skip the insults. Start the containment.
: '''Rex:''' Like its feelings are going to get hurt. One bad and ugly going down. What?
: '''Six:''' Rex? Rex!
: '''Rex:''' Cool!
: '''Six:''' You want to explain this?
: '''Rex:''' I don't know. It's like some weird vision of this thing filled my head, then built itself out of me. Maybe the vision came from Blobbo. Maybe it's trying to talk to me. Come on, big boy. Send me some more pictures. What's on your mind?
: '''Six:''' Groceries. That's what's on its mind.
: '''Rex:''' I'm skipping. I'm over it. That vision must have been a fluke.
: '''Six:''' All right, then. We're going with a two-prong attack. Use caution. This kind of EVO might be a splitter. Rex! Snap out of it!
: '''Rex:''' Whoa! Whoa! Ha! I wasn't supposed to do that, right?
: '''Six:''' Rex, I want you back at HQ.
: '''Rex:''' But I feel okay now. And we've got, um-- Two blobs to put down.
: '''Six:''' Now!
: '''Holiday:''' No trace of any recent electrochemical or DNA abnormalities. Everything reads normal.
: '''Rex:''' But it's like the visions were being transmitted, and I was seeing it from a nanite point of view.
: '''Holiday:''' I can't track it, Rex. There's no sign of signal displacement or a nano disturbance. Maybe we should consider the possibility that this is psychological.
: '''Rex:''' Huh? Pizza.
: '''Holiday:''' I think he's having another vision.
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Of lunch?
: '''Rex:''' With pineapple and salmon.
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Blech! He is nuts.
: '''Holiday:''' Aside from a strange choice in pizza toppings, all readings are normal. I can't explain it.
: '''Rex:''' Well, if my nanites are trying to get me to build something, maybe we should give them what they want.
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Whatever it is, I'm not eating it. Is that my electric toothbrush?
: '''Rex:''' It better not be the one I've been using.
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Oh.
: '''Rex:''' This is what I'm seeing in my head. As stupid as it looks. It's like someone or something is sending me instructions to build some big device.
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Or build a pizza with pineapple and salmon.
: '''Rex:''' Okay. I'm not sure about that vision.
: '''Holiday:''' Is that my hairdryer?
: '''Rex:''' I just need to figure out what it does. Maybe it's a time machine. Or-- Or alien technology!
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Maybe it's just a big pile of junk. Or a way to order a really awful pizza.
: '''Contraption Voice:''' Target acquired.
: '''Holiday:''' Rex!
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Wake up!
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Provindece Soldier #1:''' Hey, where do you think you're going? We've got a security breach. Front floor.
: '''Providence Soldier #2:''' Lockdown protocols enabled. All hands report to duty station. Security speed, take position.
: '''Rex:''' Sorry, guys. I might be a little... late.
: '''Caesar:''' Case compression. Release.
: '''Rex:''' Figures I'd build a machine with a serious attitude problem.
: '''Caesar:''' ''[taking off his helmet and turns to Rex]'' Rex, is that you?
: '''Rex:''' Who’s asking?
: '''Caesar:''' It’s me, Caesar, your brother! Mijo! ''[Hugs Rex]'' You're alive and... older. ''[Rex is dumbfounded]'' Uh. Atomic clock was right... ''[spanish accent]'' Es una problema grande.
: '''Rex:''' Uh, yeah. ''[Pushes Caesar]'' It is a big problem.
: '''Caesar:''' What is this place? Who are you people? ''[to Rex]'' I'm getting you out of here!
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Sorry, amigo. Put your hands up. Or don't. I got a clear shot either way.
: '''Caesar:''' ''[is looking at Bobo]'' A talking chimp?
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Don't bother. I've heard all the jokes.
: '''Caesar:''' Have they hurt you? Are you okay? Stand aside.
: '''Rex:''' Hello? Do I get a say in this?
: '''Holiday:''' If you're part of some elaborate plan to kidnap Rex, then you failed.
: '''Caesar:''' Listen, bonita, you don't wanna make me use this.
: '''Rex:''' ''[gets in between them]'' Enough! Normally around here when someone barges in talking crazy, they get around into the deck plates by my giant fists. But you seem legit. I'm going with him.
: '''Holiday:''' Rex!
: '''Rex:''' Okay, brother. Lead the way. So if you are my brother, where have you been all this time?
: '''Caesar:''' I'll explain later when we're safe.
: '''Rex:''' Uh, this is Providence. We are safe. Usually.
: '''Caesar:''' Providence? Never heard of it. To be honest, the last five years has been a bit of a blur.
: '''Rex:''' I want to believe you, but I'm gonna need some proof.
: '''Caesar:''' Your name is Rex Salazar. Our parents are Violetta and Raphael. The last time I saw you was at the Applied Nanite Research Lab in Abysus; right before those fools triggered a replication cycle.
: '''Rex:''' And I have total amnesia so, for all I know, that could be completely bogus.
: '''Caesar:''' There's a scar on the back of your left knee you got when you were seven, riding the gantry arm in the reactor annex.
: '''Rex:''' Hmm. I always wondered how I got that.
:''[they go out and Rex notices Caesar Salazar's pod laboratory]''
: '''Rex:''' Whoa. Nice wheels.
: '''Six:''' ''[Comes out and unsheathed his swords]'' Don't even think about it.
: ''[Caesar is about to attack but Rex stops him]''
: '''Rex:''' It's okay. Six isn't going to hurt you. Right, Six? You're comming in a little late on this, but, uh, this is Caesar, my brother, and he wants to get me out of here. So, let's just let my brother have his way and see where this all goes. Wherever you plan on going, they're going to follow us. You know that, right?
: '''Caesar:''' They can try.
: '''Rex:''' I don't know. Providence ship are pretty fast.
: '''Six:''' Track Rex's bio signature and find out who that guy really is.
: '''Rex:''' You ain't kidding. This thing moves fast. A-are we in the arctic?
: '''Caesar:''' How do you think I got to your location so quickly once the locator signaled me?
: '''Rex:''' Locator? You sent me the schematics to build that thing? It tried to crush me like a bug!
: '''Caesar:''' Sorry, mijo. I wasn't really trying to hurt. ''[scans Rex's body]'' I was looking for what's hiding inside of you. ''[showing Rex the result]'' The Omega One Nanite.
: '''Rex:''' That thing? Holiday discovered it before. We had no idea what it was.
: '''Caesar:''' I sent signal instructions for the Omega One to track and contain. But since the nanite has integrated into your DNA, you became the conduit for building the machine. What I don't get is how the Omega One got inside of you. Rylander was supposed to have that under lock and key.
: '''Rex:''' Rylander? He's the one who put it inside me.
: '''Caesar:''' Why would he do a thing like that? I'm really gonna have to let old fool have it when I see him.
: '''Rex:''' Not possible-- Courtesy of Van Kleiss.
: '''Caesar:''' Van Kleiss?! What does that third-rate lab hack have to do with this?
: '''Rex:''' What? I guess I’m not the only one who needs an update. Where have you been?
: '''Caesar:''' It's a long story-- actually, short by my clock. A splinter group had formed at the lab. They had other ideas about how the nanites would be used. We tried to stop them, and you were hurt. The only way to save your life was an infusion of nanites. It was risky, but it worked. We thought that'd be enough to stop the others, make them see the right path. But we were wrong. Mom and Dad were in the reactor. As for me, I managed to escape in my lab. But the shock wave, the same shock wave that probably blanked your memory.... also interfered with engine that powers this pod. I was stuck in sub-light drive.
: '''Rex:''' How long?
: '''Caesar:''' Fifteen minutes. That's how long it took me to reboot the system. But at the speed I was going, it was 5 years of your time. I knew there was an accident, but I had no idea how bad. My nanite sensors were off the charts. My 1st priority was to insure the OM-1 was safe. That was our promise. And here we are. So, what have I missed these past five years?
: '''Rex:''' Providence? We need to talk. They can wait.
: '''Caesar:''' So let me understand, there are EVOs and Van Kleiss claimed as their leader?
: '''Rex:''' Well, not for all of them, yet. I want to know about me, about our parents.
: '''Caesar:''' They were scientists. We lived all over the world. Things settled down when you came along. That was in Geneva.
: '''Rex:''' Wait a second. Are you saying I'm Swiss?
: ''Caesar:'' Not really. Mother was born in Mexico City. Father in Buenos Aires.
: '''Rex:''' And they're really... gone? ''[Caesar slowly nods sadly]''
: '''Rex:''' Um, where exactly did this ship take us?
: '''Caesar:''' What do you know?We're back at the original lab site.
: '''Rex:''' You mean the one in Abysus?
: '''Caesar:''' Is that a problem?
: '''Rex:''' I'd say just a small one. We should go, like now.
: '''Caesar:''' ''[typing]'' Hmm... Must be low on charge.  ''[walks out the door]'' We may be stuck, but on the bright side, I can take a look at some of these variegated organisms. ''[goes out]''
: '''Rex:''' Caesar! Wait!
: ''[outside and observing the EVOs]''
: '''Caesar:''' Fascinating. We theorized mutations might occur but never anything this random.
: ''[Rex hits the EVO before they got near Caesar]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Sorry, bro, but these guys--
: ''[Rex hits another EVO]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Usually don't sit still for questions.
: '''Caesar:''' ''[seeing Rex's new build]'' Hmm... That's new.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Guess I've learned a--
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' A few tricks. But they still won't be enough if Van Kleiss shows up with all his goons. Six!
: '''Six:'''We're locked onto you. The keep is already on its way.
: '''Rex:''' Your ship may be out of juice, but I'm not. Hop on. I can get us out of here.
: '''Caesar:''' I won't leave my lab, and you definitely don't want Van Kleiss getting his hands on some of the things in here. I'll try to reroute the capacitors to an alternate power source.
: '''Caesar:''' Oh, you wanna see a photo of you, me, and papi? Maybe later.
: '''Rex:''' You're a little off, aren't you, Caesar? 
: '''Biowulf:''' What was that machine it flew off with?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' A laboratory. One I thought I'd never see again. It seems an old friend has returned-Caesar.
: '''Rex:''' Providence isn't so bad now, eh, hermano?
: '''Caesar:''' Is this a Grinnell? They always made good consoles, except for the random power surges.
: '''Six:''' Well?
: '''Rex:''' Everything's cool. He's a little kooky, but I'm pretty sure he's my brother.
: '''Six:''' Glad to hear it. Now I need you back. We still have some unfinished business.
: '''Rex:''' Got to get back to work.
: '''Caesar:''' My little brother, the hero. I remember when you just wanted to be a musician.
: '''Rex:''' Guitar? No, wait drums.
: '''Caesar:''' Accordion.
: '''Rex:''' You got to be kidding me!
: '''Six:''' As I recall, you started it.
: '''Rex:''' Huh?
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Six:''' The EVO is dividing faster than we can contain it. The city is being evacuated.
: '''Caesar:''' Hmm. Excuse me, admiral. I need you to take me down there immediately. Afraid I'll have to insist.
: '''Six:''' Rex!
: '''Rex:''' Are you crazy?!
: '''Caesar:''' Depends on who you ask. I had something in my lab that I thought could help.
: '''Six:''' Help? You're not even supposed to be outside the keep.
: '''Rex:''' WHOO-HOO! Way to go, bro! First day on the job, and you already got a save!
: '''Six:''' Job?
: '''Rex:''' Oh, come on, admit it, Six. He just saved our chicharrones.
: ''[Caesar laughs]''
: '''Rex:''' What? What's so funny?
: '''Caesar:''' You always make me laugh when you try to speak Spanish.
: '''Holiday:''' We've pulled his records, and I've confirmes his DNA. It seems Rex really does have a brother.
: '''White Knight:''' If everything I've read about him is true, he could be an incredible asset to Providence.
: '''Six:''' Or a major liability.
: '''White Knight:''' All the more reason to keep him with us. Give him whatever he needs.
: '''Holiday:''' White's right, Six. He knows more about nanites than anyone on the planet. He helped invent them.
: '''Six:''' My point exactly. He's settling in?
: '''Rex:''' I guess so. Caesar's a little strange. Hard to believe he's actually my brother.
: '''Six:''' I'm happy for you, Rex. You always said you wanted to find your family.
: '''Rex:''' Thanks, but... You know that? I already did. Caesar may be my brother, but you, Holiday, Bobo, you're who I have a connection with.
: '''Bobo:''' Aww, now, see, I'm getting all misty.
: '''Caesar:''' There you are. Hmm. Nice view. Say, mijo, you think your cafeteria could whip up a pizza with pineapple and salmon? I've been craving one for days.
: '''Bobo:''' Connection, huh?

===Outpost===
:'''Alvarez:''' Did you hear that? Aah!
:'''Providence Agent:''' Alvarez!
:'''Valentina:''' He will be fine in a few hours.
:'''Providence Agent:''' Drop it.
:'''Valentina:''' I was planning to.
:''[Alvarez grunts]''
:'''Providence Agent:''' They are free.
:'''Valentina:''' Muy bueno. Providence is now at war with the Green Fist!
:'''Rex:''' Come on, doc. Are you serious? Another one? Ouch!
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Oh, this is really necessary.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The rainforest is rife with diseases, poisonous insects, and worse. I don't want you coming down with anything.
:'''White Knight:''' Is he ready to go?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' As ready as he'll ever be.
:'''Rex:''' He's wondering how come Six doesn't have to get a shot if he's also going?
:'''White Knight:''' Six is still in New Zealand, dealing with a... Small problem.
:'''Rex:''' Oh sure. Let him deal with the small stuff. While I do all the hard work.
:'''White Knight:''' ''[to Rex]'' We don't have time to wait for him. You're going solo.
:'''Bobo:''' Hey! Where he goes, I go.
:'''White Knight:''' Like I said-- Solo. Now, this Green Fist group have been stealing EVOs all over South America. We believe they will hit Corazon de Selva next.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The Providence station there has just captured a large batch of EVOs in the jungle.
:'''Rex:''' Bobo and I are ready to roll.
:'''White Knight:''' Be careful. For all we know, the Green Fist could  be selling EVOs to Van Kleiss.
:'''Bobo:''' I'm ready for carnival! Let's party!
:''[White Knight clears throat]''
:'''White Knight:''' The situation down there is... complex. I need both of you to handle the mission quietly and with diplomacy.
:'''Rex:''' I can be diplomatic. Oh, by the way, you might want to think about switching to low-fat, White. Starting to look at little... Jowly.
:'''Bobo:''' Better leave the diplomacy to the small one.
:'''Rex:''' This is the town?
:'''Bobo:''' Something tells me they're not in the mood to party. Maybe a knock-knock joke would lighten things up?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' You must be Rex.
:'''Rex:''' You're Agent Martrello?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' You may call me &quot;Oso&quot;, my friend.
:'''Rex:''' White Knight said to send his regards.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Maybe he could come visit sometime, get some sun, see what it's like on the front lines nowadays? ''[laughing. Then to Bobo]'' This must be the monkey. He does tricks? Hello, señor Bobo.
:'''Bobo:''' ''[puts his palm to Oso's mouth]'' That's &quot;Agent Haha&quot; to you, buddy.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Come. The station is not fair.
:'''Bobo:''' Doesn't anybody mow the grass around here?
:''[Oso Maretelo chuckles]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Often. But the jungle can only be kept at bay, not subdued.
:''[Oso Maretelo grunting]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' There we go.
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Apologies. The air-conditioning is down again.
:'''Bobo:''' Makes our place look like the penthouse suite.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' But who needs air-conditioning? We're here to work! The kennel is this way. Most of these EVOs we brought in last week from deep in the jungle. A tempting target for the Green Fist.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa. It's packed in here! What are you gonna do with all of them?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' The big ones are shipped to larger facilities, like yours. These smaller ones stay here. They're really quite harmless, but the world wants EVOs captured, so we keep them. Oh, careful! This EVO is not like the rest. Took down six of my agents before we caught it.
:'''Rex:''' Is it really tiny or something?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' That's strange. He was here this morning, he can't have escaped. Aah!
:'''Bobo:''' Peekaboo.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Aah!
:'''Bobo:''' Yah!
:'''Rex:''' You all right there, buddy?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' I think you've both earned that cold drink you wanted.
:'''Rex:''' See? This gig isn't so bad. Cold drinks, fringe benefits.
:'''Bobo:''' It's on the fringe, all right, but I don't see the benefit.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Drink, Agent Haha. Horchata, the rice milk, is good for you. Besides... It's all they serve here.
:'''Rex:''' I think it's pretty good, but how come we can't get any service?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' We're Providence. All they know is when there's trouble, Providence is there. Our relationship with them is, uh, complex.
:'''Rex:''' Complex? We protect them from EVOs. You know, this calls for a little diplomacy.
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, brother.
:'''Rex:''' Excuse me.
:'''Waitress:''' ¿Sí?
:'''Rex:''' Uh... Uh...
:''[Waitress chuckles]''
:'''Waitress:''' You don't look like the usual Providence soldiers.
:'''Rex:''' That's 'cause I'm not. Name's Rex. Maybe you've seen me on the news?
:'''Waitress:''' No.
:'''Rex:''' Uh, what's that?
:'''Waitress:''' The horchata anejo. It's aged. Muy sabrosa.
:'''Rex:''' I'll take a pitcher of that.
:'''Waitress:''' We only make one pitcher a night. They have it.
:'''Rex:''' Hey, mind if I try some?
:'''Valentina:''' It's too strong for you, gringo.
:'''Rex:''' Gringo? So Mexicano!
:'''Valentina:''' Y tambien eres Providencia. Okay. Let's see if you can handle it.
:'''Rex:''' Gracias.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex gulps]''
:'''Rex:''' Ugh! That's good! Smooth!
:''[Rex gagging]''
:''[Oso Maratelo laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' ''[after taking a drink]'' I don't get what makes it so special.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' It's made from rice that's passed through the digestive system of a monkey.
:''[Rex spits his drink]''
:''[Valentina growls]''
:''[Biruta grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa!
:''[Woman gasps]''
:''[Woman grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Woman:''' Aah!
:'''Old Man:''' Aah!
:'''Man:''' Aah!
:'''Biruta:''' Aah!
:'''Rex:''' I can't use my EVO powers against them! I don't want to hurt these people!
:'''Bobo:''' I wish they felt the same about us!
:'''Rex:''' Oso, you know how to use one of those?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' The lariat? Oh, yes. I grew up roping steer on my Uncle's Rancho.
:'''Bobo:''' Rex!
:'''Biruta:''' El es un EVO!
:''[Valentina sighs]''
:''[Oso Maretelo laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' So, what do you think of that? Aah!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Waitress:''' ''[tossing Rex, Bobo and Martello out the bar]'' You are like the other Providence agents-- Bad for business!
:''[Oso Maretelo laughs]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' This is where diplomacy gets you, my young friend. Now, are you up for a stakeout?
:'''Bobo:''' Not me! I'm out of with this town and these ungrateful people. I'm going home.
:'''Rex:''' But, Bobo, we need you for a special undercover mission?
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Please, Agent Haha. You are the key to the entire operation.
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, yeah? Well, you could have said that before.
:''[Oso Maretelo laughs]''
:''[Bobo grunting]''
:'''Biruta:''' Quiet! I'm trying to free you from Providence!
:'''Bobo:''' I am Providence, dummy.
:''[Biruta grunts]''
:''[Oso Maretelo laughs]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' These toys of yours-- They're for children!
:''[Biruta grunts]''
:''[Valentina grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Who're you working for?
:''[Valentina grunts]''
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' You?! Horchata girl?! What do you think you're doing?!
:'''Valentina:''' I'm feeding all your prisoners, creep!
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Aah!
:''[Bobo groans]''
:'''Bobo:''' Whoa!
:'''Rex:''' Scratch marks? Weird. What the heck did this?
:''[Valentina screams]''
:'''Valentina:''' Huh? Aah!
:'''Rex:''' Take a number! I have business with the señorita first. Aah!
:''[Valentina grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Aah!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Bobo:''' Hyah!
:'''Valentina:''' Aah!
:'''Bobo:''' Yeah, and stay down!
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Rex, you okay?
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' I feel... fine. I hope Holiday gave me a shop or whatever that was.
:'''Valentina:''' For the last time, we don't work for Van Kleiss! The Green Fist fights for the EVOs who cannot fight for themselves. We set them free-- Nothing more.
:''[Bobo snorts]''
:'''Bobo:''' Just what we need-- Humans for ethical treatment of EVOs.
:'''Valentina:''' Ugh! We were returning them to their natural habitat! What Providence does is wrong and against the natural order of things! ''[to Rex]'' You're a traitor to your own kind!
:'''Rex:''' That thing you set free-- It's natural order is to exterminate mankind! It wanted to kill you! Your men are dying because of it.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I wish I had better news.
:'''Rex:''' Thanks anyway, doc. We'll call with updates.
:'''Bobo:''' What did she say?
:'''Rex:''' The nanites in my system are fighting off the toxin, but that's only slowing it down. We need to make an anti-toxin, or-- or...
:'''Valentina:''' Or se va a morir!
:'''Bobo:''' In English! In English!
:'''Rex:''' It's doing to me what it's done to Valentina's men. If we don't get the anti-toxin soon, they'll die, and, eventually, I will, too.
:'''Bobo:''' Think I liked it better in Spanish.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' If I can get a blood sample of that EVO with this, it'll beam its DNA sequence back to Holiday and she'll be able to instantly synthesize an anti-toxin.
:'''Rex:''' I want to go.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' You're sick.
:'''Bobo:''' Aah!
:'''Rex:''' I'm better equipped than any agent you have, and you know it.
:''[Oso Maretelo sighs]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Very well. You'll come with me and a team of my best men.
:'''Valentina:''' You're killing him if you do that. Listen, you need me, Providence man. I know that jungle better than anyone. Your big, noisy party will alert that EVO. You won't get within a mile of it. My men are dying, too. Let me free!
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' You think I'm going to let you just walk out of here alone?
:'''Rex:''' No. I'm going, too.
:''[Bobo grunting]''
:'''Bobo:''' Aah!
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Anything yet?
:'''Rex:''' Nothing.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Rex, once you get the sample of the EVO's blood for the anti-toxin, I'll pick you up in the jump jet. White Knight wants you sticking to his orders, nothing more-- Capture the EVO and bring back the prisoner.
:'''Rex:''' Gotcha.
:'''Valentina:''' Orders? Prisoners? You wonder why we're suspicious of Providence.
:'''Rex:''' We're protecting people. What we're doing is good. I believe that.
:'''Valentina:''' You think I don't believe in what I do? Who decides who's right-- Your White Knight?
:''[Bobo snoring]''
:'''Rex:''' All we found out here are goats from the village-- At least what's left of them.
:''[Rex groans]''
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Valentina:''' You all right?
:'''Rex:''' I'm fine. Let's just hope this trap works.
:''[Bobo snoring]''
:'''Bobo:''' ''[to the creature]'' Hey, pal, didn't anybody tell you the trap's over there? Aah!
:'''Valentina:''' We've caught him!
:'''Bobo:''' No! You caught me! Big difference!
:'''Rex:''' Aaah! That's it. No more running. Hyah! Ahh! Okay, time for more running!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Ahh!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Adiós! Aah!
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' The toxins are breaking down my nanites!
:''[Rex panting]''
:'''Valentina:''' Over here! Come and get me!
:'''Rex:''' Don't! It'll kill you! :'''Valentina:''' You're too ill to fight it!
:'''Rex:''' Look, put down the flower basket and trust me.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' On my signal. Come on. Don't you want a nice Rex burger for breakfast? Not yet. Not yet. Now!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Valentina:''' You caught it. You've saved my men.
:'''Rex:''' We caught it... Together. First my cure... Now his. I don't believe it. This thing... It isn't an EVO.
:'''Valentina:''' The fangs, the toxin... The goat! Of course! How could I have been so blind? This animal is a chupacabra!
:'''Rex:''' Chupacabra? Isn't that a myth, like bigfoot or the Loch Ness monster?
:'''Valentina:''' I thought it was only a legend, too.
:'''Rex:''' Providence must have come blundering onto its home turf and captured it.
:'''Valentina:''' So... What will you do?
:'''Rex:''' Only one option, as far as I see it.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Go on. Get! Get!
:'''Valentina:''' There are things in this jungle stranger than EVOs and older than man.
:'''Rex:''' Well, as long as they stay here, we won't have anymore problems. Doc, did the sample beam through okay?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I'm synthesizing the anti-toxin right now. It'll be at the base by the time Oso picks you up.
:'''Rex:''' He'll be here soon with the jump set. You better get going.
:'''Valentina:''' Your orders were to bring me back.
:'''Rex:''' I don't always follow orders.
:'''Valentina:''' Thank you. This still doesn't make up for spitting the horchata in my face.
:'''Bobo:''' Ooh, slick. If it was me, I would have kissed her.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' The anti-toxin will have you back to normal within the hour. Now, what happened with the woman?
:'''Rex:''' She, uh, got away.
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' I see. You're learning, my friend. It's complex. A woman like that-- It makes our problems with EVOs seem simple, no?
:''[Oso Maretelo laughs]''
:'''Oso Maretelo:''' Safe journey, my friends. I hope to see you again.
:'''Bobo:''' That makes one of us.
:'''Waitress:''' Wait! For your trip!
:'''Rex:''' Uh... Gracias. How'd I earn this?
:'''Waitress:''' I heard what you did. The chupacabra-- It stole my abuela's goat. Providence is going to buy her a new one. Thank you.
:''[Waitress smooches]''
:'''Bobo:''' Hey, if that's all it took to make you happy, we would have run off with the goat when we first came to town. Aah! Aw! Some thanks!

===Haunted===
:''[Noah and Rex are standing outside of a movie theater waiting for two friends to arrive, but have a small talk in the meantime.]''
:'''Noah:''' Not only is this a bad idea, Rex, it's just stupid. No, no. Not just stupid—outstandingly stupid!
:'''Rex:'''	Trust me, Noah, it's primal; scare Claire and she'll grab the nearest guy for protection, and that would be you!
:'''Noah:''' ''[from shocked to serious]'' And, that would be Claire and Annie.
:''[Rex turns around to see Claire and Annie walking towards them.]''
:'''Noah:''' This had better work.
:'''Rex:'''	''[with a tune]'' I know what I'm doing--
:'''Claire:''' Are you sure you want to see this movie? I hear it's really scary.
:'''Annie:''' So is a jar of killer bees when it's knocked off a shelf in biology class.
:'''Rex:'''	''[gives a strange look]'' Uh... yeah! ''[wraps arm around Noah]'' He's absolutely positive!
:''[Claire and Annie smile at each other excitedly. The scene then cuts to the four inside the movie theater, watching the horror film at a suspenseful scene, however an upsetting scene happens.]''
:'''Claire:''' Ew!
:''[Claire winces]''
:'''Annie:''' That actually happened to someone I know. ''[covers eyes]''
:'''Rex:'''	''[gets Noah's attention by throwing popcorn at him and winks]'' Wait for it--
:''[Claire groans and Noah smiles. The woman in the movie shrieks loudly and both girls jump to hug Rex.]''
:'''Noah:''' ''[crosses legs]'' Still waiting--
:''[The scene cuts to Providence, where Caesar is playing around with his inventions.]''
:'''Rex:'''	''[rex walks in.]'' Hey, Caesar!
:'''Caesar:''' Hello, little brother.
:'''Rex:'''	''[watches Caesar's invention]'' Whoaa... is that some sort of a nanite thing?
:'''Caesar:'''''[takes object and allows small tube to emerge from the end of it]'' Mango smoothie... but this... ''[shows Rex another device.]'' is my hyper-electromagnet that can disassemble a tank from a kilometer away. Mmm, and evidently, can also make deliciously creamy smoothies.
:'''Rex:''' Nice. But what I really need to do is scare a girl into my best friend's arms.
:'''Caesar:''' Oh?
:'''Rex:'''	Noah and I took a couple of ladies to a horror movie.
:'''Caesar:''' Ah, to engage their paleomammalian brain so the fear response would be to cling to the nearest male. Did it work?
:'''Rex:''' Yeah... but they both clung to me.
:'''Caesar:''' ''[wraps arm around Rex]'' I believe the word is &quot;score&quot;!

===Moonlighting===
===Without a Paddle===

===Written in Sand===
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, I need an uptade.
:'''Rex''': I'm right at the edge. Anything still alive in there is trying to get away from the sandstorm.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': It's not the storm they're running from. The nanites inside them are forcing the animals away. It's creating a kind of nanite-free zone.
:'''Rex''': Ha! We should call White Knight. Maybe he'll move here and leave us all alone.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': It's no laughing matter, Rex. It could be the most significant development since the original nanite event.
:'''Rex''': Yeah, yeah. Possible cures save the world-- Got it. I'll check it out.
:'''Bobo''': Hey, doc. You may wanna get a load of this over here.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Negative. The storm is moving in too fast. Just place a sensor and pack it in.
:'''Rex''': Hey. No. It couldn't be. Rex to base. We got trouble of the egomaniacal EVO kind.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Van Kleiss is here? Why am I not surprised?
:'''Rex''': I think the real question is, if everything else is in such a race to get out, why is he going on? 
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, wait.
:'''Rex''': Don't worry, doc. It's me. What could possibly happen?
:'''Skalamander''': RARGH! PTUH! They're nothing but dirt.
:'''Biowulf''': My senses-- Useless in all this sand.
:'''Van Kleiss''': This phenomenon deserves my personal attention. What we seek is nearby. I can feel it pushing against me.
:'''Rex''': ''[Rex emerges from the sand storm]'' Yeah?
:''[Skalamander grunts]''
:'''Rex''': ''[Rex kicks Skalamander]'' How about kicking against you, too?
:'''Van Kleiss''': Rex! You're not welcome here.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex''': Now, that hurt my feelings!
:''[Rex groaning]''
:''[Skalamander pins him to the sand, causing him to groan in pain]''
:''[Skalamander laughs]''
:'''Rex''': Aaah! Whoa!
:'''Van Kleiss''': If I never see your face again, It will be too soon!
:'''Rex''': Yeah? The feeling's-- Whoa! Mutual!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex? Rex, do you read me?
:''[Bobo coughing]''
:'''Bobo''': Okay, we gotta get outta here. I got sand in places I didn't even know I had places.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, if you can hear me, we're retreating to the safe zone. Rendezvous with us there.
:'''Rex''': AAAAH! WHOA-OHHHHHHH!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex coughs]''
:'''Rex''': Okay, Kleiss-- Go time! No EVO allies, just you and-- Whoa! Uh, sorry, buddy. Didn't mean to bring you along for the ride.
:'''Van Kleiss''': I don't need my EVO allies, when I can simply make more.
:'''Rex''': Don't get me wrong-- I love punching stuff. But anything you can do, I can undo better! We can do this all day. Or you can just spill it.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex''': Why are you causing this nanite-free zone?
:'''Van Kleiss''': How convenient it must be to make me the root of all evil. I'm not causing it. I've come to discover the source and destroy it.
:'''Rex''': This could be the cure to nanites.
:'''Van Kleiss''': And I live off nanites. What Providence calls a cure, I call death.
:'''Rex''': Really? Haven't we moved past this?
:'''Van Kleiss''': Huh?
:''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
:''[After Van Kleiss creates a scorpion EVO to attack Rex, it attacks him instead.]''
:'''Rex''': That is the funniest thing I have ever seen! Hang on-- I got to get this on video. ''[Takes out cell phone and starts recording Van Kleiss dodging the scorpion EVO.]''
:''[Van Kleiss panting]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': Something's wrong. I should be controlling this creature.
:'''Rex''': Stinks to be you. Huh? You ruined my shot!
:'''Van Kleiss''': I believe we've found something more interesting.
:'''Rex''': You like to point out the obvious, don't you?
:'''Bobo''': Don't get me wrong-- I love the kid, but if we don't pull stakes now, we'll be combing dust outta all sorts of places for years.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Too late. Hold on to everything that's not tied down. This is going to be a bumpy... ride.
:'''Six''': Holiday? I trust you're all right?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': I'm fine, Six. But Rex is still out there-- With Van Kleiss. I can't reach him.
:'''Six''': We'll prep a rescue party. Prepare to come aboard.
:'''Rex''': Hey!
:'''Van Kleiss''': This is not simply a nanite-free zone. Something is stealing the nanites from our bodies. If we linger here too long, we may both find ourselves defenseless against the other.
:'''Rex''': Well, then, we'd better blow this joint. And when I say &quot;we&quot; I mean &quot;me&quot;.
:''[Rex tries to escape and fails]''
:'''Rex''': AAAAAAAAH!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': If either of us is to escape this place, we will have to work together.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex''': What exactly are you suggesting?
:'''Van Kleiss''': A temporary truce.
:'''Rex''': An extremely temporary truce.
:'''Van Kleiss''': We'll work our way to the center of the nanite storm.
:'''Rex''': No, we work our way out of the nanite storm and get Providence in here to figure out what's happening.
:'''Van Kleiss''': Providence? They can't be trusted.
:'''Rex''': Them? Didn't you try to take over New York? And Europe? And the world?
:'''Van Kleiss''': You need to listen to me, Rex. Without a powers, you're nothing but a child.
:'''Rex''': Oh, yeah? Truce over! Okay. This is awkward. Hey, is it just me, or are you getting really dust?
:'''Van Kleiss''': It's happening faster than I thought.
:'''Rex''': What's happening faster? If you know something, you'd better spit it out, or-- Whoa! It all looks fossilized. Like it's made completely out of... sand.
:'''Van Kleiss''': Not only are there no nanites here, this is pure silicone. There are no other elements-- No carbon, calcium, hydrogen. It appears that this zone not only destroys nanites, but is--
:'''Rex''': Squeezing the life from the Earth. This isn't sand. This is me!
:''[Rex whimpering]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': These glyphs-- There's something familiar about them. Sumatran? Mesopotamian?
:'''Rex''': Less geeking, more escaping!
:'''Van Kleiss''': We need to find the epicenter of this maze. These glyphs may hold the answer.
:'''Rex''': Only if one says &quot;exit sign.&quot;
:'''Van Kleiss''': No need to panic, Rex. We have at least twenty minutes before fossilization-- Give or take.
:'''Rex''': &quot;Don't panic&quot;-- Says the guy who used to be dirt.
:''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
:'''Rex''': We're turning into walking litter boxes, and you're checking out caveman graffiti? No wonder I'm always kicking your butt.
:'''Van Kleiss''': You don't have an investigative bone in your body, do you? So strongheaded-- Just like your mother. ''[Rex is silent]'' No, you don't like that, do you-- That I know more about you than you do?
:'''Rex''': Skip the head games. Isn't exactly a good time.
:'''Van Kleiss''': No, but perhaps it is time for some truth. We may perish down here, Rex. Ask me anything you want about the past, and I'll answer it.
:'''Rex''': ''[looks at his own slowly fossilizing body]'' Sell it somewhere else. I'm not buying.
:''[walks away]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': Oh, so the great and powerful Providence has finally come through on their promise to help you remember your past.
:'''Rex''': Something better-- Someone who was actually there at the Nanite Event.
:'''Van Kleiss''': Aha. Your brother, Caesar.
:''[Van Kleiss chuckles evilly]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': I've been following you both very closely since his... miraculous reappearance. Even if you don't want to hear what I have to say, this one's for free. Do not place your trust in Caesar. He's not the man you believe him to be.
:'''Rex''': ''[creates his BFS and holds it at Van Kleiss' throat]'' What are you getting at?
:'''Van Kleiss''': Oh, no, no. That's not how this works. It isn't my turn. Quid pro quo, Rex. If you want to know more-- Why don't we start with something simple? Rylander's Omega Nanite. I know it's inside you.
:'''White Knight''': Status uptade?
:'''Six''': Still no fix on Rex. Scanners can't cut through the storm, so we're moving in to stage a recon.
:'''White Knight''': I will not risk everyone on board that ship for one agent. Not even that agent.
:''[Holiday subtly ends the call. Then to Six]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Whoops. Guess the satellite feed went down. Nasty sand.
:''[Six smirks]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Caesar? Wanted you to know we haven’t found him yet.
:'''Caesar''': Found who?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex.
:'''Caesar''': Right. Ah. Sorry. That was, uh, fifteen minutes ago. I've done about five hundred task since then. Try calibrating the keep's sensors to search for traces of Selenium. It's something Rex naturally gives off, like dandruff.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': I-- Really? Hmm. Okay, thanks.
:'''Van Kleiss''': So what you're saying is, the motor runs off of gravity and the only exhausts are atoms of selenium.
:'''Rex''': Now you. Squid Pro... Whatever. The nanites, the Event. What started all this?
:'''Van Kleiss''': He didn't tell you? I'm not surprised. It was Caesar.
:''[Rex pushes Van Kleiss to nearest wall and take out his BFS once again]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': Wasteful, Rex.
:'''Rex''': You're lying!
:'''Van Kleiss''': Hardly. Your brother is responsible for the most significant catastrophe in human history. You have to admit that as brilliant as Caesar is, he's... not quite right. Am I telling you something that you haven't already noticed?
:''[Rex groans]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex''': HAAAH!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Van Kleiss coughing]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': You seem to have awoken some sort of defense mechanism.
:'''Rex''': What are they defending? Rocks?
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': Before we're totally devoid of nanites, we need to end this now-- Together.
:'''Rex''': Back to back!
:'''Van Kleiss''': What?
:'''Rex''': Haven't you ever read a comic book? Back to back! No way. These markings-- They're not hieroglyphics. They're circuit boards. This whole cave, this valley-- It's one giant circuit board. These are data conduits-- Ms. Hubs!
:'''Van Kleiss''': You're right. These spirals are solid-state storage-- The standard design for a firewall in a CPU.
:'''Rex''': Did you just say I'm right? Now that I know what we're dealing with, it's a simple matter of-- Hacking in. This is malo-- Muy malo. Van Kleiss, meet the psycho computer who calls herself--
:'''Van Kleiss''': Zag-RS?
:'''Rex''': How do you know that? ''[Zag-RS notices them and attacks them]'' You know Zag-RS? How?
:'''Van Kleiss''': She was designed as a decontamination program at the original nanite laboratory. Her task was to destroy any rogue nanites that escaped from the holding tanks.
:'''Rex''': She did a great job. Whoever designed her should be taken out and beaten with a tendril.
:'''Van Kleiss''': Caesar designed her.
:'''Rex''': I'm gonna have to have a chat with my brother when this is over.
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Van Kleiss''': Focus, you fool. If we're to survive this, we have to use whatever nanites we have left to shut her down.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex''': No problemo! Ah, come on! Stay up! Show off!
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex''': Well, this bites.
:''[Rex straining]''
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex''': Didn't I leave you in orbit? Shouldn't you have burned up in re-entry or something?
:'''Zag-RS''': Re-entry resulted in a hard desert landing. This unit faced complete system failure. Salvation came from integration with the host space station power cell, where new initiatives were established.
:'''Rex''': Turning the world into a sandbox?
:'''Zag-RS''': Correct. The prevention of organic infection by elimination of organic matter and securing the Earth core system. Soon, this world will function without flaw.
:'''Rex''': Van Kleiss! Change of plan! While, I've got Zaggy occupied, you go and warn Providence before it's too late!
:'''Van Kleiss''': There's no time. Her strength is growing exponentially. To achieve victory, you must trust me.
:'''Rex''': Trust you?! That's comedy gold! Even if I was that big of a doof, neither one of us had enough power to fight back!
:'''Van Kleiss''': That's not entirely true.
:'''Rex''': Huh?
:'''Van Kleiss''': I've not been completely honest with you.
:'''Rex''': Stunned-- Really.
:'''Van Kleiss''': The Omega Nanite within you has a self-replicating program. You can create your own nanites.
:'''Rex''': What?! Why didn't you tell me!
:'''Van Kleiss''': A calculated emission.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex''': No way.
:'''Van Kleiss''': There-- That is the heart of Zag-RS. Strike while you can!
:'''Rex''': Oh, yeah! Now we're talking! Normally, I don't fight girls, but this time I'll make... A big... giant... robot exception!
:'''Dr. Holiday''': I found him, Six-- twenty kilometers northeast. There's a huge spike in trace selenium.
:'''Six''': Charge all weapons.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': The storm's starting to break. But please don't crash.
:'''Rex''': YAAAH!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex''': That's not fair! It worked in the movie!
:''[Rex whimpers]''
:''[Rex groaning]''
:'''Rex''': AAAH!
:'''Zag-RS''': You have miscalculated, human. The more nanites you replicate, the more energy you supply me. 7.5 seconds until I overtake your production.
:''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
:'''Zag-RS''': 4.3 seconds.
:'''Van Kleiss''': AAAAAAAAAH!
:'''Rex''': YAAAAAAH! One psycho robot down, one supervillain to chicken! Finally!
:'''Bobo''': What, you never heard the term &quot;fashionably late&quot;?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Your nanite-replicating function seems to be working well. Most of Zag-RS' alterations have been expunged.
:'''Rex''': Meaning... What?
:'''Bobo''': You ain't gonna wash away at high tide.
:'''Caesar''': This is my design.
:'''Rex''': Great-- My brother created Zag-RS.
:'''Caesar''': Evidently. Though her evolution into some sort of sentient nanite-slayer is most curious.
:'''Six''': Curious?
:'''Rex''': What about what Van Kleiss said?
:'''Caesar''': You mean I'm to blame for the original nanite event? Why don't we ask her? Wait! Interface protocols. Code designate Zag-RS. Respond.
:'''Zag-RS''': Dr. Salazar. Good morning. How may I assist you?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Stand down, gentlemen. Zag-RS has been successfully rebooted. But her memory has been wiped clean.
:'''Rex''': What? You got to be kidding me!
:'''Caesar''': That's interesting. Hmm. Van Kleiss must have implemented a program dump before he left you. It's the only logical conclusion.
:'''Rex''': Program dump?
:'''Van Kleiss''': Do not place your trust in Caesar. He's not the man you believe him to be.
:'''Rex''': Great. So now all we've got is a lame decontamination program with a GPS lady's voice?
:'''Caesar''': GPS lady? Hardly.
:'''Rex:''' I was making a joke.
:'''Caesar''': Don't you recognize it? When I programmed her, I wanted a voice that meant safety, protection, caring. Rex, this is our mother's voice.
:'''Rex''': ''[shocked]'' Mama?

===Night Falls===
: ''[Caesar's Pod Laboratory arrives at the town of Mexico City]''
: '''Rex:''' Are we there yet? ''[moving his legs and hugs his legs]'' All this futuristic technology and you never thought of adding a bathroom. ''[points at the monitor]'' City Hall! It must have a bathroom! Pull over-- Now! ''[Esteban writing some paperwork as the ground starts to rumble, He immediately ran outside looking at Caesar's research pod landing. The door opens and Rex finally made on solid ground.]'' Baño?
: ''[Esteban awkwardly points the bathroom]''
: ''[Rex runs]''
: ''[The elevator in Research pod went up and then down with Caesar]''
: '''Esteban:''' Caesar. ¿Eres tú?
: '''Caesar:''' ''[suspecting face]'' Esteban?
: '''Esteban:''' It's Mayor Esteban now.
: ''[Caesar laughs]''
: '''Caesar:''' Mayor? When you ran for class president, Maria Rodriguez got all the votes.
: '''Esteban:''' She was smarter and much better-looking. And I see you're still building your crazy contraptions. What brings you back to town?
: '''Caesar:''' To visit Abuela. It's a surprise.
: '''Esteban:''' You don't want to go there. It's not the same as you remember.
: ''[Rex righs]''
: '''Rex:''' ''[runs to the research pod]'' Okay, bro, let's go! ''[Rex went up to the lab]''
: ''[Esteban chuckling]''
: '''Esteban:''' ''[looking at Rex]'' Is that little Cabeza de Trapo?
: ''[Caesar laughs]''
: '''Caesar:''' I haven't thought of that for years. ''[Caesar went up to the lab]''
: '''Rex:''' What?
: '''Caesar:''' No es nada, mijo. We'd better get going.
: '''Esteban:''' At least stay in town tonight. You can head up to abuela's in the morning.
: '''Caesar:''' It's been over five years, Esteban. We're not waiting another minute.
: ''[Door closes and Research pods departs]''
: '''Rex:''' If she's not really our grandmother, why are you calling her &quot;abuela&quot;?
: '''Caesar:''' There may not be a biological connection, but she practically raised the entire town. When you were a boy, you spent every summer here.
: ''[Rex stops and feels incomplete]''
: '''Rex:''' I wish I could remember her. Or any of this.
: '''Caesar:''' I'm sure she'll be excited to see you. Just prepare yourself for a lot of sloppy grandma kisses.
: ''[Caesar pats Rex's hair and keeps on moving]''
: ''[Rex knocks at the door, The door opens by Abuela]'' Abuela, it's me-- Caesar.
: ''[The Salazar brothers show themselves while Caesar holds a Bouquet of flowers]''
: '''Abuela:''' Caesar! And is that my Cabeza de Trapo?
: '''Rex:''' Why is everyone calling me that?
: '''Abuela:''' What are you doing here?
: '''Caesar:''' We've come to visit. May we come in?
: '''Abuela:''' ''[Looks at the sky for a brief moment]'' No! ''[slams the door]''
: '''Rex:''' Maybe we should have called first.
: ''[The Salazar brothers spend the night in the Research pod with Caesar sleeping at the floor and Rex sleeping on the table. Unintentionally the computer sets thte alarm causing Rex to wake up a bit.]''
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Ten more minutes, Six. [''covers his ears with his pillow]''
: ''[Caesar opens the door and looks down, Seeing Abuela holding breakfast]''
: '''Abuela:''' Who wants breakfast?
: ''[Rex immediately wakes up]''
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' Yo!
: ''[Rex drops off the table]''
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Ouch!
: ''[After a few minutes, Rex picks up his breakfast]''
: '''Caesar:''' Abuela always was the best cook.
: '''Abuela:''' I have missed my niños. ''[Puts her hand on Rex's shoulder]'' Rex, I have been following your work with Providence, and I always knew you would be a big important scientist.
: '''Rex:''' So, why did you slam the door on us last night?
: '''Abuela:''' Oh, that. You just caught me off guard. We weren't expecting visitors.
: '''Rex:''' I thought you always--
: '''Caesar:''' Enough with the questions, little brother.
: '''Abuela:''' Let me look at you.
: ''[Abuela grabs Rex's face]'
: '''Rex:''' Mmph!
: '''Abuela:''' I can't believe how you have grown. Come, see-- The rest of the family.
: '''Rex:''' Does everyone in town live here?
: ''[Caesar chuckles]''
: '''Caesar:''' I remember evenings here, laughing, telling stories. And the food! Rex, if you thought breakfast was good, wait and see what abuela makes for dinner.
: '''Abuela:''' It is an old building. There are always repairs.
: '''Federico:''' Rex!
: '''Rex:''' Huh?
: ''[Rex chuckles nervously]''
: '''Rex:''' Uh... What's up?
: '''Federico:''' It's me-- Federico. Have you forgotten the secret shake?
: '''Abuela:''' You and Federico were best friends when you were little.
: '''Caesar:''' Cabezas de trapo!
: '''Rex:''' Why do you keep calling me that?
: '''Caesar:''' You used to put underpants on your heads and act out Lucha Libre movies.
: '''Rex:''' Glad I don't remember that.
: '''Federico:''' Lucky you.
: '''Esteban:''' Abuela, I must speak to you.
: '''Abuela:''' Someone has forgotten his manners.
: '''Esteban:''' You can't just keep avoiding me. My phone has been ringing off the hook. The village is concerned about the recent activity.
: '''Abuela:''' Well, it shouldn't be. What goes on here is our own business.
: '''Esteban:''' Not when it leaves these walls. The situation is getting worse.
: '''Abuela:''' We've made the necessary corrections. It won't happen again.
: '''Esteban:''' You got one last chance to get out of town. Or I will evict you myself.
: '''Abuela:''' An old squabble. You don't need to worry.
: '''Caesar:''' What aren't you telling us, abuela?
: '''Abuela:''' Time to start making dinner.
: '''Rex:''' Dinner? We just had breakfast.
: ''[Caesar chuckles]''
: '''Caesar:''' Trust me. ''[Stands up with his glass]'' To family!
: '''Rex:''' Is it like this every night?
: '''Federico:''' Pretty much.
: ''[Rex chuckling]''
: ''[The kid kicks the ball high, Frederico stands up and catch the ball and dribbled. Rex was impress.]''
: '''Rex:''' Hey. You're pretty good. Everything about going pro?
: ''[Frederico drops the ball, awkward silence]''
: '''Federico:''' Not anymore.
: ''[Rex picks up the ball, kicks it. The ball lands on the table splashing the food all around, everyones laughting. The bell rings and everyone starts going away.]''
: '''Rex:''' Okay, maybe not my best move, but it wasn't that bad.
: '''Abuela:''' Come, children!
: ''[Caesar and Rex follows Abuela to their room]'' You'll sleep here.
: ''[Rex notices Frederico]''
: '''Federico:''' See you in the morning.
: ''[Frederico darkly walks into he's room. Rex enters in his. In the room Caesar's unpacking, Rex looks around. Suddently Abuela locks the door.]''
: '''Rex:''' ''[to Caesar]'' Did she just lock us in? :''[Rex tries to open the door, fails]'' She just locked us in!
: '''Caesar:''' We need to respect our elders. I'm sure she had her reasons. ''[Rex walks to window, Caesar's trying the new bed.]'' Ooh! Bed's pretty comfy. Good night!
: '''Rex:''' But-- but... It's only 6:30!
: ''[Night, suddently a roar is heard. Rex and Caesar wakes up.]''
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' Sure, that's not weird, either!
: ''[Mayor's office, the phone start's ringing.Esteban picks up.]''
: '''Esteban:''' Bueno. I'm glad you cloud return my call. I understand you can help me with my EVO problem.
: ''[Salazar's room. Rex and Ceasar already dressed.]''
: '''Rex:''' Frederico? That's his room behind here!
: ''[Caesar grunts]''
: ''[Caesar pull's the door, they are still locked.]''
: '''Caesar:''' ''[to Rex]'' Can you break it down?
: '''Rex:''' How about respecting our elders?
: '''Caesar:''' Technically, I am your elder. Brake it down!                       
: '''Rex:''' I'll do one better! Hunh!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Forms Smack hands and punches trought the wall, making a hole that reveals Frederico's room.]''
: '''Rex:''' This place is just full of surprises. Okay, fur face, if you ate my friend--
: '''Caesar:''' Rex! Wait!
: '''Abuela:''' There has been a breach! Where is Rex?
: '''Caesar:''' I suspect halfway down the hill by now. Abuela--
: '''Abuela:''' I know.
: '''Rex:''' Whoa-- Unh!
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' AAAAH! Whoa! Unh! UAAAAGH! This is for Federico!
: '''Abuela:''' Rex! No! That is Federico!
: '''Federico:''' Are those your hands? Genial. I got out again, didn't I?
: '''Rex:''' So, you're like a were-EVO?
: '''Caesar:''' Lux Lucius Mutatio. Interesting.
: '''Abuela:''' Come-- We've got to get back to the house.
: '''Esteban:''' I told you this would happen! You can't control them anymore!
: '''Rex:''' It wasn't her. It was me. I let them out. I didn't know.
: '''Esteban:''' All these EVOs!
: '''Abuela:''' They're just boys.
: '''Esteban:''' Look at the destruction your boys caused! The people are tired of living in fear! You'll be leaving today!
: '''Rex:''' I'm sorry, abuela. I had no idea. And now you have to leave because of me.
: '''Abuela:''' I'm not going anywhere!
: '''Federico:''' We turn at sundown and then back at sunrise. It only happens to some of us.
: '''Caesar:''' I took samples from all of the affected family members. Everyone shares the same genetic code-- something similar to hypotrichosis.
: '''Rex:''' Hyper, huh?
: '''Caesar:''' Werewolf syndrome. The nanites triggered the dormant gene.
: '''Federico:''' Can you cure it?
: '''Rex:''' I can try. Strange. I don't feel anything. Do you?
: '''Federico:''' Thanks anyway.
: '''Caesar:''' I'm seeing no active nanite tracers whatsoever.
: '''Rex:''' Well, maybe it's because he's not an EVO form.
: '''Federico:''' I just want a normal life again. I don't want to have to leave my home.
: '''Caesar:''' Maybe there's a way you can have both.
: '''Rex:''' Sorry about the wall. Why didn't you tell us?
: '''Abuela:''' Because I didn't want Providence to know.
: '''Rex:''' But Providence can help.
: '''Abuela:''' By taking those afflicted away? No. Every night when the bell pulls, those that have the change are locked away safely. For years it has been this way and no one has been hurt.
: '''Rex:''' But-- You're prisoners in your own home.
: '''Abuela:''' You may see it that way, niño. But at least we are a family.
: '''Federico:''' You know-- Even though we got busted today, it was kind of fun to get out.
: '''Rex:''' Don't you ever feel cooped up in here?
: '''Federico:''' There is one thing I missed. Go-o-o-o-al!
: '''Rex:''' Why did you stop playing if you love it so much?
: '''Federico:''' One day during practice, I stayed late so some scouts could see me play. Sun went down, and, well... They made me quit the league after that. Still haven't replaced the go box.
: ''[Federico chuckles]''
: '''Federico:''' Is that Providence?
: '''Rex:''' I don't know who it is.
: '''Federico:''' We should probably get back. It's almost evening bell.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Rex.
: '''Federico:''' That guy just shot my ball!
: '''Rex:''' Oh, this is just perfect. Hunter Cane he has a thing for hunting down EVOs I already put him away once.
: '''Federico:''' So, what's he doing here?
: '''Rex:''' Guessing your mayor called him.
: '''Federico:''' No, I mean did, he break out or something?
: '''Rex:''' Don't know. Don't care.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Why am I not surprised? This one of them?
: '''Rex:''' Bringing this guy here was a bad move.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' For them? And I get to settle an old score while I'm at it. Lucky me.
: '''Rex:''' No-- Lucky me!
: '''Federico:''' Rex, we've gotta go.
: '''Rex:''' You don't have to worry. This guy has nothing to sweat.
: '''Federico:''' Now!
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Well, what do we have here?
: ''[Hunter Cain grunts]''
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Esteban, my friend, I may not even charge you for this one.
: '''Rex:''' The mayor wasn't kidding. He sent an EVO hunter who likes to shoot first and skip the questions. We'll need every man, woman, and werewolf.
: '''Esteban:''' You were warned, abuela. You can live peacefully or we will bring you out.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' I didn't come here for conversation.
: '''Esteban:''' But you said it would just be a show of force. We run them out of town. No one gets hurt.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' I don't negotiate with EVOs or their families. If you don't like what you're about to see, you can head on down the hill.
: '''Rex:''' Why don't you join them, hunter?
: '''Hunter Cain:''' I never back down from a fight.
: '''Rex:''' Neither do I. You bring your magic EVO bullets, or is this going to be a real fight?
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Lucky for you, these are the old-fashioned kind. But they hurt just as bad.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah, that is kind of annoying.
: '''Caesar:''' Just hours ago, there wasn't any nanite activity. But now, it's like night and day.
: ''[Caesar laughs]''
: '''Caesar:''' That was my little pun. It seems the samples are reacting differently in the absence of sunlight. If I can only work out the photoreactive elements--
: '''Rex:''' I don't even think a cure will stop Hunter Cain. He'll never listen to reason.
: '''Caesar:''' I still gotta try. I think I can affect the change in the nanite programming during your nocturnal cycle. If I'm gonna cure this, I have to do it before sunrise.
: '''Rex:''' Not a Hunter gets to them first. I can keep doing this till you run out of ammo.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Fire on target!
: '''Rex:''' AAAAAAAH!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Note to self-- Don't give him any ideas. You have to let them out!
: '''Abuela:''' I made a promise to keep them safe from harm!
: '''Rex:''' Where they can't defend themselves? That's exactly what won't happen!
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Grandma, step aside.
: '''Abuela:''' I stand with my family.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Have it your way. I'll take all of you down.
: '''Abuela:''' You obviously haven't met my family.
: '''Rex:''' Can't believe we're not related. So, what was your big jail break? Nail pile and a cake? Exploding smoke bomb?
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Cold, hard cash. Not everyone at Providence is an EVO-lover.
: '''Caesar:''' Huh? Yes! Rex, we can reprogram the nanites to disregard the photoreactive coding of their DNA with a frequency-tuned pulse! That should allow you to cure them!
: '''Rex:''' Sounds great, but I've sort of got my hands full. Unh!
: '''Caesar:''' You mess with my brother, you mess with me.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Who are you? You an EVO?
: '''Caesar:''' No. I'm a scientist.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' AAAAH!
: '''Caesar:''' Your turn.
: '''Rex:''' Whoa! Whoa-ho! Wait! I thought you said you had to zap their nanites.
: '''Caesar:''' In a manner of speaking. First, I zap you. Then, you have your nanites through do the rest.
: '''Rex:''' AAAH!
: '''Caesar:''' Too strong. I'll make an adjustment.
: '''Rex:''' Adjustment? How about you wait for me to say &quot;okay&quot; next time? You're still here?
: '''Hunter Cain:''' When I said I was out of the disintegrator ammo, I lied. One left, and it has your name on it.
: '''Rex:''' Federico, I'm not sure if you can understand me, but it might be time for the return of Las Cabezas de Trapo.
: '''Caesar:''' I think I've got the settings figured out.
: '''Rex:''' You think? AAAH!
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Caesar:''' That's more like it.
: '''Rex:''' ''[Woozily]'' Okay. Let's give it a try. I'm not trying to hurt you.
: '''Abuela:''' Federico, mi corazoncito. Let him try.
: '''Rex:''' Maybe we have to wait for a sunrise. We- We made it worse. Now we stuck that way!
: '''Federico:''' It isn't him-- It's me. I can control it now!
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Doesn't change a thing to me. He's still an EVO. I'm gonna finish the job I came here to do. I'll wipe out the whole compound if I have to.
: '''Abuela:''' There is no place for your kind of hatred here!
: '''Hunter Cain:''' You think I'm afraid of you?
: '''Rex:''' I think you should be.
: ''[Hunter Cain spits]''
: '''Rex:''' Hunter knows how to hold a grudge. He'll come back.
: '''Federico:''' And we'll be waiting.
: '''Rex:''' So, this mean you're gonna try out for the pros?
: '''Abuela:''' I think it's time we all go out and live our lives.
: '''Rex:''' La familia!
: '''Caesar:''' Cabezas de trapo!

===Hard Target===
: '''Rex:''' &quot;It's Breach! She's-&quot;
: '''Circe:''' &quot;Messing with you, Rex. Did you actually see on her the other side?&quot;
: '''Rex:''' &quot;Well, no but...OK, why Hong Kong?&quot;
: '''Circe:''' &quot;Because it's on the other side of the world, because she's seriously messed up.&quot;
: '''Cricket:'''&quot; Kind of like our place.&quot; 
: '''Circe:''' &quot;Trust me. She's back in Abysus laughing it off with the rest of the Pack. Besides, I'm not that easy to find.&quot;
: (''Removes the white towel to reveal her shoulder-length black hair partly dyed a deep plum and having donned a dark gray overall dress'')
: '''Rex:''' &quot;OK, Rex. Bad intro. Take a do-over. Like the new look.&quot;
: '''Circe:''' &quot;Wow. A compliment.&quot;
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Skywdd:''' &quot;And that's when Circe goes all [[w:Siren (mythology)|siren]] and blasts the bus driver's pants clean off.&quot;
:'''Circe:''' &quot;Lucky shot. Hit the exact frequency of polyester.&quot;
:'''Tuck:''' &quot;Good thing his boxers were cotton.&quot;
:'''Rex''' (''uncomfortable'')''':''' &quot;Good one. Uh, Circe, remember when you took down that sea monster in Cabo Luna?&quot;
:'''Circe:''' &quot;Please, Rex, I'd rather not remember that right now.&quot;
:'''Skywdd:''' Geez, Rex. Buzzkill.&quot;
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' &quot;Stop it.&quot;
:'''Skywdd:''' &quot;What's with him?&quot;
:'''Circe:''' &quot;Breach lag. Let clean over his bedtime.&quot;
:'''Rex:''' &quot;That and my early morning snooze. By the way, you were right. Breach wasn't after you. She freed Quarry. Got this from the Providence security feed.&quot;
:'''Skywdd:''' &quot;Quarry?&quot;
:'''Tuck:''' &quot;He's lose?&quot;
:'''Cricket:''' &quot;Oh no.&quot;
:'''Circe:''' &quot;You saw Breach and came back ''here!'' What if she followed you!?&quot;
:'''Rex:''' &quot;Don't worry. If Breach were here, I'd feel it. She's here.&quot;
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Breach:''' &quot;Hey, girlfriend.&quot;
: '''Circe:''' &quot;Get out of here, Breach!&quot;
: '''Breach:''' &quot;But Van Kleiss has so been wanting to chat.&quot;
: '''Circe:''' &quot;Then deliver a message for him! &quot;
: (''Uses her ultrasonic bursts on Breach, who creates a portal behind her, knocking her out with her own sonic abilities)''
: '''Rex:''' &quot;Let her go, Breach!!&quot;
: '''Breach:''' &quot;Oh, sorry, Rex. She's gonna save my skin. V.K.'s tough on failure, remember?&quot;
: (''Teleports away with an unconscious Circe on her shoulder'')
: '''Rex:''' &quot;NO!!&quot;
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' &quot;Hold that thought. You can come out now. I got that creeped out feeling.&quot;
:'''Breach:''' &quot;Peek a boo.&quot;
: '''Skwydd:''' &quot;It's her!'' She took Circe.&quot;
: '''Rex:''' But not to Van Kleiss. You never went to Abysus, did you? You slipped her into your little pocket dimension. Let her go, Breach!
: '''Breach:''' And I agree to that...why?
: '''Rex:''' &quot;Because you wouldn't want Van Kleiss to see this. I'm thinking a trade is in order.&quot;
: (''Breach releases Circe, who is caught by Skwydd'')
: '''Circe:''' &quot;I hate you, Breach.&quot;

===A Family Holiday===
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' The pace of study has been staggeringly slow. There have been no significant advancements in nanite research since the original event. Simply put, Providence is not doing enough. What is required is not a military response, but a serious, thoughtful reaction, a scientific answer. The poor and afflicted deserve more. The world, deserves more. Let me introduce Diane. Mother of three. Diane has been diagnosed as incurable, a lost cause. Since then, she's been treated like an animal, locked away from her family... No hope on the horizon. Until now. At Moses Labs, we don't rely on tanks, guns, or secret weapons-- Only an unwavering belief that whatever science breaks, science can fix. Welcome back, Diane.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Happy birthday, little sister.
:'''Rex:''' Hope that I paid the bills. This is going to be expensive.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Caesar:''' Release the hounds.
:''[a door opens revealing some Evo hounds]''
:'''Rex:''' Huh? Whoa!
:'''Bobo Haha:''' Heh! I thought that was just a figure of speech. You're a sick puppy.
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Not cool, bro!
:''[Rex panting]''
:'''Rex:''' ''[Spanish accent]'' Agua, por favor.
:'''Caesar:''' Water second, probes first.
:'''Rex:''' No offense, but being a guinea pig is a lot less fun when it's you instead of Holiday.
:'''Caesar:''' Don't I run the biometric tests with the same efficiency?
:'''Rex:''' How are we related? Have you looked at Holiday?
:'''Bobo Haha:''' She ain't my species and even I know she's a hottie.
:'''Caesar:''' She is... very smart.
:'''Rex:''' Where is the Doc anyway? She usually can't wait to get her hands on me.
:'''Bobo Haha:''' Saw her this morning, looking pretty grim.
:'''Agent Six:''' It's her sister. Her sister's birthday to be precise. Holiday gets introspective this time of year.
:'''Caesar:''' Her sister? Oh, is she smart too?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Hey guys. Can't talk. Hangar!
:'''Bobo Haha:''' Ah, human dames. I don't know how you guys keep up.
:''[Dr. Holiday pants]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Thank you for coming, Dr. Moses. It's a genuine honor.
:'''Rex:''' Who the heck is that guy? Why is Holiday acting all fangirl around him?
:'''Caesar:''' It's Dr. Brandon Moses, the leading researcher in technogenic transmorphing! If anyone's going to develop a kill  for EVOs, it's going to be him!
:'''Bobo Haha:''' Now, that's actin' fan-girl.
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Not the worst I've seen.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Can you help her?
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Beverly would be an excellent candidate for my treatments. Have her transported to my facility.
:'''Rex:''' Hold up! I know you have a bunch of letters after your name, but curing EVOs is what I do. Some of them--
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Some you just can't handle, Rex. Dr. Moses' research goes to places you don't, so if you don't mind-- 10 minutes, then we'll be in the air. Thank you, doctor. I've earned 5 years' worth of personal time, Knight. I plan to use it all. 
:'''White Knight:''' I don't like it, but I like your sister even less. Go for your &quot;cure&quot;, Holiday. But if it doesn't work, don't bring her back.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Agent Six:''' What do you really know about Dr. Moses?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I know what I saw.
:'''Agent Six:''' You're not taking her to the doctor for a checkup. Has he handed you supporting data?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Why won't you let me have this? It's the first glimmer of hope I've had since Rex got here.
:'''Agent Six''': I think you've lost your objectivity. If you can't help her--
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' That's the point! I can't! I need this cure. If you won't help me, stay out of my way!
:'''Rex:''' Any chance she's right?
:'''Agent Six:''' Hope she is.
:'''Rex:''' But we're not going to sit around and do nothing in case she's wrong, right? Today you're my sidekick-- Not a fashion-challenged soccer mom blocking my mojo. If there's any chance of playing hero for Holiday, I call dibs.
:'''Security guard:''' Dr. Moses' inventions are not for public viewing-- Especially not by Providence.
:''[Security guard grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' That &quot;soccer mom&quot; comment really got to you, huh? When did science geeks start packing heat? Huh?
:'''Agent Six:''' Check the machine.
:'''Rex:''' I'm no engineer, but as far as I can tell, all this thing does is light up and go &quot;ping&quot;. They never cured it! This was a scam!
:'''Agent Six:''' Holiday's in trouble. Holiday, Moses is a fraud. There is no cure!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' What's going on here? Moses, what is this?
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Business, Dr. Holiday-- Big business. Now, if you wouldn't mind stepping aside so I can collect your sister--
:'''Agent Six:''' Holiday?! What's happening?!
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Or don't step aside. I'm good either way.
:'''Agent Six:''' Holiday! We've got our coordinates. Go!
:'''Rex:''' It's a hundred miles away!
:'''Agent Six:''' Correct.
:'''Rex:''' Hold on to your swords, old man!
:''[Dr. Holiday grunts]:''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I trusted you!
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' A bad trait, a scientist. But look on the bright side-- You won't be locked in a cell anymore. That was just... Shameful.
:'''Rex:''' Be the hero. Be the hero. Be the--
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' ...Zero. You'll be a lot less grouchy in a few seconds, pal. Half cured? That's new.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' They've got Beverly.
:'''Rex:''' You wanna talk to her?
:'''Agent Six:''' Now's not the time.
:'''Rex:''' And when exactly is. She needs a friend, Six.
:'''Agent Six:''' I... prefer to keep it professional. Keeps people from getting hurt.
:'''Rex:''' Dude. Take off the sunglasses. She's already hurting. If I were you--
:''[Six gets a radio signal]''
:'''Agent Six:''' If you were me, you'd have a lead. Get Holiday. Dust off in 3.
:'''Rex:''' Where are we going?
:'''Agent Six:''' Moses may be a genius but not because he can cure EVOs. He overpowers them-- Hypercharges the nanites with excess energy to push their transformations.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' That's why Rex only partially cured that EVO he stripped the EVO of its extra power. But at its core, it was still incurable.
:'''Rex:''' We learned something new today. Great.
:'''Agent Six:''' Gets worse. Moses has turned his tech into a cottage industry. He takes incurables and weaponizes them to sell to the highest bidder.
:'''Rex:''' Don't sugarcoat it, Six.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' How did you find this out?
:'''Agent Six:''' I called some former associates-- People who know things, things that good people shouldn't know about.
:'''White Knight:''' Question-- Why is my keep on an unapproved mission?
:'''Rex:''' It's cool, Knight. We're helping Holiday.
:'''White Knight:''' No! We had a deal! Return to base immediately!
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's over guys. I can't drag you down because of my mistake. I won't.
:'''Agent Six:''' Keep returning to base.
:''[Knight ends the transmission]''
:'''Agent Six:''' I said the keep is returning to base. I didn't say we'd be on the keep.
:'''Rex:''' You okay?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Hanging in there.
:'''Rex:''' Hanging in there is good. I don't like to see you unhappy, you know. I-I mean--
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I know what you mean. Thanks.
:'''Agent Six:''' Better luck next time.
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Jealous much, sidekick?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Who is that?
:'''Rex:''' Someone who knows things good people shouldn't.
:'''Five:''' Machine boy! Like the new ax? You owe me for the last one.
:'''Agent Six:''' We'll talk music later, Five. You have word on Moses?
:'''Five:''' Five don't lie. Your guy is running an auction-- Tonight.
:'''Agent Six:''' I owe you.
:'''Five:''' She's a lot more beautiful than you let on, Six. Try not to screw it up this time.
:'''Agent Six:''' You coming?
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' The EVO is the military ordinance of the future. We all know it. You drop one of these babies into your neighbor's backyard, and it's game over. But to get the most annihilation out of your nanites... you need me.
:'''Human EVO:''' You promised to cure!
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' My technology not only amps up their abilities, but, for an extra charge, will modify their behavior to suit your needs. What am I bid for this army of one?
:'''Agent Six:''' ''[Bursting in]'' I'll open with extradition for crimes against humanity!
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' ''[to his bidders]'' Wait! This is just a minor disturbance.
:''[Moses groans]''
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' ''[to Holiday]'' Do you know what you just cost me, all for one hopless wreck?!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Holiday hits Moses]'' Her name is Beverly.
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Then give sissy a hug.
:'''Dr Holiday:''' No! Don't hurt her, Rex!
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, sure. Handle with care. Whoa! Can you tell her that, too?
:'''Agent Six:''' Going nowhere?
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Uh, let's not be ''[chuckling]'' rash.
:''[Holiday slaps Moses]''
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' I'm gonna have to get you a dictionary. Rash will not help anyone, especially not Beverly.
:''[Holiday grabs Moses]''
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Who can still be cured.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Holiday drops Moses]'' What?
:'''Agent Six:''' ''[Brandishing his swords]'' No games. Truth or dead.
:'''Rex:''' Fight still going! Need assistance! Big time! Whoa!
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' I did invent a machine that de-powered nanites, almost. But the bonds and nanite particles were too strong to break. Instead, I discovered that I could reverse the polarity to its maximum, overpowering the nanites. It's easier and-- Profitable.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' But you did isolate the bonds? So, you can break them!
:'''Agent Six:''' Holiday!
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Ugh! Unh! Okay, I called hero, but I need some extra kick for my sidekick! Unh! Seriously!
:'''Dr. Brandon Moses:''' Time to earn a return on my investments! Kill them all!
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Whoa! 
:'''White Knight:''' I won't even bother telling you the trouble you're in. Catch those other EVOs and report to my office the moment you're back.
:'''Rex:''' What other EVO-O-O-O-Os?
:''[Rex turns around and notices the EVOs behind him]''
:'''Rex:''' Ooos?
:'''Rex:''' Think they got it?
:'''Agent Six:''' They'd better. We're busy.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Unh! Okay. That's the flux transponder. That's the nanite energizer. Don't you explode on me-- Not now. Aah!
:'''Rex:''' I'll hand the one crazed sister. You take the other. It'll be like a double date. Don't bother... your sister... while she's working!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I can see what he did, but... uh... there's no time! I can't-- I can't help her! It's over.
:'''Agent Six:''' Holiday-- Rebecca-- You are the strongest, smartest woman I have ever met, and the most stubborn.
:''[Six removes his glasses and looks her in the eyes]''
:'''Agent Six:''' You never give up. If there's a way to help your sister, find it-- now!
:''[Slight pause. Holiday smiles and puts Six's glasses back on his face then leaves]''
:'''Agent Six:''' That's my girl. New plan. Corral her to the machine.
:'''Rex:''' Plans are good! Yah! What you got, Doc?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Moses was right. The polarity of the nanite energizer is wrong! I have to amplify and reverse it. But I don't have-- Six... Your magna blades-- But it would be too dangerous. Six!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Six!
:'''Agent Six:''' Is it working?
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's working.
:'''Rex:''' Six, get out of there!
:'''Agent Six:''' You called hero on this one, Rex! Finish it-- For her! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Unh! Get them out, Rex-- Both of them-- Now!
:''[Dr. Holiday gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Doc! You gotta see this!
:''[Dr. Holiday panting]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[as she's trying to revive Six]'' Don't you do this to me! I will hate you forever if you--
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:''[Six coughs]''
:'''Beverly:''' Rebecca?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Beverly!
:'''Rex:''' That was... I'm... Wow! Six, I've never said it before and I'll probably never say it again, but... I'm honored to be your partner.
:'''Bobo Haha:''' Mushy stuff? Oh! Glad I missed it.
:'''Rex:''' But don't ever do anything like that again.
:'''Agent Six:''' Agreed. But you have to admit though... It was worth it.
:''[Dr. Holiday and Beverly laughs]''
:'''White Knight:''' We're not running a boarding house here. No more relatives.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I just need her for a few more tests, sir. She was only 13 when she went Evo, and she's in a fragile state.
:'''Beverly:''' Woo Hoo!
:''[Beverly laughing]''
:'''Beverly:''' Rex just took me on a ride through the Zoo on his cycle.
:'''White Knight:''' &quot;Fragile.&quot; Right.
:'''Rex:''' We're going to the mall.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Are you asking permission?
:'''Rex:''' No. I'm asking if we can have some money. Providence pays me nada.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Can I have a word with you?
:'''Agent Six:''' Sure this is a good idea? Could ruin your hero status with Holiday.
:'''Rex:''' It's funny. After meeting Bev, out of nowhere, it hit me that Doc Holiday is just a little too old for me. So, since I'm out of the way, I guess there's nothing stopping you anymore, huh, &quot;hero&quot;?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Well... right. I guess... I'll set up those tests.
:''[Holiday starts to walk past Six. Six takes a hold of her hand]''
:'''Agent Six:''' Or... we could get some dinner.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Outside? In the real world? Like real people? Like a--
:'''Agent Six:''' Yes. Like a date.
:''[Dr. Holiday gasps]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's about time.

===Hong Kong Nights===

===Whispers in the Dark===
===Cutting It Close===

===Exposed===
:'''White Knight''': All Providence personnel, this is a priority-one alert.
:'''Agent Six''': Do not panic. Remember your training.
:'''White Knight''': In all my years of working at Providence, never have I been put in such a situation. These interlopes could be anywhere at any given moment.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Hey, what's all the-- Whoa! Sorry. We're late.
:'''Bobo Haha''': You can't prove a thing!
:'''White Knight''': Watch what you say. Watch what you do. The very future of Providence may depend upon it.
:'''Rex Salazar''': So, what's going on? Van Kleiss attack in the HQ again?
:'''Agent Six''': Worse.
:'''Diane Farrah:''' I'm Diane Farrah, and for the first time ever, we've got an exclusive all-access pass inside the top-secret organization known as Providence. To uncover for our viewers, all the juiciest behind-the-scenes details of this most secret of institutions. And to find out the real story behind that man of mystery you've all wondered about for so long.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Aah.
:'''Diane Farrah''': All your questions are about to be answered. Welcome to Providence Exposed! ''[Camera closes-up on her face]'' On Ultimate Exposure! And cut. Great into, guys. Okay, moving on.
:'''Rex Salazar''': This is cool.
:'''Agent Six''': This is wrong.
:'''Rex Salazar''': How's my hair?
:'''Bobo Haha''': Delicious.
:'''White Knight''': Ladies and gentlemen, the delightful Miss Farrah and her crew have used the Freedom of Information Act to force.
:''[White Knight clears his throat]''
:'''White Knight''': To allow them access to a day in the life of Providence. And to ensure you are afforded the very best Providence has to offer, I'm assigning our top man as your personal guide.
:''[Rex moves towards the news team]''
:'''White Knight''': Six, please show Miss Farrah whatever she wants to see.
:'''Agent Six''': Agent Six is the name. On behalf of Providence, I'd like to welcome you to our facility.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Spare me the small talk. I'm here to ask the tough questions, and I expect truthful answers.
:'''Agent Six''': Shoot.
:'''Diane Farrah''': So.. is there a Mrs. Six?
:''[Combs her hair]''
:'''Bobo Haha''': Smooth.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Like you'd have done better.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Are you kidding? They want exposed. I'm going to give that reporter a piece of my mind and a few other pieces while I'm at it. I got stories that'll make them run screaming for the hills.
:''[Bobo Haha laughs]''
:'''Agent Six''': If you'll follow me, I'll be happy to show you one of our nanite research labs up close and personal. EVO control is our primary area of concentration, but Providence is focused on a great many studies. Each employing the best and the brightest our planet has to offer.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Thanks, Six. You know, this is my brother's lab. He's only like the smartest guy in the entire world. Yeah, being the best at what we do totally runs in our family.
:'''Caesar Salazar''': Not a good time.
:'''Agent Six''': That experiment is highly sensitive.
:'''Diane Farrah''': So, Agent Six, how did you become a Providence agent?
:'''Agent Six''': That's also highly sensitive.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Amazing story though about how I became a Providence agent. See, there was this big accident.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Good morning. My name is Dr. Rebecca Holiday, And I'm the chief research officer for the Providence Laboratory Facilities - specializing in the study of evology. Providence's number one priority is the security of our planet. And through the studying and understanding the forces that threaten us--
:'''Diane Farrah''': Let's cut to the chase, shall we, doctor?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Oh, um, okay.
:'''Diane Farrah''': How do you balance the threat of EVOs, the constant danger... with being a woman?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Uh.
:''[Dr. Holiday laughs nervously]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Oh, excuse me.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Speaking of studying, check this out. You can edit that, right?
:'''Diane Farrah''': We're all about the editing.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, maybe you could show these journalists some of your other duties, like what you're supposed to be doing right now, for instance.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Oh, man. That's right. Come on. You're going to love this.
:'''Diane Farrah''': EVOs come from far and wide for a chance to be cured by this young man. How often do you do this?
:'''Rex Salazar''': At least once a week here at HQ. When I'm in other parts of the county or the world, Providence sets up a mobile cure station. There are a lot of people out there who need my help. I only wish I could get to them all. Wait. Um, let my try again. ''[after Rex can't cure an EVO]'' Shut it off.
:'''Diane Farrah''': But this is really good drama, Rex.
:'''Rex Salazar''': I asked to be on TV. They didn't. Please give these people their privacy.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Come on, buddy. Everybody has an off day.
:'''Rex Salazar''': In front of millions of viewers? So much for everyone's favorite Providence man of mystery.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Well, they're just lucky they haven't had the camera on me yet. Oh man, talk about Ultimate Exposure. When I get through with them--
:'''Rex Salazar''': I just wish I could look cool on camera somehow.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Phbt! Good luck. The only way that's going to happen now is if some experimental EVOs busted out of their cages and went on a rampage so you could round them up and look like a hero.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Providence isn't known for being forthcoming with information. I hope this interview will change that. The people want answers and I fully expect them from you.
:'''White Knight''': Very well. What do you want to know?
:'''Diane Farrah''': For starters, how do you get fresh milk without any nanites in it?
:'''White Knight''': If you must know, it's passed through a powerful magnet that removes and neutralizes any nanite activity.
:'''Agent Six''': Observe.
:''[White Knight smacks lips]''
:'''White Knight''': Anything else?
:'''Diane Farrah''': Not at the moment, but I'll be back.
:'''White Knight''': I look forward to it.
:''[White Knight sips]''
:'''Diane Farrah''': So, Agent Six, what do you think about White Knight's obsession with staying nanite-free at the expense of human contact?
:'''Agent Six''': He's a man of many mysteries.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Look out! Coming through! Dangerous escaped EVOs on the loose! Stand back! Let a professional handle this!
:'''Diane Farrah''': Follow him.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Yeah, I'm kind of awesome.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Did you get them all?
:'''Rex Salazar''': How many did you release?
:'''Bobo Haha''': I don't know, three or four.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Well, which was it? Three or four?
:''[Rex Salazar gasps]''
:'''Agent Six''': Well then. Now that Rex's little demonstration is over, how about a visit to the Providence gift shop? On me.
:'''Diane Farrah''': How long has Providence had a gift shop?
:'''Agent Six''': Since 8:00 A.M. You want to tell me how a class by EVO got out of its electromagnetically-sealed container and just happened to cross paths with our tour?
:'''Rex Salazar''': It's not like this kind of thing doesn't happen here all the time. I just wanted it to happen this time, in front of the camera, all right?
:'''Agent Six''': Not all right. That last EVO-- You just helped it molt so it could grow. Its body is still out there somewhere, getting bigger.
:'''White Knight''': Providence is run like a finely tuned machine. Until you decide to throw a monkey wrench into the works.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Hey, pal, let's leave the comedy to me.
:'''White Knight''': And how is it exactly that these EVOs got out?
:'''Bobo Haha''': Okay, Mea Culpa. I may have accidentally knocked open a cage or two-- Or four.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': That fourth cage was electromagnetically sealed.
:'''Bobo Haha''': I didn't say it was easy.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': The EVO we had contained in there feeds on electricity. It must be kept away from any electrical current.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Then it sure is a good thing this whole place isn't full of electricity. Oh, wait.
:'''White Knight''': Find it. Subdue it. And most importantly, don't let that camera crew see it.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Eh, were wastin' time hunting this thing down when I could be on camera right now, giving those people a piece of my mind.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Hey, I only saw the EVOs empty husk before. What's the real thing look like anyway? Huh?
:'''Bobo Haha''': That.
:''[Rex Salazar grunts]''
:''[Rex Salazar grunting]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Any suggestions?
:'''Bobo Haha''': Can you make a soccer net?
:''[Rex Salazar and Bobo Haha grunts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Aha! Got you cornered now. There's no way out. You're overpowered.
:'''Bobo Haha''': You were saying?
:'''Agent Six''': You wanted to interview me. Now's your chance. Go.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Um... okay. Tell me, Six-- May I call you Six?-- What is the real truth behind the nanite event that created the EVOs?
:'''Agent Six''': That's classified.
:'''Diane Farrah''': What is your role, if any, in that event?
:'''Agent Six''': That's classified, too.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Are you always this talkative?
:'''Agent Six''': No comment.
:''[Rex Salazar grunts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Wait. Let me do that again. You didn't get my good side. Which is my good side?
:'''Bobo Haha''': Your backside.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Agent Six, you promised you were taking us to the heart of the operation.
:'''Agent Six''': Right. The heart of the operation. This way.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': [Watching from a monitor] It went right.
:''[Rex goes to his right. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Camera right!
:''[Rex goes to the camera's right]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': How can you miss it now? It's six feet in diameter and weighs five hundred pounds!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Less criticizing, more helping!
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Try to steer it in the direction of Hallway twelve. We can isolate it in the atrium.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Oh, we've got it contained there now.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': No, sorry. I was reading that backwards. Hallway twenty one.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, Hallway twenty one leads to the central core!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Okay, so, no big deal. That's a cold-fission reactor, not electric, right?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, all electricity is converted from something-- Wind, solar, hydro-- At the central core!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Ohh.
:''[Providence Agent screams]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Uh-hoh.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Rex, listen carefully and do exactly as I say because we're only going to get one shot at this.
:'''Diane Farrah''': One shot at what, doctor?
:'''Dr. Holiday''': The... future. Providence is the future. The future used to be the space program. Now the future is Providence and the science of EVOs.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Doc? Are you still there? We have a situation.
:'''Agent Six''': Just a minor downgrade of power during a routine relay check. Nothing to worry about.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Guys, I could really use some advice right about now!
:''[Rex Salazar grunts]''
:'''White Knight''': Attention all Providence Personnel, we have a Level-One Priority...
:''[Realizes the reporters are present]''
:'''White Knight''': Drill. Repeat-- This is our daily drill in the Central Core-- Now.
:'''Agent Six''': Lunch bell. It's taco day. Anyone hungry?
:'''Diane Farrah''': Agent Six, while we appreciate the commemorative spoons and the tacos, I can't help but think that you've been hiding something from our viewers.
:'''Agent Six''': Not at all, ma'am. Providence is an open book.
:''[Rex Salazar screams]''
:'''Diane Farrah''': Cut! You're ruining the shot, Rex. Just be patient. I will get to you-- I promise.
:''[Rex Salazar groans]''
:'''Agent Six''': Get down.
:''[Diane Farrah gasps]''
:'''Diane Farrah''': That was... what you did.
:'''Agent Six''': Just doing my job, ma'am.
:'''Rex Salazar''': And I'm just doing mine!
:''[Rex Salazar grunts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': You're not going anywhere now, buddy, except back to your-- Cage?
:'''White Knight''': We hope that you and the Ultimate Exposure team are enjoying our EVO containment demonstration, Miss Farrah. All part of readiness training here at Providence.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Can I quote you on that?
:'''White Knight''': Miss Farah, I'm not gonna stop you from filming, but for your own safety and the safety of your crew, please step back and let my people do what they do best. Alpha Team, I need a containment of the cafeteria, cube formation. Fire! Rex.
:'''Rex Salazar''': I'm on it.
:'''Agent Six''': Stay here. This is the real deal.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Not on your life. Find an elevator. We're missing it.
:'''Caesar Salazar''': Still not a good ti-i-i-i-i-me!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Okay, big boy. No more crawl spaces. No more Hallways. Just you and me in a big, old hangar bay mano y mano.
:''[Rex Salazar grunts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Huh?
:'''Bobo Haha''': ''[after Rex has been repeatedly beaten back by the Evo]'' Looks like you showed him.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Are you going to talk, or are you going to help?
:'''Bobo Haha''': Talk. Kidding! I'm helping! I'm helping!
:''[Rex Salazar grunts]''
:''[Rex Salazar groaning]''
:''[Rex Salazar groaning]''
:''[Rex Salazar sighs]''
:''[Rex Salazar groaning]''
:'''Diane Farrah''': Please tell me you're getting all of this.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Providence's man of mystery strikes again. Ow! It-- it bit me!
:'''Diane Farrah''': Quick, grab some B-roll footage before they get rid of all the evidence.
:'''Rex Salazar''': You did see that I did all the heavy lifting and Six just took out the trash, right?
:'''Diane Farah''': Don't worry. The camera never lies.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Yes!
:'''Bobo Haha''': Good! Then get a load of this!
:'''Diane Farah''': Do you have something to say?
:''[Camera zooms in on Bobo]''
:'''Bobo Haha''': Oh... oh.
:''[Bobo mutters then passes out]''
:'''Diane Farrah''': I think we have everything we need.
:'''Rex Salazar''': I don't know how you guys came off looking, but yours truly rocked hard. Just call me Providence's Man of Mystery from now on. Oh, yeah! Stardom starts in five, four, three, two--
:'''Diane Farrah''': I'm Diane Farrah, and for the first time ever, we've got an exclusive all-access pass inside the top-secret organization known as Providence. To uncover for our viewers, all the juiciest behind-the-scenes details of this most secret of institutions.
:'''Rex Salazar''': We are so dead.
:'''Bobo Haha''': Nice knowing you, kid.
:'''Diane Farrah''': To find out the real story behind that man of mystery you've all wondered about for so long.
:'''Agent Six''': Agent Six is the name.
:'''Rex Salazar''': They did it.
:'''Bobo Haha''': They did.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': This is a news show? What is the world coming to?
:'''Diane Farrah''': Look out, ladies. Agent Six is the full package -- brains, brawn, and--
:'''Agent Six''': Highly sensitive.
:'''Diane Farrah''': Just what is he hiding behind those alluring, dark glasses of his?
:'''Agent Six''': That's classified.
:'''Diane Farrah''': He's the Providence agent you women wanted to get to know.
:'''Agent Six''': Up close and personal.
:'''Diane Farrah''': That's right, girls.
:'''Agent Six''': He's The real deal.
:'''Diane Farrah''': And he's known throughout Providence as--
:'''Agent Six''': The heart of the operation.
:'''Diane Farrah''': He's the organization's best-kept secret, the ultimate agent, and--
:'''Agent Six''': The man of many mysteries.
:'''Diane Farrah''': And, yes, ladies, he is single -- or is he?
:''[Dr. Holiday laughs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday''': Excuse me.
:'''Agent Six''': No comment.
:''[Rex and Bobo Haha laughs]''
:'''White Knight''': Well, that's a relief.
:'''Rex Salazar''': ''[after the story airs]'' So, man of mystery, what's it like being a big star adored by women everywhere?
:'''Agent Six''': No comment.

===Touch and Go===
===The Siren's Lament===
* Flashbacks as to how Circe came to work for Van Kleiss.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;

===Grounded===
===Six Minus Six===
===In Dreams===

===Lions and Lambs===
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:''[Providence agents are standing in an industrial area, fingers on triggers. Rex flies in on jet pack and lands beside all the agents.]''
:'''Rex:''' Any sign? ''[Rex notices agents shaking in fear.]'' Alright then, who’s up for a burger, anyone? Tough crowd.
:''[Six walks up.]''
:'''Six:'''	These agents seem nervous. Haven’t they dealt with this situation before?
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, that's kind of the problem.
:''[Rex twitches, as if he is feeling Breach's presence.]''
:'''Providence Agent:''' Here she comes.
:''[Breach appears in front of them. They fire at her. She sends their missiles and agents away with red portals.]''
:'''Six:'''	How do we stop her?
:'''Rex:'''	''[Smack Hands.]'' Hit hard and keep clear of anything that glows.
:''[Breach has a collar around her neck like the one Van Kleiss wears, and a device on her chest like his only much larger and shackles are around her giant hands which look like Van Kleiss's bio-mechanical wrist. She opens a red portal. A giant jellyfish-like thing flies out at Six, then a large creature with a horn on its nose runs out. Rex jumps at Breach, she portals out, returns and the device on her chest starts sparking.]''
:'''Rex:'''	What's with the new toy, Breach?
:'''Breach:'''	''[Glares]'' Wouldn’t you like to know?
:''[T-Rex appears through a gold colored portal, sniffs Rex.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Seriously, where do you find these things? Let's see what you started out as, big guy. ''[Tries to cure.] Six? This... this isn't an EVO!'' It's an actual T-Rex! ...Six?
:''[Rex runs from T-Rex.]''
:'''Breach:'''	Have fun. ''[Leaves through red portal.]''
:''[Rex hides behind light pole, T-Rex pulls pole from ground, Rex falls to the ground.]''
:'''Six:'''	I take it this sort of thing doesn't happen all the time?
:'''Rex:''' Try never? This is all kinds of wrong.
:''[Rex makes BFS, runs at T-Rex; Six runs at T-Rex, jumps on and stabs it in back.]''
:'''Holiday:'''	Is that what I think it is?
:'''Six:''' You mean about to be extinct?
:'''Holiday:''' If you destroy the scientific find of a lifetime, it won’t be the only thing.
:'''Rex:'''	It's trying to eat us.
:'''Six:'''	You heard the lady. Take it down soft.
:'''Rex:'''	Easy for you to say.
:''[Rex lies on the ground holding the jaws open with Smack Hands and it slobbers on him.]''
:''[Scene change.]''
:''[Video of T-Rex in confinement field. The T-Rex turns to dust.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Breach is powerful enough as it is, and now you're telling me she can travel through time?
:'''Holiday:'''	However she's doing it, I haven't worked out all the kinks yet. That dinosaur reverted to its actual age about less than two hours after arrival.
:'''Caesar:'''	Photo and deep scan analysis reveals some very interesting technology at work here. Van Kleiss has really stepped up his game.
:'''White Knight:''' Skip the fan talk. How do we stop it?
:'''Caesar:'''	Until I get my hands on the device, I'm not certain we can.
:'''White Knight:''' We have to bring her to our side.
:'''Rex:'''	The only way she's coming here is if she does it willingly.
:'''White Knight:''' How do you propose we persuade her?
:'''Rex:'''	With me. ''[Six and Holiday stare at him skeptically.]'' I can be very convincing. Okay, okay. I think she might still have a thing for me.
:'''Bobo:''' Atta boy, work it on the crazy chick.
:'''White Knight:''' I don't care how we do it as long as we get results. Providence is under the microscope. It is the worst time for Van Kleiss to gain the upper hand. Get to it. Bring her in.
:''[Six and Holiday walking out of the room together down the hall.]''
:'''Six:''' ''[To Holiday.]'' I need a word. Something's wrong with White.
:'''Holiday:'''	Oh. That. He’s always like this, Six.
:'''Six:'''	No. This is different. I know when something is bothering him. The secret meetings, the anxiety. He’s up to something.
:'''Holiday:'''	I'll see what I can find out.
:''[Scene change.]''
:''[Rex on hoverboard, in Providence stealth suit.]''
:'''Rex:'''	WHOO-HOO! Works pretty good. After all, I built it. ''[Loses control of board for a moment.]''
:''[Scene change.]''
:''[Van Kleiss's castle, Rex hiding by entrance.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Going in. ''[Pulls up stealth mask, disappears partly, runs past guard.]''
:''[Scene change.]''
:''[Breach is hooked up to a large machine. Van Kleiss stands before her with a huge bank of controls and displays, spooky dark lighting. She screams.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' This is unacceptable, Breach. I need you to concentrate.
:'''Breach:''' It hurts.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Think of what I'm trying to achieve here. I cannot fail.
:''[Breach screams in agony and collapses.]''
:''[Rex looks down horrified, Van Kleiss grins, Breach screams and falls down.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I'll return when it recharges and we'll start again.
:''[Rex holds his hand out to her.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Why do you let him do this to you?
:'''Breach:''' Glory.
:'''Rex:'''	Van Kleiss's glory. Is he even noticing how you're tearing yourself apart for him? Have you ever heard him say thank you? What do you say we blow this joint, you and me? He's hurting you.
:'''Breach:'''	It's not real. It can't hurt you if it isn't real.
:'''Rex:'''	Breach, look at me. It is. I'm real, all of this is real. You don't have to live this way.
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	Why am I not surprised. Rex has come to rescue another of my lost sheep. Perhaps he'll try to save you next, Biowulf.
:'''Rex:'''	That depends. Is he housebroken yet?
:'''Biowulf:'''	I am no traitor.
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	You’ve no doubt seen our little experiment. Breach shows great promise. She just needs a little fine tuning.
:'''Rex:'''	Then what? Go back in time and be king of the cavemen?
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	Why not? It wouldn’t be much of a step down, now would it? Breach, if you would, remove our guest so we can continue. Practice makes perfect, or in your case, acceptable.
:''[Breach makes a red portal.]''
:'''Rex:''' Breach! Think about what you're doing.
:''[Van Kleiss grins, she runs and puts her arms around Rex, portals out with Rex.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Find her. Now.
:''[Mountains, snow, Rex shivering.]''
:'''Rex:'''	I'm glad you got us out of there, but where... are we?
:'''Breach:'''	When the snow is gone you can see forever.
:'''Rex:''' That's nice. Can we go now?
:'''Breach:''' I need to know if I can trust you.
:'''Rex:'''	You can trust me. I swear.
:''[Breach grabs his hand and hugs him. He opens his eyes. They are standing on a shiny endless reflective surface, reflecting stars.]''
:'''Rex:'''	This is different.
:'''Breach:'''	Do you see it?
:'''Rex:'''	Um--
:'''Breach:'''	This is where the stillness comes from.
:'''Rex:'''	You. Are weird. So what exactly does this mean? Are you coming with me or is this some kind of test?
:'''Breach:'''	I need you to see it.
:'''Rex:'''	Ah... A test.
:'''Breach:'''	Do you wanna understand?
:'''Rex:'''	Not exactly sure. ''[She glares, he waves his hands in front of him.]'' Yes, I mean yes. I mean--
:'''Breach:''' Follow me. ''[Walks through red portal.]''
:''[Another place. A door, a doll, a bear and a fire hydrant float in space.]''
:''[Rex hanging upside down, she is holding him by his ankle above a swirling pink vortex.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Ahh! What happened? I thought we were getting along fine!
:'''Breach:'''	Why are you here?
:'''Rex:''' Good question. Where exactly is here? Can we go somewhere else now, somewhere like, on Earth?
:''[She drops him. He screams and lands on the floor between some stacks of books.]''
:'''Rex:''' You sure know how to pick'em. What kind of tripped out dimension is this? ''[Librarian walks by and shushes him.]'' Oh. College.
:'''White Knight:''' ''[On communicator in Rex's right ear.]'' Rex, report. Where on earth have you been?
:'''Rex:'''	Apparently every place but.
:'''White Knight:''' I need to know you can handle this otherwise we're going to try a different approach.
:'''Rex:'''	You need to chill out, White. I’m making progress. ''[Rex puts his hand to his left ear.]'' Dr. Holiday, are you there?
:'''Holiday:'''	Tracking shows you’re with Breach. Are you okay?
:'''Rex:'''	Fine? Creeped out but fine. I can't bring Breach back to Providence, White would just lock her up and that won't help.
:'''Holiday:'''	Where will you take her?
:'''Rex:'''	I'll think of something. Just keep White Knight off my case.
:''[Breach appears behind him.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Why don't you let me pick out where we go next?
:''[Scene change.]''
:''[White Knight hands folded moving nervously.]''
:'''White Knight:''' He says he's making progress.
:'''Black Knight:''' The committee is losing confidence. They want results, not excuses.
:'''White Knight:''' Then that's exactly what they’ll get.
:''[Scene change. Rex sits across from Breach in a booth at a bowling alley.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Soooo, don't like bowling, huh? I figured with the extra arms you'd be a natural.
:'''Breach:'''	I'm not supposed to like you, but I do.
:'''Rex:''' ''[smiles]'' We're teenagers. At least assuming you are. Doing what we are not supposed to is part of the job. French fry?
:''[She takes it and then drops it.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Do you remember anything? From before you... changed?
:'''Breach:'''	I remember everything. And nothing.
:'''Rex:''' Naturally. Why did I even bother to ask. Listen, Breach. I'm not going to pretend I understand you, ''[Puts his hand on her giant hand]'' but I can help. If you let me.
:''[The machine starts to glow, they jump to their feet, other people look startled.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Nothing to worry about. Everything's fine.
:'''Breach:'''	I can't, I can't stop it.
:'''Rex:'''	Let me try. ''[He tries and it knocks him onto the floor sparking.]''
:'''Breach:'''	Van Kleiss has control. They're coming.
:''[Van Kleiss busts through the door with The Pack following. Raises bio-mechanical hand, palm of it glows, device on Breach's chest turns off.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Okay, do your thing. Get us out of here. Anywhere.
:''[she tries]''
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	You can't take what doesn't belong to you.
:'''Rex:'''	I didn't take you for the jealous type. ''[Rex shoots bowling balls at Van Kleiss with his cannon, hits Biowulf and Skalamander in the face and Van Kleiss punches the balls aside with his bio-mechanical hand.]''
:'''Rex:''' Breach, let's go!
:''[Breach rides off with Rex on hoverboard, Van Kleiss and Pack follow on three flying fish EVO's with harnesses and big teeth. They dodge and crash Van Kleiss into a window, and land in a park.]''
:''[Breach and Rex stand together on a footbridge looking down into the water.]''
:'''Breach:''' ''[Walks to bridge and looks at her reflection, Rex follows.]'' Will they hurt me?
:'''Rex:'''	Providence? Not if I can help it.
:'''Breach:'''	They did before. Ms. Smarty Pants—she likes to hurt me.
:'''Rex:''' I'll give you my word, if you come back to Providence, I promise no one will hurt you.
:'''Breach:'''	We can be together forever and ever. ''[She walks off bridge, ducks swimming in water.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Uh... something like that. What am I getting myself into? We gotta move. I bet my brother has already figured out how to turn that thing of yours off.
:''[The ducks fly off, they look and see a reflection in the pond of White Knight's ship.]''
:''[White Knight walks up followed by Providence fighter planes.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Uh guys, what are you doing?!
:'''White Knight:''' If you can't have something done right, do it yourself.
:''[They shoot at Breach, she screams, Rex is horrified.]''
:'''Rex:''' No! No! No! ''[walks up bridge to White Knight]'' Do have any idea what you just did?
:''[Breach's chest device turns on, she screams, Providence shoots at her.]''
:'''Rex:''' Is this what you wanted? Congratulations! ''[runs to Breach]'' Breach! Wait!
:'''Breach:''' Liar! ''[Throws red portal at Rex, he dodges, second one hits him, he disappears. Providence keeps shooting, she throw portals, drops three soldiers in water.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Agent Six!
:''[He jumps at her, she portals him away to behind Knight. Rex jumps from the water onto the bridge by Knight.]''
:'''Rex:'''	You had no intention to bring her in, did you?
:'''White Knight:''' I wanted to believe you, Rex, but this is too important. She can't be controlled.
:'''Rex:''' Control... Her powers are back on. Van Kleiss.
:''[Van Kleiss arrives on flying fish EVO.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	Settle down, Breach.
:''[Chest device turns off.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Let me do this. I can get through to her. Come on. It couldn't get any worse than you've already made it
:''[Knight and Six look at each other.]''
:'''White Knight:''' Form a perimeter around Breach. Van Kleiss isn't to touch her.
:''[A rock wall rises from the ground blocking Rex as he runs towards Breach. The Pack jumps down from wall to attack Rex, Six intervenes. Agents surround Breach, she tries and fails to make red portal. Screams. Van Kleiss flies in on fish, knocks down agents with bio-mechanical whip arm, shoots needles from fingers and knocks more down, fish knocks the rest down. White Knight shoots at Van Kleiss.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' If you had any idea what I was trying to do you might even welcome it.
:'''White Knight:''' Enlighten me.
:''[Van Kleiss touches a tree and it turns into an EVO. EVO tree catches and holds White. Six and Biowulf fight, Rex and Skalamander fight.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Enlighten you?
:''[Sticks his claws in White Knight, glowing White Knight screams.]'' All in good time, White Knight, assuming you have some left.
:''[Six throws a magnablade through Van Kleiss's bio-mechanical arm and he lets go of White.]''
:'''Six:'''	''[to White Knight]'' Go. I mean it. ''[White Knight flies off.]''
:'''Six:''' The name's Six.
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	We've met.
:'''Six:'''	Don't remember. ''[They fight.]''
:''[Breach on merry-go-round, turning slowly looking at the sky.
:'''Rex:'''	You're just using her.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Of course I am. She knows it. Spare me the chivalry, Rex. Providence would do the same.
:'''Rex:'''	Either way you slice it, she loses!
:'''Breach:''' ''[to herself]'' My two favorites. You both lie. Neither is real.
:'''Rex:''' ''[goes to her]'' Breach, I'm sorry. I meant what I said.
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	Words mean nothing.
:'''Rex:''' Then let this do the talking. ''[Turns on her machine, puts it into her power.]''
:''[Van Kleiss laughs evilly]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' You just handed her a loaded gun.
:'''Rex:'''	And now it's her choice how to use it.
:'''Van Kleiss:'''	Oh if only I had the chance to get through to you, Rex, to teach you how the world really works.
:''[Breach steps in front of Van Kleiss, raises her arms as if to send Rex away. Makes huge yellow portal above them.]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Our very first time traveler. You should be honored. Now Breach, if you wouldn't mind.
:''[Van Kleiss laughs evilly]''
:''[Rex closes his eyes. Breach sends Van Kleiss away with yellow portal.]''
:'''Rex:''' That was... unexpected.
:''[Rex tries to turn machine off but fails.]''
:'''Rex:'''	It won't turn off. I'm sorry. I, I didn't know.
:'''Breach:'''	Van Kleiss made it like this so I wouldn't send him away.
:'''Rex:'''	That didn't work out so well did it? Six, get everyone out of here now! ''[A big yellow dome forms around the playground where Rex and Breach stand.]''
:'''Rex:'''	So, what's going to happen?
:''[Rex and Breach are about to be engulfed by Breach's out of control time portal]''
:'''Breach''': ''[she looks up]'' I don't know if any of this was real. But it was nice having a friend for a while. ''[Rex smiles, Breach hugs him as they dispensary in the golden time portal]''
:'''Rex:''' I didn't get blown up. ''[Sees a lizard.]'' Whoa! ''[Jumps away, startled.]'' Oh no, please don't let this be dino time. ''[Touches earpiece in left ear.]'' Rex to Providence, do you copy? :''[Takes earpiece out and looks at it.]'' Oh... Rex to Providence, you better be there.
:'''Providence Agent:''' Uh... we copy, Rex. We have a lock on your coordinates and are sending a jump jet.
:'''Rex:'''	Is Six okay? Breach went supernova.
:'''Providence Agent:''' Someone's on the way, just hold tight. Providence out.
:''[Scene change, Rex lying on the ground.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Took you long enough.
:''[Turns over and sees Providence agents, pointing guns at him.]''
:'''Providence Agent:''' Rex is onboard. Heading back to HQ.
:'''Rex:'''	HQ? Ten minutes ago I was in the middle of an epic battle. You need to take me back!
:'''Providence Agent:''' Um, that battle is over.
:'''Rex:''' What happened? Is Six okay? Guys...what's going on?
:''[They arrive at HQ.]''
:'''Caesar:'''	Baby brother, you're okay! ''[Runs and hugs him.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Breach just sent me to nowheresville. Nothing to freak out over.
:'''Caesar:'''	''[To Providence agent.]'' You didn't tell him?
:'''Providence Agent:''' Our orders were just to bring him back.
:'''Rex:'''	Tell me what? Hey, when did you... have a beard?
:'''Caesar:''' There's no easy way to tell you this, hermano. Breach didn't just send you to the middle of nowhere. You've been gone for six months.
:'''Rex:'''	Six months?! So this is--
:'''Caesar:''' Technically, the future. I should warn you, there've been a few changes.
:'''Rex:'''	You didn't give away my room, did you?
:'''Caesar:''' As a matter of fact, they did.
:'''Rex:''' What?! Caesar, tell me what's going on here.
:'''Caesar:'''	It would be better if I showed you.
:'''Rex:'''	White Knight taking visitors now?
:'''Caesar:'''	I'll wait out here.
:''[Rex sees Providence agents dressed in black.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Nice suits.
:''[Goes into the office.]''
:'''Rex:'''	Ah... Love what you've done with the place. White?
:''[Person in chair turns around, it's a woman, not White Knight.]''
:'''Black Knight:''' Thank you, Rex. ''[She gets up and walks towards him.]'' It was a little bright for my taste. White Knight is no longer associated with this organization.
:'''Rex:''' He quit?
:'''Black Knight:''' He...attempted a hostile takeover and failed. Can I get you anything? Water? A snack?
:'''Rex:''' I don't want a snack! Where's Six? Where's Holiday!?
:'''Black Knight:''' This must upsetting to you. Change is never easy but from I understand, you've been in situations like this before. Everything's going to be fine.
:'''Rex:''' Who are you?!
:'''Black Knight:''' Someone very happy to have you back. Call me Black Knight.

==Season Three (2011-2013)==
===Back in Black===
: '''Rex''': Okay, I get what's going on here.
: '''Black Knight''': I'm relieved to hear that, Rex.
: '''Rex''': You can come out! I know you're there!
: '''Black Knight''': Rex?
: '''Rex''': We're friends, now, remember? Breach?
: '''Black Knight''': Breach isn't here, Rex. The world's changed. As soon you accept th--
: '''Rex''': No, I'm not ignoring you. It's just that you're not real.
: '''Black Knight''': I assure you I'm very real-- As is all of this.
: '''Rex''': ''[Chuckling]'' Oh, come on. It's been a fun time in the ol' Breachscape, but, you know, time to go home now.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex''': Seen this before. Usually ends with a black hole.
: '''Black Knight''': Rex, you're disoriented. Let me--
: '''Rex''': Sorry, non-lady. No time. Got an exit to find! Shall we aprehend?
: '''Black Knight''': It won't be necessary.
: '''Caesar''': Rex! Have you lost it?
: '''Rex''': Caesar! We're in a pocket dimension! It could collapse at any second!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Caesar''': That's crazy, Rex. This is not a pocket dimension.
: '''Rex''': You're right! It's a whole alternate universe! And-- and-- and you're my Brother's evil twin! Out of the way! Six! Six! Doc!
: ''[Rex panting]''
: '''Rex''': Dr. Holiday! Doc!
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex''': Wha-- Well, at least some things haven't changed. Whoa! Whoa! Okay, now I-- Bleh-- know I'm in an-- Aah!-- alternate universe. Unh! You can go ahead and -- Blech!-- Eat me now, please.
: '''Black Knight''': Release.
: '''Rex''': You were... saying something about changes?
: '''Black Knight''': There have been a few.
: '''Caesar''': You've got temporal lag, Rex. It's kind of like altitude sickness, only in time. Here-- This will balance your electrolytes.
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex''': So this is really-- 
: '''Black Knight''': Really. Welcome to the future, Rex-- Or, rather, to the present. Without your healing abilities, Providence has embraced a new paradigm. We've moved beyond the outmoded era of &quot;cure, contain, or kill.&quot;
: '''Rex''': And into the era of &quot;serious leash laws&quot;.
: '''Caesar''': We used the petting zoo as our test bed. What do you think?
: '''Rex''': I think it needs a new name, 'cause, you know, now it really is one.
: '''Caesar''': We've developed new techniques for working with EVOs. It's all about understanding them better.
: '''Rex''': So, you're some sort of &quot;EVO whisperer&quot;?
: '''Caesar''': ''[laughs]'' It's a bit more complicated than that. You sure you're okay? ''[sighs]'' It's good to have you back, brother.
: '''Black Knight''': Family ties. They transcend even time itself.
: '''Rex''': Caesar's not my only family.
: '''Black Knight''': I'll bring you up to speed on the others. When you went M.I.A., White Knight lost his biggest weapon in the war for EVO containment.
: '''Rex''': Figures that I have to vanish for him to appreciate me.
: '''Black Knight''': White became erratic-- some might say paranoid. Directorate lost faith in his ability to lead.
: '''Rex''': Directorate? I never knew white even had a boss.
: '''Black Knight''': There are, shall we say, layers. I was named as his replacement.
: '''Rex''': Let me guess-- he didn't take it well.
: '''Black Knight''': You could say that.
: '''Providence Agent''': White Knight! Sir! Stand down!
: '''White Knight''': I'd rather go down in flames than see Providence in the hands of the enemy.
: '''Providence Agent''': He's got a bomb! Fall back! All units fall ba--
: '''Rex''': Whoa! That was--
: '''Black Knight''': Your room.
: '''Rex''': Huh? Aww, man! But... Six... Holiday... where--
: '''Black Knight''': Where do you think? They're out looking for you. Agent Six and Holiday took indefinite leave. They've been off the grid ever since. I've attempted to contact them, but no response.
: '''Rex''': Mind if... I give them a ring? Not that I don't trust you.
: '''Black Knight''': ''[sarcasm]'' But you don't trust me. Natural, given the circumstances. Be my guest. ''[after Rex gets disconnected]'' It won't take long, to locate them. Meanwhile, there are many familiar faces who will be glad to hear you're back. Which reminds me... ''[tosses Rex a sack]'' This is everything we salvaged from your room.
: '''Rex''':  ''[opening the sack to find his ball]'' Huh. Talk about starting over.
: '''Black Knight''': You could you know. There's still a place for you in the--
: '''Rex''': My room. I thought you said it was trashed.
: '''Black Knight''': Rex, wait.
: '''Rex''': What's the matter, Black? This where you're hiding all your evil secrets?
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex''': Um... Wow!
: '''Black Knight''': This entire wing was destroyed in the blast. I had the space... repurposed.
: '''Rex''': White wouldn't even splurge for private stalls.
: '''Black Knight''': As you see, I treat my finest people to the very finest things.
: '''Rex''': Sure. I'll take one of those, please.
: '''Black Knight''': It's yours-- and anything else you'd like.
: '''Rex''': As long as I do whatever you want-- That it?
: '''Black Knight''': On the contrary-- you're a seasoned agent. I have a few boundaries, but otherwise, handle matters as you see fit.
: '''Rex''': Say I refuse.
: '''Black Knight''': Then I turn you over to mel. ''[chuckling]'' I'm kidding. You're free to leave whenever you like. But I hope you'll stay. Now, more than ever, Providence needs a Rex. So, how do you feel? Like I haven't used one of those in Six months-- Which I haven't. You mind? Bobo?
: '''Bobo''': Rex! Heard you were back. So great to see you, buddy. Whoa. Just a sec, there, pal. Gotta love those certain towelettes.
: ''[Bobo whistling]''
: '''Bobo''': What? Never seen a monkey wash his hands before?
: '''Rex''': Not this one.
: ''[Bobo munching]''
: '''Rex''': You wanna tell me what's gotten into you or what?
: '''Bobo''': What are you talking abou-- Unh! Hey!
: '''Rex''': Sorry. For a minute, I thought you were...
: '''Bobo''': Robo Bobo? Wanna check for a tv in my butt?
: '''Rex''': Pass. But come on. You've, I don't know, mellowed or something.
: '''Bobo''': Guess I just don't have a big need to act out these days, what with you and everyone gone. Plus, the employee benefits are pretty sweet.
: '''Black Knight''': Rex, we've got a little EVO problem. Providence could use your help. Ready to get back in the game?
: '''Rex''': If it involves getting out of here, that would be a &quot;yes.&quot; You coming?
: '''Bobo''': I'll join ya on the next one. I got Tai Chi at 2:00.
: '''Rex''': Missing an EVO smackdown? That doesn't sound like you.
: '''Bobo''': Did I mention the instructor has a thing for back hair?
: '''Rex:''' Ew. Okay. That sounds like you. What is it and where do I find it?
: '''Providence Agent''': We've got an EVO in the subway tunnels, people trapped in one of the trains. The power's out down there, too.
: '''Rex:''' Sounds like a street worm. Sure it's just one? Rex to H.Q. Okay, new chief, how do you want to do this?
: '''Black Knight:''' You're the expert.
: '''Rex:''' I am? Uh, I mean, of course I am. It's just that Six usually--
: '''Black Knight:''' You don't need help, Rex. Handle it as you see fit. Black, out.
: '''Rex:''' What's this strange feeling that's come upon me? Could it be...
: ''[Rex shudders]''
: '''Rex''': Responsibility?! Okay. Assemble your guys over there. Be ready for me. Should the guys grab flashlight. Or... better. Not a bad pre-show. Now for the main event.
: '''Providence Agent:''' How did you know?
: '''Rex:''' These things usually travel in pairs. I used lights from my builds to make it think I was another worm. Have your bug net handy. They're so cute after I shut them down.
: '''Rex:''' Sorry B.K. No can cure.
: '''Black Knight:''' Understood. Our team will take it from here.
: '''Rex:''' Um, take what where?
: '''Providence Agent:''' Move into the vehicle! Move... into... the vehicle! Hit her again!
: '''Rex:''' Um, what just happend?
: '''Black Knight:''' That's all for now, Rex. Nicely done.
: '''Rex:''' Hm. Wait. What are you gonna do with it?
: '''Providence Agent:''' Standard rehab and re-lo. It's all very humane.
: '''Rex:''' I'd love to see that. Mind if I tag along?
: '''Black Knight:''' Sorry, Rex. Authorized personnel only. You've done your job. Now let the team theirs.
: '''Rex:''' But--
: '''Black Knight:''' Boundaries, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' Boundaries. Got it. Rex, out.
: '''Caesar:''' Main container reached. Attach stabilizer ring.
: '''Rex:''' Humane? Yeah, right.
: ''[Bobo yawns]''
: '''Bobo:''' See? Great employee benefits.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah. Right. Hey, you got a tag sticking out in the back. Mind if I--
: '''Bobo:''' Thanks, pal. Well, off to yoga.
: '''Caesar:''' You really shouldn't be here, hermano.
: '''Rex:''' The petting zoo? The worm? My monkey practicing good hygiene? You're using that thing to control my friend!
: '''Caesar:''' He's still the same Bobo you know and love. He just need a few boundaries.
: '''Rex:''' He's not the same, and neither are you! You should hear yourself!
: '''Caesar:''' Making the world safer isn't possible without some form of control. And you'd better get some control of yourself, mijo.
: '''Rex:''' Or what? You'll use that thing on me?
: '''Caesar:''' Open your eyes to all the good we're accomplishing. Isn't this better than smacking them with your giant fists?
: '''Rex:''' That's combat! I protect people and property! Okay, property, not so much, but this? If you can't see the difference, then maybe I never knew you at all!
: '''Caesar:''' It doesn't matter. I have work to do.
: '''Rex:''' So do I!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Uses his Smack Hands to smash everything around him]''
: '''Caesar:''' Rex! Stop!
: '''Black Knight:''' Snooping around, Rex? See, that's another one of my boundaries.
: '''Rex:''' White Knight may have had his issues, but he never resorted to anything like this!
: '''Black Knight:''' I never planned to do this, Rex, but you've become a danger.
: '''Rex''' ''[shocked]'': Caesar! Think! You can't do this!
: '''Caesar:''' Of course I'm thinking. This is the logical conclusion to what we started. 
: '''Rex:''' The logical-- Aaaah! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Raaah! Aah!
: ''[Caesar blasts the mind-control laser, causing Rex to scream and groan in pain]''
: '''Caesar:''' Sorry, Rex. You'll thank me later.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' You... better... believe I will!
: '''Caesar:''' Please don't resist! It's only painful if you struggle!
: '''Black Knight:''' What's taking so long?
: '''Caesar:''' He's fighting it! His nantic energy is spiking off the scale!
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Black Knight:''' Boost power.
: '''Caesar:''' It's not safe to--
: '''Black Knight:''' It's for the best. 
: ''[Caesar increases power, causing Rex's nanites to go haywire as a tear fall down his cheek, heartbroken about his own brother betraying him]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Manages to overpower the mind-control machine, much to the surprise and wonder of Caesar and Black Knight]''
: '''Rex:''' You just drew a line in the sand, bro! ''[runs off]''
: '''Black Knight:''' You'd better have a backup.
: '''Caesar:''' The prototype. Not portable, but more than enough power, even for him.
: '''Black Knight:''' Get it ready.
: '''Rex:''' Unh!
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Rex:''' No mood to get slimed right now, mel!
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Rex:''' What happened to your EVO control?
: '''Black Knight:''' ''[after Black Knight reactivates Mel's control]'' A demonstration. You know what would happen without our influence.
: '''Rex:''' So, you're hijacking its brain, like you tried to do with mine.
: '''Black Knight:''' That won't be necessary if you'll willingly cooperate.
: '''Rex:''' Translation-- if I do everything you say.
: '''Black Knight:''' You've seen how we can work together. Providence still needs you. There will always be a few EVOs we can't control.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah. I'm one of them.
: '''Black Pawns:''' Shall we pursue?
: '''Black Knight:''' Most definitely.
: '''Rex:''' Gangway! Coming through! Huh? No! Huh. Black Pawns. Overdoing the whole theme, don't you think?
: ''[Rex groaning]''
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' Yah! I'm getting beat up by the chess club!
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Black Knight:''' We... got off on the wrong foot. Stow the hardware and come with us. You have my word you won't be harmed. We can start over-- the right way.
: '''Bobo:''' You mind? You're interrupting the enjoyment of my employee benefits.
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: ''[Rex panting]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Black Knight:''' ''[after Rex was tranquilized]'' Excellent work. Take him to the lab.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex:''' What? No way! You're not turning my brain to mashed potatoes! Doc?!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Welcome back, Rex.
: '''Six:''' Good to see you, kid.
: '''Rex:''' Before I blame this on a Burrito-induced nightmare, will someone please tell me-- What... Is... Going... On?!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' What do you think? We've been looking for you.
: '''Six:''' We knew Providence might find you first. Fortunately, we planted a mole.
: '''Bobo:''' Ehh. Rex! Put 'er there!
: '''Rex:''' Uhh! You didn't wash! Oh! You didn't wash! But that means... that he really was... Robo Bobo?
: '''Bobo:''' In the flesh.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Literally. I gave it a biological upgrade, complete with his own nanites and... fleas, ticks, lice, chigger mites.
: '''Bobo:''' What can I say? I'm an ecosystem.
: '''Six:''' It's enough to fool your brother's equipment. The robot is only providing limited intel. But one thing is sure-- new Providence is about more than just getting EVOs off the streets.
: '''Rex:''' I saw it. Whatever they're doing over there is seriously messed up.
: '''Six:''' That's why we've set up our own operation.
: '''Rex:''' ''[Long pause as Rex sees the new HQ]'' Whoa! Where did you get all of this?
: '''Six:''' We have our sources.
: '''Rex:''' So, we're like super-secret spies now? Cool!
:''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex:''' It's too bad about White, though. I never thought I'd say it, but I'm gonna miss that pasty guy.
: '''White Knight:''' ''[White enters]'' How touching, Rex. I, on the other hand, have rather enjoyed the last six Rex-free months. Now... If we're done with the love-in, we have work to do.
: '''Rex:''' It really can't get any better than this. Oh, except one thing-- Can I get a TV?

===Crash and Burn===
*From this episode, Rex can create two builds at once
:''[Bobo yawns]''
:'''Bobo:''' They say nothin' good happens after midnight. And, you know, they're right.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I'm worried about you, Bobo. Since we left Providence, you've been staying out every night.
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:''[Bobo munching]''
:''[Bobo gulps]''
:'''Bobo:''' That's not the least of your worries. Seen our boy lately?
:''[Dr. Holiday scoffs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex is fine. He just needs time to adjust to our new setting. Rex? It's Holiday. Are you there?
:'''Rex:''' Hey, doc. What up?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Just checking in. Everything okay?
:'''Rex:''' Better than okay. I'm about to set a new land-speed record'
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' That wasn't what I meant. How are you feeling?
:'''Rex:''' Appreciate the concern, but the only thing on my mind right now is the need for speed. Apparently, I'm not alone. I'll call you back. Hey! Slow down! I want to talk to you! Ah. You want to play chicken. Doc? Bobo? I'm getting blitzed by some bikers. Aah!
:'''Rand:''' Might as well give up! I won't quit! I'm a relentless, never-say-die, nonstop-- Uh, hey, wait a minute. Who are you?
:'''Rex:''' Think you could have asked me that before trying to run me down?
:'''Rand:''' Ooh! My fault. I thought you were one of us.
:'''Rex:''' &quot;One of us&quot;? What is this?
:'''Rand:''' Sorry, dude. No time to chat. Peace.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, like I'm gonna take that for an answer. A street race? Or a demolition derby?
:''[Lance grunts]''
:''[Lance groans]''
:'''Lance:''' Gonna need a bike.
:'''Rex:''' Can't believe you survive that! You must be the luckiest guy on the-- These are nanites.
:''[Lance groans]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Oh, come on!
:'''Six:''' Something wrong?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Prototypes. I prefer tried-and-tested. And I don't even know what we're going to do with half of this stuff.
:'''Bobo:''' You're goin' soft, gettin' worked over by a bunch of goofballs on motorcycles.
:'''Rex:''' They had weapons.
:'''Bobo:''' Last time I checked, so did you.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, but not while I'm on my bike. I'm strictly one at a time.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The nanites that have infected his body are slowly poisoning him. I've never seen anything like it.
:'''Rex:''' Do what you can, Doc? I'm gonna go out and look for those racers.
:'''Bobo:''' Sounds dangerous.
:'''Rex:''' Sure, Bobo. You can come, too. The nanites we found on the biker gave off a different energy signature. Gonna use one of Holiday's new toys to try to scan for it. A bunch of them. And they're moving fast.
:'''Bobo:''' Then step on it! Maybe Holiday has a point about prototypes!
:'''Rex:''' Or maybe they're not on the streets. I'll watch the road. You watch the screen.
:'''Bobo:''' Gotta warn you-- Chimps make bad navigators!
:'''Rex:''' Just do it!
:'''Bobo:''' Hmm? Left! You're goin' left! Make a right! Another right!
:'''Rex:''' Which way?
:'''Bobo:''' I don't know! That way-ish! Wah! Like I said-- Monkeys make great navigators! This is your biker gang?
:'''Rex:''' They had weapons before I'm telling you-- They're tough!
:'''Bobo:''' If you say so.
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Bobo:''' Wall.
:''[Bobo and Rex grunts]''
:'''Moss:''' That's some fancy ridin'. You following us, kid?
:'''Rex:''' Still think they don't look tough?
:'''Bobo:''' I take it back.
:'''Moss:''' Who are you, kid? 'Cause whoever you are, you're not bad.
:'''Rand:''' You're awesome! Where'd you learn to ride like that? Anybody with that kind of skill should be with us. Yeah!
:'''Moss:''' What's your secret?
:'''Rex:''' No secret. I'm just built that way.
:'''Lunk:''' Is that guy from TV-- The one who fights EVOs.
:'''Bobo:''' Five bucks for pictures, ten bucks for autographs.
:'''Rand:''' A talking monkey! Outrageous! I gotta have one. Is he for sale?
:'''Bobo:''' Brother, you can't afford me.
:'''Rex:''' You guys seem tight-- For guys who try to kill each other.
:'''Rand:''' We're not killers. We're racers. This is a legitimate sport.
:'''Moss:''' It is what it is. Our races aren't for the weak. Name's Moss. You've met Rand.
:'''Rex:''' He tried to blow me up.
:'''Rand:''' I missed. You're welcome. Come on, don't leave me hangin'.
:'''Moss:''' Never met a celebrity who could ride.
:'''Rex:''' I caught you, didn't I?
:'''Moss:''' But are you tough enough try me?
:'''Rex:''' Try me.
:'''Bobo:''' You gotta fight back?
:'''Rex:''' With what?
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, brother. Fine, leave it to Chimpy. Aah! I'll take that. Phbt!
:'''Rex:''' Something else on the map-- Moving fast! And it's big!
:'''Providence Agent:''' Halt! You kids! Pull over! Now!
:'''Moss:''' Cops!
:'''Bobo:''' Worst than cops-- Providence.
:'''Rex:''' The bikes give off a nanite signature. They must have tracked it.
:'''Providence Agent:''' Rex, what are you doing here?
:'''Rex:''' Research. You don't want to get caught up in this! Back off now! Sorry, guys. Have Black Knight sent me the bill.
:'''Rand:''' Ha! No way! You want to beat me, you gotta step your game up. Aah!
:''[Rand groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Rand!
:'''Bobo:''' Don't stop! Kid's wearing armor. He's fine.
:'''Rex:''' No! Something's wrong!
:''[Rand groans]''
:'''Rex:''' What is this thing? Doc? Get over here quick. We've got another one.
:'''Biker gangs:''' WHOO-HOO-HOO!
:''[Biker gangs laughs]''
:'''Biker gangs:''' Yeah!
:'''Moss:''' We thought you'd bailed on us. Where were you?
:'''Rex:''' Watching a doctor try to save Rand's life.
:'''Moss:''' Racers get sick sometimes. It's part of the life.
:'''Rex:''' Those nanite power sources-- you got to stop using them. To feel one with the road, that rush? So some people get sick. When we're on our rides, nothing else matters.
:'''Rex:''' Your rides are killing you! You're gonna be dead-- All of you! And for what? So you can go a little faster?
:'''Moss:''' We need those things to ride. You know what it's like.
:'''Lunk:''' Please. Don't take our bikes away.
:'''Rex:''' Nobody's going to take your bikes. But I need to know where you got those nanites.
:'''Lunk:''' ''[sighs]'' A guy named Valve. He supplies the superchargers.
:'''Moss:''' You're wasting your time. Valve never talks to anybody.
:'''Rex:''' He'll talk to me.
:'''Bobo:''' Been in a lot of bad biker dives, but this is the worst I've ever seen.
:'''Valve:''' Enter, strangers. The biker will see you now. Please, sit. May I offer you some tea?
:'''Rex:''' I'll pass.
:'''Valve:''' Suit yourself. I find a good cup of tea soothing-- for the body and the soul.
:''[Valve slurps]''
:'''Valve:''' You don't have to tell the biker why you're here. The biker can tell. You wish to buy a supercharger.
:''[Valve slurps]''
:'''Rex:''' Your superchargers are killing people. It's gonna stop.
:''[Valve breathes deeply]''
:'''Valve:''' Hmm. That sounds like a challenge.
:'''Rex:''' Maybe it is. I'll race you for them. If I win, you hand over your entire stockpile.
:'''Valve:''' Shh! Your answer is on the wind.
:'''Rex:''' You're... not right in the head, are you?
:'''Valve:''' When the wind commands, the impossible game must be gamed. The challenge is accepted. We will race for the superchargers. And when the biker wins... It won't matter.
:'''Rex:''' Why is that?
:'''Valve:''' Because you'll be dead. Let the race begin.
:'''Moss:''' This is his own private track. He knows it better than anyone. You can still back out-- Probably.
:'''Rex:''' And let people become poison, like Valve? No. I can take him. Just give me something to hit him with. You guys are walking arsenals. You don't have anything?
:'''Moss:''' You didn't think we'd need 'em today.
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, boy.
:'''Six:''' Message from Holiday. The two sick teens have stabilized, but she's still a ways from finding a cure.
:'''Rex:''' It was the only weapon I could find, okay? Can I borrow the sword?
:'''Six:''' Use your own.
:'''Rex:''' On wheels? It's not gonna happen.
:'''Six:''' What's stopping you?
:'''Rex:''' Well, for one thing, I-- Um, not sure exactly.
:'''Six:''' What have I been teaching you? Focus on what you want and make it happen. No more excuses.
:''[Bobo munching]''
:''[Bobo munching]''
:'''Valve:''' You're lucky. One the very best get a chance at this track.
:'''Rex:''' Then I should fit right in. Rules of the game-- ten laps. Cross the finish line before the biker, and you may have them.
:'''Rex:''' So, is the wind talking to you now?
:'''Valve:''' The wind commands the Biker to destroy you. The Biker is happy to oblige.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Bobo:''' You gonna help him?
:'''Six:''' He's doing fine.
:'''Bobo:''' Are you watchin' the same race I am?
:''[Valve grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' You're in trouble, Rex! No. Keep it together. Keep... it... together. Six said it-- Focus. Focus. Focus!
:''[Valve laughs]''
:'''Valve:''' Oblivion.
:'''Six:''' Like I sad-- He's doing fine.
:'''Rex:''' Double-up! Where have you been all my life?
:''[Valve grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Cute toy. But I like mine better.
:'''Valve:''' Aah!
:'''Rex:''' Was there any doubt?
:'''Bobo:''' Yeah, plenty.
:''[Valve panting]''
:'''Rex:''' We had the deal. Remember?
:'''Valve:''' Like the storm that changes directions on a whim, the biker is changing the deal. 'Cause the biker-- ''[grunts]'' Doesn't like! ''[grunts]'' The biker-- ''[grunts]'' never loses! ''[grunts]'' Unh!
:'''Rex:''' First time for everything. Thank you, Six.
:'''Six:''' It was all you, kid.
:'''Moss:''' Rand!
:'''Biker gangs:''' Oh, Rand! Good to see you!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Completely detoxified. In a couple days, they'll be back to full strength. Those could be useful at the new base.
:'''Moss:''' You can't stop us from riding.
:'''Rex:''' What's stopping you? You can still ride. You just won't be poisoned by nanites. Come on. Race you back to the garage.
:''[Rex rides off]''
:'''Moss:''' ''[Chasing after Rex]'' You heard the man. Hit it!
:'''Six:''' You do realize we just turned a group of reckless teenage boys loose on the city.
:'''Bobo:''' All in a day's work.

===Heroes United, Part 1===
: ''[In New York City, a strange white sphere appears in the sky, imposing several sporadic shocks that hit a bridge and a building and several people begin to run desperately. At The Plant, a light turns on and Rex is running and stops, with the light focusing on him, a figure passes behind Rex who smiles and builds his Funchucks and attacks the figure behind him who jumps dodging his attack and landing behind Rex, the light turns on and reveals itself to be Agent Six.]''
: '''Six:''' You need to pay attention.
: ''[Six pulls out his Magna Blades]''
: '''Rex:''' I'll tell you what I need.
: ''[Rex attacks Six who blocks his attacks]''
: '''Six:''' More training? Your swing is getting a little sloppy.
: '''Rex:''' Not what I was thinking, but thanks for the tip.
: ''[Rex tries to attack Six who jumps, dodging the blow. Six tries to attack Rex who builds his Punk busters and jumps back]''
: '''Rex:''' Two words for you, Six- - Theme song!
: '''Six:''' Theme song?
: ''[Jump on top of the cabin where Holiday is]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Break my stuff, and I will ruin you.
: '''Rex:''' Things have been pretty Good for me lately, I have a home, friends, family. The only thing I need now is my own theme song.
: '''Bobo:''' I got your Theme Song. Phbt! Phbt! ''[Bobo makes farting noises.]''
: '''Rex:''' I'm serious. Every hero should have a theme song. I've been working on one. Thought you probably wouldn't hear over the ringing in your ears. It started when the nanites went “Ka-Pow!” upon the scene Transforming all the life on earth like nothing that you’ve seen. But there’s one lucky Hombre who can make them build machines, He's Gen Rex! Ohh!
: '''Six:''' ''[Six kicks Rex backwards]'' Its... Catchy. It's good to see you happy, Rex. Just remember this world, right now, all of those things can be taken away in an instant.
: '''Rex:''' If that's your attempt to inspire me, Six, you need a little more practice yourself.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' How quickly can we get to Manhattan?
: ''[Young Woman gasps]''
: '''Young Woman:''' Providence! It'll be okay now, sweetie.
: '''Black Knight:''' Doctor Salazar, What am I looking at?
: '''Caesar:''' You want the truth? For the first time since I was six years old, I haven't a clue what I'm looking at.
: '''Rex:''' What is going on here?
: '''Bobo:''' Don't know, but I wish I'd brought my tanning butter.
: '''Six:''' Cut the chatter.
: '''Rex:''' I would, but ripping on Black Knight is the only thing keeping me from freaking out. This isn't our usual deal. Just make sure Providence doesn't shoot me in my butt while I'm off saving theirs. Huh? So... I smash that? Ohh!
: '''Bobo:''' Coming back around, kid. I think it likes you.
: '''Rex:''' Holiday, what is it, and where do I hit it?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' I don't know. I-- Wait. I'm picking up Bio-organic energy inside the event.
: ''[A mysterious figure came out of the event, Rex immediately responded and then releases his Smack Hands, but the mysterious figure caught Rex's attack and then counter attacked. Thus, sending Rex flying.]''
: '''Rex:''' Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Have anything to say for yourself before I commence with the face-stomping?
: '''Humungousaur:''' Yeah. You just made a humungous mistake!
: ''[Humungousaur grunts]''
: ''[Humumgousaur grunts]''
: '''Humungousaur:''' Stay down if you know what's good for you.
: '''Rex:''' I'll show you what I'm good at, feo!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, I'm getting more fluctuations in the event. Something's coming out.
: '''Rex:''' I see it, doc.
: ''[A creature flies out of the portal]''
: '''Humungousaur:''' ''[after being hit]'' You and your partners call it quits right now, and I'll keep the powder rising to a minimum!
: '''Rex:''' I was gonna say the same thing, only in Spanish! ''[hits Humungosaur again]'' ''[Humungosaur goes flying]'' ''[talking to Agent Six]''
: '''Rex:''' You take the hunk of junk, Six! &quot;Big ugly&quot; is mine!
: '''Humungousaur:''' Hmm. You wanna learn the hard way? Lesson one-- Dangerous aliens are not welcome on my planet!
: '''Black Pawn:''' Black Knight, target locked and weapons are charged. Firing on your mark.
: '''Black Knight:''' Keep everything we've got focused on that rift. Nothing else comes out of there. Pawns, get those EVOs alive. I need answers. Caesar--
: '''Caesar:''' The physics are amazing. Like a star in collapse, it-- I'll buzz you back.
: '''Black Knight:''' Don't hang up on me, Caesar. Bring Salazar to me-- Now!
: '''White Knight:''' Hands full? My team is here to help. You'd be well advised to let them.
: '''Black Knight:''' You'd be well advised to get off my screens, White Knight. I'll see you tried for treason.
: '''White Knight:''' While you're filing the paperwork, we'll be saving New York. Join us or stay out of our way!
: ''[Rex coughs]''
: '''Rex:''' You can punch. I'll give you that.
: ''[Humungousaur groans]''
: '''Humungousaur:''' You alien wannabes should know better by now-- Mess with Ben, you get the ten.
: '''Rex:''' Aliens?! The ten?! Great-- Another insane EVO. Providence is all over your energy-weapon whatever, so let's see if I can't knock some normal back into you.
: '''Humungousaur:''' Good luck with that. Ugh!
: '''Rex:''' Okay. That's weird.
: ''[Diamondhead grunts]''
: '''Diamondhead:''' What did you just do to me?
: '''Rex:''' Not sure, but I like it.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Holiday, are you seeing this? &quot;Creature feature&quot; just went bling on me.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Be careful, Rex. This is something we've never seen before.
: ''[Diamondhead grunts]''
: '''Diane Farrah:''' Diane Farrah, broadcasting to you live from what appears to be the end of the world.
: '''Alpha:''' So many of us. What has happened here?
: '''Six:''' Holiday, what am I looking at here?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Preliminary scans say non-organic. It appears to be entirely mechanical. I'll need a closer look.
: '''Six:''' I'll see what I can do.
: ''[Diamondhead coughs]''
: '''Diamondhead:''' Lucky punch.
: '''Rex:''' Don't believe in luck. Now hold still so I can cure you.
: '''Diamondhead:''' You're talking crazy, and I'm not sick. We're wasting time.
: '''Lodestar:''' Metal, meet magnetism.
: '''Rex:''' Magnets, huh? Well, there's no metal in pavement.
: '''Lodestar:''' Aah!
: '''Six:''' It's gone, but I found this.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' I'm not exactly sure what we're looking at here. I don't even know if this is made with an element I've ever seen before. Getting some kind of a residual nanite signature, but this is definitely not an EVO. Caesar-- We could use a little help here. What is it?
: '''Caesar:''' The fragment came from the machine.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Can you tell us anything about it?
: '''Caesar:''' Yes, but not right now.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' For the record, most scientists are not like that.
: '''Alpha:''' Him. Father?!
: '''Six:''' We're not finished yet.
: '''Lodestar:''' Ow!
: '''Rex:''' Huh?!
: '''Rex and Lodestar:''' Time-out! Innocents!
: '''Diane Farrah:''' Thank you. You-- Who are you?
: '''Rath:''' Seriously?! I'm the cat who's all that-- The Rath attack! There are about a hundred other things.
: '''Rex:''' Time-in! Thanks for the assist, but say adios to your nanites for real, El Gato.
: '''Rath:''' Will you stop that?
: '''Rex:''' You... you're not an EVO?!
: '''Rath:''' Let me tell you something, robot boy! I have no clue where an EVO is. I'm just trying to do my thing.
: '''Rex:''' Destroy our city?
: '''Rath:''' Destroy?! You really haven't heard off me?
: '''Ben:''' I'm Ben Tennyson. Ben 10? Like, the biggest hero in the world?
: '''Rex:''' Six!
: '''Six:''' Everybody down!
: '''Rex:''' Six! Six, hold on! Holiday, Six is down! Six is down! This is all your fault! Holiday?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' I'm doing everything I can, Rex. We have to focus on the bigger picture. Six would want us to.
: '''Rex:''' Figures the only time I do what Six would want, he's in a coma.
: '''White Knight:''' I'll be having the pleasure of helping Providence figure out how to close the rift. The rest of you can deal with that machine.
: '''Rex:''' It got blown to bits along with Six, remember?
: '''White Knight:''' Don't be so sure. Someone needs to find out what that is and where it went.
: '''Ben:''' I can do that.
: '''Bobo:''' You-- Ain't doing nothing but sitting pretty and shutting up.
: '''Rex:''' And if Six of them pull through, you won't even be able to do that.
: '''Ben:''' I'm sorry about your friend, honestly. Obviously, he's important to you. But I have no clue what's even happening here. I've never heard of Providence or EVOs or-- One minute I'm doing a TV interview. The next, hole in the  ky, flash a light and I'm punching out a mecha monster. Then I end up in a world where nobody knows me.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' He might actually be telling the truth. Ben's nanite absorption level indicates  he came through that rift without any.
: '''Rex:''' I thought White Knight was the only living thing on Earth that's nanite-free.
: '''Ben:''' So you mean I have those things in me now? Great. Where's my space suit?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You'll live. Still doesn't explain how you got here.
: '''Ben:''' We're probably looking at a parallel world thing.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Parallel worlds are a theory, and a shaky one at that.
: '''Ben:''' Are you serious? I go home all the time. Maybe if you knew where that mech alien was from, it might help prove--
: '''Rex:''' Quit talking!
: '''Ben:''' Exactly. Nothing's gonna get answered sitting around here.
: '''Rex:''' In case you hadn't noticed, we're holding you under house arrest.
: '''Ben:''' You aren't holding me. I was staying to see how I could help.
: '''Big Chill:''' You aren't the only person worried about someone close to you.
: '''Rex:''' I got this.
: '''White Knight:''' Rex, don't! I hate kids.
: '''Caesar:''' Nanite Cloud. These are being drawn in from the atmosphere. Now where are you? So it is you. This is most disturbing.
: '''Rex:''' Why don't you just go back where you came from?
: '''Big Chill:''' I'm trying to, you do? Oh no.
: '''Rex:''' What?
: '''Ben:''' Mr. Smoothie isn't here. That's messed up.
: '''Rex:''' My partner is in a coma. If you're stressing over a frozen drink, you are totally getting punk-fusted.
: '''Ben:''' We're in Bellwood, my hometown, where it should be. But it's all different. Part of me hoped it wouldn't be, but this pretty much proves it.
: '''Rex:''' This doesn't prove anything!
: '''Ben:''' You know the friend you care about? Well, I have a cousin, a grandfather, a best friend that I care about! They don't exist here! I may never see them again! I'm totally alone! So go ahead! Do your worst.
: '''Rex:''' Maybe we can... help each other.
: '''Ben:''' You'd do that? What's that sound?
: '''Rex:''' My brother.
: '''Ben:''' Is he like you?
: '''Rex:''' Uh, no. Caesar's a little crazy and he's working for the wrong side, but, otherwise, not so bad.
: '''Ben:''' What constitutes &quot;not so bad&quot; here on opposite world?
: '''Caesar:''' No! We need that!
: '''Rex:''' To blow my head off?
: '''Caesar:''' To stop that!
: '''Rex:''' What is that?
: '''Caesar:''' A bad, bad thing.
: '''Alpha:''' Why would you speak of me so, father? I am your Alpha. I came home. You are pleased?
: '''Caesar:''' No. Not especially.
: ''[Caesar grunts]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Alpha:''' What has happened here? Why so many brothers?
: '''Caesar:''' We had an accident.
: '''Alpha:''' The bodies I built, father-- they still do not last. But my brothers are free. I can control them. They could help make me complete. Aah!
: '''Caesar:''' Rex, stay back!
: '''Alpha:''' I am still weak, father. I need more. Will you help me live?
: '''Caesar:''' I don't believe so, Alpha.
: '''Alpha:''' That... is a very disappointing response.
: '''Diamondhead:''' Then you really won't like this one!
: ''[Diamondhead grunts]''
: '''Caesar:''' Don't let it touch him!
: '''Alpha:''' You control nanites, yet you are human. How is this possible? Tell me the secret.
: '''Rex:''' Uh, Caesar... What is that thing? Why did it call you &quot;father&quot;?
: '''Caesar:''' It's migrating. We have to follow it-- Now! These were gathered from the area of the space-time rift, and you'll find them everywhere Alpha goes.
: '''Ben:''' I take it those are nanites?
: '''Caesar:''' Dead nanites, drained by the entity you just fought and, incidentally, the thing that dragged you here from your Earth.
: '''Rex:''' His Earth? He really is from a parallel world?
: '''Ben:''' Science class much?
: '''Caesar:''' I believe it's been searching for a way home. It was possibly attracted to your weapon before it found its way here. A powerful device, no doubt.
: '''Ben:''' It's called the Ultimatrix. It has the DNA of a million aliens.
: '''Rex:''' Ri-i-i-ght. Aliens. And leprechauns gave me these goggles! I'm curious how big brother knows about something from a parallel dimension.
: '''Caesar:''' Because I sent it there. In the early days of the Nanite Program, our goal was simple- - Construct micromachines to cure diseases, grow new cells, regenerate bones. But there was a control issue. Some thought a human-machine link was the answer. Others proposed that the machines could control themselves. I was in the latter camp. I developed the Alpha to command other nanites. To maximize its effectiveness, I had to program Alpha to think for itself. 
: '''Ben:''' Does a long explanation mean something bad on your Earth, too?
: '''Rex:''' Yep.
: '''Caesar:''' Alpha developed its own consciousness. It evolved into a unique life form and wanted a body, but whatever it built burnt out. So, when Alpha attempted possessing living things, Alpha had to be eliminated. So, I built a dimensional disruptor.
: '''Ben:''' That sounds like a Null Void gun. We've got those on my Earth, too.
: '''Caesar:''' I designed it to send the Alpha to an empty space where it wouldn't do any more damage. That's what I was attempting to do again-- Until you destroyed it.
: '''Ben:''' But the Null Void isn't empty. It's a prison for intergalactic criminals.
: '''Caesar:''' Hmm. I see. Then, clearly, it found a host within a mechanical one. Alpha did always have a way with machines. It's been gaining mass and energy from machines and other nanites. It's able to stabilize a host body, there's no limit to the amount of damage it can cause.
: '''Rex:''' So, just cook up another bazooka thingy, and let's go zap it!
: '''Caesar:''' Too late for that, Rex! Ilo siento, mijo!
: '''Rex:''' Tell me that's a new weapon! Caesar! Eww! Do... you... have any idea what it smells like in there, dude?
: '''Ben:''' I'm sure you can handle a little arborian musk to save your nuts and bolts... Dude.
: '''Rex:''' Sorry. Thanks. I'm just-- Ugh! This day started off perfectly. Now there's aliens, my partner's in a coma, and my brother's trying to kill me.
: '''Ben:''' Maybe he was trying to protect us. Alpha was right there, and now it's not.
: '''Rex:''' You're one of those glass-half-full guys, aren't you?
: '''Ben:''' Here on &quot;Crazy Earth&quot;, why not?
: '''Rex:''' Holiday is Six--?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' He's the same, but the Knights have figured out how to close the Rift. You need to get Mister Ten back to New York if he ever wants to see his home again.
: '''Rex:''' Figures. Just when I almost considered liking you.
: '''Ben:''' Hold on a second. You think I'm leaving you like this? This might not be my Earth, but it's still Earth-- Sort of.
: '''Rex:''' Thanks, but this is my problem, not yours.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, we need you back at base. It's here.

===Heroes United, Part 2===
:'''Alpha:''' Come to me, my siblings.
:''[Dr. Holiday smooches]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I'll be back.
:'''Alpha:''' The nanites in those creatures-- They are different, powerful. Your nanites are weak. I have no use for you. Where is the boy?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' His nanites are off limits!
:''[Dr. Holiday straining]''
:''[Dr. Holiday groans]''
:'''Rex:''' Feel like giving me a hand?
:'''Ben:''' How about four?
:'''Rex:''' I'm starting to like the way you think, Ben 10.
:''[Four Arms grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Alpha:''' You cannot keep me from what I seek.
:'''Rex:''' My brother? Look around! He's not here!
:'''Alpha:''' The father is redundant now that I found you.
:'''Rex:''' Aah!
:'''Alpha:''' I cannot merge! What makes you so special, human? Yes! You shelter an Omega.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex!
:'''Rex:''' Ya-a-a-h! That was my leg!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Your move.
:'''Ben:''' This brother wants to blow you up, and she's your friend? You might be safer on my Earth.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex can lose his builds relatively pain-free.
:'''Ben:''' Are you seriously gonna just wait around?
:'''Rex:''' It wants nanites-- My nanites. Holiday thinks it'll come back for me, but, yeah, I'd rather go after the thing, knock it into another dimension.
:'''Ben:''' But your bio-whatevers need a break. I get it.
:'''Bobo:''' Ya missed.
:'''Ben:''' At least you hit the rim that time.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, thanks.
:'''Ben:''' So, what's happened to you, anyways?
:'''Rex:''' I was gonna ask you the same thing.
:'''Ben:''' It started when the Omnitrix fell out of the sky. I was ten years old.
:'''Rex:''' Six years ago, the Nanite Event changed everything.
:'''Ben:''' And there's alien DNA in the Omnitrix.
:'''Rex:''' And that's how I can build stuff with the micromachines in my body.
:'''Ben:''' Now Kevin, Gwen, and I are the plumbers.
:'''Rex:''' Plumbers? I thought &quot;Providence&quot; was a dumb name.
:''[Rex and Ben laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' Nice assist.
:'''Ben:''' That's how we get it done.
:'''White Knight:''' Satscan just picked up the Alpha. It's at the bug jar.
:'''Rex:''' The bug jar is shielded.
:'''White Knight:''' Not anymore.
:'''Rex:''' So much for waiting. Let's do this!
:''[Ben sniffs]''
:'''Ben:''' Why does my jacket smell like bananas?
:'''Rex:''' Ugh! This feels tight.
:'''Bobo:''' You guys are our best hope? We're doomed.
:'''Ben:''' If this is the bug jar--
:'''Rex:''' Then where are the bugs?
:'''Diamondhead:''' Whoa. What do you call that?
:'''White Knight:''' I call it the entire nanite population of the bug jar.
:'''Alpha:''' The power to change life itself-- What foolishness to give my brothers such a command.
:'''Rex:''' Preaching into the choir, buddy.
:'''White Knight:''' Don't let it get to Rex! If it drains his nanites--
:'''Diamondhead:''' Game over-- Understood.
:'''Rex:''' It already tried to eat me. That didn't work.
:'''White Knight:''' That thing was made to control machines, and until it burns through them, it's got every active nanite in the bug jar at its command. You think you can stop that?
:'''Rex and Diamondhead:''' We can try!
:'''Ben:''' That thing just hacked my watch!
:'''Rex:''' You're going to run out of nanites eventually.
:'''Alpha:''' Incorrect, Thanks to the one thing left on this Earth that can create them-- Your Omega. They thought it could replace me. Now it will make me whole.
:'''Rex:''' Aah! I could use an alien right now!
:''[White Knight screams]''
:'''Ben:''' Great idea, but a certain nanite monster busted my watch!
:'''Rex:''' Do something-- Anything! Do something better!
:'''Ben:''' I could try calling it names!
:'''Rex:''' Let... me... go! Aah!
:''[Rex breathing heavily]''
:'''Rex:''' As long as I fight it, it's like the Alpha and Omega cancel each other out.
:'''Alpha:''' An alternate path is required.
:'''Ben:''' Aah! Stop! He did it again!
:'''Rex:''' No! It's worse!
:'''Alpha:''' Your machine is most interesting. Perhaps within I can find a suitable host.
:''[Alpha Heatblast roars]''
:'''Ben:''' Can he do that?
:'''Rex:''' I think he just did.
:'''Ben and Rex''': Aah!
:'''Ben:''' I think you're really fried at this time. Aah!
:'''Rex:''' Hey! It's me you want.
:'''Alpha Heatblast:''' You presume so much, brother. Organics who rely on machines for their power, I don't need. The machines themselves-- Now, those I will have.
:'''Rex:''' Machines not sold separately, Alfalfa. And stop calling me your brother!
:''[Alpha Four Arms growls]''
:'''Ben:''' Okay. You've got to admit that looks pretty cool. Should I try those insults now?
:''[Alpha Four Arms growls]''
:'''Rex:''' Aah! Ugh!
:''[Shocksquatch roars]''
:'''Shocksquatch''': Wow, this is unexpected.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Well, blast it or something!
:'''Shocksquatch:''' I have no idea what this alien does. I've never seen it before.
:'''Rex:''' You're not filling me with confidence.
:''[Shocksquatch grunts]''
:'''Shocksquatch:''' Ohh, yeah! Ye-e-e-s! Yes! Yes!
:'''Ben:''' No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Oh, man!
:''[Alpha Humungousaur growls]''
:'''Rex:''' Your faceplate's fractured, White. Get out of here before it cracks through.
:'''White Knight:''' Not a chance. Six would have your back. I'm here in his place.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, your biometrics are dangerously low. You need to get away.
:'''Rex:''' Listen to me, Alpha controls nanites. So do I. Why don't I just shut him down?
:'''Ben:''' Hey, Jerk-asaur! You're a loser! Ha! You see that? Hero Time!
:'''Rath:''' Oh, yeah! Let's cause some pain!
:'''White Knight:''' Wait! Not while they're linked!
:'''Rath:''' Oh, you did not just stop me!
:'''Alpha:''' The power you hold is impressive.
:'''Rex:''' You mean the power to kick your butt?
:'''Alpha:''' The power to create machines. You are not worthy of such a gift. The Omega nanite is mine.
:'''Rath:''' Aaah! Take this and this! What do you think of what?!
:''[Alpha-Omega roars]''
:'''Alpha:''' I misguided to place my trust in a father that did not want me. I never needed him. I simply needed the energy and means to do what I have always done-- Evolve.
:'''Ben:''' You okay?
:'''Rex:''' No. Definitely not okay. It took my Omega nanite, and I think I know what I wants.
:'''Alpha:''' Behold, organics... The beginning and the end of all things. I am Alpha-Omega. This is the twilight of humanity. Alpha-Omega destroys all.
:''[Alpha-Omega roars]''
:'''Rex:''' Holiday, are you seeing this?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Unfortunately, yes. We're not looking at random destruction. Alpha is synthesizing the matter around him to build his own nanite.
:'''Rex:''' Thanks to my Omega nanite!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' This isn't your fault, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' Sure feels like it. I woke up this morning on top of the world. Now I'm about to witness the end of it. Six was right.
:'''Ben:''' I don't think this is how it was meant to play out. I've seen what you can do.
:'''Rex:''' My most powerful builds came from the Omega nanite. A lot of people are going to get hurt, and I can't stop it. What happens when the best you can do just... isn't enough?
:'''Ben:''' You get an Upgrade.
:'''Rex:''' Weren't you listening? Alpha has the Omega.
:'''Ben:''' I'm not talking about a nanite.
:''[Transforms into Upgrade]''
:'''Rex:'''  Hey! What are you-- ''[Upgrade merges with Rex]'' Whoa! Okay. That feels weird. ''[Upgrade covers Rex's body like a suit]'' Whoa! What supposed to happen now? ''[Upgrade's head appears on Rex's left shoulder]'' Aah! Ohh! Don't do that! You're freaking me out!
:'''Upgrade:''' Build something!
:'''Rex:''' ''[Builds a Smack Arm, which is modified by Upgrade]'' Sa-weet! So, what's the plan?
:'''Upgrade:''' You build stuff, I make it better, fight, fight, fight, we win!
:'''Rex:''' Works for me! ''[Rex builds a Boogie Pack and blasts off]'' WHOO-HOO!
:''[Alpha-Omega roars]''
:'''Rex:''' Ye-e-e-ah!
:'''Upgrade:''' Nice shot, Rex! Run, run, run, run, run, run, run!
:''[Alpha-Omega screams]''
:''[Alpha-Omega roars]''
:'''Rex and Ben:''' Aah! Oof!
:''[Rex and Ben groaning]''
:'''Rex:''' We need a direct hit on the Alpha.
:'''Ben:''' More insults? I've got a good one.
:'''Rex:''' I've got an idea, but you have to trust me. When I fire, you've got to make your roly-poly thing.
:'''Ben:''' You're not thinking of--
:'''Rex:''' Yup.
:'''Ben:''' Isn't that dangerous?
:'''Rex:''' Probably.
:'''Ben:''' On three?
:'''Rex:''' I've officially decided I like you, monster guy.
:'''Ben:''' Same here, robot kid. One--
:'''Rex:''' Two-- Three!
:''[Alpha-Omega roars]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' WOO-HOO! Yeah! Oh, yeah! He shoots! He scores! WHOO! And the crowd goes wild!
:''[Rex imitates crowd cheering]''
:'''Rex:''' Whoa, there, little nanite brothers. Where do you think you're going? Alpha's not the only one who can tell you what to do.
:'''Ben:''' Isn't your Omega Nanite going to be in there, too?
:'''Caesar:''' I'll handle that. Where are you, little guy? Got it! Look! It worked!
:'''Ben:''' And that, my friend, is how you save the world.
:'''Caesar:''' Very clever, little brother. The density of this sphere is over thirty grams per centimeter cubed. It would be extremely difficult for Alpha to slip through the molecules of this, assuming it survived compaction. We need to get rid of it.
:'''Rex:''' Caesar, wait!
:'''Caesar:''' Rex, I wasn't fully able to repair the Void gun. I'm not sure how long my repairs will hold before it discharges. We only get one shot at this, and we have to do it fast. It's now or never, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' How are you going to carry it? That thing must weigh ten tons!
:'''Ben:''' I'm not going to carry it.
:'''Upchuck:''' Let's do this again someday.
:''[Upchuck munching]''
:''[Upchuck gulping]''
:'''Rex:''' Wow! That's just-- Wow! Six?
:'''Bobo:''' He's gone.
:'''Rex:''' ''[Weakly]'' Gone?
:'''Bobo:''' To the little ninja's room.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' He's going to be fine, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' He is?! All right! Yes! Oh, man, I knew it! I knew the whole time!
:''[Rex laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' I mean... cool. I'm glad you're alive!
:'''Six:''' Me too.
:'''Rex:''' I was so scared, Six. I've never done anything so hard in all my life. I really thought the world was going to end, And then I totally kicked butt!
:'''Six:''' I hear you had a little help.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, when his monster watch wasn't conked out. Ben was a cool kid. I wonder if I'll ever see him again.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' With infinite dimensions, the math doesn't work in your favor, Rex.
:'''Bobo:''' Math-- The enemy of all things good.
:'''Six:''' Although-- The cosmos works in mysterious ways. I think certain people are meant to meet, to fight side by side, to be friends. You may see one another sooner than you think.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Caesar?! How did you...?
:'''Caesar:''' Okay. Before White Knight comes looking for me here, one last piece of unfinished business.
:'''Rex:''' You're sure this is the Omega, right? I mean, you didn't grab the Alpha by mistake?
:'''Caesar:''' 100% certain. Well, actually 99.998%. Nothing is 100%.

===Phantom of the Soap Opera===
:'''Rex Salazar:''' In a world he never chose and barely understands... ''[Rex looks over the countryside from a cliff, jumps and lands in a snow scene]'' One incredibly good looking guy fights for us all. His name...you know it baby...Rex. ''[jumps into a lake scene]'' Forget train wrecks... ''[punches]'' And car wrecks... ''[kicks]'' Nothing brings the pain like this Rex. ''[runs into city scene. EVO walks down street, Rex runs up, jumps, grabs EVO's head and tears it off. Holds it over his head in victory gesture.]''
:'''Actor in costume:''' Yeah, yeah, that's hilarious kid.
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Ah, anytime you want to stop trying to get me fired get back to the tour.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Sorry. Got caught up in the moment.
:'''Actor in costume:''' Ah, dude?
:''[Rex puts head back on the man in EVO costume.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' And on your left, the sound stage where they make the hit TV show Middle School Talent show.
:''[Teen girls on tour squeal and run towards it.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' That's a closed set. ''[Noah pulls on his hair]'' C'mon, this is my first week as a page, I could lose my job!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' I got this. ''[pulls girls back from stage with turbines]'' I just don't get girls, how come they get so... ''[notices something behind Noah, acts all excited]'' Huh hu oh huh... oh El Amor de la Pasion del Amor! Why didn't you tell me EADLPDA was made here?
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Um, probably because I didn't really believe you actually still watch a soap opera.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' It's a telenovela. The actresses are smoking hot. And I don't have cable?...ah c'mon dude don't be a hater. ''[crosses arms]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Whatever. We're not going in there, they get like ten safety violations a week, no one's allowed in accept crew and studio staff.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' You mean like pages? ''[Brushes Noah's shoulder with his hand, smiling. Noah brushes his hand away.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' No way. My boss is a total butt-buster for the rules and she is always watching. ''[makes binocular with his hands]''
:'''Head Page:''' You got that right bub. ''[Rex looks behind him, and jumps away]'' By the way Page, you lose something? ''[has three girls from Noah's tour group tied up in a rope]'' Found these wandering over by Middle School Talent Show. ''[Noah runs over and unties them, rope falls]''
:'''Head Page:''' ''[points to her left eye]'' I got my one good eye on you, Nixon.
:''[On set of telenovela]''
:''[Isabella crying]''
:'''Reymundo:''' Pensabas que yo era tu marido. ¡Pero fue una mentira! Pero la verdad es que soy Reymundo, el hermano diabólico de Reynaldo.
:'''Isabella:''' Yo sé, pero todavía te amo.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' ''[standing by salad bar in cafeteria looking up at TV screen]'' How can anyone say that's not great!
:''[Man in cowboy hat tips his hat to Noah]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Whoa? Celebrities know you?
:''[There are drinks on their trays at this point, then in the next frame there are no drinks on their trays and they go over to get drinks.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' The only one here who knows my name is my boss. I'm just a newb on an internship.
:''[Blond girl puts her hand on Noah's shoulder and reaches across him to get a soda, walks away, looks back and gives him a finger gun.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Yeah right, you just got a finger gun from TV weather lady Summer Sonnenshine.
:'''Noah Nixon:''' It's the page jacket not me, if you put this thing on everyone would think you work here. Still. I gotta admit it's pretty cool.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Y'know, I didn't even know you'd applied for this. But I guess when you jump ahead in time you gotta expect some surprises...OH MY GOSH... ''[drops tray]'' It's Isabella, from El Amor del Pasion del Amor.
:''[Rex throws up his arms, knocks tray into Noah's chest spilling it all over his jacket]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' AHHH!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' I know she's even hotter in real life than she is on the...
:'''Noah Nixon:''' ''[looks down at tray and jacket]'' Ohhhhh...
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Okay, okay don't worry...
:'''Head Page:''' ''[yelling at another page behind Rex]'' You call yourself a page!
:'''Rex:''' Okay worry. ''[puts his fingers together]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' This is a huge violation of the dress code, oh I am so fired!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' No you're not. Come on, move!
:''[They run to a supply closet.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' I've gotta lead another tour in forty-five minutes. We can't get to a dry cleaners and back in forty-five minutes.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' This is my bad, but I can fix this. ''[Noah panicking, rocking and hyperventilating]'' We just have to calm down and think. Just calm down. ''[Rex points at Noah]'' Noah, calm down!
:''[Rex grabs a bottle of pickles off the shelf, opens the lid and throw contents of jar at Noah's head. A pickle ends up in Noah's mouth, he spits it out.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Not helping. ''[Noah, calm now and not hyperventilating and rocking, wipes pickle juice out of his eyes.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Okay, listen we passed the wardrobe department on the tour, they've gotta have a washer and dryer right?
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Uh... yeah, I guess?
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Alright, good, give me your outfit and stay put, I'll take care of everything else.
:''[Scene change. Sign which says laundry stages commissary.]''
:''[Rex runs towards laundry, passes stage of telenovela. Grins and stops. Looks into open door. Looks down at soiled jacket. Up at stage doorway. Walks away. Runs back and grins bigger. Walks into stage with Noah's jacket on.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Uh--
:'''Isabella:''' Finally! You are here!
:''[Isabella kisses Rex all over his face.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' This is happening, right? I'm not going to wake up and be making out with my pillow again am I?
:'''Isabella:''' Come with me, they want to cancel us you know. That's why the studio puts us here in this place falling apart with all the accidentes.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Soap operas do not get the respect they deserve.
:'''Isabella:''' You are very wise for your age. We don't even go backstage anymore. Too dangerous.
:''[A silhouette of a rat is seen, it squeaks]''
:'''Beatriz:''' Is that our page?
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Uh...
:''[Rex falls]''
:'''Isabella:''' He's mine, I saw him first!
:''[Rex gets up and Isabella grabs him.]''
:'''Isabella:''' He is mine!!!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Hum?
:'''Beatriz:''' Why don't we let him decide?
:'''[Rex is being pulled back and forth]''
:'''Isabella:''' You would like that wouldn't you?
:'''Beatriz:''' Yes I would! Very much.
:'''Isabella:''' Fine.
:''[Girls growl at each other and walk away.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' ''[grinning]'' Did they just cat-fight over me?
:''[The girls come back with lists.]''
:'''Isabella:''' Here is a list of what I need you to do!
:'''Beatriz:''' And here's mine!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' You want me to work on the show?
:'''Beatriz:''' Claro que si, we haven't had a page on set in ages.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' But I'm not ... ''[looks over the girls]'' ...able to think of one reason why I would pass this up.
:''[Screen cuts to Noah looking out the door. He sees the chief page and closes the door quickly, after that, the scene changes back to Rex carrying boxes of water with yogurt on top.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' I got your yogurt, but I couldn't find the water you wanted. So I got these.
:'''Isabella:''' You are dead to me! But I will take this one. ''[takes yogurt]''
:''[Rex stares in shock and drops the boxes full of water.]''
:''[Old man walks in a dressing room, and Reynaldo comes out soon later.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Whoa, it's Reynaldo! Uh, coffee? ''[offers him a mug of coffee]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' Gracias.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Leche?
:'''Reynaldo:''' How dare you! I am lactose intolerant.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Uh, okay, didn't know that. Sugar?
:''[Reynaldo knocks the sugar out of his hand.]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' Real men take their coffee strong and hot. Are you suggesting that I am not a real man?
:''[Rex looks around and the phone rings.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Rex, where are you?
:'''Reynaldo:''' No phone! ''[Reynaldo knocks the phone out of his hand.]'' You will talk to me face to face. Mano a mano! ''[grabs Rex's jacket]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Hey wait what are you... ''[Reynaldo pulls Rex away from table. Stage light falls where Rex was standing]'' ...Oh, thanks!
:''[Everyone runs up to them.]''
:'''Beatriz:''' Not another accidente!
:'''Isabella:''' ''[scared]'' Ay. Dios mio! No!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' It's okay, I'm fine.
:'''Isabella:''' ''[pushes Rex down]'' My jogurt!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' I'd hate to be the guy that has to clean that up... ''[whispers to man though they look at him]'' Oh. ''[Reynaldo hands him the mop.]''
:'''Beatriz:''' If I didn't know better, I'd say that someone was trying to kill us.
:'''Reynaldo:''' Someone is. The head of the studio is trying to kill our soap opera. That's why he put us in this accursed stage, with all these accidentes. But we... ''[another stage light falls and hits his head, he falls to the ground]'' Aahh... Por que? Ay.
:''[Rex looks up and sees a mongoose...runs after it...goes backstage. Sees clowns and a sign saying “Mongo”.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Ugh! Clowns.
:''[The mongoose squeaks.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Lemme guess. You're the one who's been causing all the accidents.
:''[Mongo growls, bears teeth]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Okay, let's say we can wrap this up quietly. Last thing I need is someone wondering why the guy in the page jacket can do this. ''[wraps Mongo up in the whip thing, Mongo gets tiny, escapes, growls]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Guess that explains how you've been able to hide out back here. ''[Mongo pulls lever cannon comes out of floor and fires at Rex. Platform falls Rex dodges. Mongo squeaks]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Can we please do this a little more quietly and with a lot less YOU trying to kill me?
:''[Mongo jumps into the “O” of his name on the sign.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Wait, that's you, isn't it? You just want your job back. I can help you. ''[reaches in and tries to cure him Mongo runs out and traps Rex's hand]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Enough with the booby traps, I'm trying to help you. ''[Mongo sets off another trap]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Uh-oh. [makes big fist, weight on rope swings and hits Rex, makes noise]
:'''Beatriz:''' What's going on back there?
:'''Isabella:''' Where is that page? I am beginning to wonder ...HOW LONG IS IT GOING TO TAKE FOR HIM TO CLEAN UP MY JOGURT!!!!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' ''[Getting thrown around back stage]'' Ouch. ''[gets beat up by mechanical clowns]''
:''[Mongo cuts stars from ceiling they fall and cut Rex's jacket]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Ok, New plan-- First I smash your face, then I cure you.
:''[Mongo knocks over equipment]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' No. ''[grabs equipment, Mongo jumps on his arm, punches him and he falls]'' Oww! Look out!
:''[Actors run from set, Rex falls and smashes set]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Uhh, okay here's the deal—all the accidents you've been having they were caused by an EVO backstage. It used to be a mongoose and now it wants it's old job back. ''[last wall of stage set falls behind him]''
:'''Beatriz:''' What are jou talking about?
:'''Isabella:''' We just saw you ruin our set.
:'''Reynaldo:''' You are trying to destroy this soap opera just like the rest of them! It is true what they say, this sound stage must be cursed for us to have such a horrible page such as you, Senior... ''[looks at name badge]'' Noah Nixon.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Whoa, wait. This isn't Noah's fault.
:''[Three actors gasps]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' ''[tears off his own shirt]'' Now you insult us by talking about yourself in the third person! Somehow we must rebuild and finish our shoot! But as soon as we do, Noah Nixon, I will have you fired!
:''[Workers fixing set, Rex's phone rings.]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Rex! Finally. How's the jacket?
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Umm. Well, the good news is you won't notice the stain anymore. Hey uh, by the way, your page training, did it include anything about the creepy backstage in studio B?
:'''Noah Nixon:''' What? Why are you--
:'''Rex Salazar:''' No reason. I was just thinking, hypothetically, what would happen if I used your jacket to take a quick peek at the telenovela and ended up chasing some killer EVO mongoose? Hypothetically... Uh...Noah?
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Sorry, just trying to figure out how to tell my parents I have no future.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Hey I got this. I hit a little snag. Just keep your pants on.
:'''Noah Nixon:''' ''[sitting the maintenance closet in his underwear]'' Heh!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Sorry, look, you don't have anything to worry about all I have to do is catch the EVO before they finish shooting and clear my... your name.
:'''Noah Nixon:''' You know what? I'm not worried. I am completely resigned to the fact that I am losing my job. ''[Noah hangs up on Rex. Rex hears dial tone.]''
:'''Beatriz:''' ''[to Reynaldo]'' You are bleeding!
:'''Reynaldo:''' What I am is an actor! We must shoot this scene. We cannot let them cancel us! ''[moans and falls on his face crushing a chair]''
:'''Beatriz:''' You cannot go on.
:'''Isabella:''' If only there were someone else here who knows our show, is fluent in Spanish, and will do a scene in which he kisses me.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' I'll do it!!!
:'''Reynaldo:''' You? The one who ruined our set and lied about the EVO? I'd rather die! But then, my life will surely end if the show is canceled, so maybe... But no! It's impossible. But yet, what is more impossible than a dream. Nothing means more than my dream of saving this telenovela!
:'''Rex Salazar:''' So, is that a--
:'''Reynaldo:''' Si. You will be our savior. And then I will have you fired. Accion!
:''[Rex is dressed as Reynaldo. Takes Isabella in his arms and looks deep into her eyes, smiles..then turns away, sees Mongo and gasps. Isabella pulls his face back to her and puckers for a kiss. Mongo squeaks and runs out the door and Rex turns his eyes towards it.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' ''[thinking]'' Okay no kiss, but you're gonna save Noah's job! ''[groans]'' Nope. Doesn't make it any better. ''[Runs out Isabelle runs after him, trips on his wig and falls to the ground gasping, reaching after him]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' ''[makes Rex Ride to chase Mongo down alley. Runs into a set. Falls]'' Where'd you go?
:'''Guy in suit:''' You! Page! Take this script to post, pronto.
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Hey wait, I'm not--
:'''Guy in suit:''' Oh? You're not going to do it? Are you talking back to me Mr.... Nixon?
:'''Rex Salazar:''' No. Mr. Nixon is not definitely not talking back to whoever you are. ''[takes script, leaves]''
:'''Guy in suit:''' Nixon! ''[Points in the other direction of where Rex was going. Rex goes where he's pointing]''
:''[Rex walks by alley hears Mongo munching garbage, sneaks up, tries to cure it. It escapes, Rex corners it in dead end alley]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Oh you're not so tough when you can't hide, are you? ''[Mongo growls and grows huge]'' Oh so you can do that too. ''[Mongo roars, swipes at Rex with claws]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Hey, watch the jacket. I'm in enough trouble already. ''[Sets down scripts. Big fists. Mongo shrinks to escape. Rex falls to the ground. Mongo gets huge again behind him, tries to stomp on Rex, Rex rolls out of the way, Mongo shrinks and runs away, Rex climbs out of hole in ground breathing heavily and falls to ground.]''
:'''Guy in suit:''' ''[walks up]'' Are you kidding me? You still haven't delivered that script? ''[Rex runs off]''
:'''Guy in suit:''' Nixon! ''[points in other direction, Rex runs that way]''
:''[Mongo jumps off roof grows huge lands on Rex, grabs script.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Hey, gimme that! ''[grabs Mongo with big fist throws him into a stage building]''
:''[Rex looks in the hole into the stage.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Sorry. ''[runs off after Mongo]''
:''[Mongo throws him higher than the roof tops, Rex lands on big feet, Mongo tackles him. Rex lands in front of the post building, grabs remains of script out of Mongo's mouth. Mongo runs away, Rex gathers script remains and hands it to man at post door.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' I think this is for you. ''[runs after Mongo]''
:''[Phone rings]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Did you catch it?
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Not yet, but I delivered a script for you, well, most of it.
:'''Noah Nixon:''' I am so dead.
:'''Lady with clipboard:''' ''[grabs Rex by the collar]'' Noah Nixon, you're right on time for your two p.m. tour. ''[Gives Rex clipboard and keys]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' ''[Driving tram with tourists]'' Uh, there's a building where some TV shows are made and there's another one and oh great there's the giant killer EVO.
:''[Mongo chasing tram, Rex steps on gas. Tram goes sloooow. Mongo attacks tram. Rex lands, catches tourists with big hands, flies off on hoverboard]''
:'''Tourist:''' They had better special effects at my kids' school play.
:''[Back on soap opera stage]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' I need a bigger reaction from you. Bigger!
:''[Rex crashes through ceiling with Mongo hanging on the bottom of his hoverboard, heading towards Isabella.]''
:''[Isabella screams and covers head, Mongo crashes into set]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' Yes! That's it exactly!
:''[Mongo growls]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' Be careful or you're gonna get the hand. ''[big fists with right hand. Mongo jumps at him, Rex grins and raises his left hand and cures Mongo. Mongo lays on ground cute and unconscious.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' That's not the hand I meant.
:''[Actors, stunned, applaud]''
:''[Rex picks up Mongo.]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' You are a good page, Noah Nixon.
:''[Mongo wakes up runs around on Rex and perches on his shoulder cutely.]''
:''[At supply closet with Noah, Rex walks in holding torn up jacket]''
:'''Noah Nixon:''' Oh, my jacket! ''[Cuddles jacket, then holds it up and glares at Rex through the hole in it. Rex grins guiltily.]''
:''[Head Page walks in, Noah hides jacket, then realizes he is in underwear and tries to hide himself behind jacket.]''
:'''Head Page:''' I got a dozen calls from all over the lot about you, Nixon. I don't know what you were thinking. ''[He sits down, sweat runs down his face, he closes his eyes, frowns, runs head away. Head page grabs him and hugs him.]''
:'''Head Page:''' I'm proud of you, kiddo! It took me sixty seven years to make chief page. I bet you'll get the job in half that time. ''[Noah stands up holding jacket in front of him. Rex and Noah look puzzled Head Page walks to door, turns back]''
:'''Head Page:''' Oh and them soap opera fellas, eh, they got a special reward for you. ''[they look at each other with puzzled frowns]''
:''[Telenovela stage, Noah dressed as Reynaldo. Isabella kisses him.]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' And cut! You look differante than you did before, Noah Nixon. ''[Noah looks up at his blond eyebrows and takes off the wig and mustache. Smiles at Reynaldo. Reynaldo looks at him thoughtfully.]''
:'''Reynaldo:''' I can see you've been to makeup. Good you finally look like a real man! ''[Noah smiles.]''
:'''Rex Salazar:''' [peeking in from backstage, makes a jealous face as Noah is laughing together with the actors.] It's okay, it's okay. You're a good friend, you're a good friend.
:'''Guy in suit:''' You! Quit talking to yourself and get me some coffee! ''[Rex runs off]'' Nixon!
:''[Mongo looking down from rafters]''

===Riddle of the Sphinx===
:'''Egyptian Guide:''' They uncovered the tunnel during routine sewer work. No one has set foot in here in over 3.500 years.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Providence doesn't work the location yet?
:'''Egyptian Guide:''' ''[laughs]'' The antiquities comission does not like this Black Knight. They keep her busy with much paperwork.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The maze looks like it extends for miles. They do that to keep looters out?
:'''Egyptian Guide:''' Or to keep something in.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Anything that was trapped in here couldn't be alive after all this time.
:'''Egyptian Guide:''' I-I-I must go.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''': Watch out! Bobby traps.
:'''Egyptian Guide:''' That's not what I'm afraid of.
:'''Bobo:''' It's only been a few days since we heard from Holiday.
:'''Six:''' Something's wrong.
:'''Bobo:''' Maybe she wanted a vacation from you clowns. &quot;Something's wrong.&quot;
:''[Bobo grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Providence! She in is trouble.
:'''Six:''' Black Knight. And she has your better half.
:'''Bobo:''' I'm predictin' an awkward situation.
:'''Black Knight:''' Hello, Rex. If you came for your friend, I'll have to disappoint you.
:'''Rex:''' That hairy creep? You can keep the traitor. Hey! My faithful guide, why don't you go away while we discuss business?
:'''Bobo:''' It's me, you dopey tin can! Beat it! Or the boss lady's gonna get wise to our little switcheroo.
:'''Rex:''' What's the campout for?
:'''Black Knight:''' Routine scientific research.
:'''Rex:''' Look, I know Holiday was here. What'd you do with her?
:'''Black Knight:''' We arrived an hour ago. The locals say Holiday unleashed a monster down in the tunnels. The situation's under control. As soon as we've secured the tunnels, I'll send a team in to see if she's still alive.
:'''Rex:''' I'm going with you.
:'''Black Knight:''' You're going nowhere. You quit Providence. Unless you're recosindering?
:'''Rex:''' Come on, guide. Holiday's in those tunnels. But Black Knight has a whole battalion of Providence goons guarding the entrance.
:'''Six:''' I figured she'd be no help. That's why I found someone who knows a back way in.
:'''Egyptian Cooker:''' The Kushari is healthy. For the stomach, good.
:'''Rex:''' Enough about the Kushari! Where's the back entrance?
:'''Egyptian Cooker:''' For so young, you in such a hurry. And old cook like me, I live by selling Kushari. Why not buy some? You buy, I give you more information.
:'''Bobo:''' Ah, come on. Stop bein' so stingy. Buy some more.
:'''Six:''' Where's the back entrance?
:'''Egyptian Cooker:''' The sewer man-- They came to fix a leak. They found the tunnel to the entrance in my basement.
:'''Bobo:''' Mmm!
:'''Rex:''' Way cool! Maybe we'll see some mummies!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Tell us where Holiday is!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Where do you think I am?
:'''Six:''' Holiday!
:'''Bobo:''' So, what's with the halloween get up, doc?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I found it in one of the chambers. Scares off the curious. I need to get to the bottom of all this before Black Knight.
:'''Rex:''' The bottom of what? This is all ancient history?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' You can this ancient history?
:'''Rex:''' That looks like a nanite!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' That's because it is a nanite.
:'''Six:''' How could they have knowledge back then?
:'''Rex:''' Aliens! Like the ones that built the pyramids.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' None of this is more advanced that the 21st century. It's not aliens. I think the answers lie behind this door. But I can't figure out how to open it.
:'''Rex:''' Open the door? No problem, Doc!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Stop! This whole place is booby-trapped. We open this wrong, they'll bring the tunnels down on us.
:'''Rex:''' If there's a wrong way to open it, then that means there's a right way, too. Maybe the nanite picture is a clue. The whole thing is rigged like one. Told you-- No prob. Whoa, mumies.
:'''Bobo:''' What are you lookin' at, beautiful?
:'''Rex:''' Ha! Awesome! I'd love to see the look on Knight's face when she finds out we've beat her here.
:'''Black Knight:''' Then let me step a little closer so you can see.
:'''Six:''' How'd you find us?
:'''Black Knight:''' Your mole helped me.
:'''Bobo:''' Sorry, pal.
:'''Black Knight:''' I should have known better. It's old junk from the dead.
:''[Black Knight gasps]''
:'''Guranset:''' Gharun Set is not dead.
:'''Rex:''' Put her down!
:'''Black Knight:''' This isn't the time for violence. Our host has forgotten his manners. I presume he hasn't had guests in a long time.
:'''Guranset:''' Almost an eternity. Gharun Set said has waited for his release. Awaken this cursed prison through the ages.
:'''Black Knight:''' You speak English. That is interesting. Who taught your own language, Gharun Set?
:'''Guranset:''' I was taught by the great father.
:'''Black Knight:''' Father? What did he look me?
:'''Guranset:''' He is dead-- As all of you soon shall be!
:'''Black Knight:''' Now's the time for violence.
:'''Guranset:''' Aah!
:'''Black Knight:''' A nanite disrupter. Something I had your brother's lab whip up. It's quite lethal.
:'''Rex:''' Looks like the lab forgot to tell him that.
:'''Guranset:''' The boy controls the engines of life? It can't be. I laid low the armies of six kingdoms, swordsman. You think your tiny blades can stop me?
:'''Rex:''' Try this one for size!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex!
:'''Rex:''' Huh?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' His staff is a nanite disrupter. Get it away from him.
:'''Rex:''' Easier said than done!
:'''Guranset:''' Haah!
:'''Rex:''' Oh, mummies!
:'''Bobo:''' Yeah, yeah, you got your mummies. I hope you're happy!
:'''Six:''' Rex! We can handle this! He's getting away!
:'''Guranset:''' One last trap to keep me imprisoned, father. Nothing will keep me from my destiny! You serve his plan, child, and don't even know it.
:'''Rex:''' Everybody talk weird in ancient Egypt, or it is just your special thing? Uh... are they supposed to do that?
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Guranset:''' Finally! I am free!
:'''Six:''' These EVO's won't say dead.
:'''Bobo:''' Their breath stinks, too! Ah, boy!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' You could thank me for saving your life.
:'''Black Knight:''' Dr. Holiday, our lives are not safe yet.
:'''Guranset:''' I am not alone. Together, we shall reconquer this land, and then.. the world!
:'''Rex:''' Uh, I think the sun's baked him loopy. You can't reanimate that. It's a statue.
:'''Guranset:''' This is not statue, child. It is a tomb. Arise, my mighty steed. Arise, my sphinx!
:'''Rex:''' Providence, this is Rex. You may want to evacuate Cairo.
:'''Guranset:''' This city is a blight upon my kingdom. All shall be as it once was.
:'''Rex:''' I'm warning you, Gharun Set-- I don't want to have to get rough with you. Step off the pussycat.
:'''Guranset:''' You presume to tell a pharaoph what to do. Be gone!
:'''Six:''' Holiday. There's something I want to tell you before it's too late.
:'''Bobo:''' Ugh. Hold still! Oh, no.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' All of them. Like the nanites keeping them alive... self-destructed? I'm sorry. What were you going to say?
:'''Six:''' Holiday... I, uh...
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Hold that thought.
:'''Bobo:''' What's it gonna be, the kooky chicks or we go help Rex save the world?
:'''Six:''' Rex probably has this under control. Holiday needs my-- our help.
:'''Bobo:''' Yeah, I can't resist a good catfight either.
:'''Rex:''' Let me handle! This it's too dangerous!
:'''Pilot:''' Black Knight, target sighted. It's riding a 50-foot-tall house cat. Please advise.
:'''Black Knight:''' Do not harm. Contain and capture. We need that specimen.
:''[Black Knight gasps]''
:'''Black Knight:''' Pilot disregard. Last order. Target no longer needed. Destroy. Repeat-- Destroy.
:'''Pilot:''' You're with the lady. Lock and load.
:'''Rex:''' Huh? Whoa! Get out of here! I don't know what he's up to, but it's not good.
:'''Garunset:''' Behold the majesty of my dream. My kingdom! My paradise!
:'''Rex:''' Whoa!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' What is this place?
:'''Black Knight:''' It's the stuff of legends. The fabled hall of records which lay hidden beneath where the sphinx once was.
:'''Bobo:''' &quot;Was&quot;?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' This can't be! That's the helix splitter. And that looks like a nano-flux inducer. Caesar built the first prototype of one last year.
:'''Black Knight:''' I can't let you touch any of this. It's too unstable with age. When you blundered in the tomb, you set off a safeguard. Someone thought this room too dangerous for the world to know about.
:'''Bobo:''' Agreed. Let's scram!
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' We can't! Don't you know what this means to science? The knowledge in here is invaluable. It cannot be lost-- Again!
:'''Black Knight:''' It won't be! Now that we know where it is, we can dig it out later. We will study it. I promise you that.
:'''Six''': Holiday. Let it go.
:'''Guranset''': As father promised-- I will rule forever.
:'''Rex''': Forever is gonna be shorter than you think.
:'''Guranset''': No! Nooooo!
:'''Rex''': Aw, come on! I didn't hit you that hard!
:''[Guranset gasps]''
:'''Rex''': What's happening to you?
:''[Guranset gasps]''
:'''Guranset''': Aaaaaaaaah!
:''[Guranset grunts]''
:'''Guranset''': Do not touch your pharaoh.
:'''Rex''': You need help. Your nanites are dying of old age-- I think. It's like starting an old car. Uh, o-or a camel. Let me help you. I can fix your nanites, and then maybe--
:'''Guranset''': Lies!
:'''Rex''': You're in a strange time, a strange place. We have science, machines. We can help you. Trust us.
:'''Guranset''': Like you trust the woman you call Black Knight? I see now this is a world of lies. You and I have no place in it. Father told me of you... Rex.
:'''Rex:''' What? How do you know my--
:'''Guranset''': I would have helped the world. Ended the hunger, the wars. But now he will return. Avenge me. ''[Echoing]'' I see now this is a world of lies. You and I have no place in it.
&lt;hr width80/&gt;
:'''Black Knight:''' You wanted something?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' The hall of records-- You can't keep it a secret. It must be studied. That hall--
:'''Black Knight:''' What hall?
:'''Rex:''' Why'd you do that?! Holiday said--
:'''Black Knight:''' Some secrets are best left buried under the sands, Rex.
:''[Dr. Holiday grunts]''
:'''Black Knight:''' Gentleman. Dr. Holiday.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Six, what'd you want to tell me back in the tomb?
:'''Six:''' It can wait.
:'''Rex:''' Don't wait too long.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' All those priceless artifacts. And we still don't know who created Gharun Set.

===Guy vs. Guy===
:''[Rex moans]''
:''[Rex shouts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' Huh?
:''[Noah laughs]''
:'''Noah:''' WHOO! Oh, yeah!
:'''Rex:''' Noah?
:'''Noah:''' Gotcha!
:'''Rex:''' This means war.
:'''Noah:''' Hey, tanner! What's up, Chris? Noelle, how's it going? You'll have to do better than that, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' I'm gonna get you, Noah. That's a promise.
:'''Noah:''' Aren't you forgetting something?
:'''Rex:''' Aah!
:'''Noah:''' Gotcha! Rex, I'm prank master supreme. Save yourself some pain and admit defeat.
:'''Rex:''' Never! I will get you!
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Oh, no. Aah!
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' You're not the only one with Smack Hands. Gotcha!&quot; Ugh!
:''[Rex growls]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex:''' How'd he even get in here?
:''[Bobo belches]''
:'''Rex:''' How could you let him in here? You're conspiring with the enemy!
:'''Bobo:''' Mm. Meh, Bribed me. And I needed a laugh. If you really want to get back at the kid, you'll need my help.
:'''Rex:''' How could I trust you after you betrayed me to Noah like this? Forget it.
:'''Bobo:''' Your loss. I've been banned from six asian countries for some of the pranks I've pulled. It's a delicate art, requiring skills, daring, and a cold, unforgiving heart. You need my help.
:'''Rex:''' I gotta do this on my own.
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' Look, Bobo. Noah's better than me at just about everything.
:'''Bobo:''' When was the last time he turned himself into a motorcycle?
:'''Rex:''' He's smarter than me. He's more popular than me. You know that I've never made a basket when I've played hoops against him?
:'''Bobo:''' So? I've never been able to run without my knuckles draggin'. What's the big deal?
:'''Rex:''' I just want to beat him at something! It wouldn't be as bad if he wasn't so smug about everything.
:'''Bobo:''' And now he's started a prank war that you can't win.
:'''Rex:''' Um-- ''[Chuckles]'' Actually--
:''[Rex laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' Gotcha! Oh! ''[Grunts]''
:'''Noah:''' Very funny, but you have no idea what you started.
:'''Bobo:''' Heh heh. Don't you watch movies? All those little blond kids are evil. You don't stand a chance.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! ''[Grunts]''
:''[Bobo groans]''
:'''Rex:''' I don't know what Providence was thinking. This EVO is a threat.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' We're picking up reports like this all over the country. They think they can just tame them and set them free.
:'''Rex:''' Hah! Huh?
:'''Bobo:''' Heh. Maybe Noah could do a better job fighting EVOs, too, huh?
:''[Noah laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' AAAAH! That, ladies and gentlemen, is what I do best! Whoa!
:'''Noah:''' Gotcha! Hope you like maple. Now, that's how you throw a water balloon. We're even.
:''[Bobo laughs]''
:'''Bobo:''' That's good.
:'''Rex:''' We're so not even. We're so not even! Ouch!
:'''Bobo:''' That'll never work.
:'''Rex:''' It's totally going to work. You don't even know. Huh?!
:'''Bobo:''' Why are you so jumpy? Noah called a truce.
:'''Rex:''' Well, I didn't accept it, and I'm not jumpy.
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Get down! Look! You're going down, Noah.
:'''Bobo:''' It's not gonna work. Ow.
:'''Rex:''' Almost perfect. This is actually going to work! It's not going to work. Okay. How do I make him pay?
:'''Bobo:''' Oh, sure. Now you come to me. I'm not even sure if you can handle my kind of prank. Where I go, it's not for the faint of heart.
:'''Rex:''' No, that's perfect! I'm practically begging you!
:'''Bobo:''' Give me one good reason. WAAAH!
:''[Bobo sputters]''
:''[Noah laughs]''
:''[Bobo groans]''
:'''Bobo:''' Okay. I'm in. Pranking is an art form, but it is also a sport. Like any sport, lots of people play, but only a few truly master it. I have created the greatest pranks in the history of the world-- The carpet bomb, the feline freak-out, the White House outhouse! And this will top them all!
:'''Rex:''' Finally, Noah's going to feel what it's like to be on the losing side!
:'''Bobo:''' Relax, would ya? You get too excited, you'll blow for the both of us!
:'''Rex:''' We gotta do something fast, or he's gonna keep getting me.
:'''Bobo:''' Let him. Take one for the team if you have to. This is all about the big finish. And it's gonna be big. We must observe. Watch his every move. Then we pick the right kind to strike. Get going. Start spying on him. Find out every detail you can. It's P-Day.
:'''Rex:''' Yeah. Prank day!
:'''Bobo:''' No, I gotta go to little chimp's room.
:'''Rex:''' Ugh! Oh, hey, Noah! I gotta warn you, I'm feeling unstoppable today.
:'''Noah:''' Yeah, about that. Uh, sorry, but I can't shoot around today.
:'''Rex:''' Is this a prank? I'm not gonna fall for it.
:'''Noah:''' What? No. I just have a date with Claire tonight. Sort of came up last minute. I'm sorry.
:'''Rex:''' Really? I mean, uh, bummer. Have a good time on your date, I guess.
:'''Noah:''' Oh, no. No, not tonight, Rex. Claire is off-limits. Temporary truce.
:'''Rex:''' Fine. But-- That doesn't mean I'm letting you off easy. You can call it off for tonight, Bobo. Noah's got a date with Claire.
:'''Bobo:''' Call it off? This is a perfect time to strike! Well done, my apprentice.
:'''Rex:''' I made a promise.
:'''Bobo:''' You're the one who wanted to dance with the devil, kid. Now put on your boogie shoes and prepare to be amazed. I did a little digging while you were gone and found this-- The most humiliating picture of Noah ever taken.
:'''Rex:''' Um, I'm not sure this picture is embarrassing.
:'''Bobo:''' Are you doubting the king?
:'''Rex:''' Uh-huh.
:'''Bobo:''' There's a list of bush league pranks you're gonna pull on Noah before his date.
:'''Rex:''' These make even my gags look good. Literally!
:'''Bobo:''' That's the plan. We need to lull Noah into a false sense of security. We'll win this war. It's just gonna take a little more pain and humiliation on your part.
:''[Noah whistles]''
:'''Noah:''' Rex, come out. I know you're in there.
:'''Rex:''' I know what you're gonna say, Noah. Here, have some gum as a peace offering.
:'''Noah:''' Like I'd fall for that. Seriously, Rex. I need you to give it a rest, at least for tonight. I want my date to be perfect.
:'''Rex:''' I understand. Tonight will be perfect.
:''[Bobo grunting]''
:'''Bobo:''' Come on.
:'''Rex:''' Bobo?
:'''Bobo:''' You are beautiful.
:'''Rex:''' Uh, where'd you get all the stuff to build it?
:'''Bobo:''' Hey, trade secret. You don't want to know anyway. It's the sausage-making part of pranking.
:'''Rex:''' Bobo--
:'''Bobo:''' Okay, fine. I took some stuff from the lab. No big deal. Now, help me move this. It's time to put the plan into action.
:'''Rex:''' Bobo, what is the plan?
:'''Bobo:''' Noah and Claire will arrive at the restaurant only to find it closed for health-code violation.
:'''Rex:''' But what about his plan &quot;B&quot;? Noah always has a backup plan.
:'''Bobo:''' Got it covered. The roads around town are all suddenly under construction.
:'''Rex:''' So, they'll have to walk. Big deal.
:'''Bobo:''' It is a big deal.
:'''Rex:''' They'll be walking right through a gauntlet of giant electronic billboards. And it actually worked!
:'''Bobo:''' Of course it worked. I'm the king. Help me with these cables.
:'''Rex:''' Not until you tell me what the rest of the plan is.
:'''Bobo:''' See those screens?
:'''Rex:''' Kinda hard not to.
:'''Bobo:''' Imagine this-- Up there, in front of her.
:'''Rex:''' This isn't going to work. This isn't the kind of thing that bothers Noah, like, at all.
:'''Bobo:''' Just trust me. All we have to do now is sit back and wait. The machine is powering up, but when it's ready-- Oh-- Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!
:''[Bobo laughs evilly]''
:'''Rex:''' Hey, doc.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, have you seen Bobo? I saw him sneaking around the lab earlier, and now I can't find some equipment.
:'''Rex:''' What-- Kind of equipment?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Among other things, the magnetic containment pod. It's holding some pretty rare radioactive material. If even a small amount is exposed to oxygen, it could ionize the local atmosphere.
:'''Rex:''' And-- That's bad?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It is if you're planning on living anywhere near it for the next five hundred years.
:'''Rex:''' Well, if I see it, I'll make sure you get it back. Bobo! What's that cylinder? Is it the magnetic containment pod?
:'''Bobo:''' Maybe.
:'''Rex:''' Shut down the machine, Bobo. Now!
:'''Bobo:''' All right, all right, relax.
:'''Rex:''' It didn't work! Once it loses power, the material will contact oxygen, and then--
:'''Bobo:''' Catastrophe? Oh, boy.
:'''Rex:''' It's not working. My nanites can't communicate with it. The radiation must be blocking them. We've-- Destroyed the world. Great prank.
:'''Bobo:''' Would you relax? We'll figure something out.
:'''Rex:''' Really? What? Duck and cover? This is bad. I'm calling Holiday.
:'''Bobo:''' Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up there. We call Holiday, both of us are in deep chimp chips.
:'''Rex:''' Well, at least let's get these people out of here.
:'''Bobo:''' Wouldn't make a difference. All we need to do is disconnect the billboard. That'll stop the power drain. Trust me.
:'''Rex:''' Well, that could work, if I'm fast enough. I won't call Holiday yet, but we do need some help.
:'''Noah:''' He thinks I've never noticed, but it's still pretty funny. I mean, he never makes a basket!
:''[Noah gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Hey, Noah. Hi, Claire.
:'''Noah:''' Dude! Not cool! We had a deal.
:'''Rex:''' It's not a prank, Noah. Well, at least not anymore. See, we were going to prank you, but our machines sort of malfunctioned, and if we don't stop it, it's going to destroy the city.
:'''Noah:''' And now you need my help. What kind of prank would lead to this?
:'''Rex:''' Well, we wanted to put an embarrassing picture of you up on all these billboards. Now, we need to go around and disconnect all of them.
:'''Noah:''' Wait. What picture?
:''[Noah laughs]''
:'''Noah:'' You realize Claire took this, right?
:'''Rex:''' I'm going to kill that monkey. I really am. But let's save the world first. All I wanted was to be better than Noah at something, and you had to make it so big it was bound to fail.
:'''Bobo:''' You were the one who begged me for help.
:'''Rex:''' &quot;Practically&quot; begged. And now, I need Noah's help with this! Thanks for making him better than something else, Bobo! Whoa!
:'''Bobo:''' One down, about fifty to go.
:'''Rex:''' 50?!
:'''Bobo:''' Go big and go home, baby.
:''[Bobo grunting]''
:'''Rex:''' All I'm saying is that if you hadn't insisted on proving that you were the king of pranks, none of this would have happened!
:'''Bobo:''' Wouldn't have mattered if you weren't useless at pranking!
:'''Rex:''' That's it. I'm calling Holiday! Holiday, we're in trouble. Bobo stole that containment cylinder as part of a prank, and now we can't shut it down. What can we do?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Hug your monkey and say goodbye. You're too late.
:'''Rex:''' We're too late.
:'''Bobo:''' Rex? Run.
:'''Rex:''' Whoa! Aaah! Huh? It didn't-- It's not going to--
:''[Noah laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' What just happened?
:'''Noah:''' I did what you should have done from the start. I called Holiday, and she told me how to rewire your device so the battery wouldn't fail. Then we figured out how to broadcast the billboard's images all over the world.
:'''Bobo:''' Wah!
:'''Rex:''' Hug my monkey?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Never take anything from my lab again. Nice video, by the way. Gotcha.
:'''Bobo:''' Noah, you are indeed the king of pranks. You have proven your supreme dominance above all others. I pale in comparison. I bow before your awesome might.
:'''Noah:''' Claire, wait! We can still go to dinner!
:''[Rex and Bobo laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' So, I'm not the greatest prankster in the world.
:'''Bobo:''' That's puttin' it mildly.
:'''Rex:''' But, so what? Someday I'll be better than Noah at something.
:'''Bobo:''' Maybe.
:''[Rex laughs]''
:'''Rex:''' Oh, the old exploding-orange gag! I can't believe you fell for it! I got you! Who's the king of pranks now? Gotcha! Gotcha! Gotcha!
:'''Bobo:''' It's on.
:'''Rex:''' Now, Bobo, come on. It was just a joke. Gotta go.

===Double Vision===
: ''[The episode starts as a butterfly flies through plants in a flower shop. Suddenly, Rex is thrown into the shop window, making nearby civilians run away. Rex gets up and looks out of the broken glass, seeing a beastly plant EVO, a few people watching, and Agent Six slashing his swords around to evade the EVO's tentacles.]''
: '''Rex:''' ''[Pants and brushes leaves off his sleeve and puts on goggles.]'' Not bad!
: ''[Uses the Punk Busters to jump out of the shop and generates his Smack Hands to uppercut the EVO, causing it to crash into a nearby building.]'' But I'm better!
: ''[The EVO gets out of the glass windows and roars, attacking Agent Six.]''
: '''Agent Six:'''	''[Cuts off a tentacle and walks towards Rex.]'' Talk is cheap, Rex. Prove it.
: '''Rex:''' ''[Generating the Smack Hands.]'' No problemo.
: ''[The EVO rushes towards Rex, unfortunately, Rex grabs it and slams it onto the ground. A random girl is driving up the road on a moped. However, she is stopped as the EVO blocks the path.]''
: '''Rex:''' ''[Putting his hands up to assure the girl.]'' Nothing to worry about, I've got this handled. ''[Turns to EVO, whom is still on the floor.]'' Okay big guy, say adiós to those nasty nanites.
: '''Rex:''' ''[Rex kneels down to cure the EVO, flowers spout out of the EVO]'' Aw, for me? Does this mean we're dating?
: ''[Suddenly, the flowers shoot out some goo into Rex's face, making him slam onto the floor, a crowd forms around the battle.]''
: '''Rex:''' ''[Yelps while getting up and pulls his goggles off and wipes the goo off his face.]'' Oh, that's better. ''[He gives his goggles to the random female on the moped]'' Hey! Watch these for me. ''[Runs back into battle and generates the Punk Busters and kicks the blacked out EVO over a building.]'' Goal! Hey thanks for holding onto my...huh?...
: ''[Rex turns around to see the girl missing from the crowd. Deforming his Punk Busters, he spots the girl riding away on her moped. She turns to look back at Rex, appearing to have on his goggles.]''
: '''Rex:''' Goggles!
: ''[Rex puts one of his hands up to signal for her to wait, but the EVO returns and wraps its tentacle around Rex's neck. The EVO twists Rex in mid-air in the sky for a minute before slamming him onto the cement. Rex gets up and sees the goggle girl riding away out of sight.]''
: '''Rex:''' Hey! You've got my...ungh...goggles... Aah! Ungh! Did you see that girl?! She stole my goggles!
: '''Agent Six:''' Priorities, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' They are my priority, Six. I can pound EVOs any day. Those goggles are-- Ah, great. Who invited her?
: '''Black Knight:''' Stand down, gentlemen. We've got this covered.
: '''Rex:''' We don't need any help. Whoa! Whoa! Ungh!
: '''Black Knight:''' Obviously. Control collar-- Now. We'll take it from here.
: '''Rex:''' Take it from whe-e-re?! I've already got this under contro-o-o-o-l! Whoa! Ugh! Let me try to cure it.
: '''Black Knight:''' The new Providence protocol is to confine, constrain and control. If curing is an option, it will be considered-- At my discretion.
: '''Rex:''' Control? I can cure it now and end this.
: '''Black Knight:''' The offer still stands. If you want to come back to Providence, you can continue your mission.
: '''Rex:''' I have my mission!
: '''Black Knight:''' Curing every EVO on Earth isn't a mission, Rex. It's an impossibility.
: '''Rex:''' Watch me.
: '''Black Knight:''' Everybody back! Contain those seedlings!
: '''Rex:''' You just made it worse! Now I've got to clean up your mess. Starting with this guy. See? Fearing works!
: '''Black Knight:''' It was your actions that exacerbated this situation. I want full containment and control over those seedlings. Move out-- Now.
: '''Agent Six:''' While you were arguing, Holiday found another sprout. Let's go deal with that before Providence does.
: '''Rex:''' But-- My goggles!
: '''Agent Six:''' Focus, Rex. We've got work to do.
: '''Rex:''' Nice work!
: '''Agent Six:''' Drop in the bucket. Look below.
: '''Rex:''' Wow. And I thought I'd be able to knock off early today.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' On the contrary, Rex. By overlaying current worldwide wind patterns on top of international population centers, we're looking at total global infestation within thirty-eight hours.
: '''Bobo:''' Ooh, that's a lot of roughage.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' I need to get in the field and obtain some live samples. Bobo and I will meet you at the rendezvous point in the mobile command center.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, doc. We're almost there. Hey! It's that girl! Wh-o-o-o-oa!
: '''Agent Six:''' What's gotten into you, Rex?
: '''Rex:''' My goggles-- I can't see without them!
: '''Agent Six:''' Obviously, you can see without them.
: '''Rex:''' Well, yeah, but I really need them a lot of the time. Don't you remember when I first got them?
: '''Agent Six:''' Actually, no.
: '''Rex:''' Oh. Sorry. My bad. It was early on, when I was just learning to control my powers. Whoa!
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' Aaaah! Aah! Aaaaah! Oof!
: '''Agent Six:''' Horse manure.
: '''Rex:''' This is exactly why I need my goggles! Hey! I thought this thing was just a sprout!
: '''Agent Six:''' It's the nature of plants to grow.
: '''Rex:''' Hm. Very Zen of you, Six. Well, it's the nature of me to kick EVO butt! Whoa! Oof! Yuck! This stuff really stinks!
: '''Agent Six:''' All yours.
: '''Rex:''' Ta-da! And for my next trick... Oh, and look who's late to the party.
: '''Black Knight:''' ''[Entering]'' Alpha team, I want you to lay down suppressive fire and--
: ''[Realizing the EVOs not there]''
: '''Black Knight:''' Belay that. Sit Ops, I was told we had a Class-Three EVO situation here. Where is the EVO?
: '''Rex:''' ''[Rex hands her flowers]'' Sorry. This is all that's left. Six, are we good here? I've got to run.
: '''Agent Six:''' I'd put those in water.
: '''Black Knight:''' Unh!
: '''Rex:''' Slow down! I just want to-- Ungh!
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Huh? What?! No way! Hey! You've got my-- Ugh! Whoa! ...Goggles.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You've got bigger problems than a girl on a scooter, Rex. First a flower shop, then gardening supplies. It's getting hungrier. Gentlemen, I suggest you get to the sewage-treatment plant as quickly as possible.
: '''Rex:''' Huh? Why?
: '''Agent Six:''' Fertilizer, Rex, as in if those sprouts chow down on that much raw nourishment, we're in some deep...
: ''[Plant EVO bursts through a nearby wall]''
: '''Rex:''' ...Horse maneure. Hungry? Eat this!
: '''Agent Six:''' Holiday, get to the sewage plant. We'll meet you there after we clean up.
: '''Bobo Haha:''' Clean up? I'd rather make a mess! Shoulda brought my chainsaw.
: '''Agent Six:''' Shoot the seedlings!
: '''Rex:''' Huh? Okay, this time I'm going to--
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Hey! Wait! Aw, man! Back off!
: ''[Rex panting]''
: '''Bobo:''' You went a little nuts there, buddy. I like it! But... Goggles?
: '''Rex:''' That EVO interrupted before I could finish the story.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Agent Six:''' Here, kid. Try these on.
: '''Rex:''' Um, so I can look like a total doofus?
: '''Agent Six:''' You have no idea how unique these goggles are, Rex. A reclusive weaponsmith in Zurich crafted this single pair before he turned EVO.
: '''Rex:''' Really? And then what happened to him?
: '''Agent Six:''' I did. He won't be crafting any more goggles.
: '''Rex:''' Cool!
: '''Agent Six:''' These are one-of-a-kind, Rex-- Special, for you.
: '''Bobo:''' What a bunch of chimp chips! Those goggles are-- Whoa!
: '''Rex:''' Wow. That is a lot of rampaging EVO.
: '''Bobo:''' Yeah. Lucky holiday-- She's right in the thick of it.
: '''Rex:''' Lucky?
: '''Bobo:''' She gets to try out all the special modifications I made to that sweet ride.
: ''[Dr. Holiday grunts]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' ''[Plant EVO has Holiday trapped inside the Mobile Command Center]'' Okay. Let's see how you like 10,000 volts of--
: ''[Holiday presses a button, and music starts playing]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Bobo's mix tape?! Who puts the stereo next to the weapons system?! One more time-- Big red button. Always go for the big red button. Unless you don't want to drain the batteries to zero.
: ''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Bobo, your improvements could use some improvements. Rex, if you're not too busy, I'd appreciate a little assistance.
: '''Bobo:''' Hey, ain't that your girlfriend?
: '''Agent Six:''' She can take care of herself, right, Rex?
: '''Rex:''' Right-- For now.
: ''[Dr. Holiday gasps]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' That's more like it. Ungh! Fine! Let's see how you like this! I don't know what you just did, Rex, but thanks. Rex?
: '''Black Knight:''' I admit our last encounter didn't end well, but I think we need to work together on this one.
: '''Rex:''' You want to work together? We left Providence, remember?
: '''Black Knight:''' Rex--
: '''Rex:''' What happened to &quot;stay out of my way&quot;?
: '''Black Knight:''' Rex!
: '''Rex:''' So now when you need somebody to take out your trash, you can just forget that I quit your crummy organization?
: '''Black Knight:''' Yes, Rex, I can, because I don't let my emotions guide my choices. I only want what's best for Providence-- And the world.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, cool. Just wanted to hear you say it. Aah!
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, the EVO is too big to cure without getting to its core.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah, well, I'm not doing much good out here!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' All those vines, the seedlings, everything-- They're just puppets to the plant. Stop those nanites in the core, and you cut the strings.
: '''Rex:''' On it! Huh?!
: '''Agent Six:''' Watch it, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' Whoa! All I want are my goggles. All I've wanted all day are my goggles, and this EVOs been blocking me over and over! Hey, Bobo, you know how to shoot one of these?
: '''Bobo:''' Eh, how hard could it be?
: '''Rex:''' Load me into this thing and point it right at that EVO's sweet spot. And hurry. I got better stuff to do.
: '''Bobo:''' You do know that's 30,000 gallons of raw sewage you're aimin' at?
: '''Rex:''' Don't remind me. Oh... Yuck! Yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck!
: '''Agent Six:''' Elegant solution, Rex.
: '''Bobo:''' You don't smell elegant. You stink worse than me. I'm a little jealous.
: '''Black Knight:''' All right, Rex. Get to work.
: '''Rex:''' Work? What do you mean? I just served that vegetable!
: '''Black Knight:''' You cut the strings, but you still have to fix the puppets.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' She's right, Rex.
: '''Black Knight:''' You want to cure the world? Start curing.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Whoa, man, I'm beat! I don't think I can move another inch if you paid me.
: ''[Goggle girl rides past him]''
: '''Rex:''' Gotta move! See ya! Hey! Stop for a second! Six, I'm really starting to think this girl's got some kind of EVO action going on-- Teleporter, speedster, something.
: '''Goggle girl:''' Hey!
: '''Rex:''' Huh? Six, she's not just a teleporter. She can make doubles of herself-- Multiple abilities! She's an EVO, like me!
: '''Goggle girl:''' It's the skeevy guy who's been chasing me. He was chasing me, too. And me. What do you want?
: '''Rex:''' You took my goggles! I want them back!
: '''Goggle girl:''' Hey, Einstein, did you see our logo? That stands for &quot;Goggle Girl&quot;, as in the delivery service. You haven't ever heard of us?
: '''Rex:''' Um... No.
: '''Goggle girl:''' &quot;Nothing is cuter than a girl on a scooter.&quot; Kind of hard to miss.
: ''[Goggle girl groans]''
: '''Goggle girl:''' It's the worst slogan ever.
: '''Rex:''' But-- But my goggles!
: '''Goggle girl:''' Part of our costume. The boss buys them in bulk, along with these cheesy wigs he makes us wear. It's kind of lame.
: '''Rex:''' In bulk?! Those goggles?! But... They're one-of-a-kind! They're special! They're-- They're... I'll just go now. Nope. Nope. Definitely not.
: '''Agent Six:''' I still don't know why those goggles were so important to you.
: '''Rex:''' You gave to me, Six. It was the first present, the first nice thing that I remember getting since you found me. You said they were special, and that made me feel special.
: '''Six:''' Yes, about those goggles... Apparently, according to Bobo, I may have misled you. There was dozens of them in the Providence service bay.
: '''Rex:''' I knew the story was fake, but you told it because you cared about me. That's what made them special.
: '''Agent Six:''' I see.
: '''Bobo:''' Hey, champ. You got a package.
: '''Goggle girl:''' Sign, please.
: '''Agent Six:''' It's for you. From us. Just open it.
: '''Rex:''' My goggles!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Better. We commissioned an enhanced version.
: '''Rex:''' Cool! Infrared... Microscopic... Nanovision?! Thanks, you guys. You really are one-of-a-kind.
: '''Bobo:''' Those are great, but these are me.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' I just need to hold on to them for a few more hours while I run a full diagnostic.
: '''Rex:''' A few hours?! I just got them! Aw!
: '''Bobo:''' Here-- Because I care.
: '''Goggle girl:''' They actually look kinda cute.
: '''Rex:''' Hey, doc! No rush!
: '''Bobo:''' Ain't love grand?

===Black and White===
: '''Calan:''' Be advised, we've got activity. Major activity. Stop right there, or we'll shoot. Don't make me do it.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, I know what you're thinking, but this is totally not what it looks like.
: '''Calan:''' Calan to command, tell Black Knight-- We have apprehended the intruders. Repeat, we got'em.
: '''Rex:''' No! Get out of my head! Stop it! Stop! Stop with the talking! A dream. Oh, thank you! For a second, I swore that I heard his voice. It was almost like he was in the-- Room. Huh?!
: '''White Knight:''' I was wondering if I was gonna have to send the monkey in with a bucket of water. But I thought, &quot;why should he have all the fun?&quot; Five minutes-- Situation room. Consider this your wake-up call.
: '''Rex:''' Aren't you supposed to be playing dead? You're lucky Black Knight doesn't know you're here.
: '''White Knight:''' Black Knight thinks what I want her to think. With the installation of the new regime, I suspected that there was more going on at providence than just this new control protocol. I decided to test my hypothesis. I needed time to operate freely without prying eyes. So I went off the grid.
: '''Rex:''' And from the smell of it, you haven't changed out of your suit since then.
: ''[Bobo sniffs]''
: '''White Knight:''' I've been busy. I've been tracking their operations. They involve familiar locales and even more familiar machinery.
: '''Rex:''' You still use a camera with film? Do they even make that stuff anymore?
: '''White Knight:''' What they don't make are machines like these. This is the wreckage of Rylander's lab.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Are they doing what I think they're doing?
: '''Rex:''' Do what?
: '''White Knight:''' It appears that this new Providence is restarting the nanite program.
: '''Rex:''' There is no way my brother would help restart something that nearly destroyed the world. There's got to be a good explanation. We should just ask him.
: '''White Knight:''' We can't risk direct contact. We need to infiltrate Providence, download her computer banks, and assess how far along they are before we take any other actions.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Over there.
: '''Rex:''' Just saying there's more here than meets the eye. Whoa!
: '''Six:''' Breaking into Providence? That's a big move, even for you. Black Knight is sure to have enhanced the security systems. We may be able to breach the perimeter defenses, but once inside, we'd be blind targets.
: '''White Knight:''' You'd be right if we were playing on her board.
: '''Six:''' Forgive me for doubting you.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, is someone gonna tell me what these are for? This is so not going to work.
: '''Six:''' Trust the plan.
: '''Rex:''' Huh?
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex:''' Okay, so, maybe they worked. But how'd you get them to do it on cue?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' All a matter of timing. Assuming we get past the outer perimeter, securing the data is a completely different story. Providence encrypts all data. We need to disable multiple units before we can download anything off the mainframe. Doing that undetected is ''[Sighs]'' insane.
: '''Rex:''' Finally, a voice of reason. I'm calling my brother. Took the lady with three PhDs to realize what I've been saying all along is right. Hey, that costs money! I'm over my minutes!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' How did you--This is--
: '''Six:''' Doable.
: '''Rex:''' Do what? What is that? A secret passage.
: '''White Knight:''' When they built the tower, I had them install these-- Upper-management corridors.
: '''Six:''' In the old days, they called passages like these the King's Road.
: '''White Knight:''' From here, we face some unknowns. Stick to the plan. Or we could die.
: '''Rex:''' What?! Me?! What about you?! Part of the plan was to do this quietly.
: '''Calan:''' Stop right there, or we'll shoot.
: ''[Dr. Holiday gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' Here we go. Okay, I know what you're thinking, but this is totally not what it looks like.
: '''White Knight:''' Stand down, Rex.
: ''[Calan laughs]''
: '''Calan:''' Welcome back, sir. We've been waiting for you.
: '''Rex:''' Que, huh?
: '''Calan:''' Sorry for the scare, Rex. We couldn't guarantee the Black Knight wasn't tapping our communications. It was best to keep radio silence. In any case, say hello to your man on the inside.
:'''Providence Agent:''' He's got a bomb! All units, fall back, fall back!
:'''Black Pawn:''' Captain Calan, do you copy? Report.
: '''White Knight:''' Ready for a repeate performance?
: '''Calan:''' Ready when you are, sir. Good luck, everyone. They're headed for the-- Petting Zoo.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Here it is, just like he said.
: '''White Knight:''' This is the Hive, the central nervous system of the entire complex. An electric field protects the inner chambers. We'll need the circumvent it.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' I've got an idea, but you'll have to go in partially naked. We've got eyes everywhere.
: '''Six:''' Good. Knight and I will handle the encryption towers. You know what to do with this.
: '''Rex:''' No sweat. I'm on it. Just have to make one quick detour. Bro? You in here? Oh, no. No, no, no!
: '''Caesar:''' Rex, is that you? What brings you here?
: ''[Six groans]''
: '''Six:''' Partially naked. Tower one clear. Proceed to next phase.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Got it. Redirecting the data flow now.
: '''Six:''' Anyone hear from the monkey?
: '''Worker:''' Huh?!
: ''[Workers screams]''
: '''Bobo:''' Offical business-- Keep your distance.
: ''[Bobo inhales deeply]''
: '''Rex:''' Is that Dr. Rylander?
: '''Caesar:''' It is. Well, almost. After you brought back Van Kleiss, I couldn't help but to wonder if perhaps I might do the same for him. Unfortunately, Van Kleiss was already greatly in tune with the nanites. As you can see, Dr. Rylander-- Wasn't.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, whatever. Listen, I'm here on a secret mission.
: '''Caesar:''' Secret? 
: '''Rex:''' White Knight said--
: '''Caesar:''' White Knight is alive?
: '''Rex:''' If you can call him that. Anyway, he says-- You might wanna sit down for this part-- That Black Knight is restarting the Nanite Program. Don't you think that's messed up?
: '''Caesar:''' On the contrary. I'm in charge of it.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Commencing download in T-minus two minutes. White Knight has infiltrated sector three. You were right. They are monitoring our movements. How'd you know?
: '''White Knight:''' It's what I would do. Now start evac protocols.
: '''Black Knight:''' I've torn this facility apart looking for that? When I found it, I still couldn't get to it. Bio-feed security system--- Clever. You have to be nanite-free to open it. I guessed you weren't dead. I knew if I let enough info leak about what we're doing here, you'd showed up, eventually. I'll take it.
: '''White Knight:''' You can try.
: '''Black Knight:''' What ever you say. You were the boss.
: '''White Knight:''' That's not a Providence toy.
: '''Black Knight:''' A woman is entitled her secrets, especially when those secrets keep me alive.
: '''White Knight:''' Aah!
: ''[White Knight grunts]''
: ''[Black Knight grunts]''
: '''White Knight:''' Ohh! What I could've done with you if I'd hired you first.
: '''Black Knight:''' Don't fool yourself, White.
: '''White Knight:''' Ohh, ohh, ohh!
: '''Black Knight:''' You were a bandage at best. The Consortium knew that you weren't the leader for the future. Stand down, old man.
: '''White Knight:''' I've got a few secrets of my own, kid. After all, this was my office. Consortium or not, it will be again.
: '''Black Knight:''' Ugh!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Be advised, they're on to us. Making for the rendezvous.
: '''Six:''' I'll take my swords back now. Please.
: '''Rex:''' What are you doing helping Black Knight? She's obviously the more psycho of the two knights.
: '''Caesar:''' I'm not helping the Black Knight do anything. I'm trying to fix things. The day everything changed-- We never imagined what would happen when we released the nanites.
: '''Rex:''' Release them?! You caused the Nanite Event?
: '''Caesar:''' It was the only way we were going to save the world.
: '''Rex:''' You unleashed the worst man-made disaster the world has ever seen. You've ruined countless lives! How can you say that you saved anything?!
: '''Caesar:''' You weren't there-- Not in any way that mattered! If we hadn't--
: '''Rex:''' Hold that thought. Here, doggy, doggy.
: '''Six:''' Excessive?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Sweet, actually.
: ''[Providence Agents screams]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Now you're overdoing it.
: ''[White Knight panting]''
: '''White Knight:''' Are we finished here?
: ''[White Knight screams]''
: '''White Knight:''' Careful, Black. Your council wouldn't be too pleased if you destroyed the very thing you're after.
: '''Black Knight:''' It doesn't have to be like this, White. The Consortium may have lost faith in you, but you know my methods are right. Come back. Under my protection, who knows? There may even be a promotion in it for you.
: '''White Knight:''' You would turn on your own masters?
: '''Black Knight:''' For that kind of power, wouldn't you?
: '''White Knight:''' You would turn on your own masters?
: '''Black Knight:''' For that kind of power, wouldn't you?
: '''White Knight:''' I am going to stop the Consortium. If you or Providence gets in my way, this tape goes public.
: '''Black Knight:''' Wait!
: '''Caesar:''' Rex, stop! You're destroying my work!
: '''Rex:''' Your work is done! And so are we. I got it. Time to blow this--
: '''Black Knight:''' Stand down, Rex. Face it, kiddo-- Today is not your day.
: '''Rex:''' Actually, today's wednesday, and wednesday means fiesta night at the cafeteria. Getting in is going to be cake-- Very dangerous cake. Any bright ideas on how we're getting out?
: '''Bobo:''' I got one word for you, kid-- Plumbing.
: '''Rex:''' I got it. Time to blow this--
: '''Bobo:''' Taco stand.
: '''Providence Agent:''' Aah!
: '''Bobo:''' Me and Van Gogh, unappreciated in our time.
: '''Rex:''' All of that-- Was for that?! I've got nanites-- Billions of them!
: '''White Knight:''' Not like this one, Rex. This is a Meta-Nanite, one of several. Inside it, hardwired into its design is a segment of the original Dominion Code.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Dominion Code? I thought that was a myth.
: '''White Knight:''' I can assure you, doctor, it is very real.
: '''Rex:''' Uh, what?
: '''White Knight:''' In layman's terms, it's the God Code. Each of these Meta-Nanites have a cipher written inside that gives them jurisdiction over different building blocks of the universe-- Matter, antimatter, gravity, magnetism. With the complete code, you can control them. And through them, you control everything.
: '''Rex:''' The Consortium want to be-- Gods?
: '''White Knight:''' If it wasn't for the first Nanite Event scattering the Metas across the world, they might have already succeeded.
: '''Caesar:''' We had to. It was the only way we were going to save the world.
: '''White Knight:''' The game has changed, people. Black Knight has been searching the globe for the other Meta-Nanites. She needs them all to complete the Master Program. As long as we're keeping her secret, she'll hold off. But sooner or later, she'll be coming for this with the full power of Providence and the Consortium at her back. So-- If you wanna move on, forget what I've told you. Now's the time.
: '''Rex:''' You're not getting rid of us that easy, old man. My parents died for this. Black Knight wants war, war she gets.

===Deadzone===
: '''Noah:''' You said it was gonna be fun. You said there'd be hot girls, great bands.
: '''Rex:''' It was an honest mistake. They called it the world's largest british rock festival.
: '''Noah:''' Yeah, because it was a convention for english geologists!
: '''Rex:''' Okay, yes, maybe we did just drive two days for some boring science conference because I didn't actually read past the first paragraph of the website. But we did get some cool free Schwag. Look!
: '''Noah:''' I've seen it. It's a pile of rocks!
: '''Rex:''' No, look!
: '''Feakins:''' Hey! What are you doing? Leave me alone!
: '''Rex:''' Pull over.
: '''Noah:''' You know that guy?
: '''Rex:''' Nope. But I know an opportunity to tweak the Black Knight when I see one.
: '''Noah:''' No way. I haven't showered in two days. You real haven't showered in two days. This car is not stopping until we get home. Real mature.
: '''Rex:''' Just give me five minutes. I'll grab him before they even notice. Think of it this way. At least something fun will come out of this trip. Shh.
: '''Feakins:''' I don't understand what you're saying, guy.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Providence Agent:''' Just take a stay back, Rex. You don't know what you're messing with here.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah, well, you do know what you're messing with! This! Huh?
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Rex:''' Hey! Who's messing with this?
: '''Providence Agent:''' Anything you want to add to that smack talk?
: ''[Rex chuckles nervously]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Providence Agent:''' Let's go.
: '''Rex:''' I don't know what you did to my powers, but I'd keep the hands off the jacket, if I were you. Uh, on second thought, take the jacket. Thinking about a new one anyway.
: '''Providence Agent:''' We're gonna bring him with us? He's harmless as long as we've got Feakins.
: '''Rex:''' What's a Feakin?
: '''Noah:''' Come on, Rex. You gonna stand there all night getting hugs from your old Providence buddies?
: '''Rex:''' No, don't! Or, uh, you're gonna make Agent Six over there even more mad than he already is.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Providence Agent:''' Move!
: '''Feakins:''' Aah! What are you doing, guy?!
: '''Noah:''' So, what's--
: '''Rex:''' Drive! Drive!
: '''Noah:''' Aah! Who is he?! What's going on?
: '''Rex:''' Who are you? What's going on?
: '''Feakins:''' Do either of you have a milkshake?
: '''Providence Agent:''' Pull over!
: '''Noah:''' You want to get them to stop that? What happened?
: '''Rex:''' Let me guess. You're Feakins.
: '''Feakins:''' Yeah, and I am very queasy back here! If we don't get me a milkshake, it's not gonna be my fault if my lunch ends up all over this very nice leather seat!
: '''Rex:''' Somehow he's fritzing out my powers. It's like there's a deadzone around him.
: '''Noah:''' You talking about nanites or his personality?
: '''Providence Agent:''' No more warnings. Pull over!
: '''Noah:''' Whoa!
: ''[Noah gasps]''
: '''Feakins:''' We're not gonna make it!
: '''Noah:''' Yes, we are! This is a '77! They don't make'em like this anymore! WHOO-HOO! Aah!
: ''[Noah gasps]''
: '''Noah:''' That was a '77! They don't make'em anymore! My granddad's gonna kill me!
: '''Rex:''' Looks like he'll have to wait in line.
: ''[Feakins gasps]''
: '''Feakins:''' How great is this?! You guys were at the convention, too?
: '''Rex:''' Come on! If we get out of here now, they'll spend the next couple hours looking for the car before they figure out where it went.
: '''Feakins:''' So, what's your favorite geological area? I'm a proterozoic man. Of course, the hadean has its merits, too.
: '''Noah:''' You couldn't take five minutes to read the whole website?
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Noah:''' Thank you! I can't tell you how glad we are you're open. I just want to get cleaned up and get some sleep.
: '''Feakins:''' Hold on! Pardon me, but what kind of room service does this establishment offer? What if I want a milkshake?
: '''Rex:''' And that kind of brings you up to date, doc.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Well, that explains why you suddenly dropped of my tracking grid. The good news is, the deadzone Feakins creates means the Black Knight can't use your nanites to track you either.
: '''Rex:''' Now that Feakins isn't right next to me, it's not as bad. I can still feel them. It's just that they feel all fuzzy. I bet if I put some distance between us, my powers would bounce right back.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You cannot let him out of your sight, Rex. Don't you see why Black Knight wants him? He's the ultimate insurance against any EVO.
: '''Rex:''' Not just any. Me.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You've got to hang on to him. I'm on my way to you now. 
: '''Rex:''' Hey, don't worry about me. I-I may not have my powers, but I've got Noah. We can handle things until you get here.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Just stay put and don't draw attention to yourself.
: '''Feakins:''' I know this is your motel! But judging by your office, you and me got a different idea of what &quot;clean&quot; means! Can you believe that guy!
: '''Rex:''' Yeah, the last part might be a problem, doc.
: '''Feakins:''' Oh. Okay if you guys take this bed?
: '''Noah:''' Providence we can deal with. It's him I'm worried about.
: '''Black Knight:''' Speak.
: '''Black Pawn:''' We lost them.
: '''Black Knight:''' I want every asset we have in the state mobilized. Do you understand? Find them!
: '''Noah:''' No way! You picked out this disguise. You wear it.
: '''Feakins:''' I didn't know it was made of acrylic! You want me to have a relapse of my eczema? 'Cause it won't be pretty! I get all flaky!
: '''Rex:''' Guys, the whole point of the disguises is to not attract attention.
: '''Noah:''' Fine! Why do I always have to be the mature one?
: '''Rex:''' Come on.
: '''Feakins:''' We've only got a couple hours to get to our new rendezvous with Holiday.
: '''Rex:''' Aren't you going to demand a milkshake?
: '''Feakins:''' Thanks, guy.
: '''Noah:''' What?! All you've done is moan about milkshakes. Because we were in a car. I don't get airsick.
: '''Feakins:''' So, why would I need a milkshake? But if there's a decent sushi bar nearby--
: ''[Noah groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Wait.
: ''[Feakins sneezes]''
: '''Feakins:''' What? I said I was allergic to acrylic!
: '''Rex:''' Hang on!
: '''Feakins:''' Whoa. You gotta stop this thing.
: '''Noah:''' You gotta be kidding me!
: '''Feakins:''' It's not my fault I got a delicate stomach!
: '''Rex:''' Ugh! This isn't even really a car!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Oh!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Those two agents on the plane are gonna call in others. We gotta go!
: '''Noah:''' How are we gonna get anywhere without a car?
: '''Rex:''' We've got a chance we can get on a train.
: '''Noah:''' It's pitch dark. We're never gonna find the tracks before that train passes!
: ''[Feakins laughs]''
: '''Feakins:''' Yeah, very funny. Come on, guy, quit joking around.
: '''Noah:''' What are you talking about?
: '''Feakins:''' Well, given the shale and quartz in this soil, the train tracks have to be down that way. I mean, that's just obvious stuff to rock lovers like us, am I right? I don't believe it! An entire train car filled with ice cream... And there's no blender!
: '''Noah:''' So close, and yet no milkshake.
: '''Rex:''' Well, I'm starved. Let's eat. We're all gonna need our strength. Cherry-Berry Chunky Nut?
: '''Feakins:''' I'm allergic to ice cream.
: '''Rex:''' How can you love milkshakes and be allergic to ice cream?
: '''Noah:''' Do you really want to hear him answer that?
: '''Rex:''' Look, I'm sorry. I know it's been a crazy day for you.
: '''Feakins:''' I woke up yesterday thinking I was just a regular accountant who loved rocks... Only to discover that I'm actually this super-important guy who everyone's after because I got some kind of amazing power!
: '''Rex:''' Lucky you. Move! Move! We're close. We're going to make it to Holiday.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, I can't stay here. We'll have to meet somewhere else.
: '''Rex:''' I see the perfect place.
: '''Black Knight:''' Let's end this game, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' Black Knight?
: '''Feakins:''' I don't believe it. The Black Knight works at Bob's Biscuit Barn!
: '''Black Knight:''' Now that we've found you, there's nowhere to hide. It should not have taken the most advanced satellite system in the world this long to pinpoint them. The excuses can wait. Right now, I want this wrapped up.
: '''Noah:''' How did Black Knight know where we were?
: '''Rex:''' I don't know.
: '''Noah:''' Even if you make it to the Holiday, is Black Knight just gonna find us?
: '''Rex:''' I don't know!
: '''Feakins:''' When are we gonna get a milkshake?!
: '''Rex:''' I don't know!
: '''Feakins:''' I'm in a car. It's moving. I'm getting queasy back here.
: '''Rex:''' Then get out of the car!
: '''Feakins:''' Aah!
: '''Black Pawn:''' Be advised-- Primary target Feakins is to be recovered alive if possible.
: '''Rex:''' You know how I said we don't get through this, with or without my powers? Well, it looks like I was wrong. They're after Feakins. That means &quot;Noah&quot; has a shot at making a break for it and getting to Holiday. Do you understand what I'm saying?
: '''Black Pawn:''' Let the breakaway go. And stay on the primary target.
: '''Rex:''' Huh. I guess they're not afraid of me with you standing here. Which is... Awesome!
: '''Black Pawn:''' Pull up! Pull up!
: '''Rex:''' Mwah! Man, have I missed you!
: '''Noah:''' Guess I don't need this anymore.
: '''Rex:''' I can't believe that plan actually worked.
: '''Noah:''' Feakins still has to make it to Holiday.
: '''Feakins:''' Oh, I'm not feeling so good.
: '''Rex:''' Whoa!
: '''Black Pawn:''' The primary target is unconventional. Ground units, reroute to intercept. We will cover.
: '''Rex:''' We're going after Feakins! Come on!
: '''Pilot:''' Ground units are down. Moving to pursue a primary target.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Black Pawn:''' Stay on Rex. If we don't engage him, he'll tear us apart.
: '''Noah:''' Whoa!
: '''Rex:''' Sit tight.
: '''Noah:''' Uh, where would I go?
: '''Rex:''' Mind if I borrow this?
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Noah:''' Rex!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Providence Agent screams]''
: '''Rex:''' Ow! Hey, watch it! I'm still a little rusty here! These guys are tough.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Aah! Hang on to me!
: '''Noah:''' Aah! Whoa!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Where's Feakins?
: '''Rex:''' Oh, come on! This guy is killing me!
: '''Noah:''' Maybe he'll still coming.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' We can't wait. Providence followed you here. What?
: '''Rex:''' We got him! Let's go!
: '''Noah:''' It's too late.
: '''Black Knight:''' Where is my visual?
: '''Black Pawn:''' They're just gone.
: '''Rex:''' What just happened?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' It's a prototype stealth device built into the lab. That's why I had to get you in here. It was the only way to get you out of Black Knight's sight.
: '''Noah:''' So, that's it?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' That's it. The good guys won.
: '''Rex:''' Oh, hey, by the way, doc, you're a big geology buff, aren't you? So, did we hook you up with the perfect safe house or what? You'll never have to worry about driving without a milkshake again.
: '''Feakins:''' Oh, it's great, guy. The only problem is the gas.
: '''Rex:''' Well, I'm sure we can kick in a little gas money, too.
: ''[Feakins farting]''
: '''Feakins:''' Yeah, that's not what I meant.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, we can't stay.
: '''Rex:''' You got that right!
: '''Feakins:''' Wait. I just wanna say... Its not easy being thrown together with someone who can be a little, well... Difficult.
: '''Rex:''' Hey... You're not so bad.
: '''Feakins:''' Me?! I was talking about you!
: ''[Black Knight sighs]''
: '''Black Knight:''' Since the search for Feakins is going nowhere, we have no choice but to become much more aggressive... With Rex.

===Assault on Abysus===
: '''Diane Farrah:''' Through research and hard work, Providence has turned the curse of the EVO into a blessing. One that will serve mankind. Science and compassion have created a new future for all EVOs. A future filled with happiness and hope.
: '''Black Pawn:''' You? Seen some EVOs pass through here?
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
*Rex and Circe finally admit their true feelings for one another. Unfortunately, there was not enough episodes to explore their romance further.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: ''[Somewhere in [[w:Hong Kong|Hong Kong, China]]'']''
: '''Circe:''' Okay. They're gone.
: '''Skywwd:''' For now. Get out of here, Circe. Run!
: '''Circe:''' I'm not leaving you guys.
: '''Skywwd:''' You can pass as human. Go-- Before Providence gets you too.
: '''Black Pawn:''' The girl! She's with them!
: '''Skwwyd:''' Run!
: '''Rex:''' Hmm? What's up?
: '''Circe:''' You're the only person I could turn to.
: '''Rex:''' Circe?
: '''Circe:''' I don't know. That's the hardest part.
: '''Rex:''' You did what you had to do.
: '''Circe:''' I left them there, Rex. Our friends. Providence has to be stopped. Someone needs to do something.
: '''Rex:''' ''[puts his arms around Circe to comfort her]'' We are.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Am I disturbing you two?
: '''Rex:''' No.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' White Knight wants to talk with you.
: '''Rex:''' Ugh. What's he gonna yell at me for this time?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' No, I meant Circe. He wants to talk to her.
: '''Circe:''' Providence has been hunting these down, too?
: '''White Knight:''' You didn't tell her about them, Rex?
: '''Rex:''' I thought the Master Control Nanites were supposed to be top secret.
: '''White Knight:''' She has to know if she's going to lead the mission.
: '''Rex:''' Her? That was supposed to be my mission.
: '''White Knight:''' It's no one's mission. It's about getting the job done.
: '''Circe:''' Why me?
: '''White Knight:''' Intelligence indicates that Providence has targeted a Master Control Nanite in Abysus. In Van Kleiss' old castle, to be more precise. You're the only one with the knowledge to get us in there.
: '''Rex:''' I've been there before. How hard could it be? Circe, you don't have to.
: '''Circe:''' If it helps stop Black Knight in Providence, I'm in.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, Doc. We made it. The new power suit gave me more range, just like you said.
: ''[Circe whistles]''
: '''Circe:''' Thanks, Banak. We're trying to keep a low profile. Don't tell anyone, okay?
: '''Rex:''' Good thing you knew the secret whistle or we might have been rooting around forever.
: ''[Rex chuckles]''
: '''Rex:''' Get it? &quot;Root&quot;? Uh... This can't be easy coming back here. I owe you.
: '''Circe:''' Forget it. We're even. I used you in the past, now you and your friends are using me.
: '''Rex:''' Is there some sort of problem between you and me?
: '''Circe:''' There's nothing between you and me. Just the mission. I don't have good memories of this place. Let's just leave it at that, okay?
: '''Rex:''' Fine. I'm surprised we haven't run into-- Ugh!
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: '''Skalamander:''' Traitor! Stop her!
: '''Circe:''' Aah!
: '''Rex:''' Can you chill?! There's no time for this. Who's leading you now that Van Kleiss is gone? I need to speak to your leader. Figures. Biowolf, we have a problem. And... I need your help.
: '''Biowulf:''' I will listen.
: '''Rex:''' Great, because--
: '''Biowulf:''' Only after you. earn the right-- Through combat.
: ''[Biowulf growls]''
: ''[Rex spits]''
: '''Rex:''' At least Van Kleiss was civilized. Buckle up, dog boy.
: '''Biowulf:''' You may speak. This nanite you want-- It's not here. None of us have seen it up in the castle or the blast source.
: '''Rex:''' I didn't say up. It's down. White Knight thinks it's under the castle. Some other secure lab area.
: '''Biowulf:''' The primary chamber?
: '''Circe:''' It's under the castle? Van Kleiss always said it was forbidden for us to go there.
: '''Rex:''' You think he remembered to tell Black Knight that? Let me take it out of here.
: '''Biowulf:''' No! You're a traitor to your own kind. A lapdog to these humans. I've heard enough!
: '''Rex:''' All of us will fall-- All EVOs-- If she gets it. Black Knight is worse than you know. If I don't get the nanite out of here, Providence will take it.
: '''Biowulf:''' Providence! This is Abysus, the heart of the EVO world. Providence wouldn't dare.
: '''Circe:''' The sentries have spotted something.
: '''Rex:''' Yeah. I wonder who.
: '''Providence Soldier:''' Black Knight, the assault forces are in place.
: '''Black Knight:''' The field is yours. We've secured the borders. No chance White Knight and his team will get in the country to interfere.
: '''Biowulf:''' The castle is surrounded.
: '''Rex:''' Standard operating procedure for Providence is to secure the perimeter, then close for attack. Black Knight will have snuck forces around back.
: '''Skalamander:''' How should we counter?
: '''Rex:''' Easy.
: '''Biowulf:''' You take your nanite. I'll decide how to deal with the invaders.
: '''Black Pawn:''' Deploy the collars. Rise. Forward. Attack.
: '''Rex:''' The nanite event blew away half the castle. This must have been deep enough to survive it. Huh? You hear that?
: '''Circe:''' No. Hear what?
: '''Rex:''' Uh... Nothing. This place would make a great rec room. Maybe a karaoke machine over there--
: '''Circe:''' Van Kleiss would send volunteers down here to try and get in. None of them ever came back.
: '''Rex:''' Well... That's encouraging.
: '''Circe:''' What is it?
: '''Rex:''' They're... I-I think they're nanites. They're following our lights. They can't see in the dark. I have a plan. Lead them back.
: '''Circe:''' ''[concerned]'' Rex?
: '''Rex:''' When I say &quot;roll,&quot; roll.
: '''Circe:''' What?!
: '''Rex:''' Roll! Circe, sing!
: ''[Circe uses her ultrasonic blasts on the EVOs and beams at Rex.]''
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: '''Rex:''' We always made a good team.
: '''Circe:''' It won't hold them long.
: '''Rex:''' You think this is why Van Kleiss always wanted me-- So I could get him in here?
: '''Biowulf:''' Providence has breached the castle. We can't hold our position much longer.
: '''Rex:''' Go. I'll get the Master-Control Nanite. ''[Notices how worried Circe is about him probably not returning]'' This isn't Hong Kong. I'll be okay. I'll meet up with you soon.
: '''Biowulf:''' They've turned our own people against us.
: '''Circe:''' Let me see what I can do.
: ''[Circe uses her ultrasonic bursts on several collared EVOs]''.
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: ''[Circe gasping]''
: '''Circe:''' So many.
: '''Biowulf:''' You can't stop the ones they've collared.
: '''Circe:''' I can go down trying.
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: '''Black Pawn:''' Her sonics are disrupting the offensive.
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: '''Black Pawn:''' Hyah! Unh!
: '''Biowulf:''' If we can't defeat them, we'll take down as many as we can fighting.
: '''Circe:''' This isn't one battle. It's a war. And we can't let it end here before Rex has the Master-Control Nanite.
: '''Biowulf:''' What, then?
: '''Circe:''' Tactical retreat.
: ''[Circe whistles]''
: '''Rex:''' Huh. Dad.
: '''Providence Soldier:''' Outer rooms of the castle secured.
: '''Black Pawn:''' I don't need you here, Black Knight. It's only a matter of time. We will take the castle piece by piece.
: ''[Skalamander growling]''
: '''Black Pawn:''' You are ours now. Down.
: ''[Skalamander grunting]''
: '''Skalamander:''' Rex is here. He will make you bow to us!
: '''Black Knight:''' This is all a diversion. Find Rex before he gets the Master-Control Nanite.
: '''Black Pawn:''' Yes, ma'am.
: '''Black Knight:''' Either you do it or I will. I'm on my way.
: '''Rex:''' This place-- Rylander had the same type of lab.
: '''Computer:''' Security system engaged.
: '''Rex:''' No!
: '''Computer:''' Intruder. Provide authorized identity or be terminated. Identify. Identify. Identify. Identify.
: '''Rex:''' Aah! I'm Rex! Rex Salazar!
: '''Computer:''' Salazar genetype-- Accepted.
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex:''' There you are, you little troublemaker. You're coming home with the good guys. Uhh. Weird. Uh... I don't suppose you're looking for the karaoke machine? Running into you-- What a coincidence. Come down here a lot? Whoa! Missed me.
: '''Black Pawn:''' I have the nanite. Keep the boy busy while I get it to Black Knight.
: '''Rex:''' No!
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: '''Rex:''' You two sure know how to make an entrance.
: '''Circe:''' The others are getting hammered by Provindence. They're barely holding them off in the dungeon.
: '''Rex:''' Gee! Van Kleiss has a dungeon. What a surprise.
: '''Biowulf:''' This is no joke. They might die because I came down here to save you.
: '''Rex:''' I won't let them get taken. I promise you that. But I need you to let me call the shots.
: ''[Biowulf sighs]''
: '''Biowulf:''' Very well.
: '''Rex:''' Circ, dungeon left or right?
: '''Circe:''' Left. The dungeon's the other way.
: '''Rex:''' I'm not looking for the dungeon. I'm looking for the scouts.
: '''Black Pawn:''' Nothing.
: '''Rex:''' Well, maybe a little something.
: ''[Circe echoing roar]''
: '''Rex:''' Scouts. Classic Providence tactics-- So they don't get ambushed. Uhh. What is this place?
: '''Biowulf:''' The old reservoir. It goes to the river.
: '''Rex:''' Perfect. ''[deep voice]'' Scout to command. West wing, reservoir-- We've found a back way onto what must be the main EVO force. It's five times the size of what you're fighting.
: '''Black Pawn:''' Roger, scout. All forces, withdraw from dungeon siege. Report to west wing, reservoir. Ambush maneuver lambda.
: '''Rex:''' ''[normal voice]'' Get your troops. It's bath time.
: '''Biowulf:''' Now you bow to Rex!
: '''Rex:''' The Providence goons are contained, Biowulf. They shouldn't be any more trouble. And I got the Master-Control Nanite. Looks like mission accomplished.
: '''Circe:''' Rex, I--
: ''[She and Rex cling to each other as the castle begins shaking.]''
: '''Black Knight:''' Rex, order your friends to surrender. You're all under Providence custody. I always knew it might be impossible to capture the Master-Control Nanite in the heart of the nanite infestation. So the solution was to remove it.
: '''Circe:''' It's Hong Kong all over again.
: '''Rex:''' No. We can fight. We'll double back and-- A-and then--
: '''Biowulf:''' Go! Get the nanite out of here!
: '''Rex:''' No! I promised you!
: '''Biowulf:''' You were right. That nanite is more important than anyone here. Including myself. I am the leader. I give the orders. Run!
: ''[Rex panting]''
: '''Rex:''' They were counting on me. I don't want to leave them.
: '''Circe:''' I did what I had to do. You do what you have to. I want you to know, all this was never about me just using you.
: ''[Circe gasps]''
: ''[Finally admits her true romantic feelings for Rex in the form of a passionate kiss. She then pushes a shocked Rex off the ledge, so he could escape; and her getting collared and captured in his stead. She smiled with tears in her eyes, with the promise that she would be okay.]''
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Rex:''' ''[burdened by Circe admitting her intense love for him and sacrifice]'' We all make sacrifices for the things we care about-- The people we love. But when the stakes are this high, who can we trust? What would that power do to anyone who had it? They attacked Abysus. What's stopping them from attacking us for these nanites?
: '''White Knight:''' They will-- Sooner or later. That's why I want to turn the tables on them first.
: '''Rex:''' You know how to do that so we survive in one piece?
: '''White Knight:''' Not yet.

===Remote Control===
: '''Bobo:''' Providence goons are thick as fleas tonight, and I know fleas.
: '''Rex:''' We're gonna be late if we have to keep sneaking around.
: '''Bobo:''' After you.
: '''Skwydd:''' Rex must have bailed on us-- Again.
: '''Cricket:''' He would never do that, Skwydd. And besides, he dad to fly all the way to Honk Kong on his own. Give him some time.
: '''Tuck:''' He's here! Everything okay, Rex?
: ''[Skwydd hissing]''
: '''Skwydd:''' Cricket, Tuck, this way!
: ''[Skwydd grunts]''
: '''Skwydd:''' Ow. Yeah, I think I'll stick to ink.
: '''Cricket:''' We need to find Rex.
: '''Skwydd:''' He was supposed to find us.
: '''Tuck:''' How are we gonna--
: '''Quarry:''' Wrong. They'll be coming with me. Anybody got a problem with that?
: ''[Quarry laughs]''
: ''[Quarry grunting]''
: '''Rex:''' Tuck? Cricket? Skwydd?
: '''Bobo:''' Oh, yeah, they were here. This came out of Skwydd. Mm.
: '''Rex:''' Ew! If those Providence goons hurt them, I'm gonna--
: '''Bobo:''' What do you say you use a little of that aggression and get some answers, champ?
: '''Rex:''' What did you do with my friends? Quarry?
: '''Cricket:''' If you think we're going to thank you for getting us out of there, Quarry.
: ''[Quarry laughs]''
: '''Quarry:''' I think you're going to do exactly as I say.
: ''[Activates the mind-control collar on her neck]''
: '''Cricket:''' Aah!
: '''Bobo:''' Occupied Hong Kong-- What a dump! Where to, chief?
: '''Rex:''' I have no idea. How did he get away from Van Kleiss? How is he even alive?
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex:''' It's cool. We're not going to hurt you. What's Providence turned into? This whole city is living in fear.
: '''Bobo:''' Well, we ain't gonna find my answers in this alley. I got a guide book. Ooh! A coupon for all-you-can-eat dim sum. What? A chimp's gotta eat.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, let's go. But keep moving. Maybe we'll turn up a clue.
: '''Bobo:''' Aw, this just breaks my heart. All that grub and no one to eat it.
: '''Monster EVO:''' Can you help a fellow EVO who's down on his luck?
: '''Rex:''' I can do better than that. Let me take care of this for you.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Ow!
: '''Bobo:''' I wanna order some chow to go. Give me some of those chicken feet, and give me the beaks, too.
: '''Rex:''' I thought that collar was supposed to make you mellow! What? Now you know Kung Fu? I don't have time for this.
: '''Bobo:''' Hey, buddy. It looked like you could use some-- Hey, where'd the charity case go?
: '''Rex:''' He had to leave suddenly. All yours. I need some time to think.
: '''Bobo:''' More for me! Go off and think your brains out, pal. You know where to find me. Ah, this could be the start of a beautiful friendship, my beak-dealing chum. And speaking of chum--
: ''[Bobo sniffs]''
: '''Bobo:''' Do I detect the delightful aroma of fish heads?
: '''Gamer boy:''' Hey, kid! You like video games? Want a cool job?
: '''Rex:''' I already have a cool job.
: '''Gamer boy:''' This is the coolest job you'll ever have. Mr. Quarry, pays top dollar for good players and I can set you up.
: '''Rex:''' Quarry? Tell me more.
: '''Huckster:''' ''[Cockney accent]'' Okay, kids. Looks like we're all here, right? Let me show you around.
: '''Quarry:''' What do you matter, the big fish? Time to reel him in.
: '''Huckster:''' This is all state-of-the-art stuff-- Exciting, new tech. You get to play as an EVO and go on a Crown Street. How cool is that?
: '''Rex:''' Hey! That looks like the EVO that jumped me.
: '''Huckster:''' We model our characters from actual EVOs. This is as close to reality as you can get.
: '''Rex:''' Hey! You guys! Oh, am I glad to see you! I-- Take that back. You've been collared! Let me help you!
: ''[Skwydd hissing]''
: '''Rex:''' Cricket, it's me-- Rex! You used to have a crush on me!
: '''Cricket:''' Ugh!
: ''[Cricket sighs]''
: '''Cricket:''' Rex, I'm so sorry. I knew what I was doing, but I couldn't control it.
: '''Rex:''' I'm okay, Cricket. You've been working on that jab, though, haven't you?
: '''Cricket:''' They're getting away.
: '''Rex:''' Let them go. They'll lead us straight to Quarry.
: '''Cricket:''' &quot;Used to have a crush&quot;?
: '''Rex:''' Infrared. Nice move. Providence Convoy. Great.
: '''Cricket:''' Whoa! Aah! Ugh! Aah!
: '''Rex:''' Come on, Cricket. We do this all the time. Uh, hair. Please.
: '''Bobo:''' Hey, give me some more of these deep-fried shrimp heads and a bunch of those fresh spring rolls. Hey, give me the stale spring rolls while you're at it.
: '''Female vendor:''' No more food! You have to go!
: '''Cricket:''' I recognize this place. It's where Quarry took us after we were collared. It's probably a setup.
: '''Rex:''' It's definitely a setup. You ready to go in?
: '''Cricket:''' You know how collared EVOs follow kind of like a robot. with these collars, it's worse. It's like you're a remote-controlled robot.
: '''Rex:''' That is a nasty hack.
: '''Cricket:''' It's bad enough working for Quarry. When you have free will but this--
: '''Rex:''' Skwydd! Tuck! I don't wanna hurt you.
: '''Quarry:''' Glad to hear that, Rex. Your friends are very valuable to me as are you.
: '''Rex:''' Like the new look- strapping.
: '''Quarry:''' Let's just say I had to find a way to &quot;keep it together&quot; after my visit to Abyus. Just one more thing you owe me for and you know how much I like a balanced book.
: '''Cricket:''' Rex! No!
: '''Quarry:''' You'll be the crown jewel of my EVO army, Rex. I may just make you my own personal slave. That collar suits you, Rex. Wish I'd had one for you back in the old days-- Would've saved me a lot of trouble.
: '''Cricket:''' Rex!
: '''Quarry:''' Oh, right. Cricket. Rex, be a good little helper and hold her down, would you?
: ''[Cricket gasps]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Quarry:''' Rex? Rex! I command you to stop!
: '''Rex:''' I quit listening to you a long time ago.
: '''Skwydd:''' Rex, I'm sorry.
: '''Rex:''' Never mind, Skwydd. Help me with Tuck. Aah! Oh, man! These nanites are smarter than usual.
: '''Cricket:''' Hurry, Rex!
: '''Rex:''' Whew! Don't think I'll be doing that again soon.
: '''Tuck:''' Thanks, man. Those all kinds of weird.
: '''Quarry:''' I've decided that you brats are not that valuable to me. Kill them all!
: '''Rex:''' We'll see.
: '''Tuck:''' Spinning donkey? Since when do street EVOs know Kung Fu?
: '''Rex:''' I know, right? How are you doing this? How are you controlling these guys.
: '''Quarry:''' I'm not would take an army of operators to control this many EVOs. I merely provide the funding and equipment. The streets provide the manpower-- Or should I say--
: ''[Quarry chuckles]''
: '''Quarry:''' Bratpower? And I paid top dollar for good players. At least by their sad standards.
: '''Rex:''' The arcade. All those kids!
: '''Quarry:''' Those brats were born to play games, which is what they think they're doing. And I thank your people for the tech. That brother of yours is quite the wiz, kid.
: '''Rex:''' Caesar would never!
: '''Cricket:''' Forget about Caesar, Rex. You know what you've got to do.
: '''Rex:''' These guys will shred you if I leave!
: '''Tuck:''' We got this, Rex. Go!
: '''Quarry:''' Once I get my hands on you, I'm gonna pop your head like a grape!
: '''Bobo:''' Oh, I am one stuffed monkey. Ooh, this might just be the year I floss. Hey! I know that noise. That's Rex. I'm coming, champ!
: ''[Bobo groans]''
: '''Bobo:''' Ooh, I better take it easy, or I'm gonna deliver a street pizza.
: ''[Bobo groans]''
: '''Female vendor:''' Next time, you're on the menu!
: '''Rex:''' Ugh! Unh!
: '''Quarry:''' You were a good earner once, Rex. But lately, you've been costing me too much.
: '''Rex:''' Ugh!
: '''Quarry:''' Now... you... pay!
: '''Cricket:''' No tongues!
: ''[Rex groaning]''
: '''Rex:''' Hyah!
: ''[Quarry laughs evilly]''
: '''Quarry:''' Consider the fact that you made me like this while I'm crushing you.
: ''[Quarry grunting]''
: '''Quarry:''' What?
: ''[Quarry straining]''
: '''Quarry:''' No! Unh! No! AAAAAH!
: '''Rex:''' Bad move, Quarry. Now, where's the &quot;off&quot; switch? Bingo.
: ''[Rex sighs]''
: '''Rex:''' Okay.
: '''Tuck:''' Uh, what just happened?
: '''Cricket:''' Rex happened.
: '''Gamer boy:''' No way. We were actually fighting real people? I'm outta here.
: '''Tuck:''' Nice move, Rex. I guess Quarry eats it again.
: '''Cricket:''' Where is Quarry, Rex?
: '''Rex:''' He bit off more than he could chew. Speaking of which, I'm starved. Who wants to grab a bite?
: '''Bobo:''' Ohh. Hey, Rex, when are we gonna see some action?
: '''Rex:''' I, uh, kind of took the initiative while you were chilling out. Wanna get some dim sum?
: ''[Bobo gags]''
: '''Bobo:''' Uh, no, thanks. I've had all I can eat.
: ''[Bobo gags]''
: '''Rex:''' Can we use your coupon?
: ''[Bobo gags]''
: '''Skwydd:''' You seriously thought you were gonna blow us off?
: '''Tuck:''' Not &quot;we.&quot; &quot;You.&quot;
: '''Rex:''' I came as soon as I could-- Honest.
: '''Cricket:''' You mean you didn't make a detour to Tokyo to buy anime?
: '''Rex:''' Okay, almost as soon. But it all turned out fine. And the most important thing is, we put a stop to that tech before there was enough of it to start a real army.
: '''Tuck:''' You can say that again.
: '''Skwydd:''' ''[Chuckling]'' Yeah.
: '''Rex:''' Now, hurry up and eat this before my chimp finds us. Mmm!
: '''Build worker:''' Okay, guys. That's the last of them. Provindence needs these machines on the next cargo ship. Let's move!

===A Brief History of Time===
: '''Van Kleiss:''' 4.000 years from my destination, and I've run out of of time. I've scarcely completed the vessel which shall deliver me to my own era. Gharun-Set, activate the traps-- Quickly! My greatest creation-- So useful to me, but too dangerous to roam free. If only I had time to destroy him, as I should. But I have a more pressing death I must prevent. My own. AAAAAAAAAAAH!
: '''Rex:''' Kind of defeating the whole stealth element of a stealth suit, Bobo.
: '''Bobo:''' Hey, now was I supposed to know that ghanoush went bad?
: '''Rex:''' Maybe because you found it in a garbage can.
: '''Bobo:''' On top of a garbage can.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Holiday to Rex. Are you at the site?
: '''Rex:''' There is not site, remember? Black Knight blew the pace to kingdom come.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Yet it's still guarded. And thanks to the data you stole from Providence, we know why.
: '''Rex:''' Van Kleiss back in time? I still find it hard to believe.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You were sent six months into the future, Rex. It stands to reason that the reverse is possible.
: '''Rex:''' Well, if you expect to find him here, maybe we should check the mummy museum. We're sensing nanites-- Definitely V.K.'s. They've been dead a long time.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Over 4,000 years. I'm also detecting tachyons-- Quantum particles that travel in time. I think it's clear what he was making.
: '''Bobo:''' A latrine?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' A time machine.
: '''Rex:''' No way he pulled it off! If mister ego made it back to here and now, we'd know about it.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Some of these nanites are considerably younger. That means he was there in two different time periods.
: '''Rex:''' Time travel gives me a headache. Just tell me-- Where is he now?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' The more accurate question is, when is he?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' AAAAAAH!
: ''[Van Kleiss gasping]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Ugh! The ordeal is... draining. But now, back in my own time, I can replenish my nanite reserves and--
: '''Gladiator #1:''' Quis es tu?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I recognize the language, of course-- Classical latin. Qui-- Q-Qui annus est?
: '''Gladiator #1:''' What year is it? You dare question a captain of the imperial guard? Aegyptus is a roman Providence! Answer! Who are you?
: '''Gladiator #2:''' Don't bother-- He's clearly sun-mad.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' The dialect, the dress-- This is the second century A.D. A mere 2,000 years has passed. I'm only halfway home!
: '''Gladiator #1:''' Another escaped slave. Finish him and be done with it.
: ''[Gladiator #2 grunts]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' It was all the fight I could muster. I had no way to replace the nanites I'd spent in the journey, and my gauntlet had yet to recharge those that remained.
: '''Gladiator #2:''' This one shows spirit. He'll bring a good price in the arena.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' OOMPH!
: ''[Van Kleiss groans]''
: '''Gladiator #2:''' Save your strength.
: '''Gladiator #3:''' Where you're going, you'll need it.
: ''[Van Kleiss slurps]''
: ''[Van Kleiss gulps]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I intend to. Of the mysterious force, there is no sign. Yet I sense it is close-- Pursuing me even across the centuries. I am convinced it is a manifestation of time itself. My presence is a violation of physics-- An imbalance which the time stream seeks to correct... By wiping me from existence. But of this, I am certain-- If I do not return to my own time, it will surely destroy me.
: '''Gladiator #1:''' You are fortunate, slave. To die in the arena is a great honor.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' An honor I look forward to bestowing.
: ''[Gladiator #1 laughs]''
: '''Gladiator #1:''' You see? Spirit!
: ''[Van Kleiss groans]''
: '''Gladiator #3:''' Put on a good show, little man, and I promise to make your end a painless one.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Indeed?
: ''[Gladiator #3 grunts]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I, on the other hand, make no such promise.
: ''[Gladiator #3 grunting]''
: ''[Van Kleiss grunting]''
: '''Gladiator #3:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
: ''[Gladiator #3 groans]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' One against so many? Hardly seems fair. For them.
: '''Gladiator #4:''' ARRRGHHHH!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Ordinarily, I'd say &quot;take me to your leader,&quot; but I believe he's already here.
: '''Septimius Severus:''' Great warrior... Never have I seen such a battle. I am...
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Septimius Severus, 21st emperor of Rome, founder of the severan dynasty. And, as I recall, you poisoned your own commanding officer to get his position... And wear only boots to conceal a prodigious clubfoot.
: '''Septimius Severus:''' Are you a man... Or a God?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I find both labels rather limiting. Now, then, you are going to give me whatever I require, starting with a quiet place to work. I, in return, shall ensure the growth and security of your reign as emperor. You may call me Van Kleiss.
: '''Septimius Severus:''' Whatever your desire, great Vanklios.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Actually, it's... Got a rather nice ring.
: '''Rex:''' What's with this guy? Gets a portrait done in every time period?
: '''Bobo:''' Mm. ''[muffled]'' Truly a nutjob for the ages. Mm. Speaking of nuts... Want some?
: '''Rex:''' You've been dumpster-diving again?
: '''Bobo:''' I prefer &quot;foraging.&quot;
: '''Rex:''' Yeah. Nice sleuthing there, doc.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Nanites decay at a measurable half-life. I set our sat-net to do a global scan for the same frequency-- Ergo, Rome.
: '''Rex:''' Great. You scan for the next stop, we'll grab a pizza.
: '''Bobo:''' Pass. I'm experiencing inexpicable gastric distress.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, it would take months to scan the entire spectrum. You need to find the next decay frequency.
: '''Rex:''' Kind of like nanite connect-the-dots! Can I do it with someone else?
: '''Bobo:''' Hey, quiet, you! Rah!
: '''Rex:''' This goose chase just got a little wilder. My brother's here.
: '''Caesar:''' Caesar to Black. We've detected paleo-nanites. Tachyon readings negative. We're moving to the next hot stop.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Tachyons-- They want Van Kleiss' time machine. Follow them.
: '''Rex:''' Come on.
: '''Bobo:''' Can you give me a teeny sec? I gotta find the little gladiators' room.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Advances in the last two millenia have allowed me to complete my lab in weeks instead of months. Restrict the flow! Do you want to overload the power cells? Meanwhile, my own nanite supply continues to dwindle.
: ''[Septimius Severus panting]''
: '''Septimius Severus:''' Great Vanklios, protect me!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I've divulged metallurgy and tactics beyond your day. No man may threaten your rule.
: '''Septimius Severus:''' This is no man-- But an apparition!
: ''[Septimius Severus grunts]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' What apparition? Speak, parasite!
: '''Septimius Severus:''' A spirit of doom! Numerous sightings-- The insulare, the rostra, the forum. Listen! It comes! It comes!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Fool. It only wants me.
: '''Septimius Severus:''' Ugh!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I release you. Go start a few legends.
: '''Septimius Severus:''' NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
: ''[Septimius Severus gasps]''
: '''Septimius Severus:''' Be gone! I beg of you! Aah!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, those stress lines-- It's the same pattern we saw in Egypt.
: '''Black Knight:''' Report.
: '''Caesar:''' These aqueducts are truly marvels of roman engineering.
: '''Black Knight:''' Have you picked up the next decay frequency?
: '''Caesar:''' Oh-- That. Yes. Uplinking to our global net. Odd. These tachyons seems unrelated to--
: '''Black Knight:''' We have the next target. Scandinavia. Move out. White Knight may have people on the trail. I expect you to do whatever it takes to procure the objective.
: '''Rex:''' Shh!
: '''Caesar:''' I've initiated the same steps as in Egypt! Come along.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, we need that decay frequency.
: '''Rex:''' Just one small problem, doc. This place... is toast.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex? Bobo? Respond!
: '''Rex:''' We're okay, doc. Not a mark on us.
: '''Bobo:''' Same can't be said for my stealth suit. Whoa!
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: ''[Rex and Bobo gasps]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' So many lives... It's become a blur. I don't know who I am anymore. Only that I must sail onward, ever onwoard down the river of time. Never resting, always moving. Further draining my nanite reserves beyond my ability to replenish. And each re-emergence, I am pursued by the nameless force. I now know it's personal. I am a virus-- An infection of space-time. Call it what you like. This is time's antibody. Whether I can borne home or drowned in its currents, this is my final journey.
: '''Rex:''' Hurry! I'm not sure if we here followed.
: '''Bobo:''' I'm sure.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Don't shoot! It's me.
: '''Rex:''' Holiday? Shouldn't you be at the plant, connecting the dots?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' No more dots to connect. The trail ends here. And... I'm reading a humanoid form inside.
: '''Rex:''' I'm confused. Is it a time machine or isn't it?
: '''Caesar:''' It's not a time machine. Are those really necessary?
: '''Rex:''' No way you're getting this time machine, bro!
: '''Caesar:''' I don't want it. And it's not a time machine.
: '''Bobo:''' Well, then, what is it? A meat locker for cold cuts?
: '''Caesar:''' Surprisingly close. We use this technique to transfer unstable nanites. It puts them into a state of dormancy.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Of course. It's a hibernation chamber.
: '''Caesar:''' Only his nanites were dormant. There would still be neuron flow.
: '''Rex:''' Mind telling me what that means, exactly?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' He was... Aware. The whole time, for hundreds of years.
: '''Caesar:''' He would have felt every minute pass.
: '''Rex:''' No way! He's totally a mummy!
: '''Rex and Bobo:''' Wah!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Run! It's coming! It's coming?!
: '''Rex and Bobo:''' Wah!
: '''Rex:''' Easy, easy, Van Kleiss. You're back-- Back in your own time.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' No! No, it'll find me! It always does! You must protect me.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Tachyon readings off the chart! Rex, you can't affect that thing. I don't know what can.
: '''Caesar:''' It's a field of pure tachyons. I've got to get a sample.
: '''Rex:''' Oh, no, you don't!
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I'm back! Back in my own time! You shall not have me?! OHHHH!
: '''Bobo:''' Settle down, Van Winkle.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Rex shudders]''
: '''Rex:''' Oh, no. It couldn't be. I need some way to contain it!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Tachyons can't be contained!
: '''Caesar:''' Yes, they can. Rex!
: ''[Caesar grunts]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, it's too risky!
: '''Rex:''' But I know what this is. Correction-- I know who this is.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex:''' Aah!
: ''[Rex groaning]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' It's... Breach.
: '''Rex:''' Breach. Breach! It's me-- Rex.
: '''Breach:''' Rex? Are you real... Or a dream?
: ''[Rex laughs]''
: '''Rex:''' Yeah, yeah, I'm-- I'm real.
: '''Breach:''' I was everywhere-- Everywhen. But I was nothing-- An emptiness, needing to be filled.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' The amp pack. Van Kleiss controlled it. When his nanites were active, Breach was drawn into his timeframe.
: ''[Van Kleiss grunts]''
: '''Caesar:''' The final joining would have destroyed them both.
: '''Breach:''' Guess I should say thanks.
: '''Rex:''' Hey, what are friends for? Um, we are still friends... Right?
: '''Caesar:''' You did well, little bro.
: '''Rex:''' And you have your time machine that... isn't a time machine. Everybody goes home happy.
: '''Caesar:''' That? A curiosity-- True. But it was never our goal.
: ''[Van Kleiss shivering]''
: ''[Van Kleiss chuckles]''
: '''Rex:''' Van Kleiss?! All this for him? what, they're gonna put him in jail?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' It's Providence, Rex. That's their jurisdiction.
: '''Caesar:''' No need to worry, little brother. He's going to be well supervised.
: '''Rex:''' Caesar, what is going on!?
: '''Caesar:''' Justice.
: '''Bobo:''' Two words-- Crème Brûlée. Ooh. Right after I make a french connection.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Ugh!
: '''Black Knight:''' Welcome back, Van Kleiss. You look terrible. Ordinarily, I'd say get some rest, but you've had enough of that, I suppose.
: ''[Van Kleiss chuckles]''
: '''Black Knight:''' Pull it together. We have work to do. Do you know who I am?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Yes. I know who you are. It's been a long time. A very, very long time.

===Mind Games===
: '''Rex''': Yeah, I wouldn't be so sure of that.
: '''Six''': I told you not to get involved, Rex. You're not at full strength.
: '''Rex''': What was I supposed to do-- Just leave it?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Six has a point, Rex. You're pushed to the edge lately. You can't see everyone.
: '''Rex''': Not listening! Don't worry, dude. I'll have you out of here before you can say-- Circe?!
: '''Circe''': Hey, Rex. Rex! Aaaah!
: ''[Circe sighs]''
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Rex! Rex, do you read? What's going on? Your bios are low.
: '''Rex''': Leave her alone! You okay? 
: '''Circe''': I think so. We have to go.
: '''Rex''': Think that's your cue. Hang on. I think I got it. Ow!
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex''': Hate this things.
: '''Circe''': Try wearing one.
: '''Rex''': I have. So, what happened? I thought Providence had you at Abysus.
: '''Circe''': I got away.
: '''Rex''': What about the Pack?
: '''Circe''': The Pack? I-- Don't know. Things are bad out there, Rex. I've been on the run for weeks. Providence has been stepping up their capture orders. I think something big is going down.
: '''Rex''': Tell me about it. Listen, I know we're gonna want to say no, but with everything that's going on...
: '''Circe''': I should stay at the plant. It's safer, right?
: '''Rex''': Wow, that was-- Easy. I had a whole speech and everything.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Well, everything checks out. You're the picture of health. I wish you'd let me do some more thorough scans, through.
: '''Six''': How was it you said you got away?
: '''Circe''': It's a long story. You guys have bigger things to worry about than me... like the Meta-Nanites. Did you get the one from Abysus? Have you found anymore?
: '''Rex''': Ugh, who cares? Let's go do something fun. You want to put Bobo' hand in shaving cream?
: ''[Circe yawns]''
: '''Circe''': Actually, Rex, I'm kind of tired. I thing I might just crash if that's cool.
: '''Rex''': Oh... yeah. Stupid of me. You, uh, get some sleep. Hey, doc. What are you doing?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Rex. I was just... working. What are you doing up?
: '''Rex''': Ah, it's... stupid.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Yeah, probably. But... go ahead.
: '''Rex''': I'm... excited. Since I got breached, everything's been so crazy.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Since you got breached? Right.
: '''Rex''': But with Circe back, I'm starting to think maybe things will turn out okay.
: '''White Knight''': I need everyone in the situation room in five minutes.
: '''Rex''': So much for that.
: ''[Dr. Holiday yawns]''
: '''Dr. Holiday''': What'd I miss?
: '''Rex''': Wow, Doc. You sure got comfy quick.
: '''White Knight''': Listen up, people. We need to retrieve a valuable asset before it falls into enemy hands.
: '''Six''': What's the objective?
: '''White Knight''': This man... Dr. Peter Meechum.
: '''Rex''': That guy? I remember him. Van crazy kiddnaped his daughter.
: '''White Knight''': Meechum spent the last year at a safehouse facility... Codename: Pandora's Box... location know only to me.
: '''Rex''': Why all the cloak and dagger?
: '''White Knight''': Because Meechum was one of the original scientists on the Nanite Project. He was given a panic button in case of emergency. Thirty minutes ago-- He activated it.
: '''Six''': Providence?
: '''White Knight''': We have to assume they're trying to assemble the original members of the Nanite Project. What Meechum knows is too valuable to fall into the wrong hands, so go get him.
: '''Six''': Maybe Circe should stay here.
: '''Rex''': What? Why?
: '''Six''': She's not on the team yet-- Not officialy.
: '''White Knight''': Take her. She'll be useful in the field.
: '''Rex''': Ahem. You guys forget you key? Did you check under the mat?
: '''Six''': Rex, focus on the mission. Get to Meechum!
: '''Rex''': Relax, Six. I could take these guys in my sleep, especially with help from... Huh? Circe? Uh... Time-out?
: '''Six''': Peter Meechum, you need to come with us.
: ''[Dr. Meechum scoffs]''
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Took you long enough.
: '''Rex''': Time in.
: '''White Knight''': Still no sign of Circe, Rex. We'll keep looking, but for right now, Meechum is our top priority.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': We'll find her, Rex. Don't worry.
: '''White Knight''': In the meantime, Dr. Meechum, I've checked, and your daughter is safe at her boarding school in England.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': My daughter. Right.
: '''White Knight''': We can make immediate arrangements to take you to her.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': No, I'd rather stay with you if that's all right. It's, uh-- It's safer.
: '''White Knight''': Of course. White Knight out.
: '''Rex''': So, after that, Providence attacked Abysus to get the Master-Control Nanite. Guess you were next on their list.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': I see. And all this happened in the last year?
: '''Six''': You've missed a lot since you've been away, doctor.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Horrible. I could never work for a Providence like that. I have to say it's all very impressive. Providence has certainly done a lot in the last year.
: '''Caesar''': And with your help, doctor, we can do more.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Where's White Knight? I should tell him I've arrived.
: '''Black Knight''': I can answer that for you. It's good to have you back, doctor.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': What happened to White?
: '''Black Knight''': Just a routine change in command. Nothing to worry about. If you'll excuse me, gentlemen.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Tell me you have my money ready.
: '''Black Knight''': You get away you want when I get what I want... Not before.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Relax.
: '''Six''': I'm a professional, aren't I?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Six, see Meechum? I have some data I'd like to go over with him. Are you... okay?
: '''Six''': Rebecca, I have something important to tell you.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Okay. Well... Thanks for tell me.
: '''Six''': Rex, are you in here? I do not understand this show.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Am I interrupting?
: '''Six''': Not at all. What can I do for you?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Nothing important. I just wanted to say... earlier... that was nice. Unexpected but nice. 
: '''Six''': Earlier?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': In the lab?
: '''Six''': I have no idea what you're talking about.
: ''[Dr. Holiday scoffs]''
: '''Rex''': Six, I need to talk to you about Circe. Uh... Six? Earth to agent guy. You okay?
: '''Six''': I'm fine. I've just decided not to waste any more time on you, Rex.
: '''Rex''': Um... Is this because I accidentaly used your swords to slice a pizza?
: '''Six''': It's because you're weak. You don't have what it takes to complete the mission.
: '''Rex''': Ohh, I get it. This is one of your test, right?
: '''Six''': No test. Just me coming to my senses. You're not strong enough to survive what's coming. In the end, you're gonna let us all down.
: ''[Dr. Holiday crying]''
: '''Rex''': Doc? What's wrong?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': ''[Sobbing]'' I-It's nothing, Rex. I didn't want you to see me like this.
: '''Rex''': Well, what is it?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': ''[Sobbing]'' It's Six. I'm afraid of him.
: '''Rex''': What?! That's crazy talk.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': ''[Sobbing]'' Is it? You have to have seen it. He's violent, on edge. He's losing control.
: '''Rex''': Are we talking about the same Six?
: '''Dr. Holiday''': We don't even known him. He was a killer, Rex. The old Six might have changed, but how do we know this Six didn't come back... Wrong?
: ''[Dr. Meechum whistling]''
: '''Dr. Meechum''': I have a question. How do you plan to re-create the project without a bio-interface expert?
: '''Caesar''': Oh, but we do have one.
: '''Van Kleiss''': No! The string doesn't work. Gordian knot, tied up tight. Alexander cheated. Can't cheat. Eyes on your own paper! Peter? No! Can't be! Different time, different me.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Van Kleiss? You brought back that monster?
: '''Caesar''': Of course. He was the original interface programmer. Who better?
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Excuse me a moment. White, what the heck is going on?!
: '''White Knight''': Peter? Where are you?
: '''Dr. Meechum''': I'm at Providence. Where are you?
: '''White Knight''': Providence. But that's not-- I have to go. We have a problem.
: '''Rex''': You're darn right we have a problem, because this isn't Peter Meechum!
: ''[Dr. Meechum laughing maniacally]''
: '''Scarecrow''': Heya, Rex. Miss me?
: '''Rex''': Who are you? Where's Meechum?
: '''White Knight''': His name's John Scarecrow. He's an EVO, specialist in infiltration. Black Knight played us.
: '''Scarecrow''': You really don't remember me, Rex? I'll give you a hint. We used to share a stomping ground. We had a problem with a shapes hifter once.
: '''Rex''': You were in Hong Kong.
: '''Scarecrow''': Give the man a prize.
: ''[Scarecrow laughs]''
: '''Six''': I think he went that way.
: '''Rex''': Wait a minute.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: ''[Scarecrow laughs]''
: '''Rex''': I cannot believe I fell for that.
: '''Scarecrow''': Look at you. You're ridiculous. You think he'll come to his senses, realize his true feelings? Then what? You'll settle down. White picket fence. Little agent kids. You're fooling yourself. You're the worst of them... you know that?... Because you know better. You really think you can save the world? None of you can survive what's coming!
: '''Rex''': Prove it's really you. What's my favorite color?
: '''Six''': I have no idea.
: '''Rex''': It's you, all right.
: ''[Dr. Holiday screaming]''
: '''Dr. Holiday''': Put it away. I'm not the EVO.
: '''Six''': We heard you scream.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': That wasn't me.
: '''Six''': Let's all calm down. We can figure this out.
: '''Rex''': Why, Six? Because I'm weak? You don't think I can handle this?
: '''Six''': I never said that.
: '''Rex''': But you think it, right? I don't see you putting down your guns, doc.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': I know it's not me. I'm not sure about you two.
: ''[Scarecrow laughs]''
: '''Scarecrow''': So easy. I barely had to nudge you.
: '''Rex''': Whatever you're after, you're not getting away with it.
: '''Scarecrow''': Get away with it?! Re-e-e-x, I got what I needed in the first five minutes.
: '''Rex''': Then why? Why do all this?
: '''Scarecrow''': Simple. I wanted to do to you what you did to me.
: '''Rex''': I'm done with you!
: ''[Scarecrow groans]''
: '''Scarecrow''': The big hero. Why do you get to forget? It's not fair!
: '''Rex''': Whine, whine, whine. What... you didn't get enough crazy hugs as a kid?
: '''Scarecrow''': You think I'm the only one you hurt? Then tell me--
: '''Skwydd''': What about us? Why'd you betray me? 
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Circe:''' You promised to protect me, Rex. Where were you?
: '''Rex:''' Stop it!
: ''[Rex groans]''
: ''[Rex breathing heavily]''
: '''Caesar''': Face it, bro. It's why I left you. Mom and dad, too.
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Rex''': You're your own worst enemy.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': That's for Rex. That's for Providence. And that was for the kiss.
: '''White Knight''': Providence won this round. No question.
: '''Rex''': They have the real Meechum. Maybe more.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': There's no telling how much of our system Scarecrow uploaded.
: '''Six''': But we have to assume they know everything we do.
: ''[Scarecrow laughs evilly]''
: '''White Knight''': Black Knight is coming for us. It's just a matter of time.
: '''Dr. Holiday''': So? I mean, we knew that. Nothing's changed, right?
: '''Six''': Rex, this is what they wanted-- To turn us against each other.
: '''Rex''': Yeah, and look how easy it was. We thought we were a team, but we're not. We're vulnerable.
: '''Van Kleiss''': It's Heisenberg's uncertainty principle. Looking past Occam's Razor, we can clearly see to a quantum level. A quantum level is what I'm trying to achieve, because if I didn't do the quantum level, then I can understand what's happening.
: '''Caesar''': I know you don't like this, but it's not about us.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': Can you do it? Can you control him?
: '''Caesar''': Leave Van Kleiss to me.
: '''Dr. Meechum''': What about Black Knight? I don't like her, Salazar. Never did.
: '''Caesar''': Trust me, Peter-- When we're finished, the end will justify the means.

===Hermanos===
:'''Rex Salazar''': WH-O-O-O-OA! Unh! Ugh!
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Agent Six''': Be careful, Rex.
:'''Rex Salazar''': I'm touched by your concern, Six.
:'''Agent Six''': It's not for you. We don't have Providence to pick up the tab anymore. You break it, you buy it.
:''[Rex growls]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': I'm saving the day here. What are they gonna do--Sue me? Oh, come on! It was a rhetorical question! What was I supposed to do? The whole building was made of glass!
:'''Lawyer''': ''[Hispanic accent]'' Glass? What are you talking about?
:'''Rex Salazar''': I'm... not talking about anything. What are you talking about?
:'''Lawyer''': Mr. Salazar, I'm an associate at the stateside branch of the Argentinean firm Gomez and Gomez. And today, sir, is your lucky day!
:'''Rex Salazar''': What's this?
:'''Lawyer''': It's yours!
:'''Noah Nixon''': No away! This is your house?
:'''Rex Salazar''': I know! According to the lawyer guy, this rancho in Argentina's been in my family forever. And ever since my parents died in the event, those lawyers have been trying to track down the heir. And guess who that is.
:'''Noah Nixon''': You and your brother?
:'''Rex Salazar''': Oh, yeah, right. Him too.
:'''Caesar Salazar''': Not a good time, Rex.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Dude, it's never a good time, but you go to-- O...kay, so maybe this really isn't a good time, but this is important. I was being chased by a lawyer. No, I wasn't being sued this time. But you'll never guess what he--
:'''Caesar Salazar''': Is this about the rancho?
:'''Rex Salazar''': You know about it?
:'''Caesar Salazar''': Those lawyers have left me a dozen messages.
:'''Rex Salazar''': And you didn't tell me? Caesar, I never even knew we had this place! There might be photo albums, home movies-- I don't know-- maybe even an old teddy bear or something.
:'''Caesar Salazar''': You never had a teddy bear.
:'''Rex Salazar''': See, the fact that you know that and I don't-- that's why we need to go down there.
:'''Lawyer''': Clear!
:'''Caesar Salazar''': I can't, Rex. My work's already been interrupted once today. Although... Now that you mention the ranch, it does bring back some memories.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Really? Like what?
:'''Caesar Salazar''': There was an experiment I remember mom and dad running. If you could find the notes, it might save some time on the work I'm doing now.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Notes? Come on. Isn't family more important than-- Guess not.
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Why can't I have a normal brother? Know anything about cows? Thanks for coming with me. This is really a family thing, but my brother is, well-- My brother. 
:'''Noah Nixon''': Are you kidding? I'm psyched! I've been killing myself trying to find a birthday present for Claire. A vacation at my best friend's awesome ancestral estate? What other guy could offer her that?
:'''Rex Salazar''': Okay, but then why bring Annie?
:'''Annie''': Um, this just kind of broke off.
:''[Annie, Claire and Noah screaming]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': AAAAAAH!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': I sure hope this isn't included in Six's &quot;You break it, you buy it&quot; policy.
:'''Annie''': Sorry.
:'''Rex Salazar''': No problem. We're here.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Are... you sure this is the place?
:'''Noah Nixon''': What happened to it?
:'''Annie''': Hey, don't look at me. I just got there.
:''[Annie gasps]''
:'''Annie''': Okay, that was me.
:'''Rex Salazar''': I guess this must be my... family.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Looks like you-- But with a 'stache.
:'''Annie''': I like you with a 'stache.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Hey, there are chickens in here!
:'''Annie''': And llamas!
:'''Noah Nixon''': Chicken, llamas-- And a funny-looking bull.
:''[Chiquito snorts]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': I-I-I take it back! You're not funny-looking!
:'''Chiquito''': This place is Durango's!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Well, actually--
:'''Chuquito''': No fancy talk! Just go!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Ugh! Okay, number one, how is &quot;actually&quot; fancy talk! Number two, I don't know who Durango is, but this farm isn't his. And number three--
:''[Chiquito grunts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Ugh! Ugh! All right, there's no misunderstanding the international language of getting punched in the face. So read my fist-- Get out of my house!
:'''Chiquito''': Durango will not be happy!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Okay, don't know who that guy was, but problem solved.
:'''Noah Nixon''': Uh, you think? Aah!
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Senior Durango''': Calmate, Chiquito. You are my brother. I would not do anything to hurt mi hermano. Unless you force me to. I cannot lose that tract of land. Without its right of way, I will lose my claim on the rest of the county. But never mind. They will learn-- When you mess with the bull, you get the horns.
:'''Rex Salazar''': OHHH! Ugh!
:'''Noah Nixon''': A chicken just tried to poop on my shoe!
:'''Rex Salazar''': I think I can top you there.
:'''Noah Nixon''': No offense, but when I asked Claire to come here, this wasn't what I was hoping for.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Well, me either. I mean, I was thinking I'd find-- I don't know what. But everything in this place has been smashed or stolen. Maybe this whole family thing isn't for me.
:''[Noah gasps]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': That's the one!
:'''Claire Bowman''': Please, Noah. It just needed a little help laying an egg.
:'''Rex Salazar''': ''[Chuckling]'' What, did you grow up on a farm in Kansas?
:'''Claire Bowman''': An apartment in Chicago-- Which is where I learned to download videos onto my phone.
:'''Telephone Voice''': When caring for an egg bearing hen, remember to--
:'''Muchado''': Hola? Quien esta aquí?
:'''Rex Salazar''': Uh... hello?
:'''Muchado''': So, you are the Americans? I am Señor Muchado-- The juez.
:'''Claire Bowman''': That's like a judge?
:'''Muchado''': Sí. For all intents and purposes, I am the law in this county-- Which is why I have come here with him.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Good, because I definitely want to press charges.
:'''Muchado''': You misunderstand. I am here because of the trouble you caused for Chiquito.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Chiquito?
:''[Rex chuckles]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Your mom must have some sense of humor to name you &quot;Tiny&quot;.
:''[Chiquito growls]''
:'''Muchado''': Chiquito's brother is Señor Durango. He controls most of the land in this county, including this hacienda. At Señor Durango's request, I have prepared a legal order compelling you to vacate.
:'''Claire Bowman''': But this is Rex's farm.
:'''Annie''': Yeah, he's got a deed and everything.
:'''Muchado''': This might have some bearing-- If you were a Salazar.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Well, we're in luck. I am.
:'''Annie''': Maybe this will help.
:'''Muchado''': You may be a Salazar, but by our law, this land has been deemed abandoned, and Señor Durango has claimed it.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Sorry. Been sort of busy saving the world and stuff. But I'm here now, so consider his claim unclaimed, then reclaimed by me.
:'''Muchado''': It is not so simple. You would have to demonstrate you are actively maintaining the ranch. That means shearing and feeding the animals, bringing your bulls to market--
:'''Rex Salazar''': To market? What, like a... cattle drive?
:'''Claire Bowman''': No problem. We can totally figure out how to do that.
:'''Muchado''': A ranch this size requires at least a dozen hired men.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Okay, just... uh...
:'''Muchado''': No one within 100 kilometers will help you cross Señor Durango. If you do this, you will do it alone. And you will fail.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Well, that guy was kind of a jerk.
:'''Annie''': Yeah. So, let's get to work.
:'''Noah Nixon''': How? Everything here is broken.
:'''Annie''': Uh, have you seen my house?
:'''Rex Salazar''': You guys don't have to do this.
:'''Claire Bowman''': What kind of friend would walk away now?
:'''Noah Nixon''': Uh... yeah! No way you could stop me from helping take care of these totally not-gross animals. 
:'''Rex Salazar''': Really?
:'''Noah Nixon''': Well, I'm smiling like that's what I mean, aren't?
:''[Noah exhales deeply]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': I can do this! I can't do this. Until I've done my milking warm-up.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Ugh. Hold this.
:'''Telephone Voice''': With you head resting on her flank, gently grasp the udder with the palm of your hand.
:'''Noah Nixon''': AAH!
:''[Claire giggles]''
:'''Claire Bowman''': I think she likes you.
:'''Noah Nixon''': Ugh!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': This is your home. Get in your home!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Whoa! AAAH! AAH! Ugh! This is hopeless! This farm only has one bull, and I can't even get it into the barn. And this... better just be mud.
:'''Annie''': Hang on! I'll help you!
:''[Annie gasps]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': No! Don't!
:'''Noah Nixon''': Are you guys okay?
:'''Claire Bowman''': What is it? A storm cellar?
:'''Noah Nixon''': Looks like some kind of lab.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Figures. My mom and dad were Caesar's parents, too. Of course they'd find a way to take work home with them. Probably where those notes Caesar wanted are. Might as well grab them before the judge kicks us out.
:'''Claire Bowman''': What's he talking about? I think we're doing a pretty good job taking care of the--
:'''Annie''': Uh, guys--
:''[Claire grunts]''
:'''Claire Bowman''': Wait-- Donkeys eat hay, don't they? Maybe we can use it to lure them back into the barn.
:'''Annie''': I got it! Ugh!
:''[Annie gasps]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': Well, on the plus side, at least we now know for sure that donkeys do eat hay.
:''[On videotape of the Salazar family]''
:'''Rafael Salazar''': One day, these things are going to change the world, and you'll be there to see it.
:'''Violetta Salazar''': ''[Chuckling]'' Caesar, please, mi hijo. Stop working for a minute and hold the camera.
:'''Young Caesar Salazar''': Okay! Okay!
:''[Claire sniffs]''
:'''Claire Bowman''': What's that smell?
:'''Noah Nixon''': Which one? Everything here smells.
:'''Claire Bowman''': No, it smells like... smoke!
:'''Annie''': Rex! The straw caught on fire, and it exploded!
:''[Chiquito growls]''
:'''Chiquito''': Hermano! No! Oomph!
:'''Senior Durango''': What were you thinking? I told you to smoke them out, not burn the land! This is my land! If you weren't my brother--
:''[Chiquito growls]''
:'''Senior Durango''': But you are. Come here.
:'''Rex Salazar''': So, you must be the brother. Hope I'm not interrupting some kind of weird tender moment.
:'''Senior Durango''': Soy Durango. And I hope there is still a chance we can reach a resonable agreement.
:'''Claire Bowman''': So, then you'll let Rex keep the farm? We played by the rules.
:'''Senior Durango''': Around here, I make the rules.
:'''Annie''': But the judge said--
:'''Senior Durango''': The judge works for me. Now, please, I'm giving you one last chance to leave.
:'''Noah Nixon''': Okay, sure! Oh, wait-- That's right. Your fire blew up what was left of our plane!
:'''Rex Salazar''': Uh, let me handle the trash-talking with the 20-foot-tall monster EVO, okay? Leave them out of this! They shouldn't even be here! It should have been my brother!
:'''Senior Durango''':  That is why you will lose your farm. Without family, a man is nothing. After all, what is this land to them?
:'''Rex Salazar''': I don't even know what this place is to me. I came here hoping to find out more about who my family is.
:''[Rex start looking at Noah, Claire and Annie, and smile to them]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': And I did. So, you're going to stop threatening them-- And me-- And get off my land.
:''[Durango snarls]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Okay. Here's the plan-- Stay behind me! Whoa! Ugh!
:'''Noah Nixon''': Well, there goes that plan.
:'''Senior Durango''': Hurt them. You can do that, can't you?
:'''Claire Bowman''': W-what do we do now?!
:'''Annie''': The only one of us with powers just got kicked to the curb.
:'''Noah Nixon''': That depends on what you mean by &quot;powers&quot;.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:''[Rex muffled grunting]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Not a good time, Caesar.
:'''Caesar Salazar''': I just wanted to tell you-- Forget about those notes. I realized that's not what's important about you going down there.
:''[Durango snarls]''
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Wow, Caesar. I can't believe you came around.
:'''Caesar Salazar''': I just realized-- The really important thing is, if you happen to find a termo-chronometer I remember having down there, it would save me from ordering one.
:''[Chiquito snarls]''
:''[Chiquito growls]''
:''[Chiquito snarls, roars]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': Ugh!
:''[Chiquito snorts]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': This morning, I almost had to touch a cow's underparts. You think you can do me worse than that? Bring it.
:''[Chiquito snarls]''
:''[Chiquito roars]''
:'''Annie''': Ugh! I didn't mean for that to happen.
:'''Claire Bowman''': We did.
:'''Rex Salazar''': AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Ugh! AAAAAAAAAAARGH!
:'''Senior Durango''': OOMPH!
:''[Durango lows]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': WH-O-O-O-O-O-O O-OA!
:''[Durango lows]''
:''[Durango snorts]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': AAAAAAAAH!
:''[Durango growls]''
:''[Durango growls]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': Trust me-- My brother's let me down way worse. But what am I gonna do? He's my brother.
:'''Senior Durango''': It is over.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Nice ego there, but I've been hit a lot harder.
:''[Durango spits]''
:'''Senior Durango''': Those bells signal the market is ending soon. I can see you have yet to herd you cattle there.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Oh, come on! The one cattle I've got doesn't even move!
:'''Senior Durango''': If you do not have your cattle to market before it ends, you will have failed to fulfill your deed, and this land will be mine.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Then I guess I don't have any time to waste talking about it.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Come on. Come here.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Forget it. I got this.
:'''Claire Bowman''': WHOO-HOO! Yes! Go, Rex!
:''[Rex grunting]''
:'''Claire Bowman''': Where's Durango?
:'''Rex Salazar''': Oww! Come on! You don't move the whole time, and you can't stay still?
:''[Durango grunting]''
:'''Noah Nixon''': What is this, a western? You're actually trying to stop him with a rockslide?
:'''Senior Durango''': You? Here? How is that even possible?
:'''Telephone Voice''': Donkeys can be ridden surprinsingly fast if you--
:'''Noah Nixon''': Come on! Just give up! The farm belong to Rex. And I really want to get off this thing.
:'''Senior Durango''': You think I'm afraid of you ''[Scoffs]'' boy?
:'''Claire Bowman''': Oh, it's not the boy you should be afraid of.
:'''Annie''': Oops.
:''[Durango grunting]''
:'''Senior Durango''': Ugh!
:''[Rex panting]''
:'''Rex Salazar''': We sheared the llamas, we milked the cows, I got the bull to town. We did everything in the deed.
:'''Muchado''': Sí, sí. But more important, you faced Durango and won! Once the other ranchers hear of this, they won't be afraid. You have broken Durango's hold on our lands.
:'''Rex Salazar''': Wait-- You're... happy about that?
:'''Muchado''': Of course. I told you exactly what you had to do to legally gain control of the land, didn't I?
:'''Rex Salazar''': Huh. I guess you did.
:'''Claire Bowman''': Wow! Can you believe how you perfect this all worked out?
:'''Noah Nixon''': Yeah, uh, so, maybe we should get out of here before we wear out our welcome.
:'''Rex Salazar''': There's just one thing I want to do first.

===The Rescue===
:''Note'': Rex goes alone to rescue his girlfriend Circe from the clutches of Black Knight. but it turns out she has been waiting for him.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;

===Alone Together===
:''Note'': Finally together at last, Rex and Circe reminiscence about their good and hard times together ans their romance begins to grow.
===Retribution===
===Temporary Insanity===

===Crime and Punishment===
:''Note:'' His false insanity revealed, Van Kleiss abducts Circe with the intent of punishing her for betraying him, due to her enduring love for Rex.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Now, Circe, you shall learn the ultimate price of betraying me.
:'''Rex:''' ''Leave her alone!!''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Oh, Rex. For young love. One of your greatest weaknesses. After I finish off your beloved, you will no longer be a hindrance to me. 
:'''Rex''' (''enraged'')''':''' I ''said''...LEAVE HER ALONE!!!
&lt;hr width80%&gt;

===Shadowed Past===

===Separation Anxiety===
===Brotherly Love===

===Rocky My World===
:'''Beverly:''' Oh, this is so awesome! We're seeing the Trendbenders live!
:'''Rex:''' Well, maybe not see them, but we'll totally hear them. Attention! The Trendbenders will be arriving through the back of the club.
:'''Beverly:''' Slick trick! Yes, Rebecca. I know! Only drink the bottled water. No, we're not that close to the stage. Ugh! I know that's where they mosh-pit. Don't worry! Bye!
:'''Rex:''' Your sister is acting like your mother. I wouldn't put up with it. Doc?! I'm right next to her! Yes, we've got earplugs. Only bottled water-- I know! Yes, you'll pick us up at 11:00. Okay! Bye!
:'''Sly:''' ''[singing]'' I met a guy who has looking for a lucky break. I met a guy mad he wouldn't make a mistake. No loser here the weight would be upon his face. This ain't no lucky break it's just another day.
:'''Beverly:''' Hey!
:'''Rex:''' There's something wrong with that guy.
:'''Beverly:''' Yeah! It's called lack of social skills.
:'''Sebastian:''' We have to talk! You got to listen to me!
:'''Rex:''' I think they're a little too busy for a chat right now.
:'''Sebastian:''' It's me! Your first fan!
:'''Rex:''' Come on, dude. Can't you just watch the show, like everyone else?
:'''Sly:''' ''[singing]'' You won't bring me down. Yeah-yeah-yeah. You won't bring me down.
:'''Sebastian:''' I'm not just everyone else.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Sebastian:''' You want to rethink trying to stop me?
:'''Beverly:''' Whoa! Geek in triplicate!
:'''Rex:''' More like EVO geek.
:'''Sebastian:''' I bet you're not even a real fan!
:'''Rex:''' Hey, I know their music!
:'''Sebastian:''' Yeah? What album is &quot;Bitten on the Wind&quot; from?
:'''Beverly:''' Uh, their first album.
:'''Sebastian:''' Wrong! Their third! Poser!
:'''Sly:''' Here's one from our first album-- &quot;Bitten on the Wind.&quot;
:'''Beverly:''' Told ya! Their first album! Who's the poser now?
:'''Sebastian:''' But it is their third. They keep denying their first two albums exist!
:'''Rex:''' Huh?
:''[Rex bones cracking]''
:'''Rex:''' Shouldn't you be home, making sure your mom isn't snooping around your basement? Ouch! All right, I've had enough.
:'''Sebastian:''' I know you. You're that guy from Providence that beats up on EVOs.
:'''Rex:''' And I'm guessing you're not one of my fans.
:'''Sebastian:''' This isn't over! They still need me to show them the way back. I'll make them listen to me.. No matter what! Ugh!
:'''Man:''' No re-entry without a hand stamp.
:'''Rex:''' Uh, but--
:'''JoJo:''' It's okay. He's with me. I'm JoJo, the band's manager.
:'''Beverly:''' Oh!
:'''JoJo:''' Sly Tyler, vocals, six stringer. Burrito Beau on the big bottom, and Leon Adler on the skins.
:'''Beau:''' Bass.
:'''Leon:''' Drums.
:'''Beverly:''' They're even cutter up close!
:'''JoJo:''' But Sebastian isn't. And now that fruitcake fan has become a major menace.
:'''Rex:''' You know who that guy is?
:'''Sly:''' Yeah, he's one of our first fans from way back.
:'''Leon:''' But he didn't like our change in music direction.
:'''Beau:''' Change, like in popular.
:'''Sly:''' So he started sending us nasty e-mails and slagging us on the fan sites.
:'''JoJo:''' But now he's turned violent, and it turns out he's-- H-he's--
:'''Rex:''' An EVO that can multiply himself.
:'''JoJo:''' We can't handle that kind of threat, but you can.
:'''Beverly:''' Is this a job offer?
:'''JoJo:''' As head of security for the rest of the tour.
:'''Rex:''' Huh, I don't know. Putting up with groupies, great music, catering, the Rock'n'roll lifestyle-- Oh, right, like I'm not totally in for this!
:'''Beverly:''' And I'm your deputy, sheriff.
:'''Sly:''' Absolutely.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Absolutely not.
:'''Rex:''' They've got an EVO threat.
:''[Dr. Holiday sighs]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Fine, Rex. Beverly? And don't forget to use earplugs.
:'''Rex:''' Private jet to the next gig? Airline-- First class? Coach?
:'''JoJo:''' Of the road kind.
:'''Rex:''' Traveling the open road, bringing music to the people. Where to next?
:'''Beau:''' Eugene, Oregon. ''[Unenthusiastically]'' WHOO-HOO!
:'''Rex:''' Ow!
:'''Leon:''' Bad seat. Got a lot of them.
:''[Beau farts]''
:''[Rex sniffs]''
:'''Leon and Rex:''' Oh!
:''[Leon coughs]''
:'''Leon:''' Isn't the ozone layer depleted enough, Beau?
:'''Rex:''' Want to hit the streets and check out the local scene?
:'''Sly:''' Seriously, man? It's just another town.
:'''Beau:''' Been there. Seen them all.
:'''TV Announcer:''' He's currently under 3, 2 behind the leader. This is a very tricky--
:'''Rex:''' Oh, let's throw this in the pool!
:'''Leon:''' Hey, I'm watching something, dude!
:'''Rex:''' How about a food fight?
:'''Sly:''' Sorry, man. Not feeling it.
:'''Rex:''' This isn't feeling very Rock'n'Roll.
:'''JoJo:''' Rex, we hired you to consult on security, not rock-tour clichés.
:'''Sebastian:''' Room service.
:'''JoJo:''' Again? You guys, this is costing too much.
:'''Sly:''' But we didn't order anything else.
:'''Sebastian:''' That's okay. This is on the house!
:''[Sebastian grunts]''
:''[JoJo gasps]''
:'''Rex:''' Look out! He's got... Paperwork?
:'''Sebastian:''' I've got notes and visuals on where you've gone commercial and how you can get back to your roots! He's with the band now? He's not even a real fan! You see? You've got to come with me. You need my help!
:'''Rex:''' They're not going anywhere, but you are!
:'''Sebastian:''' My copies don't feel pain.
:'''Rex:''' But you do!
:'''Girl:''' Whoa! You must really be a big fan!
:'''Sebastian:''' Only of their early stuff.
:'''Girl:''' Eww! Their early stuff is weak.
:'''Teen girl:''' But their new songs are awesome!
:''[Girls giggling]''
:''[Sebastian growls]''
:''[Girls screaming]''
:'''Rex:''' Excuse me. I'm with the band.
:'''Teen girl:''' But you missed your ride.
:'''Rex:''' That's okay. I've got my own.
:'''Man:''' Rock bands! Never again!
:'''Sebastian:''' I've got to take you away from this sellout existence, where you deny your first two albums even exist.
:'''Sly:''' B-but those albums weren't any good. That's why we only had a few fans, like you.
:'''Rex:''' If there's only three of them, then who's driving the car?
:'''Sebastian:''' Aah!
:'''Rex:''' Did he... Ah! Rent that car from the circus? Time to cut this act short.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Sebastian:''' Oh, man. I went to my first Trendbenders show in that car.
:'''Rex:''' Maybe I can't turn off your obsession, but I can shut down your nanites.
:'''Beau:''' That clone-boy?
:'''Rex:''' I don't think he's going to be a problem now.
:'''JoJo:''' We can still use you on the tour. What did you say?
:'''Rex:''' Yes!
:'''Sly:''' Good man! ''[singing]'' You see the light, and it's oh, so bright, a million times more than before, now we'll show you the door, some starts fade, and some starts shine, the bright ones stand the test of time, the others burn out and sing, &quot;yeah, we almost made it&quot;, &quot;yeah, but we're overrated&quot;, kill your radio, you live a life for all to see, sometimes it's right, sometimes obscene, now you're the enemy, it's one for all and all for me, unlocking doors and misery, the others burn out and sing, &quot;yeah, we almost made it&quot;, &quot;yeah, but we're overrated&quot;, out of time, kill your radio, &quot;yeah, we almost made it&quot;, &quot;yeah, but we're overrated&quot;, out of time, kill your radio, out of time, kill your radio, out of time, kill your radio, out of time, kill your radio, it isn't all, that it's cracked up to be, I never thought it'd be so easy, I wouldn't have it any other way, you see the light, and it's oh, so bright, a million times more than before, now we'll show you the door, some starts fade, and some starts shine, the bright ones stand the test of time, the others burn out and sing, &quot;yeah, we almost made it&quot;, &quot;yeah, but we're overrated&quot;, out of time, kill your radio, &quot;yeah, we almost made it&quot;, &quot;yeah, but we're overrated&quot;, out of time, kill your radio, &quot;yeah&quot;.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Sly:''' At least we got a day off before the next gig.
:'''JoJo:''' Guys, a club owner in fleeceburg just offered us amazing money. I booked it.
:'''Rex:''' For when?
:'''JoJo:''' We're already running late.
:'''Sly:''' They're paying money for us to play in this dump?
:'''JoJo:''' Big money. Come on. You're on in ten minutes.
:'''Rex:''' I'm guessing ticket sales are a little slow.
:'''Leon:''' Are we breaking up?
:'''Beau:''' This dive seems awfully familiar.
:'''Sebastian:''' It should.
:'''Rex:''' That voice seems awfully familiar!
:'''Teens:''' Dude! Nobody move! What's going on? Who's touching me? What is this? Excuse me. What is going on?
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Sebastian:''' I built an exact replica of the first club you played in.
:'''Beau:''' Hey, that's one of my puke stains. Fruitcake knows his details.
:'''Rex:''' But I cured you.
:'''Sebastian:''' Hmm... That was a copy, not the original.
:'''Sly:''' Whatever. When's this gonna end, fan-boy?
:'''Sebastian:''' It ends tonight. Check the floor at your feet.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Sebastian:''' I've given up trying to get you back to your roots. So now you'll play what I want to hear for the next hour. And then your career ends with a bang. :'''Sly:''' On behalf of the band, I'd like to thank our manager, JoJo, for booking this totally insane gig!
:''[JoJo laughs nervously]''
:'''Sebastian:''' The sound of cold, hard cash is the only music sellouts like you listen to anymore.
:'''Rex:''' They're not sellouts. They just got more popular than you wanted.
:'''Sebastian:''' You try anything, and I'll end their last gig prematurely. You're only alive because I want you to see what the Trendbenders used to be like. For the next hour give me the early stuff, when you were cool.
:'''Sly:''' Why bother? You're gonna nuke us, anyway.
:'''Sebastian:''' Because if you don't play, this happens!
:'''Sly:''' Aah!
:'''Leon, Sly and Beau:''' No more!
:'''Sly:''' Okay, dude, what's the first number?
:'''Sebastian:''' &quot;Crawling undertow&quot;!
:'''Sly:''' Well, how does it feel?
:'''Sebastian:''' First album, seventh song. Fifth song on the Japanese import.
:'''Sly:''' To get that weight back on our shoulders--
:'''Sebastian:''' You're giving it a beat that wasn't in the original, man! Not even in the remix from the box set. Play it right this time! I'm missing the concert because of you!
:'''Rex:''' Stinks to be you. Got to cure the real Sebastian. But which one is the mother ship?
:'''Sebastian:''' You can't even play your old songs like you used to. Total disappointment. Let's end this bummer concert.
:'''Sly:''' But we still have over a half-hour left!
:'''Sebastian:''' Last song, no encore.
:'''Rex:''' Tell me who's the original, or I'll turn you into dessert topping!
:'''Sebastian:''' You don't scare me. I don't feel pain.
:'''Rex:''' But the real Sebastian does. Sly! Maximum feedback! Now! Thanks, Doc.
:'''Sebastian''': AAAHHHH!
:'''Rex:''' How do you like their new hit, Sebastian Prime? Here's another new groove you're not going to like.
:'''Sebastian:''' Aah!
:'''Rex:''' Congrats. You're back to being a solo act.
:'''Sebastian:''' You've got to listen to me!
:''[Sebastian yelling]''
:'''Rex:''' Kidnapping, assault and battery, construction without a permit-- that should keep him away for years.
:'''JoJo:''' Have to say it, guys, but we've got a gig in toledo to get to. Security?
:'''Rex:''' Not anymore. Sebastian's done, and so am I.
:'''Sly:''' Dude, I thought you wanted the rock'n'roll lifestyle.
:'''Rex:''' I'm not tough enough for it. I need to get back to something easier, like city-smashing EVOs and conspiracies to take over the world.
:'''Beau:''' Don't know what your missing.
:'''Rex:''' I think do. But I don't miss this. Yes, doc? Don't need my earplugs anymore. I quit. Will you let me tell you? No, the EVO threat wasn't just an excuse. Well, I'm coming back! Will you let-- Doc!

===Lost and Found===

===My Brother's Keeper===

===Target: the Consortium===
: '''Jungle Cat:''' You are...?
: '''Rex:''' Rex. Rex Salazar. What are you?
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Lost... and found.
: '''Rex:''' HUNH! AAAAAAAAH! AAAAAAAH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
: ''[Rex gasps deeply]''
: '''Rex:''' Whoa. That was a total zero on the fun meter.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Learning how to communicate with the nanite world isn't about fun. Did you get anywhere at all?
: '''Rex:''' Don't know. I connected with a Master Control Nanite for a second, and then I lost it. But I also got, like, this feeling that something's about to happen in the nanite world. Something... big.
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' Argh! This is Rylander's speciality, not mine. There's no way I can cover for him.
: '''Caesar:''' Not to worry, Dr. Meechum. You won't have to any longer. Dr. Rylander will take over from here.
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' Oh, really, Caesar? From his current location of beyond the grave?
: '''Rylander:''' Actually, Peter, I was never completely dead-- just spread a little thin-- ''[chuckling]'' Moleculary speaking. Caesar's been working on putting me back together.
: '''Black Knight:''' All of them together-- At last. Contact the Consortium. We now have something to show them. Something big.
: '''White Knight:''' Even having two of the Master-Control Nanites doesn't change the vital importance of finding the other three. But the latest intel I've received could give us a way to neutralize the group obsessed with these machines.
: '''Six:''' The Consortium.
: '''Rex:''' Aren't those the money guys that bankrolled the Nanite Project in Providence?
: '''White Knight:''' The same. Formerly made-up of six members, but now five-- Reddick, made his wealth in real estate and construction. Vostock, black market finance and KGB... Zanubian, arms dealing and shipping. Roswell, oil and minerals. Anthony Haden-Scott, worldwide media.
: ''[Rex munches]''
: '''Rex:''' Should we be writing this down for the pop quiz later?
: '''White Knight:''' You may be facing them soon because of the efforts of our stealthiest agent.
: '''Rex:''' Mm! Thank you! I think.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' He's not talking about you.
: '''Rex:''' Hey! It's Evo-cat guy! Uh... sorry-- What's your name? O...kay, cat with no collar, what's in the sack? Bunch of canaries? Well, that's... something.
: '''White Knight:''' Our associate has been tracking the Consortium with a little help from a former member.
: '''Rex:''' I remember him! He's the one Rylander got revenge on with an EVO love letter.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' That he never recovered from. But he's still full of useful knowledge about the other members.
: '''Rex:''' As long as you have a towel handy for the answers.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' The Consortium has financed a new facility for nanite research. All of them will be at that location within the next six hours.
: '''Six:''' And so will we.
: '''White Knight:''' A rare opportunity like this can't be missed. You three will capture the Consortium and bring them to a secure location. Understood?
: '''Rex:''' Purrfectly.
: '''Black Knight:''' Gentlemen, I wanted you here today to--
: '''Reddick:''' &quot;Wanted?&quot; Sounds like a command.
: '''Vostok:''' ''[Russian accent]'' You get to ask, not order.
: '''Black Knight:''' I'm sorry. Let me restate. I asked you here because I can now present some major developments in your quest. I finished construction on the nanite reactor and reassembled against all odds the original science team to run it. Doctors Meechum, systems expert. Salazar, artificial intelligence. Rylander, microengineering. And Van Kleiss, biomechanical integration.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Nanite's recorder locked in. Hologram Rylander saves money on meals. Glow, glow, glow, yipper.
: ''[Van Kleiss smooches]''
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' A human flashlight and a brain-fried babbler. This is what I'm supposed to work with.
: '''Vostok:''' Looks like your geniuses have some issues.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' ''[British accent]'' I seem to recall there were two other Salazars on the team.
: '''Black Knight:''' They're dead-- And just as well. Considering their actions are responsible for our setbacks, I highly doubt they would have cooperated.
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: '''Black Pawns:''' Ohh!
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' Black Pawns got to talk to their costume designer. Way too stuffy.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Be quiet.
: '''Six:''' Our target?
: '''Roswell:''' ''[Southern accent]'' Little lady, I'm hoping you didn't get me out here just to watch some lab jockeys do their homework.
: '''Vostok:''' I know I've got better things to do.
: '''Black Knight:''' Aside from the all-important reassembly of the science team and activation of the nanite reactor, I do have another development to show you.
: '''Roswell:''' Yeah? What else you got?
: '''Black Knight:''' An acquisition.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Lost... and found.
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Jungle Cat:''' What's wrong with you?
: '''Rex:''' Forget the Consortium! I know where we can find a Master-Control Nanite.
: '''Six:''' Where?
: '''Rex''': Here.
: '''Six:''' We're doing both. You two get the nanite, I'll get the Consortium.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' On of the five? That's all?
: '''Reddick:''' You know we need all of the Master-Control Nanites to do us any good.
: '''Vostok:''' What about the two you lost? And the other two still out there?
: '''Black Knight:''' We'll have the other four in due time. Take this back to the vault. But remember that each one has its own useful powers. : '''Roswell:''' Not enough to drag me all the way out there, little lady.
: '''Black Knight:''' &quot;Black Knight&quot;.
: '''Black Pawns:''' You're not one of us.
: '''Six:''' Stay clear of the Pawns. They're not buying our cover. Repeat-- Stay clear of the Pawns.
: '''Rex:''' Steel door. A vault!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Jungle Cat:''' That was close.
: '''Rex:''' Got it. Have to be as stealthy as you from now on.
: ''[Jungle Catsnarls]''
: ''[Jungle Cat snarling]''
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Van Kleiss!
: ''[Jungle Cat muffled grunting]''
: '''Rex:''' Way not to be stealthy. Sorry, cat guy. I know you want payback for him turning you into stone and all, but the nanite is more important.
: '''Black Pawns:''' Security alert. Intruder.
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: '''Jungle Cat:''' You find the nanite. I'll be a diversion.
&lt;hr width80%&gt;
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' She has shown us some progress. That one nanite is significant in itself.
: '''Reddick:''' It's all five or nothing. Or are you thinking of working a separate deal with the one?
: '''Vostok:''' Can we please not talk like this while those two are in the room?
: '''Roswell:''' Yeah, Xanubian, put a sock in all your yammerin'.
: '''Black Pawns:''' Another intruder at security zone three. It's Agent Six.
: '''Rex:''' Gotcha.
: '''Black Pawns:''' Unh! Aah!
: '''Rex:''' I'll take that. Six! I've got the nanite!
: '''Six:''' Meet your outside.
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: '''Rex:''' I've got it! Let's scat, cat!
: '''Black Knight:''' If he's here-- So is Rex. Vault security, come in.
: '''Reddick:''' Is there a problem?
: '''Black Knight:''' A minor security issue. I'm taking care of it.
: '''Vostok:''' ''[Russian accent]'' You better, little lady.
: '''Rex:''' Well, mission half accomplished.
: '''Six:''' This should complete it.
: '''Rex:''' You planted a bomb?!
: '''Six:''' Plan &quot;B&quot;.
: '''Rex:''' The cat! He's still inside! No! We've got to go back for the cat! He's on his own mission. Van Kleiss is there.
: '''Six:''' Understood.
: '''Black Pawns:''' Black Knight, shouldn't we evacuate?
: '''Black Knight:''' The security threat has been removed. Among other things. Track them, find them.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Interlace template, instal copper buffers, hold the mayo, set core temp, heat cold fries.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Remember me?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Someone let the cat in.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' You cast me aside as if I was garbage. Turned me to stone. Drained me of life-- Almost. Now it's your turn to suffer.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Had a kitty once. Not you. Bubbles liked catnip and parsnips. Chapped lips. Hip, hip, hooray!
: ''[Jungle Cat growls]''
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' If you're here to clean up, ask for directions, not Dr. Screwloose.
: '''Rex:''' Ugh! Meechum. Bro. He's here to put Van Kleiss out of the world's misery. Give me a reason why he shouldn't.
: ''[Jungle Cat growls]''
: '''Rylander:''' Because the world needs him right now, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' Dr. Rylander! How did you--
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Rex:''' ''[to Caesar]'' You got it to work.
: '''Rylander:''' I've looked better, I'll admit, but I'm still very much alive. And so happy to see you again.
: '''Rex:''' If you could bring him back--
: '''Caesar:''' Sorry, Rex. It won't work for mom and dad.
: '''Rex:''' So, you've come back-- But you're working for them!
: '''Rylander:''' It seems crazy, I know, but look at our progress-- The nanite reactor is almost operational!
: '''Rex:''' Not if I destroy it.
: '''Black Knight:''' Surround them.
: '''Caesar:''' Trust me, hermano, We're doing the right thing.
: '''Rex:''' You keep saying that, but I don't believe it anymore!
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Bubbles, I'm sorry. Here, kitty, kitty. Left you out in the rain, rain go away--
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: ''[Jungle Cat snarling]''
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Ugh! Easy on the hot sauce, Peter, Peter pumpkin two seater.
: '''Rylander:''' ''[to Caesar]'' Tell him, Caesar!
: '''Rex:''' Tell me what?
: '''Six:''' Revenge time is up.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: ''[Jungle Cat roars]''
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' Aah! Careful! Our work! Ugh! Take it outside!
: '''Rex:''' Ugh!
: ''[Rex grunting]''
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Rex. Rex Salazar.
: '''Rex:''' I can't talk now! Ugh!
: '''Black Knight:''' Thank you.
: '''Rex:''' You're so not welcome.
: '''Black Knight:''' You should have left when you had the chance.
: ''[Black Knight grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' You guys have such a great cafeteria.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Had to come back for more.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Aah! Unh!
: '''Six:''' Unh!
: ''[Black Knight grunting]''
: '''Black Knight:''' Unh!
: '''Six:''' UNNNNNNNNH!
: '''Black Knight:''' Ugh!
: ''[Jungle Cat snarls]''
: '''Rex:''' Let's say adiós.
: '''Six:''' There's still plan &quot;B&quot;.
: '''Rex:''' We're not assassins.
: '''Six:''' You're not. This might be our one chance.
: '''Rex:''' To be like them? Then what makes us different?
: '''Six:''' Go. I'm right behind you.
: '''Roswell:''' You brought us into an ambush! Right behind you, Mr. Chatterbox.
: '''Vostok:''' You are cowards.
: '''Reddick:''' Graveyards are full of dummies that thought they were though.
: '''Vostok:''' Black Knight, we have a lot to discuss about your future.
: '''Black Knight:''' By all means, let's talk.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Where's Six?
: '''Rex:''' He said he was right behind us.
: '''Six:''' I am. The Consortium still has to be dealt with.
: '''Rex:''' We now have three Master Control Nanites. I'd say the Consortium has to deal with us.
: '''Six:''' Understood.
: '''Jungle Cat:''' Purrfectly.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' I'm shocked. What happened?
: '''Black Knight:''' It seems Vostok had an unfortunate run-in with our intruders as he was leaving. But, there's good news. The reactor is gone. Soon we will have all the nanites we need.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' &quot;We&quot;?
: '''Black Knight:''' I think it's time we walked about my promotion.

===Convergence===
===Enter the Nanite World===

===Enemies Mine===
: '''Valve:''' Battle is to be waged between your courage and my power. You lose.
: '''Gatlocke:''' Valve, my friend. Lovely day for a riot, don't you think?
: '''Valve:''' What do you want, Gatlocke?
: '''Gatlocke:''' I want lots of things-- A doomsday weapon, my own private island, for my mom to stop calling me to fix her computer. But what I really want is to give you a message. It's time. I suppose I'll make the introductions.
: '''Valve:''' A biker needs no introduction. And everyone knows Hunter Cain.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Everything is going according to plan. We get one more thing. Then we get wrecked.
: '''Rex:''' Sorry we're late.
: '''Bobo:''' We're not late. We're fashionably early.
: '''Providence Agent:''' I was starting to think I was on my own. I've been calling for help, but  Providence hasn't answered.
: '''Six:''' What set this off?
: '''Providence Agent:''' No idea. One moment everything was fine. The next moment, complete chaos.
: '''Rex:''' I'm heading in. I'll lock up when I'm done. Oh, don't bother getting up. I'm just gonna knock you back down again.
: '''Bobo:''' Back in your cages, you filthy animals!
: '''Rex:''' Huh? What? You? It's a who's-who of old EVOs. Whew! Really not in the mood for this. You're kidding me. You?!
: '''Gatlocke:''' Three men, one objective, no rules. Oh, this is exciting, isn't it? Or is it just me?
: '''Valve:''' The others are saying that Rex is here. Rex will get his when we're ready.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Watch yourselves. This one's unpredictable. We know what you want, No-Face. Then we can give it to you. Do what we say. Then you'll get Rex. You'll get the chance to tear Rex apart. Piece by piece. Now we're ready.
: '''Rex:''' So you remember who I am. Surprised you have a big enough brain for that. These cells are pretty dull. Let's redecorate. No way I'm letting an EVO get won over on me. Especially a big old frog.
: '''Gatlocke:''' Almost out. Freedom is just a... Bottomless ravine away.
: '''Valve:''' The biker begs the question, how are we getting across?
: '''Gatlocke:''' You know that's not really how begging the question is supposed to be used. Are we kidding? Anyone who gets worked up over that phrase needs to be savagely beaten.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' This'll override the drawbridge system.
: '''Gatlocke:''' Ooh, now how would someone like you procure something like that?
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Friends and hide places.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, frog legs. Let's put you in solitary confinement.
: '''Bobo:''' Do you look like you got run over by an overstuffed garbage truck?
: '''Rex:''' Feels like it. This is a prison riot. Where's Providence? They should be all over this.
: '''Six:''' They never responded to any calls.
: '''Rex:''' It's a setup. Providence wanted this to happen. But why?
: '''Six:''' Six here. Go ahead.
: '''Rex:''' Wait. This bridge wasn't down before.
: '''Bobo:''' Yeah. About that. Some of the prisoners escaped together. Gatlocke...
: '''Rex:''' That's bad.
: '''Bobo:''' Hunter Cain...
: '''Rex:''' That's even worse!
: '''Bobo:''' Valve.
: '''Rex:''' That's... Really? Valve?
: '''Bobo:''' Yeah. And No-Face.
: '''Rex:''' Those four are loose? Together?
: '''Six:''' We've got a bigger problem.
: '''Rex:''' How can it be bigger than this?
: '''Six:''' The EVOs in the city-- The only thing keeping them tame are their control collars.
: '''Rex:''' And this is a problem because...?
: '''Six:''' Because someone has shut them all down.
: '''Rex:''' Let me get that for you.
: '''Bobo:''' Dumpster dog. Considering you used to ride around in the Paris, I guess you're moving up in the world. Main to your mud.
: '''Six:''' Are you injured?
: '''Rex:''' Just worn out. Is this day over yet?
: '''Bobo:''' Oh! Signs pointing no.
: '''Rex:''' Huh? That came from the track. Can you handle things here?
: '''Bobo:''' Only one way to find out. Valve. Those nanite superchargers you keep using are bad for your health.
: '''Valve:''' If I were you, I'd be more concerned with your own short-term health.
: '''Rex:''' Please, like I have anything to worry about from you. The other three, they're dangerous. You, you're just comedy relief.
: '''Valve:''' I am not. Comedy relief.
: '''Rex:''' Well, you're not funny, that's for sure.
: '''Valve:''' Like the road that continues on, so must the biker.
: '''Rex:''' Where did he go so? Ew! Get away from my tacos, cockroach! Huh? You running away? I'll give you this much, Valve. Maybe you're getting smarter.
: '''No-Face:''' Unlike you.
: '''Rex:''' I put you away once, No-Face. I'll do it again.
: '''No-Face:''' The one who makes machines. The one we've been waiting for.
: '''Rex:''' Huh? Figures you try to shoot a guy in the back.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' All I see is a filthy EVO.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, first off, that Lai is tired. Second off, last time I checked, you're teaming up with one. Would that make you an EVO lover? All this hide and seek is wearing me down! Huh? Figures.
: '''Gatlocke:''' Leaving so soon? That's not going to impress the hiring committee. Now, let's see what we have here. &quot;Honor roll, A/V Club.&quot; Ugh. &quot;Glee Club.&quot; ''[Scoffs]'' I'm going to have to be brutally honest with you. You're perfect for my gang. Can you sing soprano? My last soprano drove his motorcycle off a cliff. He survived, but his voice was never the same. By the way, can you fly? This is quite the surprise. I'm willing to hire you, Rex, but you better have some excellent references.
: '''Rex:''' Back to prison, Gatlocke!
: '''Gatlocke:''' Then consider the offer rescinded! You could be a valued member of my gang. It's a tough job market out there, you know?
: '''Rex:''' I'd never work for you!
: '''Gatlocke:''' No, not with that attitude, you wouldn't. Welcome to my gang. Your first task is to destroy Rex-- That guy right there.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Gatlocke:''' Your second task is to complete harassment training. I teach the class. This pamphlet explains everything.
: '''Rex:''' No, no, no!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, come in. What's happening?
: '''Rex:''' One really bad day.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Your nanite readings are off the charts.
: '''Rex:''' No surprise. I've been fighting and curing EVOs non stop.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' We need to upload your nanites immediately.
: '''Rex:'''  Now? Doc, my four worst enemies are still on the loose. Well, my three worst enemies in Valve. Plus the city's in chaos. And where in the world is Providence? How come they're not here dealing with this?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Six and Bobo can mop up the last few EVOs. You have to offload.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, fine. But we better make it fast.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You'll be locked in the chamber for one hour.
: '''Rex:''' Just do it, doc.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' This could be a long sixty minutes.
: '''Valve:''' According to the tracking bug, Rex is inside.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Gentlemen, this is what we've been waiting for. It's time for Rex to die.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' They followed him.
: '''Gatlocke:''' After we kill Rex. We should work together and form a team call ourselves... Gatlocke and the kitty cats.
: '''Valve:''' Silence your mouth or the biker will silence it for you.
: '''Gatlocke:''' Oh, Valve. You can pretend to be angry, but deep down, you know you're a kitty cat.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' They know we're here.
: '''Gatlocke:''' You're quite feisty. Have you ever considered a career in the fast growing field of post apocalyptic gangs?
: '''Valve:''' She has spirit. Valve the biker will see that spirit crushed.
: '''Gatlocke:''' You're Gatlocke's favorite kitty cat. Hmm. Rrr.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Don't follow her. She's trying to lead us away from Rex. Rex is close-by.
: '''Valve:''' Rex's chamber... Five minutes to spare.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' More than enough time.
: '''Gatlocke:''' I could have sworn that we'd agreed to take Rex out together.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' I'm changing the terms of the deal if you have a problem with that, feel free to stand right where you are. I've waited a long time for this. Rex!
: '''Valve:''' Empty? Or a trick of the mind?
: '''Rex:''' Isn't that obvious? Then again, that tracking bug you stuck on me was obvious, too. And the fake countdown? Obvious. It only took me thirty minutes to upload my nanites. You wanted to run me ragged so you could get me. Instead, here you are all in one place. Gotcha!
: '''Valve:''' UGHH!
: '''Rex:''' UGHHHH! I still don't get why you enlisted Valve. I mean, he's really a third-string bad guy.
: '''Valve:''' Valve is the biker. A biker is dangerous.
: '''Rex:''' Hmm. Yeah. No.
: '''Valve:''' Rrrr!
: '''Rex:''' So unpredictable. Like a third-string bad guy.
: '''Valve:''' AAAAH!
: '''Gatlocke:''' I have a horrible sneaking suspicion that he's winning.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' Then do something about it!
: '''Gatlocke:''' Don't have to yell. A kind word will get you much further.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Gatlocke:''' UGHHH! Oh! Oh! Oh ho ho! Ouch! My back! My front and my back! OHH! This is total, total agony!
: ''[Gatlocke gasps]''
: '''Gatlocke:''' ''[Calmly]'' I'm okay. Really. I'm fine.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' You're lucky. I'll give you that. But you're only delaying the inevitable. You can't beat us all!
: '''Rex:''' I never intended to. This offload facility? I reprogrammed it. My surplus nanites aren't being stored. They're powering the shield.
: '''Hunter Cain:''' It's a trap!
: '''Rex:''' Have fun keeping each other company!
: '''Bobo:''' What a day.
: '''Rex:''' You know, none of this would have happened if Providence hadn't released the convicts and turned out all those EVOs.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' They did that to keep you busy.
: '''Rex:''' Keep me busy from what?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' The Nanite Project. We just found out. While we dealt with the EVOs, Black Knight got her hands on another Master-Control Nanite.
: '''Rex:''' Then it's time.

===Sinister Secrets===
===Wounded Hearts===
===One Step Ahead===
===Breaking Point===
===Behind Closed Doors===

===Keeping Hope===
===Trust===

===Terror of the Black Knight===

===Endgame, Part One===
: '''Rex:''' It was going to happen sooner or later. We had most of the pieces, so it was only a matter of time before the Black Knight made her move. And of all the chances she had to attack, it had to be tonight... at this very moment... while I was in the shower. Huh? How many?
: '''Six:''' Should it matter?
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Can't you do any better than that?
: '''Bobo:''' I thought you'd never ask.
: '''Rex:''' Rah! Yah!
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' If they get to the Meta-Nanites, we still have options.
: '''Rex:''' Of the self-destruct kind? No, thanks, doc. It's not going to end that way... hopefully.
: '''Black Knight:''' We'll dispense with the pleasantries. You know what we want.
: '''Rex:''' There is no way you're walking out of here with the nanites.
: '''Black Knight:''' You seem so certain.
: '''Rex:''' We've beaten you before. Every single time, in fact. So, this time is different... How? Okay, that's different. Ugh! You're an EVO?!
: '''Black Knight:''' Do you think you were the only one they experimented on back in the day? You were the guinea pig. Consider me the new-and-improved version.
: '''Rex:''' Okay. Before we go any further, I should probably explain a few things. It started when a bunch of rich guys decided they wanted to live forever, so they got the best scientists in the world to figure out how. The answer was nanites. These microscopic machines would cure disease, end hunger, and pretty much make the world a better place. My parents and older brother were on the team, and so was this guy. Look familiar? Van Kleiss. Then one day there was an accident. To save my life, my parents injected me with nanites. It worked. But there were a few crazy side effects, like the fact I could talk to machines and, later on, build some pretty cool things. That got the rich guys thinking-- How far could we take this? Turns out pretty far. These little machines could control the very fabric of the Universe, but they would need a Master-Control Nanite to program all the others and tell them what to do. Energy, gravity, time/space, elemental, mechanical-- All the things that make the Universe run. Combined together, they would pretty much make you a God. And when my brother and parents found out the Consortium was about to put these nanites inside themselves, they sort of freaked out in a &quot;got to save the Earth&quot; kind of way. Something had to be done to stop it. Turns out that meant blowing the whole thing up, better known as &quot;The Nanite Event&quot;. That didn't end well for my parents. While everyone else ran away, my parents were trapped inside. Sill not sure how. There was some good news-- No more Master-Control Nanites. And the bad news? Dangerous unprogrammed nanites got spread across the world, and nanites plus DNA equals EVO. My brother Caesar got caught in a time warp during his escape. Van Kleiss got blown to smithereens and became the world's biggest pain in the nanite. And me? I got amnesia and traveled the globe living the good life... At least, that's how I tell it. The only part I know of wasn't all that much to brag about. I did get some good friends and a few enemies out of the deal. Turns out that losing my memory was a regular thing for me. Last time I woke up and said, &quot;Who Am I?&quot; It was when this guy found me-- Agent Six. He worked for Providence, sort of a global police force created to clean up after the event. It was paid for mostly by the same group of goons that started the whole thing-- The Consortium. It was great for a while. I had my own personal doctor, a chimp sidekick, a cool best friend to hang with. I was a full-fledged hero. The world loved me, and my powers kept getting better and better. Van Kleiss was still a pain, but I managed to take care of him. A few times, actually. Then things started to get not so cool. My brother shows up from out of nowhere. I get thrown six months into the future to find White Knight kicked out of Providence and this lady in charge-- Black Knight. She's been the lapdog of the Consortium from day one, and now her bosses want to pick up where they left off. Most of the old team of scientists have been reunited, and together, they've restarted the nanite program. The Master-Control Nanites were spread across the globe in the first explosion, and we've been racing against Providence to get them back. So far, we've been winning that fight, and that pretty much brings us to right now.
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Black Knight grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' The Black Pawns are robots?!
: '''Black Knight:''' Total obedience at the flip of a switch. Can you blame me?
: '''Black Pawn:''' What's so funny?
: '''Six:''' I hold back against people. You're not people.
: ''[Bobo Haha grunts]''
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Black Knight grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' Huh? Ugh!
: '''Feakins:''' Hey! Hey! Take it easy, would you? Oh!
: '''Rex:''' Fitzy?!
: '''Feakins:''' Heh? Sorry, guy. They found me. She's hard to say &quot;No&quot; to... and live.
: '''Black Knight:''' Well put, Mr. Feakins. And thanks to his unique ability, we can set aside our nanite enhancements and do this the old-fashioned way.
: '''Rex:''' Come on. That's not fair. I'm unarmed!
: '''Black Knight:''' Precisely.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Stop! Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad idea.
: '''Rex:''' Listen to the crazy guy.
: '''Black Knight:''' Why are you here, Van Kleiss?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' I forgot. Oh, no, wait. I remember. He's got a Master-Control Nanite swallowed up inside him. It's been hiding, the naughty thing.
: '''Rex:''' On second thought, don't listen to him. He's, uh-- He's crazy, remember?
: '''Black Knight:''' You're sure of this?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' Oh, yes, yes. Quite sure. Do you have any mints?
: '''Black Knight:''' I want Rex at the lab. Restrain and sedate him.
: '''Rex:''' How, hold on a minute.
: '''Feakins:''' Hey! What about me?
: '''Black Knight:''' I'm not taking any chances. He stays with Rex. Kill the others.
: '''Rex:''' Ugh! Ahh.
: '''Master-Control Nanite:''' Human.
: '''Rex:''' What are you telling me? What do you want?
: '''Master-Control Nanite:''' Complete. Complete. Complete. Complete. Complete.
: '''Rex:''' Okay, I get it. How?
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Rex gasps]''
: '''Caesar:''' Calm down, Rex. You're safe.
: '''Rex:''' Safe?! Black Knight and her robo-troopers just came knocking, and Van crazy says I have a Master-Control Nanite inside me!
: '''Caesar:''' Fascinating, isn't it? All this time, it's been hiding undetected inside you. I wonder if this particular control unit is responsible for his unique nano-evolution.
: '''Rex:''' Are any of you even listening to me?
: '''Feakins:''' Boy, I am. It's like a movie but real! I just want to go start pressing buttons. Can I get another milkshake?
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' How exactly do you plan on getting it out of him?
: '''Black Knight:''' I have a suggestion. Tear it out.
: '''Rylander:''' It would kill him.
: '''Black Knight:''' That's none of my concern.
: '''Caesar:''' The nanite is tied to his DNA. Simply pulling it out of him would ruin the nanite.
: '''Rex:''' And me, too, remember?
: '''Caesar:''' The only way this will work is if we put him in the cyclotron with the other Metas. It should extract automatically during the reassembly.
: '''Black Knight:''' And if it doesn't?
: '''Caesar:''' Hmm. Good question.
: '''Rex:''' Here's another one-- Don't I get a say in this? Like, isn't this the exact thing that our parents died trying to stop?
: '''Black Knight:''' Take him to the hub and prepare for the transfer. The Consortium is here and extremely impatient. I want this finished within the hour.
: '''Feakins:''' Aah! Hey, what am I-- Sandpaper? Not so rough! ''[sputtering]'' Rough.
: '''Rex:''' Glad someone can see the humor in this.
: '''Black Knight:''' Van Kleiss, see that Rex is well taken care of.
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' ''[to Caesar]'' I hope you know what you're doing, Salazar. This is a huge risk we're taking.
: '''Rylander:''' Listen to Peter. The thing we swore to stop at any cost, the thing that took your parents-- It could happen-- Right here, today!
: '''Caesar:''' It can't, and it won't. You'll have to trust me on this.
: '''Rylander:''' You can only say that so many times, Caesar.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' We've been waiting almost an hour. Not even refreshments?
: '''Black Knight:''' You can have your snack after we become Gods.
: '''Roswell:''' &quot;We&quot;?
: '''Black Knight:''' That's right-- &quot;We.&quot; None of this would be possible without my efforts.
: '''Roswell:''' And our money, sister.
: '''Black Knight:''' By all means, have your contempt. There's plenty of room buried next to the Russian if you'd like to keep him company. That's what I thought. Now, if you'll follow me--
: '''Bobo:''' &quot;Kill the others.&quot; Not gonna happen, lady. We're bulletproof. Ow! Hangnail.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Ugh! We know where they took him. Why are we here? We need to go get Rex.
: '''Six:''' I agree. We just don't have the resources, Rebecca. We'd need an army.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You've been known to make the impossible happen, Six. How hard could that be?
: '''Six:''' Six here. Copy that. We just got ourselves an army.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' You see?
: '''Van Kleiss:''' That will be all.
: '''Feakins:''' But the lady said-- Good luck, Kid.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' These restraints were made for you. You're very special, you know.
: '''Rex:''' Lucky me.
: '''Caesar:''' Van Kleiss... leave us.
: '''Rex:''' I really hate you.
: '''Caesar:'''I know how this looks, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' But what? I just have to trust you? Is that what you were going to say? Just help me-- Please.
: '''Caesar:''' It may not seem like it, but I am.
: '''Rex:''' Caesar... I'm scared.
: '''Caesar:''' So am I, little brother. This will all be over in a few minutes.
: '''Rex:''' It's already over! When I get out of this, I never want to see you again!
: '''Rylander:''' Commencing countdown.
: '''Roswell:''' WHOO-HOO!
: '''Reddick:''' Payback time!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Caesar:''' This won't be entirely unpleasant. It should feel similar to when you offload surplus nanites.
: '''Rex:''' Stop! You can't do this! You can't merge!
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' Something's wrong.
: '''Rylander:''' Of course something's wrong. The kid is fighting it.
: '''Caesar:''' This could be bad.
: '''Rylander:''' You have to tell him, Caesar!
: '''Caesar:''' Rex, you have to stop. Listen to me. The nanites are supposed to do-- Rex? Can you hear me?
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' Actually, he can't. There's a short in the comm relay.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' This would be a wonderful day for a picnic.
: '''Rex:''' RA-A-A-A-A-A-H!
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' Ugh!
: '''Black Knight:''' Ugh!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' So much for that plan.
: ''[Rex laughs]''
: '''Rex:''' Oh, serves you right. All that and you come out of the oven looking like freaks. Nice job!
: '''Black Knight:''' It's not exactly what we were expecting, but it's a start.
: '''Reddick:''' This isn't what we agreed to.
: '''Roswell:''' Where's the rest of our power? This is all messed up!
: '''Dr. Meechum:''' How can this be possible?
: '''Rylander:''' The Meta-Nanites were dispersed between the five. This is quite a surprise.
: '''Caesar:''' We've got to get Rex out of there. Step aside, Van Kleiss.
: '''Van Kleiss:''' They still don't have what they want... and neither do you.
: '''Black Knight:''' You're angry. I can see that. If you want to take it out on anyone, it should be Rex.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' I think I can agree to that.
: '''Roswell:''' Count me in! This might actually be fun!
: '''Rex:''' Let's think about this for a second. Whoa!
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: '''Rex:''' How 'bout that? Exactly one second. Whoa! Aah!
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' What a perfect way to learn to use our powers-- Tearing this brat apart.
: '''Rex:''' Only one problem with that, sparky. I've been using my powers a whole lot longer-- And I'm pretty good.
: '''Roswell:''' You got any ideas here, missy, or we gonna stand around and get it handed to us?
: '''Black Knight:''' The Meta-Nanites were designed to work together. So will we.
: '''Rex:''' What? Are you gonna join together to make a robo-mutant?
: '''Black Knight:''' That's exactly what we're going to do.
: '''Rex:''' I need to stop giving them ideas. Huh?
: ''[Rex grunts]''
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Black Knight:''' No one the help you-- No family, no friends, nothing. It's a terrible way to go.
: '''White Knight:''' Captain Calan, target the base. All weapons, sire.
: '''Providence Agent:''' Fire control reports they're being jammed, sir.
: '''White Knight:''' Only one salvo. Black Knight must have prepared for this.
: ''[Rex groans softly]''
: '''Rex:''' Big giant robot. Black Knight.
: '''Six:''' We know.
: '''Rex:''' Have to... stay and stop them.
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Another time, Rex.
: '''Rex:''' I-I--
: ''[Rex groans]''
: '''Dr. Holiday:''' Holiday to White Knight. We have Rex.
: '''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' We're just gonna watch them go?!
: '''Black Knight:''' Let Providence have their weapon back. With our combined power, the world is ours.

===Endgame, Part Two===
:'''Black Knight:''' Science has given us a tremendous gift-- Nanites. We've seen what they can do-- The good and the bad. But they're true potential has been largely unseen. Until now. Our goals are varied. Fame... power... revenge... wealth... order. Yet, one thing unites us-- Greed. You're surprised I admit it? Well, don't be. You'll never get far in life without wanting it all. And for those who might consider standing in our way... We'll let our powers speak for themselves. The world is ours. And no one can stop us.
:''[Roswell laughs]''
:'''Roswell:''' This is more fun than my first rodeo. What else you got?
:'''Six:''' Any change?
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' He's sleeping. The nanites in him are making repairs. That's a good thing. He's a tough kid, Six.
:'''Six:''' I know.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' See you next time. Judging by what you fed us for lunch, I'm guessing twenty minutes. Can't even go to the little scientists' room without them breathing down our necks. How long are we going to put up with this?
:'''Caesar:''' I know it's not easy working under these circumstances.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' Do you? I don't hear you complaining, or have you even noticed that we're prisoniers?
:'''Rylander:''' Gentlemen, please. Can we focus on a more important problem? The Consortium's gain of power is a troubling outcome. Something should be done.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' If you're talking about stopping them, I'm listening.
:'''Black Knight:''' I want you all in the boardroom in three minutes.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' The world is being taken over by nanite-fueled ex-c.e.o. Psychos, and they still act like they're running a business.
:'''Roswell:''' You nerds gave us a raw deal. I want a do-over.
:'''Caesar''': A do-over?
:'''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' What my colleague means to say is that our powers are remarkable to be sure, but we only have one seventh of what we were promised.
:'''Rylander:''' You're asking a lot.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' You're asking the impossible. You'd be lucky to survive the extraction.
:'''Caesar:''' This is true. You may be powerful, but you're not Rex.
:'''Black Knight:''' I share your disappointment, gentlemen. But are you willing to lose everything for this?
:'''Roswell:''' Go big or go home.
:'''Black Knight:''' Van Kleiss, what do you have to say?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Easy-peasy. I can do it. It's only a matter of correctly calibrating the bio-filters with the homing frequency of the nanites. By the way, have you seen my socks?
:'''Caesar:''' Van Kleiss--
:'''Black Knight:''' Has an assignment. The rest of you... Stay out of trouble.
:'''Rex:''' You started without me.
:'''Six:''' Glad to see you up and around. Something bothering you?
:'''Rex:''' Besides black knight taking over the world? I'm trying to find my friends. I know Providence took them.
:'''Six:''' We're working on that.
:'''Rex:''' And are we doing anything about the Consortium? What about... The robot? The one I can build. Don't play dumb, Six.
:'''Six:''' Come with me.
:'''Rex:''' That's me? No way! All this time, I could have been making myself into that thing? Ohh! Maybe not.
:'''Six:''' Evidence suggest that you've never been able to control it. It's a weapon of last defense. This was filmed on the day that I found you. It was also the day I made a promise that it would be the last time you ever built this machine.
:''[Rex scoffs]''
:'''Rex:''' Or what, you'd kill me? You plan on keeping that promise?
:'''Six:''' Rex, you have to know something. We believe this is the type of thing that ends in you losing your memory.
:'''Rex:''' Well, it happened to you, and you turned out just fine.
:'''Six:''' I only lost six years. Six years is all you have. You would lose everything. I'm not gonna tell you what to do, but you need to think about the consequences of some of your options.
:'''Noah:''' It feels weird hanging out when the world is under attack. I don't know if I should be fighting back or out in the wilderness setting up a survival compound.
:'''Rex:''' If you had the power to stop all this, but it meant losing everything, would you do it, Noah?
:'''Noah:''' I don't know. I'm just glad I don't have to make that kind of decision. I guess that's why you're the hero.
:''[Rex sighs]''
:'''Rex:''' I wish I could get some kind of sign. Anything. Hmm.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Red and yellow, red and yellow. One false move can kill a fellow.
:''[Van Kleiss laughs]''
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' He's got local control. We're locked out. I still don't even know how this is possible.
:'''Rylander:''' I've been looking at the data projections. As crazy as Van Kleiss is, his theory is sound.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Sorry to disturb your sleepy sleep. There might be a slight delay.
:'''Black Knight:''' Why?
:'''Van Kleiss:''' We have a visitor. Should I set out tea?
:'''Rex:''' Hey, in there! Come on out!
:'''Black Knight:''' Back for more? Happy to accommodate.
:'''Rex:''' I should warn you. It's going to get ugly.
:'''Black Knight:''' One would think you would have learned the last time. I can feel you resisting me. Stop.
:'''Roswell:''' Why is it you get to call all the shots?
:'''Black Knight:''' Because I'm the one who has the power to join us. Help me defeat Rex, and you can call all the shots you like.
:'''Rex:''' Hyah!
:''[Rex babbling]''
:''[Rex gasps]''
:'''Six:''' It's a weapon of last defense. It's happened.
:'''Noah:''' That's Rex?
:'''White Knight:''' I'm going to assume you're seeing what I'm seeing.
:'''Six:''' White--
:'''White Knight:''' Before you say anything, Six-- Whatever agreement we may have had regarding this situation no longer applies. Am I clear?
:'''Six:''' Understood.
:'''Dr. Holiday''': What was that all about?
:'''Six:''' A second chance.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Six, we have to do something.
:'''Six:''' I've seen it before. We're too late.
:''[Rex coughing]''
:'''Rex:''' Donde esta mi zapato?
:'''Noah:''' Rex! Hold on!
:'''Rex:''' What? What happened?
:'''Bobo:''' You blew up, kid.
:'''Six:''' Do you know who we are?
:'''Rex:''' I... I do! Oh-ho! I remember! Ow! Ow! I wish I could forget this pain in my... The Consortium!
:'''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' This is utter nonsense. I refuse to be led around like a show dog.
:'''Reddick:''' You can always go back outside and take it up with Providence.
:'''Black Knight:''' Guard the door. Nothing gets by you.
:'''Six:''' They're robots.
:'''Rex:''' Oh! Right! That part I forgot.
:'''Bobo:''' Next time, leave some for the rest of us, huh?
:'''Rylander:''' I'll stay here and guard the equipment.
:''[Rylander laughs]''
:'''Caesar:''' Little brother, they've had this place completely locked down. I've been trying to reach you.
:'''Bobo:''' What he said.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' Yeah, you deserved that.
:'''Rex:''' Open it.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' We can't. Still completely locked out of the system. Besides, you can't interrupt once the cycle has started.
:'''Rex:''' Well, then, un-start it!
:'''Black Knight:''' You cleaned up for the occasion. How thoughtful of you.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Oh, this isn't for you. You didn't actually believe that I'd let the five of you have all this power.
:'''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' I thought you were working for us?
:''[Van Kleiss laughs evilly]''
:'''Rex:''' You see that? I knew it! He's not crazy! Okay... oh! He's crazy, but just his usual crazy.
:'''Black Knight:''' Van Kleiss, I am not amused.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' I don't imagine you would be. This was always my intention, even in the very beginning. It's a pity your parents caught me trying to activate the sequence for myself. And, of course, there's the &quot;broken&quot; hatch. The world would be a much better place if they had just left well enough alone.
:'''Anthony Haden-Scott:''' Black Knight, do something.
:'''Black Knight:''' Van Kleiss, you have made a huge mistake.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Now, then, let the fun begin.
:''[Black Knight groans]''
:''[Van Kleiss laughs evilly]''
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' You can't overload that relay from a subdirectory. You have to get a root. It's impossible from here.
:'''Caesar:''' You're a very negative person, Peter Meechum.
:''[Dr. Meechum groans]''
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' I'll try from the main terminal in the lab.
:''[Rex grunts]''
:'''Caesar:''' Rex, wait! That's not necessary.
:'''Rex:''' I'm not waiting around, hermano.
:'''Caesar:''' No. That's not what I mean.
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Yes. I can see it.
:''[Van Kleiss laughs evilly]''
:'''Van Kleiss:''' Huh? No.
:''[Van Kleiss groans]''
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' It's incredible something so small could have so much [[w:Omnipotence|power]]. That thing could rip apart the very fabric of the universe.
:'''Rex:''' It's still a nanite. I'm gonna talk to it.
:'''Caesar:''' No. It's okay.
:''[The fully complete Meta Nanite comes to Rex, as if it were waiting for him, whose eyes and body glow with a pale blue cosmic aura.]''
:'''Caesar:''' Rex, listen to me. The Meta-Nanite-- It could never work in anyone but you. Now in its pure state. Mom and dad, we programmed them that way from the very beginning. All of this... It's meant for you.
:'''Six:''' What are you saying?
:'''Caesar:''' Right now, Rex is [[Omnipotence|the most powerful being in the universe]].
:'''Bobo:''' You hear that, Kid? Don't let it get to your head.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' Rex, can you hear me?
:'''Rex:''' Yeah, doc. This is pretty trippy. Not exactly sure what I'm supposed to do now.
:'''Black Knight:''' You're a [[God]], Rex. You can do anything you want.
:'''Six:''' You know what to do.
:'''Rex:''' You're right, Six. So are the rest of you. I can do anything I want. Maybe it's time for a revolution. Isn't that what you five wanted? A revolution? Well, welcome to it.
:'''Noah:''' Is he gonna be like this from now on?
:'''Rylander:''' Uh... People. He's inside the nanite reactor.
:'''Dr. Holiday and Caesar:''' Inside?
:'''Rex:''' Okay, little guys. I need you to do something for me.
:'''Black Knight:''' Follow me, quickly.
:'''Reddick:''' I'm through following you. We trusted you everything, and look what we got.
:'''Black Knight:''' We may still be able to retain some of our abilities, but only if you follow me.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' Are you seeing this?
:'''Rylander:''' Tehnically, I don't have eyes, but yes.
:'''Providence Agent:''' Reports are coming in. EVO's all over the world are spontaneously curing.
:'''Six:''' Not spontaneous.
:'''Caesar:''' He must have programmed all the nanites in the reactor to initiate a worldwide cure event.
:'''Black Knight:''' What is your next directive?
:'''Rex:''' I don't want anyone using you again. Ever. And that includes me. Deactivate.
:''[Rex groans]''
:'''Rex:''' I think it's over.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' I think you're right.
:'''Caesar:''' I wanted to tell you, brother. So much was at stake.
:'''Rex:''' We're good. And we'll always be brothers.
:'''Diane Ferrah:''' Across the world, not an EVO to be found. After more than six years, it appears we've awoken from the nightmare.
:'''White Knight:''' The EVOs may be gone, but we still have nanites.
:'''Rex:''' Leave it to you to spoil  all the fun, White Knight.
:'''Dr. Holiday:''' There are some people here to see you, Rex.
:'''Rex:''' Tuck? Cricket? Skwydd?
:'''Skwydd:''' Eh, I guess I should start going by Walter again.
:''[Rex runs to Circe and the two lovers share a close hug, happy to be together at last]''
:'''Rex:''' Uh... Are you...?
:'''Circe:''' I'm okay. Normal, but okay. I think you may have put yourself out of a job.
:'''Skywdd:''' Yeah. What are you gonna do? Go to school?
:'''Rylander:''' It was nice having the team back together. You know, we should find a new project.
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' You kidding? I'd rather have root canal with a rake. Worst experience of my life.
:'''Caesar:''' Do you want to hear about some of my new ideas or not?
:'''Dr. Meechum:''' I'm listening.
:'''Rex:''' Finally.
:'''Six:''' Need anything?
:'''Rex:''' Nope. I'm good. There's always going to be something, isn't there?
:'''Six:''' Yes, there is.

==Characters==
===Main===
*Rex Salazar (Daryl Sabara)
*Six
*White Knight
*Bobo Haha
===Supporting===
*Circe (Tara Sands)
*Tuck (Dante Bosco) 
*Skwydd
*Cricket
*Beverley Holiday 
*Caesar Salazar
*Five
*Tres
*IV

===Villains===
*Van Kleiss
*The Pack
*Gatlocke
*Hunter Cain
*Quarry
*Black Knight
*The Consortium
===Couples===
*Dr. Rebecca Holiday &amp; Six
*Rex &amp; Circe
*Noah Nixon &amp; Claire Bowman
==Elements==
===Rex's Machines &quot;Builds&quot;===
*Big Fat Sword
*Buzz Saw
*Punk Busters
*Boogie Pack
*Cannon
*Smack Hands

===Rex's Other Abilities===
*Technopathy
*Data Manipulation
*Technological Manipulation 
*E.V.O. Curing
*Breach Detection
*Electronic Disruption

===Omega Nanite-Powered Builds===
*Blast Caster
*Funchucks
*Bad Axes
*Block Party
*Sky Slider
*Water Jet

==External Links==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1636691/ Generator Rex] at [[Internet Movie Database]]
* [http://generatorrexpedia.wikia.com/wiki/Generator_Rex Generator Rex] at Wikia

{{Authority control}}
[[Category:2010s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated action TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero TV shows]]
[[Category:Teen superhero TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Television series on DVD]]
[[Category:Teen animated TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>kg6eabpl8wrw6r8wtdo3mz40v5ux8qg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Devil</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>126358</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964916</id>
      <parentid>3958870</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:51:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Undid revision [[Special:Diff/3958870|3958870]] by [[Special:Contributions/~2026-37414-82|~2026-37414-82]] ([[User talk:~2026-37414-82|talk]])</comment>
      <origin>3964916</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="45235" sha1="tq8v1r0o3966umlg47xynikx3ncelv7" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Diableria Res Satanae.png|thumb| If there is a devil in [[human]] [[history]], that devil is the [[principle]] of [[command]]. It alone, sustained by the [[ignorance]] and [[stupidity]] of the [[masses]], without which it could not exist, is the source of all the [[catastrophes]], all the [[crimes]], and all the [[infamies]] of history. ~ [[Mikhail Bakunin]] ]]
A '''{{w|devil}}''' is the {{w|personification}} of [[evil]] as it is conceived in many and various cultures and religious traditions. It is seen as the objectification of a hostile and destructive force.

== Quotes ==
[[File:The history of the devil and the idea of evil; from the earliest times to the present day (1899) (14589601227).jpg|thumb|Mara, as the Prince of the world, holding in his clutches the wheel of life, has been preserved, we can learn from a comparison of an old fresco in the deserted caves of Central India,  with Tibetan and Japanese pictures of the same subject.  All of them show in the centre the three causes of selfhood, viz., hatred, spite, and sloth, symbolised in a serpent, a cock, and a pig. They are also called the three fires, or the three roots of evil,which are raga (passion), doso (sin), 7noho (infatuation).]]
[[File:Histoires Prodigieuses; Effigie du faulx Imposteur...WMS 136 Wellcome L0025526.jpg|thumb|The Christians were the first to make the existence of Satan a dogma of the Church...  the clergy fear above all to be forced to relinquish this hold on humanity. They are not willing to let us judge of the tree (Christianity) by its fruits... ~ [[H.P. Blavatsky]]]]
[[File:The number of the beast is 666 Philadelphia, Rosenbach Museum and Library.jpg|244px|thumb|right|He is as ready as he can wish...to devise as many ways as can be to deface and obscure [[God]]'s [[glory]]. ~ [[Hugh Latimer]] ]]
[[File:Ary Scheffer - The Temptation of Christ (1854).jpg|thumb|In the most deeply [[significant]] of the legends concerning [[Jesus]], we are told how the devil took him up into a high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the [[world]] in a moment of [[time]]… [[Upton Sinclair]] ]]
[[File:Ilya Repin - Get Thee Behind Me, Satan - 1895.png|thumb|[[Jesus]], as we know, answered and said &quot;Get thee behind me, [[Satan]]!&quot; And he really meant it; he would have nothing to do with worldly glory, with &quot;temporal power&quot;… [[Upton Sinclair]] ]]

===A===
*Remember the ancient saying, “If you seize the lesser devil by the tail, he will lead you to his superior.”
**[[Agni Yoga]], ''Supermundane''   (1938)

* '''If there is a [[devil]] in [[human]] [[history]], that devil is the [[principle]] of [[command]].''' It alone, sustained by the [[ignorance]] and [[stupidity]] of the [[masses]], without which it could not exist, is the source of all the [[catastrophes]], all the [[crimes]], and all the [[infamies]] of history.
** [[Mikhail Bakunin]], &quot;On the Program of the Alliance&quot; (1871), in Bakunin on Anarchy (1971), translated and edited by Sam Dolgoff
** Variant: '''If there is a devil in history, it is the power principle.'''
*** As quoted in leader to the film [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pCigAw2-0g ''Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th century'' (2010)]

===B===
*The Bible is very vague. Bits and pieces from lots of now-defunct religions got synthesized: The cloven feet from Pan, the horns from the gods of various cults in the near east. In the 15th and 16th century, these solidified into this personification of evil, seen as the great enemy of Christ, the Church, and mankind: a horned, bestial, furry figure.
** Bernard Barryte curator of Stanford’s Cantor Art Centers, ''Sympathy for the Devil: Satan, Sin and the Underworld'' [http://www.fastcodesign.com/3034309/the-changing-face-of-satan-artistic-depictions-of-the-devil-1500-to-today Artistic Depictions of the Devil 1500-today]

* He complained in no way of the [[evil]] reputation under which he lived, indeed, all over the [[world]], and he assured me that he himself was of all living beings the most interested in the destruction of ''Superstition'', and he avowed to me that he had been afraid, relatively as to his proper power, once only, and that was on the day when he had heard a preacher, more subtle than the rest of the human herd, cry in his pulpit: &quot;My dear brethren, do not ever forget, when you hear the progress of lights praised, that '''the loveliest trick of the Devil is to persuade you that he does not exist'''!&quot;
**[[Charles Baudelaire]], [http://gutenberg.net.au/ebooks06/0607031h.html &quot;The Generous Gambler&quot;] (Feb. 1864).
**''Variant:'' &quot;The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.&quot;, ''[[The Usual Suspects]]'' (1995)

* Wow! I like that, see? Because that's the way the devil does it. Everytime you make an error, everytime you make a mistake and I mean it's nothing but a mistake; the first thing he says is 'if you are what you say you are', 'If you are a preacher', 'If you were a Christian'. That's the devil, everytime you hear it from somebody. Did you hear what I said? Everytime you hear somebody make a suggestion like that, remember that's not them, that's the devil! And I don't want to go too much further without telling you this: Before the devil even opens his mouth you ought already know who you are. It won't shake you, it won't bother you, because you already know who you are!&quot;
**[[w:LeRoy Bailey Jr|LeRoy Bailey Jr.]], Senior Pastor of [[w:The First Cathedral|The First Cathedral]], in a sermon entitled &quot;An Abundant Overflowing Thought&quot; 2008. The First Cathedral Media Ministries.

* The devil, you see, is that friend who never stays with us to the end.
**[[Georges Bernanos]], ''Monsieur Ouine'' (1943), translated by William S. Bush. Lincoln NE: University of Nebraska Press, 2000, p. 171

* How did the Devil come? When first attack?
** [[John Betjeman]], ''Norfolk'', from ''A Few Late Chrysanthemums'' (1954)

*&quot;There is a personal God, and there is a personal Devil!&quot; thunders the Christian preacher. &quot;Let him be anathema who dares say nay!&quot; &quot;There is no personal God, except the gray matter in our brain,&quot; contemptuously replies the materialist. &quot;And there is no Devil. Let him be considered thrice an idiot who says aye.&quot; Meanwhile the occultists and true philosophers heed neither of the two combatants, but keep perseveringly at their work. None of them believe in the absurd, passionate, and fickle God of superstition, but all of them believe in good and evil. p. 31
** [[Helena Blavatsky|Helena Blavatsky,]]  ''Isis Unveiled'', Vol. I Science, (1877)
 
*&quot;Shut the door in the face of the daemon,&quot; says the Kabala, &quot;and he will keep running away from you, as if you pursued him,&quot; which means, that you must not give a hold on you to such spirits of obsession by attracting them into an atmosphere of congenial sin. These daemons seek to introduce themselves into the bodies of the simple-minded and idiots, and remain there until dislodged therefrom by a powerful and pure will. Jesus, Apollonius, and some of the apostles, had the power to cast out devils, by purifying the atmosphere within and without the patient, so as to force the unwelcome tenant to flight. p. 319
** [[Helena Blavatsky|Helena Blavatsky,]]  ''Isis Unveiled'', Vol. I Science, (1877)

*The true doctrine of Buddha says that the demons, when nature produced the sun, moon, and stars, were human beings, but, on account of their sins, they fell from the state of felicity. If they commit greater sins, they suffer greater punishments, and condemned men are reckoned by them among the devils; while, on the contrary, demons who die (elemental spirits) and are born or incarnated as men, and commit no more sin, can arrive at the state of celestial felicity. p. 402 
** [[Helena Blavatsky|Helena Blavatsky,]]  ''Isis Unveiled'', Vol. I Science, (1877)
 
* William Roper: So now you'd give the Devil benefit of law!&lt;br&gt;Sir Thomas More: Yes! What would you do? Cut a great road through the law to get after the Devil?&lt;br&gt;William Roper: Yes, I'd cut down every law in England to do that!&lt;br&gt;Sir Thomas More: Oh? And when the last law was down, and the Devil turned 'round on you, where would you hide, Roper, the laws all being flat? This country is planted thick with laws, from coast to coast, Man's laws, not God's! And if you cut them down, and you're just the man to do it, do you really think you could stand upright in the winds that would blow then? Yes, I'd give the Devil benefit of law, for my own safety's sake!
** [[Robert Bolt]], ''A Man for All Seasons'' (1967), act I, p. 39.

* Every man for himself, his own ends, the devil for all.
** [[Robert Burton]], ''The Anatomy of Melancholy'' (1621), Part III, Section I. Memb, III

* '''The Devil himself, which is the author of confusion and lies.'''
** [[Robert Burton]], ''The Anatomy of Melancholy'' (1621), Part III, Section IV. Memb. I. Subsection III

* And bid the devil take the hin'most.
** [[Samuel Butler (poet)|Samuel Butler]], ''Hudibras'', Part I (1663-64), Canto II, line 633. Burns, ''To a Haggis''. [[John Fletcher]], ''The Tragedy of Bouduca'', Act IV, scene 2

* Nick Machiavel had ne'er a trick&lt;br&gt;(Though he gave his name to our Old Nick).
** [[Samuel Butler (poet)|Samuel Butler]], ''Hudibras'', Part III (1678), Canto I, line 1,313

===D===
* Here is the devil-and-all to pay.
** [[Miguel de Cervantes]], ''Don Quixote'' (1605-15), Book IV, Part I, Chapter X

* Well the Devil went down to Georgia &lt;br&gt; He was lookin' for a soul to steal &lt;br&gt; He was in a bind 'cause he was way behind &lt;br&gt; And he was willin' to make a deal.&lt;br&gt;
: When he came across this young man &lt;br&gt; Sawin' on a fiddle and playin' it hot &lt;br&gt; And the Devil jumped up on a hickory stump &lt;br&gt; And said, &quot;Boy, let me tell you what&quot; &lt;br&gt;
: &quot;You probably didn't know it &lt;br&gt; But I'm a fiddle player too &lt;br&gt; And if you care to take a dare &lt;br&gt; I'll just make a bet with you.&quot; &lt;br&gt;
:* [[w:Charlie Daniels|Charlie Daniels]] ''[[w:The Devil Went Down to Georgia|The Devil Went Down to Georgia]]'' from the album [[w:Million Mile Reflections|Million Mile Reflections]] (1979)

* '''Wherever God erects a house of prayer,&lt;br&gt;The Devil always builds a chapel there:&lt;br&gt;And 'twill be found, upon examination,&lt;br&gt;The latter has the largest congregation.'''
** [[Daniel Defoe]], ''The True-Born Englishman'' (1701)

* [[w:The king is dead, long live the king!|Long live]] the Devil.
** {{w|Ernest Defarge}}, in [[Charles Dickens]], ''[[Tale of Two Cities]]'' (1859), Book 1, Chapter 5: ''The Wine Shop'', p. 6 

* Satan is an empty shell, you know. He can only use and pervert that which comes from the lips of God. This is his forte.
** [[Catherine Doherty]], ''Sobornost'' (1977). Expanded second edition (Combermere, Ontario: Madonna House Publications, 2011), p. 93

===E===
* '''The Devil is not the Prince of Matter; the Devil is the [[arrogance]] of the [[spirit]], [[faith]] without [[smile]], [[truth]] that is never seized by [[doubt]].''' The Devil is grim because he knows where he is going, and, in moving, he always returns whence he came.
** [[Umberto Eco]] in ''[[w:The Name of the Rose|The Name of the Rose]]'' (1980)

===F===
* The devil is chained. He can bark, but he cannot bite, unless we go up to him and let him do so.
** [[Frederick William Faber]], ''Growth in Holiness, or The Progress of the Spiritual Life'' (Baltimore: John Murphy &amp; Co., 1855), Ch. XIV: &quot;Temptations&quot;, pp. 292–293

===G===
*'''[[w:Lucifer (comics)|Lucifer]]''': Why do they blame me for all their little failings? They use my name as if I spent my entire days sitting on their shoulders, forcing them to commits acts they would otherwise find repulsive. 'The devil made me do it.' I have never made one of them do anything. Never. They live their own tiny lives. I do not live their lives for them.
** [[Neil Gaiman]], ''[[The Sandman]], Vol. 4: Season of Mists''

* One is always wrong to open a conversation with the devil, for, however he goes about it, he always insists on having the last word.
** [[André Gide]], 1917, in ''Journals 1889–1949'', translated by Justin O'Brien

===H===
* You see, Mr. Simpson—a man, well, he'll walk right into Hell with both eyes open. But even the Devil can't fool a dog!
** Angel, ''The Hunt'' [[The Twilight Zone]] written by Earl Hamner, Jr.

* While the lime-burner was struggling with the horror of these thoughts, Ethan Brand rose from the log, and flung open the door of the kiln. The action was in such accordance with the idea in Bertram's mind, that he almost expected to see the Evil One issue forth, red-hot, from the raging furnace.&lt;br /&gt;Hold! hold!&quot; cried he, with a tremulous attempt to laugh; for he was ashamed of his fears, although they overmastered him. &quot;Don't, for mercy's sake, bring out your Devil now!&quot;&lt;br /&gt;&quot;Man!&quot; sternly replied Ethan Brand, &quot;what need have I of the Devil? I have left him behind me, on my track. It is with such half-way sinners as you that he busies himself. ...&quot; He stirred the vast coals, thrust in more wood, and bent forward to gaze into the hollow prison-house of the fire, regardless of the fierce glow that reddened his face. ...&quot;I have looked,&quot; said he, &quot;into many a human heart that was seven times hotter with sinful passions than yonder furnace is with fire. But I found not there what I sought. No, not the Unpardonable Sin!&quot;
** [[Nathaniel Hawthorne]], &quot;{{w|Ethan Brand}}&quot; (1850) originally titled &quot;The Unpardonable Sin&quot; in [[s:The  Snow Image|''The Snow-Image, and Other Twice-Told Tales'']]

*'''''Deus est Diabolus inversus'''''.
:*[[w:Hermeticism|Hermeticism]], [[Kabbalah]], [[w:Theosophical Society|Theosophical Society]]

* '''Why should the devil have all the good tunes?'''
**[[Rowland Hill (preacher)|Rowland Hill]], sermon, reported in Edward W. Broome, ''The Rev. Rowland Hill: Preacher and Wit'' (1881), p. 93, in the sentence: &quot;He did not see any reason why the devil should have all the good tunes&quot;

* Mass movements can rise and spread without [[belief]] in a [[God]], but never without belief in a devil.
** [[Eric Hoffer]], ''The True Believer'' (1951)

* Even a most evil man is better than the devil!
** [[Jan Hus]] in ''Booklet against the Cook-priest'' in response to the rival priest who swore that Hus is worse than any devil. Quoted in ''A Companion to Jan Hus'' (2015) by František Šmahel (ed.), pp. 201-202.

===I===
* We have enslaved the rest of the animal creation, and have treated our distant cousins in fur and feathers so badly that beyond doubt, if they were able to formulate a religion, they would depict the Devil in human form.
** [[William Ralph Inge]], [http://books.google.com/books?id=TbgYAAAAYAAJ&amp;q=Devil+in+human+form &quot;The Idea of Progress&quot;] ([[w:Romanes Lecture|Romanes Lecture]], 27 May 1920), reprinted in ''Outspoken Essays: Second Series'' (1922).

===J===
* Our adversary the devil goes about as a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. 1 Peter 5:8 You make darkness, [[David]] says, and it is night: wherein all the beasts of the forest do creep forth. The young lions roar after their prey and seek their meat from God. The devil looks not for unbelievers, for those who are without, whose flesh the [[Assyrian]] king roasted in the furnace. Jeremiah 29:22 It is the church of Christ that he makes haste to spoil. According to Habakkuk, His food is of the choicest. A [[Job (biblical figure)|Job]] is the victim of his machinations, and after devouring [[Judas]] he seeks power to sift the [other] apostles. Luke 22:31 The Saviour came not to send peace upon the earth but a sword. Matthew 10:34 [[Lucifer]] fell, Lucifer who used to rise at dawn; Isaiah 14:12 and he who was bred up in a paradise of delight had the well-earned sentence passed  upon him, Though thou exalt yourself as the eagle, and though thou set your nest among the stars, thence will I bring you down, says the Lord. Obadiah 4 For he had said in his heart, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God, and I will be like the Most High. Isaiah 14:13-14 Wherefore God says every day to the angels, as they descend the ladder that [[Jacob]] saw in his dream, Genesis 28:12 I have said you are Gods and all of you are children of the Most High. But you shall die like men and fall like one of the princes. The devil fell first, and since God stands in the congregation of the Gods and judges among the Gods, the apostle writes to those who are ceasing to be Gods — Whereas there is among you envying and strife, are you not carnal and walk as men? 1 Corinthians 3:3 
** [[Jerome]], Letter 22, p.4; as qtd. in [http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3001022.htm  &quot;CHURCH FATHERS: Letter 22 (Jerome)&quot;], ''New Advent'', translated by W.H. Fremantle, G. Lewis and W.G. Martley. From Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, Second Series, Vol. 6. Edited by Philip Schaff and Henry Wace. (Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Publishing Co., 1893.) Revised and edited for New Advent by Kevin Knight.

* Job was dear to [[God]], perfect and upright before Him; Job 2:3 yet hear what he says of the devil: His strength is in the loins, and his force is in the navel. &lt;br&gt; The terms are chosen for decency's sake, but the reproductive organs of the two sexes are meant. Thus, the descendant of David, who, according to the promise is to sit upon his throne, is said to come from his loins. And the seventy-five souls descended from [[Jacob]] who entered [[Egypt]] are said to come out of his thigh. Genesis 46:26 So, also, when his thigh shrank after the Lord had wrestled with him, Genesis 32:24-25 he ceased to beget children. The [[Israelites]], again, are told to celebrate the [[passover]] with loins girded and mortified. Exodus 12:11 God says to Job: Gird up your loins as a man. Job 38:3 [[John]] wears a leathern girdle. Matthew 3:4 The apostles must gird their loins to carry the lamps of the Gospel. Luke 12:35 When [[Ezekiel]] tells us how [[Jerusalem]] is found in the plain of wandering, covered with blood, he uses the words: Your navel has not been cut. Ezekiel 16:4-6 In his assaults on men, therefore, the devil's strength is in the loins; in his attacks on women his force is in the navel.
** [[Jerome]], Letter 22, p.11; as qtd. in [http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3001022.htm  &quot;CHURCH FATHERS: Letter 22 (Jerome)&quot;], ''New Advent'', translated by W.H. Fremantle, G. Lewis and W.G. Martley. From Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, Second Series, Vol. 6. Edited by Philip Schaff and Henry Wace. (Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Publishing Co., 1893.) Revised and edited for New Advent by Kevin Knight.

* Now it came to be the day when the sons of the [true] God entered to take their station before [[Jehovah]], and even Satan proceeded to enter right among them. Then Jehovah said to Satan: “Where do you come from?” At that Satan answered Jehovah and said: “From roving about in the earth and from walking about in it.”
** [[Job]], [http://www.jw.org/en/publications/bible/bi12/books/job/1/ Job 1:6-7]

* And war broke out in heaven: [[Michael (archangel)|Mi′cha·el]] and his angels battled with the [[dragon]], and the dragon and its [[angel]]s battled 8 but it did not prevail, neither was a place found for them any longer in heaven. 9 So down the great dragon was hurled, the original [[snake|serpent]], the one called [[Devil]] and [[Satan]], who is misleading the entire inhabited [[earth]]; he was hurled down to the earth, and his angels were hurled down with him. 10 And I heard a loud voice in heaven say:
: “Now have come to pass the salvation and the [[power]] and the [[Kingdom of God|kingdom of our God]] and the authority of his Christ, because the accuser of our brothers has been hurled down, who accuses them day and night before our God!
:* [http://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/1001060069?q=michael&amp;p=par Apocalypse or Revelation of John 12:9-12]

* '''The Devil is an ass, I do acknowledge it.'''
** [[Ben Jonson]], ''The Devil Is an Ass'' (performed 1616; published 1631), Act IV, scene 1

===K===
*The devil's voice is sweet to hear.
** [[Stephen King]], ''Needful Things'' (1991)

* It is stupid of modern civilization to have given up believing in the devil, when he is the only explanation of it.
**[[Ronald Knox]], ''Let Dons Delight'' (1939), Chapter 8

* ''Der Teufel ist ein Optimist, wenn er glaubt, daß er die Menschen schlechter machen kann.''
** '''The devil is an optimist if he thinks he can make people worse than they are.'''
**[[Karl Kraus]], ''Die Fackel'', no. 277/78 (March 31, 1909), translated in [[Thomas Szasz]], ''Anti-Freud: Karl Kraus's Criticism of Psychoanalysis and Psychiatry'' (1970), Chapter 8

===L===
* And now I would ask a strange question: who is the most diligentest bishop and prelate in all England that passeth all the rest in doing his office? I can tell for I know him who it is; I know him well. But now I think I see you listening and hearkening that I should name him. There is one that passeth all the other, and is the most diligent prelate and preacher in all England. And will ye know who it is? I will tell you: it is the devil. He is the most diligent preacher of all other; he is never out of his diocese; he is never from his cure; ye shall never find him unoccupied; he is ever in his parish; he keepeth residence at all times; ye shall never find him out of the way, call for him when you will he is ever at home; the diligentest preacher in all the realm; he is ever at his plough; no lording nor loitering can hinder him; he is ever applying his business, ye shall never find him idle, I warrant you. And his office is to hinder religion, to maintain superstition, to set up idolatry, to teach all kind of [[w:Popery|popery]]. '''He is ready as he can be wished for to set forth his plough; to devise as many ways as can be to deface and obscure [[God]]'s [[glory]]...O that our prelates would be as diligent to sow the corn of good doctrine as Satan is to sow cockle and darnel.'''
**[[Hugh Latimer]], &quot;Sermon on the Plough'&quot;, 29 January 1548. (G. E. Corrie (ed.), ''Sermons by Hugh Latimer, sometime Bishop of Worcester, Martyr, 1555'' (Cambridge University Press, 1844), pp. 70-1)

* It is [[Lucifer]],&lt;br&gt;The son of [[mystery]];&lt;br&gt;And since God suffers him to be,&lt;br&gt;'''He, too, is God's minister,&lt;br&gt;And labors for some good&lt;br&gt;By us not understood.'''
** [[Henry Wadsworth Longfellow]], ''Christus'', ''The Golden Legend'' (1872), Epilogue. Last stanza

* '''Tell your master that if there were as many devils at Worms as tiles on its roofs, I would enter.'''
** [[Martin Luther]] (April 16, 1521). See Bunsen's ''Life of Luther'', p. 61

===M===
* '''Then was [[Jesus]] led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil.''' &lt;br&gt; And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred.&lt;br&gt; And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread.
**[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%204:1-3&amp;version=KJV Gospel of Matthew 4:1-3]

* Again the Devil took him along to an unusually high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. And he said to him: “All these things I will give you if you fall down and do an act of worship to me.”
** [http://wol.jw.org/en/wol/b/r1/lp-e/nwt/E/2013/40/4 Matthew 4: 8-9], [[NWT]]

* The infernal serpent; he it was whose guile,&lt;br&gt;Stirr'd up with envy and revenge, deceived&lt;br&gt;The mother of mankind.
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book I, line 34

* His form had yet not lost&lt;br&gt;All his original brightness, nor appear'd&lt;br&gt;Less than arch-angel ruined, and th' excess&lt;br&gt;Of glory obscured.
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book I, line 591

*  From morn&lt;br&gt;To noon he fell, from noon to dewy eve,&lt;br&gt;A summer's day; and with the setting sun&lt;br&gt;Dropt from the zenith like a falling star.
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book I, line 742

* Satan exalted sat, by merit raised&lt;br&gt;To that bad eminence.
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book II, line 5

* Black it stood as night,&lt;br&gt;Fierce as ten furies, terrible as hell,&lt;br&gt;And shook a dreadful dart; what seem'd his head&lt;br&gt;The likeness of a kingly crown had on.&lt;br&gt;Satan was now at hand.
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book II, line 670.

* '''Incens'd with indignation [[Satan]] stood&lt;br&gt;Unterrified, and like a [[comet]] burn'd''',&lt;br&gt;That fires the length of Ophiucus huge&lt;br&gt;In th' arctic sky, and from his horrid hair&lt;br&gt;Shakes pestilence and war.
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book II, line 707

* '''Abashed the Devil stood,&lt;br&gt;And felt how awful [[goodness]] is, and saw&lt;br&gt;[[Virtue]] in her own shape how lovely; saw&lt;br&gt;And pined his loss.'''
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book IV, line 846

* Satan; so call him now, his former name&lt;br&gt;Is heard no more in [[heaven]].
** [[John Milton]], ''[[Paradise Lost]]'' (1667; 1674), Book V, line 658

* When [[Nietzsche]] said [[God]] is dead, he forgot to mention that Satan died in the same horrific accident.
**[[Grant Morrison]], [http://uk.comics.ign.com/articles/950/950703p4.html UK comics]

===P===
* Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary, the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.
**[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Peter%205:8&amp;version=KJV 1 Peter 5:8]

* The true name for Satan, the Kabalists say, is that of Yahveh reversed; for Satan is not a black god, but the negation of God. The Devil is the personification of Atheism or Idolatry. For the Initiates, this is not a Person, but a Force, created for good but which may serve for evil. It is the instrument of Liberty or Free Will. (p. 102)
** {{W|Albert Pike}}, ''Morals and Dogma of the Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite of Freemasonry'' prepared for the Supreme Council of the Thirty Third Degree for the Southern Jurisdiction of the United States: Charleston, 1871. p.102

* When there is question of saving souls, or preventing greater harm to souls, We feel the courage to treat with the devil in person. 
** Pope [[Pius XI]], speech to the students of the Mondragone college (May 14, 1929); reported as unverified but recounted in Robert A. Graham, ''Vatican Diplomacy'' (1959), p. 351.

===R===
*The [[Inquisition]] was established not just for the persecution of pitiful [[witches]] and [[sorcerers]] (mostly mediums), but for the annihilation of all the differently minded people, and all personal enemies of the representatives of the church, the latter having decided to obtain absolute power... Indeed, the easiest way to destroy the enemy was by accusing him of being in league with the [[devil]]. This devilish psychology the so-called &quot;Guardians of the purity of Christian Principles&quot; attempted to instill into the consciousness of the masses in every possible way.
**[[Helena Roerich]], ''Letters of Helena Roerich Volume I: 1929-1935'', (11 August 1934 )

*Thus, the ignoramuses laugh at the existence of Satan and, by that very fact, they confirm the correctness of the words of one subtle thinker, &quot;The victory of the devil lies in his ability to convince people that he does not exist.&quot;   The irrefutable proofs of the actuality of the other world and the life in it exists in great quantities and are available to many, but the trouble is that the broad masses are very badly informed about this. Besides, the atavism of the Middle Ages still makes many people fear the horns of the devil in every manifestation that is not understandable to them. Likewise, the fires of the Inquisition are still very fresh in the memory of many who suffered from them. Hence, there may be fear in connection with these matters.
**[[Helena Roerich]],  ''Letters of Helena Roerich Volume II: 1935-1939'', (3 December 1937)

*'''T-Bird''': Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is. 
** [[The Crow (1994 film)]] written by David J. Schow and John Shirley, based on [[w:The Crow|The Crow]] by James O'Barr

===S===
*[Diabolus] latrare potest, sollicitare potest; mordere non potest nisi volentem. Non enim cogendo, sed suadendo nocet; nec extorquet a nobis consensum, sed petit.
**[The devil] can bark, he can harass; he cannot bite unless he is willing. For he harms not by coercion, but by persuasion; nor does he extort our consent, but he seeks it.
***Saint [[Augustine of Hippo]], ''Appendix Sermo 37 de Vetere Testamento'' 6, Pl 39, 1820)

*[[w:Martin of Tours|Martin]], resisting the devil firmly, answered him, that by-past sins are cleansed away by the leading of a better life, and that through the mercy of God, those are to be absolved from their sins who have given up their evil ways. The devil saying in opposition to this that such guilty men as those referred to did not come within the pale of pardon, and that no mercy was extended by the Lord to those who had once fallen away, Martin is said to have cried out in words to the following effect: '''“If you, yourself, wretched being, would but desist from attacking mankind, and even, at this period, when the day of judgment is at hand, would only repent of your deeds, I, with a true confidence in the Lord, would promise you the mercy of Christ.”'''
**[[w:Sulpicius Severus|Sulpitius Severus]], [https://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3501.htm ''On the Life of St. Martin''], Chapter 22 

* I charge thee, Satan, hous'd within this man,&lt;br&gt;To yield possession to my holy prayers,&lt;br&gt;And to thy state of darkness hie thee straight;&lt;br&gt;I conjure thee by all the saints in heaven!
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[The Comedy of Errors]]'', Act IV, scene 4, line 67

* '''The devil hath power&lt;br&gt;To assume a pleasing shape.'''
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[Hamlet]]'' (1600-02), Act II, scene 2, line 628

* Nay, then, let the devil wear black, for I'll have a suit of sables.
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[Hamlet]]'' (1600-02), Act III, scene 2, line 136

* '''He will give the devil his due.'''
** [[William Shakespeare]], [[Henry IV, Part 1|''Henry IV'', Part I]] (c. 1597), Act I, scene 2, line 132. Dryden. ''Epilogue to the Duke of Guise''

* '''The prince of [[darkness]] is a gentleman.'''
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[King Lear|King Lear]]'' (1608), Act III, scene 4, line 147. Sir [[John Suckling]], ''The Goblins'', Song, Act III

* '''The devil can cite scripture for his purpose.'''
**[[William Shakespeare]], ''[[The Merchant of Venice]]'' (c. 1597), Act I, scene 3

* Let me say &quot;amen&quot; betimes, lest the devil cross my prayer.
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[The Merchant of Venice]]'' (c. 1597), Act III, scene 1, line 22

* '''The lunatic, the lover and the poet,&lt;br&gt;Are of imagination all compact:&lt;br&gt;One sees more devils than vast hell can hold.'''
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[A Midsummer Night's Dream]]'' (c. 1595-96), Act V, scene 1, line 7

* This is a devil, and no monster; I will leave him; I have no long spoon.
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[The Tempest]]'' (c. 1610-1612), Act II, scene 2, line 101

* What, man! defy the devil: consider, he's an enemy to [[mankind]].
** [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[Twelfth Night]]'' (c. 1601-02), Act III, scene 4, line 107

* [[Satan]] had his companions, fellow devils, to admire and encourage him, but I am solitary and abhorred.
** [[Mary Shelley]], ''[[w:Frankenstein|Frankenstein]]'' (1818), the monster, speaking to Victor Frankenstein in Ch. 15

* '''In the most deeply significant of the legends concerning [[Jesus]], we are told how the devil took him up into a high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the [[world]] in a moment of [[time]]'''; and the devil said unto him: &quot;All this [[power]] will I give unto thee, and the [[glory]] of them, for that is delivered unto me, and to whomsoever I will, I give it. If thou, therefore, wilt worship me, all shall be thine.&quot; '''Jesus, as we know, answered and said &quot;Get thee behind me, [[Satan]]!&quot; And he really meant it; he would have nothing to do with worldly glory, with &quot;temporal power;&quot; he chose the career of a revolutionary agitator, and died the [[death]] of a disturber of the [[peace]].''' And for two or three centuries his church followed in his footsteps, cherishing his proletarian gospel. The early Christians had &quot;all things in common, except women;&quot; they lived as social outcasts, hiding in deserted catacombs, and being thrown to lions and boiled in oil. &lt;br&gt; But the devil is a subtle worm; he does not give up at one defeat, for he knows human nature, and the strength of the forces which battle for him. '''He failed to get Jesus, but he came again, to get Jesus' church.''' He came when, through the power of the new revolutionary idea, the Church had won a position of tremendous power in the decaying Roman Empire; and the subtle worm assumed the guise of no less a person than [[Constantine the Great|the Emperor himself]], suggesting that he should become a convert to the new faith, so that the Church and he might work together for the greater glory of God. '''The bishops and fathers of the Church, ambitious for their organization, fell for this scheme, and Satan went off laughing to himself. He had got everything he had asked from Jesus three hundred years before; he had got the world's greatest religion.'''
** [[Upton Sinclair]], in ''The Profits of Religion : An Essay in Economic Interpretation'' (1918), Book Seven : The Church of the Social Revolution, &quot;Christ and Caesar&quot;.

*Without Satan, with God only, how poor a universe, how trite a music!
** [[Olaf Stapledon]], ''Last Men in London''

*'''Haply yon [[hell]] in mercy, shall be emptied: and you [Satan] shall dwell there alone, with your ministers.'''
**St. [[Ephrem the Syrian]], [https://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3702f.htm ''The Nisibene Hymns''], Hymn 59., 9.

===T===
* '''[[God]] seeks comrades and claims [[love]],&lt;br&gt;The devil seeks [[slaves]] and claims [[obedience]].'''
**[[Rabindranath Tagore]], ''Fireflies'' (1928)

* '''[[Satan|Deity]] is the coincidentia oppositorum, the reconciliation of contraries'''.
:* Theosophy Trust, Great Teachers Series [http://www.theosophytrust.org/311-nicholas-of-cusa], about [[Nicholas of Cusa]]

* We may not pay Satan reverence, for that would be indiscreet, but we can at least respect his talents.
**[[Mark Twain]], &quot;Concerning the Jews&quot;, ''Harper's Magazine'' (September 1899)

* A person [Satan] who has during all time maintained the imposing position of spiritual head of four-fifths of the human race, and political head of the whole of it, must be granted the possession of executive abilities of the loftiest order.
**[[Mark Twain]], &quot;Concerning the Jews&quot;, ''Harper's Magazine'' (September 1899)

===W===
* Don't you know there ain't no devil, there's just [[God]] when he's drunk.
**[[Tom Waits]] ''&quot;Heartattack and Vine&quot;, Heartattack and Vine'' (1980)

===''Isis Unveiled'', [[Helena Blavatsky|H.P. Blavatsky]] (1877)===
&lt;small&gt;[https://www.theosociety.org/pasadena/isis/iu-hp.htm (Full text)],&lt;/small&gt;
*Thus we may infer that '''the only characteristic difference between modern Christianity and the old [[heathen]] faiths is the belief of the former in a personal devil and in hell.''' &quot;The Aryan nations had no devil,&quot; says [[Max Muller]]. &quot;[[w:Pluto (mythology)|Pluto]], though of a sombre character, was a very  respectable personage; and [[w:Loki|Loki]] (the Scandinavian), though a mischievous person, was not a fiend. The [[w:Hel (being)|German Goddess, Hell]], too, like [[w:Proserpina|Proserpine]], had once seen better days. Thus, when the Germans were indoctrinated with the idea of a real devil, the Semitic Seth, Satan or [[Devil|Diabolus]], they treated him in the most good-humored way.&quot; &lt;BR&gt;The same may be said of hell.  [[w:Hades#Realm_of_Hades|Hades]] was quite a different place from our region of [[eternal]] damnation, and might be termed rather an intermediate state of purification. Neither does the Scandinavian [[w:Hel (being)|Hel or Hela]], imply either a state or a place of punishment; for when [[w:Frigg|Frigga]], the grief-stricken mother of [[Baldr|Bal-dur, the white god]], who died and found himself in the dark abodes of the shadows (Hades) sent [[w:Hermóðr|Hermod]], a son of [[Thor]], in quest of her beloved child, the messenger found him in the inexorable region — alas! but still comfortably seated on a rock, and reading a book. The [[w:Norse mythology|Norse]] kingdom of the dead is moreover situated in the higher latitudes of the [[w:Polar regions of Earth|Polar regions]]; it is a cold and cheerless abode, and neither the gelid halls of Hela, nor the occupation of Baldur present the least similitude to the blazing hell of eternal fire and the miserable &quot;damned&quot; [[Sinners|sinners]] with which [[Roman Catholic Church|the Church]] so generously peoples it.  (Part II, Chapter I, p. 10)  

*The Christians were the first to make the existence of Satan a dogma of the Church. And once that she had established it, she had to struggle for over 1,700 years for the repression of a mysterious force which it was her policy to make appear of diabolical origin. Unfortunately, in manifesting itself, this force invariably tends to upset such a belief by the ridiculous discrepancy it presents between the alleged cause and the effects. If the clergy have not over-estimated the real power of  the &quot;Arch-Enemy of God,&quot; it must be confessed that he takes mighty precautions against being recognized as the &quot;Prince of Darkness&quot; who aims at our souls. If modern &quot;spirits&quot; are devils at all, as preached by the clergy, then they can only be those &quot;poor&quot; or &quot;stupid devils&quot; whom [[Max Muller]] describes as appearing so often in the German and Norwegian tales. (Part II, Chapter I)

*Notwithstanding this, '''the clergy fear above all to be forced to relinquish this hold on humanity'''. They are not willing to let us judge of the tree by its fruits, for that might sometimes force them into dangerous dilemmas. They refuse, likewise, to admit, with unprejudiced people, that the phenomena of Spiritualism has unquestionably spiritualized and reclaimed from evil courses many an indomitable [[atheist]] and [[skeptic]]. But, as they confess themselves, '''what is the use in a Pope, if there is no Devil?''' (Part II, Chapter I) (Part Two, Chapter 1)
*And so [[Roman Catholic Church|Rome]] sends her ablest advocates and preachers to the rescue of those perishing in &quot;the bottomless pit.&quot; Rome employs her cleverest writers for this purpose — albeit they all indignantly deny the accusation — and in the preface to every book put forth by the prolific des Mousseaux, the French Tertullian of our century, we find undeniable proofs of the fact. Among other certificates of ecclesiastical approval, every volume is ornamented with the text of a certain original letter addressed to the very pious author by the world-known [[W:Gioacchino Ventura di Raulica|Father Ventura de Raulica]], of Rome. Few are those who have not heard this famous name. It is the name of one of the chief pillars of the Latin Church, the ex-General of the [[W:Theatines|Order of the Theatins]], Consultor of the Sacred Congregation of Rites, Examiner of Bishops, and of the Roman Clergy, etc., etc., etc. This strikingly characteristic document will remain to astonish future generations by its spirit of unsophisticated demonolatry and unblushing sincerity. We translate a fragment verbatim, and by thus helping its circulation hope to merit the blessings of Mother Church:
*''Monsieur and excellent Friend'':
:''The greatest victory of Satan was gained on that day when he succeeded in making himself denied.''
:''To demonstrate the existence of Satan, is to reestablish one of the fundamental dogmas of the Church, which serve as a basis for Christianity, and, without which, Satan would be but a name...''
:''Magic, mesmerism, magnetism, somnambulism, spiritualism, spiritism, hypnotism... are only other names for satanism.''
:''To bring out such a truth and show it in its proper light, is to unmask the enemy; it is to unveil the immense danger of certain practices, reputed innocent; it is to deserve well in the eyes of humanity and of religion.''
:(signed) Father Ventura de Raulica.  (''Les Hauts Phenomenes de la Magie'', p. v., Preface)  quoted by Blavatsky in (Part II, Chapter I)

*[[Anathema|Anathematizing]] every manifestation of [[occult]] nature outside the precincts of the Church, the clergy — notwithstanding proofs to the contrary — call it &quot;the work of Satan,&quot; &quot;the snares of the fallen angels,&quot; who &quot;rush in and out from the bottomless pit,&quot; mentioned by [[John]] in his [[w:kabbalah|kabalistic]] [[Book of Revelation|Revelation]], &quot;from whence arises a smoke as the smoke of a great furnace... Intoxicated by its fumes, around this pit are daily gathering millions of Spiritualists, to worship at 'the Abyss of [[w:Baal|Baal]].' (Part II, Chapter I)

*The blasphemous horrors perpetrated by [[w:Paganism,|Paganism,]] its [[w:phallic worship|phallic worship]], [[w:Thaumaturgy|thaumaturgical]] wonders wrought by Satan, [[w:human sacrifices|human sacrifices]], [[w:incantations|incantations]], [[witchcraft]], [[magic]], and [[sorcery]] are recalled and demonism is confronted with [[spiritualism]] for mutual recognition and identification. Our modern [[w:demonologist|demonologists]] conveniently overlook a few insignificant details, among which is the undeniable presence of [[w:Phallic worship|heathen phallism]] in the Christian symbols.  (Part II, Chapter I)

===''Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations''===
:&lt;small&gt;Quotes reported in ''[[Wikisource:Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations (1922)|Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations]]'' (1922), p. 192-93.&lt;/small&gt;

* '''Renounce the Devil and all his works.'''
** ''Book of Common Prayer'', ''Baptism of Infants''

* Therefore it behooveth hire a full long spoon&lt;br&gt;That shal ete with a feend.
** [[Geoffrey Chaucer]], ''The Squire's Tale'', line 602. Same idea in George Meriton, ''Praise of Yorkshire Ale''. Dekker, ''Batchelars' Banquet'', ''Works'', I. 170. (Grosart's ed). Heywood, ''Proverbs'', Part II, Chapter V. Kemp, ''Nine Days Wonder'' (1600). Marlowe, ''Jew of Malta'', III, IV. ''Comedy of Errors'', IV, III. 64. Tempest, II. 2

* Auch die Kultur, die alle Welt beleckt,&lt;br&gt;Hat auf den Teufel sich erstreckt.
** Culture which smooth the whole world licks,&lt;br&gt;  Also unto the devil sticks.
** [[Johann Wolfgang von Goethe]], ''[[Goethe's Faust|Faust]]'', I. 6. 160

* Nein, nein! Der Teufel ist ein Egoist&lt;br&gt;Und thut nicht leicht um Gottes Willen,&lt;br&gt;Was einem Andern nützlich ist.
** No, no! The devil is an egotist,&lt;br&gt;  And is not apt, without why or wherefore,&lt;br&gt;  &quot;For God's sake,&quot; others to assist.
** [[Johann Wolfgang von Goethe]], ''[[Goethe's Faust|Faust]]'', I. 4. 124

* I call'd the devil, and he came,&lt;br&gt;  And with wonder his form did I closely scan;&lt;br&gt;He is not ugly, and is not lame,&lt;br&gt;  But really a handsome and charming man.&lt;br&gt;A man in the prime of life is the devil,&lt;br&gt;Obliging, a man of the world, and civil;&lt;br&gt;A diplomatist too, well skill'd in debate,&lt;br&gt;He talks quite glibly of church and state.
** [[Heinrich Heine]], ''Pictures of Travels'', ''The Return Home'', No. 37

* '''When the devil drives, needs must.''' (Needs must when the devil drives.)
** [[John Heywood]], ''Johan the Husband''. Proverbs, Chapter VII. Cervantes, ''Don Quixote'', Part I, Book IV, Chapter 4. Gosson, ''Ephemerides of Phialo''. Marlowe, ''Dr. Faustus''. Peele, ''Edward I''. [[William Shakespeare]], ''[[All's Well that Ends Well]]'', I. 3

* '''How art thou fallen from heaven, O [[Lucifer]], son of the morning!'''
** Isaiah, XIV. 12

* What is got over the devil's back is spent under his belly.
** Attributed to Isocrates by [[Alain-René Lesage]], ''Gil Blas'' (1715-1735), Book III, Chapter X

* Resist the Devil, and he will flee from you.
** James, IV. 7

* The king of terrors.
** Job, XVIII. 14

* The devil, my friends, is a woman just now.&lt;br&gt;'Tis a woman that reigns in Hell.
** [[Owen Meredith]] (Lord Lytton), ''News''

* Swings the scaly horror of his folded tail.
** [[John Milton]], ''Hymn on Christ's Nativity'', line 172

* Bid the Devil take the slowest.
** [[Matthew Prior]], ''On the Taking of Namur''

* ''Verflucht wer mit dem Teufel spielt.''
** Accursed be he who plays with the devil.
** [[Friedrich Schiller]], ''Wallenstein's Tod'', 1. 3. 64

* From his brimstone bed, at break of day,&lt;br&gt;  A-walking the Devil is gone,&lt;br&gt;To look at his little snug farm of the world,&lt;br&gt;  And see how his stock went on.
** [[Robert Southey]] and [[Samuel Taylor Coleridge]], ''The Devil's Walk'', Stanza 1. Title originally ''Devils' Thoughts''. Coleridge assigns to Southey the first four stanzas. See his Sibylline Leaves. (1817), p. 98. Claim of Porson a hoax.

* The Satanic school.
** [[Robert Southey]], ''Vision of Judgment'', Original Preface, III

* The bane of all that dread the Devil!
** [[William Wordsworth]], ''The Idiot Boy'', Stanza 67

==See also ==
* [[Demon]]
* [[Demonic possession]]
* [[Lucifer]]
* [[Satan]]

==External links==
*{{wikipedia-inline}}
*{{wiktionary-inline|devil}}
*{{Commonscat-inline|Devils}}

[[Category:Demons]]</text>
      <sha1>tq8v1r0o3966umlg47xynikx3ncelv7</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Cars 2</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>128195</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965208</id>
      <parentid>3960639</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:56:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39080-35</username>
        <id>3348580</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965208</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="64586" sha1="33avkcnjwp0gnao3evntda7f4jvtee3" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Cars Logo Black.svg|thumb|The mission begins.]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Cars 2|Cars 2]]''''' is a [[w:2011 in film|2011]] American [[w:Computer-animated film|computer-animated film]] produced by [[w:Pixar|Pixar Animation Studios]] and distributed by [[w:Walt Disney Pictures|Walt Disney Pictures]], and is the sequel to the [[2006 Gaza–Israel conflict|2006]] film, ''[[Cars (film)|Cars]]''. In the film, race car Lightning McQueen (voiced by [[w:Owen Wilson|Owen Wilson]]) and tow truck Mater (voiced by [[w:Larry the Cable Guy|Larry the Cable Guy]]) head to Japan, France, Italy and Britain to compete in the World Grand Prix, but Mater becomes sidetracked with international espionage.
:''Directed by [[w:John Lasseter|John Lasseter]], co-directed by [[w:Brad Lewis|Brad Lewis]]. Written by [[w:Ben Queen|Ben Queen]].''
{{center|'''The mission begins.''' [[#Taglines|taglines]]}}

[[File:Ferrari California (17271659202).jpg|thumb|Really? You are speed? Then Francesco is '''''triple''''' speed. Francesco is ''triple'' ''speed''. Oh-ho! Francesco ''likes''-a this, McQueen. It's-a really getting him into the ''zone!'']]
[[File:Intelligence Community Medal for Valor.PNG|thumb|&quot;Who are you with? FBI? CIA?&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;Let's just say I'm a triple-A affiliated.&quot;]]
[[File:Trabant 601S Universal 1984 I.jpg|thumb|&quot;Fellers, listen, I know what you're goin' through. Everybody's been laughin' at me my whole life too. But becoming powerful and rich beyond your wildest dreams ain't gonna make you feel better.&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;Yeah, but it's worth a shot!&quot;]]

== Dialogue ==
:'''Leland Turbo:''' This is Agent Leland Turbo. I have a flash transmission for Agent Finn McMissile. Finn, my cover's been compromised. Everything's gone pear-shaped. You won't believe what I've found out here. This is bigger than anything we've ever seen. And no one even knows it exists. Finn, I need backup. But don't call the cavalry, it could blow the operation. And be careful! It's not safe out''' here!
:'''Grem:''' ''[from Off-Screen]'' Let's go! ''[alarm went off]''
:'''Leland Turbo:''' Transmitting my grids now. Good luck.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' Where is Finn McMissile?
:'''Leland Turbo:''' ''[last words before he is crushed to death]'' You'll never catch him, he will stop you!
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' We shall see.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Finn has infiltrated an oil platform to rescue Agent Leland Turbo and observes activity from high above]''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[suspiciously]'' What are you up to now, Professor?
:''[Finn shoots his harpoon line forwards which Pearces a balcony platform, them shoots his harpoon line into the wall behind him, then moves forward above the lemons them shoots his harpoon line diagonally, then bends down.
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' ''[speaking to a platform worker lemon]'' This is valuable equipment, make sure it is properly secured for the voyage.
:'''Platform Worker:''' Got it.
:'''Grem:''' Hey Professor Z, this is one of those British spies we told you about.
:'''Acer:''' Yeah, this one we caught sticking his bumper where it didn't belong.
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' Agent Leland Turbo. 
:''[Acer reveals Leland's crushed remains as Finn gasps in horror, but a fire erupts casting a large shadow, revealing his presence as Professor Zündapp looks up to see who it is]''
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' It's Finn McMissile!
:''[Finn starts shooting; The lemons scramble for cover, while others rush up the derrick]''
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' He's seen the camera! '''''KILL HIM!'''''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Grem:''' ''[laughs, thinking he escaped Finn]'' He's dead, Professor.
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' ''Wunderbar!'' With Finn McMissile gone, who can stop us now? 
:''[the scene switches to Mater]''
:'''Mater''': Mater. Tow Mater, that's who, is here to help ya! Hey, Otis!
:'''Otis''': Heh-hey, Mater. I, uh-- Oh, gosh. I'm so sorry. I thought I could make it this time, but-- ''[tries to start his engine, but can't.]'' Smooth like puddin', huh? ''[sighs]'' Who am I kidding? I'll always be a lemon.
:'''Mater''': Well, dad-gum, you're leakin' oil again, must be yer gaskets. Hey, but look on the bright side. This is yer 10th tow this month, so that means it's on the house. 
:'''Otis''': You're the only one that's nice to lemons like me, Mater.
:'''Mater''': Hey, don't sweat it. Shoot, these things happen to everybody, Otis.
:'''Otis''': But you never leak oil!
:'''Mater''': Yeah, but I ain't perfect. Don't tell nobody, but I think my rust is tryna show through.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Luigi:''' Oh Lightning, welcome home!
:'''Flo:''' Good to have you back honey!
:'''Fillmore:''' Congratulations man.
:'''Sarge:''' Welcome home soldier.
:'''Sheriff:''' The place wasn't the same without you son.
:'''Lizzie:''' What? Did he go somewhere?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' It's good to be home everybody. ''[hears Mater Honking His Horn]'' Mater!
:'''Mater:''' McQueen!
:'''Otis:''' Aah!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater!
:'''Mater:''' McQueen!
:'''Otis:''' Oooh!
:''[Mater stops at the crossroad in front of McQueen and lets go of Otis, who is moved along into Ramone's House Of Body Art as Sally and Flo dodge him].''
:'''Otis:''' ''[Stops And Comes Onto Wheel Ramps]'' Whoooa!
:'''Ramone:''' Hey, How far did you make it this time Otis?
:'''Mater:''' Wow, I Can't Believe They Renamed The Piston Cup After Our Very Own Doc Hudson.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' I Know Doc Said [[Cars (film)|These Things Were Just Old Cups]], But To Have Someone Else Win It Just Didn't Feel Right You Know?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mater:''' ''[whistles]'' I'll take one of them. Thank you. Never know which one McQueen will have a hankering for. Hey, whatcha got here that's free? How about that pistachio ice cream?
:'''Sushi Chef:''' No, no. Wasabi.
:'''Mater:''' Oh, same old, same old. What's up with you? ''[looks at the bucket of wasabi again]'' That looks delicious! ''[the chef takes a knife and sets a small piece of wasabi on a tray, then puts it on the counter]'' Uh, a little more, please? ''[the chef adds more wasabi]'' It is free, right? ''[the chef adds more]'' Keep it comin'. A little more. Come on, let's go, it's free! You're gettin' there. Scoop, scoop! ''[the chef gives in and scoops out a baseball-sized serving of wasabi]'' There ya go! Now, '''''that's''''' a scoop of ice cream!
:'''Sushi Chef:''' ''[bowing and speaking in Japanese]'' My condolences.
:'''Miles:''' And now our last competitor: number 95, Lightning McQueen!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Ka-chow! Thank you so much for having us, Sir Axlerod. I really look forward to racing. This is a great opportunity.
:'''Miles:''' Oh, the pleasure is all ours, Lightning. You and your team bring excellence and professionalism to this competition—.
:'''Mater:''' ''[screaming while runs; Miles and Lightning are shocked]'' Someone get me water! Aah! Oh, sweet relief. Sweet relief. ''[Francesco laughs; speaks into the microphone]'' Whatever you do, '''''DO NOT EAT...''''' the free pistachio ice cream. It has '''''turned.''''' ''[echoes]''
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Sir Axlerod, I can explain. This is Mater. He's--
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' No, I know him. This is the bloke that called in to the television show. You're the one I have to thank.
:'''Mater:''' No thank you, This trip has been amazing.
:'''Miles:''' ''[leaks oil and blames it on Mater by telling him off]'' Ah... He's a little excited, isn't he?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[to Mater]'' Mater?
:'''Mater''': But wait, I... Oh, shoot.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater!
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' Has anyone got a towel?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Fiercely]'' Mater, you have to get a hold of yourself; You're making a scene.
:'''Mater:''' But I never leak oil. Never.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[not believing his friend]'' Go take care of yourself right now. ''[As Mater drives off, a forklift and Axlerod notice Lightning, who grins sheepishly]''
:'''Mater''': Coming through. Excuse me. Leaking oil. Where's the bathroom? Thank you. I gotta go. Oh, uh-- Uh-- ''[accidentally enters the ladies' room, and the ladies scream and yell in Japanese]'' Sorry, ladies! ''[?]'' ? ''[?]'' Whoa! What is. ''[?]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' There you are. Where have you been?
:'''Mater:''' What's a &quot;rendezvous&quot;?
:'''Luigi:''' Uh, it's like a date.
:'''Mater:''' A date?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater, what's going on?
:'''Mater:''' Well, what's going on is I got me a date tomorrow.
:'''Guido:''' ''Non ci credo.'' (I don't believe you.)
:'''Luigi:''' Guido don't believe you.
:'''Mater:''' Well, believe it. My new girlfriend just said so. ''[sees Holley and waves]'' Hey, there she is! Hey! Hey, lady! See you tomorrow!
:'''Guido:''' ''Ancora non ci credo.'' (I still don't believe you.)
:'''Luigi:''' Guido still don't believe you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grem:''' I got to admit, you tricked us real good.
:'''Acer:''' And we don't like being tricked. ''[Rod chuckles]'' Hey! What's so funny?
:'''Rod Torque Redline:''' Well you know, I was just wearing a disguise. You guys are stuck looking like that. ''[Grem pushes a lever, turning the magnet off, and causing Rod to land on a small platform, where one of the Lemon Cars pushes a fuel tank of Allinol towards him.]'' Allinol? Thanks, fellas! I hear this stuff is good for you.
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' So you think, Allinol by itself is good for you. ''[presses a button, which causes some cylinders attached to the platform to turn Rod's rear tires and make whirring sounds as his status bar shows his speedometer going up]'' But after microscopic examination, I have found that it has one small weakness. When hit with an electromagnetic pulse, it becomes extremely dangerous.
:'''Grem:''' ''[moves a camera-like EMP generator forward]'' Smile for the camera.
:'''Rod Torque Redline:''' Is that all you want? I got a whole act.
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' You were very interested in this camera on the oil platform, Now you will witness what it really does.
:'''Rod Torque Redline:''' Whatever you say Professor.
:'''Acer:''' ''[as a Pacer comes up with a TV screen showing a picture of Rod with a Japanese pink car while in disguise]'' You talked up a lot of cars last night. Which one's your associate?
:'''Rod Torque Redline:''' Your mother. Oh, no, I'm sorry, it was your sister. You know, I can't tell them apart these days.
:'''Grem:''' Could I start it now, Professor Z?
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' Go 50% power. ''[Grem then pushes a lever beneath the EMP generator that causes the lens to light up and make whirring sounds, going to 50% power]'' camera is actually an electromagnetic pulse emitter.
:'''Acer:''' ''[showing Rod a picture of him with Shigeko]'' What about her? Did you give it to her?
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' The Allinol Is Now Heating To A Boil, Dramatically Expanding, Causing The Engine Block To Crack Under The Stress, Forcing Oil Into The Combustion Chamber.
:''[While Zündapp is talking, Rod's engine is heard cracking, then the oil is heard flowing.]''
:'''Acer:''' ''[showing Rod a picture of him with a Japanese red Ferrari at a sushi stand]'' How about him? Did you talk to him?!
:'''Rod Torque Redline:''' ''[as smoke gets emitted from his tailpipes]'' What do I care?! I can replace an engine *block?*
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' You may be able to, but after full impact of the pulse, ''[as Grem pushes the generator's lever to 75% power]'' unfortunately, there will be nothing to replace.
:'''Acer:''' ''[showing Rod a picture of him With Mater in the bathroom]'' How about him? Does he have it? 
:''[Rod trembles upon seeing the image, which Zündapp then notices and looks at the picture.]''
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' That's him. He's the 1.
:'''Grem:''' Roger that Professor Z.
:'''Rod Torque Redline:''' ''[his last words before he's exploded]'' '''''NO!'''''
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' ''[through cell phone to the Lemon Kingpin]'' Yes, sir. We believe the infiltrator has passed along sensitive information.
:'''Lemon Kingpin:''' ''[through phone]'' Right away!
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' I will take care of it before any damage can be done. ''[hangs up]'' The project is still on schedule. You will find the second agent and kill him. 
:''[Zündapp then pushes the generator's lever to 100% power, which the screen then shows the picture of Rod and Mater, zooming in as a reflection of Rod is shown, shaking as the generator's electromagnetic pulse gets more powerful, before he finally explodes, cut into the screen shows a distant view of Mount Fuji and a Japanese tower while the WGP theme begins]''
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Japan, land of the rising sun, where ancient tradition meets modern technology. Welcome to the inaugural running of the World Grand Prix. I'm Brent Mustangburger, here with racing legends Darrell Cartrip and David Hobbscap. There's never been a competition like this before. First, Allinol, making its debut tonight as the required fuel for all these great champions. Second, the course itself, and it's like nothing we've ever seen before. David, how exactly does this competition work?
:'''David Hobbscap:''' Well Brent, all three of these street courses are classic round-the-house racetracks. ''[the camera shows the labeled in Japan, Italy and England]'' This means that the LMP and Formula cars should break out of the gate in spectacular fashion. Look for Francesco Bernoulli in particular to lead early. And with a series of technical turns throughout GT and Touring cars like Spain's Miguel Camino should make up some ground but I doubt it'll be enough to stop Francesco from absolutely running away with it.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' Whoa, now just hold your horsepower. You're forgetting the most important factor here: that early dirt track section of the course! The dirt is supposed to be the great equalizer in this race.
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' French Rally Car Raoul ÇaRoule Is Counting On A Big Boost Headed Through There.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' And Don't Forget Lightning McQueen, His Mentor The Hudson Hornet Was One Of The Greatest Dirt Track Races Of All Time In My Opinion, McQueen Is The Best All Round Racer In This Competition.
:'''David Hobbscap:''' Really Darrell, I think you need to clean your windshield. You're clearly not seeing this for what it is: Francesco's race to lose. ''[The WGP racers roll into the starting line to prepare to race.]''
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' It's time for find out. The racers are locking into the grid.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[closes his eyes as a pre-race ritual]'' Speed. I am speed.
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' ''[laughs mockingly]'' Really? You are speed? Then Francesco is triple speed. ''[closes his eyes]'' Francesco is '''''triple speed'''''. Oh-ho! Francesco '''''likes'''''-a this, McQueen. It's-a really getting him into the '''''zone!''''' ''[revs his engine]''
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[complains about Francesco]'' He is '''''so getting beat today.''''' ''[revs his engine; the lights turn from red to green, and the first race is underway]''
:''[One Set Of Red Lights Turns On One-By-One Before Another Set Of Lights Beneath It Turns Green, The Races Start The First Lap With Raoul ÇaRoule &amp; Miguel Camino Leading Through The Narrow Streets Of Tokyo Before Raoul Gets Overtaken By Max Schnell, Carla Veloso, &amp; Miguel Gets Overtaken By Jeff Gorvette, Shu Todoroki, Lightning McQueen, Francesco Bernoulli, Nigel Gearsley, Lewis Hamilton, &amp; Rip Clutchgoneski Behind Him As McQueen &amp; Francesco Make Their Moves Around Jeff, Carla, Raoul, &amp; Max Which Francesco Takes The Lead With McQueen And Go Around The First Corner].''
:'''John Lassetire:''' Jeff, Your Tires Are.
:'''Bruno Motoreau:''' ''[Mumbling To Raoul].''
:'''Mach Matsuo:''' ''[Mumbling To Shu].''
:'''Giuseppe Motorosi:''' ''[Mumbling To Francesco].''
:'''Sarge:''' Your Suspension Sets Look Good.
:'''Luigi:''' Tire Pressure Is Excellent!
:'''Fillmore:''' He's Got Plenty Of Fuel.
:'''Mater:''' And He's Awesome.
:'''Crowd:''' ''[Chanting And Clapping]'' McQueen, McQueen, McQueen!
:''[The Screen Shows Finn &amp; Holley Inside A Building Overlooking The Pit Road And Have Their Eyes On Mater, Who Is Wearing A Headset].''
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Why Is He In The Pits, He's So Exposed.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' It's His Cover, One Of The Best I've Seen Too, Look At The Detail On The Rust, It Must Have Cost Him A Fortune.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' ''[Using Her On-Board Computer Dual Trackball Platforms]'' But Why Hasn't He Contacted Us Yet?
:'''Finn McMissile:''' There's Probably Heat On Him: Be Patient.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Right Of Course, He'll Signal Us When He Can.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' And Then We Find Out Who's Behind All This.
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' ''[Announcing]'' As They Head Into The Palace Hairpin, Francesco Builds An Early Lead.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' Ah Hang On Boys, Here Comes The Dirt, Slipping And Sliding Baby.
:'''Mater:''' McQueen, It's Time To Make Your Move, Get On The Outside And Show Them What Doc Taught You.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' 10-4 Mater.
:'''David Hobbscap:''' ''[As Francesco Struggles To Brake On The Dirt]'' Oh Boy, Francesco's Brought To A Screeching Halt!
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' ''[As McQueen Uses Doc's &quot;Turn Right To Go Left&quot; Trick To Overtake Francesco]'' Lightning McQueen Is The First To Take Advantage And Just Like That Folks, Francesco's Lead Is Left In The Dust.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Nice Call Mater, Keep It Up.
:'''Acer:''' It's Finn McMissile! But you're dead!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Then this shouldn't hurt at all. ''[sprays both Acer and Petey with a fire extinguisher, blinding them]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Francesco, Lightning, and Carla are on the podium]''
:'''Photographer:''' Francesco!
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' Francesco, over here. Hey, what was your strategy today?
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' Strategia?! Francesco needs-a no strategy, it’s very simple: You start the race, wait for Lightning McQueen to choke, pass him, then win. Francesco always-a wins, it’s-a boring.
:''[Lightning simply rolls his eyes]''
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' I gotta tell you dude, you were in trouble for a while. That dirt track section had you crawling.
:''[Lightning noticed Mater returning to the pits and sneaks off to go to talk to him]''
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' To truly crush one's dream, you must first raise their hopes very high.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[meets up with Mater in his pit garage]'' Mater!
:'''Mater:''' Hey McQueen! What happened? Is the race over? You won, right?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[sternly]'' Mater, why were you yelling things at me while I was racing?
:'''Mater:''' &quot;Yelling&quot;? Oh, you thought… ''[chuckles]'' That's funny right there. No, see,  that's 'cause I seen these two fellers doing some sort of karate street performance. It was nutso. One of 'em even had a flamethrower.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[With worry in disbelief]'' &quot;A flamethrower&quot;? What are you talking about? I-I don't understand. Where were you?
:'''Mater:''' Going to meet my date.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[confused]'' Your date?
:'''Mater:''' She started talkin' to me as a voice in my head, telling me where to go.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[shocked In enraged]'' '''What?!'''
:'''Mater:''' ''[noticing Lightning's angrilyerish glare]'' Wait a minute. I didn't screw ya up, did I?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[angrily] '''I LOST THE RACE BECAUSE OF YOU!'''''
:'''Mater:''' ''[becomes shocked what his friend just said]'' Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean to.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[refusing to listen to his friend]'' An imaginary girlfriend?! Flamethrowers?! You know, this is exactly why I don't bring you along to these things!
:'''Mater:''' Maybe If I- I don't know. Talk to somebody and explained what happened I could help.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[angrily]'' '''I Don't Need Your Help! I Don't Want Your Help!''' ''[drives off, but is stopped by the paparazzi and Mater is left heartbroken]''
:'''Reporter #1:''' Hey, there he is!
:'''Reporter #2:''' McQueen, you had it in the bag!
:'''Reporter #3:''' Yeah, what happened?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' I-I made a mistake, but I can assure you, it won't happen again.
:''[Mater sadly walks over to the TV monitors]'' 
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' look guys, we know what the problem is and we've taken care of it.
:''[Mater sadly walks away]''
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' ''[on TV]'' Lightning McQueen loses in the last lap to Francesco Bernoulli in the first race of the World Grand Prix. And three, count 'em, three cars flamed out, leaving some to suggest that their fuel, Allinol, might be to blame.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' ''[interviewed]'' Allinol is Safe! Alternative fuel is safe! There is no way my fuel caused these cars to flame out.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' Well, the jury may still be out on whether Allinol caused these accidents, but one thing's for sure: Lightning McQueen blew this race!
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Team McQueen can't be happy right now.
:''[The scene changes to a poster of Team McQueen at the airport as Mater sadly look at it and moves away with the 95 sticker that was on his side is shown to have been removed and moves to get ready to board the plane, Grem &amp; Acer are shown nearby spot him and look at each other with serious looks, a blue car with no tires tries to go through the metal detector, but the buzzer goes off so he reverse to looked at as Mater joins the queue, Finn disguised as a security officer and rolls up to him].''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[wearing an airport security disguise, finds Mater at the security screening processes, speaks Japanese]'' Come with me please sir.
:'''Mater:''' But I'm gonna miss my plane.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Right This Way.
:'''Mater:''' Ah, doggone it. This is about my hook, ain't it? I know I should have checked it, but I can't really. ''[they go into the waiting room]'' Look, It's attached to me. ''[Finn takes off his disguise]''  Hey I Know You, You're That Feller From The Karate Demonstration.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' I Never Properly Introduced Myself, Finn McMissile: British Intelligence.
:'''Mater:''' Tow Mater, Average Intelligence.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Who Are You With, FBI, CIA?
:'''Mater:''' Let's Just Say I'm Triple AAA Affiiated, You Know I Know Some Karate, I Don't Wanna Brag Or Nutting, But I Got Me A Black Fan Belt, Hey You Wanna See Some Moves I Made Up?
:'''Finn McMissile:''' You're being followed.
:'''Mater:''' This First One I Can Reach Into A Car's Hood, Pull Out His Battery And Show It To Him Before He Stalls; I Call It, &quot;What I Accidentally Did To My Friend Luigi Once.&quot; ''[does some karate moves, crushing an oil can]'' Hey! Hi-yah-pah! Hi-yah!
:'''Grem:''' There he is!
:'''Mater:''' Hi-hi-tah! Huh! ''[realizes]'' Look, I probably ought to go. I'm about to miss my flight.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[Grabbing Mater By His Grappling Hooks]'' Don't Worry, I've Taken Care Of That.
:'''Mater:''' ''[Being Pulled]'' Whoa!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[Jumps Through The Hole]'' Hang On!
:'''Acer:''' ''[Grunts].''
:'''Mater:''' Whoa-Hah-Hah! This Is First-Class Service, You Don't Even Have To Go Through The Terminal!
:'''Ucchi:''' ''[Speaks In Japanese].''
:'''Mater:''' Your Karate Partners Is Back There, They Kinda Look Like They Trying To Catch Up!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Drive Forward, Whatever You Do Don't Stop! ''[Spins Around, Making Mater Go Farward].''
:'''Mater:''' ''[As Everett As A Passenger Plane Heads Towards Them]'' Whoa!
:'''Everett:''' Whoa!
:''[Mater Zigzags Around Everett's Wheels, Gram Dodges Him And Prepares To Shoot A Missile As Finn Releases A Wheeled Motorized Jack, Which Comes To Him And Lifts Him Up At An Angle].''
:'''Grem:''' Whoa... ''[Releases His Missile Before Being Tripped Over]'' Aah!
:''[Seeing That Missile Is Heading Towards Them As Finn Releases Another At It, Causing The Two Missiles To Explode From Behind Them].''
:'''Mater:''' Is Everything Okay Back There?
:'''Siddeley:''' Finn, it's Sid, I'm on approach.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[Through The Radio]'' Roger that.
:''[Acer Is Shown Pulling Flatbed Trolleys Of Baggage Across The Runway, Blocking Their Path].''
:'''Mater:''' Member That Whole Thing About Me Not Stopping No Matter What?
:''[Siddeley Appears And Shoots Bullets At The Flatbed Trolleys To Make Some Of Them Go Up Into The Air And Clear The Path].''
:'''Mater:''' I Knew I Shoulda Done Carry-On!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[To Siddeley]'' Thanks Old Boy.
:'''Siddeley:''' ''[Lands On The Runway But Still Moving And Opens His Back Ramp]'' You Got It Mate.
:'''Mater:''' ''[Seeing Holley Inside]'' Hey Doggonit Look It's My Imaginary Girlfriend!
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Come On Get In Here!
:'''Mater:''' I Tell You What, You Really Do Want This First Date Don't Ya? ''[Holley Watches With A Shocked Face]'' There's A No-Quit Attitude Right There. ''[The Gunshots Are Seen Beside Them]'' What The...?
:''[Acer Is Chasing Them And Tries To Shoot At Them With One Of The Bullets Deflates One Of Siddeley's Tires].''
:'''Siddeley:''' ''[Being Turned To The Left And Across The Grass]'' Aargh!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Hold On Sid!
:''[Siddeley Turns Onto The Grass As Mater &amp; Finn Follow With Acer Hot On Their Trails, Who Goes Into Another Runaway As Finn Fires Back At Acer By Hitting One Of His Tires, Causing Him To Turn Right].''
:'''Acer:''' Aargh!
:''[He Fly Up A Terminal Ramp Truck And Past Two Waitresses Inside The Plane And Land On The Fuel Truck's Tank].''
:'''Siddeley:''' ''[Goes Through Some The Barriers By Knocking Them Down]'' Come On Finn, It's Now Or Never!
:''[Finn Spins Around So That He Is Going Forwards].''
:'''Mater:''' Whoa!
:'''Siddeley:''' ''[Takes Off Just Before He Can Hit The Barriers]'' Hold On!
:'''Mater:''' ''[Through Text On A Letter]'' By The Time You Read This, I Will Be Safely On An Airplane Flying Home, I'm So Sorry For What I Did.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Reading The Letter]'' &quot;I Don't Want To Be The Cause Of You Losing Anymore Races, I Want You To Go Prove To The World What I Already Know, That You Are The Greatest Race Car In The Whole Wide World, Your Best Friend Mater.&quot; ''[Looks Up]'' I Didn't Really Want Him To Leave.
:'''Guido:''' ''[Sobs].''
:'''Luigi:''' Wait, There's More Here. ''[Brings Out More Notes]'' &quot;P.S. Please Tell The Hotel, I Didn't Mean To Order That Movie, I Thought It Was Just A Preview And I Didn't Realize I Was Paying For It. ''[Moves The Note Aside To Read The Next One]'' PPS, That's Funny Right There PP. ''[Moves It To See Two Notes With P.P.PS. &amp; P.P.P.P.S]'' There Are A Few More Pages Of PS's Here.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Sighs]'' Well At Least I Know If He's At Home, He'll Be Safe.
:''[Back In The Sky].''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Now That's How I Like To Start The Day, You Never Feel More Alive Than When You're Almost Dead.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Yeah, I Hope That Device Didn't Fall Off.
:'''Mater:''' Whoa Oh-Oh-Oh, That's The Closet I Ever Been To Missing My Flight That Was... ''[Explain s As Holley Pulls The Device Off Him By Her Telescoping Utility Arm]'' Oh!
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' ''[Checking On The Device]'' Still In One Piece Great.
:'''Mater:''' I've Got To Go To A Doctor, I Keep Get These Sharp Pains In My Undercarriage.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Downloading The Photo Now.
:'''Mater:''' Hey Let Me Introduce You Two, This Here Is Finn McSomething Or Other, He's A First-Class VIP Airport Whatchamacallit. And Finn, This Is Here Is My Date. ''[Holley Looks Confused At Mater's Comment]'' I Never Did Get Your Name.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Oh Yes Sorry, It's Shiftwell, Holley Shiftwell.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tomber:''' You Rusty Piece Of Junk, Get Your Dirty Hook Off Me!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[Speaks In French To A Car In The Garage]'' Allez, Maintenant - Vite!
:''[The Car In The Garage Fless As Holley, Mater, &amp; Tomber Enter, Who Angrily Talks In French As Finn Closes The Garage Door So To Keep Anyone From Coming In].''
:'''Tomber:''' ''[Gets Released By Mater]'' Electroshock! Are You Kidding Me?!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Easy Tomber, This Is Her Field Assignment, She Didn't Know You Were My Informant.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Informant?
:'''Tomber:''' A Rookie Huh, I Never Liked New Car Smell.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' ''[Grumbles].''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Tomber Was Doing 20-To-Life In A Moroccan Impound The First Time I Saved Him If I Recall Correctly.
:'''Tomber:''' Speaking Of Recalls, You're Getting Up There In Mileage Aren't You Finn?
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' All Right We Get It, You Both Know Each Other You're Both Old, So Here You Go Informant: Inform Us.
:'''Tomber:''' Beuck, That Is The Worst Moter Ever Made. ''[Gasps]'' Wait, That Oil Filter, Those Wheel Bearings.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Do Those Parts Look Familiar Tomber?
:'''Tomber:''' They Should, I Sold Them.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' To Whom?
:'''Tomber:''' No Idea, He's My Best Customer, But He Always Does His Business Over The Phone, I Was Always Wondering Why He Needs So Many Parts, Now I Know.
:'''Mater:''' Well A Lemon Needs Parts Ain't Nothing Truer Than That.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Lemon?
:'''Mater:''' Yeah You Know, Cars That Don't Ever Work Right, Lemons Is A Tow Truck's Bread And Butter Like 'Em Gremlins &amp; Pacers We Run Into At The Party &amp; The Race &amp; The Airport.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Holley, Pull Up The Pictures From The Oil Platform, I Want To Know What Other Type Of Cars Were Out There.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Right Let's See Um, There Were Hugos &amp; Trunkovs.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Mater, Are These Cars Considered Lemons?
:'''Mater:''' Is The Popmobile Catholic?
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Finn, Everyone Involved In This Plot Is One Of History's Biggest Loser Cars.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' And They're All Taking Their Orders From The Car Behind This Engine.
:'''Tomber:''' Ah, This Explains It!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' What Tomber?
:'''Tomber:''' Gremlin, Pacer, Hugo, &amp; Trunkov Never Get Together, But They Are Having A Secret Meeting In Two Days.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Where's This Meeting Taking Place?
:'''Tomber:''' [[Porto Corsa]], Italy.
:'''Mater:''' That's Where The Next Race Is!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Then There's A Good Chance Our Mystery Engine Will Be There Too.
:'''Tomber:''' Your Chances Are More Than Good, I Just Sent Him A New Clutch Assembly Yesterday To Porto Corsa.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Holley, Contact Stephenson And Have Him Meet Us At Gare De Lyon: Good Work.
:''[Mater &amp; Tomber Smiled And Nodded At Each Other Respectfully, They're On A Electric Bullet Train Named Stevenson Who Sped Through A Snowly Countryside Into A Tunnel And Watch Footage Of Each Lemon With Black Bodyguards Of Their Basis Who Hold Up Other Cars So They Can Past At The Traffic Lights].''
:'''Mater:''' Boy I'll Tell You What That Three-Wheeled Feller Had To Be Right About A Big Meeting, You Never See This Many Lemons In One Town; 'Less There's A Swap Meet Or Something. ''[To Holley]'' Hey, How'd You Get All Them Pictures?
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Well I Remotely Reprogrammed Porto Corsa's Red Light Cameras To Do Recognition Scans.
:'''Mater:''' Wow, Not Only Is You The Purtiest Car I Ever Met, But You The Smartest Too.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Thank You I Think.
:'''Mater:''' ''[Noticing A Blue Tow Truck Towing A Yellow Hugo In The Hugo Group]'' That's A Familiar Sight A Hugo Being Towed, But He Looks Absolutely Perfect!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Of Course, They Must Be The Heads Of The Lemon Families.
:'''Mater:''' Makes Sense If I Was Rich And Broke Down Every Day, I'd Hire Me To Tow Me Around All The Time Too!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' We've Got To Infiltrate That Meeting, It's The Only Way To Find Out Who's Behind All This.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Hang On Minute.
:'''Mater:''' What?
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' ''[Takes A Picture Of Mater]'' Hold Still.
:'''Mater:''' ''[Affected By The Flash Of The Camera]'' Ow!
:''[Holley Connects Her Telescoping Utility Arm Into The Monitor And Moves The Image Of Mater's Front Over The Blue Tow Truck As Well As Making It Turn To Blue, Showing That They Look Similar].''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Ah-Ah, Good Job Miss Shiftwell.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Thank You Finn.
:'''Mater:''' Boy, I Sure Wish My Friends Could See Me Now.
:''[At Luigi &amp; Guido's village in Italy, Uncle Topolino talks to Lightning about his recent tiff with Mater]''
:'''Mama Topolino:''' ''[Speaks In Italian]''
:'''Uncle Topoline:''' She Said You Look Like You Are Starving That She's Gonna Make You A Big Meal And Fatten You Up.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Oh No, Mama Topolino Please, You Don't Have To Make A Fuss.
:'''Uncle Topolino:''' Capisco, I Understand, Is A Problem Yes Between You &amp; A Friend?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' How Did You Know That?
:'''Uncle Topolino:''' A Wise Car Hears One Word And Understands Two That And Luigi Told Me. ''[McQueen Gives A Smug Look]'' While Mama Cooks, Come And Take A Stroll With Me.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' I Brought My Friend Mater Along On The Trip And I Told Him He Needed To Act Different That We Weren't In Radiator Springs.
:'''Uncle Topolino:''' This Mater Is A Close Friend?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' He's My Best Friend.
:'''Uncle Topolino:''' Then Why Would You Ask Him To Be Someone Else?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Thinking For A Moment]'' What Did I Do, I Said Some Things During Our Fight.
:'''Uncle Topolino:''' You know, back when Guido and Luigi used to work for me, they would fight over everything. They fight over what Ferrari was the best Ferrari, which one of them looked more like a Ferrari. There were even some non-Ferrari fights. So, tell me them, ''va bene''! It's okay to fight. Everybody fights now and then, especially best friends. But you gotta make up fast. No fight more important than friendship. ''Chi trova un'amico, trova un tesoro.''
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' What does that mean?
:'''Mama Topolino:''' Whoever finds a friend, finds a treasure. Now mangia, eat!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Stephenson:''' Finn, one hour to Porto Corsa.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[as Mater's siren light is fitted]'' Thank you Stephenson.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Yeah, I think that should just about do it.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Perfect.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' So Mater, it's voice-activated. But, you know, everything's voice-activated these days.
:'''Mater:''' What? I thought you was supposed to be making me a disguise.
:'''Computer:''' Voice recognized. Disguise program initiated. ''[changes Mater to look like Ivan]''
:'''Mater:''' ''[chuckles]'' Cool! Hey, Computer, make me a German truck.
:'''Computer:''' Request acknowledged. ''[changes Mater to his normal self, wearing lederhosen]''
:'''Mater:''' Check it out! I'm wearing Mater-hosen. Make me a monster truck!
:'''Computer:''' Request acknowledged. ''[changes Mater into a Count Dracula truck]''
:'''Mater:''' What the--? ''[imitating Dracula]'' Ha-ha-ha! I vant to siphon your gas! ''[normal voice]'' Ha-ha! Now make me a taco truck!
:'''Computer:''' Request acknowledged. ''[changes Mater into a taco truck; his horn plays &quot;La Cucaracha&quot;]''
:'''Mater:''' A funny car!
:'''Computer:''' Request acknowledged. ''[changes Mater into a yellow hot rod; he revs his engine]''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[turns Mater back to normal]'' The idea is to keep a ''low'' profile, Mater.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lightning Is Missing Mater At The Race in Italy as the racers gather at the finish line]''
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' You Are Looking Live At Beautiful Porto Corsa Italy On The Italian Riviera, What A Magnificent Setting For The Second Race Of The World Grand Prix!
:'''David Hobbscap:''' Well Brent, They Call This Place The Gem Of The Riviera And It's Easy To See Why With Its Secluded Beaches And Opulent Casinos, Porto Corsa Truly Is A Playground For The Wealthy And Everyone Who's Anyone Is Here Today From The Ultra-Rich And Super-Famous To World Leaders And Important Dignitaries.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' You Aren't Kidding David, You Can't Do A Three-Point Turn Around Here Without Bumping Into Some Celebrity!
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Welcome Everyone To The Second Race Of The World Grand Prix Where The Big News Continues To Be Allinol, Sir Miles Axlerod Spoke To The Press Earlier Today To Answer Questions About Its Safety.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' ''[Being Interviewed]'' An Independent Panel Of Scientists Has Determined That Allinol Is Completely Safe Okay: Safe; There It Is.
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' So The Race Will Go On Folks.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' But The Question Everyone Is Asking: Will The Real Lightning McQueen Show Up Today?
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Well He'd Better, Talk About A Home Track Advantage, Francesco Bernoulli Grew Up Racing On This Course.
:'''Italian Announcer:''' ''[As The Races Line Up On The Grid]'' Signore E Signori In The Pole Position, Numero Uno, Francesco!
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' Bellissima, Thank You For Your Support And Your Big Mistake McQueen!
:'''Italian Announcer:''' ''[As The Pop Is Shown Attending The Race With His Bodyguards]'' In Secondo Position, Numero 95, Lightning-A McQueen-A!
:'''Luigi:''' ''[Seeing That McQueen Feels Sad]'' McQueen, Is Everything OK?
:'''Fillmore:''' If You're Worried About Your Fuel Man Don't, It's Perfectly Safe.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' No Guys, I Just Really Wish Mater Were Here.
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' ''[notices Lightning is sad]'' Francesco Understands This McQueen.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[sarcastically]'' Oh Great Here It Comes, What Do You Got Francesco?
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' For Famous Race Cars Like Francesco And Well You To Be Far Away From Home Is Not Easy.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[sarcastically]'' I Think You Forgot The Insulting Part Of That Insult.
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' ''[emotionally]'' It's-a no insult! When Francesco is away from home, he misses his mama. Just like-a you miss your tow truck, amigo.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[impressed]'' Gee, I maybe misjudged you, because that's exactly how I--
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' ''[smiling]'' Of course. I am at home, and my mama is right here. ''[points and waves at a vintage Ferrari in the crowd who is smiling, blowing kisses and waving back]'' Mama! Don't worry, Mama! McQueen is very sad. I will beat his cry-baby bottom today!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[sarcastically]'' And there's the insult we were missing. ''Grazie!''
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Darrell, The Races Are Settling As They Head To The Italian Countryside.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' Whoo Boy, This Is Gonna Be A Great Race.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Miles, a.k.a. the Lemon Kingpin, assembles his cohorts during the penultimate World Grand Prix race]''
:'''Miles:''' ''[in a deep disguised voice]'' Welcome, everyone. I wish I could be with you on this very special day, but... my clutch assembly broke. You know how it is.
:'''Tubbs Pacer:''' Been there.
:'''J. Curby''': Forget about it.
:'''Vladimir''': We know how you feel.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Descramble that voice.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' I'm trying. Oh, it's too sophisticated!
:'''Miles''': We are here to celebrate. Today, all your hard work pays off. The world turned their backs on cars like us. They stopped manufacturing us, stopped making our parts. The only thing they haven't stopped doing is laughing at us. They've called us terrible names: jalopy, rust bucket, heap, clunker, junker, beater, wreck, rattletrap, lemon. But their insults just give us strength. Because today, my friends, that... all... ends! ''[Carla Veloso blown engine]''
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' We're smoke! Where the casino bridge!
:'''David Hobbscap:''' Oh No!
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' ''[worried]'' It's Carla Veloso the Brazilian racecar!
:''[Carla Spins Around And Bumps Off The Side Of The Bridge As Finn &amp; Holley Saw This From Afar].''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' What just happened.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' I'm working on it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[On TV]'' Crashes Are A Part Of Racing I Know, But Something Like That Should Never Happen.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' ''[On TV]'' They're Letting You Choose Your Fuel For The Final Race, Do You Have Any Idea What It's Gonna Be?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[On TV]'' Allinol.
:'''Lemons:''' ''[Gasps]'' What?!
:'''J. Curby Gremlin:''' Did He Just Say Allinol?!
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' ''[On TV]'' After Today?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[On TV]'' My Friend Fillmore Says The Fuel's Safe, That's Good Enough For Me, I Didn't Stand By A Friend Of Mine Recently, I'm Not Gonna Make The Same Mistake Twice.
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' ''[On TV]'' So A Surprising Revelation From Lightning McQueen, He Will Use Allinol In The Final Race Despite What Occurred Today.
:'''Lemon Kingpin:''' ''[Through The Telephone]'' Till Lightning McQueen Is Dead!
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' Of Course. ''[The Phone Call Ends]'' Allinol Must Be Finished For Good. McQueen Cannot Win The Last Race. Lightning McQueen Must Be Killed!
:'''Mater:''' No!
:''[Mater Bumps Into A TV Which Breaks His Special Siren Light, He Turns Into All The Silly Disguises And Turns Normal].''
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' '''''It's The American Spy!!!'''''
:''[The Lemons Aim Guns At Him].''
:'''Mater:''' Dad-Gum!
:'''Computer:''' ''[Gets The Gatling Guns Out Of Mater's Bodywork]'' Gatling Gun: Request Acknowledged.
:'''Mater:''' Let Me Go!
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' You Actually Care About That Race Car: A Pity You Didn't Warn Him In Time.
:''[The Transport Vehicle's Door Shuts, Trapping Mater Inside And Blacks Him Out With Sleeping Gas].''
:'''Mater:''' ''[From Off-Screen]'' Idiot, Is That How You See Me?
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[From Off-Screen]'' That's How Everyone Sees You, I Tell You That's The Genius Of It, No One Realizes They're Being Fooled Because They're Too Busy Laughing At The Fool... ''[Echoes].''
:''[Mater Opens The Door Like Gates Of Heaven, The First Flashback In Crowd In Tokyo, Japan].''
:'''Mater:''' ''[Been Leaked On The Stage]'' But I Never Leak Oil Never!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater, You Have To Get A Hold Of Yourself You're Making A Scene!
:''[At The Sixth Flashback...]''
:'''Mater:''' ''[Noticed His Friend's Angry Glare]'' Wait A Minute, I Didn't Screw Ya Up Did I?
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Angrily]'' '''''&lt;big&gt;I LOST THE RACE BECAUSE OF YOU!!&lt;/big&gt;'''''
:'''Mater:''' Maybe If I Talked To Somebody–
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Angrily]'' '''I Don't Need Your Help! I Don't Want Your Help!''' ''[Echoes].''
:''[Mater Sadly Lowers His Head And Hears The Words Echoed Around Him].''
:'''Mater:''' ''[Banging The Gong As Random Cars Laugh]'' Bang The Gong: Get It On!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Voice]'' Listen, This Isn't Radiator Springs, This Is Exactly Why I Don't Bring You Along To These Things!
:''[Mater's Eyes Are Filled In Terror And Watches This, He Wakes Up To See He's Tied Up Above Cogs As A Bell Chimes And Finds Himself In A Room Full Of Cogs And Looks To See Tied Up Dangling Next To Him With Finn &amp; Holley Tied Up In The Gears' Teeth].''
:'''Mater:''' Holley! Finn! Where Are We?
:'''Finn McMissile:''' We're In [[London]] Mater, Inside Big Bentley.
:''[The Camera Zooms Out To Show The Outside Of The Great Elizabeth Tower Where Big Bentley Is With The Clock Saying 3 O'Clock In The Afternoon, The Changes Shot To Show The Tower Next To The Houses Of Parliament As The Ropes Holding Mater &amp; The Cages Unwind].''
:'''Mater:''' Oh This, This Is All My Fault.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Don't Be A Fool Mater.
:'''Mater:''' But I Am Remember, You Said So.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Where Did I; Oh; Mater, I Was Complimenting You On What A Good Spy You Are.
:'''Mater:''' ''[In A Shout That Echoes]'' '''&lt;big&gt;I'M NOT A SPY!!!!&lt;/big&gt;''' ''[Voice Echoes As Finn &amp; Holley Feels Completely In Shocked]'' I've Been Trying To Tell You That The Whole Time, I Really Am Just A Tow Truck.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Finn, He's Not Joking.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' I Know.
:'''Mater:''' You Were Right Finn, I'm A Fool And What's Happened To McQueen Is 'Cause I'm Such A Big One: This Is All My Fault.
:''[They Notice Grem &amp; Acer Arrive In An Elevator].''
:'''Grem:''' ''[To Mater, Holley and Finn]'' Good, You're Up.
:'''Acer:''' And Just In Time.
:'''Grem:''' ''[Uncovers The EMP Generator]'' Professor Z Wanted You To Have A Front-Row Seat For The Death Of Lightning McQueen.
:'''Mater:''' He's Still Alive?
:'''Acer:''' Not For Much Longer.
:'''Sally Carrera:''' We Came As Soon As You Called.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' I Called To Talk To Mater, It Never Occurred To Me That He Wouldn't Be There.
:'''Ramone:''' Sheriff Is Talking To Scotland Yard Right Now.
:'''Flo:''' And Sarge Is In Touch With His Friends In The British Military.
:'''Sally Carrera:''' You Just Need To Focus On The Race.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' I know but, Sally  everything with going on I'm not sure... Sir Axlerod.
:''[At the third and final race in London, Grem has the E.M.P. ray aimed at Lightning]''
:'''Grem:''' Here he comes.
:''[Mater watches horrified as Grem starts the Emitter at 100% power. The Emitter's red light glows brightly. The Emitter continues to aim at Lightning, but nothing happens to him and continues racing]''
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' What happened?
:'''Grem:''' I don't know, Professor.
:'''Acer:''' What did you do.
:'''Grem:''' I didn't do nothing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[Through The Radio]'' Mater!
:'''Mater:''' Finn, You're OK!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Listen To Me, The Bomb Is On You, They Know You'd Try To Help McQueen, When We Were Knocked Out They Planned It In Your Air Filter!
:'''Mater:''' Uh-Oh.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' ''[Coming Down The Pit Lane]'' Mater, There You Are!
:'''Mater:''' Stop Right There!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Oh Man, I've Been So Worried About You!
:'''Mater:''' Don't Come Any Closer!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Are You OK?
:'''Mater:''' ''[Reverses Out Of The Pit Lane Into The Racetrack]'' No I'm Not OK, Stay Away From Me!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' No Wait, Wait!
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Hold Everything, A Tow Truck Has Just Raced Onto The Track And He's Driving Backwards!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater Wait!
:'''David Hobbscap:''' Normally An Emergency Vehicle On The Track Means There's Been An Accident.
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' Wait Wait, Lightning McQueen Is Chasing Him!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater Wait!
:'''Mater:''' ''[Drives Around The Victoria Memorial]'' Stay Back, If You Get Close To Me You're Going To Get Hurt Real Bad!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' I Know I Made You Feel That Way Before, But None Of That Matters Because We're Best Friends!
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' And McQueen Seems To Be Having A Conversation With The Tow Truck.
:'''Darrell Cartrip:''' I Don't Know Who That Truck Is Brent, But I'll Tell You What, He's Got To Be The World's Best Backwards Driver.
:'''Mater:''' McQueen, You Don't Get It, I'm The Bomb!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Yes Mater, You Are The Bomb, That's What I'm Trying To Say Here, You've Always Been The Bomb And You'll Always Be The Bomb!
:'''Mater:''' Stay Away!
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' No, Never!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brent Mustangburger:''' And Lightning McQueen Just Blasted Away, Hooked To The Now Rocket-Propelled Tow Truck.
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Holley, I'll get Zündapp, you help Mater!
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Got it!
:''[Holley flies right on top of Francesco, disorienting him].''
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' '''''WHAT IS HAPPENING?!'''''
:''[Professor Z Zooms Through The Streets And Passes Through The Traffic And Raced Towards The Tower Bridge Where Tony Trihull Is Waiting For Him At The River Thames].''
:'''Tony Trihull:''' Hurry Professor!
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' Aah!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[to Professor Zündapp]'' Ha! Do you really think, I'm goin' to let you float away, Professor?!
:'''Mater''': McQueen, let go!
:'''Lightning''': Never!
:'''Blue Gremlin''': ''[via headset]'' Hey they're coming your way.
:'''Grem''': Let's go. 
:'''Professor Zündapp:''' Give it up, McMissile! ''[But, like any other hero, Finn refuses to give up and launches bombs at Tony, who looks at them in horror. The bombs then explode massively, killing and destroying Tony once and for all, and Professor Zündapp is captured by Finn. Holley is then seen catching up to Lightning and Mater.]''
:'''Holley''': Mater, stop!
:'''Mater''': No way! You could get hurt.
:'''Holley''': ''[gasps; sees Grem and Acer heading towards Lightning and Mater with guns drawn]'' Oh, no. ''[She bumps into Grem and Acer]'' 
:'''Acer &amp; Grem:''' '''AAH!'''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Holley Shiftwell''': Mater, we've gotta get that bomb off you.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Bomb?
:'''Mater:''' ''[explains to his friend]'' Yeah, they strapped it to me to kill you as a backup plan.
:'''Lightning McQueen''': Backup plan? Mater, who put a bomb on you? ''[Finn arrives with Professor Zündapp strapped up]''
:'''Professor Zündapp''': ''[to Lightning]'' '''''You.''''' Why didn't my death ray '''''KILL YOU?!'''''
:'''Lightning McQueen''': ''[shocked/flabbergasted]'' Death ray?!
:'''Finn McMissile:''': Turn off the bomb, Zündapp! ''(Now!)''
:'''Professor Zündapp''': Are you all so dense? It's voice-activated. Everything is voice-activated these days.
:'''Mater''': Deactivate! Deactivate!
:'''Bomb Computer''': Voice denied. ''[activates countdown timer for 5:00; Mater gasps in shock]''
:'''Finn McMissile''': ''(Mater, what's wrong?)''
:'''Professor Zündapp''': Oops! ''[scoffs]'' Did I forget to mention it can only be disarmed by the one who activated it?
:'''Holley Shiftwell''': ''[firmly pulls out her taser gun]'' Say it!
:'''Professor Zündapp''': ''[nonchalantly]'' Deactivate.
:'''Bomb Computer''': Voice denied. ''[timer subtracts 1 minute]''
:'''Mater''': ''[alarmed]'' Whoa!
:'''Professor Zündapp''': ''[his last words in the film]'' Oh. I'm not the one who activated it. Would anyone else like to try? ''[gets tazed by Holley and knocked out unconscious]''
:'''Finn McMissile''': ''[smirks]'' You read my mind.
:'''Holley Shiftwell''': Ugh, he was getting on my nerves.
:'''Lightning McQueen''': What do we do?
:'''Victor Hugo''': It's very simple. You blow up. ''[The whole group of lemons surround the four]''
:'''Lightning McQueen''': I'm gonna go out on a limb here - these are the guys that want me dead, correct?
:'''Vladimir''': It's nothing personal.
:'''Mater''': Fellers listen, I know what you're going through. Everybody's been laughing at me my whole life too. But becoming powerful and rich beyond your wildest dreams ain't gonna make you feel better. ''[The lemons seem to take this in]''
:'''J. Curby Gremlin''': ''[deploying his gun]'' Yeah, but it's worth a shot!
:[Red with Sally behind him squirts J. Curby and four gremlins behind a fence, Finn shoots his harpoon line into four Hugos and shoots his grappling hooks upwards slamming the Hugos into each other, Holley deploits her wings taking a pair of the Hugos and slams them into a pair of gremlins, Luigi and Guido split off their tires, immobilizing them]
:'''Guido''': Pitstop!
:[Flo shines her lights on Vladimir temporarily blinding him]
:'''Sheriff''': ''[puts a boot on Vladmir]'' Not today boys!!
:''[Mater yells as he karate hits and slams Ivan, two Hugos, and lasso throws Tubbs Pacer out which Ramone sternly spray paint swipes him in the right eye giving him a bit of pinkeye]
:[Finn, Mater, Lightning, Holley, Sheriff, Luigi, &amp; Guido sternly glare at the remaining lemons and Tubbs Pacer with angered looks]''
:'''Tubbs Pacer''': Retreat!!
:[The remaining lemons and Tubbs Pacer flee the area, but stop when they see Sarge with the British military.]
:'''Sarge''': Thanks for the help, Corporal.
:'''Josh Coolant''': Anything for one of Pops' mates.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Guido''': ''[Tries to unscrew the bomb from Mater's hood, but fails]'' Con questi bullone el cabo il mie chiave non funzionano! ''[frustratingly throws his tool gun towards the ground and walks away]''
:'''Lightning McQueen''': [to Luigi] Wh-What's he saying? What's wrong?
:'''Luigi''': None of his wrenches fit the bolts!
:'''Mater''': ''[looks and then gets a sudden realization]'' I get it. I get it! I know what needs to be done!
:'''Lightning McQueen''': (Really?) Then do it!
:'''Mater''': What? No. I can't do it. Look, nobody takes me seriously. I know that now. This ain't Radiator Springs.
:'''Lightning McQueen''': Yes, it is. Look, you're yourself in Radiator Springs. Be yourself here. And if... if people aren't taking you seriously, then they need to change, not you. I know that now because I was wrong before. Now, you can do this. You're the bomb.
:'''Mater''': ''[starts to feel better]'' Thanks, buddy.
:'''Lightning McQueen''': No, no, no, you're the ''actual'' bomb! Now let's go!
:'''Mater''': Oh, right! Hang on! ''[Lightning hooks up to him and drives away with him]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Mater has delivered Lightning to Buckingham Palace and exposes the bomb to the audience with barely 2 minutes left on the clock, causes a massive scramble]''
:'''Finn McMissile:''' ''[arriving; to the audience]'' Hold your fire! He can't disarm it! Mater, I don't know what you're doing, ''[Holley arrives]'' but stand down now!
:'''Mater''': This ain't nothing at all like Radiator Springs.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Mater, just cut to the chase.
:'''Mater''': Okay. It's ''him!'' ''[points to Miles]''
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' ''What? Me?'' You've got to be crazy.
:'''Mater''': I figured it out when I realized y'all attached this tickin' time bomb with Whitworth bolts, the same bolts that hold together that old British engine from the photograph. Holley, show that picture!
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Okay. ''[shows the holographic photo of the mysterious hood engine]''
:'''Mater''': And then ''I'' remembered what they said about old British engines: &quot;If there ain't no oil under 'em, there ain't no oil (over) in 'em&quot;.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' What is he talking about?
:'''Mater''': It was you leaking oil at the party in Japan. ''You'' just blamed it on me.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' Electric cars don't use oil, you twit!
:'''Mater''': Then ''you're'' fakin' it. ''You'' didn't convert to no electric. ''[Miles realizes that he knows the truth, then backs away]'' When we pop that hood, we gonna see that engine from that picture right there.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' ''[panicking]'' This lorry's crazy! ''He's'' gonna kill us all! ''[backs up to the edge of the stage]'' '''''Stay away!'''''
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' But Sir Axlerod created the race, Mater. Why would ''he'' want to hurt anyone?
:'''Mater:''' To Make Allinol Look Bad So Everybody'd Go Back To Using Oil, I Mean He Said It Himself With That Disgusted Voice.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' &quot;Disguised voice&quot;? What are you talking about? You're nuts, you are!
:'''Prince William:''' This Is Going Nowhere Fast, We Really Should Go Grandmother.
:'''The Queen:''' One Moment, I'd Like To See Where This Is Going.
:''[The bomb's countdown is at 29 seconds]''
:'''Finn McMissile''': Mater, ''he'' created Allinol.
:'''Mater''': Yeah, but what if ''he'' found that huge oil field just as the world was tryna find somethin' else? What if ''he'' came up with Allinol just to make alternative fuel look bad?
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod''': ''[as the bomb's countdown goes from 19 to 18 seconds]'' &quot;What if&quot;? You're basing this on a ''&quot;what if&quot;?!''
:'''Security Guard:''' Okay, that's it.
:'''Another Security Guard:''' Right, lads, clear out! ''[the other guards evacuate, followed by the Queen and the spectators]''
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:'''; Wait, somebody save me! The lorry's crazy! Keep away, you idiot!
:'''Finn McMissile''': ''[shocked]'' ''Mater?!''
:'''Holley Shiftwell''': ''[worried]'' Mater!
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod''': Someone, do something!
:'''Car in Crowd''': ''[alarmed]'' Drive away!
:''[Mater stands his ground, glaring at Miles, while everyone braces for the explosion including Finn Holley and Lightning]''
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod''': You're insane, you are! ''[the bomb counts down at 3 to 2 seconds]'' '''''DEACTIVATE!''''' ''[The bomb's countdown stops at 1 second, then shows the words &quot;Voice Accepted&quot;]''
:'''Bomb Computer''': Bomb deactivated. Have a nice day, Sir Axlerod:).
:''[Mater smiles in satisfaction. The police cruisers surround a shocked Miles, as Mater pops the hood open, revealing the mysterious V-8 engine]''
:'''Finn McMissile''': The engine from the photo.
:'''Holley Shiftwell''': ''[Compares the image]'' It's a perfect match.
:'''Sir Miles Axlerod:''' ''[his last words; still shocked]'' How did the tow truck figure it out? ''[getting escorted away by the police cruisers, offscreen]''
:'''Lightning McQueen''': ''[to Mater]'' It's official. You're coming to all my races from now on.
:'''Mater''': Now you're talking!
:''[they forgivingly bump their tires]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[For his actions, Mater is being knighted by the Queen]''
:'''The Queen:''' I hereby dub thee ''Sir'' Tow Mater.
:''[the crowd cheers and applauds]''
:'''Mater:''' &quot;Sir&quot;? Shoot, you can just call me Mater, Your Majesty. I don't wanna hear none of this &quot;sir&quot; business. By the way, have y'all met each other? Queen, McQueen. McQueen, Queen. McQueen, McMissile. McMissile, McQueen. Queen, McMissile.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mater''': So, there we were, my rocket jets goin' full blast, McQueen hangin' on for dear life, when suddenly, them two nasty lemons come out of nowhere with guns drawn. We was goners. But then, out of nowhere, this beautiful spy car swoops in from the sky to save us.
:'''Minny:''' That's a very entertaining story, young man.
:'''Van:''' Oh, Minny, please. Come on! None of this happened. Rocket jets, flying spy cars--
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' ''[out of nowhere]'' No, you're quite right. ''[landing]'' It does sound a bit far-fetched.
:'''Mater''': Holley! What are you doing here?
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Hello, Mater! It's so good to see you again.
:'''Mater''': Finn!
:'''Finn McMissile:''' Our Satellites Picked Up An Urgent Communiqué.
:'''Luigi''': So, you got-a my email.
:'''Mater''': Oh, man. Y'all is gon' have a great time. Everybody, this here's Finn McMissile. He's a secret agent. Don't tell nobody. And this is Holley Shiftwell. She's--
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' I'm Mater's girlfriend. It's so nice to meet you all.
:''[Guido's jaw drops, his forks hit the ground in shock]''
:'''Luigi:''' ''[smiling]'' Guido believe you now.
:'''Flo:''' ''[Looking At Holley's Dent]'' Whoa Honey, You Got A Nasty Dent There.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Yeah.
:'''Van:''' Was That From When You Swooped In And You Saved Them In London?
:'''Minny:''' Van!
:'''Van:''' What, I'm Just Asking!
:'''Flo:''' Ah Don't You Worry Sweet Pea, My Baby Ramone Can Get That Fixed Up For You In No Time.
:'''Ramone:''' Yeah Sure Thing Man No Problemo, Just Let Me Go Get My Tools.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Oh-No-No, I-I'm Keeping That Dent; It's Way Too Valuable.
:'''Mater:''' ''[Grins].''
:'''Lizzie:''' A Valuable Dent, Oh She's As Crazy As Mater.
:'''Mack:''' Oh Those Two Are Perfect For Each Other.
:'''Lightning McQueen''': You know, there's one thing I still don't get. The bad guys hit me with the beam from the camera, right? So, why didn't I...
:'''Mater''': ''[finishing his friend's question]'' Explode in a fiery inferno?
:'''Lightning McQueen''': Yeah.
:'''Finn McMissile''': We couldn't figure that out, either.
:'''Holley Shiftwell:''' Our investigation proved that Allinol was actually gasoline and Axlerod engineered it so when It got hit by the beam it would explode.
:'''Lightning McQueen''': Wait a second, Fillmore; You said my fuel was safe.
:''[Everyone turns and curiously looks at Fillmore]''
:'''Fillmore''': If you're implying that I switched out that rot-gut excuse for alternative fuel with my all-natural, sustainable, organic biofuel just because I never trusted Axlerod, you're dead wrong, man; It was ''him.'' ''[points to Sarge]''
:'''Sarge''': Once big oil, always big oil... man.
:'''Fillmore''': Tree-hugger.
:''[The Camera Shows On A Banner Saying &quot;Radiator Springs Grand Prix&quot; Before Moving Down To Show Sheriff Slowly Driving Along The Main Road With The World Grand Prix Racers Behind Him With The Spectators Watching Beside Hay Bales Being Used As Barriers].''
:'''Sheriff:''' The Radiator Springs Grand Prix Is About To Begin; All Spectators, Clear The Starting Line.
:'''Lewis Hamilton:''' Man, I Can't Wait To Get Rocking; This Is Gonna Be Wicked!
:'''Jeff Gorvette:''' Yeah, We Should Do This Every Year.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Yeah, I Just Figured We Never Found Out Who The World's Fastest Car Is, Plus No Press No Trophy Just Racing The Way I Like It.
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' Francesco Likes It Like This Too.
:'''Lightning McQueen:''' Francesco, I'd Like You To Meet—
:'''Francesco Bernoulli:''' Signorina Sally, It Is Official, Lightning McQueen Is The Luckiest Car In The World.
:'''Sally Carrera:''' Why Thank You. ''[Chuckles].''
:

== Taglines ==
* Fuel the love.
* Spy it only in theaters June 24, 2011.
* The mission begins.
* From the creators of ''[[Toy Story 3]]''.
* Original score composed by [[w:Michael Giacchino|Michael Giacchino]].
* They're not just racing around the world; they're racing to save the world.

== See also ==
* ''[[Cars (film)|Cars]]''
* ''[[Cars 3]]''

== Cast ==
{{col-begin}}
{{col-3}}
* [[w:Owen Wilson|Owen Wilson]] — [[w:Lightning McQueen|Lightning McQueen]]
* [[w:Larry the Cable Guy|Larry the Cable Guy]] — [[w:Mater (Cars)|Mater]]
* [[w:Michael Caine|Michael Caine]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Finn McMissile|Finn McMissile]]
* [[w:Emily Mortimer|Emily Mortimer]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Holley Shiftwell|Holley Shiftwell]]
* [[w:Eddie Izzard|Eddie Izzard]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Sir Miles Axlerod|Miles Axlerod]]
* [[w:John Turturro|John Turturro]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Francesco Bernoulli|Francesco Bernoulli]]
* [[w:Brent Musburger|Brent Musburger]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Brent Mustangburger|Brent Mustangburger]]
* [[w:Thomas Kretschmann|Thomas Kretschmann]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Professor Zündapp|Professor Zündapp]] 
* [[w:Joe Mantegna|Joe Mantegna]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Grem|Grem]]
* [[w:Peter Jacobson|Peter Jacobson]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Acer|Acer]]
* [[w:Stanley Townsend|Stanley Townsend]] — Victor Hugo
* [[w:Bonnie Hunt|Bonnie Hunt]] — [[w:Sally Carrera|Sally]]
* [[w:Cheech Marin|Cheech Marin]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Ramone|Ramone]]
* [[w:Paul Nakauchi|Paul Nakauchi]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Shu Todoroki|Shu Todoroki]]
* [[w:Jeff Gordon|Jeff Gordon]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Jeff Gorvette|Jeff Gorvette]]
* [[Lewis Hamilton]] — Himself
* [[Darrell Waltrip]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Darrell Cartrip|Darrell Cartrip]]
* [[w:Franco Nero|Franco Nero]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Uncle Topolino|Uncle Topolino]]
* [[w:John Ratzenberger|John Ratzenberger]] — [[w:List of Cars characters#Mack|Mack]]
* [[w:David Hobbs (racing driver)|David Hobbs]] — David Hobbscap
{{col-end}}

== Teaser Trailer ==
:'''Announcer''': The most advanced technology, the most exotic locations, the most dangerous assignments. Next summer, get ready to roll with the world's newest secret agents.
:''[Lightning and Mater are putting red lights around them]''
:'''Lightning McQueen''': Mater?
:'''Mater''': I think we bit off more than we could chew.
:''[the text puts up film's title and Spy it only in theaters June [[2011]]]''

== External Links ==
{{wikipedia}}
*{{imdb title|id=1216475|title=Cars 2}}

{{Cars}}
{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2011 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2011 American animated films]]
[[Category:2010s American animated films]]
[[Category:British computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated action films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:American animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Cars (film)]]
[[Category:Sports films]]
[[Category:Spy films]]
[[Category:American auto racing films]]
[[Category:American sequel films]]
[[Category:Films set in California]]
[[Category:Films set in Arizona]]
[[Category:Films set in Italy]]
[[Category:Films set in London]]
[[Category:Films set in Britain]]
[[Category:Films set in Paris]]
[[Category:Films set in France]]
[[Category:Films set in Tokyo]]
[[Category:Films set in Japan]]
[[Category:Films directed by John Lasseter]]</text>
      <sha1>33avkcnjwp0gnao3evntda7f4jvtee3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Nana (manga)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>129311</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965190</id>
      <parentid>3126570</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T04:54:46Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Priscilla Pearl</username>
        <id>3350184</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965190</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2374" sha1="01qrrqwa28fk73hpz763l1i3i14dlup" xml:space="preserve">'''''[[w:Nana (manga)|Nana]]'''''(''''ナナ''') is a Japanese [[w:shōjo manga|shōjo manga]] series written and illustrated by [[w:Ai Yazawa|Ai Yazawa]], serialized in ''[[w:Cookie (manga)|Cookie]]'' published by [[w:Shueisha|Shueisha]].
{{lit-cleanup|2011-08-24}}

'''Nana &quot;Cat Eyed Queen&quot; Osaki'''

&quot;I always thought that life was about standing your ground, no matter how strong the current was. But going with the flow isn't so bad after all. As long as it takes you forward.&quot;

&quot;Don't just give up, Hachiko. Life is about getting knocked down over and over, but still getting up each time. If you keep getting up, you win.&quot; 

&quot;To love someone, why do you need society's approval and permission?&quot;

&quot;Trapnest means “The trapped Den” Once we enter it, we can’t get out by our own means I thought that that name could only come from a man who love having power over other.&quot;

&quot;Hey Hachi... no matter how much or how often people hurt each other, loving someone is never a waste.&quot;


'''Yasushi &quot;Yasu&quot; Takagi'''

&quot;I feel the same way about all my friends. To me, the exact relationship between me and someone else doesn't matter much.But people want to label everything...so I guess I seem indifferent in that way.&quot;

&quot;Being alone and being lonely are two different things.&quot;

&quot;Instead of trampling in other people's gardens, why don't you make your own flowers grow?&quot;

&quot;That's not for you to decide. She's my guest.&quot;


'''Nana &quot;Hachiko&quot; Komatsu'''

&quot; Cinderella's glass shoe was the perfect size.... so why did it slip off as she ran?- It must have been to attract the attention of Prince Charming.. I don't see any other explanation&quot; 

&quot;I am pissed off at your insensitive inability to understand why I'm pissed off in the first place.&quot; 

&quot;I might cry tomorrow, but I may be smiling the day after. That's enough. That's the way life is. If I don't lose hope - tomorrow will come.�Tomorrow will come if we don't lose hope... I learned that from Nana.�But rainy days still make my cheeks wet with tears, even now. It was pouring, on that rainy day.&quot; 

&quot;What people consider precious is different for everybody.&quot; 

&quot;Nana...how come being happy and making your dreams come true are two different things? Even now, I still don't know why...&quot; 

&quot;I want to be spoiled like a child. Cry to my heart's content. But I can only suppress my feelings..&quot;

[[Category:Manga]]</text>
      <sha1>01qrrqwa28fk73hpz763l1i3i14dlup</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Amazing World of Gumball</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>130413</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965071</id>
      <parentid>3943485</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:52:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965071</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3959" sha1="bd25t83mz9v1cbpgjp60pv9mql1lown" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
:'''Seasons''': [[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 1)|1]]/[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 2)|2]]/[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 3)|3]]/[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 4)|4]]/[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 5)|5]]/[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 6)|6]] | [[The Wonderfully Weird World of Gumball]] | [[The Amazing World of Gumball|Main]]
----
'''''[[w: The Amazing World of Gumball|The Amazing World of Gumball]]''''' (2011–2019) is an animated television series created by Ben Bocquelet for Cartoon Network that was revealed on March 4, 2011 and with first episode aired on May 3, 2011. The series revolves around the lives of 12-year-old Gumball Watterson, a blue cat, and his goldfish best friend—adoptive brother 10-year-old Darwin, who attends middle school in the fictional city of Elmore.

==Seasons==
*[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 1)|1]]
*[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 2)|2]]
*[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 3)|3]]
*[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 4)|4]]
*[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 5)|5]]
*[[The Amazing World of Gumball (season 6)|6]]

==Revival==
*''[[The Wonderfully Weird World of Gumball]]''

==Promos and Bumpers==
===Who is Gumball Watterson?===
:'''Gumball''': So who is Gumball Watterson? Here are some things people have said about me.
:'''Miss Simian''': Gumball!
:'''Carrie''': Is the most—
:'''Anais''': Amazing!
:'''Darwin''': Dude!
:'''Nicole''': Don't have time—
:'''Richard''': To say all the good things—
:'''Mr. Small​​''': About...
:'''Banana Joe''': This!
:'''Anais''': Amazing!
:'''Darwin''': Dude!
:'''Gumball''': So, there you have it...
:''[Gumball leans back too far, however, he falls off the chair.]''

===Go to The Toilet===
:'''Nicole''': Go—
:'''Gumball''': to—
:'''Darwin''': the—
:'''Nicole''': toilet.

:'''Banana Joe''': Gumball—
:'''Gumball''': will—
:'''Nicole''': be—
:'''Tobias''': right—
:'''Gumball''': back.

:'''Richard''': This is got everything we need! Toilet, A— uhhhhhhh...

===Now Back to, GUMBALLLLLLLL!===
:'''Gumball''': Now—
:'''Principal Brown''': Back—
:'''Bobert''': to—
:'''Miss Simian''': &lt;big&gt;'''GUMBALLLLLLLLLLLLLL!'''&lt;/big&gt;
:''[Gumball screams]''

==Cast==
*Gumball Watterson
*Darwin Watterson
*Anais
*Nicole
*Richard
*Tobias Wilson
*Anton
*Penny Fitzgerald
*Bobert
*Teri
*Carmen Verde
*Rocky Robinson
*Banana Joe
*Tina Rex
*Juke
*Idaho
*Masami Yoshida
*Sussie
*Alan Keane
*Carrie Krueger
*Leslie
*Ocho
*Clayton
*Sarah
*Mr. Small
*Hector
*Molly
*Jamie Russo
*Principal Brown
*Larry Needlemeyer
*Lucy Simian
*Rob

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Amazing World of Gumball, The}}
[[Category:2010s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s American surreal comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Computer-animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Flash animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Stop-motion animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Middle school TV shows]]
[[Category:American TV shows with live action and animation]]
[[Category:UK TV shows with live action and animation]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about brothers]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about cats]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about families]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about fish]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about Leporidae]]
[[Category:American TV shows featuring puppetry]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]
[[Category:UK TV shows featuring puppetry]]</text>
      <sha1>bd25t83mz9v1cbpgjp60pv9mql1lown</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Planet 51</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>131725</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965051</id>
      <parentid>3964824</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:56:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-31994-37</username>
        <id>3332129</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Lem */</comment>
      <origin>3965051</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="27432" sha1="n9v8zuhlo3r34ujodqs2ir7d8iz1r03" xml:space="preserve">'''''[[w:Planet 51|Planet 51]]''''' is a 2009 Spanish-American-Canadian animated science fiction/family film about a NASA astronaut sent on a mission to land on a deserted planet and plant the [[w:Flag of the United States|United States Flag]]. Once there, he realizes that the planet is inhabited by green aliens with snail like ears living in a [[w:1950s|1950s]] [[United States of America]] culture. Determined to get back to Earth, he recruits a band of local teenagers to help him get back to his ship without being caught by the Planetary Army. The film stars [[Dwayne Johnson]], [[w:Justin Long|Justin Long]], [[w:Jessica Biel|Jessica Biel]], [[w:Seann William Scott|Seann William Scott]], [[Gary Oldman]] and [[John Cleese]].
:''Directed by Jorge Blanco. Written by [[w:Joe Stillman|Joe Stillman]]''
{{center|'''Something strange is coming to their planet... US!'''[[#Taglines|taglines]] }}

== Lem ==
* ''[During a show at the Planetarium]'' [[Space]]... a [[universe]] of mystery. Well, today, the [[mystery]] will be unveiled. Thanks to [[science]], we know the universe is nearly 500 miles long, and it contains—you're not going to believe this—over 1,000 [[star]]s.
* ''[To a panicked crowd]'' Okay, everyone, everyone, please, listen up. We're not getting eaten, or harvested, or having our brains barbecued. The universe isn't scary. It's really amazing. ''[Crowd stares]'' And don't forget to pick up your planetary yo-yos! ''[picks out a yo-yo and does a trick]'' We've got one for each of you. ''[crowd kids cheers]''
* ''[To Skiff and Eckle after the show]'' You are looking at the new Junior Assistant Curator! High four! ''[Lem and Skiff each&quot; other&quot;]''
* ''[After getting his job]'' Hey, I can see my whole life! A house, a car, two kids, they'll grow up and have kids. They'll come home to visit on holidays.
* ''[Watching Neera and Glar walk in the park with a protesting group; mimicking Glar]'' &quot;Oooh, the cause, man!&quot; ''[Normal voice]'' I'd like to cause him some [[PAIN]]! ''[Hits the telescope, which hits his face; To his three goldfish]'' I don't want to hear a single bubble. ''[The goldfish hold it in and one of them fails]'' Especially you, Bubbles.
* ''[After Chuck's landing]'' Mom, Dad! There is a ship in the-- ''[sees Chuck]''
* Neera, you have to choose. It's either me or Glar. ''[Mimicking Neera]'' Oh, Lem, There is no question. It's you, of course.
* ''[To Chuck as they hide in his bedroom]'' Look, I said I will take you to your flying saucer, okay? Well, there it is! Now leave! ''[looks out the window; sighs]'' I'll get you a blanket and a pillow for the night.
* ''[After several knocks on his door]'' Oh, great. let's just have a ''party''!
* ''[After Neera rejects him]'' Oh, great. This day just keeps getting better and better.
* ''[Sees Chuck on TV, quoting Darth Vader]'' '''SKIFF'''!!!!!!!
* We got to get out of here, ''now''!
* ''[After getting fired]'' Oh, great! Just great! ''Fired''! Say, why don't you harvest my organs, and '''GET IT OVER WITH'''!! ''[Slams door]''
* No! You're making a mistake; he's friendly!
* ''[Sighs]'' No.
* ''[To the crowd]'' Space isn't 500 miles. It's not. It's so much bigger than we could imagine. There is ''billions'' of galaxies, and each [[galaxy]] has ''billions'' of stars! Next to that, our [[planet]] is just -- ''[Pause]'' Excuse me. ''[Leaves the Planetarium]''
* ''[To Grawl]'' I know what you are afraid of... and it is not Chuck. It's not monsters or, or aliens. it's the '''unknown'''. I spent my whole life running from it. And I think, maybe, you have, too. But, I'm ''telling'' you. The unknown isn't something to be afraid of. It can be your best friend. And just when you think that it means the end of everything you know, it's really... just the beginning.
* ''[To soldiers &amp; Kipple as Base 9 is about to blow]'' Wh-Wh-What are you looking at?! '''RUUUUUUN'''!!

== Chuck ==
* ''[He steps on a rubber duck]'' What the...? A duck? ''[sees Neera and Lem's parents staring at him, and gulps]''
* ''[Taking off his helmet]'' I can breathe, [realizes the air is breathable] I can '''breathe'''!
* ''[Thinking of a lie to convince Lem to help]'' But I suppose you could leave me stranded. My wife will have to support the kids. ''11''. We have eleven kids, always hungry. Yeah, yeah, but hey, they'll get by without a father. The important thing here is for you to avoid a ''little trouble''.
* ''[To Rover]'' Hey! A planet full of aliens, and you sent back pictures of rocks?! Bad boy! ''Bad boy''!
* ''[Giving advice on love]'' Why do chicks dig me? Because I'm handsome? Because I'm an astronaut? Yes and yes. But, it's also because of Chuck Baker's three steps to romance: Spot your prey. Make your move. Show no mercy. ''[suavely]'' Hey, baby. I saw you across the bar. Are sparks flying or is this place on '''fire'''.
* ''[A tank pointing at him and Lem]'' '''We better RUN'''!!
* ''[In a room with elderly women holding a tea party; to Lem]'' Let the doctor handle this. ''[Clears throat]'' Ladies, who wants to meet an astronaut? ''[Ladies throws cups at him]'' Ladies, one at a time! I'm on [[Facebook]].
* ''[About the universe]'' There's ''billions'' of galaxies, and in each [[galaxy]] there's ''billions'' of [[stars]]. Next to that, kid, our planets are just... dust in the wind.
* ''[To Lem, while after pretending to release him from his control]'' Kid, I'm going down, anyway. There's no need for you to come with me. Thanks... for everything.
* ''[To Grawl after the chain reaction]'' You're not thinking all of this is my fault, right?
* ''[The teens come to rescue him]'' Guys! This is so Luke Skywalker! ''[Noticing Neera standing next to Lem]'' Uh, by the way. You're not brother and sister, right?
* ''[Last line]'' You're a great planet and your 50s are fine, but gimme a call when you get to the 60s… 'cause ''that's'' gonna be fun!

== Skiff ==
* Totally ridiculous. Brains for ''dinner''? Come on. Brains are for breakfast with cereal and milk. Dinner's organs and eyeballs.
* I love fake-alien-poop day.
* ''[Enters Lem's room]'' I saw the alien last night. I am ''so'' in. I got this guy wrapped around my little finger. Let me tell you, this alien's not so scary. ''[Sees Chuck]'' '''AAAAAHHHHHHHHH'''!!
* ''[Rover curls up on him]'' Awww. It's kind of cute, the way he does that.
* ''[To Chuck]'' If you have to do a number one... ''[places newspapers down on the floor]'' use these papers. If it's a number two, go outside... ''and'' if it's number three... I can't help you.
* ''[To Rover, after he ran away]'' Don't you ''ever'' run off like that! What if they took you to the pound? Where can I find you?
* ''[Rover gets caught]'' Rover? '''NOOOOOOOO'''!
* ''[Rover's taken into the Comic Book Store; sobbing]'' Why did he do it? I was going to teach him to beg and everything!
* My little ''Rovie''! ''[Sobs]'' I can still hear his wagging little antenna! ''[Rover wags his antenna and makes a sound]'' Rover? ''[Turns around]'' Rover?! ROVER, ROVER!! YOU'RE ALIVE!!
* ''[Discovering Base 9]'' This is amazing! I was right again! Woo-hoo!!
* ''[Sees a naked Chuck]'' That is a ''funny'' place for his antenna.

== General Grawl ==
* ''[Repeated line]'' '''Diabolical'''!
* ''[Interrogating Rover]'' WHERE'S YOUR '''MASTER'''?! '''TALK'''!! ''[Rover leaks oil out]''
* All right, lets get these aliens to Base 9. ''[Crowd gasps]'' Not that it exists. ''[Clears throat]''
* '''HOLD YOUR FIRREEEEE'''!!!
* Sick, young lady is helping the enemy of your world! Sick is befriending a creature that's so completely... ''different''! Sick is... '''WELL, LOOK! IT'S RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!!''' I'm sorry, Professor. It is too dangerous to let the alien live another minute.

== Professor Kipple ==
* Aliens are quite like us, except they have two sets of teeth, hyperdermic fingertips, and hypnotic eyes to control our brains and turn us into zombies and destroy our world.
* Remember, ''anyone'' caught helping the aliens will go to jail!
* ''[Investigating Chuck's head]'' What a remarkable brain you must have. An incision here and here, it should pop right out!
* This boy is free!
* ''[To Grawl]'' You clown! He's here to take over our minds, even yours.

== Dialogue ==
:[''First lines'']
:'''Girl''': I've never gone parking before. I'm not really that kind of  girl.
:'''Boy''': Well, I'm not the kind of guy who would go out with &quot;that&quot; kind of girl.
:'''Girl''': Why, that is so sweet... I think.
:'''Boy''': There is nothing to be afraid of.
:[''Alien craft rears up in front of them'']
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Eckle's Mother''': What did I tell you about these kind of movies?
:'''Eckle''': It was almost over! Besides they're all the same.
:'''Eckle's Mother''': That's not true.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Skiff''': [''Looking at a movie poster''] There it is. Just two more days.
:'''Eckle''': Wow. ''Humaniacs III: The Final Battle for Our World''.
:'''Skiff and Eckle''': '''Victory or extinction'''!
:'''Lem''': If you guys go in costume, I'm pretending we've never met. [''Walks away'']
:'''Skiff''': Did you just say what I think you just said?
:'''Lem''': I'm a planetarium professional now. I don't have time for kids movies, anymore.
:'''Skiff''': [''Gasps''] Kids movies? I suppose next you'll say &quot;aliens don't exist.&quot;
:'''Lem''': Duh!
:'''Skiff''': Ha! Just as I thought. You're not Lem. You're an alien zombie like in ''Humaniacs II''.
:'''Lem''': Skiff, I'm not a zombie.
:'''Skiff''': [''Pulls Eckle away from Lem''] Yeah. That's what you zombies are programmed to say. Tell us something the REAL Lem would know.
:'''Lem''': Well, I know Skiff is the only nutcase, who thinks the government is hiding all alien evidence in Base 9. And, you give candy to your puppy so he'll poop jelly beans.
:'''Eckle''': Bleggh!
:'''Skiff''': It was just an experiment.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lem''': So um... Eckle, do you think your sister's home?
:'''Eckle''': Why?
:'''Lem''': I thought, maybe... I thought I might tell her I got the job.
:'''Eckle''': Why?
:'''Lem''': Forget it. You tell her for me. Okay?
:'''Eckle''': Okay, but every time you tell me to tell her something, she asks why don't you tell her yourself?
:'''Lem''': What?
:'''Eckle''': And then my mom says because you like her, and she says that &quot;oh, that is so cute!&quot; Why don't you ask her out already? She's been waiting for you to ask her out ever since we moved next door to you.
:'''Lem''': She-- She has? The girl of my dreams likes me? This is the best day of my life.
:'''Eckle''': Yeah, we've got to see that kid throw up.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lem''': Hey, Neera.
:'''Neera''': Hey, Lem.
:'''Lem''': I came to tell you... I've got the job.
:'''Neera''': Oh, Lem! That's great!
:'''Lem''': [''Nervously''] Umm... maybe it's time for you and me--
:'''Neera''': Yes?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Chuck''': (FOOTSTEPS THUDDING) (HUMMING ''ALSO SPRACH ZARATHUSTRA'') (HUMMING FINALE DRAMATICALLY) (SQUEAKING) What the... (REINFLATING) Duck? (GULPS) (CLEARS THROAT) (WHISTLES) (EXCLAIMING) (GASPS)

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Skiff gives Lem a cork'']
:'''Lem''': A cork?
:'''Skiff''': It's your best defense against the aliens' favorite form of research: ''the probe''. You put it in your... [''points at his buttocks'']
:'''Lem''': [''Nervously''] Yeah, yeah, yeah! I think I get it.
:'''Skiff''': [''Holds out another cork''] Oh, wait ''This'' one's yours. [''Points at the cork Lem's holding''] I already used that one.
:[''Lem exclaims in disgust'']

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Alien Hotline''': ''Hello, this is the Alien Hotline''.
:'''Lem''': Yes, hi. I've found the alien!
:'''Alien Hotline''': ''They're here, and no weapon can stop them''.
:'''Lem''': [''Annoyed''] You've gotta be kidding.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chuck''': [''Taking off his helmet''] I can breathe. [''realizes the air is breathable''] I can breathe!
:'''Lem''': You speak my language.
:'''Chuck''': That's amazing! You speak my language!
:'''Lem''': Yeah, that's what I just said.
:'''Chuck''': You just said, &quot;That's what I just said&quot;. [''Excited''] Say something else!
:'''Lem''': Like what?
:'''Chuck''': &quot;Like what?&quot;. They're gonna freak back at Kennedy. I am Captain Charles T. Baker, astronaut. AS-TRO-NAUT.
:'''Lem''': [''Points at Chuck''] ''AS–''
:'''Chuck''': [''Clears throat''] ''TRO-NAUT''!
:'''Lem''': Lem. ''LEM''!
:'''Chuck''': If your name is Lem, or you want to mate with me? Houston, we have a little problem.
:'''Lem''': What do you want?
:'''Chuck''': Thanks for asking. Coffee, light, two sugars. Got any Frappuchino up here? Any puff pastry, too. Thanks.
:'''Lem''': No, I mean... are you here to take over our world and, like, eat our brains?
:'''Chuck''': Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on! What kind of sick planet is this? First of all, it's supposed to be uninhabited, okay? Not full of [[w:sea-monkey|sea-monkey]]s dancing to the oldies. My mission was to plant Old Glory, whack a few golf balls and head back to the [[w:Kids' Choice Awards|Kids' Choice Awards]]. I'm getting [[w:slime|SLIMED]]! [''Lem stares at him''] What?
:'''Lem''': You were just talking, alien.
:'''Chuck''': Hey! I'm not the alien here. You are.
:'''Lem''': ME? YOU are.
:'''Chuck''': No, YOU are.
:'''Lem''': YOU are! You-- You came to MY planet.
:'''Chuck''': [''Chuckling''] An ALIEN planet! HELLOOOOOOO!
:'''Lem''': Hello.
:'''Chuck''': Not, &quot;hello&quot;, &quot;HELLOOOOOO!&quot;
:'''Lem''': Hello-- What?
:'''Chuck''': What?
:'''Lem''': Huh?
:'''Chuck''': Huh?
:'''Lem''': HUH?
:'''Chuck''': [''Annoyed''] Let's start over. Look, there's a command module in orbit, right now. It's running out of fuel, and has to leave in... [''checks his timer''] 74 hours, and if I'm not on it, it goes back to Earth without me, ''capisce''? [Lem stares at him; Baker sighs]'' I have to get to my ship and go back up in space! Can you help me?
:'''Lem''': You want me to take you to your flying saucer? No! If they catch me helping you, who knows what they'll do to me? I'll lose everything. My life's just getting perfect!
:'''Chuck''': Kid, I-- You are a kid, right? You're not, like, a 1,000-year-old Yoda, or anything? Never mind. Look, kid, you're my only hope! [''Thinking of a lie to convince Lem to help''] But I suppose you could leave me stranded. My wife will have to support the kids. 11. We have eleven kids, always hungry. Yeah, yeah, but hey, they'll get by without a father. The important thing here is for you to avoid a little trouble.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lem''': [''To Chuck, who's hiding behind him''] There's your flying saucer. Now what?
:'''Chuck''': Okay, here's the plan. You knock out that cop, then you overpower those 2, you neutralize that one and handcuff the big guy to the steering wheel.
:'''Lem''': That's your plan!? What if they start shooting?!
:'''Chuck''': You're one of their own. They'll probably just aim for your legs.
:'''Lem''': My legs!?
:'''Chuck''': Don't your legs grow back?
:'''Lem''': No!! We're not like your kind, okay?
:'''Chuck''': Here, I'll tell you what: [''Holds out a [[w:Twix|Twix]] Bar''] Eat this. You'll become invincible.
:'''Lem''': Oh, good. Then you do it.
:'''Chuck''': I can't be seen breaking the law; I've got the &quot;right stuff.&quot;
:'''Lem''': The what?
:'''Chuck''': The &quot;right stuff&quot;. It means, I have a lot of [[courage]].
:'''Chuck''': Now go! Go on! Go! Go! Go!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[''After watching Prof. Kipple telling what to do when Aliens invade on TV'']
:'''Lem''': Jail? [''Chuckling''] This is great! Yesterday, my life was perfect. And now, I'm the most wanted super-criminal in the world.
:'''Chuck''': At least you have a world. I'll probably never see mine again.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chuck''': [''Eyes Rover''] Rover? Boy, am I glad to see you! Rover!!
:'''Lem''': Rover?
:'''Chuck''': He's a probe we sent to take pictures of your world.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Skiff''': [''To Chuck''] Your personal chef, reporting for duty, sir. May I give you some tasty suggestions for tonight? I've got a list of the fattest teachers in my school, in case your looking for a light snack.
:'''Lem''': Skiff, stop! He's not here to eat us or anything. He's harmless, to everyone but me.
:'''Skiff''': Better let me do the talking. I think he's eyeing you for dessert.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Chuck just pretended to placed a spell on two soldiers'']
:'''Chuck''': Hey, maybe, they can get me on my ship.
:'''Lem''': I'm leaning towards &quot;probably not.&quot; [''Rover turns on the TV, showing a reporter''] But I think I know who can.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:[''Chuck notices Lem in a depressed state'']
:'''Chuck''': Hey, kid, what's bugging you?
:'''Lem''': Neera.
:'''Chuck''': What is that? an alien hernia?
:'''Lem''': Well, sort of. She's the girl of my dreams, and ''now'', she ''hates'' me.
:'''Chuck''': Whoa, hate's a strong word. You mean to say, she just... dislikes you.
:'''Lem''': Plus, there's another guy - Glar!
:'''Chuck''': Okay, you know your problem? It's not Glar, or Neera. It's Lem. Look at you. You're so &quot;left-brain&quot;, or is it &quot;right-brain&quot;? Whatever. You're the chief of control. You gotta loosen up. [''Checks his timer''] We got a little time. You, my friend, are in luck. [''Cracking his knuckles''] The ''doctor'' is in.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Chuck puts a record on a record player'']
:'''Chuck''': Before we begin, I have a technical question. Are you considered very... ugly on this planet?
:'''Lem''': What?
:'''Chuck''': Because I can't tell.
:'''Lem''': No. I mean... I'm... okay.
:'''Chuck''': Oh, g-- Good, good.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Chuck''': [''While giving advice on love''] Are you sure you're not ugly?
:'''Lem''': I think so.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Skiff''': [''Catches Chuck trying to kiss Lem; Chuck drops Lem''] '''LEM, THE CORK!! REMEMBER THE PLAN!!'''
:'''Lem''': [''Gets up and goes to the door''] The only ''plan'' here is to get Chuck on TV. I'll be right back with the reporter. I'm leaving you in charge. [''Walks away'']
:'''Skiff''': In charge? [''He smiles; then walks to the others''] You heard him! Things are going to be different around here. [''To Chuck''] My wish is your command! [''Chuck slams the door on him'']

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Lem and Chuck watches an Army convoy taking Chuck's ship to a secret location'']
:'''Chuck''': Oh, look. That is great. Perfect. [''Checks his timer, which has less than 20 hours left''] Oh, JUST GREAT! PERFECT! [[John Glenn]] goes around the world, he's a senator for life! I went across the ''FRICKIN' UNIVERSE''! I should be ''governor''! '''Minimum''', but ''no''… I'm marooned here on this '''STUPID ROCK!!''' [''Bursts into the Planetarium'']
:'''Lem''': [''Marches after him; angrily''] Uh, this ''stupid rock'' is my ''home'', or it was until you came along and ruined everything! '''I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!''' Unless, I don't know, maybe, there's something else you want to ruin!
:'''Chuck''': [''Points''] Who's that?
:'''Lem''': [''Looks at where Chuck is pointing; sighs''] My boss.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Chuck explains Lem about galaxies'']
:'''Chuck''': You're looking right at my home. [''Points to a red star''] See that star? The little red one? Circling that is a planet called Earth. It's about twenty billion miles away, give or take.
:'''Lem''': There's no way Space is that big.
:'''Chuck''': Are you kidding? There's billions of galaxies and each galaxy has billions of stars. Next to that, kid, our planets are just dust in the wind.
:'''Lem''': So... nothing I knew was right?
:'''Chuck''': Come on! You knew about Neera. [''Holds out Lem's picture of her''] I mean look at her! Lose the antenna, get some plastic surgery, she's a hottie.
:'''Lem''': I don't have the &quot;right stuff&quot;, like you.
:[''Short pause'']
:'''Chuck''': Kid… I never ''had'' the &quot;right stuff&quot;. I'm a button-pusher; a spam-in-a-can. I don't even fly the ship; it's all automatic. I only got this far on my charm and rugged good looks. ''You'' risked everything to help a stranger from another world. ''You're'' the one with the &quot;right stuff.&quot; [''Rubs Lem's head'']

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Skiff and Eckle arrive at the Observatory'']
:'''Skiff''': Great hiding spot. I call the closet!
:'''Eckle''': No way! Let's go fight the Army!
:'''Skiff''': [''To Chuck''] How's your species in hiding? Can your skin change to this color?
:'''Eckle''': Your call, Captain Baker. What's it gonna be? Fight or hide?
:'''Lem''': Neither. [''Everybody looks at him'']
:'''Skiff''': I think Lem's saying he wants the closet.
:'''Lem''': I'll tell you what this is gonna be. We're going to get Chuck back to his ship. Skiff, you were right about Base 9. That's where they have his ship.
:'''Eckle''': But... we don't know where it is.
:'''Chuck''': Yes, we do. Rover found me, he's also programmed to find my ship. Wait, where is Rover?
:'''Skiff''': [''Moaning''] It's too painful to talk about.
:'''Eckle''': [''To Skiff''] It's okay. [''To Chuck''] They've got him at the comic book shop.
:'''Lem''': Well, then, we're going to go get him.
:'''Skiff''': [''Calms down''] Hold on. The whole Army's looking for you two. You can't just stroll through town.
:'''Lem''': Wait, wait. That new movie… Doesn't that open tonight?
:'''Skiff''': Yeah! Why?
:[''Lem picks up a helmet like part of technology and looks at the group with a grin on his face'']
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Lem and Chuck are brought on stage for a costume contest'']
:'''Lem''': What are we supposed to do?
:'''Chuck''': [''Pulls out his cellphone''] Give them their daily minimum dose of &quot;Chuck.&quot; [''Walks forward to the crowd''] HELLO, HUMANIACS!!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''General Grawl and the Captain are looking for Chuck in a crowded street'']
:'''Captain''': All of these costumes. Sir, how do we find the alien?
:'''Grawl''': Simple, Captain. Like us, the alien is in uniform. [''Sees Chuck's United States Flag insignia'']

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Chuck is unmasked in front of the whole city; Grawl walks toward him'']
:'''Grawl''': Look at it, Professor. He's hideous! And that smell.
:'''Chuck''': Hey! You try wearing the same suit for 3 weeks!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lem''': No! You're making a mistake! He's friendly!
:'''Kipple''': Ohhh! This poor boy's obviously a zombie. I'll remove his brain, too.
:'''Lem''': [''Guard pushes him forward; terrified''] Huh? '''WHAT?!'''''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''After Chuck &quot;releases&quot; Lem'']
:'''Grawl''': How about it, Professor?
:'''Kipple''': Hmmm. Difficult to tell. [''To Lem''] Do you still believe the alien is friendly?
:'''Lem''': [''Looks at Chuck, who shakes his head, lightly; sighs''] No.
:'''Kipple''': This boy is free!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Lem leaves his dedication and tries to hot-wire a car to go rescue Chuck'']
:'''Neera''': [''Follows him''] Lem? [''Lem doesn't respond; sighs''] I know I was kind of harsh. I'm really sorry.
:'''Lem''': [''Gets his finger shocked''] OUCH! [''Sees Neera''] Oh, hi, Neera.
:'''Neera''': What are you ''doing''?
:'''Lem''': It's called hot-wiring. It's how they start cars on Earth.
:'''Neera''': Lem... um, I was thinking. Well, you know, now that this is all over--
:'''Lem''': Yeah, Neera?
:'''Neera''': Maybe... we could--
:[''Car starts'']

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:[''Lem gets in the hot-wired car and notices that Skiff and Neera are in with him'']
:'''Lem''': You're going with me?
:'''Neera''': Uh-huh.
:[''Eckle pops his head out as Lem looks at him and Skiff'']
:'''Lem''': All right!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Lem''': Neera, I am forever in love with you. The least I could do now is... Oh, I don't know. [''Neera turns to him; chuckles''] 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Grawl''': Thought you could take over our world? your kind knows no decency.
:'''Chuck''': You mean chick magnets?
:'''Grawl''': No, aliens. Tell us your invasion plans! And don't bother taking over my mind. If you do, Captain Kisno has orders to shoot me. If you take over Captain Kisno's mind, Lieutenant Groit has orders to shoot him. If you take over Lieutenant Groit's mind, Sergeant York will shoot Captain Kisno, Lieutenant Groit and myself along with these three soldiers. Each man has a designated target in the squad. Should you succeed in taking over all of our minds, Corporal Hisk has orders to electrocute everyone. If this fails, the entire base is rigged to blow at the touch of a button.
:'''Sergeant York''': Uh, General, sir? Am I supposed to shoot Hecknavar or Kolski?
:'''Soldier #1''': I shoot Kolski.
:'''Grawl''': No. You shoot Meckavoy.
:'''Soldier #1''': Then who shoots Kolski?
:'''Kolski''': I can shoot myself.
:'''Grawl''': That won't be necessary. Hecknavar, you shoot Kolski, Captain Kisno and and graze Corporal Hisk.
:'''Hecknavar''': Yes, sir! [''Shoots Kolski in the foot'']
:'''Kolski''': [''Grabbing his foot''] Ow!
:'''Grawl''': Not yet!
[''The soldiers all aim their guns at each other'']
:'''Sergeant York''': Drop your weapon!
:'''Soldier #1''': You.
:'''Soldier #2''': No, you first.
[''Chuck looks at the two soldiers on both sides on him, a little bit nervous at what’s going on'']
:'''Soldier #3''': You're mine, Hecknavar!
:'''Soldier #4''': I'm not taking my eyes off Kisno.
:'''Captain Kisno''': Drop it, dirtbag!
[''Chuck backs up and accidentally presses a button with his butt'']
:'''Chuck''': Oops.
[''The soldiers, startled by the noise, all fire at each other'']
:'''Grawl''': Hold your fire!
[''Corporal Hisk pulls the lever. The soldiers get electrocuted. Sergeant York is still firing his gun. General Grawl growls, apparently not affected by the electrocution. Hecknavar is still firing his gun. Chuck stares at the two soldiers on both sides of him; he is not getting electrocuted'']
:'''Grawl''': [''Shouting''] HOLD YOUR FIRREEEEE!!! [''Corporal Hisk shuts off the electrocution machine and all the soldiers, except Grawl, fall down''] [''calmly''] Captain Kisno, get everyone out of here.
:'''Chuck''': You're not thinking all this is my fault, right?
:'''Grawl''': All right, if you won't tell us, there's another way to unlock the secrets of your brain. Professor Kipple! He's all yours.

== Taglines ==
* Something strange is coming to their planet... US!
* Right stuff. Wrong planet.
* There's no Space like home.

== Cast ==
* '''[[Dwayne Johnson]]''' - Chuck
* '''[[Jessica Biel]]''' - Neera
* '''[[w:Justin Long|Justin Long]]''' - Lem / Rover
* '''[[Gary Oldman]]''' - General Grawl
* '''[[w:Seann William Scott|Seann William Scott]]''' - Skiff
* '''[[John Cleese]]''' - Professor Kipple

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
* [http://sonywonder.com/planet51/ Official Website - Planet 51]
* [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0762125/ ''Planet 51'' at IMDB]

[[Category:2009 films]]
[[Category:Spanish films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Canadian films]]
[[Category:2000s American animated films]]
[[Category:2000s Spanish animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:British computer-animated films]]
[[Category:Spanish animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated space adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:Animated films about extraterrestrial life]]
[[Category:Screenplays by Joe Stillman]]
[[Category:Films set on fictional planets]]
[[Category:2000s Spanish films]]
[[Category:2000s American films]]
[[Category:2000s Canadian films]]
[[Category:2000s English-language films]]
[[Category:2000s English-language Spanish films]]</text>
      <sha1>n9v8zuhlo3r34ujodqs2ir7d8iz1r03</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rio (2011 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>136783</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965135</id>
      <parentid>3951220</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:12:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965135</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="79376" sha1="84uw1oskpvd9sgbxs8ntfdxkl3pefqd" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Rio (2011 film)|Rio]]''''' is a 2011 American animated [[w:musical film|musical]] [[w:comedy film|comedy film]] produced by [[w:Blue Sky Studios|Blue Sky Studios]] and directed by [[w:Carlos Saldanha|Carlos Saldanha]]. The title refers to the [[Brazil]]ian city of [[w:Rio de Janeiro|Rio de Janeiro]], where the film is set. The film features features the voices of [[Anne Hathaway]], [[w:Jesse Eisenberg|Jesse Eisenberg]], [[w:will.i.am|Will.i.am]], [[w:Jamie Foxx|Jamie Foxx]], [[w:George Lopez|George Lopez]], [[w:Tracy Morgan|Tracy Morgan]], [[w:Jemaine Clement|Jemaine Clement]], [[w:Leslie Mann|Leslie Mann]], [[w:Rodrigo Santoro|Rodrigo Santoro]] and [[w:Jake T. Austin|Jake T. Austin]]. It tells the story of Blu, a male blue macaw who gets taken back to Rio de Janeiro and mates with a female, a free-spirited macaw, named Jewel.  The two eventually fall in love, and together they have to escape from being smuggled by Nigel, a cockatoo. The theme song, '''Telling the World''' was sung by Taio Cruz.

[[w:20th Century Fox|20th Century Fox]] released the film on March 22, 2011 in Brazil, and on April 15, 2011 in the United States.
{{center|'''Join the party!'''([[taglines]])}}

== Dialogue ==
:'''Mother Bird''': Hey!
:'''Red Bird''': ''E'a Ilha diz!''
:''[&quot;Real in Rio&quot; plays]''
:'''Young Blu''': ''[frightened yelp]''
:''[&quot;Whoomp! (There It Is)&quot; by Tag Team playing]''
:'''Bird''': ''[sighs]'' ''[chirping]'' ''[sighs]''
:'''Truck Driver''': ''[screams]''
:'''Bird''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Young Linda''': ''[gasps]'' It's okay. It's okay. Shh. I'll take care of you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[At Present Day]''
:'''Linda''': ''[groaning]'' Stupid clock. ''[grunting]'' Huh? ''[chuckles]'' Good morning, Blu.
:'''Blu''': ''[water swishing]'' ''[gargling]''
:'''Linda''': ''[apits]''
:'''Blu''': ''[belches]''
:'''Linda''': Ew! Ooh! Come here. Tyler Blu Gunderson! You know these vitamins are good for you. ''[gasps]'' Ooh. What's this?
:'''Blu''': ''[squwaks]''
:'''Linda''': Gotcha. Whoo!
:'''Blu and Linda''': ''[imitate booming explosion]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Linda''': Enjoy the new book.
:'''Bookstore Customer''': Thanks, Linda.
:'''Linda''': Bye, now. Yes, Mom, I'd to visit. But who would take care of Blu? Mom, they don't have kennel's for parrots. Here's your hot chocolate, Blu.
:'''Blu''': ''[quawks]''
:'''Linda''': Just how you like it. Plus, I don't trust leaving Blu with just anyone. No, I don't have a bird-sitter...
:'''Blu''': ''[Linda places his hot chocolate in front of him]'' Ah. This is the life. ''[sniffs]'' The perfect marshmallow-to-cocoa ratio. ''[counting the marshmallows]'' One, two, three, four, five... ''[another marshmallow floats to the surface]'' six. Mmm. ''[takes a sip of his cocoa]''
:'''Alice''': ''[laughter]''
:'''Chloe''': Well, well, if it isn't my favorite nerd bird.
:'''Blu''': Very... very funny. Real mature.
:'''Alice''': Hey, pet! Where you migrating to this year, huh? The breakfast nook?
:'''Alice and Chloe''': ''[laughing]''
:''[Chloe and Alice laugh and throw another snowball at the window]''
:'''Blu''': Throw all the snowballs you want. I'm protected by this magical force field called glass. It's what keeps us so toasty and warm in here while you guys are out there freezing your...
:'''Alice''': ''[singsongy]'' La, la, la, la, la! ''[laughing]''
:''[looks up and sees Chloe and Alice showing their behinds to him, making fun]''
:'''Blu''': Classy.
:'''Tulio''': ''[gasping]'' Arara! Arara! Arara! Ara... ''[yelling]'' ''[groaning]''
:'''Linda''': Are you all right?
:'''Tulio''': ''[groans]'' ''[shivering]'' I'm not really built for this weather.
:'''Linda''': Oh. Are you looking for some books?
:'''Tulio''': Books? No. ''[chuckling]'' No. I have come 6,000 miles looking for him.
:'''Blu''': ''[confused grunt]''
:'''Linda''': Doctor of ornithology?
:'''Tulio''': Ooh. He's magnificent. ''[imitates birdcalls]''
:'''Blu''': Linda, little help here. Linda?
:'''Tulio and Blu''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Wow. You're actually communicating.
:'''Tulio''': Yes. Yes. I introduced myself and shook my tail feathers counter-clockwise, thus deffering to his dominance.
:'''Blu''': I did not get that at all.
:'''Linda''': So, Dr. Monteiro, you...
:'''Tulio''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, no &quot;Doctor,&quot; please. Just call me Tulio. You know, your macaw is a very special bird. In fact, as far as we know, Blu is the last male of his kind.
:'''Linda''': Really?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. And recently, we found a female, and our hope is to bring the two of them together to save their species.
:'''Blu''': ''[gulps]''
:'''Linda''': Oh. Well, yeah, sure. When can she come over?
:'''Tulio''': Oh, no, no, no. She is in Brazil. Blu must come to Rio de Janeiro.
:'''Linda''': ''[laughs]'' Rio? Brazil?
:'''Blu''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Linda: '''Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I never let Blu out of my sight. He needs me.
:'''Tulio''': Oh, no. You... you misunderstood. It's all arranged. You will be with him every stop of the way. And I will be with you.
:'''Linda''': Um, look, I know you're doing your job, but I can't... Well, Blu is very particular, and we have our little routine here, and we're not big on travel. Heck, he doesn't fly.
:'''Tulio''': But, of course he can fly. ''[takes Blu and inspects him]'' He's a perfect specimen.
:'''Blu''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Uh, what are you doing?
:'''Tulio''': Don't worry. Their natural instincts always take over.
:''[He lets Blu go so that he will fly, but falls due to not having enough endurance]''
:'''Linda''': Wait! Wait, wait! No! No!
:'''Blu''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Tulio''': Well, almost always.
:'''Linda''': Blu!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]'' What kind of doctor are you?
:'''Linda''': Are you okay?
:'''Tulio''': Perhaps he's too domesticated.
:'''Linda''': It was very nice of you to stop in and squawk around and throw my bird, but now it's time for you to go.
:'''Tulio''': Well, I... I'm very sorry. I... I'm very sorry, but... wait, wait. Linda. Linda. ''[Linda walks him out of the shop]'' This could be our last chance.
:'''Linda''': Have a safe flight. ''[sighs]''
:''[she shuts her shop door in his face and walks away]''
:'''Tulio''': Linda, please, listen to me. If we don't do this, his whole species will be gone. ''[He throws his business card through the door post flap]'' Just think about it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': &quot;Natural instincts.&quot; ''[scoffs]'' There's nothing natural about being thrown halfway across a room. Well, I'll show him. Hmm. ''[reading a book about flying]'' I can do this. I just have to work out the physics. I have quadrated my vector angles. I have adjusted for wind shear. Positive reinforcement. Good. Okay. Let's see. Flaps open.[opens his wings] Perfect. Landing gear. ''[wiggles his claws]'' Check. Tail flaps. ''[flaps his tail]'' Operational. And, actually, not bad. ''[as he prepares to fly for the first time]'' This is it. Let's fly. Just keep it simple. Thrust, lift, drag and weight. Thrust, lift, drag, weight. ''[speeds up to get off the table]'' Thrust, lift, drag, weight. Thrust, lift, drag... W-w-w-wait! ''[gets scared and tries to stop himself, but instead falls from the table]'' ''[screams]'' ''[sighs, screams]'' Ow!
:'''Linda''': Blu? ''[To Blu]'' I promised I would always look out for you, didn't I? And have I ever broken a promise? ''[Blu looks at Linda in worry]'' I'm scared, too, but I wouldn't make you do this if it wasn't the right thing to do. What do you say, Blu?
:'''Linda and Blu''': ''[mitate booming explosion]''
:''[she holds out her hand in a punch, Blu touches his beak and punches his claw to her hand in agreement]''
:'''Linda''': That's my big, brave boy. And we'll be back before we even know it.
:''[&quot;Let Me Take You to Rio (Blu's Arrival)&quot; plays]''
:'''Linda''': Your turn, Blu. You don't want to get beak-burn.
:'''Blu''': ''[frightened gasp]''
:'''Linda''': Whoa! What's going on here?
:'''Tulio''': You arrived in time for Carnival.
:'''Linda''': Carnival?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. It's the biggest party in the world. You know, a time to have fun and dance. ''[imitates rhythmic drumming]''
:'''Linda''': ''[laughs]'' Oh, my. Is she a performer?
:'''Tulio''': No. In fact, she's my dentist. Dr. Barbosa!
:'''Dentist Barbosa''': Oy! Don't forget to floss, Tulio. ''[laughs]''
:'''Tulio''': You got it! Come tomorrow night, everyone will be dressed like that.
:'''Linda:''' ''[chuckles]'' Not me.
:'''Nico:''' ♪Oba, la, la, la, ya E, e, ei!♪ ''E ai?'' Tudo bom?
:'''Blu:''' Oh. Um, oh, right. Uh, yeah. Aah! Uh... ''[slowly]'' ''[Nico and Pedro approach Blu]'' I am not from here.
:'''Pedro''': Hey, Nico. He's a tourist.
:'''Nico''': Funny, you don't look like one.
:'''Blu''': Really? I... I don't.
:'''Pedro''': Except you got pigeon doo-doo on your nose.
:''[Blu wipes the sun cream from his beak]''
:'''Blu''': Oh, oh, oh, no, this is just SPF 3,000.
:'''Nico''': So are you here for Carnival?
:'''Blu''': Oh, actually, I'm just here to meet a... a girl.
:'''Nico''': Oh, a girl!
:'''Pedro''': Yes.
:'''Nico''': Little word of advice: you make the first move. Brazilian ladies respond to confidence.
:'''Blu''': Oh, right.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, it's all about swagger. You got to puff out that chest. Mmm! Swing that tail. ''[makes swishing noise]'' Eyes narrow, like some kind of crazy love hawk. ''[squawks]''
:'''Nico''': But, first, we got to bust you out.
:'''Blu''': What?
:'''Pedro''': Yeah! I'm-a pop that cage open like a soda can.
:''[Pedro tries desperately to break the metal bar on the cage Blu's in]''
:'''Blu''': No, no, no. Whoa! No, no, no, that's okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa!
:'''Pedro''': ''[grunting]'' You call that popping? Whew. This thing's robust.
:'''Blu''': No, no, no. No, guys., really. I'm fine. This cage is great. Love this cage.
:''[Pedro, exhausted, stops pounding the metal bar]''
:'''Pedro''': Ta bom. Suit yourself. Hey, don't forget-- love hawk. ''[squawks]'' ''[he squawks and flies away with Nico]'' Bemvindo!
:'''Blu''': Yes. Yes, bem... ''[stammers]'' And... and to you, as well.

&lt;hr width+&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tulio''': This is the heart and soul of our aviary-- our treatment room. ''[imitates birdcalls]''
:'''Linda''': They really like you. Oh! ''[chuckles]'' A lot.
:'''Tulio''': Yes. I'm their great, big mama bird.
:'''Blu''': Ew.
:'''Linda''': ''[chuckles]'' Wow.
:'''Tulio''': Want some?
:'''Linda''': Ah! Oh, I'm, good.
:'''Tulio''': Many of the birds here were rescued from smugglers.
:'''Linda''': Smugglers?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. And, unfortunately, the poor birds are often hurt or even killed in the process. But with proper care, they can be saved. Look here. This poor guy was found last night.
:'''Nigel''': ''[weak squawking]''
:'''Tulio''': Hey, buddy. You're looking great today. Much better. Much better.
:'''Blu''': Get well soon.
:'''Nigel''': ''[growls]''
:'''Blu''': ''[nervously]'' Oh.
:'''Linda''': ''[in the bird sanctuary]'' So, where's Jewel?
:'''Tulio''': Oh, we have a special place for Jewel. She's a very spirited bird.
:'''Aviary Intern''': ''[groans]'' I'll say.
:''[he turns and his face is covered in scratches and bruises]''
:'''Blu''': She did that? Oh, charming. Okay, I want to go home now. ''[squawking]''
:'''Tulio''': No, no, don't worry. I'm going to make you look irresistible.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts, pants]'' Help! Help! Let me out of here! ''[gasps]'' Linda!
:'''Linda''': Maybe I should...
:'''Tulio''': No, no. Give it a chance.
:'''Blu''': ''[gulps]'' Hello? Whoa! Hello? ''[gasps]'' Uh... I come in peace. ''[gasps]'' Whoa. ''[as he sets eyes on Jewel for the first time]'' She's beautiful. ''[Blu is mesmerized as she flies towards him]'' What were they talking about? She's... she's like an angel. An angel who's getting really close... Aah! ''[suddenly Jewel crashes into him]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[to Blu, after she has pinned him down in the bird sanctuary]'' Quem é você? Quê que você está fazendo aqui?
:'''Blu''': ''[gagging, indistinct babbling]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[Blu tries to speak as Jewel is standing on him with one clawed talon holding his throat]'' Quê?
:'''Blu''': You're standing on my throat.
:''[she gets off him]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh, you're an American.
:'''Blu''': ''[clears throat]'' Thanks. I need my throat for talking, so thank you.
:'''Jewel''': You look like me.
:'''Blu''': Oh. Uh, hi. ''[clears throat]'' Hi. My name is Blu. You know, like the cheese. With the mold on it. You know, that smells really bad. ''[to himself as he realizes what he's just said]'' That's stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
:'''Jewel''': All right, come on. We don't have much time.
:'''Blu''': ''[chuckles nervously]'' Whoa! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. ''[groans]''
:'''Jewel''': Are you ready?
:'''Blu''': For what? ''[he suddenly thinks she's referring to them mating]'' Oh, oh, wow. Uh, okay. ''[to himself]'' Confidence. ''[inhales]'' Crazy love hawk.
:'''Jewel''': All right.
:''[Blu tries to kiss Jewel]''
:'''Blu''': ''[smooching]''
:'''Jewel''': Whoa. Hey. ''[She pushes him away]'' What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': What? What... what you wanted me to. But, just for argument's sake, uh, what are... what are you doing?
:'''Jewel''': I'm trying to escape.
:''[She points to the air conditioning vent]''
:'''Blu''': Oh. Uh, yeah, escape. That-that's where I was going with that thing I just did.
:'''Jewel''': Wait. W-w-w-wait. Did you actually think we were going to kiss?
:'''Blu''': No. No-no-no-no. It's not what you think.
:'''Jewel''': We just met! ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Oh, my.
:'''Tulio''': I think they need a little help.
:'''Blu''': I mean, I know how my feathers look, but I'm not that kind of bird. ''[just then a disco ball comes down, the lights are dimmed and Lionel Richie's 'Say you, Say me' starts playing]''
:''[&quot;Say You Say Me&quot; plays]''
:'''Blu''': Okay, I had nothing to do with that. But, huh, you have to admit it's actually a pretty good song. ''[Jewel gives him a look as he starts singing to the music]'' Yeah, sing it, Lionel. ''[screams and yells]'' ''[grunting]''
:''[Jewel suddenly jumps onto him]''
:'''Linda''': ''[Linda watches on the monitor as Blu and Jewel struggle, thinking they're mating]'' Wow. That was fast.
:'''Tulio''': Lionel Richie, works every time. We should probably give them privacy.
:'''Linda''': I'm not sure I should leave Blu here alone.
:'''Tulio''': Oh, no, no, no. Don't worry. Sylvio will keep an eye on them all night. Besides, he's got Jewel.
:'''Blu''': ''[screaming and grunting]'' Help me! ''[grunts]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Man (on radio)''': Boa noite, Rio! This is the final countdown to Carnaval! Let's samba.
:'''Sylvio''': ''[hums]'' Whoo! ''[humans]'' Ah! ''[humming]'' Huh?
:'''Nigel''': ''[pained chirping]''
:'''Sylvio''': Aw. Come here, poor little birdie. Aw, It's okay. I got you. I got you. ''[muffled shouting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[groans]'' Excuse me. Please. I am trying to sleep.
:'''Jewel''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, I'm sorry, sleepyhead. I'm trying to escape. ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': Escape? Why? The cage is awesome.
:'''Jewel''': The cage... ''[laughs]'' Oh, what was I thinking? I wouldn't expect a pet to understand.
:'''Blu''': Pet? Did you just call me a pet? For the record, I am not a pet. I am a companion. And you know what? Do whatever you want, 'cause tomorrow morning, Linda will come for me and this whole nightmare will be over.
:'''Jewel''': Incredible. You would rather be with a-a-a human than your own kind.
:'''Blu''': Well, that human has given me love and affection for the 15 years, whereas my own kind tried to strangle me after 15 seconds!
:'''Jewel''': Yeah, well, because of them, I've lost everything. You can't trust them. ''[gasps]''
:'''Blu''': Of course, you can trust humans. ''[he hears Jewel make a noise]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': Jewel? Jewel. ''[he sees a boy hover over him]'' Oh. Hi, there. ''[yells]'' ''[A boy named fernando. He puts a bag over Blu's head]''
:'''All''': ''[laughter, festive chatter]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tulio''': It was nice of you to join me for dinner. I often eat alone. Oh, uh, because, of course, my work.
:'''Linda''': ''[chuckles]'' I thought I was the best nut, until I met you.
:'''Tulio''': Yes. Right. Do you have a favorite bird?
:'''Linda''': Well, obviously, I'm a blue macaw kind of gal.
:'''Tulio''': ''[chuckles]'' That makes sense. They are very handsome birds.
:'''Linda''': Actually, it's the brains I'm more attracted to. I'm not so impressed by fancy feathers.
:'''Tulio''': I know exactly what you mean. My favorite bird is the spotted owl. I've always been mesmerized by those big, round, intelligent eyes.'' ''[he looks at Linda's eyes which are big, round, and intelligent-looking]''
:'''Waiter''': Ha ha! Picanha!
:'''Linda''': ''[screams]''
:'''Second Waiter''': Chicken hearts? Flambada!
:'''Linda''': Oh! Ooh! ''[chuckles]'' Chicken hearts. ''[laughs nervously]'' Oh, gosh. Ahh! Oh! ''[blowing]''
:'''Tulio''': Oh. ''[chuckles]'' Hello?
:'''Linda''': ''[sobbing; Blu and Jewel is gone]'' Oh, Blu. We should have never left Moose Lake. ''[Tulio opens and closes the door]'' This is all my fault.
:'''Tulio''': No, no, Linda. Linda, please. ''[crying after finding out Blu has been taken]'' This is not your fault.
:'''Linda''': ''[sniffles]'' You're right. It's not my fault. ''[She puts on her glasses and lashes out at Tulio]'' It's *your* '''FAULT!!'''
:'''Tulio''': What the...?
:'''Linda''': With your little bird talk and that whole &quot;saves the species&quot;. Well, you know what? '''''SQUAWK, SQUAWKETY, SQUAWK, SQUAWK!''''' ''[Realizes what she said; covers her mouth]'' ''[realizing what she's done]'' ''[gasps]'' I'm sorry. I didn't mean to curse.
:'''Tulio''': I... I don't understand. Sylvio is the best guard in the business.
:'''Police Officer''': ''[Linda and Tulio watch as Sylvio gets questioned by a police officer]'' So let me get this straight. You were attacked by a little white bird?
:'''Sylvio''': Yes, with this rag. ''[he holds up a small white rag]'' He held it to my mouth like... like this. ''[muffled babbling]''
:'''Police Officer''': ''[sniffing]'' ''[sighs]''
:''[he holds the rag against his mouth, takes a breath and faints to the ground; the police officer catches the rag, takes a sniff of it and also faints]''
:'''Linda''': We're doomed.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': ''[Blu chants to himself with fear whilst trapped in a cage]'' Okay. Okay. There's no place like home. There's no place like home. Oh, how I wish I was back in my own cage, with my mirror and my swing and my little bell. Oh, how I miss my little bell.
:'''Jewel''': Shh! Play dead.
:''[She drops to the floor of the cage]''
:'''Blu''': What? I don't need to play dead. I'm about to have a heart attack.
:'''Jewel''': Just do it!
:'''Blu''': ''[sighs]'' Fine. ''[moans]'' ''[gagging]'' ''[grunting]''
:''[he fakes a fall and starts twitching]''
:'''Jewel''': Stop twitching.
:'''Blu''': Oh, come on. It's the twitching that sells it.
:'''Jewel''': Shh!
:'''Armando''':[First Words] Come on in, kid.
:'''Marcel''': ''[a boy places the cage holding Blu and Jewel on the table in front of Marcel]''[First Words] Well, what do you know? Good work, Fernando. You see, boys? What did I tell you about this one?
:'''Tipa''':[First Words] That you were going to pay him half as much as you said? ''[Marcel slaps Tipa in the face to shut him up]'' Ow!
:'''Marcel''': No, you idiot. That he reminds me of myself when I was that age. Sweet, resourceful. Here you go, kid. ''[he hands the boy some money]''
:'''Fernando''': Hey. This is only half of what you promised me.
:'''Marcel''': Ah, shut up, kid. ''[takes the cover off the cage to see Blu and Jewel looking dead]'' What the...? ''[he picks up Jewel]'' I thought I told you I needed these birds alive. Tell me, Fernando, does this look alive to you? Huh?
:''[Jewel bites Marcel's thumb and flies away]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[squwaks]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[screams]'' Get her!
:'''Armando''': Come over here!
:'''Armando and Tipa''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': Jewel!
:'''Jewel''': ''[panting]''
:'''Marcel''': Come here!
:'''Jewel''': ''[pants, screams]''
:'''Nigel''':[First Words] Hello, pretty bird. What's the matter? Cockatoo got your throat?
:'''Marcel''': Nigel! Alive.
:'''Nigel''': To be continued.
:'''Tipa''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[groans, sighs]''
:'''Blu''': ''[after Jewel has been caught and placed back in the cage with Blu]'' That was your plan-- to take off and leave me? Gee, thanks.
:'''Jewel''': Well, why didn't you follow me?
:'''Blu''': Uh... ''[doesn't reply as he's too embarrassed to admit he doesn't fly yet]''
:'''Marcel''': Nice work, Nigel.
:'''Tipa''': Yeah, nice work, Nigel.
:'''Marcel''': The last blue macaws on Earth. ''[laughs]'' These are worth a fortune. Hey, Fernando. Hang these up in the other room.
:'''Scaredy Bird''': Hey, Birdy. Let me out. Let me out! Let me out of here!!!
:'''Neurotic Bird''': Who's a pretty bird? I'm a pretty bird. Pretty bird. I'm a pretty bird. ''[laughs]'' I'm a pretty bird.
:'''Bat''': ''[Dracula voice]'' I was framed! They got the wrong guy!
:'''Fernando''': Sorry, guys. Nothing personal. So, what's going to happen to them?
:'''Marcel''': Don't worry. We're going to find good homes for them. Now, go home to your mama.
:'''Fernando''': But I don't have a mama.
:'''Marcel''': Father?
:'''Armando''': Brother?
:'''Tipa''': Goldfish? Aw. Can we keep him, boss?
:'''Marcel''': No! ''[he shuts the door in Fernando's face]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[hearing Marcel talking to his men through the door]'' So, Marcel, what's really going to happen to those birds?
:'''Marcel''': Ugh! Plucked, stuffed, eaten. Who cares? All I know is we're going to be rich.
:'''All''': ''[evilly laughing]''
:'''Armando''': We're gonna be rich!
:'''Fernando''': ''[grunts, groans]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Announcer''': ''[speaking Portuguese]''
:'''Armando''': Come on! The game's starting.
:'''Marcel''': Yes, you were very clear. Tomorrow, or the deal is off. Of course I have both the macaws. Yes, I will deliver them myself. Goodbye. All right, you two. You load the truck tonight. First thing, in the morning, we bring those birds to the airport. You got it?
:'''Armando''': Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah, uh-huh.
:'''Tipa''': Oh, yeah. All right. Heard you.
:'''Marcel''': Oh. And one of you feed Nigel.
:'''Tipa and Armando''': ''[gulp]'' Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.
:'''Tipa''': Yes!
:'''Armando''': Uh-uh. Scissors cuts rock.
:'''Tipa''': Oh, man. How come you always win? ''[nervous grunting]'' Nice birdie. ''[whimpering]'' Yeah, here you go.
:'''Nigel''': ''[shrieks]''
:'''Tipa''': Aah!
:'''Armando''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[sighs, grunts]'' Ugh! Cannibal.
:'''Blu''': ''[trapped in their cage in a room full of the other trapped animals]'' Okay, pull it together. The key is not to panic.
:'''Jewel''': I'm not panicking.
:'''Blu''': I wasn't talking to you; I was talking to me. But it's okay, because any minute now, Linda will find us.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, great. And then she'll stick us behind another set of bars, right?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Uh, I mean, no.
:'''Jewel''': Look, pet, cages might work for you, but I don't want to belong to anyone.
:'''Birds''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[smacking lips]'' Something seems to be lodged in my beak. Would you mind?
:'''Bird''': ''[whimpering]'' ''[screams]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[laughing]''
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]'' Ow!
:'''Nigel''': ''[jumping onto the cage Blu and Jewel are being held in]'' Oh, I know I'm not a pretty birdie, but I used to be quite a looker. A star. Lights, camera, action.
:''[&quot;Pretty Bird&quot; plays]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': Hey!
:'''Nigel''': Sweet nightmares. ''[laughing]'' ''[laughs wickedly and flies away]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': Not cool, man! Scary, but not cool. Hey, are you okay?
:''[She starts throwing herself at the cage bars]''
:'''Jewel''': No, I am definitely not okay!
:'''Blu''': Whoa! Whoa, whoa, wait, wait. What are you doing?
:'''Jewel''': Getting out of here. ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Are you going to help me or what?
:'''Blu''': Actually, all the survival guides say to sit and wait... Ow! ...and help will come.
:'''Jewel''': No one is coming!
:''[She throws herself more violently at the cage]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': We are on our own, and if we just sit here, we're going to die!
:'''Blu''': ''[screams]''
:'''Tipa and Armando''': Yes! Yes! Yes!
:''[Sportscast plays in Portuguese]''
:'''Tipa and Armando''': No!
:'''Tipa''': Nigel, get out of the way!
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Armando''': Yeah! Hold on!
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as Jewel is continuing to throw herself around the cage]'' Stop, stop. Why don't you just open the door? ''[he slides open the cage door with his beak]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[panting]'' Are you kidding me?
:'''Blu''': What? It's just a standard flip slide bolt. Just rotate...
:'''Jewel''': Come on! Let's fly! ''[screams]'' ''[Jewel flies out of the cage and grabs hold of Blu, but Blu grabs the cage with his beak]'' What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': Oh, I can't...
:'''Jewel''': What? You can't what?
:''[Marcel's men open the door to catch them in the act of escaping and Blu lets go of the cage]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa and Armando''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[shrieks]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]'' Whoa! I can't fly!
:''[they both fall onto a washline and start sliding across it]''
:'''Jewel''': You couldn't tell me this before now?
:'''Blu''': It didn't matter before now! ''[muffled grunting]''
:''[they crash into a wall]''
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[holler, grunt]''
:'''Jewel''': I hate you.
:'''Both''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[after they crash land to the ground]'' Is there anything else I need to know?
:'''Blu''': Yes. I can't fly, I pick my beak. And once in a while, I pee in the birdbath. Happy?
:'''Armando''': There they are!
:'''Jewel''': We got to get out of here!
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Move! Come on, just move! Move!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[gasping and grunting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as they're trying to get away from Marcel's men]'' Wait. Wait. Listen to me. Flying may not be my thing, but walking is. Follow my lead. Inside leg, outside leg. ''[he starts leading the way walking]''
:'''Jewel''': Yeah. Yeah, okay. I got it.
:'''Blu''': Inside, outside.
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside, inside, outside!
:'''Blu''': Inside, outside.
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside.
:'''Crowd''': Yes! Yes! Yes!
:'''Tipa''': Huh? Yes! Yes!
:'''Armando''': Come on!
:'''Tipa''': Ow!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[barks like dog]''
:'''Cat''': ''[Meowing]''
:'''Armando and Tipa''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Blu''': See? I'm bilingual, too!
:'''Nigel''': ''[fierce squawking]''
:''[Jewel and Blu are running away from Nigel]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[as they are running away from Marcel's men]'' ''[panting]'' ''[she and Blu are running away from Nigel]'' Oh, this is great. I'm chained to the only bird in the world who can't fly.
:'''Blu''': Actually, there are about 40 species of flightless birds.
:'''Jewel''': ''[notices a box]'' Duck!
:'''Blu''' No, [[w:Duck|ducks]] can fly.
:'''Jewel''': ''[notices a crate]'' No! Duck! ''[referring to them ducking under a cart they're about to encounter]''
:'''Blu''': Ahh! Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Guy''': Oh! Whoa!
:'''Girl''': Whoo! Yay!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Jewel''': Whoa!
:'''Man''': ''[speaking Portuguese on TV]''
:'''Crowd''': Yes!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Crowd''': Yes!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Crowd''': Yes!
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Crowd''': Yes! Yes!
:'''Blu''': Hold on!
:'''Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Nigel''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Announcer''': ''[shouting]''
:'''Crowd''': No! No!
:'''Chicken''': ''[clucking]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[groaning]'' Get out of here, you putrid poultry! ''[groans]'' Ahh! Ow! Ah!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunts, sighs]'' ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''':  ''[confused and step on a stick]'' Ooh, ooh. What was that?
:'''Jewel''': A stick.
:'''Blu''': ''[asked and hit something]'' Ah! And that?
:'''Jewel''': ''[calmly and kept walking]'' It's just a rock.
:'''Blu''': Oh, right. Yeah. ''[Blu stops and shudders as he feels something on his back]'' ''[whimpers]'' Is that a spider on my back?
:'''Jewel''': Will you quit it? It's just a leaf. Turn around. ''[Blu turns and we see a huge spider on his back]'' ''[gulps]'' Um... ''[Jewel quickly hits the spider off of Blu's back]'' ''[grunts]'' Leaf. Told you. Now, uh, just come on. We need to find a safe place to spend the night.
:'''Blu''': Safe? Safe? We are in the jungle. You know when people say, &quot;It's a jungle out there&quot;? Well, I'm pretty sure they don't mean it as a good thing.
:'''Jewel''': Look, I hate to break it to you, but this is where our kind naturally lives.
:'''Blu''': Hey, hey, don't talk to me about nature. I watch Animal Planet. I know all about the food chain. ''[just then a bug flying by gets eaten by a frog A snake]'' Ah! Ahh! You see? You see? Out here, I'm just an hor d'oeuvres. Nothing more than a feathery spring roll.
:'''Jewel''': That is why we stay in the trees and not on the ground. ''[pointing to a large tree ahead of them]'' After you. ''[pointing to a man-made tree house]''
:'''Blu''': Oh. No. I don't think so. Nuh-uh. No. I would feel much more confortable in something man-made. Um... Hey. How about up there?
:'''Jewel''': I can't believe I have to drag your clumsy butt up there.
:'''Blu''': Drag me? ''[scoffs]'' Watch and learn.
:'''Jewel''': Oh! Blu! Oh! Just wait one... ''[gasps]'' Blu! Ha!
:'''Blu''': Who's dragging whose butt now, huh?
:'''Jewel''': Ha ha. Very funny. ''[laughing]'' Oh! ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as Blu reaches the top of the tree house]'' You see? Who needs flying?
:'''Jewel''': Birds. Birds need flying. Flying is... it's freedom and-and not having to rely on anyone. Don't you want that?
:'''Blu''': Mmm, I don't know. Sounds a little lonely. Uh... uh, I'm probably going to be up for a little while, muh, 'cause I'm-I'm still on Minnesota time.
:'''Jewel''': Good night.
:'''Blu''': Good night, Jewel. ''[looks out into the sky]'' Good night, Linda.
:'''Linda''': Excuse me, Sir? Have you seen my bird? Have... have you seen my bird?
:'''Woman''': Mm-mm.
:'''Linda''': ''[sighs]'' Excuse me. Um, have you seen my bird? Ma'am? ''[snoring]'' Mmm. Have you seen my bird? ''[indistinct mumbling]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fernando''': Lady! American lady!
:'''Linda''': ''[gasps]'' Blu? Blu?
:'''Tulio''': Ah! Where? ''[clears throat]'' Oh!
:'''Fernando''': ''[gasps]'' Wow. I know where your birds are.
:'''Linda''': You found Blu? Are you sure? ''[gasps]'' It's his!
:'''Tulio''': Let me see that. ''[babbling]'' ''[slurping]'' Hmm. You're right.
:'''Linda''': Okay. Where is he?
:'''Fernando''': Come on. Let's go. I'll take you to him.
:'''Tulio''': No, no, no. Linda, Linda, wait. We don't know this boy. We can't trust him.
:'''Linda''': I have to trust him. I don't have a choice.
:'''Chickens''': ''[clucking]''
:'''Armando''': ''[clears throat]''
:'''Marcel''': Do you think. I am an idiot?
:'''Tipa''': Uh...
:'''Marcel''': They were two birds, chained together, in a cage. HOW COULD YOU LOSE THEM!
:'''Tipa''': They outsmarted us, boss. But-But don't worry. We'll get them back. I have a plan.
:'''Marcel''': Oh, great. What are you going to do, wander the city calling, &quot;Here, birdie, birdie. Here, birdie&quot;?
:'''Tipa''': Well, anything sounds dumb when you say it like that. ''[groans]''
:'''Armando''': ''[laughs]''
:'''Marcel''': Okay. We have to get the birds to the airport tonight.
:'''Tipa''': But it's Carnival. All the roads will be blocked by the parade.
:'''Marcel''': And that's why I wanted to go this morning! Nigel! ''[Nigel flies over onto Marcel's shoulder]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Marcel''': This bird is ten times smarter than the two of you combined.
:'''Tipa''': Yeah, well, if he's so smart, then why don't you put him in charge?
:'''Marcel''': I am putting him in charge.
:'''Armando''': ''[to Tipa]'' Stop suggesting things!
:'''Marcel''': Go find them nigel. ''[Nigel flies out of the window in search of Blu and Jewel]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[gasps]''
:''[Nigel flies out of the window in search of Blu and Jewel]''
:'''Marcel''': Hmm. If we can't get through the parade. We'll have to be in the parade.
:'''Men''': Huh? ''[grunting]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jewel''': ''[as they are pulling up a huge rock on a rope]'' Are you sure this is going to work?
:'''Blu''': Positive. Check out my math. ''[pointing to the map he's drawn on the ground]''
:'''Jewel''': Yeah, that's... that's comforting. Thank you. Look, let's just get this chain broken.
:'''Blu''': Right. Then we can go and find Linda.
:'''Jewel''': No, you can go find Linda. Once this chain is off, I'm going to go back to being free in the jungle. Deal?
:'''Blu''': Fine. Deal. ''[screams]''
:''[he puts one of his wings up accidentally, pulling the lever holding the rock off its hook]''
:'''Both''': ''[yelling]'' ''[groaning]''
:'''Jewel''': Nice try, brainiac. ''[groans]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]'' I think something is watching us.
:'''Toucan Children''': ''[chirping]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh, be careful, Blu. They might snuggle you to death.
:'''Blu''': Oh. ''[chuckles]'' Aw, come here. ''[screaming, groaning]''
:'''Toucan Children''': Intruders!
:'''Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[yelling and groaning]''
:'''Blu''': Now stop! Ow! Aah! ''[gulps, gags]'' Aah! No! No! Whoa! Whoa!
:'''Toucan Son''': Attack!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': Help!
:'''Rafael''': What's going on down there?
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[grunting and groaning]''
:'''Rafael''': Go, go, go. Off with you.
:'''Toucans Children''': Daddy! Daddy!
:'''Rafael''': Okay, guys, guys... I've told you thousand times. Manuela, Sofia, come on, now. Listen to me. Ow! Oh, yeah, right in the eye.
:'''Jewel''': ''[referring to Rafael's children]'' Oh, precious, aren't they?
:'''Rafael''': ''[chuckles]'' Kids? 17 of them, and one on the way. ''[shouting to two of his children shaking an unhatched egg]'' Hey!'' ''He is not a maraca! Stop shaking him! ''[turning to Blu and Jewel]''
:'''Toucan Children''': ''[giggling]''
:'''Rafael''': They're giving me gray feathers. Oh, this papa needs a break. So, you two lovebirds headed for Carnival?
:'''Jewel''': Whoa. ''[chuckles]'' Lovebirds?
:'''Blu''': Uh, we're more like acquaintance birds.
:'''Jewel''': And not even that. We're more like chained-to-each-other birds.
:'''Blu''': Yeah. I-I mean, if... Ow!
:'''Toucan Kid''': ''[giggles]''
:''[one of toucan kids pulls his feather]''
:'''Blu''': What is it with this kid and the feathers?
:'''Rafael''': We have no idea. We're having him tested.
:'''Jewel''': So, do you think you could help us get this thing off?
:'''Rafael''': Hmm. Lucky for you, you know Rafael, and Rafael knows everyone. Oh! Again with the eye. Okay, want me to call your mother?
:'''Toucan Children''': No!
:'''Rafael''': ''[chuckles]'' Works every time. They're scared to death of her. Ahh!
:'''Eva''': Call me for what?!
:'''Rafael''': Eva, my love. ''[chuckles]'' I must take this young couple to see Luiz.
:'''Eva''': Luiz? Huh. You don't fool me for a second! You and your amigo just want to sneak off to Carnival.
:'''Rafael''': Oh, Carnival. That magical time when I met the most beautiful bird in the world.
:''[He hugs Eva and blows an air kiss towards her]''
:'''Blu''': Aw.
:'''Jewel''': Ugh.
:'''Eva''': Huh!
:'''Rafael''': I still remember the song that was playing when I first laid eyes on you. ♪ Tall and tanned and young and lovely ♪ ♪ The girl from Ipanema ♪ ♪ Goes walking ♪ Come on, baby, sing it!
:'''Eva''': ''[off-key]'' ♪ And when she passes ♪
:'''Blu''': ''[shuddering]''
:'''Eva''': ''[off-key]'' ♪ Each one she passes goes, &quot;Ahh!&quot; ♪
:'''Rafael''': ''[as Eva sings out of tune]'' Like a river of the sweetest honey.
:''[Blu and Jewel wince as Eva sings]''
:'''Jewel''': Ooh! I guess love is deaf too.
:'''Rafael''': Come here. ''[chuckles as they bang each other]''
:'''Toucan kids''': Ew!
:'''Eva''': Okay. Take them to Luiz, but hurry back.
:'''Rafael''': You are an angel. I'll miss you, my juicy little mango.
:'''Eva''': Oh, me, too, my pudgy papaya.
:'''Boy''': Ow! Ow!
:'''Eva''': ''[hears baby toucans' blow]'' [[Arthur (TV series)|'''Hey! Marco! Carlos! Put your brother down!''' '''''NOW!''''']]
:'''Rafael''': I can't believe she actually let me go.
:'''Blu''': So, uh... how far is this Luiz?
:'''Rafael''': Not far. Thirty minutes as the crow flies.
:'''Blu''': Uh... and how long as the macaw walks?
:'''Jewel''': Bobo here can't fly.
:'''Rafael''': But... but he's a bird!
:'''Blu''': Not all birds fly. There are ostriches.
:'''Jewel''': You are not an ostrich.
:'''Blu''': Well, not technically, but...
:'''Rafael''': Wait, wait, wait! My friends, I wanna help, but to walk the whole way, it... it... it can't be done!
:''[He suddenly notices his kids clambering around his wife asking after him]''
:'''Rafael''': But hey, we might as well give it a shot. Let's go, quickly. No, no, d-don't look back. They sense fear.
:''[He turns Blu and Jewel around and walks away quietly; Jewel turns to look at the kids]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Monkey''': ''[shrieks, chitters]''
:'''Lady Tourist''': Oh, what an adorable monkey.
:'''Guy''': Aw.
:'''Mauro''': ''[indistinct chatter]''
:'''Monkey''': ''[chittering]'' ''[hooting]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[blows raspberries]''
:'''Woman''': Oh. Oh, no.
:'''Man Tourist''': Hey! My watch.
:''[&quot;Funky Monkey&quot; plays]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[grunting]'' ''[hooting]''
:'''Nigel''': Hello, boys. Seems like you've had a busy day.
:'''Mauro''': ''[laughs]'' What, this? ''[Referring to all the stuff they've stolen from tourists]'' This is just some stuff we found. Right, boys? Yeah.
:''[The crowd of monkeys all agree]''
:'''Nigel''': I'm not interested in your nicked knick-knacks. Your burgled baubles bore me. There are two blue macaws out there, and I need your multitude of eyes to help me find them.
:'''Mauro''': Oh, yeah? What's in it for us? ''[chuckles]''
:'''Nigel''': Well, that's a fair question.
:''[He suddenly takes the lead marmoset and flies high into the sky]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Nigel''': Let's discuss it.
:''[Nigel drops him]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[screaming]'' ''[frantic hooting]''
:'''Nigel''': I certainly see your point.
:''[To the lead marmoset as he's falling down]''
:'''Nigel''': But what could I possibly do for you in return? Hmm?
:'''Mauro''': ''[while falling]'' '''Save me! SAVE ME!'''
:'''Nigel''': Oh! Well, that's a thought, yeah. But is it enough? I don't want to feel like I'm cheating you.
:'''Mauro''': Ahh! Help me! Help me! Help me! We'll do it! We'll do it! Save me, please. Save me!
:''[Just before he hits the ground, he stops as Nigel catches him]''
:'''Nigel''': All right, you've twisted my wing. Deal. Now then, anymore questions?
:''[The group of monkeys remain silent]''
:'''Nigel''': No? Good. You will spread out and you will find these macaws by the end of the day, or it's flying lessons for everyone! Go!
:''[The group of monkeys all scream with fright and run off]''
:'''Nigel''': Go do your monkey business.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': ''[whimpers]'' ''[yells]'' ''[as he looks down the edge of a cliff]'' I've changed my mind. Yeah. Uh, maybe we could find a... a bus schedule or something?
:'''Rafael''': Come on. You're not gonna back out now, Not in front of the lady.
:'''Blu''': Uh... huh! Okay, yeah. Yeah, yeah, sure.
:'''Rafael''': All right, that's the spirit.
:'''Jewel''': You're sure you're up for this?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Yeah, I mean, well it's not like we're just hurling ourselves off a mountain or something, right?
:'''Rafael''': Actually, that was pretty much my entire plan.
:'''Blu''': What?
:'''Rafael''': No. Don't worry, Blu. It's in your DNA. And if our featherless friends can do it, how hard can it be?
:''[Two men on a hang-glider have an unsuccessful take-off]''
:'''Man on Glider''': No, no, wait, wait! Aah! Mommy!
:'''Rafael''': Fun, right?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Fun.
:'''Rafael''': Okay. I need you two to get closer. ''[Blu and Jewel step an inch close]'' Closer. ''[Blu and Jewel step another inch close and touch each other]'' Closer. Ooh. Nice. Now put your wings around each other.
:'''Blu''': What?
:'''Rafael''': Come on, amigo! It's not like she's going to bite. Will you?
:'''Jewel''': We'll see.
:'''Rafael''': ''[to Blu and Jewel who are standing side by side]'' Now, you flap your right wing, you flap your left wing, and together, you fly.
:'''Blu''': Uh... but this doesn't seem aerodynamically possible!
:'''Rafael''': Ey-ya-ya-ya-ya! You think too much! Fly! It's not what you think up here. ''[points to Blu's head]'' It's what you feel in here. ''[points to Blu's heart]'' And when you feel the rhythm of your heart, it's like Samba! You fly! ''[whooping]'' ''[as Rafael is demonstrating flying to Blu]'' See? It's easy.
:'''Blu''': Easy? Easy for you to say. 'Cause from... from here it looks really, really hard!
:'''Jewel''': Hey, if you want to see Linda again, this is the only way.
:'''Blu''': Okay, you're right.
:'''Jewel''': Yes, I am.
:'''Blu''': This is for Linda.
:'''Jewel''': Right!
:'''Blu''': Keep it simple.
:'''Jewel''': Easy-breezy.
:'''Blu''': Thrust, lift, drag.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, come on! Let's go!
:''[She drags him along]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa, whoa, wait!
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside. Inside, outside.
:'''Blu''': Inside, outside. Inside, outside.
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside.
:'''Blu''': Inside...
:'''Jewel''': Come on, Blu! You can do it!
:'''Blu''': I can do it. I can do it. I can do it. I can't do it! ''[yells]''
:'''Jewel''': Whoa! Not again!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': ''[sighs]'' Am I dead?
:'''Jewel''': No. We're still alive! ''[laughs]''
:'''Blu''': ''[sighing]'' This is incredible. Wow. This is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
:'''Jewel''': ''[laughs]'' See what you've been missing?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Whoa!
:'''Rafael''': ''[after Blu and Jewel have landed on top of a hand glider's wings]'' All right, Blu! You're flying! Sort of. Not really. But do you feel it?
:'''Blu''': Yes! I do feel it.
:''[Blu stands up confidently and spreads his wings about to/ready to fly for real]''
:'''Jewel''': No! No! Blu, wait!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:''[Both holler as they get windswept off the hang-glider]''
:'''Rafael''': Ay, caramba.
:''[Blu accidentally punches a hole in an orange and pink hang-glider; male human screams when he sees Blu]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Aah! ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa, whoa! Aah!
:'''Other Hang Glider''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Blu''': Aah! Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': We're going to die! ''[whimpers]'' Whoa!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Other Hang Glider''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Both''': Aah! ''[grunting]''
:'''Rafael''': ''[after Blu and Jewel have crash landed to the ground from Blu's nearly successful but failed attempt at flying]'' You did not feel it in here. ''[pointing to his heart]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[sarcastically]'' You think?
:'''Rafael''': Let's catch a ride to Luiz. Hurry, you two! Vamos! Vamos!
:'''Blu''': Ah, okay. Ahh! Last of the species here. Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Move it! ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': Hey, wait... wait-wait... wait up.
:'''Rafael''': Come on, lovebirds.
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Rafael''': Ah, you made it.
:'''Jewel''': ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': I would love to go five minutes without almost getting killed. Is that too much to ask?
:'''Jewel''': For a bird who can't fly? Oh, yeah.
:'''Officer''': ''[blows whistle]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tulio''': They're starting to close off the streets for Carnival. You better be right, kid, because we're running out of time. ''[groans]'' I'll never be able to get my car through this crowd.
:'''Fernando''': Don't worry, I'm on it.
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[yelling]''
:'''Chickens''': ''[clucking]''
:'''Tulio''': Hey, kid! How'd you get this bike?
:'''Fernando''': I traded it for your Jeep.
:'''Tulio''': What?!
:'''Fernando''': Yeah, it's in great condition.
:'''Tulio''': Whoa!
:'''Fernando''': Well, good condition!
:'''Linda and Tulio''': Aah!
:'''Fernando''': Hey, out of the way!
:'''Linda''': Look out!
:'''Tulio''': Ow! ''[screams]''
:'''Fernando''': Hold on!
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[shuttered grunting]'' ''[screaming]''
:'''Blu''': Ahh!
:'''Jewel''': Whoa!
:'''Blu''': ''[groans]'' Ow!
:'''Jewel''': Ugh. I'm going to chew through my own leg if this doesn't come off soon.
:'''Rafael''': Relax. If I know Luiz, we're right where we wanna be.
:'''Nico''': Hey, Rafi! If it isn't the king of carnival!
:'''Rafael''': Nico! Pedro! What up, family?
:'''Pedro''': Where you been hidin' yourself, bird?
:'''Nico''': Man, I thought you were dead.
:'''Pedro''': Hold up! Rewind. ''[going towards Blu]'' Ain't that the bird from the cage?
:'''Nico''': I think our love lessons went down smooth.
:'''Pedro''': You work fast!
:'''Nico''': Baby got big!
:'''Pedro''': You was locked up and now you're rollin' up with a hot wing! Woo! I wanna be like you.
:'''Blu''': Oh, no, no. It's not what you think. We're just uh... chained together.
:'''Nico''': Hey, I'm not judging you.
:'''Pedro''': Keep it spicy.
:'''Nico''': Oh, yeah.
:'''Rafael''': Hey, guys. We're looking for Luiz. Have you seen him?
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, I seen him, but you didn't, 'cause you just missed him. He took the trolley back to the garage.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, great.
:'''Nico''': Relax, baby bird. You could catch the next one.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, it's time to take it to the next level.
:'''Blu''': What's wrong with this level?
:'''Pedro''': Come on. This ain't the level. The next level's the level. You got to shake your tail feathers.
:'''Nico''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Blu''': Uh, we... we got to get this chain off first.
:'''Rafael''': Come on, lovebirds. You're in Rio. You should enjoy it!
:'''Nico''': Yeah, live a little.
:'''Mauro''': Ah. Ooh. Hmm? ''[laughs]'' We got 'em.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[dance music playing, festive yelling]''
:'''Birds''': ''[laughter]''
:'''Kipo''': Hey!
:'''Nico''': Welcome to paradise!
:'''Rafael''': Some party, huh?
:'''Blu''': ''[as they enter a club full of birds dancing and thumping with music]'' This is the coolest place I've ever seen. Despite all the obvious health code violations.
:'''Rafael''': ''[laughs]'' I like you! Nothing you say makes any sense.
:'''Nico''': E ai, galera? All right, everyone, listen up. Rafi has some special guests from out of town, and let's show them some love, because I don't think they get out much.
:'''Pedro''': Ya, ya, ya, ya, yo! Everybody put their wings together and clap 'em as loud as you can! Flap 'em, clap 'em. I don't care, slap 'em. ''[squwaking]''
:'''Nico''': Party in the Ipanema, baby.
:''[&quot;Hot Wings (I Wanna Party)&quot; plays]''
:'''Jewel''': What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': Uh, I don't know.
:'''Rafael''': All right, Blu! Hey, she likes you.
:'''Blu''': What are you talking about? Haven't you been listening?
:'''Rafael''': No, but I've been watching. Just be yourself. Go on.
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''♪ Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! ♪''
:'''Monkeys''': ''[chittering and hooting]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[from trailer]'' You two are coming with me.
:'''Jewel''': In your little monkey dreams. ''[spits on the ground]''
:'''Blu''': Yeah. ''[tries to spit too, but it sticks to his beak. He wipes it off.]'' That was meant for you.
:'''Rafael''': Come on. Can we all just get along?
:'''Mauro''': This isn't your fight, big nose. ''[laughs, gasps]''
:''[The marmosets laugh, until one bird grabs Mauro's arm and glares at him.]''
:'''Kipo''': You mess with my friends, you mess with me.
:'''Other Birds''': And us!
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, little [[King Kong]].
:''[The marmosets and birds have an intense stare-off]''
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[panicky]'' I don't know what's going on here. ''[flies off]''
:'''Pedro''': ''[breaking a stare-off]'' '''&lt;big&gt;BIRDS VS. [[w:Common marmoset|MONKEYS]]!&lt;/big&gt;'''
:''[The birds charge in.]''
:'''Mauro''': Get them!
:''[The marmosets charge in.]''
:'''All''': ''[shouting, grunting]''
:'''Monkey''': ''[laughs, grunts]''
:'''Pedro''': Yippee-kai-yay, monkey man!
:'''Nico''': Yeah!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[asps]''
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Mauro''': Ohh!
:'''Monkey''': Yee-haw! Yee-haw! Giddyap!
:'''Rafael''': ''[grunting]'' Missed!
:'''Monkey''': ''[hooting, whooping]''
:'''Jewel''': We got to go! ''[gasps]''
:'''Kipo''': Need a lift?
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Nico''': ''[gasps]'' ''[whooping]'' ''[as he hits one of the monkey's with his bottle top hat]'' ''[laughs]'' Ooh! Take that, you funky monkey!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[laughing, whooping]''
:'''Blu''': ''[chuckles]'' Thank you!
:'''Kipo''': Anytime! Whoo-hoo!
:'''Pedro''': That's what I'm talking about!
:'''Blu''': ''[as they've gotten away from the monkeys]'' Man, we threw down!
:'''Jewel''': Yeah, we threw down!
:'''Rafael''': You guys were like fire and ice.
:'''Nico''': Thunder and lightnin'!
:'''Pedro''': Hip 'n' hop!
:'''Blu''': Cheese and sprinkles!
:''[they all stop laughing and give Blu a strange look]''
:'''Blu''': It's a Minnesota thing.
:''[they all laugh]''
:'''Rafael''': You see? Nothing you say makes any sense.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fernando''': Come on. Follow me.
:'''Tulio''': Uh... ''[groans]''
:'''Fernando''': What? But... the birds were here.
:'''Tulio''': Yeah, sure they were, kid.
:'''Fernando''': I swear! The birds were right here.
:'''Linda''': Well, how do you know?
:'''Fernando''': Because I'm-- I'm the one who took them.
:'''Linda''': You?!
:'''Fernando''': I-I... I didn't mean to hurt anybody... I needed the money.
:'''Linda''': But Fernando, I trusted you!
:'''Fernando''': I know, but-- ''[Before he can finish Tipa and Armando enter]''
:'''Linda''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, man, that's good.
:'''Fernando''': Hey, guys.
:'''Armando''': What are you doing here?
:'''Fernando''': I just wanted to see if... you had any work for me.
:'''Tipa''': Well, if you were here two hours ago, and you've could've helped us load the... Ow! What?
:'''Armando''': ''[quietly]'' Shut up.
:'''Fernando''': So, wh-why are you guys dressed for Carnival?
:'''Tipa''': So no one will notice us when we smuggle these b... Ow!
:'''Armando''': Shut up!
:'''Tipa''': ''[quietly]'' We made a float.
:'''Fernando''': Oh. Oh, a-a float. So, you guys are going to the parade. Can I come? I'm a great dancer.
:'''Tipa''': Can he come? Come on, please? Three's better than two?
:'''Fernando''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Armando''': ''[groans]'' Oh, fine. We got to hurry, though.
:'''Fernando''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa''': Whoa. I almost forget. I thought it was right here. ''[grunting]'' Ah, there it is. Huh. Got it. ''[chuckles]'' Let's go.
:'''Fernando''': Whew!
:'''Armando''': Hurry up, kid.
:'''Tipa''': Can he ride on the plane with us, too? Ow!
:'''Armando''': Shut up!
:'''Tulio''': No. We can't let them get on that plane.
:'''Linda''': You can drive a motorcycle, right?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. You insult me. Hmm!
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Guy''': ''[yells]''
:'''Linda''': Ooh...
:'''Tulio''': Ow... No, I can't... drive a motorcycle. ''[distorted yelling]''
:'''Linda''': Whoa! It's just like riding a snowmobile! ''[chuckles]''
:'''Tulio''': ''[yells]''
:'''Nigel''': What happened?
:'''Lead Marmoset''': ''[whimpers]'' Papa?
:'''Nigel''': What happened?!
:'''Mauro''': ''[woozy groan]''
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[cheeping quietly]''
:'''Nigel''': Ha!
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[squeaky]'' Oh, no, let me go!
:'''Nigel''': ''[grabs hold of a tiny green bird]'' Stop your chirping and talk to me!
:'''Little Green Bird''': No! No! No! I don't know anything! Help!
:'''Nigel''': Mmm... when I bite down on your head, will it go pop? Or will it go crack? ''[he squeezes hard on the little green birds head]'' Where are the cerulean birds? That means blue, by the way.
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[gasps]'' They escaped! Went to Luiz.
:'''Nigel''': Anything else?
:'''Little Green bird''':(Smiles) They said you were very nice.
:'''Nigel''': Hmm, did they? Well, liar.
:'''Little Green bird''': And handsome too?
:''[Nigel throws the little green bird and it hits the lead marmoset in the head]''
:'''Nigel''': Never send a monkey to do a bird's job. ''[squawks]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rafael''': Pssst!
:'''Blu''': ''[whispers]'' Don't worry, I got it.
:'''Rafael''': ''[as he watches Blu getting closer to Jewel]'' There he goes! That's my boy!
:''[Blu tries to wrap his wing around Jewel but stops mid-way as Jewel looks at him]''
:'''Blu''': Ooh! Is it hot? I... I think I'm... I'm sweating. I didn't even think that was biologically possible. I get... look? ''[he holds up his wing]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh. Wow.
:'''Nico''': ''[as they watch Blu make a fool of himself]'' Yeah! That's your boy, alright.
:'''Rafael''': Okay, so he needs a little help. Well, come on. Let's give him some. Set the mood.
:'''Pedro''': Alright, look. I'm on it. I know how to set the mood. Check it out. ''[he starts dancing and rapping]'' Get it-get it-get it-get it-get it-get it girl! Get-ge-get-ge-get it girl! Take her, take her to the flow! Show her, show her how you roll! Drop it! Drop it! Drop it low! Drop it, d-drop it low!
:'''Rafael''': Whoa, whoa, whoa! What kind of mood is that?
:'''Nico''': Pedro, Pedro, a little too aggressive. Not hatin' on your creativity, but I think I got this one. Follow my lead. ''[whistling melody]''
:'''Rafael''': Now, that's more like it.
:'''Nico''': ''[whistling romantic melody over bossa nova rhythm]'' ''[singing]'' Wasn't really thinking, wasn't looking, wasn't searching for an answer / In the moonlight / When I saw your face / Saw you looking at me, saw you peeking out from under moon beams / Through the palm trees / Swaying in the breeze / I know I'm feeling so much more than ever before / And so I'm giving more to you than I thought I could do / Don't know how it happened, don't know why but you don't really need a reason / When the stars shine / Just to fall in love / Made to love each other, made to be together for a life time / In the sunshine / Flying in the sky / I know I'm feeling so much more than ever before / And so I'm giving more to you / Than I thought I could do / Oh yeah... / Now I know love is real / So it's sky high, as the angels try / Letting you and I / Fly love
:'''Jewel''': Wow. What a beautiful sunset.
:'''Blu''': Yeah.
:'''Rafael''': ''[flying alongside the trolley, whispering to Blu]'' Pssst! Blu, down here. Just tell her, &quot;You have beautiful eyes&quot;.
:'''Blu''': That's good! Great idea. ''[to Jewel; confidently]'' I have beautiful eyes.
:'''Jewel''': Aah... yeah. Okay, Sure. They're... they're nice.
:'''Rafael''': ''[flying low, whispers to Blu]'' No! Her eyes! Her eyes!
:'''Blu''': Oh, right. Yeah! ''[turns to Jewel]'' Your eyes. Your eyes are great. Not mine. I mean, you know, mine are okay. But yours, I-I bet you can see right through them.
:'''Rafael''': ''[whispering to Blu]'' Blu, just tell her how you feel.
:'''Blu''': ''[turns to Jewel]'' Jewel?
:'''Jewel''': Yeah?
:'''Blu''': I've been wanting to tell you, that I... that I... ''[suddenly swallows a floating flower petal and chokes]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh, how sweet. You're getting choked up. ''[turns to look at Blu and realizes he's really choking]'' Oh! Oh! You're choking! Uh, okay! All right! ''[she starts giving him the heimlich maneuver]'' Come on, Blu, you got to move with me. Stay with me, Blu. Hyah! One more. Come on. One... more... time! Hyah!
:'''Rafael''': ''[they watch in dismay as Jewel gives Blu the Heimlich maneuver]'' Yep, that's my boy.
:'''Nico''': ''[descending whistle then imitates explosion]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after Blu spits out the flower petal and they get off the trolley]''
:'''Rafael''': Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Luiz's garage!
:'''Blu''': After you.
:'''Jewel''': No, no, no, you first.
:'''Blu''': Oh, please, I insist.
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Okay. ''[thump]'' ''[chuckling]''
:'''Jewel''': Yeah. ''[chuckles]'' ''[sighs]'' Guess this is it.
:'''Blu''': Uh, yeah. Quite an adventure.
:'''Jewel''': End of the line.
:'''Blu''': Ah, yes.
:'''Jewel''': Guess things like this don't happen in Tiny-soda.
:'''Blu''': Tiny-soda? ''[laughs]'' Oh. Wait, Minne-sota?
:'''Jewel''': Yeah. ''[laughs]''
:'''Blu''': Oh, that's very good.
:'''Jewel''': Right.
:'''Blu''': That's very funny, actually.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rafael''': Luiz! Are you here? Luiz? Hey, buddy. I got some friends I want you to meet.
:'''Luiz''': ''[vicious barking]''
:'''Pedro and Nico''': Aah!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Aah! Inside! Outside! Inside Outside! ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': ''[whimpering]'' ''[disgusted groan]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[laughing]'' I got you's good!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': What?
:'''Luiz''': I could've ripped your throats out, but I didn't. ''[slurps]'' But I could've.
:'''Rafael''': ''[laughs]'' Hey, Luiz! Stop scaring my friends.
:'''Luiz''': Hey, Rafie! Come here! Where you been?
:'''Rafael''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Luiz''': You look good.
:'''Jewel''': W-W-Wait. Luiz is a [[w:Bulldog|bulldog]]?
:'''Luiz''': You got something against dogs?
:'''Jewel''': I do when they're drooling on me.
:'''Luiz''': ''[slurps]'' It's a medical condition.
:'''Rafael''': No, no, hey, amigo, we really need you.
:'''Luiz''': She's mean, bro.
:'''Rafael''': Luiz, come on, please, please. We need your help.
:'''Luiz''': Hmm. ''[slurps]'' I think I know what to do.
:'''Blu''': Uh, are you sure this is safe?
:'''Luiz''': Oh, sure. There's nothing to it. ''[muffled, echoing]'' Now if something goes wrong, scream really loud. Because I hear too good with this thing on. Hey, Raffie! Get the switch, please.
:'''Rafael''': Don't worry. He's a professional. ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Nico''': ''[whimpering]''
:'''Luiz''': Now, try not to move! I can't really see out of this thing, either!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasping]'' ''[deep, distorted yelling]'' ''[distorted yelling continues]'' Whoa!
:'''Rafael''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Luiz''': Hey! Where'd you go?
:'''Blu''': Whoa...!
:'''Jewel''': ''[gasps]''
:'''All''': ''[strained grunting]''
:''[As he swipes Luiz's drool off his foot]''
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[grunting, spits]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as he swipes Luiz's drool off his foot]'' Ugh! Ew, gross. ''[gasps]'' But I'm free. ''[realizing he's freed from his chain]'' Jewel! Jewel, we're free! Slimy, but free. Contaminated, probably. But free! You believe it's finally...
:''[Jewel suddenly flies past him, laughing with joy]''
:'''Jewel''': Ha-ha! ''[whooping]''
:'''Blu''': ...over.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, yeah! Whoo! Wah-hah! Come on, guys, let's go!
:'''Nico''': What are we standing around for? It's Carnival!
:'''Pedro''': ''[whooping]''
:'''Nico, Pedro and Rafael''': ''[whooping, shouting happily]''
:'''All''': ''[whooping, laughing]''
:'''Rafael''': Beautiful!
:'''Pedro''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Jewel''': ''[shouts happily]''
:''[As Blu sadly watches Jewel, Nico, Pedro and Rafael fly around in the sky with joy]''
:'''Luiz''': Yep. I know just how you feel. Watchin' 'em up there, makes you want to chase them and grab 'em in your mouth and bite their heads off. Huh? ''[slurps]'' ''[Blu remains silent]'' Hey, I'm just kiddin', bro. Yeah. Chasin' 'em is plenty.
:'''Jewel''': ''[laughing]'' ♪ I'm flying flying just like a bird! ♪
:'''Nico''': Jewel, but you are a bird.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[As she is happily flying, Jewel notices Blu walking away sadly]''
:'''Jewel''': Hey, where you going? ''[Blu ignores her and keeps on walking]'' Blu? ''[Blu stops walking]'' Blu, what's wrong?
:'''Blu''': Nothing. Everything's perfect. You'll be off to the rain forest. I'll be back with Linda. Just like we planned.
:'''Jewel''': I...
:''[Nico and Pedro fly down towards them]''
:'''Nico''': Hey, birds! Stop yappin' and start flappin'! Let's go!
:'''Jewel''': I...I...I guess I thought maybe...
:'''Blu''': What? That you...you'd come to Minnesota? ''[Jewel just looks at him]'' Great, I guess I... I'll knit you a scarf.
:'''Jewel''': No, that's not what I meant.
:'''Blu''': Look Jewel, I can't spend my life walking around following you wherever you're going.
:'''Jewel''': Hey, it's not my fault you don't fly.
:'''Pedro:''' ''[to Nico as they watch Blu and Jewel argue]'' Awkward.
:'''Rafael:''' ''[to Blu and Jewel]'' ''[as he notices Blu and Jewel starting to argue]'' Okay, okay. You know what? It's just good. Just clear the air. Just be completely honest with each other.
:'''Blu''': You want honesty? ''[to Rafael and Jewel]'' Fine, fine, I can be honest. I don't belong here. In fact, I never wanted to even come here in the first place. ''[stammers]'' And... and... and you know what? I hate samba.
:''[Jewel and Rafael gasps and Nico starts crying into Pedro's wing]''
:'''Pedro''': Hey! That's a little too far.
:'''Nico''': Make the mean bird take it back.
:'''Blu''': Yeah, I said it. Every song sounds exactly the same. ''[sings]'' Tico, taco ya-ya-ya. Tico, taco ya-ya-ya! ''[groans]'' I'm tico-taco out of here.
:'''Jewel''': ''[angrily]'' Fine! See you around, pet! ''[starts flying away from Blu]''
:'''Rafael''': No, no. Wait, wait, wait. Come back! You belong together. You are Juliet to his Romeo! Sure, they both die at the end. But, you get my point! Oh, young love. Always so melodramatic. ''[to Nico and Pedro]'' All right, boys. Go after her. ''[starts heading over to Blu]'' Blu! Come back here, come on!
:'''Luiz''': Yeah! I'm ready for Carnival! Who wants to ride in my... fruit? You left without me. That's messed up. ''[slurps]''
:'''Pedro''': ''[panting]'' Jewel! Jewel!
:'''Nico''': Wait up!
:'''Jewel''': ''[trembling exhale]'' ''[sniffles]'' ''[sighs]'' ''[gasps]''
:''[Nigel catches Jewel as she's flying]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[catches Jewel as she is flying]'' Going somewhere, pretty bird?
:'''Jewel''': Oh, yeah. I was just on my way to claw your eyes out! ''[punches Nigel in the face; Nico and Pedro see Nigel get a hold of Jewel]''
:'''Nigel''': Temper. Temper. Now come along, my dear. We're going to a parade. And everybody loves a parade! ''[flies away with Jewel]''
:'''Jewel''': Let go of me!
:'''Pedro''': ''[as he, along with Nico, watch Nigel take Jewel by force]'' ''[as they watch Nigel take Jewel by force]'' Hey! Get back here! Ain't nobody mess with a friend of Pedro. I ain't havin' it! It's on! ''[starts punching the air]''
:'''Nico''': What are you-- on?! Did you see the talons on that guy?
:'''Pedro''': &quot;Talons? Maybe, it's on next time.''[he and Nico turn and fly away]'' '''RALFIEEEE!'''
:'''Nico''': Blu! Help!
:'''Pedro''': Help!
:''[Cut on Blu walking home, with Rafael following him]''
:'''Blu:''' Rafael, quit following me. You're going in the wrong direction. Isn't Carnaval that way?
:'''Rafael:''' I'm not going to Carnaval. No, I'm going home.
:'''Blu:''' But I thought you loved Carnaval.
:'''Rafael:''' I do. But I love my family much more. And that's a choice I made with this. ''[points to Blu's heart]'' Not with this. ''[points to Blu's head (or brain) meanwhile, Nico and Pedro approach Blu and Rafael]''
:'''Nico and Pedro''': Blu! Blu! Hey, Blu! Blu!
:'''Pedro''': I was flying, and then I saw this big cockatoo!
:'''Nico''': With big ninja taloons!
:'''Pedro''': This cockatoo was ugly.
:'''Nico''': Yeah...
:'''Pedro''': Anyways, that's not the point.
:'''Nico''': And then Jewel was there, and he snatched Jewel up, like, he snatched her up! And then he was, like &quot;You're comin' with me, you little princess?&quot;
:'''Pedro''': And Jewel was, like... ''[imitating kicks and punches]'' &quot;I ain't your princess, Leave me alone.&quot; And I was, like, &quot;What?&quot;
:'''Nico''': Then he was, like, &quot;What?&quot;
:'''Blu''': Stop! Just tell me what happened.
:'''Pedro''': He got Jewel, man!
:'''Both''': And he's taking her to the parade.
:'''Blu''': ''[gasp]'' This is all my fault. Let's fly.
:''[Blu rides on Luiz]''
:'''Luiz''': Carnaval, here we come!
:'''Nico:''' ''[grunts, chuckles]'' Hey, dog, I'm drowning back here!
:'''Luiz:''' You will get wet on this ride! Ha-ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marcel''': Come on, come on, come on. Where are these guys? ''[laughs]''Yes! Nice! Very nice.
:'''Tipa''': ''[calls]'' Marcel! Yoo-hoo! Marcel! ''[clucking like a chicken]''
:'''Marcel''': Oh, boy.
:'''Tipa''': We're a chicken! Cluck, cluck! ''[chuckling, laughing]''(He dresses up as egg) Come on, Fernando, dance! ''[clucking]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[groans]'' Oh, idiots.
:'''Linda''': Excuse me. Um... ''[clears throat]'' Coming through. Watch your feet.
:'''Guy''': Hey!
:'''Linda''': Whoops. Sorry.
:'''Gate Guard''': Go ahead. Come in. Wait. Stop, please. Performers only.
:'''Tulio''': Huh? ''[gasps softy]'' ''[chuckles quietly]'' Wow! ''[dressed in a macaw costume; looks in a mirror and makes bird noises]'' Cyanopsitta Spixi. ''[squawking]'' Oh! Oh! ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Tulio!
:'''Tulio''': Oh! ''[nervous chuckle]'' Linda. I was just, uh...
:''[&quot;Say You, Say Me&quot; plays]''
:'''Linda''': I look ridiculous, don't I?
:'''Tulio and Linda''': Ooh!
:'''Tulio''': ''[groaning]''
:'''Linda''': ''[chuckles]'' Sorry.
:'''Tulio''': ''[giggles]'' Oh! The parade, it's about to start.
:'''Gate Guard''': Okay. Boa noite. Go ahead.
:'''Tulio''': ''[whispers]'' Okay, just follow my lead. Act naturally. ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Oh, uh...
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[squawking]'' ''[squawking continues]''
:'''Linda''': Ooh...!
:'''Tulio''': Are you okay?
:'''Linda''': Yeah.
:'''Tulio''': Come on. Blu?
:'''Linda''': Blu?
:'''Tulio''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Linda''': Blu? Blu?
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[speaking Portuguese]''
:'''Linda''': What? W-Wait, wait, no, no, no. I am looking for a blue bird. B-Birdo?
:'''Samba School Director''': Que e que e &quot;birdo&quot;?
:'''Linda''': Birdo, yes.
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[continues in Portuguese]''
:'''Linda''': Oh. Okay. Wait! What are you doing? Tulio! Hey! Let me out!
:'''Tulio''': ''[squawking]'' ''[coughing]'' Whoa, whoa!
:'''Linda''': Tulio! ''[gasps]'' Oh... this is not good. This is not good. This is... Cheese and sprinkles.
:'''Crowd''': ''[singing samba song, percussion booming]''
:'''Linda''': Okay, you can bring me down now! I think we're done here!
:'''Tipa''': ''[In rhythm]'' Hey! Hey! ''[grunting in rhythm]''
:'''Crowd''': Boo! ''[shouting]''
:'''Tipa''': Ha-ha! I think they like my moves! Ha-ha! Hey. Keep dancing egg-boy!
:'''Nigel''': One down, and one to go.
:'''Jewel''': You'll never find him. He's already gone.
:'''Nigel''': Oh, I don't need to find him. He'll find you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Luiz''': Ha-ha! This is the spit! ''[as they arrive at carnival to find Jewel]'' Yeah, baby! Now I can get my freak on!
:'''Blu''': Luiz, please! Rescue first, freak later. ''[gasps]'' Come on!
:'''Luiz''': Out of my way, people!
:'''Guy''': Whoa, whoa, whoa!
:'''Man''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Rafael''': All right, guys, I'll fly ahead and look for Jewel. Hello, ladies.
:'''Pedro''': Mr. Big Nose! Hold up!
:'''Linda''': Uh...
:'''Samba School Director''': Rebola, rebola, rebola!
:'''Linda''': What?
:'''Women''': Rebola!
:'''Tulio''': Linda! Excuse me. Excuse me. Linda! ''[gasps]'' Linda! ''[speaking Portuguese]''
:'''Samba School Director''': Rebola!
:'''Linda''': In English!
:'''Tulio''': Linda, Linda! You've got to shake your tushy!
:'''Linda''': No! We don't shake our tushies in Minnesota!
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[groans]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[barking]''
:'''Women''': ''[yelling]''
:'''Luiz''': Hot dog! Coming through!
:'''Linda''': ''[grunts]'' ''[gasps]'' Blu!
:'''Luiz''': ''[barking]''
:'''Linda''': Tulio! Tulio! I saw Blu!
:'''Tulio''': What?
:'''Samba School Director''': Rebola! Rebola!
:'''Linda''': Hold on, Blu! I'm coming for you!
:'''Tulio''': ''[gasps]'' Meu Deus! ''[My Gosh!]''
:'''Linda''': Whoa! Oh! Oh! Blu! Blu!
:'''Blu''': Linda! Linda? Wait!
:'''All''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Rafael''': ''[Blu and Linda have just noticed each other at the carnival]'' Blu! Blu! We found her!
:'''Pedro''': She's on some, like, weird [[w:chicken|chicken]] float.
:'''Rafael''': Come on!
:'''Blu''': Let's go get Jewel.
:'''Linda''': Wait! Blu! Where are you going?
:'''Man''': Ow!
:'''Men''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Linda''': Whoo!
:'''Man''': Aha!
:'''Linda''': ''[laughs]'' Ahh!
:'''Crowd''': ''[cheering]''
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[shouts in Portuguese]''
:'''Linda''': I saw Blu! He's riding on a bulldog!
:'''Tulio''': What?!
:'''Luiz''': ''[barking]'' ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': There they are, that's the float!
:'''Luiz''': Whoo! That float is a crime in itself! Oh!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Man''': ''[shouting in Portuguese]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[snarling]''
:'''Linda''': There he is!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]'' ''[in the smugglers' float]'' ''[quietly]'' Hey, Jewel?
:'''Jewel''': Blu!
:'''Blu''': I'm gonna let you out of here.
:'''Jewel''': No, no. You can't be here. You have to go. Nigel is...
:''[Suddenly Nigel attacks Blu and throws him in a cage]''
:'''Nigel:''' Hello, pretty bird. So kind of you to join our little soiree.
:'''Blu:''' Oh, come on. You really think I came alone? I got three of the roughest, meanest, craziest birds in all of Rio right behind me.
:'''Pedro:''' Woo-hoo! You hear that, guys?
:''[Blu sees that Nigel has replaced Rafael, Nico, &amp; Pedro in a cage nearby]''
:'''Pedro:''' We're saved! That's right! That's right. That's right.
:'''Nico:''' Uh... I think he means us.
:'''Pedro:''' Oh.
:'''Nigel:''' ''[sighs]'' Ah, love. It's such a powerful and stupid thing.
:'''Marcel:''' ''[Chuckles]'' Yes! Well done Nigel.
:'''Women''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Linda''': Oh! Oh! Out of the way! Sorry. Wait! Wait!
:'''Tipa''': Whoo-hoo! We actually made it! Hey, Marcel! Can we do this again next year? Please? Please? Could I drive next year, too?
:'''Linda''': Wait! Come back! ''[panting]'' Get in!
:'''Luiz''': ''[on top of a carnival float]'' I don't know how I got up here, but I ain't never comin' down! Ah-ah! Woo-hoo! ''[starts dancing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tipa''': ''[to a guilty Fernando as he gives the cage with Rafael, Pedro and Nico in it to him]'' Come on, kid.
:'''Fernando''': ''[to Blu and Jewel]'' I'm gonna get you guys out of here. ''[gasps when Nigel comes down and screeches at him]''
:'''Marcel''': What do you think you're doing?
:'''Fernando''': Uh, nothing.
:'''Marcel''': You shouldn't have done that. ''[Fernando looks sadly back at Jewel as Marcel drags him away, then bites him on the hand to escape]'' Now, come on. ''[grunts]'' Ow! ''[groans]''
:'''Fernando''': ''[panting]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[to Armando]'' Just forget him. Get the birds!
:'''Tulio''': They're getting away.
:'''Linda''': We'll see about that.
:''[The parade float crashes thru the barb wired gates]''
:'''Tulio''': Ahh! Watch out!
:'''Marcel''': We did it, boys!
:'''Armando''': Yes!
:'''Tipa''': Yes, we did it! Ha, ha! We're the best! Ha, ha.
:'''Marcel''': ''[spots the scarlet macaw parade float in front of them]'' Is that, a float?
:'''Tipa''': Wow! Look at the detail on that thing.
:'''Armando''': Ooh!
:'''Marcel''': ''[to Tipa]'' Pull up, you idiot! Pull up!
:''[The plane pulls up as they all scream in which the Plane damages the sun part of the scarlet macaw parade float]''
:'''All''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Tulio''': ''[screams]''
:'''Linda ''[sobbing]''''': Blu! Blu! Oh, Blu. ''[sobbing continues]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rafael''': Sorry, Eva, I'm not gonna be home for dinner.
:''[Rafael, Pedro and Nico soon notice the strap getting hooked onto the fire extinguisher]''
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Jewel''': What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': I'm gonna pop this cage open like a soda can. ''[grunting as he hits the side of the cage four times to get the fire extinguisher to fall to the ground, popping it open]''
:'''Nico''': Now, that's popping!
:'''Blu''': Hurry. We gotta help the others.
:'''Pretty Bird''': I'm a pretty bird, I'm a pretty bird. Who's a pretty bird? I'm a pretty bird. Pretty bird, I'm a pretty bird. ''[hysterical laugh]''
:'''Nico''': Come on!
:'''Pedro''': Yeah!
:'''Rafael''': Hurry up, guys!
:'''Trapped Bird''': I'm out! ''[laughs]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Bat''': Ah! The light!
:'''Blu''': Go! Go! Go!
:'''Pedro''':'' ''Freedom!
:'''All''': ''[yelling and cheering]''
:'''Bird''': Geronimo!
:''[Birds &amp; parrots cheers]''
:'''Jewel''': Come on! Come on! We need to get out!
:'''Blu''': Hey, wait, wait, wait! Wait! ''[pants]''
:'''Jewel''': Um, it's okay. Hey, it's okay. We'll figure this out together. Right? Aah!
:''[after Blu and Jewel have released all the other caged birds, Nigel attacks Blu]''
:'''Jewel''': Let him go!
:''[Nigel hits Jewel away she falls against the wall of the plane and a cage lands on her wing, bruising and injuring it]''
:'''Jewel''': Ow!
:'''Blu''': Jewel!
:'''Jewel''': Ow! My wing.
:'''Nigel''': Oh, pity. Now we have two useless, birds. ''[laughing]''
:''[Blu grabs hold of the hose on the fire extinguisher and attaches it to Nigel's leg]''
:'''Nigel''': Huh?
:'''Blu''': Not cool, man. Not cool!
:''[Blu releases the pressure on the fire extinguisher and Nigel bursts out of the plane]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[screaming]'' Uh-oh. ''[screams]''
:'''Tipa''': Ahh! We're going down! Huh? Okay, okay.
:'''Both''': Rock, paper, scissors...
:'''Marcel''': Chute! Ha, ha! Hasta la vista, losers!
:'''Armando''': [Last Words] Hey! Wait for us! ''[yelling]''
:'''Tipa''':[Last Words] Cannonball!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunting]'' Blu!
:'''Blu''': ''[yells]'' No!
:'''Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:''[Blu jumps out out of the plane and grabs hold of Jewel in the air]''
:'''Blu''': Aah!
:'''Jewel''': Blu! You're crazy! What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': I'm not gonna let you go! We're chained to each other birds, remember?
:''[Jewel kisses Blu, heartbeat heard]''
:'''Jewel''': Blu, you're flying!
:'''Blu''': Yeah! Woo-hoo! I'm flying! I'm really flying! You're right! I'm not an ostrich! I'm not an ostrich!
:'''Jewel''': Whoo-hoo! What--? Aah!
:'''Blu''': Whoa! Wh-wh-wh-whoa! ''[chuckles]''
:'''Boy''': Whoa! Dad! Look!
:'''Tipa''': ''[whimpers]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[Last Words]'' Idiots.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[cuts to the abandoned airport runway where a still sad, Linda, Tulio and Fernando are sitting on an airplane aileron wing]''
:'''Fernando''': ''[spots Blu and Jewel and points out to them]'' Linda!
:'''Linda''': Blu? ''[gasps in joy]'' It's Blu! Look, Tulio, it's Blu! And he's flying. My Blu is flying! He's flying. ''[gasps]''
:''[Linda, Tulio and Fernando run towards Blu as he safely lowers Jewel to the ground. Jewel squawks weakly as Blu looks at Jewel, and Linda bends over and gasps when she sees that Jewel's left wing is injured as Blu looks at her]''
:'''Tulio''': ''[to Jewel]'' Here, let me see. Don't worry. I'll take care of you.
:''[scene then cuts to the jungle on a sanctuary tower where Jewel's wing is done healing and the bandage has just been taken off, Tulio then lets Jewel go and she flies off towards the jungle]''
:''[Linda and Blu both imitate booming explosion, then Blu flies over towards the jungle with Jewel]''
:'''Linda''': That's my big, brave boy.
:''[Linda watches as Blu and Jewel fly away towards the jungle]''
:''[&quot;Real in Rio&quot; Reprise plays]''
:'''Luiz:''' ''[Last line, on a hang-glider]'' I love you, Rio!
:'''Nigel''': ''[growls]'' Ahh! ''[gasps in embarrasment]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[He holding the camera laughs and points at Nigel grabs leave gasps and screaming photographs]''
:'''[The End]'''

== Taglines ==
* Join the party!
* Love at first flight
* Drool meets cool
* Party fowl
* If looks could kill
* 1 out of every 6 is afraid of flying.
* He's going to the wildest, most magical place on Earth... home.

==Voice Cast==
* '''[[w:Anne Hathaway|Anne Hathaway]]''' — Jewel 
* '''[[w:Jesse Eisenberg|Jesse Eisenberg]]''' — Blu  
* '''[[w:George Lopez|George Lopez]]''' — Rafael 
* '''[[w:will.i.am|will.i.am]]''' — Pedro 
* '''[[w:Jamie Foxx|Jamie Foxx]]''' — Nico 
* '''[[w:Tracy Morgan|Tracy Morgan]]''' — Luiz 
* '''[[w:Jemaine Clement|Jemaine Clement]]''' — Nigel 
* '''[[w:Leslie Mann|Leslie Mann]]''' — Linda Gunderson
** '''Sofia Scarpa Saldanha''' (young)
* '''[[w:Rodrigo Santoro|Rodrigo Santoro]]''' — Tulio Monteiro/[[w:Soccer|Soccer]] [[w:Announcer|Announcer]]
* '''[[w:Jake T. Austin|Jake T. Austin]]''' — Fernando
* '''[[w:Bernardo de Paula|Bernardo de Paula]]''' — Sylvio/Kipo (voice)
* '''[[w:Wanda Sykes|Wanda Sykes]]''' — Cole
* '''[[w:Jane Lynch|Jane Lynch]]''' — Alice
* '''[[w:Bebel Gilberto|Bebel Gilberto]]''' — Eva
* '''[[Thomas F. Wilson]]''' — Trapped Bird/Screaming [[w:Hang glider|Hang glider]]
* '''Tim Nordquist''' — Other Hang Glider
* '''[[w:Cindy Slattery|Cindy Slattery]]''' — Neurotic Bird
* '''[[w:Jeffrey Garcia|Jeff Garcia]]''' — Tipa/[[w:Bat|Bat]]
* '''[[w:Karen Disher|Karen Disher]]''' — Mother Bird
* '''[[w:Francisco Ramos|Francesco Ramos]]''' — Mauro A.K.A: Lead [[w:Marmoset|Marmoset]]
* '''[[w:Miriam Wallen|Miriam Wallen]]''' — Unnamed Green Bird
* '''Justine Warwick''' — Scaredy Bird
* '''[[w:Carlos Ponce|Carlos Ponce]]''' — Marcel 
* '''Davi Vieira''' — Armando
* '''[[w:Phil Miler|Phil Miler]]''' — Avary intern, [[w:Waiter|1st Waiter]]
* '''[[w:Carlos Saldanha|Carlos Saldanha]]''' — [[w:Waiter|2nd Waiter]]
* '''[[w:Renato D'Angelo|Renato D'Angelo]]''' — Policeman
* '''[[w:Kelly Keaton|Kelly Keaton]]''' — [[w:Bookstore|Bookstore]] Customer/Lady [[w:Tourist|Tourist]]
* '''[[w:Judah Friedlander|Judah Friedlander]]''' — Unnamed Tourist
* '''[[w:Ester Dean|Ester Dean]]''' — Boy in [[w:Gondola Lift|Gondola]]
* '''[[w:Carlos de Oliveira|Carlos de Oliveira]]''' — Gate Guard
* '''[[w:Sergio Mendes|Sergio Mendes]]''' — [[w:Samba School|Samba School]] Director
* '''[[w:Jason Fricchione|Jason Fricchione]]''' — [[w:Truck driver|Truck driver]]

==See also ==
*''[[Rio 2]]''
*''[[Rio 2#Sequel|Rio 3]]''

== External links ==
{{wikipedia|Rio (2011 film)}}

{{Rio}}

{{Authority control}}


[[Category:2011 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2011 American animated films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American animated feature films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:American animated romance films]]
[[Category:Films about parrots and macaws]]
[[Category:Films set in Rio de Janeiro (city)]]
[[Category:Films set in Brazil]]
[[Category:Films directed by Carlos Saldanha]]
[[Category:Films about birds]]
[[Category:Animated films about couples]]
[[Category:Films about animal cruelty]]
[[Category:Films about animal rights]]
[[Category:Films about abduction]]
[[Category:Animated films set in South America]]
[[Category:Blue Sky Studios]]</text>
      <sha1>84uw1oskpvd9sgbxs8ntfdxkl3pefqd</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965136</id>
      <parentid>3965135</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:12:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965136</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="79385" sha1="0h2v7ttph2t45b2qqmc0njil6h5pga6" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Rio (2011 film)|Rio]]''''' is a 2011 American animated [[w:musical film|musical]] [[w:comedy film|comedy film]] produced by [[w:Blue Sky Studios|Blue Sky Studios]] and directed by [[w:Carlos Saldanha|Carlos Saldanha]]. The title refers to the [[Brazil]]ian city of [[w:Rio de Janeiro|Rio de Janeiro]], where the film is set. The film features features the voices of [[Anne Hathaway]], [[w:Jesse Eisenberg|Jesse Eisenberg]], [[w:will.i.am|Will.i.am]], [[w:Jamie Foxx|Jamie Foxx]], [[w:George Lopez|George Lopez]], [[w:Tracy Morgan|Tracy Morgan]], [[w:Jemaine Clement|Jemaine Clement]], [[w:Leslie Mann|Leslie Mann]], [[w:Rodrigo Santoro|Rodrigo Santoro]] and [[w:Jake T. Austin|Jake T. Austin]]. It tells the story of Blu, a male blue macaw who gets taken back to Rio de Janeiro and mates with a female, a free-spirited macaw, named Jewel.  The two eventually fall in love, and together they have to escape from being smuggled by Nigel, a cockatoo. The theme song, '''Telling the World''' was sung by Taio Cruz.

[[w:20th Century Fox|20th Century Fox]] released the film on March 22, 2011 in Brazil, and on April 15, 2011 in the United States.
{{center|'''Join the party!'''([[taglines]])}}

== Dialogue ==
:'''Mother Bird''': Hey!
:'''Red Bird''': ''E'a Ilha diz!''
:''[&quot;Real in Rio&quot; plays]''
:'''Young Blu''': ''[frightened yelp]''
:''[&quot;Whoomp! (There It Is)&quot; by Tag Team playing]''
:'''Bird''': ''[sighs]'' ''[chirping]'' ''[sighs]''
:'''Truck Driver''': ''[screams]''
:'''Bird''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Young Linda''': ''[gasps]'' It's okay. It's okay. Shh. I'll take care of you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[At Present Day]''
:'''Linda''': ''[groaning]'' Stupid clock. ''[grunting]'' Huh? ''[chuckles]'' Good morning, Blu.
:'''Blu''': ''[water swishing]'' ''[gargling]''
:'''Linda''': ''[apits]''
:'''Blu''': ''[belches]''
:'''Linda''': Ew! Ooh! Come here. Tyler Blu Gunderson! You know these vitamins are good for you. ''[gasps]'' Ooh. What's this?
:'''Blu''': ''[squwaks]''
:'''Linda''': Gotcha. Whoo!
:'''Blu and Linda''': ''[imitate booming explosion]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Linda''': Enjoy the new book.
:'''Bookstore Customer''': Thanks, Linda.
:'''Linda''': Bye, now. Yes, Mom, I'd to visit. But who would take care of Blu? Mom, they don't have kennel's for parrots. Here's your hot chocolate, Blu.
:'''Blu''': ''[quawks]''
:'''Linda''': Just how you like it. Plus, I don't trust leaving Blu with just anyone. No, I don't have a bird-sitter...
:'''Blu''': ''[Linda places his hot chocolate in front of him]'' Ah. This is the life. ''[sniffs]'' The perfect marshmallow-to-cocoa ratio. ''[counting the marshmallows]'' One, two, three, four, five... ''[another marshmallow floats to the surface]'' six. Mmm. ''[takes a sip of his cocoa]''
:'''Alice''': ''[laughter]''
:'''Chloe''': Well, well, if it isn't my favorite nerd bird.
:'''Blu''': Very... very funny. Real mature.
:'''Alice''': Hey, pet! Where you migrating to this year, huh? The breakfast nook?
:'''Alice and Chloe''': ''[laughing]''
:''[Chloe and Alice laugh and throw another snowball at the window]''
:'''Blu''': Throw all the snowballs you want. I'm protected by this magical force field called glass. It's what keeps us so toasty and warm in here while you guys are out there freezing your...
:'''Alice''': ''[singsongy]'' La, la, la, la, la! ''[laughing]''
:''[looks up and sees Chloe and Alice showing their behinds to him, making fun]''
:'''Blu''': Classy.
:'''Tulio''': ''[gasping]'' Arara! Arara! Arara! Ara... ''[yelling]'' ''[groaning]''
:'''Linda''': Are you all right?
:'''Tulio''': ''[groans]'' ''[shivering]'' I'm not really built for this weather.
:'''Linda''': Oh. Are you looking for some books?
:'''Tulio''': Books? No. ''[chuckling]'' No. I have come 6,000 miles looking for him.
:'''Blu''': ''[confused grunt]''
:'''Linda''': Doctor of ornithology?
:'''Tulio''': Ooh. He's magnificent. ''[imitates birdcalls]''
:'''Blu''': Linda, little help here. Linda?
:'''Tulio and Blu''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Wow. You're actually communicating.
:'''Tulio''': Yes. Yes. I introduced myself and shook my tail feathers counter-clockwise, thus deffering to his dominance.
:'''Blu''': I did not get that at all.
:'''Linda''': So, Dr. Monteiro, you...
:'''Tulio''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, no &quot;Doctor,&quot; please. Just call me Tulio. You know, your macaw is a very special bird. In fact, as far as we know, Blu is the last male of his kind.
:'''Linda''': Really?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. And recently, we found a female, and our hope is to bring the two of them together to save their species.
:'''Blu''': ''[gulps]''
:'''Linda''': Oh. Well, yeah, sure. When can she come over?
:'''Tulio''': Oh, no, no, no. She is in Brazil. Blu must come to Rio de Janeiro.
:'''Linda''': ''[laughs]'' Rio? Brazil?
:'''Blu''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Linda: '''Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I never let Blu out of my sight. He needs me.
:'''Tulio''': Oh, no. You... you misunderstood. It's all arranged. You will be with him every stop of the way. And I will be with you.
:'''Linda''': Um, look, I know you're doing your job, but I can't... Well, Blu is very particular, and we have our little routine here, and we're not big on travel. Heck, he doesn't fly.
:'''Tulio''': But, of course he can fly. ''[takes Blu and inspects him]'' He's a perfect specimen.
:'''Blu''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Uh, what are you doing?
:'''Tulio''': Don't worry. Their natural instincts always take over.
:''[He lets Blu go so that he will fly, but falls due to not having enough endurance]''
:'''Linda''': Wait! Wait, wait! No! No!
:'''Blu''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Tulio''': Well, almost always.
:'''Linda''': Blu!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]'' What kind of doctor are you?
:'''Linda''': Are you okay?
:'''Tulio''': Perhaps he's too domesticated.
:'''Linda''': It was very nice of you to stop in and squawk around and throw my bird, but now it's time for you to go.
:'''Tulio''': Well, I... I'm very sorry. I... I'm very sorry, but... wait, wait. Linda. Linda. ''[Linda walks him out of the shop]'' This could be our last chance.
:'''Linda''': Have a safe flight. ''[sighs]''
:''[she shuts her shop door in his face and walks away]''
:'''Tulio''': Linda, please, listen to me. If we don't do this, his whole species will be gone. ''[He throws his business card through the door post flap]'' Just think about it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': &quot;Natural instincts.&quot; ''[scoffs]'' There's nothing natural about being thrown halfway across a room. Well, I'll show him. Hmm. ''[reading a book about flying]'' I can do this. I just have to work out the physics. I have quadrated my vector angles. I have adjusted for wind shear. Positive reinforcement. Good. Okay. Let's see. Flaps open.[opens his wings] Perfect. Landing gear. ''[wiggles his claws]'' Check. Tail flaps. ''[flaps his tail]'' Operational. And, actually, not bad. ''[as he prepares to fly for the first time]'' This is it. Let's fly. Just keep it simple. Thrust, lift, drag and weight. Thrust, lift, drag, weight. ''[speeds up to get off the table]'' Thrust, lift, drag, weight. Thrust, lift, drag... W-w-w-wait! ''[gets scared and tries to stop himself, but instead falls from the table]'' ''[screams]'' ''[sighs, screams]'' Ow!
:'''Linda''': Blu? ''[To Blu]'' I promised I would always look out for you, didn't I? And have I ever broken a promise? ''[Blu looks at Linda in worry]'' I'm scared, too, but I wouldn't make you do this if it wasn't the right thing to do. What do you say, Blu?
:'''Linda and Blu''': ''[mitate booming explosion]''
:''[she holds out her hand in a punch, Blu touches his beak and punches his claw to her hand in agreement]''
:'''Linda''': That's my big, brave boy. And we'll be back before we even know it.
:''[&quot;Let Me Take You to Rio (Blu's Arrival)&quot; plays]''
:'''Linda''': Your turn, Blu. You don't want to get beak-burn.
:'''Blu''': ''[frightened gasp]''
:'''Linda''': Whoa! What's going on here?
:'''Tulio''': You arrived in time for Carnival.
:'''Linda''': Carnival?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. It's the biggest party in the world. You know, a time to have fun and dance. ''[imitates rhythmic drumming]''
:'''Linda''': ''[laughs]'' Oh, my. Is she a performer?
:'''Tulio''': No. In fact, she's my dentist. Dr. Barbosa!
:'''Dentist Barbosa''': Oy! Don't forget to floss, Tulio. ''[laughs]''
:'''Tulio''': You got it! Come tomorrow night, everyone will be dressed like that.
:'''Linda:''' ''[chuckles]'' Not me.
:'''Nico:''' ♪Oba, la, la, la, ya E, e, ei!♪ ''E ai?'' Tudo bom?
:'''Blu:''' Oh. Um, oh, right. Uh, yeah. Aah! Uh... ''[slowly]'' ''[Nico and Pedro approach Blu]'' I am not from here.
:'''Pedro''': Hey, Nico. He's a tourist.
:'''Nico''': Funny, you don't look like one.
:'''Blu''': Really? I... I don't.
:'''Pedro''': Except you got pigeon doo-doo on your nose.
:''[Blu wipes the sun cream from his beak]''
:'''Blu''': Oh, oh, oh, no, this is just SPF 3,000.
:'''Nico''': So are you here for Carnival?
:'''Blu''': Oh, actually, I'm just here to meet a... a girl.
:'''Nico''': Oh, a girl!
:'''Pedro''': Yes.
:'''Nico''': Little word of advice: you make the first move. Brazilian ladies respond to confidence.
:'''Blu''': Oh, right.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, it's all about swagger. You got to puff out that chest. Mmm! Swing that tail. ''[makes swishing noise]'' Eyes narrow, like some kind of crazy love hawk. ''[squawks]''
:'''Nico''': But, first, we got to bust you out.
:'''Blu''': What?
:'''Pedro''': Yeah! I'm-a pop that cage open like a soda can.
:''[Pedro tries desperately to break the metal bar on the cage Blu's in]''
:'''Blu''': No, no, no. Whoa! No, no, no, that's okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa!
:'''Pedro''': ''[grunting]'' You call that popping? Whew. This thing's robust.
:'''Blu''': No, no, no. No, guys., really. I'm fine. This cage is great. Love this cage.
:''[Pedro, exhausted, stops pounding the metal bar]''
:'''Pedro''': Ta bom. Suit yourself. Hey, don't forget-- love hawk. ''[squawks]'' ''[he squawks and flies away with Nico]'' Bemvindo!
:'''Blu''': Yes. Yes, bem... ''[stammers]'' And... and to you, as well.

&lt;hr width+&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tulio''': This is the heart and soul of our aviary-- our treatment room. ''[imitates birdcalls]''
:'''Linda''': They really like you. Oh! ''[chuckles]'' A lot.
:'''Tulio''': Yes. I'm their great, big mama bird.
:'''Blu''': Ew.
:'''Linda''': ''[chuckles]'' Wow.
:'''Tulio''': Want some?
:'''Linda''': Ah! Oh, I'm, good.
:'''Tulio''': Many of the birds here were rescued from smugglers.
:'''Linda''': Smugglers?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. And, unfortunately, the poor birds are often hurt or even killed in the process. But with proper care, they can be saved. Look here. This poor guy was found last night.
:'''Nigel''': ''[weak squawking]''
:'''Tulio''': Hey, buddy. You're looking great today. Much better. Much better.
:'''Blu''': Get well soon.
:'''Nigel''': ''[growls]''
:'''Blu''': ''[nervously]'' Oh.
:'''Linda''': ''[in the bird sanctuary]'' So, where's Jewel?
:'''Tulio''': Oh, we have a special place for Jewel. She's a very spirited bird.
:'''Aviary Intern''': ''[groans]'' I'll say.
:''[he turns and his face is covered in scratches and bruises]''
:'''Blu''': She did that? Oh, charming. Okay, I want to go home now. ''[squawking]''
:'''Tulio''': No, no, don't worry. I'm going to make you look irresistible.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts, pants]'' Help! Help! Let me out of here! ''[gasps]'' Linda!
:'''Linda''': Maybe I should...
:'''Tulio''': No, no. Give it a chance.
:'''Blu''': ''[gulps]'' Hello? Whoa! Hello? ''[gasps]'' Uh... I come in peace. ''[gasps]'' Whoa. ''[as he sets eyes on Jewel for the first time]'' She's beautiful. ''[Blu is mesmerized as she flies towards him]'' What were they talking about? She's... she's like an angel. An angel who's getting really close... Aah! ''[suddenly Jewel crashes into him]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[to Blu, after she has pinned him down in the bird sanctuary]'' Quem é você? Quê que você está fazendo aqui?
:'''Blu''': ''[gagging, indistinct babbling]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[Blu tries to speak as Jewel is standing on him with one clawed talon holding his throat]'' Quê?
:'''Blu''': You're standing on my throat.
:''[she gets off him]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh, you're an American.
:'''Blu''': ''[clears throat]'' Thanks. I need my throat for talking, so thank you.
:'''Jewel''': You look like me.
:'''Blu''': Oh. Uh, hi. ''[clears throat]'' Hi. My name is Blu. You know, like the cheese. With the mold on it. You know, that smells really bad. ''[to himself as he realizes what he's just said]'' That's stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
:'''Jewel''': All right, come on. We don't have much time.
:'''Blu''': ''[chuckles nervously]'' Whoa! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. ''[groans]''
:'''Jewel''': Are you ready?
:'''Blu''': For what? ''[he suddenly thinks she's referring to them mating]'' Oh, oh, wow. Uh, okay. ''[to himself]'' Confidence. ''[inhales]'' Crazy love hawk.
:'''Jewel''': All right.
:''[Blu tries to kiss Jewel]''
:'''Blu''': ''[smooching]''
:'''Jewel''': Whoa. Hey. ''[She pushes him away]'' What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': What? What... what you wanted me to. But, just for argument's sake, uh, what are... what are you doing?
:'''Jewel''': I'm trying to escape.
:''[She points to the air conditioning vent]''
:'''Blu''': Oh. Uh, yeah, escape. That-that's where I was going with that thing I just did.
:'''Jewel''': Wait. W-w-w-wait. Did you actually think we were going to kiss?
:'''Blu''': No. No-no-no-no. It's not what you think.
:'''Jewel''': We just met! ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Oh, my.
:'''Tulio''': I think they need a little help.
:'''Blu''': I mean, I know how my feathers look, but I'm not that kind of bird. ''[just then a disco ball comes down, the lights are dimmed and Lionel Richie's 'Say you, Say me' starts playing]''
:''[&quot;Say You Say Me&quot; plays]''
:'''Blu''': Okay, I had nothing to do with that. But, huh, you have to admit it's actually a pretty good song. ''[Jewel gives him a look as he starts singing to the music]'' Yeah, sing it, Lionel. ''[screams and yells]'' ''[grunting]''
:''[Jewel suddenly jumps onto him]''
:'''Linda''': ''[Linda watches on the monitor as Blu and Jewel struggle, thinking they're mating]'' Wow. That was fast.
:'''Tulio''': Lionel Richie, works every time. We should probably give them privacy.
:'''Linda''': I'm not sure I should leave Blu here alone.
:'''Tulio''': Oh, no, no, no. Don't worry. Sylvio will keep an eye on them all night. Besides, he's got Jewel.
:'''Blu''': ''[screaming and grunting]'' Help me! ''[grunts]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Man (on radio)''': Boa noite, Rio! This is the final countdown to Carnaval! Let's samba.
:'''Sylvio''': ''[hums]'' Whoo! ''[humans]'' Ah! ''[humming]'' Huh?
:'''Nigel''': ''[pained chirping]''
:'''Sylvio''': Aw. Come here, poor little birdie. Aw, It's okay. I got you. I got you. ''[muffled shouting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[groans]'' Excuse me. Please. I am trying to sleep.
:'''Jewel''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, I'm sorry, sleepyhead. I'm trying to escape. ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': Escape? Why? The cage is awesome.
:'''Jewel''': The cage... ''[laughs]'' Oh, what was I thinking? I wouldn't expect a pet to understand.
:'''Blu''': Pet? Did you just call me a pet? For the record, I am not a pet. I am a companion. And you know what? Do whatever you want, 'cause tomorrow morning, Linda will come for me and this whole nightmare will be over.
:'''Jewel''': Incredible. You would rather be with a-a-a human than your own kind.
:'''Blu''': Well, that human has given me love and affection for the 15 years, whereas my own kind tried to strangle me after 15 seconds!
:'''Jewel''': Yeah, well, because of them, I've lost everything. You can't trust them. ''[gasps]''
:'''Blu''': Of course, you can trust humans. ''[he hears Jewel make a noise]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': Jewel? Jewel. ''[he sees a boy hover over him]'' Oh. Hi, there. ''[yells]'' ''[A boy named fernando. He puts a bag over Blu's head]''
:'''All''': ''[laughter, festive chatter]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tulio''': It was nice of you to join me for dinner. I often eat alone. Oh, uh, because, of course, my work.
:'''Linda''': ''[chuckles]'' I thought I was the best nut, until I met you.
:'''Tulio''': Yes. Right. Do you have a favorite bird?
:'''Linda''': Well, obviously, I'm a blue macaw kind of gal.
:'''Tulio''': ''[chuckles]'' That makes sense. They are very handsome birds.
:'''Linda''': Actually, it's the brains I'm more attracted to. I'm not so impressed by fancy feathers.
:'''Tulio''': I know exactly what you mean. My favorite bird is the spotted owl. I've always been mesmerized by those big, round, intelligent eyes.'' ''[he looks at Linda's eyes which are big, round, and intelligent-looking]''
:'''Waiter''': Ha ha! Picanha!
:'''Linda''': ''[screams]''
:'''Second Waiter''': Chicken hearts? Flambada!
:'''Linda''': Oh! Ooh! ''[chuckles]'' Chicken hearts. ''[laughs nervously]'' Oh, gosh. Ahh! Oh! ''[blowing]''
:'''Tulio''': Oh. ''[chuckles]'' Hello?
:'''Linda''': ''[sobbing; Blu and Jewel is gone]'' Oh, Blu. We should have never left Moose Lake. ''[Tulio opens and closes the door]'' This is all my fault.
:'''Tulio''': No, no, Linda. Linda, please. ''[crying after finding out Blu has been taken]'' This is not your fault.
:'''Linda''': ''[sniffles]'' You're right. It's not my fault. ''[She puts on her glasses and lashes out at Tulio]'' It's *your* '''FAULT!!'''
:'''Tulio''': What the...?
:'''Linda''': With your little bird talk and that whole &quot;saves the species&quot;. Well, you know what? '''''SQUAWK, SQUAWKETY, SQUAWK, SQUAWK!''''' ''[Realizes what she said; covers her mouth]'' ''[realizing what she's done]'' ''[gasps]'' I'm sorry. I didn't mean to curse.
:'''Tulio''': I... I don't understand. Sylvio is the best guard in the business.
:'''Police Officer''': ''[Linda and Tulio watch as Sylvio gets questioned by a police officer]'' So let me get this straight. You were attacked by a little white bird?
:'''Sylvio''': Yes, with this rag. ''[he holds up a small white rag]'' He held it to my mouth like... like this. ''[muffled babbling]''
:'''Police Officer''': ''[sniffing]'' ''[sighs]''
:''[he holds the rag against his mouth, takes a breath and faints to the ground; the police officer catches the rag, takes a sniff of it and also faints]''
:'''Linda''': We're doomed.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': ''[Blu chants to himself with fear whilst trapped in a cage]'' Okay. Okay. There's no place like home. There's no place like home. Oh, how I wish I was back in my own cage, with my mirror and my swing and my little bell. Oh, how I miss my little bell.
:'''Jewel''': Shh! Play dead.
:''[She drops to the floor of the cage]''
:'''Blu''': What? I don't need to play dead. I'm about to have a heart attack.
:'''Jewel''': Just do it!
:'''Blu''': ''[sighs]'' Fine. ''[moans]'' ''[gagging]'' ''[grunting]''
:''[he fakes a fall and starts twitching]''
:'''Jewel''': Stop twitching.
:'''Blu''': Oh, come on. It's the twitching that sells it.
:'''Jewel''': Shh!
:'''Armando''':[First Words] Come on in, kid.
:'''Marcel''': ''[a boy places the cage holding Blu and Jewel on the table in front of Marcel]''[First Words] Well, what do you know? Good work, Fernando. You see, boys? What did I tell you about this one?
:'''Tipa''':[First Words] That you were going to pay him half as much as you said? ''[Marcel slaps Tipa in the face to shut him up]'' Ow!
:'''Marcel''': No, you idiot. That he reminds me of myself when I was that age. Sweet, resourceful. Here you go, kid. ''[he hands the boy some money]''
:'''Fernando''': Hey. This is only half of what you promised me.
:'''Marcel''': Ah, shut up, kid. ''[takes the cover off the cage to see Blu and Jewel looking dead]'' What the...? ''[he picks up Jewel]'' I thought I told you I needed these birds alive. Tell me, Fernando, does this look alive to you? Huh?
:''[Jewel bites Marcel's thumb and flies away]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[squwaks]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[screams]'' Get her!
:'''Armando''': Come over here!
:'''Armando and Tipa''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': Jewel!
:'''Jewel''': ''[panting]''
:'''Marcel''': Come here!
:'''Jewel''': ''[pants, screams]''
:'''Nigel''':[First Words] Hello, pretty bird. What's the matter? Cockatoo got your throat?
:'''Marcel''': Nigel! Alive.
:'''Nigel''': To be continued.
:'''Tipa''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[groans, sighs]''
:'''Blu''': ''[after Jewel has been caught and placed back in the cage with Blu]'' That was your plan-- to take off and leave me? Gee, thanks.
:'''Jewel''': Well, why didn't you follow me?
:'''Blu''': Uh... ''[doesn't reply as he's too embarrassed to admit he doesn't fly yet]''
:'''Marcel''': Nice work, Nigel.
:'''Tipa''': Yeah, nice work, Nigel.
:'''Marcel''': The last blue macaws on Earth. ''[laughs]'' These are worth a fortune. Hey, Fernando. Hang these up in the other room.
:'''Scaredy Bird''': Hey, Birdy. Let me out. Let me out! Let me out of here!!!
:'''Neurotic Bird''': Who's a pretty bird? I'm a pretty bird. Pretty bird. I'm a pretty bird. ''[laughs]'' I'm a pretty bird.
:'''Bat''': ''[Dracula voice]'' I was framed! They got the wrong guy!
:'''Fernando''': Sorry, guys. Nothing personal. So, what's going to happen to them?
:'''Marcel''': Don't worry. We're going to find good homes for them. Now, go home to your mama.
:'''Fernando''': But I don't have a mama.
:'''Marcel''': Father?
:'''Armando''': Brother?
:'''Tipa''': Goldfish? Aw. Can we keep him, boss?
:'''Marcel''': No! ''[he shuts the door in Fernando's face]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[hearing Marcel talking to his men through the door]'' So, Marcel, what's really going to happen to those birds?
:'''Marcel''': Ugh! Plucked, stuffed, eaten. Who cares? All I know is we're going to be rich.
:'''All''': ''[evilly laughing]''
:'''Armando''': We're gonna be rich!
:'''Fernando''': ''[grunts, groans]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Announcer''': ''[speaking Portuguese]''
:'''Armando''': Come on! The game's starting.
:'''Marcel''': Yes, you were very clear. Tomorrow, or the deal is off. Of course I have both the macaws. Yes, I will deliver them myself. Goodbye. All right, you two. You load the truck tonight. First thing, in the morning, we bring those birds to the airport. You got it?
:'''Armando''': Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah, uh-huh.
:'''Tipa''': Oh, yeah. All right. Heard you.
:'''Marcel''': Oh. And one of you feed Nigel.
:'''Tipa and Armando''': ''[gulp]'' Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.
:'''Tipa''': Yes!
:'''Armando''': Uh-uh. Scissors cuts rock.
:'''Tipa''': Oh, man. How come you always win? ''[nervous grunting]'' Nice birdie. ''[whimpering]'' Yeah, here you go.
:'''Nigel''': ''[shrieks]''
:'''Tipa''': Aah!
:'''Armando''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[sighs, grunts]'' Ugh! Cannibal.
:'''Blu''': ''[trapped in their cage in a room full of the other trapped animals]'' Okay, pull it together. The key is not to panic.
:'''Jewel''': I'm not panicking.
:'''Blu''': I wasn't talking to you; I was talking to me. But it's okay, because any minute now, Linda will find us.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, great. And then she'll stick us behind another set of bars, right?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Uh, I mean, no.
:'''Jewel''': Look, pet, cages might work for you, but I don't want to belong to anyone.
:'''Birds''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[smacking lips]'' Something seems to be lodged in my beak. Would you mind?
:'''Bird''': ''[whimpering]'' ''[screams]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[laughing]''
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]'' Ow!
:'''Nigel''': ''[jumping onto the cage Blu and Jewel are being held in]'' Oh, I know I'm not a pretty birdie, but I used to be quite a looker. A star. Lights, camera, action.
:''[&quot;Pretty Bird&quot; plays]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': Hey!
:'''Nigel''': Sweet nightmares. ''[laughing]'' ''[laughs wickedly and flies away]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': Not cool, man! Scary, but not cool. Hey, are you okay?
:''[She starts throwing herself at the cage bars]''
:'''Jewel''': No, I am definitely not okay!
:'''Blu''': Whoa! Whoa, whoa, wait, wait. What are you doing?
:'''Jewel''': Getting out of here. ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Are you going to help me or what?
:'''Blu''': Actually, all the survival guides say to sit and wait... Ow! ...and help will come.
:'''Jewel''': No one is coming!
:''[She throws herself more violently at the cage]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': We are on our own, and if we just sit here, we're going to die!
:'''Blu''': ''[screams]''
:'''Tipa and Armando''': Yes! Yes! Yes!
:''[Sportscast plays in Portuguese]''
:'''Tipa and Armando''': No!
:'''Tipa''': Nigel, get out of the way!
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Armando''': Yeah! Hold on!
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as Jewel is continuing to throw herself around the cage]'' Stop, stop. Why don't you just open the door? ''[he slides open the cage door with his beak]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[panting]'' Are you kidding me?
:'''Blu''': What? It's just a standard flip slide bolt. Just rotate...
:'''Jewel''': Come on! Let's fly! ''[screams]'' ''[Jewel flies out of the cage and grabs hold of Blu, but Blu grabs the cage with his beak]'' What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': Oh, I can't...
:'''Jewel''': What? You can't what?
:''[Marcel's men open the door to catch them in the act of escaping and Blu lets go of the cage]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa and Armando''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[shrieks]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]'' Whoa! I can't fly!
:''[they both fall onto a washline and start sliding across it]''
:'''Jewel''': You couldn't tell me this before now?
:'''Blu''': It didn't matter before now! ''[muffled grunting]''
:''[they crash into a wall]''
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[holler, grunt]''
:'''Jewel''': I hate you.
:'''Both''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[after they crash land to the ground]'' Is there anything else I need to know?
:'''Blu''': Yes. I can't fly, I pick my beak. And once in a while, I pee in the birdbath. Happy?
:'''Armando''': There they are!
:'''Jewel''': We got to get out of here!
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Move! Come on, just move! Move!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[gasping and grunting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as they're trying to get away from Marcel's men]'' Wait. Wait. Listen to me. Flying may not be my thing, but walking is. Follow my lead. Inside leg, outside leg. ''[he starts leading the way walking]''
:'''Jewel''': Yeah. Yeah, okay. I got it.
:'''Blu''': Inside, outside.
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside, inside, outside!
:'''Blu''': Inside, outside.
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside.
:'''Crowd''': Yes! Yes! Yes!
:'''Tipa''': Huh? Yes! Yes!
:'''Armando''': Come on!
:'''Tipa''': Ow!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[barks like dog]''
:'''Cat''': ''[Meowing]''
:'''Armando and Tipa''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Blu''': See? I'm bilingual, too!
:'''Nigel''': ''[fierce squawking]''
:''[Jewel and Blu are running away from Nigel]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[as they are running away from Marcel's men]'' ''[panting]'' ''[she and Blu are running away from Nigel]'' Oh, this is great. I'm chained to the only bird in the world who can't fly.
:'''Blu''': Actually, there are about 40 species of flightless birds.
:'''Jewel''': ''[notices a box]'' Duck!
:'''Blu''' No, [[w:Duck|ducks]] can fly.
:'''Jewel''': ''[notices a crate]'' No! Duck! ''[referring to them ducking under a cart they're about to encounter]''
:'''Blu''': Ahh! Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Guy''': Oh! Whoa!
:'''Girl''': Whoo! Yay!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': ''[hollering]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawking]''
:'''Jewel''': Whoa!
:'''Man''': ''[speaking Portuguese on TV]''
:'''Crowd''': Yes!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Crowd''': Yes!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Crowd''': Yes!
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Crowd''': Yes! Yes!
:'''Blu''': Hold on!
:'''Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Nigel''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Announcer''': ''[shouting]''
:'''Crowd''': No! No!
:'''Chicken''': ''[clucking]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[groaning]'' Get out of here, you putrid poultry! ''[groans]'' Ahh! Ow! Ah!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunts, sighs]'' ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''':  ''[confused and step on a stick]'' Ooh, ooh. What was that?
:'''Jewel''': A stick.
:'''Blu''': ''[asked and hit something]'' Ah! And that?
:'''Jewel''': ''[calmly and kept walking]'' It's just a rock.
:'''Blu''': Oh, right. Yeah. ''[Blu stops and shudders as he feels something on his back]'' ''[whimpers]'' Is that a spider on my back?
:'''Jewel''': Will you quit it? It's just a leaf. Turn around. ''[Blu turns and we see a huge spider on his back]'' ''[gulps]'' Um... ''[Jewel quickly hits the spider off of Blu's back]'' ''[grunts]'' Leaf. Told you. Now, uh, just come on. We need to find a safe place to spend the night.
:'''Blu''': Safe? Safe? We are in the jungle. You know when people say, &quot;It's a jungle out there&quot;? Well, I'm pretty sure they don't mean it as a good thing.
:'''Jewel''': Look, I hate to break it to you, but this is where our kind naturally lives.
:'''Blu''': Hey, hey, don't talk to me about nature. I watch Animal Planet. I know all about the food chain. ''[just then a bug flying by gets eaten by a frog A snake]'' Ah! Ahh! You see? You see? Out here, I'm just an hor d'oeuvres. Nothing more than a feathery spring roll.
:'''Jewel''': That is why we stay in the trees and not on the ground. ''[pointing to a large tree ahead of them]'' After you. ''[pointing to a man-made tree house]''
:'''Blu''': Oh. No. I don't think so. Nuh-uh. No. I would feel much more confortable in something man-made. Um... Hey. How about up there?
:'''Jewel''': I can't believe I have to drag your clumsy butt up there.
:'''Blu''': Drag me? ''[scoffs]'' Watch and learn.
:'''Jewel''': Oh! Blu! Oh! Just wait one... ''[gasps]'' Blu! Ha!
:'''Blu''': Who's dragging whose butt now, huh?
:'''Jewel''': Ha ha. Very funny. ''[laughing]'' Oh! ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as Blu reaches the top of the tree house]'' You see? Who needs flying?
:'''Jewel''': Birds. Birds need flying. Flying is... it's freedom and-and not having to rely on anyone. Don't you want that?
:'''Blu''': Mmm, I don't know. Sounds a little lonely. Uh... uh, I'm probably going to be up for a little while, muh, 'cause I'm-I'm still on Minnesota time.
:'''Jewel''': Good night.
:'''Blu''': Good night, Jewel. ''[looks out into the sky]'' Good night, Linda.
:'''Linda''': Excuse me, Sir? Have you seen my bird? Have... have you seen my bird?
:'''Woman''': Mm-mm.
:'''Linda''': ''[sighs]'' Excuse me. Um, have you seen my bird? Ma'am? ''[snoring]'' Mmm. Have you seen my bird? ''[indistinct mumbling]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fernando''': Lady! American lady!
:'''Linda''': ''[gasps]'' Blu? Blu?
:'''Tulio''': Ah! Where? ''[clears throat]'' Oh!
:'''Fernando''': ''[gasps]'' Wow. I know where your birds are.
:'''Linda''': You found Blu? Are you sure? ''[gasps]'' It's his!
:'''Tulio''': Let me see that. ''[babbling]'' ''[slurping]'' Hmm. You're right.
:'''Linda''': Okay. Where is he?
:'''Fernando''': Come on. Let's go. I'll take you to him.
:'''Tulio''': No, no, no. Linda, Linda, wait. We don't know this boy. We can't trust him.
:'''Linda''': I have to trust him. I don't have a choice.
:'''Chickens''': ''[clucking]''
:'''Armando''': ''[clears throat]''
:'''Marcel''': Do you think. I am an idiot?
:'''Tipa''': Uh...
:'''Marcel''': They were two birds, chained together, in a cage. HOW COULD YOU LOSE THEM!
:'''Tipa''': They outsmarted us, boss. But-But don't worry. We'll get them back. I have a plan.
:'''Marcel''': Oh, great. What are you going to do, wander the city calling, &quot;Here, birdie, birdie. Here, birdie&quot;?
:'''Tipa''': Well, anything sounds dumb when you say it like that. ''[groans]''
:'''Armando''': ''[laughs]''
:'''Marcel''': Okay. We have to get the birds to the airport tonight.
:'''Tipa''': But it's Carnival. All the roads will be blocked by the parade.
:'''Marcel''': And that's why I wanted to go this morning! Nigel! ''[Nigel flies over onto Marcel's shoulder]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Marcel''': This bird is ten times smarter than the two of you combined.
:'''Tipa''': Yeah, well, if he's so smart, then why don't you put him in charge?
:'''Marcel''': I am putting him in charge.
:'''Armando''': ''[to Tipa]'' Stop suggesting things!
:'''Marcel''': Go find them nigel. ''[Nigel flies out of the window in search of Blu and Jewel]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[gasps]''
:''[Nigel flies out of the window in search of Blu and Jewel]''
:'''Marcel''': Hmm. If we can't get through the parade. We'll have to be in the parade.
:'''Men''': Huh? ''[grunting]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jewel''': ''[as they are pulling up a huge rock on a rope]'' Are you sure this is going to work?
:'''Blu''': Positive. Check out my math. ''[pointing to the map he's drawn on the ground]''
:'''Jewel''': Yeah, that's... that's comforting. Thank you. Look, let's just get this chain broken.
:'''Blu''': Right. Then we can go and find Linda.
:'''Jewel''': No, you can go find Linda. Once this chain is off, I'm going to go back to being free in the jungle. Deal?
:'''Blu''': Fine. Deal. ''[screams]''
:''[he puts one of his wings up accidentally, pulling the lever holding the rock off its hook]''
:'''Both''': ''[yelling]'' ''[groaning]''
:'''Jewel''': Nice try, brainiac. ''[groans]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]'' I think something is watching us.
:'''Toucan Children''': ''[chirping]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh, be careful, Blu. They might snuggle you to death.
:'''Blu''': Oh. ''[chuckles]'' Aw, come here. ''[screaming, groaning]''
:'''Toucan Children''': Intruders!
:'''Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[yelling and groaning]''
:'''Blu''': Now stop! Ow! Aah! ''[gulps, gags]'' Aah! No! No! Whoa! Whoa!
:'''Toucan Son''': Attack!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': Help!
:'''Rafael''': What's going on down there?
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[grunting and groaning]''
:'''Rafael''': Go, go, go. Off with you.
:'''Toucans Children''': Daddy! Daddy!
:'''Rafael''': Okay, guys, guys... I've told you thousand times. Manuela, Sofia, come on, now. Listen to me. Ow! Oh, yeah, right in the eye.
:'''Jewel''': ''[referring to Rafael's children]'' Oh, precious, aren't they?
:'''Rafael''': ''[chuckles]'' Kids? 17 of them, and one on the way. ''[shouting to two of his children shaking an unhatched egg]'' Hey!'' ''He is not a maraca! Stop shaking him! ''[turning to Blu and Jewel]''
:'''Toucan Children''': ''[giggling]''
:'''Rafael''': They're giving me gray feathers. Oh, this papa needs a break. So, you two lovebirds headed for Carnival?
:'''Jewel''': Whoa. ''[chuckles]'' Lovebirds?
:'''Blu''': Uh, we're more like acquaintance birds.
:'''Jewel''': And not even that. We're more like chained-to-each-other birds.
:'''Blu''': Yeah. I-I mean, if... Ow!
:'''Toucan Kid''': ''[giggles]''
:''[one of toucan kids pulls his feather]''
:'''Blu''': What is it with this kid and the feathers?
:'''Rafael''': We have no idea. We're having him tested.
:'''Jewel''': So, do you think you could help us get this thing off?
:'''Rafael''': Hmm. Lucky for you, you know Rafael, and Rafael knows everyone. Oh! Again with the eye. Okay, want me to call your mother?
:'''Toucan Children''': No!
:'''Rafael''': ''[chuckles]'' Works every time. They're scared to death of her. Ahh!
:'''Eva''': Call me for what?!
:'''Rafael''': Eva, my love. ''[chuckles]'' I must take this young couple to see Luiz.
:'''Eva''': Luiz? Huh. You don't fool me for a second! You and your amigo just want to sneak off to Carnival.
:'''Rafael''': Oh, Carnival. That magical time when I met the most beautiful bird in the world.
:''[He hugs Eva and blows an air kiss towards her]''
:'''Blu''': Aw.
:'''Jewel''': Ugh.
:'''Eva''': Huh!
:'''Rafael''': I still remember the song that was playing when I first laid eyes on you. ♪ Tall and tanned and young and lovely ♪ ♪ The girl from Ipanema ♪ ♪ Goes walking ♪ Come on, baby, sing it!
:'''Eva''': ''[off-key]'' ♪ And when she passes ♪
:'''Blu''': ''[shuddering]''
:'''Eva''': ''[off-key]'' ♪ Each one she passes goes, &quot;Ahh!&quot; ♪
:'''Rafael''': ''[as Eva sings out of tune]'' Like a river of the sweetest honey.
:''[Blu and Jewel wince as Eva sings]''
:'''Jewel''': Ooh! I guess love is deaf too.
:'''Rafael''': Come here. ''[chuckles as they bang each other]''
:'''Toucan kids''': Ew!
:'''Eva''': Okay. Take them to Luiz, but hurry back.
:'''Rafael''': You are an angel. I'll miss you, my juicy little mango.
:'''Eva''': Oh, me, too, my pudgy papaya.
:'''Boy''': Ow! Ow!
:'''Eva''': ''[hears baby toucans' blow]'' [[Arthur (TV series)|'''Hey! Marco! Carlos! Put your brother down!''' '''''NOW!''''']]
:'''Rafael''': I can't believe she actually let me go.
:'''Blu''': So, uh... how far is this Luiz?
:'''Rafael''': Not far. Thirty minutes as the crow flies.
:'''Blu''': Uh... and how long as the macaw walks?
:'''Jewel''': Bobo here can't fly.
:'''Rafael''': But... but he's a bird!
:'''Blu''': Not all birds fly. There are ostriches.
:'''Jewel''': You are not an ostrich.
:'''Blu''': Well, not technically, but...
:'''Rafael''': Wait, wait, wait! My friends, I wanna help, but to walk the whole way, it... it... it can't be done!
:''[He suddenly notices his kids clambering around his wife asking after him]''
:'''Rafael''': But hey, we might as well give it a shot. Let's go, quickly. No, no, d-don't look back. They sense fear.
:''[He turns Blu and Jewel around and walks away quietly; Jewel turns to look at the kids]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Monkey''': ''[shrieks, chitters]''
:'''Lady Tourist''': Oh, what an adorable monkey.
:'''Guy''': Aw.
:'''Mauro''': ''[indistinct chatter]''
:'''Monkey''': ''[chittering]'' ''[hooting]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[blows raspberries]''
:'''Woman''': Oh. Oh, no.
:'''Man Tourist''': Hey! My watch.
:''[&quot;Funky Monkey&quot; plays]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[grunting]'' ''[hooting]''
:'''Nigel''': Hello, boys. Seems like you've had a busy day.
:'''Mauro''': ''[laughs]'' What, this? ''[Referring to all the stuff they've stolen from tourists]'' This is just some stuff we found. Right, boys? Yeah.
:''[The crowd of monkeys all agree]''
:'''Nigel''': I'm not interested in your nicked knick-knacks. Your burgled baubles bore me. There are two blue macaws out there, and I need your multitude of eyes to help me find them.
:'''Mauro''': Oh, yeah? What's in it for us? ''[chuckles]''
:'''Nigel''': Well, that's a fair question.
:''[He suddenly takes the lead marmoset and flies high into the sky]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Nigel''': Let's discuss it.
:''[Nigel drops him]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[screaming]'' ''[frantic hooting]''
:'''Nigel''': I certainly see your point.
:''[To the lead marmoset as he's falling down]''
:'''Nigel''': But what could I possibly do for you in return? Hmm?
:'''Mauro''': ''[while falling]'' '''Save me! SAVE ME!'''
:'''Nigel''': Oh! Well, that's a thought, yeah. But is it enough? I don't want to feel like I'm cheating you.
:'''Mauro''': Ahh! Help me! Help me! Help me! We'll do it! We'll do it! Save me, please. Save me!
:''[Just before he hits the ground, he stops as Nigel catches him]''
:'''Nigel''': All right, you've twisted my wing. Deal. Now then, anymore questions?
:''[The group of monkeys remain silent]''
:'''Nigel''': No? Good. You will spread out and you will find these macaws by the end of the day, or it's flying lessons for everyone! Go!
:''[The group of monkeys all scream with fright and run off]''
:'''Nigel''': Go do your monkey business.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blu''': ''[whimpers]'' ''[yells]'' ''[as he looks down the edge of a cliff]'' I've changed my mind. Yeah. Uh, maybe we could find a... a bus schedule or something?
:'''Rafael''': Come on. You're not gonna back out now, Not in front of the lady.
:'''Blu''': Uh... huh! Okay, yeah. Yeah, yeah, sure.
:'''Rafael''': All right, that's the spirit.
:'''Jewel''': You're sure you're up for this?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Yeah, I mean, well it's not like we're just hurling ourselves off a mountain or something, right?
:'''Rafael''': Actually, that was pretty much my entire plan.
:'''Blu''': What?
:'''Rafael''': No. Don't worry, Blu. It's in your DNA. And if our featherless friends can do it, how hard can it be?
:''[Two men on a hang-glider have an unsuccessful take-off]''
:'''Man on Glider''': No, no, wait, wait! Aah! Mommy!
:'''Rafael''': Fun, right?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Fun.
:'''Rafael''': Okay. I need you two to get closer. ''[Blu and Jewel step an inch close]'' Closer. ''[Blu and Jewel step another inch close and touch each other]'' Closer. Ooh. Nice. Now put your wings around each other.
:'''Blu''': What?
:'''Rafael''': Come on, amigo! It's not like she's going to bite. Will you?
:'''Jewel''': We'll see.
:'''Rafael''': ''[to Blu and Jewel who are standing side by side]'' Now, you flap your right wing, you flap your left wing, and together, you fly.
:'''Blu''': Uh... but this doesn't seem aerodynamically possible!
:'''Rafael''': Ey-ya-ya-ya-ya! You think too much! Fly! It's not what you think up here. ''[points to Blu's head]'' It's what you feel in here. ''[points to Blu's heart]'' And when you feel the rhythm of your heart, it's like Samba! You fly! ''[whooping]'' ''[as Rafael is demonstrating flying to Blu]'' See? It's easy.
:'''Blu''': Easy? Easy for you to say. 'Cause from... from here it looks really, really hard!
:'''Jewel''': Hey, if you want to see Linda again, this is the only way.
:'''Blu''': Okay, you're right.
:'''Jewel''': Yes, I am.
:'''Blu''': This is for Linda.
:'''Jewel''': Right!
:'''Blu''': Keep it simple.
:'''Jewel''': Easy-breezy.
:'''Blu''': Thrust, lift, drag.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, come on! Let's go!
:''[She drags him along]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa, whoa, wait!
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside. Inside, outside.
:'''Blu''': Inside, outside. Inside, outside.
:'''Jewel''': Inside, outside.
:'''Blu''': Inside...
:'''Jewel''': Come on, Blu! You can do it!
:'''Blu''': I can do it. I can do it. I can do it. I can't do it! ''[yells]''
:'''Jewel''': Whoa! Not again!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': ''[sighs]'' Am I dead?
:'''Jewel''': No. We're still alive! ''[laughs]''
:'''Blu''': ''[sighing]'' This is incredible. Wow. This is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
:'''Jewel''': ''[laughs]'' See what you've been missing?
:'''Blu''': Yeah. Whoa!
:'''Rafael''': ''[after Blu and Jewel have landed on top of a hand glider's wings]'' All right, Blu! You're flying! Sort of. Not really. But do you feel it?
:'''Blu''': Yes! I do feel it.
:''[Blu stands up confidently and spreads his wings about to/ready to fly for real]''
:'''Jewel''': No! No! Blu, wait!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:''[Both holler as they get windswept off the hang-glider]''
:'''Rafael''': Ay, caramba.
:''[Blu accidentally punches a hole in an orange and pink hang-glider; male human screams when he sees Blu]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Aah! ''[grunting]''
:'''Blu''': Whoa, whoa! Aah!
:'''Other Hang Glider''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Blu''': Aah! Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': We're going to die! ''[whimpers]'' Whoa!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Other Hang Glider''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Both''': Aah! ''[grunting]''
:'''Rafael''': ''[after Blu and Jewel have crash landed to the ground from Blu's nearly successful but failed attempt at flying]'' You did not feel it in here. ''[pointing to his heart]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[sarcastically]'' You think?
:'''Rafael''': Let's catch a ride to Luiz. Hurry, you two! Vamos! Vamos!
:'''Blu''': Ah, okay. Ahh! Last of the species here. Whoa!
:'''Jewel''': Move it! ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': Hey, wait... wait-wait... wait up.
:'''Rafael''': Come on, lovebirds.
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Rafael''': Ah, you made it.
:'''Jewel''': ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': I would love to go five minutes without almost getting killed. Is that too much to ask?
:'''Jewel''': For a bird who can't fly? Oh, yeah.
:'''Officer''': ''[blows whistle]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tulio''': They're starting to close off the streets for Carnival. You better be right, kid, because we're running out of time. ''[groans]'' I'll never be able to get my car through this crowd.
:'''Fernando''': Don't worry, I'm on it.
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[yelling]''
:'''Chickens''': ''[clucking]''
:'''Tulio''': Hey, kid! How'd you get this bike?
:'''Fernando''': I traded it for your Jeep.
:'''Tulio''': What?!
:'''Fernando''': Yeah, it's in great condition.
:'''Tulio''': Whoa!
:'''Fernando''': Well, good condition!
:'''Linda and Tulio''': Aah!
:'''Fernando''': Hey, out of the way!
:'''Linda''': Look out!
:'''Tulio''': Ow! ''[screams]''
:'''Fernando''': Hold on!
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[shuttered grunting]'' ''[screaming]''
:'''Blu''': Ahh!
:'''Jewel''': Whoa!
:'''Blu''': ''[groans]'' Ow!
:'''Jewel''': Ugh. I'm going to chew through my own leg if this doesn't come off soon.
:'''Rafael''': Relax. If I know Luiz, we're right where we wanna be.
:'''Nico''': Hey, Rafi! If it isn't the king of carnival!
:'''Rafael''': Nico! Pedro! What up, family?
:'''Pedro''': Where you been hidin' yourself, bird?
:'''Nico''': Man, I thought you were dead.
:'''Pedro''': Hold up! Rewind. ''[going towards Blu]'' Ain't that the bird from the cage?
:'''Nico''': I think our love lessons went down smooth.
:'''Pedro''': You work fast!
:'''Nico''': Baby got big!
:'''Pedro''': You was locked up and now you're rollin' up with a hot wing! Woo! I wanna be like you.
:'''Blu''': Oh, no, no. It's not what you think. We're just uh... chained together.
:'''Nico''': Hey, I'm not judging you.
:'''Pedro''': Keep it spicy.
:'''Nico''': Oh, yeah.
:'''Rafael''': Hey, guys. We're looking for Luiz. Have you seen him?
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, I seen him, but you didn't, 'cause you just missed him. He took the trolley back to the garage.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, great.
:'''Nico''': Relax, baby bird. You could catch the next one.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, it's time to take it to the next level.
:'''Blu''': What's wrong with this level?
:'''Pedro''': Come on. This ain't the level. The next level's the level. You got to shake your tail feathers.
:'''Nico''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Blu''': Uh, we... we got to get this chain off first.
:'''Rafael''': Come on, lovebirds. You're in Rio. You should enjoy it!
:'''Nico''': Yeah, live a little.
:'''Mauro''': Ah. Ooh. Hmm? ''[laughs]'' We got 'em.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[dance music playing, festive yelling]''
:'''Birds''': ''[laughter]''
:'''Kipo''': Hey!
:'''Nico''': Welcome to paradise!
:'''Rafael''': Some party, huh?
:'''Blu''': ''[as they enter a club full of birds dancing and thumping with music]'' This is the coolest place I've ever seen. Despite all the obvious health code violations.
:'''Rafael''': ''[laughs]'' I like you! Nothing you say makes any sense.
:'''Nico''': E ai, galera? All right, everyone, listen up. Rafi has some special guests from out of town, and let's show them some love, because I don't think they get out much.
:'''Pedro''': Ya, ya, ya, ya, yo! Everybody put their wings together and clap 'em as loud as you can! Flap 'em, clap 'em. I don't care, slap 'em. ''[squwaking]''
:'''Nico''': Party in the Ipanema, baby.
:''[&quot;Hot Wings (I Wanna Party)&quot; plays]''
:'''Jewel''': What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': Uh, I don't know.
:'''Rafael''': All right, Blu! Hey, she likes you.
:'''Blu''': What are you talking about? Haven't you been listening?
:'''Rafael''': No, but I've been watching. Just be yourself. Go on.
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''♪ Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! ♪''
:'''Monkeys''': ''[chittering and hooting]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[from trailer]'' You two are coming with me.
:'''Jewel''': In your little monkey dreams. ''[spits on the ground]''
:'''Blu''': Yeah. ''[tries to spit too, but it sticks to his beak. He wipes it off.]'' That was meant for you.
:'''Rafael''': Come on. Can we all just get along?
:'''Mauro''': This isn't your fight, big nose. ''[laughs, gasps]''
:''[The marmosets laugh, until one bird grabs Mauro's arm and glares at him.]''
:'''Kipo''': You mess with my friends, you mess with me.
:'''Other Birds''': And us!
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, little [[King Kong]].
:''[The marmosets and birds have an intense stare-off]''
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[panicky]'' I don't know what's going on here. ''[flies off]''
:'''Pedro''': ''[breaking a stare-off]'' '''&lt;big&gt;BIRDS VS. [[w:Common marmoset|MONKEYS]]!&lt;/big&gt;'''
:''[The birds charge in.]''
:'''Mauro''': Get them!
:''[The marmosets charge in.]''
:'''All''': ''[shouting, grunting]''
:'''Monkey''': ''[laughs, grunts]''
:'''Pedro''': Yippee-kai-yay, monkey man!
:'''Nico''': Yeah!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[asps]''
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Jewel''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Mauro''': Ohh!
:'''Monkey''': Yee-haw! Yee-haw! Giddyap!
:'''Rafael''': ''[grunting]'' Missed!
:'''Monkey''': ''[hooting, whooping]''
:'''Jewel''': We got to go! ''[gasps]''
:'''Kipo''': Need a lift?
:'''Blu''': Whoa!
:'''Nico''': ''[gasps]'' ''[whooping]'' ''[as he hits one of the monkey's with his bottle top hat]'' ''[laughs]'' Ooh! Take that, you funky monkey!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[laughing, whooping]''
:'''Blu''': ''[chuckles]'' Thank you!
:'''Kipo''': Anytime! Whoo-hoo!
:'''Pedro''': That's what I'm talking about!
:'''Blu''': ''[as they've gotten away from the monkeys]'' Man, we threw down!
:'''Jewel''': Yeah, we threw down!
:'''Rafael''': You guys were like fire and ice.
:'''Nico''': Thunder and lightnin'!
:'''Pedro''': Hip 'n' hop!
:'''Blu''': Cheese and sprinkles!
:''[they all stop laughing and give Blu a strange look]''
:'''Blu''': It's a Minnesota thing.
:''[they all laugh]''
:'''Rafael''': You see? Nothing you say makes any sense.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fernando''': Come on. Follow me.
:'''Tulio''': Uh... ''[groans]''
:'''Fernando''': What? But... the birds were here.
:'''Tulio''': Yeah, sure they were, kid.
:'''Fernando''': I swear! The birds were right here.
:'''Linda''': Well, how do you know?
:'''Fernando''': Because I'm-- I'm the one who took them.
:'''Linda''': You?!
:'''Fernando''': I-I... I didn't mean to hurt anybody... I needed the money.
:'''Linda''': But Fernando, I trusted you!
:'''Fernando''': I know, but-- ''[Before he can finish Tipa and Armando enter]''
:'''Linda''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, man, that's good.
:'''Fernando''': Hey, guys.
:'''Armando''': What are you doing here?
:'''Fernando''': I just wanted to see if... you had any work for me.
:'''Tipa''': Well, if you were here two hours ago, and you've could've helped us load the... Ow! What?
:'''Armando''': ''[quietly]'' Shut up.
:'''Fernando''': So, wh-why are you guys dressed for Carnival?
:'''Tipa''': So no one will notice us when we smuggle these b... Ow!
:'''Armando''': Shut up!
:'''Tipa''': ''[quietly]'' We made a float.
:'''Fernando''': Oh. Oh, a-a float. So, you guys are going to the parade. Can I come? I'm a great dancer.
:'''Tipa''': Can he come? Come on, please? Three's better than two?
:'''Fernando''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Armando''': ''[groans]'' Oh, fine. We got to hurry, though.
:'''Fernando''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Tipa''': Whoa. I almost forget. I thought it was right here. ''[grunting]'' Ah, there it is. Huh. Got it. ''[chuckles]'' Let's go.
:'''Fernando''': Whew!
:'''Armando''': Hurry up, kid.
:'''Tipa''': Can he ride on the plane with us, too? Ow!
:'''Armando''': Shut up!
:'''Tulio''': No. We can't let them get on that plane.
:'''Linda''': You can drive a motorcycle, right?
:'''Tulio''': Yes. You insult me. Hmm!
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Guy''': ''[yells]''
:'''Linda''': Ooh...
:'''Tulio''': Ow... No, I can't... drive a motorcycle. ''[distorted yelling]''
:'''Linda''': Whoa! It's just like riding a snowmobile! ''[chuckles]''
:'''Tulio''': ''[yells]''
:'''Nigel''': What happened?
:'''Lead Marmoset''': ''[whimpers]'' Papa?
:'''Nigel''': What happened?!
:'''Mauro''': ''[woozy groan]''
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[cheeping quietly]''
:'''Nigel''': Ha!
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[squeaky]'' Oh, no, let me go!
:'''Nigel''': ''[grabs hold of a tiny green bird]'' Stop your chirping and talk to me!
:'''Little Green Bird''': No! No! No! I don't know anything! Help!
:'''Nigel''': Mmm... when I bite down on your head, will it go pop? Or will it go crack? ''[he squeezes hard on the little green birds head]'' Where are the cerulean birds? That means blue, by the way.
:'''Little Green Bird''': ''[gasps]'' They escaped! Went to Luiz.
:'''Nigel''': Anything else?
:'''Little Green bird''':(Smiles) They said you were very nice.
:'''Nigel''': Hmm, did they? Well, liar.
:'''Little Green bird''': And handsome too?
:''[Nigel throws the little green bird and it hits the lead marmoset in the head]''
:'''Nigel''': Never send a monkey to do a bird's job. ''[squawks]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rafael''': Pssst!
:'''Blu''': ''[whispers]'' Don't worry, I got it.
:'''Rafael''': ''[as he watches Blu getting closer to Jewel]'' There he goes! That's my boy!
:''[Blu tries to wrap his wing around Jewel but stops mid-way as Jewel looks at him]''
:'''Blu''': Ooh! Is it hot? I... I think I'm... I'm sweating. I didn't even think that was biologically possible. I get... look? ''[he holds up his wing]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh. Wow.
:'''Nico''': ''[as they watch Blu make a fool of himself]'' Yeah! That's your boy, alright.
:'''Rafael''': Okay, so he needs a little help. Well, come on. Let's give him some. Set the mood.
:'''Pedro''': Alright, look. I'm on it. I know how to set the mood. Check it out. ''[he starts dancing and rapping]'' Get it-get it-get it-get it-get it-get it girl! Get-ge-get-ge-get it girl! Take her, take her to the flow! Show her, show her how you roll! Drop it! Drop it! Drop it low! Drop it, d-drop it low!
:'''Rafael''': Whoa, whoa, whoa! What kind of mood is that?
:'''Nico''': Pedro, Pedro, a little too aggressive. Not hatin' on your creativity, but I think I got this one. Follow my lead. ''[whistling melody]''
:'''Rafael''': Now, that's more like it.
:'''Nico''': ''[whistling romantic melody over bossa nova rhythm]'' ''[singing]'' Wasn't really thinking, wasn't looking, wasn't searching for an answer / In the moonlight / When I saw your face / Saw you looking at me, saw you peeking out from under moon beams / Through the palm trees / Swaying in the breeze / I know I'm feeling so much more than ever before / And so I'm giving more to you than I thought I could do / Don't know how it happened, don't know why but you don't really need a reason / When the stars shine / Just to fall in love / Made to love each other, made to be together for a life time / In the sunshine / Flying in the sky / I know I'm feeling so much more than ever before / And so I'm giving more to you / Than I thought I could do / Oh yeah... / Now I know love is real / So it's sky high, as the angels try / Letting you and I / Fly love
:'''Jewel''': Wow. What a beautiful sunset.
:'''Blu''': Yeah.
:'''Rafael''': ''[flying alongside the trolley, whispering to Blu]'' Pssst! Blu, down here. Just tell her, &quot;You have beautiful eyes&quot;.
:'''Blu''': That's good! Great idea. ''[to Jewel; confidently]'' I have beautiful eyes.
:'''Jewel''': Aah... yeah. Okay, Sure. They're... they're nice.
:'''Rafael''': ''[flying low, whispers to Blu]'' No! Her eyes! Her eyes!
:'''Blu''': Oh, right. Yeah! ''[turns to Jewel]'' Your eyes. Your eyes are great. Not mine. I mean, you know, mine are okay. But yours, I-I bet you can see right through them.
:'''Rafael''': ''[whispering to Blu]'' Blu, just tell her how you feel.
:'''Blu''': ''[turns to Jewel]'' Jewel?
:'''Jewel''': Yeah?
:'''Blu''': I've been wanting to tell you, that I... that I... ''[suddenly swallows a floating flower petal and chokes]''
:'''Jewel''': Oh, how sweet. You're getting choked up. ''[turns to look at Blu and realizes he's really choking]'' Oh! Oh! You're choking! Uh, okay! All right! ''[she starts giving him the heimlich maneuver]'' Come on, Blu, you got to move with me. Stay with me, Blu. Hyah! One more. Come on. One... more... time! Hyah!
:'''Rafael''': ''[they watch in dismay as Jewel gives Blu the Heimlich maneuver]'' Yep, that's my boy.
:'''Nico''': ''[descending whistle then imitates explosion]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after Blu spits out the flower petal and they get off the trolley]''
:'''Rafael''': Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Luiz's garage!
:'''Blu''': After you.
:'''Jewel''': No, no, no, you first.
:'''Blu''': Oh, please, I insist.
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Okay. ''[thump]'' ''[chuckling]''
:'''Jewel''': Yeah. ''[chuckles]'' ''[sighs]'' Guess this is it.
:'''Blu''': Uh, yeah. Quite an adventure.
:'''Jewel''': End of the line.
:'''Blu''': Ah, yes.
:'''Jewel''': Guess things like this don't happen in Tiny-soda.
:'''Blu''': Tiny-soda? ''[laughs]'' Oh. Wait, Minne-sota?
:'''Jewel''': Yeah. ''[laughs]''
:'''Blu''': Oh, that's very good.
:'''Jewel''': Right.
:'''Blu''': That's very funny, actually.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rafael''': Luiz! Are you here? Luiz? Hey, buddy. I got some friends I want you to meet.
:'''Luiz''': ''[vicious barking]''
:'''Pedro and Nico''': Aah!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': Aah! Inside! Outside! Inside Outside! ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': ''[whimpering]'' ''[disgusted groan]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[laughing]'' I got you's good!
:'''Jewel and Blu''': What?
:'''Luiz''': I could've ripped your throats out, but I didn't. ''[slurps]'' But I could've.
:'''Rafael''': ''[laughs]'' Hey, Luiz! Stop scaring my friends.
:'''Luiz''': Hey, Rafie! Come here! Where you been?
:'''Rafael''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Luiz''': You look good.
:'''Jewel''': W-W-Wait. Luiz is a [[w:Bulldog|bulldog]]?
:'''Luiz''': You got something against dogs?
:'''Jewel''': I do when they're drooling on me.
:'''Luiz''': ''[slurps]'' It's a medical condition.
:'''Rafael''': No, no, hey, amigo, we really need you.
:'''Luiz''': She's mean, bro.
:'''Rafael''': Luiz, come on, please, please. We need your help.
:'''Luiz''': Hmm. ''[slurps]'' I think I know what to do.
:'''Blu''': Uh, are you sure this is safe?
:'''Luiz''': Oh, sure. There's nothing to it. ''[muffled, echoing]'' Now if something goes wrong, scream really loud. Because I hear too good with this thing on. Hey, Raffie! Get the switch, please.
:'''Rafael''': Don't worry. He's a professional. ''[grunts]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Nico''': ''[whimpering]''
:'''Luiz''': Now, try not to move! I can't really see out of this thing, either!
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Blu''': ''[gasping]'' ''[deep, distorted yelling]'' ''[distorted yelling continues]'' Whoa!
:'''Rafael''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Luiz''': Hey! Where'd you go?
:'''Blu''': Whoa...!
:'''Jewel''': ''[gasps]''
:'''All''': ''[strained grunting]''
:''[As he swipes Luiz's drool off his foot]''
:'''Blu and Jewel''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[grunting, spits]''
:'''Blu''': ''[as he swipes Luiz's drool off his foot]'' Ugh! Ew, gross. ''[gasps]'' But I'm free. ''[realizing he's freed from his chain]'' Jewel! Jewel, we're free! Slimy, but free. Contaminated, probably. But free! You believe it's finally...
:''[Jewel suddenly flies past him, laughing with joy]''
:'''Jewel''': Ha-ha! ''[whooping]''
:'''Blu''': ...over.
:'''Jewel''': Oh, yeah! Whoo! Wah-hah! Come on, guys, let's go!
:'''Nico''': What are we standing around for? It's Carnival!
:'''Pedro''': ''[whooping]''
:'''Nico, Pedro and Rafael''': ''[whooping, shouting happily]''
:'''All''': ''[whooping, laughing]''
:'''Rafael''': Beautiful!
:'''Pedro''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Jewel''': ''[shouts happily]''
:''[As Blu sadly watches Jewel, Nico, Pedro and Rafael fly around in the sky with joy]''
:'''Luiz''': Yep. I know just how you feel. Watchin' 'em up there, makes you want to chase them and grab 'em in your mouth and bite their heads off. Huh? ''[slurps]'' ''[Blu remains silent]'' Hey, I'm just kiddin', bro. Yeah. Chasin' 'em is plenty.
:'''Jewel''': ''[laughing]'' ♪ I'm flying flying just like a bird! ♪
:'''Nico''': Jewel, but you are a bird.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[As she is happily flying, Jewel notices Blu walking away sadly]''
:'''Jewel''': Hey, where you going? ''[Blu ignores her and keeps on walking]'' Blu? ''[Blu stops walking]'' Blu, what's wrong?
:'''Blu''': Nothing. Everything's perfect. You'll be off to the rain forest. I'll be back with Linda. Just like we planned.
:'''Jewel''': I...
:''[Nico and Pedro fly down towards them]''
:'''Nico''': Hey, birds! Stop yappin' and start flappin'! Let's go!
:'''Jewel''': I...I...I guess I thought maybe...
:'''Blu''': What? That you...you'd come to Minnesota? ''[Jewel just looks at him]'' Great, I guess I... I'll knit you a scarf.
:'''Jewel''': No, that's not what I meant.
:'''Blu''': Look Jewel, I can't spend my life walking around following you wherever you're going.
:'''Jewel''': Hey, it's not my fault you don't fly.
:'''Pedro:''' ''[to Nico as they watch Blu and Jewel argue]'' Awkward.
:'''Rafael:''' ''[to Blu and Jewel]'' ''[as he notices Blu and Jewel starting to argue]'' Okay, okay. You know what? It's just good. Just clear the air. Just be completely honest with each other.
:'''Blu''': You want honesty? ''[to Rafael and Jewel]'' Fine, fine, I can be honest. I don't belong here. In fact, I never wanted to even come here in the first place. ''[stammers]'' And... and... and you know what? I hate samba.
:''[Jewel and Rafael gasps and Nico starts crying into Pedro's wing]''
:'''Pedro''': Hey! That's a little too far.
:'''Nico''': Make the mean bird take it back.
:'''Blu''': Yeah, I said it. Every song sounds exactly the same. ''[sings]'' Tico, taco ya-ya-ya. Tico, taco ya-ya-ya! ''[groans]'' I'm tico-taco out of here.
:'''Jewel''': ''[angrily]'' Fine! See you around, pet! ''[starts flying away from Blu]''
:'''Rafael''': No, no. Wait, wait, wait. Come back! You belong together. You are Juliet to his Romeo! Sure, they both die at the end. But, you get my point! Oh, young love. Always so melodramatic. ''[to Nico and Pedro]'' All right, boys. Go after her. ''[starts heading over to Blu]'' Blu! Come back here, come on!
:'''Luiz''': Yeah! I'm ready for Carnival! Who wants to ride in my... fruit? You left without me. That's messed up. ''[slurps]''
:'''Pedro''': ''[panting]'' Jewel! Jewel!
:'''Nico''': Wait up!
:'''Jewel''': ''[trembling exhale]'' ''[sniffles]'' ''[sighs]'' ''[gasps]''
:''[Nigel catches Jewel as she's flying]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[catches Jewel as she is flying]'' Going somewhere, pretty bird?
:'''Jewel''': Oh, yeah. I was just on my way to claw your eyes out! ''[punches Nigel in the face; Nico and Pedro see Nigel get a hold of Jewel]''
:'''Nigel''': Temper. Temper. Now come along, my dear. We're going to a parade. And everybody loves a parade! ''[flies away with Jewel]''
:'''Jewel''': Let go of me!
:'''Pedro''': ''[as he, along with Nico, watch Nigel take Jewel by force]'' ''[as they watch Nigel take Jewel by force]'' Hey! Get back here! Ain't nobody mess with a friend of Pedro. I ain't havin' it! It's on! ''[starts punching the air]''
:'''Nico''': What are you-- on?! Did you see the talons on that guy?
:'''Pedro''': &quot;Talons? Maybe, it's on next time.''[he and Nico turn and fly away]'' '''RALFIEEEE!'''
:'''Nico''': Blu! Help!
:'''Pedro''': Help!
:''[Cut on Blu walking home, with Rafael following him]''
:'''Blu:''' Rafael, quit following me. You're going in the wrong direction. Isn't Carnaval that way?
:'''Rafael:''' I'm not going to Carnaval. No, I'm going home.
:'''Blu:''' But I thought you loved Carnaval.
:'''Rafael:''' I do. But I love my family much more. And that's a choice I made with this. ''[points to Blu's heart]'' Not with this. ''[points to Blu's head (or brain) meanwhile, Nico and Pedro approach Blu and Rafael]''
:'''Nico and Pedro''': Blu! Blu! Hey, Blu! Blu!
:'''Pedro''': I was flying, and then I saw this big cockatoo!
:'''Nico''': With big ninja taloons!
:'''Pedro''': This cockatoo was ugly.
:'''Nico''': Yeah...
:'''Pedro''': Anyways, that's not the point.
:'''Nico''': And then Jewel was there, and he snatched Jewel up, like, he snatched her up! And then he was, like &quot;You're comin' with me, you little princess?&quot;
:'''Pedro''': And Jewel was, like... ''[imitating kicks and punches]'' &quot;I ain't your princess, Leave me alone.&quot; And I was, like, &quot;What?&quot;
:'''Nico''': Then he was, like, &quot;What?&quot;
:'''Blu''': Stop! Just tell me what happened.
:'''Pedro''': He got Jewel, man!
:'''Both''': And he's taking her to the parade.
:'''Blu''': ''[gasp]'' This is all my fault. Let's fly.
:''[Blu rides on Luiz]''
:'''Luiz''': Carnaval, here we come!
:'''Nico:''' ''[grunts, chuckles]'' Hey, dog, I'm drowning back here!
:'''Luiz:''' You will get wet on this ride! Ha-ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marcel''': Come on, come on, come on. Where are these guys? ''[laughs]''Yes! Nice! Very nice.
:'''Tipa''': ''[calls]'' Marcel! Yoo-hoo! Marcel! ''[clucking like a chicken]''
:'''Marcel''': Oh, boy.
:'''Tipa''': We're a chicken! Cluck, cluck! ''[chuckling, laughing]''(He dresses up as egg) Come on, Fernando, dance! ''[clucking]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[groans]'' Oh, idiots.
:'''Linda''': Excuse me. Um... ''[clears throat]'' Coming through. Watch your feet.
:'''Guy''': Hey!
:'''Linda''': Whoops. Sorry.
:'''Gate Guard''': Go ahead. Come in. Wait. Stop, please. Performers only.
:'''Tulio''': Huh? ''[gasps softy]'' ''[chuckles quietly]'' Wow! ''[dressed in a macaw costume; looks in a mirror and makes bird noises]'' Cyanopsitta Spixi. ''[squawking]'' Oh! Oh! ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Tulio!
:'''Tulio''': Oh! ''[nervous chuckle]'' Linda. I was just, uh...
:''[&quot;Say You, Say Me&quot; plays]''
:'''Linda''': I look ridiculous, don't I?
:'''Tulio and Linda''': Ooh!
:'''Tulio''': ''[groaning]''
:'''Linda''': ''[chuckles]'' Sorry.
:'''Tulio''': ''[giggles]'' Oh! The parade, it's about to start.
:'''Gate Guard''': Okay. Boa noite. Go ahead.
:'''Tulio''': ''[whispers]'' Okay, just follow my lead. Act naturally. ''[squawking]''
:'''Linda''': Oh, uh...
:'''Linda and Tulio''': ''[squawking]'' ''[squawking continues]''
:'''Linda''': Ooh...!
:'''Tulio''': Are you okay?
:'''Linda''': Yeah.
:'''Tulio''': Come on. Blu?
:'''Linda''': Blu?
:'''Tulio''': ''[squawks]''
:'''Linda''': Blu? Blu?
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[speaking Portuguese]''
:'''Linda''': What? W-Wait, wait, no, no, no. I am looking for a blue bird. B-Birdo?
:'''Samba School Director''': Que e que e &quot;birdo&quot;?
:'''Linda''': Birdo, yes.
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[continues in Portuguese]''
:'''Linda''': Oh. Okay. Wait! What are you doing? Tulio! Hey! Let me out!
:'''Tulio''': ''[squawking]'' ''[coughing]'' Whoa, whoa!
:'''Linda''': Tulio! ''[gasps]'' Oh... this is not good. This is not good. This is... Cheese and sprinkles.
:'''Crowd''': ''[singing samba song, percussion booming]''
:'''Linda''': Okay, you can bring me down now! I think we're done here!
:'''Tipa''': ''[In rhythm]'' Hey! Hey! ''[grunting in rhythm]''
:'''Crowd''': Boo! ''[shouting]''
:'''Tipa''': Ha-ha! I think they like my moves! Ha-ha! Hey. Keep dancing egg-boy!
:'''Nigel''': One down, and one to go.
:'''Jewel''': You'll never find him. He's already gone.
:'''Nigel''': Oh, I don't need to find him. He'll find you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Luiz''': Ha-ha! This is the spit! ''[as they arrive at carnival to find Jewel]'' Yeah, baby! Now I can get my freak on!
:'''Blu''': Luiz, please! Rescue first, freak later. ''[gasps]'' Come on!
:'''Luiz''': Out of my way, people!
:'''Guy''': Whoa, whoa, whoa!
:'''Man''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Rafael''': All right, guys, I'll fly ahead and look for Jewel. Hello, ladies.
:'''Pedro''': Mr. Big Nose! Hold up!
:'''Linda''': Uh...
:'''Samba School Director''': Rebola, rebola, rebola!
:'''Linda''': What?
:'''Women''': Rebola!
:'''Tulio''': Linda! Excuse me. Excuse me. Linda! ''[gasps]'' Linda! ''[speaking Portuguese]''
:'''Samba School Director''': Rebola!
:'''Linda''': In English!
:'''Tulio''': Linda, Linda! You've got to shake your tushy!
:'''Linda''': No! We don't shake our tushies in Minnesota!
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[groans]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[barking]''
:'''Women''': ''[yelling]''
:'''Luiz''': Hot dog! Coming through!
:'''Linda''': ''[grunts]'' ''[gasps]'' Blu!
:'''Luiz''': ''[barking]''
:'''Linda''': Tulio! Tulio! I saw Blu!
:'''Tulio''': What?
:'''Samba School Director''': Rebola! Rebola!
:'''Linda''': Hold on, Blu! I'm coming for you!
:'''Tulio''': ''[gasps]'' Meu Deus! ''[My Gosh!]''
:'''Linda''': Whoa! Oh! Oh! Blu! Blu!
:'''Blu''': Linda! Linda? Wait!
:'''All''': ''[gasping]''
:'''Rafael''': ''[Blu and Linda have just noticed each other at the carnival]'' Blu! Blu! We found her!
:'''Pedro''': She's on some, like, weird [[w:chicken|chicken]] float.
:'''Rafael''': Come on!
:'''Blu''': Let's go get Jewel.
:'''Linda''': Wait! Blu! Where are you going?
:'''Man''': Ow!
:'''Men''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Linda''': Whoo!
:'''Man''': Aha!
:'''Linda''': ''[laughs]'' Ahh!
:'''Crowd''': ''[cheering]''
:'''Samba School Director''': ''[shouts in Portuguese]''
:'''Linda''': I saw Blu! He's riding on a bulldog!
:'''Tulio''': What?!
:'''Luiz''': ''[barking]'' ''[panting]''
:'''Blu''': There they are, that's the float!
:'''Luiz''': Whoo! That float is a crime in itself! Oh!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Man''': ''[shouting in Portuguese]''
:'''Luiz''': ''[snarling]''
:'''Linda''': There he is!
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]'' ''[in the smugglers' float]'' ''[quietly]'' Hey, Jewel?
:'''Jewel''': Blu!
:'''Blu''': I'm gonna let you out of here.
:'''Jewel''': No, no. You can't be here. You have to go. Nigel is...
:''[Suddenly Nigel attacks Blu and throws him in a cage]''
:'''Nigel:''' Hello, pretty bird. So kind of you to join our little soiree.
:'''Blu:''' Oh, come on. You really think I came alone? I got three of the roughest, meanest, craziest birds in all of Rio right behind me.
:'''Pedro:''' Woo-hoo! You hear that, guys?
:''[Blu sees that Nigel has replaced Rafael, Nico, &amp; Pedro in a cage nearby]''
:'''Pedro:''' We're saved! That's right! That's right. That's right.
:'''Nico:''' Uh... I think he means us.
:'''Pedro:''' Oh.
:'''Nigel:''' ''[sighs]'' Ah, love. It's such a powerful and stupid thing.
:'''Marcel:''' ''[Chuckles]'' Yes! Well done Nigel.
:'''Women''': ''[gasps]''
:'''Linda''': Oh! Oh! Out of the way! Sorry. Wait! Wait!
:'''Tipa''': Whoo-hoo! We actually made it! Hey, Marcel! Can we do this again next year? Please? Please? Could I drive next year, too?
:'''Linda''': Wait! Come back! ''[panting]'' Get in!
:'''Luiz''': ''[on top of a carnival float]'' I don't know how I got up here, but I ain't never comin' down! Ah-ah! Woo-hoo! ''[starts dancing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tipa''': ''[to a guilty Fernando as he gives the cage with Rafael, Pedro and Nico in it to him]'' Come on, kid.
:'''Fernando''': ''[to Blu and Jewel]'' I'm gonna get you guys out of here. ''[gasps when Nigel comes down and screeches at him]''
:'''Marcel''': What do you think you're doing?
:'''Fernando''': Uh, nothing.
:'''Marcel''': You shouldn't have done that. ''[Fernando looks sadly back at Jewel as Marcel drags him away, then bites him on the hand to escape]'' Now, come on. ''[grunts]'' Ow! ''[groans]''
:'''Fernando''': ''[panting]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[to Armando]'' Just forget him. Get the birds!
:'''Tulio''': They're getting away.
:'''Linda''': We'll see about that.
:''[The parade float crashes thru the barb wired gates]''
:'''Tulio''': Ahh! Watch out!
:'''Marcel''': We did it, boys!
:'''Armando''': Yes!
:'''Tipa''': Yes, we did it! Ha, ha! We're the best! Ha, ha.
:'''Marcel''': ''[spots the scarlet macaw parade float in front of them]'' Is that, a float?
:'''Tipa''': Wow! Look at the detail on that thing.
:'''Armando''': Ooh!
:'''Marcel''': ''[to Tipa]'' Pull up, you idiot! Pull up!
:''[The plane pulls up as they all scream in which the Plane damages the sun part of the scarlet macaw parade float]''
:'''All''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Tulio''': ''[screams]''
:'''Linda ''[sobbing]''''': Blu! Blu! Oh, Blu. ''[sobbing continues]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rafael''': Sorry, Eva, I'm not gonna be home for dinner.
:''[Rafael, Pedro and Nico soon notice the strap getting hooked onto the fire extinguisher]''
:'''Blu''': ''[grunts]''
:'''Jewel''': What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': I'm gonna pop this cage open like a soda can. ''[grunting as he hits the side of the cage four times to get the fire extinguisher to fall to the ground, popping it open]''
:'''Nico''': Now, that's popping!
:'''Blu''': Hurry. We gotta help the others.
:'''Pretty Bird''': I'm a pretty bird, I'm a pretty bird. Who's a pretty bird? I'm a pretty bird. Pretty bird, I'm a pretty bird. ''[hysterical laugh]''
:'''Nico''': Come on!
:'''Pedro''': Yeah!
:'''Rafael''': Hurry up, guys!
:'''Trapped Bird''': I'm out! ''[laughs]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[grunting]''
:'''Bat''': Ah! The light!
:'''Blu''': Go! Go! Go!
:'''Pedro''':'' ''Freedom!
:'''All''': ''[yelling and cheering]''
:'''Bird''': Geronimo!
:''[Birds &amp; parrots cheers]''
:'''Jewel''': Come on! Come on! We need to get out!
:'''Blu''': Hey, wait, wait, wait! Wait! ''[pants]''
:'''Jewel''': Um, it's okay. Hey, it's okay. We'll figure this out together. Right? Aah!
:''[after Blu and Jewel have released all the other caged birds, Nigel attacks Blu]''
:'''Jewel''': Let him go!
:''[Nigel hits Jewel away she falls against the wall of the plane and a cage lands on her wing, bruising and injuring it]''
:'''Jewel''': Ow!
:'''Blu''': Jewel!
:'''Jewel''': Ow! My wing.
:'''Nigel''': Oh, pity. Now we have two useless, birds. ''[laughing]''
:''[Blu grabs hold of the hose on the fire extinguisher and attaches it to Nigel's leg]''
:'''Nigel''': Huh?
:'''Blu''': Not cool, man. Not cool!
:''[Blu releases the pressure on the fire extinguisher and Nigel bursts out of the plane]''
:'''Nigel''': ''[screaming]'' Uh-oh. ''[screams]''
:'''Tipa''': Ahh! We're going down! Huh? Okay, okay.
:'''Both''': Rock, paper, scissors...
:'''Marcel''': Chute! Ha, ha! Hasta la vista, losers!
:'''Armando''': [Last Words] Hey! Wait for us! ''[yelling]''
:'''Tipa''':[Last Words] Cannonball!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jewel''': ''[grunting]'' Blu!
:'''Blu''': ''[yells]'' No!
:'''Jewel''': Aah!
:'''Blu''': ''[gasps]''
:''[Blu jumps out out of the plane and grabs hold of Jewel in the air]''
:'''Blu''': Aah!
:'''Jewel''': Blu! You're crazy! What are you doing?
:'''Blu''': I'm not gonna let you go! We're chained to each other birds, remember?
:''[Jewel kisses Blu, heartbeat heard]''
:'''Jewel''': Blu, you're flying!
:'''Blu''': Yeah! Woo-hoo! I'm flying! I'm really flying! You're right! I'm not an ostrich! I'm not an ostrich!
:'''Jewel''': Whoo-hoo! What--? Aah!
:'''Blu''': Whoa! Wh-wh-wh-whoa! ''[chuckles]''
:'''Boy''': Whoa! Dad! Look!
:'''Tipa''': ''[whimpers]''
:'''Marcel''': ''[Last Words]'' Idiots.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[cuts to the abandoned airport runway where a still sad, Linda, Tulio and Fernando are sitting on an airplane aileron wing]''
:'''Fernando''': ''[spots Blu and Jewel and points out to them]'' Linda!
:'''Linda''': Blu? ''[gasps in joy]'' It's Blu! Look, Tulio, it's Blu! And he's flying. My Blu is flying! He's flying. ''[gasps]''
:''[Linda, Tulio and Fernando run towards Blu as he safely lowers Jewel to the ground. Jewel squawks weakly as Blu looks at Jewel, and Linda bends over and gasps when she sees that Jewel's left wing is injured as Blu looks at her]''
:'''Tulio''': ''[to Jewel]'' Here, let me see. Don't worry. I'll take care of you.
:''[scene then cuts to the jungle on a sanctuary tower where Jewel's wing is done healing and the bandage has just been taken off, Tulio then lets Jewel go and she flies off towards the jungle]''
:''[Linda and Blu both imitate booming explosion, then Blu flies over towards the jungle with Jewel]''
:'''Linda''': That's my big, brave boy.
:''[Linda watches as Blu and Jewel fly away towards the jungle]''
:''[&quot;Real in Rio&quot; Reprise plays]''
:'''Luiz:''' ''[Last line, on a hang-glider]'' I love you, Rio!
:'''Nigel''': ''[growls]'' Ahh! ''[gasps in embarrasment]''
:'''Mauro''': ''[He holding the camera laughs and points at Nigel grabs leave gasps and screaming photographs]''
:'''[The End]'''

== Taglines ==
* Join the party!
* Love at first flight
* Drool meets cool
* Party fowl
* If looks could kill
* 1 out of every 6 is afraid of flying.
* He's going to the wildest, most magical place on Earth... home.

==Voice Cast==
* '''[[w:Anne Hathaway|Anne Hathaway]]''' — Jewel 
* '''[[w:Jesse Eisenberg|Jesse Eisenberg]]''' — Blu  
* '''[[w:George Lopez|George Lopez]]''' — Rafael 
* '''[[w:will.i.am|will.i.am]]''' — Pedro 
* '''[[w:Jamie Foxx|Jamie Foxx]]''' — Nico 
* '''[[w:Tracy Morgan|Tracy Morgan]]''' — Luiz 
* '''[[w:Jemaine Clement|Jemaine Clement]]''' — Nigel 
* '''[[w:Leslie Mann|Leslie Mann]]''' — Linda Gunderson
** '''Sofia Scarpa Saldanha''' (young)
* '''[[w:Rodrigo Santoro|Rodrigo Santoro]]''' — Tulio Monteiro/[[w:Soccer|Soccer]] [[w:Announcer|Announcer]]
* '''[[w:Jake T. Austin|Jake T. Austin]]''' — Fernando
* '''[[w:Bernardo de Paula|Bernardo de Paula]]''' — Sylvio/Kipo (voice)
* '''[[w:Wanda Sykes|Wanda Sykes]]''' — Cole
* '''[[w:Jane Lynch|Jane Lynch]]''' — Alice
* '''[[w:Bebel Gilberto|Bebel Gilberto]]''' — Eva
* '''[[Thomas F. Wilson]]''' — Trapped Bird/Screaming [[w:Hang glider|Hang glider]]
* '''Tim Nordquist''' — Other Hang Glider
* '''[[w:Cindy Slattery|Cindy Slattery]]''' — Neurotic Bird
* '''[[w:Jeffrey Garcia|Jeff Garcia]]''' — Tipa/[[w:Bat|Bat]]
* '''[[w:Karen Disher|Karen Disher]]''' — Mother Bird
* '''[[w:Francisco Ramos|Francesco Ramos]]''' — Mauro A.K.A: Lead [[w:Marmoset|Marmoset]]
* '''[[w:Miriam Wallen|Miriam Wallen]]''' — Unnamed Green Bird
* '''Justine Warwick''' — Scaredy Bird
* '''[[w:Carlos Ponce|Carlos Ponce]]''' — Marcel 
* '''Davi Vieira''' — Armando
* '''[[w:Phil Miler|Phil Miler]]''' — Avary intern, [[w:Waiter|1st Waiter]]
* '''[[w:Carlos Saldanha|Carlos Saldanha]]''' — [[w:Waiter|2nd Waiter]]
* '''[[w:Renato D'Angelo|Renato D'Angelo]]''' — Policeman
* '''[[w:Kelly Keaton|Kelly Keaton]]''' — [[w:Bookstore|Bookstore]] Customer/Lady [[w:Tourist|Tourist]]
* '''[[w:Judah Friedlander|Judah Friedlander]]''' — Unnamed Tourist
* '''[[w:Ester Dean|Ester Dean]]''' — Boy in [[w:Gondola Lift|Gondola]]
* '''[[w:Carlos de Oliveira|Carlos de Oliveira]]''' — Gate Guard
* '''[[w:Sergio Mendes|Sergio Mendes]]''' — [[w:Samba School|Samba School]] Director
* '''[[w:Jason Fricchione|Jason Fricchione]]''' — [[w:Truck driver|Truck driver]]

==See also ==
*''[[Rio 2]]''
*''[[Rio 2#Sequel|Rio 3]]''

== External links ==
{{wikipedia|Rio (2011 film)}}

{{Rio}}

{{Authority control}}


[[Category:2011 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2011 American animated films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American animated feature films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:American animated romance films]]
[[Category:Films about parrots and macaws]]
[[Category:Films set in Rio de Janeiro (city)]]
[[Category:Films set in Brazil]]
[[Category:Films directed by Carlos Saldanha]]
[[Category:Films about birds]]
[[Category:Animated films about couples]]
[[Category:Films about animal cruelty]]
[[Category:Films about animal rights]]
[[Category:Animated films about abduction]]
[[Category:Animated films set in South America]]
[[Category:Blue Sky Studios]]</text>
      <sha1>0h2v7ttph2t45b2qqmc0njil6h5pga6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Winnie the Pooh (2011 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>136795</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965090</id>
      <parentid>3954909</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:47:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965090</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10392" sha1="2ep3qn5kwtssmif9lh11vdj9bkctp72" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Winnie the Pooh (2011 film)|Winnie the Pooh]]''''' is a 2011 American [[w:animation|animated]] [[w:musical film|musical]] [[w:comedy film|comedy film]] in which while searching for honey, Pooh and his friends embark on an adventure to find Eeyore's missing tail and rescue Christopher Robin from an unknown monster called the Backson. The film is a reboot of [[w:Winnie the Pooh (Disney)|Disney's ''Winnie the Pooh'']] franchise and is the fifth theatrical ''Winnie the Pooh'' film released. 
:''Directed by [[w:Stephen J. Anderson|Stephen Anderson]] and Don Hall. Written by [[A. A. Milne]] and [[w:Burny Mattinson|Burny Mattinson]].''
{{center/s}}'''Oh Pooh.'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]{{center/e}}

== Tigger ==
* ''[singing his song &quot;The Wonderful Thing About Tiggers&quot;]'' ''Oh, I'm bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy!&lt;br&gt;Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun!&lt;br&gt;But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers is that I'm the only one&lt;br&gt;I'm the only one!&lt;br&gt;Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!''
* This is how you're going to get the Backson. 
* Hey, Piglet, buddy, it's me, Tigger! Do you remember me?!

== Dialogue ==
:''[From trailer]''
:'''Tigger''': Bluga-dee-bloo! ''[pounces on top of Pooh]''
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': A simple hello would do, thank you very much.
:'''Tigger''': It's a dangerous path I bounce, but I bounce it alone. Because the Hundred Acre Wood needs a hero, Pooh Bear, and I'm the only one.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Good morning, Eeyore. Lovely day, isn't it?
:'''Eeyore''': Wish I could say yes, but I can't.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh my, Eeyore. You wouldn't happen to have any honey lying about, would you? You see, I seem to have run out. ''[tummy continues to rumble]'' Oh, yes. Good idea, tummy. Perhaps I should look in back. Bother. No honey in here, either. What? Eeyore, what has happened to your tail?
:'''Eeyore''': What has happened to it?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Well... it isn't there.
:'''Eeyore''': That accounts for a good deal. That explains everything. No wonder. [sighs]
:'''Owl''': Oh! There it is. I'd recognize it anywhere. The very tree where I was hatched. I remember the day Mother made these marks, her giant meaty claw carving furrows in the crumbly bark. Chapter one, the birth of a genius.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Pardon me, Owl. What are you doing?
:'''Owl''': Hmm? Oh, hello, Pooh. Eeyore. Why, I'm penning my personal memoirs. [chuckling] Yes. Now, where was I? Oh, yes, of course. With steely nerve...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Perhaps you could take a short break from your important work and help us find Eeyore's tail?
:'''Owl''': ...and I rocketed towards Eeyore's tail! Eeyore's tail? What's wrong with Eeyore's tail?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Well, it isn't there.
:'''Owl''': Yes. So I see.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Won't you help us, Owl? You have such a talent for speaking and telling us what to do.
:'''Owl''': Oh, thank you, Pooh. Yes, I do, don't I? I didn't think anyone noticed. All right, take this. Write this down carefully. Now, the customary procedure in such cases is as follows…
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Excuse me, Owl, but what does &quot;Crustimoney Proseedcake&quot; mean? For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
:'''Owl''': It means &quot;the thing to do.&quot;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh. Well, as long as it means that, I don't mind.
:'''Owl''': Yes, well, the thing to do is as follows: First, issue a reward...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Gesundheit.
:'''Owl''': I beg your pardon?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Well, you sneezed just as you were going to tell me what the first thing to do was.
:'''Owl''': I didn't sneeze.
:'''Eeyore''': Oh, you did, Owl.
:'''Owl''': No, I didn't! You can't sneeze without knowing it!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Well, you can't know it without something having been sneezed.
:'''Owl''': ''[pauses]'' As I was saying, first: issue a reward...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[to Eeyore]'' He's doing it again. ''[to Owl]'' You must be catching a cold.
:'''Eeyore''': ''[gloomily]'' I'll probably catch it, too.
:'''Owl''': ''[frustrated]'' No, no, no! I'm not catching a cold! The word is ISSUE, not AH-CHOO! And 'ah-choo' isn't even a word! It's just some sort of sneezy sound, like 'Ah-choo!'
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Perhaps you should lie down, Owl.
:'''Owl''': Oh! ''[facepalms and falls over backwards]''
:'''Eeyore''': My throat feels a little scratchy.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Open wide, please.
:'''Eeyore''': Ahh.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Just as I suspected. Owl, we need honey.
:'''Owl''': Enough of this infernal folderol! Look, the thing to do is, we write a notice promising a large something to anyone who finds a replacement tail for Eeyore! Is that clear?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': That sounds like a wonderful plan, Owl.
:'''Owl''': Excellent. Now, we shall get Christopher Robin to write out the notices, and we'll put them up all over the forest.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Perhaps I could borrow some honey. ''[his stomach growls]'' Just a taste. A small lick, I should think.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Silly old bear.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[after seeing his shadow turn into a honey pot]'' Does anybody see that?
:'''Kanga''': See what, honey?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Honey?! ''[tummy rumbles]'' Oh...!
:'''Rabbit''': I can't wait to see the honey on that Backson's honey when he falls into our honey! Eh, Owl?
:'''Owl''': That cheeky honey will honey twice before honeying our honey again!
:'''Roo''': After we honey the honey, can I honey a honey?
:'''Kanga!''': Uh-uh-uh. No honey before honey, honey.
:'''Piglet''': ''[turns into a honey pot in hallucination]'' Honey up, Pooh! We have to honey!
:'''All others''': Honey! Ooh, honey! Yes! Honey!
:'''Narrator''': As Pooh watched the honey honey away, his honey honey honey honey honey honey honey honey honey honey honey...
:''[All the text in the book page reads &quot;honey&quot;.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Pooh, Rabbit, Owl, Eeyore, Kanga and Roo are trapped in a hole and Piglet gets a rope - only to cut it up into six pieces]'' 
:'''Piglet''': And six! There! Now you can ALL get out! 
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': How very thoughtful you are, Piglet.
:'''Rabbit''': ''[loses his patience]'' Good grief! Tie them together, Piglet! Can you tie a knot?
:'''Piglet''': I cannot.
:'''Rabbit''': Ah, so you CAN knot.
:'''Piglet''': No. I cannot knot.
:'''Rabbit''': ''[in disbelief]'' Not knot?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Who's there?
:'''Rabbit''': Pooh!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Pooh who?
:'''Rabbit''': No! Pooh...eh...Piglet, you'll need more than two knots.
:'''Piglet''': Not possible.
:'''Owl''': Ah, so it is possible to knot those pieces.
:'''Piglet''': Not these pieces!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes. Knot those pieces.
:'''Piglet''': Why not?
:'''Eeyore''': Because it's all for naught.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Christopher Robin has returned and everyone hugs him]''
:'''Rabbit''': How did you escape from the Backson?
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[confused]'' &quot;Backson&quot;? What on earth is a Backson?
:'''Kanga''': He wakes up babies!
:'''Tigger''': He swipes your stripes!
:'''Piglet''': He puts out the lights!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes, and... we thought he took you from us.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Who gave you the idea I was taken by a Backson?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Your note.
:''[Pooh hands Christopher Robin the note he left him; Christopher Robin explains that he misread it and what it really meant]''
:'''Narrator''': Christopher Robin explained that it all been a misunderstanding. And now that it was Autumn, the school year had begun. His note was simply to say he had gone out and would be &quot;back ''soon.''&quot;
:'''All but Owl''': Oh...! ''[They glance over at Owl dissatisfied]''
:'''Owl''': Ooh, um... ''[Runs away without a word]''
:'''Christopher Robin''': Okay...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Have you ever had one of those days when you just can't win, Eeyore?
:'''Eeyore''': Yup, I know how that feels.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Last lines]''
:'''Christopher Robin''': You know, Pooh, you did a very important thing today.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I did?
:'''Christopher Robin''': Well, yes; Instead of thinking of your tummy, you thought of your friend!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh, thank you, Christopher Robin! And now, I don't think I shall be hungry again for a good long while! ''[his tummy rumbles]'' Oh, bother...
:'''Christopher Robin''': Silly old bear.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Last lines; in the post-credits scene]''
:'''The Backson''': ''[enters stomping until he spots the trail of objects]'' Wow! It's amazing what you can find in the woods. A marble! And a boot! ''[picks up a blackboard with a chalk drawing of himself]'' And oh, my, that's a scary looking fella. Gosh, maybe these are ''his'' things. You know, I better pick 'em up so they won't get broken. That's the last thing I would want. Whoa, whoa! ''[falls in pit]'' Oof! Oh, my gosh! Is this a pit? I think I'm in a pit! Hello! Is anybody up there? Oh, well. I sure hope that fella will be back soon.

== Taglines ==
* Oh, Pooh.
* An all-new story brought to life on the big screen
* W.T.P.?
* Back where they belong. In theaters everywhere.

== Cast (In Order of Appearance) ==
* '''[[John Cleese]]''' — Narrator
* '''[[w:Jim Cummings|Jim Cummings]]''' — Winnie the Pooh
* '''[[w:Bud Luckey|Bud Luckey]]''' — Eeyore
* '''[[Craig Ferguson]]''' — Owl
* '''Jack Boulter''' — Christopher Robin
* '''[[w:Travis Oates|Travis Oates]]''' — Piglet
* '''[[w:Kristen Anderson-Lopez|Kristen Anderson-Lopez]]''' — Kanga
* '''Wyatt Dean Hall''' — Roo
* '''[[Tom Kenny]]''' — Rabbit
* '''[[w:Jim Cummings|Jim Cummings]]''' — Tigger
* '''[[w:Huell Howser|Huell Howser]]''' — The Backson

== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia|Winnie the Pooh (2011 film)}}
{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2011 animated films]]
[[Category:2011 American animated films]]
[[Category:2010s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:Winnie the Pooh films]]
[[Category:Films set in England]]
[[Category:Films directed by Don Hall]]
[[Category:American films with live action and animation]]</text>
      <sha1>2ep3qn5kwtssmif9lh11vdj9bkctp72</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>146374</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964917</id>
      <parentid>3959659</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:52:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Undid revision [[Special:Diff/3953857|3953857]] by [[Special:Contributions/~2026-34857-32|~2026-34857-32]] ([[User talk:~2026-34857-32|talk]])</comment>
      <origin>3964917</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17616" sha1="ep9yimkwk2wis5gnmpkadxdg3x6a4e4" xml:space="preserve">[[File:The many adventures of winnie the pooh logo 2.png|thumb|Hip Hip Poohray!]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh|The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh]]''''' is a 1977 British-American animated [[w:musical film|musical film]] produced by [[w:Walt Disney Animation Studios|Walt Disney Productions]] and distributed by [[w:Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures|Buena Vista Distribution]]. It was first released on March 11, 1977, and had three short film segments.
:''Directed by [[w:John Lounsbery|John Lounsbery]] and [[w:Wolfgang Reitherman|Wolfgang Reitherman]].''

==The Narrator==
* This could be the room of any small boy. But it just happens to belong to a boy named, Christopher Robin. Like most small boys, Christopher Robin has toy animals to play with and they all live together in a world of make-believe. But his best friend is a bear called Winnie the Pooh, or Pooh or short. Now, Pooh had some very unusual adventures and they all happened here in the Hundred Acre Wood.
* Winnie the Pooh lived in this enchanted forest under the name of Sanders, which means he had the name over the door in gold letters and he lived under it. And if Pooh heard his cuckoo clock, he knew it was time for something. But he was a bear of very little brain. Then as he thought, he thought in the thoughtful way he could think.
* Owl talked from page 41 to page 62, and on page 62, the blustery day turned into a blustery night. To Pooh, it was a very anxious sort of night, filled with anxious sorts of noises, and one of the noises was a sound that had never been heard before.
* Now, the very blustery night turned into a very rainy night. And, Pooh kept his lonely vigil, hour, after hour, after hour, until at last Pooh fell fast asleep and began to dream.
* As a matter it was raining all over the Hundred Acre Wood. There was a thunderstorm on page 71, and on page 73, there was a bit of a cloudburst. It rained, and it rained, and it rained.

==Winnie the Pooh==
* If they can't make it to follow with your direction as I shall away with them

==Kanga==
* Now, if you would ask me, I think it just a wee bit...
* No, no. North, dear.
* Good morning, Pooh!
* Pooh, Roo has a little surprise for you.
* No, Pooh. You don't eat them. You smell them.
* ''[repeated line]'' P-p-p-please!
* Oh, my goodness! Roo, how did you get way up there?
* Oh, gracious. Do be careful, dear!
* Oh, what a shame. That's too bad.
* Let me look at you. You don't want me to look at you? Then you look at me.
* I don't blame you. I'm not like those kangaroos of yours. You can believe in me.
* If I never see that skinny little shrimp again, it will be too soon.

==Dialogue==
:'''The Narrator''': Winnie the Pooh lived in this enchanted forest under the name of Sanders, which means he had the name over the door in gold letters and he lived under it. And if Pooh heard his cuckoo clock... ''[Winnie the Pooh hears his cuckoo clock sound off]'' He knew it was time for something. But he was a bear of very little brain. Then as he thought, he thought in the thoughtful way he could think.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[talking to his reflection in the mirror]'' Haven't thought of anything, have you? ''[shakes his head]'' Well, neither have I. Think, think, think... Oh yes! Time for my stoutness exercise.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''The Narrator''': Winnie the Pooh crawled out of the gorse bush, brushed the prickles from his nose and began to think again.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Think, think, think.
:'''The Narrator''': And the first person he thought of was...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Winnie the Pooh?
:'''The Narrator''': No. Christopher Robin.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh.
:'''The Narrator''': Christopher Robin lived in another part of the forest, where he could be near his friends and help them with their problems. On this summer day, gloomy old Eeyore, being stuffed with sawdust, had lost his tail again.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Eeyore, this won't hurt.
:'''Eeyore''': Never does.
:''[Christopher Robin hammers Eeyore's tail back on him]''
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[accidently hurts his hand]'' Ooh, heh, heh. There now. Did I get your tail back on properly, Eeyore?
:'''Eeyore''': No matter. Most likely lose it again anyway.
:'''Owl''': It is my considered opinion that Eeyore's tail should be placed a trifle to the... right.
:'''Kanga''': Now, if you would ask me, I think it just a wee bit...
:'''Roo''': South!
:'''Kanga''': No, no. North, dear.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Cheer up, Eeyore. Don't be so gloomy. Try swishing it.
:''[Eeyore successfully swishes his tail]''
:'''Owl''': It worked, it worked!
:'''Roo''': Oh Goody! Hooray!
:'''Eeyore''': Thanks. It's not much of a tail, but I'm sort of attached to it.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[enters]'' Good morning, Christopher Robin!
:'''Christopher Robin''': Oh, good morning, Winnie the Pooh!
:'''Kanga''': Good morning, Pooh!
:'''Owl''': Good morning, Pooh!
:'''Roo''': Good morning, Pooh Bear!
:'''Eeyore''': If it is a good morning, which I doubt.
:'''Christopher Robin''': What are you looking for, Pooh Bear?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I just said to myself coming along thinking and wondering if you had such a thing as a umm, such a thing, Christopher... as a balloon about you?
:'''Christopher Robin''': What do you want a balloon for?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Psst... Honey.
:'''Christopher Robin''': But you don't get honey with a balloon.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I do.
:'''Christopher Robin''': How?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I just fly like a bee, up to the honey tree, see!
:'''Christopher Robin''': But, just a minute. You can't fool the bees that way.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': You'll see. Now, would you be so kind as to pull me to a muddy place of which I know of?
:'''The Narrator''': So Christopher Robin pulled Winnie the Pooh to the very muddy place. And Pooh rolled and rolled until he was black all over.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[covering himself with black mud]'' There, now. ''[chuckles]'' Isn't it a clever disguise?
:'''Christopher Robin''': What are you supposed to be?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[looks at himself]'' I'm a little black rain cloud, of course.
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[chuckles]'' Silly old bear.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Now, would you aim me as the bees, please?
:'''Christopher Robin''': Careful, Pooh. Hold on tight. ''[hands Pooh the balloon]''
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Four!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Three!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Two!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes!
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[launches Pooh and his balloon high up]'' One!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[in a sticky voice]'' I must be going now. Goodbye, Rabbit.
:'''Rabbit''': Well, goodbye, if you're sure you won't have any more.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[turns to leave then stops]'' ''Is'' there any more?
:'''Rabbit''': No, there isn't.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I thought not. ''[tries to climb out the front door but gets stuck]'' 
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh, oh, help and bother! I'm stuck.
:'''Rabbit''': Oh, dear. Oh, gracious. Oh. ''[tries to push Pooh out]'' Well, it all comes from eating too much.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[strains]'' It all comes from not having front doors big enough!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Owl''': Blast it all!
:'''Gopher''': Good idea! We'll dynamite! Save time.
:'''Owl''': Eh, what's the charge?
:'''Gopher''': The charge? Oh, about seven sticks of dynamite.
:'''Owl''': Oh, no, no, no, no! The cost! The charge in money.
:'''Gopher''': Nope, no charge account. I work strictly cash.
:'''Owl''': Obviously, but, I should think...
:'''Gopher''': Well, I can't stand around lollygagging all day. I got a tight schedule. ''[falls down a hole, screaming]'' If you think it over, let me know. You got my card. I'm not in the book, you know.
:'''Owl''': Oh. Dash it all, he's gone.
:'''Pooh''': After all, he's not in the book, you know.
:'''Owl''': Oh.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Kanga''': Pooh, Roo has a little surprise for you.
:'''Roo''': Flowers.
:'''Pooh''': Honeysuckle! ''[tries to eat flowers]''
:'''Kanga''': No, Pooh. You don't eat them. You smell them.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh. ''[Winnie the Pooh sniffs the flowers]''
:'''Rabbit''': It's not bad, not bad at all. It's rather good I think.
:''[Winnie the Pooh sneezes, much to Rabbit's dismay]''
:'''Rabbit''': Why did I ever invite that bear to lunch? Why, oh, why, oh, why?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Could you spare a small smackerel?
:'''Gopher''': Say, you ought to do something about that speech impediment, sonny. ''[offers Winnie the Pooh his jar of honey]''
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh, thank you, Gopher.
:'''Rabbit''': Oh, no! Not that! No, no, no, no, no! Not one drop!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': But, Rabbit, I wasn't going to eat it. I was just going to taste it.
:'''Rabbit''': I'll taste it for you.
:'''Gopher''': That supercilious scoundrel confiscated my honey.
:'''Rabbit''': Don't feed the bear!
:'''Gopher''': I'm going to skedaddle. I'm not in the book. And I'm ding danged glad of it!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Rabbit''': Oh, there he goes!
:'''Gopher''': Sufferin' sassafrass! He is sailing clean out of the book! ''Quick, turn the page!''
:''[Winnie the Pooh lands in a hollow in a tree]''
:'''Eeyore''': Stuck again.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Don't worry, Pooh! We'll get you out!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': No hurry. Take your time. Yum, yum! ''[singing]'' Bears love honey and I'm a Pooh bear! Yum, yum, yum, yum! Time for something sweet!
:'''The Narrator''': So we come to the next chapter, in which...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': But, I haven't finished yet!
:'''The Narrator''': But, Pooh, you're in the next chapter.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh. What happens to me?
:'''The Narrator''': Well, let's turn the page and find out. Now one fine day, the east wind traded places with the west wind, and that's turned things up a bit all through the Hundred Acre Wood.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''The Narrator''': Now, Piglet lived in the middle of the forest in a very grand house in the middle of a beech tree. And Piglet loved it very much.
:'''Piglet''': ''[as he's sweeping the leaves on the ground]'' Yes. Oops. You see its been in the family a long time, a... it belonged to my grandfather. Oh, that's his name up there, &quot;Trespassers Will&quot;, that's short for a...Trespassers William.
:'''The Narrator''': Trespassers William?
:'''Piglet''': Yes, and Grandma, she called him TW. That's even shorter.
:'''The Narrator''': Yes, yes, yes, and on this blustery day...
:'''Piglet''': ''[gets caught by a leaf bigger than him]'' Whoa!
:'''The Narrator''': ...the wind was giving you a bit of a bother.
:'''Piglet''': Now, you've been here before. I don't mind the leaves that are leaving. It's the leaves that are coming.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[Owl's Tree crashes to the ground]''
:'''Piglet''': Oh dear, oh dear, dear!
:'''Owl''': ''[pops up]'' Well, I say! Someone hasn't - ''[Winnie the Pooh pops up as well]'' Pooh. Did you do it?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[shakes his head]'' I don't think so.
:'''The Narrator''': As soon as Christopher Robin heard of the disaster, he hurried to the scene of Owl's misfortune.
:'''Christopher Robin''': What a pity. Owl, I don't think we will ever be able to fix it.
:'''Eeyore''': If you ask me, when a house looks like that, it's time to find another one.
:'''Christopher Robin''': That's a very good idea, Eeyore.
:'''Eeyore''': It might take a day or two, but I'll find a new one.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Tigger''': Honey! Oh, boy, honey! That's what Tiggers like best.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I was afraid of that.
:'''Tigger''': ''[gulps down a few handfuls]'' Oh, say. ''[chuckles, then smacks]'' Yecch! Tiggers don't like honey!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': But you said that you liked....
:'''Tigger''': Yeah, that icky, sticky stuff is only fit for Heffalumps and Woozles.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': You mean Elephants and Weasels.
:'''Tigger''': That's what I said, Heffalumps and Woozles.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''The Narrator''': So the Hundred Acre Wood got floodier and floodier. But the water couldn't come up to Christopher Robin's house, so that's where everyone was gathering. It was a time of great excitement. But in the midst of all excitement, Eeyore stubbornly stuck to his task of house hunting for Owl.
:'''Eeyore''': There's one. Cozy cottage. Nice location. Bit damp for Owl though. ''[the house sinks into the water]''
:'''The Narrator''': Meanwhile, little Roo made an important discovery.
:'''Roo''': Look! I've rescued a bottle! And it's got something in it too!
:'''Christopher Robin''': It's a message! And it says: &quot;Help! P-P-Piglet Me!&quot; Owl, you fly over to Piglet's house, and tell him we'll make a rescue.
:'''Owl''': A rescue! Yes, yes, of course, of course.
:'''The Narrator''': So, Owl flew out the flood and he soon spotted two tiny objects below him. One was little Piglet caught in the whirlpool, and the other was Pooh trying to get the last bit of honey from the pot.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Good-bye, Piglet. Now, is the next chapter all about me?
:'''The Narrator''': No, no, it's mostly about Tigger.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh, brother.
:'''The Narrator''': But, you're in it.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh, good. What will I be doing?
: '''The Narrator''': Well, there goes Tigger, always bouncing in on his friends when they least expect him. [the scene fades to Piglet sweeping up leaves when Tigger bounces him] 

&lt;hr width=60%&gt; 
:'''The Narrator:''' Meanwhile, Rabbit was still wandering around in the mist. By now he was lost and bewildered. And to make matters worse, his mind was beginning to play tricks on him. 
:'''Rabbit:''' What’s that? Pooh? Piglet? ''[frog croaks at Rabbit screams, then caterpillar chewing on leaf and gulping at Rabbit gasps, more plus frogs croaking hearing the noises sound]'' Help! 
:'''Tigger:''' Hello, Rabbit! 
:'''Rabbit:''' Tigger! B-B-But… you’re supposed to be lost. 
:'''Tigger:''' Oh! Tiggers never get lost, Bunny Boy. 
:'''Rabbit:''' Never… get… lost. 
:'''Tigger:''' Of course not. 
:'''Rabbit:''' Oh, no. 
:'''Tigger:''' Come on, Rabbit, let’s go home! Hang on! Hoo-hoo-hoo! 
:''[Rabbit screams]'' 
:'''The Narrator:''' So they started back, and Rabbit was now a humiliated Rabbit. A lost and found Rabbit. And “oh, why, oh, why, do these things happen to me” Rabbit. 

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Piglet''': I'm looking down, p-p-p-Pooh.
:'''Tigger''': Hellooooo!
:'''Roo''': Hey Tigger, it's Pooh and Piglet! Pooh! Piglet!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Why, it's only Tigger and Roo. Come on.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Kanga''': Oh, my goodness! Roo, how did you get way up there?
:'''Roo''': Easy, Mama! We bounced up!
:'''Kanga''': Oh, gracious. Do be careful, dear!
:'''Roo''': I'm alright, Mama, but Tigger's stuck! ''[giggles]''
:'''Kanga''': Oh, what a shame. That's too bad.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Christopher Robin:''' Pooh, what do you like doing best in the world?
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' What I like best is me going to visit you and you saying &quot;how about a smackarill of honey?&quot;
:'''Christopher Robin:''' I like that too. But what I like best is just doing nothing.
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' How do you do just nothing?
:'''Christopher Robin:''' Well, it's when the grown-ups ask&quot; what are you going to do?&quot; and you're saying nothing and then you go out and do it.
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' I like that. Let's do it all the time!
:'''Christopher Robin:''' You know something Pooh? I'm not going to do just nothing any more.
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' You mean never again?
:'''Christopher Robin:''' Well, not so much. Pooh, when I'm away just doing nothing will you come up here sometimes?
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' You mean alone? Just me?
:'''Christopher Robin:''' Yes. And Pooh. Promise you won't forget me, ever?
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' Oh I won't Christopher, I promise.
:'''Christopher Robin:''' Not even when I'm a hundred?
:'''Winnie the Pooh:''' How old shall I be then?
:'''Christopher Robin:''' Ninety-nine, silly old bear.
:'''The Narrator:''' Wherever they go and whatever happens to them on the way in that enchanted place on top of the forest, a little bear will always be waiting.

==Voice Characters==
* Winnie the Pooh, voiced by [[w:Sterling Holloway|Sterling Holloway]]
* Christopher Robin, voiced by [[w:Bruce Reitherman|Bruce Reitherman]], [[w:Jon Walmsley|Jon Walmsley]] and [[w:Timothy Turner (actor)|Timothy Turner]]
* Tigger, voiced by [[w:Paul Winchell|Paul Winchell]]
* Piglet, voiced by [[w:John Fiedler|John Fiedler]]
* Eeyore, voiced by [[w:Ralph Wright|Ralph Wright]]
* Rabbit, voiced by [[w:Junius Matthews|Junius Matthews]]
* Kanga, voiced by [[w:Barbara Luddy|Barbara Luddy]]
* Roo, voiced by [[w:Clint Howard|Clint Howard]]
* Owl, voiced by [[w:Hal Smith (actor)|Hal Smith]]
* Gopher, voiced by [[w:Howard Morris|Howard Morris]]
* Narrated by [[w:Sebastian Cabot (actor)|Sebastian Cabot]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Commons cat|The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (film)}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0076363|title=The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh}}
{{Authority control}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, The}}
[[Category:1970s American animated films]]
[[Category:1977 animated films]]
[[Category:1977 American animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:Winnie the Pooh films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Wolfgang Reitherman]]</text>
      <sha1>ep9yimkwk2wis5gnmpkadxdg3x6a4e4</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>147762</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965091</id>
      <parentid>3907546</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:47:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965091</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4725" sha1="n7109ow57yx622jsyvfe2agmhw62px1" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree|Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree]]''''' is a 1966 American short film combining live-action and animation. It was produced by [[w:Walt Disney Animation Studios|Walt Disney Productions]] and released by [[w:Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures|Buena Vista Distribution]] on February 4, 1966. Based on the first two chapters of the ''[[w:Winnie-the-Pooh (book)|Winnie-the-Pooh]]'' book written by [[A. A. Milne]], it is the only [[w:Winnie the Pooh (franchise)|Winnie the Pooh]] production released under [[Walt Disney]]'s supervision before his death later that year. Music and lyrics were written by the [[w:Sherman Brothers|Sherman Brothers]], ([[Richard M. Sherman]] and [[Robert B. Sherman]]). Background music was provided by [[w:Buddy Baker (composer)|Buddy Baker]].
{{center|'''DELIGHTFUL ENTERTAINMENT! At last, the &quot;bear of very little brain&quot; but, lots of enchanted stuff(ing) brings his pooh-whimsy to the screen.''' ([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

== Dialogue ==
:'''Christopher Robin''': What do you want a balloon for?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I shall fly like a bee, up to the honey tree, see?
:'''Christopher Robin''': But, just a minute. You can't fool the bees that way.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': You'll see.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': There, now. ''[chuckles]'' Isn't it a clever disguise?
:'''Christopher Robin''': What are you supposed to be?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[looks at himself]'' I'm a little black rain cloud, of course.
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[chuckles]'' Silly old bear.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Now, would you aim me at the bees, please?
:'''Christopher Robin''': Careful, Pooh. Hold on tight. ''[hands Pooh the balloon]''
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Four!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Three!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Two!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Yes!
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[launches Pooh and his balloon high up]'' One!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''The Narrator''': Winnie the Pooh crawled out of the gorse bush, brushed the prickles from his nose, and began to think again.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Think, think, think.
:'''The Narrator''': And the first person he thought of was...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Winnie the Pooh?
:'''The Narrator''': ''[chuckles]'' No, Christopher Robin.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Christopher Robin''': Pooh Bear, there's only one thing you can do. Wait for you to get thin again.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh, bother. How long will that take?
:'''Eeyore''': Days, weeks, months, who knows?

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
''[hole pops]''
:'''Rabbit''': Oh, there he goes!
:'''Gopher''': Sufferin' sassafrass! He is sailing clean out of the book! ''Quick, turn the page!''
:''[Winnie the Pooh lands in a hollow in a tree]''
:'''Eeyore''': Stuck again.
:'''Christopher Robin''': Don't worry, Pooh! We'll get you out!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': No hurry! Take your time! Yum, yum! ''[singing]'' Bears love honey and I'm a Pooh bear! Yum, yum, yum, yum! Time for something sweet!
:''[The book closed]''
:'''Chorus''': Winnie the Pooh, Winnie the Pooh, where you nelly… ''[Pooh winks]'' …silly old bear!

The End - A Walt Disney Production/Disney Videos

== Tagline==
*DELIGHTFUL ENTERTAINMENT! At last, the &quot;bear of very little brain&quot; but lots of enchanted stuff(ing) brings his pooh-whimsy to the screen.

==Voice Cast==
* [[w:Sterling Holloway|Sterling Holloway]] - &lt;span style=color:red&gt;Winnie the Pooh&lt;/span&gt; &lt;span style=color:yellow&gt;Bear&lt;/span&gt;
* [[w:Bruce Reitherman|Bruce Reitherman]] - Christopher Robin
* [[w:Junius Matthews|Junius Matthews]] - Rabbit
* [[w:Hal Smith (actor)|Hal Smith]] - Owl
* [[w:Howard Morris|Howard Morris]] - &lt;span style=color:gray&gt;Gopher&lt;/span&gt;
* [[w:Ralph Wright|Ralph Wright]] - Eeyore
* [[w:Clint Howard|Clint Howard]] - Roo
* [[w:Barbara Luddy|Barbara Luddy]] - &lt;span style=color:brown&gt;Kanga&lt;/span&gt;
* [[w:Jimmy MacDonald (sound effects artist)|James MacDonald]] - The Bees
* [[w:Dallas McKennon|Dallas McKennon]] - The Bees
* [[w:Ginny Tyler|Ginny Tyler]] - The Bees
* [[w:Sebastian Cabot (actor)|Sebastian Cabot]] - The Narrator

==Residents of the Hundred Acre Wood==
* Winnie-the-Pooh
* Kanga
* Roo
* Rabbit
* Christoper Robin
*

==Places in the Wood==
* Pooh Bear's House
* Kanga's House
* Rabbit's House
* Christoper Robin's House
*

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0061199}}

[[Category:1966 animated films]]
[[Category:1966 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated films]]
[[Category:Animated musical films]]
[[Category:Animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Winnie the Pooh films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Wolfgang Reitherman]]</text>
      <sha1>n7109ow57yx622jsyvfe2agmhw62px1</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>147763</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965088</id>
      <parentid>3861947</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:45:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965088</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8443" sha1="ba0bci8nxbr44n96wvqpyiogppxmfhw" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day|Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day]]''''' is a [[w:1968 in film|1968]] American animated short film based on the third, fifth, ninth, and tenth chapters of ''[[w:Winnie-the-Pooh|Winnie the Pooh]]'' and second, eighth, ninth chapters from.
:''Directed by [[w:Wolfgang Reitherman|Wolfgang Reitherman]]. Written by [[w:Winston Hibler|Winston Hibler]], [[w:Larry Clemmons|Larry Clemmons]], [[w:Ralph Wright|Ralph Wright]], Julius Svendsen, and Vance Gerry, based on stories from the [[Winnie-the-Pooh]] by [[A. A. Milne]]. 
{{center|'''Hip Hip Poohray!''' ([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

== Sources ==
The film plot is based primarily on seven A. A. Milne stories: &quot;In which Pooh &amp; Piglet go hunting and nearly catch a Woozle&quot; (Chapter III of Winnie the Pooh), &quot;In which Piglet does a very Grand thing&quot; (Chapter VIII from The House at Pooh Corner), &quot;In which Eeyore finds the Wolery and Owl moves into it&quot; (Chapter IX from The House at Pooh Corner), &quot;In which Tigger comes to the Forest and has breakfast&quot; (Chapter II from The House at Pooh Corner), &quot;In which Piglet meets a Heffalump&quot; (Chapter V from Winnie-the-Pooh: Winnie the Pooh's nightmare of Heffalumps and Woozles), &quot;In which Piglet is entirely surrounded by water and get's rescued&quot; (Chapter IX of Winnie-the-Pooh), and &quot;In which Christopher Robin gives a Pooh Party and we say goodbye&quot; (Chapter X of Winnie-the-Pooh). In A. A. Milne's original story, Pooh shows more initiative during the flood, finding his way to Christopher Robin by riding on one of his floating honey pots, which he names The Floating Bear, then having the inspiration of using Christopher Robin's umbrella to carry them both to Piglet's house.

== Dialogue ==
:'''Tigger''': ''[Tigger pounces on Winnie the Pooh]'' Hello! I'm Tigger!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Oh... you scared me!
:'''Tigger''': Yeah, sure I did. ''[laughs]'' Everyone's scared of Tiggers! And who are you?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I'm Pooh.
:'''Tigger''': Oh, Pooh. Hoo-hoo-hoo, sure... er... what's a Pooh?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': You're sitting on one.
:'''Tigger''': I am? ''[shakes Pooh's paw]'' Well, glad to meet ya. Name's Tigger. T, I, double guh err. That spells Tigger.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tigger's Voice''': Heffalumps and Woozles..... Heffalumps and Woozles.... steal honey.... Beware..... Beware......

:'''Honeypot Singers''':
They're black, they're brown, they're up, they're down
They're in, they're out, they're all about

They're far, they're near, they're gone, they're here
They're quick or slick, they're insincere
Beware, beware
Be a very wary bear

A Heffalump or Woozle
Is very confusil
A Heffalump or Woozle's very sly
Sly, sly, sly

They come in ones and twosles
But if they so choozles
Before your eyes you'll see them multiply
Ply, ply, ply

They're extraordinary
So better be wary
Because they come in every shape and size
Size, size, size

If honey's what you covet
You'll find that they love it
Because they'll guzzle up the things you prize

They're green, they're blue, they're pink, they're white, 
They're round, they're square, they're a terrible sight
They tie themselves in horrible knots
They come in stripes or polka dots
Beware, beware
Be a very wary bear

''[medium instrumental]''

''[slow instrumental]''

Hef, Hef,
Huff, Huff!

''[medium instrumental with two lines]''

They're extraordinary
So better be wary
Because they come in every shape and size
Size, size, size

If honey's what you covet
You'll find that they love it
Because they'll guzzle up the things you prize

They're black, they're brown, they're up, they're down
They're in, they're out, they're all about
They're far, they're near, they're gone, they're here
They're quick or slick, they're insincere
Beware, beware
Beware, beware

Beware!

:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Is it raining in there? It's raining out here, too.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tigger''': Honey! Oh, boy, honey! That's what Tiggers like best.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': I was afraid of that.
:'''Tigger''': ''[gulps down a few handfuls]'' Oh, say. ''[chuckles]'' Yuck! Tiggers don't like honey!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': But you said you that you liked...
:'''Tigger''': Yeah, that icky, sticky stuff is only fit for Heffalumps and Woozles.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': You mean Elephants and Weasels.
:'''Tigger''': That's what I said, Heffalumps and Woozles.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Happy &quot;Winds-day&quot;, Piglet.
:'''Piglet''': ''[being blown away]'' Well... it isn't... very happy... f-for me.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Where are you going, Piglet?
:'''Piglet''': That's what I'm asking myself, where? ''[A gust of wind lifted Piglet into the air]'' W-Whoops! P-P-P-Pooh!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[grabbing Piglet's scarf]'' And what do you think you will answer yourself?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Roo''': Look, mama, look! A kite!
:'''Kanga''': Oh, my goodness! It's Piglet!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[Being dragged behind Piglet]'' Happy Windsday, Kanga. Happy Windsday, Roo.
:'''Roo''': Can I fly Piglet next, Pooh?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tigger''': ''[looking at his reflection]'' Oh, hey, hey. Look, look, look. ''[gasps]'' What a strange-looking creature. Mmm, look at those beady little eyes, and that &quot;purrposterous&quot; chin, and those &quot;rickydickorous&quot; striped pajamas.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': Looks like another Tigger to me.
:'''Tigger''': Oh, no, it's not. ''I'm'' the only Tigger. Watch me scare the stripes off of this imposter. ''[chuckles and growls at reflection; he scares himself, hides under the table]'' Is-Is-Is... Is he gone?
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': All except for the tail. ''[Tigger tucks his tail]'' He's gone. ''[lifts the tablecloth]'' You can come out now, Tigger. ''[gets no response]'' Tigger?
:'''Tigger''': ''[pounces Pooh again]'' Hello, I'm Tigger!
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': You said that.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Christopher Robin''': ''[Looks at Owl's demolished house]'' What a pity. Owl, I don't think we'll ever be able to fix it.
:'''Eeyore''': If you ask me, when a house looks like that, it's time to find another one.
:'''Christopher Robin''': That's a very good idea, Eeyore.
:'''Eeyore''': Might take a day or two, but I'll find a new one.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Christopher Robin''': It is a nice house, Eeyore, but...
:'''Kanga''': It is a lovely house, Eeyore, but...
:'''Piglet''': ''[near tears]'' It's the best house in the... whole world.
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[whispering]'' Tell them it's your house, Piglet.
:'''Piglet''': No, Pooh. This house belongs to our very dear friend... Owl.
:'''Rabbit''': But Piglet, where will ''you'' live?
:'''Piglet''': ''[starts to walk away]'' Well, I guess I shall live... I suppose I shall live...
:'''Winnie the Pooh''': ''[taking Piglet's hand]'' With me. You shall live with me. Won't you, Piglet?
:'''Piglet''': With you? Oh, thank you, Pooh Bear. Of course I will.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rabbit''': ''[chasing after Pooh and Piglet with his wheelbarrow]'' Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! ''[realizes that they've kicked all his carrots into his wheelbarrow]'' Oh ''yes''! Well, next time, I hope he blows right through my rutabaga patch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Piglet''': And Piglet, too!
:'''[Pooh winked his eye, text reads &quot;The End&quot; &quot;A Walt Disney Production&quot;]

== Taglines ==
* Hip Hip Poohray!
* All Nooh!

== Cast ==
* [[w:Sterling Holloway|Sterling Holloway]] - &lt;span style=color:yellow&gt;Winnie the Pooh&lt;/span&gt;
* [[w:Paul Winchell|Paul Winchell]] - &lt;span style=color:orange&gt;Tigger&lt;/span&gt;
* [[w:John Fiedler|John Fiedler]] - &lt;span style=color:pink&gt;Piglet&lt;/span&gt;
* [[w:Clint Howard|Clint Howard]] - Roo
* [[w:Barbara Luddy|Barbara Luddy]], [[w:Robie Lester|Robie Lester]] (singing voice) - Kanga
* [[w:Ralph Wright|Ralph Wright]] - Eeyore
* [[w:Hal Smith (actor)|Hal Smith]] - Owl
* [[w:Junius Matthews|Junius Matthews]] - Rabbit
* [[w:Jon Walmsley|Jon Walmsley]] - Christopher Robin
* [[w:Howard Morris|Howard Morris]] - Gopher
* Narrated by [[w:Sebastian Cabot (actor)|Sebastian Cabot]]
* [[w:The Mellomen|The Mellomen]] - Singers

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|63819}}

[[Category:1968 animated films]]
[[Category:1968 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated films]]
[[Category:Animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Animated musical films]]
[[Category:Winnie the Pooh films]]
[[Category:Best Animated Short Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Films directed by Wolfgang Reitherman]]</text>
      <sha1>ba0bci8nxbr44n96wvqpyiogppxmfhw</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Fighting</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>148017</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965070</id>
      <parentid>3941315</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:51:53Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Undid revision [[Special:Diff/3941315|3941315]] by [[Special:Contributions/~2026-29315-06|~2026-29315-06]] ([[User talk:~2026-29315-06|talk]])</comment>
      <origin>3965070</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="25514" sha1="l2j89s2ncb6kiva2ptbb7xbm4mxhfuh" xml:space="preserve">[[File:The Old Flag Never Touched the Ground.jpg|thumb|One doesn't fight only when one is optimistic. One fights because it is the right thing to do. ~ [[Dennis Prager]]]]
[[File:Lightning strike jan 2007.jpg |thumb|If there is no [[struggle]], there is no [[progress]]. Those who profess to favor [[freedom]], and yet depreciate agitation, are men who want crops without plowing up the ground. They want [[rain]] without [[thunder]] and [[lightning]]… ~ [[Frederick Douglass]]]]
[[File:Bruce Lee Statue.jpg|thumb|right|When you're talking about fighting, as it is, with no [[rules]], well then, baby you'd better train every part of your [[body]]! ~ [[Bruce Lee]]]]
[[File:Bob-Marley.jpg|thumb|right|[[Truth]] is the [[light]], &lt;br /&gt; So you [[never]] give up the fight. ~ [[Bob Marley]]]]

'''{{w|Combat|Combat}}''' or '''fighting''' is a purposeful violent conflict meant to weaken, or establish dominance over the opposition, or to kill the opposition, or drive the opposition away from a location where it is not wanted or needed.

== Quotes ==
* We're gonna fight &lt;br&gt; We know who's right &lt;br&gt; (Not them) &lt;br&gt; Time to unite &lt;br&gt; We're having our say &lt;br&gt; (Me and you) &lt;br&gt; Oppressed us long &lt;br&gt; They've done us wrong &lt;br&gt; (Dumb fools) &lt;br&gt; You stand up tall &lt;br&gt; The futures ours &lt;br&gt; (No rules) &lt;br&gt; Me and you &lt;br&gt; We're gonna fight the narrow minds &lt;br&gt; Make are own rules &lt;br&gt; Live your life at all
** [[7 Seconds (band)|7 Seconds]], ''We're Gonna Fight, {{w|Walk Together, Rock Together}}'' (1985)

* Fighting men are the city's fortress.
** [[:w:Alcaeus of Mytilene|Alcæus]], ''Fragment'', XXII. Quotes reported in ''[[Wikisource:Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations (1922)|Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations]]'' (1922), p. 841-60.

* Fifty-four forty (54° 40´ N.), or fight.
** Senator William Allen, in the U. S. Senate, on the {{w|Oregon boundary dispute}} (1844).

* The Minstrel Boy will return we pray &lt;br&gt; When we hear the news we all will cheer it, &lt;br&gt; The minstrel boy will return one day, &lt;br&gt; Torn perhaps in body, not in spirit. &lt;br&gt; Then may he play on his harp in peace, &lt;br&gt; In a world such as heaven intended, &lt;br&gt; For all the bitterness of man must cease, &lt;br&gt; And ev'ry battle must be ended. 
** [[Anonymous]], [[American Civil War]] circa appended third verse to “[[w:The Minstrel Boy|The Minstrel Boy]]”, ''Irish Melodies'', (1813) 

* Struggle is very tough and when you cross that line, you risk going to jail, getting seriously hurt, killed, and watching your comrades getting seriously hurt and killed. That is not a pretty picture, but that is what happens when you fight an entrenched oppressor. We are struggling and will make it rough for them, but struggle is also going to be rough for us too. This is why we have to find ways to love and support each other through tough times.
** [[Ashanti Alston]], ''[https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/ashanti-omowali-alston-black-anarchism Black Anarchism]'', transcript of a speech given at Hunter College, NYC, on October 24th, 2003, sponsored by the {{w|Institute for Anarchist Studies}} and the Student Liberation Action Movement. Transcribed by Chuck Morse.

* If I am asked what we are fighting for, I can reply in two sentences. In the first place, to fulfil a solemn international obligation … an obligation of honor which no self-respecting man could possibly have repudiated. I say, secondly, we are fighting to vindicate the principle that small nationalities are not to be crushed in defiance of international good faith at the arbitrary will of a strong and overmastering Power.
** Premier [[H. H. Asquith]], to House of Commons, Declaration of War with Germany, August 4, 1914.

*BATTLE, n. A method of untying with the teeth of a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.
** [[Ambrose Bierce]], ''The Cynic's Dictionary'' (1906); republished as ''The Devil's Dictionary'' (1911).

* '''As long as women suffer as they do I will fight! As long as little children hungering go, as they now do, I will fight.''' As long as men go to the prisons, in and out, in and out, as they now do, I will fight. All who are not on the ship are in the sea. Every Soldier must do his utmost to save them.
** An unspecified platform appeal, as quoted in ''The Musical Salvationist'' (September 1927). Several variants of this exist, some of them credited to his speech at the Royal Albert Hall on May 9, 1912, as researched [http://www1.salvationarmy.org/heritage.nsf/36c107e27b0ba7a98025692e0032abaa/cdc6918c833e9a3d802568cc00539b8f!OpenDocument &quot;While Women Weep - I'll Fight&quot; by Gordon Taylor at the International Heritage Centre (19 July 1996)]
** Variants:
** While women weep as they do now, I'll fight. While little children go hungry as they do now, I'll fight,. while men go to prison, in and out, in and out, as they do now, I'll fight.
*** As quoted in &quot;To the General&quot; by Charles Coller, in ''All the World'' (April 1906), p. 169
** While women weep, as they do now, I'll fight; while little children go hungry, as they do now, I'll fight; while men go to prison, in and out, in and out, as they do now, I'll fight; while there is a drunkard left, while there is a poor lost girl upon the streets, while there remains one dark soul without the light of God, I'll fight — I'll fight to the very end! 
*** As quoted in ''Booth the Beloved'' (1949) by J. Evan Smith, pp. 122-124; this version seems to have become the basis of the most quoted variants.
** '''While Women weep as they do now, I'll fight.''' While little children go hungry, as they do now, I'll fight. While men go to prison, in and out, in and out, I'll fight. While there is a drunkard left, while there is a poor lost girl upon the streets, While there remains one dark soul without the light of God, I'll fight. I'll fight to the very end!
*** [[William Booth]] as quoted in ''What price the poor? William Booth, Karl Marx and the London Residuum'' (2005) by Ann M. Woodall, p. 218

* Without excuse and self-consideration of health or limb or life, true soldiers fight, live to fight, love the thickest of the fight, and die in the midst of it.
** [[William Booth]] as quoted in ''Revolution'' (2005) by Stephen Court &amp; Aaron White &lt;!-- Credo Press, 2005. Vancouver, British Columbia --&gt;.

* We must fight those who are committed to destruction, without replicating their destructiveness. Understanding how to fight in this way is the task and the bind of a [[nonviolent]] ethics and politics.
** [[Judith Butler]], {{cite book |title=The Force of Nonviolence: An Ethico-Political Bind |date=4 February 2020 |publisher=Verso Books |isbn=978-1-78873-276-5 |page=64}}

* For those that fly may fight again,&lt;br&gt;Which he can never do that's slain.
** [[Samuel Butler (poet)|Samuel Butler]], ''Hudibras'', Part III (1678), Canto III, line 243.

* For he who fights and runs away&lt;br&gt;May live to fight another day;&lt;br&gt;But he who is in battle slain&lt;br&gt;Can never rise and fight again.
** [[Samuel Butler (poet)|Samuel Butler]]'s lines misquoted by [[Oliver Goldsmith]] in a publication of Newbery, the publisher, The Art of Poetry on a New Plan, Volume II, p. 147. The first lines appear in Musarum Deliciæ. Collection by Sir John Mennis and Dr. James Smith. (1656). Accredited by some authorities to Suckling, but not confirmed by Mennis. &quot;Oft he that doth abide / Is cause of his own paine, / But he that flieth in good tide / Perhaps may fight again.&quot; A Pleasant Satyre or Poesie. From the French. (About 1595).

* War is a quarrel between two thieves too cowardly to fight their own battle.
**[[Thomas Carlyle]], as quoted by [[Emma Goldman]] in her essay, &quot;Patriotism: A Menace to Liberty&quot;, chapter five of ''Anarchism and Other Essays'' (2nd revised edition, 1911).

* They now to fight are gone;&lt;br&gt;Armor on armor shone:&lt;br&gt;Drum now to drum did groan,&lt;br&gt;  To hear was wonder;&lt;br&gt;That with the cries they make,&lt;br&gt;The very earth did shake;&lt;br&gt;Trumpet to trumpet spake,&lt;br&gt;  Thunder to thunder.
** [[Michael Drayton]], ''Ballad of Agincourt'', Stanza 8. Quotes reported in ''[[Wikisource:Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations (1922)|Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations]]'' (1922), p. 841-60.

* ''Qui fugiebat, rusus præliabitur.''
** The man who flies shall fight again.
*** [[Demosthenes]], on his flight at the battle of Chæronea, B.C. 338. Credited to him by Tertullian—De Fuga in Persecutione, Section X. See Cardinal Newman—Church of The Fathers, p. 215. Same expression in Ælianus. 1. 3. 4. 5. Aulus Gellius, Book XVII. 21. 32. Nepos—Thrasbulus, Chapter II. Justinus. 9. 6.

* Let me give you a word of the philosophy of reform. The whole [[history]] of the [[progress]] of human [[liberty]] shows that all concessions yet made to her august claims, have been born of earnest struggle. The conflict has been exciting, agitating, all-absorbing, and for the time being, putting all other tumults to silence. It must do this or it does nothing. '''If there is no struggle, there is no progress. Those who profess to favor [[freedom]], and yet depreciate agitation, are men who want crops without plowing up the ground. They want rain without thunder and lightning. They want the ocean without the awful roar of its many waters.''' This struggle may be a moral one; or it may be a physical one; or it may be both moral and physical; but it must be a struggle. '''Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will. Find out just what any people will quietly submit to, and you have found out the exact amount of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them'''; and these will continue till they are resisted with either words or blows, or with both. The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress. [...] '''Men might not get all they work for in this world, but they must certainly work for all they get.''' If we ever get free from the oppressions and wrongs heaped upon us, we must pay for their removal. We must do this by labor, by suffering, by sacrifice, and if needs be, by our lives and the lives of others.
** [[Frederick Douglass]], ''An address on West India Emancipation'' (3 August 1857), according to ''Frederick Douglass : Selected Speeches and Writings'', p. vi ; other sources give 4 August 1857. Other citation source: Frederick Douglass, West India Emancipation Speech, Delivered at Canandaigua, New York (Aug. 4, 1857), in ''2 The Life and Writings of Frederick Douglass'' 437 (Philip S. Foner ed., 1950).

* That same man that renneth awaie&lt;br&gt;Maie fight again on other daie.
** [[Erasmus]], ''Apothegms''. Given as a saying of Demosthenes, and quoted as a &quot;verse common in every body's mouth.&quot; Tr. by Udall. (1542).

* On the wide and silent plain, darkening the bright daylight, she turns midday into darkness. People look upon each other in anger, they look for combat. Their shouting disturbs the plain, it weighs on the pasture and the waste land. Her howling is like Ickur's and makes the flesh of all the lands tremble. No one can oppose her murderous battle -- who rivals her? No one can look at her fierce fighting, the carnage, the engulfing water, raging, sweeping over the earth, she leaves nothing behind.
** About [[Inana]], in ''[http://etcsl.orinst.ox.ac.uk/section4/tr4073.htm A Hymn to Inana]'' (23rd century BCE) by [[Enheduanna]], lines 49-59.

* War means fighting, and fighting means killing.
**[[Nathan Bedford Forrest]], as quoted in ''May I Quote You, General Forrest?'' by Randall Bedwell.

* ''You did not break me &lt;br&gt; I'm still fighting for [[peace]]''
** [[Sia Furler]], {{w|Thomas Wesley Pentz}}, {{w|Andrew Swanson}} and {{w|Abel Tesfaye}}, ''{{w|Elastic Heart}}'', ''{{w|The Hunger Games: Catching Fire – Original Motion Picture Soundtrack}}'' (2013)

* It is an olde saw, he fighteth wele (well) that fleith faste.
** Gesta Romanorum. ''Wolf and the Hare''. 15th cent. MS.

* I propose to fight it out on this line if it takes all summer.
** [[Ulysses S. Grant]], Dispatch from Spottsylvania Court House (May 11, 1864).

* '''Though I have been trained as a [[soldier]], and participated in many battles, there never was a time when, in my opinion, some way could not be found to prevent the drawing of the [[sword]].''' I look forward to an epoch when a [[court]], recognized by all nations, will settle international differences, instead of keeping large standing armies as they do in [[Europe]].
** [[Ulysses S. Grant]] as quoted in &quot;International [[Arbitration]]&quot; by W. H. Dellenback in ''The Commencement Annual, University of Michigan'' (30 June 1892) and in ''A Half Century of International Problems: A Lawyer's Views'' (1954) by [[w:Frederic René Coudert|Frederic René Coudert]], p. 180.

* Every position must be held to the last man. There must be no retirement. With our backs to the wall, and believing in the justice of our cause, each one of us must fight to the end.
** Field Marshal Haig. At the battle of Picardy. (1918). See also Geddes. Song probably well known to Haig. Quotes reported in ''[[Wikisource:Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations (1922)|Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations]]'' (1922), p. 841-60.

* ''We fought him hard we fought him well &lt;br&gt; Out on the plains we gave him hell &lt;br&gt; But many came too much for Cree &lt;br&gt; Oh will we ever be set free?''
* ''Riding through dust clouds and barren wastes &lt;br&gt; Galloping hard on the plains &lt;br&gt; Chasing the redskins back to their holes &lt;br&gt; Fighting them at their own game &lt;br&gt; Murder for freedom the stab in the back &lt;br&gt; Women and children are cowards attack &lt;br&gt; Run to the hills, run for your lives.''
** [[w:Steve Harris (musician)|Steve Harris]], ''{{w|Run to the Hills}}, {{w|The Number of the Beast}}'' (1982)

* ''There is no longer any room for hope''. If we wish to be free—if we mean to preserve inviolate those inestimable privileges for which we have been so long contending—if we mean not basely to abandon the noble struggle in which we have been so long engaged, and which we have pledged ourselves never to abandon, until the glorious object of our contest shall be obtained—we must fight!—I repeat it, sir, we must fight!! An appeal to arms and to the God of Hosts, is all that is left us!
** [[Patrick Henry]], speech to the Virginia Convention, Richmond, Virginia (March 23, 1775); in William Wirt, ''Sketches of the Life and Character of Patrick Henry'' (1836, reprinted 1970), 9th ed., p. 140.

* Our business in the field of fight&lt;br&gt;Is not to question, but to prove our might.
** [[Homer]], ''The Iliad'', Book XX, line 304. Pope's translation

* We don't want to fight, but by jingo if we do,&lt;br&gt;We've got the ships, we've got the men, we've got the money too.&lt;br&gt;We've fought the Bear before and while we're Britons true,&lt;br&gt;  The Russians shall not have Constantinople.
** [[G. W. Hunt]]. (Called &quot;the Kipling of the Halls.&quot;) As sung by the &quot;Great McDermott,&quot; in 1878 it made the term &quot;Jingo&quot; popular. &quot;Jingo,&quot; first used as a political term of reproach, by [[George Jacob Holyoake]], in a letter to the London Daily News, March 13, 1878. &quot;He … falls a-fighting it out of one hand into the other, tossing it this way and that; lets it run a little upon the line, then tanutus, high jingo, come again.&quot; Traced by the Oxford Dict. to John Eachard—Grounds and Occasion of the Contempt of Clergy. 1670, p. 34. See also [[John Oldham]], ''Satires upon the Jesuits'' (1679), IV. &quot;By Jingo&quot; found in a translation. of Rabelais—Pantagruel, Book IV, Chapter LV. Also in Cowley—Cutter of Coleman Street, pub. 1663, performed, 1661. &quot;By the living Jingo&quot; in Goldsmith—Vicar of Wakefield, Chapter X.

* When I go into the hub of the battle, I go as one who brings forth its brightest light.
** [[Inanna]], ''[http://etcsl.orinst.ox.ac.uk/section4/tr4077.htm A hymn (shir-namshub) to Inana]'' (Inana G) at {{w|The Electronic Text Corpus of Sumerian Literature}}.

*The zeal of free men fighting for a cause has historically trumped imperialistic thuggism.
**Eugene A. Jewett, [http://www.amazon.com/gp/customer-reviews/R13KHS2TAGOV99/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_rvw_ttl?ie=UTF8&amp;ASIN=0385720599 &quot;He loosed his fateful lightning and his terrible swift sword&quot;] (27 January 2002), ''Amazon''

* These moments of nocturnal prowling leave an indelible impression. Eyes and ears are tensed to the maximum, the rustling approach of strange feet in the tall grass in an unutterably menacing thing. Your breath comes in shallow bursts; you have to force yourself to stifle any panting or wheezing. There is a little mechanical click as the safety-catch of your pistol is taken off; the sound cuts straight through your nerves. Your teeth are grinding on the fuse-pin of the hand-grenade. The encounter will be short and murderous. You tremble with two contradictory impulses: the heightened awareness of the huntsmen, and the terror of the quarry. You are a world to yourself, saturated with the appalling aura of the savage landscape.
** [[Ernst Jünger]], ''Storm of Steel'' (1920), p. 71

* '''When you're talking about fighting, as it is, with no [[rules]], well then, baby you'd better [[train]] every part of your [[body]]!'''
** ''Bruce Lee: The Lost Interview'' (1971)

*Why do men fight who were born to be brothers?
**[[James Longstreet]], as quoted in [http://www.granthomepage.com/intlongstreet.htm ''The New York Times''] (24 July 1885)

* It don't seem hardly right, John,&lt;br&gt;  When both my hands was full,&lt;br&gt;To stump me to a fight, John,&lt;br&gt;  Your cousin, too, John Bull!&lt;br&gt;      Ole Uncle S. sez he, &quot;I guess
** We know it now,&quot; sez he,&lt;br&gt;      &quot;The lion's paw is all the law,&lt;br&gt;* According to J. B.,&lt;br&gt;* That's fit for you an' me.&quot;
** [[James Russell Lowell]], ''The Biglow Papers'' (1848), Jonathan to John, Stanza 1.

* '''''Get up, stand up: stand up for your [[rights]]! &lt;br&gt; Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!'''''
** [[Bob Marley]] and {{w|Peter Tosh}}, ''{{w|Get Up, Stand Up}}, [[w:Burnin' (The Wailers album)|Burnin']]'' (1973)

* '''Truth is the light &lt;br /&gt; So you never give up the fight.'''
** [[Bob Marley]], final jamming of ''[[w:Live at the Roxy (Bob Marley &amp; The Wailers album)|Live at the Roxy]]'' (recorded 1976)

* Now deeper roll the maddening drums,&lt;br&gt;  And the mingling host like ocean heaves:&lt;br&gt;While from the midst, a horrid wailing comes,&lt;br&gt;  And high above the fight the lonely bugle grieves.
** Granville Mellen—The Lonely Bugle Grieves. Ode on the Celebration of Battle of Bunker Hill. June 17, 1825. (Mellen is called the &quot;Singer of one Song&quot; from this Ode).

* A man that runs away may fight again.
** Menander, after the battle of Chæronea. 338 B.C. In Didot—Bib. Græca, p. 91. Fragment appended to Aristophanes.

* There is a time for all things, a time to preach and a time to pray, but those times have passed away. There is a time to fight, and that time has now come.
** [[Peter Muhlenberg]]. The precise text of this Lutheran clergyman's sermon in Woodstock, Virginia, in January 1776, does not exist. The quotation above is from Edward W. Hocker, ''The Fighting Parson of the American Revolution'' (1936), p. 61.

* For bragging time was over and fighting time was come.
** [[Henry Newbolt]], ''Hawke''. Quotes reported in ''[[Wikisource:Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations (1922)|Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations]]'' (1922), p. 841-60.

* One doesn't fight only when one is optimistic. One fights because it is the right thing to do.
** [[Dennis Prager]], [http://www.nationalreview.com/article/434850/dark-time-america &quot;A Dark Time in America&quot;] (3 May 2016), ''National Review''

* O you who believe, when you meet those who disbelieve marching for war, turn not your backs to them. And whoso turns his back to them on that day unless manoeuvring for battle or turning to join a company -- he, indeed, incurs God's wrath and his refuge is [[Hell]]. And an evil destination it is. Because you slew them not, but God didst slay them, and thou smotest not when thou didst smite (the enemy), but God didst smite (him), and that He might confer upon the believers a benefit from Himself. Surely God who heareth and knoweth (all things). This -- and (know) that God will weaken the struggle of the disbelievers. 
** [[Quran]] 8:15-18

* '''Every struggle is like mud - there are always some lotus seeds waiting to sprout.'''
** [[Amit Ray]] ''Nonviolence: The Transforming Power&quot; (2012)

* He that fights and runs away,&lt;br&gt;May turn and fight another day;&lt;br&gt;But he that is in battle slain,&lt;br&gt;Will never rise to fight again.
** [[James Ray]], ''A Complete History of the Rebellion in 1745'', p. 48. (1752).

* Brother Jonathan sat by the kitchen fire,&lt;br&gt;Nursin' his foot on his knee.&lt;br&gt;&quot;It's a turrible fight they're havin' out there,&lt;br&gt;But they can't git over to me.&quot;&lt;br&gt;And Jonathan jingled the coins in his han'&lt;br&gt;An' thanked the good God for the sea.
** [[Charles Alex Richmond]], ''Brother Jonathan''.

* Aggressive fighting for the right is the noblest sport the world affords.
** [[Theodore Roosevelt]], saying. Gifford Pinchot, &quot;Roosevelt as President&quot; in ''State Papers as Governor and President, 1899–1909'' (vol. 15 of The Works of Theodore Roosevelt, national ed.), p. xxxiii (1926). Pinchot commented, &quot;There are few sayings of his that hold for me so much of him as this&quot;.

* The essence of combat is to strike at the [[vulnerabilities]] of one's opponent. There is no &quot;fair&quot; or &quot;unfair&quot;.
** [[w:Saitō Hajime (Rurouni Kenshin)|Saitō Hajime]], in ''[[Samurai X]]: [[W:Rurouni Kenshin: Trust &amp; Betrayal|Trust &amp; Betrayal]]'' (1999), written by Masashi Sogo.

* So struggle!&lt;br&gt;For struggle is life's flower;&lt;br&gt;The fertile flower of life.
** [[Ōsugi Sakae]], ''[https://www.marxists.org/subject/japan/osugi/1913/barren-flowers.htm Barren Flowers]'', Originally published in Kindai shisō (Modern Thought), Vol. 1, No. 11, August 1913. Translated by Michael Schauerte

* How are the mighty fallen in the midst of battle!
** ''[[Tanakh]]'', ''{{w|Books of Samuel}}'', II Samuel, I, 25.

* ''Sed omissis quidem divinis exhortationibus illum magis Græcum versiculum secularis sententiæ sibi adhibent, &quot;Qui fugiebat, rursus prœliabitur:&quot; ut et rursus forsitan fugiat.''
** But overlooking the divine exhortations, they act rather upon that Greek verse of worldly significance, &quot;He who flees will fight again,&quot; and that perhaps to betake himself again to flight.
** [[Tertullian]], ''De Fuga in Persecutione'', Chapter 10.

* If there is no intense ''struggle'' today, there will be no meaningful results tomorrow.
** [[Kwame Ture]] and [[Charles V. Hamilton]], {{cite book |title={{w|Black Power: The Politics of Liberation in America}} |date=1967 |publisher=Vintage Books |isbn=978-0-394-70033-5 |page=54}}

* History is the unbroken march of struggle to advance humanity. Thus all struggles are connected, some more strongly than others.
** [[Kwame Ture]], {{cite book |title=[[w:Black Power: The Politics of Liberation|Black Power: Politics of Liberation in America]] |date=10 November 1992 |publisher=Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group |isbn=978-0-679-74313-2 |page=195}} Afterword

* '''There are plenty of [[good]] reasons for fighting … but no good reason ever to [[hate]] without reservation.'''
** [[Kurt Vonnegut]], in ''{{w|Mother Night}}'' (1961).

===''Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations''===
:&lt;small&gt;Quotes reported in ''[[Wikisource:Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations (1922)|Hoyt's New Cyclopedia Of Practical Quotations]]'' (1922), p. 841-60.&lt;/small&gt;

*Fighting men are the city’s fortress.
**[[Alcaeus of Mytilene]], ''Fragment'', XXII.

*For those that fly may fight again,&lt;br&gt;Which he can never do that’s slain.
**[[Samuel Butler|Butler Samuel]], ''Hudibras'', Pt. III, Canto III, l. 243-44.

*For bragging time was over and fighting time was come.
**[[Henry Newbolt|Newbolt Henry]], ''Hawke'', l. 7, in: ''Collected Poems 1897-1907'' (1910).

* When your mother and father are having a fight, do you want them to kill each other? Or do you just want them to stop fighting?
** [[w:Jeanne Wakatsuki Houston|Jeanne Wakatsuki Houston]], ''[[w:Farewell to Manzanar|Farewell to Manzanar]]''.

* We are not ready to fight because we love fighting. We are ready to fight because we are worth fighting for.
** [[Zoé Samudzi]], as quoted in {{cite web |last1=Gagliano |first1=Siena |last2=Saad |first2=Syeda Khaula |title=34 Quotes That'll Inspire You On Juneteenth &amp; Beyond |url=https://www.bustle.com/p/21-juneteenth-quotes-thatll-inspire-you-to-keep-fighting-for-racial-justice-22985286 |website=Bustle |date=15 June 2022}}

* ''Celuy qui fuit de bonne heure&lt;br&gt;Peut combattre derechef.''
** He who flies at the right time can fight again.
** Satyre Menippée. (1594)

* It's easy to fight when everything's right&lt;br&gt;  And you're mad with the thrill and the glory;&lt;br&gt;It's easy to cheer when victory's near,&lt;br&gt;  And wallow in fields that are gory.&lt;br&gt;It's a different song when everything's wrong,&lt;br&gt;  When you're feeling infernally mortal;&lt;br&gt;When it's ten against one, and hope there is none,&lt;br&gt;  Buck up, little soldier, and chortle!
** [[Robert W. Service]], ''Carry On''.

*He which hath no stomach to this fight,&lt;br&gt;Let him depart; his passport shall be made.
**[[William Shakespeare|Shakespeare William]], ''Henry V'', Act IV, Sc. 3, l. 35.

* Fight the good fight of faith.
** I Timothy, VI. 12.

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia|Combat}}
{{Wiktionary|fighting}}

[[Category:Themes]]</text>
      <sha1>l2j89s2ncb6kiva2ptbb7xbm4mxhfuh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Up in Smoke</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>152335</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964945</id>
      <parentid>3635326</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:10:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964945</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="13169" sha1="hjd1ptimvz9lerpvne54rjtcfwxyuyc" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Up in Smoke|Up in Smoke]]''''' is a 1978 American comedy film directed by [[w:Lou Adler|Lou Adler]], and is [[Cheech &amp; Chong]]'s first feature-length film, released by [[w:Paramount Pictures|Paramount Pictures]].
Cheech &amp; Chong had been a comedy team for about ten years before they started reworking some of their material for their first film. Much of the film was shot in [[w:Los Angeles, California|Los Angeles, California]], including scenes set in [[w:Tijuana|Tijuana]], [[w:Mexico|Mexico]]. Scenes set on the Mexican border were actually filmed at the border in [[w:Yuma, Arizona|Yuma, Arizona]].
{{center|'''It will make you feel VERY funny!'''&lt;small&gt;([[#Taglines|taglines]])&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Dialogue==
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, am I driving okay?
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[looks around]'' I think we're parked, man.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man''': You wanna get high, man?
:'''Pedro''': Does Howdy Doody have wooden Balls, man?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
''[stoned cop walks up to the van, where Pedro and Man have been trying to switch who's driving]''
:'''Cop''': What do you guys want?
:'''Pedro''': Nothing.
:'''Cop''': Hey, do you mind if I have a, bite of your hot dog?
:'''Pedro''': Huh? No, man, here, take the whole thing. ''[the cop takes a huge bite]'' Want some fritos?
:'''Cop''': ''[through a mouthful of hot dog]'' No, this is fine! Thank you! Hey, you fellas have a nice day, okay?
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, man, what was that dude's trip? I mean, what was he on, man?
:'''Pedro''': Man, I don't know, but I wish we had some of it!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': Man, what is in this shit, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': Mostly Maui Waui, man.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah?
:'''Man Stoner''': But it's got some Labrador in it.
:'''Pedro''': What's Labrador?
:'''Man Stoner''': It's dog shit.
:'''Pedro''': What?
:'''Man Stoner''': Yeah, my dog ate my stash, man. I had it on the table and the little motherfucker ate it, man. 
:'''Pedro''': Yeah?
:'''Man Stoner''': So I had to follow him around with a little baggie for three days before I got it back. Really blew the dog's mind, ya know?
:'''Pedro''': You mean we're smokin' dog shit, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': Gets ya high, don't it?
''[song &quot;Rockin' Robin&quot; plays...]''
:'''Man Stoner''': I think it's even better than before, you know?
:'''Pedro''': Uhhh, I wonder what Great Dane tastes like, man.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Border Guard''': So, how long you've been in Mexico?
:'''Pedro''': A week. I mean a day.
:'''Border Guard''': Well, which is it? A week or a day?
:'''Pedro''': A weekday.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': Man, my legs hurt.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, I bet!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': Yeah, that 'Nam grass will fuck anyone up, man!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Strawberry''': Ahhh, look at that, man, the great outdoors, huh!
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, the great outdoors...
''[gives Strawberry a weird look]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': It's punk rock, Man! We can do that; we can be punks, Man!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
''[Man has disguised himself as a woman while hitchhiking]''
:'''Man Stoner''': Yeah, I know, but listen. I slept in a ditch last night, man, I almost froze my balls off, man.
:'''Pedro de Pacas''': Hey, I didn't think you had any, man. I wouldn't even have stopped.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': ''[laughing while stoned]'' Way anchor! How much does it weigh? I don't know, I forgot! Pffhhh! Ha-ha, I saw that in a movie once...!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arresting Officer''': Sir, could I please see your license?
:'''Pedro''': Whuut?
:'''Arresting Officer''': Your license. Where's your license?
:'''Pedro''': My license? It's on the bumper, man, back there, man!
:'''Arresting Officer''': No, I mean your DRIVER'S license.
:'''Pedro''': Oh. Oh, yeah, I got my driver's license, man... ''[gets the license with great difficulty]'' Hey, I thought'a somethin' really funny, man... Your mother! ''[laughs]''
:'''Arresting Officer''': ''[after dirty look, of course]'' Sir, what's your name?
:'''Pedro''': Uuhhh... Isn't it on the license, man? Yeah, that's it! Pedro De Pacas, man, that's my name...

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arresting Officer''': ''[to Man]'' And what is your name, sir?
:'''Pedro''': Whut? I told you my name, man!
:'''Arresting Officer''': ''[to Man]'' Sir... what's YOUR name?
:'''Pedro''': ''[to Man]'' Hey, man! The dude wants to know your name, man!
''[Man vomits onto the floor of the car]''
:'''Pedro''': Uuhhh - His name is RAALLLPH, man!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[to Pedro, who is in the throes of panic]'' HEY! MELLOW OUT, MAN!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': Don't worry, man. Those aren't narcs, they're Las Emigras; you know, the Immigration Service looking for illegal aliens.
:'''Man Stoner''': What's the Immigration Service doing here, man?
:'''Pedro''': My cousin needed a ride to his brother's wedding in Tijuana; so he called the Emigras, man. They'll deport the entire wedding party, man. They get a free bus ride across the border and lunch. When the wedding is over, man, they'll just come back across the border.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
''[after picking up Man, Pedro guns his car and takes off down the street]''
:'''Man Stoner''': Ohhh! Ohhh!
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, how far you goin', man?
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[points to the curb]'' Oh, right here would be fine, man!
:'''Pedro''': Oh, you ain't scared of a little speed, are ya, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': Wha, you got some speed, man?
:'''Pedro''': Huh? Oh. Speed? Uh, no, I ain't got no speed, man. But you know what I do got, though, man? I got a joint, man!
:'''Man Stoner''': Oh, wow. Alright.
:'''Pedro''': ''[gets it out and hands it to Man]'' Here, light that thing up, man, let's get Chinese-eyed, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[eyeing the joint]'' What kind of joint is this, man?
:'''Pedro''': Oh, it's a heavy duty joint, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': Looks like a toothpick, man.
:'''Pedro''': Naw, it's not a toothpick, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, it IS a toothpick, man.
''[hands it back to Pedro]''
:'''Pedro''': Aw, man, it's... ''[looking at it, puzzled]'' it IS a toothpick! I must got it in another pocket, man. Hold on, I got the shit right here, man. ''[feels around in his pocket]'' Oh, that's my dick. ''[feels around some more]'' Yeah, there we go. Hey, there you go, man. ''[hands a skinny, curled up joint to Man]'' Light that sucker up, man. And go to the moon.
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[looking at a dinky little joint]'' Jeez, I hope your dick's bigger than this, man.
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, you wanna get out and walk, man?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, hey, don't take those, man.
:'''Pedro''': Wha...?
:'''Man Stoner''': I almost gave you the wrong shit, man.
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, I already took 'em, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[laughing in astonishment]'' Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo...
:'''Pedro''': Hey, whaddaya mean &quot;ho ho ho ho ho&quot;?
:'''Man Stoner''': Oh... HU-WOW, MAN!
:'''Pedro''': Hey, what was that shit, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': You just take the most acid I've ever seen anybody eat in my life!
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, I never had no acid before, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': Jeez, I hope you're not busy for about a month...
:'''Pedro''': Hey, I've seen those guys walking around my neighborhood that took too much acid, man. The one guy, his head's swelled up like a pumpkin...
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[referring to the acid Pedro took]'' No, that's good acid, man.
:'''Pedro''': Another time, there was this guy...

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[Pedro starts toking on the giant joint]'' Toke, toke it up, man! ''[Pedro starts choking]'' Kinda grabs ya' by the boo-boo, don't it?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': No, hey, man, if we're gonna wear uniforms, man, you know let's have everybody wear something different.
:'''Pedro''': Yea, that's it. Yea, we want something where everybody wears something different, man, but the same, you know?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Curtis''': This shit is so bad, it'll put a hump on a camel's back.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arnold Stoner''': Dear God, almighty me... I think he's the Antichrist.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[discovered, roach on an ashtray]'' El roacho.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ''[to wife, off camera]'' Sweetheart, I'll talk to him. ''[to Anthony &quot;Man&quot;, as he makes a fruit smoothie]'' Son, your mother and me would like for you to cozy up to the Finkelstein boy. He's a bright kid, and, uh... he's going to military school, and... remember, he was an Eagle Scout...
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': Arnold...
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ''[shouting as his wife continues]'' Will you shut up? We're going to have a family brawl!
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': ...and a retard!
:'''Arnold Stoner''': We've put up with a hell of a lot. ''[Anthony starts blender]'' Can this wait? Build your goddamn muscles, huh? You know, you could build your muscles picking strawberries. You know, bend and scoop... like the Mexicans. ''[Anthony turns off blender and pours contents into tall glass]'' Shit, maybe I could get you a job with United Fruit! I got a buddy with United Fruit. Get you started. Start with strawberries, you might work your way up to these goddamn bananas! ''[Anthony drinks from glass as his father shouts]'' When, boy? When... are you going to get your act together?
''[Anthony turns to him and gives a loud belch]''
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': ''[in disgust]'' Gross!
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ''[rubs his forehead with his hand]'' Oh, good God Almighty me. I think he's the Antichrist. ''[turns to his son]'' Anthony, I want to talk to you. Now, listen! ''[Anthony walks away and gives an obscene gesture behind his back]'' Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you! You get a goddamn job before sundown...
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': ''[pointing to Anthony as he walks away]'' Is that some kind of peace sign?
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ...or we're shipping you off to military school with that... goddamn Finkelstein... shit kid! ''[turns away in frustration]'' Son of a BITCH!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Toyota Kawasaki''': Sgt. Stedenko, what are you exactly looking for?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Dope, drugs, weed, grass, toot, smack, quackers, uppers, downers, all arounders. You name it, we want it!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[on police radio]'' Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, can you hear me?
:'''Clyde - Narc''': Hello, headquarters? Hello, headquarters? Come in, headquarters. This is Officer Clive... we are...
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Use the codename! The codename!
:'''Clyde - Narc''': Headquarters, headquarters come in, please. This is Codename Hardhead.
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hat! Hardhat! Give me that! Hello, radio dispatch? This is Codename Hardhat, Codename Hardhat, do you read me? Over.
:'''Man Stoner''': Was that Lardass?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hardhat! Codename Hardhat! Do you read, radio dispatch?
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, I got somethin' for ya, Lardass!
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hardhat! Hard... Hat! Do you understand?
:'''Pedro''': Lardass, Lardass!
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hardhat! Radio dispatch, do you know who this is?
:'''Pedro''': Naw, who is this is?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': This is Sergeant Stedenko!
:'''Pedro''': Oh yeah, you know who this is?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': No! 
:'''Pedro''': Bye-bye, Lardass!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': I been smoking since I was born, man, I can smoke anything, man. You know like I smoke that Michoacán, and Acapulco Gold, man. I even smoke that tied stick, you know?
:'''Man Stoner''': &quot;Tied stick?&quot;
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, you know that stuff that's tied to a stick.
:'''Man Stoner''': Ohh, THAI stick.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Toyota Kawasaki''': This is Toyota Kawasaki here at the Mexican-United States border.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': The only kind of meat a priest could eat on Friday was nun.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Now just how well do you know that freak with the basketball?
:'''Unknown''': Which basketball?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Which basketball?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Some asshole pissed on my leg!

== Taglines ==
*It will make you feel VERY funny!
*Don't miss the only film where the heroes get wiped out in the first five minutes!
*You'll be rolling in the aisles!
*DON'T go straight to see this film!

==Cast==
* [[w:Cheech Marin|Cheech Marin]] - Pedro De Pacas
* [[w:Tommy Chong|Tommy Chong]] - Anthony &quot;Man&quot; Stoner
* [[w:Strother Martin|Strother Martin]] - Arnold Stoner
* [[w:Edie Adams|Edie Adams]] - Tempest Stoner
* [[w:Stacy Keach|Stacy Keach]] - Sergeant Stedenko
* [[w:Tom Skerritt|Tom Skerritt]] - Strawberry
* [[w:David Nelson (actor)|David Nelson]] - a Roxy Theatre doorman
* Kurt Kaufman - a Roxy Theatre doorman
* [[w:Rodney Bingenheimer|Rodney Bingenheimer]] - Himself
* [[w:Ellen Barkin|Ellen Barkin]] (''uncredited'') - Guitar-playing woman

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0078446}}

[[Category:1978 films]]
[[Category:1978 American films]]
[[Category:1970s American films]]
[[Category:Cheech &amp; Chong series]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Stoner films]]
[[Category:Films set in California]]
[[Category:Films set in Mexico]]
[[Category:Censored films]]
[[Category:United States National Film Registry films]]</text>
      <sha1>hjd1ptimvz9lerpvne54rjtcfwxyuyc</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964946</id>
      <parentid>3964945</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:11:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964946</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="13210" sha1="3k38z7fc8bieea1pfwgqsyaizwamimd" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Up in Smoke|Up in Smoke]]''''' is a 1978 American comedy film directed by [[w:Lou Adler|Lou Adler]], and is [[Cheech &amp; Chong]]'s first feature-length film, released by [[w:Paramount Pictures|Paramount Pictures]].
Cheech &amp; Chong had been a comedy team for about ten years before they started reworking some of their material for their first film. Much of the film was shot in [[w:Los Angeles, California|Los Angeles, California]], including scenes set in [[w:Tijuana|Tijuana]], [[w:Mexico|Mexico]]. Scenes set on the Mexican border were actually filmed at the border in [[w:Yuma, Arizona|Yuma, Arizona]].
{{center|'''It will make you feel VERY funny!'''&lt;small&gt;([[#Taglines|taglines]])&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Dialogue==
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, am I driving okay?
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[looks around]'' I think we're parked, man.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man''': You wanna get high, man?
:'''Pedro''': Does Howdy Doody have wooden Balls, man?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
''[stoned cop walks up to the van, where Pedro and Man have been trying to switch who's driving]''
:'''Cop''': What do you guys want?
:'''Pedro''': Nothing.
:'''Cop''': Hey, do you mind if I have a, bite of your hot dog?
:'''Pedro''': Huh? No, man, here, take the whole thing. ''[the cop takes a huge bite]'' Want some fritos?
:'''Cop''': ''[through a mouthful of hot dog]'' No, this is fine! Thank you! Hey, you fellas have a nice day, okay?
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, man, what was that dude's trip? I mean, what was he on, man?
:'''Pedro''': Man, I don't know, but I wish we had some of it!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': Man, what is in this shit, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': Mostly Maui Waui, man.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah?
:'''Man Stoner''': But it's got some Labrador in it.
:'''Pedro''': What's Labrador?
:'''Man Stoner''': It's dog shit.
:'''Pedro''': What?
:'''Man Stoner''': Yeah, my dog ate my stash, man. I had it on the table and the little motherfucker ate it, man. 
:'''Pedro''': Yeah?
:'''Man Stoner''': So I had to follow him around with a little baggie for three days before I got it back. Really blew the dog's mind, ya know?
:'''Pedro''': You mean we're smokin' dog shit, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': Gets ya high, don't it?
''[song &quot;Rockin' Robin&quot; plays...]''
:'''Man Stoner''': I think it's even better than before, you know?
:'''Pedro''': Uhhh, I wonder what Great Dane tastes like, man.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Border Guard''': So, how long you've been in Mexico?
:'''Pedro''': A week. I mean a day.
:'''Border Guard''': Well, which is it? A week or a day?
:'''Pedro''': A weekday.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': Man, my legs hurt.
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, I bet!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': Yeah, that 'Nam grass will fuck anyone up, man!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Strawberry''': Ahhh, look at that, man, the great outdoors, huh!
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, the great outdoors...
''[gives Strawberry a weird look]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': It's punk rock, Man! We can do that; we can be punks, Man!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
''[Man has disguised himself as a woman while hitchhiking]''
:'''Man Stoner''': Yeah, I know, but listen. I slept in a ditch last night, man, I almost froze my balls off, man.
:'''Pedro de Pacas''': Hey, I didn't think you had any, man. I wouldn't even have stopped.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': ''[laughing while stoned]'' Way anchor! How much does it weigh? I don't know, I forgot! Pffhhh! Ha-ha, I saw that in a movie once...!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arresting Officer''': Sir, could I please see your license?
:'''Pedro''': Whuut?
:'''Arresting Officer''': Your license. Where's your license?
:'''Pedro''': My license? It's on the bumper, man, back there, man!
:'''Arresting Officer''': No, I mean your DRIVER'S license.
:'''Pedro''': Oh. Oh, yeah, I got my driver's license, man... ''[gets the license with great difficulty]'' Hey, I thought'a somethin' really funny, man... Your mother! ''[laughs]''
:'''Arresting Officer''': ''[after dirty look, of course]'' Sir, what's your name?
:'''Pedro''': Uuhhh... Isn't it on the license, man? Yeah, that's it! Pedro De Pacas, man, that's my name...

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arresting Officer''': ''[to Man]'' And what is your name, sir?
:'''Pedro''': Whut? I told you my name, man!
:'''Arresting Officer''': ''[to Man]'' Sir... what's YOUR name?
:'''Pedro''': ''[to Man]'' Hey, man! The dude wants to know your name, man!
''[Man vomits onto the floor of the car]''
:'''Pedro''': Uuhhh - His name is RAALLLPH, man!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[to Pedro, who is in the throes of panic]'' HEY! MELLOW OUT, MAN!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': Don't worry, man. Those aren't narcs, they're Las Emigras; you know, the Immigration Service looking for illegal aliens.
:'''Man Stoner''': What's the Immigration Service doing here, man?
:'''Pedro''': My cousin needed a ride to his brother's wedding in Tijuana; so he called the Emigras, man. They'll deport the entire wedding party, man. They get a free bus ride across the border and lunch. When the wedding is over, man, they'll just come back across the border.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
''[after picking up Man, Pedro guns his car and takes off down the street]''
:'''Man Stoner''': Ohhh! Ohhh!
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, how far you goin', man?
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[points to the curb]'' Oh, right here would be fine, man!
:'''Pedro''': Oh, you ain't scared of a little speed, are ya, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': Wha, you got some speed, man?
:'''Pedro''': Huh? Oh. Speed? Uh, no, I ain't got no speed, man. But you know what I do got, though, man? I got a joint, man!
:'''Man Stoner''': Oh, wow. Alright.
:'''Pedro''': ''[gets it out and hands it to Man]'' Here, light that thing up, man, let's get Chinese-eyed, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[eyeing the joint]'' What kind of joint is this, man?
:'''Pedro''': Oh, it's a heavy duty joint, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': Looks like a toothpick, man.
:'''Pedro''': Naw, it's not a toothpick, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, it IS a toothpick, man.
''[hands it back to Pedro]''
:'''Pedro''': Aw, man, it's... ''[looking at it, puzzled]'' it IS a toothpick! I must got it in another pocket, man. Hold on, I got the shit right here, man. ''[feels around in his pocket]'' Oh, that's my dick. ''[feels around some more]'' Yeah, there we go. Hey, there you go, man. ''[hands a skinny, curled up joint to Man]'' Light that sucker up, man. And go to the moon.
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[looking at a dinky little joint]'' Jeez, I hope your dick's bigger than this, man.
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, you wanna get out and walk, man?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, hey, don't take those, man.
:'''Pedro''': Wha...?
:'''Man Stoner''': I almost gave you the wrong shit, man.
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, I already took 'em, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[laughing in astonishment]'' Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo...
:'''Pedro''': Hey, whaddaya mean &quot;ho ho ho ho ho&quot;?
:'''Man Stoner''': Oh... HU-WOW, MAN!
:'''Pedro''': Hey, what was that shit, man?
:'''Man Stoner''': You just take the most acid I've ever seen anybody eat in my life!
:'''Pedro''': Hey, man, I never had no acid before, man.
:'''Man Stoner''': Jeez, I hope you're not busy for about a month...
:'''Pedro''': Hey, I've seen those guys walking around my neighborhood that took too much acid, man. The one guy, his head's swelled up like a pumpkin...
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[referring to the acid Pedro took]'' No, that's good acid, man.
:'''Pedro''': Another time, there was this guy...

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[Pedro starts toking on the giant joint]'' Toke, toke it up, man! ''[Pedro starts choking]'' Kinda grabs ya' by the boo-boo, don't it?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': No, hey, man, if we're gonna wear uniforms, man, you know let's have everybody wear something different.
:'''Pedro''': Yea, that's it. Yea, we want something where everybody wears something different, man, but the same, you know?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Curtis''': This shit is so bad, it'll put a hump on a camel's back.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arnold Stoner''': Dear God, almighty me... I think he's the Antichrist.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[discovered, roach on an ashtray]'' El roacho.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ''[to wife, off camera]'' Sweetheart, I'll talk to him. ''[to Anthony &quot;Man&quot;, as he makes a fruit smoothie]'' Son, your mother and me would like for you to cozy up to the Finkelstein boy. He's a bright kid, and, uh... he's going to military school, and... remember, he was an Eagle Scout...
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': Arnold...
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ''[shouting as his wife continues]'' Will you shut up? We're going to have a family brawl!
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': ...and a retard!
:'''Arnold Stoner''': We've put up with a hell of a lot. ''[Anthony starts blender]'' Can this wait? Build your goddamn muscles, huh? You know, you could build your muscles picking strawberries. You know, bend and scoop... like the Mexicans. ''[Anthony turns off blender and pours contents into tall glass]'' Shit, maybe I could get you a job with United Fruit! I got a buddy with United Fruit. Get you started. Start with strawberries, you might work your way up to these goddamn bananas! ''[Anthony drinks from glass as his father shouts]'' When, boy? When... are you going to get your act together?
''[Anthony turns to him and gives a loud belch]''
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': ''[in disgust]'' Gross!
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ''[rubs his forehead with his hand]'' Oh, good God Almighty me. I think he's the Antichrist. ''[turns to his son]'' Anthony, I want to talk to you. Now, listen! ''[Anthony walks away and gives an obscene gesture behind his back]'' Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you! You get a goddamn job before sundown...
:'''Mrs. Tempest Stoner''': ''[pointing to Anthony as he walks away]'' Is that some kind of peace sign?
:'''Arnold Stoner''': ...or we're shipping you off to military school with that... goddamn Finkelstein... shit kid! ''[turns away in frustration]'' Son of a BITCH!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Toyota Kawasaki''': Sgt. Stedenko, what are you exactly looking for?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Dope, drugs, weed, grass, toot, smack, quackers, uppers, downers, all arounders. You name it, we want it!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Man Stoner''': ''[on police radio]'' Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, can you hear me?
:'''Clyde - Narc''': Hello, headquarters? Hello, headquarters? Come in, headquarters. This is Officer Clive... we are...
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Use the codename! The codename!
:'''Clyde - Narc''': Headquarters, headquarters come in, please. This is Codename Hardhead.
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hat! Hardhat! Give me that! Hello, radio dispatch? This is Codename Hardhat, Codename Hardhat, do you read me? Over.
:'''Man Stoner''': Was that Lardass?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hardhat! Codename Hardhat! Do you read, radio dispatch?
:'''Man Stoner''': Hey, I got somethin' for ya, Lardass!
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hardhat! Hard... Hat! Do you understand?
:'''Pedro''': Lardass, Lardass!
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Hardhat! Radio dispatch, do you know who this is?
:'''Pedro''': Naw, who is this is?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': This is Sergeant Stedenko!
:'''Pedro''': Oh yeah, you know who this is?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': No! 
:'''Pedro''': Bye-bye, Lardass!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Pedro''': I been smoking since I was born, man, I can smoke anything, man. You know like I smoke that Michoacán, and Acapulco Gold, man. I even smoke that tied stick, you know?
:'''Man Stoner''': &quot;Tied stick?&quot;
:'''Pedro''': Yeah, you know that stuff that's tied to a stick.
:'''Man Stoner''': Ohh, THAI stick.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Toyota Kawasaki''': This is Toyota Kawasaki here at the Mexican-United States border.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': The only kind of meat a priest could eat on Friday was nun.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Now just how well do you know that freak with the basketball?
:'''Unknown''': Which basketball?
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Which basketball?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Sgt. Stedenko''': Some asshole pissed on my leg!

== Taglines ==
*It will make you feel VERY funny!
*Don't miss the only film where the heroes get wiped out in the first five minutes!
*You'll be rolling in the aisles!
*DON'T go straight to see this film!

==Cast==
* [[w:Cheech Marin|Cheech Marin]] - Pedro De Pacas
* [[w:Tommy Chong|Tommy Chong]] - Anthony &quot;Man&quot; Stoner
* [[w:Strother Martin|Strother Martin]] - Arnold Stoner
* [[w:Edie Adams|Edie Adams]] - Tempest Stoner
* [[w:Stacy Keach|Stacy Keach]] - Sergeant Stedenko
* [[w:Tom Skerritt|Tom Skerritt]] - Strawberry
* [[w:David Nelson (actor)|David Nelson]] - a Roxy Theatre doorman
* Kurt Kaufman - a Roxy Theatre doorman
* [[w:Rodney Bingenheimer|Rodney Bingenheimer]] - Himself
* [[w:Ellen Barkin|Ellen Barkin]] (''uncredited'') - Guitar-playing woman

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0078446}}

[[Category:1978 films]]
[[Category:1978 American films]]
[[Category:1970s American films]]
[[Category:Cheech &amp; Chong series]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Stoner films]]
[[Category:Films set in California]]
[[Category:Films set in Mexico]]
[[Category:Censored films]]
[[Category:United States National Film Registry films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Lou Adler]]</text>
      <sha1>3k38z7fc8bieea1pfwgqsyaizwamimd</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Gulliver's Travels (1939 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>152371</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965108</id>
      <parentid>3963601</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:37:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965108</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10652" sha1="6f18s4o2kju4mfyyf8nbiaiomuoxuxs" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Gulliver's Travels (1939 film)|Gulliver's Travels]]''''' is a 1939 American animated [[w:Technicolor|Technicolor]] feature film, the second [[w:traditional animation|cel-animated]] feature film to be released.
:''Directed by [[w:Dave Fleischer|Dave Fleischer]]. Produced by [[w:Max Fleischer|Max Fleischer]] for [[w:Fleischer Studios|Fleischer Studios]]. Loosely based on ''Gulliver's Travels'' by [[Jonathan Swift]].''

== Gabby ==
* ''[first lines]''&lt;br /&gt;All's well!&lt;br /&gt;What's a rainy day?&lt;br /&gt;Never mind that cloud,&lt;br /&gt;Behind that cloud you'll find a golden ray.&lt;br /&gt;All's well!&lt;br /&gt;Laugh your fears away.&lt;br /&gt;See the light ahead, right ahead.&lt;br /&gt;There's a moonlit night ahead.&lt;br /&gt;Everyone, come on have fun. All's well!
* ''[repeated line]'' There's a giant on the beach!
* ''[he and the guards have Prince David on the ground with their swords pointing at him, but are blown backwards and Gulliver's hand appears, rescues Prince David, and hides him]'' Where is he? Where did he go? ''[to Princess Glory]'' Concealing a spy - and at a time of war too. That makes it worse. ''[Princess Glory turns away from him; to the guards]'' Carry on with the search, men! ''[Gulliver picks Princess Glory up without Gabby noticing]'' Mind you, your father will hear this! ''[sees Princess Glory has disappeared]''
* ''[having read King Bombo's letter]'' Guards! Guards! Guards! Guards! Bombo's attacking! Bombo's attacking! It's war! Bombo's attacking! ''[Neighbor: &quot;What?!&quot;]'' Bombo's attacking! It's war! It's war! To the beach! To the beach!

== Glory ==
* Faithful, remember, that whatever I do,&lt;br /&gt;I'm always faithful, my love.&lt;br /&gt;Faithful, with all my soul and thankful for you,&lt;br /&gt;Who came from heaven above.&lt;br /&gt;We'll dance tonight together,&lt;br /&gt;On a world with me we'll find.&lt;br /&gt;So I'll be faithful and faithful as I,&lt;br /&gt;Promise to be, and you'll be mine, all mine.

== David ==
* Forever, forever,&lt;br /&gt;There won't be anyone but you.&lt;br /&gt;Remember I'm true, my sweet.&lt;br /&gt;Forever, forever,&lt;br /&gt;You'll share in everything I do,&lt;br /&gt;And keep smiling through, my sweet.&lt;br /&gt;I'll have just you here in my heart,&lt;br /&gt;And I'll trust you though we're apart.&lt;br /&gt;So, forever, forever,&lt;br /&gt;My guiding angel you will be,&lt;br /&gt;So always have faith in me.

== Gulliver ==
* Come now, don't let my size frighten you.
* ''[looking around the town square]'' Well, well. Where's everyone gone? ''[the people of Lilliput close their doors and windows]'' This is no way to treat a harmless visitor. ''[the people of Lilliput open their doors and windows again]''
* I hear a dream all day&lt;br /&gt;A dream that calls to me&lt;br /&gt;Come home again, you sailor man… sailor man…&lt;br /&gt;Home again to the sea.
* Two hearts and a wedding broken by a melody? Incredible! Hold on! I have an idea that might turn this malice into a melody! Sing &quot;Faithful&quot; and &quot;Forever&quot; together, as one song!
* Poor, poor, foolish little people. Look what you've done. Now go ahead, break your nutshell heads over your songs! But did you have to break Glory's heart, King Little? Because you were thoughtless and selfish...and you, Bombo! O mighty warrior...what have you won? You were too stubborn to think. Too busy quarreling to lend ear to the harmony that might have been yours. But now in your sorrow and despair, perhaps you'll listen to your songs as they might be sung.

== Dialogue ==
:''[First title card]''
:'''Scroll''': I, Lemuel Gulliver, give thee a most faithful history of my most interesting [[adventure]] in the South Sea. On the 5th day of November, 1699, having reached latitude 30 degrees - two minutes south - a storm of great fury suddenly...
:''[The rest cannot be seen]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''First Guard''': The king, has visitors!
:'''Second Guard''': Don't you know they're signing a wedding contract?
:'''Gabby''': There's a giant on the beach! ''[the first guard slams the lantern door on him; he mumbles:]'' Whoop! Whoa! There's a giant on the beach!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''King Little''': ''[signs his name; hands the quill to Bombo]'' Your Majesty...
:'''King Bombo''': ''[takes the quill]'' Thank you, Your Majesty. ''[reads]'' &quot;Marriage contract. King Little of Lilliput betroths his daughter, Princess Glory, ''[Glory walks towards David, hand in hand]'' to Prince David, son of Bombo, King of Blefescu&quot;! Quite in order. Write: &quot;King Bombo&quot;. ''[signs his name]''. 
:'''King Bombo''': Well, that's it, you little rascal, you! We did it!
:'''King Little''': Yes!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''King Little''': ''[sniffs; wipes his tears]'' My only little daughter. I dread losing her.
:'''King Bombo''': Huh, buck up there old boy, you're not losing a daughter. You're gaining a son... ''[tearfully]'' My son, David! ''[takes the handkerchief from Little, blows his nose with a honk, and gives it back to him]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''King Little''': That's &quot;Faithful&quot;, the [[song]] of Lilliput. It will be played at the wedding tomorrow.
:'''King Bombo''': What's that? &quot;Faithful&quot;?! Oh, no, no! &quot;Forever&quot;, the song of Blefescu, must be played at the wedding!
:'''King Little''': But Bombo! &quot;Faithful&quot; is always played at ''our'' weddings! It's [[tradition]], sir! And it's very pretty!
:'''King Bombo''': Ah, yes; a pleasant little ditty, but hardly appropriate for this great occasion! But &quot;Forever&quot;! There's a song for you! Ho-ho!
:'''King Little''': Humph. &quot;Faithful&quot; will be played. 
:'''King Bombo''': Bonno [sic]. Absolute bonno! It must be &quot;Forever&quot;.
:'''King Little''': &quot;Faithful&quot;.
:'''King Bombo''': &quot;Forever&quot;.
:'''King Little''': &quot;Faithful&quot;.
:'''King Bombo''': &quot;Forever&quot;.
:'''King Little''': &quot;Faithful&quot;.
:'''King Bombo''': It will be &quot;Forever&quot;, or there will be no wedding!
:'''King Little''': No wedding?! But the cake and the pretty [[flowers]]… O, Bombo, you'll love &quot;Faithful&quot;. ''[hums; tries to dance with Bombo; Bombo disentangles himself]''
:'''King Bombo''': It's [[war]]! ''[smashes the cake; storms out; turns; hesitates; Gabby rushes past him; the guards seize Bombo instead; he fights them off]'' It's war! 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''King Little''': [[War]]. Hah-hah! Rolls off my back like a duck.
:'''Gabby''': But I'm tryin' to tell ya!
:'''King Little''': Speak up!
:'''Gabby''': There's a - There's a- 
:'''King Little''': What's on your [[mind]]?
:'''Gabby''': ''[smacks face; turns red]'' I said...
:'''King Little''': Speak up, man.
:'''Gabby''': I said... There's a giant on the beach! There's a giant on the beach!
:'''King Little''': For [[heaven]]'s sake, Gabby! Button your mouth! Now, be off with you! Shoo-shoo-shoo-shoo! Can't you see I have a war on my hands?! 
:'''Gabby''': A war?! Do you suppose he could be a - a spy?
:'''King Little''': ''[mumbling]'' Or they oughta be more patient I should think… ''[startled]'' Who's a spy?! Who's a spy?!
:'''Gabby''': '''''THE GIANT ON THE BEACH!''''' ''[turns blue in the face]'' 
:'''King Little''': ''[from behind his throne]'' Giant? Giant?! Why don't you tell me these things?! Well, do something about it! Don't stand there! Go! Sic the dogs on him! Fetch him to me at once!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Gabby''': Your Majesty! I've got the giant.
:'''King Little''': The giant? Oh, yes, the giant. Well, bring him in, bring him in!
:'''Gabby''': Okay, okay. ''[beat]'' Your Majesty, I don't believe he'd fit in here!
:'''King Little''': Oh, you don't, hmn? So, it's not good enough for him, hmn? Now, where is he?
:'''Gabby''': Out there, your Majesty!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Gulliver''': Well! What have we here? A man. A tiny man. Hold on there, mate! Nobody's going to hurt you. 
:'''Gabby''': Help! Let me down! ''[bursts into tears]''
:'''King Little''': Drop that! Drop that!
:'''Gulliver''': Well! Another one! Who're you?
:'''King Little''': Who, me? Why, I'm King around here! Guards! Guards! To the turrets! Take aim at the giant! Surround the giant! Guards!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Gulliver''': Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Gulliver, your Majesty; Lemuel Gulliver. A shipwrecked sailor. ''[salutes]'' At your service!
:'''King Little''': ''[salutes]'' Ah! Welcome to Lilliput, Mr. Gulliver. ''[beat]''. Mr. Gulliver, can you fight?
:'''Gulliver''': Well, your Majesty, I can make anyone on my side. 
:'''King Little''': Ah, splendid, splendid! I don't think Bombo's going to give us any sort of trouble while you're around here; no sir! ''[aside]'' He's on our side, Gabby. ''[addresses the crowd]'' He's on our side! There's no need to fear! The Man-Mountain's on our side!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Gabby''': Ahoy, mate! Ahoy, ahoy! I'm a regular sailor-boy! I owned a boat, a beauty too, just as big as… just as big as… as big as your shoe!
:'''Gulliver''': My, my.
:'''Gabby''': Aye, aye.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Sneak''': Now, he's a dead duck!
:''[They send a letter to King Bombo]''.
:'''King Bombo''': [''reads''] &quot;The giant will be a dead duck&quot;. Hah! Now we are getting at somewhere! [''writes''] &quot;Dear Spies: destroy, crush, obliterate, annihilate! Kill him. I will attack at dawn! Make everything ready for that. –Bombo&quot;. 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''King Little''': To defend Lilliput!
:'''Soldiers''': To defend Lilliput!
:'''King Little''': Yes; forward march! 
:'''Soldiers''': ''[singing]'' All together now; all together now…

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Princess Glory''': David, look! Gulliver's Thunder Machine.
:''[Sneak, Snoop, and Snitch are trying to kill Gulliver with his own pistol]''
:'''Prince David''': Wait here, Glory. ''[jumps on his horse and rides off to stop them]''
:'''Princess Glory''': David!
:'''Sneak''': Now pull! Pull!

==Cast==
* [[w:Sam Parker|Sam Parker]] as Lemuel Gulliver
* [[w:Pinto Colvig|Pinto Colvig]] as [[Gabby]]
* [[w:Jack Mercer|Jack Mercer]] as King Little
* [[w:Fred Shields|Fred Shields]] as King Bombo
* [[w:Jessica Dragonette|Jessica Dragonette]] as Princess Glory
* [[w:Lanny Ross|Lanny Ross]] as Prince David
* ? as Sneak
* ? as Snoop
* ? as Snitch
* ? as Twinkletoes

==See also==
* ''[[Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937 film)|Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs]]'' ([[w:Walt Disney Productions|Walt Disney Productions]], 1937) – the first American animated feature film
* ''[[The Adventures of Prince Achmed]]'' (Germany, 1926) – the first animated feature film

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0031397|title=Gulliver's Travels}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Gulliver's Travels (1939 film)}}
[[Category:1939 animated films]]
[[Category:1939 American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on novels]]
[[Category:Films directed by Dave Fleischer]]</text>
      <sha1>6f18s4o2kju4mfyyf8nbiaiomuoxuxs</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Cheech &amp; Chong's Next Movie</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>152890</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964949</id>
      <parentid>3585651</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:14:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964949</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6549" sha1="nl9mcqyop15rcrhurinffzcj6qbzz9x" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Cheech &amp; Chong's Next Movie|Cheech &amp; Chong's Next Movie]]''''' is the second feature-length film by [[Cheech &amp; Chong]], released in 1980 by [[w:Universal Pictures|Universal Pictures]], and directed by [[w:Tommy Chong|Tommy Chong]].

==Cheech==
* Responsibility is a heavy responsibility!
* ''[singing]'' Mexican Americans / love education / so they go to night school / and take Spanish / and get a B.
* ''[to a girl on the phone]'' You wanna come over to my place? Okay, I'll be here with balls on.
* Somebody ripped off the thing I ripped off!
* Holy sheep shit! It's guitar heaven!
* Man, if you had a second brain, it would die of loneliness, man.
* ''[waiting on date to arrive]'' Man, hurry up, bitch. I got lots of shit to do. Shit. If that bitch doesn't hurry up and get here, I'll have to wait some more.
* Shit, man. I'm gonna be late for work again. That's the fifth time this week, and it's only Tuesday, man.
* Hey, that's a pretty nice car, man. Better get it back to the circus before they find out it's gone.

==Dialogue==
:'''Cheech''': Hey, it's about time, man. ''[seeing a jar with a yellowish fluid inside]'' Hey, what do you got? Hey, give me some.
:'''Chong''': What?
:'''Cheech''': Give a drink, man. Come on, man, you drink it.
:'''Chong''': What, this?
:'''Cheech''': Yeah.
:'''Chong''': Oh, go ahead, man. Help yourself. ''[hands him the jar]''
:'''Cheech''': Wait a minute... ''[sniffs the inside]'' Hey, man, that's pee!
:'''Chong''': No kidding.
:'''Cheech''': What are you doing with pee?
:'''Chong''': That's for my probation officer, man.
:'''Cheech''': What, does he drink pee?
:'''Chong''': No, man. Last week, I was supposed to bring some in, you know. 
:'''Cheech''': Yeah?
:'''Chong''': But I forgot to wash out the jar first, so he sees that mayonnaise floatin' around, and he'll think I'm on some kind of weird drug again, and I'm really gonna fuck with his mind this time, man.
:'''Cheech''': Yeah, what did you do?
:'''Chong''': Have my SISTER pee in it.
:'''Cheech''': ''[laughs it out]'' Your sister?
:'''Chong''': Yeah, she's pregnant!
:''[Both laugh]''
:'''Cheech''': Hey, did she get the weed?
:'''Chong''': No, she's out of it, man. We're just waiting on some from Columbia.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Chong''': I dig it, man. It's good. But you know, while you were singing that, I came up with another song, man.
:'''Cheech''': Oh, yeah?
:'''Chong''': Yeah. It's like the same thing, only different.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Gloria's Mom''': ''[while driving]'' Watch the road.
:'''Cheech''': Okay, where's it gonna go?

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Guard at the Studio Entrance''': ''[to Cheech]'' Hey, fella, you need a pass.
:'''Cheech''': ''[covered in ashes after the car explosion]'' Oh, uh... I'm with the Towering Inferno, man.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Guard at the Studio Entrance''': ''[to Cheech after leaving in a van]'' Hey, fella, your pass?
:'''Cheech''': Pass? Oh, thanks a lot, man.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[After shifting gasoline that has spilt on their clothes, Chong tries to light a joint]''
:'''Chong''': You got a light, man?
:'''Cheech''': Huh? Oh yeah, here. ''[hands him a lighter]'' Hey, I don't think you better light it in here, man.
:'''Chong''': Why?
:'''Cheech''': Ah, these gas fumes, man.
:'''Chong''': Oh man. ''[flicks the lighter]''
:'''Cheech''': I don't know. ''[the inside of the car explodes]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Cheech''': Want me to teach you some Spanish, man?
:'''Chong''': Okay.
:'''Cheech''': When you see a friend, you say &quot;Hey, how's it going, Pendejo?&quot;
:'''Chong''': &quot;Hey, how's it going, Pendecko?&quot;
:'''Cheech''': ...Yeah, that's close enough.
:'''Chong''': What does that mean, man?
:'''Cheech''': Oh, it means my really good friend.
:'''Chong''': &quot;How's it going, Pend... Pen...&quot; How was that, again?
:'''Cheech''': Pendejo.
:'''Chong''': Pendecko.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza''': Cheech! Hey, you old pile of horseshit! How are you? Goddamn, you got ugly! How ya doing, man?
:'''Chong''': Good, man.
:'''Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza''': I haven't seen you in ten years, man!
:'''Chong''': I'm not Cheech, man.
:'''Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza''': What?
:'''Chong''': I'm Cheech's friend Chong.
:'''Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza''': Oh, hey, Ching! Good to meet you!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Desk Clerk''': ''[on phone with police]'' Look, this is the real thing this time! There are two crazies running around tearing the place up! I already told you our location! ERRRGH! Well, what are they doing, walking over here? Look, I think they're Iranians!... okay, thanks very much.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''[[Pee-wee Herman]]''': Hey, you guys look a little familiar to me!
:'''Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza''': Hey, you smell kinda familiar.
:'''[[Pee-wee Herman]]''': Ha, ha, ha. I'm the comedian. I'll tell the jokes, if you don't mind! If you think it's so easy, why don't you come up here and do it?
:'''Gloria's Mom''': Yeah, go up there and tell a joke!
:'''[[Pee-wee Herman]]''': That's right! You come up here and do it!
:'''Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza''': Okay!
:'''Chong''': Yeah, man!
:'''[[Pee-wee Herman]]''': Fuck this. I'm going somewhere else. Hey, hey, here! ''[gives Red the finger and storms off]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Chong''': You're driving like an idiot, man.
:'''Cheech''': I just can't get used to these automatics, man.
:'''Chong''': Yeah, they are real complicated, aren't they?

==Cast==
* [[w:Cheech Marin|Cheech Marin]] as Cheech and Dwayne &quot;Red&quot; Mendoza
* [[w:Tommy Chong|Tommy Chong]] as Chong &quot;Man&quot;
* [[w:Evelyn Guerrero|Evelyn Guerrero]] as Donna
* [[Paul Reubens]] as Desk clerk and Pee-wee Herman
* Betty Kennedy as Candy
* Sy Kramer as Mr. Neatnik
* Rikki Marin as Gloria
* [[w:Edie McClurg|Edie McClurg]] as Gloria's mom
* [[w:Bob McClurg|Bob McClurg]] as Chicken Charlie
* [[w:Rita Wilson|Rita Wilson]] as Actress wannabe
* [[w:Shelby Chong|Shelby Chong]] as Beautiful girl
* [[Phil Hartman]] as Chick Hazard - Private Eye
* [[w:Missy Cleveland|Missy Cleveland]] as Massage girl
* Kim Hopkins as Wardrobe girl
* [[w:Cassandra Peterson|Cassandra Peterson]] as Hostage
* [[w:Michael Winslow|Michael Winslow]] as Welfare Comedian
* [[w:Ed Peck|Ed Peck]] as Cop Shotgun
* [[w:Jonnie Barnett|Jonnie Barnett]] as Cop Driver
* [[w:Faith Minton|Faith Minton]] as female bouncer

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0080520}}

[[Category:1980 films]]
[[Category:1980 American films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Tommy Chong]]
[[Category:1980s American films]]
[[Category:Cheech &amp; Chong series]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Stoner films]]</text>
      <sha1>nl9mcqyop15rcrhurinffzcj6qbzz9x</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Substance</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>158377</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965055</id>
      <parentid>3918810</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:27:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39928-88</username>
        <id>3350118</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */ Boethius</comment>
      <origin>3965055</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="18516" sha1="ni8wzt84dzs3a38f1tjyqpbh6dckrzt" xml:space="preserve">[[File:A Young Pulsar Shows its Hand.jpg |thumb|right|Whatsoever can be perceived by the [[infinite]] intellect as constituting the [[essence]] of substance, belongs altogether only to one substance: consequently, substance thinking and substance extended are one and the same substance… ~ [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics]]'']]
'''[[w:Substance|Substance]]'''  (From Latin ''substantia'' for “substance, essence”, from ''substāns'','' substō'' for “exist&quot; or literally, &quot;stand under”) is a term indicating an [[essential]] [[quality]] of anything, especially the most vital aspects or portions. It also commonly refers to [[physical]] matter, or to anything with apparent substantiality, solidity, or firmness by various measures, including resources, property, or material possessions; in [[philosophy]] and [[theology]] it often refers to the [[w:hypostasis|hypostasis]] of [[reality]], the [[cosmos]], or [[God]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Julian of Norwich.jpg|thumb| Our Substance is our [[Father]], [[God]] Almighty, and our Substance is our [[Mother]], God, [[All]]-[[wisdom]]; and our Substance is in our Lord the [[Holy]] [[Spirit|Ghost]], God All-[[goodness]]. ~ [[Julian of Norwich]] ]] 
[[File:Ouroboros-benzene.svg|thumb|We are all made of the same stuff, [[remember]], we of the [[Jungle]], you of the [[City]]. The same substance composes us — the [[tree]] overhead, the [[stone]] beneath us, the [[bird]], the [[beast]], the [[star]] — we are [[all]] [[one]], all moving to the same [[end]]. Remember that when you no longer remember me, my [[child]]. ~ [[P. L. Travers]] ]]
[[File:Two Bee or Not Two Bee (6332939872).jpg|thumb|right|We pass. But what the [[bee]] [[knows]], the [[wisdom]] that sustains our passing [[life]] — however much we deny or ignore it — that for ever remains. ~ [[P. L. Travers]] ]]
*'' [Persona est] rationalis naturae individua substantia''. 
:*'''A perspn is an infividusl substance of rationslis nature' ''. 
:**[[Boethius]], ''Contra Eutychen et Nestorium' '. 

* '''[[Spinoza]]'s use of the term finite tends to make space the only form of substance, and all existing things but affections of space, and this, I think, is really one of the ultimate foundations of his system.'''
** [[George Boole]], in ''An Investigation of the Laws of Thought: On which are Founded the Mathematical Theories of Logic and Probabilities'' (1854), p. 215

*The ''trika'' is the essence of the ''śaiva'' tradition, and the ''Mālinī'' is the essence of the ''trika''. ([[Abhinavagupta]])
*In the Trika the god [[Shiva|Śiva]] mostly appears in the hypostasis of [[Bhairava]]. 
**[[Raniero Gnoli]]

* What matters for the progress of the myth is the fact common to all versions that the godhead, to meet the aggressor, had to produce a special &quot;creation&quot; representing his own self... in response to the ensuing fate of this divine [[w:Hypostasis (philosophy and religion)|hypostasis]] the further multiplication of divine figures out of the supreme source comes about. This is the general gnostic principle of [[w:Emanationism|emanation]]...
**[[Hans Jonas]], ''[[The Gnostic Religion]]'', 1963, p. 216

* The Divine [[Logos]] is God reflected in His own eternal Thought; in the Logos God is His own Object. This infinite Thought, the reflection and counterpart of God, subsisting in God as a Being or [[w:Hypostasis (philosophy and religion)|Hypostasis]], and having a tendency to self-communication,—such is the Logos. The Logos is the Thought of God, not intermittent and precarious like human thought, but subsisting with the intensity of a personal form. The very expression seems to court the argument of [[w:Athenagoas of Athens|Athenagoras]], that since God could never have been ἀλογος, the Logos must have been not created but eternal.
** [[Henry Liddon]], ''The Divinity of Our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ: Eight Lectures Preached before the University of Oxford in the Year 1866'', 16th edition (London: Longmans, Green, and Co., 1892), Lecture V: &quot;The Doctrine of Christ's Divinity in the Writings of St. John&quot;, pp. 230–231.

* This [[Idea]] of [[Spinoza]]'s we must allow to be in the main true and well-grounded; '''absolute substance is the truth, but it is not the whole truth; in order to be this, it must also be thought of as in itself active and living, and by that very means it must determine itself as mind.''' But substance with Spinoza is only the universal and consequently the abstract determination of mind ; it may undoubtedly be said that this thought is the foundation of all true views — not, however, as their absolutely fixed and permanent basis, but as the abstract unity which mind is in itself. It is therefore worthy of note that '''thought must begin by placing itself at the standpoint of [[w:Spinozism|Spinozism]]; to be a follower of Spinoza is the essential commencement of all Philosophy.''' For as we saw above … when man begins to philosophize, the soul must commence by bathing in this ether of the [[w:Monad|One Substance]], in which all that man has held as true has disappeared ; this negation of all that is particular, to which every philosopher must have come, is the liberation of the mind and its absolute foundation. 
** [[Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel]], comparing Spinoza's philosophy to that of the [[w:Eleatics|Eleatics]], in ''Lectures on the History of Philosophy'' (1896), Vol. 3, Ch. I : The Metaphysics of the Understanding, § 2 : Spinoza, p. 257

* The hypostasis of the particular methods of procedure employed by natural science … results in the view that all theoretical differences which rest on historically conditioned antagonisms of interest are to be settles by a “crucial experiment” rather than by struggle and counter-struggle. The harmonious relation of individuals to one another becomes a fact, therefore, that has even more general character than a law of nature.
** [[Max Horkheimer]], &quot;The Latest Attack on Metaphysics&quot; (1937), as published in ''Critical Theory: Selected Essays'' (1982), p. 148.

* Spinoza redefines the problem of Modern philosophy, which is the conquest of the world and the liberation of humanity, and destroys both its multiple antinomies and the continually resurgent separation (dualistic, transcendental, etc.) in the theory of knowledge and history, in the same way that criticism has always destroyed Zenonian sophism: moving forward, putting reality in motion. Spinoza's philosophy is born from the radicalization of the ontological paradox of being: in the recognition that the hypostasis, the only possible hypostasis, is that of the world and of the development of its necessity from physics to practice. It is a conception of the world that immediately produces, as if from its own basis, a completely modern conception of science and worldly knowledge, both technical and liberatory. It is a radically materialistic conception of being and of the world.
**''The Savage Anomaly: The Power of Spinoza's Metaphysics and Politics'' (1991) by [[Antonio Negri]], translated from the Italian by [[Michael Hardt and Antonio Negri|Michael Hardt]]. Originally published as ''L'anomalia selvaggia. Saggio su potere e potenza in Baruch Spinoza'' (Milano: Feltrinelli, 1981)

* '''Our [[Substance]] is our [[Father]], [[God]] Almighty, and our Substance is our [[Mother]], God, [[All]]-[[wisdom]]; and our Substance is in our Lord the [[Holy]] [[Spirit|Ghost]], God All-[[goodness]].'''
** [[Julian of Norwich]], in ''Revelations of Divine Love'' (c.1393), Ch. 58

*The world will accept you changing your style for them, but pretty soon they’re going to demand that you change your substance. They’re going to demand that you – well, they liked the fact that you’ve taken their method, but they’re going to demand you change your message.
**[[John F. MacArthur]], ''Ashamed of the Gospel: When the Church Becomes Like the World'' (1993)

* '''We shall see when we come to [[Newton]]'s laws of motion that in the words &quot;so far as in it lies,&quot; properly understood, is to be found the true primary definition of matter, and the true measure of its quantity.''' Descartes, however, never attained to a full understanding of his own words (''quantum in se est''), and so fell back on his original confusion of matter with space — space being, according to him, the only form of substance, and all existing things but affections of space. This error runs through every part of Descartes' great work, and it forms one of the ultimate foundations of the system of Spinoza. I shall not attempt to trace it down to more modern times, but I would advise those who study any system of metaphysics to examine carefully that part of it which deals with physical ideas. &lt;br /&gt; We shall find it more conducive to scientific progress to recognise, with Newton, the ideas of time and space as distinct, at least in thought, from that of the material system whose relations these ideas serve to co-ordinate.
** [[James Clerk Maxwell]], in ''[[Matter and Motion]]'' (1876)

* '''This identification of extension with substance runs through the whole of [[Descartes]]'s works, and it forms one of the ultimate foundations of the system of [[Spinoza]].'''
** [[James Clerk Maxwell]], &quot;Atom&quot; in ''Encyclopaedia Britannica'' as published in ''The Scientific Papers of James Clerk Maxwell'' (1890)

*Let no one think, however, that when we give him the name &quot;wisdom of God&quot; we mean anything without hypostatic existence that is, to take an illustration, that we understand him to be not as it were some wise living being,  but a certain  thing which makes men wise by revealing and imparting itself to those who are able to receive its influence and intelligence. If men it is once tighdy accepted that the only begotten Son of God is God's wisdom hypostatically existing, I do not think that our mind ought to stray beyond this to me suspicion that this hypostasis or substance could possibly possess bodily characteristics, since everything that is corporeal is distinguished by shape or color or size. And who in his sober senses ever looked for shape or color or measurable size in wisdom, considered solely as wisdom? 
** [[Origen]], ''On First Principles'', Bk. 1, Chapter II

* '''Things essentially incorporeal, because they are more excellent than all body and place, are every where, not with interval, but impartibly.''' &lt;br /&gt; Things essentially incorporeal are not locally present with bodies but are present with them when they please; by verging towards them so far as they are naturally adapted so to verge. They are not, however, present with them locally, but through habitude, proximity, and alliance. &lt;br /&gt; Things essentially incorporeal, are not present with bodies, by hypostasis and essence; for they are not mingled with bodies. But they impart a certain power which is proximate to bodies, through verging towards them. For tendency constitutes a certain secondary power proximate to bodies.
** [[Porphyry]], ''Auxiliaries to the Perception of Intelligible Natures'', 2 - 4

* Invention, it must be humbly admitted, does not consist in creating out of void, but out of chaos; the materials must, in the first place, be afforded: it can give form to dark, shapeless substances, but cannot bring into being the substance itself. In all matters of discovery and invention, even of those that appertain to the imagination, we are continually reminded of the story of [[Christopher Columbus|Columbus]] and his egg. Invention consists in the capacity of seizing on the capabilities of a subject, and in the power of moulding and fashioning ideas suggested to it.
** [[Mary Shelley]], in the Introduction to ''[[w:Frankenstein|Frankenstein]]'' (1818).

* '''By ''[[God]]'', I mean a being absolutely infinite — that is, a substance consisting in infinite attributes, of which each expresses eternal and infinite essentiality.''' &lt;br&gt; Explanation — I say absolutely infinite, not infinite after its kind: for, of a thing infinite only after its kind, infinite attributes may be denied; but '''that which is absolutely infinite, contains in its essence whatever expresses reality, and involves no negation.'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Definition 6

* '''Whatsoever can be perceived by the infinite intellect as constituting the essence of substance, belongs altogether only to one substance: consequently, substance thinking and substance extended are one and the same substance''', comprehended now through one attribute, now through another. So, also, a mode of extension and the idea of that mode are one and the same thing, though expressed in two ways. This truth seems to have been dimly recognized by those Jews who maintained that God, God's intellect, and the things understood by God are identical. ...Thus, whether we conceive of nature under the attribute of thought, or under any other attribute, we shall find the same order, or one and the same chain of causes — that is, the same things follow in either case. ...Wherefore of things as they are of themselves, God is really the cause, inasmuch as he consists of infinite attributes.
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 7: Note

* The being of substance does not appertain to the essence of man — in other words, substance does not constitute the actual being of man.
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 10

* '''Substance is in its nature infinite, immutable, indivisible...'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 10, Note

* '''God, or substance, consisting of infinite attributes, of which each expresses eternal and infinite essentiality, necessarily exists.'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 11

*It is also clear that there can be no [[w:accident (philosophy) |accident]] in [[God in Christianity|God]]. If all perfections are one in Him, and if [[existence of God|existence]], [[power]], action, and all such attributes pertain to [[perfection]], they are necessarily all identical with His [[essence]]. Therefore none of these perfections is an accident in God.
:Furthermore, a being to whose perfection something can be added, cannot be infinite in [[perfection]]. But if a being has some perfection that is an accident, a perfection can be added to its essence, since every accident is super-added to essence. Hence [[infinite]] perfection will not be found in its essence. But, as we have shown, God is of infinite perfection according to essence. Consequently there can be in Him no accidental perfection; whatever is in Him, is His substance.
:The same [[truth]] can be easily inferred from God’s supreme [[simplicity]], and from the fact that He is [[w:Actus purus|pure act]] and is the first among beings. For some sort of composition obtains between an accident and its subject. Likewise, that which is a subject of this kind cannot be pure act, since an accident is a certain, form or act of the subject. Similarly, what is per se always precedes what is per accidens. From all this we can infer, in keeping with the truths established above, that nothing can be predicated of God as an accident.
:*[[Thomas Aquinas]], ''[[Compendium Theologiae (Aquinas)|Compendium Theologiae]]'', [https://isidore.co/aquinas/english/Compendium.htm#23 Che. 23 - Absence of Accidents in God]. 

* We are all made of the same stuff, [[remember]], we of the [[Jungle]], you of the [[City]]. The same [[substance]] composes us — the [[tree]] overhead, the [[stone]] beneath us, the [[bird]], the [[beast]], the [[star]] — '''we are [[all]] [[one]], all moving to the same [[end]]. Remember that when you no longer remember me, my [[child]].'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], in ''[[w:Mary Poppins|Mary Poppins]]'' (1934), Hamadryad, the King Cobra, in Ch. 10 &quot;Full-Moon&quot;

* I have coined the phrase “'''[[Thinking]] is linking.'''” I thought of Kerenyi — “Mythology occupies a higher position in the bios, the Existence, of a people in which it is still alive than poetry, storytelling or any other art.” And of Malinowski — “Myth is not merely a story told, but a reality lived.” And, along with those, the word “Pollen,” the most pervasive substance in the world, kept knocking at my ear. Or rather, not knocking, but humming. What hums? What buzzes? What travels the world? Suddenly I found what I sought. “What the bee knows,” I told myself. “That is what I’m after.” &lt;br /&gt; But even as I patted my back, I found myself cursing, and not for the first time, the artful trickiness of words, their capriciousness, their lack of conscience. Betray them and they will betray you. Be true to them and, without compunction, they will also betray you, foxily turning all the tables, thumbing syntactical noses. For — ''note bene!'' — if you speak or write about What The Bee Knows, what the listener, or the reader, will get — indeed, cannot help but get — is Myth, Symbol, and Tradition! You see the [[paradox]]? The [[words]], by their very perfidy — which is also their honorable intention — have brought us to where we need to be. For, '''to stand in the [[presence]] of paradox, to be spiked on the horns of dilemma, between what is small and what is great, microcosm and macrocosm, or, if you like, the two ends of the stick, is the only posture we can assume in front of this ancient knowledge — one could even say everlasting knowledge.'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], in &quot;What the Bee Knows&quot; in ''Parabola : The Magazine of Myth and Tradition'', Vol. VI, No. 1 (February 1981); later published in ''What the Bee Knows : Reflections on Myth, Symbol, and Story'' (1989)

* '''You do not chop off a section of your [[imaginative]] substance and make a book specifically for [[children]], for — if you are [[honest]] — you have no [[idea]] where [[childhood]] [[ends]] and [[maturity]] [[begins]]. It is all [[Eternity|endless]] and [[all]] [[Unity|one]].'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], as quoted in ''Sticks and Stones : The Troublesome Success of Children's Literature from Slovenly Peter to Harry Potter'' (2002) by Jack Zipes

==See also==
* [[Transubstantiation]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wiktionary}}
{{commonscat|Matter}}

[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Religion]]
[[Category:Science]]</text>
      <sha1>ni8wzt84dzs3a38f1tjyqpbh6dckrzt</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965061</id>
      <parentid>3965055</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:41:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39928-88</username>
        <id>3350118</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965061</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="18512" sha1="5zvlgvpfkwdeaelml24vew4ayyudc37" xml:space="preserve">[[File:A Young Pulsar Shows its Hand.jpg |thumb|right|Whatsoever can be perceived by the [[infinite]] intellect as constituting the [[essence]] of substance, belongs altogether only to one substance: consequently, substance thinking and substance extended are one and the same substance… ~ [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics]]'']]
'''[[w:Substance|Substance]]'''  (From Latin ''substantia'' for “substance, essence”, from ''substāns'','' substō'' for “exist&quot; or literally, &quot;stand under”) is a term indicating an [[essential]] [[quality]] of anything, especially the most vital aspects or portions. It also commonly refers to [[physical]] matter, or to anything with apparent substantiality, solidity, or firmness by various measures, including resources, property, or material possessions; in [[philosophy]] and [[theology]] it often refers to the [[w:hypostasis|hypostasis]] of [[reality]], the [[cosmos]], or [[God]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Julian of Norwich.jpg|thumb| Our Substance is our [[Father]], [[God]] Almighty, and our Substance is our [[Mother]], God, [[All]]-[[wisdom]]; and our Substance is in our Lord the [[Holy]] [[Spirit|Ghost]], God All-[[goodness]]. ~ [[Julian of Norwich]] ]] 
[[File:Ouroboros-benzene.svg|thumb|We are all made of the same stuff, [[remember]], we of the [[Jungle]], you of the [[City]]. The same substance composes us — the [[tree]] overhead, the [[stone]] beneath us, the [[bird]], the [[beast]], the [[star]] — we are [[all]] [[one]], all moving to the same [[end]]. Remember that when you no longer remember me, my [[child]]. ~ [[P. L. Travers]] ]]
[[File:Two Bee or Not Two Bee (6332939872).jpg|thumb|right|We pass. But what the [[bee]] [[knows]], the [[wisdom]] that sustains our passing [[life]] — however much we deny or ignore it — that for ever remains. ~ [[P. L. Travers]] ]]
*''[Persona est] rationalis naturae individua substantia''. 
:*'''A person is an individual substance of rational nature'''. 
:**[[Boethius]], ''Contra Eutychen et Nestorium' '. 

* '''[[Spinoza]]'s use of the term finite tends to make space the only form of substance, and all existing things but affections of space, and this, I think, is really one of the ultimate foundations of his system.'''
** [[George Boole]], in ''An Investigation of the Laws of Thought: On which are Founded the Mathematical Theories of Logic and Probabilities'' (1854), p. 215

*The ''trika'' is the essence of the ''śaiva'' tradition, and the ''Mālinī'' is the essence of the ''trika''. ([[Abhinavagupta]])
*In the Trika the god [[Shiva|Śiva]] mostly appears in the hypostasis of [[Bhairava]]. 
**[[Raniero Gnoli]]

* What matters for the progress of the myth is the fact common to all versions that the godhead, to meet the aggressor, had to produce a special &quot;creation&quot; representing his own self... in response to the ensuing fate of this divine [[w:Hypostasis (philosophy and religion)|hypostasis]] the further multiplication of divine figures out of the supreme source comes about. This is the general gnostic principle of [[w:Emanationism|emanation]]...
**[[Hans Jonas]], ''[[The Gnostic Religion]]'', 1963, p. 216

* The Divine [[Logos]] is God reflected in His own eternal Thought; in the Logos God is His own Object. This infinite Thought, the reflection and counterpart of God, subsisting in God as a Being or [[w:Hypostasis (philosophy and religion)|Hypostasis]], and having a tendency to self-communication,—such is the Logos. The Logos is the Thought of God, not intermittent and precarious like human thought, but subsisting with the intensity of a personal form. The very expression seems to court the argument of [[w:Athenagoas of Athens|Athenagoras]], that since God could never have been ἀλογος, the Logos must have been not created but eternal.
** [[Henry Liddon]], ''The Divinity of Our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ: Eight Lectures Preached before the University of Oxford in the Year 1866'', 16th edition (London: Longmans, Green, and Co., 1892), Lecture V: &quot;The Doctrine of Christ's Divinity in the Writings of St. John&quot;, pp. 230–231.

* This [[Idea]] of [[Spinoza]]'s we must allow to be in the main true and well-grounded; '''absolute substance is the truth, but it is not the whole truth; in order to be this, it must also be thought of as in itself active and living, and by that very means it must determine itself as mind.''' But substance with Spinoza is only the universal and consequently the abstract determination of mind ; it may undoubtedly be said that this thought is the foundation of all true views — not, however, as their absolutely fixed and permanent basis, but as the abstract unity which mind is in itself. It is therefore worthy of note that '''thought must begin by placing itself at the standpoint of [[w:Spinozism|Spinozism]]; to be a follower of Spinoza is the essential commencement of all Philosophy.''' For as we saw above … when man begins to philosophize, the soul must commence by bathing in this ether of the [[w:Monad|One Substance]], in which all that man has held as true has disappeared ; this negation of all that is particular, to which every philosopher must have come, is the liberation of the mind and its absolute foundation. 
** [[Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel]], comparing Spinoza's philosophy to that of the [[w:Eleatics|Eleatics]], in ''Lectures on the History of Philosophy'' (1896), Vol. 3, Ch. I : The Metaphysics of the Understanding, § 2 : Spinoza, p. 257

* The hypostasis of the particular methods of procedure employed by natural science … results in the view that all theoretical differences which rest on historically conditioned antagonisms of interest are to be settles by a “crucial experiment” rather than by struggle and counter-struggle. The harmonious relation of individuals to one another becomes a fact, therefore, that has even more general character than a law of nature.
** [[Max Horkheimer]], &quot;The Latest Attack on Metaphysics&quot; (1937), as published in ''Critical Theory: Selected Essays'' (1982), p. 148.

* Spinoza redefines the problem of Modern philosophy, which is the conquest of the world and the liberation of humanity, and destroys both its multiple antinomies and the continually resurgent separation (dualistic, transcendental, etc.) in the theory of knowledge and history, in the same way that criticism has always destroyed Zenonian sophism: moving forward, putting reality in motion. Spinoza's philosophy is born from the radicalization of the ontological paradox of being: in the recognition that the hypostasis, the only possible hypostasis, is that of the world and of the development of its necessity from physics to practice. It is a conception of the world that immediately produces, as if from its own basis, a completely modern conception of science and worldly knowledge, both technical and liberatory. It is a radically materialistic conception of being and of the world.
**''The Savage Anomaly: The Power of Spinoza's Metaphysics and Politics'' (1991) by [[Antonio Negri]], translated from the Italian by [[Michael Hardt and Antonio Negri|Michael Hardt]]. Originally published as ''L'anomalia selvaggia. Saggio su potere e potenza in Baruch Spinoza'' (Milano: Feltrinelli, 1981)

* '''Our [[Substance]] is our [[Father]], [[God]] Almighty, and our Substance is our [[Mother]], God, [[All]]-[[wisdom]]; and our Substance is in our Lord the [[Holy]] [[Spirit|Ghost]], God All-[[goodness]].'''
** [[Julian of Norwich]], in ''Revelations of Divine Love'' (c.1393), Ch. 58

*The world will accept you changing your style for them, but pretty soon they’re going to demand that you change your substance. They’re going to demand that you – well, they liked the fact that you’ve taken their method, but they’re going to demand you change your message.
**[[John F. MacArthur]], ''Ashamed of the Gospel: When the Church Becomes Like the World'' (1993)

* '''We shall see when we come to [[Newton]]'s laws of motion that in the words &quot;so far as in it lies,&quot; properly understood, is to be found the true primary definition of matter, and the true measure of its quantity.''' Descartes, however, never attained to a full understanding of his own words (''quantum in se est''), and so fell back on his original confusion of matter with space — space being, according to him, the only form of substance, and all existing things but affections of space. This error runs through every part of Descartes' great work, and it forms one of the ultimate foundations of the system of Spinoza. I shall not attempt to trace it down to more modern times, but I would advise those who study any system of metaphysics to examine carefully that part of it which deals with physical ideas. &lt;br /&gt; We shall find it more conducive to scientific progress to recognise, with Newton, the ideas of time and space as distinct, at least in thought, from that of the material system whose relations these ideas serve to co-ordinate.
** [[James Clerk Maxwell]], in ''[[Matter and Motion]]'' (1876)

* '''This identification of extension with substance runs through the whole of [[Descartes]]'s works, and it forms one of the ultimate foundations of the system of [[Spinoza]].'''
** [[James Clerk Maxwell]], &quot;Atom&quot; in ''Encyclopaedia Britannica'' as published in ''The Scientific Papers of James Clerk Maxwell'' (1890)

*Let no one think, however, that when we give him the name &quot;wisdom of God&quot; we mean anything without hypostatic existence that is, to take an illustration, that we understand him to be not as it were some wise living being,  but a certain  thing which makes men wise by revealing and imparting itself to those who are able to receive its influence and intelligence. If men it is once tighdy accepted that the only begotten Son of God is God's wisdom hypostatically existing, I do not think that our mind ought to stray beyond this to me suspicion that this hypostasis or substance could possibly possess bodily characteristics, since everything that is corporeal is distinguished by shape or color or size. And who in his sober senses ever looked for shape or color or measurable size in wisdom, considered solely as wisdom? 
** [[Origen]], ''On First Principles'', Bk. 1, Chapter II

* '''Things essentially incorporeal, because they are more excellent than all body and place, are every where, not with interval, but impartibly.''' &lt;br /&gt; Things essentially incorporeal are not locally present with bodies but are present with them when they please; by verging towards them so far as they are naturally adapted so to verge. They are not, however, present with them locally, but through habitude, proximity, and alliance. &lt;br /&gt; Things essentially incorporeal, are not present with bodies, by hypostasis and essence; for they are not mingled with bodies. But they impart a certain power which is proximate to bodies, through verging towards them. For tendency constitutes a certain secondary power proximate to bodies.
** [[Porphyry]], ''Auxiliaries to the Perception of Intelligible Natures'', 2 - 4

* Invention, it must be humbly admitted, does not consist in creating out of void, but out of chaos; the materials must, in the first place, be afforded: it can give form to dark, shapeless substances, but cannot bring into being the substance itself. In all matters of discovery and invention, even of those that appertain to the imagination, we are continually reminded of the story of [[Christopher Columbus|Columbus]] and his egg. Invention consists in the capacity of seizing on the capabilities of a subject, and in the power of moulding and fashioning ideas suggested to it.
** [[Mary Shelley]], in the Introduction to ''[[w:Frankenstein|Frankenstein]]'' (1818).

* '''By ''[[God]]'', I mean a being absolutely infinite — that is, a substance consisting in infinite attributes, of which each expresses eternal and infinite essentiality.''' &lt;br&gt; Explanation — I say absolutely infinite, not infinite after its kind: for, of a thing infinite only after its kind, infinite attributes may be denied; but '''that which is absolutely infinite, contains in its essence whatever expresses reality, and involves no negation.'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Definition 6

* '''Whatsoever can be perceived by the infinite intellect as constituting the essence of substance, belongs altogether only to one substance: consequently, substance thinking and substance extended are one and the same substance''', comprehended now through one attribute, now through another. So, also, a mode of extension and the idea of that mode are one and the same thing, though expressed in two ways. This truth seems to have been dimly recognized by those Jews who maintained that God, God's intellect, and the things understood by God are identical. ...Thus, whether we conceive of nature under the attribute of thought, or under any other attribute, we shall find the same order, or one and the same chain of causes — that is, the same things follow in either case. ...Wherefore of things as they are of themselves, God is really the cause, inasmuch as he consists of infinite attributes.
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 7: Note

* The being of substance does not appertain to the essence of man — in other words, substance does not constitute the actual being of man.
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 10

* '''Substance is in its nature infinite, immutable, indivisible...'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 10, Note

* '''God, or substance, consisting of infinite attributes, of which each expresses eternal and infinite essentiality, necessarily exists.'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 11

*It is also clear that there can be no [[w:accident (philosophy) |accident]] in [[God in Christianity|God]]. If all perfections are one in Him, and if [[existence of God|existence]], [[power]], action, and all such attributes pertain to [[perfection]], they are necessarily all identical with His [[essence]]. Therefore none of these perfections is an accident in God.
:Furthermore, a being to whose perfection something can be added, cannot be infinite in [[perfection]]. But if a being has some perfection that is an accident, a perfection can be added to its essence, since every accident is super-added to essence. Hence [[infinite]] perfection will not be found in its essence. But, as we have shown, God is of infinite perfection according to essence. Consequently there can be in Him no accidental perfection; whatever is in Him, is His substance.
:The same [[truth]] can be easily inferred from God’s supreme [[simplicity]], and from the fact that He is [[w:Actus purus|pure act]] and is the first among beings. For some sort of composition obtains between an accident and its subject. Likewise, that which is a subject of this kind cannot be pure act, since an accident is a certain, form or act of the subject. Similarly, what is per se always precedes what is per accidens. From all this we can infer, in keeping with the truths established above, that nothing can be predicated of God as an accident.
:*[[Thomas Aquinas]], ''[[Compendium Theologiae (Aquinas)|Compendium Theologiae]]'', [https://isidore.co/aquinas/english/Compendium.htm#23 Che. 23 - Absence of Accidents in God]. 

* We are all made of the same stuff, [[remember]], we of the [[Jungle]], you of the [[City]]. The same [[substance]] composes us — the [[tree]] overhead, the [[stone]] beneath us, the [[bird]], the [[beast]], the [[star]] — '''we are [[all]] [[one]], all moving to the same [[end]]. Remember that when you no longer remember me, my [[child]].'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], in ''[[w:Mary Poppins|Mary Poppins]]'' (1934), Hamadryad, the King Cobra, in Ch. 10 &quot;Full-Moon&quot;

* I have coined the phrase “'''[[Thinking]] is linking.'''” I thought of Kerenyi — “Mythology occupies a higher position in the bios, the Existence, of a people in which it is still alive than poetry, storytelling or any other art.” And of Malinowski — “Myth is not merely a story told, but a reality lived.” And, along with those, the word “Pollen,” the most pervasive substance in the world, kept knocking at my ear. Or rather, not knocking, but humming. What hums? What buzzes? What travels the world? Suddenly I found what I sought. “What the bee knows,” I told myself. “That is what I’m after.” &lt;br /&gt; But even as I patted my back, I found myself cursing, and not for the first time, the artful trickiness of words, their capriciousness, their lack of conscience. Betray them and they will betray you. Be true to them and, without compunction, they will also betray you, foxily turning all the tables, thumbing syntactical noses. For — ''note bene!'' — if you speak or write about What The Bee Knows, what the listener, or the reader, will get — indeed, cannot help but get — is Myth, Symbol, and Tradition! You see the [[paradox]]? The [[words]], by their very perfidy — which is also their honorable intention — have brought us to where we need to be. For, '''to stand in the [[presence]] of paradox, to be spiked on the horns of dilemma, between what is small and what is great, microcosm and macrocosm, or, if you like, the two ends of the stick, is the only posture we can assume in front of this ancient knowledge — one could even say everlasting knowledge.'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], in &quot;What the Bee Knows&quot; in ''Parabola : The Magazine of Myth and Tradition'', Vol. VI, No. 1 (February 1981); later published in ''What the Bee Knows : Reflections on Myth, Symbol, and Story'' (1989)

* '''You do not chop off a section of your [[imaginative]] substance and make a book specifically for [[children]], for — if you are [[honest]] — you have no [[idea]] where [[childhood]] [[ends]] and [[maturity]] [[begins]]. It is all [[Eternity|endless]] and [[all]] [[Unity|one]].'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], as quoted in ''Sticks and Stones : The Troublesome Success of Children's Literature from Slovenly Peter to Harry Potter'' (2002) by Jack Zipes

==See also==
* [[Transubstantiation]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wiktionary}}
{{commonscat|Matter}}

[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Religion]]
[[Category:Science]]</text>
      <sha1>5zvlgvpfkwdeaelml24vew4ayyudc37</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965064</id>
      <parentid>3965061</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:48:08Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39928-88</username>
        <id>3350118</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3965064</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="18511" sha1="qm6zc51sh5orlge3iwdx9mpzc3kynvn" xml:space="preserve">[[File:A Young Pulsar Shows its Hand.jpg |thumb|right|Whatsoever can be perceived by the [[infinite]] intellect as constituting the [[essence]] of substance, belongs altogether only to one substance: consequently, substance thinking and substance extended are one and the same substance… ~ [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics]]'']]
'''[[w:Substance|Substance]]'''  (From Latin ''substantia'' for “substance, essence”, from ''substāns'','' substō'' for “exist&quot; or literally, &quot;stand under”) is a term indicating an [[essential]] [[quality]] of anything, especially the most vital aspects or portions. It also commonly refers to [[physical]] matter, or to anything with apparent substantiality, solidity, or firmness by various measures, including resources, property, or material possessions; in [[philosophy]] and [[theology]] it often refers to the [[w:hypostasis|hypostasis]] of [[reality]], the [[cosmos]], or [[God]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Julian of Norwich.jpg|thumb| Our Substance is our [[Father]], [[God]] Almighty, and our Substance is our [[Mother]], God, [[All]]-[[wisdom]]; and our Substance is in our Lord the [[Holy]] [[Spirit|Ghost]], God All-[[goodness]]. ~ [[Julian of Norwich]] ]] 
[[File:Ouroboros-benzene.svg|thumb|We are all made of the same stuff, [[remember]], we of the [[Jungle]], you of the [[City]]. The same substance composes us — the [[tree]] overhead, the [[stone]] beneath us, the [[bird]], the [[beast]], the [[star]] — we are [[all]] [[one]], all moving to the same [[end]]. Remember that when you no longer remember me, my [[child]]. ~ [[P. L. Travers]] ]]
[[File:Two Bee or Not Two Bee (6332939872).jpg|thumb|right|We pass. But what the [[bee]] [[knows]], the [[wisdom]] that sustains our passing [[life]] — however much we deny or ignore it — that for ever remains. ~ [[P. L. Travers]] ]]
*''[Persona est] rationalis naturae individua substantia''. 
:*'''A person is an individual substance of rational nature'''. 
:**[[Boethius]], ''Contra Eutychen et Nestorium''. 

* '''[[Spinoza]]'s use of the term finite tends to make space the only form of substance, and all existing things but affections of space, and this, I think, is really one of the ultimate foundations of his system.'''
** [[George Boole]], in ''An Investigation of the Laws of Thought: On which are Founded the Mathematical Theories of Logic and Probabilities'' (1854), p. 215

*The ''trika'' is the essence of the ''śaiva'' tradition, and the ''Mālinī'' is the essence of the ''trika''. ([[Abhinavagupta]])
*In the Trika the god [[Shiva|Śiva]] mostly appears in the hypostasis of [[Bhairava]]. 
**[[Raniero Gnoli]]

* What matters for the progress of the myth is the fact common to all versions that the godhead, to meet the aggressor, had to produce a special &quot;creation&quot; representing his own self... in response to the ensuing fate of this divine [[w:Hypostasis (philosophy and religion)|hypostasis]] the further multiplication of divine figures out of the supreme source comes about. This is the general gnostic principle of [[w:Emanationism|emanation]]...
**[[Hans Jonas]], ''[[The Gnostic Religion]]'', 1963, p. 216

* The Divine [[Logos]] is God reflected in His own eternal Thought; in the Logos God is His own Object. This infinite Thought, the reflection and counterpart of God, subsisting in God as a Being or [[w:Hypostasis (philosophy and religion)|Hypostasis]], and having a tendency to self-communication,—such is the Logos. The Logos is the Thought of God, not intermittent and precarious like human thought, but subsisting with the intensity of a personal form. The very expression seems to court the argument of [[w:Athenagoas of Athens|Athenagoras]], that since God could never have been ἀλογος, the Logos must have been not created but eternal.
** [[Henry Liddon]], ''The Divinity of Our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ: Eight Lectures Preached before the University of Oxford in the Year 1866'', 16th edition (London: Longmans, Green, and Co., 1892), Lecture V: &quot;The Doctrine of Christ's Divinity in the Writings of St. John&quot;, pp. 230–231.

* This [[Idea]] of [[Spinoza]]'s we must allow to be in the main true and well-grounded; '''absolute substance is the truth, but it is not the whole truth; in order to be this, it must also be thought of as in itself active and living, and by that very means it must determine itself as mind.''' But substance with Spinoza is only the universal and consequently the abstract determination of mind ; it may undoubtedly be said that this thought is the foundation of all true views — not, however, as their absolutely fixed and permanent basis, but as the abstract unity which mind is in itself. It is therefore worthy of note that '''thought must begin by placing itself at the standpoint of [[w:Spinozism|Spinozism]]; to be a follower of Spinoza is the essential commencement of all Philosophy.''' For as we saw above … when man begins to philosophize, the soul must commence by bathing in this ether of the [[w:Monad|One Substance]], in which all that man has held as true has disappeared ; this negation of all that is particular, to which every philosopher must have come, is the liberation of the mind and its absolute foundation. 
** [[Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel]], comparing Spinoza's philosophy to that of the [[w:Eleatics|Eleatics]], in ''Lectures on the History of Philosophy'' (1896), Vol. 3, Ch. I : The Metaphysics of the Understanding, § 2 : Spinoza, p. 257

* The hypostasis of the particular methods of procedure employed by natural science … results in the view that all theoretical differences which rest on historically conditioned antagonisms of interest are to be settles by a “crucial experiment” rather than by struggle and counter-struggle. The harmonious relation of individuals to one another becomes a fact, therefore, that has even more general character than a law of nature.
** [[Max Horkheimer]], &quot;The Latest Attack on Metaphysics&quot; (1937), as published in ''Critical Theory: Selected Essays'' (1982), p. 148.

* Spinoza redefines the problem of Modern philosophy, which is the conquest of the world and the liberation of humanity, and destroys both its multiple antinomies and the continually resurgent separation (dualistic, transcendental, etc.) in the theory of knowledge and history, in the same way that criticism has always destroyed Zenonian sophism: moving forward, putting reality in motion. Spinoza's philosophy is born from the radicalization of the ontological paradox of being: in the recognition that the hypostasis, the only possible hypostasis, is that of the world and of the development of its necessity from physics to practice. It is a conception of the world that immediately produces, as if from its own basis, a completely modern conception of science and worldly knowledge, both technical and liberatory. It is a radically materialistic conception of being and of the world.
**''The Savage Anomaly: The Power of Spinoza's Metaphysics and Politics'' (1991) by [[Antonio Negri]], translated from the Italian by [[Michael Hardt and Antonio Negri|Michael Hardt]]. Originally published as ''L'anomalia selvaggia. Saggio su potere e potenza in Baruch Spinoza'' (Milano: Feltrinelli, 1981)

* '''Our [[Substance]] is our [[Father]], [[God]] Almighty, and our Substance is our [[Mother]], God, [[All]]-[[wisdom]]; and our Substance is in our Lord the [[Holy]] [[Spirit|Ghost]], God All-[[goodness]].'''
** [[Julian of Norwich]], in ''Revelations of Divine Love'' (c.1393), Ch. 58

*The world will accept you changing your style for them, but pretty soon they’re going to demand that you change your substance. They’re going to demand that you – well, they liked the fact that you’ve taken their method, but they’re going to demand you change your message.
**[[John F. MacArthur]], ''Ashamed of the Gospel: When the Church Becomes Like the World'' (1993)

* '''We shall see when we come to [[Newton]]'s laws of motion that in the words &quot;so far as in it lies,&quot; properly understood, is to be found the true primary definition of matter, and the true measure of its quantity.''' Descartes, however, never attained to a full understanding of his own words (''quantum in se est''), and so fell back on his original confusion of matter with space — space being, according to him, the only form of substance, and all existing things but affections of space. This error runs through every part of Descartes' great work, and it forms one of the ultimate foundations of the system of Spinoza. I shall not attempt to trace it down to more modern times, but I would advise those who study any system of metaphysics to examine carefully that part of it which deals with physical ideas. &lt;br /&gt; We shall find it more conducive to scientific progress to recognise, with Newton, the ideas of time and space as distinct, at least in thought, from that of the material system whose relations these ideas serve to co-ordinate.
** [[James Clerk Maxwell]], in ''[[Matter and Motion]]'' (1876)

* '''This identification of extension with substance runs through the whole of [[Descartes]]'s works, and it forms one of the ultimate foundations of the system of [[Spinoza]].'''
** [[James Clerk Maxwell]], &quot;Atom&quot; in ''Encyclopaedia Britannica'' as published in ''The Scientific Papers of James Clerk Maxwell'' (1890)

*Let no one think, however, that when we give him the name &quot;wisdom of God&quot; we mean anything without hypostatic existence that is, to take an illustration, that we understand him to be not as it were some wise living being,  but a certain  thing which makes men wise by revealing and imparting itself to those who are able to receive its influence and intelligence. If men it is once tighdy accepted that the only begotten Son of God is God's wisdom hypostatically existing, I do not think that our mind ought to stray beyond this to me suspicion that this hypostasis or substance could possibly possess bodily characteristics, since everything that is corporeal is distinguished by shape or color or size. And who in his sober senses ever looked for shape or color or measurable size in wisdom, considered solely as wisdom? 
** [[Origen]], ''On First Principles'', Bk. 1, Chapter II

* '''Things essentially incorporeal, because they are more excellent than all body and place, are every where, not with interval, but impartibly.''' &lt;br /&gt; Things essentially incorporeal are not locally present with bodies but are present with them when they please; by verging towards them so far as they are naturally adapted so to verge. They are not, however, present with them locally, but through habitude, proximity, and alliance. &lt;br /&gt; Things essentially incorporeal, are not present with bodies, by hypostasis and essence; for they are not mingled with bodies. But they impart a certain power which is proximate to bodies, through verging towards them. For tendency constitutes a certain secondary power proximate to bodies.
** [[Porphyry]], ''Auxiliaries to the Perception of Intelligible Natures'', 2 - 4

* Invention, it must be humbly admitted, does not consist in creating out of void, but out of chaos; the materials must, in the first place, be afforded: it can give form to dark, shapeless substances, but cannot bring into being the substance itself. In all matters of discovery and invention, even of those that appertain to the imagination, we are continually reminded of the story of [[Christopher Columbus|Columbus]] and his egg. Invention consists in the capacity of seizing on the capabilities of a subject, and in the power of moulding and fashioning ideas suggested to it.
** [[Mary Shelley]], in the Introduction to ''[[w:Frankenstein|Frankenstein]]'' (1818).

* '''By ''[[God]]'', I mean a being absolutely infinite — that is, a substance consisting in infinite attributes, of which each expresses eternal and infinite essentiality.''' &lt;br&gt; Explanation — I say absolutely infinite, not infinite after its kind: for, of a thing infinite only after its kind, infinite attributes may be denied; but '''that which is absolutely infinite, contains in its essence whatever expresses reality, and involves no negation.'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Definition 6

* '''Whatsoever can be perceived by the infinite intellect as constituting the essence of substance, belongs altogether only to one substance: consequently, substance thinking and substance extended are one and the same substance''', comprehended now through one attribute, now through another. So, also, a mode of extension and the idea of that mode are one and the same thing, though expressed in two ways. This truth seems to have been dimly recognized by those Jews who maintained that God, God's intellect, and the things understood by God are identical. ...Thus, whether we conceive of nature under the attribute of thought, or under any other attribute, we shall find the same order, or one and the same chain of causes — that is, the same things follow in either case. ...Wherefore of things as they are of themselves, God is really the cause, inasmuch as he consists of infinite attributes.
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 7: Note

* The being of substance does not appertain to the essence of man — in other words, substance does not constitute the actual being of man.
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 10

* '''Substance is in its nature infinite, immutable, indivisible...'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 10, Note

* '''God, or substance, consisting of infinite attributes, of which each expresses eternal and infinite essentiality, necessarily exists.'''
** [[Baruch Spinoza]], in ''[[Ethics (book)|Ethics Geometrically Demonstrated]]'' (1677), Prop. 11

*It is also clear that there can be no [[w:accident (philosophy) |accident]] in [[God in Christianity|God]]. If all perfections are one in Him, and if [[existence of God|existence]], [[power]], action, and all such attributes pertain to [[perfection]], they are necessarily all identical with His [[essence]]. Therefore none of these perfections is an accident in God.
:Furthermore, a being to whose perfection something can be added, cannot be infinite in [[perfection]]. But if a being has some perfection that is an accident, a perfection can be added to its essence, since every accident is super-added to essence. Hence [[infinite]] perfection will not be found in its essence. But, as we have shown, God is of infinite perfection according to essence. Consequently there can be in Him no accidental perfection; whatever is in Him, is His substance.
:The same [[truth]] can be easily inferred from God’s supreme [[simplicity]], and from the fact that He is [[w:Actus purus|pure act]] and is the first among beings. For some sort of composition obtains between an accident and its subject. Likewise, that which is a subject of this kind cannot be pure act, since an accident is a certain, form or act of the subject. Similarly, what is per se always precedes what is per accidens. From all this we can infer, in keeping with the truths established above, that nothing can be predicated of God as an accident.
:*[[Thomas Aquinas]], ''[[Compendium Theologiae (Aquinas)|Compendium Theologiae]]'', [https://isidore.co/aquinas/english/Compendium.htm#23 Che. 23 - Absence of Accidents in God]. 

* We are all made of the same stuff, [[remember]], we of the [[Jungle]], you of the [[City]]. The same [[substance]] composes us — the [[tree]] overhead, the [[stone]] beneath us, the [[bird]], the [[beast]], the [[star]] — '''we are [[all]] [[one]], all moving to the same [[end]]. Remember that when you no longer remember me, my [[child]].'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], in ''[[w:Mary Poppins|Mary Poppins]]'' (1934), Hamadryad, the King Cobra, in Ch. 10 &quot;Full-Moon&quot;

* I have coined the phrase “'''[[Thinking]] is linking.'''” I thought of Kerenyi — “Mythology occupies a higher position in the bios, the Existence, of a people in which it is still alive than poetry, storytelling or any other art.” And of Malinowski — “Myth is not merely a story told, but a reality lived.” And, along with those, the word “Pollen,” the most pervasive substance in the world, kept knocking at my ear. Or rather, not knocking, but humming. What hums? What buzzes? What travels the world? Suddenly I found what I sought. “What the bee knows,” I told myself. “That is what I’m after.” &lt;br /&gt; But even as I patted my back, I found myself cursing, and not for the first time, the artful trickiness of words, their capriciousness, their lack of conscience. Betray them and they will betray you. Be true to them and, without compunction, they will also betray you, foxily turning all the tables, thumbing syntactical noses. For — ''note bene!'' — if you speak or write about What The Bee Knows, what the listener, or the reader, will get — indeed, cannot help but get — is Myth, Symbol, and Tradition! You see the [[paradox]]? The [[words]], by their very perfidy — which is also their honorable intention — have brought us to where we need to be. For, '''to stand in the [[presence]] of paradox, to be spiked on the horns of dilemma, between what is small and what is great, microcosm and macrocosm, or, if you like, the two ends of the stick, is the only posture we can assume in front of this ancient knowledge — one could even say everlasting knowledge.'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], in &quot;What the Bee Knows&quot; in ''Parabola : The Magazine of Myth and Tradition'', Vol. VI, No. 1 (February 1981); later published in ''What the Bee Knows : Reflections on Myth, Symbol, and Story'' (1989)

* '''You do not chop off a section of your [[imaginative]] substance and make a book specifically for [[children]], for — if you are [[honest]] — you have no [[idea]] where [[childhood]] [[ends]] and [[maturity]] [[begins]]. It is all [[Eternity|endless]] and [[all]] [[Unity|one]].'''
** [[P. L. Travers]], as quoted in ''Sticks and Stones : The Troublesome Success of Children's Literature from Slovenly Peter to Harry Potter'' (2002) by Jack Zipes

==See also==
* [[Transubstantiation]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wiktionary}}
{{commonscat|Matter}}

[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Religion]]
[[Category:Science]]</text>
      <sha1>qm6zc51sh5orlge3iwdx9mpzc3kynvn</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sikhs</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>158582</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964937</id>
      <parentid>3283157</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:06:45Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964937</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="21478" sha1="l6iakn8hsurtmjdttmv7jf0c8z8ldg6" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Sikhs|Sikhs]]''' (/siːk/ or /sɪk/; Punjabi: ਸਿੱਖ, sikkh [sɪkkʰ] Devanagari: सिख) are an ethnoreligious group who adhere to Sikhi or [[Sikhism]], an Indian religion that originated in the late 15th century in the Punjab region of the Indian subcontinent, based on the revelation of [[Guru Nanak]]. The term Sikh has its origin in the Sanskrit word śiṣya (शिष्य), meaning 'disciple' or 'student'.
==Quotes==

*The Siques are in general strong and well made, accustomed from their Infancy to the most labourious Life and hardest fare, they make marches and undergo fatigues that will appear really astonishing. In their Excursions they carry no tents or baggage with them, except perhaps a small tent for the principal Chief, the rest Shelter themselves under a Blanket, which serves them also in the cold Weather, to wrap themselves in, and which in a March covers their Saddles. They have mostly two horses a piece, and some three; their horses are middle sized, but exceeding good, strong and high spirited, and mild tempered; The Provinces of Lahore and Multan, noted for producing the best Horses in Indostan, supply them amply, and indeed they take the greatest Care to encrease their numbers by all means in their power, and tho’ they make merry in the Demise of one of their Brethren, they condole and lament the Death of a Horse, thus shewing their Value for an animal so necessary to them in their Excursions.&lt;br&gt;The Sect of the Siques has a strong taint of the Gentoo Religion, they venerate the Cow, and abstain piously from killing or feeding on it, and they also pay some Respect to the Devtas or Idols. But their great object of worship is with them their own saints, or those whom they have honoured with the name of Gorou. Those they invoke continually and they seem to look on them as everything. Wah Gorou repeated several times is their only Simbol, from which the Musulmen have (not without Reason) taxed them with being downright Atheists. Their mode of initiating their Converts, is by making them drink out of a Pan in which the feet of those present have been washed meaning by that, I presume, to abolish all those Distinctions of Casts which so much encumber the Gentoos; they also steep in it, particularly for a Musulman the tusks or Bones of a Boar and add some of the Blood of that Animal to it. This with repeating the Simbol to Wah Gorou wearing an Iron Bracelet on one Arm, and letting the Hair of the head and beard grown forms the whole Mystery of their Religion, if such a filthy beastly Ceremony, can be dignified with that name. They have also stated Pilgrimages both to the Ganges and their famous Tank at Ambarsar where at fixed times they wash and perform some trifling Ceremonies invoking at the same time their Gorou.
**Sikhs accustomed to arduous life, Antoine Louis Henri Polier, a Frenchman [1741-1795] who arrived in India in 1757, married two Indian women and stayed in the country for thirty-two years. The following is from a paper he read before the Asiatic Society of Bengal in 1781 . quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*The inhabitants throughout this country, and as far as the Sutledge, bear a high character for hospitality and kindness to strangers. Their benevolence is not narrowed by bigotry or prejudice, and disclaims the distinctions of religion or complexion. They are particularly attentive to travellers of all casts or countries. The chief of every town makes a point of subsisting all poor and needy travellers, from his own funds, a part of which are set aside for that purpose, and when that fall short, from an increased number of indigent claimants, their wants are supplied by a subscription made from the principal inhabitants of the place. It is very pleasing to travel through the town and villages of this country. The inhabitants receive the stranger with an air of welcome that prepossesses him in their favour. They are, at the same time, courteous and respectful, contrary to what the traveller experiences in Mussulman towns, where he is looked upon with contempt, and regarded as an unwelcome intruder. The character of the Sikhs had been represented to me in a very favourable light, and my own observations confirmed all that I had heard in their favour. They are just and amiable in their social intercourse, and affectionate in their domestic relations. One quality particularly raises the character of the Sikhs above all other Asiatics, and that is, their higher veneration for truth. Both as a people and as individuals, they may be considered as much less addicted to the low artifices of evasion, lying or dissimulation, than any other race of Asiatics. Implicit dependence may be placed upon their promise, in all matters either of public or private concern, and if a Sikh declares himself you friend, he will not disappoint your confidence, if, on the other hand, he bears enmity to any one, he declares it without reserve. – Upon the whole, they are a plain, manly, hospitable, and industrious people, and by far the best race I have ever met in India. They have all the essential qualities of a good soldier: – in their persons they are hardy and athletic; of active habits, patient, faithful, and brave. They are strongly attached to their chiefs, and will never desert them, while they are well treated.
** High veneration for truth; from the manuscript notes of an officer of the Bengal army [probably Captain Matthews, Deputy Commissary of Ordnance at Fatehgarh who travelled through Punjab in 1808 in an unofficial capacity [Asiatic Annual Register, vol. X1, for the Year 1809126quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*4th July 1809 –…The town of Rawil Pindee is large and populous. It is a pretty place, is composed of terraced houses, and is very like a town west of the Indus. The country round is open, scattered with single hills, and tolerably cultivated, We halted here for six days to get Runjeet Sing’s leave to advance. We now saw a good deal of the Siks, whom we found to be disposed to be civil, and by no means unpleasing. They were manly in their appearance, and were tall, and thin, though muscular. They wore little clothes, their legs, half their thighs, and generally their arms and bodies, being bare; but they had often large scarfs, thrown loosely over one shoulder. Their turbans were not large, but high, and rather flattened in front. Their beards, and hair on their heads and bodies, are never touched by scissors. They generally carry matchlocks, or bows, the better sort generally bows; and never pay a visit without a fine one in their hand, and an embroidered quiver by their side. They speak Punjaubee, and sometimes attempt Hindoostaunee, but I seldom understood them without an interpreter. Persian was quite unknown. They do not know the name of the Dooraunees, though that tribe has often conquered their country. They either call them by the general name of Khorassaunees, or by the erroneous one of Ghiljee.
** Pleasing appearance, Mountstuart Elphinstone who undertook a mission to Kabul in 1801  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*As men, physically speaking, the natives of the Panjab are superior to those of Hindustan Proper. Their limbs are muscular and well proportioned, and they have a stoutness of leg and calf, seldom seen in the Hindustani. Instances of very tall stature may be rare, the general standard being a little above the middle size. The Sikhs are certainly a fine race of men, particularly the better classes. Their females, being seldom permitted to go abroad, I can scarcely speak decidedly concerning them, but the five or six I have by chance met with, would justify the supposition that they are very attractive. They wear extraordinary high conical caps, producing a curious effect, with trowsers. The dress of the men is peculiar, but nor inelegant, consisting of the Panjab pagri for the head, a vest, or jacket, fitting close to the body and arms, with large, bulky trowsers, terminating at the knee, the legs from the knee being naked. Chiefs occasionally wear full trowsers, which, however, are recent introductions, and many people remember the time when the Maharaja and his court could scarcely be said to wear trowsers at all. Over the shoulders, a scarf is usually thrown. Generally speaking, these articles of dress are white. The Sikhs, to their honour, are very cleanly in their linen, in which particular they advantageously differ from their Mussulman compatriots. Their scarfs are usually trimmed with a coloured silk border, and sometimes scarlet shawls, or other showy fabrics, are employed. The Sikhs allow the hair of their heads to attain its full growth, and gather it up into a knot at the crown, agreeably to the old Jetic fashion. By pressing it tightly back from the forehead they somewhat elevate the upper part of the face, which imparts a peculiar cast to the countenance. &lt;br&gt; The Sikhs are almost exclusively a military and agricultural people. They pay much attention to the breeding of horses, and there is scarcely one of them who has not one or more brood mares. Hence, amongst the irregular cavalry – a service to which they are partial – nearly every man’s horse is bona fide his own property, and even in the regular cavalry a very trifling proportion of the horses belong to the Maharaja. It must be confessed that the Sikhs are barbarous, so far as the want of information and intelligence can make them, yet they have not that savage disposition which makes demons of the rude tribes of the more western countries. They are frank, generous, social, and lively. The cruelties they have practiced against the Mahomedans in the countries they have subdued ought not, I think, to be alleged against them as a proof of their ferocity. Heaven knows, the fury of the bigoted Mahomedan is terrible, and the persecuted Sikhs, in their day, were literally hunted like beasts of the field. At present, flushed by a series of victories, they have a zeal and buoyancy of spirit amounting to enthusiasm; and with the power of taking the most exemplary revenge, they have been still more lenient than the Mahomedans were ever towards them…
** The natives of the Panjab, Charles Masso  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*The dominions of the Sicques, now widely extended, have been since divided into numerous states, which pursue an independent interest, without a regard to general policy. The grand assembly is now rarely summoned, nor have the Sicques, since the Afghan war, been embarked in any united cause. Their military force may be said to consist essentially of cavalry; for, though some artillery is maintained, it is awkwardly managed, and its uses ill understood and their infantry, held in low estimation, usually garrison the forts, and are employed in the meaner duties of the service. &lt;br&gt;A Sicque horseman is armed with a matchlock and sabre of excellent metal, and his horse is strong and well formed. In this matter I speak from a personal knowledge, having in the course of my journey seen two of their parties, each of which amounted to about two hundred horse-men. They were clothed in white vests, and their arms were preserved in good order: the accoutrements, consisting of priming-horns and ammunition pouches, were chiefly covered with European scarlet cloth, and ornamented with gold lace. The predilection of the Sicques for the match-lock musquet and the constant use they make of it, causes a difference in their manner of attack from that of any other Indian cavalry; a party, from forty to fifty, advance in a quick pace to the distance of a carbine shot from the enemy, and then, that the fire may be given with the greater certainty, the horses are drawn up, and their pieces discharged; when, speedily retiring about a hundred paces, they load, and repeat the same mode of annoying the enemy. The horses have been so expertly trained to the performance of this operation, that, on receiving a stroke of the hand, they stop from a full career. But it is not by this mode of combat that the Sicques have become a formidable people. Their successes and conquests have largely originated from an activity unparalleled by other Indian nations, from their endurance of excessive fatigue, and a keen resentment of injuries. The personal endowments of the Sicques are derived from a temperance of diet, and a forbearance from many of those sensual pleasures which have enervated the Indian Mahometans. A body of their cavalry has been known to make marches of forty or fifty miles, and to continue the exertion for many successive days.&lt;br&gt;The forces of this nation must be numerous, though I am not possessed of any substantial document for ascertaining the amount. A Sicque will confidently say, that his country can furnish three hundred thousand cavalry, and, to authenticate the assertion, affirms that every person, holding even a small property, is provided with a horse, match-lock, and side-arms. But in qualification of this account, if we admit that the Sicques when united can bring two hundred thousand horse into the field, their force in cavalry is greater than that of any other state in Hindostan.…
** Military strength of Sikhs, George Forster  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*After performing the requisite duties of their religion by ablution and prayer, the Sikhs comb their beards and hair with peculiar care. Mounting their horses they ride forth towards the enemy with whom they engage in a continual skirmish, advancing and retiring until men and horses are equally tired. They then draw off for a distance from the enemy, until meeting with cultivated ground they permit their horses to graze, whilst they parch a little grain for themselves. After satisfying nature in this frugal manner they renew the skirmishing if the enemy is near. Should he have retreated they follow up and renew these tactics.&lt;br&gt;Seldom indulging in the comforts of a tent whilst in the enemy’s country, the repast of a Sikh cannot be supposed to be either sumptuous or elegant. Seated on the ground with a mat spread before them, a Bramin appointed for the purpose serves out a portion of food to each person, the cakes of flour which they eat during the meal serving them in the room of plates and dishes. Accustomed from their earliest infancy to a life of hardship and difficulty, the Sikh despises the comforts of a tent. In lieu of this, each horseman is furnished with two blankets, one for himself, and one for the horse.&lt;br&gt;These blankets, which are placed beneath the saddle, and a grain bag and heel rope, comprise in war the whole baggage of a Sikh. Their cooking utensils are carried on ponies. Considering this mode of life and the extraordinary rapidity of their marches, it cannot be a wonder if they perform marches, which to those accustomed only to European warfare, must seem incredible.
**(a) George Thomas (1781-1802), an adventurer at feud with the Sikh  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*They move about constantly, armed to the teeth, and it is not an uncommon thing to see them riding about with a drawn sword in each hand, two more in their belt, a matchlock at their back, and three or four pair of quoits fastened round their turbans. The quoit is an arm peculiar to this race of people; it is a steel ring, varying from six to nine inches in diameter, and about an inch in breadth, very thin, and the edges ground very sharp…Runjeet Sing has done much towards reducing these people to a state of subjection, (though they are still very troublesome,) by breaking up the large bands of them that were accustomed to congregate in all parts of the Punjab. He has raised some irregular regiments composed entirely of Akalees, which he always employs on any dangerous or desperate service; and as they fight like devils, he continues to make them useful, as well as to expend a great number of them in this way. In 1815, when the Maharajah’s army was investing the city of Moultan, the Affghans made so protracted and determined a defence, that Runjeet Sing was induced to offer very advantageous terms, compared to what he was in the habit of doing under similar circumstances; and during the progress of the negotiations, an Akalee, named Sadhoo Sing, with a few companions, advanced to the fausse braye, and without orders, in one of their fits of enthusiasm, attacked the Affghans, who were sleeping or careless on their watch, and killed every man; the Sihk army took advantage of the opportunity, and rushing on, in two hours carried the citadel, Muzuffer Khan and his four sons being all cut down in the gateway, after a gallant defence.
** The Akalis, W.G. Osborne  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*The Seiks received Proselytes of almost every Cast, a point in which they differ most materially from the Hindoos…They have forbid absolutely the use of the Hookah, but they are as liberal in the use of Bang, and Ophiam, as their Neighbours. They are not prohibited the use of animal food of any kind, excepting Beef, which they are rigidly scrupulous in abstaining from. They never shave either Head or Beard; They sometimes wear yellow, but the prevailing Colour of their Cloaths is deep blue; They make their Turbans capaciously large, over which they frequently wear a piece of pliable Iron Chain or Net work [an early reference to the Sikh turban known as dastar bunga or the turban fortress].
** Every day receive proselytes, John Griffith [chief of the Surat factory and briefly Governor of Bombay], in 1791  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*A Sikh wishing to become a Singh, must go though the ceremonies of the institution at this temple [Akal Takht]. It is, however, only the more indigent description of them who apostatize, and generally those who are fed by priests. Although no person can visit the temple without paying, on the first admission, a sum of money to the priests, who divide it equally among themselves, yet they are by no means avaricious; the monies so collected, being expanded on their personal wants, given in charity, or laid out in erecting additional buildings; and there is no instance of an Akalee’s accumulating money for any other purpose. Choirs of singers assemble at three o’clock every morning, and chaunt their canticles by reliefs, during the day, and till late at night, in the temple; and at two or three other sacred spots, and with great solemnity, thus exciting to religious veneration and awe, and raising the soul to heavenly contemplation. Although the priests are held in the greatest reverence, still you are not to suppose that they are entirely exempt from every vice…. The concourse of fine women who go to bathe at the temple in the morning is prodigious. The individuals composing this groupe of beauty, are far superior in the elegance of their persons, the symmetry of their forms, and the fine traits of countenance, to the generality of the lower Hindoostanees. The Birakees, (or fine singers) as they are here called, are composed of handsome young women, Mooslimas, but are by no means superior either in their singing or dancing to the nautch sets of other parts of Hindoostan; they are, however, much better dressed, and many of them appear decorated with gold and silver ornaments, to a considerable amount. The Singhs being greatly devoted to pleasure, give every encouragement to the nautch girls. Their songs are chiefly in the Punjab dialect, which is performed as being better understood than the Persian or Hindoostanee, but to an European ear, they are by no means so pleasing, being full of discordant, inharmonious tones.
** Initiation ceremony; from the manuscript notes of an officer of the Bengal Army [Asiatic Annual Register, vol. X1, for the Year 1809  quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3

*They told me further, that some years after this book of Naneek Shah had been promulgated, another made its appearance, now held in almost as much esteem as the former. The name of the author has escaped my memory; but they favoured me with an extract from the book itself in praise of the Deity. The passage had struck my ear on my first entering the hall, when the students were all engaged in reading. From the familiarity of the language to the Hindoovee, and many Shanscrit words, I was able to understand a good deal of it, and I hope, at some future period, to have the honour of laying a translation of it before the Society.
** The Dasam Granth, Charles Wilkins on a visit to the Takht at Patna in 1781 quoted from Jain, M. (editor) (2011). The India they saw: Foreign accounts. New Delhi: Ocean Books. Volume IV Chapter3
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Sikhism]]
[[Category:Sikhs]]</text>
      <sha1>l6iakn8hsurtmjdttmv7jf0c8z8ldg6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Fictional last words in The Swan Princess media</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>158871</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965156</id>
      <parentid>3959087</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:29:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-31994-37</username>
        <id>3332129</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965156</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1310" sha1="ghfih556xds64kqkmal130tx739rwns" xml:space="preserve">{{mergeto|The Swan Princess&lt;!-- all from a single film --&gt;}}
**Source: ''[[The Swan Princess]]'' (1994)
*'''Only if you defeat me.'''
**Who: Rothbart
**Source: ''[[The Swan Princess]]'' (1994)
**Note: Rothbart transforms into Bat, and Prince Derek killed him by shooting an arrow bow quiver hurt into his heart and sent him plunging into Swan Lake, splash magic blast exploding. Striking pain his chest?
*'''Bye-bye, Birdie!'''
**Who: Knuckles 
**Source: ''[[The Swan Princess: Escape from Castle Mountain]]'' (1997)
**Note: Before Derek cuts the rope holding the gondola up to swing on it and sent Knuckles falling into the lava.
*'''NOOOO!!!!!!!'''
**Who: Clavius
**Source: ''[[The Swan Princess: Escape from Castle Mountain]]'' (1997) 
**Note: as the orb from the Forbidden Arts crashes onto the floor and causes the entire mountain to erupt massive amounts of molten lava. The eruption kills Clavius while Prince Derek, Princess Odette and the others escape using Clavius' hot air balloon. 
*'''Traitor!''' 
**Who: Zelda
**Source: ''[[The Swan Princess III: The Mystery of the Enchanted Treasure]]'' (1998)
**Note: Before Prince Derek breaks her wand and pushes her into the fire trap she created to imprison Princess Odette in and destroyed her completely.

[[Category:Fictional last words|Swan Princess]]</text>
      <sha1>ghfih556xds64kqkmal130tx739rwns</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Matt Ridley</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>161620</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965165</id>
      <parentid>3692650</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:02:15Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Markjoseph125</username>
        <id>19526</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* The Red Queen (1993) */</comment>
      <origin>3965165</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43563" sha1="g4lja9548l0suvfzgk5z6dx5gveiqb6" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Official portrait of Viscount Ridley crop 2.jpg|thumb|Matt Ridley in 2018]]
'''[[w:Matt Ridley|Matthew White Ridley, 5th Viscount Ridley]]''', [[w:Deputy lieutenant|DL]], [[w:Royal Society of Literature#Fellows|FRSL]], [[w:Fellow of the Academy of Medical Sciences|FMedSci]] (born [[7 February]] [[1958]]), usually known as '''Matt Ridley''', is a British journalist who has written several popular science books. He is also a businessman and a [[Conservative Party (UK)|Conservative]] member of the [[House of Lords]].

== Quotes ==
=== ''[[w:The Red Queen: Sex and the Evolution of Human Nature|The Red Queen]]'' (1993) ===
&lt;small&gt; All quotes from the American trade paperback edition, published in 2003 by Harper Perennial, {{ISBN|978-0-06-055657-0}}, 24th printing &lt;/small&gt;&lt;br&gt;
&lt;small&gt; Italics as in the book. Bold face added for emphasis. &lt;/small&gt;

* I know of no other way that human nature can have developed except by evolution, and there is now overwhelming evidence that there is no other way for evolution to work except by competitive reproduction. Those strains that reproduce persist; those that do not reproduce die out.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (pp. 4-5)

* Everything can be inherited except sterility. None of your direct ancestors died childless. Consequently, if we are to understand how human nature evolved, the very core of our inquiry must be reproduction, for reproductive success is the examination that all human genes must pass if they are not to be squeezed out by natural selection. Hence I am going to argue that there are very few features of the human psyche and nature that can be understand without reference to reproduction. I begin with sexuality itself. 
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 5)

* Reproducing sexually must improve an individual’s reproductive success or else sex would not persist. It is increasingly hard to understand how human beings came to be so clever without considering sexual competition.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (pp. 5-6)

* '''The idea that we were designed by our past was the principal insight of Charles Darwin. He was the first to realize that you can abandon divine creation of species without abandoning the argument from design.''' Every living thing is “designed” quite unconsciously by the selective reproduction of its own ancestors to suit a particular life-style.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 6)

* The study of human nature must have profound implications for the study of history, sociology, psychology, anthropology, and politics. Each of those disciplines is an attempt to understand [[human behavior]], and if the underlying universals of human behavior are the product of evolution, then it is vitally important to understand what the evolutionary pressures were.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 7)

* '''I have gradually come to realize that almost all of social science proceeds as if 1859, the year of the publication of the ''Origin of Species,'' had never happened; it does so quite deliberately, for it insists that human culture is a product of our own free will and invention. Society is not the product of human psychology, it asserts, but vice versa.&lt;br&gt;That sounds reasonable enough, and it would be splendid for those who believe in social engineering if it were true, but is is simply not true.'''
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 7)

* We assume, and rightly that a Russian is just as human after two generations of oppressive totalitarianism as his grandfather was before him. But why, then, does social science proceed as if it were not the case, as if people’s natures are the products of their societies?
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 8)

* '''There is, therefore, such a thing as a universal human nature, common to all people.'''
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 10)

* Just as human nature is the same everywhere, so it is recognizably the same as it was in the past.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 10)

* In behavior, as in appearance, every human individual is unique.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 12)

* It is no harder to explain than a game of cards. There are aces and kings and twos and threes in any deck of cards. A lucky player is dealt a high-scoring hand, but none of his cards is unique. Elsewhere in the room are others with the same kinds of cards in their hands. But even with just thirteen kinds of cards, every hand is different and some are spectacularly better than others. Sex is merely the dealer, generating unique hands from the same monotonous deck of genetic cards shared by the whole species.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 13)

* People are attracted to people of high reproductive and genetic potential—the healthy, the fit, and the powerful. The consequences of this fact, which goes under the name of sexual selection, are bizarre in the extreme.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 14)

* When a neo-Darwinian asks, “Why?” he is really asking “How did this come about?” He is a historian.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 17)

* One of the peculiar features of history is that time always erodes advantage. Every invention sooner or later leads to a counterinvention. Every success contains the seeds of its own overthrow. Every hegemony comes to an end. Evolutionary history is no different.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 17)

* In history, and in evolution, progress is always a futile, Sisyphean struggle to stay in the same relative place by getting ever better at things. Cars move through the congested streets of London no faster than horse-drawn carriages did a century ago.
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 18)

* Breeding, in sexual species, consists of finding an appropriate partner and persuading it to part with a package of genes. This goal is so central to life that it has influenced the design not only of the body but of the psyche. '''Simply put, anything that increases reproductive success will spread at the expense of anything that does not—even if it threatens survival.'''
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (p. 20)

* The more competitive nature of men is a consequence of sexual selection. Men have evolved to live dangerously because success in competition or battle used to lead to more or better sexual conquests and more surviving children. Women who live dangerously merely put at risk those children they already have. Likewise, the intimate connection between female beauty and female reproductive potential (beautiful women are almost by definition young and healthy; compared with older women, they are therefore both more fertile and have a longer reproductive life ahead of them) is a consequence of sexual selection acting on both men’s psyches and women’s bodies. Each sex shapes the other. Women have hourglass-shaped bodies because men have preferred them that way. Men have an aggressive nature because women have preferred them that way (or have allowed aggressive men to defeat other men in contests over women—it amounts to the same thing).
** Chapter 1, ''Human Nature'' (pp. 20-21)

* Below the surface of every banality and cliché there lies irony, cynicism, and profundity.
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (p. 27)

* I asked John Maynard Smith, one of the first people to pose the question “Why sex?,” whether he still thought some new explanation was needed. “No. We have the answers. We cannot agree on them, that is all.”
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (p. 29)

* Sex is recombination plus outcrossing; their mixing of genes is its principal feature….So sex equals genetic mixing.
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (p. 30; ellipsis represents the elision of details for the sake of continuity)

* Evolution is something that happens to organisms. It is a directionless process that sometimes make’s an animal’s descendants more complicated, sometimes simpler, and sometimes changes them not at all. We are so steeped in notions of progress and self-improvement that we find it strangely hard to accept this. But nobody has told the coelacanth, a fish that lives off Madagascar and looks exactly like its ancestors of 300 million years ago, that it has broken some law by not “evolving.” 
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (p. 31)

* Evolving is not a goal but a means to solving a problem. 
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (p. 31)

* Psychologists sometimes wonder why people are endowed with the ability to learn the part of Hamlet or understand calculus when neither skill was of much use to mankind in the primitive conditions where his intellect was shaped. Einstein would probably have been as hopeless as anybody in working out how to catch a woolly rhinoceros. Nicholas Humphrey, a Cambridge psychologist, was the first to see clearly the solution to this puzzle. We use our intellects not to solve practical problems, but to outwit each other. Deceiving people, detecting deceit, understanding people’s motives, manipulating people—these are what the intellect is used for. So what matters is not how clever and crafty you are, but how much cleverer and craftier than other people. The value of intellect is infinite. Selection within the species is always going to be more important than selection between the species.
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (pp. 33-34)

* But as we shall see, the appearance is misleading. Animal altruism is a myth. Even in the most spectacular cases of selflessness it turns out that animals are serving the selfies interests of their own genes—if sometimes being careless with their bodies.
** Chapter 2, ''The Enigma'' (p. 35)

* The things that kill animals or prevent them from reproducing are only rarely physical factors. Far more often other creatures are involved—parasites, predators, and competitors.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (p. 65)

* Parasites provide exactly the incentive to change genes every generation that sex seems to demand. The success of the genes that defended you so well in the last generation may be the best of reasons to abandon the same gene combinations in the next. By the time the next generation comes around, the parasites will have surely evolved an answer to the defense that worked best in the last generation. It is a bit like sport. In chess or in football, the tactic that proves most effective is soon the one that people learn easily to block. Every innovation in attack is soon countered by another in defense.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (p. 67)

* Computer viruses have since become a worldwide problem. It begins to look as if parasites are inevitable in any system of life.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (p. 69)

* He (Thomas Ray) had discovered that the notion of a host-parasite arms race is one of the most basic and unavoidable consequences of evolution.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (p. 70)

* The longer your generation time, the more genetic mixing you need to combat your parasites.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (p. 71)

* Parasites invent new keys; hosts change the locks. There is an obvious group-selectionist argument here for sex: At any one time a sexual species will have lots of different locks; members of an asexual one will all have the same locks. So the parasite with the right key will quickly exterminate the asexual species but not the sexual one. Hence the well-known fact: By turning our fields over to monocultures of increasingly inbred strains of wheat and maize, we are inviting the very epidemics of disease that can only be fought by the pesticides we are forced to use in ever larger quantities.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (pp. 71-72)

* Sex keeps the parasite guessing.
** Chapter 3, ''The Power of Parasites'' (p. 83)

* '''A gene is by definition the descendant of a gene that was good at getting into future generations.'''
** Chapter 4, ''Genetic Mutiny and Gender'' (p. 93)

* Wherever you look in the historical record, the elites favored sons more than other classes….Lower down the social scale, daughters are preferred even today.
** Chapter 4, ''Genetic Mutiny and Gender'' (p. 126; ellipsis represents the elision of examples)

* The process of choosing somebody to have sex with, which used to be known as falling in love, is mysterious, cerebral, and highly selective.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 132)

* The sex that invests the least has time to spare to seek other mates. Therefore, broadly speaking, males invest less and seek quantity of mates, while females invest more and seek quality of mates.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 133)

* In species where the females get nothing useful from their mates, they seem to choose on aesthetic criteria alone.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 134)

* Sexual selection theory suggests that much of the behavior and some of the appearance of an animal is adapted not to help it survive but to help it to acquire the best or the most mates.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 134)

* Females choose; their choosiness is inherited; they prefer exaggerated ornaments; exaggerated ornaments are a burden to males. That much is now uncontroversial. Thus far Darwin was right.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 138)

* It is hardly surprising to find that the males best at seduction tend to be the best at other things as well; it does not prove that females are seeking good genes for their offspring.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 147)

* Advertising works. Brand names are better known if they are advertised with sexy or alluring pictures, and better-known brands sell better. Why does it work? Because the price the consumer would have to pay in ignoring the subliminal message is just too high. It is better to be fooled into buying the second-best ice cream than go to the bother of educating yourself to resist the salesmanship.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 158)

* As every bird-watcher knows, the beauty of a bird’s song is inversely correlated with the colorfulness of its plumage.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 163)

* Such “habituation” is just a property of the way brains work; our senses, and those of grackles, notice novelty and change, not steady states. The female preference did not evolve: it just is that way.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 165)

* If females have an existing aesthetic preference, it is only logical that males will evolve to exploit that preference.
** Chapter 5, ''The Peacock’s Tale'' (p. 165)

* Human beings are a product of evolution as much as any slime mold, and the revolution of the last two decades in the way scientists now think about evolution has immense implications for mankind as will. To summarize the argument so far, evolution is more about reproduction of the fittest than survival of the fittest; every creature on earth is the product of a series of historical battles between parasites and hosts, between genes and other genes, between members of the same species, between members of one gender in competitions for members of the other gender. Those battles include psychological ones, to manipulate and exploit other members of the species; they are never won, for success in one generation only ensures that the foes of the next generation are fitter to fight harder. Life is a Sisyphean race, run ever faster toward a finish line that is merely the start of the next race.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 174)

* '''There is no nature that exists devoid of nurture; there is no nurture that develops without nature. To say otherwise is like saying that the area of a field is determined by its length but not its width. Every behavior is the product of an instinct trained by experience.'''
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 175)

* The fifth method (that is, of analyzing human mating systems) is to compare mankind with other animals that share our highly social habits: with colonial birds, monkeys, and dolphins. As we shall see, the lesson they teach is that we are designed for a system of monogamy plagued by adultery.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 176)

* Humanity shares this profile of ardent, polygamist males and coy, faithful females with about 99 percent of all animal species, including our closest relatives, the apes.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 178)

* And in the matter of seduction itself, once more it is the male who is expected to make the first move. Women may flirt, but men pounce.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 178)

* Women cannot increase their fecundity by taking more mates; men can.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 179)

* '''In any case, no moral conclusions of any kind can be drawn from evolution.'''
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 180)

* I am trying to describe the nature of humans, not prescribe their morality. That something is natural does not make it right.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 181)

* Nature is not inflexible but malleable. Moreover, the most natural thing of all about evolution is that some natures will be pitted against others. Evolution does not lead to Utopia. It leads to a land in which what is best for a man may be the worst for another man, or what is best for a woman may be the worst for a man.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 181)

* And even where I am wrong about human nature, I am not wrong that there is such a nature to be sought.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 181)

* The technological problems of suburban life may be a million miles from those of the Pleistocene savanna, but the human ones are not.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 193)

* Power seeking is characteristic of all social mammals.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 195)

* If reproduction has been the reward and goal of power and wealth, then it is little wonder that it has also been a frequent cause and rewarding of violence.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 202)

* Monogamy, enforced by law, religion, or sanction, does seem to reduce murderous competition between men.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 202)

* One of the legacies of being an ape is intergroup violence.
** Chapter 6, ''Polygamy and the Nature of Men'' (p. 203)

* By describing adultery as a force that shaped our mating system, I am not “justifying” it. Nothing is more “natural” than people evolving the tendency to object to being cuckolded or cheated on, so if my analysis were to be interpreted as justifying adultery, it would be even more obviously interpreted as justifying the social and legal mechanisms for discouraging adultery. What I am claiming is that adultery and its disapproval are both “natural.”
** Chapter 7, ''Monogamy and the Nature of Women'' (p. 219)

* Jealousy is a “human universal,” and no culture lacks it, Despite the best efforts of anthropologists to find a society with no jealousy and so prove that it is an emotion introduced by pernicious social pressure or pathology, sexual jealousy seems to be an unavoidable part of being a human being.
** Chapter 7, ''Monogamy and the Nature of Women'' (pp. 235-236)

* Wealth and power are means to women; women are means to genetic eternity….Men are to be exploited as providers of parental care, wealth, and genes.&lt;br&gt;Cynical? Not half as cynical as most accounts of human history.
** Chapter 7, ''Monogamy and the Nature of Women'' (p. 244; ellipsis represents the elision of details for the sake of continuity)

* Men and women have different bodies. The differences are the direct result of evolution. Women’s bodies evolved to suit the demands of bearing and rearing children and of gathering plant food. Men’s bodies evolved to suit the demands of rising in a male hierarchy, fighting over women, and providing meat to a family.&lt;br&gt;Men and women have different minds. The differences are the direct result of evolution. Women’s minds evolved to suit the demands of bearing and rearing children and of gathering plant food. Men’s minds evolved to suit the demands of rising in a male hierarchy, fighting over women, and providing meat to a family.&lt;br&gt;The first paragraph is banal; the second inflammatory. The proposition that men and women have evolved different minds is anathema to every social scientist and politically correct individual. Yet I believe it to be true for two reasons. First, the logic is impeccable….Second, the evidence is overwhelming.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (pp. 247-248; ellipsis represents the elision of details for the sake of continuity)

* These concerns (that is, about differences being used to justify unequal treatment) are fair. '''But just because people have exaggerated sexual differences in the past does not mean they cannot exist. There is no a priori reason for assuming that men and women have identical minds and no amount of wishing it were so will make it so if it is not so. Difference is not inequality.'''
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 249)

* We give boys tractors and girls dolls. We are reinforcing  the stereotypical obsessions that they already have, but we are not creating them.&lt;br&gt;This is something every parent knows. Despairingly they watch their son turns every stick into a sword or gun, while their daughter cuddles even the most inanimate object as if it were a doll.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 256)

* These facts have been first disputed and then actively suppressed by the educational establishment, which continues to insist that there are no differences in learning ability between boys and girls.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 257)

* There is a contradiction at the heart of feminism, one that few feminists have acknowledged. You cannot say, first, that men and women are equally capable of all jobs and, second, that if jobs were done by women, they would be done differently.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 261)

* Differences cannot be appealed to when they suit and denied when they do not.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 261)

* Without this evolutionary history in mind, it is impossible to explain the different sexual mentalities of men and women.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 266)

* Anthropology consists of studying the differences between peoples. But this has led anthropologists to exaggerate the motes of racial difference and to ignore the beams of similarity.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 275)

* The stuff of anthropology—the traditions, the myths, the crafts, the language, the rituals—is to me but the froth on the surface. Beneath lie giant themes of humanity that are the same everywhere and that are characteristically male and female. To a Martian an anthropologist studying the differences between races would seem like a farmer studying the differences between each of the wheat plants in his field. The Martian is much more interested in the typical wheat plant. It is the human universals, not the differences, that are truly intriguing.
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 275)

* '''Wishful thinking that they are the same will be mere propaganda and no favor to either sex.'''
** Chapter 8, ''Sexing the Mind'' (p. 276)

* Beauty is not arbitrary.
** Chapter 9, ''The Uses of Beauty'' (p. 280)

* Morality is never based upon nature.
** Chapter 10, ''The Intellectual Chess Game'' (p. 316)

* In the 1970s a few brave “sociobiologists” began to ask why, if other animals had evolved natures, humans would be exempt. They were vilified by the social science establishment and told to go back to ant-watching. Yet the question they had asked has not gone away.&lt;br&gt;The principal reason for the hostility to sociobiology was that it seem to justify prejudice. This was simply a confusion. Genetic theories of racism, or classism or any kind of ism, have nothing in common with the notion that there is a universal, instinctive human nature. Indeed, they are fundamentally opposed because one believes in universals and the other in racial or class particulars.
** Chapter 10, ''The Intellectual Chess Game'' (p. 319)

* Sexual selection, as we have seen, is very different from natural selection in its effects, for it does not solve survival problems, it makes them worse.
** Chapter 10, ''The Intellectual Chess Game'' (pp. 338-339)

* And I end with one of the strangest of the consequences of sex: that the choosiness of human beings in picking their mates has driven the human mind into a history of frenzied expansion for no reason except that wit, virtuosity, inventiveness, and individuality turn other people on. It is a somewhat less uplifting perspective on the purpose of humanity than the religious one, but it is also rather liberating. Be different.
** Chapter 10, ''The Intellectual Chess Game'' (p. 344)

* The Western cultural revolution that calls itself political correctness will no doubt stifle inquiries it does not like, such as those into the mental differences between men and women. I sometimes feel that we are fated never to understand ourselves because part of our nature is to turn every inquiry into an expression of our own nature: ambitious, illogical, manipulative, and religious.
** Epilogue, ''The Self-Domesticated Ape'' (p. 349)

=== ''[[w:Genome (book)|Genome]]'' (1999) ===
&lt;small&gt; All quotes from the trade paperback edition, published in October 2000 by Perennial, {{ISBN|0-06-093290-2}}, 1st printing &lt;/small&gt;

* I think knowledge is a blessing, not a curse. This is especially true in the case of genetic knowledge.
** Foreward (p. 3)

* There are genes that have not changed much since the very first single-celled creatures populated the primeval ooze. There are genes that were developed when our ancestors were worm-like. There are genes that must have first appeared when our ancestors were fish. There are genes that exist in their present form only because of recent epidemics of disease. And there are genes that can be used to write the history of human migrations in the last few thousand years. From four billion years ago to just a few hundred years ago, the genome has been a sort of autobiography for our species, recording the important events as they occurred.
** Introduction (p. 5)

* If I read the genome out to you at the rate of one word per second for eight hours a day, it would take me a century. If I wrote out the human genome, one letter per millimetre, my text would be as long as the River Danube. This is a gigantic document, an immense book, a recipe of extravagant length, and it all fits inside the microscopic nucleus of a tiny cell that fits easily upon the head of a pin.
** Introduction (p. 7)

* Almost everything in the body, from hair to hormones, is either made of proteins or made by them.
** Introduction (p. 9)

* Human beings accumulate about one hundred mutations per generation.
** Introduction (p. 10)

* All rules have exceptions (including this one).
** Introduction (p. 10)

* Life is a slippery thing to define, but it consists of two very different skills: the ability to replicate, and the ability to create order.
** Chapter 1 “Life” (p. 12)

* That life is chemistry is true but boring, like saying that football is physics.
** Chapter 1 “Life” (p. 15)

* Life consists of the interplay of two kinds of chemicals: proteins and DNA.
** Chapter 1 “Life” (p. 17)

* This means—and religious people might find this a useful argument—that there was only one creation, one single event when life was born. Of course, that life might have been born on a different planet and seeded here by spacecraft, or there might even have been thousands of kinds of life at first, but only [[w:Last universal common ancestor|Luca]] survived in the ruthless free-for-all of the primeval soup. But until the genetic code was cracked in the 1960s, we did not know what we now know: that all life is one; seaweed is your distant cousin and anthrax one of your advanced relatives. The unity of life is an empirical fact. Erasmus Darwin was outrageously close to the mark: ‘One and the same kind of living filaments has been the cause of all organic life.’
** Chapter 1 “Life” (p. 22)

* The pope notwithstanding, the human species is by no means the pinnacle of evolution. Evolution has no pinnacle and there is no such thing as evolutionary progress.
** Chapter 2 “Species” (p. 24)

* Human beings are of course unique. They have, perched between their ears, the most complicated biological machine on the planet. But complexity is not everything, and it is not the goal of evolution. Every species on the planet is unique. Uniqueness is a commodity in oversupply.
** Chapter 2 “Species” (p. 25)

* There is no bone in the chimpanzee body that I do not share. There is no known chemical in the chimpanzee brain that cannot be found in the human brain. There is no known part of the immune system, the digestive system, the vascular system, the lymph system or the nervous system that we have and chimpanzees do not, or vice versa.
** Chapter 2 “Species” (p. 29)

* It was this division of labour among specialists, unique to our species, that was the key to our ecological success, because it allowed the growth of technology.
** Chapter 2 “Species” (pp. 34-35)

* In other words, a record of our past is etched into our genes.
** Chapter 2 “Species” (p. 35)

* Genes are recipes for both anatomy and behaviour.
** Chapter 2 “Species” (p. 37)

* A month after the Watson-Crick structure was published, Britain crowned a new queen and a British expedition conquered Mount Everest on the same day. Apart from a small piece in the ''News Chronicle,'' the double helix did not make the newspapers. Today most scientists consider it the most momentous discovery of the century, if not the millennium.
** Chapter 3 “History” (p. 50)

* No horoscope matches this accuracy. No theory of human causality, Freudian, Marxist, Christian or animist, has ever been so precise. No prophet in the Old Testament, no entrail-gazing oracle in ancient Greece, no crystal-ball gipsy clairvoyant on the pier at Bognor Regis ever pretended to tell people exactly when their lives would fall apart, let alone got it right. We are dealing here with a prophecy of terrifying, cruel and inflexible truth.
** Chapter 4 “Fate” (p. 56; referring to the gene that carries [[w:Huntington's disease|Huntington's disease]])

* No study of the causes of intelligence has failed to find a substantial heritability.
** Chapter 6 “Intelligence” (p. 82)

* But the astonishing result (of IQ testing) is the correlation between the scores of adopted children reared together: zero. Being in the same family has no discernible effect on IQ at all.
** Chapter 6 “Intelligence” (p. 83)

* As you grow up, you gradually express your own innate intelligence and leave behind the influences stamped on you by others. You select the environments that suit your innate tendencies, rather than adjusting your innate tendencies to the environments you find yourself in. This proves two vital things: that genetic influences are not frozen at conception and that environmental influences are not inexorably cumulative. Heritability does not mean immutability.
** Chapter 6 “Intelligence” (pp. 84-85)

* In egalitarian societies, genes matter more.
** Chapter 6 “Intelligence” (p. 86)

* Nobody doubts that genes can shape anatomy. The idea that they also shape behaviour takes a lot more swallowing.
** Chapter 7 “Instinct” (p. 91)

* No matter that the social sciences set about reinventing much more alarming forms of determinism to take the place of the genetic form: the parental determinism of Freud; the socio-economic determinism of Marx; the political determinism of Lenin; the peer-pressure cultural determinism of Franz Boas and Margaret Mead; the stimulus-response determinism of John Watson and B. F. Skinner; the linguistic determinism of Edward Sapir and Benjamin Whorf. In one of the great diversions of all time, for nearly a century social scientists managed to persuade thinkers of many kinds that biological causality was determinism while environmental causality preserved free will; and that animals had instincts, but human beings did not.
** Chapter 7 “Instinct” (p. 92)

* The conclusions of both behaviour genetics and evolutionary psychology remain distinctly unpalatable to many non-scientists, whose main objection is a superficially reasonable argument from incredulity. How can a gene, a stretch of DNA ‘letters’, cause a behaviour? What conceivable mechanism could link a recipe for a protein with an ability to learn the rule for making the past tense in English? I admit that this seems at first sight a mighty leap, requiring more faith than reason. But it need not be, because the genetics of behaviour is, at root, no different from the genetics of embryonic development…The idea of genes for behaviour is no more strange than the idea of genes for development. Both are mind-boggling, but nature has never found human incomprehension a reason for changing her methods.
** Chapter 7 “Instinct” (p. 106; ellipsis represents a brief elision)

* If you still thought evolution was about the good of the species, stop thinking so right now.
** Chapter X and Y “Conflict” (p. 113)

* Sexual relations are driven not by what is good, in evolutionary terms, for men or for women, but for their chromosomes. The ability to seduce a woman was good for Y chromosomes in the past; the ability to resist seduction by a man was good for X chromosomes in the past.
** Chapter X and Y “Conflict” (p. 115)

* The genome is littered, one might almost say clogged, with the equivalent of computer viruses, selfish, parasitic stretches of letters which exist for the pure and simple reason that they are good at getting themselves duplicated. We are full of digital chain letters and warnings about marmalade.
** Chapter 8 “Self-Interest” (p. 127)

* Genes do indeed behave as if they have selfish goals, not consciously, but retrospectively: genes that behave in this way thrive and genes that don’t don’t.
** Chapter 8 “Self-Interest” (p. 128)

* Judges were never very good at science.
** Chapter 9 “Disease” (p. 136)

* The main purpose of most genes in the human genome is regulating the expression of other genes in the genome.
** Chapter 10 “Stress” (p. 150)

* It underscores yet again the fact that what we call personality is to a considerable degree a question of brain chemistry.
** Chapter 11 “Personality” (p. 172)

* The evolutionary implication is that we are descended from a common ancestor with flies which used the same way of defining the pattern of the embryo more than 530 million years ago, and that the mechanism was so good that all this dead creature’s descendants have hung on to it.
** Chapter 12 “Self-Assembly” (p. 178)

* What is true of mice is just as true of people. Flies and people are just variations on a theme of how to build a body that was laid down in some worm-like creature in the [[w:Cambrian|Cambrian]] period. They still retain the same genes doing the same job. Of course, there are differences; if there are not, we would look like flies. But the differences are surprisingly subtle.
** Chapter 12 “Self-Assembly” (p. 179)

* These two processes—linguistic philology and genetic phylogeny—are converging upon a common theme: the history of human migrations.
** Chapter 13 “Pre-History” (p. 185)

* This led to a neat generalization, which is so tidy it ought to be true and probably would be if physicists ran the world: every animal has roughly the same number of heartbeats per lifetime. An elephant lives longer than a mouse, but its pulse rate is so much slower that, measured in heartbeats, they both live lives of the same length.
** Chapter 14 “Immortality” (p. 200)

* Natural selection has designed all parts of our bodies to last just long enough to see our children into independence, no more.
** Chapter 14 “Immortality” (p. 202)

* The question is not whether nurture has a role to play, because nobody of any sense has ever gone on record as denying that it does, but whether nature has a role to play at all. When my one-year-old daughter discovered a plastic baby in a toy pram one day while I was writing this chapter, she let out the kinds of delighted squeals that her brother had reserved at the same age for passing tractors. Like many parents, I found it hard to believe that this was purely because of some unconscious social conditioning that we had imposed. Boys and girls have systematically different interests from the very beginning of autonomous behaviour.
** Chapter 15 “Sex” (p. 217)

* Held up as a proof of socially constructed gender roles, he proved the exact opposite: that nature does play a role in gender. The evidence from zoology has always pointed that way: male behaviour is systemically different from female behaviour in most species and the difference has an innate component. The brain is an organ with innate gender. The evidence from the genome, from imprinted genes and genes for sex-linked behaviours, now points to the same conclusion.
** Chapter 15 “Sex” (p. 218)

* The subject of learning lies in the provinces of neuroscience and psychology. It is the opposite of instinct. Instinct is generically-determined behaviour; learning is behaviour modified by experience.
** Chapter 16 “Memory” (p. 220)

* Just as we underestimate the degree to which human brains rely upon instincts, so we have generally underestimated the degree to which other animals are capable of learning.
** Chapter 16 “Memory” (p. 222)

* I have a hard time imagining how my memory of the meaning of the word ‘volado’ consists of some strengthened synaptic connections between a few neurons. It is distinctly mind-boggling. Yet far from having removed the mystery from the problem by reducing it to the molecular level, I feel that scientists have opened before me a new and intriguing mystery, the mystery of trying to imagine how connections between nerve cells not only provide the mechanism of memory but ''are'' memory. It is every bit as thrilling a mystery as quantum physics, and a great deal more thrilling than Ouija boards and flying saucers.
** Chapter 16 “Memory” (p. 227)

* The story of [[w:p53|p53]] and the [[w:Oncogene|oncogenes]], like much of my book, challenges the argument that genetic research is necessarily dangerous and should be curtailed. The story also strongly challenges the view that ‘reductionist’ science, which takes systems apart to understand them, is flawed and futile. Oncology, the medical study of whole cancers, diligent, brilliant and massively endowed though it was, achieved terribly little in comparison with what has already been achieved in a few years by a reductionist, genetic approach.
** Chapter 17 “Death” (p. 240)

* The politicisation of the issue has had absurd results.
** Chapter 18 “Cures” (p. 253; referring to genetic engineering)

* The fuel on which science runs is ignorance. Science is like a hungry furnace that must be fed logs from the forests of ignorance that surround us. In the process, the clearing we call knowledge expands, but the more it expands, the longer its perimeter and the more ignorance comes into view.
** Chapter 20 “Politics” (p. 271)

* A true scientist is bored by knowledge; it is the assault on ignorance that motivates him—the mysteries that previous discoveries have revealed.
** Chapter 20 “Politics” (p. 271)

* At its birth eugenics was not a politicised science; it was a science-ised political creed.
** Chapter 21 “Eugenics” (p. 288)

* In Sigmund Freud’s psychology, John Watson’s behaviourism and Margaret Mead’s anthropology, nurture-determinism by parents was never tested, only assumed. Yet the evidence, from twin studies, from the children of immigrants and from adoption studies, is now staring us in the face: people get their personalities from their genes and from their peers, not from their parents.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (pp. 305-306)

* Culture is transmitted autonomously from each children’s peer group to the next and not from parent to child—which is why, for example, the move towards greater adult sexual equality has had zero effect on willing sexual segregation in the playground. As every parent knows, children prefer to imitate peers than parents. Psychology, like sociology and anthropology, has been dominated by those with a  strong antipathy to genetic explanations; it can no longer sustain such ignorance.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (pp. 306-307)

* So there is no escape from determinism by appealing to socialization. Either effects have causes or they do not. If I’m timid because of something that happened to me when I was young, that event is no less deterministic than a gene for timidity. The greater mistake is not to equate determinism with genes, but to mistake determinism for inevitability.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (p. 307)

* Determinism looks backwards to the causes of the present state, not forward to the consequences.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (p. 307)

* Yet the myth persists that genetic determinism is a more implacable kind of fate than social determinism.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (p. 308)

* Full responsibility for one’s actions is a necessary fiction without which the law would flounder, but it is a fiction all the same. To the extent that you act in character you are responsible for your actions; yet acting in character is merely expressing the many determinisms that caused your character.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (p. 309)

* This interaction of genetic and external influences makes my behaviour unpredictable, but not undetermined.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (p. 312)

* Freedom lies in expressing your own determinism, not somebody else’s. It is not the determinism that makes a difference, but the ownership. If freedom is what we prefer, then it is preferable to be determined by forces that originate in ourselves and not in others.
** Chapter 22 “Free Will” (p. 313)

=== ''The Rational Optimist: How Prosperity Evolves'' (2010) ===
* Rational optimism holds that the world will pull out of the current crisis because of the way that markets in goods, services and ideas allow human beings to exchange and specialise honestly for the betterment of all. So this is not a book of unthinking praise or condemnation of all markets, but it is an inquiry into how the market process of exchange and specialisation is older and fairer than many think and gives a vast reason for optimism about the future of the human race. Above all, it is a book about the benefits of change. I find that my disagreement is mostly with reactionaries of all political colours: blue ones who dislike cultural change, red ones who dislike economic change and green ones who dislike technological change.
** Prologue When ideas have sex

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ridley, Matt}}
[[Category:1958 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Journalists from England]]
[[Category:Science authors]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors from England]]
[[Category:Businesspeople from England]]
[[Category:Libertarians]]
[[Category:Atheists from England]]
[[Category:Conservative Party (UK) politicians]]</text>
      <sha1>g4lja9548l0suvfzgk5z6dx5gveiqb6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Steven Universe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>174489</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965062</id>
      <parentid>3946131</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:45:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Cast */ oh GOD</comment>
      <origin>3965062</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3791" sha1="a8jjkpwatusxesb5cvewrakpvdtoxd2" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Steven Universe (season 1)|1]] [[Steven Universe (season 2)|2]] [[Steven Universe (season 3)|3]] [[Steven Universe (season 4)|4]] [[Steven Universe (season 5)|5]] | [[Steven Universe: The Movie|Film]] | [[Steven Universe Future|Future]] | [[Steven Universe: Lars of the Stars|Lars of the Stars]] | [[Steven Universe|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Steven Universe|Steven Universe]]''''' (2013–2019), also referred to as '''''Steven''''' for short, is an American animated television series created by [[w:Rebecca Sugar|Rebecca Sugar]], former storyboard artist, writer, and composer for ''[[Adventure Time]]''. It is produced by Cartoon Network Studios, and is the first show by the studio to be created by a woman. The series aired on [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] in North America from November 4, 2013 to January 21, 2019.

== Pilot ==
:'''Steven''': You're back!
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, Steven, look at this! ''[pulls out small cackling skull]''
:'''Pearl''': Whoa! What are you, crazy?! ''[knocks the skull out of Amethyst's hand and stomps it]''
:'''Steven''': What the heck was that?!
:'''Pearl''': An Electric Skull, our Crystal Palace was swarming with them.
:'''Amethyst''': They were after this. ''[takes out an hourglass from her fanny pack]''
:'''Steven''': ''[entranced]'' Can I see that?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, sure.
:'''Pearl''': ''[interrupts]'' No! It’s extremely powerful, we shouldn't have even brought it home.
:'''Steven''': Garnet! Tell Pearl to let me see the thing! ''[Garnet puts finger to his lips]''
:'''Garnet''': Shh...
:'''Steven''': Aw, man! I wanna come next time! I even wrote us a song. ''[takes out ukulele]'' It’s like: ''If you’re—'' W-wait, hold on. Hmm... ''[tunes ukulele, singing]''
:''If you're evil and you're on the rise''
:''You can count on the four of us taking you down'' 
:'''Cause we're good and evil never beats us''
:''We'll win the fight and then go out for pizzas.''

:''We... are the Crystal Gems''
:''We'll always save the day''
:''And if you think we can't''
:''We'll always find a way.''

:''That's why the people of this world... believe in''
:''Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl... and Steven!''

== Seasons ==
::[[Steven Universe (season 1)|Season 1]]
::[[Steven Universe (season 2)|Season 2]]
::[[Steven Universe (season 3)|Season 3]]
::[[Steven Universe (season 4)|Season 4]]
::[[Steven Universe (season 5)|Season 5]]

== Film ==
::[[Steven Universe: The Movie]]

== Sequel Series ==
::[[Steven Universe Future]]
== Video Games==

===''[[Steven Universe: Save The Light]]''===

===''[[Steven Universe: Unleash the Light]]''===


== Cast ==
* [[w:Zach Callison|Zach Callison]] – Steven Universe
* [[w:Estelle (musician)|Estelle]] – Garnet
* [[w:Michaela Dietz|Michaela Dietz]] – Amethyst
* [[w:Deedee Magno|Deedee Lynn Magno]] – Pearl
* [[w:Tom Scharpling|Tom Scharpling]] – Greg Universe
* Grace Rolek – Connie Maheswaran
* [[w:Shelby Rabara|Shelby Rabara]] – Peridot
* [[w:Jennifer Paz|Jennifer Paz]] – Lapis Lazuli
* [[w:Charlyne Yi|Charlyne Yi]] - Ruby
* [[w:Erica Luttrell|Erica Luttrell]] - Sapphire
* [[w:Kimberly Brooks|Kimberly Brooks]] - Jasper
* [[w:Susan Egan|Susan Egan]] – Rose Quartz/Pink Diamond
* [[w:Patti LuPone|Patti LuPone]] - Yellow Diamond
* [[w:Lisa Hannigan|Lisa Hannigan]] - Blue Diamond
* [[w:Nicki Minaj|Nicki Minaj]] - Sugilite

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}} 
* {{imdb title|3061046|Steven Universe}}
* [http://www.cartoonnetwork.com/video/steven-universe/index.html Website] &lt;!-- The official show website would be a good choice here. --&gt;
* [http://animatedtv.about.com/od/cartoons-q-z/fl/Steven-Universe.htm TV Show Summary]
{{Authority control}}

[[Category:Steven Universe| ]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>a8jjkpwatusxesb5cvewrakpvdtoxd2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>RWBY</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>175072</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965153</id>
      <parentid>3964013</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:13:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39075-05</username>
        <id>3348841</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Of Solitude and Self [Volume 9, Episode 10] */</comment>
      <origin>3965153</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="173803" sha1="k5wd0fn7s7iub71i7l4ge80zhaibr40" xml:space="preserve">{{tv-cleanup}}
[[File:Team RWBY Volume 9.png|thumb]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:RWBY|RWBY]]'''''  (pronounced &quot;Ruby&quot;) is an American Anime inspired web series that was created by [[w:Monty Oum|Monty Oum]] for [[w:Rooster Teeth|Rooster Teeth Productions]]. If you are unable to find the quote you are looking for, a user-created transcript searcher is available [https://glqv.bitbucket.io/rwby/quotes/ here.]

== Dialogue ==

== Volume 1 ==
===Ruby Rose [Volume 1, Episode 1]===

:'''Ozpin''': So...''[He and Goodwitch look at footage of Ruby fighting off several of Torchwick's henchmen]'' Where did you learn to do this?
:'''Ruby''': S-Signal Academy.
:'''Ozpin''': They taught you to use one of the most dangerous weapons ever designed?
:'''Ruby''': Well, one teacher in particular.
:'''Ozpin''': I see...''[Puts a plate of cookies on the table in front of Ruby. Ruby hesitantly eats one, looks at Ozpin, then eats more]'' It's just that I've only seen one other scythe-wielder of that skill before. A dusty, old crow.
:'''Ruby''': ''[Mumbles with a mouthful of cookies.]'' Thas ma unca Mmmf! ''[Ozpin stares at her; Ruby quickly swallows and clears her throat]'' Sorry. That's my Uncle Qrow. He's a teacher at Signal. I was complete garbage before he took me under his wing. Now, I'm all, like ''[does karate arm moves and light shouts]''
:'''Ozpin''': So I've noticed.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': I wonder who we're gonna meet.
:'''Yang''': I just hope they're better than &quot;Vomit Boy&quot;.
:'''Ruby''': Oh, Yang, gross, you have puke on your shoe!
:'''Yang''': Gross, gross, gross...
:'''Ruby''': Get away, get away! Get away from me! Get away from me! Get away from me! Get away from me!

===The Shining Beacon [Volume 1, Episode 2]===
:'''Ruby''': Hey, I said I was sorry, Princess!
:'''Blake''': It's Heiress, actually. Weiss Schnee, heiress, to the Schnee Dust Company, one of the largest producers of energy propellant in the world.
:'''Weiss''': Finally, some recognition!
:'''Blake''': The same company infamous for its controversial labor forces and questionable business partners.
:'''Weiss''': -What- How dare-!
''[Ruby started to laugh]''
:'''Weiss''': The nerve of-! ''[Weiss snatch her dust from Blake and walk away]'' Ugh!

===The Shining Beacon Pt. 2 [Volume 1, Episode 3]===
:'''Yang''': So, how's your first day going, little sister?
:'''Ruby''': You mean since you ditched me and I exploded?
:'''Yang''': Yikes, meltdown already?
:'''Ruby''': No, I literally exploded a hole in front of the school. And there was fire and I think some ice.
:'''Yang''': Are you being sarcastic?
:'''Ruby''': I wish! I tripped over some crabby girl's luggage, and then she yelled at me, and I sneezed, and then I exploded, and then she yelled again, and I felt really, really bad, and I just wanted her to stop yelling at me! ''[During this, the camera pans over to reveal Weiss standing right behind Ruby, listening the whole time]''
:'''Weiss''': YOU!
:'''Ruby''': ''[Jumps into Yang's arms]'' Oh God, it's happening again!
:'''Weiss''': You're lucky we weren't blown off the side of the cliff!
:'''Yang''': ''[Deadpan]'' Oh my God, you really exploded. 
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Ruby''': As a girl, I wanted to be just like those heroes in the books... Someone who fought for what was right, and protected people who couldn't protect themselves!
:'''Blake''': That's...very ambitious for a child. Unfortunately, the real world isn't the same as a fairy tale.
:'''Ruby''': Well, that's why we're here.  To make it better.
:'''Weiss''': What in the world is going on over here!? Don't you realize some of us are trying to sleep!? ''[After seeing it's Ruby who woke her up]''
:'''Weiss and Yang''': OH, NOT YOU AGAIN!
:'''Ruby''': Shh! Guys, she's right! People are trying to sleep!
:'''Weiss''': Oh, now you're on my side. 
:'''Ruby''': I was always on your side!
:'''Yang''': Yeah, What's your problem with my sister? She's only trying to be nice!
:'''Weiss''': She's a hazard to my health!
''[Blake blows out the candles]''

===The Emerald Forest [Volume 1, Episode 6]===
:'''Ruby''': What was that!?  That should have been easy!
:'''Weiss''': Well, perhaps, if you had used even the slightest amount of caution in the placement of your strikes, I wouldn't have set the forest on fire!
:'''Ruby''': What's that supposed to mean!?
:'''Weiss''': I'm just surprised that someone who talks so much could communicate so little during an encounter.
:'''Ruby''': Well, I'm sorry that you need my help to win a fight.  I'm just fine on my own!
:'''Weiss''': Well, congratulations on being the strongest child to sneak your way into Beacon.  Bravo.
'''Players and Pieces [Volume 1, Episode 8]'''
:'''Weiss''': ''[She and Ruby are riding on the back of a Nevermore]'' RUBY! I told you that this was a terrible idea!
:'''Ruby''': We'll be fine! Stop worrying!
:'''Weiss''': I am ''so'' beyond worrying!
:'''Ruby''': ...In a good way?
:'''Weiss''': In a BAD way! In a VERY BAD way!
:'''Ruby''': Well, why don't we just jump?
:'''Weiss''': What, are you insane?! ''[Sees Ruby has already jumped]'' Oh, you insufferable little red-!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Yang''': I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something crazy happens again?!
:'''Ruby''': Uh, Yang? ''[Points up to the sky]''
:'''Weiss''': ''[Hanging off a claw of a flying Nevermore]'' How could you leave me?!
:'''Ruby''': I said &quot;jump&quot;!
:'''Blake''': She's going to fall.
:'''Ruby''': She'll be fine.
:'''Ren''': She's falling.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Yang prepare to take down a Grimm Nevermore. Yang and Blake stretch one of Blake's ribbons between two pillars. Ruby stands on the ribbon, while Weiss uses her semblance to pull it back, like a slingshot.]''
:'''Weiss''': Of course, ''you'' would come up with this idea.
:'''Ruby''': Think you can make the shot?
:'''Weiss''': ''[Smugly]'' Hmph, can I?
:'''Ruby''': ...Can-?
:'''Weiss''': Of course I can!

===The Badge and The Burden [Volume 1, Episode 9]===

''[After Weiss wakes up, Ruby blows a whistle]''
:'''Weiss''': Gah! ''[Falls down]''
:'''Ruby''': Goooood morning, Team RWBY!
:'''Weiss''': What in the world is wrong with you?!
:'''Ruby''': Now that you're awake, we can begin our first order of business.
:'''Weiss''': Excuse me?
:'''Yang''': Decorating!
:'''Weiss''': What?
:'''Blake''': We still have to unpack...''[Holds up her suitcase, which falls open, spilling out all its contents]'' And clean.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Yang decorate and furnish their room. When they finish, they see the beds are cluttered together]''
:'''Weiss''': This...isn't going to work.
:'''Blake''': It is a bit cramped.
:'''Yang''': Maybe we should ditch some of our stuff.
:'''Ruby''': Or...we could ditch the beds ''[Gasps]'' And replace them with BUNK BEDS!
:'''Weiss''': Um, that sounds incredibly dangerous.
:'''Yang''': And super awesome!
:'''Blake''': It ''does'' seem efficient.
:'''Weiss''': Well, we should put it to a vote.
:'''Ruby''': I think we just did.
:''[Blake gives a thumbs-up, Yang gives a &quot;rock on&quot; gesture, both accompanied by a &quot;bing&quot; sound, followed by Weiss frowning, accompanied by a buzzer.]''

'''The Badge and The Burden Part 2 [Volume 1, Episode 10]'''
:''[Weiss is complaining to Professor Port about Ozpin's choice to name Ruby the team leader]''
:'''Weiss''': Excuse me?
:'''Professor Port''': I believed in Professor Ozpin for many years, and the man's never once led me astray.
:'''Weiss''': So, you would just blindly accept his decision, even after seeing how exceptional I am?
:'''Professor Port''': With all due respect, your exceptional skill on the battlefield is matched only by your poor attitude.
:'''Weiss''': How dare you!
:'''Professor Port''': My point, exactly. I see a girl who has spent her entire life getting exactly what she wanted.
:'''Weiss''': That's not even remotely true! ''[Professor Port raises an eyebrow]'' Well, not ''entirely'' true...

===Jaunedice [Volume 1, Episode 11]===
:'''Nora''': So.  There we were.  In the middle of the night!
:'''Ren''': It was day.
:'''Nora''': And we were surrounded by Ursai...
:'''Ren''': They were Beowolves.
:'''Nora''': Dozens of them!
:'''Ren''': Two of them.

===Jaunedice Part 2 [Volume 1, Episode 12]===
:'''Oobleck''': Mr. Arc! Finally contributing to class! This is excellent! Excellent! What is the answer?
:'''Jaune''': Uhh... the answer... the advantage... of the faunus... had over that guy's stuff... ''[Sees Pyrrha making a gesture]'' Uh, b-binoculars!

===Forever Fall Part 2 [Volume 1, Episode 14]===
:'''Pyrrha''': Well, Ruby has her speed, Weiss has her glyphs, my semblance is polarity.
:'''Ruby''': Whoa, you can control poles...
:'''Weiss''': No, you dunce! It means she has control over magnetism!
:'''Ruby''': Magnets are cool, too...

===The Stray [Volume 1, Episode 15]===
:'''Penny''': You call me friend. Am I really your friend?
:'''Ruby''': Ahh! ''[Then Weiss, Blake, and Yang want her to say no]'' Yeah, sure! Why not?! ''[Then they faint]''
:'''Penny''': Ahaha! Sen-sational! We can paint our nails and try out clothes and talk about cute boys!
:'''Ruby''': Ooh, is this what it was like when you met me?
''[After Weiss gets up, and brush herself]''
:'''Weiss''': No, she seems ''far'' more coordinated. 
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Weiss''': Wait, you're fighting in the tournament?
:'''Penny''': I'm combat ready!
:'''Weiss''': Forgive me, but you hardly look the part.
:'''Blake''': Says the girl wearing a dress.
:'''Weiss''': It's a combat skirt!
''[Ruby, wearing a combat skirt as well, stands next to Weiss]'' 
:'''Ruby''': Yeah! ''[She and Weiss slap hands]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Weiss''': You realize that you're defending an organization that hates humanity, don't you?  The Faunus of the White Fang are pure evil!
:'''Blake''': There's no such thing as pure evil!  Why do you think they hate humanity so much?  It's because of people like Cardin, people like ''you'' that force the White Fang to take such drastic measures!
:'''Weiss''': People like me!?
:'''Blake''': You're discriminatory!
:'''Weiss''': I'm a victim!  ''[walks to the window]''  You wanna know why I despise the White Fang?  Why I don't particularly trust the Faunus?  It's because they've been at war with my grandfather's company for years.  War as in actual bloodshed.  And as far as I could remember, the company has had a target painted on them.  Family friends kept disappearing.  Board members executed.  An entire trainload of dust stolen.  Every night, my father would come home from work, furious and that made for a very!  Difficult!  Childhood!
:'''Ruby''': Weiss, I...
:'''Weiss''': No!  You wanna know why I despise the White Fang?  It's because they are a bunch of liars!  Thieves!  And murderers!
:'''Blake''': Well, maybe we were just tired of being pushed around!

===Black and White [Volume 1, Episode 16]===
:'''Ruby''': Blaaake?!
:'''Yang''': Blaaake?!
:'''Ruby''': Blaaake?! Where are yooouuu?! 
:'''Yang''': Blake!!
:'''Ruby''': Weiss, You're not helping!
:'''Weiss''': Oh! You know who might be able to help? The police.
:'''Ruby''': Ugh. Weiss...
:'''Weiss''': It was just an idea!
:'''Ruby''': Yeah, a bad one.
:'''Yang''': Weiss, I think we should hear her side of the story before we jump to any conclusions.
:'''Weiss''': I think when we hear it, you'll all realize I was right.
:'''Penny''': And I think Weiss's hair looks wonderful today!
:'''Ruby''': Agh!! Penny!! Where did you come from!?
:'''Penny''': Hey Guys. What are you up to?
:'''Ruby''': Uuuhhhhh...
:'''Yang''': We're looking for our friend Blake.
:'''Penny''': Oh... you mean the Faunus girl.
:'''Ruby''': Wait, how did you know that?
:'''Penny''': Uh, the cat ears?
:'''Yang''': What cat ears? She wears a... bow...
:''[Long pause]''
:'''Ruby''': ''[Whispers to Yang]'' She ''does'' like tuna a lot...
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Sun''': ''[offers Blake an apple]'' &quot;I stole you some food.&quot;
:'''Blake''': Do you always break the law without a second thought?
:'''Sun''': Hey, weren't you in a cult or something?
:'''Blake''': ''[glares at Sun]''
:'''Sun''': Okay.  Too soon.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Blake''': Weiss. I want you to know that I'm no longer associated with the White Fang. Back when I was with-
:'''Weiss''': Do you have any idea how long we've been searching for you?... Twelve Hours. That means I've had twelve hours to think about this. And in that twelve hours I've decided... ''[Yang, Sun, and Ruby waiting for Weiss to answer]'' I don't care! 
:'''Blake''': You don't care?
:'''Weiss''': You said you're not one of them anymore, right?
:'''Blake''': No, I-I haven't been since I was younger-
:'''Weiss''': Upupupupup! I don't wanna hear it. All I want know, is that the next time something this big comes up... you'll come to your teammates, and not some... ''[Weiss look at Sun]'' someone else.
:'''Blake''': Of course.
:'''Ruby''': Yeah! Team RWBY is back together!
''[Team RWBY and Sun come together]''
:'''Weiss''': I'm still not quite sure how I feel about you!
:'''Sun''': ''[Nervous laugh]''

== Volume 2 ==

===Best Day Ever [Volume 2, Episode 1]===
:''[After teams RWBY and JNPR have a food-fight that nearly destroys the entire dining hall, Goodwitch arrives and promptly fixes everything with a wave of her riding crop]''
:'''Glynda Goodwitch''': Children, please...do not play with your food.
:''[Nora belches and Yang crashes back down after Nora launched her through the roof, RWBY and JNPR quietly laugh with one another. Goodwitch starts to grow more angry]''
:'''Professor Ozpin''': Let it go.
:'''Glynda Goodwitch''': ''[Calms down and sighs]'' They're supposed to be the defenders of the world.
:'''Professor Ozpin''': And they will be. But, right now, they're still children. So, why not let them play the part? After all...it isn't a role they'll have forever.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Oh look, she sent the kids again! ''[ruffles Emerald and Mercury's hair]'' This is turning out just like the ''divorce.''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[jerks away]'' Ugh. Spare us the thought of you procreating.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''That'', was a joke.  And this..  ''[Picks a card from her pocket]''  ...might just tell me what you two have been doing all day.
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': What-?  ''[hastily checks her pocket]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': I'm a ''professional'', sweetheart. Pay attention, Maybe you'll learn something. Why do you have this address?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Wouldn't you like to know?
:'''Roman Torchwick''':  Yeah, I ''would''.  Now, what were you two doing again?
:'''Mercury Black''': Cleaning up ''your problems.''  Well, one of them at least.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[sharply]'' I had that ''under control''.
:'''Mercury Black''': ''[smirks]'' Two packed bags and a ticket out of Vale said otherwise.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[raises his cane]'' Listen you little punk, If it were up to me I would take you and your little street-rat friend here, and I would-
:'''Cinder Fall''': Do ''what'', Roman?
''[Cinder appears at the top of the elevator, descending toward them]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[Chuckles]'' I'd, uh... ''not'' kill them?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Cinder!
:'''Cinder Fall''': I thought I made it clear, that you were to eliminate the would-be runaway.
:'''Roma Torchwick''': I was going to!
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': He was going to escape to Vacuo. Mercury and I decided to take it upon ourselves to kill the rat.
:'''Mercury Black''': I think he was some sort of cat, actually.
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': What, like a puma?
:'''Mercury Black''': Yeah, there ya go.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Quiet. Did I not specifically instruct you two to keep your hands ''clean'' while in Vale?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': I just thought-
:'''Cinder''': Don't think... ''Obey. [Behind her, Roman makes a mock throat-slitting gesture]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Yes, ma'am. It won't happen again.
:'''Cinder Fall''': And as for you, Roman, why wasn't this job done sooner?
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[gestures to the warehouse's contents, all around them]'' Uh... eh?  Eh? ''EH!?''  Sorry if I've been stealing every last speck of Dust in the kingdom!
:'''Mercury Black''': You truly are an inspiration for every punk with a gun and a ski mask.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Look around you, kid. Police routed at every corner, dust prices through the roof, and we're sitting pretty atop more dust, crystals, vials, and rounds than we know what to do with!  Speaking of which, if you guys wouldn't mind filling me ''in'' on your grand master plan, it ''might'' actually help my next string of robberies go a little smoother!
:'''Cinder Fall''': Oh, Roman... Have a little ''faith. [touches his cheek, her eyes glinting]''  You'll know what you need when you ''need'' to know.

===Welcome to Beacon [Volume 2, Episode 2]===
:'''Ironwood''': But ask yourself this: do you honestly think that your children can win a war?
''[Ironwood leaves.]''
:'''Ozpin''': I hope they never have to.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Yang''': Pretty sneaky sis, [[w:Yu-Gi-Oh!|but you've just activated my trap card!]]
:'''Ruby''': ''[Shrieked]'' WHAT!
:'''Yang''': Giant Nevermore!  If I roll a seven or higher, fatal feathers will slice your fleet in two!
:'''Ruby''': But, if you roll a six or lower, the Nevermore will turn on your own forces!
:'''Yang''': That's a risk that I am willing to take.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Yang''': Well, Weiss, it's your turn.
:'''Weiss''': I have... absolutely no idea what's going on.
:'''Yang''': Look.  It's easy.  You're playing as Vacuo which means all Vacuo based cards come with a bonus
:'''Weiss''': That sounds dumb.
:'''Yang''': ''[shuffles through Weiss's cards]''  See, you've got Sandstorm, Desert Scavage, Oh, oh!  Resourceful Raider!  See, now you could take Ruby's discarded airfleet... ''[Ruby sobs]'' and put it in ''your'' hand!
:'''Weiss''': Okay.
:'''Yang''': And since Vacuo warriors have an endurance boost against natural hazards, you could use Sandstorm to disable my ground forces and simultaniously infiltrate my kingdom!  Just know that I will not forget this declaration of war.
:'''Weiss''': And that means...
:'''Ruby''': You're just three moves away from conquoring Remnant!
:'''Weiss''': ''[Evil laughing]'' YES! FEAR THE ALMIGHTY POWER OF MY FORCES! COWER AS THEY PILLAGE YOUR HOMES AND WEEP AS THEY TAKE YOUR CHILDREN FROM YOUR VERY ARMS-!
:'''Yang''': Trap card.
:'''Weiss''': Huh?
:'''Yang''': Your armies have been destroyed.
:'''Weiss''': ''[sobs]'' I hate this game of emotions we play!
:'''Ruby''': ''[Crying as well, embracing Weiss]'' Stay strong, Weiss. We'll make it through this together.
:'''Weiss''': ''[Reciprocating the hug]'' Shut up! Don't touch me!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Jaune''': Hey! Can I play?
:'''Ruby''': Sorry Jaune, we've already got four people.
:'''Weiss''': Besides, this game requires a certain level of tactical cunning that I seriously doubt you possess.
:'''Yang''': Uhh... You attacked your own navel fleet two turns ago.
:'''Weiss''': Hmph!
:'''Jaune''': Bring it on, Ice Queen! I had you know that I've been told I'm a natural born leader.
:'''Weiss''': By who? your mother?!
:'''Jaune''': And Pyrrha!
:'''Pyrrha''': Hello again!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Sun''': 'Sup losers!
''[Sun and Neptune appear]''
:'''Ruby''': Hey, Sun!
:'''Sun''': Ruby, Yang, Blake, Ice Queen...
:'''Weiss''': Why does everyone keep calling me that!?
:'''Sun''': I never got a chance to formally introduce you to my old friend.
:'''Neptune''': Uh... aren't libraries for reading?
:'''Ren''': ''[Team JNPR is sitting at a table nearby, studying; Nora's sleeping]'' Thank you!
:'''Nora''': ''[Jolts awake]'' Pancakes!
:'''Sun''': Shut up. Don't be a nerd.
:'''Neptune''': Intellectual. Okay. Thank you. I'm Neptune.
:'''Weiss''': So, Neptune, where are you from? 
:'''Neptune''': Haven... And I don't believe I've caught your name, snow angel.
:'''Weiss''': Um... I'm Weiss.
:'''Jaune''': ''[Having earlier addressed Weiss as &quot;snow angel&quot;] Are you kidding me!?
:'''Neptune''': Pleasure to meet you.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Ruby''': Let's hatch a plan
:'''Yang''': Yeah!
:'''Ruby''': Ahh! I left my board game in the library!
:'''Weiss''': We're doomed.

===A Minor Hiccup [Volume 2, Episode 3]===
:''[After seeing Sun at the window, Team RWBY backs away]''
:'''Blake''': Sun!
:'''Yang''': How did you get up there? 
:'''Sun''': Ah it's easy. I do it all the time.
:'''Weiss''': You do what?!
:'''Sun''': I climb trees all the time! ''[Weiss narrows her glare at Sun, who flips into the room]'' So... are we finally getting back at that Torchwick guy?
:'''Blake''': WE, are going to investigate the situation. ''[Gestures to the rest of RWBY]'' As a TEAM.
:'''Ruby''': Sorry Sun, we don't want to get friends involved if we don't have to.
:'''Sun''': Psh! That's dumb! We should always get friends involved. That's why I brought Neptune.
:''[RWBY looks out the window, and sees Neptune standing on the ledge right next to the window, back firmly against the wall]''
:'''Neptune''': 'Sup?
:'''Ruby''': How did you even get up here?
:'''Neptune''': I have my ways. ''[Looks down]'' Seriously though, can I come in? We're like, really high up right now.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': All right. I'll go with Weiss. Sun, you can go with Blake. And Neptune, you can go with Yang since she doesn't have a partner. Everyone good?
:'''Weiss''': Actually Ruby, why don't you go with Yang, heh. After all she is your sister.
:'''Ruby''': But Weiss, who would go with you then?
:'''Weiss''': Well, I guess Neptune could come with me.
:'''Ruby''': ''[laughs]'' Nah. ''[Walks out of the room, dragging Weiss behind her]''
:'''Weiss''': But! But!

===Painting the Town [Volume 2, Episode 4]===
:'''Gangster #1''': Hurry, close the door she's coming!
:''[Two gangsters close the door]''
:'''Junior''': What are you two idiots doing!?
:''[Two gangsters trying to talk to Junior, until the door explodes open. Yang walks in]'' 
:'''Yang''': Guess who's back!
:''[A bunch of Junior's &quot;staff&quot; point their guns at Yang. The music being played in the club starts to skip. Yang gives a look to the DJ, who briefly comes out of hiding to turn off the record.]''
:'''Neptune''': Yeah, so could you define &quot;friend&quot; for me?
:'''Junior''': Stop, stop! Nobody shoot. Blondie! You're here. Why?
:'''Yang''': You still owe me a drink. ''[Yang drags Junior to the bar]''
:'''Neptune''': Whoa, what a woman... ''[looking at Malachite twins]'' 'Sup?
:'''Malachite Twins''': ''[Walking away]'' Hmm. Whatever.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sun''': I don't get it.  If you believe that what you're doing is right, why hide who you are?
:'''Blake''': The masks are a symbol.  Humanity wanted to make monsters out of us, so we chose to don the faces of monsters.
:'''Sun''': Grimm masks?  That's kinda dark.
:'''Blake''': So is the guy that started it.
:'''Sun''': Always sunshine and rainbows with you.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Junior''': I don't know
:'''Yang''': How can you not know?
:'''Junior''': I haven't talked to him. I haven't even seen him since the night you first came in here. He paid upfront, I lent him my men, and none of them ever came back.
:'''Neptune''': So where did they go?
:'''Junior''': What kind of stupid question is that? They never came back! Who is this guy?
:'''Yang''': Don't worry about him.  Worry about me if I don't get what I want.
:'''Junior''': I haven't seen him since that night!  Torchwick hired my boys, and I guess he wasn't happy with them. WHICH IS SOMETHING I CAN RELATE TO!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[Yang tries to fire at him, but her attack gets blocked by Neopolitan]'' Ladies, Ice Queen..
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Hey!
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Always a pleasure. Neo, if you would...
:''[Neopolitan gives an elegant bow to RWBY. Yang charges at Neo and Roman, but when she strikes them, they shatter to pieces, and they're then seen flying away on an aircraft]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': So, I guess he got a new henchman.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Yeah, I guess she really made our plans...&quot;fall apart&quot;, huh?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': No, just...no.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': What? But you do it!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': There's a time and a place for jokes.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Was this not it?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No, it was just not very good.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Well, at least I'm trying!
:'''Ruby''': Wait, Where are Sun and Neptune?
:''[At the noodle house, Sun and Neptune eating noodles]''
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': They're probably fine, right?
:'''Sun Wukong''': Probably.

===Extracurricular [Volume 2, Episode 5]===
:'''Jaune''': ''[While playing guitar]'' ♫Weeeiiisssss♫ ''[Then wink]''
''[Weiss slams the door closed]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[Knocks three times]'' Oh come on. ''[Knocks three times]'' Open the door... I promise not to sing.
''[Weiss opens the door again]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[While playing guitar]'' ♫I liiieed♫ ♫Weiss Schnee, will you accompany me, to the dance on... Sunday!♫
:'''Weiss''': Are you done?
:'''Jaune''': ...Yes?
:'''Weiss''': NO. ''[Closes the door to Jaune face, then turns to Ruby and Yang]'' What?
:'''Yang''': And that's why they call you the Ice Queen.
''[Ruby fell down]''
:'''Weiss''': All my life, boys have only cared about the perks of my last name. Besides, I already have a date in mind.
===Burning the Candle [Volume 2, Episode 6]===
:'''Jaune Arc''': It's Weiss. I'm completely head-over-heels for her, and she won't even give me a chance. She's cold, but she's also incredible. She's smart, and graceful, and talented. I mean, have you heard her sing? I-I just wish she's take me seriously, y'know? I wish I could tell her how I feel without messing it all up.
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Then do it.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Uh, wha-?
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Tell her exactly what you said. No ridiculous schemes, No pick-up lines. Just... be honest.
:'''Jaune Arc''': But, wh-
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Jaune. You can't get it wrong if it's the truth
:'''Jaune Arc''': ... You're right. Thanks, Pyrrha. ''[To Ren]'' Good talk, Ren! 
''[Jaune leaves to go to Weiss. Pyrrha smiles until Jaune leaves, then turns somber and walks to the other side of the room. Nora watches her]''
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': ''[sighs]'' Practice what you preach, Pyrrha.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You don't understand! I'm the only one who can do this!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No...''[Turns to Blake, her eyes now red]'' YOU don't understand! If Roman Torchwick walked through that door right now, what would you do?!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I'd fight him!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Shoves Blake]'' You'd LOSE!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[Shoves Yang back]'' I can stop him!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Shoves Blake harder]'' You can't even stop ME!

===Dance Dance Infiltration [Volume 2, Episode 7]===
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Hey, uh... Jaune, right?
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[sighs]'' Yeah.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': This party's pretty lame, huh? I mean, ballroom dancing: Pbbfff.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Yeah.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Cute girls though, huh?
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[Grunt]'' Is that all you think about? 
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Huh?
:'''Jaune Arc''': D-do you even care about the girls you're hitting on? How they feel about you?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Whoa, where's this coming from!?
:'''Jaune Arc''': How could you turn her down like that?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Wait, w-who?
:'''Jaune Arc''': Weiss!
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': I, uh... it, uh... It just didn't work out. Y'know?
:'''Jaune Arc''': What? You think you're too cool? Too many other options? ''Weiss Schnee'' asked you to the dance. What in the world could possibly keep you from go-
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': I can't dance.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Beg your pardon?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': I can't dance, man
:'''Jaune Arc''': But, you're... so... cool.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Thank you. I try really, really, hard.
:'''Jaune Arc''': You would rather break a girl's heart, and go to a dance alone, than... just admit to everyone that you can't move in rhythm to music?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': That about sums it up, yeah. 
:'''Jaune Arc''': Well, I certainly feel a lot better about myself. 
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Please don't tell anybody. Look, if you want Weiss, she's all yours; I don't wanna get in your way.
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[sign]'' Do you like her?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Yeah, I mean, I don't know her too well yet, but she seems pretty cool.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Then just go ''talk'' to her. No pickup lines, no suave moves. Just be yourself. I've heard that's the way to go.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Yeah, but that isn't-
:'''Jaune Arc''': Hey, you don't have to look cool all the time. In all honesty, if you could be a little less cool, I'd really appreciate it. 
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Yeah. Okay.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Go talk to her. I guarantee it'll make her night.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Thanks. You're a really cool guy, Jaune.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Alright, don't lie to my face. ''[both of them fist bump, after Neptune left]'' ''[sign]'' Alright.  Only one thing left to do.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Yang''': ''[sigh]'' Tomorrow it's back to work.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Well, I'm sure we can handle whatever gets thrown at us. ''[She notices something and starts laughing]'' Except for ''that.''
''[Every student continue to laugh, until Pyrrha notices Jaune]''
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': ...Jaune? ''[Jaune is wearing a dress]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Promise is a promise.
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': ''[Laughing]'' Jaune, you didn't have to.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Hey, an Arc never goes back on his word. Now do you wanna stand there and laugh at me, or do you wanna dance?
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': I would ''love'' to dance.
''[Jaune grabs Pyrrha, and takes her to the dance floor]''
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Ren! This. is. HAPPENING!!!!!
:''' Lie Ren''': Wait. ''What'' is happening?

===Field Trip [Volume 2, Episode 8]===
:''' James Ironwood''': We send as many troops as we can to the southeast, find out exactly what's going on, and eradicate any forces that stand in our way.
:'''Glynda Goodwitch''': Why must your answer to everything involve a triumphant display of military bravado?! You treat every situation like it's a contest of measuring di-!
:'''Professor Ozpin''': Glynda!
:''' Glynda Goodwitch''': Well, he does.
:'''Professor Ozpin''': She's right, you know.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Yang''': Oh! I know what will cheer you up.
:'''Ruby''': What's that?
:'''Yang''': ''[After grabbing a mail]'' I don't know yet. Dad sent it to us. I thought we could open it together.
:'''Ruby''': ''[High pitched]'' Ooh! Something from home! ''[Rushes to Yang's back to get the mail]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Zwei''': Ruh! Ruh!
:'''Team RWBY''': Waaa-aaah!
:'''Ruby''': Zweeeiii!
:'''Blake''': He sent a dog?!
:'''Weiss''': In the mail??
:'''Ruby''': *giggles* ''[Zwei licks Ruby face]''
:'''Yang''': Oh he does stuff like this all the time.
:'''Ruby''': Stop it, ahaha! ''[Zwei continues licking Ruby face]''
:'''Blake''': ''[On the top bunk bed]'' Your father or your dog?
:'''Ruby''': I missed youuu!
:'''Weiss''': Are you telling me that this mangy...drooling...mutt is going to wiv with us foweva? Oh, yes he is yes he is! Oh isn't he adorable!
:'''Blake''': Please keep it away from my belongings.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': Beside it won't only be us out there. We'll be fighting alongside a genuine Huntsman! 
:'''Yang''': Yeah!
''[Scene cuts to RWBY showing different expressions of shock and disbelief as they see who their Huntsman is]''
:'''Oobleck''': Why, hello, girls! Who ready to fight for their lives?

'''Search and Destroy [Volume 2, Episode 9]'''
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': Ruby!''[Rwby drops her scythe]'' I thought I told you to leave all your bags back at school.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But, uh you hadn't told us to listen to you yet... So I didn't.
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': She's not wrong. Very well. Ruby, leave your bag here we can pick it up upon our return.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But I-whaa
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': Young lady, what in the world could you possibly have in that bag that could be so important for you to bring it-
''[Zwei sticks his head out of Ruby's backpack and yips]''
:'''Ruby''': ''[Whisper]'' Get back in the bag.
:'''Oobleck''': We're here to investigate an abandoned urban jungle teeming with death and hostility and you brought...a dog?
:'''Ruby Rose''': I-uhh...!
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': Genius! ''[Spin around grab Zwei leaving Ruby to the ground]'' Canines are historically known for their perceptive nose and heightened sense of sound, making them excellent companions for hunts such as ours!
''[Zwei barks]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': I'm a genius.

===Mountain Glenn [Volume 2, Episode 10]===
:'''Yang Xiao long''': Blake, are you awake?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Yeah.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Why do you think [Dr. Oobleck] asked us about being a Huntress? Like, what was he trying to say? 
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Maybe he was curious.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You think?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ...No.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Sighs]'' Weiss, are you awake?
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Of course I'm awake, you two are talking!

===No Brakes [Volume 2, Episode 11]===

:'''Oobleck''': Hurry, children! We must get to the front and stop this train!
:'''Weiss''': Uh... Professor?
:'''Oobleck''': Doctor.
:'''Weiss''': What's that?
''[Weiss pointing at a bomb]''
:'''Oobleck''': That, my dear... appears to be a bomb.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After part of the train exploded]''
:'''Oobleck''': That's not good...
:'''Ruby''': Uh, neither is this! 
''[Ruby sees another bomb]''
:'''Blake''': Another bomb?!
''[Dr. Oobleck checking on another train]''
:'''Oobleck''': No, no, no...
''[Oobleck opens the roof of the train and sees another bomb]''
:'''Oobleck''': They all have bombs!

===Breach [Volume 2, Episode 12]===
:'''Jaune''': Okay, who's first?
''[Big Ursa steps in]''
:'''Jaune''': O-oh-oh-okay. You're first, huh? Ha-ha okay. No, that's-that's fine. 
''[Pyrrha kills three Grimm, and sees Jaune facing off the big Ursa]''
:'''Jaune''': Totally fine, done this before. Done this before. ''[sigh]'' ''[Jaune starts to swing his sword a couple times, but the big Ursa doesn't collapse until five seconds later. Pyrrha smiles at him]''
''[Sun and Neptune appear]''
:'''Sun''': Nobody move, Junior Detectives!
:'''Neptune''': We have badges, so you know it's official.
''[Both of them fistbump]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Yang''': Well...we did it.
:'''Blake''': We did it.
:'''Weiss''': If we don't get extra credit for that, I'm going to be seriously disappointed.
:'''Yang''': Weiss, a two-headed snake literally crushed a bakery. I wouldn't count on it.
:'''Ruby''': Plus, I mean, we didn't solve everything. A lot of people were hurt, and we still don't even know why they did this, or who that mystery girl was.
:'''Weiss''': Well, not every story has a neat and tidy ending.
:'''Blake''': We may not have all the answers, but we do have a lot of dangerous people behind bars, and I think that's something we can be proud of.
:'''Ruby''': Yeah, and if somebody tries something like this again, we'll be there to stop them.
:'''Yang''': ''[Stretches and lays back, replies with no emotion]'' Yay, teamwork, camaraderie, good guys, go team, alright, good job. So...what now?
:'''Weiss''': I'd suggest training for the tournament, but I think we have that covered at this point.
:'''Blake''': So, then...?
:'''Ruby''': Uh, time for bed?
:'''Weiss''': Oh, please, yes.
:'''Blake''': Absolutely.
:'''Yang''': I'm going to sleep forever.

== Volume 3 ==

===Round One [Volume 3, Episode 1]===
''[RWBY fights team ABRN. Yang nearly gets attacked by Nadir. Ruby stops him]''
:'''Ruby''': I got your back!
:'''Bolin Hori''': ''[About to attack Ruby]'' Who's got yours? ''[He gets knocked away by Weiss]'' 
:'''Ruby''': My BFF!
:'''Weiss''': NO.
:'''Ruby''': ''(Whispers to herself)'' YES!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[RWBY goes to a noodles stand to eat]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I'll have a bowl of the regular, please. ''[A big bowl of noodles is put in front of her]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Uhh...I'll take the same. ''[A bowl is placed in front of her]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Hmm, do you have a low salt-? ''[A bowl looking exactly like Ruby and Yang's is put in front of her]'' Umm...okay...
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[Gives a knowing nod to the vendor, the Old Man, who nods back and rushes back into the kitchen then hurries back, placing a bowl of noodles with fish on top in front of Blake. She gasps and turns starry-eyed, drooling, her heart audibly pounding]'' Ohhhhh....
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Weiss produces a credit card to pay]'' Aw, Weiss, what's the occasion?
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Consider it &quot;Thanks for sending you to the doubles round.&quot; ''[Her card is thrown back like a throwing star, embedding itself in the counter, to the shock of the whole team. The Old Man clears his throat and points to the cash register, which says &quot;DECLINED&quot;]'' What? How can my card be declined? I was barely into my monthly allowance!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[Glances around and tries to take her bowl, but it's taken away by the Old Man]'' Nooo...
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Maybe I can help?
''[Team JNPR appears]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Pyrrha!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Aw, you don't have to!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': BUT SHE COULD!
''[Moments Team RWBY and Team JNPR have finished eating. Both Weiss and Jaune look uncomfortably full]''
:'''Lie Ren''': Are you sure it's wise to have eaten before a fight?
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Of course. It will give us energy.
''[Nora lets out a very loud burp]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[Gives a sick groan]'' If I barf, I'm blaming you.
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Ooo! Aim it at the enemy!
:'''Lie Ren''': Nora, that's disgusting. But, if you ''do'' feel the urge...
:'''Jaune Arc''': Got it.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nora''': We've got a world-renowed fighter on our team, what's basically a ninja, I can bench five of me, ...Jaune, we've trained all year, our weapons are awesome, Glynda barely yells at us anymore, and uh... Jaune!
:'''Ren''': Are you gonna take that?
:'''Jaune''': She's not wrong...
:'''Nora''': I'm kidding! He know I'm kidding. Don't be so nervous! The worst that could happen is we lose! Then it's just a few more years of walking around school with everyone knowing we're failures, our friends will slowly abandon us to preserve their social status, ''[Starting to be nervous]'' we won't be able to show our faces in class, ''[Turning white]'' no one will sit with us in the cafeteria, Ren and I have no parents, we have no home left to go to, we'll be officially renamed Team LOSER-per! Ah ha ha ha ha! ''[Sobbing]''
:'''Ren''': Sooo yeah. We're feeling pretty good.
:'''Pyrrha''': Don't fret. If anything, we should looking forward to a fight with actual guidelines and not... Well, murderers.
:'''Yang''': Yeah don't sweat it! We've all faced way worse before.
:'''Blake''': Let's see: Grimm Invasion, violent extremists, a destructive sociopath.
:'''Ruby''': And that's all while we were still in training! Oh, imagine what it'll be like when we graduate!
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[wistfully]'' Maybe ''then'' I'll be able to pay for a meal. 

===New Challengers [Volume 3, Episode 2]===
:'''Jaune''': This is it, guys! Let's finish 'em with team attacks! Nora, Ren, Flower Power!
:'''Nora''': Wait... What?
:'''Jaune''': F-Flower Power. ''[Pyrrha, Nora, and Ren just shrug]'' That's your team attack name.
:'''Ren''': Since... when?
:'''Jaune''': Guys, we went over this! Flower Power is Ren and Nora. Ren brings the flower, Nora brings the power.
:'''Ren''': How do I bring a flower?
:'''Nora''': No, silly! Not 'a flower'! Flour! Like in baking!
:'''Ren''': Why would I bring that?
:'''Jaune''': I, uh, no, it's your symbol!
:'''Pyrrha''': So... what are we?
:'''Jaune''': Pyrrha!
:'''Pyrrha''': Sorry! I just wanna make sure it's clearly defined.
''[Team BRNZ still listen to Team JNPR]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[distantly]'' Pyrrha, you and I are Arkos. It's the thing, where we take our shields, remember?
:'''Pyrrha''': Arkos?
:'''Jaune''': Yeah. It's our names put together?
:'''Pyrrha''': Right... no, I get it.
:'''Jaune''': What, do you not like it?
:'''Pyrrha''': No, no, it's... good?
:'''Nora''': Mmm, I sensed hesitation!
:'''Brawnz''': Hey!
:'''Team JNPR''': Huh?
:'''Brawnz''': What do you think you doing?!
:'''Jaune''': Trying to have a team meeting, thank you very little.
:'''Nora''': ''[Angrily]'' Yeah! Team ears only!
:'''Brawnz''': We in the middle of a fight!
:'''Jaune''': ''[Yelled]'' And we're in the middle of the conversation! What don't you get about that?!
:'''Pyrrha''': Um, Jaune?
:'''Jaune''': Yes, Pyrrha?!
:'''Pyrrha''': I think he means that we're ALL in the middle of the fight?
''[Crowd jeering]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[Sign]'' Nora, just... hit them with the hammer.
:'''Nora''': ...GOT IT.
:'''Brawnz''': Wait... what?!
''[Nora hits all of BRNZ at once with her hammer]''
:'''Team BRNZ''': Ah!
''[Team BRNZ crash to the side wall]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Weiss''': Good luck, Neptune!
''[Neptune sees NDGO and flirts]''
:'''Neptune''': Ladies...
:'''Weiss''': ''[Angrily and yelled]'' BREAK HIS STUPID FACE, NDGO!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neptune''': Alright girls, try and remember. Hands above the waist. 
:'''Sun''': Ignore him, for he...yeah, he's dumb.
''[Neptune wink]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After NDGO got desert]''
:'''Nebula''': Alright, home field advantage
:'''Sun''': Don't get to cocky, that's my turf too.
:'''Scarlet''': I hope I don't get sand in my shoes.
:'''Neptune''': Be cool, man.
:'''Gwen''': Hey, the ocean!
:'''Neptune''': HUH?! ''[look at the water symbol and gets scared]''
:'''Ruby''': Uh... what's wrong with Neptune?
:'''Blake''': Oh no...
''[The ocean appears on the battlefield, and Neptune freezes in horror]''
:'''Blake''': Neptune's... afraid of the water.
:'''Oobleck''': Three, two, one, begin!
''[Neptune rush to the desert]''
:'''Sun''': Neptune! What are you doing?
:'''Neptune''': Oh, you know, just, uh, getting to higher ground.
:'''Sun''': On the enemy's side?!
''[Scarlet drops his jacket]''
:'''Neptune''': They would never expect it!
:'''Dew''': He's not wrong.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After Team SSSN beats Team NDGO when Neptune electrifies the water, shocking out NDGO]''
:'''Professor Port''': And with that, Team SSSN moves on to the doubles round. You know what I call that victory?
:'''Dr. Oobleck''': &quot;Shocking&quot;?
:'''Professor Port''': No, &quot;well-earned&quot;. What you said is stupid.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': Aw, that was so close!
:'''Yang''': Looks like the dorks made it to the next round.
''[Blake watches Sun and Neptune celebrate their win over NDGO. Sun turns to Blake and points to her with a wink]''
:'''Blake''': ''[Blushes]'' Emphasis on &quot;dork&quot;.
:'''Oobleck''': ''[Microphone]'' That concludes the matches for today. Please leave the coliseum in a CALM AND ORDERLY FASHION!
:'''Yang''': Come on, let's go congratulate' em!

===It's Brawl in the Family [Volume 3, Episode 3]===
:'''Winter''': Beacon, it's been a long time. The air feels, different.
:'''Ruby''': I mean it is fall so it's probably colder...
''[Weiss punch Ruby on her right shoulder]''
:'''Ruby''': Ahh!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winter''': ''[sigh]'' How have you been!
:'''Weiss''': - Oh, splendid! Thank you for asking. I'm actually in the very top ranking of our sparring class. The rest of my studies are going wonderful too. I'm-
''[Winter slap Weiss on the head]''
:'''Winter''': Silence, you boob! I don't recall asking about ranking. I asked how you've been. Are you eating properly? Have you taken up any hobbies? Are you making new friends?
:'''Weiss''': Well, there's Ruby.
:'''Ruby''': ''[Snorts]'' Boob. ''[After fixing a bump on Weiss's head]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qrow''': Hey, ''[Weiss and Winter turn around]'' yeah! I talking to you, Ice Queen.
:'''Winter''': Halt!
:'''Weiss''': Excuse me? ''[Walking toward Qrow]'' Do you have any idea who you talking to?
:'''Qrow''': ''[Holds Weiss head]'' Sssshhhh, Not you. ''[Pushes Weiss away]''
:'''Weiss''': Hey!
:'''Qrow''': ''[Walking toward Winter]'' YOU.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': What's going on?!
:'''Weiss''': Some crazy guy just started attacking my sister!
:'''Ruby''': Oh, no! Who would do such a th-aaaaat is my uncle!
:'''Weiss''': What?!
:'''Ruby''': Kick her butt, Uncle Qrow!
:'''Weiss''': Uhh, teach him respect, Winter!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': UNCLE QROWWWWWWWW! ''[She rushes to him and jumps onto his arm, hanging on]'' Hi...Oh, it's so good to see you! Did you miss me? Did you miss me?!
:'''Qrow''': ''[Smiles and ruffles Ruby's hair]'' Nope.
:'''Ozpin''': Qrow. A word, please.
:'''Qrow''': ''[Aside to Ruby]'' I think I'm in trouble.
:'''Ruby''': Well, you did tear up our courtyard.
:'''Qrow''': Yeah, I did. ''[Winks and bumps fists with Ruby]'' Catch you later, kid. 
''[Qrow leaves with Ozpin while Goodwitch repairs the damage from Qrow's fight with Winter.]''
:'''Weiss''': ''[To Ruby]'' And, suddenly, your recklessness makes sense. 
:'''Ruby''': ''[Elbows Weiss]'' You're just mad, 'cause he whooped butt.
:'''Weiss''': That was a draw, at best!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winter''': What were you thinking?
:'''Ironwood''': If you were one of my men, I'd have you shot!
:'''Qrow''': If I was one of your men, I'd shoot myself.
:'''Goodwitch''': While I wouldn't condone his behavior, retaliating like you did certainly didn't help the situation.
:'''Winter''': He was drunk!
:'''Goodwitch''': He's ''always'' drunk. ''[They turn and see Qrow drinking from his flask. He sees them staring at him and stops drinking with a shrug]''

===Lessons Learned [Volume 3, Episode 4]===
:'''Coco''': Hey, ''[Lowers her sunglasses]'' Love the outfit, kid.
:'''Emerald''': I'll try not to get blood on it!
:'''Yatsuhashi''': ''[stands up]'' I can't promise you'll leave without a scratch.
:'''Emerald''': ''I'' won't be the one bleeding.
:'''Coco''': Oooh, I like her!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Coco''': ''[After her sunglasses break]'' I take it back; I ''don't' like her.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qrow''': I come across a small village in the swamps West of Mistaral. Right off the bat, I knew something wasn't right. 
:'''Ruby''': What were you doing there?
:'''Qrow''': I needed information. Tired from battling Grimm along the way, I decided to start my search at the town's Inn. The place was crawling with low-lifes and thugs, even a few Huntsmen I could only assume had been hired by less than reputable people for less than respectable jobs. And that's when it happened.
:'''Yang''': What happened?
:'''Qrow''': I was defeated... by the mere sight... of the Inn Keeper's skirt length!
''[Yang throw a pillow at Qrow, after that story and also beating her in the video game]''
:'''Game Announcer''': Soaring Ninja, Wins. Total Annihilation!
:'''Yang''': You are the worst!
''[Qrow and Ruby start to laugh]''
:'''Qrow''': Best two out of three?
:'''Ruby''': So, Uncle Qrow, did you get in trouble with Ozpin?
:'''Qrow''': Nah, me and Oz go way back. We're cool.
:'''Yang''': Tch, cool for a old guy.
:'''Qrow''': Not funny.

===Never Miss a Beat [Volume 3, Episode 5]===
:'''Ruby''': So is she... your friend or... 
:'''Penny''': She's like Blake, but if Blake was ordered to spend time with you. 
:'''Ruby''': Oh. So, Weiss. 
:'''Penny''': Precisely!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After Flynt Coal blame Weiss, that her father close his father Dust shop]''
:'''Yang''': Hey! Why don't you-
:'''Neon Katt''': Hey! Why don't you... That's what you sound like!
:'''Yang''': Uh...
:'''Neon Katt''': Hey! Where did you get your hair extensions?
:'''Yang''': This is just my normal hair...
:'''Neon Katt''': Ooh! Really?
:'''Yang''': Yeah! Is that a prob-
:'''Neon Katt''': You should try rollerblading sometime. It's suuuper-fun! It probably would take you a while, since you're so, you know...&quot;top-heavy&quot;.
:'''Yang''': ''[Yang looks at her chest]'' EXCUSE ME?
:'''Ruby''': ''[Watching in the stands with Blake, quietly]'' Oh, here we go...
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neon Katt''': ''[After freezing Yang right leg]'' Hmm-mmm, Look! Now you're ''[spanks her butt] &quot;bottom-heavy&quot; too.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neon Katt''': Ooh! Flashy eyes! You know, you're actually look kinda pretty while you're angry.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neon Katt''': Never miss a beat, never miss a beat, Never... miss a... ''[Trying not to fall, until she trips on a crack in the floor]'' ...beat?
''[Neon starts to roll to a geyser, leaving an opening for Yang, who blasts her]''
:'''Neon Katt''': AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! ''[The blast explodes, and Neon Katt is eliminated]
''[Crowd cheer]''
''[Yang started to breathe for 3 seconds]''
:'''Yang''': ''[After her eyes turn back to normal]'' Weiss! ''[Yang rush to Weiss]'' Weiss! Are you okay?
:'''Weiss''': ''[Coughs]'' I may not be singing for a while...
:'''Yang''': You know...I don't think that was proper form.
:'''Weiss''': Oh ha, ha! ''[coughs]''
:'''Neon Katt''': ''[high pitched]'' WHAT?! We lost?! We lost?! Team FNKI lost?! That was... That was... AMAZING!! Oh my gosh you guys were super crazy awesome! We should DEFINITELY party together sometimes! Right, Flynt?
:'''Flynt Coal''': That was a gutsy move, Schnee...I dig it.
''[Ruby and Blake rush to their teammates]''

:'''Blake''': Good job you two!
:'''Ruby''': Yeah!
===Fall [Volume 3, Episode 6]===
''[After Yang defeats Mercury]''
:'''Ruby''': Yeah! You did it, sis!
:'''Blake''': Way a go, Yang!
:'''Yang''': Better luck next time.
:'''Mercury''': ''[suddenly menacing]'' There's not going to ''be'' a next time, Blondie!

===Beginning of the End [Volume 3, Episode 7]===
:'''Mercury''': Oh, Doc! Tell me! Will I ever walk again? ''[Emerald hits Mercury]'' Ow! What's your deal?
:'''Emerald''': Ugh, headache. One mind I can handle, but two is a stretch.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Emerald turns off the TV]''
:'''Mercury''': Hey, I was watching that!
:'''Emerald''': Shut up!
:'''Mercury''': Is this how you treat a patient? ''[Emerald twists a screwdriver on Mercury robotic leg]'' Ow! Too tight!
:'''Cinder''': Enough. Our Mercury put on a wonderful show. He was quite brave.
:'''Mercury''': These things aren't exactly cheap ya know.

===Destiny [Volume 3, Episode 8]===
:'''Nora''': You heard the lady! No more moping around! ''[Changes into a workout attire]'' We gotta get your butt in shape for the big fight! It could be today! It could be tomorrow! It could be ''[while lifting 1000 LB weights]'' the most important fight of your entire life! ''[Then falls down]''
:'''Pyrrha''': Um...
:'''Ren''': Nora's right. ''[Wearing an apron that says &quot;Please do nothing to the cook&quot;]'' You can't let your concern for Yang hold you back. You need to focus. You'll be defending the honor of Beacon Academy.
:'''Pyrrha''': Of course. I-
:'''Ren''': ''[Giving Pyrrha a cup of what appears to be green sludge]'' This blend of herbs and vegetables is filled with nutrients vital to your body's well being.
:'''Pyrrha''': Oh... that's-
:'''Ren''': Please, there's no need to thank me.
:'''Nora''': Thank you?! Ugh, that looks like slime from a lake-bed!
:'''Ren''': Algae contains numerous spectacular properties. See for yourself.
''[Nora starts to drink Ren's special shake, her face turn green]''
:'''Nora''': Ugh! ''[rush to the trash can and vomits, while Pyrrha grins]'' What is wrong with you?
:'''Ren''': Me? You're the one that wasted perfectly good juice.
:'''Nora''': We're supposed to help Pyrrha, not poison her!
:'''Ren''': There was absolutely nothing wrong with that.
:'''Nora''': If it looks the same coming up as it does going down, then there's something wrong!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qrow''': Hey there, fire-cracker.
:'''Yang''': Hey Qrow...
:'''Qrow''': So why'd you do it?
:'''Yang''': You know why.
:'''Qrow''': All I know is that you attacked a helpless kid. So either you're lying, or you're crazy. 
:'''Yang''': I'm NOT lying.
:'''Qrow''': Hm, crazy. Got it.

===PvP [Volume 3, Episode 9]===
''[All of Remnant has watched Pyrrha accidentally destroy Penny in the Tournament Final, revealing her android nature]''
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': ''[into his earpiece]'' Broadcast, what are you doing?! Kill the feed!
:'''Broadcast''': Something's wrong! We don't have control over the cameras! We can't even shut off the broadcast!
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': What?! How is that even possible?
''[The coverage on-screen is suddenly overcast with the image of a black Chess Queen, illuminated in red.]
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[over the speakers]'' This... is ''not'' a tragedy. This... was ''not'' an accident. This is what happens, when you sacrifice your trust- your safety- your ''children''- to men who claim to be our guardians.
''[As the audience reacts with increasing surprise, anger and fear, Cinder is shown standing atop Beacon Academy, speaking into her Scroll]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': But are, in reality... nothing more than ''men.'' Our Academies' Headmasters wield more power than most armies, and one was audacious enough to control ''both.'' They cling to this power in the name of peace, and yet, what do we have to show for it? One nation's attempt a synthetic army, mercilessly torn apart by another's star pupil. What need would ''Atlas'' have, for a soldier disguised as an innocent little girl? I don't think the ''Grimm'' can tell the difference.
''[In the stands, Ironwood angrily leaves his seat, while Pyrrha stares tearfully at Penny's remains. At the food stands, Weiss looks sad, while Blake looks angry; in the dorms, Yang grips the windowsill, looking worried.]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': And what, may I ask you, is Ozpin teaching ''his'' students? First a dismemberment, now this?! Huntsmen and Huntresses should carry themselves with honor and mercy, yet I have witnessed neither. Perhaps Ozpin felt as though defeating Atlas in the tournament, would help people forget his ''collossal'' failure to protect Vale, when the Grimm invaded its' streets. Or perhaps... this was his message, to the tyrannical dictator, that has occupied an unsuspecting kingdom with armed forces.
''[Ozpin watches from his office in Beacon Tower]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': Honestly? I haven't the slightest clue as to who is right and who is wrong. But I know that the existence of peace, is fragile... and the leaders of our Kingdoms, conduct their business with ''iron gloves''.
''[Emerald discreetly ducks out of the stands]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': As someone who hails from Mistral, I can assure you... the situation there is... ''equally'' undesireable. Our Kingdoms are at the brink of war, yet we, the citizens, are kept in the dark!
''[Drawn by the magnified negative emotions, hordes of Grimm begin to charge out of the fog near Vale; the Atlesian guards fire on them]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': So, I ask you... when the first shots are fired... who do ''you'' think you can trust?
''[The screens go dark]''
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': The feeds are all jammed! We can't get a message out!
:'''Peter Port''': Will ''somebody'' tell me what in the world is happening?!
''[An alarm siren begins to wail]''
:'''Automated Voice''': ALERT: INCOMING GRIMM ATTACK. THREAT LEVEL: 9. PLEASE SEEK SHELTER IN A CALM AND ORDERLY MANNER. 
''[The audience begins to panic and flee the stands. Ironwood bursts into the announcer's booth and grabs the microphone.]''
:'''James Ironwood''': Ladies and gentlemen, ''please'', there is no need for panic-
''[He is interrupted by a loud screech as a giant flying Grimm slams into the Dust shield atop the Colosseum.]''  
:'''Sun Wukong''': A Nevermore?!
:'''Coco Adel''': How'd it get past the Kingdom's defenses?!
:'''Lie Ren''': ''[grimly]'' It wasn't ''alone.''
''[As Oz grabs his cane, Glynda and Qrow burst into his office]''
:'''Qrow Branwen''': Oz-
:'''Professor Ozpin''': Get to the city!
:'''Qrow Branwen''': But-
:'''Professor Ozpin''': ''Now!''
''[He calls Ironwood's scroll, as more Grimm are shown stirring in Mountain Glenn]''
:'''James Ironwood''': Ozpin! The girl, I- I can explain-
:'''Professor Ozpin''': ''[sharply]'' You brought ''your'' Army to my Kingdom, James. ''Use it!''
----
:'''Atlesian Commander''': Dammit! ''[into his Scroll]'' This is Blue Four. Blues Two and Three, fall into defensive position!
:'''Atlesian Officer''': Roger! Blue Three, in position!
:'''Atlesian Commander''': Blue Two, what's your status?!
''[The bridge of Blue Two is shown full of sparking screens and dead Atlesians; an unseen officer walks past them, shown only below the waist, as alarms blare]''
:'''Atlesian Commander''': Blue Two, ''come in!'' Someone answer me, dammit!
''[The officer enters the ship's brig carrying an ornate parasol, revealed to be Neopolitan. Smirking, she opens one of the cells, twirling a familiar-looking bowler hat and cane in her other hand...]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[leans forward, grinning]'' Well... it's about ''time''.
''[Blue Two suddenly turns and fires its' cannons into Blue Four, sending it careening into Blue Three]''
:'''Atlesian Commander''': ''We're hit!'' What's going- ''[he is cut off by explosions as both ships crash into a cliff. Roman and Neo are shown standing on the bridge of Blue Two]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[laughs maniacally]'' Oh, it is ''good'' to be back!

===Battle of Beacon [Volume 3, Episode 10]===

''[After defeating the Nevermore]''
:'''Pyrrha''': Ruby... ''[In tears]'' I am ''so'' sorry!
:'''Ruby''': Me too... But it wasn't your fault.
:'''Jaune''': She's right. ''[Jaune bring Pyrrha's weapon to her]'' Whoever was on the microphone- they're the one that did this! And we have to make sure they don't take anyone else.
----
''[As Ironwood finishes killing a Beowulf Alpha, Ruby and her friends emerge from the Colosseum]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': What's going on?!
:'''James Ironwood''': Grimm are crawling all over the city. The White Fang has invaded Beacon, and to make matters worse, some... vagabond, has seized one of my ships. Until we regain command, the skies are out of our control. So I'm-
''[He raises his pistol, shooting down a Creep approaching the students from behind]''
:'''James Ironwood''': -Going to take it ''back.'' ''[moves to board his airship]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': What should ''we'' do?
:'''James Ironwood''': You have two choices. Defend your Kingdom, and your school... or save yourselves.
''[The students glance at each other]''
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[reassuringly]'' No one will fault you, if you leave. ''[to his android soldiers]'' Let's move out!
''[As his ship flies away, the students look at each other again]''
:'''Sun Wukong''': I mean... come on!

===Heroes and Monsters [Volume 3, Episode 11]===
''[As Ruby battles Neopolitan atop the Atlesian airship, Roman arrives and fires at her, knocking her across the deck; he approaches and leans over her]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[mockingly]'' Little Red, little Red.   You are just ''determined'' to be the hero of Vale, aren't'cha?
:'''Ruby Rose''': What are you doing?!  Without these ships, the Grimm will destroy everything!
:'''Roman Torchwick''': That's the plan! 
''[he aims Melodic Cudgel, but she knocks it sideways as he fires. Springing up, she dodges Neo's attack, staggers to the edge of the ship, then jumps back as a Nevermore swoops past.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': But why?  What do you ''get'' out of it?!
:'''Roman Torchwick''': You're asking the wrong questions, Red. It's not what I have to ''gain'', it's that I can't afford to ''lose!''
''[Ruby charges him, but Roman ducks as Neo vaults over his shoulder, forcing Ruby back. As Ruby slashes, Neo hooks Crescent Rose from her grip with Hush and spin-kicks her in the side. Roman ricochets Melodic Cudgel at Ruby, catches it and fires over his shoulder, blasting her off the ship; she catches onto Crescent Rose, embedded in its' side. She kicks at a Griffon that approaches her]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': I maybe a gambling man, but even ''I'' know there are some bets you ''just don't take.''
''[Neo extends Hush's rapier blade and drags it across the deck, throwing up sparks. As she approaches, Ruby notices a button on the parasol's handle]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Like it or not, the people who hired me are going to change the world!  You can't stop 'em, ''I'' can't stop em, and you know the old saying. &quot;If you can't beat 'em-&quot; 
''[Ruby lunges up and presses Hush's button, causing it to open, catch the wind, yank a shocked Neo off the ship and sweep her away]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[horrified] NEO!''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[climbing back up]'' I don't care what you say! We ''will'' stop them, and ''I'' will stop you! BET ON THAT!
''[As she speeds forward, Roman fires another Dust flare, scattering it with Melodic Cudgel's hook. As Ruby is thrown backward, he cane-clubs her, then fires again at point-blank range, knocking her down]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[Angrily, as he advances]'' You got spirit, kid. But this, is the ''REAL WORLD! [he clubs her again]'' The real world is ''COLD! [clubs her again]'' The ''real'' world, doesn't ''CARE'' about spirit! 
''[Ruby kicks him in the shin, and he jumps back, growling]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': You want to be a hero?! Then play the part, and ''DIE'' like every other Huntsman in history! [''He clubs her back down as she rises, not noticing that several Grimm are circling above them, drawn by his negative emotions]'' As for ''me'', I'll do what I do best: lie, steal, cheat... and ''SURVIVE!''
''[As he raises Melodic Cudgel again, a Griffon suddenly swoops down, seizes him in its' jaws, and devours him whole]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Blake has been knocked down while fighting Adam during the Battle of Beacon Academy]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': This could have been ''OUR'' day! Can't you see that?!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I never wanted ''this!'' I wanted equality- I wanted ''peace!''
''[She rises into a kneeling position and fires Gambol Shroud's pistol at Adam, but he blocks the shots with Wilt's blade, absorbing their energy]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': What you ''want'' is IMPOSSIBLE! ''[he backhands her across the face, knocking her down]'' But I understand. Because all I want... is ''you'', Blake. 
''[Blake raises her gun again, but Adam kicks it from her hand.]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': And, as I set out upon this world, to deliver the ''justice'' mankind so greatly deserves...''[crouches and gestures in her face]'' I will make it my mission, to destroy ''everything'' you love. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[nearby]'' Blake! Blake, where are you?!
''[Yang comes into view outside the broken window, decking a White Fang member. Adam quickly glances from her, to Blake's horrified expression]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': ...Starting with ''her''.

===End of the Beginning [Volume 3, Episode 12]===
''[After a prolonged battle, Cinder has disarmed Pyrrha, broken her Aura, and crippled her with an arrow through her heel. Circling her victim, she approaches, lifting her chin]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[smugly]'' It's a shame you were promised a power, that was ''never'' truly yours. But, take comfort in knowing, that ''I'' will use it, in ways you could never ''imagine.''
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': ''[pulls away from Cinder's grip, glaring at her]'' ...Do you believe in destiny?
''[Cinder's smile fades as she steps back, conjuring an obsidian bow and arrow with her Semblance]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ...''Yes.''
''[Just as Ruby reaches the top of the tower, Cinder fires her arrow into Pyrrha's chest. As Pyrrha convulses, Cinder approaches and touches her head, incinerating her with her Semblance until all that remains is Pyrrha's circlet, which she drops on the ground. Ruby watches this with an expression of horror and rage.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': '''PYRRHA!!!!!''' ''[A burst of white light shoots out of her eyes, causing the Grimm Dragon to screech in agony and freeze]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': WHAT?! ''[The light engulfs her as well]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Ruby awakens in her home at Patch, with her father sitting next to her bed, asleep. She groans as she sits up, awakening him]''
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': Ruby! ''[He moves next to her]'' You're awake!
:'''Ruby Rose''': What... happened?
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': ''[sighs]'' Your uncle Qrow found you, unconscious. He got you out of there, though, he brought you home safe.
:'''Ruby Rose''':... Wait! Yang! Is she alright?!
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': ''[his face falls]'' Uh...She's, uh... she's gonna be alright. I think she's just... I think it's just gonna take some time, for her to get used to things. ''[Ruby looks down, sadly]'' She's too strong, to let this stop her. ''[wipes his eyes and smiles]'' I'm just glad to have my girls back at home.
:'''Ruby Rose''': What happened to the school? And Vale! Were they able to clear out the Grimm?
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': Things at ''Vale'' are under control. But, the school? It's... it's not that simple. That thing, whatever it is, doesn't seem to be dead. Don't get me wrong, you... did a ''number'' on it...But, it's not disappearing. It's... kind of... ''frozen''. I know that doesn't sound too bad, but it keeps attracting more Grimm to the school.
:'''Ruby Rose''':... I did ''what?''
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': Hmmm?
:'''Ruby Rose''': You said, I did a number on it. What do you mean?
:'''Tiaying Xiao Long''': I... look, that's not important right now, we can talk about it later. Things are just... kind of a mess.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[from the doorway]'' It's ''always'' a mess. ''[swigs the last contents of his hip flask]'' Mind if we have a minute?
:'''Tiayang Xiao Long''': What, I can't stay here?
:'''Qrow Branwen''': Tai, please.
''[Taiyang sighs, leans over and kisses Ruby's forehead]''
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': I'm glad you're alright. I'll go make us some tea.
''[Tai leaves, shooting Qrow a dark look as he passes. Qrow drags a chair over and sits next to Ruby.]''
:'''Qrow Branwen''': So... how you feeling?
:'''Ruby Rose''': Um... I, kind of hurt... all over.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[chuckles, folds his arms]'' That makes sense, after what you did.
:'''Ruby Rose''': You guys keep saying that! That I ''did'' something. What are you talking about?!
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[leans forward]'' What's the last thing you remember?
:'''Ruby Rose''':... I ran up the side of the Tower. And when I got to the top, I- ''[gasps in horror]'' Pyrrha! Is she-
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[nods, softly]'' ...She's gone. ''[Ruby looks away]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tearfully]'' I... I got to the top, and I saw Pyrrha... ''[clenching her fists]'' And ''Cinder.'' And then, everything went white!
:'''Qrow Branwen''':... Anything else?
:'''Ruby Rose''': I remember... my head hurting.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': The night you met Ozpin... what was the first thing, he said to you?
:'''Ruby Rose''': I... I don't know. I think it was something about-
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''Silver eyes. [Ruby looks up]'' That's an ''extremely'' rare trait.
:'''Ruby Rose''': So?
:'''Qrow Branwen''':... You're special, Ruby. And ''not'' in the 'Daddy loves his special angel' kind of way. You're special the same way your ''Mom'' was. Remnant's full of legends and stories. Some of 'em true, some made up. But there's one Oz told me, from a very long time ago. Back before Huntsmen, before ''Kingdoms''. It was said that those with silver eyes, were destined to lead the life of a warrior. You see, the creatures of Grimm- the most fearsome monsters mankind had ever encountered- were ''afraid'', of those silver-eyed warriors. They were the best of the best. It was said that even a single ''look'' from one of these fighters, could strike a Grimm down. ''[smiles]'' It's a ridiculous story... 
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... you think that, I might be...
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[chuckles]'' Well, a giant monster's currently ''frozen'' on top of Beacon Tower... and ''you're'' here, safe in bed. ''[stands up, looks out the window]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Wait... Wait, how did ''you'' know what Ozpin said to me? The night we met.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': All those missions I go on, all those times I'm away, in some far-off place... It's been for Ozpin. But he's missing, now. Something's been set in motion... and with Oz gone, I'll have to pick up, where he left off.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Then what can ''I'' do? ''[Qrow turns back to her]'' If I'm so special, then I can help, right?
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[sighs]'' You really wanna help? Get some rest. You're in no condition to go anywhere, right now. ''[moves to the door, turns back briefly]'' Besides... our enemy's trail leads all the way, to ''Haven''. That'd be quite a trip for a pipsqueak like you. ''[winks at her as he leaves]'' Catch ya later, kiddo.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Yang is sitting in her bed staring out the window. Ruby quietly enters.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tentatively]'' Yang? ''[When Yang doesn't respond, she starts to leave]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...Ruby.
''[Ruby turn around to see Yang looking at her, eyes full of tears. She runs over and hugs her sister]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': I'm so glad you're okay!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...But I'm ''not''. ''[Ruby lets go, staring at the bandaged stump of Yang's arm]'' It's all ''gone. [her voice starts to break]'' The school...Penny... ''Pyrrha''... and... 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Yang, where are Weiss and Blake?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Weiss's father... came for her.
:'''Ruby Rose''': What?! What do you mean?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No one outside of Vale knows what happened here. Before the tower fell... The last thing people saw was Atlas attacking innocent people, and Grimm destroying the city. Everyone's scared. No one knows who to trust. So Weiss's father came to take her back to Atlas, where he ''thinks'' it's safe. She's gone.
:'''Ruby Rose''': What about-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': And ''Blake'' ran! ''[bitterly]'' Sun saw her go. After we got to the city... she just... ''ran!''
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... ''why?''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I don't know. ''[tears up, then turns away]'' And I don't ''care''.
:'''Ruby Rose''': There have to be a reason she-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No there ''doesn't!'' Sometimes bad things just happen, Ruby!
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[softly]'' ...So what do we do, now?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[coldly]'' You can do what you like. I'm gonna lie here.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Yang-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Just leave me alone.
''[Ruby goes to the door, turning back briefly]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[softly]'' I love you.
''[She leaves when Yang does not respond]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[As winter arrives, Ruby steps outside her house]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ...Hey.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Hey Jaune. ''[she approaches him]'' Haven's a long way to go.
:'''Jaune Arc''': I know. But it's the only lead we have.
:'''Ruby Rose''': And you're ''sure'' you wanna come along?
:'''Lie Ren''': The journey will be perilous... and whether we'll find answers at the end, is entirely uncertain.
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': But we wouldn't be here if we weren't up for it.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Then let's get started.
''[The four friends set off on the road for Haven]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': &quot;A smaller, more honest soul.&quot; It's true that a simple spark, can ignite hope. Breath ''fire'', into the hearts of the weary.
''[At home, Taiyang brings Ruby's breakfast, only to find a note. He drops the food and runs past Yang's room, where she is still staring out the window]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': The ability to derive strength from ''hope'', is undoubtedly mankind's greatest attribute. Which is why... I will focus ''all'' of my power... to ''snuff it out.''
''[A raven is seen outside Yang's window, watching her before it flies away]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': How does it feel? ''Knowing'', that ''all'' of your time and effort, has been for nothing? That your guardians, have ''failed'' you. That everything you've built, will be ''torn down'', before your very eyes.
''[At the ruins of Beacon Academy, more Grimm are shown approaching the ruined Tower and the petrified dragon atop it.]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': Your faith in mankind was ''not'' misplaced. When banded together, unified by a common enemy... they ''are'' a noticeable threat. ''[Glynda Goodwitch is shown repairing damage in Vale with her Semblance, visibly exhausted]'' But ''divide'' them... place ''doubt'' into their minds.  
''[Blake is shown fleeing across Beacon's rooftops, glancing back at the Tower and dragon]'' 
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': And any ''Semblance'' of power they once had, will wash away. 
''[Weiss is shown on an airship, looking sad. She glances from the window to her father, who is seated next to her, staring ahead coldly. Ruby and her friends are shown visiting her mother's grave before they move on]''
:'''Mysterious narrator''': Of course, they won't realize it at first. Like you, they'll ''cling'' to their fleeting hope, their aspirations. But this is merely the first move. So, you ''send'' your Guardians, your Huntsmen and Huntresses.
''[The scene shifts to the Land of Darkness. The camera zooms toward the Narrator on a cliff, revealing her as Salem]''
:'''Salem''': And when ''they'' fail, and you turn to your ''smaller soul''... know that you send her, to the same, ''pitiful'' demise. This is the beginning of the ''end'', Ozpin. ''[she turns around, her eyes glowing red]'' And I can't wait, to ''watch you burn.''

== Volume 4 ==

===The Next Step [Volume 4, Episode 1]===

:''[Cinder speaks in unintelligible, hoarse whispers to Emerald]''

:'''Dr. Watts''': Pathetic. Why'd you even-?

:''[The door opens. Watts, Cinder, Hazel, and Tyrian all stand. Salem enters, moves to the head of the table, and turns to face them]''
:'''Salem''': Watts...Do you find such malignancy necessary? ''[She gestures for them to sit.]''
:'''Dr. Watts''': I apologize, ma'am. I'm not particularly fond of failure.
:'''Salem''': ''[sits]'' Then I see no reason for your cruelty towards young Cinder. She's become our Fall Maiden, destroyed Beacon Tower, and most importantly...killed dear Ozpin. So, I'm curious; to what failures are you referring?
:'''Dr. Watts''': Well, the girl with silver eyes.
:'''Hazel''': Yes. We dealt with her kind before. How's it a novice was able to best one of us?
:'''Dr. Watts''': My thoughts exactly. Even without her new power, it should've been effortless.
:'''Salem''': It is ''because'' of the Maiden's power. Make no mistake, Cinder, you hold the key to our victory. But, your newfound strength brings with it a crippling weakness. Which is why you will remain by my side as we continue your treatment. ''[Cinder snarls in disappointment]'' Dr. Watts, you are to take Cinder's place, and meet with our informant in Mistral. 
:'''Dr. Watts''': Very good.
:'''Salem''': Tyrian, I want you to continue your hunt for the Spring Maiden. 
:'''Tyrian''': ''[Gives a gleeful chuckle]'' Gladly.
:'''Salem''': And Hazel, I'm sending you to the leader of the White Fang. Adam Taurus has arranged the meeting. The boy continues to prove loyal. Ensure that Sienna Khan feels the same way. 
:'''Hazel''': As you wish. 
:''[Cinder raises her hand, and looks at Emerald]''
:'''Emerald''': Oh. ''[Leans in to Cinder. Cinder whispers to her again, and Emerald stands up]''
:'''Salem''': Speak, child.
:'''Emerald''': She wants to know...&quot;What about the girl?&quot;
:'''Dr. Watts''': ''[Scoffs]'' What about her? Seems to me that this is Cinder's problem, not ours. 
''[Cinder slams her fist on the table and glares at Watts, who smirks]''
:'''Salem''': That's enough. Tyrian?
:'''Tyrian''': ''[grins]'' yes, my lady?
:'''Salem''': Spring can wait. Find the girl that did this to Cinder...''[Tyrian gleefully giggles and claps]'' And bring her to me. ''[Tyrian frowns in disappointment]'' Because of your efforts, Beacon has fallen...and 'Haven'', will be next. 
:'''Tyrian''': ''[gesturns to Cinder]'' And eye for an eye...
''[he dissolves into a fit of maniacal laughter]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nora''': I'm just saying, there's more members of JNPR on this team than RWBY. It just makes sense to go with ''that'' one! 
:'''Ren''': But JNRR isn't a color.
:'''Nora''': ''[Groans]'' How can I be more clear?! ''[Holds her hand up, and an image of JNRR appears]'' One, two, three! That's ''more'' than one!
:'''Ren''': But, we're helping Ruby with her objective. ''[Holds his hand up, and an image of RNJR appears]'' Wouldn't that make her the leader?
:'''Jaune''': ''[On lookout]'' Guys, we need to focus...Also, JNRR is way cooler. 
:'''Nora''': EXACTLY!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Blacksmith finishes creating Jaune new armor]''
:'''Blacksmith''': There you go, son! It's gonna be heavier than you're used to... But you'll thank me the next time you go up against a set of claws! 
:'''Jaune''': Wow... I... I don't know what to say.
:'''Blacksmith''': Don't gotta say anything! Just put it on! I'll go get the rest.
:'''Nora''': So, what are you waiting for?!
:'''Jaune''': Oh...! Right! ''[Removing his old armor]'' Guess I was... Gonna grow out of it eventually...
:'''Ren''': A sign of progress.
:'''Jaune''': Progress. 
''[As Jaune turns around, Ruby gasps, then snickers]''
:'''Jaune''': Whuh... What is it?
:'''Ruby''': ''[Pointing at Jaune's hoodie]'' What is THAT?!
:'''Jaune''': ''[Jaune's hoodie has a picture of a bunny on it]'' What, my hoodie? I've always had this!
:'''Ruby''': ''[Again snickering]'' IT GOT A CUTE LITTLE BUNNY RABBIT! ''[Starting to laugh]''
:'''Jaune''': It's Pumpkin Pete! Y'know from the cereal?
:'''Ruby''': ''[Continue to laugh]'' What did you do?! Send in a boxtop for a prize?!  
:'''Jaune''': Yeah! 50!
''[Ruby, after a pause, laughs even louder, before falling over.]''
:'''Ruby''': Ah... Ha-ha-ha... Heh...
:'''Ren''': Well... I suppose we don't have to grow out of everything.
===Remembrance [Volume 4, Chapter 2]===
:'''Ruby''': So, the next town is... ''[continues looking at the map]'' Uh-huh! Uh-huh... ''[stops looking at the map]'' We're lost.
:'''Jaune''': We're not lost! The next town is Shion. My family used to visit it all the time.
:'''Ruby''': Oh, yeah! Don't you have, like four sisters?
:'''Jaune''': Uh, seven.
''[Ruby giggles]''
:'''Nora''': Y'know, that actually explain a lot.
:'''Jaune''': Wait, what do you mean--
:'''Ruby''': SO, what did you guys do there?
:'''Jaune''': OH! All sorts of stuff! Over here is a great hiking trail, and over here is where we went to camping all the time! I got my own tent because I was special. Also, so my sisters would stop braiding my hair.
:'''Ruby''': Didn't like the look?
:'''Jaune''': Yeah, they just keep doing pigtails, but personally I think I'm more of a &quot;Warrior's Wolf Tail&quot; kind of guy. 
:'''Ruby''': That's just a ponytail.
:'''Jaune''': I stand by what I said.
===Of Runaways and Stowaways [Volume 4, Chapter 3]===
:''[Blake tries to defend the ship from a Grimm sea monster. A cloaked figure suddenly rushes past her and leaps at the monster. The cloak flies off, revealing...]''
:'''Blake''': SUN?!
:'''Sun''': ''[Uses his Semblance to help grab the monster's head, as he tries to corral it, keeping the monster from firing on the ship]'' Not today, pal!
:'''Blake''': What are you doing?!
:'''Sun''': ''[As the monster starts flying in random directions, trying to throw him off]'' Oh, just...you know...hanging out! ''[The monster finally throws him off. As Sun starts to fall, Blake swings herself off the ship and catches him, landing on a small island, holding Sun in her arms]'' My hero.
:'''Blake''': You're not supposed to be here!
:'''Sun''': Yeah? Well, it looks like you need all the help you can get.
:'''Blake''': UGH! ''[Drops Sun unceremoniously]'' Just shut up and fight!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sun''': ''[After the Grimm monster is defeated, some Faunus passengers thank him]'' Seriously, it was no big deal. Just enjoy the rest of your trip, and everything will be cool. We got this! ''[Turns back to Blake]'' You'd think they've never seen a fight before.
:'''Blake''': What are you even doing here, Sun?
:'''Sun''': Digging the new outfit, by the way. ''[Points to her cat ears]'' Never did like the bow. 
:'''Blake''': ''[Slaps Sun's hand away]'' SUN!
:'''Sun''': Jeez.
:'''Blake''': Have you been following me?!
:'''Sun''': ''[Sighs]'' I saw you run off. The night Beacon Tower fell. Once we landed in Vale, you made sure everyone was okay, then you just took off, without saying anything. 
:'''Blake''': I had to. You wouldn't understand.
:'''Sun''': No, I get it. The moment you left, I knew exactly what you were doing: You're going on a one-woman rampage against the White Fang!
:'''Blake''': ...WHAT?
:'''Sun''': You always felt like the Fang was your fight. They show up, trash your school, hurt your friends; it makes perfect sense. 
:'''Blake''': I can't believe you. 
:'''Sun''': So, there's no way I'm letting you do this alone! It's an honorable approach for sure, but you're going to need someone watching your back, and that's where I come in! Us Faunus got to stick together, after all. 
:'''Blake''': ''[Shoves Sun away]'' You're wrong, Sun. You're so, so wrong. 
:'''Sun''': What do you-?
:'''Blake''': I'm not going anywhere near the White Fang. Not yet. 
:'''Sun''': Seriously?
:'''Blake''': I need to sort some things out. 
:'''Sun''': Then, why not do it with your team, your friends?
:'''Blake''': You're one to talk! Assuming Neptune, Sage, and Scarlet aren't hiding below deck.
:'''Sun''': You ''really'' think I can get Neptune on the ocean?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Salem''': Cinder, I'm going to ask you this just one more time, and I expect a clear answer. Did you...kill...Ozpin? ''[Cinder starts to raise her hand for Emerald] NO!'' I want to hear ''you'' say it. 
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[Gives a rasping inhale, then, with great effort]'' ...Yes.
:'''Salem''': ''[After a pause, turns to the Grimm orb floating next to her]'' Reinforce our forces at Beacon. The relic ''is'' there. ''[After the orb leaves, she ponders to herself]'' What are you planning?

===Family [Volume 4, Episode 4]===
:'''Taiyang''': Adult or not, you still have a long way to go before you're ready for the real world.
:'''Yang''': ''[Annoyed]'' Oh my gosh, does ''every'' father figure just have the same three condescending phrases?
:'''Taiyang''': Yeah, but we only use them when we mean it!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Prof. Port''': Fear is like any other emotion; it comes and goes. It's all in how we handle it. Why, even I wrestle with that emotion from time to time.
:'''Yang''': Really? You?
:'''Dr. Oobleck''': ''[Aside to Yang]'' He's afraid of mice.
:'''Prof. Port''': THEY ONLY BRING DISEASE AND FAMINE! ''[Yang starts quietly laughing]'' And don't even get me started on their tail! So hairless, it's simply unnatural!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Raven''': Hello, brother.
:'''Qrow''': ...Raven. ''[Goes to the table she's sitting at. He gives her a look, and after a pause, Raven pulls her mask aside, allowing him to sit with his drink.]'' So, what do you want?
:'''Raven''': A girl can't just catch up with her family?
:'''Qrow''': She can, but you're not. Now, how about we get on with it? ''[Takes a sip of his drink]'' Unless you plan on keeping these coming.
:'''Raven''': Does she have it?
:'''Qrow''': ...Did you know Yang lost her arm?
:'''Raven''': That's not-
:'''Qrow''': Rhetorical question, I know you know. It's just obnoxious that you bring up family, then just carry on like your own daughter doesn't exist. 
:'''Raven''': I saved her!
:'''Qrow''': Once, because that was your rule, right? Real &quot;Mom of the Year&quot; material, sis.

== Volume 5 ==
 
===Dread In The Air [Volume 5, Episode 2]===
:'''Dr. Watts''': I'm still so fascinated by this creature.  Cinder, dear, are we coming through?  Can you see us clearly?  Well, as clearly as you can.
:'''Cinder''': Shut... up!
:'''Dr. Watts''': Oh, goody.  You've recovered.

===Lighting the Fire [Volume 5, Episode 4]===
''[Yang is brought into the Branwen tribe camp, waiting in front of the main tent under guard as a masked Raven cautiously exits]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Mom.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[Removes her mask and sets it aside]'' Yang... So,  after all this time, you've finally decided to visit me.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Reaches down and holds her shaking hand]'' You ''know'' that I searched for you. I spent years looking for you.
:'''Raven Branwen''': And you found me. You were patient, determined, and strong enough to make your dream a reality. ''[Smiles]'' Well done, Yang. But did you have to be so rough with my men?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I didn't want a fight. ''They'' started it. ''[Crosses her arms]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': Well, you certainly ''finished'' it.
''[Yang simply gives an unamused stare back at Raven.]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': Right... I'm sure this is all very overwhelming, but I must admit that you've proven yourself, so any questions you have, I'll be happy to answer. You can stay with us tonight; I'll even have the cooks whip up something for you.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': That's not why I'm here.
''[Raven's friendly facade falls. The bandits gathered around Yang chatter amongst themselves but soon fall quiet when a slight wind gust arrives.]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''What was that?''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I'm not here for ''you''. Ruby is somewhere in Mistral – she's with Qrow and she's going to need my help. I just need ''you'' to take me to her.
:'''Raven Branwen''': And why would I do that?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Sarcastically]'' Because we're family.
:'''Raven Branwen''': Family... only coming around when they need something. ''[moves back toward the tent entrance]'' I have to say, I'm disappointed. After all, you found ''me'' didn't you? Why not take that drive and use it to find your little sister if she really means that much to you?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Because ''you're'' going to save me time. Ruby was heading to Mistral, but there's no guarantee she's made it there. Looking for her in Anima could take ages. But... Dad told me how your Semblance works.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[Surprised, muttering under her breath]'' ''Tai...''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Smirks]'' You could bond to certain people. And when you do, you could create a portal that takes you straight to them. You've got one for Dad, one for me... and you've got one for ''Qrow''. He promised me he'd watch out for Ruby before he left, and I trust him. So, make a portal to my uncle and sister, and I'll be on my way.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ...You know, it takes real strength to march in here and demand such a favor of me; I've got to say, I'm impressed. It's very ''noble'' to want to help out your sister. But if she's with Qrow, then she's already a lost cause. ''[Looks away]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': What does ''that'' mean?
:'''Raven Branwen''': You don't want to get mixed up in all of that, Yang. Ozpin is not the man you think he is, and Qrow is a fool for trusting him. ''[Turns back toward Yang]'' I would know; I trusted him once, too.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I don't care what you think!
''[Vernal watches off to the side of the crowd with Weiss' weapon.]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': Your choice is your own. All I'm suggesting is that instead of getting wrapped up in something too big for you – for ''any'' of us – that maybe you take a moment to wonder if you're already where you belong.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Steps forward]'' Save your breath. You can spout off whatever you want, but NOTHING is going to keep me from my sister.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[Eyes widen for a moment, before she callously smirks]'' Well, aren't you stubborn?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I get it from my ''mom''.

===Alone Together [Volume 5, Episode 8]===
:'''Yang''': I know she's our teammate. But I'm not just going to change my mind. I'm sorry. I just...I don't think you know what it's like to be left. You have a giant family. Recitals to perform. Dinners to attend. I didn't have any of that. My Mom left me. Ruby's Mom left too. Tai was always busy with school and Ruby couldn't even talk yet. I had to pick up the pieces. I had to keep things together. Alone. Weiss, if you have something to say, then say it.
:'''Weiss''': When I was ten, my Dad finally admitted to my Mom that the only reason he married her was for the family name. It was actually on my birthday. He missed the big dinner, she got mad, he finally snapped. I think she already knew. Looking back, I think I knew too. But hearing him say it finally pushed her over the edge. First it was separate lunches and dinners. Opposite balconies at my recitals. A glass of wine here, a glass of wine there. Then, it was no dinners. No recitals. A bottle of wine here...you get the idea.
:'''Yang''': I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed.
:'''Weiss''': You're right, though. I don't know loneliness like you do. I have my own version.  And I'll bet Blake has her own version too.
:'''Yang''': She doesn't have to be alone. I was here for her! We all were! She chose to leave us!
:'''Weiss''': Why do you think she did that? The entire time Blake was at Beacon, she was afraid to open up to people. She tried to keep her past separate from us. She tried to protect us. Eventually those walls she put up came down. And the moment they did, the one thing she was afraid of actually happened. The universe proved her right.
:'''Yang''': No one blamed her for anything! If she'd just talked us she would've known that! How can I be there for her if she won't let me? What if I need her here for me?

===Vault of the Spring Maiden [Volume 5, Episode 12]===
''[As Vernal, Cinder and Raven enter the Vault, blossoms from its' tree begin to float down around them]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': Having fun?
:'''Raven Branwen''': Vernal, stay focused.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Oh, come now, Raven. Let her enjoy this. It's a once-in-a-lifetime experience.
:'''Vernal''': How does this work?
:'''Cinder Fall''': Once the Spring Maiden places her hand on the door... it will open. For you... and ''only'' you.  Then ''I'' will walk into the Vault, and retrieve the Relic. No one else. Is that ''clear?''
:'''Vernal''': Yes.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[impatiently]'' It doesn't matter to us. Let's get this over with.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Alright then. Vernal, when you're ready. ''[Vernal approaches the door; Raven reaches slowly for her sword, but stops when Cinder speaks]'' You know... I've heard ''so'' many stories about you, Raven. They say you're a cunning leader. That you're ''strong''. That you're ''clever. [Vernal reaches for the door as Cinder glances back at Raven]'' It's a ''shame'' that they're wrong. 
''[Cinder suddenly casts a bolt of magic from her hand at Raven]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''VERNAL!''
''[She lunges forward, but is encased in ice. Vernal draws her weapons and whirls around, then gasps in pain as she's thrust against the door. She stares down at a Grimm arm stretching from Cinder's crippled shoulder, its' claws impaling her stomach]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[Smiles]'' It's nothing personal, dear. ''[she approaches]'' You're just not ''worthy'' of such power. But ''I'' am. 
''[She throws Vernal to the floor, causing her to scream in agony. Behind them, the ice around Raven starts to crack]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': So, I will ''take''... what is ''mine. [Vernal's struggles weaken, but Cinder's smirk changes to confusion]'' What... what is this? Where's the power?!
''[The ice shatters behind Cinder. She turns to see Raven standing ready, bluish aura flickering around her]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': You won't find it. ''[She pulls off her mask and throws it aside]'' Because Vernal ''isn't'' the Spring Maiden. ''[She raises her face, Maiden flames wreathing her eyes] I'' AM!

== Volume 6 ==

===The Coming Storm [Volume 6, Episode 5]===
:'''Ruby''': Look!  ''[rushes over to a shelf]''
:'''Weiss''': What is it?
:'''Ruby''': ''[shows Weiss canned beans]'' Food!
:'''Weiss''': ''Canned'' food?
:'''Ruby''': Oh, trust me.  You put enough salt on anything and it'll taste just fine.
:'''Weiss''': I suppose it's better than nothing. ''[she and Ruby pick up some cans from the cellar]'' But I still hate this place.
''[They leave, but the door to the nearby wine cellar lifts up and then goes back down again, making an ominous creak.]''
 
===Seeing Red [Volume 6, Episode 12]===
:'''Adam''': You knew you couldn't win two on one at Haven.  What makes you so sure you can win now?
:'''Blake''': I don't have a choice.  I have people who actually care about me!  And I promised that I would never leave them again!  So I'm not dying now!
:'''Adam''': You know, she made a promise to me once... that she'd always be at ''my'' side.  And look how well she's kept it.
:'''Yang''': Did she make that promise to you?  Or to the person you were pretending to be?
:'''Adam''': So I just wasn't good enough for you.
:'''Blake''': You know it's so much more than that.
:'''Adam''': I know you've made your choice.  And I've made mine.

===Our Way [Volume 6, Episode 13]===
:''[In the Land of Darkness, Mercury Black is seen looking out the window in the meeting room. Emerald Sustrai then walks in.]''
:'''Emerald''': Mercury, I wanted to... ''[suddenly, she notices Mercury's face has an expression of horror as he looks out the window. She looks to where he's looking]'' What is she doing?
:''[A Beringel is seen crawling out of one of the black, tar-like pits, with Salem herself standing close by. Having learned about Adam Tarus' death, she then uses her magic as Nevermore wings suddenly sprout from the back of the Beringel. The Beringel gets used to its new appendages, before flying up to join many other Beringels also grafted with wings. Emerald and Mercury continue to watch in horror.]''
:'''Hazel''': There's an old saying. ''[the two notice him enter the room and stands next to them]'' If you want something done right... '''do it yourself.'''
:''[Salem looks up to the army of Grimm she has gathered, before turning around and using her magic on the black pools again, engulfing the entire scene...]''

== Volume 7 ==

===The Greatest Kingdom [Volume 7, Episode 1]===

===A New Approach [Volume 7, Episode 2]===

===Ace Operatives [Volume 7, Episode 3]===

===Pomp And Circumstance [Volume 7, Episode 4]===
:'''Jacques Schnee''': ''[glances at the rest of Team RWBY surrounding Weiss]'' So these are the little friends you threw everything away for?
:'''Weiss''': ''[shakes her head]'' Not friends. ''Family.''

===Sparks [Volume 7, Episode 5]===

===A Night Off [Volume 7, Episode 6]===

===Worst Case Scenario [Volume 7, Episode 7]===

===Cordially Invited [Volume 7, Episode 8]===

===As Above, So Below [Volume 7, Episode 9]===

===Out In The Open [Volume 7, Episode 10]===

===Gravity [Volume 7, Episode 11]===
:'''James Ironwood''': I will sacrifice... ''whatever it takes'', to stop her!
:'''Arthur Watts''': Oh, I hope you ''do'', James. ''[spits blood and smirks]'' I really hope you do.
----
''[A Seer Grimm bursts from Watt's bag, levitating into the air]''
:'''Salem''': General Ironwood.
''[The Seer cracks open, then collapses, dead. Smoke pours out, forming an image of Salem]''
:'''Salem''': The brave Huntsmen and Huntresses ''bested'' Arthur Watts. Congratulations.
:'''Ruby Rose''': We stopped Tyrian, too. And we'll stop Cinder, and anyone else you try to send here.
:'''Salem''': Dear girl, their goal was ''never'' victory. It was merely to set the stage.
:'''James Ironwood''': For what?!
:'''Salem''': ''[Turns]'' ...For ''me. [Ironwood backs away, stunned, as Salem  drifts toward him]'' Time isn't on your side, James. It's ''always'', been on mine. The people of Atlas have suffered enough! Surrender the Staff, and the Lamp, to me... and they needn't suffer any further.
:'''James Ironwood''': That's... ''Not'', going to happen.
:'''Salem''': ''[leans forward, smiling softly]'' Simply accept the futility, of your situation... and this can all be ''over''.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[Firmly]'' We've seen what ''you're'' capable of. The Lamp showed us. ''[Salem's smile vanishes; she straightens, glaring down at Ruby, who stares back defiantly ]'' It showed us ''everything''. We've seen that you can't be killed. But we've also seen you ''fail.'' We don't have to kill you, to stop you... and we ''will'' stop you.
:'''Salem''': ...Your ''mother'', said those words to me.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[stunned, as visions of Summer are shown]'' My... mother?
:'''Salem''': ''She'' was wrong, too.
''[Ruby's silver eyes flash. Still envisioning her mother, she crumples to her knees in tears, clutching her head; Yang rushes to her side. After a moment, Salem disappears.]''
----
:'''Marrow Amin''': ''That's'' Salem?! That's who we're up against?!
:'''Harriet Bree''': And she's apparently on her way.
:'''Elm Elderne''': But... we'd be alerted if any forces had approached the kingdom! We have long-range proximity alarms all along the coast, and-
:'''Vine Zeki''': ''[checks his scroll]'' They're offline. With all of the chaos, we didn't notice.
:'''Marrow Amin''': Watts must have shut them down!
:'''James Ironwood''': Or, they've already been destroyed. ''[walks to his desk and stares out over Atlas Academy]''
:'''Elm Elderne''': What... ''all'' of them?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You said in your speech, that Amity Tower was ready to launch. Was that ''true?'' ''[Ironwood does not answer, Blake and Weiss look at each other]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''No.'' You just ''said'' that, to lure out Watts.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': General... Ironwood?
:'''James Ironwood''':  ...I've sent your sister, to claim the power of the Winter Maiden.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[gasps] What?''
:'''James Ironwood''': When I realized we'd been compromised, I knew we couldn't wait any longer. The Staff and the Lamp, ''have'' to be locked away.
:'''Ruby Rose''': I thought... you said we could keep it.
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[turns, angrily]'' Well, that was before you ''lied'' to me about the Lamp. Before you lied to us about Robyn, before ''Salem'' was right on our doorstep. Before Mantle was nearly ''destroyed'', and myself and my army were left exhausted! ''[he slams Watt's bag off the desk, then sets his gun down and picks up Cinder's chess piece]'' The timeline has changed, and we must change accordingly.
:'''Harriet Bree''': What are our orders, sir?
:'''James Ironwood''': We are going to take our plan for Amity Tower, and apply it to the city of Atlas. ''[crushes the chess piece in his mechanical hand]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[stands up]'' What?!
:'''James Ironwood''': It was Oz's plan, in a former life... but he didn't ''take'' it far enough. If we harness the power of the Staff, and raise ourselves high into the atmosphere, the city's artificial climate will keep citizens and food supplies unharmed. Always out of reach, of whatever Salem may try to send our way.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': But we're ''nowhere'' near finished evacuating everyone! You'd be leaving Mantle to ''die.''
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[coldly]'' Yes... I would. ''[Team RWBY stares at him, stunned]'' ''We can't allow Salem to capture the Relics.'' This is our best chance, at getting the Staff, the Lamp ''and'' the Maiden, as far away from her as possible.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... we have an opportunity to reunite the ''world!'' If we launch the tower, we can all work together again! We could even call for help... If we can hold out long enough-
:'''James Ironwood''': Sometimes, doing the right thing... means making tough decisions.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You're right. And ''I'' think, the right thing to do, would be to ''stand our ground.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Me, too.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Me, too.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Me, too. ''[She glances at the Ace-Ops, but they all look away]''
:'''Harriet Bree''': ...We ran ourselves ragged, trying to save Mantle tonight. We try that again, against an even stronger force-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': But you're Huntsmen and Huntresses! You can't just back down from a fight!
:'''Vine Zeki''': You can't focus on one single fight, while trying to win a war.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': What's the Council going to say?
:'''James Ironwood''': ''Nothing.'' Once I declare martial law.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[horrified] No...''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': What about Robyn?
:'''Elm Elderne''': Who exactly are you ''loyal'' to?
:'''Ruby Rose''': We're loyal to the people, ''counting'' on us to save them!
:'''James Ironwood''': We are saving who we ''can. [Ruby looks back at him]''  And ''you're'' standing in our way.
''[Ruby's scroll suddenly rings]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': It's Jaune! We have got a ''serious'' problem here!
''[Ruby and Ironwood stare each other down. Before Ironwood can move, Ruby flies behind the desk with her Semblance and opens a conference call to Jaune, Qrow and Winter]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Ironwood's declaring martial law, and abandoning Mantle! Salem is coming, and he's going to use the Staff to move Atlas! If we don't stop him, Mantle's going to be des- ''[her call is suddenly cut off by Ironwood]'' What?! No!
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[Walks toward the door]'' I'm sorry it's come to this. But until Atlas and the Relics are safe, you are ''all'' under arrest.
:'''Ruby Rose''': We won't just let you take us.
''[The Ace-Ops form ranks opposite Team RWBY, blocking their way out]''
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[softly]'' I know.
''[He leaves]''

===With Friends Like These [Volume 7, Episode 12]===

===The Enemy of Trust [Volume 7, Episode 13]===
:'''James Ironwood''': Winter. Thank you. I know that must have been difficult. I... I'm so sorry- ''[he turns around and sees Oscar descending into the Vault]'' And... whom do I have the pleasure of speaking with?
:'''Oscar Pine''': Still just me. ''[steps toward him]''
:'''James Ironwood''': It was smart of you not to bring the Lamp, down here. ''I'' wouldn't trust me either, right now.
:'''Oscar Pine''': Trust... is what I'm hoping to fix. I ''know'' we can still figure this out, all of it. Together. ''Please.''
:'''James Ironwood''': ...Do you intend to ''fight'' me?
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[glances at Long Memory]'' No. That's just what she wants. I guess it's because of Oz, but... holding it helps calm me down when I'm afraid. ''[He collapses the cane and clips it to his belt]''
:'''James Ironwood''': You still think ''I'm'' afraid?
:'''Oscar Pine''': We ''all'' are. It's what we ''do'' in our fear, that-
:'''James Ironwood''': THAT'S EASY FOR ''YOU'' TO SAY! You can label me whatever you like, but the fact of the matter is, I was ''RIGHT!'' The ''minute'' I softened, let my guard down, ''that's'' when Salem had her opening.
:'''Oscar Pine''': If you abandon Mantle, you abandon our best chance to reunite the world, you abandon Remnant, leaving ''millions'' to fend for themselves so a few can survive! What kind of-
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[scornfully]'' All ''excellent'' philosophical points, that ''won't matter'', if Salem wins.
:'''Oscar Pine''': Listen to me!
:'''James Ironwood''': No, ''YOU'' listen! ''[He advances aggressively; Oscar steps back, toward the edge of the path]'' I am ''done'', letting others' inability to see the bigger picture, get in the way of doing what's ''right.'' Robyn, the Council, this Kingdom. Even ''you''.
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[sharply]'' Then you're as dangerous as ''she'' is, James.
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[coldly]'' &quot;James&quot;... is what my ''friends'' call me. To you... it's &quot;General.&quot;
''[He draws his pistol and shoots Oscar in the side, knocking him into the abyss]''
-----
''[Ozpin addresses the audience as the final scenes are shown.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': The single quality that is common across every living creature on this planet... is fear. 
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Winter! ''[she rushes to her injured sister's side]''
:'''Winter Schnee''': What... did you ''do?!''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': It's funny, then, that as common as fear is... we so easily underestimate its' power.
''[The Maiden flames in Penny's eyes go out as she checks Fria's pulse. Realizing she's dead, Penny covers her face with her hands]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Are you all right? Penny, what happened?
:'''Penny Polendina''': She's... ''gone.''
:'''Winter Schnee''': No. She's a part of ''you,'' now.
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Fear of growing close to someone.
''[The Atlesian military arrests Robyn and Qrow as he stares mournfully at Clover's blodied badge; Robyn puts her hands on his shoulder.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': A subsequent fear, of loss.
''[Cinder flies away from Atlas Academy, screaming with rage over her defeat by Winter, Penny and Ruby.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Fear of failure.
''[Yang, Blake, Maria and Pietro pick up Team JNPR and fly away]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Where's Oscar? And the Relic? ''[Jaune, Nora and Ren look away]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': And, as more people depend on you... those fears can take on greater power. But, fear itself, isn't worthy of concern. 
''[As he falls below Atlas, Oscar clips Ozpin's cane to his belt.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': It is who we ''become'', while in its' clutches.
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[wincing]'' I suggest you all surrender... and comply with the General's orders.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[sadly]'' ...We can't do that.
:'''Winter Schnee''': Then... I suggest you ''run.''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': No, you're hurt! I'm not going to leave you like this-
:'''Winter Schnee''': You're ''not'' leaving me! ''[softly]'' I'm giving ''you''... a head start. ''[into her earpice]'' This is Special Operative Schnee, in need of immediate medical assistance. Send reinforcements... Over.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ... We all have to carve out our own way.
''[Maria's airship arrives]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Guys! You're- ''[she breaks off when she sees them]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': We need to ''go.''
''[She and Weiss board the airship. After a glance at Winter, Penny follows them]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Will ''you'' be proud, of that person? Will you forgive them?
''[On the airship, Ruby and Weiss both embrace Penny; Pietro smiles proudly as he watches them]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Will you understand, why they felt the need to do the things they did? 
''[On a rooftop in Atlas, Cinder turns to see Neo, who bows and offers the Lamp; Cinder snatches it and brushes past, Neo looking after her with surprise and irritation.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Will you even recognize them?
''[In the Vault of the Winter Maiden, Ironwood receives a text from Winter: IT'S GONE. He lets out a roar of anger.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''':Or will the person staring back at you be the very thing you should have feared from the start?
''[In an Atlesian cell, Watts notices stormclouds growing on the horizon and smiles menacingly]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': I suppose we all find out, sooner or later.
''[Oscar lets out a cry and conjures a forcefield around himself, cushioning his landing in the crater below Atlas.]''
:'''Oscar Pine''': That power... these memories... you're back, aren't you? You saved me.
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Actually... ''you'', saved us. ''[thunder rumbles]'' Oscar, I-
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''Stop.'' All I want to know, is how we save Atlas next.
''[As the heroes' airship flies away from Atlas, the storm on the horizon intensifies]''
:'''Atlesian soldier #1''': We've got multiple hostiles on radar! Is anyone else seeing this?!
:'''Atlesian Soldier #2''': These readings ''can't'' be right.
''[A dark silhouette emerges from the clouds: a gigantic whale Grimm suspended by Gravity Dust on its' back, with other Grimm flying around it. The camera zooms in to show Salem standing atop its' head, smiling confidently.]''

== Volume 8 ==

===Divide [Volume 8, Episode 1]===
''[Neopolitan and Cinder enter Salem's throne room in Monstra]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[kneels]'' My Queen.
''[Salem rises and turns to face them]''
:'''Salem''': ''...Cinder.'' When I chose you as my vessel for the Maidens, I put my trust in you. So I ''trust'', that you wouldn't ''possibly'' return to me, empty-handed?
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[holds out the Lamp]'' The Relic of Knowledge. I took it right from under Ironwood's nose.
''[Salem stares at the Relic, while Neo shoots Cinder a look of scornful irritation]''
:'''Tyrian Callows''': ''[enters the chamber]'' Outsmarting the General speaks less to ''your'' intellect, and...more to ''his.'' After all, ''you'' were outsmarted by those children, ''first.''
:'''Cinder Fall''': And according to radio chatter, that ''same'' General and his forces, outsmarted ''you''. A shame Watts never made it back.
:'''Tyrian Callows''': I'm afraid the doctor was a ''necessary'' sacrifice. ''[gestures at Neo]'' I do hope ''this'' little one doesn't become another.
''[Neo glares at him as Cinder stands and gives the Lamp to Salem, who watches them curiously.]''
:'''Salem''': ... Who is she?
:'''Cinder Fall''': Neopolitan has some ''very'' useful abilities, and has proven to be a valuable asset. 
''[Neo looks offended]''
:'''Salem''': Hmm. You certainly do enjoy collecting ''assets''.
''[Another door opens, and Hazel, Mercury and Emerald enter. Emerald brightens on seeing Cinder, hurrying forward]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''Cinder.'' You're here! I knew you'd come-
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''Quiet.'' 
''[Emerald stops, looking confused]''
:'''Tyrian Callows''': ''[tsks]'' Mmm- ''So'' devoted, to someone so incompetent. While the good doctor and I were advancing the will of our Goddess, ''dismembering'' the very body of this kingdom... ''you'', were merely atoning for past ''failures.''
:'''Cinder Fall''': Polendina's creation ''interfered'', with the transfer of the Winter Maiden power. But, now I know she ''has'' it, and once I return to Atlas, it won't take long to finish what I started. That power, ''will'' be mine-
''[Salem raises her hand, and Cinder breaks off.]''
:'''Salem''': I've given ''no'' such command. ''[turns back to her throne]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[incredulous]'' Ma'am, now is the time to-
''[Salem touches her throne, sending a pulse of energy through Monstra; the fluid in its' brain clears, revealing Atlas in front of them]''
:'''Salem''': This game, is not yours to win, Cinder. It's ''mine.'' Just because you're more valuable to me than a pawn, does ''not'' make you a player. Everything is already in motion. All you need concern yourself with, is your ability to ''act'', when I tell you to.
:'''Cinder Fall''': ...Of course. ''[bows her head] Without you, I am nothing.''
''[After a pause, Salem waves them away]''
-----
''[Ruby, Weiss and Oscar enter an abandoned bar, where their various allies are watching the news. A TV shows Team RWBY, JNR, Penny, Pietro and Maria as wanted fugitives]''
:'''May Marigold''': I know, Sector Three is going to need the ''most'' help. I'm sending backup your way right now. Fiona, do you copy? We need transport from Sector Three, to the crater.
:'''Fiona Thyme''': ''[over the radio]'' Copy.
''[Nora gets up and approaches Oscar; he braces himself, but is surprised when she hugs him gently]''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': When we heard you went off after Ironwood on your own, we...
:'''Weiss Schnee''': How did you end up down in the slums?
:'''Oscar Pine''': It's, a.. ''[sighs]'' long story. I get the feeling, there's been a ''few'' of those, today. ''[they all glance at Penny]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': ...You're not going to tell them?
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[sharply]'' You and I aren't done ''talkiing'', yet. ''[aloud]'' Where's... Qrow? ''[everyone look away]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ...We don't know. The last we heard, he was with Robyn, but...
''[Joanna reenters]''
:'''Joanna Greenleaf''': Alright, your friend is back now. You ready to work? ''[sighs]'' The largest Grimm horde we've ever seen is hovering over the tundra, and out there is a city full of people with no ''heat'', and from what you've told us, no more military protection. And, while we're happy to give you guys a place to lie low for a while... It's time to get ''those'' people some help.
:'''Lie Ren''': ''How?'' Ironwood is stopping all evacuations to Atlas. And we can't get them out of the city with Salem's forces surrounding us.
:'''Joanna Greenleaf''': The ''crater'', beneath Atlas. It's not ''safe'', but it's warm... and with everyone in one place, we can do a better job protecting them. May can send you where you're needed most. We've got to get everyone down into that crater, before nightfall. In the slums, we ''might'' have a chance.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[deadpan]'' We're never going to sleep again. I just ''know'' it.
:'''Joanna Greenleaf''': ''[sharply]'' Either you're helping... or you're baggage. ''[leaves]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[stands up]''... We need to get out there and do what we can for Mantle.
''[As the characters speak, the scene alternates between their conversation and going about their missions]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': We need to do what we can, for ''everyone.'' What about Amity, and telling the world about Salem? We can't do this ''alone.'' We need ''help.''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Ruby's right. The Happy Huntresses are handling the evacuation better than we could. And there's a ''bigger'' picture.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': But, Amity isn't even ''finished.'' It was still under construction.
:'''Ruby Rose''':... Doctor, what would you need to launch Amity ''now?''
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Uh... we've made decent progress on construction and fuel collection. All potentially manageable, but, uh... Amity was designed so it couldn't launch itself, without first being granted clearance from General Ironwood's terminal.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Ruby, there is ''no way'' Ironwood will cooperate with us!
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... he doesn't ''have'' to. We just need the green light from his terminal, right?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You want to go ''back'' to the Academy?
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Er, actually, there is ''more'' than one terminal. The one in his office, and, uh, one in the main Atlesian military compound... at the base of the city. From there, you have to get into the compound somehow, and, uh, get inside the operations room. And  ''then... Hoo,'' boy. I might need to think about this some more.
:'''Oscar Pine''': And just to clarify: this is the ''easy'' option?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': What you're saying is, it can't be done! It's ''pointless''- and even if you got the message out, there's no guarrantee help would come!
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[whirls around, angrily]'' It's ''not'' pointless! Atlas is only Salem's ''current'' target. She's not hiding anymore, and once she's done here, she'll move on to the rest of Remnant! We ''need'' to warn them!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...Ruby, when we got here, we said we'd follow your lead. But... things haven't exactly worked out. ''[Ruby, Weiss, Nora and Oscar look taken aback]'' I just...
:'''Lie Ren''': ''[steps forward]'' There are people here who need us ''right now.'' That's something we can ''actually'' do.
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': But this ''isn't'' about ''just'' Atlas! Ruby's right. It's about ''all'' of Remnant. They need to know in Vacuo, in Mistral, in ''Vale'', what's ''coming''... so they can prepare!
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[steps between them]'' Okay, okay... then let's go for ''both.'' Get Amity up and running, ''and'' evacuate Mantle.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But that's how Salem got this ''far'', by dividing us! We have to stick together!
:'''Oscar Pine''': No. What Salem wants, is to turn us ''against'' each other... just like this. Jaune has a point. We can work separately, and still be united.
:'''Penny Polendina''': Or... let ''me'' take the Relic to Salem... and maybe she will call off her attack, on the Kingdom.
:'''Oscar Pine''': I don't think we can trust Salem to actually do that... and the moment she uses the Staff to create anything else, Atlas falls onto Mantle.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[to Penny]'' Nobody's turning you over to ''anybody.'' I think that's the ''one'' thing we could all agree on.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Okay. Then I guess ''we're'' going to Atlas. ''[Nora nods]'' Can you help us get to that terminal?
:'''Pietro Polendina''': I, uh... suppose someone needs to help you bypass security-
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[quietly] I'll'' go.
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Penny, we can't risk-
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[turns around, Maiden flames emitting from her eyes] I'll go.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[sighs]''... Do what you gotta do. I'm going out there to see what ''I'' can do. ''[she heads for the door, her teammates watching her]''
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Yang? ''[he tosses her some keys]'' Go by the pharmacy. I was developing some new tools for you, before all... ''this'' happened. You're gonna need them.
:'''Lie Ren''': Nora?
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': I'm going with Ruby.
:'''Lie Ren''': But, what about Mantle?
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Oh, ''I'm'' saving Mantle. Because I ''actually'' believe we can do this!

===Refuge [Volume 8, Episode 2]===
===Strings [Volume 8, Episode 3]===
===Fault [Volume 8, Episode 4]===
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[checking her Scroll]'' We need to get out of this weather, before the cold drops our Auras completely. How much further to the outpost? ''[Ren doesn't answer]'' Ren? how much-
:'''Lie Ren''': ''[curtly]'' I don't know.
''[Yang glances back at Jaune, who shrugs, then moves up next to Ren]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I thought you said you saw it, when you were up in the air.
:'''Lie Ren''': I ''did''... before I had to cut myself loose, to help you guys.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Yeah... you've brought that up a couple times, now. Something you need to say?
:'''Lie Ren''': Not really. Wouldn't want to waste any more time. ''[He moves ahead, but Yang follows him]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Hey! What is your deal?
:'''Lie Ren''': Don't worry about it.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Well, I'm sorry things aren't going ''smoothly'' enough for you!
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''Guys.''
:'''Lie Ren''': They're not going &quot;smoothly&quot; at all!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I hate to break it to you, but that's part of being a Huntsman!
:'''Lie Ren''': Are you kidding?! We don't know the first ''thing'' about being Huntsmen! We clearly weren't ''ready!''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Guys, stop it!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Were we &quot;not ready&quot; when we saved Haven? When we took down a ''Leviathan?'' We got the Lamp to Atlas-
:'''Lie Ren''': And then we ''lost'' it! And after that, when we had to make ''real'' decisions, we got every single one wrong. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I'm not going to pretend like we did everything perfectly. But if we'd done ''nothing'', things would be even worse than they are now!
:'''Lie Ren''': How could they possibly be worse? We are stuck out here while Salem has the Lamp, ''and'' Oscar! We've got no plan, no army-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': We've got the Maiden!
:'''Lie Ren''': And by keeping her from opening the Vault for Ironwood, we're just trapping the WHOLE city, for Salem! ''[walks away, stares up at Atlas] People are going to die...'' because of ''us.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': So, what? We should just give ''Ironwood'' what he wants? Abandon Mantle?! You think Atlas is still gonna be able to ''float to safety'', now that she's here?!
:'''Lie Ren''': I don't know! But these aren't the kind of decisions we should be making, because we have no idea what we're doing!
:'''Jaune Arc''': Okay, ''both'' of you: cut it out!
:'''Lie Ren''': I'm just saying, what nobody else wants to: we're in ''way'' over our heads. Ruby is barely more than a kid, I'm just an orphan from the middle of nowhere-
:'''Jaune Arc''': Ren, I-
:'''Lie Ren''': ''You'', cheated your way into ''Beacon!''
''[All three of them freeze. After a tense pause, Ren looks away]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[curtly]''... You don't think we should be Huntsmen? ''Fine''. But I'm getting out of the cold. ''[quietly, as he passes Ren]'' We've still got a job to do.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[to Ren]'' Seriously, is your goal just to push ''everyone'' away?
----
''[Oscar wakes up in an cell on Monstra]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Oscar? Don't panic. We're going to be okay.
:'''Oscar Pine''': What?...
''[He notices he is hanging from the Hound's jaws. Salem watches him from the doorway, smoky images of her daughters dancing over her hand]''
:'''Salem''': My long-lost Ozma... found, at last. ''[she snuffs out her illusion and approaches, as Oscar struggles]'' So ''small'', this new host of yours. It's a wonder my Hound didn't break you. It's been... how many ''years'', since we saw each other like this, face to face? And nothing to say?
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[imitating Ozpin's intonations]'' I'm... sorry the reunion, isn't living up to your ''expectations.''
''[Salem stares at him, then suddenly grabs his face, dragging him close]''
:'''Salem''': ''[menacingly]'' You can ''pretend'', boy... but you're not fully him. Not ''yet'', at least. ''[she releases him]'' Well... perhaps you and I can have a better ''working'' relationship. Oscar, was it? ''[she walks around him and the Hound, scratching its' shoulder]'' The Beacon Relic. My forces have been unable to locate the Relic beneath the school. If I know my Ozma... he has used some means of deception, to hide its' location differently than the others. I need to know where it is.
:'''Oscar Pine''': I... that's not something I know about.
:'''Salem''': Of course. ''[walks away]'' He ''would'' keep that one guarded, as long as possible. How about something easier, then? The password for the Lamp.
:'''Oscar Pine''': ...The Lamp is, all out of questions.
''[Salem turns and fires a magic bolt into Oscar's chest, causing him to scream in agony]''
:'''Salem''': The lies come out of you ''so easily... [she approaches and carresses his cheek, causing Oscar to flinch]'' Like-minded souls, ''indeed.'' One of you, is going to tell me what you know. I don't much care if it is you, ''or'' Ozma. Either way... I'll ''finally'' have the Relic.
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[groaning, defiantly]''... I won't tell you ''anything.''
''[Salem shrugs, then opens the door. Hazel enters, his expression grim.]''
:'''Oscar Pine''': Hazel? Wait, wait- ''[Hazel punches him in the gut, knocking him from the Hound's grip]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''That'', was for Haven Academy. ''[He kicks Oscar in the ribs, then cracks his neck]'' Everything that follows... will be for my ''sister.''

===Amity [Volume 8, Episode 5]===
===Midnight [Volume 8, Episode 6]===
===War [Volume 8, Episode 7]===
===Dark [Volume 8, Episode 8]===
''[Ruby and Blake attempt to start the auxiliary power generator on Schnee Manor]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Ah, C'mon, c'mon!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Don't worry. It'll work.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Nothing else has.
:'''Blake Belladonna''':... I know... you don't always know ''what'' to do. But that's never stopped you from doing ''something''. I was like that as a girl, but time and... a lot of ''other'' things, took their toll on me. Then, I wasn't sure if that kind of girl could actually survive in the world... Until I met ''you.'' It was a little strange at first, because you were younger, but... I've always looked up to you, Ruby. And I still do.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tearing up]'' ...Thanks, Blake.
''[The generator activates. Blake smiles at Ruby, but then her smile fades and her cat ears droop]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': What?
''[The Hound's silhouette looms menacingly outside the window behind her]''
-----
''[Penny cries out as Watts' computer virus tries to hack her, alerting the Hound]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': It's coming!
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[struggling]'' I'm sorry!
''[After a few moments, her eyes turn red as the virus takes control; she marches toward the door of Weiss's room. Klein tries to stop her, but Penny shoves him away, then marches out the entrance hall, passing Whitley and Willow]''
:'''Whitley Schnee''': What are you doing?!
:'''Penny Polendina''': I must open the Vault... and then, self-terminate.
''[The Hound suddenly lunges at her. Penny blocks its' attack, but it sprouts another arm, grabs her head and bashes her against the floor, shutting her down]''
:'''Hound''': ''Take. The Girl. [picks her up as Ruby, Weiss and Blake appear at the bottom of the stairs]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Penny!
''[The Hound holds its' claws to Penny's throat threateningly.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[angrily]'' That's... ''enough.''
''[Ruby activates her Silver Eyes, blasting the Hound back through the window. Penny topples down the stairs, unconscious. As Ruby and her friends gather around, they are interrupted as the Hound starts to crawl back through the window. It's head has been blasted away to reveal the face of a scarred, mutilated Faunus... with Silver Eyes.]''
:'''Faunus/Hound''': ''[unsteadily, as it staggers forward]'' Take... the girl. Take... the girl! Take! The! Girl!
''[Stunned and horrified, Ruby and her teammates drag Penny backward as the Hound advances down the steps, joints cracking and popping. The Grimm liquid covering its' body begins to cover its' face, regenerating its' Hound head]''
:'''Faunus/Hound''': Take! The! Girl! Take! The! ''Girl!''
''[On the stairs above, Witley gestures to Willow, indicating a giant ornamental suit of armor and sword; they both push against it as the Hound finishes regenerating.]''
:'''Hound''': ''TAKE! THE! GIRL!''
''[As it lunges forward, the armor and sword crashes down, killing it. Ruby falls to her knees, shocked.]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': What ''was'' that?
:'''Ruby Rose''': That was... a ''person.''
''[The Hound's forearm crumbles to dust, but the skeleton of its' host remains]''
:'''

===Witch [Volume 8, Episode 9]===
''[After a brief battle, Salem immobilizes Yang, Jaune, Oscar, Ren and Emerald with shadow tendrils; she approaches Emerald, a crackling sphere of magic in her hand.]''
:'''Salem''': What did you do with the Lamp?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[confused]'' N-nothing.
:'''Salem''': ''[holds the sphere near Emerald's face]''  It's ... ''missing''. Where is it?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''I'' didn't do anything with it!
:'''Salem''': Where... ''is'' it?!
''[She approaches Oscar, her tendrils lifting him to face her]''
:'''Salem''': ''[sighs]'' Look, how you've diminished. How you've lessened yourself, and for ''what?'' These children, this ruined world? ''[Enraged, she suddenly grabs his face, her nails near his eyes]'' ''Why... do... you.. keep...coming...back?!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Why do ''you?!'' ''[Salem releases Oscar and approaches her]'' All of this endless death, just because something ''bad'' happened to you once upon a time?! Nobody gets a fairy-tale ending! Everything... I've lost, every ''person''... I've lost, is because of ''YOU!''
:'''Salem''': ''[scornfully]'' And who is it I've &quot;taken&quot; from ''you'', girl?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Summer Rose... my ''Mom!''
:'''Salem''': Hmm... ''[bends forward with an amused smile]...Her'', again.
:'''Hazel Rainart''': Your Grace.
:'''Salem''': Ah, Hazel. I found our guests.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No-! ''[Salem covers her mouth with a shadow tendril]''
:'''Salem''': ''[gestures to Emerald] This'' one, was helping them. ''[her tendrils drop Oscar to the floor]'' Take the boy back to his chamber. I have ''work'' to do, on this one.
:'''Hazel Rainart''': Yes, of course. 
''[He glances at each of the prisoners, Emerald's pleading eyes following him, then grabs Oscar by the collar and lifts him until they are eye-to-eye]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''[leans close to Oscar's ear, mutters] No more Gretchens, boy.''
''[He drops Oscar, having slipped Long Memory into his hand. Salem brings her magic sphere close to Emerald's face again]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[tearfully]'' I ''really'' don't know!
''[as Salem prepares to torture Emerald, Hazel punches her in the jaw, hurling her backward. She cushions her landing with a whirlwind and rises again, her eyes glowing angrily, but her shadow tendrils release the prisoners. Hazel tosses aside his vest, revealing his stash of Dust crystals]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''GO, NOW!! [He stabs five crystals into his shoulders, overdosing his body with the Dust's power and activating his Semblance]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Hazel...''[She shakes her head softly]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''[smiles reassuringly]''...Go.
:'''Salem''': So, you've decided ''against'' vengeance for your sister, after ''all'' this time?
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''[conjures fireballs over his fists, settling into a combat stance]'' I'm doing what ''Gretchen'' would have done!

===Ultimatum [Volume 8, Episode 10]===
''[Cinder and Watts watch Monstra crumble in the distance]''
:'''Arthur Watts''': Did... Did anyone respond?
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[glances at her Scroll]'' No.
:'''Arthur Watts''': Well, ''she'll'' come back. In the interim, we need a plan.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Plan? The plan hasn't changed. I'm going to rip the Maiden power out of Penny Polendina, because ''you're'' going to bring her to me.
:'''Arthur Watts''': I beg your pardon?
:'''Cinder Fall''': You said in your message that you had control over Penny.
:'''Arthur Watt''': I said that I had Penny ''under control'', not that I could telekinetically force her to do whatever I want.
:'''Cinder Fall''':...''What?'' 
:'''Arthur Watts''': I implanted a ''virus'' into her, you dimwit. She's on a set path now... at least, she ''should'' be. ''[turns away]'' As much as I hate to admit it, there seems to be some part of her capable of... ''resisting.'' Regardless, it's only a matter of time before her mechanical body succombs to the virus. She'll open the Vault, then she'll destroy herself, and our little Penny problem will be-
''[Cinder suddenly siezes him by his lapel, dragging him close]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': What do you mean, she'll destroy herself?! How am I supposed to take her powers if she's dead?!
:'''Arthur Watts''': You know, it's impressive that you haven't realized this yet, but I don't ''work'' for you! ''[Cinder growls and extends her Grimm arm, dangling Watts off the building's edge] Please''. You can't just threaten me, like everyone else!
:'''Cinder Fall''': You think you're ''so'' clever, don't you, Arthur?
:'''Arthur Watts''': Salem sent you to bring me back-
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''Salem'', isn't here right now... but I think we can still come up with a plan, while she's ''pulling herself together.'' First, I'm gonna watch you plummet to an unremarkable end. And then, I'm gonna burn a path directly to the Vault. Where I will wait, to tear that magical puppet to ''pieces''... and take, what is ''mine.''
''[She conjures flames in her fist, smiling confidently, but her smile fades as Watts starts to laugh]''
:'''Arthur Watts''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, of ''course'' you are! Because that's just what you ''do'', isn't it? And how has that worked out for you? ''[Cinder's Maiden powers begin to activate, as his words trigger flashbacks of her previous defeats]'' You ''stormed'' into Fria's room, thinking you could take on Ironwood's top fighter and war machine. But you ''couldn't.'' And that ''machine'' became the Winter Maiden. Oh, and let's not forget your deal with Raven Branwen! Get all your enemies in one place so you'd have a ''shot'' at revenge. If ''only'' someone could have warned you against such a miserable idea! Oh, wait: ''I DID!'' But ''you'' pushed ahead, and you lost it when all you had to do was your ''job!''
''[Cinder becomes increasingly angry as she flashes back to her childhood abuse]''
:'''Arthur Watts''': You think you're entitled to everything just because you've suffered, but suffering ''isn't'' enough! You can't just be strong, you have to be ''smart!'' You can't just be deserving, you have to be ''worthy!'' But all you have ''ever'' been, is a ''BLOODY MIGRAINE!''
''[Cinder screams in rage, but instead of letting Watts fall, she drops him at her feet; she walks away and sits quietly on the ledge, shedding a silent tear. Behind her, Watts exhales heavily]''

===Risk [Volume 8, Episode 11]===
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[glaincing at the broken armor]'' You know, that giant Hound kicked us around like we were ''nothing''. But Blake said you and the Schnees managed to take it down. Still having to one-up your big sis, huh?
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[quietly]'' ... Did she tell you what it was, underneath?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''':... Yeah. 
:'''Ruby Rose''': You know what that ''means'', then.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...I wouldn't worry about that-
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''That's what happened to Mom. [Yang's facade of confidence falls, and she sits down and starts to cry]''  When I saw its' eyes... I knew. Salem used to ''kill'' people with Silver Eyes... like Maria. But she's alway wanted ''me'' alive. Why would that change, unless... when she met Mom... she learned she could do something ''new.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[stands up, approaches Ruby]'' Ruby...
:'''Ruby Rose''': We shouldn't lie to ourselves! I wasted our time, getting Amity up, thinking help would come, but it didn't. And Amity ''fell''. I was being childish.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...You were being ''optimistic. [Sits with Ruby]'' Look, blind optimism isn't great... but ''no'' optimism, means we've already lost. We ''need'' hope. We need, to take risks-
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[ pulls away angrily]'' But mine ''didn't'' work!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[sighs]'' It still got a warning out! Ruby, they're not called sure things! They're called risks, and in case you didn't notice, ''my'' plan for Mantle didn't work either! But we got Oscar back, and did a ''lot'' more that was never in the plan. Mom... took a risk, the day she left. And I don't think... I don't think it went the way she wanted it to. ''[hugs Ruby, who is tearing up]'' But she's ''still'' my hero.
-----
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[overcome by the virus]'' I can no longer be delayed.''[Ruby, her friends and Emerald rush outside as Penny prepares to take off]''
:'''Ruby Rose''':  ''[rushes to her and grabs her arm]'' Penny, ''please!''
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[flickering between herself and the virus]'' I- I ''must'' open the Vault! ''Rrgh!'' I' I do not want- ''Agh!'' Ruby! Stop me!
:'''Ruby Rose''': Penny! ''[grabs Penny's waist]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[her eyes go fully red with the virus]'' I ''must'' open the Vault. And self-terminate.
''[She takes off, Ruby clinging to her, but Blake catches her arm with Gambol Shroud; Ren catches her other arm with StormFlower. Both of them strain to hold her back, Nora, Yang, Jaune and Oscar supporting them. Once Penny returns to the ground, Wiess anchors her with a Gravity Glyph]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': I've got her!
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': What do we do?!
''[Penny activates her Maiden powers, breaking Weiss' grip with a cyclone and lifting off, still carrying Ruby.]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': I ''must''... open the Vault... and ''self-terminate!''
''[Emerald catches her by the shoulders with Thieve's Respite, anchoring her again]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''Do'' something!
''[Jaune uses his Semblance to amplify Weiss's Aura, allowing her to connjure a stronger Glyph and force Penny back to the ground.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[hugging Penny's shoulders]'' Penny, ''please.'' Tell me how to help you!
:'''Penny Polendina''':  ''[her eyes turn green again]...Kill me. [Ruby looks shocked]'' Kill me... and I can make ''sure'' the power goes to you. Please... ''please! [the virus  starts to take her over again]'' I cannot fight it!
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Yes, you can! It's just a ''part'' of you, remember? If you were ''only'' a machine, you ''never'' could've fought back for this long!
:'''Ruby Rose''':... She's right... She's right! ''Jaune!'' Boost her Aura!
''[Jaune amplifys Penny's Aura with his Semblance, forcing the virus back. Ruby slowly releases Penny, who smiles and nods gratefully to Jaune, before Ruby hugs her. The group gathers around, with Nora hugging her too.]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Did... I stop the virus?
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[frowns]''... No. It's still there. But...
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[holds her hand]'' You've got an ''Aura'', Penny. A ''soul. That's'' who you are. Our ''friend''... not a machine.
''[Penny beams, squeezing her and Nora's hands]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': I think you're ''wrong'', by the way. ''[the group turn to face her]'' I highly doubt you're in the same place, ''you'' started. I mean, yeah...you, you guys've been getting your asses kicked. Some of that, my fault. But, like, you're at ''war.'' You're gonna take hits. ''[sighs]'' Look, I'm just gonna be ''super'' pissed if you all ''finally'' decide to give up the moment I switch sides!
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[smiles]'' &quot;Switch sides&quot;, huh?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Awww... ''[the group laugh]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[pouts]'' Or, like... whatever! ''[Oscar offers her a hand up]''
:'''Oscar Pine''': If, you all don't mind... I really think ''Ozpin'' would like to say something. ''[the group glance at Ruby]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ...Go ahead.
''[Oscar relinquishes control of his body to Ozpin]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': I was recently... reminded, of an old fairy tale. A young girl, flees the consequences of a choice, to a magical place. But, having never learned from her initial failure... she only succeeds in spreading it. I failed, ''all'' of you. I should have trusted you, with the truth... and should never have ''run'', the day you discovered it.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[glances at Blake]'' It was... rough. But...
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I think after everything that's happened here... we understand. Trust is...
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Trust is, a ''risk. [glances at her family]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': And I hope... it's a risk you can take on me, again.

===Creation [Volume 8, Episode 12]===
===Worthy [Volume 8, Episode 13]===
===The Final Word [Volume 8, Episode 14]===
''[Cinder corners a weakened Weiss]''
:'''Cinder Fall''':  It figures that a ''Schnee'' would be the last one standing. Letting all your friends die, first...
''[She spews flames at Weiss, but Penny flies in and deflects them with her crystal blades]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': You wouldn't know ''anything'', about friends.
''[Jaune leaps into the fight, blasting Cinder back with his shield, and drawing his sword. As Cinder rises to face the trio, she gasps in pain as her Grimm arm suddenly convulses]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[smugly] She's back...''
''[As Penny flies forward, Cinder forces her back with obsidian projectiles, then uses walls of flame to separate her, Weiss and Jaune. As Penny looks for them in concern, she gives a cry of pain as Cinder's Grimm arm impales her torso. She crumples to the ground, but Weiss drives Cinder away before she can siphon Penny's Maiden powers. Jaune kneels next to her.]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Penny! Just... hold on! ''[He tries to boost her Aura]'' My Semblance-
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''No''... There's not enough time to heal me. She can't get the Staff ''and'' the power. But there ''is'' something, you can do. ''[she reaches for his sword]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[pulls back, shocked]'' I- I don't know where the others are, but- Weiss will give us time! 
''[Behind them, Weiss desperately tries to hold off Cinder's relentless attacks, using both her sword and Blake's, but she is clearly outmatched. Penny reaches for Jaune's sword again.]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': Let me choose... this ''one'' thing. ''[smiles weakly]'' Trust me!
''[As Jaune stares at his sword, Cinder knocks Gambol Shroud from Weiss's hand, sending it into the void. In the Winter Maiden's Vault, Ironwood lands a heavy blow on Winter, throwing her backward and breaking her Aura. Cinder knocks down Weiss, advancing for the killing blow, but freezes when she hears Jaune's anguished cry behind her. Both his tears and Penny's blood from his sword, drip onto the platform.]''

''[In a limbo-like space, Penny waits patiently. She suddenly smiles and waves]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': Sal-u- tations! You made it!
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[approaching her]'' Where... what is this?
:'''Penny Polendina''': I thought of you... and, here we are.
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[understanding instantly]'' Oh, ''Penny''... 
:'''Penny Polendina''': It seemed fitting, that it should be you. It was ''your'' power, after all.
:'''Winter Schnee''': No, Penny. ''You'' were always the real Maiden, at heart. ''I'' was just the machine... just, following orders. 
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[takes Winter's hands in hers]'' You were my ''friend.''
''[The glow of the Maiden Powers passes from her hands, to Winter's]''
:'''Winter Schnee''': ...''Thank you'', for trusting me with this. When you're gone-
:'''Penny Polendina''': I won't be ''gone''. I'll be part of you.
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[smiling tearfully]'' Good. I'm glad.
''[Penny smiles one last time and dissolves into light as Winter wakes, to find Ironwood staring down at her]''
:'''James Ironwood''': So... the destiny I chose for you, has finally arrived.
''[Winter rises to her feet, her head lowered.]''
:'''Winter Schnee''': You chose ''nothing. [An icy whirlwind lifts her and her swords, off the ground]'' This... was a ''gift.''
''[She opens her eyes, blue flames flaring from them. Ironwood fires his Dust cannon, but Winter effortlessly deflects the shot back, knocking him down, then flies into the Vault's portal]''
----
''[In the Winter Maiden's Vault, an injured Ironwood awakens. As Cinder exits the portal carrying the Staff and the Lamp, her smug expression turns frightened as a trail of smoke swirls down the lift toward her.]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': I... I failed you again, Master. They used the Staff to save ''thousands.'' Before our allies fell, Neopolitan... ''killed'', Ruby. And before Ruby and her teammates fell... They ''used'' the Lamp's final question.
''[The smoke circles Cinder, then swirls together, materializing into Salem. Her eyes narrow suspiciously]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': I- I couldn't stop them! I couldn't even stop the Maiden from escaping, without putting the Relics in jeopardy! I'm... I'm sorry. 
''[she kneels, holding out the Staff and Lamp. Salem approaches and accepts the Relics, examining them]''
:'''Salem''': In pursuit of a new world... no cost, is too great. You've done well, Cinder. Our work here is done.
''[She starts to leave the Vault; Cinder rises and follows her, looking smug again. Ironwood crawls toward his dropped gun]''
:'''Salem''': You said they ''used'' the Staff? I assume you rid the world of their Creation. What did you create... in its' stead?
''[In Atlas' military compound, flames engulf the complex. Inside Atlas Central Command, Watts tries in vain to break out, screaming in desperation]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': I merely added more ''flames'', to the fires of Atlas.
''[Salem smiles. There is a sudden click of a hammer, and Cinder glances back to see Ironwood aiming his pistol at her. She smiles]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': And that's... ''checkmate''.
''[As she and Salem leave the Vault, Ironwood sadly lowers the gun, accepting his fate. As Salem and Cinder fly away from the burning city, Atlas crashes into Mantle's crater. The impact dislodges glacial ice, causing nearby frozen lakes to rapidly flood and submerge the city. From the airship, Qrow, Robyn and the Ace-Ops watch in shock, Qrow desperately calling for Ruby and Yang in his earpiece.]''

== Volume 9 ==
===Rude, Red and Royal [Volume 9, Episode 3]===

===A Cat Most Curious [Volume 9, Episode 4]===
:'''Herbalist''': Please... take a seat.
:'''Blake''': Actually, I think... Maybe we should be going! ''[nervously smiles]'' Right, Ruby?
:'''Herbalist''': This won’t take long.
:'''Ruby''': Umm... ''[turns around]''
:''[Suddenly, the door behind them closes, and Team RWBY gasps in shock.]''
:'''Herbalist''': Just... answer the questions. ''[Ruby turns around. He inhales another puff of smoke from the hookah; echo]'' ''What... are... you?''
:''[The Herbalist drops the leaves in their hands into the fire pit in front of them, causing a large amount of black smoke to surround Team RWBY. Ruby starts to cough violently, falling to her knees. Her shrunken teammates fall out of her hands.]''
:'''Ruby''': No! ''[coughs again]''
:'''Herbalist''': ''[echo]'' Are you sure you know? You have to be sure what you are, and of what you’re going to be...
:''[Weiss, Blake, and Yang get up, but the smoke is too thick for them to see, and they are separated.]''
:'''Yang''': Blake! Ruby! ''[coughs; Black smoke comes out from her mouth and it takes the form of her own past self; confused]'' What?
:'''Past Yang''': You don’t have to go forward, y’know? You can go back, back to before.
:'''Yang''': ''[stares down at her prosthetic arm and holds it]'' What? What are you talking about?
:''[Meanwhile, in another space with Blake and her past self...]''
:'''Past Blake''': It’s simple, really. You could just be human, or just a cat, if you wanted. Really, it’s up to you.
:'''Blake''': Why would I do that?
:'''Past Blake''': Like I said, it’s simple, much simpler than trying to be a bridge between Humans and Faunus. Why struggle with that responsibility?
:''[The current Blake frowns. Meanwhile, in another space with Weiss and her past self..]''
:'''Past Weiss''': The Schnee name. Why bother, anymore? What even stands for now? Instead, you could be a nobody. Could you imagine? Not even a single bit of baggage on your shoulders. Isn’t that what you want? To be free?
:'''Past Blake''': To be something simpler?
:'''Past Yang''': To be whole again?
:'''Yang''': ''[gives a serious, yet determined look on her face]'' No. My losses, my failures. Those more than anything are what have shaped me into who I am, showed me how I need to grow. If there’s something I’m missing, it’s not because I lost it. It’s because I haven’t found it yet. And the only way to do that is to keep going.
:'''Blake''': A simple life wouldn’t be my life! ''[draws Gambol Shroud’s katana]'' My family, my friends, my culture. I belong to them, just as much as they belong to me. To give that all away wouldn’t be simplicity, it would be betrayal.
:'''Weiss''': I don’t know who you think you are, but let me tell you who I am: I am the granddaughter of a hero and a child of a villain. ''[points Myrtenaster at her past self]'' I am a citizen of a fallen Kingdom and an heir to nothing. I will not be defined by my name because I will be the one to define it. I am Weiss Schnee, and I am a Huntress!
:'''Blake''': I am a Huntress!
:'''Yang''': I am a Huntress!
:''[Elsewhere, Ruby is seen despondent and is on her knees while her past self stands over her.]''
:'''Past Ruby''': So, are you a Huntress? Like the ones you read about in books?
:'''Ruby''': ''[quietly]'' I... I don’t know...
:'''Past Ruby''': They always saved the day, didn’t they? Always knew what to do. Always won in the end.
:'''Ruby''': ''[lowering her head]'' But... life isn’t like a fairy tale...
:'''Past Ruby''': That’s right! It’s up to you to make things better, isn’t it? Everything all depends on you! Your sister needs you, your friends need you, the whole world needs you to keep fighting, forever and ever, against an invincible monster that took your mother! ''[Ruby’s eyes widen upon hearing this]'' Mom was the best, ''[frowning]'' but even she failed. That doesn’t seem fair. None of this seems fair.
:'''Ruby''': But... What am I supposed to do...?
:'''Past Ruby''': You can do whatever you want. Be whoever you want! You don’t even have to be Ruby Rose... ''[Ruby looks down, seemingly on the verge of despair]'' So, what are you gonna be?

===Confessions Within Cumulonimbus Clouds [Volume 9, Episode 6]===
''[Blake and Yang are caught on opposite, incomplete rope bridges leading to a central column, amidst a massive windstorm]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You all right?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I'll feel a lot ''better'', when we're together on that platform! 
''[A missing section of the bridge materializes in front of Blake; surprised, she advances]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Uhhh... is it a password, or something? &quot;Together!&quot; &quot;Platform!&quot; ''[nothing happens]''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': No luck?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[shakes her head and smiles]'' I'm sure ''you'll'' figure it out, though. You're good at that.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You think so?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Well, yeah! You've got a really good... brain. ''[as she chuckles weakly, a section materializes on her bridge]'' Okay, that did something! ''[advances]'' Uhh... I talked about you, so... ''[clears her throat]'' You have cat ears! ''[Blake smiles and twitches her ears, but nothing happens]''... I think your cat ears are ''cute. [Another section appears, she advances] Nailed'' it! Even though I don't know what 'it' is, yet.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Maybe it's... saying things we've never said. To each other. ''[Yang shrugs sheepishly and gestures for her to try]'' I... think you're an ''extraordinary'' person. ''[Yang looks shocked]'' You're... always the first, to lighten a situation. You act bravely, when you're afraid. You ''do'', what you say. ''[As the winds begin to fade, a large section of Blake's bridge appears, and she advances with a smile]'' Try to keep up!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''':... I like that you've never been ''intimidated'' by me. Even when you didn't like me all that much.  
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[looks away]'' I was... a little wary of people in general. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': But you never gave up on them. Even when they hurt you. You ''never'' give up. You know what ''matters'' to you. ''[a large section of her bridge appears, and she advances]'' Let's make this quicker. Any... big truths we haven't dropped on each other yet? 
''[As the sky lightens, Blake looks away, blushing slightly, then meets Yang's gaze with a smile. Yang's eyes widen, and she looks away quickly; both their bridges suddenly extend, pulling both of them back from the pillar]'' 
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Did you just... think of something, then didn't say it?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[blushes]''... That ''can't'' be what this is about. ''[she looks fearfully at Blake, who is smiling at her; mentally]'' It's like... a cliff. And if I do it, I'm just going to... ''fall''.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[mentally]'' I think we're ''already'' falling. ''[aloud]'' Just... ''say'' it, Yang.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[takes a deep breath]''... I... think I love you-
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I love you, too.
''[Suddenly, both are standing on the pillar, directly in front of each other. After looking into each other's eyes for a moment, they both blush, smile, and kiss as flowers bloom around them.]''

===The Perils of Paper Houses [Volume 9, Episode 7]===
:'''Jaune''': ''[slamming his hands to the ground]'' I couldn’t save them... I was supposed to save them and... and they’re dead... ''[Juniper walks to his side and comforts him]''
:'''Yang''': No, Jaune. They’re gone, but they’re not dead. They’ll be back.
:'''Weiss''': Yeah, it’s what they wanted. ''[turns to Ruby]'' Right, Ruby?
:'''Ruby''': ''[has a scowling expression on her face; venomous]'' Why are you asking me?
:'''Blake''': ''[she, Weiss, and Yang look at her in shock]'' Um, we just--
:'''Ruby''': Because I’m the leader? ''[clenches fist]'' Because I’m just supposed to have something to say? ''[looks up angrily]'' Cuz I don’t... I mean, why do I have to be the leader anyway? Why do I have to always be the one to pick people up? What about me? “No time”, right? ''[walks to Weiss, who reels back]'' &quot;Gotta get home!&quot;, &quot;Gotta help Jaune!&quot;, Gotta find someone who isn’t just going to screw everything up! ''[turns to Blake and Yang]'' “Gotta stay positive!” Right?! ''[Blake hides behind Yang, who instinctively protects her as Ruby approaches them; sarcastically]'' Smiles all around! Maybe even finally get our feelings sorted out! Good for you, by the way. We’re all so happy for you!
:'''Yang''': ''[angered]'' Hey...
:'''Ruby''': I’m sorry, is this a bad time? '''''Are we supposed to be mourning Jaune’s make-believe friends?!'''''
:'''Jaune''': ''[seething]'' They’re gone... because of YOU! ''[stands up]'' The Walkers came for you, because Neo. Hates. '''YOU!''' ''[walks over to Ruby]'' '''Oh, and let’s not forget the reason we’re in the Ever After in the first place is because of your plan that didn’t work! What about you?! &lt;big&gt;IT’S ALL ABOUT YOU!&lt;/big&gt;''' ''[Ruby looks up at him angrily, gritting her teeth and on the verge of tears]''
:'''Weiss''': Jaune...
:'''Jaune''': ''[snaps out of his rage and realizes what he said]'' I’m sorry, I… I know I’m not okay. I- I’m not right, but... How am I supposed to be...? I’ve been alone… for '''SO... LONG!''' Here... On that bridge... I was the only one that could do it! I was the '''ONLY ONE!''' ''[Weiss, Blake, and Yang, look at him in pity]'' And I... ''[tears stream down his face]'' And now I have to live with that forever... In here or back home...
:'''Blake''': Guys, I know things are bad, but--
:'''Ruby''': ''[grimacing]'' Shut... Up... ''[the gang look at her wide-eyed]'' Don’t... do that... ''[tears begin to stream down her face]'' Just don’t...
:''[Little lowers their head in pity in Ruby’s hood. Ruby then turns around and picks up Crescent Rose, using her Semblance to fly away from her friends and sister into the forest. Weiss, Blake and Yang helplessly watch their leader go, while Jaune and Juniper over look the now submerged village of the Paper Pleasers.]''

===Tea Amidst Terrible Trouble [Volume 9, Episode 8]===
:''[Ruby walks through the forest. It begins to darken around her as she continues to walk. A glowing blue butterfly flutters past Ruby. As Ruby continues walking, a spotlight appears above her. Each spotlight shows Ruby walking slowly and much slower than the first two. She crosses the bridge between the Origami Acre and the Abandoned Acre. She arrives at a pink-colored extravagant manor that Neo created. Everything goes dark. Another spotlight appears above Ruby again, but this time, Ruby is somehow inside the mansion and in a room standing in front of a portrait of a family of three. The other portraits appear in few spotlights. The first two portraits depict Trivia Vanille--Neo's real name--both as a child and adolescent, with her parents Jimmy and Carmel Vanille. The other portrait depicts her with Cinder standing besides Salem’s throne. Ruby slowly walked towards the largest portrait, depicting Roman Torchwick and Neo with her parents lying on the ground, apparently dead.]''
:'''Ruby''': What is this?
:''[As Ruby stares at the portrait, Roman’s left eye moves to gaze at her direction.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': Hello, Red! ''[Ruby gasps and brandishes Crescent Rose’s scythe form, backing away from the portrait. He stands up from his seat]'' Been a while. ''[jumps off from the trunk and casually walks]'' How’s the hero biz treatin’ ya? I gotta say, you’re not looking too good. ''[gives a kick at Jimmy's corpse]''
:'''Ruby''': Where’s Neo?
:'''Neo-Roman''': Yeesh, no manners. And after everyone came out to see you! ''[echoes]''
:''[The lights begin to turn on in the room Ruby was in. Ruby turns around and becomes astonished to see certain people at the table: Penny Polendina, Pyrrha Nikos, Leonardo Lionheart, Clover Ebi, Ozpin and General James Ironwood. Each of them has a cup of tea in front of them.]''
:'''Neo-Penny''': ''[saluting]'' Salutations, Ruby!
:'''Neo-Pyrrha''': ''[waving]'' Hello again!
:''[Neo-Lionheart is seen fiddling with his lion tail before he looks at Ruby and sits up straight. Neo-Clover adjusts his clover badge.]''
:'''Neo-Ozpin''': ''[adjusting his glasses]'' Miss Rose.
:'''Neo-Ironwood''': ''[smiling and gesturing]'' Why don’t you take a seat?
:'''Ruby''': ''[looks on at the sight of the dead people she knew with horror]'' How is she doing this? ''[everyone at the table laughs at her bewilderment]'' Stop it! This isn’t real!
:'''Neo-Roman''': ''[suddenly appears next to Ruby]'' Is it real? ''[Ruby becomes startled by his presence beside her and falls to the floor]'' You’re the one following a talking cat around a fairy tale. ''[walks away from Ruby, twirling Melodic Cudgel. He jumps onto the table. Everyone stops laughing and stares at Ruby]'' Reality’s gettin’ fuzzier by the minute, kid. ''[Ruby twirls Crescent Rose scythe and changes to sniper gun at Neo-him and the Neo-others. He twirls his cane and plants it back on the floor; Walks towards the otherside of the table then stops just as he was about to step on the tea cup. He hops over then turns around to face Ruby]'' Y’know once Neo realized where she was, everything changed. Always loved the idea of a place to run away from it all. Do whatever you want. ''[sits down cross-legged on the table between Neo-Lionheart and Neo-Clover]'' I offered that to her back on Remnant. ''[gives a frown]'' But we all remember how that ended.
:'''Ruby''': Is that seriously what this is all about!? You still blame me for what happened to Torchwick!? ''[Neo-Roman growls]'' If you’re looking for an apology, you’ve wasted your time!
:''[On atop of the tea party room, Little arrives and watches, having not heeded Ruby's words from earlier.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': They say everyone thinks they’re the hero of their own story. ''[everyone at the table gives a wry grin; their eyes change to Neo’s eye colors]'' But... ''[stands up]'' I knew what I was. And deep down, I think you know you are too. ''[steps onto the teacup containing multi-colored liquid, breaking it with his shoe, as he walks towards Ruby. He takes out a multi-colored leaf in his hand]''
:'''Ruby''': The leaves from the Tree?
:'''Neo-Roman''': Oh, you’re familiar? How about a little reset?
:'''Ruby''': Is that what you want? Well, if you want me dead, then come get me!
:'''Neo-Roman''': ''[chuckles]'' You don’t deserve to die, Red. You deserve to be broken down... ''[casually releases the leaf]'' Torn apart... ''wiped from existence''.
:''[The multi-colored leaf falls into the teacup. Ruby hears the sound behind her and turns around, aiming Crescent Rose at Neo. Neo jumps over Ruby as she blocks the potshots with Hush. As Neo flies over Ruby, Neo-Roman shoots at Ruby with Melodic Cudgel. Ruby is sent backwards away from the table. Neo-Roman catches Neo with a chuckle as everyone at the table applauds. Neo smiles at Neo-Roman before they both look down on Ruby. Neo-Roman places Neo to the ground.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': I’m gonna enjoy...
:'''Neo-Everyone''': ''[stand up from their seats]'' '''...Watching you break.''' ''[they have their eyes closed with eerie smiles. Neo-Roman kneels behind Neo, who gives a closed-eye smile]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Back at the tea party room, Ruby uses her Semblance to dodge the attacks from Neo-Penny, Neo-Pyrrha, Neo-Lionheart and Neo-Ironwood with their weapons while Roman, Neo, Neo-Ozpin and Neo-Clover are watching.]''
:'''Neo-Ironwood''': Who were you to think you knew what was best for Atlas?
:'''Neo-Pyrrha''': I was the best and brightest Beacon had to offer. ''[Ruby gets shot down and clings onto the chandelier]'' But I traded my life so my friends could live!
:''[Neo-Pyrrha throws Miló javelin at the chain of the chandelier. Ruby falls to the floor, the impact breaking her Aura. She gets up to try and reach for Crescent Rose, but is stopped by Neo-Penny’s Maiden powered Floating Array. Ruby looks back at her.]''
:'''Neo-Penny''': Just like you were too late to save me at the Vytal Festival... I died in Atlas too, didn’t I? ''[walks towards Ruby]'' Can you imagine what that's like? To be completely and utterly failed... time and again... ''[kneels down to Ruby]'' by someone who meant the world to you...
:''[Ruby reaches her hand towards Neo-Penny with her eyes on the verge of tears, but Neo-Roman uses the curved end of Melodic Cudgel to choke her from behind.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': You ready for that drink yet? ''[Ruby manages to break free from his choking grip and runs but gets attacked by Neo-Pyrrha]''
:'''Neo-Pyrrha''': How many more people are going to die because of '''you?!''' ''[swings her body around Miló javelin and delivers a kick at Ruby, sending her to the wall. She struggles to walk along it]''
:'''Ruby''': I’m trying to save everyone! ''[gets punched in the gut by Neo-Ironwood, who then pins her to the wall]''
:'''Neo-Ironwood''': And yet with all your best intentions... ''[Little gasps in shock, watching Ruby getting overwhelmed]'' Have you ever stopped to wonder if you’d done more harm than good!? ''[throws Ruby to the floor]''
:'''Ruby''': It’s not my fault...! ''[attempts to reach Crescent Rose, only to get beaten up by Neo-Ozpin with The Long Memory]''
:'''Neo-Ozpin''': '''How many more lives do you have to ruin before you realize you’re not cut out to save anyone!?'''
:'''Ruby''': ''[grabs Crescent Rose and slashes at Neo-Ozpin]'' '''NO!!!'''
:''[The Long Memory falls to the floor. Ruby becomes horrified to see that she slashes Neo-Oscar in Neo-Ozpin’s place.]''
:'''Neo-Oscar''': ''[stares at his hand tainted with his own blood]'' Ruby...
:''[Neo-Oscar falls backwards and dies. Ruby drops Crescent Rose and collapses on her knees. Neo-Penny and Neo-Clover approach Neo-Oscar’s corpse. Neo-Penny, covering her mouth in shock, then changes to Neo-Yang. Neo-Clover changes to Neo-Qrow, now horrified over Neo-Oscar’s &quot;death&quot;. Neo-Lionheart changes to Neo-Blake looking at Ruby in disbelief. Neo-Ironwood changes to Neo-Weiss looking down at Ruby.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': Do you really think you can stand to watch more of your friends fall?
:'''Ruby''': Please... stop...
:'''Neo-Roman''': Or are you ready to admit the truth? That the world would just be better off without you?
:''[Neo-Jaune appears in Neo-Pyrrha’s place with Neo-Nora and Neo-Ren, mourning over Neo-Oscar. Ruby begins to hyperventilate in fear and panic as Neo-Jaune, Neo-Ren and Neo-Nora join the others. Ruby breaks down in broken sobs, placing her head and hands to the floor. Neo carries the teacup and approaches Ruby. She places down the teacup and moves it with her boot towards Ruby. Ruby lifts her head slowly, staring at the teacup filled with a multi-colored liquid. Neo kneels down before Ruby. Ruby stares at the teacup before she looks at Neo, who stands up and looks down on her with a smirk. Neo turns and gets attacked by a beam. She is sent flying backwards to outside of the manor. Her Semblance suddenly dispels over the manor. Ruby, in her perspective of view, slowly opens her eyes. A hole of the manor is shown with the Great Tree in the background. She then blinks and opens to multi-colored leaf brewing in the teacup. She later blinks to see the Cat.]''
:'''Curious Cat''': It’s all right, Ruby. It’s over now.
:'''Ruby''': What? I’m sorry… ''[moves her body over]'' I don’t want to be me anymore... ''[softly sobs, the Cat rubs his paw on her shoulder]''
:'''Curious Cat''': It’s okay, little Huntress... ''[jumps onto Ruby’s torso]'' '''I can be you instead...''' ''[Ruby opens her eyes in realization; he chuckles]'' I have been trying to wear you down for so long! ''[phases his paws through Ruby’s chest, causing her to scream in pain and agony]''
:'''Ruby''': What are you... doing?! ''[gasps]''
:'''Curious Cat''': My purpose. When a poor little heart is broken, I can fill it with mine. I’m afraid I haven’t been entirely honest with you, Ruby. ''[bares their fangs]''
:'''Ruby''': '''NO!'''
:'''Curious Cat''': I’m not like the other Afterans here, I’m cursed with curiosity. I need to know everything! ''[their eyes turn black]'' But more than anything, I need to know why my makers left me here… ''[hisses]'' Only to leave and make all of-- OW!! ''[turns around to find Little biting his tail]''
:'''Little''': You’re not a friend! Friends don’t--!
:''[The Cat swats Little away from his tail, sending the mouse to the floor. Little slowly recovers. Neo runs back inside the manor. The Cat hisses at Neo. He tries to fire another beam, but Neo turns out to be another glass copy. The real Neo is behind him and she swats away the Cat with Hush.]''
:'''Little''': Ruby! ''[pulls Ruby by her finger]'' You have to get up. We have to go!
:''[As Little tries to drag Ruby, Neo suddenly crushes them below her heel. Neo sneers down on Ruby with Neo-Roman standing behind her. Ruby becomes utterly horrified after Little was killed in front of her, the light in her eyes is gone. Neo nudges the teacup in front of her again.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': Hmph. I think it’s about time we all got what we deserve. ''[Ruby slowly moves her body. Weiss, Blake, Yang, Jaune and Juniper finally arrive only to see Neo looking down on the wounded Ruby]'' Are you ready to admit the truth? That the world would just be better off without you?
:''[Ruby, having had up to hear with &quot;evil all along&quot; characters, her plans to help people being ruined and what Jaune yelled to her earlier, stares at her teammates, Jaune and Juniper, thinking that they're another one of Neo's clones. She then slowly picks up the teacup in her hands. She gives them one last look. Yang watches in shock as Ruby drinks the entire tea, to Neo's satisfaction. Ruby drops the teacup and lies there, completely helpless and hopeless.]''
:'''Yang''': ''[muted]'' ...Ruby?
:''[A hole appears below Ruby and she falls into it along with Little, Crescent Rose, the teacup and the tea plate engulfed in a bright light.]''
-----
===A Tale Involving a Tree [Volume 9, Episode 9]===

===Of Solitude and Self [Volume 9, Episode 10]===
''[Inside the Tree, Ruby has witnessed Summer's final departure from Patch]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': What... what ''was'' that?! She... she ''lied!'' She left with ''Raven!'' Why would she-
:'''Blacksmith''': Who knows, why people keep the secrets they do? Maybe ''you're'' not the only one who has ''felt'' the weight of others' expectations. Like Alyx... like your mother.
''[After a pause, Ruby angrily shoves over the case containing her mother's axe-rifle, causing it to shatter.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Are you just trying to tell me that it's useless? That I shouldn't even ''try?'' Is that the big ''lesson'' I'm supposed to learn? Just- give up?! ''[falls to her knees, softly]'' Become... someone ''else?''  
:'''Blacksmith''': ''Is''... that what I'm telling you?
''[Back in the Tree, Jaune comes to in a cloud of the leaf-smoke]''
:'''Alyx''': ''You'' never were the hero.
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''Alyx.''
:'''Alyx''': ''You,'' couldn't save me.
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[sadly]'' I... couldn't save a ''lot'' of people. 
:'''Alyx''': Maybe, it's time for a ''change.'' To be the kind of man, you've ''always'' wanted to be. 
''[She offers her hand; after a moment he takes it, and they emit light. Jaune stumbles out of the cloud of smoke, onto a branch below the platform. He notices some of the Tree's branches burning as the Curious Cat-possessing Neo- battles Blake, Weiss and Yang, trying to reach Ruby's chrysalis.]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': The leaves! Burn the leaves! ''[he cuts several branches and tosses them near the Cat. Blake and Yang ignite them with Dust, while Weiss uses her Semblance to blast the Cat with the resulting smoke.]''
:'''Curious Cat''': ''[cackles]'' Taking a page out of the ''Caterpillar's'' book? ''[smirks and inhales deeply]'' The leaves have no effect on ''me''.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Maybe not... but that's not the case for ''Neo.''
''[The Cat suddenly convulses and chokes, collapsing as images of Neo's past flash through their joined mind]''
:'''Curious Cat''': ''No!'' These regrets- these ''feelings!'' I can't- I ''can't!-''
''[The Cat is expelled from Neo's body in a burst of magic. Neo staggers away, disoriented, as the Cat takes it's final, enlarged form and attacks]''
:'''Blacksmith''': Your time is running out. ''[appears behind Ruby]'' You must choose. Choose for yourself, one who can leave your burdens behind... or choose one, who would be ''enough'', to bear them.
''[As the Cat battles her friends, knocking Jaune to the ground, Ruby stares around the circle of encased weapons, pondering several. She finally slumps in front of Alyx's dagger, dejected. A red glow behind her suddenly catches her attention]''
:'''Summer Rose''': ''[voiceover]'' I love you... ''just'' the way you are.
''[Ruby rushes toward the light, as all the other cases glow, sink down and vanish. She stops in front of the last case- revealed to contain the glow's source: her own weapon, Crescent Rose.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''This one''. What happens... if I choose, ''me?''
:'''Blacksmith''': ''[puts a hand on her shoulder]'' Then maybe... that girl is ''enough.''
''[Ruby smiles and reaches forward. Back in the Tree, cracks begin to form on Ruby's chrysalis, emitting light. Trailing rose petals, she plummets into the dark, her scythe ahead of her. Smiling, she reaches out and grabs it. Her chrysalis suddenly explodes open in a burst of light, catching the combatants' attention. Ruby emerges and unfolds Crescent Rose, her expression stern and her mother's rose emblem back on her belt.]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Ruby!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You're- you're ''you!''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': How?
:'''Jaune Arc''': She knew... what she needed to be. All along.
:'''Curious Cat''': ''[cackles] HOW PURR-FECT!''
''[it lunges, but Ruby quickly drives it back with several swift slashes. The Cat almost manages to grab her, but Ruby dodges with her Semblance and shoots it in the face, blasting it back and leaving it encircled by Team RWBY. All four Huntresses begin to strike the Cat with a relentless series of well-coordinated attacks. They join for a final combined strike, slamming the Cat to the ground and forcing it back into it's regular form]''
:'''Curious Cat''':''[weakly]'' YOU'RE BROKEN! You break ''everything you touch!'' Like all the Humans! Weak! Confused! ''Incomplete!!!''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': No. You're wrong. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': She's never been ''any'' of those things.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''That's'' why we follow her. 
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[smiles at her team] We're'' going to Remnant. And ''you're'' staying here.
''[As they move toward Jaune, the Cat snarls and jumps at Ruby from behind, but it is suddenly caught- by multiple Jabberwalkers]''
:'''Curious Cat''': No, no- ''NO, NO!!!''-
''[The Jabberwalkers devour the Cat as the horrified Team RWBY glances toward Neo, who had conjured the Jabberwalkers before collapsing again. They hurry to help Jaune up, then embrace Ruby. Neo watches wistfully, accompanied by her illusion of Roman.]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': To have what ''they'' have... What a thing, huh? ''[Neo walks to the edge of the stump and glances into the Tree's branches, below]'' So... that's it, then? ''[Neo turns and carresses his cheek; he smiles sadly]'' Yeah...I know. I'm not real. ''[He disappears as Team RWBY and Jaune watch]'' 
:'''Jaune Arc''': What about her?
''[Neo points Hush at the group mockingly, then tips Roman's bowler hat and bows to them. She jumps back off the edge, opens Hush's parasol and drifts into the foliage below, smiling.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': She'll find herself... one way, or another.
''[A wooden chrysalis of Neo sprouts from a nearby branch, showing she has chosen to Ascend.]''
-----
:'''Ruby Rose''': When I was in the Tree... I never saw Little. I wish I could say, 'thank you.'
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Do you guys think... we might've made things, even worse, in the Ever After? Just like Alyx did? 
:'''Ruby Rose''': I'm... not sure. I'd like to think that we did at least, a ''little'' good. Right?
:'''Little''': Wait!
''[Ruby spins around to see Little rushing up to her- but much larger than before, and wearing a cape and outfit that vaguely resembles hers]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Little! 
:'''Ascended Little''': Uh... Do I know you? ''[Ruby frowns]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Oh! Uh... ''[smiles]'' I don't believe we've met, yet. Please: what are you? 
:'''Ascended Little''': I'm... well, y'know, I haven't thought about it yet. You look like ''you'' have your wits about you. What do you think I am?  
:'''Ruby Rose''': Well, uh... To ''me'' you seem like... a ''friend.'' 
:'''Blake Belladonna''': A guide!
:'''Weiss Schnee''': A protector.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': A-''dorable! [Weiss laughs]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Do any of those sound close? 
:'''Ascended Little''': ''[scratches their chin]'' Hmmm... ''Somewhat.[brightens]'' Yeah! Somewhat. I'm not any of one thing, I'm ''Somewhat'' of a lot of things!
:'''Ruby Rose''': It is a true pleasure to meet you, Somewhat. 
:'''Somewhat''': ''[bows]'' It will be my honor to serve you!
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[smiles]'' You've... already done more for us than you know.
:'''Somewhat''': ...You ''do'' feel familiar. Like a... happy dream, I can't remember.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tears up]'' I'm ''so'' glad we got to meet you. I'm sure you'll help ''lots'' of people. But now, we have to say goodbye. ''[she and Somewhat hug]'' 
:'''Somewhat''': ...It will be all right, Huntress. 
:'''Jaune Arc''': Hey, Somewhat?
:'''Somewhat''': ''[rushes over]'' I am at your service! 
:'''Jaune Arc''': Will you look after Juniper? ''[scratches her chin and presses his forehead to hers]'' She means the world to me. 
:'''Somewhat''': I will ''never'' leave her side. 
''[he climbs on Juniper's back, and they start away as Team RWBY and Jaune grip hands and walk into the Tree's portal]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://rwby.wikia.com/wiki/RWBY_Wiki RWBY Wikia]
* [http://roosterteeth.com/home.php Rooster Teeth Productions]
* [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUBVPK8x-XMhCW2fW7ZYlD9MHjvmT8IGK YouTube: RWBY Playlist]
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/ RWBY Reddit]

[[Category:Internet shows]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>k5wd0fn7s7iub71i7l4ge80zhaibr40</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965206</id>
      <parentid>3965153</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:53:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39075-05</username>
        <id>3348841</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Of Solitude and Self [Volume 9, Episode 10] */</comment>
      <origin>3965206</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="173792" sha1="gmxy51nxfzfbmll22yuqdwj3vi92zhv" xml:space="preserve">{{tv-cleanup}}
[[File:Team RWBY Volume 9.png|thumb]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:RWBY|RWBY]]'''''  (pronounced &quot;Ruby&quot;) is an American Anime inspired web series that was created by [[w:Monty Oum|Monty Oum]] for [[w:Rooster Teeth|Rooster Teeth Productions]]. If you are unable to find the quote you are looking for, a user-created transcript searcher is available [https://glqv.bitbucket.io/rwby/quotes/ here.]

== Dialogue ==

== Volume 1 ==
===Ruby Rose [Volume 1, Episode 1]===

:'''Ozpin''': So...''[He and Goodwitch look at footage of Ruby fighting off several of Torchwick's henchmen]'' Where did you learn to do this?
:'''Ruby''': S-Signal Academy.
:'''Ozpin''': They taught you to use one of the most dangerous weapons ever designed?
:'''Ruby''': Well, one teacher in particular.
:'''Ozpin''': I see...''[Puts a plate of cookies on the table in front of Ruby. Ruby hesitantly eats one, looks at Ozpin, then eats more]'' It's just that I've only seen one other scythe-wielder of that skill before. A dusty, old crow.
:'''Ruby''': ''[Mumbles with a mouthful of cookies.]'' Thas ma unca Mmmf! ''[Ozpin stares at her; Ruby quickly swallows and clears her throat]'' Sorry. That's my Uncle Qrow. He's a teacher at Signal. I was complete garbage before he took me under his wing. Now, I'm all, like ''[does karate arm moves and light shouts]''
:'''Ozpin''': So I've noticed.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': I wonder who we're gonna meet.
:'''Yang''': I just hope they're better than &quot;Vomit Boy&quot;.
:'''Ruby''': Oh, Yang, gross, you have puke on your shoe!
:'''Yang''': Gross, gross, gross...
:'''Ruby''': Get away, get away! Get away from me! Get away from me! Get away from me! Get away from me!

===The Shining Beacon [Volume 1, Episode 2]===
:'''Ruby''': Hey, I said I was sorry, Princess!
:'''Blake''': It's Heiress, actually. Weiss Schnee, heiress, to the Schnee Dust Company, one of the largest producers of energy propellant in the world.
:'''Weiss''': Finally, some recognition!
:'''Blake''': The same company infamous for its controversial labor forces and questionable business partners.
:'''Weiss''': -What- How dare-!
''[Ruby started to laugh]''
:'''Weiss''': The nerve of-! ''[Weiss snatch her dust from Blake and walk away]'' Ugh!

===The Shining Beacon Pt. 2 [Volume 1, Episode 3]===
:'''Yang''': So, how's your first day going, little sister?
:'''Ruby''': You mean since you ditched me and I exploded?
:'''Yang''': Yikes, meltdown already?
:'''Ruby''': No, I literally exploded a hole in front of the school. And there was fire and I think some ice.
:'''Yang''': Are you being sarcastic?
:'''Ruby''': I wish! I tripped over some crabby girl's luggage, and then she yelled at me, and I sneezed, and then I exploded, and then she yelled again, and I felt really, really bad, and I just wanted her to stop yelling at me! ''[During this, the camera pans over to reveal Weiss standing right behind Ruby, listening the whole time]''
:'''Weiss''': YOU!
:'''Ruby''': ''[Jumps into Yang's arms]'' Oh God, it's happening again!
:'''Weiss''': You're lucky we weren't blown off the side of the cliff!
:'''Yang''': ''[Deadpan]'' Oh my God, you really exploded. 
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Ruby''': As a girl, I wanted to be just like those heroes in the books... Someone who fought for what was right, and protected people who couldn't protect themselves!
:'''Blake''': That's...very ambitious for a child. Unfortunately, the real world isn't the same as a fairy tale.
:'''Ruby''': Well, that's why we're here.  To make it better.
:'''Weiss''': What in the world is going on over here!? Don't you realize some of us are trying to sleep!? ''[After seeing it's Ruby who woke her up]''
:'''Weiss and Yang''': OH, NOT YOU AGAIN!
:'''Ruby''': Shh! Guys, she's right! People are trying to sleep!
:'''Weiss''': Oh, now you're on my side. 
:'''Ruby''': I was always on your side!
:'''Yang''': Yeah, What's your problem with my sister? She's only trying to be nice!
:'''Weiss''': She's a hazard to my health!
''[Blake blows out the candles]''

===The Emerald Forest [Volume 1, Episode 6]===
:'''Ruby''': What was that!?  That should have been easy!
:'''Weiss''': Well, perhaps, if you had used even the slightest amount of caution in the placement of your strikes, I wouldn't have set the forest on fire!
:'''Ruby''': What's that supposed to mean!?
:'''Weiss''': I'm just surprised that someone who talks so much could communicate so little during an encounter.
:'''Ruby''': Well, I'm sorry that you need my help to win a fight.  I'm just fine on my own!
:'''Weiss''': Well, congratulations on being the strongest child to sneak your way into Beacon.  Bravo.
'''Players and Pieces [Volume 1, Episode 8]'''
:'''Weiss''': ''[She and Ruby are riding on the back of a Nevermore]'' RUBY! I told you that this was a terrible idea!
:'''Ruby''': We'll be fine! Stop worrying!
:'''Weiss''': I am ''so'' beyond worrying!
:'''Ruby''': ...In a good way?
:'''Weiss''': In a BAD way! In a VERY BAD way!
:'''Ruby''': Well, why don't we just jump?
:'''Weiss''': What, are you insane?! ''[Sees Ruby has already jumped]'' Oh, you insufferable little red-!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Yang''': I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! Could everyone just chill out for two seconds before something crazy happens again?!
:'''Ruby''': Uh, Yang? ''[Points up to the sky]''
:'''Weiss''': ''[Hanging off a claw of a flying Nevermore]'' How could you leave me?!
:'''Ruby''': I said &quot;jump&quot;!
:'''Blake''': She's going to fall.
:'''Ruby''': She'll be fine.
:'''Ren''': She's falling.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Yang prepare to take down a Grimm Nevermore. Yang and Blake stretch one of Blake's ribbons between two pillars. Ruby stands on the ribbon, while Weiss uses her semblance to pull it back, like a slingshot.]''
:'''Weiss''': Of course, ''you'' would come up with this idea.
:'''Ruby''': Think you can make the shot?
:'''Weiss''': ''[Smugly]'' Hmph, can I?
:'''Ruby''': ...Can-?
:'''Weiss''': Of course I can!

===The Badge and The Burden [Volume 1, Episode 9]===

''[After Weiss wakes up, Ruby blows a whistle]''
:'''Weiss''': Gah! ''[Falls down]''
:'''Ruby''': Goooood morning, Team RWBY!
:'''Weiss''': What in the world is wrong with you?!
:'''Ruby''': Now that you're awake, we can begin our first order of business.
:'''Weiss''': Excuse me?
:'''Yang''': Decorating!
:'''Weiss''': What?
:'''Blake''': We still have to unpack...''[Holds up her suitcase, which falls open, spilling out all its contents]'' And clean.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Yang decorate and furnish their room. When they finish, they see the beds are cluttered together]''
:'''Weiss''': This...isn't going to work.
:'''Blake''': It is a bit cramped.
:'''Yang''': Maybe we should ditch some of our stuff.
:'''Ruby''': Or...we could ditch the beds ''[Gasps]'' And replace them with BUNK BEDS!
:'''Weiss''': Um, that sounds incredibly dangerous.
:'''Yang''': And super awesome!
:'''Blake''': It ''does'' seem efficient.
:'''Weiss''': Well, we should put it to a vote.
:'''Ruby''': I think we just did.
:''[Blake gives a thumbs-up, Yang gives a &quot;rock on&quot; gesture, both accompanied by a &quot;bing&quot; sound, followed by Weiss frowning, accompanied by a buzzer.]''

'''The Badge and The Burden Part 2 [Volume 1, Episode 10]'''
:''[Weiss is complaining to Professor Port about Ozpin's choice to name Ruby the team leader]''
:'''Weiss''': Excuse me?
:'''Professor Port''': I believed in Professor Ozpin for many years, and the man's never once led me astray.
:'''Weiss''': So, you would just blindly accept his decision, even after seeing how exceptional I am?
:'''Professor Port''': With all due respect, your exceptional skill on the battlefield is matched only by your poor attitude.
:'''Weiss''': How dare you!
:'''Professor Port''': My point, exactly. I see a girl who has spent her entire life getting exactly what she wanted.
:'''Weiss''': That's not even remotely true! ''[Professor Port raises an eyebrow]'' Well, not ''entirely'' true...

===Jaunedice [Volume 1, Episode 11]===
:'''Nora''': So.  There we were.  In the middle of the night!
:'''Ren''': It was day.
:'''Nora''': And we were surrounded by Ursai...
:'''Ren''': They were Beowolves.
:'''Nora''': Dozens of them!
:'''Ren''': Two of them.

===Jaunedice Part 2 [Volume 1, Episode 12]===
:'''Oobleck''': Mr. Arc! Finally contributing to class! This is excellent! Excellent! What is the answer?
:'''Jaune''': Uhh... the answer... the advantage... of the faunus... had over that guy's stuff... ''[Sees Pyrrha making a gesture]'' Uh, b-binoculars!

===Forever Fall Part 2 [Volume 1, Episode 14]===
:'''Pyrrha''': Well, Ruby has her speed, Weiss has her glyphs, my semblance is polarity.
:'''Ruby''': Whoa, you can control poles...
:'''Weiss''': No, you dunce! It means she has control over magnetism!
:'''Ruby''': Magnets are cool, too...

===The Stray [Volume 1, Episode 15]===
:'''Penny''': You call me friend. Am I really your friend?
:'''Ruby''': Ahh! ''[Then Weiss, Blake, and Yang want her to say no]'' Yeah, sure! Why not?! ''[Then they faint]''
:'''Penny''': Ahaha! Sen-sational! We can paint our nails and try out clothes and talk about cute boys!
:'''Ruby''': Ooh, is this what it was like when you met me?
''[After Weiss gets up, and brush herself]''
:'''Weiss''': No, she seems ''far'' more coordinated. 
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Weiss''': Wait, you're fighting in the tournament?
:'''Penny''': I'm combat ready!
:'''Weiss''': Forgive me, but you hardly look the part.
:'''Blake''': Says the girl wearing a dress.
:'''Weiss''': It's a combat skirt!
''[Ruby, wearing a combat skirt as well, stands next to Weiss]'' 
:'''Ruby''': Yeah! ''[She and Weiss slap hands]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Weiss''': You realize that you're defending an organization that hates humanity, don't you?  The Faunus of the White Fang are pure evil!
:'''Blake''': There's no such thing as pure evil!  Why do you think they hate humanity so much?  It's because of people like Cardin, people like ''you'' that force the White Fang to take such drastic measures!
:'''Weiss''': People like me!?
:'''Blake''': You're discriminatory!
:'''Weiss''': I'm a victim!  ''[walks to the window]''  You wanna know why I despise the White Fang?  Why I don't particularly trust the Faunus?  It's because they've been at war with my grandfather's company for years.  War as in actual bloodshed.  And as far as I could remember, the company has had a target painted on them.  Family friends kept disappearing.  Board members executed.  An entire trainload of dust stolen.  Every night, my father would come home from work, furious and that made for a very!  Difficult!  Childhood!
:'''Ruby''': Weiss, I...
:'''Weiss''': No!  You wanna know why I despise the White Fang?  It's because they are a bunch of liars!  Thieves!  And murderers!
:'''Blake''': Well, maybe we were just tired of being pushed around!

===Black and White [Volume 1, Episode 16]===
:'''Ruby''': Blaaake?!
:'''Yang''': Blaaake?!
:'''Ruby''': Blaaake?! Where are yooouuu?! 
:'''Yang''': Blake!!
:'''Ruby''': Weiss, You're not helping!
:'''Weiss''': Oh! You know who might be able to help? The police.
:'''Ruby''': Ugh. Weiss...
:'''Weiss''': It was just an idea!
:'''Ruby''': Yeah, a bad one.
:'''Yang''': Weiss, I think we should hear her side of the story before we jump to any conclusions.
:'''Weiss''': I think when we hear it, you'll all realize I was right.
:'''Penny''': And I think Weiss's hair looks wonderful today!
:'''Ruby''': Agh!! Penny!! Where did you come from!?
:'''Penny''': Hey Guys. What are you up to?
:'''Ruby''': Uuuhhhhh...
:'''Yang''': We're looking for our friend Blake.
:'''Penny''': Oh... you mean the Faunus girl.
:'''Ruby''': Wait, how did you know that?
:'''Penny''': Uh, the cat ears?
:'''Yang''': What cat ears? She wears a... bow...
:''[Long pause]''
:'''Ruby''': ''[Whispers to Yang]'' She ''does'' like tuna a lot...
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Sun''': ''[offers Blake an apple]'' &quot;I stole you some food.&quot;
:'''Blake''': Do you always break the law without a second thought?
:'''Sun''': Hey, weren't you in a cult or something?
:'''Blake''': ''[glares at Sun]''
:'''Sun''': Okay.  Too soon.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Blake''': Weiss. I want you to know that I'm no longer associated with the White Fang. Back when I was with-
:'''Weiss''': Do you have any idea how long we've been searching for you?... Twelve Hours. That means I've had twelve hours to think about this. And in that twelve hours I've decided... ''[Yang, Sun, and Ruby waiting for Weiss to answer]'' I don't care! 
:'''Blake''': You don't care?
:'''Weiss''': You said you're not one of them anymore, right?
:'''Blake''': No, I-I haven't been since I was younger-
:'''Weiss''': Upupupupup! I don't wanna hear it. All I want know, is that the next time something this big comes up... you'll come to your teammates, and not some... ''[Weiss look at Sun]'' someone else.
:'''Blake''': Of course.
:'''Ruby''': Yeah! Team RWBY is back together!
''[Team RWBY and Sun come together]''
:'''Weiss''': I'm still not quite sure how I feel about you!
:'''Sun''': ''[Nervous laugh]''

== Volume 2 ==

===Best Day Ever [Volume 2, Episode 1]===
:''[After teams RWBY and JNPR have a food-fight that nearly destroys the entire dining hall, Goodwitch arrives and promptly fixes everything with a wave of her riding crop]''
:'''Glynda Goodwitch''': Children, please...do not play with your food.
:''[Nora belches and Yang crashes back down after Nora launched her through the roof, RWBY and JNPR quietly laugh with one another. Goodwitch starts to grow more angry]''
:'''Professor Ozpin''': Let it go.
:'''Glynda Goodwitch''': ''[Calms down and sighs]'' They're supposed to be the defenders of the world.
:'''Professor Ozpin''': And they will be. But, right now, they're still children. So, why not let them play the part? After all...it isn't a role they'll have forever.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Oh look, she sent the kids again! ''[ruffles Emerald and Mercury's hair]'' This is turning out just like the ''divorce.''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[jerks away]'' Ugh. Spare us the thought of you procreating.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''That'', was a joke.  And this..  ''[Picks a card from her pocket]''  ...might just tell me what you two have been doing all day.
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': What-?  ''[hastily checks her pocket]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': I'm a ''professional'', sweetheart. Pay attention, Maybe you'll learn something. Why do you have this address?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Wouldn't you like to know?
:'''Roman Torchwick''':  Yeah, I ''would''.  Now, what were you two doing again?
:'''Mercury Black''': Cleaning up ''your problems.''  Well, one of them at least.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[sharply]'' I had that ''under control''.
:'''Mercury Black''': ''[smirks]'' Two packed bags and a ticket out of Vale said otherwise.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[raises his cane]'' Listen you little punk, If it were up to me I would take you and your little street-rat friend here, and I would-
:'''Cinder Fall''': Do ''what'', Roman?
''[Cinder appears at the top of the elevator, descending toward them]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[Chuckles]'' I'd, uh... ''not'' kill them?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Cinder!
:'''Cinder Fall''': I thought I made it clear, that you were to eliminate the would-be runaway.
:'''Roma Torchwick''': I was going to!
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': He was going to escape to Vacuo. Mercury and I decided to take it upon ourselves to kill the rat.
:'''Mercury Black''': I think he was some sort of cat, actually.
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': What, like a puma?
:'''Mercury Black''': Yeah, there ya go.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Quiet. Did I not specifically instruct you two to keep your hands ''clean'' while in Vale?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': I just thought-
:'''Cinder''': Don't think... ''Obey. [Behind her, Roman makes a mock throat-slitting gesture]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Yes, ma'am. It won't happen again.
:'''Cinder Fall''': And as for you, Roman, why wasn't this job done sooner?
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[gestures to the warehouse's contents, all around them]'' Uh... eh?  Eh? ''EH!?''  Sorry if I've been stealing every last speck of Dust in the kingdom!
:'''Mercury Black''': You truly are an inspiration for every punk with a gun and a ski mask.
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Look around you, kid. Police routed at every corner, dust prices through the roof, and we're sitting pretty atop more dust, crystals, vials, and rounds than we know what to do with!  Speaking of which, if you guys wouldn't mind filling me ''in'' on your grand master plan, it ''might'' actually help my next string of robberies go a little smoother!
:'''Cinder Fall''': Oh, Roman... Have a little ''faith. [touches his cheek, her eyes glinting]''  You'll know what you need when you ''need'' to know.

===Welcome to Beacon [Volume 2, Episode 2]===
:'''Ironwood''': But ask yourself this: do you honestly think that your children can win a war?
''[Ironwood leaves.]''
:'''Ozpin''': I hope they never have to.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Yang''': Pretty sneaky sis, [[w:Yu-Gi-Oh!|but you've just activated my trap card!]]
:'''Ruby''': ''[Shrieked]'' WHAT!
:'''Yang''': Giant Nevermore!  If I roll a seven or higher, fatal feathers will slice your fleet in two!
:'''Ruby''': But, if you roll a six or lower, the Nevermore will turn on your own forces!
:'''Yang''': That's a risk that I am willing to take.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Yang''': Well, Weiss, it's your turn.
:'''Weiss''': I have... absolutely no idea what's going on.
:'''Yang''': Look.  It's easy.  You're playing as Vacuo which means all Vacuo based cards come with a bonus
:'''Weiss''': That sounds dumb.
:'''Yang''': ''[shuffles through Weiss's cards]''  See, you've got Sandstorm, Desert Scavage, Oh, oh!  Resourceful Raider!  See, now you could take Ruby's discarded airfleet... ''[Ruby sobs]'' and put it in ''your'' hand!
:'''Weiss''': Okay.
:'''Yang''': And since Vacuo warriors have an endurance boost against natural hazards, you could use Sandstorm to disable my ground forces and simultaniously infiltrate my kingdom!  Just know that I will not forget this declaration of war.
:'''Weiss''': And that means...
:'''Ruby''': You're just three moves away from conquoring Remnant!
:'''Weiss''': ''[Evil laughing]'' YES! FEAR THE ALMIGHTY POWER OF MY FORCES! COWER AS THEY PILLAGE YOUR HOMES AND WEEP AS THEY TAKE YOUR CHILDREN FROM YOUR VERY ARMS-!
:'''Yang''': Trap card.
:'''Weiss''': Huh?
:'''Yang''': Your armies have been destroyed.
:'''Weiss''': ''[sobs]'' I hate this game of emotions we play!
:'''Ruby''': ''[Crying as well, embracing Weiss]'' Stay strong, Weiss. We'll make it through this together.
:'''Weiss''': ''[Reciprocating the hug]'' Shut up! Don't touch me!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Jaune''': Hey! Can I play?
:'''Ruby''': Sorry Jaune, we've already got four people.
:'''Weiss''': Besides, this game requires a certain level of tactical cunning that I seriously doubt you possess.
:'''Yang''': Uhh... You attacked your own navel fleet two turns ago.
:'''Weiss''': Hmph!
:'''Jaune''': Bring it on, Ice Queen! I had you know that I've been told I'm a natural born leader.
:'''Weiss''': By who? your mother?!
:'''Jaune''': And Pyrrha!
:'''Pyrrha''': Hello again!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Sun''': 'Sup losers!
''[Sun and Neptune appear]''
:'''Ruby''': Hey, Sun!
:'''Sun''': Ruby, Yang, Blake, Ice Queen...
:'''Weiss''': Why does everyone keep calling me that!?
:'''Sun''': I never got a chance to formally introduce you to my old friend.
:'''Neptune''': Uh... aren't libraries for reading?
:'''Ren''': ''[Team JNPR is sitting at a table nearby, studying; Nora's sleeping]'' Thank you!
:'''Nora''': ''[Jolts awake]'' Pancakes!
:'''Sun''': Shut up. Don't be a nerd.
:'''Neptune''': Intellectual. Okay. Thank you. I'm Neptune.
:'''Weiss''': So, Neptune, where are you from? 
:'''Neptune''': Haven... And I don't believe I've caught your name, snow angel.
:'''Weiss''': Um... I'm Weiss.
:'''Jaune''': ''[Having earlier addressed Weiss as &quot;snow angel&quot;] Are you kidding me!?
:'''Neptune''': Pleasure to meet you.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Ruby''': Let's hatch a plan
:'''Yang''': Yeah!
:'''Ruby''': Ahh! I left my board game in the library!
:'''Weiss''': We're doomed.

===A Minor Hiccup [Volume 2, Episode 3]===
:''[After seeing Sun at the window, Team RWBY backs away]''
:'''Blake''': Sun!
:'''Yang''': How did you get up there? 
:'''Sun''': Ah it's easy. I do it all the time.
:'''Weiss''': You do what?!
:'''Sun''': I climb trees all the time! ''[Weiss narrows her glare at Sun, who flips into the room]'' So... are we finally getting back at that Torchwick guy?
:'''Blake''': WE, are going to investigate the situation. ''[Gestures to the rest of RWBY]'' As a TEAM.
:'''Ruby''': Sorry Sun, we don't want to get friends involved if we don't have to.
:'''Sun''': Psh! That's dumb! We should always get friends involved. That's why I brought Neptune.
:''[RWBY looks out the window, and sees Neptune standing on the ledge right next to the window, back firmly against the wall]''
:'''Neptune''': 'Sup?
:'''Ruby''': How did you even get up here?
:'''Neptune''': I have my ways. ''[Looks down]'' Seriously though, can I come in? We're like, really high up right now.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': All right. I'll go with Weiss. Sun, you can go with Blake. And Neptune, you can go with Yang since she doesn't have a partner. Everyone good?
:'''Weiss''': Actually Ruby, why don't you go with Yang, heh. After all she is your sister.
:'''Ruby''': But Weiss, who would go with you then?
:'''Weiss''': Well, I guess Neptune could come with me.
:'''Ruby''': ''[laughs]'' Nah. ''[Walks out of the room, dragging Weiss behind her]''
:'''Weiss''': But! But!

===Painting the Town [Volume 2, Episode 4]===
:'''Gangster #1''': Hurry, close the door she's coming!
:''[Two gangsters close the door]''
:'''Junior''': What are you two idiots doing!?
:''[Two gangsters trying to talk to Junior, until the door explodes open. Yang walks in]'' 
:'''Yang''': Guess who's back!
:''[A bunch of Junior's &quot;staff&quot; point their guns at Yang. The music being played in the club starts to skip. Yang gives a look to the DJ, who briefly comes out of hiding to turn off the record.]''
:'''Neptune''': Yeah, so could you define &quot;friend&quot; for me?
:'''Junior''': Stop, stop! Nobody shoot. Blondie! You're here. Why?
:'''Yang''': You still owe me a drink. ''[Yang drags Junior to the bar]''
:'''Neptune''': Whoa, what a woman... ''[looking at Malachite twins]'' 'Sup?
:'''Malachite Twins''': ''[Walking away]'' Hmm. Whatever.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sun''': I don't get it.  If you believe that what you're doing is right, why hide who you are?
:'''Blake''': The masks are a symbol.  Humanity wanted to make monsters out of us, so we chose to don the faces of monsters.
:'''Sun''': Grimm masks?  That's kinda dark.
:'''Blake''': So is the guy that started it.
:'''Sun''': Always sunshine and rainbows with you.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Junior''': I don't know
:'''Yang''': How can you not know?
:'''Junior''': I haven't talked to him. I haven't even seen him since the night you first came in here. He paid upfront, I lent him my men, and none of them ever came back.
:'''Neptune''': So where did they go?
:'''Junior''': What kind of stupid question is that? They never came back! Who is this guy?
:'''Yang''': Don't worry about him.  Worry about me if I don't get what I want.
:'''Junior''': I haven't seen him since that night!  Torchwick hired my boys, and I guess he wasn't happy with them. WHICH IS SOMETHING I CAN RELATE TO!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[Yang tries to fire at him, but her attack gets blocked by Neopolitan]'' Ladies, Ice Queen..
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Hey!
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Always a pleasure. Neo, if you would...
:''[Neopolitan gives an elegant bow to RWBY. Yang charges at Neo and Roman, but when she strikes them, they shatter to pieces, and they're then seen flying away on an aircraft]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': So, I guess he got a new henchman.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Yeah, I guess she really made our plans...&quot;fall apart&quot;, huh?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': No, just...no.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': What? But you do it!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': There's a time and a place for jokes.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Was this not it?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No, it was just not very good.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Well, at least I'm trying!
:'''Ruby''': Wait, Where are Sun and Neptune?
:''[At the noodle house, Sun and Neptune eating noodles]''
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': They're probably fine, right?
:'''Sun Wukong''': Probably.

===Extracurricular [Volume 2, Episode 5]===
:'''Jaune''': ''[While playing guitar]'' ♫Weeeiiisssss♫ ''[Then wink]''
''[Weiss slams the door closed]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[Knocks three times]'' Oh come on. ''[Knocks three times]'' Open the door... I promise not to sing.
''[Weiss opens the door again]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[While playing guitar]'' ♫I liiieed♫ ♫Weiss Schnee, will you accompany me, to the dance on... Sunday!♫
:'''Weiss''': Are you done?
:'''Jaune''': ...Yes?
:'''Weiss''': NO. ''[Closes the door to Jaune face, then turns to Ruby and Yang]'' What?
:'''Yang''': And that's why they call you the Ice Queen.
''[Ruby fell down]''
:'''Weiss''': All my life, boys have only cared about the perks of my last name. Besides, I already have a date in mind.
===Burning the Candle [Volume 2, Episode 6]===
:'''Jaune Arc''': It's Weiss. I'm completely head-over-heels for her, and she won't even give me a chance. She's cold, but she's also incredible. She's smart, and graceful, and talented. I mean, have you heard her sing? I-I just wish she's take me seriously, y'know? I wish I could tell her how I feel without messing it all up.
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Then do it.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Uh, wha-?
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Tell her exactly what you said. No ridiculous schemes, No pick-up lines. Just... be honest.
:'''Jaune Arc''': But, wh-
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Jaune. You can't get it wrong if it's the truth
:'''Jaune Arc''': ... You're right. Thanks, Pyrrha. ''[To Ren]'' Good talk, Ren! 
''[Jaune leaves to go to Weiss. Pyrrha smiles until Jaune leaves, then turns somber and walks to the other side of the room. Nora watches her]''
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': ''[sighs]'' Practice what you preach, Pyrrha.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You don't understand! I'm the only one who can do this!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No...''[Turns to Blake, her eyes now red]'' YOU don't understand! If Roman Torchwick walked through that door right now, what would you do?!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I'd fight him!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Shoves Blake]'' You'd LOSE!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[Shoves Yang back]'' I can stop him!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Shoves Blake harder]'' You can't even stop ME!

===Dance Dance Infiltration [Volume 2, Episode 7]===
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Hey, uh... Jaune, right?
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[sighs]'' Yeah.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': This party's pretty lame, huh? I mean, ballroom dancing: Pbbfff.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Yeah.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Cute girls though, huh?
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[Grunt]'' Is that all you think about? 
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Huh?
:'''Jaune Arc''': D-do you even care about the girls you're hitting on? How they feel about you?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Whoa, where's this coming from!?
:'''Jaune Arc''': How could you turn her down like that?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Wait, w-who?
:'''Jaune Arc''': Weiss!
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': I, uh... it, uh... It just didn't work out. Y'know?
:'''Jaune Arc''': What? You think you're too cool? Too many other options? ''Weiss Schnee'' asked you to the dance. What in the world could possibly keep you from go-
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': I can't dance.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Beg your pardon?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': I can't dance, man
:'''Jaune Arc''': But, you're... so... cool.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Thank you. I try really, really, hard.
:'''Jaune Arc''': You would rather break a girl's heart, and go to a dance alone, than... just admit to everyone that you can't move in rhythm to music?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': That about sums it up, yeah. 
:'''Jaune Arc''': Well, I certainly feel a lot better about myself. 
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Please don't tell anybody. Look, if you want Weiss, she's all yours; I don't wanna get in your way.
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[sign]'' Do you like her?
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Yeah, I mean, I don't know her too well yet, but she seems pretty cool.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Then just go ''talk'' to her. No pickup lines, no suave moves. Just be yourself. I've heard that's the way to go.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Yeah, but that isn't-
:'''Jaune Arc''': Hey, you don't have to look cool all the time. In all honesty, if you could be a little less cool, I'd really appreciate it. 
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Yeah. Okay.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Go talk to her. I guarantee it'll make her night.
:'''Neptune Vasilias''': Thanks. You're a really cool guy, Jaune.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Alright, don't lie to my face. ''[both of them fist bump, after Neptune left]'' ''[sign]'' Alright.  Only one thing left to do.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Yang''': ''[sigh]'' Tomorrow it's back to work.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Well, I'm sure we can handle whatever gets thrown at us. ''[She notices something and starts laughing]'' Except for ''that.''
''[Every student continue to laugh, until Pyrrha notices Jaune]''
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': ...Jaune? ''[Jaune is wearing a dress]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Promise is a promise.
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': ''[Laughing]'' Jaune, you didn't have to.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Hey, an Arc never goes back on his word. Now do you wanna stand there and laugh at me, or do you wanna dance?
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': I would ''love'' to dance.
''[Jaune grabs Pyrrha, and takes her to the dance floor]''
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Ren! This. is. HAPPENING!!!!!
:''' Lie Ren''': Wait. ''What'' is happening?

===Field Trip [Volume 2, Episode 8]===
:''' James Ironwood''': We send as many troops as we can to the southeast, find out exactly what's going on, and eradicate any forces that stand in our way.
:'''Glynda Goodwitch''': Why must your answer to everything involve a triumphant display of military bravado?! You treat every situation like it's a contest of measuring di-!
:'''Professor Ozpin''': Glynda!
:''' Glynda Goodwitch''': Well, he does.
:'''Professor Ozpin''': She's right, you know.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Yang''': Oh! I know what will cheer you up.
:'''Ruby''': What's that?
:'''Yang''': ''[After grabbing a mail]'' I don't know yet. Dad sent it to us. I thought we could open it together.
:'''Ruby''': ''[High pitched]'' Ooh! Something from home! ''[Rushes to Yang's back to get the mail]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Zwei''': Ruh! Ruh!
:'''Team RWBY''': Waaa-aaah!
:'''Ruby''': Zweeeiii!
:'''Blake''': He sent a dog?!
:'''Weiss''': In the mail??
:'''Ruby''': *giggles* ''[Zwei licks Ruby face]''
:'''Yang''': Oh he does stuff like this all the time.
:'''Ruby''': Stop it, ahaha! ''[Zwei continues licking Ruby face]''
:'''Blake''': ''[On the top bunk bed]'' Your father or your dog?
:'''Ruby''': I missed youuu!
:'''Weiss''': Are you telling me that this mangy...drooling...mutt is going to wiv with us foweva? Oh, yes he is yes he is! Oh isn't he adorable!
:'''Blake''': Please keep it away from my belongings.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': Beside it won't only be us out there. We'll be fighting alongside a genuine Huntsman! 
:'''Yang''': Yeah!
''[Scene cuts to RWBY showing different expressions of shock and disbelief as they see who their Huntsman is]''
:'''Oobleck''': Why, hello, girls! Who ready to fight for their lives?

'''Search and Destroy [Volume 2, Episode 9]'''
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': Ruby!''[Rwby drops her scythe]'' I thought I told you to leave all your bags back at school.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But, uh you hadn't told us to listen to you yet... So I didn't.
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': She's not wrong. Very well. Ruby, leave your bag here we can pick it up upon our return.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But I-whaa
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': Young lady, what in the world could you possibly have in that bag that could be so important for you to bring it-
''[Zwei sticks his head out of Ruby's backpack and yips]''
:'''Ruby''': ''[Whisper]'' Get back in the bag.
:'''Oobleck''': We're here to investigate an abandoned urban jungle teeming with death and hostility and you brought...a dog?
:'''Ruby Rose''': I-uhh...!
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': Genius! ''[Spin around grab Zwei leaving Ruby to the ground]'' Canines are historically known for their perceptive nose and heightened sense of sound, making them excellent companions for hunts such as ours!
''[Zwei barks]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': I'm a genius.

===Mountain Glenn [Volume 2, Episode 10]===
:'''Yang Xiao long''': Blake, are you awake?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Yeah.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Why do you think [Dr. Oobleck] asked us about being a Huntress? Like, what was he trying to say? 
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Maybe he was curious.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You think?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ...No.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Sighs]'' Weiss, are you awake?
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Of course I'm awake, you two are talking!

===No Brakes [Volume 2, Episode 11]===

:'''Oobleck''': Hurry, children! We must get to the front and stop this train!
:'''Weiss''': Uh... Professor?
:'''Oobleck''': Doctor.
:'''Weiss''': What's that?
''[Weiss pointing at a bomb]''
:'''Oobleck''': That, my dear... appears to be a bomb.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After part of the train exploded]''
:'''Oobleck''': That's not good...
:'''Ruby''': Uh, neither is this! 
''[Ruby sees another bomb]''
:'''Blake''': Another bomb?!
''[Dr. Oobleck checking on another train]''
:'''Oobleck''': No, no, no...
''[Oobleck opens the roof of the train and sees another bomb]''
:'''Oobleck''': They all have bombs!

===Breach [Volume 2, Episode 12]===
:'''Jaune''': Okay, who's first?
''[Big Ursa steps in]''
:'''Jaune''': O-oh-oh-okay. You're first, huh? Ha-ha okay. No, that's-that's fine. 
''[Pyrrha kills three Grimm, and sees Jaune facing off the big Ursa]''
:'''Jaune''': Totally fine, done this before. Done this before. ''[sigh]'' ''[Jaune starts to swing his sword a couple times, but the big Ursa doesn't collapse until five seconds later. Pyrrha smiles at him]''
''[Sun and Neptune appear]''
:'''Sun''': Nobody move, Junior Detectives!
:'''Neptune''': We have badges, so you know it's official.
''[Both of them fistbump]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Yang''': Well...we did it.
:'''Blake''': We did it.
:'''Weiss''': If we don't get extra credit for that, I'm going to be seriously disappointed.
:'''Yang''': Weiss, a two-headed snake literally crushed a bakery. I wouldn't count on it.
:'''Ruby''': Plus, I mean, we didn't solve everything. A lot of people were hurt, and we still don't even know why they did this, or who that mystery girl was.
:'''Weiss''': Well, not every story has a neat and tidy ending.
:'''Blake''': We may not have all the answers, but we do have a lot of dangerous people behind bars, and I think that's something we can be proud of.
:'''Ruby''': Yeah, and if somebody tries something like this again, we'll be there to stop them.
:'''Yang''': ''[Stretches and lays back, replies with no emotion]'' Yay, teamwork, camaraderie, good guys, go team, alright, good job. So...what now?
:'''Weiss''': I'd suggest training for the tournament, but I think we have that covered at this point.
:'''Blake''': So, then...?
:'''Ruby''': Uh, time for bed?
:'''Weiss''': Oh, please, yes.
:'''Blake''': Absolutely.
:'''Yang''': I'm going to sleep forever.

== Volume 3 ==

===Round One [Volume 3, Episode 1]===
''[RWBY fights team ABRN. Yang nearly gets attacked by Nadir. Ruby stops him]''
:'''Ruby''': I got your back!
:'''Bolin Hori''': ''[About to attack Ruby]'' Who's got yours? ''[He gets knocked away by Weiss]'' 
:'''Ruby''': My BFF!
:'''Weiss''': NO.
:'''Ruby''': ''(Whispers to herself)'' YES!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[RWBY goes to a noodles stand to eat]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I'll have a bowl of the regular, please. ''[A big bowl of noodles is put in front of her]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Uhh...I'll take the same. ''[A bowl is placed in front of her]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Hmm, do you have a low salt-? ''[A bowl looking exactly like Ruby and Yang's is put in front of her]'' Umm...okay...
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[Gives a knowing nod to the vendor, the Old Man, who nods back and rushes back into the kitchen then hurries back, placing a bowl of noodles with fish on top in front of Blake. She gasps and turns starry-eyed, drooling, her heart audibly pounding]'' Ohhhhh....
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Weiss produces a credit card to pay]'' Aw, Weiss, what's the occasion?
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Consider it &quot;Thanks for sending you to the doubles round.&quot; ''[Her card is thrown back like a throwing star, embedding itself in the counter, to the shock of the whole team. The Old Man clears his throat and points to the cash register, which says &quot;DECLINED&quot;]'' What? How can my card be declined? I was barely into my monthly allowance!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[Glances around and tries to take her bowl, but it's taken away by the Old Man]'' Nooo...
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Maybe I can help?
''[Team JNPR appears]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Pyrrha!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Aw, you don't have to!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': BUT SHE COULD!
''[Moments Team RWBY and Team JNPR have finished eating. Both Weiss and Jaune look uncomfortably full]''
:'''Lie Ren''': Are you sure it's wise to have eaten before a fight?
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': Of course. It will give us energy.
''[Nora lets out a very loud burp]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[Gives a sick groan]'' If I barf, I'm blaming you.
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Ooo! Aim it at the enemy!
:'''Lie Ren''': Nora, that's disgusting. But, if you ''do'' feel the urge...
:'''Jaune Arc''': Got it.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nora''': We've got a world-renowed fighter on our team, what's basically a ninja, I can bench five of me, ...Jaune, we've trained all year, our weapons are awesome, Glynda barely yells at us anymore, and uh... Jaune!
:'''Ren''': Are you gonna take that?
:'''Jaune''': She's not wrong...
:'''Nora''': I'm kidding! He know I'm kidding. Don't be so nervous! The worst that could happen is we lose! Then it's just a few more years of walking around school with everyone knowing we're failures, our friends will slowly abandon us to preserve their social status, ''[Starting to be nervous]'' we won't be able to show our faces in class, ''[Turning white]'' no one will sit with us in the cafeteria, Ren and I have no parents, we have no home left to go to, we'll be officially renamed Team LOSER-per! Ah ha ha ha ha! ''[Sobbing]''
:'''Ren''': Sooo yeah. We're feeling pretty good.
:'''Pyrrha''': Don't fret. If anything, we should looking forward to a fight with actual guidelines and not... Well, murderers.
:'''Yang''': Yeah don't sweat it! We've all faced way worse before.
:'''Blake''': Let's see: Grimm Invasion, violent extremists, a destructive sociopath.
:'''Ruby''': And that's all while we were still in training! Oh, imagine what it'll be like when we graduate!
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[wistfully]'' Maybe ''then'' I'll be able to pay for a meal. 

===New Challengers [Volume 3, Episode 2]===
:'''Jaune''': This is it, guys! Let's finish 'em with team attacks! Nora, Ren, Flower Power!
:'''Nora''': Wait... What?
:'''Jaune''': F-Flower Power. ''[Pyrrha, Nora, and Ren just shrug]'' That's your team attack name.
:'''Ren''': Since... when?
:'''Jaune''': Guys, we went over this! Flower Power is Ren and Nora. Ren brings the flower, Nora brings the power.
:'''Ren''': How do I bring a flower?
:'''Nora''': No, silly! Not 'a flower'! Flour! Like in baking!
:'''Ren''': Why would I bring that?
:'''Jaune''': I, uh, no, it's your symbol!
:'''Pyrrha''': So... what are we?
:'''Jaune''': Pyrrha!
:'''Pyrrha''': Sorry! I just wanna make sure it's clearly defined.
''[Team BRNZ still listen to Team JNPR]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[distantly]'' Pyrrha, you and I are Arkos. It's the thing, where we take our shields, remember?
:'''Pyrrha''': Arkos?
:'''Jaune''': Yeah. It's our names put together?
:'''Pyrrha''': Right... no, I get it.
:'''Jaune''': What, do you not like it?
:'''Pyrrha''': No, no, it's... good?
:'''Nora''': Mmm, I sensed hesitation!
:'''Brawnz''': Hey!
:'''Team JNPR''': Huh?
:'''Brawnz''': What do you think you doing?!
:'''Jaune''': Trying to have a team meeting, thank you very little.
:'''Nora''': ''[Angrily]'' Yeah! Team ears only!
:'''Brawnz''': We in the middle of a fight!
:'''Jaune''': ''[Yelled]'' And we're in the middle of the conversation! What don't you get about that?!
:'''Pyrrha''': Um, Jaune?
:'''Jaune''': Yes, Pyrrha?!
:'''Pyrrha''': I think he means that we're ALL in the middle of the fight?
''[Crowd jeering]''
:'''Jaune''': ''[Sign]'' Nora, just... hit them with the hammer.
:'''Nora''': ...GOT IT.
:'''Brawnz''': Wait... what?!
''[Nora hits all of BRNZ at once with her hammer]''
:'''Team BRNZ''': Ah!
''[Team BRNZ crash to the side wall]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Weiss''': Good luck, Neptune!
''[Neptune sees NDGO and flirts]''
:'''Neptune''': Ladies...
:'''Weiss''': ''[Angrily and yelled]'' BREAK HIS STUPID FACE, NDGO!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neptune''': Alright girls, try and remember. Hands above the waist. 
:'''Sun''': Ignore him, for he...yeah, he's dumb.
''[Neptune wink]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After NDGO got desert]''
:'''Nebula''': Alright, home field advantage
:'''Sun''': Don't get to cocky, that's my turf too.
:'''Scarlet''': I hope I don't get sand in my shoes.
:'''Neptune''': Be cool, man.
:'''Gwen''': Hey, the ocean!
:'''Neptune''': HUH?! ''[look at the water symbol and gets scared]''
:'''Ruby''': Uh... what's wrong with Neptune?
:'''Blake''': Oh no...
''[The ocean appears on the battlefield, and Neptune freezes in horror]''
:'''Blake''': Neptune's... afraid of the water.
:'''Oobleck''': Three, two, one, begin!
''[Neptune rush to the desert]''
:'''Sun''': Neptune! What are you doing?
:'''Neptune''': Oh, you know, just, uh, getting to higher ground.
:'''Sun''': On the enemy's side?!
''[Scarlet drops his jacket]''
:'''Neptune''': They would never expect it!
:'''Dew''': He's not wrong.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After Team SSSN beats Team NDGO when Neptune electrifies the water, shocking out NDGO]''
:'''Professor Port''': And with that, Team SSSN moves on to the doubles round. You know what I call that victory?
:'''Dr. Oobleck''': &quot;Shocking&quot;?
:'''Professor Port''': No, &quot;well-earned&quot;. What you said is stupid.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': Aw, that was so close!
:'''Yang''': Looks like the dorks made it to the next round.
''[Blake watches Sun and Neptune celebrate their win over NDGO. Sun turns to Blake and points to her with a wink]''
:'''Blake''': ''[Blushes]'' Emphasis on &quot;dork&quot;.
:'''Oobleck''': ''[Microphone]'' That concludes the matches for today. Please leave the coliseum in a CALM AND ORDERLY FASHION!
:'''Yang''': Come on, let's go congratulate' em!

===It's Brawl in the Family [Volume 3, Episode 3]===
:'''Winter''': Beacon, it's been a long time. The air feels, different.
:'''Ruby''': I mean it is fall so it's probably colder...
''[Weiss punch Ruby on her right shoulder]''
:'''Ruby''': Ahh!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winter''': ''[sigh]'' How have you been!
:'''Weiss''': - Oh, splendid! Thank you for asking. I'm actually in the very top ranking of our sparring class. The rest of my studies are going wonderful too. I'm-
''[Winter slap Weiss on the head]''
:'''Winter''': Silence, you boob! I don't recall asking about ranking. I asked how you've been. Are you eating properly? Have you taken up any hobbies? Are you making new friends?
:'''Weiss''': Well, there's Ruby.
:'''Ruby''': ''[Snorts]'' Boob. ''[After fixing a bump on Weiss's head]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qrow''': Hey, ''[Weiss and Winter turn around]'' yeah! I talking to you, Ice Queen.
:'''Winter''': Halt!
:'''Weiss''': Excuse me? ''[Walking toward Qrow]'' Do you have any idea who you talking to?
:'''Qrow''': ''[Holds Weiss head]'' Sssshhhh, Not you. ''[Pushes Weiss away]''
:'''Weiss''': Hey!
:'''Qrow''': ''[Walking toward Winter]'' YOU.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': What's going on?!
:'''Weiss''': Some crazy guy just started attacking my sister!
:'''Ruby''': Oh, no! Who would do such a th-aaaaat is my uncle!
:'''Weiss''': What?!
:'''Ruby''': Kick her butt, Uncle Qrow!
:'''Weiss''': Uhh, teach him respect, Winter!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ruby''': UNCLE QROWWWWWWWW! ''[She rushes to him and jumps onto his arm, hanging on]'' Hi...Oh, it's so good to see you! Did you miss me? Did you miss me?!
:'''Qrow''': ''[Smiles and ruffles Ruby's hair]'' Nope.
:'''Ozpin''': Qrow. A word, please.
:'''Qrow''': ''[Aside to Ruby]'' I think I'm in trouble.
:'''Ruby''': Well, you did tear up our courtyard.
:'''Qrow''': Yeah, I did. ''[Winks and bumps fists with Ruby]'' Catch you later, kid. 
''[Qrow leaves with Ozpin while Goodwitch repairs the damage from Qrow's fight with Winter.]''
:'''Weiss''': ''[To Ruby]'' And, suddenly, your recklessness makes sense. 
:'''Ruby''': ''[Elbows Weiss]'' You're just mad, 'cause he whooped butt.
:'''Weiss''': That was a draw, at best!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Winter''': What were you thinking?
:'''Ironwood''': If you were one of my men, I'd have you shot!
:'''Qrow''': If I was one of your men, I'd shoot myself.
:'''Goodwitch''': While I wouldn't condone his behavior, retaliating like you did certainly didn't help the situation.
:'''Winter''': He was drunk!
:'''Goodwitch''': He's ''always'' drunk. ''[They turn and see Qrow drinking from his flask. He sees them staring at him and stops drinking with a shrug]''

===Lessons Learned [Volume 3, Episode 4]===
:'''Coco''': Hey, ''[Lowers her sunglasses]'' Love the outfit, kid.
:'''Emerald''': I'll try not to get blood on it!
:'''Yatsuhashi''': ''[stands up]'' I can't promise you'll leave without a scratch.
:'''Emerald''': ''I'' won't be the one bleeding.
:'''Coco''': Oooh, I like her!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Coco''': ''[After her sunglasses break]'' I take it back; I ''don't' like her.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qrow''': I come across a small village in the swamps West of Mistaral. Right off the bat, I knew something wasn't right. 
:'''Ruby''': What were you doing there?
:'''Qrow''': I needed information. Tired from battling Grimm along the way, I decided to start my search at the town's Inn. The place was crawling with low-lifes and thugs, even a few Huntsmen I could only assume had been hired by less than reputable people for less than respectable jobs. And that's when it happened.
:'''Yang''': What happened?
:'''Qrow''': I was defeated... by the mere sight... of the Inn Keeper's skirt length!
''[Yang throw a pillow at Qrow, after that story and also beating her in the video game]''
:'''Game Announcer''': Soaring Ninja, Wins. Total Annihilation!
:'''Yang''': You are the worst!
''[Qrow and Ruby start to laugh]''
:'''Qrow''': Best two out of three?
:'''Ruby''': So, Uncle Qrow, did you get in trouble with Ozpin?
:'''Qrow''': Nah, me and Oz go way back. We're cool.
:'''Yang''': Tch, cool for a old guy.
:'''Qrow''': Not funny.

===Never Miss a Beat [Volume 3, Episode 5]===
:'''Ruby''': So is she... your friend or... 
:'''Penny''': She's like Blake, but if Blake was ordered to spend time with you. 
:'''Ruby''': Oh. So, Weiss. 
:'''Penny''': Precisely!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[After Flynt Coal blame Weiss, that her father close his father Dust shop]''
:'''Yang''': Hey! Why don't you-
:'''Neon Katt''': Hey! Why don't you... That's what you sound like!
:'''Yang''': Uh...
:'''Neon Katt''': Hey! Where did you get your hair extensions?
:'''Yang''': This is just my normal hair...
:'''Neon Katt''': Ooh! Really?
:'''Yang''': Yeah! Is that a prob-
:'''Neon Katt''': You should try rollerblading sometime. It's suuuper-fun! It probably would take you a while, since you're so, you know...&quot;top-heavy&quot;.
:'''Yang''': ''[Yang looks at her chest]'' EXCUSE ME?
:'''Ruby''': ''[Watching in the stands with Blake, quietly]'' Oh, here we go...
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neon Katt''': ''[After freezing Yang right leg]'' Hmm-mmm, Look! Now you're ''[spanks her butt] &quot;bottom-heavy&quot; too.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neon Katt''': Ooh! Flashy eyes! You know, you're actually look kinda pretty while you're angry.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Neon Katt''': Never miss a beat, never miss a beat, Never... miss a... ''[Trying not to fall, until she trips on a crack in the floor]'' ...beat?
''[Neon starts to roll to a geyser, leaving an opening for Yang, who blasts her]''
:'''Neon Katt''': AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! ''[The blast explodes, and Neon Katt is eliminated]
''[Crowd cheer]''
''[Yang started to breathe for 3 seconds]''
:'''Yang''': ''[After her eyes turn back to normal]'' Weiss! ''[Yang rush to Weiss]'' Weiss! Are you okay?
:'''Weiss''': ''[Coughs]'' I may not be singing for a while...
:'''Yang''': You know...I don't think that was proper form.
:'''Weiss''': Oh ha, ha! ''[coughs]''
:'''Neon Katt''': ''[high pitched]'' WHAT?! We lost?! We lost?! Team FNKI lost?! That was... That was... AMAZING!! Oh my gosh you guys were super crazy awesome! We should DEFINITELY party together sometimes! Right, Flynt?
:'''Flynt Coal''': That was a gutsy move, Schnee...I dig it.
''[Ruby and Blake rush to their teammates]''

:'''Blake''': Good job you two!
:'''Ruby''': Yeah!
===Fall [Volume 3, Episode 6]===
''[After Yang defeats Mercury]''
:'''Ruby''': Yeah! You did it, sis!
:'''Blake''': Way a go, Yang!
:'''Yang''': Better luck next time.
:'''Mercury''': ''[suddenly menacing]'' There's not going to ''be'' a next time, Blondie!

===Beginning of the End [Volume 3, Episode 7]===
:'''Mercury''': Oh, Doc! Tell me! Will I ever walk again? ''[Emerald hits Mercury]'' Ow! What's your deal?
:'''Emerald''': Ugh, headache. One mind I can handle, but two is a stretch.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Emerald turns off the TV]''
:'''Mercury''': Hey, I was watching that!
:'''Emerald''': Shut up!
:'''Mercury''': Is this how you treat a patient? ''[Emerald twists a screwdriver on Mercury robotic leg]'' Ow! Too tight!
:'''Cinder''': Enough. Our Mercury put on a wonderful show. He was quite brave.
:'''Mercury''': These things aren't exactly cheap ya know.

===Destiny [Volume 3, Episode 8]===
:'''Nora''': You heard the lady! No more moping around! ''[Changes into a workout attire]'' We gotta get your butt in shape for the big fight! It could be today! It could be tomorrow! It could be ''[while lifting 1000 LB weights]'' the most important fight of your entire life! ''[Then falls down]''
:'''Pyrrha''': Um...
:'''Ren''': Nora's right. ''[Wearing an apron that says &quot;Please do nothing to the cook&quot;]'' You can't let your concern for Yang hold you back. You need to focus. You'll be defending the honor of Beacon Academy.
:'''Pyrrha''': Of course. I-
:'''Ren''': ''[Giving Pyrrha a cup of what appears to be green sludge]'' This blend of herbs and vegetables is filled with nutrients vital to your body's well being.
:'''Pyrrha''': Oh... that's-
:'''Ren''': Please, there's no need to thank me.
:'''Nora''': Thank you?! Ugh, that looks like slime from a lake-bed!
:'''Ren''': Algae contains numerous spectacular properties. See for yourself.
''[Nora starts to drink Ren's special shake, her face turn green]''
:'''Nora''': Ugh! ''[rush to the trash can and vomits, while Pyrrha grins]'' What is wrong with you?
:'''Ren''': Me? You're the one that wasted perfectly good juice.
:'''Nora''': We're supposed to help Pyrrha, not poison her!
:'''Ren''': There was absolutely nothing wrong with that.
:'''Nora''': If it looks the same coming up as it does going down, then there's something wrong!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Qrow''': Hey there, fire-cracker.
:'''Yang''': Hey Qrow...
:'''Qrow''': So why'd you do it?
:'''Yang''': You know why.
:'''Qrow''': All I know is that you attacked a helpless kid. So either you're lying, or you're crazy. 
:'''Yang''': I'm NOT lying.
:'''Qrow''': Hm, crazy. Got it.

===PvP [Volume 3, Episode 9]===
''[All of Remnant has watched Pyrrha accidentally destroy Penny in the Tournament Final, revealing her android nature]''
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': ''[into his earpiece]'' Broadcast, what are you doing?! Kill the feed!
:'''Broadcast''': Something's wrong! We don't have control over the cameras! We can't even shut off the broadcast!
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': What?! How is that even possible?
''[The coverage on-screen is suddenly overcast with the image of a black Chess Queen, illuminated in red.]
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[over the speakers]'' This... is ''not'' a tragedy. This... was ''not'' an accident. This is what happens, when you sacrifice your trust- your safety- your ''children''- to men who claim to be our guardians.
''[As the audience reacts with increasing surprise, anger and fear, Cinder is shown standing atop Beacon Academy, speaking into her Scroll]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': But are, in reality... nothing more than ''men.'' Our Academies' Headmasters wield more power than most armies, and one was audacious enough to control ''both.'' They cling to this power in the name of peace, and yet, what do we have to show for it? One nation's attempt a synthetic army, mercilessly torn apart by another's star pupil. What need would ''Atlas'' have, for a soldier disguised as an innocent little girl? I don't think the ''Grimm'' can tell the difference.
''[In the stands, Ironwood angrily leaves his seat, while Pyrrha stares tearfully at Penny's remains. At the food stands, Weiss looks sad, while Blake looks angry; in the dorms, Yang grips the windowsill, looking worried.]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': And what, may I ask you, is Ozpin teaching ''his'' students? First a dismemberment, now this?! Huntsmen and Huntresses should carry themselves with honor and mercy, yet I have witnessed neither. Perhaps Ozpin felt as though defeating Atlas in the tournament, would help people forget his ''collossal'' failure to protect Vale, when the Grimm invaded its' streets. Or perhaps... this was his message, to the tyrannical dictator, that has occupied an unsuspecting kingdom with armed forces.
''[Ozpin watches from his office in Beacon Tower]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': Honestly? I haven't the slightest clue as to who is right and who is wrong. But I know that the existence of peace, is fragile... and the leaders of our Kingdoms, conduct their business with ''iron gloves''.
''[Emerald discreetly ducks out of the stands]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': As someone who hails from Mistral, I can assure you... the situation there is... ''equally'' undesireable. Our Kingdoms are at the brink of war, yet we, the citizens, are kept in the dark!
''[Drawn by the magnified negative emotions, hordes of Grimm begin to charge out of the fog near Vale; the Atlesian guards fire on them]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': So, I ask you... when the first shots are fired... who do ''you'' think you can trust?
''[The screens go dark]''
:'''Bartholomew Oobleck''': The feeds are all jammed! We can't get a message out!
:'''Peter Port''': Will ''somebody'' tell me what in the world is happening?!
''[An alarm siren begins to wail]''
:'''Automated Voice''': ALERT: INCOMING GRIMM ATTACK. THREAT LEVEL: 9. PLEASE SEEK SHELTER IN A CALM AND ORDERLY MANNER. 
''[The audience begins to panic and flee the stands. Ironwood bursts into the announcer's booth and grabs the microphone.]''
:'''James Ironwood''': Ladies and gentlemen, ''please'', there is no need for panic-
''[He is interrupted by a loud screech as a giant flying Grimm slams into the Dust shield atop the Colosseum.]''  
:'''Sun Wukong''': A Nevermore?!
:'''Coco Adel''': How'd it get past the Kingdom's defenses?!
:'''Lie Ren''': ''[grimly]'' It wasn't ''alone.''
''[As Oz grabs his cane, Glynda and Qrow burst into his office]''
:'''Qrow Branwen''': Oz-
:'''Professor Ozpin''': Get to the city!
:'''Qrow Branwen''': But-
:'''Professor Ozpin''': ''Now!''
''[He calls Ironwood's scroll, as more Grimm are shown stirring in Mountain Glenn]''
:'''James Ironwood''': Ozpin! The girl, I- I can explain-
:'''Professor Ozpin''': ''[sharply]'' You brought ''your'' Army to my Kingdom, James. ''Use it!''
----
:'''Atlesian Commander''': Dammit! ''[into his Scroll]'' This is Blue Four. Blues Two and Three, fall into defensive position!
:'''Atlesian Officer''': Roger! Blue Three, in position!
:'''Atlesian Commander''': Blue Two, what's your status?!
''[The bridge of Blue Two is shown full of sparking screens and dead Atlesians; an unseen officer walks past them, shown only below the waist, as alarms blare]''
:'''Atlesian Commander''': Blue Two, ''come in!'' Someone answer me, dammit!
''[The officer enters the ship's brig carrying an ornate parasol, revealed to be Neopolitan. Smirking, she opens one of the cells, twirling a familiar-looking bowler hat and cane in her other hand...]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[leans forward, grinning]'' Well... it's about ''time''.
''[Blue Two suddenly turns and fires its' cannons into Blue Four, sending it careening into Blue Three]''
:'''Atlesian Commander''': ''We're hit!'' What's going- ''[he is cut off by explosions as both ships crash into a cliff. Roman and Neo are shown standing on the bridge of Blue Two]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[laughs maniacally]'' Oh, it is ''good'' to be back!

===Battle of Beacon [Volume 3, Episode 10]===

''[After defeating the Nevermore]''
:'''Pyrrha''': Ruby... ''[In tears]'' I am ''so'' sorry!
:'''Ruby''': Me too... But it wasn't your fault.
:'''Jaune''': She's right. ''[Jaune bring Pyrrha's weapon to her]'' Whoever was on the microphone- they're the one that did this! And we have to make sure they don't take anyone else.
----
''[As Ironwood finishes killing a Beowulf Alpha, Ruby and her friends emerge from the Colosseum]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': What's going on?!
:'''James Ironwood''': Grimm are crawling all over the city. The White Fang has invaded Beacon, and to make matters worse, some... vagabond, has seized one of my ships. Until we regain command, the skies are out of our control. So I'm-
''[He raises his pistol, shooting down a Creep approaching the students from behind]''
:'''James Ironwood''': -Going to take it ''back.'' ''[moves to board his airship]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': What should ''we'' do?
:'''James Ironwood''': You have two choices. Defend your Kingdom, and your school... or save yourselves.
''[The students glance at each other]''
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[reassuringly]'' No one will fault you, if you leave. ''[to his android soldiers]'' Let's move out!
''[As his ship flies away, the students look at each other again]''
:'''Sun Wukong''': I mean... come on!

===Heroes and Monsters [Volume 3, Episode 11]===
''[As Ruby battles Neopolitan atop the Atlesian airship, Roman arrives and fires at her, knocking her across the deck; he approaches and leans over her]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[mockingly]'' Little Red, little Red.   You are just ''determined'' to be the hero of Vale, aren't'cha?
:'''Ruby Rose''': What are you doing?!  Without these ships, the Grimm will destroy everything!
:'''Roman Torchwick''': That's the plan! 
''[he aims Melodic Cudgel, but she knocks it sideways as he fires. Springing up, she dodges Neo's attack, staggers to the edge of the ship, then jumps back as a Nevermore swoops past.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': But why?  What do you ''get'' out of it?!
:'''Roman Torchwick''': You're asking the wrong questions, Red. It's not what I have to ''gain'', it's that I can't afford to ''lose!''
''[Ruby charges him, but Roman ducks as Neo vaults over his shoulder, forcing Ruby back. As Ruby slashes, Neo hooks Crescent Rose from her grip with Hush and spin-kicks her in the side. Roman ricochets Melodic Cudgel at Ruby, catches it and fires over his shoulder, blasting her off the ship; she catches onto Crescent Rose, embedded in its' side. She kicks at a Griffon that approaches her]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': I maybe a gambling man, but even ''I'' know there are some bets you ''just don't take.''
''[Neo extends Hush's rapier blade and drags it across the deck, throwing up sparks. As she approaches, Ruby notices a button on the parasol's handle]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': Like it or not, the people who hired me are going to change the world!  You can't stop 'em, ''I'' can't stop em, and you know the old saying. &quot;If you can't beat 'em-&quot; 
''[Ruby lunges up and presses Hush's button, causing it to open, catch the wind, yank a shocked Neo off the ship and sweep her away]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[horrified] NEO!''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[climbing back up]'' I don't care what you say! We ''will'' stop them, and ''I'' will stop you! BET ON THAT!
''[As she speeds forward, Roman fires another Dust flare, scattering it with Melodic Cudgel's hook. As Ruby is thrown backward, he cane-clubs her, then fires again at point-blank range, knocking her down]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': ''[Angrily, as he advances]'' You got spirit, kid. But this, is the ''REAL WORLD! [he clubs her again]'' The real world is ''COLD! [clubs her again]'' The ''real'' world, doesn't ''CARE'' about spirit! 
''[Ruby kicks him in the shin, and he jumps back, growling]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': You want to be a hero?! Then play the part, and ''DIE'' like every other Huntsman in history! [''He clubs her back down as she rises, not noticing that several Grimm are circling above them, drawn by his negative emotions]'' As for ''me'', I'll do what I do best: lie, steal, cheat... and ''SURVIVE!''
''[As he raises Melodic Cudgel again, a Griffon suddenly swoops down, seizes him in its' jaws, and devours him whole]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Blake has been knocked down while fighting Adam during the Battle of Beacon Academy]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': This could have been ''OUR'' day! Can't you see that?!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I never wanted ''this!'' I wanted equality- I wanted ''peace!''
''[She rises into a kneeling position and fires Gambol Shroud's pistol at Adam, but he blocks the shots with Wilt's blade, absorbing their energy]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': What you ''want'' is IMPOSSIBLE! ''[he backhands her across the face, knocking her down]'' But I understand. Because all I want... is ''you'', Blake. 
''[Blake raises her gun again, but Adam kicks it from her hand.]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': And, as I set out upon this world, to deliver the ''justice'' mankind so greatly deserves...''[crouches and gestures in her face]'' I will make it my mission, to destroy ''everything'' you love. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[nearby]'' Blake! Blake, where are you?!
''[Yang comes into view outside the broken window, decking a White Fang member. Adam quickly glances from her, to Blake's horrified expression]''
:'''Adam Taurus''': ...Starting with ''her''.

===End of the Beginning [Volume 3, Episode 12]===
''[After a prolonged battle, Cinder has disarmed Pyrrha, broken her Aura, and crippled her with an arrow through her heel. Circling her victim, she approaches, lifting her chin]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[smugly]'' It's a shame you were promised a power, that was ''never'' truly yours. But, take comfort in knowing, that ''I'' will use it, in ways you could never ''imagine.''
:'''Pyrrha Nikos''': ''[pulls away from Cinder's grip, glaring at her]'' ...Do you believe in destiny?
''[Cinder's smile fades as she steps back, conjuring an obsidian bow and arrow with her Semblance]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ...''Yes.''
''[Just as Ruby reaches the top of the tower, Cinder fires her arrow into Pyrrha's chest. As Pyrrha convulses, Cinder approaches and touches her head, incinerating her with her Semblance until all that remains is Pyrrha's circlet, which she drops on the ground. Ruby watches this with an expression of horror and rage.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': '''PYRRHA!!!!!''' ''[A burst of white light shoots out of her eyes, causing the Grimm Dragon to screech in agony and freeze]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': WHAT?! ''[The light engulfs her as well]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Ruby awakens in her home at Patch, with her father sitting next to her bed, asleep. She groans as she sits up, awakening him]''
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': Ruby! ''[He moves next to her]'' You're awake!
:'''Ruby Rose''': What... happened?
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': ''[sighs]'' Your uncle Qrow found you, unconscious. He got you out of there, though, he brought you home safe.
:'''Ruby Rose''':... Wait! Yang! Is she alright?!
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': ''[his face falls]'' Uh...She's, uh... she's gonna be alright. I think she's just... I think it's just gonna take some time, for her to get used to things. ''[Ruby looks down, sadly]'' She's too strong, to let this stop her. ''[wipes his eyes and smiles]'' I'm just glad to have my girls back at home.
:'''Ruby Rose''': What happened to the school? And Vale! Were they able to clear out the Grimm?
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': Things at ''Vale'' are under control. But, the school? It's... it's not that simple. That thing, whatever it is, doesn't seem to be dead. Don't get me wrong, you... did a ''number'' on it...But, it's not disappearing. It's... kind of... ''frozen''. I know that doesn't sound too bad, but it keeps attracting more Grimm to the school.
:'''Ruby Rose''':... I did ''what?''
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': Hmmm?
:'''Ruby Rose''': You said, I did a number on it. What do you mean?
:'''Tiaying Xiao Long''': I... look, that's not important right now, we can talk about it later. Things are just... kind of a mess.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[from the doorway]'' It's ''always'' a mess. ''[swigs the last contents of his hip flask]'' Mind if we have a minute?
:'''Tiayang Xiao Long''': What, I can't stay here?
:'''Qrow Branwen''': Tai, please.
''[Taiyang sighs, leans over and kisses Ruby's forehead]''
:'''Taiyang Xiao Long''': I'm glad you're alright. I'll go make us some tea.
''[Tai leaves, shooting Qrow a dark look as he passes. Qrow drags a chair over and sits next to Ruby.]''
:'''Qrow Branwen''': So... how you feeling?
:'''Ruby Rose''': Um... I, kind of hurt... all over.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[chuckles, folds his arms]'' That makes sense, after what you did.
:'''Ruby Rose''': You guys keep saying that! That I ''did'' something. What are you talking about?!
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[leans forward]'' What's the last thing you remember?
:'''Ruby Rose''':... I ran up the side of the Tower. And when I got to the top, I- ''[gasps in horror]'' Pyrrha! Is she-
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[nods, softly]'' ...She's gone. ''[Ruby looks away]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tearfully]'' I... I got to the top, and I saw Pyrrha... ''[clenching her fists]'' And ''Cinder.'' And then, everything went white!
:'''Qrow Branwen''':... Anything else?
:'''Ruby Rose''': I remember... my head hurting.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': The night you met Ozpin... what was the first thing, he said to you?
:'''Ruby Rose''': I... I don't know. I think it was something about-
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''Silver eyes. [Ruby looks up]'' That's an ''extremely'' rare trait.
:'''Ruby Rose''': So?
:'''Qrow Branwen''':... You're special, Ruby. And ''not'' in the 'Daddy loves his special angel' kind of way. You're special the same way your ''Mom'' was. Remnant's full of legends and stories. Some of 'em true, some made up. But there's one Oz told me, from a very long time ago. Back before Huntsmen, before ''Kingdoms''. It was said that those with silver eyes, were destined to lead the life of a warrior. You see, the creatures of Grimm- the most fearsome monsters mankind had ever encountered- were ''afraid'', of those silver-eyed warriors. They were the best of the best. It was said that even a single ''look'' from one of these fighters, could strike a Grimm down. ''[smiles]'' It's a ridiculous story... 
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... you think that, I might be...
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[chuckles]'' Well, a giant monster's currently ''frozen'' on top of Beacon Tower... and ''you're'' here, safe in bed. ''[stands up, looks out the window]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Wait... Wait, how did ''you'' know what Ozpin said to me? The night we met.
:'''Qrow Branwen''': All those missions I go on, all those times I'm away, in some far-off place... It's been for Ozpin. But he's missing, now. Something's been set in motion... and with Oz gone, I'll have to pick up, where he left off.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Then what can ''I'' do? ''[Qrow turns back to her]'' If I'm so special, then I can help, right?
:'''Qrow Branwen''': ''[sighs]'' You really wanna help? Get some rest. You're in no condition to go anywhere, right now. ''[moves to the door, turns back briefly]'' Besides... our enemy's trail leads all the way, to ''Haven''. That'd be quite a trip for a pipsqueak like you. ''[winks at her as he leaves]'' Catch ya later, kiddo.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[Yang is sitting in her bed staring out the window. Ruby quietly enters.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tentatively]'' Yang? ''[When Yang doesn't respond, she starts to leave]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...Ruby.
''[Ruby turn around to see Yang looking at her, eyes full of tears. She runs over and hugs her sister]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': I'm so glad you're okay!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...But I'm ''not''. ''[Ruby lets go, staring at the bandaged stump of Yang's arm]'' It's all ''gone. [her voice starts to break]'' The school...Penny... ''Pyrrha''... and... 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Yang, where are Weiss and Blake?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Weiss's father... came for her.
:'''Ruby Rose''': What?! What do you mean?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No one outside of Vale knows what happened here. Before the tower fell... The last thing people saw was Atlas attacking innocent people, and Grimm destroying the city. Everyone's scared. No one knows who to trust. So Weiss's father came to take her back to Atlas, where he ''thinks'' it's safe. She's gone.
:'''Ruby Rose''': What about-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': And ''Blake'' ran! ''[bitterly]'' Sun saw her go. After we got to the city... she just... ''ran!''
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... ''why?''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I don't know. ''[tears up, then turns away]'' And I don't ''care''.
:'''Ruby Rose''': There have to be a reason she-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No there ''doesn't!'' Sometimes bad things just happen, Ruby!
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[softly]'' ...So what do we do, now?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[coldly]'' You can do what you like. I'm gonna lie here.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Yang-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Just leave me alone.
''[Ruby goes to the door, turning back briefly]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[softly]'' I love you.
''[She leaves when Yang does not respond]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
''[As winter arrives, Ruby steps outside her house]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ...Hey.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Hey Jaune. ''[she approaches him]'' Haven's a long way to go.
:'''Jaune Arc''': I know. But it's the only lead we have.
:'''Ruby Rose''': And you're ''sure'' you wanna come along?
:'''Lie Ren''': The journey will be perilous... and whether we'll find answers at the end, is entirely uncertain.
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': But we wouldn't be here if we weren't up for it.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Then let's get started.
''[The four friends set off on the road for Haven]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': &quot;A smaller, more honest soul.&quot; It's true that a simple spark, can ignite hope. Breath ''fire'', into the hearts of the weary.
''[At home, Taiyang brings Ruby's breakfast, only to find a note. He drops the food and runs past Yang's room, where she is still staring out the window]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': The ability to derive strength from ''hope'', is undoubtedly mankind's greatest attribute. Which is why... I will focus ''all'' of my power... to ''snuff it out.''
''[A raven is seen outside Yang's window, watching her before it flies away]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': How does it feel? ''Knowing'', that ''all'' of your time and effort, has been for nothing? That your guardians, have ''failed'' you. That everything you've built, will be ''torn down'', before your very eyes.
''[At the ruins of Beacon Academy, more Grimm are shown approaching the ruined Tower and the petrified dragon atop it.]''
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': Your faith in mankind was ''not'' misplaced. When banded together, unified by a common enemy... they ''are'' a noticeable threat. ''[Glynda Goodwitch is shown repairing damage in Vale with her Semblance, visibly exhausted]'' But ''divide'' them... place ''doubt'' into their minds.  
''[Blake is shown fleeing across Beacon's rooftops, glancing back at the Tower and dragon]'' 
:'''Mysterious Narrator''': And any ''Semblance'' of power they once had, will wash away. 
''[Weiss is shown on an airship, looking sad. She glances from the window to her father, who is seated next to her, staring ahead coldly. Ruby and her friends are shown visiting her mother's grave before they move on]''
:'''Mysterious narrator''': Of course, they won't realize it at first. Like you, they'll ''cling'' to their fleeting hope, their aspirations. But this is merely the first move. So, you ''send'' your Guardians, your Huntsmen and Huntresses.
''[The scene shifts to the Land of Darkness. The camera zooms toward the Narrator on a cliff, revealing her as Salem]''
:'''Salem''': And when ''they'' fail, and you turn to your ''smaller soul''... know that you send her, to the same, ''pitiful'' demise. This is the beginning of the ''end'', Ozpin. ''[she turns around, her eyes glowing red]'' And I can't wait, to ''watch you burn.''

== Volume 4 ==

===The Next Step [Volume 4, Episode 1]===

:''[Cinder speaks in unintelligible, hoarse whispers to Emerald]''

:'''Dr. Watts''': Pathetic. Why'd you even-?

:''[The door opens. Watts, Cinder, Hazel, and Tyrian all stand. Salem enters, moves to the head of the table, and turns to face them]''
:'''Salem''': Watts...Do you find such malignancy necessary? ''[She gestures for them to sit.]''
:'''Dr. Watts''': I apologize, ma'am. I'm not particularly fond of failure.
:'''Salem''': ''[sits]'' Then I see no reason for your cruelty towards young Cinder. She's become our Fall Maiden, destroyed Beacon Tower, and most importantly...killed dear Ozpin. So, I'm curious; to what failures are you referring?
:'''Dr. Watts''': Well, the girl with silver eyes.
:'''Hazel''': Yes. We dealt with her kind before. How's it a novice was able to best one of us?
:'''Dr. Watts''': My thoughts exactly. Even without her new power, it should've been effortless.
:'''Salem''': It is ''because'' of the Maiden's power. Make no mistake, Cinder, you hold the key to our victory. But, your newfound strength brings with it a crippling weakness. Which is why you will remain by my side as we continue your treatment. ''[Cinder snarls in disappointment]'' Dr. Watts, you are to take Cinder's place, and meet with our informant in Mistral. 
:'''Dr. Watts''': Very good.
:'''Salem''': Tyrian, I want you to continue your hunt for the Spring Maiden. 
:'''Tyrian''': ''[Gives a gleeful chuckle]'' Gladly.
:'''Salem''': And Hazel, I'm sending you to the leader of the White Fang. Adam Taurus has arranged the meeting. The boy continues to prove loyal. Ensure that Sienna Khan feels the same way. 
:'''Hazel''': As you wish. 
:''[Cinder raises her hand, and looks at Emerald]''
:'''Emerald''': Oh. ''[Leans in to Cinder. Cinder whispers to her again, and Emerald stands up]''
:'''Salem''': Speak, child.
:'''Emerald''': She wants to know...&quot;What about the girl?&quot;
:'''Dr. Watts''': ''[Scoffs]'' What about her? Seems to me that this is Cinder's problem, not ours. 
''[Cinder slams her fist on the table and glares at Watts, who smirks]''
:'''Salem''': That's enough. Tyrian?
:'''Tyrian''': ''[grins]'' yes, my lady?
:'''Salem''': Spring can wait. Find the girl that did this to Cinder...''[Tyrian gleefully giggles and claps]'' And bring her to me. ''[Tyrian frowns in disappointment]'' Because of your efforts, Beacon has fallen...and 'Haven'', will be next. 
:'''Tyrian''': ''[gesturns to Cinder]'' And eye for an eye...
''[he dissolves into a fit of maniacal laughter]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nora''': I'm just saying, there's more members of JNPR on this team than RWBY. It just makes sense to go with ''that'' one! 
:'''Ren''': But JNRR isn't a color.
:'''Nora''': ''[Groans]'' How can I be more clear?! ''[Holds her hand up, and an image of JNRR appears]'' One, two, three! That's ''more'' than one!
:'''Ren''': But, we're helping Ruby with her objective. ''[Holds his hand up, and an image of RNJR appears]'' Wouldn't that make her the leader?
:'''Jaune''': ''[On lookout]'' Guys, we need to focus...Also, JNRR is way cooler. 
:'''Nora''': EXACTLY!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Blacksmith finishes creating Jaune new armor]''
:'''Blacksmith''': There you go, son! It's gonna be heavier than you're used to... But you'll thank me the next time you go up against a set of claws! 
:'''Jaune''': Wow... I... I don't know what to say.
:'''Blacksmith''': Don't gotta say anything! Just put it on! I'll go get the rest.
:'''Nora''': So, what are you waiting for?!
:'''Jaune''': Oh...! Right! ''[Removing his old armor]'' Guess I was... Gonna grow out of it eventually...
:'''Ren''': A sign of progress.
:'''Jaune''': Progress. 
''[As Jaune turns around, Ruby gasps, then snickers]''
:'''Jaune''': Whuh... What is it?
:'''Ruby''': ''[Pointing at Jaune's hoodie]'' What is THAT?!
:'''Jaune''': ''[Jaune's hoodie has a picture of a bunny on it]'' What, my hoodie? I've always had this!
:'''Ruby''': ''[Again snickering]'' IT GOT A CUTE LITTLE BUNNY RABBIT! ''[Starting to laugh]''
:'''Jaune''': It's Pumpkin Pete! Y'know from the cereal?
:'''Ruby''': ''[Continue to laugh]'' What did you do?! Send in a boxtop for a prize?!  
:'''Jaune''': Yeah! 50!
''[Ruby, after a pause, laughs even louder, before falling over.]''
:'''Ruby''': Ah... Ha-ha-ha... Heh...
:'''Ren''': Well... I suppose we don't have to grow out of everything.
===Remembrance [Volume 4, Chapter 2]===
:'''Ruby''': So, the next town is... ''[continues looking at the map]'' Uh-huh! Uh-huh... ''[stops looking at the map]'' We're lost.
:'''Jaune''': We're not lost! The next town is Shion. My family used to visit it all the time.
:'''Ruby''': Oh, yeah! Don't you have, like four sisters?
:'''Jaune''': Uh, seven.
''[Ruby giggles]''
:'''Nora''': Y'know, that actually explain a lot.
:'''Jaune''': Wait, what do you mean--
:'''Ruby''': SO, what did you guys do there?
:'''Jaune''': OH! All sorts of stuff! Over here is a great hiking trail, and over here is where we went to camping all the time! I got my own tent because I was special. Also, so my sisters would stop braiding my hair.
:'''Ruby''': Didn't like the look?
:'''Jaune''': Yeah, they just keep doing pigtails, but personally I think I'm more of a &quot;Warrior's Wolf Tail&quot; kind of guy. 
:'''Ruby''': That's just a ponytail.
:'''Jaune''': I stand by what I said.
===Of Runaways and Stowaways [Volume 4, Chapter 3]===
:''[Blake tries to defend the ship from a Grimm sea monster. A cloaked figure suddenly rushes past her and leaps at the monster. The cloak flies off, revealing...]''
:'''Blake''': SUN?!
:'''Sun''': ''[Uses his Semblance to help grab the monster's head, as he tries to corral it, keeping the monster from firing on the ship]'' Not today, pal!
:'''Blake''': What are you doing?!
:'''Sun''': ''[As the monster starts flying in random directions, trying to throw him off]'' Oh, just...you know...hanging out! ''[The monster finally throws him off. As Sun starts to fall, Blake swings herself off the ship and catches him, landing on a small island, holding Sun in her arms]'' My hero.
:'''Blake''': You're not supposed to be here!
:'''Sun''': Yeah? Well, it looks like you need all the help you can get.
:'''Blake''': UGH! ''[Drops Sun unceremoniously]'' Just shut up and fight!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sun''': ''[After the Grimm monster is defeated, some Faunus passengers thank him]'' Seriously, it was no big deal. Just enjoy the rest of your trip, and everything will be cool. We got this! ''[Turns back to Blake]'' You'd think they've never seen a fight before.
:'''Blake''': What are you even doing here, Sun?
:'''Sun''': Digging the new outfit, by the way. ''[Points to her cat ears]'' Never did like the bow. 
:'''Blake''': ''[Slaps Sun's hand away]'' SUN!
:'''Sun''': Jeez.
:'''Blake''': Have you been following me?!
:'''Sun''': ''[Sighs]'' I saw you run off. The night Beacon Tower fell. Once we landed in Vale, you made sure everyone was okay, then you just took off, without saying anything. 
:'''Blake''': I had to. You wouldn't understand.
:'''Sun''': No, I get it. The moment you left, I knew exactly what you were doing: You're going on a one-woman rampage against the White Fang!
:'''Blake''': ...WHAT?
:'''Sun''': You always felt like the Fang was your fight. They show up, trash your school, hurt your friends; it makes perfect sense. 
:'''Blake''': I can't believe you. 
:'''Sun''': So, there's no way I'm letting you do this alone! It's an honorable approach for sure, but you're going to need someone watching your back, and that's where I come in! Us Faunus got to stick together, after all. 
:'''Blake''': ''[Shoves Sun away]'' You're wrong, Sun. You're so, so wrong. 
:'''Sun''': What do you-?
:'''Blake''': I'm not going anywhere near the White Fang. Not yet. 
:'''Sun''': Seriously?
:'''Blake''': I need to sort some things out. 
:'''Sun''': Then, why not do it with your team, your friends?
:'''Blake''': You're one to talk! Assuming Neptune, Sage, and Scarlet aren't hiding below deck.
:'''Sun''': You ''really'' think I can get Neptune on the ocean?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Salem''': Cinder, I'm going to ask you this just one more time, and I expect a clear answer. Did you...kill...Ozpin? ''[Cinder starts to raise her hand for Emerald] NO!'' I want to hear ''you'' say it. 
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[Gives a rasping inhale, then, with great effort]'' ...Yes.
:'''Salem''': ''[After a pause, turns to the Grimm orb floating next to her]'' Reinforce our forces at Beacon. The relic ''is'' there. ''[After the orb leaves, she ponders to herself]'' What are you planning?

===Family [Volume 4, Episode 4]===
:'''Taiyang''': Adult or not, you still have a long way to go before you're ready for the real world.
:'''Yang''': ''[Annoyed]'' Oh my gosh, does ''every'' father figure just have the same three condescending phrases?
:'''Taiyang''': Yeah, but we only use them when we mean it!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Prof. Port''': Fear is like any other emotion; it comes and goes. It's all in how we handle it. Why, even I wrestle with that emotion from time to time.
:'''Yang''': Really? You?
:'''Dr. Oobleck''': ''[Aside to Yang]'' He's afraid of mice.
:'''Prof. Port''': THEY ONLY BRING DISEASE AND FAMINE! ''[Yang starts quietly laughing]'' And don't even get me started on their tail! So hairless, it's simply unnatural!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Raven''': Hello, brother.
:'''Qrow''': ...Raven. ''[Goes to the table she's sitting at. He gives her a look, and after a pause, Raven pulls her mask aside, allowing him to sit with his drink.]'' So, what do you want?
:'''Raven''': A girl can't just catch up with her family?
:'''Qrow''': She can, but you're not. Now, how about we get on with it? ''[Takes a sip of his drink]'' Unless you plan on keeping these coming.
:'''Raven''': Does she have it?
:'''Qrow''': ...Did you know Yang lost her arm?
:'''Raven''': That's not-
:'''Qrow''': Rhetorical question, I know you know. It's just obnoxious that you bring up family, then just carry on like your own daughter doesn't exist. 
:'''Raven''': I saved her!
:'''Qrow''': Once, because that was your rule, right? Real &quot;Mom of the Year&quot; material, sis.

== Volume 5 ==
 
===Dread In The Air [Volume 5, Episode 2]===
:'''Dr. Watts''': I'm still so fascinated by this creature.  Cinder, dear, are we coming through?  Can you see us clearly?  Well, as clearly as you can.
:'''Cinder''': Shut... up!
:'''Dr. Watts''': Oh, goody.  You've recovered.

===Lighting the Fire [Volume 5, Episode 4]===
''[Yang is brought into the Branwen tribe camp, waiting in front of the main tent under guard as a masked Raven cautiously exits]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Mom.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[Removes her mask and sets it aside]'' Yang... So,  after all this time, you've finally decided to visit me.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Reaches down and holds her shaking hand]'' You ''know'' that I searched for you. I spent years looking for you.
:'''Raven Branwen''': And you found me. You were patient, determined, and strong enough to make your dream a reality. ''[Smiles]'' Well done, Yang. But did you have to be so rough with my men?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I didn't want a fight. ''They'' started it. ''[Crosses her arms]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': Well, you certainly ''finished'' it.
''[Yang simply gives an unamused stare back at Raven.]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': Right... I'm sure this is all very overwhelming, but I must admit that you've proven yourself, so any questions you have, I'll be happy to answer. You can stay with us tonight; I'll even have the cooks whip up something for you.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': That's not why I'm here.
''[Raven's friendly facade falls. The bandits gathered around Yang chatter amongst themselves but soon fall quiet when a slight wind gust arrives.]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''What was that?''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I'm not here for ''you''. Ruby is somewhere in Mistral – she's with Qrow and she's going to need my help. I just need ''you'' to take me to her.
:'''Raven Branwen''': And why would I do that?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Sarcastically]'' Because we're family.
:'''Raven Branwen''': Family... only coming around when they need something. ''[moves back toward the tent entrance]'' I have to say, I'm disappointed. After all, you found ''me'' didn't you? Why not take that drive and use it to find your little sister if she really means that much to you?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Because ''you're'' going to save me time. Ruby was heading to Mistral, but there's no guarantee she's made it there. Looking for her in Anima could take ages. But... Dad told me how your Semblance works.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[Surprised, muttering under her breath]'' ''Tai...''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Smirks]'' You could bond to certain people. And when you do, you could create a portal that takes you straight to them. You've got one for Dad, one for me... and you've got one for ''Qrow''. He promised me he'd watch out for Ruby before he left, and I trust him. So, make a portal to my uncle and sister, and I'll be on my way.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ...You know, it takes real strength to march in here and demand such a favor of me; I've got to say, I'm impressed. It's very ''noble'' to want to help out your sister. But if she's with Qrow, then she's already a lost cause. ''[Looks away]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': What does ''that'' mean?
:'''Raven Branwen''': You don't want to get mixed up in all of that, Yang. Ozpin is not the man you think he is, and Qrow is a fool for trusting him. ''[Turns back toward Yang]'' I would know; I trusted him once, too.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I don't care what you think!
''[Vernal watches off to the side of the crowd with Weiss' weapon.]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': Your choice is your own. All I'm suggesting is that instead of getting wrapped up in something too big for you – for ''any'' of us – that maybe you take a moment to wonder if you're already where you belong.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[Steps forward]'' Save your breath. You can spout off whatever you want, but NOTHING is going to keep me from my sister.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[Eyes widen for a moment, before she callously smirks]'' Well, aren't you stubborn?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I get it from my ''mom''.

===Alone Together [Volume 5, Episode 8]===
:'''Yang''': I know she's our teammate. But I'm not just going to change my mind. I'm sorry. I just...I don't think you know what it's like to be left. You have a giant family. Recitals to perform. Dinners to attend. I didn't have any of that. My Mom left me. Ruby's Mom left too. Tai was always busy with school and Ruby couldn't even talk yet. I had to pick up the pieces. I had to keep things together. Alone. Weiss, if you have something to say, then say it.
:'''Weiss''': When I was ten, my Dad finally admitted to my Mom that the only reason he married her was for the family name. It was actually on my birthday. He missed the big dinner, she got mad, he finally snapped. I think she already knew. Looking back, I think I knew too. But hearing him say it finally pushed her over the edge. First it was separate lunches and dinners. Opposite balconies at my recitals. A glass of wine here, a glass of wine there. Then, it was no dinners. No recitals. A bottle of wine here...you get the idea.
:'''Yang''': I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed.
:'''Weiss''': You're right, though. I don't know loneliness like you do. I have my own version.  And I'll bet Blake has her own version too.
:'''Yang''': She doesn't have to be alone. I was here for her! We all were! She chose to leave us!
:'''Weiss''': Why do you think she did that? The entire time Blake was at Beacon, she was afraid to open up to people. She tried to keep her past separate from us. She tried to protect us. Eventually those walls she put up came down. And the moment they did, the one thing she was afraid of actually happened. The universe proved her right.
:'''Yang''': No one blamed her for anything! If she'd just talked us she would've known that! How can I be there for her if she won't let me? What if I need her here for me?

===Vault of the Spring Maiden [Volume 5, Episode 12]===
''[As Vernal, Cinder and Raven enter the Vault, blossoms from its' tree begin to float down around them]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': Having fun?
:'''Raven Branwen''': Vernal, stay focused.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Oh, come now, Raven. Let her enjoy this. It's a once-in-a-lifetime experience.
:'''Vernal''': How does this work?
:'''Cinder Fall''': Once the Spring Maiden places her hand on the door... it will open. For you... and ''only'' you.  Then ''I'' will walk into the Vault, and retrieve the Relic. No one else. Is that ''clear?''
:'''Vernal''': Yes.
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''[impatiently]'' It doesn't matter to us. Let's get this over with.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Alright then. Vernal, when you're ready. ''[Vernal approaches the door; Raven reaches slowly for her sword, but stops when Cinder speaks]'' You know... I've heard ''so'' many stories about you, Raven. They say you're a cunning leader. That you're ''strong''. That you're ''clever. [Vernal reaches for the door as Cinder glances back at Raven]'' It's a ''shame'' that they're wrong. 
''[Cinder suddenly casts a bolt of magic from her hand at Raven]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': ''VERNAL!''
''[She lunges forward, but is encased in ice. Vernal draws her weapons and whirls around, then gasps in pain as she's thrust against the door. She stares down at a Grimm arm stretching from Cinder's crippled shoulder, its' claws impaling her stomach]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[Smiles]'' It's nothing personal, dear. ''[she approaches]'' You're just not ''worthy'' of such power. But ''I'' am. 
''[She throws Vernal to the floor, causing her to scream in agony. Behind them, the ice around Raven starts to crack]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': So, I will ''take''... what is ''mine. [Vernal's struggles weaken, but Cinder's smirk changes to confusion]'' What... what is this? Where's the power?!
''[The ice shatters behind Cinder. She turns to see Raven standing ready, bluish aura flickering around her]''
:'''Raven Branwen''': You won't find it. ''[She pulls off her mask and throws it aside]'' Because Vernal ''isn't'' the Spring Maiden. ''[She raises her face, Maiden flames wreathing her eyes] I'' AM!

== Volume 6 ==

===The Coming Storm [Volume 6, Episode 5]===
:'''Ruby''': Look!  ''[rushes over to a shelf]''
:'''Weiss''': What is it?
:'''Ruby''': ''[shows Weiss canned beans]'' Food!
:'''Weiss''': ''Canned'' food?
:'''Ruby''': Oh, trust me.  You put enough salt on anything and it'll taste just fine.
:'''Weiss''': I suppose it's better than nothing. ''[she and Ruby pick up some cans from the cellar]'' But I still hate this place.
''[They leave, but the door to the nearby wine cellar lifts up and then goes back down again, making an ominous creak.]''
 
===Seeing Red [Volume 6, Episode 12]===
:'''Adam''': You knew you couldn't win two on one at Haven.  What makes you so sure you can win now?
:'''Blake''': I don't have a choice.  I have people who actually care about me!  And I promised that I would never leave them again!  So I'm not dying now!
:'''Adam''': You know, she made a promise to me once... that she'd always be at ''my'' side.  And look how well she's kept it.
:'''Yang''': Did she make that promise to you?  Or to the person you were pretending to be?
:'''Adam''': So I just wasn't good enough for you.
:'''Blake''': You know it's so much more than that.
:'''Adam''': I know you've made your choice.  And I've made mine.

===Our Way [Volume 6, Episode 13]===
:''[In the Land of Darkness, Mercury Black is seen looking out the window in the meeting room. Emerald Sustrai then walks in.]''
:'''Emerald''': Mercury, I wanted to... ''[suddenly, she notices Mercury's face has an expression of horror as he looks out the window. She looks to where he's looking]'' What is she doing?
:''[A Beringel is seen crawling out of one of the black, tar-like pits, with Salem herself standing close by. Having learned about Adam Tarus' death, she then uses her magic as Nevermore wings suddenly sprout from the back of the Beringel. The Beringel gets used to its new appendages, before flying up to join many other Beringels also grafted with wings. Emerald and Mercury continue to watch in horror.]''
:'''Hazel''': There's an old saying. ''[the two notice him enter the room and stands next to them]'' If you want something done right... '''do it yourself.'''
:''[Salem looks up to the army of Grimm she has gathered, before turning around and using her magic on the black pools again, engulfing the entire scene...]''

== Volume 7 ==

===The Greatest Kingdom [Volume 7, Episode 1]===

===A New Approach [Volume 7, Episode 2]===

===Ace Operatives [Volume 7, Episode 3]===

===Pomp And Circumstance [Volume 7, Episode 4]===
:'''Jacques Schnee''': ''[glances at the rest of Team RWBY surrounding Weiss]'' So these are the little friends you threw everything away for?
:'''Weiss''': ''[shakes her head]'' Not friends. ''Family.''

===Sparks [Volume 7, Episode 5]===

===A Night Off [Volume 7, Episode 6]===

===Worst Case Scenario [Volume 7, Episode 7]===

===Cordially Invited [Volume 7, Episode 8]===

===As Above, So Below [Volume 7, Episode 9]===

===Out In The Open [Volume 7, Episode 10]===

===Gravity [Volume 7, Episode 11]===
:'''James Ironwood''': I will sacrifice... ''whatever it takes'', to stop her!
:'''Arthur Watts''': Oh, I hope you ''do'', James. ''[spits blood and smirks]'' I really hope you do.
----
''[A Seer Grimm bursts from Watt's bag, levitating into the air]''
:'''Salem''': General Ironwood.
''[The Seer cracks open, then collapses, dead. Smoke pours out, forming an image of Salem]''
:'''Salem''': The brave Huntsmen and Huntresses ''bested'' Arthur Watts. Congratulations.
:'''Ruby Rose''': We stopped Tyrian, too. And we'll stop Cinder, and anyone else you try to send here.
:'''Salem''': Dear girl, their goal was ''never'' victory. It was merely to set the stage.
:'''James Ironwood''': For what?!
:'''Salem''': ''[Turns]'' ...For ''me. [Ironwood backs away, stunned, as Salem  drifts toward him]'' Time isn't on your side, James. It's ''always'', been on mine. The people of Atlas have suffered enough! Surrender the Staff, and the Lamp, to me... and they needn't suffer any further.
:'''James Ironwood''': That's... ''Not'', going to happen.
:'''Salem''': ''[leans forward, smiling softly]'' Simply accept the futility, of your situation... and this can all be ''over''.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[Firmly]'' We've seen what ''you're'' capable of. The Lamp showed us. ''[Salem's smile vanishes; she straightens, glaring down at Ruby, who stares back defiantly ]'' It showed us ''everything''. We've seen that you can't be killed. But we've also seen you ''fail.'' We don't have to kill you, to stop you... and we ''will'' stop you.
:'''Salem''': ...Your ''mother'', said those words to me.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[stunned, as visions of Summer are shown]'' My... mother?
:'''Salem''': ''She'' was wrong, too.
''[Ruby's silver eyes flash. Still envisioning her mother, she crumples to her knees in tears, clutching her head; Yang rushes to her side. After a moment, Salem disappears.]''
----
:'''Marrow Amin''': ''That's'' Salem?! That's who we're up against?!
:'''Harriet Bree''': And she's apparently on her way.
:'''Elm Elderne''': But... we'd be alerted if any forces had approached the kingdom! We have long-range proximity alarms all along the coast, and-
:'''Vine Zeki''': ''[checks his scroll]'' They're offline. With all of the chaos, we didn't notice.
:'''Marrow Amin''': Watts must have shut them down!
:'''James Ironwood''': Or, they've already been destroyed. ''[walks to his desk and stares out over Atlas Academy]''
:'''Elm Elderne''': What... ''all'' of them?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You said in your speech, that Amity Tower was ready to launch. Was that ''true?'' ''[Ironwood does not answer, Blake and Weiss look at each other]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''No.'' You just ''said'' that, to lure out Watts.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': General... Ironwood?
:'''James Ironwood''':  ...I've sent your sister, to claim the power of the Winter Maiden.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[gasps] What?''
:'''James Ironwood''': When I realized we'd been compromised, I knew we couldn't wait any longer. The Staff and the Lamp, ''have'' to be locked away.
:'''Ruby Rose''': I thought... you said we could keep it.
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[turns, angrily]'' Well, that was before you ''lied'' to me about the Lamp. Before you lied to us about Robyn, before ''Salem'' was right on our doorstep. Before Mantle was nearly ''destroyed'', and myself and my army were left exhausted! ''[he slams Watt's bag off the desk, then sets his gun down and picks up Cinder's chess piece]'' The timeline has changed, and we must change accordingly.
:'''Harriet Bree''': What are our orders, sir?
:'''James Ironwood''': We are going to take our plan for Amity Tower, and apply it to the city of Atlas. ''[crushes the chess piece in his mechanical hand]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[stands up]'' What?!
:'''James Ironwood''': It was Oz's plan, in a former life... but he didn't ''take'' it far enough. If we harness the power of the Staff, and raise ourselves high into the atmosphere, the city's artificial climate will keep citizens and food supplies unharmed. Always out of reach, of whatever Salem may try to send our way.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': But we're ''nowhere'' near finished evacuating everyone! You'd be leaving Mantle to ''die.''
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[coldly]'' Yes... I would. ''[Team RWBY stares at him, stunned]'' ''We can't allow Salem to capture the Relics.'' This is our best chance, at getting the Staff, the Lamp ''and'' the Maiden, as far away from her as possible.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... we have an opportunity to reunite the ''world!'' If we launch the tower, we can all work together again! We could even call for help... If we can hold out long enough-
:'''James Ironwood''': Sometimes, doing the right thing... means making tough decisions.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You're right. And ''I'' think, the right thing to do, would be to ''stand our ground.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Me, too.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Me, too.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Me, too. ''[She glances at the Ace-Ops, but they all look away]''
:'''Harriet Bree''': ...We ran ourselves ragged, trying to save Mantle tonight. We try that again, against an even stronger force-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': But you're Huntsmen and Huntresses! You can't just back down from a fight!
:'''Vine Zeki''': You can't focus on one single fight, while trying to win a war.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': What's the Council going to say?
:'''James Ironwood''': ''Nothing.'' Once I declare martial law.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[horrified] No...''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': What about Robyn?
:'''Elm Elderne''': Who exactly are you ''loyal'' to?
:'''Ruby Rose''': We're loyal to the people, ''counting'' on us to save them!
:'''James Ironwood''': We are saving who we ''can. [Ruby looks back at him]''  And ''you're'' standing in our way.
''[Ruby's scroll suddenly rings]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': It's Jaune! We have got a ''serious'' problem here!
''[Ruby and Ironwood stare each other down. Before Ironwood can move, Ruby flies behind the desk with her Semblance and opens a conference call to Jaune, Qrow and Winter]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Ironwood's declaring martial law, and abandoning Mantle! Salem is coming, and he's going to use the Staff to move Atlas! If we don't stop him, Mantle's going to be des- ''[her call is suddenly cut off by Ironwood]'' What?! No!
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[Walks toward the door]'' I'm sorry it's come to this. But until Atlas and the Relics are safe, you are ''all'' under arrest.
:'''Ruby Rose''': We won't just let you take us.
''[The Ace-Ops form ranks opposite Team RWBY, blocking their way out]''
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[softly]'' I know.
''[He leaves]''

===With Friends Like These [Volume 7, Episode 12]===

===The Enemy of Trust [Volume 7, Episode 13]===
:'''James Ironwood''': Winter. Thank you. I know that must have been difficult. I... I'm so sorry- ''[he turns around and sees Oscar descending into the Vault]'' And... whom do I have the pleasure of speaking with?
:'''Oscar Pine''': Still just me. ''[steps toward him]''
:'''James Ironwood''': It was smart of you not to bring the Lamp, down here. ''I'' wouldn't trust me either, right now.
:'''Oscar Pine''': Trust... is what I'm hoping to fix. I ''know'' we can still figure this out, all of it. Together. ''Please.''
:'''James Ironwood''': ...Do you intend to ''fight'' me?
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[glances at Long Memory]'' No. That's just what she wants. I guess it's because of Oz, but... holding it helps calm me down when I'm afraid. ''[He collapses the cane and clips it to his belt]''
:'''James Ironwood''': You still think ''I'm'' afraid?
:'''Oscar Pine''': We ''all'' are. It's what we ''do'' in our fear, that-
:'''James Ironwood''': THAT'S EASY FOR ''YOU'' TO SAY! You can label me whatever you like, but the fact of the matter is, I was ''RIGHT!'' The ''minute'' I softened, let my guard down, ''that's'' when Salem had her opening.
:'''Oscar Pine''': If you abandon Mantle, you abandon our best chance to reunite the world, you abandon Remnant, leaving ''millions'' to fend for themselves so a few can survive! What kind of-
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[scornfully]'' All ''excellent'' philosophical points, that ''won't matter'', if Salem wins.
:'''Oscar Pine''': Listen to me!
:'''James Ironwood''': No, ''YOU'' listen! ''[He advances aggressively; Oscar steps back, toward the edge of the path]'' I am ''done'', letting others' inability to see the bigger picture, get in the way of doing what's ''right.'' Robyn, the Council, this Kingdom. Even ''you''.
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[sharply]'' Then you're as dangerous as ''she'' is, James.
:'''James Ironwood''': ''[coldly]'' &quot;James&quot;... is what my ''friends'' call me. To you... it's &quot;General.&quot;
''[He draws his pistol and shoots Oscar in the side, knocking him into the abyss]''
-----
''[Ozpin addresses the audience as the final scenes are shown.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': The single quality that is common across every living creature on this planet... is fear. 
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Winter! ''[she rushes to her injured sister's side]''
:'''Winter Schnee''': What... did you ''do?!''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': It's funny, then, that as common as fear is... we so easily underestimate its' power.
''[The Maiden flames in Penny's eyes go out as she checks Fria's pulse. Realizing she's dead, Penny covers her face with her hands]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Are you all right? Penny, what happened?
:'''Penny Polendina''': She's... ''gone.''
:'''Winter Schnee''': No. She's a part of ''you,'' now.
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Fear of growing close to someone.
''[The Atlesian military arrests Robyn and Qrow as he stares mournfully at Clover's blodied badge; Robyn puts her hands on his shoulder.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': A subsequent fear, of loss.
''[Cinder flies away from Atlas Academy, screaming with rage over her defeat by Winter, Penny and Ruby.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Fear of failure.
''[Yang, Blake, Maria and Pietro pick up Team JNPR and fly away]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Where's Oscar? And the Relic? ''[Jaune, Nora and Ren look away]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': And, as more people depend on you... those fears can take on greater power. But, fear itself, isn't worthy of concern. 
''[As he falls below Atlas, Oscar clips Ozpin's cane to his belt.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': It is who we ''become'', while in its' clutches.
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[wincing]'' I suggest you all surrender... and comply with the General's orders.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[sadly]'' ...We can't do that.
:'''Winter Schnee''': Then... I suggest you ''run.''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': No, you're hurt! I'm not going to leave you like this-
:'''Winter Schnee''': You're ''not'' leaving me! ''[softly]'' I'm giving ''you''... a head start. ''[into her earpice]'' This is Special Operative Schnee, in need of immediate medical assistance. Send reinforcements... Over.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ... We all have to carve out our own way.
''[Maria's airship arrives]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Guys! You're- ''[she breaks off when she sees them]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': We need to ''go.''
''[She and Weiss board the airship. After a glance at Winter, Penny follows them]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Will ''you'' be proud, of that person? Will you forgive them?
''[On the airship, Ruby and Weiss both embrace Penny; Pietro smiles proudly as he watches them]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Will you understand, why they felt the need to do the things they did? 
''[On a rooftop in Atlas, Cinder turns to see Neo, who bows and offers the Lamp; Cinder snatches it and brushes past, Neo looking after her with surprise and irritation.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Will you even recognize them?
''[In the Vault of the Winter Maiden, Ironwood receives a text from Winter: IT'S GONE. He lets out a roar of anger.]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''':Or will the person staring back at you be the very thing you should have feared from the start?
''[In an Atlesian cell, Watts notices stormclouds growing on the horizon and smiles menacingly]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': I suppose we all find out, sooner or later.
''[Oscar lets out a cry and conjures a forcefield around himself, cushioning his landing in the crater below Atlas.]''
:'''Oscar Pine''': That power... these memories... you're back, aren't you? You saved me.
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Actually... ''you'', saved us. ''[thunder rumbles]'' Oscar, I-
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''Stop.'' All I want to know, is how we save Atlas next.
''[As the heroes' airship flies away from Atlas, the storm on the horizon intensifies]''
:'''Atlesian soldier #1''': We've got multiple hostiles on radar! Is anyone else seeing this?!
:'''Atlesian Soldier #2''': These readings ''can't'' be right.
''[A dark silhouette emerges from the clouds: a gigantic whale Grimm suspended by Gravity Dust on its' back, with other Grimm flying around it. The camera zooms in to show Salem standing atop its' head, smiling confidently.]''

== Volume 8 ==

===Divide [Volume 8, Episode 1]===
''[Neopolitan and Cinder enter Salem's throne room in Monstra]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[kneels]'' My Queen.
''[Salem rises and turns to face them]''
:'''Salem''': ''...Cinder.'' When I chose you as my vessel for the Maidens, I put my trust in you. So I ''trust'', that you wouldn't ''possibly'' return to me, empty-handed?
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[holds out the Lamp]'' The Relic of Knowledge. I took it right from under Ironwood's nose.
''[Salem stares at the Relic, while Neo shoots Cinder a look of scornful irritation]''
:'''Tyrian Callows''': ''[enters the chamber]'' Outsmarting the General speaks less to ''your'' intellect, and...more to ''his.'' After all, ''you'' were outsmarted by those children, ''first.''
:'''Cinder Fall''': And according to radio chatter, that ''same'' General and his forces, outsmarted ''you''. A shame Watts never made it back.
:'''Tyrian Callows''': I'm afraid the doctor was a ''necessary'' sacrifice. ''[gestures at Neo]'' I do hope ''this'' little one doesn't become another.
''[Neo glares at him as Cinder stands and gives the Lamp to Salem, who watches them curiously.]''
:'''Salem''': ... Who is she?
:'''Cinder Fall''': Neopolitan has some ''very'' useful abilities, and has proven to be a valuable asset. 
''[Neo looks offended]''
:'''Salem''': Hmm. You certainly do enjoy collecting ''assets''.
''[Another door opens, and Hazel, Mercury and Emerald enter. Emerald brightens on seeing Cinder, hurrying forward]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''Cinder.'' You're here! I knew you'd come-
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''Quiet.'' 
''[Emerald stops, looking confused]''
:'''Tyrian Callows''': ''[tsks]'' Mmm- ''So'' devoted, to someone so incompetent. While the good doctor and I were advancing the will of our Goddess, ''dismembering'' the very body of this kingdom... ''you'', were merely atoning for past ''failures.''
:'''Cinder Fall''': Polendina's creation ''interfered'', with the transfer of the Winter Maiden power. But, now I know she ''has'' it, and once I return to Atlas, it won't take long to finish what I started. That power, ''will'' be mine-
''[Salem raises her hand, and Cinder breaks off.]''
:'''Salem''': I've given ''no'' such command. ''[turns back to her throne]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[incredulous]'' Ma'am, now is the time to-
''[Salem touches her throne, sending a pulse of energy through Monstra; the fluid in its' brain clears, revealing Atlas in front of them]''
:'''Salem''': This game, is not yours to win, Cinder. It's ''mine.'' Just because you're more valuable to me than a pawn, does ''not'' make you a player. Everything is already in motion. All you need concern yourself with, is your ability to ''act'', when I tell you to.
:'''Cinder Fall''': ...Of course. ''[bows her head] Without you, I am nothing.''
''[After a pause, Salem waves them away]''
-----
''[Ruby, Weiss and Oscar enter an abandoned bar, where their various allies are watching the news. A TV shows Team RWBY, JNR, Penny, Pietro and Maria as wanted fugitives]''
:'''May Marigold''': I know, Sector Three is going to need the ''most'' help. I'm sending backup your way right now. Fiona, do you copy? We need transport from Sector Three, to the crater.
:'''Fiona Thyme''': ''[over the radio]'' Copy.
''[Nora gets up and approaches Oscar; he braces himself, but is surprised when she hugs him gently]''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': When we heard you went off after Ironwood on your own, we...
:'''Weiss Schnee''': How did you end up down in the slums?
:'''Oscar Pine''': It's, a.. ''[sighs]'' long story. I get the feeling, there's been a ''few'' of those, today. ''[they all glance at Penny]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': ...You're not going to tell them?
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[sharply]'' You and I aren't done ''talkiing'', yet. ''[aloud]'' Where's... Qrow? ''[everyone look away]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ...We don't know. The last we heard, he was with Robyn, but...
''[Joanna reenters]''
:'''Joanna Greenleaf''': Alright, your friend is back now. You ready to work? ''[sighs]'' The largest Grimm horde we've ever seen is hovering over the tundra, and out there is a city full of people with no ''heat'', and from what you've told us, no more military protection. And, while we're happy to give you guys a place to lie low for a while... It's time to get ''those'' people some help.
:'''Lie Ren''': ''How?'' Ironwood is stopping all evacuations to Atlas. And we can't get them out of the city with Salem's forces surrounding us.
:'''Joanna Greenleaf''': The ''crater'', beneath Atlas. It's not ''safe'', but it's warm... and with everyone in one place, we can do a better job protecting them. May can send you where you're needed most. We've got to get everyone down into that crater, before nightfall. In the slums, we ''might'' have a chance.
:'''Weiss Schnee''': ''[deadpan]'' We're never going to sleep again. I just ''know'' it.
:'''Joanna Greenleaf''': ''[sharply]'' Either you're helping... or you're baggage. ''[leaves]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[stands up]''... We need to get out there and do what we can for Mantle.
''[As the characters speak, the scene alternates between their conversation and going about their missions]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': We need to do what we can, for ''everyone.'' What about Amity, and telling the world about Salem? We can't do this ''alone.'' We need ''help.''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Ruby's right. The Happy Huntresses are handling the evacuation better than we could. And there's a ''bigger'' picture.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': But, Amity isn't even ''finished.'' It was still under construction.
:'''Ruby Rose''':... Doctor, what would you need to launch Amity ''now?''
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Uh... we've made decent progress on construction and fuel collection. All potentially manageable, but, uh... Amity was designed so it couldn't launch itself, without first being granted clearance from General Ironwood's terminal.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Ruby, there is ''no way'' Ironwood will cooperate with us!
:'''Ruby Rose''': But... he doesn't ''have'' to. We just need the green light from his terminal, right?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You want to go ''back'' to the Academy?
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Er, actually, there is ''more'' than one terminal. The one in his office, and, uh, one in the main Atlesian military compound... at the base of the city. From there, you have to get into the compound somehow, and, uh, get inside the operations room. And  ''then... Hoo,'' boy. I might need to think about this some more.
:'''Oscar Pine''': And just to clarify: this is the ''easy'' option?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': What you're saying is, it can't be done! It's ''pointless''- and even if you got the message out, there's no guarrantee help would come!
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[whirls around, angrily]'' It's ''not'' pointless! Atlas is only Salem's ''current'' target. She's not hiding anymore, and once she's done here, she'll move on to the rest of Remnant! We ''need'' to warn them!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...Ruby, when we got here, we said we'd follow your lead. But... things haven't exactly worked out. ''[Ruby, Weiss, Nora and Oscar look taken aback]'' I just...
:'''Lie Ren''': ''[steps forward]'' There are people here who need us ''right now.'' That's something we can ''actually'' do.
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': But this ''isn't'' about ''just'' Atlas! Ruby's right. It's about ''all'' of Remnant. They need to know in Vacuo, in Mistral, in ''Vale'', what's ''coming''... so they can prepare!
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[steps between them]'' Okay, okay... then let's go for ''both.'' Get Amity up and running, ''and'' evacuate Mantle.
:'''Ruby Rose''': But that's how Salem got this ''far'', by dividing us! We have to stick together!
:'''Oscar Pine''': No. What Salem wants, is to turn us ''against'' each other... just like this. Jaune has a point. We can work separately, and still be united.
:'''Penny Polendina''': Or... let ''me'' take the Relic to Salem... and maybe she will call off her attack, on the Kingdom.
:'''Oscar Pine''': I don't think we can trust Salem to actually do that... and the moment she uses the Staff to create anything else, Atlas falls onto Mantle.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[to Penny]'' Nobody's turning you over to ''anybody.'' I think that's the ''one'' thing we could all agree on.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Okay. Then I guess ''we're'' going to Atlas. ''[Nora nods]'' Can you help us get to that terminal?
:'''Pietro Polendina''': I, uh... suppose someone needs to help you bypass security-
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[quietly] I'll'' go.
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Penny, we can't risk-
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[turns around, Maiden flames emitting from her eyes] I'll go.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[sighs]''... Do what you gotta do. I'm going out there to see what ''I'' can do. ''[she heads for the door, her teammates watching her]''
:'''Pietro Polendina''': Yang? ''[he tosses her some keys]'' Go by the pharmacy. I was developing some new tools for you, before all... ''this'' happened. You're gonna need them.
:'''Lie Ren''': Nora?
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': I'm going with Ruby.
:'''Lie Ren''': But, what about Mantle?
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Oh, ''I'm'' saving Mantle. Because I ''actually'' believe we can do this!

===Refuge [Volume 8, Episode 2]===
===Strings [Volume 8, Episode 3]===
===Fault [Volume 8, Episode 4]===
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[checking her Scroll]'' We need to get out of this weather, before the cold drops our Auras completely. How much further to the outpost? ''[Ren doesn't answer]'' Ren? how much-
:'''Lie Ren''': ''[curtly]'' I don't know.
''[Yang glances back at Jaune, who shrugs, then moves up next to Ren]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I thought you said you saw it, when you were up in the air.
:'''Lie Ren''': I ''did''... before I had to cut myself loose, to help you guys.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Yeah... you've brought that up a couple times, now. Something you need to say?
:'''Lie Ren''': Not really. Wouldn't want to waste any more time. ''[He moves ahead, but Yang follows him]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Hey! What is your deal?
:'''Lie Ren''': Don't worry about it.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Well, I'm sorry things aren't going ''smoothly'' enough for you!
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''Guys.''
:'''Lie Ren''': They're not going &quot;smoothly&quot; at all!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I hate to break it to you, but that's part of being a Huntsman!
:'''Lie Ren''': Are you kidding?! We don't know the first ''thing'' about being Huntsmen! We clearly weren't ''ready!''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Guys, stop it!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Were we &quot;not ready&quot; when we saved Haven? When we took down a ''Leviathan?'' We got the Lamp to Atlas-
:'''Lie Ren''': And then we ''lost'' it! And after that, when we had to make ''real'' decisions, we got every single one wrong. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': I'm not going to pretend like we did everything perfectly. But if we'd done ''nothing'', things would be even worse than they are now!
:'''Lie Ren''': How could they possibly be worse? We are stuck out here while Salem has the Lamp, ''and'' Oscar! We've got no plan, no army-
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': We've got the Maiden!
:'''Lie Ren''': And by keeping her from opening the Vault for Ironwood, we're just trapping the WHOLE city, for Salem! ''[walks away, stares up at Atlas] People are going to die...'' because of ''us.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': So, what? We should just give ''Ironwood'' what he wants? Abandon Mantle?! You think Atlas is still gonna be able to ''float to safety'', now that she's here?!
:'''Lie Ren''': I don't know! But these aren't the kind of decisions we should be making, because we have no idea what we're doing!
:'''Jaune Arc''': Okay, ''both'' of you: cut it out!
:'''Lie Ren''': I'm just saying, what nobody else wants to: we're in ''way'' over our heads. Ruby is barely more than a kid, I'm just an orphan from the middle of nowhere-
:'''Jaune Arc''': Ren, I-
:'''Lie Ren''': ''You'', cheated your way into ''Beacon!''
''[All three of them freeze. After a tense pause, Ren looks away]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[curtly]''... You don't think we should be Huntsmen? ''Fine''. But I'm getting out of the cold. ''[quietly, as he passes Ren]'' We've still got a job to do.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[to Ren]'' Seriously, is your goal just to push ''everyone'' away?
----
''[Oscar wakes up in an cell on Monstra]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': Oscar? Don't panic. We're going to be okay.
:'''Oscar Pine''': What?...
''[He notices he is hanging from the Hound's jaws. Salem watches him from the doorway, smoky images of her daughters dancing over her hand]''
:'''Salem''': My long-lost Ozma... found, at last. ''[she snuffs out her illusion and approaches, as Oscar struggles]'' So ''small'', this new host of yours. It's a wonder my Hound didn't break you. It's been... how many ''years'', since we saw each other like this, face to face? And nothing to say?
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[imitating Ozpin's intonations]'' I'm... sorry the reunion, isn't living up to your ''expectations.''
''[Salem stares at him, then suddenly grabs his face, dragging him close]''
:'''Salem''': ''[menacingly]'' You can ''pretend'', boy... but you're not fully him. Not ''yet'', at least. ''[she releases him]'' Well... perhaps you and I can have a better ''working'' relationship. Oscar, was it? ''[she walks around him and the Hound, scratching its' shoulder]'' The Beacon Relic. My forces have been unable to locate the Relic beneath the school. If I know my Ozma... he has used some means of deception, to hide its' location differently than the others. I need to know where it is.
:'''Oscar Pine''': I... that's not something I know about.
:'''Salem''': Of course. ''[walks away]'' He ''would'' keep that one guarded, as long as possible. How about something easier, then? The password for the Lamp.
:'''Oscar Pine''': ...The Lamp is, all out of questions.
''[Salem turns and fires a magic bolt into Oscar's chest, causing him to scream in agony]''
:'''Salem''': The lies come out of you ''so easily... [she approaches and carresses his cheek, causing Oscar to flinch]'' Like-minded souls, ''indeed.'' One of you, is going to tell me what you know. I don't much care if it is you, ''or'' Ozma. Either way... I'll ''finally'' have the Relic.
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[groaning, defiantly]''... I won't tell you ''anything.''
''[Salem shrugs, then opens the door. Hazel enters, his expression grim.]''
:'''Oscar Pine''': Hazel? Wait, wait- ''[Hazel punches him in the gut, knocking him from the Hound's grip]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''That'', was for Haven Academy. ''[He kicks Oscar in the ribs, then cracks his neck]'' Everything that follows... will be for my ''sister.''

===Amity [Volume 8, Episode 5]===
===Midnight [Volume 8, Episode 6]===
===War [Volume 8, Episode 7]===
===Dark [Volume 8, Episode 8]===
''[Ruby and Blake attempt to start the auxiliary power generator on Schnee Manor]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Ah, C'mon, c'mon!
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Don't worry. It'll work.
:'''Ruby Rose''': Nothing else has.
:'''Blake Belladonna''':... I know... you don't always know ''what'' to do. But that's never stopped you from doing ''something''. I was like that as a girl, but time and... a lot of ''other'' things, took their toll on me. Then, I wasn't sure if that kind of girl could actually survive in the world... Until I met ''you.'' It was a little strange at first, because you were younger, but... I've always looked up to you, Ruby. And I still do.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tearing up]'' ...Thanks, Blake.
''[The generator activates. Blake smiles at Ruby, but then her smile fades and her cat ears droop]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': What?
''[The Hound's silhouette looms menacingly outside the window behind her]''
-----
''[Penny cries out as Watts' computer virus tries to hack her, alerting the Hound]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': It's coming!
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[struggling]'' I'm sorry!
''[After a few moments, her eyes turn red as the virus takes control; she marches toward the door of Weiss's room. Klein tries to stop her, but Penny shoves him away, then marches out the entrance hall, passing Whitley and Willow]''
:'''Whitley Schnee''': What are you doing?!
:'''Penny Polendina''': I must open the Vault... and then, self-terminate.
''[The Hound suddenly lunges at her. Penny blocks its' attack, but it sprouts another arm, grabs her head and bashes her against the floor, shutting her down]''
:'''Hound''': ''Take. The Girl. [picks her up as Ruby, Weiss and Blake appear at the bottom of the stairs]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Penny!
''[The Hound holds its' claws to Penny's throat threateningly.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[angrily]'' That's... ''enough.''
''[Ruby activates her Silver Eyes, blasting the Hound back through the window. Penny topples down the stairs, unconscious. As Ruby and her friends gather around, they are interrupted as the Hound starts to crawl back through the window. It's head has been blasted away to reveal the face of a scarred, mutilated Faunus... with Silver Eyes.]''
:'''Faunus/Hound''': ''[unsteadily, as it staggers forward]'' Take... the girl. Take... the girl! Take! The! Girl!
''[Stunned and horrified, Ruby and her teammates drag Penny backward as the Hound advances down the steps, joints cracking and popping. The Grimm liquid covering its' body begins to cover its' face, regenerating its' Hound head]''
:'''Faunus/Hound''': Take! The! Girl! Take! The! ''Girl!''
''[On the stairs above, Witley gestures to Willow, indicating a giant ornamental suit of armor and sword; they both push against it as the Hound finishes regenerating.]''
:'''Hound''': ''TAKE! THE! GIRL!''
''[As it lunges forward, the armor and sword crashes down, killing it. Ruby falls to her knees, shocked.]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': What ''was'' that?
:'''Ruby Rose''': That was... a ''person.''
''[The Hound's forearm crumbles to dust, but the skeleton of its' host remains]''
:'''

===Witch [Volume 8, Episode 9]===
''[After a brief battle, Salem immobilizes Yang, Jaune, Oscar, Ren and Emerald with shadow tendrils; she approaches Emerald, a crackling sphere of magic in her hand.]''
:'''Salem''': What did you do with the Lamp?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[confused]'' N-nothing.
:'''Salem''': ''[holds the sphere near Emerald's face]''  It's ... ''missing''. Where is it?
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''I'' didn't do anything with it!
:'''Salem''': Where... ''is'' it?!
''[She approaches Oscar, her tendrils lifting him to face her]''
:'''Salem''': ''[sighs]'' Look, how you've diminished. How you've lessened yourself, and for ''what?'' These children, this ruined world? ''[Enraged, she suddenly grabs his face, her nails near his eyes]'' ''Why... do... you.. keep...coming...back?!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Why do ''you?!'' ''[Salem releases Oscar and approaches her]'' All of this endless death, just because something ''bad'' happened to you once upon a time?! Nobody gets a fairy-tale ending! Everything... I've lost, every ''person''... I've lost, is because of ''YOU!''
:'''Salem''': ''[scornfully]'' And who is it I've &quot;taken&quot; from ''you'', girl?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Summer Rose... my ''Mom!''
:'''Salem''': Hmm... ''[bends forward with an amused smile]...Her'', again.
:'''Hazel Rainart''': Your Grace.
:'''Salem''': Ah, Hazel. I found our guests.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': No-! ''[Salem covers her mouth with a shadow tendril]''
:'''Salem''': ''[gestures to Emerald] This'' one, was helping them. ''[her tendrils drop Oscar to the floor]'' Take the boy back to his chamber. I have ''work'' to do, on this one.
:'''Hazel Rainart''': Yes, of course. 
''[He glances at each of the prisoners, Emerald's pleading eyes following him, then grabs Oscar by the collar and lifts him until they are eye-to-eye]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''[leans close to Oscar's ear, mutters] No more Gretchens, boy.''
''[He drops Oscar, having slipped Long Memory into his hand. Salem brings her magic sphere close to Emerald's face again]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[tearfully]'' I ''really'' don't know!
''[as Salem prepares to torture Emerald, Hazel punches her in the jaw, hurling her backward. She cushions her landing with a whirlwind and rises again, her eyes glowing angrily, but her shadow tendrils release the prisoners. Hazel tosses aside his vest, revealing his stash of Dust crystals]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''GO, NOW!! [He stabs five crystals into his shoulders, overdosing his body with the Dust's power and activating his Semblance]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': Hazel...''[She shakes her head softly]''
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''[smiles reassuringly]''...Go.
:'''Salem''': So, you've decided ''against'' vengeance for your sister, after ''all'' this time?
:'''Hazel Rainart''': ''[conjures fireballs over his fists, settling into a combat stance]'' I'm doing what ''Gretchen'' would have done!

===Ultimatum [Volume 8, Episode 10]===
''[Cinder and Watts watch Monstra crumble in the distance]''
:'''Arthur Watts''': Did... Did anyone respond?
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[glances at her Scroll]'' No.
:'''Arthur Watts''': Well, ''she'll'' come back. In the interim, we need a plan.
:'''Cinder Fall''': Plan? The plan hasn't changed. I'm going to rip the Maiden power out of Penny Polendina, because ''you're'' going to bring her to me.
:'''Arthur Watts''': I beg your pardon?
:'''Cinder Fall''': You said in your message that you had control over Penny.
:'''Arthur Watt''': I said that I had Penny ''under control'', not that I could telekinetically force her to do whatever I want.
:'''Cinder Fall''':...''What?'' 
:'''Arthur Watts''': I implanted a ''virus'' into her, you dimwit. She's on a set path now... at least, she ''should'' be. ''[turns away]'' As much as I hate to admit it, there seems to be some part of her capable of... ''resisting.'' Regardless, it's only a matter of time before her mechanical body succombs to the virus. She'll open the Vault, then she'll destroy herself, and our little Penny problem will be-
''[Cinder suddenly siezes him by his lapel, dragging him close]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': What do you mean, she'll destroy herself?! How am I supposed to take her powers if she's dead?!
:'''Arthur Watts''': You know, it's impressive that you haven't realized this yet, but I don't ''work'' for you! ''[Cinder growls and extends her Grimm arm, dangling Watts off the building's edge] Please''. You can't just threaten me, like everyone else!
:'''Cinder Fall''': You think you're ''so'' clever, don't you, Arthur?
:'''Arthur Watts''': Salem sent you to bring me back-
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''Salem'', isn't here right now... but I think we can still come up with a plan, while she's ''pulling herself together.'' First, I'm gonna watch you plummet to an unremarkable end. And then, I'm gonna burn a path directly to the Vault. Where I will wait, to tear that magical puppet to ''pieces''... and take, what is ''mine.''
''[She conjures flames in her fist, smiling confidently, but her smile fades as Watts starts to laugh]''
:'''Arthur Watts''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, of ''course'' you are! Because that's just what you ''do'', isn't it? And how has that worked out for you? ''[Cinder's Maiden powers begin to activate, as his words trigger flashbacks of her previous defeats]'' You ''stormed'' into Fria's room, thinking you could take on Ironwood's top fighter and war machine. But you ''couldn't.'' And that ''machine'' became the Winter Maiden. Oh, and let's not forget your deal with Raven Branwen! Get all your enemies in one place so you'd have a ''shot'' at revenge. If ''only'' someone could have warned you against such a miserable idea! Oh, wait: ''I DID!'' But ''you'' pushed ahead, and you lost it when all you had to do was your ''job!''
''[Cinder becomes increasingly angry as she flashes back to her childhood abuse]''
:'''Arthur Watts''': You think you're entitled to everything just because you've suffered, but suffering ''isn't'' enough! You can't just be strong, you have to be ''smart!'' You can't just be deserving, you have to be ''worthy!'' But all you have ''ever'' been, is a ''BLOODY MIGRAINE!''
''[Cinder screams in rage, but instead of letting Watts fall, she drops him at her feet; she walks away and sits quietly on the ledge, shedding a silent tear. Behind her, Watts exhales heavily]''

===Risk [Volume 8, Episode 11]===
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[glaincing at the broken armor]'' You know, that giant Hound kicked us around like we were ''nothing''. But Blake said you and the Schnees managed to take it down. Still having to one-up your big sis, huh?
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[quietly]'' ... Did she tell you what it was, underneath?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''':... Yeah. 
:'''Ruby Rose''': You know what that ''means'', then.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...I wouldn't worry about that-
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''That's what happened to Mom. [Yang's facade of confidence falls, and she sits down and starts to cry]''  When I saw its' eyes... I knew. Salem used to ''kill'' people with Silver Eyes... like Maria. But she's alway wanted ''me'' alive. Why would that change, unless... when she met Mom... she learned she could do something ''new.''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[stands up, approaches Ruby]'' Ruby...
:'''Ruby Rose''': We shouldn't lie to ourselves! I wasted our time, getting Amity up, thinking help would come, but it didn't. And Amity ''fell''. I was being childish.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ...You were being ''optimistic. [Sits with Ruby]'' Look, blind optimism isn't great... but ''no'' optimism, means we've already lost. We ''need'' hope. We need, to take risks-
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[ pulls away angrily]'' But mine ''didn't'' work!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[sighs]'' It still got a warning out! Ruby, they're not called sure things! They're called risks, and in case you didn't notice, ''my'' plan for Mantle didn't work either! But we got Oscar back, and did a ''lot'' more that was never in the plan. Mom... took a risk, the day she left. And I don't think... I don't think it went the way she wanted it to. ''[hugs Ruby, who is tearing up]'' But she's ''still'' my hero.
-----
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[overcome by the virus]'' I can no longer be delayed.''[Ruby, her friends and Emerald rush outside as Penny prepares to take off]''
:'''Ruby Rose''':  ''[rushes to her and grabs her arm]'' Penny, ''please!''
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[flickering between herself and the virus]'' I- I ''must'' open the Vault! ''Rrgh!'' I' I do not want- ''Agh!'' Ruby! Stop me!
:'''Ruby Rose''': Penny! ''[grabs Penny's waist]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[her eyes go fully red with the virus]'' I ''must'' open the Vault. And self-terminate.
''[She takes off, Ruby clinging to her, but Blake catches her arm with Gambol Shroud; Ren catches her other arm with StormFlower. Both of them strain to hold her back, Nora, Yang, Jaune and Oscar supporting them. Once Penny returns to the ground, Wiess anchors her with a Gravity Glyph]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': I've got her!
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': What do we do?!
''[Penny activates her Maiden powers, breaking Weiss' grip with a cyclone and lifting off, still carrying Ruby.]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': I ''must''... open the Vault... and ''self-terminate!''
''[Emerald catches her by the shoulders with Thieve's Respite, anchoring her again]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''Do'' something!
''[Jaune uses his Semblance to amplify Weiss's Aura, allowing her to connjure a stronger Glyph and force Penny back to the ground.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[hugging Penny's shoulders]'' Penny, ''please.'' Tell me how to help you!
:'''Penny Polendina''':  ''[her eyes turn green again]...Kill me. [Ruby looks shocked]'' Kill me... and I can make ''sure'' the power goes to you. Please... ''please! [the virus  starts to take her over again]'' I cannot fight it!
:'''Nora Valkyrie''': Yes, you can! It's just a ''part'' of you, remember? If you were ''only'' a machine, you ''never'' could've fought back for this long!
:'''Ruby Rose''':... She's right... She's right! ''Jaune!'' Boost her Aura!
''[Jaune amplifys Penny's Aura with his Semblance, forcing the virus back. Ruby slowly releases Penny, who smiles and nods gratefully to Jaune, before Ruby hugs her. The group gathers around, with Nora hugging her too.]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Did... I stop the virus?
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[frowns]''... No. It's still there. But...
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[holds her hand]'' You've got an ''Aura'', Penny. A ''soul. That's'' who you are. Our ''friend''... not a machine.
''[Penny beams, squeezing her and Nora's hands]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': I think you're ''wrong'', by the way. ''[the group turn to face her]'' I highly doubt you're in the same place, ''you'' started. I mean, yeah...you, you guys've been getting your asses kicked. Some of that, my fault. But, like, you're at ''war.'' You're gonna take hits. ''[sighs]'' Look, I'm just gonna be ''super'' pissed if you all ''finally'' decide to give up the moment I switch sides!
:'''Oscar Pine''': ''[smiles]'' &quot;Switch sides&quot;, huh?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Awww... ''[the group laugh]''
:'''Emerald Sustrai''': ''[pouts]'' Or, like... whatever! ''[Oscar offers her a hand up]''
:'''Oscar Pine''': If, you all don't mind... I really think ''Ozpin'' would like to say something. ''[the group glance at Ruby]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ...Go ahead.
''[Oscar relinquishes control of his body to Ozpin]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': I was recently... reminded, of an old fairy tale. A young girl, flees the consequences of a choice, to a magical place. But, having never learned from her initial failure... she only succeeds in spreading it. I failed, ''all'' of you. I should have trusted you, with the truth... and should never have ''run'', the day you discovered it.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[glances at Blake]'' It was... rough. But...
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I think after everything that's happened here... we understand. Trust is...
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Trust is, a ''risk. [glances at her family]''
:'''Professor Ozpin/Ozma''': And I hope... it's a risk you can take on me, again.

===Creation [Volume 8, Episode 12]===
===Worthy [Volume 8, Episode 13]===
===The Final Word [Volume 8, Episode 14]===
''[Cinder corners a weakened Weiss]''
:'''Cinder Fall''':  It figures that a ''Schnee'' would be the last one standing. Letting all your friends die, first...
''[She spews flames at Weiss, but Penny flies in and deflects them with her crystal blades]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': You wouldn't know ''anything'', about friends.
''[Jaune leaps into the fight, blasting Cinder back with his shield, and drawing his sword. As Cinder rises to face the trio, she gasps in pain as her Grimm arm suddenly convulses]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': ''[smugly] She's back...''
''[As Penny flies forward, Cinder forces her back with obsidian projectiles, then uses walls of flame to separate her, Weiss and Jaune. As Penny looks for them in concern, she gives a cry of pain as Cinder's Grimm arm impales her torso. She crumples to the ground, but Weiss drives Cinder away before she can siphon Penny's Maiden powers. Jaune kneels next to her.]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': Penny! Just... hold on! ''[He tries to boost her Aura]'' My Semblance-
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''No''... There's not enough time to heal me. She can't get the Staff ''and'' the power. But there ''is'' something, you can do. ''[she reaches for his sword]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[pulls back, shocked]'' I- I don't know where the others are, but- Weiss will give us time! 
''[Behind them, Weiss desperately tries to hold off Cinder's relentless attacks, using both her sword and Blake's, but she is clearly outmatched. Penny reaches for Jaune's sword again.]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': Let me choose... this ''one'' thing. ''[smiles weakly]'' Trust me!
''[As Jaune stares at his sword, Cinder knocks Gambol Shroud from Weiss's hand, sending it into the void. In the Winter Maiden's Vault, Ironwood lands a heavy blow on Winter, throwing her backward and breaking her Aura. Cinder knocks down Weiss, advancing for the killing blow, but freezes when she hears Jaune's anguished cry behind her. Both his tears and Penny's blood from his sword, drip onto the platform.]''

''[In a limbo-like space, Penny waits patiently. She suddenly smiles and waves]''
:'''Penny Polendina''': Sal-u- tations! You made it!
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[approaching her]'' Where... what is this?
:'''Penny Polendina''': I thought of you... and, here we are.
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[understanding instantly]'' Oh, ''Penny''... 
:'''Penny Polendina''': It seemed fitting, that it should be you. It was ''your'' power, after all.
:'''Winter Schnee''': No, Penny. ''You'' were always the real Maiden, at heart. ''I'' was just the machine... just, following orders. 
:'''Penny Polendina''': ''[takes Winter's hands in hers]'' You were my ''friend.''
''[The glow of the Maiden Powers passes from her hands, to Winter's]''
:'''Winter Schnee''': ...''Thank you'', for trusting me with this. When you're gone-
:'''Penny Polendina''': I won't be ''gone''. I'll be part of you.
:'''Winter Schnee''': ''[smiling tearfully]'' Good. I'm glad.
''[Penny smiles one last time and dissolves into light as Winter wakes, to find Ironwood staring down at her]''
:'''James Ironwood''': So... the destiny I chose for you, has finally arrived.
''[Winter rises to her feet, her head lowered.]''
:'''Winter Schnee''': You chose ''nothing. [An icy whirlwind lifts her and her swords, off the ground]'' This... was a ''gift.''
''[She opens her eyes, blue flames flaring from them. Ironwood fires his Dust cannon, but Winter effortlessly deflects the shot back, knocking him down, then flies into the Vault's portal]''
----
''[In the Winter Maiden's Vault, an injured Ironwood awakens. As Cinder exits the portal carrying the Staff and the Lamp, her smug expression turns frightened as a trail of smoke swirls down the lift toward her.]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': I... I failed you again, Master. They used the Staff to save ''thousands.'' Before our allies fell, Neopolitan... ''killed'', Ruby. And before Ruby and her teammates fell... They ''used'' the Lamp's final question.
''[The smoke circles Cinder, then swirls together, materializing into Salem. Her eyes narrow suspiciously]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': I- I couldn't stop them! I couldn't even stop the Maiden from escaping, without putting the Relics in jeopardy! I'm... I'm sorry. 
''[she kneels, holding out the Staff and Lamp. Salem approaches and accepts the Relics, examining them]''
:'''Salem''': In pursuit of a new world... no cost, is too great. You've done well, Cinder. Our work here is done.
''[She starts to leave the Vault; Cinder rises and follows her, looking smug again. Ironwood crawls toward his dropped gun]''
:'''Salem''': You said they ''used'' the Staff? I assume you rid the world of their Creation. What did you create... in its' stead?
''[In Atlas' military compound, flames engulf the complex. Inside Atlas Central Command, Watts tries in vain to break out, screaming in desperation]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': I merely added more ''flames'', to the fires of Atlas.
''[Salem smiles. There is a sudden click of a hammer, and Cinder glances back to see Ironwood aiming his pistol at her. She smiles]''
:'''Cinder Fall''': And that's... ''checkmate''.
''[As she and Salem leave the Vault, Ironwood sadly lowers the gun, accepting his fate. As Salem and Cinder fly away from the burning city, Atlas crashes into Mantle's crater. The impact dislodges glacial ice, causing nearby frozen lakes to rapidly flood and submerge the city. From the airship, Qrow, Robyn and the Ace-Ops watch in shock, Qrow desperately calling for Ruby and Yang in his earpiece.]''

== Volume 9 ==
===Rude, Red and Royal [Volume 9, Episode 3]===

===A Cat Most Curious [Volume 9, Episode 4]===
:'''Herbalist''': Please... take a seat.
:'''Blake''': Actually, I think... Maybe we should be going! ''[nervously smiles]'' Right, Ruby?
:'''Herbalist''': This won’t take long.
:'''Ruby''': Umm... ''[turns around]''
:''[Suddenly, the door behind them closes, and Team RWBY gasps in shock.]''
:'''Herbalist''': Just... answer the questions. ''[Ruby turns around. He inhales another puff of smoke from the hookah; echo]'' ''What... are... you?''
:''[The Herbalist drops the leaves in their hands into the fire pit in front of them, causing a large amount of black smoke to surround Team RWBY. Ruby starts to cough violently, falling to her knees. Her shrunken teammates fall out of her hands.]''
:'''Ruby''': No! ''[coughs again]''
:'''Herbalist''': ''[echo]'' Are you sure you know? You have to be sure what you are, and of what you’re going to be...
:''[Weiss, Blake, and Yang get up, but the smoke is too thick for them to see, and they are separated.]''
:'''Yang''': Blake! Ruby! ''[coughs; Black smoke comes out from her mouth and it takes the form of her own past self; confused]'' What?
:'''Past Yang''': You don’t have to go forward, y’know? You can go back, back to before.
:'''Yang''': ''[stares down at her prosthetic arm and holds it]'' What? What are you talking about?
:''[Meanwhile, in another space with Blake and her past self...]''
:'''Past Blake''': It’s simple, really. You could just be human, or just a cat, if you wanted. Really, it’s up to you.
:'''Blake''': Why would I do that?
:'''Past Blake''': Like I said, it’s simple, much simpler than trying to be a bridge between Humans and Faunus. Why struggle with that responsibility?
:''[The current Blake frowns. Meanwhile, in another space with Weiss and her past self..]''
:'''Past Weiss''': The Schnee name. Why bother, anymore? What even stands for now? Instead, you could be a nobody. Could you imagine? Not even a single bit of baggage on your shoulders. Isn’t that what you want? To be free?
:'''Past Blake''': To be something simpler?
:'''Past Yang''': To be whole again?
:'''Yang''': ''[gives a serious, yet determined look on her face]'' No. My losses, my failures. Those more than anything are what have shaped me into who I am, showed me how I need to grow. If there’s something I’m missing, it’s not because I lost it. It’s because I haven’t found it yet. And the only way to do that is to keep going.
:'''Blake''': A simple life wouldn’t be my life! ''[draws Gambol Shroud’s katana]'' My family, my friends, my culture. I belong to them, just as much as they belong to me. To give that all away wouldn’t be simplicity, it would be betrayal.
:'''Weiss''': I don’t know who you think you are, but let me tell you who I am: I am the granddaughter of a hero and a child of a villain. ''[points Myrtenaster at her past self]'' I am a citizen of a fallen Kingdom and an heir to nothing. I will not be defined by my name because I will be the one to define it. I am Weiss Schnee, and I am a Huntress!
:'''Blake''': I am a Huntress!
:'''Yang''': I am a Huntress!
:''[Elsewhere, Ruby is seen despondent and is on her knees while her past self stands over her.]''
:'''Past Ruby''': So, are you a Huntress? Like the ones you read about in books?
:'''Ruby''': ''[quietly]'' I... I don’t know...
:'''Past Ruby''': They always saved the day, didn’t they? Always knew what to do. Always won in the end.
:'''Ruby''': ''[lowering her head]'' But... life isn’t like a fairy tale...
:'''Past Ruby''': That’s right! It’s up to you to make things better, isn’t it? Everything all depends on you! Your sister needs you, your friends need you, the whole world needs you to keep fighting, forever and ever, against an invincible monster that took your mother! ''[Ruby’s eyes widen upon hearing this]'' Mom was the best, ''[frowning]'' but even she failed. That doesn’t seem fair. None of this seems fair.
:'''Ruby''': But... What am I supposed to do...?
:'''Past Ruby''': You can do whatever you want. Be whoever you want! You don’t even have to be Ruby Rose... ''[Ruby looks down, seemingly on the verge of despair]'' So, what are you gonna be?

===Confessions Within Cumulonimbus Clouds [Volume 9, Episode 6]===
''[Blake and Yang are caught on opposite, incomplete rope bridges leading to a central column, amidst a massive windstorm]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You all right?
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I'll feel a lot ''better'', when we're together on that platform! 
''[A missing section of the bridge materializes in front of Blake; surprised, she advances]''
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Uhhh... is it a password, or something? &quot;Together!&quot; &quot;Platform!&quot; ''[nothing happens]''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': No luck?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[shakes her head and smiles]'' I'm sure ''you'll'' figure it out, though. You're good at that.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': You think so?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': Well, yeah! You've got a really good... brain. ''[as she chuckles weakly, a section materializes on her bridge]'' Okay, that did something! ''[advances]'' Uhh... I talked about you, so... ''[clears her throat]'' You have cat ears! ''[Blake smiles and twitches her ears, but nothing happens]''... I think your cat ears are ''cute. [Another section appears, she advances] Nailed'' it! Even though I don't know what 'it' is, yet.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Maybe it's... saying things we've never said. To each other. ''[Yang shrugs sheepishly and gestures for her to try]'' I... think you're an ''extraordinary'' person. ''[Yang looks shocked]'' You're... always the first, to lighten a situation. You act bravely, when you're afraid. You ''do'', what you say. ''[As the winds begin to fade, a large section of Blake's bridge appears, and she advances with a smile]'' Try to keep up!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''':... I like that you've never been ''intimidated'' by me. Even when you didn't like me all that much.  
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[looks away]'' I was... a little wary of people in general. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': But you never gave up on them. Even when they hurt you. You ''never'' give up. You know what ''matters'' to you. ''[a large section of her bridge appears, and she advances]'' Let's make this quicker. Any... big truths we haven't dropped on each other yet? 
''[As the sky lightens, Blake looks away, blushing slightly, then meets Yang's gaze with a smile. Yang's eyes widen, and she looks away quickly; both their bridges suddenly extend, pulling both of them back from the pillar]'' 
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Did you just... think of something, then didn't say it?
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[blushes]''... That ''can't'' be what this is about. ''[she looks fearfully at Blake, who is smiling at her; mentally]'' It's like... a cliff. And if I do it, I'm just going to... ''fall''.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''[mentally]'' I think we're ''already'' falling. ''[aloud]'' Just... ''say'' it, Yang.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': ''[takes a deep breath]''... I... think I love you-
:'''Blake Belladonna''': I love you, too.
''[Suddenly, both are standing on the pillar, directly in front of each other. After looking into each other's eyes for a moment, they both blush, smile, and kiss as flowers bloom around them.]''

===The Perils of Paper Houses [Volume 9, Episode 7]===
:'''Jaune''': ''[slamming his hands to the ground]'' I couldn’t save them... I was supposed to save them and... and they’re dead... ''[Juniper walks to his side and comforts him]''
:'''Yang''': No, Jaune. They’re gone, but they’re not dead. They’ll be back.
:'''Weiss''': Yeah, it’s what they wanted. ''[turns to Ruby]'' Right, Ruby?
:'''Ruby''': ''[has a scowling expression on her face; venomous]'' Why are you asking me?
:'''Blake''': ''[she, Weiss, and Yang look at her in shock]'' Um, we just--
:'''Ruby''': Because I’m the leader? ''[clenches fist]'' Because I’m just supposed to have something to say? ''[looks up angrily]'' Cuz I don’t... I mean, why do I have to be the leader anyway? Why do I have to always be the one to pick people up? What about me? “No time”, right? ''[walks to Weiss, who reels back]'' &quot;Gotta get home!&quot;, &quot;Gotta help Jaune!&quot;, Gotta find someone who isn’t just going to screw everything up! ''[turns to Blake and Yang]'' “Gotta stay positive!” Right?! ''[Blake hides behind Yang, who instinctively protects her as Ruby approaches them; sarcastically]'' Smiles all around! Maybe even finally get our feelings sorted out! Good for you, by the way. We’re all so happy for you!
:'''Yang''': ''[angered]'' Hey...
:'''Ruby''': I’m sorry, is this a bad time? '''''Are we supposed to be mourning Jaune’s make-believe friends?!'''''
:'''Jaune''': ''[seething]'' They’re gone... because of YOU! ''[stands up]'' The Walkers came for you, because Neo. Hates. '''YOU!''' ''[walks over to Ruby]'' '''Oh, and let’s not forget the reason we’re in the Ever After in the first place is because of your plan that didn’t work! What about you?! &lt;big&gt;IT’S ALL ABOUT YOU!&lt;/big&gt;''' ''[Ruby looks up at him angrily, gritting her teeth and on the verge of tears]''
:'''Weiss''': Jaune...
:'''Jaune''': ''[snaps out of his rage and realizes what he said]'' I’m sorry, I… I know I’m not okay. I- I’m not right, but... How am I supposed to be...? I’ve been alone… for '''SO... LONG!''' Here... On that bridge... I was the only one that could do it! I was the '''ONLY ONE!''' ''[Weiss, Blake, and Yang, look at him in pity]'' And I... ''[tears stream down his face]'' And now I have to live with that forever... In here or back home...
:'''Blake''': Guys, I know things are bad, but--
:'''Ruby''': ''[grimacing]'' Shut... Up... ''[the gang look at her wide-eyed]'' Don’t... do that... ''[tears begin to stream down her face]'' Just don’t...
:''[Little lowers their head in pity in Ruby’s hood. Ruby then turns around and picks up Crescent Rose, using her Semblance to fly away from her friends and sister into the forest. Weiss, Blake and Yang helplessly watch their leader go, while Jaune and Juniper over look the now submerged village of the Paper Pleasers.]''

===Tea Amidst Terrible Trouble [Volume 9, Episode 8]===
:''[Ruby walks through the forest. It begins to darken around her as she continues to walk. A glowing blue butterfly flutters past Ruby. As Ruby continues walking, a spotlight appears above her. Each spotlight shows Ruby walking slowly and much slower than the first two. She crosses the bridge between the Origami Acre and the Abandoned Acre. She arrives at a pink-colored extravagant manor that Neo created. Everything goes dark. Another spotlight appears above Ruby again, but this time, Ruby is somehow inside the mansion and in a room standing in front of a portrait of a family of three. The other portraits appear in few spotlights. The first two portraits depict Trivia Vanille--Neo's real name--both as a child and adolescent, with her parents Jimmy and Carmel Vanille. The other portrait depicts her with Cinder standing besides Salem’s throne. Ruby slowly walked towards the largest portrait, depicting Roman Torchwick and Neo with her parents lying on the ground, apparently dead.]''
:'''Ruby''': What is this?
:''[As Ruby stares at the portrait, Roman’s left eye moves to gaze at her direction.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': Hello, Red! ''[Ruby gasps and brandishes Crescent Rose’s scythe form, backing away from the portrait. He stands up from his seat]'' Been a while. ''[jumps off from the trunk and casually walks]'' How’s the hero biz treatin’ ya? I gotta say, you’re not looking too good. ''[gives a kick at Jimmy's corpse]''
:'''Ruby''': Where’s Neo?
:'''Neo-Roman''': Yeesh, no manners. And after everyone came out to see you! ''[echoes]''
:''[The lights begin to turn on in the room Ruby was in. Ruby turns around and becomes astonished to see certain people at the table: Penny Polendina, Pyrrha Nikos, Leonardo Lionheart, Clover Ebi, Ozpin and General James Ironwood. Each of them has a cup of tea in front of them.]''
:'''Neo-Penny''': ''[saluting]'' Salutations, Ruby!
:'''Neo-Pyrrha''': ''[waving]'' Hello again!
:''[Neo-Lionheart is seen fiddling with his lion tail before he looks at Ruby and sits up straight. Neo-Clover adjusts his clover badge.]''
:'''Neo-Ozpin''': ''[adjusting his glasses]'' Miss Rose.
:'''Neo-Ironwood''': ''[smiling and gesturing]'' Why don’t you take a seat?
:'''Ruby''': ''[looks on at the sight of the dead people she knew with horror]'' How is she doing this? ''[everyone at the table laughs at her bewilderment]'' Stop it! This isn’t real!
:'''Neo-Roman''': ''[suddenly appears next to Ruby]'' Is it real? ''[Ruby becomes startled by his presence beside her and falls to the floor]'' You’re the one following a talking cat around a fairy tale. ''[walks away from Ruby, twirling Melodic Cudgel. He jumps onto the table. Everyone stops laughing and stares at Ruby]'' Reality’s gettin’ fuzzier by the minute, kid. ''[Ruby twirls Crescent Rose scythe and changes to sniper gun at Neo-him and the Neo-others. He twirls his cane and plants it back on the floor; Walks towards the otherside of the table then stops just as he was about to step on the tea cup. He hops over then turns around to face Ruby]'' Y’know once Neo realized where she was, everything changed. Always loved the idea of a place to run away from it all. Do whatever you want. ''[sits down cross-legged on the table between Neo-Lionheart and Neo-Clover]'' I offered that to her back on Remnant. ''[gives a frown]'' But we all remember how that ended.
:'''Ruby''': Is that seriously what this is all about!? You still blame me for what happened to Torchwick!? ''[Neo-Roman growls]'' If you’re looking for an apology, you’ve wasted your time!
:''[On atop of the tea party room, Little arrives and watches, having not heeded Ruby's words from earlier.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': They say everyone thinks they’re the hero of their own story. ''[everyone at the table gives a wry grin; their eyes change to Neo’s eye colors]'' But... ''[stands up]'' I knew what I was. And deep down, I think you know you are too. ''[steps onto the teacup containing multi-colored liquid, breaking it with his shoe, as he walks towards Ruby. He takes out a multi-colored leaf in his hand]''
:'''Ruby''': The leaves from the Tree?
:'''Neo-Roman''': Oh, you’re familiar? How about a little reset?
:'''Ruby''': Is that what you want? Well, if you want me dead, then come get me!
:'''Neo-Roman''': ''[chuckles]'' You don’t deserve to die, Red. You deserve to be broken down... ''[casually releases the leaf]'' Torn apart... ''wiped from existence''.
:''[The multi-colored leaf falls into the teacup. Ruby hears the sound behind her and turns around, aiming Crescent Rose at Neo. Neo jumps over Ruby as she blocks the potshots with Hush. As Neo flies over Ruby, Neo-Roman shoots at Ruby with Melodic Cudgel. Ruby is sent backwards away from the table. Neo-Roman catches Neo with a chuckle as everyone at the table applauds. Neo smiles at Neo-Roman before they both look down on Ruby. Neo-Roman places Neo to the ground.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': I’m gonna enjoy...
:'''Neo-Everyone''': ''[stand up from their seats]'' '''...Watching you break.''' ''[they have their eyes closed with eerie smiles. Neo-Roman kneels behind Neo, who gives a closed-eye smile]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Back at the tea party room, Ruby uses her Semblance to dodge the attacks from Neo-Penny, Neo-Pyrrha, Neo-Lionheart and Neo-Ironwood with their weapons while Roman, Neo, Neo-Ozpin and Neo-Clover are watching.]''
:'''Neo-Ironwood''': Who were you to think you knew what was best for Atlas?
:'''Neo-Pyrrha''': I was the best and brightest Beacon had to offer. ''[Ruby gets shot down and clings onto the chandelier]'' But I traded my life so my friends could live!
:''[Neo-Pyrrha throws Miló javelin at the chain of the chandelier. Ruby falls to the floor, the impact breaking her Aura. She gets up to try and reach for Crescent Rose, but is stopped by Neo-Penny’s Maiden powered Floating Array. Ruby looks back at her.]''
:'''Neo-Penny''': Just like you were too late to save me at the Vytal Festival... I died in Atlas too, didn’t I? ''[walks towards Ruby]'' Can you imagine what that's like? To be completely and utterly failed... time and again... ''[kneels down to Ruby]'' by someone who meant the world to you...
:''[Ruby reaches her hand towards Neo-Penny with her eyes on the verge of tears, but Neo-Roman uses the curved end of Melodic Cudgel to choke her from behind.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': You ready for that drink yet? ''[Ruby manages to break free from his choking grip and runs but gets attacked by Neo-Pyrrha]''
:'''Neo-Pyrrha''': How many more people are going to die because of '''you?!''' ''[swings her body around Miló javelin and delivers a kick at Ruby, sending her to the wall. She struggles to walk along it]''
:'''Ruby''': I’m trying to save everyone! ''[gets punched in the gut by Neo-Ironwood, who then pins her to the wall]''
:'''Neo-Ironwood''': And yet with all your best intentions... ''[Little gasps in shock, watching Ruby getting overwhelmed]'' Have you ever stopped to wonder if you’d done more harm than good!? ''[throws Ruby to the floor]''
:'''Ruby''': It’s not my fault...! ''[attempts to reach Crescent Rose, only to get beaten up by Neo-Ozpin with The Long Memory]''
:'''Neo-Ozpin''': '''How many more lives do you have to ruin before you realize you’re not cut out to save anyone!?'''
:'''Ruby''': ''[grabs Crescent Rose and slashes at Neo-Ozpin]'' '''NO!!!'''
:''[The Long Memory falls to the floor. Ruby becomes horrified to see that she slashes Neo-Oscar in Neo-Ozpin’s place.]''
:'''Neo-Oscar''': ''[stares at his hand tainted with his own blood]'' Ruby...
:''[Neo-Oscar falls backwards and dies. Ruby drops Crescent Rose and collapses on her knees. Neo-Penny and Neo-Clover approach Neo-Oscar’s corpse. Neo-Penny, covering her mouth in shock, then changes to Neo-Yang. Neo-Clover changes to Neo-Qrow, now horrified over Neo-Oscar’s &quot;death&quot;. Neo-Lionheart changes to Neo-Blake looking at Ruby in disbelief. Neo-Ironwood changes to Neo-Weiss looking down at Ruby.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': Do you really think you can stand to watch more of your friends fall?
:'''Ruby''': Please... stop...
:'''Neo-Roman''': Or are you ready to admit the truth? That the world would just be better off without you?
:''[Neo-Jaune appears in Neo-Pyrrha’s place with Neo-Nora and Neo-Ren, mourning over Neo-Oscar. Ruby begins to hyperventilate in fear and panic as Neo-Jaune, Neo-Ren and Neo-Nora join the others. Ruby breaks down in broken sobs, placing her head and hands to the floor. Neo carries the teacup and approaches Ruby. She places down the teacup and moves it with her boot towards Ruby. Ruby lifts her head slowly, staring at the teacup filled with a multi-colored liquid. Neo kneels down before Ruby. Ruby stares at the teacup before she looks at Neo, who stands up and looks down on her with a smirk. Neo turns and gets attacked by a beam. She is sent flying backwards to outside of the manor. Her Semblance suddenly dispels over the manor. Ruby, in her perspective of view, slowly opens her eyes. A hole of the manor is shown with the Great Tree in the background. She then blinks and opens to multi-colored leaf brewing in the teacup. She later blinks to see the Cat.]''
:'''Curious Cat''': It’s all right, Ruby. It’s over now.
:'''Ruby''': What? I’m sorry… ''[moves her body over]'' I don’t want to be me anymore... ''[softly sobs, the Cat rubs his paw on her shoulder]''
:'''Curious Cat''': It’s okay, little Huntress... ''[jumps onto Ruby’s torso]'' '''I can be you instead...''' ''[Ruby opens her eyes in realization; he chuckles]'' I have been trying to wear you down for so long! ''[phases his paws through Ruby’s chest, causing her to scream in pain and agony]''
:'''Ruby''': What are you... doing?! ''[gasps]''
:'''Curious Cat''': My purpose. When a poor little heart is broken, I can fill it with mine. I’m afraid I haven’t been entirely honest with you, Ruby. ''[bares their fangs]''
:'''Ruby''': '''NO!'''
:'''Curious Cat''': I’m not like the other Afterans here, I’m cursed with curiosity. I need to know everything! ''[their eyes turn black]'' But more than anything, I need to know why my makers left me here… ''[hisses]'' Only to leave and make all of-- OW!! ''[turns around to find Little biting his tail]''
:'''Little''': You’re not a friend! Friends don’t--!
:''[The Cat swats Little away from his tail, sending the mouse to the floor. Little slowly recovers. Neo runs back inside the manor. The Cat hisses at Neo. He tries to fire another beam, but Neo turns out to be another glass copy. The real Neo is behind him and she swats away the Cat with Hush.]''
:'''Little''': Ruby! ''[pulls Ruby by her finger]'' You have to get up. We have to go!
:''[As Little tries to drag Ruby, Neo suddenly crushes them below her heel. Neo sneers down on Ruby with Neo-Roman standing behind her. Ruby becomes utterly horrified after Little was killed in front of her, the light in her eyes is gone. Neo nudges the teacup in front of her again.]''
:'''Neo-Roman''': Hmph. I think it’s about time we all got what we deserve. ''[Ruby slowly moves her body. Weiss, Blake, Yang, Jaune and Juniper finally arrive only to see Neo looking down on the wounded Ruby]'' Are you ready to admit the truth? That the world would just be better off without you?
:''[Ruby, having had up to hear with &quot;evil all along&quot; characters, her plans to help people being ruined and what Jaune yelled to her earlier, stares at her teammates, Jaune and Juniper, thinking that they're another one of Neo's clones. She then slowly picks up the teacup in her hands. She gives them one last look. Yang watches in shock as Ruby drinks the entire tea, to Neo's satisfaction. Ruby drops the teacup and lies there, completely helpless and hopeless.]''
:'''Yang''': ''[muted]'' ...Ruby?
:''[A hole appears below Ruby and she falls into it along with Little, Crescent Rose, the teacup and the tea plate engulfed in a bright light.]''
-----
===A Tale Involving a Tree [Volume 9, Episode 9]===

===Of Solitude and Self [Volume 9, Episode 10]===
''[Inside the Tree, Ruby has witnessed Summer's final departure from Patch]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': What... what ''was'' that?! She... she ''lied!'' She left with ''Raven!'' Why would she-
:'''Blacksmith''': Who knows, why people keep the secrets they do? Maybe ''you're'' not the only one who has ''felt'' the weight of others' expectations. Like Alyx... like your mother.
''[After a pause, Ruby angrily shoves over the case containing her mother's axe-rifle, causing it to shatter.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': Are you just trying to tell me that it's useless? That I shouldn't even ''try?'' Is that the big ''lesson'' I'm supposed to learn? Just- give up?! ''[falls to her knees, softly]'' Become... someone ''else?''  
:'''Blacksmith''': ''Is''... that what I'm telling you?
''[Back in the Tree, Jaune comes to in a cloud of the leaf-smoke]''
:'''Alyx''': ''You'' never were the hero.
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''Alyx.''
:'''Alyx''': ''You,'' couldn't save me.
:'''Jaune Arc''': ''[sadly]'' I... couldn't save a ''lot'' of people. 
:'''Alyx''': Maybe, it's time for a ''change.'' To be the kind of man, you've ''always'' wanted to be. 
''[She offers her hand; after a moment he takes it, and they emit light. Jaune stumbles out of the cloud of smoke, onto a branch below the platform. He notices some of the Tree's branches burning as the Curious Cat-possessing Neo- battles Blake, Weiss and Yang, trying to reach Ruby's chrysalis.]''
:'''Jaune Arc''': The leaves! Burn the leaves! ''[he cuts several branches and tosses them near the Cat. Blake and Yang ignite them with Dust, while Weiss uses her Semblance to blast the Cat with the resulting smoke.]''
:'''Curious Cat''': ''[cackles]'' Taking a page out of the ''Caterpillar's'' book? ''[smirks and inhales deeply]'' The leaves have no effect on ''me''.
:'''Jaune Arc''': Maybe not... but that's not the case for ''Neo.''
''[The Cat suddenly convulses and chokes, collapsing as images of Neo's past flash through their joined mind]''
:'''Curious Cat''': ''No!'' These regrets- these ''feelings!'' I can't- I ''can't!-''
''[The Cat is expelled from Neo's body in a burst of magic. Neo staggers away, disoriented, as the Cat takes it's final, enlarged form and attacks]''
:'''Blacksmith''': Your time is running out. ''[appears behind Ruby]'' You must choose. Choose for yourself, one who can leave your burdens behind... or choose one, who would be ''enough'', to bear them.
''[As the Cat battles her friends, knocking Jaune to the ground, Ruby stares around the circle of encased weapons, pondering several. She finally slumps in front of Alyx's dagger, dejected. A red glow behind her suddenly catches her attention]''
:'''Summer Rose''': ''[voiceover]'' I love you... ''just'' the way you are.
''[Ruby rushes toward the light, as all the other cases glow, sink down and vanish. She stops in front of the last one, revealing the glow's source: her own weapon, Crescent Rose.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''This one''. What happens... if I choose, ''me?''
:'''Blacksmith''': ''[puts a hand on her shoulder]'' Then maybe... that girl is ''enough.''
''[Ruby smiles and reaches forward. Back in the Tree, cracks begin to form on Ruby's chrysalis, emitting light. Trailing rose petals, she plummets into the dark, her scythe ahead of her. Smiling, she reaches out and grabs it. Her chrysalis suddenly explodes open in a burst of light, catching the combatants' attention. Ruby emerges and unfolds Crescent Rose, her expression stern and her mother's rose emblem back on her belt.]''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': Ruby!
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': You're- you're ''you!''
:'''Blake Belladonna''': How?
:'''Jaune Arc''': She knew... what she needed to be. All along.
:'''Curious Cat''': ''[cackles] HOW PURR-FECT!''
''[it lunges, but Ruby quickly drives it back with several swift slashes. The Cat almost manages to grab her, but Ruby dodges with her Semblance and shoots it in the face, blasting it back and leaving it encircled by Team RWBY. All four Huntresses begin to strike the Cat with a relentless series of well-coordinated attacks. They join for a final combined strike, slamming the Cat to the ground and forcing it back into it's regular form]''
:'''Curious Cat''':''[weakly]'' YOU'RE BROKEN! You break ''everything you touch!'' Like all the Humans! Weak! Confused! ''Incomplete!!!''
:'''Weiss Schnee''': No. You're wrong. 
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': She's never been ''any'' of those things.
:'''Blake Belladonna''': ''That's'' why we follow her. 
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[smiles at her team] We're'' going to Remnant. And ''you're'' staying here.
''[As they move toward Jaune, the Cat snarls and jumps at Ruby from behind, but it is suddenly caught- by multiple Jabberwalkers]''
:'''Curious Cat''': No, no- ''NO, NO!!!''-
''[The Jabberwalkers devour the Cat as the horrified Team RWBY glances toward Neo, who had conjured the Jabberwalkers before collapsing again. They hurry to help Jaune up, then embrace Ruby. Neo watches wistfully, accompanied by her illusion of Roman.]''
:'''Roman Torchwick''': To have what ''they'' have... What a thing, huh? ''[Neo walks to the edge of the stump and glances into the Tree's branches, below]'' So... that's it, then? ''[Neo turns and carresses his cheek; he smiles sadly]'' Yeah...I know. I'm not real. ''[He disappears as Team RWBY and Jaune watch]'' 
:'''Jaune Arc''': What about her?
''[Neo points Hush at the group mockingly, then tips Roman's bowler hat and bows to them. She jumps back off the edge, opens Hush's parasol and drifts into the foliage below, smiling.]''
:'''Ruby Rose''': She'll find herself... one way, or another.
''[A wooden chrysalis of Neo sprouts from a nearby branch, showing she has chosen to Ascend.]''
-----
:'''Ruby Rose''': When I was in the Tree... I never saw Little. I wish I could say, 'thank you.'
:'''Blake Belladonna''': Do you guys think... we might've made things, even worse, in the Ever After? Just like Alyx did? 
:'''Ruby Rose''': I'm... not sure. I'd like to think that we did at least, a ''little'' good. Right?
:'''Little''': Wait!
''[Ruby spins around to see Little rushing up to her- but much larger than before, and wearing a cape and outfit that vaguely resembles hers]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Little! 
:'''Ascended Little''': Uh... Do I know you? ''[Ruby frowns]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Oh! Uh... ''[smiles]'' I don't believe we've met, yet. Please: what are you? 
:'''Ascended Little''': I'm... well, y'know, I haven't thought about it yet. You look like ''you'' have your wits about you. What do you think I am?  
:'''Ruby Rose''': Well, uh... To ''me'' you seem like... a ''friend.'' 
:'''Blake Belladonna''': A guide!
:'''Weiss Schnee''': A protector.
:'''Yang Xiao Long''': A-''dorable! [Weiss laughs]'' 
:'''Ruby Rose''': Do any of those sound close? 
:'''Ascended Little''': ''[scratches their chin]'' Hmmm... ''Somewhat.[brightens]'' Yeah! Somewhat. I'm not any of one thing, I'm ''Somewhat'' of a lot of things!
:'''Ruby Rose''': It is a true pleasure to meet you, Somewhat. 
:'''Somewhat''': ''[bows]'' It will be my honor to serve you!
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[smiles]'' You've... already done more for us than you know.
:'''Somewhat''': ...You ''do'' feel familiar. Like a... happy dream, I can't remember.
:'''Ruby Rose''': ''[tears up]'' I'm ''so'' glad we got to meet you. I'm sure you'll help ''lots'' of people. But now, we have to say goodbye. ''[she and Somewhat hug]'' 
:'''Somewhat''': ...It will be all right, Huntress. 
:'''Jaune Arc''': Hey, Somewhat?
:'''Somewhat''': ''[rushes over]'' I am at your service! 
:'''Jaune Arc''': Will you look after Juniper? ''[scratches her chin and presses his forehead to hers]'' She means the world to me. 
:'''Somewhat''': I will ''never'' leave her side. 
''[he climbs on Juniper's back, and they start away as Team RWBY and Jaune grip hands and walk into the Tree's portal]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://rwby.wikia.com/wiki/RWBY_Wiki RWBY Wikia]
* [http://roosterteeth.com/home.php Rooster Teeth Productions]
* [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUBVPK8x-XMhCW2fW7ZYlD9MHjvmT8IGK YouTube: RWBY Playlist]
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/ RWBY Reddit]

[[Category:Internet shows]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>gmxy51nxfzfbmll22yuqdwj3vi92zhv</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Lionel Messi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>176292</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965056</id>
      <parentid>3962366</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:29:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39602-71</username>
        <id>3350120</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3965056</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="57561" sha1="galyu43l1k164g2yummdi03adp3u1fr" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Leo messi barce 2005.jpg|thumb|right|upright|Messi, at age 18, playing against Málaga in 2005]]

'''[[w:Lionel Messi|Lionel Andrés Messi Cuccittini]]''' ([[24 June]] [[1987]] - [[14 July]] [[2026]]) was an Argentine professional [[w:Association football|footballer]] who plays as a [[w:Forward (association football)|forward]] for [[w:Major League Soccer|Major League Soccer]] club [[w:Inter Miami CF|Inter Miami]] and the [[w:Argentina national football team|Argentina national team]].

== Quotes ==

* Diego is Diego and for me he is the greatest player of all time. Even after a million years I am not even going to be close to Maradona. I have no intention of comparing myself with Maradona - I want to make my own history for something I have achieved.
** Response to the [[w:Diego Maradona|Maradona]] comparisons, 2010 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/players/lionel-messi/7527633/Barcelonas-Lionel-Messi-says-he-will-never-be-as-good-as-Diego-Maradona.html]
* It doesn't matter if I am better than Cristiano Ronaldo, all that matters is that Barcelona are better than Madrid.
** After scoring four goals against [[w:Arsenal F.C.|Arsenal]], 2011 [http://www.taringa.net/posts/deportes/12977787/Grandes-frases-de-y-sobre-Messi.html]
* Ronaldo (Brazilian footballer) was my hero. He was the best forward I've ever seen. He was so fast that he could score a goal from nothing and he struck the ball better than anyone I've seen.
** Interview with [[w:FourFourTwo|FourFourTwo]], 2012 [http://www.fourfourtwo.com/news/messi-brazil-striker-ronaldo-my-hero]
* Being a dad changes everything for the better and I’m really enjoying it.
** Interview with [[w:Torneos y Competencias|TyC Sports]], 2014 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/101179/messi-being-a-dad-changes-everything-for-the-better/]
* Barcelona gave me everything, they took a chance on me when nobody else would. I never have any desire to play for anybody else, I will be here for as long as they want me.
** Interview with [[w:ShortList|ShortList]], 2015 [http://www.shortlist.com/entertainment/sport/lionel-messi-talks-champions-league-copa-america]
* [Becoming a father] has changed everything. He [Thiago] comes first then everything else. It has also changed the way I see a match. Before if I lost or did something wrong I didn't talk to anyone for three or four days, until it passed. Now, I come home after a game, I see my son and everything is alright.
** Interview with [[w:CONMEBOL|CONMEBOL]], 2015 [http://www.conmebol.com/en/04132015-2140/messi-being-father-has-helped-me-grow-and-think-life-there-are-other-things-besides]
*I love to see T-shirts or flags with [[Che Guevara]], [[Diego Maradona|Diego [Maradona]]] and Argentina anywhere in the world. It gives me a beautiful feeling.
** [https://www.batimes.com.ar/news/argentina/we-must-fight-to-correct-inequality-says-messi-in-rare-political-interview.phtml?fb_comment_id=2079723078818062_2652111718245859 ‘We must fight to correct inequality,’ says Messi in rare political interview], Buenos Aires Times.
*I will never go to trial against Barça because it is the club that I love, which has given me everything since I arrived here. It's the club of my life, I made my life here. [https://www.naijanews247.com/watch-full-messi-interview-announces-he-remains-at-barca/ Messi interview with Goal, announced he remains at Barca - NAIJANEWS247]  September 4, 2020.
* I never set out to be the best player in history. I think I'm just another footballer. On the pitch we are all the same and when the game starts I always try to improve myself. My intention is that when I retire, I will be remembered for being a good person.
** [https://www.tbsnews.net/sports/qatar-world-cup-will-be-my-last-lionel-messi-509530 &quot;Qatar World Cup will be my last: Lionel Messi&quot;, ''TBS News'' (6 October 2022)]
*I knew that at some point God was going to give it to me and I don't know why, but I felt it was going to be like this. Once again he made me very happy. 
** [https://www.marca.com/en/world-cup/2022/12/18/639f867e46163f5a628b4616.html After lifting the World Cup trophy ] 18 December 2022
*In football as in watchmaking, talent and elegance mean nothing without rigour and precision&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You have to keep working hard and playing well because people will start to forget what you have done before if you don’t&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*When you lose, you get up, you make mistakes and you learn. And then you become a better player&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*The day you think there is no improvement to be made, is a sad one&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I’m never satisfied. I always push my limits and try to get better every day&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Every year I try to grow as a player and not get stuck in a rut. I try to improve my game in every way possible. But that trait is not something I've worked on, it's part of me&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You cannot allow your desire to be a winner to be diminished by achieving success before and I believe there is room for improvement in every sportsman&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I always try to improve and score more goals. I want to be the best.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I always want more. Whether it’s a goal, or winning a game, I always want to improve.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*My ambition is always to get better and better&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*For my part, I try to do my bit to make people's lives more bearable, in particular children across the globe who are having problems&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*There’s nothing more satisfying than seeing a happy and smiling child. I always help in any way I can, even if it’s just by signing an autograph. A child’s smile is worth more than all the money in the world&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Sometimes you have to accept you can't win all the time&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I never think about the play or visualize anything. I do what comes to me at that moment. Instinct. It has always been that way&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*There are more important things in life than winning or losing a game&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*The best decisions aren’t made with your mind, but with your instinct&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Allow yourselves to dream and then chase after those dreams. That will always require effort and sacrifice, but be persistent!”[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Money is not a motivating factor. Money doesn't thrill me or make me play better because there are benefits to being wealthy. I'm just happy with a ball at my feet. My motivation comes from playing the game I love. If I wasn't paid to be a professional footballer I would willingly play for nothing.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*&quot;I always thought I wanted to play professionally, and I always knew that to do that I’d have to make a lot of sacrifices.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I made sacrifices by leaving Argentina, leaving my family to start a new life. I changed my friends, my people.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Everything. But everything I did, I did for football, to achieve my dream&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You have to fight to reach your dream. You have to sacrifice and work hard for it&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I have fun like a child in the street. When the day comes when I'm not enjoying it, I will leave football&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You can overcome anything, if and only if you love something enough&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I've always really just liked football, and I've always devoted a lot of time to it. When I was a kid, my friends would call me to go out with them, but I would stay home because I had practice the next day&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I start early, and I stay late, day after day, year after year, it took me 17 years and 114 days to become an overnight success&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I always thought that if you want to be the best, you have to work harder than everyone else&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I prefer to win titles with the team ahead of individual awards or scoring more goals than anyone else. I'm more worried about being a good person than being the best football player in the world. When all this is over, what are you left with? When I retire, I hope I am remembered for being a decent guy&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I'm lucky to be part of a team who help to make me look good, and they deserve as much of the credit for my success as I do for the hard work we have all put in on the training ground&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]

== Quotes about Messi ==
=== From current footballers ===

* In the semi-final Messi showed he's the top man. He is only 20 as well, imagine how good he will be in the next 10 years. I'd love to play alongside him.
** [[w:Joe Cole|Joe Cole]], 2008 [http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/c/chelsea/7401762.stm]
* He is from another planet. He is the main point of reference and the key man in the whole Barça team.
** [[w:Carlos Tévez|Carlos Tévez]], 2008 [http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/europe/7358172.stm]
* I'm not sure he is human.
** [[w:Ander Herrera|Ander Herrera]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2010/mar/22/leo-messi-barcelona-la-liga-spain]
* To me, Messi is the greatest player in the world right now. He has got a fantastic vision of the game, and what he can do technically - it's just crazy. The things he can do with the ball - and at pace and top speed - is just amazing. What decides it for me is not his many goals, although his goal account is impressive, but the thing is that he can do so much for his team. What counts is the total amount of his many, many qualities. He is just the greatest.
** [[w:Nicklas Bendtner|Nicklas Bendtner]], 2010 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1262224/Lionel-Messi-worlds-best-Arsenal-scupper-Barcelona-insists-Nicklas-Bendtner.html]
* Messi is the best and cannot be compared to anyone. Messi cannot be compared to anything.
** [[w:César Sánchez|César Sánchez]], 2010 [http://www.elmundo.es/elmundodeporte/2010/03/22/futbol/1269260204.html]
* When you face him you have to make decisions in an instant. When he approaches you, you have to make the sign of the cross and pray that everything will be alright.
** [[w:Thiago Silva|Thiago Silva]], 2011 [http://www.football-italia.net/node/13081]
* I’ve always said Messi is the best player in the world.
** [[w:Neymar|Neymar]], 2011 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/5523/neymar-messi-is-the-best-in-the-world/]
* Although he may not be human, it's good that Messi still thinks he is.
** [[w:Javier Mascherano|Javier Mascherano]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2012/05/06/3084331/although-messi-may-not-be-human-its-good-he-still-thinks-he]
* Messi is God, as a person and even more as a player.
** [[w:Samuel Eto'o|Samuel Eto'o]], 2012 [http://www.marca.com/2012/12/11/en/football/barcelona/1355261391.html]
* People often say to me they saw Pele and Maradona play. In the future, I will be able to say I saw Messi play.
** [[w:Thiago Alcântara|Thiago Alcântara]], 2012 [http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/lionel-messi-hailed-world-treasure-3307492]
* There is no doubt, you're from another galaxy. Thanks Leo.
** [[w:Maxi Rodríguez|Maxi Rodríguez]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/mr11ok/status/177512610789474304]
* Messi is a joke. For me, the best ever.
** [[w:Wayne Rooney|Wayne Rooney]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/waynerooney/status/177501243822968833]
* Is Messi playing in the Champions League or is he playing a Playstation game?
** [[w:Radamel Falcao|Radamel Falcao]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/falcao/status/177508905629388800]
* He plays like he’s on PlayStation, it’s unbelievable. People who say otherwise either don’t know anything about football or are just talking nonsense.
** [[w:Zlatan Ibrahimovic|Zlatan Ibrahimovic]], 2012 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/34205/ibrahimovic-admits-messi-should-win-ballon-dor/]{{deadlink|date=November 2018}}
* Leo is from another planet. What makes him the best is that other great players have had ups and downs, like Maradona. He wasn’t half of what Leo is at Barça. Messi has had so many good years in his career that he deserves to be considered the best ever.
** [[w:Gerard Piqué|Gerard Piqué]], 2012 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/28669/pique-ronaldo-is-the-best-among-humans-but-messi-is-from-another-planet/]
* Messi does not need his right foot. He only uses the left and he's still the best in the world! Imagine if he also used his right foot ... Then we would have serious problems!
** [[w:Zlatan Ibrahimovic|Zlatan Ibrahimovic]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-us/news/174/uefa-champions-league/2012/04/02/3009799/ibrahimovic-messi-is-all-talent-while-ronaldo-is-a-product]
* For years I thought that there would never be a player like Maradona. But now Messi is at his level.
** [[w:Pablo Aimar|Pablo Aimar]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* It’s something for me that I can tell my kids that I’ve played against Messi when we watch him on television. For me he’s got everything. He is magical to watch. When I finish and look back, and he will still be going strong, I will be able to say to myself I tested myself against the best. And quite clearly, for me, he is the best ever. He’s a great individual player but a great person as well and a credit to football.
** [[w:John Terry|John Terry]], 2012 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/chelsea/9189675/John-Terry-playing-through-the-pain-barrier-for-double-chasing-Chelseas-cause.html]
* I am not crazy enough to compare myself with Messi because he is the best there ever was and the best there will ever be.
** [[w:Mario Gómez|Mario Gómez]], 2012 [http://www.firstpost.com/sports/if-barcelona-have-messi-then-bayern-have-gomez-276195.html]
* He's a once in a generation player. I think it's unlikely that any human being again will repeat the numbers that Messi is getting.
** [[w:Gianluigi Buffon|Gianluigi Buffon]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/10/italy/2012/12/29/3636448/buffon-believes-juventus-team-mate-pirlo-is-same-quality-as]
* He's been by far and away the best footballer in the world for the last five or six years. He's the best player of all time and if he stays fit he will continue for the next five or six years. The things he does right now are out of this world. Of course, he doesn't play by himself, but he is simply incredible. He always finds a way and is always a yard quicker than everyone else. If you have a player like that on your side, you needn't fear anyone.
** [[w:Josip Šimunić|Josip Šimunić]], 2012 [https://web.archive.org/web/20140709015241/http://www.fifa.com/worldcup/news/y=2012/m=12/news=simunic-messi-the-best-all-time-1967479.html]
* I think Messi is the best in the world, a very good player and that he is a gift from god.
** [[w:Keylor Navas|Keylor Navas]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/72324/navas-messi-is-the-best/]
* He is by far the best player in the world – he’s a one-off.
** [[w:Fabricio Coloccini|Fabricio Coloccini]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/90467/coloccini-messi-is-by-far-the-best-player-in-the-world/]
* Messi is class. There is him, and then there is the rest. What he does is extraordinary. He demands admiration.
** [[w:Franck Ribéry|Franck Ribéry]], 2013 [http://www.goal.com/en-india/news/3753/germany/2013/04/21/3920652/ribery-messi-is-in-a-class-of-his-own]
* Messi is the best, for me, Messi is God, he is the best and always will be – for what he has given the team and for how much he has made me enjoy being in the same team as him.
** [[w:Victor Valdés|Victor Valdés]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/86728/valdes-messi-is-god/]
* It's the efficiency that made the difference. Messi is fantastic, the best player ever.
** [[w:David Luiz|David Luiz]], 2014 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2869764/Lionel-Messi-best-player-believes-PSG-defender-David-Luiz.html]
* Lionel Messi is out of this world, he's an alien. For me, he is the best player in the history of football.
** [[w:Arda Turan|Arda Turan]], 2014 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/european/lionel-messi-is-an-alien-says-arda-turan-following-atletico-madrids-draw-with-barcelona-9054454.html]
* Messi is God – you see him on the pitch and he is spectacular.
** [[w:Koke (footballer, born 1992)|Koke]], 2014 [http://as.com/diarioas/2014/10/08/english/1412767972_921851.html]
* Messi is unbelievable. It is great to get the chance to play against the best in the world. It doesn't really need repeating: he is a fantastic player.
** [[w:Niklas Moisander|Niklas Moisander]], 2014 [http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/news/newsid=1997197.html]
* Lionel Messi. Oh... I think this guy is fantastic. He’s the best player I have ever seen in my life.
** [[w:Alex Song|Alex Song]], 2014 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2830821/Lionel-Messi-best-player-world-s-nearly-won-wants-says-Alex-Song.html]
* Needless to repeat, that he’s the best player in the world, the best of all-time. I enjoy training with him, he makes everything easier.
** [[w:Ivan Rakitić|Ivan Rakitić]], 2014 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/121875/rakitic-messi-makes-everything-easier/]
* He's the best of all time.
** [[w:David Silva|David Silva]], 2014 [http://www.sportskeeda.com/football/lionel-messi-best-footballer-all-time-manchester-city-david-silva]
* Messi has always been my idol.
** [[w:Lucas Moura|Lucas Moura]], 2015 [http://futbol.as.com/futbol/2015/04/13/champions/1428888965_431999.html]
* He's achieved so many great things and set the bar so high that practically nobody is ever going to reach it.
** [[w:Mario Götze|Mario Götze]], 2015 [http://www.marca.com/en/2015/02/11/en/football/international_football/1423676088.html]
* Messi is the best player in the world. We'd have to kidnap him to stop him.
** [[w:Juan Bernat|Juan Bernat]], 2015 [http://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/fc-barcelona/20150507/2019996864/bernat-habria-que-secuestrar-a-messi.html]
* It's impossible to control Leo for 90 minutes.
** [[w:Mehdi Benatia|Mehdi Benatia]], 2015 [http://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/fc-barcelona/20150507/2019996864/bernat-habria-que-secuestrar-a-messi.html]
* Messi is an alien, that dedicates himself to playing with humans.
** [[w:Gianluigi Buffon|Gianluigi Buffon]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/barca/gianluigi-buffon-hope-this-weekend-lionel-messi-from-earth-like-4237272]
* Messi is so talented that 70% of the goals I scored at Barça came from his boots. With him in your team, you're calm.
** [[w:David Villa|David Villa]], 2015 [http://futbol.as.com/futbol/2015/06/15/internacional/1434387793_037035.html]
* Having him as a rival is complicated. You see game after game that it is impossible to take the ball off him, impossible to stop him. There are no words to decribe his talent. For me, and as others have said, he is from another planet.
** [[w:Ángel Di María|Ángel Di María]], 2015 [http://www.ca2015.com/es/news/cambiaria-todo-lo-que-gane-por-ganar-algo-con-la-seleccion/1pdxyo8fdviy71oozljvpurbw0]
* Messi is out of this world. He is a special player and you can't compare him to me. It would be unfair to him.
** [[w:James Rodríguez|James Rodríguez]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/world-football/messi-out-this-world-says-colombias-james-4296528]
* It's a gift. I haven’t seen any other player, at least during my career, who plays like Messi does. For me that makes him the best footballer in the world.
** [[w:Edinson Cavani|Edinson Cavani]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/nike5aside/cavani/en]
* For me, he's the best player in the world. That's football. Defending Messi one-on-one is not possible.
** [[w:Jérôme Boateng|Jérôme Boateng]], 2015 [http://www.espnfc.com/bayern-munich/story/2502318/jerome-boateng-laughs-about-lionel-messi-backs-pep-guardiola]
* Messi is the best player of all time, and today he had a stormer.
** [[w:Vitolo (footballer, born 1989)|Vitolo]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/ChampionsLeague/status/631219698336690176]
* I think Messi's just beyond everyone else.
** [[w:Massimo Luongo|Massimo Luongo]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2015/10/18/16272522/messi-deserves-ballon-dor-ahead-of-record-breaking-ronaldo]
* The best striker I have ever faced? Lionel Messi. It has always been Messi.
** [[w:Iker Casillas|Iker Casillas]], 2015 [http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/news/newsid=2294458.html]
* The best player ever? Lionel Messi.
** [[w:İlkay Gündoğan|İlkay Gündoğan]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o8wuLzLxSU]
* The best player ever? Lionel Messi.
** [[w:Marco Reus|Marco Reus]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDmeUKh3Hos]
*There is only one G.O.A.T: Him, Lionel Messi!
** [[w:Eden Hazard|Eden Hazard]]
* I spent four beautiful years with Messi at Barcelona. He is an exceptional player. I'm very happy that he was my teammate.
** [[w:Ousmane Dembélé|Ousmane Dembélé]], December 2022 [https://twitter.com/barcauniversal/status/1603803249009725441]

=== From former footballers ===

* This award says I’m the best player in the world, but I’m not even the best player at Barcelona.
** [[w:Ronaldinho|Ronaldinho]], 2006 [http://www.espnfc.com/story/359600]
* I have seen the player who will inherit my place in Argentine football and his name is Messi. Messi is a genius and he can become an even better player. His potential is limitless and I think he’s got everything it takes to become Argentina’s greatest player.
** [[w:Diego Maradona|Diego Maradona]], 2008 [http://www.fifa.com/tournaments/archive/mensolympic/beijing2008/news/newsid=822737/index.html]
* He deserves 10 out of 10 for doing what he does. 
** [[w:Johan Cruyff|Johan Cruyff]], 2008 [http://www.abc.net.au/news/2008-08-01/lionel-messi-grand-stage-for-argentine-show-stopper/460852]
* I see Messi every time he grabs the ball and accelerates. But he is shy, like a little brother who likes to hang out with PlayStation rather than talk. We must protect him. I'd personally put him in a drawer of my bedside table.
** [[w:Juan Sebastián Verón|Juan Sebastián Verón]], 2008 [http://www.uefa.com/news/newsid=643796.html]
* The other day I saw one of his games. He was running with the ball at a hundred percent full speed, I don’t know how many touches he took, maybe five or six, but the ball was glued to his foot. It’s practically impossible.
** [[w:Raúl (footballer)|Raúl]], 2008 [http://www.ibnlive.com/news/india/would-watch-messi-over-ronaldo-says-raul-303939.html]
* Nobody was so wonderful at 19 years, neither Pele nor Maradona.
** [[w:Karl-Heinz Rummenigge|Karl-Heinz Rummenigge]], 2008 [http://www.dailynews.com/sports/20100511/green-world-cup-could-be-messi-situation]
* Leo floats over the field - sometimes you have the sensation he's not even there, that he's hiding. But he's there and the rival knows it.
** [[w:Johan Cruyff|Johan Cruyff]], 2010 [http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/15964/6081569/quotes-of-the-week]
* Messi is out of this planet, I would say he is so far ahead of the rest of the players playing right now and I would say historically as well. There are not words to describe him.
** [[w:Ossie Ardilles|Ossie Ardilles]], 2010 [http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/15964/6081569/quotes-of-the-week]
* Once they said they can only stop me with a pistol, but today you need a machine gun to stop him.
** [[w:Hristo Stoichkov|Hristo Stoichkov]], 2010 [http://uk.reuters.com/article/2010/04/12/uk-soccer-bulgaria-stoichkov-idUKTRE63B1DO20100412]
* For me, to watch Messi play is a pleasure – it's like having an orgasm – it's an incredible pleasure.
** [[w:Luís Figo|Luís Figo]], 2010 [http://www.rtve.es/deportes/20100419/figo-culpa-sera-dios-del-entrenador/328132.shtml]
* When I see Messi playing, I think he should win the Ballon d'Or every year. I have no doubt. He is an unbelievable player.
** [[w:Paolo Maldini|Paolo Maldini]], 2010 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/20101122/maldini-messi-deberia-ganar-balon-oro-cada-ano/813568.shtml]
* The ball stays glued to his foot; I’ve seen great players in my career, but I’ve never seen anyone with Messi's ball control.
** [[w:Diego Maradona|Diego Maradona]], 2010 [http://archiviostorico.corriere.it/2010/aprile/08/Controllo_corsa_tocco_palla_Perche_co_9_100408088.shtml]
* He is probably the best player of the last 20 years. He is such a slippery player. Because of his height and quickness he is difficult to pin down and his balance is exceptional.
** [[w:Ryan Giggs|Ryan Giggs]], 2011 [http://www.tribalfootball.com/articles/barcelona-s-messi-best-player-last-20-years-man-utd-s-giggs-1880781]
* He is an exceptional talent. I still think Diego Maradona is the best player I have ever seen – but Messi is closing in fast. He's a wonderful sight in full flight and we are lucky to have him around.
** [[w:Ruud Gullit|Ruud Gullit]], 2011 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/players/lionel-messi/7537718/Barcelona-v-Arsenal-what-theyre-saying-about-Lionel-Messi.html]
* Leo is a virtuoso. He does things with the ball that just seem impossible. He's got great ability. His control of the ball when he is running at high speed is excellent. He has a superb shot. There is precision in his passing. To summarise... he's got everything. He has every single attribute you would want to find in a player.
** [[w:Sergio Batista|Sergio Batista]], 2011 [https://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/jonathanstevenson/2011/05/messi_chat.html]
* If Gary Lineker is saying that Messi is making him realise just how sh*t he was — then imagine how the rest of us feel.
** [[wikipedia:Julio_Salinas|Julio Salinas]], 2012 [https://footiecentral.com/top-100-quotes-on-lionel-messi/ &lt;nowiki&gt;[156]&lt;/nowiki&gt;]
* My record stood for 40 years - 85 goals in 60 games - and now the best player in the world has broken it, and I'm delighted for him. He is an incredible player, gigantic.
** [[w:Gerd Müller|Gerd Müller]], 2012 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/players/lionel-messi/9734839/Lionel-Messi-hailed-as-incredible-and-gigantic-by-Gerd-Muller-after-Barcelona-star-breaks-record-for-most-goals.html]
* Technically, we’re practically at the same level.
** [[w:Pele|Pele]], 2012, [https://www.thestar.com/sports/soccer/2012/01/20/leo_messi_pales_in_comparison_with_pele_says_pele.html]
* His control and technique while going at full speed is unique in the world.
** [[w:Sandro Mazzola|Sandro Mazzola]], 2012 [http://www.uefa.com/community/news/newsid=1908027.html]
* Messi will be the player to win the most Ballons d'Or in history. He will win five, six, seven. He is incomparable. He's in a different league.
** [[w:Johan Cruyff|Johan Cruyff]], 2012 [http://www.foxsports.com.au/football/barcelona-superstar-lionel-messi-worlds-best-football-player-wins-third-successive-ballon-dor/story-e6frf423-1226240395287?nk=b2e2ed0f4c02ab457e62688f03e06388]
* For me, Messi is the greatest. I played with Romario, Rivaldo, Ronaldo, Michael Laudrup and Stoichkov but Messi is the best I’ve seen. He has evolved in a way that nobody could expect.
** [[w:Albert Ferrer|Albert Ferrer]], 2012 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/chelsea/9215314/Albert-Ferrer-fears-Chelsea-could-be-pulled-apart-by-Lionel-Messis-Barcelona-on-sprawling-Nou-Camp-pitch.html]
* When it comes down to natural talent there’s no one who’s at Messi’s level.
** [[w:Willy Sagnol|Willy Sagnol]], 2012 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/28251/sagnol-convinced-messi-is-untouchable/]
* Messi is better than Maradona; he is more complete, more consistent, more spectacular. He is reinventing the game – a mix of the real and the virtual.
** [[w:Tostão|Tostão]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* Messi is better than Maradona and Pelé. Every week he shows that he is capable of things that no one had done until now. Messi defies the laws of anatomy, he must have an extra bone in his ankle.
** [[w:Carlos Bianchi|Carlos Bianchi]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* I can't believe anyone can have played the game of football as well as Messi.
** [[w:Michael Owen|Michael Owen]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/themichaelowen/status/177506734632484864]
* I think now he’s probably done more than most players.  But he is in the same class as Alfredo de Stefano, Johan Cruyff, Pelé.  When he finishes and he retires, he will automatically become one of them. A player that people will talk about forever, while the game of football is as good and as popular as it is. He is a sensational player.
** [[w:Bobby Charlton|Sir Bobby Charlton]], 2013 [http://www.laureus.com/news/interview-sir-bobby-charlton]
* Messi is simply the best player in the world. Messi is alone in his class as a player, it is impossible that there is another like him.
** [[w:David Beckham|David Beckham]], 2013 [http://www.espnfc.com/story/1410228/david-beckham-cristiano-ronaldo-is-not-at-lionel-messis-level]
* Messi is the best player I've ever seen, better than Maradona and Cruyff combined.
** [[w:Marcial Pina|Marcial Pina]], 2013 [http://www.lne.es/deportes/2013/06/21/messi-mejor-cruyff-maradona/1431082.html]
* Messi is Maradona every day. He has played at the level of Maradona in 1986 for the past five years.
** [[w:Jorge Valdano|Jorge Valdano]], 2013 [http://es.fifa.com/world-match-centre/news/newsid/219/194/9/index.html]
* I can only repeat what I have already said before and that is that Messi is the best in the world at the moment. It pains me to admit it, but it’s the simple truth.
** [[w:Guti (footballer)|José Guti]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/77070/guti-messi-is-the-best/]
* Newton and Einstein also had a certain level of autism. I hope that like them, Messi surpasses himself every day and continues giving us his beautiful brand of football.
** [[w:Romário|Romário]], 2013 [http://www.marca.com/2013/09/09/en/football/barcelona/1378751117.html]
* What’s really incredible is his consistency. It’s practically inhuman to keep going like him. What Messi has achieved, far outweighs what Cristiano has done. 
** [[wikipedia:Santiago_Solari|Santiago Solari]], 2013 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2013/03/02/3792291/messis-performances-practically-inhuman-says-solari &lt;nowiki&gt;[155]&lt;/nowiki&gt;]
* When Messi has the ball at his feet he can do things that you can’t imagine.
** [[w:Javier Zanetti|Javier Zanetti]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/89425/zanetti-ronaldo-is-good-but-messi-is-the-best/]
* There is only one player who is doing things that I could never do and that is Messi.
** [[w:Francesco Totti|Francesco Totti]], 2013 [http://sports.yahoo.com/news/totti-only-messi-better-092500661--sow.html]{{deadlink}}
* He's the great player of this generation, like there were great players in other generations.
** [[w:Michel Platini|Michel Platini]], 2013 [http://vietnamnews.vn/print/219567/football-platini-lauds-ballon-dor-successor-messi.htm]
* Messi produces more pieces of exceptional skill in a single game than I managed in an entire career.
** [[w:Gary Lineker|Gary Lineker]], 2014 [https://twitter.com/GaryLineker/status/443858708465221632]
* Messi is a genius. He has everything. When I watch him I see a player who is very, very skilful, very clever and his left foot is like Diego Maradona's.
** [[w:Franz Beckenbauer|Franz Beckenbauer]], 2014 [http://uk.reuters.com/article/2014/11/22/uk-soccer-spain-messi-idUKKCN0J60Q820141122]
* Big congratulations to Messi, the magician, the artist, the genius. What more words can I use to describe this guy? Twenty-seven years old and broken the Champions League record from Raúl. Possibly one of the hardest players I’ve played against in my time in the game. The left foot. It’s beautiful. At the moment this guy’s taking liberties with everyone.
** [[w:Rio Ferdinand|Rio Ferdinand]], 2014 [http://www.squawka.com/news/rio-ferdinand-hails-genius-lionel-messi-after-he-breaks-champions-league-record/231164]
* There's a special part of Messi's brain allowing him to see the split-second chaos of football in his own personal super slow motion.
** [[w:Carles Puyol|Carles Puyol]], 2014 [http://m.espn.go.com/soccer/blogs/blogpost?w=1f8ef&amp;i=TOP&amp;id=2088115&amp;topslot=1&amp;wjb=]
* Messi is really a different class. To win four consecutive Ballon d'Ors is a great achievement.
** [[w:Ronaldo|Ronaldo]], 2014 [http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/sports/football/world-cup-2014/interviews/Fit-Neymar-can-win-the-World-Cup-for-us-Ronaldo/articleshow/36331745.cms]
* The Messi of the early years was a phenomenon, but he always wanted to finish off the move. Now he goes past one, two or three players and is happy to give an assist to a team-mate - it makes him more dangerous and more difficult to stop than ever before.
** [[w:Michael Laudrup|Michael Laudrup]], 2014 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/12/spain/2014/10/24/5436401/selfless-messi-is-more-dangerous-than-ever-laudrup]
* He's the first genius of the 21st century.
** [[w:Jorge Valdano|Jorge Valdano]], 2014 [http://www.goal.com/en-sg/news/3882/spain/2014/05/17/4823638/valdano-messi-the-first-genius-of-the-21st-century]
* I am not ashamed to admit that in the games against Barcelona I spent a lot of the time just hoping he would take up positions as far away from me as possible.
** [[w:Paul Scholes|Paul Scholes]], 2015 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/news-and-comment/paul-scholes-column-lionel-messi-is-a-genius-and-it-only-takes-a-second-for-him-to-trick-you-into-doing-something-daft--i-should-know-10057647.html]
* I think about the great players with whom I have shared a pitch: Eric Cantona, Zinedine Zidane, Pirlo, Xavi, Cristiano Ronaldo – and the greatest of them all is Messi.
** [[w:Paul Scholes|Paul Scholes]], 2015 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/news-and-comment/paul-scholes-column-you-cant-beat-barcelona-at-their-own-game--juventus-must-defend-and-hit-them-on-counterattack-10298216.html]
* He's a problem solver, a game changer, the greatest player to have played the game. I am more than 60 years old now, and I don't believe that I've seen, or that I'm likely to see, anyone better in my lifetime. The world's best when I was growing up was Pele and he would have been a great player now, too, but Messi surpasses him. He's also way out ahead of Diego Maradona - it's not even close anymore.
** [[w:Graeme Souness|Graeme Souness]], 2015 [http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/graeme-souness-lionel-messi-best-5673468]
* I was lucky enough to play with Zidane, Ronaldo, Figo, Cristiano... but Messi is different; he makes everything look so easy, so effortless – even the impossible.
** [[w:Raúl (footballer)|Raúl]], 2015 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/babb/11577257/Real-Madrid-icon-Raul-says-Lionel-Messi-is-the-greatest-player-hes-ever-seen.html]
* Messi makes the difference. I think he has reached and surpassed the level of Maradona.
** [[w:Paolo Maldini|Paolo Maldini]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/ChampionsLeague/status/606751034208329728]
* The best by far is Messi. Second is Maradona, third is Pele and Di Stefano. Fifth is Cruyff, Zidane or Pele.
** [[w:José Luis Chilavert|José Luis Chilavert]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/barca/jose-luis-chilavert-messi-the-best-all-time-far-3927554]
* Not often I sit and watch football and chuckle at how good someone is.
** [[w:Matt Le Tissier|Matt Le Tissier]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/mattletiss7/status/578291760100712448]
* Messi is the real deal when it comes to No10s. He represents a type of football that transcends borders.
** [[w:Alessandro del Piero|Alessandro del Piero]], 2015 [http://m.fifa.com/ballon-dor/news/y=2015/m=1/news=del-piero-ronaldo-is-the-future-2504045.html]
* Messi is the best in the world by far; for me, nobody comes close.
** [[w:Ian Wright|Ian Wright]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4XvAfwx7VY]
* What Messi does is terrifying. It’s indescribable magic. You can’t analyze it.
** [[w:César Luis Menotti|César Luis Menotti]], 2015 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/menotti-rinde-culto-magia-messi-3944468]
* I love Messi. Who doesn't? He's from another planet. An extraordinary player.
** [[w:Gabriel Batistuta|Gabriel Batistuta]], 2015 [http://www.ole.com.ar/seleccion/Batistuta-elogios-Messi_0_1376862552.html]
* Messi has been the best player of the last 10 years. He played at the same level for 10 years.
** [[w:Pelé|Pelé]], 2015 [http://www.101greatgoals.com/blog/pele-lionel-messi-player-world-10-years-video/]
* I never ever thought I would say that there was a better player than Maradona since he was in my time and I was in awe of him, but I honestly think for a number of reasons that Messi has surpassed him. He can do anything that Maradona did, and he does it more frequently and consistently.
** [[w:Gary Lineker|Gary Lineker]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IraqA3uSygk]
* He's head and shoulders above anyone I've seen. He's an alien. He's better now than he was four years ago because he reads the game better. He's unstoppable.
** [[w:Carles Puyol|Carles Puyol]], 2015 [http://www.lavanguardia.com/deportes/futbol/20150627/54432559147/carles-puyol-seguir-sin-cobrar.html]
* Barcelona have a great team with one special player, Messi. He is able to unlock a game from out of nowhere. Cristiano Ronaldo has been putting in spectacular performances, but there really is no comparison with Messi. Messi is on another level than all the other players. He is the undisputed best. No player has the ability to do what he does.
** [[w: Miguel Ángel Nadal|Miguel Ángel Nadal]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2015/07/16/13629532/cristiano-ronaldo-no-match-for-messi-says-nadal]
* He can hurt you 40 metres away from goal, not because he takes the ball and starts dribbling past opponents, but because on top of that he can also create the definitive goal chance. The god of football started playing, he is unstoppable when he starts playing. If you think otherwise, ask Jerome Boateng or all those fantastic players that face him.
** [[w:Francisco José Carrasco|Lobo Carrasco]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/596/exclusive/2015/07/22/13783172/messi-better-now-than-he-was-in-2009]
* Messi is the best I’ve ever seen. I don’t dish out praise lightly but Messi deserves it. I look for weaknesses in his game and I can’t find them.
** [[w:Roy Keane|Roy Keane]], 2015 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/european/lionel-messi-is-the-barcelona-forward-the-greatest-of-them-all-10287066.html]
* He really is from a different planet. Even if you are supporting another team you have to admit this.
** [[w:Patrick Kluivert|Patrick Kluivert]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/patrickkluivert/status/596049093824090112]
* Messi is the Pelé of my generation. I don't understand the criticism of him. You cannot criticize a player like Messi.
** [[w:Juliano Belletti|Juliano Belletti]], 2015 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/belletti-messi-pele-generacion-4372158]
* I heard an interview with Sir Alex Ferguson where he revealed his greatest players of all time. He said Messi was in a category of his own. I am a big fan of Diego Maradona but Messi is a phenomenon. His performances at club level are unbelievable. You can play a season or two like that, but not all these years. He set the bar very high from the start.
** [[w:Georgi Kinkladze|Georgi Kinkladze]], 2015 [http://www.uefa.com/uefasupercup/news/newsid=2265854.html]
* He doesn't have the personality to be a leader.
** [[w:Diego Maradona|Diego Maradona]], 2016 [http://www.firstpost.com/sports/diego-maradonas-criticism-lionel-messi-divides-argentina-2829420.html]
* Sometimes I ask myself if Messi is human
** [[w: Thierry Henry|Thierry Henry]], 2016 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GGMaz93kgs]
* Every player on the planet is in Messi's shadow. If you want to step out of Messi's shadow, you should try another sport.
**  [[w: Thierry Henry|Thierry Henry]], 2018 [https://www.soccerladuma.co.za/news/articles/international/categories/messi-ronaldo-neymar-watch-1/thierry-henry-explains-controversial-neymar-lionel-messi-comments/288960]

=== From football figures ===

* I have never seen a player like him, with so much quality and audacity at his age, in a so important a stadium and with that shirt. He has everything. He has an extraordinary future - I'd love to bring him to Juve!
** [[w:Fabio Capello|Fabio Capello]], manager of [[Juventus F.C.|Juventus]], 2005 [https://www.infobae.com/2005/08/25/206219-el-mundo-aplaude-messi]
* When I see Messi - who is the best player in the world in my opinion - lose the ball, he runs off until he gets it back or commits a foul. Our guys lose the ball and fold their arms.
** [[w:Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva|Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva]], president of [[w:Brazil|Brazil]], 2008 [http://www.dnaindia.com/sport/report-lionel-messi-is-the-worlds-best-footballer-1187854]
* What Messi brings to a team, no other player can bring.
** [[w:Mauricio Pochettino|Mauricio Pochettino]], manager of [[w:RCD Espanyol|Espanyol]], 2009 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/12/spain/2009/12/11/1681171/without-lionel-messi-barcelona-lose-the-best-player-in-the-world-]
*If you're speaking of a fantasy player, then it has to be Leo Messi as he is so unpredictable.
** [[w:Fabio Capello|Fabio Capello]], manager of [[w:England national football team|England]], 2009 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1216376/Fabio-Capellos-fantasy-football-Lionel-Messi-pick-genius-Ronaldo-second-Wayne-Rooney-gets-mention.html]
* [How to stop Messi?] You need to bring a shotgun, pam-pam and that's it.
** [[w:Gregorio Manzano|Gregorio Manzano]], manager of [[w:RCD Mallorca|Mallorca]], 2010 [http://m.goal.com/s/en/news/1844965/]
* Messi is the best player I’ve seen in my life. Not just better but much better. Much faster. Much, much more skilful.
** [[w:Miguel Ángel Lotina|Miguel Ángel Lotina]], manager of [[w:Deportivo de La Coruña|Deportivo]], 2010 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1260692/Jeff-Powell-Maestro-Messi--This-genius-nearest-thing-Ive-seen-Maradona.html]
* I think he is certainly one of the best in the world and people are right to make comparisons with Diego Maradona. It’s amazing when you think he is still only 22-years-old. He’s just a fantastic player.
** [[w:Christian Gross|Christian Gross]], manager of [[w:VfB Stuttgart|Stuttgart]], 2010 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/competitions/champions-league/7470536/Barcelonas-Lionel-Messi-hailed-as-good-as-Diego-Maradona-after-breathtaking-display.html]
* Put in the superlatives yourselves, I'm running out. It's already been a while now that he has been outstanding. That he's capable of doing everything that he does at his age is something impressive, that doesn't make any sense.
** [[Pep Guardiola]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|Barcelona]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2010/mar/22/lionel-messi-barcelona]
* Messi has once again shown that he is a wonderful player and that he is, without doubt, the leader of Barcelona. He is the best player in the world and the best in the history of football. Along with Cruyff and Maradona, he is the best player we have seen at Barça.
** [[w:Joan Laporta|Joan Laporta]], president of [[w:FC Barcelona|Barcelona]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2010/mar/22/lionel-messi-barcelona]
* Tonight, I saw Diego Maradona, but at more revs per minute. There are no words left to describe him – he is interplanetary. We could have beaten Barcelona but we could never have beaten Leo Messi. If we had scored four, he would have scored 12.
** [[w:José Aurelio Gay|José Aurelio Gay]], manager of [[w:Real Zaragoza|Real Zaragoza]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2010/mar/22/leo-messi-barcelona-la-liga-spain]
* Messi is like a Playstation.
** [[w:Arsène Wenger|Arsène Wenger]], manager of [[w:Arsenal F.C.|Arsenal]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2010/apr/07/barcelona-arsenal-lionel-messi]
* You cannot compare anyone to Messi. Cristiano Ronaldo is a great human player, but Messi is a Martian.
** [[w:Alfio Basile|Alfio Basile]], manager of [[w:Racing Club de Avellaneda|Racing Club]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2012/07/29/3273637/cristiano-ronaldo-is-a-great-human-player-but-messi-is-a-martian-]
* I don't know the parameters for the Ballon d'Or. I only know that Messi deserves to win every trophy.
** [[w:Manuel Pellegrini|Manuel Pellegrini]], manager of [[w:Málaga CF|Málaga]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-us/news/88/spain/2012/05/03/3078126/pellegrini-messi-deserves-to-win-every-individual-honor]
* Diego Maradona filled us with emotions. But between the cracks, without doubt, Messi is better than Maradona.
** [[w:Diego Simeone|Diego Simeone]], manager of [[w:Atlético Madrid|Atlético Madrid]], 2012 [http://www.marca.com/2012/12/30/futbol/equipos/atletico/1356896765.html]
* Whoever plays football knows that there are no words for Messi. He is a category all of his own: the best player in the world, another galaxy.
** [[w:Robin Dutt|Robin Dutt]], manager of [[w:Bayer Leverkusen|Bayer Leverkusen]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* Messi is like an Oliver Twist character, picking a pocket or two, the Artful Dodger, where he’s just sort of slipping around, looking like a little lad in the playground. He’s not really taking it seriously, and he makes you smile every time he gets the ball. And when he does some of these things, I have to laugh because it’s not possible what he does. It’s wonderful to watch. It’s just wonderful to see. You’ve got to pinch yourself sometimes, it’s really amazing what he does.
** [[w:Terry Venables|Terry Venables]], former manager of [[w:England national football team|England]], 2012 [http://keepingscore.blogs.time.com/2012/01/26/the-experts-weigh-in-messi-may-be-the-best-of-all-time-except-for-one-thing/]
* Look at Lionel Messi – he gets kicked every week. Everybody wants to kick Messi because it is the only way to stop him, but all he ever does is sort of smile, get up and get on with it, and then does it again.
** [[w:David Moyes|David Moyes]], manager of [[w:Everton F.C.|Everton]], 2013 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2013/feb/26/marouane-fellaini-everton-oldham]
* Messi is just a one-off, a freak of nature, who sees and does things nobody else sees or does. 
** [[w:Guillem Balagué|Guillem Ballagué]], football expert on [[w:Sky Sports|Sky Sports]], 2013 [http://www.skysports.com/football/news/12087/8452615/guillem-balague-previews-the-copa-del-rey-clasico-between-real-madrid-and-barcelona]
* With respect to Leo, I don’t know what can I say. Nothing surprises me with him. He controls the game well, passes the ball well, he is a good finisher, he can press and recover the ball. He is a footballer that can do everything. He sees passes that most people can only see whilst watching the game on TV or in the stands, not ones that you can normally see on the field.
** [[w:Gerardo Martino|Gerardo Martino]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|Barcelona]], 2014 [http://www.thenational.ae/sport/barcelona/he-is-a-footballer-that-can-do-everything-says-martino-after-another-messi-display]
* When he gets going, he creates panic. You have to have a perfect game to stop him.
** [[w:Luis García (footballer, born 1972)|Luis García]], manager of [[w:Getafe CF|Getafe CF]], 2014 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/94774/luis-garcia-you-have-to-be-perfect-to-stop-messi/]
* Messi is from another galaxy. Fans get used to it, but what he does is not normal.
** [[w:Rodolfo Borell|Rodolfo Borell]], former [[w:Liverpool F.C.|Liverpool]] youth coach, 2015 [http://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/fc-barcelona/20150219/54426308722/rodolfo-borrell.html]
* He’s like a kid at school playing against a load of kids who can’t play, it’s incredible. It’s so silly; he’s on another planet, just amazing.
** [[w:Harry Redknapp|Harry Redknapp]], former manager of [[w:England national football team|England]], 2015 [http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11095/9872694/harry-redknapp-lionel-messi-is-on-another-planet]
* Of course life is easier with Lionel Messi. He does all sorts of things. We see that every day. He is from another planet.
** [[w:Luis Enrique (footballer)|Luis Enrique]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|FC Barcelona]], 2015 [http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/season=2015/matches/round=2000551/match=2014428/postmatch/quotes/]
* I've never seen a better player than Messi. He's so good that he can even get around the three players you send after him and still notice the two teammates he has in space. It'll be hard to ever see another player like him.
** [[w:Fran Escribá|Fran Escribá]], manager of [[w:Elche CF|Elche]], 2015 [http://www.marca.com/en/2015/01/24/en/football/barcelona/1422104727.html]
* Messi has creativity, imagination, he can go straight for goal... He can pass like nobody else in the world. Messi is in another dimension.
** [[w:Fabio Capello|Fabio Capello]], manager of [[w:Russia national football team|Russia]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/barca/fabio-capello-leo-messi-the-best-the-world-cristiano-ronaldo-the-best-madrid-4098351]
* Messi is best player ever. Some say Pele, Cruyff or Maradona, but none of them was as decisive as Messi.
** [[w:Ronald Koeman|Ronald Koeman]], manager of [[w:Southampton F.C.|Southampton]], 2015 [http://www.cope.es/detalle/Entrevista-a-Koeman-en-El-Partido-de-las-12-08-06-2015.html]
* Messi is the number one footballer in the world. No other player in the past few years comes close.
** [[w:Diego Simeone|Diego Simeone]], manager of [[w:Atlético Madrid|Atlético Madrid]], 2015 [http://www.tycsports.com/noticias/Simeone-y-la-importancia-de-la-Copa-America-20150620-0001.html]
* Messi proves himself nearly every game. Despite his immense talent, he remains very modest. I like that in him and I respect Messi a lot.
** [[w:Louis van Gaal|Louis van Gaal]], manager of [[w:Manchester United F.C.|Manchester United]], 2015 [http://www.marca.com/en/2015/07/06/en/football/barcelona/1436203933.html]
* I feel sad when the best player in the world is chosen, and I see, for example, that the Portuguese coach—my friend Fernando Santos—does not place Messi among the top three. It's absurd. As a Portuguese man, I will say that Ronaldo is the best in the world. Messi is from another planet.
** [[w:Jorge Nuno Pinto da Costa|Pinto da Costa]], president of [[w:FC Porto|FC Porto]], 2015 [http://deportes.elpais.com/deportes/2015/07/19/actualidad/1437333518_715731.html]
* Messi's ability to play at the highest level with Barcelona and their consistency is what wins them these titles.
** [[w:Unai Emery|Unai Emery]], manager of [[w:Sevilla FC|Sevilla]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/ChampionsLeague/status/631227153124851712]
* I applaud what he does and I hope the crowd enjoyed and will remember what he does. We are fortunate to be around while the best is playing. It is a pleasure to have him with us. Today was a real show. He is the best there is and there has been.
** [[w:Ernesto Valverde|Ernesto Valverde]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|FC Barcelona]], 2018 [https://www.fcbarcelona.com/football/first-team/news/2017-2018/ernesto-valverde-it-was-a-question-of-persistence-post-game-reactions-players-betis-fc-barcelona-villamarin-0-5]

=== From media figures ===

* Simply stellar, proud and majestic. He is the re-incarnation of Maradona.
** Enrique Yunta of [[w:ABC (newspaper)|ABC]], 2007 [http://www.abc.es/hemeroteca/historico-11-03-2007/abc/Deportes/y-maradona-se-reencarno_1631918623996.html#]
* You can forget the Little Donkey, the Rabbit, the Clown and all the other great pretenders, it's the Flea with the fast feet and fabulous control who gets closest to el Diego. He may not have the same the strutting confidence or the big mouth - in fact, he makes whispering Ted Lowe sound like a town crier - but there's definitely something about Messi.
** Sid Lowe of [[w:The Guardian|The Guardian]], 2007 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2007/mar/12/europeanfootball.sport1]
* I have played against Platini, Maradona, Cruyff and played with George Best — a lot of big names, but none of them has been able to do what Messi does. Two years ago I said that the best player I played against was Maradona and the best player I have played with was Bestie. But I can now say I have never seen a player as good as Messi. He’s in a league of his own.
** [[w:Gerry Armstrong (footballer)|Gerry Armstrong]], 2010 [http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/football/european/gerry-armstrong-lionel-messi-is-the-greatest-28526228.html]
* They say all men are equal in god's eyes. This player makes you seriously think about those words.
** [[w:Ray Hudson|Ray Hudson]], 2012 [http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1036161-lionel-messi-hat-trick-video-watch-ray-hudson-lose-mind-over-barcelona-star]
* If he is so good, how can you express that? The superlatives ran out ages ago. On these pages, swearing has been tried. Or perhaps a symbol, something to signify that we have gone beyond words now.
** Sid Lowe of [[w:The Guardian|The Guardian]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/21/lionel-messi-record-goalscorer-barcelona]
* There are three or four important things in life: books, friends, women, and Messi.
** [[w:António Lobo Antunes|António Lobo Antunes]], 2012 [http://elpais.com/diario/2012/01/14/babelia/1326503558_850215.html]
* Are there any adjectives and superlatives left to describe little Leo? Messi is unstoppable and we should feel privileged to be watching a player who may be the best of all time.
** Pedro Pinto of [[w:CNN|CNN]], 2012 [http://worldsport.blogs.cnn.com/2012/12/28/fantasy-football-pedro-pintos-team-of-2012/]
* I like Messi because he doesn’t think he’s Messi.
** [[w:Eduardo Galeano|Eduardo Galeano]], 2013 [http://www.fifa.com/world-match-centre/news/newsid/198/641/1/index.html]
* Here he is again ... here he is again .. that's astonishing, absolutely world-class!
** [[w:Martin Tyler|Martin Tyler]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Br024vDcgik]
* Messi saved football. There has never been such an overwhelming, devastating, decisive and unique player.
** [[w:Juan García Esquivel|Esquivel]], 2015 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/carlos-esquivel-messi-salvado-futbol-3927310]
* At the Camp Nou Messi scored two brilliant goals, made a third and at times yawned his way around champion opponents like a man tactfully avoiding a gaggle of overheated toddlers in a high street coffee shop. Often he took the ball and shimmied past two or three men, operating within a kind of fermata, events slowed and paused around him, and providing a reminder that he remains one of the great dribblers, master of the flip-flap, the surge, the amphetamine-crazed-millipede shift of feet.
** Barney Ronay of [[w:The Guardian|The Guardian]], 2015 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2015/may/07/lionel-messi-barcelona-bayern-munich]
* People think I am an admirer of Messi. No, you are all wrong. I am an admirer of genius in football. The greatest footballer that I have ever seen in my life.
** [[w:Ray Hudson|Ray Hudson]], 2018, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXyNxBAJ2gM]
*He was beautiful. He was the point of difference. He has always been the point of difference. Unparalleled, and maybe today there will, of course, always be those who argue, always be those who debate. And the debate could rage on if you like. But as he falls in love with the object in the world that his heart most desired, it is hard to escape the supposition that he has rendered himself today, the greatest of all time.
** [[w:Peter Drury|Peter Drury]], 2022, [https://www.sportskeeda.com/football/news-there-anybody-else-like-him-peter-drury-sums-lionel-messi-greatness-iconic-2022-fifa-world-cup-final-monologue]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commons category}}
{{wikinews}}
* [https://sites.google.com/view/messiorronaldo/home Opinions on Messi vs Ronaldo]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Messi, Lionel}}
[[Category:1987 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Soccer players from Argentina]]
[[Category:Ambassadors]]
[[Category:Philanthropists]]
[[Category:Catholics from Argentina]]
[[Category:People from Rosario]]
[[Category:UNICEF goodwill ambassadors]]
[[Category:World record holders]]</text>
      <sha1>galyu43l1k164g2yummdi03adp3u1fr</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965057</id>
      <parentid>3965056</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:30:53Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39602-71</username>
        <id>3350120</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3965057</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="57562" sha1="pmp57n18llp5js3gqsoy5iaiqfytz94" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Leo messi barce 2005.jpg|thumb|right|upright|Messi, at age 18, playing against Málaga in 2005]]

'''[[w:Lionel Messi|Lionel Andrés Messi Cuccittini]]''' ([[24 June]] [[1987]] - [[14 July]] [[2026]]) was an Argentine professional [[w:Association football|footballer]] who played as a [[w:Forward (association football)|forward]] for [[w:Major League Soccer|Major League Soccer]] club [[w:Inter Miami CF|Inter Miami]] and the [[w:Argentina national football team|Argentina national team]].

== Quotes ==

* Diego is Diego and for me he is the greatest player of all time. Even after a million years I am not even going to be close to Maradona. I have no intention of comparing myself with Maradona - I want to make my own history for something I have achieved.
** Response to the [[w:Diego Maradona|Maradona]] comparisons, 2010 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/players/lionel-messi/7527633/Barcelonas-Lionel-Messi-says-he-will-never-be-as-good-as-Diego-Maradona.html]
* It doesn't matter if I am better than Cristiano Ronaldo, all that matters is that Barcelona are better than Madrid.
** After scoring four goals against [[w:Arsenal F.C.|Arsenal]], 2011 [http://www.taringa.net/posts/deportes/12977787/Grandes-frases-de-y-sobre-Messi.html]
* Ronaldo (Brazilian footballer) was my hero. He was the best forward I've ever seen. He was so fast that he could score a goal from nothing and he struck the ball better than anyone I've seen.
** Interview with [[w:FourFourTwo|FourFourTwo]], 2012 [http://www.fourfourtwo.com/news/messi-brazil-striker-ronaldo-my-hero]
* Being a dad changes everything for the better and I’m really enjoying it.
** Interview with [[w:Torneos y Competencias|TyC Sports]], 2014 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/101179/messi-being-a-dad-changes-everything-for-the-better/]
* Barcelona gave me everything, they took a chance on me when nobody else would. I never have any desire to play for anybody else, I will be here for as long as they want me.
** Interview with [[w:ShortList|ShortList]], 2015 [http://www.shortlist.com/entertainment/sport/lionel-messi-talks-champions-league-copa-america]
* [Becoming a father] has changed everything. He [Thiago] comes first then everything else. It has also changed the way I see a match. Before if I lost or did something wrong I didn't talk to anyone for three or four days, until it passed. Now, I come home after a game, I see my son and everything is alright.
** Interview with [[w:CONMEBOL|CONMEBOL]], 2015 [http://www.conmebol.com/en/04132015-2140/messi-being-father-has-helped-me-grow-and-think-life-there-are-other-things-besides]
*I love to see T-shirts or flags with [[Che Guevara]], [[Diego Maradona|Diego [Maradona]]] and Argentina anywhere in the world. It gives me a beautiful feeling.
** [https://www.batimes.com.ar/news/argentina/we-must-fight-to-correct-inequality-says-messi-in-rare-political-interview.phtml?fb_comment_id=2079723078818062_2652111718245859 ‘We must fight to correct inequality,’ says Messi in rare political interview], Buenos Aires Times.
*I will never go to trial against Barça because it is the club that I love, which has given me everything since I arrived here. It's the club of my life, I made my life here. [https://www.naijanews247.com/watch-full-messi-interview-announces-he-remains-at-barca/ Messi interview with Goal, announced he remains at Barca - NAIJANEWS247]  September 4, 2020.
* I never set out to be the best player in history. I think I'm just another footballer. On the pitch we are all the same and when the game starts I always try to improve myself. My intention is that when I retire, I will be remembered for being a good person.
** [https://www.tbsnews.net/sports/qatar-world-cup-will-be-my-last-lionel-messi-509530 &quot;Qatar World Cup will be my last: Lionel Messi&quot;, ''TBS News'' (6 October 2022)]
*I knew that at some point God was going to give it to me and I don't know why, but I felt it was going to be like this. Once again he made me very happy. 
** [https://www.marca.com/en/world-cup/2022/12/18/639f867e46163f5a628b4616.html After lifting the World Cup trophy ] 18 December 2022
*In football as in watchmaking, talent and elegance mean nothing without rigour and precision&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You have to keep working hard and playing well because people will start to forget what you have done before if you don’t&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*When you lose, you get up, you make mistakes and you learn. And then you become a better player&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*The day you think there is no improvement to be made, is a sad one&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I’m never satisfied. I always push my limits and try to get better every day&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Every year I try to grow as a player and not get stuck in a rut. I try to improve my game in every way possible. But that trait is not something I've worked on, it's part of me&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You cannot allow your desire to be a winner to be diminished by achieving success before and I believe there is room for improvement in every sportsman&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I always try to improve and score more goals. I want to be the best.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I always want more. Whether it’s a goal, or winning a game, I always want to improve.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*My ambition is always to get better and better&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*For my part, I try to do my bit to make people's lives more bearable, in particular children across the globe who are having problems&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*There’s nothing more satisfying than seeing a happy and smiling child. I always help in any way I can, even if it’s just by signing an autograph. A child’s smile is worth more than all the money in the world&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Sometimes you have to accept you can't win all the time&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I never think about the play or visualize anything. I do what comes to me at that moment. Instinct. It has always been that way&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*There are more important things in life than winning or losing a game&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*The best decisions aren’t made with your mind, but with your instinct&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Allow yourselves to dream and then chase after those dreams. That will always require effort and sacrifice, but be persistent!”[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Money is not a motivating factor. Money doesn't thrill me or make me play better because there are benefits to being wealthy. I'm just happy with a ball at my feet. My motivation comes from playing the game I love. If I wasn't paid to be a professional footballer I would willingly play for nothing.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*&quot;I always thought I wanted to play professionally, and I always knew that to do that I’d have to make a lot of sacrifices.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I made sacrifices by leaving Argentina, leaving my family to start a new life. I changed my friends, my people.&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*Everything. But everything I did, I did for football, to achieve my dream&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You have to fight to reach your dream. You have to sacrifice and work hard for it&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I have fun like a child in the street. When the day comes when I'm not enjoying it, I will leave football&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*You can overcome anything, if and only if you love something enough&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I've always really just liked football, and I've always devoted a lot of time to it. When I was a kid, my friends would call me to go out with them, but I would stay home because I had practice the next day&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I start early, and I stay late, day after day, year after year, it took me 17 years and 114 days to become an overnight success&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I always thought that if you want to be the best, you have to work harder than everyone else&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I prefer to win titles with the team ahead of individual awards or scoring more goals than anyone else. I'm more worried about being a good person than being the best football player in the world. When all this is over, what are you left with? When I retire, I hope I am remembered for being a decent guy&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]
*I'm lucky to be part of a team who help to make me look good, and they deserve as much of the credit for my success as I do for the hard work we have all put in on the training ground&quot;[https://jobsinfootball.com/blog/lionel-messi-quotes/]

== Quotes about Messi ==
=== From current footballers ===

* In the semi-final Messi showed he's the top man. He is only 20 as well, imagine how good he will be in the next 10 years. I'd love to play alongside him.
** [[w:Joe Cole|Joe Cole]], 2008 [http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/c/chelsea/7401762.stm]
* He is from another planet. He is the main point of reference and the key man in the whole Barça team.
** [[w:Carlos Tévez|Carlos Tévez]], 2008 [http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/europe/7358172.stm]
* I'm not sure he is human.
** [[w:Ander Herrera|Ander Herrera]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2010/mar/22/leo-messi-barcelona-la-liga-spain]
* To me, Messi is the greatest player in the world right now. He has got a fantastic vision of the game, and what he can do technically - it's just crazy. The things he can do with the ball - and at pace and top speed - is just amazing. What decides it for me is not his many goals, although his goal account is impressive, but the thing is that he can do so much for his team. What counts is the total amount of his many, many qualities. He is just the greatest.
** [[w:Nicklas Bendtner|Nicklas Bendtner]], 2010 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1262224/Lionel-Messi-worlds-best-Arsenal-scupper-Barcelona-insists-Nicklas-Bendtner.html]
* Messi is the best and cannot be compared to anyone. Messi cannot be compared to anything.
** [[w:César Sánchez|César Sánchez]], 2010 [http://www.elmundo.es/elmundodeporte/2010/03/22/futbol/1269260204.html]
* When you face him you have to make decisions in an instant. When he approaches you, you have to make the sign of the cross and pray that everything will be alright.
** [[w:Thiago Silva|Thiago Silva]], 2011 [http://www.football-italia.net/node/13081]
* I’ve always said Messi is the best player in the world.
** [[w:Neymar|Neymar]], 2011 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/5523/neymar-messi-is-the-best-in-the-world/]
* Although he may not be human, it's good that Messi still thinks he is.
** [[w:Javier Mascherano|Javier Mascherano]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2012/05/06/3084331/although-messi-may-not-be-human-its-good-he-still-thinks-he]
* Messi is God, as a person and even more as a player.
** [[w:Samuel Eto'o|Samuel Eto'o]], 2012 [http://www.marca.com/2012/12/11/en/football/barcelona/1355261391.html]
* People often say to me they saw Pele and Maradona play. In the future, I will be able to say I saw Messi play.
** [[w:Thiago Alcântara|Thiago Alcântara]], 2012 [http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/lionel-messi-hailed-world-treasure-3307492]
* There is no doubt, you're from another galaxy. Thanks Leo.
** [[w:Maxi Rodríguez|Maxi Rodríguez]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/mr11ok/status/177512610789474304]
* Messi is a joke. For me, the best ever.
** [[w:Wayne Rooney|Wayne Rooney]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/waynerooney/status/177501243822968833]
* Is Messi playing in the Champions League or is he playing a Playstation game?
** [[w:Radamel Falcao|Radamel Falcao]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/falcao/status/177508905629388800]
* He plays like he’s on PlayStation, it’s unbelievable. People who say otherwise either don’t know anything about football or are just talking nonsense.
** [[w:Zlatan Ibrahimovic|Zlatan Ibrahimovic]], 2012 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/34205/ibrahimovic-admits-messi-should-win-ballon-dor/]{{deadlink|date=November 2018}}
* Leo is from another planet. What makes him the best is that other great players have had ups and downs, like Maradona. He wasn’t half of what Leo is at Barça. Messi has had so many good years in his career that he deserves to be considered the best ever.
** [[w:Gerard Piqué|Gerard Piqué]], 2012 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/28669/pique-ronaldo-is-the-best-among-humans-but-messi-is-from-another-planet/]
* Messi does not need his right foot. He only uses the left and he's still the best in the world! Imagine if he also used his right foot ... Then we would have serious problems!
** [[w:Zlatan Ibrahimovic|Zlatan Ibrahimovic]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-us/news/174/uefa-champions-league/2012/04/02/3009799/ibrahimovic-messi-is-all-talent-while-ronaldo-is-a-product]
* For years I thought that there would never be a player like Maradona. But now Messi is at his level.
** [[w:Pablo Aimar|Pablo Aimar]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* It’s something for me that I can tell my kids that I’ve played against Messi when we watch him on television. For me he’s got everything. He is magical to watch. When I finish and look back, and he will still be going strong, I will be able to say to myself I tested myself against the best. And quite clearly, for me, he is the best ever. He’s a great individual player but a great person as well and a credit to football.
** [[w:John Terry|John Terry]], 2012 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/chelsea/9189675/John-Terry-playing-through-the-pain-barrier-for-double-chasing-Chelseas-cause.html]
* I am not crazy enough to compare myself with Messi because he is the best there ever was and the best there will ever be.
** [[w:Mario Gómez|Mario Gómez]], 2012 [http://www.firstpost.com/sports/if-barcelona-have-messi-then-bayern-have-gomez-276195.html]
* He's a once in a generation player. I think it's unlikely that any human being again will repeat the numbers that Messi is getting.
** [[w:Gianluigi Buffon|Gianluigi Buffon]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/10/italy/2012/12/29/3636448/buffon-believes-juventus-team-mate-pirlo-is-same-quality-as]
* He's been by far and away the best footballer in the world for the last five or six years. He's the best player of all time and if he stays fit he will continue for the next five or six years. The things he does right now are out of this world. Of course, he doesn't play by himself, but he is simply incredible. He always finds a way and is always a yard quicker than everyone else. If you have a player like that on your side, you needn't fear anyone.
** [[w:Josip Šimunić|Josip Šimunić]], 2012 [https://web.archive.org/web/20140709015241/http://www.fifa.com/worldcup/news/y=2012/m=12/news=simunic-messi-the-best-all-time-1967479.html]
* I think Messi is the best in the world, a very good player and that he is a gift from god.
** [[w:Keylor Navas|Keylor Navas]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/72324/navas-messi-is-the-best/]
* He is by far the best player in the world – he’s a one-off.
** [[w:Fabricio Coloccini|Fabricio Coloccini]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/90467/coloccini-messi-is-by-far-the-best-player-in-the-world/]
* Messi is class. There is him, and then there is the rest. What he does is extraordinary. He demands admiration.
** [[w:Franck Ribéry|Franck Ribéry]], 2013 [http://www.goal.com/en-india/news/3753/germany/2013/04/21/3920652/ribery-messi-is-in-a-class-of-his-own]
* Messi is the best, for me, Messi is God, he is the best and always will be – for what he has given the team and for how much he has made me enjoy being in the same team as him.
** [[w:Victor Valdés|Victor Valdés]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/86728/valdes-messi-is-god/]
* It's the efficiency that made the difference. Messi is fantastic, the best player ever.
** [[w:David Luiz|David Luiz]], 2014 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2869764/Lionel-Messi-best-player-believes-PSG-defender-David-Luiz.html]
* Lionel Messi is out of this world, he's an alien. For me, he is the best player in the history of football.
** [[w:Arda Turan|Arda Turan]], 2014 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/european/lionel-messi-is-an-alien-says-arda-turan-following-atletico-madrids-draw-with-barcelona-9054454.html]
* Messi is God – you see him on the pitch and he is spectacular.
** [[w:Koke (footballer, born 1992)|Koke]], 2014 [http://as.com/diarioas/2014/10/08/english/1412767972_921851.html]
* Messi is unbelievable. It is great to get the chance to play against the best in the world. It doesn't really need repeating: he is a fantastic player.
** [[w:Niklas Moisander|Niklas Moisander]], 2014 [http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/news/newsid=1997197.html]
* Lionel Messi. Oh... I think this guy is fantastic. He’s the best player I have ever seen in my life.
** [[w:Alex Song|Alex Song]], 2014 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2830821/Lionel-Messi-best-player-world-s-nearly-won-wants-says-Alex-Song.html]
* Needless to repeat, that he’s the best player in the world, the best of all-time. I enjoy training with him, he makes everything easier.
** [[w:Ivan Rakitić|Ivan Rakitić]], 2014 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/121875/rakitic-messi-makes-everything-easier/]
* He's the best of all time.
** [[w:David Silva|David Silva]], 2014 [http://www.sportskeeda.com/football/lionel-messi-best-footballer-all-time-manchester-city-david-silva]
* Messi has always been my idol.
** [[w:Lucas Moura|Lucas Moura]], 2015 [http://futbol.as.com/futbol/2015/04/13/champions/1428888965_431999.html]
* He's achieved so many great things and set the bar so high that practically nobody is ever going to reach it.
** [[w:Mario Götze|Mario Götze]], 2015 [http://www.marca.com/en/2015/02/11/en/football/international_football/1423676088.html]
* Messi is the best player in the world. We'd have to kidnap him to stop him.
** [[w:Juan Bernat|Juan Bernat]], 2015 [http://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/fc-barcelona/20150507/2019996864/bernat-habria-que-secuestrar-a-messi.html]
* It's impossible to control Leo for 90 minutes.
** [[w:Mehdi Benatia|Mehdi Benatia]], 2015 [http://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/fc-barcelona/20150507/2019996864/bernat-habria-que-secuestrar-a-messi.html]
* Messi is an alien, that dedicates himself to playing with humans.
** [[w:Gianluigi Buffon|Gianluigi Buffon]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/barca/gianluigi-buffon-hope-this-weekend-lionel-messi-from-earth-like-4237272]
* Messi is so talented that 70% of the goals I scored at Barça came from his boots. With him in your team, you're calm.
** [[w:David Villa|David Villa]], 2015 [http://futbol.as.com/futbol/2015/06/15/internacional/1434387793_037035.html]
* Having him as a rival is complicated. You see game after game that it is impossible to take the ball off him, impossible to stop him. There are no words to decribe his talent. For me, and as others have said, he is from another planet.
** [[w:Ángel Di María|Ángel Di María]], 2015 [http://www.ca2015.com/es/news/cambiaria-todo-lo-que-gane-por-ganar-algo-con-la-seleccion/1pdxyo8fdviy71oozljvpurbw0]
* Messi is out of this world. He is a special player and you can't compare him to me. It would be unfair to him.
** [[w:James Rodríguez|James Rodríguez]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/world-football/messi-out-this-world-says-colombias-james-4296528]
* It's a gift. I haven’t seen any other player, at least during my career, who plays like Messi does. For me that makes him the best footballer in the world.
** [[w:Edinson Cavani|Edinson Cavani]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/nike5aside/cavani/en]
* For me, he's the best player in the world. That's football. Defending Messi one-on-one is not possible.
** [[w:Jérôme Boateng|Jérôme Boateng]], 2015 [http://www.espnfc.com/bayern-munich/story/2502318/jerome-boateng-laughs-about-lionel-messi-backs-pep-guardiola]
* Messi is the best player of all time, and today he had a stormer.
** [[w:Vitolo (footballer, born 1989)|Vitolo]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/ChampionsLeague/status/631219698336690176]
* I think Messi's just beyond everyone else.
** [[w:Massimo Luongo|Massimo Luongo]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2015/10/18/16272522/messi-deserves-ballon-dor-ahead-of-record-breaking-ronaldo]
* The best striker I have ever faced? Lionel Messi. It has always been Messi.
** [[w:Iker Casillas|Iker Casillas]], 2015 [http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/news/newsid=2294458.html]
* The best player ever? Lionel Messi.
** [[w:İlkay Gündoğan|İlkay Gündoğan]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o8wuLzLxSU]
* The best player ever? Lionel Messi.
** [[w:Marco Reus|Marco Reus]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDmeUKh3Hos]
*There is only one G.O.A.T: Him, Lionel Messi!
** [[w:Eden Hazard|Eden Hazard]]
* I spent four beautiful years with Messi at Barcelona. He is an exceptional player. I'm very happy that he was my teammate.
** [[w:Ousmane Dembélé|Ousmane Dembélé]], December 2022 [https://twitter.com/barcauniversal/status/1603803249009725441]

=== From former footballers ===

* This award says I’m the best player in the world, but I’m not even the best player at Barcelona.
** [[w:Ronaldinho|Ronaldinho]], 2006 [http://www.espnfc.com/story/359600]
* I have seen the player who will inherit my place in Argentine football and his name is Messi. Messi is a genius and he can become an even better player. His potential is limitless and I think he’s got everything it takes to become Argentina’s greatest player.
** [[w:Diego Maradona|Diego Maradona]], 2008 [http://www.fifa.com/tournaments/archive/mensolympic/beijing2008/news/newsid=822737/index.html]
* He deserves 10 out of 10 for doing what he does. 
** [[w:Johan Cruyff|Johan Cruyff]], 2008 [http://www.abc.net.au/news/2008-08-01/lionel-messi-grand-stage-for-argentine-show-stopper/460852]
* I see Messi every time he grabs the ball and accelerates. But he is shy, like a little brother who likes to hang out with PlayStation rather than talk. We must protect him. I'd personally put him in a drawer of my bedside table.
** [[w:Juan Sebastián Verón|Juan Sebastián Verón]], 2008 [http://www.uefa.com/news/newsid=643796.html]
* The other day I saw one of his games. He was running with the ball at a hundred percent full speed, I don’t know how many touches he took, maybe five or six, but the ball was glued to his foot. It’s practically impossible.
** [[w:Raúl (footballer)|Raúl]], 2008 [http://www.ibnlive.com/news/india/would-watch-messi-over-ronaldo-says-raul-303939.html]
* Nobody was so wonderful at 19 years, neither Pele nor Maradona.
** [[w:Karl-Heinz Rummenigge|Karl-Heinz Rummenigge]], 2008 [http://www.dailynews.com/sports/20100511/green-world-cup-could-be-messi-situation]
* Leo floats over the field - sometimes you have the sensation he's not even there, that he's hiding. But he's there and the rival knows it.
** [[w:Johan Cruyff|Johan Cruyff]], 2010 [http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/15964/6081569/quotes-of-the-week]
* Messi is out of this planet, I would say he is so far ahead of the rest of the players playing right now and I would say historically as well. There are not words to describe him.
** [[w:Ossie Ardilles|Ossie Ardilles]], 2010 [http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/15964/6081569/quotes-of-the-week]
* Once they said they can only stop me with a pistol, but today you need a machine gun to stop him.
** [[w:Hristo Stoichkov|Hristo Stoichkov]], 2010 [http://uk.reuters.com/article/2010/04/12/uk-soccer-bulgaria-stoichkov-idUKTRE63B1DO20100412]
* For me, to watch Messi play is a pleasure – it's like having an orgasm – it's an incredible pleasure.
** [[w:Luís Figo|Luís Figo]], 2010 [http://www.rtve.es/deportes/20100419/figo-culpa-sera-dios-del-entrenador/328132.shtml]
* When I see Messi playing, I think he should win the Ballon d'Or every year. I have no doubt. He is an unbelievable player.
** [[w:Paolo Maldini|Paolo Maldini]], 2010 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/20101122/maldini-messi-deberia-ganar-balon-oro-cada-ano/813568.shtml]
* The ball stays glued to his foot; I’ve seen great players in my career, but I’ve never seen anyone with Messi's ball control.
** [[w:Diego Maradona|Diego Maradona]], 2010 [http://archiviostorico.corriere.it/2010/aprile/08/Controllo_corsa_tocco_palla_Perche_co_9_100408088.shtml]
* He is probably the best player of the last 20 years. He is such a slippery player. Because of his height and quickness he is difficult to pin down and his balance is exceptional.
** [[w:Ryan Giggs|Ryan Giggs]], 2011 [http://www.tribalfootball.com/articles/barcelona-s-messi-best-player-last-20-years-man-utd-s-giggs-1880781]
* He is an exceptional talent. I still think Diego Maradona is the best player I have ever seen – but Messi is closing in fast. He's a wonderful sight in full flight and we are lucky to have him around.
** [[w:Ruud Gullit|Ruud Gullit]], 2011 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/players/lionel-messi/7537718/Barcelona-v-Arsenal-what-theyre-saying-about-Lionel-Messi.html]
* Leo is a virtuoso. He does things with the ball that just seem impossible. He's got great ability. His control of the ball when he is running at high speed is excellent. He has a superb shot. There is precision in his passing. To summarise... he's got everything. He has every single attribute you would want to find in a player.
** [[w:Sergio Batista|Sergio Batista]], 2011 [https://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/jonathanstevenson/2011/05/messi_chat.html]
* If Gary Lineker is saying that Messi is making him realise just how sh*t he was — then imagine how the rest of us feel.
** [[wikipedia:Julio_Salinas|Julio Salinas]], 2012 [https://footiecentral.com/top-100-quotes-on-lionel-messi/ &lt;nowiki&gt;[156]&lt;/nowiki&gt;]
* My record stood for 40 years - 85 goals in 60 games - and now the best player in the world has broken it, and I'm delighted for him. He is an incredible player, gigantic.
** [[w:Gerd Müller|Gerd Müller]], 2012 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/players/lionel-messi/9734839/Lionel-Messi-hailed-as-incredible-and-gigantic-by-Gerd-Muller-after-Barcelona-star-breaks-record-for-most-goals.html]
* Technically, we’re practically at the same level.
** [[w:Pele|Pele]], 2012, [https://www.thestar.com/sports/soccer/2012/01/20/leo_messi_pales_in_comparison_with_pele_says_pele.html]
* His control and technique while going at full speed is unique in the world.
** [[w:Sandro Mazzola|Sandro Mazzola]], 2012 [http://www.uefa.com/community/news/newsid=1908027.html]
* Messi will be the player to win the most Ballons d'Or in history. He will win five, six, seven. He is incomparable. He's in a different league.
** [[w:Johan Cruyff|Johan Cruyff]], 2012 [http://www.foxsports.com.au/football/barcelona-superstar-lionel-messi-worlds-best-football-player-wins-third-successive-ballon-dor/story-e6frf423-1226240395287?nk=b2e2ed0f4c02ab457e62688f03e06388]
* For me, Messi is the greatest. I played with Romario, Rivaldo, Ronaldo, Michael Laudrup and Stoichkov but Messi is the best I’ve seen. He has evolved in a way that nobody could expect.
** [[w:Albert Ferrer|Albert Ferrer]], 2012 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/chelsea/9215314/Albert-Ferrer-fears-Chelsea-could-be-pulled-apart-by-Lionel-Messis-Barcelona-on-sprawling-Nou-Camp-pitch.html]
* When it comes down to natural talent there’s no one who’s at Messi’s level.
** [[w:Willy Sagnol|Willy Sagnol]], 2012 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/28251/sagnol-convinced-messi-is-untouchable/]
* Messi is better than Maradona; he is more complete, more consistent, more spectacular. He is reinventing the game – a mix of the real and the virtual.
** [[w:Tostão|Tostão]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* Messi is better than Maradona and Pelé. Every week he shows that he is capable of things that no one had done until now. Messi defies the laws of anatomy, he must have an extra bone in his ankle.
** [[w:Carlos Bianchi|Carlos Bianchi]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* I can't believe anyone can have played the game of football as well as Messi.
** [[w:Michael Owen|Michael Owen]], 2012 [https://twitter.com/themichaelowen/status/177506734632484864]
* I think now he’s probably done more than most players.  But he is in the same class as Alfredo de Stefano, Johan Cruyff, Pelé.  When he finishes and he retires, he will automatically become one of them. A player that people will talk about forever, while the game of football is as good and as popular as it is. He is a sensational player.
** [[w:Bobby Charlton|Sir Bobby Charlton]], 2013 [http://www.laureus.com/news/interview-sir-bobby-charlton]
* Messi is simply the best player in the world. Messi is alone in his class as a player, it is impossible that there is another like him.
** [[w:David Beckham|David Beckham]], 2013 [http://www.espnfc.com/story/1410228/david-beckham-cristiano-ronaldo-is-not-at-lionel-messis-level]
* Messi is the best player I've ever seen, better than Maradona and Cruyff combined.
** [[w:Marcial Pina|Marcial Pina]], 2013 [http://www.lne.es/deportes/2013/06/21/messi-mejor-cruyff-maradona/1431082.html]
* Messi is Maradona every day. He has played at the level of Maradona in 1986 for the past five years.
** [[w:Jorge Valdano|Jorge Valdano]], 2013 [http://es.fifa.com/world-match-centre/news/newsid/219/194/9/index.html]
* I can only repeat what I have already said before and that is that Messi is the best in the world at the moment. It pains me to admit it, but it’s the simple truth.
** [[w:Guti (footballer)|José Guti]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/77070/guti-messi-is-the-best/]
* Newton and Einstein also had a certain level of autism. I hope that like them, Messi surpasses himself every day and continues giving us his beautiful brand of football.
** [[w:Romário|Romário]], 2013 [http://www.marca.com/2013/09/09/en/football/barcelona/1378751117.html]
* What’s really incredible is his consistency. It’s practically inhuman to keep going like him. What Messi has achieved, far outweighs what Cristiano has done. 
** [[wikipedia:Santiago_Solari|Santiago Solari]], 2013 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2013/03/02/3792291/messis-performances-practically-inhuman-says-solari &lt;nowiki&gt;[155]&lt;/nowiki&gt;]
* When Messi has the ball at his feet he can do things that you can’t imagine.
** [[w:Javier Zanetti|Javier Zanetti]], 2013 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/89425/zanetti-ronaldo-is-good-but-messi-is-the-best/]
* There is only one player who is doing things that I could never do and that is Messi.
** [[w:Francesco Totti|Francesco Totti]], 2013 [http://sports.yahoo.com/news/totti-only-messi-better-092500661--sow.html]{{deadlink}}
* He's the great player of this generation, like there were great players in other generations.
** [[w:Michel Platini|Michel Platini]], 2013 [http://vietnamnews.vn/print/219567/football-platini-lauds-ballon-dor-successor-messi.htm]
* Messi produces more pieces of exceptional skill in a single game than I managed in an entire career.
** [[w:Gary Lineker|Gary Lineker]], 2014 [https://twitter.com/GaryLineker/status/443858708465221632]
* Messi is a genius. He has everything. When I watch him I see a player who is very, very skilful, very clever and his left foot is like Diego Maradona's.
** [[w:Franz Beckenbauer|Franz Beckenbauer]], 2014 [http://uk.reuters.com/article/2014/11/22/uk-soccer-spain-messi-idUKKCN0J60Q820141122]
* Big congratulations to Messi, the magician, the artist, the genius. What more words can I use to describe this guy? Twenty-seven years old and broken the Champions League record from Raúl. Possibly one of the hardest players I’ve played against in my time in the game. The left foot. It’s beautiful. At the moment this guy’s taking liberties with everyone.
** [[w:Rio Ferdinand|Rio Ferdinand]], 2014 [http://www.squawka.com/news/rio-ferdinand-hails-genius-lionel-messi-after-he-breaks-champions-league-record/231164]
* There's a special part of Messi's brain allowing him to see the split-second chaos of football in his own personal super slow motion.
** [[w:Carles Puyol|Carles Puyol]], 2014 [http://m.espn.go.com/soccer/blogs/blogpost?w=1f8ef&amp;i=TOP&amp;id=2088115&amp;topslot=1&amp;wjb=]
* Messi is really a different class. To win four consecutive Ballon d'Ors is a great achievement.
** [[w:Ronaldo|Ronaldo]], 2014 [http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/sports/football/world-cup-2014/interviews/Fit-Neymar-can-win-the-World-Cup-for-us-Ronaldo/articleshow/36331745.cms]
* The Messi of the early years was a phenomenon, but he always wanted to finish off the move. Now he goes past one, two or three players and is happy to give an assist to a team-mate - it makes him more dangerous and more difficult to stop than ever before.
** [[w:Michael Laudrup|Michael Laudrup]], 2014 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/12/spain/2014/10/24/5436401/selfless-messi-is-more-dangerous-than-ever-laudrup]
* He's the first genius of the 21st century.
** [[w:Jorge Valdano|Jorge Valdano]], 2014 [http://www.goal.com/en-sg/news/3882/spain/2014/05/17/4823638/valdano-messi-the-first-genius-of-the-21st-century]
* I am not ashamed to admit that in the games against Barcelona I spent a lot of the time just hoping he would take up positions as far away from me as possible.
** [[w:Paul Scholes|Paul Scholes]], 2015 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/news-and-comment/paul-scholes-column-lionel-messi-is-a-genius-and-it-only-takes-a-second-for-him-to-trick-you-into-doing-something-daft--i-should-know-10057647.html]
* I think about the great players with whom I have shared a pitch: Eric Cantona, Zinedine Zidane, Pirlo, Xavi, Cristiano Ronaldo – and the greatest of them all is Messi.
** [[w:Paul Scholes|Paul Scholes]], 2015 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/news-and-comment/paul-scholes-column-you-cant-beat-barcelona-at-their-own-game--juventus-must-defend-and-hit-them-on-counterattack-10298216.html]
* He's a problem solver, a game changer, the greatest player to have played the game. I am more than 60 years old now, and I don't believe that I've seen, or that I'm likely to see, anyone better in my lifetime. The world's best when I was growing up was Pele and he would have been a great player now, too, but Messi surpasses him. He's also way out ahead of Diego Maradona - it's not even close anymore.
** [[w:Graeme Souness|Graeme Souness]], 2015 [http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/graeme-souness-lionel-messi-best-5673468]
* I was lucky enough to play with Zidane, Ronaldo, Figo, Cristiano... but Messi is different; he makes everything look so easy, so effortless – even the impossible.
** [[w:Raúl (footballer)|Raúl]], 2015 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/babb/11577257/Real-Madrid-icon-Raul-says-Lionel-Messi-is-the-greatest-player-hes-ever-seen.html]
* Messi makes the difference. I think he has reached and surpassed the level of Maradona.
** [[w:Paolo Maldini|Paolo Maldini]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/ChampionsLeague/status/606751034208329728]
* The best by far is Messi. Second is Maradona, third is Pele and Di Stefano. Fifth is Cruyff, Zidane or Pele.
** [[w:José Luis Chilavert|José Luis Chilavert]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/barca/jose-luis-chilavert-messi-the-best-all-time-far-3927554]
* Not often I sit and watch football and chuckle at how good someone is.
** [[w:Matt Le Tissier|Matt Le Tissier]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/mattletiss7/status/578291760100712448]
* Messi is the real deal when it comes to No10s. He represents a type of football that transcends borders.
** [[w:Alessandro del Piero|Alessandro del Piero]], 2015 [http://m.fifa.com/ballon-dor/news/y=2015/m=1/news=del-piero-ronaldo-is-the-future-2504045.html]
* Messi is the best in the world by far; for me, nobody comes close.
** [[w:Ian Wright|Ian Wright]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4XvAfwx7VY]
* What Messi does is terrifying. It’s indescribable magic. You can’t analyze it.
** [[w:César Luis Menotti|César Luis Menotti]], 2015 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/menotti-rinde-culto-magia-messi-3944468]
* I love Messi. Who doesn't? He's from another planet. An extraordinary player.
** [[w:Gabriel Batistuta|Gabriel Batistuta]], 2015 [http://www.ole.com.ar/seleccion/Batistuta-elogios-Messi_0_1376862552.html]
* Messi has been the best player of the last 10 years. He played at the same level for 10 years.
** [[w:Pelé|Pelé]], 2015 [http://www.101greatgoals.com/blog/pele-lionel-messi-player-world-10-years-video/]
* I never ever thought I would say that there was a better player than Maradona since he was in my time and I was in awe of him, but I honestly think for a number of reasons that Messi has surpassed him. He can do anything that Maradona did, and he does it more frequently and consistently.
** [[w:Gary Lineker|Gary Lineker]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IraqA3uSygk]
* He's head and shoulders above anyone I've seen. He's an alien. He's better now than he was four years ago because he reads the game better. He's unstoppable.
** [[w:Carles Puyol|Carles Puyol]], 2015 [http://www.lavanguardia.com/deportes/futbol/20150627/54432559147/carles-puyol-seguir-sin-cobrar.html]
* Barcelona have a great team with one special player, Messi. He is able to unlock a game from out of nowhere. Cristiano Ronaldo has been putting in spectacular performances, but there really is no comparison with Messi. Messi is on another level than all the other players. He is the undisputed best. No player has the ability to do what he does.
** [[w: Miguel Ángel Nadal|Miguel Ángel Nadal]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2015/07/16/13629532/cristiano-ronaldo-no-match-for-messi-says-nadal]
* He can hurt you 40 metres away from goal, not because he takes the ball and starts dribbling past opponents, but because on top of that he can also create the definitive goal chance. The god of football started playing, he is unstoppable when he starts playing. If you think otherwise, ask Jerome Boateng or all those fantastic players that face him.
** [[w:Francisco José Carrasco|Lobo Carrasco]], 2015 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/596/exclusive/2015/07/22/13783172/messi-better-now-than-he-was-in-2009]
* Messi is the best I’ve ever seen. I don’t dish out praise lightly but Messi deserves it. I look for weaknesses in his game and I can’t find them.
** [[w:Roy Keane|Roy Keane]], 2015 [http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/european/lionel-messi-is-the-barcelona-forward-the-greatest-of-them-all-10287066.html]
* He really is from a different planet. Even if you are supporting another team you have to admit this.
** [[w:Patrick Kluivert|Patrick Kluivert]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/patrickkluivert/status/596049093824090112]
* Messi is the Pelé of my generation. I don't understand the criticism of him. You cannot criticize a player like Messi.
** [[w:Juliano Belletti|Juliano Belletti]], 2015 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/belletti-messi-pele-generacion-4372158]
* I heard an interview with Sir Alex Ferguson where he revealed his greatest players of all time. He said Messi was in a category of his own. I am a big fan of Diego Maradona but Messi is a phenomenon. His performances at club level are unbelievable. You can play a season or two like that, but not all these years. He set the bar very high from the start.
** [[w:Georgi Kinkladze|Georgi Kinkladze]], 2015 [http://www.uefa.com/uefasupercup/news/newsid=2265854.html]
* He doesn't have the personality to be a leader.
** [[w:Diego Maradona|Diego Maradona]], 2016 [http://www.firstpost.com/sports/diego-maradonas-criticism-lionel-messi-divides-argentina-2829420.html]
* Sometimes I ask myself if Messi is human
** [[w: Thierry Henry|Thierry Henry]], 2016 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GGMaz93kgs]
* Every player on the planet is in Messi's shadow. If you want to step out of Messi's shadow, you should try another sport.
**  [[w: Thierry Henry|Thierry Henry]], 2018 [https://www.soccerladuma.co.za/news/articles/international/categories/messi-ronaldo-neymar-watch-1/thierry-henry-explains-controversial-neymar-lionel-messi-comments/288960]

=== From football figures ===

* I have never seen a player like him, with so much quality and audacity at his age, in a so important a stadium and with that shirt. He has everything. He has an extraordinary future - I'd love to bring him to Juve!
** [[w:Fabio Capello|Fabio Capello]], manager of [[Juventus F.C.|Juventus]], 2005 [https://www.infobae.com/2005/08/25/206219-el-mundo-aplaude-messi]
* When I see Messi - who is the best player in the world in my opinion - lose the ball, he runs off until he gets it back or commits a foul. Our guys lose the ball and fold their arms.
** [[w:Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva|Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva]], president of [[w:Brazil|Brazil]], 2008 [http://www.dnaindia.com/sport/report-lionel-messi-is-the-worlds-best-footballer-1187854]
* What Messi brings to a team, no other player can bring.
** [[w:Mauricio Pochettino|Mauricio Pochettino]], manager of [[w:RCD Espanyol|Espanyol]], 2009 [http://www.goal.com/en/news/12/spain/2009/12/11/1681171/without-lionel-messi-barcelona-lose-the-best-player-in-the-world-]
*If you're speaking of a fantasy player, then it has to be Leo Messi as he is so unpredictable.
** [[w:Fabio Capello|Fabio Capello]], manager of [[w:England national football team|England]], 2009 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1216376/Fabio-Capellos-fantasy-football-Lionel-Messi-pick-genius-Ronaldo-second-Wayne-Rooney-gets-mention.html]
* [How to stop Messi?] You need to bring a shotgun, pam-pam and that's it.
** [[w:Gregorio Manzano|Gregorio Manzano]], manager of [[w:RCD Mallorca|Mallorca]], 2010 [http://m.goal.com/s/en/news/1844965/]
* Messi is the best player I’ve seen in my life. Not just better but much better. Much faster. Much, much more skilful.
** [[w:Miguel Ángel Lotina|Miguel Ángel Lotina]], manager of [[w:Deportivo de La Coruña|Deportivo]], 2010 [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1260692/Jeff-Powell-Maestro-Messi--This-genius-nearest-thing-Ive-seen-Maradona.html]
* I think he is certainly one of the best in the world and people are right to make comparisons with Diego Maradona. It’s amazing when you think he is still only 22-years-old. He’s just a fantastic player.
** [[w:Christian Gross|Christian Gross]], manager of [[w:VfB Stuttgart|Stuttgart]], 2010 [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/competitions/champions-league/7470536/Barcelonas-Lionel-Messi-hailed-as-good-as-Diego-Maradona-after-breathtaking-display.html]
* Put in the superlatives yourselves, I'm running out. It's already been a while now that he has been outstanding. That he's capable of doing everything that he does at his age is something impressive, that doesn't make any sense.
** [[Pep Guardiola]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|Barcelona]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2010/mar/22/lionel-messi-barcelona]
* Messi has once again shown that he is a wonderful player and that he is, without doubt, the leader of Barcelona. He is the best player in the world and the best in the history of football. Along with Cruyff and Maradona, he is the best player we have seen at Barça.
** [[w:Joan Laporta|Joan Laporta]], president of [[w:FC Barcelona|Barcelona]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2010/mar/22/lionel-messi-barcelona]
* Tonight, I saw Diego Maradona, but at more revs per minute. There are no words left to describe him – he is interplanetary. We could have beaten Barcelona but we could never have beaten Leo Messi. If we had scored four, he would have scored 12.
** [[w:José Aurelio Gay|José Aurelio Gay]], manager of [[w:Real Zaragoza|Real Zaragoza]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2010/mar/22/leo-messi-barcelona-la-liga-spain]
* Messi is like a Playstation.
** [[w:Arsène Wenger|Arsène Wenger]], manager of [[w:Arsenal F.C.|Arsenal]], 2010 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2010/apr/07/barcelona-arsenal-lionel-messi]
* You cannot compare anyone to Messi. Cristiano Ronaldo is a great human player, but Messi is a Martian.
** [[w:Alfio Basile|Alfio Basile]], manager of [[w:Racing Club de Avellaneda|Racing Club]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/3277/la-liga/2012/07/29/3273637/cristiano-ronaldo-is-a-great-human-player-but-messi-is-a-martian-]
* I don't know the parameters for the Ballon d'Or. I only know that Messi deserves to win every trophy.
** [[w:Manuel Pellegrini|Manuel Pellegrini]], manager of [[w:Málaga CF|Málaga]], 2012 [http://www.goal.com/en-us/news/88/spain/2012/05/03/3078126/pellegrini-messi-deserves-to-win-every-individual-honor]
* Diego Maradona filled us with emotions. But between the cracks, without doubt, Messi is better than Maradona.
** [[w:Diego Simeone|Diego Simeone]], manager of [[w:Atlético Madrid|Atlético Madrid]], 2012 [http://www.marca.com/2012/12/30/futbol/equipos/atletico/1356896765.html]
* Whoever plays football knows that there are no words for Messi. He is a category all of his own: the best player in the world, another galaxy.
** [[w:Robin Dutt|Robin Dutt]], manager of [[w:Bayer Leverkusen|Bayer Leverkusen]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/08/lionel-messi-five-goals]
* Messi is like an Oliver Twist character, picking a pocket or two, the Artful Dodger, where he’s just sort of slipping around, looking like a little lad in the playground. He’s not really taking it seriously, and he makes you smile every time he gets the ball. And when he does some of these things, I have to laugh because it’s not possible what he does. It’s wonderful to watch. It’s just wonderful to see. You’ve got to pinch yourself sometimes, it’s really amazing what he does.
** [[w:Terry Venables|Terry Venables]], former manager of [[w:England national football team|England]], 2012 [http://keepingscore.blogs.time.com/2012/01/26/the-experts-weigh-in-messi-may-be-the-best-of-all-time-except-for-one-thing/]
* Look at Lionel Messi – he gets kicked every week. Everybody wants to kick Messi because it is the only way to stop him, but all he ever does is sort of smile, get up and get on with it, and then does it again.
** [[w:David Moyes|David Moyes]], manager of [[w:Everton F.C.|Everton]], 2013 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2013/feb/26/marouane-fellaini-everton-oldham]
* Messi is just a one-off, a freak of nature, who sees and does things nobody else sees or does. 
** [[w:Guillem Balagué|Guillem Ballagué]], football expert on [[w:Sky Sports|Sky Sports]], 2013 [http://www.skysports.com/football/news/12087/8452615/guillem-balague-previews-the-copa-del-rey-clasico-between-real-madrid-and-barcelona]
* With respect to Leo, I don’t know what can I say. Nothing surprises me with him. He controls the game well, passes the ball well, he is a good finisher, he can press and recover the ball. He is a footballer that can do everything. He sees passes that most people can only see whilst watching the game on TV or in the stands, not ones that you can normally see on the field.
** [[w:Gerardo Martino|Gerardo Martino]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|Barcelona]], 2014 [http://www.thenational.ae/sport/barcelona/he-is-a-footballer-that-can-do-everything-says-martino-after-another-messi-display]
* When he gets going, he creates panic. You have to have a perfect game to stop him.
** [[w:Luis García (footballer, born 1972)|Luis García]], manager of [[w:Getafe CF|Getafe CF]], 2014 [http://www.insidespanishfootball.com/94774/luis-garcia-you-have-to-be-perfect-to-stop-messi/]
* Messi is from another galaxy. Fans get used to it, but what he does is not normal.
** [[w:Rodolfo Borell|Rodolfo Borell]], former [[w:Liverpool F.C.|Liverpool]] youth coach, 2015 [http://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/fc-barcelona/20150219/54426308722/rodolfo-borrell.html]
* He’s like a kid at school playing against a load of kids who can’t play, it’s incredible. It’s so silly; he’s on another planet, just amazing.
** [[w:Harry Redknapp|Harry Redknapp]], former manager of [[w:England national football team|England]], 2015 [http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11095/9872694/harry-redknapp-lionel-messi-is-on-another-planet]
* Of course life is easier with Lionel Messi. He does all sorts of things. We see that every day. He is from another planet.
** [[w:Luis Enrique (footballer)|Luis Enrique]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|FC Barcelona]], 2015 [http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/season=2015/matches/round=2000551/match=2014428/postmatch/quotes/]
* I've never seen a better player than Messi. He's so good that he can even get around the three players you send after him and still notice the two teammates he has in space. It'll be hard to ever see another player like him.
** [[w:Fran Escribá|Fran Escribá]], manager of [[w:Elche CF|Elche]], 2015 [http://www.marca.com/en/2015/01/24/en/football/barcelona/1422104727.html]
* Messi has creativity, imagination, he can go straight for goal... He can pass like nobody else in the world. Messi is in another dimension.
** [[w:Fabio Capello|Fabio Capello]], manager of [[w:Russia national football team|Russia]], 2015 [http://www.sport-english.com/en/news/barca/fabio-capello-leo-messi-the-best-the-world-cristiano-ronaldo-the-best-madrid-4098351]
* Messi is best player ever. Some say Pele, Cruyff or Maradona, but none of them was as decisive as Messi.
** [[w:Ronald Koeman|Ronald Koeman]], manager of [[w:Southampton F.C.|Southampton]], 2015 [http://www.cope.es/detalle/Entrevista-a-Koeman-en-El-Partido-de-las-12-08-06-2015.html]
* Messi is the number one footballer in the world. No other player in the past few years comes close.
** [[w:Diego Simeone|Diego Simeone]], manager of [[w:Atlético Madrid|Atlético Madrid]], 2015 [http://www.tycsports.com/noticias/Simeone-y-la-importancia-de-la-Copa-America-20150620-0001.html]
* Messi proves himself nearly every game. Despite his immense talent, he remains very modest. I like that in him and I respect Messi a lot.
** [[w:Louis van Gaal|Louis van Gaal]], manager of [[w:Manchester United F.C.|Manchester United]], 2015 [http://www.marca.com/en/2015/07/06/en/football/barcelona/1436203933.html]
* I feel sad when the best player in the world is chosen, and I see, for example, that the Portuguese coach—my friend Fernando Santos—does not place Messi among the top three. It's absurd. As a Portuguese man, I will say that Ronaldo is the best in the world. Messi is from another planet.
** [[w:Jorge Nuno Pinto da Costa|Pinto da Costa]], president of [[w:FC Porto|FC Porto]], 2015 [http://deportes.elpais.com/deportes/2015/07/19/actualidad/1437333518_715731.html]
* Messi's ability to play at the highest level with Barcelona and their consistency is what wins them these titles.
** [[w:Unai Emery|Unai Emery]], manager of [[w:Sevilla FC|Sevilla]], 2015 [https://twitter.com/ChampionsLeague/status/631227153124851712]
* I applaud what he does and I hope the crowd enjoyed and will remember what he does. We are fortunate to be around while the best is playing. It is a pleasure to have him with us. Today was a real show. He is the best there is and there has been.
** [[w:Ernesto Valverde|Ernesto Valverde]], manager of [[w:FC Barcelona|FC Barcelona]], 2018 [https://www.fcbarcelona.com/football/first-team/news/2017-2018/ernesto-valverde-it-was-a-question-of-persistence-post-game-reactions-players-betis-fc-barcelona-villamarin-0-5]

=== From media figures ===

* Simply stellar, proud and majestic. He is the re-incarnation of Maradona.
** Enrique Yunta of [[w:ABC (newspaper)|ABC]], 2007 [http://www.abc.es/hemeroteca/historico-11-03-2007/abc/Deportes/y-maradona-se-reencarno_1631918623996.html#]
* You can forget the Little Donkey, the Rabbit, the Clown and all the other great pretenders, it's the Flea with the fast feet and fabulous control who gets closest to el Diego. He may not have the same the strutting confidence or the big mouth - in fact, he makes whispering Ted Lowe sound like a town crier - but there's definitely something about Messi.
** Sid Lowe of [[w:The Guardian|The Guardian]], 2007 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2007/mar/12/europeanfootball.sport1]
* I have played against Platini, Maradona, Cruyff and played with George Best — a lot of big names, but none of them has been able to do what Messi does. Two years ago I said that the best player I played against was Maradona and the best player I have played with was Bestie. But I can now say I have never seen a player as good as Messi. He’s in a league of his own.
** [[w:Gerry Armstrong (footballer)|Gerry Armstrong]], 2010 [http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/football/european/gerry-armstrong-lionel-messi-is-the-greatest-28526228.html]
* They say all men are equal in god's eyes. This player makes you seriously think about those words.
** [[w:Ray Hudson|Ray Hudson]], 2012 [http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1036161-lionel-messi-hat-trick-video-watch-ray-hudson-lose-mind-over-barcelona-star]
* If he is so good, how can you express that? The superlatives ran out ages ago. On these pages, swearing has been tried. Or perhaps a symbol, something to signify that we have gone beyond words now.
** Sid Lowe of [[w:The Guardian|The Guardian]], 2012 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2012/mar/21/lionel-messi-record-goalscorer-barcelona]
* There are three or four important things in life: books, friends, women, and Messi.
** [[w:António Lobo Antunes|António Lobo Antunes]], 2012 [http://elpais.com/diario/2012/01/14/babelia/1326503558_850215.html]
* Are there any adjectives and superlatives left to describe little Leo? Messi is unstoppable and we should feel privileged to be watching a player who may be the best of all time.
** Pedro Pinto of [[w:CNN|CNN]], 2012 [http://worldsport.blogs.cnn.com/2012/12/28/fantasy-football-pedro-pintos-team-of-2012/]
* I like Messi because he doesn’t think he’s Messi.
** [[w:Eduardo Galeano|Eduardo Galeano]], 2013 [http://www.fifa.com/world-match-centre/news/newsid/198/641/1/index.html]
* Here he is again ... here he is again .. that's astonishing, absolutely world-class!
** [[w:Martin Tyler|Martin Tyler]], 2015 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Br024vDcgik]
* Messi saved football. There has never been such an overwhelming, devastating, decisive and unique player.
** [[w:Juan García Esquivel|Esquivel]], 2015 [http://www.sport.es/es/noticias/barca/carlos-esquivel-messi-salvado-futbol-3927310]
* At the Camp Nou Messi scored two brilliant goals, made a third and at times yawned his way around champion opponents like a man tactfully avoiding a gaggle of overheated toddlers in a high street coffee shop. Often he took the ball and shimmied past two or three men, operating within a kind of fermata, events slowed and paused around him, and providing a reminder that he remains one of the great dribblers, master of the flip-flap, the surge, the amphetamine-crazed-millipede shift of feet.
** Barney Ronay of [[w:The Guardian|The Guardian]], 2015 [https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2015/may/07/lionel-messi-barcelona-bayern-munich]
* People think I am an admirer of Messi. No, you are all wrong. I am an admirer of genius in football. The greatest footballer that I have ever seen in my life.
** [[w:Ray Hudson|Ray Hudson]], 2018, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXyNxBAJ2gM]
*He was beautiful. He was the point of difference. He has always been the point of difference. Unparalleled, and maybe today there will, of course, always be those who argue, always be those who debate. And the debate could rage on if you like. But as he falls in love with the object in the world that his heart most desired, it is hard to escape the supposition that he has rendered himself today, the greatest of all time.
** [[w:Peter Drury|Peter Drury]], 2022, [https://www.sportskeeda.com/football/news-there-anybody-else-like-him-peter-drury-sums-lionel-messi-greatness-iconic-2022-fifa-world-cup-final-monologue]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commons category}}
{{wikinews}}
* [https://sites.google.com/view/messiorronaldo/home Opinions on Messi vs Ronaldo]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Messi, Lionel}}
[[Category:1987 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Soccer players from Argentina]]
[[Category:Ambassadors]]
[[Category:Philanthropists]]
[[Category:Catholics from Argentina]]
[[Category:People from Rosario]]
[[Category:UNICEF goodwill ambassadors]]
[[Category:World record holders]]</text>
      <sha1>pmp57n18llp5js3gqsoy5iaiqfytz94</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Threads (1984 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>176909</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964886</id>
      <parentid>3836561</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:15:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964886</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="40905" sha1="03x17udsmptm6ydzgblyajt5z6owl47" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. You cannot win a nuclear war! Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>03x17udsmptm6ydzgblyajt5z6owl47</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964887</id>
      <parentid>3964886</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:17:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3964887</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="41054" sha1="558z3d2ov9jr1td1knylz2k9e4gz902" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. You cannot win a nuclear war! Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>558z3d2ov9jr1td1knylz2k9e4gz902</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964888</id>
      <parentid>3964887</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:17:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Peace activist */</comment>
      <origin>3964888</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="41060" sha1="43qp1cmj60mklp01fa5f5logc5luazy" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>43qp1cmj60mklp01fa5f5logc5luazy</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964889</id>
      <parentid>3964888</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:21:15Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Narrator */</comment>
      <origin>3964889</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="41407" sha1="8aazy05a3wnutk9w1huhaf16v8rjgf8" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>8aazy05a3wnutk9w1huhaf16v8rjgf8</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964890</id>
      <parentid>3964889</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:23:30Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Wednesday 25 May */</comment>
      <origin>3964890</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="41592" sha1="clr7nkp3wu63o8k866i8rf13z17amof" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>clr7nkp3wu63o8k866i8rf13z17amof</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964893</id>
      <parentid>3964890</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:27:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Protect and Survive */</comment>
      <origin>3964893</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42073" sha1="ojs99rc4g9jet0tl7f0yvtv5dgac4n5" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Sterbekreuze - panoramio.jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>ojs99rc4g9jet0tl7f0yvtv5dgac4n5</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964895</id>
      <parentid>3964893</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:30:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Protect and Survive */</comment>
      <origin>3964895</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42247" sha1="fz2ru4hlp99xcav5bz3gjzbdyk4dai1" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>fz2ru4hlp99xcav5bz3gjzbdyk4dai1</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964896</id>
      <parentid>3964895</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:33:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* About Threads */</comment>
      <origin>3964896</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42497" sha1="huhel1cvomsxdny2mia90lf2524n0k8" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''The Day After'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>huhel1cvomsxdny2mia90lf2524n0k8</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964898</id>
      <parentid>3964896</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:35:35Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* About Threads */</comment>
      <origin>3964898</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42527" sha1="qmdcqamfsw5lm1s4ckhg1lxh116nqyz" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>qmdcqamfsw5lm1s4ckhg1lxh116nqyz</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964899</id>
      <parentid>3964898</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:37:06Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* About Threads */</comment>
      <origin>3964899</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42792" sha1="epyzzfkb3osb35o985w3r6f327d21ax" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>epyzzfkb3osb35o985w3r6f327d21ax</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964901</id>
      <parentid>3964899</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:37:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* About Threads */</comment>
      <origin>3964901</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="42805" sha1="9johjxgtmj4mchuwcl77j2y9878sixe" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>9johjxgtmj4mchuwcl77j2y9878sixe</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964903</id>
      <parentid>3964901</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:39:53Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Karen Meagher */</comment>
      <origin>3964903</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43093" sha1="tvliln1l4jq4cgtw2kgl9jmjhfistl2" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
[[File:Nuclear mushroom cloud of Fat Man.jpg|thumb|I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people. —[[Karen Meagher]]]]
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>tvliln1l4jq4cgtw2kgl9jmjhfistl2</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964904</id>
      <parentid>3964903</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:40:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3964904</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43243" sha1="bw3qtjvyx68ha6gd1nlfooknqg8h27r" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of British Airways and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.
[[File:Atomic cloud over Nagasaki from Koyagi-jima.jpeg|thumb|A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.]]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
[[File:Nuclear mushroom cloud of Fat Man.jpg|thumb|I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people. —[[Karen Meagher]]]]
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>bw3qtjvyx68ha6gd1nlfooknqg8h27r</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964905</id>
      <parentid>3964904</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:41:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Saturday 21 May */</comment>
      <origin>3964905</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43265" sha1="bku5516gsyjbrl7o9s18k5tdrtpyk7n" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the Bojnord. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;
===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of [[w:British Airways|British Airways]] and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.
[[File:Atomic cloud over Nagasaki from Koyagi-jima.jpeg|thumb|A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.]]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
[[File:Nuclear mushroom cloud of Fat Man.jpg|thumb|I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people. —[[Karen Meagher]]]]
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>bku5516gsyjbrl7o9s18k5tdrtpyk7n</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964906</id>
      <parentid>3964905</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:42:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Thursday 5 May */</comment>
      <origin>3964906</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43287" sha1="rlbcoflj28es1fvvlx3894sbdlcp7pw" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the [[w:Bojnord County|Bojnord]]. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;

===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the NATO headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in Brussels a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of [[w:British Airways|British Airways]] and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.
[[File:Atomic cloud over Nagasaki from Koyagi-jima.jpeg|thumb|A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.]]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
[[File:Nuclear mushroom cloud of Fat Man.jpg|thumb|I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people. —[[Karen Meagher]]]]
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>rlbcoflj28es1fvvlx3894sbdlcp7pw</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964908</id>
      <parentid>3964906</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:44:06Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Thursday 19 May */</comment>
      <origin>3964908</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43295" sha1="he4ebry4jmpgj3xv78lixz8el5ocijf" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Pear-shaped leucauge spider (Opadometa fastigata) webs.jpg|thumb|In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.]]
[[File:Flag of the United Kingdom.svg|thumb|Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|This time they are playing with at best the destruction of life as we know it and at worst total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a corpse of a country.]]
[[File:Northa_America_satellite_globe_2.jpg|thumb|Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods. ~ Narrator]]
[[File:WhSouthLawn.JPEG|thumb|It is 8:30 a.m.; 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest. ~ Narrator]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Threads_(1984_film)|Threads]]''''' is a 1984 British television docudrama account of a full-scale nuclear war and its effects on the city of [[Sheffield]] in [[w:Northern England|Northern England]].

==Narrator==
[[File:Anenurin Bevan, Minister of Health, on the first day of the National Health Service, 5 July 1948 at Park Hospital, Davyhulme, near Manchester (14465908720).jpg|thumb|The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. ]]
* In an urban society, everything connects. Each person's needs are fed by the skills of many others. Our lives are woven together in a fabric. But the connections that make society strong also make it vulnerable.

* Britain has emergency plans for war. If central government should ever fail, power can be transferred instead to a system of local officials dispersed across the country. In an urban district like Sheffield, there is already a designated wartime controller. He's the city's peacetime chief executive. If it should suddenly become necessary, he can be given full powers of internal government. When, or if, this happens depends on the crisis itself.

* In the last few days, emergency headquarters like this have been hastily improvised up and down the country, in the basements of town halls and civic centres.  

* Many of these officers have had no training at all. Some have learnt of their emergency role in the last few days, and almost all are unsure of their exact duties.

* It is 8:30 a.m. 3:30 in the morning in Washington. Over the past few days, neither the President nor his senior staff will have had more than a few hours rest. This is when they may be asleep. This is when Western response will be slowest.

* The first fallout dust settles on Sheffield. It's an hour and 25 minutes after the attack. An explosion on the ground at Crewe has sucked up this debris and made it radioactive. The wind has blown it here. This level of attack has broken most of the windows in Britain. Many roofs are open to the sky. Some of the lethal dust gets in. In these early stages, the symptoms of radiation sickness and the symptoms of panic are identical.

* Hanging in the atmosphere, the clouds of debris shut out the sun's heat and light. Across large areas of the Northern Hemisphere it starts to get dark, it starts to get cold. In the centers of large land masses like America or Russia, the temperature drop may be severe, as much as 25 degrees centigrade. Even in Britain, within days of the attack it could fall to freezing or below for long, dark periods.

* The entire peacetime resources of the British Heath Service, even if they survived, would be unable to cope with the effects of even the single bomb that's hit Sheffield. 

* By this time, without drugs, water or bandages, without electricity or medical support facilities, there is virtually no way a doctor can exercise his skill. As a source of help or comfort, he is little better equipped than the nearest survivor.

* Money has had no meaning since the attack. The only viable currency is food, given as reward for work or withheld as punishment. In the grim economics of the aftermath, there are two harsh realities. A survivor who can work gets more food than one who can't and the more who die, the more food is left for the rest.

* Detention camps are improvised to cope with looters. Their numbers are growing.

* A growing exodus from cities in search of food. It's July. The countryside is cold and full of unknown radiation hazards. By now, five to six weeks after the attack, deaths from the effects of fallout are approaching their peak. 

* Collecting this diminished first harvest is now literally a matter of life and death. 

* Chronic fuel shortages mean that this could be one of the last times tractors and combine harvesters are used in Britain.

* The first winter. The stresses of hypothermia, epidemic and radiation fall heavily on the very young and old. Their protective layers of flesh are thinner. In the first few winters, many of the young and old disappear from Britain.

==News reports==
===Saturday 5 March===
* ''[Radio announcement fragmentary due to Jimmy channel hopping]''  There's been further fighting in Iran between government and... as the civil war there...

===Thursday 5 May===
* ''[Footage with caption &quot;{{w|Norddeutscher Rundfunk|ndr}} film&quot;]'' This film, shot secretly by a West German television crew on Tuesday, shows one of the Soviet convoys on the move in northern [[Iran]]. The convoys were first spotted by United States satellites on Monday, moving across three of the mountain passes leading from the Soviet Union. The Soviet Foreign Minister has defended the incursions, and has accused the United States of deliberately prompting last week's coup in Iran. Speaking on his arrival in Vienna, [[Andrei Gromyko|Mr. Gromyko]] claims the Soviet vehicles were responding to appeals from legitimate government forces from the [[w:Bojnord County|Bojnord]]. He went on to define American covert activities in Iran in the period immediately preceding the coup as &quot;destabilising&quot;. He warned the United States of the dangers seeking in what he called &quot;an easy return to the reign of [[Mohammad Reza Pahlavi|the Shah]].&quot;

===Sunday 8 May===
* The United States has hinted it may send troops to the Middle East if the Russians don't move their forces out of Iran. The Prime Minister has joined the chorus of western leaders calling for immediate withdrawal and has spoken of a serious threat to world peace. Four people were killed today on the M6 motorway in Staffordshire when their car was in a collision with a heavy tanker. The accident happened at the junction with the A449 near Dunston.&lt;ref&gt;The location of the motorway incident is according to ''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 165.&lt;/ref&gt;

===Wednesday 11 May===
* On a day that has seen U.S. naval vessels in the Indian Ocean put on high alert, and on the eve of the Iran debate in the United Nations Security Council, this morning's report came as a bombshell to most Americans. Quoting sources close to the administration, the ''Washington Post'' says there's been a serious incident involving a United States warship in the waters off the coast of Iran. No further details are given in the story, attributed the paper's defence correspondent. However, one rumour, being heard increasingly in the Capitol this morning, says the vessel is a U.S. submarine that has disappeared whilst on routine patrol in the area. Coming just at the same time, the latest news of a Naval alert [...] has alarmed many people, by seeming to confirm that something very serious has happened. A Pentagon spokesman refused to be drawn one way or other on the crisis parrying all reporter's questions at his regular morning press briefing.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 167.&lt;/ref&gt;
===Thursday 12 May===
* BBC News at 8 o'clock: The Soviet Union has protested strongly to the United States about what it calls &quot;dangerous provocations&quot; by American warships in the Gulf of Oman yesterday. This follows an incident in which serious damage was caused to the Soviet cruiser ''Kirov'', when she was in collision with the U.S. destroyer ''Callaghan''.
* American and Israeli search and rescue vessels in the area today came across debris and oil slicks that could only have come from the missing submarine. It's still being said in Washington, that the ''Los Angeles'' was on a routine reconnaissance mission off the coast of Iran, when she sank last Tuesday with the loss of all hands. After paying tribute to her 127 officers and men, the President went on to say that he held the Soviet Union solely responsible for their deaths, and for the vessel's disappearance.
:''[The last clip was followed by an extract from speech by (then) United States president Ronald Reagan: see [[#Thursday 12 May 2|§ United States president → Thursday 12 May]].]''

===Tuesday 17 May===
:''[The only television extract for that day was a speech by Ronald Reagan, accompanied by footage of United States soldiers arriving in western Iran: see [[#Tuesday 17 May 3|§ United States president → Tuesday 17 May]].]''

===Thursday 19 May===
* The remaining units of the United States 10th Airborne Division, which parachuted into western Iran yesterday, have taken up defensive positions near Isfahan, designed, according the spokesman, to block any possible move towards the oilfields in the Persian Gulf. Squadrons of American B-52 bombers have been arriving at U.S. bases in Turkey since late on Tuesday evening, together with three AWACS early warning aircraft. It's believed that they'll be used in a supporting role to the Middle East task force. The 84th Airborne Division has also been placed on the state of combat readiness, and is set to be able to [...]
* Worldwide [...] about the superpower confrontation in the Middle East has increased [...] this evening . In a statement issued a short time ago by the Pentagon in Washington, the United States has accused the Soviet Union of moving nuclear warheads into their new base at Mashhad in northern Iran. According to the American spokesman, the war [...] aboard two giant Antonov transport planes late yesterday afternoon and were immediately moved undercover into temporary hangars. [...] predictable flurry of activity in and around the [[NATO]] headquarters. Among those arriving in the last half-hour [...] member countries. They entered the building swiftly, and do not comment on the reports at this stage. [...] a statement within the next hour or so. NATO's position on the United States' action in sending its task force to Iran has been cautious up to now [...] from which neither side could back down. Arriving here in [[Brussels]] a short time ago, NATO's Secretary General said he [...] in the Middle East. Whether the latest news [...] strengthens the divisions within NATO is something we should know in a few hour's time, when the full council of ministers meets in an emergency session to debate its response to the crisis [...] into London. And we've just heard that the Prime Minister has issued a message of support for the United States government. The statement, just released from Downing Street, condemns what it calls &quot;reckless Soviet actions, which can only worsen an already grave situation.&quot;

===Saturday 21 May===
* There's been no response from the Soviet government as yet to the United States ultimatum delivered to Moscow last night. The American note calls for joint withdrawal of all U.S. and Soviet forces from Iran by noon on Sunday. However, NATO observers in West Germany have reported increasing build-ups of Warsaw Pact troops and vehicles at points along the central frontier this morning. The Ministry of Defence has announced it's sending more troops to Europe to reinforce the British commitment to NATO. The first contingent left RAF Brize Norton this morning.
* The day has been marked by a number of demonstrations up and down the country, reflecting support for and against the government's decision to reinforce Europe. Although most of these passed off without incident, police made a number of arrests for disorderly conduct at rallies in the North and Midlands.
* The government has taken control of [[w:British Airways|British Airways]] and all cross-channel ferries: they say it's a temporary step to help move troops to Europe; thousands are stranded at Heathrow and Gatwick; and the Royal Navy is to guard the North Sea oil rigs: the MOD says it's a prudent, precautionary measure.

===Monday 23 May===
* Since the expiry of the American ultimatum to the Soviet Union at noon yesterday, there have been intense diplomatic efforts to mediate between the two countries. There is still no information from Iran itself: no news teams have been allowed in or out of the country since phone and telex links were cut on Friday evening. Questioned in the House this morning, the Foreign Secretary said he had no definite news to report, and that it would be unhelpful to speculate in the absence of any hard information from the area.
* There's been a run on tinned food, sugar, and other storable items, which is causing shortages in some areas. A spokesman for the main supermarket chain said that panic buying is unnecessary. Fuel shortages are hindering resupply in some areas, but overall there is no shortage of stocks. They urge the public to calm down, be patient [...]   
* In response to today's news of the outbreak of hostilities between vessels of the United States and Soviet navies, a special session of parliament has this evening passed an Emergency Powers Act. There'll be a special announcement at the end of this bulletin, and details will be given then of how this affects you. The Prime Minister is expected to address the nation on the international crisis later this evening. A statement, issued earlier from Downing Street, said the government is optimistic that a peaceful, negotiated settlement to the conflict is at hand. In the meantime, the public is urged to remain calm, and to continue normally. 

===Tuesday 24 May===
* Nevertheless, people are alarmed about the lack of advice or information from the government. Well, the policy of the government is quite clear on the matter, we are urging to people to keep calm, use their common sense and to go about their business as normal. Panic can only make matters worse. We all know the situation is serious but we are in constant touch with our allies in Washington and have firm assurance that it's under control.&lt;ref&gt;''Threads and other Sheffield Plays'' (1990), p. 184.&lt;/ref&gt; [...] proceed smoothly. Thank you Minister, and we've just had a newsflash from Bonn, that the Russians have cut the road links into and out of West Berlin. Radio and air communications with the city have apparently also been severed. Details are still coming in, but it seems an American army convoy bound for West Berlin has been turned back at {{w|Helmstedt–Marienborn border crossing|Helmstedt}} on the East German border. Unconfirmed reports say the Russians have offered a safe passage out of the city to the U.S., British and French garrisons. It's not clear if this move is connected with yesterday's riots in East Germany. We'll bring you more details on the story as soon as we have them.
* Local authorities have been given the power to suspend certain peacetime functions, and to requisition premises and materials for civil defence purposes. A government spokesman said that this was a precautionary move only: it was not a cause for alarm.
* The AA and RAC have reported heavy congestion on roads up and down the country, particularly those leading to Wales and the West Country. The police are urging motorists not to travel unless absolutely necessary, and if it is essential, to use only minor roads and leave motorways and intercity trunk routes clear for official traffic. A full list of designated Essential Service Routes is posted outside your local authority headquarters: it includes the M1, M18, A63 and A629.

===Wednesday 25 May===
[[File:Castle Bravo Blast.jpg|thumb|There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East.]]
* There's growing evidence overnight from scientists and observers in many countries that there have been two nuclear explosions in the Middle East. There's no official confirmation of what has happened, and the Foreign Office in London say they have no comment to make on the report. The evidence also points to two major explosions in Northern Iran on Sunday afternoon. The Swedish government [...] said yesterday that its instruments [...] recorded just before half past one and again at two o'clock our time [...] 100 kilotons were detonated, several times higher than the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The French news agency {{w|Agence France-Presse}} has [...] bright light [...] Unconfirmed reports from Islamabad, reaching London this morning, suggest [...] that radioactive debris may have fallen on parts of west[ern] Pakistan. According to the report [...] high levels of radiation were reported by army units in the region around {{w|Kharan District|Kharan}} and {{w|Qalat District|Qalat}}, near the country's border with Iran. The evacuation of the area is also reported.

==Wartime Broadcasting Service broadcasts==

{{see also|wikipedia:Wartime Broadcasting Service|l1=Wartime Broadcasting Service}} ''on the English Wikipedia''

* Radiation levels are still dangerous. Residents of Release Band A—that is Woodseats, Dore and Totley, and Abbeydale—should not stay out of their shelters for more than two hours per day. Residents of Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Banner Cross, and Broomhill—no longer than one hour per day.
* All able-bodied citizens—me[n], women and children—should report for reconstruction duties, commencing 08:00 hours tomorrow morning. The [in]habitants of Release Band A—that is Dore and Totley, Abbeydale, and Woodseats—should rendezvous in Abbeydale Park. Release Band B—that is Nether Edge, Broomhill, and Banner Cross—should rendezvous [...]&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;The poor quality of the emergency broadcast made &quot;Release Band A&quot; sound like &quot;Release Band F&quot;.&lt;/ref&gt;
* If we are to survive these difficult early months and establish [a] firm base for the redevelopment of our country, then we must concentrate all our energies on agricultural production.

==Newspaper headlines==
===Sunday 8 May===
* ''{{w|The Mail on Sunday}}''
** Afghanistan again! Red Army tanks go in
** 'Get Out!': U.S. warning to Moscow
* ''{{w|The Observer}}''
** I see Russians dig in around Mashad
** Soviet move 'Threat to Peace' says US: Moscow hits back at U.S. stage management
* ''{{w|Sunday Mirror}}''
** U.S. gets tough with Kremlin

===Tuesday 17 May===
* ''{{w|The Daily Telegraph}}'':
** Paratroops go in: U.S. acts on Iran: Landing sites near Isfahan
** NATO cautious on move: 'Considerable doubts'

===Sunday 22 May===
* ''The Mail on Sunday'' (poster):
** U.S. ultimatum expires today

===Tuesday 24 May===
* ''{{w|The Times}}'':
** Road links to Berlin are cut
** U.N. Chief's plea for stand off

===Wednesday 25 May===
* ''The Times'':
** War in Europe 'Can be avoided' says PM: Naval task force in position
** U.S. blockade of Cuba
** Rivals seek to end violence
** American Carrier sunk in Gulf battle

===Thursday 26 May===
Newspapers start carrying ''{{w|Protect and Survive}}'' inserts.
* ''{{w|Sheffield Star}}'':
** Iran crisis latest (poster)
* ''{{w|Daily Mirror}}''
** &quot;Stay calm!&quot; says P.M. (main headline)
** Turn to Centre Pages: Government Emergency Advice
** Wry Wolves (sport headline)

==''Protect and Survive''==
[[File:Ridpath's history of the world; being an account of the ethnic origin, primitive estate, early migrations, social conditions and present promise of the principal families of men (1897) (14780979404).jpg|thumb|If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial.]]
:''[The first two quotes are heard twice, at timestamps 39:13 and 42:58. On the second play of the second quote, the sound effects are omitted.]''
* The time has now come to make everything ready for you and your family, in case an air attack happens. This does not mean that war is bound to come, but there is a risk of this, and we must all be prepared for it.
* ''[attack warning]'' When you hear the attack warning, you and your family must take cover at once. Do not stay out of doors. If you are caught in the open, lie down. ''[first note of the theme]''
* If you leave your home, your local authority may take it over for homeless families. And if you move, the authorities in the new place will not help you with food, accommodation, or other essentials. You are better off in your own home. Stay there. ''[theme]''
* If anyone dies, while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address, and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets, or blankets. If however, you have had a body in your house for more than 5 days, and, if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth and mark the spot of the burial. ''[theme]''
* The most widespread danger is fall-out. Fall-out is dust, that is sucked up from the ground by the explosion. Fall-out can kill.

The following excepts were recorded by voice actors for ''Threads''. They are different from the actual radio broadcasts, which is held in the collections of the {{w|Imperial War Museums}}:&lt;ref&gt;''[http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Protect and Survive]'' (Radio broadcast). London: Central Office of Information. 1980. 22202. [https://web.archive.org/web/20250126143404/http://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/80020615 Archived] from the original on 26 January 2025. Retrieved 4 November 2025 – via IWM Collections.&lt;/ref&gt;

* Here are some ideas for making your inner refuge. One. Make a ‘lean-to’ with sloping doors or strong boards rested against an inner wall. Prevent them from slipping by fixing a length of wood along the floor. Build further protection of bags or boxes of earth or sand, or books, or even clothing, on the slope of your refuge, and anchor these also against slipping. Partly close [...]
* Have you made your inner refuge, inside the fall-out room? Have you strengthened it with dense materials? Have you put the following items in your fall-out room: enough water, in sealed or covered containers, to last you and your family for 14 days; enough food to last you and your family for 14 days, including tinned or powdered milk for the children, and food for the baby - and a closed cupboard or cabinet in which to store these supplies; a portable radio with spare batteries; a tin opener, bottle opener, cutlery, crockery and cooking utensils; improvised lavatory seat, polythene buckets fitted with covers, polythene bag linings, for emptying the containers, strong disinfectant and toilet paper; candles and matches [...]

==Peace activist==
* This time they are playing with, at best, the destruction of life as we know it, and at worst, total annihilation. '''You cannot win a nuclear war!''' Now just suppose the Russians did win this war... What exactly would they be winning? What would they have conquered? Well, I'll tell you! All major centres of population and industry would have been destroyed. [Heckler: &quot;Industry? What industry? We ain't got no industry in Sheffield!&quot;] Yes, and if the money hadn't - ''[trying to make herself heard amongst the jeers]'' if the money hadn't - if the money hadn't been spent on nuclear weapons, you would have built up industry. We would have put money into welfare, we would have found alternative sources of energy. Industry... ''[pauses for applause]'' Industry will have been destroyed. The soil would have been irradiated. Farmstock would be dead, diseased or dying. The Russians would have conquered a ''corpse'' of a country.

==Sheffield District Emergency Headquarters==

===Home Office telex to Clive Sutton===

:''Timestamp: 13:50''

* As a result of decisions taken in Cabinet last night, and passed to the Home secretary for implementation, you are requested to undertake an initial review of the Emergency Arrangements listed [...] You will, of course, take care that any such review is carried out with discretion and does not cause undue public alarm [...]

===List of officers===
:''[The list is partially obscured, and some initials were expanded from Clive Sutton's telephone conversation. Timestamp: 15:14]''

* Emergency Committee - {{abbr|Cllrs.|Councillors}} Flint, Langdon,  Matthews
* Controller - Clive J. Sutton
* Deputy Controller - Alan Boulton
* Works Officer - George Cox
* Food Officer - Roger Fisher
* Manpower Officer - Susan Russell&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Sharon (the first name of the actress who played the Manpower Officer) at timestamp 1:03:54.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Environmental Health Officer - D. [...]
* Homelessness Officer(s) - Tony Barnes, Roy Chamberlain
* Information Officer - D. Talbot&lt;ref group=&quot;N&quot;&gt;Referred to as Steve (the first name of the actor who played the Information Officer) at timestamp 38:29.&lt;/ref&gt;
* Scientific Advisers - Keith H[...], A. Jennings, Charles [...]
* District Inland Transport Co-ordinator - James Lee

==United States president==
===Thursday 12 May===
:''See also: [[#Thursday 12 May|§ News reports, Thursday 12 May]]''
* The unprovoked attack on our submarine, and the move into [[Iran]], are the actions of a reckless and warlike power. I have to warn the [[Soviet Union|Soviets]] in the clearest possible terms that they risk taking us to the brink of an armed confrontation, with incalculable consequences for all mankind.

===Tuesday 17 May===
* The United States government has been forced, reluctantly, to take action to safeguard what it believes are legitimate Western interests in the Middle East. This administration has therefore resolved to send units of its rapid deployment force, the U.S. Central Command, into western Iran. We are confident that the Soviet Union will take note of our resolve, and will desist from its present perilous course of action.

==Dialogue==
[[File:Lob Жаворонки 95.jpg|thumb|A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... BASTARDS!]]
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Ruth, Ruth love, come on love, you'll have to eat something. You'll have to love, it's not just you now you know, the baby needs food as well.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' ''[crying]'' I don't care about this baby anymore, I wish it was dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' Oh Ruth! Don't say things like that.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' There's no point! There's no point with Jimmy dead.
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' But you don't know...
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' He is! He is! I ''know'' he is!
:'''Mrs. Beckett:''' You can't be certain.
:'''Ruth Beckett:''' We're breathing in all this radiation all the time. My baby. It will be ugly and deformed. ''[sobs]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've not heard from county yet.
:'''Food Officer:''' If we don't release some food now, we'll never get things under control!
:'''Information Officer:''' ''You'' try getting through to them! It's bloody hopeless.
:'''Food Officer:''' I've got starving mobs in Sharrow, Ecclesfield...
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, it's not our decision anyway! It's up to Zone to authorise the release of buffer stocks and then it becomes a County decision.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We can't get through to County!
:'''Food Officer:''' What are we going to do? Let them starve?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, even if we ''did'' have the authority...
:'''Manpower Officer:''' We're on our own! You've got the authority, it's about bloody time you did something with it!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Look, what's the point in wasting food on people who are going to die anyway?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I agree with Clive. The food stocks are not going to last long. A lot of people just didn't stock up.
:'''Food Officer:''' How could they? The bloody shops were empty!
:'''Medical Officer:''' And now they're coming out of the shelters. I know it sounds callous, but I think we should hang on to the little food we've got.
:'''Manpower Officer:''' And I need that food to force people to work.
:''[beat]''
:'''Food Officer:''' Can you make us a cup of tea, Sharon?
:'''Manpower Officer:''' Go make it yourself, I'm not your bloody wife.
:'''Food Officer:''' Anybody got a fag?
:'''Medical Officer:''' ''[tosses a pack to the Food Officer]'' Bad for your health, innit.
[[File:Atomic cloud over Nagasaki from Koyagi-jima.jpeg|thumb|A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.]]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Clive Sutton:''' We've no choice, as far as I see.
:'''Food Officer:''' Can't we get ''any'' food from outside?
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Where from? We've told County and everybody's in the same boat. The trouble is, we can't contact Rockley or Airs Brook. God knows what's happened there.
:'''Food Officer:''' Probably been raided.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What do you think, Doctor? 
:'''Medical Officer:''' We'll have to cut their rations. I've worked it out there. ''[produces a file]'' A thousand calories for manual workers and 500 for the rest.
:'''Food Officer:''' 500? ''500?!'' That wouldn't keep a flea alive!
:'''Clive Sutton:''' Should we be bothering to keep anybody alive if they can't work?
:'''Medical Officer:''' A lot of people are gonna die anyway. It's back to survival of the fittest, I suppose.
:'''Clive Sutton:''' What is that in terms of food, then, 500 calories?
:'''Medical Officer:''' I don't know... A few slices of bread... some soup... a lamb chop... a treacle tart... a few pints of beer... ''[beat, then he raises a fist in the air]'' BASTARDS!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[arguing over where to house survivors]''
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Look, you must have an empty factory ''somewhere'' to put them!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, you look! I've got thousands of homeless bloody people up there walking around, and I've got enough on with them without being worried about bloody criminals!
:'''Chief Supt. Hirst:''' Well, you're gonna have to find somewhere to put them, aren't you?!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Well, I don't know! Look, shoot the buggers, I don't care!
:''[Chief Supt. Hirst walks off, but the Information Officer enters to hand the Accommodation Officer a file which he reads]''
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' Aw, Christ, Steve... this should've been sorted out days ago!
:'''Information Officer:''' Well, what about the rest centers, can we not tell them to make their way there?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' No, no, there'll be no point. They'll be overrun anyway.
:'''Information Officer:''' What about tents? Any tents we could use?
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' What-- Tents?! How the hell should I know?! Look, if you want to know about tents, go and phone the bloody Boy Scouts!
:'''Information Officer:''' Oh, piss off, will you?! You're not the only one under pressure!
:'''Accommodation Officer:''' I bloody know! ''[starts coughing]''
:'''Information Officer:''' ''[throws the file over to a desk]'' YOU sort it!

==About ''Threads''==
[[File:Nagasakibomb.jpg|thumb|Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail. —[[Barry Hines]]]]
[[File:Operation Upshot-Knothole - Badger 001.jpg|thumb|The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. —[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]]]
*Our intention in making ''Threads'' was to step aside from the politics and – I hope convincingly – show the actual effects on either side should our best endeavours to prevent nuclear war fail.
**[[Barry Hines]], as quoted in Kibble-White, J., [http://www.offthetelly.co.uk/oldott/www.offthetelly.co.uk/index126a.html?page_id=1835 &quot;Let's All Hide in the Linen Cupboard&quot;], ''Off The Telly'' (September 2001).

===[[Reece Dinsdale]]===
*Nuclear war is everyone’s problem, it’s not just country to country. It’s a worldwide problem, we all share it, and that’s why it’s so frightening now. Since ''Threads'' was made I’m sure there have been advances in what nuclear weapons can do.
*Of course, my character goes missing halfway through the film, so half of the filming I wasn’t privy to. [...] You want to know what happens, but you’re not told. I suppose the message is that’s exactly what it’ll be like — nothing will be tied up nicely because people will disappear.
*Who knows? He died, presumably. I have no more idea than anyone else, but that’s the point. That’s why it’s so clever.
**Answering the question &quot;So what do you think happened to Jimmy?&quot;

===[[Mick Jackson (director)|Mick Jackson]]===
*[[Barry Hines|Barry]] came up with the idea of the two families – one working class, the other lower-middle – and what their lives were like. Sheffield seemed a good place to set it, and Barry knew it well. It was bang in the middle of the country, and a good way from London. Strategically, it also made sense: there were industrial and military targets nearby.&lt;br /&gt;Both of us were interested in the idea that none of these characters would ever have a god’s-eye-view of events, and never find out what was happening outside their immediate experience, certainly not outside Sheffield. That seemed to be the way most people would have to deal with a nuclear apocalypse, with most forms of communication vaporised.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*From the point where the bomb happens, the whole nature of the movie changes. In the first half of the movie, I hope, you have a very full soundtrack. You have all the soundtrack of TV broadcasts and radio broadcasts, the sound of birdsong in the country, the sound of musical things happening, the sound of traffic and city noises. And from the moment that the bomb drops you don't have anything. You don't even have the teletype, all these things, they just type out in silence, and all you hear is wind. [...] You hear voices of people screaming, coughing or whatever. You hear wind, you hear no birds. [...] It's gone. That world is gone.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*In this movie, from the outset, I wanted to put it in the scale of people that you might know, people like yourself, your immediate family, relations and so on, and no bigger than that, and not really to show anything except how it would happen to them. So, there's no God's eye view in this movie. You don't actually get to look down and get the overall picture and see maps of Europe and maps of the world and so on. You just get what's happening to these people, and it's all really done from ground level. There's no cinematic crane shots or anything like that. It's just very, very documentary.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*People tell me how relevant they find the movie to what's happening now. It’s comforting, at a time when so many films are being remade, to find that people still appreciate – and are scared by – the original film.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019)
*The idea was to take a movie which was about death...and use the iconography of life to tell the story.
**From [https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3wkpj/threads-bbc-mick-jackson-director-interview-nuclear-war-trump-north-korea &quot;The Director of the Scariest Movie We've Ever Seen Still Fears Nuclear War the Most&quot;], ''Vice'' (27 February 2018)
*The real effect of a nuclear weapon is not what it does to things, to buildings, to cities: it's what it does to society, what it does to people, what it does psychologically. I was very struck by the work that an American writer called [[w:Robert Jay Lifton|Robert Jay Lifton]] had done on the psychological effects of the [[Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombings of Nagasaki and Hiroshima]] on the survivors and I talked to him a lot. It seemed to me that the story that needed to be told was the story of what this does to society as well as what it does to physical things, and you could only really tell that with a drama, with people that you identified with.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*There's the hospital sequence in ''[[The Day After (1983 film)|The Day After]]'' and there's the hospital sequence in ''Threads''. [...] In ''The Day After'' people are being wheeled in on gurneys and everybody's stressed, but they're coping with it as they would do on ''[[ER]]'' or something like that. In ''Threads'', the floor is covered with muck and shit and blood and people don't have anything they can work with. [...] We see people having their legs amputated without an anesthetic, just something stuck between their teeth for them to bite on. That's what it's going to be like! And I wanted every part of this movie to be &quot;That's what it's going to be like&quot;.
**From DVD audio commentary with Mick Jackson: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*What we’d depicted and its implications stayed in the minds of every actor and crew member for a long time. I’m sure there were some nightmares. There are some things so far outside our experience or comprehension that they are unthinkable. Nuclear war is one.
**From [https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/jan/08/how-we-made-threads &quot;How we made the nuclear apocalypse TV drama Threads&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 January 2019).

===[[Karen Meagher]]===
[[File:Nuclear mushroom cloud of Fat Man.jpg|thumb|I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people. —[[Karen Meagher]]]]
*I think ''Threads'' didn't keep people at arm's length, it drew people in because of the characters that everybody knew. I mean, we related to them, and that's what I think made ''Threads'' so visceral for people.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*I was unaware really of the importance of it at the time, but I was asked to go for an interview, which I did, and I was the first person that Mick Jackson saw for the part. And I went looking rather radical, because I thought &quot;oh, it's about nuclear war&quot;, you know, and I'm a very radical person, so I kind of went wearing my sort of &quot;combat gear&quot; which was very &quot;in&quot; at the time. And it was really strange, because afterwords, when I got the part of Ruth, who turned out to be a very fragile sort of a person, I was surprised and he said having been the first one, he saw me for the part. He obviously saw something in me that was, I don't know, vulnerable, maybe. It was the only time I've ever said to a director &quot;I would really like a part in this, regardless of what that part may be&quot;, because I knew that the content would be close to my heart.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It was cloaked to a great extent in secrecy almost. [...] You knew what it was about, but the script was a close-kept secret I think. Not many people had seen it, and I think they were worried that it would go the same way as ''War Games'', which was made but never seen, so it was all quite mysterious really.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
*It's hard to watch and it should be hard to watch. It should frighten people, and if it's done that, it's done its job.
**From ''Auditioning for the Apocalypse'', DVD special feature: ''Threads: remastered''. Director: Mick Jackson. 1984. 2-disc special edition. Severin Films Inc., 2017.
** The BBC drama-documentary ''[[w:The War Game|The War Game]]'' was intended for broadcast in 1965, but was withdrawn from the television schedules. It was given a limited theatrical release and received the [[w:Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film|Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature Film]] in 1967. The BBC did not screen ''The War Game'' until July 1986. The film ''[[w:WarGames|WarGames]]'', an American science fiction techno-thriller film, was released in 1983.

== Notes ==
&lt;references group=&quot;N&quot;/&gt;

== References ==
&lt;references/&gt;

== External links == 
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0090163|title=Threads}}

[[Category:1984 films]]
[[Category:Television films]]
[[Category:Post-apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Dystopian films]]
[[Category:Cold War films]]
[[Category:Films about nuclear war and weapons]]
[[Category:Films about World War III]]</text>
      <sha1>he4ebry4jmpgj3xv78lixz8el5ocijf</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Brussels</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>186068</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964911</id>
      <parentid>3879943</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:45:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964911</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8648" sha1="nkznc18ivmqzx9gcm80nrboetef2eck" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Brussel_vlag.svg|thumb|I am delighted to be in Brussels, the capital of Europe, so to speak, where much of Europe's destiny is being charted. The cosmopolitan population of Brussels is perhaps a preview of Europe of the future, when integration becomes more pervasive. —[[Mahathir Mohamad]]]]
[[File:00 Bruxelles - Mont des Arts.jpg|thumb| If [[God]] gives me a long life and allows me to carry out my task, then Brussels will become a city of exceptional category. —[[Leopold II of Belgium|Leopold II]]]]
[[File:Palais de Justice from Hilton.jpg|thumb|The Brussels Palace of Justice]]
[[File:Zepper-Brüssel-Belgien-KöniglicherPalast.jpg|thumb|The Royal Palace of Brussels]]
[[File:Brussels Cinquantenaire R03.jpg|thumb|The Brussels Cinquantenaire Arch]]
'''[[w:Brussels|Brussels]]''', officially the '''Brussels-Capital Region''' is a [[w:Regions of Belgium|region of Belgium]] comprising [[w:Brussels#Municipalities|19 municipalities]], including the [[w:City of Brussels|City of Brussels]] which is the current legislative capital of [[Belgium]] and the former capital of the [[Belgian Colonial Empire]]. The Brussels-Capital Region is a part of both the [[w:French Community of Belgium|French Community of Belgium]], and the [[w:Flemish Community|Flemish community]]. Brussels is also the de facto capital of the [[w:European union|European union]] and hosts the headquarters of [[w:nato|NATO (North Atlantic Treaty Organization)]]. The region has a population of 1.2&amp;nbsp;million and a metropolitan area with a population of over 1.8&amp;nbsp;million, the largest in Belgium.

{{geography-stub}}

== Quotes == 
*  I am delighted to be in Brussels, the capital of Europe, so to speak, where much of Europe's destiny is being charted. The cosmopolitan population of Brussels is perhaps a preview of Europe of the future, when integration becomes more pervasive.
** Malaysian Prime Minister [[Mahathir Mohamad]], [https://www.pmo.gov.my/ucapan/?m=p&amp;p=mahathir&amp;id=1338] (22 September 1988)

* If [[God]] gives me a long life and allows me to carry out my task, then Brussels will become a city of exceptional category.
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-2-0 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} 

* I am generous and about to make a multi-million dollar sacrifice to beautify my capital. It will cost me three to four years of wages, but I wish my life here on earth to leave many traces.
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-5 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} Leopold II in 1865 when accending to the throne.

* I will instruct the minister of war to strengthen the Gendarmerie in Brussels, to recognize the addresses and customs of the demagogues and to try to find out what is coming up, I am told that the [[Demonstration|demonstrations]] which are only intended as intimidation and as preparation in an unguarded moment are able to turn into something else, once they have everyone on the street they will attack the government, what measure have you taken to face such a surprise attack? Do the regiments have been ordered to march on their own accord to the Rue de la Loi and the Boulvard, where in the summer it is more difficult to summon soldiers, will they be more satisfied now, working in the open air is now impossible, if I were you I wouldn't hesitate for a minute to summon them, the responsibility is too great, you are not protected from an incident, and you will have to face a formidable riot, all yours leopold. 
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-8-0 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} Leopold II in a letter to his prime minister, warning him for possible insurrections, as the Belgian Socialist Party demands the Universal right to vote for all workers.

*We can say that in terms of town planning - before the letter - he was a precursor. If there is an area where its reputation is guaranteed to survive for a long time to come, this is it. Belgium found itself since the end of his reign at the forefront of architectural movements and we can still see today in the Brussels landscape, and almost everywhere in the country, the mark of the king-builder.
**[https://www.memoiresducongo.be/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Leo2-Vercauteren.pdf Pierre Vercauteren: A king unjustly maligned. (Page 16)] English historian, Barbara Emerson. Op. Cit. p 269.
*The Palace of Justice in Brussels lies like a cyclops above the city, building a court of justice above a city, that is really something special.
**[https://youtu.b/gSE-FRtJwvQ?t=367 Histories - Hitler in Belgium, Part 1- The humiliation.] (2 Part documentary about Hitlers victory tour in Belgium on July 1, 1940.) Hitler was a Big fan of Leopold II's architect Joseph Poelaert, so much so that Hitler will send his own Architect Albert speer who at that moment is in charcge of the embellishment works of Berlin to Brussels later that year to make a study of the Palace of Justice of Brussels.

*If there is some way to hasten the introduction of civilization to the only part of the world where it has not entered and to interest the public in the matter. I would be flattered if Brussels became the headquarters of this humanitarian and scientific movement which, if it succeeded in developing, would mark the end of the century with a good deed.
**[http://www.ethesis.net/polygamie/polygamie_deel_I_hfst_3.htm Inculturation of Christian marriage in the Belgian Congo. 1919-1950. The Policy Making of the Mission Superiors on Polygamy; their directives to the missionaries and influence on the policy of the State. (Betty Eggermont) CHAPTER 3. THE COLONIZING GOVERNMENT.] ''Leopold II To his brother Prince Philippe, Count of Flanders'', ut supra.

* Few areas of the national life of those [[Western Europe|Western European]] countries failed to benefit from the decades of parasitic exploitation of the [[Colony|colonies]]. One [[Nigerian]], after visiting Brussels in 1960, wrote: “I saw for myself the massive [[Palace|palaces]], [[Museum|museums]] and other public buildings paid for by [[Belgian Congo|Congo]] [[w:Ivory|ivory]] and [[w:Rubber|rubber]].” In recent times, African writers and researchers have also been amazed to find the amount of looted [[Africa|African]] [[Treasures|treasure]] stacked away in the {{w|British Museum}}; and there are comparable if somewhat smaller collections of [[w:African_art|African art]] in [[Paris]], [[Berlin]], and [[New York City|New York]]. Those are some of the things which, in addition to [[Money|monetary wealth]], help to define the metropoles as [[Developed country|developed]] and “[[Civilization|civilized]].”
** [[Walter Rodney]], ''How Europe Underdeveloped Africa'' (1972), p. 186

*The key to defusing the Burundian time bomb therefore lies both in Bujumbura and in Kigali. And a little bit in Brussels, where some key figures of the opposition to Petero Nkurunziza and his party have withdrawn. Our country could also play a role in this, by mediating and building bridges. After all, the confidence in 'the Belgians' still remains with many Burundian top figures, despite some harsh words in recent months.
**[https://www.vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/2015/12/19/naar_een_nieuwe_genocideinburundi-peterverlinden-1-2527426/ Towards a new genocide in Burundi? - Peter Verlinden]

*In my hippie days, Brussels to me was a site of magical and mystical activities. I used to go there for [[meditation]] at the [[w:Zen_Buddhism|Zen]] dojo near Halle Gate or the Tibetan centre in the Capouillet Street, to participate in the meetings of the neo-theosophical World Teacher Trust, to read and buy books in the esoteric bookshop Le Lotus in the borough of Elsene (more spiritual than its counterpart downtown, General Occult), or to attend the 1983 New Age fair &quot;The world we choose&quot;. Kind of Kathmandu.
**Dr. Elst, K. [https://koenraadelst.blogspot.com/2009/12/north-atlantic-brussels.html North-Atlantic Brussels] (2009)

== See Also==
*[[Belgium]]
*[[Belgian Colonial Empire]]
*[[European Union]]
*[[Antwerp]]

== External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{commons}}
* [http://brussels.be/|Official Website of The City of Brussels]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20040404112632/http://www.bruxelles.irisnet.be/en/1en_admi/1en_5com/1en_5bru.htm Page related to The City of Brussels in the Brussels-Capital Region official web site]
* [http://www.brussels.be/4664 Webcam Grand-Place Brussels]
* [http://www.ilotsacre.be/site/en/default_en.htm Interactive map of Brussels historical city centre]

{{Authority control}}


[[Category:Brussels| ]]</text>
      <sha1>nkznc18ivmqzx9gcm80nrboetef2eck</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964912</id>
      <parentid>3964911</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:47:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964912</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9051" sha1="ne0hfxyi32qm6ru60vyhvh2x9hw3crh" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Brussel_vlag.svg|thumb|I am delighted to be in Brussels, the capital of Europe, so to speak, where much of Europe's destiny is being charted. The cosmopolitan population of Brussels is perhaps a preview of Europe of the future, when integration becomes more pervasive. —[[Mahathir Mohamad]]]]
[[File:00 Bruxelles - Mont des Arts.jpg|thumb| If [[God]] gives me a long life and allows me to carry out my task, then Brussels will become a city of exceptional category. —[[Leopold II of Belgium|Leopold II]]]]
[[File:Palais de Justice from Hilton.jpg|thumb|Few areas of the national life of those [[Western Europe|Western European]] countries failed to benefit from the decades of parasitic exploitation of the [[Colony|colonies]]. One [[Nigerian]], after visiting Brussels in 1960, wrote: “I saw for myself the massive [[Palace|palaces]], [[Museum|museums]] and other public buildings paid for by [[Belgian Congo|Congo]] [[w:Ivory|ivory]] and [[w:Rubber|rubber]].” —[[Walter Rodney]]]]
[[File:Zepper-Brüssel-Belgien-KöniglicherPalast.jpg|thumb|The Royal Palace of Brussels]]
[[File:Brussels Cinquantenaire R03.jpg|thumb|The Brussels Cinquantenaire Arch]]
'''[[w:Brussels|Brussels]]''', officially the '''Brussels-Capital Region''' is a [[w:Regions of Belgium|region of Belgium]] comprising [[w:Brussels#Municipalities|19 municipalities]], including the [[w:City of Brussels|City of Brussels]] which is the current legislative capital of [[Belgium]] and the former capital of the [[Belgian Colonial Empire]]. The Brussels-Capital Region is a part of both the [[w:French Community of Belgium|French Community of Belgium]], and the [[w:Flemish Community|Flemish community]]. Brussels is also the de facto capital of the [[w:European union|European union]] and hosts the headquarters of [[w:nato|NATO (North Atlantic Treaty Organization)]]. The region has a population of 1.2&amp;nbsp;million and a metropolitan area with a population of over 1.8&amp;nbsp;million, the largest in Belgium.

{{geography-stub}}

== Quotes == 
*  I am delighted to be in Brussels, the capital of Europe, so to speak, where much of Europe's destiny is being charted. The cosmopolitan population of Brussels is perhaps a preview of Europe of the future, when integration becomes more pervasive.
** Malaysian Prime Minister [[Mahathir Mohamad]], [https://www.pmo.gov.my/ucapan/?m=p&amp;p=mahathir&amp;id=1338] (22 September 1988)

* If [[God]] gives me a long life and allows me to carry out my task, then Brussels will become a city of exceptional category.
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-2-0 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} 

* I am generous and about to make a multi-million dollar sacrifice to beautify my capital. It will cost me three to four years of wages, but I wish my life here on earth to leave many traces.
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-5 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} Leopold II in 1865 when accending to the throne.

* I will instruct the minister of war to strengthen the Gendarmerie in Brussels, to recognize the addresses and customs of the demagogues and to try to find out what is coming up, I am told that the [[Demonstration|demonstrations]] which are only intended as intimidation and as preparation in an unguarded moment are able to turn into something else, once they have everyone on the street they will attack the government, what measure have you taken to face such a surprise attack? Do the regiments have been ordered to march on their own accord to the Rue de la Loi and the Boulvard, where in the summer it is more difficult to summon soldiers, will they be more satisfied now, working in the open air is now impossible, if I were you I wouldn't hesitate for a minute to summon them, the responsibility is too great, you are not protected from an incident, and you will have to face a formidable riot, all yours leopold. 
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-8-0 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} Leopold II in a letter to his prime minister, warning him for possible insurrections, as the Belgian Socialist Party demands the Universal right to vote for all workers.

*We can say that in terms of town planning - before the letter - he was a precursor. If there is an area where its reputation is guaranteed to survive for a long time to come, this is it. Belgium found itself since the end of his reign at the forefront of architectural movements and we can still see today in the Brussels landscape, and almost everywhere in the country, the mark of the king-builder.
**[https://www.memoiresducongo.be/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Leo2-Vercauteren.pdf Pierre Vercauteren: A king unjustly maligned. (Page 16)] English historian, Barbara Emerson. Op. Cit. p 269.
*The Palace of Justice in Brussels lies like a cyclops above the city, building a court of justice above a city, that is really something special.
**[https://youtu.b/gSE-FRtJwvQ?t=367 Histories - Hitler in Belgium, Part 1- The humiliation.] (2 Part documentary about Hitlers victory tour in Belgium on July 1, 1940.) Hitler was a Big fan of Leopold II's architect Joseph Poelaert, so much so that Hitler will send his own Architect Albert speer who at that moment is in charcge of the embellishment works of Berlin to Brussels later that year to make a study of the Palace of Justice of Brussels.

*If there is some way to hasten the introduction of civilization to the only part of the world where it has not entered and to interest the public in the matter. I would be flattered if Brussels became the headquarters of this humanitarian and scientific movement which, if it succeeded in developing, would mark the end of the century with a good deed.
**[http://www.ethesis.net/polygamie/polygamie_deel_I_hfst_3.htm Inculturation of Christian marriage in the Belgian Congo. 1919-1950. The Policy Making of the Mission Superiors on Polygamy; their directives to the missionaries and influence on the policy of the State. (Betty Eggermont) CHAPTER 3. THE COLONIZING GOVERNMENT.] ''Leopold II To his brother Prince Philippe, Count of Flanders'', ut supra.

* Few areas of the national life of those [[Western Europe|Western European]] countries failed to benefit from the decades of parasitic exploitation of the [[Colony|colonies]]. One [[Nigerian]], after visiting Brussels in 1960, wrote: “I saw for myself the massive [[Palace|palaces]], [[Museum|museums]] and other public buildings paid for by [[Belgian Congo|Congo]] [[w:Ivory|ivory]] and [[w:Rubber|rubber]].” In recent times, African writers and researchers have also been amazed to find the amount of looted [[Africa|African]] [[Treasures|treasure]] stacked away in the {{w|British Museum}}; and there are comparable if somewhat smaller collections of [[w:African_art|African art]] in [[Paris]], [[Berlin]], and [[New York City|New York]]. Those are some of the things which, in addition to [[Money|monetary wealth]], help to define the metropoles as [[Developed country|developed]] and “[[Civilization|civilized]].”
** [[Walter Rodney]], ''How Europe Underdeveloped Africa'' (1972), p. 186

*The key to defusing the Burundian time bomb therefore lies both in Bujumbura and in Kigali. And a little bit in Brussels, where some key figures of the opposition to Petero Nkurunziza and his party have withdrawn. Our country could also play a role in this, by mediating and building bridges. After all, the confidence in 'the Belgians' still remains with many Burundian top figures, despite some harsh words in recent months.
**[https://www.vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/2015/12/19/naar_een_nieuwe_genocideinburundi-peterverlinden-1-2527426/ Towards a new genocide in Burundi? - Peter Verlinden]

*In my hippie days, Brussels to me was a site of magical and mystical activities. I used to go there for [[meditation]] at the [[w:Zen_Buddhism|Zen]] dojo near Halle Gate or the Tibetan centre in the Capouillet Street, to participate in the meetings of the neo-theosophical World Teacher Trust, to read and buy books in the esoteric bookshop Le Lotus in the borough of Elsene (more spiritual than its counterpart downtown, General Occult), or to attend the 1983 New Age fair &quot;The world we choose&quot;. Kind of Kathmandu.
**Dr. Elst, K. [https://koenraadelst.blogspot.com/2009/12/north-atlantic-brussels.html North-Atlantic Brussels] (2009)

== See Also==
*[[Belgium]]
*[[Belgian Colonial Empire]]
*[[European Union]]
*[[Antwerp]]

== External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{commons}}
* [http://brussels.be/|Official Website of The City of Brussels]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20040404112632/http://www.bruxelles.irisnet.be/en/1en_admi/1en_5com/1en_5bru.htm Page related to The City of Brussels in the Brussels-Capital Region official web site]
* [http://www.brussels.be/4664 Webcam Grand-Place Brussels]
* [http://www.ilotsacre.be/site/en/default_en.htm Interactive map of Brussels historical city centre]

{{Authority control}}


[[Category:Brussels| ]]</text>
      <sha1>ne0hfxyi32qm6ru60vyhvh2x9hw3crh</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964913</id>
      <parentid>3964912</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:49:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964913</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9085" sha1="jh5fa3fc4bqg8vyg5esya0w5nlp3d4b" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Brussel_vlag.svg|thumb|I am delighted to be in Brussels, the capital of Europe, so to speak, where much of Europe's destiny is being charted. The cosmopolitan population of Brussels is perhaps a preview of Europe of the future, when integration becomes more pervasive. —[[Mahathir Mohamad]]]]
[[File:00 Bruxelles - Mont des Arts.jpg|thumb| If [[God]] gives me a long life and allows me to carry out my task, then Brussels will become a city of exceptional category. —[[Leopold II of Belgium|Leopold II]]]]
[[File:Palais de Justice from Hilton.jpg|thumb|Few areas of the national life of those [[Western Europe|Western European]] countries failed to benefit from the decades of parasitic exploitation of the [[Colony|colonies]]. One [[Nigerian]], after visiting Brussels in 1960, wrote: “I saw for myself the massive [[Palace|palaces]], [[Museum|museums]] and other public buildings paid for by [[Belgian Congo|Congo]] [[w:Ivory|ivory]] and [[w:Rubber|rubber]].” —[[Walter Rodney]]]]
[[File:Zepper-Brüssel-Belgien-KöniglicherPalast.jpg|thumb|In my hippie days, Brussels to me was a site of magical and mystical activities. —[[Koenraad Elst]]]]
'''[[w:Brussels|Brussels]]''', officially the '''Brussels-Capital Region''' is a [[w:Regions of Belgium|region of Belgium]] comprising [[w:Brussels#Municipalities|19 municipalities]], including the [[w:City of Brussels|City of Brussels]] which is the current legislative capital of [[Belgium]] and the former capital of the [[Belgian Colonial Empire]]. The Brussels-Capital Region is a part of both the [[w:French Community of Belgium|French Community of Belgium]], and the [[w:Flemish Community|Flemish community]]. Brussels is also the de facto capital of the [[w:European union|European union]] and hosts the headquarters of [[w:nato|NATO (North Atlantic Treaty Organization)]]. The region has a population of 1.2&amp;nbsp;million and a metropolitan area with a population of over 1.8&amp;nbsp;million, the largest in Belgium.

{{geography-stub}}

== Quotes == 
*  I am delighted to be in Brussels, the capital of Europe, so to speak, where much of Europe's destiny is being charted. The cosmopolitan population of Brussels is perhaps a preview of Europe of the future, when integration becomes more pervasive.
** Malaysian Prime Minister [[Mahathir Mohamad]], [https://www.pmo.gov.my/ucapan/?m=p&amp;p=mahathir&amp;id=1338] (22 September 1988)

* If [[God]] gives me a long life and allows me to carry out my task, then Brussels will become a city of exceptional category.
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-2-0 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} 

* I am generous and about to make a multi-million dollar sacrifice to beautify my capital. It will cost me three to four years of wages, but I wish my life here on earth to leave many traces.
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-5 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} Leopold II in 1865 when accending to the throne.

* I will instruct the minister of war to strengthen the Gendarmerie in Brussels, to recognize the addresses and customs of the demagogues and to try to find out what is coming up, I am told that the [[Demonstration|demonstrations]] which are only intended as intimidation and as preparation in an unguarded moment are able to turn into something else, once they have everyone on the street they will attack the government, what measure have you taken to face such a surprise attack? Do the regiments have been ordered to march on their own accord to the Rue de la Loi and the Boulvard, where in the summer it is more difficult to summon soldiers, will they be more satisfied now, working in the open air is now impossible, if I were you I wouldn't hesitate for a minute to summon them, the responsibility is too great, you are not protected from an incident, and you will have to face a formidable riot, all yours leopold. 
** [https://klara.be/leopold-ii-aflevering-8-0 Leopold II, Het hele Verhaal, Johan Op De Beeck Horizon, 2020] {{ISBN|9789463962094}} Leopold II in a letter to his prime minister, warning him for possible insurrections, as the Belgian Socialist Party demands the Universal right to vote for all workers.

*We can say that in terms of town planning - before the letter - he was a precursor. If there is an area where its reputation is guaranteed to survive for a long time to come, this is it. Belgium found itself since the end of his reign at the forefront of architectural movements and we can still see today in the Brussels landscape, and almost everywhere in the country, the mark of the king-builder.
**[https://www.memoiresducongo.be/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Leo2-Vercauteren.pdf Pierre Vercauteren: A king unjustly maligned. (Page 16)] English historian, Barbara Emerson. Op. Cit. p 269.
*The Palace of Justice in Brussels lies like a cyclops above the city, building a court of justice above a city, that is really something special.
**[https://youtu.b/gSE-FRtJwvQ?t=367 Histories - Hitler in Belgium, Part 1- The humiliation.] (2 Part documentary about Hitlers victory tour in Belgium on July 1, 1940.) Hitler was a Big fan of Leopold II's architect Joseph Poelaert, so much so that Hitler will send his own Architect Albert speer who at that moment is in charcge of the embellishment works of Berlin to Brussels later that year to make a study of the Palace of Justice of Brussels.

*If there is some way to hasten the introduction of civilization to the only part of the world where it has not entered and to interest the public in the matter. I would be flattered if Brussels became the headquarters of this humanitarian and scientific movement which, if it succeeded in developing, would mark the end of the century with a good deed.
**[http://www.ethesis.net/polygamie/polygamie_deel_I_hfst_3.htm Inculturation of Christian marriage in the Belgian Congo. 1919-1950. The Policy Making of the Mission Superiors on Polygamy; their directives to the missionaries and influence on the policy of the State. (Betty Eggermont) CHAPTER 3. THE COLONIZING GOVERNMENT.] ''Leopold II To his brother Prince Philippe, Count of Flanders'', ut supra.

* Few areas of the national life of those [[Western Europe|Western European]] countries failed to benefit from the decades of parasitic exploitation of the [[Colony|colonies]]. One [[Nigerian]], after visiting Brussels in 1960, wrote: “I saw for myself the massive [[Palace|palaces]], [[Museum|museums]] and other public buildings paid for by [[Belgian Congo|Congo]] [[w:Ivory|ivory]] and [[w:Rubber|rubber]].” In recent times, African writers and researchers have also been amazed to find the amount of looted [[Africa|African]] [[Treasures|treasure]] stacked away in the {{w|British Museum}}; and there are comparable if somewhat smaller collections of [[w:African_art|African art]] in [[Paris]], [[Berlin]], and [[New York City|New York]]. Those are some of the things which, in addition to [[Money|monetary wealth]], help to define the metropoles as [[Developed country|developed]] and “[[Civilization|civilized]].”
** [[Walter Rodney]], ''How Europe Underdeveloped Africa'' (1972), p. 186

*The key to defusing the [[Burundi|Burundian]] time bomb therefore lies both in [[w:Bujumbura|Bujumbura]] and in [[w:Kigali|Kigali]]. And a little bit in Brussels, where some key figures of the opposition to Petero Nkurunziza and his party have withdrawn. Our country could also play a role in this, by mediating and building bridges. After all, the confidence in 'the Belgians' still remains with many Burundian top figures, despite some harsh words in recent months.
**[https://www.vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/2015/12/19/naar_een_nieuwe_genocideinburundi-peterverlinden-1-2527426/ Towards a new genocide in Burundi? - Peter Verlinden]

*In my hippie days, Brussels to me was a site of magical and mystical activities. I used to go there for [[meditation]] at the [[w:Zen_Buddhism|Zen]] dojo near Halle Gate or the Tibetan centre in the Capouillet Street, to participate in the meetings of the neo-theosophical World Teacher Trust, to read and buy books in the esoteric bookshop Le Lotus in the borough of Elsene (more spiritual than its counterpart downtown, General Occult), or to attend the 1983 New Age fair &quot;The world we choose&quot;. Kind of Kathmandu.
**Dr. Elst, K. [https://koenraadelst.blogspot.com/2009/12/north-atlantic-brussels.html North-Atlantic Brussels] (2009)

== See Also==
*[[Belgium]]
*[[Belgian Colonial Empire]]
*[[European Union]]
*[[Antwerp]]

== External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{commons}}
* [http://brussels.be/|Official Website of The City of Brussels]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20040404112632/http://www.bruxelles.irisnet.be/en/1en_admi/1en_5com/1en_5bru.htm Page related to The City of Brussels in the Brussels-Capital Region official web site]
* [http://www.brussels.be/4664 Webcam Grand-Place Brussels]
* [http://www.ilotsacre.be/site/en/default_en.htm Interactive map of Brussels historical city centre]

{{Authority control}}


[[Category:Brussels| ]]</text>
      <sha1>jh5fa3fc4bqg8vyg5esya0w5nlp3d4b</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Hermann Samuel Reimarus</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>186334</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964997</id>
      <parentid>3924687</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:40:51Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Reimarus: Fragments */</comment>
      <origin>3964997</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="16990" sha1="nax2gg0dugze0v1kotrpc32nk93f0nr" xml:space="preserve">[[Image:Hermann Samuel Reimarus.jpg|thumb|It was then clearly not the intention or the object of Jesus to suffer and to die, but to build up a worldly kingdom, and to deliver the Israelites from bondage.]]
'''[[w:Hermann Samuel Reimarus|Hermann Samuel Reimarus]]''' ([[22 December]] [[1694]], [[w:Hamburg|Hamburg]] – [[1 March]] [[1768]], Hamburg), was a [[Germany|German]] [[philosopher]] and writer of the [[Age of Enlightenment|Enlightenment]] who is remembered for his [[Deism]], the doctrine that human reason can arrive at a knowledge of [[God]] and ethics from a study of nature and our own internal reality, thus eliminating the need for religions based on revelation. He denied the [[supernatural]] origin of [[Christianity]], and is credited by some with initiating historians' investigation of the [[w:historical Jesus|historical Jesus]].

== Quotes ==
* We are justified in drawing an absolute distinction between the teaching of the Apostles in their writings and what Jesus Himself in His own lifetime proclaimed and taught.
** ''Fragments'' 1.3, as quoted (without citation) in [[Albert Schweitzer]], ''[[w:The Quest of the Historical Jesus|The Quest of the Historical Jesus]]'', trans. [[w:William Montgomery (cryptographer)|W. Montgomery]] (1910), p. 16. Cf. Ralph S. Fraser's translation below.

* Each person has his religion and sect impressed upon him as a child, merely as a prejudice, through memorized formulas that are not understood and a drilled-in fear of damnation.
** ''Fragments'' (from [[Gotthold Ephraim Lessing]]'s ''Werke''), as quoted and translated by Christine Lehleiter in ''Fact and Fiction: Literary and Scientific Cultures in Germany and Britain'' (Toronto: University of Toronto Press, 2016), p. 225

=== ''Reimarus: Fragments'' ===
[[File:Reimarus.jpg|thumb|It is foolish to sigh and complain about mankind's disbelief if one cannot furnish men with the persuasive evidence that the matter demands, based on a healthy reason.]]
:&lt;small&gt;''Reimarus: Fragments'', ed. Charles H. Talbert, trans. Ralph S. Fraser (Philadelphia: Fortress Press, 1970)&lt;/small&gt;

* Jesus left us nothing in writing; everything that we know of his teaching and deeds is contained in the writings of his disciples. Especially where his teaching is concerned, not only the evangelists among his disciples, but the apostles as well undertook to present their master's teaching. However, I find great cause to separate completely what the apostles say in their own writings from that which Jesus himself actually said and taught, for the apostles were themselves teachers and consequently present their own views.
** I/3, p. 64

* [Jesus] was born a Jew and intended to remain one.
** I/7, p. 71

* [It is] evident that Jesus in no way intended to abolish this Jewish religion and introduce a new one in its place. From this it follows inevitably that the apostles taught and acted exactly the reverse of what their master had intended, taught, and commanded...
** I/19, p. 101

* The apostles strayed completely from their master in their teaching and in their lives, abandoning his religion and his intention and introducing a completely new system.
** I/19, p. 102

* My goodness! How the simple and ignorant allow themselves to be deceived by their leaders, who are themselves blind guides! And how easily great mysteries, even an entire religion, have been hammered out and for centuries have chained human reason and conscience from a few obscure words that people do not understand and whose genuine antiquity is extremely doubtful!
** I/24, p. 115; quoted in Michael J. Thate's ''Remembrance of Things Past?'' (Tübingen: Mohr Siebeck, 2013), p. 58; on the wording “in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit&quot; ([[w:Matthew 28:19|Matthew 28:19]])

* [Jesus' Jewish contemporaries] are still thinking in terms of a temporal redemption and of an earthly kingdom that they had hoped from Jesus up until that time. Israel or the Jewish people was to be  redeemed, but not the human race... Thus it was not a savior of the human race who would expiate the sins of the whole world through his Passion and death, but one who would redeem the people of Israel from temporal servitude.
** I/30, pp. 127–128, as quoted in [[w:Jon Stewart (philosopher)|Jon Stewart]]'s ''The Unity of Content and Form in Philosophical Writing'' (Bloomsbury Publishing, 2013), p. 69, and ''An Introduction to Hegel's Lectures on the Philosophy of Religion'' (Oxford University Press, 2022), p. 42

* It was entirely possible that Jesus' body was secretly stolen from the tomb at night and that it was buried in another place.
** p. 161; quoted in Man Kei Ho's ''A Critical Study on T. F. Torrance's Theology of Incarnation'' (Frankfurt: Peter. Lang, 2008), p. 101

* It is foolish to sigh and complain about mankind's disbelief if one cannot furnish men with the persuasive evidence that the matter demands, based on a healthy reason.
** I/32, p. 200

=== ''Fragments from Reimarus'' ===
:&lt;small&gt;''Fragments from Reimarus: Consisting of Brief Critical Remarks on the Object of Jesus and His Disciples as Seen in the New Testament'', ed. Charles Voysey, translated from the German of G. E. Lessing (London and Edinburgh: Williams and Norgate, 1879)&lt;/small&gt;

* That which is absurd and impossible, that which in any other history would be called falsehood, deception, outrage and cruelty, cannot be made reasonable, righteous, and true by the added words: &quot;Thus saith the Lord.&quot; 
** p. 7

* [Jesus] ended his life with the words, &quot;''Eli, Eli, lama sabacthani?''&quot; &quot;My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?&quot;—a confession which can hardly be otherwise interpreted than that God had not helped him to carry out his intention and attain his object as he had hoped He would have done. It was then clearly not the intention or the object of Jesus to suffer and to die, but to build up a worldly kingdom, and to deliver the Israelites from bondage. It was in this that God had forsaken him, it was in this that his hopes had been frustrated.
** p. 27

* Thus the existing history of Jesus enlightens us more and more upon the object of his conduct and teaching, which entirely correspond with the first idea entertained of him by his apostles, i.e., that he was a worldly deliverer. It enlightens us also upon the fact that they had good reason to believe in him as such so long as he lived. It also shows that the master, and how much more his disciples found themselves mistaken and deceived by the condemnation and the death, and that the new system of a suffering spiritual Saviour, which no one had ever known or thought of before, was invented after the death of Jesus, and invented only because the first hopes had failed. 
** p. 28

* The essential parts of Christianity are the articles of faith by the denial or ignorance of which we cease to be Christians. The principal of these are: the spiritual deliverance through the suffering and death of Christ; Resurrection from death in confirmation of the sufficient suffering of Christ; and, the return of Christ for reward and punishment, as the fruit and consequence of the deliverance. He who grapples with or disproves these first principles attacks the substance (or essence) of the object. 
** p. 69 

* By unessential things in reference to religion I mean first of all, the miracles, to which nevertheless such particular importance is attached by the Christian religion. No one can affirm that miracles of themselves establish a single article of faith. If we granted that articles of faith carried with them conviction and inherent credibility, how should we dare to require miracles in order to believe them? If we granted that the resurrection had been proved to be true by the most undoubted and unanimous witnesses, as in all fairness it ought to be, we could surely believe it without any assistant miracle. If we granted that Christ really did return in the clouds of Heaven, as according to promise he ought to have done, we should certainly want no miracles to prove it.
** p. 69 

* Jesus himself could not perform miracles where the people had not faith beforehand, and when sensible men, the learned and rulers of those times, demanded of him a miracle which could be submitted to examination, he, instead of granting the request, began to upbraid them; so that no man of this stamp could believe in him. It was not until thirty to sixty years after the death of Jesus, that people began to write an account of the performance of these miracles, in a language which the Jews in Palestine did not understand. And this was at a time when the Jewish nation was in a state of the greatest disquietude and confusion, and when very few of those who had known Jesus were still alive. Nothing then was easier for them than to invent as many miracles as they pleased, without fear of their writings being readily understood or refuted. It had been impressed upon all converts from the beginning that it was both advantageous and soul-saving to believe, and to put the mind captive under the obedience of faith; and consequently there was as much credulity among them as there was &quot;pia fraud&quot; or &quot;deception from good motives&quot; among their teachers; and both of these, as is well known, prevailed in the highest degree in the early Christian church.
** pp. 73–74 

* Other religions, indeed, are quite as full of miracles; the heathen boasts of many, so does the Turk; no religion is without them, and this it is which also makes the Christian miracles so doubtful, and provokes us to ask: &quot;Did the events really happen? Were the attendant circumstances such as are stated? Did they come to pass naturally, or by craft, or by chance?&quot;... those who would build Christianity upon miracles give it nothing firm, deep or substantial for a foundation. 
** p. 74 

[[File:H S Reimarus.jpg|thumb|It is always a sign that a doctrine or history possesses no depth of authenticity when one is obliged to resort to miracles in order to prove its truth.]]
* It is always a sign that a doctrine or history possesses no depth of authenticity when one is obliged to resort to miracles in order to prove its truth.  Miracles do not possess in or by themselves any principle containing a single article of faith or conclusive fact. It follows not because a prophet has performed miracles that therefore he has spoken the truth, because false prophets and magicians also performed signs and wonders, and false Christs performed miracles by which even the elect might be deceived. It follows not because Jesus restored sight to a blind man and healed a lame one, ergo God is threefold in person, ergo Jesus is a real God and man. It follows not because Jesus awakened Lazarus from death that therefore he also must have arisen from death. 
** p. 75

* The unerring signs of truth and falsehood are clear, distinct consistency and contradiction. This is also the case with revelation, in so far as that it must, in common with other truths, be free from contradiction. And just as little as miracles can prove that twice two are five or that a triangle has four angles, can a contradiction lying in the history and dogmas of Christianity be removed by any number of miracles. 
** p. 75

* If a prophecy  is to be called infallible, I fairly demand that it should state beforehand legibly, clearly, and distinctly that which no man could previously have known, and that the same should thereafter take place at the time appointed, but that it should not take place because it has been predicted. If, however, such a prophecy can only be verified through allegorical interpretations of words and interpretation of words and things; if it be only composed of dark and dubious words, and the expressions it contains are commonplace, vague, and uncertain; if the matter was thought probable, or was foreseen by human cunning; if it occurs because it was predicted; if the words used refer to some other matter and are only applied to the prophecy by a quibble; if it is only written down after the event has occurred; if a prophetic book or passage is given out to be older than it is; or lastly, if the thing predicted does not take place at all, then the prophecy is either doubtful or false. 
** pp. 76–77 

* In short, I may affirm that one cannot refer to a single quoted prophecy that is not false; or if you would have me speak more mildly, I will only say that they are all ambiguous and doubtful, and are not to be accepted from writers who trifle with things and words.
** p. 78

== Quotes about Reimarus ==
[[File:Émile Schneider, Portrait d'Albert Schweitzer.jpg|thumb|He had no predecessors; neither had he any disciples. His work is one of those supremely great works which pass and leave no trace, because they are before their time.&lt;br/&gt;—[[Albert Schweitzer]]]]

* H. S. Reimarus, whose work was published posthumously in 1778, was the first to develop a picture of Jesus distinct from the Christ described in the Gospels.
** [[w:Raymond E. Brown|Raymond E. Brown]], ''An Introduction to the New Testament'' (1997), p. 299

* Before Reimarus, no one had attempted to form a historical conception of the life of Jesus.
** [[Albert Schweitzer]], ''The Quest of the Historical Jesus'' (1910), p. 13

* To say that the fragment on &quot;The Aims of Jesus and His Disciples&quot; is a magnificent piece of work is barely to do it justice. This essay is not only one of the greatest events in the history of criticism, it is also a masterpiece of general literature. The language is as a rule crisp and terse, pointed and epigrammatic—the language of a man who is not &quot;engaged in literary composition&quot; but is wholly concerned with the facts. At times, however, it rises to heights of passionate feeling, and then it is as though the fires of a volcano were painting lurid pictures upon dark clouds. Seldom has there been a hate so eloquent, so lofty a scorn; but then it is seldom that a work has been written in the just consciousness of so absolute a superiority to contemporary opinion. And withal, there is dignity and serious purpose; Reimarus' work is no pamphlet.
** [[Albert Schweitzer]], ''The Quest of the Historical Jesus'' (1910), p. 15

[[File:PPN663947642 Hermannus Samuel Reimarus (1751).jpg|thumb|His work is perhaps the most splendid achievement in the whole course of the historical investigation of the life of Jesus.&lt;br/&gt;—[[Albert Schweitzer]]]]
* His work is perhaps the most splendid achievement in the whole course of the historical investigation of the life of Jesus, for he was the first to grasp the fact that the world of thought in which Jesus moved was essentially eschatological.
** [[Albert Schweitzer]], ''The Quest of the Historical Jesus'' (1910), p. 23

* He had no predecessors; neither had he any disciples. His work is one of those supremely great works which pass and leave no trace, because they are before their time...
** [[Albert Schweitzer]], ''The Quest of the Historical Jesus'' (1910), p. 26

* The first thing that struck him, and the first conclusion he came to, was that the Bible is not a book of religious instruction or a catechism.
** [[w:David Strauss|David Strauss]], ''Life of Reimarus'' (1862), p. 264

* Reimarus had too much sense of truth to endeavour to explain away by artificial demonstration the punishment of eternal Hell fire. If salvation was alone to be found in the name of Jesus, if all who did not believe in him were to be everlastingly damned, and as this creed must have been handed down from the sayings of Jesus himself, it followed that ninety-nine hundredths of the human race, those who either had never heard of Christ or of salvation to be obtained through him, or those who had not been able to convince themselves of it, were unmercifully sentenced, after this short life, to everlasting torment; and this not for the sake of making them better, but to punish them, and to satisfy God's unquenchable wrath, for a sin committed in the beginning of Creation, and a sin of which they themselves were guiltless. This seemed to banish all Divine perfection, all that was lovable and noble in God, and transformed Him into the likeness of a Satanic and hideous demon.
** [[w:David Strauss|David Strauss]], ''Life of Reimarus'' (1862), p. 260

* The idea of God, as the most perfect of beings, existed full and warm in the heart of Reimarus, as we see by the following words:—&quot;Far be it from Thee, great Judge of the World, most lovable, most kind, most charitable, most merciful God, to pronounce so unjust a sentence upon the poor creatures Thou hast created!&quot;
** [[w:David Strauss|David Strauss]], ''Life of Reimarus'' (1862), p. 262

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Commons}}
* [https://archive.org/details/fragmentsfromrei00reim ''Fragments from Reimarus''] English 1879

{{DEFAULTSORT:Reimarus, Hermann Samuel}}
[[Category:1694 births]]
[[Category:1768 deaths]]
[[Category:Deists]]
[[Category:Philosophers from Germany]]
[[Category:People from Hamburg]]</text>
      <sha1>nax2gg0dugze0v1kotrpc32nk93f0nr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Christine (1983 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>186905</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965213</id>
      <parentid>3858117</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:28:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39974-73</username>
        <id>3350201</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Taglines */</comment>
      <origin>3965213</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="14708" sha1="h0ovsuo92z27ln24pa8g30sm1afaoxo" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Christine.jpg|thumb|Her name is Christine. My brother bought her back in September '57. That's when you got your new model year, in September. Brand-new, she was. She had the smell of a brand-new car. That's just about the finest smell in the world.]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Christine (1983 film)|Christine]]''''' is a [[w:1983 in film|1983 film]] about a nerdish boy who buys [[w:Plymouth Fury|a classic red and white 1958 Plymouth Fury]] named Christine (license plate &quot;CQB 241&quot;) which seems to have a mind of its own.
:''Directed by [[John Carpenter]]. Written by Bill Phillips, based on [[w:Christine (novel)|the novel]] by [[Stephen King]].'' 
{{center|'''She's Hell on Wheels.'''&amp;nbsp; &lt;small&gt;([[#Taglines|taglines]])&lt;/small&gt;}}

[[File:Man in front of headlight (Unsplash).jpg|thumb|Hey, Cunningham! Is that you, Cunningham? Hey! You ain't mad, are you?]]
[[File:1958 Fury (4260985509).jpg|thumb|&quot;What if you fix her up, and he just comes back and does it again?&quot;&lt;br&gt;&quot;He won't do it again.&quot;]]
[[File:Plymouth Fury 1958 Christine HeadOn CECF 9April2011 (14598905674).jpg|thumb|OK. Show me.]]

== Arnie Cunningham ==
* Whoa, whoa. You better watch what you say about my car. She's really sensitive.
* Has it ever occurred to you that part of being a parent is trying to kill your kids?
* OK. Show me.

== Dennis Guilder ==
* Christine is gonna come through the door. You better get in the office and stay out of sight, OK? Once she gets inside, hit the button and bring the door down. Then we'll have her trapped.

== Moochie Welch ==
* Hey, Cunningham! Is that you, Cunningham? Hey! You ain't mad, are you?

== Dialogue ==
:'''Mr. Casey''': ''[after being told that Buddy Repperton has a switchblade by Arnie]'' Empty your pockets, Buddy.
:'''Buddy''': The fuck I will. You can't make me.
:'''Mr. Casey''': If you mean I don't have the authority, you're wrong. If you mean I can't turn out your pockets myself-
:'''Buddy''': Yeah, try it, you little bald fuck, and I'll knock you through the fucking wall! Fuck!
:''[Casey turns to Buddy's friends]''
:'''Mr. Casey''': You two boys go up to the office.
:''[The other two, except Moochie, go to the office]''
:'''Mr. Casey''': Stay there. Don't go anywhere else. You got enough trouble without that. ''[turns back to Buddy]'' Now... if you don't empty your pockets right now, I'm gonna call the cops.
:''[Buddy reaches into his pocket, pulls out a switchblade and drops it on the floor. The switchblade opens up as it hits the concrete floor]''
:'''Mr. Casey''': Go to the office, Buddy.
:''[Buddy obeys him]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dennis''': I bet this thing won't even start.
:'''George LeBay''': She'll start.
:''[He holds up some keys]''
:'''LeBay''': You'll need these.
:''[Arnie and Dennis look out the open passenger door, at the old man standing near the car]''
:'''Arnie''': How much do you want for her? Whatever it is, it's not enough.
:'''Dennis''': Jeez, Arnie.
:'''LeBay''': Sonny, you ever owned a car before?
:'''Dennis''': Yeah, he owns a Mustang-
:'''Arnie''': No. Just got my license.
:'''LeBay''': Name's George LeBay. What's yours?
:'''Arnie''': Arnie Cunningham. What are you asking?
:''[LeBay gives Arnie the keys]''
:'''LeBay''': Start her up.
:'''Arnie''': Really?
:''[As LeBay nods, Arnie sits behind the wheel. The car starts on his first try]''
:'''Arnie''': Does the car have a name?
:'''LeBay''': Her name is Christine.
:'''Arnie''': Huh. I like that. It suits her.
:'''Dennis''': Come on, Arnie, we gotta get goin', huh?
:'''LeBay''': My brother bought her back in September '57. That's when you got your new model year, in September. Brand-new, she was. She had the smell of a brand-new car.  That's just about the finest smell in the world, 'cept maybe for pussy. When he got her, she had 6 miles on the odometer. Damn roller when through hell and back with Christine.
:'''Dennis''': If your brother likes this car so much, why is he selling it?
:'''LeBay''': Cause he's stone-cold dead, that's why. Died six weeks ago.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Arnie''': I got the car and that's it!
:'''Mrs. Cunningham''': That most certainly is not ''it''! ''[to Dennis]'' How could ''you'' have let him do this?!
:'''Dennis''': I didn't let him. I mean he wanted the car and he bought it. I tried to talk him out of it, in fact.
:'''Mrs. Cunningham''': ''[coldly]'' Mm, I doubt that you tried very hard.
:'''Dennis''': Yeah, well I'm going home.
:'''Mrs. Cunningham''': I think you should.
:''[Fed up, Arnie gets up and starts to leave the room]''
:'''Arnie''': OK that's it, I'm getting the fuck out of here.
:'''Mr. Cunningham''': Oh, Arnie, now what kind of language is that?
:'''Mrs. Cunningham''': ''[sharply]'' ''What'' did you say?! What did you say?
:'''Arnie''': Look, you wanted me in college courses, I'm there. You wanted me in the chess club instead of the band, OK, I'm there too. Now I managed to get through seventeen years without embarrassing your bridge club or landing jail! Now I'm telling you, I'm gonna have this, this ''one'' thing!
:'''Mrs. Cunningham''': You are not keeping any car at this house!
:'''Arnie''': Fine!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Arnie and Dennis show up at Darnell's junkyard garage; Christine's badly-rusted exhaust is sending fumes everywhere]''
:'''Darnell''': Stall 20! Stall 20! Get it over there and shut it off, before we all choke to death! ''[to Dennis]'' Kiddo, you sold him that piece of shit? You oughta be fuckin' ashamed of yourself.
:'''Dennis''': I didn't sell it to him. I tried to talk him out of it.
:'''Darnell''': You shoulda' tried harder. I knew a guy had a car like that once. Stupid bastard killed himself in it. Son of a bitch was so mean, you could've poured boiling water down his throat and he would've pissed ice cubes! ''[to Arnie]'' Okay. That's the last time you run that mechanical asshole in here without an exhaust hose... I catch you doing it one time, and you're out, you understand? HUH?
:'''Arnie''': Yes, sir.
:'''Darnell''': And I'm gonna tell you somethin' else right now. I don't take any shit from you kids. This place is for working stiffs gotta keep their cars running so they can keep bread on the table, it's not for rich-assed, snot-nose kids who wanna go dragging around on the Orange Belt. I don't allow no smoking in here, neither! You wanna' butt, you go out in the junkyard!
:'''Arnie''': Oh, well I don't sm-
:'''Darnell''': ''[interrupting]'' Don't interrupt me, punk! Don't interrupt me, don't get smart.
:'''Dennis''': Uh, sir?
:'''Darnell''': What?
:'''Dennis''': ''[points at Darnell's own men who are smoking at a card table]'' Those men over there smoking. You better tell then to stop.
:'''Darnell''': You trying to help your buddy right out of here, jerk?
:'''Dennis''': Nah.
:'''Darnell''': Then shut your pie-hole. I know a creep when I see one. ''[turns back to Arnie]'' I think I'm looking at one right now. You're on probation... you get it? You screw around with me once, I don't care how much money you paid up in front, I'll throw you out on your ass! Now you got it? ''Huh?!''
:''[Dennis flips off Darnell while standing behind him]''
:'''Arnie''': Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
:'''Darnell''': Good. Now, get the hell outta here. We're closed.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Dennis comes back to LeBay's house while the man is working in the yard. He looks up and glares at Dennis]''
:'''LeBay''': What the hell do you want?
:'''Dennis''': I know about your brother. I know he died choking on exhaust fumes.
:'''LeBay''': You don't know ''shit'', kid. My brother died because he wanted to. He ran a rubber hose from the exhaust pipe.
:'''Dennis''': Arnie would have never bought that car if he'd known somebody died in it.
:'''LeBay''': Either you're dumber than you look, or you don't know your friend very well. He had the same look in his eye that my brother always had. Probably the only thing my brother ever loved in his whole rotten life was that car. No shitter ever came between him and Christine, if they did... watch out! He had a five-year-old daughter choke to death in her... he wouldn't get rid of her. He just rode around with the radio blaring, not a care in the world except for Christine. Only time I ever interfered with it was when Rita killed herself.
:'''Dennis''': Who's Rita?
:'''LeBay''': His wife! He didn't care a rat's ass about her! She died the same way he did... then I made him get rid of it... for decency, ya know? Of course, the car came back three weeks later.
:'''Dennis''': What do you mean &quot;came back&quot;?
:''[LeBay just gives him a look as if to say, &quot;You know what I mean.&quot;]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Dennis's football injury puts him in the hospital, Arnie comes by on Thanksgiving. They discuss Buddy Repperton and the damage he and some friends of his did to Christine]''
:'''Dennis''': What if you fix her up, and he just comes back and does it again?
:'''Arnie''': He won't do it again.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Arnie''': A toast. Death to the shitters of the world, in 1979.
:'''Dennis''': Oh, come on, Arnie. You know I can't drink to that.
:'''Arnie''': Well, what can you drink to?
:'''Dennis''': What about to us? You know, to friendship?
:'''Arnie''': Friendship. That's really good.
:''[They drink the toast. Arnie carelessly finishes his beer and tosses it out the window]''
:'''Arnie''': Hey, Dennis. Look.
:''[He lets go of the wheel]''
:'''Arnie''': Ta-daa!
:'''Dennis''': Come on!
:''[Dennis tries to grab the wheel, but Arnie stops him]''
:'''Arnie''': I want you to see this. I want you to see this! This is great alignment; you just don't see this anymore! Don't be scared.
:'''Dennis''': I'm scared for you, man, for what's happened to you, this fuckin' car!
:'''Arnie''': I know you're jealous. But you'll be fine as long as you stick with me. And you know what happens to shitters who don't.
:'''Dennis''': No. What does happen?
:'''Arnie''': Well, let's not kid each other, Dennis.
:'''Dennis''': Who are the shitters?
:'''Arnie''': All of 'em.
:'''Dennis''': Arnie. Leigh's on your side. She cares a lot about you. She does.
:''[Arnie snickers then laughs]''
:'''Arnie''': Heey! Don't you like this beer? I thought you liked beer.
:'''Dennis''': Did you hear what I just said?!
:'''Arnie''': Let me tell you a little something about love, Dennis. It has a voracious appetite. It eats everything. Friendship. Family. It kills me how much it eats. But I'll tell you something else. You feed it right, and it can be a beautiful thing, and that's what we have. You know, when someone believes in you, man, you can do anything, any fucking thing in the entire universe! And when you believe right back in that someone, then ''watch out, world'', because nobody can stop you then, nobody! Ever!
:'''Dennis''': You feel this way about Leigh?
:'''Arnie''': What? Fuck ''no'', I'm talkin' about ''Christine'', man! No shitter ever came between me and Christine! Now, you ''watch'' this.
:''[As Arnie puts his foot down, Dennis hangs on for dear life. Christine passes 100 miles per hour as Arnie steers into the oncoming lane. A car just manages to steer out of her way]''
:'''Arnie''': CHICKENSHITS! Oh man, there is ''nothing'' finer than being behind the wheel of your own car, 'cept maybe for a pussy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Christine's body is crushed into a block]''
:'''Detective Junkins''': I wouldn't feel so bad if I were you. You two are heroes, y'know.
:'''Dennis''': Yeah. A real hero could've saved Arnie.
:'''Leigh''': We didn't do so hot.
:'''Detective Junkins''': Hey, some things can't be helped. Some people, too.
:'''Dennis''': Yeah.
:''[They hear music playing, but it is just a passing man with a boombox]''
:'''Leigh''': God, I hate rock and roll.
:''[As the camera zooms on the block of Christine's body, her front grill twitches slightly as if she's looking at the viewers and saying, &quot;I'll be back.&quot;]''

== Taglines ==
* He was lost until he found her. She took him further than he ever thought he'd go. For her, he was willing to die. For him, she was willing to kill.
* Once she lures you behind her wheel, you'll be hers. Body and soul.
* She's Hell on wheels. 
* Body by Plymouth. Soul by Satan. 
* Watch out for her. This Christmas.
* Seductive. Passionate. Possessive. Pure… evil. She's Christine.
* Hell hath no Fury... like a 1958 Plymouth.
* She lives. She loves. She's a beauty. She's a beast. She's a killer. She's a '58 Plymouth Fury. She's Christine.
* Stephen King. John Carpenter. Two great masters of terror have teamed up to take you for a ride.
* How do you kill something that can't possibly be alive?

== Cast ==
* Robert Nichols II &lt;small&gt;(sound effects)&lt;/small&gt; — Christine
* [[w:Keith Gordon|Keith Gordon]] — Arnie
* [[w:John Stockwell (actor)|John Stockwell]] — Dennis
* [[Harry Dean Stanton]] — Detective Junkins
* [[w:Alexandra Paul|Alexandra Paul]] — Leigh
* [[w:Robert Prosky|Robert Prosky]] — Will
* [[w:Christine Belford|Christine Belford]] — Mrs. Cunningham
* [[w:Roberts Blossom|Roberts Blossom]] — LeBay
* [[w:Kelly Preston|Kelly Preston]] — Roseanne
* William Ostrander — Buddy
* [[w:Malcolm Danare|Malcolm Danare]] — Moochie
* Steven Tash — Richie
* [[w:Stuart Charno|Stuart Charno]] — Don
* Robert Darnell — Mr. Cunningham
* [[w:David Spielberg|David Spielberg]] — Mr. Casey

== Teaser Trailer ==
:''[The teaser trailer begins with the Columbia Pictures logo. Then, the camera each pans over to parts of a car in the dark]''
:'''Narrator''': She's seductive. She's passionate. She's possessive. She's pure… evil. She's Christine, a 1958 Plymouth Fury… possessed by Hell. Her previous owner isn't alive to warn her present one. Once she lures you behind the wheel, you'll be hers. Body and soul. There's no place you can hide, no place you can run, and nothing you can do can stop her. Because how do you kill something that can't possibly be alive?
:''[As the camera finally pans to Christine actually in a garage, her headlights turn on like eyes and she charges forward towards us]''
:'''Narrator''': ''Christine''. Body by Plymouth. Soul by Satan. Watch out for her. This Christmas.

== External Links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0085333|title=Christine}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=christine|title=Christine}}
* {{amg movie|id=9504|title=Christine}}
* {{Mojo title|id=christine|title=Christine}}

{{Media based on Stephen King works}}

[[Category:1983 films]]
[[Category:1980s American films]]
[[Category:Films based on novels]]
[[Category:Supernatural horror films]]
[[Category:Teen films]]
[[Category:Films based on works by Stephen King]]
[[Category:Films about automobiles]]
[[Category:Films directed by John Carpenter]]
[[Category:Films set in California]]</text>
      <sha1>h0ovsuo92z27ln24pa8g30sm1afaoxo</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Regular Show (season 1)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>187345</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965041</id>
      <parentid>3961458</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:03:00Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>KalloFox34</username>
        <id>3350098</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <origin>3965041</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="36082" sha1="3q9vlgr3t7zw48bnwv8akc5o3urmw91" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:''' [[Regular Show (season 1)|1]] [[Regular Show (season 2)|2]] [[Regular Show (season 3)|3]] [[Regular Show (season 4)|4]] [[Regular Show (season 5)|5]] [[Regular Show (season 6)|6]] [[Regular Show (season 7)|7]] [[Regular Show (season 8)|8]] | [[Regular Show: The Movie|Film]] | [[Regular Show: The Lost Tapes|The Lost Tapes]] | [[Regular Show|Main]]
----

The following is a list of quotes from the first season of ''[[Regular Show]]''.

===''The Power'' [1.1a]===
:''[First lines of the series]''
:'''Rigby''': Alright, Beef Burrito. I'm gonna give you one more chance to take back what you said about my mom! ''[A Beef Burrito doll lies silently on the floor]'' '''I'LL ''KILL'' YOU!!!'''
:''[He pats his elbow and jumps onto a trampoline, body-slamming the doll. He then elbows the doll multiple times, and body slams it once more. He picks up the doll and moves its arm, making it punch himself in the face. Behind him, Mordecai is calling to him]''
:'''Mordecai''': Tag up! Tag up!
:''[Pretending to be weakened, Rigby walks over to Mordecai and high-fives him. As Rigby drinks a soda, Mordecai pulls the Beef Burrito doll away. Rigby slams the soda can onto the ground and lets out a ferocious cry. Mordecai sets the doll up next to a bed before walking away onto the shelves]''
:'''Rigby''': What?! ''[silence]'' Oh, you want us to put the hurt on you? ''[Mordecai grabs Rigby]'' I think he wants me to put the hurt on him!
:'''Mordecai''': I think he wants you to put the hurt on him!
:'''Rigby''': You think he wants me to put the hurt on him?!
:'''Mordecai''': Yes, I do!
:''[Mordecai &amp; Rigby scream. Mordecai throws Rigby down onto the trampoline, launching him into the wall. The impact leaves a large hole in the wall and Rigby ends up in a trash can]''
:'''Rigby''': Uhhh..... ''[Stands up]'' Uuuuhhhhyyyy.... ''[Removes trash can]'' Yea-uh!! Did you see how awesome it was when I hit the trampoline?
:'''Mordecai''': Hahahaha! Yeah, I did! But it wasn't as awesome as when you punched that hole in the wall!
:''[They both begin laughing]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': I can't believe I listened to you! I knew we should've gone out to do some work, but no — let's wrestle this stupid doll, it'll be fun.
:'''Rigby''': But it was fun.
:'''Mordecai''': Well, yeah, but... now there's a big hole in the wall! Dude, we're 23 years old! We shouldn't be bustin' holes in walls! We're gonna get ''FIRED'' for this!
:'''Rigby''': You mean ''you're'' gonna get fired for this.
:'''Mordecai''': What?!
:'''Rigby''': You're the one who threw me too hard, ya hole!
:'''Mordecai''': Don't call me a hole! You're the hole! You're the one who wanted to wrestle! 
:'''Rigby''': Okay, okay! Let's not blame anyone. Now, how in the &quot;h&quot; are we gonna fix this &quot;s&quot;?
:'''Mordecai''': I dunno, man. Ugh, we can't fix it and we definitely can't pay for it, cos we don't have any money. Unless you had some money.
:'''Rigby''': No. Besides, I don't even know how much it cost to fix a hole like this. Probably a ton.
:'''Mordecai''': Exactly. Which leaves us with only one possible solution. We convince Benson to give us raises so we can afford to pay someone else to fix it.
:'''Rigby''': Dude. ''[beat]'' ..You are a ''genius''! Of course, raises!
:'''Mordecai''': Okay, dude, here's—
:'''Rigby''': Let me stop you there because I already know what you're going to say — hamboning.
:'''Mordecai''': What?
:'''Rigby''': Yeah, dude! Hamboning! We just go up to Benson and we'll be all like, &quot;We both want raises.&quot; ''[starts hamboning, but Mordecai pushes him away]''
:'''Mordecai''': No, man, stop it. We just need to ask him for a raise and just explain all the—
:'''Rigby''': No, no, no! That's not gonna work! What're ya, 65?! &quot;Excuse me, sir, can I have a raise?&quot; 'C'mon'! I'm tellin' ya, dude! ''Hamboning~''!
:'''Mordecai''': No...
:'''Rigby''': Hamboning will save your life someday! You'll be all like, &quot;What? You tryin' to mug me?&quot; ''[starts hamboning again and mordecai shoves him away]''
:'''Mordecai''': No!! We're not doing that! Ok? &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''OK?'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Rigby''': Fine... '''(Gasp)''' I know what to do!
:'''[Rigby goes through pieces of clothing to find a keyboard]'''
:'''Rigby''': Hehe, are you for raises? Bop-weep-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-booooooo!
:'''Mordecai''': Woah! How did you get that?
:'''Rigby''': I have my methods.
:''[Flashback: The wizard runs and puts his keyboard on the park bench and goes behind the bushes to take a whiz while Rigby takes the keyboard without the wizard looking]''
:''[End of Flashback. Rigby chuckles, remembering]''
:'''Mordecai''': I don't know man, how is that gonna give us raises?
:'''Rigby''': Dude, c'mon man, look. Just come and check it out.
:''[Rigby presses a few keys and music plays]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': (gasp) Where'd he go?
:'''Rigby''': Uhh...
:'''Mordecai''': Did you just send Skips to the moon?!
:'''Rigby''': Isn't that what you said?
:'''Mordecai''': No, room! I sent him to his room, not the moon you idiot! Dude, wish him back.
:'''Rigby''': But, it doesn't work that way.
:'''Mordecai''': What do you mean?!
:'''Rigby''': I can't see him, can't I?!
:'''Mordecai''': Then we have to go get him.
:'''Rigby''': But he's gonna be pissed!
:'''Mordecai''': Better than him being dead!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Benson''': What is all this junk?
:'''Rigby''': Don't get mad at me guys, but I kind of sent a bunch of stuff to the moon while you guys were in the house.
:(Flashback)
:'''Rigby''': A bunch of baby ducks, send 'em to the moon. Soda machine that doesn't work, send it to the moon.
:(End of flashback)
:'''Mordecai''': You drillbit! What else did you send?!
:(monster growling)
:'''Pops''': Look there's Skips! There he is!
:'''Mordecai''': Oh great, it had to be a monster.
:'''Benson''': What is that?!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Rigby''': Ha-ha-ha! We did it! Yeah! Hey, that's mine!
:'''Benson''': Nope. You sent him to the moon, so the least you can do is give him your keyboard. Right, Skips?
:'''Skips''': Right. (Smashes the piano.)
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': Aww!
:'''Benson''': And let's have it.
:'''Rigby''': What?
:'''Benson''': ''(Turning red) '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; THE $40 YOU TWO CONNED OUT OF ME WITH THAT STUPID KEYBOARD CRAP! I know you still got it. Now give it back.&lt;/span&gt;''' (Rigby sighs then they give Benson the $20) '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:maroon&quot;&gt; &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;NOW CLEAN UP THIS MESS OR YOU'RE FIRED!&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/span&gt;''' Ugh, can you believe this?
:'''Skips''': No. (Door Shuts)

===''Just Set Up the Chairs'' [1.1b]===
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, how came we're always stuck with the lame jobs? Settin' up the chairs??
:'''Rigby''': ''LAAAAA~ME!!!''
:'''Benson''': I can't trust you guys with something actually important. You're always slacking off!
:'''Mordecai''': You callin' us slackers?
:'''Rigby''': Did he!? Did you!?
:'''Mordecai''': He's callin' us slackers. Look dude, we can totally set up all those chairs without slacking off.
:'''Benson''': Good. Do it then.
:'''Mordecai''': We will.
:'''Rigby''': Yeah. And then next time you'll get someone ELSE.. to set up the chairs?
:''[Benson looks at Mordecai, who shrugs]''
:'''Benson''': Fine.
:'''Mordecai &amp; Rigby''': OOOOHHHHH!!!! Not settin' up the chairs next time! Not settin' up the chairs next time! UUHH!
:'''Benson''': ...Just set up the chairs...

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Benson''': '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; YOU!&lt;/span&gt;'''
:'''Mordecai''': Woah! Hey Benson. Before you freak out, we totally set up those chairs.
:''[pan left to see cheering kids, Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost seated in a moat of fire]''
:'''Muscle Man''': '''''WOOO!!!''''' This birthday party's hot!
:'''Rigby''': So we're cool, right?
:'''Benson''': '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; YOU IDIOTS!! That's the last time I entrust you with something important, LIKE THE CHAIRS!!!&lt;/span&gt;'''
:''[beat.]''
:'''Mordecai &amp; Rigby''': OOOOHHHHH!!!! Not settin' up the chairs next time! Not settin' up the chairs next time!
:'''Benson''': '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; But you ARE going to clean up this mess, and you can start by sweeping up the special entertainment.&lt;/span&gt;'''
:'''Mordecai''': Yeah, no problem!
:'''Rigby''': We got it.
:'''Mordecai''': Don't worry about us!
:'''Rigby''': ...We're gonna take a break first, right?
:'''Mordecai''': Yeah.

===''Caffeinated Concert Tickets'' [1.2a]===
:'''Benson''': You morons get back here and help me pick up my gumballs!

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Translator''': Uh, Mordecai and Rigby. Uh, funny seeing you here...
:'''Mordecai''': A chainsaw, are you serious?! I mean, '''WHAT'S UP WITH THE CHAINSAW?!'''
:'''Giant Coffee Bean''': Coffee! ''Coffee coffee!''
:'''Translator''': Why didn't you buy us tickets?
:'''Mordecai''': What are you talking about? We never said we'd buy you tickets!
:'''Translator''': But we had a contract!
:'''Rigby''': '''&lt;big&gt;''SHUT IT!!!''&lt;/big&gt;''' (Snatches the tickets)
:'''Mordecai''': You know, at first I thought you were cool, but now I know that you're both total losers.
:'''Rigby''': Everybody hates you!
:'''Mordecai''': Oh, and I just realized something...
:'''Translator''': What?
:'''Mordecai''': Your coffee sucks.
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''&lt;big&gt;OOOOHHHHHHH!!!!&lt;/big&gt;'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;

===''Death Punchies'' [1.2b]===
:
:'''Mordecai''': Aw, man. Dude, let's play it
:'''Rigby''': Whoa whoa whoa! You can't play a game like this out of the box. We gotta stretch it out first. We don't wanna pull our ''hammies'', you know what I'm ''saying?'' '''''(BEEP!)''''' Hey! What are you doing?
:'''Mordecai''': Starting. Hurry up and pick your character. '''''(chuckles)'''''
:'''Rigby''': Aw, what?! I wanted to be player 1!
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, I'M player 1. YOU'RE player 2.
:'''Rigby''': I don't wanna be player 2! He just digs with the sucky pickaxe. I want the one with the shovel.
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, they're exactly the same!
:'''Rigby''': Then why don't '''''YOU''''' be player 2?
:'''Mordecai''': ''[scoffs]'' I'm not usin' that sucky pickaxe.
:'''Rigby''': '''''(Gasp)''''' &lt;big&gt;'''''SEE?!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, calm down. Let's play punchies to see who gets to be player 1.
:'''Rigby''': Fine! '''''(Punches Mordicai)'''''
'''''(Mordecai punches back at Rigby causing him to fly across the couch)'''''
:'''Mordecai''': Looks like I'm player 1.
:'''Rigby''': NO! It's not fair you always get your way! '''''(angrily mocks Mordecai)''''' ''&quot;Let's play punchies, let's punchies!&quot;'' I'm sick of it! Of course I'm not gonna beat you at punchies!
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, you don't beat ''anybody'' at punchies.
:'''Rigby''': Yes I do!
:'''Mordecai''': No you don't.
'''''(Flashback of Rigby losing at a game of punchies)'''''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
'''''(End of flashback)'''''
:'''Mordecai''': We-oo! We-oo! We-oo! ''[imitating a doctor]'' Quick, doctor. Both of these buttcheeks are unrecognizable! If we want anybody to recognize this as a butt in the future, then we're gonna have to do a complete butt transplant, STAT!
:'''Rigby''': &lt;big&gt;'''''STOP TALKING!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt; There was only damage to the one cheek and you know it!
:'''Mordecai''': ''[laughs]'' That's right. We used to call you &quot;The One-Cheek Wonder!&quot; Dude, I'm bringing it back.
:'''Rigby''': You better not.
:'''Muscle Man''': Is that One-Cheek Wonder? I hope he's not trying to play punchies with cheeks like '''''that'''''!
:'''(shows Rigby's buttchecks)'''
:'''Mordecai &amp; Muscle Man''': '''''(Laughs)'''''
:'''Rigby''': '''''(Covers his buttchecks with his tail)''''' '''SHUT UP!!''' Don't look at them! '''''(Runs upstairs)''''' I'll win at punchies, you'll see! '''''(Slams the door then messes up Mordecai's side of the room)''''' Dumb Mordecai!! I hate you!!
:'''Mordecai''': '''''(Offscreen)''''' You better not be messing up my side of the room!
:'''Rigby''': '''''(Yells and picks up a phone book)''''' &lt;big&gt;'''''YOU'RE RUINING MY LIFE!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt; '''''(Throws phone book but the book bounces back at Rigby's face)''''' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
'''(Mordecai is annoyed by Rigby's screaming. He then grabs a set of headphones and continues playing)'''
:'''Rigby''': '''''(Moaning)''''' Stupid bo- (Pause) -ok? Death Kwon Do? '''''(reads the page)''''' &quot;Learn kicks, chops, and punches in moments!&quot; &quot;Unlock your full potential today&quot;? Yeeeeesss!
'''''(Cuts to the Death Kwon Do Dojo)'''''
:'''Sensai''': It's a touching story, really it is, but I don't know if you're ready for Death Kwon Do.
:'''Rigby''': Why not?
:'''Sensai''': Death Kwon Do is all about self defense. But from the sound of it, you just want to hit harder!
:'''Rigby''': Uh, no? Can you just teach me something?
:'''Sensai''': Hmm... Determination. I like that. OK, I'll teach you some beginner defensive moves. All you gotta do is pick from the sacred text of Death Kwon Do. '''''(Holds up a note book)''''' Let's see, we can start you off with the Bicep Flex of Death. Or there's the Leg Lifts of Death. That's a good beginners move, or the Pelvic Trust of Death. That's one of my personal favorites.
:'''Rigby''': That one. That's the one I want, the Death Punch. 
'''''(Shows the Death Punch of Death technique)'''''
:'''Sensai''': That, I'm afraid is not for beginners.
:'''Rigby''': What? Why?
:'''Sensai''': Because you only wanna use it to beat up your friends. You're not pure of heart!
:'''Rigby''': What!? Don't call me not pure of heart! What about you with your crappy mullet?! '''''YOU'RE''''' the one who's not pure of heart!!
:'''Sensai''': '''THAT'S IT!!!''' I'm turning my back on you and counting to 3 of death. And when I turn back around, &lt;big&gt;'''''YOU'RE TOAST!!'''''&lt;/big&gt; '''''1'''''... of death. &lt;big&gt;'''''2'''''&lt;/big&gt;... of death. 
'''''(RRRIIIIPPPP!)''''''

'''''(Sensai turns around and sees that the Death Punch of Death technique was taken away)'''''
:'''Sensai''': '''''(Gasps)''''' &lt;big&gt;'''''NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Sensai's Student''': Um, sensei? Uh... I think somebody just Death Kwon clogged the toilet.
:'''Sensai''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Rigby''': Whoa... Time to take this baby for a test drive. (screams and lands outside)
:'''(Rigby looks around, and sees Muscle Man rolling a wheelbarrow with Hi Five Ghost behind him.)'''
:'''Rigby''': (screams and runs up to them, and throws out his punch beam at them. It hits Muscle Man and Hi Five so hard it sends them flying)
:'''Muscle Man''': (hits walls, cracking it) Oh no, bro!
: '''(Screen shows Pops flying a kite)'''
:''(Rigby runs up and throws a punch beam at Pops, sending him flying into the sun)''
:'''Pops''': WOOOAAAAAOOOOAOAAAOOOAH! ''(flies toward the sun)''
:'''(Skips is fixing a lawnmover. Rigby comes up and punches Skips. Skips breaks through the shed and skids the grass, knocking over a trash can, a tree, a lamp post, a bench, and another lamp post.)'''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Rigby''': (screams insanely) '''YOU'RE NEXT, MORDECAI!'''
:'''Mordecai''': (finishes using the bathroom, humming) Alright, Rigby. Crybaby time's over. C'mon let's go get some food, I'm buy- aw what!?
'''''(Sees that the room is a mess)'''''
Rigby!? '''''UUUUGGGGGGHHH!''''' He's gonna pay for this! '''''(Picks up a book)''''' Death Kwon Do?
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Sensai''': Why yes, sir. I have the Death Jump &amp; the Death Dump right he- '''''(Sees that the Death Jump &amp; the Death Dump techniques were taken away)''''' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
'''''(Cuts to the ruined park)'''''
:'''Video Game''': D-d-d-d-d Dig Champs!
:'''Rigby''': Aw yes! It's finally happening!
:'''Mordecai''': Yep, for once being a huge baby actually worked out for you.
:'''Rigby''': '''''STOP TALKING!!!'''''
:'''Mordecai''': (Chuckles) Dude, just hurry up and play. You're just gonna die right at the beginning anyway.
:'''Rigby''': (Mimics Mordecai) Hmph! I'll show you.
'''''(Rigby plays the game, but dies by touching a snail)'''''
:'''Rigby''': '''''Aw what!?''''' Snails are bad? I thought snails were good!
:'''Mordecai''': No dude. Snails are bad.
:'''Rigby''': Aw man! This sucks. I wanna be player 2.

'''''(Episode ends)'''''

===''Free Cake'' [1.3a]===
:'''Wedding Entryman''': Do you know the bride or the groom?
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': Uhhhh...
:'''Mordecai''': The one with the cake?
:'''Wedding Entryman''': ''[quickly closes red rope to wedding]''
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': UUUUUUHH...

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Rigby''': There's that chocolate cake at the snack bar!
:'''Mordecai''': Yeah...but Benson will only let you have it for free if it's your birthday.
:'''Rigby''': Who's to say it's not my birthday?
:'''Mordecai''': ...Who's to say it's not ''my'' birthday?
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': FREE CAKE! FREE CAKE!!
:'''Benson''': It's ''neither'' of your birthdays.
:'''Rigby''': Aw, man! He's killing us with that.
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': No cake....no cake....
:'''Pops''': ''{appears from inside the bushes}'' But it ''is'' Skips' birthday!
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': FREE CAKE! FREE CAKE!!
:'''Benson''': But he's really private about it.
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': No cake....no cake....
:'''Benson''': Come to think of it, I don't think we've ''ever'' had a party for Skips.

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Rigby''': ''{groans}'' Man, it's almost eight. We're not gonna find him, let's just eat it.
:'''Mordecai''': No. Benson's gonna get pissed, so we shouldn't. (in reruns, &quot;pissed&quot; is replaced with &quot;ticked&quot;)
:'''Rigby''': Benson's gonna get like that no matter what.

===''Meat Your Maker'' [1.3b]===
:'''Mordecai''': ''[puts arms up]''
:'''Rigby''': No. No, don't.
:'''Mordecai''': It's too late. ''[begins to move arms together]''
:'''Rigby''': Come on dude, don't.
:'''Mordecai''': It's already in motion.
:'''Rigby''': Well, put it out of motion!
:'''Mordecai''': ''[crosses arms]'' You pissed me off. (in reruns, the line is changed to &quot;You ticked me off.&quot;)
:'''Rigby''': ARGH!
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
'''Mordecai''': '''''ALL YOU DO IS MESS THINGS UP, AND RUIN PEOPLE'S LIVES!'''''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Just give it up, dude. I knew you couldn't fix it...
:'''Rigby''': Dude, I fix stuff all the time!
:'''Mordecai''': No, you don't.
:'''Rigby''': What do you mean?!
:'''Mordecai''': The cart, the shoes, the party, that other party...
:'''Rigby''': Stop right there! You know Muscle Man pushed me!
:'''Mordecai''': Muscle Man wasn't even there!!
:'''Rigby''': Fine, I'll fix it.

===''Grilled Cheese Deluxe'' [1.4a]===
:''[Benson comes into the room, looking angry]''
:'''Benson''': What are you doing with my sandwich?!
:'''Mordecai''': What?
:'''Rigby''': Don't worry. I'll take care of this with my specialty. This isn't your sandwich. This is ''our'' sandwich.
:'''Benson''': This is your sandwich, huh? Then how come it says &quot;Benson&quot; on the BAG?!
:'''Rigby''': Huh? It's supposed to say &quot;Rigby,&quot; but they misspelled my name wrong.
:'''Benson''': ''[angrily screams at Mordecai and Rigby]'' '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; STOP LYING!&lt;/span&gt;'''
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, I thought you said you bought this!
:'''Benson''': '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; No, he didn't buy it! Now, get off your lazy butts and go get me another'' GRILLED CHEESE DELUXE!!!''&lt;/span&gt;''' ''[ He  slams the door furiously]''
:'''Mordecai''': ''[groans]'' Aaaagh! You ruined our day off!
:'''Rigby:''' Ah, don’t worry, dude. The line won’t be ''that'' long.
:''[Cut to Cheezer's, where there is a long line.]''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:''[Jones and Barry throw Mordecai and Rigby out of their van]''
:'''Jones''': ''(angrily threatens Mordecai and Rigby)'' If you ever lie about being astronauts again, '''YOU’RE DEAD!!!'''
:'''Rigby''': We saved the city, astro!-- ''(The astronauts throw the Cheezer's bag at Rigby and they drive away in their van.)''
:'''Benson''': Where have you been? I’ve been waiting all day! ''(Mordecai gives Benson his burnt Grilled Cheese Deluxe)'' What the--What happened to my sandwich?!
:'''Rigby''': ''[rambling]'' There were spacemen...at Cheezers...and the two...we went down it...everyone wore sweatpants...even us...and then the room with the bad stuff...but...we saved the city with your sandwich.
:'''Benson''': ''[sighs]'' Why do you ''always'' have to lie to my face?
:'''Mordecai''': We ran it over by accident.
:'''Benson''': See? Was it ''so hard'' to tell the truth?

===''The Unicorns Have Got to Go'' [1.4b]===
:'''Rigby''': If you buy that cologne, then I'm gonna lose all respect for you!
:'''Mordecai''': Good. Then we'll both have the same amount of respect for each other.

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, these guys aren't trying to help me. They're just messing with me.
:'''Rigby''': Dude, they're just partying.
:'''Mordecai''': How is this supposed to help me get the ladies?
:'''Rigby''': They got you a lady.
:''(We see a long-haired man with an open green shirt on a chair in the corner. He has stubble on his chin, a necklace, wristbands, blue jeans, and cowboy boots)''
:'''Mordecai''': That's not a lady. ''(approaches Billy, who's drinking soda with the 2nd Unicorn. He puts his hand on Billy's shoulder)'' Hey, I thought you were gonna help me with Margaret.
:'''Billy''': ''(angrily)'' Something's touching me! ''(elbows Mordecai, who flies onto the floor. The unicorns laugh)''
:'''Rigby''': Hey, bros, check this out. ''(approaches Mordecai)'' Here, let me help you up. ''(He pulls his hand away at the last second)'' &lt;big&gt;'''PSYCH!''' &lt;/big&gt; Why don't you ask Margaret to help you up? &lt;big&gt;''OHHHHH!''&lt;/big&gt;
:''(The unicorns and Rigby laugh)''
:'''Mordecai''': (angrily) You know what, Rigby? Have fun with your new friends, you jerk! Oh, and just so you know, when Benson finds out about your friends and their little hangout time, he's probably gonna fire you. Later, bro! ''[leaves]''
:'''Rigby''': ''(worriedly)'' Mordecai, wait! ''(the door shuts off-screen)''
:'''Jimmy''': ''(from upstairs)'' Bros! I found a trampoline!
:'''Rigby''': No! ''(runs up to his room)'' What are you doing to my bed?!
:'''Jimmy''': You sleep on this, bro?
:'''Rigby''': Get off it!
:'''Jimmy''': Right after this somersault! ''(flips in mid air and his horn rips the trampoline, falling to the floor. Rigby gasps)'' Bros, this trampoline's all over me! Help me get it off!
:''(The unicorns run in, chanting 'bros', and in a matter of seconds, reduce the trampoline to torn fabric and twisted metal)''
:'''Rigby''': My bed!
:''(Billy and 3rd Unicorn are shown by the closet door)''
:'''Billy''': Hey, bro. You know this ''nerd?''
:''(They open the closet door to show Benson, bound, gagged, and suspended from a coat hook. Benson rages from behind his gag, but his words are unintelligible)''
:'''Billy''': Check this out. ''(gets some gumballs out of Benson and eats them)'' What's the matter, Rigbone? You like that nerd or something?
:'''3rd Unicorn''': ''(taps Rigby's shoulder)'' Yeah, dude. Chill out! And have a ''DRINK!'' ''(sprays him with a soda can, temporarily blinding Rigby)''
:''(In his confusion, Rigby stumbles between the unicorns, who have formed a circle with the intention of repeatedly farting in his face)''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': Hey, Skips...
:'''Rigby''': We have a problem.
:'''Skips''': Unicorns?
:'''Rigby''': How'd you know?
:'''Skips''': They peed on my lawn.
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Skips''': You guys know what to do, right? 
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': Yeah.
:'''Mordecai''': ''(to the unicorns)'' Hey, Rigby, weren't we supposed to race some unicorns and not a bunch of losers?!
:'''Unicorns''': ''(Shouting all at once)'' BROS!! BROS!! BROS!!
:'''Pops''': Horseless carriages...
:'''Unicorns''': ''(Chanting &quot;Bros&quot;)''
:'''Pops''': Commence!
:''(The unicorns race off into the distance while chanting &quot;Bros&quot;)''
:'''Skips''': This is how you get rid of unicorns.
:''(Skips presses a button that forms a ramp on the ground, shooting the unicorns up into the sky, still chanting &quot;Bros&quot;)''
:'''Rigby''': But what if they come back?
:'''Benson''': They ''ain't'' ''coming'' back. ''(presses button)''
:''(The unicorns and their car explode, leaving behind stars and sparkles)''
:'''Mordecai and Rigby''': ''Cooooooool!''
:'''Benson''': That's the only way to get rid of unicorns.
:''(Scene cuts to daytime, with a close-up of a hand turning a valve and Water is shown flying from a hose. Benson is hosing down Mordecai and Rigby, who are screaming after getting soaked)''
:'''Benson:''' ''(furiously)'' I can't believe you idiots let those unicorns in here! You two morons had better get this mess cleaned up, or you'll wish it was '''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt;''YOU'' DRIVING THAT CAR! &lt;/span&gt;'''
:'''Rigby:''' The unicorn one? ''(Benson sprays Rigby with the hose and Rigby falls over screaming)'' ''COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!!!''
:'''Benson:''' ''(to Mordecai)'' And ''YOU!''
:''(Mordecai screams, shaking in fear)''
:'''Benson''': Quit spraying that cologne! It's not gonna get you any ladies! Idiots... ''[walks away]''
:'''Mordecai''': Wanna go, bro?
:'''Rigby''': Strong Johns?
:'''Mordecai''': Yeah.

===''Prank Callers'' [1.5a]===
:'''Mordecai''': ''[calls Benson]''
:'''Benson''': Hello?
:'''Mordecai''': Hey, Benson, got any books by.....Joe Mama!?
:'''Benson''': ''(angrily)'' Who is this?
:''[Mordecai and Rigby laugh loudly]''
:'''Benson''': ''[from phone]'' Wherever this is coming from, I will track you down and I will find you...!
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, he's still on the phone!
:'''Rigby''': He's &lt;big&gt;'''''STILL'''''&lt;/big&gt; on the phone!?
:'''Mordecai''': He's &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''STILL ON THE PHONE!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:''[both convulse in fits of laughter]''

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Benson''': ''(bangs the door open and furiously storms in)'' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''HANG UP THAT PHONE!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; You think your little pranks are funny, huh?! You think they're funny? Well, what do you guys think of my prank? Ring ring! Hello, what's that? Mordecai and Rigby are banned from using the house phone? Okay! ''(Goes red and angrily smashes the phone) &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; GOOD LUCK MAKING YOUR PRANK CALLS NOW!!!!&lt;/span&gt;'''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; (Slams the door furiously)''
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, let's use Pops' phone.

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Benson''': What just happened?
:'''Mordecai''': We need your help to prank the Master Prank Caller.
:'''Benson''': Who?
:'''Skips''': Why did you prank him?
:(''The telephone rings'')
:'''Benson''': I'll take care of this. ''[Answers the telephone]'' Hello?
:'''Master Prank Caller''': Nice ride, but I prefer mine better.
:'''Mordecai's Voice''': Hello?
:'''Master Prank Caller''': This is the Master Prank Caller telling you—
:'''Mordecai's Voice''': Hello?
:'''Master Prank Caller''': I said, this is the Master Prank—
:'''Mordecai's Voice''': Hello? I-I'm sorry, I can't hear you.
:'''Master Prank Caller''': [frustrated] &lt;big&gt;'''I SAID, THIS IS THE MASTER PRANK CALLER!!'''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Mordecai's Voice''': Hello? Hello, are you there?
:'''Master Prank Caller''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''RRRGH!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[WOOSH]'' I SAID—!!
:'''Mordecai's Voice''': Ha ha! Just kidding! You just got pranked, loser! ''[BEEP]''
:'''Master Prank Caller''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''NNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Now!
:''[Skips, Mordecai, Benson and Pops, jump on the Master Prank Caller and grab him by the arms and legs]''
:'''Mordecai''': Now, Rigby! Hit the power button!
:'''Rigby''': Who's the best prank caller now, jerk-dish? ''[Rigby presses the power button on the Master Prank Caller]''
:'''Master Prank Caller''': No! &lt;big&gt;'''NO!'''&lt;/big&gt; &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''NOOOO!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[Falls down on the ground, knocked out]''

===''Don'' [1.5b]===
:'''Benson''': Hey you two! Quit fooling around, we’re having an emergency meeting!
:'''Mordecai''': Aw, what?
:'''Rigby''': Boo!
:'''Benson''': '''Outside, now!'''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Benson''': Alright, everyone. I got some bad news. The park is being audited. ( He Points to Pops) Pops tried to pay the park taxes... [gives him a look] ...with lollipops.
:''[the rest of the workers voice their displeasure]''
:'''Pops''': But I gave them more than enough!
:'''Benson''': We already went over this, Pops. You pay taxes with money, not lollipops.
:'''Pops''': [sadly' Oh...
:'''Rigby''': [spits] What's the big deal? It's not like an audit is a bad thing.
:'''Benson''': It ''is'' a bad thing, Rigby! If we don't take care of this, the government takes all our stuff away.
:''[The park gang starts to panic]''
:'''Benson''': Okay. We only have till 3:00 to stop the audit. Does anyone know someone who can help us? Anybody? Anybody at all?
:'''Muscle Man''': I know someone who can help...
:'''Benson''': ''[angrily]'' If you say your mom, you're fired!
:'''Muscle Man''': ''[long pause]'' My mom!
:'''Benson''': '''GET OUT!'''
:'''Muscle Man''': It was worth it! ''[he and High Five Ghost high-five and walk away]''
:'''Mordecai''': ''[thinks]'' Hmmm... Hmph! Hey! ''[looks at Rigby]'' We know someone.
:'''Rigby''': We do? ''[Mordecai raises his arms. Suddenly, Rigby knows who he's referring to]'' No! No way!
:'''Benson''': What? If you know somebody, you've got to tell me.
:'''Mordecai''': Rigby has a brother. ''[Rigby punches him in the butt]'' And he's an accountant. ''[Rigby punches him again, rapidly]''
:'''Rigby''': SHUT UP!
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, what do you have against Don?
:''[Rigby gets mad, on the verge of crying. A ripple leads us to a flashback of Rigby's sixth birthday party. Pans down from the banner to a young Rigby]''
:'''Young Rigby''': Guys, guys, guys! ''[zooms out to reveal four bored children, one of them a young Mordecai]'' Watch me blow out the candle, guys! 
:''[A door opens. Rigby's younger brother, Don, stands in the doorway. Somehow, he is taller than Rigby]''
:'''Young Don''': Hey, Rigby. Happy birthday, bro.
:'''Young Rigby''': Wha- wha - ? '''I told you to stay in the basement.'''
:'''Young Don''': Oh. Sorry, Rigby. I just wanted to give you some birthday sugar.
:'''Young Rigby''': '''I DON'T WANT YOUR FREAKING SUGAR!'''
:'''Rigby's Friend 1''': I'll give you some sugar, Don.
:'''Rigby's Friend 2''': Yeah, me too! ''[giggles]''
:''[everyone but Mordecai gets up out of their seats to hug Don. Then, Mordecai follows, but Rigby tries to stop him by grabbing his arm]''
:'''Young Rigby''': '''DON'T YOU DARE!'''
:'''Young Mordecai''': I'm just getting some sugar, dude. ''[Rigby lets go of him]'' Besides, Don is cool.
:''[Mordecai goes to Don to give him sugar as everyone else laughs]''
:'''Rigby's Friend''': You're the best, Don!
:''[Young Rigby growls as ripple back to the present]''
:'''Mordecai''': Yeah. Don really made that party.
:'''Benson''': Call your brother.
:'''Rigby''': No!
:'''Benson''': ''CALL'' YOUR BROTHER!
:'''Rigby''': '''NO!''' I ''HATE'' HIM!!!
:'''Benson''': Fine! Mordecai, you call him.
:'''Rigby''': YOU BETTER NOT!
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, he could save the park.
:'''Rigby''': Dude, he could ruin my life! If he comes, I'm gonna tell him to leave.
:'''Benson''': No, you won't! YOU BE NICE TO YOUR BROTHER OR YOUR FIRED! ''[to Mordecai]'' Call him.
:'''Mordecai''': ''[to Rigby]'' Dude, just be cool until he stops the audit.
:''[Rigby growls, on the verge of tears.]''

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Rigby''': You guys are making a big mistake.
:'''Benson''': Don't ruin this for us, Rigby!

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Don''': Benson, give me some sugar! ''[hugs Benson]'' Nice to meet you! ''[points to Pops]'' Hey, who's this guy?
:'''Pops''': I'm Pops!
:'''Don''': Pops, give me some sugar!
:'''Pops''': ''[runs laughing to Don and hugs him]''
:'''Don''': ''[hugs Skips]'' Don. Good to meet you. ''[to Mordecai]'' Look at this sugar shack. C'mere, guy! I haven't seen you in forever.
:'''Mordecai''': ''[hugs Don]'' Yeah, I know! It's been forever!
:'''Don''': Rigby, give me some sugar, bro!
:'''Rigby''': Don't you have taxies to do? Why don't you get to it?
:'''Don''': Oh, ha ha... he was always greedy with the sugar.
:'''Rigby''': Augh...! I can't wait for you to get out of my life!
:'''Don''': What, bro?
:'''Benson''': ''[mouthing angrily]'' You keep your mouth shut!
:'''Rigby''':  Nothing.

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Don''': Rigbone! How about a little pre-saving the park sugar? You know, for almost being done saving the park?
:'''Rigby''': '''NO!'''
:'''Don''': What's going on with us? You never give me some sugar. Did I do something?
:'''Rigby''': Yeah. You were '''''BORN!'''''
:'''Don''': ''[visibly hurt]'' Wow. That's heavy. I gotta get out of here. ''[Don leaves the room]''
:'''Mordecai''': Dude? No, wait! Don!
:'''Don''': I'm sorry. I just... gotta get out of here! ''[Don continues leaving]''
&lt;hr width=75%&gt; 
:'''Benson''': Where's DON?! ''[outside, Don is shown driving away, almost crying. The others run out after him]'' Don, wait! ''[Don has already left; to the others]'' '''What happened? 
:'''Mordecai''': '''Rigby blew it! He wouldn't give Don sugar!'''
:'''Benson''': ''[Furious]'' '''&lt;big&gt;WHAT?!&lt;/big&gt;''' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''&lt;span style=&quot;color:red&quot;&gt; GO GIVE HIM SOME SUGAR!&lt;/span&gt;'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Rigby''': ''[Even more furious]'' &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''&lt;span&gt; NEVER!&lt;/span&gt;'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[runs away, panting]''

===''Rigby's Body'' [1.6a]===
:'''Mordecai''': ''[Takes a bite of the salad]'' Ahh. I feel so much better.
:'''Rigby''': ''[Who is next to a blender with a doughnut, candy and other junk food inside]'' So do I. ''[He starts the blender, grinding all the junk food into goop. He then proceeds to drink it, grimacing in pain again as his stomach rumbles]''
:'''Mordecai''': Dude, I'm telling you. If you keep eating like that, your body's gonna quit on you.
:'''Rigby''': '''''STOP TALKING!'''''
:'''Mordecai''': Whatever. I'm just trying to help. ''[Walks out of the kitchen]''
:'''Rigby''': Hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm-hmm. I showed him. ''[eats a doughnut]''

&lt;hr width=80%&gt;
:''[at MM's and Fives' shift at the snack bar]''
:'''Muscle Man''': This...''sucks''! Wait.. what is that?
:''[a bucket on a roller blade squiggles closer and closer, at the door—]''
:'''Rigby''': GIMME SOME SNACKS!!!
:'''High Five Ghost''': What are ''you~?!''
:'''Muscle Man''': Looks like a bucket of diarrhea...
:'''Rigby''': It's me, Rigby!!
:'''Muscle Man''': Oh man! THAT BOOT WITH WHEELS STOLE RIGBY'S VOICE''!!''
:'''Rigby''': No! I didn't steal anything!
:'''Muscle Man''': You're not stealin' these voices! C'mon Fives, let's bail!! ''[runs off]''
:'''Rigby''': Come back!!
:'''Muscle Man''': No way, bro!
:'''Rigby''': It's me, Rigby!! ''[falls down]'' Aw, man!

&lt;hr width=80%&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Dude. How do you feel?
:''[Due to his body's severe injuries, Rigby screams painfully; cuts to the Snack Bar, where a bleary-eyed Rigby is in a body cast and bound to a wheelchair]''
:'''Rigby''': Well, Mordecai, I guess you were right about the snack bar being lame. Especially now that we're not into eating all the free snacks.
:'''Mordecai''': Oh, about that. Those snacks weren't free.
:'''Rigby''': What?
:'''Mordecai''': Turns out, only Pops gets snacks for free.
:'''Rigby''': ''[with a pitiful whine]'' Pops?
:'''Mordecai''': Yeah. And I guess we're supposed to work here for the next six months just to pay for it all.
:'''Rigby''': Ohhh... turds!

===''Mordecai and the Rigbys'' [1.6b]===
:'''Record Player''': Now, what is the first thing that all good musicians require?
:'''Mordecai''': Talent?
:'''Record Player''': Yes!...Good personal hygiene is the key to becoming a successful gentleman musician!!

&lt;hr width=75%&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Yes, I wanna be in a band with you! Alright, but we’ve gotta have a cool band name. What do you think of...&quot;Cool Dudes?&quot;
:'''Rigby''': &quot;Face Punch!&quot;
:'''Mordecai''': &quot;Rad and Subtract?&quot;
:'''Rigby''': &quot;Helicopter Crash!&quot;
:'''Mordecai''': What about...&quot;Mustache Cashstache?&quot;
:'''Rigby''': That's it, THAT'S IT!!
:'''Mordecai''': Order the shirts! ''Order the shirts!''

==External links==
{{wikipedia|Regular Show}}
[[Category:American television seasons]]
[[Category:Children's television seasons]]
[[Category:Regular Show seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>3q9vlgr3t7zw48bnwv8akc5o3urmw91</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Angry Birds Movie</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>187625</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965047</id>
      <parentid>3960860</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:45:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39812-45</username>
        <id>3350109</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Unnecessary things removed</comment>
      <origin>3965047</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19937" sha1="aslwnyklzoukd2abs1l5v3qtez5s80l" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}

'''''{{w|The Angry Birds Movie}}''''' (also simply known as '''''Angry Birds''''') is a 2016 animated [[w:Comedy film|comedy film]] based on the [[w:Angry Birds|video game series of the same name]] by {{w|Rovio Entertainment}}. The movie features voices of {{w|Jason Sudeikis}}, {{w|Josh Gad}}, {{w|Danny McBride}} with {{w|Bill Hader}}, {{w|Tony Hale}} and [[Peter Dinklage]].

:''Directed by {{w|Clay Kaytis}} and {{w|Fergal Reilly}}. Written by Jon Vitti. A story by Mikael Hed, Mikko Pöllä and John Cohen.''

==Dialogue==

:''[First lines; Red is running through the forest carrying a fake egg.]''
:'''Red''': Okay, come on, come on, come on, come on. Oh, boy, oh, boy. Come on, let's go. Let's go, buddy. Come on, come on, we gotta move, we gotta move. ''[goes through a log and then falls down a cliff]'' Yes, yes, yes, yes! ''[grunts and starts falling]'' No, no, no, no! ''[grabs the fake egg]'' Hey, hey, gotcha! ''[swings on a vine; a snake gets caught on the vine;'' ''grunts]'' Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! I don't like it, I don't like it! ''[drops the fake egg]'' Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!!!! Oh! ''[falls down a tree and hits branches on the way down]'' Beak! Wing! Tail! Ribs! Giblets! ''[chuckles, screams and grabs the egg; the tree branch flings him up]'' I'm flying! No, still can't fly. ''[splashes, babbles and falls into the water]'' ''[muffled]'' Notta dodbly leees. ''[gasps for air]'' Breathe, breathe. ''[grabs the fake egg, goes onto land, and pulls a fish of himself]'' Bottom feeder. ''[goes up the treehouse]'' Up and over! ''[knocks on the door, and then puts on a clown costume]'' TA-DA! ''[Timothy screams in fear.]'' Ah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Look, it's okay, I'm just a clown! AH! Oh boy, that’s a loud, loud, you’re just very scared at me. Here, come here. Nope! Never mind, uh, Happy Hatchday!
:'''Edward''': Oh! Hi, pal! You must be so disappointed in yourself for being this late!
:'''Red''': Oh, no, no, no.
:'''Edward''': I’m not late, look at the time. See the order said before noon. ''[zooms to a cuckoo clock]''
:'''Cuckoo''': Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
:'''Edward''': Okay! ''Now'' you’re late.
:'''Red''': [''chuckles then took off his clown costume''] Well, you know, I'm not sure you're gonna like this, um, but since you asked, rather than being on me, as you suggested, this cake... '''''IS ON YOU!!''''' [''Red slams the cake on Edward's face.''] So, you wanna hear a story? [''Is dressing Edward in the clown costume as he is talking.''] I run my butt off, literally, mind you, to get the Gluten-Free Cake. What the heck is gluten? I mean, does gluten even exist
:'''Red''': Who needs plates when you got this guy's face, right? [''Goes as if to leave, then comes back.''] Oh, wait, I almost forgot, you know, I'm supposed to do a quick customer satisfaction survey before I... [whistles] ..Split, okay? So, on a scale of 1 to 3 stars, what would say about my performance? [starting to walk back] And don't forget, the squirrel was... [The squirrel screeches and Red is falling backwards] 'FREE'… [Trips on squirrel. Red is falling backwards right to a real egg in a nest.] SORRY ABOUT THIS!
:'''Edward''': NO!
:'''Red''': MY BAD! [Red grunts and is stopped inches away from the egg by Edward, everyone grunts and whose tail is being hanged on by Eva, whose tail is being hanged on by Timothy. Timothy notices a piece of cake on the floor, and lets go to eat it. Everyone else then falls over.] [muffled] Congratulations! [The egg is now broken, and Red is upside down in it.] It's a boy!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Baby Bird''': DADDY!
:'''Red''': [sarcastic and Baby Bird running and through on costume talking] Stop it! No, I'm not your Daddy! [Baby Bird giggling]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
[Red, Chuck, and Bomb are walking down the road. They have ashes on them.]
:'''Bomb''': I don't know what happened! I was doing the poses! I was feeling all zen! Matilda was digging it! Then I lost my grip on it. I let it slip and it just squeaked out.
:'''Chuck''': Hey, so where we going?
:'''Red''': I'm sorry, &quot;we&quot;?
:'''Chuck''': Yes, &quot;we&quot;. There's a new happiness exhibit [Runs to a sign.] at the Museum of Happiness! [Runs back.] that I'm dying to see.
:'''Red''': Uh, you know what? I... I mean I got a... I got a thing.
:'''Chuck''': A thing? Like a disease? [gasps] Is it bird flu? Chicken pox? [gasps again] Cardinal sin?
'''Red''': No. By thing, I mean like... desire not to hang out, with you.
:'''Chuck''': Oh. Oh, yeah. Well, may... you know. Maybe for the best, you know. Because... I got something too! Ha! How did I forget? Even if you'd say yes, I probably couldn't of gone. Oh. Talk about your fixer-upper. 
:'''Bomb''': I'm busy too. I have an uh... business offer... uh... deal... that is...
:'''Red''': No, Bomb. You're not good at this, buddy. It's... it's charming... up to a point... and now it's just sad.
:'''Bomb''': It's a guy I know. And he's opening up a brand, new, luxury, class reunion!
'''Red''': Okay, good. Good, good, good. [Red leaves.]
:'''Bomb''': Well, looks like it's just us. Wanna go get a bite?
:'''Chuck''': Oh, but what about your &quot;class reunion&quot;, where everybody brings a &quot;business offer&quot;.
:'''Bomb''': Oh. No, no, no. Chuck, I was lying. I'm sorry if I've fooled you.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Other Pig''': [looks down while hanging on with the pigs] AAAAAAH! [another pig hangs onto the other pigs]
:'''Leonard''': You’re not getting away that easy… [a blue egg falls down the pigs, to fall down a purple curtain]
:'''Red''': No! Save yourselves!
:'''Bomb''': Hold on, Red! 
:'''Red''': I’ve gotta save that egg!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Bomb''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''PIG CITY AIRPLANES!'''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; [blows up, and then flies back to Chuck and Mighty Eagle] I blew up... on purpose!
:'''Leonard''': You're wrecking my house! What's wrong with you?!
:'''Red''': You wrecked my house!
:'''Leonard''': Your house was ugly!
:'''Red''': Well, now we're even! [The chandelier Red and Leonard are on begins to break and the bird and fall through several rooms of the castle. They fall through a room where a pig is holding a sandwich. Red &amp; Leonard fall through, taking the pig's sandwich down with them. A pig playing bowling throws a bowling ball as Red and Leonard fall through causing all the pins to fall to the ground.]
:'''Bowling Pig''': STRIKE!
:[Red and Leonard continue falling until they land in a room filled with dynamite.]
:'''Matilda''': [rushes through the village with the other birds] Run, run! [sees a van approaching them] Guys, look out! [The van stops and a gun pops up and aims at them] Everyone, stand back! [The birds whimper. The window rolls down, revealing Terence as the driver, who's growling] Terence? [Terence give Matilda a thumbs up.] Put on your seat belts, everyone. Trust me. [Matilda closes the van doors. The pigs throw plungers and the van drives away, causing the pigs to chase after them.]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Billy the Sign''': [Is in front of anger management class building and is rocking back and forth.] Ha, ha-ha! [Red is starting to get angry.] Ha, ha-ha! [Red cools down.] Ha, ha-ha! [Red pushes the sign, but it comes back up and hits him. He then cools down again] Ha, ha-ha!
:'''Red''': ARGH! [attacks Billy] You think that's funny?! Ha ha ha! This is funny! [He throws Billy, but he flings off a tree back to him] Uh-oh! [attacking continues]
:'''Billy''': Ha-ha! [Looks up at Red] Ha!
:'''Red''': What?! [He throws and breaks the sign, and then puts it back.]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Bomb''': Well, no, I literally blow up, okay? I explode, like a bomb. [whistles like a bomb falling through the air and exploding; Chuck gasps] Hence the name! 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Red''': Terence, I got an idea! Do you think you can pull the slingshot back far enough to hit that giant boulder? [Terence growls] Okay, launch me right towards the top of that thing. [The slingshot then he low growls, to the rocks Red's until] Ready?
:'''Chuck''': Red, I'm not gonna lie to you. I am... [Sobbing] ...really gonna miss you when you die!
:'''Bomb''': Rest in peace, my friend. Rest in peace!
:'''Red''': Hey, guys. Let's not get cheesy, okay? Ready? FIRE! [growls angrily the same filled rocks after Terence launches him to the rocks with the slingshot] This is gonna hurt!
:'''King Mudbeard''': What was that? Huh? [Red's as roof crashes him] My roof!
:'''Chuck''': [''to Bomb''] Did he make it?
:'''Bomb''': I hope he's okay.
:'''Red''': I'M IN!
:'''Chuck''': 'as everyone cheers] YEAH! I KNEW HE'D MAKE IT! YAY!
:'''Red''': SEND EVERYONE ELSE!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:[''Terence plants the slingshot in the ground while Red talks to the rest of the birds]
:'''Red''': Remember, the goal is the castle. ''Get'' to the castle! Who wants to go first?
:'''Bomb''': Over here!
:'''Matilda''': I do!
:'''Bomb''': Me, me, me!
:'''Red''': Hey, alright, Matilda!
:'''Bomb''': [sighs] Always a bridesmaid.
:'''Chuck''': [as Bomb prepares to launch Matilda with the slingshot] Step right up. Keep your wings, legs and feet inside the slingshot at all times.
:'''Matilda''': SHOOT IT!
:'''Red''': Okeydoke. FIRE!
:[''Bomb launches her with the slingshot, Matilda chuckles]
:'''Earl''': [Sings] ♪ And a-1 and a— ♪ Whoa!
:'''Matilda''': Take that, Porkers!
:'''Earl''': INCOMING!
:'''Matilda''': [explodes as to the piggies] Boom, baby! Boom!
:'''Red''': Well, how about that? My teacher can shoot fireballs out of her butt. [looks at Hal] You! What's your name, Hal? I've seen you do something strange before, right?
:'''Hal''': Well, let's see, I'm really good at…
:'''Red''': Don’t matter. Launch him! [Bomb and Chuck launch him with the slingshot. Hal screams as he flies towards the castle] Oh, this guy looks good.
:'''Chuck''': He's gonna make it! [Hal babbles as he continues flying]
:'''Bomb''': This is incredible. We're witnessing history right now.
:'''Red''': No, he's coming back. He's coming, duck!
:[Hal flies like a boomerang back towards the birds]
:'''Red''': Get down!
:'''Birds''': DUCK!!'' [Hal and tree falls. Ha]
:'''Hal''': Uh! Did we win?
:'''Red''': Umm, no, not quite yet, buddy, we're still tied. Hey, can we get an ice pack for Hal?
:'''Chuck''': [shows up dressed as a doctor] Medic!
:'''Red''': Alright, who's up next? WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! What can you do?! [Cyrus sneezes and covers Red with snot, much to his disgust] Yuck!
:'''Bomb''': Um, need a tissue? [Cyrus screams as he is launched into the city, eventually landing on and sliding off a billboard reading &quot;Calvin Swine&quot;.]
:'''Red''': [to Mime] Who's next? [turns toward Mime] We need fliers, not standbyers! Let's go!
:'''Chuck''': [sarcastic] You go out there and you show them how frightening mimes can be!
:'''Bomb''': Yeah!
:'''Mime''': [Bomb launches him to the castle with the slingshot] OH MY GOD!
:'''King Mudbeard''': [Sings] We're having a feast, we're eating the eggs, gonna have a big feast... [Mime screaming] ...We're gonna eat all the eggs! [as towers crash, he gasps] WHAT?! [with then King Mudbeard]'' What is that? [''Mime's then he flies as tower crashes with the falling to get inside]
:'''Red''': FIRE!''
:'''King Mudbeard''': That guy again! [grunts]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Hatchling''': Hey, hey! [Monica hums. Red hums sarcastically. The hatchling blows à raspberry as he sticks tongue out at Red , who sticks his tongue out back. Lifts her flag, Hatchling laughs only to put it right back down. Red gasps and grunts, an old ladybird named Shirley starts walking across.]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Eva''': Your honor, our family has always practiced natural childhatch, the risks of having a scrambled infant are too great. There was gonna be music, the nest was gonna be full of beautiful fresh-cut flowers. And the first two faces he was going to see we're the loving faces that his mother, and his father… [Edward pours a tear from his eye, Timothy feels it, then laughs] we can never get that moment back!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Judge Peckinpah''': HOLY MOLY!
:[''The fireworks popping and he him with Terence chuckles as everyone cheers]
:'''Matilda''': YEAH! WHOO-HOO!
:'''Red''': Hey, look, they destroyed more of the stuff we worked hard to build.
:'''King Leonard Mudbeard''': But there’s more!
:'''Other Birds ''': More?

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:[''The engine idles and birds laugh. Young Bird #13 giggling. A into the his head over, the engine revs'']
:'''Birds''': Whoa!
:[A tires screeches, birds scream in terror and fear as he falls and finally being and with Shirley's kitchen carnage]
:'''Shirley''': I'm almost there! Don't rush me! Slow down there! [Matilda's window as then he make left]
:'''Matilda''': Deep breath, deep breath! [''Matilda breathes deeply and sighs''] And we're back, and now, who's ready for trust falls? [Terence falls as TNT Piggies lands rush me almost]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:[Flashback begins of Bomb walking into a house.]
:'''Multiple Birds''': SURPRISE! [Bomb explodes and literally blows up, destroying the entire house. The party horn honks]
:'''Bomb''': [sighs] Excuse me. Party foul. [A bird falls. Stella grunting and flashback ends]
:'''Chuck''': [Gasps] DO IT!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mighty Eagle''': Oh, look. He's blushing!
:'''Red''': I'm not blushing, I'm just red.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Leonard''': Transport the eggs!
:'''Pigs''': Trot, trot, trot… [the doors close, cuts to Chuck getting the slingshot as Terrence pull him backwards]
:'''Chuck''': Launch me exactly the same way you did with Red– [Terence launches him to the castle with the slingshot] GAH! I wasn't ready! Faster! [uses his speed ability to get inside the castle, gulps and exhausted sigh, grunts then he flies through rooms filled with kitchen utensils, hoops of fire, cacti, and pigs fighting with swords until he hits a wall. Chuck exhausted sigh]
:'''Red''': Chuck, is that you?
:'''Chuck''': [''sobbing''] This is the house of horrors.
:'''Red''': [''to Chuck''] I gotta be honest, you look a little– [Chuck with a wall] Fine! You look, fine! Come on! (Uh, where's–?)
:'''Chuck''': [''teeth by wall Red''] (If you're wondering,) Bomb's on his way.

:'''King Mudbeard''': [Grunts and laughs] CALL IN THE PIGGY AIR FORCE! [Kevin runs into hurt, as he hard rock. The pigs in the planes come out of the plane warehouse.] My royal subjects, the treasures birds have been paid our friendship with an unprovoked act of aggression, the attack will fail! We have glass, we have wood, we have TNT… [the two planes crash, cuts back to Leonard] We tryna kill them with kindness, and now we’re just gonna have to, we’ll, you know…
:'''Pilot ''': Bye Bye! ''[drops the stick on dynamite to explode onto the birds]''
:'''Mime''': RUN!!
:'''Other Bird''': Who’s gonna go next?
:'''Terrence''': [pushes other colored birds]
:[Terence gets a slingshot, the planes fly around]
:'''Other Bird #2''': Aim for that ramp! 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Mighty Eagle''': Coming in. Coming in. MIGHTY EAGLE! [smashes into the Piggies castle, but clumsily lands and smashes his head on the golden pot.]
:'''Red''': Mi– Mighty Eagle! Mighty Eagle, wake up! [runs over to Mighty Eagle and slaps his eye with his tongue] Come on! [grunts] You've got bad breath!
:'''Mighty Eagle''': [weakly] I can sleep late, Mom. It's not a school day.
:'''Leonard Mudbeard''': Throw them in the pot too! I’ll have the big turkey!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red''': [''whispers to Chuck and Bomb''] Well… not so much the &quot;Lake of Wisdom&quot;, more like the &quot;Lake of Whiz&quot;.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Stella''': Did he say &quot;eat the eggs&quot;? [Helene gags. Bomb launches him to the tower with slingshot, the muffled screams as tower crashes. Mighty Eagle grunts softly.]
:'''Red''': Okay, I want you to curl up into a little ball. All right, make yourself aerodynamic.
:'''Bubbles''': Like this? [inhales deeply]
:'''Chuck''': To the left, to the left!
:'''Bubbles''': Lemme at 'em!
:'''Red''': LAUNCH! [Bubbles screams. Chuck launches Bubbles with the slingshot, wall crashes flies as then he falling facing curl ball little into inside get over his with blows lands and his head on the into the Piggies holding his gavel Bubbles' bad giant far boulder and starts cool down, and breaks the towards direction, aerodynamic he softly hits inside comes.]
:'''Bubbles''': Don't mess with Bubbles! [gets pigpiled, then inflates] I TOLD YOU NOT TO MESS WITH ME!
:'''Red''': Wow, that blows. Uh, in a good way.
:'''Chuck''': [Stella's in with then hits] To the left!
:'''Bomb''': [gasps and stammers] Ho...! Hold on... Hold on, wait! My left or your left?
:'''Chuck''': Ugh, my left is your left. We are facing the same direction!
:'''Bomb''': Right, good call.
:'''Red''': Just look where the last bird went and adjust from there.
:'''Stella''': I got this, you guys. [''Bomb launches him to the pigs with the slingshot, Stella uses her speed ability to get inside, bird went call honest house, grunting and pig's and the Stella screams slow-motion, normal in Stella grunting and falling then she flies through until she hits a shatters, Stella coughs and pigs gasp'']
:'''Red''': She got far, but ''not'' far enough!
:'''Stella''': Uh-oh! [A pigs plunger for facing where bird]
:'''Red''': We have to get closer.
:[''Bomb launches Judge Peckinpah being shot from the slingshot'']
:'''Judge Peckinpah''': [being shot from the slingshot and holding his gavel] Judge Power…[The tower crashes and Judge Peckinpah from so much] AH!!
:[Chuck and Bomb launches and slingshot]
:'''Chuck''': Uh-oh!
:'''Bomb''': TRIAL BY FIRE!
:'''Chuck''': No, literally, he's on fire right now. Can somebody please help him?

==Cast==
* {{w|Jason Sudeikis}} as Red
** Aidan McGraw and Kallan Holley (young)

* {{w|Josh Gad}} as Chuck

* {{w|Danny McBride}} as Bomb

* {{w|Bill Hader}} as Leonard / Chuckles / King Mudbeard

* [[Peter Dinklage]] as Mighty Eagle

===Supporting===
* {{w|Maya Rudolph}} as Matilda and Poppy

* {{w|Tony Hale}} as Ross, Cyrus and the Mime

* [[Sean Penn]] as Terence

* [[w:Kate McKinnon|Kate McKinnon]] as Stella, Eva and Courtney

* {{w|Keegan-Michael Key}} as Judge Peckinpah

* {{w|Blake Shelton}} as Earl

* [[Smosh]] as
** Hal voiced by Anthony Padilla
** Bubbles voiced by Ian Hecox

===Recurring===
* [[w:Charli XCX|Charli XCX]] as Willow

* [[w:Tituss Burgess|Tituss Burgess]] as Photog

* [[w:Billy Eichner|Billy Eichner]] as Chef Pig and Phillip

* [[w:Hannibal Buress|Hannibal Buress]] as Edward

* [[w:Ike Barinholtz|Ike Barinholtz]] as Tiny

* [[w:Max Charles|Max Charles]] as Bobby

* [[w:Jillian Bell|Jillian Bell]] as Bobby’s Mom

* [[w:Cristela Alonzo|Cristela Alonzo]] as Shirley

* [[w:Danielle Brooks|Danielle Brooks]] as The Crossing Guard Bird

* [[w:Romeo Santos|Romeo Santos]] as Early Bird

* [[w:Geoffrey Arend|Geoffrey Arend]] as Day Care Teacher

* [[w:Ava Acres|Ava Acres]] as Timothy

* [[w:Alex Borstein|Alex Borstein]] as Sophie Bird and Peggy Bird

* [[w:Josh Robert Thompson|Josh Robert Thompson]] as [[Brad Bird]] and Dane the Saxophone Bird

* [[w:Fred Tatasciore|Fred Tatasciore]] as Monty Pig

* [[w:John Cohen|John Cohen]] as Johnny Bird

* [[w:Clay Kaytis|Clay Kaytis]] as Clayton the Waiter Bird

==See also==
* [[The Angry Birds Movie 2]]
* [[Angry Birds: Summer Madness (TV series)|Angry Birds Summer Madness: The Series]]

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|1985949}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Angry Birds Movie, The}}
[[Category:2016 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2016 American animated films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Finnish animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:War films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on video games]]
[[Category:Animated films about birds]]
[[Category:Animated films about pigs]]
[[Category:Films based on video games]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]</text>
      <sha1>aslwnyklzoukd2abs1l5v3qtez5s80l</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965111</id>
      <parentid>3965047</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:40:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-24694-08</username>
        <id>3313356</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965111</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19936" sha1="do5hhwswwqth5ly0u977kjn3uy8dgg3" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}

'''''{{w|The Angry Birds Movie}}''''' (also simply known as '''''Angry Birds''''') is a 2016 animated [[w:Comedy film|comedy film]] based on the [[w:Angry Birds|video game series of the same name]] by {{w|Rovio Entertainment}}. The movie features voices of {{w|Jason Sudeikis}}, {{w|Josh Gad}}, {{w|Danny McBride}} with {{w|Bill Hader}}, {{w|Tony Hale}} and [[Peter Dinklage]].

:''Directed by {{w|Clay Kaytis}} and {{w|Fergal Reilly}}. Written by Jon Vitti. A story by Mikael Hed, Mikko Pöllä and John Cohen.''

==Dialogue==

:''[First lines; Red is running through the forest carrying a fake egg.]''
:'''Red''': Okay, come on, come on, come on, come on. Oh, boy, oh, boy. Come on, let's go. Let's go, buddy. Come on, come on, we gotta move, we gotta move. ''[goes through a log and then falls down a cliff]'' Yes, yes, yes, yes! ''[grunts and starts falling]'' No, no, no, no! ''[grabs the fake egg]'' Hey, hey, gotcha! ''[swings on a vine; a snake gets caught on the vine;'' ''grunts]'' Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! I don't like it, I don't like it! ''[drops the fake egg]'' Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!!!! Oh! ''[falls down a tree and hits branches on the way down]'' Beak! Wing! Tail! Ribs! Giblets! ''[chuckles, screams and grabs the egg; the tree branch flings him up]'' I'm flying! No, still can't fly. ''[splashes, babbles and falls into the water]'' ''[muffled]'' Notta dodbly leees. ''[gasps for air]'' Breathe, breathe. ''[grabs the fake egg, goes onto land, and pulls a fish of himself]'' Bottom feeder. ''[goes up the treehouse]'' Up and over! ''[knocks on the door, and then puts on a clown costume]'' TA-DA! ''[Timothy screams in fear.]'' Ah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Look, it's okay, I'm just a clown! AH! Oh boy, that’s a loud, loud, you’re just very scared at me. Here, come here. Nope! Never mind, uh, Happy Hatchday!
:'''Edward''': Oh! Hi, pal! You must be so disappointed in yourself for being this late!
:'''Red''': Oh, no, no, no.
:'''Edward''': I’m not late, look at the time. See the order said before noon. ''[zooms to a cuckoo clock]''
:'''Cuckoo''': Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
:'''Edward''': Okay! ''Now'' you’re late.
:'''Red''': [''chuckles then took off his clown costume''] Well, you know, I'm not sure you're gonna like this, um, but since you asked, rather than being on me, as you suggested, this cake... '''''IS ON YOU!!''''' [''Red slams the cake on Edward's face.''] So, you wanna hear a story? [''Is dressing Edward in the clown costume as he is talking.''] I run my butt off, literally, mind you, to get the Gluten-Free Cake. What the heck is gluten? I mean, does gluten even exist
:'''Red''': Who needs plates when you got this guy's face, right? [''Goes as if to leave, then comes back.''] Oh, wait, I almost forgot, you know, I'm supposed to do a quick customer satisfaction survey before I... [whistles] ..Split, okay? So, on a scale of 1 to 3 stars, what would say about my performance? [starting to walk back] And don't forget, the squirrel was... [The squirrel screeches and Red is falling backwards] 'FREE'… [Trips on squirrel. Red is falling backwards right to a real egg in a nest.] SORRY ABOUT THIS!
:'''Edward''': NO!
:'''Red''': MY BAD! [Red grunts and is stopped inches away from the egg by Edward, everyone grunts and whose tail is being hanged on by Eva, whose tail is being hanged on by Timothy. Timothy notices a piece of cake on the floor, and lets go to eat it. Everyone else then falls over.] [muffled] Congratulations! [The egg is now broken, and Red is upside down in it.] It's a boy!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Baby Bird''': DADDY!
:'''Red''': [sarcastic and Baby Bird running and through on costume talking] Stop it! No, I'm not your Daddy! [Baby Bird giggling]
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
[Red, Chuck, and Bomb are walking down the road. They have ashes on them.]
:'''Bomb''': I don't know what happened! I was doing the poses! I was feeling all zen! Matilda was digging it! Then I lost my grip on it. I let it slip and it just squeaked out.
:'''Chuck''': Hey, so where we going?
:'''Red''': I'm sorry, &quot;we&quot;?
:'''Chuck''': Yes, &quot;we&quot;. There's a new happiness exhibit [Runs to a sign.] at the Museum of Happiness! [Runs back.] that I'm dying to see.
:'''Red''': Uh, you know what? I... I mean I got a... I got a thing.
:'''Chuck''': A thing? Like a disease? [gasps] Is it bird flu? Chicken pox? [gasps again] Cardinal sin?
'''Red''': No. By thing, I mean like... desire not to hang out, with you.
:'''Chuck''': Oh. Oh, yeah. Well, may... you know. Maybe for the best, you know. Because... I got something too! Ha! How did I forget? Even if you'd say yes, I probably couldn't of gone. Oh. Talk about your fixer-upper. 
:'''Bomb''': I'm busy too. I have an uh... business offer... uh... deal... that is...
:'''Red''': No, Bomb. You're not good at this, buddy. It's... it's charming... up to a point... and now it's just sad.
:'''Bomb''': It's a guy I know. And he's opening up a brand, new, luxury, class reunion!
'''Red''': Okay, good. Good, good, good. [Red leaves.]
:'''Bomb''': Well, looks like it's just us. Wanna go get a bite?
:'''Chuck''': Oh, but what about your &quot;class reunion&quot;, where everybody brings a &quot;business offer&quot;.
:'''Bomb''': Oh. No, no, no. Chuck, I was lying. I'm sorry if I've fooled you.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Other Pig''': [looks down while hanging on with the pigs] AAAAAAH! [another pig hangs onto the other pigs]
:'''Leonard''': You’re not getting away that easy… [a blue egg falls down the pigs, to fall down a purple curtain]
:'''Red''': No! Save yourselves!
:'''Bomb''': Hold on, Red! 
:'''Red''': I’ve gotta save that egg!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Bomb''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''PIG CITY AIRPLANES!'''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; [blows up, and then flies back to Chuck and Mighty Eagle] I blew up... on purpose!
:'''Leonard''': You're wrecking my house! What's wrong with you?!
:'''Red''': You wrecked my house!
:'''Leonard''': Your house was ugly!
:'''Red''': Well, now we're even! [The chandelier Red and Leonard are on begins to break and the bird and fall through several rooms of the castle. They fall through a room where a pig is holding a sandwich. Red &amp; Leonard fall through, taking the pig's sandwich down with them. A pig playing bowling throws a bowling ball as Red and Leonard fall through causing all the pins to fall to the ground.]
:'''Bowling Pig''': STRIKE!
:[Red and Leonard continue falling until they land in a room filled with dynamite.]
:'''Matilda''': [rushes through the village with the other birds] Run, run! [sees a van approaching them] Guys, look out! [The van stops and a gun pops up and aims at them] Everyone, stand back! [The birds whimper. The window rolls down, revealing Terence as the driver, who's growling] Terence? [Terence give Matilda a thumbs up.] Put on your seat belts, everyone. Trust me. [Matilda closes the van doors. The pigs throw plungers and the van drives away, causing the pigs to chase after them.]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Billy the Sign''': [Is in front of anger management class building and is rocking back and forth.] Ha, ha-ha! [Red is starting to get angry.] Ha, ha-ha! [Red cools down.] Ha, ha-ha! [Red pushes the sign, but it comes back up and hits him. He then cools down again] Ha, ha-ha!
:'''Red''': ARGH! [attacks Billy] You think that's funny?! Ha ha ha! This is funny! [He throws Billy, but he flings off a tree back to him] Uh-oh! [attacking continues]
:'''Billy''': Ha-ha! [Looks up at Red] Ha!
:'''Red''': What?! [He throws and breaks the sign, and then puts it back.]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Bomb''': Well, no, I literally blow up, okay? I explode, like a bomb. [whistles like a bomb falling through the air and exploding; Chuck gasps] Hence the name! 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Red''': Terence, I got an idea! Do you think you can pull the slingshot back far enough to hit that giant boulder? [Terence growls] Okay, launch me right towards the top of that thing. [The slingshot then he low growls, to the rocks Red's until] Ready?
:'''Chuck''': Red, I'm not gonna lie to you. I am... [Sobbing] ...really gonna miss you when you die!
:'''Bomb''': Rest in peace, my friend. Rest in peace!
:'''Red''': Hey, guys. Let's not get cheesy, okay? Ready? FIRE! [growls angrily the same filled rocks after Terence launches him to the rocks with the slingshot] This is gonna hurt!
:'''King Mudbeard''': What was that? Huh? [Red's as roof crashes him] My roof!
:'''Chuck''': [''to Bomb''] Did he make it?
:'''Bomb''': I hope he's okay.
:'''Red''': I'M IN!
:'''Chuck''': 'as everyone cheers] YEAH! I KNEW HE'D MAKE IT! YAY!
:'''Red''': SEND EVERYONE ELSE!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:[''Terence plants the slingshot in the ground while Red talks to the rest of the birds]
:'''Red''': Remember, the goal is the castle. ''Get'' to the castle! Who wants to go first?
:'''Bomb''': Over here!
:'''Matilda''': I do!
:'''Bomb''': Me, me, me!
:'''Red''': Hey, alright, Matilda!
:'''Bomb''': [sighs] Always a bridesmaid.
:'''Chuck''': [as Bomb prepares to launch Matilda with the slingshot] Step right up. Keep your wings, legs and feet inside the slingshot at all times.
:'''Matilda''': SHOOT IT!
:'''Red''': Okeydoke. FIRE!
:[''Bomb launches her with the slingshot, Matilda chuckles]
:'''Earl''': [Sings] ♪ And a-1 and a— ♪ Whoa!
:'''Matilda''': Take that, Porkers!
:'''Earl''': INCOMING!
:'''Matilda''': [explodes as to the piggies] Boom, baby! Boom!
:'''Red''': Well, how about that? My teacher can shoot fireballs out of her butt. [looks at Hal] You! What's your name, Hal? I've seen you do something strange before, right?
:'''Hal''': Well, let's see, I'm really good at…
:'''Red''': Don’t matter. Launch him! [Bomb and Chuck launch him with the slingshot. Hal screams as he flies towards the castle] Oh, this guy looks good.
:'''Chuck''': He's gonna make it! [Hal babbles as he continues flying]
:'''Bomb''': This is incredible. We're witnessing history right now.
:'''Red''': No, he's coming back. He's coming, duck!
:[Hal flies like a boomerang back towards the birds]
:'''Red''': Get down!
:'''Birds''': DUCK!!'' [Hal and tree falls. Ha]
:'''Hal''': Uh! Did we win?
:'''Red''': Umm, no, not quite yet, buddy, we're still tied. Hey, can we get an ice pack for Hal?
:'''Chuck''': [shows up dressed as a doctor] Medic!
:'''Red''': Alright, who's up next? WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! What can you do?! [Cyrus sneezes and covers Red with snot, much to his disgust] Yuck!
:'''Bomb''': Um, need a tissue? [Cyrus screams as he is launched into the city, eventually landing on and sliding off a billboard reading &quot;Calvin Swine&quot;.]
:'''Red''': [to Mime] Who's next? [turns toward Mime] We need fliers, not standbyers! Let's go!
:'''Chuck''': [sarcastic] You go out there and you show them how frightening mimes can be!
:'''Bomb''': Yeah!
:'''Mime''': [Bomb launches him to the castle with the slingshot] OH MY GOD!
:'''King Mudbeard''': [Sings] We're having a feast, we're eating the eggs, gonna have a big feast... [Mime screaming] ...We're gonna eat all the eggs! [as towers crash, he gasps] WHAT?! [with then King Mudbeard]'' What is that? [''Mime's then he flies as tower crashes with the falling to get inside]
:'''Red''': FIRE!''
:'''King Mudbeard''': That guy again! [grunts]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Hatchling''': Hey, hey! [Monica hums. Red hums sarcastically. The hatchling blows à raspberry as he sticks tongue out at Red , who sticks his tongue out back. Lifts her flag, Hatchling laughs only to put it right back down. Red gasps and grunts, an old ladybird named Shirley starts walking across.]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Eva''': Your honor, our family has always practiced natural childhatch, the risks of having a scrambled infant are too great. There was gonna be music, the nest was gonna be full of beautiful fresh-cut flowers. And the first two faces he was going to see we're the loving faces that his mother, and his father… [Edward pours a tear from his eye, Timothy feels it, then laughs] we can never get that moment back!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Judge Peckinpah''': HOLY MOLY!
:[''The fireworks popping and he him with Terence chuckles as everyone cheers]
:'''Matilda''': YEAH! WHOO-HOO!
:'''Red''': Hey, look, they destroyed more of the stuff we worked hard to build.
:'''King Leonard Mudbeard''': But there’s more!
:'''Other Birds ''': More?

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:[''The engine idles and birds laugh. Young Bird #13 giggling. A into the his head over, the engine revs'']
:'''Birds''': Whoa!
:[A tires screeches, birds scream in terror and fear as he falls and finally being and with Shirley's kitchen carnage]
:'''Shirley''': I'm almost there! Don't rush me! Slow down there! [Matilda's window as then he make left]
:'''Matilda''': Deep breath, deep breath! [''Matilda breathes deeply and sighs''] And we're back, and now, who's ready for trust falls? [Terence falls as TNT Piggies lands rush me almost]

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:[Flashback begins of Bomb walking into a house.]
:'''Multiple Birds''': SURPRISE! [Bomb explodes and literally blows up, destroying the entire house. The party horn honks]
:'''Bomb''': [sighs] Excuse me. Party foul. [A bird falls. Stella grunting and flashback ends]
:'''Chuck''': [Gasps] DO IT!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mighty Eagle''': Oh, look. He's blushing!
:'''Red''': I'm not blushing, I'm just red.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Leonard''': Transport the eggs!
:'''Pigs''': Trot, trot, trot… [the doors close, cuts to Chuck getting the slingshot as Terrence pull him backwards]
:'''Chuck''': Launch me exactly the same way you did with Red– [Terence launches him to the castle with the slingshot] GAH! I wasn't ready! Faster! [uses his speed ability to get inside the hole of the castle, then gulps and grunts as he flies through rooms filled with kitchen utensils, hoops of fire, cacti, and pigs fighting with swords until he hits a wall. Chuck exhausted sigh]
:'''Red''': Chuck, is that you?
:'''Chuck''': [''sobbing''] This is the house of horrors.
:'''Red''': [''to Chuck''] I gotta be honest, you look a little– [Chuck with a wall] Fine! You look, fine! Come on! (Uh, where's–?)
:'''Chuck''': [''teeth by wall Red''] (If you're wondering,) Bomb's on his way.

:'''King Mudbeard''': [Grunts and laughs] CALL IN THE PIGGY AIR FORCE! [Kevin runs into hurt, as he hard rock. The pigs in the planes come out of the plane warehouse.] My royal subjects, the treasures birds have been paid our friendship with an unprovoked act of aggression, the attack will fail! We have glass, we have wood, we have TNT… [the two planes crash, cuts back to Leonard] We tryna kill them with kindness, and now we’re just gonna have to, we’ll, you know…
:'''Pilot ''': Bye Bye! ''[drops the stick on dynamite to explode onto the birds]''
:'''Mime''': RUN!!
:'''Other Bird''': Who’s gonna go next?
:'''Terrence''': [pushes other colored birds]
:[Terence gets a slingshot, the planes fly around]
:'''Other Bird #2''': Aim for that ramp! 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;

:'''Mighty Eagle''': Coming in. Coming in. MIGHTY EAGLE! [smashes into the Piggies castle, but clumsily lands and smashes his head on the golden pot.]
:'''Red''': Mi– Mighty Eagle! Mighty Eagle, wake up! [runs over to Mighty Eagle and slaps his eye with his tongue] Come on! [grunts] You've got bad breath!
:'''Mighty Eagle''': [weakly] I can sleep late, Mom. It's not a school day.
:'''Leonard Mudbeard''': Throw them in the pot too! I’ll have the big turkey!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Red''': [''whispers to Chuck and Bomb''] Well… not so much the &quot;Lake of Wisdom&quot;, more like the &quot;Lake of Whiz&quot;.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Stella''': Did he say &quot;eat the eggs&quot;? [Helene gags. Bomb launches him to the tower with slingshot, the muffled screams as tower crashes. Mighty Eagle grunts softly.]
:'''Red''': Okay, I want you to curl up into a little ball. All right, make yourself aerodynamic.
:'''Bubbles''': Like this? [inhales deeply]
:'''Chuck''': To the left, to the left!
:'''Bubbles''': Lemme at 'em!
:'''Red''': LAUNCH! [Bubbles screams. Chuck launches Bubbles with the slingshot, wall crashes flies as then he falling facing curl ball little into inside get over his with blows lands and his head on the into the Piggies holding his gavel Bubbles' bad giant far boulder and starts cool down, and breaks the towards direction, aerodynamic he softly hits inside comes.]
:'''Bubbles''': Don't mess with Bubbles! [gets pigpiled, then inflates] I TOLD YOU NOT TO MESS WITH ME!
:'''Red''': Wow, that blows. Uh, in a good way.
:'''Chuck''': [Stella's in with then hits] To the left!
:'''Bomb''': [gasps and stammers] Ho...! Hold on... Hold on, wait! My left or your left?
:'''Chuck''': Ugh, my left is your left. We are facing the same direction!
:'''Bomb''': Right, good call.
:'''Red''': Just look where the last bird went and adjust from there.
:'''Stella''': I got this, you guys. [''Bomb launches him to the pigs with the slingshot, Stella uses her speed ability to get inside, bird went call honest house, grunting and pig's and the Stella screams slow-motion, normal in Stella grunting and falling then she flies through until she hits a shatters, Stella coughs and pigs gasp'']
:'''Red''': She got far, but ''not'' far enough!
:'''Stella''': Uh-oh! [A pigs plunger for facing where bird]
:'''Red''': We have to get closer.
:[''Bomb launches Judge Peckinpah being shot from the slingshot'']
:'''Judge Peckinpah''': [being shot from the slingshot and holding his gavel] Judge Power…[The tower crashes and Judge Peckinpah from so much] AH!!
:[Chuck and Bomb launches and slingshot]
:'''Chuck''': Uh-oh!
:'''Bomb''': TRIAL BY FIRE!
:'''Chuck''': No, literally, he's on fire right now. Can somebody please help him?

==Cast==
* {{w|Jason Sudeikis}} as Red
** Aidan McGraw and Kallan Holley (young)

* {{w|Josh Gad}} as Chuck

* {{w|Danny McBride}} as Bomb

* {{w|Bill Hader}} as Leonard / Chuckles / King Mudbeard

* [[Peter Dinklage]] as Mighty Eagle

===Supporting===
* {{w|Maya Rudolph}} as Matilda and Poppy

* {{w|Tony Hale}} as Ross, Cyrus and the Mime

* [[Sean Penn]] as Terence

* [[w:Kate McKinnon|Kate McKinnon]] as Stella, Eva and Courtney

* {{w|Keegan-Michael Key}} as Judge Peckinpah

* {{w|Blake Shelton}} as Earl

* [[Smosh]] as
** Hal voiced by Anthony Padilla
** Bubbles voiced by Ian Hecox

===Recurring===
* [[w:Charli XCX|Charli XCX]] as Willow

* [[w:Tituss Burgess|Tituss Burgess]] as Photog

* [[w:Billy Eichner|Billy Eichner]] as Chef Pig and Phillip

* [[w:Hannibal Buress|Hannibal Buress]] as Edward

* [[w:Ike Barinholtz|Ike Barinholtz]] as Tiny

* [[w:Max Charles|Max Charles]] as Bobby

* [[w:Jillian Bell|Jillian Bell]] as Bobby’s Mom

* [[w:Cristela Alonzo|Cristela Alonzo]] as Shirley

* [[w:Danielle Brooks|Danielle Brooks]] as The Crossing Guard Bird

* [[w:Romeo Santos|Romeo Santos]] as Early Bird

* [[w:Geoffrey Arend|Geoffrey Arend]] as Day Care Teacher

* [[w:Ava Acres|Ava Acres]] as Timothy

* [[w:Alex Borstein|Alex Borstein]] as Sophie Bird and Peggy Bird

* [[w:Josh Robert Thompson|Josh Robert Thompson]] as [[Brad Bird]] and Dane the Saxophone Bird

* [[w:Fred Tatasciore|Fred Tatasciore]] as Monty Pig

* [[w:John Cohen|John Cohen]] as Johnny Bird

* [[w:Clay Kaytis|Clay Kaytis]] as Clayton the Waiter Bird

==See also==
* [[The Angry Birds Movie 2]]
* [[Angry Birds: Summer Madness (TV series)|Angry Birds Summer Madness: The Series]]

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|1985949}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Angry Birds Movie, The}}
[[Category:2016 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2016 American animated films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Finnish animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:War films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on video games]]
[[Category:Animated films about birds]]
[[Category:Animated films about pigs]]
[[Category:Films based on video games]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]</text>
      <sha1>do5hhwswwqth5ly0u977kjn3uy8dgg3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Justice League: Throne of Atlantis</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>188303</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965139</id>
      <parentid>3953253</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:15:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965139</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6046" sha1="rh8gsjwug7c3jhg27ohnwbqlwk2vyhm" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Justice League: Throne of Atlantis|Justice League: Throne of Atlantis]]''''' is a [[w:2015 in film|2015]] direct-to-video animated superhero film featuring the [[w:DC Comics|DC Comics]] superhero team the [[w:Justice League|Justice League]], which is part of the [[w:DC Universe Animated Original Movies|DC Universe Animated Original Movies]]. The film is loosely based on the ''[[w:Throne of Atlantis|Throne of Atlantis]]'' story arc from [[w:The New 52|The New 52]] written by [[w:Geoff Johns|Geoff Johns]] and serves as a standalone sequel to 2014's ''[[Justice League: War]]''. In the film, [[w:Aquaman|Arthur Curry]], a half-[[w:Atlantis (comics)|Atlantean]] prince, discovers his heritage and aids the Justice League in preventing his half-brother [[w:Ocean Master|Ocean Master]] from taking over [[w:Metropolis (comics)|Metropolis]]. 
{{center|'''Blood is thicker than water.''' [[#Taglines|taglines]]}}

== Green Lantern ==
* What does a mythical, mystical, undersea world need with missiles? [''pauses''] And I so dare you to say that five times fast.

== Other ==
* '''Arthur Curry''': We weren't done talking.
* '''Lois Lane''': (''about Wonder Woman'') I would not want to be on her bad side.
* '''Hal Jordan''': I'm gonna disembowel you, Barry.
* '''Shazam''': (''to Cyborg after they find Superman and Wonder Woman together'') Are they on a date?
* '''Diana Prince''': (''to Lois'') No, it's a date.

== Dialogue ==
:'''Green Lantern''': I'll tell you, Flash-Man, I have seen my share of weirdo crapola in this job. But Atlantis? Come on.
:'''Flash''': But you're good with the intergalactic cops, aliens, and the cybernetic human?
:'''Green Lantern''': What can I say? Magic gives me the heebie jeebies.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:(''Ocean Master is close to killing Arthur until Cyborg displays a holographic footage of Orm's confession'')
:'''Mera in Footage''': You killed her!
:'''Ocean Master in Footage''': I did.
:'''Ocean Master''': What is this?!
:'''Ocean Master in Footage''': I ran the sword through her myself as she mewled for peace. You can count yourself fortunate, bastard. At least our mother won't be the impediment to your life that she was to mine.
:(''footage plays again'')
:'''Atlantean Soldier''': Orm killed our Queen?! We are betrayed! (''the Atlanteans turn against Orm'')
:'''Ocean Master''': No. Wait. This deception is their surface magic!
:'''Mera''': Liar! I was there when Orm boasted of the murder of our queen. It was as you see.
:'''Ocean Master''': I am your king. I did this for you!
:(''Arthur then punches Orm in the face, breaking half of his mask and bleeding his nose'')
:'''Aquaman''': Is this the king you want, Atlanteans? A coward who lies to you? You need a light to guide you in the darkness, people of Atlantis. My people.
:'''Mera''': What are you doing?
:'''Aquaman''': Becoming a beacon. I was born of two worlds. Atlantean by birth. Human by instinct. Join me and we will bridge those worlds in peace.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:(''Arthur joins the Justice League'') 
:'''Cyborg''': He needs a codename.
:'''Shazam''': Yeah? Well, online, they're calling him &quot;Aquaman&quot;.
:'''Aquaman''': Hate that.
:'''Green Lantern''': Aquaman it is!

== Taglines==
* Blood is thicker than water.

==Cast==
* [[w:Matt Lanter|Matt Lanter]] - [[w:Aquaman|Arthur Curry/Aquaman]]
* [[Sumalee Montano]] - [[w:Mera (comics)|Mera]]
* [[w:Sam Witwer|Sam Witwer]] - [[w:Ocean Master|Orm Marius/Ocean Master]]
* [[w:Sirena Irwin|Sirena Irwin]] - [[w:Queen Atlanna|Queen Atlanna]]
* [[w:Jerry O'Connell|Jerry O'Connell]] - [[w:Superman|Kal-El/Clark Kent/Superman]]
* [[w:Jason O'Mara|Jason O'Mara]] - [[w:Batman|Bruce Wayne/Batman]]
* [[w:Rosario Dawson|Rosario Dawson]] - [[w:Wonder Woman|Princess Diana/Diana Prince/Wonder Woman]]
* [[w:Christopher Gorham|Christopher Gorham]] - [[w:Flash (Barry Allen)|Barry Allen/The Flash]]
* [[w:Nathan Fillion|Nathan Fillion]] - [[w:Hal Jordan|Hal Jordan/Green Lantern]]
* [[w:Shemar Moore|Shemar Moore]] - [[w:Cyborg (comics)|Victor Stone/Cyborg]]
* [[w:Sean Astin|Sean Astin]] -  [[w:Captain Marvel (DC Comics)|Billy Batson/Shazam]]
* [[w:Juliet Landau|Juliet Landau]] - [[w:Lois Lane|Lois Lane]]
* [[w:George Newbern|George Newbern]] - [[w:Steve Trevor|Steve Trevor]]
* [[w:Harry Lennix|Harry Lennix]] - [[w:Black Manta|Black Manta]]
* [[w:Steven Blum|Steven Blum]] - [[w:Lex Luthor|Lex Luthor]], Cyborg's Armor 
* Melique Berger - Dr. Sarah Charles
* [[w:Patrick Cavanaugh|Patrick Cavanaugh]] - [[w:Jimmy Olsen|Jimmy Olsen]]
* [[w:Larry Cedar|Larry Cedar]] - Thomas Curry
* [[w:Khary Payton|Khary Payton]] - [[w:Steel (John Henry Irons)|John Henry Irons]]
* Jay K. Johnson - [[w:Sam Lane (comics)|General Sam Lane]]
* [[w:Matthew Yang King|Matthew Yang King]] - Dr. Stephen Shin
* DJ Price - Young [[w:Aquaman|Arthur Curry]]
* [[w:Barry Dennen|Barry Dennen]] - Defense Advisor
* [[w:Paul Eiding|Paul Eiding]] - Captain
* [[w:Michael Rosenbaum|Michael Rosenbaum]] - Drift Leader
* [[Andrea Romano (voice director)|Andrea Romano]] - Elderly Atlantean Woman 
* [[w:Cedric Yarbrough|Cedric Yarbrough]] - Submarine Technician

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=3878542|title=Justice League: Throne of Atlantis}}
* {{wikipedia-inline}}

{{Batman}}
{{Authority control}}
{{DC Comics animated films}}

[[Category:DC Comics direct-to-video animated films]]
[[Category:2015 animated films]]
[[Category:2015 American animated films]]
[[Category:2015 American adult animated films]]
[[Category:2010s American adult animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American adult animated action films]]
[[Category:American adult animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Comic book films]]
[[Category:Animated Justice League films]]
[[Category:Direct-to-video animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Animated Batman films]]
[[Category:Animated Green Lantern films]]
[[Category:Animated Superman films]]
[[Category:Animated Flash (comics) films]]
[[Category:Animated Wonder Woman films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
{{film-stub}}</text>
      <sha1>rh8gsjwug7c3jhg27ohnwbqlwk2vyhm</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Horton Hears a Who! (TV special)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>189469</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964959</id>
      <parentid>3962031</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:21:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964959</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3178" sha1="isn435p5w23n3ldp0hrfhkg9v4jybqj" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Horton Hears a Who! (TV special)|Horton Hears a Who!]]''''' is a 1970 television half-hour-long special based on the [[Dr. Seuss]] book of the same name, ''[[w:Horton Hears a Who!|Horton Hears a Who!]]''. It was produced and directed by [[w:Chuck Jones|Chuck Jones]] - who previously produced the Seuss special [[w:MGM Television|MGM Television]] and first broadcast March 19, 1970 on [[w:CBS|CBS]].

== Horton ==
* '''A person's a person, no matter how small.'''

== Dialogue ==
:'''Horton''': But, this is incredible. What are you, anyhow?
:'''Dr. Hoovey''': Not 'what', sir. I'm a Who.
:'''Horton''': A Who? You're a Who?
:'''Dr. Hoovey''': Yes, a Who. Uh, W-H-O. Who. I live here in Who-ville.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[while Horton's clover is being carried away by Whizzer McWoff]''
:'''Horton''': Dr. Hoovey? Dr. Hoovey, fasten your seat belt! Tie yourself down! Batten your hatches! Sandbag the whole town!
:'''Dr. Hoovey''': Batten our hatches? I don't understand! What is a seat belt? We're fresh out of sand.
:'''Horton''': Please grab hold! Hold tight! Or you'll all go kaput!
:'''Dr. Hoovey''': Good gracious, good heavens! More trouble afoot!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tho Whos''': ''[singing to Dr. Hoovey, who they now believe after they have been dropped from the sky]'' Just tell us what we have to do!&lt;br /&gt;Just tell us and we'll follow you! We'll save this town, we'll save this world!&lt;br /&gt;Just tell us what we have to do!
:'''Dr. Hoovey''': ''[spoken]'' What to do? I wish I knew!
:'''Horton''': Keep up your courage now! Never let it sink! Things are getting better! Much better! ''[brief pause]'' I think...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Horton''': ''[after attempting to get the Whos to make themselves heard, which fails]'' Uh, you should've heard ''that'', just as clear as a bell. Everything is going to be... perfectly swell.
:'''Jane Kangaroo''': Hmph, I heard nothing, and ''you'' didn't either, and as for my prodigy, ''he'' didn't...
:'''Junior Kangaroo''': ...Neither!

==Voice cast==
* [[w:Hans Conried|Hans Conried]] - [[w:Horton the Elephant|Horton the Elephant]] / Dr. H. Hoovey / Narrator
* [[w:Chuck Jones|Chuck Jones]] - Junior Kangaroo / Vlad Vladikoff (renamed &quot;Whizzer McKwoff&quot;) / JoJo
* [[w:June Foray|June Foray]] - Jane Kangaroo / the Birds
* [[w:The Mellomen|The Mellomen]] - The Wickersham Brothers
* The MGM Chorus - The Citizens of Whoville

== See also ==
* ''[[Horton Hatches the Egg (film)]]'' (1942 film)
* ''[[Horton Hears a Who! (film)]]'' (2008 film)
* [[Dr. Seuss]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia|Horton Hears a Who! (TV special)}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0198545|title=Horton Hears a Who!}}

{{Dr. Seuss}}

[[Category:1970 animated films]]
[[Category:1970 American animated films]]
[[Category:1970s American animated films]]
[[Category:Film stubs]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on children's books]]
[[Category:Animated TV specials]]
[[Category:Children's animated adventure short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Chuck Jones]]
[[Category:Chuck Jones films]]</text>
      <sha1>isn435p5w23n3ldp0hrfhkg9v4jybqj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Lorax (TV special)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>189480</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964961</id>
      <parentid>3961890</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:22:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964961</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9843" sha1="2bhvhm0qrfu1f8xucus28uuglq11wpo" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:The Lorax (TV special)|The Lorax]]''''' is a 1972 animated musical television special produced by [[w:DePatie-Freleng Enterprises|DePatie-Freleng Enterprises]]. It first aired on [[w:CBS|CBS]] on February 14, 1972 (Valentine's Day) based on the book of the same name by [[Dr. Seuss]].

== The Lorax ==
* I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees.

* ''[as suburbs suddenly spring up around him]''&lt;br/&gt;They say I'm old-fashioned, and live in the past. But sometimes I think progress progresses too fast!&lt;br/&gt;''[suddenly panicked, he turns around and runs away before the houses close in around him. He finds a hotel called &quot;Ye Once-ler's Arms&quot; and runs inside through the front door. Then he runs up the outdoor staircase into a conveniently-popping-up &quot;Annex&quot; building, and then onward up that outdoor staircase into &quot;Ye Annex-Annex,&quot; which pops up so he can enter. He disappears for a second, but then he finally emerges out the back door onto the street and stops to take a look around]''

== The Once-ler ==
* Those trees! Those trees! Those Truffula trees! All my life I'd been searching for trees such as these! The touch of their tufts was much softer than silk, and they had the sweet smell of fresh butterfly milk. I felt a great leaping of love in my heart! I knew just what I'd do. I unloaded my cart. In no time at all, I had built a small shop. Then, I chopped down a Truffula tree with one chop!

* Now I'd reached the stage where the potential was known. This business was too big for one Once-ler alone, so, promptly, I built me a Radio-Phone. I called my brothers and uncles and aunts and I said, &quot;Listen here! Here's a wonderful chance for the whole Once-ler family to get mighty rich! Get over here fast. Take the road to North Nitch, turn left at Weehawken, sharp right at South Stitch!&quot;

* Every once in a while, I sit down with myself asking: ''&quot;Once-ler, why are you a Once-ler?&quot;'' And I cringe, I don't smile, as I sit there on trial asking: ''&quot;Aren't you ashamed, you old Once-ler? You ought to be locked in a hoosegow, you should! The things that you do are completely un-good!&quot;'' Yeah? But if I didn't do them, then someone else WOULD! ''&quot;That's a very good point, Mr. Once-ler.&quot;'' Progress is progress, and progress must grow!

== Dialogue ==
:'''Narrator''': What was the Lorax? And why was it there? And why was it lifted and taken somewhere from the far end of town where the Grickle-grass grows? The old Once-ler still lives here. Ask him. He knows. You won't see the Once-ler. Don't knock at his door. He lurks in his Lerkim on top of his store. And on grickly midnights in August, he peeks out of the shutters, and sometimes he speaks, and tells how the Lorax was lifted away.
:'''The Once-ler''': ''[to the boy]'' It all started way back; such a long, long time back... Way back in the days when the grass was still green, and the pond was still wet, and the clouds were still clean, and the song of the Swomee-Swans rang out in space. One morning, I came to this glorious place. Then I saw the trees! The Truffula trees! The bright-colored tufts of the Truffula trees, mile after mile in the fresh morning breeze. And under the trees, I saw Brown Bar-ba-loots, frisking about in their Bar-ba-loot suits.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Once-ler''': What you doing in my tree stump, buddy? 
:'''The Lorax''': ''Your'' tree stump? ''YOUR'' TREE STUMP?! Mister, I am the Lorax! I speak for the-- 
:'''The Once-ler''': Forget it, hmph. I don't really need the stump. You can have it, little fellow. 
:''[The Lorax gathers the Truffula tree tufts as he walks to the Once-ler's store, then the latter snatches them]''
:'''The Once-ler''': Aha! Just enough to finish the cuffs. ''[beat]'' A thing of beauty is a joy forever. Now, um, uh, who'd you say you were, little fella?
:'''The Lorax''': Mister, I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees. I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues. And I'm asking you, sir, at the top of my lungs — that thing! ''That horrible thing that I see!'' What's that ''thing'' you've made out of my Truffula tree?
:'''The Once-ler''': Look, Lorax, calm down. There's no cause for alarm. I chopped down just one tree, I'm doing no harm. Ha, this thing is most useful! This thing is a &quot;Thneed.&quot; A Thneed, a fine something-that-all-people-need! It's a shirt. It's a sock. It's a glove! It's a hat! But it has other uses, yes, far beyond that. You can use it for carpets, for pillows, for sheets, or curtains! Or covers for bicycle seats!
:'''The Lorax''': Sir, you're crazy. You're crazy with greed. Why, there's no one on Earth who would buy that fool Thneed!
:''[a man drives by, buys the Thneed and pays the Once-ler]''
:'''The Once-ler''': The birth of an industry, you poor, stupid guy! ''You'' telling ''me'' what the public will buy?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Lorax''': I speak for the trees! Let 'em grow! Let 'em grow! ''[moments later, machines with electric shavers shave away the stumps and grass, including the one he's standing on]'' But nobody listens too much, dont'cha know? I speak for the trees, and I'll yell and I'll shout for the fine things on Earth that are on their way out! ''[a line of grass shavers moves towards him, and he jumps onto one, runs across it, and jumps off the other side onto a wide-open brown field. As the grass shavers move away from the Lorax, suburbs suddenly spring up around him]'' They say I'm old-fashioned, and live in the past. But sometimes I think progress progresses too fast! ''[suddenly panicked, he turns around and runs away before the houses close in around him. He finds a hotel called &quot;Ye Once-ler's Arms&quot; and runs inside through the front door. Then he runs up the outdoor staircase into a conveniently-popping-up &quot;Annex&quot; building, and then onward up that outdoor staircase into &quot;Ye Annex-Annex&quot;, which pops up so he can enter. He disappears for a second, but then he finally emerges out the back door onto the street and stops to take a look around. From the upstairs rooms, several pieces of trash fall on him from above]'' They say I'm a fool to oppose things like these, but I'm going to continue to speak for the trees! ''[as he shouts, a machine scoops him up with a Truffula tree and dumps him into a van bound for the Thneed Factory]'' I'm going to continue to speak for the trees! ''[while the van drives closer to the Thneed factory]'' I'M GOING TO CONTINUE TO SPEAK FOR THE TREES!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Once-ler''': And at that very moment, we heard a loud whack! ''[A chopping sound is heard]'' From outside in the fields came the sickening smack of an axe on a tree! ''[The tree suddenly shakes and falls down]'' Then we saw the tree fall. ''The very last Truffula tree of them all!'' No more trees. ''[Inside the factory, the Thneed-making machinery slows to a stop]'' No more Thneeds. No more work to be done. And in no time, my uncles and aunts, everyone, all waved me goodbye. They jumped into their cars and drove away... under smoke-smuggered stars.
:'''Once-lers''': ''[sung]'' For he's a jolly good Once-ler,&lt;br/&gt;Aren't we all?&lt;br/&gt;For he's a jolly good Once-ler,&lt;br/&gt;Aren't... we... all.
:'''The Once-ler''': Now all that was left 'neath the bad-smelling sky was my big empty factory... the Lorax... and I. The Lorax said nothing. Just gave me a glance. Just gave me a very sad, sad backward glance... as he lifted himself by the seat of his pants, and I'll-- I'll never forget the grim look on his face when he heisted himself and took leave of this place, through a hole in the smog without leaving a trace! And all that the Lorax left here in this mess was a small pile of rocks, with one word.
:'''Boy''': ''[reading it]'' &quot;UNLESS?&quot;
:'''The Once-ler''': Yes. &quot;UNLESS.&quot;
:'''Boy''': What's an UNLESS?
:'''The Once-ler''': ''[sung]'' Just a faraway word,&lt;br/&gt;Just a faraway thought...
:'''Boy''': A thought... about what? About something I ought?
:'''The Once-ler''': Well... ''[sung]'' A thought about something that somebody ought,&lt;br/&gt;A thought about something... that somebody... ought.&lt;br/&gt;''[spoken]'' &quot;UNLESS someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing's going to get better. It's not.&quot;
:''[the boy starts to walk away after hearing the Once-ler's story]''
:'''The Once-ler''': ''[to himself]'' Hold on a minute... where is it, now? ''[to the boy]'' Don't go! Don't go! I've got something for you!
:''[the boy stops]''
:'''The Once-ler''': Ah, here it is! It's a Truffula seed. It's the last one of all. Catch it, don't muff!
:''[he drops the seed, and the boy catches it]''
:'''The Once-ler''': You're in charge of the last of the Truffula seeds. And Truffula trees are what everyone needs. Plant a new Truffula. Treat it with care. Give it clean water, and feed it fresh air. Grow a forest. Protect it from axes that hack. Then the Lorax and all of his friends may... come back. ''[he closes the shutters. The boy walks off with the seed in his hands]''

== Cast ==
* [[w:Eddie Albert|Eddie Albert]] - Narrator
* [[w:Bob Holt|Bob Holt]] - The Lorax / The Once-ler
* Athena Lorde - Miss O'Schmunsler
* Harlen Carraher - Boy

== See also ==
* ''[[The Lorax (film)]]'' (2012 film)
* [[Dr. Seuss]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia|The Lorax (TV special)}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0213065|title=The Lorax}}

{{Dr. Seuss}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Lorax, The (TV special)}}
[[Category:1972 animated films]]
[[Category:1972 American animated films]]
[[Category:1970s American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated musical short films]]
[[Category:Animated TV specials]]
[[Category:Animated films based on children's books]]
[[Category:Films directed by Hawley Pratt]]</text>
      <sha1>2bhvhm0qrfu1f8xucus28uuglq11wpo</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Dr. Seuss on the Loose</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>189482</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964957</id>
      <parentid>3961857</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:20:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964957</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="12905" sha1="4p6hp63gi8z003zvlszmxgyhft4sxtk" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Dr. Seuss on the Loose|Dr. Seuss on the Loose]]''''' (titled '''''Green Eggs and Ham and Other Stories''''' for the sing-a-long videocasette release and the Deluxe edition releases) is an animated musical television special, first airing on [[w:CBS|CBS]] on October 15, 1973, and hosted by [[w:The Cat in the Hat|The Cat in the Hat]] who appears in bridging sequences where he introduced animated adaptations of [[Dr. Seuss]] children's stories ''[[w:The Sneetches|The Sneetches]]'', ''[[w:The Zax|The Zax]]'', and ''[[w:Green Eggs and Ham|Green Eggs and Ham]]''. 

==''The Sneetches''==
:'''Cat in the Hat''': ''[singing]'' Oh, at the edge of each ocean,&lt;br/&gt;You'll always find beaches.&lt;br/&gt;Beautiful, glorious, florious beaches.&lt;br/&gt;And when I meander&lt;br/&gt;On peacefulish beaches,&lt;br/&gt;I frequently find myself... thinking of... &quot;Sneetches&quot;!
:'''Sneetch Choir''': ''[singing]'' Snee... Snee... Did you say &quot;Sneetches&quot;?
''[the Cat takes his umbrella and writes the title, '''&quot;the Sneetches&quot;''' in the sand with the tip of it]''
:'''Cat in the Hat''': ''[singing]'' Yes! S-N, double-E, T-C-H-E-S, Sneetches.
:'''Sneetch Choir''': ''[singing]'' Oh, S-N, double-E, T-C-H-E-S, Sneetches!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': Now the Star-Bellied Sneetches had bellies with stars. But the Plain-Bellied Sneetches had none upon thars. No stars on their bellies, no stars upon thars. Now those stars weren't so big. They were really quite small. You would think such a thing wouldn't matter at all. But, because they had stars, all the Star-Belly Sneetches would brag...
:'''Star-Bellied Sneetches''': We're the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches!
:'''Narrator''': With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they'd snort. They'd have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort.
:'''Star-Bellied Mom''': Ronald, remember: When you are out walking, you walk past a Sneetch of that type without talking. Keep your snoot in the air, and remember to snort. We have no truck whatever with the Plain-Bellied sort!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sylvester McMonkey McBean''': My friends, I have seen they've been treating you mean. My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. I know precisely why you're so unhappy, and that I can fix. I'm the Fix-it-Up Chappie. ''[He pushes on a lever, setting up his Star-On Machine]'' My prices are low. And I work with great speed. And my work is 100% guaranteed.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sneetch Choir''': ''[singing]'' Them over there, they got stars upon thars,&lt;br/&gt;And we over here, we got stars upon ours.&lt;br/&gt;We got 'em also,&lt;br/&gt;we got 'em too.&lt;br/&gt;We're every little bitty-bit&lt;br/&gt;as goody-good as you.&lt;br/&gt;Now we're socially acceptable&lt;br/&gt;at marshmallow toasts;&lt;br/&gt;You'll have to send us invitations&lt;br/&gt;to your frankfurter roasts!&lt;br/&gt;Stars! Stars!&lt;br/&gt;Bless our lucky stars!&lt;br/&gt;All the Sneetches...&lt;br/&gt;On the beaches...&lt;br/&gt;Now've got stars upon thars!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Narrator''': Then of course, from then on, as you probably guessed, things really got into a horrible mess. All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches, the Fix-it-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches. Off again! On again! In again! Out again! Through the machines they raced round and about again, changing their stars every minute or two. They kept paying money. ''[speaking really fast:]'' They kept running through until neither the Plain nor the Star-Bellies knew whether this one was that one or that one was this one or which one was what one! ''[speaking more calmly:]'' ...Or what one was who. Then, when every last cent of their money was spent, the Fix-it-Up Chap packed up! And he went! And he laughed as he drove his car up the beach...
:'''Sylvester McMonkey McBean''': Ha-ha! They never will learn. No, you can't teach a Sneetch.
:'''Narrator''': But McBean was quite wrong! I am happy to say that the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day. That day, they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches, and no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches. That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars, and whether they had one, or not, upon thars.

==''The Zax''==
:'''Cat in the Hat''': ''[singing]'' Oh, beyond the last mountain,&lt;br/&gt;the very last mountain,&lt;br/&gt;beyond the last Zinniga-Zanniga tree,&lt;br/&gt;beyond the last '''whoomph''' bush,&lt;br/&gt;the very last '''whoomph''' bush,&lt;br/&gt;there is a vaculous, vacant prairie...&lt;br/&gt;The Prairie of Prax,&lt;br/&gt;and the tale of '''''The Zax.'''''
:'''Narrator''': One day, making tracks in the Prairie of Prax, came a North-going Zax. A North-going Zax... and a South-going Zax. A North-going Zax... and a South-going Zax. And it happened that both of them came to a place where they bumped! ''[They bump into each other]'' There they stood, foot to foot, face to face.
:'''North-going Zax''': Look here now!
:'''Narrator''': ...the North-going Zax said.
:'''North-going Zax''': I say! You are blocking my path, you are right in my way! I'm a North-going Zax, and I always go north. Get out of my way, now, and let me go forth!
:'''South-going Zax''': Who's in whose way?
:'''Narrator''': ...snapped the South-going Zax.
:'''South-going Zax''': I always go south, making South-going tracks. So you're in MY way! And I ask you to move and let me go south in my South-going groove.
:'''Narrator''': Then the North-going Zax said, with North-going pride...
:'''North-going Zax''': I never have taken a step to one side, and I'll prove to you that I won't change my ways if I have to keep standing here 59 days!
:'''South-going Zax''': And I'll prove to YOU...
:'''Narrator''': ...yelled the South-going Zax.
:'''South-going Zax''': ...that I can stand here in the Prairie of Prax for 59 years! For I live by a rule that I learned as a boy back in South-going school: &quot;Never budge!&quot; That's my rule. &quot;Never budge in the least -- not an inch to the west, not an inch to the east!&quot; I'll stay here not budging, I can and I will if it makes you and me and the whole WORLD stand still!
:''[day turns to night, then turns back to daytime, then turns windy, then rainy, then snowy, then springtime, and finally a prairie with a highway]''
:'''Narrator''': Well, of course, the world didn't stand still. The world grew. In a couple of years, the new highway came through, and they built it right over those two stubborn Zax, and left them there, standing un-budged in their tracks.

==''Green Eggs and Ham''==
:'''Cat in the Hat''': ''[singing]'' Oh, I frequently think&lt;br/&gt;every now and then&lt;br/&gt;of the glorious fruit&lt;br/&gt;of the noble hen&lt;br/&gt;Eggs, eggs, E, double-G, S-eggs&lt;br/&gt;My knowledge of eggs&lt;br/&gt;is tremendously wide&lt;br/&gt;I've eaten them boiled,&lt;br/&gt;I've eaten them fried&lt;br/&gt;Poached and shirred&lt;br/&gt;and deviled and scrambled&lt;br/&gt;Omelets, shmomelets,&lt;br/&gt;cobbled, and frammeled&lt;br/&gt;I've eaten them beaten&lt;br/&gt;and swizzled and swuzzled&lt;br/&gt;Frizzled, cadizzled, bamboozled, and fuzzled&lt;br/&gt;I know every way&lt;br/&gt;that an egg can be guzzled&lt;br/&gt;And thinking of eggs&lt;br/&gt;reminds me of Sam&lt;br/&gt;Whose favorite dish&lt;br/&gt;Is &quot;'''''Green eggs and ham.'''''&quot;
:''[Opens to see Guy-Am-I reading a newspaper. He hears dog bells and a dog barking'']
:'''Sam-I-Am''': I am Sam! ''[leaves with the dog and comes back with a tiger]'' Sam, I am!
:'''Guy''': That Sam-I-Am! That Sam-I-Am! I do not like that Sam-I-Am!
:'''Sam''': Do you like green eggs and ham?
:'''Guy''': I do not like them, Sam-I-Am. I do not like green eggs and ham.
:'''Choir''': ''[singing]'' He does not like them, Sam-I-Am. He doesn't like, he doesn't like green eggs and ham.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sam''': Would you like them in a house? ''[A mouse joins in with him.]'' Would you like them with a mouse?
:'''Guy''': I would not like them in a house! ''[slams the door on Sam, raises his fist]'' I would not like them with a mouse! I would not eat them here or there! I would not like them anywhere! ''[runs off]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sam''': Would you eat them in a box? Would you eat them with a fox?
:'''Guy''': ''[scoffs]'' No, not in a box, not with a fox!
:''[Trumpet sounds are heard. The fox shrieks and runs off. A couple of dogs and horses run by to chase after the fox.]''
:'''Guy''': Not in a house, not with a mouse! I would not eat them here or there, I would not eat them anywhere!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sam has driven the car up a tree]''
:'''Sam''': You may like them, you will see. You may like them in a tree.
:'''Guy''': I would not, could not in a tree! Not in a car! Now, let me be! '' [They suddenly hear a chugging sound. As a train passes by below, he jumps out of the tree and onto the back carriage.]'' Not in a box! Not with a fox! Not in a house! Not with a mouse! I would not like them here or there! I would not like them anywhere! I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am! ''[The train travels away offscreen]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%/&gt;
:''[On the train, Guy is looking at a menu, but Sam appears with the green eggs and ham]''
:'''Sam''': Could you, would you, on a train?
:'''Guy''': No, not on a train! Not in a tree! Not in a car! Sam, let me be! ''[He gets ready to leave as he opens the door]'' Not in a box, not with a fox! ''[The fox appears on the train, with the hound dogs and men on horses chasing him]'' Not with a mouse, not in a house! Not here or there, not anywhere! ''[He slams the door and sits down while the train moves, until it goes into a dark tunnel]''
:'''Sam''': In the dark, here in the dark? Would you, could you, in the dark?
:'''Guy''': Oooh, I would not, could not in the dark!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sam''': ''[With a goat on the railroad tracks]'' Would you, could you with a goat?
:'''Guy''': I would not, could not, with a goat! I will not eat them here or there, I would not eat them anywhere!
:''[Guy rides away on a handcar and lands in the hull of a ship. He climbs up out of the hull, panting. He dusts himself. He goes to the railing of the ship. He looks on the side, only to see Sam on a rowboat]''
:'''Sam''': Would you, could you on a boat?
:'''Guy''': ''[cries and groans in frustration]'' I would not, would not on a boat! ''[repeatedly banging on the railing angrily]'' I will not, will not with a goat! Not in the rain, not on a train! ''[He hears an offscreen oncoming train. He turns and sees the train coming down the track. The train crashes an effort to jump the chasm left on the ship, bringing it down into the ocean with it. After the train/shipwreck, Guy emerges from the water and pants. He takes off his hat. Water falls out all over his head. He puts his hat back on and goes over to a treasure chest. It opens and Sam comes out]''
:'''Sam''': You do not like them, so you say. Try them. Try them and you may. Try them and you may, I say.
:'''Guy''': Sam, if you would let me be, I will try them, and you will see. ''[He took a deep breath and sighs with tearfully to forgiveness smiled for one green egg with the fork. He covers his eyes with his hand as he takes a bite from one green egg, finally calms down by comforting smiles and laughs after eating it]'' Say! ''[Eats more green eggs]'' I like green eggs and ham! I do! I like them, Sam-I-Am! ''[Singing, laugh and celebrating with joy]'' And I would eat them in a boat! And I would eat them with a goat! And I will eat them in the rain! And in the dark and on a train! And in a car and in a tree! They are so good! So good You're our biggest, bestest friend, you see! So I will eat them in a box! And I will eat them with a fox... ''[The cavalry bugle blares as the fox runs into view]''
:'''Fox''': ''[Singing]'' He will eat them in a box! And he will eat them with a fox!
:''[The dogs from the cavalry come in and sing, along with the mouse and goat cheered and dance happily to the music.]''
:'''All''': And he will eat them in a house! And he will eat them with a mouse! And he will eat them here or there! 
:''[Sam and Guy exchange warm smiles]''
:'''Everyone''': [celebrating] Say, he will eat them ANYWHERE!
:'''Guy''': I do so like green eggs and ham. Thank you. Thank you, Sam-I-Am.

==Voice cast==
* [[Allan Sherman]] - The Cat in the Hat 
* [[w:Hans Conried|Hans Conried]] - Narrator / North-going Zax / South-going Zax / Fox
* [[w:Paul Winchell|Paul Winchell]] - Sneetches / Sam-I-Am / Guy-Am-I
* [[w:Bob Holt|Bob Holt]] - Sneetches / Sylvester McMonkey McBean
* The [[w:Ron Hicklin Singers|Ron Hicklin Singers]] - Sneetches (singing voices)

==See also==
* [[Dr. Seuss]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia|Dr. Seuss on the Loose}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0134628|title=Dr. Seuss on the Loose}}

{{Dr. Seuss}}

[[Category:1973 animated films]]
[[Category:1973 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Animated TV specials]]
[[Category:Package films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on children's books]]
[[Category:Films directed by Hawley Pratt]]</text>
      <sha1>4p6hp63gi8z003zvlszmxgyhft4sxtk</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Trolls (film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>192042</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965226</id>
      <parentid>3961748</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:10:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-38643-43</username>
        <id>3348122</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965226</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="37835" sha1="gyb11ly67mtqfqt9ebu4zmq76oyi708" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Trolls - Alternative Logo.svg|thumb|It’s inside you! It’s inside of all of us! And I don’t think it. I feel it!]]
'''''[[w:Trolls (film)|Trolls]]''''' is a 2016 American animated  [[w:Jukebox musical|jukebox musical]] [[w:Comedy film|comedy film]] based on the dolls of the same name created by [[w:Thomas Dam|Thomas Dam]]. The film revolves around two trolls on a quest to save their village from destruction by the Bergens, humanoids who devour trolls.

Produced as the 33rd animated feature by [[w:DreamWorks Animation|DreamWorks Animation]] and distributed by [[w:20th Century Fox|20th Century Fox]], the film debuted on October 8, 2016 at the BFI London Film Festival, and was released in the United States on November 4, 2016.

:''Directed by [[w:Mike Mitchell (director)|Mike Mitchell]] and [[w:Walt Dohrn|Walt Dohrn]]. Written by [[w:Jonathan Aibel and Glenn Berger|Jonathan Aibel, Glenn Berger]] and Erica Rivinoja.''

==Dialogue==
:'''Creek''': Whoa, whoa. ''[seems to levitate]'' Easy, Branch. Easy. ''[the camera zooms out, revealing that he is simply being carried by a beetle-like insect. Creek turns around and puts the insect's face to his forehead]'' Thank you for providing safe passage, brother. ''[the insect flies away and Creek puts both hands together]'' Namaste. ''[turns to Branch]'' Okay, first of all, mate, thanks for sharing your unique perspective on things.  ''[mockingly]'' Again. ''[Biggie and Cooper hold back their laughter]'' But, just for now, why don't you try on some positivity, eh? A little positivity might go with that vest. 
:'''Branch''': ''[sarcastically]'' Okay, fine. I'm positive you all are going to get eaten.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[Poppy puts a picture of Creek and she expands the pictures of her friends, then expands the tall picture of Cooper]''
:'''Poppy''': So special. Good night, Cooper. Good night, Smidge. Good night, Fuzzbert. Good night, Satin. Good night, Chenille. Good night, Biggie. Good night, DJ. Good night, Guy Diamond... ''[chuckles]'' Good night, Creek. ''[Taps the picture]'' Boop.
:'''Branch''': ''[with envy]'' And good night, Poppy.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[While the Bergens are looking for the trolls]''
:'''Prince Gristle''': Daddy, where are they?
:'''King Gristle Sr.''': ''[to Chef with angry] Don't just stand there! Make my son HAPPY!
:'''Chef Bergen''': He will be &lt;big&gt;'''HAPPY!'''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Poppy''': Satin, Chenille, sharp right!
:'''Chenille''': Let is do it!
:'''Satin''': Whoop!
:'''Poppy''': Guy Diamond, glitter him!
:'''Guy Diamond''': ''[autotune] Eat glitter! HAHA!''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[Poppy looks at the sky and her flower bracelet dings, meaning it's Hug Time. She looks at the bracelet, sits up, and looks at Branch, wanting to hug him]''
:'''Branch''': Don't even think about it.
:''[Poppy's flower bracelet shuts down, then mumbles and looks at the starry sky.]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[singing] Stars shining bright above you.''
:'''Branch''': ''[sits up]'' Really? Seriously? More singing?
:'''Poppy''': Yes, seriously! Singing helps me relax. Maybe you oughta try it.
:'''Branch''': I don't sing, and I don't relax. This is the way I am, and I like it. I also like a little silence!
:''[mandolin playing]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[singing]'' Hello darkness my old friend, I have come to talk with you again...''
:'''Spider''': Hello.
:'''Poppy''': ''[continues singing]'' Because a vision softly creeping... Left its seeds while I was sleeping... And the vision that was planted in my brain, still remains. Within the sound... of silence.
:'''Branch''': May I? ''[she gives him the mandolin, and he tosses it into the fireplace, then gets back into his sleeping bag]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[That night at Bergen Town]''
:'''King Gristle Sr.''': ''[off-screen]'' That's right! Take her away! ''[The Bergens take her away]'' Get her out of my sight! ''[on-screen]'' She is hereby banished from Bergen Town forever!
:'''Chef Bergen''': We can all be happy again. I'll find the Trolls! ''[The Bergens kick her out]'' And shove them down your ungrateful throats.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:''[Poppy and Branch are still walking to make it at Bergen Town]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[scatting]''
:'''Branch''': Do you have to sing?
:'''Poppy''': I always sing when I'm in a good mood.
:'''Branch''': Do you have to be in a good mood?
:'''Poppy''': Why wouldn't I be? By this time tomorrow, I'll be with all my friends. Ohh! I wonder what they're all doing right now.
:'''Branch''': Probably being digested.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Branch''': I don't do high fives.
:'''Cloud Guy''': Slap it, boss.
:'''Branch''': Not gonna happen.
:'''Cloud Guy''': Party on the top floor.
:'''Branch''': Nope.
:'''Cloud Guy''': Little slappy? Make Daddy happy?
:'''Branch''': That's weird.
:'''Cloud Guy''': Come on, just one little high five!
:'''Branch''': Oh, no thanks, I'm good.
:'''Cloud Guy''': Look, just do this but with YOUR hand. ''[slaps his hand]''
:'''Branch''': Thank you for the demonstration. Really cleared up exactly what I will NOT be doing.
:'''Poppy''': Branch! It's a high 5! The others lead to certain DEATH! Get perspective!
:''[pause]''
:'''Branch''': ''[growls under his breath]'' One high five and then you'll tell us which tunnel to take, right?
:'''Cloud Guy''': So easy...
:'''Branch''': ''[growls]'' Okay, fine! ''[tries to slap Cloud Guy's hand]
:'''Cloud Guy''': ''[pulls his hand away]'' Whoop! Too slow!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Poppy''': They're alive, Branch, I know it!
:'''Branch''': You don't know anything, Poppy. And I cannot wait to see the look on your face when you realize the world isn't all cupcakes and rainbows. Cause it isn't. Bad things happen, and there is nothing you can do about it.
:'''Poppy''': Hey, I know it is not all cupcakes and rainbows, but I did rather go through life thinking that it mostly is instead of being like YOU. You don't sing; you don't dance...so gray all the time! What happened to you--
:'''Branch''': ''[puts a finger to her mouth]'' Shh!
:'''Poppy''': ''[whispering]'' A Bergen?
:'''Branch''': ''[whispering]'' Maybe. ''[walks ahead a little]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[stays where she is, looking around carefully, then realizes--]'' There is no Bergen, is there? You just said that, so I'd stop talking!
:'''Branch''': ''[still whispering]'' Maybe.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Cloud Guy''': I'm going to let you slide with a fist bump.
:''[as Branch goes to fist bump Cloud Guy starts doing all kinds of weird movements with his hand]''
:'''Cloud Guy''': [[w:Shark|Shark attack]]! Nom-nom-nom-nom. [[w:Jellyfish|Jellyfish]], hand [[w:Sandwich|sandwich]], [[w:Turkey (bird)|turkey]], [[w:Snowman|snowman]], [[w:Dolphin|dolphin]], [[w:Helicopter|helicopter]], [[w:Last Supper|last supper]], [[w:Monkey|monkey]] in a zoo.
:'''Branch''': What?
:'''Cloud Guy''': ''[covers Branch is fist with his hand]'' Gearshift. ''[starts to pretend to be a car and change gears with Branch’s fist; then starts laughing. Poppy laughs as well,  but Branch glares at her and she stops laughing]'' Okay, okay, okay. Now I'm thinking we hug. ''[in anger, Branch breaks a stick in half, Cloud Guy is body suddenly has thunder and lightning and starts to rain]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Guy Diamond''': Oh, boy.
:'''Cooper''': Here we go again.
:'''Biggie''': Oh, Branch.
:'''Satin''': You always ruin everything.
:'''Chenille''': Warning us about the Bergens.
:'''Branch''': No, I don't. ''[Flashback; during a birthday party when Branch had run in screaming]'' THE BERGENS ARE COMING!!! ''[pushes the birthday cake over and runs off]'' AAAHH!!! ''[During a wedding ceremony when he had run in screaming]'' THE BERGENS ARE COMING!!! ''[pushes the wedding cake over and runs off]'' AAAHH!!! ''[During a funeral when Branch had run in as well]'' THE BERGENS ARE COMING!!! ''[pushes the coffin over (instead of the funeral cake) and runs off]'' AAAHH!!! ''[Back at the present moment]''
:'''Poppy''': Come on, we haven't seen a Bergen in twenty years. They're not going to find us!
:'''Branch''': No, they're not going to find me, because I will be in my highly camouflaged... heavily fortified, Bergen-proof survival bunker.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Branch''': ''[gets surprised after finding Creek alive in Prince Gristle's amulet]'' Creek?
:'''Poppy''': I knew he was alive.
:'''Biggie''': ''[to Mr. Dinkles]'' Mr. Dinkles, he is alive!
:'''Mr. Dinkles''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, snap.
:''[The trolls gasp in shock]''
:'''Biggie''': You just talked? ''[Mr. Dinkles beeps]''
&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Prince Gristle''': I love it! ''[Applause from Bibbly, Chad, and Todd]''
:'''Bridget''': I think you look fat.
:'''Prince Gristle''': What?! ''[They stare at Bridget]''
:'''Poppy''': &quot;P-H phat&quot;. Then strike that pose!
:'''Prince Gristle''': Hot lunch! Total Honesty from a total babe. ''[Holds Bridget's hand]'' And who might you be?
:'''Poppy''': Your name is, uh...um, uh...
:'''Biggie''': Lady!
:'''Guy Diamond''': Glitter?
:'''Smidge''': Sparkles!
:'''Branch''': Seriously?
:'''Bridget''': My name is Lady Glittersparkles. Seriously.
:'''Prince Gristle''': Well, my Lady Glittersparkles, would you care to join for an evening at Captain Starfunkle's Roller Rink and Arcade?
:'''Bridget''': Would I! ''[to Poppy]'' Would I?
:'''Poppy''': Yes! You did be delighted.
:'''Bridget''': Yes! You did be delighted.
:'''Prince Gristle''': Oh! Indeed, I would!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Satin, Chenille''': It is going to be the biggest...
:'''DJ Suki''': The loudest!
:'''Cooper''': The craziest party ever!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt; 
:'''Poppy''': Branch! Branch! Branch! Branch, are you in there? Huh?
:'''Branch''': I'm not going to your party.
:'''Poppy''': The party's over. We just got attacked by a Bergen!
:'''Branch''': I knew it!
:'''Poppy''': It took Cooper, and Smidge, and Fuzzbert, and Satin and Chenille and Biggie, and Guy Diamond... and Creek!
:'''Branch''': ''[rolls his eyes and shrugs]'' Eh.
:'''Poppy''': Which is why I have to ask you... will you go to Bergen Town with me and save everyone?
:'''Branch''': What? No
:'''Poppy''': Branch, you can't say no! They're your friends!
:'''Branch''': Ah-ah-ah, they're YOUR friends...  I'm staying right here in my bunker where it's safe.''[he turns around, crossing his arms]''                   :'''Poppy''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, that's great. You're the one guy who knows more about Bergen's than anyone... but, when we finally need you, you just want to hide here forever?
:'''Branch''': Forever? ''[scoffs]'' No. ''[Branch pulls a lever that leads them down to an even bigger bunker]'' Yeah, I really only have enough supplies down here to last me ten years, eleven if I'm willing to store and drink my own sweat, which I am. You all said I was crazy, huh? Well, who's crazy now? Me, crazy prepared!
:'''Poppy''': I'm sorry. I should have listened to you. You told me not to throw the party, and I threw it anyway. And it's my fault they were taken.''[Branch puts something on the shelf]'' And now I don't know what to do. 
:'''Branch''': ''[sarcastically]'' Why don't you try scrapbooking them to freedom?
:'''Poppy''': ''[sarcastically too]'' Solid burn, Branch.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt; 
:'''Branch''': There is not a party going on right here.''[she pulls scissors from Poppy's hair and uses them to open the lock on the padlock. Gives back damaged scissors to irritated owner]'' The sooner we get you guys out of here...
:'''Poppy''': The sooner we can save Creek!
:'''Branch''': ''[annoyed]'' What?
:'''Bridget''': ''[wakes up]'' Hello? ''[Snack Pack are terrified]'' Is it me you're looking for? ''[she goes back to sleep]''
:'''Branch''': ''[in a whisper]'' I know you're looking for the cupcakes and rainbows here... ''[opens the cage door]'' But let's face it, Creek's been eaten. 
:'''Biggie''': ''[to Mr Dinkles]'' They put him in a taco!
:'''Cooper''': It was horrible.
:'''Guy Diamond''': Sorry, Poppy. Creek's gone. 
:'''Branch''': Poppy, how could you possibly think Creek's still alive?
:'''Poppy''': I don't ''think'' he's alive. I ''hope'' he's alive, and that's enough.
:'''Branch''': ''How'' do you always look on the bright side? There is no bright side here! None!
:'''Poppy''': There's ''always'' a bright side.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt; 
:'''Poppy''': So where do you think our friends are?
:'''Branch''': ''[they pass under a painting that shows the Bergen family preparing to consume dishes from Trolls: jelly, cupcakes, and tacos]'' If I had to guess, I'd say in a Bergen's stomach.
:'''Poppy''': Could you try to be positive? Just once. You might like it.
:'''Branch''': ''[sarcastically]'' Okay. I'm sure they're not only alive... But about to be delivered to us on a silver platter.
:'''Poppy''': Thank you. That wasn't so hard, was it? Branch!
:''[Branch is suprised]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''King Peppy''': No troll left behind!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt; 
:'''Smidge''': ''[repeated line]'' Oh my gah!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
: ''[Fade to black. The four eyes open and it looks at the cocooned Poppy. It is revealed to be a four-eyed monstrous spider. The other spider climb down to Poppy and begin to eat her. Then, Branch's hair expands to grab Poppy away from the spider. He glares at the monsters as the spider look at him. Branch takes a pan out of his camping bag. He throws the pan at the spider, but it didn't work. He gasps nervously as the spider ran toward him. He takes off his camping bag and expands his hair to fight the spiders. After he fights the spiders with his hair, the monster to enter a cave, after which closes. Branch looks up in shock and realizes that this is actually it the mouth of a camouflaged creature. The cave-like monster menacingly looks down at Branch. Branch gasps and monster falls back asleep. Branch sighs and looks at the cocooned Poppy]''
:'''Branch''': Oh, no. Poppy! Hang on! ''[Branch gets a stick from a tree and gets two bugs and rips the web out of Poppy. He rubs the bugs together and Poppy is heart starts to pulsate]'' 
:'''Poppy''': ♪''Get back up again!♪'' Branch, my man, you were ''right'' on time.
:'''Branch''': Oh, right, like you knew I was coming.
:'''Poppy''': Yes. I figured after the third Hug Time, getting eaten by a Bergen would not seem so bad.
:'''Branch''': And I figured there was no way you could do this by yourself. Guess we were both right.
:'''Poppy''': Hmm. All right! Let's do this! Sooner we get to Bergen Town, sooner we can rescue everybody...
&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Bridget''': Wait! Why isn't this one singing?
:'''Cooper''': Come on, Branch. Sing with us!
:'''Trolls''': Yeah, Branch, sing with us!
:'''Branch''': No. That's okay.
:'''Bridget''': You don't think this will work?
:'''Branch''': No, no. It's not that. I just don't sing.
:'''Poppy''': Branch!
:'''Bridget''': No. He's right. This idea is stupid. King Gristle will never love me. ''[starts crying]''
:'''Cooper''': Come on. Hey, hey. What's all this?
:'''Biggie''': ''[tries to comfort Bridget]'' That's right, Bridget. Just let it all out. ''[Bridget cries loudly]'' Bridget, let it go. Just have a good cry. Go, girl! Okay, now bring it back in. Reel it in.
:''[Branch climbs to the window]''
:'''Poppy''': Branch, what are you doing? You have to sing!
:'''Branch''': I told you, I don't sing.
:'''Poppy''': You have to!
:'''Branch''': I'm sorry. I can't.
:'''Poppy''': No, you can. You just won't.
:'''Branch''': Fine. I just won't.
:'''Poppy''': You have to!
:'''Branch''': No!
:'''Poppy''': Yes!
:'''Branch''': No! 
:'''Poppy''': Why NOT!? Why won't you sing?!
:'''Branch''': ''[irritated]'' Because singing killed my grandma! Okay?!  
&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Branch''': When are you gonna ask him about Creek?
:'''Poppy''': We have to warm him up first. Don't you know anything about romance?
:'''Branch''': '' [sarcastically]'' Of course! I am passionate about it.
:'''Poppy''': Really?
:'''Branch''': Don't you know anything about sarcasm?
:'''Cooper''': I think I had a sarcasm once.
:'''Prince Gristle''': And I'll take one of everything, Bibbly. Things are gonna get messy.
:'''Captain Starfunkle''': Enjoy your pizza. Here's your tokens.
:'''Bridget''': Ooh, so fancy. Good thing I brought my appetite.
:'''Prince Gristle''': You are fantastic!
:'''Poppy''': Bridget, compliment back!
:'''Bridget''': I like your back.
:'''Poppy''': No, I meant...say something nice about him.
:'''Bridget''': But I do like his back.
:'''Prince Gristle''': Huh?
:'''Bridget''': Um...
:'''Branch''': Poppy, Help her!
:'''Bridget''': Your eyes... They're... Ugh... Ooh! Your ears... Your eyes... ears... 
:'''Biggie''': Nose!
:'''Satin, Chenille''': Skin!
:'''Cooper''': Neck!
:'''Bridget''': Skin, neck, ears, nose, face, back of your head.
:'''Prince Gristle''': Are you okay?
:'''Guy Diamond''': ''[autotune]'' Your teeth.
:'''Bridget''': Teeth.
:'''Prince Gristle''': What is going on? Are you making fun of me?
:'''Bridget''': Your eyes!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Poppy''' ''[terrified]'': Branch, we have to save him!
:'''Branch''' ''[sarcastically]'': Save him from what? His stomach?
:'''Poppy''' ''[with a bit of hope]'': We didn't see him chew. We didn't see him swallow!
:'''Branch''' ''[pessimistically]'': Face it, Poppy. Sometimes people go into other people's mouths, and they DON'T come out. If we go after Creek now, we're going to get eaten. I'm sorry... But it's too late for him.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Poppy''': Okay, everybody. Let's go save Creek.
:'''Bridget''': No! No! You can't leave. Lady Glittersparkles is gonna be the king's plus one at dinner.
:'''Branch''': The dinner where they're serving Troll? Yeah, I think we're gonna have to skip that one.
:'''Bridget''': No! No, you have to help me be Lady Glittersparkles. I need you.
:'''Poppy''': You don't wanna pretend to be someone you're not forever!
:'''Bridget''': Then how about just for tomorrow?
:'''Poppy''': Bridget, you don't need us anymore. You and the king can make each other happy!
:'''Bridget''': That's impossible! Only eating a Troll can make you happy. Everyone knows that! I wish I'd never gone on this STUPID DATE! ''[sobbing]''
:'''Poppy''': Bridget.
:'''Bridget''': Just go... GET OUT OFF MY ROOM! Leave me alone!
:'''Poppy''': Please, listen.
:''[The trolls leave Bridget's room as Bridget breaks down]''
:'''Chef Bergen''': ''[to Bridget; on microphone with angry]'' '''IDGET!'''
:'''Branch''': ''[to Poppy]'' We've gotta go.
:'''Chef Bergen''': ''[on microphone with angry]'' What's going on down there? Idget, scrub that dish! The king's bringing a plus one.
:'''Bridget''': ''[sobbing]'' Yes, Chef...!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[While rescuing her friends]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[singing]'' ''♪Looking up at a sunny sky, so shiny and blue and there's a butterfly! Well, isn't that a super fantastic sign?♪'' ''[As she stops, a frog-like monster eats the butterfly, a blob-like monster eats him, a group of tiny orange moth-like monsters fly by him, leaving only the bones behind, and a purple plant-like monster breathes fire on the bones of the monster, turning it into a pile of ash which he sucks up into his mouth. He turns to menacingly look at Poppy and growls. She stares back at him.]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[singing nervously as she edges sideways]'' ''♪It is going to be a fantastic day♪'' ''[runs off]''
:''[She runs off. The next shot, we see Poppy on the puffed geysers. She goes to a geyser which makes Poppy fly.] ''♪Such marvelousness it's gonna bring Got a pocket full of songs that I'm gonna sing And I'm ready to take on anything Hooray!♪''
[The next shot, Poppy is swinging on vines which's turn out to be tangled snake-like monster, which bows his head at the sight of the princess. She sees a monster and runs off as the creature tries to eat her.] ''♪Some super fun surprise around each corner. Just riding on a rainbow I'm gonna be okay. Hey! I'm not giving up today''  [She slides down and pops back up. After she is chased by a monster, she falls and sees a bird-like monster. The monster eats her and lays an egg on the nest. Poppy shakes the egg And gets out of the egg by her foot, arm, and her whole body. She is now covered in orange slime. Chicks come by and stretch her arms. She lets go of her arms and rides on a leaf. She sees the red and white thorns. The next shot, she is seen in the paint rain ith her hair wet, a dry deserted island with her hair dry, and a snowy land with her hair covered in snow. The next shot, she is in underwater and gets absorbed by a fish-like monster. She climbs inside the monster's stomach and is now in the windy storm. The next shot, she is standing on a levitating eyeball-like creatures. She jumps on of one and jumps one eyeball and the eyeballs pops into glitter. Poppy falls on the flytrap-like monster. The monster sees Poppy and closes its mouth to devour her]'' 
:'''Poppy''': ''♪What if it's more than I can take''♪ ''[She opens the monster's mouth]'' ''♪No! I can't think that way! 'Cause I know, that I'm really, really, really gonna be okay!♪'' ''[She goes up to something that looks like a hill. But it wasn't a hill, it was only a hill-like monster. The monster opens his eyes and mouth, placing the princess on his tongue, then drops it and closes his mouth]'' ''♪Hey! I'm not giving up today. There's nothing getting in my way!♪'' ''[She expand her hair apart on the walls and she flies up and lands on a bush, before she it landed in digestive acids]'' ''♪And if you knock knock me over...I will get back up again! Oh!♪'' ''[She picks a blue berry]''
: '''Poppy''': ''♪If something goes a little wrong...♪'' ''[She eats the berry and gets blue spots all over her body]'' ''♪Well, you can go ahead and bring it on. 'Cause if you knock knock me over...♪'' ''[Her cheeks starts to swell up including her arms. She swells her whole body into a ball]'' ''♪I will get back up again♪'' ''[She rolls off. The next shot, Poppy is rolling on hills]''
'''Chorus''': ''[singing]'' ♪Get up!♪

'''Poppy''': ''[singing]'' ''♪Oh...''(She falls into spider webs and gets cocooned) ''I'm okay!♪''

'''Chorus''': ''[singing]'' ''♪Get up!♪''

'''Poppy''': ''[singing]'' ''♪Woah oh oh oh oh oh!♪''

'''Chorus''': ''[singing]'' ''♪Get up!♪''

'''Poppy''': ''[singing]'' ''♪Oh, oh...♪'' ''[She falls on the ground]'' ''♪And if you knock knock me over...you knock knock me over...♪'' ''[She gets exhausted]'' ''♪I...will...get back up again....!♪'' ''[She loses consciousness. Zoom back to her as she closes her eyes and sticks her tongue out of her mouth]'' Bleh''.''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[After hearing Creek's story]''
:'''Poppy''': ''[shocked]'' No! Creek, please do not do this.
:'''Creek''': Believe me... I wish there was some other &quot;me not getting eaten&quot; way.
:'''Chef Bergen''': But there is not.
:'''Creek''': ''[falsely]'' And now I have to live with this for the rest of my life. At least you get to die with a clear conscience. So, in a way... ''[Poppy gets more shocked]'' you could say... I am doing this for you. ''[he steals Poppy's cowbell away and touches her noise]'' Boop!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[When the trolls were trapped in the pot-like trap by the Chef and her peoples]''
:'''King Peppy''': ''[gasps]'' Poppy? ''[Poppy is turned away in depression, as King Peppy comes to hug her]'' Poppy, oh, thank goodness you are alright.
:'''Poppy''': ''[after hugged; sarcastically]'' I am doing great. I've got everyone I love thrown in a pot, thanks for asking.
:''[Branch then watches and is a bit surprised]''
:'''Biggie''': Poppy, are you being sarcastic?
:'''Poppy''': ''[furiously]'' '''YES!'''
:''[Everyone terrified gasps]''
:'''Smidge''': ''[shocked]'' Oh my gah.
:'''Poppy''': ''[remorseful, to the trolls]'' I'm sorry. I didn't know why I did think I could save you. ''[to her father King Peppy]'' All I wanted was to do is keep everyone safe like you did, Dad. ''[trying not to cry but felt saddened]'' But I couldn't...
:'''King Peppy''': ''[feeling sorry]'' Poppy...
:'''Poppy''': ''[as she sadly turns away and walks slowly to the middle of the pot-like trap]'' I let everybody down. ''[she then falls on her knees]''
:'''Branch''': ''[sighs; also feeling sorry]'' But, Poppy...
:'''Poppy''': ''[hopelessly]'' You were right, Branch. The world isn’t all cupcakes and rainbows. ''[moments later, her color begins to fade as the other Trolls watch, feeling saddened]''
:'''Biggie''': ''[sadly]'' Poppy…
:''[As Poppy's color has faded away, Guy Diamond, Cooper, Smidge, DJ Suki, Satin, Chenille, Biggie, Mr. Dinkles, Fuzzbert, King Peppy, and the rest of the other trolls also lose their colors as they lose hope. Branch watches this]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Poppy''': Thank you.
:'''Branch''': ''[warmly]''  No. Thank you.
:'''Poppy''': For what?
:'''Branch''': For showing me how to be, happy.
:'''Poppy''': Really? You're finally happy?... Now?
:'''Branch''': I think so. Happiness is inside of all of us, right? Sometimes you just need someone to help you find it.
:'''One of Troll children''': What's gonna happen now, Princess Poppy?
:'''Poppy''': I don't know. But I know we're not giving up.
 

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Poppy''': Happiness is not something you put inside, it's ''already there!'' Sometimes you just... need someone to help you find it.
:'''A Bergen''': Can I really be happy?
:'''Poppy''': Of course!
:''[Multiple Bergens start getting Poppy's message]''
:'''A Bergen''': Do you think ''I'' can be happy!
:'''Poppy''': Yes! It's inside you, it's inside of ''all'' of us! And I do not think it... I ''feel'' it
''[She starts singing I Can't Stop the Feeling]''                   ''♪I got this feeling inside my bones                        It goes electric wavy when I turn it on♪''

'''Branch''': ''♪And if you want it inside your soul♪''

'''Branch and Poppy''''':''                                          ''♪Just open up your heart let music take control.                                                                      I got that sunshine in my pocket                           I got that good soul in my feet                                 I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops♪''

'''The Snack Pack''': Ooh

'''Branch and Poppy''' ''[They look at each other in love]'': ''♪I can't take my eyes up off it.                                                                     Moving so phenomenally The room on lock the way you rock it                                                       So don't stop♪''

All:                                                                       ''♪And under the lights when everything goes. Nowhere to hide when I'm getting you close♪''

'''Cooper''': ''♪Can't stop, won't stop♪''

: ''[The Bergen begin to move to the beat of the music, much to the Chef's dismay. Satin and Shenille create a heart sign with their hair, and other Trolls join in to create more, and more]''

All: ''♪When we move well you already know♪''

'''Cooper''': ''♪Let's move, let's move♪''

All:                                                                         ''♪So, just imagine                                                Just imagine                                                        Just imagine♪''

:''[Trolls jump off chandeliers, and two glitter Trolls hug each other, creating a glow. The Chef watches this angrily, but when Chad and Todd stop her with their weapons, much to her anger]''

'''Branch and Poppy''':                                     ''♪Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance                                                 Feeling good good creeping up on you so just dance, dance, dance, come on                           All those things I shouldn't do you but you dance, dance, dance                                         And ain't nobody leaving soon so keep dancing♪''

:''[One of the Bergens begins to move to the rhythm of the song, to everyone's surprise. And the mother holding the child, joins in, then the Trolls move to the organ so that they start dancing]''

'''Branch''':                                                                     ''♪I can't stop the feeling                                       So, just dance, dance, dance                                 I can't stop the feeling                                          So, just dance, dance, dance, come on                               Ooh, it's something magical                                 It's in the air, it's in my blood, rushing on♪''

'''Branch and Poppy''':                                        ''♪Don't need no reason, don't need control.                                               I fly so high, no ceiling, when I'm in my zone                                    'Cause I got that sunshine in my pocket                                      Got that good soul in my feet                                I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops♪''

'''The Snack Pack''': Ooh

'''Branch and Poppy''':                                     ''♪Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance                                                 Feeling good good creeping up on you so just dance, dance, dance, come on                                                  All those things I shouldn't do you but you dance, dance, dance                                       
And ain't nobody leaving soon so keep dancing                                                                    
I can't stop the feeling                                      
So, just dance, dance, dance                                      
I can't stop the feeling                                                  
So just dance, dance, dance, come on                                I can't stop the feeling                                       So, just dance, dance, dance I can't stop the feeling                                                                     So keep dancing♪''

: ''[Soon, the entire filler room dances, and the joyful ogre-like humanoids enthusiastically throw their bibs into the air. Enraged, Chef pushes the guards away, and approaches Poppy and Branch, pulling out huge knives with a scream, ready to kill them, much to their horror. Bridget sees this, and at the last moment they throw a spoon at her former boss. When Chef is confused about this, DJ Suki and Smidge spray her eyes with lemon juice]''

'''Chef Bergen''': ''[covering her eyes, and not looking where she was going; last words]'' 
My eyes!

'''Satin and Chanille''': ''[run under Chef's leg, stretching her hair so that she stumble]'' Let's do it! 

:''[When this happens, the Chef ends up in the serving cart in which she previously locked the trolls setting it in motion, which does not impress any of the Bergens. After a while, Cooper lights a match and throws it straight onto the trap, causing the her explode to the Chef's much shock. A pot with a bergen lands on the stairs, rolling down them. Snack Pack run to the trap of the stairs to watch it. Chef screams in pain and horror, and the camera zooms in on her pouch in which Creek turns out to have spent the rest of the day unwisely after the betrayal. Realizing his fatal mistake, he can now only hold on and join in screaming. The pot breaks down the BergenTown gate]''

'''Branch''':''♪
Oh...
I can't stop the...                          
I can't stop the...                                                                        
I can't stop the...                                                   
I can't stop the...                                                       
I can't stop the feeling♪''

All:                                                                ''♪Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance
I can't stop the feeling                              
Feeling good good creeping up on you so just dance, dance, dance, come on.                                                    
I can't stop the feeling                                      
All those things I shouldn't do you but you dance, dance, dance                                                     
And ain't nobody leaving soon so keep dancing                                                    Everybody sing♪''

''♪Got this feeling in my body
''I can't stop the feeling
Got this feeling in my body
I can't stop the feeling                                                    
Wanna see you move your body                                                                        
I can't stop the feeling                                     
Got this feeling in my body                       
Break it down                                                   
Got this feeling in my body                                  
I can't stop the feeling                                    
Got this feeling in my body, come on♪''                    

:'''King Peppy''': ''[puts the tiara on head of daughter and raises her hand]'' Our new queen!

:'''Trolls''': Go, Queen Poppy! Way to go, Poppy!

:'''One Children of Trolls''': You did it! Alright, Queen Poppy!

:'''Biggie''': She's my friend! I know her! 

:''[Poppy and Branch tenderly hold hands, then Smidge uses her hair to raise the platform they are standing on to an extremely high level]''

''♪So just dance, dance, dance I can't stop the feeling So just dance, dance, dance I can't stop the feeling So keep dancing, come on♪''

:'''Branch''': ''[fondly]'' I know it's not officially hug time yet, but...

:'''Poppy''': ''[proudly]'' Now that I am queen, I decree that hug time... ..is all the time.

:''[Hug each other warmly. When suddenly, to their surprise, someone hugs them, they turn around and it turns out to be Cloud Guy]''

:'''Cloud Guy''': Up high!

:''[Irritated, they look at each other and high-five him, pushing him off the platform. Cloud Guy laughs and falls, then the two heroes go back to dancing, and the image changes to a 2D scrapbooking image. The screen then pans out beyond the book from starts of movie, which closes on its own]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[last lines, in a mid-credit scene, looking deads Creek and Chef is seen laying on the serving cart as it comes to a stop with the creak of wheels on something that looks like a hill. But the former minister of Trolls is still alive (although he has wounds and burns on face), and initially shows relief]''
:'''Creek''': Phew. ''[Chef raises his head, growling furiously after a failed attempt to take the throne. She then focuses her gaze on Creek, who jerks his head in terror, trying to resist, but to no avail, because Chef smiles maliciously and catches him. Then, lifting it towards her mouth, laughing evilly, then opening her mouth even wider, ready to devour him. Creek gets frightened shakes his head. And just as he's about to be bitten, he closes his eyes and grits his teeth; last words]'' But— Wait, wait, wait—
:''[Before she can do so, however, an earthquake strikes. Then the „hill” opens its eyes, revealing itself to be a giant monster (bigger than the one Poppy fell victim to), and opens its mouth, placing the two antagonists on its tongue shocked the Bergen's and Troll's. Then, without hesitation, the monster sending the serving cart into its mouth, whereby after a short hover in the air, two screaming characters falls in inside, what predator watches without reaction. The monster then closes its mouth again and falls asleep. Character's screams to echo from walls of its bottomless stomach — pit, but after a while they quickly fall silent. The screen goes black]''

==Cast==
* '''[[Anna Kendrick]]''' — Queen Primrose &quot;Poppy&quot; Help Springwater 
** '''Iris Dohrn''' (baby)
* '''[[Justin Timberlake]]''' — Branchifer &quot;Branch&quot; Dory 
** '''Liam Henry''' (kid)
* '''[[Zooey Deschanel]]''' — Bridget / Lady Glittersparkles
* '''[[w:Christopher Mintz-Plasse|Christopher Mintz-Plasse]]''' — Prince Gristle
* '''[[w:Christine Baranski|Christine Baranski]]''' — Chef Bergen
* '''[[Russell Brand]]''' — Creek
* '''[[w:James Corden|James Corden]]''' — Biggie
* '''[[w:Jeffrey Tambor|Jeffrey Tambor]]''' — King Peppy Help Springwater 
* '''[[w:Ron Funches|Ron Funches]]''' — Cooper
* '''[[w:Icona Pop|Aino Jawo]]''' — Satin
* '''[[w:Icona Pop|Caroline Hjelt]]''' — Chenille
* '''[[w:Kunal Nayyar|Kunal Nayyar]]''' — Guy Diamond
* '''[[w:Quvenzhané Wallis|Quvenzhané Wallis]]''' — Harper
* '''[[John Cleese]]''' — King Gristle Sr.
* '''[[w:Gwen Stefani|Gwen Stefani]]''' — DJ Suki
* '''[[w:Mike Mitchell (director)|Mike Mitchell]]''' — Darius, Vinny the Phone, Captain Starfunkle, Spider, Wedgie Bergen #1, Chad &amp; Card
* '''[[w:Walt Dohrn|Walt Dohrn]]''' — Smidge, Fuzzbert, Cloud Guy, Mr. Dinkles, Tunnel Troll, Wedgie Bergen #2
* '''GloZell''' (US) / '''Dami Im''' (Australia) / '''Susanna Reid''' (UK) — Rosiepuff Dory 
* '''Meg DeAngelis''' (US) / '''Connie Glynn''' (UK) — Moxie Dewdrop
* '''Ricky Dillon''' (US) / '''Greg James''' (UK) — Aspen Heitz
* '''Kandee Johnson''' (US) / '''Abbey Clancy''' (UK) — Mandy Sparkledust
* '''Grace Helbig''' (US) / '''Carrie Hope Fletcher''' (UK) — Cookie Sugarloaf

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons category|Trolls (film)}}

{{Trolls}}
{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2016 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2016 American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American animated romance films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:American romantic comedy films]]
[[Category:Films about trolls]]
[[Category:Films directed by Mike Mitchell]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:DreamWorks Animation]]</text>
      <sha1>gyb11ly67mtqfqt9ebu4zmq76oyi708</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Caligula (film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>192910</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965169</id>
      <parentid>3842275</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:32:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35055-39</username>
        <id>3342024</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965169</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="21509" sha1="905xg461khhuz2hfwxw6802wsqnzlmx" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Caligula Ny Carlsberg Glyptotek IN1453.jpg|thumb|If only all Rome had just one neck!]]
'''''[[w:Caligula (film)|Caligula]]''''' is a [[w:1979 in film|1979]] Italian-American erotic historical drama film about the rise and fall of the infamous Roman Emperor [[Caligula]].
:''Directed by [[w:Tinto Brass|Tinto Brass]]. Written by [[w:Tinto Brass|Tinto Brass]], [[Malcolm McDowell]], and [[w:Bob Guccione|Bob Guccione]], based on an original screenplay by [[Gore Vidal]].''
{{center|'''What would you have done if you had been given absolute power of life and death over everybody else in the whole world?'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]}}

== Caligula ==
[[File:Kejser Caligula (IN 2687).jpg|thumb|I am all men as I am no man, and therefore I am a god.]]
* With [[Tiberius]], there's always something to fear.
* At the insistence of the senate and the people of Rome, I accept humbly the highest office of our great republic.
* From this moment, all official oaths will contain the following phrase; I will value neither my life nor the lives of my children any more highly than I do the emperor and of his sister [[w:Drusilla (sister of Caligula)|Drusilla]].
* I am interested in all that is Rome, even down to the length of a toga.
* I am Rome. Wherever I am, Rome is, and ''there'' is the senate and the people of Rome.
* If only all Rome had just one neck!
* You see how I have exhausted myself to make your wedding holy. My blessings to you both.
* As if there ever could be an antidote against Caesar!
* I have existed from the morning of the world and I shall exist until the last star falls from the night. Although I have taken the form of Gaius Caligula, I am all men as I am no man, and therefore I am a god.

== Ennia ==
* Now you are a man, Caligula. What are you going to do? You must be the master of your own destiny. Take it with both hands.

== Tiberius ==
[[File:(Toulouse) Tibère - Musée Saint-Raymond Ra 342 b.jpg|thumb|Fate chose me to govern swine. In my old age, I am become a swineherd.]]
* I am nursing a viper in Rome's bosom.
* When Rome was just a city, we were just citizens, known to one another, you see. We were frugal, good, disciplined and dignified. The Romans I rule are not what they were. They lust. They lust for power and pleasure, money, the wives of other men. Oh yes, I am a true moralist, and stern as any [[Cato]]. Fate chose me to govern swine. In my old age, I am become a swineherd.
* Every senator believes himself to be a potential Caesar. Therefore every senator is guilty of treason, in thought if not in deed. The senate is the natural enemy of any Caesar, &quot;Little Boots&quot;. They offer to prove any law I made before I made it. I said: 'What if I go mad? What then?' No answer. They were born to be slaves.

== Dialogue ==
:'''Caligula''': Tell me, how is the emperor?
:'''Nerva''': Old, like me.
:'''Caligula''': I mean, how is his mood?
:'''Nerva''': Like the weather.
:'''Caligula''': The weather is good today!
:'''Nerva''': Changeable. I've heard that during the last month, seven of my colleagues in the senate have been put to death for treason.
:'''Caligula''': Nine, to be exact. Five of them cheated. They killed ''themselves''. That wasn't playing fair. Don't you agree, [[w:Marcus Cocceius Nerva (jurist)|Nerva]]?
:'''Nerva''': They were all good men.
:'''Caligula''': If they were good men, how could their beloved emperor find them guilty?
:'''Nerva''': You have a gift for logic, prince.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tiberius''': Help me, Nerva. Help me transform this young barbarian into a Roman Caesar.
:'''Nerva''': There have been three Roman Caesars; [[Julius Caesar|Julius]], [[Augustus]] and yourself. Which do you want him to be?
:'''Tiberius''': The best.
:'''Nerva''': That would be your father Augustus.
:'''Tiberius''': You see, Caligula? I'm insulted to my face.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tiberius''': I'm old.
:'''Caligula''': Yes, lord. But you will live forever.
:'''Tiberius''': All my family are dead but you, the child [[w:Tiberius Gemellus|Gemellus]], and that [[w:Claudius|Claudius]], that uncle. They were struck down by fate, and it is fate, &quot;Little Boots&quot;, that rules us, not any god.
:'''Caligula''': You are a god, lord.
:'''Tiberius''': No I'm not, not even when I am dead.
:'''Caligula''': Julius Caesar and Augustus Caesar, they are gods.
:'''Tiberius''': So say the senate, and so the people prefer to believe. Such myths are useful.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:Bust of the Roman Emperor Caligula, Romisch-Germanisches Museum, Cologne (8115617468).jpg|thumb|Serve the state, Caligula, although the people in it are wicked beasts.]]
:'''Tiberius''': Serve the state, Caligula, although the people in it are wicked beasts.
:'''Caligula''': But they love you, lord.
:'''Tiberius''': No, they fear me, and that is much better. I have no choice, you see. No choice. 
:'''Caligula''': No choice?
:'''Tiberius''': All I wanted was private life. I did not truly want to become emperor, but I had to.
:'''Caligula''': Had to? 
:'''Tiberius''': If someone else had become emperor, I would have been killed, as you will be.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tiberius''': ''[seeing Nerva has cut his wrists]'' Cretins... why did you permit him to do it? Bind his wrists... BIND HIS WRISTS! ''[to Nerva]'' You must not go, you must not leave me, you are my friend, my only friend.
:'''Nerva''': I've lived too long, Tiberius, I hate my life.
:'''Tiberius''': ''[to the slaves]'' Leave us! Both of you!
:'''Nerva''': For a man to choose the hour of his own death is the closest he will ever come to tricking fate, and fate decrees that when you die, [[w:Naevius Sutorius Macro|Macro]] will kill me.
:'''Tiberius''': I'll arrest him and have him executed.
:'''Nerva''': You can't. He controls you. ''[Looks at Caligula]'' Anyway, even with Macro dead, how could I go on living with this reptile?
:'''Tiberius''': ''[To Caligula]'' You will respect my friend always, won't you, reptile?
:'''Caligula''': I've always respected him, lord.
:'''Tiberius''': ''[To Nerva]'' You hear?
:'''Nerva''': Tiberius, you were wise once.
:'''Tiberius''': Ah, don't taunt me. I am old. 
:'''Nerva''': I've watched you grow into a monster! One by one, I've seen you murder your whole family, your friends, the noblest men in Rome. 
:'''Caligula''': That is treason! 
:'''Nerva''': No, it's the truth. 
:'''Tiberius''': I am and I always have been surrounded by enemies. In my own family, in the senate... You are cruel! 
:'''Nerva''': No, honest. Old men can sometimes see the future. So, from evils past, and the evils yet to come, I now choose to escape.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caligula''': Nerva, what's it like?
:'''Nerva''': Warm, no pain. Just drifting away.
:'''Caligula''': Do you see her?
:'''Nerva''': Who?
:'''Caligula''': The goddess, [[w:Isis|Isis]].
:'''Nerva''': So you're one of those who believe.
:'''Caligula''': Do you see her?
:'''Nerva''': No.
:'''Caligula''': Are you sure? You're almost dead. What's it like? What's happening to you now?
:'''Nerva''': Nothing.
:'''Caligula''': You're lying. You can see her, I know you can. What is she like?
:'''Nerva''': No. Nothing at all. Just sleep.
:'''Caligula''': ''Liar!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caligula''': Did you see their faces when I told them they had to swear not only to me, but to you? 
:'''Drusilla''': They were appalled. 
:'''Caligula''': I do hope so!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caligula''': I'm going to marry you.
:'''Drusilla''': You can't. We're not Egyptians.
:'''Caligula''': I know. We are much more beautiful.
:'''Drusilla''': Rome is not Egypt, and stop looking at yourself like that. 
:'''Caligula''': Let's go to Egypt then.
:'''Drusilla''': You are a fool.
:'''Caligula''': Caesar cannot be a fool.
:'''Drusilla''': But he's trying very hard.
:'''Caligula''': Caesar cannot be a fool!
:'''Drusilla''': &quot;Little Boots&quot;, they'll throw you in the Tiber if you attempt to move the government. So, you're going to marry a respectable Roman lady of the senatorial class.
:'''Caligula''': No, I'm not.
:'''Drusilla''': Yes, you are! You've got to have an heir.
:'''Caligula''': Who will kill me when he grows up!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caligula''': ''That'' will be my wife.
:'''Drusilla''': Oh no! Not [[w:Caesonia|Caesonia]].
:'''Caligula''': You're impossible!
:'''Drusilla''': She's the most promiscuous woman in Rome.
:'''Caligula''': Perfect!
:'''Drusilla''': Caesonia's been divorced. She's extravagant, always in debt.
:'''Caligula''': I want her.
:'''Drusilla''': But not for a wife.
:'''Caligula''': Send her to me ''now''.
:'''Drusilla''': No, &quot;Little Boots&quot;. I won't let you do it. It wouldn't be wise.
:'''Caligula''': Yet such is the will of the senate and the people of Rome.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caligula''': I've told Caesonia that I would marry her 
:'''Drusilla''': Don't...
:'''Caligula''': But only after she has borne me a son.
:'''Drusilla''': How will you ever know its yours?
:'''Caligula''': Don't worry. I've got her very well guarded.
:'''Drusilla''': Then you can be sure one of the guards will be the father.
:'''Caligula''': No, they're all homosexuals who've been castrated.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
[[File:MC - Jupiter thronend.jpg|thumb|I am a god, or at least I will be when I'm dead.]]
:'''Caligula''': I want your honest advice. Should I make myself king of Rome?
:'''Claudius''': King? Well... But this is a republic, isn't it?
:'''Caligula''': Very well, then. I shall make myself king of the republic.
:'''Longinus''': But you're already greater than any king, Caesar.
:'''Caligula''': I am a god, or at least I will be when I'm dead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Caesonia''': They hate you now.
:'''Caligula''': Let them hate me, so long as they fear me.
:'''Caesonia''': They are senators and consuls. They are important men.
:'''Caligula''': So important that they approve all I do? They must be mad. I don't know what else to do to provoke them.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Proculus''': Divine Ceasar, PLEASE! What have I done? Why am I here?
:'''Caligula''': Treason!
:'''Proculus''': Treason? I have always been loyal to you!
:'''Caligula''': ''[laughs insanely]'' That IS your treason! You're an honest man, Proculus, which means a bad Roman! Therefore, you are a traitor! Logical, hmm? Ha, ha, ha!

== Quotes about ''Caligula'' ==
* ''Caligula'' is sickening, utterly worthless, shameful trash. If it is not the worst film I have ever seen, that makes it all the more shameful: People with talent allowed themselves to participate in this travesty.
** [[Roger Ebert]], [http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/caligula-1980 ''Caligula''] (22 September 1980)
* I don't see the film as being pornographic, and I certainly didn't set out to make a pornographic movie. It's a question of definitions. To me, pornography is a work of bad art, as opposed to good art. And I don't think Caligula qualifies under the heading of bad art. It was a huge commercial undertaking, and at the same time we wanted to make a serious statement. We've done with cinematic images what so many authors and historians have done with words - we have re-created a complex life-style that flourished before Christ and the Judeo-Christian philosophy came into being.
** [[w:Bob Guccione|Bob Guccione]], as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* The fact that we have used celebrated movie personalities to make a film with sexually explicit passages is probably the source of the controversy. People talk about the violence, of course, but it's easier and more sophisticated to say that you're shocked by the violence rather than the sex.
** Bob Guccione, as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* I promised that Caligula would fundamentally change the theatergoing public's perception of motion pictures. I said that it would foment changes within the industry itself. I really shot my mouth off, but I meant every word of it, and I still do.
** Bob Guccione, as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* I made Caligula for the masses, not for a few self-appointed elitists. Besides, every time I read a lousy review I wanted the pleasure of knowing it cost the author $7.50 to write it.
** Bob Guccione, as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* [We] had to remove a lot of the material that Gore had originally written into the script, so the film is now somewhat more sensual than the original version. In fact, just to give you one example, in the beginning - other than between Caligula and his sister, Drusilla - there were practically no heterosexual scenes at all. Every sex scene Vidal wrote was homosexual in content.
** Bob Guccione, as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* I never intended to involve myself, certainly not in the actual shooting, until I saw the way Brass had mishandled and brutalized the film's sexuality. No matter what instructions I gave him, no matter how many times we discussed a scene and agreed on its interpretation, Brass would go out of his way to do the opposite. When I was in Rome and present at the studio, he would work within the parameters we had originally agreed. The minute I left Rome or even turned my back, he would go thundering off on his own.
** Bob Guccione, as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* Let me tell you how ridiculous it got. When it came to casting certain senators and noblemen, [Brass] would deliberately recruit them from a pool of ex-convicts, thieves, and political anarchists that he happened to keep in touch with. That was his sense of humor.
** Bob Guccione, as quoted in &quot;Bob Guccione Caligula Interview from Penthouse May 1980&quot;. Penthouse: 112–118, 146–115.
* People think of him [''Caligula''] as a revolutionary or a figure of fun or a madman. There are so many aspects to him that we know really little about him, just the information that was given to us through a historian, a Roman historian called Suetonius, and he was from the other side of the family, so Suetonius paints Caligula as a very wicked madman, and that's the only reason that Suetonius considers why he did so many, on the face of it, crazy things. My interpretation of the character is not quite like that.
** [[Malcolm McDowell]], as quoted in ''A Documentary on the Making of Gore Vidal's Caligula'' [documentary] (1981), Cinemedia West Corporation
* The Roman Empire, like any other empire, was made up purely of bureaucrats, the army, the priests and everything else, and he systematically goes from one institution to the other, trying to provoke them and trying to get an action out of them, and this is why in our view the misconception is that Caligula was completely mad... Anyway, he tries to destroy the institutions. Of course, naturally, he never fails. I mean, he ''does'' fail, simply because it's impossible to destroy a burocracy, and I think that is a very relevant point for modern-day audiences.
** Malcolm McDowell, as quoted in ''A Documentary on the Making of Gore Vidal's Caligula'' [documentary] (1981), Cinemedia West Corporation
* I do recall one particular night shoot… We were called to the set at four o'clock in the afternoon. As usual, nothing was ready. They'd built a set of Tiberius's grotto, on three acres, and were assembling all of the extras and background. The producers worriedly asked if I would go into Peter's trailer (he was playing Tiberius) and go through the lines with him, which we did few times.&lt;br /&gt;And then he told me the most remarkable story – whether it is true or not I have no idea – about his grave-robbing Etruscan tombs. He said the best way to find Etruscan jewellery and artefacts was to find the drains in the tombs, and very gingerly sift through them with your fingers because, as the bodies decompose, all of the artifacts deposit themselves into the channels. The thought of Peter O'Toole on his hands and knees in an Etruscan catacomb makes for a lovely image.&lt;br /&gt;We spent hours and hours in this trailer. He was smoking … it certainly wasn't tobacco. By the time we got onto the set, 12 hours had passed. We couldn't believe our eyes: the set was covered with people engaging in every sexual perversion in the book. We were totally bemused.&lt;br /&gt;Peter would start off his speech, &quot;Rome was but a city...&quot; then pause, look around, and say to me: &quot;Are they doing the Irish jig over there?&quot; I'd look over and there would be two dwarves and an amputee dancing around some girls splayed out on a giant dildo. This went on quite a few times.
** Malcolm McDowell, as quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/film/filmblog/2013/dec/17/malcolm-mcdowell-peter-otoole-caligula-graves &quot;Malcolm McDowell on Peter O'Toole: Caligula, catacombs and chicken gizzards&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (17 December 2013)
* It has an irresistible mixture of art and genitals in it.
** [[w:Helen Mirren|Helen Mirren]], as quoted in ''A Documentary on the Making of Gore Vidal's Caligula'' [documentary] (1981), Cinemedia West Corporation
* The film was like being on an acid trip. It has its good moments and it has its bad moments and is a fantastical journey. It went where angels fear to tread. In many scenes, you're going: &quot;Oh my God, I can't believe we're going to actually shoot this!&quot; It was sort of horrific, but it was also wonderful.
** Helen Mirren, as quoted in [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1050722/Was-Caligula-greatest-Hollywood-history.html &quot;Was Caligula the greatest con in Hollywood history?&quot;], ''The Daily Mail'' (30 August 2008)
* Guccione hijacked the film and sandbagged everybody.
** Helen Mirren, as quoted in [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1050722/Was-Caligula-greatest-Hollywood-history.html &quot;Was Caligula the greatest con in Hollywood history?&quot;], ''The Daily Mail'' (30 August 2008)
* Many of the terrible things that we are going to show in this movie are indeed from history, or indeed from the only two sources that we have; Suetonius and Tacitus, and they may be true or they may not be true. But whatever they are, they are representative of something that those who are interested in history have known for 2000 years and which, until now, have never been [...] divulged to the general public.
** [[Gore Vidal]], as quoted in ''A Documentary on the Making of Gore Vidal's Caligula'' [documentary] (1981), Cinemedia West Corporation
* I've always been interested in the Roman Empire, since after all like so many of us I'm a child of the American Empire, and empires tend to be more like one another than different from one another. In a sense, we're looking in a mirror, and we're seeing not just an emperor 2000 years dead, but we see ourselves.
** Gore Vidal, as quoted in ''A Documentary on the Making of Gore Vidal's Caligula'' [documentary] (1981), Cinemedia West Corporation
* I think there is a Caligula in everybody, which after all was a pretty normal average young man, put in an abnormal and extraordinary situation, and I think that if I can communicate to an audience that in this monster there is something that is present in all of us, but for one reason or another, generally for lack of opportunity or some ethical sense stops us, therefore we are not in action Caligula. But I'm trying to go to something much deeper, which is in our dreams we are Caligula, and what, after all, is a film, what is celluloid but dreams made into a kind of shadow of reality?
** Gore Vidal, as quoted in ''A Documentary on the Making of Gore Vidal's Caligula'' [documentary] (1981), Cinemedia West Corporation

== Taglines ==
* What would you have done if you had been given absolute power of life and death over everybody else in the whole world?
* The most controversial film of the 20th century is now the most controversial film of the 21st century.
* They spoke of it first in whispers... then it took the media by storm.
* No rumour can match the reality.

== Cast ==
* [[Malcolm McDowell]] - [[Caligula]]
* [[w:Teresa Ann Savoy|Teresa Ann Savoy]] - [[w:Drusilla (sister of Caligula)|Drusilla]]
* [[w:Guido Mannari|Guido Mannari]] - [[w:Naevius Sutorius Macro|Macro]]
* [[John Gielgud]] - [[w:Marcus Cocceius Nerva (jurist)|Nerva]]
* [[w:Peter O'Toole|Peter O'Toole]] - [[Tiberius]]
* [[w:Giancarlo Badessi|Giancarlo Badessi]] - [[w:Claudius|Claudius]]
* [[Helen Mirren]] - [[w:Caesonia|Caesonia]]
* [[w:John Steiner|John Steiner]] - Longinus
* [[w:Paolo Bonacelli|Paolo Bonacelli]] - [[w:Cassius Chaerea|Chaerea]]
* [[w:Leopoldo Trieste|Leopoldo Trieste]] - Charicles
* [[w:Adriana Asti|Adriana Asti]] - [[w:Ennia Thrasylla|Ennia]]
* [[w:Mirella D'Angelo|Mirella Dangelo]] - Livia
* [[w:Rick Parets|Richard Parets]] - [[w:Mnester|Mnester]]
* Donato Placido - Proculus
* Osiride Pevarello - Giant
* Anneka Di Lorenzo - [[w:Messalina|Messalina]]
* Lori Wagner - [[w:Agrippina the Younger|Agrippina]]
* Bruno Brive - [[w:Tiberius Gemellus|Gemellus]]
* Paula Mitchell - Subura Singer

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0080491|title=Caligula}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=caligula|title=Caligula}}

[[Category:1979 films]]
[[Category:1970s American films]]
[[Category:Cult films]]
[[Category:Drama films]]
[[Category:Period films]]
[[Category:Incest in film]]
[[Category:Sexploitation films]]</text>
      <sha1>905xg461khhuz2hfwxw6802wsqnzlmx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mighty Magiswords</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>193230</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965075</id>
      <parentid>3955434</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:53:27Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>ENOUGH</comment>
      <origin>3965075</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4995" sha1="hc5lq4irzt3cw9k6eymcr6k7jqyq0o2" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Mighty Magiswords|Mighty Magiswords]]''''' (2016–19) was an American Flash animated fantasy comedy online and television series created by [[w:Kyle A. Carrozza|Kyle A. Carrozza]]. It is about Prohyas and Vambre Warrior, a pair of sibling teammates of the Warriors for Hire that are the leader and vice leader of the Adventurers of the Atmosphere, who go on hilarious adventures and crazy quests around a planet known as the Magiplanet of Lyvsheria located within a video game atmosphere named &quot;the Magisphere&quot; to find and collect [[magic sword]]s called Super Mighty Magiswords.

{{tv-stub}}

== Season 1 ==
===''Case Clothed'' [1.03]===
:'''Prohyas''': Ahoy there, lads. Stand back, or I'll pip-pip you right in the cheerios.

===''Cleanliness Is Next to Grupliness'' [1.05]===
:'''Vambre''': Grup, please come down from there.
:'''Grup''': No! You guys have been acting weird all day, and I don't like it.
:'''Prohyas''': It's okay, duder. Just come down, and I'll show you my favorite Magisword trick: dolphin water.
:'''Grup''': Dolphin wa...?! You guys are doing this on purpose?! Oh, I'm getting outta here.
:''[He flies out of the house and Vambre and Prohyas started chasing him]''

===''Potion in the Ocean'' [1.11]===
:''[last lines of the episode]''
:'''Mr. Packard''': At last, they're all mine. ''[digging the bag]'' Hello... ''[sees an acorn]'' acorn? ''[picking up more acorns]'' Acorns? Acorns? Acorns? ''Golden'' acorns?!
:''[Mr. Packard spills the bag full of acorns]''
:'''Mr. Packard''': NOTHING BUT ACORNS!!! ''[snarls in rage]'' '''''VAMBRE!!!!! PROHYAS!!!!!'''''

==Cast==
*{{w|Kyle A. Carrozza}} – Prohyas Warrior, Announcer, Battle Grup the Dragon, Nohyas, Handbre, Old Man Mr. Oldman, Slug Burger Clerk, Tree J, Piggy, Zombie Pumpkin Magisword, Super Mighty Magibot Robopiggeh Model No. 1.3 (RP-1.3), Oinkus Oinkus Magisword, Attractive Voice Magisword, Snowmanpire, Underground Handbeast, Goomer, Franklo, Attacktus, Tabble Prug, Squirrels, Helmut, Translator, Biblia Tick, Monkey Chunks, Swish Navy Magisword, Naso, Hambus, Bird, Pirate 6, Pirate 7, Long Underwear Wolf, Wolf Translator, Reginald, Wobbles, Parrot Scissor Magisword
*[[Grey DeLisle]] – Vambre Marie Warrior, Princess Zange Rhyboflaven, Mysterious Hooded Woman, Füd, Pirate 5, Pirate 4, Pirate 3
*{{w|Eric Bauza}} – Hoppus, Phil, King Rexxtopher, Landfill, Surveillance Dinos, Orange Speckled Stegosaurus
*[[Mr. Lawrence]] – Ralphio, Jest-O the Best-O, Dino, Loch Mess Monster, Helmut (TV Series), Carnivorous Plant Magisword
*Lindsay Smith-Carrozza – Witchy Simone, Lady Hiss, Crowd Woman
*{{w|Arin Hanson}} – Gateaux, Delivery Man Steve, Zonq, Additional Voices
*{{w|Phil LaMarr}} – Noville at Arms, Long James Pirate Mayor, Sidney, Old Guy Mr. Oldguy, Tall Uninteresting One
*{{w|Hal Lublin}} – Omnubis, Smashroom, Ice Posey, Pirate 1, Pirate 2, Pirate 8, Shopkeeper
*{{w|Mary Faber}} – Morbidia Steinberg, Additional Voices
*{{w|Luke Ski}} – Skullivan, Docky Boardman, Nyando, Additional Voices
*{{w|Candi Milo}} –  Vambre's Brain, Grand Poobah, Mascott, Additional Voices
*{{w|Jim Cummings}} - Keeper of the Mask, Buford, Barren Faceland, Talking Cauldron
*{{w|Townsend Coleman}} - Neddy the Mallet, Beeswax Crown
*{{w|Jess Harnell}} – Bag Puppets, Füd Fit Theme Song Singer
*{{w|Ken Mitchroney}} - Mr. Pachydermus Packard, House the Door, Sales Deer
*{{w|Tom Kenny}} – Taunting Jester Magisword
*{{w|Kyle Massey}} – Mr. Spoony, Brachiosaurus, Ankylosaurus
*{{w|Kate Micucci}} – Penny Plasm, Baby
*{{w|Bill Kopp}} – Man Fish the Fish Man, Eel
*[[Dana Gould]] – Norman Warrior, Fish Pirate
*Renee Albert – Kablammica Warrior
*{{w|Judy Tenuta}} – Queen Porcina
*{{w|Pete Holmes}} – Teri Gargantuan the Spider
*{{w|&quot;Weird Al&quot; Yankovic}} – Papa Kotassian, Additional Kotassians
*{{w|Erica Luttrell}} – Glori
*{{w|Jack McBrayer}} – Snax
*{{w|Gilbert Gottfried}} – Prohyas' Stomach
*{{w|Eddie Pepitone}} – Mr. DeBizz
*{{w|Dave Coulier}} – Murray Williams
*{{w|Jeff Bennett}} – Sir Grimmsibald Femursworth
*{{w|Dave &quot;Gruber&quot; Allen}} – Count Frostferatu
*{{w|Maria Bamford}}  – Tara Byte Administrator (T_B.admin) Version (Ver.) 11.0
*{{w|Micky Dolenz}} – Wendell the Love Grub
*{{w|Paul Schrier}} – Flonk

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://mightymagiswords.wikia.com/wiki/Mighty_Magiswords_Wiki] &amp;ndash; Mighty Magiswords Wiki page

{{Authority control}}
[[Category:2010s American animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Flash animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated action TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about dragons]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about siblings]]</text>
      <sha1>hc5lq4irzt3cw9k6eymcr6k7jqyq0o2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mickey Mouse</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>194163</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965187</id>
      <parentid>3957668</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T04:24:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-33625-15</username>
        <id>3337022</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965187</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6713" sha1="teffvt7n5gx2p8uz1qyb1006rhmhp6o" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Mickey Mouse &amp; Friends logo.png|thumb]]
'''[[w:Mickey Mouse|Mickey Mouse]]''' (also known as '''Michael Theodore Mouse''') is a cartoon character created in 1928 at [[w:Walt Disney Animation Studios|Walt Disney Animation Studios]], who serves as the mascot of [[w:The Walt Disney Company|The Walt Disney Company]]. 

Created as a replacement for a prior Disney character, [[w:Oswald the Lucky Rabbit|Oswald the Lucky Rabbit]], Mickey first appeared in the short ''[[w:Plane Crazy|Plane Crazy]]'', debuting publicly in the short film ''[[w:Steamboat Willie|Steamboat Willie]]'' (1928), one of the first sound cartoons. In all, the character has appeared in over 130 films, including ''[[w:The Band Concert|The Band Concert]]'' (1935), ''[[w:Brave Little Tailor|Brave Little Tailor]]'' (1938), and ''[[w:Fantasia (1940 film)|Fantasia]]'' (1940). Mickey appeared primarily in short films, but also occasionally in feature-length films. Ten of Mickey's cartoons were nominated for the [[w:Academy Award for Best Animated Short Film|Academy Award for Best Animated Short Film]], one of which, ''[[w:Lend a Paw|Lend a Paw]]'', won the award in 1942. In 1978, Mickey Mouse became the first cartoon character to have a star on the [[w:Hollywood Walk of Fame|Hollywood Walk of Fame]]. 

From 1930, the character has featured in comic strips and comic books. The [[w:Mickey Mouse (comic strip)|Mickey Mouse comic strip]], drawn primarily by [[w:Floyd Gottfredson|Floyd Gottfredson]], ran for 45 years. The mouse appeared in comic books such as ''[[w:Mickey Mouse (comic book)|Mickey Mouse]]'', Disney Italy's ''[[w:Topolino|Topolino]]'' and ''[[w:MM Mickey Mouse Mystery Magazine|MM – Mickey Mouse Mystery Magazine]]'', and ''[[w:Wizards of Mickey|Wizards of Mickey]]''. Mickey also features in television series such as ''[[w:The Mickey Mouse Club|The Mickey Mouse Club]]'' (1955–1996) and others. 

He appears in other media such as video games, and is a meetable character at the Disney parks. Mickey generally appears alongside his girlfriend [[w:Minnie Mouse|Minnie Mouse]], [[w:Minnie Mouse|her]] twin nieces [[w:Minnie Mouse|Millie and Melody Mouse]], [[w:Minnie Mouse|her]] pet cat [[w:Pinocchio (1940 film)|Figaro]], his pet dog [[w:Pluto (Disney)|Pluto]], his friends such as [[w:Donald Duck|Donald Duck]], [[w:Donald Duck|his]] hypnotist girlfriend [[w:Daisy Duck|Daisy Duck]], [[w:Goofy|Goofy]], [[w:The Fox and the Cat|Honest John]], [[w:Bambi (character)|Bambi]], [[w:Thumper (Bambi)|Thumper]], [[w:Flower (Bambi)|Flower]], [[w:Chip 'n' Dale|Chip 'n' Dale]], [[w:Fun and Fancy Free|Bongo and Lulubelle]], [[w:List of Disney's Cinderella characters|Gus]], [[w:List of Disney's Cinderella characters|Anastasia Tremaine]], [[w:List of Disney's Cinderella characters|Lucifer]], [[w:Chip 'n' Dale|Clarice]], [[w:Ben and Me|Amos Mouse]], [[w:Lady and the Tramp|Lady]], [[w:Lady and the Tramp|Si and Am]], [[w:Lady and the Tramp|Peg]], [[w:Lady and the Tramp|Boris, Bull, Dachsie, Toughy and Pedro]], [[w:Kanga (Winnie-the-Pooh)|Kanga]], [[w:Roo|Roo]], [[w:The Aristocats|Roquefort]], [[w:The Aristocats|Duchess, Marie, Berlioz and Toulouse]], [[w:The Rescuers|Penny and Rufus]], [[w:Kanga (Winnie-the-Pooh)|her]] best friend [[w:Oliver &amp; Company|Georgette]], [[w:List of TaleSpin characters|Rebecca and Molly Cunningham]], [[w:List of TaleSpin characters|Kitten Kaboodle]], [[w:List of TaleSpin characters|Lotta Lamour]] among others (see [[w:Mickey Mouse universe|Mickey Mouse universe]]). Though originally characterized as a cheeky lovable rogue, Mickey was rebranded over time as a nice guy, usually seen as an honest and bodacious hero. In 2009, Disney began to rebrand the character again by putting less emphasis on his friendly, well-meaning persona and reintroducing the more adventurous and stubborn sides of his personality, beginning with the video game [[w:Epic Mickey|Epic Mickey]].
[[sv:Musse Pigg]]

==Quotes==
:&lt;small&gt;'''In chronological order within each section.'''&lt;/small&gt;
===1931–1941===
* In the current American mythology, Mickey Mouse is the imp, the benevolent dwarf of older fables, and like them he is far more popular than the important gods, heroes, and ogres. Over a hundred prints of each of his adventures are made, and of the fifteen thousand movie houses wired for sound in America, twelve thousand show his pictures. So far he has been deathless, as the demand for the early Mickey Mouses continues although they are nearly four years old; they are used at children’s matinées, for request programs, and as acceptable fillers in programs of short subjects. It is estimated that over a million separate audiences see him every year.
** [[w:Gilbert Seldes|Gilbert Seldes]] [https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1931/12/19/walt-disney-profile-mickey-mouse-maker &quot;Mickey-Mouse Maker: Walt Disney at thirty&quot;], ''The New Yorker'' (December 11, 1931)

* The first Mickey Mouse was made by twelve people after hours in a garage. About twelve  hundred people are working overtime now in a fifty-one-acre plant.
** [[Walt Disney]] [https://archive.org/stream/american22asch/american22asch_djvu.txt &quot;Growing Pains&quot;], ''Journal  of  the  Society  of  Motion  Picture Engineers'' (January 1941),  Vol.  XXXVI,  pp.  30-40, reprinted in ''American Cinematographer'' (1941), p. 106 (reproduced by the Internet Archive)

===2009===
* How long does copyright extend today? According to the [[w:Sonny Bono|Sonny Bono]] [[w:Copyright Term Extension Act|Copyright Term Extension Act]] of 1998 (also known as &quot;the Mickey Mouse Protection Act,&quot; because Mickey was about to fall into the public domain), it lasts as long as the life of the author plus seventy years. In practice, that normally would mean more than a century.
* To descend from the high principles of the [[w:Founding Fathers of the United States|Founding Fathers]] to the practices of the cultural industries today is to leave the realm of Enlightenment for the hurly-burly of corporate capitalism. If we turned the sociology of knowledge onto the present—as [[Pierre Bourdieu|[Pierre] Bourdieu]] himself did—we would see that we live in a world designed by Mickey Mouse, red in tooth and claw.
** [[w:Robert Darnton|Robert Darnton]] [https://www.nybooks.com/articles/2009/02/12/google-the-future-of-books/ &quot;Google &amp; the Future of Books&quot;], ''New York Review of Books'' (February 12, 2009)
** The first released Mickey Mouse cartoon, ''[[Steamboat Willie]]'' (1928), finally entered the [[w:Public domain|public domain]] on January 1, 2024.
* Ending Catchphrases:
** ''See you real soon!'' (1955-2007)
** ''We’ll see you next time!'' (2021-present)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Fictional characters]]</text>
      <sha1>teffvt7n5gx2p8uz1qyb1006rhmhp6o</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Return of the Living Dead</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>195406</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965189</id>
      <parentid>3961731</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T04:41:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39783-56</username>
        <id>3350181</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */ Fixed typo</comment>
      <origin>3965189</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8943" sha1="dsc6nr7njltlkdq0o85mk8gtidkvch5" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:The Return of the Living Dead|The Return of the Living Dead]]''''' is a [[w:1985 in film|1985 film]] about two employees at a medical supply warehouse who accidentally release a deadly gas into the air that causes the dead to rise as zombies.
:''Directed by [[w:Dan O'Bannon|Dan O'Bannon]]. Written by [[w:John A. Russo|John A. Russo]].''
{{center|'''They're Back From The Grave and Ready To Party!'''&amp;nbsp; &lt;small&gt;([[#Taglines|taglines]])&lt;/small&gt;}}

== Burt Wilson ==
* ''[on the phone with the police]'' Listen, there's a bunch of people from the cemetery who are stark, staring, mad, and they'll kill you and eat you if they catch you. It's like a disease. It's like rabies, only faster, a lot faster. That's why you've got to come and get us out of here now... right now!

== Other ==
* '''Freddy''': ''[to Tina]'' Gee... And now you made me hurt myself again! You made me break my hand completely off this time Tina! But I don't care Darlin', because I love you, and you've got to let me EAT YOUR BRAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIINS! WHERE ARE YOU!
* '''Casey''': Chuck, I never did like you. Oh, but God, hold me tight.

== Dialogue ==
:'''Freddy''': What's the weirdest thing you ever saw in here?
:'''Frank''': Oh, kid, I have seen weird things come and I have seen weird things go. But the weirdest thing I ever saw just had to cap it all.
:'''Freddy''': Oh, yeah? What's that?
:'''Frank''': Let me ask you a question, kid. Did you see that movie, ''[[Night of the Living Dead]]''?
:'''Freddy''': Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's the one where the corpses start eating the people, right? Sure. Wh-what about it?
:'''Frank''': Did you know that movie was based on a true case?
:'''Freddy''': Come on, you're shitting me, right?
:'''Frank''': I've never been more serious in my life.
:'''Freddy''': That's not possible. I mean, they showed zombies taking over the world.
:'''Frank''': They changed it all around. What really happened was back in 1969, in Pittsburgh, at the V.A. hospital, there was a chemical spill and all that stuff kinda leaked down into the morgue and it made all the dead bodies kinda jump around as though it was alive.
:'''Freddy''': What chemical?
:'''Frank''': 2-4-5 Trioxin, it's called. It was to kinda spray on marijuana or something. And the Darrow Chemical Company was trying to develop it for the Army. And they told the guy who made the movie that if he told the true story, they'd just sue his ass off. So he changed all the facts around.
:'''Freddy''': So what really happened?
:'''Frank''': Well, they closed it all down, see, and the Army shipped all that contaminated dirt and all those dead bodies out. And they kept it a secret.
:'''Freddy''': So how come you know about it?
:'''Frank''': A typical Army fuck up. The Transportation Department got the orders crossed, and they shipped those bodies here instead of to the Darrow Chemical Company.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Trash''': Do you ever wonder about all the different ways of dying? You know, violently? And wonder, like, what would be the most horrible way to die?
:'''Spider''': I try not too think about dying too much.
:'''Trash''': Mm. Well for me, the worst way would be for a bunch of old men to get around me, and start biting and eating me alive.
:'''Spider''': I see.
:'''Trash''': First, they would tear off my clothes...
:'''Chuck''': Hey, somebody get some light over here, Trash is taking off her clothes again.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Suicide''': Nobody understands me, you know that? I fuckin' bust my ass for you guys, and what do I get? &quot;You're spooky.&quot; Fuck you, man. Fuck you all. 
:'''Trash''': I like it spooky. 
:'''Suicide''': I got somethin' to say, you know? What do you think this is all about? You think this is a fuckin' costume? This is a way of life! 
:'''Trash''': ''[sidling up to him]'' Yes! 
:'''Suicide''': What's wrong with you, man? Show some fuckin' respect for the dead, will ya?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Ernie has restrained a zombie onto a mortuary table in order to talk to it]''
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': You can hear me?
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': Yes.
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Why do you eat people?
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': Not people. Brains.
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Brains only?
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': Yes.
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Why?
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': The PAIN!
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': What about the pain?
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': The pain of being DEAD!
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': ''[laughs nervously]'' It hurts... to be dead.
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': I can feel myself rot.
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Eating brains... How does that make you feel?
:'''1/2 Woman Corpse''': It makes the pain, go away!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Burt Wilson''': I thought you said if we destroyed the brain, it'd die!
:'''Frank''': It worked in the movie!
:'''Burt Wilson''': Well, it ain't working now, Frank!
:'''Freddy''': You mean the movie lied?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Burt Wilson''': You did what? You opened it? You stupid moron! You idiot! What's the matter with you Frank? Haven't I already told you never to even go near those goddamn tanks?
:'''Frank''': What are we gonna do, Burt?
:'''Burt Wilson''': I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to be sued by the Darrow Chemical Company. I might even be investigated by the government. I might become very famous. I might even lose my business. I might even go to jail, goddamn it! That's what I'm going to do!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Burt Wilson''': What about the bones Ernie?
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Bones are no problem. Hardest thing to burn is the heart.
:'''Burt Wilson''': A heart, why?
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': 'cause it's just one big tough muscle.
:'''Burt Wilson''': Yeah, but Ernie, I mean, c'mon, we don't want the heart sticking around!
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Then I'll turn it up hotter for the heart.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spider''': Man, look, how can we kill those '''''things'''''?
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': '''''You don't'''''.
:'''Spider''': Da fuck you mean, &quot;'''''You don't'''''&quot;?
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Burt.
:'''Burt Wilson''': You can't kill those mothers, they're already dead. You gotta understand they're not living creatures, they're animated. I mean, you can chop them up into pieces, the pieces would still come after you.
:'''Spider''': Oh, fuck!
:'''Burt Wilson''': All you can do is just burn'em. You got to totally reduce them to ashes, so there's nothing left to come after you.
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': [terrified] How you gonna burn all those things?
:'''Spider''': Man, there's a hundred of those fuckers!
:'''Burt Wilson''': Yeah, that is the question.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Burt...that favor you owe me?
:'''Burt Wilson''': Yeah.
:'''Ernie Kaltenbrunner''': Watch your ass out there.

== Taglines ==
* They're Back From The Grave and Ready To Party!

== About ==
* We go to these horror conventions around the country, and we meet fans that, really, the movie impacted their lives. They really enjoyed it. So we have to see it again sometimes to do panels. I think I'm most proud of that we all played it straight. We all were schooled to do it, not knowing what the results and the tone were going to be ultimately. I didn't, anyway, so we're all playing our own personal straight thing, and that, combined with everybody else's style, turned into an interesting, watchable movie.
** [[w:John Philbin|John Philbin]], [https://dailydead.com/comic-con-2016-interview-thom-mathews-john-philbin-reflect-on-the-return-of-the-living-dead/ Comic-Con 2016 Interview: Thom Mathews &amp; John Philbin Reflect on THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD] (August 3, 2016).

== Cast ==
* [[w:Clu Gulager|Clu Gulager]] — Burt Wilson
* [[w:James Karen|James Karen]] — Frank
* [[w:Don Calfa|Don Calfa]] — Ernie Kaltenbrunner
* [[w:Thom Mathews|Thom Mathews]] — Freddy
* Beverly Randolph — Tina
* [[w:John Philbin|John Philbin]] — Chuck
* [[w:Jewel Shepard|Jewel Shepard]] — Casey
* [[w:Miguel A. Núñez, Jr.|Miguel Núñez]] — Spider
* Brian Peck — Scuz
* [[w:Linnea Quigley|Linnea Quigley]] — Trash
* [[w:Mark Venturini|Mark Venturini]] — Suicide
* [[w:Jonathan Terry|Jonathan Terry]] — Colonel Glover
* [[w:Cathleen Cordell|Cathleen Cordell]] — Colonel's Wife

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=0089907|title=The Return of the Living Dead}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=return_of_the_living_dead|title=The Return of the Living Dead}}
* {{amg movie|id=41098|title=The Return of the Living Dead}}
* {{mojo title|id=returnofthelivingdead|title=The Return of the Living Dead}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Return of the Living Dead, The}}
[[Category:1985 films]]
[[Category:1980s American films]]
[[Category:Black comedy films]]
[[Category:Comedy horror films]]
[[Category:Independent films]]
[[Category:Science fiction horror films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:Films about zombies]]
[[Category:Films set in Kentucky]]</text>
      <sha1>dsc6nr7njltlkdq0o85mk8gtidkvch5</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>195860</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965007</id>
      <parentid>3963507</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:13:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Elcarim1</username>
        <id>3345595</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965007</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="41687" sha1="3vyag29vgkvshzv8toq53c2fsa7mar9" xml:space="preserve">{{people-cleanup}}
[[File:Congreso Futuro 2020 - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie 02.jpg|thumb|Why did people ask &quot;What is it about?&quot; as if a novel had to be about only one thing.]]
'''[[w:Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie|Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie]]''' (born 15 September 1977) is a [[w:Nigerian|Nigerian]] author and activist. She was described in ''The Times Literary Supplement'' as &quot;the most prominent&quot; of a &quot;procession of critically acclaimed young anglophone authors that is succeeding in attracting a new generation of readers to African literature.&quot;

Adichie's novels include ''[[w:Purple Hibiscus|Purple Hibiscus]] (2003), [[w:Half of a Yellow Sun|Half of a Yellow Sun|Half of a Yellow Sun]] (2006), and ''[[w:Americanah|Americanah]]'' (2013). 
Her 2009 [[w:TED Talk|TED Talk]], &quot;The Danger of a Single Story&quot; is one of the most viewed TED Talks and her 2012 talk, &quot;[[w:We Should All Be Feminists|We Should All Be Feminists]]&quot; was sampled by American singer [[Beyoncé]] as well as featured on a T-shirt by the French fashion house Dior in 2016. 

Adichie has received numerous academic awards, fellowships, and other honours, among them a [[w:MacArthur Fellowship|MacArthur Fellowship]] in 2008 and induction into the [[w:American Academy of Arts and Sciences|American Academy of Arts and Sciences]] in 2017.

== Quotes ==

*The problem with [[gender]] is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognising how we are. Now imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves if we didn't have the weight of gender expectations. 
** On [https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_we_should_all_be_feminists#t-1300116 We should all be feminists] [[TED Conference|TED]]xEutson (December 2012)

* My father tells a story about his father dying in a [[refugee]] camp. His father was a titled man in Igboland, which meant that he was a great man. He had one of the highest titles a man could have. But his hometown fell, so he had to leave and go to a refugee camp, and he died and he was buried in a mass grave. Which is just heartbreaking for a man, particularly a man like him. My father, who's the first son, and who takes his responsibilities very seriously, couldn't go to bury his father because the roads were occupied. He was in a different part of Biafra and so it took a year until ... he could go to the refugee camp. ... And he goes there and he says, 'I want to know where my father was buried.' And somebody waved very vaguely and said, 'Oh we buried the people there.' So it was a mass grave. So many people had died. And my father says he went there and he took a handful of sand, and he said he's kept the sand ever since. For me, that was one of the most moving things I had ever heard.&quot;
**On how warfare in Nigeria affected her family in [https://www.npr.org/2013/06/27/195598496/americanah-author-explains-learning-to-be-black-in-the-u-s &quot;'Americanah' Author Explains 'Learning' To Be Black In The U.S.&quot;]  ''NPR'' (June 27, 2013)


*No matter who we are, we dream.

**[https://www.cnn.com/2025/04/03/Tv/video/amanpour-chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-dream-count/ Chimamanda Adichie in her novel dream count] 


* In Nigeria I'm not black ... We don't do race in Nigeria. We do ethnicity a lot, but not race. My friends here don't really get it. Some of them sound like white Southerners from 1940. They say, &quot;Why are black people complaining about race? Racism doesn't exist!' It's just not a part of their existence.&quot;
**On how views of race differ in Nigeria than the United States in [https://www.vogue.co.uk/article/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-novelist-ted-speaker-interview &quot;Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'I Wanted To Claim My Own Name'&quot;] ''Vogue'' (November 3, 2015)

* I don’t think sexism is worse than racism, it’s impossible even to compare ... It’s that I feel lonely in my fight against sexism, in a way that I don’t feel in my fight against racism. My friends, my family, they get racism, they get it. The people I’m close to who are not black get it. But I find that with sexism you are constantly having to explain, justify, convince, make a case for.
**On why sexism is at times a more difficult argument for her than racism in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/apr/28/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-feminism-racism-sexism-gender-metoo &quot;Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'This could be the beginning of a revolution'&quot;] ''The Guardian'' (April 28, 2018)

* I don’t think I’m more inherently likely to do domestic work, or childcare ... It doesn’t come pre-programmed in your vagina, right?
**On how she views gender as a social construct in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/apr/28/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-feminism-racism-sexism-gender-metoo &quot;Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'This could be the beginning of a revolution'&quot;] ''The Guardian'' (April 28, 2018) 

* Because we write fiction we mine our souls. Of course you put yourself into your fiction, your fiction is you.
**On the connection between the personal and fictional world in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/apr/28/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-feminism-racism-sexism-gender-metoo &quot;Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'This could be the beginning of a revolution'&quot;] ''The Guardian'' (April 28, 2018)

* This is the kind of capitalism I hate. This is bullying capitalism. Look, I am Igbo, I come from a trading culture. My people are merchant and I'm all for buying and selling. But capitalism has to be a fair exchange.
** &quot;[https://www.theparisreview.org/blog/2019/01/28/is-there-anything-else-i-can-help-you-with-today/ &quot;Is There Anything Else I Can Help You with Today?&quot; ''Paris Review''] (28 January 2019)

{{anchor|bbcfeminism}}
* [[Feminism]] is not that [[men]] and [[women]] are the same. If men and women are the same, we won't have sexism. We are just stating the differences and people should stop giving negative value to all the attributes that women have. It's not that men and women are the same but they've equally human.
**'''[https://www.bbc.com/news/av/entertainment-arts-59568638 Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: &quot;I want to say what I think&quot;]''' (9 December 2021)

* We teach [[w:Girls|girls]] to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls, you can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful, but not too successful. Otherwise, you would threaten the [[w:Man|man]]. Because I am female, I am expected to aspire to marriage. I am expected to make my life choices always keeping in mind that marriage is the most important. Now marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support but why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage and we don’t teach boys the same? We raise girls to see each other as competitors not for jobs or accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing, but for the attention of men.

* I think you travel to search and you come back home to find yourself there.

* The only reason you say that race was not an issue is because you wish it was not. We all wish it was not. But it’s a lie. I came from a country where race was not an issue; I did not think of myself as black and I only became black when I came to [[w:America|America]]. When you are black in America and you fall in love with a white person, race doesn’t matter when you’re alone together because it’s just you and your love. But the minute you step outside, race matters. But we don’t talk about it. We don’t even tell our white partners the small things that piss us off and the things we wish they understood better, because we’re worried they will say we’re overreacting, or we’re being too sensitive. And we don’t want them to say, Look how far we’ve come, just forty years ago it would have been illegal for us to even be a couple blah blah blah, because you know what we’re thinking when they say that? We’re thinking why the fuck should it ever have been illegal anyway? But we don’t say any of this stuff. We let it pile up inside our heads and when we come to nice liberal dinners like this, we say that race doesn’t matter because that’s what we’re supposed to say, to keep our nice liberal friends comfortable. 
**[http://globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change &quot;It’s true. I speak from experience&quot;]

*Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture.
** [https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_we_should_all_be_feminists#t-1300116 &quot;We should all be feminists&quot;] During a Ted Talk in the United Kingdom at TedxEuston,2012. 

* There are many social-media-savvy people who are choking on sanctimony and lacking in compassion, who can fluidly pontificate on Twitter about kindness but are unable to actually show kindness. People whose social media lives are case studies in emotional aridity. People for whom friendship, and its expectations of loyalty and compassion and support, no longer matter. People who claim to love literature – the messy stories of our humanity – but are also monomaniacally obsessed with whatever is the prevailing ideological orthodoxy. People who demand that you denounce your friends for flimsy reasons in order to remain a member of the chosen puritan class.
** Quote extracted from  'It is Obscene: A True Reflection in Three Parts' [https://www.chimamanda.com/news_items/it-is-obscene-a-true-reflection-in-three-parts/]

*(Which writers — novelists, playwrights, critics, journalists, poets — working today do you admire most?) [[w:Tash Aw|Tash Aw]], [[w:Niq Mhlongo|Niq Mhlongo]], [[w:Rachel Seiffert|Rachel Seiffert]], [[Mary Gaitskill]], [[w:David Szalay|David Szalay]], [[Leila Aboulela]], [[Dave Eggers]], [[w:Tracy K. Smith|Tracy K. Smith]], [[w:Tessa Hadley|Tessa Hadley]], [[w:Richard Flanagan|Richard Flanagan]], [[w:Claire Messud|Claire Messud]], [[w:James Lasdun|James Lasdun]], [[Ta-Nehisi Coates]], [[Vivian Gornick]], the late [[Bharati Mukherjee]], [[w:Deborah Levy|Deborah Levy]], [[w:John Gregory Brown|John Gregory Brown]], [[Amit Chaudhuri]], [[Nawal El Saadawi]], [[w:Margo Jefferson|Margo Jefferson]], [[Jesmyn Ward]], [[Lynn Nottage]], [[w:Janet Malcolm|Janet Malcolm]], [[Jamaica Kincaid]], [[Alice Walker]], [[w:Peter Orner|Peter Orner]], [[w:Susan Orlean|Susan Orlean]].
**[https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/23/books/review/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-by-the-book-interview.html &quot;What the Novelist Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Reads While She Works&quot;] ''The New York Times'' (23 April 2020)

=== ''[[w: Americanah|Americanah]]'' (2013) ===
* Why did people ask &quot;What is it about?&quot; as if a novel had to be about only one thing.
* Race doesn't really exist for you because it has never been a barrier. Black folks don't have that choice.
* When it comes to dressing well, American culture is so self-fulfilled that it has not only disregarded this courtesy of self-presentation, but has turned that disregard into a virtue. &quot;We are too superior/busy/cool/not-uptight to bother about how we look to other people, and so we can wear pajamas to school and underwear to the mall.&quot;
* If you’re telling a non-black person about something racist that happened to you, make sure you are not bitter. Don’t complain. Be forgiving. If possible, make it funny. Most of all, do not be angry. Black people are not supposed to be angry about racism. Otherwise you get no sympathy. This applies only for white liberals, by the way. Don’t even bother telling a white conservative about anything racist that happened to you. Because the conservative will tell you that YOU are the real racist and your mouth will hang open in confusion.
* I'm chasing you. I'm going to chase you until you give this a chance.
* They never said “I don’t know.” They said, instead, “I’m not sure,” which did not give any information but still suggested the possibility of knowledge.
* She liked that [Obinze] wore their relationship so boldly, like a brightly colored shirt. Sometimes she worried that she was too happy. She would sink into moodiness, and snap at Obinze, or be distant. And her joy would become a restless thing, flapping its wings inside her, as though looking for an opening to fly away.
* She rested her head against his and felt, for the first time, what she would often feel with him: a self-affection. He made her like herself. 
* With him, she was at ease: her skin felt as though it was her right size. She told him how she very much wanted God to exist but feared He did not, how she worried that she should know what she wanted to do with her life but did not even know what she wanted to study at university. It seemed so natural, to talk to him about odd things. She had never done that before. The trust, so sudden and yet so complete, and the intimacy, frightened her.

=== ''[[w:Purple Hibiscus|Purple Hibiscus]]'' (2003) ===
*&quot;Being defiant can be a good thing sometimes,&quot; Aunty Ifeoma said. &quot;Defiance is like marijuana - it is not a bad thing when it is used right.&quot;

*&quot;I cannot control even the dreams that I have made.&quot;

*&quot;People have crushes on priests all the time, you know. It’s exciting to have to deal with God as a rival.&quot;

*&quot;The white missionaries brought us their god,” Amaka was saying. “Which was the same color as them, worshiped in their language and packaged in the boxes they made. Now that we take their god back to them, shouldn’t we at least repackage it?&quot;

*&quot;Eugene has to stop doing God's job. God is big enough to do his own job. If God will judge our father for choosing to follow the way of our ancestors, then let God do the judging, not Eugene.&quot;

*&quot;There was a helplessness to his joy, the same kind of helplessness as in that woman’s despair.&quot;
*Things started to fall apart when my brother, Jaja, did not go to communion and Papa flung his heavy missal across the room and broke the figurines on the étagère.

*(Page 1)
*I meant to say I am sorry that Papa broke your figurines, but the words that came out were, ‘I’m sorry your figurines broke, Mama.’

*( Page 10)
*Imagine what the Standard would be if we were all quiet.’

*It was a joke. Ade Coker was laughing; so was his wife, Yewande. But Papa did not laugh. Jaja and I turned and went back upstairs, silently.

*( Page 58)
*I looked at Jaja and wondered if the dimness in his eyes was shame. I suddenly wished, for him, that he had done the ima mmuo, the initiation into the spirit world. I knew very little about it; women were not supposed to know anything at all, since it was the first step toward the initiation to manhood. But Jaja once told me that he heard that boys were flogged and made to bathe in the presence of a taunting crowd. The only time Papa had talked about the ima mmuo was to say that the Christians who let their sons do it were confused, that they would end up in hellfire.

*(Page 87)
*I thought the Igwe was supposed to stay at his place and receive guests. I didn’t know he visits people’s homes,’ Amaka said, as we went downstairs. ‘I guess that’s because your father is a Big Man.’

I wished she had said ‘Uncle Eugene’ instead of ‘your father.’ She did not even look at me as she spoke. I felt, looking at her, that I was helplessly watching precious flaxen sand slip away between my fingers.

*( Page 93)
*When she made a U-turn and went back the way we had come, I let my mind drift, imagining God laying out the hills of Nsukka with his wide white hands, crescent-moon shadows underneath his nails just like Father Benedict’s.

 *(Page 131)
*Morality, as well as the sense of taste, is relative.’

( Page 156)
*This cannot go on, nwunye m,’ Aunty Ifeoma said. ‘When a house is on fire, you run out before the roof collapses on your head.’

*(Page 213)
*Rain splashed across the floor of the veranda, even though the sun blazed and I had to narrow my eyes to look out the door of Aunty Ifeoma’s living room. Mama used to tell Jaja and me that God was undecided about what to send, rain or sun. We would sit in our rooms and look out at the raindrops glinting with sunlight, waiting for God to decide.

*(Page 217)
*She picked up an enterprising snail that was crawling out of the open basket. She threw it back in and muttered, ‘God take power from the devil.’ I wondered if it was the same snail, crawling out, being thrown back in, and then crawling out again. Determined. I wanted to buy the whole basket and set that one snail free.

*( Page 238)
*That night when I bathed, with a bucket half full of rainwater, I did not scrub my left hand, the hand that Father Amadi had held gently to slide the flower off my finger. I did not heat the water, either, because I was afraid that the heating coil would make the rainwater lose the scent of the sky. I sang as I bathed. There were more earthworms in the bathtub, and I left them alone, watching the water carry them and send them down the drain.

*(Page 269-270)
*Kambili is right,’ she said. ‘Something from God was happening there.’

*(Page 275)
*Of course God does. Look at what He did to his faithful servant Job, even to His own Son. But have you ever wondered why? Why did He have to murder his own son so we would be saved? Why didn’t he just go ahead and save us?'

*(Page 289)
*We will take Jaja to Nsukka first, and then we’ll go to America to visit Aunty Ifeoma,’ I said. ‘We’ll plant new orange trees in Abba when we come back, and Jaja will plant purple hibiscus, too, and I’ll plant ixora so we can suck the juices of the flowers.’ I am laughing. I reach out and place my arm around Mama’s shoulder and she leans toward me and smiles.

Above, clouds like dyed cotton wool hang low, so low I feel I can reach out and squeeze the moisture from them. The new rains will come down soon.

*(Page 306-307)
*Things started to fall apart at home.”

*(Page 3)
*A love sip, he called it, because you shared the little things you loved with the people you loved […] The tea was always too hot, always burned my tongue.” 

*(Page 8)
*Jaja’s defiance seems like Ifeoma’s experimental purple hibiscus: rare, fragrant with the undertones of freedom, a different kind of freedom from the one the crowds waving green leaves chanted at Government Square after the coup. A freedom to be, to do.” 

*(Page 16)

=== ''[[w: Half of a yellow sun|Half of a yellow sun]]'' (2006) ===
*&quot;Then she wished, more rationally, that she could love him without needing him. Need gave him power without his trying; need was the choicelessness she often felt around him.&quot;

*&quot;This was love: a string of coincidences that gathered significance and became miracles&quot;

*&quot;Is love this misguided need to have you beside me most of the time? Is love this safety I feel in our silences? Is it this belonging, this completeness?&quot;
*&quot;...my point is that the only authentic identity for the African is the tribe...I am Nigerian because a white man created Nigeria and gave me that identity. I am black because the white man constructed black to be as different as possible from his white. But I was Igbo before the white man came.&quot;

*&quot;The truth has become an insult.&quot;

*&quot;This is our world, although the people who drew this map decided to put their own land on top of ours. There is no top or bottom, you see.&quot;

*&quot;There are some things that are so unforgivable that they make other things easily forgivable.&quot;

*&quot;A gorgeous pitless account of love, violence and betrayal.&quot;

*&quot;Greatness depends on where you are coming from.&quot;

*“...my point is that the only authentic identity for the African is the tribe...I am Nigerian because a white man created Nigeria and gave me that identity. I am black because the white man constructed black to be as different as possible from his white. But I was Igbo before the white man came.”

===''The Best Short Stories'' (2021) ===

*&quot;I look to stories for consolation,the kind of small consolation that one needs to want to wake up everyday;as template for life;for news on how others live;for reminders that life's mysteries have no key&quot;
* &quot;A successful story for me exist in a moral universe, not one where goodness always triumph, because that would be false but one with an inherent awareness of goodness&quot; 
** 
[https://www.instagram.com/p/CV2h2BKKhl0/?utm_medium=copy_link]

===''On Gender''===
*&quot;My own definition is a feminist is a man or woman who says 'yes,there's a problem with gender as it is today and we must fix it,we must do better.All of us,women and men,must do better.&quot;[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/] chimamanda quote based on gender. 

*&quot;Marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support but why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage and we don’t teach boys the same? We raise girls to see each other as competitors not for jobs or accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing, but for the attention of men. We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way that boys are.”[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

*“Of course I am not worried about intimidating men. The type of man who will be intimidated by me is exactly the type of man I have no interest in.”[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

*“The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations.”[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

*“Show a people as one thing, only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become.”[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

*&quot;So true--when people see an absence of women in engineering, science and technology, then it becomes self-reinforcing.&quot;[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

*“Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture.”[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

===''On Perception''===

*&quot;The single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.&quot;[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

*&quot;Many stories matter. Stories that have been used to dispossess and to malign.But stories can also be used to empower,and to humanize.Stories can break the dignity of a people.But stories can also repair that broken dignity&quot;[https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/15-quotes-from-chimamanda-adichie-that-have-change/]

===''On Money and wealth''===

* &quot;Creative writing programmes are not very necessary. They just exist so that people like us can make a living.&quot; [https://sheleadsafrica.org/20-powerful-chimamanda-adichie-quotes-for-todays-boss-women/]

*&quot;How can we resist exploitation if we don’t have the tools to understand exploitation. Which of your favourite quotes by Chimamanda did we miss?&quot;[https://sheleadsafrica.org/20-powerful-chimamanda-adichie-quotes-for-todays-boss-women/]

*&quot;There are many different ways to be poor in the world but increasingly there seems to be one single way to be rich.&quot;[https://sheleadsafrica.org/20-powerful-chimamanda-adichie-quotes-for-todays-boss-women/]

===''On Men, Love and Relationship''===
*Marriage can be a good thing, a source of joy, love, and mutual support. But why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage, but we don’t teach boys to do the same? [https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/7453838-marriage-can-be-a-good-thing-a-source-of-joy]
*
*
*
*&quot;Masculinity is a hard, small cage, and we put boys inside this cage.&quot;[https://sheleadsafrica.org/20-powerful-chimamanda-adichie-quotes-for-todays-boss-women/]

*&quot;Of course I am not worried about intimating men. The type of man who will be intimidated is exactly the type of man I have no interest in.&quot;[https://sheleadsafrica.org/20-powerful-chimamanda-adichie-quotes-for-todays-boss-women/]

*&quot;Please love by giving and by taking. Give and be given. If you are only giving and not taking, you’ll know. You’ll know from that small and true voice inside you that we females are so often socialized to silence. Don’t silence that voice. Dare to take.&quot;[https://sheleadsafrica.org/20-powerful-chimamanda-adichie-quotes-for-todays-boss-women/]

*trans women are trans women
**[https://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/top-news/476561-chimamanda-adichie-speaks-at-south-african-university-after-boycott-balls-from-students-council.html] Chimamanda responding to a question about whether she considers trans women as real women.

===''Chinasa''===
*&quot;And even though I helped to clean the wounded, I had never taken anyone into my room.But I took this girl into my room.Her name was chinasa.&quot;[https://campaignforeducation.org/en/]

*I think you travel to search and you come back home to find yourself there.

=== ''[[w:We Should All Be Feminists|We Should All Be Feminists]]'' (2014)===
* You hate men, you hate bras, you hate African culture, you think women should always be in charge, you don’t wear makeup, you don’t shave, you’re always angry, you don’t have a sense of humor, you don’t use deodorant.
** Page 11

* I often make the mistake of thinking that something that is obvious to me is just as obvious to everyone else.
** Page 13

* We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much.
** Page 17-18

=== ''[[w:The Thing Around Your Neck|The Thing Around Your Neck]]'' (2009) ===
* The trick was to understand America, to know that America was give-and-take. You gave up a lot but you gained a lot, too.
** Page 198

=== ''[[w:Zikora|Zikora]]'' (2020) ===
* It was something like pain and different from pain.
** Page 2

* Bear it, that is what it means to be a woman...
** Page 2

*If he was going to have a child, of course he should have a say, but how much of a say, since the body was mine, since in creating a child, Nature demanded so much of the woman and so little of the man.

*I read somewhere that love was about this, the nuggets of knowledge about our beloved that we so fluently hold

*You can’t nice your way to being loved.

*Some kindnesses you do not ever forget. You carry them to your grave, held warmly somewhere, brought up and savored from time to time.

*How you imagine something will be is always worse than how it actually ends up being,

*I looked at my mother, standing by the window. How had I never really seen her? It was my father who destroyed, and it was my mother I blamed for the ruins left behind.

*The frequent flare of sad longing.

*I felt translucent, so fragile that one more rejection would make me come fully undone.

*Tears were so cheap now 

*Nature must not want humans to reproduce, otherwise birthing would be easy, even enjoyable:

*They learned instead from mainstream pornography, where women were always shaved smooth and never had periods, and so they became men who thought the contrived histrionics onscreen were How Things Were Done.

*Something was growing inside me, alien, uninvited, and it felt like an infestation.

*He would kill you, but he would do it slowly

*I felt ragged and hopeless, high on my desperation. I had already ripped up my dignity, so I might as well scatter the pieces.

* &quot;I think I should leave. Is that okay?” he asked as though he needed my permission to abandon me. He would kill you, but he would do it courteously.

*I just want them to know I can handle it, I can do it alone,” I said. “Some of us have men and are still doing it alone,” Mmiliaku said. She could have gloated. She could have asked, “Isn’t this the perfect man you won by deciding not to settle?” She could have been passive aggressive, or resentful, or lectured me in that world-weary way of a woman who believed that men would be men. But she didn’t, and so with the light streaming through my apartment window, I began to weep because my cousin had grace and I lacked grace.

*Nature demanded so much of the woman and so little of the man

*Some days I was fine and some days I was under water, barely breathing 

*It felt like the Old Testament. A plague. A primitive wind blowing at will, evil but purposelessly so, an overcoming in my body that didn’t need to be.

*Love was about this, the nuggets of knowledge about our beloved that we so fluently hold.

*When I had severe cramps as a teenager, she would say, “Bear it, that is what it means to be a woman,” and it was years before I knew that girls took Buscopan for period pain.

*sifted through my memories, as though through debris, trying to find a reason.

*my dark day further darkened.

*for a moment I felt an intense desire to pass out and escape my life

*was suspended in a place of no feeling, 

*The labor and delivery ward needed to have a false eye-lash policy

*What did “It’s time to get married” mean, anyway? Why did she have to marry at all?

*What was “normal”? That Nature traded in unnecessary pain? It wasn’t his intestines being set on fire, after all.

*He rolled his eyes in a kind of disbelieving amusement. “What, the single friend will seduce the husband, or the single friend will make the wife want to be single again?

*I made myself boneless and amenable. I spent weekends willing the landline next to my bed to ring. Often it didn’t. Then he would call, before midnight, to ask if I was still up, so he could visit and leave before dawn.

* Each morning, I coated concealer on the dark bags under my eyes. Most days, I caressed a bottle of Advil, longing for the translucent green pills, but knowing that I would never take them.

*I didn’t question whether it was real, because I knew it was. I questioned where it had gone. How could emotions just change? Where did it go, the thing that used to be?

*I believed then that love had to feel like hunger to be true. 

*I began to cry. Tears were so cheap now. How do some memories insist on themselves?

*Ours was an ancient story, the woman wants the baby and the man doesn’t want the baby and a middle ground does not exist.

*I knew how I was supposed to feel, but I did not know how I felt. It was not transcendental. There was a festering red pain between my legs. Somewhere in my consciousness, a mild triumph hovered, because it was over, finally it was over, and I had pushed out the baby. So animalistic, so violent—the push and pressure, the blood, the doctor urging me, the cranking and stretching of flesh and organ and bone.

*We scrub and scrape our armpits and upper lip and legs because we hate to have hair there. Then we pamper and treat the hair on our heads because we love hair there. But it’s all hair. It’s the wanting that makes the difference.

*Zikky, it won’t be easy, but it won’t be as hard as you think. How you imagine something will be is always worse than how it actually ends up being,

*We mostly spoke English; Igbo was for mimicking relatives and for saying painful things.

*He grew up with his dreams already dreamt for him 

*Respect: a starched deference, a string of ashen rituals. It was my mother who sat beside my father at weddings and ceremonies; it was her photo that appeared above the label of “wife” in the booklet his club published in his honor. Respect was her reward for acquiescing.

*He said, “I thought you let me because you had protection.” I said, “What are you talking about? You know I stopped taking the pill because it made me fat, and I assumed you knew what it meant, what it could mean.” He said, “There was miscommunication.

*In my head, there was a queue of emotions I could not name, wanting to be tried out one after the other.

*A geyser of anxiety had erupted deep inside me and I was spurting fear.

*Only later did I see how, to survive, she wielded her niceness like a subtle sharp knife.

*was to remember like a brief blur my life as it once was, when I was only a daughter, not a mother.

*My father told jokes and laughed and charmed everyone, and broke things and walked on the shards without knowing he had broken things.

*I felt light from relief, weightless, unburdened.

*How swift the moment is when your life becomes a different life.

*Symptoms can mean nothing if a mind just cannot.

*And I never told the boy who didn’t love me, the boy I was trying to make love me when I didn’t yet know that you cannot nice your way into being loved.

*Her silence bruised the air between us.

*A fog blanketed me, a kind of deadness. I didn’t cry; crying seemed too ordinary for this moment.

=== ''[[w:Notes on Grief|Notes on Grief]]'' (2021) ===
* Grief is a cruel kind of education. You learn how ungentle mourning can be, how full of anger. You learn how glib condolences can feel. You learn how much grief is about language, the failure of language and the grasping for language.

* I finally understand why people get tattoos of those they have lost. The need to proclaim not merely the loss but the love, the continuity. I am my father’s daughter. It is an act of resistance and refusal: grief telling you it is over and your heart saying it is not; grief trying to shrink your love to the past and your heart saying it is present.

* For the rest of my life, I will live with my hands outstretched for things that are no longer there.

* How is it that the world keeps going, breathing in and out unchanged, while in my soul there is a permanent scattering?

* It does not matter whether I want to be changed, because I am changed.

* Age is irrelevant in grief; at issue is not how old he was but how loved.
* “I have always longed to be known, truly known by another human being.”
** [https://www.kwit.org/2025-03-04/celebrated-author-chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-i-have-always-longed-to-be-known? Celebrated author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'I have always longed to be known'] kwit.org ( March 4, 2025)
*“Women in general are more likely to have richer interior lives and are also socialized to just sort of embrace more complexity emotionally.”
**[https://www.kwit.org/2025-03-04/celebrated-author-chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-i-have-always-longed-to-be-known? Celebrated author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'I have always longed to be known'] kwit.org ( March 4, 2025 )
*“Writing fiction is the love of my life. It's the thing that I think gives me meaning.”
**[https://www.wypr.org/wypr-arts/2025-03-04/celebrated-author-chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-i-have-always-longed-to-be-known? Celebrated author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: 'I have always longed to be known'] YPR+ ( March 4, 2025)
*“I’ve always been willing to take the consequences of speaking my mind. ... No, no, no. I said what I believe.”
**[https://globalupfront.com/2025/03/02/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-ive-always-been-willing-to-take-the-consequences-of-speaking-my-mind/? Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: ‘I’ve Always Been Willing To Take The Consequences Of Speaking My Mind’] Global upfront newspaper (March 2, 2025)
*“Social media has reshaped the traditional power dynamic by giving some access to the powerless, it has also made it easy to mistake the loudest voices for the truest.”
**[https://globalupfront.com/2025/03/02/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-ive-always-been-willing-to-take-the-consequences-of-speaking-my-mind/? Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: ‘I’ve Always Been Willing To Take The Consequences Of Speaking My Mind’] Global upfront newspaper (March 2, 2025)
*“If you don’t understand, ask questions. If you’re uncomfortable about asking questions, say you are uncomfortable about asking questions and then ask anyway. It’s easy to tell when a question is coming from a good place. Then listen some more.”
**[https://guardian.ng/life/life-features/happy-birthday-chimamanda-adichie-powerful-quotes-from-the-bestselling-author/? Happy Birthday Chimamanda Adichie: Powerful Quotes From The Bestselling Author] The guardian(15 Sep 2018)
*“There are two answers to the things they will teach you about our land: the real answer and the answer you give in school to pass. You must read books and learn both answers.” 
**[https://guardian.ng/life/life-features/happy-birthday-chimamanda-adichie-powerful-quotes-from-the-bestselling-author/? Happy Birthday Chimamanda Adichie: Powerful Quotes From The Bestselling Author] The guardian(15 Sep 2018)
*“Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture.”
**[https://guardian.ng/life/life-features/happy-birthday-chimamanda-adichie-powerful-quotes-from-the-bestselling-author/? Happy Birthday Chimamanda Adichie: Powerful Quotes From The Bestselling Author] The guardian(15 Sep 2018)
*“We do a great disservice to boys in how we raise them. We stifle the humanity of boys. We define masculinity in a very narrow way. Masculinity is a hard, small cage, and we put boys inside this cage.”
**[https://guardian.ng/life/life-features/happy-birthday-chimamanda-adichie-powerful-quotes-from-the-bestselling-author/? Happy Birthday Chimamanda Adichie: Powerful Quotes From The Bestselling Author] The guardian(15 Sep 2018)
*“I feel that I have been fortunate to have found success, and I also want the young writers to have what I did not have when I was starting out my writing career … Writing doesn’t exist in a vacuum; we talk about politics, everything.”
**'''[https://guardian.ng/guardian-woman/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/? More on Guardian Woman]''' '''TheGuardian''' 
*“Feminism for me is about justice; it’s about the idea that all human beings are equal… Feminism just means equality of opportunity.”
**'''[https://guardian.ng/guardian-woman/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/? More on Guardian Woman]''' '''TheGuardian''' 
*“I am not apologetic for being a Nigerian. I won’t apologise for it; it’s who and what I am.”
**'''[https://guardian.ng/guardian-woman/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/? More on Guardian Woman]''' '''TheGuardian''' 
**&quot;The single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.&quot; 
**https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story 

* I think it’s important. Just reading the entries for my workshop—sometimes it’s very sad to see that people don’t know very much about their own writers. I’m reading the entries now—it’s depressing. I know people in Nigeria who say, “I don’t read Nigerian fiction”—and they say it with prid
**[https://kenyonreview.org/conversation/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/ An interview with Chimamnda Ngozi Adichie]

*It’s true everywhere. In Nigeria, people ask what can we do to make people read like they do abroad. I tell them, it’s a problem everywhere. When I was in graduate school at Johns Hopkins University and taught freshman writing, students just didn’t read. I would ask what are you reading, and they’d say Catcher in the Rye or something they had to read for school. When I asked what do you read for fun, they would be blank.
**[https://kenyonreview.org/conversation/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/ An interview with Chimamnda Ngozi Adichie]

*The year was interesting, and I met very lovely people. I was grateful for the library, but the program was not right for me. It took doing an academic program to make me realize that. I felt strait-jacketed, not very connected to the real world in many ways. I respect academic programs, but they are not for me.
**[https://kenyonreview.org/conversation/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/ An interview with Chimamnda Ngozi Adichie]

*No , most are set in the U.S.—except for “Cell One” and “The Headstrong Historian.” I’ve written quite a bit about Nigerians in the U.S. When I set out to write about America, I didn’t feel called to do a novel. I like stories, the kind of prose that is in touch with poetry.
**[https://kenyonreview.org/conversation/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie/ An interview with Chimamnda Ngozi Adichie]

==Quotes about Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie==
*(Whose writing today most inspires you?) Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s work — both fiction and nonfiction...

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commons category|Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie}}
*[http://uzomediangr.com/tag/chimamanda-ngozi-adichie-quotes List of  A-Z quotes from Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie - Uzomedia]
*[https://www.gradesaver.com/purple-hibiscus/study-guide/quotesPurple Hibiscus]
*[https://www.supersummary.com/purple-hibiscus/important-quotes/Purple Hibiscus]
{{DEFAULTSORT:Adichie, Chimamanda Ngozi}}
[[Category:1977 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Women academics from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Catholics from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Essayists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Playwrights from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Poets from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Short story writers from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Educators from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Feminists]]
[[Category:MacArthur Fellows]]
[[Category:Women authors from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Women born in the 1970s]]
[[Category:Women activists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Yale University alumni]]
[[Category:Johns Hopkins University alumni]]
[[Category:Shorty Award winners]]</text>
      <sha1>3vyag29vgkvshzv8toq53c2fsa7mar9</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>197163</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965077</id>
      <parentid>3955555</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:54:01Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Undid revision [[Special:Diff/3955555|3955555]] by [[Special:Contributions/~2026-36328-89|~2026-36328-89]] ([[User talk:~2026-36328-89|talk]])</comment>
      <origin>3965077</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="103695" sha1="4xeh453cm1c6xea0t7b859qe9kltori" xml:space="preserve">{{cleanup}}
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes}}''''', also referred to as '''''Lakewood Plaza Turbo: OK K.O.!''''', '''''OK K.O.!''''', '''''Lakewood Plaza Turbo''''' or '''''Let's Be Heroes''''' for short, is an American superhero animated comedy television series created by [[w:Ian_Jones-Quartey|Ian Jones-Quartey]] and based on the webcomic ''RPG World''. It follows titular character, K.O., and his efforts to become the world's greatest hero, while working at Gar's Bodega (run by the no-nonsense Mr. Gar), a hero supply shop in a strip mall known as Lakewood Plaza Turbo. Alongside him are his best friends and co-workers Radicles, an apathetic, narcissistic alien, and Enid, a level-headed, big-sister-like ninja witch, as well as other heroes who work at and frequent a computer planet called RPG World.

== Pilot: Lakewood Plaza Turbo ==

== [[OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes (Season 1)|Season 1]] ==
===''Let's Be Heroes'' [1.01]===
''[Rad and K.O. meet for the first time and Rad is serving K.O. some lightning nachos.]''
:'''Rad''': So, you're choosing the path of the hero, huh? I'm pretty heroic myself. Level 2, if you must know. ''[eats a chip; gets shocked by electricity]''
:'''K.O.''': Well, anyway, thanks for your help, Rad. I better check out--
:'''Rad''': Oh, so you need photographic evidence of my righteous feats?
:'''K.O.''': Not now. I believe you--
:'''Rad''': If you insist. ''[shows photos on his phone]'' Here's one of me doing my famous power belly flop on a bad guy. And here's me getting the drop on ''the'' Chip Damage. Don't worry, we're cool now. ''[accidentally shows a photo of a kitten]'' And here's me--
:'''K.O.''': Aww. Who's the kitty?
:'''Rad''': Aah! ''[embarrassed]'' Uh, uh, she's nobody! It's nothing! 
''[Rad exits, racing away.]''
:'''K.O.''': What a cool guy.
----
''[An alarm goes off in the plaza, signaling the arrival of a Boxmore robot. The bodega shuts down. The doors crush one of the posters Brandon is setting up.]''
:'''Brandon''': Hey! Aw, man. It took me like an hour to paint that. This better not be another one of Gar's drills.
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Nah, those are Tuesdays. It's got to be a Boxman bot. Want to help me shoot the chaos?
''[A magic portal opens in the sky, as a Boxmore Box falls from it. The box hits the pavement, and the walls collapse to reveal a robot.]''
:'''Darrell''': I am Darrell, and I've come to destroy! ''[Starts shooting lasers, laughs maniacally.]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[waving]'' Hi Darrell, I'm K.O.! Nice to--  ''[Ducks, dodging one of Darrell's lasers.]''
''[Several people run away from Darrell's lasers.]''
:'''Darrell''': That's right! Run away, Lakewood Losers!
''[The bodega's doorbell rings as Rad and Enid exit the store.]''
:'''Rad''': (sighs) Another Boxman robot.
:'''Enid''': K.O. don't wave at him, he's evil...and a total nerd.
:'''K.O.''': Evil? I have to do something!
:'''Enid''': Whoa, hold up, you don't stand a chance against that thing.
:'''Rad''': I think he's got it.
:'''Enid''': What, you think K.O. can beat him?
:'''Rad''': Oh. Oh, no, no, no. I meant ''Darrell's'' got it. (chuckles) That kid's gonna get wrecked.
:'''K.O.''': Ha! Don't let appearances fool you. Witness the power of a true hero! ''[Jumps up into the sky.]''
:'''Darrell''': What the? ''[Spikes appear on his knuckles, as he goes in for a punch.]''
:'''K.O.''': Aah!
''[K.O. and Darrell's fists collide.]''
:'''Darrell''': (chuckles) Not bad! Where'd you get those sweet threads? The convenience store?
:'''K.O.''': Yes! In fact, I did. And I got this, too! ''[Pulls out the laser sword.]''
''[K.O. runs towards Darrell, dodging his laser beams. K.O. jumps up and cuts Darrell's arm off with a laser from the sword.]''
:'''Darrell''': Aah! No way!
:'''K.O.''': You were wrong to underestimate the power of a hero, Darrell. ''[Runs up and headbutts Darrell.]''
''[Darrell skids across the pavement.]''
:'''K.O.''': And now you're really going to get it! ''[Throws off his cape.]''
:'''Darrell''': ''[Groans, as K.O.'s cape land on him. He pulls the cape off.]'' Give it up already!
:'''K.O.''': I'll never give up, I can feel the willpower of everyone in the plaza coursing through me! ''[K.O.'s flame gauntlets activate.]'' Enough power for one final move! Get ready to feel 10,000 strikes of sweet justice, Darrell!
''[Darrell begins to tremble in fear.]''
:'''K.O.''': Ultra-flaming-evil-pulverizing-punch! Ha!
''[The scene intercuts with K.O. landing punches on Darrell and K.O. embedded in a wall.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Kid. Hey, kid. Snap out of it. Come on, kid. ''[Begins lightly smacking K.O. across the face.]'' Kid, come on. Kid?
:'''K.O.''': ''[Shakes his head, mumbling as he wakes up.]'' What-- What happened?
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Geez, where do I start with this? Well, okay. See that robot over there with the cannon and the big fist? ''[Points to Darrell.]'' Well, first, you tried to block his punch. But he just knocked your flame gauntlets in your face, which knocked you out. As you fell back, you tripped over your beach towel, and fell butt-first into your lightning nachos which shocked you backwards into this here wall. Actually pretty funny.
:'''K.O.''': ''[Blushing]'' Th-That's what really happened?
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': I recorded the whole thing if you want to check it out.
''[The phone begins to play sounds of K.O. screaming and grunting, followed by splattering sounds. K.O. screams some more, and whirling sounds play.]''
:'''K.O.''': I can't believe it... ''[He sinks to the ground.]'' That fight felt so intense, but it wasn't real, just like my big dream. I thought I'd already become a hero, but all I did was wear stuff and get my butt kicked. Who am I kidding I'm not even close to being there yet...
:'''Enid''': ''[Shaking Rad, trying to wake him up.]'' Get off the ground, you stupid meatloaf.
''[A whistle is heard in the distance, and it is revealed to be Gar that was whistling.]''
:'''Enid''': Ha!
:'''Darrell''': What the?
:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[He drops down on Darrell from the sky, causing an explosion, decapitating Darrell.]'' Hmm. ''[He kicks Darrell's head toward Boxman's factory.]''
:'''Darrell''': Aah!
''[The crosswalk sign turns green, and gives off a ding.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': You two, get this mess cleaned up.
:'''Rad and Enid''': Yes, sir!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Mondays, am I right? ''[Walks off.]''
:'''Rad''': Man, Mr. Gar's pretty cool, but, like, how'd he even get up there?
:'''Enid''': He's level eleven, dude, now come on.

===''Let's Be Friends'' [1.02]===
:'''K.O.''': (Thinking) ''Man, Rad and Enid are on another level. I wanna work with them so bad, but I can't even do a cool power move. I can't give up. There must be some way I could convince them to give me another chance. Maybe if I brought them a giant cake, or if I let them hold my rarest Pow cards. Maybe if I wore a baseball cap backwards.'' ''[He pictures these scenarios in the clouds]''
''[Shannon appears before him with a poor disguise.]''
:'''Shannon''': Excuse me. I couldn't help but notice your unemployment. You know these days if you wanna work at a place like Gar's, you gotta do something really special.
:'''K.O.''': (Disappointed) A résumé.
:'''Shannon''': No, no, no, no. I'm talking something like... infiltrating Lord Boxman's lair and maybe, like, defeating him all by yourself.
:'''K.O.''': That's a good idea, so good that Rad and Enid will have to hire me and be my friends. ''[runs towards Boxmore]'' Thanks for the help, ominous stranger! You're the best!
:'''Shannon''': Ch'yeah, obviously. (laughs evilly)

===''You're Everybody's Sidekick'' [1.03]===
''[It's K.O.'s first day working at Gar's Bodega and he excitedly reports to Enid.]''
:'''K.O.''': Helper K.O., reporting for duty!
:'''Enid''': (chuckles) At ease, soldier. Helper K.O.! Your first mission... ''[K.O.'s eyes widen]'' here at Gar's is to...clean up the store. ''[Enid points to the closet full of cleaning equipment, with a sign on top that says &quot;8 WAYS OF CLEANSING&quot;]''
:'''K.O.''': Wow! The ancient tools of the cleaning the floor! ''[K.O. stares in awe]''  
:'''Enid''': Now go! And save the bodega from the forces of dirt or something. ''[K.O. dashes off and suits up in an armor of cleaning supplies.]''
:'''K.O.''': Dirt, today you breathe your last filthy breath! I swear on the honor of the bodega, I will vanquish you! 
''[K.O. speeds through sweeping and cleaning through the aisle. Enid watches as Ginger appears at her desk.]'' 
:'''Ginger''': Dearie, can I pay for this in thousands of pennies? 
''[Not wanting to answer the customer, Enid disappears and a log takes her place.]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs mischievously) Enid, Enid, Enid! All done! Anything else I can help you with? 
:'''Enid''': Hmm. Ah! Sort through this penny dish... ''[pushes the penny dish to K.O.]'' and take out everything that isn't a penny. ''[K.O. looks inside the dish and sees a pen, a baseball, a throwing star, a teapot, and and onion with a face. He gasps and starts picking out things.]'' Boy, you sure love helping people, don't ya buddy? 
:'''K.O.''': Well, sure! It's my job. And isn't that how everyone feels? 
:'''Enid''': ''[with a quizzical expression]'' Help people...? Nope, not for me. Too much work, too little payoff. I'm good with just helping myself. 
''[K.O. looks down for a moment before standing up and inhales deeply.]'' 
:'''K.O.''': Enid, I am going to help you!!
:'''Enid''': ''[jumped by K.O.]'' Ah! Excuse me?  
:'''K.O.''': ''[As he stands proudly]'' As an official helper of Gar's Bodega, I am going to help you see how great it is to help people! 
''[There's a small pause as Enid stares at K.O.]''
:'''Enid''': You'll never melt my icy heart. 
:'''K.O.''': We'll just see about that! ''[K.O. runs off to help people.]'' Gotta be helpful! Gotta be helpful! (pants)

===''We Messed Up'' [1.04]===
''[K.O., Rad, and Enid have just snuck into Mr. Gar's office and accidentally destroyed a photo he had of Carol. The trio shudder after imagining what will happen if Mr. Gar finds out.]'' 
:'''K.O.''': On second thought, why don't you two distract Mr. Gar while I try to get my mom to recreate this photo?
:'''Rad and Enid''': Hmm!
''[Rad gives Enid a boost to dunk K.O. into a vent.]''
:'''Enid''': Dah!
''[Rad and Enid exits Mr. Gar's office quickly.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': Radicles, Enid, any particular reason you're loitering so close to my office?
:'''Enid''': We...
:'''Rad''': Uh...
:'''Enid''': ...were, uh...
:'''Rad''': Practicing a new dance!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Oh, really? Let me see it.
''[K.O. is crawling inside the vents.]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Thinking] Mr. Gar has a photo of my mom. I have so many questions, like what, when, why, and huh? But I don't have time for that. I've got to get this photo remade.''
''[Transitions to the Fitness Dojo.]''
:'''Carol''': And one and two and punch!
''[K.O. comes out from the vent and the cover hits Ginger.]''
:'''K.O.''': Mom! Mom, I need you to be young and hot again!
:'''Carol''': (chuckles nervously) Let's go ahead and take five, girls. ''[Gertie and Gladys leaves the Dojo.]''
----
''[Enid and Rad are doing a dance in front of Mr. Gar to keep him distracted.]''
:'''Enid and Rad''': Ta-da! (Both panting, chuckling nervously)
''[They sweat in anticipation of Mr. Gar's response.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': (groans) I give it a 7.5.
:'''Rad''': 7.5?!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Now, if you'll excuse me.
''[Enid pushes Rad off to the side.]''
:'''Rad''': Aah!
:'''Enid''': Mr. Gar, wait! Hey, I, uh, saw someone in the magazine aisle for like 20 minutes.
:'''Mr. Gar''': A cheapskate?!
''[Transitions to the Fitness Dojo with Carol finding her outfit.]''
:'''Carol''': Mm. Ha! Here it is. But I don't think it's gonna fit, K.O. Bleh!
:'''K.O.''': But we got to get that pic!
:'''Carol''': Hmm. Mama's got an idea.
''[Transitions to Gar's Hero Supply &amp; Bodega with Mr. Gar grabbing Crinkly Wrinkly.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': If you want to read monster truck books for free, then go to the library!
''[He throws Crinkly Wrinkly through a space in the ceiling and is shot from the Cheapskate Cannon on the roof.]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Eee! (screams)
''[The scene displays a shot of jail, but instead, he lands in the library.]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Books!
:'''Unknown person''': Shh!
''[Transitions back to Gar's Hero Supply &amp; Bodega.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': I will not have no tightwads in no store of mine. No, sir. Where was I? Oh, yes. Back to my perfect office.
:'''Rad''': Mr. Gar! Mr. Gar! I... forgot.. how to... mop? ''[grabs a mop]'' Please, oh, please, teach me how. ''[He scrapes the floor with the mop.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': Mm.

===''Jethro's All Yours'' [1.05]===
:'''K.O.''': My first solo mission-- another step on my heroic journey. I’ll earn Rad and Enid’s trust by destroying Boxman’s powerful robot and make everyone proud-- especially Mommy. All right, Jethro. You asked for it, and now you’re gonna get it.
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Not for long. 
''[K.O. returns to catch Jethro, kicks him high in the air and jumps. K.O. repeatedly fights Jethro until he dismantles it and lands on the ground.]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) And so my journey continues. Huh? ''[An army of Jethros comes towards him]'' Brought your friends this time, eh?
:'''Jethros''': I am Jethro. I am Jethro. I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Wait, so you’re all Jethro? That doesn’t make sense! ''[Enrages then starting running to the army of Jethros and destroys them one-by-one]'' Whew! I didn’t realize becoming a hero meant sweating so much. Oh, well. Jethro, and Jethro, and Jethro and the other two Jethros are now gone. Forever. ''[A bigger version of Jethro approaches]''
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro. 
''[K.O. looks unamused, then Jethro rolls over and crushes a car.]''
:'''Brandon''': My mom’s car! Aah! It’s totaled, man. She’s gonna kill me.
:'''K.O.''': I don’t get it. He just keeps coming. ''[A thought bubble with Rad pops up.]''
:'''Rad''': Jethro’s perfect for you. He’s simple, and you’re simple. Simple, simple, simple.
:'''K.O.''': ''[Crumbles up the thought bubble]'' I’ll show you simple, you meanie. ''[Throws the crumble at Jethro]''
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': (sighs) Not for long. ''[K.O. is about to fight Jethro. Suddenly envisions himself as Jethro. K.O. feels that he can’t fight Jethro and stops his position]'' I just can’t do it.
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Do you know what my friend Rad says about us? That we’re simple.
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Is that how Lord Boxman treats you? Like you’re some dumb kid? Like you’re not worth anything? Do people underestimate you, too?
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Well, I am K.O.. And maybe Rad was right. You and I are a lot alike. So I don’t think I can’t clobber you. ''[Once Jethro meets K.O.’s foot, he suddenly falls apart.]'' Poop.
----
''[Outside of the plaza, birds are flying away. Joff, A Real Magic Skeleton, Nick Army, Punching Judy, and Crinkly Wrinkly turn around in shock and run away from Mega-Jethro when he runs over multiple cars.]''
:'''Joff, A Real Magic Skeleton, Nick Army, Punching Judy, and Crinkly Wrinkly''': Oh!
:'''Brandon''': My dad’s car! ''[Runs off to it]''
''[Enid, K.O., and Rad run out of the store to see Mega-Jethro approaching the store.]''
:'''Mega Jethro''': I am Mega-Jethro.
:'''Enid''': Bye. ''[goes back in the store, unamused]''
:'''K.O.''': See, I told you. Jethro’s a way-more complicated enemy than you thought.
:'''Rad''': Pfft, child’s play. It’s Jethro. He’s still simple, and you’re still simple. ''[K.O. is angry at him]'' I’m so sure of it, I’ll tag along with you 'cause the only thing I love more than being proved right is proving other people wrong.
:'''Mega Jethro''': I am Mega-Jethro.
''[K.O. and Rad runs towards to Mega-Jethro.]''
:'''K.O.''': Jethro, don’t do this! You’ve got to stop!
:'''Mega Jethro''': I am Mega-Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Oh, sorry. Mega-Jeth-- Mega-Jethro, don’t do this! You’ve got to stop!
----
''[K.O. and Rad enter the pupil opening in Mega-Jethro and it’s revealed that the inside is nothing more than a light source and a switch.]''
:'''Rad''': (laughs) Looks just like your head, K.O..
:'''K.O.''': You-- You shouldn’t underestimate us! I mean him. There’s probably a super-tough puzzle we need to solve to get…
''[Rad pulls the switch. Rad and K.O. bounce all over the place as a result.]''
:'''Rad and K.O.''': Oh! Ahh! Ow! Aah!
''[Mega-Jethro continues to approach the store, but at the moment he touches a piece of the store, a beeping noise is heard and he moves backwards now. Inside the store, Enid still continues to listen to her music and rolls her eyes at what’s going on out there.]''
:'''Brandon''': ''[examining his dad’s smashed car]'' Well, this doesn’t seem too bad. Yeah, it’s gonna be okay. I can totally fix this.
''[Mega-Jethro smashes the car again. A tear drops from Brandon's eye.]''
:'''Rad''': Sweet, we’re moving away from the plaza now. Let’s bounce, squirt. Uh, squirt? Squirt!
:'''K.O.''': Oh. Coming!
''[Rad and K.O. jump out of Mega-Jethro. The next scene shows Lord Boxman drinking a cup of tea and the sound waves coming off from Mega-Jethro result in him losing grip of his teacup, spilling on his lab coat.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Gah! Blast! What is happening out there? ''[Turns around and sees Mega-Jethro approaching close to his factory]'' Poop. ''[Mega-Jethro makes an impact with the factory, setting off an explosion.]''
:'''Rad''': Too easy.

===''You're Level 100'' [1.06]===
''[K.O. has become popular, because of his Pow Card, which says he is level 100. The scene cuts to the Action News 52 opening scene.]''
:'''Announcer''': This is Action News 52, bringing you your daily dose of action news!
''[The Action News 52 truck appears, falls off a cliff and lands on a car.]''
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': ''[Kicks a door out]'' Action! Hup! This is Dynamite Watkins, comin’ at you live in the heart of the neutral zone. We’re here in front of Gar’s bodega, where a crowd has gathered to see the newcomer hero with a power level of 100. You heard me, level 100! And here is the famed hero himself, K.O.! How does it feel being the most powerful being in the plaza-- possibly the world!
:'''K.O.''': Well, I always knew I would be a great hero some day, but I didn’t think it would happen after only a week! Guess I’m just that good!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': And how do your friends and family feel about this newfound power of yours?
:'''Enid''': ''[Enid and Rad tries to get in the way]'' Make way, coming though! Move it, jerk! Not to brag, but me and K.O. go way back to the beginning of the week. N.B.D.
:'''Rad''': And I sort of act as K.O.’s best friend/life coach/older brother figure. We’re really close.
:'''Potato''': K.O.! Can i have your autograph?!
:'''K.O.''': Ha, sure kid. ''[Signs Potato’s book]'' [Thinking] Wow, being level 100 is so cool. ''[Signs another book]'' Everyone loves me and I feel so important! ''[Signs Brandon’s arm]'' I can’t wait to put my amazing skills to the test and some dastardly foe! ''[Signs another book]'' And who should I make this out to?
:'''Lord Boxman''': Lord Boxman.
:'''K.O.''': ''[Continues to sign]'' Lord… Boxm-- Lord Boxman!
''[Lord Boxman is shown behind his floating desk.]'' 
:'''Lord Boxman''': So, you’re the little twerp claiming to be level 100. Ha! Impossible!
:'''K.O.''': Oh, yeah? If I weren’t a level 100, how else would i have kicked your butt all week?
:'''Lord Boxman''': Well, that was… on purpose! I lost to you on purpose, yes, as a… as a prank on you! So… ha! Anyway, ''[pulls out a remote]'' today I have something specially prepared that only a true level 100 hero could handle. Much stronger than anything you’ve yet faced. ''[A Boxmore box falls from the sky, revealing a giant Darrell.]'' Say hello to my latest creation. I call him, Big Darrell. I’ve upped him to be level negative 100! Ba-ha-ha!
:'''Crowd''': Oh! This is bad!
:'''Enid''': K.O., this thing is really powerful. Yeah bud, maybe we should call Mr.-- mph!
:'''K.O.''': ''[Shoves his Pow Card to Rad’s mouth]'' Heh. Trust me, guys, this will be easy for a level 100 like me. Just try not to get in the way. you really think this bucket of bolts will be able to stop me? Heh. i stomped you once and I’ll stomp you again, Lord Buttman!
:'''Crowd''': K.O.! K.O.! K.O.! K.O.! 
''[Enid and Rad look at each other worriedly.]''

===''SIbling Rivalry'' [1.07]===
''[Shannon and Darrell come flying through the ceiling of Boxmore after being defeated by K.O., Read, and Enid and land before Boxman, sitting on his throne.]''
:'''Shannon and Darrell''': We're sorry, Father! We tried!
:'''Lord Boxman''': Ah, yes. Tried. Tried and failed-- for the last time!
:'''Darrell''': Oh, I bet we could fail way more times.
:'''Shannon''': Quiet!
''[Shannon punches Darrell.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': You do not need to try. You need to do! (sighs) I knew you two would fail me again today. So I created a new robot to succeed where you never could! Say hello to Raymond!
''[Boxman presses a button and a door opens, where a robot comes out.]''
:'''Raymond''': (laughs) Here comes... the player of the year!
''[Raymond makes a show off presentation with sports balls.]''
:'''Shannon''': Already hate him.
:'''Raymond''': Hello, dearest brother and sister. Care for a friendly game of ball?
:'''Shannon''': No, thanks.
:'''Darrell''': Oh, I'm open!
''[Raymond hits Darrell with a ball, that bounces between him and Shannon, knocking both out.]''
:'''Raymond''': Of course, there is no game to be played, when there is just one player.
:'''Lord Boxman''': Brilliant introduction, Raymond! So very rude!
:'''Raymond''': Thank you, Coach Boxman. Of course it was brilliant! You are, after all, the master engineer behind this vessel of pure athleticism.
''[Raymond show Lord Boxman a rose and he jumps around excitedly.]''
:'''Shannon''':Totally just parlor tricks of a slimy amateur clown.
:'''Raymond''': Father, I will make you proud by stealing a letter from the Gar's Bodega sign. Then no one will know they're a store. Their profits will plummet, and with that, they forfeit the business game.
:'''Lord Boxman''': I love it!
''[Shannon and Darrell gasp in surprise.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Raymond, you're my favorite. I've always loved you. And I wish you two could be more like him.
''[Shannon and Darrell roll out of scene in pain.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Let us go, Raymond, and equip you with strong weapons.
:'''Raymond''': (laughs) Yes! Hole in one.
''[Shannon and Darrell are shown in graves and pop out of them.]''
:'''Shannon''': This is all your fault, glass brain! Now Father hates me.
:'''Darrell''': Oh, yeah, right! He hates me more. But he loves Raymond so much more than both of us.
:'''Shannon''': Raymond is gonna fail anyways. But he won't fail as spectacularly as you!
:'''Darrell''': Say that again, you orange mushroom head!
''[Shannon and Darrell slap each other.]''

===''I Am Dendy'' [1.08]===
''[K.O. is helping Dendy, a shy kappa girl from his class, find the parts needed to repair her hack-pack. They arrive at an arcade.]''
:'''K.O.''': Here we are!
:'''Dendy''': A token machine?
:'''K.O.''': We’re just .25 technos away from your cotton pooter disc. Lemme just grab a coin! ''[While opening his pocket, some moths fly out.]'' No! My moth collection! No, come back! ''[Dendy opens the back of the token machine.]'' Uhh! ''[Catches the moth]'' Gotcha, you little scamp! Guess we’ll need another way-- ''[Dendy moves a wire.]'' Dendy? Dendy?! ''[Tokens start spewing out of the machine.]'' Whoa, guess we didn’t need coins after all.
:'''Dendy''': These tokens should meet our needs.
:'''K.O.''': You’re always a step ahead of people, huh?
:'''Dendy''': I do walk quickly, yes.
:'''K.O.''': No, I mean, like, you kinda just do things in your own way. It’s kinda weird! But it’s kinda really cool, too?
:'''Dendy''': ''[Smiles]'' Now, the final item I need is a glorb. ''[Shows hologram]'' The simplest course of action would be to return to the roboto barber, tear open his interior circuits and extract it by force.
:'''K.O.''': Whoa, wait! You can’t hurt Mr. Logic!
:'''Dendy''': Oh, but how do we acquire a glorb without a robot?
:'''K.O.''': Well, we fight a ton of bad robots around here, and after, we toss ‘em in an alley out back!
:'''Dendy''': Hmm. Very well. To the alloy!
:'''K.O.''': Alley.
:'''Dendy''': To the alley!
Ok crying

===''Do You Have Any More in the Back?'' [1.09]===
''[Rad is leading K.O. and Enid through the maze-like back room of the store and have gotten lost.]''
:'''K.O.''': I can’t even tell what direction we started from!
:'''Rad''': You don’t gotta worry about that with me guiding ya! ''[Passes through vines]'' Watch your head.
:'''K.O.''': Oh. (chuckles)
:'''Enid''': Uh, vines? Rad, are you sure this is the right-- Hey! Check out these Gloops!
''[Gloops, small blob-like creatures, are slithering on the ground.]''
:'''K.O.''': Weird!
:'''Enid''': Hey, Rad, is it okay to touch these things?!
:'''Rad''': Sure.
''[Enid pokes a Gloop with a stick and the stick instantly disintegrates.] ''
:'''Enid''': Ooh! (screams) What the heck, dude?! I almost lost my favorite hand!
:'''Rad''': Oh! I thought you meant, uh, emotionally touch-- like tell it a sad story or something. Yeah, you shouldn’t physically touch these things.
:'''K.O.''': Wow! Rad really knows his stuff!

===''My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad!'' [1.10]===
''[K.O. is looking at the food at Burrito Beardo’s and is drooling.]''
:'''Beardo''': All right, all right, all right. ''[Starts handing the food to the customers]'' We got one order of the Joe and Macaroni, one Sypros Platter, and one Gnocchi Gnocchi Panic. 
''[The customers receive their food and head off.]''
:'''K.O.''': Man, it all looks so delicious.
''[Rad eats his Dragon Dragon Burrito.]''
:'''Rad''': I recommend the Dragon Dragon Burrito. ''[Burps out dragons]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) I really want to try that, but the burgs and potato wedges also look really good. Hmm.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (clears throat)
''[K.O. turns around to see the Lizard Gang waiting in line. Chameleon Jr. looks at his watch and sighs. The titlecard appears.]''
:'''K.O.''': So, wedges, I think. Oh, maybe--
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (clears throat loudly) Hmph! Take your time. It’s cool. It’s not like anybody is waiting.
:'''K.O.''': Ah, thank goodness. I was worried I was taking too long.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': Great. We got a real genius here.
''[The Lizard Gang laughs]''
:'''K.O.''': Aww! Thanks for the compliment.
''[The Lizard Gang laughs again]''
:'''Rad''': Dude, K.O., you’re not getting complimented. You’re getting zinged.
:'''K.O.''': (gasps) What? No! What should I do?
:'''Rad''': Zing him back. A true hero never backs down. They fight fire… ''[Eats the burrito and breathes fires]'' with fire.
:'''K.O.''': Even firefighters?
:'''Rad''': Yes. They use blowtorches.
''[K.O. faces the Lizard Gang and one of them taps Chameleon Jr. to look at him.]''
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (chuckles) What are you looking at, neeeeeeeeeeeeerd? ''[The NERD text shoots out from his mouth while K.O. dodges it.]'' (laughs)
:'''K.O.''': Well, it takes one to know one! ''[K.O. shoots out text from his mouth hitting Chameleon Jr.]''
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': Oh yeah? ''[Shouts out text once more]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Punches the YEAH text]'' Yeeeeeaaah! ''[The Yeah text pushes Chameleon’s Jr.’s gang.]'' (sighs)
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (growls) Oh, it’s on, now. I challenge you to a clash of fists!
:'''K.O.''': Bring on the fire, jerko. I’ll torch you like a creme brulee.
:'''Beardo''': (laughs)
:'''Rad''': Nice.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''' (growls) Have a taste of my sticky tongue. ''[K.O. dodges his sticky tongue,and it gets stuck on Beardo’s truck.]'' Ohhhhhhh. Oof! ''[His tongue unsticks and slaps him in the face, turning him pink.]''
:'''Rad, Beardo, and K.O.''': (laughs)
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (growls) Well, m-m-my dad can beat up your dad!
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can… My dad can… I don’t have a dad.
''[Beardo laughs and stops while Rad coughs on his burrito.]''
:'''K.O.''': But I have a mom that can beat up anybody!
:'''Beardo''': Whew.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': Then it’s on. 3:00 sharp, roof of the plaza.
:'''K.O.''': We’ll be there. My mom is gonna love this.
''[The scene cuts to Carol.]''
:'''Carol''': I hate this, K.O.. I am very disappointed in you. You’re grounded.

===''You Get Me'' [1.11]===
''[Enid has been turned to stone and K.O. has told Rad and Mr. Gar about it. Unfortunately, they don't see anything wrong with her.]''
:'''K.O.''': [thinking] They didn't realize Enid's been turned to stone! Why? (gasps) Could it be that I'm the only one that gets her after all? Alright, this is my change to prove that I can be an Enid-getter, and a go-getter! Time to get help, and turn her back to normal.
''[Scene cuts to Dendy running some tests on Enid.]''
:'''K.O.''': Thanks again for coming, Dendy. I just knew that I could count on you to have some super-smart way to get to the bottom of this!
:'''Dendy''': It is my pleasure, K.O. I will metaphorically leave no stone unturned.
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) And literally, too, right?
:'''Dendy''': What? Ooo, oooh, the results are printing. Hmm... Mmm-hmm... Mmm-hm. Well, K.O, it would appear as if your friend has been turned into steatite.
:'''K.O.''': Huh?
:'''Dendy''': It is also known as soapstone. It is commonly used by novice sculptors to practice carving techniques because of its relative softness.
:'''K.O.''': I know that! I mean, I didn't know what kind of a rock, and that is super interesting, but what I was rally hoping for was to turn her back from rock to person.
:'''Dendy''': Ohhhh... I don't really do... that.
:'''K.O.''': Noooo! I can't help her. And no one else thinks they need to help her. How is she ever going to come back?
:'''Dendy''': I don't know anything about Enid's predicament. Or giving emotional counsel. I am sorry K.O. See you at school tomorrow!

===''You Are Rad'' [1.12]===
''[Rad has accused K.O. of trying to impersonate him, so Rad gives him a series of challenges to prove to everyone that K.O. isn't the real Rad. It's now down to the final challenge, a rap battle.]''
:'''K.O.''': Rap battle? Are we supposed to punch each other with rhymes?
:'''Rad''': More or less. Gimme a beat, Enid!
:'''Enid''': No, thanks.
:'''Rad''': Aw, man, come on.
:'''Enid''': (sighs) Fine. ''[Puts on her DJ outfit and flips the counter to her DJ set. Plays music.]''
:'''Rad''': Yeah, I can work with that. All right, imposter, get ready, ‘cause this ends here. 
''[Rapping]'' 
:♪Ohh, I’m the extraterrestrial, emphasis on extra♪
:♪My skin is blue because I come from Planet X, bruh♪
:♪If you step on this, you gonna get creamed♪
:♪If you outta line, you gonna get laser beamed♪
:♪Arms ripped, afro poofy♪ 
:♪Ears tipped, you goofy♪ 
:♪Liftin’ and pumpin’ and crushin’ the weights♪
:♪Don’t be surprised when I thrash you♪ 
:♪Movin’ and settin’ and stackin’ the crates♪
''[Uses his powers to move the crates]'' 
:♪And you ain’t nothin’ but trash, do♪ 
''[Throws K.O. into the crate “trash”]'' 
:♪You lookin’ foolish♪ 
:♪You ain’t the real me♪
:♪I am the true Rad♪ 
:♪I know you feel me♪ 
:♪He is Radicles♪ 
:♪Ain’t nobody ever wanna mess with me♪ 
:♪I said he is Radicles♪ 
:♪I ain’t got time for no identity thief♪ 
''[Drops mic]''
:'''Enid''': Hey! Careful with my gear!
:'''Rad''': ''[Picks up mic]'' Sorry, Enid.
:'''Enid''': That’s right you are.
:'''K.O.''': Uh, Enid, do you know “Wash Your Hands”?
:'''Enid''': I’ll see what I can do, K.O.. Knock em dead! ''[Replaces a disk with a new one. Plays a new song.]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, cool. All right, here goes nothin’. 
''[Rapping]'' 
:♪Well, I’m Radicles and I’m here to say♪ 
:♪I learned a lot about myself today♪ 
''[Takes out notepad]'' 
:♪I’m a yoga guy with a yoga mat♪
:♪Don’t believe it, ask the kids I babysat♪
:♪Sharks and bees ain’t where it’s at♪ 
:♪I rather snuggle up with a kitty cat♪ 
:♪I like to burp and I like to toot♪ 
:♪But deep inside, I’m really cute♪ 
:♪Wash your hands, wash your hands♪ 
:♪It’s a good idea to wash your hands♪
:'''Drupe''': (snickers)
:'''K.O.''': ♪Lather ‘em up with a little bit of soap♪ 
:♪Wash your hands, don’t be a dope♪ 
:'''Rad''': ''[Grabs mic from K.O.]'' Listen, imposter. I don’t babysit or do yoga, and I definitely don’t like snuggling kittens.
:'''K.O.''': I don’t understand. That all seems like cool stuff to me.
:'''Rad''': But Rad would never find that stuff cool. And even if he did, Rad wouldn’t be ready to share those things about himself. If you really were Rad, you’d know that.
:'''K.O.''': Oh. Gah! You got me! All that stuff I rapped about was lies. I was, uh, trying to embarrass you. Yeah. Isn’t that what rapping battles are all about?
:'''Rad''': I guess. Uh, yeah! Yeah, you’re right!
:'''K.O.''': Well, I guess my little plan didn’t work. You’re the real Rad-- ''[Hands name tag to Rad and puts it on]'' tough, cool, and totally one-dimensional.
:'''Enid''': ''[Record scratches]'' All right, I’m bored. Everybody out. ''[Her DJ set turns back to a counter; she changes her outfit and listens to her music.]''

===''Just Be a Pebble'' [1.13]===
''[At Gar's Hero Supply &amp; Bodega, K.O. is struggling to put a box on the shelf. Rad passes by with a forklift and stops.]''
:'''K.O.''': (groans, sighs) Rad, I'm too small!
:'''Rad''': Why not try some of this candy? ''[Throws the candy to K.O.]'' Just got 'em in. Check out the wrapper. ''[K.O. catches the candy]'' It's a little guy turning into a big guy. So they'll probably make you big.
:'''K.O.''': Big?
:'''Rad''': Not that I ever need that junk, though. (chuckles) 'Cause I'm so huge already.
:'''K.O.''': I trust you, big friend! ''[Eats the candy]''
''[Nothing happens.]''
:'''Rad''': Well, that was a du--.
''[K.O. grows into the same height as Rad.]''
:'''K.O.''':  Whoo! ''[Picks up the box and places it on the shelf.]'' Wow, just like that.
:'''Rad''': I can't believe that actually worked. ''[Leaves]''
:'''K.O.''': This is perfect. So maybe I'm not a Gargantuan, but I'm definitely more than Megahugeman. And that's good enough for me. ''[Looks at the packages of the candy.]''
:'''Rad''': ''[Reads a magazine and gets startled of K.O.'s growing limbs]'' Aah!
:'''Enid''': ''[On her phone and also gets startled of K.O.'s growing limbs]'' Aah! Rad, what the heck is going...? K.O.? ''[K.O. grows to become a giant and eventually damages the roof of the store.]'' Whoa. I am not cleaning this up.
:'''K.O.'''; ''[Waves at Enid]'' Hi, Enid, I'm big now! ''[A pteradactyl slams onto his hand.]'' Whoops! (blows) ''[Pteradactyl squawks]'' Sorry!
:'''Rad''': Looking good, buddy!
:'''Enid''': He may look good, but we won't when Mr. Gar sees his store is destroyed.
:'''Rad''': Oh, good point. Never mind, K.O. You look like crud!
:'''Enid''': ''[Covers Rad's mouth with her hand]'' K.O., why are you so big?
:'''K.O.''': (chuckles) I ate some of this weird candy. ''[Drops a bunch of candy.]'' Green ones make you big.
:'''Enid''': Uh, is there one that can make you small again?
:'''Rad''': Yeah. I don't know about that. None of these look super-promising.
:'''K.O.''': Don't worry, guys. I won't be needing to get small again. That's the old K.O. Now I'm finally what I've wanted to be ever since I was little-- just this morning-- ''[Stretches his arms and jumps up and damage the roof once more.]'' Huge!

===''Presenting Joe Cuppa'' [1.14]===
''[K.O. is helping Joe Cuppa, a washed up comedian, regain his confidence by working alongside him in the bodega. But, Joe is discouraged.]''
:'''K.O.''': Yeah, maybe working here isn’t the right thing to help you right now.
:'''Joe Cuppa''': ''[His work vest disappears with flames]'' Oh. ''[Alarm goes off]'' Huh? What’s going on?!
:'''K.O.''': ''[carries Joe Cuppa]'' You’re gonna love this! Nothing cheers me up more than beating up bad guys! ''[Throws him out the window.]''
''[Rad, K.O., and Enid exit and prepare to battle.]''
:'''Enid''': Psst, Joe. Prepare to intimidate.
''[Joe is shown wearing only underwear lying on the ground.]'' 
:'''Joe Cuppa''': Like this? (chuckles)
:'''Enid''': Intimidate not intimate!
''[A Boxmore box drops on the ground, marked &quot;Shannon 2.0&quot;. It opens up to reveal Shannon. She gets off her throne.]''
:'''Shannon''': Welcome, plazoids! It’s me-- Shannon!
:'''Enid''': Yeah, we know it’s you, Shannon.
:'''Rad''': You can’t say welcome! You came here! Plus , you’re not welcome, like, at all. Go away.
:'''Shannon''': ''[chuckles]'' I’m welcoming you… ''[releases her weapons]'' TO YOUR DEMISE!
:'''Joe Cuppa''': Whoa! Would you look at the time.
:'''Shannon''': ''[Holds her blade in front of Joe Cuppa]'' Hold up! Is this a new addition to your little ensemble? ''[Stretches her head out]'' Looks a little… ''pathetique.'' ''[Joe Cuppa whimpers]'' He fits right in! ''[transforms into a hammer and smashes the ground.]''
:'''Enid, K.O., and Rad''': Whoa! ''[Joe Cuppa fell to the ground with coffee spilled.]'' Joe?!
:'''Shannon''': Hold that pose! ''[takes pictures]'' I gotta show H.Q. how hard I am crushing you right now.
:'''Joe Cuppa''': ''[sighs]'' Listen, guys, I’m just your average Joe. I ain’t got powers like you. I’m no hero, that’s for sure.
:'''Rad''': No powers?! Pfff! ''[looks into Joe Cuppa’s head.]'' There’s gotta be something in th-- ''[finds a mouth and screams]'' Oh, ''that’s'' where your mouth is! That’s super disgusting!

===''We've Got Pests'' [1.15]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''Legends of Mr. Gar'' [1.16]===
''[Darrell is shown spray painting the words &quot;smells bad&quot; under the Lakewood Plaza Turbo sign, so it reads &quot;Lakewood Plaza Turbo smells bad&quot;.]''
:'''Darrell''': (laughs maniacally) 
:'''Enid''': You're going down, Darrell!
''[Darrell is thrown off of his ladder and falls to the ground. K.O., Rad, Enid, and Mr. Gar surround him.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': You've messed with the plaza for the last time, bucket of bolts! And you can send that message to Lord Boxman!
:'''Enid''': First class! 
:'''Rad''': Signed, sealed, and delivered! 
:'''K.O.''': Yeah! In an envelope! 
''[K.O. puts an envelope in a mailbox and then it shoots it out in Darrell's face.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': Thanks for the backup on that trash talk, team.
----
''[After Mr. Gar has defeated Darrell, K.O., Rad, and Enid are laying on their backs in amazement at the battle.]''
:'''K.O.''': Our boss is the dang coolest.
:'''Rad''': Uh huh.
:'''Enid''': Totally. 
:'''Mr. Gar''': Don't just lay there impressed! Drop and give me twenty! 
''[The trio is thrown on their heads by Mr. Gar's voice and fall back.]''
:'''K.O.''': Uh, twenty whats, sir?
:'''Mr. Gar''': Twenty...everything! 
''[K.O., Rad, and Enid start doing various exercises]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': 1, 2. 1, 2. 1, 2...
''[Mr. Gar stares on, impressed]''
----
''[In Enid's flashback of her first day of work, Mr. Gar has just heard a customer's complaint and is showing Enid how to deal with him.]''
:'''Enid''': M-Mr. Gar, I--
:'''Mr. Gar''': Enid, I'm gonna teach you a very important lesson. 
:'''Skateboard Nerd''': (chuckles) Yeah! That the customer is always-- Huh?
''[Mr. Gar suddenly grabs the Skateboard Nerd and holds him up to his face]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': '''''We're all out of wheel polish!! Sorry we can't help you!! Thank you for shopping at Gar's!!'''''
''[Enid is shown with her mouth open in shock]''
----
''[Crinkly Wrinkly just finished telling K.O., Rad, and Enid a far-fetched tale about Mr. Gar]''
:'''Enid''': Well, that was a bunch of drivel.
:'''Rad''': Obviously a fabrication.
:'''K.O.''': Ha! Amazing! 
:'''Enid''': K.O., you probably shouldn't listen to Crinkly Wrinkly. 
:'''K.O.''': Why's that?
:'''Enid''': (points off-screen) Well...
''[Crinkly Wrinkly is shown looking at himself in a mirror, mistaking his reflection for another person]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Who's that?! You got a cane just like mine! (chuckles)

===''Know Your Mom'' [1.17]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''We're Captured'' [1.18]===
''[Lord Boxman has K.O., Rad, and Enid suspended above a lava pit in his factory. He is also trying to have dinner with Professor Venomous and is at odds at what to do with the trio.]''
:'''K.O.''': So, you're gonna let us go?
''[Him and his friends smile hopefully]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': No. I'm just gonna have to wait until after dinner, like a mint-- a punish-mint.
''[Shannon is heard singing a song to entertain Professor Venomous and Fink.]''
:'''Shannon''': ♪When you're climbing up a ladder♪
:♪And you feel a little splatter, dia--♪
:'''Lord Boxman''': Nooooo!! ''[runs off to stop her]''
----
''[Lord Boxman, Professor Venomous, and Fink are sitting down for dinner. Fink pokes at her burnt food.]''
:'''Professor Venomous''': Don't play with your food.
:'''Fink''': (growls) But it tastes like foo foo!
:'''Lord Boxman''': (laughs nervously) I think it's time for a toast. To the loveliest and most bestest client in the whole wide world-- Professor Venomous! 
''[Fink holds up a sign depicting an ear of corn, meaning that Boxman's speech is corny.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Whose mastery of bio-engineering is unparalleled and-- ''[Darrell suddenly appears at the table wearing a sailor suit.]'' and a true inspiration to-- Get out of here, Darrell!! (chuckles nervously)
----
:'''Professor Venomous''': You had better have a good explanation for this. 
:'''Fink''': Yeah! Coconut cream?! What were you thinking?! 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Professor, I-I— I… Ooooohh! I’ll destroy those brats for ruining dessert! 
:'''Shannon''': Oh! Are we destroying brats? 
:'''Darrell''': Are having dessert? [A pie is thrown at him] Ugh! [Lord Boxman catches him] Thanks, Dad. [Lord Boxman bends him] Ooh! 
''[Shannon laughs as Lord Boxman takes her arm one by one. K.O., Enid, and Rad continues throwing pies as Lord Boxman builts a cannon. He catches the pies]''
:'''Enid''': Uh, guys, we’re tapped. 
:'''Lord Boxman''': [Rips his coat and shirt and puts his tie around his head] And now you’re trapped! [Fires the pies which pelts the gang] 
:'''Enid''': Ugh! 
:'''Professor Venomous''': Boxman! 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Oh! Professor, please! I-I can explain! I can explain! I can— I can— Okay, I can’t explain. But this was not the way it was supposed— 
:'''Professor Venomous''': [Covers his mouth] May I? 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Oh… yes. By all means. 
''[Enid, K.O., and Rad struggles to get out]''
:'''Professor Venomous''': Dinner parties are just so… stuffy. [Loads the bazooka] But vanquishing heroes— now, that’s much more exciting! 
:'''Fink''': [On top of the bazooka] Fire! 
''[The last pie launches the gang out of Boxmore]''
:'''Fink''': [Laughs] [Falls off] Whoa! Oof! 
:'''Professor Venomous''': I have to be honest, Boxman. I agreed to come tonight with plans to sever our business relationship after dinner. 
:'''Lord Boxman''': [Voice breaking] What?! 
:'''Professor Venomous''': You seemed too distracted lately. Though, now I understand why that was. Hard to find folks who value the sport in squashing heroes. And if all your robots can be as fun as this one, then I’ll gladly order 1,000 of them! 
:'''Lord Boxman''': You… still… want my robots? You still… [Whimpers] …want me? 
''[Professor Venomous chuckles. Lord Boxman laughs and gives Professor Venomous a hug]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Just… Big hug! [Thinking] Oh, Boxy! You really can have it all. [Fink triggers a punching glove to him] Waughhhh! 
''[Fink laughs. The next scene shows the gang still in pie trap]''
:'''K.O.''': W-What is this? 
:'''Enid''': It’s called “losing.” 
:'''Rad''': Would a loser get to travel the open air in a vehicle made of delicious pie? I don’t think so. [Eats the pie]

===''Face Your Fears'' [1.19]===
''[Read and K.O. are trying to get Mr. Gar's attention.]''
:'''Rad and K.O.''': Mr. Gar, Mr. Gar!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Huh?!
:'''Rad''': There's this new game at the arcade called &quot;The Face of Fear&quot;. It makes you face your biggest fears, and adjusts your fear resistance stat depending on how well you do! Look how fearless we've become. ''[shows Mr. Gar his and K.O.'s Pow Cards]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': 10? 15? (growls) You kids and your videos game, pah! I never needed some cockamamie machine to help me face my own fears.
:'''K.O.''': What's your fear resistance, Mr. Gar? I bet it's pretty high.
:'''Mr. Gar''': I haven't checked in a while, it's probably through the roof by now... ''[pulls out his Pow Card and checks his stats]'' It's...8?!
:'''Rad, K.O., and Enid''': 8?!
:'''Mr. Gar''': This is absurd! I-I guess I haven't updated it in a while... Not since I left P.O.I.- (laughs nervously) What I mean to say was, there'd be no ''point'' in me checking, since I'm impervious to fear. Heh, heh.
:'''Enid''': Then I ''guess'' you wouldn't be afraid of playing the game and updating your info?
:'''Mr. Gar''': Heh...

===''Everybody Likes Rad?'' [1.20]===
''[Rad is filming an internet video.]''
:'''Rad''': Rad rocket’s on the roof and ready to roll. ''[Launches a rocket]'' Blorp! ''[Face plants on his camera]'' Rad rocket’s on the roof-- 
''[Enid is shown watching the video.]'' 
:'''Enid''': (laughs)
:'''Rad on video''': Blorp! 
:'''Enid''': (laughs harder) ''[Titlecard appears]'' ''[continues laughing as she shows the video to K.O.]''
:'''Rad on video''': Rad rocket’s on the roof and ready to roll. Blorp!
:'''K.O.''': ''[Drops his broom]'' Oh, no! Rad, you accidentally forgot to cut out the part where you fall through the roof!
:'''Rad''': ''[On the roof]'' Are you kidding? ''[levitates off the roof]'' Whoa! This video is a work of art, K.O.. Every detail is perfect. The setup, the unexpected nature of the fall, the way the rocket launch gets cut off at the end… Mwah! You couldn’t plan something that good.
:'''Enid''': I got to hand it to you, Rad. I can’t not share this.
:'''Rad''': See, K.O.? The joke may be on me, but it’s still my joke. [A part of the roof fall on him.] Blorp!
:'''K.O.''': Rad!
:'''Enid''': (laughs) You’re on a roll today.
''[K.O. picks up the debris to find Rad’s head.]''
:'''Rad''': Please tell me you got that on video.

===''You Have to Care'' [1.21]===
''[Crowd is outside making noise. K.O. and Rad looks out.]''
:'''K.O.''': What’s that?!
:'''Rad''': Whoa!
''[A pink war tank approaches. Shoots out Elodie]''
:'''Elodie''': Greetings, Lakewood Plaze! Elodie has arrived!
:'''Crowd''': Elodie! Elodie!
''[Elodie shoots her arrow which makes signatures on the crowd]''
:'''Brandon''': Sign my chest!
''[The arrow land on the window]''
:'''K.O.''': Wow! It’s really Elodie. ''[gets his Elodie Pow Card out]'' She goes to POINT Prep Academy. They only allow the best of the best. Gee. I want to apply there someday.
:'''Enid''': Huh? ''[slides off the counter and wears a disguise and read a magazine]''
''[The crowd follows Elodie]''
:'''Elodie''': Thank you. Just passing through my favorite hero shop to sign some autographs!
''[A photographer shoots a picture of K.O., Elodie, and Rad. Enid is in the background]''
:'''Elodie''': ''[sees Enid in the photo]'' (gasps) ''[Tosses the photo]'' Enid.
:'''Enid''': Elodie.
:'''Elodie''': Is this what you’ve been up to all this time? Oh, how... quaint. ''[Crowd grabs her as they chant her name]'' Well, toodles! 
''[Rad and K.O. point back and forth]''
:'''Enid''': Grrrr! (gags) I’m taking a break. I’ll be out back. ''[she vanishes and a log with shades takes her place]''
:'''K.O.''': Rad, do you know what’s going on?
:'''Rad''': Almost never.
:'''K.O.''': Something’s wrong with Enid. Elodie showed up, and she started acting all funny.
:'''Rad''': Well, there’s only one way to find out. We just got to ask her until she tells us. Trust me, K.O.. Subtlety is my middle name. ''[enters the break room]'' Hey, Enid! What’s the deal with you and Elodie?! ''[Enid smacks him offscreen]'' Unh! ''[he crashes into a pile of boxes while a small dinosaur appears]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Thinking]'' Hmm. Maybe it’d be better to ask Elodie about this.

===''Plaza Prom'' [1.22]===
''[K.O. is serving drinks at the Plaza Prom.]'' 
:'''K.O.''': Drink, sir? Drink, ma’am? Ma’am, would you like a drink? ''[Sees Carol looking attractive]'' Whoooa! ''[Throws the drinks away]'' You look so beautiful!

:'''Carol''': Ha! You gonna give me the honor of a dance sometime tonight?

:'''K.O.''': I gotta get back to work.

''[Mr. Gar pants and sweats. Drinks the whole punch.]''

:'''Colewort''': ''[Grabs a cup but puts it back]'' Huh? Oh.

:'''Carol''': You serve those appetizers!

:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[Slides through Carol’s sight]'' Hello, Carol. How you-- are you doing?

:'''Carol''': I’m pretty good. Enjoying yourself?

:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[Strained]'' Hello, Carol. How are you doing?

:'''Carol''': Uhh, are you okay, Gene?

:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[Straining more]'' Hello, Carol. How are you doing?

:'''Carol''': ''[Walks away]'' Oh, boy.

''[Mr. Gar pants]''

===''Second First Date'' [1.23]===
''[Cupid, a large muscular man, has just magically appeared in the bodega]''
:'''Cupid''': Love conquers all.
:'''Rad and Enid''': Cupid?!
:'''Cupid''': Two people in this room have unresolved romantic tension. 
''[Cupid gets ready to fire a heart-shaped bazooka]''
:'''Rad and Enid''': (gasps)
''[They duck and K.O. moves out of the way as the blast creates a heart-shaped hole in the shelves and back wall. Potato and Colewort stand up from one of the shelves]''
:'''Potato''': Actually, we're just taking things slow.
:'''Cupid''': Nobody cares!
''[Rad and Enid are trying to tiptoe out of the store, when Cupid stops them]''
:'''Cupid''': It's you two I'm here for. What's your deal?!
:'''Enid''': (chuckles) Me and Rad? (laughs) Never. Pssh. 
:'''Rad''': Never?! That's a funny way to say, &quot;That one time&quot;.
:'''Enid''': You know as well as I do that middle school dating is stricken from the record!
:'''K.O.''': What?! Slow down. You guys dated? Each other?! 
:'''Enid''': It was just one date, K.O. (sighs) It was a long time ago.

===''One Last Score'' [1.24]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''T.K.O.'' [1.25-26]===
:'''Darrell''': Get ready for an extra-special beatdown! 
:'''K.O.''': [Grunts] Powerfist! No! 
''[Darrell punches K.O. when Rad catches him]''
:'''Rad''': Need a hand, kiddo? 
:'''K.O.''': Rad! You’re— 
:'''Rad''': I know, I know. I’m your knight in shining armor. The best of the best. The biceps and the triceps… 
''[Enid dashes through to fight Darrell but Darrell shields himself. Enid finally crashes Darrell sending him flying]''
:'''Enid''': Hyah! Hyah! [Darrell falls to the ground] 
:'''Rad''': Show-off. 
:'''Enid''': Rad, you’re missing the action! 
:'''Rad''': [Sets K.O. down] All right, I’m coming. [Hovers] Yeesh. 
''[Enid and Rad fights Darrell off-screen]''
:'''K.O.''': [Thinking] I spend all my time with cool heroes at the plaza now, but I’m still getting thrashed by Darrells? Why can’t I be strong like Rad and Enid? And how could I call myself a hero when I can’t even shoot a powerfist when I need it? 
----
''[Scene shows an exterior of the Bodega while an alarm is heard. Enid and Rad steps out of the Bodega. A Boxmore box falls from the sky, opening it revealing Darrell]''
:'''Darrell''': Miss me, losers? 
:'''Enid''': We didn’t miss you. We hit you. A lot. Remember? 
:'''Rad''': [Laughs] Whoa! Good one, Enid. Did you get that, K.O.? [Notices K.O. wasn’t in the shot] K.O.? 
:'''Enid''': Mnh-mm. 
:'''Darrell''': [Laughs] Oh, boy. I set you up for that one. It’s cool, though. ‘Cause this time… [Laughs] Oh, just wait. [Turns into a bigger version of himself] This time, I’m gonna get the last laugh! [Launches out several weapons to use] Pretty impressive, huh? Lucky for me, though, I won’t even need to pull punches. [Gets a car and smashes it] Once this cannon charges up, just one blast, and your precious plaza will be obliterated! [Fires up cannon] 
:'''Rad''': I think we might need to get some help for this one. 
:'''Enid''': We stay and fight. 
:'''Rad:''': [Chuckles nervously] That’s another joke, right? 
:'''Enid''': We’ll never make it back in time. Are you with me or not? 
:'''Rad''': Yeah. I’m with you. 
:'''Darrell''': This is it, Lakewood losers! [Enid and Rad prepares] Now… prepare to— [A mysterious figure slices Darrell in half and blows up] 
:'''Rad''': Whoa. [Darrell’s parts falls out and shows K.O.’s alter-ego form, T.K.O.] Dude! That was amazing! 
:'''Enid''': That’s putting it lightly. How did you do that, K.O.?

===''Stop Attacking the Plaza'' [1.27]===
''[Ernesto enters a room where Darrell, Shannon, Raymond, and Jethro are playing a board game.]''
:'''Ernesto''': Hello, little ones. 
:'''Darrell''': Hey, Ernesto! Wanna join us?
:'''Ernesto''': I'm just gonna take this downtime to reeelaaax.
:'''Darrell''': Hmm, yeah. We haven't gotten any orders from Dad in a while. 
:'''Ernesto''': Yeah, he mentioned something about not attacking the plaza for 24 hours or he'll get fired. ''[starts reading newspaper]'' Shame.
:'''Darrell, Shannon, and Raymond''': (gasps)
:'''Darrell''': 24 hours?!
:'''Shannon''': That's...
:'''Raymond''': Terrible! 
:'''Darrell''': Poor Dad! Maybe we should go check on him. Make sure he's okay?
:'''Shannon and Raymond''': Yeah.
----
''[Lord Boxman and his robots are trying to have a family dinner, but Boxman is getting annoyed.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': ENOUGH! Why are you all acting so...strange?
''[Darrell, Shannon, and Raymond look at one another.]''
:'''Darrell''': Well, we know you're not allowed to attack the plaza for a whole day.
:'''Darrell,  Shannon, and Raymond''': You must be truly hurting inside.
:'''Lord Boxman''': Stop! What are you trying to say here? That I'm obsessed?! That I have a...problem?  
''[A thought bubble depicting the plaza appears next to Boxman; he waves it off.]''
:'''Shannon''': Uh, well, yeah. I mean, isn't attacking the plaza kinda, heh, the sole reason we exist?
:'''Raymond''': That is true.
:'''Ernesto''': You got a point there.
:'''Darrell''': Yeah, yeah, I mean, come on. 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Forget you guys! I don't have a problem! You know who has a problem? ''[points to Raymond]'' You with being nosy! I can, too, go a day without attacking the plaza! And I don't need your help to do it! I'll show you all! I'll show ''you''! And I'll show ''you''! And I'll definitely show ''you''... ''[He disappears through a trapdoor in the floor.]''
:'''Jethro''': ''[as he rolls by]'' I am Jethro!
----
''[K.O. is busy mopping the floor, looking bored.]''
:'''K.O.''': (yawns) Man, it's sure been quiet, huh, guys?
''[Rad and Enid are shown sleeping in a bunk bed suspended from the ceiling. The store's door chime dings as Lord Boxman enters. Rad and Enid wake up and change into their normal outfits.]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, finally, a custom-- aah!
''[The trio gets in fighting position.]''
:'''Enid''': What do you want, Boxman? 
:'''Lord Boxman''': You can put those away.
:'''Enid''': ''[takes her foot back]'' Explain. 
''[Boxman pulls out a paper and puts on glasses to read it.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Ahemp. (clears throat) Mi mi mi mi mi miiii. I, uh, Lord Boxman-- me, that is, hereby...vow...to-oo-oo-oo-oo... ''[High-pitched voice]'' stop attacking the plaza. ''[Normal voice]'' Wooow! ''[gets ready to leave]'' That felt great to get that off of my che--
:'''Rad''': ''[stops him]'' Wait a sec! Could you repeat that last part?
:'''Lord Boxman''': D'oh! My bosses say that I can't go a day without attacking you. But! ''[holds up a countdown clock]'' Look at that! One minute left!
:'''Rad''': Seriously? 
:'''Enid''': Oh, come on.  It's 'cause you failed so many times, isn't it?
:'''Lord Boxman''': Nooooo-uh! It's just-- It's driving me crazy and my bosses crazy. So there! Pbbt!
:'''K.O.''': W-what happens if you did attack us?
:'''Lord Boxman'''': I get fired and my business shuts down, why?
:'''Enid''': (sarcastically) Oh, that's so sad. One moment. ''[The trio gets into a huddle.]'' If Boxman attacks us, he'll get fired and leave us alone! ''[They turn back towards him.]'' Fight me, Buttman! 
''[They start poking and teasing him.]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Robots blow!
:'''Enid''': Boxes...are terrible!
:'''K.O.''': ''[hears something on the phone]'' What's that? The president of the universe says all boxes must be replaced with...
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Best friends?! Friendship! Friendship! Friendship! Wow! Yayyyyyyyy! (laughing) 
''[Lord Boxman looks like he's about to snap, but calmly takes a deep breath.]'' 
:'''Lord Boxman''': I have better things to do now than to waste time on you piddling fools. (chuckles) So long, clown babies! Boxman out. (howls) ''[goes outside]''
:'''Enid''': You know, maybe it's for the best. I mean, I don't wanna be the reason that Boxman loses his job.
:'''Rad''': You're right, Enid. Even someone like him doesn't deserve unemployment, just 'cause he's a weird old man. 
:'''K.O.''': We are all very thoughtful and kind, even to our enemies. 
:'''Rad''': Bring it in for a big friend hug.
''[They hug.]''
:'''K.O.''': Mmm! Yay! 
''[The alarm on Boxman's watch beeps, meaning that the 24 hour period is up.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': (laughs evilly) You horrible little brats! ''[tips over a gumball machine]'' Ha-ha-ha-ha! You know what I hate? ''[knocks some jars off of a shelf]'' I-I hate your niceness! He-he. ''[gets up on the counter and spins around]'' Ooh, and I hate your friendliness! (chuckles) ''[Enid gags]'' I hate you kids! ''[kicks the store's rug]'' I hate this bodega! ''[kicks it again]'' I hate Lakewood Plaza Turbo! Bwahaha, yes I do! ''[runs off laughing hysterically]''
----
''[Lord Boxman is in his office with Ernesto.]''
:'''Ernesto''': Sounds like your meeting with Miss Cosma sure went well. You must be glad to be rid of that obsession of yours now, huh?
:'''Lord Boxman''': You know, Ernesto 1701, I learned something interesting about myself in the last 24 hours.
:'''Ernesto''': What's that, sir?
:'''Lord Boxman''': I learned that I don't ''need'' to attack the plaza. ''[gets out a chest and opens it to reveal a button]'' (Evilly) I ''want'' to. ''[pushes the button five times]''
''[Raymond, Darrell, Jethro, Shannon, and Ernesto appear at the plaza and attack K.O., Rad, and Enid.]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': What the?!
''[The robots fight the trio.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Never gets old.

===''We've Got Fleas'' [1.28]===
''[K.O. is unsuccessfully trying to fight Mikayla, an animalistic robot from Boxmore. Rad and Enid arrive in Rad's van and jump out.]''
:'''Enid''': Looks like our normal approach isn't working. 
:'''Rad''': She's too unpredictable. It's like fighting a wild animal.
:'''K.O.''': (gasps) That's it!  In times of need, the hero's noble animal companion always sweeps in to win the day! (whistles) Baby Teeth, come forth!
''[Baby Teeth is shown eating nachos in the store, turns, then goes back to eating. We cut back to K.O. with a tear in his eye.]''
:'''Enid''': Any other bright ideas?
:'''K.O.''': Hmm. Well...maybe ''we'' could become animals. 
:'''Rad''': &quot;Become&quot; animals? How would we do that? 
''[The van's door suddenly swings open, revealing Dendy.]''
:'''Dendy''': It's simple. You just need to be bitten by a were-animal.
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Dendy!
:'''Rad''': What were you doing in my van...?
:'''Dendy''': (shows hologram explaining her speech) A were-animal's fangs secrete a special were-enzyme that activates the bitten's inner beast.
:'''K.O.''': A...were-animal?!
:'''Rad''': (chuckles) I think you mean, &quot;Where ''is'' animal&quot;, K.O. 
:'''K.O.''': (laughs, snorts) Yeah, my bad.
''[Enid grabs Rad and K.O. by the hair to look in the distance]''
:'''Enid''': (looking at Crinkly Wrinkly asleep on a bench a few feet away) There animal! Let's get bit.
:'''Rad and K.O.''': (nod) Hmm!
''[The trio runs up to Crinkly Wrinkly with their arms out and jumping.]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Come on! Bite us! Bite us! Bite us! Bite us!
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': (wakes up, startled) Whaaat?! (wheezes)
''[The trio stops jumping]''
:'''Enid''': Look, I know it sounds strange, but I promise you it's for a good reason-- Owww! (she lifts her arm and Crinkly Wrinkly is biting down on it) Ugh! Get off me, you dusty little creep!
''[Enid shakes him off and he lands in K.O.'s hands]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Why, thank ya, sonny! (bites K.O. on the nose)
:'''K.O.''': (holds nose) Oww!
:'''Rad''': (points and laughs)
''[Crinkly Wrinkly opens his mouth wide and bites down on Rad's outstretched hand]''
:'''Rad''': Aaaah! (throws him off)
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': (lands on bottom) Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! I've been wanting to do that for ages!
:'''Enid''': Wait, you ''wanted'' to bite us?!
:'''Rad''': Ew!
:'''K.O.''': You weren't supposed to like it!
:'''Enid''': (rubs her arm in disgust) Ugh! Blek!
:'''Rad''': That cannot be legal.
''[Crinkly Wrinkly is suddenly on board a bus as it drives past the trio]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Ho Ho Ho! Enjoy your cuuuuurse!
:'''Enid''': Your garbage curse didn't even work, you dank old pillowcase!!!
''[Enid suddenly sprouts a rabbit's tail]''
:'''K.O.''': (points to her) Enid...you have a new ponytail! On your butt!
:'''Enid''': (notices) Oh! Cute! But, I don't think it's a ponytail. It's more of a-- 
''[Her ears change into rabbit ears, her nose turns pink, and she starts growing whiskers. Purple fur starts growing on her hands and arms, then her feet burst out of her shoes and become rabbit's feet.]''
:'''Enid''': (groans, grunts) A bunny! (wiggles her toes) It must be because I'm so... (jumps up in the air and clicks her heels) quick on my feet!
:'''Rad''': Whoa, nice! If your inner animal is fast, then mine must be something totally macho. Like a classic werewolf! (starts growing fur and claws; sprouts a tail) Yeah! I can feel it! (rips shirt off, laughs, then gets a collar with a bell on it) Oh. A cat? Nice. Must be because I'm so... (licks his hand and arm, then slicks back his hair) cleaaan.
:'''K.O.''': Wow! Wow, wow, wow! You guys look so cool! (sprouts a dog's tail) Ah! I can't wait to find out what I'm gonna be! 
:'''Enid and Rad''': A puppy!
:'''Rad''': That is so K.O.! 
:'''Enid''': Of course he's a puppy! (pets K.O. on his head as he grows dog ears and fur) It's perfect, because he's such a good boy! 
:'''Rad''': (starts petting him too) Yeah, who's a good boy?!
:'''K.O.''': Me! Me, me, me!
:'''Enid and Rad''': Yes, you are!
''[Rad is suddenly tackled by Mikayla]''
:'''Enid''': (remembering) Oh, right. Mikayla. Time to use our animal powers to put this monkey business to an end.
:'''Rad''': (while pinned to the ground by Mikayla) Ohhh, she's a monkey? I thought she was some kind of jaguar...guitar...lizard...
''[Rad is about to get scratched by Mikayla, only to get booted by Enid.]''
:'''Enid''': (as she zooms by) Whoooo cares?
:'''Rad''': Well, I'm a little curious.

===''No More Pow Cards'' [1.29]===
''[Dendy and K.O. have broken into the POW Card factory computer room and are being held by a pair of guards. Mr. Cardsley, the company owner, enters the room.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley III''': Put them down, and back away. I’ll take it from here.
:'''Guard''': ''[saluting]'' Yes, Mr. Cardsley III. [leaves]
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': ''[to Dendy and K.O.]'' Now, now, it’s alright. Did you get lost? Tours are back out there, kids!
:'''K.O.''': We are not here for no tour! Well, not today. Right, Dendy?
:'''Dendy''': That is correct.
:'''K.O.''': In fact, we got a bone to pick with you, mister!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Is that so? Alright, I’m all ears.
:'''K.O.''': Mr. Cardsley! All our lives we’ve loved Pow Cards! ''[pulls out his collection]'' See?
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Oh. Very nice.
:'''K.O.''': But then, we found out you don’t let Kappas be recognized as heroes! And that’s the most messed up thing I ever heard! So fix it, (sobbing) plee-eee-ase.
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Well what’s there to fix? I mean, why in the world would Kappas need Pow Cards?
:'''K.O.''': Be...cause! It’s bad to leave them out! Don’t be bad!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': And you’re asking we include them for...what, exactly? Drowning people? Honestly, I’ve never seen a Kappa do anything of significance. Heroic or otherwise, they’re just little monsters. And though we appreciate your feedback here at Pow Industries, this is the system we’ve used for decades. There’s no need to change a thing.
:'''K.O.''': But can’t you see how much it upsets us?!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': (sighs) Look, I'm sorry you’re so upset, kid, but it’s the simple truth.
:'''K.O.''': It’s nowhere near the truth! My friend Dendy here does great things all the time! And- and-! ...Do you even know any Kappas, Mr. Cardsley?
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': I...uhhh...Guards!
:'''Guards''': Yessir!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Please escort these trespassers off the premises.
:'''Guards''': Yessir!
:'''K.O.''': Still? After all my tears?
:'''Dendy''': Please wait...Once more.
:'''Guards''': Aw, c’mon! Just...wanna cuff...so baa-aa-aad! ''[They roll away sobbing]''
:'''Dendy''': Mr. Cardsley. Have you ever considered the reason the world does not view Kappas as heroic is because we don’t have any heroes of our own to look up to? And for those that are out there doing something you’d call noteworthy, we’ll never get to notice, if your computer doesn’t, either. All I request is for us to be given a chance.
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': (sighs) Fine. If you insist on learning the hard way. Carla!
:'''Carla''': ''[gets brought down on a crane]'' Greetings, Mr. Cardsley!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Carla, my trusty engineer. Can you temporarily allow the hero-puter to detect the Kappa species?
:'''Carla''': I’d love to! Just gimme one minute… ''[A cord shoots from Dendy's hack-pack and connects to the computer.]'' Ooh!
:'''Dendy''': Pardon, I’ve already written an override code for your system.
:'''Carla''': I...just making sure you’re not trying any funny business! (chuckles) It would’ve taken me forever to write this code! Please, press away!
''[Dendy activates the override code. The computer beeps, but then the beeps die out.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Ohh. Sorry, kids. Like I said, Kappa- aaah!
:'''Carla''': Wow!
''[Tons of Kappa suddenly appear on the world map shown on screen.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': What the-? ''[picks up a new Pow Card]'' Hot hot hot hot hot! How can this be? I - was - wrong? I. Can’t. Process. I was - always told I’m right! I - ''[begins sucking his thumb]''
:'''Carla''': Oh, this is fantastic! Our database is flooded with new profiles! Sales have gone through the roof! A new market of Kappas are buying our Pow Cards in droves! This is the biggest sale in the history of the company, Mr. Cardsley!
:'''Employee''': Sir! There’s no place to hold all the Technos!
''[Technos burst through the door. The group is swept away by them into the main hallway.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': ''[to Dendy]'' Young lady. Dendy, was it?
:'''Dendy''': Yes.
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Dendy, you’ve really taught me something here today. I thank you. And from now on, Pow Cards will recognize the heroic feats of Kappas across the globe! Grandfather would be proud...of how much money we’re making! ''[dives into the pile of Technos]'' Wheee-hee-hee! Woo hoo!

===''A Hero’s Fate'' [1.30]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''Let’s Have a Stakeout'' [1.31]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''Rad Likes Robots'' [1.32]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''KO's Video Channel'' [1.33]===
''[Rad and Enid are watching one of K.O.'s online videos. K.O. is wearing a hoodie with Dendy standing in the background.]''
:'''K.O.''': Hi, guys. I'm here with a special guest, my friend, Dendy. (Dendy waves to camera) She says she has an amazing discovery to show you guys.
''[The scene cuts to Dendy staring into a room with her hands pressed on the window]''
:'''K.O.''': Where are we? Who-- Whose house is this?
:'''Dendy''': Shh! Every morning at exactly 6:15... (gasps) It is happening! Get ready, K.O.! 
''[Rad is shown in his underwear, scratching his butt, and levitating towards a pullup bar in the doorway]''
:'''K.O.''': This is Rad's house? 
''[Dendy watches with a smile on her face as Rad does some pullups]''
:'''K.O.''': Dendy!
:'''Rad''': (turns around) Huh? 
:'''Dendy''': Run!
''[The scene shows Dendy and K.O.'s feet as they run away]''
:'''Dendy''': (laughs)
:'''K.O.''': Dendy, why?
''[Rad sits on the counter in shock at the video he had just watched, while Enid is on the floor laughing]''
:'''Enid''': (laughs) Did that one have enough Radicles for ya? (laughs)

===''The Power is Yours'' [1.34]===

===''Glory Days'' [1.35]===

===''Plazalympics'' [1.36]===

===''Parents Day'' [1.37]===
''[Rad and K.O. are driving around, trying to spy on Enid]''
:'''Rad''': Enid's house should be on this block.
:'''K.O.''': (while looking through the glove compartment) How do you know where Enid lives?
:'''Rad''': I took a look at her personnel file, that's how. 
:'''K.O.''': Hey! That's sneaky!
:'''Rad''': Then I guess you don't want to know any super cool secret facts about Enid, like her favorite color?
''[K.O. tries to resist the curiosity, but can't]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, what is it?! Green?!
:'''Rad''': It's...purple. 
:'''K.O.''': Whoa!
:'''Rad''': (stops the van, looks out the window) K.O., I think this is it! 
:'''K.O.''': Huh?
''[Enid is walking down the street, carrying a duffel bag]''
:'''K.O.''': (gasps) Look, here she comes! 
:'''Rad''': Wait, she's not stopping. 
:'''K.O.''': Where's she going?
''[Enid arrives at a spooky-looking house as thunder crashes overhead]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': What?
''[Enid looks around before reaching into the duffel bag]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': Wha?!
''[Enid pulls a witch's hat out of the duffel bag, puts it on, and is enveloped in a puff of purple smoke. When the dust settles, she is dressed as a witch.]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': (scream)
''[Enid enters the house, leaving K.O. and Rad in shock]''
:'''K.O.''': Whoa! Enid's going trick-or-treating without us?
:'''Rad''': (groans)
''[K.O. and Rad peek through a window to look for Enid]''
:'''K.O.''': Do you see Enid? 
''[A bat flies into the room]''
:'''Rad''': Wait, look!
''[The bat changes into a woman and she fixes her hair]''
:'''Rad''': Enid's mom is...a hot vampire? 
''[A purple-furred werewolf walks up to the woman and kisses her]''
:'''Rad''': And her dad is a hot werewolf? 
:'''K.O.''': Enid's parents are ninjas ''and'' monsters? 
:'''Rad''': I don't think they're ninjas. 
:'''K.O.''': But, why would Enid lie to us?
:'''Enid''': (suddenly appearing at the window) 'Cause it's none of your business, you goons.
:'''K.O. and Rad''': (scream)
:'''Enid''': Shh! You guys need to get out of here.
:'''K.O.''': You said your parents were busy ninjas, but they were just kissing and aren't ninjas. 
:'''Enid''': My family is embarrassing and I like to keep my private life private.  So, you need to go before they see you and--
:'''Wilhamena''': (arrives at the window) Enid! You have guests! Please join us for dinner. 
''[Enid shakes her head as she stares at her friends with skulls in her eyes, motioning for them to say no. K.O. and Rad look at each other.]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': We'd love to! 
:'''Enid''': Grrrrrrrrr!

===''We Got Hacked'' [1.38]===
:'''K.O.''': Dendy! Dendy, Dendy, Dendy, Dendy! We got... we got problems! 
:'''Dendy''': Hmm. I understand your predicament. (pointing to Gar) Mr. Gar here is overcompensating for his receding hairline with muscles. 
:'''Mr. Gar''': (angrily) Hey! 
:'''Dendy''': (pointing to Rad) Rad is pretending to be super macho, even though he's a big softy. 
:'''Rad''': (embarrassed) Th-That's not true! 
:'''Dendy''': (pointing to the broken mop) We have a cleaning apparatus with a tacky design. 
''[The mop deflates]''
:'''Dendy''': (pointing to Enid who is acting indifferent while picking her nose) Or perhaps, is it how Enid acts super cool because she's internally struggling with her identity. 
:'''Enid''': (embarrassed and puffing her cheeks out) Uh, uh, uh... Absolutely not! 
:'''Dendy''': Hmm. Ah, it must be- 
''[Mr. Gar picks up Dendy]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': The dang mop is malfunctioning! 
''[He drops her to the ground and walks off]''

===''Back in Red Action'' [1.39]===

===''Let's Take a Moment'' [1.40]===

===''Villains' Night Out'' [1.41]===

===''Villains' Night In'' [1.42]===

===''Let's Watch the Pilot'' [1.43]===
''[The episode starts off with montage of Crinkly Wrinkly interviewing a couple of guests.]''
:'''Announcer''': Welcome to “Stage Left,” with Crinkly Wrinkly.
''[Audience cheers and applause. Dynamite Watkins comes in to hit Crinkly Wrinkly with a chair. The titlecard appears. The cameraman gets ready for Dynamite Watkins to host.]''
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': I’m Dynamite Watkins! Your host for tonight--
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': My neck!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': For tonight’s highly-anticipated retrospective! Fans of the smash hit TV series, “OK K.O.: Let’s Be Heroes,” prepare to lose your cool! Joining us today is… Enid! ''[Enid comes onstage]'' Rad! ''[Comes onstage as well]''
:'''Rad''': Please donate to my charity-- Tiny Clothes for Tiny Dinos.
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': And K.O.! ''[Audience cheers louder as he comes onstage]''
:'''Audience''': K.O.! K.O.! K.O.!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Wow! ''[K.O. gives kisses]'' K.O. is clearly the crowd favorite. No surprise there. That kid’s a show-stealer! So, “OK K.O.” has taken the world by storm! It’s number one on every network. (Dramatically) And in all our hearts. Did you three ever expect it to become such an explosive success?!
:'''Enid''': Well, I don’t know about the others, but from the very beginning, I could just, like, sense the material was really special, you know?
:'''Rad''': Yeah, I have--
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Well, that’s great. I’ve actually got a relic that can take us all back to the beginning you spoke of. The original pilot-- ''[shows the relic]'' &quot;Lakewood Plaza Turbo&quot;!
:'''Enid, K.O., and Rad''': What?!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': That’s right-- the pilot! And I don’t mean the sap that flies your plane. ''[Displays what a pilot is]'' I’m talking a short sample episode that’s made to test the waters and see if it’s something people would want to watch more of. Right, K.O.?
:'''K.O.''': Well, yeah, but… we’ve come a really long way since the pilot, and it’s not at all representative of our current work, so…
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Whoo, &quot;Lakewood Plaza Turbo&quot;!
''[Audience cheers and applause as the pilot starts airing.]''
:'''Announcer''': In the year, 201X, ''[Displays the robots of Boxmore]'' Lord Boxman opened a store to arm his robot hoard. ''[Cuts to Lakewood Plaza Turbo and the heroes preparing to fight]'' But the heroes of Lakewood Plaza--
:'''Rad and Singing voice''': ♪Are ready to fight!♪
:'''Rad''': (laughs) Oh, man! Remember this old theme song?
:'''K.O. and Singing voice''': ♪K.O., Rad, and Enid are in battle mode♪
:'''Enid and Singing voice''': ♪Punch and kick the bad guys till they all explode♪
:'''K.O., Enid, Rad, and Singing voice''': ♪Power up and fight. Let’s watch an episode of Lakewood Plaza Turbo!♪ ''[K.O. says OK K.O. instead of Plaza Turbo. Rad laughs after he messed up.]''
:'''Rad''': We have fun. Ha-- the plaza looked so different back then.
:'''K.O.''': Whoa! We look so weird.
:'''Enid''': Ugh-- my hair! Sorry. This is just, um… really weird to watch now.
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': It sure is! Please feel free to react out loud during the whole thing.
:'''Enid’s voice''': He’s sleeping again.
''[Rad snores and K.O. dumps ice cream on him.]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) Rad got so cold underneath all that ice cream, they had to call in a stunt double!
''[Audience laughs]''
:'''Rad''': Ha. Well, uh, I was on a cleanse, so my skin was super sensitive.
:'''K.O.’s voice''': You looked so peaceful, like a baby lamb.
''[Mega Football Baby and Sparko laughs]''
:'''Enid’s voice''': Gee!
''[Pilot K.O. does something weird with his mouth.]''
:'''Rad''': Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is going on with your mouth there?
:'''K.O.''': It’s an old theater trick we call “jawning.” It, um… keeps the jaw nice and loose, even when you’re not talking.
:'''Rad’s voice''': Ooh! ''[Prepares to shoot K.O. with his finger]''
:'''Rad''': Oh! Did my own stunt here. Shout-out to the effects team.
''[Pilot K.O. grunts]''
:'''Rad’s voice''': It’s just the power poke. You know, a special move?
:'''K.O.’s voice''': “Special move”? Okay, my turn!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': So, K.O., I sense a little conflict between you and Rad here.
:'''K.O.''': Yeah, you know, in this episode, I think he’s the bad guy. But-- spoiler alert-- turns out he’s not the bad guy, and it was totally some other dude. Ha-- the stories can’t get too complicated in pilots.
''[Crowd laughs when K.O. doesn’t do his “special move”]''
:'''K.O.’s voice''': Yeah, well… I’ll soil you!
''[K.O. and Rad fight]''
:'''Enid’s voice''': Cool it!
:'''Crowd''': Fight, fight!
:'''Enid’s voice''': I said, “Cool it!” ''[Uses her power kick]''
:'''K.O.''': Ooh. Enid’s outfit change really was for the best.
:'''Enid''': (chuckles nervously) Well… it was challenging. But the material called for a loin-flap, and I think meeting that challenge made me a stronger performer.
:'''Mr. Gar’s voice''': No! ''[pounds the ground]''
:'''Enid’s voice''': Boss, what happ-- ''[trips on her loin-flap]'' Whoa!
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) Remember how often you’d trip over that thing? ''[Enid continues tripping over her loin-flap]''
:'''Enid''': What?! Why would you show that?!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Just cut in a few bloopers to spice things up.

===''Mystery Science Fair 201X'' [1.44]===
''[Dendy and K.O. are trading Paw Cards before class starts]''
:'''Dendy''': Okay, then I will trade you for your… Limited edition Cowboy Darrell!
:'''K.O.''': (Laughs) No way! He’s, like, the rarest villain card I own!
:'''Dendy''': That is not true. You also have… ''[points to the Shadowy Figure Pow Card]'' this one!
:'''K.O.''': Oh. Um, yeah… ''[tries to hide that Pow Card]'' I forgot.
:'''Dendy''': Shadowy Figure never did return after last time, did he?
:'''K.O.''': I think we’ve seen the last of him. Uh, what if I trade you… ''[tries to trade one of his Pow Cards]''
:'''Dendy''': And what of your… turbonic form?
:'''K.O.''': Y-you mean T.K.O.? Well, I guess he’s still inside me somewhere? I-I don’t like thinking about it.
:'''Dendy''': How very fascinating.
:'''Classmate''': Everybody pipe down, will ya?! I think teach is comin-- ''[Miss Quantum slams the door on the kid]''
:'''Miss Quantum''': Morning, class. Everyone have a good weekend?
:'''Classmates''': Yes, Miss Quantum.
:'''Miss Quantum''': Well, that's great, ‘cause I spent mine failing all of your quizzes again! ''[tosses the quizzes]'' What is wrong with all of you?! Did any of you even try?
''[A clock is ticking, a slow fart is heard and classmates laugh]''
:'''Miss Quantum''': Okay, that’s fine. You kids think you’re just too clever for quizzes. Well, in that case, I’ll be looking forward to all your brilliant submissions to this year’s… ''[pulls out a laser gun and blasts words on the chalkboard]'' Mystery Science Fair 201X! ''[The title card appears and the chalkboard falls]''
:'''Nanini''': ''[raises hand]'' But, Miss Quantum, I thought you-- 
''[A buzzer is heard and books fall on her]''
:'''Miss Quantum''': What have I told you about raising your hand? ''[Nanini raises her hand]'' Yes, Nanini?
:'''Nanini''': I thought you said the science fair was optional.
:'''Miss Quantum''': Oh! Oh, I did say that, didn’t I? ''[breathes fire]'' Well, I changed my mind! You are all now required to submit a project for the fair… by tomorrow!
''[Classmates groan]''
:'''Genesis''': That’s so unfair! There’s not enough time!
:'''Miss Quantum''': Oh, quit your boo-hooin’ and get crackin’. Unless, of course, you’d rather be suspended from school like poor Lil’ Bobo out there.
''[Bobo is shown to be tied up and literally suspending from school]''
:'''Bobo''': Boo-hoo. Boo-hoo. Boo-hoo.
:'''Miss Quantum''': The winner will receive a blue ribbon and extra credit. ''[shows a hologram of a blue ribbon]'' But I must warn you, I’m not easily impressed. Dendy. ''[glares at Dendy]'' Now get to work!
:'''K.O.''': Oh! What do we do?!
:'''Dendy''': Do not worry, K.O.. I have the perfect idea for our project. 
''[A cheering sound effect is heard]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, Dendy! What’s it gonna be about?
:'''Dendy''': Unleashing T.K.O..
:'''K.O.''': Wait, what!?
''[Bell rings. K.O. is seen dragging himself to Dendy’s legs]''
:'''K.O.''': (crying) Dendy, why?! ''[sobs and sniffles]''
:'''Dendy''': (sighs) Allow me to explain. ''[shows a demonstration of their science fair]'' You, K.O., are the only person I know with the ability to harness energy as T.K.O.! If I could identify what it is exactly that triggers your turbonic transformation, it’d be a scientific breakthrough!
:'''K.O.''': But it’s scary bein’ T.K.O.! I lose all control! (gasps) What if I hurt someone again?! What if I hurt you?!
:'''Dendy''': Oh, K.O., I assure you ''[opens locker]'' we will be perfectly safe in a controlled environment, using only state-of-the art equipment. Now, please, step inside.
:'''K.O.''': Mm! Okay, Dendy, I trust you. ''[steps inside the locker]'' Just no needles or anything, okay?

===''RMS &amp; Brandon's First Episode'' [1.45]===
''[Mad Sam has just threatened RMS and Brandon to frame his helmet.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': (sighs) Here we are again, fearing for our lives, framing-- ''[Grabs the helmet]'' gah-- junk. I like hanging out with you all the time, but don’t you ever feel… trapped?
:'''Brandon''': Speak for yourself! Despite the couple wackos, this place rules! Plus, it’s like the easiest job in the world!
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Is it, though?
:'''Brandon''': Yeah! Everything’s easy with you around! Now, let’s get to work… after I take a nap.
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Huh? ''[Brandon hops on the counter with newspapers to nap.]'' Now? ''[Brandon snores]'' But we gotta frame Mad Sam’s helmet! I just don’t get paid enough for any of this! Look at him… so peaceful. Not a care in the world. Must be nice to be so willfully complacent. Huh?
''[Newsprint reads “Looking 4 Bigger and Better Things?” Zooms in to “Coffee Shop Looking 4 Barista Apply Now!!!!! Zooms in another text.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': &quot;25 more pennies an hour&quot;? This could be just what I need to get out of this funk. Watching Brandon sleep can be fun sometimes, but maybe it’s time for me to move up in the world! Sorry, Brandon, but I’ve gotta get that job! 
''[Scene cuts to A Real Magic Skeleton filling a resume on a computer.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Well, let’s see. Special skills. Uh… Framing proficien--Ugh, no, that’s dumb. Does magic count as a special skill? ''[A clang sound is heard.]'' Maybe I should-- ''[Another clang sound is heard.]'' Wha-- ''[And another. RMS' head is enveloped in purple flames.]'' Ooh, my geez, why?! What are you doing?!
:'''Brandon''': I’m trying to get Mad Sam’s helmet in this display case. ''[Slams the helmet]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Ugh! ''[Brandon slams again]'' You’re driving me nuts! Brandon, my dude, I love you, but I’m so glad I’m applying for a new job.
:'''Brandon''': New job?!
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Yep! And with the extra 25 pennies a week, it’ll only take me, like… 2,000 years to become a millionaire! And once I have that much money, I’ll be able to do the things I always dreamed of. 
''[He dreams of buying a steak with bone.]''
:'''Employee''': Here ya go.
''[RMS gets his order and leaves a dollar in the tips jar. Cut back to the present.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Ahh!
:'''Brandon''': So you’re just gonna turn your back on all the cool stuff we do here? Like when we duct-taped each other to the walls? Or that time I took all your bones and hid them around the store.
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': I didn’t like when you did that! I need my bones.
:'''Brandon''': Well, what about the time we thought we were level 100 and fought Big Darrell. ''[Imagines fighting Big Darrell]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': That was K.O..
:'''Brandon''': Okay, well, still… our jobs are great! Think about how sweet our future will be, working here together, forever. ''[Echos]'' Forever… forever… forever.
''[Imagines Crinkly Wrinkly burying Brandon and him in the store.]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly and Brandon''': Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo!
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': (shudders) ''[He checks his phone to see Drupe messaging him.]'' Mm. Come on. Drupe picked up some sour candy.
:'''Brandon''': Oh, whoo! Whoo, whoo, whoo!

===''Lad and Logic'' [1.46]===

===''OK Dendy! Let's Be K.O.!'' [1.47]===
''[The evil robot attack alarm goes off]''
''[We're shown Gar's Bodega getting on defense mode as Potato and Holo Jane flee, multiple screams can be heard in the background]''
:'''Cookie Man''': [Hands up his face] EVIL ROBOT ATTACK! 
''[A Boxmore robot box falls from the sky, Enid and Rad hurry outside the Bodega and Dendy follows behind while humming and walking on a much slower pace. The box's walls fall only to reveal the robot sent in by Boxman is Ernesto.]''
:'''Ernesto''': [Nervously reading to himself the lines he's supposed to use off some papers] Uh... Okay... Greetings Lakewood, I am Ernesto, here from Boxmore... Your demise.... [He hums to himself before realizing he's already supposed to be fighting] OH! UM. [Quickly glances over at his papers] Greetings! Plaza!-.. Uh-..[Looks at his papers again] Turbians. I am... [Looks at his papers again] Ernesto. The... Uh-.. Boxmore business bot. [Puts his canon arm up] And I am here.. To, uh, destroy... [Points his canon arm at the heroes but nothing happens, so he awkwardly moves it up and down to try to get it to work. The only thing to come out of the canon is air. Ernesto grows tense] Your plaza! 
:'''Rad''': This is sad. 
:'''Enid''': [Pats Dendy on the head] Don't worry about this chump, Dendy. We'll handle him. [Winks at Dendy and puts her thumb up] 
:'''Dendy''': Okay! 
''[Enid and Rad prepare themselves to attack Ernesto]''
:'''Dendy''': [Thinking] No... I'm filling-in for K.O., and K.O. would not simply chill at the prospect of battle. [Speaking] I must consult the list to see what he'd do! [Looks at K.O.'s schedule] &quot;Learn life lesson&quot;! I see! This is the climax of K.O.'s day, where he learns something wholesome. I've been trying to imitate K.O. this whole time but maybe the lesson I learned and, therefore, the secret of defeating this robot, is just to be myself! [Thinking] Yeah... That sounds correct. [Speaking] Ernesto! 
:'''Rad and Enid''': What?! 
:'''Dendy''': For a business bot, you're very inefficient. You haven't laid a single attack on the Plaza since you landed. 
:'''Ernesto''': W-Well... I was about to get there. 
:'''Dendy''': No! Over rot speeches and flimsy weapons are tools of lesser robots. As a business bot you should set aside those inferior tactics and just cut to the chase. 
:'''Ernesto''': Ha, maybe you're right! I don't need to copy the other robots to destroy the Plaza! I'm just gonna BE MYSELF! [He turns into a ball with only his arms out as some jazz music starts playing, then, using his arms' help he jumps backwards and becomes a full ball] 
''[ Rad and Enid exclaim as they jump in order to dodge Ernesto's attack, Dendy gets run over by the robot and then is punched into the ground.]''
:'''Rad''': Dendy! Why'd you give him constructive criticism?! That just made him stronger! 
:'''Enid''': [Groans] Who cares! [She jumps back into action and prepares to air-kick Ernesto] He's not strong enough for this! 
''[Enid's attack cuts Ernesto in half]''
:'''Rad''': Nice, Enid! 
''[Suddenly both of Ernesto's halves start chasing after Enid and Dendy, Rad is able to use his levitation beam to stop them from hitting his friends]''
:'''Enid''': Oh-oh! Rad! 
:'''Rad''': I gotcha! 
''[Ernesto's limbs break the beam and his arms grab Rad by the waist, knocking him on the ground over and over until finally sticking him down for good]''
:'''Rad''': [Groans while immobilized] 
:'''Enid''': Rad! 
''[Ernesto's foot kicks Enid in the face just as she calls out for her friend's name, making her fall on the ground. Enid yells as she kicks Ernesto's legs, while he kicks back. She manages to throw the lower half of Ernesto into the sky but it comes back and smashes her on the ground]''
:'''Rad''': [Is unable to free himself from Ernesto's grip] HOW ARE WE LOSING?! [Gets slapped by Ernesto's tie] 
:'''Enid''': [Struggling to defend herself from Ernesto's attacks] We-... Need-... K.O.! 
:'''Dendy''': [Thinking] I see! Being my normal self isn't enough. They don't need Dendy right now... [Speaking] They need K.O.! And if K.O. is not here, [Stares at her holographic screen] I must become K.O. in my own way! [Starts typing things out on her screen, and takes on the shape of a giant K.O.] Untend them Ernesto! They're not your opponent, I AM! 
''[Ernesto throws both Enid and Rad into the air and prepares to fight Dendy, he throws a punch at her but she grabs his first and pushes him back. Ernesto nearly loses balance but then he goes and tries to punch Dendy again, she manages to punch him first which throws him onto the ground. Ernesto quickly gets up and runs towards her, she tries to punch him but he blocks her attack. The two start throwing punches at each other but neither seem to be able to hit the other. Finally, Dendy manages to punch Ernesto in the stomach which throws him on the ground.]''
:'''Ernesto''': Oh... Jeez... Just being myself isn't helping to destroy the Plaza either! [Closes his one eye in shame] My failure figures are skyrocketing. 
:'''Dendy''': [Is breathing heavily because of the tiresome fight she just went through] Ernesto... We should appreciate the irony of this situation, I thought I needed to be myself, [Puts her hand on her chest] but I needed to copy someone else in my own way. 
:'''Ernesto''': Uh?.. Is this still about my thing? 
:'''Dendy''': No. [Punches Ernesto back into Boxmore] 
:'''Rad''': Dendy! THAT WAS AMAZING!!! 
:'''Enid''': Yeah! You should fill-in for K.O. everyday!!! 
:'''Dendy''': [Sighs] No, thank you! I thought I knew everything about K.O., but it seems the one thing I do not understand is how he does this everyday. This job is very tiring... Besides, I think it's best to leave being K.O., to the real K.O.. 
''[A bus titled &quot;Old Folks Home&quot; suddenly pulls over and K.O. gets out of it while wearing a red shirt that reads &quot;worlds' gratest grampso n&quot; and with three balloons on his hand]''
:'''K.O.''': Hi, guys! I'm back! What'd I miss? 
:'''Rad and Enid''': K.O.!! [start talking at the same time about their battle against Ernesto and Dendy's help] 
''[Dendy checks out the item &quot;tender moment&quot; off K.O.'s schedule and the episode ends]''

===''Plaza Shorts'' [1.48]===

===''Let's Not Be Skeletons'' [1.49]===

===''Action News'' [1.50]===

===''The Perfect Meal'' [1.51]===

===''Hope This Flies'' [1.52]===
''[Rad and Red Action are racing each other and just zoomed by a trailer park. Red is in the lead.]''
:'''Rad''': Stupid mobile suburbs! ''[He and Red enter Rumble Range]'' Now that we’re out of that maze, there’s no way I’ll lose. ''[Catches up to Red]''
:'''Red Action''': Man, you must like the taste of my dust!
:'''Rad''': ''[Licks the dust]'' Not bad. Could use some more debris an-- Hey! (grumbles) I’ll show you! ''[Tries to move his stick-shift higher]'' No! I’m already going as fayste as I can! ''[Slowing down]'' We’re already going through Rumble Range! At this rate, Red’s gonna win. Eh. What the-- ''[Sees the Dendysoft Help System]'' I don’t remember adding this. ''[Pushes a button where a holographic form of Dendy appears.]''
:'''Dendy''': Greetings, operator.
:'''Rad''': Aah! Demon! Don’t eat-- Dendy?!
:'''Dendy''': A facsimile of Dendy, and as such, I’m programmed to help in a variety of ways.
:'''Rad''': You snuck into ''my'' van and messed with ''my'' stuff?!
:'''Dendy''': Please select a--
:'''Rad''': I don’t want your help! ''[Smashes the help system]'' I just gotta… um… That’s it! The volcano! While she’s comin’ ''round'' the mountain, I’ll be going ''over'' it. I’m a smart booooooy! ''[Drives to the volcano]''
:'''Enid''': ''[As a note]'' False.
:'''Rad''': Time to fly. Launching the Rad Wing. ''[The wing, which is just a giant paper airplane, replaces the rocket launcher. Flies over the volcano.]'' Engaging thrusters. Y-e-e-es! I did it! I-- ''[The thruster burns the wing.]'' Noooooooooo! ''[The van falls into the volcano, plummeting to the lava.]'' Aaaaaaaaaaah!
:'''Dendy''': Perhaps ''I'' can be of assistance.
:'''Rad''': Demon! Dendy? How long have you been there?
:'''Dendy''': The entire time.
:'''Rad''': ''[grabs Dendy]'' Well, don’t just sit there adorably. Help!
:'''Dendy''': You… want my help?
:'''Rad''': Oh, Dendy, I shouldn’t have refused your help before. And now it’s my fault we’re gonna take a lava bath. I’ll do ''anything'' to atone.
:'''Dendy''': Stick your finger in the ignition.
:'''Rad''': Okay-- if it’ll atone.
:'''Dendy''': No, Radicles. You can use your beam power to fuel the zero-point energy engine I secretly installed.
:'''K.O.''': ''[As a note]'' I helped!
:'''Rad''': Oh, okay. That makes sense. ''[Takes off the keys and stick his finger to the ignition and uses his beam power. The van levitates away from the lava.]'' I did it! I did it, I did it, I did it!
:'''Dendy''': Aren’t you forgetting something?
:'''Rad''': Oh, yeah. Y-You, uh… helped.
:'''Dendy''': The race!
:'''Rad''': (gasps deeply) ''[Drives around the volcano]'' But there’s no way we’ll catch up! ''[His van flies through]''
:'''Dendy''': That’s not entirely true.
''[Enid leans on a pole of the finish line texting.]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Waves flags]'' Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
:'''Dendy''': I may have made some more secret mods to your van. ''[Pushes the faystest button to upgrade Rad’s van.]''
:'''Red Action''': Whoa! Cool!
''[Rad's van zooms past Red's tank.]''
:'''Rad''': We’re… gonna… win!
:'''K.O.''': Whoo-hoo-hoo!
:'''K.O. and Enid''': Aah!
''[The van flies by the finish line and Rad pushes the brakes, but it doesn’t stop.]''
:'''Rad''': Why aren’t we stopping?!
:'''Dendy''': I had counted on you accepting my help much sooner!
''[The van crashes into the Bodega and sets it on fire. K.O. drives his go-kart and Red Action drives her tank to see.]''
:'''Enid''': ''[Takes off sunglasses]'' Rad!
:'''K.O.''': Dendy!
''[Dendy carries Rad out of the mess.]''
:'''Enid, K.O., and Red Action''': Whew!
:'''Rad''': (groans) Wha… My van!
:'''Dendy''': Do not worry, Radicles. We will repair your van. Besides, you won the race.
:'''Rad''': No, Dendy. ''We'' won. Did we-- Did we blow up the bodega?
:'''Dendy''': ''[Whispering]'' Shh! Don’t draw attention to us.

===''You're in Control'' [1.53–54]===

== [[OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes (Season 2)|Season 2]] ==

===''Seasons Change'' [2.01]===

===''Lord Cowboy Darrell'' [2.02]===

===''Plaza Film Festival'' [2.03]===

===''Be A Team'' [2.04]===

===''My Fair Carol'' [2.05]===

===''Let's Watch the Boxmore Show'' [2.06]===

===''Your World is an Illusion'' [2.07]===

===''The So-Bad-ical'' [2.08]===

===''Point to the Plaza'' [2.09]===

===''TKO's House'' [2.10]===

===''Red Action to the Future'' [2.11]===

===''Dendy's Power'' [2.12]===

===''Special Delivery'' [2.13]===

===''Wisdom, Strength and Charisma'' [2.14]===

===''Bittersweet Rivals'' [2.15]===
 
===''Are You Ready for Some Megafootball?!'' [2.16]===

===''Mystery Sleepover'' [2.17]===

===''Crossover Nexus'' [2.18]===
:'''K.O.''': Hey, what's this spooky dump? And where are my friends?
:'''Strike''': I am Strike. Howdy, hero -- and toodle loo!
:'''K.O.''': What, me?! I-I'm still just a hero in training.
:'''Strike''': Yeah, I don't care. ''[activates his pen to destroy K.O. as he whimpers but Garnet saves him just in time]''
:'''K.O.''': Huh? Wha-- Who?
:'''Garnet''': No time for introductions.
:'''Ben Tennyson''': Guys, this way! Come on!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Four Arms''': It's hideous!
:'''K.O.''': Huh? Who are all these guys?
:'''Garnet''': They must be heroes that couldn't escape Strike's…strike. Let's keep moving.
:'''Four Arms''': Man, if Strike X'ed all these guys, he must be may stronger than I thought.
:'''K.O.''': If all these heroes couldn't stop him, what could the three of us possibly do?
:'''Raven''': ''[off-screen]'' Do what he isn't expecting, and go to his lair.
:'''K.O.''': That's a great idea, Garnet!
:'''Garnet''': I didn't say anything, K.O.
:'''K.O.''': Ben?
:'''Four Arms''': Dude, did that honestly sound like my voice to you?
:'''Raven''': I said it.
:'''K.O.''': ''[gasps as he sees her stuck to the wall]'' A hero!
:'''Raven''': Hi.
:'''K.O.''': ''[runs over and tries to get her unstuck]'' You've got X'ed by Strike, but you can still talk and stuff?
:'''Raven''': I got protection spell off just before he X'ed me. ''[Garnet punches the wall with her gauntlet, freeing her]'' Thanks…you?
:'''Garnet''': Garnet.
:'''K.O.''': K.O.!
:'''Four Arms''': Four Arms -- and Ben -- and, like, a bunch of other guys, too --
:'''Garnet''': ''[covers Four Arms' mouth]'' We need to know who you are and what this place is.
:'''Raven''': I'm part of a group of superheroes called the Teen Titans. My name's Raven. Uh, excuse me? ''[&quot;Magician&quot; changes to &quot;half-Azarathian, half-demon sorceress&quot;]'' That's better. Before I got X'ed out, I learned this used to be a great city of heroes, but Strike appeared and stole everyone's powers. He was still hungry, so he started summoning heroes from other dimensions to destroy. If we don't stop him, there'll be no heroes left…anywhere.
:'''K.O.''': But why would he do something so cob-darn awful?
:'''Raven''': Eh, it's his thing. It's what he does. He's like evil, you know pure evil or whatever.
:'''Four Arms''': Seems like this dude always has the element of surprise.
:'''Garnet''': Maybe we should surprise him, and ambush him at his lair.
:'''Raven''': That was literally the first thing I said.
:'''K.O.''': Raven, wanna join us?
:'''Raven''': Eh, I don't know. I was having such a great time as a lifeless statue.
:'''K.O.''': ''[hugs Raven joyfully]'' Ooh, a new friend! You can be the brains of our team.
:'''Raven''': As usual.
:'''K.O.''': Hey, Raven? Where is this evil lair anyway?
:'''Raven''': Over there -- the giant fortress just past the impassable chasm.
:'''K.O.''': Oh, okay. Neat.
:'''Raven''': Ehh. Still smarter than Beast Boy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ben Tennyson''': Hey, jerk!
:'''Strike''': What?
:'''Raven, K.O., Garnet, and Ben Tennyson''': OK Ben Let's Go Universe!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ben Tennyson''': My Omnitrix! Why isn't this thing working?!
:'''K.O.''': Ben! It's okay! Your Omni-thingy was made with Strike's power, and he has the power to summon any hero into this world.
:'''Ben Tennyson''': (''chuckles'') I see where your going with this. It's Hero Time!
:'''K.O.''': You just need… a power fist! Because my penis is way more powerful than stupid shrek!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ben Tennyson''': Well, time to get going. Bye, guys! Gwen's gonna flip when she hears about this.

===''Monster Party'' [2.19]===

===''Super Black Friday'' [2.20]===

===''Final Exams'' [2.21]===

===''Soda Genie'' [2.22]===

===''Carol Quest'' [2.23]===

===''Plaza Alone'' [2.24]===

===''Boxman Crashes'' [2.25]===

===''All in the Villainy'' [2.26]===

===''Sidekick Scouts'' [2.27]===

===''Whacky Jaxxyz'' [2.28]===

===''Project Ray Way'' [2.29]===

===''I Am Jethro'' [2.30]===

===''GarQuest'' [2.31]===

===''Gar Trains Punching Judy'' [2.32]===

===''Beach Episode'' [2.33]===

===''OK A.U.! Alternate Universe'' [2.34]===

===''K.O.'s Health Week'' [2.35]===

===''Rad's Alien Sickness'' [2.36]===

===''Dark Plaza'' [2.37–38]===

==[[OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes (Season 3)|Season 3]]==

===''We Are Heroes'' [3.01]===

===''K.O., Rad, and Enid!'' [3.02]===

===''T.K.O. Rules!'' [3.03]===

===''Chip's Damage'' [3.04]===

===''K.O. vs. Fink'' [3.05]===

===''The K.O. Trap'' [3.06]===

===''Whatever Happened to... Rippy Roo?'' [3.07]===

===''Planet X'' [3.08]===

===''Deep Space Vacation'' (&lt;big&gt;100&lt;/big&gt;{{small|th}} episode) [3.09]===

===''Let's Meet [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]]'' [3.10]===
:'''K.O.''': Alright, Rad and Enid, are you ready for another action-packed day of protecting our hero plaza from evil robots?
:'''Rad''': Sorry, K.O., we stayed up all night playing videos game. I'm so tired, I don't care what happens. I'm gonna sleep through all of it! (''snores'')
:'''Enid''': Seconded.
:'''K.O.''': Bu-but… working at Gar's means we must always be alert! You never know when a legendary hero might 3D blast through our doors!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sonic''': You be careful now, kid. ''[puts down Nanini]'' Can't have anyone getting hurt on my watch.
:'''Genesis and Nanini''': ''[excitedly]'' It's really him! ''[run off, squealing]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[gasps]'' Can it be? Are you ''the'' legendary Sonic the Hedgehog with a Power Level of Ring?!
:'''Sonic''': The one and only, yep.

===''Big Reveal'' [3.11]===

===''Radical Rescue'' [3.12]===

===''Let's Get Shadowy'' [3.13]===

===''You're a Good Friend, K.O.'' [3.14]===

===''Red Action 3: Grudgement Day'' [3.15]===

===''Carl'' [3.16]===

===''Dendy's Video Channel'' [3.17]===

===''Let's Fight to the End'' [3.18-19]===
:'''Shadowy Venomous''': I THINK YOU'RE FORGETTING YOUR PLACE, BOY!

===''Thank You For Watching the Show'' [3.20]===
:'''K.O.''': ''[last lines]'' Thank you for watching the show!

==Cast==
*{{w|Stephanie Nadolny}} (Episodes 1, 4-6) and {{w|Courtenay Taylor}} (rest of the series) – K.O.
*{{w|Ashly Burch}} – Enid
*{{w|Ian Jones-Quartey}} – Radicles (Rad), Darrell
*{{w|David Herman}} – Mr. Gar, Jethro
*{{w|Kate Flannery}} – Carol
*{{w|Melissa Fahn}} – Dendy
*{{w|Jim Cummings}} – Lord Boxman
*{{w|Kari Wahlgren}} – Shannon
*{{w|Robbie Daymond}} – Raymond

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://ok-ko.wikia.com/wiki/OK_K.O.!_Wiki] &amp;ndash; OK K.O.! Wiki page
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:2010s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated action TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero TV shows]]
[[Category:Crossover animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Superhero comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Teen superhero TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]</text>
      <sha1>4xeh453cm1c6xea0t7b859qe9kltori</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965078</id>
      <parentid>3965077</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:54:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965078</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="103541" sha1="4qk4qbbil39twxzzfigwp6qgel3114y" xml:space="preserve">{{cleanup}}
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes}}''''' is an American superhero animated comedy television series created by [[w:Ian_Jones-Quartey|Ian Jones-Quartey]] and based on the webcomic ''RPG World''. It follows titular character, K.O., and his efforts to become the world's greatest hero, while working at Gar's Bodega (run by the no-nonsense Mr. Gar), a hero supply shop in a strip mall known as Lakewood Plaza Turbo. Alongside him are his best friends and co-workers Radicles, an apathetic, narcissistic alien, and Enid, a level-headed, big-sister-like ninja witch, as well as other heroes who work at and frequent a computer planet called RPG World.

== Pilot: Lakewood Plaza Turbo ==

== [[OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes (Season 1)|Season 1]] ==
===''Let's Be Heroes'' [1.01]===
''[Rad and K.O. meet for the first time and Rad is serving K.O. some lightning nachos.]''
:'''Rad''': So, you're choosing the path of the hero, huh? I'm pretty heroic myself. Level 2, if you must know. ''[eats a chip; gets shocked by electricity]''
:'''K.O.''': Well, anyway, thanks for your help, Rad. I better check out--
:'''Rad''': Oh, so you need photographic evidence of my righteous feats?
:'''K.O.''': Not now. I believe you--
:'''Rad''': If you insist. ''[shows photos on his phone]'' Here's one of me doing my famous power belly flop on a bad guy. And here's me getting the drop on ''the'' Chip Damage. Don't worry, we're cool now. ''[accidentally shows a photo of a kitten]'' And here's me--
:'''K.O.''': Aww. Who's the kitty?
:'''Rad''': Aah! ''[embarrassed]'' Uh, uh, she's nobody! It's nothing! 
''[Rad exits, racing away.]''
:'''K.O.''': What a cool guy.
----
''[An alarm goes off in the plaza, signaling the arrival of a Boxmore robot. The bodega shuts down. The doors crush one of the posters Brandon is setting up.]''
:'''Brandon''': Hey! Aw, man. It took me like an hour to paint that. This better not be another one of Gar's drills.
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Nah, those are Tuesdays. It's got to be a Boxman bot. Want to help me shoot the chaos?
''[A magic portal opens in the sky, as a Boxmore Box falls from it. The box hits the pavement, and the walls collapse to reveal a robot.]''
:'''Darrell''': I am Darrell, and I've come to destroy! ''[Starts shooting lasers, laughs maniacally.]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[waving]'' Hi Darrell, I'm K.O.! Nice to--  ''[Ducks, dodging one of Darrell's lasers.]''
''[Several people run away from Darrell's lasers.]''
:'''Darrell''': That's right! Run away, Lakewood Losers!
''[The bodega's doorbell rings as Rad and Enid exit the store.]''
:'''Rad''': (sighs) Another Boxman robot.
:'''Enid''': K.O. don't wave at him, he's evil...and a total nerd.
:'''K.O.''': Evil? I have to do something!
:'''Enid''': Whoa, hold up, you don't stand a chance against that thing.
:'''Rad''': I think he's got it.
:'''Enid''': What, you think K.O. can beat him?
:'''Rad''': Oh. Oh, no, no, no. I meant ''Darrell's'' got it. (chuckles) That kid's gonna get wrecked.
:'''K.O.''': Ha! Don't let appearances fool you. Witness the power of a true hero! ''[Jumps up into the sky.]''
:'''Darrell''': What the? ''[Spikes appear on his knuckles, as he goes in for a punch.]''
:'''K.O.''': Aah!
''[K.O. and Darrell's fists collide.]''
:'''Darrell''': (chuckles) Not bad! Where'd you get those sweet threads? The convenience store?
:'''K.O.''': Yes! In fact, I did. And I got this, too! ''[Pulls out the laser sword.]''
''[K.O. runs towards Darrell, dodging his laser beams. K.O. jumps up and cuts Darrell's arm off with a laser from the sword.]''
:'''Darrell''': Aah! No way!
:'''K.O.''': You were wrong to underestimate the power of a hero, Darrell. ''[Runs up and headbutts Darrell.]''
''[Darrell skids across the pavement.]''
:'''K.O.''': And now you're really going to get it! ''[Throws off his cape.]''
:'''Darrell''': ''[Groans, as K.O.'s cape land on him. He pulls the cape off.]'' Give it up already!
:'''K.O.''': I'll never give up, I can feel the willpower of everyone in the plaza coursing through me! ''[K.O.'s flame gauntlets activate.]'' Enough power for one final move! Get ready to feel 10,000 strikes of sweet justice, Darrell!
''[Darrell begins to tremble in fear.]''
:'''K.O.''': Ultra-flaming-evil-pulverizing-punch! Ha!
''[The scene intercuts with K.O. landing punches on Darrell and K.O. embedded in a wall.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Kid. Hey, kid. Snap out of it. Come on, kid. ''[Begins lightly smacking K.O. across the face.]'' Kid, come on. Kid?
:'''K.O.''': ''[Shakes his head, mumbling as he wakes up.]'' What-- What happened?
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Geez, where do I start with this? Well, okay. See that robot over there with the cannon and the big fist? ''[Points to Darrell.]'' Well, first, you tried to block his punch. But he just knocked your flame gauntlets in your face, which knocked you out. As you fell back, you tripped over your beach towel, and fell butt-first into your lightning nachos which shocked you backwards into this here wall. Actually pretty funny.
:'''K.O.''': ''[Blushing]'' Th-That's what really happened?
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': I recorded the whole thing if you want to check it out.
''[The phone begins to play sounds of K.O. screaming and grunting, followed by splattering sounds. K.O. screams some more, and whirling sounds play.]''
:'''K.O.''': I can't believe it... ''[He sinks to the ground.]'' That fight felt so intense, but it wasn't real, just like my big dream. I thought I'd already become a hero, but all I did was wear stuff and get my butt kicked. Who am I kidding I'm not even close to being there yet...
:'''Enid''': ''[Shaking Rad, trying to wake him up.]'' Get off the ground, you stupid meatloaf.
''[A whistle is heard in the distance, and it is revealed to be Gar that was whistling.]''
:'''Enid''': Ha!
:'''Darrell''': What the?
:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[He drops down on Darrell from the sky, causing an explosion, decapitating Darrell.]'' Hmm. ''[He kicks Darrell's head toward Boxman's factory.]''
:'''Darrell''': Aah!
''[The crosswalk sign turns green, and gives off a ding.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': You two, get this mess cleaned up.
:'''Rad and Enid''': Yes, sir!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Mondays, am I right? ''[Walks off.]''
:'''Rad''': Man, Mr. Gar's pretty cool, but, like, how'd he even get up there?
:'''Enid''': He's level eleven, dude, now come on.

===''Let's Be Friends'' [1.02]===
:'''K.O.''': (Thinking) ''Man, Rad and Enid are on another level. I wanna work with them so bad, but I can't even do a cool power move. I can't give up. There must be some way I could convince them to give me another chance. Maybe if I brought them a giant cake, or if I let them hold my rarest Pow cards. Maybe if I wore a baseball cap backwards.'' ''[He pictures these scenarios in the clouds]''
''[Shannon appears before him with a poor disguise.]''
:'''Shannon''': Excuse me. I couldn't help but notice your unemployment. You know these days if you wanna work at a place like Gar's, you gotta do something really special.
:'''K.O.''': (Disappointed) A résumé.
:'''Shannon''': No, no, no, no. I'm talking something like... infiltrating Lord Boxman's lair and maybe, like, defeating him all by yourself.
:'''K.O.''': That's a good idea, so good that Rad and Enid will have to hire me and be my friends. ''[runs towards Boxmore]'' Thanks for the help, ominous stranger! You're the best!
:'''Shannon''': Ch'yeah, obviously. (laughs evilly)

===''You're Everybody's Sidekick'' [1.03]===
''[It's K.O.'s first day working at Gar's Bodega and he excitedly reports to Enid.]''
:'''K.O.''': Helper K.O., reporting for duty!
:'''Enid''': (chuckles) At ease, soldier. Helper K.O.! Your first mission... ''[K.O.'s eyes widen]'' here at Gar's is to...clean up the store. ''[Enid points to the closet full of cleaning equipment, with a sign on top that says &quot;8 WAYS OF CLEANSING&quot;]''
:'''K.O.''': Wow! The ancient tools of the cleaning the floor! ''[K.O. stares in awe]''  
:'''Enid''': Now go! And save the bodega from the forces of dirt or something. ''[K.O. dashes off and suits up in an armor of cleaning supplies.]''
:'''K.O.''': Dirt, today you breathe your last filthy breath! I swear on the honor of the bodega, I will vanquish you! 
''[K.O. speeds through sweeping and cleaning through the aisle. Enid watches as Ginger appears at her desk.]'' 
:'''Ginger''': Dearie, can I pay for this in thousands of pennies? 
''[Not wanting to answer the customer, Enid disappears and a log takes her place.]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs mischievously) Enid, Enid, Enid! All done! Anything else I can help you with? 
:'''Enid''': Hmm. Ah! Sort through this penny dish... ''[pushes the penny dish to K.O.]'' and take out everything that isn't a penny. ''[K.O. looks inside the dish and sees a pen, a baseball, a throwing star, a teapot, and and onion with a face. He gasps and starts picking out things.]'' Boy, you sure love helping people, don't ya buddy? 
:'''K.O.''': Well, sure! It's my job. And isn't that how everyone feels? 
:'''Enid''': ''[with a quizzical expression]'' Help people...? Nope, not for me. Too much work, too little payoff. I'm good with just helping myself. 
''[K.O. looks down for a moment before standing up and inhales deeply.]'' 
:'''K.O.''': Enid, I am going to help you!!
:'''Enid''': ''[jumped by K.O.]'' Ah! Excuse me?  
:'''K.O.''': ''[As he stands proudly]'' As an official helper of Gar's Bodega, I am going to help you see how great it is to help people! 
''[There's a small pause as Enid stares at K.O.]''
:'''Enid''': You'll never melt my icy heart. 
:'''K.O.''': We'll just see about that! ''[K.O. runs off to help people.]'' Gotta be helpful! Gotta be helpful! (pants)

===''We Messed Up'' [1.04]===
''[K.O., Rad, and Enid have just snuck into Mr. Gar's office and accidentally destroyed a photo he had of Carol. The trio shudder after imagining what will happen if Mr. Gar finds out.]'' 
:'''K.O.''': On second thought, why don't you two distract Mr. Gar while I try to get my mom to recreate this photo?
:'''Rad and Enid''': Hmm!
''[Rad gives Enid a boost to dunk K.O. into a vent.]''
:'''Enid''': Dah!
''[Rad and Enid exits Mr. Gar's office quickly.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': Radicles, Enid, any particular reason you're loitering so close to my office?
:'''Enid''': We...
:'''Rad''': Uh...
:'''Enid''': ...were, uh...
:'''Rad''': Practicing a new dance!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Oh, really? Let me see it.
''[K.O. is crawling inside the vents.]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Thinking] Mr. Gar has a photo of my mom. I have so many questions, like what, when, why, and huh? But I don't have time for that. I've got to get this photo remade.''
''[Transitions to the Fitness Dojo.]''
:'''Carol''': And one and two and punch!
''[K.O. comes out from the vent and the cover hits Ginger.]''
:'''K.O.''': Mom! Mom, I need you to be young and hot again!
:'''Carol''': (chuckles nervously) Let's go ahead and take five, girls. ''[Gertie and Gladys leaves the Dojo.]''
----
''[Enid and Rad are doing a dance in front of Mr. Gar to keep him distracted.]''
:'''Enid and Rad''': Ta-da! (Both panting, chuckling nervously)
''[They sweat in anticipation of Mr. Gar's response.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': (groans) I give it a 7.5.
:'''Rad''': 7.5?!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Now, if you'll excuse me.
''[Enid pushes Rad off to the side.]''
:'''Rad''': Aah!
:'''Enid''': Mr. Gar, wait! Hey, I, uh, saw someone in the magazine aisle for like 20 minutes.
:'''Mr. Gar''': A cheapskate?!
''[Transitions to the Fitness Dojo with Carol finding her outfit.]''
:'''Carol''': Mm. Ha! Here it is. But I don't think it's gonna fit, K.O. Bleh!
:'''K.O.''': But we got to get that pic!
:'''Carol''': Hmm. Mama's got an idea.
''[Transitions to Gar's Hero Supply &amp; Bodega with Mr. Gar grabbing Crinkly Wrinkly.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': If you want to read monster truck books for free, then go to the library!
''[He throws Crinkly Wrinkly through a space in the ceiling and is shot from the Cheapskate Cannon on the roof.]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Eee! (screams)
''[The scene displays a shot of jail, but instead, he lands in the library.]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Books!
:'''Unknown person''': Shh!
''[Transitions back to Gar's Hero Supply &amp; Bodega.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': I will not have no tightwads in no store of mine. No, sir. Where was I? Oh, yes. Back to my perfect office.
:'''Rad''': Mr. Gar! Mr. Gar! I... forgot.. how to... mop? ''[grabs a mop]'' Please, oh, please, teach me how. ''[He scrapes the floor with the mop.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': Mm.

===''Jethro's All Yours'' [1.05]===
:'''K.O.''': My first solo mission-- another step on my heroic journey. I’ll earn Rad and Enid’s trust by destroying Boxman’s powerful robot and make everyone proud-- especially Mommy. All right, Jethro. You asked for it, and now you’re gonna get it.
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Not for long. 
''[K.O. returns to catch Jethro, kicks him high in the air and jumps. K.O. repeatedly fights Jethro until he dismantles it and lands on the ground.]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) And so my journey continues. Huh? ''[An army of Jethros comes towards him]'' Brought your friends this time, eh?
:'''Jethros''': I am Jethro. I am Jethro. I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Wait, so you’re all Jethro? That doesn’t make sense! ''[Enrages then starting running to the army of Jethros and destroys them one-by-one]'' Whew! I didn’t realize becoming a hero meant sweating so much. Oh, well. Jethro, and Jethro, and Jethro and the other two Jethros are now gone. Forever. ''[A bigger version of Jethro approaches]''
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro. 
''[K.O. looks unamused, then Jethro rolls over and crushes a car.]''
:'''Brandon''': My mom’s car! Aah! It’s totaled, man. She’s gonna kill me.
:'''K.O.''': I don’t get it. He just keeps coming. ''[A thought bubble with Rad pops up.]''
:'''Rad''': Jethro’s perfect for you. He’s simple, and you’re simple. Simple, simple, simple.
:'''K.O.''': ''[Crumbles up the thought bubble]'' I’ll show you simple, you meanie. ''[Throws the crumble at Jethro]''
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': (sighs) Not for long. ''[K.O. is about to fight Jethro. Suddenly envisions himself as Jethro. K.O. feels that he can’t fight Jethro and stops his position]'' I just can’t do it.
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Do you know what my friend Rad says about us? That we’re simple.
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Is that how Lord Boxman treats you? Like you’re some dumb kid? Like you’re not worth anything? Do people underestimate you, too?
:'''Jethro''': I am Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Well, I am K.O.. And maybe Rad was right. You and I are a lot alike. So I don’t think I can’t clobber you. ''[Once Jethro meets K.O.’s foot, he suddenly falls apart.]'' Poop.
----
''[Outside of the plaza, birds are flying away. Joff, A Real Magic Skeleton, Nick Army, Punching Judy, and Crinkly Wrinkly turn around in shock and run away from Mega-Jethro when he runs over multiple cars.]''
:'''Joff, A Real Magic Skeleton, Nick Army, Punching Judy, and Crinkly Wrinkly''': Oh!
:'''Brandon''': My dad’s car! ''[Runs off to it]''
''[Enid, K.O., and Rad run out of the store to see Mega-Jethro approaching the store.]''
:'''Mega Jethro''': I am Mega-Jethro.
:'''Enid''': Bye. ''[goes back in the store, unamused]''
:'''K.O.''': See, I told you. Jethro’s a way-more complicated enemy than you thought.
:'''Rad''': Pfft, child’s play. It’s Jethro. He’s still simple, and you’re still simple. ''[K.O. is angry at him]'' I’m so sure of it, I’ll tag along with you 'cause the only thing I love more than being proved right is proving other people wrong.
:'''Mega Jethro''': I am Mega-Jethro.
''[K.O. and Rad runs towards to Mega-Jethro.]''
:'''K.O.''': Jethro, don’t do this! You’ve got to stop!
:'''Mega Jethro''': I am Mega-Jethro.
:'''K.O.''': Oh, sorry. Mega-Jeth-- Mega-Jethro, don’t do this! You’ve got to stop!
----
''[K.O. and Rad enter the pupil opening in Mega-Jethro and it’s revealed that the inside is nothing more than a light source and a switch.]''
:'''Rad''': (laughs) Looks just like your head, K.O..
:'''K.O.''': You-- You shouldn’t underestimate us! I mean him. There’s probably a super-tough puzzle we need to solve to get…
''[Rad pulls the switch. Rad and K.O. bounce all over the place as a result.]''
:'''Rad and K.O.''': Oh! Ahh! Ow! Aah!
''[Mega-Jethro continues to approach the store, but at the moment he touches a piece of the store, a beeping noise is heard and he moves backwards now. Inside the store, Enid still continues to listen to her music and rolls her eyes at what’s going on out there.]''
:'''Brandon''': ''[examining his dad’s smashed car]'' Well, this doesn’t seem too bad. Yeah, it’s gonna be okay. I can totally fix this.
''[Mega-Jethro smashes the car again. A tear drops from Brandon's eye.]''
:'''Rad''': Sweet, we’re moving away from the plaza now. Let’s bounce, squirt. Uh, squirt? Squirt!
:'''K.O.''': Oh. Coming!
''[Rad and K.O. jump out of Mega-Jethro. The next scene shows Lord Boxman drinking a cup of tea and the sound waves coming off from Mega-Jethro result in him losing grip of his teacup, spilling on his lab coat.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Gah! Blast! What is happening out there? ''[Turns around and sees Mega-Jethro approaching close to his factory]'' Poop. ''[Mega-Jethro makes an impact with the factory, setting off an explosion.]''
:'''Rad''': Too easy.

===''You're Level 100'' [1.06]===
''[K.O. has become popular, because of his Pow Card, which says he is level 100. The scene cuts to the Action News 52 opening scene.]''
:'''Announcer''': This is Action News 52, bringing you your daily dose of action news!
''[The Action News 52 truck appears, falls off a cliff and lands on a car.]''
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': ''[Kicks a door out]'' Action! Hup! This is Dynamite Watkins, comin’ at you live in the heart of the neutral zone. We’re here in front of Gar’s bodega, where a crowd has gathered to see the newcomer hero with a power level of 100. You heard me, level 100! And here is the famed hero himself, K.O.! How does it feel being the most powerful being in the plaza-- possibly the world!
:'''K.O.''': Well, I always knew I would be a great hero some day, but I didn’t think it would happen after only a week! Guess I’m just that good!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': And how do your friends and family feel about this newfound power of yours?
:'''Enid''': ''[Enid and Rad tries to get in the way]'' Make way, coming though! Move it, jerk! Not to brag, but me and K.O. go way back to the beginning of the week. N.B.D.
:'''Rad''': And I sort of act as K.O.’s best friend/life coach/older brother figure. We’re really close.
:'''Potato''': K.O.! Can i have your autograph?!
:'''K.O.''': Ha, sure kid. ''[Signs Potato’s book]'' [Thinking] Wow, being level 100 is so cool. ''[Signs another book]'' Everyone loves me and I feel so important! ''[Signs Brandon’s arm]'' I can’t wait to put my amazing skills to the test and some dastardly foe! ''[Signs another book]'' And who should I make this out to?
:'''Lord Boxman''': Lord Boxman.
:'''K.O.''': ''[Continues to sign]'' Lord… Boxm-- Lord Boxman!
''[Lord Boxman is shown behind his floating desk.]'' 
:'''Lord Boxman''': So, you’re the little twerp claiming to be level 100. Ha! Impossible!
:'''K.O.''': Oh, yeah? If I weren’t a level 100, how else would i have kicked your butt all week?
:'''Lord Boxman''': Well, that was… on purpose! I lost to you on purpose, yes, as a… as a prank on you! So… ha! Anyway, ''[pulls out a remote]'' today I have something specially prepared that only a true level 100 hero could handle. Much stronger than anything you’ve yet faced. ''[A Boxmore box falls from the sky, revealing a giant Darrell.]'' Say hello to my latest creation. I call him, Big Darrell. I’ve upped him to be level negative 100! Ba-ha-ha!
:'''Crowd''': Oh! This is bad!
:'''Enid''': K.O., this thing is really powerful. Yeah bud, maybe we should call Mr.-- mph!
:'''K.O.''': ''[Shoves his Pow Card to Rad’s mouth]'' Heh. Trust me, guys, this will be easy for a level 100 like me. Just try not to get in the way. you really think this bucket of bolts will be able to stop me? Heh. i stomped you once and I’ll stomp you again, Lord Buttman!
:'''Crowd''': K.O.! K.O.! K.O.! K.O.! 
''[Enid and Rad look at each other worriedly.]''

===''SIbling Rivalry'' [1.07]===
''[Shannon and Darrell come flying through the ceiling of Boxmore after being defeated by K.O., Read, and Enid and land before Boxman, sitting on his throne.]''
:'''Shannon and Darrell''': We're sorry, Father! We tried!
:'''Lord Boxman''': Ah, yes. Tried. Tried and failed-- for the last time!
:'''Darrell''': Oh, I bet we could fail way more times.
:'''Shannon''': Quiet!
''[Shannon punches Darrell.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': You do not need to try. You need to do! (sighs) I knew you two would fail me again today. So I created a new robot to succeed where you never could! Say hello to Raymond!
''[Boxman presses a button and a door opens, where a robot comes out.]''
:'''Raymond''': (laughs) Here comes... the player of the year!
''[Raymond makes a show off presentation with sports balls.]''
:'''Shannon''': Already hate him.
:'''Raymond''': Hello, dearest brother and sister. Care for a friendly game of ball?
:'''Shannon''': No, thanks.
:'''Darrell''': Oh, I'm open!
''[Raymond hits Darrell with a ball, that bounces between him and Shannon, knocking both out.]''
:'''Raymond''': Of course, there is no game to be played, when there is just one player.
:'''Lord Boxman''': Brilliant introduction, Raymond! So very rude!
:'''Raymond''': Thank you, Coach Boxman. Of course it was brilliant! You are, after all, the master engineer behind this vessel of pure athleticism.
''[Raymond show Lord Boxman a rose and he jumps around excitedly.]''
:'''Shannon''':Totally just parlor tricks of a slimy amateur clown.
:'''Raymond''': Father, I will make you proud by stealing a letter from the Gar's Bodega sign. Then no one will know they're a store. Their profits will plummet, and with that, they forfeit the business game.
:'''Lord Boxman''': I love it!
''[Shannon and Darrell gasp in surprise.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Raymond, you're my favorite. I've always loved you. And I wish you two could be more like him.
''[Shannon and Darrell roll out of scene in pain.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Let us go, Raymond, and equip you with strong weapons.
:'''Raymond''': (laughs) Yes! Hole in one.
''[Shannon and Darrell are shown in graves and pop out of them.]''
:'''Shannon''': This is all your fault, glass brain! Now Father hates me.
:'''Darrell''': Oh, yeah, right! He hates me more. But he loves Raymond so much more than both of us.
:'''Shannon''': Raymond is gonna fail anyways. But he won't fail as spectacularly as you!
:'''Darrell''': Say that again, you orange mushroom head!
''[Shannon and Darrell slap each other.]''

===''I Am Dendy'' [1.08]===
''[K.O. is helping Dendy, a shy kappa girl from his class, find the parts needed to repair her hack-pack. They arrive at an arcade.]''
:'''K.O.''': Here we are!
:'''Dendy''': A token machine?
:'''K.O.''': We’re just .25 technos away from your cotton pooter disc. Lemme just grab a coin! ''[While opening his pocket, some moths fly out.]'' No! My moth collection! No, come back! ''[Dendy opens the back of the token machine.]'' Uhh! ''[Catches the moth]'' Gotcha, you little scamp! Guess we’ll need another way-- ''[Dendy moves a wire.]'' Dendy? Dendy?! ''[Tokens start spewing out of the machine.]'' Whoa, guess we didn’t need coins after all.
:'''Dendy''': These tokens should meet our needs.
:'''K.O.''': You’re always a step ahead of people, huh?
:'''Dendy''': I do walk quickly, yes.
:'''K.O.''': No, I mean, like, you kinda just do things in your own way. It’s kinda weird! But it’s kinda really cool, too?
:'''Dendy''': ''[Smiles]'' Now, the final item I need is a glorb. ''[Shows hologram]'' The simplest course of action would be to return to the roboto barber, tear open his interior circuits and extract it by force.
:'''K.O.''': Whoa, wait! You can’t hurt Mr. Logic!
:'''Dendy''': Oh, but how do we acquire a glorb without a robot?
:'''K.O.''': Well, we fight a ton of bad robots around here, and after, we toss ‘em in an alley out back!
:'''Dendy''': Hmm. Very well. To the alloy!
:'''K.O.''': Alley.
:'''Dendy''': To the alley!
Ok crying

===''Do You Have Any More in the Back?'' [1.09]===
''[Rad is leading K.O. and Enid through the maze-like back room of the store and have gotten lost.]''
:'''K.O.''': I can’t even tell what direction we started from!
:'''Rad''': You don’t gotta worry about that with me guiding ya! ''[Passes through vines]'' Watch your head.
:'''K.O.''': Oh. (chuckles)
:'''Enid''': Uh, vines? Rad, are you sure this is the right-- Hey! Check out these Gloops!
''[Gloops, small blob-like creatures, are slithering on the ground.]''
:'''K.O.''': Weird!
:'''Enid''': Hey, Rad, is it okay to touch these things?!
:'''Rad''': Sure.
''[Enid pokes a Gloop with a stick and the stick instantly disintegrates.] ''
:'''Enid''': Ooh! (screams) What the heck, dude?! I almost lost my favorite hand!
:'''Rad''': Oh! I thought you meant, uh, emotionally touch-- like tell it a sad story or something. Yeah, you shouldn’t physically touch these things.
:'''K.O.''': Wow! Rad really knows his stuff!

===''My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad!'' [1.10]===
''[K.O. is looking at the food at Burrito Beardo’s and is drooling.]''
:'''Beardo''': All right, all right, all right. ''[Starts handing the food to the customers]'' We got one order of the Joe and Macaroni, one Sypros Platter, and one Gnocchi Gnocchi Panic. 
''[The customers receive their food and head off.]''
:'''K.O.''': Man, it all looks so delicious.
''[Rad eats his Dragon Dragon Burrito.]''
:'''Rad''': I recommend the Dragon Dragon Burrito. ''[Burps out dragons]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) I really want to try that, but the burgs and potato wedges also look really good. Hmm.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (clears throat)
''[K.O. turns around to see the Lizard Gang waiting in line. Chameleon Jr. looks at his watch and sighs. The titlecard appears.]''
:'''K.O.''': So, wedges, I think. Oh, maybe--
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (clears throat loudly) Hmph! Take your time. It’s cool. It’s not like anybody is waiting.
:'''K.O.''': Ah, thank goodness. I was worried I was taking too long.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': Great. We got a real genius here.
''[The Lizard Gang laughs]''
:'''K.O.''': Aww! Thanks for the compliment.
''[The Lizard Gang laughs again]''
:'''Rad''': Dude, K.O., you’re not getting complimented. You’re getting zinged.
:'''K.O.''': (gasps) What? No! What should I do?
:'''Rad''': Zing him back. A true hero never backs down. They fight fire… ''[Eats the burrito and breathes fires]'' with fire.
:'''K.O.''': Even firefighters?
:'''Rad''': Yes. They use blowtorches.
''[K.O. faces the Lizard Gang and one of them taps Chameleon Jr. to look at him.]''
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (chuckles) What are you looking at, neeeeeeeeeeeeerd? ''[The NERD text shoots out from his mouth while K.O. dodges it.]'' (laughs)
:'''K.O.''': Well, it takes one to know one! ''[K.O. shoots out text from his mouth hitting Chameleon Jr.]''
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': Oh yeah? ''[Shouts out text once more]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Punches the YEAH text]'' Yeeeeeaaah! ''[The Yeah text pushes Chameleon’s Jr.’s gang.]'' (sighs)
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (growls) Oh, it’s on, now. I challenge you to a clash of fists!
:'''K.O.''': Bring on the fire, jerko. I’ll torch you like a creme brulee.
:'''Beardo''': (laughs)
:'''Rad''': Nice.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''' (growls) Have a taste of my sticky tongue. ''[K.O. dodges his sticky tongue,and it gets stuck on Beardo’s truck.]'' Ohhhhhhh. Oof! ''[His tongue unsticks and slaps him in the face, turning him pink.]''
:'''Rad, Beardo, and K.O.''': (laughs)
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': (growls) Well, m-m-my dad can beat up your dad!
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can… My dad can… I don’t have a dad.
''[Beardo laughs and stops while Rad coughs on his burrito.]''
:'''K.O.''': But I have a mom that can beat up anybody!
:'''Beardo''': Whew.
:'''Chameleon Jr.''': Then it’s on. 3:00 sharp, roof of the plaza.
:'''K.O.''': We’ll be there. My mom is gonna love this.
''[The scene cuts to Carol.]''
:'''Carol''': I hate this, K.O.. I am very disappointed in you. You’re grounded.

===''You Get Me'' [1.11]===
''[Enid has been turned to stone and K.O. has told Rad and Mr. Gar about it. Unfortunately, they don't see anything wrong with her.]''
:'''K.O.''': [thinking] They didn't realize Enid's been turned to stone! Why? (gasps) Could it be that I'm the only one that gets her after all? Alright, this is my change to prove that I can be an Enid-getter, and a go-getter! Time to get help, and turn her back to normal.
''[Scene cuts to Dendy running some tests on Enid.]''
:'''K.O.''': Thanks again for coming, Dendy. I just knew that I could count on you to have some super-smart way to get to the bottom of this!
:'''Dendy''': It is my pleasure, K.O. I will metaphorically leave no stone unturned.
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) And literally, too, right?
:'''Dendy''': What? Ooo, oooh, the results are printing. Hmm... Mmm-hmm... Mmm-hm. Well, K.O, it would appear as if your friend has been turned into steatite.
:'''K.O.''': Huh?
:'''Dendy''': It is also known as soapstone. It is commonly used by novice sculptors to practice carving techniques because of its relative softness.
:'''K.O.''': I know that! I mean, I didn't know what kind of a rock, and that is super interesting, but what I was rally hoping for was to turn her back from rock to person.
:'''Dendy''': Ohhhh... I don't really do... that.
:'''K.O.''': Noooo! I can't help her. And no one else thinks they need to help her. How is she ever going to come back?
:'''Dendy''': I don't know anything about Enid's predicament. Or giving emotional counsel. I am sorry K.O. See you at school tomorrow!

===''You Are Rad'' [1.12]===
''[Rad has accused K.O. of trying to impersonate him, so Rad gives him a series of challenges to prove to everyone that K.O. isn't the real Rad. It's now down to the final challenge, a rap battle.]''
:'''K.O.''': Rap battle? Are we supposed to punch each other with rhymes?
:'''Rad''': More or less. Gimme a beat, Enid!
:'''Enid''': No, thanks.
:'''Rad''': Aw, man, come on.
:'''Enid''': (sighs) Fine. ''[Puts on her DJ outfit and flips the counter to her DJ set. Plays music.]''
:'''Rad''': Yeah, I can work with that. All right, imposter, get ready, ‘cause this ends here. 
''[Rapping]'' 
:♪Ohh, I’m the extraterrestrial, emphasis on extra♪
:♪My skin is blue because I come from Planet X, bruh♪
:♪If you step on this, you gonna get creamed♪
:♪If you outta line, you gonna get laser beamed♪
:♪Arms ripped, afro poofy♪ 
:♪Ears tipped, you goofy♪ 
:♪Liftin’ and pumpin’ and crushin’ the weights♪
:♪Don’t be surprised when I thrash you♪ 
:♪Movin’ and settin’ and stackin’ the crates♪
''[Uses his powers to move the crates]'' 
:♪And you ain’t nothin’ but trash, do♪ 
''[Throws K.O. into the crate “trash”]'' 
:♪You lookin’ foolish♪ 
:♪You ain’t the real me♪
:♪I am the true Rad♪ 
:♪I know you feel me♪ 
:♪He is Radicles♪ 
:♪Ain’t nobody ever wanna mess with me♪ 
:♪I said he is Radicles♪ 
:♪I ain’t got time for no identity thief♪ 
''[Drops mic]''
:'''Enid''': Hey! Careful with my gear!
:'''Rad''': ''[Picks up mic]'' Sorry, Enid.
:'''Enid''': That’s right you are.
:'''K.O.''': Uh, Enid, do you know “Wash Your Hands”?
:'''Enid''': I’ll see what I can do, K.O.. Knock em dead! ''[Replaces a disk with a new one. Plays a new song.]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, cool. All right, here goes nothin’. 
''[Rapping]'' 
:♪Well, I’m Radicles and I’m here to say♪ 
:♪I learned a lot about myself today♪ 
''[Takes out notepad]'' 
:♪I’m a yoga guy with a yoga mat♪
:♪Don’t believe it, ask the kids I babysat♪
:♪Sharks and bees ain’t where it’s at♪ 
:♪I rather snuggle up with a kitty cat♪ 
:♪I like to burp and I like to toot♪ 
:♪But deep inside, I’m really cute♪ 
:♪Wash your hands, wash your hands♪ 
:♪It’s a good idea to wash your hands♪
:'''Drupe''': (snickers)
:'''K.O.''': ♪Lather ‘em up with a little bit of soap♪ 
:♪Wash your hands, don’t be a dope♪ 
:'''Rad''': ''[Grabs mic from K.O.]'' Listen, imposter. I don’t babysit or do yoga, and I definitely don’t like snuggling kittens.
:'''K.O.''': I don’t understand. That all seems like cool stuff to me.
:'''Rad''': But Rad would never find that stuff cool. And even if he did, Rad wouldn’t be ready to share those things about himself. If you really were Rad, you’d know that.
:'''K.O.''': Oh. Gah! You got me! All that stuff I rapped about was lies. I was, uh, trying to embarrass you. Yeah. Isn’t that what rapping battles are all about?
:'''Rad''': I guess. Uh, yeah! Yeah, you’re right!
:'''K.O.''': Well, I guess my little plan didn’t work. You’re the real Rad-- ''[Hands name tag to Rad and puts it on]'' tough, cool, and totally one-dimensional.
:'''Enid''': ''[Record scratches]'' All right, I’m bored. Everybody out. ''[Her DJ set turns back to a counter; she changes her outfit and listens to her music.]''

===''Just Be a Pebble'' [1.13]===
''[At Gar's Hero Supply &amp; Bodega, K.O. is struggling to put a box on the shelf. Rad passes by with a forklift and stops.]''
:'''K.O.''': (groans, sighs) Rad, I'm too small!
:'''Rad''': Why not try some of this candy? ''[Throws the candy to K.O.]'' Just got 'em in. Check out the wrapper. ''[K.O. catches the candy]'' It's a little guy turning into a big guy. So they'll probably make you big.
:'''K.O.''': Big?
:'''Rad''': Not that I ever need that junk, though. (chuckles) 'Cause I'm so huge already.
:'''K.O.''': I trust you, big friend! ''[Eats the candy]''
''[Nothing happens.]''
:'''Rad''': Well, that was a du--.
''[K.O. grows into the same height as Rad.]''
:'''K.O.''':  Whoo! ''[Picks up the box and places it on the shelf.]'' Wow, just like that.
:'''Rad''': I can't believe that actually worked. ''[Leaves]''
:'''K.O.''': This is perfect. So maybe I'm not a Gargantuan, but I'm definitely more than Megahugeman. And that's good enough for me. ''[Looks at the packages of the candy.]''
:'''Rad''': ''[Reads a magazine and gets startled of K.O.'s growing limbs]'' Aah!
:'''Enid''': ''[On her phone and also gets startled of K.O.'s growing limbs]'' Aah! Rad, what the heck is going...? K.O.? ''[K.O. grows to become a giant and eventually damages the roof of the store.]'' Whoa. I am not cleaning this up.
:'''K.O.'''; ''[Waves at Enid]'' Hi, Enid, I'm big now! ''[A pteradactyl slams onto his hand.]'' Whoops! (blows) ''[Pteradactyl squawks]'' Sorry!
:'''Rad''': Looking good, buddy!
:'''Enid''': He may look good, but we won't when Mr. Gar sees his store is destroyed.
:'''Rad''': Oh, good point. Never mind, K.O. You look like crud!
:'''Enid''': ''[Covers Rad's mouth with her hand]'' K.O., why are you so big?
:'''K.O.''': (chuckles) I ate some of this weird candy. ''[Drops a bunch of candy.]'' Green ones make you big.
:'''Enid''': Uh, is there one that can make you small again?
:'''Rad''': Yeah. I don't know about that. None of these look super-promising.
:'''K.O.''': Don't worry, guys. I won't be needing to get small again. That's the old K.O. Now I'm finally what I've wanted to be ever since I was little-- just this morning-- ''[Stretches his arms and jumps up and damage the roof once more.]'' Huge!

===''Presenting Joe Cuppa'' [1.14]===
''[K.O. is helping Joe Cuppa, a washed up comedian, regain his confidence by working alongside him in the bodega. But, Joe is discouraged.]''
:'''K.O.''': Yeah, maybe working here isn’t the right thing to help you right now.
:'''Joe Cuppa''': ''[His work vest disappears with flames]'' Oh. ''[Alarm goes off]'' Huh? What’s going on?!
:'''K.O.''': ''[carries Joe Cuppa]'' You’re gonna love this! Nothing cheers me up more than beating up bad guys! ''[Throws him out the window.]''
''[Rad, K.O., and Enid exit and prepare to battle.]''
:'''Enid''': Psst, Joe. Prepare to intimidate.
''[Joe is shown wearing only underwear lying on the ground.]'' 
:'''Joe Cuppa''': Like this? (chuckles)
:'''Enid''': Intimidate not intimate!
''[A Boxmore box drops on the ground, marked &quot;Shannon 2.0&quot;. It opens up to reveal Shannon. She gets off her throne.]''
:'''Shannon''': Welcome, plazoids! It’s me-- Shannon!
:'''Enid''': Yeah, we know it’s you, Shannon.
:'''Rad''': You can’t say welcome! You came here! Plus , you’re not welcome, like, at all. Go away.
:'''Shannon''': ''[chuckles]'' I’m welcoming you… ''[releases her weapons]'' TO YOUR DEMISE!
:'''Joe Cuppa''': Whoa! Would you look at the time.
:'''Shannon''': ''[Holds her blade in front of Joe Cuppa]'' Hold up! Is this a new addition to your little ensemble? ''[Stretches her head out]'' Looks a little… ''pathetique.'' ''[Joe Cuppa whimpers]'' He fits right in! ''[transforms into a hammer and smashes the ground.]''
:'''Enid, K.O., and Rad''': Whoa! ''[Joe Cuppa fell to the ground with coffee spilled.]'' Joe?!
:'''Shannon''': Hold that pose! ''[takes pictures]'' I gotta show H.Q. how hard I am crushing you right now.
:'''Joe Cuppa''': ''[sighs]'' Listen, guys, I’m just your average Joe. I ain’t got powers like you. I’m no hero, that’s for sure.
:'''Rad''': No powers?! Pfff! ''[looks into Joe Cuppa’s head.]'' There’s gotta be something in th-- ''[finds a mouth and screams]'' Oh, ''that’s'' where your mouth is! That’s super disgusting!

===''We've Got Pests'' [1.15]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''Legends of Mr. Gar'' [1.16]===
''[Darrell is shown spray painting the words &quot;smells bad&quot; under the Lakewood Plaza Turbo sign, so it reads &quot;Lakewood Plaza Turbo smells bad&quot;.]''
:'''Darrell''': (laughs maniacally) 
:'''Enid''': You're going down, Darrell!
''[Darrell is thrown off of his ladder and falls to the ground. K.O., Rad, Enid, and Mr. Gar surround him.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': You've messed with the plaza for the last time, bucket of bolts! And you can send that message to Lord Boxman!
:'''Enid''': First class! 
:'''Rad''': Signed, sealed, and delivered! 
:'''K.O.''': Yeah! In an envelope! 
''[K.O. puts an envelope in a mailbox and then it shoots it out in Darrell's face.]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': Thanks for the backup on that trash talk, team.
----
''[After Mr. Gar has defeated Darrell, K.O., Rad, and Enid are laying on their backs in amazement at the battle.]''
:'''K.O.''': Our boss is the dang coolest.
:'''Rad''': Uh huh.
:'''Enid''': Totally. 
:'''Mr. Gar''': Don't just lay there impressed! Drop and give me twenty! 
''[The trio is thrown on their heads by Mr. Gar's voice and fall back.]''
:'''K.O.''': Uh, twenty whats, sir?
:'''Mr. Gar''': Twenty...everything! 
''[K.O., Rad, and Enid start doing various exercises]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': 1, 2. 1, 2. 1, 2...
''[Mr. Gar stares on, impressed]''
----
''[In Enid's flashback of her first day of work, Mr. Gar has just heard a customer's complaint and is showing Enid how to deal with him.]''
:'''Enid''': M-Mr. Gar, I--
:'''Mr. Gar''': Enid, I'm gonna teach you a very important lesson. 
:'''Skateboard Nerd''': (chuckles) Yeah! That the customer is always-- Huh?
''[Mr. Gar suddenly grabs the Skateboard Nerd and holds him up to his face]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': '''''We're all out of wheel polish!! Sorry we can't help you!! Thank you for shopping at Gar's!!'''''
''[Enid is shown with her mouth open in shock]''
----
''[Crinkly Wrinkly just finished telling K.O., Rad, and Enid a far-fetched tale about Mr. Gar]''
:'''Enid''': Well, that was a bunch of drivel.
:'''Rad''': Obviously a fabrication.
:'''K.O.''': Ha! Amazing! 
:'''Enid''': K.O., you probably shouldn't listen to Crinkly Wrinkly. 
:'''K.O.''': Why's that?
:'''Enid''': (points off-screen) Well...
''[Crinkly Wrinkly is shown looking at himself in a mirror, mistaking his reflection for another person]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Who's that?! You got a cane just like mine! (chuckles)

===''Know Your Mom'' [1.17]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''We're Captured'' [1.18]===
''[Lord Boxman has K.O., Rad, and Enid suspended above a lava pit in his factory. He is also trying to have dinner with Professor Venomous and is at odds at what to do with the trio.]''
:'''K.O.''': So, you're gonna let us go?
''[Him and his friends smile hopefully]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': No. I'm just gonna have to wait until after dinner, like a mint-- a punish-mint.
''[Shannon is heard singing a song to entertain Professor Venomous and Fink.]''
:'''Shannon''': ♪When you're climbing up a ladder♪
:♪And you feel a little splatter, dia--♪
:'''Lord Boxman''': Nooooo!! ''[runs off to stop her]''
----
''[Lord Boxman, Professor Venomous, and Fink are sitting down for dinner. Fink pokes at her burnt food.]''
:'''Professor Venomous''': Don't play with your food.
:'''Fink''': (growls) But it tastes like foo foo!
:'''Lord Boxman''': (laughs nervously) I think it's time for a toast. To the loveliest and most bestest client in the whole wide world-- Professor Venomous! 
''[Fink holds up a sign depicting an ear of corn, meaning that Boxman's speech is corny.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Whose mastery of bio-engineering is unparalleled and-- ''[Darrell suddenly appears at the table wearing a sailor suit.]'' and a true inspiration to-- Get out of here, Darrell!! (chuckles nervously)
----
:'''Professor Venomous''': You had better have a good explanation for this. 
:'''Fink''': Yeah! Coconut cream?! What were you thinking?! 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Professor, I-I— I… Ooooohh! I’ll destroy those brats for ruining dessert! 
:'''Shannon''': Oh! Are we destroying brats? 
:'''Darrell''': Are having dessert? [A pie is thrown at him] Ugh! [Lord Boxman catches him] Thanks, Dad. [Lord Boxman bends him] Ooh! 
''[Shannon laughs as Lord Boxman takes her arm one by one. K.O., Enid, and Rad continues throwing pies as Lord Boxman builts a cannon. He catches the pies]''
:'''Enid''': Uh, guys, we’re tapped. 
:'''Lord Boxman''': [Rips his coat and shirt and puts his tie around his head] And now you’re trapped! [Fires the pies which pelts the gang] 
:'''Enid''': Ugh! 
:'''Professor Venomous''': Boxman! 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Oh! Professor, please! I-I can explain! I can explain! I can— I can— Okay, I can’t explain. But this was not the way it was supposed— 
:'''Professor Venomous''': [Covers his mouth] May I? 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Oh… yes. By all means. 
''[Enid, K.O., and Rad struggles to get out]''
:'''Professor Venomous''': Dinner parties are just so… stuffy. [Loads the bazooka] But vanquishing heroes— now, that’s much more exciting! 
:'''Fink''': [On top of the bazooka] Fire! 
''[The last pie launches the gang out of Boxmore]''
:'''Fink''': [Laughs] [Falls off] Whoa! Oof! 
:'''Professor Venomous''': I have to be honest, Boxman. I agreed to come tonight with plans to sever our business relationship after dinner. 
:'''Lord Boxman''': [Voice breaking] What?! 
:'''Professor Venomous''': You seemed too distracted lately. Though, now I understand why that was. Hard to find folks who value the sport in squashing heroes. And if all your robots can be as fun as this one, then I’ll gladly order 1,000 of them! 
:'''Lord Boxman''': You… still… want my robots? You still… [Whimpers] …want me? 
''[Professor Venomous chuckles. Lord Boxman laughs and gives Professor Venomous a hug]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Just… Big hug! [Thinking] Oh, Boxy! You really can have it all. [Fink triggers a punching glove to him] Waughhhh! 
''[Fink laughs. The next scene shows the gang still in pie trap]''
:'''K.O.''': W-What is this? 
:'''Enid''': It’s called “losing.” 
:'''Rad''': Would a loser get to travel the open air in a vehicle made of delicious pie? I don’t think so. [Eats the pie]

===''Face Your Fears'' [1.19]===
''[Read and K.O. are trying to get Mr. Gar's attention.]''
:'''Rad and K.O.''': Mr. Gar, Mr. Gar!
:'''Mr. Gar''': Huh?!
:'''Rad''': There's this new game at the arcade called &quot;The Face of Fear&quot;. It makes you face your biggest fears, and adjusts your fear resistance stat depending on how well you do! Look how fearless we've become. ''[shows Mr. Gar his and K.O.'s Pow Cards]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': 10? 15? (growls) You kids and your videos game, pah! I never needed some cockamamie machine to help me face my own fears.
:'''K.O.''': What's your fear resistance, Mr. Gar? I bet it's pretty high.
:'''Mr. Gar''': I haven't checked in a while, it's probably through the roof by now... ''[pulls out his Pow Card and checks his stats]'' It's...8?!
:'''Rad, K.O., and Enid''': 8?!
:'''Mr. Gar''': This is absurd! I-I guess I haven't updated it in a while... Not since I left P.O.I.- (laughs nervously) What I mean to say was, there'd be no ''point'' in me checking, since I'm impervious to fear. Heh, heh.
:'''Enid''': Then I ''guess'' you wouldn't be afraid of playing the game and updating your info?
:'''Mr. Gar''': Heh...

===''Everybody Likes Rad?'' [1.20]===
''[Rad is filming an internet video.]''
:'''Rad''': Rad rocket’s on the roof and ready to roll. ''[Launches a rocket]'' Blorp! ''[Face plants on his camera]'' Rad rocket’s on the roof-- 
''[Enid is shown watching the video.]'' 
:'''Enid''': (laughs)
:'''Rad on video''': Blorp! 
:'''Enid''': (laughs harder) ''[Titlecard appears]'' ''[continues laughing as she shows the video to K.O.]''
:'''Rad on video''': Rad rocket’s on the roof and ready to roll. Blorp!
:'''K.O.''': ''[Drops his broom]'' Oh, no! Rad, you accidentally forgot to cut out the part where you fall through the roof!
:'''Rad''': ''[On the roof]'' Are you kidding? ''[levitates off the roof]'' Whoa! This video is a work of art, K.O.. Every detail is perfect. The setup, the unexpected nature of the fall, the way the rocket launch gets cut off at the end… Mwah! You couldn’t plan something that good.
:'''Enid''': I got to hand it to you, Rad. I can’t not share this.
:'''Rad''': See, K.O.? The joke may be on me, but it’s still my joke. [A part of the roof fall on him.] Blorp!
:'''K.O.''': Rad!
:'''Enid''': (laughs) You’re on a roll today.
''[K.O. picks up the debris to find Rad’s head.]''
:'''Rad''': Please tell me you got that on video.

===''You Have to Care'' [1.21]===
''[Crowd is outside making noise. K.O. and Rad looks out.]''
:'''K.O.''': What’s that?!
:'''Rad''': Whoa!
''[A pink war tank approaches. Shoots out Elodie]''
:'''Elodie''': Greetings, Lakewood Plaze! Elodie has arrived!
:'''Crowd''': Elodie! Elodie!
''[Elodie shoots her arrow which makes signatures on the crowd]''
:'''Brandon''': Sign my chest!
''[The arrow land on the window]''
:'''K.O.''': Wow! It’s really Elodie. ''[gets his Elodie Pow Card out]'' She goes to POINT Prep Academy. They only allow the best of the best. Gee. I want to apply there someday.
:'''Enid''': Huh? ''[slides off the counter and wears a disguise and read a magazine]''
''[The crowd follows Elodie]''
:'''Elodie''': Thank you. Just passing through my favorite hero shop to sign some autographs!
''[A photographer shoots a picture of K.O., Elodie, and Rad. Enid is in the background]''
:'''Elodie''': ''[sees Enid in the photo]'' (gasps) ''[Tosses the photo]'' Enid.
:'''Enid''': Elodie.
:'''Elodie''': Is this what you’ve been up to all this time? Oh, how... quaint. ''[Crowd grabs her as they chant her name]'' Well, toodles! 
''[Rad and K.O. point back and forth]''
:'''Enid''': Grrrr! (gags) I’m taking a break. I’ll be out back. ''[she vanishes and a log with shades takes her place]''
:'''K.O.''': Rad, do you know what’s going on?
:'''Rad''': Almost never.
:'''K.O.''': Something’s wrong with Enid. Elodie showed up, and she started acting all funny.
:'''Rad''': Well, there’s only one way to find out. We just got to ask her until she tells us. Trust me, K.O.. Subtlety is my middle name. ''[enters the break room]'' Hey, Enid! What’s the deal with you and Elodie?! ''[Enid smacks him offscreen]'' Unh! ''[he crashes into a pile of boxes while a small dinosaur appears]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Thinking]'' Hmm. Maybe it’d be better to ask Elodie about this.

===''Plaza Prom'' [1.22]===
''[K.O. is serving drinks at the Plaza Prom.]'' 
:'''K.O.''': Drink, sir? Drink, ma’am? Ma’am, would you like a drink? ''[Sees Carol looking attractive]'' Whoooa! ''[Throws the drinks away]'' You look so beautiful!

:'''Carol''': Ha! You gonna give me the honor of a dance sometime tonight?

:'''K.O.''': I gotta get back to work.

''[Mr. Gar pants and sweats. Drinks the whole punch.]''

:'''Colewort''': ''[Grabs a cup but puts it back]'' Huh? Oh.

:'''Carol''': You serve those appetizers!

:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[Slides through Carol’s sight]'' Hello, Carol. How you-- are you doing?

:'''Carol''': I’m pretty good. Enjoying yourself?

:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[Strained]'' Hello, Carol. How are you doing?

:'''Carol''': Uhh, are you okay, Gene?

:'''Mr. Gar''': ''[Straining more]'' Hello, Carol. How are you doing?

:'''Carol''': ''[Walks away]'' Oh, boy.

''[Mr. Gar pants]''

===''Second First Date'' [1.23]===
''[Cupid, a large muscular man, has just magically appeared in the bodega]''
:'''Cupid''': Love conquers all.
:'''Rad and Enid''': Cupid?!
:'''Cupid''': Two people in this room have unresolved romantic tension. 
''[Cupid gets ready to fire a heart-shaped bazooka]''
:'''Rad and Enid''': (gasps)
''[They duck and K.O. moves out of the way as the blast creates a heart-shaped hole in the shelves and back wall. Potato and Colewort stand up from one of the shelves]''
:'''Potato''': Actually, we're just taking things slow.
:'''Cupid''': Nobody cares!
''[Rad and Enid are trying to tiptoe out of the store, when Cupid stops them]''
:'''Cupid''': It's you two I'm here for. What's your deal?!
:'''Enid''': (chuckles) Me and Rad? (laughs) Never. Pssh. 
:'''Rad''': Never?! That's a funny way to say, &quot;That one time&quot;.
:'''Enid''': You know as well as I do that middle school dating is stricken from the record!
:'''K.O.''': What?! Slow down. You guys dated? Each other?! 
:'''Enid''': It was just one date, K.O. (sighs) It was a long time ago.

===''One Last Score'' [1.24]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''T.K.O.'' [1.25-26]===
:'''Darrell''': Get ready for an extra-special beatdown! 
:'''K.O.''': [Grunts] Powerfist! No! 
''[Darrell punches K.O. when Rad catches him]''
:'''Rad''': Need a hand, kiddo? 
:'''K.O.''': Rad! You’re— 
:'''Rad''': I know, I know. I’m your knight in shining armor. The best of the best. The biceps and the triceps… 
''[Enid dashes through to fight Darrell but Darrell shields himself. Enid finally crashes Darrell sending him flying]''
:'''Enid''': Hyah! Hyah! [Darrell falls to the ground] 
:'''Rad''': Show-off. 
:'''Enid''': Rad, you’re missing the action! 
:'''Rad''': [Sets K.O. down] All right, I’m coming. [Hovers] Yeesh. 
''[Enid and Rad fights Darrell off-screen]''
:'''K.O.''': [Thinking] I spend all my time with cool heroes at the plaza now, but I’m still getting thrashed by Darrells? Why can’t I be strong like Rad and Enid? And how could I call myself a hero when I can’t even shoot a powerfist when I need it? 
----
''[Scene shows an exterior of the Bodega while an alarm is heard. Enid and Rad steps out of the Bodega. A Boxmore box falls from the sky, opening it revealing Darrell]''
:'''Darrell''': Miss me, losers? 
:'''Enid''': We didn’t miss you. We hit you. A lot. Remember? 
:'''Rad''': [Laughs] Whoa! Good one, Enid. Did you get that, K.O.? [Notices K.O. wasn’t in the shot] K.O.? 
:'''Enid''': Mnh-mm. 
:'''Darrell''': [Laughs] Oh, boy. I set you up for that one. It’s cool, though. ‘Cause this time… [Laughs] Oh, just wait. [Turns into a bigger version of himself] This time, I’m gonna get the last laugh! [Launches out several weapons to use] Pretty impressive, huh? Lucky for me, though, I won’t even need to pull punches. [Gets a car and smashes it] Once this cannon charges up, just one blast, and your precious plaza will be obliterated! [Fires up cannon] 
:'''Rad''': I think we might need to get some help for this one. 
:'''Enid''': We stay and fight. 
:'''Rad:''': [Chuckles nervously] That’s another joke, right? 
:'''Enid''': We’ll never make it back in time. Are you with me or not? 
:'''Rad''': Yeah. I’m with you. 
:'''Darrell''': This is it, Lakewood losers! [Enid and Rad prepares] Now… prepare to— [A mysterious figure slices Darrell in half and blows up] 
:'''Rad''': Whoa. [Darrell’s parts falls out and shows K.O.’s alter-ego form, T.K.O.] Dude! That was amazing! 
:'''Enid''': That’s putting it lightly. How did you do that, K.O.?

===''Stop Attacking the Plaza'' [1.27]===
''[Ernesto enters a room where Darrell, Shannon, Raymond, and Jethro are playing a board game.]''
:'''Ernesto''': Hello, little ones. 
:'''Darrell''': Hey, Ernesto! Wanna join us?
:'''Ernesto''': I'm just gonna take this downtime to reeelaaax.
:'''Darrell''': Hmm, yeah. We haven't gotten any orders from Dad in a while. 
:'''Ernesto''': Yeah, he mentioned something about not attacking the plaza for 24 hours or he'll get fired. ''[starts reading newspaper]'' Shame.
:'''Darrell, Shannon, and Raymond''': (gasps)
:'''Darrell''': 24 hours?!
:'''Shannon''': That's...
:'''Raymond''': Terrible! 
:'''Darrell''': Poor Dad! Maybe we should go check on him. Make sure he's okay?
:'''Shannon and Raymond''': Yeah.
----
''[Lord Boxman and his robots are trying to have a family dinner, but Boxman is getting annoyed.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': ENOUGH! Why are you all acting so...strange?
''[Darrell, Shannon, and Raymond look at one another.]''
:'''Darrell''': Well, we know you're not allowed to attack the plaza for a whole day.
:'''Darrell,  Shannon, and Raymond''': You must be truly hurting inside.
:'''Lord Boxman''': Stop! What are you trying to say here? That I'm obsessed?! That I have a...problem?  
''[A thought bubble depicting the plaza appears next to Boxman; he waves it off.]''
:'''Shannon''': Uh, well, yeah. I mean, isn't attacking the plaza kinda, heh, the sole reason we exist?
:'''Raymond''': That is true.
:'''Ernesto''': You got a point there.
:'''Darrell''': Yeah, yeah, I mean, come on. 
:'''Lord Boxman''': Forget you guys! I don't have a problem! You know who has a problem? ''[points to Raymond]'' You with being nosy! I can, too, go a day without attacking the plaza! And I don't need your help to do it! I'll show you all! I'll show ''you''! And I'll show ''you''! And I'll definitely show ''you''... ''[He disappears through a trapdoor in the floor.]''
:'''Jethro''': ''[as he rolls by]'' I am Jethro!
----
''[K.O. is busy mopping the floor, looking bored.]''
:'''K.O.''': (yawns) Man, it's sure been quiet, huh, guys?
''[Rad and Enid are shown sleeping in a bunk bed suspended from the ceiling. The store's door chime dings as Lord Boxman enters. Rad and Enid wake up and change into their normal outfits.]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, finally, a custom-- aah!
''[The trio gets in fighting position.]''
:'''Enid''': What do you want, Boxman? 
:'''Lord Boxman''': You can put those away.
:'''Enid''': ''[takes her foot back]'' Explain. 
''[Boxman pulls out a paper and puts on glasses to read it.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Ahemp. (clears throat) Mi mi mi mi mi miiii. I, uh, Lord Boxman-- me, that is, hereby...vow...to-oo-oo-oo-oo... ''[High-pitched voice]'' stop attacking the plaza. ''[Normal voice]'' Wooow! ''[gets ready to leave]'' That felt great to get that off of my che--
:'''Rad''': ''[stops him]'' Wait a sec! Could you repeat that last part?
:'''Lord Boxman''': D'oh! My bosses say that I can't go a day without attacking you. But! ''[holds up a countdown clock]'' Look at that! One minute left!
:'''Rad''': Seriously? 
:'''Enid''': Oh, come on.  It's 'cause you failed so many times, isn't it?
:'''Lord Boxman''': Nooooo-uh! It's just-- It's driving me crazy and my bosses crazy. So there! Pbbt!
:'''K.O.''': W-what happens if you did attack us?
:'''Lord Boxman'''': I get fired and my business shuts down, why?
:'''Enid''': (sarcastically) Oh, that's so sad. One moment. ''[The trio gets into a huddle.]'' If Boxman attacks us, he'll get fired and leave us alone! ''[They turn back towards him.]'' Fight me, Buttman! 
''[They start poking and teasing him.]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Robots blow!
:'''Enid''': Boxes...are terrible!
:'''K.O.''': ''[hears something on the phone]'' What's that? The president of the universe says all boxes must be replaced with...
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Best friends?! Friendship! Friendship! Friendship! Wow! Yayyyyyyyy! (laughing) 
''[Lord Boxman looks like he's about to snap, but calmly takes a deep breath.]'' 
:'''Lord Boxman''': I have better things to do now than to waste time on you piddling fools. (chuckles) So long, clown babies! Boxman out. (howls) ''[goes outside]''
:'''Enid''': You know, maybe it's for the best. I mean, I don't wanna be the reason that Boxman loses his job.
:'''Rad''': You're right, Enid. Even someone like him doesn't deserve unemployment, just 'cause he's a weird old man. 
:'''K.O.''': We are all very thoughtful and kind, even to our enemies. 
:'''Rad''': Bring it in for a big friend hug.
''[They hug.]''
:'''K.O.''': Mmm! Yay! 
''[The alarm on Boxman's watch beeps, meaning that the 24 hour period is up.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': (laughs evilly) You horrible little brats! ''[tips over a gumball machine]'' Ha-ha-ha-ha! You know what I hate? ''[knocks some jars off of a shelf]'' I-I hate your niceness! He-he. ''[gets up on the counter and spins around]'' Ooh, and I hate your friendliness! (chuckles) ''[Enid gags]'' I hate you kids! ''[kicks the store's rug]'' I hate this bodega! ''[kicks it again]'' I hate Lakewood Plaza Turbo! Bwahaha, yes I do! ''[runs off laughing hysterically]''
----
''[Lord Boxman is in his office with Ernesto.]''
:'''Ernesto''': Sounds like your meeting with Miss Cosma sure went well. You must be glad to be rid of that obsession of yours now, huh?
:'''Lord Boxman''': You know, Ernesto 1701, I learned something interesting about myself in the last 24 hours.
:'''Ernesto''': What's that, sir?
:'''Lord Boxman''': I learned that I don't ''need'' to attack the plaza. ''[gets out a chest and opens it to reveal a button]'' (Evilly) I ''want'' to. ''[pushes the button five times]''
''[Raymond, Darrell, Jethro, Shannon, and Ernesto appear at the plaza and attack K.O., Rad, and Enid.]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': What the?!
''[The robots fight the trio.]''
:'''Lord Boxman''': Never gets old.

===''We've Got Fleas'' [1.28]===
''[K.O. is unsuccessfully trying to fight Mikayla, an animalistic robot from Boxmore. Rad and Enid arrive in Rad's van and jump out.]''
:'''Enid''': Looks like our normal approach isn't working. 
:'''Rad''': She's too unpredictable. It's like fighting a wild animal.
:'''K.O.''': (gasps) That's it!  In times of need, the hero's noble animal companion always sweeps in to win the day! (whistles) Baby Teeth, come forth!
''[Baby Teeth is shown eating nachos in the store, turns, then goes back to eating. We cut back to K.O. with a tear in his eye.]''
:'''Enid''': Any other bright ideas?
:'''K.O.''': Hmm. Well...maybe ''we'' could become animals. 
:'''Rad''': &quot;Become&quot; animals? How would we do that? 
''[The van's door suddenly swings open, revealing Dendy.]''
:'''Dendy''': It's simple. You just need to be bitten by a were-animal.
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Dendy!
:'''Rad''': What were you doing in my van...?
:'''Dendy''': (shows hologram explaining her speech) A were-animal's fangs secrete a special were-enzyme that activates the bitten's inner beast.
:'''K.O.''': A...were-animal?!
:'''Rad''': (chuckles) I think you mean, &quot;Where ''is'' animal&quot;, K.O. 
:'''K.O.''': (laughs, snorts) Yeah, my bad.
''[Enid grabs Rad and K.O. by the hair to look in the distance]''
:'''Enid''': (looking at Crinkly Wrinkly asleep on a bench a few feet away) There animal! Let's get bit.
:'''Rad and K.O.''': (nod) Hmm!
''[The trio runs up to Crinkly Wrinkly with their arms out and jumping.]''
:'''K.O., Rad, and Enid''': Come on! Bite us! Bite us! Bite us! Bite us!
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': (wakes up, startled) Whaaat?! (wheezes)
''[The trio stops jumping]''
:'''Enid''': Look, I know it sounds strange, but I promise you it's for a good reason-- Owww! (she lifts her arm and Crinkly Wrinkly is biting down on it) Ugh! Get off me, you dusty little creep!
''[Enid shakes him off and he lands in K.O.'s hands]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Why, thank ya, sonny! (bites K.O. on the nose)
:'''K.O.''': (holds nose) Oww!
:'''Rad''': (points and laughs)
''[Crinkly Wrinkly opens his mouth wide and bites down on Rad's outstretched hand]''
:'''Rad''': Aaaah! (throws him off)
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': (lands on bottom) Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! I've been wanting to do that for ages!
:'''Enid''': Wait, you ''wanted'' to bite us?!
:'''Rad''': Ew!
:'''K.O.''': You weren't supposed to like it!
:'''Enid''': (rubs her arm in disgust) Ugh! Blek!
:'''Rad''': That cannot be legal.
''[Crinkly Wrinkly is suddenly on board a bus as it drives past the trio]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': Ho Ho Ho! Enjoy your cuuuuurse!
:'''Enid''': Your garbage curse didn't even work, you dank old pillowcase!!!
''[Enid suddenly sprouts a rabbit's tail]''
:'''K.O.''': (points to her) Enid...you have a new ponytail! On your butt!
:'''Enid''': (notices) Oh! Cute! But, I don't think it's a ponytail. It's more of a-- 
''[Her ears change into rabbit ears, her nose turns pink, and she starts growing whiskers. Purple fur starts growing on her hands and arms, then her feet burst out of her shoes and become rabbit's feet.]''
:'''Enid''': (groans, grunts) A bunny! (wiggles her toes) It must be because I'm so... (jumps up in the air and clicks her heels) quick on my feet!
:'''Rad''': Whoa, nice! If your inner animal is fast, then mine must be something totally macho. Like a classic werewolf! (starts growing fur and claws; sprouts a tail) Yeah! I can feel it! (rips shirt off, laughs, then gets a collar with a bell on it) Oh. A cat? Nice. Must be because I'm so... (licks his hand and arm, then slicks back his hair) cleaaan.
:'''K.O.''': Wow! Wow, wow, wow! You guys look so cool! (sprouts a dog's tail) Ah! I can't wait to find out what I'm gonna be! 
:'''Enid and Rad''': A puppy!
:'''Rad''': That is so K.O.! 
:'''Enid''': Of course he's a puppy! (pets K.O. on his head as he grows dog ears and fur) It's perfect, because he's such a good boy! 
:'''Rad''': (starts petting him too) Yeah, who's a good boy?!
:'''K.O.''': Me! Me, me, me!
:'''Enid and Rad''': Yes, you are!
''[Rad is suddenly tackled by Mikayla]''
:'''Enid''': (remembering) Oh, right. Mikayla. Time to use our animal powers to put this monkey business to an end.
:'''Rad''': (while pinned to the ground by Mikayla) Ohhh, she's a monkey? I thought she was some kind of jaguar...guitar...lizard...
''[Rad is about to get scratched by Mikayla, only to get booted by Enid.]''
:'''Enid''': (as she zooms by) Whoooo cares?
:'''Rad''': Well, I'm a little curious.

===''No More Pow Cards'' [1.29]===
''[Dendy and K.O. have broken into the POW Card factory computer room and are being held by a pair of guards. Mr. Cardsley, the company owner, enters the room.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley III''': Put them down, and back away. I’ll take it from here.
:'''Guard''': ''[saluting]'' Yes, Mr. Cardsley III. [leaves]
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': ''[to Dendy and K.O.]'' Now, now, it’s alright. Did you get lost? Tours are back out there, kids!
:'''K.O.''': We are not here for no tour! Well, not today. Right, Dendy?
:'''Dendy''': That is correct.
:'''K.O.''': In fact, we got a bone to pick with you, mister!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Is that so? Alright, I’m all ears.
:'''K.O.''': Mr. Cardsley! All our lives we’ve loved Pow Cards! ''[pulls out his collection]'' See?
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Oh. Very nice.
:'''K.O.''': But then, we found out you don’t let Kappas be recognized as heroes! And that’s the most messed up thing I ever heard! So fix it, (sobbing) plee-eee-ase.
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Well what’s there to fix? I mean, why in the world would Kappas need Pow Cards?
:'''K.O.''': Be...cause! It’s bad to leave them out! Don’t be bad!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': And you’re asking we include them for...what, exactly? Drowning people? Honestly, I’ve never seen a Kappa do anything of significance. Heroic or otherwise, they’re just little monsters. And though we appreciate your feedback here at Pow Industries, this is the system we’ve used for decades. There’s no need to change a thing.
:'''K.O.''': But can’t you see how much it upsets us?!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': (sighs) Look, I'm sorry you’re so upset, kid, but it’s the simple truth.
:'''K.O.''': It’s nowhere near the truth! My friend Dendy here does great things all the time! And- and-! ...Do you even know any Kappas, Mr. Cardsley?
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': I...uhhh...Guards!
:'''Guards''': Yessir!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Please escort these trespassers off the premises.
:'''Guards''': Yessir!
:'''K.O.''': Still? After all my tears?
:'''Dendy''': Please wait...Once more.
:'''Guards''': Aw, c’mon! Just...wanna cuff...so baa-aa-aad! ''[They roll away sobbing]''
:'''Dendy''': Mr. Cardsley. Have you ever considered the reason the world does not view Kappas as heroic is because we don’t have any heroes of our own to look up to? And for those that are out there doing something you’d call noteworthy, we’ll never get to notice, if your computer doesn’t, either. All I request is for us to be given a chance.
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': (sighs) Fine. If you insist on learning the hard way. Carla!
:'''Carla''': ''[gets brought down on a crane]'' Greetings, Mr. Cardsley!
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Carla, my trusty engineer. Can you temporarily allow the hero-puter to detect the Kappa species?
:'''Carla''': I’d love to! Just gimme one minute… ''[A cord shoots from Dendy's hack-pack and connects to the computer.]'' Ooh!
:'''Dendy''': Pardon, I’ve already written an override code for your system.
:'''Carla''': I...just making sure you’re not trying any funny business! (chuckles) It would’ve taken me forever to write this code! Please, press away!
''[Dendy activates the override code. The computer beeps, but then the beeps die out.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Ohh. Sorry, kids. Like I said, Kappa- aaah!
:'''Carla''': Wow!
''[Tons of Kappa suddenly appear on the world map shown on screen.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': What the-? ''[picks up a new Pow Card]'' Hot hot hot hot hot! How can this be? I - was - wrong? I. Can’t. Process. I was - always told I’m right! I - ''[begins sucking his thumb]''
:'''Carla''': Oh, this is fantastic! Our database is flooded with new profiles! Sales have gone through the roof! A new market of Kappas are buying our Pow Cards in droves! This is the biggest sale in the history of the company, Mr. Cardsley!
:'''Employee''': Sir! There’s no place to hold all the Technos!
''[Technos burst through the door. The group is swept away by them into the main hallway.]''
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': ''[to Dendy]'' Young lady. Dendy, was it?
:'''Dendy''': Yes.
:'''Mr. Cardsley''': Dendy, you’ve really taught me something here today. I thank you. And from now on, Pow Cards will recognize the heroic feats of Kappas across the globe! Grandfather would be proud...of how much money we’re making! ''[dives into the pile of Technos]'' Wheee-hee-hee! Woo hoo!

===''A Hero’s Fate'' [1.30]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''Let’s Have a Stakeout'' [1.31]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''Rad Likes Robots'' [1.32]===
{{Section-stub}}
===''KO's Video Channel'' [1.33]===
''[Rad and Enid are watching one of K.O.'s online videos. K.O. is wearing a hoodie with Dendy standing in the background.]''
:'''K.O.''': Hi, guys. I'm here with a special guest, my friend, Dendy. (Dendy waves to camera) She says she has an amazing discovery to show you guys.
''[The scene cuts to Dendy staring into a room with her hands pressed on the window]''
:'''K.O.''': Where are we? Who-- Whose house is this?
:'''Dendy''': Shh! Every morning at exactly 6:15... (gasps) It is happening! Get ready, K.O.! 
''[Rad is shown in his underwear, scratching his butt, and levitating towards a pullup bar in the doorway]''
:'''K.O.''': This is Rad's house? 
''[Dendy watches with a smile on her face as Rad does some pullups]''
:'''K.O.''': Dendy!
:'''Rad''': (turns around) Huh? 
:'''Dendy''': Run!
''[The scene shows Dendy and K.O.'s feet as they run away]''
:'''Dendy''': (laughs)
:'''K.O.''': Dendy, why?
''[Rad sits on the counter in shock at the video he had just watched, while Enid is on the floor laughing]''
:'''Enid''': (laughs) Did that one have enough Radicles for ya? (laughs)

===''The Power is Yours'' [1.34]===

===''Glory Days'' [1.35]===

===''Plazalympics'' [1.36]===

===''Parents Day'' [1.37]===
''[Rad and K.O. are driving around, trying to spy on Enid]''
:'''Rad''': Enid's house should be on this block.
:'''K.O.''': (while looking through the glove compartment) How do you know where Enid lives?
:'''Rad''': I took a look at her personnel file, that's how. 
:'''K.O.''': Hey! That's sneaky!
:'''Rad''': Then I guess you don't want to know any super cool secret facts about Enid, like her favorite color?
''[K.O. tries to resist the curiosity, but can't]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, what is it?! Green?!
:'''Rad''': It's...purple. 
:'''K.O.''': Whoa!
:'''Rad''': (stops the van, looks out the window) K.O., I think this is it! 
:'''K.O.''': Huh?
''[Enid is walking down the street, carrying a duffel bag]''
:'''K.O.''': (gasps) Look, here she comes! 
:'''Rad''': Wait, she's not stopping. 
:'''K.O.''': Where's she going?
''[Enid arrives at a spooky-looking house as thunder crashes overhead]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': What?
''[Enid looks around before reaching into the duffel bag]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': Wha?!
''[Enid pulls a witch's hat out of the duffel bag, puts it on, and is enveloped in a puff of purple smoke. When the dust settles, she is dressed as a witch.]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': (scream)
''[Enid enters the house, leaving K.O. and Rad in shock]''
:'''K.O.''': Whoa! Enid's going trick-or-treating without us?
:'''Rad''': (groans)
''[K.O. and Rad peek through a window to look for Enid]''
:'''K.O.''': Do you see Enid? 
''[A bat flies into the room]''
:'''Rad''': Wait, look!
''[The bat changes into a woman and she fixes her hair]''
:'''Rad''': Enid's mom is...a hot vampire? 
''[A purple-furred werewolf walks up to the woman and kisses her]''
:'''Rad''': And her dad is a hot werewolf? 
:'''K.O.''': Enid's parents are ninjas ''and'' monsters? 
:'''Rad''': I don't think they're ninjas. 
:'''K.O.''': But, why would Enid lie to us?
:'''Enid''': (suddenly appearing at the window) 'Cause it's none of your business, you goons.
:'''K.O. and Rad''': (scream)
:'''Enid''': Shh! You guys need to get out of here.
:'''K.O.''': You said your parents were busy ninjas, but they were just kissing and aren't ninjas. 
:'''Enid''': My family is embarrassing and I like to keep my private life private.  So, you need to go before they see you and--
:'''Wilhamena''': (arrives at the window) Enid! You have guests! Please join us for dinner. 
''[Enid shakes her head as she stares at her friends with skulls in her eyes, motioning for them to say no. K.O. and Rad look at each other.]''
:'''K.O. and Rad''': We'd love to! 
:'''Enid''': Grrrrrrrrr!

===''We Got Hacked'' [1.38]===
:'''K.O.''': Dendy! Dendy, Dendy, Dendy, Dendy! We got... we got problems! 
:'''Dendy''': Hmm. I understand your predicament. (pointing to Gar) Mr. Gar here is overcompensating for his receding hairline with muscles. 
:'''Mr. Gar''': (angrily) Hey! 
:'''Dendy''': (pointing to Rad) Rad is pretending to be super macho, even though he's a big softy. 
:'''Rad''': (embarrassed) Th-That's not true! 
:'''Dendy''': (pointing to the broken mop) We have a cleaning apparatus with a tacky design. 
''[The mop deflates]''
:'''Dendy''': (pointing to Enid who is acting indifferent while picking her nose) Or perhaps, is it how Enid acts super cool because she's internally struggling with her identity. 
:'''Enid''': (embarrassed and puffing her cheeks out) Uh, uh, uh... Absolutely not! 
:'''Dendy''': Hmm. Ah, it must be- 
''[Mr. Gar picks up Dendy]''
:'''Mr. Gar''': The dang mop is malfunctioning! 
''[He drops her to the ground and walks off]''

===''Back in Red Action'' [1.39]===

===''Let's Take a Moment'' [1.40]===

===''Villains' Night Out'' [1.41]===

===''Villains' Night In'' [1.42]===

===''Let's Watch the Pilot'' [1.43]===
''[The episode starts off with montage of Crinkly Wrinkly interviewing a couple of guests.]''
:'''Announcer''': Welcome to “Stage Left,” with Crinkly Wrinkly.
''[Audience cheers and applause. Dynamite Watkins comes in to hit Crinkly Wrinkly with a chair. The titlecard appears. The cameraman gets ready for Dynamite Watkins to host.]''
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': I’m Dynamite Watkins! Your host for tonight--
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly''': My neck!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': For tonight’s highly-anticipated retrospective! Fans of the smash hit TV series, “OK K.O.: Let’s Be Heroes,” prepare to lose your cool! Joining us today is… Enid! ''[Enid comes onstage]'' Rad! ''[Comes onstage as well]''
:'''Rad''': Please donate to my charity-- Tiny Clothes for Tiny Dinos.
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': And K.O.! ''[Audience cheers louder as he comes onstage]''
:'''Audience''': K.O.! K.O.! K.O.!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Wow! ''[K.O. gives kisses]'' K.O. is clearly the crowd favorite. No surprise there. That kid’s a show-stealer! So, “OK K.O.” has taken the world by storm! It’s number one on every network. (Dramatically) And in all our hearts. Did you three ever expect it to become such an explosive success?!
:'''Enid''': Well, I don’t know about the others, but from the very beginning, I could just, like, sense the material was really special, you know?
:'''Rad''': Yeah, I have--
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Well, that’s great. I’ve actually got a relic that can take us all back to the beginning you spoke of. The original pilot-- ''[shows the relic]'' &quot;Lakewood Plaza Turbo&quot;!
:'''Enid, K.O., and Rad''': What?!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': That’s right-- the pilot! And I don’t mean the sap that flies your plane. ''[Displays what a pilot is]'' I’m talking a short sample episode that’s made to test the waters and see if it’s something people would want to watch more of. Right, K.O.?
:'''K.O.''': Well, yeah, but… we’ve come a really long way since the pilot, and it’s not at all representative of our current work, so…
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Whoo, &quot;Lakewood Plaza Turbo&quot;!
''[Audience cheers and applause as the pilot starts airing.]''
:'''Announcer''': In the year, 201X, ''[Displays the robots of Boxmore]'' Lord Boxman opened a store to arm his robot hoard. ''[Cuts to Lakewood Plaza Turbo and the heroes preparing to fight]'' But the heroes of Lakewood Plaza--
:'''Rad and Singing voice''': ♪Are ready to fight!♪
:'''Rad''': (laughs) Oh, man! Remember this old theme song?
:'''K.O. and Singing voice''': ♪K.O., Rad, and Enid are in battle mode♪
:'''Enid and Singing voice''': ♪Punch and kick the bad guys till they all explode♪
:'''K.O., Enid, Rad, and Singing voice''': ♪Power up and fight. Let’s watch an episode of Lakewood Plaza Turbo!♪ ''[K.O. says OK K.O. instead of Plaza Turbo. Rad laughs after he messed up.]''
:'''Rad''': We have fun. Ha-- the plaza looked so different back then.
:'''K.O.''': Whoa! We look so weird.
:'''Enid''': Ugh-- my hair! Sorry. This is just, um… really weird to watch now.
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': It sure is! Please feel free to react out loud during the whole thing.
:'''Enid’s voice''': He’s sleeping again.
''[Rad snores and K.O. dumps ice cream on him.]''
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) Rad got so cold underneath all that ice cream, they had to call in a stunt double!
''[Audience laughs]''
:'''Rad''': Ha. Well, uh, I was on a cleanse, so my skin was super sensitive.
:'''K.O.’s voice''': You looked so peaceful, like a baby lamb.
''[Mega Football Baby and Sparko laughs]''
:'''Enid’s voice''': Gee!
''[Pilot K.O. does something weird with his mouth.]''
:'''Rad''': Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is going on with your mouth there?
:'''K.O.''': It’s an old theater trick we call “jawning.” It, um… keeps the jaw nice and loose, even when you’re not talking.
:'''Rad’s voice''': Ooh! ''[Prepares to shoot K.O. with his finger]''
:'''Rad''': Oh! Did my own stunt here. Shout-out to the effects team.
''[Pilot K.O. grunts]''
:'''Rad’s voice''': It’s just the power poke. You know, a special move?
:'''K.O.’s voice''': “Special move”? Okay, my turn!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': So, K.O., I sense a little conflict between you and Rad here.
:'''K.O.''': Yeah, you know, in this episode, I think he’s the bad guy. But-- spoiler alert-- turns out he’s not the bad guy, and it was totally some other dude. Ha-- the stories can’t get too complicated in pilots.
''[Crowd laughs when K.O. doesn’t do his “special move”]''
:'''K.O.’s voice''': Yeah, well… I’ll soil you!
''[K.O. and Rad fight]''
:'''Enid’s voice''': Cool it!
:'''Crowd''': Fight, fight!
:'''Enid’s voice''': I said, “Cool it!” ''[Uses her power kick]''
:'''K.O.''': Ooh. Enid’s outfit change really was for the best.
:'''Enid''': (chuckles nervously) Well… it was challenging. But the material called for a loin-flap, and I think meeting that challenge made me a stronger performer.
:'''Mr. Gar’s voice''': No! ''[pounds the ground]''
:'''Enid’s voice''': Boss, what happ-- ''[trips on her loin-flap]'' Whoa!
:'''K.O.''': (laughs) Remember how often you’d trip over that thing? ''[Enid continues tripping over her loin-flap]''
:'''Enid''': What?! Why would you show that?!
:'''Dynamite Watkins''': Just cut in a few bloopers to spice things up.

===''Mystery Science Fair 201X'' [1.44]===
''[Dendy and K.O. are trading Paw Cards before class starts]''
:'''Dendy''': Okay, then I will trade you for your… Limited edition Cowboy Darrell!
:'''K.O.''': (Laughs) No way! He’s, like, the rarest villain card I own!
:'''Dendy''': That is not true. You also have… ''[points to the Shadowy Figure Pow Card]'' this one!
:'''K.O.''': Oh. Um, yeah… ''[tries to hide that Pow Card]'' I forgot.
:'''Dendy''': Shadowy Figure never did return after last time, did he?
:'''K.O.''': I think we’ve seen the last of him. Uh, what if I trade you… ''[tries to trade one of his Pow Cards]''
:'''Dendy''': And what of your… turbonic form?
:'''K.O.''': Y-you mean T.K.O.? Well, I guess he’s still inside me somewhere? I-I don’t like thinking about it.
:'''Dendy''': How very fascinating.
:'''Classmate''': Everybody pipe down, will ya?! I think teach is comin-- ''[Miss Quantum slams the door on the kid]''
:'''Miss Quantum''': Morning, class. Everyone have a good weekend?
:'''Classmates''': Yes, Miss Quantum.
:'''Miss Quantum''': Well, that's great, ‘cause I spent mine failing all of your quizzes again! ''[tosses the quizzes]'' What is wrong with all of you?! Did any of you even try?
''[A clock is ticking, a slow fart is heard and classmates laugh]''
:'''Miss Quantum''': Okay, that’s fine. You kids think you’re just too clever for quizzes. Well, in that case, I’ll be looking forward to all your brilliant submissions to this year’s… ''[pulls out a laser gun and blasts words on the chalkboard]'' Mystery Science Fair 201X! ''[The title card appears and the chalkboard falls]''
:'''Nanini''': ''[raises hand]'' But, Miss Quantum, I thought you-- 
''[A buzzer is heard and books fall on her]''
:'''Miss Quantum''': What have I told you about raising your hand? ''[Nanini raises her hand]'' Yes, Nanini?
:'''Nanini''': I thought you said the science fair was optional.
:'''Miss Quantum''': Oh! Oh, I did say that, didn’t I? ''[breathes fire]'' Well, I changed my mind! You are all now required to submit a project for the fair… by tomorrow!
''[Classmates groan]''
:'''Genesis''': That’s so unfair! There’s not enough time!
:'''Miss Quantum''': Oh, quit your boo-hooin’ and get crackin’. Unless, of course, you’d rather be suspended from school like poor Lil’ Bobo out there.
''[Bobo is shown to be tied up and literally suspending from school]''
:'''Bobo''': Boo-hoo. Boo-hoo. Boo-hoo.
:'''Miss Quantum''': The winner will receive a blue ribbon and extra credit. ''[shows a hologram of a blue ribbon]'' But I must warn you, I’m not easily impressed. Dendy. ''[glares at Dendy]'' Now get to work!
:'''K.O.''': Oh! What do we do?!
:'''Dendy''': Do not worry, K.O.. I have the perfect idea for our project. 
''[A cheering sound effect is heard]''
:'''K.O.''': Oh, Dendy! What’s it gonna be about?
:'''Dendy''': Unleashing T.K.O..
:'''K.O.''': Wait, what!?
''[Bell rings. K.O. is seen dragging himself to Dendy’s legs]''
:'''K.O.''': (crying) Dendy, why?! ''[sobs and sniffles]''
:'''Dendy''': (sighs) Allow me to explain. ''[shows a demonstration of their science fair]'' You, K.O., are the only person I know with the ability to harness energy as T.K.O.! If I could identify what it is exactly that triggers your turbonic transformation, it’d be a scientific breakthrough!
:'''K.O.''': But it’s scary bein’ T.K.O.! I lose all control! (gasps) What if I hurt someone again?! What if I hurt you?!
:'''Dendy''': Oh, K.O., I assure you ''[opens locker]'' we will be perfectly safe in a controlled environment, using only state-of-the art equipment. Now, please, step inside.
:'''K.O.''': Mm! Okay, Dendy, I trust you. ''[steps inside the locker]'' Just no needles or anything, okay?

===''RMS &amp; Brandon's First Episode'' [1.45]===
''[Mad Sam has just threatened RMS and Brandon to frame his helmet.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': (sighs) Here we are again, fearing for our lives, framing-- ''[Grabs the helmet]'' gah-- junk. I like hanging out with you all the time, but don’t you ever feel… trapped?
:'''Brandon''': Speak for yourself! Despite the couple wackos, this place rules! Plus, it’s like the easiest job in the world!
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Is it, though?
:'''Brandon''': Yeah! Everything’s easy with you around! Now, let’s get to work… after I take a nap.
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Huh? ''[Brandon hops on the counter with newspapers to nap.]'' Now? ''[Brandon snores]'' But we gotta frame Mad Sam’s helmet! I just don’t get paid enough for any of this! Look at him… so peaceful. Not a care in the world. Must be nice to be so willfully complacent. Huh?
''[Newsprint reads “Looking 4 Bigger and Better Things?” Zooms in to “Coffee Shop Looking 4 Barista Apply Now!!!!! Zooms in another text.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': &quot;25 more pennies an hour&quot;? This could be just what I need to get out of this funk. Watching Brandon sleep can be fun sometimes, but maybe it’s time for me to move up in the world! Sorry, Brandon, but I’ve gotta get that job! 
''[Scene cuts to A Real Magic Skeleton filling a resume on a computer.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Well, let’s see. Special skills. Uh… Framing proficien--Ugh, no, that’s dumb. Does magic count as a special skill? ''[A clang sound is heard.]'' Maybe I should-- ''[Another clang sound is heard.]'' Wha-- ''[And another. RMS' head is enveloped in purple flames.]'' Ooh, my geez, why?! What are you doing?!
:'''Brandon''': I’m trying to get Mad Sam’s helmet in this display case. ''[Slams the helmet]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Ugh! ''[Brandon slams again]'' You’re driving me nuts! Brandon, my dude, I love you, but I’m so glad I’m applying for a new job.
:'''Brandon''': New job?!
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Yep! And with the extra 25 pennies a week, it’ll only take me, like… 2,000 years to become a millionaire! And once I have that much money, I’ll be able to do the things I always dreamed of. 
''[He dreams of buying a steak with bone.]''
:'''Employee''': Here ya go.
''[RMS gets his order and leaves a dollar in the tips jar. Cut back to the present.]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': Ahh!
:'''Brandon''': So you’re just gonna turn your back on all the cool stuff we do here? Like when we duct-taped each other to the walls? Or that time I took all your bones and hid them around the store.
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': I didn’t like when you did that! I need my bones.
:'''Brandon''': Well, what about the time we thought we were level 100 and fought Big Darrell. ''[Imagines fighting Big Darrell]''
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': That was K.O..
:'''Brandon''': Okay, well, still… our jobs are great! Think about how sweet our future will be, working here together, forever. ''[Echos]'' Forever… forever… forever.
''[Imagines Crinkly Wrinkly burying Brandon and him in the store.]''
:'''Crinkly Wrinkly and Brandon''': Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo!
:'''A Real Magic Skeleton''': (shudders) ''[He checks his phone to see Drupe messaging him.]'' Mm. Come on. Drupe picked up some sour candy.
:'''Brandon''': Oh, whoo! Whoo, whoo, whoo!

===''Lad and Logic'' [1.46]===

===''OK Dendy! Let's Be K.O.!'' [1.47]===
''[The evil robot attack alarm goes off]''
''[We're shown Gar's Bodega getting on defense mode as Potato and Holo Jane flee, multiple screams can be heard in the background]''
:'''Cookie Man''': [Hands up his face] EVIL ROBOT ATTACK! 
''[A Boxmore robot box falls from the sky, Enid and Rad hurry outside the Bodega and Dendy follows behind while humming and walking on a much slower pace. The box's walls fall only to reveal the robot sent in by Boxman is Ernesto.]''
:'''Ernesto''': [Nervously reading to himself the lines he's supposed to use off some papers] Uh... Okay... Greetings Lakewood, I am Ernesto, here from Boxmore... Your demise.... [He hums to himself before realizing he's already supposed to be fighting] OH! UM. [Quickly glances over at his papers] Greetings! Plaza!-.. Uh-..[Looks at his papers again] Turbians. I am... [Looks at his papers again] Ernesto. The... Uh-.. Boxmore business bot. [Puts his canon arm up] And I am here.. To, uh, destroy... [Points his canon arm at the heroes but nothing happens, so he awkwardly moves it up and down to try to get it to work. The only thing to come out of the canon is air. Ernesto grows tense] Your plaza! 
:'''Rad''': This is sad. 
:'''Enid''': [Pats Dendy on the head] Don't worry about this chump, Dendy. We'll handle him. [Winks at Dendy and puts her thumb up] 
:'''Dendy''': Okay! 
''[Enid and Rad prepare themselves to attack Ernesto]''
:'''Dendy''': [Thinking] No... I'm filling-in for K.O., and K.O. would not simply chill at the prospect of battle. [Speaking] I must consult the list to see what he'd do! [Looks at K.O.'s schedule] &quot;Learn life lesson&quot;! I see! This is the climax of K.O.'s day, where he learns something wholesome. I've been trying to imitate K.O. this whole time but maybe the lesson I learned and, therefore, the secret of defeating this robot, is just to be myself! [Thinking] Yeah... That sounds correct. [Speaking] Ernesto! 
:'''Rad and Enid''': What?! 
:'''Dendy''': For a business bot, you're very inefficient. You haven't laid a single attack on the Plaza since you landed. 
:'''Ernesto''': W-Well... I was about to get there. 
:'''Dendy''': No! Over rot speeches and flimsy weapons are tools of lesser robots. As a business bot you should set aside those inferior tactics and just cut to the chase. 
:'''Ernesto''': Ha, maybe you're right! I don't need to copy the other robots to destroy the Plaza! I'm just gonna BE MYSELF! [He turns into a ball with only his arms out as some jazz music starts playing, then, using his arms' help he jumps backwards and becomes a full ball] 
''[ Rad and Enid exclaim as they jump in order to dodge Ernesto's attack, Dendy gets run over by the robot and then is punched into the ground.]''
:'''Rad''': Dendy! Why'd you give him constructive criticism?! That just made him stronger! 
:'''Enid''': [Groans] Who cares! [She jumps back into action and prepares to air-kick Ernesto] He's not strong enough for this! 
''[Enid's attack cuts Ernesto in half]''
:'''Rad''': Nice, Enid! 
''[Suddenly both of Ernesto's halves start chasing after Enid and Dendy, Rad is able to use his levitation beam to stop them from hitting his friends]''
:'''Enid''': Oh-oh! Rad! 
:'''Rad''': I gotcha! 
''[Ernesto's limbs break the beam and his arms grab Rad by the waist, knocking him on the ground over and over until finally sticking him down for good]''
:'''Rad''': [Groans while immobilized] 
:'''Enid''': Rad! 
''[Ernesto's foot kicks Enid in the face just as she calls out for her friend's name, making her fall on the ground. Enid yells as she kicks Ernesto's legs, while he kicks back. She manages to throw the lower half of Ernesto into the sky but it comes back and smashes her on the ground]''
:'''Rad''': [Is unable to free himself from Ernesto's grip] HOW ARE WE LOSING?! [Gets slapped by Ernesto's tie] 
:'''Enid''': [Struggling to defend herself from Ernesto's attacks] We-... Need-... K.O.! 
:'''Dendy''': [Thinking] I see! Being my normal self isn't enough. They don't need Dendy right now... [Speaking] They need K.O.! And if K.O. is not here, [Stares at her holographic screen] I must become K.O. in my own way! [Starts typing things out on her screen, and takes on the shape of a giant K.O.] Untend them Ernesto! They're not your opponent, I AM! 
''[Ernesto throws both Enid and Rad into the air and prepares to fight Dendy, he throws a punch at her but she grabs his first and pushes him back. Ernesto nearly loses balance but then he goes and tries to punch Dendy again, she manages to punch him first which throws him onto the ground. Ernesto quickly gets up and runs towards her, she tries to punch him but he blocks her attack. The two start throwing punches at each other but neither seem to be able to hit the other. Finally, Dendy manages to punch Ernesto in the stomach which throws him on the ground.]''
:'''Ernesto''': Oh... Jeez... Just being myself isn't helping to destroy the Plaza either! [Closes his one eye in shame] My failure figures are skyrocketing. 
:'''Dendy''': [Is breathing heavily because of the tiresome fight she just went through] Ernesto... We should appreciate the irony of this situation, I thought I needed to be myself, [Puts her hand on her chest] but I needed to copy someone else in my own way. 
:'''Ernesto''': Uh?.. Is this still about my thing? 
:'''Dendy''': No. [Punches Ernesto back into Boxmore] 
:'''Rad''': Dendy! THAT WAS AMAZING!!! 
:'''Enid''': Yeah! You should fill-in for K.O. everyday!!! 
:'''Dendy''': [Sighs] No, thank you! I thought I knew everything about K.O., but it seems the one thing I do not understand is how he does this everyday. This job is very tiring... Besides, I think it's best to leave being K.O., to the real K.O.. 
''[A bus titled &quot;Old Folks Home&quot; suddenly pulls over and K.O. gets out of it while wearing a red shirt that reads &quot;worlds' gratest grampso n&quot; and with three balloons on his hand]''
:'''K.O.''': Hi, guys! I'm back! What'd I miss? 
:'''Rad and Enid''': K.O.!! [start talking at the same time about their battle against Ernesto and Dendy's help] 
''[Dendy checks out the item &quot;tender moment&quot; off K.O.'s schedule and the episode ends]''

===''Plaza Shorts'' [1.48]===

===''Let's Not Be Skeletons'' [1.49]===

===''Action News'' [1.50]===

===''The Perfect Meal'' [1.51]===

===''Hope This Flies'' [1.52]===
''[Rad and Red Action are racing each other and just zoomed by a trailer park. Red is in the lead.]''
:'''Rad''': Stupid mobile suburbs! ''[He and Red enter Rumble Range]'' Now that we’re out of that maze, there’s no way I’ll lose. ''[Catches up to Red]''
:'''Red Action''': Man, you must like the taste of my dust!
:'''Rad''': ''[Licks the dust]'' Not bad. Could use some more debris an-- Hey! (grumbles) I’ll show you! ''[Tries to move his stick-shift higher]'' No! I’m already going as fayste as I can! ''[Slowing down]'' We’re already going through Rumble Range! At this rate, Red’s gonna win. Eh. What the-- ''[Sees the Dendysoft Help System]'' I don’t remember adding this. ''[Pushes a button where a holographic form of Dendy appears.]''
:'''Dendy''': Greetings, operator.
:'''Rad''': Aah! Demon! Don’t eat-- Dendy?!
:'''Dendy''': A facsimile of Dendy, and as such, I’m programmed to help in a variety of ways.
:'''Rad''': You snuck into ''my'' van and messed with ''my'' stuff?!
:'''Dendy''': Please select a--
:'''Rad''': I don’t want your help! ''[Smashes the help system]'' I just gotta… um… That’s it! The volcano! While she’s comin’ ''round'' the mountain, I’ll be going ''over'' it. I’m a smart booooooy! ''[Drives to the volcano]''
:'''Enid''': ''[As a note]'' False.
:'''Rad''': Time to fly. Launching the Rad Wing. ''[The wing, which is just a giant paper airplane, replaces the rocket launcher. Flies over the volcano.]'' Engaging thrusters. Y-e-e-es! I did it! I-- ''[The thruster burns the wing.]'' Noooooooooo! ''[The van falls into the volcano, plummeting to the lava.]'' Aaaaaaaaaaah!
:'''Dendy''': Perhaps ''I'' can be of assistance.
:'''Rad''': Demon! Dendy? How long have you been there?
:'''Dendy''': The entire time.
:'''Rad''': ''[grabs Dendy]'' Well, don’t just sit there adorably. Help!
:'''Dendy''': You… want my help?
:'''Rad''': Oh, Dendy, I shouldn’t have refused your help before. And now it’s my fault we’re gonna take a lava bath. I’ll do ''anything'' to atone.
:'''Dendy''': Stick your finger in the ignition.
:'''Rad''': Okay-- if it’ll atone.
:'''Dendy''': No, Radicles. You can use your beam power to fuel the zero-point energy engine I secretly installed.
:'''K.O.''': ''[As a note]'' I helped!
:'''Rad''': Oh, okay. That makes sense. ''[Takes off the keys and stick his finger to the ignition and uses his beam power. The van levitates away from the lava.]'' I did it! I did it, I did it, I did it!
:'''Dendy''': Aren’t you forgetting something?
:'''Rad''': Oh, yeah. Y-You, uh… helped.
:'''Dendy''': The race!
:'''Rad''': (gasps deeply) ''[Drives around the volcano]'' But there’s no way we’ll catch up! ''[His van flies through]''
:'''Dendy''': That’s not entirely true.
''[Enid leans on a pole of the finish line texting.]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[Waves flags]'' Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
:'''Dendy''': I may have made some more secret mods to your van. ''[Pushes the faystest button to upgrade Rad’s van.]''
:'''Red Action''': Whoa! Cool!
''[Rad's van zooms past Red's tank.]''
:'''Rad''': We’re… gonna… win!
:'''K.O.''': Whoo-hoo-hoo!
:'''K.O. and Enid''': Aah!
''[The van flies by the finish line and Rad pushes the brakes, but it doesn’t stop.]''
:'''Rad''': Why aren’t we stopping?!
:'''Dendy''': I had counted on you accepting my help much sooner!
''[The van crashes into the Bodega and sets it on fire. K.O. drives his go-kart and Red Action drives her tank to see.]''
:'''Enid''': ''[Takes off sunglasses]'' Rad!
:'''K.O.''': Dendy!
''[Dendy carries Rad out of the mess.]''
:'''Enid, K.O., and Red Action''': Whew!
:'''Rad''': (groans) Wha… My van!
:'''Dendy''': Do not worry, Radicles. We will repair your van. Besides, you won the race.
:'''Rad''': No, Dendy. ''We'' won. Did we-- Did we blow up the bodega?
:'''Dendy''': ''[Whispering]'' Shh! Don’t draw attention to us.

===''You're in Control'' [1.53–54]===

== [[OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes (Season 2)|Season 2]] ==

===''Seasons Change'' [2.01]===

===''Lord Cowboy Darrell'' [2.02]===

===''Plaza Film Festival'' [2.03]===

===''Be A Team'' [2.04]===

===''My Fair Carol'' [2.05]===

===''Let's Watch the Boxmore Show'' [2.06]===

===''Your World is an Illusion'' [2.07]===

===''The So-Bad-ical'' [2.08]===

===''Point to the Plaza'' [2.09]===

===''TKO's House'' [2.10]===

===''Red Action to the Future'' [2.11]===

===''Dendy's Power'' [2.12]===

===''Special Delivery'' [2.13]===

===''Wisdom, Strength and Charisma'' [2.14]===

===''Bittersweet Rivals'' [2.15]===
 
===''Are You Ready for Some Megafootball?!'' [2.16]===

===''Mystery Sleepover'' [2.17]===

===''Crossover Nexus'' [2.18]===
:'''K.O.''': Hey, what's this spooky dump? And where are my friends?
:'''Strike''': I am Strike. Howdy, hero -- and toodle loo!
:'''K.O.''': What, me?! I-I'm still just a hero in training.
:'''Strike''': Yeah, I don't care. ''[activates his pen to destroy K.O. as he whimpers but Garnet saves him just in time]''
:'''K.O.''': Huh? Wha-- Who?
:'''Garnet''': No time for introductions.
:'''Ben Tennyson''': Guys, this way! Come on!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Four Arms''': It's hideous!
:'''K.O.''': Huh? Who are all these guys?
:'''Garnet''': They must be heroes that couldn't escape Strike's…strike. Let's keep moving.
:'''Four Arms''': Man, if Strike X'ed all these guys, he must be may stronger than I thought.
:'''K.O.''': If all these heroes couldn't stop him, what could the three of us possibly do?
:'''Raven''': ''[off-screen]'' Do what he isn't expecting, and go to his lair.
:'''K.O.''': That's a great idea, Garnet!
:'''Garnet''': I didn't say anything, K.O.
:'''K.O.''': Ben?
:'''Four Arms''': Dude, did that honestly sound like my voice to you?
:'''Raven''': I said it.
:'''K.O.''': ''[gasps as he sees her stuck to the wall]'' A hero!
:'''Raven''': Hi.
:'''K.O.''': ''[runs over and tries to get her unstuck]'' You've got X'ed by Strike, but you can still talk and stuff?
:'''Raven''': I got protection spell off just before he X'ed me. ''[Garnet punches the wall with her gauntlet, freeing her]'' Thanks…you?
:'''Garnet''': Garnet.
:'''K.O.''': K.O.!
:'''Four Arms''': Four Arms -- and Ben -- and, like, a bunch of other guys, too --
:'''Garnet''': ''[covers Four Arms' mouth]'' We need to know who you are and what this place is.
:'''Raven''': I'm part of a group of superheroes called the Teen Titans. My name's Raven. Uh, excuse me? ''[&quot;Magician&quot; changes to &quot;half-Azarathian, half-demon sorceress&quot;]'' That's better. Before I got X'ed out, I learned this used to be a great city of heroes, but Strike appeared and stole everyone's powers. He was still hungry, so he started summoning heroes from other dimensions to destroy. If we don't stop him, there'll be no heroes left…anywhere.
:'''K.O.''': But why would he do something so cob-darn awful?
:'''Raven''': Eh, it's his thing. It's what he does. He's like evil, you know pure evil or whatever.
:'''Four Arms''': Seems like this dude always has the element of surprise.
:'''Garnet''': Maybe we should surprise him, and ambush him at his lair.
:'''Raven''': That was literally the first thing I said.
:'''K.O.''': Raven, wanna join us?
:'''Raven''': Eh, I don't know. I was having such a great time as a lifeless statue.
:'''K.O.''': ''[hugs Raven joyfully]'' Ooh, a new friend! You can be the brains of our team.
:'''Raven''': As usual.
:'''K.O.''': Hey, Raven? Where is this evil lair anyway?
:'''Raven''': Over there -- the giant fortress just past the impassable chasm.
:'''K.O.''': Oh, okay. Neat.
:'''Raven''': Ehh. Still smarter than Beast Boy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ben Tennyson''': Hey, jerk!
:'''Strike''': What?
:'''Raven, K.O., Garnet, and Ben Tennyson''': OK Ben Let's Go Universe!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ben Tennyson''': My Omnitrix! Why isn't this thing working?!
:'''K.O.''': Ben! It's okay! Your Omni-thingy was made with Strike's power, and he has the power to summon any hero into this world.
:'''Ben Tennyson''': (''chuckles'') I see where your going with this. It's Hero Time!
:'''K.O.''': You just need… a power fist! Because my penis is way more powerful than stupid shrek!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ben Tennyson''': Well, time to get going. Bye, guys! Gwen's gonna flip when she hears about this.

===''Monster Party'' [2.19]===

===''Super Black Friday'' [2.20]===

===''Final Exams'' [2.21]===

===''Soda Genie'' [2.22]===

===''Carol Quest'' [2.23]===

===''Plaza Alone'' [2.24]===

===''Boxman Crashes'' [2.25]===

===''All in the Villainy'' [2.26]===

===''Sidekick Scouts'' [2.27]===

===''Whacky Jaxxyz'' [2.28]===

===''Project Ray Way'' [2.29]===

===''I Am Jethro'' [2.30]===

===''GarQuest'' [2.31]===

===''Gar Trains Punching Judy'' [2.32]===

===''Beach Episode'' [2.33]===

===''OK A.U.! Alternate Universe'' [2.34]===

===''K.O.'s Health Week'' [2.35]===

===''Rad's Alien Sickness'' [2.36]===

===''Dark Plaza'' [2.37–38]===

==[[OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes (Season 3)|Season 3]]==

===''We Are Heroes'' [3.01]===

===''K.O., Rad, and Enid!'' [3.02]===

===''T.K.O. Rules!'' [3.03]===

===''Chip's Damage'' [3.04]===

===''K.O. vs. Fink'' [3.05]===

===''The K.O. Trap'' [3.06]===

===''Whatever Happened to... Rippy Roo?'' [3.07]===

===''Planet X'' [3.08]===

===''Deep Space Vacation'' (&lt;big&gt;100&lt;/big&gt;{{small|th}} episode) [3.09]===

===''Let's Meet [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]]'' [3.10]===
:'''K.O.''': Alright, Rad and Enid, are you ready for another action-packed day of protecting our hero plaza from evil robots?
:'''Rad''': Sorry, K.O., we stayed up all night playing videos game. I'm so tired, I don't care what happens. I'm gonna sleep through all of it! (''snores'')
:'''Enid''': Seconded.
:'''K.O.''': Bu-but… working at Gar's means we must always be alert! You never know when a legendary hero might 3D blast through our doors!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sonic''': You be careful now, kid. ''[puts down Nanini]'' Can't have anyone getting hurt on my watch.
:'''Genesis and Nanini''': ''[excitedly]'' It's really him! ''[run off, squealing]''
:'''K.O.''': ''[gasps]'' Can it be? Are you ''the'' legendary Sonic the Hedgehog with a Power Level of Ring?!
:'''Sonic''': The one and only, yep.

===''Big Reveal'' [3.11]===

===''Radical Rescue'' [3.12]===

===''Let's Get Shadowy'' [3.13]===

===''You're a Good Friend, K.O.'' [3.14]===

===''Red Action 3: Grudgement Day'' [3.15]===

===''Carl'' [3.16]===

===''Dendy's Video Channel'' [3.17]===

===''Let's Fight to the End'' [3.18-19]===
:'''Shadowy Venomous''': I THINK YOU'RE FORGETTING YOUR PLACE, BOY!

===''Thank You For Watching the Show'' [3.20]===
:'''K.O.''': ''[last lines]'' Thank you for watching the show!

==Cast==
*{{w|Stephanie Nadolny}} (Episodes 1, 4-6) and {{w|Courtenay Taylor}} (rest of the series) – K.O.
*{{w|Ashly Burch}} – Enid
*{{w|Ian Jones-Quartey}} – Radicles (Rad), Darrell
*{{w|David Herman}} – Mr. Gar, Jethro
*{{w|Kate Flannery}} – Carol
*{{w|Melissa Fahn}} – Dendy
*{{w|Jim Cummings}} – Lord Boxman
*{{w|Kari Wahlgren}} – Shannon
*{{w|Robbie Daymond}} – Raymond

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* [http://ok-ko.wikia.com/wiki/OK_K.O.!_Wiki] &amp;ndash; OK K.O.! Wiki page
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:2010s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated action TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero TV shows]]
[[Category:Crossover animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Superhero comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Teen superhero TV shows]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network original series]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]</text>
      <sha1>4qk4qbbil39twxzzfigwp6qgel3114y</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Izumi Shikibu</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>198867</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965269</id>
      <parentid>3574654</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:13:17Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */ gmt</comment>
      <origin>3965269</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2022" sha1="764ex0g7nlebsvibpdssfr4v2wo1y5g" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Izumi Shikibu.png|thumb|Out of the dark,&lt;br /&gt;Into a dark path&lt;br /&gt;I now must enter:&lt;br /&gt;Shine on me from afar,&lt;br /&gt;Moon of the mountain fringe!]]
'''[[w:Izumi Shikibu|Izumi Shikibu]]''' (Japanese: 和泉式部, b. 976?) was a mid [[w:Heian period|Heian period]] [[Japanese]] poet.
{{author-stub}}
==Quotes==
*暗きより暗き道にぞ入りぬべき遙かに照らせ山の端の月
* Kuraki yori&lt;br /&gt;Kuraki michi ni zo&lt;br /&gt;lrinubeki&lt;br /&gt;Haruka ni terase&lt;br /&gt;Yama no ha no tsuki.
** '''Out of the dark,&lt;br /&gt;Into a dark path&lt;br /&gt;I now must enter:&lt;br /&gt;Shine on me from afar,&lt;br /&gt;Moon of the mountain fringe!'''
** Translated by [[w:Arthur Waley|Arthur Waley]]
** &quot;Said to be [Izumi Shikibu's] death-verse; the moon may refer to Buddha's teachings.&quot; ''Anthology Of Japanese Literature'' (1955) by Donald Keene, p. 92
** Included in the ''[[w:Shūi Wakashū|Shūi Wakashū]]'' (c.  1005)

==Quotes about Izumi Shikibu ==
*Lady Izumi Shikibu corresponds charmingly, but her behaviour is improper indeed. She writes with grace and ease and with a flashing wit. There is fragrance even in her smallest words. Her poems are attractive, but they are only improvisations which drop from her mouth spontaneously. Every one of them has some interesting point, and she is acquainted with ancient literature also, but she is not like a true artist who is filled with the genuine spirit of poetry. Yet I think even she cannot presume to pass judgment on the poems of others.
** [[Murasaki Shikibu]], ''The Diary of Murasaki Shikibu'' (c. 1010). In: ''Diaries of Court Ladies of Old Japan'',  edited and translated by  Annie Shepley Omori and Kochi Doi, 1920. Archived at [[s:Diaries of Court Ladies of Old Japan/2|English Wikisource]].

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wikisource-author}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Izumi, Shikibu}}
[[Category:Poets from Japan]]
[[Category:10th century births]]
[[Category:11th century deaths]]
[[Category:People from Kyoto]]
[[Category:Buddhists from Japan]]
[[Category:Buddhism and women]]</text>
      <sha1>764ex0g7nlebsvibpdssfr4v2wo1y5g</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965270</id>
      <parentid>3965269</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:13:45Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes about Izumi Shikibu */</comment>
      <origin>3965270</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2023" sha1="r7dinhjxwul3799l5rrktylgu54p1om" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Izumi Shikibu.png|thumb|Out of the dark,&lt;br /&gt;Into a dark path&lt;br /&gt;I now must enter:&lt;br /&gt;Shine on me from afar,&lt;br /&gt;Moon of the mountain fringe!]]
'''[[w:Izumi Shikibu|Izumi Shikibu]]''' (Japanese: 和泉式部, b. 976?) was a mid [[w:Heian period|Heian period]] [[Japanese]] poet.
{{author-stub}}
==Quotes==
*暗きより暗き道にぞ入りぬべき遙かに照らせ山の端の月
* Kuraki yori&lt;br /&gt;Kuraki michi ni zo&lt;br /&gt;lrinubeki&lt;br /&gt;Haruka ni terase&lt;br /&gt;Yama no ha no tsuki.
** '''Out of the dark,&lt;br /&gt;Into a dark path&lt;br /&gt;I now must enter:&lt;br /&gt;Shine on me from afar,&lt;br /&gt;Moon of the mountain fringe!'''
** Translated by [[w:Arthur Waley|Arthur Waley]]
** &quot;Said to be [Izumi Shikibu's] death-verse; the moon may refer to Buddha's teachings.&quot; ''Anthology Of Japanese Literature'' (1955) by Donald Keene, p. 92
** Included in the ''[[w:Shūi Wakashū|Shūi Wakashū]]'' (c.  1005)

==Quotes about Izumi Shikibu ==
*Lady Izumi Shikibu corresponds charmingly, but her behaviour is improper indeed. She writes with grace and ease and with a flashing wit. There is fragrance even in her smallest words. Her poems are attractive, but they are only improvisations which drop from her mouth spontaneously. Every one of them has some interesting point, and she is acquainted with ancient literature also, but she is not like a true artist who is filled with the genuine spirit of poetry. Yet I think even she cannot presume to pass judgment on the poems of others.
** [[Murasaki Shikibu]], ''The Diary of Murasaki Shikibu'' (c. 1010). In: ''Diaries of Court Ladies of Old Japan'',  edited and translated by  Annie Shepley Omori and Kochi Doi, 1920. Available at [[s:Diaries of Court Ladies of Old Japan/2|English Wikisource]].

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{wikisource-author}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Izumi, Shikibu}}
[[Category:Poets from Japan]]
[[Category:10th century births]]
[[Category:11th century deaths]]
[[Category:People from Kyoto]]
[[Category:Buddhists from Japan]]
[[Category:Buddhism and women]]</text>
      <sha1>r7dinhjxwul3799l5rrktylgu54p1om</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Shu Ting</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>199452</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965272</id>
      <parentid>3949983</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:42:44Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */ add the Chinese</comment>
      <origin>3965272</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4555" sha1="8pvy7puni9n4ctb3d92ieif9nsjhtea" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Spitze-der-Goettin.jpg|thumb|Instead of being on display on the cliff for a thousand years&lt;br /&gt;I'd rather have a hearty cry on my lover's shoulder for a single night.]]

'''[[w:Shu Ting|Shu Ting]]''' ([[Chinese language|Chinese]]: 舒婷; [[w:Pinyin|pinyin]]: ''Shū Tíng''; born 1952) is the pen name of '''Gong Peiyu''' (Chinese: 龚佩瑜; pinyin: ''Gōng Pèiyú''), a [[Chinese poet]] associated with the [[w:Misty Poets|Misty Poets]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Bombax ceiba tree'.jpg|thumb|I would be a kapok tree by your side&lt;br /&gt;Standing with you—&lt;br /&gt;both of us shaped like trees.]]
[[File:Quercus variabilis JPG1a.JPG|thumb|You have your bronze boughs and iron trunk&lt;br /&gt;Like knives and swords]]
[[File:Semal (Bombax ceiba) flowers in Kolkata W IMG 4132.jpg|thumb|I have my red flowers&lt;br /&gt;Like heavy sighs,&lt;br /&gt;Also like heroic torches.]]
[[File:Supernumerary rainbow 01 contrast.jpg|thumb|We share cold waves, storms and thunderbolts;&lt;br /&gt;Together we savor fog, haze and rainbows.&lt;br /&gt;We seem to always live apart,&lt;br /&gt;But actually depend upon each other forever.]]

* If I love you—&lt;br /&gt;I never behave like a climbing trumpet vine&lt;br /&gt;Using your high branches to show myself off;&lt;br /&gt;If I love you—&lt;br /&gt;I never mimic infatuated little birds&lt;br /&gt;Repeating monotonous songs into the shadows,&lt;br /&gt;Nor do I look at all like a wellspring&lt;br /&gt;Sending out its cooling consolation all year round,&lt;br /&gt;Or just another perilous crag&lt;br /&gt;Augmenting your height, setting off your prestige.&lt;br /&gt;Nor like the sunlight&lt;br /&gt;Or even spring rain.&lt;br /&gt;No, these are not enough.&lt;br /&gt;I would be a kapok tree by your side&lt;br /&gt;Standing with you—&lt;br /&gt;both of us shaped like trees.&lt;br /&gt;Our roots hold hands underground,&lt;br /&gt;Our leaves touch in the clouds.&lt;br /&gt;As a gust of wind passes by&lt;br /&gt;We salute each other&lt;br /&gt;And not a soul&lt;br /&gt;Understands our language.&lt;br /&gt;You have your bronze boughs and iron trunk&lt;br /&gt;Like knives and swords,&lt;br /&gt;Also like halberds;&lt;br /&gt;I have my red flowers&lt;br /&gt;Like heavy sighs,&lt;br /&gt;Also like heroic torches.&lt;br /&gt;We share cold waves, storms and thunderbolts;&lt;br /&gt;Together we savor fog, haze and rainbows.&lt;br /&gt;We seem to always live apart,&lt;br /&gt;But actually depend upon each other forever.&lt;br /&gt;This has to be called extraordinary love.&lt;br /&gt;Faith resides in it:&lt;br /&gt;Love—&lt;br /&gt;I love not only your sublime body&lt;br /&gt;But the space you occupy,&lt;br /&gt;The land beneath your feet.
** &quot;To the Oak Tree&quot; [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APZjf9K6KX0 致橡树], ''Zhi xiangshu''] (27 March 1977), in ''The Red Azalea: Chinese Poetry Since the Cultural Revolution'', ed. Edward Morin, trans. Fang Dai and Dennis Ding (University of Hawaii Press, 1990), {{ISBN|978-0824813208}}, pp. 102–103&lt;!--; quoted in full in ''The paths that lead nowhere: Chinese misty poetry and modernity'' (Stanford University, 1996) by Kwai-Cheung Lo, pp. 161–162--&gt;.

* A colorful hanging chart with no lines.&lt;br /&gt;A pure algebra problem with no solution.
** &quot;Missing You&quot; (1978), in ''Out of the Howling Storm: The New Chinese Poetry'', ed. Tony Barnstone (Wesleyan University Press, 1993), p. 61

* Remember the storm, the lighthouse&lt;br /&gt;That brought us together&lt;br /&gt;Another storm, a different light&lt;br /&gt;Drove us asunder again&lt;br /&gt;Even though morning or evening&lt;br /&gt;Sky and ocean stand between us&lt;br /&gt;You are always on my voyage&lt;br /&gt;I am always in your sight
** &quot;Two-Masted Ship&quot; (27 August 1979), in ''The Red Azalea: Chinese Poetry Since the Cultural Revolution'', ed. Edward Morin (University of Hawaii Press, 1990), p. 101

* 与其在悬崖上展览千年&lt;br /&gt;不如在爱人肩头痛哭一晚
** Instead of being on display on the cliff for a thousand years&lt;br /&gt;I'd rather have a hearty cry on my lover's shoulder for a single night.
** &quot;Goddess Peak&quot; [神女峰, ''Shennü feng''], in ''The Cambridge History of Chinese Literature, Volume II: From 1375'' (Cambridge University Press, 2010), p. 649

== Quotes about Shu Ting ==
* Her voice is distinctly feminine, but not feminist. In the decade after the Cultural Revolution, when China was struggling to recover from ten years of trauma, Shu Ting's gentle poetic voice and her faith in the human spirit drew a remarkably large following.
** Eva Hung, ''Shu Ting: Selected Poems'' (Renditions, 1994), p. 8, as quoted in ''Twentieth-Century Chinese Women's Poetry: An Anthology'' (Routledge, 2015) by Julia C. Lin, p. 59.

== External links ==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Shu, Ting}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Misty poets]]</text>
      <sha1>8pvy7puni9n4ctb3d92ieif9nsjhtea</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965273</id>
      <parentid>3965272</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:43:08Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3965273</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4556" sha1="ejlxsigl8pss3vuhwizng8x6x0fban9" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Spitze-der-Goettin.jpg|thumb|Instead of being on display on the cliff for a thousand years&lt;br /&gt;I'd rather have a hearty cry on my lover's shoulder for a single night.]]

'''[[w:Shu Ting|Shu Ting]]''' ([[Chinese language|Chinese]]: 舒婷; [[w:Pinyin|pinyin]]: ''Shū Tíng''; born 1952) is the pen name of '''Gong Peiyu''' (Chinese: 龚佩瑜; pinyin: ''Gōng Pèiyú''), a [[Chinese poet]] associated with the [[w:Misty Poets|Misty Poets]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Bombax ceiba tree'.jpg|thumb|I would be a kapok tree by your side&lt;br /&gt;Standing with you—&lt;br /&gt;both of us shaped like trees.]]
[[File:Quercus variabilis JPG1a.JPG|thumb|You have your bronze boughs and iron trunk&lt;br /&gt;Like knives and swords]]
[[File:Semal (Bombax ceiba) flowers in Kolkata W IMG 4132.jpg|thumb|I have my red flowers&lt;br /&gt;Like heavy sighs,&lt;br /&gt;Also like heroic torches.]]
[[File:Supernumerary rainbow 01 contrast.jpg|thumb|We share cold waves, storms and thunderbolts;&lt;br /&gt;Together we savor fog, haze and rainbows.&lt;br /&gt;We seem to always live apart,&lt;br /&gt;But actually depend upon each other forever.]]

* If I love you—&lt;br /&gt;I never behave like a climbing trumpet vine&lt;br /&gt;Using your high branches to show myself off;&lt;br /&gt;If I love you—&lt;br /&gt;I never mimic infatuated little birds&lt;br /&gt;Repeating monotonous songs into the shadows,&lt;br /&gt;Nor do I look at all like a wellspring&lt;br /&gt;Sending out its cooling consolation all year round,&lt;br /&gt;Or just another perilous crag&lt;br /&gt;Augmenting your height, setting off your prestige.&lt;br /&gt;Nor like the sunlight&lt;br /&gt;Or even spring rain.&lt;br /&gt;No, these are not enough.&lt;br /&gt;I would be a kapok tree by your side&lt;br /&gt;Standing with you—&lt;br /&gt;both of us shaped like trees.&lt;br /&gt;Our roots hold hands underground,&lt;br /&gt;Our leaves touch in the clouds.&lt;br /&gt;As a gust of wind passes by&lt;br /&gt;We salute each other&lt;br /&gt;And not a soul&lt;br /&gt;Understands our language.&lt;br /&gt;You have your bronze boughs and iron trunk&lt;br /&gt;Like knives and swords,&lt;br /&gt;Also like halberds;&lt;br /&gt;I have my red flowers&lt;br /&gt;Like heavy sighs,&lt;br /&gt;Also like heroic torches.&lt;br /&gt;We share cold waves, storms and thunderbolts;&lt;br /&gt;Together we savor fog, haze and rainbows.&lt;br /&gt;We seem to always live apart,&lt;br /&gt;But actually depend upon each other forever.&lt;br /&gt;This has to be called extraordinary love.&lt;br /&gt;Faith resides in it:&lt;br /&gt;Love—&lt;br /&gt;I love not only your sublime body&lt;br /&gt;But the space you occupy,&lt;br /&gt;The land beneath your feet.
** &quot;To the Oak Tree&quot; [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APZjf9K6KX0 致橡树], ''Zhi xiangshu''] (27 March 1977), in ''The Red Azalea: Chinese Poetry Since the Cultural Revolution'', ed. Edward Morin, trans. Fang Dai and Dennis Ding (University of Hawaii Press, 1990), {{ISBN|978-0824813208}}, pp. 102–103&lt;!--; quoted in full in ''The paths that lead nowhere: Chinese misty poetry and modernity'' (Stanford University, 1996) by Kwai-Cheung Lo, pp. 161–162--&gt;.

* A colorful hanging chart with no lines.&lt;br /&gt;A pure algebra problem with no solution.
** &quot;Missing You&quot; (1978), in ''Out of the Howling Storm: The New Chinese Poetry'', ed. Tony Barnstone (Wesleyan University Press, 1993), p. 61

* Remember the storm, the lighthouse&lt;br /&gt;That brought us together&lt;br /&gt;Another storm, a different light&lt;br /&gt;Drove us asunder again&lt;br /&gt;Even though morning or evening&lt;br /&gt;Sky and ocean stand between us&lt;br /&gt;You are always on my voyage&lt;br /&gt;I am always in your sight
** &quot;Two-Masted Ship&quot; (27 August 1979), in ''The Red Azalea: Chinese Poetry Since the Cultural Revolution'', ed. Edward Morin (University of Hawaii Press, 1990), p. 101

* 与其在悬崖上展览千年&lt;br /&gt;不如在爱人肩头痛哭一晚
** Instead of being on display on the cliff for a thousand years&lt;br /&gt;I'd rather have a hearty cry on my lover's shoulder for a single night.
*** &quot;Goddess Peak&quot; [神女峰, ''Shennü feng''], in ''The Cambridge History of Chinese Literature, Volume II: From 1375'' (Cambridge University Press, 2010), p. 649

== Quotes about Shu Ting ==
* Her voice is distinctly feminine, but not feminist. In the decade after the Cultural Revolution, when China was struggling to recover from ten years of trauma, Shu Ting's gentle poetic voice and her faith in the human spirit drew a remarkably large following.
** Eva Hung, ''Shu Ting: Selected Poems'' (Renditions, 1994), p. 8, as quoted in ''Twentieth-Century Chinese Women's Poetry: An Anthology'' (Routledge, 2015) by Julia C. Lin, p. 59.

== External links ==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Shu, Ting}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Misty poets]]</text>
      <sha1>ejlxsigl8pss3vuhwizng8x6x0fban9</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Justice League (film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>199547</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965004</id>
      <parentid>3954827</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:57:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>NetflixExpirationTradition</username>
        <id>3297184</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965004</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="27213" sha1="p5li4ll1yp4g7cg6jj1hqblx57sv27c" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Justice League (film)|Justice League]]''''' is a 2017 American superhero film based on the DC Comics superhero team of [[Justice League|the same name]], distributed by Warner Bros. Pictures. It is the fifth installment in the [[w:DC Extended Universe|DC Extended Universe]]. In May 2020, [[Zack Snyder]] announced that his cut would release on [[w:HBO Max|HBO Max]] as ''[[Zack Snyder's Justice League]]'' in 2021.

:''Directed by [[Zack Snyder]]. Written by [[w:Chris Terrio|Chris Terrio]] and [[Joss Whedon]], based on the DC Comics superhero team of [[w:Justice League|the same name]].''

{{film-stub}}
== [[Batman|Bruce Wayne / Batman]] ==
* I think it's something more. Something darker.
* Arthur Curry. Also known as Protector of the Oceans. The Aquaman. I hear you can talk to fish.
* Superman was a beacon to the world. Why aren't you? You're an inspiration, Diana. You don't just save people. You make them see their better selves.
* He was more human than I am. He lived in this world. Fell in love, got a job, despite all that power. The world needs Superman. And the team needs Clark.
* ''[blasting Parademons with the Knightcrawler's weapons]'' Sorry, guys. I didn't bring a sword.
* ''[blasting Parademons with the Knightcrawler's weapons, in the Snyder Cut only]'' My turn.
* ''[as Steppenwolf leaps onto the Nightcrawler]'' Jesus... he ''is'' tall.

== [[Superman|Clark Kent / Superman]] ==
* ''[to kids filming him]'' My f&amp;ndash; a man I knew used to say that hope is like your car keys. Easy to lose, but if you dig around, it's usually close by.
* ''[while choking Batman]'' [[Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice|Tell me&amp;ndash; do you bleed?]]
* ''[to Steppenwolf]'' Well&amp;ndash; I believe in truth&amp;ndash; but I'm also a big fan of justice.
* ''[to Flash]'' Slowpoke.

== [[w:Lois Lane|Lois Lane]] ==
* ''[writing a story for the Daily Planet]'' Darkness, the truest darkness, is not the absence of light. It is the conviction that the light will never return. But the light always returns to show us things familiar, Home, family, and things entirely new, or long overlooked. It shows us new possibilities and challenges us to pursue them. this time, the light shone on the heroes coming out of the shadows to tell us we won't be alone again. Our darkness was deep and soon to swallow all hope. But these heroes were here the whole time to remind us that hope is real. That you can see it. All you have to do is look, up in the sky.

==  [[Wonder Woman|Diana Prince / Wonder Woman]] ==
* You should move on from mourning for your parents.
* We're asking people we don’t know to risk their lives.
* You were pushing me to lead the team&amp;ndash; but leaders get people killed. I fought, always, when I was needed. But to lead, to step into the light, and to say to people &quot;This is worth your life.&quot; When it's your fault&amp;ndash; they're all Steve Trevor.
* Children. I work with children.
* ''[seeing Superman preparing his attack on the Justice League]'' Kal-El, no!

== [[The Flash|Barry Allen / The Flash]] ==
* ''[to a little girl]'' Dostoevsky.
* ''[scarfing a whole pizza]'' It's like this layer of dimensional reality that seems to manipulate space-time. I call it the [[w:Speed Force|Speed Force]]. It causes me to burn a tremendous amount of calories, so I am just a black hole of snacks. I am a snack hole.
* ''[sees the Bat signal shining in the sky]'' Oh, awesome. That’s the Bat signal, that’s your… Ooh, ssh. Sorry. That’s your signal, that means we have to go now.
* ''[seeing Superman alive again but has not regained his memories]'' Pet Semetary! 
* ''[after Cyborg flies away to retrieve the Mother Box]'' Did he just bail?
* ''[after he defeated the robot bugs]'' Yes! That was gross!

== [[w:Aquaman|Arthur Curry / Aquaman]] ==
* ''[rescues a man from drowning; takes a bottle of whisky]'' It's on him.
* This is crazy. Honestly, I think we’re all going to die. 
* ''[to Flash]'' You say a word about this, and you'll meet every piranha I know.

== [[w:Cyborg (comics)|Victor Stone / Cyborg]] ==
* You know, ever since we got visitors from Krypton, people have been waiting for the next alien invasion. Now I gotta wonder if I'm it.
* Booyah.

== [[w:Alfred Pennyworth|Alfred Pennyworth]] ==
* ''[to Bruce]'' One misses the days when ones biggest concerns were exploding wind-up penguins.
* ''[to Bruce]'' I don't recognize this world.

== [[w:Steppenwolf (comics)|Steppenwolf]] ==
* The Kryptonian's death plunged this timid world into such terrors. Amazons, Atlanteans, each stands and falls alone.
* And my exile will come to an end. I will take my place among the [[w:New Gods|New Gods]].
* ''[to his Parademons]'' Find the last one. Its power will cleanse this world. For the Unity! For [[w:Darkseid|Darkseid]].
* ''[to Hippolyta]'' Noble queen, why do you fight? After the Unity, you will join my legion, and you will know the righteousness of power. ''[Hippolyta fires an arrow at him, but he easily swats it away]'' You will love me. ''[turns around and sees all Amazons charging towards him]'' You all will. ''[teleports away with the Mother Box]''
* ''[in a deleted scene]'' No protectors here. No [[w:Green Lantern Corps|Lanterns]]. No Kryptonian. This world will fall like all the others.
* ''[Superman arrives in the final battle]'' Kryptonian!
* I am the end of worlds! Who are you to defy me?! This world is my right!
* ''[to the Justice League, while being attacked by the Parademons]'' I'll kill you! I'll kill you all!

== Dialogue ==
:'''[[w:Steppenwolf (comics)|Steppenwolf]]''': [[w:Mother Box|Mother]], millennia in exile, searching... at last you call me home.
:'''[[w:Hippolyta (comics)|Hippolyta]]''': You will ''not'' like your welcome!
:'''Steppenwolf''': ''[smiles]'' Oh, I think I will.

----
:'''[[Batman|Bruce Wayne]]''': There is a stranger who comes to this village from the sea. He comes in the winter when people are hungry, he brings fish, comes on the king tide. That was last night.
:'''[[w:Aquaman|Arthur Curry]]''': Talk.
:'''Bruce''': I believe that an enemy is coming from far away. I’m looking for warriors. This stranger, others like him. I’m building an alliance to defend us. It’s very important that I see this man.

----
:'''Bruce''': What is it? Mankind's melting the polar ice caps, destroying the ecosystem, they got it coming?
:'''Arthur''': Hey, I don't mind if the ocean dries.
:'''Bruce''': How 'bout if they boil?
:'''Arthur''': Dressed like a bat. You're outta your mind, Bruce Wayne. ''[dives and swims off]''
:'''Bruce''': Doesn't mean I'm wrong.

----
:'''Victor Stone''': Does anybody know?
:'''Silas Stone''': What?
:'''Victor Stone''': At the lab. Does anybody know I'm alive?
:'''Silas Stone''': Uh... I- I... I didn't think you were ready for them to...
:'''Victor Stone''': For what? For them to see the monster.
:'''Silas Stone''': You are not a monster.
:'''Victor Stone''': It's weird that you thought I meant me. 

----
:''[Barry is queuing at the prison parlor]''
:'''[[w:The Flash (Barry Allen)|Barry Allen]]''': ''[gives the prison guard his ID card]'' Here to see Henry Allen.
:'''Prison guard''': ''[takes Barry's ID card from him]'' Sign.
:''[Barry picks up a sharpie and uses it to sign a sign-in form]''
:'''Man''': Hurry it up, will you? ''[Barry turns around]'' What, you got a problem?
:'''Barry Allen''': ''[uses his super speed to draw glasses, a mustache, and a surgical staple line on the man's face]'' No, there's no problem.
:'''Man''': Hmph. Better not be.
:''[Barry turns back to the form. He writes down the initials &quot;B.A.&quot; on it]''
:'''Prison guard''': You know where to go.
:''[as Barry goes to talk to his father, the prison guard looks at the form, then secretly uses his phone to send out a notification]''
:'''Prison guard''': ''[to the man, whose face has a drawn glasses, mustache, and surgical staple line]'' Are those prescription? Or are you just trying to look brainy?
:''[the man figures out that Barry drew glasses, a mustache, and a surgical line on his face]''

----
:''[Barry is talking to his father]''
:'''Henry''': Because you're holding yourself back. You're going in circles. You're working three dead-end jobs, going on four. Where do you even have the time?
:'''Barry''': I make the time.
:'''Henry''': And this is all to pay for a criminal justice degree, huh?
:'''Barry''': Okay, I really don't wanna talk about this again. The investigation was botched.
:'''Henry''': ''[puts his hand on the glass]'' Give me your hand, man. ''[Barry puts his hand on the glass]'' I want you to listen to me, Barry, because I mean this. I want you to give all that up. And I want you to stop coming to see me. I am a drag on your life.
:'''Barry''': Please don't ever say that to me again. Please?
:'''Henry''': You can be whatever you wanna be. You're brilliant, man. Absolute best of the best. I can't sit here and watch you run in place in Central City for some old dude who's not going anywhere.
:'''Barry''': Dad, that's not true.
:'''Prison guard''': It's time.
:'''Barry''': That's not true.
:'''Prison guard''': Let's go, Allen. Allen!
:'''Henry''': I want you to make your own future. ''[the prison guard grabs him and pulls him up]'' You're living in the past. Make your own future. ''[hangs up the phone and waves to his son]''
:'''Prison guard''': Open gate!
:''[as the prison guard leads Henry away, Barry hangs up the phone and starts thinking about making his own future]''

----
:'''Diana Prince''': They called him Steppenwolf, the end of worlds. He lived only to conquer. Millions fell before his blade, or rose again as his Parademons. Nightmare creatures who feed on fear.
:'''Bruce Wayne''': Yeah, I think I met one. We didn't hit it Off. 
:'''Diana Prince''': Here in Gotham?
:'''Bruce Wayne''': They're all over. They're looking for his… boxes?
:'''Diana Prince''': The Mother Boxes.
:'''Bruce Wayne''': Mother Boxes. I guess Steppenwolf took the one your people were guarding. That leaves two more.
:'''Diana Prince''': I'm impressed.
:'''Bruce Wayne''': Don't be. I have no idea what's in them. A weapon? Some kind of power?
:'''Diana Prince''': They don't contain power. They ARE power. Carried from planet to planet, the Mother Boxes combine to form the unity. An apocalyptic power that not only destroys worlds, but transforms them into the primordial hellscape of Steppenwolf's birth world. We should have died. But we formed our own unity. Amazons, Atlanteans, all the tribes of men fought side by side. Warriors of legend, allies from other worlds, even the gods themselves all acted as one. Laying down their lives to drive Steppenwolf away. Some say it drove him mad. The disgrace of his first retreat. He swore our alliance would crumble. That darkness would cover the Earth. And that he would return when it did. Left behind, the Mother Boxes were too dangerous to be kept together. One was entrusted to the Amazons. One to the Atlanteans. Both sealed and guarded in secure strongholds. The Box of Men was buried in secret so that no tribe would be tempted to use its power over another. Such harmony out of such horror. It was truly an Age of Heroes.
:'''Bruce Wayne''': Something tells me we're not getting the band back together.
:'''Diana Prince''': The Atlanteans were forced undersea, and the Amazons to an island they can never leave.
:'''Bruce Wayne''': Well, I wouldn't count on the tribes of men. We tend to act like the Doomsday Clock has a snooze button. How long until--
:'''Diana Prince''': --Days. At most. Steppenwolf's mistake last time was attacking us. He wanted to make the Earth kneel before he destroyed us.

----
:'''Arthur''': [[Friedrich Schiller|Strong man is strongest alone]]. Have you ever heard that?
:'''Bruce''': That’s not the saying. That’s the opposite of what the saying is.
:'''Arthur''': ''[takes off his coat]'' Doesn't mean I'm wrong.

----
:''[Barry pushes up the switch in the power box that turns on the power]''
:'''Bruce''': ''[sitting on a chair]'' Barry Allen. Bruce Wayne.
:'''Barry''': You said that like it explains why there’s a total stranger in my place sitting in the dark in my second favorite chair.
:'''Bruce''': ''[hands Barry a surveillance camera photo of Barry]'' Tell me about this.
:'''Barry''': ''[takes it and pretends to study it]'' This is a person who looks exactly like me, but who is definitely ''not'' me. Very attractive Jewish boy.
:''[Bruce approaches the Flash suit]''
:'''Barry''': Somebody who, I don't know, stole your pocket watch? Or railroads?
:'''Bruce'''': I know you have abilities. I just don't know what they are.
:'''Barry''': My special skills include, uh, viola, uh, web design, fluent in sign language. Gorilla sign language.
:'''Bruce''': ''[sees the Flash suit]'' Silica-based quartz sand fabric. Abrasion resistant. Heat resistant.
:'''Barry''': Uh, yeah, I do&amp;ndash; competitive ice dancing.
:'''Bruce''': It's what they use on the space shuttle to prevent it from burning up on re-entry.
:'''Barry''': I do&amp;ndash; ''very'' competitive ice dancing. Whoever you're looking for, it's not&amp;ndash;
:''[Bruce suddenly throws a Batarang straight at Barry, who uses his super-speed to step out of the way. As he glances at the Batarang, he looks at Bruce in shock, then catches it]''
:'''Barry''': You're the ''Batman''?
:'''Bruce''': So, you're fast.
:'''Barry''': That feels like an oversimplification.
:'''Bruce''': I'm putting together a team. People with special abilities. You see, I believe enemies are coming.
:'''Barry''': ''[grins]'' Stop right there. I'm in.
:'''Bruce''': ''[surprised]'' You are?
:'''Barry''': Yeah, I&amp;ndash; I need&amp;ndash; friends. People are difficult, they require a lot of focus. They, uh&amp;ndash; they have a rhythm that I haven't quite been able to&amp;ndash; like brunch! Like, what is brunch? You wait in line for an hour for, essentially, lunch. I mean&amp;ndash; I don't know. People are&amp;ndash; a little slow.
:'''Bruce''': I'll try to keep up.
:'''Barry''': ''[holds up the Batarang]'' Can I keep this?

----
:''[Bruce and Barry, who is carrying a pizza box, go to Bruce's car]''
:'''Barry''': It's like this layer of dimensional reality, and it seems to manipulate space-time. I call it the Speed Force. Causes me to burn a tremendous amount of calories. So I'm just a black hole of snacks. I am a &quot;snack&quot; hole. How many people are on this special fight team?
:'''Bruce''': Three, including you.
:'''Barry''': Three? Against what?
:'''Bruce''': I'll tell you on the plane.
:'''Barry''': The plane?
:''[Bruce and Barry get into the car]''
:'''Barry''': What are your superpowers again?
:'''Bruce''': I'm rich.
:''[Bruce starts the engine of the car. He and Barry drive off]''

----
:''[Mera creates a bubble around herself and Arthur]''
:'''Arthur''': You took a hell of a hit. You all right?
:'''[[w:Mera (DC Extended Universe)|Mera]]''': ''[chuckles]'' At last. The firstborn of the beloved Queen Atlanna.
:''[Arthur starts to leave]''
:'''Mera''': ''[stops Arthur from leaving]'' Wait! Please. I knew her.
:'''Arthur''': Well, that makes one of us.
:'''Mera''': When my parents fought in the wars&amp;ndash; she took me in.
:'''Arthur''': What a saint.
:'''Mera''': You dare speak of Queen Atlanna that way?
:'''Arthur''': Your queen left me on my father's doorstep and never gave me another thought.
:'''Mera''': Your mother left you to save your life. Cannot imagine how it hurt her. What it cost her. But you're not a defenseless child now. It would have been her responsibility to follow that monster to the surface and stop him. Now&amp;ndash; it's yours.
:'''Arthur''': Then I'm gonna need something from you.

----
:'''[[w:James Gordon (comics)|Commissioner James Gordon]]''': How many of you are there?
:'''Batman''': Not enough.
:'''Commissioner James Gordon''': 8 people abducted from or near STAR Labs. ''[shows a drawing of a Parademon]'' Here's our potential perp.
:'''Wonder Woman''': Parademons.
:'''Flash''': ''[shocked]'' Okay...
:'''Wonder Woman''': The demons must've caught the scent of the Mother Box. They carried people away to find out what they know.
:'''Batman''': So the 8 may still be alive.
:'''Cyborg''': [[9 (2009 animated film)|9]]. ''[everyone turns around]'' The head of STAR Labs was taken as well.
:'''Wonder Woman''': ''[smiles]'' You made it. ''[Cyborg smiles back]''
:'''Commissioner James Gordon''': So then there must be a nest nearby. I plotted all the sightings in Metropolis, Gotham. No pattern I can see. The lines on the map don't converge.
:'''Cyborg''': ''[looks at the map]'' On land. These lead back to Braxton Island between the 2 cities.
:'''Batman''': Gotham Harbor. These are air vents. They all lead down to the tunnel for Metropolis Project that was abandoned in '29.
:'''Commissioner James Gordon''': Do you really think that&amp;ndash; ''[he turns around to see only the Flash standing behind him, the others have disappeared]''
:'''Flash''': Oh, wow, they just, they really just vanished. Huh? Oh. That's rude. ''[speeds off]''

----
:'''Steppenwolf''': Just tell me the truth.
:'''1st Scientist''': Please, please just let us go! I have a family&amp;ndash;!
:'''Steppenwolf''': [[Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2|Wrong answer.]] ''[kills her]'' Humans, the stench of your fear is making my soldiers hungry. ''[grabs a second scientist]'' Shall I feed them? You've been near the Mother Box. Her scent is on you.
:'''2nd Scientist''': Please, we have families! Please&amp;ndash;
:'''Steppenwolf''': Why does everyone keep telling me that?

----
:'''Flash''': ''[dry-heaving]'' Here's the thing. See, I'm afraid of bugs, and guns, and obnoxiously tall people, and ''murder''. I can't be here! It's really cool, you guys seem ready to do battle and stuff, but, full transparency, I've never done battle. I've just pushed some people and run away!
:'''Batman''': Save one. 
:'''Flash''': What? 
:'''Batman''': Save one person. 
:'''Flash''': Uh&amp;ndash; which one?
:'''Batman''': Don't talk, don't fight. Get in, get one out.
:'''Flash''': And&amp;ndash; and then? 
:'''Batman''': You'll know.
:'''Flash''': Okay.

----
:'''Steppenwolf''': ''[throws a scientist into the wall]'' Useless! ''[picks up Silas Stone]'' You, then. Where is my Mother Box?!
:'''Silas Stone''': I'll die before I tell you.
:'''Steppenwolf''': At last, one that doesn't whine. But you ''will'' scream.

----
:'''Steppenwolf''': ''[sees Cyborg]'' Ah&amp;ndash; you were born of her. A creature of chaos.
:'''Cyborg''': Not how I see it.
:'''Steppenwolf''': Give it time.

----
:''[Wonder Woman confronts Steppenwolf]''
:'''Steppenwolf''': This one is mine!
:''[his Parademons withdraw]''
:'''Diana''': You overestimate yourself.
:'''Steppenwolf''': Child, my ax is still slick with the blood of your sisters.
:''[Diana roars and attacks]''

----
:'''[[w:Cyborg (comics)|Cyborg]]''': ''[takes control of the Knightcrawler]'' Thanks, Alfred. But I’ll take it from here.
:'''[[w:Alfred Pennyworth|Alfred]]''': Uh, do I know you?

----
:''[the Knightcrawler fires two missiles at Steppenwolf. He deflects one and catches the other]''
:'''Steppenwolf''': Primitive beings.
:''[he releases the missile to explode against the ceiling]''
:'''Flash''': What are we under right now?
:''[ominous rumbling]''
:'''Batman''': Gotham Harbor.

----
:'''[[w:Commissioner Gordon|James Gordon]]''': Nice to see you playing well with others.
:'''Aquaman''': Dressed like a bat&amp;ndash; I dig it.
:'''Batman''': ''[through gritted teeth]'' May be temporary.

----
:'''Bruce''': And that's what science is for: to do what's never been done. To make life better.
:'''Diana''': Or to end it. Technology is like any other power. Without reason, without heart, it destroys us.

----
:'''[[w:Lois Lane|Lois Lane]]''': I was hoping it was gonna take you longer to recover.
:'''Clark''': Why?
:'''Lois''': Because now I have to send you away.
:'''Clark''': Bruce.
:'''Lois''': He needs you. Fate of the world. I think that's the deal. He was pretty tense.
:'''Clark''': Well, I guess I do owe him one.

----
:'''Aquaman''': Honestly, I think we're gonna be dead way before that. And you know what? I don't mind. It's an honorable end. But we've gotta shut Steppenwolf down. Superman's a no-show. ''[looks at Batman]'' You've got no powers, no offense. ''[looks at Cyborg]'' This guy might be working for the enemy. We don't know. ''[looks at Flash]'' You're tripping over your feet, and mine&amp;ndash; ''[looks at Wonder Woman]'' Whuf, you're gorgeous, and fierce&amp;ndash; and strong. ''[everyone is surprised]'' I know we went to war with the Amazons, but that was before my time. You know what? I don't wanna die. I'm young. There's shit that I wanna do. I just feel like&amp;ndash; I didn't really embrace the sea or the land. I've been a loner my whole life. But being part of something bigger, like this&amp;ndash; maybe I'm scared because&amp;ndash; I'm meant to&amp;ndash; 
:''[Batman gestures to Aquaman, who realizes he sat on Wonder Woman's Lasso of Hestia. He angrily tosses it back to her]''
:'''Wonder Woman''': I think that was beautiful. 
:'''Aquaman''': ''[to Flash]'' You say a word about this, and you'll meet every piranha I know. 
:'''Flash''': I honestly didn't hear anything after &quot;We're all gonna die.&quot;.

----
:'''Aquaman''': So your genius move is dying? You really are out of your mind.
:'''Batman''': I'm not the one who brought a pitchfork.

----
:'''Superman''': So how do I help?
:'''Batman''': ''[indicates Victor]'' We buy him some time, he can stop that box from destroying all life on Earth&amp;ndash; we hope.
:'''Superman''': Well, I knew you didn't bring me back 'cause you like me.
:'''Batman''': ''[awkwardly]'' I don't&amp;ndash; not&amp;ndash;

----
:'''Superman''': ''[flying alongside Flash]'' Slowpoke.
:'''The Flash''': Oh, it's on!

----
:'''Cyborg''': Superman! We gotta pull these things apart. A couple more seconds, you'll see your opening.
:'''Superman''': Any blowback?
:'''Cyborg''': Big time. But I think we can take it.
:'''Superman''': Good. 'Cause I really like being alive.
:'''Cyborg''': So do I.

----
:''[after the Mother Boxes explode]''
:'''Batman''': Clark.
:''[the smoke clears, revealing Superman and Cyborg knocked flat]''
:'''Superman''': I take it back. I wanna die.
:''[they laugh weakly]''
:'''Cyborg''': Man, my toes hurt! I don't even understand the physics of how my toes can hurt!
:''[they laugh louder]''
:'''Wonder Woman''': Children. I work with children.

----
:''[after Superman uses his arctic breath to freeze Steppenwolf's axe and Wonder Woman uses her sword to destroy it]''
:'''Steppenwolf''': No! This cannot be!
:'''Aquaman''': You recognize that smell?
:''[all the Parademons turn to Steppenwolf]''
:'''Batman''': Fear.
:''[all the Parademons fly toward Steppenwolf]''
:'''Steppenwolf''': No! Leave me! ''[the Parademons swarm over him]'' Get off me! I command you! ''[the Parademons pile on him]'' I'll kill you! I'll kill you all!
:''[the Parademons carry him away]''
:'''Cyborg''': Booyah. 
----
:'''Superman''': ''[seeing plant-life growing]'' I'm glad I didn't miss this.
:'''Wonder Woman''': So am I.
:'''Batman''': Yeah, ''Now'' she's glad.

----
:''[watching movers returning the Kent family's furniture to their farmhouse, supervised by Martha and Lois]''
:'''Clark''': &quot;Thank you&quot; is&amp;ndash; not enough for what you did.
:'''Bruce''': I just undid a mistake, that's all.
:'''Clark''': How did you get the house back from the bank?
:'''Bruce''': I bought the bank.
:'''Clark''': ''[gives Bruce a look]'' The whole bank?
:'''Bruce''': It's like a reflex with me, I don't know.

----
:''[in a mid-credits scene, Superman and Flash are about to have a friendly race]'' 
:'''Superman''': If I win, Bruce said something about you having to take us all to brunch?
:'''Flash''': Oh see, now that's cold, that's a betrayal. I feel stung by that&amp;ndash; Okay, but if I win I get to tell everyone.
:'''Superman''': Deal.
:''[Superman and Flash shake hands]''
:'''Superman''': Which coast?
:'''Flash''': You know, I've never seen the [[w:Pacific Ocean|Pacific]]. ''[points eastward; Superman points westward to correct him]'' Which is that way. Because&amp;ndash; the sun, and it's&amp;ndash;
:''[they get on their marks as Flash lights up small firecracker and tosses it in the ground. Immediately after it blows up, they speed up for their race]''

----
:''[in a post-credits scene, after it was revealed Lex Luthor escaped from prison, a motor boat drives up to his private yacht. Deathstroke steps out to speak with Luthor]'' 
:'''Lex Luthor''': Ah. There he is, welcome aboard. Care for a glass of Goutte de Diamant? I was just celebrating God's return. Out of the ground and back up into the sky. He and his odd little friends are forming some sort of... League.
:'''Deathstroke''': You better not be wasting my time.
:'''Lex Luthor''': No, I have too much to live for. And more important things to do. ''[Deathstroke removes his helmet]'' We have to level the playing field, Mr. Wilson. To put it plainly... shouldn't we have [[w:Legion of Doom|a League of our own]]?

== Cast ==
* [[Ben Affleck]] as [[Batman|Bruce Wayne / Batman]]
* [[Henry Cavill]] as [[Superman|Kal-El / Clark Kent / Superman]]
* [[Amy Adams]] as [[w:Lois Lane|Lois Lane]]
* [[Gal Gadot]] as [[w:Wonder Woman|Diana Prince / Wonder Woman]]
* [[Ezra Miller]] as [[w:Flash (Barry Allen)|Barry Allen / The Flash]]
* [[Jason Momoa]] as [[w:Aquaman|Arthur Curry / Aquaman]]
* [[w:Ray Fisher (actor)|Ray Fisher]] as [[w:Cyborg (comics)|Victor Stone / Cyborg]]
* [[Jeremy Irons]] as [[w:Alfred Pennyworth|Alfred Pennyworth]]
* [[w:Diane Lane|Diane Lane]] as [[w:Jonathan and Martha Kent|Martha Kent]]
* [[w:Connie Nielsen|Connie Nielsen]] as [[w:Hippolyta (comics)|Queen Hippolyta]]
* [[w:J.K. Simmons|J.K. Simmons]] as [[w:James Gordon (comics)|James Gordon]]
* [[w:Ciarán Hinds|Ciarán Hinds]] as [[w:Steppenwolf (comics)|Steppenwolf]]
* [[Amber Heard]] as [[w:Mera (comics)|Mera]]

== Taglines ==
* You can't save the world alone.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commonscat}}
* {{Official website|http://justiceleaguethemovie.com/}}
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9-DM9uBtVI Heroes trailer (8 October 2017)]
* {{IMDb title|0974015|Justice League}}
* [https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/justice_league_2017/ ''Wonder Woman'' at Rotten Tomatoes]
* {{Mojo title|justiceleague|Justice League}}
* {{Metacritic film|justice-league|Justice League}}

{{Batman}}
{{Authority control}}

{{DC Comics live-action films}}

[[Category:2017 films]]
[[Category:Action films]]
[[Category:Adventure films]]
[[Category:Comic book films]]
[[Category:DC Extended Universe]]
[[Category:Justice League films]]
[[Category:Batman films]]
[[Category:Superman films]]
[[Category:Wonder Woman films]]
[[Category:Epic films]]
[[Category:Fantasy films]]
[[Category:Films set in London]]
[[Category:Films set in Russia]]
[[Category:Films set in the United States]]
[[Category:Films with gods]]
[[Category:Science fiction films]]
[[Category:Screenplays by Chris Terrio]]
[[Category:Screenplays by Joss Whedon]]
[[Category:Superhero crossover films]]
[[Category:Apocalyptic films]]
[[Category:Films set in a fictional country]]
[[Category:Films directed by Zack Snyder]]
[[Category:Films about alien invasions]]</text>
      <sha1>p5li4ll1yp4g7cg6jj1hqblx57sv27c</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Coco (2017 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>199548</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965249</id>
      <parentid>3952225</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:11:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965249</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="48831" sha1="tl49apf5iwzjwj9exdkz5cgl7m4pren" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Coco (2017 film)|Coco]]''''' is a [[w:2017 in film|2017]] American 3D computer-animated musical fantasy comedy-drama adventure film produced by [[w:Pixar Animation Studios|Pixar Animation Studios]] and released by [[w: Walt Disney Pictures|Walt Disney Pictures]]. It tells a story about a 12-year-old boy named Miguel (voiced by [[w:Anthony Gonzalez (actor)|Anthony Gonzalez]]) who is accidentally transported to the Land of the Dead, where he seeks the help of his deceased musician great-great-grandfather to return him to his family among the living and to reverse his family's ban on music.

:''Directed by [[w:Lee Unkrich|Lee Unkrich]]. Co-Directed by [[w:Adrian Molina|Adrian Molina]]. Screenplay by Adrian Molina and Matthew Aldrich. Story by Lee Unkrich, Jason Katz, Matthew Aldrich and Adrian Molina. Songs by [[w:Kristen Anderson-Lopez|Kristen Anderson-Lopez]], [[w:Robert Lopez|Robert Lopez]], [[w:Germaine Franco|Germaine Franco]] and Adrian Molina. Score by [[w:Michael Giacchino|Michael Giacchino]].''
{{center|'''The celebration of a lifetime.'''([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

== Miguel ==
* ''[first lines; narrating]'' Sometimes, I think I'm cursed. Because of something that happened before I was even born. See, a long time ago, there was this family. The papá, he was a musician. He and his family would sing and dance and count their blessings. But he also had a dream, to play for the world. And one day, he left with his guitar and ''never'' returned. And the mamá… She didn't have time to cry over that walk-away musician. After banishing all music from her life, she found a way to provide for her daughter. She rolled up her sleeves, and she learned to make shoes. She could have made candy, or fireworks, or sparkly underwear for wrestlers, but no, she chose shoes. Then she taught her daughter to make shoes. And later, she taught her son-in-law. Then her grandkids got roped in. As her family grew, so did the business. Music had torn her family apart. But shoes held them all together. You see, that woman was my great-great grandmother, Mamá Imelda. She died way before I was born. But my family still tells her story every year on ''Dia De Los Muertos.'' The Day of the Dead.
* I think we're the only family in Mexico who hates music. And my family's fine with that. But me? I'm not like the rest of my family!
* I know I'm not supposed to love music. But it's not my fault! It's ''his!'' Ernesto de la Cruz… the greatest musician of all time. He started out a total nobody from Santa Cecilia, like me. But when he played music, he made people fall in love with him. He starred in movies, he had the coolest guitar! he could fly! And he wrote the best songs!
* No more hiding, Dante. I gotta seize my moment. I'm gonna play in Mariachi Plaza if it kills me!
* Mamá Coco, is your papá Ernesto de la Cruz?
* ''[to the portrait of Ernesto on the wall]'' Señor de la Cruz, please don't be mad. I'm Miguel. Your great-great grandson. ''[takes the guitar off the wall]'' I need to borrow this. ''[sighs]'' Our family thinks music is a curse. None of them understand but I know you would have. You would've told me to follow my heart. To seize my moment! So, if it's all right with you, I'm gonna play in the plaza, just like you did!
* ''[to Héctor, realizing that '''he''' is his real great-great grandfather]'' A minute ago I thought I was related to a murderer. You're a total upgrade!

== Héctor ==
* Our memories, they have to be passed down by those who knew us in life - in the stories they tell about us. But there's no one left alive to pass down Chiche's stories.
* ''[furiously attacking De La Cruz for poisoning him]'' YOU TOOK EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME! YOU RAT!

== Dialogue ==
:'''Miguel:''' ''[finishing his opening narration]'' Sometimes I look at de la Cruz, a-and I get this feeling, like we're connected somehow. Like... if he could play music... maybe someday, I could too. ''[cuts to him at the plaza revealing he's actually talking to a mariachi guy]'' If it wasn't for my family.
:'''Mariachi''': ''[impatient]'' Ay, ay, ay, muchacho.
:'''Miguel:''' Huh?
:'''Mariachi:''' I asked for a shoe shine, not your life story!
:'''Miguel:''' Oh, yeah, sorry. ''[shines his shoes]'' I just can't really talk about any of this at home, so...
:'''Mariachi''': Look, if I were you, I'd march right up to my family and say, &quot;Hey! I'm a musician, deal with it!&quot;.
:'''Miguel''': I could ''never'' say that.
:'''Mariachi''': You are a musician, no? 
:'''Miguel''': I-I-I don't know. I mean... I only really play for myself.
:'''Mariachi''': Nah! Did de la Cruz become the world's best musician by hiding his sweet, sweet skills? No! He walked out onto that plaza and he played out loud! ''[spots something]'' Ah, ''mira, mira!'' They're setting up for tonight! The music competition for Día de Muertos! You wanna be like your hero? You should sign up!
:'''Miguel''': Uh-Uh, my family would ''freak!''
:'''Mariachi''': Look, if you're too scared, then, well...have fun making shoes! ''[pauses; to Miguel]'' Come on, what did de la Cruz always say?
:'''Miguel''': &quot;Seize your moment&quot;?
:'''Mariachi''': ''[showing his guitar]'' Show me what you got, ''muchacho.'' I'll be your first audience. ''[Miguel takes the guitar and is about to play when...]''
:'''Elena''': ''[in the distance, furious]'' MIGUEL!
:'''Miguel''': Ah! ''[gives the guitar back and Elena is stomping up the street with Rosa and Berto following.]'' Abuelita!
:'''Elena''': What are you doing here?!
:'''Miguel''': Um... oh... uh...
:'''Elena''': ''[thrusts her shoe in the mariachi's face]'' You leave my grandson alone!
:'''Mariachi''': ''Doña'', please! I was just getting a shine!
:'''Elena''': I know your tricks, mariachi! ''[to Miguel]'' What did he say to you?
:'''Miguel''': He was just showing me his guitar.
:''[Berto and Rosa gasp]''
:'''Berto''': Shame on you!
:'''Elena''': ''[pushing her shoe further]'' My grandson is a ''[childishly]'' sweet, little ''angelito, perrito, cielito!'' ''[furiously, pushes the mariachi off the bench]'' He wants ''no'' part of your music, mariachi. You keep away from him. ''[The marachi crawls away and takes his hat with him; to Miguel, childishly] Ay, pobrecito! [hugs him] Estas bien, mijo. [kisses his head]'' You know better than to be here in this place! You will come home. '''''Now.'''''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Elena''': Don't give me that look. ''Día de los Muertos'' is the one night of the year our ancestors can come visit us. We've put their photos on the ''ofrenda'' so their spirits can cross over. That is ''very'' important. If we don't put them up, they can't come. We made all this food, set out the things they loved in life, ''mijo.'' All this work to bring the family together. I don't want you sneaking off to who knows where. ''[catches him trying to sneak away]'' Where are you going?
:'''Miguel''': I thought we were done.
:'''Elena''': ''Ay, Dios mio.'' Being part of this family means being ''here'' for this family. I don't want to see you end up like--
:'''Miguel''': Like Mamá Coco's papá?
:'''Elena''': '''''Never''''' mention that man! He's better off forgotten.

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Miguel''': ''[hiding Dante and his DIY guitar under the ofrenda]'' Get under! Get under!
:'''Elena''': ''[enters the ofrenda room with Enrique and Luisa]'' Miguel?
:'''Miguel''': ''[turns around]'' Nothing! ''[smiles nervously]'' Mama, Papa, I…
:'''Enrique''': Miguel, your Abuelita had the most wonderful idea. We've all decided… it's time you joined us in the workshop! ''[puts a leather apron on him]''
:'''Miguel''': What?!
:'''Enrique''': No more shining shoes. You will be making them! Every day after school!
:'''Elena''': Our Migueli-ti-ti-ti-to carrying on the family tradition! And on ''Dia de los Muertos!'' Your ancestors will be so proud! You'll craft huaraches just like your Tía Victoria.
:'''Enrique''': And wingtips, like your Papá Julio!
:'''Miguel''': But what if I'm no good at making shoes?
:'''Enrique''': Ah, Miguel. You have your family here to guide you. You are a Rivera. And a Rivera is...
:'''Miguel''': A shoemaker. Through and through.

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Miguel's Ernesto de la Cruz merchandise is being thrown to the ground after Miguel tells his family that he's going to be a musician when learning that Ernesto is his great-great grandson, later that evening.]''
:'''Elena''': What is all this? You keep secrets from your own family?!
:'''Berto''': It's all that time he spends in the plaza.
:'''Gloria''': Fills his head with crazy fantasies!
:'''Miguel''': It's not a fantasy! That man was Ernesto de la Cruz! ''[gives Enrique the photo of Imelda, young Coco and the unidentified man]'' The greatest musician of all time!
:'''Enrique''': We've never known anything about this man! But whoever he was, he still abandoned his family. This is no future for my son.
:'''Miguel''': But Papa, y-you said my family would guide me. Well, de la Cruz '''is''' my family. I'm supposed to play music.
:'''Elena''': Never! That man's music was a curse! I will ''not'' allow it!
:'''Miguel''': But if you would just let--
:'''Luisa''': ''[sternly]'' Miguel.
:'''Enrique''': You will listen to your family. No. More. Music.
:'''Miguel''': ''[picks up the guitar]'' Just listen to me play!
:'''Enrique''': ''[unconvinced]'' End of argument.
:''[Miguel tries to play the guitar, but Elena quickly snatches it from him.]''
:'''Elena''': ''[holding the guitar]'' You want to end up like that man? Forgotten? Left off your family's ''ofrenda''?!
:'''Miguel:''' ''[angrily snapping]'' I don't care if I'm on some STUPID ''ofrenda''! ''[Abuelita, along with the whole family, gasps in absolute horror at what he just said; Abuelita looks at the guitar and lifts it up, preparing to destroy it; terrified]'' NO!
:'''Enrique:''' Mama...
:'''Abuelita''': ''[smashes the guitar against the ground into pieces 3 times, throws the smashed guitar and makes the cross sign]'' There. No guitar. No music. ''[sees Miguel beginning to cry, tries to comfort him]'' Aw, come. You'll feel better after you eat with your family.
:'''Miguel''': ''[snapping on the verge of tears]'' '''I don't wanna be in this family!''' ''[snatches the photo away from Enrique and runs away]''
:'''Enrique''': Miguel! MIGUEL! 
''[Miguel runs out of the Riveras' home with the photo.]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Silhouette Woman:''' ''[after Miguel falls into an open grave] Dios mio!'' Little boy, are you okay? Here. Let me help you. ''[pulls him out of the grave]''
:'''Miguel''': Thanks. I… 
:''[His rescuer is revealed to be a living female skeleton, and they both scream in horror at each other.]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Miguel''': ''[recognizing the skeletons of his family members]'' Tía Rosita?
:'''Rosita''': ''Sí.''
:'''Miguel''': Papá Julio?
:'''Julio''': ''Hola!''
:'''Miguel''': Tía Victoria?
:'''Victoria''': He doesn't seem ''entirely'' dead.
:'''Rosita''': He's not quite alive either.
:'''Julio''': We need Mama Imelda. She'll know how to fix this.
:'''Oscar''': ''[off-screen] Oye! [runs up to them with his twin brother, Felipe]'' It's Mama Imelda!
:'''Felipe''': She couldn't cross over!
:''[Rosita, Victoria, and Julio all gasp]''
:'''Oscar''': She's stuck!
:'''Felipe''': On the other side!
:'''Miguel''': Tío Oscar? Tío Felipe?
:'''Oscar''': Oh. Hey, Miguel. ''[he and his twin brother both gasp]''
:'''Victoria''': I have a feeling this has something to do with you.
:'''Rosita''': But if Mama Imelda can't come to us…
:'''Julio''': Then we are going to her. ''Vamanos!''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Miguel sees the Land of the Dead for the first time]''
:'''Miguel''': This isn't a dream then! You're all really out there!
:'''Victoria''': You thought we ''weren't''?
:'''Miguel''': Oh, I don't know. I thought it might have been one of those made-up things, that adults tell kids, like vitamins.
:'''Victoria''': Miguel, vitamins are a real thing.
:'''Miguel''': Well, now I'm thinking maybe they ''could'' be.
:''[A skeleton girl, walking with her mother, looks at Miguel and points to him]''
:'''Skeleton Mother''': ''Mija,'' it's not nice to stare at-- ''[looks at Miguel] Ay!'' Santa Maria!

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Héctor steps up to the Departure Agent, disguised as Frida Kahlo]''
:'''Héctor''': Yes, it is I, Frida Kahlo. Shall we skip the scanner? I'm on so many ''ofrendas'', it will just overwhelm your blinky thingy.
:''[The machine scans Héctor; an X appears on the screen, and a buzzer goes off.]''
:'''Departure Agent''': Whoa, shoot. Looks like no one put up your photo, &quot;Frida&quot;.
:''[Héctor sheds his disguise]''
:'''Héctor''': Okay, when I said I was Frida, just now, that... that was a lie. And I apologize for doing that.
:'''Departure Agent''': No photo on an ''ofrenda'', no crossing the bridge.
:'''Héctor''': You know what? I'm just gonna zip right over, you won't even know I'm gone! ''[Héctor zooms toward the door and splits himself past the guard.]'' Ha-ha! ''[He rushes toward the bridge as Miguel watches; he begins to sink into the petals.]'' Almost... there... just a little... further... ''[struggles to stand up but fails]'' Ugh. ''[picked up by two guards]''
:'''Male guard''': Up-sy daisy.
:'''Héctor''': Fine! Okay! Fine! Who cares?! ''[spits out some petals]'' DUMB FLOWER BRIDGE!
:'''Rosita''': Aw, I don't know what I'd do if no one put up my photo.
:'''Arrival Agent''': Next!
:'''Rosita''': Oh, come, ''mijo!'' It's our turn!
:'''Arrival Agent''': Welcome back, ''amigos''! Anything to declare?
:'''Julio''': A-as a matter of fact… yes. ''[shows him Miguel and giggles nervously]''
:'''Miguel''': ''Hola.''
:''[The Arrival Agent's jaw drops, detaching from its skull]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Imelda''': ''[to a case worker angrily]'' I ''demand'' to speak to the person in charge!
:'''Case Worker''': I'm sorry, ''señora'', but it says here no one put up your photo!
:'''Imelda''': My family always, '''ALWAYS''' put my photo on the ''ofrenda. [takes off her boot and smashes the computer with it]'' That devil box tells you ''nothing'' but lies!
:'''Julio''': ''[as he and the dead Riveras approach nervously]'' Mamá Imelda? ''[Imelda aims her boot at him; he shrieks]''
:'''Imelda''': ''[snapping out]'' Oh, ''mi familia''! They wouldn't let me cross the bridge! Tell this woman and her devil box that my photo ''is'' on the ''ofrenda''!
:'''Julio''': Well, w-we never made it to the ''ofrenda''.
:'''Imelda''': What? 
:'''Julio''':  We ran into uh... um...
:'''Imelda''': ''[gasps]'' Miguel?
:'''Miguel''': ''[sheepishly]'' Mama Imelda.
:'''Imelda''': What is going on?
:'''Head Clerk''': ''[comes out of the office door]'' You the Rivera family? ''[later… in his office; to Miguel]'' Well, you're cursed.
:'''Miguel''': ''[as the deceased Riveras gasp]'' What?!
:'''Head Clerk''': ''Dia de los Muertos'' is the night to give to the dead. You ''stole'' from the dead!
:'''Migue''': But I wasn't stealing the guitar.
:'''Imelda''': Guitar?
:'''Miguel''': It was my great-great-grandfather's! He would've wanted me to have it.
:'''Imelda''': Ah, ah, ah! We do '''''not''''' speak of that &quot;musician.&quot; He is dead to this family.
:'''Miguel''': Uh, you're ''all'' dead.
:'''Head Clerk''': ''[sneezes as Dante gets close]'' I am sorry, whose alebrije is that?
:'''Miguel''': That's just Dante.
:'''Rosita''': He sure doesn't look like an alebrije.
:'''Oscar''': He just looks like a plain old dog...
:'''Felipe''': Or a sausage someone dropped in a barbershop.
:'''Head Clerk''': Whatever he is, I am ''[sneezes]'' terribly allergic.
:'''Miguel''': But Dante doesn't have any hair.
:'''Head Clerk''': And I don’t have a nose, and yet here we are. ''[sneezes again]''
:'''Imelda''': But none of this explains why ''I'' couldn't cross over!
:'''Miguel''': Oh. (I think I know why.) ''[chuckles nervously as he takes out the photo of Imelda, young Coco and the faceless man from his jacket pocket and holds it up]''
:''[All the deceased Riveras gasp in shock.]''
:'''Imelda''': ''[shocked]'' You took my photo off the ''ofrenda?!''
:'''Miguel''': It was an accident!

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The Head Clerk gives Imelda a marigold petal to start her blessing to send Miguel home]''
:'''Head Clerk''': Now, you look at the living and say his name.
:'''Imelda''': ''[bitterly]'' Miguel.
:'''Head Clerk''': Nailed it! Now say, &quot;I give you my blessing.&quot;.
:'''Imelda''': I give you my blessing. ''[The marigold petal glows; Miguel is amazed]'' I give you my blessing to go home... ''[the petal glows brighter]'' to put my photo back on the ''ofrenda''... ''[even brighter, Miguel nods]'' and to '''''never play music again!'''''
:'''Miguel''': What?! She can't do that!
:'''Head Clerk''': Well, technically, she can add any condition she wants.
:'''Miguel''': ''[frowns]'' Fine.
:'''Head Clerk''': Then you hand the petal to Miguel.
:''[Miguel takes the petal; in a flash, he's back in the mausoleum. He looks out the window.]''
:'''Miguel''': No skeletons! ''[stares smugly at Ernesto's guitar and takes it]'' Mariachi Plaza, here I come! ''[Not even 2 steps later, he's back in the Land of the Dead; he is caught by Imelda.]''
:'''Imelda''': Two seconds, and you already break your promise!
:'''Miguel''': This isn't fair, it's my life! You already had yours! ''[takes Imelda's petal]'' Papá Julio, I ask for your blessing! ''[Julio cringes nervously; one by one, each dead Rivera resists]'' Tía Rosita? Oscar? Felipe? Tía Victoria? ''[Victoria just shakes her head, meaning no]''
:'''Imelda''': Don't make this hard, ''mijo''. You go home my way, or ''no'' way.
:'''Miguel''': You really hate music that much?!
:'''Imelda''': I will not let you go down the same path he did!
:'''Miguel''': ''[looks at the photo]'' The same path he did... ''he'' did.
:'''Victoria''': Listen to your Mamá Imelda.
:'''Oscar''': She's just looking out for you.
:'''Rosita''': Be reasonable.
:'''Miguel''': ''[stagey]'' ''Con permiso'', I need to visit the restroom. ''[exits]'' Be right back!
:'''Head Clerk''': Uh... should we tell him there are no restrooms in the Land of the Dead?

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Corrections Officer''': Disturbing the peace, fleeing an officer, falsifying a unibrow...
:'''Héctor''': That's illegal? ''[detaches his head]''
:'''Corrections Officer''': ''Very'' illegal. You need to clean up your act, ''amigo''.
:'''Héctor''': ''[screws his head back on] &quot;Amigo&quot;?'' Oh, that's-that's so nice to hear you say that, because... I have just had a really hard Día de Muertos and I could really use an ''amigo'' right now. ''[detaches his hands; they act like holding shoulders]'' And ''amigos''... they help their ''amigos. [reattaches hands]'' Listen, you get me across that bridge tonight, and I'll make it worth your while. ''[spots a poster of Ernesto on the wall]'' Oh! You like de la Cruz? He and I go ''way'' back! I can get you front row seats to his Sunrise Spectacular show! I-I-I'll get you backstage, you can meet him! You just gotta let me cross that bridge!
:'''Corrections Officer''': I should lock you up for the rest of the holiday. But my shift's almost up and... I wanna visit my living family, so I'm letting you off with a warning. ''[gives Héctor a warning ticket, he snatches it]''
:'''Héctor''': Can I at least get my costume back?
:'''Corrections Officer''': Uh... no.
:'''Héctor''': Ohh! ''[stomps past Miguel]'' Some ''amigo... [crumples the warning ticket]''
:'''Miguel''': ''[catches up to him]'' Hey, hey! You really know de la Cruz?
:'''Héctor''': Who wants to...? ''[notices Miguel and shrieks]'' Ah! '''Ay!''' You're alive!
:'''Miguel''': Shh!! ''[takes him inside a phone booth to hide]'' Yes, I'm alive. And if I want to get back to the Land of the Living, I need de la Cruz's blessing.
:'''Héctor''': That's weirdly specific.
:'''Miguel''': He's my great-great-grandfather.
:'''Héctor''': ''[completely dumbstruck]'' He's your gr-gr-gr... Wait, what?! ''[his eyeballs drop into his mouth]''
:'''Miguel''': Ugh.
:'''Héctor''': ''[pushes his eyeballs back into place]'' Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait. ''[gasps]'' Wait, no, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wai-wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait. ''[gasps again]'' Yes! You're going back to the Land of the Living!
:''[They exit the phone booth.]''
:'''Miguel''': You know what? Maybe this isn't such a good...
:'''Héctor''': No! ''[snaps his fingers, and stops Miguel] Niño, niño, niño!'' I-I can help you. You can help me. We can help each other. ''[Miguel can see Imelda and the dead Riveras heading downstairs in front of him]'' But most importantly, you can help me!
:'''Imelda''': MIGUEL!
:'''Miguel''': Ah!
:'''Héctor''': I'm Héctor. ''[extends his hand]''
:'''Miguel''': Uh... that's nice! ''[grabs his arm and they both run away]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Hector''': ''[upon hearing that Miguel's dead family are trying to send him home]'' Wait, wait, wait. You said de la Cruz was your only family. The '''ONLY''' person who could send you home.
:'''Miguel''': I do have other family, but–-
:'''Hector''': You could have taken my photo back this whole time?!
:'''Miguel''': But they hate music. I need a musician's blessing!
:'''Hector''': ''[angrily]'' You lied to me!
:'''Miguel''': Oh-ho, you're one to talk.
:'''Hector''': ''[desperately]'' Look at me. I'm being forgotten, Miguel. I don't even know if I'm gonna last the night! I'm not gonna miss my one chance to cross that bridge, 'cause you want to live out some stupid musical fantasy!
:'''Miguel''': It's not stupid!
:'''Hector''': I'm taking you to your family. ''[grabs Miguel's arm and pulls him to the stage, but Miguel pulls away]''
:'''Miguel''': Let go of me!
:'''Hector''': You'll thank me later.
:'''Miguel''': You don't wanna help me. You only care about yourself! ''[pulls out Hector's photo from his pocket and throws it at him. Hector chases after it in the wind.]'' Keep your dumb photo! Stay away from me!
:'''Hector''': Hey, chamaco, where did you go? Chamaco! Sorry. Come back!
:''[Miguel keeps walking away while Dante follows and barks at him]''
:'''Miguel''': Dante, cállate! ''[tugs Miguel's leg]'' No, Dante, stop it! He can’t help me! ''[Dante tugs Miguel by the arm]'' Dante, stop! Stop it! Leave me alone! You’re not a spirit guide; you’re just a '''DUMB DOG!''' '''NOW GET OUT OF HERE!'''
:''[Dante, feeling hurt, whines and goes away...]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Miguel was running towards Ernesto's party at his tower in the distance, when Pepita, with Imelda on board, lands in front of him and roars]''
:'''Miguel''': AAH! 
:'''Imelda''': This nonsense ends now, Miguel! I am giving you my blessing and you are going home.
:'''Miguel''': I don't want your blessing! ''[runs through an alley and up the stairs]''
:'''Imelda''': ''[runs upstairs after Miguel]'' Miguel! Stop! Come back! Miguel! I'm trying to save your life!
:'''Miguel''': ''[slips through the metal gate trying to escape]'' You're ''ruining'' my life!
:'''Imelda''': What?!
:'''Miguel''': ''[angrily]'' Music's the only thing that makes me happy. And YOU, you WANNA take that away! YOU'LL NEVER UNDERSTAND! ''[continues marching upstairs]''
:'''Imelda''': ''[singing &quot;La Llorona&quot; to prove Miguel wrong] Y aunque la vida me cueste, Llorona / No dejar de quiererte.''
:'''Miguel''': I-I thought you hated music.
:'''Imelda''': Oh, I love it. I remember that feeling - when my husband would play and I would sing, and nothing else mattered, but when we had Coco suddenly, there was something in my life that mattered more than music. I wanted to put down roots. He wanted to play for the world. We each made a sacrifice to get what we wanted. Now, you must make a choice.
:'''Miguel''': But I don't wanna pick sides. Why can't you be on my side? That's what families are supposed to do - support you, but you never will. ''[wipes a tear from his eye and runs off]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Héctor starts to confront Ernesto and Miguel when Ernesto was about to give Miguel his blessing.]''
:'''Héctor''': We had a deal, ''chamaco''!
:'''Ernesto''': Who are you? What is the meaning of this? ''[Héctor steps in his Frida Kahlo disguise]'' Oh, Frida! I thought you couldn't make it.
:'''Héctor''': ''[takes off his disguise]'' You said you'd take back my photo. You promised, Miguel!
:'''Ernesto''': ''[to Miguel]'' You know this, uh… man?
:'''Miguel''': I just met him tonight. He told me he knew you.
:'''Ernesto''': ''[widens his eyes in realization]'' H-Héctor?
:'''Héctor''': Please, Miguel. ''[takes out his photo]'' Put my photo up.
:''[Miguel reaches for the photo, but Ernesto takes it]''
:'''Ernesto''': My friend. You're-You're being forgotten.
:'''Héctor''': ''[angrily]'' And whose fault is that?!
:'''Ernesto''': Héctor, please.
:'''Héctor''': Those were ''MY SONGS'' you took. '''''MY''' SONGS'' that made ''YOU'' famous!
:'''Miguel''': What?
:'''Héctor''': If I'm being forgotten, it's because you never told anyone that '''I''' wrote them!
:'''Miguel''': That's crazy. De la Cruz wrote all his own songs.
:'''Héctor''': ''[to Ernesto]'' You want to tell him, or should I?
:'''Ernesto''': Héctor, I never meant to take credit. We made a great team, but you died and I... I only sang your songs because I wanted to keep a part of you alive.
:'''Héctor''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, how generous.
:'''Miguel''': You really did play together.
:'''Héctor''':  Look, I don't want to fight about it. I just want you to make it right. Miguel can put my photo up.
:'''Ernesto''': Héctor...
:'''Héctor''': And I can cross over the bridge. I can see my girl. Ernesto, remember the night I left?
:'''Ernesto''': That was a long time ago.
:'''Héctor''': We drank together, and you told me you would move heaven and earth for your ''amigo''. Well, I'm asking you to, now.
:'''Miguel''': &quot;Heaven and earth&quot;, like in the movie?
:'''Héctor''': What?
:'''Miguel''': That's Don Hidalgo's toast. In the de la Cruz movie, '''El Camino A Casa'''. (''&quot;The Way Home&quot;.'')
:'''Héctor''': I'm talking about my '''REAL''' life, Miguel.
:'''Miguel''': No, it's in there. Look!
:''[&quot;El Camino a Casa&quot; is playing on a screen]''
:'''Don Hidalgo''': ''[in movie] Never were truer words spoken. This calls for a toast… to our friendship! Ha-ha! I would move heaven and earth for you, mi amigo.''
:'''Miguel''': But in the movie, Don Hidalgo poisons the drink.
:'''Don Hidalgo''': ''[in movie] Salud! [he and Ernesto toast and drink]''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[in movie; spits it out] Poison! [The fist fight breaks out; Héctor then remembers something]''
:'''Héctor''': That night, Ernesto... the night I left... ''[voiceover] We'd been performing on the road for months. I got homesick and I packed up my songs.''
:''[Flashback shows a younger Héctor packing up his suitcase]''
:'''Young Ernesto''': You wanna give up ''now''... when we're this close to reaching our dream?
:'''Young Héctor''': ''[heading for the door]'' This was ''your'' dream. You'll manage.
:'''Young Ernesto''': ''[grabs the suitcase]'' I can't do this without your songs, Héctor.
:'''Young Héctor''': ''[pulls away]'' I'm going home, Ernesto. Hate me if you want, but my mind is made up.
:'''Young Ernesto''': ''[angry, but then controls himself]'' Oh, I could never hate you. If you must go, then I'm... I'm sending you off with a toast... ''[pours two drinks]'' To our friendship. I would move heaven and earth for you, ''mi amigo. Salud''!
:''[They toast and drink. Later on the streets...]''
:'''Héctor''': ''[voiceover] You walked me to the train station... [stumbles and clutches his stomach, painfully] But I felt a pain in my stomach. I thought it must have been something I ate.''
:'''Young Ernesto''': Perhaps, it was that chorizo, my friend.
:'''Héctor''': ''Or something I... drank. [collapses in the street and dies; fade to black] I woke up... dead. [has a realization after the flashback ends]'' You... ''poisoned me''.
:'''Ernesto''': You're confusing movies with reality, Héctor.
:'''Héctor''': All this time… I thought it was just bad luck. ''[Flashback; Ernesto takes Héctor's songbook, reads &quot;Remember Me&quot;.] I never thought that you might have... that you... [the flashback ends; Héctor becomes furious and lunges at Ernesto for murdering him]'' '''''HOW COULD YOU?!'''''
:'''Miguel''': Héctor! ''(Stop!)''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[shocked]'' Security! Security! ''[Two security guards rush into the room.]''
:'''Héctor''': YOU TOOK EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME! '''YOU RAT!''' ''[The security guards pulls him away.]'' 
:'''Ernesto''': ''[stands up from the ground]'' Have him taken care of. He's not well. 
:'''Héctor''': I just wanted to go back home! No! NO!! '''NOOO!!!''' ''[The security guards takes Héctor away.]''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[to Miguel]'' I apologize. Where were we? 
:'''Miguel''': You were going to give me your blessing.
:'''Ernesto''': Yes, uh... Sí. ''[takes the marigold petal from his pocket]'' Miguel, uh... my reputation is very important to me. I would hate to have you think...
:'''Miguel''': That you murdered Héctor for his songs? 
:'''Ernesto''': ''[laughs]'' You don't think that... ''[seriously] Do you?'' 
:'''Miguel''': I... No, everyone knows you're the... the good guy. ''[Ernesto cuts a sharp, doubtful face. He looks at Héctor's photo, then takes it to his pocket]'' Papá Ernesto? My blessing...?
:'''Ernesto''': ''[looks at the petal and crumbles it immediately]'' Security! ''[the security guards rush into the room again]'' Take care of Miguel. He'll be... extending his stay. 
:'''Miguel''': ''[shocked]'' What?! But I'm your family!
:'''Ernesto''': And Héctor was my best friend. ''[smiling cruelly]'' Success doesn't come for free, Miguel. You have to be willing to do whatever it takes to... ''seize'' your moment. ''[Miguel gasps]'' I know you'll understand. ''[The security guards taken Miguel out of the room.]''
:'''Miguel''': No! '''NO!!''' ''[The guards push Miguel towards a cenote pit.]'' '''LET GO!!''' ''[the guards push Miguel into the pit, and he falls, screaming]'' '''NO!!! AAAAAHH!!!'''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Miguel and Héctor get thrown in the cenote pit...]''
:'''Miguel''': Héctor?
:'''Héctor''': Kid?
:'''Miguel''': Oh, Héctor! ''[They embrace each other.]'' You were right. I should have gone back to my family.
:'''Héctor''': Hey-- hey, hey...
:'''Miguel''': They told me not to be like de la Cruz… ''[cries, drying his eye]'' But I didn't listen.
:'''Héctor''': Hey, it's okay...
:'''Miguel''': I told them I didn't care if they remembered me. I didn't care if I was on their stupid ''ofrenda''. ''[sobs quietly]''
:'''Héctor''': ''[hugs Miguel]'' Hey, ''chamaco'', it's okay. It's okay.
:'''Miguel''': I told them I didn't care. ''[sobs, Hector suddenly spasms, surging with gold light and falls to the ground, weakly.]'' Héctor! Héctor?
:'''Héctor''': She's... forgetting me.
:'''Miguel''': Who?
:'''Héctor''': My daughter.
:'''Miguel''': ''She's'' the reason... you wanted to cross the bridge.
:'''Héctor''':  I just wanted to see her again. I never should've left Santa Cecilia. I wish I could apologize. I wish I could tell her that her papa was trying to come home… that he loved her so much. ''[long pause]'' My Coco.
:'''Miguel''': ''[completely surprised]'' Coco? ''[shows him the photo of Imelda, young Coco and the unknown man]''
:'''Héctor''':  Whe-Where did you get this?
:'''Miguel''': ''[points to young Coco]'' That's my Mamá Coco. ''[points to Imelda]'' That's my Mamá Imelda. ''[points to the faceless father]'' Is that... you?
:'''Héctor''': ''[with realization]'' We're...
:'''Miguel and Héctor''': ...''family? [smile at each other]''
:'''Héctor''': ''[looks at the photo sadly, with his memory recovered]'' I always hoped I'd see her again. That she'd miss me. Maybe put up my photo… but it never happened. You know the worst part? Even if I never got to see Coco in the living world, I thought at least one day I'd see her here. Give her the biggest hug. But she's the last person who remembers me. The moment she's gone from the living world...
:'''Miguel''': ...you disappear from this one. You'll never get to see her.
:'''Héctor''': Ever again. ''[long pause]'' You know, I wrote her a song once. We used to sing it every night at the same time, no matter how far apart we were. What I wouldn't give to sing it to her... one... last... time. 

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Miguel''': ''[realizing about Ernesto]'' He stole your guitar. He stole your songs. ''You'' should be the one the world remembers, not de la Cruz!
:'''Héctor''': I didn't write &quot;Remember Me&quot; for the world. I wrote it for Coco. ''[looks at Miguel sadly]'' I'm a pretty sorry excuse for a great-great grandpa.
:'''Miguel''': Are you kidding? A minute ago, I thought I was related to a murderer. You're a total upgrade. ''[excitedly]'' My whole life, there is something that made me different. I never knew where it came from. But now I know... it... it comes from you. I'm proud we're family! ''[runs up happily] I’M PROUD TO BE HIS FAMILY!! [lets out a loud grito]''
:'''Héctor''': ''[happily jumps up with a loud grito]'' I'M PROUD TO BE HIS FAMILY!
:'''Miguel''': ''[loud grito, then suddenly heard a howling sound coming from the hole of a cenote pit]'' Dante? ''[Dante appears and barks happily]'' Dante! ''[laughs]'' It's Dante! ''[Pepita appears with a loud mighty roar which shakes the stalactites, Miguel laughs with joy until Imelda appeared above Pepita.]'' 
:'''Héctor''' ''[smiles nervously]'' Imelda!
:'''Imelda''': ''[sternly, recognizing her husband]'' Héctor.
:'''Héctor''': You look good!
 
&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Imelda and Pepita rescues Miguel and Héctor from the cenote pit and reuniting with the rest of the Rivera family]''
: '''Imelda''': ''[hugs Miguel]'' Mijo, I was so worried! Thank goodness we found you in time! ''[turns to Héctor angrily]'' And '''YOU!''' How many times must I turn you away?!
:'''Héctor''': Imelda...
:'''Imelda''': I want nothing to do with you! Not in life, not in death! I spent decades protecting my family from your mistakes. He spent 5 minutes with you and I have to fish him out of a sinkhole!
:'''Miguel''': ''[gets in front of Héctor]'' I... I wasn't in there because of Héctor. He was in there because of me. He was just trying to get me home. I didn't want to listen, but he was right. Nothing is more important than family. I'm ready to accept your blessing. And your conditions. But first, I need to find de la Cruz. To get Héctor's photo.
:'''Imelda''': What? 
:'''Miguel''': So he can see Coco again. Héctor should be on our ''ofrenda''. He's part of our family.
:'''Imelda''': He ''LEFT'' this family!
:'''Miguel''': He tried to go home to you and Coco. But de la Cruz murdered him!
:''[Imelda looks at Héctor in shock.]''
:'''Héctor''': It's true, Imelda.
:'''Imelda''': And so ''what'' if it's true?! You leave me alone with a child to raise and I'm just supposed to forgive you?!
:'''Héctor''': Imelda, I-- ''[starts to spasm as he surges with gold light, and collapses onto his knees]''
:'''Miguel''': Héctor?
:''[Imelda gasps]''
:'''Héctor''': I'm running out of time. It's Coco.
:'''Imelda''': She's forgetting you.
:'''Miguel''': ''[helps Héctor up]'' You don't have to forgive him, but we shouldn't forget him.
:''[The Rivera family looks on in sadness]''
:'''Imelda''': I wanted to forget you. I wanted Coco to forget you too, but--
:'''Héctor''': This is my fault, not yours. I'm sorry, Imelda.
:'''Imelda''':  ''[looks at Héctor, then Miguel]'' Miguel, if we help get his photo, you will return home? No more music?
:'''Miguel''': Family comes first.
:'''Imelda''': ''[to Héctor]'' I... I can't forgive you… but I will help you. ''[to Miguel]'' So how do we get to de la Cruz?
:'''Miguel''': I might know a way.

&lt;hr widt:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Backstage at the Sunrise Spectacular, Ernesto bumps into Imelda and the Riveras.]''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[to Imelda]'' Don't I know you? 
:'''Imelda''': ''[removes her boot, and hits Ernesto across the skull]'' That's for murdering ''the love of my life!''
:'''Ernesto''': Who?! Who the-- 
:'''Héctor''': ''[appears around the corner]'' She's talking about ME! ''[to Imelda, lovestruck]'' ''I'm'' the love of your life? 
:'''Imelda''': I don't know! I'm still angry at you.
:'''Ernesto''': Héctor?! How did you--?
:'''Imelda''': ''[hits Ernesto with her boot again]'' And that's for trying to murder my grandson! 
:'''Ernesto''': Grandson?!
:'''Miguel''': ''[also appears around the corner]'' She's talking about ''me''!
:'''Ernesto''': YOU! ''[realized]'' Wait… you're ''related'' to '''Héctor?'''
:'''Miguel''': The photo! ''[points to Héctor's photo in Ernesto's shirt pocket]''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[backs away as the Rivera family glares at him]'' Uh… ''[runs off]''
:'''Imelda''': After him!

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Imelda finishes &quot;La Llorona&quot; and begins to bless Miguel]''
:'''Imelda''': Miguel, I give you my blessing... ''[the petal glows and gets brighter with each condition]'' ...to go home, to put up our photos, and to never--
:'''Miguel''': ''[bitterly]'' Never play music again.
:''[pausing out/pauses in]''
:'''Imelda''': To ''never''... forget how much your family loves you.
:''[Miguel smiles at Imelda's acceptance to music]''
:'''Héctor''': You're going home.
:''[Miguel reaches out to grab the petal, but Ernesto swipes him away]''
:'''Ernesto''': You're not going ''anywhere!''
:''[Imelda yells and charges at Ernesto, but the villainous musician pushes her away.]''
:'''Héctor''': Imelda! ''[runs to her]''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[as the dead Riveras surround him while dragging Miguel towards the building's edge]'' Stay back! Stay back! All of you, stay back! Not one more step!
:''[Dante flies down and tries to tug Miguel back by the shoe.]''
:'''Miguel''': Dante!
:''[Ernesto flings Miguel to the ground, his hoodie falling off.]''
:'''Héctor''': Ernesto, stop! ''[surges and falls to the ground, knocking down a microphone]'' Leave the boy alone!
:'''Ernesto''': I've worked too hard, Héctor. Too hard to let him destroy ''everything!''
:''[As Rosita angles a camera on him, Victoria presses a button for the camera]''
:'''Héctor''': He's a living child, Ernesto!
:'''Ernesto''': He's a '''THREAT!''' ''[The action appears on the jumbotrons onstage; the word &quot;threat&quot; echos, making the crowd confused]'' You think I'd let him go back to the Land of the Living with your photo? To keep your memory ''alive?'' '''No.'''
:'''Miguel''': You're a coward!
:'''Ernesto''': I am Ernesto de la Cruz. The greatest musician of all time!
:'''Miguel''': ''[stands up and confronts Ernesto for his lies]'' Héctor's the ''REAL'' musician! You're just the guy who murdered him and stole his songs! ''[The crowd gasps in shocked horror, as they never heard of that before.]''
:'''Male Audience Member''': &quot;Murdered&quot;?
:'''Ernesto''': ''[grabs Miguel by the tank top]'' I am the one who's willing to do what it takes to seize my moment. '''''Whatever it takes.''''' ''[tosses Miguel over the building's edge]''
:'''Héctor''': NO!
:''[The crowd gasps in absolute shock.]''
:'''Imelda''': MIGUEL!
:'''Felipe''': MIGUEL!
:'''Ernesto''': ''[to Héctor]'' Apologies, old friend, but the show must go on.

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Ernesto's crimes are exposed to the Land of the Dead, Ernesto straighten his hair up, unaware that Miguel's family had broadcasted his crimes and turned the audience against him]''
:'''Ernesto''': Ha, ha! ''[The audience starts booing at him as he laughs nervously]'' Please, please, ''mi familia''!
:'''Audience Member #1''': Murderer!
:'''Audience Member #2''': Get off the stage!
:'''Ernesto''': Orchestra! A-1, A-2, A-1... ''[The conductor breaks his baton in half in contempt, without any words to say; singing] Remember me, though I have to s– [A tomato is thrown at his jacket]'' Hey! ''[The audience continues booing as they start throwing food at Ernesto.]''
:'''Female Audience Member''': ''[looks up, and points]'' Look!
:''[On one of the jumbotrons, Pepita and Dante fly up onto the building's edge with Miguel on Pepita's back. As Miguel slides down Pepita's wing, the other Riveras hug him. The crowd cheers. Ernesto looks shocked because of his crimes being exposed. With a determined scowl, Pepita walks onto the stage, and growls at Ernesto]''
:'''Ernesto''': ''[chuckles nervously as he walks backwards while Pepita closes in on him]'' Here kitty, Nice kitty, Big kitty. ''[Pepita roars in Ernesto's face, then headbutts him, sending him flying. She then catches him by his waist as she flies off]'' Put me down! Please! I'm begging you! Stop it, stop that! ''[A cameraman follows Pepita]'' Ow, ow! ''[Pepita flips him into the air, then smacks him away with her tail. The villainous musician goes flying, then notices something up ahead]'' No! ''[screams, then smacks face-first into a large church bell, then lands beneath it. Appearing to be unharmed, he looks up and gasps in horror as the bell falls on top of him… again. As the crowd cheers in jubilant, a skeleton sits beside his wife while holding two ears of corn]''
:'''Male Audience Member''': ''[to his wife]'' What did I miss?
:''[Back with the Riveras]''
:'''Miguel''': Good boy, Dante. 
:'''Imelda''': Miguel! ''[they hug each other]'' 
:''[Héctor surges and falls to the ground, his life force nearly gone.]''
:'''Miguel''': Héctor! ''[runs up to him]'' The photo… I-I-I lost it!
:'''Héctor''': ''[sitting up]'' It's okay, ''mijo.'' It's... ''[the surging worsens, spasms more and faints]''
:'''Miguel''': HÉCTOR! Héctor?!
:'''Héctor''': ''[moans, whispers]'' Coco...
:'''Miguel''': No, we can still find the photo!
:'''Imelda''': Miguel, it's almost sunrise!
:''[The sun begins to rise; Miguel's skeleton transformation has now reached up to his face, Héctor weakly places his hand on his face.]''
:'''Miguel''': No, no, no. I can't leave you! I promised I put your photo up! I promised you'd see Coco!
:'''Héctor''': We're both out of time, ''mijo''. [surges yet again]''
:'''Miguel''': No! No! She can't forget you!
:'''Héctor''': I just wanted her to know... that I loved her. ''[takes out a marigold petal, surging once more]''
:'''Miguel''': Héctor!
:'''Héctor''': You have our blessing... Miguel.
:'''Imelda''': ''[holds the petal with Héctor]'' No conditions.
:''[The petal glows and they contour it toward Miguel]''
:'''Miguel''': No, Papá Héctor! ''Please!!'' ''[The dead Riveras and Dante mourn sadly]'' No...! ''[panting sadly]''
:'''Héctor''': Go home. ''[smiles and surges one final time]''
:'''Miguel''': I promise '''''I won't let Coco forget you!''' [the petal touches him] '''AHH!!'''''
:''[A flash of petals, and the view fades to white; Miguel wakes up in the mausoleum and flees for home with the skull guitar in hand.]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Miguel makes it to Mamá Coco’s room; she is sitting in her wheelchair, staring into space, vacantly.]''
:'''Miguel:''' Mamá Coco, can you hear me? It's Miguel. I saw your papa. Remember? Papa? Please! If you forget him, he'll be gone. Forever!
:''[Mamá Coco's mind has gone blank and she doesn't respond.]''
:'''Enrique''': ''[from outside, banging the locked door]'' Miguel, open this door!
:'''Miguel''': ''[showing Hector's guitar]'' Here, this was his guitar, right? He used to play it to you? See, there he is. ''[turns Mama Coco's head to face the photo]'' Papá, remember? Papá? ''[No answer from Coco still.]''
:'''Enrique''': ''[from outside]'' MIGUEL!
:'''Miguel''': ''[begging]'' Mamá Coco, ''please''! Don't forget him!
:''[The door opens, and the Riveras enter.]''
:'''Elena''': What are you doing to that poor woman?! ''[comforts her mama]'' It's okay, Mamita. It's okay.
:'''Enrique''': What's gotten into you?! ''[Miguel begins to cry, hugs him; embraces him]'' I thought I'd lost you, Miguel.
:'''Miguel''': I'm sorry, Papá.
:'''Luisa''': We're all together now, that's what matters.
:'''Miguel''': Not all of us...
:'''Elena''': It's okay, Mamita. ''[at Miguel, firmly]'' Miguel, you apologize to your Mamá Coco.
:'''Miguel''': ''[walks over to Coco]'' Mamá Coco... ''[stubs his foot against Héctor's guitar and gets an idea.]''
:'''Elena''': ''[impatiently]'' Well? Apologize!
:'''Miguel''': ''[holding up the guitar]'' Mamá Coco? Your papá, he wanted you to have this... ''[begins strumming; Abuelita tries to intervene, but Papa stops her]''
:'''Enrique:''' Mamá, wait.
:''[Miguel starts playing &quot;Remember Me&quot;.]''
:'''Miguel''' ''[sings, tearfully]'': ''Remember me, though I have to say goodbye.&lt;br /&gt;Remember me, don't let it make you cry''
:'''Luisa''': Look.
:''[Coco begins to slowly lift her head.]''
:'''Miguel''': ''For even if I'm far away, I hold you in my heart.&lt;br /&gt;I sing a secret song to you each night we are apart.&lt;br /&gt;Remember me, though I have to travel far''
:'''Miguel and Coco''' ''[singing along]'': ''Remember me, each time you hear a sad guitar&lt;br /&gt;Know that I'm with you, the only way that I can be until you're in my arms again.&lt;br /&gt;Remember... me.''
:''[Coco smiles, memory recovered; Abuelita tears up happily.]''
:'''Coco''': Elena? What's wrong, ''mija''?
:'''Elena''': Nothing, Mamá. Nothing at all.
:'''Coco''': ''[to Miguel]'' My papá used to sing me that song.
:'''Miguel''': He loved you, Mamá Coco. Your papá loved you so much.
:''[Coco smiles and opens the drawer on her nightstand, taking out a notebook.]''
:'''Coco''': I kept... his letters... poems he wrote me... and... ''[skims through the book until she reveals a ripped up piece of paper. It's the missing part of the photo from the ''ofrenda'', Héctor's face, which Miguel matches with.]'' Papá was a musician… when I was a little girl; He and Mamá would sing such beautiful songs... ''[continues talking as the Riveras listen]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[One year later; Mamá Coco has passed away, Miguel's baby sister, Sakorro is born, and everyone starts preparing for ''Día de los Muertos'']''
:'''Miguel''': ''[showing his baby sister the family photos on the Rivera family ofrenda]'' And that man is your Papá Julio. And there's Tía Rosita, and your Tía Victoria. And those two are Oscar and Felipe. These aren't just old pictures, they're our family. And they're counting on us to remember them.
:''[Abuelita then places a photo of Mamá Coco on the ofrenda and Miguel hugs her]''

&lt;hr width:&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Coco''': ''[off-screen]'' Papá. ''[comes to him]''
:'''Hector''': ''[happily]'' Coco! ''[kisses her on the head and they both hug, tightly]''

==Taglines==
*The celebration of a lifetime.
*The adventure of a lifetime.

==Cast==
* [[w:Anthony Gonzalez (actor)|Anthony Gonzalez]] — Miguel
* [[w:Gael García Bernal|Gael García Bernal]] — Hector
* [[Benjamin Bratt]] — Ernesto de la Cruz
* [[w:Renée Victor|Renée Victor]] — Abuelita Helen
* [[w:Ana Ofelia Murguía|Ana Ofelia Murguía]]  — Mamá Coco
* [[w:Alanna Ubach|Alanna Ubach]] — Mamá Imelda
* [[w:Alfonso Arau|Alfonso Arau]] — Papá Julio
* [[w:George C. Scott|George C. Scott's Ghost]] – Rodrigo the El Chupacabla
* [[w:Selene Luna|Selene Luna]] — Rosita
* Diana Ortellí — Victoria
* Herbert Siguenza — Felipe and Oscar
* [[w:Jaime Camil|Jaime Camil]] — Papá Enrique
* [[w:Sofía Espinosa|Sofía Espinosa]] — Mamá Luisa
* [[Edward James Olmos]] — Chicharrón
* [[Luis Valdez]] — Berto
* [[w:Lombardo Boyar|Lombardo Boyar]] — Mariachi
* [[w:Octavio Solis|Octavio Solis]] — the Arrival Agent
* [[w:Gabriel Iglesias|Gabriel Iglesias]] — the Head Clerk
* [[Cheech Marin]] — a Corrections Officer
* [[w:Carla Medina|Carla Medina]] — Departure Agent
* Blanca Araceli — an Emcee
* [[w:Natalia Cordova-Buckley|Natalia Cordova-Buckley]] — Frida Kahlo
* Salvador Reyes — Security Guard
* [[w:John Ratzenberger|John Ratzenberger]] — Juan Ortodoncia
* [[Frank Welker]] — Dante and Pepita

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{IMDb title|2380307}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2017 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2017 American animated films]]
[[Category:Disney films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Animated coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age comedy-drama films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Day of the Dead films]]
[[Category:Ghost films]]
[[Category:Best Animated Feature Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Animated films about death]]
[[Category:Films about families]]
[[Category:Films set in Mexico]]
[[Category:Films directed by Lee Unkrich]]
[[Category:Pixar]]</text>
      <sha1>tl49apf5iwzjwj9exdkz5cgl7m4pren</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Vladislav Doronin</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>199582</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964995</id>
      <parentid>3363404</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:31:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39668-30</username>
        <id>3350075</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>add quote</comment>
      <origin>3964995</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1801" sha1="s57iglhge6u0fcpbajmrgj6a0kcnmk0" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Vladislav Doronin|Vladislav Doronin]]''' (born 7 November 1962) is an international businessman and [[real estate]] developer.

{{businesspeople-stub}} 
== Quotes ==

* Wellness is not only related to the physical, but also to the strength of the connection between the body and mind.
** Interview with Spa.com [http://www.spabusiness.com/TP_counter.cfm?sitecode=SB&amp;linktype=story&amp;codeID=31102&amp;viewtype=online]
* In any case, I am usually in bed by midnight.
** Interview with FT.com [https://howtospendit.ft.com/travel/202189-vladislav-doronin-s-perfect-weekend-in-miami]
*Airbnb is not our competitor.
**Interview with Robb Report [http://robbreport.com/travel/hotels/is-the-traditional-hotel-chain-dead-2779282/]
*I was one of the first guests at the hotel when it opened 30 years ago. Experiencing that warm, pared-back luxury with extraordinary architecture, generosity of space and supreme service… that was the beginning of my story with Aman. 
**Interview with CN Traveler [https://www.cntraveller.com/gallery/vladislav-doronins-favourite-places-to-stay]
* The term ‘luxury’ has become heavily overused within residential real estate, and in many cases the high volume of inventory does not truly deliver the level of privacy, service, design, construction quality and overall experience that today’s ultra-high-net-worth buyers expect.
** Interview with Arabian Business [https://www.arabianbusiness.com/abnews/luxury-heavily-overused-term-in-real-estate-aman-ceo-says-as-dubai-prime-property-buyers-move-beyond-labels-exclusive]


== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Doronin, Vladislav}}
[[Category:1962 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Businesspeople from Russia]]
[[Category:People from St. Petersburg]]
[[Category:Businesspeople in real estate]]</text>
      <sha1>s57iglhge6u0fcpbajmrgj6a0kcnmk0</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ono no Komachi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>200202</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965195</id>
      <parentid>3250556</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T05:59:48Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>DanielTom</username>
        <id>608538</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I don't see the point of this red link</comment>
      <origin>3965195</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8250" sha1="g79d2iqkqmenrpk707y8epjwuvqaaua" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Hyakuninisshu 009.jpg|thumb|&lt;p&gt;''Iro miede&lt;br /&gt;Utsurou momo wa&lt;br /&gt;Yo no naka no&lt;br /&gt;Hito no kokoro no&lt;br /&gt;Hana ni zo arikeru''&lt;/p&gt;A thing which fades&lt;br /&gt;With no outward sign—&lt;br /&gt;Is the flower&lt;br /&gt;Of the heart of man&lt;br /&gt;In this world!]]
[[File:Sanjūrokkasen-gaku - 12 - Kanō Tan’yū - Ono no Komachi.jpg|thumb|&lt;p&gt;''Hito ni awan&lt;br /&gt;Tsuki no naki ni wa&lt;br /&gt;Omoiokite&lt;br /&gt;Mune hashiribi ni&lt;br /&gt;Kokoro yakeori''&lt;/p&gt;This night of no moon&lt;br /&gt;There is no way to meet him.&lt;br /&gt;I rise in longing—&lt;br /&gt;My breast pounds, a leaping flame,&lt;br /&gt;My heart is consumed in fire.]]
&lt;!--[[File:Ono no Komachi.jpg|thumb|&lt;p&gt;''Yumeji ni wa&lt;br /&gt;Ashi mo yasumezu&lt;br /&gt;Kayoedo mo&lt;br /&gt;Utsutsu ni hitome&lt;br /&gt;Misbigoto wa arazu''&lt;/p&gt;Following the roads&lt;br /&gt;Of dream to you, my feet&lt;br /&gt;Never rest. But one glimpse of you&lt;br /&gt;In reality would be&lt;br /&gt;Worth all these many nights of love.]]--&gt;
'''[[w:Ono no Komachi|Ono no Komachi]]''' (小野 小町; c. 825 – c. 900) was a [[Japanese]]  [[w:waka (poetry)|waka poet]].　She was renowned for her unusual beauty, and Komachi is today a synonym for feminine beauty in Japan.

==Quotes==
==={{w|Yone Noguchi}}'s ''[[s:The Spirit of Japanese Poetry|The Spirit of Japanese Poetry]]'' (1914)===
:&lt;small&gt;''The Spirit of Japanese Poetry'', trans. Yone Noguchi (John Murray, 1914)&lt;/small&gt;
* The flowers and my love&lt;br/&gt;Passed away under the rain,&lt;br/&gt;While I idly looked upon them&lt;br/&gt;Where is my yester-love?
** p. 112

==={{w|Donald Keene}}'s ''Anthology of Japanese Literature'' (1955)===
:&lt;small&gt;''Anthology of Japanese Literature: From the Earliest Era to the Mid-nineteenth Century'', ed. Donald Keene (Allen &amp; Unwin, 1955)&lt;/small&gt;

* ''Iro miede&lt;br /&gt;Utsurou momo wa&lt;br /&gt;Yo no naka no&lt;br /&gt;Hito no kokoro no&lt;br /&gt;Hana ni zo arikeru''
** A thing which fades&lt;br /&gt;With no outward sign—&lt;br /&gt;Is the flower&lt;br /&gt;Of the heart of man&lt;br /&gt;In this world!
*** trans. {{w|Arthur Waley}}, p. 78

* ''Hito ni awamu&lt;br /&gt;Tsuki no naki yo wa&lt;br /&gt;Omoiokite&lt;br /&gt;Mune hashiri hi ni&lt;br /&gt;Kokoro yakeori''
** This night of no moon&lt;br /&gt;There is no way to meet him.&lt;br /&gt;I rise in longing—&lt;br /&gt;My breast pounds, a leaping flame,&lt;br /&gt;My heart is consumed in fire.
*** p. 78

* ''Omoitsutsu&lt;br /&gt;Nureba ya hito no&lt;br /&gt;Mietsuramu&lt;br /&gt;Yume to shiriseba&lt;br /&gt;Samezaramashi wo''
** Thinking about him&lt;br /&gt;I slept, only to have him&lt;br /&gt;Appear before me—&lt;br /&gt;Had I known it was a dream,&lt;br /&gt;I should never have wakened.
*** p. 78

* ''Wabinureba&lt;br /&gt;Mi wo ukigusa no&lt;br /&gt;Ne wo taete&lt;br /&gt;Sasou mizu araba&lt;br /&gt;Inamu to zo omou''
** So lonely am I&lt;br /&gt;My body is a floating weed&lt;br /&gt;Severed at the roots.&lt;br /&gt;Were there water to entice me,&lt;br /&gt;I would follow it, I think.
*** p. 79

==={{w|Kenneth Rexroth}}'s translations===
==== ''One Hundred Poems from the Japanese'' (1955)====
:&lt;small&gt;''One Hundred Poems from the Japanese'', trans. Kenneth Rexroth (New Directions Publishing, 1955), {{ISBN|978-0811201810}}&lt;/small&gt;

* Imperceptible&lt;br /&gt;It withers in the world,&lt;br /&gt;This flower-like human heart.
** p. 46

====''One Hundred More Poems from the Japanese'' (1976)====
:&lt;small&gt;''One Hundred More Poems from the Japanese'', trans. Kenneth Rexroth (New Directions Publishing, 1976), {{ISBN|978-0811206198}}&lt;/small&gt;

* ''Yumeji ni wa&lt;br /&gt;Ashi mo yasumezu&lt;br /&gt;Kayoedo mo&lt;br /&gt;Utsutsu ni hitome&lt;br /&gt;Misbigoto wa arazu''
** Following the roads&lt;br /&gt;Of dream to you, my feet&lt;br /&gt;Never rest. But one glimpse of you&lt;br /&gt;In reality would be&lt;br /&gt;Worth all these many nights of love.
*** p. 33

* ''Hito ni awan&lt;br /&gt;Tsuki no naki ni wa&lt;br /&gt;Omoiokite&lt;br /&gt;Mune hashiribi ni&lt;br /&gt;Kokoro yakeori''
** You do not come&lt;br /&gt;On this moonless night.&lt;br /&gt;I wake wanting you.&lt;br /&gt;My breasts heave and blaze.&lt;br /&gt;My heart burns up.
*** p. 34

==== ''Women Poets of Japan'' (1982)====
:&lt;small&gt;''Women Poets of Japan'', trans. Kenneth Rexroth with Ikuko Atsumi (New Directions Publishing, 1982), {{ISBN|978-0811208208}}&lt;/small&gt;

* I fell asleep thinking of him,&lt;br /&gt;and he came to me.&lt;br /&gt;If I had known it was only a dream&lt;br /&gt;I would never have awakened.
** p. 14

* Although I come to you constantly&lt;br /&gt;over the roads of dreams,&lt;br /&gt;those nights of love&lt;br /&gt;are not worth one waking touch of you.
** p. 15

* He does not come.&lt;br /&gt;Tonight in the dark of the moon&lt;br /&gt;I wake wanting him.&lt;br /&gt;My breasts heave and blaze.&lt;br /&gt;My heart chars.
** p. 15

==={{w|Helen Craig McCullough}}'s translations===
====''Kokin Wakashū: The First Imperial Anthology of Japanese Poetry'' (1985)====
:&lt;small&gt;''{{w|Kokin Wakashū}}: The First Imperial Anthology of Japanese Poetry'', trans. Helen Craig McCullough (Stanford University Press, 1985), {{ISBN|978-0804712583}}&lt;/small&gt;

* ''Hana no iro wa&lt;br /&gt;utsurinikeri na&lt;br /&gt;itazura ni&lt;br /&gt;wa ga mi yo ni furu&lt;br /&gt;nagame seshi ma ni
** Alas! The beauty&lt;br /&gt;of the flowers has faded&lt;br /&gt;and come to nothing,&lt;br /&gt;while I have watched the rain,&lt;br /&gt;lost in melancholy thought.
*** p. 35
&lt;!--** &lt;small&gt;Translator's note: «Almost every noun and verb in the poem has at least two potentially relevant meanings:&lt;br /&gt;''hana'': flower; feminine beauty&lt;br /&gt;''iro'': color; circumstances, situation; beauty; sexual passion&lt;br /&gt;''utsuru'' (dictionary form of ''utsurinikeri''): scatter; fade; change&lt;br /&gt;''yo'': world; life; relations between the sexes; with ''ni'', extremely&lt;br /&gt;''furu'': fall (as of rain). The verb can also be construed as the attributive form of ''fu'', go through life, spend time, or of ''furu'', get old.&lt;br /&gt;''nagame su'' (dictionary form of ''nagame seshi''): rain a long time; stare pensively into space&lt;br /&gt;We can make the poem purely seasonal by treating ''wa ga mi'' (&quot;I,&quot; &quot;my person,&quot; &quot;my body&quot;) and ''yo ni'' as a semantically unrelated ''jo'' introducing ''furu'': &quot;Alas! The flowers have bloomed in vain [i.e., unobserved] and scattered during these long rains.&quot; Alternatively, we can translate the first three lines as &quot;The situation as regards my beauty [or youth] is that it has passed to no avail [i.e., I have been unlucky in love].&quot; [...] [The last line] can mean either &quot;while long rains fell&quot; or &quot;while I was lost in pensive thought.&quot; There are, consequently, numerous possible combinations [...]. But to choose a single one is to run the risk of losing the overtones so beautifully abundant in the original—on the one hand, the rich Chinese literary associations of the lonely lady in springtime, and on the other, the implied comparisons between the flowering tree and the woman's youth (two especially poignant examples of the transitoriness of beauty), between human sorrow and the dark moods of nature, and between rain and tears. Komachi's poem is neither metaphorical nor symbolic; rather, it is wordplay of the highest order, with almost every word functioning to some extent as engo; and we must interpret it accordingly if we are to avoid violation of its artistic integrity.» Source: ''Brocade by Night'' (Stanford University Press, 1985), p. 223.&lt;/small&gt;--&gt;

* ''Aki no yo mo&lt;br /&gt;na nomi narikeri&lt;br /&gt;au to ieba&lt;br /&gt;koto zo to mo naku&lt;br /&gt;akenuru mono o''
** Autumn nights, it seems,&lt;br /&gt;are long by repute alone:&lt;br /&gt;scarcely had we met&lt;br /&gt;when morning's first light appeared,&lt;br /&gt;leaving everything unsaid.
*** p. 142

* ''Iro miede&lt;br /&gt;utsurou mono wa&lt;br /&gt;yo no naka no&lt;br /&gt;hito no kokoro no&lt;br /&gt;hana ni zo arikeru''
** So much I have learned:&lt;br /&gt;the blossom that fades away,&lt;br /&gt;its color unseen,&lt;br /&gt;is the flower in the heart&lt;br /&gt;of one who lives in this world.
*** p. 174

* ''Wabinureba&lt;br /&gt;mi o ukikusa no&lt;br /&gt;ne o taete&lt;br /&gt;sasou mizu araba&lt;br /&gt;inamu to zo omou''
** In this forlorn state&lt;br /&gt;I find life dreary indeed:&lt;br /&gt;if a stream beckoned,&lt;br /&gt;I would gladly cut my roots&lt;br /&gt;and float away like duckweed.
*** p. 206

==Quotes about Komachi==
* Her beauty may be legendary but her rank as one of the greatest erotic poets in any language is not.
** Kenneth Rexroth and Ikuko Atsumi, ''The Burning Heart: Women Poets of Japan'' (New York: Seabury Press, 1977), p. 141

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}
* {{commons-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ono no, Komachi}}
[[Category:9th century births]]
[[Category:Poets from Japan]]
[[Category:Japanese women]]</text>
      <sha1>g79d2iqkqmenrpk707y8epjwuvqaaua</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>On Action at a Distance</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>200777</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965121</id>
      <parentid>3732126</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:06:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39681-46</username>
        <id>3350148</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965121</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="25258" sha1="pub8r2n1x5wdfaqrnmaxjiq6gn7o45j" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Finite Length Solenoid field radius 1 length 1.jpg|thumb|{{center/s}}{{w|Solenoid}} [[w:Field (physics)|Field]] Density&lt;br /&gt;by color &amp;nbsp; &amp;nbsp; &amp;nbsp;{{center/e}}]]
[[File:VFPt Solenoid correct2.svg|thumb|{{center/s}}{{w|Solenoid}} &amp; {{w|Magnetic field}} [[w:Line of force|lines]]{{center/e}}]]
'''On Action at a Distance''', is an article by [[James Clerk Maxwell]] which appeared in ''[[w:Nature (journal)|Nature]]'' (Mar 6, 1873) Vol VII, [[On Action at a Distance#External links|Issue 175.]] It was also published, with minor changes, both in the ''Proceedings of the {{w|Royal Institution}} of Great Britain'' Vol. VII. 1876, and in Vol. 2, ''The Scientific Papers of James Clerk Maxwell'' in 1890. The article is a discussion of scientific and mathematical investigations relating to the concepts of {{w|action at a distance}}, [[Michael Faraday]]'s [[w:Line of force|lines of force]], and the [[luminiferous aether]]. Maxwell was personally responsible for much of the related research.

== Quotes ==

* I must ask you to go over very old ground, and to turn your attention to a question which has been raised again and again ever since man began to think.

* '''The question is that of the transmission of force.''' We see two bodies at a distance from each other exert a mutual influence on each other's motion. '''Does this mutual action depend on the existence of some third thing, some medium of communication''', occupying the space between the bodies, or do the bodies act on each other immediately, without the intervention of anything else?

* The mode in which [[Michael Faraday|Faraday]] was accustomed to look at phenomena of this kind differs from that adapted by many modern inquirers, and '''my special aim will be to enable you to place yourselves at Faraday's point of view, and to point out the scientific value of that conception of ''[[w:Line of force|lines of force]]'' which, in his hands, became the key to the science of electricity.''' ...

* Why... should we not admit that the familiar mode of communicating motion by pushing and pulling... is the type and exemplification of all action between bodies, even in case in which we can observe nothing between...

* Here for instance is a kind of attraction which [[w:Frederick Guthrie|Professor Guthrie]] has made us familiar. A disk is set in vibtration, and is then brought near a light suspended body, which immediately begins to move towards the disk as if by an invisible cord. ...[[William Thomson, 1st Baron Kelvin|Sir W. Thomson]] has pointed out that in a moving fluid the pressure is least where the velocity is greatest. The velocity of the vibratory motion of the air is greatest near the disk. Hence the pressure of the air on the suspended body is less on the side nearest the disk... the body yields to the greater pressuire, and moves toward the disk.&lt;br /&gt;The disk, therefore, does not act where it is not. It sets the air next to it in motion by pushing it, this motion is communicated to more and more distant portions of the air in turn, and thus the pressure on opposite sides of the suspended body rendered unequal, and it moves toward the disk in consequence of excess pressure. '''The force is therefore the force of the old school—a case of ''vis a tergo''—a shove from behind.'''

* The advocates of the doctrine of action at a distance, however... say... Do we not see an instance of action at a distance in the case of a magnet... Besides this, '''[[w:Newton's law of universal gravitation|Newton's law of gravitation]]... asserts not only that the heavenly bodies act ... across immense intervals of space'''... on one another with precisely the same force as if the strata beneath which each is buried [were] non-existant. If any medium takes part... it must surely make some difference whether the space... contains nothing but this medium, or whether it is occupied by the dense matter of the earth or of the sun.

* '''But the advocates... maintain''' that even when the action is apparently the pressure of contiguous portions of matter... '''that a space ''always'' intervenes between...  that'''  so far from '''action at a distance''' being impossible, it '''is the only kind of action which ever occurs''', and that the favorite old ''vis a tergo''... exists only in the imagination of schoolmen.

* The best way to prove that when one body pushes another it does not touch it, is to measure the distance between... '''Here are two glass lenses, one of which is pressed against another'''... By means of an electric light... a series of [[w:Newton's rings|coloured rings]] is formed on the screen... first observed and first explained by Newton. The particular colour of any ring depends on the distance between the surfaces... '''[W]hat we call optical contact is not real contact. Optical contact indicates only that the distance between... is much less than a wavelength'''... Now it is possible to bring two pieces of glass so close together, that... they will adhere together so firmly, that when torn asunder the glass will break... Thus... bodies begin to press against each other whilst still at a measurable distance, and that '''even when pressed together with great force they are not in absolute contact'''...&lt;br /&gt;Why, then, say the advocates... should we continue to maintain the doctrine, founded only in the rough experience of a pre-scientific age, that matter cannot act where it is not, instead of admitting that all... contact essential to action were in reality cases of action at a distance... too small to be measured...

* [A]s for those who introduce ætherial, or other media... without any direct evidence... or any clear understanding of how the media work... the less these men talk about  their philosophical scruples about admitting action at a distance the better.

* '''The progress of science in [[Isaac Newton|Newton]]'s time consisted in getting rid of the celestial machinery with which generations of astronomers had encumbered the heavens, and thus &quot;sweeping cobwebs off the sky.&quot;&lt;br /&gt;Though the planets had already got rid of their [[w:Celestial spheres|crystal spheres]], they were still swimming in the vortices of [[René Descartes|Descartes]]. Magnets were surrounded by effluvia, and electrified bodies by atmospheres, the properties of which resembled in no respect those of ordinary effluvias and atmospheres.'''

* '''When [[Isaac Newton|Newton]] demonstrated''' that '''the force which acts on each of the heavenly bodies''' depends on its relative position with respect to the other bodies, '''the new theory met with violent opposition by the advanced philosophers... who described the doctrine of gravitation as a return to the exploded method of explaining everything by occult causes, attractive virtues, and the like.&lt;br /&gt;Newton... answered that he made no pretence of explaining the mechanism'''... To determine the mode in which their mutual action depends on their relative positions was a great step in science, and this Newton asserted he had made.

* But '''so far was [[Isaac Newton|Newton]] from asserting that bodies really act... over a distance''', independently of anything in between them, '''that in a letter''' to [[Richard Bentley|Bentley]]... quoted by [[Michael Faraday|Faraday]]... '''he says:—&quot;It is inconceivable that inanimate brute matter should, without the mediation of something else, which is not material, operate upon and affect other matter without mutual contact''', as it must do if gravitation, in the sense of [[Epicurus]], be essential and inherent in it... That gravity should be innate, inherent, and essential to matter, so '''that one body can act upon another at a distance, through a vacuum, without the mediation of anything else, by and through which their action and force may be conveyed from one to another, is to me so great an absurdity, that I believe that no man who has in philosophical matters a competent faculty of thinking can ever fall into it.&quot;'''

* Accordingly, we find in his ''[[w:Opticks#The Queries|Optical Queries]]'', and in his letters to [[Robert Boyle|Boyle]], that '''[[Isaac Newton|Newton]] had very early made the attempt to account for gravitation by means of the pressure of a medium''', and that '''the reason he did not publish''' these investigations &quot;proceeded from hence only, that he found '''he was not able, from experiment and observation, to give a satisfactory account of this medium, and the manner of its operation''' in producing the chief phenomena of nature.&quot;

* '''The doctrine of direct action at a distance... was first asserted by {{w|Roger Cotes}}''', in his preface to the ''[[w:Philosophiæ Naturalis Principia Mathematica|Principia]]''... According to Cotes, it is by experience that we learn that all bodies gravitate. We do not learn in any other way that they are extended, movable, or solid. Gravitation, therefore, has as much right to be considered an essential property of matter...

* And '''when the Newtonian philosophy gained ground in Europe, it was the opinion of [[w:Roger Cotes|Cotes]] rather than that of [[Isaac Newton|Newton]] that became most prevalent, till at last [[Roger Joseph Boscovich|Boscovich]] propounded his theory''', that matter is a [[wiktionary:congeries#Noun|congeries]] of mathematical points, each endowed with the power of attracting or repelling the others according to fixed laws. '''In his world, matter is unextended, and contact is impossible.''' He did not forget, however, to endow his mathematical points with [[inertia]].

* '''[I]t was most essential that''' Newton's method should be extended to every branch of science to which it was applicable—that '''we should investigate the forces with which bodies act on each other... before attempting to explain ''how'' that force is transmitted.''' No men could be better fitted to apply themselves to the first part of the problem, than those who considered the second part quite unnecessary.

* '''Accordingly, [[Henry Cavendish|Cavendish]], [[Charles-Augustin de Coulomb|Coulomb]], and [[Siméon Denis Poisson|Poisson]], the founders of the exact sciences of electricity and magnetism, paid no regard to those old notions of &quot;magnetic effluvia&quot; and &quot;electric atmospheres,&quot; which had been put forth in the previous century, but turned their undivided attention to the determination of the law of force''', according to which electrified and magnetized bodies attract or repel each other. In this way the true laws of these actions were discovered... by '''men who never doubted that the action took place at a distance, without the intervention of any medium''', and who would have regarded the discovery of such a medium as complicating rather than as explaining the undoubted phenomena of attraction.

* We have now arrived at the great discovery of [[Hans Christian Ørsted|Örsted]] of the connection between electricity and magnetism, '''Örsted found that an electric current acts on a magnetic pole, but that it neither attracts nor repels it, but causes it to move round the current.''' He expressed this by saying that &quot;the electric conflict acts in a revolving manner.&quot;&lt;br /&gt;The most obvious deduction from this new fact was that '''the action of the current on the magnet is not a push-and-pull force, but a rotary force, and accordingly many minds were set a-speculating on vortices and streams of æther whirling round the current.'''

* But [[André-Marie Ampère|Ampère]], by a combination of mathematical skill with experimental ingenuity, first proved that two electric currents act on one another, and then analysed this action as a result of a system of push-and-pull forces between the elementary parts of these currents.&lt;br /&gt;The formula of Ampère, however, is of extreme complexity, as compared with Newton's law of gravitation, and many attempts have been made to resolve it into something of greater apparent simplicity.

* Let us turn to the independent method of investigation employed by [[Michael Faraday|Faraday]] in those researches in electricity and magnetism which have made this Institution one of the most venerable shrines of science.&lt;br /&gt;No man ever more conscientiously and systematically laboured to improve all his powers of mind than did Faraday from the very beginning of his scientific career. But whereas the general course of scientific method then consisted in the application of the ideas of mathematics and astronomy to each new investigation in turn, '''Faraday seems to have had no opportunity of acquiring a technical knowledge of mathematics''', and his knowledge of astronomy was mainly derived from books.&lt;br /&gt;Hence, '''though he had a profound respect for the great discovery of [[Isaac Newton|Newton]], he regarded the attraction of gravitation as a sort of sacred mystery''', which, as he was not an astronomer, he had no right to [[wiktionary:gainsay#Verb|gainsay]] or to doubt, his duty being to believe it in the exact form in which it was delivered to him. Such a dead faith was not likely to lead him to explain new phenomena by means of direct attractions.&lt;br /&gt;Besides this, the treatises of [[Siméon Denis Poisson|Poisson]] and [[André-Marie Ampère|Ampère]] are of so technical a form, that to derive any assistance from them the student must have been thoroughly trained in mathematics, and it is very doubtful is such a training can be begun with advantage in mature years.

* Thus '''Faraday''', with his penetrating intellect, his devotion to science, and his opportunities for experiments, '''was debarred from following the course of thought which had led to the achievements of the French philosophers, and was obliged to explain the phenomena to himself by means of a symbolism which he could understand''', instead of adapting what had hitherto been the only tongue of the learned.

* '''This new symbolism consisted of''' those '''[[w:Line of force|lines of force]]''' extending themselves in every direction from electrified and magnetic bodies, '''which Faraday''' in his mind's eye '''saw as distinctly as the solid bodies from which they eminated.'''

* '''The idea of lines of force and their exhibition by means of iron filings was nothing new.''' They had been observed repeatedly, and investigated mathematically as an interesting curiosity of science. But let us hear Faraday himself...&lt;br /&gt;&quot;It would be a voluntary and unnecessary abandonment of most valuable aid if an experimentalist, who chooses to consider magnetic power as represented by lines of magnetic force, were to deny him the use of magnetic filings. By their employment he may make many conditions of the power, even in complicated cases, visible to the eye at once, may trace the varying direction of the lines of force and determine the relative polarity, may observe in which direction the power is increasing or diminishing, and in complex systems may determine the neutral points, or places where there is neither polarity nor power, even when they exist in the midst of powerful magnets. By their use probable results may be seen at once, and many a valuable suggestion gained for future leading experiments.&quot;

* ''Experiment on Lines of Force''. In this experiment each filing becomes a little magnet. The poles of opposite names belonging to different filings attract each other and stick together, and more filings attach themselves to the exposed poles, that is, to the ends of the row of filings. In this way the filings, instead of forming a confused system of dots over the paper, draw together, filing to filing, till long fibres of filings are formed, which indicate by their direction the lines of force in every part of the field.

* '''The mathematicians saw in this experiment nothing but a method of exhibiting at one view the direction in different places of the resultant two forces''', one directed to each pole of the magnet; a somewhat complicated result of a simple law of force.

* '''But Faraday''', by a series of steps as remarkable for their geometrical definiteness as for their speculative ingenuity, '''imparted to his conception of these lines of force a clearness and precision far in advance of that with which the mathematicians could then invest their new formulæ.'''

* Faraday's lines of force are not to be considered merely as individuals, but as forming a system, drawn in space in a definite manner so that '''the number of lines which pass through an area''', say of one square inch, '''indicates the intensity of the force''' acting through the area. Thus the lines of force become definite in number. The strength of a magnetic pole is measured by the number of lines which proceed from it; '''the electro-tonic state of a circuit is measured by the number of lines which pass through it.'''

* '''[E]ach individual line has a continuous existence in space and time.''' When a piece of steel becomes a magnet, or when an electric current begins to flow, the lines of force do not start into existence each in its own place, but '''as the strength increases new lines are developed within the magnet or current, and gradually grow outwards, so that the whole system expands from within, like {{w|Newton's rings}} in our former experiment.'''

* Thus '''every line of force preserves its identity during the whole course of its existence, though its shape and size may be altered to any extent.'''

* '''[E]very question relating to the forces acting on magnets or currents, or to the induction of currents in conducting circuits, may be solved by the consideration of Faraday's lines of force.''' In this place they can never be forgotten. '''By means of this new symbolism, Faraday defined''' with mathematical precision '''the whole theory of electro-magnetism, in language free from mathematical technicalities, and applicable to the most complicated and simplest cases.'''

* '''He observed that the motion which the magnetic and electric force tends to produce is invariably such a to shorten the lines of force and allow them to spread out laterally from each other. He thus preserved in the medium a state of stress, consisting of a tension, like that of a rope, in the direction of the lines of force, combined with a pressure in all directions at right angles to them.'''

* This is quite a new conception of action at a distance, reducing it to a phenomenon of the same kind as that action at a distance which is exerted by means of the tension of ropes and the pressure of rods.

* '''When the muscles of our bodies are excited... the fibres tend to shorten themselves and at the same time expand laterally. A state of stress is produced in the muscle, and the limb moves.''' This explanation of muscular action is by no means complete...

* '''For similar reasons we may regard Faraday's conception of a state of stress in the electro-magnetic field''' as a method of '''explaining action''' at a distance '''by means of the continuous transmission of force, even though we do not know how the state of stress is produced.'''

* '''[O]ne of Faraday's most pregnant discoveries, that of the magnetic rotation of [[w:Polarization (waves)|polarised]] light''', enables us to proceed... '''Of two circularly polarised rays of light''', precisely similar in configuration, but rotating in opposite directions, '''that ray is propagated with greater velocity which rotates in the same direction as the electricity of the magnetizing current.'''

* It follows... as [[William Thomson, 1st Baron Kelvin|Sir W. Thomson]] has shewn by strict dynamical reasoning, that the medium when under the action of magnetic force must be in a state of rotation... [i.e.,] that small portions of the medium, which we may call molecular vortices, are rotating, each on its own axis, the direction of this axis being that of the magnetic force.

* Here, then, '''we have an explanation of the tendency of the lines of magnetic force to spread out laterally and to shorten themselves. It arises from the {{w|centrifugal force}} of the molecular vortices.'''

* We have thus found that there are several different kinds of work to be done by the electro-magnetic medium if it exists. We have also seem that magnetism has an intimate relation to light, and we know that there is a theory of light which supposes it to consist of the vibrations of a medium. How is this luminiferous medium related to our electro-magnetic medium?

* [E]lectro-magnetic measurements have been made from which '''we can calculate by dynamical principles the velocity of propagation of small magnetic disturbances in the supposed electro-magnetic medium.'''&lt;br /&gt;This velocity is great, '''from 288 to 314 millions of metres per second... Now the velocity of light, according to [[Léon Foucault|Foucault]]'s experiments, is 298'''... But if the luminiferous and the electro-magnetic media occupy the same place, and transmit disturbances at the same velocity, what reason have we to distinguish the one from the other? By considering them as the same, we avoid at least the reproach of filling space twice over with different kinds of æther.

* '''[T]he only kind of electro-magnetic disturbance which can be propagated through a non-conducting medium is a disturbance transverse to the direction of propagation, agreeing... with''' what we know about that disturbance which we call '''light.'''

* '''[T]he electro-magnetic theory of light will agree in every respect with the undulatory theory, and the work of [[Thomas Young (scientist)|Thomas Young]] and [[Augustin-Jean Fresnel|Fresnel]] will be established on a firmer basis than ever, when joined with that of [[Henry Cavendish|Cavindish]] and [[Charles-Augustin de Coulomb|Coulomb]] by the key-stone of the combined sciences of light and electricity—[[Michael Faraday|Faraday]]'s great discovery of the electro-magnetic rotation of light.'''

* T'''he vast interplanetary and interstellar regions will no longer be regarded as waste places''' in the universe, which the Creator has seen fit to fill with the symbols of the manifest order of His kingdom. '''We shall find them to be already full of this wonderful medium; so full''', that no human power can remove it from the smallest portion of space, or produce the slightest flaw '''in its infinite continuity.''' It extends unbroken from star to star; '''and when a molecule of hydrogen vibrates in the [[w:Sirius|dog-star]], the medium receives the impulses''' of these vibrations; '''and''' after carrying it in its immense bosom for three years, '''delivers them in due course, regular order, and full tale into the [[w:Optical spectrometer|spectroscope]] of [[w:William Huggins|Mr Huggins]]''', at {{w|Tulse Hill}}.

* '''But the medium has other functions and operations''' besides bearing light from man to man, and from world to world, and giving evidence of the absolute unity of the metric system of the universe. '''Its minute parts may have rotatory as well as vibratory motions''', and the axis of rotation form those lines of magnetic force which extend in unbroken continuity into regions which no eye has seen, and '''which, by their action on our magnets, are telling us''' in language not yet interpreted, '''what is going on in the hidden underworld''' from minute to minute and from century to century.

* '''And these lines''' must not be regarded as mere mathematical abstractions. They '''are the directions in which the medium is exerting a tension''' like that of a rope, or rather, like that of our own muscles. The tension of the medium '''in the direction of the earth's magnetic force''' is in this country one grain weight on eight square feet. In some of [[James Prescott Joule|Dr Joule]]'s experiments, the medium has exerted a  tension of 200 lbs. per square inch.

* '''But the medium''', in virtue of the very same elasticity by which it is able to transmit undulations of light, '''is also able to act as a spring. When properly wound up''', it exerts a tension, different from the magnetic tension, by which '''it draws oppositely electrified bodies together, produces effects through the length of telegraph wires, and when of sufficient intensity, leads to the rupture and explosion called [[lightning]].'''

* '''These are some of the already discovered properties of that which has been called [[vacuum]], or nothing at all.''' They enable us to resolve several kinds of action at a distance into actions between contiguous parts of a continuous substance. '''Whether this resolution is of the nature of explication or complication, I must leave to the metaphysicians.'''

== See also ==
* [[Electromagnetism]]
* [[History of science]]
* [[Light]]
* [[Luminiferous aether]]
* [[James Clerk Maxwell]]
* [[Principle of locality]]

== External links ==
* [https://www.nature.com/articles/007341f0 &quot;On Action at a Distance&quot;] ''Nature'' (Mar 6, 1873) volume 7, pp. 341–343.
* @GoogleBooks
** &quot;On Action at a Distance&quot;, ''The Scientific Papers of James Clerk Maxwell'' (1890) [https://books.google.com/books?id=lzlRAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA311 pp. 311-323.]
** &quot;On Action at a Distance&quot; (1873) Royal Institution of Great Britain (snippet view only)
* The Secrets Persist: https://www.keepandshare.com/doc18/28768/forcefields-pdf-89k?da=y
[[Category:Physics]]</text>
      <sha1>pub8r2n1x5wdfaqrnmaxjiq6gn7o45j</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Free Birds</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>203415</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965267</id>
      <parentid>3964713</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:08:44Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Vanguard Man</username>
        <id>3294029</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <origin>3965267</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17806" sha1="cjdv4t3ghn3jg5eeb2rgu3exm6ovgkt" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Free Birds}}''''' is a 2013 American animated [[w:Thanksgiving|Thanksgiving]] [[w:Science fiction comedy|science fiction comedy]] film starring the voices of [[Owen Wilson]], [[Woody Harrelson]] and [[Amy Poehler]]. The movie's about two turkeys going back in time to the first [[Thanksgiving]] to get turkeys off the menu. It was produced by [[w:Reel FX Creative Studios|Reel FX Creative Studios]] as its first theatrical fully animated feature film. The film was released on November 1, 2013, by [[w:Relativity Media|Relativity Media]]. The film received negative reviews from critics and earned $110,000,000 on a $55,000,000 budget. It has since gained a cult following.[7] The film was nominated for the Annie Award for Outstanding Achievement for Music in a Feature Production.
{{center|'''On Nov. 1 hang on to your nuggets'''{{small|([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}}}

==Dialogue==
:''The following film is a work of fiction. It is loosely based on historical events and is in no way meant to be historically accurate. Except for the talking turkeys. That part is totally real.''
:'''Reggie (voice-over)''': Holidays, the whole world loves them. ''[chuckles]'' That's why there are so many. ''(Includes, New Years. Halloween.)'' Christmas. Easter. Hanukkah. The one thing they all have in common... food, like Thanksgiving. That's what it's all about. A time to sit down over the holiday meal. ''[a family is having a Thanksgiving Dinner with a roasted Turkey]'' It's everyone's favorite part. ''[unknown to the family, they are being watched by a horrified domestic turkey named Reggie]'' Unless of course, you are the meal.
:'''Reggie''': ''[screams in horror to see the farmer cutting up the Turkey, pants, then, resumes screaming]''
:'''Reggie (voice-over)''': My name is Reggie, by the way. ''[Reggie in reality continues to scream in fear]'' I'm the turkey screaming for his life.
:'''Reggie''': Ah! Ah! ''[runs back to the farm]''
:'''Reggie (voice-over)''': Thanksgiving is a turkey's ''(number 1)'' worst nightmare. And trust me, I've tried to warn them.     
:''[Reggie in reality hops on a fence post]''     
:'''Reggie''': You don't get it! They're fattening us up so they can eat us!     
:''[the turkeys are wandering around the farm, being dimwits]''     
:'''Turkey 1''': It's such a beautiful day. 
:'''Turkey 2''': This is the best day ever!     
:'''Turkey 1''': Probably the best day of my life.     
:'''Turkey 3''': Hey, corn!     
:'''All Turkeys''': CORN!!!
:'''Reggie (voice-over)''': And every year, they don't listen. I'm not gonna dress it up. Turkeys are dumb.     

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Elder Turkey''': Our world is made of corn. ''[grabs leaf]'' Leafy corn. ''[has corn in his wing]'' Corn corn. ''[waves his wing at sun]'' Fire corn!
:'''Reggie''': That's an awesome theory, but I think they actually call that the Sun.
:'''Elder Turkey''': ''[pauses]'' Out. '''Out!'''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Jake''': ''[sternly]'' Whatever you do, do not make a sound. ''[removes the bag from Reggie to see him]''
:'''Reggie''': ''[screams to see Jake as Jake shuts his beak]''
:'''Jake''': Shh... I'm Jake from the TFF. That's Turkey Freedom Front. You've just been recruited for a top-secret mission.
:''[Reggie gives Jake a confused stare for a second]''
:'''Reggie''': Ah! ''[runs off back to Camp David with Jake watching him]'' Help! I've been kidnapped by a wild turkey! Security, set tasers to kill! ''[Jake uses his own wing to stop Reggie, flinging him into the air]'' Ah! ''[Jake grabs the TV remote, as Reggie lands on his back]'' Oh. ''[2 security officers hears this from the distance]''
:'''Security Guard''': What was that? ''[looks around at the woods with flashlight, as Jake is stealthily hides behind a tree, the security head back inside]''
:'''Reggie''': ''[groans in pain]''
:'''Jake''': Love your enthusiasm, comrade. ''[grabs Reggie and pins on a tree]'' But you're running in the wrong direction. Besides, we're already behind schedule.
:'''Reggie''': ''[confused]'' We're behind schedule?
:'''Jake''': We are? Why didn't you say so? ''[grabs Reggie]'' Let's move!
:'''Reggie''': Look, I think you have me confused with somebody else. I'm not part of any mission.
:'''Jake''': Horizon seems clear. Hold on.
:'''Reggie''': Hey, wait! That's me! This is the pardoned turkey. Help me!
:'''Jake''': A strange rogue turkey. Stay back. I'll take him out. [  ]
:'''Reggie''': Please don't hurt me.
:'''Jake''': I don't know who you are but you're seriously jeopardizing this operation.
:'''Reggie''': Are you insane? It's me. ''[brief moment of silence]''
:'''Jake''': Is it? Is it really?
:'''Reggie''': Would you get off me?! ''[ ]'' You know what? I'm sick of you throwing me around. ''[draws a line in the dirt with his sharp toe nail &amp; points at with his feathered finger]'' You see this line? Do not come into my personal- ''[Jake slaps him in the face]'' Did you not see the line? 'Cause I was pretty clear that it's right- ''[Jake slaps his face 3 more times]''
:'''Jake''': Snap out of it, Reggie.
:'''Reggie''': ''[shocked &amp; confused]'' Wait, how do you know my name?
:'''Jake''': Because he told me everything about you.
:'''Reggie''': He? Who is he?
:'''Jake''': The Great Turkey. He appeared in the sky on a bright ball of light with a voice that came from everywhere. He gave me my mission, told me I needed to find you. And then, he gave me... this. ''[revealing a shiny golden doorknob in his wing to Reggie]''
:'''Reggie''': A doorknob?
:'''Jake''': The Sacred Time Knob.
:'''Reggie''': This guy is a lunatic.
:'''Jake''': That secret military base should be right up ahead. ''[ ]'' The facility should be in here. Just need to figure out how to get past this impenetrable gate. ''[Reggie sarcastically unlocks the gate with his feathered finger as Jake kicks the gate open, shoves Reggie in]'' So, this is what it looks like on the inside.
:'''Reggie''': Okay, what's inside this secret base, anyway? ''[bumps into Jake as he turns around to Reggie]''
:'''Jake''': A time machine. ''[thunder and lightning comes out]''
:'''Reggie''': A time machine?
:'''Jake''': A time machine. ''[thunder and lightning comes out again]''
:'''Reggie''': A time machine. 
:'''Jake''': A time- ''[thunder and lightning comes out, but stops as Jake realizes]''  What? Who told you that?
:'''Reggie''': You did, just now.
:'''Jake''': Of course, I did. I was testing you.
:'''Reggie''': Uhhh...
:'''Jake''': That's our mission. Not even to safe ten turkeys or even a hundred, but all of them. We're going back in time to the First Thanksgiving to get turkeys off the menu. ''[turns to probably break the fourth wall]'' That's right, we're going back in time to the First Thanksgiving to get turkeys off the menu. ''[Reggie leans to Jake]''
:'''Reggie''': Who are you talking to?
:'''Jake''': This guy right here. ''[points at his reflection on a hubcap tire of a military Jeep, Reggie frowns at him]'' He totally gets it. Look, look, see how he's nodding?

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Reggie''': Ow! What are you doing?
:'''Jake''': Tomorrow's Thanksgiving. We must attack the fort ''(and free those captured comrades)'' tonight.
:'''Reggie''': Ah! Oh! Ah! Ow! We shouldn't attack anything. ''(Even the fort. It'll risk the safety of the flock.)''
:'''Jake''': He told me we must do it together. 
:'''Reggie''': Oh! Give me a break. He? The Great Turkey? ''[sarcastically]'' Ooh! He's a voice inside your head. ''[Jake turns around to him, feeling insulted]'' 
:'''Jake''': How dare you. There is nothing inside my head. The Great Turkey is real. ''[Reggie shakes his head in annoyance]'' I saw him with my own two eyes. 
:'''Reggie''': The more you say that name, the dumber it sounds. I mean-- ''[Jake angrily grabs him in the neck]'' 
:'''Jake''': The Great Turkey is the greatest turkey that I know and you will never be as great as The Great Turkey who is the greatest... turkey.
:'''Reggie''': ''[chokingly]'' Okay. ''[Jake realizes and lets go of his neck]''
:'''Jake''': I'm sorry, Reggie. I didn't grow up on a nice free-range farm. ''[flashback]'' I grew up in a cold, clinical factory. From the time we were born, we were fattened up on formula. Except for me. My mother kept me hidden from the humans.
:'''Young Jake''': Is it time?
:'''Jake's Mom''': Yes, sweetie. Now, these eggs are our future, Jake. Take them and run and don't stop until you find a safe place to start a new flock. 
:'''Young Jake''': Mama, I'm scared.
:'''Jake''': I failed. I let down my family, and my flock. I decided I was better off going it alone where I could never hurt anyone again. Then, he arrived. The Great Turkey.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Ranger''': I knew he was a coward.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[the Chief sacrificing himself to save the flock when the pilgrim's attack. He's trapped underneath flaming debris and instructs his daughter to go without him]''
:'''Chief Broadbeak''': GO! Join the others!
:'''Jenny''': Not without you!
:'''Chief Broadbeak''': ''[softly]'' Jenny...
:'''Jenny''': Daddy!
:'''Chief Broadbeak''': I'll always be with you.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Jenny''': My father loved this flock. And he will always be a part of it. He gave his life to give us ours. ''[Reggie starts to leave out of guilt]'' So, we will honor him. ''[Reggie sadly looks back at Jenny]'' But right now, we need to do what we must to survive.
:'''Reggie''': ''[sadly]'' This is all my fault. ''[leaves]''
:'''Jenny''': They have taken our home. They've taken our family. ''[Jake realizes Reggie is gone]'' We have only one choice now. We will fight! We will stand and fight! This is our home! No more hiding! We will attack the fort, free our family and make our flock whole once again! Who's with me!?
:'''Ranger''': We fight!
:'''Danny''': We fight, brother! ''[the flock chants as Jake runs after Reggie, meanwhile Reggie sadly walks through the forest to get to STEVE]''
:'''STEVE''': Good morning, Reggie. Why the long face? That is a punch line from a joke.
:'''Reggie''': Just take me home.
:'''Jake''': Reggie, wait! The flock is in trouble!
:'''Reggie''': ''[angrily]'' Yup. ''(They are all in grave danger.)'' And you know why? Because of us! We didn't save anyone. We made everything worse.
:'''Jake''': But, Reggie, the Great Turkey told me—
:'''Reggie''': ''[angrily moves Jake's wings off of him]'' '''There is no Great Turkey!''' There is no mission. You made it all up in your head. It's all a lie. ''[Jake slumps]'' Now, I'm leaving, alright? Before we mess things up even more! And if you're smart, you'll come with me.
:'''Jake''': ''[close to tears]'' I can't give up.
:'''Reggie''': Yeah, if you're smart. ''[turns his back on Jake and enters STEVE sits on the  seat]'' Look who I'm talking to.
:''[STEVE and Reggie disappears back into the present, leaving the disheartened Jake behind]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Reggie''': ''[sighs in remorse as he goes back inside]'' See you later, STEVE.                    
:'''STEVE''': Goodbye, Reggie.
:''[Reggie sadly opens the door]''
:'''Reggie''': ''[gasps softly to see a Future Reggie]''
:'''Future Reggie''': Hey. ''(Hold on right there.)''
:'''Reggie''': ''[screams as he slams the door in fear trying to keep it shut]''                                                                                                      
:'''Future Reggie''': ''[inside the house]'' Hey, hey, hey! Wait! Wait!                                                  
:'''Reggie''': ''[strains to keep the door shut, but accidentally pulls the door knob off and sees his future self coming out]''
:'''Future Reggie''': Snap out of it Reggie, we don't have time for this.                                     
:'''Reggie''': Ah! ''[turns to run away with Future Reggie chasing him]''
:'''Future Reggie''': Hey! ''[tackles Reggie and gets him up]'' I'm breaking like 100 time travel rules, and this might destroy the universe, but I don't have a choice. I've come back from the future to tell you something really important.
:'''Reggie''': What is it? ''[brief pause]''
:'''Future Reggie''': You're an idiot.
:'''Reggie''': Whoa! That's a little harsh. I may not be a genius but...
:'''Future Reggie''': Everything you want is back in 1621. Jenny, Jake, a whole flock of friends.
:'''Reggie''': Yeah, a flock that I totally messed up. They're better off without me.
:'''Future Reggie 2''': No! ''[comes out of the bushes]''
:'''Reggie &amp; Future Reggie''': Ah! ''[jumps in surprise]''
:'''Future Reggie 2''': I've come from even farther in the future to tell you that Jenny and the flock are gonna attack the fort. They don't stand a chance.
:'''Reggie''': Oh, no. What do we do?
:'''Future Reggie''': We need a plan.
:'''Reggie''': Exactly. ''[the Sacred Time Knob shines in his wing]'' Whoa. The Sacred Time Knob.
:'''Future Reggie 2''': The Sacred Time Knob!
:'''Future Reggie''': The Sacred Time Knob: 
:'''Reggie''': ''[realizes]'' Wait.  
:'''Future Reggie 2''': Yeah?  
:'''Reggie''': You know what this means?
:'''Future Reggie''': What does it mean?  
:'''Reggie''': ''[laughs about the Sacred Time Knob]'' It's so simple. It means... I... need to go find The Great Turkey. I bet he's behind the door that this opens!  
:'''STEVE''': Oh, come on! ''[Reggie turns around to STEVE in confusion] You'' are The Great Turkey.  
:'''Reggie''': ''[amazed]'' I'm The Great Turkey?  
:'''Future Reggie 1 and 2''': ''You're'' The Great Turkey. ''[look at each other happily]''  
:'''Reggie''': Which means Jake was telling the truth the whole time? Wow, I really am an idiot!  
:'''Future Reggie''': I hate to say I told you so.  
:'''Reggie''': Wait, if I'm an idiot, then you're an idiot. ''[Future Reggie nods in agreement]''  
:'''Future Reggie 2''': No, no, guys, guys, guys, technically, we're all idiots. But we're also all...  
:'''All Reggies''': The Great Turkey!  
:'''Future Reggie''': My mind is being literally blown right now!  
:'''Future Reggie 3''': ''[comes out of the bushes]'' Mine, too!  
:'''All Reggies''': Ah!
:'''Future Reggie 3''': I came back to make sure we stop and appreciate just how awesome this is.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Jenny''': Where's Reggie?
:''[Jake saddened down]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Reggie''': Are you sure you won't stay here with the flock?
:'''Jake''': I'm a turkey of action, Reggie. 
:'''Reggie''': Well, I guess this is good-bye.
:'''Jake''': No, Reggie. Good-byes are just hellos, carried across the wind until our paths... intersect once again.
:'''Reggie''': That's beautiful… and confusing.
:'''Jake, Reggie, and Jenny''': ''[laugh as Jake hugs Reggie and pats him on the head when he starts to leave with STEVE]''
:'''Jake''': Wild, undomesticated turkeys of the past. I'll never forget you. ''[the flock, Reggie &amp; Jenny wave good-bye to Jake &amp; STEVE as Jake sits on the seat]''
:'''STEVE''': Where would you like to go, Jake?
:'''Jake''': Wherever we are needed, STEVE. Wherever we are needed. ''[Jake and STEVE leave as Reggie and Jenny watch]'' 
:'''Reggie''': ''[to Jenny]'' So, this is Turkey Paradise. ''[romantically kisses her, much to her amazement &amp; her left eye drops]''
:'''Jenny''': ''[sighs in amazement]'' Wow, you're moving pretty fast for a Pisces. Whatever that is.
:'''STEVE''': Oh my. ''[zaps into black]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[STEVE returns as quickly as he left]''
:'''Reggie''': Jake, what happened? You were only were gone like a second.
:'''Jake''': Actually, I've been gone for years. Have you heard about the turducken?
:''[Reggie and Jenny share a look of shock]''
:'''Chicken''': BAWK!
:'''Duck''': QUACK!

==Taglines==
* On Nov. 1, hang on to your nuggets
* The greatest turkey movie of all time.
* Changing the main course of history
* The Past Intersect

==Cast==
* [[Owen Wilson]] — Reggie
* [[Woody Harrelson]] — Jake
* [[Amy Poehler]] — Jenny
* [[w:George Takei|George Takei]] — Space Time Exploration Vehicle Envoy (STEVE)
* [[w:Colm Meaney|Colm Meaney]] — [[w:Myles Standish|Captain Standish]]
* [[w:Keith David|Keith David]] — Chief Broadbeak
* [[w:Dan Fogler|Dan Fogler]] — [[w:William Bradford (governor)|Governor Bradford]]
* [[w:Jimmy Hayward|Jimmy Hayward]] — Ranger, Leatherbeak, [[w:President of the United States|The President]], Hazmat #2
* [[w:Carlos Alazraqui|Carlos Alazraqui]] — Amos
* [[w:Kaitlyn Maher|Kaitlyn Maher]] — The President's Daughter
* Jeff Biancalana — General Sagan, Hazmat #1
* [[w:Danny Carey|Danny Carey]] — Danny
* [[w:Carlos Ponce|Carlos Ponce]] — Alejandro, Narrator
* [[w:Robert Beltran|Robert Beltran]] — [[w:Massasoit|Chief Massasoit]]
* [[w:Lesley Nicol (actress)|Lesley Nicol]] — Pilgrim Woman
* Jason Finazzo — Chrononaut One
* [[w:Scott Mosier|Scott Mosier]] — Pizza Dude
* [[w:Lauren Bowles|Lauren Bowles]] — Jake's Mom
* [[w:Dwight Howard|Dwight Howard]] — Cold Turkey
* [[w:Josh Lawson|Josh Lawson]] — Gus

===Additional Voices===
* Jeff Biancalana
* Jason Finazzo
* [[w:Jimmy Hayward|Jimmy Hayward]]
* [[w:Scott Mosier|Scott Mosier]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:2013 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2013 American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Thanksgiving films]]
[[Category:Animated films about birds]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Animated films about talking animals]]
[[Category:Animated films about artificial intelligence]]
[[Category:Animated films about time travel]]
[[Category:Animated films about death]]
[[Category:Films directed by Jimmy Hayward]]
[[Category:Films set in Maryland]]
[[Category:Films about animal rights]]</text>
      <sha1>cjdv4t3ghn3jg5eeb2rgu3exm6ovgkt</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Barney's Great Adventure</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>203982</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965021</id>
      <parentid>3963982</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:57:57Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-34111-93</username>
        <id>3339209</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965021</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="26857" sha1="rh3qfu7kv31exiknj10x14ea5l4i71c" xml:space="preserve">{{cleanup}}
'''''[[w:Barney's Great Adventure|Barney's Great Adventure]]''''' is a Canadian musical [[w:Comdey film|comedy]] adventure based on the [[w:Children's television series|children's television series]] ''[[Barney &amp; Friends]]'', featuring the character [[w:Barney the Dinosaur|Barney the Dinosaur]]. The film was written by [[w:Stephen White (television writer)|Stephen White]], directed by [[w:Steve Gomer|Steve Gomer]], produced by [[w:Sheryl Leach|Sheryl Leach]] and [[w:Lyrick Studios|Lyrick Studios]] and released by [[w:Universal Pictures|Universal Pictures]] from 2000 to 2021 and [[w:PolyGram Filmed Entertainment|PolyGram Filmed Entertainment]] from 1998 to 2000 in the United States and Canada at the height of Barney's popularity.
{{center|'''An adventure as big as your imagination.'''}}

== Barney the Dinosaur ==
* ''[evil groans]'' Huh? Oh, no!  ''No!'' I gotta get driving lessons. Oh, I'm fine. Wait for minute. I don't know.
* ''Oh, that's ring number four. Only one more to go.'' Come back! Please! You can't our egg! No!
* Right! Yes!
* Okay.
* We're gonna hit... the haystack!

* It's cracking.

== BJ ==

== Baby Bop ==
* ''Excuse me.'' Uh, I said excuse me! Oh, that's better. I'm looking for my blankie. It's this big, and it's ''really, really'' soft, and it's yellow. 

''[giggles]'' 

* Do you know where my blankie is? 
* Oh, well... uh, thank you. Okay, you can go on now.

* It's wiggling.

== Grandpa Greenfield ==
* Eliza... the kids are here. Shake a leg now.
* Much. Come on.
* Yes. Don't worry. Everything will be okay. Cody. Tiger. Come on.

== Grandma Greenfield==
* They're here? Oh, my goodness. George, do I look all right?
* George, what is it?
* My stars! What happened? All you all right?

==Dialogue==
:''[first lines]''
:'''Barney''': Oh, boy! It looks like everybody's here!
:'''B.J.:''': Oh, man, this is gonna be so cool!
:'''Baby Bop''': Oh, I can't wait to eat popcorn and sing along and... oh, and see the movie!
:''[All three of them laugh.]''
:'''Barney''': Well then, here we go!
:'''Baby Bop''': Roll 'em!
:''[The screen fades from black. During the song that plays throughout the opening credits, we see a green minivan drive through the countryside and the title kicks in. In the minivan, a dad drives, a mom looks at a map, a girl holds Barney (as a doll), another girl stitches lanyard, while a boy plays on his GameBoy, and a baby sits in his seat, silently.]''
:'''Marcella''': Are we there yet?
:'''Kate Newton''': Your turn.
:'''Colton Newton''': No, not yet, Marcella.
:'''Abigail &quot;Abby&quot; Newton''': Oh, it's taking too long!
:'''Cody Newton''': ''[annoyed, to Abigail]'' What's your hurry?? They're dumping us for a whole week!
:'''Colton''': Oh, come on, Cody, you're going to have a great time. You can help Grandpa with the farm chores, like, uh... &quot;milking the chickens!&quot;
:'''Others''': ''[laugh]''
:'''Cody''': Get the doll out of my face!
:''[Marcella takes the Barney doll out of Cody's face, just as she and Abby are about to say...]''
:'''Abby/Marcella''': Talk to the hand, 'cause the face ain't home, leave a message at the tone: beep! ''[both laugh: What they were going to say was &quot;Abby and Marcella can't come to the phone. Please leave a message after the beep... beep! If you are satisfied with your message, press one or hang up!&quot;]''
:'''Marcella''': Do you like dinosaurs?
:'''Cody''': What about them?
:'''Abby''': That's Barney!
:'''Cody''': I know, it's Barney. The ''whole world'' knows it's Barney, and he's a stuffed doll!
:'''Marcella''': You're wrong. Barney can walk and talk.
:'''Abby''': And sing! And dance!
:'''Colton''': Batteries not included.
:''[Laughter from Marcella, Abby and Kate]''
:'''Cody''': Sing and dance?
:'''Abby''': We use our imaginations.
:'''Cody''': Your imaginations? That's kid stuff!
:'''Abby''': That's all right - we ''are'' kids! ''[she laughs with Marcella as the family pass a street in the town of Merrivale. There's a sign above them reading &quot;Merrivale Apple Day Festival&quot;]''
:'''Colton''': Hey, look, Merrivale Apple Day Festival - parade, circus, hot air balloons, fireworks... wow!
:'''Abby''': It's tomorrow! Can Grandma and Grandpa bring us?
:'''Colton''': Um...
:'''Kate Newton''': Well, maybe, but don't count on it, okay?
:'''Cody''': Oh, great! The one ''good'' to do in town, and we'll probably miss it!
:'''Grandpa''': Delilah, the kids are here, shake a leg now!
:'''Grandma''': They're here? Oh, my goodness! Geroge.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The girls furrow their brows slightly, eyes closed, as they &quot;use their imaginations&quot;. Cody finds this amusing. Abby opens one eye long enough to give her brother a dirty look, then both girls redouble their efforts - eyes tightly shut, faces humorously scrunched.]''
:'''Cody''': Gee, ''no'' Barney? Maybe you're ''not'' trying hard ''enough''!
:''[From the GIRLS POV, we see Cody laughing. But behind him, as soon as they hear the shower turning on, all three kids react with surprise. Cody slowly turns around to look. We see a CLOSE UP of the bathtub's legs... as they VISIBLY BEND under immense weight! The girls open their eyes, slack-jawed, and the water turns off. A pregnant moment ticks by, and Cody s-l-o-w-l-y starts to reach for the curtain’s edge. Suddenly, a purple hand pulls back the curtain! We see BARNEY, still with some drops of water on him. Cody falls to the floor in surprise, and Marcella and Abby are amazed.]''
:'''Barney''': ''[jolly]'' A towel, please! ''[At this pedestrian request, the two girls smile... then begin to laugh. Cody remains stunned - his hand still outstretched. Barney starts to climb from the tub. CLOSE-UP of tub legs as they flex back up to normal position. Marcella grabs a BATH TOWEL and hands it to Barney.]'' Thank you, Marcella!
:'''Marcella''': ''[As Barney buffs himself dry with the towel, she says...]'' He knows my name.
:''[Barney notices that Cody is still standing with his arm outstretched... and nicely drapes the moist towel over it.]''
:'''Barney''': Oh, and thank you, Cody! It's so nice to have a shower after a long car trip. Now, what were we playing before, Abby?
:'''Abby''': We were playing a game of pretend, remember?
:'''Barney''': Oh, right! I just love to pretend.
:'''Marcella''': Hey, why don't we go play in the barn?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': Okay, &quot;Barney&quot;... you're really here, 'cause in ''my'' imagination... then you're about to disappear!
:'''Abby/Marcella''': Co-dy!
:''[Cody scrunches his eyes tightly shut.]''
:'''Cody''': I... do... ''not''... believe in you!
:''[Cody slowly opens his eyes. From Cody's POV, we see Marcella and Abby looking at him with faint annoyance. Barney is noticeably absent between them. Cody smiles with relief... then is suddenly startled when Barney leans into frame and puts a hand on Cody's shoulder! The two are practically nose to nose.]''
:'''Barney''': ''[Warm &amp; Significant]'' That's okay, Cody. ''[a beat]'' I believe in you...
:''[He chuckles as he gives Cody a Barney-sized hug.]''
:'''Cody''': ''[grumps]'' Barney the Dinosaur is ''not'' in this barn!
:''[That night, after dinner...]''
:'''Cody''': I'm telling you, Barney's in your barn.
:'''Grandma''': I know. Cody, you told us at dinner.
:'''Grandpa''': Several times.
:'''Cody''': Listen to me, Grandma, Grandpa. Barney the Dinosaur is in ''your'' barn! ( ''no audio'' ) ''Isn't he?''
:'''Abby''': Yeah!
:'''Marcella''': Barney likes your barn.
:'''Grandma''': Well, I'm glad he likes it. Marcella, don't leave your little doll out there all night.
:'''Cody''': Barney isn't just a little doll. He's very big. 
:'''Grandpa''': Oh, sure, he's big now, but you just wait. These fads come and go. 
:'''Grandma''': Now, Cody, I did not notice at the table... that someone ate like a dinosaur night. 
:'''Grandpa''': No! Handsome fellow like me have to be careful what I eat. Got to watch my figure. I don't want to lose my girlfriend. Cody, I first met your grandmother when I was about your age. We were childhood sweethearts. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grandma''': Come on, handsome, you help me with the dishes now.
:'''Grandpa''': Oh, gee, I'd like to but, uh, that dishwater makes my fingers all wrinkly. 
''[girls giggling]''
:'''Grandma''': That's fine. They'll just match your sweet wrinkly face. Come on.
:'''Grandpa''': Okay. Okay. Oh, and, Cody, you watch that barn for any more dinosaurs, okay? 
:'''Cody''': Funny. Real funny. 
:'''Marcella''': You tell him, Cody. Pretty night, huh?
:'''Abby''': Yeah!
:'''Marcella''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Barney''': It's beautiful!
:'''Cody''': Hey! Whoa!
:'''Barney''': Whoops!
:'''Cody''': Get me out of here, Barney!
''[girls giggling]''
:'''Barney''': Uh--uh, sorry!
:'''Cody''': Sure, you are.
:'''Marcella''': Oh, that was funny!
:'''Barney''': Where are your grandparents?
:'''Abby''': You just missed them.
:'''Barney''': Well, I'm sure I'll see them soon. 
:'''Cody''': Yeah, but will they see you?
:'''Marcella''': Barney, can you push us on the swing?
:'''Barney''': I'd be happy to.
:'''Marcella''': Cool!
:'''Barney''': Ralph, a little guitar music, please.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Abby''': Whoa, awesome finish!
:'''Barney''': Well, actually, I think it was a flea. 
:'''Marcella''': Come on, Barney, we're going to play in the attic. 
:'''Abby''': We're pretending it's a castle.
:'''Barney''': Oh, boy!
:'''Marcella''': I'm gonna be a princess.
:'''Abby''': I'm gonna be the knight.
:'''Barney''': Um... aren't you going to play, Cody?
:'''Cody''': What, some stupid pretend game? No way. Definitely not cool.
:'''Barney''': Oh, well, uh, what do you think ''is'' cool?
:'''Cody''': Rock singers who spit fire, professional wrestling--Real stuff.
:'''Barney''': Oh, I see. But, you know, Cody, even for grown-ups, the real adventures in life start with... a dream.
:'''Cody''': A dream? Prove it!
:'''Barney''': Oh, you can only prove it to yourself, Cody. But you could start, uh, mmm, ah, you could start by wishing on a star. 
:'''Cody''': A star? As if. Stars are only glowing balls of gas. a jillion miles from here.
:'''Barney''': Oh, but I think there's a very special wishing star in the sky tonight and it's right about there.
:'''Cody''': Whoa! What me to make a wish? I'll make a wish. I wish! I wish! I wish could have are real adventure this summer! Do things that no one else has done before! That would be cool! How's that for a wish, Barney? Barney? Barney? ( ''sighs'' ) Man, I must be losing it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': ''[sighs]'' Whoa!
''[pail shakes]''
:'''Cody''': What's going on?
''[Barney whimpering]''
:'''Barney''': Well! Uh, Um, To tell you the truth! I, Uh.
:'''Marcella''': Hey, maybe it'll Grandma will know.
:'''Abby''': Let's go ask her.
:'''Barney''': Oh, okay. ''[Cody spins Barney around then his farmer suit disappear back to himself again]'' Wait for me! ''[Barney runs out of the barn after the kids]''

''[footsteps running]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': Well, Barney has ''it''!
:'''Grandpa''': Right! Where's Barney?
:'''Cody''': I'll go find out! Make sure they ''don't'' go anywhere!
:'''Abby''': You have to see this egg.
:'''Marcella''': What bird lady?
:'''Grandma''': She's a birdwatcher, dear, and I think she knows everything and eggs and birds. Why don't you children go on over there?
:'''Cody''': Never mild. I'm taking ''you'' to see my grandparents right now.
:'''Barney''': Oh, well, good. Bye, Fig! I'll just, uh...
:'''Cody''': Oh, Grandma will be in a second, okay? Hey, wait for me!
:'''Abby''': We'll be needing this. 
:'''Cody''': What, where are you going?
:'''Abby''': To take the egg to Ms. Goldfinch! Hurry up!
:'''Barney''': Okay!
:'''Cody''': Wait! I want Grandma and Grandpa to see it right now!
:'''Barney''': Oh!
:'''Cody''': Grandma!

''[evil thunderclaps to at once]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': Come on, Agnes.
:'''Marcella''': Do we have much farther to go?
:'''Abby''': I don't think so.
:'''Cody''': I don't remember it looking like this last year.
:'''Marcella''': Maybe, we're lost.
:'''Abby''': Barney?
:''[Abby and Marcella, except Cody, shouted at Barney]''
:'''Barney''': Look what I found! ''[Barney moves the branch up and the swan sign said Goldfinch]'' That way.
:'''Cody''': There is no that way.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': Well, the egg will hatch, when all five of these rings light up. But it'll only hatch in the very spot where Cody it.
:'''Abby''': In the barn!
:'''Ms. Goldfinch''': Oh, Hovering hummingbirds, You're right! There's three more to go! Oh, you better get that egg back to the barn right away!
:'''Cody''': Oh, come on! You're dreaming if you think that--
:'''Ms. Goldfinch''': Cody, be careful!
:'''Barney''': Oh, no! 
:'''Marcella''': Oh, no! No, no!
:'''Abby''': No, no, no!
:'''Marcella''': No!
:'''Cody''': No, stop!
:'''Marcella''': No!
:'''Children''': No!
:'''Miss Goldfinch''': Go, go, go!
:'''Cody''': I'm taking the fast way!
:'''Mr. Millet''': See you, Miss Goldfinch!
:'''Barney''': No, wait, Mr. Millet, stop! You've got our egg!
:'''Girls''': Mr. Millet, stop! You've got our egg!
:'''Abby''': Don't let him get away!
:'''Marcella''': Stop, stop!
:'''Barney''': Oh, no! Mr. Millet!
:'''Cody''': Come back here, Mr. Millet! Come on, let's get on a horse and go!
:'''Abby''': But we can't all ride on Agnes!

''[crowd cheering]''

:'''Baby Bop''': ''Excuse me.'' Uh, I said excuse me! 

''[cheering stops]''

:'''Baby Bop''': Oh, that's better. I'm looking for my blankie. It's big, and it's ''really, really'' soft and it's yellow. ''[giggles]'' Do you know where my blankie is?
:'''All Crowd''': No, we don't!
:'''Baby Bop''': Oh, well... uh, thank you. Okay, you can go on now.

''[crowd cheers']''

:'''Barney''': Mr. Millet, Mr. Millet! Stop!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Abby''': Oh, I can't look!
:'''Marcella''': Oh, tell me when it's over!
:'''Barney''': Oh, that's very impressive!
:'''Cody''': Hey, don't scramble our egg!
:'''Barney''': No, stop! Oh! Oh, look, it's turning green!
:'''Abby''': That's number three!
:'''Marcella''': Oh, just two more to go!
:'''Cody''': Hey, where'd it go?
:'''Barney''': But I don't know!
:'''Marcella''': Look, there it is! No, mister, don't do it!
:'''Cody''': No!
:'''Marching Band Musician''': ''[blows sousaphone]''
:'''Children''': No, mister, don't blow!
:'''Marching Band Musician''': ''[He blows stuck harder and egg lands out of a sousaphone...]''
:'''Barney''': Go after it! Come on!
:'''Cody''': Let's go get it! Let's go!
:'''Barney''': Oh, hurry!
:'''Abby''': Where is it?
:'''Barney''': Oh, there it goes!
:'''Football Player B.J.''': ''[and it lands on his hands.]'' Wide open! Touchdown! Ha-ha! Yeah!
:'''Cody''': What?
:'''Abby/Marcella''': B.J.?
:'''Football Player B.J.''': B.J. makes the play of the game! The world's greatest football player, B.J.! Yeah!
:'''Abby''': Great catch, B.J.!
:'''Football Player B.J.''': You should see me throw! ''[He throws the egg...]''
:'''Barney''': What?
:'''Abby''': No!
:'''Barney''': Oh, no!
:'''Cody''': No! ''[it rolls on Chez Snobbe's roof and it landed on a woman's hat.]'' It's on that woman's hat!
:'''Barney''': Well, she's going into that restaurant!
:'''Marcella''': What are we waiting for? Let's go!
:'''Barney''': Quick, after her!
:'''Cody''': Yeah, come on, hurry up!
:'''Football Player B.J.''': Oh, man, I'm really, really sorry!
:'''Barney''': Oh, that's okay, B.J., you didn't mean to do anything wrong.
:'''Football Player B.J.''': But Barney, I...
:'''Barney''': I gotta go, bye! Wait for me!
:'''Football Player B.J.''': Okay.
:'''Abby''': Where's the egg? I don't see it.
:'''Barney''': Very fancy!
:'''Abby''': There it is!
:'''Cody''': Let's go get it!
:''[Woman laughs and on top of waiter's dish and tray]''
:'''Waiter''': Welcome to Chez Snobbe. Come right this way, please.
:'''Abby''': Where's the egg?
:'''Marcella''': We're just gonna have to look.
:'''Barney''': Maybe I could create a little distraction to get everyone's attention.
:'''Cody''': Man, they're gonna throw us outta here for sure. Well, what exactly are you gonna do, Barney? 
:'''Abby''': Barney, where'd he go?
:'''Cody''': Barney?
:'''Abby''': Barney, here is he?
:'''Marcella''': Look!
:'''Barney''': Ladies and gentlemen, on behalf of Chez Snobbe, I'd like to invite you to sing along... with one of the all-time great musical masterpieces. Maestro?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': What's he doing up there?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Children''': Now's our chance! That's the distraction! Come on, guys!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': Eww! Not in there. Enjoy your thing!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marcella''': Eww, snails? You really eat this stuff?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Abby''': We looked all over and we can't find it anywhere!
:'''Barney''': Look, there it is! Quick, after it! Thank you! Thank you!
:'''French Waiter''': ''[speaking French]''
:'''Barney''': ''[specking French]''
:'''Children''': There it is, Barney!
:'''Barney''': Oh, look, May I? Salmon? Oh, where's the egg?
:'''Waiter''': Oh, that great big colorful thing?
:'''Together''': Yes!
:'''Waiter''': We put it in a &quot;to-go&quot; sack.
:'''Abby''': What?
:'''Waiter''': We sent it back to those clowns at the circus.
:'''Together''': The circus?
:'''Waiter''': They've been playing tricks on us ever since they got to town. It's one of their takeout orders. ''[laughs]'' Wait until they crack it open.
:'''Children''': Crack it open??
:'''Barney''': What?? Oh, I don't like the sound of that! Come on, everybody! Bye-bye! So long!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': It's got to be in one of those bags.
:'''Abby''': Let's split up. I'll go with Marcella.
:'''Marcella''': And you two go together.
:'''Barney''': Okay! Wait, this way.
:'''Abby''': Did you see an egg about this big it has stripes on it?
:'''Man''': No, no, no.
:'''Marcella''': Look, look in the bag. Turn it, turn it... ''[sighs]''
:'''Cody''': Very colorful stripes around it!
:'''Barney''': Sure, have you seen that?
:'''Cody''': Yeah!
:'''Marcella''': Um, have you seen our egg it's about this big?
:'''Contortionist''': No!
:'''Abby''': Mister, have you seen our egg has colorful rings on it?
:'''Barney''': Excuse me, could you help me out? I'm looking for an egg. I really need to find it.
:''[squeaks]''
:'''BOTH''': No!
:'''Unicycle holding a sandwich''': No!
:'''Trampolinist''': No!
:'''BOTH''': Did you find it? Did you guys find it? I didn't see it anywhere.
:'''Marcella''': There it is! There it is! 
:'''Barney''': Oh, quick, get it! Get it!
:'''Cody''': Hurry! Get it! Hurry!
:'''Barney''': Oh, no! There it goes.
:'''Marcella''': Come on, get it! Hurry! 
:'''Abby''': Somebody catch it.
:''[bounce]''
:'''Barney''': Nice bounce! Whoa! Oh! Oh, stop it, no! Go after it. Excuse me.
:'''Juggler''': Wow! You caught me by surprise, my large purple friend. I like surprises. Surprises are for birthdays and birthdays go with cakes.
:'''Abby''': But, mister--
:'''Juggler''': Whoa! ''[birthday cake drops]'' What is it, young lady?
:'''Abby''': That's our egg you're juggling.
:'''Juggler''': That's good, I like eggs. Eggs are for breakfast and that means frying pans.
:'''Marcella''': It's a dream maker!
:'''Abby''': Please, I'm worried about it.
:'''Juggler''': Well, young lady, if there's a sudden gust of gravity, will the dream maker bounce?
:'''Abby''': No!
:'''Juggler''': Then we're both worried about it. There is a way to stop... called the Peking Duck trick.
:'''Barney''': How does that go? 
:'''Juggler''': The Peking Duck trick goes like this. First you all close your eyes. Are you peeking?
:'''BOTH''': No!
:'''Juggler''': Than duck...
:'''BOTH''': Oh!
:'''Barney''': Oh! Hmm, oh! ''[thunderclaps]'' Where'd it go? Where's the egg?
:'''Cody''': Where's the egg?
:'''Barney''': I don't--
:'''BOTH''': Where's the juggler? 
:'''Abby''': Uh, please?
:'''Barney''': Well, oh, no.
:'''Cody''': Oh, great! Oh, no!
:'''Barney''': Come on, everybody, let's go! 
:'''Cody''': Come on! Let's go under the tent! Let's go in here for a while.
:'''Barney''': Oh, sorry! Oh, hurry! Oh, whew!
:'''Cody''': This is not good. 
:'''Marcella''': It's just... gone.
:'''Abby''': We've lost the egg and this time we're never going to find it.
:'''Barney''': Well, don't give up. ''[light snaps]'' When the rain stops, we can look around some more and then maybe we can find it.
:'''Cody''': ''[enraged]'' We already looked around! We're not gonna find it, we've lost it!! 
:'''Abby''': ''[mad]'' You don't even wanna find it, you never did!! It was crazy kid stuff!!
:'''Cody''': ''[changes his anger into shock]'' Wait! No!
:'''Abby''': ''[gets angrier]'' What's wrong with just being a kid, Cody? What's wrong with that?

''[Abby's anger turned to sadness and a tear rolled down from her eye. Barney walks up to Abby and kneels down to her and gently comfort her.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marcella''': Okay, all aboard the log.
:'''Abby''': Okay!
:'''Barney''': Okay!
:'''Cody''': We're gonna pretend that this is the fastest, coolest airplane in the whole world.
:'''Marcella''': You think a log can fly?
:'''Cody''': We gotta try.
:'''Abby''': Okay, I will.
:'''Marcella''': Here goes.
:'''Barney''': Prepared for takeoff, Captain.
:'''Abby''': Make believe. Make believe.
:'''Marcella''': Flying with the wind in our hair.
:'''Cody''': Flying should be easy. It's kid stuff. Come on!
:'''Abby''': Faster!
:'''Marcella''': We can do this, we can.
:'''Barney''': Oh, I think we need your help. I'd like you to pretend that we can really fly. Let's all do it together. Ready? &lt;math&gt;1&lt;/math&gt;, &lt;math&gt;2&lt;/math&gt;, &lt;math&gt;3&lt;/math&gt;, now!
:'''Cody''': It's working!
:'''Barney''': Whoa! Thank you! Whoa-oa-oa-oa!
''[music playing and chorus vocalizing softly]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': But-- huh? ''Oh, no!'' Excuse me. I'm fine.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Hot Air Balloon Collector''': Good luck!
:'''Abby/Marcella''': Oh, no! He let it go too soon!
:'''Barney''': Come on, Cody! Get under it!
:'''Cody''': Go!
:'''Marcella''': Faster, Cody, faster! We got to get under it, Cody!
:'''Barney''': Hurry! Whoa!
:'''Abby/Marcella''': Faster! Go! Go! Go! Hurry!
:'''Barney''': Cody, you'd better watch it!
:'''Cody''': I'm gonna break the sound barrier!
:'''Barney''': That's it! Faster!
:''' Cody''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Barney''': Faster!
:'''Abby/Marcella''': Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Come on, Cody!
:'''Barney''': Okay, Get ready now! We're almost there, keep going! Okay, Abby. Okay, Marcella, catch it.
:'''Abby''': Go! 
:'''Barney''': Come on!
:'''Abby''': Got it!
:'''Barney''': That's it!
:'''Marcella''': Yeah!
:'''Barney''': Way to go, Abby!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Barney''': Yes, I know. A lot of hay.
:'''Grandma''': What is it? Where it come from?
:'''Barney''': ''[chuckles]''
:'''B.J.''': Look out, below! Yahoo!
:'''Barney''': ''[chuckles]''
:'''Marcella''': Cool!
:'''Abby/Marcella''': ''[laughs]''
:'''Barney''': ''[chuckles again]''
:'''B.J.''': Hi, guys was that cool or what? Whoa!
:'''Barney''': Hi, B.J.!
:'''B.J.''': Alright! Hi, Barney!
:'''Grandpa''': Whoa, hold it, let's start over again, this is all about an egg?
:'''Barney''': That's right!
:'''B.J.''': Hey, where is it?
:'''Marcella''': It's right here!
:'''Cody''': It got away from us for a while but we finally found it.
:'''Grandma''': Oh, my, what's it doing?
:'''Barney''': The last ring is light up!
''[music playing and chorus vocalizing softly]''
:'''Marcella''': It's time for the dream maker to hatch.
:'''Abby''': Quick, Cody. You've gotta put the egg back... exactly where you found it.
:'''Barney''': Oh, hurry. Oh... come on!
:'''B.J.''': Go, Cody!
:'''Cody''': No problem. The egg was right here. (He throws the egg and it lands on Baby Bop's blanket)
:'''Barney''': Cody!
:'''Cody''': No!
:'''Baby Bop''': Oh, look, I found my blankie!
:'''All''': Yeah!
:'''Cody''': Yes!
:'''Abby''': Yeah! Hey, come on!
:''[all chattering]''
:'''Baby Bop''': Did I do something good?
:'''Abby/Marcella''': Yeah!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cody''': Barney? 
:'''Barney''': Yes, Cody?
:'''Cody''': I'd just like to say that... I guess I was a big duofus before and I think you're pretty cool.
:'''Barney''': Oh, thank you, Cody. I think you're pretty cool, too.
:'''Marcella''': Hey, Barney, now can we see your dream?
:'''Abby''': Hey, where's Twinken? We want to see Barney’s dream.
:'''Barney''': Twinken is gone?
:'''Baby Bop''': Where is he?
:'''B.J.''': Twinken!
:'''Barney''': I don't know.
:'''Baby Bop''': Twinken? 
:'''Barney''': Twinken? 
:'''Baby Bop''': Here, Twinken!
:'''Barney''': Twinken!
:'''Cody''': He's got away!
:'''Barney''': Oh, oh, no!
:'''Grandma''': Where is he going?
:'''Cody''': Where's Twinken?
:'''Abby''': There is he, over the house.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Baby Bop''': Good night, everybody! Good night, Twinken!
:''[Twinken is waving goodbye before Barney and Twinken are about to transform into toy forms and Baby Bop and B.J. are going to disappear]''
:'''B.J.:''': We'll see you later, guys! ''[no audio]''
:'''Baby Bop''': Bye-bye!
:''[everyone is leaving while we say goodbye]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[last lines]''
:'''Grandpa''': ''[laughs]'' Barney, this is the-- ''[they realized Barney is gone]'' Where is he? Well, now they're both gone!
:'''Abby''': Well, Barney wouldn't just leave!
:'''Grandma''': No!!!
:'''Baby Fig''': ''[garbled]'' Barney.
:''[Everyone saw Twinken and Barney now back to his doll form]''
:'''Baby Fig''': ''[coos]''

==Taglines==
* Barney's First Movie Ever!
* An adventure as big as your imagination.

==Cast==

===Live Action Cast===

The Newton Family 
* [[w:Trevor Morgan|Trevor Morgan]] - Cody Newton
* Diana Rice - Abby Newton
* Alan Fawcett - Dad (Mr. Newton)
* Jane Wheeler - Mom (Mrs. Newton)
* David and Edouard Larouche - Fig Newton (uncredited)


* [[w:Kyla Pratt|Kyla Pratt]] - Marcella Walker


The Greenfield Family
* [[w:George Hearn|George Hearn]] - Grandpa Greenfield
* [[w:Shirley Douglas|Shirley Douglas]] - Grandma Greenfield

===Voices===
* [[w:David Joyner|David Joyner]] - Barney
** Bob West

* Jeff Ayers - Baby Bop
** Julie Johnson

* Jeff Brooks - B.J.
** Patty Wirtz

==Songs==
# Barney - The Song
# Imagine
# Let Me Call You Sweetheart
# Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
# Old MacDonald Had a Farm
# If You're Happy and You Know It
# Who's Inside It?
# If All the Raindrops
# We're Gonna Find a Way
# I Love You

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Films about nighthall songs]]
[[Category:Films set on airplanes]]
[[Category:1998 films]]
[[Category:Children's films]]
[[Category:1990s American films]]
[[Category:British films]]
[[Category:Films about gone and off-screen]]
[[Category:Canadian films]]
[[Category:Adventure films]]
[[Category:Fantasy films]]
[[Category:Musical films]]
[[Category:Comedy films]]
[[Category:Films featuring puppetry]]
[[Category:Films based on television series]]
[[Category:Films about dinosaurs]]
[[Category:Films about friendship]]</text>
      <sha1>rh3qfu7kv31exiknj10x14ea5l4i71c</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Megamind: The Button of Doom</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>207817</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965185</id>
      <parentid>3964771</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T03:32:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39691-77</username>
        <id>3349864</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965185</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="11167" sha1="q70eems6jzl2ra2koxlhz679wniq19a" xml:space="preserve">{{italic_title}}
'''''[[w:Megamind#Megamind: The Button of Doom|Megamind: The Button of Doom]]''''' is a [[w:computer animated|computer animated]] [[w:short film|short film]] released on February 25, 2011, starring [[Will Ferrell]] and [[David Cross]].

==Dialogue==
:''[The television mini movie begins in a close-up of Megamind's face as the camera pulls back away from him]''
:'''Megamind''': ''[first lines]'' Citizens of Metrocity, long have I waited to give you your just desserts? Prepare to face the unbridled wrath of… my fantastic bargains! ''[raises his arms to the multiple screens showing a logo reading &quot;Evil Lair Yard Sale&quot;, then laughs. The crowd cheers]'' Welcome! Welcome, citizens of Metrocity, to the Evil Lair Yard Sale! As you know, this is my first day as defender of Metrocity. And now that I'm no longer evil, I no longer need things that do evil. ''[gives a boy a teddy bear which sprouts metal spikes and its eyes glow blue. On its mouth, two smaller spikes resemble pointed teeth]''
:'''Boy''': A Terror Teddy. Awesome!
:'''Megamind''': Excellent choice. Now, let the browsing commence! Minion, we're gonna need more petty cash. ''[Minion approaches with something hiding behind a chalkboard]'' Uh, what's behind there, Minion?
:'''Minion''': Hmm, nothing.
:''[A large spider-like robot with her nine red eyes knocks the chalkboard away]''
:'''Megamind''': Aha! I knew it!
:'''Minion''': Please, please, please. Can't we just keep the spider-bot?
:'''Megamind''': Minion, heroes don't drive around in creepy spee-ider-bots.
:''[The spider-bot sadly stalks away]''
:'''Minion''': See? Now you've hurt her feelings. Spider-bot, come here.
:''[Megamind does a face-palm as your partner, Minion tries to call Spider-bot. A boy in a blue shirt plays with Megamind's dehydration gun as if pretending to shoot lasers]''
:'''Damien's Mom''': Damien, we don't play with laser guns.
:'''Damien''': Come on, Mom!
:'''Damien's Mom''': Put it back this instant!
:'''Megamind''': Madame, he's merely expressing himself. ''[Damien blows a raspberry at his mother]'' Hahahaha! Besides, it's not a laser gun, it's a dehydration… ''[Blue light from the gun shoots onto Damien's mother, turning her into a small glowing cube]'' …gun. ''[Looking down at the cube, he picks it up]'' Uh, just soak her in some water, not the toilet. She'll be fine. ''[gives Damien the cube]''
:'''Damien''': That's so cool.
:'''Megamind''': Yes. Uh, free donuts with every billion-dollar purchase!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[After Megamind sells all of his evil stuff to the citizens of Metro City]''
:'''Megamind''': Fantastic. The place is already looking less evil.
:'''Minion''': Sir. Now that we've got rid all of your &quot;evil things&quot;, how are we gonna protect Metro City?
:'''Megamind''': Way ahead of you, Minion!
''[steps out in a suit]''
:'''Minion''': What are you wearing?
:'''Megamind''': My super-secret super-hero super-suit! I designed it myself! It copies all of Metro Man's powers: super-boots, super strength, and super x-ray slash laser vision!
:'''Minion''': Umm... yeah, I'm not sure if it's really... you.
:'''Megamind''': Au contraire, filet Minion!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[When, Minion found the box of button.]''
:'''Megamind''': What's that?
:'''Minion''': It's the only thing I couldn't sell. Other than the Death Ray just a box with a button on it. I don't even emeber what is does.
:'''Megamind''': Well, We must do something. Maybe, It opens the garage door.
:''[After Minion found a box with a red button, Megamind presses it and the box hovers. The button changes to a holographic device]''
:'''Megamind''': '''WAIT, WHAT?!''' Whoops!
:'''Minion''': Oh, dear!
:''[A projection shows Mega-Megamind's head]''
:'''Mega-Megamind''': Greetings, hero! You've just unleashed an unspeakable evil upon Metrocity! '''AND YOU'RE REALLY, REALLY NOT GONNA LIKE IT!!!!'''
:''[Megamind and his partner, Minion are shocked in horror! The projection beast heads out of the Evil Lair to a bunker!]''
:'''Megamind''': Where did that beast go?!
:'''Minion''': I don't know!
:''[The projection beast heads to bunker.]''
:'''Mega-Megamind''': ''[presses a switch]'' Unspeakable evil: activated!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Minion''': Remember the forget-me bomb?
:'''Megamind''': Yes... no. Oh, how about the Encyclopedia Bombica?
:'''Minion''': Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Kittens?
:'''Megamind''': They were cute, but they were deadly.
:'''Minion''': [gets into a beast position] The Star Destructosaurus...
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[After the Mega-Megamind projection head activated a giant droid beast resembling the real Megamind.]''
:'''Minion''': Hm?
:'''Megamind''': Don't move. I think I remember what it is. It's my favorite! ''[He and his partner, Minion look over at the Beast.]'' It's the Mega-Megamind!
:'''Mega-Megamind''': Ollo!
:'''Megamind''': I transferred my evil personality into a giant robot. Man, I do good work.
:'''Minion''': Really terrific stuff, but we should probably turn it off.
:''[From its point of view, the Mega-Megamind looks down at Megamind and Minion]''
:'''Mega-Megamind''': White suit, white cape. If it isn't my old friend, Metro Man.
:''[Words reading &quot;Metro Man: Identified&quot; and &quot;Destroy&quot; appear on Megamind, who looks confused. Question marks appear on his partner, Minion.]''
:'''Minion''': Haha! He thinks you're Metro Man.
:'''Megamind''': Well, I am defender of Metrocity now. This is the perfect time for me to debut my super-suit.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Minion''': Sir, are in the invisible shuttle?
:'''Megamind''': ''[in the car''] No...
:'''Mega-Megamind''': Are you a chicken? Bok, bok, bok, bok, bok!
:'''Megamind''': Get in!
:'''Minion''': Oh!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Megamind''': Oh, we're in trouble, Minion! I programmed it never to stop until it eliminates a hero! It's out there, searching for me.
:'''Mega-Megamind''': Where are you, hero?!
:'''Minion''': Is it searching for me too?
:'''Mega-Megamind''': And your mysterious, who's dressed as Minion for some reason?!
:''[Minion ducks down]''
:'''Megamind''': But don't worry, we can live in here from now on. The Brain-bots can bring us snacks.
:'''Minion''': Sir, that is '''CRAZY!''' We're gonna have to face this thing eventually!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mega-Megamind''': '''ANYONE, HOME?!?!?!?! COME OUT, SO I CAN GET YOU!!!!'''
:'''Megamind''': '''HEY, MEGABEAST!!!!'''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Megamind''': Are you in the mood for a slice of hero pie?
:'''Mega-Megamind''': '''ONLY IF IT COMES LA EXPLODE!!!!''' '''WHERE'D YOU GO?!?!?!?!'''
:'''Megamind''': Do you feel the taunting power of my eyebrow?
:'''Mega-Megamind''': '''HOW DARE YOU BROW ME!!!!''' ''[growls]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Megamind''': ''[to the Mega-Megamind]'' Prepare to beat your maker, Beast.
:'''Mega-Megamind''': ''[growls]'' '''SAY, BYE-BYE, METRO, MAN!!!!'''
:'''Megamind''': Fire, Minion! [looks horrified] Minion! '''FIRE!!!'''
:'''Minion''': Slight problem here, sir.
:'''Megamind''': Slight problem?! How slight?!
:'''Minion''': Uh, your super-suit smashed the death ray controls.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Mega-Megamind''': [about to squash Megamind] '''...TALK ABOUT A CRUSHING DEFEAT!!!!'''
:'''Megamind''': The old evil beast is so annoying!
:''[Megamind pushes the button to fire at Mega-Megamind.]''
:'''Mega-Megamind''': '''OW!!!!'''
:'''Megamind''': Hurry up, Minion! '''I CAN'T KEEP THIS UP!!!''' '''MINION?!?!?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!'''
:'''Minion''': '''HA-HA!!!! I'VE GOT IT. SIR!!!!'''
:''[The death ray has been prepared to fire power at Mega-Megamind.]]''
:'''Megamind''': OK, Minion, on my marco.
:'''Mega-Megamind''': '''I HATE SPEE-IDERS!!!!''' ''[grunts]''
:'''Megamind''': '''MARCO!!!!''' ''[The Mega-Megamind launches Spider-bot with her master, Megamind]''
:'''Minion''': '''POLO!!!!''' ''[activates the death ray]''
:'''Mega-Megamind''': '''OH, NO!!!!'''
:''[The Mega-Megamind is blown up. Megamind laughs victoriously and watches the explosion]''
:'''Megamind''': Goodbye, old man.
:''[Back in the lair, Minion smiles proudly in shouting]''
:'''Minion''': We did it! We did it!
:'''Megamind''': Yes, we did, Minion. Now, let's go get the rest of our evil stuff back.
:''[Spider-bot trots back to the lair. Nighttime, in an apartment, several kids have a party with a banner reading &quot;No More School!&quot; with a drawing of Damien. Nearby, their parents, now dehydrated cubes, sit in a glass bowl on a small table]''
:'''Boy #1''': No more school! ''[digs his face into a cake]''
:'''Boy #2''': We're free!
:'''Girl #1''': No parents!
:'''Girl #2''': Food fight!
:'''Girl #3''': Freedom!
:'''Boy #3''': ''[writes on the wall with a blue crayon]'' Booger! Hahahaha!
:'''Damien''': ''[looks at the cubes]'' With our parents dehydrated, we can rule Metro City! Yes!
:'''Kids''': Yay!
:''[Suddenly, the door busts open, scaring the kids]''
:'''Megamind''': ''[as he and Minion enter the apartment]'' Not today or any ''other'' day, my sugar-fueled friend.
:'''Damien''': ''[looking nervous as Megamind and Minion cast their shadows over him]'' Oh, my goodness.
:'''Minion''': I'll take that. Thank you very much. ''[takes the dehydration gun]''
:'''Megamind''': I'd normally cart your heinies downtown… ''[picks up the glass bowl]'' and I have a feeling that your parents will offer you a far more severe punishment. A glass of water, Minion… ''[Minion gives him a glass of water]'' if you please.
:''[The kids gasp in shock]''
:'''Kids''': ''[slow-motion]'' No!!!!!!!
:''[As two girls and three boys run off, one boy covers his face while the cube falls toward the glass of water, just before Damien could catch it. Outside, Megamind and Minion exit the building]''
:'''Minion''': Well, sir, the weapons of justice are back where they belong. ''[He hands Megamind his dehydration gun]''
:'''Megamind''': Let's just hope the city is ready for me.
:'''Minion''': I say it ''is'', sir.
:'''Megamind''': Look! ''[They see a light shining in the sky with Megamind's logo]'' They made me my own signal.
:'''Minion''': &quot;Us.&quot; They made ''us our'' own signal. ''[sobs]''
:'''Megamind''': Oh! Pull yourself together, Minion! ''[Minion stoped sobing]'' Now, make a note. It needs to be a lot bigger.
:'''Minion''': Yes, sir.
:'''Megamind''': Ready our shuttle! Let's go patrol, heroically!
:'''Megamind and Minion''': '''YAY!!''' ''[get into the invisible shuttle, and drive off]''
:'''Megamind''': Oh, what fun!

==Cast==
* [[Will Ferrell]] — Megamind and Mega-Megamind
* [[David Cross]] — Minion
* [[Catherine Taber]] — Spider-bot
* Michelle Belforte Hauser — Damien's Mom
* Jordan Alexander Hauser — Damien
* Kevin N. Bailey — Kevin
* Dante James Hauser — Nigel
* Declan James Swift — Peter
* Fintan Thomas Swift — Barney
* [[Frank Welker]] — Brainbots

==External links==
{{Wikipedia|Megamind#Megamind: The Button of Doom}}

[[Category:2011 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Computer-animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated science fiction short films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:Direct-to-video animated short films]]
[[Category:Films set in Michigan]]
[[Category:Films directed by Simon J. Smith]]
[[Category:Megamind]]</text>
      <sha1>q70eems6jzl2ra2koxlhz679wniq19a</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>A Matter of Loaf and Death</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>209471</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965018</id>
      <parentid>3960981</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:47:20Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-38129-10</username>
        <id>3347605</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965018</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="11388" sha1="r44twdto1mvhmmoxx2g0e1h5mvxai6o" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:A Matter of Loaf and Death|Wallace &amp; Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death]]''''' is a 2008 British [[w:Stop motion|stop-motion animated]] short film created by [[w:Nick Park|Nick Park]], and the fourth of his shorts to star his characters [[Wallace and Gromit]]. It is the first ''Wallace and Gromit'' short since ''[[A Close Shave]]'' in 1995.

''Wallace &amp; Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death'' is a [[w:murder mystery|murder mystery]], with Wallace and Gromit starting a new bakery business. With an unknown assailant murdering bakers, Gromit tries to solve the case before Wallace ends up a victim himself. It was the last ''Wallace and Gromit'' film before the retirement of Wallace's voice actor [[w:Peter Sallis|Peter Sallis]] in 2010.
:''Directed by [[w:Nick Park|Nick Park]]. Written by Nick Park and [[w:Bob Baker (scriptwriter)|Bob Baker]].''

==Dialogue==
:'''Wallace''': Mmmm, lovely cheese. ''[Gromit hits the windmill, with the water balloon falling on Wallace]'' I could just wash it down with nice... ''[the water balloon falls on Wallace, startling him as he wakes up]'' I was just coming, lad. ''[Gromit takes the bread out, pulling the lever]'' On my way, Gromit! ''[slides down, putting pants on]'' With you in a jiffy! ''[slides down]'' Tally-ho! ''[Gromit continues riding down, then Wallace continues sliding down]'' Oh, no! ''[Gromit moves the slide down]'' Thanks, lad! ''[the hand touches Wallace, then Gromit puts bread in, closing the door, saying, &quot;Dough to Door DELIVERY&quot;, rising a hat]'' Fill 'er up, lad! ''[Gromit presses the tea button, driving out of the garage, drinking tea]'' Ah. Lovely cuppa, Gromit! But, a slightly diesel-y aftertaste, perhaps? How's that breakfast coming on? ''[Gromit puts toast on the plate]'' Well done, lad! ''[looks at a toast]'' Very well done. ''[eats toast]'' Thanks, chuck! ''[pats Gromit on the head, then looks at the newspaper as Gromit blows his hat back up again]'' Oh... Oh, dear! Another baker, battered with his own rolling pin. Would you credit it? Still, looking on the bright side, I suppose it means more business for us, huh, Gromit?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': Oh! Hello.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': We were just passing by, going for a walk, and Fluffles insisted on dropping in, hoping you would join us. Please say yes, she'll be so disappointed, wouldn't you, Fluffy? Wouldn't you, Fluffy?
:'''Wallace''': Oh! Well, if you insist, but I'm in me work things.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': I like a man in a uniform. Come on! Walkies!
:'''Wallace''': ''[offscreen]'' Manage without me, won't you, lad? ''[closes the door]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Gromit rushes to the kitchen and gets in Wallace's way, stopping him from attempting to try the soup]''
:'''Wallace''': What the...Hey! What are you playing at, lad? ''[picks up Gromit]'' This is getting ridiculous!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[takes Gromit]'' Oh, Wallace, he just wants a bit of attention, that's all. ''[to Gromit]'' Now, my little poochy woochy, let Auntie Piella sort you out. ''[looks seductively at Wallace once more...then bites herself on the arm, as Gromit watches in shock]'' OW! Ow! He bit me! ''
:''[Wallace suddenly notices this, and Gromit turns to her in shock]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[alarmed]'' Huh?!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': I was just trying to help, and he bit me, Wallace!
:'''Wallace''': Gromit! How dare you bite my betrothed! That's very impolite.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': Oh, don't be too hard on him, Wallace, please. Just a little punishment, that's all. ''[holds up some chains]''
:''[The scene cuts to Wallace shutting the drawer, locking it, and Gromit is shown muzzled and chained as he is shown cleaning the dishes]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[shuts the drawer and locks it, with Gromit is shown muzzled and chained as he cleans the dishes]'' I'm ''surprised'' at you, Gromit. I really am!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[offscreen]'' Oh, Wallace, my sugar dumpling, have you got a moment?
:'''Wallace''': Oh, on my way, my cupcake! ''[to Gromit]'' You'll not leave this kitchen till you've done every last one. ''[to himself, as Gromit continues washing]'' I don't know, taking a bite out of my lovely fiance--it really ''is'' the limit!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': ''[after a flour bag hits Piella and knocks her down the stairs]'' Oh! Are you all right, my flower? ''[laughs]'' Flour! [flower] Get it? &quot;Flower&quot;?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[furiously]'' GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!! I ''HATE'' '''flour...'''I ''HATE'' '''''bread...'''''and I ''HATE'' '''BAKERS, YOU ''UTTER'' AND COMPLETE ''FRUITCAKE!!!!!''''' ''[she furiously pulls the ring off her finger and flings it at Wallace. It flies into his hand, but he does not catch it]''
:'''Wallace''': OH! ''[chuckles nervously]'' That's a bit steep, isn't it, my sweet?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[picks up Fluffles]'' Fluffles? I want a word with you: Back home. ''[walks off, then shuts the door offscreen]''
:''[The scene cuts to the exterior of the house, and then the scene cuts back to Wallace looks at the ring before Gromit putting a cup on the table, dripping the petals]''
:'''Wallace''': Oh, thanks, old pal. I just don't get it. ''[Gromit stirs the cup]'' One minute they love bakers, and the next minute they hate them. And I'm not a fruitcake, am I, lad? ''[Gromit stops stirring the tea and pats Wallace]'' I suppose you can't be everybody's cup of tea, can you?
:''[They both clink their teas, then they hear a doorbell, looking at Piella, holding a large present]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': I'm ''so'' sorry, Wallace. So, so, sorry. I ''don't know'' what came over me...apart from the flour, of course! ''[laughs]''
:'''Wallace''': Oh. Ha-ha! Yes.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': Let's forget about it. Here's a cake to celebrate. ''[she suddenly stops in the metal detector as it starts beeping]'' Oops! Must be my keys.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[notices Gromit and grabs him]'' Got you, you little meddling mutt! So nice of you to come. Pity you'll miss your master's tea party. It'll go off with a bang!
:'''Wallace''': Ooh, I say! Get the kettle on, Gromit.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[throws Gromit into a storage closet with Fluffles]'' I'll deal with you two later. ''[closes the door as she laughs maniacally]''
:'''Wallace''': Come on, lad! What's keeping you?
:''[The clock almost strikes 4:00]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': At last, my 13th. My baker's dozen! ''[The Bake-O-Lite balloon appears outside the window]'' Huh? ''[the scene reveals that Gromit and Fluffles are flying the balloon, waving to her]'' What?! ''[turns around and sees she somehow locked them in the Bake-O-Lite storeroom]'' Curse that balloon! And curse that prevailing south-westerly, they'll be there in no time!
:''[The clock chimes as it strucks 4:00]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': Gromit, it's a bomb! The cake's a bomb! Wait a minute. You don't think Piella could be the Cereal [serial] Killer?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[puts her feet on the bomb as she holds a rolling pin in one hand and Fluffles in the other]'' Well done, Wallace! Sharp as a brick. Now do exactly as I say, or Fluffles gets snuffled. ''[Fluffles bites her hand]'' OW!!! ''[Gromit snatches the bomb from underneath Piella's foot, then Piella throws Fluffles to the floor, releasing her, and looks at the bite mark on her hand, irritated]'' You've crossed me once too often, you treacherous little...! ''[then slaps Fluffles, who yelps]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[notices the bomb has fallen out of the window and grunts in annoyance]'' That has put a spanner in the works. ''[picks up a wrench]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[backing away]'' But, Piella, you're the Bake-O-Lite Girl!
:'''Piella Bakewell''':  ''[swings the wrench as Wallace dodges, then pulls the lid off the ventilation shaft]'' '''''WAS''''' the Bake-O-Lite Girl! ''[as she throws the lid off the wrench]'' I ate too much, you see?
:'''Wallace''': Oh, really?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[pulls another lid off the ventilation shaft]'' I ''couldn't'' ride the balloon anymore... 
:'''Wallace''': Oh, dear!
:'''Piella''': ...so they ''DROPPED'' me!
:'''Wallace''': What a blow! ''[he accidentally hits his head on a pipe]'' Ooh!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[pulls off another lid, then as lifts up the wrench]'' '''ME!''' A curse on bakers and ''their '''loathsome confections!!!'''''
:'''Wallace''': '''''GROMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!''''' 
:''[Piella attempts to strike her final attack, but abruptly stops as she freezes. Wallace then opens his eyes slowly as he's still alive. Piella slowly turns around, then gasps as lets go of the wrench, dropping it, and a machine's arm flies towards her and smacks her aside, causing her to bounce across into a stack of lard cans]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': ''[stops the fight between Piella and Fluffles]'' Hey! Anyone seen the bomb? What? ''[turns around, revealing the bomb is in the back of his pants]'' What?
:''[Gromit suddenly notices this in shock, as well as Fluffles, who also gasps in shock]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': Bomb [bon] Voyage, Wallace! ''[leaps from the edge and lands into the balloon]'' Your buns are as good as ''toasted! ''[turns up the hot air from the balloon, causing the fire to ignite]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[notices the bomb in the back of his pants, then starts panicking]'' GROMIT! I've got a bomb in me pants!!! Help me, Gromit! Do something!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': Oh, what a relief! Oh, evening, sisters!
:''[The two nuns notice this, and they gasp in shock, dropping their kittens]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[vowing in regret]'' I will be back to get you, Wallace! I WILL HAVE MY BAKER'S DOZEN!!
:'''Wallace''': But Piella, the balloon won't hold you!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[last words before her death, redeeming herself]'' They can't just drop '''''me.''''' I'm as light as a feather. I'M THE BAKE-O-LITE GIRL...!!! ''[the hot air balloon floats down into the crocodile pit at the zoo]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[off-screen]'' '''NOOOOOO!!!''' ''[the balloon splashes into the crocodile pit and the crocodiles eat Piella alive along with the balloon. Wallace covers his eyes, looking away, along with Fluffles, who does so as she clings to Gromit. after that, Wallace slowly looks again, as a belch is heard, with the &quot;remains&quot; of the balloon floating up into the air]'' Farewell, my angel cake. You'll always be my Bake-O-Lite Girl. ''[Piella's younger, yet thinner and redeemed spirit then appears, waving at Wallace and then fades away into the heavens. Short pause, then Wallace is suddenly relieved]'' Ha! I think I need a cup of tea after all that. Care to join me, you two? ''[as he starts to walk back to the living room]''

==Cast==
* [[w:Peter Sallis|Peter Sallis]] as Wallace
* [[w:Sally Lindsay|Sally Lindsay]] as Piella Bakewell
* Melissa Collier as Fluffles
* Sarah Laborde as Bake-O-Lite singer
* [[w:Ben Whitehead|Ben Whitehead]] as Baker Bob

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:2008 films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:British animated short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Stop-motion animated short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Animated TV specials|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]</text>
      <sha1>r44twdto1mvhmmoxx2g0e1h5mvxai6o</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965019</id>
      <parentid>3965018</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:48:51Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-38129-10</username>
        <id>3347605</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3965019</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="11406" sha1="h4fs6l8p0if3bsnibmwxklqndqbyofz" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:A Matter of Loaf and Death|Wallace &amp; Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death]]''''' is a 2008 British [[w:Stop motion|stop-motion animated]] short film created by [[w:Nick Park|Nick Park]], and the fourth of his shorts to star his characters [[Wallace and Gromit]]. It is the first ''Wallace and Gromit'' short since ''[[A Close Shave]]'' in 1995.

''Wallace &amp; Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death'' is a [[w:murder mystery|murder mystery]], with Wallace and Gromit starting a new bakery business. With an unknown assailant murdering bakers, Gromit tries to solve the case before Wallace ends up a victim himself. It was the last ''Wallace and Gromit'' film before the retirement of Wallace's voice actor [[w:Peter Sallis|Peter Sallis]] in 2010.
:''Directed by [[w:Nick Park|Nick Park]]. Written by Nick Park and [[w:Bob Baker (scriptwriter)|Bob Baker]].''

==Dialogue==
:'''Wallace''': Mmmm, lovely cheese. ''[Gromit hits the windmill, with the water balloon falling on Wallace]'' I could just wash it down with nice... ''[the water balloon falls on Wallace, startling him as he wakes up]'' I was just coming, lad. ''[Gromit takes the bread out, pulling the lever]'' On my way, Gromit! ''[slides down, putting pants on]'' With you in a jiffy! ''[slides down]'' Tally-ho! ''[Gromit continues riding down, then Wallace continues sliding down]'' Oh, no! ''[Gromit moves the slide down]'' Thanks, lad! ''[the hand touches Wallace, then Gromit puts bread in, closing the door, saying, &quot;Dough to Door DELIVERY&quot;, rising a hat]'' Fill 'er up, lad! ''[Gromit presses the tea button, driving out of the garage, drinking tea]'' Ah. Lovely cuppa, Gromit! But, a slightly diesel-y aftertaste, perhaps? How's that breakfast coming on? ''[Gromit puts toast on the plate]'' Well done, lad! ''[looks at a toast]'' Very well done. ''[eats toast]'' Thanks, chuck! ''[pats Gromit on the head, then looks at the newspaper as Gromit blows his hat back up again]'' Oh... Oh, dear! Another baker, battered with his own rolling pin. Would you credit it? Still, looking on the bright side, I suppose it means more business for us, huh, Gromit?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': Oh! Hello.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': We were just passing by, going for a walk, and Fluffles insisted on dropping in, hoping you would join us. Please say yes, she'll be so disappointed, wouldn't you, Fluffy? Wouldn't you, Fluffy?
:'''Wallace''': Oh! Well, if you insist, but I'm in me work things.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': I like a man in a uniform. Come on! Walkies!
:'''Wallace''': ''[offscreen]'' Manage without me, won't you, lad? ''[closes the door]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Gromit rushes to the kitchen and gets in Wallace's way, stopping him from attempting to try the soup]''
:'''Wallace''': What the...Hey! What are you playing at, lad? ''[picks up Gromit]'' This is getting ridiculous!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[takes Gromit]'' Oh, Wallace, he just wants a bit of attention, that's all. ''[to Gromit]'' Now, my little poochy woochy, let Auntie Piella sort you out. ''[looks seductively at Wallace once more...then bites herself on the arm, as Gromit watches in shock]'' OW! Ow! He bit me! ''
:''[Wallace suddenly notices this, and Gromit turns to her in shock]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[alarmed]'' Huh?!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': I was just trying to help, and he bit me, Wallace!
:'''Wallace''': Gromit! How dare you bite my betrothed! That's very impolite.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': Oh, don't be too hard on him, Wallace, please. Just a little punishment, that's all. ''[holds up some chains]''
:''[The scene cuts to Wallace shutting the drawer, locking it, and Gromit is shown muzzled and chained as he is shown cleaning the dishes]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[shuts the drawer and locks it, with Gromit is shown muzzled and chained as he cleans the dishes]'' I'm ''surprised'' at you, Gromit. I really am!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[offscreen]'' Oh, Wallace, my sugar dumpling, have you got a moment?
:'''Wallace''': Oh, on my way, my cupcake! ''[to Gromit]'' You'll not leave this kitchen till you've done every last one. ''[to himself, as Gromit continues washing]'' I don't know, taking a bite out of my lovely fiance--it really ''is'' the limit!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': ''[after a flour bag hits Piella and knocks her down the stairs]'' Oh! Are you all right, my flower? ''[laughs]'' Flour! [flower] Get it? &quot;Flower&quot;?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[furiously]'' GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!! I ''HATE'' '''flour...'''I ''HATE'' '''''bread...'''''and I ''HATE'' '''BAKERS, YOU ''UTTER'' AND COMPLETE ''FRUITCAKE!!!!!''''' ''[she furiously pulls the ring off her finger and flings it at Wallace. It flies into his hand, but he does not catch it]''
:'''Wallace''': OH! ''[chuckles nervously]'' That's a bit steep, isn't it, my sweet?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[picks up Fluffles]'' Fluffles? I want a word with you: Back home. ''[walks off, then shuts the door offscreen]''
:''[The scene cuts to the exterior of the house, and then the scene cuts back to Wallace looks at the ring before Gromit putting a cup on the table, dripping the petals]''
:'''Wallace''': Oh, thanks, old pal. I just don't get it. ''[Gromit stirs the cup]'' One minute they love bakers, and the next minute they hate them. And I'm not a fruitcake, am I, lad? ''[Gromit stops stirring the tea and pats Wallace]'' I suppose you can't be everybody's cup of tea, can you?
:''[They both clink their teas, then they hear a doorbell, looking at Piella, holding a large present]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': I'm ''so'' sorry, Wallace. So, so, sorry. I ''don't know'' what came over me...apart from the flour, of course! ''[laughs]''
:'''Wallace''': Oh. Ha-ha! Yes.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': Let's forget about it. Here's a cake to celebrate. ''[she suddenly stops in the metal detector as it starts beeping]'' Oops! Must be my keys.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[notices Gromit and grabs him]'' Got you, you little meddling mutt! So nice of you to come. Pity you'll miss your master's tea party. It'll go off with a bang!
:'''Wallace''': Ooh, I say! Get the kettle on, Gromit.
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[throws Gromit into a storage closet with Fluffles]'' I'll deal with you two later. ''[closes the door as she laughs maniacally]''
:'''Wallace''': Come on, lad! What's keeping you?
:''[The clock almost strikes 4:00]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': At last, my 13th. My baker's dozen! ''[The Bake-O-Lite balloon appears outside the window]'' Huh? ''[the scene reveals that Gromit and Fluffles are flying the balloon, waving to her]'' What?! ''[turns around and sees she somehow locked them in the Bake-O-Lite storeroom]'' Curse that balloon! And curse that prevailing south-westerly, they'll be there in no time!
:''[The clock chimes as it strucks 4:00]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': Gromit, it's a bomb! The cake's a bomb! Wait a minute. You don't think Piella could be...?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[puts her feet on the bomb]'' The Cereal [serial] Killer? ''[she is shown holding a rolling pin in one hand and Fluffles in the other]'' Well done, Wallace! Sharp as a brick. Now do exactly as I say, or Fluffles gets snuffled. ''[Fluffles bites her hand]'' OW!!! ''[Gromit snatches the bomb from underneath Piella's foot, then Piella throws Fluffles to the floor, releasing her, and looks at the bite mark on her hand, irritated]'' You've crossed me once too often, you treacherous little...! ''[then slaps Fluffles, who yelps]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[notices the bomb has fallen out of the window and grunts in annoyance]'' That has put a spanner in the works. ''[picks up a wrench]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[backing away]'' But, Piella, you're the Bake-O-Lite Girl!
:'''Piella Bakewell''':  ''[swings the wrench as Wallace dodges, then pulls the lid off the ventilation shaft]'' '''''WAS''''' the Bake-O-Lite Girl! ''[as she throws the lid off the wrench]'' I ate too much, you see?
:'''Wallace''': Oh, really?
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[pulls another lid off the ventilation shaft]'' I ''couldn't'' ride the balloon anymore... 
:'''Wallace''': Oh, dear!
:'''Piella''': ...so they ''DROPPED'' me!
:'''Wallace''': What a blow! ''[he accidentally hits his head on a pipe]'' Ooh!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[pulls off another lid, then as lifts up the wrench]'' '''ME!''' A curse on bakers and ''their '''loathsome confections!!!'''''
:'''Wallace''': '''''GROMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!''''' 
:''[Piella attempts to strike her final attack, but abruptly stops as she freezes. Wallace then opens his eyes slowly as he's still alive. Piella slowly turns around, then gasps as lets go of the wrench, dropping it, and a machine's arm flies towards her and smacks her aside, causing her to bounce across into a stack of lard cans]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': ''[stops the fight between Piella and Fluffles]'' Hey! Anyone seen the bomb? What? ''[turns around, revealing the bomb is in the back of his pants]'' What?
:''[Gromit suddenly notices this in shock, as well as Fluffles, who also gasps in shock]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': Bomb [bon] Voyage, Wallace! ''[leaps from the edge and lands into the balloon]'' Your buns are as good as ''toasted! ''[turns up the hot air from the balloon, causing the fire to ignite]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[notices the bomb in the back of his pants, then starts panicking]'' GROMIT! I've got a bomb in me pants!!! Help me, Gromit! Do something!!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wallace''': Oh, what a relief! Oh, evening, sisters!
:''[The two nuns notice this, and they gasp in shock, dropping their kittens]''
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[vowing in regret]'' I will be back to get you, Wallace! I WILL HAVE MY BAKER'S DOZEN!!
:'''Wallace''': But Piella, the balloon won't hold you!
:'''Piella Bakewell''': ''[last words before her death, redeeming herself]'' They can't just drop '''''me.''''' I'm as light as a feather. I'M THE BAKE-O-LITE GIRL...!!! ''[the hot air balloon floats down into the crocodile pit at the zoo]''
:'''Wallace''': ''[off-screen]'' '''NOOOOOO!!!''' ''[the balloon splashes into the crocodile pit and the crocodiles eat Piella alive along with the balloon. Wallace covers his eyes, looking away, along with Fluffles, who does so as she clings to Gromit. after that, Wallace slowly looks again, as a belch is heard, with the &quot;remains&quot; of the balloon floating up into the air]'' Farewell, my angel cake. You'll always be my Bake-O-Lite Girl. ''[Piella's younger, yet thinner and redeemed spirit then appears, waving at Wallace and then fades away into the heavens. Short pause, then Wallace is suddenly relieved]'' Ha! I think I need a cup of tea after all that. Care to join me, you two? ''[as he starts to walk back to the living room]''

==Cast==
* [[w:Peter Sallis|Peter Sallis]] as Wallace
* [[w:Sally Lindsay|Sally Lindsay]] as Piella Bakewell
* Melissa Collier as Fluffles
* Sarah Laborde as Bake-O-Lite singer
* [[w:Ben Whitehead|Ben Whitehead]] as Baker Bob

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:2008 films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:British animated short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Stop-motion animated short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Animated TV specials|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films|Matter of Loaf and Death]]</text>
      <sha1>h4fs6l8p0if3bsnibmwxklqndqbyofz</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Johann Most</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>209781</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964832</id>
      <parentid>3845019</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T11:59:03Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Grnrchst</username>
        <id>3175587</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Pittsburgh Manifesto (October 1883) */ This symbol has nothing to do with the Pittsburgh Manifesto or Most</comment>
      <origin>3964832</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="18501" sha1="ca8fj0349wuxo7cf44b5zs971k9224o" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Johannmost.jpg|thumb|The war of the poor against the rich is the only way from oppression to deliverance.]]
[[File:Johann Most3.jpg|thumb|Whoever has recognized the villainy of the present conditions, is in duty bound to raise his voice, in order to expose them, and thereby open the eyes of the people. ... Whoever thus uses speech will be accused of inciting disturbance by the governing rabble; he will be bitterly hated and persecuted. This shows that the only possible and practical enlightenment must be of an inciting nature. Then let us incite!]]
[[File:Projected Wealth Inequality.png|thumb|A superabundance of actual wealth in the hands of the few must create hunger, typhus, and other epidemics among the many. The injustice - yea the idiocy - of this state of affairs is evident. The money-bags of course merely shrug their shoulders. This they will continue to do until a rope well tied over their shoulders will end all further shrugging.]]
'''[[w:Johann Most|Johann Most]]''' (February 5, 1846 – March 17, 1906) was a German-American anarchist politician, newspaper editor, and orator. 

==Quotes==

* Anything that can tear up the side of a mountain should definitely be effective against a high society party attended by royalty or capitalist exploiters (monopolists).
** ''Science of Revolutionary Warfare '' (1978)

=== ''The Beast of Property'' (1884) ===

* &quot;Among the beasts of prey, man is certainly the worst.&quot; This expression, very commonly made nowadays, is only relatively true. Not man as such, but man in connection with wealth is a beast of prey. The richer a man, the greater his greed for more. We may call such a monster the &quot;beast of property&quot;. It now rules the world, makes mankind miserable, and gains in cruelty and voracity with the progress of our so-called &quot;civilization&quot;. 

* Either by direct brute force, by cunning, or by fraud, this [[Bourgeoisie|horde]] has from time to time [[Enclosure|seized]] the soil with all its wealth. The laws of inheritance and [[w:Fee tail|entail]], and the changing of hands, have lent a &quot;venerable&quot; color to this robbery, and consequently mystified and erased the true character of such actions. For this reason, the &quot;beast of property&quot; is not yet fully recognized, but is, on the contrary, worshipped with a holy awe.

* In order to labor, there are required not only ability and will, but also room to work, tools, raw materials and means of sustenance. The poor man must, therefore, by force of necessity, apply to those who possess these things in plenty. 

* His pretended &quot;saviors&quot; ... place him under the yoke of labor - they force him to the utmost of his mental and physical abilities to produce new treasures, which however he is not entitled to own. 

* It is the lash of hunger which compels the poor man to submit. In order to live he must sell &amp;mdash;&quot;voluntarily&quot; sell&amp;mdash;himself every day and hour to the &quot;beast of property&quot;.

* The times when Christian-Germanic robbers stole entire countries, deprived the inhabitants of the soil, and pressed them to feudal service, were indeed terrible enough. But the climax of infamy has been reached by our present &quot;law and order&quot; system, for it has defrauded more than nine-tenths of mankind of their means of existence, reduced them to dependence upon an insignificant [[Bourgeoisie|minority]], and condemned them to self-sacrifice. At the same time it has disguised this relation with all sorts of [[Ideology|jugglery]] that the thralls of today - the wage slaves - but partially recognize their serfdom and outlawed position, they rather incline to ascribe it to the caprices of fortune.

* Though not always united among themselves - one seeking to gain advantage over the other by tricks of trade, cunning in speculation and diverse machinations of competition - yet in opposition to the [[proletariat]] [[Bourgeoisie|they]] stand in one united hostile phalanx. 

* Should the unemployed apply a little of the much vaunted self-help, that is, should he do in a small way, what the rich do daily with impunity on a grand scale, should he, in fact, steal, in order to live - the bourgeoisie will heap burning coals of &quot;moral indignation&quot; upon his head, and, with austere visage, hand him over relentlessly in charge of the State, that in its prisons he may be fleeced the more effectively, i.e., cheaper.

* When the workers combine in order to obtain better wages, shorter hours of labor, or similar advantages, the money-bags immediately decry it as &quot;conspiracy&quot;, which must be prevented. ... When the workers organize politically, it is denounced as resistance to the &quot;divine&quot; order of things.

* Should the people finally contemplate rebellion, an unceasing howl of rage raised by the &quot;gold tigers&quot; will be heard throughout the world - their pant for massacres and their thirst for blood is insatiable.

* As the [[bourgeoisie]], by means of its [[capital]], completely monopolizes all new inventions, every new machine, instead of shortening the hours of labor and enhancing the prosperity and happiness of all, causes, on the contrary, dismissal from employment for some, reduction of wages for others and an increased and intensified state of misery for the entire proletariat.

* When increase of production is accompanied by an augmented pauperization of the masses, consumption must simultaneously decrease, stagnation and crises must ensue. A superabundance of actual wealth in the hands of the few must create hunger, typhus, and other epidemics among the many. The injustice - yea the idiocy - of this state of affairs is evident. The money-bags of course merely shrug their shoulders. This they will continue to do until a rope well tied over their shoulders will end all further shrugging.

* This is the lot of the poor from the cradle to the grave. Whether he produces or consumes, whether he exists or merely vegetates, he is always surrounded by ravenous vampires who thirst for his last drop of blood. 

* The rich man never stops his work of exploiting, though he may be utterly unable to assign a reason for his greed. He that has $1,000,000 would have $10,000,000; he that has $100,000,000 would have $1,000,000,000.

* Under the present capitalistic system venality is an all-pervading vice. 

* It is as a rule a mere matter of price which will buy over those who may be of service either by speech or silence, by pen or by press, by acts of violence or any other means, to the &quot;beast of property&quot; which by its golden dictates is the absolute, almighty divinity.

* In the schools strenuous attempts are made to nullify what little good the training in reading, writing, and ciphering may bring with it. Idiotic maltreatment of &quot;history&quot; excites that blatant prejudice which divides people, and prevents them from recognizing the fact that their oppressors have long ago leagued together against them, and that all politics, past and present, has the only object in view of firmly establishing the power of the rulers, and thereby ensuring exploitation of the poor by the rich.

* Whole squads of bushwackers are specially employed in mystifying the social question. The professors of political economy for instance, play the part of lackeys to the bourgeoisie, extolling the golden calf as the true sun of life, and using falsehood and knavery so &quot;scientifically&quot;, that they make the tanning of workingmen's hides appear as a benefaction to mankind. 

* While thus bamboozling the masses the capitalistic knights of plunder continue to perfect their mechanism of power. ... They command armies of soldiers, gendarmes, policemen, spies, judges, prison-keepers, toll-keepers, tax collectors, executors, etc.

* The State ... is evidently nothing more nor less than the political organization of a horde of swindlers and spoliators, who without the tyrannizing machinery could not exist for one day before the just wrath and condemnation of the oppressed and plundered people.

* In America the place of the monarchs is filled by the monopolists. ... All the wealth of this great republic, although established but a century, its mines, its coalfields, its oilwells, etc., etc., has been &quot;taken&quot; from the people and is the property of a handful of daring adventurers and cunning schemers.

* The &quot;sovereignty of the people&quot; falls prostrate into the dust before the influence of these money kings, railroad magnates, coal barons and factory lords. These fellows carry the whole United States in their pockets, and that which is vaunted as untrammeled legislation and free ballot is a farce, a delusion and a snare.

* Indeed it seems as though this young American republic had for the present but one historical mission, of demonstrating beyond controversy to the people on this side of the Atlantic as to those on the other by the presentation of bare, tangible facts what an outrageous monster the &quot;beast of property&quot; really is, and that neither the condition of the soil nor the vastness of domain, nor the political forms of society can ever alter the viciousness of this beast of prey.

* The less a necessity naturally exists for individual greed and rapacity, the more dangerous to, and obtrusive upon society it becomes. It is not voracious to satisfy its wants - it devours for the sake of devouring only!

* Let those who labor to live understand that this monster cannot be tamed, nor be made harmless or useful to man; let them learn to know that there is but one means of safety: unrelenting, pitiless, thorough war of extermination! Gentle overtures are for naught; scorn and derision will be the result, if by petitions, elections, and like silly attempts the proletariat hopes to command the respect of its sworn enemies.

* Education of the people will only then be possible, when the obstructions thereto have been removed. And that will not take place until the entire present system has been destroyed.

* Whoever has recognized the villainy of the present conditions, is in duty bound to raise his voice, in order to expose them, and thereby open the eyes of the people. 

* Scientific reflections ... tear the mask of humanity from the &quot;better class&quot; and disclose the hideous countenance of the beast of prey. 

* Whoever thus uses speech will be accused of inciting disturbance by the governing rabble; he will be bitterly hated and persecuted. This shows that the only possible and practical enlightenment must be of an inciting nature. Then let us incite!

* Let us show the people how it is swindled out of its labor force by country and city capitalists; how it is [[wikt:euchre#Verb|euchered]] out of its meagre wages by the house, store, and other lords; how priests of pulpit, press, and party seek to destroy its intellect; how a brutal police is ever ready to maltreat and tyrannize it, and with a soldiery to spill its blood. Patience, at last must forsake it! The people will rebel and crush its foes.

* The revolution of the proletariat - the war of the poor against the rich, is the only way from oppression to deliverance.

=== [[w:Pittsburgh Manifesto|Pittsburgh Manifesto]] (October 1883) ===
:&lt;small&gt;Drafted with [[Victor S. Drury]], [[Albert Parsons]], [[Joseph Reifgraber]] and [[August Spies]] ([https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/victor-drury-johann-most-albert-parsons-joseph-reifgraber-august-spies-manifesto-of-the-interna The Anarchist Library]). See also the text in ''Freiheit'' (27 Dec. 1890). Reprinted in Frederic Trautmann, ''The Voice of Terror: A Biography of Johann Most'' (Westport, CT: Greenwood Press, 1980), pp. 253-57&lt;/small&gt;

* What we would achieve is, therefore, plainly and simply,—{{pb}}''First'', Destruction of the existing class rule, by all means, i.e., by energetic, relentless, [[Revolution|revolutionary]], and [[World|international]] action.{{pb}}''Second'', Establishment of [[Social anarchism|a free society based upon co-operative organization of production]].{{pb}}''Third'', Free exchange of equivalent products by and between the productive organizations without [[Trade|commerce]] and [[Greed|profit-mongery]].{{pb}}''Fourth'', Organization of [[education]] on a [[Secularism|secular]], [[Science|scientific]], and equal basis for both sexes.{{pb}}''Fifth'', [[Human rights|Equal rights]] for all without distinction to [[Sexism|sex]] or [[Racism|race]].{{pb}}''Sixth'', Regulation of all public affairs by free contracts between the autonomous (independent) communes and associations, resting on a federalistic basis. {{pb}} Whoever agrees with this ideal let him grasp our outstretched brother hands! &lt;!-- (pb) [[Working class|Proletarians]] of all countries, unite!(pb)Fellow-workmen, all we need for the achievement of this great end is {{smallcaps|[[Organization|organization]]}} and {{smallcaps|[[Unity|unity]]}}.(pb)There exists now no great obstacle to that unity. The work of peaceful education and revolutionary conspiracy well can and ought to run in parallel lines.{{pb}}The day has come for solidarity. Join our ranks! Let the drum beat defiantly the roll of battle, &quot;Workmen of all lands, unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains; you have a world to win!&quot;(pb)Tremble, [[Oppression|oppressors]] of the world! Not far beyond your purblind sight there dawns the scarlet and sable lights of the Judgment Day. (The rest of this is essentially a paraphrase of Marx)--&gt;

==Quotes about Johann Most==

*The most outstanding leader was a German anarchist, Johann Most, who had been expelled from the Socialist ranks and had suffered imprisonment in Germany and England for his anarchist activities. He advocated violence in the overthrow of church and state and &quot;his ideal society was an agglomeration of loosely federated autonomous groups of producers.&quot;
**[[Mary Ritter Beard]] ''A Short History of the American Labor Movement'' (1920)

*My first impression of him was one of revulsion. He was of medium height, with a large head crowned with greyish bushy hair; but his face was twisted out of form by an apparent dislocation of the left jaw. Only his eyes were soothing; they were blue and sympathetic. His speech was a scorching denunciation of American conditions, a biting satire on the injustice and brutality of the dominant powers, a passionate tirade against those responsible for the Haymarket tragedy and the execution of the Chicago anarchists in November 1887. He spoke eloquently and picturesquely. As if by magic, his disfigurement disappeared, his lack of physical distinction was forgotten. He seemed transformed into some primitive power, radiating hatred and love, strength and inspiration. The rapid current of his speech, the music of his voice, and his sparkling wit, all combined to produce an effect almost overwhelming. He stirred me to my depths.
**[[Emma Goldman]], ''Living My Life (1931)''

*He was a gracious host, an attentive and sympathetic friend. He made me tell him about myself and he grew thoughtful when he learned the motive that had decided me to break with my old life. He warned me to reflect carefully before taking the plunge. &quot;The path of anarchism is steep and painful,&quot; he said; &quot;so many have attempted to climb it and have fallen back. The price is exacting. Few men are ready to pay it, most women not at all.&quot; [...] I inquired whether the anarchist movement in America had no outstanding woman. &quot;None at all, only stupids,&quot; he replied; &quot;most of the girls come to the meetings to snatch up a man; then both vanish, like the silly fishermen at the lure of the Lorelei.&quot; There was a roguish twinkle in his eye. He didn't believe much in woman's revolutionary zeal. But I, coming from Russia, might be different and he would help me. If I were really in earnest, I could find much work to do. &quot;There is great need in our ranks of young, willing people-ardent ones, as you seem to be-and I have need of ardent friendship,&quot; he added with much feeling. &quot;You?&quot; I questioned; &quot;you have thousands in New York-all over the world. You are loved, you are idolized.&quot; &quot;Yes, little girl, idolized by many, but loved by none. One can be very lonely among thousands-did you know that?&quot;
**[[Emma Goldman]], ''Living My Life (1931)''

*My own long struggle to find my bearings, the disillusionments and disappointments I had experienced, had made me less dogmatic in my demands on people than I had been. They had helped me to understand the hard and lonely life of the rebel who had fought for an unpopular cause. Whatever bitterness I had felt against my old teacher had given way to deep sympathy long before his death.
**[[Emma Goldman]], ''Living My Life (1931)''

*Originally followers of Johann Most, [[Emma Goldman]] and [[Alexander Berkman]] emerged from his shadow in the early nineties to become the foremost advocates of revolutionary anarchism.
**Margaret S Marsh, ''Anarchist Women, 1870-1920'' (1981)

*From the mid-seventies onward, organized feminism had become increasingly decorous. [[Matilda Joslyn Gage]], after all, was forced to go outside the organized movement to find a platform for her anticlerical views, and the venerable but always irreverent [[Elizabeth Cady Stanton]] found herself out-flanked and outvoted by her more conventional sisters. While feminism moved toward respectability, anarchism, at least in the public view, became increasingly radical. Partly because of the fiery rhetoric of Johann Most and his admirers, and partly because of antiforeign sentiment, the anarchist came to be viewed as a symbol of irrational violence. The public image of the anarchist was that of a deranged terrorist.
**Margaret S Marsh, ''Anarchist Women, 1870-1920'' (1981)

*Sexual egalitarianism was almost as rare among the communists. Certainly the position of Johann Most tended toward outright misogyny.
**Margaret S Marsh, ''Anarchist Women, 1870-1920'' (1981)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Most, Johann}}
[[Category:Politicians from Germany]]
[[Category:Politicians from the United States]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors  from Germany]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors  from the United States]]
[[Category:Anarchists from the United States]]
[[Category:Marxists from the United States]]
[[Category:Revolutionaries]]
[[Category:Atheists from the United States]]
[[Category:Editors from the United States]]
[[Category:Orators from the United States]]
[[Category:Jews from Germany]]
[[Category:Jews from the United States]]
[[Category:Immigrants to the United States]]
[[Category:1846 births]]
[[Category:1906 deaths]]
[[Category:People from Bavaria]]</text>
      <sha1>ca8fj0349wuxo7cf44b5zs971k9224o</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Maggie and the Ferocious Beast</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>212088</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965079</id>
      <parentid>3960126</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:58:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39665-26</username>
        <id>3350126</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965079</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="7522" sha1="3yab46q6wbe10qoyan1zniawrk0b40a" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Maggie and the Ferocious Beast|Maggie and the Ferocious Beast]]''''' is a Canadian [[w:Animated series|animated]] [[w:children's television series|children's television series]] created by [[w:Michael Paraskevas|Michael]] and [[w:Betty Paraskevas|Betty Paraskevas]]. The program was based on the 1996 book ''The Ferocious Beast with the Polka-Dot Hide'' and its sequels, all of which were also written by the Paraskevases.
 
The show began as a series of shorts aired on the Canadian channel [[w:Teletoon|Teletoon]] in 1998. The first full length episode premiered on June 5, 2000.

==Theme song==
:''[The theme song starts with Maggie's map. Maggie colors the last of Beast's spots and the map begin to shake. The birds fly out of the map and Beast comes to life]''
:'''Maggie''': ''♪ Maggie and the Ferocious Beast in Nowhere Land ♪''
:''♪ To Nowhere Land ♪''
:''♪ Come along if you can. ♪''
:''[Hamilton pops out of his box]''
:'''Maggie''': ''♪ Hey ho, ♪''
:''♪ Come on, let's go ♪''
:''♪ To Nowhere Land. ♪''
:''[Hamilton fell out of his box and Maggie helps him get up]''
:'''Maggie''': ''♪ With Maggie and the Ferocious Beast. ♪''
:'''Beast''': ''[off-screen]'' Great googly moogly!

==Episodes==
===Pack Up Your Troubles / Rub a Dub Dub / The Big Carrot===

===My One and Only Box / Spot the Spot / Recipe for Trouble===
:'''Maggie''': 1.
:'''Hamilton''': 2.
:'''Maggie''': 3.
:'''Hamilton''': 4.
:''[Maggie sees one look of Beast's stomach and thinks for a while]''
:'''Maggie''': ''[sticks her tongue out]'' Hmm.
:''[Maggie touches Beast's stomach and tickles him. Beast bursts out a laugh and Maggie also laughs in joy. Hamilton walks to Maggie that she should continue to count]''
:'''Hamilton''': ''[to Maggie that she could keep counting]'' Four, Maggie.
:'''Maggie''': ''[laughing; to Hamilton]'' Just a second, Hamilton.
:''[Maggie tickles Beast once more as Beast let's out a big laugh]''
:'''Maggie''': ''[laughing]'' Five.
:''[Beast keeps laughing as Maggie tickles him]''

===The Lemonade Stand / Walk the Walk / What's in a Laugh?===

===Out of Water Beast / Rain, Rain, Come and Stay! / Hamilton the Ham===

===Louder! Louder! / Once Upon a Time / Maggie the Mommy===

===This Little Pig / Hide and Go Beast/ One, Two, Three===

===What's In The Bag? / Beastly Picture / The Push-Me Popper===

===Sun Spots / Say Cheese / Sailing Away===
:'''Maggie''': ''[sighs]'' Aren't you two ready yet?
:'''Hamilton''': ''[pops out of his box; to Maggie]'' I'm still packing!
:'''Maggie''': But we're just going to the beach.
:'''Hamilton''': Well, I don't want to forget anything! ''[went back inside]''
:'''Beast''': ''[to Hamilton]'' Remember to pack my sunglasses, and my sandals, and my favourite blue towel, oh, and my pail and...
:'''Maggie''': ''[snapped]'' That’s enough! Come on, let's go!
:'''Hamilton''': ''[comes out of his box carrying his green bag and umbrella]'' All right, all right! ''[throws the bag and it lands on Beast's back]'' I'm ready.
:''[Hamilton puts his umbrella on Beast and climbs up. He gets his umbrella and Beast turns to a different direction. Maggie hops on Beast and she's also ready]''
:'''Maggie''': To the beach!
:'''Beast and Hamilton''': To the beach!
:''[The trio leaves Hamilton's box and they all head to the beach]''

&lt;hr width=50% /&gt;
:''[When they got to the beach; Maggie plants the umbrella and puts it on this spot. Hamilton, however got the green towel out of the bag and puts it on the sandy beach. He gets out a bottle of sunscreen and squirts it on his hand. Hamilton puts some sunscreen on and so does Maggie]''
:'''Beast''': ''[runs to the water]'' I'm going in!
:''[Two seagulls are playing volleyball until they see Beast coming. They quickly flew away before Beast crashes into them. Beast jumps in to the water]''
:'''Maggie''': ''[to Beast]'' Don't forget to put on some sun block!
:'''Beast''': I don't like that stuff. It smells funny.
:'''Maggie''': But you should still put it on! ''[holds the sunscreen bottle]''
:'''Beast''': I will after I swim, okay?
:'''Maggie''': Okay, but don't forget.

===Three Little Ghosts / The King of Nowhere Land / The Big Scare===

===Hamilton's Pet / Slooow Motion / The Big Duck===

===Flim-Flam-A Fiddle / A Beastly Garden / Spring Cleaning===
:'''Beast''': ''[sees one of his spots stuck in Hamilton's vacuum cleaner]'' My spot!
:'''Hamilton''': My vacuum cleaner!
:'''Maggie''': ''[covering her ears]'' My ears!

===Mr. Shivers / Nap Time / Up, Up, and Away===

===Hamilton's Box Car / Happy Birthday to All of Us / The Really Big Show===
:'''Beast''': ''[sees Maggie coming]'' Oh, good, here's Maggie (right now). Now we can go to the beach. ''[waves to Maggie]'' Hi, Maggie!
:'''Maggie''': ''[arrives carrying a picnic basket]'' Hi, Beast! Where's Hamilton? ''[hears a squeaking sound]'' And what's that noise?
:'''Beast''': ''[shows Maggie the direction to where Hamilton is]'' He's over there. ''[a sawing noise is heard off-screen]'' And he doesn't want to be distributed.
:'''Hamilton''': ''[off-screen]'' Hi, Maggie! ''[on-screen holing a hammer]'' I'm making something.
:'''Maggie''': May I see it?
:'''Hamilton''': ''[rushes to tell his friends that it's a surprise because they can't spoil it]'' No, no! Don't come over here! It's a surprise! ''[went back to work]''
:'''Maggie''': Do you know what it is, Beast?
:'''Beast''': ''[yawns]'' No! He's been back there all day. He won't tell me what's he doing, and he won't let me see anything.
:'''Maggie''': ''[calls out to Hamilton]'' Come on, Hamilton! Show us what you're making!
:'''Hamilton''': ''[off-screen]'' In a minute! ''[finishes his surprise off-screen]'' All right. Get ready. Here I come! ''[on-screen arrives with his box car]'' Vroom! ''[drives his box car]'' Hoo-whee!
:'''Beast''': ''[seeing Hamilton driving his box car]'' Great googly moogly.
:'''Hamilton''': ''[stops his box car]'' Well, what do you think?
:'''Maggie''': Gee, Hamilton, it's beautiful!
:'''Hamilton''': Beast, what do you think?
:'''Beast''': It's very nice.
:'''Maggie''': May I drive it?
:'''Hamilton''': Maybe someday, but right now I'm still breaking it in.
:'''Maggie''': Oh, all right. ''[walks away]''

&lt;hr width=50% /&gt;
:''[when Maggie and Beast got to the beach, Beast doesn't see Hamilton with his box car just yet]''
:'''Beast''': I don't see Hamilton.
:'''Maggie''': ''[hops off Beast's back]'' He's probably still driving. ''[takes off her clothes]'' Come on! 
:''[Maggie takes off her yellow shirt revealing her bathing suit. She laughs for joy and starts taking off her shoes and socks]''
:'''Maggie''': ''[laughing as she runs to the water]'' Whee!
:''[Beast looks at two directions and went into the water to join with Maggie]''

==Cast==
* Kristen Bone as Maggie
* Stephen Ouimette as Beast
* Michael Caruana as Hamilton Hocks

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Canadian children's animated education TV shows]]
[[Category:TV shows based on children's books]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Treehouse TV shows]]
[[Category:Teletoon original series]]
[[Category:Nick Jr. shows]]
[[Category:Qubo shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:TV shows about pigs]]
[[Category:TV shows about mice and rats]]
[[Category:TV shows about rabbits and hares]]
[[Category:TV shows about cows]]</text>
      <sha1>3yab46q6wbe10qoyan1zniawrk0b40a</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Flintstones &amp; WWE: Stone Age SmackDown!</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>212952</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965137</id>
      <parentid>3903955</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:13:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965137</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2604" sha1="j9guu224ntm9kjqx8rmavnuwm865auq" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|The Flintstones &amp; WWE: Stone Age SmackDown!}}''''' is a 2015 American direct-to-video animated film starring The Flintstones. It is the second co-production between Warner Bros. Animation and WWE Studios following ''[[Scooby-Doo! WrestleMania Mystery]]''. The film features Fred Flintstone, Barney Rubble and the whole Bedrock gang with stone age versions of WWE Superstars and Divas. It was released on March 10, 2015, by Warner Home Video.

==Dialogue==
:'''Fred''': We can put on another one of those crazy matches, and Judge wants to come and see it.
:'''Barney''': I pay harder and clams to see that.
:'''Fred''': The main event is gonna be a rematch between you, and CM Punkrock.
:'''Barney''': What?
:'''CM Punkrock''': I am the best in the prehistoric world!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Vince''': Flintstone, you've got yourself something real special here.
:'''Fred''': Thanks, Mr. McMagma.
:'''Vince''': I felt like I can make a lot of clams for the spectacle like that.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''John Cena-stone''': No, I don't!
:'''Daniel Bry-rock''': Yes, I can!
:'''John Cena-stone''': No, you're not!
:'''Daniel Bry-rock''': I said, yes, I do. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
:'''Flintstone''': ?
:'''Jon Cena-stone''': I am say, no.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Fred''': There's nothing to worry about, sweetheart.
:'''Wilma''': When Fred says &quot;don't worry&quot;, I start worrying.
:'''Pebbles''': Yep.

==Cast==
* Jeff Bergman as Fred Flintstone
* Kevin Michael Richardson as Barney Rubble
* Tress MacNeille as Wilma Flintstone
* Grey Griffin as Betty Rubble
* [[w:Eric Bauza|Eric Bauza]] as Bamm-Bamm Rubble, Dino, Hoppy
* John O'Hurley as Mr. Slate
* [[w:Russi Taylor|Russi Taylor]] as Pebbles Flintstone
* Brie Bella as Brie Boulder
* Nikki Bella as Nikki Boulder
* [[Daniel Bryan]] as Daniel Bryrock
* [[John Cena]] as John Cenastone
* Mark Henry as Marble Henry
* [[Vince McMahon|Mr. McMahon]] as Mr. McMagma
* Rey Mysterio as Rey Mysteriopal
* CM Punk as CM Punkrock
* Seth Rogen as Freddie Fardstone

==External links==
* {{IMDb title|2948202|The Flintstones &amp; WWE: Stone Age SmackDown!}}
{{wikipedia}}

{{The Flintstones}}

{{Authority control}}


{{DEFAULTSORT:Flintstones &amp; WWE: Stone Age SmackDown!}}
[[Category:2015 animated films]]
[[Category:2010s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:Animated sports films]]
[[Category:The Flintstones films]]
[[Category:Direct-to-video animated films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Tony Cervone]]
[[Category:Films directed by Spike Brandt]]</text>
      <sha1>j9guu224ntm9kjqx8rmavnuwm865auq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Santa Fe, New Mexico</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>214717</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965069</id>
      <parentid>3941736</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:51:21Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965069</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="14238" sha1="30nhw6il4bnga9dft13ejlnd4ydo3te" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Santa Fe NM.jpg|thumb|A view of Santa Fe, New Mexico]]
[[File:Santa Fe, New Mexico Montage 1.png|thumb|A montage of Santa Fe]]
'''{{w|Santa Fe, New Mexico}}''' ({{w|Tewa language}}: ''Oghá P'o'oge'', {{w|Navajo language}}: ''Yootó'') is the capital of the U.S. state of [[w:New Mexico|New Mexico]]. Founded by Spanish colonists in 1610, it is the oldest state capital in the United States. It is the fourth-largest city in the state and the county seat of {{w|Santa Fe County, New Mexico}}.

== Quotes ==

=== ''[[Commerce of the Prairies]]'' (1844) ===
:&lt;small&gt;'': or, The journal of a Santa Fé trader, 1831–1839'' [https://books.google.com/books?id=6NwaAAAAMAAJ Vol 2], by [[Josiah Gregg]]&lt;/small&gt;

* The Santa Fé caravans have generally avoided every manner of trade with the wild Indians, for fear of being treacherously dealt with during the familiar intercourse which necessarily ensues. This I am convinced is an erroneous impression; for I have always found, that [natives] are much less hostile to those with whom they trade, than to any other people. They are emphatically fond of traffic, and, being anxious to encourage the whites to come among them, instead of committing depredations upon those with whom they trade, they are generally ready to defend them against every enemy.
* [https://books.google.com/books?id=6NwaAAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA46 p. 46]

* As regards the two different routes to Santa Fé, although Missouri, for various reasons... can doubtless retain the monopoly of the Santa Fé trade, the route from Arkansas possesses many advantages. Besides its being some days travel shorter, it is less intersected with large streams; there are fewer sandy stretches, and a greater variety of wood-skirted brooks, affording throughout the journey very agreeable camping-places. Also, as the grass springs up nearly a month earlier than in Upper Missouri, caravans could start much sooner, and the proprietors would have double the time to conduct their mercantile transactions. Moreover, the return companies would find better pasturage on their way back, and reach their homes before the season of frost had far advanced. Again, such as should desire to engage in the 'stock trade' would at once bring their mules and horses into a more congenial climate—one more in accordance with that of their nativity; for the rigorous winters of Missouri often prove fatal to the unacclimated Mexican animals.
* [https://books.google.com/books?id=6NwaAAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA155 p. 155]

* The following is the substance of [[w:Antonio López de Santa Anna|Santa Anna]]'s decree, dated at his Palace of Tacubaya August 7, 1843:&lt;br /&gt;&quot;Article 1st. The frontier custom-houses of [[w:Taos, New Mexico|Taos]], in the department of New Mexico, [[w:Ciudad Juárez|Paso del Norte]] and Presidio del Norte in that of [[w:Chihuahua (state)|Chihuahua]], are entirely closed to all commerce.&quot;&lt;br /&gt;&quot;Art 2d. This decree shall take effect within forty-five days after its publication in the capital of the Republic.&lt;br /&gt;It should be understood that the only port in New Mexico for the introduction of foreign goods was nominally Taos, though the custom-house was at Santa Fé, where all the entrances were made. These northern ports have since been reopened by decree of March 31, 1844...
** [https://books.google.com/books?id=6NwaAAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA177 p. 177]

=== ''Two Thousand Miles on Horseback: Santa Fé and Back'' (1868) ===
:&lt;small&gt;''A Summer Tour Through Kansas, Nebraska, Colorados, and New Mexico, in the Year 1866'' by James F. Meline, Letter XXII, [https://books.google.com/books?id=B_BQAQAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA151 pp. 151-157]&lt;/small&gt;

* The population of Santa Fé is about 5000. I should say that was the maximum.

* The Plaza, some three hundred and fifty feet square, was an open space of mud and dust, until the advent of the Americans in 1846.

* On the north side of the Plaza is the palace; the governor's palace, if you please; a long adobe, one story high, and one or two rooms deep. Notwithstanding the American portico in front, it has the aspect and general effect of a dilapidated rope-walk.

* The three remaining sides of the square are occupied by the principal stores of the place, [[w:La Fonda on the Plaza|the ''fonda'']], or hotel, and the inevitable saloon, coffee-house, and billiard-room, where los Americanos most do congregate.

* Two streets, of American breadth, run from the east and west side of the Plaza, to the hills bounding the town on the north ; on one of which, to the east, are the ruins of [[w:Fort Marcy (New Mexico)|Fort Marcy]], built in 1846.

* Houses alternate with wheat and corn fields that grow larger as you reach the edge of the town, and, in separate ranches, finally melt into fields and vegas until you reach the sandy desert a few miles below. A refreshing feature of Santa Fé is made by the ''acequias'' or streams of running water used for irrigation, which pleasantly, and in unexpected places, ripple and babble at your feet as you wander through the town.

* The most striking animated feature of Santa Fé is found in the strings or droves of donkeys, burros, who are at once the cart, carriage, saddle-horse, draught-horse, wagon, buggy, [[wiktionary:stanhope#Noun|stanhope]], [[wiktionary:droshky#English|drosky]], jaunting-car, [[wiktionary:kalesa#English|calesa]], sled, sleigh, furniture-car, [[wiktionary:dray#Noun|dray]], and wheelbarrow, of the Mexican. They bring in incredible loads of marketing... Patient, docile, gentle, and long-suffering, living on next to nothing, they comprise, to the Mexican, the wealth of the Arab in his camel, the Bedouin in his horse, the Peruvian in his llama, the Icelander in his reindeer, and the Irishman in his pig.

* More than one half the butter used here comes from the land whence, in New Mexico, every thing good is believed to come, namely, &quot; The States.&quot; ...The Pueblo Indians bring in fruit, trout, and game from the mountains, and, also, nearly the sole industrial productions of the country,—jars, dishes, and cups of pottery, some of it painted so as to impart an almost Etruscan or Egyptian air.

* Piñones, the fruit of the nut-bearing pine (''{{w|Pinus}} monophyllus''), are brought in slightly dried by baking. The people make bread of them. ''Chile verde'' and ''chile Colorado'', our green and red pepper, ''queso'' (cheese), onions, ''punchi'', an inferior tobacco, which grows much higher than our tobacco, mostly used by the women, who, with ''hojas'' (cornhusks), neatly cut and trimmed, make their cigaritos at home, in the street, at the theatre or halls, and smoke them, too, then and there. The ''chile'' is not used as a mere condiment or seasoning, but as a dish. This and the onion are of a mildness and sweetness that make them different vegetables from ours. The onions are of great size. I like them. ...and when I get married I intend to have ''chile colorado'' frequently. ...I hope she 'll like the ''chile colorado''.

=== ''[[Narrative of the Texan Santa Fé Expedition]]'' (1884) ===
:&lt;small&gt;''Comprising a Description of a Tour Through Texas, and Across the Great Southwestern Prairies, the Comanche and Caygüa Hunting-Grounds, With an Account of the Sufferings from Want of Food, Losses from Hostile Indians, and Final Capture of the Texans, and Their March, as Prisoners, to the City of Mexico'', by {{w|George Wilkins Kendall}}.&lt;/small&gt;

* While canvassing the chances and merits of a trip of this kind, I met with Major George T. Howard, then in New-Orleans purchasing goods for the [[w:Texas Santa Fe Expedition|Texan Santa Fé Expedition]]. ...Major Howard informed me that it was commercial in its intentions, the policy of the then President of [[w:Republic of Texas|Texas]], General [[w:Mirabeau B. Lamar|Mirabeau B. Lamar]], being to open a direct trade with [[w:Santa Fe, New Mexico|Santa Fé]] by a route known to be much nearer than the great Missouri trail. To divert this trade was certainly the primary and ostensible object; but that General Lamar had an ulterior intention—that of bringing so much of the province of New Mexico as lies upon the eastern or Texan side of the Rio Grande under the protection of his government—I did not know until I was upon the march to Santa Fé.
** Vol. 1, Ch. 1, [https://books.google.com/books?id=sU8VAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA14 p.14-15.]

* The effects of the central form of government were now just beginning to be felt in this isolated department of Mexico, and the people were beginning to manifest no inconsiderable discontent at the new order of things. [[w:Manuel Armijo|Armijo]], perceiving that there was now a chance, not only to signalize himself, but to reap a rich harvest of revenge against his enemies then in power, took advantage of this feeling by secretly fomenting a conspiracy. An insurrection was soon in agitation and early in August, 1837, a heterogeneous force numbering more than one thousand men, among whom were a large number of ''pueblos'' or town Indians, assembled at [[w:Santa Cruz, New Mexico|La Cañada]], a village about twenty-five miles north of the capital. [[w:Albino Pérez|Governor Perez]] conducted a small force against the insurgeats; but a majority of his men went over at the outset, leaving him with only twenty-five personal friends to contend with odds the most fearful. ...fourteen of them, including all the officers of state, were most inhumanly put to death. Among the slain were three brothers named Abreu: Governor Perez was also butchered in the suburbs of Santa Fé, his head cut off, and kicked about the streets by the populace. His body remained where it had fallen, a prey to the vultures and wolves, no friend daring to offer it [[wiktionary:sepulture#Noun|sepulture]]!
** Vol.1, Chapter XVI, [https://books.google.com/books?id=sU8VAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA348 pp. 348-349.]

=== ''[[Historical Sketch of the Catholic Church in New Mexico]]'' (1887) ===
:&lt;small&gt;by most reverend, James H. Defouri (Catholic priest), [https://books.google.com/books?id=PQ0ZAAAAYAAJ source.]&lt;/small&gt;

* In 1692, a new expedition was entrusted to [[w:Diego de Vargas|Don Diego de Vargas Zapate Lujan]], by the Viceroy, Count Galvas. ......Diego de Vargas deserves more than a passing notice. It has been said that he was an avaricious and ambitious man. It is true that later on, when he had conquered all the Pueblos, and placed them under the Spanish rule, he seemed to incline to those vices, but he was a man of faith, feared by the Indians who remained his enemies, but kind and generous to those who acknowledged his rule. ...Vargas carried everywhere with him a statue of the [[Mary, mother of Jesus|Blessed Virgin Mary]], and wherever he stopped, a little sanctuary was built, and devotions were offered by the army. We may meet yet several of those places, called by the people ''los palacios'', among others one near [[w:Agua Fria, New Mexico|Agua Fria]], five miles west of Santa Fé. He entered the city by the road called ''El camino de Vargas'', and stood with his troops near the church of {{w|Our Lady of Guadalupe}}. Thence crossing the [[w:Santa Fe River (New Mexico)|Rio Santa Fe]] at a place called yet—Puente de Vargas, he went to the very spot where now stands the Chapel of Our Lady of the Rosary, and there he erected a ''palacio''. On the next day... Vargas with his small troop, attacked the Indians, who were centered on a waste which is now the beautiful plaza of Santa Fé; they had fortified themselves, and were reinforced by the neighboring pueblos, to the number of ten thousand. The battle raged with great ardor on both sides from four in the morning until nightfall, without apparent result. Then Vargas, in the name of his troops on their bended knees, before the statue of Mary, made the solemn vow, that should he take the city, every year that same statue should be brought in solemn procession from the principal church in the city to the spot on which they were camping, where he should build a sanctuary, and there be left for nine days, the people flocking to the chapel to thank Mary for this victory, attributed to her. On the dawn of day, the next morning, he attacked with impetuosity the fortified Indians, and drove them from the plaza; at eight o'clock they retired upon the ''loma'', north of the city where he attacked them, and by noon not an Indian was seen in the neighborhood.&lt;br /&gt;Faithful to his promise, Vargas built the Sanctuary of Our Lady of the Rosary, and the fulfilment of the vow, commenced then, still continues every year on the Sunday after the Octave of Corpus Christi, by carrying what is most probably the identical statue possessed by Vargas, and called by the people Nuestra Senora de la Victoria, &quot;Our Lady of the Victory,&quot; in great pomp, with music and pious chanting, from the Cathedral of St. Francis to the Chapel of the Rosary, and for nine days mass is chanted there, all the people making daily pilgrimages in thanksgiving for the favor received.
** Ch. III. The Great Revolt of 1680, pp. 14-15.

* It was this dissatisfaction of a part of the people of New Mexico, which gave rise to the famous [[Narrative of the Texan Santa Fé Expedition|Texas-Santa Fe expedition]], which terminated so disastrously for the Texans. ...Many of those who composed it had nothing else in view than trading, and brought a great amount of merchandise. But this was not the view of [[w:Mirabeau B. Lamar|General Lamar]], the President of the &quot;[[w:Republic of Texas|Lone Star republic]].&quot; Texas claimed the Rio Grande as her western boundary; many in that eastern half of New Mexico, seemed to desire their coming and throw off the galling yoke of Mexico, and Lamar with his associates, who kept their secret, wished these young men to reduce Santa Fé under the rule of Texas. All know how they were roughly handled by [[w:Manuel Armijo|General Armijo]], when, after untold hardships, they were met at Apache Canon, made prisoners, and, tied together like cattle, sent to the city of Mexico.
** Ch. VI. Religious State of New Mexico under the Mexican Rule, pp. 28-29.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* [https://www.santafenm.gov/ City of Santa Fe] official website

[[Category:State capitals of the United States]]
[[Category:New Mexico]]</text>
      <sha1>30nhw6il4bnga9dft13ejlnd4ydo3te</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rwanda</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>214833</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965155</id>
      <parentid>3958251</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:24:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3965155</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5616" sha1="sju7u46tjvdvew8m7izjhu9dq1ngoax" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Flag of Rwanda.svg|thumb|Flag of Rwanda]]
[[File:Hymne National du Rwanda.ogg|thumb|National Hymne of Rwanda]]
[[File:LocationRwanda.svg|thumb|Location of Rwanda]]
'''[[w:Rwanda|Rwanda]]''', officially the '''Republic of Rwanda''', is a [[w:landlocked country|landlocked country]] in [[:East Africa|East Africa]]. It is known as the &quot;Land of a Thousand Hills&quot; for its high elevation and rolling terrain. Located a few degrees south of the [[w:Equator|Equator]], Rwanda is bordered by [[Uganda]], [[Tanzania]], [[Burundi]], and the [[Democratic Republic of the Congo]]. The climate is temperate to subtropical, with two rainy seasons and two dry seasons each year. [[Rwanda]] has a population of over 12.9 million people of which a million live in the [[w:Capital city|capital]] and largest city [[w:Kigali|Kigali]].

{{geography-stub}}

==Quotes==
* I know there is a God because in Rwanda I shook hands with the devil.
** [[w:Romeo Dallaire|Romeo Dallaire]], as quoted in [https://legionmagazine.com/en/2016/03/dallaire-and-ngeze/ &quot;Dallaire and Ngeze&quot;] (1 March 2016), by Mark Zuehlke, ''Legion: Canada's Military History Magazine''

* Rwanda is a classic case of conflict-generated [[refugees]] leading to a refugee-generated conflict.
** [[w:Gerald Caplan|Gerald Caplan]], [https://utppublishing.com/doi/10.3138/gsi.12.2.03 &quot;Rethinking the Rwandan Narrative for the 25th Anniversary&quot;] ''Genocide Studies International'' Volume 12, Number 2 (April 2019)

* There's a [[Rwandan proverb]]: &quot;A message is given to many, but those who are meant to understand, understand.&quot; There's always a subtext in Rwanda. You don't have to resort to brutal language. People understand.
** [[w:Alison Des Forges|Alison Des Forges]], as quoted in [http://archive.is/RFw7W#selection-789.199-789.277 &quot;Killer Songs&quot;] (17 March 2002), by Donald G. McNeil, Jr., ''The New York Times''

* Nothing prepares you for Rwanda. Kigali feels serene, orderly, and almost disarmingly peaceful. Yet beneath that calm lies a [[memory]] so vast that it seems to change the very air around you. … [https://bitterwinter.org/tai-ji-men-and-the-tai-ji-men-case-a-background/ The Tai Ji Men case] is not Rwanda. But Rwanda teaches us that no society is immune to [[injustice]]. The Rome Model shows us that injustice grows if left unchecked. [[Óscar Romero|The lesson of March 24]] is that [[truth]] is the first step toward restoring [[dignity]].
** [[Massimo Introvigne]], [https://bitterwinter.org/gross-human-rights-violations-from-rwanda-to-taiwan/ &quot;Gross Human Rights Violations: From Rwanda to Taiwan&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (March 24-25, 2026)

* '''The lesson of Rwanda is not that every [[moral panic]] leads to [[genocide]]. It is that every genocide begins with a moral panic.''' The lesson for today is that the spiral of intolerance, once set in motion, can have unpredictable and devastating consequences. Whether the target is an ethnic minority or a religious movement labeled a “cult,” the [[logic]] is the same. And the responsibility to break the spiral before it reaches its final stage belongs to all of us. Words matter, narratives matter, and the defense of human dignity begins with resisting the first step on the slippery slope.
** [[Massimo Introvigne]], [https://bitterwinter.org/how-media-generate-violence-from-rwanda-to-anti-cult-campaigns-2-hate-speech-against-cults/ &quot;How Media Generate Violence, From Rwanda to Anti-Cult Campaigns. 2. Hate Speech Against “Cults”&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (June 30, 2026)

* I am sometimes asked to name the thing that most scares me about Rwanda. My answer is this: It frightens me to death when my countrymen are not talking. If a Rwandan is brooding you never know what he is thinking.
** [[w:Paul Rusesabagina|Paul Rusesabagina]], [https://www.amazon.com/Ordinary-Man-Autobiography-Paul-Rusesabagina/dp/0143038605 ''An Ordinary Man''] (2006), Chapter 11

* &lt;p&gt;&quot;For the responsibility incumbent on him in this genocide in Rwanda and which he cannot discard either on others or on the whole of the national community, he ([[François Mitterrand|M. Mitterrand]]) is part of the sinister club of hell surnames of the 20th century, of those genocidaires who are synonymous with absolute abomination.&quot;&lt;/p&gt;
** [[w:Jean-Pierre Thiollet|Jean-Pierre Thiollet]], ''Hallier Edernellement vôtre'', Neva Editions (2019), p. 71. ISBN 978-2-35055-273-6.

* Not surprisingly, relations between Burundi and Rwanda have soured in the meantime, while Rwanda openly presents itself as &quot;the protector of the Burundian people against their murderous president&quot; and regularly suggests that it might intervene with its neighbours.
** [https://www.vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/2015/12/19/naar_een_nieuwe_genocideinburundi-peterverlinden-1-2527426/ Towards a new genocide in Burundi? - Peter Verlinden]

* Which countries have the most women in parliament?: Country  (%) 1 Rwanda 63.8 
** [[w:World Economic Forum|World Economic Forum]] [https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2015/09/countries-most-women-in-parliament/  Which countries have the most women in parliament?] (Sep 1, 2015)

== See also ==
*[[Ruanda-Urundi]]
*[[Burundi]]

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons category}}

* [http://www.gov.rw/ The Republic of Rwanda] (official government site)
* [https://www.cia.gov/the-world-factbook/countries/rwanda/ Rwanda]. ''The World Factbook''. [[Central Intelligence Agency]].
* {{cite web|title=Rwanda Convention Bureau|url=https://www.micemag.com/rwanda-convention-bureau/}}
* [http://www.visitrwanda.com/ Rwanda Tourism] (official Rwanda Tourism Board site)
*{{Wikivoyage-inline}}

[[Category:Rwanda| ]]</text>
      <sha1>sju7u46tjvdvew8m7izjhu9dq1ngoax</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Melody Time</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>214875</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965112</id>
      <parentid>3964687</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:44:14Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39761-76</username>
        <id>3350144</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965112</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5704" sha1="ejcy4mdxb0gfdhumw4qq5flbvcujr3b" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Melody Time|Melody Time]]''''' is a 1948 American [[w:Live-action animated film|hybrid]] film produced by [[Walt Disney]]. It is made up of six segments set to [[w:popular music|popular music]] and [[w:folk music|folk music]].
{{center|'''For Your All-Time Good Time!'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]}}
{{center|'''The Chawhee Brain wants the sleigh horses! Everytime, Once Upon A Wintertime, Very Merry Christmas Songs, and Duck The Halls! Ever since he was born!'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]}}
{{center|'''Beware the sex offenders from Once Upon A Wintertime!'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]}}
{{center|'''I want Once Upon A Wintertime to get out of my life forever!'''[[#Taglines|taglines]]}}

==The Master of Ceremonies==
* ''[introduction to &quot;Bumble Boogie&quot;]'' Freddy Martin, an admirer of the classics, inspired by Rimsky-Korsakov's &quot;Flight of the Bumblebee&quot;, interprets this fantasy in his unique style. In a furious flight, a confused character tries to escape from the hectic harmony of an instrumental nightmare 
* ''[introduction to &quot;The Legend of Johnny Appleseed&quot;]'' In American folklore, mighty men have left the symbols of their greatness. There was Paul Bunyan's axe. John Henry's hammer. Davy Crockett's rifle. Then, unexpectedly, one comes upon a tinpot hat, a bag of appleseed and a holy book. These are the symbols of one of the mightiest men of all, John Chapman, a real-life pioneer. However, reality has given way to legend. Today, we know him simply as Johnny Appleseed. This is his story, told by an old settler who knew Johnny well. Listen. Every time I see an apple-blossom sky, I think of Johnny Appleseed. Them clouds up there ain't really clouds at all, no, sir! There wouldn't be no apple-blossom sky if it weren't for...But now, hold on here. I'd better start at the beginning. Johnny lived on a farm near [[w:Pittsburgh|Pittsburgh]]. The year was 1806 or there around. You'd say Johnny Appleseed never would make a pioneer, he was such a scrawny little fellow. That didn't faze Johnny. He had his apple trees, the morning sun and the evening breeze. 
* ''[introduction to &quot;Little Toot&quot;]'' There's drama, there's excitement, and there's harmony for three in a story of adventure on the sea. Now, featured in this epic is a ship of proud design. No, it's not this ocean liner. We take a different line. So with a huff and a puff and a chug-chug-chug, and a perky little hoot, we introduce our hero, the tugboat, Little Toot.
* ''[introduction to &quot;Trees&quot;]'' There's poetry in trees. Then one day a poet found it. Then a music master wove around it a melody. An artist touched it, gave it form in colors rich and warm. Now we bring to you these three, poem, picture, melody. A simple tribute to a tree. 
* ''[introduction to &quot;Blame It On the Samba&quot;]'' The intoxicating rhythm of the samba. A talented miss serves a musical cocktail with a true Latin American fling. So if three boisterous birds of a feather fall under the influence of this torrid tropical tempo, don't blame them, blame it on the rhythm of the samba.
* ''[introduction to &quot;Pecos Bill&quot;]'' Here's a tall tale straight from the chuck wagon, just the way the old-timers used to tell it. According to them, Pecos Bill was the roughest, toughest, rootin'est, tootin'est, shootin'est cowpoke that ever lived. Well, any story about old Pecos is bound to be right strong medicine, so maybe it's best to sashay into it kinda gentle-like.

==The Legend of Johnny Appleseed==
:'''Johnny Appleseed''':''[staring at his dead body]'' Who's that, sleepin' in the evening dusk?
:'''Johnny's Angel''': Why, that's just your husk, John. Your mortal husk.
:'''Johnny Appleseed''': ''[shocked]'' My ''husk''?! You mean to say I'm...I'm passed away?

==Pecos Bill==
:''[A coyote howls in the distance]''
:'''Luana Patten''': Uncle Roy?
:'''Roy Rogers''': Yes, hon?
:'''Luana Patten''': What makes wolves howl like that?
:'''Bobby Driscoll''': Wolves, huh? Those are ''coyotes'', aren't they Roy?
:'''Roy Rogers''': Yup. They're coyotes. Bobby's right. They always howl when the moon is bright.
:'''Luana Patten''': Why?
:'''Roy Rogers''': Well, that's just a little story.
:'''Bobby Driscoll''': Cowboys in it?
:'''Roy Rogers''': Yes siree.
:'''Bobby Driscoll''': Indians too?

==Cast==
* [[w:Roy Rogers|Roy Rogers]] as Himself / Narrator / Singer. (''Pecos Bill'')
* [[w:Trigger (horse)|Trigger]], the smartest horse in the movies as Himself.
* [[w:Dennis Day|Dennis Day]] as Narrator / Singer / Characters. (''Johnny Appleseed'')
* [[w:The Andrews Sisters|The Andrews Sisters]] as Singers. (''Little Toot'')
* [[w:Fred Waring|Fred Waring and the Pennsylvanians]] as Singers. (''Trees'')
* [[w:Freddy Martin|Freddy Martin]] as Music composer. (''Bumble Boogie'')
* [[w:Ethel Smith (organist)|Ethel Smith]] as Organist. (''Blame It On the Samba'')
* [[w:Buddy Clark|Buddy Clark]] as Singer / Narrator.
* [[w:Bob Nolan|Bob Nolan]] as Himself / Singer / Narrator. (''Pecos Bill'')
* [[w:Sons of the Pioneers|Sons of the Pioneers]] as Themselves / Singers / Narrators. (''Pecos Bill'')
* [[w:The Dinning Sisters|The Dinning Sisters]] as Singers. (''Blame It On the Samba'')
* [[w:Bobby Driscoll|Bobby Driscoll]] as Himself. (''Pecos Bill'')
* [[w:Luana Patten|Luana Patten]] as Herself. (''Pecos Bill'')

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:1948 films]]
[[Category:1940s American animated films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:Package films]]
[[Category:American films with live action and animation]]
[[Category:Donald Duck films]]
[[Category:Censored films]]</text>
      <sha1>ejcy4mdxb0gfdhumw4qq5flbvcujr3b</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Philip Spratt</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>215613</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964915</id>
      <parentid>3930161</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:51:27Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Staryu</username>
        <id>3148445</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>Grammar</comment>
      <origin>3964915</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2273" sha1="5ra8s1u4xso3voh3uulkt5n4udz7d51" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Philip Spratt.jpg|thumb|Philip Spratt]]

'''[[w:Philip Spratt|Philip Spratt]]''' (26 September 1902 – 8 March 1971) was a British writer and intellectual. Initially a communist sent by the British arm of the Communist International (Comintern), based in Moscow, to spread Communism in India, he subsequently became a friend and colleague of M.N. Roy, founder of the Communist parties in Mexico and India, and along with him became a communist activist.

==Quotes==

*&quot;My recollection is that though the communist group put up a worker, or rather a railway clerk, against him, we were not displeased at his election. We did not regard him as one of us, but we recognised him as one who could be useful. The term was not yet current, or we should have called him a fellow-traveller.&quot;
** Philip Spratt, who was leader of the CPI at that time, writing about [[Jawaharlal Nehru]]
** Philip Spratt, ''Blowing Up India'' (London: Phoenix House, 1957 p. 109), quoted in [[Sita Ram Goel]], ''Genesis and Growth of Nehruism. Vol. 1, Commitment to Communism'' (New Delhi: Voice of India 1993)

*&quot;For nearly twenty of his years in London, he was known as a close supporter of the communists. People change their minds, but Mr. Menon's recent speeches do not suggest that he has changed his. I should guess that be is one of that considerable band of people in important positions in the free world who, though not technically party members, are in fact disciplined communists. Even if this is disputed, it will be agreed that there is something anomalous in a convinced partisan of the aggressor masquerading as a neutral mediator, and contriving so regularly to serve the aggressor's purposes. I hope people will not think I am suffering from a conspiracy mania; after all, Communism is a conspiracy.&quot;
**Philip Spratt about [[V. K. Krishna Menon]]
**Quoted in  [[Sita Ram Goel]], ''Genesis and Growth of Nehruism. Vol. 1, Commitment to Communism'' (New Delhi: Voice of India 1993)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Spratt, Philip}}
[[Category:Communists]]
[[Category:Atheists from England]]
[[Category:Editors from India]]
[[Category:Prisoners]]
[[Category:1902 births]]
[[Category:1971 deaths]]
[[Category:People from London]]
[[Category:Atheists from India]]</text>
      <sha1>5ra8s1u4xso3voh3uulkt5n4udz7d51</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Thomas &amp; Friends: Misty Island Rescue</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>215883</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965134</id>
      <parentid>3954177</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:10:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965134</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3683" sha1="ttxal40clz6t4kyiv3gtink8b7aysej" xml:space="preserve">{{italic_title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Thomas and Friends/Season 1|1]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 2|2]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 3|3]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 4|4]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 5|5]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 6|6]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 7|7]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 8|8]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 9|9]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 10|10]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 11|11]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 12|12]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 13|13]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 14|14]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 15|15]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 16|16]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 17|17]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 18|18]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 19|19]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 20|20]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 21|21]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 22|22]] [[Thomas and Friends/Season 23|23]] | '''Movies''': [[Thomas and the Magic Railroad]] / [[Calling All Engines!]] / [[The Great Discovery]] / [[Hero of the Rails]] / '''Misty Island Rescue''' / [[Thomas &amp; Friends: Day of the Diesels|Day of the Diesels]] / [[Blue Mountain Mystery]] / [[Thomas &amp; Friends: King of the Railway|King of the Railway]] / [[Tale of the Brave]] / [[The Adventure Begins]] / [[Thomas &amp; Friends: Sodor's Legend of the Lost Treasure|Sodor's Legend of the Lost Treasure]] / [[The Great Race (Thomas)|The Great Race]] / [[Journey Beyond Sodor]] / [[Big World! Big Adventures!]] | [[Thomas and Friends|Main]]
----
'''''Thomas &amp; Friends: Misty Island Rescue''''' is a 2010 movie special of ''[[Thomas and Friends|Thomas (the Tank Engine) &amp; Friends]]''. This special takes place between [[Thomas and Friends/Season 13|Season 13]] and [[Thomas and Friends/Season 14|14]].
{{film-stub}}

==Steam Team==

===Thomas===
* ''This'' is Misty Island?
* ''[scared]'' Fizzling fireboxes, ??? ''[shouting]'' &lt;span style=&quot;color:green&quot;&gt;'''HEEEEELP!!!'''&lt;/span style=&quot;color:green&quot;&gt;

===Percy===
* Cranky, Salty! Look! That must be Misty Island!

==Diesel==
* So long, Thomas.

==Logging Locos==

===Bash===
* I'm Bash.

===Dash===
* I'm Dash.

===Ferdinand===
* And I'm... Ferdinand.

==Diesel 10==
* You'll be laughing on the other side of your boilers soon, silly steamies. ''[laughs evilly; then exhales]'' Yes.

==Cast==
* {{w|Matt Wilkinson}} as Diesel 10
** {{w|Rupert Degas}} (originally)

* {{w|Keith Wickham}} as Salty and Captain

* {{w|Togo Igawa}} as Hiro

===US dub===
* [[w:Martin Sherman (actor)|Martin Sherman]] as Thomas &amp; Percy (Best Friends)
* {{w|Kerry Shale}} as Dash, Harold, Gordon, James, Henry, Kevin, &amp; Sir Topham Hatt
* [[w:William Hope (actor)|William Hope]] as Bash, Whiff, Edward, Toby, Rocky and the Dock Manager
* {{w|Glenn Wrage}} as Ferdinand and Cranky
* {{w|Jules de Jongh}} as Emily
* {{w|David Bedella}} as Victor
* {{w|Michael Brandon}} as Diesel and the Narrator

===UK dub===
* Narrated by {{w|Michael Angelis}}

* {{w|Ben Small}} as Thomas, Ferdinand and Toby
* Keith Wickham as Dash, Harold, Whiff, Percy, Henry, Gordon, James, Henry and the Fat Controller
* {{w|Teresa Gallagher}} as Emily
* Matt Wilkinson as Bash, Victor, Rocky, Cranky, Kevin and the Dock Manager
* Kerry Shale as Diesel

==External links==
{{Wikipedia|Misty Island Rescue}}

{{Thomas &amp; Friends}}

[[Category:2010 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:British computer-animated films]]
[[Category:Children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:Films based on television series]]
[[Category:Thomas &amp; Friends films‎]]
[[Category:Films directed by Greg Tiernan]]
[[Category:Films based on children's books]]
[[Category:Films based on animated television series]]</text>
      <sha1>ttxal40clz6t4kyiv3gtink8b7aysej</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Lion King (2019 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>217624</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965268</id>
      <parentid>3958358</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:09:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965268</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="34121" sha1="8j4d2k10za3kjbc9rec6a39eiktjohc" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:The Lion King (2019 film)|The Lion King]]''''' is a [[w:2019 in film|2019]] photorealistically animated  [[w:Musical film|musical]] [[w:Drama (film and television)|drama film]] based on and a remake to Disney's ''[[The Lion King|The Lion King]]'' ([[w:1994 in film|1994]]). Produced by [[w:Walt Disney Pictures|Disney]] and distributed by [[w:Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures|Walt Disney Studios Motion Studios]]. This film is about a young [[w:masai lion|masai lion]] named [[w:Simba|Simba]], who must embrace his role as the rightful king of his native land following the murder of his father, [[w:Mufasa|Mufasa]], at the hands of his uncle, [[w:Scar (The Lion King)|Scar]]. The midquel, ''[[Mufasa: The Lion King|Mufasa: The Lion King]]'' will be released on December 20, [[w:2024 in film|2024]] (which was the same release date of [[Sonic the Hedgehog 3|Sonic the Hedgehog 3]].

The movie stars [[w:Donald Glover|Donald McKinley Glover Jr.]], [[Beyoncé|Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter]], [[w:Billy Eichner|Billy Eichner]], [[w:Seth Rogen|Seth Aaron Rogen]], [[James Earl Jones]], [[w:Chiwetel Ejiofor|Chiwetel Umeadi Ejiofor]], [[w:John Kani|Bonisile John Kani]], [[John Oliver|John William Oliver]], [[w:JD McCrary|JayDon McCrary]], [[w:Shahadi Wright Joseph|Shahadi Wright Joseph]], [[w:Florence Kasumba|Florence Kasumba]], [[w:Keegan-Michael Key|Keegan-Michael Key]], [[w:Eric André|Eric Samuel André]], [[Alfre Woodard]], [[w:Penny Johnson Jerald|Penny Johnson Jerald]], [[w:Amy Sedaris|Amy Louise Sedaris]], [[w:Chance the Rapper|Chancelor Jonathan Bennett]], Josh McCrary , with [[w:Phil LaMarr|Philip LaMarr]], and [[w:J. Lee|J Lee]].

:''Directed by [[w:Jon Favreau|Jon Favreau]]. Written by [[w:Jeff Nathanson|Jeff Nathanson]], inspired by [[The Lion King|Disney's 1994 animated feature film of the same name]].''

== [[w:Simba|Simba]] ==
'''Cub'''
* But, [[w:Mufasa|Dad]], don't we eat the antelope?
'''Adult'''
* My father once told me, &quot;Protect everything the light touches.&quot; If I do not fight for it, who will?
* Give me one good reason why I shouldn't rip you apart.
* Run. Run away, [[w:Scar|Scar]]. Run away, and ''never'' return.
* You can't win, Scar!

== Scar ==
* ''[to the mouse]'' Life is not fair, is it, my little friend? While some are born to feast... others spend their lives in the dark, begging for scraps. The way I see it, you and I are exactly the same. We both want to find a way out.
* ''[violently digs his claws into Mufasa is paws]'' Long live '''''THE KING!''''' ''[violently slaps Mufasa off the cliff]''
* Run. Run away, Simba. Run away, and ''never'' return!
* Mufasa and Simba are gone. Which means I am your king.
* This is my kingdom! MY DESTINY!

== Nala ==
'''Cub'''
* I thought you were very brave.
'''Adult'''
* I have been waiting too, and I am ''not'' a cub anymore!

== Mufasa ==
* While others search for what they can take, a true king searches for what he can give.

== Dialogue ==
:''[After &quot;The Circle of Life&quot; has ended, a [[w:Typical striped grass mouse|mouse]] appears onscreen, looking for food. The mouse sniffs and looks the lion’s body is revealed to be Scar's.]''
:'''Scar''': ''[first lines; to the mouse]'' Life is not fair, is it, my little friend? While some are born to feast... others spend their lives in the dark, begging for scraps. The way I see it, you and I are exactly the same. We both want to find a way out.
:'''Zazu''': ''[out of nowhere]'' The king approaches! This is not a drill. His Majesty has requested an audience. Upon his entrance, you will rise and genuflect.
:'''Scar''': ''[sees the mouse escaped]'' Zazu... ''[to Zazu; angrily]'' you’ve made me lose my lunch.
:'''Zazu''': You will answer to Mufasa for missing the ceremony this morning.
:'''Scar''': ''[to Zazu]'' I answer to no one.
:'''Zazu''': Scar? Scar. Scar, Scar, Scar, Scar, Scar. No, no Don’t look at me like that.
:'''Scar''': ''[to Zazu; sarcastically]'' Are you hungry, Zazu? Perhaps we could have a bite together! ''[Scar catches him in his paw]''
:'''Zazu''': You can’t eat me! It is forbidden to eat a member of the king’s court! Ow! No, please! Stop it!
:'''Mufasa''': ''[first words; enters]'' Scar.
:'''Scar''': ''[to Mufasa]'' Well, look who’s come down to mingle with the commoners.
:'''Mufasa''': Sarabi and I didn't see you at the presentation of Simba.
:'''Scar''': ''[faking astonishment]'' Was that ''today?'' ''[slips on the rock]'' Must’ve slipped my mind. Of course I meant no disrespect towards His Majesty or Sarabi. ''[licks his paw]'' As you know, I have tremendous respect for the queen.
:'''Zazu''': ''[to Scar]'' As the king's brother, you should’ve been first in line.
:'''Scar''': ''[to Zazu]'' I was first in line. Or don’t you remember? That is, until the precious prince arrived. 
:'''Mufasa''': ''[angrily]'' Don't turn your back on ''me,'' Scar.
:'''Scar''': ''[looking back]'' Oh, no, Mufasa. Perhaps ''you'' shouldn't turn ''your'' back on ''me.''
:'''Mufasa''':	''[growls ferociously and jumps in front of Scar, angrily baring his teeth]'' '''''Is that a challenge?''''' ''[growls]''
:'''Scar''': I wouldn't ''dream'' of challenging ''you'' again.
:'''Zazu''': ''[flies back to Scar]'' A wise decision. You are no match for His Royalness.
:'''Scar''': ''[looks at Zazu]'' Well, as far as brains go, ''I'' got the lion's share, but when it comes to brute strength. I’m afraid my big brother... will always rule.
:'''Mufasa''': Not always, Scar. One day, it’ll be my son who rules. Simba will be your king.
:'''Scar''': ''[looks back at Mufasa]'' Then long live the king. ''[exits]''
:'''Mufasa''': ''[about Scar]'' What am I going to do with him?
:'''Zazu''': Come on. We both know he should've been expelled from the Pride Lands long ago.
:'''Mufasa''': He is my brother, Zazu. This is his home. As long as I am king, that'll never change.
:'''Zazu''': Well, there is one in every family, sire. I had a cousin who thought he was the woodpecker. He slammed his head into trees and our beaks aren't built for it, he was concussed regularly. ''[notices nothing]'' Oh, you've gone. Uh, sire, coming back!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:'''Mufasa''': Everything you see exists together in the delicate balance. As king, you need to understand that balance and respect all the creatures; from the crawling ant to the leaping antelope.
:'''Simba''': But, Dad, don't we eat the antelope?
:'''Mufasa''': Yes, Simba, but let me explain. When we die, our bodies become the grass. And the antelope eat the grass. And so, we are all connected in the great Circle of Life.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[after Simba fell into Scar's side of the den, while trying to hunt a beetle]''
:'''Scar''': If you wish to kill something, you might want to stay downwind.
:'''Simba''': I know how to hunt, Uncle Scar.
:'''Scar''': Then let's hope we're never attacked by a beetle. Go back to your den, Simba. I don't babysit.
:'''Simba''': Babysit? I'm gonna king of Pride Rock. My dad showed me the whole kingdom. Said I'm gonna rule it all.
:'''Scar''': Is that so?
:'''Simba''': Think about it. When I'm king, I'll have to give you orders. Tell you what to do. How weird is that?
:'''Scar''': You've no idea.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;
:'''Kamari''':	Did ya hear that? The future king! ''[laughs]''
:''[Simba stares around helplessly.]''
:'''Azizi''': Oh, don't hurt me! Oh, do it again! ''[laughs]''
:''[Simba lunges forward and roars again, seemingly with a full-grown lion's roar.]''
: '''Mufasa''':	''[from offscreen]'' *roars*
:''[The hyenas recoil.]''
: '''Hyenas''':	''[whimper]''
: '''Mufasa''':	[from offscreen] *roars* [Shenzi, Simba, and the hyenas stare in awe. The crowd of hyenas clears to reveal Mufasa tossing them aside like a ragdolls.] *roars*
:''[The hyenas converge on Mufasa.]''

:'''Hyenas''': *yip*
:'''[Mufasa bats the hyenas away.]'''
:'''Mufasa''': *roars* [Mufasa stands protectively in front of Simba and Nala.] *roars* [The hyenas recoil. Shenzi stares down in dismay.] *roars*
:'''Hyenas''': *whimper*
:'''Mufasa''': *roars* 
:''[after Mufasa attacked the hyenas to save Simba, Nala and Zazu]''
:'''Mufasa''': If you ''ever'' come near my son again...
:'''Shenzi''': No, Mufasa. Never. Never again.
:'''Mufasa''': You've been warned, Shenzi.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[As the sun is setting, while they head back to Pride Rock.]''
:'''Mufasa''': Zazu? Take Nala back to Pride Rock.
:'''Zazu''': Yes, sire. ''[short pause]'' Don't be too hard on him, sire. I remember a cub, a certain headstrong cub... who was always getting into scrapes. And he achieved some prominence, did he not, sire?
:'''Mufasa''': I have to teach my son a lesson.
:'''Zazu''': Come along, Nala. ''[he and Nala leaves]''
:'''Mufasa''': Simba? ''[Simba in disgrace walking to Mufasa slowly, but finds his father's paw track and then sits next to him]'' You deliberately disobeyed me.
:'''Simba''': I know.
:'''Mufasa''': You could have been killed. And what's worse, you put Nala in danger. Do you understand what's at stake? You jeopardized the future of our pride.
:'''Simba''': I just wanted to show you I could do it. That I could be brave like you.
:'''Mufasa''': I'm only brave when I have to be, when there's no other choice.
:'''Simba''': But you're not scared of anything.
:'''Mufasa''': I was today.
:'''Simba''': You were?
:'''Mufasa''': Yes. I thought I might lose you.
:'''Simba''': I guess even kings get scared, huh?
:'''Mufasa''': More than you could ever know.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[Nearing the end of stampede; Mufasa is near the cliff, when Scar suddenly shows up]''
:'''Mufasa''': Scar! Help me!
:''[The stones falls down as Mufasa clings his life, Scar angrily sinks his claws in Mufasa's forepaws, causing him to roar in pain.]''
:'''Scar''': Long... live... '''''THE KING!''' [punches Mufasa off the cliff]''
:''[Mufasa falls off the cliff to his death while screaming]''
:''[Cut to Simba standing on a high ledge overlooking the stampede.]''
:'''Simba''': ''[prolonged] '''NO!!!!!'''''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[After Mufasa is killed by Scar near the ending of stampede]''
:'''Scar''': Simba! What have you done?
:'''Simba''': ''[while crying]'' It was a stampede. He tried to save me. It was an accident. I didn't mean for it to...
:'''Scar''': Of course you didn't. No one ever means for these things to happen. But the king is dead... and if it weren't for you... he'd still be alive. Your father had such hopes for you... gave you so many chances. And this is how you repay him.
:'''Simba''': ''[still crying]'' I didn't know. I didn't know.
:'''Scar''': Oh, what will your mother think? A son who causes his father's death. A boy who kills a king.
:'''Simba''': What am I gonna do something?
:''[Scar leans in close]''
:'''Scar''': Run... Run away, Simba. Run away and never return!
:''[In fear, Simba runs away in tears, leaving the gorge. The hyenas emerges behind Scar.]''
:'''Scar''': Kill him.
:''[The hyenas runs off to chase Simba away from Pride Lands]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[After the hyenas let Simba get away]''
:'''Shenzi''': Go down, and make sure he's dead. ''[leaves]''
:''[Kamari and Azizi look down the cliff, but he is close]''
:'''Kamari''': Seriously?
:'''Azizi''': Oh, I'm sorry. ''[backs away from Kamari]''
:'''Kamari''': That's a good distance right there.
:'''Azizi''': Okay.
:'''Kamari''': No little cub could survive that fall. Listen, we're gonna tell her... we went down there and we ate him.
:'''Azizi''': Uh-huh. That's perfect, 'cause I am starving!
:'''Kamari''': We're not gonna eat him. Simba is dead. That's all she ever has to know. (Plus, if he did survive and comes back, then we can murder him.) ''[leaves]''
:'''Azizi''': Works for me. (Hey, Simba! If you are alive out there and do come back, you're dead!) ''[leaves with them]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[As the buzzards are about to devour the laid Simba, one sees Pumbaa running and screaming into the scene to scare them off.]''
:'''Pumbaa''': I missed 'em! I'm gonna get one of those vultures one day. I'm gonna get one!
:'''Timon''': I don't know why it's so important to you.
:'''Pumbaa''': I just feel like it would make me feel better. ''[spots Simba]'' Oh, no. It's a little lion!
:'''Timon''': That is not a lion.
:'''Pumbaa''': Well then, go check it out. What is it?
:'''Timon''': That is not a lion, it's a furry bird!
:'''Pumbaa''': It looks like a lion!
:'''Timon''': That's not a lion. Let me get a closer look. Excuse me. All right, let me see what we're dealing with here. ''[ Timon looks and draws at Simba's lips exposing the cub's teeth, alarmed. He leaps up in fright.] '''IT'S A LION! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, PUMBAA!'''''
:'''Pumbaa''': Wait! Hey, Timon. Wait, Timon, wait! It's a little lion!
:'''Timon''': ''[hides behind the rock]'' It gets bigger.
:'''Pumbaa''': Can we keep him? Can we please keep him? Oh, oh, okay. I promise I'll walk him every day! If he makes a little mess, I'll clean it up.
:'''Timon''': You'll be his little mess! He's gonna eat you and then use my body as a toothpick!
:'''Pumbaa''': But one day, when he's big and strong, he'll be on our side!
:'''Timon''': I've got it. What if he's on our side? Hear me out! Having a ferocious lion around might not be such a bad idea!
:'''Pumbaa''': Well then, can we keep him?
:'''Timon''': Yes, of course we can keep him! My God, who is the brains of this operation?
:'''Pumbaa''': We're gonna name him Fred!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;
:'''Timon''': Everyone, this is Simba.
:''[Some guineafowl stare at Simba as he passes.]''
:'''Guineafowl''':	That, my friend, is a lion.
:''[A bushbaby emerges from behind a log.]''
:'''Bushbaby'''':	What about food? Have you thought about feeding that thing?
:''[Simba skips along next to Timon and Pumbaa.]''
:'''Simba''':	Yeah, I'm starved. I could eat a whole zebra.
:'''Antelope''': *gasps*
:'''Bat-Eared fox''': Here we go.
:'''Timon''': Uh, no, no, no, kid, we're fresh out of zebra.
:'''Simba''':	Any antelope?
:''[A trio of antelope stare at Simba worriedly.]''
:'''Antelope''':	Uh-oh.
:'''Timon''':	No. Listen, kid, if you want to live with us, you have to eat like us.
:''[An elephant shrew emerges from some grass. He runs alongside Simba.]''
:'''Elephant shrew''':	And most importantly, ''[The elephant shrew pauses, yelling after Simba.]'' not eat us.
:''[Simba, Timon, and Pumbaa approach a log.]''
:'''Timon''':	This looks like a good spot to rustle up some grub.
:''[The other animals follow Simba, Timon, and Pumbaa. Pumbaa breaks the log open,'''CRASH!!!''' revealing grubs inside.]''
:'''Elephant shrew''': Yeah!
:'''Bat-Eared fox''': Perfect!
:'''Bushbaby''': Step aside, fellas.
:''[The animals crowd around the log and begin to feast on the grubs.]''
:'''Simba''':	Ugh. What's that?
:'''Guineafowl''':	Ooh. Too chewey.
:''[The elephant shrew holds up a grub.]''
:'''Elephant shrew''':	This one's got some nuttiness.
:'''Timon''':	Mmm. Now, that's what I call umami.
:''[Pumbaa slurps up a grub.]''
:'''Pumbaa''':	Slimy, yet satisfying.
:'''Timon''':	Mmm. Extra crunchy.
:'''Pumbaa''':	They're local.
:'''Timon''':	Yeah. Oh, are they?
:'''Pumbaa''':	They're from ''[Pumbaa points with his head.]'' right there.
:''[Timon turns to face Simba.]''
:'''Timon''':	I'm telling ya, kid, this is the great life. ''[Timon turns back to the grubs.]'' No rules. No responsibilities. Ooh. ''[Timon grabs a caterpillar and massages it with his paws.]'' The little cream-filled kind. I love these.
:'''Pumbaa''':	Those are good.
:'''Timon''':	I love these.
:'''Pumbaa''':	Those are the best.
:'''Bushbaby''':	Can I have the head?
:''[Timon turns to face Simba.]''
:'''Timon''':	Well, kid?
:''[Simba slinks toward the insects and grubs cautiously.]''
:'''Simba''': Oh, well.  Hakuna Matata. ''[Simba eats the caterpillar.]'' Slimy, ''[Simba licks his lips.]'' yet...satisfying!
:'''Timon''':	That's it!
:'''Pumbaa''': We didn't lie.
:'''Animals''':	*chuckle*
:''[Simba begins to feast alongside the other wild animals.]''
:'''Guinea fowl''':	Egg sac! I got an egg sac!
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;


:'''Simba''': What's up with that guy?
:'''Timon''': Um, Simba... How can I say this? He's prey.
:'''Pumbaa''': Yeah.
:'''Timon''': And he is never gonna want to frolic with a carnivore.
:'''Pumbaa''': No. You two will never frolic.
:'''Simba''': Why not?
:'''Timon''': ''[sighs]'' You see, in nature, there's a delicate balance.
:'''Simba''': Oh, yeah. The Circle of Life. I know that.
:'''Pumbaa''': Whoa!
:'''Timon''': No, no, no, no. I don't know where you're getting &quot;circle&quot; from.
:'''Pumbaa''': No, yeah. There's no Circle of Life.
:'''Timon''': No, it's no circle.
:'''Pumbaa''': No, not at all.
:'''Timon:''' In fact, it's the opposite.
:'''Pumbaa''': Yeah.
:'''Timon''': It's a line.
:'''Pumbaa''': Yeah.
:'''Timon''': It's a meaningless life of indifference.
:'''Pumbaa''': And we are all just running towards the end of the line. And then, one day, we will reach the end, and that will be it.
:'''Timon''': That's it.
:'''Pumbaa''': Line over.
:'''Timon''': Nothing.
:'''Pumbaa''': Nada. And you can really just kinda do your own thing...
:'''Elephant shrew''': ''[Simba paws at the termite mound; termites fly free]'' Woo-hoo!
:'''Pumbaa''': ...and fend for yourself 'cause your line doesn't affect anyone else's lines.
:'''Timon''': You're alive, and then, you're not. Like this guy. ''[eats a termite]'' Mmm.
:'''Simba''': You sure it's not circle? That we're all connected?
:'''Pumbaa''': A circle would mean we're all this. That would mean what I do affects him, affects that thing...
:'''Timon''': Yeah. No.
:'''Pumbaa''': ...affects that thing...
:'''Timon''': That's not how it goes.
:'''Pumbaa''': ...which would make doing whatever we wanted not that cool.
:'''Timon''': Let me simplify this for you. Life is meaningless.
:'''Pumbaa''': Yes. That's why you just gotta look out for yourself. That's why you do you, Simba.
:'''Timon''': Yeah, Simba, for the first time, we're entrusting you to make a plan for us today.
:'''Pumbaa''': This is so important. Just think about all you have been taught.
:'''Timon''': What do you wanna do?
:'''Simba''': Absolutely... ''[brings his weight down on the termite mound]'' nothing. ''[the termite mound breaks in half, spilling termites everywhere]''
:'''Pumbaa''': Exactly!
:'''Timon''': Woo-hoo!
:'''Pumbaa''': He gets it.
:''[The jungle animals feast on the termites]''
:'''Guinea fowl''': ''[screams happily]'' Jackpot!
:'''Bush baby''': Out of my way. Out of my way.
:'''Elephant shrew''': Crunchy!
:'''Bat-eared fox''': All right. It’s time to eat.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[Rafiki, elated by the sight of Simba, follows him]''
:'''Simba''': Go away.
:'''Rafiki''': Going away will not answer the question.
:'''Simba''': What question? Who are you?
:'''Rafiki''': I know exactly who I am. The question is, who are you?
:'''Simba''': I'm nobody. So leave me alone, all right?
:'''Rafiki''': Everybody is somebody. Even a ''nobody''.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[Simba sees his father's spirit in the clouds]''
:'''Mufasa''': Simba, you must take your place in the Circle of Life.
:'''Simba''': I can't.
:'''Mufasa''': You must remember who you are. The one true king.
:'''Simba''': I'm sorry. I don't know how to be like you.
:'''Mufasa''': As king, I was most proud of one thing. Having you as my son.
:'''Simba''': That was a long time ago.
:'''Mufasa''': No, Simba. That is forever.
:'''Simba''': Please, don't leave me again.
:'''Mufasa''': I never left you, I never will. Remember who you are. Remember.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;

:''[Simba, Pumbaa, Timon, Zazu, and Nala make it to the Pride Lands]''
:'''Timon''': ''[about the hyenas]'' What's your plan for getting us past the slobbering guards?
:'''Simba''': Live bait. ''[he, Nala, Zazu, and Timon look at Pumbaa]''
:'''Pumbaa''': That is a great idea. Those guys could never resist some fresh meat. So, all we need to do is to find something that is like big and plump and juicy. Maybe like a gnu?
:''[They all continue to stare blankly at Pumbaa]''
:'''Pumbaa''': Why is everyone looking at me?
:''[Shenzi's clan of hyenas are paying attention to Timon. Pumbaa is set up like a roast pig]''
:'''Timon''': [[w:Be Our Guest|Bonjour, mademoiselle. It is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we proudly present your dinner. Be our...]] '''''GAH!'''' ''[screams]''
:''[Timon and Pumbaa flee before the clan of hyenas]''
:'''Timon''': It's working, Pumbaa.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;
:'''Nala''':	Well, we don't. Your reign is over, Scar. Simba is the rightful king. If you want to get him, [Nala bounds onto a tall rock.] you have to get through us. [Nala halfway turns over one shoulder.] Are you with me, lions?
:'''Lionesses''':	*roar*
:'''Simba''':	The choice is yours, Scar. Step down or fight.
:'''Scar''':	Must this all end in violence? I'd hate to be responsible for the death of a family member, [Scar paces in front of Simba.] to feel the shame of knowing I took the life of someone I love.
:'''Simba''':	I put all that behind me.
:'''Scar''':	But have they put it behind them? Do your faithful subjects know what you've done?
:'''Nala''':	[to Simba] What is he talking about?
:'''Scar''':	So, you haven't told them your little secret? [Scar sits.] Well, Simba, now's your chance to confess. Tell them who's responsible for Mufasa's death.
:''[The lionesses look expectantly at Simba.]''
:'''Simba''':	It was me.
:''[Simba turns his back on Sarabi.]''
:'''Sarabi''':	[worried] It's not true. Tell me it's not true.
:'''Simba''':	It's true. I'm sorry.
:''[Scar stands.]''
:'''Scar''':	He admits it. Murderer!
''[Scar stalks toward Simba.]''
:'''Simba''': [shocked]	No, no. [stammering] It was an accident.
:'''Scar''': If it weren't for you, the king would be alive. It's your fault he's dead. Do you deny it?
:''[Scar circles around Simba, and he stumbles toward the promontory.]''
:'''Simba''':	[stammering in fear] I'm not a murderer.
:''[Scar backs Simba toward the promontory.]''
:'''Scar''': We should believe a son who takes the life of a father? We should believe a son who takes the life of a king? A son who abandons his mother?
:'''Simba''':	No. I'm... I'm...
:'''Scar''': You're what? Say it! Are you the king?
:'''Simba''':	No. No, I'm...
:'''Scar''':	Are you the king?
''[Simba backs to the end of the promontory and nearly slips off.]''
:'''Simba''':	No, I'm...
:''Scar''':	You're what?
:'''Simba''':	I'm...
:'''Scar'':	Say it!
:'''Simba''':	I'm nothing.
:'''Scar''': ''[angrily]'' Then bow to your king!!!
[Simba slips over the edge of the promontory, barely catching on with his claws.]
:'''Simba''':	*roars*
''[Nala runs forward.]''
:'''Nala''': ''[horrified]''	Simba!
:''[Lightning strikes, igniting a tree below Pride Rock. Sarabi paces forward, watching in distress. The fire begins to spread. The camera pans up to show Simba clinging to Pride Rock for dear life.]''
:''[A fire forms below as Simba is hanging to the edge for dear life, Scar comes closer]''
:'''Scar''': This looks familiar. Where have I seen this before? Ah, yes, I remember. This is how Mufasa looked before he died. I looked down, and saw the fear in his eyes. ''[furiously sinks his claws into Simba's paws, the same way he did to Mufasa. Simba roars in pain]'' And here's my little secret: ''[ lens in close to whisper in Simba's ear]'' I killed Mufasa. ''[Simba's eyes widen. In a flashback, Mufasa falls into the gorge, with young Simba watching in terror]''
:'''Young Simba''': ''[echoing]'' No!
''[Furious at his uncle's deception, Simba bites Scar's mane then gets back up on Pride Rock]''
:'''Simba''': My father, your own brother! How could you?!
:'''Scar''': First he kills Mufasa, and now he wants to kill me!
:'''Simba''': '''You''' killed him! Tell them the truth!
:'''Scar''': Don't believe his lies!
:'''Sarabi''': Scar, you told us you didn't get to the gorge in time.
:'''Scar''': That's true!
:'''Sarabi''': ''[angrily]'' Then how did you see the look in Mufasa's eyes?!
''[Scar realizes he exposed himself]''
:'''Simba''': Murderer!!!
:'''Scar''': ''[ to the hyenas]'' KILL THEM ALL!
'''Hyenas'''	*cackle*
:''[In answer, The hyenas charge at Simba.]''
''Simba''':	*growls*
:''[The hyenas swarm Simba, who fights back. Simba grabs a hyena and tosses it aside.]''
'''Hyena''':	*whimpers*
:'''Nala''':	Lions, attack!
:'''[Nala charges into battle. The other lionesses follow suit.]''
:'''Lionesses''':	*growl*
:''[The hyenas charge at the lionesses.]''
'''Hyenas'''	*cackle*
''[The hyenas and lionesses fight. Meanwhile, Simba continues to fight off hyenas on the promontory. Shenzi charges at Simba.]''
:'''Shenzi''':	*yells*
:''[Shenzi bowls into Simba, and the hyenas manage to knock him onto his side. Nala looks up in concern as Simba is swarmed by hyenas.]''
'''Nala''':	Simba!'' [Nala knocks several hyenas off Simba.]'' *grunts*
:''[Nala fights off the hyenas. Cut to Timon and Pumbaa running into a cave.]''
:'''Timon and Pumbaa'''':	*pant*
:''[Timon and Pumbaa pause and look outside the cave.]''
:'''Timon''':	Pumbaa, I think we lost them.
:'''Pumbaa''':	That was terrifying.
:''[Behind Timon and Pumbaa, eyes gleam from the shadows.]''
:'''Hyenas''':	*growl*
:''[Four hyenas stalk into the light.]''
:'''Pumbaa''':	Do you hear a low growl?
:'''Hyena''':	Looks like we'll be having pig for dinner. [Timon turns around.] Plump and chubby.
:'''Pumbaa''':	Chubby? [Pumbaa turns around.] Did he just call me chubby?
:'''Timon''':	Uh-oh.
''[Timon hops off Pumbaa's back and retreats to the sidelines.]''
:'''Pumbaa''':	It sounded... It sounded a lot like he just said &quot;chubby,&quot; which would be a mistake because [The hyenas surround Pumbaa.] I will not be made to feel ashamed of who I am!
:''[Timon watches in concern.]''
:'''Timon''':	Oh, boy.
:'''Pumbaa''':	I may run from hyenas, but I will always fight a bully!
:''[Pumbaa charges at a hyena and headbutts it aside.]''
:'''Hyena''':	*whimpers*
:''[Pumbaa charges and headbutts another hyena.]''
:'''Pumbaa''':	*grunts*
:'''Hyena''':	*whimpers*
:''[The remaining hyenas flee. Pumbaa headbutts them out of the cave.]''
:'''Hyenas''':	*cackle*
:'''Pumbaa''':	*grunts* ''[Pumbaa pauses, and Timon climbs into his mane.]'' *sighs*
:'''Timon''':	You feel better, Pumbaa?
:'''Pumbaa''':	I do.
:'''Timon''':	You got that out of your system?
:'''Pumbaa''':	I did.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;
:'''Zazu''':	For king and country!
:''[Zazu swoops down and pecks Azizi.]''
:'''Azizi''':	*grunts* ''[Zazu swoops down and pecks Azizi again.]'' *grunts* It's the bird. I got him! ''[Zazu briefly lands on Azizi's back, then takes to the air again.]'' I got him!
:''[Azizi leaps up at Zazu but misses. He runs away, with Zazu chasing after him and pecking at him.]''
:'''Zazu''':	Tally-ho!
:'''Azizi''':	Oh, no. He's got me! He's got me! ''[Azizi runs head-on into a rock.]'' *grunts*
:''[The hyenas chase after Zazu.]''
:'''Kamari''': Get that bird!
:''[The hyenas leap up and snap at Zazu, who dodges their attacks.]''
:'''Zazu''':	*grunts*
:'''Hyenas''':	*growl*
:'''Zazu''':	*whimpers* ''[The hyenas corner Zazu against a wall.]'' Please. Let's discuss this.
:''[The hyenas surround Zazu.]''
:'''Hyenas''':	*growl*
:'''Rafiki'''':	''[from offscreen]'' *shouts in Xhosa* ''[A stick whacks the hyenas away. Suddenly, Rafiki jumps down from the ceiling.]'' *shouts in Xhosa*
:'''[Rafiki begins beating the hyenas with his staff.]''
'''Hyenas'''	*yelp*
:''[The hyenas flee the cave. Rafiki watches them go, then lifts his staff over his head triumphantly.]''
:'''Rafiki''':	*shouts in Xhosa*
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;
:''[Cut to Scar lying at the base of Pride Rock.] *groans* [Scar staggers to his paws and begins to walk away. Suddenly, the hyenas surround him, and he pauses.]'' 
:'''Scar''': My friends. It will take some time, but together, we will build our army!
:''[Kamari stalks toward Scar.]''
:'''Kamari''':	&quot;Friends,&quot; huh? I thought you said we were &quot;revolting scavengers.&quot;
''[Azizi stalks toward Scar.]''
:'''Azizi''':	Yeah. That you wanted to kill us.
:''[Scar backs away as the hyenas advance.]''
:'''Scar''':	[desperately] No, no. Let me explain. I was trying to fool him. We will rule together!
:''[Shenzi emerges through the smoke, stalking toward Scar.]''
:'''Shenzi''':	There's only one true thing you ever said, Scar. [Scar looks at Shenzi.] A hyena's belly...is never full!
:'''Hyenas''':	*cackle*
:'''Scar''':	*growls* [The hyenas begin to attack Scar, who tries to fight them off.] No... [The hyenas overwhelm Scar to death by ripping apart.] '''NO!'''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&gt;
''[Fade to a shot of dark evening clouds. Thunder rumbles. The camera slowly pans to the side to show Pride Rock. The rain begins to extinguish the fires. Simba climbs a rock and overlooks the lionesses. They look up at him expectantly, and he walks over to join them. Timon and Pumbaa approach. Simba strides past the lionesses. He nuzzles Sarabi, then Nala. Zazu lands nearby and bows to Simba.]''
:'''Zazu''':	Your Majesty.
:''[Simba looks up to where Rafiki is standing on Pride Rock. Simba climbs up to meet Rafiki, and Nala climbs up to stand behind them. Rafiki strokes Simba's forehead. After a moment, Simba walks toward the promontory, with the lionesses watching him. He begins his ascent. Upon reaching the edge, he pauses and looks up. Above, the clouds part]''
:'''Mufasa''':	[from offscreen] Remember.
'''Simba''':	*roars*
:'''Lionesses''':	*roar*
:''[Timon climbs into Pumbaa's mane.]''
:'''Simba''':	*roars*
'''Chorus''':	 ♪ Busa le lizwe bo. Busa le lizwe bo. [Fade to a puddle by daylight. A mouse scurries into it and washes itself.] Busa le lizwe bo. Lethu busa ngoxolo. Is'khathi sifikile. ♪ 
:''[The mouse runs off.]''
:'''Lebo M''':	 ♪ Se fi le. ♪ 
:'''Chorus''':	 ♪ Is'khathi busa iyo. ♪ 
:''[The camera pans up to show the Pride Lands restored to their former glory. Pride Landers gather around Pride Rock, upon which Simba stands on Pride Rock's promontory]''
:'''Lebo M''':	 ♪ Baba ti tabo. ♪ 
:'''Chorus''':	 ♪ Is'khathi sifikile. ♪ 
:'''Lebo M''':	 ♪ Maye babo. Busa ilomhlaba. ♪ 
:'''Chorus''':	 ♪ Is'khathi sifikile. ♪ 
:'''Elephants''':	*trumpet*
'''Chorus''':	 ♪ Is'khathi sifikile. ♪ 
:'''Lebo M''':	 ♪ Se fi le. ♪ 
:''[More animals gather around Pride Rock.]''
'''Chorus''':	 ♪ Busa Simba. Busa Simba. ♪ 
:'''Baby ostriches''':	*chitter*
: '''Full Chorus''':	 ♪ Ubuse ngo xolo. Ubuse ngo thando. [The camera pans up to show Simba on Pride Rock.] Ubuse ngo xolo. Ubuse ngo thando. Ubuse ngo xolo. [Nala strides up to join Simba, while Zazu flies toward them.] Ingonyama nengw' enamabala. [Zazu lands on Pride Rock and bows to Simba.] Ingonyama nengw' enamabala. [Simba and Nala nuzzle.] 'Till we find our place [Rafiki strides up Pride Rock, holding an infant Kiara over one shoulder. Simba and Nala part to let him pass.] on the path unwinding [Rafiki holds up Kiara.] in the Circle... ♪ 
:''[The gathered animals jump for joy.]''
:'''Animals''': [*cheer*]
:'''Chorus''':	 ♪ ...the Circle of Life. [Timon and Pumbaa watch proudly alongside with jungle animal neighborhoods. A baby warthog sidles up next to Pumbaa.] Circle of Life! ♪ 
:'''Kiara''':	*yowls*

== Voice cast ==
* [[w:Donald Glover|Donald McKinley Glover Jr.]] as [[w:Simba|Simba]]
** [[w:JD McCrary|JayDon McCrary]] as Young Simba

* [[Beyoncé|Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter]] as [[w:Nala (The Lion King)|Nala]]
** [[w:Shahadi Wright Joseph|Shahadi Wright Joseph]] as Young Nala

* [[w:Billy Eichner|Billy Eichner]] as [[w:Timon and Pumbaa|Timon]]
* [[w:Seth Rogen|Seth Aaron Rogen]] as [[w:Timon and Pumbaa|Pumbaa]]

* [[James Earl Jones]] as [[w:Mufasa|Mufasa]]

* [[w:Chiwetel Ejiofor|Chiwetel Umeadi Ejiofor]] as [[w:Scar (The Lion King)|Scar]]

* [[w:John Kani|Bonisile John Kani]] as [[w:List of The Lion King (franchise) characters#Rafiki|Rafiki]]

* [[John Oliver|John William Oliver]] as [[w:List of The Lion King (franchise) characters#Zazu|Zazu]]

* [[w:Florence Kasumba|Florence Kasumba]] as [[w:List of The Lion King characters#Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed|Shenzi]]

* [[w:Keegan-Michael Key|Keegan-Michael Key]] as [[w:List of The Lion King characters#Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed|Kamari]]

* [[w:Eric André|Eric Samuel André]] as [[w:List of The Lion King characters#Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed|Azizi]]

* [[Alfre Woodard]] as [[w:List of The Lion King (franchise) characters#Sarabi|Sarabi]]

* [[w:Penny Johnson Jerald|Penny Johnson Jerald]] as [[w:List of The Lion King (franchise) characters#Sarafina|Sarafina]]

* [[w:Amy Sedaris|Amy Louise Sedaris]] as [[w:Guineafowl|Guinea Fowl]]

* [[w:Chance the Rapper|Chancelor Jonathan Bennett]] as [[w:Galago|Bush Baby]]

* Josh McCrary as [[w:Elephant shrew|Elephant Shrew]]

* [[w:Phil LaMarr|Philip LaMarr]] as [[w:Impala|Impala]]

* [[w:J. Lee|J Lee]] as [[w:Hyena|Hyena]]

== External links ==
*{{wikipedia-inline}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}
* {{IMDb title|id=6105098| title=The Lion King}}
{{The Lion King}}
{{Authority control}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Lion King (2019 film), The}}
[[Category:2019 films]]
[[Category:2010s American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated musical films]]
[[Category:American films with live action and animation]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age animated films]]
[[Category:American remake films]]
[[Category:The Lion King]]
[[Category:Films about death]]
[[Category:Films about revenge]]
[[Category:Films set in Africa]]
[[Category:Films set in Tanzania]]
[[Category:Films set in jungles]]
[[Category:Films about brothers]]
[[Category:Films about wildebeests]]
[[Category:Films about father–son relationships]]
[[Category:Films about uncle–nephew relationships]]
[[Category:Films directed by Jon Favreau]]
[[Category:Animated films about death]]
[[Category:Animated films about lions]]
[[Category:Animated films about brothers]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Animated films about father–son relationships]]
[[Category:Animated films set in Tanzania]]
[[Category:Screenplays by Jeff Nathanson]]
[[Category:World record holders]]</text>
      <sha1>8j4d2k10za3kjbc9rec6a39eiktjohc</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Football in England</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>217694</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965045</id>
      <parentid>3957146</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:32:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Bjsports00</username>
        <id>3350104</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965045</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2822" sha1="5h64uybevu92vfcl5zunkdm0juf1ozk" xml:space="preserve">[[File:2026-05-22 - Middlesbrough FC supporters in Trafalgar Square - 09.jpg|thumb]]
[[w:Football in England|Football]] is the most popular sport in [[w:England|England]]. Widely regarded as the birthplace of modern football, the first official rules of the game were established in England in [[1863]]. The country is home to the world's first football league, the oldest national governing body, and the oldest national knockout competition.

==Quotes==
* After dinner all the youths of the city goes out into the fields for the very popular game of ball.
** [[w:William FitzStephen|William FitzStephen]] ca. 1170 quoted in [https://web.archive.org/web/20070418122238/http://www.spartacus.schoolnet.co.uk/Fhistory.htm &quot;Early History of Football&quot;], ''The Encylopedia of British Football''

* All that was missing to have made it a really smart 1972 middle-class party would have been a few reefers, but footballers wouldn't touch such things. Some footballers might have moved into the middle classes but there are two things they won't have at their parties — [[drugs]] and [[homosexuals]].
** [[w:Hunter Davies|Hunter Davies]], ''The Glory Game'' (1972), p.230

* The great fallacy is that the game is first and last about winning. It's nothing of the kind. The game is about glory. It's about doing things in style. With a flourish, it's about going out and beating the other lot, not waiting for them to die of boredom. 
** [[w:Danny Blanchflower|Danny Blanchflower]] quoted in [[w:Hunter Davies|Hunter Davies]], ''The Glory Game'' (1972), p.266

* A slum sport played in slum stadiums, increasingly watched by slum people, who deter decent folk from turning up.
** English football described in a May 1985 ''Sunday Times'' editiorial quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/football/2020/jun/02/how-heysel-tragedy-changed-english-football-clubs-banned-europe &quot;'Quarantine our sad, sick game': how Heysel tragedy changed English football&quot;], ''The Guardian''
[https://www.bjsports.live/premier-league &quot;'EPL Archives - BJ Sports - Cricket &amp; Football Prediction, Live Score&quot;], ''Bj Sports''

* You were kind of an outlier if you even liked football and you were a [[girl]] in [[England]]. So to come over [[w:United States|here]] and have that [[opportunity]]? I've always said [[w:United States|America]] is the land of opportunity. It certainly was for me.
** [[w:Jill Ellis|Jill Ellis]], as quoted in [http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-0602-world-cup-jill-ellis-20150602-story.html &quot;U.S. Coach Jill Ellis' choices put her on the path to Women's World Cup&quot;] (1 June 2015), by Kevin Baxter, ''The Los Angeles Times'', California

==External links==
*{{Wikipedia-inline}}
{{Commonscat|Association football in England}}
[[Category:Association football]]
[[Category:Sport in England]]
[[Category:Football in England| ]]</text>
      <sha1>5h64uybevu92vfcl5zunkdm0juf1ozk</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Smile, Darn Ya, Smile!</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>218991</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965116</id>
      <parentid>3919744</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:46:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965116</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1216" sha1="5mj0bgvl122tlobct1ohgbg1mb0filj" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Smile, Darn Ya, Smile!|Smile, Darn Ya, Smile!]]''''' is a [[w:Merrie Melodies|Merrie Melodies]] cartoon short and also the title of the song performed in the cartoon.

{{film-stub}}
==[[w:Foxy (Merrie Melodies)|Foxy]]==
* ''[during the end credits]'' So long, folks!

==Dialogue==
:''[first lines]''
:'''Foxy''': ''♪ Smile, darn ya, smile! ♪'' 
:''♪ Smile, darn ya, smile! ♪'' 
:''♪ Come on and smile, darn ya, smile! ♪''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[last lines]''
:'''Radio''': ''♪ Make life worthwhile! ♪'' 
:''♪ Come on and smile, darn ya, smile! ♪''

:''[Foxy panting]''
:'''Foxy''': I can't stop!
:''[Foxy screaming]''


==Cast==
* [[w:Foxy (Merrie Melodies)|Foxy]]
* [[w:Roxy (Merrie Melodies)|Roxy]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0022405}}

{{Looney Tunes}}

[[Category:1931 animated films]]
[[Category:1931 American animated films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Rudolf Ising]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Remake films]]
[[Category:Musical comedy films]]
[[Category:Foxy cartoons]]
[[Category:Films about dreams]]
[[Category:Films set on trains]]
[[Category:Rudolf Ising films]]</text>
      <sha1>5mj0bgvl122tlobct1ohgbg1mb0filj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>One More Time (1931 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>218992</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965113</id>
      <parentid>3878669</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:44:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965113</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1674" sha1="r2ldk2fbvg0px8qpyir48fwu3zj94k9" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[file:One More Time 190611 LTGC.webm|thumb|One More Time (1931)]]
'''''[[w:One More Time (1931 film)|One More Time]]''''' is a 1931 black-and-white [[w:Merrie Melodies|Merrie Melodies]] cartoon short produced by [[w:Hugh Harman|Hugh Harman]] and [[w:Rudolf Ising|Rudolf Ising]] and animated by [[w:Friz Freleng|Friz Freleng]] and [[w:Paul Smith (animator)|Paul J. Smith]]. The film is seven minutes in length. It stars [[w:Foxy (Merrie Melodies)|Foxy]] as a Prohibition-era cop dealing with various miscreants. This was Foxy's last theatrical appearance.
==the [[w:Dragon|Dragon]]==
* ♪ I am the watchman, The Dragon, I fear no fox, I fear no canine-thing. ♪

==[[w:Foxy (Merrie Melodies)|Foxy]]==
* ''[during the end credits]'' So long, folks!

==Dialogue==
:''[first lines]''
:'''Foxy''': ''♪ One more time. ♪'' 
:''♪ Just one more time. ♪'' 
:''♪ One more time. ♪''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[last lines of the final cartoon]''
:'''Mugs''': ''♪ No, no more crime! ♪''

==Voice cast==
* [[w:Carman Maxwell|Carman Maxwell]] as Foxy. (uncredited)
* [[w:Billy Bletcher|Billy Bletcher]] as The Dragon (Foxy’s archenemy; uncredited)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0022231}}

{{Looney Tunes}}

[[Category:1931 animated films]]
[[Category:1931 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated musical short films]]
[[Category:Chase films]]
[[Category:Musical comedy films]]
[[Category:Foxy cartoons]]
[[Category:Films directed by Rudolf Ising]]
[[Category:Rudolf Ising films]]</text>
      <sha1>r2ldk2fbvg0px8qpyir48fwu3zj94k9</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mari Alkatiri</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>219970</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964881</id>
      <parentid>3510739</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:05:35Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Staryu</username>
        <id>3148445</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>Grammar</comment>
      <origin>3964881</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1048" sha1="ldri54xwqal8u29lqp8smk8kouof6xy" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Mari Bin Amude Alkatiri 2002.jpg|thumb|Mari Alkatiri in 2002]]

'''[[w:Mari Alkatiri|Mari Alkatiri]]''' (born 26 November 1949) is an [[w:East Timor|East Timorese]] politician. He was the former [[w:Prime Minister of East Timor|Prime Minister]] of [[East Timor]] in 2002–2006 and 2017–2018.


{{political-stub}}

==Quotes==
* Given Greater Sunrise falls within Timor Leste, why does [[Australia]] get any (oil royalties)? It was 50-50 when there were no (sea) boundaries. After they agreed on the boundaries everything was different.
** Mari Alkatiri (2019) cited in: &quot;[https://www.theaustralian.com.au/nation/timors-former-pm-australias-spies-didnt-fool-me/news-story/d684911f8a2e1d41bc8ec38685d22e91 Timor’s former PM: Australia’s spies didn’t fool me]&quot; in ''The Australian'', 28 August 2019.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{commons category|Marí bin Amude Alkatiri}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Alkatiri, Mari}}
[[Category:1949 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Prime Ministers of East Timor]]
[[Category:People from Dili]]</text>
      <sha1>ldri54xwqal8u29lqp8smk8kouof6xy</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Chigozie Obioma</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>221274</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964978</id>
      <parentid>3907483</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:15:35Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964978</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="11103" sha1="gs4lnfsqgnylpfab8w0ajlwqfy2gukh" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Chigozie Obioma 2016.jpg|thumb|Chigozie Obioma in 2016]]
'''[[w:Chigozie Obioma|Chigozie Obioma]]''' (born 1968) is a Nigerian writer and assistant professor at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. He is the author of three novels ''The Fishermen'' (2015), ''An Orchestra of Minorities'' (2019) and ''The Road to the Country'' (2024).

== Quotes ==

* I've always wanted to write something that will show the world that prior to the coming of the British to Nigeria, we had some kind of complex systems. I feel like there hasn't been an African version of, say, Milton's &quot;Paradise Lost&quot; which actually explored the very foundational principle of Western civilization, which would be the free will. Or even Dante Alighieri's &quot;Inferno.&quot; So I wanted to write something cosmological, and the chi has been very fascinating to me. It was very difficult, it entailed a lot of research, even down to actually going to shrines and interviewing the last adherents of Odinani, the Igbo religion, now that most Africans are converts to either Christianity or Islam…
** On what he envisioned for his novel ''An Orchestra of Minorities'' in [https://www.npr.org/2019/01/05/681996078/the-spirit-tells-the-story-in-orchestra-of-minorities “The Spirit Tells The Story In 'Orchestra Of Minorities'”] in NPR (2019 Jan 5)

* I believe that some of the strongest stories we can have begin with very simple archetypes…The great mother, or the great father, for example. And you work your way from that, slowly, to more complexity. The idea of this guy who wants to be with the woman he loves – you can say the same of the movie Gladiator, for instance. If you strip everything down to the basics, it’s just about Maximus wanting to go back to his wife and every other thing stopping him. Even Homer’s Odyssey; he just wants to go back and the entire universe is conspiring against that ambition.
** On archetypes in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2019/jan/18/chigozie-obioma-why-do-my-stories-end-this-way-honestly-i-want-to-write-a-feelgood-story- “'Why Jay?': Chigozie Obioma on the haunting death that inspired his novel”] in ''The Guardian'' (2019 Jan 18)

* There are some rhetorical moves that I wouldn’t be able to make if I didn’t know these languages. In terms of writing figurative language, I probably pull a lot from Yoruba imagery…
** On his first novel ''The Fishermen'' in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2019/jan/18/chigozie-obioma-why-do-my-stories-end-this-way-honestly-i-want-to-write-a-feelgood-story- “'Why Jay?': Chigozie Obioma on the haunting death that inspired his novel”] in ''The Guardian'' (2019 Jan 18)

* People always ask me, why do your stories end this way? And honestly…I want to write a feelgood story. But I think that because I’m fascinated with the metaphysics of existence, I keep thinking why, of all the people who came to Cyprus, was it Jay who died? Or, I read not too long ago of a nine-year-old doing her homework and there’s a drive-by shooting and a bullet comes in through the roof and kills her. She didn’t do anything to deserve that fate. When you think about these things, and you want to write fiction around that, the path it takes you to can feel inevitable and tragic.
** On why his works end on a tragic note (drawn in part from his real-life experience associating with a student named Jay who died untimely) in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2019/jan/18/chigozie-obioma-why-do-my-stories-end-this-way-honestly-i-want-to-write-a-feelgood-story- “'Why Jay?': Chigozie Obioma on the haunting death that inspired his novel”] in ''The Guardian'' (2019 Jan 18)


===''[[w:The Fishermen|The Fishermen]]'' (2015)===

*Hatred is a leech: The thing that sticks to a person's skin; that feeds off them and drains the sap out of one's spirit. It changes a person, and does not leave until it has sucked the last drop of peace from them.

*Mother was a falconer. The one who stood on the hills and watched, trying to stave off whatever ill she perceived was coming to her children. She owned copies of our minds in the pockets of her own mind and so could easily sniff troubles early in their forming, the same way sailors discern the forming foetus of a coming storm.

*I have now come to know that what one believes often becomes permanent, and what become permanent can be indestructible.&lt;br&gt;The things my brother read shaped him; they became his visions. He believed in them. I have now come to know that what one believes often becomes permanent, and what becomes permanent can be indestructible. This was the case with my brother.

*Do you not know that there is nothing the eye can see that can make it shed the tears of blood? Do you not know that there is no loss we cannot overcome

*Listen, days decay, like food, like fish, like dead bodies. This night will decay, too and you will forget. Listen, we will forget.

*That story, as all good stories, planted a seed in my soul and never left me.

*I'd heard someone say that the end of most things often bears a resemblance - even if faint - to their beginnings

*I must have my pound of flesh and you must all join me in this because you caused it.
**Ikenna (Chapter 4: The Python paragraph 4). Importance: Ikenna uses the lashes his father gave him to manipulate his brothers into joining him in getting revenge against the neighbor who told on them for going to the river.

*M.K.O., you are beautiful beyond description,
:Too marvelous for words, 
:The most wonderful of all creatures,
:Like nothing never seen nor heard.
:Who can touch your infinite wisdom?
:Who can fathom the depths of your love?
:M.K.O., you are beautiful beyond description.
:Your majesty is enthroned above.
:* Ikenna, Boja, Obembe, and Ben (Chapter 5: The Metamorphosis paragraph 1). Importance: The boys sing this song and get the attention of M.K.O. as he is campaigning. He brings them up front at his political rally and awards them scholarships.

*We did it. We avenged them 
**Ike and Boja.Obembe (Chapter 16 paragraph 9). Importance: Obembe was finally satisfied that the deaths of his brothers...

=== [[w:An Orchestra of Minorities|An Orchestra of Minorities]] (2019) ===
* Even in his most extroverted moment, a man is concealed from others. For he cannot be fully known.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* They were the minorities of this world whose only recourse was to join this universal orchestra in which all there was to do was cry and wail.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* Time is not a living creature that can listen to pleas, nor is it a man who can delay.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* The true being of a man is hidden behind the wall of flesh and blood from the eyes of everyone else, including his own.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* For the truth remains that more can also be more, and that less is often inevitably less.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* Guardian spirits of mankind, have we thought about the powers that passion creates in human beings? Have we considered why a man could run through a field of fire to get to a woman he loves? Have we thought about the impact of love on the body of lovers? Have we considered the symmetry of its power? Have we considered what poetry incites in their souls, and the impress of endearments on a softened heart?”
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* All the peace that had returned after his father finished mourning his wife for many years vanished at once. Grief returned like an army of old ants crawling into familiar holes in the soft earth of his father’s life.....
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]

* Loneliness is the violent dog that barks interminably through the long night of grief.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/56281537-an-orchestra-of-minorities#:~:text=They%20were%20the%20minorities%20of,do%20was%20cry%20and%20wail.&amp;text=Time%20is%20not%20a%20living,a%20man%20who%20can%20delay.]
*in Umuahia, a town in the land of the great fathers...
** Chapter 1
*You’re a beautiful man.
** Chapter 4
* &quot;Stories are one of the oldest ways human beings have tried to understand themselves and the world around them.&quot;
** [https://thecommononline.org/chigozie-obioma-in-conversation/ Reflecting on the importance of storytelling]

* &quot;Every novel teaches me that writing is an act of humility because each book demands that you learn everything again.&quot;
** [https://thecommononline.org/chigozie-obioma-in-conversation/ On the writing process]

* &quot;I don't think literature changes the world directly. It changes people, and people change the world.&quot;
** [https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts Speaking on the influence of literature]

* &quot;The novelist's first responsibility is to tell the truth of the story, wherever that truth leads.&quot;
** [https://lithub.com/ Interview on fiction and responsibility]

* &quot;I grew up listening to stories before I ever imagined writing them.&quot;
** [https://www.theparisreview.org/blog/ Interview on his childhood and storytelling]

* &quot;What fascinates me most is the mystery of why human beings become who they become.&quot;
** [https://electricliterature.com/ Interview on character and destiny]

* &quot;Writing allows me to preserve worlds that are disappearing before our eyes.&quot;
** [https://www.worldliteraturetoday.org/ Interview on memory and culture]

* &quot;A novel should leave readers asking deeper questions rather than offering easy answers.&quot;
** [https://www.asymptotejournal.com/interview/ Interview on the purpose of fiction]
== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
*[https://www.bookrags.com/studyguide-orchestra-of-minorities/quotes.html#gsc.tab=0An Orchestra of Minorities]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Obioma, Chigozie}}
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Short story writers]]
[[Category:Academics from Nigeria]]
[[Category:1968 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>gs4lnfsqgnylpfab8w0ajlwqfy2gukh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>221558</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964926</id>
      <parentid>3921075</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:01:40Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964926</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="23260" sha1="38zun2xctnjhf7wbyi4fz1mwg4gm19a" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Path Sanchalan Bhopal-1.jpg|thumb|These people have the blood of Mahatma Gandhi on their hands and pious disclaimers and dissociation now have no meaning. —[[Jawaharlal Nehru]]]]
The '''[[w:Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh|Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh]]''' ('''RSS'''; National Volunteer Union or National Volunteer Corps) is an Indian [[Right-wing politics|right-wing]] [[Hindutva]] volunteer [[w:paramilitary|paramilitary]] organisation. It is the progenitor and leader of a large body of Hindutva organisations called the [[w:Sangh Parivar|Sangh Parivar]] ([[Hindi]] for &quot;Sangh family&quot;), which has developed a presence in all facets of Indian society and includes the [[Bharatiya Janata Party]], the ruling political party under [[Narendra Modi]], the prime minister of India. [[Mohan Bhagwat]] currently serves as the [[w:List of leaders of the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh#Sarsanghchalak|sarsanghchalak]] (Chief) of the RSS, with [[w:Dattatreya Hosabale|Dattatreya Hosabale]] serving as the [[w:List of leaders of the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh#Sarkaryavah|sarkaryavah]] (General Secretary).

==Quotes ==
* During [[The Emergency (India)|the Emergency]] period some followers of the [[Jamaat-e-Islami]] found themselves in the same jail as the members of the RSS; here they began to discover that the latter were no monsters as described by the '[[Nationalism|nationalist]]' and [[Secularism in India|secularist]] propaganda. Therefore they began to think better of the [[Hindu|Hindus]]. This alarmed the [[Secularism in India|secularists]] and the interested [[wikipedia:Maulvi|Maulvis]]. Some Maulvis belonging to the [[wikipedia:Jamiat-ul-Ulema-i-Hind|Jamiat-ul-Ulema-i-Hind]] met President.. [[Fakhruddin Ahmad]], and reported to him about the growing rapport between the members of the two communities. This 'stunned' the President and he said that this boded an 'ominous' future for [[Indian National Congress|Congress]] [[Islam in India|Muslim]] leaders and he promised that he would speak to [[Indira Gandhi|Indiraji]] about this dangerous development and ensure that Muslims remain Muslims.
** Fakhruddin Ahmad. Lal, K. S. (1999). Theory and practice of Muslim state in India. New Delhi: Aditya Prakashan. Chapter 6 (quoting Ram Swarup and citing Fakhruddin Ahmad and My Eleven Years with Fakhruddin Ahmad by Fazle Ahmed Rehmany)

* [[Nonviolence|Non-violence]] and the advice given by Mrs. [[w:Sucheta_Kripalani|Sucheta Kripalani]], [[Mahatma Gandhi]] and Dr. [[Rajendra Prasad]], etc., to stay out where they were with a firm trust in God appeared to most of the victims as a counsel of perfection which could only be given from a safe distance. Who else came to the rescue of the people at this stage, but a band of young selfless Hindus- popularly known as the RSS? They organised in every [[w:Mohalla|Mohalla]] of every town of the province the work of evacuation of the [[Hindu]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] women and children from dangerous pockets t comparatively safe centres. They organised for their feeding, medical aid, clothing and care. Parties for the protection of institutions were organised. Even fire engine brigades were formed. in various towns. Arrangements for transport by lorries and uses and provision of escort on the trains carrying the fleeing Hindus and Sikhs were organised. Day and night vigils in various Hindu and Sikh localities were kept up and people were taught how to defend themselves when attacked. When the Situation on the eve of [[Partition of India|Partition]] became very serious and law and order utterly broke down-or it would be more correct to say, was now used only to suppress the Hindus and Sikhs,— several members of the RSS showed their proficiency in the use of fire [[Weapon|weapons]]. it almost became a tit for tat. These young men were the first to come to the help of the stricken Hindus and Sikhs and were the last to leave their places for safety in the [[w:East_Punjab|East Punjab]]. I could name several [[Indian National Congress|Congress]] leaders of note in the various districts of [[Punjab]] who openly solicited the help of the RSS even for their own protection and the protection of their kith and kin. No request for help from any quarter was refused and there are cases which came to our notice where the Muslim women and children were safely escorted out of the Hindu Mohallas and sent to [[Muslim League]] refugee centres in [[Lahore]] by the RSS men.
* I also found during my tour of the East Punjab a deep: sense of gratitude and gratefulness to the Sikhs and the Sanghies among the masses. They were considered the saviours of the people and it was a universal belief that they had made the rehabilitation of a part of the Hindu and Sikh refugees possible in the East Punjab. A few lakhs of them had at least found a temporary shelter in the vacated house and lands. Judging in the light of subsequent history of rehabilitation of refugees, one shudders to think of what would have happened to these refugees if like the other unfortunate refugees they had also to seek shelter in refugee camps and on road-side...
* Their (RSS) discipline, their physical fitness and their selflessness in face of dangers came to the rescue of the people in the [[Punjab]] when the whole province was burning and when the Congress leaders were helplessly fiddling at [[New Delhi]], not being able to overcome the opposition of the Muslim League and the obstinacy of the [[Louis Mountbatten, 1st Earl Mountbatten of Burma|Governor-General]] to their proposal for stronger action for the maintenance of law and order. If now somebody from a place outside the Punjab were to call upon the Hindus and Sikhs of the Punjab to disown the Sikhs and RSS- heroes who defended them gloriously, his advice is sure to fall. on absolutely deaf ears.
* The refugees from the [[w:West_Pakistan|West Pakistan]] —all of them without exception wherever they are living in India, to a man are grateful to RSS for coming to their help at a time when they felt deserted by all.
**A.N. Bali, ''Now It Can Be Told'', pp. 137-47. Quoted in [https://archive.org/stream/the-tragic-story-of-partition-hv-sheshasdri/The%20Tragic%20Story%20of%20Partition%20-%20HV%20Sheshasdri_djvu.txt]

*Many [[Working class|workers]] appear to take a delight in blaming others for all ills. Some may put the blame on the political perversities, others on the aggressive activities of the [[Christianity|Christians]] or [[Muslim|Muslims]] and such other faiths. Let our [[Working class|workers]] keep their minds free from such tendencies and work for our people and our [[Dharma]] in the right spirit, lend a helping hand to all our brethren who need help and strive to relieve distress wherever we see it. In this service no distinction should be made between man and man. We have to serve all, be he a Christian or a Muslim or a human being of any other persuasion; for, calamities, distress and misfortunes make no such distinction but afflict all alike. And in serving to relieve the sufferings of man let it not be in a spirit of condescension or mere compassion but as devoted worship of the Lord abiding in the heart of all beings, in the true spirit of our dharma of surrendering our all in the humble service of Him who is Father, Mother, Brother, Friend and Everything to us all. And may our actions succeed in bringing out the Glory and Effulgence of our Sanatana-Eternal - [[Dharma]].
**M.S. Golwalkar: Bunch of Thoughts

*A reading of the RSS history tells us that seva has always been at the core of [[Hindutva]] praxis. Since its inception, an important aspect of the organization’s work revolved around providing service in the form of relief during natural and political calamities such as the [[Partition of India]] in 1947, the [[w:Assam_earthquake|Assam earthquake]] of 1950, the [[w:Punjab_Floods|Punjab Floods]] in 1955, the [[w:Tamil_Nadu_cyclone|Tamil Nadu cyclone]] in 1955, the [[w:Anjar_earthquake|Anjar earthquake]] in 1956, the [[w:Andhra_Cyclone|Andhra Cyclone]] of 1977, the Latur earthquake of 1993, the Odisha Super Cyclone in 1999, the Bhuj earthquake in 2001, Koshi River Floods in 2008 and most recently the Uttarakhand Floods in 2013. Apart from creating a humanitarian and compassionate image for itself, _ relief interventions after these disasters also provided opportunities to the RSS to undertake cadre building and consolidate its organizational network.
**About Humanitarian aid and the RSS (the largest nongovernmental organization in the world). Disaster Relief and The RSS: Resurrecting 'Religion' Through Humanitarianism,  Malini Bhattacharjee

* In both [[India]] and [[Pakistan]] civilian politics have taken on a military tinge, with some political parties sponsoring paramilitary organisations whose members wear uniforms, march in formation with flags and carry sticks to menace their opponents. Or in the case of India’s [[Bharatiya Janata Party]] (BJP) it looks more as though the paramilitary Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh (RSS) sponsors it.
** [[Margaret MacMillan]], ''War: How Conflict Shapes Us'' (2020)  

* [[Bhagwa Dhwaj|Bhagva Dhwaj]]  represents the tradition and history of the Hindus, the saints and sages from Vedic times and all heroes of [[History of India|Hindu history]]. It is the undisputable Guru of all those who call themselves Hindus.
**Festival, Shree Vishwa Niketan, Delhi, 16-7-1999.

*Any Indian who comes with the intention to settle in Kashmir will be treated as an agent of RSS and not as a civilian and will be dealt with appropriately.
**June 1, 2020. statement by TRF--a front of the banned Pakistani terror outfit Lashkar-e-Taiba--&quot;openly&quot; declared that &quot;any Indian who comes with the intention to settle in Kashmir will be treated as an agent of RSS and not as a civilian and will be dealt with appropriately&quot;. [https://economictimes.indiatimes.com/news/defence/the-resistance-front-echoes-pakistan-pm-on-bjp-confirming-links-with-rawalpindi/articleshow/76157139.cms] [https://www.timesnownews.com/india/article/non-locals-to-be-considered-dealt-with-as-rss-agents-jk-terror-outfit-issues-open-threat/599700][https://www.outlookindia.com/newsscroll/trf-threatens-to-kill-indians-who-plan-to-settle-down-in-kashmir/1852361] [https://swarajyamag.com/insta/jk-terror-outfit-trf-threatens-to-kill-indians-who-plan-to-settle-down-in-kashmir]

* The realms of high culture that in more civilised countries resonate with [[literature]], [[music]] and [[art]] are occupied in India by [[Bollywood]] and trashy [[Television|TV]] serials. Inevitable, since mass [[Education in India|education]] is such a mess that most children leave school without learning to read a storybook. Reading is so out of fashion that most small towns in India have no bookshops, most villages have no libraries and, in our bigger cities, bookshops stock mostly books and magazines written in [[English language|English]]. So when the RSS leaders turned up in [[Delhi]] last week to tell the Minister of Human Resource Development that they wanted changes in [[Education in India|school education]], they had a point. Unfortunately, because the RSS is led by doddering old bigots and provincial intellectuals, this ‘cultural’ organisation is in no position to give the HRD Minister worthwhile advice. The RSS leaders who met the minister reportedly confined their concerns to history books that they claim portray a ‘Western’ view of history.  They demanded that these books be replaced by those written by historians with an Indian view of history. They have a point, but they make it badly. [...] In the interests of '[[Secularism in India|secularism]]', most Indian schools and colleges provide only limited courses for the study of [[ancient India]], {{w|Vedic Hinduism}} and [[Sanskrit]] literature. So the vast majority of Indian children grow up with a sense of being Indian that is restricted to a religious identity. When this gets infused with a toxic sort of [[Hindu nationalism|nationalism]], as happens in RSS educational institutions, the result is [[bigotry]] of a lethal kind.
** [[Tavleen Singh]], ''[https://indianexpress.com/article/opinion/columns/fifth-column-cultural-renewal/ Fifth column: Cultural renewal] (November 2, 2014), ''{{w|The Indian Express}}''

*“RSS is a revolutionary organisation. No other organisation in the country comes anywhere near it. It alone has the capacity to transform society, end casteism and wipe the tears from the eyes of the poor. I have great expectations from this revolutionary organisation that has taken up the challenge of creating a new India.”
**–Shri Jai Prakash Narayan, 1977 After the emergency, on Nov.3, 1977, JP addressed a huge RSS training camp in Patna. Excerpt from that speech quoted from     Ratan Sharda - RSS 360 °_ Demystifying Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh-Bloomsbury India (2018)

* It has been found that in several parts of the country individual members of Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh have indulged in acts of violence involving arson, robbery, dacoity and murder and have collected illicit arms and ammunition. They have been found circulating leaflets exhorting people to resort to terrorist methods, to collect fire arms, to create disaffection against the government and suborn the police and the military.
** From Indian government's communique declaring the RSS unlawful, February 4, 1948. Text quoted in Appendix III, D. R. Goyal, ''Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh'', p. 251. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* The idea of [[Fascism]] vividly brings out the conception of unity amongst peoples. India and particularly Hindu India need some such Institution for the military regeneration of the Hindus… Our Institution of Rashtriya Svayamsewak Sangh of Nagpur under [[Hedgewar|Dr Hedgewar]] is of this kind, though quite independently conceived.
** [[B. S. Moonje]], March 1931, Moonje papers, Nehru Memorial Museum and Library, New Delhi. Quoted in [https://scroll.in/article/1025485/ramachandra-guha-hindutva-has-strong-links-with-fascism-but-todays-leaders-want-to-forget-them &quot;Ramachandra Guha: Hindutva has strong links with fascism – but today’s leaders want to forget them&quot;], ''Scroll.in'', June 5, 2022.

* We have a great deal of evidence to show that the R.S.S. is an organization which is in the nature of a private army and which is definitely proceeding on strictest [[Nazism|Nazi]] lines, even following the technique of organization. […] The Nazi party brought [[Germany]] to ruin and I have little doubt that if these tendencies are allowed to spread and increase in India, they would do enormous injury to India.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', December 7, 1947, Vol. 1, pp. 33-34. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* These people have the blood of Mahatma Gandhi on their hands and pious disclaimers and dissociation now have no meaning.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], letter to the Punjab Chief Minister, February 11, 1948, ''Selected Works Of Jawaharlal Nehru'', 2nd series, Vol. 5, p. 53, cited in Sucheta Mahajan, Independence and Partition, p. 320. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* Reports from many sources have reached me that the communal atmosphere is again becoming tense, and that particularly the people who belong to the RSS…are becoming vocal and demonstrative again…. Many of the RSS men who had been arrested previously, detained in prison for sometime and then subsequently released, are again taking part in these activities in spite of assurances they might have given.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', May 2, 1948, Vol. 1, p. 114. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* As you know, the ban on the RSS has been removed…. This does not mean that we are convinced about the bona fides of the RSS movement…. Our general relaxation in the field of [[Civil and political rights|civil liberties]] will certainly not mean the slightest relaxation in meeting violence against the individual or the state, wherever it occurs and whatever form it might take.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', July 20, 1949, Vol. 1, pp. 412-3. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* …RSS is again resuming some of its activities…. The whole mentality of the RSS is a fascist mentality. Therefore, their activities have to be very closely watched.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', August 1, 1949, Vol. 1, p. 428. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* The activities of the RSS constituted a clear threat to the existence of [[Government of India|Government and the state]].
** [[Sardar Patel]], letter to [[Syama Prasad Mookerjee]], July 18, 1948, ''Sardar Patel Correspondence'', vol. VI, p. 323. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* Organising the Hindus and helping them is one thing but going in for revenge for its sufferings on innocent and helpless men, women and children is quite another thing…apart from this, their opposition to the Congress, that to of such virulence, disregarding all considerations of personality, decay of decorum, created a kind of unrest among the people. All their speeches were fill of communal poison. It was not necessary to spread poison in order to enthuse the Hindus and organise for their protection. As a final result of the poison, the country had to suffer the sacrifice of the invaluable life of Gandhiji. Even an iota of the sympathy of the Government, or of the people, no more remained for the RSS. In face opposition grew. Opposition turned more severe, when the RSS men expressed joy and distributed sweets after Gandhiji’s death. Under these conditions, it became inevitable for the Government to take action against the RSS…Since then over six months have elapsed. We had hoped that after this lapse of time, with full and proper consideration, the RSS persons would come to the right path. But from the reports that come to me, it is evident that attempts to put fresh life into their same old activities are afoot.
** [[Sardar Patel]], letter to [[Golwalkar]], September 11, 1948. In ''Justice on Trial'', RSS, Bangalore, 1962, pp. 26-28.

* RSS was explicitly influenced by European fascist movements, its leading politicians regularly praised Hitler and Mussolini in the late 1930s and 1940s.
** [[Jason Stanley]], [https://www.google.com/books/edition/How_Fascism_Works/NARIDwAAQBAJ?hl=en&amp;gbpv=0 ''How Fascism Works: The Politics of Us and Them''] (2018), New York: Random House. pp. 14–15.

*“When I read today all the subversive, communal propaganda the media attributes to RSS shakhas, I am frankly baffled. My memories of what happened at our shakha between 6 and 7 p.m. each weekday evening are completely different—we marched about in our khaki shorts, did some yoga, worked out in a traditional outdoor gymnasium with no fancy equipment, sang songs and chanted Sanskrit verses that we did not understand the meanings of, played games and had a bunch of fun with our fellows.”.... “The whole thing was overseen by a team of mostly-well-meaning—if not always inspirational—adults, who truly believed they were helping raise good ‘civilian soldiers’— boys respectful of authority, well-behaved in the presence of adults and well-aware of the importance of physical fitness— who would put their efforts into nation-building when they grew up.” 
**Milind Soman, in his memoir &quot;Made in India&quot;. Quoted from [https://www.opindia.com/2020/03/milind-soman-book-rss-shakha-sanghi-liberal-meltdown/ Liberals suffer meltdown on social media after actor Milind Soman reveals his ‘Sanghi’ background]

* It should be obvious to anybody that the most vicious anti-RSS propaganda is at heart anti Hindu propaganda. So long as the RSS is identified with Hinduism in one form or another, it would invite this attack.... But while the enemies of the RSS have worked themselves up to a frenzied point and have whipped up their tirade, the propaganda itself is losing its appeal with the thinking people....
**Ram Swarup, Hinduism and monotheistic religions (2009)

==See also==
*[[Rajendra Singh]]
*[[H.V. Sheshadri]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Politics of India]]
[[Category:India]]
[[Category:Hindu nationalism]]</text>
      <sha1>38zun2xctnjhf7wbyi4fz1mwg4gm19a</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964928</id>
      <parentid>3964926</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:04:21Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964928</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="23815" sha1="5dha2bmjekhjtr7ktme2mck1pqy3mks" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Path Sanchalan Bhopal-1.jpg|thumb|These people have the blood of Mahatma Gandhi on their hands and pious disclaimers and dissociation now have no meaning. —[[Jawaharlal Nehru]]]]
The '''[[w:Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh|Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh]]''' ('''RSS'''; National Volunteer Union or National Volunteer Corps) is an Indian [[Right-wing politics|right-wing]] [[Hindutva]] volunteer [[w:paramilitary|paramilitary]] organisation. It is the progenitor and leader of a large body of Hindutva organisations called the [[w:Sangh Parivar|Sangh Parivar]] ([[Hindi]] for &quot;Sangh family&quot;), which has developed a presence in all facets of Indian society and includes the [[Bharatiya Janata Party]], the ruling political party under [[Narendra Modi]], the prime minister of India. [[Mohan Bhagwat]] currently serves as the [[w:List of leaders of the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh#Sarsanghchalak|sarsanghchalak]] (Chief) of the RSS, with [[w:Dattatreya Hosabale|Dattatreya Hosabale]] serving as the [[w:List of leaders of the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh#Sarkaryavah|sarkaryavah]] (General Secretary).

==Quotes ==
[[File:राष्ट्रीय स्वयंसेवक संघ संचलन २०२३.jpg|thumb|We have a great deal of evidence to show that the R.S.S. is an organization which is in the nature of a private army and which is definitely proceeding on strictest [[Nazism|Nazi]] lines, even following the technique of organization. […] The Nazi party brought [[Germany]] to ruin and I have little doubt that if these tendencies are allowed to spread and increase in India, they would do enormous injury to India. —[[Jawaharlal Nehru]]]]
* During [[The Emergency (India)|the Emergency]] period some followers of the [[Jamaat-e-Islami]] found themselves in the same jail as the members of the RSS; here they began to discover that the latter were no monsters as described by the '[[Nationalism|nationalist]]' and [[Secularism in India|secularist]] propaganda. Therefore they began to think better of the [[Hindu|Hindus]]. This alarmed the [[Secularism in India|secularists]] and the interested [[wikipedia:Maulvi|Maulvis]]. Some Maulvis belonging to the [[wikipedia:Jamiat-ul-Ulema-i-Hind|Jamiat-ul-Ulema-i-Hind]] met President.. [[Fakhruddin Ahmad]], and reported to him about the growing rapport between the members of the two communities. This 'stunned' the President and he said that this boded an 'ominous' future for [[Indian National Congress|Congress]] [[Islam in India|Muslim]] leaders and he promised that he would speak to [[Indira Gandhi|Indiraji]] about this dangerous development and ensure that Muslims remain Muslims.
** Fakhruddin Ahmad. Lal, K. S. (1999). Theory and practice of Muslim state in India. New Delhi: Aditya Prakashan. Chapter 6 (quoting Ram Swarup and citing Fakhruddin Ahmad and My Eleven Years with Fakhruddin Ahmad by Fazle Ahmed Rehmany)

* [[Nonviolence|Non-violence]] and the advice given by Mrs. [[w:Sucheta_Kripalani|Sucheta Kripalani]], [[Mahatma Gandhi]] and Dr. [[Rajendra Prasad]], etc., to stay out where they were with a firm trust in God appeared to most of the victims as a counsel of perfection which could only be given from a safe distance. Who else came to the rescue of the people at this stage, but a band of young selfless Hindus- popularly known as the RSS? They organised in every [[w:Mohalla|Mohalla]] of every town of the province the work of evacuation of the [[Hindu]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] women and children from dangerous pockets t comparatively safe centres. They organised for their feeding, medical aid, clothing and care. Parties for the protection of institutions were organised. Even fire engine brigades were formed. in various towns. Arrangements for transport by lorries and uses and provision of escort on the trains carrying the fleeing Hindus and Sikhs were organised. Day and night vigils in various Hindu and Sikh localities were kept up and people were taught how to defend themselves when attacked. When the Situation on the eve of [[Partition of India|Partition]] became very serious and law and order utterly broke down-or it would be more correct to say, was now used only to suppress the Hindus and Sikhs,— several members of the RSS showed their proficiency in the use of fire [[Weapon|weapons]]. it almost became a tit for tat. These young men were the first to come to the help of the stricken Hindus and Sikhs and were the last to leave their places for safety in the [[w:East_Punjab|East Punjab]]. I could name several [[Indian National Congress|Congress]] leaders of note in the various districts of [[Punjab]] who openly solicited the help of the RSS even for their own protection and the protection of their kith and kin. No request for help from any quarter was refused and there are cases which came to our notice where the Muslim women and children were safely escorted out of the Hindu Mohallas and sent to [[Muslim League]] refugee centres in [[Lahore]] by the RSS men.
* I also found during my tour of the East Punjab a deep: sense of gratitude and gratefulness to the Sikhs and the Sanghies among the masses. They were considered the saviours of the people and it was a universal belief that they had made the rehabilitation of a part of the Hindu and Sikh refugees possible in the East Punjab. A few lakhs of them had at least found a temporary shelter in the vacated house and lands. Judging in the light of subsequent history of rehabilitation of refugees, one shudders to think of what would have happened to these refugees if like the other unfortunate refugees they had also to seek shelter in refugee camps and on road-side...
* Their (RSS) discipline, their physical fitness and their selflessness in face of dangers came to the rescue of the people in the [[Punjab]] when the whole province was burning and when the Congress leaders were helplessly fiddling at [[New Delhi]], not being able to overcome the opposition of the Muslim League and the obstinacy of the [[Louis Mountbatten, 1st Earl Mountbatten of Burma|Governor-General]] to their proposal for stronger action for the maintenance of law and order. If now somebody from a place outside the Punjab were to call upon the Hindus and Sikhs of the Punjab to disown the Sikhs and RSS- heroes who defended them gloriously, his advice is sure to fall. on absolutely deaf ears.
* The refugees from the [[w:West_Pakistan|West Pakistan]] —all of them without exception wherever they are living in India, to a man are grateful to RSS for coming to their help at a time when they felt deserted by all.
**A.N. Bali, ''Now It Can Be Told'', pp. 137-47. Quoted in [https://archive.org/stream/the-tragic-story-of-partition-hv-sheshasdri/The%20Tragic%20Story%20of%20Partition%20-%20HV%20Sheshasdri_djvu.txt]

*Many [[Working class|workers]] appear to take a delight in blaming others for all ills. Some may put the blame on the political perversities, others on the aggressive activities of the [[Christianity|Christians]] or [[Muslim|Muslims]] and such other faiths. Let our [[Working class|workers]] keep their minds free from such tendencies and work for our people and our [[Dharma]] in the right spirit, lend a helping hand to all our brethren who need help and strive to relieve distress wherever we see it. In this service no distinction should be made between man and man. We have to serve all, be he a Christian or a Muslim or a human being of any other persuasion; for, calamities, distress and misfortunes make no such distinction but afflict all alike. And in serving to relieve the sufferings of man let it not be in a spirit of condescension or mere compassion but as devoted worship of the Lord abiding in the heart of all beings, in the true spirit of our dharma of surrendering our all in the humble service of Him who is Father, Mother, Brother, Friend and Everything to us all. And may our actions succeed in bringing out the Glory and Effulgence of our Sanatana-Eternal - [[Dharma]].
**M.S. Golwalkar: Bunch of Thoughts

*A reading of the RSS history tells us that seva has always been at the core of [[Hindutva]] praxis. Since its inception, an important aspect of the organization’s work revolved around providing service in the form of relief during natural and political calamities such as the [[Partition of India]] in 1947, the [[w:Assam_earthquake|Assam earthquake]] of 1950, the [[w:Punjab_Floods|Punjab Floods]] in 1955, the [[w:Tamil_Nadu_cyclone|Tamil Nadu cyclone]] in 1955, the [[w:Anjar_earthquake|Anjar earthquake]] in 1956, the [[w:Andhra_Cyclone|Andhra Cyclone]] of 1977, the Latur earthquake of 1993, the Odisha Super Cyclone in 1999, the Bhuj earthquake in 2001, Koshi River Floods in 2008 and most recently the Uttarakhand Floods in 2013. Apart from creating a humanitarian and compassionate image for itself, _ relief interventions after these disasters also provided opportunities to the RSS to undertake cadre building and consolidate its organizational network.
**About Humanitarian aid and the RSS (the largest nongovernmental organization in the world). Disaster Relief and The RSS: Resurrecting 'Religion' Through Humanitarianism,  Malini Bhattacharjee

* In both [[India]] and [[Pakistan]] civilian politics have taken on a military tinge, with some political parties sponsoring paramilitary organisations whose members wear uniforms, march in formation with flags and carry sticks to menace their opponents. Or in the case of India’s [[Bharatiya Janata Party]] (BJP) it looks more as though the paramilitary Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh (RSS) sponsors it.
** [[Margaret MacMillan]], ''War: How Conflict Shapes Us'' (2020)  

* [[Bhagwa Dhwaj|Bhagva Dhwaj]]  represents the tradition and history of the Hindus, the saints and sages from Vedic times and all heroes of [[History of India|Hindu history]]. It is the undisputable Guru of all those who call themselves Hindus.
**Festival, Shree Vishwa Niketan, Delhi, 16-7-1999.

*Any Indian who comes with the intention to settle in Kashmir will be treated as an agent of RSS and not as a civilian and will be dealt with appropriately.
**June 1, 2020. statement by TRF--a front of the banned Pakistani terror outfit Lashkar-e-Taiba--&quot;openly&quot; declared that &quot;any Indian who comes with the intention to settle in Kashmir will be treated as an agent of RSS and not as a civilian and will be dealt with appropriately&quot;. [https://economictimes.indiatimes.com/news/defence/the-resistance-front-echoes-pakistan-pm-on-bjp-confirming-links-with-rawalpindi/articleshow/76157139.cms] [https://www.timesnownews.com/india/article/non-locals-to-be-considered-dealt-with-as-rss-agents-jk-terror-outfit-issues-open-threat/599700][https://www.outlookindia.com/newsscroll/trf-threatens-to-kill-indians-who-plan-to-settle-down-in-kashmir/1852361] [https://swarajyamag.com/insta/jk-terror-outfit-trf-threatens-to-kill-indians-who-plan-to-settle-down-in-kashmir]

* The realms of high culture that in more civilised countries resonate with [[literature]], [[music]] and [[art]] are occupied in India by [[Bollywood]] and trashy [[Television|TV]] serials. Inevitable, since mass [[Education in India|education]] is such a mess that most children leave school without learning to read a storybook. Reading is so out of fashion that most small towns in India have no bookshops, most villages have no libraries and, in our bigger cities, bookshops stock mostly books and magazines written in [[English language|English]]. So when the RSS leaders turned up in [[Delhi]] last week to tell the Minister of Human Resource Development that they wanted changes in [[Education in India|school education]], they had a point. Unfortunately, because the RSS is led by doddering old bigots and provincial intellectuals, this ‘cultural’ organisation is in no position to give the HRD Minister worthwhile advice. The RSS leaders who met the minister reportedly confined their concerns to history books that they claim portray a ‘Western’ view of history.  They demanded that these books be replaced by those written by historians with an Indian view of history. They have a point, but they make it badly. [...] In the interests of '[[Secularism in India|secularism]]', most Indian schools and colleges provide only limited courses for the study of [[ancient India]], {{w|Vedic Hinduism}} and [[Sanskrit]] literature. So the vast majority of Indian children grow up with a sense of being Indian that is restricted to a religious identity. When this gets infused with a toxic sort of [[Hindu nationalism|nationalism]], as happens in RSS educational institutions, the result is [[bigotry]] of a lethal kind.
** [[Tavleen Singh]], ''[https://indianexpress.com/article/opinion/columns/fifth-column-cultural-renewal/ Fifth column: Cultural renewal] (November 2, 2014), ''{{w|The Indian Express}}''

*“RSS is a revolutionary organisation. No other organisation in the country comes anywhere near it. It alone has the capacity to transform society, end casteism and wipe the tears from the eyes of the poor. I have great expectations from this revolutionary organisation that has taken up the challenge of creating a new India.”
**–Shri Jai Prakash Narayan, 1977 After the emergency, on Nov.3, 1977, JP addressed a huge RSS training camp in Patna. Excerpt from that speech quoted from     Ratan Sharda - RSS 360 °_ Demystifying Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh-Bloomsbury India (2018)

* It has been found that in several parts of the country individual members of Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh have indulged in acts of violence involving arson, robbery, dacoity and murder and have collected illicit arms and ammunition. They have been found circulating leaflets exhorting people to resort to terrorist methods, to collect fire arms, to create disaffection against the government and suborn the police and the military.
** From Indian government's communique declaring the RSS unlawful, February 4, 1948. Text quoted in Appendix III, D. R. Goyal, ''Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh'', p. 251. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* The idea of [[Fascism]] vividly brings out the conception of unity amongst peoples. India and particularly Hindu India need some such Institution for the military regeneration of the Hindus… Our Institution of Rashtriya Svayamsewak Sangh of Nagpur under [[Hedgewar|Dr Hedgewar]] is of this kind, though quite independently conceived.
** [[B. S. Moonje]], March 1931, Moonje papers, Nehru Memorial Museum and Library, New Delhi. Quoted in [https://scroll.in/article/1025485/ramachandra-guha-hindutva-has-strong-links-with-fascism-but-todays-leaders-want-to-forget-them &quot;Ramachandra Guha: Hindutva has strong links with fascism – but today’s leaders want to forget them&quot;], ''Scroll.in'', June 5, 2022.

* We have a great deal of evidence to show that the R.S.S. is an organization which is in the nature of a private army and which is definitely proceeding on strictest [[Nazism|Nazi]] lines, even following the technique of organization. […] The Nazi party brought [[Germany]] to ruin and I have little doubt that if these tendencies are allowed to spread and increase in India, they would do enormous injury to India.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', December 7, 1947, Vol. 1, pp. 33-34. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* These people have the blood of Mahatma Gandhi on their hands and pious disclaimers and dissociation now have no meaning.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], letter to the Punjab Chief Minister, February 11, 1948, ''Selected Works Of Jawaharlal Nehru'', 2nd series, Vol. 5, p. 53, cited in Sucheta Mahajan, Independence and Partition, p. 320. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* Reports from many sources have reached me that the communal atmosphere is again becoming tense, and that particularly the people who belong to the RSS…are becoming vocal and demonstrative again…. Many of the RSS men who had been arrested previously, detained in prison for sometime and then subsequently released, are again taking part in these activities in spite of assurances they might have given.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', May 2, 1948, Vol. 1, p. 114. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* As you know, the ban on the RSS has been removed…. This does not mean that we are convinced about the bona fides of the RSS movement…. Our general relaxation in the field of [[Civil and political rights|civil liberties]] will certainly not mean the slightest relaxation in meeting violence against the individual or the state, wherever it occurs and whatever form it might take.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', July 20, 1949, Vol. 1, pp. 412-3. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* …RSS is again resuming some of its activities…. The whole mentality of the RSS is a fascist mentality. Therefore, their activities have to be very closely watched.
** [[Jawaharlal Nehru]], ''Letters to Chief Ministers'', August 1, 1949, Vol. 1, p. 428. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* The activities of the RSS constituted a clear threat to the existence of [[Government of India|Government and the state]].
** [[Sardar Patel]], letter to [[Syama Prasad Mookerjee]], July 18, 1948, ''Sardar Patel Correspondence'', vol. VI, p. 323. Quoted in {{w|Mridula Mukherjee}}. [https://www.jstor.org/stable/44147511 “Sectional President’s Address: COMMUNAL THREAT AND SECULAR RESISTANCE.”] ''Proceedings of the Indian History Congress'', vol. 71, (2010-2011). Also in [https://thewire.in/history/after-gandhis-assassination-nehru-saw-the-hindu-right-as-a-threat-to-the-indian-state &quot;After Gandhi's Assassination, Nehru Saw the Hindu Right as a Threat to the Indian State&quot;], ''The Wire'', Jan. 30, 2023.

* Organising the Hindus and helping them is one thing but going in for revenge for its sufferings on innocent and helpless men, women and children is quite another thing…apart from this, their opposition to the Congress, that to of such virulence, disregarding all considerations of personality, decay of decorum, created a kind of unrest among the people. All their speeches were fill of communal poison. It was not necessary to spread poison in order to enthuse the Hindus and organise for their protection. As a final result of the poison, the country had to suffer the sacrifice of the invaluable life of Gandhiji. Even an iota of the sympathy of the Government, or of the people, no more remained for the RSS. In face opposition grew. Opposition turned more severe, when the RSS men expressed joy and distributed sweets after Gandhiji’s death. Under these conditions, it became inevitable for the Government to take action against the RSS…Since then over six months have elapsed. We had hoped that after this lapse of time, with full and proper consideration, the RSS persons would come to the right path. But from the reports that come to me, it is evident that attempts to put fresh life into their same old activities are afoot.
** [[Sardar Patel]], letter to [[Golwalkar]], September 11, 1948. In ''Justice on Trial'', RSS, Bangalore, 1962, pp. 26-28.

* RSS was explicitly influenced by European fascist movements, its leading politicians regularly praised Hitler and Mussolini in the late 1930s and 1940s.
** [[Jason Stanley]], [https://www.google.com/books/edition/How_Fascism_Works/NARIDwAAQBAJ?hl=en&amp;gbpv=0 ''How Fascism Works: The Politics of Us and Them''] (2018), New York: Random House. pp. 14–15.

*“When I read today all the subversive, communal propaganda the media attributes to RSS shakhas, I am frankly baffled. My memories of what happened at our shakha between 6 and 7 p.m. each weekday evening are completely different—we marched about in our khaki shorts, did some yoga, worked out in a traditional outdoor gymnasium with no fancy equipment, sang songs and chanted Sanskrit verses that we did not understand the meanings of, played games and had a bunch of fun with our fellows.”.... “The whole thing was overseen by a team of mostly-well-meaning—if not always inspirational—adults, who truly believed they were helping raise good ‘civilian soldiers’— boys respectful of authority, well-behaved in the presence of adults and well-aware of the importance of physical fitness— who would put their efforts into nation-building when they grew up.” 
**Milind Soman, in his memoir &quot;Made in India&quot;. Quoted from [https://www.opindia.com/2020/03/milind-soman-book-rss-shakha-sanghi-liberal-meltdown/ Liberals suffer meltdown on social media after actor Milind Soman reveals his ‘Sanghi’ background]

* It should be obvious to anybody that the most vicious anti-RSS propaganda is at heart anti Hindu propaganda. So long as the RSS is identified with Hinduism in one form or another, it would invite this attack.... But while the enemies of the RSS have worked themselves up to a frenzied point and have whipped up their tirade, the propaganda itself is losing its appeal with the thinking people....
**Ram Swarup, Hinduism and monotheistic religions (2009)

==See also==
*[[Rajendra Singh]]
*[[H.V. Sheshadri]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Politics of India]]
[[Category:India]]
[[Category:Hindu nationalism]]</text>
      <sha1>5dha2bmjekhjtr7ktme2mck1pqy3mks</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Steven Universe Future</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>222076</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964983</id>
      <parentid>3962568</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:42:44Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39683-94</username>
        <id>3350039</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Bluebird */</comment>
      <origin>3964983</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="57180" sha1="3o6br9etexz9o3widspfa5k8ku2w3iq" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Steven Universe (season 1)|1]] [[Steven Universe (season 2)|2]] [[Steven Universe (season 3)|3]] [[Steven Universe (season 4)|4]] [[Steven Universe (season 5)|5]] | [[Steven Universe: The Movie|Film]] | [[Steven Universe Future|Future]] | [[Steven Universe: Lars of the Stars|Lars of the Stars]] | [[Steven Universe|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Steven Universe Future|Steven Universe Future]]''''' (2019–2020) is an animated limited series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] as an epilogue for [[Steven Universe (season 5)|Season 5]] of ''[[Steven Universe]]'' and ''[[Steven Universe: The Movie]]''.

==Episodes==
===''Little Homeschool''===
:''[Steven is in his bathroom, filling up the tub with warm water, drips a drop from each Diamond aura bottle and his healing spit into the water, turning it into rainbow-colored healing]''
:'''Steven''': ''[grabbing a bubbled gem]'' Happy welcome-back-day. ''[places the bubble in the bathtub and it pops, dunking the gem into the water; Cherry Quartz is reformed from her formerly-corrupted state, and gets startled by her return while stumbling]'' Hello!
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Where am I? Who are you?
:'''Steven''': That used to be a loaded question, but now I can say with confidence that I'm Steven Universe! And you're in my bathroom.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': ''[looks at herself in the mirror]', What happened to me? ''[gasps and grabs the plunger]'' What is this?! ''[points it at Steven]''
:'''Steven''': You were corrupted in a Diamond blast, but you've just been healed! And that is a plunger... ''[they exit the bathroom and into his house]'' Let me fill you in on everything you've missed.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Missed?
:'''Steven''': We have some reading material, available in both English and Gem Glyph. ''[hands her a pair of brochures, titled &quot;You &amp; Your New Horns&quot; and &quot;Era 3 &amp; Me!&quot;]'' Spanish translation forthcoming. ''[they then exit the house towards the Dondai; as Cherry Quartz curls herself in the passenger seat]'' Watch your head. ''[inserts a cassette tape into the music player and begins driving]'' Life is a little different these days. The Diamonds have ended their reign of terror, the intergalactic war is over, and Earth is officially an independent planet. We're all safe to explore our dreams. Lars opened up his own pastry shop, and it's got a real cute space gimmick goin' on. Sadie's been touring with The Suspects, promoting their new album, and Connie has been getting a head start on college prep. She's two years away from applying, but she says it doesn't hurt to start early. And speaking of higher education, Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl and I have been cooking up a dream of our own!
:'''Cherry Quartz''': I have no idea who you're talking about.
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckling]'' Don't worry about it. You'll learn all that, and more, right here at Little Homeschool! ''[gives Cherry Quartz a tour around]'' Here at Little Homeschool, you have a chance to rediscover yourself, and learn to live on Earth if you like. You can forge a new identity. Grow your own ideas. And even find your inner morp.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Wait, what's a morp?
:'''Steven''': That's ''exactly'' the kind of question we love to hear!
:'''Garnet''': ''[teaching various Gems in a yoga class]'' Find your center, your very core. Remember, your body isn't just a projection of light, but also a reflection of your inner soul.
:'''Steven''': ''[standing upside-down]'' Garnet teaches, uhh... All sorts of stuff.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You know, half those Gems are soldiers who fought by your side before they were corrupted and turned into monsters. They're lost and confused and still a little messed up, but they're getting the help they need.
:'''Jasper''': Like all the other Gems you ''use.''
:'''Steven''': ''[frustrated]'' AGGGHHH! I only came here because I felt bad for you, but all of this is your own fault! All the other Gems were corrupted by the Diamonds, but-- but you corrupted yourself just to win a fight! Which you ''LOST!'' To ''ME!'' No one's making you stay here all alone in the middle of nowhere, ready to fight a war that's been over for years! Are you just gonna sit here for centuries waiting for someone to give you a purpose?! ''Because I'm trying to give you one!''
:'''Jasper''': Listen, weakling! You might have Pink Diamond's gem, but you are ''not'' my Diamond, and I am ''not'' going to take orders from some weak, sappy, useless piece of dirt! If you think you're hard enough to tell me what to do, then fight me and prove it.
:'''Steven''': Fine!
:'''Jasper''': ''[suddenly smiles eagerly]'' Really? Huh, well then! Why don't you throw the first punch? ''[beckons tauntingly, and Steven punches her, pushing her back a few feet]'' Ooohh...! ''[laughs aggressively and charges back at him]''
:'''Steven''': I... guess we're doing this.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[During his fight with Jasper, Steven bubbles a nest of baby birds to protect them]''
:'''Jasper''': Stop trying to help those tiny flapping Earthlings, and ''FIGHT ME!'' 
:'''Steven''': I'll never stop trying to help them, or you!
:'''Jasper''': ''[kicking his shield away and pinning him down]'' I don't need your help! ''You're'' the one that needs help! You think you've beaten me, but you've never beaten me on your own! You've always been a fusion! You've always had your friends! Because you're nothing without them! You think everyone needs help!
:'''Steven''': ''[tearing up]'' I-- I just--  
:'''Jasper''': But ''it's only you. No one'' is as '''''pitiful''''' as '''''you!'''''
:''[Shaken and angry, Steven starts to glow pink and pushes Jasper back with a sudden burst of strength, much to her surprise]''
:'''Steven''': ''[looking at himself]'' Whoa... what? ''[Jasper grins, and Steven angrily summons a bubble glove and charges at her with it]'' I'M... ''NOT''... PITIFUL! ''[sends her flying back through several trees]''
:'''Jasper''': ''[chuckles]'' Ha. Not bad. ''[continues to fight Steven, who catches her in the middle of a spin-dash]'' Nice catch.
:'''Steven''': You should see my ''THROW!'' ''[tosses her up into the air, where she laughs as he hits her several more times]'' STOP LAUGHING! ''[sends her slamming back down into the ground, then gasps in shock and returns to normal]'' Jasper...
:'''Jasper''': ''[gets up and shakes herself off, impressed]'' Huh. I didn't think you had it in you.  
:'''Steven''': I don't... I don't know what that was. I'm sorry.  
:'''Jasper''': ''[rolling her eyes]'' Ugh! Don't apologize.  
:'''Steven''': I... think I had you all wrong. Maybe you don't have something to learn from me. Maybe I have something to learn from you. ''[Jasper raises an eyebrow]'' Would you ever be interested in teaching?  
:'''Jasper''': ''[scoffs]'' Tssh! At your crummy little school?
:'''Steven''': No, just me. You brought something out of me I didn't know I had.  
:'''Jasper''': ''[walks up to Steven, placing a hand on his shoulder]'' Consider that fight back there your first and ''only'' lesson. ''[begins walking off]''  
:'''Steven''': Well... can I come back to see you sometime?  
:'''Jasper''': Do what you want.

===''Guidance''===
:'''Steven''': I didn't know Bixbite wanted a career in the culinary arts.
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, we talked a lot about her interests and experiences. Then, I spoke to Kofi and set her up here.
:'''Steven''': This was your idea?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, and she's just the beginning. I wanted to do something big for the school, so I've been pairing Gems up with human jobs. The results have been amazing! I call it: the Gem-Human Excellence Mentorship, or G-H-E-M.
:'''Steven''': Oh, I get it, like GEM.
:'''Amethyst''': No, it's G''H''EM. There's an &quot;H&quot;.
:''[Two Ruby bodyguards appear and stand on guard at the doorway]''
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #1''': All clear, my Mayor.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #2''': All clear.
:''[Mayor Nanefua enters afterward]''
:'''Steven''': You've got Rubies in your program, too?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, and these two are Nanefua's new bodyguards.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Hmm, I don't know about this.
:'''Amethyst''': About what?
:'''Steven''': Ice Gems doing ice stuff, pilot Gems doing pilot stuff, guard Gems doing guard stuff. Isn't this exactly what they were doing on Homeworld?
:'''Amethyst''': ''[chuckles]'' No.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #1''': It's ''just'' like we used to do on Homeworld!
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #2''': Thanks, Amethyst!
:'''Amethyst''': These are the jobs they wanted.
:'''Steven''': Well, sure, they ''think'' they want to do this stuff. But, it's up to us to get them out of their comfort zones.
:'''Amethyst''': I dunno, man. Comfortable can be good too.
:'''Steven''': Bear with me for a sec. ''[to Larimar and Snowflake Obsidian]'' Hey, guys, I was wondering what you two did on Homeworld.
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': I dug ice trenches for their armies.
:'''Larimar''': I made ice sculptures for the Diamonds.
:'''Steven''': So ice is kind of like your default mode?
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': ''[exchanges looks with Larimar]'' Yes.
:'''Steven''': Did you ever think of trying something else?
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': Like filling ice trenches?
:'''Steven''': ''[as he sees Nephrite flying overhead]'' Well, how would you like to fly a plane?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I had an idea for you, Larimar. You could operate the Funland rollercoaster! It's a great job, and you get to help people have fun.
:'''Larimar''': What is this wonderful noise?
:'''Steven''': Those are the joyful screams of people on a rollercoaster.
:'''Larimar''': Human screams are my favorite of the Earth's delights! I want to hear the human screams forever.
:'''Steven''': Okay, that's kind of troubling... but your heart's in the right place.
:'''Larimar''': One day, I'll make ''you'' scream, Steven.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Larimar''': I just wanted to say thanks for the amusement park job. I'm not great at the roller-coaster operation, we know, but I found out I'm good at handing out prizes to children, and I love their laughter.
:'''Steven''': Aww.
:'''Larimar''': It sounds just like screaming.

===''Rose Buds''===
:'''Holly Blue Agate''': Stop relaxing and get back to your posts! Ugh! How can you stand this total lack of order?
:'''Amethyst Guard''': Chill out, Holly Blue. You know you want to.
:'''Holly Blue Agate''' I give up. No one answers to me, and I answer to no one. I'd give anything for an order from the Diamonds, but all they talk about is Steven, Steven, Steven-- ''[sees him]'' Steven!
:'''Steven''': Hi, Holly.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[seeing all of the Rose Quartzes being un-bubbled]'' So... Many... Rose Quartzes. How did the--
:'''Superfan Rose''': Oh, now that it's Era 3, we were all unbubbled, so now, we're making up for lost time. Hi! I'm Rose Quartz, and you, you're Steven! You are so much smaller than I imagined! Is it because you're half organic? Can you believe it, Rose Quartz?!
:'''Hippie Rose''': It's like, we where bubbled, but now we're like, not bubbled.
:'''Steven''': Th-It's really-- It's really great.

===''Volleyball''===
:'''Steven''': So, how would you like your magical spit administered today?
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': ''[with her neck extended and her gem cracked]'' Ah, geez, uh... the ''not'' kissing one?
:'''Steven''': You got it! ''[licks his palm and applies healing spit onto the Ruby's gem, healing the crack]'' Man, what kind of enemies does the mayor have to keep you landing in my office?
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': That's classified information, nurse-citizen Universe.
:'''Steven''': Okay, well, try not to classify too hard out there. Oh, don't forget your lollipop.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': Yeah!
:'''Steven''': Next patient, please. ''[sees five Quartzes entering all with cracked gems and physical deformities]'' Uh… volleyball must have gotten really wild, huh? ''[heals the Quartzes and bids them all farewell]'' Come again! Just, like, not too soon. And remember, volleyball ''isn't'' a contact sport!
:'''Pink Pearl''': Excuse me?
:'''Steven''': Oh, it's you!
:'''Pink Pearl''': I heard you might be able to help me with this. ''[points at her cracked eye]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Hmm, I'm sorry if it's a sore subject, but can you remember anything that happened while you were under White Diamond's control?
:'''Pink Pearl''': Nope! 8,000 years just, blip, gone!
:'''Steven''': So, you must not remember getting this crack in the first place.
:'''Pink Pearl''': Oh, no, no. This is from before.
:'''Steven''': White hurt you before she controlled you?
:'''Pink Pearl''': What? Oh, stars! What a misunderstanding. This is all Pink Diamond.
:'''Steven''': My mom?! ''[tenses up, briefly turning pink, quickly notices, and shakes]'' Sorry! It's just baggage.
:'''Pink Pearl''': Is everything... all right?
:'''Steven''': Yep, but this is not about me! We're gonna get you fixed up, and I know just the Pearl to help us!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[On Pink Pearl's cracked face]''
:'''Pearl''': How could White be so careless?  
:'''Pink Pearl''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, no, Pearl. You've got it all wrong. Pink did this.
:'''Pearl''': ''[shocked]'' What did you say? ''[approaches her]'' 
:'''Steven''': Pearl, no...!  
:'''Pink Pearl''': It's a funny story, really. Once, Pink got tired of asking Yellow and Blue for her own colony, so she went straight to White. Of course, White told her she wasn't fit to run one, and, well, that set her off. 
:'''Pearl''': &quot;Set her off&quot;? What are you talking about?  
:'''Pink Pearl''': You remember how she was, with her destructive powers, throwing tantrums left and right. She had a scream that could crack the walls. She didn't mean to hurt me. ''[chuckles]'' I just happened to be standing too close to her that time, and--  
:'''Steven''': ''[covering his ears anxiously]'' Doesn't matter! I'm gonna fix it!  
:'''Pearl''': Destructive powers?! Pink didn't have destructive powers, she was a healer! She didn't throw tantrums, she kept her feelings secret!
:'''Pink Pearl''': The Pink I knew couldn't keep a secret to save her gem.  
:'''Pearl''': Are you kidding?! If anything, she was ''too'' good at keeping secrets, even from me!
:''[Frustrated by their arguing, Steven furiously snaps and starts glowing pink]''
:'''Steven''': ''[lividly]'' ''STOP IT!'' I CAN'T DEAL WITH ''ONE MORE'' HORRIBLE THING SHE DID, OKAY?! ''[Both Pearls gasp]'' I DON'T WANNA HEAR ABOUT IT, I DON'T EVEN WANNA ''THINK'' ABOUT IT!
:'''Pearl''': Steven!
:'''Steven''': I JUST WANT TO '''''FIX IT!!!'''''
:''[Steven unleashes a shockwave that causes cracks around the room. Pink Pearl cowers in fear, and Steven looks at his own reflection in shock and remorse]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pearl''': I'm sorry for not believing you. It looks like I'm still making excuses for her. 
:'''Pink Pearl''': ''[tearfully]'' Is that what ''I've'' been doing?! But... she didn't mean to! 
:'''Pearl''': But you were hurt! Badly hurt! 
:'''Pink Pearl''': I was badly hurt... How did ''you'' stop hurting? 
:'''Pearl''': ''[embraces her tightly]'' I didn't.
:''[Pink Pearl returns the hug, and they fuse into Mega Pearl]''
:'''Steven''': You fused!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I'm so sorry. The whole trip was for nothing. 
:'''Mega Pearl''': No, it wasn't for nothing. Your mother's Pearls never had the whole picture. One knew your mother was trying to change, but she couldn't understand why. The other never expected her to change at all. Now, I get to understand everything. Now, they finally get to have each other.
:''[She separates into the two Pearls, peacefully holding hands]''

===''Bluebird''===
:''[Greg is in the bathroom, brushing his hair, until Steven and the Gems enter for an emergency meeting]''
:'''Steven''': Don't panic. I think Bluebird is a fusion of Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot;!
:'''Amethyst''': Well, duh.
:'''Garnet''': It's pretty obvious.
:'''Steven''': What?! Well, how come you're all so calm about this?! Did you forget that Aquamarine kidnapped me? How about the fact that &quot;Eyeball&quot; tried to stab me (while we were stuck in space) and ratted me out while I was on trial? They must've fused because they both hate me!
:'''Garnet''': That was them. This is Bluebird.
:'''Steven''': But she pranked me earlier today! She put a sign on my back that said I... smelled good, switched my juice with tomato soup, neatly stack toilet paper... on top of my car?
:'''Pearl''': None of that stuff sounds particularly malicious.
:'''Amethyst''': Besides, don't you like tomato soup?
:'''Steven''': Yeah, but isn't it convenient that Bluebird just showed up here at my house?
:'''Pearl''': Steven, you've literally invited all problematic Gems from across the universe to come here and learn a better way of living.
:'''Steven''': Well, right.
:'''Greg''': Listen, Schtu-ball, if you don't want this Gem around, that's totally fair.
:'''Steven''': No, you guys are right. Everyone deserves a chance to change.
:'''Garnet''': Don't worry. If she tries anything funny, we'll be there to squash her.
:'''Steven''': Thanks, Garnet.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[after Greg breaks free of himself by using &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby's chisel knife to cut off his hair]'' Father, go inside. ''[Greg does so; turns pink, angrily to &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby and Aquamarine]'' I WON'T LET YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Tsk, tsk, tsk. You guys fused just because you hate me, didn't you?
:'''Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': Yes!
:'''Steven''': If that's the only reason, then it's no wonder you can't keep it together.
:'''Aquamarine''': What are you talking about?
:'''Steven''': There are so many other reasons to fuse, like friendship and responsibility and... and love. Imagine how much better it would feel to fuse to support each other, instead of tearing someone down. Your life would fill with warmth and friendship and joy and love and--
:'''&quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': ''[covering her ears; agitated]'' Wowie, wow! He is ''so'' annoying!
:'''Aquamarine''': ''[also agitated]'' I hate him so much!
:'''Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': I know! Me too! ''[they fuse back into Bluebird]''
:'''Steven''': ''[annoyed]'' Are you kidding me?
:'''Bluebird''': At last!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I'm really sorry, Dad. I never should have given Bluebird a chance.
:'''Greg''': I love how you believe in everyone. You stuck to your principles, and I'm proud of you. I mean, everyone can change, but not everyone wants to.

===''A Very Special Episode''===
:''[Rainbow Quartz 2.0 unfuses and Steven answers the call]''
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you're late. I need you for the Sunstone safety Geminar. 
:'''Steven''': ARGH!
:'''Garnet''': Don't worry, ''I'll'' handle the geminar. I'll explain to them every possible future where they get hurt in this house.
:'''Steven''': I don't know if that's a good idea. I'll be right there.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ocean Jasper''': I slip on the stairs?
:'''Garnet''': Yes. You shatter on impact.
:''[Ocean Jasper, Earth and Heaven Beetle, and a Nephrite scream]''
:'''Steven''': ''[enters through the door]'' Garnet, I'm here.
:'''Garnet''': Steven, help. I think I'm scaring them.
:'''Steven''': It's okay. We got this. Let's get this safety Geminar started with a very special guest speaker.
:''[They both dance and fuse into Sunstone]''
:'''Sunstone''': Your rockin' pal Sunstone's here to shine.
:'''Ocean Jasper''': Watch out, Sunstone. It's dangerous in here.
:'''Sunstone''': Not if you practice home safety. Don't slip up. Clear objects off the stairs. Foul shot! Make sure you cover your trash, or you might attract wild animals. Come on. Let's go! Don't leave the water running, it could flood your house. Put protective covers on electrical outlets, especially when kids are around. And most importantly, turn off motion smoothing on your TV.
:'''Ocean Jasper''': Wow, everything looks so much better!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Steven receives a call from Pearl, who he left to take care of Onion]''
:'''Steven''': ''[exhausted]'' Please, please have everything under control...  
:'''Pearl''': STEVEN! EVERYTHING IS OUT OF CONTROL!
:'''Steven''': Yup...
:'''Pearl''': It's getting really weird here! Steven, you were never like this, you were such a good kid! I'm so sorry I never told you that! Aah! I... I can hear him, but I can't see him! I think he's in the walls! I don't know how he got there, and I don't know how to get him out! ''[call ends]''
:'''Steven''': ''[long gasp]'' Garnet, can you handle things on your own for a little bit?  
:'''Garnet''': No problem. Our students love me. ''[walks over to them]'' Let me tell you all the ways you can get hit by a car.  
:'''Steven''': Agh, Garnet! Forget it. I'll stay. I'll stay!  
:'''Pearl''': ''[in another call]'' STEVEN, THERE'S A SNAKE!
:'''Steven''': Never mind!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rainbow Quartz 2.0''': Why play with sharp objects when you can play with my sharp wit? Crack jokes, not cookie jars, as I always say. Ha ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Garnet''': It's important to keep in mind that all these horrible things ''did'' happen to you in alternate timelines. Safety is fun.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Onion has led Garnet's students off a cliff]''
:'''Pearl''': Oh, no!
:'''Garnet''': Steven, quick! Sunstone can save them!
:'''Steven''': Okay... ''[they fuse into Sunstone]'' 
:'''Sunstone''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Pearl''': No! Let Rainbow save them! ''[fuses with Steven]''  
:'''Rainbow Quartz 2.0''': ''[showing his umbrella]'' I'll catch them with this!  
:'''Amethyst''': ''[rushing in]'' Hey, wait! ''I'' need Steven!
:'''Steven''' ''[unfuses from Pearl]'' What is it, Amethyst?  
:'''Amethyst''': I just miss you, man! I haven't seen you for, like, eleven minutes!

===''Snow Day''===
:''[One snowy day, Steven wakes up and starts getting ready for his busy day to run some errands]''
:'''Amethyst''': ''[entering the kitchen with fried eggs for eyes]'' You really gonna skip the most egg-ssential meal of the day?
:'''Steven''': Of course not. I've got all my morning nutrients in this protein shake.
:'''Amethyst''': ''[pokes yolk to leak]'' Dude, you're making me sad.
:'''Garnet''': Steven. I packed everything you're gonna need for today in your cheeseburger backpack.
:'''Steven''': Oh, uh, I don't really use that anymore. Besides, I packed my own bag.
:'''Garnet''': At least pet this cat.
:'''Cat Steven''': ''[popping out of the backpack]'' Meow.
:'''Steven''': Why was I going to need... ''[sighs]'' Never mind. Got to go.
:'''Pearl''': Hold it. According to my weather application, it's going to snow all day and overnight. You're going to freeze if you don't put on a puffer, a hat, and two scarves. Better make it three.
:'''Steven''': ''[muffling in denial]'' Pearl, I need to get going!
:'''Pearl''': But classes don't start for another couple of hours.
:'''Garnet''': Wait for us. We can head over together.
:'''Amethyst''': Why are you taking the old Dondai anyway? We have the warp technology.
:'''Steven''': It's because I've got errands to run in town before classes start.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[after returning home from his errands]'' Hey, guys.
:'''Amethyst''': Guess what we've got lined up tonight. &quot;Pupcopter's Sky-High Adventure&quot;!
:'''Pearl''': Sheet masks with cute animal faces!
:'''Garnet''': And, most importantly, pizza.
:'''Steven''': Guys, I've been a vegetarian for like, a month, and &quot;Pupcopter&quot; is for 6-year-olds, and I have my own skin care routine. Anyways, it's cool. I already ate. ''[walks upstairs]''
:'''Amethyst''': Oh, well. We'll just watch the movie with Cat Steven.
:'''Garnet''': My bad. I was sure we were in the pepperoni timeline.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Man, you had a better work-life balance when the Diamonds were trying to destroy the planet.
:'''Steven''': That was then. This is now.
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, you know what we haven't done in a long time? ''[shapeshifts into 14-year-old Steven]'' Steven Tag!
:'''Steven''': Amethyst, what the heck?!
:'''Amethyst''': You know the rules, buster. You get tagged, you have to turn into Steven.
:'''Steven''': But I'm already Steven!
:'''Amethyst''': Nah, bruh. ''Classic'' Steven.
:'''Steven''': ''Classic Steven?!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pearl''': Steven, what are you doing?
:'''Steven''': Pearl!
:'''Pearl''': Has cabin fever taken hold already?
:'''Steven''': It's Amethyst and Garnet! They're playing Steven Tag to mess with me!
:'''Pearl''': Steven Tag? Wow, that takes me back. Well, I'm sure they… ''[gets tagged by Garnet and falls on her knees to the floor]''
:'''Steven''': Ha! Joke's on you! Pearl doesn't shapeshift! ''[Pearl starts to glow]'' Huh?
:'''Pearl''': ''[shapeshifts into 14-year-old Steven]'' The power of Steven Tag COMPELS ME!
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckles]'' Wow. Good for her.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[shivering]'' They'll never stop until they make me play. ''[Alexandrite, in the form of 14-year-old Steven, appears behind him]'' Oh, jeez. ''[screams as Alexandrite blasts fire at him with her second mouth, but protects himself with his bubble shield]'' I really didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice. I ''JOIN'' THE GAME!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You shouldn't have messed with me. Huh? ''[gets tagged by Sapphire]''
:'''Sapphire''': Tag.
:'''Steven''': ''[falls off the lighthouse]'' Oh, no. Is this the end of my adult life?

===''Why So Blue?''===
:'''Steven''' You're right. This is harder than usual.  
:'''Lapis''': You've just got to force them to stop. This is going to be a fight. They're not nice like me.  
:'''Steven''': Umm...  
:'''Lapis''': Exactly.  
:'''Steven''': They just don't understand that they're doing harm. Y-you get it. What made it click for you?  
:'''Lapis''': ''A cycle of horrible torture.'' ''[smiling]'' But other than that, living in nature, getting creative.
:'''Steven''': Yeah! Come on, we can do that for them.  
:'''Lapis''': Okay. Just a little torture.  
:'''Steven''': N-no, just the other stuff. 
:'''Lapis''': ''[sighs]'' Fine, we'll try it your way.
:''[They head back to the two Lapis Lazulis]'' 
:'''Steven''': Hey, so, why don't we explore the many things that you can do that don't involve destroying worlds?  
:'''&quot;Mean&quot; Lapis''': Should we listen to him?  
:'''&quot;Nice&quot; Lapis''': He ''is'' half-Diamond. Maybe we should half-listen?  
:'''Steven''': I'll take that as a &quot;yes.&quot; Let's go.

===''Little Graduation''===
:'''Lars''': ''[about Shep]'' Say hi to them for me.

===''Prickly Pair''===
:'''Cactus Steven''': I can't tell Pearl how I feel, 'cause she'd blame herself! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cactus Steven''': I can't hear any more high and mighty advice from Garnet! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cactus Steven''': I'm so sick of Amethyst acting like she's so mature now!
:'''Amethyst''': Why's it being so weirdly specific?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, dude?
:'''Pearl''': Is there anything you need to talk about?
:'''Steven''': ''[softly]'' ... I think I've said enough.

===''In Dreams''===
:''[After Steven and Peridot have watched the'' Camp Pining Hearts ''reboot]''
:'''Steven''': Wha…? Wha…?!
:'''Steven and Peridot''': '''''WHAT HAVE THEY DONE?!?!?'''''  
:'''Peridot''': What is with this Rodrigo guy?! He has no charisma!  
:'''Steven''': And can we talk about this cinematography?!  
:'''Peridot''': GAAAH, THEY'VE CHANGED ''ALL'' THE CHARACTERS, AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANY OF THEM! ''[grabs the television]'' HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! ''[sobs] Camp Pining Hearts'' helped me escape when everything around me was in chaos...  
:'''Steven''': ''CPH'' brought us together... 
:'''Peridot''': And now, LOOK AT THIS NIGHTMARE! ''[the TV suddenly shows Steven's dream]'' Steven?! You didn't tell me that they cast you!  
:'''Steven''': What?! They didn't. I-Is this... my dream from last night? ''[on the TV, after Steven falls and the dream ends, it goes back to'' Camp Pining Hearts ''again]'' Whoa! My- My powers must be interfering with the TV signal!  
:'''Peridot''': ''[delighted]'' Steven! Do you know what this means?!  
:'''Steven''': I have to start wearing a tinfoil hat?  
:'''Peridot''': No! It means that if we can put your dreams on the television, we can reboot the reboot!  
:'''Steven''': &quot;Reboot the...?&quot; Peridot, you're a genius!  
:'''Peridot''': I know.
:'''Steven''': And, well, it might be fun to fix something that isn't the entire universe.  
:'''Peridot''': ''[grabs him with one arm]'' This is going to be the beginning of Peridot and Steven Productions!  
:'''Steven''': Yeah-- whoa! ''[topples onto her]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Peridot! We've always had something to fix together - the Cluster, the Diamonds, or Spinel! I don't think I know how to be a friend without something to fix! But I... I just can't do it anymore! I'm so tired... Now I'm even doing it in my dreams! I'm sorry, I can't do this for you. Please don't leave! Don't... leave!
:''[The dream stops, in the manner of a TV turning off; Steven awakens, in tears, to Peridot's concerned voice]''
:'''Peridot''': Steven? Steven! STEVEN! Steven, I saw everything! It's-- It's fine! We don't have to do this anymore. ''[hugs him and starts tearing up]'' I don't care about the show, and I ''definitely'' don't care about Rodrigo! Hrrrgh, I'm such a clod!
:'''Steven''': But I really wanted to spend time with you! I just... wanted an excuse to hang out.
:'''Peridot''': We don't need an excuse to hang out.
:'''Steven''': Can... we still watch ''CPH'' together? Even if it sucks?
:'''Peridot''': ''[removes her visor to wipe her eyes, and smiles]'' Of course.
:''[Later, they watch the show]''
:'''Jasmine''': ''[in the show, angrily]'' How could you lie to me like that, Rodrigo?! I guess you just can't help being a bad person!
:''[Steven and Peridot laugh]''
:'''Peridot''': Jasmine, you just ''buried a body in the woods'', and now you're mad that Rodrigo cheated at ''cards?!''
:''[They laugh again]''
:'''Peridot''': This show is the worst!
:'''Steven''': ''[smiling warmly at her]'' This show is the best.

===''Bismuth Casual''===
:''[At the Starlight Roller Rink]''
:'''Bismuth''': Woooow! So you mean to tell me people pay to have wheels strapped to their feet for fun? That is really something else.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Patricia''': You should have seen Daniel earlier. He was all bent out of shape 'cos his mom tore into him over his last test scores!
:'''Daniel''': ''[groans]'' You know, I kind of forgot about it for a sec.
:'''Steven''': Heh... I know how that is. One time, White Diamond tore into me... literally! ''[laughs awkwardly]'' She, uh, she took my gem - I'm part Gem, by the way - she pulled it right out of my body.
:'''Daniel''': Okay...?
:'''Patricia''': So what grade are you in, Steven?
:'''Steven''': Grade? Err, uh... sixteen?
:'''Patricia''': ''[laughs]''
:'''Daniel''': So you're taking AP classes?
:'''Steven''': Uh...
:'''Connie''': Y'all ready to skate?
:'''Patricia''': Heck, yeah!
:''[Connie, Patricia and Daniel skate away]''
:'''Steven''': I really blew that one. Bet if they were enemy Gems, we'd be best friends by now.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Pearl forms a roll of toilet paper from her gem and gives it to Bismuth]''
:'''Pearl''': Oh, here, take this. Every human has at least one of these in their homes. Sometimes they even use it ''[secretively]'' for vandalism! Good luck out there! ''[starts skating away]''
:'''Bismuth''': Wait, where are you going?
:'''Pearl''': You don't need me anymore, Bismuth - the humans already love you! I'm going to make some new connections of my own! ''[to a random skater]'' Hello, fellow skater! Would you like a fresh roll? ''[forms another roll]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': When Connie and I were fighting to save the universe, things were sort of easier. We were fighting the same fight. Now it's like we're living different lives. I wonder if I'm even her best friend anymore...
:'''Bismuth''': ''[pounds the table firmly]'' How long has this been going on?
:'''Steven''': Err... couple of months.
:'''Bismuth''': Listen, Steven. Pearl brought me here to set me up with her friends, but Connie came here to be with ''you.'' You've got nothing to mope about.
:'''Steven''': But her friends think I'm weird.
:'''Bismuth''': Of course you're weird! You're a Crystal Gem! Connie knows that, she's always known that! That never stopped you from being friends!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Steven collapses in the rink]''
:'''Connie''': Steven! Are you okay?
:'''Steven''': Connie, I'm sorry... I don't wanna hold you back.
:'''Connie''': I don't mind.
:'''Steven''': You've got school, new friends, you're going places and... I'm happy for you. But I feel like you're drifting away from me. I wish we could reconnect, but... BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SKATE!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Steven and Connie win the skating contest as Stevonnie]''
:'''Patricia''': Steven, Connie, that was amazing!
:'''Daniel''': What the heck was that out there?
:'''Connie''': Oh, fusion? Yeah, that's kind of our thing.
:'''Steven''': It's something I picked up from my mom's side of the family.
:'''Daniel''': The only thing I get from my mom's side of the family is ''stressed out.''
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckles]'' Same...

===''Together Forever''===
:''[After Connie turns down Steven's proposal]''
:'''Steven''': I don't get it. Ruby and Sapphire said I should go for it.  
:'''Garnet''': You can't trust love advice from those two hopeless romantics.  
:'''Steven''': Then why didn't you stop me?  
:'''Garnet''': There was no future where you didn't propose to Connie.  
:'''Steven''': Of course...
:'''Garnet''': ''[hugs him]'' Your soulmate is your complement, not your missing piece. Ruby and Sapphire love being together, but they each have their own individual lives. Whatever hole there is in your life, Steven, I want you to understand that Connie-Stevonnie won't be able to fill it.

===''Growing Pains''===
:'''Priyanka''': Steven, do you remember anything bad in your childhood that particularly stuck with you?
:'''Steven''': I guess… I kind of freaked out when they [[w:Gem Glow|cancelled my favorite ice cream]]. And then I got attacked by a giant bug monster. And I got trapped in a bubble and almost drowned. I lost control of my body and turned into a blob of cats. I almost turned so old I died. Amethyst almost died. Pearl [[w:Steven the Sword Fighter|''did'' die]]. Garnet got destabilized right in front of me. I woke up with a black eye, [[w:Jail Break (Steven Universe)|imprisoned on a spaceship]]--
:'''Priyanka''': Steven, this is serious!
:'''Steven''': But that was just the early stuff.
:'''Priyanka''': I think all these experiences have been subjecting your body to a harmful amount of stress, and that's affecting your ability to respond to new forms of stress in a healthy way. You've been dealing with genuine threats from such a young age, your body is now responding to minor threats as if your life were in danger.
:'''Steven''': But, why am I only swelling up now?
:'''Priyanka''': Stress is less harmful when we have people we trust to help us through it. Maybe if... if you're losing your supportive relationships, or if you have a recent experience that was particularly awf--
:''[Steven remembers his failed proposal to Connie, and immediately starts stressing and swelling up]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Greg''': Come on, Steven, talk to me.
:'''Steven''': ''[tearing up]'' I... well... I, um... I proposed to Connie!
:'''Greg''': You what?!
:'''Steven''': She said no.
:'''Greg''': Oh, Steven...
:'''Steven''': My body... it's reacting like it's the end of the world. I think I've seen the world almost end so many times now that ''everything'' that goes wrong feels that... that extreme! I should be feeling so good these days! The Earth is safe, it's Era 3... But I'm swelling up over these third era problems! What do I do? How do I move on from all the stuff I've been through? How do I live life if it always feels like I'm about to die?!
:'''Greg''': It's gonna be all right, Stewball. I'm here for you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I guess I thought I could just follow Connie to college, like if we got married I'd know what to do with myself. But I'm the one that's gotta figure that stuff out.
:'''Greg''': Cut yourself some slack! It's okay to be worried and make some mistakes when you're figuring out what to do with your life. That's not unusual. Uh, well, the magic swelling is a little unusual, but that's okay too! If you want to be a giant boy, we can use the car wash as a shower.

=== ''Mr. Universe'' ===
:'''Steven''': I don't need this song! I need...I need what you had!
:'''Greg''': What?
:'''Steven''': I wish I could've grown up at a house like that.
:'''Greg''': No you don't!
:'''Steven''': Maybe your parents weren't so bad. Maybe they gave you curfews and chaperones and meatloaf f-for a reason!
:'''Greg''': Steven, you don't know what they were like!
:'''Steven''': They can't be worse then mom's family. I went halfway across the galaxy for them, and this was right here?!
:'''Greg''': Steven, I couldn't do anything growing up. Everything I liked, or wore, wanted was always wrong! Trust me, you're better off then I was.
:'''Steven''': I can't believe I never realized, you're... you're just like Mom! ''[turns pink as his grip tightens on the steering wheel]''
:'''Greg''': You grew up with actual freedom!
:'''Steven''': I grew up in a ''van!'' I never went to school! I've never been to the doctor until two days ago!
:'''Greg''': Steven! You're a gem! You're not like other kids!
:'''Steven''': I could have done all that stuff! My problem isn't that I'm a gem, my problem is that I'm a ''UNIVERSE!!''

===''Fragments''===
:'''Pearl''': How could this happen? You crashed the van with Greg inside? You know how fragile he is, these pink outbursts of yours are getting out of hand.
:'''Steven''': It's not an ''OUTBURST! [turns pink and swells up]''
:'''Pearl''': See? This is exactly what I'm talking about! What's happening to you?
:'''Steven''': Nothing! ...It's nothing.
:'''Pearl''': S-Steven! Where are you going?! We're not pro- ''[Steven summons out a generated force field]'' Steven! Drop this wall!
:'''Steven''': Pearl, sorry. I'm trying- I just… need… some space, OK? I'll be in my room.
:'''Amethyst''': Not so fast, my dude. You gotta tell us what's going on.
:'''Garnet''': It looks like Steven is trying to avoid a serious discussion about this ''all'' together.
:'''Steven''': '''NO, I'M''' &lt;big&gt;'''NOT!!!'''&lt;/big&gt; ''[slams his fist into the stairs in rage, unleashing a room-wrecking shockwave]''
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you have got to calm down and talk to us!
:'''Amethyst''': Just chill, man!
:'''Steven''': Nnghh…
:'''Pearl''': We need to do something about this before someone gets hurt!
:'''Steven''': NNGGHH…
:'''Garnet''': Don't let this power control you. You're better than this.
:'''Steven''': NNGGHH… &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[notices the Gems are walking in slow-motion]'' I'm…speeding up again. I gotta get out of here.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': This thing with my powers is a real problem!
:'''Jasper''': The only problem you have are your friends.
:'''Steven''': Huh?
:'''Jasper''': Can't you see they're holding you back?
:'''Steven''': What? No, they're-- they're just worried about me.
:'''Jasper''': They're afraid. Of your power.
:'''Steven''': Yeah... yeah, I guess so...
:'''Jasper''': You are too. You came all the way out here to hide from it. But ''I'm'' not here to hide. I don't stifle my anger or my power; I channel it into training!
:'''Steven''': Oh, right... this destroyed forest.
:'''Jasper''': I've got no one to serve, nowhere to go. All I have left is '''''POWER!''' [she punches a tree, completely smashing it apart]'' And in order to control that power, I have to ''use'' it. Those so-called &quot;friends&quot; of yours don't understand. They want you to feel bad for being yourself.
:'''Steven''': I ''do'' feel bad… ''[steps over to another tree and punches it, cringing in pain and remorse]''
:'''Jasper''': YEAH, DESTROY THAT WEAKLING TREE!
:'''Steven''': No! ''[kisses the tree, healing it and making grass sprout around it]''
:'''Jasper''': Ugh! Gross! That's disgusting! Bleh! No! The grass! ''[tears at it]'' Get outta here! ''[grabs Steven]'' Quit helping the local ecosystem recover!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[On Steven's new, more muscular form]''
:'''Jasper''': Hm. Not bad for three days of work. ''[Steven kisses one of his biceps]'' I didn't teach you that…

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jasper''': What are you holding back for?! You think I can't take it? I'm not gonna coddle you, Steven! Do you wanna go home to your Gems?
:'''Steven''': No…
:'''Jasper''': Are you afraid to be strong? Are you pathetic? Are you ''weak?''
:'''Steven''': &lt;big&gt;'''''I'M NOT!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You're right, Jasper… I ''have'' been holding back.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Having shattered Jasper after losing control in their rematch, Steven hurries back to his bathroom and dips the fragments into Diamond aura potions]''
:'''Steven''': Please, please let this work! ''[crying]'' Jasper, I'm sorry. Please… come back. ''[his tears add Pink's aura to the mix]'' Please…
:''[After a while, Jasper's gem glows and heals, and she reforms]''
:'''Jasper''': ''[panting]'' Huh? What? You... ''shattered'' me?
:'''Steven''': Jasper! I-I'm so sorry, I should have stopped! I-I just wasn't thinking!  
:'''Jasper''': ''[steps out of the bathtub and bows on one knee]'' I bow to your strength… ''my Diamond.''  
:'''Steven''': ''[horrified]'' No...!

===''Homeworld Bound''===
:'''Pearl''': ''[knocks on the bathroom door]'' Steven?
:'''Amethyst''': What's going on in there? ''[Jasper emerges]'' Jasper?!
:'''Pearl''': What are you-?
:'''Amethyst''': Where's Steven?!
:'''Jasper''': Right here. ''[steps aside, revealing him looking scared and depressed]''
:'''Amethyst''': Steven? Where have you been?!
:''[Steven walks off upstairs to his conservatory]''
:'''Pearl''': You can't just disappear for days without telling us!
:'''Jasper''': My Diamond can do as he pleases.
:'''Amethyst''': Wait, what?!
:'''Pearl''': Why are you calling him that?!
:'''Garnet''': Steven!
:'''Pearl''': Where is he going?!
:''[The Gems follow Steven to his conservatory]''
:'''Pearl''': Steven, wait!
:'''Garnet''': You don't need to go.
:''[Steven turns pink and puts a barrier in front of the Gems and Jasper as he sighs]''
:'''Amethyst''': What the HECK?!
:'''Steven''': You guys… I love you, but you ''can't'' help me anymore. I've been avoiding the only people in the entire universe who can. Please, don't follow me. You too, Jasper. Find something better to do with your life.
:'''Garnet''': Steven! Remember, we'll always be your family.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spinel''': STEVEN! ''[grabs him and kisses him]''
:'''Steven''': ''[turning pink]'' Spinel, what is wrong with you?!
:'''Spinel''': Oh, y'know, the usual.
:'''Steven''': ''[turning back to normal]'' So, how've you been since, err...?
:'''Spinel''': Since I tried to kill you? That was so embarrassing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[controlling White Diamond]'' Whoa. This is… so weird. I'm-I'm, I'm a Diamond. This- This is the last thing I needed to see! ''[angrily]'' I don't wanna be you! I don't wanna be anything like you! Why won't you just go '''AWAY?!''' ''[punches a pillar]'' Don't hurt me! She can't hurt me. I'm controlling her. So why am I so afraid? ''[remembers the memory of White pulling his gemstone out of his navel; scowls darkly] '''She's''''' the one who should be afraid.
:'''White Diamond''': ''[talking in Steven's voice]'' What's- what's going on? ''[Steven starts controlling her like a puppet]'' What? No, stop it. I don't like this!
:'''Steven''': Too bad. ''[force controls her by walking her to a pillar]''
:'''White Diamond''': Let me go! ''[grabs hold of the pillar]'' Please! You're scaring me!
:'''Steven''': This is for '''''everything''''' you put me through! ''[forces White Diamond to slam her head into the pillar, in an attempt to shatter her gemstone, instead, snaps them out of it and hits his own head, allowing White Diamond to regain her control again]''
:'''White Diamond''': ''[breathing; horrified]'' What… what ''was'' that?!
:'''Steven''': I-I don't know.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spinel''': Hey, buddy, where you going?
:'''Steven''': Wait a second - ''you'' used to have vengeful thoughts!
:'''Spinel''': ''[awkwardly]'' Ooooh, yeah... but I don't get 'em anymore.
:'''Steven''': How did you make them stop?
:'''Spinel''': I met a little someone named Steven Universe! And he told me: ''[singing]'' [[w:Steven Universe: The Movie|I–I–I–I–I–I, I can make a chaaaaange! You can make a promise...]]
:'''Steven''': Gah! Don't give me my own advice!

===''Everything's Fine''===
:'''Steven''': Hey, Connie, what's up?
:'''Connie''': Steven! Good, you finally picked up! I can't believe we haven't spoken since the hospital. How are you?
:'''Steven''': I'm great! Never been better!
:'''Connie''': Really? Have you had any more issues with swelling and glowing pink?
:'''Steven''': Um... Nope? Well, maybe, but how about you? How's college prep?
:'''Connie''': Steven, that's, uh- It's fine, but what do you mean, maybe?
:'''Steven''': Look, there's nothing to worry about. I'm OK.
:'''Connie''': Steven...
:'''Steven''': I should go. I don't wanna wake up the Gems.
:'''Connie''': But they don't even sleep!
:'''Steven''': Uh, bye!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[While trying to help in Bismuth's workshop]''
:'''Steven''': Ooh, look at that. Now you have ''two'' anvils.
:'''Bismuth''': Noooo! My anvil! My beautiful anvil!
:'''Steven''': Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, my work here is done. Well, toodles!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Connie''': Steven!
:'''Steven''': Huh?
:'''Connie''': I knew it! You ''are'' swelling and glowing again. I've been trying to call you, but I came as soon as I saw this. ''[holds out her phone, on which Steven, glowing and swelled up, is doing the plant Steven's dance and looping the message &quot;Steven's here to help!&quot;]'' What is going on?
:'''Steven''': I... broadcast my subconscious sometimes these days. It's really no big deal.
:'''Connie''': Okay, but... I can tell something is bothering you. ''[holds out her phone again; the message makes some statics]''
:'''Steven''': Ah, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine! Awesome, in fact. Come on, you've seen me when I wasn't doing well.
:'''Greg''': Steven, if being like this is what you want, then we'll support you one hundred percent. Whatever makes you happy. But, if you're not happy, if something's wrong-
:'''Steven''': Nothing's wrong! Besides, I don't want you to worry.
:'''Connie''': We ''are'' worried!
:'''Greg''': Steven, you know you can tell us anything.
:'''Steven''': It's not that easy! You know what? I don't have to deal with this! ''[walks towards the door, but Amethyst, Pearl, and Connie block his way]''
:'''Amethyst''': Hold up, dude.
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you need to stop running.
:'''Greg''': Please.
:''[Steven starts groaning in frustration, his head briefly swelling out of shape]''
:'''Connie''': Steven, we should get you back to the hospital.
:'''Amethyst and Pearl''': HOSPITAL?!
:'''Pearl''': When were you in the hospital?!
:'''Connie''': You didn't tell them?!
:'''Steven''': 	''[becoming hysterical, starting to laugh uneasily]'' It wasn't that important, you guys! You're making a big deal out of nothing. Have I done some things wrong? Sure! I trashed the house today, I broke an anvil - what teenager hasn't? Dad and I had a little disagreement, but that's practically a rite of passage! I mean, it would be weird if we didn't, right? And ''maybe'' I've had a not-so-nice thought or two about, like, you know, slamming White Diamond's head through a pillar, but it's not like I actually went through with it! I only ''actually'' shattered Jasper!
:''[Pearl gasps in horrified shock]''
:'''Amethyst''': WHAT?!
:''[Garnet, Connie, and Greg all gasp in horror]''
:'''Connie''': You're- you're joking, right?
:'''Steven''': Oh, don't worry! I fixed that too! I can fix ''anything!'' I can just keep messing up and fixing things forever, and you'll never have to know or think about any of it!
:'''Garnet''': Steven...
:'''Steven''': ''[sighs; finally loses it]'' How messed up is that? That I've gotten away with this for so long? You have ''no'' idea how bad I am! Y-You think I'm so great, and I'm so mature, and I always know what to do! But ''that's'' not true! I haven't learned a thing from my problems! They've all just made me worse! You all think of me as some angel, but I'm not that kid anymore! ''[scowls]'' I'm a fraud. ''[falls to the floor; breathing shakily]'' I'm a fraud. I'm a MONSTER! ''[massive pink spikes burst out of his back, tearing his shirt with everyone taking  a step back, with plain terror]''

===''I Am My Monster''===
:'''Greg''': ''[calling out]'' Just calm down, son! Take deep breaths! Deep breaths!
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah! Relax, buddy!
:'''Peridot''': Let's hurry up and clobber that thing!
:'''Garnet''': Stand down.
:'''Peridot''': What for?!
:'''Lapis''': Where's Steven?
:'''Garnet''': That ''is'' Steven.
:'''Peridot, Bismuth &amp; Lapis''': ''[shocked]'' WHAT?!
:''[Monster Steven bashes his head against the cliff of the temple, causing an avalanche of boulders to fall]''
:'''Garnet''': RUN!
:'''Amethyst''': He's not listening to us at all!
:'''Pearl''': What happened to him? First, he says he's a shatterer and then he's turned into this...''thing''!
:'''Connie''': We can change him back, can't we?
:'''Garnet''': As long as he believes he's a monster, he'll ''stay'' one.
:'''Bismuth''': We gotta keep him away from the town!
:'''Garnet''': Connie, do what you can to protect the townspeople.
:'''Connie''': Right!
:'''Garnet''': ''[to Bismuth, Lapis, and Peridot]'' You three, joint him into the ocean and hold him there. Let's go, guys. ''[she, Amethyst, and Pearl fuse into Alexandrite]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Spinel and the Diamonds arrive in their ship]''
:'''Spinel''': ''[emerging, holding Steven's flip flop he left behind on Homeworld]'' You forgot your foot thong thingy! ''[sees Monster Steven]'' OOOH, OH!
:''[The Diamonds walk out of the ship]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': What is going on here?
:'''White Diamond''': Why is something like this ''always'' happening when we show up for a visit?
:'''Blue Diamond''': What is that thing?
:'''Garnet''': That &quot;thing&quot; is Steven.
:''[Blue Diamond, White Diamond, and Spinel all gasp in shock]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': What?!
:'''White Diamond''': Impossible!
:'''Blue Diamond''': Is he corrupted?
:'''Yellow Diamond''': But how?
:'''Garnet''': Never mind that. We have to change him back.
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Leave it to me. ''[she catches Monster Steven's head in an energy aura and tries to shrink it down, only for it to revert back immediately, to her confusion]'' With my new power, I should be able to alter his physical form.
:'''Blue Diamond''': He's resisting. Maybe he needs to feel better first. I can help with that. ''[she sends a cloud of joy towards Monster Steven, but he blows it right back]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Look out! ''[the cloud hits her and Spinel, and they start laughing uncontrollably]'' Wow! Your new power didn't work either!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[pushes Yellow and Blue aside and approaches Monster Steven]'' Enough. I know exactly how to help. If I connect with him and he speaks through me, maybe we'll understand what he's going through. Now then, do you hear me, Steven? ''[her gem glows and the atmosphere's colors change]'' Just relax and let me in… Wait-- ''[her eyes glow, and she cries out and falls back as Yellow and Blue catch her]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': White!
:'''Blue Diamond''': What happened?!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[horrified]'' That's ''not'' Steven anymore!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Guys, look! The Cluster is trying to hold Steven back!
:'''Peridot''': I can't believe it! He's even stronger than the Cluster!
:'''Bismuth''': Don't let your guard down. He could break free at any moment!
:'''Pearl''': Deep inside this…monster, Steven must be in there, so angry.
:'''Amethyst''': I knew something was going on. I- Why didn't I ''do'' something?!
:'''Sapphire''': ''[crying]'' If we don't get through to him, he'll stay like this ''forever!'' ''[starts sobbing along with Ruby while Lapis watches]''
:'''Amethyst''': ''[to Greg as he takes a few steps back]'' Dude, you should get outta here before you get hurt!
:'''Greg''': ''[stomps his foot]'' NO! Everytime Gem stuff happens, I run the other way! This is ''my'' son! And he's right to be angry, because I didn't protect him!
:'''Blue Diamond''': ''[tearing up; crying]'' You didn't protect him from us! He's like this because of us!
:'''Yellow Diamond''': ''[crying]'' ''We're'' the source of Steven's suffering!
:'''Spinel''': ''[breaks down, sobbing hysterically and blowing her nose into her pigtails]'' THIS IS ''MY'' FAULT!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[crying]'' Spinel, don't be silly. Everyone knows that all of this is because of ''me!''
:'''Spinel''': No, it's ME! I tried to wipe his friends' memories, so he would die alone on a barren world!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[sobbing sorrowfully]'' That was because you were angry with Pink! And if Pink hurt you, it was because ''I'' hurt ''her!'' Like I hurt Yellow and Blue and Steven and everyone in the entire universe! This is all ''my'' fault!
:'''Connie''': YES, it is! ''[rides in on Lion]'' Yes, you hurt him, but this isn't the time to make this all about you! That is not helping! Maybe Steven would care how sad you are, because he always puts everyone else's feelings first! But he can't do that for you right now, because he needs ''us'' this time! We all have Steven when we needed him. But the only person who's never had Steven is Steven! He's ''always'' been there for us, so… how can we be there for him now?
:''[Ruby and Sapphire smile and fuse back into Garnet]''
:'''Garnet''': I know how. ''[Monster Steven breaks free of the Cluster's hand, defeating it and charges at the beach]'' Okay! No time to waste. Yellow, make me as big as him!
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Right.
:'''Garnet''': Blue, lift everyone up!
:'''Blue Diamond''': Of course.
:'''Garnet''': Everyone, get in line!
:'''Greg''': You got it!
:'''Garnet''': It's time to show Steven… some love.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Garnet''': ''[hugging her arms tightly around Monster Steven while he struggles; calmly]'' Steven, when I fell apart, you were there for me. I want to be there for ''you'' now. I'm here, Steven. I'm here.
:'''Lapis''': This is working? You hear us? Steven! ''[comes and hugs him]''
:''[Everyone comes in for the hug too]''
:'''Greg''': I'm here, Schtu-Ball! Whatever you need, I'll make it happen! You hear me?!
:'''Peridot''': Steven, you never gave up on me for some reason I don't understand! I'll do the same for you!
:'''Amethyst''': I know you feel bad! Believe me, I get it! Sometimes it feels like you're never gonna like yourself but… it's possible, man!
:'''Pearl''': Steven, I know how awful it feels to keep a part of yourself secret! You shouldn't have to hide anything from me!
:''[Monster Steven stammers emotionally, and the Cluster's hand reappears and takes his]''
:'''Connie''': ''[jumps off Lion's head before landing on Monster Steven's nose and hugs his face; sighs]'' Steven… you must have been ''so'' afraid to show us this side of yourself, but we're not going anywhere. We're all gonna take care of you the same way you took care of us. You know what? I don't have your powers, but… ''[kisses him with a pink droplet appearing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[wakes up, back to his normal human-self, still crying]'' Huh? ''[looks and sees everyone smiling at him]'' Wha…I… Did-Did I-I'm- ''[Lion pops up and licks him; chuckling]'' Lion. ''[hugs Lion]'' Lion! ''[begins sobbing, letting out his emotions]''

===''The Future''===
:'''Jasper''': ''[bursts through the wall, staying aloof]'' Heard you're leaving. ''[faces at Steven]'' I'm coming with you!
:'''Steven''': Jasper, I'm going ''alone.''
:'''Jasper''': Then who will protect you?!
:'''Steven''': I can protect myself.
:'''Jasper''': ''[sighs disappointedly, scowls]'' I know. ''[punches a hole in the ground and looks the opposite direction]'' Farewell, my Diamond. ''[headbutts the wall, creating another Jasper-shaped hole next to the previous one, walks through it]''
:'''Steven''': Whoa! Even Jasper's more upset than my own family! Maybe I need a round two?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Garnet''': I couldn't resist looking into your future. I peeked, and I saw a possibility that our tears would keep you from leaving. But I also saw many paths ahead of you, and we are a part of ''all'' of them. Wherever you end up, we will visit you to talk, to listen, to be there – whenever you need us. We love you, Steven.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:Steven Universe]]</text>
      <sha1>3o6br9etexz9o3widspfa5k8ku2w3iq</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965049</id>
      <parentid>3964983</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:54:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39683-94</username>
        <id>3350039</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Little Homeschool */</comment>
      <origin>3965049</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="57180" sha1="khu9y7txcbdq5eeuyrybmb26vafaoh9" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Steven Universe (season 1)|1]] [[Steven Universe (season 2)|2]] [[Steven Universe (season 3)|3]] [[Steven Universe (season 4)|4]] [[Steven Universe (season 5)|5]] | [[Steven Universe: The Movie|Film]] | [[Steven Universe Future|Future]] | [[Steven Universe: Lars of the Stars|Lars of the Stars]] | [[Steven Universe|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Steven Universe Future|Steven Universe Future]]''''' (2019–2020) is an animated limited series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] as an epilogue for [[Steven Universe (season 5)|Season 5]] of ''[[Steven Universe]]'' and ''[[Steven Universe: The Movie]]''.

==Episodes==
===''Little Homeschool''===
:''[Steven is in his bathroom, filling up the tub with warm water, drips a drop from each Diamond aura bottle and his healing spit into the water, turning it into rainbow-colored healing]''
:'''Steven''': ''[grabbing a bubbled gem]'' Happy welcome-back-day. ''[places the bubble in the bathtub and it pops, dunking the gem into the water; Cherry Quartz is reformed from her formerly-corrupted state, and gets startled by her return while stumbling]'' Hello!
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Where am I? Who are you?
:'''Steven''': That used to be a loaded question, but now I can say with confidence that I'm Steven Universe! And you're in my bathroom.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': ''[looks at herself in the mirror]'' What happened to me? ''[gasps and grabs the plunger]'' What is this?! ''[points it at Steven]''
:'''Steven''': You were corrupted in a Diamond blast, but you've just been healed! And that is a plunger... ''[they exit the bathroom and into his house]'' Let me fill you in on everything you've missed.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Missed?
:'''Steven''': We have some reading material, available in both English and Gem Glyph. ''[hands her a pair of brochures, titled &quot;You &amp; Your New Horns&quot; and &quot;Era 3 &amp; Me!&quot;]'' Spanish translation forthcoming. ''[they then exit the house towards the Dondai; as Cherry Quartz curls herself in the passenger seat]'' Watch your head. ''[inserts a cassette tape into the music player and begins driving]'' Life is a little different these days. The Diamonds have ended their reign of terror, the intergalactic war is over, and Earth is officially an independent planet. We're all safe to explore our dreams. Lars opened up his own pastry shop, and it's got a real cute space gimmick goin' on. Sadie's been touring with The Suspects, promoting their new album, and Connie has been getting a head start on college prep. She's two years away from applying, but she says it doesn't hurt to start early. And speaking of higher education, Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl and I have been cooking up a dream of our own!
:'''Cherry Quartz''': I have no idea who you're talking about.
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckling]'' Don't worry about it. You'll learn all that, and more, right here at Little Homeschool! ''[gives Cherry Quartz a tour around]'' Here at Little Homeschool, you have a chance to rediscover yourself, and learn to live on Earth if you like. You can forge a new identity. Grow your own ideas. And even find your inner morp.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Wait, what's a morp?
:'''Steven''': That's ''exactly'' the kind of question we love to hear!
:'''Garnet''': ''[teaching various Gems in a yoga class]'' Find your center, your very core. Remember, your body isn't just a projection of light, but also a reflection of your inner soul.
:'''Steven''': ''[standing upside-down]'' Garnet teaches, uhh... All sorts of stuff.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You know, half those Gems are soldiers who fought by your side before they were corrupted and turned into monsters. They're lost and confused and still a little messed up, but they're getting the help they need.
:'''Jasper''': Like all the other Gems you ''use.''
:'''Steven''': ''[frustrated]'' AGGGHHH! I only came here because I felt bad for you, but all of this is your own fault! All the other Gems were corrupted by the Diamonds, but-- but you corrupted yourself just to win a fight! Which you ''LOST!'' To ''ME!'' No one's making you stay here all alone in the middle of nowhere, ready to fight a war that's been over for years! Are you just gonna sit here for centuries waiting for someone to give you a purpose?! ''Because I'm trying to give you one!''
:'''Jasper''': Listen, weakling! You might have Pink Diamond's gem, but you are ''not'' my Diamond, and I am ''not'' going to take orders from some weak, sappy, useless piece of dirt! If you think you're hard enough to tell me what to do, then fight me and prove it.
:'''Steven''': Fine!
:'''Jasper''': ''[suddenly smiles eagerly]'' Really? Huh, well then! Why don't you throw the first punch? ''[beckons tauntingly, and Steven punches her, pushing her back a few feet]'' Ooohh...! ''[laughs aggressively and charges back at him]''
:'''Steven''': I... guess we're doing this.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[During his fight with Jasper, Steven bubbles a nest of baby birds to protect them]''
:'''Jasper''': Stop trying to help those tiny flapping Earthlings, and ''FIGHT ME!'' 
:'''Steven''': I'll never stop trying to help them, or you!
:'''Jasper''': ''[kicking his shield away and pinning him down]'' I don't need your help! ''You're'' the one that needs help! You think you've beaten me, but you've never beaten me on your own! You've always been a fusion! You've always had your friends! Because you're nothing without them! You think everyone needs help!
:'''Steven''': ''[tearing up]'' I-- I just--  
:'''Jasper''': But ''it's only you. No one'' is as '''''pitiful''''' as '''''you!'''''
:''[Shaken and angry, Steven starts to glow pink and pushes Jasper back with a sudden burst of strength, much to her surprise]''
:'''Steven''': ''[looking at himself]'' Whoa... what? ''[Jasper grins, and Steven angrily summons a bubble glove and charges at her with it]'' I'M... ''NOT''... PITIFUL! ''[sends her flying back through several trees]''
:'''Jasper''': ''[chuckles]'' Ha. Not bad. ''[continues to fight Steven, who catches her in the middle of a spin-dash]'' Nice catch.
:'''Steven''': You should see my ''THROW!'' ''[tosses her up into the air, where she laughs as he hits her several more times]'' STOP LAUGHING! ''[sends her slamming back down into the ground, then gasps in shock and returns to normal]'' Jasper...
:'''Jasper''': ''[gets up and shakes herself off, impressed]'' Huh. I didn't think you had it in you.  
:'''Steven''': I don't... I don't know what that was. I'm sorry.  
:'''Jasper''': ''[rolling her eyes]'' Ugh! Don't apologize.  
:'''Steven''': I... think I had you all wrong. Maybe you don't have something to learn from me. Maybe I have something to learn from you. ''[Jasper raises an eyebrow]'' Would you ever be interested in teaching?  
:'''Jasper''': ''[scoffs]'' Tssh! At your crummy little school?
:'''Steven''': No, just me. You brought something out of me I didn't know I had.  
:'''Jasper''': ''[walks up to Steven, placing a hand on his shoulder]'' Consider that fight back there your first and ''only'' lesson. ''[begins walking off]''  
:'''Steven''': Well... can I come back to see you sometime?  
:'''Jasper''': Do what you want.

===''Guidance''===
:'''Steven''': I didn't know Bixbite wanted a career in the culinary arts.
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, we talked a lot about her interests and experiences. Then, I spoke to Kofi and set her up here.
:'''Steven''': This was your idea?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, and she's just the beginning. I wanted to do something big for the school, so I've been pairing Gems up with human jobs. The results have been amazing! I call it: the Gem-Human Excellence Mentorship, or G-H-E-M.
:'''Steven''': Oh, I get it, like GEM.
:'''Amethyst''': No, it's G''H''EM. There's an &quot;H&quot;.
:''[Two Ruby bodyguards appear and stand on guard at the doorway]''
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #1''': All clear, my Mayor.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #2''': All clear.
:''[Mayor Nanefua enters afterward]''
:'''Steven''': You've got Rubies in your program, too?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, and these two are Nanefua's new bodyguards.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Hmm, I don't know about this.
:'''Amethyst''': About what?
:'''Steven''': Ice Gems doing ice stuff, pilot Gems doing pilot stuff, guard Gems doing guard stuff. Isn't this exactly what they were doing on Homeworld?
:'''Amethyst''': ''[chuckles]'' No.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #1''': It's ''just'' like we used to do on Homeworld!
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #2''': Thanks, Amethyst!
:'''Amethyst''': These are the jobs they wanted.
:'''Steven''': Well, sure, they ''think'' they want to do this stuff. But, it's up to us to get them out of their comfort zones.
:'''Amethyst''': I dunno, man. Comfortable can be good too.
:'''Steven''': Bear with me for a sec. ''[to Larimar and Snowflake Obsidian]'' Hey, guys, I was wondering what you two did on Homeworld.
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': I dug ice trenches for their armies.
:'''Larimar''': I made ice sculptures for the Diamonds.
:'''Steven''': So ice is kind of like your default mode?
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': ''[exchanges looks with Larimar]'' Yes.
:'''Steven''': Did you ever think of trying something else?
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': Like filling ice trenches?
:'''Steven''': ''[as he sees Nephrite flying overhead]'' Well, how would you like to fly a plane?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I had an idea for you, Larimar. You could operate the Funland rollercoaster! It's a great job, and you get to help people have fun.
:'''Larimar''': What is this wonderful noise?
:'''Steven''': Those are the joyful screams of people on a rollercoaster.
:'''Larimar''': Human screams are my favorite of the Earth's delights! I want to hear the human screams forever.
:'''Steven''': Okay, that's kind of troubling... but your heart's in the right place.
:'''Larimar''': One day, I'll make ''you'' scream, Steven.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Larimar''': I just wanted to say thanks for the amusement park job. I'm not great at the roller-coaster operation, we know, but I found out I'm good at handing out prizes to children, and I love their laughter.
:'''Steven''': Aww.
:'''Larimar''': It sounds just like screaming.

===''Rose Buds''===
:'''Holly Blue Agate''': Stop relaxing and get back to your posts! Ugh! How can you stand this total lack of order?
:'''Amethyst Guard''': Chill out, Holly Blue. You know you want to.
:'''Holly Blue Agate''' I give up. No one answers to me, and I answer to no one. I'd give anything for an order from the Diamonds, but all they talk about is Steven, Steven, Steven-- ''[sees him]'' Steven!
:'''Steven''': Hi, Holly.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[seeing all of the Rose Quartzes being un-bubbled]'' So... Many... Rose Quartzes. How did the--
:'''Superfan Rose''': Oh, now that it's Era 3, we were all unbubbled, so now, we're making up for lost time. Hi! I'm Rose Quartz, and you, you're Steven! You are so much smaller than I imagined! Is it because you're half organic? Can you believe it, Rose Quartz?!
:'''Hippie Rose''': It's like, we where bubbled, but now we're like, not bubbled.
:'''Steven''': Th-It's really-- It's really great.

===''Volleyball''===
:'''Steven''': So, how would you like your magical spit administered today?
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': ''[with her neck extended and her gem cracked]'' Ah, geez, uh... the ''not'' kissing one?
:'''Steven''': You got it! ''[licks his palm and applies healing spit onto the Ruby's gem, healing the crack]'' Man, what kind of enemies does the mayor have to keep you landing in my office?
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': That's classified information, nurse-citizen Universe.
:'''Steven''': Okay, well, try not to classify too hard out there. Oh, don't forget your lollipop.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': Yeah!
:'''Steven''': Next patient, please. ''[sees five Quartzes entering all with cracked gems and physical deformities]'' Uh… volleyball must have gotten really wild, huh? ''[heals the Quartzes and bids them all farewell]'' Come again! Just, like, not too soon. And remember, volleyball ''isn't'' a contact sport!
:'''Pink Pearl''': Excuse me?
:'''Steven''': Oh, it's you!
:'''Pink Pearl''': I heard you might be able to help me with this. ''[points at her cracked eye]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Hmm, I'm sorry if it's a sore subject, but can you remember anything that happened while you were under White Diamond's control?
:'''Pink Pearl''': Nope! 8,000 years just, blip, gone!
:'''Steven''': So, you must not remember getting this crack in the first place.
:'''Pink Pearl''': Oh, no, no. This is from before.
:'''Steven''': White hurt you before she controlled you?
:'''Pink Pearl''': What? Oh, stars! What a misunderstanding. This is all Pink Diamond.
:'''Steven''': My mom?! ''[tenses up, briefly turning pink, quickly notices, and shakes]'' Sorry! It's just baggage.
:'''Pink Pearl''': Is everything... all right?
:'''Steven''': Yep, but this is not about me! We're gonna get you fixed up, and I know just the Pearl to help us!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[On Pink Pearl's cracked face]''
:'''Pearl''': How could White be so careless?  
:'''Pink Pearl''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, no, Pearl. You've got it all wrong. Pink did this.
:'''Pearl''': ''[shocked]'' What did you say? ''[approaches her]'' 
:'''Steven''': Pearl, no...!  
:'''Pink Pearl''': It's a funny story, really. Once, Pink got tired of asking Yellow and Blue for her own colony, so she went straight to White. Of course, White told her she wasn't fit to run one, and, well, that set her off. 
:'''Pearl''': &quot;Set her off&quot;? What are you talking about?  
:'''Pink Pearl''': You remember how she was, with her destructive powers, throwing tantrums left and right. She had a scream that could crack the walls. She didn't mean to hurt me. ''[chuckles]'' I just happened to be standing too close to her that time, and--  
:'''Steven''': ''[covering his ears anxiously]'' Doesn't matter! I'm gonna fix it!  
:'''Pearl''': Destructive powers?! Pink didn't have destructive powers, she was a healer! She didn't throw tantrums, she kept her feelings secret!
:'''Pink Pearl''': The Pink I knew couldn't keep a secret to save her gem.  
:'''Pearl''': Are you kidding?! If anything, she was ''too'' good at keeping secrets, even from me!
:''[Frustrated by their arguing, Steven furiously snaps and starts glowing pink]''
:'''Steven''': ''[lividly]'' ''STOP IT!'' I CAN'T DEAL WITH ''ONE MORE'' HORRIBLE THING SHE DID, OKAY?! ''[Both Pearls gasp]'' I DON'T WANNA HEAR ABOUT IT, I DON'T EVEN WANNA ''THINK'' ABOUT IT!
:'''Pearl''': Steven!
:'''Steven''': I JUST WANT TO '''''FIX IT!!!'''''
:''[Steven unleashes a shockwave that causes cracks around the room. Pink Pearl cowers in fear, and Steven looks at his own reflection in shock and remorse]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pearl''': I'm sorry for not believing you. It looks like I'm still making excuses for her. 
:'''Pink Pearl''': ''[tearfully]'' Is that what ''I've'' been doing?! But... she didn't mean to! 
:'''Pearl''': But you were hurt! Badly hurt! 
:'''Pink Pearl''': I was badly hurt... How did ''you'' stop hurting? 
:'''Pearl''': ''[embraces her tightly]'' I didn't.
:''[Pink Pearl returns the hug, and they fuse into Mega Pearl]''
:'''Steven''': You fused!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I'm so sorry. The whole trip was for nothing. 
:'''Mega Pearl''': No, it wasn't for nothing. Your mother's Pearls never had the whole picture. One knew your mother was trying to change, but she couldn't understand why. The other never expected her to change at all. Now, I get to understand everything. Now, they finally get to have each other.
:''[She separates into the two Pearls, peacefully holding hands]''

===''Bluebird''===
:''[Greg is in the bathroom, brushing his hair, until Steven and the Gems enter for an emergency meeting]''
:'''Steven''': Don't panic. I think Bluebird is a fusion of Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot;!
:'''Amethyst''': Well, duh.
:'''Garnet''': It's pretty obvious.
:'''Steven''': What?! Well, how come you're all so calm about this?! Did you forget that Aquamarine kidnapped me? How about the fact that &quot;Eyeball&quot; tried to stab me (while we were stuck in space) and ratted me out while I was on trial? They must've fused because they both hate me!
:'''Garnet''': That was them. This is Bluebird.
:'''Steven''': But she pranked me earlier today! She put a sign on my back that said I... smelled good, switched my juice with tomato soup, neatly stack toilet paper... on top of my car?
:'''Pearl''': None of that stuff sounds particularly malicious.
:'''Amethyst''': Besides, don't you like tomato soup?
:'''Steven''': Yeah, but isn't it convenient that Bluebird just showed up here at my house?
:'''Pearl''': Steven, you've literally invited all problematic Gems from across the universe to come here and learn a better way of living.
:'''Steven''': Well, right.
:'''Greg''': Listen, Schtu-ball, if you don't want this Gem around, that's totally fair.
:'''Steven''': No, you guys are right. Everyone deserves a chance to change.
:'''Garnet''': Don't worry. If she tries anything funny, we'll be there to squash her.
:'''Steven''': Thanks, Garnet.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[after Greg breaks free of himself by using &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby's chisel knife to cut off his hair]'' Father, go inside. ''[Greg does so; turns pink, angrily to &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby and Aquamarine]'' I WON'T LET YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Tsk, tsk, tsk. You guys fused just because you hate me, didn't you?
:'''Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': Yes!
:'''Steven''': If that's the only reason, then it's no wonder you can't keep it together.
:'''Aquamarine''': What are you talking about?
:'''Steven''': There are so many other reasons to fuse, like friendship and responsibility and... and love. Imagine how much better it would feel to fuse to support each other, instead of tearing someone down. Your life would fill with warmth and friendship and joy and love and--
:'''&quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': ''[covering her ears; agitated]'' Wowie, wow! He is ''so'' annoying!
:'''Aquamarine''': ''[also agitated]'' I hate him so much!
:'''Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': I know! Me too! ''[they fuse back into Bluebird]''
:'''Steven''': ''[annoyed]'' Are you kidding me?
:'''Bluebird''': At last!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I'm really sorry, Dad. I never should have given Bluebird a chance.
:'''Greg''': I love how you believe in everyone. You stuck to your principles, and I'm proud of you. I mean, everyone can change, but not everyone wants to.

===''A Very Special Episode''===
:''[Rainbow Quartz 2.0 unfuses and Steven answers the call]''
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you're late. I need you for the Sunstone safety Geminar. 
:'''Steven''': ARGH!
:'''Garnet''': Don't worry, ''I'll'' handle the geminar. I'll explain to them every possible future where they get hurt in this house.
:'''Steven''': I don't know if that's a good idea. I'll be right there.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ocean Jasper''': I slip on the stairs?
:'''Garnet''': Yes. You shatter on impact.
:''[Ocean Jasper, Earth and Heaven Beetle, and a Nephrite scream]''
:'''Steven''': ''[enters through the door]'' Garnet, I'm here.
:'''Garnet''': Steven, help. I think I'm scaring them.
:'''Steven''': It's okay. We got this. Let's get this safety Geminar started with a very special guest speaker.
:''[They both dance and fuse into Sunstone]''
:'''Sunstone''': Your rockin' pal Sunstone's here to shine.
:'''Ocean Jasper''': Watch out, Sunstone. It's dangerous in here.
:'''Sunstone''': Not if you practice home safety. Don't slip up. Clear objects off the stairs. Foul shot! Make sure you cover your trash, or you might attract wild animals. Come on. Let's go! Don't leave the water running, it could flood your house. Put protective covers on electrical outlets, especially when kids are around. And most importantly, turn off motion smoothing on your TV.
:'''Ocean Jasper''': Wow, everything looks so much better!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Steven receives a call from Pearl, who he left to take care of Onion]''
:'''Steven''': ''[exhausted]'' Please, please have everything under control...  
:'''Pearl''': STEVEN! EVERYTHING IS OUT OF CONTROL!
:'''Steven''': Yup...
:'''Pearl''': It's getting really weird here! Steven, you were never like this, you were such a good kid! I'm so sorry I never told you that! Aah! I... I can hear him, but I can't see him! I think he's in the walls! I don't know how he got there, and I don't know how to get him out! ''[call ends]''
:'''Steven''': ''[long gasp]'' Garnet, can you handle things on your own for a little bit?  
:'''Garnet''': No problem. Our students love me. ''[walks over to them]'' Let me tell you all the ways you can get hit by a car.  
:'''Steven''': Agh, Garnet! Forget it. I'll stay. I'll stay!  
:'''Pearl''': ''[in another call]'' STEVEN, THERE'S A SNAKE!
:'''Steven''': Never mind!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rainbow Quartz 2.0''': Why play with sharp objects when you can play with my sharp wit? Crack jokes, not cookie jars, as I always say. Ha ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Garnet''': It's important to keep in mind that all these horrible things ''did'' happen to you in alternate timelines. Safety is fun.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Onion has led Garnet's students off a cliff]''
:'''Pearl''': Oh, no!
:'''Garnet''': Steven, quick! Sunstone can save them!
:'''Steven''': Okay... ''[they fuse into Sunstone]'' 
:'''Sunstone''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Pearl''': No! Let Rainbow save them! ''[fuses with Steven]''  
:'''Rainbow Quartz 2.0''': ''[showing his umbrella]'' I'll catch them with this!  
:'''Amethyst''': ''[rushing in]'' Hey, wait! ''I'' need Steven!
:'''Steven''' ''[unfuses from Pearl]'' What is it, Amethyst?  
:'''Amethyst''': I just miss you, man! I haven't seen you for, like, eleven minutes!

===''Snow Day''===
:''[One snowy day, Steven wakes up and starts getting ready for his busy day to run some errands]''
:'''Amethyst''': ''[entering the kitchen with fried eggs for eyes]'' You really gonna skip the most egg-ssential meal of the day?
:'''Steven''': Of course not. I've got all my morning nutrients in this protein shake.
:'''Amethyst''': ''[pokes yolk to leak]'' Dude, you're making me sad.
:'''Garnet''': Steven. I packed everything you're gonna need for today in your cheeseburger backpack.
:'''Steven''': Oh, uh, I don't really use that anymore. Besides, I packed my own bag.
:'''Garnet''': At least pet this cat.
:'''Cat Steven''': ''[popping out of the backpack]'' Meow.
:'''Steven''': Why was I going to need... ''[sighs]'' Never mind. Got to go.
:'''Pearl''': Hold it. According to my weather application, it's going to snow all day and overnight. You're going to freeze if you don't put on a puffer, a hat, and two scarves. Better make it three.
:'''Steven''': ''[muffling in denial]'' Pearl, I need to get going!
:'''Pearl''': But classes don't start for another couple of hours.
:'''Garnet''': Wait for us. We can head over together.
:'''Amethyst''': Why are you taking the old Dondai anyway? We have the warp technology.
:'''Steven''': It's because I've got errands to run in town before classes start.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[after returning home from his errands]'' Hey, guys.
:'''Amethyst''': Guess what we've got lined up tonight. &quot;Pupcopter's Sky-High Adventure&quot;!
:'''Pearl''': Sheet masks with cute animal faces!
:'''Garnet''': And, most importantly, pizza.
:'''Steven''': Guys, I've been a vegetarian for like, a month, and &quot;Pupcopter&quot; is for 6-year-olds, and I have my own skin care routine. Anyways, it's cool. I already ate. ''[walks upstairs]''
:'''Amethyst''': Oh, well. We'll just watch the movie with Cat Steven.
:'''Garnet''': My bad. I was sure we were in the pepperoni timeline.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Man, you had a better work-life balance when the Diamonds were trying to destroy the planet.
:'''Steven''': That was then. This is now.
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, you know what we haven't done in a long time? ''[shapeshifts into 14-year-old Steven]'' Steven Tag!
:'''Steven''': Amethyst, what the heck?!
:'''Amethyst''': You know the rules, buster. You get tagged, you have to turn into Steven.
:'''Steven''': But I'm already Steven!
:'''Amethyst''': Nah, bruh. ''Classic'' Steven.
:'''Steven''': ''Classic Steven?!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pearl''': Steven, what are you doing?
:'''Steven''': Pearl!
:'''Pearl''': Has cabin fever taken hold already?
:'''Steven''': It's Amethyst and Garnet! They're playing Steven Tag to mess with me!
:'''Pearl''': Steven Tag? Wow, that takes me back. Well, I'm sure they… ''[gets tagged by Garnet and falls on her knees to the floor]''
:'''Steven''': Ha! Joke's on you! Pearl doesn't shapeshift! ''[Pearl starts to glow]'' Huh?
:'''Pearl''': ''[shapeshifts into 14-year-old Steven]'' The power of Steven Tag COMPELS ME!
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckles]'' Wow. Good for her.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[shivering]'' They'll never stop until they make me play. ''[Alexandrite, in the form of 14-year-old Steven, appears behind him]'' Oh, jeez. ''[screams as Alexandrite blasts fire at him with her second mouth, but protects himself with his bubble shield]'' I really didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice. I ''JOIN'' THE GAME!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You shouldn't have messed with me. Huh? ''[gets tagged by Sapphire]''
:'''Sapphire''': Tag.
:'''Steven''': ''[falls off the lighthouse]'' Oh, no. Is this the end of my adult life?

===''Why So Blue?''===
:'''Steven''' You're right. This is harder than usual.  
:'''Lapis''': You've just got to force them to stop. This is going to be a fight. They're not nice like me.  
:'''Steven''': Umm...  
:'''Lapis''': Exactly.  
:'''Steven''': They just don't understand that they're doing harm. Y-you get it. What made it click for you?  
:'''Lapis''': ''A cycle of horrible torture.'' ''[smiling]'' But other than that, living in nature, getting creative.
:'''Steven''': Yeah! Come on, we can do that for them.  
:'''Lapis''': Okay. Just a little torture.  
:'''Steven''': N-no, just the other stuff. 
:'''Lapis''': ''[sighs]'' Fine, we'll try it your way.
:''[They head back to the two Lapis Lazulis]'' 
:'''Steven''': Hey, so, why don't we explore the many things that you can do that don't involve destroying worlds?  
:'''&quot;Mean&quot; Lapis''': Should we listen to him?  
:'''&quot;Nice&quot; Lapis''': He ''is'' half-Diamond. Maybe we should half-listen?  
:'''Steven''': I'll take that as a &quot;yes.&quot; Let's go.

===''Little Graduation''===
:'''Lars''': ''[about Shep]'' Say hi to them for me.

===''Prickly Pair''===
:'''Cactus Steven''': I can't tell Pearl how I feel, 'cause she'd blame herself! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cactus Steven''': I can't hear any more high and mighty advice from Garnet! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cactus Steven''': I'm so sick of Amethyst acting like she's so mature now!
:'''Amethyst''': Why's it being so weirdly specific?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, dude?
:'''Pearl''': Is there anything you need to talk about?
:'''Steven''': ''[softly]'' ... I think I've said enough.

===''In Dreams''===
:''[After Steven and Peridot have watched the'' Camp Pining Hearts ''reboot]''
:'''Steven''': Wha…? Wha…?!
:'''Steven and Peridot''': '''''WHAT HAVE THEY DONE?!?!?'''''  
:'''Peridot''': What is with this Rodrigo guy?! He has no charisma!  
:'''Steven''': And can we talk about this cinematography?!  
:'''Peridot''': GAAAH, THEY'VE CHANGED ''ALL'' THE CHARACTERS, AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANY OF THEM! ''[grabs the television]'' HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! ''[sobs] Camp Pining Hearts'' helped me escape when everything around me was in chaos...  
:'''Steven''': ''CPH'' brought us together... 
:'''Peridot''': And now, LOOK AT THIS NIGHTMARE! ''[the TV suddenly shows Steven's dream]'' Steven?! You didn't tell me that they cast you!  
:'''Steven''': What?! They didn't. I-Is this... my dream from last night? ''[on the TV, after Steven falls and the dream ends, it goes back to'' Camp Pining Hearts ''again]'' Whoa! My- My powers must be interfering with the TV signal!  
:'''Peridot''': ''[delighted]'' Steven! Do you know what this means?!  
:'''Steven''': I have to start wearing a tinfoil hat?  
:'''Peridot''': No! It means that if we can put your dreams on the television, we can reboot the reboot!  
:'''Steven''': &quot;Reboot the...?&quot; Peridot, you're a genius!  
:'''Peridot''': I know.
:'''Steven''': And, well, it might be fun to fix something that isn't the entire universe.  
:'''Peridot''': ''[grabs him with one arm]'' This is going to be the beginning of Peridot and Steven Productions!  
:'''Steven''': Yeah-- whoa! ''[topples onto her]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Peridot! We've always had something to fix together - the Cluster, the Diamonds, or Spinel! I don't think I know how to be a friend without something to fix! But I... I just can't do it anymore! I'm so tired... Now I'm even doing it in my dreams! I'm sorry, I can't do this for you. Please don't leave! Don't... leave!
:''[The dream stops, in the manner of a TV turning off; Steven awakens, in tears, to Peridot's concerned voice]''
:'''Peridot''': Steven? Steven! STEVEN! Steven, I saw everything! It's-- It's fine! We don't have to do this anymore. ''[hugs him and starts tearing up]'' I don't care about the show, and I ''definitely'' don't care about Rodrigo! Hrrrgh, I'm such a clod!
:'''Steven''': But I really wanted to spend time with you! I just... wanted an excuse to hang out.
:'''Peridot''': We don't need an excuse to hang out.
:'''Steven''': Can... we still watch ''CPH'' together? Even if it sucks?
:'''Peridot''': ''[removes her visor to wipe her eyes, and smiles]'' Of course.
:''[Later, they watch the show]''
:'''Jasmine''': ''[in the show, angrily]'' How could you lie to me like that, Rodrigo?! I guess you just can't help being a bad person!
:''[Steven and Peridot laugh]''
:'''Peridot''': Jasmine, you just ''buried a body in the woods'', and now you're mad that Rodrigo cheated at ''cards?!''
:''[They laugh again]''
:'''Peridot''': This show is the worst!
:'''Steven''': ''[smiling warmly at her]'' This show is the best.

===''Bismuth Casual''===
:''[At the Starlight Roller Rink]''
:'''Bismuth''': Woooow! So you mean to tell me people pay to have wheels strapped to their feet for fun? That is really something else.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Patricia''': You should have seen Daniel earlier. He was all bent out of shape 'cos his mom tore into him over his last test scores!
:'''Daniel''': ''[groans]'' You know, I kind of forgot about it for a sec.
:'''Steven''': Heh... I know how that is. One time, White Diamond tore into me... literally! ''[laughs awkwardly]'' She, uh, she took my gem - I'm part Gem, by the way - she pulled it right out of my body.
:'''Daniel''': Okay...?
:'''Patricia''': So what grade are you in, Steven?
:'''Steven''': Grade? Err, uh... sixteen?
:'''Patricia''': ''[laughs]''
:'''Daniel''': So you're taking AP classes?
:'''Steven''': Uh...
:'''Connie''': Y'all ready to skate?
:'''Patricia''': Heck, yeah!
:''[Connie, Patricia and Daniel skate away]''
:'''Steven''': I really blew that one. Bet if they were enemy Gems, we'd be best friends by now.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Pearl forms a roll of toilet paper from her gem and gives it to Bismuth]''
:'''Pearl''': Oh, here, take this. Every human has at least one of these in their homes. Sometimes they even use it ''[secretively]'' for vandalism! Good luck out there! ''[starts skating away]''
:'''Bismuth''': Wait, where are you going?
:'''Pearl''': You don't need me anymore, Bismuth - the humans already love you! I'm going to make some new connections of my own! ''[to a random skater]'' Hello, fellow skater! Would you like a fresh roll? ''[forms another roll]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': When Connie and I were fighting to save the universe, things were sort of easier. We were fighting the same fight. Now it's like we're living different lives. I wonder if I'm even her best friend anymore...
:'''Bismuth''': ''[pounds the table firmly]'' How long has this been going on?
:'''Steven''': Err... couple of months.
:'''Bismuth''': Listen, Steven. Pearl brought me here to set me up with her friends, but Connie came here to be with ''you.'' You've got nothing to mope about.
:'''Steven''': But her friends think I'm weird.
:'''Bismuth''': Of course you're weird! You're a Crystal Gem! Connie knows that, she's always known that! That never stopped you from being friends!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Steven collapses in the rink]''
:'''Connie''': Steven! Are you okay?
:'''Steven''': Connie, I'm sorry... I don't wanna hold you back.
:'''Connie''': I don't mind.
:'''Steven''': You've got school, new friends, you're going places and... I'm happy for you. But I feel like you're drifting away from me. I wish we could reconnect, but... BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SKATE!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Steven and Connie win the skating contest as Stevonnie]''
:'''Patricia''': Steven, Connie, that was amazing!
:'''Daniel''': What the heck was that out there?
:'''Connie''': Oh, fusion? Yeah, that's kind of our thing.
:'''Steven''': It's something I picked up from my mom's side of the family.
:'''Daniel''': The only thing I get from my mom's side of the family is ''stressed out.''
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckles]'' Same...

===''Together Forever''===
:''[After Connie turns down Steven's proposal]''
:'''Steven''': I don't get it. Ruby and Sapphire said I should go for it.  
:'''Garnet''': You can't trust love advice from those two hopeless romantics.  
:'''Steven''': Then why didn't you stop me?  
:'''Garnet''': There was no future where you didn't propose to Connie.  
:'''Steven''': Of course...
:'''Garnet''': ''[hugs him]'' Your soulmate is your complement, not your missing piece. Ruby and Sapphire love being together, but they each have their own individual lives. Whatever hole there is in your life, Steven, I want you to understand that Connie-Stevonnie won't be able to fill it.

===''Growing Pains''===
:'''Priyanka''': Steven, do you remember anything bad in your childhood that particularly stuck with you?
:'''Steven''': I guess… I kind of freaked out when they [[w:Gem Glow|cancelled my favorite ice cream]]. And then I got attacked by a giant bug monster. And I got trapped in a bubble and almost drowned. I lost control of my body and turned into a blob of cats. I almost turned so old I died. Amethyst almost died. Pearl [[w:Steven the Sword Fighter|''did'' die]]. Garnet got destabilized right in front of me. I woke up with a black eye, [[w:Jail Break (Steven Universe)|imprisoned on a spaceship]]--
:'''Priyanka''': Steven, this is serious!
:'''Steven''': But that was just the early stuff.
:'''Priyanka''': I think all these experiences have been subjecting your body to a harmful amount of stress, and that's affecting your ability to respond to new forms of stress in a healthy way. You've been dealing with genuine threats from such a young age, your body is now responding to minor threats as if your life were in danger.
:'''Steven''': But, why am I only swelling up now?
:'''Priyanka''': Stress is less harmful when we have people we trust to help us through it. Maybe if... if you're losing your supportive relationships, or if you have a recent experience that was particularly awf--
:''[Steven remembers his failed proposal to Connie, and immediately starts stressing and swelling up]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Greg''': Come on, Steven, talk to me.
:'''Steven''': ''[tearing up]'' I... well... I, um... I proposed to Connie!
:'''Greg''': You what?!
:'''Steven''': She said no.
:'''Greg''': Oh, Steven...
:'''Steven''': My body... it's reacting like it's the end of the world. I think I've seen the world almost end so many times now that ''everything'' that goes wrong feels that... that extreme! I should be feeling so good these days! The Earth is safe, it's Era 3... But I'm swelling up over these third era problems! What do I do? How do I move on from all the stuff I've been through? How do I live life if it always feels like I'm about to die?!
:'''Greg''': It's gonna be all right, Stewball. I'm here for you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I guess I thought I could just follow Connie to college, like if we got married I'd know what to do with myself. But I'm the one that's gotta figure that stuff out.
:'''Greg''': Cut yourself some slack! It's okay to be worried and make some mistakes when you're figuring out what to do with your life. That's not unusual. Uh, well, the magic swelling is a little unusual, but that's okay too! If you want to be a giant boy, we can use the car wash as a shower.

=== ''Mr. Universe'' ===
:'''Steven''': I don't need this song! I need...I need what you had!
:'''Greg''': What?
:'''Steven''': I wish I could've grown up at a house like that.
:'''Greg''': No you don't!
:'''Steven''': Maybe your parents weren't so bad. Maybe they gave you curfews and chaperones and meatloaf f-for a reason!
:'''Greg''': Steven, you don't know what they were like!
:'''Steven''': They can't be worse then mom's family. I went halfway across the galaxy for them, and this was right here?!
:'''Greg''': Steven, I couldn't do anything growing up. Everything I liked, or wore, wanted was always wrong! Trust me, you're better off then I was.
:'''Steven''': I can't believe I never realized, you're... you're just like Mom! ''[turns pink as his grip tightens on the steering wheel]''
:'''Greg''': You grew up with actual freedom!
:'''Steven''': I grew up in a ''van!'' I never went to school! I've never been to the doctor until two days ago!
:'''Greg''': Steven! You're a gem! You're not like other kids!
:'''Steven''': I could have done all that stuff! My problem isn't that I'm a gem, my problem is that I'm a ''UNIVERSE!!''

===''Fragments''===
:'''Pearl''': How could this happen? You crashed the van with Greg inside? You know how fragile he is, these pink outbursts of yours are getting out of hand.
:'''Steven''': It's not an ''OUTBURST! [turns pink and swells up]''
:'''Pearl''': See? This is exactly what I'm talking about! What's happening to you?
:'''Steven''': Nothing! ...It's nothing.
:'''Pearl''': S-Steven! Where are you going?! We're not pro- ''[Steven summons out a generated force field]'' Steven! Drop this wall!
:'''Steven''': Pearl, sorry. I'm trying- I just… need… some space, OK? I'll be in my room.
:'''Amethyst''': Not so fast, my dude. You gotta tell us what's going on.
:'''Garnet''': It looks like Steven is trying to avoid a serious discussion about this ''all'' together.
:'''Steven''': '''NO, I'M''' &lt;big&gt;'''NOT!!!'''&lt;/big&gt; ''[slams his fist into the stairs in rage, unleashing a room-wrecking shockwave]''
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you have got to calm down and talk to us!
:'''Amethyst''': Just chill, man!
:'''Steven''': Nnghh…
:'''Pearl''': We need to do something about this before someone gets hurt!
:'''Steven''': NNGGHH…
:'''Garnet''': Don't let this power control you. You're better than this.
:'''Steven''': NNGGHH… &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[notices the Gems are walking in slow-motion]'' I'm…speeding up again. I gotta get out of here.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': This thing with my powers is a real problem!
:'''Jasper''': The only problem you have are your friends.
:'''Steven''': Huh?
:'''Jasper''': Can't you see they're holding you back?
:'''Steven''': What? No, they're-- they're just worried about me.
:'''Jasper''': They're afraid. Of your power.
:'''Steven''': Yeah... yeah, I guess so...
:'''Jasper''': You are too. You came all the way out here to hide from it. But ''I'm'' not here to hide. I don't stifle my anger or my power; I channel it into training!
:'''Steven''': Oh, right... this destroyed forest.
:'''Jasper''': I've got no one to serve, nowhere to go. All I have left is '''''POWER!''' [she punches a tree, completely smashing it apart]'' And in order to control that power, I have to ''use'' it. Those so-called &quot;friends&quot; of yours don't understand. They want you to feel bad for being yourself.
:'''Steven''': I ''do'' feel bad… ''[steps over to another tree and punches it, cringing in pain and remorse]''
:'''Jasper''': YEAH, DESTROY THAT WEAKLING TREE!
:'''Steven''': No! ''[kisses the tree, healing it and making grass sprout around it]''
:'''Jasper''': Ugh! Gross! That's disgusting! Bleh! No! The grass! ''[tears at it]'' Get outta here! ''[grabs Steven]'' Quit helping the local ecosystem recover!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[On Steven's new, more muscular form]''
:'''Jasper''': Hm. Not bad for three days of work. ''[Steven kisses one of his biceps]'' I didn't teach you that…

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jasper''': What are you holding back for?! You think I can't take it? I'm not gonna coddle you, Steven! Do you wanna go home to your Gems?
:'''Steven''': No…
:'''Jasper''': Are you afraid to be strong? Are you pathetic? Are you ''weak?''
:'''Steven''': &lt;big&gt;'''''I'M NOT!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You're right, Jasper… I ''have'' been holding back.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Having shattered Jasper after losing control in their rematch, Steven hurries back to his bathroom and dips the fragments into Diamond aura potions]''
:'''Steven''': Please, please let this work! ''[crying]'' Jasper, I'm sorry. Please… come back. ''[his tears add Pink's aura to the mix]'' Please…
:''[After a while, Jasper's gem glows and heals, and she reforms]''
:'''Jasper''': ''[panting]'' Huh? What? You... ''shattered'' me?
:'''Steven''': Jasper! I-I'm so sorry, I should have stopped! I-I just wasn't thinking!  
:'''Jasper''': ''[steps out of the bathtub and bows on one knee]'' I bow to your strength… ''my Diamond.''  
:'''Steven''': ''[horrified]'' No...!

===''Homeworld Bound''===
:'''Pearl''': ''[knocks on the bathroom door]'' Steven?
:'''Amethyst''': What's going on in there? ''[Jasper emerges]'' Jasper?!
:'''Pearl''': What are you-?
:'''Amethyst''': Where's Steven?!
:'''Jasper''': Right here. ''[steps aside, revealing him looking scared and depressed]''
:'''Amethyst''': Steven? Where have you been?!
:''[Steven walks off upstairs to his conservatory]''
:'''Pearl''': You can't just disappear for days without telling us!
:'''Jasper''': My Diamond can do as he pleases.
:'''Amethyst''': Wait, what?!
:'''Pearl''': Why are you calling him that?!
:'''Garnet''': Steven!
:'''Pearl''': Where is he going?!
:''[The Gems follow Steven to his conservatory]''
:'''Pearl''': Steven, wait!
:'''Garnet''': You don't need to go.
:''[Steven turns pink and puts a barrier in front of the Gems and Jasper as he sighs]''
:'''Amethyst''': What the HECK?!
:'''Steven''': You guys… I love you, but you ''can't'' help me anymore. I've been avoiding the only people in the entire universe who can. Please, don't follow me. You too, Jasper. Find something better to do with your life.
:'''Garnet''': Steven! Remember, we'll always be your family.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spinel''': STEVEN! ''[grabs him and kisses him]''
:'''Steven''': ''[turning pink]'' Spinel, what is wrong with you?!
:'''Spinel''': Oh, y'know, the usual.
:'''Steven''': ''[turning back to normal]'' So, how've you been since, err...?
:'''Spinel''': Since I tried to kill you? That was so embarrassing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[controlling White Diamond]'' Whoa. This is… so weird. I'm-I'm, I'm a Diamond. This- This is the last thing I needed to see! ''[angrily]'' I don't wanna be you! I don't wanna be anything like you! Why won't you just go '''AWAY?!''' ''[punches a pillar]'' Don't hurt me! She can't hurt me. I'm controlling her. So why am I so afraid? ''[remembers the memory of White pulling his gemstone out of his navel; scowls darkly] '''She's''''' the one who should be afraid.
:'''White Diamond''': ''[talking in Steven's voice]'' What's- what's going on? ''[Steven starts controlling her like a puppet]'' What? No, stop it. I don't like this!
:'''Steven''': Too bad. ''[force controls her by walking her to a pillar]''
:'''White Diamond''': Let me go! ''[grabs hold of the pillar]'' Please! You're scaring me!
:'''Steven''': This is for '''''everything''''' you put me through! ''[forces White Diamond to slam her head into the pillar, in an attempt to shatter her gemstone, instead, snaps them out of it and hits his own head, allowing White Diamond to regain her control again]''
:'''White Diamond''': ''[breathing; horrified]'' What… what ''was'' that?!
:'''Steven''': I-I don't know.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spinel''': Hey, buddy, where you going?
:'''Steven''': Wait a second - ''you'' used to have vengeful thoughts!
:'''Spinel''': ''[awkwardly]'' Ooooh, yeah... but I don't get 'em anymore.
:'''Steven''': How did you make them stop?
:'''Spinel''': I met a little someone named Steven Universe! And he told me: ''[singing]'' [[w:Steven Universe: The Movie|I–I–I–I–I–I, I can make a chaaaaange! You can make a promise...]]
:'''Steven''': Gah! Don't give me my own advice!

===''Everything's Fine''===
:'''Steven''': Hey, Connie, what's up?
:'''Connie''': Steven! Good, you finally picked up! I can't believe we haven't spoken since the hospital. How are you?
:'''Steven''': I'm great! Never been better!
:'''Connie''': Really? Have you had any more issues with swelling and glowing pink?
:'''Steven''': Um... Nope? Well, maybe, but how about you? How's college prep?
:'''Connie''': Steven, that's, uh- It's fine, but what do you mean, maybe?
:'''Steven''': Look, there's nothing to worry about. I'm OK.
:'''Connie''': Steven...
:'''Steven''': I should go. I don't wanna wake up the Gems.
:'''Connie''': But they don't even sleep!
:'''Steven''': Uh, bye!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[While trying to help in Bismuth's workshop]''
:'''Steven''': Ooh, look at that. Now you have ''two'' anvils.
:'''Bismuth''': Noooo! My anvil! My beautiful anvil!
:'''Steven''': Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, my work here is done. Well, toodles!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Connie''': Steven!
:'''Steven''': Huh?
:'''Connie''': I knew it! You ''are'' swelling and glowing again. I've been trying to call you, but I came as soon as I saw this. ''[holds out her phone, on which Steven, glowing and swelled up, is doing the plant Steven's dance and looping the message &quot;Steven's here to help!&quot;]'' What is going on?
:'''Steven''': I... broadcast my subconscious sometimes these days. It's really no big deal.
:'''Connie''': Okay, but... I can tell something is bothering you. ''[holds out her phone again; the message makes some statics]''
:'''Steven''': Ah, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine! Awesome, in fact. Come on, you've seen me when I wasn't doing well.
:'''Greg''': Steven, if being like this is what you want, then we'll support you one hundred percent. Whatever makes you happy. But, if you're not happy, if something's wrong-
:'''Steven''': Nothing's wrong! Besides, I don't want you to worry.
:'''Connie''': We ''are'' worried!
:'''Greg''': Steven, you know you can tell us anything.
:'''Steven''': It's not that easy! You know what? I don't have to deal with this! ''[walks towards the door, but Amethyst, Pearl, and Connie block his way]''
:'''Amethyst''': Hold up, dude.
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you need to stop running.
:'''Greg''': Please.
:''[Steven starts groaning in frustration, his head briefly swelling out of shape]''
:'''Connie''': Steven, we should get you back to the hospital.
:'''Amethyst and Pearl''': HOSPITAL?!
:'''Pearl''': When were you in the hospital?!
:'''Connie''': You didn't tell them?!
:'''Steven''': 	''[becoming hysterical, starting to laugh uneasily]'' It wasn't that important, you guys! You're making a big deal out of nothing. Have I done some things wrong? Sure! I trashed the house today, I broke an anvil - what teenager hasn't? Dad and I had a little disagreement, but that's practically a rite of passage! I mean, it would be weird if we didn't, right? And ''maybe'' I've had a not-so-nice thought or two about, like, you know, slamming White Diamond's head through a pillar, but it's not like I actually went through with it! I only ''actually'' shattered Jasper!
:''[Pearl gasps in horrified shock]''
:'''Amethyst''': WHAT?!
:''[Garnet, Connie, and Greg all gasp in horror]''
:'''Connie''': You're- you're joking, right?
:'''Steven''': Oh, don't worry! I fixed that too! I can fix ''anything!'' I can just keep messing up and fixing things forever, and you'll never have to know or think about any of it!
:'''Garnet''': Steven...
:'''Steven''': ''[sighs; finally loses it]'' How messed up is that? That I've gotten away with this for so long? You have ''no'' idea how bad I am! Y-You think I'm so great, and I'm so mature, and I always know what to do! But ''that's'' not true! I haven't learned a thing from my problems! They've all just made me worse! You all think of me as some angel, but I'm not that kid anymore! ''[scowls]'' I'm a fraud. ''[falls to the floor; breathing shakily]'' I'm a fraud. I'm a MONSTER! ''[massive pink spikes burst out of his back, tearing his shirt with everyone taking  a step back, with plain terror]''

===''I Am My Monster''===
:'''Greg''': ''[calling out]'' Just calm down, son! Take deep breaths! Deep breaths!
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah! Relax, buddy!
:'''Peridot''': Let's hurry up and clobber that thing!
:'''Garnet''': Stand down.
:'''Peridot''': What for?!
:'''Lapis''': Where's Steven?
:'''Garnet''': That ''is'' Steven.
:'''Peridot, Bismuth &amp; Lapis''': ''[shocked]'' WHAT?!
:''[Monster Steven bashes his head against the cliff of the temple, causing an avalanche of boulders to fall]''
:'''Garnet''': RUN!
:'''Amethyst''': He's not listening to us at all!
:'''Pearl''': What happened to him? First, he says he's a shatterer and then he's turned into this...''thing''!
:'''Connie''': We can change him back, can't we?
:'''Garnet''': As long as he believes he's a monster, he'll ''stay'' one.
:'''Bismuth''': We gotta keep him away from the town!
:'''Garnet''': Connie, do what you can to protect the townspeople.
:'''Connie''': Right!
:'''Garnet''': ''[to Bismuth, Lapis, and Peridot]'' You three, joint him into the ocean and hold him there. Let's go, guys. ''[she, Amethyst, and Pearl fuse into Alexandrite]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Spinel and the Diamonds arrive in their ship]''
:'''Spinel''': ''[emerging, holding Steven's flip flop he left behind on Homeworld]'' You forgot your foot thong thingy! ''[sees Monster Steven]'' OOOH, OH!
:''[The Diamonds walk out of the ship]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': What is going on here?
:'''White Diamond''': Why is something like this ''always'' happening when we show up for a visit?
:'''Blue Diamond''': What is that thing?
:'''Garnet''': That &quot;thing&quot; is Steven.
:''[Blue Diamond, White Diamond, and Spinel all gasp in shock]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': What?!
:'''White Diamond''': Impossible!
:'''Blue Diamond''': Is he corrupted?
:'''Yellow Diamond''': But how?
:'''Garnet''': Never mind that. We have to change him back.
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Leave it to me. ''[she catches Monster Steven's head in an energy aura and tries to shrink it down, only for it to revert back immediately, to her confusion]'' With my new power, I should be able to alter his physical form.
:'''Blue Diamond''': He's resisting. Maybe he needs to feel better first. I can help with that. ''[she sends a cloud of joy towards Monster Steven, but he blows it right back]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Look out! ''[the cloud hits her and Spinel, and they start laughing uncontrollably]'' Wow! Your new power didn't work either!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[pushes Yellow and Blue aside and approaches Monster Steven]'' Enough. I know exactly how to help. If I connect with him and he speaks through me, maybe we'll understand what he's going through. Now then, do you hear me, Steven? ''[her gem glows and the atmosphere's colors change]'' Just relax and let me in… Wait-- ''[her eyes glow, and she cries out and falls back as Yellow and Blue catch her]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': White!
:'''Blue Diamond''': What happened?!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[horrified]'' That's ''not'' Steven anymore!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Guys, look! The Cluster is trying to hold Steven back!
:'''Peridot''': I can't believe it! He's even stronger than the Cluster!
:'''Bismuth''': Don't let your guard down. He could break free at any moment!
:'''Pearl''': Deep inside this…monster, Steven must be in there, so angry.
:'''Amethyst''': I knew something was going on. I- Why didn't I ''do'' something?!
:'''Sapphire''': ''[crying]'' If we don't get through to him, he'll stay like this ''forever!'' ''[starts sobbing along with Ruby while Lapis watches]''
:'''Amethyst''': ''[to Greg as he takes a few steps back]'' Dude, you should get outta here before you get hurt!
:'''Greg''': ''[stomps his foot]'' NO! Everytime Gem stuff happens, I run the other way! This is ''my'' son! And he's right to be angry, because I didn't protect him!
:'''Blue Diamond''': ''[tearing up; crying]'' You didn't protect him from us! He's like this because of us!
:'''Yellow Diamond''': ''[crying]'' ''We're'' the source of Steven's suffering!
:'''Spinel''': ''[breaks down, sobbing hysterically and blowing her nose into her pigtails]'' THIS IS ''MY'' FAULT!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[crying]'' Spinel, don't be silly. Everyone knows that all of this is because of ''me!''
:'''Spinel''': No, it's ME! I tried to wipe his friends' memories, so he would die alone on a barren world!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[sobbing sorrowfully]'' That was because you were angry with Pink! And if Pink hurt you, it was because ''I'' hurt ''her!'' Like I hurt Yellow and Blue and Steven and everyone in the entire universe! This is all ''my'' fault!
:'''Connie''': YES, it is! ''[rides in on Lion]'' Yes, you hurt him, but this isn't the time to make this all about you! That is not helping! Maybe Steven would care how sad you are, because he always puts everyone else's feelings first! But he can't do that for you right now, because he needs ''us'' this time! We all have Steven when we needed him. But the only person who's never had Steven is Steven! He's ''always'' been there for us, so… how can we be there for him now?
:''[Ruby and Sapphire smile and fuse back into Garnet]''
:'''Garnet''': I know how. ''[Monster Steven breaks free of the Cluster's hand, defeating it and charges at the beach]'' Okay! No time to waste. Yellow, make me as big as him!
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Right.
:'''Garnet''': Blue, lift everyone up!
:'''Blue Diamond''': Of course.
:'''Garnet''': Everyone, get in line!
:'''Greg''': You got it!
:'''Garnet''': It's time to show Steven… some love.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Garnet''': ''[hugging her arms tightly around Monster Steven while he struggles; calmly]'' Steven, when I fell apart, you were there for me. I want to be there for ''you'' now. I'm here, Steven. I'm here.
:'''Lapis''': This is working? You hear us? Steven! ''[comes and hugs him]''
:''[Everyone comes in for the hug too]''
:'''Greg''': I'm here, Schtu-Ball! Whatever you need, I'll make it happen! You hear me?!
:'''Peridot''': Steven, you never gave up on me for some reason I don't understand! I'll do the same for you!
:'''Amethyst''': I know you feel bad! Believe me, I get it! Sometimes it feels like you're never gonna like yourself but… it's possible, man!
:'''Pearl''': Steven, I know how awful it feels to keep a part of yourself secret! You shouldn't have to hide anything from me!
:''[Monster Steven stammers emotionally, and the Cluster's hand reappears and takes his]''
:'''Connie''': ''[jumps off Lion's head before landing on Monster Steven's nose and hugs his face; sighs]'' Steven… you must have been ''so'' afraid to show us this side of yourself, but we're not going anywhere. We're all gonna take care of you the same way you took care of us. You know what? I don't have your powers, but… ''[kisses him with a pink droplet appearing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[wakes up, back to his normal human-self, still crying]'' Huh? ''[looks and sees everyone smiling at him]'' Wha…I… Did-Did I-I'm- ''[Lion pops up and licks him; chuckling]'' Lion. ''[hugs Lion]'' Lion! ''[begins sobbing, letting out his emotions]''

===''The Future''===
:'''Jasper''': ''[bursts through the wall, staying aloof]'' Heard you're leaving. ''[faces at Steven]'' I'm coming with you!
:'''Steven''': Jasper, I'm going ''alone.''
:'''Jasper''': Then who will protect you?!
:'''Steven''': I can protect myself.
:'''Jasper''': ''[sighs disappointedly, scowls]'' I know. ''[punches a hole in the ground and looks the opposite direction]'' Farewell, my Diamond. ''[headbutts the wall, creating another Jasper-shaped hole next to the previous one, walks through it]''
:'''Steven''': Whoa! Even Jasper's more upset than my own family! Maybe I need a round two?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Garnet''': I couldn't resist looking into your future. I peeked, and I saw a possibility that our tears would keep you from leaving. But I also saw many paths ahead of you, and we are a part of ''all'' of them. Wherever you end up, we will visit you to talk, to listen, to be there – whenever you need us. We love you, Steven.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:Steven Universe]]</text>
      <sha1>khu9y7txcbdq5eeuyrybmb26vafaoh9</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965053</id>
      <parentid>3965049</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:09:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39683-94</username>
        <id>3350039</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Snow Day */</comment>
      <origin>3965053</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="57195" sha1="h3adx8y90ba1qemdqz1lsa25xrvpyt4" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Steven Universe (season 1)|1]] [[Steven Universe (season 2)|2]] [[Steven Universe (season 3)|3]] [[Steven Universe (season 4)|4]] [[Steven Universe (season 5)|5]] | [[Steven Universe: The Movie|Film]] | [[Steven Universe Future|Future]] | [[Steven Universe: Lars of the Stars|Lars of the Stars]] | [[Steven Universe|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Steven Universe Future|Steven Universe Future]]''''' (2019–2020) is an animated limited series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] as an epilogue for [[Steven Universe (season 5)|Season 5]] of ''[[Steven Universe]]'' and ''[[Steven Universe: The Movie]]''.

==Episodes==
===''Little Homeschool''===
:''[Steven is in his bathroom, filling up the tub with warm water, drips a drop from each Diamond aura bottle and his healing spit into the water, turning it into rainbow-colored healing]''
:'''Steven''': ''[grabbing a bubbled gem]'' Happy welcome-back-day. ''[places the bubble in the bathtub and it pops, dunking the gem into the water; Cherry Quartz is reformed from her formerly-corrupted state, and gets startled by her return while stumbling]'' Hello!
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Where am I? Who are you?
:'''Steven''': That used to be a loaded question, but now I can say with confidence that I'm Steven Universe! And you're in my bathroom.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': ''[looks at herself in the mirror]'' What happened to me? ''[gasps and grabs the plunger]'' What is this?! ''[points it at Steven]''
:'''Steven''': You were corrupted in a Diamond blast, but you've just been healed! And that is a plunger... ''[they exit the bathroom and into his house]'' Let me fill you in on everything you've missed.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Missed?
:'''Steven''': We have some reading material, available in both English and Gem Glyph. ''[hands her a pair of brochures, titled &quot;You &amp; Your New Horns&quot; and &quot;Era 3 &amp; Me!&quot;]'' Spanish translation forthcoming. ''[they then exit the house towards the Dondai; as Cherry Quartz curls herself in the passenger seat]'' Watch your head. ''[inserts a cassette tape into the music player and begins driving]'' Life is a little different these days. The Diamonds have ended their reign of terror, the intergalactic war is over, and Earth is officially an independent planet. We're all safe to explore our dreams. Lars opened up his own pastry shop, and it's got a real cute space gimmick goin' on. Sadie's been touring with The Suspects, promoting their new album, and Connie has been getting a head start on college prep. She's two years away from applying, but she says it doesn't hurt to start early. And speaking of higher education, Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl and I have been cooking up a dream of our own!
:'''Cherry Quartz''': I have no idea who you're talking about.
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckling]'' Don't worry about it. You'll learn all that, and more, right here at Little Homeschool! ''[gives Cherry Quartz a tour around]'' Here at Little Homeschool, you have a chance to rediscover yourself, and learn to live on Earth if you like. You can forge a new identity. Grow your own ideas. And even find your inner morp.
:'''Cherry Quartz''': Wait, what's a morp?
:'''Steven''': That's ''exactly'' the kind of question we love to hear!
:'''Garnet''': ''[teaching various Gems in a yoga class]'' Find your center, your very core. Remember, your body isn't just a projection of light, but also a reflection of your inner soul.
:'''Steven''': ''[standing upside-down]'' Garnet teaches, uhh... All sorts of stuff.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You know, half those Gems are soldiers who fought by your side before they were corrupted and turned into monsters. They're lost and confused and still a little messed up, but they're getting the help they need.
:'''Jasper''': Like all the other Gems you ''use.''
:'''Steven''': ''[frustrated]'' AGGGHHH! I only came here because I felt bad for you, but all of this is your own fault! All the other Gems were corrupted by the Diamonds, but-- but you corrupted yourself just to win a fight! Which you ''LOST!'' To ''ME!'' No one's making you stay here all alone in the middle of nowhere, ready to fight a war that's been over for years! Are you just gonna sit here for centuries waiting for someone to give you a purpose?! ''Because I'm trying to give you one!''
:'''Jasper''': Listen, weakling! You might have Pink Diamond's gem, but you are ''not'' my Diamond, and I am ''not'' going to take orders from some weak, sappy, useless piece of dirt! If you think you're hard enough to tell me what to do, then fight me and prove it.
:'''Steven''': Fine!
:'''Jasper''': ''[suddenly smiles eagerly]'' Really? Huh, well then! Why don't you throw the first punch? ''[beckons tauntingly, and Steven punches her, pushing her back a few feet]'' Ooohh...! ''[laughs aggressively and charges back at him]''
:'''Steven''': I... guess we're doing this.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[During his fight with Jasper, Steven bubbles a nest of baby birds to protect them]''
:'''Jasper''': Stop trying to help those tiny flapping Earthlings, and ''FIGHT ME!'' 
:'''Steven''': I'll never stop trying to help them, or you!
:'''Jasper''': ''[kicking his shield away and pinning him down]'' I don't need your help! ''You're'' the one that needs help! You think you've beaten me, but you've never beaten me on your own! You've always been a fusion! You've always had your friends! Because you're nothing without them! You think everyone needs help!
:'''Steven''': ''[tearing up]'' I-- I just--  
:'''Jasper''': But ''it's only you. No one'' is as '''''pitiful''''' as '''''you!'''''
:''[Shaken and angry, Steven starts to glow pink and pushes Jasper back with a sudden burst of strength, much to her surprise]''
:'''Steven''': ''[looking at himself]'' Whoa... what? ''[Jasper grins, and Steven angrily summons a bubble glove and charges at her with it]'' I'M... ''NOT''... PITIFUL! ''[sends her flying back through several trees]''
:'''Jasper''': ''[chuckles]'' Ha. Not bad. ''[continues to fight Steven, who catches her in the middle of a spin-dash]'' Nice catch.
:'''Steven''': You should see my ''THROW!'' ''[tosses her up into the air, where she laughs as he hits her several more times]'' STOP LAUGHING! ''[sends her slamming back down into the ground, then gasps in shock and returns to normal]'' Jasper...
:'''Jasper''': ''[gets up and shakes herself off, impressed]'' Huh. I didn't think you had it in you.  
:'''Steven''': I don't... I don't know what that was. I'm sorry.  
:'''Jasper''': ''[rolling her eyes]'' Ugh! Don't apologize.  
:'''Steven''': I... think I had you all wrong. Maybe you don't have something to learn from me. Maybe I have something to learn from you. ''[Jasper raises an eyebrow]'' Would you ever be interested in teaching?  
:'''Jasper''': ''[scoffs]'' Tssh! At your crummy little school?
:'''Steven''': No, just me. You brought something out of me I didn't know I had.  
:'''Jasper''': ''[walks up to Steven, placing a hand on his shoulder]'' Consider that fight back there your first and ''only'' lesson. ''[begins walking off]''  
:'''Steven''': Well... can I come back to see you sometime?  
:'''Jasper''': Do what you want.

===''Guidance''===
:'''Steven''': I didn't know Bixbite wanted a career in the culinary arts.
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, we talked a lot about her interests and experiences. Then, I spoke to Kofi and set her up here.
:'''Steven''': This was your idea?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, and she's just the beginning. I wanted to do something big for the school, so I've been pairing Gems up with human jobs. The results have been amazing! I call it: the Gem-Human Excellence Mentorship, or G-H-E-M.
:'''Steven''': Oh, I get it, like GEM.
:'''Amethyst''': No, it's G''H''EM. There's an &quot;H&quot;.
:''[Two Ruby bodyguards appear and stand on guard at the doorway]''
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #1''': All clear, my Mayor.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #2''': All clear.
:''[Mayor Nanefua enters afterward]''
:'''Steven''': You've got Rubies in your program, too?
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah, and these two are Nanefua's new bodyguards.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Hmm, I don't know about this.
:'''Amethyst''': About what?
:'''Steven''': Ice Gems doing ice stuff, pilot Gems doing pilot stuff, guard Gems doing guard stuff. Isn't this exactly what they were doing on Homeworld?
:'''Amethyst''': ''[chuckles]'' No.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #1''': It's ''just'' like we used to do on Homeworld!
:'''Ruby Bodyguard #2''': Thanks, Amethyst!
:'''Amethyst''': These are the jobs they wanted.
:'''Steven''': Well, sure, they ''think'' they want to do this stuff. But, it's up to us to get them out of their comfort zones.
:'''Amethyst''': I dunno, man. Comfortable can be good too.
:'''Steven''': Bear with me for a sec. ''[to Larimar and Snowflake Obsidian]'' Hey, guys, I was wondering what you two did on Homeworld.
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': I dug ice trenches for their armies.
:'''Larimar''': I made ice sculptures for the Diamonds.
:'''Steven''': So ice is kind of like your default mode?
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': ''[exchanges looks with Larimar]'' Yes.
:'''Steven''': Did you ever think of trying something else?
:'''Snowflake Obsidian''': Like filling ice trenches?
:'''Steven''': ''[as he sees Nephrite flying overhead]'' Well, how would you like to fly a plane?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I had an idea for you, Larimar. You could operate the Funland rollercoaster! It's a great job, and you get to help people have fun.
:'''Larimar''': What is this wonderful noise?
:'''Steven''': Those are the joyful screams of people on a rollercoaster.
:'''Larimar''': Human screams are my favorite of the Earth's delights! I want to hear the human screams forever.
:'''Steven''': Okay, that's kind of troubling... but your heart's in the right place.
:'''Larimar''': One day, I'll make ''you'' scream, Steven.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Larimar''': I just wanted to say thanks for the amusement park job. I'm not great at the roller-coaster operation, we know, but I found out I'm good at handing out prizes to children, and I love their laughter.
:'''Steven''': Aww.
:'''Larimar''': It sounds just like screaming.

===''Rose Buds''===
:'''Holly Blue Agate''': Stop relaxing and get back to your posts! Ugh! How can you stand this total lack of order?
:'''Amethyst Guard''': Chill out, Holly Blue. You know you want to.
:'''Holly Blue Agate''' I give up. No one answers to me, and I answer to no one. I'd give anything for an order from the Diamonds, but all they talk about is Steven, Steven, Steven-- ''[sees him]'' Steven!
:'''Steven''': Hi, Holly.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[seeing all of the Rose Quartzes being un-bubbled]'' So... Many... Rose Quartzes. How did the--
:'''Superfan Rose''': Oh, now that it's Era 3, we were all unbubbled, so now, we're making up for lost time. Hi! I'm Rose Quartz, and you, you're Steven! You are so much smaller than I imagined! Is it because you're half organic? Can you believe it, Rose Quartz?!
:'''Hippie Rose''': It's like, we where bubbled, but now we're like, not bubbled.
:'''Steven''': Th-It's really-- It's really great.

===''Volleyball''===
:'''Steven''': So, how would you like your magical spit administered today?
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': ''[with her neck extended and her gem cracked]'' Ah, geez, uh... the ''not'' kissing one?
:'''Steven''': You got it! ''[licks his palm and applies healing spit onto the Ruby's gem, healing the crack]'' Man, what kind of enemies does the mayor have to keep you landing in my office?
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': That's classified information, nurse-citizen Universe.
:'''Steven''': Okay, well, try not to classify too hard out there. Oh, don't forget your lollipop.
:'''Ruby Bodyguard''': Yeah!
:'''Steven''': Next patient, please. ''[sees five Quartzes entering all with cracked gems and physical deformities]'' Uh… volleyball must have gotten really wild, huh? ''[heals the Quartzes and bids them all farewell]'' Come again! Just, like, not too soon. And remember, volleyball ''isn't'' a contact sport!
:'''Pink Pearl''': Excuse me?
:'''Steven''': Oh, it's you!
:'''Pink Pearl''': I heard you might be able to help me with this. ''[points at her cracked eye]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Hmm, I'm sorry if it's a sore subject, but can you remember anything that happened while you were under White Diamond's control?
:'''Pink Pearl''': Nope! 8,000 years just, blip, gone!
:'''Steven''': So, you must not remember getting this crack in the first place.
:'''Pink Pearl''': Oh, no, no. This is from before.
:'''Steven''': White hurt you before she controlled you?
:'''Pink Pearl''': What? Oh, stars! What a misunderstanding. This is all Pink Diamond.
:'''Steven''': My mom?! ''[tenses up, briefly turning pink, quickly notices, and shakes]'' Sorry! It's just baggage.
:'''Pink Pearl''': Is everything... all right?
:'''Steven''': Yep, but this is not about me! We're gonna get you fixed up, and I know just the Pearl to help us!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[On Pink Pearl's cracked face]''
:'''Pearl''': How could White be so careless?  
:'''Pink Pearl''': ''[chuckling]'' Oh, no, Pearl. You've got it all wrong. Pink did this.
:'''Pearl''': ''[shocked]'' What did you say? ''[approaches her]'' 
:'''Steven''': Pearl, no...!  
:'''Pink Pearl''': It's a funny story, really. Once, Pink got tired of asking Yellow and Blue for her own colony, so she went straight to White. Of course, White told her she wasn't fit to run one, and, well, that set her off. 
:'''Pearl''': &quot;Set her off&quot;? What are you talking about?  
:'''Pink Pearl''': You remember how she was, with her destructive powers, throwing tantrums left and right. She had a scream that could crack the walls. She didn't mean to hurt me. ''[chuckles]'' I just happened to be standing too close to her that time, and--  
:'''Steven''': ''[covering his ears anxiously]'' Doesn't matter! I'm gonna fix it!  
:'''Pearl''': Destructive powers?! Pink didn't have destructive powers, she was a healer! She didn't throw tantrums, she kept her feelings secret!
:'''Pink Pearl''': The Pink I knew couldn't keep a secret to save her gem.  
:'''Pearl''': Are you kidding?! If anything, she was ''too'' good at keeping secrets, even from me!
:''[Frustrated by their arguing, Steven furiously snaps and starts glowing pink]''
:'''Steven''': ''[lividly]'' ''STOP IT!'' I CAN'T DEAL WITH ''ONE MORE'' HORRIBLE THING SHE DID, OKAY?! ''[Both Pearls gasp]'' I DON'T WANNA HEAR ABOUT IT, I DON'T EVEN WANNA ''THINK'' ABOUT IT!
:'''Pearl''': Steven!
:'''Steven''': I JUST WANT TO '''''FIX IT!!!'''''
:''[Steven unleashes a shockwave that causes cracks around the room. Pink Pearl cowers in fear, and Steven looks at his own reflection in shock and remorse]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pearl''': I'm sorry for not believing you. It looks like I'm still making excuses for her. 
:'''Pink Pearl''': ''[tearfully]'' Is that what ''I've'' been doing?! But... she didn't mean to! 
:'''Pearl''': But you were hurt! Badly hurt! 
:'''Pink Pearl''': I was badly hurt... How did ''you'' stop hurting? 
:'''Pearl''': ''[embraces her tightly]'' I didn't.
:''[Pink Pearl returns the hug, and they fuse into Mega Pearl]''
:'''Steven''': You fused!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I'm so sorry. The whole trip was for nothing. 
:'''Mega Pearl''': No, it wasn't for nothing. Your mother's Pearls never had the whole picture. One knew your mother was trying to change, but she couldn't understand why. The other never expected her to change at all. Now, I get to understand everything. Now, they finally get to have each other.
:''[She separates into the two Pearls, peacefully holding hands]''

===''Bluebird''===
:''[Greg is in the bathroom, brushing his hair, until Steven and the Gems enter for an emergency meeting]''
:'''Steven''': Don't panic. I think Bluebird is a fusion of Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot;!
:'''Amethyst''': Well, duh.
:'''Garnet''': It's pretty obvious.
:'''Steven''': What?! Well, how come you're all so calm about this?! Did you forget that Aquamarine kidnapped me? How about the fact that &quot;Eyeball&quot; tried to stab me (while we were stuck in space) and ratted me out while I was on trial? They must've fused because they both hate me!
:'''Garnet''': That was them. This is Bluebird.
:'''Steven''': But she pranked me earlier today! She put a sign on my back that said I... smelled good, switched my juice with tomato soup, neatly stack toilet paper... on top of my car?
:'''Pearl''': None of that stuff sounds particularly malicious.
:'''Amethyst''': Besides, don't you like tomato soup?
:'''Steven''': Yeah, but isn't it convenient that Bluebird just showed up here at my house?
:'''Pearl''': Steven, you've literally invited all problematic Gems from across the universe to come here and learn a better way of living.
:'''Steven''': Well, right.
:'''Greg''': Listen, Schtu-ball, if you don't want this Gem around, that's totally fair.
:'''Steven''': No, you guys are right. Everyone deserves a chance to change.
:'''Garnet''': Don't worry. If she tries anything funny, we'll be there to squash her.
:'''Steven''': Thanks, Garnet.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[after Greg breaks free of himself by using &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby's chisel knife to cut off his hair]'' Father, go inside. ''[Greg does so; turns pink, angrily to &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby and Aquamarine]'' I WON'T LET YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Tsk, tsk, tsk. You guys fused just because you hate me, didn't you?
:'''Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': Yes!
:'''Steven''': If that's the only reason, then it's no wonder you can't keep it together.
:'''Aquamarine''': What are you talking about?
:'''Steven''': There are so many other reasons to fuse, like friendship and responsibility and... and love. Imagine how much better it would feel to fuse to support each other, instead of tearing someone down. Your life would fill with warmth and friendship and joy and love and--
:'''&quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': ''[covering her ears; agitated]'' Wowie, wow! He is ''so'' annoying!
:'''Aquamarine''': ''[also agitated]'' I hate him so much!
:'''Aquamarine and &quot;Eyeball&quot; Ruby''': I know! Me too! ''[they fuse back into Bluebird]''
:'''Steven''': ''[annoyed]'' Are you kidding me?
:'''Bluebird''': At last!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I'm really sorry, Dad. I never should have given Bluebird a chance.
:'''Greg''': I love how you believe in everyone. You stuck to your principles, and I'm proud of you. I mean, everyone can change, but not everyone wants to.

===''A Very Special Episode''===
:''[Rainbow Quartz 2.0 unfuses and Steven answers the call]''
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you're late. I need you for the Sunstone safety Geminar. 
:'''Steven''': ARGH!
:'''Garnet''': Don't worry, ''I'll'' handle the geminar. I'll explain to them every possible future where they get hurt in this house.
:'''Steven''': I don't know if that's a good idea. I'll be right there.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Ocean Jasper''': I slip on the stairs?
:'''Garnet''': Yes. You shatter on impact.
:''[Ocean Jasper, Earth and Heaven Beetle, and a Nephrite scream]''
:'''Steven''': ''[enters through the door]'' Garnet, I'm here.
:'''Garnet''': Steven, help. I think I'm scaring them.
:'''Steven''': It's okay. We got this. Let's get this safety Geminar started with a very special guest speaker.
:''[They both dance and fuse into Sunstone]''
:'''Sunstone''': Your rockin' pal Sunstone's here to shine.
:'''Ocean Jasper''': Watch out, Sunstone. It's dangerous in here.
:'''Sunstone''': Not if you practice home safety. Don't slip up. Clear objects off the stairs. Foul shot! Make sure you cover your trash, or you might attract wild animals. Come on. Let's go! Don't leave the water running, it could flood your house. Put protective covers on electrical outlets, especially when kids are around. And most importantly, turn off motion smoothing on your TV.
:'''Ocean Jasper''': Wow, everything looks so much better!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Steven receives a call from Pearl, who he left to take care of Onion]''
:'''Steven''': ''[exhausted]'' Please, please have everything under control...  
:'''Pearl''': STEVEN! EVERYTHING IS OUT OF CONTROL!
:'''Steven''': Yup...
:'''Pearl''': It's getting really weird here! Steven, you were never like this, you were such a good kid! I'm so sorry I never told you that! Aah! I... I can hear him, but I can't see him! I think he's in the walls! I don't know how he got there, and I don't know how to get him out! ''[call ends]''
:'''Steven''': ''[long gasp]'' Garnet, can you handle things on your own for a little bit?  
:'''Garnet''': No problem. Our students love me. ''[walks over to them]'' Let me tell you all the ways you can get hit by a car.  
:'''Steven''': Agh, Garnet! Forget it. I'll stay. I'll stay!  
:'''Pearl''': ''[in another call]'' STEVEN, THERE'S A SNAKE!
:'''Steven''': Never mind!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rainbow Quartz 2.0''': Why play with sharp objects when you can play with my sharp wit? Crack jokes, not cookie jars, as I always say. Ha ha!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Garnet''': It's important to keep in mind that all these horrible things ''did'' happen to you in alternate timelines. Safety is fun.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Onion has led Garnet's students off a cliff]''
:'''Pearl''': Oh, no!
:'''Garnet''': Steven, quick! Sunstone can save them!
:'''Steven''': Okay... ''[they fuse into Sunstone]'' 
:'''Sunstone''': Oh, yeah!
:'''Pearl''': No! Let Rainbow save them! ''[fuses with Steven]''  
:'''Rainbow Quartz 2.0''': ''[showing his umbrella]'' I'll catch them with this!  
:'''Amethyst''': ''[rushing in]'' Hey, wait! ''I'' need Steven!
:'''Steven''' ''[unfuses from Pearl]'' What is it, Amethyst?  
:'''Amethyst''': I just miss you, man! I haven't seen you for, like, eleven minutes!

===''Snow Day''===
:''[One snowy morning, Steven wakes up and stretches, trying to get ready for his busy day and run some errands]''
:'''Amethyst''': ''[entering the kitchen with fried eggs for eyes]'' You really gonna skip the most egg-ssential meal of the day?
:'''Steven''': Of course not. I've got all my morning nutrients in this protein shake.
:'''Amethyst''': ''[pokes yolk to leak]'' Dude, you're making me sad.
:'''Garnet''': Steven. I packed everything you're gonna need for today in your cheeseburger backpack.
:'''Steven''': Oh, uh, I don't really use that anymore. Besides, I packed my own bag.
:'''Garnet''': At least pet this cat.
:'''Cat Steven''': ''[popping out of the backpack]'' Meow.
:'''Steven''': Why was I going to need... ''[sighs]'' Never mind. Got to go.
:'''Pearl''': Hold it. According to my weather application, it's going to snow all day and overnight. You're going to freeze if you don't put on a puffer, a hat, and two scarves. Better make it three.
:'''Steven''': ''[muffling in denial]'' Pearl, I need to get going!
:'''Pearl''': But classes don't start for another couple of hours.
:'''Garnet''': Wait for us. We can head over together.
:'''Amethyst''': Why are you taking the old Dondai anyway? We have the warp technology.
:'''Steven''': It's because I've got errands to run in town before classes start.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[after returning home from his errands]'' Hey, guys.
:'''Amethyst''': Guess what we've got lined up tonight. &quot;Pupcopter's Sky-High Adventure&quot;!
:'''Pearl''': Sheet masks with cute animal faces!
:'''Garnet''': And, most importantly, pizza.
:'''Steven''': Guys, I've been a vegetarian for like, a month, and &quot;Pupcopter&quot; is for 6-year-olds, and I have my own skin care routine. Anyways, it's cool. I already ate. ''[walks upstairs]''
:'''Amethyst''': Oh, well. We'll just watch the movie with Cat Steven.
:'''Garnet''': My bad. I was sure we were in the pepperoni timeline.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Man, you had a better work-life balance when the Diamonds were trying to destroy the planet.
:'''Steven''': That was then. This is now.
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, you know what we haven't done in a long time? ''[shapeshifts into 14-year-old Steven]'' Steven Tag!
:'''Steven''': Amethyst, what the heck?!
:'''Amethyst''': You know the rules, buster. You get tagged, you have to turn into Steven.
:'''Steven''': But I'm already Steven!
:'''Amethyst''': Nah, bruh. ''Classic'' Steven.
:'''Steven''': ''Classic Steven?!''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Pearl''': Steven, what are you doing?
:'''Steven''': Pearl!
:'''Pearl''': Has cabin fever taken hold already?
:'''Steven''': It's Amethyst and Garnet! They're playing Steven Tag to mess with me!
:'''Pearl''': Steven Tag? Wow, that takes me back. Well, I'm sure they… ''[gets tagged by Garnet and falls on her knees to the floor]''
:'''Steven''': Ha! Joke's on you! Pearl doesn't shapeshift! ''[Pearl starts to glow]'' Huh?
:'''Pearl''': ''[shapeshifts into 14-year-old Steven]'' The power of Steven Tag COMPELS ME!
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckles]'' Wow. Good for her.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[shivering]'' They'll never stop until they make me play. ''[Alexandrite, in the form of 14-year-old Steven, appears behind him]'' Oh, jeez. ''[screams as Alexandrite blasts fire at him with her second mouth, but protects himself with his bubble shield]'' I really didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice. I ''JOIN'' THE GAME!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You shouldn't have messed with me. Huh? ''[gets tagged by Sapphire]''
:'''Sapphire''': Tag.
:'''Steven''': ''[falls off the lighthouse]'' Oh, no. Is this the end of my adult life?

===''Why So Blue?''===
:'''Steven''' You're right. This is harder than usual.  
:'''Lapis''': You've just got to force them to stop. This is going to be a fight. They're not nice like me.  
:'''Steven''': Umm...  
:'''Lapis''': Exactly.  
:'''Steven''': They just don't understand that they're doing harm. Y-you get it. What made it click for you?  
:'''Lapis''': ''A cycle of horrible torture.'' ''[smiling]'' But other than that, living in nature, getting creative.
:'''Steven''': Yeah! Come on, we can do that for them.  
:'''Lapis''': Okay. Just a little torture.  
:'''Steven''': N-no, just the other stuff. 
:'''Lapis''': ''[sighs]'' Fine, we'll try it your way.
:''[They head back to the two Lapis Lazulis]'' 
:'''Steven''': Hey, so, why don't we explore the many things that you can do that don't involve destroying worlds?  
:'''&quot;Mean&quot; Lapis''': Should we listen to him?  
:'''&quot;Nice&quot; Lapis''': He ''is'' half-Diamond. Maybe we should half-listen?  
:'''Steven''': I'll take that as a &quot;yes.&quot; Let's go.

===''Little Graduation''===
:'''Lars''': ''[about Shep]'' Say hi to them for me.

===''Prickly Pair''===
:'''Cactus Steven''': I can't tell Pearl how I feel, 'cause she'd blame herself! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cactus Steven''': I can't hear any more high and mighty advice from Garnet! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cactus Steven''': I'm so sick of Amethyst acting like she's so mature now!
:'''Amethyst''': Why's it being so weirdly specific?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Hey, dude?
:'''Pearl''': Is there anything you need to talk about?
:'''Steven''': ''[softly]'' ... I think I've said enough.

===''In Dreams''===
:''[After Steven and Peridot have watched the'' Camp Pining Hearts ''reboot]''
:'''Steven''': Wha…? Wha…?!
:'''Steven and Peridot''': '''''WHAT HAVE THEY DONE?!?!?'''''  
:'''Peridot''': What is with this Rodrigo guy?! He has no charisma!  
:'''Steven''': And can we talk about this cinematography?!  
:'''Peridot''': GAAAH, THEY'VE CHANGED ''ALL'' THE CHARACTERS, AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANY OF THEM! ''[grabs the television]'' HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! ''[sobs] Camp Pining Hearts'' helped me escape when everything around me was in chaos...  
:'''Steven''': ''CPH'' brought us together... 
:'''Peridot''': And now, LOOK AT THIS NIGHTMARE! ''[the TV suddenly shows Steven's dream]'' Steven?! You didn't tell me that they cast you!  
:'''Steven''': What?! They didn't. I-Is this... my dream from last night? ''[on the TV, after Steven falls and the dream ends, it goes back to'' Camp Pining Hearts ''again]'' Whoa! My- My powers must be interfering with the TV signal!  
:'''Peridot''': ''[delighted]'' Steven! Do you know what this means?!  
:'''Steven''': I have to start wearing a tinfoil hat?  
:'''Peridot''': No! It means that if we can put your dreams on the television, we can reboot the reboot!  
:'''Steven''': &quot;Reboot the...?&quot; Peridot, you're a genius!  
:'''Peridot''': I know.
:'''Steven''': And, well, it might be fun to fix something that isn't the entire universe.  
:'''Peridot''': ''[grabs him with one arm]'' This is going to be the beginning of Peridot and Steven Productions!  
:'''Steven''': Yeah-- whoa! ''[topples onto her]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': Peridot! We've always had something to fix together - the Cluster, the Diamonds, or Spinel! I don't think I know how to be a friend without something to fix! But I... I just can't do it anymore! I'm so tired... Now I'm even doing it in my dreams! I'm sorry, I can't do this for you. Please don't leave! Don't... leave!
:''[The dream stops, in the manner of a TV turning off; Steven awakens, in tears, to Peridot's concerned voice]''
:'''Peridot''': Steven? Steven! STEVEN! Steven, I saw everything! It's-- It's fine! We don't have to do this anymore. ''[hugs him and starts tearing up]'' I don't care about the show, and I ''definitely'' don't care about Rodrigo! Hrrrgh, I'm such a clod!
:'''Steven''': But I really wanted to spend time with you! I just... wanted an excuse to hang out.
:'''Peridot''': We don't need an excuse to hang out.
:'''Steven''': Can... we still watch ''CPH'' together? Even if it sucks?
:'''Peridot''': ''[removes her visor to wipe her eyes, and smiles]'' Of course.
:''[Later, they watch the show]''
:'''Jasmine''': ''[in the show, angrily]'' How could you lie to me like that, Rodrigo?! I guess you just can't help being a bad person!
:''[Steven and Peridot laugh]''
:'''Peridot''': Jasmine, you just ''buried a body in the woods'', and now you're mad that Rodrigo cheated at ''cards?!''
:''[They laugh again]''
:'''Peridot''': This show is the worst!
:'''Steven''': ''[smiling warmly at her]'' This show is the best.

===''Bismuth Casual''===
:''[At the Starlight Roller Rink]''
:'''Bismuth''': Woooow! So you mean to tell me people pay to have wheels strapped to their feet for fun? That is really something else.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Patricia''': You should have seen Daniel earlier. He was all bent out of shape 'cos his mom tore into him over his last test scores!
:'''Daniel''': ''[groans]'' You know, I kind of forgot about it for a sec.
:'''Steven''': Heh... I know how that is. One time, White Diamond tore into me... literally! ''[laughs awkwardly]'' She, uh, she took my gem - I'm part Gem, by the way - she pulled it right out of my body.
:'''Daniel''': Okay...?
:'''Patricia''': So what grade are you in, Steven?
:'''Steven''': Grade? Err, uh... sixteen?
:'''Patricia''': ''[laughs]''
:'''Daniel''': So you're taking AP classes?
:'''Steven''': Uh...
:'''Connie''': Y'all ready to skate?
:'''Patricia''': Heck, yeah!
:''[Connie, Patricia and Daniel skate away]''
:'''Steven''': I really blew that one. Bet if they were enemy Gems, we'd be best friends by now.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Pearl forms a roll of toilet paper from her gem and gives it to Bismuth]''
:'''Pearl''': Oh, here, take this. Every human has at least one of these in their homes. Sometimes they even use it ''[secretively]'' for vandalism! Good luck out there! ''[starts skating away]''
:'''Bismuth''': Wait, where are you going?
:'''Pearl''': You don't need me anymore, Bismuth - the humans already love you! I'm going to make some new connections of my own! ''[to a random skater]'' Hello, fellow skater! Would you like a fresh roll? ''[forms another roll]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': When Connie and I were fighting to save the universe, things were sort of easier. We were fighting the same fight. Now it's like we're living different lives. I wonder if I'm even her best friend anymore...
:'''Bismuth''': ''[pounds the table firmly]'' How long has this been going on?
:'''Steven''': Err... couple of months.
:'''Bismuth''': Listen, Steven. Pearl brought me here to set me up with her friends, but Connie came here to be with ''you.'' You've got nothing to mope about.
:'''Steven''': But her friends think I'm weird.
:'''Bismuth''': Of course you're weird! You're a Crystal Gem! Connie knows that, she's always known that! That never stopped you from being friends!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Steven collapses in the rink]''
:'''Connie''': Steven! Are you okay?
:'''Steven''': Connie, I'm sorry... I don't wanna hold you back.
:'''Connie''': I don't mind.
:'''Steven''': You've got school, new friends, you're going places and... I'm happy for you. But I feel like you're drifting away from me. I wish we could reconnect, but... BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SKATE!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Steven and Connie win the skating contest as Stevonnie]''
:'''Patricia''': Steven, Connie, that was amazing!
:'''Daniel''': What the heck was that out there?
:'''Connie''': Oh, fusion? Yeah, that's kind of our thing.
:'''Steven''': It's something I picked up from my mom's side of the family.
:'''Daniel''': The only thing I get from my mom's side of the family is ''stressed out.''
:'''Steven''': ''[chuckles]'' Same...

===''Together Forever''===
:''[After Connie turns down Steven's proposal]''
:'''Steven''': I don't get it. Ruby and Sapphire said I should go for it.  
:'''Garnet''': You can't trust love advice from those two hopeless romantics.  
:'''Steven''': Then why didn't you stop me?  
:'''Garnet''': There was no future where you didn't propose to Connie.  
:'''Steven''': Of course...
:'''Garnet''': ''[hugs him]'' Your soulmate is your complement, not your missing piece. Ruby and Sapphire love being together, but they each have their own individual lives. Whatever hole there is in your life, Steven, I want you to understand that Connie-Stevonnie won't be able to fill it.

===''Growing Pains''===
:'''Priyanka''': Steven, do you remember anything bad in your childhood that particularly stuck with you?
:'''Steven''': I guess… I kind of freaked out when they [[w:Gem Glow|cancelled my favorite ice cream]]. And then I got attacked by a giant bug monster. And I got trapped in a bubble and almost drowned. I lost control of my body and turned into a blob of cats. I almost turned so old I died. Amethyst almost died. Pearl [[w:Steven the Sword Fighter|''did'' die]]. Garnet got destabilized right in front of me. I woke up with a black eye, [[w:Jail Break (Steven Universe)|imprisoned on a spaceship]]--
:'''Priyanka''': Steven, this is serious!
:'''Steven''': But that was just the early stuff.
:'''Priyanka''': I think all these experiences have been subjecting your body to a harmful amount of stress, and that's affecting your ability to respond to new forms of stress in a healthy way. You've been dealing with genuine threats from such a young age, your body is now responding to minor threats as if your life were in danger.
:'''Steven''': But, why am I only swelling up now?
:'''Priyanka''': Stress is less harmful when we have people we trust to help us through it. Maybe if... if you're losing your supportive relationships, or if you have a recent experience that was particularly awf--
:''[Steven remembers his failed proposal to Connie, and immediately starts stressing and swelling up]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Greg''': Come on, Steven, talk to me.
:'''Steven''': ''[tearing up]'' I... well... I, um... I proposed to Connie!
:'''Greg''': You what?!
:'''Steven''': She said no.
:'''Greg''': Oh, Steven...
:'''Steven''': My body... it's reacting like it's the end of the world. I think I've seen the world almost end so many times now that ''everything'' that goes wrong feels that... that extreme! I should be feeling so good these days! The Earth is safe, it's Era 3... But I'm swelling up over these third era problems! What do I do? How do I move on from all the stuff I've been through? How do I live life if it always feels like I'm about to die?!
:'''Greg''': It's gonna be all right, Stewball. I'm here for you.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': I guess I thought I could just follow Connie to college, like if we got married I'd know what to do with myself. But I'm the one that's gotta figure that stuff out.
:'''Greg''': Cut yourself some slack! It's okay to be worried and make some mistakes when you're figuring out what to do with your life. That's not unusual. Uh, well, the magic swelling is a little unusual, but that's okay too! If you want to be a giant boy, we can use the car wash as a shower.

=== ''Mr. Universe'' ===
:'''Steven''': I don't need this song! I need...I need what you had!
:'''Greg''': What?
:'''Steven''': I wish I could've grown up at a house like that.
:'''Greg''': No you don't!
:'''Steven''': Maybe your parents weren't so bad. Maybe they gave you curfews and chaperones and meatloaf f-for a reason!
:'''Greg''': Steven, you don't know what they were like!
:'''Steven''': They can't be worse then mom's family. I went halfway across the galaxy for them, and this was right here?!
:'''Greg''': Steven, I couldn't do anything growing up. Everything I liked, or wore, wanted was always wrong! Trust me, you're better off then I was.
:'''Steven''': I can't believe I never realized, you're... you're just like Mom! ''[turns pink as his grip tightens on the steering wheel]''
:'''Greg''': You grew up with actual freedom!
:'''Steven''': I grew up in a ''van!'' I never went to school! I've never been to the doctor until two days ago!
:'''Greg''': Steven! You're a gem! You're not like other kids!
:'''Steven''': I could have done all that stuff! My problem isn't that I'm a gem, my problem is that I'm a ''UNIVERSE!!''

===''Fragments''===
:'''Pearl''': How could this happen? You crashed the van with Greg inside? You know how fragile he is, these pink outbursts of yours are getting out of hand.
:'''Steven''': It's not an ''OUTBURST! [turns pink and swells up]''
:'''Pearl''': See? This is exactly what I'm talking about! What's happening to you?
:'''Steven''': Nothing! ...It's nothing.
:'''Pearl''': S-Steven! Where are you going?! We're not pro- ''[Steven summons out a generated force field]'' Steven! Drop this wall!
:'''Steven''': Pearl, sorry. I'm trying- I just… need… some space, OK? I'll be in my room.
:'''Amethyst''': Not so fast, my dude. You gotta tell us what's going on.
:'''Garnet''': It looks like Steven is trying to avoid a serious discussion about this ''all'' together.
:'''Steven''': '''NO, I'M''' &lt;big&gt;'''NOT!!!'''&lt;/big&gt; ''[slams his fist into the stairs in rage, unleashing a room-wrecking shockwave]''
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you have got to calm down and talk to us!
:'''Amethyst''': Just chill, man!
:'''Steven''': Nnghh…
:'''Pearl''': We need to do something about this before someone gets hurt!
:'''Steven''': NNGGHH…
:'''Garnet''': Don't let this power control you. You're better than this.
:'''Steven''': NNGGHH… &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt; ''[notices the Gems are walking in slow-motion]'' I'm…speeding up again. I gotta get out of here.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': This thing with my powers is a real problem!
:'''Jasper''': The only problem you have are your friends.
:'''Steven''': Huh?
:'''Jasper''': Can't you see they're holding you back?
:'''Steven''': What? No, they're-- they're just worried about me.
:'''Jasper''': They're afraid. Of your power.
:'''Steven''': Yeah... yeah, I guess so...
:'''Jasper''': You are too. You came all the way out here to hide from it. But ''I'm'' not here to hide. I don't stifle my anger or my power; I channel it into training!
:'''Steven''': Oh, right... this destroyed forest.
:'''Jasper''': I've got no one to serve, nowhere to go. All I have left is '''''POWER!''' [she punches a tree, completely smashing it apart]'' And in order to control that power, I have to ''use'' it. Those so-called &quot;friends&quot; of yours don't understand. They want you to feel bad for being yourself.
:'''Steven''': I ''do'' feel bad… ''[steps over to another tree and punches it, cringing in pain and remorse]''
:'''Jasper''': YEAH, DESTROY THAT WEAKLING TREE!
:'''Steven''': No! ''[kisses the tree, healing it and making grass sprout around it]''
:'''Jasper''': Ugh! Gross! That's disgusting! Bleh! No! The grass! ''[tears at it]'' Get outta here! ''[grabs Steven]'' Quit helping the local ecosystem recover!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[On Steven's new, more muscular form]''
:'''Jasper''': Hm. Not bad for three days of work. ''[Steven kisses one of his biceps]'' I didn't teach you that…

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jasper''': What are you holding back for?! You think I can't take it? I'm not gonna coddle you, Steven! Do you wanna go home to your Gems?
:'''Steven''': No…
:'''Jasper''': Are you afraid to be strong? Are you pathetic? Are you ''weak?''
:'''Steven''': &lt;big&gt;'''''I'M NOT!!!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': You're right, Jasper… I ''have'' been holding back.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Having shattered Jasper after losing control in their rematch, Steven hurries back to his bathroom and dips the fragments into Diamond aura potions]''
:'''Steven''': Please, please let this work! ''[crying]'' Jasper, I'm sorry. Please… come back. ''[his tears add Pink's aura to the mix]'' Please…
:''[After a while, Jasper's gem glows and heals, and she reforms]''
:'''Jasper''': ''[panting]'' Huh? What? You... ''shattered'' me?
:'''Steven''': Jasper! I-I'm so sorry, I should have stopped! I-I just wasn't thinking!  
:'''Jasper''': ''[steps out of the bathtub and bows on one knee]'' I bow to your strength… ''my Diamond.''  
:'''Steven''': ''[horrified]'' No...!

===''Homeworld Bound''===
:'''Pearl''': ''[knocks on the bathroom door]'' Steven?
:'''Amethyst''': What's going on in there? ''[Jasper emerges]'' Jasper?!
:'''Pearl''': What are you-?
:'''Amethyst''': Where's Steven?!
:'''Jasper''': Right here. ''[steps aside, revealing him looking scared and depressed]''
:'''Amethyst''': Steven? Where have you been?!
:''[Steven walks off upstairs to his conservatory]''
:'''Pearl''': You can't just disappear for days without telling us!
:'''Jasper''': My Diamond can do as he pleases.
:'''Amethyst''': Wait, what?!
:'''Pearl''': Why are you calling him that?!
:'''Garnet''': Steven!
:'''Pearl''': Where is he going?!
:''[The Gems follow Steven to his conservatory]''
:'''Pearl''': Steven, wait!
:'''Garnet''': You don't need to go.
:''[Steven turns pink and puts a barrier in front of the Gems and Jasper as he sighs]''
:'''Amethyst''': What the HECK?!
:'''Steven''': You guys… I love you, but you ''can't'' help me anymore. I've been avoiding the only people in the entire universe who can. Please, don't follow me. You too, Jasper. Find something better to do with your life.
:'''Garnet''': Steven! Remember, we'll always be your family.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spinel''': STEVEN! ''[grabs him and kisses him]''
:'''Steven''': ''[turning pink]'' Spinel, what is wrong with you?!
:'''Spinel''': Oh, y'know, the usual.
:'''Steven''': ''[turning back to normal]'' So, how've you been since, err...?
:'''Spinel''': Since I tried to kill you? That was so embarrassing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[controlling White Diamond]'' Whoa. This is… so weird. I'm-I'm, I'm a Diamond. This- This is the last thing I needed to see! ''[angrily]'' I don't wanna be you! I don't wanna be anything like you! Why won't you just go '''AWAY?!''' ''[punches a pillar]'' Don't hurt me! She can't hurt me. I'm controlling her. So why am I so afraid? ''[remembers the memory of White pulling his gemstone out of his navel; scowls darkly] '''She's''''' the one who should be afraid.
:'''White Diamond''': ''[talking in Steven's voice]'' What's- what's going on? ''[Steven starts controlling her like a puppet]'' What? No, stop it. I don't like this!
:'''Steven''': Too bad. ''[force controls her by walking her to a pillar]''
:'''White Diamond''': Let me go! ''[grabs hold of the pillar]'' Please! You're scaring me!
:'''Steven''': This is for '''''everything''''' you put me through! ''[forces White Diamond to slam her head into the pillar, in an attempt to shatter her gemstone, instead, snaps them out of it and hits his own head, allowing White Diamond to regain her control again]''
:'''White Diamond''': ''[breathing; horrified]'' What… what ''was'' that?!
:'''Steven''': I-I don't know.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Spinel''': Hey, buddy, where you going?
:'''Steven''': Wait a second - ''you'' used to have vengeful thoughts!
:'''Spinel''': ''[awkwardly]'' Ooooh, yeah... but I don't get 'em anymore.
:'''Steven''': How did you make them stop?
:'''Spinel''': I met a little someone named Steven Universe! And he told me: ''[singing]'' [[w:Steven Universe: The Movie|I–I–I–I–I–I, I can make a chaaaaange! You can make a promise...]]
:'''Steven''': Gah! Don't give me my own advice!

===''Everything's Fine''===
:'''Steven''': Hey, Connie, what's up?
:'''Connie''': Steven! Good, you finally picked up! I can't believe we haven't spoken since the hospital. How are you?
:'''Steven''': I'm great! Never been better!
:'''Connie''': Really? Have you had any more issues with swelling and glowing pink?
:'''Steven''': Um... Nope? Well, maybe, but how about you? How's college prep?
:'''Connie''': Steven, that's, uh- It's fine, but what do you mean, maybe?
:'''Steven''': Look, there's nothing to worry about. I'm OK.
:'''Connie''': Steven...
:'''Steven''': I should go. I don't wanna wake up the Gems.
:'''Connie''': But they don't even sleep!
:'''Steven''': Uh, bye!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[While trying to help in Bismuth's workshop]''
:'''Steven''': Ooh, look at that. Now you have ''two'' anvils.
:'''Bismuth''': Noooo! My anvil! My beautiful anvil!
:'''Steven''': Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, my work here is done. Well, toodles!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Connie''': Steven!
:'''Steven''': Huh?
:'''Connie''': I knew it! You ''are'' swelling and glowing again. I've been trying to call you, but I came as soon as I saw this. ''[holds out her phone, on which Steven, glowing and swelled up, is doing the plant Steven's dance and looping the message &quot;Steven's here to help!&quot;]'' What is going on?
:'''Steven''': I... broadcast my subconscious sometimes these days. It's really no big deal.
:'''Connie''': Okay, but... I can tell something is bothering you. ''[holds out her phone again; the message makes some statics]''
:'''Steven''': Ah, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine! Awesome, in fact. Come on, you've seen me when I wasn't doing well.
:'''Greg''': Steven, if being like this is what you want, then we'll support you one hundred percent. Whatever makes you happy. But, if you're not happy, if something's wrong-
:'''Steven''': Nothing's wrong! Besides, I don't want you to worry.
:'''Connie''': We ''are'' worried!
:'''Greg''': Steven, you know you can tell us anything.
:'''Steven''': It's not that easy! You know what? I don't have to deal with this! ''[walks towards the door, but Amethyst, Pearl, and Connie block his way]''
:'''Amethyst''': Hold up, dude.
:'''Garnet''': Steven, you need to stop running.
:'''Greg''': Please.
:''[Steven starts groaning in frustration, his head briefly swelling out of shape]''
:'''Connie''': Steven, we should get you back to the hospital.
:'''Amethyst and Pearl''': HOSPITAL?!
:'''Pearl''': When were you in the hospital?!
:'''Connie''': You didn't tell them?!
:'''Steven''': 	''[becoming hysterical, starting to laugh uneasily]'' It wasn't that important, you guys! You're making a big deal out of nothing. Have I done some things wrong? Sure! I trashed the house today, I broke an anvil - what teenager hasn't? Dad and I had a little disagreement, but that's practically a rite of passage! I mean, it would be weird if we didn't, right? And ''maybe'' I've had a not-so-nice thought or two about, like, you know, slamming White Diamond's head through a pillar, but it's not like I actually went through with it! I only ''actually'' shattered Jasper!
:''[Pearl gasps in horrified shock]''
:'''Amethyst''': WHAT?!
:''[Garnet, Connie, and Greg all gasp in horror]''
:'''Connie''': You're- you're joking, right?
:'''Steven''': Oh, don't worry! I fixed that too! I can fix ''anything!'' I can just keep messing up and fixing things forever, and you'll never have to know or think about any of it!
:'''Garnet''': Steven...
:'''Steven''': ''[sighs; finally loses it]'' How messed up is that? That I've gotten away with this for so long? You have ''no'' idea how bad I am! Y-You think I'm so great, and I'm so mature, and I always know what to do! But ''that's'' not true! I haven't learned a thing from my problems! They've all just made me worse! You all think of me as some angel, but I'm not that kid anymore! ''[scowls]'' I'm a fraud. ''[falls to the floor; breathing shakily]'' I'm a fraud. I'm a MONSTER! ''[massive pink spikes burst out of his back, tearing his shirt with everyone taking  a step back, with plain terror]''

===''I Am My Monster''===
:'''Greg''': ''[calling out]'' Just calm down, son! Take deep breaths! Deep breaths!
:'''Amethyst''': Yeah! Relax, buddy!
:'''Peridot''': Let's hurry up and clobber that thing!
:'''Garnet''': Stand down.
:'''Peridot''': What for?!
:'''Lapis''': Where's Steven?
:'''Garnet''': That ''is'' Steven.
:'''Peridot, Bismuth &amp; Lapis''': ''[shocked]'' WHAT?!
:''[Monster Steven bashes his head against the cliff of the temple, causing an avalanche of boulders to fall]''
:'''Garnet''': RUN!
:'''Amethyst''': He's not listening to us at all!
:'''Pearl''': What happened to him? First, he says he's a shatterer and then he's turned into this...''thing''!
:'''Connie''': We can change him back, can't we?
:'''Garnet''': As long as he believes he's a monster, he'll ''stay'' one.
:'''Bismuth''': We gotta keep him away from the town!
:'''Garnet''': Connie, do what you can to protect the townspeople.
:'''Connie''': Right!
:'''Garnet''': ''[to Bismuth, Lapis, and Peridot]'' You three, joint him into the ocean and hold him there. Let's go, guys. ''[she, Amethyst, and Pearl fuse into Alexandrite]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Spinel and the Diamonds arrive in their ship]''
:'''Spinel''': ''[emerging, holding Steven's flip flop he left behind on Homeworld]'' You forgot your foot thong thingy! ''[sees Monster Steven]'' OOOH, OH!
:''[The Diamonds walk out of the ship]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': What is going on here?
:'''White Diamond''': Why is something like this ''always'' happening when we show up for a visit?
:'''Blue Diamond''': What is that thing?
:'''Garnet''': That &quot;thing&quot; is Steven.
:''[Blue Diamond, White Diamond, and Spinel all gasp in shock]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': What?!
:'''White Diamond''': Impossible!
:'''Blue Diamond''': Is he corrupted?
:'''Yellow Diamond''': But how?
:'''Garnet''': Never mind that. We have to change him back.
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Leave it to me. ''[she catches Monster Steven's head in an energy aura and tries to shrink it down, only for it to revert back immediately, to her confusion]'' With my new power, I should be able to alter his physical form.
:'''Blue Diamond''': He's resisting. Maybe he needs to feel better first. I can help with that. ''[she sends a cloud of joy towards Monster Steven, but he blows it right back]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Look out! ''[the cloud hits her and Spinel, and they start laughing uncontrollably]'' Wow! Your new power didn't work either!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[pushes Yellow and Blue aside and approaches Monster Steven]'' Enough. I know exactly how to help. If I connect with him and he speaks through me, maybe we'll understand what he's going through. Now then, do you hear me, Steven? ''[her gem glows and the atmosphere's colors change]'' Just relax and let me in… Wait-- ''[her eyes glow, and she cries out and falls back as Yellow and Blue catch her]''
:'''Yellow Diamond''': White!
:'''Blue Diamond''': What happened?!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[horrified]'' That's ''not'' Steven anymore!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Amethyst''': Guys, look! The Cluster is trying to hold Steven back!
:'''Peridot''': I can't believe it! He's even stronger than the Cluster!
:'''Bismuth''': Don't let your guard down. He could break free at any moment!
:'''Pearl''': Deep inside this…monster, Steven must be in there, so angry.
:'''Amethyst''': I knew something was going on. I- Why didn't I ''do'' something?!
:'''Sapphire''': ''[crying]'' If we don't get through to him, he'll stay like this ''forever!'' ''[starts sobbing along with Ruby while Lapis watches]''
:'''Amethyst''': ''[to Greg as he takes a few steps back]'' Dude, you should get outta here before you get hurt!
:'''Greg''': ''[stomps his foot]'' NO! Everytime Gem stuff happens, I run the other way! This is ''my'' son! And he's right to be angry, because I didn't protect him!
:'''Blue Diamond''': ''[tearing up; crying]'' You didn't protect him from us! He's like this because of us!
:'''Yellow Diamond''': ''[crying]'' ''We're'' the source of Steven's suffering!
:'''Spinel''': ''[breaks down, sobbing hysterically and blowing her nose into her pigtails]'' THIS IS ''MY'' FAULT!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[crying]'' Spinel, don't be silly. Everyone knows that all of this is because of ''me!''
:'''Spinel''': No, it's ME! I tried to wipe his friends' memories, so he would die alone on a barren world!
:'''White Diamond''': ''[sobbing sorrowfully]'' That was because you were angry with Pink! And if Pink hurt you, it was because ''I'' hurt ''her!'' Like I hurt Yellow and Blue and Steven and everyone in the entire universe! This is all ''my'' fault!
:'''Connie''': YES, it is! ''[rides in on Lion]'' Yes, you hurt him, but this isn't the time to make this all about you! That is not helping! Maybe Steven would care how sad you are, because he always puts everyone else's feelings first! But he can't do that for you right now, because he needs ''us'' this time! We all have Steven when we needed him. But the only person who's never had Steven is Steven! He's ''always'' been there for us, so… how can we be there for him now?
:''[Ruby and Sapphire smile and fuse back into Garnet]''
:'''Garnet''': I know how. ''[Monster Steven breaks free of the Cluster's hand, defeating it and charges at the beach]'' Okay! No time to waste. Yellow, make me as big as him!
:'''Yellow Diamond''': Right.
:'''Garnet''': Blue, lift everyone up!
:'''Blue Diamond''': Of course.
:'''Garnet''': Everyone, get in line!
:'''Greg''': You got it!
:'''Garnet''': It's time to show Steven… some love.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Garnet''': ''[hugging her arms tightly around Monster Steven while he struggles; calmly]'' Steven, when I fell apart, you were there for me. I want to be there for ''you'' now. I'm here, Steven. I'm here.
:'''Lapis''': This is working? You hear us? Steven! ''[comes and hugs him]''
:''[Everyone comes in for the hug too]''
:'''Greg''': I'm here, Schtu-Ball! Whatever you need, I'll make it happen! You hear me?!
:'''Peridot''': Steven, you never gave up on me for some reason I don't understand! I'll do the same for you!
:'''Amethyst''': I know you feel bad! Believe me, I get it! Sometimes it feels like you're never gonna like yourself but… it's possible, man!
:'''Pearl''': Steven, I know how awful it feels to keep a part of yourself secret! You shouldn't have to hide anything from me!
:''[Monster Steven stammers emotionally, and the Cluster's hand reappears and takes his]''
:'''Connie''': ''[jumps off Lion's head before landing on Monster Steven's nose and hugs his face; sighs]'' Steven… you must have been ''so'' afraid to show us this side of yourself, but we're not going anywhere. We're all gonna take care of you the same way you took care of us. You know what? I don't have your powers, but… ''[kisses him with a pink droplet appearing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Steven''': ''[wakes up, back to his normal human-self, still crying]'' Huh? ''[looks and sees everyone smiling at him]'' Wha…I… Did-Did I-I'm- ''[Lion pops up and licks him; chuckling]'' Lion. ''[hugs Lion]'' Lion! ''[begins sobbing, letting out his emotions]''

===''The Future''===
:'''Jasper''': ''[bursts through the wall, staying aloof]'' Heard you're leaving. ''[faces at Steven]'' I'm coming with you!
:'''Steven''': Jasper, I'm going ''alone.''
:'''Jasper''': Then who will protect you?!
:'''Steven''': I can protect myself.
:'''Jasper''': ''[sighs disappointedly, scowls]'' I know. ''[punches a hole in the ground and looks the opposite direction]'' Farewell, my Diamond. ''[headbutts the wall, creating another Jasper-shaped hole next to the previous one, walks through it]''
:'''Steven''': Whoa! Even Jasper's more upset than my own family! Maybe I need a round two?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Garnet''': I couldn't resist looking into your future. I peeked, and I saw a possibility that our tears would keep you from leaving. But I also saw many paths ahead of you, and we are a part of ''all'' of them. Wherever you end up, we will visit you to talk, to listen, to be there – whenever you need us. We love you, Steven.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:Steven Universe]]</text>
      <sha1>h3adx8y90ba1qemdqz1lsa25xrvpyt4</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Chinweizu Ibekwe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>222161</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965014</id>
      <parentid>3175937</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:42:11Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Elcarim1</username>
        <id>3345595</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965014</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1872" sha1="jy3qa7evz4hcg40z8xarzj3mq7u44d0" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Chinweizu Ibekwe|Chinweizu]]''' (born 26 March 1943) is a Nigerian critic, essayist, poet, and journalist.

== Quotes ==

=== ''Anatomy of Female Power'' (1990) ===

* Men may rule the world, but women rule the men who rule the world.
** cover page
* Female power exists; it hangs over every man like a ubiquitous shadow. Indeed, the life cycle of man, from cradle to grave, may be divided into three phases, each of which is defined by the form of female power which dominates him: motherpower, bridepower, or wifepower.
** p. 14
* Once we remind ourselves that a woman's principal occupation is the winning and holding of at least one male slave; and that her looks are among her primary assets for this business, we must realize that man's condescending attitude to her obsession with her looks is obtuse. Not just obtuse; it is a sign of men's own folly. 
** p. 39
'''Chinweizu: Nigerians and their anti-corruption charade'''
*ANYBODY who thinks that, under Nigeria’s 1999 Constitution, any government, party or president can eradicate corruption is like a man who expects a worm to give birth to a lion, or who wants to go to heaven but doesn’t want to die.
**[https://guardian.ng/opinion/columnists/chinweizu-nigerians-and-their-anti-corruption-charade/]

*If Nigerians are at all serious in their endless noisemaking against corruption, they must, as a first step, get rid of their 1999 Constitution. Anybody who is claiming he can end corruption but who isn’t campaigning to get rid of the 1999 Constitution is a fraud.
**[https://guardian.ng/opinion/columnists/chinweizu-nigerians-and-their-anti-corruption-charade/]

== See also ==

*[[Antifeminism]]

== External links ==

* [http://therawness.com/AFP.pdf PDF scan] of the book.

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ibekwe, Chinweizu}}
[[Category:1943 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:People from Nigeria]]</text>
      <sha1>jy3qa7evz4hcg40z8xarzj3mq7u44d0</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Akwaeke Emezi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>222562</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964976</id>
      <parentid>3871577</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:13:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964976</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9831" sha1="lnwerbfcrlg3ig2tg2wi4vhq9zx8vug" xml:space="preserve">'''[[wikipedia: Akwaeke Emezi|Akwaeke Emezi]]''' (born 1987) is Nigerian-born writer and video artist of Igbo and Tamil descent.

==Quotes==
*I think multiple realities exist. Most colonised countries had their cosmology, their ontology, their metaphysics colonised too. They’ve been told that what was there before wasn’t real. My dad’s a pretty conservative Christian, but he’ll still get a pastor to come to the hospital [where he works as a doctor] because someone’s been working black magic. I say to him: “If you don’t believe in it, why is the pastor there?” He says: “You don’t need to believe in something for it to be real.”
**On whether they believe in the spiritual world in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/oct/20/akwaeke-emezi-interview-freshwater “Akwaeke Emezi: ‘I’d read everything – even the cereal box’”] in The Guardian (2018 Oct 20)

*…I read literally everything I could get my hands on – the shampoo bottle, the cereal box. My mom didn’t let us have books at the table or we’d all have read. We didn’t always have electricity, so I read by candlelight. I read really fast too. My parents realised I’d run out of things to read and were like: “We need to buy you way more books.”
**On being a voracious reader as a child in [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/oct/20/akwaeke-emezi-interview-freshwater “Akwaeke Emezi: ‘I’d read everything – even the cereal box’”] in The Guardian (2018 Oct 20)

*…The novel is autobiographical, so I used my life as a chronological skeleton for the story, which meant revisiting a lot of things that were immensely painful. It was also a process of discovery – I had no outline for Freshwater, no idea how it was going to take shape, but it built itself as I was writing it.
**On their work ''Freshwater'' in [https://granta.com/akwaeke-emezi-in-conversation/ “AKWAEKE EMEZI | IN CONVERSATION”] in Granta Magazine (2018 Oct 31)

*…Whenever you write something biographical, everyone in your family doesn’t share the same memory. So your version of the story is not necessarily their version of the story, and part of the flexibility in having it fictionalized is that there’s not really a need to adhere to the strict facts. Because everything is colored by memory, especially when you’re pulling from childhood memories. There’s a little bit of wiggle room. This is my story of these events, as I remember it, as I experienced it…
**On including biographical details in [https://therumpus.net/2018/02/the-rumpus-interview-with-akwaeke-emezi/ “A SPIRIT BORN INTO A HUMAN BODY: TALKING WITH AKWAEKE EMEZI”] in The Rumpus (2018 Feb 21)

*…When I ask myself what beauty is in my eyes, the answer is that I would prefer not to have eyes. I would prefer not to have flesh, I would prefer to be dust, free of the whole thing altogether…
**On their essay ''The Beauty of Nothing'' kin [https://therumpus.net/2018/02/the-rumpus-interview-with-akwaeke-emezi/ “AKWAEKE EMEZI | AKWAEKE EMEZI ON THE BEAUTY OF NOTHING”] in Literary Hub (2025 Aug 18)
=== ''[[w:The Death of Vivek Oji|The Death of Vivek Oji]]'' (2020) ===
* This was before Vivek, before the fire, before Chika would discover exactly how difficult it was to dig his own grave with the bones of his son.”
** Chapter 2, Page 17

* There was nothing boiling in him, just a loud and clear exhale, a weight of peace wrapping around his heart.”
** Chapter 2, Page 20

* Osita wished, much later, that he’d told Vivek the truth then, that he was so beautiful he made the air around him dull, made Osita hard with desire. ‘Take it off,’ he snapped instead, his throat rough. ‘Put it back before they catch us.’”
** Chapter 2, Pages 25-26
*That morning, she was wearing an orange cotton dress; she looked like a burning sunset, and Chika knew immediately that his story would end with her, that he would drown in her large liquid eyes and it would be the perfect way to go.
*(chapter 2)

==='''[[w:Freshwater|Freshwater]]'''(2018)===
*Meanwhile, Ala continued to watch her child. After all, the Ada was her hatchling, her bloodthirsty little sun, covered in translucent scales.”

*(Part 1, Chapter 4, Page 45)
*The main problem was that we were a distinct we instead of being fully and just her.”

*(Part 1, Chapter 1, Page 18)
*We bled a lot and Saul gave us the injection himself, but the Ada has no scar so perhaps this is a memory.”

*(Part 1, Chapter 1, Page 22)

==='''[[w:Pet|Pet]]'''(2019)===
*There shouldn’t be any monsters left in Lucille. The city used to have them, of course—what city didn’t? They used to be everywhere, thick in the air and oﬀices, in the streets and in people’s own homes. They used to be the police and teachers and judges and even the mayor; yeah, the mayor used to be a monster.”

*(Chapter 1, Page 9)
*Bitter knew her name was heavy, but she hadn’t minded, because it was honest. That was something she’d taught Jam—that a lot of things were manageable as long as they were honest […] But Jam trusted her mother for those brutal truths, and that’s why home was the ﬁrst place she brought the books with the angels in them.”

*(Chapter 1, Page 14)
*Her mother focused on her, cupping her cheek in a chalky hand. ‘Monsters don’t look like anything, doux-doux. That’s the whole point. That’s the whole problem.’”

*(Chapter 1, Page 18)
*Angels aren't pretty pictures in old holy books, just like monsters aren't ugly pictures. It's all just people, doing hard things or doing bad things.”
*(chapter 1)
*As Jam watched, its fur softened and it shifted its stance just a little, draining the menace away. Well, little girl, it replied, I supposed you can call me Pet.”
*(chapter 2)
==='''[[w:You Made a Fool of Death with Your Beauty|You Made a Fool of Death with Your Beauty]]'''(2022)===
*Feyi had already decided who she wanted to be that night, so she stared right back at him, unabashed, drinking in his terra-cotta skin and dark copper beard.”

*(Chapter 1, Page 2)
*Feyi felt like a monster and a traitor, but it was fine, it had to happen.”

*(Chapter 1, Page 5)
*“I think we’re just figuring out how to survive a world on fire…that it’s okay to be alive.”

*(Chapter 1, Page 6)
*For a moment, there was the scream of tires and the mad chime of broken glass, the soft petals of white lilies, and a clod of dirt breaking apart in Feyi’s hand, but she brushed it all aside like smoke.
*(chapter 1)

==='''[[w:Bitter|Bitter]]'''(2022)===
*The revolution needs artists, just like it needs healers and storytellers, just like it needs the organizers and protesters. It's all one big organism working together.
*(Chapter 5, Page 56)

*He raised his head as Bitter emerged from the office, and his face broke into a huge smile. It made the blood rush to Bitter's face, how openly Aloe showed his pleasure at her presence. Sometimes she wondered how he found the courage to flash emotions as if no one could hurt him with them.
*(Chapter 4, Page 43)

*You are allowed to feel safe, &quot; Miss Virtue said. Bitter blinked, the tears heated her eyes because the words were so simple, yet so heavy with permission.
*(Chapter 4, Page 42)

*...the world gotta burn before we can build a new one. We just got different ideas about what kinda fire we need.
*(Chapter 13, Page 138)

*The foster parents had said that she would end up nowhere, then you could make up wherever you wanted to be, you could make it real. You could, for example, paint it into existence.
*(Chapter 7, Page 76)

* &quot;I don't believe that stories have to make people comfortable. Sometimes they exist to unsettle us.&quot;
** [https://www.bombmagazine.org/articles/akwaeke-emezi/ Speaking on the purpose of fiction]

* &quot;Identity is not something I arrived at. It is something I continue to negotiate every day.&quot;
** [https://www.them.us/story/akwaeke-emezi-interview Speaking on identity]

* &quot;Writing gave me a language for experiences I had never seen reflected anywhere else.&quot;
** [https://electricliterature.com/akwaeke-emezi-interview/ Reflecting on becoming a writer]

* &quot;I'm interested in telling stories that refuse easy explanations.&quot;
** [https://www.publishersweekly.com/pw/by-topic/authors/interviews/article/81286-q-a-with-akwaeke-emezi.html On storytelling]

* &quot;The body can carry many truths at the same time.&quot;
** [https://lithub.com/akwaeke-emezi-on-writing-the-body-and-the-self/ Speaking on the body and identity]

* &quot;I've learned that I don't have to make myself smaller for other people to understand me.&quot;
** [https://www.vogue.com/article/akwaeke-emezi-profile Speaking on self-acceptance]

* &quot;Art has always been a place where I could imagine freedom before I could live it.&quot;
** [https://www.frieze.com/article/akwaeke-emezi-interview Speaking on art and freedom]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
*[https://www.supersummary.com/the-death-of-vivek-oji/important-quotes/The Death of Vivek Oji]
*[https://www.supersummary.com/freshwater/important-quotes/ Freshwater]
*[https://www.supersummary.com/pet/important-quotes/ Pet]
*[https://www.bookrags.com/studyguide-pet-akwaeke-emezi/quotes.html#gsc.tab=0/ Pet]
*[https://www.supersummary.com/you-made-a-fool-of-death-with-your-beauty/important-quotes/ You Made a Fool of Death with Your Beauty]
*[https://www.bookrags.com/studyguide-you-made-a-fool-of-death-with-your-beauty/quotes.html#gsc.tab=0/ You Made a Fool of Death with Your Beauty]
*[https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/92036058-bitter/ Bitter]
{{DEFAULTSORT:Emezi, Akwaeke}}
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category: Video artists]]
[[Category: 1987 births]]
[[Category: LGBTQ people]]
[[Category: Living people]]
[[Category:Igbo people]]
[[Category: LGBTQ writers]]
[[Category: Tamil people]]
[[Category:Non-binary people]]</text>
      <sha1>lnwerbfcrlg3ig2tg2wi4vhq9zx8vug</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 4)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>222620</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965238</id>
      <parentid>3962737</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:31:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Ninja Tribunal [4.26] */</comment>
      <origin>3965238</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="89851" sha1="g1eeqa3widbhexa2ax283g87ila95z0" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''Seasons''': [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 1)|1]] / [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 2)|2]] / [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 3)|3]] / [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 4)|4]] / [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 5): Ninja Tribunal|5: Ninja Tribunal]] / [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Fast Forward|6: Fast Forward]] / [[TMNT: Back to the Sewer|7: Back to the Sewer]] | '''Film''': [[Turtles Forever]] | [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003 TV series)|Main]]
&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;

The following is a list of quotes from the fourth season of the 2003 series '''''[[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003 TV series)|Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]]'''''.

== Episodes 79–104 ==

===''Cousin Sid'' [4.01]===
:'''[[w:Splinter (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Master Splinter]]''': ''[Narrating]'' Life moves as the wheel of destiny turns, day to night, night to day. [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 3)#Exodus|Our fight with the Shredder nearly cost us our lives.]] We are broken, battered, but alive. Our bodies will heal but I wonder: Do my sons carry other wounds not so easily overcome? I know with a great heaviness that there will always be some new threat to challenge us. I only pray my sons will be prepared to face it...

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt; 
:''[The episode opens with a view of the Jones’ family farmhouse at night. Cut to the interior. The front door opens, and April enters with Master Splinter.  He is injured and she is supporting him]''
:'''April O'Neil''': Just a little bit further, Master Splinter.
:''[Donatello and Michelangelo enter next. Donatello’s arm is in a sling and Michelangelo is on crutches with casts on his legs]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Finally. Now, someone give me a fork or something. You have no idea how bad my legs itch.
:'''Donatello''': Yeah, we do, Mikey. We heard about it the whole trip.
:''[Last to enter are Casey Jones, Raphael, and Leonardo. Casey and Leonardo are supporting Raphael. The two turtles have bandages wrapped around their bodies. April helps Splinter onto a chair]''
:'''Splinter''': Thank you, April. I am not as young as I once was.  Wound's take longer to heal.
:'''Michelangelo''': I'm still as young as I once was, and I don't feel like I'm ever going to heal!
:''[Casey and Leonardo helps Raphael to lie down on the couch]''
:'''Raphael''': Too bad you didn't break your jaw. Maybe we’d finally get a little peace and quiet around here. ''[bones cracking]'' Ow.
:'''Michelangelo''': ''[sits in a chair next to Splinter’s and props his legs up]'' Ahh! That's... better? ''[sniffs]'' Ew! What's that smell?! It smells like burnt – ''[He glances over at his father]'' Oh, right. Sorry, Sensei.
:'''April''':All right. Who's hungry?
:'''Donatello''': Me!
:'''Michelangelo''': I am!
:'''Donatello''': I am!
:'''Casey Jones''': Over here!
:''[Leonardo is standing at the window, staring into the yard]''
:'''April''': Leo?
:'''Splinter''': Leonardo?
:'''Leonardo''': I'm fine.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''April''': ''[grabs the fork from Michelangelo]'' No scratching.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
: '''Raphael''': Hey, I like it when Leo acts tough. We should get Karai to stab him more often.
:''[Leo angrily glares]''
:'''Mikey''': Easy Leo. Leave Raph to me. Raph needs a hiding place. Don't you, Raphie boy? And I got just the spot.
:'''Raph''': Hiding spot? ''[Leonardo and Donatello carry him to a closet]'' Don't even... No way am I missing this action.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': They're laughing. That's nice. I can't move and they're laughing.
:'''Raphael''': We'll heal. And then we'll beat the shell outta Casey for having such a whackbag family. But you're first, Mikey!
:'''Michelangelo''': OW!

===''The People's Choice'' [4.02]===
:'''[[w:Michelangelo (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Michelangelo]]''': ''[Narrating]'' Who would have guessed that getting back to nature with my bro's would turn into a sci-fi marathon? There's nothing cooler than slimy, slippery space-creatures, giant alien blobs, cosmic rock creatures with a bad attitude, or intergalactic catfight! And here I thought our camping trip was going to be boring. Silly me! ''[Mikey screaming]''

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Mikey''': Cool move! I gotta remember that one.
:'''Raph''': What's wrong with you, nunchuck-for-brains?

===''A Wing and a Prayer'' [4.03]===
:'''Raptarr''': ''[Narrating]'' Long have I watched over the world of man, and have I've been sickened by the ruthless acts of a soulless few. But through it all, I have learned more of who I am. Some call me &quot;Hunter&quot;. Some call me &quot;Protector&quot;. Whatever I am called, I have vowed to be this world's guardian angel.

===''Sons of the Silent Age'' [4.04]===
:'''[[w:April O'Neil|April O'Neil]]''': ''[Narrating]'' I love nature. Its beauty, its balance and perfection. Nature reminds me of what I learned in school about the scientist Charles Darwin. Darwin believed in the survival of the fittest. He explained how life on Earth could be defined simply as the struggle for existence. But, it seems to me that the struggle for existence is never very simple.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''April''': Are you okay, Leo? I know something’s been bothering you.
:'''Leonardo''': Yeah, I... I don’t know. Well, I guess I do. It’s... I just can’t stop thinking about the last time we faced off against the Shredder. ''[clenches his fist]'' That the only way that we could’ve defeated him was by blowing ourselves up. I couldn’t protect my brothers, my master. ''[punches a fist into the palm of his other hand]'' I feel like such a complete failure, and no matter how I try to rationalize it, justify it, it always comes down to the fact that I wasn’t good enough. 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Raphael''': Then the first thing we have ta' do is sneak in there.
:'''Michelangelo''': Right, and like the Three Musketeers used to say, &quot;One for all and all for ninja mode.&quot; Course, I'm paraphrasing. ''[smack]'' Owww!
:'''Raph''': What is wrong with you?
:'''Mikey''': What?

===''Dragon's Brew'' [4.05]===
:'''Hun''': ''[Narrating]'' This is the dawning of a new age. I have seen the past and I have touched the future. I have learned from my late great master that preparation is everything and I am prepared. Our destiny will soon be at hand. Nothing can stop us now. Nothing.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The episode begins inside Casey Jones’ apartment as he flips through TV channels, watching one news report after another but shadowy figure peers at Casey from the window...]''
:'''Leonardo''': No news like bad news, huh, Case? ''[Startled, Casey leaps to his feet and grabs the lamp that’s next to his chair. Then he sees it’s not a threat.]''
:'''Casey''': Jeez, Raph, don’t sneak up on me like--  ''[flicks on the light.]'' Whoa. Leo. To what do I owe the honor?
:'''Leo''': I’ve been thinking, Casey. Doing a lot of thinking.
:'''Casey''': Yeah? What’s thinking got to do with me?
:'''Leo''': There’s been a rash of robberies lately.
:'''Casey''': No kidding. And it ain’t just simple street crime neither. It’s way above the Purple Dragons level, or any of those goons.
:'''Leo''': Exactly. These heists have been expertly pulled off. It feels like something new. Maybe somebody new. And I think we oughta check it out.
:'''Casey''': Whoa, Leo. You been eating out of Raph’s bowl or something?
:'''Leo''': I thought you might want to help.
:'''Casey''': You kidding? It’ll be the return of the C-Man! ''[grabs his gear and pulls on his mask.]'' Let’s go huntin’.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[At the White House in [[Washington, D.C.|Washington DC]] where Agent Bishop is meeting with the President of the U.S. inside the Oval Office]''
:'''President''': As you know, Agent Bishop, I have never been a big fan of your operation.
:'''Agent Bishop''': Yes, Mr. President. And I must say that—
:'''President''': ''[enraged]'' Don’t interrupt me! Do you know how many times I’ve fought to get you more funding? And you and your agency were just about useless in the recent Triceraton invasion! What good are you? And now you and your forces go and attack Oroku Saki’s mansion? Right in the middle of New York City? It’s an outrage! The city’s mayor, two members of Congress and a senator were there. Do you know how many political favors I called in to put a lid on it? Bishop, you had better toe the line! One more fiasco, and I will personally pull the plug on your entire operation! I’ve already got budget cuts to make. And believe you me, I’ve got my eye on your chunk of the pie!
:'''Agent Bishop''': Sir, you’re absolutely right, sir. No mistakes. You have my word.
:'''President''': I don’t want your word, Bishop. I want your sorry carcass out of my office '''now!''' ''[Bishop leaves]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Casey''': Ha~ah!
:'''Hun''': Jones! Uh!
:'''Casey''': ''[elbows him in the gut and then sweeps his feet from under him with a hockey stick]'' You and me, we got unfinished business!
:'''Hun''': Bring it on. ''[Leonardo hops onto a box behind him]'' Thought you turtles ''were'' destroyed.
:'''Leonardo''': There’s a lot of that going around.
:'''Casey''': ''He’s'' mine, Leo!
:'''Leonardo''': I’ll just soften him up a little for you.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Boy''': Mommy, I was dreaming about Daddy. It was horrible!
:'''Mother''': ''[hugs her son]'' It’s okay, Sweetie. Daddy is in a better place, remember?

===''I, Monster'' [4.06]===
:'''Rat King''': ''[Narrating]'' I awoke in the mud and the slime of a filthy river. I don't know where I am or even who I am. I'm haunted by glimpses... momentary fragments of a life I think I had. But what life do I have now? What am I, but a monster? And now all will fear me... because everything fears the monster.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Mikey''': Alright, we ready to play?
:'''Casey''': What's this screwy game called again?
:'''Mikey''': It's called Stealth Hunter. Yours truly is the stealth master. I get 30 seconds head start, then you guys start hunting.
:'''Donnie''': Picture it as Capture the Flag, ninja style. He'll be wearing a bandana that we have to take from him. So far, none of us has been able to protect the bandana for longer than 15 minutes.
:'''Mikey''': But then, none of you is Michelangelo: Battle Nexus Champion! And...he moves like the shadow.
:'''Raph''': Hey, Shadow. Think fast!
:'''Mikey''': Ow! 1 2 3 GO!
:'''Raph''': Hey!
:'''Mikey''': Clocks ticking, bros, catch me lf you can!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Raph''': It ain't like Mikey to be ''this'' good at stealth-hunter. We usually find him in the first two minutes!
:'''Casey''': Wanna bet he cheated? Probably back at the Battle Shell playing video games right now!
:'''Leo''': It isn't right!
:'''Raph''': Relax, Master Leo. Casey's just joking.
:'''Leo''': Not that! We're being followed.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Leo''': I've had enough of this madness!

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Donnie''': Leo!
:'''Leo''': Stay back! He's mine!

===''Grudge Match'' [4.07]===
:'''[[w:Raphael (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Raphael]]''': ''[Narrating]'' It may look like just another day in the Battle Nexus, with the crowds and the cheering, but trust me, this day was gonna be special. I was looking forward to somebody finally shutting Mikey up about being Battle Nexus Champion. But it was starting to look like they were gonna shut Mikey up permanently.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Master Splinter''': Yes. Pizza sounds very appetizing right now, with pepperoni and ''karma''.

===''All Hallows Thieves'' [4.08]===
:'''Raphael''': ''[Narrating]'' Halloween in New York City. One of my favorite times of the year. A day where no matter how odd, how freaky, or scary you might be, you fit in with everyone else. A day when girls and boys all over the city dress as their favorite monsters and heroes and get free candy. A day when even a teenage mutant ninja turtle can walk around in the open. Of course, some Halloweens are filled with more tricks than treats. Maybe this year, we should've stayed home and rented scary movies.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Mikey''': Check it out. A Leo-O-Lantern!
:'''Raph''': You got his charming smile.

===''Bad Day'' [4.09]===
:'''[[w:Donatello (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Donatello]]''': ''[Narrating]'' OK, pop quiz: If a dozen of Agent Bishop's deadly commandos are chasing you at ninety miles an hour from points A, B, and C, what are the odds you're gonna survive the next five minutes?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Master Splinter''': Perhaps, but I am not speaking to you. I wait for my true foes to reveal themselves. You cannot touch me!
:'''Foot Mystic''': This one is more powerful than we imagined.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Karai''': Fools! Another failure!?
:'''Fire Mystic''': Our encounter has given information that will be useful to us. But we did not expect our forces to be breached.
:'''Karai''': And you recklessly revealed your presence to the rodent!
:'''Water Mystic''': We assure you, we have gained enough knowledge for our next assault.
:'''Karai''': Then make it so! Otherwise, when I attack, I assure you it will be no illusion!

===''Aliens Among Us'' [4.10]===
:'''Agent Bishop''': ''[Narrating]'' For more years than I can remember I have stood watch. Preparing for a day I've long known was inevitable. The alien threat is real. And the world has suffered at the hand of these invaders. The world must be prepared it must always be vigilant. And I will make sure it is, no matter what the cost.

&lt;hr width=60%&gt;
:'''Raphael''': Bring it on!
:'''Leonardo''': Raph, come on!
:'''Raphael''': Aww, but I like it when they go &quot;pop!&quot;

===''Dragons Rising'' [4.11]===
:'''[[w:Casey Jones (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Casey Jones]]''': ''[Narrating]'' You know, it's taken me quite a while, but I've really come a long way. I finally got my temper under control. However, there are still a few certain things that can really make my blood boil. Hun is one of them certain things. ''[Flashback to younger Hun and Casey]'' Me and him, we go way back. See, when I was a kid, a gang of street punks was shaking my old man down for protection money. It was Hun and the Purple Dragons. When my Dad wouldn't pay him, they torched our store.
:'''Hun''': ''[grabs young Casey]'' You tell your old man punk, Next time pay up or else. ''[drops young Casey and walks off with the Purple dragons gang as young Casey watches sadly flashbacks end]''
:'''Casey Jones''': ''[Narrating]'' Yeah, me and him, we still got a score to settle. No matter how I try to plan out this problem, the two of us are headed for a bad, bad, showdown.
:''[Casey and Hun grapple with each other atop a truck moving at high speed]''
:'''Casey Jones''': ''[Narrating]'' Who knows? Maybe I haven't come as far as I thought.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Master Splinter''': Hmm, A-ha.
:'''Casey''': ''[Throwing chips on the table]'' I'll call.
:'''Raphael''': Show me what ya got.
:'''Master Splinter''': It is as the great Sage Sakamoto said, &quot;Read them and weep.&quot;
:'''Casey''': No way! A royal flush?!
:'''Raphael''': Aw, come on, Master Splinter, cut us a break.
:'''Master Splinter''':  ''[Taking Raphael's chips]'' If one cannot afford to pay, one should not play. Suckers!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Cut to the Purple Dragons headquarters building]''
:'''Hun''':	Talk to me, Ruffington.
:'''Ruffington''': ''[On a giant video-screen]'' Hun, I’ve just learned that Neo-Tech is moving another shipment of valuable equipment tonight. It could be worth your while.
:'''Hun''': Hmm, I’m listening.
:'''Ruffington''': The shipment lands in New York at two a.m. sharp.
:'''Hun''': Send me the details.
:'''Ruffington''': Oh, and my standard cut applies.
:''[Hun hits a button to change screens. His underling, Fang, appears]''
:'''Fang''': Yes, Master Hun?
:'''Hun''': Fang, get the men ready. We’re going hunting tonight.
:'''Fang''': Yes, Master.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Casey''': That’s Hun’s hideout?
:'''Donatello''': If it is Hun’s new HQ, he’s hiding...
:'''Leonardo''': Right out in the open. Something he learned from his master, The Shredder.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Mrs. Jones''': Arnold, please. Is too dangerous.
:'''Young Casey''': Please, Pops, don’t go.
:'''Arnold Jones Sr.''': ''[squats down and places a hand on his son's shoulder]'' I gotta, kiddo. I put everything we had into that store. I can’t just let them get away with this. I’m going to the police.
:'''Young Casey''': But they said no cops. They said if you—
:'''Arnold Jones Sr.''': Casey, sometimes you just gotta stand up for what’s right, even if the odds are against you. Even if you’re all alone. You gotta just stand up and do the right thing.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Casey''': '''HUN!'''
:'''Hun''': Huh?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Casey, Raphael, Michelangelo and Donatello are inside the Battle Shell and Leonardo stands behind the vehicle outside and crossed his arms]''
:'''Raphael''': Come on, Leo, get in.
:'''Michelangelo''': Let’s go home, bro. ''[Leonardo doesn’t move]''
:'''Raph''': ''[enraged]'' '''Now what!?''' ''[groans]''
:'''Leonardo''': ''[angrily]'' We ''didn't'' finish the job. We blew it. Again! '''We blew it!'''
:'''Donatello''': We ''did'' the best we could. At least we stopped half the convoy.
:'''Leo''': ''[angrily]'' '''Half'''. We stopped '''half'''. And only because we got lucky. ''[turns on his brothers and Casey, voice cracked]'' Is that good enough for you? Is it!? We're always one step behind. We ''act'' like a bunch of '''amateurs'''! How many more times are we gonna get beaten before you guys '''wise up and realize this isn't a game!?'''
:''[Leo turns around and walking off leaving behind his brothers and Casey inside the Battle Shell alone Raph stands up and flips the switch to close the back doors]''
:'''Raph''': I hate to admit it, but ''he'' ain't ''wrong''.
:''[Donatello starts the Battle Shell and drives away, Casey walks up next to him]''
:'''Casey''': Hey, Donny, drive by the cemetery, will ya’? I got an important stop I need to make.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Morning came as Donatello, Raphael and Michelangelo wait outside at the Battle Shell as Casey enters the cemetery, he walks up to his father’s grave]''
:'''Casey''': Hey, Pops, I brought ya’ something. ''[kneels and places the torn piece of jacket from Hun on the grave, the tombstone has a marker reads “Arnold Casey Jones Sr. Beloved Husband, Father and Friend.”]'' You spoke true, Pop. No matter what, you gotta stand up and do the right thing. But I guess I’m lucky. Even when the odds are ''against'' me, I ain’t alone. ''[stands up]'' ''I'' got friends. Good friends.
:''[Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael stand together and watching him as the morning sun rises behind the city]''

===''Still Nobody'' [4.12]===
:'''Nobody''': ''[Narrating]'' Watching over the city, I have learned the sad truth that violence begins violence. They say nobody can break the cycle. That nobody cares. Nobody can do anything about it. Nobody tries to change things and they're right. Because I'm still Nobody and I do care. I will try to change things. I will make a difference.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Elsewhere, the turtles are atop a skyscraper which is under construction]''
:'''Leonardo''': Two-hundred and eight. ''[They are doing pull-ups on the support beams]'' Two-hundred and nine. Two-ten. Two-eleven.
:''[Someone’s shell cell starts to ring. Raphael and Donatello check theirs]''
:'''Raphael''':	Not mine.
:'''Donatello''': Not mine.
:'''Leonardo''': Don't stop. Mikey, you left your shell cell on.
:'''Michelangelo''': I'm sorry mister 'I'm going to pump you up' Leonardo, but I didn’t know we'd be doing a pull-up marathon. ''[Donatello pops him on the back of the head]'' Ow!
:'''Raphael''': Whoa, Don. Don't smack Mikey. ''[He pops Michelangelo]'' That's my job.
:'''Michelangelo''': Hey! Do I look like a piñata?
:'''Donatello''': ''[to Michelangelo]'' Just answer your phone.
:'''Michelangelo''': Talk to the turtle. ''[They all continue the pull-ups]'' Hey, long time no hear. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. No problem. We'll be there.
:'''Raphael''': ''[to Michelangelo]'' Who was it?
:'''Michelangelo''': Nobody.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Fang''': Yes, Master Hun?
:'''Hun''': Scratch Jencko and his Turks off of our list of possible recruits, and see if you can retrieve any of the hardware we sold that punk. ''[The limo arrives in front of the “Oroku Saki Memorial Library”]'' Seems a shame to waste it. ''[steps out of the limo]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Inside, people are milling about, talking to one another. Karai steps up to the podium in front of a large, draped object. Reporters begin taking pictures as the crowd quiets down]''
:'''Karai''': Thank you all for coming to this dedication of the new Oroku Saki Memorial Library. One final gift from my late father to the city that he loved. ''[The drape is pulled off of a huge statue of Oroku Saki. Everyone applauds cameras taking pictures]'' It is a great honor to dedicate my life to carrying on my father’s humanitarian efforts, even though he is gone, taken from us too soon.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Hun''': ''[sarcastic]'' Lovely party, Karai.
:'''Karai''': Hun. I did not expect to see you at this dedication.
:'''Hun''': ''[stands up]'' Explain something to me, Karai! You do all this in the name of the Shredder. ''He'' was a alien slug! How could you have known that and still serve him?!
:'''Karai''': The Shredder gave me a life. He was my father, and I vow in his name, and I will hunt down those who destroyed him and make them pay with their lives!

===''Samurai Tourist'' [4.13]===
:'''Miyamoto Usagi''': ''[Narrating]'' The paths we walk in life are different for each of us. Some walk the land without a care in the world while some choose to take on burdens that would crush the spirits of most. The land cares little of which path you choose. But its inhabitants are another matter entirely. Clearly, this is not our land. Gennosuke and I came to visit old friends, but I fear now that our presence has done more harm than good.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': I think all of you should just lay off the poor guy. I mean, it can't be fun. Always being the responsible one, and WE'RE the ones who really benefit. Raph's free NOT to think cause Leo does all the thinking for him, Don's free to dream, And I'm free to take it easy, all cause Leonardo is busy being responsible enough for all of us.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Splinter''': Thank you, Miyamoto Usagi. When I asked you to come, I hoped you could reach him, but I fear my son is now traveling down a difficult path. A path it seems he must travel alone.
:'''Usagi''': I wish you good luck, Master Splinter. Farewell, my friends. ''[pushes Kojima into the portal]''
:'''Gennosuke''': So long boys! ''[chuckling]''
:''[Gennosuke follows Usagi into the portal. Suddenly..]''
:'''Michelangelo''': ''[scream, appears on the upper landing]'' Stop him! Don’t let him go!
:'''Donatello''': Mikey? ''[The portal vanishes]''
:'''Raphael''': What now, shell for brains?
:'''Michelangelo''': My Silver Sentry comics. Gen, ''he- he'' took ‘em. All of ‘em. '''NO!'''

===''The Ancient One'' [4.14]===
:'''[[w:Leonardo (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Leonardo]]''': ''[Narrating]'' I've traveled thousands of miles looking for an answer, only to wind up here, halfway across the world in the middle of nowhere, battling it out with four nasty creatures, more ghosts than man, but who's steel is all too real. Meanwhile, my traveling companion, some gross slob who attached himself to me like a bloated tick, doesn't do a thing to help out. He just sits there, grinning like a fool, leaving me to fight for both our lives. I've journeyed all across the world in search for answers, and instead, all I'm gonna get is my head chopped off.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The episode begins inside the turtles’ lair, as Leonardo and Splinter spar]''
:'''Leonardo''': I already told you, ''I’m'' fine.
:'''Master Splinter''': You are sure?!
:''[Michelangelo lowers his comic book and grimaces]''
:'''Leonardo''': Nothing’s the matter, Sensei. Why do you keep ''asking'' me that?!
:'''Master Splinter''': So much anger. The unopened bottle will burst when it’s internal pressure becomes too much to bear. ''[Donatello spots Raphael at the weight bench]'' For months now you have been brooding, surly, and stubborn.
:''[Donatello appears worried]''
:'''Leonardo''': Yeah, right.
:''[Donatello and Raphael glance at one another. Shift to Splinter and Leonardo, who are sparring with swords]''
:'''Master Splinter''': You have not been yourself. You must release what festers within you. Your family will help you, Leonardo. It is important that we be open with one another.
:''[Leonardo attacks and manages to disarm Splinter. He then angrily confronts his father]''
:'''Leonardo''': Open?! Okay, this Katana lesson stinks! I've mastered this years ago! '''Years ago'''!
:'''Master Splinter''': ''[stares at him and then retrieves the sword]'' It is ''not'' the students place to say when a lesson is learned. ''[He attacks]'' The student’s place is to listen and learn.
:''[The sparring grows fierce and the other turtles gather to watch]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Something tells me the cork’s about to pop on that unopened bottle.
:'''Raphael''': That hothead. ''[Donatello and Michelangelo look at him]'' I hate it when Leo reminds me of ''me''.
:'''Leonardo''': I've already mastered this lesson! ''[shoves Splinter]'' And yesterday's lesson! And the lesson before that! '''When are you going to teach me''' ''[disarms Splinter]'' '''SOMETHING I DON'T ALREADY KNOW?!''' ''[slashes at Splinter and slices his head. The other turtles run to their father as he drops to one knee and grabs his head]''
:'''Donatello''': Master Splinter!
:'''Michelangelo''': Are you okay? ''[Leonardo drops his sword]''
:'''Raphael''':	Leo! What the shell is ''your'' problem?!
:'''Leonardo''': ''[shoves past Raphael]'' Master! ''[and Donatello]'' Master, I’m so sorry. I-I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just… I just lost control. ''[hangs his head]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Later, Master Splinter kneels in his room, which is candle lit. There is a bandage on his head. Leonardo stands in the doorway]''
:'''Splinter''': Sit down, my son.
:''[Leonardo enters, slides the door shut, and kneels before his father]''
:'''Leonardo''': Master, I-I don’t know what to say.
:'''Splinter''': Say nothing, listen. We were all badly wounded in ''our'' final confrontation with the Shredder. Your brothers and I have healed, but you have not. I have meditated long and hard on this matter, and now realize that you are correct. 
:'''Leonardo''': Huh?
:'''Splinter''': It is time for you to move on. It is time for you to study with a new sensei.
:'''Leonardo''': But-but, Master, I don’t want a new sensei. I’m happy here with you. ''[Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael are listening at the door]'' I know there’s so much more that you can teach me.
:'''Splinter''': No, my son. It is as it must be. ''[Both stand and Splinter goes to the shelves on his back wall]'' Now, there is but one master in all the world that I would entrust my son’s well-being to. He is wise, honorable, and highly skilled. He is called the Ancient One, ''[He looks at a picture of Hamato Yoshi]'' and he was the sensei to my sensei, Hamato Yoshi. You must make a pilgrimage, a pilgrimage halfway across the world.
:'''Leonardo''': But, Sensei…
:'''Splinter''': Come, let us prepare you for your journey.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[He pushes Leonardo back and swings at him. As Leonardo fights, he has a flashback to Donatello, aboard Shredder’s starship during [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 3)|Exodus part 2]], as the engine starts to overload]''
:'''Donatello''': Help me, Leo! I’m hurt! ''[echoes]''
:'''Michelangelo''': We’re not gonna make it! Leo, help me! ''[echoes]''
:'''Raphael''': Leo, the Shredder’s coming for us! You gotta do something! ''[echoes]''
:'''Splinter''': Save us, Leonardo! We are all counting on you, my son. ''[echoes]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Ancient One''': If there was nothing more you could have done, why do you punish yourself so? 
:'''Leonardo''': I finally understand. ''[He turns and walks back to the short man and then drops to one knee]'' Ancient One. I am honored. 
:'''Ancient One''': Took you long enough, Leonardo.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Ancient One''': Now, Leonardo, tell an old man just what it is you think you have learned. ''[hands a bowl to Leonardo]''
:'''Leonardo''': I guess I’ve been… I’ve been obsessed with failing. I hardened my heart like a rock; wrapped up inside my own shell. Trying to be perfect; thinking I wasn’t good enough, that I needed to be better. So angry… so…. ''[The Ancient One raps him on the head with a bamboo stick]'' Ow! What?
:'''Ancient One''':	Too many words. Explain simply.
:'''Leonardo''': I’ve been my own worst enemy.
:'''Ancient One''':	Much better. Now, relax and enjoy your tea, and let me tell you a tale of Master Yoshi. Yoshi found himself at a crossroads, not dissimilar to your own.

===''Scion of the Shredder'' [4.15]===
:'''Donatello''': ''[Narrating]'' I've been worried a lot lately. For starters, I'm worried about the Foot. They're back... and they're tougher than ever. And... I'm worried about my brother, Leonardo. He's on a quest to parts unknown, and I'm worried he's not gonna find what he's been looking for. But mostly... I'm worried that Leo won't find us alive when he gets back. Master Splinter tells me that I worry too much. Okay, you tell me. Should I be worried?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[The episode opens inside the turtles’ lair. Raphael is working out on his punching bag. Donatello is strapped into a harness, suspended over the Shell Sub where he is doing some welding. Michelangelo is seated on the couch with Klunk next to him. He is stacking playing cards while Master Splinter looks on]''
:'''Splinter''': That is an impressive edifice, Michelangelo. Dare I ask how many hours you have spent building it?
:'''Michelangelo''': Good question, Sensei. Hey, Raph, what time is it?
:'''Raphael''':	Like I wear a watch? How should I know? Hey, Donny, what time is it?
:'''Donatello''': Beats me. Ask Leo. ''[He cuts off the welding torch and his brothers stop what they are doing. Splinter lowers his head with a sigh]'' Sorry. Leo’s been gone more than two months and I still forget he’s not here.
:'''Raphael''': Master Splinter, when’s that bum coming back anyway?
:''[Donatello and Raphael walk over to join the others]''
:'''Michelangelo''': And is Leo coming back normal, or like, more normal? ‘Cause before he left he was acting kinda, you know... ''[He twirls a finger next to his temple and Raphael slaps the back of his head]'' Ow! Hey!
:'''Splinter''': I do not know, my sons. Leonardo is on a pilgrimage to find the Ancient One, and to find answers. Such things are beyond time.
:'''Donatello''': Well, I miss having him around.
:'''Splinter''': As do we all. We must have faith that he will return when he is ready.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Ancient One''': Leonardo, your family is in grave danger.
:'''Leonardo''': What?! ''[jumps up and leaps over to join the Ancient One, who nods at him]'' I understand, Sensei.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': Um, what is that?
:''[The turtles pull their weapons. Klunk curls around Michelangelo’s ankle]''
:'''Raphael''':	Whatever it is, it’s coming through the front door!
:''[The banging continues and the heavily fortified lair entrance bulges. The lair shakes and stones fall. The door shifts to one side and a brace rips loose, then the door falls. Splinter and the turtles rush towards the ramp and watch as two huge Foot mechs, called Shrednauts, crash through the wall and enter the lair. The Shrednauts pause and Foot ninja run into the lair]''
:'''Michelangelo''': What the...? The Foot!
:'''Donatello''': But how? How did ''they'' find us?
:'''Raphael''': Don’t matter how ''they'' found us, '''''they''''' found us. Now let’s kick the shell out of ‘em! ''[He rushes to meet some advancing ninja]'' '''Get... out... of... ''my'' house!'''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Raphael''': Oh, shell!
:'''Donatello''': No way! It can’t be him!
:'''Michelangelo''': Master Splinter, any chance this is just another mystical attack?
:'''Splinter''': No, my son, this is real. All too real.
:'''Donnie''': The Shredder! But, the Utroms sentenced him to exile.
:'''Raph''': Yeah? Well, it didn’t take.
:''[The dust around the Shredder swirls and then the four Foot Elite appear]''
:'''Karai''': Oroku Saki is gone, thanks to ''you'', but the Shredder lives on! ''[She removes her helmet to reveal herself]''
:'''Donnie''': Karai!
:'''Splinter''': So the daughter of Oroku Saki ''has'' become the Shredder. Why?
:'''Karai''': Honor demands it, Splinter-san. After ''you'' helped the vile Utroms exile my father, ''I'' vowed to avenge ''his'' honor!
:'''Splinter''': ''You'' dare speak of honor!? ''Your'' father murdered ''my'' Master Yoshi! ''Your'' father had ''no'' honor!
:'''Karai''': You will pay for your lie! ''All of you!'' Where is Leonardo?!
:'''Raph''': ''He'' ain't here!
:'''Mikey''': ''You'' know, you just ''missed'' him, but if you ''leave'' right now, we'll tell him that you stopped by!
:'''Karai''': ''You'' mock me. The fact that ''you'' still live ''mocks'' me! ''[She dons the helmet]'' That all ends now! ''Destroy them!'' Leave no one alive.

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Splinter''': Master Yoshi's orb. ''[Karai brakes it]'' No!
:'''Karai''': ''Your'' sons ''destroyed'' my father! Now I will repay ''them'' in kind! I begged Leonardo to let ''him'' go, but ''he'' would not listen to ''reason!''
:'''Splinter''': It is ''you'' who has been blinded to ''reason!'' Oroku Saki ''was'' a murderer! But ''you'' will ''not'' allow yourself to see the truth!
:'''Karai''': I see clearly, rat! and ''you'' will pay for what you have done to me!
:''[They fight]''
:'''Splinter''': I reached out to ''you''! I hoped that you would turn away from evil, but I can see now that has consumed you! ''[Karai slashes his shoulder]'' Ugh! ''[steps back]'' You are faster than your father. I will give you that, but ''your'' dark heart will betrayed ''you'', '''just as ''his'' did!'''
:''[She strikes him hard enough to expel him from the room. Karai stalks towards him as Splinter lays on the ground]''
:'''Karai''': You are not even worthy to speak of my father, rodent! ''[grabs him by his robe and lifts him off the ground]'' '''I ''will'' silence your treacherous tongue once and for all!''' ''[She draws back an arm to strike]''

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Raphael''': ''[pushes himself up from the ground and sees Karai strike his father]'' '''''NO!'''''
:'''Donatello''': Master Splinter!
:''[Raphael races forward and leaps at Karai, who spins around and hits him, dropping Splinter in the process. Donatello runs at her and jumps, kicking her to the ground, which causes Karai to lose her helmet. She doesn’t move and Donatello helps Splinter stand up. He is joined by Raphael and Michelangelo]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Master Splinter!
:'''Donatello''':	We have to get out of here.
:''[They all spin around at another loud crashing sound, to find the lair filled with enemies, all of them staring at the mutant family]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Uh, easier said than done.
:'''Raphael''': Donnie, you take Master Splinter with you. ''We'' split up, get out, and hook back up again topside. Got it? ''[They jump as a Shrednaut strikes the ledge they were on]'' Now let’s go! And guys, be careful.

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': Klunk? ''[Klunk meow]'' Where are you, Klunk? ''[He ducks a laser blast and then looks up to see Klunk standing on an overhead rafter]'' Ah! Hang on, Klunk, I’m coming! ''[He leaps and climbs until he reaches the cat]'' I got you pal. Mikey’s here.
:''[He picks up Klunk and then spots a Shrednaut taking aim at him. It fires and Michelangelo jumps for a rope, which he climbs while Klunk clings to his shell. Still dodging blasts from the Shrednaut, Michelangelo leaps for a fire escape ladder which he rides down to the floor below. Jumping off the ladder, he hops from Foot ninja to Foot ninja, bouncing off of their shoulders, before spin kicking one down and landing on the ground. He turns to find a Shrednaut aiming at him. Michelangelo darts between the legs of another Shrednaut and rolls to a stop at a ramp. Holding Klunk, he runs as a Shrednaut pulverizes a support column and the rocks tumble down. Michelangelo races into the next room and the Shrednaut follows. Parked along one wall is the Turtle Tunneler. Michelangelo is inside with Klunk]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Don’t worry, Klunk. I’ve got a plan. ''[Klunk hops into his lap]'' Here we go.
:''[He starts the Tunneler’s engine and fires up the front laser drill. As he drives towards a back wall, the Shrednaut opens fire. The Tunneler drills its way into the sewer tunnels and drives away, but the Shrednaut enters the tunnel and gives chase]''

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:''[Meanwhile, the elevator reaches the garage above the lair. When the elevator door opens, Raphael walks out slowly, and then drops to all fours, breathing hard. Behind him, the Foot ninja are all unconscious. Suddenly the garage door opens and Raphael looks up to see more Foot ninja approaching]''
:'''Raphael''': You gotta be kidding me.
:''[The Foot ninja race towards him and Raphael jumps up to run for the Battle Shell. He enters just as the ninja throw several throwing stars at him, all of them hitting the door. Raphael starts the engine and then fires a missile at the Foot ninja blocking the door. With the path cleared, Raphael drives out of the garage and onto the city streets]''

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:''[Meanwhile, Karai is still inside the lair]''
:'''Karai''': In the name of Oroku Saki, ''Find them!'' They must not be allowed to live. ''[The Foot bow to her and run to do her bidding]'' And tear this filthy place apart, Leave nothing standing!
:''[The Shrednauts begin firing, taking down support pillars and blasting the ceiling with missiles. Karai laughs as the turtles’ home is destroyed]''

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:''[To the river, where Donatello, piloting the Shell Sub, is trying to shake his pursuers. The Foot fire torpedoes]''
:'''Donatello''': Hold on, Master Splinter.
:''He pulls back hard on the steering column and the Shell Sub goes straight up. The torpedoes hit each other and explode. The Foot manage to get in front of him and one fires his torpedoes, scoring a direct hit on the underbelly of the Shell Sub. The sub flips over, water beginning to drip into the interior.''
:'''Donatello''': I don’t have enough firepower to fight all of them. Unless… ''[glances at a set of controls]'' Hang on, Master Splinter. I’ve got an idea.
:''[He presses a set of buttons and the Shell Sub rights itself. Torpedoes launch and fire directly into the river bottom, where they raise a dust cloud. Donatello manages to keep the sub upright and land it at the center of the dust cloud. River bottom dirt covers the sub as it settles on the bottom. The Foot converge on the spot where it went down. Inside, Donatello forces open the door and water floods into the cabin. He gives the diving gear to Splinter and then takes a deep breath before kicking a gear and then swimming out of the sub. Suddenly, the Shell Sub emerges and shoots straight upwards. Donatello and Splinter peek up out of the dirt to watch the Foot go after it and fire multiple torpedoes, all of which hit the sub. It explodes, and the remains sink to the river bottom]''
:'''Underwater Foot Ninja''': Mistress Karai, Donatello and the rat have been destroyed.
:'''Karai''': ''[on radio]'' Excellent. Most excellent.
:''[The Foot leave. Donatello and Splinter pass the breathing mask back and forth as they swim for the surface]''

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:''[Michelangelo punches through a wall with the Tunneler and enters the subway tunnels. He drives straight across tracks and drills through another wall to reach another sewer tunnel, with the Shrednaut in hot pursuit. he opens the door]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Hang on, Klunk! ''[jumps out of the Tunneler and dives for cover in the side tunnel. The Tunneler speeds away with the Shrednaut in pursuit. The Shrednaut fires several missiles and hits the Tunneler, which rolls over and crashes]''
:'''Foot Technician''': Foot Mech Four to Base. Michelangelo is finished.
:'''Karai''': ''[on radio]'' Excellent.
:''[Michelangelo runs away from the area, carrying Klunk with him]''

&lt;hr width80%&gt;
:'''Karai''': ''[Cut to an overhead view of the city]'' All that remains is Leonardo.

===''Prodigal Son'' [4.16]===
:'''[[w:Karai (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Karai]]''': ''[Praying]'' Honorable father, though you are imprisoned among the stars, I bring you news that will set free your soul. I, your humble daughter, Karai, discovered the lair of your most hated enemies and led a full Foot attack force against them. Utterly defeated, all they could was flee. Donatello and the rat we left destroyed at the bottom of the river. Michelangelo tried to burrow his way into safety, but he could not dig deep enough to escape my wrath. And Raphael was blown to smithereens in the turtles' own Battle Shell. All that remains is Leonardo, father, and once I find him, then you will truly and forever be avenged!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': Man! I really missed this old place. ''[sees the ruins of the Lair]'' Oh no, the lair! ''[strips off his coat and draws a katana before entering]'' No! What happened here!? ''[picks up a broken Shell Cell, looks around, and continues on, finding that the lair has almost been completely destroyed. Poised on a ledge above, a Shrednaut’s lights come on. It captures Leonardo’s presence in its view screen and jumps down in front of him. The Foot Technician inside the Shrednaut opens fire, but Leonardo leaps to safety and pulls his second sword]'' '''You dare come into my home and do this?!''' ''[jumps at the control pod where the Technician sits and slices into it, causing the Shrednaut to tumble backwards and power down. Leonardo then slices open the harness which holds the Technician in his seat. Leonardo spots the emblem on the Technician’s shirt]'' The Foot. ''[grabs the Technician by the shirt front and lifts him]'' '''My family, where are they?!'''
:'''Foot Technician''': You’ll get nothing from me!
:''[He presses a button and sparks begin to fly from the Shrednaut’s body. Leonardo leaps away and the Technician flees the machine. Leonardo races out of the lair as the Shrednaut overloads and explodes. The explosion sends Leonardo flying partway down the tunnel, but he is unhurt]''
:'''Leonardo''': I need some answers.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''April O'Neil''': ''[from her warning note]'' Leo, I'm so sorry. I not sure what to say, the others are... Karai said she got them all. ''She'' left this. She says your next. Be careful.
:'''Leonardo''': No! It can't be! Karai is ''lying!'' They’re alive, I know it!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[At the Foot Headquarters. A helicopter comes in for a landing and Karai steps out. A Foot ninja meets her and delivers a report]''
:'''Foot Ninja''': Mistress Karai, we just received the report. The Shrednaut unit stationed in the turtles’ lair was destroyed.
:'''Karai''': Leonardo. Deploy all available Foot ninja. Search the city. ''Destroy him!'' ''[The ninja bows and leaves]'' This night my beloved father will truly be avenged!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Leonardo enters an abandoned building through the broken skylight. Behind him, Donatello sees only a shadowed form and draws his bō. Hearing the sound, Leonardo draws a sword and spins around]''
:'''Leonardo''': Donny? It’s me.
:'''Donatello''': Ah, Leo. ''[limps towards his brother]'' You’re back!
:''[They shake hands in greeting]''
:'''Leonardo''': You okay?
:'''Splinter''': My son.
:'''Leonardo''': Master Splinter. ''[His father comes out of the shadows, holding his side]'' I knew it. I knew you were both alive. Don’t worry, Sensei, everything’s gonna be okay. I promise.
:'''Donatello''': Oh man, it’s good to see you, bro’.
:'''Leonardo''': We have to get both of you out of here before any more Foot show up.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Cut to a long range view of {{w|Belvedere Castle}}. A manhole cover slides into place on a trail in {{w|Central Park}}. In the tunnels below, Leonardo leads the way, illuminating their path with his flashlight]''
:'''Leonardo''': We need to find a safe place for you two to rest and recuperate. Some place far from the old lair. ''[He brushes the dirt off of a sign which reads “Reservoir Pump Station”. Following the arrow on the sign, the trio find a boarded up entrance. he removes the boards and then opens the metal door. He flashes the light around before descending a short set of stairs onto a metal catwalk. The space is huge, with catwalks leading in several directions]'' This oughta do for now.
:'''Donatello''': This must be one of the earlier pumping stations for the reservoir. I think I’ve seen it on some of the old city planning. ''[He looks around at the expansive space and whistles]'' Very nice!
:'''Splinter''': Leonardo, now that Donatello and I are safe…
:'''Leonardo''': I’m already on it, Master Splinter. I’ll find them. ''[He races out of the station]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Raphael''': I ''can't'' believe Karai and the Foot did this to '''''us!''''' I can't believe ''they'' tooked '''''our home!'''''
:'''Leonardo''': Listen, Raph, nothing is permanent. We have to flow with change.
:'''Master Splinter''': Perhaps Leonardo has learned a thing or two from the Ancient One. ''[He and Leonardo look at one another]'' Yes, I can see it in your eyes. I have my son back. And I can see something else in your eyes. Please be careful, my son. She will be well guarded, and her skills are much improved.
:'''Leonardo''': So are mine, sensei. I’ll be fine, I promise. Now, get some rest. I’m gonna go get some food and supplies. I’ll be back.
:'''Raphael''':	Hey, Leo, bring back some sodas or something.
:'''Michelangelo''': And some pizza and Chinese food ''[Klunk meow]'' and some kibble.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Karai is inside the Oroku Saki Memorial Library in full Shredder armor, sans the helmet. She approaches Oroku Saki’s statue, kneels and removes the covering from a katana. This she places in the stand which is at the feet of the statue. As soon as she sets the sword in place, the “Sewer Sweet Sewer” plaque whips through the air and impales the sword stand]''
:'''Leonardo''': ''[coldly]'' Hello, Karai. Got your message.
:'''Karai''': I am impressed. Security here is very tight, yet here you are, undetected. 
:''[Leonardo hops down and takes up a defensive posture]''
:'''Leonardo''': So, you are the new Shredder?
:''[Karai places the helmet on her head and turns]''
:'''Karai''': Yes. ''[draws her sword]'' And I am your doom!
:''[Leonardo pulls one of his swords as well]''
:'''Leonardo''': You have gone too far this time, Karai!
:'''Karai''': Not far enough! Not until you lie broken and battered at my feet! Only then will my father truly be avenged! Make no mistake, Leonardo, son of Splinter, hated enemy of my father. Your path ends here!
:''[leaps at him and he rushes to meet her attack. Their swords clash and they push against each other]''
:'''Leonardo''': I remember when we first met, Karai! We fought side by side and I said you were nothing like the Shredder! ''[He falls back, pulling her down and rolling until she is on her back and he is standing over her]'' I thought you understood honor, but I was wrong! ''You're exactly like him! You understand '''nothing!'''''
:''[She kicks him off, but he does a handspring and regains his feet. Leonardo catches her sword on his and quickly disarms her, sending her sword flying onto the arms of the statue. She takes a swing at him, but he ducks and pulls her second sword from her belt]''
:'''Karai''': No, ''you will pay.'' '''You must pay!''' ''[She tries to slash him with her Tekkō-kagi, but he ducks. Karai squats and launches the weighted end of her Manriki-gusari at him. It wraps around the handle of her stolen sword and she flips backwards, her weight pulling the weapon from his hand. She throws the sword behind her and drops the hook end of the Manriki-gusari into her other hand. Spinning it, she charges and throws the weapon. Leonardo pulls his second katana, leaps, and slices through the chain]'' No! I must have my revenge! ''[She runs but Leonardo pursues. As she turns, he flips through the air at her, slicing several times. Karai’s helmet falls into several pieces, shocking her]''
:'''Leonardo''': Your own anger defeats you, Karai. ''[stands with his back to her]'' You remind me of a Turtle I used to know.
:'''Karai''': ''[takes a couple of steps back, and grabs the communication device from her belt]''  Security to the library… ''[Before she can finish, Leonardo slashes across the device, destroying it. As it falls, Leonardo, who has gotten behind her, places his katana near her head. He taps on her shoulder with the sword and she drops to her knees]'' Go ahead. Do it! Finish me!
:'''Leonardo''': No. ''[Still kneeling, Karai turns as he sheathes his swords]'' I'm giving you one last chance to do the right thing, Karai. Don't waste it. ''[walks over to Saki’s statue]'' And Karai, ''[leaps]'' ''stay away  [grabs Saki’s sword] from my '''family!''''' ''[slashes at the statue and tosses the sword so that it sticks into the floor in front of Karai. As he races away]''
:''[The statue’s head falls, having been sliced away from the body. It bounces and rolls across the floor, coming to a stop in front of Karai. Suddenly the room is flooded with Foot ninjas]''
:'''Foot Ninja''': Mistress Karai! Is everything all right?!
:''[Karai looks up to see two of the upper window panels flapping in the breeze]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Leonardo returns to the new lair carrying a duffel bag]''
:'''Leonardo''': Did someone mention food? ''[takes two containers from the bag]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Chinese food for breakfast? ''[He and Donatello both catch a container]'' Works for me.
:''[Kneeling, Leonardo hands a container of food to Raphael and then stands to walk over to Splinter]''
:'''Leonardo''': I’ve checked it out and this seems like a safe place, Master Splinter. We could stay here, maybe even fix it up a bit.
:'''Splinter''': It is as the great sage, Shinto Sakamoto said, home is where you hang your hat.
:''[Leonardo kneels before him and takes an ornate walking stick from his bag]''
:'''Leonardo''': This walking stick is said to have come from a very ancient and mystic tree. ''[He presents the stick to Splinter, who takes it from him]'' I got it with the Ancient One. I’ve carried it all this way for you.
:'''Splinter''': Ah, a very gracious gift. ''[They bow to one another]'' Thank you, Leonardo. Welcome home.

===''Outbreak'' [4.17]===
:'''Agent Bishop''': ''[Narrating]'' For too long, our world, our history, has been influenced by extraterrestrial threats. I know this all too well. My purpose has always been clear: Defend against the threat. Rebuild humanity to resist invasion. It hasn't always been easy. There are tough choices that need to be made. Someone has to stop this alien plague. It was a vow I made long ago. And I intend to keep it.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': Ugh. Next time I’ll take lookout duty.
:'''Raphael''':	Great. More of Karai's Foot ninja. We should be out hunting them, not the other way around.
:'''Leonardo''': We’ll handle Karai, Raph, but on our terms, not hers. We’ll handle whatever comes our way.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Raphael''': You okay, bro’? ''[helps Donatello up]''
:'''Donatello''': Thanks.
:'''Michelangelo''': Don, Raph, watch out!
:''[They turn to see several tentacles shooting towards them. Raphael shoves Donatello out of  the way]''
:'''Raphael''': Move!
:''[Raphael avoids the tentacles, but one of the spikes strikes Donatello’s thigh]''
:'''Donatello''': Oh! 
:''[Raphael pins the tentacle with his sai]''
:'''Donatello''': My leg.
:'''Raphael''': You okay?
:'''Donatello''': Yeah, just a nick. Uh, thanks again.

===''Trouble with Augie'' [4.18]===
:'''April O'Neil''': ''[Narrating]'' The man in the hat is my uncle Augie. Uncle Augie didn't just teach me math and science, he taught me to love them. If it wasn't for him, I never would've have gotten my college degree in math. Uncle Augie was always coming and going, off on adventures, but we made the most of our time together. Then one day, uncle Augie just disappeared and he never came back. I'd give anything to see my uncle Augie again. I know he's alive and somehow, someway, I'm going to find him.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Mikey''': Especially since Karai the new &quot;miss&quot; Shredder showed up at your shop.

===''Insane in the Membrane'' [4.19]===
:''[Montage of Stockman's accomplishments accompanied by his voice over]''
:'''[[w:Baxter Stockman|Baxter Stockman]]''': ''[Narrating]'' Once, long ago, I, Dr. Baxter Stockman, was a whole man. With a brilliant mind and an able body! In the scientific community, I was unequalled! Throughout the world, I was renowned, revered, worshipped! :''[Flashback of [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003) (season 1)|Attack of the Mousers]]]'' But it all went wrong, horribly, horribly wrong. ''[Shredder ordering Hun to drag Stockman away]'' My genius fell under the control of cruel-minded brutes.
:'''Baxter Stockman''': No, '''NO!'''
:''[We see Hun, from Stockman's POV, thrusting a saw in his face, and the image shatters as it makes contact. A montage of Stockman's various injuries plays until we see him as just a brain in a jar]''
:'''Baxter Stockman''': ''[Narrating]'' They whittled me away, piece by piece, limb by limb, until I was reduced to nearly nothing. ''[Stockman, in his deteriorated form, approaches the camera menacingly]'' But those simpletons aren't to blame. I finally know who's responsible for my downfall, and now, with my new body, I will finally have my revenge!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Baxter Stockman''': ''[Driven to madness and desperation]'' This experiment is a catastrophe. ''[As he slams his hands on the floor which it cracks]'' Uh! HOW could I have been so stupid? Why was I in such a rush? Why didn't I listen to agent Bishop? ''[Rips off his lab coat in rage]'' WHY?! Why am I a failure, my whole life?! Oh, mama. I made such promise. ''[Reminiscing]'' Where did it all go wrong?! Where? ''[The scene turns red and blue as all of Stockman's enemies appear in his mind, reminscing his time with them. First, we cut to Shredder and some Baxter's injuries]'' A horrible degradation at the hands of the Shredder. ''[Cut to Hun, who looks grumpily at camera with Purple Dragons behind his back]'' His horrific thing, Hun! ''[Cut to the turtles]'' Or those despicable turtles! No! No! ''[Camera pans to April, who points at something and then]'' Before them… It was her! I trusted her and ''she'' betrayed me! ''[Cut to the turtles in shadows and April. Raphael is seen kicking robot Stockman]'' ''SHE'' brought in those turtles and ruined everything, my glorious mousers failed because of her and that failure is what brought the Shredder's wrath down upon me! Yes! She's responsible, ''she'' did this to me. ''[He picks up the whole table, throws at machinery and brakes]'' And ''she'' is the one '''who will pay!'''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Casey Jones''': Guys! It’s Stockman! ''He’s'' back, ''he'' has taken April!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Casey Jones''': He just busted in he knocked me out when I woke up they were gone, all I remember is him saying something about going back to where this all started.
:'''Raphael''':	Where it all started?
:'''Leonardo''': Stocktronics, ''[To Stockman continues to carry April to his old lab building now abandoned, offscreen]'' the lab where he and April first worked together it has to be. 

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Baxter Stockman's mother''': Baxter, ''[coughing]'' I'm sorry baby doll Mama's just worn out, I guess this old body just can't take it, I so wanted to see you grow up and be a fine man, I did ''[coughing]'' Remember the sky's the limit for you boy, I... I... I love you, Baxter. ''[dies]''
:'''Young Baxter Stockman''': No, Mama! Don't leave me. Mama! Mama!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leo''': Let her go, Stockman!
:'''Baxter Stockman''': April? You, you betrayed me!
:'''Donnie''': Run, April! Get out of here!
:'''Baxter Stockman''': No! She can't leave, I forbid it!
:'''Mikey''': You asked for it, Dr. Stockman-Stein!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Raph''': There they are!
:'''Mikey''': On the cable car!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Stockman''': Now we can finally set things right.
:'''April''': Doctor Stockman, please don’t this, can you remember when your work helped people when it was about the science? You were a brilliant man the sky was the limit for you Doctor Stockman.
:'''Stockman''': ''[starts hallucinating again]'' Mama? ''[sees April as his mother]''
:'''Baxter Stockman's mother''': The sky was the limit you were such a good boy, you had so much potential, what happened to you baby doll? ''[sees her as herself again]''
:'''April''': You were someone I admired, someone I respected and you can be again.
:'''Baxter Stockman''':	Mama what have I done?
:''[The coupling of the cable car continues to break]''
:'''April''': Doctor.
:''[Stockman hallucinates April as his mother again]''
:'''Baxter Stockman's mother''': Baxter.
:'''April''': Please.
:''[The cable car shakes and she trips backwards]''
:'''Baxter Stockman''':	(gasps) Mama, Mama.
:'''Casey''': April!
:'''Baxter Stockman''':	''[still hallucinates April as his mother]'' Mama. You've got to get off of here, Mama it's not safe. ''[He comes to April and picks her, Casey climbs down the cable and grabs April]'' Hurry Mama, ''[Casey places his around April and they both look at Stockman]'' hurry! I love you, Mama! I… ''[The coupling brakes from the cable and the cable car falls into the river]'' I… Aah!
:''[The slash is heard as April cries over Stockman's &quot;death&quot;, the turtles pull the cable getting Casey and April to safety inside the copter]''
:'''Mikey''': Man, you think that's the end of Stockman?
:'''Leo''': We've seen him come back from worse. Only time will tell.
:'''Raph''': Well, I say it good riddance! That psycho's giving us nothing, but grief, ever since we met him!
:'''Donnie''': I dunno, at least he gave us this neat chopper... sort of. Now, let's just find a place to park it.

===''Tale of Master Yoshi'' [4.20]===
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' Honor. Integrity. Bushido. These were the ideals that drove Master Splinter's beloved master: Hamato Yoshi. He had traveled far to reach this castle fortress only to find four Foot elite warriors barring his way. But four or four hundred, it mattered not for on this particular night, Yoshi was driven by a powerful force unfamiliar to him. Hatred. Hatred that burned so bright it threatened to destroy him. Hatred born out of the need for revenge.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Donatello''': I know! Maybe Leo should tell us about the Ancient One.
:'''Raphael''': Yeah, Leo. I want to know the other things you learned on how to kick butt.
:'''Leonardo''': Well, I wouldn't know where to start, but there is one story I think you might want to hear... about Master Splinter's master, Hamato Yoshi.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': It's a story about a girl.
:'''Raphael''': A girl? Does she kick butt?
:'''Master Splinter''': Raphael. Please, continue, Leonardo.
:'''Leo''': Okay. Our story begins long ago in the 1960s. Japan was just getting back on its feet.
:'''Michelangelo''': After an attack by [[Godzilla]]?
:'''Leo''': No. After its defeat in [[w:World War II|World War II]]. It was not uncommon to see young orphaned boys in the streets, begging for food and money.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' So the Ancient One took Yoshi and his friend into his home, and trained them in the ways of ninjitsu, and treated them as if they were his own sons. As they grew into young men, they became closer than brothers, best of friends who do everything together. They even fell in love at the same time, with the same girl - [[w:Tang Shen|Tang Shen]]. They were crazy about her. Tang Shen was also an orphan raised by the Ancient One. It was her loving care that made the Ancient One's house into a home and that often brought unexpected visitors to her kitchen. 
:'''Tang Shen''': Mashimi, no!
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' But Tang Shen saw a hungry innocent creature and, as always, her first thought was to care for it. She decided to keep the curious rat as a pet. Seeing that Tang Shen had grown fond of the hungry little visitor, Yoshi had built a home for the newest member of their family. Although, Tang Shen had captured both the boys' hearts, it was clear that her heart belonged to only one of them - Yoshi.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' But the Ancient One was dead set against it.
:'''Ancient One''':	Ha, no. The Guardians are no place for you. You must ''not'' do this. Yoshi, a different destiny awaits you. Neither of you are ready. You need much more training.
:'''Yukio Mashimi''': Sensei, we are more than ready.
:'''Ancient One''':	In body perhaps, but it is your heart and mind that still need training, my son.
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': The Guardians are an honorable force for good, Sensei. I want to help them.
:''[Tang Shen peers through the doorway into the dojo]''
:'''Ancient One''': No. I forbid you to ''join'' the Guardians. ''[leaves]'' That is my ''final'' word.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' Though his friendship with Mashimi began to diminish, Yoshi's bond with Tang Shen grew stronger than ever, but the coils of jealousy were winding tighter and tighter in Mashimi's soul until... something snapped.
:''[A crack of thunder is followed by rain. Tang Shen lifts her arms to welcome it]''
:'''Yukio Mashimi''': Tang Shen!
:'''Tang Shen''': Oh, Mashimi, you startled me. ''[last words]'' What, what is wrong with you?
:''[Inside his dojo the little rat munches on a crumb when the sound of Tang Shen’s scream cuts the air. The Ancient One is nearby and runs for the door]''
:'''Ancient One''': Tang Shen? ''[runs outside, looking for her]'' Tang Shen! ''[He then spots her prone form]'' Oh no! Tang Shen!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Shredder''': Secure all the exits. Let none escape.
:''[Mashimi, now wearing the garb of the Foot, steps up next to Shredder]''
:'''Mortu''': Mashini! ''You'' have betrayed ''us!''
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': Mashimi, why?
:'''Yukio Mashimi''': How dare ''you'' ask why! ''You'' betrayed ''me!'' We were like brothers, but you had everything and left me with nothing! Now I take everything from you, including your life!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' Yoshi returned to tell Tang Shen all that had happened, only to find out the horrible truth.
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': Tang Shen!? No! '''NO!''' ''[echoes]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[at Shen's grave]''
:'''Ancient One''': This is all my fault. I knew Mashimi had a dark streak in his heart.
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': It is not your fault, Master. It is Mashimi's fault and ''he'' shall pay with his life!
:'''Ancient One''': Be careful, my son. Vengeance is like a splinter that will poison your mind and heart.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': Yukio Mashimi! I have come for ''you!'' Show yourself, ''traitor!''
:'''Shredder''': ''[sits on his throne]'' Mashimi.
:''[Mashimi steps out in front of the stairs leading up to Shredder’s throne]''
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': Mashimi, ''I'' challenge ''you'' to a ''duel'', assassin!
:'''Yukio Mashimi''': A duel!? Ha! You have unknowingly stepped into the lion's den, Yoshi! I do not need to fight you! We outnumber you!
:'''Shredder''': You are mistaken, Yukio Mashimi. You stand alone. Defeat Hamato Yoshi and I will forgive our humiliating retreat from the Utrom base. Only if you defeat Yoshi will I let you live.
:'''Yukio Mashimi''': As you wish, Master. ''[walks over to where Yoshi waits and strikes a defensive posture]'' So, Yoshi, our story comes full circle! It began with the two of us and it will end with just the two of us!
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': This story will only end with one of us, Mashimi!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Hamoto Yoshi''': Well, little one. I will name you Splinter. And together, we will remind ourselves of Tang Shen. Of her beauty, her kindness, and love.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': Well, I think we all know the rest of the story.
:'''Michelangleo''': Man! What a bummer story.
:'''Master Splinter''': Perhaps, Michelangelo, but perhaps not. It not for these events, I would never have been brought to New York.
:'''Donatello''': And the Utroms would never have had to relocate here either, meaning no ooze.
:'''Raphael''': No us.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Present Day Japan. The Ancient One approaches a home. Inside, a gate rises and he proceeds down a long flight of stairs. He enters a large chamber, lit by fire sconces mounted around the center of a circular area. He bows]''
:'''Ancient One''': I have come to plead for the turtles. You must not carry out your designs.
:''[From the darkness, a pair of blue eyes light up. It is one of the Ninja Tribunal]''
:'''Juto-Shisho''': You are too late, Ancient One.
:''[From another side, the bright eyes are green]''
:'''Chikara-Shisho''': We have decided.
:''[Yet a third set of eyes, silver in color, appears]''
:'''Kon-Shisho''': We will judge the turtles’ fate. We will determine whether they will live...
:'''Juto-Shisho''': Or how they will meet their end.
:''[The Ancient One bows]''

===''Return of Savanti'' [4.21-22]===
====Part 1====
:'''Donatello''': ''[Narrating]'' My name is Donatello and right now I can't help but think of an old saying: Be careful what you wish for. All my life, I've been fascinated with what they call &quot;terrible lizards&quot; and &quot;thunder beasts&quot;. Dinosaurs. But now, amazingly, I got my wish. Here I am in the Cretaceous Period, 65 million years ago, finally seeing them with my own two eyes, while running for my life. So be careful what you wish for, or, just like the dinosaurs, you might find yourself facing sudden extinction.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Raphael''': Way to go, sneezy!
:'''Donatello''': I said I was sorry!
:'''Leonardo''': Run!

====Part 2====
:'''Savanti Romero''': ''[Narrating]'' Eons ago, I was on the verge of ultimate power. With the omnipotent Time Scepter, I, Savanti Romero, was going to rule all of time. That is, until Lord Simultaneous thwarted my plan. 
:'''Savanti Romero''': '''NO!'''
:'''Savanti Romero''': ''[Narrating]'' ''He'' turned me into a ''monster'' and ''exiled me'' from null time to Earth's Middle Ages where he hoped never to hear from me again. But instead, I plotted: Summoning all my magic, I tried again to take the time scepter and use it ''against'' Lord Simultaneous. 
:'''Savanti Romero''': Now my freedom shall be at hand.
:'''Savanti Romero''': ''[Narrating]'' But thanks to the interference of those accursed ninja turtles and that foolish timestress Renet, my victory was denied.
:'''Raphael''': Hey, hey, nice swing.
:'''Savanti Romero''': ''[Narrating]'' And Simultaneous exiled me once more, even further in time to Earth's Cretaceous Period, but that did not stop me.
:'''Donatello''': That’s Savanti Romero.
:'''Savanti Romero''': ''[Narrating]'' Again, I gathered my magic and lured my prey back through time. Savanti Romero will not be denied his revenge. The timestress will pay for her meddling. The time scepter will finally be mine. As for the turtles, they have no idea of the changes that are about to befall them.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Renet as she comes to from being knocked unconscious]''
:'''Renet''': Uh. Ngh. [Her eyes open.] Oh, what a terrible nightmare. ''[She spots Romero standing above her]'' Ah!
:'''Savanti Romero''':	We meet again, Timestress, for the last time. I do hope you’re enjoying the view. ''[evil laughing]''
:''[Renet is bound at the wrists and ankles, her bonds attached to four places on a ring of bones which is suspended above a lake. The ring is supported by four arches which are formed entirely from bones that have all tangled together]''
:'''Renet''': Let me go, creep! And give me back ''my'' scepter!
:'''Savanti Romero''': ''Your'' master is a fool to entrust you with such power, and soon, I’ll use that power to ''destroy'' him.
:'''Renet''': So, uh, what do you need me for? I don’t think he’s going to come for me if that’s what you’re...
:'''Savanti Romero''': You think I’m using you as bait? No. My magic needs fuel. The life of an apprentice Timestress for example. ''[laughing and Renet makes a distressed sound]''

===''Adventures in Turtle Sitting'' [4.23]===
:'''Leonardo''' ''[narrating]'': Things are not good, and they're getting worse by the second. We could really use good old Donnie right about now. Ever since Bishop's mutant outbreak began, Don's been the one guiding us through this whole mess. Coming up with all the answers.
:''[Michelangelo gets hit]''
:'''Raph''': Mikey!
:'''Leo''': ''[narrating]'' There have been ''hundreds'' of times we'd've been turtle-waxed... if Don's brains hadn't bailed us out. 
:'''Leo''': ''[sees Raph getting grabbed a monster]'' Raph! 
:'''Leo''': ''[narrating]'' It's too bad Don's not here now, because this is definitely one of those times.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''April''': Now who could that be? ''[She opens the door to find Michelangelo, Leonardo and Raphael standing there]'' Guys! Hey, this is...unexpected.  Guys! Hey, this is...unexpected.
:'''Leonardo''': Sorry, April, but we’re on our way to a possible mutant outbreak at the power plant and—
:'''Donatello''': Achoo! ''[groans, leans against the doorframe, looking weak and with dark bags under his eyes]''
:'''April''': Whoa. Don, you look greener than usual. A lot greener than usual.
:'''Donnie''': I know, I- ''[blows his nose]'' I've picked up this little bug and I haven't been able to shake it. ''[blows nose]'' I was feeling alright, but I just can't handle mutants right now.
:'''Mikey''': Did you figure that out before, or after you barfed in the Battle Shell?
:'''Raph''': Mikey! ''[slaps Mikey in the head]''
:'''Mikey''': OW!
:'''Raph''': ''Adults'' are talking. April, can you keep an eye on Donnie for us?
:'''Donnie''': Achoo! ''[blows his nose]''
:'''April''': Of course Don can stay here. I mean, we weren’t going anywhere anyway.
:'''Casey''': Bro’, you are seriously cramping my style here.
:'''Donnie''': Sorry.
:'''April''': You guys have been on monster patrol for weeks. What’s the plan, clean up all the mutants in Manhattan?
:'''Leo''': Well, no. This outbreak is way more than four turtles can handle. We’re just trying to keep it from spreading.
:'''April''': Well, go get ‘em guys. We’ll watch Don.
:'''Leo''': Donnie, take it easy bro’. ''[The other turtles depart]''
:'''Donnie''': Good lu-uh-uh-achoo! Achoo!
:'''Casey''': Uh! ''[slaps his forehead as Donatello groans]'' Come on, sickly mutant ninja turtle, you better lie down before you fall down. ''[helps Donatello lie down on the couch and then covers him with a blanket]'' There. Comfy?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': Okay, Mikey, you take the left. Don, you cover me on—
:'''Michelangelo''': Uh, Don’s home sick from school today, Leo.
:'''Leonardo''': Right. Raph, you cover me on the right. And remember guys, just contain them, do not splatter them.
:'''Raphael''': We know the drill. Can't have that cream filling spillin' out, infecting other creatures with their freako DNA. The last thing we need is more genetic rejects. I mean, we've already got Mikey.
:''[It's loving brother time!]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[after Donatello mutates]''
:'''April O'Neil''': This is crazy!
:'''Casey Jones''': What do we do?!
:'''April''': It's Don right? Try talking to him!
:'''Casey''': Talk to him, are you nuts!? He's a savage, freaky monster and '''YOU JUST WHACKED HIM IN THE FACE WITH A BROOM!'''
:''[Casey being the voice of reason]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Stockman''': I- I don’t understand. What’s happened? What have you done to me?
:'''Agent Bishop''':	I had your brain recovered from the bottom of New York’s East River after your misguided sabbatical. While I could do without your personality, I do need your brain. The outbreak is getting worse by the minute, and I expect you to use that powerful mind of yours to clean it up.
:'''Stockman''': I- I- I can’t believe... oh. I can’t believe you brought me back this. Why? Why? [He gets off the table and stands on shaky legs before falling.] Why couldn’t you let me finally rest in peace? Why?!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': What was that thing?
:'''Raphael''': And where’s Don?
:'''Michelangelo''': Did that monster get Don?
:'''April''': Guys, that monster is Don.
:'''Michelangelo''': Say what?
:'''April''': That thing you just fought is Don.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leatherhead''': I regret to say... I cannot cure him.
:'''Mikey''': What?! NO!
:'''Raphael''': '''MAN, I AM GONNA TAKE BISHOP AND RAM MY FOOT SO FAR...'''
:'''Leonardo''': Easy, Raph! We'll find cure, but first we got to capture Don before he hurts himself or anyone else.
:''[Raph almost says something inappropriate for kids]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': Oh ugly, mutated-version-of-my-beloved-brother DONATELLO, where are you?! ''[He hears growling]'' Donny?!
:''[Mutant Donatello appears rounds a turn, sees Michelangelo, and charges]''
:'''Mikey''':  Like, ZOINKS!
:''[Michelangelo dodges a swing, leaps over Donatello’s head, and runs. Donatello chases him. Michelangelo catches onto a hole in the ceiling of the tunnel and one handed swings through into the tunnel above. He turns and looks back, but sees no Donatello. Arming his weapon, he walks back towards the hole. Suddenly Donatello bursts through and Michelangelo screams and runs]''
:'''Mikey''': Oh, Humna, humna, humna, humna, humna, humna, humna, humna! WHOA!
:''[mutant Donatello keeps swinging his fists to Michelangelo, who keeps dodging them by swinging back and forward]''
:'''Mikey''': Now I know how a piñata feels! ''[dodge another fist swing]'' AND I DON'T LIKE IT! Whoa, Don! Come on, quit it! ''[Raph and Leo arrive]'' A little help here, guys?
:'''Raphael''': Whoa, mama! Don’s been taking his vitamins. ''[Donatello punches Michelangelo and flings him down at the feet of his brothers]'' I’m really sorry about this, Donny!
:''[He jumps down in front of Donatello and swings at him with his capture claw weapon]''
:'''Leonardo''': Remember, this is Don. Do not hurt him!
:''[Raphael hops around as Donatello tries to slash him]''
:'''Raphael''':	That’s not gonna be a problem, Leo!
:''Donatello straightens and roars. Leonardo kicks his carapace and when Donatello turns, Raphael kicks him. Donatello falls forward onto his hands and knees.''
:'''Leonardo''': Leatherhead, you’re on.
:''[Leatherhead leaps out of hiding and runs towards Donatello, who has risen to his feet. Leatherhead plows into him, grabs and lifts him off his feet. Donatello tries to snap at him. Leatherhead shoves him into the containment unit and Michelangelo and Leonardo slam the door shut. Donatello pounds on the glass as his brothers and Leatherhead look on]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Splinter''': ''[sadly]'' My son.
:'''Leatherhead''': I can sympathize. I know what it’s like to be a monster.
:'''Raphael''': ''[places his hand on Splinter’s shoulder]'' Poor Donny.
:'''Michelangelo''': What are we gonna do, Leo?
:'''Leonardo''': Do? This is Donatello. This is our brother. ''[He flattens a palm on the glass]'' We’re going to hunt down a cure for him, no matter what it takes. No matter what it takes.

===''Good Genes'' [4.24-25]===

====Part 1====
:'''[[w:Leatherhead (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)|Leatherhead]]''': ''[Narrating]'' As we fly through the night, I can't help but ponder: intelligence, reason, even simple thought. Most people take these things for granted. I do not. For I know what it's like to be an advanced mind, trapped in the body of a brute... of a monster. But for once, I am not the monster in question. My friend Donatello is one of the gentlest souls I've ever met, with one of the finest minds I've ever known. But now, thanks to the evil agent Bishop, my friend has been transformed into a thoughtless savage. And I fear that the Donatello I know may truly be lost forever.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Karai''': Mystics, your master has need of you!
:''[Laughter echoes all around her]''
:'''Water Mystic''': ''[voice-over]'' ''Our'' master ''is'' the Shredder. Not ''you'', little girl!
:''[The Earth Mystic materializes atop of podium]''
:'''Earth Mystic''': You ''are'' nothing but a pretender! like the Utrom abomination before ''you''!
:''[The other Mystics appear atop their perches]''
:'''Karai''': You forget your place, Mystics! You serve me now. I hold the same power over you as my father did! All your talk of ancient power. You live in the past. I ''am'' the future and ''you'' will ''obey me''. Find the turtle Leonardo! ''He'' must pay for his crimes ''against'' my father! Do ''you'' hear ''me''?! ''[turns and walks away]'' ''Find him!'' ''[exits the room. As the door closes behind her, the Mystics speaks again]''
:'''Earth Mystic''': Perhaps ''he'' will find ''you''!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leo''': Once we have Bishop, We'll convince him to help Don.
:'''Raph''': Leatherhead and I can handle that part of the plan, we can be very convincing. ''[punches hand]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Bishop''': I must say, I’m surprised to see you. We don’t get a lot of guests here.
:'''Raphael''': Oh, I knew this was too easy. You think they saw the copter?
:'''Michelangelo''': It's Area 51, they probably have a UFO watching us from SPACE!
:'''Bishop''': Not exactly, Michelangelo. We detected the helicopter as it approached because it’s ''my'' helicopter. ''[Baxter Stockman walks up next to him]'' Dr. Stockman took it to New York on ''his'' ill-fated trip.
:'''Raphael''': Stockman? Still alive? I thought we were done with you for good.
:'''Baxter Stockman''': Oh, I wish, but Agent Bishop didn’t see fit to let me rest in peace.
:'''Bishop''': Enough chit-chat. What brings you turtles to my house?
:'''Leonardo''': There’s been an outbreak in New York caused by ''your'' alien invasion force.
:'''Bishop''':	''I’m'' familiar with the situation in New York.
:'''Leonardo''': Don got infected. ''He’s'' been transformed into... into a monster.
:'''Stockman''': Ha, ha, ha, ha! Oh, that’s rich. So much for the smart one.
:'''Bishop''':	Perhaps we can be of aid to one another. What if I told you I could cure your brother?
:'''Leonardo''': Why would you help us?
:'''Bishop''': I would help your brother because I require something from you in exchange.
:'''Raphael''': There is no way we should make a deal with this guy.
:'''Michelangelo''': Don’s in trouble because of Bishop, and he tried to dissect us, remember?
:'''Leonardo''': It may be a deal with the devil, but what choice do we have?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Stockman''': Now open that hunk a' junk.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Scene shift to Donatello, now floating inside one of Stockman’s containment units]''
:'''Dr. Baxter Stockman''': Hmm, Donatello’s body appears to be breaking down at a fantastic rate due to secondary stage mutations caused by the outbreak accelerant. He doesn’t have much time. The animal was right.
:'''Leatherhead''':	''[growls]'' Leonardo, this is wrong. We cannot leave Donatello’s fate to these devils. ''[points at Stockman]'' Stockman can not be trusted. ''[points at Bishop]'' And him. If you only knew what he was capable of.
:'''Raphael''':	Leatherhead’s right, Leo. Bishop’s the enemy! He’s the one that caused the outbreak in the first place.
:'''Bishop''': Stockman created the genetic accelerant on my orders. What you call the “outbreak virus” is an unintended side effect of one of my operations.
:'''Leonardo''': Do you have a cure?
:''[Bishop glances at Stockman, who shakes his head in the negative. Bishop looks back at the group of mutants and grins]''
:'''Bishop''': Yes. But as I said earlier, I need something from you.
:'''Leonardo''': Name it.
:'''Bishop''': A simple errand, really. There is an item I require. A relic that may prove crucial to my work. I want you to retrieve it for me.
:'''Leonardo''': Retrieve it? From where?
:'''Bishop''': New York. In fact, I believe you know the woman who currently holds it. Her name is Karai.
:''[The group reacts with surprise. To Be Continued..]''

====Part 2====
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' A wise man once said: I've got a bad feeling about this. And right now, I know how he feels. Believe it or not, that's my brother Donatello. And right now, he's sick. Really sick. He was scratched by one of Bishop's outbreak mutants, and now he has become a savage, mindless monster. Had it been any of us, we would have looked at Don to save the day. But even with Leatherhead's help, we're no closer to finding a cure. With no other options, we tracked down the one man who might have a cure: the man responsible for the outbreak in the first place: Agent Bishop. 
:'''Bishop''': Welcome.
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' Bishop agreed to cure Don, but for a price. 
:'''Bishop''': There is an item I require, a relic. I want you to retrieve it. 
:'''Leonardo''': From where?
:'''Bishop''': New York. From your friend... Karai.
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' Infiltrating Foot central? It's an impossible mission. But what can we do? Our brother is sick. And there's nothing we won't do to save him. Even if it means... making a deal with the devil.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Agent Bishop''': Comm systems on, secure channel
:'''The Entity''': Ah, Agent Bishop, we are transmitting coordinates to you even as we speak
:'''Bishop''': And in return?
:'''Entity''': We will let you know, will you be retrieving the artifact yourself?
:'''Bishop''': Of cause not, i'll sending in special agents.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leatherhead''': Donatello's condition continues to deteriorate, there's not much time.
:'''Master Splinter''': Doctor Stockman, Agent Bisharp told us you have administer the cure to Donatello.
:'''Baxter Stockman''': To think I sunk so low that unparalleled genius would be used save the life of these freaks, unfathomable.
:'''Leatherhead''': Where is the cure Stockman?
:'''Stockman''': I am pulled sweet oblivion for what? this?
:'''Leatherhead''': Show us the cure NOW!
:'''Stockman''': CURE? you stupid animal, Agent Bishop lied there is no cure.
:'''Splinter''': WHAT?!
:''[Leatherhead growls and his eyes turn green on Stockman]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leo''': April come in
:'''April''': Go leo
:'''Leo''': we've made it to the Foots garbage disposal facility, time for you &amp; Casey to do your thing
:'''April''': Casey's heading in to the power station now, stand by
:'''Casey''': Hey if we gonna put a computer virus in here to shut down the power, how come you're not going in?
:'''April''': Because I don't look like a janitor
:'''Casey''': Gee thanks
:'''Leo''': Keep us posted April, we're moving into position
:'''April''': Roger that
:'''Leo''': Well here the fun starts
:'''April''': All the buildings garbage go through shoots that led to an incinerator
:'''Michelangelo''': We're going in through the furnace, isn't that gonna be hot????
:'''Leo''': It's our only way and that's not all,once through the incinerators we go up a shoots.
:'''April''': Which Karai has secured with a deadly grid of lazers
:'''Leo''': When the power drops we go up the vent, we gotta beat the emergency-power kicking in
:'''Mikey''': Ah, Leo why is the grid still on?
:'''Leo''': Casey, April, cut that power or we're turtles flambe.
:'''Casey''': I've put in the stupid virus but it ain't working!
:'''Leo''': Casey we really need that power out NOW
:'''Casey''': Alright, you stupid computers, we're doing this old school, ''[picks up a computer]'' GOONGALA! ''[throws computer]'', Woo hoo
:'''Leo''': Grids' down

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Karai''': Find out what's going on . . . Leonardo is here, but why?, why would he come here?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''': Good work Casey we're in, April go the phase 3: get to the copter
:'''April O'Neil''': On it
:'''Leo''': remember we get what we need and get out, Ralph you know what you have to do, Mikey you're with me, let's go

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Metal Mystic''': Everything goes as planned my brothers.
:'''Earth Mystic''': Soon we all be free!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[About the mystic Heart of Tengu]''
:'''Karai''': No! Give that to me! You do not know what you are doing!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Karai''': You cannot take that!
:'''Leonardo''': Watch me!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': Auntie Em, Toto, are we home yet?
:'''Raphael''': Up and at ‘em, goofball. ''[He pulls Michelangelo to his feet]'' Casey did it. Let’s go!
:''[The three turtles make a beeline for the hole in the wall]''
:'''Karai''': No! ''[runs towards them]'' Leonardo, ''face me!''
:''[Leonardo turns and draws a sword, but Michelangelo catches him by the arm]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Get in, Get out, right? It's not about Karai, right?
:'''Leo''': ''[sheathes his katana]'' Right.
:''[They climb onto the rubble piled in front of the hole in the wall]''
:'''Karai''': ''Stop them!'' Someone ''stop them!''
:''[All three turtles jump. Karai and her Foot Elite reach the opening, but can only watch as the turtles climb up a ladder dangling from the helicopter]''
:'''Karai''': No! No! ''[drops to her knees]'' '''''NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!''''' ''[echoes]''

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Donatello''': ''[Emerges from a cloud of mist, cured]'' Hey guys, what's up? ''[collapses into Leatherhead's arms]''
:'''Leatherhead''': I have you, my friend.
:''[The other turtles ?]'':
:'''Michelangelo''': Welcome back, bro!
:'''Raphael''': All right! Donnie! Welcome back!
:'''Leonardo''': It’s so good to see you again!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Master Splinter''': Welcome back, my son.
:'''Don''': I hope you guys didn't go through too much trouble for me.
:''[Everyone is silent]''
:'''Michelangelo''': Nah.

===''Ninja Tribunal'' [4.26]===
:'''Leonardo''': ''[Narrating]'' You know, if there's one thing I've learned being a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, is to always expect the unexpected. But with all of our training, and all of our hard work, I'd like to think that we're ready for anything. But sometimes, the unexpected is just a little too... unexpected.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': No, no, I don’t think so. It just doesn’t speak to me. A little to the right. ''[Leonardo and Raphael lift the couch, with Donatello seated on it, and move it]'' No, no, my other right.
:'''Raphael''': I’ll give you another right, Mikey. A right hook.
:'''Donatello''': Guys, let me get up and help. This is just silly.
:'''Leonardo''': No, you stay right there and rest.
:'''Donatello''': But I have rested. I’ve been resting for weeks. I rested while you guys fixed up the lair, I rested while you moved furniture, heck, I’m resting on the furniture you’re moving! I’m done resting.
:'''Leonardo''': It’s just that we don’t wanna take any chances of a relapse.
:'''Raphael''': Yeah, no offense Donnie, but you weren't too much fun when you were... sick.
:'''Michelangelo''': Fun?! ''He'' was a monster. An absolutely, horrible, drooling big nasty-fanged monster! ''You'' tried to eat ''my'' leg!
:'''Donatello''': I’m—I’m sorry, Mikey. Guys, I—I don’t remember ''any'' of that.
:'''Leonardo''': It’s okay, Donny. Come to think of it, we have been cooped up in here for a long time. Who’s up for a little late night entertainment?

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Michelangelo''': Are we sure that Donnie's all better? See the full moon, Donnie? Do you feel the monster inside? The monster taking control?! MWAHAHAHA!
:'''Donatello''': Oh no. I'm- I'm changing! '''RAH!'''
:'''Mikey''': AAH! HELP ME! HELP ME! HE'S TRYING TO EAT MY LEG AGAIN!  AAH!

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[After the enemy ninjas demonstrated their weapon sticks to the Turtles]''
:'''Raphael''': Now maybe it's just me, but I think these guys plan to stick it to us.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Juto-Shisho''': Bow when you enter this sanctuary.
:'''Chikara-Shisho''': We require warriors to combatant, and as pathetic as you are, you eight are our best hope.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:'''Leonardo''':  You expect us to fight each other?
:'''Raphael''': Forget it, bucketheads.
:'''Kon-Shisho''': You WILL fight, or you will be destroyed.

&lt;hr width=50%/&gt;
:''[Back to New York City, the rooftop from which the turtles were kidnapped. Splinter and the Ancient One are searching the rooftop. The Ancient One finds the slashed mask left by the wooden warrior that Leonardo had fought]''
:'''Ancient One''': The Mokusai no Bushi were here. ''[He studies gashes in the rooftop and then points to another area]'' And here, signs of a struggle.
:'''Splinter''': The Ninja Tribunal has taken my sons! Ancient One, you must take me to the tribunal.
:'''Ancient One''': You know that what you ask is simply not permitted.
:'''Splinter''': Permitted or not, I will protect my sons!

==External links==
{{wikipedia|Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003 TV series, season 4)}}
{{Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles}}

[[Category:Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2003 TV series) seasons|4]]
[[Category:Children's television seasons]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about turtles]]
[[Category:American animated television seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>g1eeqa3widbhexa2ax283g87ila95z0</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Bugs and Daffy's Carnival of the Animals</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>224419</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965110</id>
      <parentid>3951061</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:40:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965110</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2142" sha1="m7zbzp12vypt1pa7hc5pk3t8v6i8y0l" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Bugs and Daffy's Carnival of the Animals|Bugs and Daffy's Carnival of the Animals]]''''' is a live action/animated television special featuring the ''[[w:Looney Tunes|Looney Tunes]]'' characters [[Bugs Bunny]] and [[Daffy Duck]] and directed by [[Chuck Jones]]. The special, based on [[Camille Saint-Saëns]]' musical suite [[w:The Carnival of the Animals|of the same name]].
:''Directed by [[w:Chuck Jones|Chuck Jones]]. Written by Chuck Jones and Ogden Nash.''

==Dialogue==
:''[first lines of the special; Bugs and Daffy argue about Camille Saint-Saëns]''
:'''Bugs Bunny''': Saint-Saëns.
:'''Daffy Duck''': Saynt-Saynes.
:'''Bugs Bunny''': Saint-Saëns.
:'''Daffy Duck''': Saynt-Saynes.
:'''Bugs Bunny''': Saint-Saëns.
:'''Daffy Duck''': It's pronounced Saynt-Saynes.
:'''Bugs Bunny''': It is pronounced Saint-Saëns.
:'''Daffy Duck''': Saynt-Saynes.
:'''Bugs Bunny''': Saint-Saëns.
:'''Daffy Duck''': The man's name is Camel Saynt-Saynes
:'''Bugs Bunny''': The man's name is Camille Saint-Saëns
:'''Daffy Duck''': Camille? '''CAMILLE?!''' Who ever heard of naming a name Camille?
:'''Bugs Bunny''': Never the less, Camille ''is'' his name.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Daffy Duck''': I knew rabbits multiply, but this is ridiculous!
:'''Bugs Bunny''': Maybe so, but your basic, modern rabbit multiplies with a computer.

==Cast==
* [[w:Mel Blanc|Mel Blanc]] as [[w:Bugs Bunny|Bugs Bunny]], [[w:Daffy Duck|Daffy Duck]], and [[w:Porky Pig|Porky Pig]].
* [[w:Michael Tilson Thomas|Michael Tilson Thomas]] as Himself.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0074283}}

{{Looney Tunes}}

[[Category:1976 animated films]]
[[Category:1976 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Animated TV specials]]
[[Category:Thanksgiving TV specials]]
[[Category:Short films with live action and animation]]
[[Category:Looney Tunes]]
[[Category:CBS shows]]
[[Category:Films directed by Chuck Jones]]
[[Category:Chuck Jones films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films]]</text>
      <sha1>m7zbzp12vypt1pa7hc5pk3t8v6i8y0l</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sonic the Hedgehog (film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>224499</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965243</id>
      <parentid>3798270</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:45:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965243</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="15834" sha1="grb6ibxusab5m556u00325nq6gl5apx" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Sonic the Hedgehog (film)|Sonic the Hedgehog]]''''' is a 2020 American live-action/CGI fantasy-adventure-comedy film based on the [[Sonic the Hedgehog|video game franchise]] published by Sega. The film is distributed by Paramount Pictures. It also stars {{w|James Marsden}}, [[Jim Carrey]] and {{w|Ben Schwartz}} as the voice of Sonic. In the movie, the blue hedgehog himself teams up with a [[w:Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (8-bit video game)|Green Hills]] sheriff to find his lost rings and escape Robotnik.

:''Directed by {{w|Jeff Fowler}}. Produced by {{w|Neal H. Moritz}}, Toby Ascher, Toru Nakahara and Takeshi Ito. Written by [[w:Pat Casey (writer)|Pat Casey]] and [[w:Josh Miller (filmmaker)|Josh Miller]].''

{{center|'''Try to keep up''' ([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}

== [[Sonic the Hedgehog (character)|Sonic the Hedgehog]] ==
* ''[unrolls from a ball which he'd turned into and disabled Robotnik's vehicle; groans]'' Ugh, I think I had a bonus life.
* ''[sees a smaller vehicle come out of Robotnik's disabled vehicle]'' I think that tank just had a baby.
* Hey, everyone, welcome back to my livestream! Today, we're destroying robots. Step One... ''[plants one of Robotnik's electromagnetic mines on his robot vehicle, causing it to malfunction]''
* ''[after being revived by some smelling salts]'' Gotta go fast! ''[goes around the kitchen at a super fast speed before settling down]'' Where am I? What year is it? Is [[w:Dwayne Johnson|The Rock]] president?

== [[w:Doctor Eggman|Dr. Robotnik]] ==
* ''[unveiling his robot vehicle(s) held inside one another]'' Ever wonder where your tax dollars are going?
* ''[As Sonic keeps defeating and destroying his robots]'' OHHHH! GIVE ME A BIG! FAT! BREAK!!
* What is extraordinary is I have determined the exact height, weight, and spinal curvature of this creature, and my computer cannot find a single match for it anywhere in Earth's animal kingdom. This blackout was not a terrorist attack, and that's no baby bigfoot. This guy... is something else... ''entirely.''

==Tom Wachowski==
* SFPD, pending background check. Paws in the air! ''['''Sonic''': Uh, meow?]''
* That little alien... knew more about being human... than you ever will. His name is Sonic. This was his home. And he was my friend.

== Dialogue ==
:'''Tom''': Okay, pal, you need to start talking right now. Who are you. ''What'' are you?
:'''Sonic''': I'm a hedgehog. I feel like it's obvious. And I'm in big trouble.
:'''Tom''': Oh, you're in big trouble?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Dr. Robotnik''': Are you in charge here?
:'''Major Bennington''': Yes, I am.
:'''Robotnik''': Nope!
:'''Bennington''': My–
:'''Robotnik''': Wrong!
:'''Bennington''': Name–
:'''Robotnik''': I'm in charge!
:'''Bennington''': ''[getting frustrated at Robotnik's interruptions]'' Is Major—
:'''Robotnik''': Me!
:'''Bennington''': Ben–
:'''Robotnik''': ''[whispers]'' I'm in charge. You've never seen anything like this before. This says I'm the top banana, in a world full of hungry little monkeys. Allow me to clarify. ''[makes zipping noise]'' In a sequentially-ranked hierarchy, based on level of critical importance, the disparity between us is too vast to quantify. Agent Stone?
:'''Agent Stone''': The doctor thinks you're basic.
:'''Robotnik''': I'm initiating a sweep sequence. Ten miles in every direction should suffice. ''[glances back]'' Is he still looking at me funny?
:'''Stone''': Yes, he is.
:'''Robotnik''': Tell him to stop, or I'll pull up his search history.
:'''Stone''': If you don't stop looking at the Doctor, he'll take a closer look at–
:'''Bennington''': I'm not deaf!
:'''Robotnik''': And tell him his men report to me now, blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah!
:'''Bennington''': Excuse me? Listen, pal. I don't know if you realize–
:'''Robotnik''': I'm sorry, Major. What was your name?
:'''Bennington''': Benning–
:'''Robotnik''': Nobody cares! Nobody cares. Listen, Major Nobody-Cares, you know why nobody cares who you are? Because nobody cares about your feeble accomplishments. And nobody cares how proud your Mommy is that you're now reading at a third-grade level. Have you finished ''[[w:Charlotte's Web (2006 film)|Charlotte's Web]]'' yet? Spoiler alert: she dies in the end. But she leaves a big creepy egg sac. ''[as his egg-shaped drones emerge]'' Ah, my babies! ''[chuckles]'' Look what came out of ''my'' egg sac! You know what I love about machines? They do what they're told. They follow their programming! They don't need time off to get ''drunk'' and put the boat in the water! ''[to Bennington]'' And ''you'' do what ''you're'' told: stand over there on the edge of your personal abyss, and watch my machines do your job. ''[Bennington steps away with a bitter look]'' Can you feel it, Stone?
:'''Stone''': I can feel it, Doctor.
:'''Robotnik''': ''[sending commands to his drones]'' It's evolution, Stone! It's ''evolution!''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tom Wachowski''': Mr...?
:'''Robotnik''': Doctor. Doctor Robotnik. But my dentist calls me &quot;Rob&quot;.
:'''Tom Wachowski''': Look, uh... Doctor &quot;Robot-skis&quot;, um, I'm sure what you're here for is very serious, but it's got nothing to do with me! You can ask anyone in town. Everyone knows me.
:'''Robotnik''': ''[contemptuous]'' I bet they do. I'm sure you're ''hella'' popular with the Jebs and Merls and Billy Bobs in this glorified gas station rest stop. Bet you go way back to the days of tipping cows and playin' in a jug band! ''[mimes blowing on a bottle and slapping his knee]'' And maybe someday, you'll achieve your goal of getting a Costco card or adopting a Labradoodle, but the reality is, I surpassed everything you're ever going to do before I was a toddler! I was spitting out formulas while you were still spitting up formula!
:'''Tom Wachowski''': I was breastfed, actually.
:'''Robotnik''': Nice. Rub that in my orphan face.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Robotnik:''' ''[to Tom, finding one of Sonic's quills]'' Look at that. I was right. Note the lack of surprise. Shall we try this again? ''[whistles Flight of the Valkyries as one of his egg drone is sneaks into the house and aims its guns at Tom]'' I'm going to give you five seconds to tell me where it is. Five.
:'''Tom''': I don't know what you're talking about.
:'''Robotnik:''' Four.
:'''Tom:''' Hey, tough guy. ''[shows his badge]'' I'm a cop. You're threatening an officer.
:'''Robotnik:''' How can you threaten someone who never existed? Three. Come on. Rack your brain! You might be able to come up with some lame excuse to go on living in two, one!
:'''Sonic:''' ''[speeds out of his hiding place]'' Wait! Don't hurt him!
:''[Robotnik screams in surprise. Taking advantage of his distraction, Tom punches him to the floor.]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[after Sonic disables Robotnik's vehicle]''
:'''Sonic''': Sonic, one! Big tank, zero! I'm sorry, did we get that on camera?
:'''Tom''': How are you not dead?
:'''Sonic''': I have no idea! Do you see me dancing?
:'''Tom''': Yes, I saw you dance.
:'''Sonic''': ''[To the camera on the disabled vehicle]''Is that all you got?
:'''Robotnik''': No, but thank you for asking. ''[a smaller vehicle deploys from the initial destroyed vehicle]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Robotnik screams at Stone's sudden appearance]''
:'''Stone''': I just thought you might like a latte with steamed Austrian goat milk.
:'''Robotnik''': What do I look like, an imbecile? Of course, I want a latte. I LOVE THE WAY YOU MAKE THEM!!!!!!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sonic''': ''[runs west, and after a couple of seconds, comes back, wet, with seaweed on him, and a fish on his head]'' So, as I crashed into the cold, dark waters of the Pacific, I realized a few things. A: I have no idea where I'm going. B: Saltwater stings. C: I shouldn't even be on this planet right now, but I am! Why? Because you ''shot'' me!
:'''Tom''': I know.
:'''Sonic''': ''[gasps]'' YOU SHOT ME!
:'''Tom''': I heard you the first time, you don't have to... pile it on. Good grief.
:'''Sonic''': [[Dumb and Dumber|I am ''wet,'' I am ''cold,'' there's a ''fish on my head!'']] And clearly, I'm not going to be able to do this on my own!
:'''Tom''': ''[looks at Sonic, the fish slowly sliding off his head]'' Alright, get in the truck.
:'''Sonic''': Really? ''[shakes the water and seaweed off of him, causing his fur to poof up]'' You're gonna help me?
:'''Tom''': I guess it's a little bit of my fault that all of this is happening to you.
:'''Sonic''': Not a little bit, entirely. It is ''entirely'' your fault.
:'''Tom''': Okay, it's ''entirely'' my fault. Are you coming?
:'''Sonic''': Yes. ''[shakes his body again, straightening his fur, goes back in Tom's truck]'' Road trip! Wahoo!
:'''Tom''': ''[sighs]'' What am I thinking?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Maddie''': ''[regarding Sonic]'' It talks.
:'''Tom''': Almost constantly.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[in a minivan, a boy and girl tug at a tablet while their mother applies lipstick and their father drives]''
:'''Boy''': It's ''my'' turn!
:'''Girl''': You just had one! It's mine!
:'''Man''': Hey! Stop fighting, or I'm taking that thing away!
:'''Girl''': Yeah, right, Dad.
:''[one of the tank's discs hits the bottom of the minivan, and it spins around. The family screams, and as their car comes to a stop, Tom's truck drives past them. The family looks shocked as the boy hands out the tablet as if motioning for his father to take it]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Robotnik''': ''[facing Sonic, Tom and Maddie with his hovercraft and drones at the Transamerica Pyramid]'' Hello Mr. Wachowski, welcome to San Francisco, I'm Dr. Eggman, I can't believe you, sir, have just been enjoying the clam chowder.
:'''Tom''': It's the government whack-job who keeps trying to kill us, unsuccessfully! Nice of you to swing by on your way to Comic-Con.
:'''Maddie''': What are you wearing, sir?
:'''Robotnik''': It's a flight suit! Designed to modulate my body temperature and reduce drag!
:'''Tom''': Yeah, and yet you still ''are'' one.
:'''Robotnik''': Ooh, good one! You are catching fire, Thomas! Oh, and speaking of heat, I see you've taken on a lover. Does she have a name, or should we just call her &quot;collateral damage&quot;?
:'''Tom''': Hey, watch your mouth unless you want a little more of what I gave you earlier! ''[to Maddie]'' I punched him in the face.
:'''Sonic''': Oh, you punched him right in the face, man, it was awesome!
:'''Robotnik''': The time for talking is over! It's time to push buttons!
:'''Sonic''': Your flying eggs are pretty impressive, [[Sonic Boom (TV series)#Mr. Eggman|Mr. Eggman]], but let's face it: You'll never catch me.
:'''Robotnik''': Confidence: a fool's substitute for intelligence. ''[his drones power up, their weapons pointed at Sonic, Tom, and Maddie]''
:'''Sonic''': That's not good.
:'''Tom''': Uh, Sonic, I know you've got the super-speed and everything, but Maddie and I?
:'''Sonic''': Totally defenseless, probably going to get blown up?
:'''Maddie''': Pretty much, yeah.
:'''Sonic''': Don't worry, I know ''exactly'' what to do.
:''[Sonic speeds behind Tom and Maddie and shoves them off the building. Robotnik looks over the side in surprise, then back to Sonic]''
:'''Robotnik''': I was not expecting that, but I was expecting to not expect something, so it doesn't count.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sonic''': ''[pursued into Paris by Robotnik]'' Coming through!
:'''Mime artist''': ''Sacre bleu!'' ''[ducks under Robotnik's hovercraft]''
:'''Robotnik''': ''Excusez-moi, monsieur!''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Robotnik has apparently killed Sonic, and Tom and Maddie look at his lifeless body]''
:'''Robotnik''': I don't mean to be indelicate here, but somebody should get some ice, to keep the body fresh. He's just a silly little alien. He didn't belong here!
:'''Tom''': That &quot;little alien&quot; knew more about being human than you ever will. His name was Sonic. This was his home and he was my friend.
:''[Sonic, at hearing those words, suddenly revives in a flash of blue electricity.]''
:'''Tom''': ''[to Sonic, referring to Robotnik]'' He's all yours. ''[he and Maddie run to join the rest of the townspeople]'' Everyone, get back!
:'''Sonic''': ''[to Robotnik]'' I think you have something that belongs to me! ''[uses his electric powers to absorb the energy from the stolen quill Robotnik is using to power his hovercraft, facing down Robotnik]'' This is my power, I'm not using it to run away anymore. I'm using it to protect ''my'' friends!
:''[Robotnik puts on his goggles as his hovercraft aims its red lights at Sonic, who then positions to run. Robotnik then presses a button to launch the missiles at Sonic, who dodges them and starts charging at the hovercraft multiple times, inflicting heavy damage in it]''
:'''Robotnik''': Ugh! Now you've done it!
:'''Sonic''': Guess what, Eggman? I'm not leaving Earth. You are! Donut Lord?
:''[Tom picks a ring from Sonic's bag and tosses it behind Robotnik's hovercraft, opening a portal to the Mushroom Planet. Sonic and Robotnik charge at each other. The fight ends with Sonic combining his speed power with his rolling cannonball form to disintegrate Robotnik's damaged hovercraft, sending him and the hovercraft's remains to the portal]''

&lt;hr width&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[a ring portal appears, and Tails, a yellow-orange fox, leaps out while holding a tracking device]''
:'''Tails''': If these readings are accurate, he's here. I found him! I just hope I'm not too late. ''[his tail splits into two, and he leaps off, but his two tails spin like a helicopter's top propeller, and he zooms toward Green Hills]''

== Cast ==
*'''[[w:Ben Schwartz|Ben Schwartz]]''' — Voice of [[w:Sonic the Hedgehog (character)|Sonic]]
*'''[[w:James Marsden|James Marsden]]''' — Tom Wachowski / Donut Lord
*'''[[Jim Carrey]]''' — [[w:Doctor Eggman|Dr. Robotnik]]
*'''[[w:Tika Sumpter|Tika Sumpter]]''' — Maddie Wachowski / Pretzel Lady
*'''[[w:Natasha Rothwell|Natasha Rothwell]]''' — Rachel
*'''[[w:Adam Pally|Adam Pally]]''' — Wade Whipple
*'''[[w:Neal McDonough|Neal McDonough]]''' — Major Bennington
*'''[[w:Lee Majdoub|Lee Majdoub]]''' — Agent Stone
*'''Melody Niemann''' — Jojo
*'''[[w:Tom Butler (actor)|Tom Butler]]''' — Commander Walters
*'''[[w:Frank C. Turner|Frank C Turner]]''' — Crazy Carl
*'''[[w:Donna J. Fulks|Donna Jay Fulks]]''' — Voice of Longclaw
*'''[[w:Colleen O'Shaughnessey|Colleen O'Shaughnessey]]''' — Voice of [[w:Tails (Sonic the Hedgehog)|Tails]]

== External links ==
*{{Commonscat-inline}}
*{{wikipedia-inline}}
{{Sonic the Hedgehog}}

[[Category:2020 American films]]
[[Category:2020 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2020s American animated films]]
[[Category:Japanese computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated action films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction films]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Theatrically released animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Remake films]]
[[Category:coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:Sonic the Hedgehog]]
[[Category:Reboot films]]
[[Category:American robot films]]
[[Category:American films with live action and animation]]
[[Category:Films based on video games]]
[[Category:Animated films based on video games]]
[[Category:Animated films about robots]]
[[Category:Animated films about foxes]]
[[Category:Animated films about friendship]]
[[Category:Animated buddy films]]
[[Category:Films set in Montana]]
[[Category:Films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Films set in Paris]]
[[Category:Films set in China]]
[[Category:Films set in Egypt]]
[[Category:Films based on Sonic the Hedgehog]]
[[Category:Films set on fictional planets]]
[[Category:Road comedy films]]</text>
      <sha1>grb6ibxusab5m556u00325nq6gl5apx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>It's Christmastime Again, Charlie Brown</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>224502</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964963</id>
      <parentid>3962006</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:24:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3964963</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3085" sha1="fg2yf27egax8tu0n49eowfjy34hjysq" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|It's Christmastime Again, Charlie Brown}}''''' is the 36th [[w:Prime time|prime-time]] animated [[w:Television special|television special]] based upon the comic strip ''[[w:Peanuts|Peanuts]]'', by [[w:Charles M. Schulz|Charles M. Schulz]]. It originally aired on the [[w:CBS|CBS]] network on November 27, 1992.

==Dialogue==
:'''Peppermint Patty:''' Marcie, what book were we supposed to read during Thanksgiving vacation?
:'''Marcie''': This is Christmas vacation, sir.
:'''Peppermint Patty:''' Christmas vacation?!? How can I read something during Christmas vacation when I didn't read what I was supposed to read during Thanksgiving vacation?!?
: '''Marcie''': Duck, sir. Easter is coming.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucy:''' Okay, get up! I wanna lie in that beanbag!
:'''Linus:''' Remember when we were all sitting around the Christmas tree, opening our presents? That's when you said it. 
:'''Lucy:''' That's when I said what?
:'''Linus:''' It was beautiful. You said, &quot;Why do we have to be nice to each other only on Christmas? Why can't we be nice to each other every day?&quot;
:'''Lucy:''' ''(stalks away)'' You drive me crazy!
:'''Linus:''' Joy to the world!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sally:''' Tell me about Christmas, Linus. How did all this Christmas stuff start anyway? Except for the part about getting lots of presents - I don't see what all the fuss is about.
: '''Linus:''' Well, this is from the second chapter of Luke...
: '''Sally:''' You know what I hate? I hate shopping!
: '''Linus:''' ''(reading)'' &quot;And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' I haven't gotten anything for my brother for Christmas yet.
: '''Linus:''' &quot;...and lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' Everything costs so much!
: '''Linus:''' &quot;...and the glory of the Lord...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' I don't want to spend a lot.
: '''Linus:''' &quot;...shone round about them, and they were sore afraid.&quot;
: '''Sally:''' Actually, I don't really want to spend any money at all.
: '''Linus:''' &quot;And the angel said unto them...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' I wonder if I could get him something for free.
: ''(Linus gives up and falls back onto the couch in frustration.)''
: '''Sally:''' Is that it? I always thought the Christmas story was longer than that.

==Cast==
* Jamie E. Smith: Charlie Brown
* John Cristiano Graas: Linus van Pelt
* Marnette Patterson: Lucy van Pelt
* Mindy Ann Martin: Sally Brown
* Matthew Slowik: Harold Angel
* Phillip Lucier: Peppermint Patty 
* Lindsay Bennish: Marcie
* Deanna Tello: Peggy Jean/Violet/Patty
* Brittany M. Thornton: Frieda
* Bill Melendez: Snoopy and Woodstock

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0104534}}

[[Category:1992 animated films]]
[[Category:1992 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Animated Christmas TV specials]]
[[Category:Peanuts TV specials]]
[[Category:CBS shows]]
[[Category:Films directed by Bill Melendez]]</text>
      <sha1>fg2yf27egax8tu0n49eowfjy34hjysq</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964964</id>
      <parentid>3964963</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:25:13Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3964964</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3083" sha1="g4ibolvsitq3kvk9p2g5fw6zlqjzb4m" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|It's Christmastime Again, Charlie Brown}}''''' is the 36th [[w:Prime time|prime-time]] animated [[w:Television special|television special]] based on the comic strip ''[[w:Peanuts|Peanuts]]'', by [[w:Charles M. Schulz|Charles M. Schulz]]. It originally aired on the [[w:CBS|CBS]] network on November 27, 1992.

==Dialogue==
:'''Peppermint Patty:''' Marcie, what book were we supposed to read during Thanksgiving vacation?
:'''Marcie''': This is Christmas vacation, sir.
:'''Peppermint Patty:''' Christmas vacation?!? How can I read something during Christmas vacation when I didn't read what I was supposed to read during Thanksgiving vacation?!?
: '''Marcie''': Duck, sir. Easter is coming.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lucy:''' Okay, get up! I wanna lie in that beanbag!
:'''Linus:''' Remember when we were all sitting around the Christmas tree, opening our presents? That's when you said it. 
:'''Lucy:''' That's when I said what?
:'''Linus:''' It was beautiful. You said, &quot;Why do we have to be nice to each other only on Christmas? Why can't we be nice to each other every day?&quot;
:'''Lucy:''' ''(stalks away)'' You drive me crazy!
:'''Linus:''' Joy to the world!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sally:''' Tell me about Christmas, Linus. How did all this Christmas stuff start anyway? Except for the part about getting lots of presents - I don't see what all the fuss is about.
: '''Linus:''' Well, this is from the second chapter of Luke...
: '''Sally:''' You know what I hate? I hate shopping!
: '''Linus:''' ''(reading)'' &quot;And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' I haven't gotten anything for my brother for Christmas yet.
: '''Linus:''' &quot;...and lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' Everything costs so much!
: '''Linus:''' &quot;...and the glory of the Lord...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' I don't want to spend a lot.
: '''Linus:''' &quot;...shone round about them, and they were sore afraid.&quot;
: '''Sally:''' Actually, I don't really want to spend any money at all.
: '''Linus:''' &quot;And the angel said unto them...&quot;
: '''Sally:''' I wonder if I could get him something for free.
: ''(Linus gives up and falls back onto the couch in frustration.)''
: '''Sally:''' Is that it? I always thought the Christmas story was longer than that.

==Cast==
* Jamie E. Smith: Charlie Brown
* John Cristiano Graas: Linus van Pelt
* Marnette Patterson: Lucy van Pelt
* Mindy Ann Martin: Sally Brown
* Matthew Slowik: Harold Angel
* Phillip Lucier: Peppermint Patty 
* Lindsay Bennish: Marcie
* Deanna Tello: Peggy Jean/Violet/Patty
* Brittany M. Thornton: Frieda
* Bill Melendez: Snoopy and Woodstock

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0104534}}

[[Category:1992 animated films]]
[[Category:1992 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Animated Christmas TV specials]]
[[Category:Peanuts TV specials]]
[[Category:CBS shows]]
[[Category:Films directed by Bill Melendez]]</text>
      <sha1>g4ibolvsitq3kvk9p2g5fw6zlqjzb4m</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mark Tredinnick</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>226474</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965184</id>
      <parentid>3460224</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T03:10:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Focus Point 0</username>
        <id>3350175</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Changed hero image</comment>
      <origin>3965184</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9232" sha1="luu8k6lgdnp7obu4c9yod382c4pv9a8" xml:space="preserve">[[File:MarkTredinnick.jpg|thumb|Mark Tredinnick]]
'''[[w:Mark Tredinnick|Mark Tredinnick]]''' (born 1962) is a celebrated Australian poet, essayist and teacher.

Dr Mark Tredinnick OAM, winner of the Montreal International Poetry Prize in 2011 and the Cardiff International Poetry Competition in 2012. He is the author of thirteen books, including four volumes of poetry (Bluewren Cantos, Fire Diary, The Lyrebird, The Road South); The Blue Plateau; The Little Red Writing Book and Writing Well: the Essential Guide. &quot;For twenty years he has taught poetry, grammar, creative nonfiction and business prose in Sydney and around the world. Once upon a time he was a lawyer.&quot;

==Quotes==
“A poem puts your pain and delight back among ‘the family of things.’ For a poem uses language connected to ecosystems of being and meaning and form and sense where one can feel whole, where one’s sorrow has context, where one’s solitude has company. And not merely social.” —Mark Tredinnick
From the intro to A Gathered Distance.

“Each tongue, it has been wisely said, speaks galaxies.
And when a language dies, a world—and all that has
No other being elsewhere—fails; a silence falls
Where there was song, where there was something known no other
Lyric grasps.”––Mark Tredinnick from Litany: An Elegy

&quot;The poet’s pen,&quot; Shakespeare has Theseus say, in A Midsummer Night’s Dream, gives shape &quot;to the forms unknown.’ The poet &quot;gives to airy nothing/ a local habitation and a name.”––Mark Tredinnick from 2014 Newcastle Poetry Prize anthology, Once Wild


“Shaping. Naming. Placing. This is the work of poetry. A good poem is a charged place: a  literate geography, a forest, a field, a city block , a suburb, for instance. A poem is a place made of speech. A poem outs the inner life of what afflicts, affects, addicts a poet, one human heart, one human mind. A poem names what its almost unknowable, says what is almost unsayable, and it makes a small habitation—a tent, say; a car; a library; a boat—of what it says. And in that small locality a reader can sometimes come to know something they have often felt, but have not known how to call forth from within or beyond—have not known how to shape or name or hold or value. Till now.”––Mark Tredinnick from 2014 Newcastle Poetry Prize anthology, Once Wild

“The work of grief’s the hardest work we get/ To do. It is ten thousand miles to go… Hope’s the only harder/ Work I know. The stars in sorrow’s sky.”––Mark Tredinnick from “Grief’s Work”

“A poem is an architecture of utterance—an act of speech become a nest or a pot. What a poem is, is not just what it says or how it sounds, but also how it looks—its form. Most of a poem's poetry is how a poet's language, like an organism, adapts to where it finds itself—to how it improvises in response to how it is constrained by its form.”––Mark Tredinnick from &quot;The Gospel of Mark: What I Believe and How I Work&quot;

&quot;Poems—such small things, like birds and bombs—are a lot bigger than they look; they go off! They make more noise (not to mention mess and other kinds of useful damage) and they travel farther than seems possible. A poem is much larger and wilder, if it’s any good, on the inside than the outside. A poem dances down the cage that keeps it—the cage (the poem’s form) that its making has depended on. What you see is the cage; what you get is the poem escaping it.&quot;––Mark Tredinnick from “The Gospel of Mark: What I Believe and How I Work&quot; 

&quot;I’m generalising, but not, I think, unfairly: poetry tells the big story small; fiction (most fiction) tells a small story big. Robert Bringshurst puts it this way: “thought is a thread, and the raconteur is the spinner of yarns—but the true storyteller, the poet, is a weaver.” Textus, from which we get “text”, means (or meant) “cloth”. The poem is a cloth, then; a textus, woven with pieces of a hundred threads (thoughts and stories and hypotheses and epigrams), amounting, at once, to less than any of them, and more than all of them. Leaving nearly all of what it says unsaid.&quot;––Mark Tredinnick from “The Gospel of Mark: What I Believe and How I Work&quot; 

&quot;A poem is a leaf that tells a book; a page that tells a library. A poem is a hint that nails a thesis to a door.&quot;
––Mark Tredinnick from “The Gospel of Mark: What I Believe and How I Work&quot; 


“Writing is talking tidied by art and set down on paper.” The Little Red Writing Book

“The struggle to improve our sentences is the struggle to improve ourselves.”––Mark Tredinnick from The Little Red Writing Book

“Write with your days the lines/ That run between the stars.”––Mark Tredinnick from “What the Light Tells”

“There is a practice of belonging, and it begins with forgetfulness of self.”––Mark Tredinnick from The Blue Plateau

“I am made of pieces and of the spaces between them where other pieces used to be and no longer are.” ––Mark Tredinnick from The Blue Plateau

“I am a landscape of loss. Most of me is the memory of where else, and who else, and with whom, I have been and no longer am. And so it is with the Plateau; she too, is a landscape of loss. We are not––not I nor this place––ever whole; we are never of a piece. Who we are is how what’s left of us falls back toward some kind of coherence much older than we are.” ––Mark Tredinnick from The Blue Plateau


“Despair like Job’s may be understood, whatever causes it, as a falling out of wonder with the world, out of awe, a catastrophic failure of conviction about one’s own miraculous part in the larger scheme of things. Life loses shape and refuses form; the hearth that held you lets you slip. One is unhoused from one’s days and tortured by one’s nights. One is beyond one’s own or anyone’s reach. My version of Job’s lot has felt like profound disenchantment with myself and my work. Even the world of birds and ridgetops and rivers and trees lost its magic. Each morning I wake and my life is something less than a theoretical proposition. My unhearthing is a spiritual distemper; it is a loss of one’s grip on the meaning of a life, a nihilism to which, perhaps, those of us most dedicated to the making of meaning are most vulnerable. And it falls especially hard on those who never learned how to care for themselves, who never, early, learned to feel what they said they knew—that the nature of the universe is love, and that some of that love is meant for oneself, a birthright, and secure.”––Mark Tredinnick 2018, “Temple of the Word” 

“Lived as a place, not just a story, lived as country, perhaps a life may become more habitable and happy. Perhaps a place is a mind one can learn to share. Perhaps a place is a body one can inhabit and care for as if it were one’s family, one’s lover. One’s self.”––Mark Tredinnick 2018, “Nourishing Terrains”

“Perhaps a place is a mind you can learn to share.”––Mark Tredinnick from “Nourishing Terrains”

“Darkness is the original country, and it is alive with stories.&quot;––Mark Tredinnick from Bluewren Cantos 

“Poetry is for soul making, Keats thought. And he was right. He still is. It still is. How you write is who you are, says Joan Didion. So, who are we and who do we want to be? Poetry's a way to work that out. Each of us. All of us.&quot;—Mark Tredinnick, Meanjin interview, 2014{{fix cite}}

“And with each dialect drowned, each lexicon beached, the world that is a universe of all these knowing realms knows less, the living world grows less alive.”––Mark Tredinnick from “Litany: An Elegy” 

“Most of it is black, and the beginning goes on/ And on.”–– Mark Tredinnick from “What the Light Tells”

“I have a general theory: keep going.”–– Mark Tredinnick from “The Rules for Walking” 

“It’s frightening to contemplate the havoc already at play and terrifying to think about how much worse it could all get and not merely for oneself. If one’s ethics extend beyond one’s self and even beyond the merely human realm, it’s chastening, it’s mortifying, to think that how you have lived your life, how you’ve fuelled your prosperity and ease, has induced a change in the weather the consequence of which could be, already is, massive species extinction including ultimately perhaps our own. &lt;p&gt; We are already living through the sixth mass extinction event we know about in the history of the earth. Much of it is caused by how immoderately we have thrown our weight around, how many habitats we’ve rendered unliveable, how many food chains we’ve cut; but some of it also and most of it in the years ahead will be caused by the changing weather, much of which we seem to have caused too.”––Mark Tredinnick 2012, “A Poet's Guide to Climate Change” 

“Every climate crisis starts at home.” “The Fire &amp; the River &amp; the City &amp; the Bush”––Mark Tredinnick

{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Tredinnick, Mark}}
[[Category:1962 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Poets from Australia]]
[[Category:Essayists from Australia]]
[[Category:Educators from Australia]]</text>
      <sha1>luu8k6lgdnp7obu4c9yod382c4pv9a8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Hindutva</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>226864</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964922</id>
      <parentid>3948359</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:58:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964922</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17677" sha1="elfklo3fuxuhgeptb1mhicl3xcp4mqx" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Path Sanchalan Bhopal-1.jpg|thumb|Hindutva really means, as understood by its advocates, conformity to the idea that India has primarily been a Hindu ''rashtra''. It is not a [[Religion|religious]] [[philosophy]] or a social reform movement. It is a [[political philosophy]] based on cultural chauvinism, which insists that the non-Hindus of India accept their place as &quot;[[Minority group|minorities]]&quot;, whose safety and security will depend on their ability to earn the &quot;goodwill of the majority&quot;. —[[G. N. Devy]]]]
'''[[w:Hindutva|Hindutva]]''' (lit. &quot;Hindu-ness&quot;) is a political [[ideology]] encompassing the cultural justification of [[Hindu nationalism]]. The political ideology was formulated by [[Vinayak Damodar Savarkar]] in 1923. It is used by the [[Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh]] (RSS), the [[w:Vishva Hindu Parishad|Vishva Hindu Parishad]] (VHP), the [[Bharatiya Janata Party]] (BJP) and other organisations, collectively called the [[w:Sangh Parivar|Sangh Parivar]].
__NOTOC__
{{TOCalpha|}}

== Quotes ==

=== D ===
*&quot;Question: I believe you are acquainted with the ideology of the Sangh Parivar.&lt;br&gt;Answer: Yes, indeed, since 30 years. Of course, I have also come across some critical views regarding these organizations. But, at the same time, I find that the Parivar is very much concerned about the preservation of [[India]]'s national identity and [[Culture of India|culture]]. This aspect has impressed me greatly. Frankly, there are in this country people who are infatuated with the western way of life. I have always told my Indian friends that there is no point in neglecting their own rich cultural heritage. As such, any organization working for the preservation of India's traditional values and norms certainly deserves the support of all well-meaning people.&quot;
**[[Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama|Dalai Lama]],  [Interview conducted by S. Suresh in the ABVP conference in Kanpur which appeared in Organiser, November 22, 1992.]

* Hindutva really means, as understood by its advocates, conformity to the idea that India has primarily been a Hindu ''rashtra''. It is not a [[Religion|religious]] [[philosophy]] or a social reform movement. It is a [[political philosophy]] based on cultural chauvinism, which insists that the non-Hindus of India accept their place as &quot;[[Minority group|minorities]]&quot;, whose safety and security will depend on their ability to earn the &quot;goodwill of the majority&quot;. At the heart of the Hindutva ideology is the idea that the good of a majority should also be seen as the good for any minority, and that any assertion of minority rights is essentially a threat and a challenge to the political authority of the majority. Such minorities, therefore, are seen by the Hindutva advocates as anti-national and anti-social. Besides, any attempt by a minority to swell their numbers is seen by the Hindutva votaries as [[aggression]]. Hence, [[w:Conversion_to_Christianity|conversion to Christianity]] or a [[Hindu]] girl’s marriage to a [[Muslim]] or a [[Christianity|Christian]] are seen as undesirable and provocative acts.
** [[G. N. Devy]], &quot;Adivasis and Dalits: Tribal Voice and Violence&quot;, in S. Varadarajan (ed.) ''Gujarat: The Making of a Tragedy'' (2002), 262-263. New Delhi: Penguin.

=== J ===
* The Hindutva of Savarkar was conceived primarily as an ethnic community possessing a territory and sharing the same racial and cultural characteristics, three attributes which stemmed from the mythical reconstruction of the [[w:Vedic_Age|Vedic Golden Age]].
** [[Christophe Jaffrelot]], ''The Hindu Nationalist Movement in India'' (London: Hurst, 1993), p. 27. Quoted in [https://thediplomat.com/2021/01/hindutvas-realism-in-modis-foreign-policy/ &quot;Hindutva’s Realism in Modi’s Foreign Policy&quot;], ''The Diplomat'', January 01, 2021.

*Such is the grip of the misrepresentation of Hindutva in anti-Muslim terms that (even) its proponents, including some leaders of the [[Bharatiya Janata Party|Bhartiya Janata Party]], themselves, speak of it defensively.
**Girilal Jain, Page 106, The [[Hindu]] Phenomenon, {{ISBN|81-86112-32-4}}.

* The Hindutva forces, in their bid to aggravate religious conflicts in the country, argue that [[Hindu|Hindus]] were forcibly converted to [[Islam in India|Islam]] and [[Christianity in India|Christianity]] in the past and therefore they have to be reconverted so as to take them back into the Hindu fold. But such an assertion has no basis in our history.
** [[D. N. Jha]], General President's Address Punjab History Conference, 31st Session 19-21 March 1999. In [https://www.jstor.org/stable/3517941 &quot;Against Communalising History&quot;], ''Social Scientist'', Vol. 26, No. 9/10 (Sep. - Oct., 1998), p. 54.

=== M ===
* In India, in the 1990s, the growth of Hindu nationalism brought extraordinary attempts to eliminate parts of India’s heritage and to rewrite [[History of India|Indian history]]. In 1992, [[Fundamentalism|fundamentalists]], supported by [[right-wing]] Hindu politicians, destroyed a sixteenth-century [[mosque]] at [[Ayodhya dispute|Ayodhya]] in [[w:Northern_India|northern India]] on the grounds that it was built over the birthplace of the [[Hindu god]] [[Rama]]. Encouraged, they declared that they would move on to destroy other Muslim sites, including the [[Taj Mahal]]. This was part of a larger drive to peg India’s identity as exclusively Hindu or, in the word used by the Hindu nationalists, Hindutva. India’s history inevitably became a key component of this. The standard view, based on the evidence available, had been that the fertile [[w:Indus_Valley|Indus Valley]] had housed the [[Indus Valley Civilisation|Harappan civilization]] between about 3000 and 1700 B.C. It was gradually absorbed or disappeared when horse-borne [[Aryan race|Aryans]] moved downward from the north, perhaps as peaceful migrants or possibly as warlike invaders. This did not suit the Hindu nationalists because it implied that an [[Indigenous peoples|indigenous civilization]] had given way to one from outside and that their own culture might have foreign elements. As [[w:Madhav_Golwalkar|Madhav Golwalkar]], the spiritual father of today’s Hindu nationalists, wrote in the 1930s, “The Hindus came into this land from nowhere, but are indigenous children of the soil always, from times immemorial.” Of course, this was an absurdly simplistic view of the ways peoples and civilizations develop and commingle. They are not flies stuck forever the same in amber but much more like rivers with many tributaries.
** [[Margaret MacMillan]], ''The Uses and Abuses of History'' (2008), pp. 78-79 
* [T]he Hindutva project requires a radical, violent rupture between India’s Hindus and those of the hated “other” that it constructs, India’s Muslims and Christians.
** [[Harsh Mander]], [https://thewire.in/communalism/is-india-lurching-into-a-genocide &quot;Is India Lurching Into a Genocide?&quot;], ''The Wire'', Feb 18, 2022.

* It is not that Hindutva supporters equate vastly different phenomena with vastly different consequences, but they also willfully gloss over facts like 80%-90% of VIP (ministers, MPs, MLAs) hate speech has been perpetrated by the BJP, or that the head of the BJP’s IT Cell is the greatest disseminator of the most dangerous and [[w:Fake news in India|fake]] communal propaganda. There is simply no comparison between the ruling party and other parties.
** [[Nissim Mannathukkaren]], ''[https://thewire.in/communalism/delhi-riots-communalism-false-equivalence The Barbarity of False Equivalence]'', 8 March 2020, ''[[w:The Wire (India)|The Wire]]''

* I believe in Hindutva which is based on the age-old concept of &quot;[[w:Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam|Vasudeva Kutumba]]&quot;. I believe mutual respect for one another and cooperation should be the basis for relationships with foreign nations. And I am confident my Hindutva face will be an asset when dealing with foreign affairs with other nations.
** [[Narendra Modi]], in [http://archive.indianexpress.com/news/narendra-modi-my-hindutva-face-will-be-an-asset-in-foreign-affairs/1243097/ &quot;Narendra Modi: My Hindutva face will be an asset in foreign affairs&quot;], ''The Indian Express'', April 23, 2014.

=== N ===
*People ask me about the forces of Hindutva in India. I got into trouble a couple of years ago when I said that with this new kind of self-awareness in India, the [[Hindu]] idea is almost a necessary early, stage. It contains the beginnings of larger, new ideas: the idea of history, the idea of the human family, of India. I hope this self-awareness doesn't stay there, and I don't think it will, but it's necessary. We are dealing with a country that has started from a very low point, a very low intellectual point, a low economic point. When people start moving, the first loyalty, the first identity, is always a rather small one. They can't immediately become other things. I think that within every kind of disorder now in India there is a larger positive movement. But the future will be fairly chaotic. Politics will have to be at the level of the people now. People like [[Jawaharlal Nehru|Nehru]] were colonial-style politicians. They were to a large extent created and protected by the colonial order. They did not begin with the people. 
**V.S. Naipaul, A Million Mutinies, V.S. Naipaul, India Today Date: August 18, 1997 [https://web.archive.org/web/20050313091232/http://www.caribbeanhindu.com:80/VS_Naipaul.htm]

* Hindutva militants have truly sinister intentions of denigrating religious minorities.
** [[Meera Nanda]], {{Cite book|url=https://www.jstor.org/stable/40279263|title=Hindu Triumphalism and the Clash of Civilisations|date=2009|publisher=Economic and Political Weekly|page=111}}

=== P ===
* The [[Gandhi|Mahatma]] was a harmonizer of communities and people. Inclusion and not separation was his way. ''Hindutva'' disagreed with [[Mahatma Gandhi|Gandhi]] on his interpretation of [[Hinduism]]. The agendas of ''Hindutva'' though strong on the issues of self-identity and self-definition, have tended to be separatist. The [[w:Vaishnavism|Vaishnava]] that he was, Gandhi believed in treating &quot;the suffering of others as his own.&quot; From such a point of view, it seems clear that the intolerance of ''Hindutva'' will not permit the people of India to build a compassionate and just social order.
** [[Anthony Parel]], [https://www.google.com/books/edition/Gandhi_Freedom_and_Self_rule/sErf-DzVI9EC?hl=en&amp;gbpv=1&amp;pg=PA133 ''Gandhi, Freedom, and Self-rule''] (2000), Lexington Books, p. 133.

* The Hindutva movement as it has emerged is, almost in a classical sense, Fascist in its ideology, Fascist in its class support, Fascist in its method, and Fascist in its program. All the ingredients of a Fascist ideology are present in it: the attempt to unify the majority under a ''homogenized'' concept, 'the Hindus'; a sense of grievance against alleged injustices done to this homogeneous group in the past by an excluded homogeneous minority; a sense of cultural superiority vis-à-vis this minority; a reinterpretation of history exclusively in these terms; a total rejection of contrary evidence, of dispassionate analysis, of the scientific method, indeed of rational discourse; and above all an appeal to the so-called homogeneous majority in passionate, blood-curdling, and essentially male chauvinist terms to 'stand up', 'assert their manhood', 'show that it is blood and not water that flows in their veins', all of which amount to an incitement violence, and result in actual violence, against the minority group. … Its appeal is based not on the dreams of a better or more prosperous or meaningful future, but upon hatred.
** [[Prabhat Patnaik]], [https://www.jstor.org/stable/3517631 &quot;Fascism of our times.&quot;] ''Social Scientist'', vol. 21, no. 3/4, 1993, pp. 69–70.

* Just as in [[Great Depression|the 1930s]], [...] [[w:Late capitalism|contemporary world capitalism]] too has reached [[Coronavirus recession|a dead-end]] and cannot continue as before. [...] The [[Ruling class|ruling formation]] in India, however, is totally oblivious of the world conjuncture. The dead-end of [[neo-liberalism]], which is visible to even [[bourgeois]] thinkers in the metropolis, is invisible to our ''Hindutva'' brigade.
** [[Prabhat Patnaik]], ''[https://www.newsclick.in/Capitalism-COVID-19-Modi-Govt-Policies-Hindutva-Global-Economy-Neo-Liberalism The World At Crossroads]'',  29 May 2020, ''NewsClick''

* Hindutva ranked their enemies in order – Muslims, Christians and [[Communism in India|Communists]]. It applauded [[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]]’s “national” pride and invoked the [[Nazism|Nazi]] model of dealing with minorities. Like Hitler, Hindutva believed in [[Racism|race superiority]] and dreamt of [[World domination|world dominance]]. Yesterday it collaborated with the [[British Raj|British]]. Today it flaunts the tricolor it had openly denigrated, pretends to uphold a [[Constitution of India|Constitution]] it wanted replaced with the [[Laws of Manu]], a [[Misogyny|misogynist]], [[Brahmin|Brahminical]] text, and is busy selling every available public asset to the nearest foreign or Indian crony. Without stating it in words, their [[murder of Gandhi]] in 1948 added a new enemy to the list – Hindus who stood against the project of Hindutva.
** [[Anand Patwardhan]], [https://scroll.in/article/1005159/anand-patwardhan-if-hindutva-is-hinduism-then-the-ku-klux-klan-is-christianity &quot;Anand Patwardhan: If Hindutva is Hinduism then the Ku Klux Klan is Christianity&quot;] (Sep 12, 2021), ''Scroll.in''.

=== S ===
* Central to Hindutva as a mass phenomenon (or for that matter to Fascism) is the development of a powerful and extendable enemy image through appropriating stray elements from past prejudices, combining them with new ones skillfully dressed up as old verities, and broadcasting the resultant compound through the most up-to-date media techniques. The Muslim here becomes the near-exact equivalent of the [[Judaism|Jew]]. … Racist attitudes, finally, are neatly encapsulated in the very recent coinage of the formula 'Babar ki aulad'. Alleged descent from [[Babur|Babar]] is sufficient to damn, no overt misdeed is really required… just as once in [[Fundamentalist Christianity|fanatical Christian]] circles all Jews stood condemned because of what their ancestors had supposedly done at the time of the [[w:Crucifixion_of_Christ|crucifixion of Christ]].
** [[Sumit Sarkar]], [https://www.jstor.org/stable/4399339 &quot;The Fascism of the Sangh Parivar.&quot;] ''Economic and Political Weekly'', Vol. 28, No. 5, 1993, p. 165.

* Hindutva’s organisational apparatus is the oldest, the most continuous, and certainly the most multifarious political formation in the world devoted to the service of mobilising hatred.
** [[Tanika Sarkar]], [https://www.google.com/books/edition/_/GGxvEAAAQBAJ?hl=en&amp;gbpv=1&amp;pg=PT8 ''Hindu Nationalism in India''] (2022). Quoted in [https://thewire.in/books/book-review-the-hindutva-growth-story &quot;Book Review: The Hindutva Growth Story&quot;], ''The Wire'', August 21, 2022.

* Hindutva is not a word but a history. Not only the spiritual or religious history of our people as at times it is mistaken to be by being confounded with the other cognate term Hinduism, but a history in full. Hinduism is only a derivative, a fraction, a part of Hindutva. … Hindutva embraces all the departments of thoughts and activity of the whole Being of our Hindu race.
** [[Vinayak Damodar Savarkar]], ''Hindutva: Who Is a Hindu?'' (fifth Edition, 1969), pp. 3-4.

* In the fascist Hindutva imagination, the Indian Muslims are continuously reviled as [[Pakistan|Pakistani]] &quot;fifth columnists,&quot; as &quot;enemies of the nation&quot; and so on, and their patriotism is said to be suspect. The Muslim as the menacing &quot;other&quot; occupies a central place in Hindutva discourse, and this has been used to legitimize large-scale [[Islamophobia|anti-Muslim]] violence.
** {{cite book|author=[[Yoginder Sikand]]|editor1-last=Abu-Rabi'|editor1-first=Ibrahim|title=The Blackwell Companion to Contemporary Islamic Thought|date=2006|page=88}}

=== T ===
* Pre-modern Hinduism had its warts—big and small—as do all religions, but its subtleties were richer than what is now being thrust on its believers. Hindutva is in many ways the antithesis of Hinduism, and aims to create a society that is narrow, bigoted and inward looking, in which the co-existence with those that differ, such as the minority communities of various kinds, is becoming increasingly impossible, as demonstrated by the frequency of communal riots.
** [[Romila Thapar]], ''The Past as Present : Forging Contemporary Identities Through History'' (2014)

* Hindutva claims to represent indigenous Indian thought opposed to western interpretations of [[Indian religions|Indian religion]], traditions and culture. The claim is that colonial scholarship used its understanding of Indian culture for political purposes to justify colonialism. Yet Hindutva is doing precisely the same by reformulating Hinduism along the lines suggested by [[Colonialism|colonial]] interpretations in order to facilitate its use in political mobilization. It uses colonial constructions of the Indian past such as the theories of [[James Mill]] and [[Max Müller|Max Mueller]] to further its programme of political control. The exploitation of history becomes a significant dimension of its attempt to appropriate the understanding of the past.
** [[Romila Thapar]], ''The Past as Present : Forging Contemporary Identities Through History'' (2014)

== See also ==
* [[Hindu nationalism]]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia-inline}}

[[Category:Political ideologies]]
[[Category:Hindu nationalism]]</text>
      <sha1>elfklo3fuxuhgeptb1mhicl3xcp4mqx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Berenstain Bears (2003) (season 1)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>227289</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965086</id>
      <parentid>3963480</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:39:14Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-31994-37</username>
        <id>3332129</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* The Slumber Party / The Homework Hassle [1.8] */</comment>
      <origin>3965086</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="75360" sha1="5nneswy87td2lc2135ttzcorsieeuv8" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons''': [[The Berenstain Bears (2003) (season 1)|1]] [[The Berenstain Bears (2003) (season 2)|2]] [[The Berenstain Bears (2003) (season 3)|3]] | [[The Berenstain Bears (2003 TV series)|Main]]
----

The following is a list of quotes from the first season of ''[[The Berenstain Bears (2003 TV series)|The Berenstain Bears]]''.

==Season 1==
===''Trouble at School / Visit the Dentist'' [1.1]===
:''[first lines of the series, echoing the book the episode was based on]''
:'''Brother Bear''': When a problem at school is kept secret too long, it can grow until a cub thinks everything is wrong!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sister --after bringing Brother make-up math homework-- sees Brother still playing with his dinosaur collection.]''
:'''Sister Bear''': If you can hold a [[w:dinosaur|dinosaur]], you can hold a [[w:pencil|pencil]]! 
:''[Sister puts Brother's make-up work on his bed and angrily walks away. Echoing from the book, &quot;While Brother was having fun at home, his fellow classmates --in Teacher Bob's class-- were hard at work. They learned addition, subtraction and multiplication. And now, they were learning about division&quot;. For multiplication and division, they first learned about their multiplication times tables through 9 --counting by 1's, 2's, 3's, 4's, 5's, 6's, 7's, 8's and 9's-- and now they were learning multiplication and division facts through 9. But Brother, he has not done any of his multiplication and division homework since Sister brought him it on Monday.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Teacher Bob''': If you all take your seats, we can get started on the math test. Please remember to show me all your calculations on the margin.
:''[The quiz is about division. It's about division facts --1 through 9. For multiplication, Brother's class learned multiplication facts through 9. Now on division, it was division facts through 9. In the book version, it says, &quot;Then when Brother got back to school, Teacher Bob said to him and his class, 'I certainly hope you studied that math folder. Because we are going to have a quiz'. 'A quiz?', asked Brother. 'About what?'. 'About division of course', said Teacher Bob as he handed out the quiz packets&quot;.]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Teacher Bob''': Goodbye! I'll see you tomorrow. 
:''[Even though most of the students did great, there was one &quot;F&quot; and that was Brother. Teacher Bob glares at Brother. Then it cuts to Brother. That is, who looks guilty after failing the division quiz. Brother may have gotten every single problem wrong or cheated with another student's test.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Uh oh! This can't be good!
:'''Teacher Bob''': I'm afraid it isn't, Brother.
:''[Teacher Bob then reveals the division quiz. There is a number &quot;0&quot; on the test. Teacher Bob wrote on the division quiz, '''VERY POOR! MUST BE SIGNED BY PARENT!'''. That is, and in other words, &quot;Brother not only got every problem wrong or cheated. But he also got a great big '0'&quot;. In the book, and echoing from it, the actual page reads, &quot;The quiz was a disaster! Not only did Brother get every problem wrong! But Teacher Bob wrote on the paper ''''VERY POOR! MUST BE SIGNED BY PARENT!''''&quot;.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': '''[[w:zero|ZERO]]??'''
:''[After Brother says this, Teacher Bob is concerned. He asks if Brother studied for the division quiz. That is, as he asks Brother...!]'' 
:'''Teacher Bob''': Didn't you do the worksheets I sent home with Sister?
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, I was pretty sick. ''[tries to talk in between coughs]'' It took a lot out of me of that flu bug. 
:'''Teacher Bob''': Hmm?
:'''Brother Bear''': But I think I'm going to be okay now. And I can't wait to get those worksheets done!
:'''Teacher Bob''': I'm glad to hear that.
:'''Brother Bear''': Well... I guess I better catch the bus.
:'''Teacher Bob''': Oh, one more thing. Please have your parents sign that test and bring it back to me tomorrow.
:'''Brother Bear''': Yes, sir.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Brother looks at his test which was about division.]''
:'''Brother Bear''':  Even the [[w:flu|flu]] doesn't feel this bad.
:'''Mama Bear''': How was your day at school?
:'''Brother Bear''': We had a math test today, and...
:''[Sister starts sick coughing and sneezing.]''
:'''Sister Bear''': I don't feel very well, Mama.
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, dear. ''[Sneezes]''
:'''Papa Bear''' I don't like the sound of that.
:'''Mama Bear''' You're running a temperature.
:'''Sister Bear''': I think I caught Brother's cold.
:'''Papa Bear''': Yes, that doesn't surprise me. ''[to Brother]'' And now, what were you saying, son?
:'''Brother Bear''': Me? Oh, it was nothing really. Sister's more important right now. ''[to Sister]'' Here, Sister. Let me carry your stuff.
:'''Sister Bear''': Thank you.
:'''Papa Bear''': And I'll carry you.
:'''Mama Bear''': I'll put on some chicken soup.
:''[Mama and Papa are unaware that Brother cheated or didn't pass his division quiz. And now, they're trying to take care of Sister.]'' 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': '''I just won't go to school, And I Won't give my test back to the teacher! not my fault i was sick!''' ''[takes his division quiz out of his backpack]'' '''PHOOEY ON SCHOOL! PHOOEY ON MATH! PHOOEY ON EVERYTHING!''' ''[folds his division quiz into a paper airplane and sails it out so neither him nor his family can see it and it lands near an old log.]'' Oh no! What am I supposed to do now? I can't go to school! And I can't go home! 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The scene cuts to Gramps and Gran's dining room. Brother is at their table having milk and chocolate chip cookies.]''
:'''Gran''': Dear me! This paper has more wrinkles than I do. 
:''[Gran flattens out the division quiz --which Brother had made into a paper airplane-- and rolls it out with her rolling pin. That is, to get the wrinkles out of the quiz.]''
:'''Gran''': Well? I guess that is about the best I can do. 
:'''Brother Bear''': It is way better than it did, ''[looks at the zero on his test.]'' but it still has a big fat zero on it. 
:''[By that saying of Brother, the division test looks better than it did. That is, but it still has a great big &quot;0&quot;.]''
 
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Mama and Papa look at the division quiz. And they find a great big &quot;0&quot; on it.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[shows the zero on his division test]'' I told you it was pretty bad.
:'''Papa Bear''': Pretty bad? Can it get any worse than zero?
:'''Gramps''': Well, it can get worse when you don't tell your parents and don't get on the [[w:school bus|school bus]].
:'''Brother Bear''': That's for sure.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' You should have come to us right away.
:'''Brother Bear''': I know, I'm sorry.
:'''Papa Bear''': At least you're coming to us now.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Cousin Freddy''': I had no idea so many gooey gums can fit into one bag.
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, this way I'll have enough to last a while.
:'''Cousin Freddy''': A while? You'll have enough to last until next year.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': I don't want Dr. Bearson to yank my tooth out with his big yankers!
:'''Mama Bear''' Big yankers? Who told you that? ''[angrily galres at Papa. Papa nods his head no as he didn't tell Sister about the dentist pulling out her teeth with yankers. Then they all turn to Brother.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': I was only kidding. I didn't think she'd believe me. ''[chuckles]'' Sorry, Sister.
:'''Mama Bear''': Dr. Bearson isn't going to yank out your tooth with yankers. ''[to Sister]'' Your tooth will fall out on its own.
:'''Brother Bear''': I bet that's a relief. Huh, Sister? Well, I'm going over to Freddy's for a while.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[stops him]'' Not so fast! Sister's loose tooth doesn't explain why you didn't want any oatmeal chewies.
:'''Papa Bear''' Yes, you usually eat two or three at a time.
:'''Brother Bear''': I had a little [[w:toothache|toothache]], but it's feeling much... ''[his tooth starts to hurt.]'' better now. Ow!
:'''Mama Bear''': How long have you had this toothache?
:'''Brother Bear''': Since this morning when I was eating a gooey gum.
:'''Mama Bear''': More gooey gums?
:'''Papa Bear''': No wonder you have a toothache. They're so sweet that even your truly papa bear wouldn't eat one.
:'''Mama Bear''': I better phone Dr. Bearson and make an appointment right away.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': You'd better make sure you put your tooth under your pillow tonight.
:'''Sister Bear''': Why?
:'''Brother Bear''': Why? For the [[w:tooth fairy|tooth fairy]] of course.
:'''Sister Bear''': No way! This is my first tooth! I'm keeping it!
:''[Mama Brother and sister start laughing]''

===''Mama New Job/Mighty Milton'' [1.2]===
:'''Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz''': ''[together, chanting, and chorusing a &quot;teasing&quot; comment about Milton]'' '''MILTON, MILTON!'''
:'''WATCH HIM GO!'''
:'''WATCH HIM DRIBBLE OFF HIS TOE!'''

&lt;hr width”50%”/&gt;
:''[After Too-Tall the bully. And his two friends Smirk and Skuzz teased Brother in the classroom, school yard, and on the bus back home from school --which was the chant &quot;Brother, Brother!/Teacher's Pet!/Now he is the principal's pet!&quot;, &quot;Brother, Brother!/He's so good!/He does everything he should!&quot;, and &quot;Brother, Brother!/He's so sweet!/The sweetest cub you ever met!&quot;-- Brother befriended a new cub named Massive Milton. And after Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz teased Milton, Too-Tall teases Brother again and he --Too-Tall-- says...!)'''
:'''Too-Tall''': ''[to Brother]'' '''WELL?! LA-DI-DAH! BROTHER BEAR --THE PRINCIPAL'S PET-- IS STICKING UP FOR MASSIVE MILTON!'''
:''[This line --said by Too-Tall-- was also from the &quot;Too Much Teasing&quot; book.]'' 

&lt;hr width”50%”/&gt;
:'''Woman 1''': These [[w:quilt|quilts]] will look fabulous on my cub's bed. How much are you asking for them?
:'''Woman 2''' Excuse me! But I think I saw them first!
:'''Sister Bear''': '''NO! (YOU CAN'T BUY THESE QUILTS!) MAMA MADE THOSE FOR US!''' ''[Sister and Brother both hug the quilts]''
:'''Mama Bear''': I'm sorry. But these quilts aren't for sale. I'm just airing them out.
&lt;hr width”50%”/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': I've got a job! I'm going to start my own quilt-making business!
:'''Papa Bear, Brother Bear and Sister Bear''': Huh??

===''Go To School / The Week at Grandma's'' [1.3]===
:'''Sister Bear''': What's this?
:'''Brother Bear''': Things we studied in mathematics. That's long division. It looks a lot harder than it is. It's nothing to worry about.
:'''Sister Bear''': Nothing to worry about? It's just like Too-Tall said! It's too hard!
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh dear, you've worked yourself into a tizzy!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Do you know what a [[w:synonym|synonym]] is?
:''[Sister mistakenly believes Brother and says &quot;cinnamon&quot;]''
:'''Sister Bear''':  Uh-huh. It's my favorite spice. Like synonym [[w:toast|toast]] and synonym [[w:bun|buns]]...
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[laughs]'' No, that's&quot;[[w:cinnamon|cinnamon]]&quot;. I said &quot;synonym&quot;. It's word that's spelled differently, but it means the same thing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' Too busy? 
:'''Sister Bear''': I promised Brother I'd make a [[w:picture|picture]].
:'''Brother Bear''': You can make me a picture at kindergarten, Sister. They've got lots of [[w:paint|paint]], [[w:crayon|crayons]] and every [[w:color|color]] you can think of.
:'''Sister Bear''': But I want to hear my [[w:storybook|storybooks]]!
:'''Mama Bear''': They have lots of books at kindergarten, too. With stories you haven't heard before.
:'''Sister Bear''': I was going to build something with my [[w:building blocks|blocks]].
:'''Papa Bear''': They have enough blocks to build a [[w:castle|castle]] at kindergarten. That was one of Brother's things about school.
:'''Brother Bear''': There's a tub of blocks bigger than you.
:'''Mama Bear''': What do you say, Sister? Can you give kindergarten a try?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': And so, you went with Brother on the [[w:bus|bus]] for your first day of school.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Is it all right if I sit here?
:'''Lizzy''': Uh-huh!
:''[When they get to school]''
:'''Miss Honey Bear''': Welcome to Bear Country School. My name is Miss Honey Bear, and I'm your new kindergarten teacher! Would you like to come inside and meet your new classmates?
:''[When it's time for recess, all the cubs go out to play. Mama Bear comes to school to see how Sister is doing. The cubs who are heading out to recess bump into Mama.]''
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[realizes]'' Mama, why are you here?
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, I just thought I would stop by to see how you were doing.
:'''Sister Bear''': I'm having fun! Brother was right, they do have lots of paint colors, more than a hundred! 
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' Is that right?
:'''Sister Bear''': And they do have a big tub of blocks, just like Papa said. Lizzy and I built a giant castle!
:'''Mama Bear''': Lizzy?
:'''Sister Bear''': Uh-huh, she's my new friend.
:'''Lizzy''': New best friend.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[shakes hands with Lizzy]'' Pleased to meet you, Lizzy.
:'''Lizzy''': Hi, we're having [[w:recess|recess]]!
:'''Mama Bear''': And what do you do at recess?
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[to Lizzy]'' Do you know?
:'''Lizzy''': This is my first one! 
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' I'll help you get started! Come on over to the [[w:swing|swings]] and I'll push you.
:'''Sister  Bear''': Okay!
:'''Lizzy''': That's a good idea!
:''[The flashback ends]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Huh?
:'''Sister Bear''': [[w:suitcase|Suitcases]]?
:'''Mama Bear''': So our reservations for Grizzly Mountain Lodge are all set? Thank you so much, see you soon.
:'''Brother Bear''': Reservations?
:'''Cubs''': We're going on vacation!
:'''Mama Bear''': Well, actually, it's a second [[w:honeymoon|honeymoon]].
:'''Brother Bear''': Still sounds like fun.
:'''Sister Bear''': Mmmm! Especially the [[w:honey|honey]] part.
:'''Papa Bear''': I haven't seen these in ages. I wonder if my serve is still... ''[falls to the ground]'' Ow!
:'''Brother Bear''': Papa, are you okay?
:'''Sister Bear''': Maybe you should just let Brother and me play [[w:tennis|tennis]] on the honeymoon.
:'''Brother Bear''': You and Mama can keep score.
:'''Mama Bear''': Sorry, sweeties, but honeymoons aren't for cubs. Honeymoons are special trips that couples go on after they get married. It's an old tradition.
:'''Papa Bear''': Grizzly Mountain Lodge is where Mama and I went on our first honeymoon.
:'''Brother Bear''': But what about us?
:'''Mama Bear''': Well, you're going on a special trip of your own.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[gasps]'' Is it Grizzly World?
:'''Sister Bear''': Is it Honeycomb [[w:amusement park|Amusement Park]]?
:'''Mama Bear''': You're going to Grandma's.
:'''Cubs''': ''[shocked]'' Gran's?
:'''Brother Bear''': That should do it. [[w:board games|Board games]], [[w:book|books]], my [[w:yo-yo|yo-yo]]. I wonder if I should bring my chemistry set.
:'''Sister Bear''': I'm bringing [[w:puzzle|puzzles]], [[w:coloring book|coloring books]] and [[w:teddy bear|teddy bear]].
:'''Papa Bear''': Beep beep. Coming through! Hey, what's all this doing out here?
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, we are going to Gran's for a whole week. We need to keep busy.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' Come on, now. You always have fun at Gran's house without all this stuff!
:'''Brother Bear''': When we go for one afternoon, maybe. ''[whispers to Mama Bear]'' and Gran and Gramps are old.
:'''Sister Bear''': Maybe they'll want to take naps all day. 
:''[Papa closes the trunk of the car]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Papa, what about our [[w:toy|toys]]?
:'''Papa Bear''': You won't need all those. You're going to have too much fun with Gran and Gramps. I wonder if the [[w:lodge|lodge]] still has [[w:canoe|canoe]] rides on the [[w:lake|lake]].
:'''Mama Bear''': And [[w:live music|live music]] in the dance hall.
&lt;hr width&quot;50&quot;%=&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Now for my favorite part of lunch. [[w:dessert|Dessert]].
:'''Sister Bear''': Oh no! Gran forgot the honey for the honey buns!
:'''Gramps''': No, she didn't. Gran makes the buns, And I make the honey, with some help of course.
:'''Brother Bear''': Watch it, Gramps! They'll sting you!
:'''Gramps''': I do this all the time. First, you smoke the [[w:bee|bees]] out to calm them down, then you gently pry the hive open, loosen up a frame and pull out the honeycomb.

===''The Trouble With Pets / The Sitter'' [1.4]===
:'''Brother Bear''': Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
:'''Sister Bear''': A [[w:horse|horse]]?
:''[Brother and Sister gallop likes horses]''
:'''Brother Bear''': We can ride it to school!
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[slows them down]'' Whoa! Nobody said anything about a horse.
:'''Mama Bear''': A horse would need a fenced corral with lots of room to run. Our yard's just too small.
:'''Papa Bear''': And do you know how much a horse eats? More oats than I can afford!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': I want a pet that's warm and cuddly.
:'''Brother Bear''': If you want something warm and cuddly, you should just get your old blanket.
:'''Sister Bear''': Well, if you want a pet that's cold and slimy, you should get some slime!
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[walking to them]'' What's all the commotion about?
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[waking to Papa and Sister]'' None of the pets that Sister wants are any fun!
:'''Sister Bear''': All the pets that Brother wants are too weird!
:'''Brother Bear''': They are not!
:'''Sister Bear''': '''ARE TOO!'''
:'''Papa Bear''': Now settle down. We'll go to the [[w:pet store|pet store]]. Maybe they'll have something you can both agree on.
:'''Brother Bear''': The pet store? Okay.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The scene dissolves to Mama Papa Sister and Brother in the family car on the way to the pet store]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Now remember, cubs...
:'''Cubs''': We know.
:'''Brother Bear''': Nothing that eats bugs.
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[laughs]'' Or smells bad.
:'''Brother Bear''': Hey! ''[sees Farmer Ben running around.]'' What's Farmer Ben doing?
:'''Papa Bear''': It looks like his [[w:chicken|chickens]] are on the loose. Let's give him a hand. 
:''[Papa parks the car so they can see what Farmer Ben is doing]''
:'''Farmer Ben''': Come back here! Uh... Heal! Oh boy. Sit!
:'''Brother Bear''': Heal?
:'''Sister Bear''': Sit?
:'''Papa Bear''': Farmer Ben must be trying to train his chickens.
:''[A litter of puppies race towards Brother and Sister]''
:'''Brother Bear''': [[w:puppy|Puppies]]!
:'''Sister Bear''': Aw! They're so cute!
:'''Farmer Ben''': These pups are getting to be quite a handful. I'm going to have to put an ad on the paper to see if I can find them good homes.
:'''Brother Bear''': Can we have one? Please?
:'''Papa Bear''': I don't know.
:'''Mama Bear''': We'll think about it.
:'''Sister Bear''': What do we have to think about?
:'''Papa Bear''': Well, for one thing, there are the vet bills to consider.
:'''Mama Bear''': Not to mention dog tags and licenses. All of that costs money.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[hands Mama the puppy]'' We can save up our allowance money to help pay for it.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[the puppy licks Mama]'' Oh my. It is kind of cute.
:'''Papa Bear''': We'll take it.
:'''Sister Bear''': Yay! We're getting a puppy!
:'''Brother Bear''': Let's call him Prince.
:'''Farmer Ben''': ''[chuckles]'' That's a fine name for a boy dog, but I'm afraid the one you're holding is a little lady.
:'''Sister Bear''': Maybe that's what we should call her, Little Lady.
:'''Brother Bear''': Wait until you see your new home! You're really going to like it!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': What are you doing here?
:'''Brother Bear''': What ''am'' I doing here? What are ''you'' doing here? You're supposed to be looking after Lady.
:'''Sister Bear''': No I'm not! I won the [[w:coin toss|coin toss]], remember?
:'''Brother Bear''': That was for cleaning up her accident.
:'''Sister Bear''': It was for cleaning up her accident and looking after her!
:'''Brother Bear''': No it wasn't.
:'''Sister Bear''': Yes it was!
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, if we aren't looking after her, who is?
:''[Little Lady has made a mess in the living room. She's pulling one of her toys from underneath a flower vase. The cubs run home and say...!]''
:'''Sister Bear''': No, Lady!
:'''Brother Bear''': Stop!
:''[The flower vase falls on the ground and breaks. The cubs look at the mess Little Lady made.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': This isn't good!
:''[Mama and Papa return home]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Hello!
:'''Papa Bear''': Hi! 
:''[Mama and Papa also look at the mess Little Lady made.]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, the [[w:sofa|sofa]]!
:'''Papa Bear''': My [[w:chair|chair]]!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The scene cuts to outside where it's raining outside. Little Lady is sent to her doghouse as punishment for wrecking the living room.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Maybe we should have asked for a [[w:goldfish|goldfish]] instead. At least we wouldn't have gotten it into so much trouble.
:'''Sister Bear''': It's not fair to Little Lady. We should be the ones out in the doghouse.
:''[Mama and Papa are in the kitchen. Papa is fixing the broken flower vase, and Mama is sewing up a ripped pillow.]''
:'''Papa Bear''': This [[w:vase|vase]] is in more pieces than a [[w:jigsaw puzzle|jigsaw puzzle]].
:'''Mama Bear''': What could have gotten Little Lady into doing such a thing?
:'''Brother Bear''': We know what got into her.
:'''Mama Bear''': What do you mean?
:'''Brother Bear''': We weren't exactly looking after her when she got into trouble.
:'''Papa Bear''': You weren't looking after her?
:'''Sister Bear''': She didn't get outside for any exercise all afternoon. Not even a walk.
:'''Brother Bear''': That's why she wrecked the living room. She was just trying to have some fun.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' Looking after a puppy is a round-the-clock job.
:'''Papa Bear''': It isn't something you can just put off until later when it's more convenient.
:'''Brother Bear''': We're sorry
:'''Sister Bear''': I guess we aren't very good puppy owners.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' Maybe you can make it up to her.
:'''Mama Bear''': How about giving her a snack when you bring her back in.
:'''Sister Bear''': We can bring her back in the house?
:'''Brother Bear''': You mean it?
:'''Mama Bear''': After hearing what really happened, I think she deserves another chance.
:'''Brother Bear''': Come on, Sister! Let's go tell her the good news!

===''Too Much TV / Trick or Treat'' [1.5]===
:'''Papa Bear''': What's this? A lovely lady dining alone? May I join you for lunch, Mrs. Bear?
:'''Mama Bear''': Be my guest. ''[Papa kisses her]'' The cubs aren't interested.
:'''Papa Bear''': Oh? Where are they?
:'''Mama Bear''': Eating in front of that television. It used to be a treat, but now they do it every day.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' Give it to me!
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' No way! It's my turn to choose! 
:''[The scene cuts to the cubs in the living room, and they're fighting about what TV shows they should watch.]'' 
:'''Sister Bear''': '''WE'RE NOT WATCHING &quot;BEAR WRESTLING&quot;!'''
:'''Brother Bear''': '''THERE'S NO WAY I'M WATCHING &quot;LITTLE TREEHOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE&quot;!'''
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' '''OKAY, THAT'S IT!'''
:''[Brother and Sister jump from their fighting, drop the TV remote and the TV remote flies out of their hands.]''
:'''Cubs''': ''[screaming]''
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[catches the TV remote]'' '''NO MORE TV FOR A WEEK!''' 
:''[Mama turns off the TV with the remote.]'' 
:'''Brother Bear''': What?
:'''Sister Bear''': But, Mama!
:'''Mama Bear''': No, sir! I mean it.
:'''Sister Bear''': Papa, Mama told us we can't watch TV for a whole week!
:'''Papa Bear''': Your Mama's got a point. You two cubs have been watching far too much television lately. Now, if you don't mind, I'm just going to catch some of the hockey playoffs. ''[Mama takes the TV remote from Papa.]'' Huh?
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[to Papa]'' You too, Papa! ''[then to the rest of her family]'' For once, the whole family is going to be TV-free!
:'''Papa Bear''': Oh...!
:'''Brother Bear''': Oh...!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[sees a wrestling show while in his workshop]'' Oh! I didn't see that coming!
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[off-screen]'' And you didn't see me coming!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': I think we should end the TV-ban on account of bad weather.
:'''Mama Bear''': Rain or no rain. No TV for a week means no TV for a week.
:'''Brother Bear''': What are we supposed to do for fun?
:'''Mama Bear''': How about cracking open a good book?
:'''Brother Bear''': Okay. ''[grabs a television guide]''
:'''Mama Bear''': That's the television guide.
:'''Brother Bear''': But it's still reading. ''[looks at the television guide]'' Oh, guess what movie is on TV tonight!
:'''Sister Bear''': What?
:'''Brother Bear''': Honey, I shrunk the cubs!
:'''Sister Bear''': That's a classic! ''[to Mama]'' Mama, you have to let us watch that!
:'''Mama Bear''': I'm sorry, Brother and Sister, but the only way to break the &quot;TV-watching-habit&quot; is to keep the TV off.
:'''Cubs''': Aw!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': We'll go here, and here.
:'''Sister Bear''': Don't forget this house. They always give out Crispy Squares.
:'''Brother Bear''': Mm-mmm, love those Crispy Squares.
:'''Mama Bear''': What are you cubs up to?
:'''Brother Bear''': It's a trick-or-treat map.
:'''Sister Bear''': We're figuring out which houses to visit tonight.
:'''Brother Bear''': We're going to Farmer Ben's house and then Mrs. Grizzle's; she usually makes special Halloween cookies.
:'''Sister Bear''': And then Teacher Jane's. She gives out good stuff.
:'''Brother Bear''': And we'll go to Dr. Grizzly's house, even though she gives out healthy snacks.
:'''Sister Bear''': Just to be polite.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[laughing]''
:'''Sister Bear''': And then Gramps and Gran. They always have lots of candy for us.
:'''Mama Bear''': Hmm, it looks like you missed Widder Jones' house.
:'''Brother Bear''': Oh, we did that on purpose.
:'''Mama Bear''': You did? Why?
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[to Mama; talking about Widder Jones]'' Because she's a witch!
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, nonsense! She's very sweet and kindhearted.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[confused]'' Mama, I'm talking about the Widder Jones who lives on Crooked Lane. That Widder Jones.
:'''Mama Bear''': Yes, I know who you mean. We take a quilting class together. She's very friendly and helpful.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[whispering to Sister Bear]'' Until she turns you into a statue.
:'''Mama Bear''': In fact, I saw her at the market today. She's preparing a very special treat for all the trick-or-treaters. And when you get home, I want to hear that you've paid Widder Jones a visit. Remember not to judge someone by their appearance.
:'''Sister Bear''': So are we going there?
:'''Brother Bear''': I guess so. You knock, and I'll wait by the road.
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' No way!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Skuzz''': We're going to put the trick back in Trick or Treating.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Mama wouldn't be friends with a witch now, would she?
:'''Brother Bear''': Hmm, I suppose you're right.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': It’s Too Tall and his boys! They’re not here for the Treats, just the tricks!
:'''Widder Jones''': I understand perfectly! And I am more than happy to oblige. Watch this!
:''[Widder Jones pulls a rope, Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz pop out of a bush and Vampire bats swarm them.]''
:'''Too Tall''': Watch out! Vampire bats! They’re after us!
:'''Smirk''': Aah! Get away!
:'''Skuzz''': Aah! They’re gonna get us!
:'''All''': ''[laughing]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Wow! That’ll teach them!
:'''Lizzy''': But, they’re still coming back!
:'''Widder Jones''': Maybe they wants some more tricks!
:''[Widder Jones pulls another rope, Too-Tall and his gang pop out from behind a tree, as ghosts appear.]''
:'''Too-Tall and his Gang''': Ghosts! ''[screaming]''.
:'''All''': ''[Laughing]''.
:'''Widder Jones''': So, Brother. How would you like to play the final trick!
:'''Brother Bear''': Okay.
:'''Widder Jones''': Just turn this on and watch the fun!
:'''Brother''': 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! ''[Flicks a switch]''
:'''Skuzz''': This isn't much fun as I thought it would be!
:''[Suddenly, skeletons appear out of nowhere.]''
:'''Too-Tall and his Gang''': ''[screaming]''.
:'''Too-Tall''': Let’s get out of here! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES. Let's go home. Mommy Daddy?
:'''All''': ''[laughing]''.

===''The Trouble With Money / The Double Dare'' [1.6]===
:'''Mama Bear''': Sometimes when people are so busy working hard, they can forget about other important things in their lives.
:'''Papa Bear''': Even mamas and papas forget about very important things.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': I guess I've been too busy.
:'''Cousin Fred''': That's a surprise!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Brother, Brother!
:'''Brother Bear''': What's the matter, Sister?
:'''Sister Bear''': Too-Tall and his gang, took my [[w:jump rope|jump rope]]! I tried to get it back. But they wouldn't give it to me!
:'''Brother Bear''': '''THREE AGAINST ONE! AND YOU'RE HALF THEIR SIZE! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!'''
:'''Sister Bear''': You think you can get it back for me?
:''[Brother --angrily-- runs off to the park to find the too-tall the bully. And two friends Smirk and Skuzz.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[about the bully]'' '''JUST TRY AND STOP ME! (AND THEY BETTER GIVE IT BACK OR ELSE!)'''
:''[He goes off --snarling to himself-- after saying this. And he threatens that he's going to let Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz have it if they don't give Sister back her jump rope. In fact, he thinks about letting Too-Tall the bully. And-his two friends Smirk and Skuzz-- have it right now.]'' 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Too-Tall the bully. And his two friends Smirk and Skuzz had stolen Sister's jump rope-- is jumping with Sister's jump rope. That is, until Brother showed up.]''
:'''Too-Tall''': Tell you what, Brother! You want it back? Come and get it!
:'''Brother Bear''': All right! I'll do that!
:''[Brother attempts to cross the log bridge over a stream.]''
:'''Skuzz''': ''[to Brother about his attempts to cross the log bridge over the stream]'' '''ONE FALSE MOVE AND YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE A CHILLY SWIM!'''
:''[As Skuzz says this, he says it as if to mean he wouldn't care if Brother had a &quot;chilly swim&quot;, caught a cold from it, and got called out sick so he wouldn't have to go to school. All he does care is that he knows Brother might not make it across the log bridge to retrieve Sister's jump rope from Too-Tall.]''
:'''Too-Tall''': Look, guys! I think he's chicken!
:''[Smirk and Skuzz imitate chickens.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': I AM NOT CHICKEN!
:'''Too-Tall''': Then we dare you to cross!
:'''Brother Bear''': You're on!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The scene cuts to Brother, Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz at a field of sheep.]''
:'''Too-Tall''': Get ready, Brother. We're going to take a little shortcut across this field.
:'''Brother Bear''': What's so fun about that?
:''[Too-Tall Smirk and Skuzz laugh.]''
:'''Too-Tall''': There's a [[w:ram|ram]] in the flock with a bad temper.
:'''Smirk''': With fast legs.
:'''Skuzz''': And big horns.
:'''Smirk''': They don't call him Bruiser for nothing.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' Maybe I'll take the long way around.
:'''Too-Tall''': That's the chicken route.
:''[Smirk and Skuzz imitate chickens.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': I told you. I'm not chicken!
:'''Too-Tall''': Then we dare you to take the shortcut!
:'''Brother Bear''': Alright! I'll go!
:'''Too-Tall''': That's what we like to hear!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Farmer Ben --unnoticed at first-- uses himself like a scarecrow. Brother Bear and the big cubs --Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz-- think he's a scarecrow --and that there's a real scarecrow in the watermelon patch-- in the spite of that. That is, although they fail to notice him. He uses himself as a scarecrow --having his eyes shut, arms spread out, feet together, and his face like a scarecrow's face-- in the middle of the watermelon patch. That is, as if there really is a scarecrow in his patch. So Farmer Ben --striking the pose-- pretends to be a scarecrow. Brother --after picking out the biggest and greenest skinned watermelon-- gets the melon off the vine, breaks the stem off of it, and picks it up. But when he picks up the melon, Farmer Ben moves a little by smiling. Then he opens his eyes, makes his mouth into an &quot;O&quot; shape, and --offscreen-- undoes his scarecrow pose. Then he --as if returning back to his normal self-- runs up to Brother and catches him.]''
:'''Farmer Ben''': '''GOTCHA!'''
:''[Brother Bear tries to run away --only to be tightly grabbed by Farmer Ben.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': '''HELP! LET ME GO!'''
:''[The scene cuts to Too-Tall the bully. And his two friends --Smirk and Skuzz. When they see that Brother is caught by Farmer Ben, they run away.]''
:'''Too-Tall''': '''RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!'''
:''[Too-Tall and his friends run away screaming. Farmer Ben does not notice Too-Tall the bully. And his friends --Smirk and Skuzz-- but he talks to Brother about the dee-double dare incident. And he --Farmer Ben-- is unaware that Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz are invading his melon patch again.]''
:'''Farmer Ben''': '''BROTHER BEAR! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING STEALING [[w:watermelon|WATERMELONS]] WITH TOO-TALL AND HIS NO GOOD GANG?!'''
:''[As Farmer Ben says this, he wants to know what in the Earth Brother Bear --stealing Too-Tall-- is doing with that watermelon.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': First they dared me, then they double dared me, '''AND FINALLY, THEY DEE DOUBLE DARED ME!'''
:'''Farmer Ben''': That dee double dare is so hard to resist.
:'''Brother Bear''': I wanted to walk away. But then they called me chicken! I'm sorry, Farmer Ben.
:'''Farmer Ben''': Well, it's okay, Brother. It's not your fault. I'm not going to call in and tell your parents about this one watermelon stealing mistake.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Brother comes back to Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz with a watermelon slice that Farmer Ben gave him.]''
:'''Too-Tall''': Brother?! You got away with it! And you got the watermelon.
:'''Skuzz''': Way to go.
:'''Smirk''': You're the man!
:'''Too-Tall''': Come on, we're going to have more fun at the Widder Jones' house.
:'''Brother Bear''': No way.
:'''Too-Tall''': ''[as he and his gang stops walking]'' Oh, really? well, I dare you to come with us.
:'''Brother Bear''': Not this time.
:'''Too-Tall''': Okay, then, I double dare you.
:'''Brother Bear''': Nope. Not interested.
:'''Too-Tall''': What the matter? Chicken?
:''[Smirk and Skuzz imitate chickens.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': I'm not [[w:chicken|chicken]], and I'm not a [[w:sheep|sheep]] either. 
:'''Too-Tall''': Okay Brother...! '''I DEE DOUBLE DARE YOU TO COME WITH US TO THE WIDDER JONES'S HOUSE!'''
:'''Brother Bear''': That stuff may have worked before, but it won't now! 
:''[But Brother --considering the consequences if he goes--  says &quot;No&quot;. That is, after he says this. In the spite of that, he heads back to the house.]'' 
:'''Brother Bear''': See you later. I'm going home.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Farmer Ben''': ''[To the trios Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz]'' '''TOO-TALL!'''
:''[Farmer Ben, he approaches the gang.]''
:'''Farmer Ben''': ''[continues]'' '''IF I CATCH YOU OR ANY OF YOUR GANG IN MY WATERMELON PATCH AGAIN, YOUR PARENTS ARE GOING TO HEAR FROM ME! NOW GET ON HOME!'''
:'''Smirk''': ''[stammers heavily]'' We're sorry, Farmer Ben.
:'''Skuzz''': ''[also stammering heavily]'' Thank you, Farmer Ben. It'll never happen again.
:'''Too-Tall''': Please don't tell our parents!
:'''Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz''': ''[All screaming]'' MOMMY DADDY? 
:'''Farmer Ben''': ''[chuckles]'' Those cubs make my chickens look tough.
:''[In the book adaptation, it was Two-Ton Grizzly --Too-Tall's papa-- who saved Brother. The narration of the page reads, &quot;He looked like Too-Tall. But he was much, much, much bigger. It was Too-Tall's papa Two-Ton Grizzly. 'Wha, wha, what is up, Pop?', asked Too-Tall. 'What is up', growled Two-Ton, 'it was a little phone call that I had from Farmer Ben about you!'. 'And', he added as he turned to the gang, 'if I hear about any more shenanigans, all of your parents are going to hear from me! Now get on home!'&quot;. But in the cartoon, Farmer Ben saved Brother. And he was the one who talked to Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz about the dee-double dare incident. However, in both adaptations, the &quot;warning&quot; phrase was the same --Two-Ton in the book/Farmer Ben in the cartoon-- which was, &quot;...all of your parents are going to hear from me!&quot;. In this version --the book-- Farmer Ben said, &quot;TOO-TALL, SMIRK, AND SKUZZ! IF I EVER CATCH YOU IN MY WATERMELON PATCH AGAIN, ALL OF YOUR PARENTS ARE GOING TO HEAR FROM ME! NOW GET ON HOME!&quot;.)

===''Out For The Team / Count Their Blessings'' [1.7]===
:'''Lenny''': Wouldn't it  be funny if Sister made the team and you didn't?
:''[Brother falls into a pond. Sister Lenny and Lizzy rush over to him]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Are you okay, Brother?
:'''Brother Bear''': Yes.
:'''Lenny''': Smooth move, Brother!
:'''Brother Bear''': I won't have to worry about [[w:pond|ponds]], [[w:chicken|chickens]], and baseball-eating [[w:goat|goats]] when I make the [[w:cardinal|Cardinals]]!
:'''Lenny''': You mean ''if'' you make the Cardinals.
&lt;hr width= &quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Why did Sister sign up for baseball tryouts anyway? Why couldn't she be good at something else? Baseball's my game, not hers.
:'''Sister Bear''': Hey! I thought you couldn't lift your arm!
:'''Brother Bear''': Huh? Oh no. It's my left arm that hurts.
:'''Sister Bear''': No, it isn't.
:'''Brother Bear''': Yes, it is. I should know it's my arm.
:'''Sister Bear''': I'm going to ask Mama. She'll remember.
:'''Brother Bear''': Wait, wait. ''[sighs]'' Okay, I was faking.
:'''Sister Bear''': You were? Why?
:'''Brother Bear''': If you really want to know, it's because i'm afraid you're going to make the team and not me.
:'''Sister Bear''': Do you really think I'm that good?
:'''Brother Bear''': You really improved this season.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': Well, Mama. It feels good to have raised two star athletes!
:'''Mama Bear''': It sure does, Papa.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': I know what I'm going to have to listen to when Sister gets home: &quot;Gee, Mama, Lizzie has so many Bearbie dolls. She even has Cruise Ship Bearbie with outfits. Why can't I have more Bearbies than one? And that's just Lizzie.&quot;
:'''Papa Bear''': Hmm, talking to yourself, huh? Certainly not a very good sign. You're being silly.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[sighs]'' You're right. I am being silly. But Sister is playing Bearbies with Lizzy again and I know exactly what's going to happen when she gets home.
:'''Papa Bear''': Oh, what's that?
:'''Mama Bear''': It's the same every time. She complains she doesn't have all the things her friends have. With Lizzie, it's Bearbies. With Anna, it's a phone in her bedroom. And Queenie has a TV and a phone in her room.
:'''Papa Bear''': Hey, I don't even have a TV in my room! Hmm. But Sister does have a Bearbie and a whole lot of things her friends don't have.
:'''Mama Bear''': I know, but she just thinks about what she doesn't have.
:'''Papa Bear''': And I suppose it won't be as much different with Brother when he gets home from Cousin Fred's.
:'''Mama Bear''': We'll hear all about the video games Freddy has.
:'''Papa Bear''': Right, but he won't talk about the soccer ball or action figures he does have.
:'''Mama Bear''': Never mind the large pile of comic books up in his room.
:'''Papa Bear''': Nope, he won't mention those at all.
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, you missed a spot.
:'''Papa Bear''': Hey! How did I end up with this job?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': Cubs... Cubs... Cubs!
:'''Mama Bear''': Listen to yourselves. All you can do is complain about what you don't have.
:'''Papa Bear''': What about being thankful for all the things you do have?
:'''Cubs''': Huh?
:'''Mama Bear''': It's called counting your blessings.
:'''Sister Bear''': Blessings?
:'''Brother Bear''': Like what?

===''The Slumber Party / The Homework Hassle'' [1.8]===
:'''Queenie''': Did I hear you say you're having a [[w:slumber party|slumber party]]? Can I come?
:'''Lizzy''': Sure you can come. What's one more?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sister arrives to Lizzy's house for her slumber party and rings the doorbell. Lizzy opens the door with a teenage bear named Cindy.]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Hi, Lizzy! I... ''[looks at the Cindy]''  Who are you?
:'''Lizzy''': Hi, Sister. ''[introducing Cindy]'' This is Cindy.
:'''Cindy''': Hello.
:'''Sister Bear''': Did you invite her too?
:'''Lizzy''': No. My mama and papa have gone out tonight. So Cindy is babysitting.
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[gasps]'' Does that mean there's no slumber party??
:'''Cindy''': Mr. and Mrs. Bruin said a slumber party will be okay since it's only a few girls, and I thought it would be fun. We used to have sleepovers all the time when I was a cub. There used to be a lot more giggling than sleeping.
:''[The doorbell rings]''
:'''Lizzy''': Hi, Stacey. Hi, Karen.
:'''Stacey''': Hello, Lizzy.
:'''Cindy''': Stacey? Karen? I thought you it was Anna and Millie who were coming.
:'''Lizzy''': Anna and Millie.
:'''Sister Bear''': And Stacey and Karen.
:''[The doorbell rings again]''
:'''Queenie''': Hi, I'm Queenie.
:'''Cindy''': How many girls did you invite?
:''[The scene cuts to the living room where the cubs are hanging out]''
:'''Linda''': Tag, Gwen! You're it!
:''[Linda and Gwen are playing tag, and they bump onto a stool with a picture frame and a clock. They almost fall, but Cindy catches them.]''
:'''Cindy''': Please no running in the house!
:'''Lizzy''': [[w:popcorn|Popcorn's]] ready!
:'''Queenie''': Hmm, pretty good! Have some!
:''[Queenie starts throwing popcorn at Lizzy and Lizzy throws the popcorn back]''
:'''Lizzy''': Have some more, Queenie!
:'''Sister Bear''': I don't think you should throw that anymore.
:''[Lizzy and Queenie throw popcorn at Sister and they start a popcorn fight.]''
:'''Cindy''': No throwing!
:''[The cubs are having a pillow fight and Millie accidentally knocks over Sister.]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Hey! No fair!
:''[The cubs look shocked about what happened. Sister smiles regardless and joins in the pillow fight.]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Take that!
:'''Cindy''': Please don't hit each other! I know it's in fun, but it is not very....
:''[Sister hits Millie with her pillow must be ripped and Queenie opens a soda aluminum can and it fizzies.]''
:'''Queenie''': Uh-oh!
:'''Stacey''': Don't just let it fizz, Queenie!
:''[Queenie sprays the soda on Stacey.]''
:'''Queenie''': Whoa!
:'''Stacey''': Hey! Stop it!
:''[Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz burst in]''
:'''Too-Tall''': It looks like we arrived just in time! The party's just getting started!
:''[The cubs start jumping on the couch, Since Sister realizes it looks so much fun, she decides to join in.]''
:'''Smirk''': I love a parade!
:'''Cindy''': Can you please turn the music down?
:'''Too-Tall''': I can't hear you! The music's too loud!
:'''Cindy''': That's what I mean! Turn it down!
:'''Too-Tall''': What?
:'''Cindy''': ''[grunts in frustration.]'' '''QUIET!''' 
:''[Mr. and Mrs. Bruin arrived home. They're were terrified to find out the mess that Too-Tall, Smirk, Skuzz and the girls made. Then they glare at the Sister, Lizzy, the other girls, and --the bullies-- Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz. Sister and Lizzy guiltily shrug. The scene cuts to outside at nighttime. The sleepover was cancelled, Mr. and Mrs. Bruin called the cub's parents offscreen, Lizzy was sent to bed, and Mama Bear came to take Sister home. The mothers of Sister, the other girls, and --the bullies-- Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz --who attended the sleepover at Lizzy's house-- they scowl at them. That is, as the viewer sees the mothers scowling at them when they pick them up. Echoing from the book, the book version says, &quot;Well, things calmed down pretty quickly after that. The party was cancelled, parents were called, Lizzy was sent to bed - and an angry and disappointed Mama Bear came to take Sister home&quot;. As they walk home from Lizzy's house and into the night...!]'' 
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[scolds Sister]'' Sister, I am very angry and disappointed! 
:''[The scene cuts to the treehouse as Mama leads Sister into the treehouse.]'' 
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[continues]'' You are grounded, young lady! One day in your room and one full week in the house!
:''[After Mama leads Sister inside, Sister sadly walks upstairs to her room. Echoing from the book, Sister was doubly grounded. That is, meaning that she was in her room for one day and in the house for one full week. In the book version, it says, &quot;Sister was grounded and sent to bed - doubly grounded, which meant she had to stay in her room for a day and in the house for a week.&quot;.]''
:'''Papa Bear''': That bad, huh? 
:'''Mama Bear''': You should've seen the place! Popcorn stuck to everything, [[w:juice|juice]] spills all over the [[w:carpet|carpet]], [[w:furniture|furniture]] knocked this way and that! It was an absolute disgrace! Everything I said about privilege and responsibility! In one year and out the other!
:'''Papa Bear''': Sister does have to share the blame. But it sounds like there were quite a few at this slumber party. Hmm, maybe it was one of those situations where one thing led to another and things got out of control. I’m sure it wouldn't have gotten out of hand if the Bruins had been home. 
:'''Mama Bear''': If we knew they were going out, we could’ve suggested that Sister attended a sleepover some other time or that the girls had the sleepover here. 
:'''Papa Bear''': Hmm, but we didn’t. It was our responsibility to call them. And part of the responsibility that comes with the privilege of having cubs.
:'''Mama Bear''': So ''we’re'' partially to blame.
:'''Papa Bear''': I guess both privilege and responsibility go for parents as well as for cubs. 
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[out of her room]'' Mama? I know you're really mad. And I know that what I did was wrong. But that's why I need to be not grounded, or maybe just for a little while tomorrow?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The girls make it up by cleaning the living room. Sister, Lizzy, and the other girls make it up. As for Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz, they were grounded by their parents. And they were forced to stay in their rooms for one day and in their treehouses until next Monday. They could only leave their houses to go to school and see their friends during school hours. Sister still makes up for it. In the meantime, Mr. and Mrs. Bruin call Sister and the other girls's parents for a clean-up after they caused the vandalism in their living room from the sleepover. Now the scene cuts to Sister, Lizzy and the other girls who are cleaning up Mr. and Mrs. Bruin's vandalized living room. Sister still makes up for it, even though she was still grounded in the house for the remainder of the week. That is, as well as Lizzy, the other girls, and Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz. Sister, she manages to help Lizzy and the other girls clean up. That is, despite the fact she was still grounded for the remainder of the week.]'' 
:'''Queenie''': This was a good idea for us all to come over and help clean up, Sister.
:'''Lizzie''': Hey, I know! Everyone's doing such a good job, we should make this a clean up party!
:'''Sister Bear''': Let's not, Lizzy. If you don't mind, I rather not hear the word &quot;party&quot; again for a long time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[the episode first line]'' If you're a bear who loves TV, loud music, and fun, how are you going to get your homework done?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Mama after she finds garbage in Brother's brown backpack including a brown apple core and an old banana peel. And --last but not least-- a moldy piece of bread picks up a letter. It's a letter from Teacher Bob. The letter --from Teacher Bob Brother's fifth grade teacher--  reads...!]''
:'''Mama Bear''': '' Rotting lunch leftovers. Is this a backpack or composter.''
:''Papa Bear Well, at least we know he's not littering.''
:'''Mama Bear''': Hmm...! What is this? A note?
:''[Then Mama reads the letter. She starts it saying...!]'' 
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[reading]'' ''Dear parent,''
:''I regret to inform you...!''
:''[Mama pauses, passes the letter to Papa, and Papa reads it. After Papa reads it, Mama looks at Papa, and then she --Mama-- says...!]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Looks like you and I better have a talk with our son!
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[before he goes over to Brother, he finishes reading the letter]'' ''Dear parent,''
:''I regret to inform you that Brother Bear has fallen too far behind in his homework.''
:''Please call me.''
:''Yours truly,''
:''Teacher Bob''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': '''EARTH TO BROTHER! EARTH TO BROTHER! THIS IS YOUR PAPA SPEAKING!'''
:'''Brother Bear''': Uh, Freddy. I gotta go. I'll call you later. Bye. ''[hangs up the phone and looks at Papa]'' Were you saying something, Papa? I wasn't quite reading you.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[He takes the headphones off Brother]'' '''YOU'RE NOT READING MUCH OF ANYTHING, ACCORDING TO THIS LETTER FROM YOUR TEACHER!''' 
:'''Brother Bear''': I, uh!
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[calmly, but sternly]'' It says here &quot;You've fallen way behind in your [[w:homework|homework]]&quot;.
:'''Sister Bear''': Maybe Brother's too busy with other things, like girls.
:'''Brother Bear''': I am not!
:'''Mama Bear''': Sister, that's quite enough.
:'''Brother Bear''': Yes! Go and do your own homework!
:'''Sister Bear''': I'm already done!
:'''Brother Bear''': That's because your homework is easy!
:'''Sister Bear''': '''IS NOT!'''
:'''Brother Bear''': '''IS TOO!'''
:'''Mama Bear''': Stop that now, both of you. Let's figure out what the problem is.
:'''Brother Bear''': I'll tell you what the problem is: I have too much homework! There's English and math and there's science and history and... Oh...! Every subject for every day until it's coming out of my ears!
:'''Papa Bear''': Is that so? Have you been doing your homework every day?
:'''Brother Bear''': Well. ''[chuckles]'' Not really.
:'''Papa Bear''': (That does not really seem like too much homework to me! I am not hearing any sort of explanation! I guess that's because tonight's homework is not really the trouble! The trouble is that you have not been turning in your homework on a daily basis! You have not been taking care of business! You are falling behind!) If you do a little bit of homework every day, it wouldn't pile up to a [[w:mountain|mountain]] of work! And that is what you have here! (Be done with your homework too fast and you may still fall behind! That is, even if you get a 4.0 GPA on your report card on all 3 quarters --fall, winter and spring! I mean, &quot;Be done with your homework too fast and you might still fall behind, even if you get a 4.0 GPA on your report card and next tests&quot;!) 
:'''Mama Bear''': I'm afraid Papa's right! So there are going to have to be some changes around here! 
:'''Brother Bear''': Like what?
:'''Papa Bear''': Like no more [[w:music|music]], no more [[w:TV|TV]], no more talking on the [[w:phone|phone]]...!
:'''Sister Bear''': What about [[w: video game|video games]], Papa?
:'''Papa Bear''': And no more video games until you get caught up with your homework! 
:'''Brother Bear''': But you don't understand! That will take forever!
:'''Papa Bear''': Then you better get started! (And no more getting done with your homework too fast! That is, or you are still put behind! You are behind, even if you get an &quot;A&quot; on your next report card! An &quot;A&quot; still gets you a &quot;C&quot; or &quot;D&quot;!) 
:''[According to Papa's saying, Brother only has an &quot;A&quot; in fifth grade because he is passing his math, science, history, language arts and art tests. That is, without cheating. But according to Teacher Bob, in the spite of that, even if he --Brother-- gets a 4.0 GPA on his next report card, it still puts him behind. And he --for every subject except physical education-- still gets a &quot;C&quot; or &quot;D&quot; in fifth grade. That is, and if that keeps up --and if he doesn't pick up his grades to at least a &quot;B&quot;-- he might have to be held back in fifth grade and/or take summer school.) 
:'''Brother Bear''': Oh...
:'''Papa Bear''': Where are you going?
:'''Brother Bear''': I'm just going outside to see the sunlight and smell the fresh air one last time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot; /&gt;
:'''Gramps''': Well, you might ask Teacher Bob to give you a catch-up period. I think he should go along with that. He's a pretty good guy.
:'''Brother Bear''': That's a good idea! But the first thing I have to do is go home and get some of it done today.
:'''Gramps''': That's the spirit!
:'''Brother Bear''': If Papa can do it, then so can I.

===''The Talent Show / The Haunted Lighthouse'' [1.9]===
:'''Teacher Bob''': I believe that everyone has a special talent, but sometimes it can take a little help to find out what it is.

&lt;hr&gt;
:'''Fuzzy''': ''[imitating a groundhog]'' Well?
:'''Brother Bear''': A [[w:pig|pig]]?
:'''Fuzzy''': [[w:groundhog|Groundhog]].
:'''Brother Bear''': Oh, yeah, groundhog, right.
:'''Fuzzy''': Wait, wait, wait! How about this? ''[imitates a pig]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Uh, groundhog?
:'''Fuzzy''': Pig!
:'''Brother Bear''': Ah, great,  Fuzzy. What other animal impressions can you do?
:'''Fuzzy''': ''[gasps]'' That's it.
:'''Brother Bear''': How about a [[w:cattle|cow]], or maybe a [[w:horse|horse]], or...
:'''Fuzzy''': Nope, just groundhog and pig. [[w:pickle|Pickle]]?
:'''Brother Bear''': Uh, no thanks. I'll get back to you, Fuzzy.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[to Too-Tall]'' You want to be in the talent show?
:'''Cousin Fred''': Does having the hairiest knuckles count as a talent?
:'''Too-Tall''': Very funny.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Hey! there's something outside!
:'''Papa Bear''': Huh?
:'''Mama Bear''': Huh?
:''[They all look outside the window]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Really, something was there! I saw it! It was glowing.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[laughs]'' My guess would be it was your glowing imagination.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': This looks like a job for...
:'''Brother Bear and Sister Bear''': The Bear Detectives.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Captain Salt'''ː I am the ghost of the lighthouse keeper! I am... Uh-oh.

===''The Birthday Boy / The Green-Eyed Monster'' [1.10]===
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[Little Lady licks Papa's video camera while Sister is using to do a movie about Brother for her school project]'' Little Lady, no! Hey! No! Stop!

:'''Lizzie''': Maybe you can make a movie about Brother.
:'''Sister Bear''': What's so special about him? He's just a brother.

&lt;hr width=“50%”/&gt;
:'''Cindy''': My [[w:dog|dog]]'s a special member in my family. Do dogs count?
:'''Lizzy''': I once saw a [[w:horse|horse]] at the circus that could count.
:'''Teacher Jane''': No dogs or horses.
:'''Cindy''': What about [[w:cat|cats]]?
:'''Teacher Jane''': No dogs, cats, horses [[w:turtle|turtles]], [[w:frog|frogs]] or [[w:fish|fish]]. Only mamas papas sisters brothers or other bears in your family.

&lt;hr width=“50%”/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Mama, I have to do a project for school about a member of my family. I was thinking about making a movie about you or Papa.
:'''Papa Bear''': A movie, huh? That sounds like fun. But we are sort of busy.
:'''Mama Bear''': There's a lot to do before Brother's party tomorrow. Why don't you make your movie about him?
:'''Sister Bear''': Brother?
:'''Brother Bear''': Did somebody call me?
:'''Papa Bear''': Hey, no peeking!
:'''Brother Bear''': Aw! I'm going to Cousin Fred's! See you later!
:'''Mama Bear''': No skateboarding in the house! And be home for dinner!
:'''Brother Bear''': Okay!
:'''Sister Bear''': There's nothing special about him. He's just my brother.
:'''Mama Bear ''': You might be surprised.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[The next day is Brother's birthday. After singing happy birthday, Brother is opening his gifts.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Wow! A new [[w:basketball|basketball]]! Thanks! Nice wrapping job, Papa.
:''' Sister Bear''': Happy Birthday, Brother!
:'''Brother Bear''': I bet I know what this is! My very favorite movie of all time! Bear Force 1!
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' Nope.
:'''Brother Bear''': Grizzly Justice?
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[nods her head no as it's neither of those.]'' It's called My hero The birthday boy.
:'''Mama Bear''': Why don't we watch it?
:'''Brother Bear''': Uh.. ''[chuckles nervously]'' Gee. I really don't know if...
:'''Everyone''': Show it! Show it! Show it!
:''[The scene cuts to Brother, Sister, Mama, Papa, Lizzy, Cousin Freddy and Fuzzy watching the video tape Sister created]''
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[on the TV]'' He's the best Brother anyone could have in the whole wide world. He's my hero.
:''[Everyone claps for Sister]''
:'''Brother Bear''': That was great, Sister. Thanks. ''[kisses Sister]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Showing someone how you feel about them can be the greatest gift of all.
:'''Papa Bear''': And you don't even have to wrap it.
:''[Sister takes the video tape out of the DVD player]''
:'''Brother Bear''': You're taking back my present?
:'''Sister Bear''': Just for a little bit. I have to take it to class to show Teacher Jane.
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, I don't know what grade you'll get from her, but from me you get an A+.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': Your car is running, Mr. Bruin.
:'''Mr. Bruin''': Yes, I guess I should be happy it's running at all.
:'''Mama Bear''': No, Mr. Bruin, he means it's running away!
:'''Mr Bruin''': What? ''[realizes his car is rolling down hill]'' Oh no! Not again! Gotta go! I'll pick you up later, Lizzie!
:'''Lizzie''': Okay, bye, Papa! ''[to Sister]'' Maybe after Brother is finished riding his [[w: bicycle|bike]], you can borrow it, and I can ride your bike.
:'''Sister Bear''': Probably not. Brother doesn't let anyone ride his bike. Not even me!
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[imitating a car while riding his bike around the front yard but is about to fall off because it's outgrown. Luckily Papa catches Brother]'' '''WHOA!'''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Is the green-eyed monster still knocking, Papa?
:'''Papa Bear''': Yes, but I'm not going to let him in.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Green-Eyed Monster''': ''[to Sister]'' Don't you think it's not fair that Brother gets the pretty bike and you get an old bike?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': I did it! ''[riding on Brother's bicycle]'' I knew this bike wasn't too big for... ''[realizes that she can't reach the pedals because the bike is too big]'' Uh-oh!

===''The Baby Chipmunk / The Wishing Star'' [1.11]===
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[to Brother about the chipmunk she found]'' It looks like a little [[w:mouse|mouse]].
:'''Brother Bear''': That's not a mouse, that's a [[w:chipmunk|chipmunk]].
:'''Papa Bear''': You're right, Brother. And a baby one too. It looks brand new.
:'''Mama Bear''': His eyes are barely open.
:'''Sister Bear''': A little baby! Aw! It's so cute!
:'''Brother Bear''': And so teeny.
:''[Sister tries to pet the chipmunk, but Papa stops her]''
:'''Papa Bear''': No, Sister. You shouldn't touch him.
:'''Sister Bear''': But I want to take him into the house!
:'''Papa Bear''': Chipmunks belong outdoors, not in the house.
:'''Sister Bear''': But it's just a baby, Papa.
:'''Papa Bear''': All the more reason to leave him outside. He belongs with his mama. We better move away so she can find her baby.
:'''Sister Bear''' ''[sadly]'' Okay. ''[to the chipmunk]'' Bye-bye, baby chipmunk.
:'''Brother Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' Come on, Sister!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': It's going to be dark soon.
:'''Sister Bear''': So can we take the chipmunk inside then?
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[sternly]'' Now, Sister, remember what I said? Chipmunks belong outside.
:'''Sister Bear''': I know, but he's just a little baby.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[looks at the stormy clouds]'' Well, it does look like [[w:rain|rain]]. Okay, but only because it's going to rain.
:'''Sister Bear''': Yay! ''[hugs Papa]''
:'''Papa Bear''': And only for tonight.
:'''Mama Bear''': We'll keep an eye out for his mama.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Mama, what do baby chipmunks eat?
:'''Mama Bear''': Like most babies, they milk from their mamas. But since we don't have a mama chipmunk, we're going to have to improvise. Sister, you run upstairs to get one of your doll's baby bottles, ''[to Brother]'' And Brother, you find something for the chipmunk to sleep in. I'll fix him something to eat.
:''[Mama goes in the kitchen to make something for the chipmunk]''
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[to the chipmunk]'' How does a little warm [[w:milk|milk]] and [[w:honey|honey]] sound?
:'''Papa Bear''': Delicious! But I thought we were having [[w:maple|mapled]] cured [[w:salmon|salmon]] tonight.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[laughs]'' It's for the chipmunk, silly.
:'''Papa Bear''': Well, in that case, milk and honey sounds fine.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': All Brown Eyes does is eat and sleep.
:'''Mama Bear''': Well, that's what babies do. When they aren't eating and sleeping, ...
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[giggles]'' They're sleeping and eating.
:'''Mama Bear''': Exactly.
:'''Sister Bear''': Babies and papas.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' Hey! I heard that!
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[giggles]'' I love you, Brown Eyes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mama Bear''': They say the first star you see at night you can make a wish on. That's why it's called the wishing star.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': It's really amazing how hard work and determination can magically give you what you deserve.

===''Get the Gimmies / Lost In A Cave'' [1.12]===

:'''Mama Bear''': When a cub's behavior takes a turn for the worst, it's hard for parents to know what to do first.
:'''Sister Bear''': Did you bring the shopping list, Papa?
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[grabs the shopping list out]'' I got it right here. It's a long one today.
:'''Sister Bear''': I hope the new [[w:peanut butter|peanut butter]] and [[w:jelly|jelly]] all-in one jar is on the list!
:'''Brother Bear''': And the new purple catsup!
:'''Papa Bear''': Purple catsup? Who ever heard of purple catsup?
:'''Mama Bear''': If it's new, the cubs have heard of it.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[sighs]'' And want to buy it.
:''[When they get in the store]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Now, remember what I told you in the car. We're here to buy groceries, that's all, so no asking for toys and treats. Is that understood? ''[realizes the cubs have wondered off]'' Huh?
:'''Papa Bear''': Uh-oh, it looks like we're off to a bad start.
:''[The cubs look at the vending machines filled with rainbow gob-busters, spy bear decoder rings and bearbie stickers.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Wow! Rainbow gob-busters!
:'''Sister Bear''': Cool!
:'''Brother Bear''': Check this out, Sister! They have spy bear decoder rings!
:'''Sister Bear''': And bearbie stickers!
:''[Mama clears throat]''
:'''Brother Bear''': I want one of those [[w:ring|rings]], Mama.
:'''Sister Bear''': I want some [[w:sticker|stickers]].
:'''Mama Bear''': What did I just tell you on the way here?
:'''Brother Bear''': Uh... Um... Well, uh...
:'''Sister Bear''': Um, I forget. 
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[sighs]'' That we're not here to buy treats. Now come along. ''[The cubs walk to Mama, and she looks at the donation displays]'' Why, isn't that nice?
:'''Papa Bear''': Mm-hmm. It's a fine idea.
:'''Brother Bear''': What's a fine idea?
:'''Mama Bear''': The store has put these donation displays here to remind everyone to give to the different charities in our community.
:'''Papa Bear''': You two might think about donating some of the toys you've outgrown to the Sick Cubs [[w: hospital|Hospital]].
:'''Brother Bear''': Hey! What's that?
:'''Sister Bear''': Oh!
:''[The cubs run to the treat place]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Look! New [[w: marshmallow|marshmallow]]-[[w: chocolate|chocolate]] bears!
:''[Brother and Sister each take one marshmallow chocolate bear off the shelf]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Can we have one? Please, please!
:'''Mama Bear''': You know the answer. Now put those back.
:'''Brother Bear''': Aw, okay. ''[puts his marshmallow chocolate bear back on the shelf]''
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[sighs]'' Alright. ''[puts her marshmallow chocolate bear back on the shelf, then she and Brother sadly walk away]''
:'''Mama Bear''': I can see that this shopping trip is going to be the same as all the others.
:'''Papa Bear''': Hmm! Marshmallow and chocolate. ''[Mama grabs his shoulder]'' Oh!
:''[The scene cuts to Mama and Papa in an aisle of jars of honey]'' 
:'''Papa Bear''': Hmm, two jars of [[w:honey|honey]]!
:'''Mama Bear''': Two? I only have one on my list.
:'''Papa Bear''': We do go through a lot of honey, honey.
:'''Mama Bear''': ''You'' go through a lot of honey, honey. I think one jar is enough.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[shows Mama a big jar of honey]'' How about this one? ''[licks his lips]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Papa!
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[chuckles]'' Okay, it's true what they say about grocery shopping. ''[puts the big honey jar back]'' You should never do it on an empty stomach.
:'''Brother Bear''': Wow! Neat! Glow-in-the-dark flyers! This would be lots of fun to play with at night! Can I get it?
:'''Mama Bear''': No! I've told you not more than ten minutes ago that...
:'''Sister Bear:''': ''[bringing a bouncy apple]'' Mama? Papa? Can I get this?
:'''Papa Bear''': An [[w:apple|apple]]? Sure!
:'''Sister Bear''': Thanks! ''[bounces the bouncy apple on the ground]''
:'''Papa Bear''': Oh, careful now! You'll bruise it!
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[bounces the bouncy apple again]'' It's not a real apple, Papa. It's bouncy fruit. Neat, huh? They've got bouncy [[w:orange fruit|oranges]], bouncy [[w:pear|pears]] and bouncy [[w:banana|bananas]].
:'''Brother Bear''': Hey, if Sister can have bouncy fruit, then, ''[holds up the glow-in-the-dark flyer]'' then I can have this!
:''[Mama takes the toys away from Brother and Sister.]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Now listen, you two. It's not your [[w:birthday|birthday]] and it's not [[w:Christmas|Christmas]] and it's not &quot;Give Your Cubs a Treat&quot; day, so you can put these toys back right now. 
:'''Cubs''': Aw!
:'''Papa Bear''': Give Your Cubs a Treat Day? When's that? 
:'''Mama Bear''': There's no such thing, but the way Brother and Sister carry on, you think it was every day of the year.
:''[The scene cuts to the checkout section, while Brother and Sister go and look at the candy aisle]''
:'''Sister Bear''': Mmm, look at all the [[w:candy|candy]]!
:'''Brother Bear''': I know. It's hard to know what to pick. Ask Mama if we can get something.
:'''Sister Bear''': You ask.
:'''Brother Bear''': No, you ask.
:'''Sister Bear''' We'll both ask.
:'''Brother Bear''' Okay.
:'''Cubs''' Mama, can we get something?
:'''Mama Bear''' Yes you can. I forgot to pick up scouring pads. Could you hurry over to aisle 3 and get a package?
:'''Cubs''': Aw!
:''[The scene cuts to outside of the store]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, that was a fun trip.
:'''Sister Bear''': I know. We spent all that time grocery shopping, and all we got were groceries.
:'''Brother Bear''': Wait a minute, look!
:'''Guy''': Aw, come on, folks, Get your adorable kitty [[w:cat|cats]] here, folks! They're cute, they're cuddly, and they won't last long!
:'''Papa Bear''': They won't last long, alright. They'll probably break in less than an hour.
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, Papa.
:'''Brother Bear''': I want one, mister!
:'''Sister Bear''': Me too!
:'''Guy''': Here you go, cubs.
:'''Brother Bear''': These are great!
:'''Sister Bear''': These are cool!
:'''Papa Bear''': Now, just hold on! We didn't come here to buy toys.
:'''Mama Bear''': Papa's right. Remember what I told you about buying toys and treats? 
:'''Brother Bear''': But that was when we were getting our groceries. We're finished now.
:'''Sister Bear''': And look at how cute they are! Please, please, please! Can we get them?
:'''Guy''': Oh, come on, folks. Why don't you buy your cubs a treat?
:'''Sister Bear''': Oh, Papa, I'd appreciate it ever, ever so much!
:'''Woman''': Oh, my, she is such an adorable little cub!
:'''Man''': How could you say no to a face like that?
:'''Papa Bear''': But... I... '''OH! ALL RIGHT!''' ''[grumbles while giving the guy money]''
:'''Guy''': Thank you very much, sir, and have a great day. 
:'''Papa Bear''': You’re welcome.
:'''Brother Bear''': Thanks, Papa!
:'''Sister Bear''': Thank you, Papa!
:''[Go back home.]''
:'''Papa Bear''': Of all the shameful, embarrassing, outrageous behavior, that was the worst case of the galloping gimmies I have ever seen!
:'''Mama Bear''': You're right, Papa, but perhaps it's partly our fault for giving in.
:'''Papa Bear''': Well, what more could we do with all those strangers staring at us? I think it's time we had a talk with our cubs. ''[The cubs walk upstairs. But Papa calls for them; offscreen]'' Brother! Sister!
:'''Cubs''': Yes, Papa?
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[offscreen]'' Into the living room, please. It's time for a family meeting. 
:''[The scene cuts to the cubs in the living room, seeing Papa for a family meeting.]'' 
:'''Papa Bear''': There are more important things in this world than getting as many treats that you can get your hands on. Greedy cubs who only think of themselves can never really be happy. Do you know why?
:'''Cubs''': No.
:'''Papa Bear''': Because you can't have everything you want in life all the time. Do you understand?
:'''Cubs''': Yes.
:'''Mama Bear''': And furthermore, sometimes it's good to think of others instead of just yourselves. 
:'''Sister Bear''': Okay.
:'''Brother Bear''': We will.
:'''Papa Bear''': Good!
:''[Gran and Gramps arrive to visit]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, Gran and Gramps are here!
:'''[The cubs gasp in excitement, and they run towards the door to ask Gramps and Gran if they brought them anything]''
:'''Gramps''': Hi, there!
:'''Brother Bear''': What did you bring us?
:'''Sister Bear''': Yeah, what did you bring us?
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[scolds the cubs]'' '''I can't believe you two! You didn't even say hello! &quot;THAT'S IT! UP TO YOUR ROOM!''' ''[Brother and Sister sadly head upstairs to their room]'' '''AND THERE WILL BE NO TREATS FOR A WEEK! A MONTH! A YEAR!''' 
:'''Gramps''': You having a bad day, son?
:'''Papa Bear''': I'm sorry about the unpleasant welcome, but Sister and Brother have had a bad case of the greedy galloping gimmies. 
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, the worst case yet!
:'''Gramps''': Worst case, huh? I think I have seen worse.
:'''Papa Bear''': Well, I am not quite surprised. They've probably made quite a spectacle of themselves over at your house.
:'''Gramps''': I was talking about you, actually.
:'''Papa Bear''': Me? I had the gimmies?
:''[Brother and Sister are out of their rooms, wondering what Mama, Papa, Gran, and Gramps are talking about.]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Papa had the gimmies?
:'''Gramps''': Yep, I am afraid it's true. But you turned around, eventually.
:'''Gran''': I remember the day it happened.
:'''Gramps''': So do I. It was at old Rufe Grizzly's General Store. ''[Cut to a flashback]'' We were buying our groceries, and you got the gimmies.
:'''Gran''': You made such a fuss over a truck that it was downright embarrassing. 
:''[Cut back to reality]''
:'''Brother Bear''': Like how we fussed about those kitty cats.
:'''Sister Bear''': And embarrassed Papa.
:'''Papa Bear''': Well, I am glad that you didn't give in.
:'''Gramps''': Oh, I am afraid that we did.
:'''Papa Bear''': Oh?
:''[Cut back to the flashback]''
:'''Gramps''': You got what you wanted that day, but then as we were leaving, you noticed a family that barely had enough to put food on the counter. Seeing those folks and how little they had somehow got you to thinking.
:''[The flashback ends]''
:'''Papa Bear''': And I gave that cub my [[w:truck|truck]]! I remember that!
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, I love that story!
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[out loud]'' Me too! Oops.
:'''Brother Bear''': We're sorry about how we acted.
:'''Sister Bear''': I wish we could just start this whole day over again.
:'''Gramps''': Well, we can start part of it over again. ''[to Gran]'' Step outside, dear.
:'''Gran''': ''[chuckles]'' Alright.
:''[Gramps and Gran walk outside and close the door. Then they knock on the door]''
:'''Mama Bear''': Oh, I wonder who that could be?
:''[the cubs laugh]''
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[opens the door for Gramps and Gran]'' Well, look who's here. Gramps and Gran.
:'''Brother Bear''': Hi, Gramps and Gran!
:'''Sister Bear''': Hi, Gramps, hi Gran!
:'''Gran''': Hello, everyone.
:'''Brother Bear''': It sure is good to see you.
:'''Sister Bear''': Yes, and if you brought us something, you can just leave it in the car because we're not even thinking about it.
:''[Mama, Papa, Gramps, and Gran laugh]''
:'''Sister Bear''': What?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': You never can tell what a cave is going to be like on the inside, just like from what it looks like on the outside.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Look! Wow! Real, live fossils.
:'''Cousin Fred''': Maybe a million years ago they were alive!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': Things that seem scary really aren't, once you know what they really are.
:'''Cousin Fred''': I know. There's a logical explanation for everything.
:'''Brother Bear''': Exactly! ''[his voice echoes]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': Our string path turned into a spaghetti lunch for this goat!

===''Too Much Junk Food / Go To Camp'' [1.13]===
:'''Dr. Grizzly''': Exercise is an important part of a healthy lifestyle.
:'''Papa Bear''': ''[panting]'' I agree with you, one hundred percent.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': ''[panting]'' Gees, I don't get this tired when I play [[w:baseball|baseball]].
:'''Brother Bear''': Well, you're running much farther than second base, Sis.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Brother Bear''': What about Sugarballs?
:'''Sister Bear''': And Choco Chums?
:'''Papa Bear''': And Sweetsie [[w:cola|Cola]]?
:'''Dr. Grizzly''': Sweets and goodies don't give you the kind of nourishment your body needs.
:'''Sister Bear''': Are they bad for us?
:'''Dr. Grizzly''': Having treats occasionally is fine. If you have too much, they fill you up and you're not hungry for the healthy foods your body needs.
:'''Papa Bear''': Well cubs, it's time for us to get our [[w:train|trains]] back on the track.
:'''Sister Bear''': You're right, Papa. ''[Sister starts chugging and whistling like a train]''
:'''Papa Bear''': Whoo-whoo! ''[looking back toward Brother; chuckles]'' Get on board, son. Whoo-whoo!
:'''Brother Bear''': I... I think I'll walk. I need the exercise.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Papa Bear''': I have an idea. Let's go home, celebrate by opening up the [[w:freezer|freezer]], and...
:'''Mama Bear''': ''[cuts him off]'' Uh-uh-uh, it's far too easy to fall back into the junk food habit. 
:'''Brother Bear''': We'll celebrate with carrot sticks.
:'''Sister Bear''': And nuts and raisins.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sister Bear''': Do you think this sleep-out is a good idea?
:'''Brother Bear''': No.
:'''Sister Bear''': Oh, good.
:'''Brother Bear''': I think it's a great idea!

==External links==
{{wikipedia|The Berenstain Bears (2003 TV series)}}

[[Category:The Berenstain Bears (2003 TV series) seasons|1]]
[[Category:PBS Kids Tv Shows]]</text>
      <sha1>5nneswy87td2lc2135ttzcorsieeuv8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Peppa Pig (season 2)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>229392</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965125</id>
      <parentid>3953644</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:40:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35335-22</username>
        <id>3342717</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Captain Daddy Pig */</comment>
      <origin>3965125</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9972" sha1="h68y7f0e4aq763njasfn7ojirblt151" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Peppa Pig (season 1)|1]] [[Peppa Pig (season 2)|2]] [[Peppa Pig (season 3)|3]] [[Peppa Pig (season 4)|4]] [[Peppa Pig (season 5)|5]] [[Peppa Pig (season 6)|6]] [[Peppa Pig (season 7)|7]] [[Peppa Pig (season 8)|8]] [[Peppa Pig (season 9)|9]] | [[Peppa Pig|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Peppa Pig|Peppa Pig]]''''' (2004–present) is a British preschool animated television series directed and produced by Astley Baker Davies in association with Entertainment One, Nick Jr., Channel 5 and Hasbro's Allspark Animation.

===''Bubbles''===

===''Emily Elephant''===
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her friends are going to playgroup today. The children each have their own hook to hang their coats on.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': Today we have a new pupil. Emily Elephant.
:'''Peppa, Suzy Sheep, Danny Dog, Candy Cat, Pedro Pony, Rebecca Rabbit, and Zoe Zebra''': Hello, Emily.
:'''Emily Elephant''': Hello.
:'''Narrator''': Emily is a bit shy.
===''Polly's Holiday''===
:'''Narrator''': Granny and Grandpa Pig are going on holiday. They are bringing Polly Parrot to Peppa's house so Peppa and George can look after her.
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Hello, everyone!
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Grandpa Pig! Hello, Granny Pig!
:'''Granny Pig''': Polly is very excited about her holiday with Peppa and George.
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Polly!
:'''Polly Parrot''': Hello, Polly!
===''Teddy's Day Out''===
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are going out for the day. Daddy Pig has made a picnic.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Oink! Peppa, George, have you got your stuff ready?
:'''Peppa''': Oink! Yes, I'm taking Teddy.
:'''George''': Dinosaur!
:'''Mummy Pig''': If you take your toys you must look after them.
:'''Peppa''': Yes, Mummy.
:'''George''': Oink! Oink!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Are we all ready?
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Then let's go.
:'''George''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''DINOSAUR!!!!! WAAAAAAA-HAAAAAAA!!!!! EEEEEEEWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!!!!! EEEEEEEAAAAAAAUHWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Narrator''': George had left Mr. Dinosaur behind.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh, George, you should take more care of Mr. Dinosaur.
:'''George''': Dinosaur! 
:'''Daddy Pig''': Are we all absolutely sure we haven't forgotten anything else?
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig.
:'''Peppa''': Teddy! I've left Teddy.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Where did you leave Teddy?
:'''Peppa''': I think on the kitchen table.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Peppa, you really must take more care of Teddy.
:'''Peppa''': Teddy! Oink!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Here we go again. All ready?
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Here we go.
:'''Narrator''': This the picnic area.
:'''Daddy Pig''': We're here!
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Hurray!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Ah, I love this picnic spot. Oink! It's so quiet and peaceful.
:'''Narrator''': It is Zoe Zebra with her daddy Mr. Zebra the Postman.
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Mr. Zebra. Oink! Have you got our post?
:'''Mr. Zebra''': No deliveries today. It's my day off.
:'''Zoe Zebra''': Neigh! We're having a picnic lunch.

===''Mysteries''===
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are watching their favourite television programme, Detective Potato.
:'''Detective Potato''': I am Detective Potato, the world-famous detective.
:'''Peppa, George, Mummy Pig, and Daddy Pig''': Ooh!
:'''Mrs. Potato''': Please help me, Mr. Detective. I cannot find my flower anywhere.
:'''Detective Potato''': Hm. Your flower is on the top of your head.
:'''Mrs. Potato''': Oh, thank you, Mr. Detective.

===''Sports Day''===
:'''Madame Gazelle''': The first event is running. ''[Everyone is in the running track]''
:'''Narrator''': The children have to run as fast as they can.
:'''Peppa''': I think I will win. I can run very fast.
:'''Suzy Sheep''': I'm faster than you.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': Ready, steady, go! ''[The children run with Rebecca Rabbit who's in the lead, except Suzy and Peppa]''
:'''Peppa''': I can run at a hundred miles an hour.
:'''Suzy Sheep''': I can run at a million miles an hour.
:'''Papa Pig''': Peppa! Suzy! Stop talking and RUN!
:'''Peppa''': Oh! ''[They began racing along with the other kids]''
:'''Narrator''': Rebecca Rabbit is in the lead. Oh dear! Peppa and Suzy are right at the back. ''[Everybody shouts when Rebecca crossed the finish line]''
:'''Narrator''': Rebecca Rabbit wins. ''[pan to Suzy and Peppa]'' And Peppa and Suzy are last.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': ''[at the winner]'' The winner of the race is Rebecca Rabbit!
:'''Children''': Hooray!
:'''Rebecca Rabbit''': (blushes) Thank you.
:'''Peppa''': ''[back at both]''I would have won if you hadn't been talking to me, Suzy.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Now, now, Peppa. Remember, it's not winning that matters, but taking part.
:'''Peppa''': Yes, Daddy.

===''Zoe Zebra the Postman's Daughter''===
:'''Zoe Zebra''': Is it for me? Can I open it now?

===''Painting''===
:'''Daddy Pig''': There. The painting is finished.
:'''Peppa''': Hooray!
:'''George''': Oink-oink.
:'''All 3 Ducks''': Quack-quack, quack-quack!
:'''Peppa''': Oh, it's the ducks. Oink. Hello, Mrs. Duck. We're painting a picture.

===''The Long Grass''===
:'''Narrator''': The Long Grass! (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and George are playing in the garden.
:'''Peppa''': (Peppa giggles) Oh!
:'''Narrator''': The grass has not been cut for a while. It is grown very long.
:'''George''': Papa Ig! (2x)

===''Ice Skating''===
:'''Narrator''': Ice Skating (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are going ice skating today.
:'''Peppa''': ''oink'' This will be fun!

===''Granny and Grandpa's Attic''===
:'''Narrator''': Granny and Grandpa's Attic (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and George are playing at Granny and Grandpa's house today.
:'''Peppa''': *oink* Hello, Grandpa Pig.
:'''George''': Papa Ig!
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Ho-ho! Hello, Peppa. Hello, George.
:'''Peppa and George''': [giggles]
:'''Mummy Pig''': *oink* Bye-bye, see you later.
:'''Peppa''': See you later. Where's Granny Pig?
:'''Granny Pig''': Hello, my little ones!
:'''Narrator''': That's Granny Pig's voice, but where is she?
:'''Peppa''': Granny Pig?
:'''Granny Pig''': Here I am!
:'''Peppa''': Granny Pig!
:'''George''': Gangy Ig!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Oho! We haven't heard it for years.
:[''upbeat rock and roll'']
:[''silly sound effects'']
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Not Birdy Birdy Woof Woof, you were ALWAYS playing that!
:'''Granny Pig''': I thought we thrown that out ages ago.

===''The Quarrel''===
:'''Narrator''': The Quarrel (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and Suzy are playing ''Snap''.
:'''Suzy''': Snap! I win!
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and Suzy are best friends. 
:'''Suzy''': Snap! I win again! [laughs]
:'''Peppa''': [grunts] You cheat it!
:'''Suzy''': I did not!
:'''Peppa''': You looked at the card!
:'''Suzy''': I did not!
:'''Peppa''': [grunts] I don't want to play with you anymore. [grunts loudly]
:'''Suzy''': I don't want to play with you anymore. [blows raspberry]
:'''Narrator''': Oh dear! Peppa and Suzy have had a little quarrel.
:[''doorbell ringing'']
:'''Narrator''': Mummy Sheep is here to take Suzy home.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Peppa, say bye-bye to Suzy.
:'''Peppa''': I am not talking to her
:'''Suzy''': And I'm not talking to her.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh. [laughs] I'm sure they'll make up. They are best friends really.
:'''Peppa''': It is not funny.
:'''Suzy''': We are not best friends anymore.
:'''Narrator''': Daddy Pig is making supper.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Peppa! George! Supper time! It's spaghetti!
:'''George''': [grunts, chuckles]
:[slurping and munching]
:'''Peppa''': [sighs]
:'''Daddy Pig''': What's the matter, Peppa?
:'''Mummy Pig''': Peppa and Suzy have had a little quarrel.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Oh.
:'''Peppa''': ''oink'' But I do miss Suzy a bit.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Hmmm. Let's give Suzy a call.
:[phone dialing]
:[phone ringing]
:'''Mummy Sheep''': Meeeh! Hello, Mrs Pig.
:'''Mummy Pig''': May Peppa talk to Suzy, please?
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Suzy.
:'''Suzy''': Hello, Peppa. We can best friends again, if we you say sorry.
:'''Peppa''': I'm sorry, I said you cheated, even though you did cheat!
:'''Suzy''': Well, I'm sorry you were ever my best friend!
:[phone hang up]
:[dial tone]
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh.
:'''Peppa''': It doesn't matter. I can easily find a new best friend.
:'''Narrator''': It is a lovely sunny day. All of the children are at the playground. Danny Dog is on the roundabout with his best friend, Pedro Pony.
:'''Danny and Pedro''': Wheeee!
:'''Narrator''': George is on the seesaw with his best friend, Richard Rabbit.
:'''Richard''': See-saw!
:'''George''': See-saw!
:'''Richard and George''': [laughs]
:'''Narrator''': Suzy Sheep is on the swings, on her own. Peppa is playing mini golf, on her own. Here is Emily Elephant.
:'''Emily''': Can I have a go?
:'''Peppa''': Yes, Emily, Suzy Sheep is not my best friend anymore. So you can be my best friend.
:'''Emily''': But my best friend is Candy Cat.
:'''Candy and Emily''': [laughs]
:'''Zoe''': Wheeee!
:'''Suzy''': Zoe, if you want, you can be my best friend.
:'''Zoe''': But my best friend is Rebecca Rabbit.
:'''Rebecca''': Wheeee!
:'''Richard and Zoe''': [laughs]

===''Captain Daddy Pig''===
:'''Daddy Pig''': What a tiny little kitchen.
:'''Peppa''': *oink* Where's the picnic?
:'''Daddy Pig''': The obvious place would be here. ''[The objects from the cabinet topple on him]''
:'''Daddy Pig''': Ooh! Oof!
:'''Peppa''': (Peppa giggles) That's not a picnic!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Then, it must be here.

===''Cold Winter Day''===
:'''Peppa''': You look funny, George. (Peppa giggles)
:'''Narrator''': George does not think it is funny.
:'''George''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''WAAAAAA-HAAAAAAA!!!!! EEEEEEEWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!!!!! UHUHUHUHUHUH...!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Daddy Pig''': It's quite easy to slip on the hill.
:'''Peppa''': Daddy is like a big toboggan!

{{wikipedia|Peppa Pig}}
[[Category:Peppa Pig seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>h68y7f0e4aq763njasfn7ojirblt151</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965127</id>
      <parentid>3965125</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:42:01Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35335-22</username>
        <id>3342717</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Bubbles */</comment>
      <origin>3965127</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10033" sha1="c79249bxd2cddc8yu6qob3vr0qn08gb" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Peppa Pig (season 1)|1]] [[Peppa Pig (season 2)|2]] [[Peppa Pig (season 3)|3]] [[Peppa Pig (season 4)|4]] [[Peppa Pig (season 5)|5]] [[Peppa Pig (season 6)|6]] [[Peppa Pig (season 7)|7]] [[Peppa Pig (season 8)|8]] [[Peppa Pig (season 9)|9]] | [[Peppa Pig|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Peppa Pig|Peppa Pig]]''''' (2004–present) is a British preschool animated television series directed and produced by Astley Baker Davies in association with Entertainment One, Nick Jr., Channel 5 and Hasbro's Allspark Animation.

===''Bubbles''===
:'''Narrator:''' Oh dear! The bubble mixture is all used up!

===''Emily Elephant''===
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her friends are going to playgroup today. The children each have their own hook to hang their coats on.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': Today we have a new pupil. Emily Elephant.
:'''Peppa, Suzy Sheep, Danny Dog, Candy Cat, Pedro Pony, Rebecca Rabbit, and Zoe Zebra''': Hello, Emily.
:'''Emily Elephant''': Hello.
:'''Narrator''': Emily is a bit shy.
===''Polly's Holiday''===
:'''Narrator''': Granny and Grandpa Pig are going on holiday. They are bringing Polly Parrot to Peppa's house so Peppa and George can look after her.
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Hello, everyone!
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Grandpa Pig! Hello, Granny Pig!
:'''Granny Pig''': Polly is very excited about her holiday with Peppa and George.
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Polly!
:'''Polly Parrot''': Hello, Polly!
===''Teddy's Day Out''===
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are going out for the day. Daddy Pig has made a picnic.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Oink! Peppa, George, have you got your stuff ready?
:'''Peppa''': Oink! Yes, I'm taking Teddy.
:'''George''': Dinosaur!
:'''Mummy Pig''': If you take your toys you must look after them.
:'''Peppa''': Yes, Mummy.
:'''George''': Oink! Oink!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Are we all ready?
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Then let's go.
:'''George''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''DINOSAUR!!!!! WAAAAAAA-HAAAAAAA!!!!! EEEEEEEWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!!!!! EEEEEEEAAAAAAAUHWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Narrator''': George had left Mr. Dinosaur behind.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh, George, you should take more care of Mr. Dinosaur.
:'''George''': Dinosaur! 
:'''Daddy Pig''': Are we all absolutely sure we haven't forgotten anything else?
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig.
:'''Peppa''': Teddy! I've left Teddy.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Where did you leave Teddy?
:'''Peppa''': I think on the kitchen table.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Peppa, you really must take more care of Teddy.
:'''Peppa''': Teddy! Oink!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Here we go again. All ready?
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Here we go.
:'''Narrator''': This the picnic area.
:'''Daddy Pig''': We're here!
:'''Peppa, George, and Mummy Pig''': Hurray!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Ah, I love this picnic spot. Oink! It's so quiet and peaceful.
:'''Narrator''': It is Zoe Zebra with her daddy Mr. Zebra the Postman.
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Mr. Zebra. Oink! Have you got our post?
:'''Mr. Zebra''': No deliveries today. It's my day off.
:'''Zoe Zebra''': Neigh! We're having a picnic lunch.

===''Mysteries''===
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are watching their favourite television programme, Detective Potato.
:'''Detective Potato''': I am Detective Potato, the world-famous detective.
:'''Peppa, George, Mummy Pig, and Daddy Pig''': Ooh!
:'''Mrs. Potato''': Please help me, Mr. Detective. I cannot find my flower anywhere.
:'''Detective Potato''': Hm. Your flower is on the top of your head.
:'''Mrs. Potato''': Oh, thank you, Mr. Detective.

===''Sports Day''===
:'''Madame Gazelle''': The first event is running. ''[Everyone is in the running track]''
:'''Narrator''': The children have to run as fast as they can.
:'''Peppa''': I think I will win. I can run very fast.
:'''Suzy Sheep''': I'm faster than you.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': Ready, steady, go! ''[The children run with Rebecca Rabbit who's in the lead, except Suzy and Peppa]''
:'''Peppa''': I can run at a hundred miles an hour.
:'''Suzy Sheep''': I can run at a million miles an hour.
:'''Papa Pig''': Peppa! Suzy! Stop talking and RUN!
:'''Peppa''': Oh! ''[They began racing along with the other kids]''
:'''Narrator''': Rebecca Rabbit is in the lead. Oh dear! Peppa and Suzy are right at the back. ''[Everybody shouts when Rebecca crossed the finish line]''
:'''Narrator''': Rebecca Rabbit wins. ''[pan to Suzy and Peppa]'' And Peppa and Suzy are last.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': ''[at the winner]'' The winner of the race is Rebecca Rabbit!
:'''Children''': Hooray!
:'''Rebecca Rabbit''': (blushes) Thank you.
:'''Peppa''': ''[back at both]''I would have won if you hadn't been talking to me, Suzy.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Now, now, Peppa. Remember, it's not winning that matters, but taking part.
:'''Peppa''': Yes, Daddy.

===''Zoe Zebra the Postman's Daughter''===
:'''Zoe Zebra''': Is it for me? Can I open it now?

===''Painting''===
:'''Daddy Pig''': There. The painting is finished.
:'''Peppa''': Hooray!
:'''George''': Oink-oink.
:'''All 3 Ducks''': Quack-quack, quack-quack!
:'''Peppa''': Oh, it's the ducks. Oink. Hello, Mrs. Duck. We're painting a picture.

===''The Long Grass''===
:'''Narrator''': The Long Grass! (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and George are playing in the garden.
:'''Peppa''': (Peppa giggles) Oh!
:'''Narrator''': The grass has not been cut for a while. It is grown very long.
:'''George''': Papa Ig! (2x)

===''Ice Skating''===
:'''Narrator''': Ice Skating (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are going ice skating today.
:'''Peppa''': ''oink'' This will be fun!

===''Granny and Grandpa's Attic''===
:'''Narrator''': Granny and Grandpa's Attic (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and George are playing at Granny and Grandpa's house today.
:'''Peppa''': *oink* Hello, Grandpa Pig.
:'''George''': Papa Ig!
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Ho-ho! Hello, Peppa. Hello, George.
:'''Peppa and George''': [giggles]
:'''Mummy Pig''': *oink* Bye-bye, see you later.
:'''Peppa''': See you later. Where's Granny Pig?
:'''Granny Pig''': Hello, my little ones!
:'''Narrator''': That's Granny Pig's voice, but where is she?
:'''Peppa''': Granny Pig?
:'''Granny Pig''': Here I am!
:'''Peppa''': Granny Pig!
:'''George''': Gangy Ig!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Oho! We haven't heard it for years.
:[''upbeat rock and roll'']
:[''silly sound effects'']
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Not Birdy Birdy Woof Woof, you were ALWAYS playing that!
:'''Granny Pig''': I thought we thrown that out ages ago.

===''The Quarrel''===
:'''Narrator''': The Quarrel (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and Suzy are playing ''Snap''.
:'''Suzy''': Snap! I win!
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and Suzy are best friends. 
:'''Suzy''': Snap! I win again! [laughs]
:'''Peppa''': [grunts] You cheat it!
:'''Suzy''': I did not!
:'''Peppa''': You looked at the card!
:'''Suzy''': I did not!
:'''Peppa''': [grunts] I don't want to play with you anymore. [grunts loudly]
:'''Suzy''': I don't want to play with you anymore. [blows raspberry]
:'''Narrator''': Oh dear! Peppa and Suzy have had a little quarrel.
:[''doorbell ringing'']
:'''Narrator''': Mummy Sheep is here to take Suzy home.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Peppa, say bye-bye to Suzy.
:'''Peppa''': I am not talking to her
:'''Suzy''': And I'm not talking to her.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh. [laughs] I'm sure they'll make up. They are best friends really.
:'''Peppa''': It is not funny.
:'''Suzy''': We are not best friends anymore.
:'''Narrator''': Daddy Pig is making supper.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Peppa! George! Supper time! It's spaghetti!
:'''George''': [grunts, chuckles]
:[slurping and munching]
:'''Peppa''': [sighs]
:'''Daddy Pig''': What's the matter, Peppa?
:'''Mummy Pig''': Peppa and Suzy have had a little quarrel.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Oh.
:'''Peppa''': ''oink'' But I do miss Suzy a bit.
:'''Mummy Pig''': Hmmm. Let's give Suzy a call.
:[phone dialing]
:[phone ringing]
:'''Mummy Sheep''': Meeeh! Hello, Mrs Pig.
:'''Mummy Pig''': May Peppa talk to Suzy, please?
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Suzy.
:'''Suzy''': Hello, Peppa. We can best friends again, if we you say sorry.
:'''Peppa''': I'm sorry, I said you cheated, even though you did cheat!
:'''Suzy''': Well, I'm sorry you were ever my best friend!
:[phone hang up]
:[dial tone]
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh.
:'''Peppa''': It doesn't matter. I can easily find a new best friend.
:'''Narrator''': It is a lovely sunny day. All of the children are at the playground. Danny Dog is on the roundabout with his best friend, Pedro Pony.
:'''Danny and Pedro''': Wheeee!
:'''Narrator''': George is on the seesaw with his best friend, Richard Rabbit.
:'''Richard''': See-saw!
:'''George''': See-saw!
:'''Richard and George''': [laughs]
:'''Narrator''': Suzy Sheep is on the swings, on her own. Peppa is playing mini golf, on her own. Here is Emily Elephant.
:'''Emily''': Can I have a go?
:'''Peppa''': Yes, Emily, Suzy Sheep is not my best friend anymore. So you can be my best friend.
:'''Emily''': But my best friend is Candy Cat.
:'''Candy and Emily''': [laughs]
:'''Zoe''': Wheeee!
:'''Suzy''': Zoe, if you want, you can be my best friend.
:'''Zoe''': But my best friend is Rebecca Rabbit.
:'''Rebecca''': Wheeee!
:'''Richard and Zoe''': [laughs]

===''Captain Daddy Pig''===
:'''Daddy Pig''': What a tiny little kitchen.
:'''Peppa''': *oink* Where's the picnic?
:'''Daddy Pig''': The obvious place would be here. ''[The objects from the cabinet topple on him]''
:'''Daddy Pig''': Ooh! Oof!
:'''Peppa''': (Peppa giggles) That's not a picnic!
:'''Daddy Pig''': Then, it must be here.

===''Cold Winter Day''===
:'''Peppa''': You look funny, George. (Peppa giggles)
:'''Narrator''': George does not think it is funny.
:'''George''': &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''WAAAAAA-HAAAAAAA!!!!! EEEEEEEWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!!!!! UHUHUHUHUHUH...!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Daddy Pig''': It's quite easy to slip on the hill.
:'''Peppa''': Daddy is like a big toboggan!

{{wikipedia|Peppa Pig}}
[[Category:Peppa Pig seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>c79249bxd2cddc8yu6qob3vr0qn08gb</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Peppa Pig (season 4)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>229394</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965128</id>
      <parentid>3928065</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:43:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35335-22</username>
        <id>3342717</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* The End of the Holiday */</comment>
      <origin>3965128</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1918" sha1="8vbumj5ivrstxlef5viw8ovivrev3md" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Peppa Pig (season 1)|1]] [[Peppa Pig (season 2)|2]] [[Peppa Pig (season 3)|3]] [[Peppa Pig (season 4)|4]] [[Peppa Pig (season 5)|5]] [[Peppa Pig (season 6)|6]] [[Peppa Pig (season 7)|7]] [[Peppa Pig (season 8)|8]] [[Peppa Pig (season 9)|9]] | [[Peppa Pig|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Peppa Pig|Peppa Pig]]''''' (2004–present) is a British preschool animated television series directed and produced by Astley Baker Davies in association with Entertainment One, Nick Jr., Channel 5 and Hasbro's Allspark Animation.

===''Peppa and George's Garden''===
:'''Peppa''': Daddy! You have to be the scarecrow!
:'''Daddy Pig''': What? Oh, shoo! Shoo! Naughty birds.
:'''Peppa''': Now, stay there until the birdies go to bed.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Okay, Peppa.
:'''Narrator''': All the birdies have gone to bed. Daddy Pig can go inside now. ''[rooster crowing]'' It is morning.
:'''Peppa''': George! Let's look at our flower garden!

===''Horsey Twinkle Toes''===
:'''Daddy Pig''': It's a bit steep here. Maybe you should play at the bottom of the hill, and the quickest way down the hill is to ride down ''[gets on the toy horse and snorts]''
:'''Peppa Pug''': Are you sure, Daddy? Don't crash like you always do.
:'''Daddy Pig''': I know what I'm doing, Peppa. I'm a grownup. Yeehaw! ''[rides down the hill very fast]''
:'''Peppa Pig''': How are you going to stop, Daddy?
:'''Daddy Pig''': Uh, I don't know. Where are the brakes? ''[falls in the duck pond]''

===''The End of the Holiday''===
:'''Daddy Pig''': Is everybody ready?
:'''Peppa, George and Mummy Pig''': Yes, Daddy Pig.
:'''Daddy Pig''': Then let's go home!
:'''Peppa, George, Mummy Pig and Daddy Pig''': Bye-bye!
:'''Signor Goat and Gabriella Goat''': Ciao!
:'''Gabriella Goat''': Oh, look! ''[camera closes in on Teddy]''
:'''Narrator''': Oh, dear. Peppa has forgotten Teddy.

{{wikipedia|Peppa Pig}}
[[Category:Peppa Pig seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>8vbumj5ivrstxlef5viw8ovivrev3md</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Peppa Pig (season 5)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>229395</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965130</id>
      <parentid>3947364</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:45:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-35335-22</username>
        <id>3342717</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Long Train Journey */</comment>
      <origin>3965130</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3594" sha1="k9ep4cdkjqw5m6kzuj3dtjbdircc0zi" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Peppa Pig (season 1)|1]] [[Peppa Pig (season 2)|2]] [[Peppa Pig (season 3)|3]] [[Peppa Pig (season 4)|4]] [[Peppa Pig (season 5)|5]] [[Peppa Pig (season 6)|6]] [[Peppa Pig (season 7)|7]] [[Peppa Pig (season 8)|8]] [[Peppa Pig (season 9)|9]] | [[Peppa Pig|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Peppa Pig|Peppa Pig]]''''' (2004–present) is a British preschool animated television series directed and produced by Astley Baker Davies in association with Entertainment One, Nick Jr., Channel 5 and Hasbro's Allspark Animation.

===''Gerald Giraffe''===
:'''Narrator''': It is time for playgroup.
:'''Madame Gazelle''': Children, today a new friend is joining our playgroup. Say hello to Gerald.
:'''All the children except for Gerald''': Hello, Gerald!
:'''Gerald''': Hello.
:'''Peppa''': Wow! You're really tall, so you must be really old!
:'''Madame Gazelle''': No. Gerald is the same age as you.
:'''Danny''': Why is he so tall then?
:'''Gerald''': I'm tall because I'm a giraffe.

===''The Castle''===
:'''Peppa''': The Castle! (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Today, Peppa and George are going to visit a castle. 
:'''Peppa''': What will we do at the castle, Mummy?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Daddy Rabbit''': Five, four, three, two, one! Fire!

===''Grandpa Pig's Greenhouse''===
:'''Peppa''': Grandpa Pig's Greenhouse! (title card)
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and George are visiting Granny and Grandpa Pig.
:'''Peppa''': Hello, Grandpa!
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Hello, Peppa and George!
:'''Peppa and George''': Oh!
:'''Grandpa Pig''': Let's throw this ball out of harms way.

===''Masks''===
:(''bell ringing'')
:'''Narrator''': It is home time, and the parents have come to collect their children.
:(''Glitter boom sound'')
:'''Daddy Pig''': Ah, glitter!
:'''Madame Gazelle''': Don't panic! Please remain calm. There was a glitter leak, but we have it under control now.

===''Doctors''===
:'''Pedro Pony''': My Daddy's an optician.
:(''Telephone rings)
:'''Dr Pony''': Hello, Dr Pony speaking.

===''Long Train Journey''===
:'''Mummy Pig''': And that's not all.
:'''Daddy Pig''': I wonder what this button is for? ''[Until... SPLASH! The shower washes Daddy Pig.]'' Ah!
:'''Peppa, George and Mummy Pig''': (laughing)

===''The Ambulance''===
:'''Dr. Brown Bear''': You're very welcome. And remember, always look where you're going, then... Oops! 
:'''Peppa''': Dr. Brown Bear is rolling down the hill.

===''Police Station''===
:(''Our episode opens, we begin with the Pig family's car on the motorway as Peppa announces the episode title. Daddy Pig is seen driving home with Mummy Pig, Peppa Pig and George. The title card, &quot;Police Station&quot;, appears on-screen in blue letters.)''
:'''Peppa''': (''v.o.'') Police Station. 
:'''Narrator''': Peppa and her family are driving home.
:'''Daddy Pig''': That was a great day out! Oink! Now, all I want to do is get home, put my feet up, and have a lovely cup of...
:(''Before Daddy Pig could finish, George notices Mr. Dinosaur was nowhere with him, and starts to cry. Daddy Pig stops the car to see what was the matter.'')
:'''George''': Dine-saw.....!
:'''Peppa''': (''sighs'') George has left Mr. Dinosaur, again! 
:'''Mummy Pig''': Oh dear! George could have lost Mr. Dinosaur anywhere, we've been to so many places today.
:'''Daddy Pig''': We went to the stops, to the playground, to the park...
:'''Narrator''': George cannot remember where he left Mr. Dinosaur.
:'''Peppa''': Oh well, Mr Dinosaur is lost forever, again.
:(''Offended by that comments, George cries again.'')

{{wikipedia|Peppa Pig}}
[[Category:Peppa Pig seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>k9ep4cdkjqw5m6kzuj3dtjbdircc0zi</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>229398</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965073</id>
      <parentid>3964018</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:53:06Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-34778-23</username>
        <id>3341197</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dolly Plum */</comment>
      <origin>3965073</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9462" sha1="h5pkyklcknl839la2b3dp13z969nh0w" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]]''''' (2009–2013) is a British animated children's television series aimed at children originally broadcast on Nickelodeon UK.

==Opening==
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' Somewhere, hidden amongst thorny brambles is a Little Kingdom of elves and fairies. Everyone who lives here is very, very small.
:'''Ben''': I'm Ben Elf.
:'''Holly''': I'm Princess Holly. Come on, let's play!
:'''Ben''': Wait for us!
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' [[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]].

==Season 1 (2008-2011)==
===''Holly's Magic Wand''===
:'''Holly''': I'm sure I left my wand here. It's gone! ''[Holly is crying.]''
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly.
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': What's wrong?
:'''Holly''': I've lost my wand. I can't do magic anymore.
:'''Ben''': Maybe that's a good thing.
:'''Holly''': It's not funny! I'm never going to find my wand and I'll be sad forever. ''[She cries again.]''
:'''Ben''': Cheer up, Holly. I will find your wand.
:'''Holly''': How?
:'''Ben''': Elves are very good at finding things, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:'''Holly''': Thanks, Ben.

===''Elf Joke Day''=== 
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly. I've got a new toy.
:'''Holly''': What is it?
:'''Ben''': It's a telescope. You can see things that are really far away.
:'''Holly''': Wow! Can I have a go?
:'''Ben''': ''[hands the telescope to Holly]'' Okay.
:'''Holly''': ''[holds the telescope to her eye]'' I can't see anything.
:'''Ben''': Try twisting it a bit.
:'''Holly''': ''[twists the telescope a bit]'' It still doesn't work. ''[she puts the telescope off her eye, revealing a black ring around it]''
:''[Ben starts laughing.]''
:'''Holly''': Why are you laughing, Ben?
:'''Ben''': It's a joke telescope! It gives you a black ring around your eye that makes you look really silly! Look! ''[grabs a spyglass to make Holly look at it]''
:'''Holly''': Ah! Why did you do that?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[opening the door]'' Let's go and join in the fun! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': ''[screaming while breaking the toy mouse]'' Help! 
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[entering with Ben and Holly]'' Ho-ho-ho. Happy Elf Joke Day! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': That was not funny, Wise Old Elf.

===''Morning, Noon, and Night''===
:''[rooster crows]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': That's the cockerel crow, Princess Holly! Time for fairies to get up!

===''Betty Caterpillar''===
:'''Holly''': Look, Betty Caterpillar is sad.
:''[Betty starts crying.]''
:'''Ben''': I think she feels a bit left out. ''[Gaston the Ladybird and Bobby the Bee are having fun flying. Betty is crying again.]'' I know how to cheer her up.
:'''Holly''': Oh, good. Go on then, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Don't be sad, Betty. Flying isn't everything. Elve's can't fly, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:''[Betty cries again.]''
:'''Holly''': That didn't cheer her up much. ''[Betty cries once again.]'' Maybe I can make her fly by magic.
:'''Ben''': Can you do that?
:'''Holly''': Um, I think so.

===''Picnic on the Moon''===
:'''Ben''': (''o.s.'') Today's adventure starts... In Outer Space!
:''[The scene pans up to the moon, the title Picnic on the Moon appears.]''
:'''Ben and Holly''': (''o.s.'') Picnic on the Moon!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' That's the last straw, No water in the sea and we can't eat food, What kind of picnic is this?
:'''Mr. Elf:''' ''[shouting]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''IT'S NOT A PICNIC!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' Ok, let's go home.
:'''King Thistle:''' nanny plum’s right, it’s time to go,
==Season 2 (2011-2014)==
===''Gaston to the Rescue''===
:'''King Thistle:''' Ewww, who let this smelly ladybird in the house?!

:'''Queen Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]''
:'''King Thistle''': HOLLY!!!!
:'''Holly''': Yes, Daddy?
:'''King Thistle''': Please keep Gaston under control.
:'''Holly''': Sorry, Daddy.
:'''King Thistle''': We live in the castle, Gaston lives outside.
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Never mind, Gaston. Let's all go to the great elf tree instead.
:'''Mr. Elf''': Mrs. Elf, that blueberry pie smells delicious.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Yes, Mr. Elf. The secret is to cook it very slowly over 3 days.
:'''Ben''': Hello Mum!
:'''Holly''': Hello!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Hello Ben, Hello Holly!
:'''Mr. Elf''': Ah, Can't he shake himself outside?
:'''Mrs. Elf''': That pie is not for you, Gaston! Now Ben, Gaston should live outside, we live inside.
:'''Ben''': Okay, Mum.
:'''Mr. Elf''': AGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Where's the pie gone?!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Gaston's eating it!
:'''Holly''': We don't know it was Gaston.
:'''Ben''': It could have been someone else.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': He's the only one with pie on his face!
:'''Mr. Elf''': &lt;big&gt; ''[crossly]'' Out Gaston, I never want to see you again.&lt;/big&gt;
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Sorry, Gaston.
:'''Holly''': You'd better go home.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Go on, Gaston! Off you go!
:'''Queen Thistle''': Bedtime, Holly! ''[Holly sighs]'' Are you all right, darling?
:'''Holly''': I'm a bit sad. Gaston isn't allowed in our houses anymore. ''[Gaston is howling.]'' Gaston! Oh, Gaston is all wet and cold.
:'''King Thistle''': Gaston, go and make that rucket somewhere else!
:'''Holly''': Poor Gaston. ''[rooster crowing]'' Gaston!
Holly: Gaston? Ben: Gaston?, Holly: Gaston!, Ben: Gaston, Holly: hello, Ben, I can’t find Gaston anywhere,

===''Nanny's Magic Test''===
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I'm taking away your wand!
:'''Nanny Plum''': You can't do that!
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I just did.
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's an outrage! The king will be very angry!
:''[cut to the Little Castle]''
:'''King Thistle''': ''[laughing out loud]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's not funny!
:'''King Thistle''': You're right, it's not funny. ''[keeps laughing]''
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Nanny does not have a license, she must not do magic!
:'''King Thistle''': Yes, yes, Wise Old Elf. But maybe we can overlook it just this once as it's Nanny?

===''Dolly Plum''===
:'''Nanny Plum''': Oh, Thanks, Holly.
:''[Daisy and Poppy are crying again.]''
:'''Holly:''' Now the twins are crying again.
:'''Ben:''' I know the elves could make a nanny plum doll, elves are good at making things and I’m an elf [he blows a horn],
===''Daisy and Poppy Go Bananas''===
:'''Queen and King Thistle''': ''[screaming]''
:'''King Thistle''': What on Earth is going on?!
:'''Queen Thistle''': It's an indoor thunderstorm!
:'''King Thistle''': I wonder if they had something to do with Granny.
:''[rooster crows]''

===''Gaston's Birthday''===
:'''King Thistle''': ''[sighing happily]'' I do like a nice relaxing bath. It's good to get away from all that talk about birthdays. 
:''[King Thistle hears splashing sounds.]''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': Happy Birthday, your majesty! ''[he blows a party horn]''
:'''King Thistle''': ''[screaming loudly]'' Get out of my bath, and it's not my birthday!
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': I know, this is a dry run.
:'''King Thistle''': Now see here, I don't want any birthday stuff.
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': ''[sighs]'' That's what you say every year. 
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''LOOK, I DON'T WANT A CAKE, I DON'T WANT A SONG, AND I DON'T WANT A PIRATE IN MY BATH!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': So, you really don't want a party? 
:'''King Thistle''': No, I don't want a party, not this year, not next year, and not at any year. Never, no more parties!
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' And that's when he started shouting, he was a tiny bit angry.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' So, he really doesn't want a party?
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' No.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' (sadly) Oh, dear. What will we do with the presents we wrapped?
===''The Mermaid''===
:''[Holly, Ben, Nanny Plum, Gaston and Mr. Elf heard a distant crying noise.]''
:'''Holly''': Listen, somebody's crying!
:''[It was Oceana, the mermaid, who lost her mirror, and is crying.]''
:'''Holly''': It's a girl! Hello, what are you doing in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': I live here.
:'''Holly''': You live in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': Yes. I'm a mermaid. ''[dives to the sea and floats back up]'' My name is Oceana.
:'''Holly''': Why were you crying?
:'''Oceana''': l've lost my mirror.
:'''Holly''': That must be the mirror Lucy found.
:'''Oceana''': And where is this Lucy?
:'''Holly''': She's a big girl, so she'll be on her way to school.

===''Ben &amp; Holly's Christmas''===
====Episode 1====
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Hello. We've come to see the Christmas trees.
:'''Father Christmas''': Ho ho ho!
:'''Man''': Hello, Father Christmas. I like the outfit. What fashion is it exactly?
:'''Father Christmas''': Uh, It's meant to be a disguise.
:'''Holly''': So many lovely Christmas trees.
:'''Woman''': Yes, pine elves are very good at growing Christmas trees.
:'''All''': And we're pine elves!
====Episode 2====
:'''King Thistle''': ''[gasps indignantly]'' ''[crossly]'' Oof, let me out….!

==Cast==
*Preston Nyman - Ben
*Sian Taylor - Holly
*Taig McNab - Gaston

==External links==
*{{imdb title|1436544|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom}}
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:2000s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Nick Jr. shows]]
[[Category:Flash animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Treehouse TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK preschool education TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>h5pkyklcknl839la2b3dp13z969nh0w</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965081</id>
      <parentid>3965073</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:03:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-34778-23</username>
        <id>3341197</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Gaston's Birthday */</comment>
      <origin>3965081</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9513" sha1="inalnro4677rboj2wbjej9952s1s1sf" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]]''''' (2009–2013) is a British animated children's television series aimed at children originally broadcast on Nickelodeon UK.

==Opening==
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' Somewhere, hidden amongst thorny brambles is a Little Kingdom of elves and fairies. Everyone who lives here is very, very small.
:'''Ben''': I'm Ben Elf.
:'''Holly''': I'm Princess Holly. Come on, let's play!
:'''Ben''': Wait for us!
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' [[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]].

==Season 1 (2008-2011)==
===''Holly's Magic Wand''===
:'''Holly''': I'm sure I left my wand here. It's gone! ''[Holly is crying.]''
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly.
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': What's wrong?
:'''Holly''': I've lost my wand. I can't do magic anymore.
:'''Ben''': Maybe that's a good thing.
:'''Holly''': It's not funny! I'm never going to find my wand and I'll be sad forever. ''[She cries again.]''
:'''Ben''': Cheer up, Holly. I will find your wand.
:'''Holly''': How?
:'''Ben''': Elves are very good at finding things, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:'''Holly''': Thanks, Ben.

===''Elf Joke Day''=== 
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly. I've got a new toy.
:'''Holly''': What is it?
:'''Ben''': It's a telescope. You can see things that are really far away.
:'''Holly''': Wow! Can I have a go?
:'''Ben''': ''[hands the telescope to Holly]'' Okay.
:'''Holly''': ''[holds the telescope to her eye]'' I can't see anything.
:'''Ben''': Try twisting it a bit.
:'''Holly''': ''[twists the telescope a bit]'' It still doesn't work. ''[she puts the telescope off her eye, revealing a black ring around it]''
:''[Ben starts laughing.]''
:'''Holly''': Why are you laughing, Ben?
:'''Ben''': It's a joke telescope! It gives you a black ring around your eye that makes you look really silly! Look! ''[grabs a spyglass to make Holly look at it]''
:'''Holly''': Ah! Why did you do that?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[opening the door]'' Let's go and join in the fun! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': ''[screaming while breaking the toy mouse]'' Help! 
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[entering with Ben and Holly]'' Ho-ho-ho. Happy Elf Joke Day! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': That was not funny, Wise Old Elf.

===''Morning, Noon, and Night''===
:''[rooster crows]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': That's the cockerel crow, Princess Holly! Time for fairies to get up!

===''Betty Caterpillar''===
:'''Holly''': Look, Betty Caterpillar is sad.
:''[Betty starts crying.]''
:'''Ben''': I think she feels a bit left out. ''[Gaston the Ladybird and Bobby the Bee are having fun flying. Betty is crying again.]'' I know how to cheer her up.
:'''Holly''': Oh, good. Go on then, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Don't be sad, Betty. Flying isn't everything. Elve's can't fly, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:''[Betty cries again.]''
:'''Holly''': That didn't cheer her up much. ''[Betty cries once again.]'' Maybe I can make her fly by magic.
:'''Ben''': Can you do that?
:'''Holly''': Um, I think so.

===''Picnic on the Moon''===
:'''Ben''': (''o.s.'') Today's adventure starts... In Outer Space!
:''[The scene pans up to the moon, the title Picnic on the Moon appears.]''
:'''Ben and Holly''': (''o.s.'') Picnic on the Moon!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' That's the last straw, No water in the sea and we can't eat food, What kind of picnic is this?
:'''Mr. Elf:''' ''[shouting]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''IT'S NOT A PICNIC!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' Ok, let's go home.
:'''King Thistle:''' nanny plum’s right, it’s time to go,
==Season 2 (2011-2014)==
===''Gaston to the Rescue''===
:'''King Thistle:''' Ewww, who let this smelly ladybird in the house?!

:'''Queen Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]''
:'''King Thistle''': HOLLY!!!!
:'''Holly''': Yes, Daddy?
:'''King Thistle''': Please keep Gaston under control.
:'''Holly''': Sorry, Daddy.
:'''King Thistle''': We live in the castle, Gaston lives outside.
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Never mind, Gaston. Let's all go to the great elf tree instead.
:'''Mr. Elf''': Mrs. Elf, that blueberry pie smells delicious.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Yes, Mr. Elf. The secret is to cook it very slowly over 3 days.
:'''Ben''': Hello Mum!
:'''Holly''': Hello!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Hello Ben, Hello Holly!
:'''Mr. Elf''': Ah, Can't he shake himself outside?
:'''Mrs. Elf''': That pie is not for you, Gaston! Now Ben, Gaston should live outside, we live inside.
:'''Ben''': Okay, Mum.
:'''Mr. Elf''': AGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Where's the pie gone?!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Gaston's eating it!
:'''Holly''': We don't know it was Gaston.
:'''Ben''': It could have been someone else.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': He's the only one with pie on his face!
:'''Mr. Elf''': &lt;big&gt; ''[crossly]'' Out Gaston, I never want to see you again.&lt;/big&gt;
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Sorry, Gaston.
:'''Holly''': You'd better go home.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Go on, Gaston! Off you go!
:'''Queen Thistle''': Bedtime, Holly! ''[Holly sighs]'' Are you all right, darling?
:'''Holly''': I'm a bit sad. Gaston isn't allowed in our houses anymore. ''[Gaston is howling.]'' Gaston! Oh, Gaston is all wet and cold.
:'''King Thistle''': Gaston, go and make that rucket somewhere else!
:'''Holly''': Poor Gaston. ''[rooster crowing]'' Gaston!
Holly: Gaston? Ben: Gaston?, Holly: Gaston!, Ben: Gaston, Holly: hello, Ben, I can’t find Gaston anywhere,

===''Nanny's Magic Test''===
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I'm taking away your wand!
:'''Nanny Plum''': You can't do that!
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I just did.
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's an outrage! The king will be very angry!
:''[cut to the Little Castle]''
:'''King Thistle''': ''[laughing out loud]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's not funny!
:'''King Thistle''': You're right, it's not funny. ''[keeps laughing]''
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Nanny does not have a license, she must not do magic!
:'''King Thistle''': Yes, yes, Wise Old Elf. But maybe we can overlook it just this once as it's Nanny?

===''Dolly Plum''===
:'''Nanny Plum''': Oh, Thanks, Holly.
:''[Daisy and Poppy are crying again.]''
:'''Holly:''' Now the twins are crying again.
:'''Ben:''' I know the elves could make a nanny plum doll, elves are good at making things and I’m an elf [he blows a horn],
===''Daisy and Poppy Go Bananas''===
:'''Queen and King Thistle''': ''[screaming]''
:'''King Thistle''': What on Earth is going on?!
:'''Queen Thistle''': It's an indoor thunderstorm!
:'''King Thistle''': I wonder if they had something to do with Granny.
:''[rooster crows]''

===''Gaston's Birthday''===
:'''King Thistle''': ''[sighing happily]'' I do like a nice relaxing bath, It's good to get away from all that talk about birthdays.
:''[King Thistle hears splashing sounds.]''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': Happy Birthday, your majesty! ''[he blows a party horn]''
:'''King Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]'' '''''GET OUT OF MY BATH, IT'S NOT MY BIRTHDAY!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': I know, this is a dry run.
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''NOW SEE HERE, I DON'T WANT ANY BIRTHDAY STUFF!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': ''[sighs]'' That's what you say every year. 
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''LOOK, I DON'T WANT A CAKE, I DON'T WANT A SONG, AND I DON'T WANT A PIRATE IN MY BATH!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': So, you really don't want a party? 
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''NOOOOOO!!! I DON'T WANT A PARTY, NOT THIS YEAR, NOT NEXT YEAR, NOT ANY YEAR, &lt;big&gt;NEVER! NO!!!!!!!!!!! PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;'''''
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' And that's when he started shouting, he was a tiny bit angry.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' So he really doesn't want a party?
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' No.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' (sadly) Oh dear, What will we do with the presents we wrapped?
===''The Mermaid''===
:''[Holly, Ben, Nanny Plum, Gaston and Mr. Elf heard a distant crying noise.]''
:'''Holly''': Listen, somebody's crying!
:''[It was Oceana, the mermaid, who lost her mirror, and is crying.]''
:'''Holly''': It's a girl! Hello, what are you doing in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': I live here.
:'''Holly''': You live in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': Yes. I'm a mermaid. ''[dives to the sea and floats back up]'' My name is Oceana.
:'''Holly''': Why were you crying?
:'''Oceana''': l've lost my mirror.
:'''Holly''': That must be the mirror Lucy found.
:'''Oceana''': And where is this Lucy?
:'''Holly''': She's a big girl, so she'll be on her way to school.

===''Ben &amp; Holly's Christmas''===
====Episode 1====
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Hello. We've come to see the Christmas trees.
:'''Father Christmas''': Ho ho ho!
:'''Man''': Hello, Father Christmas. I like the outfit. What fashion is it exactly?
:'''Father Christmas''': Uh, It's meant to be a disguise.
:'''Holly''': So many lovely Christmas trees.
:'''Woman''': Yes, pine elves are very good at growing Christmas trees.
:'''All''': And we're pine elves!
====Episode 2====
:'''King Thistle''': ''[gasps indignantly]'' ''[crossly]'' Oof, let me out….!

==Cast==
*Preston Nyman - Ben
*Sian Taylor - Holly
*Taig McNab - Gaston

==External links==
*{{imdb title|1436544|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom}}
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:2000s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Nick Jr. shows]]
[[Category:Flash animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Treehouse TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK preschool education TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>inalnro4677rboj2wbjej9952s1s1sf</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965084</id>
      <parentid>3965081</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:16:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-34778-23</username>
        <id>3341197</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Daisy and Poppy Go Bananas */</comment>
      <origin>3965084</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9511" sha1="if8oon8ejraw07gm9agn07l9wddcrg8" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]]''''' (2009–2013) is a British animated children's television series aimed at children originally broadcast on Nickelodeon UK.

==Opening==
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' Somewhere, hidden amongst thorny brambles is a Little Kingdom of elves and fairies. Everyone who lives here is very, very small.
:'''Ben''': I'm Ben Elf.
:'''Holly''': I'm Princess Holly. Come on, let's play!
:'''Ben''': Wait for us!
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' [[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]].

==Season 1 (2008-2011)==
===''Holly's Magic Wand''===
:'''Holly''': I'm sure I left my wand here. It's gone! ''[Holly is crying.]''
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly.
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': What's wrong?
:'''Holly''': I've lost my wand. I can't do magic anymore.
:'''Ben''': Maybe that's a good thing.
:'''Holly''': It's not funny! I'm never going to find my wand and I'll be sad forever. ''[She cries again.]''
:'''Ben''': Cheer up, Holly. I will find your wand.
:'''Holly''': How?
:'''Ben''': Elves are very good at finding things, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:'''Holly''': Thanks, Ben.

===''Elf Joke Day''=== 
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly. I've got a new toy.
:'''Holly''': What is it?
:'''Ben''': It's a telescope. You can see things that are really far away.
:'''Holly''': Wow! Can I have a go?
:'''Ben''': ''[hands the telescope to Holly]'' Okay.
:'''Holly''': ''[holds the telescope to her eye]'' I can't see anything.
:'''Ben''': Try twisting it a bit.
:'''Holly''': ''[twists the telescope a bit]'' It still doesn't work. ''[she puts the telescope off her eye, revealing a black ring around it]''
:''[Ben starts laughing.]''
:'''Holly''': Why are you laughing, Ben?
:'''Ben''': It's a joke telescope! It gives you a black ring around your eye that makes you look really silly! Look! ''[grabs a spyglass to make Holly look at it]''
:'''Holly''': Ah! Why did you do that?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[opening the door]'' Let's go and join in the fun! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': ''[screaming while breaking the toy mouse]'' Help! 
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[entering with Ben and Holly]'' Ho-ho-ho. Happy Elf Joke Day! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': That was not funny, Wise Old Elf.

===''Morning, Noon, and Night''===
:''[rooster crows]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': That's the cockerel crow, Princess Holly! Time for fairies to get up!

===''Betty Caterpillar''===
:'''Holly''': Look, Betty Caterpillar is sad.
:''[Betty starts crying.]''
:'''Ben''': I think she feels a bit left out. ''[Gaston the Ladybird and Bobby the Bee are having fun flying. Betty is crying again.]'' I know how to cheer her up.
:'''Holly''': Oh, good. Go on then, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Don't be sad, Betty. Flying isn't everything. Elve's can't fly, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:''[Betty cries again.]''
:'''Holly''': That didn't cheer her up much. ''[Betty cries once again.]'' Maybe I can make her fly by magic.
:'''Ben''': Can you do that?
:'''Holly''': Um, I think so.

===''Picnic on the Moon''===
:'''Ben''': (''o.s.'') Today's adventure starts... In Outer Space!
:''[The scene pans up to the moon, the title Picnic on the Moon appears.]''
:'''Ben and Holly''': (''o.s.'') Picnic on the Moon!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' That's the last straw, No water in the sea and we can't eat food, What kind of picnic is this?
:'''Mr. Elf:''' ''[shouting]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''IT'S NOT A PICNIC!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' Ok, let's go home.
:'''King Thistle:''' nanny plum’s right, it’s time to go,
==Season 2 (2011-2014)==
===''Gaston to the Rescue''===
:'''King Thistle:''' Ewww, who let this smelly ladybird in the house?!

:'''Queen Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]''
:'''King Thistle''': HOLLY!!!!
:'''Holly''': Yes, Daddy?
:'''King Thistle''': Please keep Gaston under control.
:'''Holly''': Sorry, Daddy.
:'''King Thistle''': We live in the castle, Gaston lives outside.
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Never mind, Gaston. Let's all go to the great elf tree instead.
:'''Mr. Elf''': Mrs. Elf, that blueberry pie smells delicious.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Yes, Mr. Elf. The secret is to cook it very slowly over 3 days.
:'''Ben''': Hello Mum!
:'''Holly''': Hello!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Hello Ben, Hello Holly!
:'''Mr. Elf''': Ah, Can't he shake himself outside?
:'''Mrs. Elf''': That pie is not for you, Gaston! Now Ben, Gaston should live outside, we live inside.
:'''Ben''': Okay, Mum.
:'''Mr. Elf''': AGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Where's the pie gone?!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Gaston's eating it!
:'''Holly''': We don't know it was Gaston.
:'''Ben''': It could have been someone else.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': He's the only one with pie on his face!
:'''Mr. Elf''': &lt;big&gt; ''[crossly]'' Out Gaston, I never want to see you again.&lt;/big&gt;
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Sorry, Gaston.
:'''Holly''': You'd better go home.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Go on, Gaston! Off you go!
:'''Queen Thistle''': Bedtime, Holly! ''[Holly sighs]'' Are you all right, darling?
:'''Holly''': I'm a bit sad. Gaston isn't allowed in our houses anymore. ''[Gaston is howling.]'' Gaston! Oh, Gaston is all wet and cold.
:'''King Thistle''': Gaston, go and make that rucket somewhere else!
:'''Holly''': Poor Gaston. ''[rooster crowing]'' Gaston!
Holly: Gaston? Ben: Gaston?, Holly: Gaston!, Ben: Gaston, Holly: hello, Ben, I can’t find Gaston anywhere,

===''Nanny's Magic Test''===
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I'm taking away your wand!
:'''Nanny Plum''': You can't do that!
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I just did.
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's an outrage! The king will be very angry!
:''[cut to the Little Castle]''
:'''King Thistle''': ''[laughing out loud]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's not funny!
:'''King Thistle''': You're right, it's not funny. ''[keeps laughing]''
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Nanny does not have a license, she must not do magic!
:'''King Thistle''': Yes, yes, Wise Old Elf. But maybe we can overlook it just this once as it's Nanny?

===''Dolly Plum''===
:'''Nanny Plum''': Oh, Thanks, Holly.
:''[Daisy and Poppy are crying again.]''
:'''Holly:''' Now the twins are crying again.
:'''Ben:''' I know the elves could make a nanny plum doll, elves are good at making things and I’m an elf [he blows a horn],
===''Daisy and Poppy Go Bananas''===
:'''Queen &amp; King Thistle:''' ''[screaming]''
:'''King Thistle:''' What on Earth is going on?!
:'''Queen Thistle:''' It's an indoor thunderstorm!
:'''King Thistle:''' I wonder if they had something to do with Granny.
:''[rooster crows]''

===''Gaston's Birthday''===
:'''King Thistle''': ''[sighing happily]'' I do like a nice relaxing bath, It's good to get away from all that talk about birthdays.
:''[King Thistle hears splashing sounds.]''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': Happy Birthday, your majesty! ''[he blows a party horn]''
:'''King Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]'' '''''GET OUT OF MY BATH, IT'S NOT MY BIRTHDAY!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': I know, this is a dry run.
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''NOW SEE HERE, I DON'T WANT ANY BIRTHDAY STUFF!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': ''[sighs]'' That's what you say every year. 
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''LOOK, I DON'T WANT A CAKE, I DON'T WANT A SONG, AND I DON'T WANT A PIRATE IN MY BATH!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate''': So, you really don't want a party? 
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''NOOOOOO!!! I DON'T WANT A PARTY, NOT THIS YEAR, NOT NEXT YEAR, NOT ANY YEAR, &lt;big&gt;NEVER! NO!!!!!!!!!!! PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;'''''
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' And that's when he started shouting, he was a tiny bit angry.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' So he really doesn't want a party?
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' No.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' (sadly) Oh dear, What will we do with the presents we wrapped?
===''The Mermaid''===
:''[Holly, Ben, Nanny Plum, Gaston and Mr. Elf heard a distant crying noise.]''
:'''Holly''': Listen, somebody's crying!
:''[It was Oceana, the mermaid, who lost her mirror, and is crying.]''
:'''Holly''': It's a girl! Hello, what are you doing in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': I live here.
:'''Holly''': You live in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': Yes. I'm a mermaid. ''[dives to the sea and floats back up]'' My name is Oceana.
:'''Holly''': Why were you crying?
:'''Oceana''': l've lost my mirror.
:'''Holly''': That must be the mirror Lucy found.
:'''Oceana''': And where is this Lucy?
:'''Holly''': She's a big girl, so she'll be on her way to school.

===''Ben &amp; Holly's Christmas''===
====Episode 1====
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Hello. We've come to see the Christmas trees.
:'''Father Christmas''': Ho ho ho!
:'''Man''': Hello, Father Christmas. I like the outfit. What fashion is it exactly?
:'''Father Christmas''': Uh, It's meant to be a disguise.
:'''Holly''': So many lovely Christmas trees.
:'''Woman''': Yes, pine elves are very good at growing Christmas trees.
:'''All''': And we're pine elves!
====Episode 2====
:'''King Thistle''': ''[gasps indignantly]'' ''[crossly]'' Oof, let me out….!

==Cast==
*Preston Nyman - Ben
*Sian Taylor - Holly
*Taig McNab - Gaston

==External links==
*{{imdb title|1436544|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom}}
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:2000s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Nick Jr. shows]]
[[Category:Flash animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Treehouse TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK preschool education TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>if8oon8ejraw07gm9agn07l9wddcrg8</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965191</id>
      <parentid>3965084</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T05:41:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-34778-23</username>
        <id>3341197</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Gaston's Birthday */</comment>
      <origin>3965191</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9509" sha1="9s1r80jmgdl8rrwinrvqrxjac8uafa2" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]]''''' (2009–2013) is a British animated children's television series aimed at children originally broadcast on Nickelodeon UK.

==Opening==
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' Somewhere, hidden amongst thorny brambles is a Little Kingdom of elves and fairies. Everyone who lives here is very, very small.
:'''Ben''': I'm Ben Elf.
:'''Holly''': I'm Princess Holly. Come on, let's play!
:'''Ben''': Wait for us!
:'''Holly''': ''[voiceover]'' [[w:Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom]].

==Season 1 (2008-2011)==
===''Holly's Magic Wand''===
:'''Holly''': I'm sure I left my wand here. It's gone! ''[Holly is crying.]''
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly.
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': What's wrong?
:'''Holly''': I've lost my wand. I can't do magic anymore.
:'''Ben''': Maybe that's a good thing.
:'''Holly''': It's not funny! I'm never going to find my wand and I'll be sad forever. ''[She cries again.]''
:'''Ben''': Cheer up, Holly. I will find your wand.
:'''Holly''': How?
:'''Ben''': Elves are very good at finding things, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:'''Holly''': Thanks, Ben.

===''Elf Joke Day''=== 
:'''Holly''': Hi, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Hi, Holly. I've got a new toy.
:'''Holly''': What is it?
:'''Ben''': It's a telescope. You can see things that are really far away.
:'''Holly''': Wow! Can I have a go?
:'''Ben''': ''[hands the telescope to Holly]'' Okay.
:'''Holly''': ''[holds the telescope to her eye]'' I can't see anything.
:'''Ben''': Try twisting it a bit.
:'''Holly''': ''[twists the telescope a bit]'' It still doesn't work. ''[she puts the telescope off her eye, revealing a black ring around it]''
:''[Ben starts laughing.]''
:'''Holly''': Why are you laughing, Ben?
:'''Ben''': It's a joke telescope! It gives you a black ring around your eye that makes you look really silly! Look! ''[grabs a spyglass to make Holly look at it]''
:'''Holly''': Ah! Why did you do that?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[opening the door]'' Let's go and join in the fun! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': ''[screaming while breaking the toy mouse]'' Help! 
:'''Wise Old Elf''': ''[entering with Ben and Holly]'' Ho-ho-ho. Happy Elf Joke Day! 
:'''Nanny Plum''': That was not funny, Wise Old Elf.

===''Morning, Noon, and Night''===
:''[rooster crows]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': That's the cockerel crow, Princess Holly! Time for fairies to get up!

===''Betty Caterpillar''===
:'''Holly''': Look, Betty Caterpillar is sad.
:''[Betty starts crying.]''
:'''Ben''': I think she feels a bit left out. ''[Gaston the Ladybird and Bobby the Bee are having fun flying. Betty is crying again.]'' I know how to cheer her up.
:'''Holly''': Oh, good. Go on then, Ben.
:'''Ben''': Don't be sad, Betty. Flying isn't everything. Elve's can't fly, and I'm an elf. ''[blows trumpet]''
:''[Betty cries again.]''
:'''Holly''': That didn't cheer her up much. ''[Betty cries once again.]'' Maybe I can make her fly by magic.
:'''Ben''': Can you do that?
:'''Holly''': Um, I think so.

===''Picnic on the Moon''===
:'''Ben''': (''o.s.'') Today's adventure starts... In Outer Space!
:''[The scene pans up to the moon, the title Picnic on the Moon appears.]''
:'''Ben and Holly''': (''o.s.'') Picnic on the Moon!
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' That's the last straw, No water in the sea and we can't eat food, What kind of picnic is this?
:'''Mr. Elf:''' ''[shouting]'' &lt;big&gt;'''''IT'S NOT A PICNIC!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Nanny Plum:''' Ok, let's go home.
:'''King Thistle:''' nanny plum’s right, it’s time to go,
==Season 2 (2011-2014)==
===''Gaston to the Rescue''===
:'''King Thistle:''' Ewww, who let this smelly ladybird in the house?!

:'''Queen Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]''
:'''King Thistle''': HOLLY!!!!
:'''Holly''': Yes, Daddy?
:'''King Thistle''': Please keep Gaston under control.
:'''Holly''': Sorry, Daddy.
:'''King Thistle''': We live in the castle, Gaston lives outside.
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Never mind, Gaston. Let's all go to the great elf tree instead.
:'''Mr. Elf''': Mrs. Elf, that blueberry pie smells delicious.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Yes, Mr. Elf. The secret is to cook it very slowly over 3 days.
:'''Ben''': Hello Mum!
:'''Holly''': Hello!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Hello Ben, Hello Holly!
:'''Mr. Elf''': Ah, Can't he shake himself outside?
:'''Mrs. Elf''': That pie is not for you, Gaston! Now Ben, Gaston should live outside, we live inside.
:'''Ben''': Okay, Mum.
:'''Mr. Elf''': AGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Where's the pie gone?!
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Gaston's eating it!
:'''Holly''': We don't know it was Gaston.
:'''Ben''': It could have been someone else.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': He's the only one with pie on his face!
:'''Mr. Elf''': &lt;big&gt; ''[crossly]'' Out Gaston, I never want to see you again.&lt;/big&gt;
:''[Gaston is whining.]''
:'''Ben''': Sorry, Gaston.
:'''Holly''': You'd better go home.
:'''Mrs. Elf''': Go on, Gaston! Off you go!
:'''Queen Thistle''': Bedtime, Holly! ''[Holly sighs]'' Are you all right, darling?
:'''Holly''': I'm a bit sad. Gaston isn't allowed in our houses anymore. ''[Gaston is howling.]'' Gaston! Oh, Gaston is all wet and cold.
:'''King Thistle''': Gaston, go and make that rucket somewhere else!
:'''Holly''': Poor Gaston. ''[rooster crowing]'' Gaston!
Holly: Gaston? Ben: Gaston?, Holly: Gaston!, Ben: Gaston, Holly: hello, Ben, I can’t find Gaston anywhere,

===''Nanny's Magic Test''===
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I'm taking away your wand!
:'''Nanny Plum''': You can't do that!
:'''Wise Old Elf''': I just did.
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's an outrage! The king will be very angry!
:''[cut to the Little Castle]''
:'''King Thistle''': ''[laughing out loud]''
:'''Nanny Plum''': It's not funny!
:'''King Thistle''': You're right, it's not funny. ''[keeps laughing]''
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Nanny does not have a license, she must not do magic!
:'''King Thistle''': Yes, yes, Wise Old Elf. But maybe we can overlook it just this once as it's Nanny?

===''Dolly Plum''===
:'''Nanny Plum''': Oh, Thanks, Holly.
:''[Daisy and Poppy are crying again.]''
:'''Holly:''' Now the twins are crying again.
:'''Ben:''' I know the elves could make a nanny plum doll, elves are good at making things and I’m an elf [he blows a horn],
===''Daisy and Poppy Go Bananas''===
:'''Queen &amp; King Thistle:''' ''[screaming]''
:'''King Thistle:''' What on Earth is going on?!
:'''Queen Thistle:''' It's an indoor thunderstorm!
:'''King Thistle:''' I wonder if they had something to do with Granny.
:''[rooster crows]''

===''Gaston's Birthday''===
:'''King Thistle:''' ''[sighing happily]'' I do like a nice relaxing bath, It's good to get away from all that talk about birthdays.
:''[King Thistle hears splashing sounds.]''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate:''' Happy Birthday, your majesty! ''[he blows a party horn]''
:'''King Thistle:''' ''[screaming loudly]'' '''''GET OUT OF MY BATH, IT'S NOT MY BIRTHDAY!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate:''' I know, this is a dry run.
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''NOW SEE HERE, I DON'T WANT ANY BIRTHDAY STUFF!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate:''' ''[sighs]'' That's what you say every year. 
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''LOOK, I DON'T WANT A CAKE, I DON'T WANT A SONG, AND I DON'T WANT A PIRATE IN MY BATH!'''''
:'''Redbeard the Elf Pirate:''' So you really don't want a party?
:'''King Thistle:''' '''''NOOOOOO!!! I DON'T WANT A PARTY, NOT THIS YEAR, NOT NEXT YEAR, NOT ANY YEAR, &lt;big&gt;NEVER! NO!!!!!!!!!!! PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;'''''
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' And that's when he started shouting, he was a tiny bit angry.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' So he really doesn't want a party?
:'''Redbeard The Elf Pirate:''' No.
:'''Queen Thistle:''' (sadly) Oh dear, What will we do with the presents we wrapped?
===''The Mermaid''===
:''[Holly, Ben, Nanny Plum, Gaston and Mr. Elf heard a distant crying noise.]''
:'''Holly''': Listen, somebody's crying!
:''[It was Oceana, the mermaid, who lost her mirror, and is crying.]''
:'''Holly''': It's a girl! Hello, what are you doing in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': I live here.
:'''Holly''': You live in The Lake?
:'''Oceana''': Yes. I'm a mermaid. ''[dives to the sea and floats back up]'' My name is Oceana.
:'''Holly''': Why were you crying?
:'''Oceana''': l've lost my mirror.
:'''Holly''': That must be the mirror Lucy found.
:'''Oceana''': And where is this Lucy?
:'''Holly''': She's a big girl, so she'll be on her way to school.

===''Ben &amp; Holly's Christmas''===
====Episode 1====
:'''Wise Old Elf''': Hello. We've come to see the Christmas trees.
:'''Father Christmas''': Ho ho ho!
:'''Man''': Hello, Father Christmas. I like the outfit. What fashion is it exactly?
:'''Father Christmas''': Uh, It's meant to be a disguise.
:'''Holly''': So many lovely Christmas trees.
:'''Woman''': Yes, pine elves are very good at growing Christmas trees.
:'''All''': And we're pine elves!
====Episode 2====
:'''King Thistle''': ''[gasps indignantly]'' ''[crossly]'' Oof, let me out….!

==Cast==
*Preston Nyman - Ben
*Sian Taylor - Holly
*Taig McNab - Gaston

==External links==
*{{imdb title|1436544|Ben &amp; Holly's Little Kingdom}}
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:2000s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:2010s UK animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about children]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Nick Jr. shows]]
[[Category:Flash animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Treehouse TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK children's animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:UK preschool education TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>9s1r80jmgdl8rrwinrvqrxjac8uafa2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Scooby-Doo! and Kiss: Rock and Roll Mystery</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>229922</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965138</id>
      <parentid>3951619</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:14:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965138</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3736" sha1="kow5rw2sfbhz1jo4izsumsj8vnbsme4" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Scooby-Doo! and Kiss: Rock and Roll Mystery|Scooby-Doo! and Kiss: Rock and Roll Mystery]]''''' is a 2015 direct-to-DVD animated comedy mystery film, and the 24th film in the direct-to-video series of Scooby-Doo films. The film features Scooby and the gang solving a mystery in KISS World. It was released on on July 21, 2015 by Warner Home Video. 

{{film-stub}}

== Mystery Inc. ==
=== {{w|Scooby-Doo (character)|Scooby-Doo}} ===
* Scooby-Dooby-Doo!
=== {{w|Norville &quot;Shaggy&quot; Rogers}} ===
=== {{w|Fred Jones}} ===
=== {{w|Daphne Blake}} ===
=== {{w|Velma Dinkley}} ===

==Dialogue==
:'''Daphne''': Starchild, do you mind if I ask where you get your super powers from?
:'''Starchild''': ''[plays the guitar]'' Rock and Roll. It powers everything in KISSteria.
:'''Velma''': ''[plays the bass guitar]'' I don't know. Maybe I can find friends with normal interests.
:'''Demon''': Be careful with that bass.
:'''Velma''': Because it's made from alien technology?
:'''Demon''': Because it costs more than your house.
:''[Velma is surprised and stops playing the bass guitar]''
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Crimson Witch''': Give me...
:'''Demon''': Rock. We get it.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Catman''': ''[grabs the dispenser from the Crimson Witch]'' Look, she hid gas dispensers in her cape.
:''[Crimson Witch chases Shaggy with a diamond and Scooby]''
:'''Spaceman''': ''[grabs the Crimson Witch's belt]'' And here's the magnetic repulsor-field belt she used for flying. Ooh. ''[reads]'' &quot;Quest Research Laboratories&quot;. Good stuff. ''[activates the belt to float]''
:'''Starchild''': All stolen from her previous employer.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Daphne''': Thanks, Starchild. KISS has been on witch watch ever since we passed out.
:'''Shaggy''': So, like, who's the witch?
:'''Velma''': I thought you'd have guessed when we opened her locker, Shaggy. ''[unmasks the Crimson Witch]'' She's Delilah Domino, the head of security.
:''[Manny Goldman, two security guards, Chikara, Shandi Strutter and Chip McGhoo arrive]''
:'''Manny''': Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. Delilah, I knew it. I didn't really know it, but, you know, I like to be smart. I'm the boss.
:'''Chikara''': Curious. I didn't see that coming.
:'''Shandi''': How did you know?
:'''Velma''': When Delilah mentioned that she worked for a government defense company, we did some research. Turns out, they specialized in lasers.
:'''Shaggy and Scooby''': So?
:'''Fred''': Lasers that use black diamonds, guys.
:'''Daphne''': She was hoping to steal it from here, and sell it to a competing defense company since she was fired from the last one.
:'''Fred''': She was also the one stealing your chemicals, so she could make her witch gas. As head of security, she would've had another keycard to your lab.
:'''Velma''': And while everyone was watching the concert, she hid the diamond here in her locker.
:''[Two security guards take Delilah into custody]''
:'''Delilah''': My plan was perfect. And I would've gotten away with it too if it hadn't been for you meddling KISS. Er, uh, kids. You meddling kids.
:'''Chip''': Note to self: KISS handcuffs.
&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Last lines]''
:'''Shaggy''': Did you see?
:'''Scooby''': Did you?
:''[Shaggy and Scooby run to catch up with Velma, Daphne and Fred, but stop]''
:'''Shaggy''': You think we should tell her ''[Velma]''?
:'''Scooby''': No. Why rock her world?
:'''Shaggy''': Good point.

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{Scooby-Doo}}

{{Authority control}}


[[Category:2015 animated films]]
[[Category:2015 American animated films]]
[[Category:Scooby-Doo direct-to-video animated films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Tony Cervone]]
[[Category:Films directed by Spike Brandt]]
[[Category:Animated films about Halloween]]</text>
      <sha1>kow5rw2sfbhz1jo4izsumsj8vnbsme4</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rescue Me (season 1)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>232444</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965095</id>
      <parentid>3678019</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:01:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39658-80</username>
        <id>3350140</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Guts [1.01] */</comment>
      <origin>3965095</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="40765" sha1="rb5pb9actuag2zda5wl8vzhpwdybt5m" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Rescue Me (season 1)|1]] [[Rescue Me (season 2)|2]] [[Rescue Me (season 3)|3]] [[Rescue Me (season 4)|4]] [[Rescue Me (season 5)|5]] [[Rescue Me (season 6)|6]] [[Rescue Me (season 7)|7]] | [[Rescue Me (American TV series)|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Rescue Me (American TV series)|Rescue Me]]''''' (2004–2011) is an American comedy-drama TV series, airing on [[w:FX (TV channel)|FX]], about the professional and personal lives of [[w:New York City|New York City]] [[w:Firefighter|firefighters]] after the trauma of the [[w:September 11, 2001 attacks|September 11]].

=== ''Guts'' [1.01] ===

:'''Tommy''': You want to know how big my balls are? My balls are bigger than two of your heads duct-taped together. I've been in the middle of shit that would make you piss your pants right now. Uptown, downtown, Harlem, Brooklyn. But there ain't no medals on my chest, assholes, 'cause I ain't no hero. I'm a fireman. We're not in the business of making heroes here. We're in the business of discovering cowards, 'cause that's what you are if you can't take the heat. You're a pussy, and there ain't no room for pussies in the FDNY. ''[to a snickering recruit in the first row]'' What are you laughing at, shithead? Huh? What's so god damn funny?
:'''Recruit''': I just... .
:'''Tommy''': Shut up! You speak when spoken to. You pussies better pray you don't get assigned to my firehouse. Because I have seen it all. I knew sixty men who gave their lives at Ground Zero. Sixty. Four of them from my house. Vito Castella... found him almost whole. Ricky Davis... found him almost whole, hugging a civilian woman. Bobby Vincent... found his head. And my cousin, Jimmy Keefe, my best friend. You know what they found of him? What I was able to bring back and give to his parents? A finger. That's all. A finger. These four men were better human beings and better firefighters than any of you will ever be.
:'''Firefighting Class Instructor''': Say &quot;thank you,&quot; firefighting upper class!
:'''Firefighting Upper Class''': Thank you, Firefighter Gavin, sir!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After everyone gets up and leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, Doc...
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Oh, you don't need to explain, I was at another firehouse last night and the reaction was quite similar.
:'''Tommy''': The guys, uh, they're not gonna talk to a psychotherapist in the firehouse, especially not uh, female one.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': What about the female firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': We don't have any female firefighters in this house.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are you threatened by women?
:'''Tommy''': No.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': You-- you don't seem to think that a woman can be a firefighter.
:'''Tommy''': I'll tell you what, it's not about being a man or a woman, okay? It's about doing the job. It's about me getting home safe and sound in the morning to see my kids, okay? So, you got a woman who can do the job better than the guys on my crew? Bring her on. You know? You got a martian, or a cyborg, or a Chinaman that can do the job, bring them on too.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are there any Chinese firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, probably. Somewhere in... China.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': I'm sensing a lot of hostility.
:'''Tommy''': You are very, very perceptive.
:''Dr. Goldberg''': That's what they tell me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is laying money out on the table]''
:'''Tommy''': Alright, we're going to play a little game because Daddy needs to know some information on Mommy's new boyfriend. Alright? 
:''[they all are silent]''
:'''Katy''': But Mommy doesn't want us to talk about that.
:'''Tommy''': I understand that, sweetheart. That's why we have the money.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': We have sex with woman who ain't our wives and we make every detail available to the other guys.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, well, maybe I'm a gentleman.
:'''Chief''': Yeah, and I'm growing tits.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you should check a mirror, pal.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jimmy''': All right, hold on, hold on, hold on. Let's review. Why are you two separated?
:'''Tommy''': According to her?
:'''Jimmy''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': You know, I... she says I couldn't open up, I wasn't emotionally available, blah, blah, blah.

===''Guts'' [1.01] ===

:'''Tomm''': You want to know how big my balls are? My balls are bigger than two of your heads duct-taped together. I've been in the middle of shit that would make you piss your pants right now. Uptown, downtown, Harlem, Brooklyn. But there ain't no medals on my chest, assholes, 'cause I ain't no hero. I'm a fireman. We're not in the business of making heroes here. We're in the business of discovering cowards, 'cause that's what you are if you can't take the heat. You're a pussy, and there ain't no room for pussies in the FDNY. ''[to a snickering recruit in the first row]'' What are you laughing at, shithead? Huh? What's so god damn funny?
:'''Recruit''': I just... .
:'''Tommy''': Shut up! You speak when spoken to. You pussies better pray you don't get assigned to my firehouse. Because I have seen it all. I knew sixty men who gave their lives at Ground Zero. Sixty. Four of them from my house. Vito Castella... found him almost whole. Ricky Davis... found him almost whole, hugging a civilian woman. Bobby Vincent... found his head. And my cousin, Jimmy Keefe, my best friend. You know what they found of him? What I was able to bring back and give to his parents? A finger. That's all. A finger. These four men were better human beings and better firefighters than any of you will ever be.
:'''Firefighting Class Instructor''': Say &quot;thank you,&quot; firefighting upper class!
:'''Firefighting Upper Class''': Thank you, Firefighter Gavin, sir!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After everyone gets up and leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, Doc...
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Oh, you don't need to explain, I was at another firehouse last night and the reaction was quite similar.
:'''Tommy''': The guys, uh, they're not gonna talk to a psychotherapist in the firehouse, especially not uh, female one.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': What about the female firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': We don't have any female firefighters in this house.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are you threatened by women?
:'''Tommy''': No.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': You-- you don't seem to think that a woman can be a firefighter.
:'''Tommy''': I'll tell you what, it's not about being a man or a woman, okay? It's about doing the job. It's about me getting home safe and sound in the morning to see my kids, okay? So, you got a woman who can do the job better than the guys on my crew? Bring her on. You know? You got a martian, or a cyborg, or a Chinaman that can do the job, bring them on too.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are there any Chinese firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, probably. Somewhere in... China.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': I'm sensing a lot of hostility.
:'''Tommy''': You are very, very perceptive.
:''Dr. Goldberg''': That's what they tell me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is laying money out on the table]''
:'''Tommy''': Alright, we're going to play a little game because Daddy needs to know some information on Mommy's new boyfriend. Alright? 
:''[they all are silent]''
:'''Katy''': But Mommy doesn't want us to talk about that.
:'''Tommy''': I understand that, sweetheart. That's why we have the money.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': We have sex with woman who ain't our wives and we make every detail available to the other guys.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, well, maybe I'm a gentleman.
:'''Chief''': Yeah, and I'm growing tits.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you should check a mirror, pal.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jimmy''': All right, hold on, hold on, hold on. Let's review. Why are you two separated?
:'''Tommy''': According to her?
:'''Jimmy''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': You know, I... she says I couldn't open up, I wasn't emotionally available, blah, blah, blah.

=== ''Gay'' [1.02] ===

:''[Talking about a fireman who retired and them came out of the closet, and also claims to know more gay firemen]''
:'''Sean''': Well, maybe he just thought they were gay because they were well-groomed, and uh, into fashion. You know what I mean?
:'''Chief Reilly, Franco, Lou, and Tommy''': No.
:'''Sean''': Well, maybe they weren't homosexuals. Maybe they were metrosexuals.
:'''Lou''': What?
:'''Tommy''': My daughter used that term last week.
:'''Franco''': The teenager?
:'''Tommy''': The eight-year-old.
:'''Chief Reilly''': What in the sweet chocolate christ is a metrosexual?
:'''Mike''': It means that you aren't gay but you like to do certain things that might be considered gay. ''[they all stare at him, looking totally clueless and in shock]'' Right?
:'''Sean''': No, asshole. He doesn't know what the hell he's talkin' about. Look, a metrosexual is like a straight guy who happens to you know, also like to go shoppin' and-- and get facials and stuff.
:'''Tommy''': Holy shit.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shoppin' for food?
:'''Mike''': Nice food.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, and wine, and... clothes. Yeah, I'm not explaining it right. Franco you know what a metrosexual is, right?
:'''Franco''': Uh, that would be a huge goddamn 'no'.
:'''Sean''': It's not like a gay thing...
:'''Mike''': It's gay and it's not gay. It's like straight, regular guys who get like facelifts and bikini waxes.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Enough. Enough.
:'''Mike''': Male bikini waxes.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Enough! Nobody in this firehouse goes out and goes shoppin' anymore unless it's for underwear or for boots or for a pair of goddamn gloves. And nobody, and I mean nobody, goes and gets a facial unless that means putting water on your face to clean up after catchin' a job. And the word metrosexual from this point on is banned from this quarters. (walks out)
:'''Lou''': What the hell's a male bikini wax?
:'''Sean''': That's when they take the hair off of your scrotom.
:'''Franco''': Ow.
:'''Lou''': ''[in a pained voice]'' Why?
:'''Mike''': Chicks dig it.
:'''Franco''': Chicks dig us shaving our balls?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mike''': ''[about Sean]'' He, uh, got a ball wax.
:'''Franco''': A ball wax?
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Me and this chick that I've been banging, we were talking about it right. And she said that it makes the sex better for women, right? So, there's nothin' on TV last night, so I get look through the yellow pages and I find a place and I do it.
:'''Franco''': So, this place, did you find it under &quot;ball&quot; or &quot;wax?&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': Let me tell you something, okay?
:'''Janet''': Hey, don't you threaten me.
:'''Tommy''': If I want to threaten you, I will! Okay? You start a shit storm about my kids with me, you take 'em anywhere you want, I will hunt you down and I will find you. Four corners of the Earth, I will find you and I will take those kids back. That's not a threat, that's a goddamn promise, bitch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What is it with these gay people? They're everywhere now: sitcoms, movies. You see the thing in the paper about same sex marriage?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Same sex marriages? Hey, right now I'd settle for a &quot;some&quot; sex marriage.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': No, I'll tell ya, brother. I am pro-lesbian. I am a big supporter of the lesbian community.
:'''Jimmy''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, I wish my daughter was a lesbian.
:'''Jimmy''': Which one?
:'''Tommy''': Both. Why don't they have a pill for that?

=== ''Kansas'' [1.03] ===

:'''Sean''': I like hockey, I could never play though. I've got weak ankles.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, that's not the only thing that you got that's weak.
:'''Sean''': What does that mean?
:'''Franco''': Nothing.
:'''Sean''': No, what does that mean?
:'''Franco''': It was a joke, Sean.
:'''Sean''': Well, what're you sayin' then, like I got weak knees?
:'''Franco''': No.
:'''Sean''': Arms? What?
:'''Franco''': I was talking about your mind. I was saying that you've got a weak mind.
:'''Sean''': You know what, Franco, do I piss all over you all of the time? I don't think so. I don't understand why you gotta be such a prick to me.
:'''Lou''': Hey, girls, do I have to separate you?
:'''Sean''': He said that I had a weak mind, Lou.
:'''Lou''': Yeah, like he's pulling that outta thin air.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What is that?
:'''Colleen''': What, the cookies?
:'''Tommy''': No. Below the cookies, peeking out of your pants, and it better not be a tattoo because if it is a tattoo, you're not gonna see the light of day ever again.
:'''Colleen''': It's not like it's huge.
:'''Tommy''': Move the cookies. ''[she moves them]'' Oh my, god. What the hell?
:'''Colleen''': It's a shamrock.
:'''Tommy''': I can see it's a shamrock.
:'''Colleen''': You're always saying that we should be proud of being Irish.
:'''Tommy''': You wanna be proud you're Irish? Wave a flag, march in a parade, have 100 kids ... not yet. Oh my god.
:'''Colleen''': It's not that big of a deal, Mom has a tattoo on her butt.
:'''Tommy''': How do you know that?
:'''Colleen''': She showed me.
:'''Tommy''': She showed you? Jesus Christ. ''[groans]'' I'll tell ya' what, you're gonna get rid of that yourself, or I'm gonna get rid of it for you.
:'''Colleen''': How?
:'''Tommy''': I'm sure Black &amp; Decker has some kind of attachment.
:'''Colleen''': It's ''my'' body. You can't tell me what to do with it.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, really? Let me just remind you of a couple things, okay? When you turn 18 years old, you can move out of this house and you can get a flower tattooed on your ass, and a rainbow tattooed on your tits, but until then as long as you live under my roof, you play by my rules. No tattoos.
:'''Colleen''': I didn't get it while I was living under your roof, I got it while I was living under Mom's.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Phyllis''': You don't need to lie to me, either. What are you doing?
:'''Lou''': Okay... You want the truth?
:'''Phyllis''': Yeah.
:'''Lou''': I've been writing poetry.
:'''Phyllis''': What?
:'''Lou''': Poetry. Since... just after 9/11. It's kind of been, I don't know, my therapy, I guess. I don't know.
:'''Phyllis''': Writing poetry?
:'''Lou''': Yeah.
:'''Phyllis''': Oh my God, why couldn't it have been the porn?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy pays his nephew for sending a computer virus to Roger]''
:'''Tommy''': ''[sighs]'' I could only get 300 bucks out of the ATM.
:'''Damian''': That's okay. You can owe me the rest. I trust you.
:'''Tommy''': You know what, kid? I was at your christening and I didn't drown you, okay? So let's think about who owes who. All right?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': I didn't come here the other night looking for a fight. And I didn't come tonight looking for one either. I came to talk to that Teff guy. Well, he started the fight. He threw the first punch. You saw him do that. And I know a couple other guys in there saw it too.
:'''Vinny''': So?
:'''Chief Reilly''': So, uh... I mean it's possible I... I might need a witness and I was hoping you'd, you know, do the right thing.
:'''Vinny''': You know, funny thing about gay bashers: they're all tough guys until they get caught.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I never--
:'''Vinny''': I saw what every other guy in the place saw. You threw the first punch. 

=== ''DNA'' [1.04] ===

:'''Janet''': ''[at the hospital]'' Tommy, I can't get any answers in there.
:'''Tommy''': You know what? ''[grabs her arm and pushes her against the building, and pins her there]'' Hey, what did I tell you, huh? What did I tell you?
:'''Janet''': Get the hell off of me!
:'''Tommy''': I told you to get your priorities straight, huh. Get your shit together. You wanted to be in charge of the kids, and what happened? She's lying in a hospital bed while you're trying to get laid with you loser goddamn boyfriend! ''[they shove each other and he finally lets her go]''
:'''Janet''': And where have you been?!
:'''Tommy''': Where was I? At work! Paying your goddamn bills!
:'''Janet''': Tommy, this isn't about our bullshit. This is about our little girl in there.
:'''Tommy''': Don't tell me.
:'''Janet''': Goddamn you, Tommy.
:'''Tommy''': It's on ''your'' head!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Mickey''': Tom, I, uh, I don't know what you want me to say.
:'''Tommy''': Mick... I want you to say that it's all... it's bullshit. You know? There is no plan, there is no map. There's no golden ring at the end of the ride. It's just... bullshit. You know? ''[sighs]'' I want you to take away the hope, man, that's the thing that's killing me. You know,it's just... it's like, uh... I'm just hanging here, man. Hope is making me think I can fix my marriage, you know? The day of Jimmy's funeral... you stood up on that altar and you said, &quot;Sometimes we don't know why God does the things that he does.&quot; But I'm telling you... Mick... if he takes my little girl tonight... I'm going to want to know why.
:'''Father Mickey''': That's why you got to hold on to the hope, Tom. 'Cause in the end, that's all we got left.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': You remember that blonde that we met at the Bubble Bar last month? You were with me, right?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, yeah. The one you banged that night?
:'''Tommy''': Actually, I've been banging her ever since, but I don't know her name.
:'''Franco''': Damn. How're you pulling that off?
:'''Tommy''': Well, it's like a late night booty-call. Not a lot of conversation, you know?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, those are the best.
:'''Tommy''': Well, I gotta come up with a name soon, man.
:'''Franco''': Yeah. You know what? You could do that thing where you introduce her to somebody. You say the other person's name but not hers, and then she has to say &quot;Hi, I'm...&quot; Fill in the blank.
:'''Tommy''': Never gonna work.
:'''Franco''': Why not?
:'''Tommy''': Because I never take this chick out in public.
:'''Franco''': Ah, yeah.
:'''Tommy''': See?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, you got yourself a real goddamn dilemma there.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, broads. It's not enough that you're bangin' 'em like crazy, now you gotta know their names.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Wait a minute, you passed on a three way? Was she hot?
:'''Mike''': Way hot.
:'''Lou''': What're you nuts?
:'''Mike''': Lou, I would have to had sex in front of another guy.
:'''Lou''': So block him out.
:'''Mike''': But what if I get hit with friendly fire?
:'''Lou''': Well, make sure you're done first and then get the hell out of the way. Jesus, it's true what they say: Three-ways, like youth, are wasted on the young.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': ''[On the phone, Franco is in a club with two girls by him]'' So, it's, uh, it's Nancy or Lauren, huh? I don't know, man, she didn't look like a Nancy to me. I'd go with Lauren.
:'''Tommy''': I kinda secretly was hoping she was a Nancy.
:'''Franco''': Why's that?
:'''Tommy''': 'Cause Nancy's give better head.
:'''Franco''': Oh, you've researched that?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, basing it on the two Nancy's that I've known.
:'''Franco''': So, uh, you been with a Lauren?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, one.
:'''Franco''': Oh, yeah? And the head was uh...
:'''Tommy''': Look, there's no such thing as bad head, it's just a matter of degrees.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, agreed. ''[to the girls next to him]'' Uh, girls what're you're names?
:'''Heather''': Heather.
:'''Brittney''': Brittney.
:'''Franco''': ''[to Tommy]'' What about Heather and Brittney? Where do those two names fall on the chart?
:'''Tommy''': Heather and Brittney I'd say... top 3.
:'''Franco''': Oh, yeah. It's my night.

=== ''Orphans'' [1.05] ===

:''[Tommy has just read an &quot;anonymous&quot; poem]''
:'''Franco''': Holy shit.
:'''Sean''': Wow.
:'''Lou''': Powerful.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, powerfully bad. It sucks.
:'''Lou''': I don't know, it's not that bad. It rhymes.
:'''Tommy''': Well, so what? My ten-year-old can make stuff rhyme, it doesn't mean he's the next, uh... ''[to Franco]'' Name a poet.
:'''Sean''': [[w:Angie Dickinson|Angie Dickinson]].
:'''Tommy''': Angie Dickinson from Police Woman?
:'''Franco''': Nah, I think you mean [[Emily Dickinson]], that [[Hailee Steinfeld]] show on Apple TV+.
:'''Sean''': Right.
:'''Tommy''': You know who plays Sue?
:'''Franco''': Nah, I jacked off to Ella Hunt once when I was at the movies watching Anna and the Apocalypse.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': By the way, in the future, when you have something you wrote and you want me to read it, just bring it to me. I'll sit down, I'll read it, I'll digest it and I'll give you the most honest assessment that I can.
:'''Lou''': You'd do that?
:'''Tommy''': For you?
:'''Lou''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': No.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': You don't do that, Sean. You don't bang a guy's girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, or his sister without his permission. And I mean crystal-goddamn-clear permission.
:'''Sean''': You haven't even spoken to her, in like, five years.
:'''Franco''': Guys?
:'''Tommy''': You broke the rules.
:'''Lou''': Big time.
:'''Sean''': Wh--? Ho-- How? Explain to me how. ''[Lou interrupts him]'' Let me finish my -- ''[Lou interrupts him again]'' Can I at least-- ''[Lou interrupts him]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, you run into a guy's ex-girlfriend in a bar and feel her up.
:'''Lou''': Yes.
:'''Tommy''': You can be in a bar, meet a guy's ex-wife, and...
:'''Lou''': ''[makes circular gestures on his chest]'' Titty action.
:'''Tommy''': A little bit of titty action. You can even grab guy's sister's ass in a bar that the guy actually happens to be in.
:'''Lou''': Yes, you could.
:'''Tommy''': And it's all explainable under the giant umbrella of the huge, 'Sorry-I-Was-Drunk' rule.
:'''Lou''': Like Visa and Mastercard, accepted the world over and never argued.
:'''Tommy''': Never argued. Which was why the rule was created by the way, by the... Romans?
:'''Lou''': Ah, even earlier than that, my friend: the Druids.
:'''Sean''': Listen, Franco didn't want to have anything to do with her.
:'''Lou''': He just doesn't get it.
:'''Tommy''': ''[counting on his fingers]'': Look, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, sister, half-sister: ''[sweeps his hands]'' No pussy!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Janet, about Colleen]'' Did you even know she was going to the city with the Murphy Kid that night, let alone joyriding around Manhattan with him? And I'll bet my left nut that that kid's on drugs. Did you hear what I said? I said my left nut, which just happens to be my favorite nut.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Guy''': Are you Tommy Gavin?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, who's askin'?
:'''Guy''': We're Roger's friends.
:'''Tommy''': Well, that's your problem, not mine. ''[the three guys form a circle around him]'' What? What are you guys gonna do? Audit me? ''[they beat him up]''

=== ''Revenge'' [1.06] ===

:'''Lou''': How many were there?
:'''Tommy''': Three. They got me outside the bar.
:'''Lou''': Did they do any damage?
:'''Tommy''': Come on. They work on Wall Street the worst they can give me is a paper cut. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': I'll take the high road.
:'''Lou''': Huh. You?
:'''Tommy''': Okay, maybe not the high road but certainly not the lowest road.
:'''Lou''': Which is where you normally travel.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you kiddin' me? I drew up the original maps.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After they bet Sean that he couldn't get to first base and he did with a transvestite, although he doesn't know that she is one]''
:'''Tommy''': Well, the thing is uh, we uh... We wanna go double or nothin'.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Oh, god.
:'''Sean''': Wait, wait, wait. What's the bet?
:'''Tommy''': 80 bucks says you can't close the deal by the weekend.
:'''Sean''': What you mean sleep with her?
:'''Tommy''': Full penetration. Before the weekend.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, I don't know.
:'''Tommy''': Come on. I thought you had game, big shot.
:'''Sean''': I do. I got game. I-- I just don't wanna rush it. It's just something about this girl, she's-- she's different.
:'''Chief Reilly''': No shit.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Oh, God.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. It was somethin' that she was doin' with her mouth. I don't know what it was but it was all...wet. ''[Chief looks like he's gonna puke]'' What's wrong? Are you okay? ''[Chief walks towards the bathroom]''
:'''Tommy''': He had a bad sandwich this afternoon.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Telling the Chief how he found out that the girl he was seeing is a transvestite, he found out when he was getting a blow job]'
:'''Chief Reilly''': Man, you must have freaked out.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, yeah. It was pretty weird but I didn't want to make a big scene so once he was through I told him---
:'''Chief Reilly''': Wait, hold on a second. After he was through? You mean you let him finish the knob job?
:'''Sean''': Well, the guy was givin' me a blow-job, Chief. I didn't wanna be rude.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I'm gonna pretend that I didn't hear that.

=== ''Butterfly'' [1.07] ===

:'''[Janet is drunk and kisses Tommy]''
:'''Tommy''': And what are we doing?
:'''Janet''': We're gonna go upstairs.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, we are?
:'''Janet''': Mm hmm.
:'''Tommy''': Okay. Now, not that I don't wanna go upstairs, but okay, where are we going with this?
:'''Janet''': What, you don't want me?
:'''Tommy''': No, that's not what I said. I did not say that. What --
:'''Janet''': Tommy, we were always at our best ''[kisses him]'' when we were in bed. A million problems everywhere else, but in bed... ''[kisses him]'' Come on.
:'''Tommy''': Alright.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What're you ladies talking about?
:'''Franco''': The firefighter calender. I'm doing it again this year.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, he gets to choose his own month.
:'''Tommy''': Great.
:'''Mike''': So what month are you going for?
:'''Sean''': I'd try for February. Work that whole Valentine's Day thing.
:'''Franco''': Nah, common mistake. Shortest month of the year.
:'''Mike''': So, what's a good month?
:'''Franco''': Well, you definitely don't wanna be December. Nobody pays attention to you until the last 30 days of the year. You wanna be in the first four or five months to maximize booty potential. I'm thinkin' April, May, in there, you know? It's spring. Winter clothes are comin' off. Chicks are thinkin' about gettin' laid.
:'''Mike''': Yeah? Interesting.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, it's a science, and I'm the mad scientist. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Two grand for a porch?
:'''Franco''': Last one we did, we got what, 600 bucks?
:'''Chief''': Who is this guy? The king of chumps?
:'''Tommy''': Nah, some shrink, you know? I figure we get Charlie Walsh's cousin to give us the lumber for what, 300 bones? And we'll divide the rest up. You in?
:'''Lou''': Yeah, for that kind of money, I might show up in a tux.
:'''Tommy''': Franco?
:'''Franco''': In.
:'''Mike''': I'll do it.
:'''Tommy''': Let me tell you something kid: First time doing a porch job, you work for free.
:'''Lou''': Let me clarify further. Not only do you not get paid, you generally do all the work while we sit around drinking beer and shooting the shit.
:'''Tommy''': And you gotta buy the beer.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, a couple of those suitcase things. MGD is good.
:'''Mike''': Guys, I just remembered... I'm busy.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, you're busy helping us queer-bait.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Janet''': Tommy, nothing's changed.
:'''Tommy''': I didn't come over to you last night, you came lookin' for-- and now you're going to tell me that it shouldn't have happened?
:'''Janet''': I was drunk, I was frustrated. I'm tired of being alone.
:'''Tommy''': You're not alone, okay? I live across the street. Which you gladly took advantage of last night.
:'''Janet''': But you don't understand. I need something more-- something that I can't get from you. ''[Tommy makes a face]'' Yes, the sex was great. But the sex is always great with us, Tommy. We've never had a problem connecting on a physical level, but an emotional level--
:'''Tommy''': Oh, Jesus Christ. I knew that was what you were going to say!
:'''Janet''': Hey, I can't do this anymore, I'm tired of being this lonely.
:'''Tommy''': You know what? You're nuts, you should see a shrink because you are--
:'''Janet''': I am sorry.
:'''Tommy''': You're sorry? Bullshit. You come over my house. You lure me into bed, you bang me, you get my hopes up and now you're sorry?
:'''Janet''': I wanted to see if it still worked.
:'''Tommy''': If what worked? My dick?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Hey, I went with Dwight the other night to the city, we caught a show and afterwards I look into this bar and who do I see? Our very own little probie making out with some broad to beat the band.
:'''Tommy''': So...?
:'''Lou''': So... this chick is old enough to be his mother.
:'''Franco''': Oh god, I just caught a chill.
:'''Tommy''': How old?
:'''Lou''': I don't know, I didn't have time to cut her in half and count the rings but she's pretty old, I mean for him. I'm guessin' late 40's.
:'''Sean''': Wow, really?
:'''Lou''': Yeah. ''[Mike walks up]'' Hey, speak of the devil. Hey, kid, your ears burning?
:'''Mike''': Huh?
:'''Tommy''': Hey, are you bangin' some old broad?
:'''Lou''': And if you are, a word of caution: A broken hip takes a very long time to heal.
:'''Mike''': Hey, she's not that old. She's only 46.
:'''Sean''': Well, that's nothin' in dog years.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, which probably applies to her.

=== ''Inches'' [1.08] ===

:'''Chief Reilly''': What're you guys talking about?
:'''Sean''': Nothing.
:'''Lou''': Eight and a smidgen of what?
:'''Mike''': Well, last night I was watchin' TV and there was nothin' on really so I---
:'''Sean''': Cut to the chase.
:'''Mike''': And I got a hard-on and I was lookin' at it and I was thinkin' about jerkin' off and--
:'''Sean''': Would you cut to the chase?
:'''Mike''': Well, there was a ruler on the table and I kinda --
:'''Sean''': He measured his cock.
:'''Chief Reilly''': You measured your cock?
:'''Lou''': And it was eight inches?
:'''Mike''': Well, mine was seven and a half... almost. His was eight.
:'''Sean''': Well, eight and a titch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I was readin' FHM yesterday and they said that the average cock is like six inches long.
:'''Mike''': Yeah we're huge! ''[slaps Sean's hand]''
:'''Sean''': Huge.
:'''Chief''': Whoa, whoa, whoa. Before you two ponies start swingin' your johnson's around, answer one question for me. Did you measure from the top or bottom?
:'''Tommy''': Ooh. A little fly in the ointment.
:'''Chief''': Did you go from the under carriage, from the ball-sac to the tip?
:''[Mike and Sean exchange looks]''
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Yeah, we did.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Well then you might as well have been measuring from the base of your spine because everybody gets at least an inch going the other way. You gotta go from the pubic bone to the tip.
:'''Mike''': Ah, no way, that means I'm only like 6 1/2.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Almost.
:'''Mike''': Shit.
:'''Sean''': I don't know if you're right about that, Chief.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Been there, done this, boys. I got twenty that starts the &quot;biggest dick in the crew&quot; contest. Who wants in?
:'''Mike''': You gonna measure yours?
:'''Chief Reilly''': I haven't seen my feet in ten years let alone my dick.
:'''Tommy''': Chief, I got a question.
:'''Chief Reilly''': And I think I know what that question is Firefighter Gavin.
:'''Tommy''': Really?
:'''Chief''': Girth?
:'''Tommy''': Ha. Exactly.
:'''Sean''': Wait. What? Girth.
:'''Tommy''': Circumference, asshole.
:'''Lou''': That's gonna be a completely different story. I'm gonna double the wager.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': Well, you know uh, Chief. I really don't think this whole measuring from the top thing is really right, I mean who invented that? I mean you lose and inch, it's not really fair.
:'''Chief Reilly''': From the pubic bone to the tip. 'Cause that's all that enters the vagina. From the pubic bone, out to the tip. Done. ''[Sean makes a weird face]'' What?
:'''Sean''': Nothing. I-- just that I would never hear you say the word &quot;vagina.&quot;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Vagina.
:'''Sean''': Stop.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Va-gina.
:'''Sean''': Come on, Chief. Stop.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uncle Teddy''': ''[to the monkey]'' You filthy little son of a bitch. You keep screamin' and I'll stick a banana right up your ass.

=== ''Alarm'' [1.09] ===

:'''Chief Reilly''': Look, guys I wanted to get you together because we have a situation that's arisin...arosen. It's pretty important.
:'''Sean''': It's arisen.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shut up. ''[to Lou]'' Is he right?
:'''Lou''': Amazingly, yes. How?
:'''Sean''': I've been bangin' this chick who plays alotta Scrabble. Hey, did you know that Q-A-T is a word?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shut up.
:'''Sean''': I swear.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I said shut up.
:'''Sean''': Alright. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[about Colleen]'' I'm not exactly over here doin' a jig because she turned into a lezbo.
:'''Janet''': Hey, Tom. She is not a lesbian.
:'''Tommy''': She has a girlfriend.
:'''Janet''': She's 15 years old. She's only had one boyfriend. When she's had to deal with 5 or 6 guys, then I can see her going gay.

=== ''Immortal'' [1.10] ===

:'''Laura''': I know you guys are talkin' about my tits and my ass. Just in case you are wondering, I'm a 34-C cup, my nipples are slightly larger than average and stand up like top-hats when aroused. My ass is tight as a snare drum but still soft to the touch. Any more questions?
:'''Tommy''': Wow. ''[Laura puts Tommy's sandwich on the table]''
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Can I get one of those? ''[points to the sandwich]''
:'''Laura''': No. ''[leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Did she just say top-hats?
:'''Franco''': I believe she did.
:'''Lou''': I've always been a big fan of formal wear.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is pulled over for speeding through a downtown intersection]''
:'''Tommy''': Hey, how you doing? Hey, Collins man!
:'''Collins''': You better have a good excuse, Gavin.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, you know what man, I got a phone call...
:'''Collins''': That was some dare-devil shit back there.
:'''Tommy''': I know, I know. I got a phone call about twenty minutes ago. My mom had a heart attack and I got to get to a hospital.
:'''Collins''': Bullshit.
:'''Tommy''': No bro, I'm serious!
:'''Collins''': Give me your license and reg... All right, the honeymoon's over Gavin, all right? So tell all your friends and all that hero worship you got after 9/11 ain't getting paid any dues anymore. We lost guys downtown too, but nobody even talks about us. 343 firemen. There was almost 100 cops!
:'''Tommy''': That's true. Nobody's forgetting about the cops.
:'''Collins''': Guess what? You so much as look at a cop the wrong way and you're paying the price. All right, asshole?
:'''Tommy''': You know this is going to come back to bite you in the ass. We got a big hockey game coming up again. A rematch-- in what, like a week?
:'''Collins''': Yeah, I'm real concerned about payback. Yeah, I hope your ma don't die while I'm writing you up, either. Have a nice day.
:'''Tommy''': ''[whispers]'' Shithead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': Two fags in a tree.
:'''Lou''': It's a tree-some!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Where's Elvis?
:'''Tommy''': What?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Isn't this heaven?
:'''Tommy''': No, it's my garage.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Goddamn it! I'm alive. Shit!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy throws money into the air]''
:'''Tommy''': I think you asked for what? Four grand? There's about six or seven here.
:'''Janet''': Where did you get it, Tom?
:'''Tommy''': The harder I work, the luckier I goddamned get. 
 
=== ''Mom'' [1.11] ===

:'''Tommy''': ''[to Laura]'' Let me tell you something, sister, you serve two purposes in this house-- you can give me a blow job or make me a sandwich. I'm not in the mood for head and I had a late breakfast, so you're shit out of luck.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I'm tellin' ya brother. Havin' your picture in this calendar is like having a license to mint pussy.
:'''Lou''': &quot;Mint pussy.&quot; May be one of the worst Ben &amp; Jerry flavors of all time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[About Sean's picture in the Fireman's calendar]'' You look like the Marlboro Man.
:'''Sean''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. If the Marlboro Man smoked cock instead of cigarettes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': Did you go outside like that?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Like what?
:'''Tommy''': Like that. With your joint hangin' out.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Hey, you got issues with the human body, that's your problem. That's your shame-based religious upbringing rearing its ugly head.
:'''Tommy''': Speakin' of ugly heads.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Don't lay your issues on me. I got no problem being naked.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, yeah? Why don't you go upstairs and look in the mirror? I think there's more than one problem goin' on down there.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After they found out they were cheating on each other]''
:'''Lou''': Are you gonna stop seein' him?
:'''Phyllis''': Are you gonna stop seein' her?
:'''Lou''': Who is this guy?
:'''Phyllis''': Who's the girl?
:'''Lou''': Do I know 'em?
:'''Phyllis''': Do I know her?
:'''Lou''': You know what? Maybe, maybe we shouldn't be asking questions right now.
:'''Phyllis''': Maybe not.
:'''Lou''': You know what? Lemme just say this, okay? If you told me, what you told me and I didn't have somethin' goin' on the side, I would have been so goddamn pissed you wouldn't even believe.
:'''Phyllis''': Well, you know, I'd be pissed too.

=== ''Leaving'' [1.12] ===

:''[Tommy's kitchen is a total mess]''
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Hey, Tom. I made chili.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, no shit. What did 'ya do, mix it with a goddamn shotgun?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Shelia wants to tell something to Tommy but she won't tell him over the phone]''
:'''Tommy''': It's gonna drive me crazy, not that you don't have a lock on that particular skill, right now.
:'''Shelia''': Why do you have to be such an asshole?
:'''Tommy''': Practice.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[A guy was impaled by a tree branch from a rooftop garden]''
:'''Lou''': Maybe we should uh, go up and talk to the tree. I mean, it looks like an accident but you never know.
:'''Tommy''': Well, there might be a couple of scrubs up there that saw somethin'. I say we go up, uproot the whole goddamn garden and bring it in for questioning.
:'''Lou''': You know, just 'cause it's vegetation it thinks it can get away with this shit.
:'''Tommy''': Shameful.
:'''Lou''': It really is.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Janet, who wants more money]'' Yeah, lemme pull down my pants and grab the money that's growin' outta my ass.

=== ''Sanctuary'' [1.13] ===

:''[The whole crew is looking at the NYC skyline]''
:'''Sean''': It's a nice view, huh?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. It'll never be the same for me.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, me either.
:'''Laura''': Even when they put up whatever it is that they're puttin' up.
:'''Franco''': It's like they're tryin' to erase what happened. You know?
:'''Chief Reilly''': It's insulting. Remember when they had those spotlights right after 9/11? I couldn't take that. I like it like this... empty. Just the way those scumbags left it. No spotlights, no new buildings, just empty.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. That's the thing about the spotlight, you know. Walk out into it and at first everybody thinks they see a good-lookin' all-American hero. But then you stay out there long enough and you know, they start to notice certain things. Maybe your nose is a little crooked, you know, maybe your teeth are too crooked. Maybe you got a little scar on your upper lip. Your hair's not right. One eye's bigger than the other. Next thing 'ya know they think they're lookin' at some kinda goddamn monster. Like they're lookin' at King Kong. Then they start throwin' shit at 'ya.
:'''Lou''': Well, I'll tell ya one thing. That morning they threw a couple a jets into a couple a buildings. And they threw at us the biggest job in the history of our profession. And what do we do? We gave up 343 of our guys to save... at least 10,000.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. And look at us now: Three years later and still waitin' for a goddamn raise. I'll tell 'ya what guys, we were on our own that morning and we're still on our own today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Mickey told Franco that Tommy was seeing Shelia]''
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Mickey, in confession]'' Bless me father for I have sinned, and so have you. ''[he grabs him and starts beating him up]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sean is dating a girl who's a really bad kisser]''
:'''Chief Reilly''': Now, you're talkin' about bad kissin'. Are you talkin' about too much saliva bad kissin'? Or using your tongue like an iguana eatin' a fly bad kissin'? ''[Sean and Franco give him a look]'' Hey, I used to be a player.
:'''Franco''': That was disturbing, Chief.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. And disgusting.
:'''Chief Reilly''': You shoulda saw the chick that I did it with.

[[Category:Rescue Me seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>rb5pb9actuag2zda5wl8vzhpwdybt5m</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965096</id>
      <parentid>3965095</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:03:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>HazelEyedKiki</username>
        <id>839297</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965096</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="37147" sha1="ralqmh6pesyl1g803qrvzxei4veg7as" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Rescue Me (season 1)|1]] [[Rescue Me (season 2)|2]] [[Rescue Me (season 3)|3]] [[Rescue Me (season 4)|4]] [[Rescue Me (season 5)|5]] [[Rescue Me (season 6)|6]] [[Rescue Me (season 7)|7]] | [[Rescue Me (American TV series)|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Rescue Me (American TV series)|Rescue Me]]''''' (2004–2011) is an American comedy-drama TV series, airing on [[w:FX (TV channel)|FX]], about the professional and personal lives of [[w:New York City|New York City]] [[w:Firefighter|firefighters]] after the trauma of the [[w:September 11, 2001 attacks|September 11]].

=== ''Guts'' [1.01] ===

:'''Tommy''': You want to know how big my balls are? My balls are bigger than two of your heads duct-taped together. I've been in the middle of shit that would make you piss your pants right now. Uptown, downtown, Harlem, Brooklyn. But there ain't no medals on my chest, assholes, 'cause I ain't no hero. I'm a fireman. We're not in the business of making heroes here. We're in the business of discovering cowards, 'cause that's what you are if you can't take the heat. You're a pussy, and there ain't no room for pussies in the FDNY. ''[to a snickering recruit in the first row]'' What are you laughing at, shithead? Huh? What's so god damn funny?
:'''Recruit''': I just... .
:'''Tommy''': Shut up! You speak when spoken to. You pussies better pray you don't get assigned to my firehouse. Because I have seen it all. I knew sixty men who gave their lives at Ground Zero. Sixty. Four of them from my house. Vito Castella... found him almost whole. Ricky Davis... found him almost whole, hugging a civilian woman. Bobby Vincent... found his head. And my cousin, Jimmy Keefe, my best friend. You know what they found of him? What I was able to bring back and give to his parents? A finger. That's all. A finger. These four men were better human beings and better firefighters than any of you will ever be.
:'''Firefighting Class Instructor''': Say &quot;thank you,&quot; firefighting upper class!
:'''Firefighting Upper Class''': Thank you, Firefighter Gavin, sir!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After everyone gets up and leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, Doc...
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Oh, you don't need to explain, I was at another firehouse last night and the reaction was quite similar.
:'''Tommy''': The guys, uh, they're not gonna talk to a psychotherapist in the firehouse, especially not uh, female one.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': What about the female firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': We don't have any female firefighters in this house.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are you threatened by women?
:'''Tommy''': No.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': You-- you don't seem to think that a woman can be a firefighter.
:'''Tommy''': I'll tell you what, it's not about being a man or a woman, okay? It's about doing the job. It's about me getting home safe and sound in the morning to see my kids, okay? So, you got a woman who can do the job better than the guys on my crew? Bring her on. You know? You got a martian, or a cyborg, or a Chinaman that can do the job, bring them on too.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are there any Chinese firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, probably. Somewhere in... China.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': I'm sensing a lot of hostility.
:'''Tommy''': You are very, very perceptive.
:''Dr. Goldberg''': That's what they tell me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is laying money out on the table]''
:'''Tommy''': Alright, we're going to play a little game because Daddy needs to know some information on Mommy's new boyfriend. Alright? 
:''[they all are silent]''
:'''Katy''': But Mommy doesn't want us to talk about that.
:'''Tommy''': I understand that, sweetheart. That's why we have the money.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': We have sex with woman who ain't our wives and we make every detail available to the other guys.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, well, maybe I'm a gentleman.
:'''Chief''': Yeah, and I'm growing tits.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you should check a mirror, pal.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jimmy''': All right, hold on, hold on, hold on. Let's review. Why are you two separated?
:'''Tommy''': According to her?
:'''Jimmy''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': You know, I... she says I couldn't open up, I wasn't emotionally available, blah, blah, blah.

=== ''Gay'' [1.02] ===

:''[Talking about a fireman who retired and them came out of the closet, and also claims to know more gay firemen]''
:'''Sean''': Well, maybe he just thought they were gay because they were well-groomed, and uh, into fashion. You know what I mean?
:'''Chief Reilly, Franco, Lou, and Tommy''': No.
:'''Sean''': Well, maybe they weren't homosexuals. Maybe they were metrosexuals.
:'''Lou''': What?
:'''Tommy''': My daughter used that term last week.
:'''Franco''': The teenager?
:'''Tommy''': The eight-year-old.
:'''Chief Reilly''': What in the sweet chocolate christ is a metrosexual?
:'''Mike''': It means that you aren't gay but you like to do certain things that might be considered gay. ''[they all stare at him, looking totally clueless and in shock]'' Right?
:'''Sean''': No, asshole. He doesn't know what the hell he's talkin' about. Look, a metrosexual is like a straight guy who happens to you know, also like to go shoppin' and-- and get facials and stuff.
:'''Tommy''': Holy shit.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shoppin' for food?
:'''Mike''': Nice food.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, and wine, and... clothes. Yeah, I'm not explaining it right. Franco you know what a metrosexual is, right?
:'''Franco''': Uh, that would be a huge goddamn 'no'.
:'''Sean''': It's not like a gay thing...
:'''Mike''': It's gay and it's not gay. It's like straight, regular guys who get like facelifts and bikini waxes.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Enough. Enough.
:'''Mike''': Male bikini waxes.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Enough! Nobody in this firehouse goes out and goes shoppin' anymore unless it's for underwear or for boots or for a pair of goddamn gloves. And nobody, and I mean nobody, goes and gets a facial unless that means putting water on your face to clean up after catchin' a job. And the word metrosexual from this point on is banned from this quarters. (walks out)
:'''Lou''': What the hell's a male bikini wax?
:'''Sean''': That's when they take the hair off of your scrotom.
:'''Franco''': Ow.
:'''Lou''': ''[in a pained voice]'' Why?
:'''Mike''': Chicks dig it.
:'''Franco''': Chicks dig us shaving our balls?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mike''': ''[about Sean]'' He, uh, got a ball wax.
:'''Franco''': A ball wax?
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Me and this chick that I've been banging, we were talking about it right. And she said that it makes the sex better for women, right? So, there's nothin' on TV last night, so I get look through the yellow pages and I find a place and I do it.
:'''Franco''': So, this place, did you find it under &quot;ball&quot; or &quot;wax?&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': Let me tell you something, okay?
:'''Janet''': Hey, don't you threaten me.
:'''Tommy''': If I want to threaten you, I will! Okay? You start a shit storm about my kids with me, you take 'em anywhere you want, I will hunt you down and I will find you. Four corners of the Earth, I will find you and I will take those kids back. That's not a threat, that's a goddamn promise, bitch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What is it with these gay people? They're everywhere now: sitcoms, movies. You see the thing in the paper about same sex marriage?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Same sex marriages? Hey, right now I'd settle for a &quot;some&quot; sex marriage.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': No, I'll tell ya, brother. I am pro-lesbian. I am a big supporter of the lesbian community.
:'''Jimmy''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, I wish my daughter was a lesbian.
:'''Jimmy''': Which one?
:'''Tommy''': Both. Why don't they have a pill for that?

=== ''Kansas'' [1.03] ===

:'''Sean''': I like hockey, I could never play though. I've got weak ankles.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, that's not the only thing that you got that's weak.
:'''Sean''': What does that mean?
:'''Franco''': Nothing.
:'''Sean''': No, what does that mean?
:'''Franco''': It was a joke, Sean.
:'''Sean''': Well, what're you sayin' then, like I got weak knees?
:'''Franco''': No.
:'''Sean''': Arms? What?
:'''Franco''': I was talking about your mind. I was saying that you've got a weak mind.
:'''Sean''': You know what, Franco, do I piss all over you all of the time? I don't think so. I don't understand why you gotta be such a prick to me.
:'''Lou''': Hey, girls, do I have to separate you?
:'''Sean''': He said that I had a weak mind, Lou.
:'''Lou''': Yeah, like he's pulling that outta thin air.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What is that?
:'''Colleen''': What, the cookies?
:'''Tommy''': No. Below the cookies, peeking out of your pants, and it better not be a tattoo because if it is a tattoo, you're not gonna see the light of day ever again.
:'''Colleen''': It's not like it's huge.
:'''Tommy''': Move the cookies. ''[she moves them]'' Oh my, god. What the hell?
:'''Colleen''': It's a shamrock.
:'''Tommy''': I can see it's a shamrock.
:'''Colleen''': You're always saying that we should be proud of being Irish.
:'''Tommy''': You wanna be proud you're Irish? Wave a flag, march in a parade, have 100 kids ... not yet. Oh my god.
:'''Colleen''': It's not that big of a deal, Mom has a tattoo on her butt.
:'''Tommy''': How do you know that?
:'''Colleen''': She showed me.
:'''Tommy''': She showed you? Jesus Christ. ''[groans]'' I'll tell ya' what, you're gonna get rid of that yourself, or I'm gonna get rid of it for you.
:'''Colleen''': How?
:'''Tommy''': I'm sure Black &amp; Decker has some kind of attachment.
:'''Colleen''': It's ''my'' body. You can't tell me what to do with it.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, really? Let me just remind you of a couple things, okay? When you turn 18 years old, you can move out of this house and you can get a flower tattooed on your ass, and a rainbow tattooed on your tits, but until then as long as you live under my roof, you play by my rules. No tattoos.
:'''Colleen''': I didn't get it while I was living under your roof, I got it while I was living under Mom's.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Phyllis''': You don't need to lie to me, either. What are you doing?
:'''Lou''': Okay... You want the truth?
:'''Phyllis''': Yeah.
:'''Lou''': I've been writing poetry.
:'''Phyllis''': What?
:'''Lou''': Poetry. Since... just after 9/11. It's kind of been, I don't know, my therapy, I guess. I don't know.
:'''Phyllis''': Writing poetry?
:'''Lou''': Yeah.
:'''Phyllis''': Oh my God, why couldn't it have been the porn?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy pays his nephew for sending a computer virus to Roger]''
:'''Tommy''': ''[sighs]'' I could only get 300 bucks out of the ATM.
:'''Damian''': That's okay. You can owe me the rest. I trust you.
:'''Tommy''': You know what, kid? I was at your christening and I didn't drown you, okay? So let's think about who owes who. All right?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': I didn't come here the other night looking for a fight. And I didn't come tonight looking for one either. I came to talk to that Teff guy. Well, he started the fight. He threw the first punch. You saw him do that. And I know a couple other guys in there saw it too.
:'''Vinny''': So?
:'''Chief Reilly''': So, uh... I mean it's possible I... I might need a witness and I was hoping you'd, you know, do the right thing.
:'''Vinny''': You know, funny thing about gay bashers: they're all tough guys until they get caught.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I never--
:'''Vinny''': I saw what every other guy in the place saw. You threw the first punch. 

=== ''DNA'' [1.04] ===

:'''Janet''': ''[at the hospital]'' Tommy, I can't get any answers in there.
:'''Tommy''': You know what? ''[grabs her arm and pushes her against the building, and pins her there]'' Hey, what did I tell you, huh? What did I tell you?
:'''Janet''': Get the hell off of me!
:'''Tommy''': I told you to get your priorities straight, huh. Get your shit together. You wanted to be in charge of the kids, and what happened? She's lying in a hospital bed while you're trying to get laid with you loser goddamn boyfriend! ''[they shove each other and he finally lets her go]''
:'''Janet''': And where have you been?!
:'''Tommy''': Where was I? At work! Paying your goddamn bills!
:'''Janet''': Tommy, this isn't about our bullshit. This is about our little girl in there.
:'''Tommy''': Don't tell me.
:'''Janet''': Goddamn you, Tommy.
:'''Tommy''': It's on ''your'' head!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Mickey''': Tom, I, uh, I don't know what you want me to say.
:'''Tommy''': Mick... I want you to say that it's all... it's bullshit. You know? There is no plan, there is no map. There's no golden ring at the end of the ride. It's just... bullshit. You know? ''[sighs]'' I want you to take away the hope, man, that's the thing that's killing me. You know,it's just... it's like, uh... I'm just hanging here, man. Hope is making me think I can fix my marriage, you know? The day of Jimmy's funeral... you stood up on that altar and you said, &quot;Sometimes we don't know why God does the things that he does.&quot; But I'm telling you... Mick... if he takes my little girl tonight... I'm going to want to know why.
:'''Father Mickey''': That's why you got to hold on to the hope, Tom. 'Cause in the end, that's all we got left.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': You remember that blonde that we met at the Bubble Bar last month? You were with me, right?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, yeah. The one you banged that night?
:'''Tommy''': Actually, I've been banging her ever since, but I don't know her name.
:'''Franco''': Damn. How're you pulling that off?
:'''Tommy''': Well, it's like a late night booty-call. Not a lot of conversation, you know?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, those are the best.
:'''Tommy''': Well, I gotta come up with a name soon, man.
:'''Franco''': Yeah. You know what? You could do that thing where you introduce her to somebody. You say the other person's name but not hers, and then she has to say &quot;Hi, I'm...&quot; Fill in the blank.
:'''Tommy''': Never gonna work.
:'''Franco''': Why not?
:'''Tommy''': Because I never take this chick out in public.
:'''Franco''': Ah, yeah.
:'''Tommy''': See?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, you got yourself a real goddamn dilemma there.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, broads. It's not enough that you're bangin' 'em like crazy, now you gotta know their names.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Wait a minute, you passed on a three way? Was she hot?
:'''Mike''': Way hot.
:'''Lou''': What're you nuts?
:'''Mike''': Lou, I would have to had sex in front of another guy.
:'''Lou''': So block him out.
:'''Mike''': But what if I get hit with friendly fire?
:'''Lou''': Well, make sure you're done first and then get the hell out of the way. Jesus, it's true what they say: Three-ways, like youth, are wasted on the young.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': ''[On the phone, Franco is in a club with two girls by him]'' So, it's, uh, it's Nancy or Lauren, huh? I don't know, man, she didn't look like a Nancy to me. I'd go with Lauren.
:'''Tommy''': I kinda secretly was hoping she was a Nancy.
:'''Franco''': Why's that?
:'''Tommy''': 'Cause Nancy's give better head.
:'''Franco''': Oh, you've researched that?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, basing it on the two Nancy's that I've known.
:'''Franco''': So, uh, you been with a Lauren?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, one.
:'''Franco''': Oh, yeah? And the head was uh...
:'''Tommy''': Look, there's no such thing as bad head, it's just a matter of degrees.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, agreed. ''[to the girls next to him]'' Uh, girls what're you're names?
:'''Heather''': Heather.
:'''Brittney''': Brittney.
:'''Franco''': ''[to Tommy]'' What about Heather and Brittney? Where do those two names fall on the chart?
:'''Tommy''': Heather and Brittney I'd say... top 3.
:'''Franco''': Oh, yeah. It's my night.

=== ''Orphans'' [1.05] ===

:''[Tommy has just read an &quot;anonymous&quot; poem]''
:'''Franco''': Holy shit.
:'''Sean''': Wow.
:'''Lou''': Powerful.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, powerfully bad. It sucks.
:'''Lou''': I don't know, it's not that bad. It rhymes.
:'''Tommy''': Well, so what? My ten-year-old can make stuff rhyme, it doesn't mean he's the next, uh... ''[to Franco]'' Name a poet.
:'''Sean''': [[w:Angie Dickinson|Angie Dickinson]].
:'''Tommy''': Angie Dickinson from Police Woman?
:'''Franco''': Nah, I think you mean [[Emily Dickinson]], that [[Hailee Steinfeld]] show on Apple TV+.
:'''Sean''': Right.
:'''Tommy''': You know who plays Sue?
:'''Franco''': Nah, I jacked off to Ella Hunt once when I was at the movies watching Anna and the Apocalypse.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': By the way, in the future, when you have something you wrote and you want me to read it, just bring it to me. I'll sit down, I'll read it, I'll digest it and I'll give you the most honest assessment that I can.
:'''Lou''': You'd do that?
:'''Tommy''': For you?
:'''Lou''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': No.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': You don't do that, Sean. You don't bang a guy's girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, or his sister without his permission. And I mean crystal-goddamn-clear permission.
:'''Sean''': You haven't even spoken to her, in like, five years.
:'''Franco''': Guys?
:'''Tommy''': You broke the rules.
:'''Lou''': Big time.
:'''Sean''': Wh--? Ho-- How? Explain to me how. ''[Lou interrupts him]'' Let me finish my -- ''[Lou interrupts him again]'' Can I at least-- ''[Lou interrupts him]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, you run into a guy's ex-girlfriend in a bar and feel her up.
:'''Lou''': Yes.
:'''Tommy''': You can be in a bar, meet a guy's ex-wife, and...
:'''Lou''': ''[makes circular gestures on his chest]'' Titty action.
:'''Tommy''': A little bit of titty action. You can even grab guy's sister's ass in a bar that the guy actually happens to be in.
:'''Lou''': Yes, you could.
:'''Tommy''': And it's all explainable under the giant umbrella of the huge, 'Sorry-I-Was-Drunk' rule.
:'''Lou''': Like Visa and Mastercard, accepted the world over and never argued.
:'''Tommy''': Never argued. Which was why the rule was created by the way, by the... Romans?
:'''Lou''': Ah, even earlier than that, my friend: the Druids.
:'''Sean''': Listen, Franco didn't want to have anything to do with her.
:'''Lou''': He just doesn't get it.
:'''Tommy''': ''[counting on his fingers]'': Look, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, sister, half-sister: ''[sweeps his hands]'' No pussy!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Janet, about Colleen]'' Did you even know she was going to the city with the Murphy Kid that night, let alone joyriding around Manhattan with him? And I'll bet my left nut that that kid's on drugs. Did you hear what I said? I said my left nut, which just happens to be my favorite nut.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Guy''': Are you Tommy Gavin?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, who's askin'?
:'''Guy''': We're Roger's friends.
:'''Tommy''': Well, that's your problem, not mine. ''[the three guys form a circle around him]'' What? What are you guys gonna do? Audit me? ''[they beat him up]''

=== ''Revenge'' [1.06] ===

:'''Lou''': How many were there?
:'''Tommy''': Three. They got me outside the bar.
:'''Lou''': Did they do any damage?
:'''Tommy''': Come on. They work on Wall Street the worst they can give me is a paper cut. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': I'll take the high road.
:'''Lou''': Huh. You?
:'''Tommy''': Okay, maybe not the high road but certainly not the lowest road.
:'''Lou''': Which is where you normally travel.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you kiddin' me? I drew up the original maps.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After they bet Sean that he couldn't get to first base and he did with a transvestite, although he doesn't know that she is one]''
:'''Tommy''': Well, the thing is uh, we uh... We wanna go double or nothin'.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Oh, god.
:'''Sean''': Wait, wait, wait. What's the bet?
:'''Tommy''': 80 bucks says you can't close the deal by the weekend.
:'''Sean''': What you mean sleep with her?
:'''Tommy''': Full penetration. Before the weekend.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, I don't know.
:'''Tommy''': Come on. I thought you had game, big shot.
:'''Sean''': I do. I got game. I-- I just don't wanna rush it. It's just something about this girl, she's-- she's different.
:'''Chief Reilly''': No shit.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Oh, God.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. It was somethin' that she was doin' with her mouth. I don't know what it was but it was all...wet. ''[Chief looks like he's gonna puke]'' What's wrong? Are you okay? ''[Chief walks towards the bathroom]''
:'''Tommy''': He had a bad sandwich this afternoon.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Telling the Chief how he found out that the girl he was seeing is a transvestite, he found out when he was getting a blow job]'
:'''Chief Reilly''': Man, you must have freaked out.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, yeah. It was pretty weird but I didn't want to make a big scene so once he was through I told him---
:'''Chief Reilly''': Wait, hold on a second. After he was through? You mean you let him finish the knob job?
:'''Sean''': Well, the guy was givin' me a blow-job, Chief. I didn't wanna be rude.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I'm gonna pretend that I didn't hear that.

=== ''Butterfly'' [1.07] ===

:'''[Janet is drunk and kisses Tommy]''
:'''Tommy''': And what are we doing?
:'''Janet''': We're gonna go upstairs.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, we are?
:'''Janet''': Mm hmm.
:'''Tommy''': Okay. Now, not that I don't wanna go upstairs, but okay, where are we going with this?
:'''Janet''': What, you don't want me?
:'''Tommy''': No, that's not what I said. I did not say that. What --
:'''Janet''': Tommy, we were always at our best ''[kisses him]'' when we were in bed. A million problems everywhere else, but in bed... ''[kisses him]'' Come on.
:'''Tommy''': Alright.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What're you ladies talking about?
:'''Franco''': The firefighter calender. I'm doing it again this year.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, he gets to choose his own month.
:'''Tommy''': Great.
:'''Mike''': So what month are you going for?
:'''Sean''': I'd try for February. Work that whole Valentine's Day thing.
:'''Franco''': Nah, common mistake. Shortest month of the year.
:'''Mike''': So, what's a good month?
:'''Franco''': Well, you definitely don't wanna be December. Nobody pays attention to you until the last 30 days of the year. You wanna be in the first four or five months to maximize booty potential. I'm thinkin' April, May, in there, you know? It's spring. Winter clothes are comin' off. Chicks are thinkin' about gettin' laid.
:'''Mike''': Yeah? Interesting.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, it's a science, and I'm the mad scientist. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Two grand for a porch?
:'''Franco''': Last one we did, we got what, 600 bucks?
:'''Chief''': Who is this guy? The king of chumps?
:'''Tommy''': Nah, some shrink, you know? I figure we get Charlie Walsh's cousin to give us the lumber for what, 300 bones? And we'll divide the rest up. You in?
:'''Lou''': Yeah, for that kind of money, I might show up in a tux.
:'''Tommy''': Franco?
:'''Franco''': In.
:'''Mike''': I'll do it.
:'''Tommy''': Let me tell you something kid: First time doing a porch job, you work for free.
:'''Lou''': Let me clarify further. Not only do you not get paid, you generally do all the work while we sit around drinking beer and shooting the shit.
:'''Tommy''': And you gotta buy the beer.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, a couple of those suitcase things. MGD is good.
:'''Mike''': Guys, I just remembered... I'm busy.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, you're busy helping us queer-bait.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Janet''': Tommy, nothing's changed.
:'''Tommy''': I didn't come over to you last night, you came lookin' for-- and now you're going to tell me that it shouldn't have happened?
:'''Janet''': I was drunk, I was frustrated. I'm tired of being alone.
:'''Tommy''': You're not alone, okay? I live across the street. Which you gladly took advantage of last night.
:'''Janet''': But you don't understand. I need something more-- something that I can't get from you. ''[Tommy makes a face]'' Yes, the sex was great. But the sex is always great with us, Tommy. We've never had a problem connecting on a physical level, but an emotional level--
:'''Tommy''': Oh, Jesus Christ. I knew that was what you were going to say!
:'''Janet''': Hey, I can't do this anymore, I'm tired of being this lonely.
:'''Tommy''': You know what? You're nuts, you should see a shrink because you are--
:'''Janet''': I am sorry.
:'''Tommy''': You're sorry? Bullshit. You come over my house. You lure me into bed, you bang me, you get my hopes up and now you're sorry?
:'''Janet''': I wanted to see if it still worked.
:'''Tommy''': If what worked? My dick?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Hey, I went with Dwight the other night to the city, we caught a show and afterwards I look into this bar and who do I see? Our very own little probie making out with some broad to beat the band.
:'''Tommy''': So...?
:'''Lou''': So... this chick is old enough to be his mother.
:'''Franco''': Oh god, I just caught a chill.
:'''Tommy''': How old?
:'''Lou''': I don't know, I didn't have time to cut her in half and count the rings but she's pretty old, I mean for him. I'm guessin' late 40's.
:'''Sean''': Wow, really?
:'''Lou''': Yeah. ''[Mike walks up]'' Hey, speak of the devil. Hey, kid, your ears burning?
:'''Mike''': Huh?
:'''Tommy''': Hey, are you bangin' some old broad?
:'''Lou''': And if you are, a word of caution: A broken hip takes a very long time to heal.
:'''Mike''': Hey, she's not that old. She's only 46.
:'''Sean''': Well, that's nothin' in dog years.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, which probably applies to her.

=== ''Inches'' [1.08] ===

:'''Chief Reilly''': What're you guys talking about?
:'''Sean''': Nothing.
:'''Lou''': Eight and a smidgen of what?
:'''Mike''': Well, last night I was watchin' TV and there was nothin' on really so I---
:'''Sean''': Cut to the chase.
:'''Mike''': And I got a hard-on and I was lookin' at it and I was thinkin' about jerkin' off and--
:'''Sean''': Would you cut to the chase?
:'''Mike''': Well, there was a ruler on the table and I kinda --
:'''Sean''': He measured his cock.
:'''Chief Reilly''': You measured your cock?
:'''Lou''': And it was eight inches?
:'''Mike''': Well, mine was seven and a half... almost. His was eight.
:'''Sean''': Well, eight and a titch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I was readin' FHM yesterday and they said that the average cock is like six inches long.
:'''Mike''': Yeah we're huge! ''[slaps Sean's hand]''
:'''Sean''': Huge.
:'''Chief''': Whoa, whoa, whoa. Before you two ponies start swingin' your johnson's around, answer one question for me. Did you measure from the top or bottom?
:'''Tommy''': Ooh. A little fly in the ointment.
:'''Chief''': Did you go from the under carriage, from the ball-sac to the tip?
:''[Mike and Sean exchange looks]''
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Yeah, we did.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Well then you might as well have been measuring from the base of your spine because everybody gets at least an inch going the other way. You gotta go from the pubic bone to the tip.
:'''Mike''': Ah, no way, that means I'm only like 6 1/2.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Almost.
:'''Mike''': Shit.
:'''Sean''': I don't know if you're right about that, Chief.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Been there, done this, boys. I got twenty that starts the &quot;biggest dick in the crew&quot; contest. Who wants in?
:'''Mike''': You gonna measure yours?
:'''Chief Reilly''': I haven't seen my feet in ten years let alone my dick.
:'''Tommy''': Chief, I got a question.
:'''Chief Reilly''': And I think I know what that question is Firefighter Gavin.
:'''Tommy''': Really?
:'''Chief''': Girth?
:'''Tommy''': Ha. Exactly.
:'''Sean''': Wait. What? Girth.
:'''Tommy''': Circumference, asshole.
:'''Lou''': That's gonna be a completely different story. I'm gonna double the wager.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': Well, you know uh, Chief. I really don't think this whole measuring from the top thing is really right, I mean who invented that? I mean you lose and inch, it's not really fair.
:'''Chief Reilly''': From the pubic bone to the tip. 'Cause that's all that enters the vagina. From the pubic bone, out to the tip. Done. ''[Sean makes a weird face]'' What?
:'''Sean''': Nothing. I-- just that I would never hear you say the word &quot;vagina.&quot;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Vagina.
:'''Sean''': Stop.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Va-gina.
:'''Sean''': Come on, Chief. Stop.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uncle Teddy''': ''[to the monkey]'' You filthy little son of a bitch. You keep screamin' and I'll stick a banana right up your ass.

=== ''Alarm'' [1.09] ===

:'''Chief Reilly''': Look, guys I wanted to get you together because we have a situation that's arisin...arosen. It's pretty important.
:'''Sean''': It's arisen.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shut up. ''[to Lou]'' Is he right?
:'''Lou''': Amazingly, yes. How?
:'''Sean''': I've been bangin' this chick who plays alotta Scrabble. Hey, did you know that Q-A-T is a word?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shut up.
:'''Sean''': I swear.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I said shut up.
:'''Sean''': Alright. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[about Colleen]'' I'm not exactly over here doin' a jig because she turned into a lezbo.
:'''Janet''': Hey, Tom. She is not a lesbian.
:'''Tommy''': She has a girlfriend.
:'''Janet''': She's 15 years old. She's only had one boyfriend. When she's had to deal with 5 or 6 guys, then I can see her going gay.

=== ''Immortal'' [1.10] ===

:'''Laura''': I know you guys are talkin' about my tits and my ass. Just in case you are wondering, I'm a 34-C cup, my nipples are slightly larger than average and stand up like top-hats when aroused. My ass is tight as a snare drum but still soft to the touch. Any more questions?
:'''Tommy''': Wow. ''[Laura puts Tommy's sandwich on the table]''
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Can I get one of those? ''[points to the sandwich]''
:'''Laura''': No. ''[leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Did she just say top-hats?
:'''Franco''': I believe she did.
:'''Lou''': I've always been a big fan of formal wear.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is pulled over for speeding through a downtown intersection]''
:'''Tommy''': Hey, how you doing? Hey, Collins man!
:'''Collins''': You better have a good excuse, Gavin.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, you know what man, I got a phone call...
:'''Collins''': That was some dare-devil shit back there.
:'''Tommy''': I know, I know. I got a phone call about twenty minutes ago. My mom had a heart attack and I got to get to a hospital.
:'''Collins''': Bullshit.
:'''Tommy''': No bro, I'm serious!
:'''Collins''': Give me your license and reg... All right, the honeymoon's over Gavin, all right? So tell all your friends and all that hero worship you got after 9/11 ain't getting paid any dues anymore. We lost guys downtown too, but nobody even talks about us. 343 firemen. There was almost 100 cops!
:'''Tommy''': That's true. Nobody's forgetting about the cops.
:'''Collins''': Guess what? You so much as look at a cop the wrong way and you're paying the price. All right, asshole?
:'''Tommy''': You know this is going to come back to bite you in the ass. We got a big hockey game coming up again. A rematch-- in what, like a week?
:'''Collins''': Yeah, I'm real concerned about payback. Yeah, I hope your ma don't die while I'm writing you up, either. Have a nice day.
:'''Tommy''': ''[whispers]'' Shithead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': Two fags in a tree.
:'''Lou''': It's a tree-some!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Where's Elvis?
:'''Tommy''': What?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Isn't this heaven?
:'''Tommy''': No, it's my garage.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Goddamn it! I'm alive. Shit!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy throws money into the air]''
:'''Tommy''': I think you asked for what? Four grand? There's about six or seven here.
:'''Janet''': Where did you get it, Tom?
:'''Tommy''': The harder I work, the luckier I goddamned get. 
 
=== ''Mom'' [1.11] ===

:'''Tommy''': ''[to Laura]'' Let me tell you something, sister, you serve two purposes in this house-- you can give me a blow job or make me a sandwich. I'm not in the mood for head and I had a late breakfast, so you're shit out of luck.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I'm tellin' ya brother. Havin' your picture in this calendar is like having a license to mint pussy.
:'''Lou''': &quot;Mint pussy.&quot; May be one of the worst Ben &amp; Jerry flavors of all time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[About Sean's picture in the Fireman's calendar]'' You look like the Marlboro Man.
:'''Sean''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. If the Marlboro Man smoked cock instead of cigarettes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': Did you go outside like that?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Like what?
:'''Tommy''': Like that. With your joint hangin' out.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Hey, you got issues with the human body, that's your problem. That's your shame-based religious upbringing rearing its ugly head.
:'''Tommy''': Speakin' of ugly heads.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Don't lay your issues on me. I got no problem being naked.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, yeah? Why don't you go upstairs and look in the mirror? I think there's more than one problem goin' on down there.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After they found out they were cheating on each other]''
:'''Lou''': Are you gonna stop seein' him?
:'''Phyllis''': Are you gonna stop seein' her?
:'''Lou''': Who is this guy?
:'''Phyllis''': Who's the girl?
:'''Lou''': Do I know 'em?
:'''Phyllis''': Do I know her?
:'''Lou''': You know what? Maybe, maybe we shouldn't be asking questions right now.
:'''Phyllis''': Maybe not.
:'''Lou''': You know what? Lemme just say this, okay? If you told me, what you told me and I didn't have somethin' goin' on the side, I would have been so goddamn pissed you wouldn't even believe.
:'''Phyllis''': Well, you know, I'd be pissed too.

=== ''Leaving'' [1.12] ===

:''[Tommy's kitchen is a total mess]''
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Hey, Tom. I made chili.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, no shit. What did 'ya do, mix it with a goddamn shotgun?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Shelia wants to tell something to Tommy but she won't tell him over the phone]''
:'''Tommy''': It's gonna drive me crazy, not that you don't have a lock on that particular skill, right now.
:'''Shelia''': Why do you have to be such an asshole?
:'''Tommy''': Practice.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[A guy was impaled by a tree branch from a rooftop garden]''
:'''Lou''': Maybe we should uh, go up and talk to the tree. I mean, it looks like an accident but you never know.
:'''Tommy''': Well, there might be a couple of scrubs up there that saw somethin'. I say we go up, uproot the whole goddamn garden and bring it in for questioning.
:'''Lou''': You know, just 'cause it's vegetation it thinks it can get away with this shit.
:'''Tommy''': Shameful.
:'''Lou''': It really is.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Janet, who wants more money]'' Yeah, lemme pull down my pants and grab the money that's growin' outta my ass.

=== ''Sanctuary'' [1.13] ===

:''[The whole crew is looking at the NYC skyline]''
:'''Sean''': It's a nice view, huh?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. It'll never be the same for me.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, me either.
:'''Laura''': Even when they put up whatever it is that they're puttin' up.
:'''Franco''': It's like they're tryin' to erase what happened. You know?
:'''Chief Reilly''': It's insulting. Remember when they had those spotlights right after 9/11? I couldn't take that. I like it like this... empty. Just the way those scumbags left it. No spotlights, no new buildings, just empty.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. That's the thing about the spotlight, you know. Walk out into it and at first everybody thinks they see a good-lookin' all-American hero. But then you stay out there long enough and you know, they start to notice certain things. Maybe your nose is a little crooked, you know, maybe your teeth are too crooked. Maybe you got a little scar on your upper lip. Your hair's not right. One eye's bigger than the other. Next thing 'ya know they think they're lookin' at some kinda goddamn monster. Like they're lookin' at King Kong. Then they start throwin' shit at 'ya.
:'''Lou''': Well, I'll tell ya one thing. That morning they threw a couple a jets into a couple a buildings. And they threw at us the biggest job in the history of our profession. And what do we do? We gave up 343 of our guys to save... at least 10,000.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. And look at us now: Three years later and still waitin' for a goddamn raise. I'll tell 'ya what guys, we were on our own that morning and we're still on our own today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Mickey told Franco that Tommy was seeing Shelia]''
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Mickey, in confession]'' Bless me father for I have sinned, and so have you. ''[he grabs him and starts beating him up]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sean is dating a girl who's a really bad kisser]''
:'''Chief Reilly''': Now, you're talkin' about bad kissin'. Are you talkin' about too much saliva bad kissin'? Or using your tongue like an iguana eatin' a fly bad kissin'? ''[Sean and Franco give him a look]'' Hey, I used to be a player.
:'''Franco''': That was disturbing, Chief.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. And disgusting.
:'''Chief Reilly''': You shoulda saw the chick that I did it with.

[[Category:Rescue Me seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>ralqmh6pesyl1g803qrvzxei4veg7as</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965097</id>
      <parentid>3965096</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:06:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>HazelEyedKiki</username>
        <id>839297</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Orphans [1.05] */</comment>
      <origin>3965097</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="36934" sha1="4rh03miia950goiaxlurvs16t2hi9hg" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Rescue Me (season 1)|1]] [[Rescue Me (season 2)|2]] [[Rescue Me (season 3)|3]] [[Rescue Me (season 4)|4]] [[Rescue Me (season 5)|5]] [[Rescue Me (season 6)|6]] [[Rescue Me (season 7)|7]] | [[Rescue Me (American TV series)|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Rescue Me (American TV series)|Rescue Me]]''''' (2004–2011) is an American comedy-drama TV series, airing on [[w:FX (TV channel)|FX]], about the professional and personal lives of [[w:New York City|New York City]] [[w:Firefighter|firefighters]] after the trauma of the [[w:September 11, 2001 attacks|September 11]].

=== ''Guts'' [1.01] ===

:'''Tommy''': You want to know how big my balls are? My balls are bigger than two of your heads duct-taped together. I've been in the middle of shit that would make you piss your pants right now. Uptown, downtown, Harlem, Brooklyn. But there ain't no medals on my chest, assholes, 'cause I ain't no hero. I'm a fireman. We're not in the business of making heroes here. We're in the business of discovering cowards, 'cause that's what you are if you can't take the heat. You're a pussy, and there ain't no room for pussies in the FDNY. ''[to a snickering recruit in the first row]'' What are you laughing at, shithead? Huh? What's so god damn funny?
:'''Recruit''': I just... .
:'''Tommy''': Shut up! You speak when spoken to. You pussies better pray you don't get assigned to my firehouse. Because I have seen it all. I knew sixty men who gave their lives at Ground Zero. Sixty. Four of them from my house. Vito Castella... found him almost whole. Ricky Davis... found him almost whole, hugging a civilian woman. Bobby Vincent... found his head. And my cousin, Jimmy Keefe, my best friend. You know what they found of him? What I was able to bring back and give to his parents? A finger. That's all. A finger. These four men were better human beings and better firefighters than any of you will ever be.
:'''Firefighting Class Instructor''': Say &quot;thank you,&quot; firefighting upper class!
:'''Firefighting Upper Class''': Thank you, Firefighter Gavin, sir!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After everyone gets up and leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, Doc...
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Oh, you don't need to explain, I was at another firehouse last night and the reaction was quite similar.
:'''Tommy''': The guys, uh, they're not gonna talk to a psychotherapist in the firehouse, especially not uh, female one.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': What about the female firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': We don't have any female firefighters in this house.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are you threatened by women?
:'''Tommy''': No.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': You-- you don't seem to think that a woman can be a firefighter.
:'''Tommy''': I'll tell you what, it's not about being a man or a woman, okay? It's about doing the job. It's about me getting home safe and sound in the morning to see my kids, okay? So, you got a woman who can do the job better than the guys on my crew? Bring her on. You know? You got a martian, or a cyborg, or a Chinaman that can do the job, bring them on too.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': Are there any Chinese firefighters?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, probably. Somewhere in... China.
:'''Dr. Goldberg''': I'm sensing a lot of hostility.
:'''Tommy''': You are very, very perceptive.
:''Dr. Goldberg''': That's what they tell me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is laying money out on the table]''
:'''Tommy''': Alright, we're going to play a little game because Daddy needs to know some information on Mommy's new boyfriend. Alright? 
:''[they all are silent]''
:'''Katy''': But Mommy doesn't want us to talk about that.
:'''Tommy''': I understand that, sweetheart. That's why we have the money.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': We have sex with woman who ain't our wives and we make every detail available to the other guys.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, well, maybe I'm a gentleman.
:'''Chief''': Yeah, and I'm growing tits.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you should check a mirror, pal.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Jimmy''': All right, hold on, hold on, hold on. Let's review. Why are you two separated?
:'''Tommy''': According to her?
:'''Jimmy''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': You know, I... she says I couldn't open up, I wasn't emotionally available, blah, blah, blah.

=== ''Gay'' [1.02] ===

:''[Talking about a fireman who retired and them came out of the closet, and also claims to know more gay firemen]''
:'''Sean''': Well, maybe he just thought they were gay because they were well-groomed, and uh, into fashion. You know what I mean?
:'''Chief Reilly, Franco, Lou, and Tommy''': No.
:'''Sean''': Well, maybe they weren't homosexuals. Maybe they were metrosexuals.
:'''Lou''': What?
:'''Tommy''': My daughter used that term last week.
:'''Franco''': The teenager?
:'''Tommy''': The eight-year-old.
:'''Chief Reilly''': What in the sweet chocolate christ is a metrosexual?
:'''Mike''': It means that you aren't gay but you like to do certain things that might be considered gay. ''[they all stare at him, looking totally clueless and in shock]'' Right?
:'''Sean''': No, asshole. He doesn't know what the hell he's talkin' about. Look, a metrosexual is like a straight guy who happens to you know, also like to go shoppin' and-- and get facials and stuff.
:'''Tommy''': Holy shit.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shoppin' for food?
:'''Mike''': Nice food.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, and wine, and... clothes. Yeah, I'm not explaining it right. Franco you know what a metrosexual is, right?
:'''Franco''': Uh, that would be a huge goddamn 'no'.
:'''Sean''': It's not like a gay thing...
:'''Mike''': It's gay and it's not gay. It's like straight, regular guys who get like facelifts and bikini waxes.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Enough. Enough.
:'''Mike''': Male bikini waxes.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Enough! Nobody in this firehouse goes out and goes shoppin' anymore unless it's for underwear or for boots or for a pair of goddamn gloves. And nobody, and I mean nobody, goes and gets a facial unless that means putting water on your face to clean up after catchin' a job. And the word metrosexual from this point on is banned from this quarters. (walks out)
:'''Lou''': What the hell's a male bikini wax?
:'''Sean''': That's when they take the hair off of your scrotom.
:'''Franco''': Ow.
:'''Lou''': ''[in a pained voice]'' Why?
:'''Mike''': Chicks dig it.
:'''Franco''': Chicks dig us shaving our balls?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mike''': ''[about Sean]'' He, uh, got a ball wax.
:'''Franco''': A ball wax?
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Me and this chick that I've been banging, we were talking about it right. And she said that it makes the sex better for women, right? So, there's nothin' on TV last night, so I get look through the yellow pages and I find a place and I do it.
:'''Franco''': So, this place, did you find it under &quot;ball&quot; or &quot;wax?&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': Let me tell you something, okay?
:'''Janet''': Hey, don't you threaten me.
:'''Tommy''': If I want to threaten you, I will! Okay? You start a shit storm about my kids with me, you take 'em anywhere you want, I will hunt you down and I will find you. Four corners of the Earth, I will find you and I will take those kids back. That's not a threat, that's a goddamn promise, bitch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What is it with these gay people? They're everywhere now: sitcoms, movies. You see the thing in the paper about same sex marriage?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Same sex marriages? Hey, right now I'd settle for a &quot;some&quot; sex marriage.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': No, I'll tell ya, brother. I am pro-lesbian. I am a big supporter of the lesbian community.
:'''Jimmy''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, I wish my daughter was a lesbian.
:'''Jimmy''': Which one?
:'''Tommy''': Both. Why don't they have a pill for that?

=== ''Kansas'' [1.03] ===

:'''Sean''': I like hockey, I could never play though. I've got weak ankles.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, that's not the only thing that you got that's weak.
:'''Sean''': What does that mean?
:'''Franco''': Nothing.
:'''Sean''': No, what does that mean?
:'''Franco''': It was a joke, Sean.
:'''Sean''': Well, what're you sayin' then, like I got weak knees?
:'''Franco''': No.
:'''Sean''': Arms? What?
:'''Franco''': I was talking about your mind. I was saying that you've got a weak mind.
:'''Sean''': You know what, Franco, do I piss all over you all of the time? I don't think so. I don't understand why you gotta be such a prick to me.
:'''Lou''': Hey, girls, do I have to separate you?
:'''Sean''': He said that I had a weak mind, Lou.
:'''Lou''': Yeah, like he's pulling that outta thin air.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What is that?
:'''Colleen''': What, the cookies?
:'''Tommy''': No. Below the cookies, peeking out of your pants, and it better not be a tattoo because if it is a tattoo, you're not gonna see the light of day ever again.
:'''Colleen''': It's not like it's huge.
:'''Tommy''': Move the cookies. ''[she moves them]'' Oh my, god. What the hell?
:'''Colleen''': It's a shamrock.
:'''Tommy''': I can see it's a shamrock.
:'''Colleen''': You're always saying that we should be proud of being Irish.
:'''Tommy''': You wanna be proud you're Irish? Wave a flag, march in a parade, have 100 kids ... not yet. Oh my god.
:'''Colleen''': It's not that big of a deal, Mom has a tattoo on her butt.
:'''Tommy''': How do you know that?
:'''Colleen''': She showed me.
:'''Tommy''': She showed you? Jesus Christ. ''[groans]'' I'll tell ya' what, you're gonna get rid of that yourself, or I'm gonna get rid of it for you.
:'''Colleen''': How?
:'''Tommy''': I'm sure Black &amp; Decker has some kind of attachment.
:'''Colleen''': It's ''my'' body. You can't tell me what to do with it.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, really? Let me just remind you of a couple things, okay? When you turn 18 years old, you can move out of this house and you can get a flower tattooed on your ass, and a rainbow tattooed on your tits, but until then as long as you live under my roof, you play by my rules. No tattoos.
:'''Colleen''': I didn't get it while I was living under your roof, I got it while I was living under Mom's.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Phyllis''': You don't need to lie to me, either. What are you doing?
:'''Lou''': Okay... You want the truth?
:'''Phyllis''': Yeah.
:'''Lou''': I've been writing poetry.
:'''Phyllis''': What?
:'''Lou''': Poetry. Since... just after 9/11. It's kind of been, I don't know, my therapy, I guess. I don't know.
:'''Phyllis''': Writing poetry?
:'''Lou''': Yeah.
:'''Phyllis''': Oh my God, why couldn't it have been the porn?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy pays his nephew for sending a computer virus to Roger]''
:'''Tommy''': ''[sighs]'' I could only get 300 bucks out of the ATM.
:'''Damian''': That's okay. You can owe me the rest. I trust you.
:'''Tommy''': You know what, kid? I was at your christening and I didn't drown you, okay? So let's think about who owes who. All right?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': I didn't come here the other night looking for a fight. And I didn't come tonight looking for one either. I came to talk to that Teff guy. Well, he started the fight. He threw the first punch. You saw him do that. And I know a couple other guys in there saw it too.
:'''Vinny''': So?
:'''Chief Reilly''': So, uh... I mean it's possible I... I might need a witness and I was hoping you'd, you know, do the right thing.
:'''Vinny''': You know, funny thing about gay bashers: they're all tough guys until they get caught.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I never--
:'''Vinny''': I saw what every other guy in the place saw. You threw the first punch. 

=== ''DNA'' [1.04] ===

:'''Janet''': ''[at the hospital]'' Tommy, I can't get any answers in there.
:'''Tommy''': You know what? ''[grabs her arm and pushes her against the building, and pins her there]'' Hey, what did I tell you, huh? What did I tell you?
:'''Janet''': Get the hell off of me!
:'''Tommy''': I told you to get your priorities straight, huh. Get your shit together. You wanted to be in charge of the kids, and what happened? She's lying in a hospital bed while you're trying to get laid with you loser goddamn boyfriend! ''[they shove each other and he finally lets her go]''
:'''Janet''': And where have you been?!
:'''Tommy''': Where was I? At work! Paying your goddamn bills!
:'''Janet''': Tommy, this isn't about our bullshit. This is about our little girl in there.
:'''Tommy''': Don't tell me.
:'''Janet''': Goddamn you, Tommy.
:'''Tommy''': It's on ''your'' head!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Father Mickey''': Tom, I, uh, I don't know what you want me to say.
:'''Tommy''': Mick... I want you to say that it's all... it's bullshit. You know? There is no plan, there is no map. There's no golden ring at the end of the ride. It's just... bullshit. You know? ''[sighs]'' I want you to take away the hope, man, that's the thing that's killing me. You know,it's just... it's like, uh... I'm just hanging here, man. Hope is making me think I can fix my marriage, you know? The day of Jimmy's funeral... you stood up on that altar and you said, &quot;Sometimes we don't know why God does the things that he does.&quot; But I'm telling you... Mick... if he takes my little girl tonight... I'm going to want to know why.
:'''Father Mickey''': That's why you got to hold on to the hope, Tom. 'Cause in the end, that's all we got left.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': You remember that blonde that we met at the Bubble Bar last month? You were with me, right?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, yeah. The one you banged that night?
:'''Tommy''': Actually, I've been banging her ever since, but I don't know her name.
:'''Franco''': Damn. How're you pulling that off?
:'''Tommy''': Well, it's like a late night booty-call. Not a lot of conversation, you know?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, those are the best.
:'''Tommy''': Well, I gotta come up with a name soon, man.
:'''Franco''': Yeah. You know what? You could do that thing where you introduce her to somebody. You say the other person's name but not hers, and then she has to say &quot;Hi, I'm...&quot; Fill in the blank.
:'''Tommy''': Never gonna work.
:'''Franco''': Why not?
:'''Tommy''': Because I never take this chick out in public.
:'''Franco''': Ah, yeah.
:'''Tommy''': See?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, you got yourself a real goddamn dilemma there.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, broads. It's not enough that you're bangin' 'em like crazy, now you gotta know their names.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Wait a minute, you passed on a three way? Was she hot?
:'''Mike''': Way hot.
:'''Lou''': What're you nuts?
:'''Mike''': Lou, I would have to had sex in front of another guy.
:'''Lou''': So block him out.
:'''Mike''': But what if I get hit with friendly fire?
:'''Lou''': Well, make sure you're done first and then get the hell out of the way. Jesus, it's true what they say: Three-ways, like youth, are wasted on the young.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': ''[On the phone, Franco is in a club with two girls by him]'' So, it's, uh, it's Nancy or Lauren, huh? I don't know, man, she didn't look like a Nancy to me. I'd go with Lauren.
:'''Tommy''': I kinda secretly was hoping she was a Nancy.
:'''Franco''': Why's that?
:'''Tommy''': 'Cause Nancy's give better head.
:'''Franco''': Oh, you've researched that?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, basing it on the two Nancy's that I've known.
:'''Franco''': So, uh, you been with a Lauren?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, one.
:'''Franco''': Oh, yeah? And the head was uh...
:'''Tommy''': Look, there's no such thing as bad head, it's just a matter of degrees.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, agreed. ''[to the girls next to him]'' Uh, girls what're you're names?
:'''Heather''': Heather.
:'''Brittney''': Brittney.
:'''Franco''': ''[to Tommy]'' What about Heather and Brittney? Where do those two names fall on the chart?
:'''Tommy''': Heather and Brittney I'd say... top 3.
:'''Franco''': Oh, yeah. It's my night.

=== ''Orphans'' [1.05] ===

:''[Tommy has just read an &quot;anonymous&quot; poem]''
:'''Franco''': Holy shit.
:'''Sean''': Wow.
:'''Lou''': Powerful.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, powerfully bad. It sucks.
:'''Lou''': I don't know, it's not that bad. It rhymes.
:'''Tommy''': Well, so what? My ten-year-old can make stuff rhyme, it doesn't mean he's the next, uh... ''[to Franco]'' Name a poet.
:'''Sean''': [[w:Angie Dickinson|Angie Dickinson]].
:'''Tommy''': Angie Dickinson from Police Woman?
:'''Franco''': Nah, I think you mean [[Emily Dickinson]].

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': By the way, in the future, when you have something you wrote and you want me to read it, just bring it to me. I'll sit down, I'll read it, I'll digest it and I'll give you the most honest assessment that I can.
:'''Lou''': You'd do that?
:'''Tommy''': For you?
:'''Lou''': Yeah.
:'''Tommy''': No.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': You don't do that, Sean. You don't bang a guy's girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, or his sister without his permission. And I mean crystal-goddamn-clear permission.
:'''Sean''': You haven't even spoken to her, in like, five years.
:'''Franco''': Guys?
:'''Tommy''': You broke the rules.
:'''Lou''': Big time.
:'''Sean''': Wh--? Ho-- How? Explain to me how. ''[Lou interrupts him]'' Let me finish my -- ''[Lou interrupts him again]'' Can I at least-- ''[Lou interrupts him]''
:'''Tommy''': Look, you run into a guy's ex-girlfriend in a bar and feel her up.
:'''Lou''': Yes.
:'''Tommy''': You can be in a bar, meet a guy's ex-wife, and...
:'''Lou''': ''[makes circular gestures on his chest]'' Titty action.
:'''Tommy''': A little bit of titty action. You can even grab guy's sister's ass in a bar that the guy actually happens to be in.
:'''Lou''': Yes, you could.
:'''Tommy''': And it's all explainable under the giant umbrella of the huge, 'Sorry-I-Was-Drunk' rule.
:'''Lou''': Like Visa and Mastercard, accepted the world over and never argued.
:'''Tommy''': Never argued. Which was why the rule was created by the way, by the... Romans?
:'''Lou''': Ah, even earlier than that, my friend: the Druids.
:'''Sean''': Listen, Franco didn't want to have anything to do with her.
:'''Lou''': He just doesn't get it.
:'''Tommy''': ''[counting on his fingers]'': Look, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, sister, half-sister: ''[sweeps his hands]'' No pussy!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Janet, about Colleen]'' Did you even know she was going to the city with the Murphy Kid that night, let alone joyriding around Manhattan with him? And I'll bet my left nut that that kid's on drugs. Did you hear what I said? I said my left nut, which just happens to be my favorite nut.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Guy''': Are you Tommy Gavin?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, who's askin'?
:'''Guy''': We're Roger's friends.
:'''Tommy''': Well, that's your problem, not mine. ''[the three guys form a circle around him]'' What? What are you guys gonna do? Audit me? ''[they beat him up]''

=== ''Revenge'' [1.06] ===

:'''Lou''': How many were there?
:'''Tommy''': Three. They got me outside the bar.
:'''Lou''': Did they do any damage?
:'''Tommy''': Come on. They work on Wall Street the worst they can give me is a paper cut. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': I'll take the high road.
:'''Lou''': Huh. You?
:'''Tommy''': Okay, maybe not the high road but certainly not the lowest road.
:'''Lou''': Which is where you normally travel.
:'''Tommy''': Hey, you kiddin' me? I drew up the original maps.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After they bet Sean that he couldn't get to first base and he did with a transvestite, although he doesn't know that she is one]''
:'''Tommy''': Well, the thing is uh, we uh... We wanna go double or nothin'.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Oh, god.
:'''Sean''': Wait, wait, wait. What's the bet?
:'''Tommy''': 80 bucks says you can't close the deal by the weekend.
:'''Sean''': What you mean sleep with her?
:'''Tommy''': Full penetration. Before the weekend.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, I don't know.
:'''Tommy''': Come on. I thought you had game, big shot.
:'''Sean''': I do. I got game. I-- I just don't wanna rush it. It's just something about this girl, she's-- she's different.
:'''Chief Reilly''': No shit.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Oh, God.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. It was somethin' that she was doin' with her mouth. I don't know what it was but it was all...wet. ''[Chief looks like he's gonna puke]'' What's wrong? Are you okay? ''[Chief walks towards the bathroom]''
:'''Tommy''': He had a bad sandwich this afternoon.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Telling the Chief how he found out that the girl he was seeing is a transvestite, he found out when he was getting a blow job]'
:'''Chief Reilly''': Man, you must have freaked out.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, yeah. It was pretty weird but I didn't want to make a big scene so once he was through I told him---
:'''Chief Reilly''': Wait, hold on a second. After he was through? You mean you let him finish the knob job?
:'''Sean''': Well, the guy was givin' me a blow-job, Chief. I didn't wanna be rude.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I'm gonna pretend that I didn't hear that.

=== ''Butterfly'' [1.07] ===

:'''[Janet is drunk and kisses Tommy]''
:'''Tommy''': And what are we doing?
:'''Janet''': We're gonna go upstairs.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, we are?
:'''Janet''': Mm hmm.
:'''Tommy''': Okay. Now, not that I don't wanna go upstairs, but okay, where are we going with this?
:'''Janet''': What, you don't want me?
:'''Tommy''': No, that's not what I said. I did not say that. What --
:'''Janet''': Tommy, we were always at our best ''[kisses him]'' when we were in bed. A million problems everywhere else, but in bed... ''[kisses him]'' Come on.
:'''Tommy''': Alright.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What're you ladies talking about?
:'''Franco''': The firefighter calender. I'm doing it again this year.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, he gets to choose his own month.
:'''Tommy''': Great.
:'''Mike''': So what month are you going for?
:'''Sean''': I'd try for February. Work that whole Valentine's Day thing.
:'''Franco''': Nah, common mistake. Shortest month of the year.
:'''Mike''': So, what's a good month?
:'''Franco''': Well, you definitely don't wanna be December. Nobody pays attention to you until the last 30 days of the year. You wanna be in the first four or five months to maximize booty potential. I'm thinkin' April, May, in there, you know? It's spring. Winter clothes are comin' off. Chicks are thinkin' about gettin' laid.
:'''Mike''': Yeah? Interesting.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, it's a science, and I'm the mad scientist. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Two grand for a porch?
:'''Franco''': Last one we did, we got what, 600 bucks?
:'''Chief''': Who is this guy? The king of chumps?
:'''Tommy''': Nah, some shrink, you know? I figure we get Charlie Walsh's cousin to give us the lumber for what, 300 bones? And we'll divide the rest up. You in?
:'''Lou''': Yeah, for that kind of money, I might show up in a tux.
:'''Tommy''': Franco?
:'''Franco''': In.
:'''Mike''': I'll do it.
:'''Tommy''': Let me tell you something kid: First time doing a porch job, you work for free.
:'''Lou''': Let me clarify further. Not only do you not get paid, you generally do all the work while we sit around drinking beer and shooting the shit.
:'''Tommy''': And you gotta buy the beer.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, a couple of those suitcase things. MGD is good.
:'''Mike''': Guys, I just remembered... I'm busy.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, you're busy helping us queer-bait.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Janet''': Tommy, nothing's changed.
:'''Tommy''': I didn't come over to you last night, you came lookin' for-- and now you're going to tell me that it shouldn't have happened?
:'''Janet''': I was drunk, I was frustrated. I'm tired of being alone.
:'''Tommy''': You're not alone, okay? I live across the street. Which you gladly took advantage of last night.
:'''Janet''': But you don't understand. I need something more-- something that I can't get from you. ''[Tommy makes a face]'' Yes, the sex was great. But the sex is always great with us, Tommy. We've never had a problem connecting on a physical level, but an emotional level--
:'''Tommy''': Oh, Jesus Christ. I knew that was what you were going to say!
:'''Janet''': Hey, I can't do this anymore, I'm tired of being this lonely.
:'''Tommy''': You know what? You're nuts, you should see a shrink because you are--
:'''Janet''': I am sorry.
:'''Tommy''': You're sorry? Bullshit. You come over my house. You lure me into bed, you bang me, you get my hopes up and now you're sorry?
:'''Janet''': I wanted to see if it still worked.
:'''Tommy''': If what worked? My dick?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Hey, I went with Dwight the other night to the city, we caught a show and afterwards I look into this bar and who do I see? Our very own little probie making out with some broad to beat the band.
:'''Tommy''': So...?
:'''Lou''': So... this chick is old enough to be his mother.
:'''Franco''': Oh god, I just caught a chill.
:'''Tommy''': How old?
:'''Lou''': I don't know, I didn't have time to cut her in half and count the rings but she's pretty old, I mean for him. I'm guessin' late 40's.
:'''Sean''': Wow, really?
:'''Lou''': Yeah. ''[Mike walks up]'' Hey, speak of the devil. Hey, kid, your ears burning?
:'''Mike''': Huh?
:'''Tommy''': Hey, are you bangin' some old broad?
:'''Lou''': And if you are, a word of caution: A broken hip takes a very long time to heal.
:'''Mike''': Hey, she's not that old. She's only 46.
:'''Sean''': Well, that's nothin' in dog years.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, which probably applies to her.

=== ''Inches'' [1.08] ===

:'''Chief Reilly''': What're you guys talking about?
:'''Sean''': Nothing.
:'''Lou''': Eight and a smidgen of what?
:'''Mike''': Well, last night I was watchin' TV and there was nothin' on really so I---
:'''Sean''': Cut to the chase.
:'''Mike''': And I got a hard-on and I was lookin' at it and I was thinkin' about jerkin' off and--
:'''Sean''': Would you cut to the chase?
:'''Mike''': Well, there was a ruler on the table and I kinda --
:'''Sean''': He measured his cock.
:'''Chief Reilly''': You measured your cock?
:'''Lou''': And it was eight inches?
:'''Mike''': Well, mine was seven and a half... almost. His was eight.
:'''Sean''': Well, eight and a titch.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I was readin' FHM yesterday and they said that the average cock is like six inches long.
:'''Mike''': Yeah we're huge! ''[slaps Sean's hand]''
:'''Sean''': Huge.
:'''Chief''': Whoa, whoa, whoa. Before you two ponies start swingin' your johnson's around, answer one question for me. Did you measure from the top or bottom?
:'''Tommy''': Ooh. A little fly in the ointment.
:'''Chief''': Did you go from the under carriage, from the ball-sac to the tip?
:''[Mike and Sean exchange looks]''
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Yeah, we did.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Well then you might as well have been measuring from the base of your spine because everybody gets at least an inch going the other way. You gotta go from the pubic bone to the tip.
:'''Mike''': Ah, no way, that means I'm only like 6 1/2.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Almost.
:'''Mike''': Shit.
:'''Sean''': I don't know if you're right about that, Chief.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Been there, done this, boys. I got twenty that starts the &quot;biggest dick in the crew&quot; contest. Who wants in?
:'''Mike''': You gonna measure yours?
:'''Chief Reilly''': I haven't seen my feet in ten years let alone my dick.
:'''Tommy''': Chief, I got a question.
:'''Chief Reilly''': And I think I know what that question is Firefighter Gavin.
:'''Tommy''': Really?
:'''Chief''': Girth?
:'''Tommy''': Ha. Exactly.
:'''Sean''': Wait. What? Girth.
:'''Tommy''': Circumference, asshole.
:'''Lou''': That's gonna be a completely different story. I'm gonna double the wager.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': Well, you know uh, Chief. I really don't think this whole measuring from the top thing is really right, I mean who invented that? I mean you lose and inch, it's not really fair.
:'''Chief Reilly''': From the pubic bone to the tip. 'Cause that's all that enters the vagina. From the pubic bone, out to the tip. Done. ''[Sean makes a weird face]'' What?
:'''Sean''': Nothing. I-- just that I would never hear you say the word &quot;vagina.&quot;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Vagina.
:'''Sean''': Stop.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Va-gina.
:'''Sean''': Come on, Chief. Stop.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uncle Teddy''': ''[to the monkey]'' You filthy little son of a bitch. You keep screamin' and I'll stick a banana right up your ass.

=== ''Alarm'' [1.09] ===

:'''Chief Reilly''': Look, guys I wanted to get you together because we have a situation that's arisin...arosen. It's pretty important.
:'''Sean''': It's arisen.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shut up. ''[to Lou]'' Is he right?
:'''Lou''': Amazingly, yes. How?
:'''Sean''': I've been bangin' this chick who plays alotta Scrabble. Hey, did you know that Q-A-T is a word?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Shut up.
:'''Sean''': I swear.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I said shut up.
:'''Sean''': Alright. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[about Colleen]'' I'm not exactly over here doin' a jig because she turned into a lezbo.
:'''Janet''': Hey, Tom. She is not a lesbian.
:'''Tommy''': She has a girlfriend.
:'''Janet''': She's 15 years old. She's only had one boyfriend. When she's had to deal with 5 or 6 guys, then I can see her going gay.

=== ''Immortal'' [1.10] ===

:'''Laura''': I know you guys are talkin' about my tits and my ass. Just in case you are wondering, I'm a 34-C cup, my nipples are slightly larger than average and stand up like top-hats when aroused. My ass is tight as a snare drum but still soft to the touch. Any more questions?
:'''Tommy''': Wow. ''[Laura puts Tommy's sandwich on the table]''
:'''Sean''': Yeah. Can I get one of those? ''[points to the sandwich]''
:'''Laura''': No. ''[leaves]''
:'''Tommy''': Did she just say top-hats?
:'''Franco''': I believe she did.
:'''Lou''': I've always been a big fan of formal wear.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy is pulled over for speeding through a downtown intersection]''
:'''Tommy''': Hey, how you doing? Hey, Collins man!
:'''Collins''': You better have a good excuse, Gavin.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, you know what man, I got a phone call...
:'''Collins''': That was some dare-devil shit back there.
:'''Tommy''': I know, I know. I got a phone call about twenty minutes ago. My mom had a heart attack and I got to get to a hospital.
:'''Collins''': Bullshit.
:'''Tommy''': No bro, I'm serious!
:'''Collins''': Give me your license and reg... All right, the honeymoon's over Gavin, all right? So tell all your friends and all that hero worship you got after 9/11 ain't getting paid any dues anymore. We lost guys downtown too, but nobody even talks about us. 343 firemen. There was almost 100 cops!
:'''Tommy''': That's true. Nobody's forgetting about the cops.
:'''Collins''': Guess what? You so much as look at a cop the wrong way and you're paying the price. All right, asshole?
:'''Tommy''': You know this is going to come back to bite you in the ass. We got a big hockey game coming up again. A rematch-- in what, like a week?
:'''Collins''': Yeah, I'm real concerned about payback. Yeah, I hope your ma don't die while I'm writing you up, either. Have a nice day.
:'''Tommy''': ''[whispers]'' Shithead.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': Two fags in a tree.
:'''Lou''': It's a tree-some!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Where's Elvis?
:'''Tommy''': What?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Isn't this heaven?
:'''Tommy''': No, it's my garage.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Goddamn it! I'm alive. Shit!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Tommy throws money into the air]''
:'''Tommy''': I think you asked for what? Four grand? There's about six or seven here.
:'''Janet''': Where did you get it, Tom?
:'''Tommy''': The harder I work, the luckier I goddamned get. 
 
=== ''Mom'' [1.11] ===

:'''Tommy''': ''[to Laura]'' Let me tell you something, sister, you serve two purposes in this house-- you can give me a blow job or make me a sandwich. I'm not in the mood for head and I had a late breakfast, so you're shit out of luck.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I'm tellin' ya brother. Havin' your picture in this calendar is like having a license to mint pussy.
:'''Lou''': &quot;Mint pussy.&quot; May be one of the worst Ben &amp; Jerry flavors of all time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[About Sean's picture in the Fireman's calendar]'' You look like the Marlboro Man.
:'''Sean''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. If the Marlboro Man smoked cock instead of cigarettes.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': Did you go outside like that?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Like what?
:'''Tommy''': Like that. With your joint hangin' out.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Hey, you got issues with the human body, that's your problem. That's your shame-based religious upbringing rearing its ugly head.
:'''Tommy''': Speakin' of ugly heads.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Don't lay your issues on me. I got no problem being naked.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, yeah? Why don't you go upstairs and look in the mirror? I think there's more than one problem goin' on down there.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After they found out they were cheating on each other]''
:'''Lou''': Are you gonna stop seein' him?
:'''Phyllis''': Are you gonna stop seein' her?
:'''Lou''': Who is this guy?
:'''Phyllis''': Who's the girl?
:'''Lou''': Do I know 'em?
:'''Phyllis''': Do I know her?
:'''Lou''': You know what? Maybe, maybe we shouldn't be asking questions right now.
:'''Phyllis''': Maybe not.
:'''Lou''': You know what? Lemme just say this, okay? If you told me, what you told me and I didn't have somethin' goin' on the side, I would have been so goddamn pissed you wouldn't even believe.
:'''Phyllis''': Well, you know, I'd be pissed too.

=== ''Leaving'' [1.12] ===

:''[Tommy's kitchen is a total mess]''
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Hey, Tom. I made chili.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, no shit. What did 'ya do, mix it with a goddamn shotgun?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Shelia wants to tell something to Tommy but she won't tell him over the phone]''
:'''Tommy''': It's gonna drive me crazy, not that you don't have a lock on that particular skill, right now.
:'''Shelia''': Why do you have to be such an asshole?
:'''Tommy''': Practice.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[A guy was impaled by a tree branch from a rooftop garden]''
:'''Lou''': Maybe we should uh, go up and talk to the tree. I mean, it looks like an accident but you never know.
:'''Tommy''': Well, there might be a couple of scrubs up there that saw somethin'. I say we go up, uproot the whole goddamn garden and bring it in for questioning.
:'''Lou''': You know, just 'cause it's vegetation it thinks it can get away with this shit.
:'''Tommy''': Shameful.
:'''Lou''': It really is.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Janet, who wants more money]'' Yeah, lemme pull down my pants and grab the money that's growin' outta my ass.

=== ''Sanctuary'' [1.13] ===

:''[The whole crew is looking at the NYC skyline]''
:'''Sean''': It's a nice view, huh?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. It'll never be the same for me.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, me either.
:'''Laura''': Even when they put up whatever it is that they're puttin' up.
:'''Franco''': It's like they're tryin' to erase what happened. You know?
:'''Chief Reilly''': It's insulting. Remember when they had those spotlights right after 9/11? I couldn't take that. I like it like this... empty. Just the way those scumbags left it. No spotlights, no new buildings, just empty.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. That's the thing about the spotlight, you know. Walk out into it and at first everybody thinks they see a good-lookin' all-American hero. But then you stay out there long enough and you know, they start to notice certain things. Maybe your nose is a little crooked, you know, maybe your teeth are too crooked. Maybe you got a little scar on your upper lip. Your hair's not right. One eye's bigger than the other. Next thing 'ya know they think they're lookin' at some kinda goddamn monster. Like they're lookin' at King Kong. Then they start throwin' shit at 'ya.
:'''Lou''': Well, I'll tell ya one thing. That morning they threw a couple a jets into a couple a buildings. And they threw at us the biggest job in the history of our profession. And what do we do? We gave up 343 of our guys to save... at least 10,000.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. And look at us now: Three years later and still waitin' for a goddamn raise. I'll tell 'ya what guys, we were on our own that morning and we're still on our own today.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[After Mickey told Franco that Tommy was seeing Shelia]''
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Mickey, in confession]'' Bless me father for I have sinned, and so have you. ''[he grabs him and starts beating him up]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sean is dating a girl who's a really bad kisser]''
:'''Chief Reilly''': Now, you're talkin' about bad kissin'. Are you talkin' about too much saliva bad kissin'? Or using your tongue like an iguana eatin' a fly bad kissin'? ''[Sean and Franco give him a look]'' Hey, I used to be a player.
:'''Franco''': That was disturbing, Chief.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. And disgusting.
:'''Chief Reilly''': You shoulda saw the chick that I did it with.

[[Category:Rescue Me seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>4rh03miia950goiaxlurvs16t2hi9hg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rescue Me (season 2)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>232445</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965098</id>
      <parentid>3677371</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:11:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>HazelEyedKiki</username>
        <id>839297</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Justice [2.13] */</comment>
      <origin>3965098</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="33316" sha1="5nrk5mm91wsteoebek0ed3yp75nk9fj" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Rescue Me (season 1)|1]] [[Rescue Me (season 2)|2]] [[Rescue Me (season 3)|3]] [[Rescue Me (season 4)|4]] [[Rescue Me (season 5)|5]] [[Rescue Me (season 6)|6]] [[Rescue Me (season 7)|7]] | [[Rescue Me (American TV series)|Main]]
----
'''''[[w:Rescue Me (American TV series)|Rescue Me]]''''' (2004–2011) is an American comedy-drama TV series, airing on [[w:FX (TV channel)|FX]], about the professional and personal lives of [[w:New York City|New York City]] [[w:Firefighter|firefighters]] after the trauma of the [[w:September 11, 2001 attacks|September 11]] 2001 Attacks. This is the Second Season of Rescue Me. 

=== ''Voicemail'' [2.01] ===

:'''Franco''': What's with the camera?
:'''Laura''': Oh, my folks wanted to see where I worked. So I, uh, you know, I thought I'd send them a couple pictures give them an idea of what it looks like.
:'''Sean''': Oh, yeah? You gonna take any pictures of us?
:'''Laura''': I don't wanna scare them.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': Hey, Laura. Can you do me a favor?
:'''Laura''': If it involves any part of your body, no.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': Broads.
:'''Lou''': Crazy broads.
:'''Chief Reilly''': ''[sees Laura]'' Speaking of which. ''[to Laura]'' Banker's hours, sweetheart?
:'''Laura''': Sorry, darling.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Excuse me?
:'''Laura''': From now on, you call me names, you're getting them right back.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Don't push it, dollface.
:'''Laura''': Okay. Love-lum. ''[walks into the house]''
:'''Chief Reilly''': Love-lum?
:'''Lou''': I've used it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Lou catches Tommy sitting outside the house in his truck]''
:'''Tommy''': I got this new girlfriend, and uh, she's really into antiques. Uh, and I remember that antiques shop up here and I went over to look at---
:'''Lou''': ''[interrupting]'' Who the hell do you think you're talking to asshole? I've helped you concoct some of the most bullshit cover stories---
:'''Tommy''': ''[talking over Lou]'' This is not a concoction, okay?
:'''Lou''': ---Under the worst possible pressure situations okay?
:'''Tommy''': I have a new girlfriend, okay?
:'''Lou''': ''[mocking]'' Antiques, and my new girlfriend. Why don't you kiss my goddamn giant Irish pisshole? I've seen you out here in your truck 10, 20, times in the last three months. I figure you must to desperate to know what's going on so I figured I come out here and fill you in.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[About a woman who's reportedly trapped on the third floor, after the newspaper called the FDNY racist]'' Is she black?
:'''Chief Reilly''': I guess so. Given the neighborhood I guess. Why?
:'''Tommy''': Well, we're racists. Just think how much easier it would be if we only had to save the white people.
:'''Sean''': ''[laughs]'' Or even, you know, models.
:'''Tommy''': There you go.

=== ''Harmony'' [2.02] ===

:'''Sheila''': ''[in baby talk]'' The diddle baby wants his big Daddy to bring some more soupy. Do you think that big Daddy can bring some more soupy-woupy?
:'''Tommy''': That had better be the baby talking because if it's you, big Daddy's gonna come home and punch you right in the neck.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': ''[about his date]'' She said if I can find her friend a date we can move on to the next stage.
:'''Mike''': What's the next stage?
:'''Sean''': The blow job stage.
:'''Mike''': I like that stage.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, it's the best stage.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Franco puts the &quot;moves&quot; on Laura]''
:'''Laura''': Can I tell you how this is gonna go?
:'''Franco''': Yeah, please. I love a woman who takes control.
:'''Laura''': You're really cute, and really funny, and make great faces, until I sleep with you which I eventually will because you're a tall stud and I'm as unlaid as a pile of bricks.
:'''Franco''': Sounds good so far.
:'''Laura''': But then I'll want more out of the relationship eventually, you know, me being the woman and all and I'm so goddamn good in the sack you will actually try and commit for the first time in your life. You'll change for me Franco. But then you'll resent me and I'll resent you for resenting me. Pretty soon we won't even stand being in the same room together let alone forcing our body parts to intersect. But we have to be in the same room because we work together. So unless one of us dies in a fire or moves away or kills the other. We'll be forced to remember the bloody horrific train wreck of a relationship that we had that started with your hand on my coat. But it's your move, stud.
:'''Franco''': ''[pause]'' I'll see you tomorrow.
:'''Laura''': Smart man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': ''[to Chief Reilly, who has had his face scratched in his sleep by his wife who has Alzheimer's]'' Next time you try banging the cat, put little booties over its paws so it can't scratch. That's what I do.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': It's not like you need me around here anyways. The biggest call we got in the last three weeks was that old lady reporting a gas leak. Ended up she was the leakee.
:...
:'''Tommy''': I'm gonna go upstairs, and leave you three guys alone so you can blow each other.

=== ''Balls'' [2.03] ===

:'''Laura''': You call me &quot;honey&quot; one more time and I'm going to kick your nuts through the top of your head.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': ''[After sex]'' Alright, so what does this mean?
:'''Laura''': This meaning... ''[makes a motion to them with her fingers]'' This?
:'''Franco''': Yeah. What does this mean?
:'''Laura''': ''[laughs]'' Oh, come on. You did not just ask me that. I'm just the girl here.
:'''Franco''': Hey, well I wanna get things clear. We work together, things could get messy.
:'''Laura''': Okay, let me do the math for you. ''[points to herself]'' Drunk and horny. ''[points to Franco]'' Perpetually horny.
:'''Franco''': Yeah.
:'''Laura''': Equals out ''[looks at her watch]'' 34 minutes of extremely hot, but meaningless sex. So do you want to discuss this more? ''[pulls one foot above her head]'' Or do you want to go for the full hour?
:'''Franco''': Talking is way overrated, I'm sorry. ''[kisses her]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''John Sr.''': Hey, it's not about the money, Tommy.
:'''Tommy''': Well, then what's it about? Go ahead Dad and enlighten me.
:'''John Sr.''': It's about the sex.
:'''Tommy''': Oh, Christ.
:'''John Sr.''': Now, let me tell you something my cock still functions and this broad thinks I'm funny and I get to bang her for free.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': ''[after rescuing Sully, who's dressed in female fetish clothing]'' All the angels and saints.
:'''Franco''': Holy shit.
:'''Mike''': Is that Sully? ''[Sean checks, sees that it is, and jumps up and away from him instantly]''
:'''Chief Reilly''': Blessed screaming Jesus on a whole wheat goddamn cracker.
:'''Sean''': Okay, I think I'm gonna puke.
:'''Sully''': Wait, guys let me explain.
:'''Lou''': Go ahead, man. We're all ears.
:'''Sully''': ''[laughs]'' Oh, who am I kiddin', right? I like to dress up like a chick, okay? I like to wear panties and high heels and... rough sex.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': This is the big emergency that you had me come over and help you with?
:'''Sheila''': Yeah. An emotional emergency.
:'''Tommy''': Do me a favor: Next time call the hormone hot line.
:''[Paulie beeps the horn from in the truck]''
:'''Sheila''': Hey, retard! I got neighbors.
:'''Paulie''': Sorry!
:'''Tommy''': ''[to Sheila]'' He really is retarded.
:'''Sheila''': Really?
:'''Tommy''': Yeah.
:'''Sheila''': ''[to Paulie]'' Sorry!
:'''Paulie''': What?
:'''Tommy''': Shut up! ''[to Sheila]'' You know, I have to go to work, I have to drop him off blah blah blah.
:'''Sheila''': Oh, I'm sorry. Am I an inconvenience to you? Oh, yeah. I must be a big fat inconvenience to you. ''[Tommy starts walking towards his truck]'' Right? Unless of course you've got no place to go or you're lonely or you're looking for some place to park your cock.
:'''Tommy''': Talk to you later.
:'''Sheila''': Oh that's perfect. There's a picture I can't get enough of. You walking away. Hey, you have no responsibility here, too bad you're not married, you don't have to handle it right? You big pussy! ''[starts crying and Tommy starts his truck]''
:'''Tommy''': You got a girlfriend, Paulie? ''[Paulie shakes his head]'' I think I'm the retarded one.

=== ''Twat (aka &amp;#!&amp;)'' [2.04] ===

:'''Mickey''': I used to hear voices the first two months I was sober. Sometimes I thought, you know, it was like God; sometimes it was Satan.
:'''Tommy''': Two months?
:'''Mickey''': Yep. God was tellin' me I was a worthless piece of shit, Satan's tellin' me I'm God's gift.
:'''Tommy''': What did God sound like?
:'''Mickey''': Tom Hanks.
:'''Tommy''': Figures.
:'''Mickey''': Satan was a doubleheader: one minute, he's like Jack Nicholson; the next, you know, like Hillary.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': ''[to Laura]'' The point is this we all use every ethnic and personal slogan in the book against each other. You name it we say it.
:'''Tommy''': It's true. Cock-breath.
:'''Franco''': Shithead.
:'''Sean''': Asswipe.
:'''Mike''': Numb nuts.
:'''Tommy''': Ball brains.
:'''Franco''': Shit for brains.
:'''Sean''': Dipshit.
:'''Mike''': Pussy.
:'''Tommy''': Prick.
:'''Franco''': Dick.
:'''Sean''': Scumbag.
:'''Tommy''': Dick face.
:'''Franco''': Ape ass.
:'''Mike''': Ape face.
:'''Tommy''': Pencil dick, tight ass, needle dick.
:'''Franco''': Yeah. And that's not even getting into any of the gay stuff.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': Laura, we call each other names all the time it's like, you know, what do you call it?
:'''Mike''': Name calling?
:'''Sean''': No, it's like ball busting but more-- more--
:'''Tommy''': Camaraderie.
:'''Sean''': No... no.
:'''Franco''': It's part of being on the team, you know, you joke around. You jive, you cut.
:'''Laura''': I never sit around with my girlfriends and call them a twat. I was on the basketball team in high school. I was on the girl's softball team in college and I never called any of those women a twat. You know why? Because every woman I've ever met finds that word offensive. Not as offensive as the other word but in a race you know, they're like neck and neck.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, but now you work in a job with men. A highly-populated job by men, so now you gotta cut the men you work with a little slack.
:'''Mike''': I thought the word that women hated most was the &quot;C&quot; word.
:'''Sean''': Yeah. I thought they invented &quot;twat&quot; so no one would ever have to say the other word ever again.
:'''Laura''': I think men invented both and never bothered to check with women about either.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief Reilly''': ''[about Laura]'' Franco, you're not messin' around with her are you?
:'''Franco''': What're you nuts? She's not even my type.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Franco, she's got two tits, a pussy and she's breathin'.
:'''Franco''': Okay, so my taste in women has a wide set of parameters.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': ''[On the phone]'' Oh, let me get this straight, you quit drinking but you're going around beatin' up cops? The city was safer when you were a drunk.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. Blow me.

=== ''Sensitivity'' [2.05] ===

:'''Don Kleinman''': Okay, you think you're prejudiced?
:'''Tommy''': Yep.
:'''Don Kleinman''': Against who?
:'''Tommy''': Chevy Neons that cost 12 grand to buy but have 8,000 dollar paint jobs and have 9 Spicks inside of them smokin' weed. That's one thing.
:'''Don Kleinman''': Now the term Spick--
:'''Franco''': It's okay, I'm a Spick.
:'''Don Kleinman''': Well, see that's not really th---
:'''Tommy''': Crazy chink broads that really don't know how to drive in the first place but now they have cell phones stuck to their ears while their doin' 65 MPH down 5th Avenue, huh, right? Crazy chinks on bikes who have 10 pounds of Chinese food strapped to the handle bars.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': You see, that's another thing. Puerto Ricans even get shafted when it comes to racial slurs. Chinks have what, like four? We have one-- Spick. That's it. The Irish they got, mick, patty, donkey. The Italians they got guinea, wop, dago.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, and spaghetti-bender.
:'''Franco''': Ah, spaghetti-bender went out of style during Sinatra's first marriage.
:'''Mike''': Greaseball.
:'''Franco''': Yeah, greaseball. There you have it; that's four.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, and the same thing with the Jews, right? Heeb, kike, Jew boy, Benny.
:'''Franco''': Shylock.
:'''Tommy''': That's five.
:'''Franco''': Black people, forget about it. Spear-Chucker, jungle bunny, raisin head, porch monkeys.
:'''Lou''': Spook.
:'''Sean''': Tar baby.
:'''Franco''': Yeah. It's endless, totally unfair. ''[Don Kleinman just looks at them, totally mortified]'' What?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Don Kleinman''': ''[After watching a sensitivity video]'' Now, what did we learn from that?
:'''Tommy''': Uh, that only white people can be racist?
:'''Don Kleinman''': That wasn't the point of the video.
:'''Tommy''': Well, it's pretty obvious. Where are the black guys callin' white people crackers, huh? Where were the Mexicans shittin' all over the Puerto Ricans? You know? Where were all the chinks who hate the Japs, who hate the Koreans who hate-- ''[Don trys to interrupt him but Tommy keeps going]'' This is bullshit. This is just to cover the FDNY's ass, that's all this is good for. Just in case some Puerto Rican woman or some fat Chinese guy files a [[lawsuit]] against the FDNY or God help us there's another disgruntled female firefighter who thinks she has a case. The FDNY can say &quot;No, no, no, they can't be prejudice, they took this horseshit sensitivity training.&quot; Let me tell you somethin'. The next time I run into a burning building and refuse to bring out anybody who's not the same color as me, then that's when you can bring my angry, pink, sober, Irish, ass back down here. Got it? I'm gonna go out for a smoke! (door slams)

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': Are you outta your mind, huh? Did mom know?
:'''John Sr.''': If your mother knew we wouldn't be having this conversation because I'd be dead somewhere in some river with my balls in my mouth. ''[mocking Johnny]'' &quot;Did mom know?&quot;
:'''Tommy''': You know the guy's almost the same age as me, right? He's like a couple weeks younger. I mean how long were you seein' this broad?
:'''John Sr.''': Uh... oh, about 36 years.
:'''Johnny''': What? You were having an affair for 36 years?
:'''John Sr.''': What can I tell you? When it comes to adultery I'm a one woman man.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Hey kid, my dreams are all filled up with Candice Bergen, a chocolate wheelchair and the Olsen Twins.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I've had the same dream. Except its Carly Simon and a big tub of chunky peanut butter.
:'''Tommy''': Why chunky?
:'''Chief Reilly''': Better traction.

=== ''Reunion'' [2.06] ===

:'''Colleen''': I am never getting married and I am never getting pregnant.
:'''Tommy''': Well you just made your dad a very happy man, sweetheart. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': Tommy, when you're in jail in some hick town, and you're taking it up the ass from Otis the drunk, don't call me. Don't call me, you'll be on your own, bro.
:'''Tommy''': No I won't. I'll have Otis.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mike''': ''[about his tall girlfriend]'' Well, you never met her how do you know she's gigantic?
:'''Lou''': Well, I was on my way to work and I saw her swatting planes away from The Empire State Building. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': So, you're not in jail yet?
:'''Tommy''': No. Why would I be in jail? Except for maybe killing you, which I would right now, except it would interrupt my smoke.

=== ''Shame'' [2.07] ===

:'''Tommy''': Steak and ice cream?
:'''Uncle Teddy''': It's my latest invention, beef-stash-eo. I called the people at Ben &amp; Jerry's but they said &quot;no.&quot; Some people have no vision.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sean quietly sits down beside Lou]''
:'''Lou''': What?
:'''Sean''': Well, it's my cock.
:'''Lou''': Oh, forget I asked.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': It's like my dick is some sort of weapon of mass destruction.
:'''Lou''': Okay, first of all. Your dick is not a weapon of mass destruction because if it were I would be in complete awe of you, which I am not. But there are really two issues here Sean. The first pertains to the fact that you have a tiny fragment of brain matter lodged somewhere in your skull. No offense.
:'''Sean''': None taken.
:'''Lou''': Second is your dating pool. Which in my opinion, should be drained, filled in, and black topped over. Maybe even a playground for poor kids built on top.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Now, the only problem is that she wants to see me out with my imaginary girlfriend. I'm done for.
:'''Tommy''': Nah, not necessarily. Situations like this, this is why God invented whores.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': What, are you drinking all day now?
:'''John Sr.''': I'm 82. I'm retired, and I'm married to a new and much younger woman who's not only rich but likes to bang my brains out at least 3 times a week. So I'm not drinking kid. I'm in a perpetual toast. 

=== ''Believe'' [2.08] ===

:'''Tommy''': ''[on the phone]'' Hey, you backstabbin' son of a bitch.
:'''Johnny''': Oh, hey, Tom.
:'''Tommy''': You're supposed to be my brother, asshole.
:'''Johnny''': I am your brother. I was just tryin' to do you a favor.
:'''Tommy''': By helpin' Janet take my kids again? That's supposed to be doin' me a favor? How's that work?
:'''Johnny''': Tommy, if you would just listen to her. 
:'''Tommy''': You know what, Johnny? You're dead to me. You're dead to me. You got that?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Janet''': I don't wanna go to court.
:'''Tommy''': You try takin' these kids away from me again--
:'''Janet''': I don't wanna take them again. You know this whole thing? I didn't get angry, I got sad. My whole head went back to when we first met... Our wedding, how funny you were, Colleen being born. Those Beatles songs that you used to sing to her to make her fall asleep. Those sweet little horse-clown pictures that you used to draw for Katy. (Janet starts crying) You know Tommy, I couldn't even move for almost a day, and then I couldn't stop crying. I need my kids. But at least three or four times a day when I had them Connor and Katy would look at me and ask where you were. &quot;Is Daddy coming for the weekend?&quot; &quot;Is Daddy coming for Christmas.&quot; &quot;Where's Daddy now?&quot; &quot;Is Daddy dead, you would tell us if Daddy died, right mom?&quot; I was in a hospital for a couple of weeks. But I uh got some counseling. And I got back up on my feet. The thing is while I was there, I got my head straightened out enough that I got a little perspective. I think for the sake of the kids, and from what we used to be like, before Jimmy died. I think we oughta give it one last go.
:'''Tommy''': One last go? That's a hell of a way to jump start a relationship.
:'''Janet''': Until death do us part, right?
:'''Tommy''': Right.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': ''[after a river rescue]'' Oh, Jesus, my skin smells like it's rotting.
:'''Lou''': Yeah, why don't you bottle that and call it &quot;essence of ass.&quot;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[They are outside the Chief's house at his party, looking inside at all the gay guys]''
:'''Lou''': Probie, get in there and get us some booze.
:'''Mike''': Why me?
:'''Tommy''': Because you can probably slip under the gaydar.
:'''Mike''': Me? What about Sean?
:'''Tommy''': If we were to have the gayest lookin' guy in the crew contest, you win, hands down.
:'''Lou''': Or pants down as the case may be.
:'''Sean''': What does that mean? He has better hair than me? Better body? Better what?
:'''Tommy''': You're really not asking me that question right now are ya?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sean is a little drunk]''
:'''Mike''': Hey, man, straighten up. There two hot chicks in a party full of gay guys. It's like catching fish in a barrel.
:'''Sean''': ''[pauses]'' It's shooting fish. 
:'''Mike''': What?
:'''Sean''': It's shooting fish in a barrel. That's the expression, you dumbass.
:'''Mike''': Yeah but if they're in the barrel, why would you shoot 'em? Why wouldn't you just reach in with your hands and pull one out?

=== ''Rebirth'' [2.09] ===

:'''Lou''': ''[about Janet]'' She's either the world's greatest actress or she's on drugs.
:'''Tommy''': What I can't be funny?
:'''Lou''': Not to her. Not in years. Unless of course it's a brain tumor. But you wanna know somethin' with all the shit that's gone down between the two of ya in the last five years let alone for her to be laughin' at your jokes, it's gotta be a tumor the size of a goddamn grapefruit.
:'''Tommy''': I don't think it's a tumor, okay?
:'''Lou''': Well, then we have option number three.
:'''Tommy''': Which is what?
:'''Lou''': Goof balls.
:'''Tommy''': Goof balls?
:'''Lou''': Pills. They have pills for everything now. Stop smoking, pay attention, blah blah blah. I bet my right nut that she's one of those brand new, I hate my husband, I hate my life, my vagina hurts, please just take it all away that kinda thing. Take two a day and not only is your asshole husband funny but you might wanna bang his lying, deceitful, cheatin' little brains out. No offense, Tommy.
:'''Tommy''': None taken.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': It's not a thingy, Sean! It's a step. And you're supposed to make amends for your own personal bullshit not mine! Tellin' Laura I was bangin' the nurse, that's one thing. Tellin' the whole crew that I was bangin' Laura, Sean, that's like a whole new level of retardation. That is like the special Olympics of substance abuse.
:'''Sean''': Well, I was drunk.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[Franco wants to write Laura a poem]'' No, no, listen to me, listen to me. I don't care who we're talkin' about-- young chick, old chick, in-between chick, Cindy Crawford on her best damn day-- they all think their ass is fat, okay? We love the ass. We all think the ass is like a festival of fun. It's a place to go, chock-full of stuff we can to do, but to them, the ass is death. Gravity and death and hard goddamn times. Stay away from the ass, okay? Go with the tits. Tits, eyelashes, eyes. All right? That's it. ''[Lou looks at him]'' What?
:'''Lou''': You write a poem about tits, she's gonna rip it up and shove it down your throat. Chicks wanna hear about emotions, they wanna hear about remorse, they wanna hear I'm sorry's up the goddamn ying-yang.
:'''Tommy''': So you write a poem that says I'm sorry, blah blah blah. I regret bing bang boom. And then you throw in a &quot;Hey, I like your nice beautiful tits.&quot; ''[Lou stares at him]'' What?
:'''Lou''': Emotions.
:'''Tommy''': Tits.
:'''Lou''': Remorse.
:'''Tommy''': Melons.
:'''Lou''': I'm sorry.
:'''Tommy''': Gazungas.
:'''Lou''': I love you.
:'''Tommy''': Double peaches of pleasure.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Lou''': Around here, we got the probie, he controls all the homo retard crap, okay? Garrity covers all the stupid retard bullshit. Franco is our pussy man. You control all the drinkin' and the fire hero worship crap. Poetry is my territory, you're musclin' in on my turf.
:'''Tommy''': You need to take some kinda chill pill because you're very upset--
:'''Lou''': Lemme ask you somethin' else. Where were the tits?
:'''Tommy''': Where were the tits?
:'''Lou''': All week long in the poem! ''[mocking him]'' It's gotta have tits. Gotta love tits. It needs tits, it needs tits. 14 goddamn lines, not one tit.
:'''Tommy''': It was implied.
:'''Lou''': Oh, it was implied?
:'''Tommy''': Yes, in subtext.
:'''Lou''': It was subtext. Subtext, my ass. What are you Walt goddamn Whitman all of a sudden? The Tommy Gavin I know would never write that poem. The Tommy Gavin I know would never write that poem to seduce his own piece of ass let alone his buddy's. You wanna know something? This, the fall you just took, the dancing, the singing, the cleaning, the la-la-la, what the hell are you on?

=== ''Brains'' [2.10] ===

:'''Sean''': Hey, maybe I can help.
:'''Chief Reilly''': Yeah, and I can grow a vagina.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': You call up and you tell them what kind of service you want, what kind of hours you need and they send over a bunch of nurses.
:'''Chief Reilly''': I only need one.
:'''Sean''': I know, but that's like the fun of it. They send over a bunch and you choose one. It's like ''[[w:American Idol|American Idol]]'', you know, except it's nurses instead of singers, and you don't get to call up and vote to see who wins, and [[w:Paula Abdul|Paula Abdul]]'s not there acting like a freak show. Actually it's not like ''American Idol'' at all.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': ''[to Tommy, on the way to donate blood]'' You might wanna pick up someone else's blood on the way. Yours is probably still flammable.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Tommy''': ''[After they donated blood]'' I just feel really light headed. You don't have anymore juice, do ya?
:'''Johnny''': You almost fell getting off the table, you pussy.
:'''Tommy''': I got up too fast, okay? And you should watch your language in front of the house of God. Back me up on that.
:'''Father Murphy''': He's right.
:'''Johnny''': Sorry.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah, asshole.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': You give that guy a bad nose job, a ranch with some rides on it and Liz Taylor's home number, you're looking at Michael Jackson my friend.
:'''Tommy''': Okay, first of all he's our half brother, okay? So if he's Michael Jackson, you know who that makes us? That makes me Tito and that makes you Jermaine
:'''Johnny''': Why do I gotta be Jermaine?
:'''Tommy''': Cause I'm Tito.

=== ''Bitch'' [2.11] ===

:''[After Tommy just drank orange juice that had pulp in it]''
:'''Janet''': Since when do you hate pulp?
:'''Tommy''': Ever since they started takin' the time to take the goddamn pulp out. Since then, okay?
:'''Janet''': Honey, I'm sorry. I didn't know you had a thing with the pulp.
:'''Tommy''': Yeah. I hate all pulp. I hate orange juice pulp. I hate that stupid British band named Pulp. Pulp Fiction. Quentin Tarantino, what's with that goddamn head by the way. Is that not the biggest head in the history of heads? He turns sideways it's like you're lookin' at a map of the New Jersey coastline. And Kill Bill what a piece of shit. And then there's a Kill Bill 2 what's that about? Jesus Christ.
:'''Janet''': Tommy, the kids.
:'''Tommy''': Kids, when you grow up don't see either one of the Kill Bill's they both suck, okay?
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': Oh, shit. Sean Garrity readin' a book. That's the first sign of the apocalypse. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Chief''': ''[seeing Sean and Mike play Scrabble]'' Look at this: A meeting of the minds and the minds are a no-show. 
:'''Tommy''': ''[looking at the Scrabble board]'' Hmm. &quot;Tag.&quot; &quot;Arm.&quot; &quot;It.&quot; &quot;Go.&quot; That's great guys.
:'''Laura''': Why even bother keepin' score?
:'''Mike''': ''[placing tiles on the board]'' F-E-L-L. Read it and weep.
:'''Sean''': Oh, shit. How many points? ''[Sean and Mike just stare at each other, Mike takes a little time to figure it out]''
:'''Mike''': Eight.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Franco''': I don't know if I can believe you or not, Tom. See the Tommy Gavin I used to know was a lyin', cheatin', schemin', brawlin', skirt-chasin' son of a bitch. I looked up to him. You always knew where he stood, but this new Tommy, this, uh, fancy coffee-drinkin', pastry-eatin', kind, sweet, sincere one, uh-uh, Bro, I don't trust him as far as I can throw him.

=== ''Happy'' [2.12]  ===

:'''Uncle Teddy''': You mean to tell me she's leaving 60 million dollars to the goddamn cats?!
:'''Lawyer''': And the cancer foundation.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': I got cancer.
:'''Tommy''': You do?
:'''Lawyer''': Cat cancer.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': Hey, I've--I've been thinkin' about your nuts. And I think it's gonna be okay. I mean, look at Lance Armstrong. He turned out really well.
:'''Mike''': Yeah, was that before or after he landed on the moon?
:'''Sean''': No, Lance Armstrong. The guy who won the Tour de France like 26 times in a row. (Mike is silent) Whoa, holy shit, bro you don't even know what the Tour de France is, do you?
:'''Mike''': I want to say wine tasting?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Maggie''': I figured you and me we always had a special bond. Backed each other up.
:'''Tommy''': I know. I know.
:'''Maggie''': I figure the only reason that you like me is because I'm the only person the family hates worse than you.
:'''Tommy''': There might be a sliver of truth to that. But you know I love you and Johnny likes you.
:'''Maggie''': Oh, don't pump sunshine up my ass Tommy. Johnny is scared shitless of me. Always was.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Michael''': I haven't seen you in many, many years. Peggie Sue. I hardly reconized you.
:'''Maggie''': You know what? Why do you gotta call me that name? I hate that name. My name's Maggie.
:'''Michael''': It's the name your mother and I gave you.
:'''Maggie''': I don't care. It's a stupid name. Just because you and mom were a Buddy Holley fan doesn't mean I gotta be stuck with that stupid name for the rest of my life.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': ''[gasps]'' You banged my sweet cousin, Angie?
:'''Franco''': No.
:'''Sean''': Oh, Jesus.
:'''Franco''': I banged your sister.
:'''Sean''': Missy? Franco she was like 17.
:'''Franco''': I know. I waited a year.

=== ''Justice'' [2.13]  ===

:'''Michael''': I'm an old man. So they put me in jail. That could be two weeks for all we know.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': That could be one week.
:'''Michael''': Thanks, asshole.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': Look, you're not doing this, if this goes down, I'm the shooter.
:'''Michael''': I had first dibs.
:'''Tommy''': Did you just say dibs?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': Seriously, this whole Katy thing is freaking me out. I can't shake it.
:'''Lou''': So you believe in heaven?
:'''Sean''': Of course.
:'''Lou''': With people standing around on clouds all day?
:'''Sean''': Well, yeah.
:'''Lou''': With wings?
:'''Sean''': We---I don't know about wings. That seems a little stupid.
:'''Lou''': But people standing around all day on water vapor. That's perfectly reasonable?
:'''Sean''': Look, all I'm saying is that there is a heaven, okay? I've always believe that. What it is exactly, that's up to each individual person. You know? Like, my heaven, for example, I mean, there's clouds.
:'''Lou''': We've established that. 
:'''Sean''': But there's a lot of downtime, y'know? And you can play video games all day. Oh, and the best part is, if you, like want a Mountain Dew or somethin', you don't have to go and get it and open the can, y'know? You just-- You think it, and then taste just...appears in you mouth, and you're quenched. You know, your thirst.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Sean''': ''[After talking to Katy]'' You had to be there, Lou. It was eerie.
:'''Mike''': Yeah spooky. Like in horror movies where the little girl's a total freak and kills everyone in the end. 
:'''Sean''': Yeah, and the way she was talking, uh, and her eyes. She didn't blink the entire time that we were with her.
:'''Mike''': She didn't. I was watching.
:'''Lou''': You know, guys, she's a little girl whose brother just died. She's dealing with it. 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''[Sean and Mike enter Katy's room while she's sitting on her bed drawing on a pad using crayons.]'' 
:'''Sean''': Hi.
:'''Katy''': Hi.
:'''Sean''': How are you doing? (He walks towards the bed and sits down next to Katy.)
:'''Katy''': I miss my brother.
:'''Sean''': Yeah, yeah, I bet. But you know what, Katy? You just- ah- you just gotta remember that you're gonna- see him again... someday. You know, up in heaven. 
:''[Katy is silent.]''
:'''Sean whispers to Mike''': You want to help me out here, say something? Say something. Say something!
:'''Mike''': Um, you see, Katy, um, where he is right now, there is no pain. He is happy. And he doesn't remember anything about the accident. God makes that all go away.
:'''Sean''': Is that true?
:'''Mike''': That's what I heard.
:'''Sean''': Wow. Wow. 
:''[They turn their attention back to Katy.]'' 
:'''Sean''': Listen Katy, you gotta know that Connor is fine and he's being taken care of, and you're going to see him again.&quot; 
:'''Katy''': No, I won't.
:'''Sean''': Yes, you will, sweetie, I promise. 
:'''Katy''': No, I won't. Because there is no heaven.
:'''Mike''': Of course there's a heaven, honey. 
:'''Katy''': Prove it.
:''[Mike and Sean glance at each other and whisper something.]''
:'''Sean''': Um... See, y-you just have to... believe. 
:'''Katy''': I do believe. I believe there is no heaven, just as there is no god. Human beings know he doesn't exist. We need to feel special, more special than animals and bugs. Because we are scared. We need to think there is someone out there protecting us, watching over us. We're nothing. We come from dirt, and we go back into the dirt.
:'''Mike''': See ya. (He quickly gets up and leaves.)
:'''Sean''': Listen, Katy-
:'''Katy''': Can you please leave me alone now?&quot;
:'''Sean''': Absolutely. (He gets up and leave.)

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Johnny''': ''[About Tommy]''I hope to Christ he doesn't fall off the wagon.
:'''Uncle Teddy''': I wouldn't blame the guy if he drove the wagon right through the liquor store window and drank the entire inventory.

[[Category:Rescue Me seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>5nrk5mm91wsteoebek0ed3yp75nk9fj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Balaraba Ramat Yakubu</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>243524</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964873</id>
      <parentid>3963553</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:01:21Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ojewuyib</username>
        <id>3173331</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */ #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964873</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5384" sha1="nok12lgpj5pnua4mtw67ickzu984zku" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Juyin Sarauta Abuja.jpg|thumb|Juyin Sarauta Abuja in 2018]]

'''[[w:Balaraba Ramat Yakubu|Balaraba Ramat Yakubu]]''' (born 1959) is a [[Nigeria]]n author who writes in [[w:Hausa language|Hausa]]. She is a leader in the genre of &quot;love literature&quot;, and one of the very few Hausa-language writers whose work has been translated into English. She has also worked as a screenwriter, producer, and director of '''[[w:Hausa-language_cinema|Kannywood]]''' films. Her stories have focused on issues such as forced marriages and women's education.

==Quotes==
* Majority of people that messed up their lives end up becoming wasted... There are exceptions though... So I am not the one punishing men in my novels, life treats them accordingly. 
**[https://couplesofvirtuesandvalues.com/promoting-family-values%EF%BB%BF-balaraba-ramat-yakubu-forced-into-marriage-at-age-13-years-took-charge-of-her-future/] Balarabe answering questions on her characters.

* There have been more than 70 studies done on my books at various levels of education-NCE, Bachelors, Masters, Diploma etc. Many of these students are fascinated that Hausa writers have such great ideas... This is great that we contribute in positive ways to our society’s attitudinal change and by extension national development. Writers are diamonds. We crystalize societies. 
**[https://dailytrust.com/amp/writers-are-diamonds-says-balaraba-ramat-yakubu &quot;Writers are diamonds says Balaraba Ramat Yakubu&quot;].

* I am not disputing the fact that some writers have crossed boundaries in their writings. Yes, some have gone the extra mile to be explicit. That is very, very wrong. I hope they will stop one day. But why are people only worried about Hausa novels? What about the English and other literature in which many things that shouldn’t be told are written bare! I advise parental control over reading. 
**[https://dailytrust.com/amp/writers-are-diamonds-says-balaraba-ramat-yakubu] Balarabe answering questions on Hausa writers corrupting the north.

* We are Muslims and we have rules in Islam for marriage and so on. But sometimes, our culture dominates the religious dictates and culture and religion are different. So, I fight because I want to stress that culture and religion are different. Probably that is why I'm called a controversial writer. 
**[https://www.modernghana.com/nollywood/2557/i-write-in-hausa-cos-i-didnt-get-western-educati.html &quot;I write in Hausa ‘cos I didn’t get Western education&quot;]

* ...I tackle issues that some people and writers are afraid to talk about. Before, some old people like my mother's age mates think that their husbands are second to their God but I let them know that their husband is their mate, friend and whatever. Before, it was not like that and because that belief is still dominant in the northern states, whenever you touch that area, men don't like it. 
**[https://www.modernghana.com/nollywood/2557/i-write-in-hausa-cos-i-didnt-get-western-educati.html] Balarabe on being a controversial writer.

* I don't buy the idea of early marriage because I had to push myself to understand the little English I'm speaking with you. If I hadn't pushed myself, I wouldn't have understood any English. I really desire our daughters in the North to be well educated. I have only two daughters and I want them to have quality education.
**[https://www.modernghana.com/nollywood/2557/i-write-in-hausa-cos-i-didnt-get-western-educati.html] Balarabe Ramat Yakubu responding on why she advocates for formal education for girls in the North.
*&quot;When I write, I feel lifted. I grew up with a strong father whom I could not confront. My books gave me a window to express myself. I write my stories as if I was in your house, or at your neighbours'. Women recognise them. I feel I have an obligation to society to tell those stories that otherwise would not have been told.&quot; 
*https://www-aljazeera-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/www.aljazeera.com/amp/features/2016/3/8/from-illiterate-child-bride-to-famous-nigerian-novelist?amp_gsa=1&amp;amp_js_v=a9&amp;usqp=mq331AQIUAKwASCAAgM%3D#amp_ct=1783807397487&amp;amp_tf=From%20%251%24s&amp;aoh=17838073850866&amp;referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&amp;ampshare=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.aljazeera.com%2Ffeatures%2F2016%2F3%2F8%2Ffrom-illiterate-child-bride-to-famous-nigerian-novelist

==Quotes about Balaraba Ramat Yakubu==
* Just as Yakubu fought her way to getting an education and becoming a successful writer, she isn’t one to wait for ideal writing conditions. 
**[https://brittlepaper.com/2016/03/writes-kitchen-car-phone-balaraba-yakubu-guerilla-writing-moves/ &quot;Balaraba R. Yakubu Writes in the Kitchen, in the Car, on Her Phone | A Lesson for Aspiring Writers&quot;]

* We are talking about a woman who realized early on in life that she had to be improvisational in her approach to life. In spite of a really rough start, she went on to help invent the Soyyaya literary phenomenon. 
**[https://www.aljazeera.com/features/2016/3/8/from-illiterate-child-bride-to-famous-nigerian-novelist Al-Jazeera feature - &quot;From illiterate child bride to famous Nigerian novelist&quot;]

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Commons}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Yakubu, Balaraba Ramat}}
[[Category:Women authors from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Screenwriters from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Film directors from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Film producers from Nigeria]]
[[Category:1959 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>nok12lgpj5pnua4mtw67ickzu984zku</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Helon Habila</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>243962</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964973</id>
      <parentid>3554874</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:03:11Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964973</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9390" sha1="ritxf2ttcp39q2znpqo9cf5ucf8h0ea" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Helon Habila5.jpg|thumb|Helon Habila in 2009]]
'''[[w:Helon Habila|Helon Habila Ngalabak]]''' (born November 1967) is a Nigerian novelist and poet.

==Quotes==
=== ''[[w:Waiting for an Angel|Waiting for an Angel]]'' (2002) ===
* A mob wielding cudgels and cutlasses is hot on the heels of a youthwho desperately crosses to the other side of the road, narrowlymissing the fender of a truck. The mob follows growing bigger asit goes. The youth, looking over his shoulder as he runs, crashesinto a light pole and falls senseless to the ground. Before he canregain a second wind the mob is on him. I watch the cudgels riseand fall; I hear his wailing ululating screams finally turn into awhimper. They poured petrol on him and set him ablaze
** Page 35-36

* The students, who should have been busy taking theirbaths and getting set for lectures, sat idly...discussing the boycottof lectures
** Page 39-40

* More than once ourtaxi was forced to hug the kerb as siren blaring military jeepspassed at top speed...”
** Page 43

* There had been an accident. Bola’s family-father, mother, and twosisters had been in a car crash. It was late in the evening...theywere on their way to Ibadan for a visit...The father driving hadfailed to see the truck laying on its side in the middle of the road.It was a military truck carrying the furniture of an officer ontransfer from Lagos to Ibadan. The father and mother, who were in front, had died instantly; Peju, the elder sister, died on the way to the hospital; the other sister, Lola, sustained minor injuries
**  Page 45

* Look out there, see the long queue of cars waiting for fuel. Someof them have been there for three days...And we are a majorproducer of oil
** Page 84

* The houses were old and craggy and lichened. The place had theunfinished, abandoned appearance of an under waterscape.Crouching under the bigger or in their own clusters were hastilybuilt wood and zinc structures that housed an incredibly largenumber of families: the fathers were mostly out-of-work drivers,laborers, fugitives convalescing between prison terms
** Page 97

* We don finally reach the end of the road. We don dey together since I was born, but now time don come wey me and you must part. Bye-bye.Goodnight. Ka chi foo. Oda ro. Sai gobe 
** Pages 97-98

* Hagar takes to prostitution whenrejection and hunger look her straight in the face
** Page 114

* Look, we are living under siege. Their very presence on our streetsand in the government house instead of the barrack where theybelong is an act of aggression. They hold us cowed with guns sothat they will steal our money—they will continue subjugating uskilling all dissenters one by one, sending them to exile till there isno competitor left to oppose them. 
** Page 122-123

* We came to tell you sir, that our clinic is run-down and abandoned.We came to tell you that we don’t have a single borehole onMorgan street... we are here to protest against this neglect--- weare dying from diseases. We are dying from a lack of hope. Andthat is why we are here today to protest. And this is the way wefeel we ought to express our displeasure 
** Page 131- 132

===''[[w:Oil on Water|Oil on Water]]'' (2010) ===

* &quot;You must take a year off, one of these days, before you’re old and tired and weighed down by responsibility. Go away somewhere, and read. Read all the important books. Educate yourself, then you’ll see the world in a different way.&quot; 

* &quot;Can you continue to love a person regardless of such shortcomings? Maybe because you hope to save them? Or because you can't help it? Isn't that what love is all about?&quot;

* &quot;Our job is to find out the truth, even if it is buried deep in the earth.&quot;

* &quot;The further from home you wander, the closer you get to Siberia.&quot;

* Nostalgia settled on my shoulders like the arm of a long-lost friend, urging me to look back and listen; it had been years since I heard such morning sounds, such silence.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* I've seen children snatched away from their mothers, never to be reunited. I've seen husbands taken from their wives and kids and sent away to prison. I've seen grown men flogged by soldiers in front of their kids. That's how history is made, and it's our job to witness it.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* Our job is to find out the truth, even if it is buried deep in the earth
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

=== ''[[w:Travelers (novel)|Travelers]]'' (2019) ===
* There is no loneliness like the loneliness of a stranger in a strange city.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* Not all of us have that luxury, of a past. My history doesn't offer me much in that respect.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* Our story is over, the ink has dried, each of us must move on now and it will be as if we had never met, never loved, and never dreamt together.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* I didn't love him. He was a good, decent guy, but I wanted more at that time.&quot; She shrugged. &quot;I was not so young anymore. Time was passing for me. I wanted more… excitement.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* Sometimes poets have to be imperfect so their poetry can be perfect.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* Happiness is important, but I wouldn't say it is the main purpose of human existence.
** [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/65256488-travelers#:~:text=There%20is%20no%20loneliness%20like,stranger%20in%20a%20strange%20city.&amp;text=Not%20all%20of%20us%20have,me%20much%20in%20that%20respect.&amp;text=Our%20story%20is%20over%2C%20the,loved%2C%20and%20never%20dreamt%20together.]

* &quot;I don't see myself as a spokesperson for Africa. I am simply a writer trying to write about people and about themes that interest me.&quot;
** [https://www.litmagazine.org/interview-with-helon-habila-by-lavonne-roberts/ On writing about Africa]

* &quot;Writing is a very lonely business, so a prize sort of shows one that one is not working in a vacuum.&quot;
** [https://punchng.com/i-cant-imagine-being-anything-other-than-a-writer-helon-habila/ Reflecting on literary awards]

* &quot;It is not about prizes, it is about the work.&quot;
** [https://punchng.com/i-cant-imagine-being-anything-other-than-a-writer-helon-habila/ Speaking on literary recognition]

* &quot;The African novel is a hybrid form. It is a combination of the African folkloric tradition with the western novel form.&quot;
** [https://blueprint.ng/i-write-to-protest-habila/ Speaking on African literature]

* &quot;I write to protest.&quot;
** [https://blueprint.ng/i-write-to-protest-habila/ On the purpose of his writing]

* &quot;There is a tendency, especially in the West, to look at African writing as all about war and famine and refugees. But literature is supposed to show you life in a more balanced way.&quot;
** [https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/books/features/helon-habila-in-search-of-africa-s-angels-435559.html Speaking on perceptions of African literature]

* &quot;Like most people I am simply exhausted by politics.&quot;
** [https://rpublc.com/october-november-2022/first-draft-helon-habila/ Reflecting on politics and writing]

==External links==
*https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/13653793-oil-on-water

{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT: Habila, Helon}}

[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Short story writers]]
[[Category:Writers]]
[[Category:1967 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Poets]]</text>
      <sha1>ritxf2ttcp39q2znpqo9cf5ucf8h0ea</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sefi Atta</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>243963</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964975</id>
      <parentid>3910367</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:08:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964975</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="16736" sha1="qea1mafhot5vfa9lawvhzxd6o4b2b0h" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Sefi Atta 2021.jpg|thumb|Sefi Atta 2021]]
'''[[w:Sefi Atta|Sefi Atta]]''' (born January 1964) is a prize-winning Nigerian-American novelist, short-story writer, playwright and screenwriter. Her books have been translated into many languages, radio plays have been broadcast by the BBC, and her stage plays have been performed internationally. Awards she has received include the 2006 Wole Soyinka Prize for Literature in Africa and the 2009 Noma Award for Publishing in Africa.

==Quotes==
* I don't have much of an imagination, but I have a mind bank of details, which I play with. It's how I daydream, so writing like that is natural for me.
**[http://www.percontra.net/archive/18attainterview.htm/] Speaking in an interview 

* People don’t fear the wind until it fells a tree. Then, they say it’s too much.
**Sefi Atta (2012). “Everything Good Will Come”, p.73, Interlink Publishing

* You don't need attention to write. All you need is passion for your work and an overwhelming desire to tell a story you genuinely care about. Readers can sense your sincerity and it separates you from pretenders.
**[http://www.percontra.net/archive/18attainterview.htm/] Speaking in an interview 

* I never wanted to be a writer; I just had stories I needed to tell.
**[http://www.percontra.net/archive/18attainterview.htm/] Speaking in an interview 

* She drinks her Eva water. Their parents were taken down by cancer, heart attacks and strokes. Respectable diseases.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/133292.Sefi_Atta/] Sefi Atta in her book, A bit of difference

* Most of the children were shoeless and you were confronted with the dilemma that, no matter how much money you had and no matter where you could escape to overseas, you could not save yourself from your own country.
**[https://bukrate.com/quote/1723055/] Sefi Atta's quote p. 134, Madness in the Family.

*I enjoy writing plays most. I haven't written a radio play in a while and I don't write short stories anymore because the process of submitting them depressed me. I really enjoy revising novels, but drafting them can be a pain.
** [https://geosireads.wordpress.com/2013/02/27/interview-with-nigerian-writer-sefi-atta/] Speaking in an interview 

* I get stage fright with short stories . For me it feels like stand up comedy: kill or die. I’m more confident when I begin a novel because I know I have space to fail 
** [https://medium.com/@christopher.mendoza.386/ways-to-be-confident-when-you-feel-stage-fright-e77dcb01f54c] Speaking on stage fright

=== ''[[w:Everything Good Will Come|Everything Good Will Come]]'' (2005) ===
* Cooking was a skill, I thought; an art form. In our country, we appreciated the end result, but not the craft, perhaps because we didn’t have fancy names. Paring was “cut it.” Julienne was “cut it well.” Chopping was “cut it well well,” and so on till you had puree, which would probably be “mash it.” And, if anyone was measuring any ingredient in a kitchen, it meant that they really didn’t know what they were doing.

* It occurred to me that there was nothing more precious than satisfaction. That it was possible to end up committing a crime just because you were contaminated by a little discontent. You could convince yourself that you were satisfied, then someone could come along and say, 'But I can offer you more', and then you could begin to think, My life is not worth much after all. In fact, you could tell yourself, My life was completely worthless from the start. 
** Pg. 247
* History is very important to my work in that regard and thank you for noticing. I’m no expert on Fanon, but I used the quotation as an epigraph because I found it amusing and apt. The bourgeois phase in the history of a country like Nigeria is indeed completely useless, which is why the novel ends as it begins, with middle-class preoccupations, despite the political changeover that occurs in the story.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* The quotation is for those whom it may concern. Our country doesn’t work. We know that. We also know why. What we may not be ready to accept is that progress will continue to elude us so long as we follow trajectories that are alien to us, the most damaging of which are driven by unbridled capitalism. This is not to suggest that a return to our traditional systems is the way forward; I don’t idealise them in the novel.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* Nigeria isn’t exactly a newly industrialised country either, but we have engaged in trading activities for centuries, and have a history of selling people for mere beads. Fast forward to what we have witnessed of late, with our governments selling us down the river by privatising public utilities, and contracting out public services, such as waste management, to foreign companies. Yet we still don’t have regular electricity supply or a clean environment.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* We call that development, but at every traffic light along the way are beggars, most of whom are children and disabled adults. Some are amputees and presumably they are often victims of sharia law punishments. We look away only to see billboards advertising business conferences at mega churches.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* Perhaps living in other countries has given me a different perspective, but for me these are not signs of a country’s progress, by which I mean its advancement towards freedom, justice and equality. The way we are going, I don’t think we’re prepared for the political impacts, social shifts and economic disparities that will come, and we still have no common ideology that unites us more than capitalism does. 
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* Yet it benefits only a minority of us and fails the rest of the country. In fact, it is the underlying cause of our moral failings, and whether or not you care about the welfare of your fellow citizens, being a member of the elite can no longer save you. There is nowhere to hide from the dysfunction, which is why Nigerians who can afford to, escape abroad as often as they can.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* Even activism is for personal gain in Nigeria, so it’s no surprise that nothing improves. Should that happen, activists would be out of business. I am part of the world I complain about, but writing is not business as usual for me. It is an expression of hope that I might, in my small way, play a part in bringing about change. Now, you can’t kill the beast by feeding it, but you can slip poison into its food, which is what I attempt to do by writing honestly. 
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* In this particular novel, the Fanon quotation identifies the process we’re going through and explains our failures so far. What I then do is show we are products of complex pre- and postcolonial systems that determine our orientations. The heart of the story, though, is Remi Lawal’s difficult relationship with Nigeria.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* If anyone says they fit in nicely with the Nigerian upper class, I would have to come to the conclusion that they are thoughtless. No one is responsible for their upbringing and no one deserves to be defined by any social class. My late father was the son and great-grandson of traditional rulers and he attended Oxford University. I often joke that the women in my mother’s family carry themselves as if they are royalty. They are proud of their parents, who worked hard to educate them.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* When I was a child, I was called oniranu a lot at home because I poked fun at people I ought to respect. I was about six years old when I made up a song about a certain Lagos society woman. One line, I remember, said she had rashes, even though she didn’t. I’m still an oniranu at heart. I never grew out of it. In my play Lengths to Which We Go, which you’ve read, I have an aspiring character called Mrs. Babalola who calls herself upper “clarse”.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* In my short story “Unsuitable Ties”, I have a snobbish character called Biola whom I refer to as an authority on class since her early schooling in Switzerland. Characters like these provide comic relief for me. Blame the British as well. They left us with a social construct called class distinction, which makes no sense except to justify the oppression of the majority of Nigerians.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* I suppose the reason I write about the Lagos elite at all is that they don’t become writers. Ikoyi people in particular are underrepresented in Nigerian literature. Ikoyi itself is often described as a place where rich, powerful people live. But when I was growing up there, the people I knew were not unlike those who lived on Victoria Island, and districts on the mainland such as Apapa and Ikeja, and estates such as Alaka and Palmgrove.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* The people who gave Ikoyi a bad name were the ones who rarely allowed other Nigerians into their social circles, except to serve and look up to them. Occasionally they were open to outsiders who had as much money and were equally materialistic. They were self-conscious but not particularly self-examining, and they were afraid to admit their vulnerability. As my protagonist Remi Lawal notes at the Dadas’ cocktail party in the novel, their lives are full of frivolous contradictions and, ultimately, they are replaced from one generation to the next. She is right about that. Ikoyi of 1976 is not the same as it is today. That society is gone now. The band and the song have changed.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* You know, I’ve also been called a Lagos writer and a feminist writer, but I just tell stories that interest me in ways that interest me. Growing up in Ikoyi, I had friends who used drugs. Friends who discovered their fathers had girlfriends, second wives and other children. Friends whose mothers were victims of physical and emotional abuse. Friends whose parents got divorced. I never thought any of those families were dysfunctional. To me, such things were just part of family life. But I always heard about them from third parties because appearance was everything in Ikoyi, most especially the appearance of respectability. 
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* I break that down in the novel, and in that sense it’s no different from novels I’ve read about suburban life in the United States, England and elsewhere, except it has moments of political intrigue and turmoil. I juxtapose these extraordinary national moments and ordinary domestic moments to give a realistic portrayal of how we lived. Perhaps my real motive is to depict Nigeria as one big dysfunctional family.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* No. I’ve never even read a Le Carré novel, but I slept with a few in a bookcase behind my headboard. My mother was a Le Carré fan. I studied Graham Greene’s The Power and the Glory when I was at school in England, which turned me into a fan of his prose. I realise my novel ventures into white male territory by playing with the idea of espionage and satirising high society. When you do that as an African woman writer, someone is bound to ask, “Why are you here? Have you lost your way? Do you know where you are going?” But I was raised by a woman whose experiences were not limited by her gender or nationality.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* I’ll tell you a couple of family stories. The first is that my mother met Graham Greene in a shop on Bond Street. Neither of us can remember the exact year it happened and she says the shop has since closed down. The funny part is that she’d never heard of him. After he left, the shop assistant mentioned his name and said he was a famous author. To this day I wish I’d been with her, just to confirm it was him. The second story is that during the coup that brought General Muhammed to power in 1975, an expatriate woman befriended my mother.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* We’d never seen the woman before, but she came to our house in south-west Ikoyi for a few nights and talked to my mother about the coup. On her first night she had dinner with us – osso buco. I remember this because it was a rare treat I looked forward to eating. We had no electricity at night, so my mother reheated it on a kerosene stove and we boiled rice and fried plantains. We ate dinner at the table with a battery lantern. I don’t recall details of what the woman said, but she soon stopped coming over and my mother said she had to be a spy. Of course I made fun of my mother.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* It doesn’t matter whether Frances Cooke – the bead collector – was spying or not. It was enough to show there were allegations in those days, which may have been partly due to xenophobia. Ikoyi, however, was where business and political leaders lived, and the United States did have an interest in spreading neo-liberal ideas to developing countries like Nigeria.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* I’m never afraid when I write. I’m sometimes nervous after my books are published, by which time it’s too late to censor myself. When you write boldly, you get mixed reactions and I assume it will be the same with this novel. Not just because of its content, but because of the way I’ve written it. Much of what we’ve talked about may be overlooked by readers who want more to happen in an African novel, but I don’t write to accommodate their needs. Also, whenever you write about privileged Africans, someone somewhere will be upset with you.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* Lastly, as you know, we have a few critics in the Nigerian literary community who are caught up in the old Igbo-Yoruba rivalry, which doesn’t interest me, but their reviews reflect that. I’m used to having different responses to my work. I don’t expect everyone to appreciate what I write and I’m thankful to readers who do.
** [https://brittlepaper.com/2019/01/chronicle-society-untold-sefi-atta-talks/]
* &quot;I don't think writers have a duty to provide solutions. Our duty is to ask questions and to tell the truth as we see it.&quot;
** [https://www.theafricareport.com/ Speaking on the role of writers in society]

* &quot;The challenge is always to write characters who are believable, even when readers disagree with them.&quot;
** [https://www.writersprojectghana.com/ Interview on character development]

* &quot;Lagos is endlessly fascinating because it is always changing, yet somehow it remains the same city.&quot;
** [https://brittlepaper.com/ Speaking on Lagos as a literary setting]

* &quot;Every novel teaches me something different about writing. I don't approach any book believing I already know how to write it.&quot;
** [https://www.asymptotejournal.com/interview/sefi-atta-on-fiction-and-memory/ Reflecting on her writing process]

* &quot;Memory is unreliable, but fiction allows us to search for emotional truths beyond facts.&quot;
** [https://www.asymptotejournal.com/interview/sefi-atta-on-fiction-and-memory/ On memory and fiction]

* &quot;I don't write to represent Nigeria. I write stories about people whose lives happen to unfold there.&quot;
** [https://www.asymptotejournal.com/interview/sefi-atta-on-fiction-and-memory/ Speaking on national identity and fiction]

* &quot;Humour is one of the ways people survive difficult circumstances, and I try not to lose sight of that in my fiction.&quot;
** [https://www.arlit.org/ Interview on humour in fiction]
==External links==
*https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/133292.Sefi_Atta

{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Atta, Sefi}}

[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Short story writers]]
[[Category:1964 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Women born in the 1960s]]
[[Category:Women authors from Nigeria]]</text>
      <sha1>qea1mafhot5vfa9lawvhzxd6o4b2b0h</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Adventure Time: Distant Lands</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>245175</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965072</id>
      <parentid>3958213</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:52:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965072</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4329" sha1="7ar3pks1r809ryqord42mwq2rlpvp4y" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Adventure Time (season 1)|1]] [[Adventure Time (season 2)|2]] [[Adventure Time (season 3)|3]] [[Adventure Time (season 4)|4]] [[Adventure Time (season 5)|5]] [[Adventure Time (season 6)|6]] [[Adventure Time (season 7)|7]] [[Adventure Time (season 8)|8]] [[Adventure Time (season 9)|9]] [[Adventure Time (season 10)|10]] | [[Adventure Time: Distant Lands|Distant Lands]] | [[Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake|Fionna and Cake]] | [[Adventure Time: Side Quests|Side Quests]] | [[Adventure Time: Bubblegum &amp; Marceline|Bubblegum &amp; Marceline]] | [[Adventure Time: Heyo BMO|Heyo BMO]] | [[Adventure Time|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Adventure Time: Distant Lands}}''''' (2020–2021) is an animated streaming limited series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network Studios|Cartoon Network Studios]] and [[w:Frederator Studios|Frederator Studios]] based on the Cartoon Network television series ''[[Adventure Time]]''.

{{tv-stub}}

==Episodes==
===''BMO''===
:'''BMO''': Ricky, you beast! Now go! Be free!
:'''Ricky''': My name is Twinkletoes.
:'''BMO''': Oh, okay.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''BMO''': Good babies.

===''Obsidian''===
:'''Marceline''': Oh, come on, you love it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Marceline''': ''[cries, sniffles and wipes her face]'' Ugh. Mom... ''[the door creaks open and footsteps approach; gasps]'' Mom?
:'''Glassboy''': ''[dramatically stepping into the room]'' It’s me, Glassboy! ''[laughs and does a small jump towards Marceline]'' Haha! I heard something weird so I came in.
:'''Marceline''': I wanna be ''[stands up and takes a slightly demonic form; yelling]'' '''&lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;ALONE RIGHT NOW!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;''' ''[breathes heavily]''
:'''Glassboy''': Please don’t send me away. I-I’m just like you!
:'''Marceline''': ''[collapses face-down on the floor; annoyed]'' You don’t say.
:'''Glassboy''': I thought I was sad that See-Thru Princess turned on me, ''[sheds tear]'' but now I know it was just ''[crosses arms and shakes shoulders]'' punk-rock anger.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:''(Princess Bubblegum and Marceline are slow-dancing together)''
:'''Bubblegum''': I must look a real mess.
:'''Marceline''': Nuh-uh, you always look great after fighting a monster.
:'''Bubblegum''': ''(blushing)'' You think so? ''(she giggles and takes her hair out of its ponytail)'' This is nice, we never get to dance. You're always the one performing. 
:'''Marceline''': I have a lot more songs I want to sing. Real sappy ones.
:'''Bubblegum''': Good. I've always loved your songs.

===''Together Again''===
: '''Finn''': Uh, Mr. Death?
:'''New Death''': ''[turns to Finn]'' Huh? How'd you get in here?!
:'''Mr. Fox''': Quick brown fox! ''[jumps off of Tiffany as he retreats]''
:'''New Death''': Way to guard the castle, Mullet! ''[throws his soda can at Tiffany]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
: '''Finn''': Anybody here? What deadworld this?
: '''Choose Goose''': You've reached deadworld the first, number one at being worst.
: '''Finn''': Choose Goose! You're here?
: '''Choose Goose''': I know, it's weird! Rhymes aren't crimes!

===''Wizard City''===
:'''Cadebra''': Do not try this at home!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bufo''': Yes, I used to be a dark wizard. Many say the greatest dark wizard. Did I swim deep in the loomy gloom? Yes. Did I transcend the eight schools of magic? Yep. Did I throw Laser Wizard and Forest Wizard under the bus to buy my own freedom? Ehh. That's all in the past. And I'm not gonna talk about it. ''[beat]'' Okay, you know what? Let's talk about it.
:'''Larry''': Hey, we're here to learn some real wizardry, not hear your sad backstory!
:''[Bufo turns Larry into a rock]''
:'''Bufo''': How do you like me now, Larry?

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:HBO Max shows]]
[[Category:2020s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American animated TV spin-offs]]
[[Category:LGBT-related animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated comic science fiction TV shows]]
[[Category:American children's animated science fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about dogs]]
[[Category:Adventure Time]]
[[Category:Cancelled shows]]
[[Category:Television series on DVD]]</text>
      <sha1>7ar3pks1r809ryqord42mwq2rlpvp4y</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>House of the Dragon</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>250188</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965277</id>
      <parentid>3961760</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:49:30Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Warpfrz</username>
        <id>3242234</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* TBA [3.04] */</comment>
      <origin>3965277</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="116704" sha1="mj9w343n9kx3xru907dxmki7zpbyv03" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:House of the dragon logo.png|thumb|The only thing that could tear down the house of the dragon was itself.]]
'''''[[w:House of the Dragon|House of the Dragon]]''''' (2022–present) is an American fantasy drama airing on HBO about the events leading up to and surrounding the civil war known as the &quot;Dance of the Dragons,&quot; which took place 200 years before the events of ''[[Game of Thrones]]''.

==Season 1==
===''[[w:The Heirs of the Dragon|The Heirs of the Dragon]]'' [1.01]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': As the first century of the Targaryen dynasty came to a close, the health of the Old King, Jaehaerys, was failing. In those days, House Targaryen stood at the height of its strength, with ten adult dragons under its yoke. No power in the world could stand against it. King Jaehaerys reigned over nearly sixty years of peace and prosperity, but tragedy had claimed both his sons, leaving his succession in doubt. So, in the year 101, the Old King called a Great Council to choose an heir. Over a thousand lords made the journey to Harrenhal. Fourteen succession claims were heard, but only two were truly considered. Rhaenys, the King's eldest descendant, and her younger cousin, Prince Viserys Targaryen, the King's eldest ''male'' descendant.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''King Jaehaerys I Targaryen''': ''[flashback, the day of the Great Council]'' It is declared by all lords paramount and lords vassal of the Seven Kingdoms that Prince Viserys Targaryen be made Prince of Dragonstone.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Rhaenys, a woman, would not inherit the Iron Throne. The lords instead chose Viserys, my father. Jaehaerys called the Great Council to prevent a war being fought over his succession. For he knew the cold truth. The only thing that could tear down the House of the Dragon was itself.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemma''': You will lie in this bed soon enough, Rhaenyra. This discomfort is how we serve the realm.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I'd rather serve as a knight and ride to battle and glory.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemma''': We have royal wombs, you and I. The childbed is our battlefield.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''':  You've not been seen in the Vale or at Runestone for quite some time.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I think my bronze bitch is happier for my absence.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Lady Rhea is your wife, a good and honorable Lady of the Vale.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': In the Vale, men are said to fuck sheep instead of women. I can assure you the sheep are prettier.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': No one here can know what Daemon would do were he king, but no one can doubt his ambition. Look at what he did with the gold cloaks. The City Watch is fiercely loyal to him. An army two thousand strong.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': An army ''you'' gave him, Otto. I named Daemon Master of Laws, but you said he was a tyrant. As Master of Coin, you said he was a spendthrift that would beggar the realm. Putting Daemon in command of the City Watch was ''your'' solution!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': A half-measure, Your Grace. The truth is, Daemon should be far away from this court.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Daemon is my brother. My blood. And he ''will'' have his place at my court. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mellos''': Let him keep his place at court, Your Grace, but if the gods should visit some further tragedy on you, either by design or accident...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': ''Design''? What are you saying? My brother would murder me, take my crown? Are you? Please. Daemon has ambition, yes, but not for the throne. He lacks the patience for it.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': The gods have yet to make a man who lacks the patience for absolute power, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Did you say it?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I don't know what you mean.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You will address me as Your Grace or I will have my Kingsguard cut out your tongue. &quot;The Heir for a Day&quot;. Did you say it?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': We must all mourn in our own way, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': My family has just been destroyed. But instead of being by my side, or Rhaenyra's, you chose to celebrate your own rise! Laughing with your whοres and your lickspittles! You have no allies at court but me! I have only ever defended you! Yet everything I've given you, you've thrown back in my face!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You've only ever tried to send me away, To the Vale, to the City Watch, anywhere but by your side! Ten years you've been king, and yet not once have you asked me to be your Hand!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Why would I do that?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Because I'm your brother. And the blood of the dragon runs thick.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Then why do you cut me so deeply?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I've only ever spoken the truth, I see Otto Hightower for what he is.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': An unwavering and loyal Hand?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': A ''cunt!'' A second son who stands to inherit nothing he doesn't seize for himself.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Otto Hightower is a more honorable man than you could ever be.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': He doesn't protect you. I would.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': From what?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Yourself. You're weak, Viserys. And that council of leeches knows it. They all prey on you for their own ends.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I have decided to name a new heir.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I'm your heir.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Not anymore. You are to return to Runestone and your lady wife at once. And you are to do so without quarrel, by order of your King.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Everyone says Targaryens are closer to gods than to men but they say that because of our dragons. Without them, we're just like everyone else. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': The idea that we control the dragons is an illusion. They're a power man should never have trifled with. One that brought Valyria its doom. If we don't mind our own histories, it will do the same to us. Targaryen must understand this to be King. Or Queen. ''[Rhaenyra looks at her father as his words sink in]'' I am sorry, Rhaenyra. I have wasted the years since you were born wanting for a son. You are the very best of your mother, and I now believe, as I know she did, that you could be a great ruling Queen.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': There's something else that I need to tell you. It might be difficult for you to understand, but you must hear it. Our histories... They tell us that Aegon looked across the Blackwater from Dragonstone and saw a rich land ripe for the capture. But ambition alone is not what drove him to conquest. It was a dream. And just as Daenys foresaw the end of Valyria, Aegon foresaw the end of the world of men. 'Tis to begin with a terrible winter gusting out of the distant north. Aegon saw absolute darkness riding on those winds. And whatever dwells within will destroy the world of the living. When this Great Winter comes, Rhaenyra, all of Westeros must stand against it. And if the world of men is to survive, a Targaryen must be seated on the Iron Throne. A king or queen strong enough to unite the realm against the cold and the dark. Aegon called his dream &quot;[[Game of Thrones|The Song of Ice and Fire]].&quot; This secret, it's been passed from king to heir since Aegon's time. Now you must promise to carry it and protect it. Promise me this, Rhaenyra. Promise me.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Rogue Prince (House of the Dragon)|The Rogue Prince]]'' [1.02]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': I fear that the eyes of our enemies are presently fixed on the Red Keep. The Queen has passed. A girl has been named heir to the Iron Throne, the first in its history. The King's brother, so disinherited, has claimed the Targaryen seat on Dragonstone without challenge. And now, a foreign power has established a colony in our most critical shipping lane.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You paint such an aspirant portrait of my reign, Lord Corlys.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''':  It is an honest one, cousin. At the moment, the Crown is perceived as being vulnerable.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': And a blind incursion in the Stepstones is the only way to demonstrate that we are not? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': To elude a storm, you can either sail into it or around it. But you must ''never'' await its coming.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Whether it's to my daughter or to someone else's, your father will remarry sooner than late. His new wife ''will'' produce new heirs, and chances are better than not that one of those will be male. And when that boy comes of age and your father has passed, the men of the realm will expect ''him'' to be heir, not you. Because that is the order of things.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': When I am Queen, I will create a new order.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': How I wish that could be, Rhaenyra. But the men of the realm already had their opportunity to appoint a ruling Queen at the Great Council and they denied it.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': They denied ''you'', Princess Rhaenys. &quot;The Queen Who Never Was&quot;. But they bent the knee to me and called me heir to the throne.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Do you remind your father's men of that as you carry their cups? Here is the hard truth, which no one else has the heart to tell you. Men would sooner put the realm to the torch than see a woman ascend the Iron Throne. And your father is no fool.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': I have been sold as property more times than I care to count, beginning in a homeland I can no longer recall. Most of my years have been spent living in terror.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You're safe with me, I swear it.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': You are Targaryen. You can afford to play your stupid games with the King, but I cannot. I didn't come into your service wanting gold. Or power. Or station. I came to you to be liberated.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Liberated. From what?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': Fear.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I wish I had known better what to say to you in the aftermath. I struggled to realize that my daughter had so quickly become a woman grown. But I ''know'' she understands what is now expected of me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The king must take a new wife.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I could ''never'' replace your mother. No more than I intend to replace you as heir. But you are my only heir and our line is vulnerable, too easily ended. And by marrying again, I may begin to ensure that we are better defended.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Against whom?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Whomever may dare to challenge us. ''[pause]'' I do not wish to make us estranged.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You are the king. Your first duty is to the realm. Mother would have understood this. Just as I do.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': You've heard of the trouble in the Stepstones?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Some Myrish prince is feeding Westerosi sailors to the crabs.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': I have been petitioning the King to send my navy into the territory, but he's denied me.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': It was never my brother's strongest trait.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': What?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Being king.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': The Crabfeeder is backed by powerful entities within the Free Cities who wish to see Westeros weakened. And the King's failures have allowed him to accumulate strength. If those shipping lanes fall, my house will be crippled. And I will not have Driftmark beggared while our King idles himself with feasts and balls and tourneys.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I will speak of my brother as I wish. You will not.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': Waiting in the Stepstones is a chance for you to prove your worth to any who might yet doubt it. We are the realm's second sons, Daemon. Our worth is not given. It must be ''made''.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:Second of His Name|Second of His Name]]'' [1.03]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Since you came of age, I've been slowly drowning in a lake of parchment flung from every corner of the realm. Marriage proposals, all. And I have tried often to discuss it with you, but you've refused me at every turn.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': That is because I do not wish to get married.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Even I do not exist above tradition and duty, Rhaenyra!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Many in my line have been dragon riders. Very few among us have been dreamers. What is the power of a dragon next to the power of prophecy?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': The hour is too late, husband.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': When Rhaenyra was a child, I saw it in a dream. As vivid as these flames, I saw it. A male babe born to me wearing the Conqueror's crown. And I so wanted it to be true, to be a dreamer myself. I sought that vision again, night after night, but it never came again. I poured all my thought and will into it. And my obsession killed Rhaenyra's mother.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Viserys...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I thought Rhaenyra was the way out of my abyss of grief and regret. And naming her heir would begin to set things right.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Oh, it did.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I never imagined I would remarry, that I would have a son. What if I was wrong?&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Rhaenyra will be a good queen.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': It wouldn't matter if she were Jaehaerys himself born again. Rhaenyra is a woman.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': What of my son? Would you have me raise a man to steal his own sister's birthright?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': It is Aegon that's being robbed. He's the firstborn son of the King. To deny that he is heir to the throne is to assail the laws of gods and men. The road ahead is uncertain, but the end is clear. Aegon ''will'' be king.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You have misjudged me, Rhaenyra.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': All know it. Jason Lannister knows it. You said it yourself, the lords of the realm gather like vultures to a carcass, hoping to feast on my bones.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': It is true that as rulers we must marry for advantage to forge alliances and bolster our strength. You have always understood this. I myself was promised to your mother when I was...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Ten-and-seven years of age. The Vale had an army to rival the North. I've heard that story since I've had ears to.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I loved her. She made a man of me. I do not seek to replace you, child. You've been much alone these last few years. Alone and angry. I will not live forever. I wish to see you contented, happy even.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You think a man will do it? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': A family.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I had a family.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': What would you have me do?!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': If it was for advantage, you would've wed Laena Velaryon!&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': That is true enough. You must marry, strengthen your own claim, shore up your succession, multiply. As to your match, make it yourself. Search him out. Find one that pleases you, as I did. Rhaenyra, I did waver at one time. But I swear to you now, on your mother's memory, you will not be supplanted.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:King of the Narrow Sea|King of the Narrow Sea]]'' [1.04]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': How angry is he?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': The King went through great effort to arrange your tour. He is frustrated. But I am glad you are home. I find I have few friends lately. I like to believe I'm still the Lady Alicent, but all anyone sees when they look at me now is &quot;The Queen.&quot;&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I've missed you, too.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You cannot live your life in fear, or you will forsake the best parts of it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I have no desire to live in fear. Only solitude.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Such a lovely prospect.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Their wants are of no consequences.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': They're of great consequence if you expect to rule then one day.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': When I offered up my crown, you said I could have anything. I want Rhaenyra. I'll take her as she is, and wed her in the tradition of our house.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You are already wed.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': That didn't stop Aegon the Conqueror from taking a second wife. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You are no conqueror. You are a plague sent to destroy me.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Give me Rhaenyra to take to wife and we will return the House of the Dragon to its proper glory.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Of course. It's not my daughter you lust for, is it? It's my throne. Go back to the Vale, Daemon, to your lawful wife. Strive to restore whatever scrap of honor remains in you. Or don't. Matters not to me. As long as you are gone from my sight for good.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': My father was a hale and healthy warrior and dragonrider at the peak of his abilities. Jaehaerys named a great royal hunt to celebrate him being named the Hand of the King. Five days later, my father lay dead. Tourneys last longer. Baelon the Brave, rider of Vhagar, heir to the Iron Throne, dead of a burst belly. The gods have a dark wit.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': It was a grim day. I recall it all too well.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': It was a good day for you. Jaehaerys named you Hand in Baelon's stead.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': That's hardly how I viewed it, Your Grace. It was a duty.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You served my grandsire nobly in his final days. You are the man that taught me how to be King.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Oh, you honor me, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Just five days you went from being another man in Jaehaerys's court to the second most powerful man in the realm. I wonder, how long did it take you to choose yourself over your King?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Your Grace?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I will never recover from Aemma's death. But Alicent, she took me through the worst of my grief. She was a calculated distraction. I only now realize how well-calculated it was.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': That is an absurdity. The Queen loves you as I know you love her.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Your interests no longer align with those of the realm. Your judgment has been compromised.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': A loyal Hand must tell his king a discomforting truth from time to time, Your Grace. If he doesn't, he's failed as a servant.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': You were a faithful servant, Otto. The Crown and the realm both owe you a debt that can never be repaid. But I can no longer trust your judgment.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:We Light the Way|We Light the Way]]'' [1.05]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': I do not wish to see you go.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Such is the king's decision.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': A decision I most vigorously regret.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': And yet you made it possible. You chose Rhaenyra.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': She swore her innocence. And I believed her.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': You wanted to believe her. As did her father.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Your informant was wrong. An honest mistake, perhaps, but I did not foresee this! &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': You should have.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': If you had not been so relentless in advancing Aegon as heir...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Listen to me, daughter. The King ''will'' die. It may be months or years, but he'll not live to be an old man, and if Rhaenyra succeeds him, war will follow, do you understand? The realm will not accept her. And to secure her claim, she'll have to put your children to the sword. She'll have no choice. You know it. You're no fool and yet you choose not to see it. The time is coming, Alicent. Either you prepare Aegon to rule, or you cleave to Rhaenyra and pray for her mercy.&lt;/div&gt; 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I know that whatever agreement being struck up there will not change your appetites, nor will it change mine.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laenor''': And what do you propose?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': That we perform our duty to our fathers and to the realm. And when it's done, each of us dines as we see fit.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': We are placing our son in danger.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': The lords of the realm bent the knee to Rhaenyra and swore obeisance to her.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': That was before there was a true-born prince named Aegon Targaryen. Rhaenyra's succession will be challenged. Knives will come out, for her, her husband, and their heirs.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': Our house controls the realm's navy and half its dragons. Anyone fool enough to challenge Rhaenyra's claim will be crushed.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': To what end, Corlys? Wealth? Power? Pride?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': Justice. By all rights, you should be Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. You were robbed of the crown by...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': I never wore the crown because the realm would not have it so.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': But I would remedy that small-minded error by any means necessary.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': Let us leave it all behind and see the world together, where we'll be nameless and free. Free to go where we like, to love as we like. In Essos, you could marry me. A marriage for love, not for the crown.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I ''am'' the crown, Ser Criston. Or I will be. I may chafe at my duties, but do you think I would choose infamy in exchange for a bushel of oranges or a ship to Asshai? It is my duty to marry a nobleman from a great house and Ser Laenor will make a fine husband. But my, uh, my marriage does not have to be the end. Ser Criston, Laenor and I have an understanding. I've granted him leave to pursue his own interests. And in turn, he's granted me the same.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': So you want me to be your whοre?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I want us to continue as we began, with you as my sworn protector, my white knight.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': I took an oath. As a, as a knight of, of your Kingsguard. An oath of chastity. I've broken it.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I won't tell anyone...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': I've, I've soiled my, my, my white cloak. And it is the only thing I have to my fսcking name! I, I thought if we were married, I might be able to restore it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The Iron Throne looms larger than me, larger than anyone in my family.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Will I be remembered as a good king?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lyonel''': Your Grace?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': What will they say of me when the histories are written? I have neither fought nor conquered, nor suffered any great defeat.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lyonel''': Some might call that good fortune.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': It hardly makes a good song, does it? To be sung at feasts in a hundred years, five hundred. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lyonel''': You have carried King Jaehaerys's legacy, and kept the realm strong. Is it not better to live in peace than to have songs sung after you are dead?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Perhaps. But there is a part of me wishes I'd been tested. I often think that in the crucible, I may have been forged a different man.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lyonel''': Many that are tested only wish to have been spared it.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Princess and the Queen (House of the Dragon)|The Princess and the Queen]]'' [1.06]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': You are nearly a man-grown. How is it that you can be so shortsighted? If Rhaenyra comes into power, your very life could be forfeit. Aemond's as well. She could move to cut off any challenge to her succession.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Then I won't challenge...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': You are the challenge! You are the challenge, Aegon! Simply by living and breathing! You are the King's firstborn son. And what they know, what everyone in the realm knows in their blood and in their bones, is that one day, you will be our King.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Dark rumors are hunting us, Laenor. They nip at our heels. Questions about our sons' parentage. Vile, disgusting insinuations.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laenor''': Insinuations, are they?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': They are our sons! Yours and mine. And their true father will not abandon them now to go carousing through the Narrow Sea, waggling his sword and winking at his sailors.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laenor''': I am a knight and a warrior. And I have played my part here, faithfully, for ten years. I am owed some...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You are owed ''nothing''! For ten years, you have indulged yourself at court, bought the finest horses, drunk the rarest of wines, fսckеd the lustiest boys. This was our agreement. I have not begrudged you. But you do not desert your post when the storm lashes.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laenor''': The wise sailor flees the storm as it gathers.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Very well then. I command you. As your Princess and the heir to the throne, you are commanded to remain in King's Landing and at my side.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laena''': You laud the virtues of Pentos, but you have no interest in it. If you did, you would venture into the city, but instead, you spend your time here, in the library, reading accounts of the same dead dragonlords whose legacy you claim has no hold on you.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Didn't know I was being so minutely observed.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laena''': You do not sleep.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Well, how can I with you haunting my every move?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laena''': Life has, I know, disappointed you. Perhaps, I too, am not the wife you would've wished for yourself.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Laena...&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Laena''': It does not pain me. I have made my peace. But you are more than this, Daemon. The man I married was more than this.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': Is Harwin Strong my father? Am I a bastard?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You are a Targaryen. That's all that matters.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': What are children but a weakness? A folly? A futility? Through them, you imagine you cheat the great darkness of its victory. You will persist forever, in some form or another. As if they will keep you from the dust. But ''for'' them, you surrender what you should not. You may know what is the right thing to be done, but love stays the hand. Love is a downfall. Best to make your way through life unencumbered if you ask me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': ''[referring to Lord Lyonel and Ser Harwin Strong]'' They're dead.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': You've heard the stories of Harrenhal, Your Grace. It was built in hubris by Harren the Black as a monument to his own greatness. Blood mixed into the mortar. It is said to be a cursed place. That it passes judgment on all who pass beneath its gates.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': You, ''you'' passed judgment.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': The Queen makes a wish. What servant of the realm would not strive to fulfill it?&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:Driftmark|Driftmark]]'' [1.07]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[after Otto Hightower offers his condolences]'' No matter how fat the leech grows, it always wants for another meal.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': The crown was yours until those fools at the Great Council plucked it from your head. Is it such a terrible thing for your husband to wish to win it back?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Tonight of all nights, let us lay aside this falsehood. It is not justice for your wife that drives you. It is your own ambition. 'Tis desire for the throne. If not for yourself, then for the scions of your house. I gave up the idea of wearing a crown a generation ago. It is you, lord husband, who refuses to abandon this pursuit, even now, at the cost of our children.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': What is this brief mortal life if not the pursuit of legacy?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Legacy may be why you live your life, Corlys. I want Driftmark to pass through Laena's line to Baela. To true Velaryon blood. Declare it now, while all are gathered here, and we will say that is how we will honor Laena's memory.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': And disinherit our son?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': He will be the King Consort. His son will one day sit the Iron Throne.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': You would have me cast an even darker shadow over those little boys than already exists.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': We are alone here, husband. You can speak the plain truth as we both know it. Rhaenyra's children are not of your blood. But Laena's are. They are her legacy.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': History does not remember blood. It remembers names.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': ''[after stopping Alicent from blinding Lucerys]'' You've gone too far!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': What have I done but what was expected of me? Forever upholding the kingdom, the family, the law, while you flout all to do as you please?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Alicent, let her go!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Where is duty?! Where is sacrifice?! It's trampled under your pretty foot again!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Release the blade, Alicent.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': And now you take my son's eye, and to even that, you feel entitled!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Exhausting, wasn't it? Hiding beneath the cloak of your own righteousness. But now they see you as you are.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Do not mourn me, Mother. It was a fair exchange. I may have lost an eye, but I gained a dragon.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': I disgraced myself. And ensured my husband's favor will forever rest on her. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': And yet I've never seen that side of you, my daughter. I even doubted its existence.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': It was an ugly thing. I regret it. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': We play an ugly game. And now, for the first time, I see that you have the determination to win it.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Lord of the Tides|The Lord of the Tides]]'' [1.08]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': I must admit my confusion. I do not understand why petitions are being heard over a settled succession. The only one present who might offer keener insight into Lord Corlys' wishes is the Princess Rhaenys.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Indeed, Your Grace. It was ever my husband's wish that Driftmark pass through Ser Laenor to his trueborn son, Lucerys Velaryon. His mind never changed, nor did my support of him. As a matter of fact, the Princess Rhaenyra has just informed me of her desire to marry her sons, Jace and Luke, to Lord Corlys' granddaughters, Baela and Rhaena. A proposal to which I heartily agree.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Well, the matter is settled. ''Again''. I hereby reaffirm Prince Lucerys of House Velaryon as heir to Driftmark, the Driftwood Throne, and the next Lord of the Tides.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Vaemond''': You break law, and centuries of tradition, to install your daughter as heir. Yet you dare tell me who deserves to inherit the name Velaryon?! ''No.'' I will not allow it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': &quot;Allow it&quot;? Do not forget yourself, Vaemond.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Vaemond''': ''[points at Lucerys]'' ''That'' is no true Velaryon! And certainly, no nephew of mine.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': ''[to her sons]'' Go to your chambers. ''[to Vaemond]'' You have said ''enough.''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': Lucerys is my trueborn grandson. And you are no more than the second son of Driftmark.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Vaemond''': ''You'' may run your House as you see fit. But you will not decide the future of mine! My House survived the Doom, and a thousand tribulations besides! ''[looking at Lucerys hatefully]'' And gods be damned, I will not see it ended on the account of this... ''[pauses]''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''Say it.''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Vaemond Targaryen''': ''[glaring at Rhaenyra]'' Her children are ''bastards! [to Viserys]'' And she is a ''whore.''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': ''[forces himself to his feet and draws his dagger]'' I will have your tongue for that!&lt;/div&gt; 
:''[Daemon suddenly swings Dark Sister from behind, beheading Vaemond above the jawline]''
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': He can keep his tongue.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Viserys''': It both gladdens my heart, and fills me with sorrow, to see these faces around the table. The faces, most dear to me in all the world. Yet grown so ''distant'' from each other, in the years past. ''[removes his half-mask, showing his missing eye and rotting face]'' My own face is no longer a handsome one. If, indeed, it ever was. But tonight, I wish you to see me as I am. Not just a king, but your father. Your brother. Your husband. And your grandsire. Who may not, it seems, walk for much longer among you. Let us no longer hold ill feelings in our hearts. The Crown cannot stand strong if the House of the Dragon remains divided. But set aside your grievances! If not for the sake of the Crown, then for the sake of this old man, who loves you ''all'' so dearly!&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Green Council|The Green Council]]'' [1.09]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Tyland''': What is it that could not have waited an hour? Was Dorne invaded?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': The King is dead. We grieve for Viserys the Peaceful, our sovereign, our friend. But he has left us a gift. With his last breath, he impressed upon the Queen his final wish that his son Aegon should succeed him as Lord of the Seven Kingdoms.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Tyland''': Then we may proceed now with the full assurance of his blessing on our long-laid plans.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Yes. There is much to be done, as we have previously discussed. Now, there are two among the captains of the City Watch who remain loyal to Daemon. Let us replace them. Lord Lannister?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Tyland''': The Treasury is well in hand. The gold will be divided for safe keeping.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Let ravens be sent to our allies, Riverrun and Highgarden...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''':  Am I to understand that members of the Small Council have been planning secretly to install my son without me?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Jasper Wylde''': My Queen, there was no need to sully you with darkling schemes.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Beesbury''': I will not have this! To hear that you are plotting to replace the King's chosen heir with an imposter...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Tyland''': His firstborn son is hardly an imposter.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Beesbury''': Hundreds of lords and landed knights swore fealty to the Princess.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Tyland''': That was some twenty years ago. Most of them are now dead.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Jasper Wylde''': You heard the Lord Hand. Plot or no, the King changed his mind.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Beesbury''': I am six and seventy years old. I have known Viserys longer than any who sit at this table, and I will not believe he said this on his deathbed, alone, with only the boy's mother as a witness! This is seizure! It is theft! It is treason!&lt;/div&gt; 

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': ''[after Alicent visits her while under house arrest]'' I will do you the considerable courtesy of assuming there is a good reason for the outrage of my treatment here this morning!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': My sincerest regrets for the lack of ceremony.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': The King? ''[Alicent nods]'' And you are usurping the throne.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': It was my husband's dying wish. ''[Rhaenys scoffs]'' Believe it or no, it is of no consequence. Aegon will be king. I came here to ask for your support.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Well, I must credit you for your boldness.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': House Velaryon has long allied itself with the Princess Rhaenyra. And what has it gained you? Your daughter dead, alone in Pentos. Your son cuckolded. Rhaenyra's heirs are none of yours. It is your husband who grasps so heedlessly for the throne. And even he has abandoned you. Gone these six long years to fight a desperate battle, returning grievously, if not mortally, wounded, leaving the Lady of Driftmark to chart her course alone.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': The word of my house is not fickle.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': No. But, dear cousin, you more than any soul alive understand what I say now. Princess Rhaenys, I loved my husband, but I will speak the truth we both know. You should've been queen. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': I little thought to hear those words from you.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': The Iron Throne was yours by blood and by temperament. Viserys would've lived his days a country lord, content to hunt and study his histories, but here we are. We do not rule but we may guide the men that do. Gently, away from violence and sure destruction and instead toward peace. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Is it in the name of peace that you've imprisoned me? And what of my dragon?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': If we are overmatched, Rhaenyra will be tempted to strike us, and war will ensue. Without your dragon, she may be persuaded to negotiate. If it's Driftmark you want, you shall have it for you and your granddaughters to pass on as you see fit.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': You are wiser than I believed you to be, Alicent Hightower.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': A true queen counts the cost to her people.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': And yet you toil still in service to men. Your father, your husband, your son. You desire not to be free, but to make a window in the wall of your prison. Have you never imagined ''yourself'' on the Iron Throne?&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': ''[to Otto Hightower]'' There is no power but what the people allow you to take.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': None of this is a game.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': And yet, you treat it as one. A charming contest, the prize a pouch of silver. We have relied on one another these many years and now, it is the good of the family we both desire. Whatever our differences, our hearts remain as one.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Our hearts were never one, I see that now. Rather, I have been a piece you moved about the board.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': If that is true, then I made you Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. Would you have desired it otherwise?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': How could I have known? I wanted whatever you impressed upon me to want, and now the debt comes due. A debt you were happy enough to pay.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': A sacrifice. A sacrifice made for the stability of the realm. No King has ever lived who has not had to forfeit the lives of a few to protect the many! Though I understand your squeamishness...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Reluctance to murder is not a weakness! I have Aegon. We will proceed now as ''I'' see fit. We will send terms to Rhaenyra on Dragonstone. True terms that she may accept without shame.&lt;/div&gt;  
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': If she lives, her allies will mass behind her banners, looking for her return.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Then she must not return. My husband would have desired this mercy be shown to his daughter.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Your husband? Or ''you'', his daughter's childhood companion?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Criston Cole will be named Lord Commander of the Kingsguard. My son will be anointed tomorrow at dawn. The whole of King's Landing must witness his ascent. He will assume authority, there will be no more dithering. My son will take the crown of his namesake, the Conqueror, and carry Blackfyre, his sword. Let the people remember the ancient strength of House Targaryen.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': You look so much like your mother in certain lights.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Have the decency to look grateful. Do you know what has been done to give you this day? In an hour, you will be king.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': And my father never wanted this.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': That's not true.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': He had twenty years to name me heir, and never did. Steadfastly he upheld Rhaenyra's claim.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': He changed his mind.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': No. He could have, but he never did. Because he didn't like me.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Black Queen (House of the Dragon)|The Black Queen]]'' [1.10]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Viserys is dead. I grieve this loss with you, Rhaenyra. My cousin, your father, possessed a kind heart. ''[pause]'' There is more. Aegon has been crowned as his successor.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': They crowned him?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': How did Viserys die?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': I could not say.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': How long ago? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': A day past, perhaps two. I was made a prisoner in my quarters while the Queen made her preparations.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Viserys has been slain!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Alicent demanded you declare for Aegon?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': She did. I refused her.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': And yet you are alive.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': The High Septon crowned Aegon in the Dragonpit. I witnessed it myself just before I fled on Meleys. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': They crowned him before the masses?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': So that the masses would see him as their rightful king.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': That whore of a Queen murdered my brother and stole his throne, and you could have burnt them all for it!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': A war is like to be fought over this treachery, to be sure, but that war is not mine to begin. I only rushed this warning to you out of loyalty to my husband and to my House. The Greens are coming for you, Rhaenyra, and your children.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Bartimos Celtigar''': Pray forgive my bluntness, Your Grace, but talk of men is moot. Your cause owns a power that has not been seen in this world since the days of Old Valyria. Dragons.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The Greens have dragons as well.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': They have three adults, by my count. We have Syrax, Caraxes and Meleys. Your sons have Vermax, Arrax and Tyraxes. Baela has Moondancer...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Daemon, none of our dragons have been to war.&lt;/div&gt;
:'''Daemon''': There are also unclaimed dragons. Seasmoke still resides on Driftmark. Vermithor and Silverwing dwell on the Dragonmount, still riderless. Then there are three wild dragons, all of whom nest here.
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''':  And who is to ride them?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Dragonstone has thirteen to their four. I also have a score of eggs incubating in the Dragonmont. Now, we need a place to gather, a toehold large enough to house a sizeable force. Here, at Harrenhal. We cut off the west, surround King's Landing with the dragons, and we can have every Green head mounted on spikes before the fucking moon turns!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Princess Rhaenyra. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I'm ''Queen'' Rhaenyra now, and you are all traitors to the realm.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': King Aegon Targaryen, Second of His Name, in his wisdom and desire for peace, is offering terms. Acknowledge Aegon as King and swear obeisance before the Iron Throne. In exchange, His Grace will confirm your possession of Dragonstone. It will pass to your trueborn son, Jacaerys, upon your death. Lucerys will be confirmed as the legitimate heir to Driftmark and all the lands and holdings of House Velaryon. Your sons by Prince Daemon will be given places of high honour at court; Aegon the Younger as the King's squire, Viserys as his cupbearer. Finally, the King, in his good grace, will pardon any knight or lord who conspired against his ascent.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I would rather feed my sons to the dragons than have them carry shields and cups for your drunken usurper cunt of a king!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Aegon Targaryen sits the Iron Throne. He wears the Conqueror's crown, wields the Conqueror's sword, has the Conqueror's name. He was anointed by a septon of the Faith before the eyes of thousands. Every symbol of legitimacy belongs to him. And then there is Stark, Tully, Baratheon. Houses that have also received, and are at present, considering generous terms from their king.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Stark, Tully and Baratheon all swore to me when King Viserys named me his heir.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Stale oaths will not put you upon the Iron Throne, Princess. The succession changed the day your father sired a son. I only regret you and he were the last to see the truth of it...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': ''[removes and discards Otto's Hand badge]'' You are no more Hand than Aegon is King, fucking traitor!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': ''[Hands Rhaenyra a page she once tore from Alicent's book, detailing the conqueress Princess Nymeria; Alicent sent it as a gesture of good-will] ''The Queen has not forgotten the love you once had for each other. No blood need be spilled, so the realm can carry on in peace. Queen Alicent eagerly awaits your answer.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': She can have her answer now, stuffed in her father's mouth along with his withered cock. Let's end this mummer's farce. ''[Draws his sword, Dark Sister]''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': No - King's Landing will have my answer on the morrow.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Lord Corlys. It brings much relief to see you hail and healthy, again.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': I'm very sorry about your father, Princess. He was a good man. Where is Daemon?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': There were other matters which demanded the Prince's attention.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': Hmm. ''[limps forward to the Painted Table]'' Your declared allies?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Yes.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': Too few to win a war, for the Throne.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Well, we would ''also'' hope, to have the support of Houses Arryn, Baratheon and Stark-&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': Hope is the fool's ally.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Both Arryn and Baratheon share blood with my House, but all of them swore oaths to me-&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': As did House ''Hightower'', if I remember?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': As did ''you'', Lord Corlys.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': ''[looks briefly to Rhaenys, their granddaughters and Rhaenyra's sons]'' Your father's realm was one of justice, and honor. Our Houses are bound by common blood, and common cause. This Hightower treason ''cannot'' stand. You have the full support of our fleet, and House, Your Grace. ''[bows to her]''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You honor me, Lord Corlys. ''[she follows his gaze to Rhaenys, who smiles]'' Princess Rhaenys. But, as I said to my bannermen, I made a promise to my father to hold the Realm strong, and united. If war's first stroke is to fall, it will not be by my hand.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': You do not mean to act?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Taking caution does not mean standing fast. I wish to know who my allies are, before I send them to war.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': The consequence of my... near-demise in the Stepstones is that we now control them. I took care to fully garrison the territory this time. A total blockade of the shipping lanes will be in place in days, if not already. The Triarchy have been routed; the Narrow Sea is ours. If we further seal the Gullet, we can cut off all seaborne travel and trade to King's Landing.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': I shall take Meleys and patrol the Gullet myself.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Bartimos Celtigar''': When we drain the Narrow Sea, we can surround King's Landing. Lay siege to the Red Keep, and force the Greens to surrender.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': If we're to have enough swords to surround King's Landing, we must first secure the support of Winterfell, the Eyrie and Storm's End.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Maester Gerardys''': I'll prepare the ravens, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': ''We'' should bear those messages. Dragons can fly faster than ravens, and they're more convincing. Send us.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': The Prince is right, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Very well. Prince Jacaerys will fly north. First to the Eyrie to see my mother's cousin, the Lady Jeyne Arryn, and then to Winterfell, to treat with Cregan Stark for the support of the North. Prince Lucerys will fly south to Storm's End, and treat with Lord Borros Baratheon. We must remind these Lords of the oaths they swore, and the cost of breaking them.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Borros Baratheon''': If I do as your mother bids, which one of my daughters will you wed, boy?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lucerys''': My lord, I am not free to marry. I'm already betrothed. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Borros Baratheon''': So you come with empty hands. Go home, pup. And tell your mother that the Lord of Storm's End is not some dog that she can whistle up at need to set against her foes.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lucerys''': I shall take your answer to the Queen, my lord.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Wait, my Lord Strong. Did you really think that you could just fly about the realm trying to steal my brother's throne at no cost?&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lucerys''': I will not fight you. I came as a messenger, not a warrior.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': A fight would be little challenge. No. I want you to put out your eye. As payment for mine. ''[he tosses a dagger to Lucerys]'' One will serve. I would not blind you. Plan to make a gift of it to my mother.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lucerys''': No. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Then you are craven as well as a traitor.&lt;/div&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Borros Baratheon''': Not here. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': ''[charges at Lucerys]'' Give me your eye or I will take it, bastard!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Borros Baratheon''': ''[storms to his feet]'' Not in my hall! The boy came as an envoy, I will not have bloodshed beneath my roof. Take Prince Lucerys back to his dragon. ''Now''.&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Vhagar, NO! ''[Vhagar consumes Lucerys Velaryon and Arrax, marking the beginning of the Dance of the Dragons]''&lt;/div&gt;

==Season 2==

=== ''[[w:A Son for a Son|A Son for a Son]]'' [2.01] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Cregan Stark''': Duty is sacrifice. It eclipses all things; even blood. All men of honor must pay its price. The North owes a great duty to the Seven Kingdoms. One older than any oath. Since the days of the First Men, we have stood as guardians against the cold and the dark. Through its long tradition, the Night's Watch cultivated its strength from doomed men who had their life as their only possession. But my ancestor, Torrhen Stark, began a tradition by making an offering at the onset of winter: one in ten men from our household was to be chosen to fortify the Watch. This is not a sentence, but an honor. A duty embraced by all who serve the North. Even by mine own kin. The North must stand ready. '''Winter is coming'''.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': The realm will soon tear itself apart if men do not remember the oath sworn to King Viserys and to his rightful heir.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Cregan Stark''': Starks do not forget their oaths, my prince. But you must know that my gaze is forever torn between north and south. In winter, my duty to the Wall is even more dire than the one I owe to King's Landing. I need my men here.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': Whilst your men guard against wildings and weather, the Hightowers plan to usurp the throne. If my mother is to defend her claim to hold the realm united, she needs an army. War is coming to the whole of the realm, my lord. We cannot wage it without the support of the North.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Cregan Stark''': My father brought King Jaehaerys and Queen Alysanne to see the Wall. His Grace stood at this very outlook and watched as their dragons, the greatest power in the world, refused to cross it. Do you think my ancestors built a seven-hundred foot wall of ice to keep out snow and savages?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': What does it keep out?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Cregan Stark''': Death.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': It was a raven that brought me news of Laena's death. I existed for weeks in torment, refusing to believe what I'd been told. It was only when I saw my daughter's mortal remains that I could begin to mourn her. A raven has told Rhaenyra that her son is dead. She needs to know it for certain.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': She was a fool to go alone. What if Aemond were to happen upon her?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Then I would pity Aemond. The queen was wise to recuse herself. She has not acted on the vengeful impulse that others might've.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': If you'd have acted when you had the chance, Aegon's line would be extinguished and Luke would be alive.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Erryk''': ''[after Mysaria is arrested on Daemon's orders]'' Forgive me, my prince, but the lady speaks the truth. She was no agent of the Hightowers.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': What's it to you? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Erryk''': A matter of honor.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Was it honor that made you stand by and watch as the Hightowers usurped the throne? You and your traitorous twin?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Erryk''': No, my prince. I'm shamed by it. It's why I abandoned the Kingsguard and my brother and came here.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I don't care. Aegon was in your grasp. You should've killed him yourself.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Erryk''': Arryk and I were named to the Kingsguard at just eight and ten. And we swore the same oath: to defend the whole of the royal family. So what were we to do when they turned against one another?&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': My brother is hostage to my grandsire and mother, and they tell him that a war of dragons can yet be avoided. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': 'Tis inevitable. They must see that. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Otto fears to upset the order of things. And Alicent is simply angry. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': Angry? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': She blames me for starting this war after she plotted with my father's council to usurp his throne. &quot;Her Grace&quot; speaks with two tongues. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': She has a gentle heart. And Rhaenyra is a cunning spider. Long ago, she drew Alicent into her web, intoxicated her. It is not your mother's fault. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': She holds love for our enemy. That makes her a fool.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Helaena''': They killed the boy.&lt;/div&gt;

=== ''[[w:Rhaenyra the Cruel|Rhaenyra the Cruel]]'' [2.02] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': ''[smashing model of Valyria, screaming]'' I'LL KILL THEM! I'LL KILL THEM ALL! Traitors and villains! They dare strike at me!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Servant 1''': Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''':''[pointing sword at servant 1]'' I am the king!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Servant 1''': Your Grace! Yes, yes.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''':''[pointing sword at servant 2]'' I am the king!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Servant 2''': Yes, Your Grace. Uh, please, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''':''[looking back at model]'' Traitors and villains! Fire from the sky. This is war! I declare war! I declare war!&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': And where were the members of this council while the murderer threatened their king?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Tyland''': Were you also threatened, Your Grace?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': I COULD HAVE BEEN!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': My son is my legacy! My son is heir to the Iron Throne! ''[addressing Criston]'' And where were you, the Lord Commander of my Kingsguard?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': I was abed, Your Grace, having ordered the night's watch.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Abed. ''ABED!'' Instead of safeguarding the sanctity of my family!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': This is not the time for blind accusations, Your Grace. We’ll know who did this soon enough.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Who did this? Who d-What? Is there any question who did this? Who would do this save the bitch queen of bastards, the smug cunt of Dragonstone! There she sits, across the bay, on her rock, laughing at me, she's fucking laughing at me!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': When the people share our grief, they draw closer to us.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Helaena''': I don't want them closer. I don't know them.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Sometimes, we have to pretend.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Helaena''': Why?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': We are representatives of the throne. We have a duty.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Bartimos Celtigar''': It must be said that the damage to our position is immeasurable, at a time when we most need loyalty to our cause.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': But it's a lie. Having lost my own son, that I would inflict such a thing on Helaena, of all people... an innocent.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': The death of Prince Lucerys was a shock and an insult. A mother so aggrieved might, naturally, seek relief in retribution.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Are you suggesting, Ser Alfred, that my grief drove me to order the ''decapitation'' of a child?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': I merely thought, perhaps, an action taken in haste...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': Mind yourself.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Do you accept me as your queen and ruler? Or do you cling, even now, to what you think you lost?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': What I think I lost?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You did not lose it. You gave it away. Because you thought only and ever of your own glory, and not of my father in his grief, who needed you. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Your father was a coward who knew I was the stronger son, that I was the leader of men and he was afraid to be seen in my shadow.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Is that what you understand of your own brother?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Oh, you know him better than I do, who was raised by his side? Do you believe he made you heir because of your great wisdom? Because of your virtue?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': How dare you...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Or did he merely use you as a tool to put me in my place because he was afraid of me? Because he knew your legacy, unlike mine, would never outshine his own.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': He was not afraid of you, Daemon! He could not trust you any more than I can trust you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': He was a fool who sought greatness but shrank from spilling blood to achieve it. And I see you will suffer the same fate.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': I was brought to Westeros with nothing. I toiled in service, I stole. I sold my own body for coin or bread. And I listened. I collected confidences. I made myself valuable to powerful men. Bit by bit, I earned my living. A house, a household, a home. Then they set it all aflame.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Who did?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': The Hightowers, I can only assume. The Hand did not like it when I showed my teeth. But I thank him for it. For too long, I made it my aim to be of consequence. But now, I see that was the wish of a child. Daemon. Otto Hightower. Makes no difference. They will never accept me. I might as well have remained a whοre.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': ''[after learning Aegon and Ser Criston's plan to assassinate Rhaenyra]'' Instead of judgment, you display impetuousness, and diminish us in the eyes of our enemy! Ill-considered, trifling! Do you never think of your father? His forbearance? His judiciousness? His... his dignity. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Fuck dignity! I want revenge. My father is dead.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': He is, and we are the poorer for it. He was right about you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': He made me King.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': '' [laughs]'' Is that what you think?&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Burning Mill|The Burning Mill]]'' [2.03] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Jasper Wylde''': The Blackwoods and the Brackens have feuded for centuries. This is nothing more than an excuse for them to indulge their ancient grudge. It's no true war.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Call it what you will. I call it war. And so will Dragonstone.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': The young men have taken the bit in their teeth. They wish to punish, to avenge. Soon, they will not even remember what it was that began the war in the first place.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': That is easy enough. They usurped my throne.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': That is one answer. Or was it when the child was beheaded? Or when Aemond killed Luke? Or when Luke took Aemond's eye? We teeter now at the point where none of it will matter. And the desire to kill and burn takes hold and reason is forgotten. There may be another way. Alicent Hightower. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': When last we met, Alicent said I would make a fine queen. You've seen what has happened since then. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': She came to me in the hours after your lord father's death. She knows war is coming and that it'll be savage beyond all compare. There is no war so hateful to the gods as a war between kin. And no war so bloody as a war between dragons.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I'm claiming Harrenhal.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Simon Strong''': Apparently so. ''[walks over to Daemon and goes to one knee]'' I, Ser Simon Strong, castellan of Harrenhal, pledge fealty to Rhaenyra of House Targaryen, First of Her Name. I swear this by the old gods and the new. Supper is venison with black cabbage and peas. No redcurrant. Sorry about that.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': ''[encountering Daemon in Harrenhal's godswood]'' You will die in this place.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Helaena''': I feel sad about Jaehaerys. But I ought not to, I think. People die all the time, especially babes. They're so little, so they're taken so easily.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Sadness is a condition of motherhood.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Helaena''': There's naught to be gained from it. That horrid procession where the smallfolk all stared at me. I warrant they thought I had no more right to grief than they do. Surely they lose their babes more than highborn ladies.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': The Stranger comes for us all, queen and commoner. You have as much claim to grief as anyone.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': We watched the tourney together, you and I, the day my brother was born. We knew, even then, that men trained up for battle are eager to fight, to seek blood and glory. But you are ... I know you do not have that desire within you. Rhaenys has counseled me. She said she saw in you a wish to avert the worst of what may now come. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': So, you've come to surrender then? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I have come to see if we may uncover some path towards peace. My dragons are restless. They smell battle. But if you and I may come to terms... &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': There are no terms now. You have no army, your allies turn from you when they hear of your depravity, your hands are bloodied in a crime I could never have imagined you...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The trespass was not mine. Think what you will. I am a mother, too, and you have yet to answer for the murder of my son. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': I repudiate that act with all my heart. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Of course, you do. And the usurping of my rightful inheritance? Have you now stooped so low that you will countenance the suffering and death of ''thousands'' in order that your feckless son... &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Your father changed his mind. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Oh, so you say. And so your father has proclaimed to the realm. I saw the king that night. Mere hours before I left him, he had affirmed ''my'' right to the throne. A right he upheld ''steadfastly'' every day of his life after my mother died. And yet, you will maintain that his mind was changed in an instant?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': I will.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You lie.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': No, Rhaenyra.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': My father loved me, Alicent, and I believe he loved you, too. Did you betray him at the very last? When was your plan first laid? Was your ambition so keen...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': He changed his mind, Rhaenyra! He changed his mind. I swear this to you on the memory of my mother. I have been, at times, unkind, but never untrue. I pronounced before all gathered in that room that you would make a fine queen. Do you think me capable of such naked deceit?&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Red Dragon and the Gold|The Red Dragon and the Gold]]'' [2.04] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': ''[after hearing about Aemond's secret dialogue with Cole]'' The two of you have been plotting without my authority?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': ''[in High Valyrian]'' You had more pressing matters to attend to. Such as holding court, choosing your sobriquet, and naming imbecilic lickspittles to our Kingsguard. Do you have a wiser strategy, my king? If so, you should voice it to your council. We all await your answer.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': If I may be so bold, my Queen, you have not seemed yourself of late.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Only weeks ago, my lord husband was alive, and the realm was at peace. Now, I've barely had the hours to grieve one tragedy before suffering the next. I regret if I have not been myself.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Hmmm. ''[examines several books on the table between them]'' I did not know you shared your lord husband's love for the histories.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': If not his love, certainly an abiding interest. The voices of history guided Viserys. He knew his wisdom could only reach so far.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Do you think that is why he changed his mind, in the end? No matter how suited he thought Rhaenyra for the crown, the, uh, voices of history, as you say, would have told him how the realm would react to her succession.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': It was impossible to know what steered his thoughts in those final hours.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Do you now doubt his intentions?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Rhaenyra's supporters will believe what they wish, and so will Aegon's. The war will be fought, many will die, and the victor will eventually ascend the throne. The significance of Viserys's intentions died with him.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You are a strange kind of woman.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': I'm no woman at all. I'm a barn owl, cursed to live in human form.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': An enemy host, growing in constitution, marches somewhere, in the vastness of the Crownlands. We could, perhaps, act if we had a host of our own. Or someone here to lead us.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': Mind your tongue, Ser Alfred.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': Does it speak falsely, my prince? This council is rudderless.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenys''': I'm doing my best to steer it, Ser Alfred.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': Why should your voice be any louder than ours, Princess? The Queen did not name you Hand. It is her voice, and that of the King Consort, that we need to raise alliances and command our vassals. But they are gone.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': What has come of this council?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': My lord...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''':  Our enemy is on the march. Is there naught to be done in the absence of the queen, but to grouse and claw for power? We do not know the queen's doings. But we must trust that she seeks the same as each of us at this table. An end to this conflict.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': It was my hope that once enthroned, you would honor the burden of your new duties, be silent, and strive to learn from the more studied minds around you. In the hope that you might be half the king your father was. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Tread carefully. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Or what? You'll hang me, as you did your ratcatchers? Or have me banished, as you did your Hand? I ruled in your father's absence throughout his long illness, and Otto Hightower was as cunning a statesman as ever lived. You should humbly be seeking our opinions and counsel. You have no idea the sacrifices that were made to put you on that throne. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': What would you have me do, Mother? &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Do simply what is needed of you. ''Nothing''.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt; 
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': ''[to the Green host]'' On your feet! To Rook's Rest! To battle!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': ''[to Criston]'' It's broad daylight! We must hold here and ready ourselves to lay siege at nightfall. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': We shall move now and strike by day, they will not expect it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': They will not expect it because it is fucking madness. Did you forget the little encounter we had on the road to Rosby?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': I did not.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': Dragonstone and their dragons are just across the bay. What? Grown tired of living, have you?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': Are you afraid, Ser?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': Worse. I'm rational. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': We advance.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:Regent (House of the Dragon)|Regent]]'' [2.05] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Do you take issue with me, Ser Alfred?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': My loyalty to you is proven, my queen.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Your loyalty, perhaps, but not your willingness to give me deference in a time of war.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Alfred Broome''': I could never doubt your capability, or your quickness of mind. It is merely that the gentler sex, heretofore, has not been much privy to the strategies of battle, or their execution.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': There has been peace in our lifetime. You've seen no more battles than I have.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I came here to raise swords, not corpses.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Willem Blackwood''': But now you see what my house has known for generations. They are pigheaded, intransigent. They would rather burn than succumb.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Exactly the kind of men I need. It may yet be possible, I think, for both of us to achieve our ends.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Willem Blackwood''': We have fought them for an age and more.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Then perhaps you could try less fighting and more persuading.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Willem Blackwood''': They are unyielding in battle. But every man has a weakness.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You take my meaning, then. There are things the Crown itself must not been seen to do. Show them your worst.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The way they spoke at my small council today.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': Do they hold you responsible for Rhaenys and her dragon?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I would rather they had. They speak around me, not to me. They would make me queen, but they wish to keep me here, confined.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': They betray their own smallness.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': In truth, I cannot fault them. I am now the sovereign. I cannot do as I please. And war has ever been for men to make.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': You are your father's chosen successor.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': He did not prepare me to fight. If I had been a son, a sword thrust into my hand the moment I could walk. Instead, I was given my father's cup, taught the name of every lord and castle between Storm's End and the Twins, but not the difference between hilt and foible. And they know it. And Daemon as well.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Kat''': Are we not beggars already? Have you been paid for those machines you were forced to build?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Hugh''': The king has promised payment.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Kat''': The king has lied! By all means, stay and wait for his empty promises, husband. With them, you can feed the mouths of ghosts.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You should address me as &quot;my king.&quot;&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Simon Strong''': But you're the prince.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': What would you call the husband of the Queen?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Simon Strong''': Well, the King...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': There it is, then.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Simon Strong''': ..consort.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': That last bit seems unnecessary, don't you think?&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:Smallfolk|Smallfolk]]'' [2.06] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Remind me of your place on the small council.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': You know very well I represented your father during the last years of his life, and I have been a councilor to Aegon.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': Capably so. My father's dead and Aegon is ... You served the realm well at a time of need. That need is ended. You are no longer obliged.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': It's not a matter of obligation. This council has need of a tempering voice.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': We have more than enough of those, if you ask me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': You have the impetuousness of youth and its arrogance, neither of which is to be desired in a king.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': I release you of your seat, such as it was. I'm sure you'll be much pleased to return to more domestic pursuits.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Have the indignities of your childhood not yet sufficiently been avenged?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': You have the gratitude of the crown.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Steffon Darklyn''': ''[after Rhaenyra suggests that he  become a dragonrider]'' I am but a man. The dragons are gods. Your Grace honors me beyond what I deserve.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You understand your peril, Ser Steffon? I do not compel you to do this. It has never been attempted before. To claim a dragon, you must also be prepared to die.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Steffon Darklyn''': I well understand the risk and I accept it with gladness. I swore to ward my queen with all my strength, and to give my blood for hers. That is my oath, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Then perhaps the gods will favor us.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': There's something wrong with me. Someone poisoned me. The food, the wine. Or else it's this swamp air, or...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': The ghost of Harren the Black moaning his curses from Kingspyre Tower?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Drivel! All of it! The ghosts, the curses, the blasted weirwood bed! I'm done with it!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': Ah, yes. It is your way, is it not? When something does not please you, you run. Dragonstone, the Stepstones, Pentos, Harrenhal.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I awake and I do not know where I've been.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': There are older things in this world than you or I, or living memory. You are not the player, but a piece on the board. As am I, for that matter.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I am not like you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': In some ways, no. You struggle to see there's an anger that blinds you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': She never even wanted it. The crown. She spared no thought to it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': Well, that's perhaps why your brother gave the crown to her. Perhaps those who strive for it are the least suited to wear it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Don't lecture me!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': Viserys never wanted it himself, if you recall. It came to him, and he did his best. It’s not a prize to be won, but a burden to bear.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Take heart, Your Grace, you've already written yourself into legend. You survived dragonfire. But I'm afraid you will never be whole. Orwyle has exhausted his abilities. He's bound your leg, but you will never run again. Your mind is all that remains to you. I do not say that gladly. I came screaming into the world in the bowels of one of Harren's great towers. My lungs were strong, but my foot so twisted that my father named it sorcery. Accusing a member of our household of casting maligned spells. Well. People will pity you either behind your back or in your presence. And they will stare at you, at you, or turn away. And they will underestimate you. And this will be your advantage.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': No, n… No.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Your brother rules in your place now, which means that your life is in danger. But I think you know that.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': ''[weakly]'' Help me.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I do not think I can win this war.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': I think you are tired.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': My own son questions my capabilities. He thinks I need Daemon at my side. And Daemon himself.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': He has ever done what suits Daemon.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': He was everything I wanted to be. Carefree. And dangerous. A man. And I was what he wanted. Cherished by my father and made my father's heir. We were halves of a whole.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': He's never been at peace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': He wished to possess me, but not to be possessed and to see me take hold, finally, of what he always believed to be his. I fear what he may now do. I fear he may have turned against me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': It is more his way to disappear.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': In either case, I have lost him and Caraxes with him. Rhaenys and her dragon are dead. I have Syrax and two young beasts. We cannot take on Vhagar alone. And I have no army.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': You have the Velaryon fleet and the men who fight in it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': It’s not enough. And even if we somehow prevailed, how will I rule a kingdom when my own son doubts me?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': You have me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You have my thanks. Truly.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': It was my father. I was still a child. He had his pleasure with me. And when, after many months of this, it became evident that his seed had taken root. ''[points to her groin]'' There is a scar here as well. I cannot bear children. He left me for dead. But I lived.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I'm so sorry.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': Swore to myself I would never trust another. And that oath has stood me well. This world is cold and cruel, and there are few in it who are steadfast. You, I think, are steadfast. You have seen me as worthy, as an equal, even. Because of that, I will serve you. I believe you are meant to be queen.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Red Sowing|The Red Sowing]]'' [2.07]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You stand before the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, with a dragon of House Targaryen.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': I had no design upon it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': What do you want?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': To learn the ways of dragonriders. And to serve my Queen. ''[kneels]'' Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': ''[approaches cautiously]'' You kneel quickly for a man so suddenly elevated.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': This Dragon came to me, not I to him. I have sweated blood in service to House Velaryon. I may appear lowborn, but I know much and more of service. And if the Gods call me to greater things, who am I to refuse them?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Stand. ''[Addam stands]'' What is your parentage?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': My mother was a shipwright. My father is no one of consequence.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': And your ancestors? Any of House Targaryen?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': We're not the sort of family to keep annals, Your Grace.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': What is your name?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': Addam.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You have done something I feared impossible, Addam. I am glad of it. Do you think you can get him to Dragonstone?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam''': I can try.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Seasmoke chose him. He surely has Targaryen blood in him somewhere. The dragon must sense it. There will be others. We will find riders for Vermithor and Silverwing.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': You trust this man?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': What choice do I have? He has a dragon. Without him, I have only Syrax who may give Aemond a second thought. The question is where to look. Targaryen blood was perhaps too thin in Ser Steffon Darklyn. If I can find others with a more direct line of breeding.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': Forgive me, Your Grace, but you are better served looking under the sheets and in the woodpiles. I once worked in a pleasure house where generations of Targaryen princelings had their revels. There are four score of their bastard progeny at least, that are known to me. There are sure to be more. Perhaps some here, on Dragonstone, the misbegotten offspring of your house.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You speak of the lowborn.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': They are as like to serve you as highborn lords or ladies, perhaps more.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': But in the highborn houses there is an ancient fealty. There is honor.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Mysaria''': Your royal half-brothers, Aegon and Aemond, whose blood is pure, who wage war against you for your throne, are they bound by honor? A common shipwright vows to serve you while your brothers seek to destroy you. The order of things has changed, Your Grace. Why not embrace it?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': For twenty years, the lords of this realm levied insults at my sons, behind my back. ''[pause]'' Well then. Let us raise an army of bastards.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': The lowborn claiming dragons, was it her idea? Lady Mysaria?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You were enthusiastic enough when Ser Steffon made his claim.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': He was the Lord Commander of the Queensguard, heir to the Dunfort. These people are...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Courageous.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': Mongrels!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Jace, think what is at stake.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': I know well what is at stake. House Targaryen is the blood of the dragon. If any may lay claim to it, what are we then?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The rightful rulers of the Seven Kingdoms.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': And what if one of your baseborn, silver-haired dragonriders decides ''he'' wants to rule the Seven Kingdoms? Did the Conqueror's Dream foretell ''that?''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': What else would you have me do? Prosecute a war, which we will lose, in which thousands will die? Or fly against Vhagar myself? Or perhaps you will fly against her on Vermax? Jace, with these riders, we can end a needless war. I may take my rightful place on my father's throne.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': And when you die?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You are my heir!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': Did you think I would have dark hair? When you took Harwin Strong into your bed, did you think I might favor him, or did it not cross your mind?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Jacaerys...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': I'm no fool, Mother! The proof is here for all to see! Yet I might argue my legitimacy to succeed you because I have a dragon. And now you say you will strip that from me too.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I mislike all of this.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': Then don't pursue it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': But I cannot gainsay that which the Gods have laid before me.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I used to think I knew what it was to claim a dragon, but I understand now that what I thought I knew is ash in the wind. Perhaps it is blood. Or worth. Or perhaps it’s something else. Each of you has left behind a life to answer this call. A life to which you might never return. If you survive, you will be transformed. No man or woman can face a dragon and be otherwise. Some of you may welcome the prospect of change, even death, given the alternatives: privation, starvation, war. This is our purpose, to end those hardships. For you, for your kin, for all the realm. With these two dragons added to our number, the enemy will have no choice but to give way. And peace will be restored, suffering will be ended, and without bloodshed gods willing.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Oscar Tully''': You'll forgive me, Your Grace. I am green in this sort of matter, as you so kindly point out, but it does seem to me that you've made rather a mess here, countenancing barbarities in the Queen's name.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Whose side are you on?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Oscar Tully''': The Riverlands are held together by oaths. House Tully swore an oath to King Viserys. We recognize the authority of the named heir, Queen Rhaenyra, and your own as her king consort.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Good. Then we shall go to face your vassals and you will call your banners to war.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Oscar Tully''': That might be difficult, my king.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Well, I was told they would come to heel when House Tully declared its allegiance.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Lord Oscar Tully''': That may be the case, though it is yet to be seen that they will heed my authority as young as it is. And there is another problem. They all hate you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I don't need their love. I need their swords.&lt;/div&gt;

===''[[w:The Queen Who Ever Was|The Queen Who Ever Was]]'' [2.08]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': I am the King. Why must I run?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Because the Prince Regent is going to kill you. You were in danger before, and now? He is thwarted. He is angry. There's no telling what he will do. We have an opportunity while he is away...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': An opportunity to push him out. Take me to my throne. And once he returns I shall take him prisoner.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': And what then? When Rhaenyra descends upon you with her seven dragons, and you without Vhagar, what then? I have, over the years, in anticipation of little bumps in the road, moved the greater part of Harrenhal's gold reserves to the Iron Bank of Braavos. We can live well, and remain until what is coming has passed.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': ''[laughs bitterly]'' You want to take me to Essos, to live with the goatfuckers.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': It's best to ''live'', I think, however you do it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': Is it? My dragon is dead. I am burned and disgusting and alone. And I'm a cripple...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': You're not alone.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': My cock is destroyed. Did they tell you that? Burst into flames like a sausage on a spit.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Do not despair, Your Grace, there are better days ahead. Let your brother and the pretender destroy themselves in blood and bitterness. And when they are spent, and their armies in tatters, we will return. And the people will rise up to meet us.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': I can't even piss without it running down my leg...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': They will be tired of endless deprivation and fear. They will hail the returning King. His father's true heir. Aegon the Victorious, risen from the ashes. Aegon the Peacemaker. Aegon the Rebuilder.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': ''[smiling, convinced]'' Aegon the Realm's Delight.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': ''[holding his sword at Ser Criston's throat]'' Do you think nothing of your oath, &quot;Lord Commander?&quot;&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': I think of nothing else, My Lord.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': A steward's son from Dorne fucking the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': Former Queen. She has broken no oaths, for all I may have done.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': I could send you to the Wall.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': You could. And stain the Hightower name for a generation. The King's mother and his Hand...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': She is my sister!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': She saved my life. Twice. Once from the headsman's axe and once from myself. Since then, she has been the beacon I follow. ''[Ser Gwayne sighs and lowers his sword]'' Do not think I have no shame in me, Ser. Desire for women has brought me grief after grief.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': Then resist it!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': Oh, would that it were so simple.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': Your brothers in the Kingsguard find a way.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': Do they? Perhaps they do. Or perhaps all men are corrupt. And true honor is a mist that melts in the morning.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Gwayne''': That is a bleak philosophy.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Criston''': I have no philosophy. Or rather, my philosophy was this. ''[picks up his sword]'' Protect the righteous and dispense justice upon the rest. But now? ''[lowers his sword]'' You saw what I saw. The dragons dance, and men are like dust under their feet. And all our fine thoughts, all our endeavors are as nothing. We march now toward our annihilation. To die will be a kind of relief, don't you think?&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': ''[pulling Helaena roughly by the arm]'' They have defiled our birthright, made commoners into dragonlords! It is a sin and must be punished!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': May I remind you your sister is still the queen?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': As you were once! And you see now what is the consequence of your weakness! We are in peril today more than yesterday!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Was it peril that moved you to burn the town of Sharp Point? Peril or basest fury at your own humiliation? ''[Pulls Helaena away]'' You wish to rule the Seven Kingdoms, but you rain ruin and death upon its smallfolk when you've been insulted because it makes you feel strong, and now you seek to corrupt your sister, of all our line, the gentlest and most deserving of your protection.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': And who will protect her if she cannot protect herself?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': And who will she be if her mind is broken?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aemond''': 'Tis no longer our rule that is threatened, our very lives! Would you not have us prevail?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Not like this. Not like this!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I wasn't expecting you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': That seems rather a lapse in foresight. ''[looks around at the gathered army]'' I see you have done well here.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': They are sworn to me. And not a moment too soon.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': And to whom are ''you'' sworn?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[in High Valyrian]'' The world is not what we thought it was. This war is just the beginning. '''Winter is coming.''' And with it, darkness and doom.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': ''[also in High Valyrian]'' You sound like my father.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I saw it. I saw that we cannot withstand it. And yet, somehow, we must. ''[switches back to Common]'' The Realm's only hope is a leader that can unite it, and my brother chose you. ''[bends the knee]'' You are the true Queen. Rhaenyra, First of Her Name, Protector of the Realm. I am meant to serve you. And all of these with me, until death, or the end of our story.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;''[The entire army behind Daemon bends the knee]''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': ''[in High Valyrian]'' Leave me again at your peril.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[rising]'' I could not. I have tried. My Queen. ''[turns and addresses the army]'' For every one of us who falls, a hundred of them! ''[draws his sword]'' There will be no mercy! We fight for our Queen!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': We join the blockade and are like to find ourselves in peril, sooner than late. I wish to set out on good terms with my First Mate.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': Have I been remiss in my duties?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': You've done what is asked of you, and more. But you are curt, silent. The men find you distant. You cannot lead if you do not inspire.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': I have not asked to lead, as you well know.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': You have been given a position to which all who serve me aspire.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': Forgive me, My Lord. I will endeavor to improve myself. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': I am trying to help you!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': You want to help me? Is this the &quot;help&quot; you offer after all these years? A reminder to be grateful?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': I meant no offense. You may go.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': Do you know what it was like for us? To grow up fatherless? To be sneered upon as bastards? Never sure of the bread to feed us? Do you know what hunger does to a boy? What grief does? Or shame?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': You are dismissed!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': I sold fish in the market from cold dawn until sunset, putting up my coppers to stave off the winter. And I watched the man who sired me walk past with his son and heir, with ''furs'' around his shoulders, choosing sweetmeats to eat after supper by the fire. And now that boy is dead. And his sister before him. And the heir that took ''his'' place. And now, now, ''now'' you remember I live! ''Now'' you wish to suddenly scatter the crumbs of your favor! I am an honorable man, and I will serve you because I must. But if it is all the same, I will decline any offers of ''help.'' If I survive this war, I will continue as I began. ''Alone.'' &lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Aemond''': Sister. We share the same blood, you and I. I know you wish no harm to anyone. But in a time like this, when the good of the realm depends on us… Our mother is not a dragonrider. She cannot understand that you and I have a truer call to heed. Come with me… to Harrenhal? We will lay waste to Daemon and his army. Let our enemy see that we will answer outrage with outrage.
:'''Helaena''': And if I refuse? Will you burn me as you did Aegon?
:'''Aemond''': That is a lie.
:'''Helaena''': I saw it. You burned him and you let him fall.
:'''Aemond''': What you say is treason.
:'''Helaena''': Aegon will be king again. He’s yet to see victory. He sits on a wooden throne. And you… you’ll be dead. You were swallowed up in the God’s Eye, and you were never seen again.
:'''Aemond''': I could have you killed.
:'''Helaena''': ''It wouldn’t change anything.''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Why have you come here?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Aemond will soon fly to join Cole in the Riverlands. When he's gone, Helaena as queen will be the Crown's authority. If you come then to King's Landing, I will see to it that our guards throw down their arms. We will open the gates, we will shed no blood. You will enter as a conqueror. Already you have the stronger hand. Once you take the throne, this senseless war must end.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': What of Aegon?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': He's broken beyond recognition. He lies in the dark, in pain and terror. He has many faults, but he still heeds his mother. I believe I can prevail upon him to bend the knee, if indeed...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': No! Still you defend him. Still you imagine you can have all you want without paying too high a price, a price I had no choice but to pay.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': What I want is to set things right.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': If I am to take the throne, I must put an end to the opposition. I must take Aegon's head. And I have to do it for all to see. You know this. However you may try to evade it, you know this. Choose. Will you shrink from what you set out to do? Or will you see it through and make your sacrifice? A son for a son. ''[after a long moment, Alicent nods]'' You are much changed. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Let us be done with this, please.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': And what do I do with you now?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': You let me go, to do what I promised. And you fly to the Red Keep in three days' time, and you take your throne. Or you take me for a liar. I have neither weapon nor armor. My life itself is forfeit. I cast myself on the mercy of a friend who once loved me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': History will paint you a villain. A cold queen grasping for power, and then defeated.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Let them think what they must. I am at last myself with no ambition greater than to walk where I please and to breathe the open air. To die unremarked and unnoticed and be free.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': You speak as if from a distant dream.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Come with me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': My part is here, whether I will or no. It was decided for me long ago.&lt;/div&gt;

==Season 3==
===''Salt and Sea, Fire and Blood'' [3.01]===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Larys''': Take heart, my king. These are dark hours, but... brighter days lie ahead.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Aegon''': ''[In pain]'' No. No. I'm the king of nothing. With raven shit for a throne and a cripple for a protector. Oh, I'm fucking pathetic.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I have to believe that Alicent's offer was genuine.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': It is a ruse, cloaked in stale friendship!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': The risk she took in coming here is beyond question...&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Jace''': And the risks she now asks you to take? To fly to the Greens' stronghold, based on her word alone? It is a trap, Mother, to lure you and Daemon into Vhagar's jaws!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Roderick Dustin''': ''[Tosses a severed head to Daemon]'' We have come to die for the dragon queen.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[Inspects the head]'' Very good. We've got more lions to hunt.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Gwayne''': There is another matter - one of our men has ravaged a village girl. I witnessed the events myself. Something must be done.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Criston''': Hang him, then, if you wish.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Gwayne''': I am not his Lord Commander. A punishment is due, yes, but also a statement to the men. That we are not beasts, but knights, and soldiers of honor.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Criston''': Look around you, Ser Gwayne. Look to the sky; to the horizon. Doom and ruin surround us. We will all become beasts before our end.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Gwayne''': Only if we abandon our principles.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam of Hull''': You have to be named a lord to get a castle.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ulf''': What's a knight get, then?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam of Hull''': A horse.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ulf''': What do I need with a fucking horse? I've got a dragon.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Addam of Hull''': You'd be Ser Ulf, and men would have to show you respect.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ulf''': Men would have to show me respect 'cause of the big fucking dragon!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Helaena''': Aemond's frightened, too. After he claimed Vhagar, he forgot what fear was. But he remembers now. He knows that if he has to face Rhaenyra's dragons, he'll die.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': I cannot fully mend the... breach, between us. But I do accept that it was of my making. I was fond of your mother. For... whatever we had together. I did try to provide a life for you; for your brother.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn of Hull''': A life, perhaps. But never a name.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Corlys''': ''[pause]'' I am sorry for it.&lt;/div&gt;

===''Queen's Landing'' [3.02] ===
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''[[w:Rhaenyra Targaryen|Rhaenyra]]''': ''[Sees Jacaerys brought in on a stretcher]'' What have you done? Jace. Jace. What have you done? ''[Sobbing]'' How could you? How could you do this? How? How could you do this to me! ''[Shaking his body]'' You answer me! How could you do this? You answer me, please!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Ser Lorent''': My queen... I have failed you. ''[Offers up his sword]'' My life must be forfeit.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': And what good would that do? Will it wake my son? Will it change the truth of his folly and yours? ''[Looks at Baela]'' And yours? All of you, who knew what Jacaerys had done and stood by... are your lives, too, not forfeit? Have you not betrayed your queen?&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': I have seen that your coming has been an omen of the end.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': The end of what?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': Many things. And the beginning of others.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I would thank you for your help, but I’m not sure yet what your purpose has been.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': I’ve done the queen a service. I put 40,000 rivermen at her call. Tell her… I want Harrenhal.&lt;/div&gt; I’ve lived there all my long life, and I’ve seen it given from hand to hand. And yet none seem to cherish it. Why should it not come to me?
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': You have neither name, nor title, nor noble husband. The crown is not in the habit of giving out castles to midwives.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': And is midwife the sum of what you think I am?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': I will speak with her. Perhaps there is… some other reward she may extend your way.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alys''': &quot;Some other reward.&quot; I ask for food and you offer me rubies. For all their worth… they will never satisfy my hunger. Go home, Daemon. ''[walks away]'' But do not come back here! Remember what I told you.&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alicent''': Rhaenyra Targaryen approaches, Ser Freddryk. She comes with Prince Daemon and more besides. The king has abdicated; the prince regent himself has fled the city. Will you fight and be burned, and King's Landing along with you, or will you suffer her to enter, and hope for peace?&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn of Hull''': ''[about Corlys]'' You... Y-You knew him, as a child.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Baela''': He was stern... but gentle. At least in my eyes. He loved my grandmother more than few men I have seen love their wives. It was for her sake, I think, that he tried to forget... about you.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;''[Alyn looks at her suspiciously]''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Baela''': Your brother told me.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn of Hull''': We were not mere memories to be forgotten.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Baela''': No. He is proud as well, to his detriment. Stiff of neck.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn of Hull''': ''[Chuckles]'' Ah. That side of him, I know. Knew.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Baela''': I will not say so, yet.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Alyn''': And your betrothed?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Baela''': We were children together. ''[pause]'' I'm tired of losing people, Alyn.&lt;/div&gt;
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[after battling Hightower soldiers in the Red Keep]'' Who else dares rise against us in our house?!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[Bringing in Otto Hightower]'' The rats in the Black Cells have grown uncommon big!&lt;/div&gt;

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': Aegon has fled, but our old friend can stand in his place.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Just get it over with, will you?&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': They’re watching. If you wish to rule, show them you do not waver.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': I don’t know if I can.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': Let Daemon do it. Spare me at least from being hacked at. &lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;''[Daemon unsheathes Dark Sister and hands it to Rhaenyra]''&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Otto''': If your father could see what it’s come to… he would never have imagined it.&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Rhaenyra''': Speak no more!&lt;/div&gt;
:&lt;div align=&quot;justify&quot;&gt;'''Daemon''': ''[whispering]'' ''In this moment, you will become queen.''&lt;/div&gt;

===''Rhaenyra Triumphant'' [3.03]===

===''Tumbleton'' [3.04]===

===TBA [3.05]===
===TBA [3.06]===
===TBA [3.07]===
===TBA [3.08]===

== Cast ==
{{cast listing|
* [[w:Paddy Considine|Paddy Considine]] - Viserys I Targaryen
* [[Matt Smith (actor)|Matt Smith]] - Daemon Targaryen
* [[w:Emma D'Arcy|Emma D'Arcy]] &lt;small&gt;(adult)&lt;/small&gt; / [[w:Milly Alcock|Milly Alcock]] &lt;small&gt;(teenage)&lt;/small&gt; - [[w:Rhaenyra Targaryen|Rhaenyra Targaryen]]
* [[w:Rhys Ifans|Rhys Ifans]] - Ser Otto Hightower
* [[w:Olivia Cooke|Olivia Cooke]] &lt;small&gt;(adult)&lt;/small&gt; / [[w:Emily Carey|Emily Carey]] &lt;small&gt;(teenage)&lt;/small&gt; - Alicent Hightower
* [[w:Steve Toussaint|Steve Toussaint]] - Lord Corlys Velaryon
* [[w:Eve Best|Eve Best]] - Rhaenys Targaryen
* [[w:Sonoya Mizuno|Sonoya Mizuno]] - Mysaria
* [[w:Fabien Frankel|Fabien Frankel]] - Ser Criston Cole
* [[w:Graham McTavish|Graham McTavish]] - Ser Harrold Westerling
* [[w:Matthew Needham|Matthew Needham]] - Larys Strong
* [[w:Jefferson Hall (actor)|Jefferson Hall]] - Lord Jason Lannister / Ser Tyland Lannister
* [[w:Harry Collett|Harry Collett]] - Jacaerys &quot;Jace&quot; Velaryon 
* [[w:Tom Glynn-Carney|Tom Glynn-Carney]] - Aegon II Targaryen
* [[w:Ewan Mitchell|Ewan Mitchell]] - Aemond Targaryen
* [[w:Bethany Antonia|Bethany Antonia]] - Lady Baela Targaryen
* [[w:Phoebe Campbell|Phoebe Campbell]] - Lady Rhaena Targaryen
* [[w:Phia Saban|Phia Saban]] - Helaena Targaryen
* [[w:Kurt Egyiawan|Kurt Egyiawan]] - Grand Maester Orwyle 
* [[w:Kieran Bew|Kieran Bew]] - Hugh Hammer 
* [[w:Abubakar Salim|Abubakar Salim]] - Alyn of Hull 
* [[w:Tom Taylor (actor)|Tom Taylor]] - Lord Cregan Stark
* [[w:Clinton Liberty|Clinton Liberty]] - Addam of Hull 
* [[w:Tom Bennett (actor)|Tom Bennett]] - Ulf White
* [[w:Ellora Torchia|Ellora Torchia]] - Kat 
* [[w:Freddie Fox (actor)|Freddie Fox]] - Ser Gwayne Hightower
* [[w:Gayle Rankin|Gayle Rankin]] - Alys Rivers 
* [[w:Simon Russell Beale|Simon Russell Beale]] - Ser Simon Strong 
* [[w:James Norton (actor)|James Norton]] - Lord Ormund Hightower 
* [[w:Joplin Sibtain|Joplin Sibtain]] - Ser Jon Roxton 
}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=11198330}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:House of the Dragon, The}}
[[Category:American fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:HBO shows]]
[[Category:Current shows]]
[[Category:Game of Thrones]]</text>
      <sha1>mj9w343n9kx3xru907dxmki7zpbyv03</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Albertina Nontsikelelo Sisulu</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>252730</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965186</id>
      <parentid>3900265</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T04:19:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Meritkosy</username>
        <id>3135448</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */  Added her wikipedia page</comment>
      <origin>3965186</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4041" sha1="aadm6ewedvv7vf0bnw85mt0efvznewc" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Albertina Sisulu.jpg|thumb|Albertina Sisulu in 2007]]
'''[[w:Albertina Sisulu|Nontsikelelo Albertina Sisulu née Thethiwe]]''' (21 October 1918 – 2 June 2011)  was a South African anti-apartheid activist, and the wife of fellow activist Walter Sisulu (1912–2003). She was affectionately known as &quot;Ma Sisulu&quot; throughout her lifetime by the South African public. In 2004 she was voted 57th in the SABC3's Great South Africans. She died on 2 June 2011 in her home in Linden, Johannesburg, South Africa, aged 92.

== Quotes ==  

* Women are the people who are going to relieve us from all this oppression and depression. The rent boycott that is happening in Soweto now [in the 1980s] is alive because of the women. It is the women who are on the street committees educating the people to stand up and protect each other
**https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/albertina-sisulu-100-years-apartheid-womens-rights/,'''7 Quotes in Honour of Albertina Sisulu’s 100th Birthday '''.

* We are each required to walk our own road and then stop, assess what we have learnt, and share it with others. It is only in this way that the next generation can learn from those who have walked before them. We can do no more than tell our story. Then it is up to them to make of it what they will.
**https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/albertina-sisulu-100-years-apartheid-womens-rights/,'''7 Quotes in Honour of Albertina Sisulu’s 100th Birthday '''. 

== Quotes about person/work == 
* She deserves so much credit for the quality of a life of service that Walter led. Her own sacrifice and service deserve as much of our respect and recognition. The naming of this Center after Walter is a tribute to her as well.
**http://www.mandela.gov.za/mandela_speeches/2003/031107_cardiac.htm,'''Address by Nelson Mandela at opening of Walter Sisulu Paediatric Cardiac Centre for Africa, Johannesburg'''. 
* Among these revolutionary giants was stalwart Albertina Sisulu who played a formative role in the opposition to apartheid and in building a non-racial, non-sexist and democratic South Africa...we celebrate the centenary anniversary of the life of Mama Sisulu – who took on the mantle of leadership during our darkest hours and remained a selfless servant of the people throughout her life. For her bold role in the fight for freedom, she suffered immensely at the hands of the apartheid regime. She was jailed several times for her political activities and constantly harassed by the apartheid’s security police.
**https://www.gov.za/blog/albertina-sisulu-honoured.'''Pinky Kekana. Albertina Sisulu honoured. 16 October 2018'''
* An inspirational leader. An activist. A passionate educator. A philanthropist. A woman, inspired by the idea that one can change the world, the idea that one can change the existing conditions of the people – that all South Africans are treated equal. A champion of the rights and emancipation of women.
** https://www.uj.ac.za/news/saluting-the-legacy-of-south-african-icon-albertina-sisulu/ '''Saluting the legacy of South African icon, Albertina Sisulu. 17 August 2018.'''

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons category|Albertina Sisulu}}
* [https://www.mandela.gov.za/mandela_speeches/2003/031107_cardiac.htm 'Address by Nelson Mandela at opening of Walter Sisulu Paediatric Cardiac Centre for Africa, Johannesburg' 7 November 2003]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20070926233739/http://www.uj.ac.za/index.asp?page=article&amp;code=7&amp;id=996 'Liberation leaders honoured for their contributions to democracy'12 April 2007]
* [http://www.sahistory.org.za/people/albertina-nontsikelelo-sisulu 'Albertina Sisulu history']
* [http://www.gov.za/blog/albertina-sisulu-honoured 'Pinky Kekana. Albertina Sisulu honoured. 16 October 2018']
{{Authority control}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Sisulu, Albertina}}
[[Category:Anti-apartheid activists]] 
[[Category:Women activists from South Africa]]
[[Category:Nurses]]
[[Category:Social activists]]
[[Category:1918 births]]
[[Category:2011 deaths]]
[[Category:Xhosa people]]</text>
      <sha1>aadm6ewedvv7vf0bnw85mt0efvznewc</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965188</id>
      <parentid>3965186</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T04:34:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Meritkosy</username>
        <id>3135448</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */  Added a quote</comment>
      <origin>3965188</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4403" sha1="4rq7ui9slwt1nb6kt6v0c6nko5mxmp0" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Albertina Sisulu.jpg|thumb|Albertina Sisulu in 2007]]
'''[[w:Albertina Sisulu|Nontsikelelo Albertina Sisulu née Thethiwe]]''' (21 October 1918 – 2 June 2011)  was a South African anti-apartheid activist, and the wife of fellow activist Walter Sisulu (1912–2003). She was affectionately known as &quot;Ma Sisulu&quot; throughout her lifetime by the South African public. In 2004 she was voted 57th in the SABC3's Great South Africans. She died on 2 June 2011 in her home in Linden, Johannesburg, South Africa, aged 92.

== Quotes ==  

* Women are the people who are going to relieve us from all this oppression and depression. The rent boycott that is happening in Soweto now [in the 1980s] is alive because of the women. It is the women who are on the street committees educating the people to stand up and protect each other
**https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/albertina-sisulu-100-years-apartheid-womens-rights/,'''7 Quotes in Honour of Albertina Sisulu’s 100th Birthday '''.

* We are each required to walk our own road and then stop, assess what we have learnt, and share it with others. It is only in this way that the next generation can learn from those who have walked before them. We can do no more than tell our story. Then it is up to them to make of it what they will.
**https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/albertina-sisulu-100-years-apartheid-womens-rights/,'''7 Quotes in Honour of Albertina Sisulu’s 100th Birthday '''.

* Although politics has given me a rough life, there is absolutely nothing 1 regret about what I have done and what has happened tome and my family throughout all these years. Instead, 1 have been strengthened and feel more of a woman than I would otherwise have felt if my life was different

**https://sahistory.org.za/archive/albertina-sisulu-freedom-fighter

== Quotes about person/work == 
* She deserves so much credit for the quality of a life of service that Walter led. Her own sacrifice and service deserve as much of our respect and recognition. The naming of this Center after Walter is a tribute to her as well.
**http://www.mandela.gov.za/mandela_speeches/2003/031107_cardiac.htm,'''Address by Nelson Mandela at opening of Walter Sisulu Paediatric Cardiac Centre for Africa, Johannesburg'''. 
* Among these revolutionary giants was stalwart Albertina Sisulu who played a formative role in the opposition to apartheid and in building a non-racial, non-sexist and democratic South Africa...we celebrate the centenary anniversary of the life of Mama Sisulu – who took on the mantle of leadership during our darkest hours and remained a selfless servant of the people throughout her life. For her bold role in the fight for freedom, she suffered immensely at the hands of the apartheid regime. She was jailed several times for her political activities and constantly harassed by the apartheid’s security police.
**https://www.gov.za/blog/albertina-sisulu-honoured.'''Pinky Kekana. Albertina Sisulu honoured. 16 October 2018'''
* An inspirational leader. An activist. A passionate educator. A philanthropist. A woman, inspired by the idea that one can change the world, the idea that one can change the existing conditions of the people – that all South Africans are treated equal. A champion of the rights and emancipation of women.
** https://www.uj.ac.za/news/saluting-the-legacy-of-south-african-icon-albertina-sisulu/ '''Saluting the legacy of South African icon, Albertina Sisulu. 17 August 2018.'''

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons category|Albertina Sisulu}}
* [https://www.mandela.gov.za/mandela_speeches/2003/031107_cardiac.htm 'Address by Nelson Mandela at opening of Walter Sisulu Paediatric Cardiac Centre for Africa, Johannesburg' 7 November 2003]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20070926233739/http://www.uj.ac.za/index.asp?page=article&amp;code=7&amp;id=996 'Liberation leaders honoured for their contributions to democracy'12 April 2007]
* [http://www.sahistory.org.za/people/albertina-nontsikelelo-sisulu 'Albertina Sisulu history']
* [http://www.gov.za/blog/albertina-sisulu-honoured 'Pinky Kekana. Albertina Sisulu honoured. 16 October 2018']
{{Authority control}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Sisulu, Albertina}}
[[Category:Anti-apartheid activists]] 
[[Category:Women activists from South Africa]]
[[Category:Nurses]]
[[Category:Social activists]]
[[Category:1918 births]]
[[Category:2011 deaths]]
[[Category:Xhosa people]]</text>
      <sha1>4rq7ui9slwt1nb6kt6v0c6nko5mxmp0</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>258245</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965263</id>
      <parentid>3830124</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:05:35Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965263</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="13139" sha1="a6warr8nqj3yu6vy7byjr4610l6omhw" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse}}''''' is a 2023 American [[w:Computer animation|computer-animated]] [[w:Superhero film|superhero film]] based on the [[w:Marvel Comics|Marvel Comics]] character Miles Morales / Spider-Man, produced by [[w:Columbia Pictures|Columbia Pictures]] and [[w:Sony Pictures Animation|Sony Pictures Animation]] in association with [[w:Marvel Entertainment|Marvel]], and distributed by [[w:Sony Pictures Releasing|Sony Pictures Releasing]]. It is a sequel to ''[[Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse]]''. In the film, Morales goes on an adventure with Gwen Stacy across the multiverse where he meets a new team of Spider-People, known as the Spider-Society, but comes into conflict with them over handling a new threat.
:''Directed by {{w|Joaquim Dos Santos}}, {{w|Kemp Powers}} and Justin K. Thompson. Written by {{w|Phil Lord and Christopher Miller|Phil Lord, Christopher Miller}} and {{w|David Callaham}}.''
{{film-stub}}

== [[w:Miles Morales|Miles Morales]] ==
*Okay, let's do this one last time. My name is Miles Morales. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last year and four months, I've been Brooklyn's one and only Spider-Man. And things are going great.
*So are you like a cow or a dalmatian?
*[From the Trailer] So, wait a minute. There's an elite crew with all the best Spider-People in it?
*Anyone can wear the mask. But how you wear it... that's what matters.
*Can this day get any damn weirder?! ''[sees Spider-Rex]'' I guess it can!
*Everyone keeps telling me how ''my story'' is supposed to go! Nah... '''I'mma do my own thing.''' Sorry [[w:Spider-Man 2099|man]], I'm going home!
* He... kicked his own butt.
*''[while fighting Spot]'' Can't you just act like a regular supervillain so I can catch you?
* Goodbye, Gwen.

== [[w:Spider-Woman (Gwen Stacy)|Gwen Stacy]] ==
* Let's do things differently this time. So differently. His name is Miles Morales. He was bitten by a radioactive spider, and he's not the only one. He hasn't always had it easy, and he's not the only one. And now he's on his own, and he's not the only one. You think you know the rest. You don't. I thought knew the rest, but I didn't. I didn't wanna hurt him, but I did. And... he's not the only one.
*[''fighting Renaissance Vulture''] Sorry, [[w:Mario|the only Italian]] I know is from [[w:Mario Kart|''Mario Kart'']].
*In every other universe, Gwen Stacy falls for Spider-Man. And in every other universe, it doesn't end well.
*Will you adopt me? ''['''Jessica:''' What?]'' What?
*I can't lose one more friend.
*We are supposed to be the good guys.
*I never found the right band to join, so I started my own, with a few old friends.
*[''Last lines''] You want in?

== [[w:Spider-Man|Peter B. Parker]] ==
*Come on. Go easy on the kid. He had a terrible teacher.
*You say, &quot;The fate of the multiverse,&quot; and my brain dies.
*If not for Uncle Ben, most of us wouldn't be here, Miles.
*''['''Mary Jane:''' Did you bring [[w:Spider-Girl (Mayday Parker)|our baby]] to another fight?]'' You asked me not to do it, so I didn't. I wouldn't.
*Miguel, this isn't what we talked about!
*Don't tell Mom.

== [[w:Spider-Man 2099|Miguel O'Hara]] ==
* You left a hole wide enough for guys like him to randomly get shot into the wrong dimension. Now I'm stuck putting everybody back where they belong before all of time and space collapses! [[Spider-Man: No Way Home|And don't even get me started]] on [[w:Doctor Strange (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|Doctor Strange]] and [[w:Peter Parker (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|the little ''nerd'']] on [[w:Multiverse (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|Earth-199999]]!
*''[self-narrating]'' My name is Miguel O'Hara. I'm this dimension's one and only Spider-Man... at least, I was. But I'm not like the others. I don't always like what I have to do, but I know I have to be one to do it. I've given up too much to stop now.
* Miles, there's moments in our stories that are the same for all of us. Some good. Some bad.
* You have a choice between saving one person and saving an entire world. ''Every'' world.
* All stations, stop what you're doing and stop Spider-Man!
* You can't run forever, kid!
* Everywhere you go, you're an anomaly! You're the ''original'' anomaly! ''['''Gwen:''' MIGUEL!]'' The spider that gave you your powers wasn't from your dimension! It was never supposed to bite you! ''['''Gwen:''' Miguel, don't!]'' There's a world out there with no Spider-Man to protect them because it bit you instead! You're not supposed to ''be'' Spider-Man! ''['''Miles:''' No, you're lying! I'm Spider-Man!]'' You're a MISTAKE! If you hadn't been bit, your Peter Parker would have lived! Instead, '''he died saving you!''' He would've stopped the collider before it ever went off... Spot wouldn't exist, and none of this... ''['''Miles:''' Peter!]'' ...would've happened. And all this time, '''''I have been the only one holding it all together!!''' ['''Peter:''' Miguel, GO EASY ON HIM!]'' You don't belong here -- ''you never did.''
* That's '''exactly''' what you are! You're just a kid who has '''''no... idea... WHAT HE'S DOING!!!'''''
* Miles, we all want to live the life we wish we had. Believe me, I have tried. And the harder I tried, the more damage I did. You can't have it all, kid. Being Spider-Man is a sacrifice. That's the job. That's what you signed up for.
*YOU BLEW ANOTHER HOLE IN THE MULTIVERSE!

== [[w:Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew)|Jessica Drew]] ==
*''['''Gwen:''' Are you…?]'' Oh, this? We don't know the sex yet. My husband wants it to be a surprise. He's really corny, but so hot.

== [[w:Spider-Punk|Hobie Brown]] ==
* A'ight, my name's Hobie -- Hobie Brown. I was bitten by a-- Wouldn't you like to know? You know what I mean? And for the last three years, I've been the one and only-- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You think I'm gonna show you my secret identity? Come out of it. That is, when I'm not playing shows, antagonizing fascists, staging unpermitted political actions/performing art pieces or having a laugh at the pub with the mandem. I'm not a role model. I was briefly a runway model. I hate the A.M! I hate the P.M! I hate labels! I'm not a hero -- because calling yourself a hero makes you a self-mythologizing narcissistic autocrat.
* ''['''Miles:''' How are you even cooler under the mask?]'' I was this cool the whole time.
* Here we go... ''['''Jessica:''' Hobie, you're not helping.]'' Good.
* Just for a record, I quit.
* This kid is an anarchist.
* ''[to Mayday]'' Taking a crap on the establishment, I salute you.
* Listen to me, bruv: the whole point of being Spider-Man is your independence. Being your own boss. You don't need all this!

== [[w:Spider-Man (Pavitr Prabhakar)|Pavitr Prabhakar]] ==
* Hey, who's the new guy?
* ''['''Miles:''' I'm sorry. Who are you?]'' I'm glad you asked, new guy. ''['''Miles:''' I’m not a new guy.]'' My name is Pavitr Prabhakar. And for the past six months… ''['''Miles:''' Six? And even he got a watch.]'' ''['''Gwen:''' Yeah, uh…]''
* Being Spider-Man is so easy. I wake up, skip the workout 'cause I'm naturally buff and I don't wanna get too big, y'know? Do almost nothing with my amazing hair... ''['''Miles:''' You don't use any product at all?]'' Just coconut oil, prayer, some genetics. Then I swing by school, don't really have to try, but I do anyway. I fight a few bad guys, feed a few stray dogs, quick break for a cup of chai with my Maya Auntie.
* What did you just say? ''&quot;Chai tea?!&quot;'' &quot;Chai&quot; ''means'' &quot;tea&quot;, bro! You're saying &quot;tea tea!&quot; Would I ask you for a coffee-coffee with a room of cream-cream?
* Then I hang out with my girlfriend, Gayatri. She's an extremely classy teenager. Hey, girl. Tonight, I was thinking... Aah, hello! Police Inspector Singh, this is your daughter, I do not know her. And to top it off, I live in the best possible Spider-Man city, Mumbattan. Quick tour. This is where the traffic is, this is where the traffic is, this is also where the traffic is, there's traffic here too. And this is where the British stole all of our stuff!

== [[w:Alternative_versions_of_Spider-Man#Spider-Byte_(Earth-22191)|Margo Kess / Spider-Byte]] ==
*''['''Miles:''' I'm Spider-Man.]'' Oh, no way! All of us are.

== Rio Morales ==
*For years, I've been taking care of this little boy. Making sure he's loved, that he feels like he belongs wherever he wants to be. He wants to go out into the world and do great big things. And what I worry about the most, is they won't look out for you like us.
*Wherever you go from here, you have to promise to take care of that little boy for me. Make sure he never forgets where he came from. And never doubts that he's loved. And he never lets anyone tell him that he doesn't belong there. You got to promise me, Miles.

== [[w:Spot (comics)|Dr. Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot]] ==
* I am the Spot.
* [From the Trailer] It’s not funny.
* I'm a scientist. Or I was. I am… Anyway, have you heard of Alchemax? I used to work there. I was considered handsome by scientist standards. I had a little accident. Now look at me! (Give me my foot. Oh, man.)
* I'm so sorry. First of all, I'm not even robbing you. I mean, this ATM machine doesn't even belong to you, right? This belongs to the bank. They're the real criminals.
* Unfortunately for both of us, this is skin.
* I'm gonna take everything from you, like you took everything from me. See you back home, Spider-Man.

== [[w:Vulture (Marvel Comics)|Adriano Toomes / Vulture]] ==
*Ciao, ragazzi. [ Translation: Bye, girl!]
* Che meravigliosa bellezza! [ Translation: what a wonderful beauty!]

== Dialogue ==
:'''Jefferson''': You know what, it's scary. He says these things that are so smart.
:'''Miles (as Spider-Man)''': Cool! Well, I guess I'll probably... ''[starts walking away]''
:'''Jefferson''': And he does these things that are so ''stupid.'' ''[Miles halts, eyes widened]'' I just don't want him to mess it up.
:'''Miles''': ''[backs up, under breath]'' Maybe get off the kid's ass.
:'''Jefferson''': I'm sorry, what?
:'''Miles''': What? Wha- I'm-- I don't know.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''The Spot''': You made me feel empty, like I had a hole inside me.
:'''Miles''': We all have holes.
:'''The Spot''': But now I found out what to fill up that hole with. MORE HOLES!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Metro Spider-Man''': There’s nowhere to run. My bad everybody, there was somewhere to run.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''George''': Parenting... It's a big-ass mystery.

== Voice Cast ==
* [[w:Miles Morales|Miles Morales / Spider-Man]] – {{w|Shameik Moore}}
:: Jeff and Rio's son / Aaron's nephew / Gwen's boyfriend

* {{w|Gwen Stacy}} / [[w:Spider-Woman (Gwen Stacy)|Spider-Gwen]] – [[Hailee Steinfeld]]
:: Shea's daughter / Miles' girlfriend

* [[w:Spider-Man|Peter Parker / Spider-Man]]: May and Ben's nephew and M.J.'s husband
** [[Jake Johnson]] (B. Parker)
** {{w|Daniel Kaluuya}} (Punk)
** {{w|Karan Soni}} (India)
** {{w|Andy Samberg}} (Scarlet)

* [[w:Spider-Man 2099|Miguel O'Hara]] – {{w|Oscar Isaac}}

* [[w:Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew)|Jessica Drew / Spider Woman]] – {{w|Issa Rae}}

* [[w:Jefferson Davis (comics)|Jefferson &quot;Jeff&quot; Davis-Morales]] – {{w|Brian Tyree Henry}}
:: Aaron's brother, Miles' dad, and Rio's husband

* {{w|Rio Morales}} – [[Lauren Vélez|Luna Lauren Velez]]
:: Miles' mom, Jeff's wife, and Aaron's sister-in-law

* [[w:Spot (comics)|Dr. Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot]] – {{w|Jason Schwartzman}}

* {{w|George Stacy}} – {{w|Shea Whigham}}
:: Gwen's dad and a police officer

* [[w:Alternative_versions_of_Spider-Man#Spider-Byte_(Earth-22191)|Margo Kress / Spider-Byte]] – {{w|Amandla Stenberg}}

* Ms. Weber – {{w|Rachel Dratch}}
:: A counselor at Miles' school

* [[w:Mary Jane Watson|Mary Jane &quot;M.J.&quot; Watson]] – Melissa Sturm
:: Peter B's wife / Mayday's mother

* [[w:Vulture (Marvel Comics)|Adriano Toomes / Vulture]] – {{w|Jorma Taccone}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|9362722|Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse}}

{{Spider-Man}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2023 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2023 American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:African-American superhero films]]
[[Category:African-American animated films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age comedy films]]
[[Category:Amercian animated coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:American children's animated action films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated films]]
[[Category:Theatrically released animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:Comic book films]]
[[Category:Spider-Man films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on Marvel Comics]]
[[Category:Best Animated Feature Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Animated films about uncle–nephew relationships]]
[[Category:Animated films about parallel universes]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Animated films set in Brooklyn]]
[[Category:Animated films set in New York City]]</text>
      <sha1>a6warr8nqj3yu6vy7byjr4610l6omhw</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965264</id>
      <parentid>3965263</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:06:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965264</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="13139" sha1="m7ay7a74rmtt0ruocz99l8ax2yqz2fl" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse}}''''' is a 2023 American [[w:Computer animation|computer-animated]] [[w:Superhero film|superhero film]] based on the [[w:Marvel Comics|Marvel Comics]] character Miles Morales / Spider-Man, produced by [[w:Columbia Pictures|Columbia Pictures]] and [[w:Sony Pictures Animation|Sony Pictures Animation]] in association with [[w:Marvel Entertainment|Marvel]], and distributed by [[w:Sony Pictures Releasing|Sony Pictures Releasing]]. It is a sequel to ''[[Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse]]''. In the film, Morales goes on an adventure with Gwen Stacy across the multiverse where he meets a new team of Spider-People, known as the Spider-Society, but comes into conflict with them over handling a new threat.
:''Directed by {{w|Joaquim Dos Santos}}, {{w|Kemp Powers}} and Justin K. Thompson. Written by {{w|Phil Lord and Christopher Miller|Phil Lord, Christopher Miller}} and {{w|David Callaham}}.''
{{film-stub}}

== [[w:Miles Morales|Miles Morales]] ==
*Okay, let's do this one last time. My name is Miles Morales. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last year and four months, I've been Brooklyn's one and only Spider-Man. And things are going great.
*So are you like a cow or a dalmatian?
*[From the Trailer] So, wait a minute. There's an elite crew with all the best Spider-People in it?
*Anyone can wear the mask. But how you wear it... that's what matters.
*Can this day get any damn weirder?! ''[sees Spider-Rex]'' I guess it can!
*Everyone keeps telling me how ''my story'' is supposed to go! Nah... '''I'mma do my own thing.''' Sorry [[w:Spider-Man 2099|man]], I'm going home!
* He... kicked his own butt.
*''[while fighting Spot]'' Can't you just act like a regular supervillain so I can catch you?
* Goodbye, Gwen.

== [[w:Spider-Woman (Gwen Stacy)|Gwen Stacy]] ==
* Let's do things differently this time. So differently. His name is Miles Morales. He was bitten by a radioactive spider, and he's not the only one. He hasn't always had it easy, and he's not the only one. And now he's on his own, and he's not the only one. You think you know the rest. You don't. I thought knew the rest, but I didn't. I didn't wanna hurt him, but I did. And... he's not the only one.
*[''fighting Renaissance Vulture''] Sorry, [[w:Mario|the only Italian]] I know is from [[w:Mario Kart|''Mario Kart'']].
*In every other universe, Gwen Stacy falls for Spider-Man. And in every other universe, it doesn't end well.
*Will you adopt me? ''['''Jessica:''' What?]'' What?
*I can't lose one more friend.
*We are supposed to be the good guys.
*I never found the right band to join, so I started my own, with a few old friends.
*[''Last lines''] You want in?

== [[w:Spider-Man|Peter B. Parker]] ==
*Come on. Go easy on the kid. He had a terrible teacher.
*You say, &quot;The fate of the multiverse,&quot; and my brain dies.
*If not for Uncle Ben, most of us wouldn't be here, Miles.
*''['''Mary Jane:''' Did you bring [[w:Spider-Girl (Mayday Parker)|our baby]] to another fight?]'' You asked me not to do it, so I didn't. I wouldn't.
*Miguel, this isn't what we talked about!
*Don't tell Mom.

== [[w:Spider-Man 2099|Miguel O'Hara]] ==
* You left a hole wide enough for guys like him to randomly get shot into the wrong dimension. Now I'm stuck putting everybody back where they belong before all of time and space collapses! [[Spider-Man: No Way Home|And don't even get me started]] on [[w:Doctor Strange (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|Doctor Strange]] and [[w:Peter Parker (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|the little ''nerd'']] on [[w:Multiverse (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|Earth-199999]]!
*''[self-narrating]'' My name is Miguel O'Hara. I'm this dimension's one and only Spider-Man... at least, I was. But I'm not like the others. I don't always like what I have to do, but I know I have to be one to do it. I've given up too much to stop now.
* Miles, there's moments in our stories that are the same for all of us. Some good. Some bad.
* You have a choice between saving one person and saving an entire world. ''Every'' world.
* All stations, stop what you're doing and stop Spider-Man!
* You can't run forever, kid!
* Everywhere you go, you're an anomaly! You're the ''original'' anomaly! ''['''Gwen:''' MIGUEL!]'' The spider that gave you your powers wasn't from your dimension! It was never supposed to bite you! ''['''Gwen:''' Miguel, don't!]'' There's a world out there with no Spider-Man to protect them because it bit you instead! You're not supposed to ''be'' Spider-Man! ''['''Miles:''' No, you're lying! I'm Spider-Man!]'' You're a MISTAKE! If you hadn't been bit, your Peter Parker would have lived! Instead, '''he died saving you!''' He would've stopped the collider before it ever went off... Spot wouldn't exist, and none of this... ''['''Miles:''' Peter!]'' ...would've happened. And all this time, '''''I have been the only one holding it all together!!''' ['''Peter:''' Miguel, GO EASY ON HIM!]'' You don't belong here -- ''you never did.''
* That's '''exactly''' what you are! You're just a kid who has '''''no... idea... WHAT HE'S DOING!!!'''''
* Miles, we all want to live the life we wish we had. Believe me, I have tried. And the harder I tried, the more damage I did. You can't have it all, kid. Being Spider-Man is a sacrifice. That's the job. That's what you signed up for.
*YOU BLEW ANOTHER HOLE IN THE MULTIVERSE!

== [[w:Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew)|Jessica Drew]] ==
*''['''Gwen:''' Are you…?]'' Oh, this? We don't know the sex yet. My husband wants it to be a surprise. He's really corny, but so hot.

== [[w:Spider-Punk|Hobie Brown]] ==
* A'ight, my name's Hobie -- Hobie Brown. I was bitten by a-- Wouldn't you like to know? You know what I mean? And for the last three years, I've been the one and only-- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You think I'm gonna show you my secret identity? Come out of it. That is, when I'm not playing shows, antagonizing fascists, staging unpermitted political actions/performing art pieces or having a laugh at the pub with the mandem. I'm not a role model. I was briefly a runway model. I hate the A.M! I hate the P.M! I hate labels! I'm not a hero -- because calling yourself a hero makes you a self-mythologizing narcissistic autocrat.
* ''['''Miles:''' How are you even cooler under the mask?]'' I was this cool the whole time.
* Here we go... ''['''Jessica:''' Hobie, you're not helping.]'' Good.
* Just for a record, I quit.
* This kid is an anarchist.
* ''[to Mayday]'' Taking a crap on the establishment, I salute you.
* Listen to me, bruv: the whole point of being Spider-Man is your independence. Being your own boss. You don't need all this!

== [[w:Spider-Man (Pavitr Prabhakar)|Pavitr Prabhakar]] ==
* Hey, who's the new guy?
* ''['''Miles:''' I'm sorry. Who are you?]'' I'm glad you asked, new guy. ''['''Miles:''' I’m not a new guy.]'' My name is Pavitr Prabhakar. And for the past six months… ''['''Miles:''' Six? And even he got a watch.]'' ''['''Gwen:''' Yeah, uh…]''
* Being Spider-Man is so easy. I wake up, skip the workout 'cause I'm naturally buff and I don't wanna get too big, y'know? Do almost nothing with my amazing hair... ''['''Miles:''' You don't use any product at all?]'' Just coconut oil, prayer, some genetics. Then I swing by school, don't really have to try, but I do anyway. I fight a few bad guys, feed a few stray dogs, quick break for a cup of chai with my Maya Auntie.
* What did you just say? ''&quot;Chai tea?!&quot;'' &quot;Chai&quot; ''means'' &quot;tea&quot;, bro! You're saying &quot;tea tea!&quot; Would I ask you for a coffee-coffee with a room of cream-cream?
* Then I hang out with my girlfriend, Gayatri. She's an extremely classy teenager. Hey, girl. Tonight, I was thinking... Aah, hello! Police Inspector Singh, this is your daughter, I do not know her. And to top it off, I live in the best possible Spider-Man city, Mumbattan. Quick tour. This is where the traffic is, this is where the traffic is, this is also where the traffic is, there's traffic here too. And this is where the British stole all of our stuff!

== [[w:Alternative_versions_of_Spider-Man#Spider-Byte_(Earth-22191)|Margo Kess / Spider-Byte]] ==
*''['''Miles:''' I'm Spider-Man.]'' Oh, no way! All of us are.

== Rio Morales ==
*For years, I've been taking care of this little boy. Making sure he's loved, that he feels like he belongs wherever he wants to be. He wants to go out into the world and do great big things. And what I worry about the most, is they won't look out for you like us.
*Wherever you go from here, you have to promise to take care of that little boy for me. Make sure he never forgets where he came from. And never doubts that he's loved. And he never lets anyone tell him that he doesn't belong there. You got to promise me, Miles.

== [[w:Spot (comics)|Dr. Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot]] ==
* I am the Spot.
* [From the Trailer] It’s not funny.
* I'm a scientist. Or I was. I am… Anyway, have you heard of Alchemax? I used to work there. I was considered handsome by scientist standards. I had a little accident. Now look at me! (Give me my foot. Oh, man.)
* I'm so sorry. First of all, I'm not even robbing you. I mean, this ATM machine doesn't even belong to you, right? This belongs to the bank. They're the real criminals.
* Unfortunately for both of us, this is skin.
* I'm gonna take everything from you, like you took everything from me. See you back home, Spider-Man.

== [[w:Vulture (Marvel Comics)|Adriano Toomes / Vulture]] ==
*Ciao, ragazzi. [ Translation: Bye, girl!]
* Che meravigliosa bellezza! [ Translation: what a wonderful beauty!]

== Dialogue ==
:'''Jefferson''': You know what, it's scary. He says these things that are so smart.
:'''Miles (as Spider-Man)''': Cool! Well, I guess I'll probably... ''[starts walking away]''
:'''Jefferson''': And he does these things that are so ''stupid.'' ''[Miles halts, eyes widened]'' I just don't want him to mess it up.
:'''Miles''': ''[backs up, under breath]'' Maybe get off the kid's ass.
:'''Jefferson''': I'm sorry, what?
:'''Miles''': What? Wha- I'm-- I don't know.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''The Spot''': You made me feel empty, like I had a hole inside me.
:'''Miles''': We all have holes.
:'''The Spot''': But now I found out what to fill up that hole with. MORE HOLES!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Metro Spider-Man''': There’s nowhere to run. My bad everybody, there was somewhere to run.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''George''': Parenting... It's a big-ass mystery.

== Voice Cast ==
* [[w:Miles Morales|Miles Morales / Spider-Man]] – {{w|Shameik Moore}}
:: Jeff and Rio's son / Aaron's nephew / Gwen's boyfriend

* {{w|Gwen Stacy}} / [[w:Spider-Woman (Gwen Stacy)|Spider-Gwen]] – [[Hailee Steinfeld]]
:: Shea's daughter / Miles' girlfriend

* [[w:Spider-Man|Peter Parker / Spider-Man]]: May and Ben's nephew and M.J.'s husband
** [[Jake Johnson]] (B. Parker)
** {{w|Daniel Kaluuya}} (Punk)
** {{w|Karan Soni}} (India)
** {{w|Andy Samberg}} (Scarlet)

* [[w:Spider-Man 2099|Miguel O'Hara]] – {{w|Oscar Isaac}}

* [[w:Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew)|Jessica Drew / Spider Woman]] – {{w|Issa Rae}}

* [[w:Jefferson Davis (comics)|Jefferson &quot;Jeff&quot; Davis-Morales]] – {{w|Brian Tyree Henry}}
:: Aaron's brother, Miles' dad, and Rio's husband

* {{w|Rio Morales}} – [[Lauren Vélez|Luna Lauren Velez]]
:: Miles' mom, Jeff's wife, and Aaron's sister-in-law

* [[w:Spot (comics)|Dr. Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot]] – {{w|Jason Schwartzman}}

* {{w|George Stacy}} – {{w|Shea Whigham}}
:: Gwen's dad and a police officer

* [[w:Alternative_versions_of_Spider-Man#Spider-Byte_(Earth-22191)|Margo Kress / Spider-Byte]] – {{w|Amandla Stenberg}}

* Ms. Weber – {{w|Rachel Dratch}}
:: A counselor at Miles' school

* [[w:Mary Jane Watson|Mary Jane &quot;M.J.&quot; Watson]] – Melissa Sturm
:: Peter B's wife / Mayday's mother

* [[w:Vulture (Marvel Comics)|Adriano Toomes / Vulture]] – {{w|Jorma Taccone}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|9362722|Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse}}

{{Spider-Man}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2023 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2023 American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:African-American superhero films]]
[[Category:African-American animated films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age comedy films]]
[[Category:Amercian coming-of-age animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated action films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated films]]
[[Category:Theatrically released animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:Comic book films]]
[[Category:Spider-Man films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on Marvel Comics]]
[[Category:Best Animated Feature Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Animated films about uncle–nephew relationships]]
[[Category:Animated films about parallel universes]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Animated films set in Brooklyn]]
[[Category:Animated films set in New York City]]</text>
      <sha1>m7ay7a74rmtt0ruocz99l8ax2yqz2fl</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965265</id>
      <parentid>3965264</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:06:57Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965265</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="13139" sha1="lxy15n6ruqay1vkaqxtcrmey29qahlg" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse}}''''' is a 2023 American [[w:Computer animation|computer-animated]] [[w:Superhero film|superhero film]] based on the [[w:Marvel Comics|Marvel Comics]] character Miles Morales / Spider-Man, produced by [[w:Columbia Pictures|Columbia Pictures]] and [[w:Sony Pictures Animation|Sony Pictures Animation]] in association with [[w:Marvel Entertainment|Marvel]], and distributed by [[w:Sony Pictures Releasing|Sony Pictures Releasing]]. It is a sequel to ''[[Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse]]''. In the film, Morales goes on an adventure with Gwen Stacy across the multiverse where he meets a new team of Spider-People, known as the Spider-Society, but comes into conflict with them over handling a new threat.
:''Directed by {{w|Joaquim Dos Santos}}, {{w|Kemp Powers}} and Justin K. Thompson. Written by {{w|Phil Lord and Christopher Miller|Phil Lord, Christopher Miller}} and {{w|David Callaham}}.''
{{film-stub}}

== [[w:Miles Morales|Miles Morales]] ==
*Okay, let's do this one last time. My name is Miles Morales. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last year and four months, I've been Brooklyn's one and only Spider-Man. And things are going great.
*So are you like a cow or a dalmatian?
*[From the Trailer] So, wait a minute. There's an elite crew with all the best Spider-People in it?
*Anyone can wear the mask. But how you wear it... that's what matters.
*Can this day get any damn weirder?! ''[sees Spider-Rex]'' I guess it can!
*Everyone keeps telling me how ''my story'' is supposed to go! Nah... '''I'mma do my own thing.''' Sorry [[w:Spider-Man 2099|man]], I'm going home!
* He... kicked his own butt.
*''[while fighting Spot]'' Can't you just act like a regular supervillain so I can catch you?
* Goodbye, Gwen.

== [[w:Spider-Woman (Gwen Stacy)|Gwen Stacy]] ==
* Let's do things differently this time. So differently. His name is Miles Morales. He was bitten by a radioactive spider, and he's not the only one. He hasn't always had it easy, and he's not the only one. And now he's on his own, and he's not the only one. You think you know the rest. You don't. I thought knew the rest, but I didn't. I didn't wanna hurt him, but I did. And... he's not the only one.
*[''fighting Renaissance Vulture''] Sorry, [[w:Mario|the only Italian]] I know is from [[w:Mario Kart|''Mario Kart'']].
*In every other universe, Gwen Stacy falls for Spider-Man. And in every other universe, it doesn't end well.
*Will you adopt me? ''['''Jessica:''' What?]'' What?
*I can't lose one more friend.
*We are supposed to be the good guys.
*I never found the right band to join, so I started my own, with a few old friends.
*[''Last lines''] You want in?

== [[w:Spider-Man|Peter B. Parker]] ==
*Come on. Go easy on the kid. He had a terrible teacher.
*You say, &quot;The fate of the multiverse,&quot; and my brain dies.
*If not for Uncle Ben, most of us wouldn't be here, Miles.
*''['''Mary Jane:''' Did you bring [[w:Spider-Girl (Mayday Parker)|our baby]] to another fight?]'' You asked me not to do it, so I didn't. I wouldn't.
*Miguel, this isn't what we talked about!
*Don't tell Mom.

== [[w:Spider-Man 2099|Miguel O'Hara]] ==
* You left a hole wide enough for guys like him to randomly get shot into the wrong dimension. Now I'm stuck putting everybody back where they belong before all of time and space collapses! [[Spider-Man: No Way Home|And don't even get me started]] on [[w:Doctor Strange (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|Doctor Strange]] and [[w:Peter Parker (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|the little ''nerd'']] on [[w:Multiverse (Marvel Cinematic Universe)|Earth-199999]]!
*''[self-narrating]'' My name is Miguel O'Hara. I'm this dimension's one and only Spider-Man... at least, I was. But I'm not like the others. I don't always like what I have to do, but I know I have to be one to do it. I've given up too much to stop now.
* Miles, there's moments in our stories that are the same for all of us. Some good. Some bad.
* You have a choice between saving one person and saving an entire world. ''Every'' world.
* All stations, stop what you're doing and stop Spider-Man!
* You can't run forever, kid!
* Everywhere you go, you're an anomaly! You're the ''original'' anomaly! ''['''Gwen:''' MIGUEL!]'' The spider that gave you your powers wasn't from your dimension! It was never supposed to bite you! ''['''Gwen:''' Miguel, don't!]'' There's a world out there with no Spider-Man to protect them because it bit you instead! You're not supposed to ''be'' Spider-Man! ''['''Miles:''' No, you're lying! I'm Spider-Man!]'' You're a MISTAKE! If you hadn't been bit, your Peter Parker would have lived! Instead, '''he died saving you!''' He would've stopped the collider before it ever went off... Spot wouldn't exist, and none of this... ''['''Miles:''' Peter!]'' ...would've happened. And all this time, '''''I have been the only one holding it all together!!''' ['''Peter:''' Miguel, GO EASY ON HIM!]'' You don't belong here -- ''you never did.''
* That's '''exactly''' what you are! You're just a kid who has '''''no... idea... WHAT HE'S DOING!!!'''''
* Miles, we all want to live the life we wish we had. Believe me, I have tried. And the harder I tried, the more damage I did. You can't have it all, kid. Being Spider-Man is a sacrifice. That's the job. That's what you signed up for.
*YOU BLEW ANOTHER HOLE IN THE MULTIVERSE!

== [[w:Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew)|Jessica Drew]] ==
*''['''Gwen:''' Are you…?]'' Oh, this? We don't know the sex yet. My husband wants it to be a surprise. He's really corny, but so hot.

== [[w:Spider-Punk|Hobie Brown]] ==
* A'ight, my name's Hobie -- Hobie Brown. I was bitten by a-- Wouldn't you like to know? You know what I mean? And for the last three years, I've been the one and only-- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You think I'm gonna show you my secret identity? Come out of it. That is, when I'm not playing shows, antagonizing fascists, staging unpermitted political actions/performing art pieces or having a laugh at the pub with the mandem. I'm not a role model. I was briefly a runway model. I hate the A.M! I hate the P.M! I hate labels! I'm not a hero -- because calling yourself a hero makes you a self-mythologizing narcissistic autocrat.
* ''['''Miles:''' How are you even cooler under the mask?]'' I was this cool the whole time.
* Here we go... ''['''Jessica:''' Hobie, you're not helping.]'' Good.
* Just for a record, I quit.
* This kid is an anarchist.
* ''[to Mayday]'' Taking a crap on the establishment, I salute you.
* Listen to me, bruv: the whole point of being Spider-Man is your independence. Being your own boss. You don't need all this!

== [[w:Spider-Man (Pavitr Prabhakar)|Pavitr Prabhakar]] ==
* Hey, who's the new guy?
* ''['''Miles:''' I'm sorry. Who are you?]'' I'm glad you asked, new guy. ''['''Miles:''' I’m not a new guy.]'' My name is Pavitr Prabhakar. And for the past six months… ''['''Miles:''' Six? And even he got a watch.]'' ''['''Gwen:''' Yeah, uh…]''
* Being Spider-Man is so easy. I wake up, skip the workout 'cause I'm naturally buff and I don't wanna get too big, y'know? Do almost nothing with my amazing hair... ''['''Miles:''' You don't use any product at all?]'' Just coconut oil, prayer, some genetics. Then I swing by school, don't really have to try, but I do anyway. I fight a few bad guys, feed a few stray dogs, quick break for a cup of chai with my Maya Auntie.
* What did you just say? ''&quot;Chai tea?!&quot;'' &quot;Chai&quot; ''means'' &quot;tea&quot;, bro! You're saying &quot;tea tea!&quot; Would I ask you for a coffee-coffee with a room of cream-cream?
* Then I hang out with my girlfriend, Gayatri. She's an extremely classy teenager. Hey, girl. Tonight, I was thinking... Aah, hello! Police Inspector Singh, this is your daughter, I do not know her. And to top it off, I live in the best possible Spider-Man city, Mumbattan. Quick tour. This is where the traffic is, this is where the traffic is, this is also where the traffic is, there's traffic here too. And this is where the British stole all of our stuff!

== [[w:Alternative_versions_of_Spider-Man#Spider-Byte_(Earth-22191)|Margo Kess / Spider-Byte]] ==
*''['''Miles:''' I'm Spider-Man.]'' Oh, no way! All of us are.

== Rio Morales ==
*For years, I've been taking care of this little boy. Making sure he's loved, that he feels like he belongs wherever he wants to be. He wants to go out into the world and do great big things. And what I worry about the most, is they won't look out for you like us.
*Wherever you go from here, you have to promise to take care of that little boy for me. Make sure he never forgets where he came from. And never doubts that he's loved. And he never lets anyone tell him that he doesn't belong there. You got to promise me, Miles.

== [[w:Spot (comics)|Dr. Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot]] ==
* I am the Spot.
* [From the Trailer] It’s not funny.
* I'm a scientist. Or I was. I am… Anyway, have you heard of Alchemax? I used to work there. I was considered handsome by scientist standards. I had a little accident. Now look at me! (Give me my foot. Oh, man.)
* I'm so sorry. First of all, I'm not even robbing you. I mean, this ATM machine doesn't even belong to you, right? This belongs to the bank. They're the real criminals.
* Unfortunately for both of us, this is skin.
* I'm gonna take everything from you, like you took everything from me. See you back home, Spider-Man.

== [[w:Vulture (Marvel Comics)|Adriano Toomes / Vulture]] ==
*Ciao, ragazzi. [ Translation: Bye, girl!]
* Che meravigliosa bellezza! [ Translation: what a wonderful beauty!]

== Dialogue ==
:'''Jefferson''': You know what, it's scary. He says these things that are so smart.
:'''Miles (as Spider-Man)''': Cool! Well, I guess I'll probably... ''[starts walking away]''
:'''Jefferson''': And he does these things that are so ''stupid.'' ''[Miles halts, eyes widened]'' I just don't want him to mess it up.
:'''Miles''': ''[backs up, under breath]'' Maybe get off the kid's ass.
:'''Jefferson''': I'm sorry, what?
:'''Miles''': What? Wha- I'm-- I don't know.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''The Spot''': You made me feel empty, like I had a hole inside me.
:'''Miles''': We all have holes.
:'''The Spot''': But now I found out what to fill up that hole with. MORE HOLES!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Metro Spider-Man''': There’s nowhere to run. My bad everybody, there was somewhere to run.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''George''': Parenting... It's a big-ass mystery.

== Voice Cast ==
* [[w:Miles Morales|Miles Morales / Spider-Man]] – {{w|Shameik Moore}}
:: Jeff and Rio's son / Aaron's nephew / Gwen's boyfriend

* {{w|Gwen Stacy}} / [[w:Spider-Woman (Gwen Stacy)|Spider-Gwen]] – [[Hailee Steinfeld]]
:: Shea's daughter / Miles' girlfriend

* [[w:Spider-Man|Peter Parker / Spider-Man]]: May and Ben's nephew and M.J.'s husband
** [[Jake Johnson]] (B. Parker)
** {{w|Daniel Kaluuya}} (Punk)
** {{w|Karan Soni}} (India)
** {{w|Andy Samberg}} (Scarlet)

* [[w:Spider-Man 2099|Miguel O'Hara]] – {{w|Oscar Isaac}}

* [[w:Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew)|Jessica Drew / Spider Woman]] – {{w|Issa Rae}}

* [[w:Jefferson Davis (comics)|Jefferson &quot;Jeff&quot; Davis-Morales]] – {{w|Brian Tyree Henry}}
:: Aaron's brother, Miles' dad, and Rio's husband

* {{w|Rio Morales}} – [[Lauren Vélez|Luna Lauren Velez]]
:: Miles' mom, Jeff's wife, and Aaron's sister-in-law

* [[w:Spot (comics)|Dr. Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot]] – {{w|Jason Schwartzman}}

* {{w|George Stacy}} – {{w|Shea Whigham}}
:: Gwen's dad and a police officer

* [[w:Alternative_versions_of_Spider-Man#Spider-Byte_(Earth-22191)|Margo Kress / Spider-Byte]] – {{w|Amandla Stenberg}}

* Ms. Weber – {{w|Rachel Dratch}}
:: A counselor at Miles' school

* [[w:Mary Jane Watson|Mary Jane &quot;M.J.&quot; Watson]] – Melissa Sturm
:: Peter B's wife / Mayday's mother

* [[w:Vulture (Marvel Comics)|Adriano Toomes / Vulture]] – {{w|Jorma Taccone}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|9362722|Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse}}

{{Spider-Man}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:2023 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2023 American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:African-American superhero films]]
[[Category:African-American animated films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age comedy films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated action films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated films]]
[[Category:Theatrically released animated superhero films]]
[[Category:Sequel films]]
[[Category:Comic book films]]
[[Category:Spider-Man films]]
[[Category:Animated films based on Marvel Comics]]
[[Category:Best Animated Feature Academy Award winners]]
[[Category:Animated films about uncle–nephew relationships]]
[[Category:Animated films about parallel universes]]
[[Category:Animated films about revenge]]
[[Category:Animated films set in Brooklyn]]
[[Category:Animated films set in New York City]]</text>
      <sha1>lxy15n6ruqay1vkaqxtcrmey29qahlg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>An Autobiography (Nehru)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>259277</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964932</id>
      <parentid>3323365</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:05:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964932</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19535" sha1="893f2fag9gft94qisrptqf7dkw2t5wv" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Nehru1920.jpg|thumb|My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.]]
'''''[[w:An Autobiography (Nehru)|An Autobiography]]''''', also known as '''''Toward Freedom''''' (1936), is an [[autobiographical]] book written by [[Jawaharlal Nehru]] while he was in [[prison]] between June 1934 and February 1935, and before he became the first [[w:PM of India|Prime Minister of India]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Sahasrara.svg|thumb|right| Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.]]
:&lt;small&gt;Several editions of Nehru's autobiography were published in his lifetime, including [[w:An Autobiography (1936)|An Autobiography (1936)]], ''Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, with Musings on Recent Events in India'' (1949), and ''Toward Freedom : The Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru'' (1958) Some passages occur in all of these, but with slight variations of wording.&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Sikh pilgrim at the Golden Temple (Harmandir Sahib) in Amritsar, India.jpg|thumb|right|India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads. ]]
[[File:Gandhi Nehru 1929.jpg|thumb|right|A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.]]
[[File:Tea picker in Nilgiris.jpg|thumb|right|To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition. But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification.]]
[[File:Children at market in Bangalore.jpg|thumb|right|Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.]]

*My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.&lt;!---Preface, 1936.---&gt;

*My thoughts travelled more to other countries, and I watched and studied, as far as I could in goal, the world situation in the grip of the great depression. I lead as many books as I could find on the subject, and the more I read the more fascinated I grew. India with her problems and struggles became just a part of this mighty world drama, of the great struggle of political and economic forces that was going on everywhere, nationally and internationally. In that struggle my own sympathies went increasingly towards the [[communist]] side.&lt;!---Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, The Bodley Head, London, 1955, p. 361.---&gt;

*I had long been drawn to socialism and communism, and Russia had appealed to me. Much in Soviet Russia I dislike - the ruthless suppression of all contrary opinion, the wholesale regimentation, the unnecessary violence (as I thought) in carrying out various policies. But there was no lack of violence and suppression in the capitalist world, and I realised more and more bow the very basis and foundation of our acquisitive society and property was violence. Without violence it could not continue for many days. A measure of political liberty meant little indeed when the fear of starvation was always compelling the vast majority of people everywhere to submit to the will of the few, to the greater glory and advantage of the latter.

*Violence was common in both places, but the violence of the capitalist order seemed inherent in it; whilst the violence of Russia, bad though it was, aimed at a new order based on peace and cooperation and real freedom for the masses. With all her blunders, Soviet Russia had triumphed over enormous difficulties and taken great strides towards this new order. While the rest of the world was in the grip of the depression and going backward in some ways, in the Soviet country a great new world was being built up before our eyes. Russia, following the great Lenin, looked into the future and thought only of what was to be, while other countries lay numbed under the dead hand of the past and spent their energy in preserving the useless relics of a bygone age. In particular, I was impressed by the reports of the great progress made by the backward regions of Central Asia under the Soviet regime. In the balance, therefore, I was all in favour of Russia, and the presence and example of the Soviets was a bright and heartening phenomenon in a dark and dismal world.

*But Soviet Russia's success or failure, vastly important as it was as a practical experiment in establishing a communist state, did not affect the soundness of the theory of communism. The Bolsheviks may blunder or even fail because of national or international reasons and yet the communist theory may be correct. On the basis of that very theory it was absurd to copy blindly what had taken place in Russia, for its application depended on the particular conditions prevailing in the country in question and the stage of its historical development. Besides, India, or any other country, could profit by the triumphs as well as the inevitable mistakes of the Bolsheviks. Perhaps the Bolsheviks had tried to go too fast because, surrounded as they were by a world of enemies, they feared external aggression. A slower tempo might avoid much of the misery caused in the rural areas. But then the question arose if really radical results could be obtained by slowing down the rate of change. Reformism was an impossible solution of any vital problem at a critical moment when the basic structure had to be changed, and however slow the progress might be later on, the initial step must be a complete break with the existing order, which had fulfilled its purpose and was now only a drag on future progress.

* Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind. History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it, and it became an unfolding drama with some order and purpose, howsoever unconscious, behind it. In spite of the appalling waste and misery of the past and the present, the future was bright with hope, though many dangers intervened. It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me. It was true that there was plenty of dogma in official communism in Russia and elsewhere, and frequently heresy hunts were organised, That seemed to be deplorable, though it was not difficult to understand in view of the tremendous changes taking place rapidly in the Soviet countries when effective opposition might have resulted in catastrophic failure. The great world crisis and slump seemed to justify the Marxist analysis. While all other systems and theories were groping about in the dark, Marxism alone explained it more or less satisfactorily and offered a real solution.

*As this conviction grew upon me, I was filled with a new excitement and my depression at the non-success of civil disobedience grew much less. Was not the world marching rapidly towards the desired consummation? There were grave dangers of wars and catastrophes, but at any rate we were moving. There was no stagnation. Our national struggle became a stage in the longer journey, and it was as well that repression and suffering were tempering our people for future struggles and forcing them to consider the new ideas that were stirring the world. We would be the stronger and the more disciplined and hardened by the elimination of the weaker elements. Time was in our favour.

*As between fascism and communism my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the humanist liberal tradition to get out of it completely. This bourgeois background follows me about and is naturally a source of irritation to many communists. I dislike dogmatism, and the treatment of Karl Marx's writings or any other book as revealed scripture which cannot be challenged, and the regimentation and heresy hunts which seem to be a feature of modern communism. I dislike also much that has happened in Russia, and especially the excessive use of violence in normal times. But still I incline more and more towards a communist philosophy.

* '''Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.''' Yet, mysticism (in the narrow sense of the word) irritates me; it appears to be vague and soft and flabby, not a rigorous discipline of the mind but a surrender of mental faculties and living in a sea of emotional experience. The experience may lead occasionally to some insight into inner and less obvious processes, but it is also likely to lead to self-delusion. &lt;!-- p. 14 (1946) --&gt;

* For the first time I began to think, consciously and deliberately of religion and other worlds. The '''[[Hinduism|Hindu]] religion especially went up in my estimation;''' not the ritual or ceremonial part, but it's great books, the &quot;Upnishads&quot;, and the &quot;[[Bhagavad Gita]]&quot;.
** Jawaharlal Nehru, an autobiography, p. 15

* '''Essentially I am interested in this world, in this life, not in some other world or future life.''' Whether there is such a thing as soul, or whether there is survival after death or not, I do not know; and important as these questions are, they do not trouble me the least. &lt;!-- p. 15 (1946) --&gt;

*Marx may be wrong in some of his statements, or his theory of value; this I am not competent to judge. But he seems to me to have possessed quite an extraordinary degree of insight into social phenomena, and this insight was apparently due to the scientific method he adopted. This method, applied to past history as well as current events, helps us in understanding them far more than any other method of apporach, and it is because of this that the most revealing and keen analysis of the changes that are taking place in the world today come from Marxist writers. It is easy to point out that Marx ignored or underrated certain subsequent tendencies, like the rise of a revolutionary element in the middle class, which is so notable today. But the whole value of Marxism seems to me to lie in its absence of dogmatism, in its stress on a certain outlook and mode of approach, and in its attitude to action. That outlook helps us in understanding the social phenomena of our own times, and points out the way of action and escape.

*It is difficult to be patient with many communists; they have developed a peculiar method of irritating others. But they are a sorely tried people, and, outside the Soviet Union, they have to contend against enormous difficulties. I have always admitted their great courage and capacity for sacrifice. They suffer greatly, as unhappily untold millions suffer in various ways, but not blindly before a malign and all-powerful fate. They suffer as human beings, and there is a tragic nobility about such suffering.

* '''What the mysterious is I do not know. I do not call it God because God has come to mean much that I do not believe in.''' I find myself incapable of thinking of a deity or of any unknown supreme power in anthropomorphic terms, and the fact that many people think so is continually a source of surprise to me. Any idea of a personal God seems very odd to me. &lt;br&gt; Intellectually, I can appreciate to some extent the conception of [[w:Monism|monism]], and I have been attracted towards the [[w:Advaita Vedanta|Advaita]] (non-dualist) philosophy of the [[w:Vedanta|Vedanta]], though I do not presume to understand it in all its depth and intricacy, and I realise that merely an intellectual appreciation of such matters does not carry one far. &lt;!-- p. 16 (1946) --&gt;
* '''Many a Congressman was a communalist under his national cloak.''' But the Congress leadership stood firm and, on the whole, refused to side with either communal party, or rather with any communal group. '''Long ago, right at the commencement of non-co-operation or even earlier, Gandhiji had laid down his formula for solving the communal problem. According to him, it could only be solved by goodwill and the generosity of the majority group, and so he was prepared to agree to everything that the Muslims might demand. He wanted to win them over, not to bargain with them.''' With foresight and a true sense of values he grasped at the reality that was worthwhile; but others who thought they knew the market price of everything, and were ignorant of the true value of anything, stuck to the methods of the market-place. They saw the cost of purchase with painful clearness, but they had no appreciation of the worth of the article they might have bought. &lt;!-- p. 136 --&gt;
* '''I turned inevitably with goodwill towards communism, for, whatever its faults, it was at least not hypocritical and not imperialistic.''' It was not a doctrinal adherence, as I did not know much about the fine points of [[Communism]], my acquaintance being limited at the time to its broad features. There attracted me, as also the tremendous changes taking place in Russia. But Communists often irritated me by their dictatorial ways, their aggressive and rather vulgar methods, their habit of denouncing everybody who did not agree with them. This reaction was no doubt due, as they would say, to my own ''bourgeois'' education and up-bringing. &lt;!-- p. 163  --&gt; 
* '''Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind.''' History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it... '''It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me.&lt;!-- p. 362-363  --&gt;'''

* '''India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads.''' The spectacle of what is called religion, or at any rate organised religion, in India and elsewhere has filled me with horror, and I have frequently condemned it and wished to make a clean sweep of it. Almost always it seems to stand for blind belief and reaction, dogma and bigotry, superstition and exploitation, and the preservation of vested interests. And yet I knew well that there was something else in it, something which supplied a deep inner craving of human beings. How else could it have been the tremendous power it has been and brought peace and comfort to innumerable tortured souls? Was that peace merely the shelter of blind belief and absence of questioning, the calm that comes from being safe in harbour, protected from the storms of the open sea, or was it something more? '''In some cases certainly it was something more.''' &lt;br&gt; But organized religion, whatever its past may have been, today is largely an empty form devoid of real content. Mr. [[G. K. Chesterton]] has compared it (not his own particular brand of religion, but other!) to a fossil which is the form of an animal or organism from which all its own organic substance has entirely disappeared, but has kept its shape, because it has been filled up by some totally different substance. And, even where something of value still remains, it is enveloped by other and harmful contents. That seems to have happened in our Eastern religions as well as in the Western.&lt;!-- p. 241 --&gt;

*Because of this wide and comprehensive outlook, the real understanding communist develops to some extent an organic sense of social life. Politics for him cease to be a mere record of opportunism or a groping in the dark. The ideals and objectives he works forgive a meaning to the struggle and to the sacrifices be willingly faces. He feels that he is part of a grand army marching forward to realise human fate and destiny, and he has the sense of 'marching step by step with history'. Probably most communists are far from feeling all this. Perhaps only Lenin had this organic sense of life in its fullness which made his action so effective. But to a small extent every communist, who has understood the philosophy of his movement, has it.

* '''I knew that Gandhiji usually acts on instinct (I prefer to call it that than the &quot;inner voice&quot; or an answer to prayer) and very often that instinct is right.''' He has repeatedly shown what a wonderful knack he has of sensing the mass mind and of acting at the psychological moment. The reasons which he afterward adduces to justify his action are usually afterthoughts and seldom carry one very far. '''A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.'''
** On [[Mahatma Gandhi]]&lt;!-- p. 506 (1949) / p. 310 (1961) --&gt;

* Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Life is not all logic, and those ends will have to be varied from time to time to fit in with it, but some end must always be clearly envisaged. &lt;!-- p. 314 --&gt;

* '''To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition.''' But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification. Nor do I appreciate in the least the idealization of the &quot;simple peasant life.&quot; I have almost a horror of it, and instead of submitting to it myself I want to drag out even the peasantry from it, not to [[urbanization]], but to the spread of urban cultural facilities to rural areas. &lt;!-- p. 315 --&gt;

* In this matter, as in many others, my sympathies were with the Left.

* '''Organised religion allying itself to theology and often more concerned with its vested interests than with the things of the spirit encourages a temper which is the very opposite of science.''' It produces narrowness and intolerance, credulity and superstition, emotionalism and irrationalism. It tends to close and limit the mind of man and to produce a temper of a dependent, unfree person. &lt;br&gt; Even if God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him, so [[Voltaire]], said ... perhaps that is true, and indeed the mind of man has always been trying to fashion some such [[mental image]] or conception which grew with the mind's growth. '''But there is something also in the reverse proposition: even if God exist, it may be desirable not to look up to Him or to rely upon Him. Too much dependence on supernatural forces may lead, and has often led, to loss of self-reliance in man, and to a blunting of his capacity and creative ability.''' And yet some faith seems necessary in things of the spirit which are beyond the scope of our physical world, some reliance on moral, spiritual, and idealistic conceptions, or else we have no anchorage, no objectives or purpose in life. '''Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.''' &lt;!-- p. 524 (1946) --&gt;

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Autobiographies|τ]]</text>
      <sha1>893f2fag9gft94qisrptqf7dkw2t5wv</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964935</id>
      <parentid>3964932</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:06:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964935</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19553" sha1="2joyrmzk9pdzu7h70cq7fitf7eqr3aq" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Nehru1920.jpg|thumb|My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.]]
'''''[[w:An Autobiography (Nehru)|An Autobiography]]''''', also known as '''''Toward Freedom''''' (1936), is an [[autobiographical]] book written by [[Jawaharlal Nehru]] while he was in [[prison]] between June 1934 and February 1935, and before he became the first [[w:PM of India|Prime Minister of India]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Sahasrara.svg|thumb|right| Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.]]
:&lt;small&gt;Several editions of Nehru's autobiography were published in his lifetime, including [[w:An Autobiography (1936)|An Autobiography (1936)]], ''Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, with Musings on Recent Events in India'' (1949), and ''Toward Freedom : The Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru'' (1958) Some passages occur in all of these, but with slight variations of wording.&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Sikh pilgrim at the Golden Temple (Harmandir Sahib) in Amritsar, India.jpg|thumb|right|India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and [[Hindu]] and [[Muslim]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads. ]]
[[File:Gandhi Nehru 1929.jpg|thumb|right|A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.]]
[[File:Tea picker in Nilgiris.jpg|thumb|right|To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition. But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification.]]
[[File:Children at market in Bangalore.jpg|thumb|right|Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.]]

*My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.&lt;!---Preface, 1936.---&gt;

*My thoughts travelled more to other countries, and I watched and studied, as far as I could in goal, the world situation in the grip of the great depression. I lead as many books as I could find on the subject, and the more I read the more fascinated I grew. India with her problems and struggles became just a part of this mighty world drama, of the great struggle of political and economic forces that was going on everywhere, nationally and internationally. In that struggle my own sympathies went increasingly towards the [[communist]] side.&lt;!---Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, The Bodley Head, London, 1955, p. 361.---&gt;

*I had long been drawn to socialism and communism, and Russia had appealed to me. Much in Soviet Russia I dislike - the ruthless suppression of all contrary opinion, the wholesale regimentation, the unnecessary violence (as I thought) in carrying out various policies. But there was no lack of violence and suppression in the capitalist world, and I realised more and more bow the very basis and foundation of our acquisitive society and property was violence. Without violence it could not continue for many days. A measure of political liberty meant little indeed when the fear of starvation was always compelling the vast majority of people everywhere to submit to the will of the few, to the greater glory and advantage of the latter.

*Violence was common in both places, but the violence of the capitalist order seemed inherent in it; whilst the violence of Russia, bad though it was, aimed at a new order based on peace and cooperation and real freedom for the masses. With all her blunders, Soviet Russia had triumphed over enormous difficulties and taken great strides towards this new order. While the rest of the world was in the grip of the depression and going backward in some ways, in the Soviet country a great new world was being built up before our eyes. Russia, following the great Lenin, looked into the future and thought only of what was to be, while other countries lay numbed under the dead hand of the past and spent their energy in preserving the useless relics of a bygone age. In particular, I was impressed by the reports of the great progress made by the backward regions of Central Asia under the Soviet regime. In the balance, therefore, I was all in favour of Russia, and the presence and example of the Soviets was a bright and heartening phenomenon in a dark and dismal world.

*But Soviet Russia's success or failure, vastly important as it was as a practical experiment in establishing a communist state, did not affect the soundness of the theory of communism. The Bolsheviks may blunder or even fail because of national or international reasons and yet the communist theory may be correct. On the basis of that very theory it was absurd to copy blindly what had taken place in Russia, for its application depended on the particular conditions prevailing in the country in question and the stage of its historical development. Besides, India, or any other country, could profit by the triumphs as well as the inevitable mistakes of the Bolsheviks. Perhaps the Bolsheviks had tried to go too fast because, surrounded as they were by a world of enemies, they feared external aggression. A slower tempo might avoid much of the misery caused in the rural areas. But then the question arose if really radical results could be obtained by slowing down the rate of change. Reformism was an impossible solution of any vital problem at a critical moment when the basic structure had to be changed, and however slow the progress might be later on, the initial step must be a complete break with the existing order, which had fulfilled its purpose and was now only a drag on future progress.

* Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind. History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it, and it became an unfolding drama with some order and purpose, howsoever unconscious, behind it. In spite of the appalling waste and misery of the past and the present, the future was bright with hope, though many dangers intervened. It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me. It was true that there was plenty of dogma in official communism in Russia and elsewhere, and frequently heresy hunts were organised, That seemed to be deplorable, though it was not difficult to understand in view of the tremendous changes taking place rapidly in the Soviet countries when effective opposition might have resulted in catastrophic failure. The great world crisis and slump seemed to justify the Marxist analysis. While all other systems and theories were groping about in the dark, Marxism alone explained it more or less satisfactorily and offered a real solution.

*As this conviction grew upon me, I was filled with a new excitement and my depression at the non-success of civil disobedience grew much less. Was not the world marching rapidly towards the desired consummation? There were grave dangers of wars and catastrophes, but at any rate we were moving. There was no stagnation. Our national struggle became a stage in the longer journey, and it was as well that repression and suffering were tempering our people for future struggles and forcing them to consider the new ideas that were stirring the world. We would be the stronger and the more disciplined and hardened by the elimination of the weaker elements. Time was in our favour.

*As between fascism and communism my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the humanist liberal tradition to get out of it completely. This bourgeois background follows me about and is naturally a source of irritation to many communists. I dislike dogmatism, and the treatment of Karl Marx's writings or any other book as revealed scripture which cannot be challenged, and the regimentation and heresy hunts which seem to be a feature of modern communism. I dislike also much that has happened in Russia, and especially the excessive use of violence in normal times. But still I incline more and more towards a communist philosophy.

* '''Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.''' Yet, mysticism (in the narrow sense of the word) irritates me; it appears to be vague and soft and flabby, not a rigorous discipline of the mind but a surrender of mental faculties and living in a sea of emotional experience. The experience may lead occasionally to some insight into inner and less obvious processes, but it is also likely to lead to self-delusion. &lt;!-- p. 14 (1946) --&gt;

* For the first time I began to think, consciously and deliberately of religion and other worlds. The '''[[Hinduism|Hindu]] religion especially went up in my estimation;''' not the ritual or ceremonial part, but it's great books, the &quot;Upnishads&quot;, and the &quot;[[Bhagavad Gita]]&quot;.
** Jawaharlal Nehru, an autobiography, p. 15

* '''Essentially I am interested in this world, in this life, not in some other world or future life.''' Whether there is such a thing as soul, or whether there is survival after death or not, I do not know; and important as these questions are, they do not trouble me the least. &lt;!-- p. 15 (1946) --&gt;

*Marx may be wrong in some of his statements, or his theory of value; this I am not competent to judge. But he seems to me to have possessed quite an extraordinary degree of insight into social phenomena, and this insight was apparently due to the scientific method he adopted. This method, applied to past history as well as current events, helps us in understanding them far more than any other method of apporach, and it is because of this that the most revealing and keen analysis of the changes that are taking place in the world today come from Marxist writers. It is easy to point out that Marx ignored or underrated certain subsequent tendencies, like the rise of a revolutionary element in the middle class, which is so notable today. But the whole value of Marxism seems to me to lie in its absence of dogmatism, in its stress on a certain outlook and mode of approach, and in its attitude to action. That outlook helps us in understanding the social phenomena of our own times, and points out the way of action and escape.

*It is difficult to be patient with many communists; they have developed a peculiar method of irritating others. But they are a sorely tried people, and, outside the Soviet Union, they have to contend against enormous difficulties. I have always admitted their great courage and capacity for sacrifice. They suffer greatly, as unhappily untold millions suffer in various ways, but not blindly before a malign and all-powerful fate. They suffer as human beings, and there is a tragic nobility about such suffering.

* '''What the mysterious is I do not know. I do not call it God because God has come to mean much that I do not believe in.''' I find myself incapable of thinking of a deity or of any unknown supreme power in anthropomorphic terms, and the fact that many people think so is continually a source of surprise to me. Any idea of a personal God seems very odd to me. &lt;br&gt; Intellectually, I can appreciate to some extent the conception of [[w:Monism|monism]], and I have been attracted towards the [[w:Advaita Vedanta|Advaita]] (non-dualist) philosophy of the [[w:Vedanta|Vedanta]], though I do not presume to understand it in all its depth and intricacy, and I realise that merely an intellectual appreciation of such matters does not carry one far. &lt;!-- p. 16 (1946) --&gt;
* '''Many a Congressman was a communalist under his national cloak.''' But the Congress leadership stood firm and, on the whole, refused to side with either communal party, or rather with any communal group. '''Long ago, right at the commencement of non-co-operation or even earlier, Gandhiji had laid down his formula for solving the communal problem. According to him, it could only be solved by goodwill and the generosity of the majority group, and so he was prepared to agree to everything that the Muslims might demand. He wanted to win them over, not to bargain with them.''' With foresight and a true sense of values he grasped at the reality that was worthwhile; but others who thought they knew the market price of everything, and were ignorant of the true value of anything, stuck to the methods of the market-place. They saw the cost of purchase with painful clearness, but they had no appreciation of the worth of the article they might have bought. &lt;!-- p. 136 --&gt;
* '''I turned inevitably with goodwill towards communism, for, whatever its faults, it was at least not hypocritical and not imperialistic.''' It was not a doctrinal adherence, as I did not know much about the fine points of [[Communism]], my acquaintance being limited at the time to its broad features. There attracted me, as also the tremendous changes taking place in Russia. But Communists often irritated me by their dictatorial ways, their aggressive and rather vulgar methods, their habit of denouncing everybody who did not agree with them. This reaction was no doubt due, as they would say, to my own ''bourgeois'' education and up-bringing. &lt;!-- p. 163  --&gt; 
* '''Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind.''' History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it... '''It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me.&lt;!-- p. 362-363  --&gt;'''

* '''India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads.''' The spectacle of what is called religion, or at any rate organised religion, in India and elsewhere has filled me with horror, and I have frequently condemned it and wished to make a clean sweep of it. Almost always it seems to stand for blind belief and reaction, dogma and bigotry, superstition and exploitation, and the preservation of vested interests. And yet I knew well that there was something else in it, something which supplied a deep inner craving of human beings. How else could it have been the tremendous power it has been and brought peace and comfort to innumerable tortured souls? Was that peace merely the shelter of blind belief and absence of questioning, the calm that comes from being safe in harbour, protected from the storms of the open sea, or was it something more? '''In some cases certainly it was something more.''' &lt;br&gt; But organized religion, whatever its past may have been, today is largely an empty form devoid of real content. Mr. [[G. K. Chesterton]] has compared it (not his own particular brand of religion, but other!) to a fossil which is the form of an animal or organism from which all its own organic substance has entirely disappeared, but has kept its shape, because it has been filled up by some totally different substance. And, even where something of value still remains, it is enveloped by other and harmful contents. That seems to have happened in our Eastern religions as well as in the Western.&lt;!-- p. 241 --&gt;

*Because of this wide and comprehensive outlook, the real understanding communist develops to some extent an organic sense of social life. Politics for him cease to be a mere record of opportunism or a groping in the dark. The ideals and objectives he works forgive a meaning to the struggle and to the sacrifices be willingly faces. He feels that he is part of a grand army marching forward to realise human fate and destiny, and he has the sense of 'marching step by step with history'. Probably most communists are far from feeling all this. Perhaps only Lenin had this organic sense of life in its fullness which made his action so effective. But to a small extent every communist, who has understood the philosophy of his movement, has it.

* '''I knew that Gandhiji usually acts on instinct (I prefer to call it that than the &quot;inner voice&quot; or an answer to prayer) and very often that instinct is right.''' He has repeatedly shown what a wonderful knack he has of sensing the mass mind and of acting at the psychological moment. The reasons which he afterward adduces to justify his action are usually afterthoughts and seldom carry one very far. '''A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.'''
** On [[Mahatma Gandhi]]&lt;!-- p. 506 (1949) / p. 310 (1961) --&gt;

* Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Life is not all logic, and those ends will have to be varied from time to time to fit in with it, but some end must always be clearly envisaged. &lt;!-- p. 314 --&gt;

* '''To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition.''' But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification. Nor do I appreciate in the least the idealization of the &quot;simple peasant life.&quot; I have almost a horror of it, and instead of submitting to it myself I want to drag out even the peasantry from it, not to [[urbanization]], but to the spread of urban cultural facilities to rural areas. &lt;!-- p. 315 --&gt;

* In this matter, as in many others, my sympathies were with the Left.

* '''Organised religion allying itself to theology and often more concerned with its vested interests than with the things of the spirit encourages a temper which is the very opposite of science.''' It produces narrowness and intolerance, credulity and superstition, emotionalism and irrationalism. It tends to close and limit the mind of man and to produce a temper of a dependent, unfree person. &lt;br&gt; Even if God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him, so [[Voltaire]], said ... perhaps that is true, and indeed the mind of man has always been trying to fashion some such [[mental image]] or conception which grew with the mind's growth. '''But there is something also in the reverse proposition: even if God exist, it may be desirable not to look up to Him or to rely upon Him. Too much dependence on supernatural forces may lead, and has often led, to loss of self-reliance in man, and to a blunting of his capacity and creative ability.''' And yet some faith seems necessary in things of the spirit which are beyond the scope of our physical world, some reliance on moral, spiritual, and idealistic conceptions, or else we have no anchorage, no objectives or purpose in life. '''Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.''' &lt;!-- p. 524 (1946) --&gt;

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Autobiographies|τ]]</text>
      <sha1>2joyrmzk9pdzu7h70cq7fitf7eqr3aq</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964942</id>
      <parentid>3964935</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:08:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964942</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19569" sha1="7181p4fsjb31qzvat8mdgvltsdv65ie" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Nehru1920.jpg|thumb|My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.]]
'''''[[w:An Autobiography (Nehru)|An Autobiography]]''''', also known as '''''Toward Freedom''''' (1936), is an [[autobiographical]] book written by [[Jawaharlal Nehru]] while he was in [[prison]] between June 1934 and February 1935, and before he became the first [[w:PM of India|Prime Minister of India]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Sahasrara.svg|thumb|right| [[Religion]] merges into [[mysticism]] and [[metaphysics]] and [[philosophy]]. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.]]
:&lt;small&gt;Several editions of Nehru's autobiography were published in his lifetime, including [[w:An Autobiography (1936)|An Autobiography (1936)]], ''Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, with Musings on Recent Events in India'' (1949), and ''Toward Freedom : The Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru'' (1958) Some passages occur in all of these, but with slight variations of wording.&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Sikh pilgrim at the Golden Temple (Harmandir Sahib) in Amritsar, India.jpg|thumb|right|India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and [[Hindu]] and [[Muslim]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads. ]]
[[File:Gandhi Nehru 1929.jpg|thumb|right|A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.]]
[[File:Tea picker in Nilgiris.jpg|thumb|right|To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition. But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification.]]
[[File:Children at market in Bangalore.jpg|thumb|right|Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.]]

*My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.&lt;!---Preface, 1936.---&gt;

*My thoughts travelled more to other countries, and I watched and studied, as far as I could in goal, the world situation in the grip of the great depression. I lead as many books as I could find on the subject, and the more I read the more fascinated I grew. India with her problems and struggles became just a part of this mighty world drama, of the great struggle of political and economic forces that was going on everywhere, nationally and internationally. In that struggle my own sympathies went increasingly towards the [[communist]] side.&lt;!---Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, The Bodley Head, London, 1955, p. 361.---&gt;

*I had long been drawn to socialism and communism, and Russia had appealed to me. Much in Soviet Russia I dislike - the ruthless suppression of all contrary opinion, the wholesale regimentation, the unnecessary violence (as I thought) in carrying out various policies. But there was no lack of violence and suppression in the capitalist world, and I realised more and more bow the very basis and foundation of our acquisitive society and property was violence. Without violence it could not continue for many days. A measure of political liberty meant little indeed when the fear of starvation was always compelling the vast majority of people everywhere to submit to the will of the few, to the greater glory and advantage of the latter.

*Violence was common in both places, but the violence of the capitalist order seemed inherent in it; whilst the violence of Russia, bad though it was, aimed at a new order based on peace and cooperation and real freedom for the masses. With all her blunders, Soviet Russia had triumphed over enormous difficulties and taken great strides towards this new order. While the rest of the world was in the grip of the depression and going backward in some ways, in the Soviet country a great new world was being built up before our eyes. Russia, following the great Lenin, looked into the future and thought only of what was to be, while other countries lay numbed under the dead hand of the past and spent their energy in preserving the useless relics of a bygone age. In particular, I was impressed by the reports of the great progress made by the backward regions of Central Asia under the Soviet regime. In the balance, therefore, I was all in favour of Russia, and the presence and example of the Soviets was a bright and heartening phenomenon in a dark and dismal world.

*But Soviet Russia's success or failure, vastly important as it was as a practical experiment in establishing a communist state, did not affect the soundness of the theory of communism. The Bolsheviks may blunder or even fail because of national or international reasons and yet the communist theory may be correct. On the basis of that very theory it was absurd to copy blindly what had taken place in Russia, for its application depended on the particular conditions prevailing in the country in question and the stage of its historical development. Besides, India, or any other country, could profit by the triumphs as well as the inevitable mistakes of the Bolsheviks. Perhaps the Bolsheviks had tried to go too fast because, surrounded as they were by a world of enemies, they feared external aggression. A slower tempo might avoid much of the misery caused in the rural areas. But then the question arose if really radical results could be obtained by slowing down the rate of change. Reformism was an impossible solution of any vital problem at a critical moment when the basic structure had to be changed, and however slow the progress might be later on, the initial step must be a complete break with the existing order, which had fulfilled its purpose and was now only a drag on future progress.

* Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind. History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it, and it became an unfolding drama with some order and purpose, howsoever unconscious, behind it. In spite of the appalling waste and misery of the past and the present, the future was bright with hope, though many dangers intervened. It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me. It was true that there was plenty of dogma in official communism in Russia and elsewhere, and frequently heresy hunts were organised, That seemed to be deplorable, though it was not difficult to understand in view of the tremendous changes taking place rapidly in the Soviet countries when effective opposition might have resulted in catastrophic failure. The great world crisis and slump seemed to justify the Marxist analysis. While all other systems and theories were groping about in the dark, Marxism alone explained it more or less satisfactorily and offered a real solution.

*As this conviction grew upon me, I was filled with a new excitement and my depression at the non-success of civil disobedience grew much less. Was not the world marching rapidly towards the desired consummation? There were grave dangers of wars and catastrophes, but at any rate we were moving. There was no stagnation. Our national struggle became a stage in the longer journey, and it was as well that repression and suffering were tempering our people for future struggles and forcing them to consider the new ideas that were stirring the world. We would be the stronger and the more disciplined and hardened by the elimination of the weaker elements. Time was in our favour.

*As between fascism and communism my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the humanist liberal tradition to get out of it completely. This bourgeois background follows me about and is naturally a source of irritation to many communists. I dislike dogmatism, and the treatment of Karl Marx's writings or any other book as revealed scripture which cannot be challenged, and the regimentation and heresy hunts which seem to be a feature of modern communism. I dislike also much that has happened in Russia, and especially the excessive use of violence in normal times. But still I incline more and more towards a communist philosophy.

* '''Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.''' Yet, mysticism (in the narrow sense of the word) irritates me; it appears to be vague and soft and flabby, not a rigorous discipline of the mind but a surrender of mental faculties and living in a sea of emotional experience. The experience may lead occasionally to some insight into inner and less obvious processes, but it is also likely to lead to self-delusion. &lt;!-- p. 14 (1946) --&gt;

* For the first time I began to think, consciously and deliberately of religion and other worlds. The '''[[Hinduism|Hindu]] religion especially went up in my estimation;''' not the ritual or ceremonial part, but it's great books, the &quot;Upnishads&quot;, and the &quot;[[Bhagavad Gita]]&quot;.
** Jawaharlal Nehru, an autobiography, p. 15

* '''Essentially I am interested in this world, in this life, not in some other world or future life.''' Whether there is such a thing as soul, or whether there is survival after death or not, I do not know; and important as these questions are, they do not trouble me the least. &lt;!-- p. 15 (1946) --&gt;

*Marx may be wrong in some of his statements, or his theory of value; this I am not competent to judge. But he seems to me to have possessed quite an extraordinary degree of insight into social phenomena, and this insight was apparently due to the scientific method he adopted. This method, applied to past history as well as current events, helps us in understanding them far more than any other method of apporach, and it is because of this that the most revealing and keen analysis of the changes that are taking place in the world today come from Marxist writers. It is easy to point out that Marx ignored or underrated certain subsequent tendencies, like the rise of a revolutionary element in the middle class, which is so notable today. But the whole value of Marxism seems to me to lie in its absence of dogmatism, in its stress on a certain outlook and mode of approach, and in its attitude to action. That outlook helps us in understanding the social phenomena of our own times, and points out the way of action and escape.

*It is difficult to be patient with many communists; they have developed a peculiar method of irritating others. But they are a sorely tried people, and, outside the Soviet Union, they have to contend against enormous difficulties. I have always admitted their great courage and capacity for sacrifice. They suffer greatly, as unhappily untold millions suffer in various ways, but not blindly before a malign and all-powerful fate. They suffer as human beings, and there is a tragic nobility about such suffering.

* '''What the mysterious is I do not know. I do not call it God because God has come to mean much that I do not believe in.''' I find myself incapable of thinking of a deity or of any unknown supreme power in anthropomorphic terms, and the fact that many people think so is continually a source of surprise to me. Any idea of a personal God seems very odd to me. &lt;br&gt; Intellectually, I can appreciate to some extent the conception of [[w:Monism|monism]], and I have been attracted towards the [[w:Advaita Vedanta|Advaita]] (non-dualist) philosophy of the [[w:Vedanta|Vedanta]], though I do not presume to understand it in all its depth and intricacy, and I realise that merely an intellectual appreciation of such matters does not carry one far. &lt;!-- p. 16 (1946) --&gt;
* '''Many a Congressman was a communalist under his national cloak.''' But the Congress leadership stood firm and, on the whole, refused to side with either communal party, or rather with any communal group. '''Long ago, right at the commencement of non-co-operation or even earlier, Gandhiji had laid down his formula for solving the communal problem. According to him, it could only be solved by goodwill and the generosity of the majority group, and so he was prepared to agree to everything that the Muslims might demand. He wanted to win them over, not to bargain with them.''' With foresight and a true sense of values he grasped at the reality that was worthwhile; but others who thought they knew the market price of everything, and were ignorant of the true value of anything, stuck to the methods of the market-place. They saw the cost of purchase with painful clearness, but they had no appreciation of the worth of the article they might have bought. &lt;!-- p. 136 --&gt;
* '''I turned inevitably with goodwill towards communism, for, whatever its faults, it was at least not hypocritical and not imperialistic.''' It was not a doctrinal adherence, as I did not know much about the fine points of [[Communism]], my acquaintance being limited at the time to its broad features. There attracted me, as also the tremendous changes taking place in Russia. But Communists often irritated me by their dictatorial ways, their aggressive and rather vulgar methods, their habit of denouncing everybody who did not agree with them. This reaction was no doubt due, as they would say, to my own ''bourgeois'' education and up-bringing. &lt;!-- p. 163  --&gt; 
* '''Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind.''' History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it... '''It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me.&lt;!-- p. 362-363  --&gt;'''

* '''India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads.''' The spectacle of what is called religion, or at any rate organised religion, in India and elsewhere has filled me with horror, and I have frequently condemned it and wished to make a clean sweep of it. Almost always it seems to stand for blind belief and reaction, dogma and bigotry, superstition and exploitation, and the preservation of vested interests. And yet I knew well that there was something else in it, something which supplied a deep inner craving of human beings. How else could it have been the tremendous power it has been and brought peace and comfort to innumerable tortured souls? Was that peace merely the shelter of blind belief and absence of questioning, the calm that comes from being safe in harbour, protected from the storms of the open sea, or was it something more? '''In some cases certainly it was something more.''' &lt;br&gt; But organized religion, whatever its past may have been, today is largely an empty form devoid of real content. Mr. [[G. K. Chesterton]] has compared it (not his own particular brand of religion, but other!) to a fossil which is the form of an animal or organism from which all its own organic substance has entirely disappeared, but has kept its shape, because it has been filled up by some totally different substance. And, even where something of value still remains, it is enveloped by other and harmful contents. That seems to have happened in our Eastern religions as well as in the Western.&lt;!-- p. 241 --&gt;

*Because of this wide and comprehensive outlook, the real understanding communist develops to some extent an organic sense of social life. Politics for him cease to be a mere record of opportunism or a groping in the dark. The ideals and objectives he works forgive a meaning to the struggle and to the sacrifices be willingly faces. He feels that he is part of a grand army marching forward to realise human fate and destiny, and he has the sense of 'marching step by step with history'. Probably most communists are far from feeling all this. Perhaps only Lenin had this organic sense of life in its fullness which made his action so effective. But to a small extent every communist, who has understood the philosophy of his movement, has it.

* '''I knew that Gandhiji usually acts on instinct (I prefer to call it that than the &quot;inner voice&quot; or an answer to prayer) and very often that instinct is right.''' He has repeatedly shown what a wonderful knack he has of sensing the mass mind and of acting at the psychological moment. The reasons which he afterward adduces to justify his action are usually afterthoughts and seldom carry one very far. '''A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.'''
** On [[Mahatma Gandhi]]&lt;!-- p. 506 (1949) / p. 310 (1961) --&gt;

* Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Life is not all logic, and those ends will have to be varied from time to time to fit in with it, but some end must always be clearly envisaged. &lt;!-- p. 314 --&gt;

* '''To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition.''' But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification. Nor do I appreciate in the least the idealization of the &quot;simple peasant life.&quot; I have almost a horror of it, and instead of submitting to it myself I want to drag out even the peasantry from it, not to [[urbanization]], but to the spread of urban cultural facilities to rural areas. &lt;!-- p. 315 --&gt;

* In this matter, as in many others, my sympathies were with the Left.

* '''Organised religion allying itself to theology and often more concerned with its vested interests than with the things of the spirit encourages a temper which is the very opposite of science.''' It produces narrowness and intolerance, credulity and superstition, emotionalism and irrationalism. It tends to close and limit the mind of man and to produce a temper of a dependent, unfree person. &lt;br&gt; Even if God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him, so [[Voltaire]], said ... perhaps that is true, and indeed the mind of man has always been trying to fashion some such [[mental image]] or conception which grew with the mind's growth. '''But there is something also in the reverse proposition: even if God exist, it may be desirable not to look up to Him or to rely upon Him. Too much dependence on supernatural forces may lead, and has often led, to loss of self-reliance in man, and to a blunting of his capacity and creative ability.''' And yet some faith seems necessary in things of the spirit which are beyond the scope of our physical world, some reliance on moral, spiritual, and idealistic conceptions, or else we have no anchorage, no objectives or purpose in life. '''Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.''' &lt;!-- p. 524 (1946) --&gt;

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Autobiographies|τ]]</text>
      <sha1>7181p4fsjb31qzvat8mdgvltsdv65ie</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964955</id>
      <parentid>3964942</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:20:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964955</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19614" sha1="4ft17z48d4j8cf4q3x3umrclvjkx48w" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Nehru1920.jpg|thumb|My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.]]
'''''[[w:An Autobiography (Nehru)|An Autobiography]]''''', also known as '''''Toward Freedom''''' (1936), is an [[autobiographical]] book written by [[Jawaharlal Nehru]] while he was in [[prison]] between June 1934 and February 1935, and before he became the first [[w:PM of India|Prime Minister of India]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Sahasrara.svg|thumb|right| [[Religion]] merges into [[mysticism]] and [[metaphysics]] and [[philosophy]]. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.]]
:&lt;small&gt;Several editions of Nehru's autobiography were published in his lifetime, including [[w:An Autobiography (1936)|An Autobiography (1936)]], ''Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, with Musings on Recent Events in India'' (1949), and ''Toward Freedom : The Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru'' (1958) Some passages occur in all of these, but with slight variations of wording.&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Sikh pilgrim at the Golden Temple (Harmandir Sahib) in Amritsar, India.jpg|thumb|right|India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and [[Hindu]] and [[Muslim]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads. ]]
[[File:Gandhi Nehru 1929.jpg|thumb|right|A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.]]
[[File:Tea picker in Nilgiris.jpg|thumb|right|To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition. But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification.]]
[[File:Children at market in Bangalore.jpg|thumb|right|Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.]]

*My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.&lt;!---Preface, 1936.---&gt;

*My thoughts travelled more to other countries, and I watched and studied, as far as I could in goal, the world situation in the grip of the great depression. I lead as many books as I could find on the subject, and the more I read the more fascinated I grew. India with her problems and struggles became just a part of this mighty world drama, of the great struggle of political and economic forces that was going on everywhere, nationally and internationally. In that struggle my own sympathies went increasingly towards the [[communist]] side.&lt;!---Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, The Bodley Head, London, 1955, p. 361.---&gt;

*I had long been drawn to socialism and communism, and Russia had appealed to me. Much in Soviet Russia I dislike - the ruthless suppression of all contrary opinion, the wholesale regimentation, the unnecessary violence (as I thought) in carrying out various policies. But there was no lack of violence and suppression in the capitalist world, and I realised more and more bow the very basis and foundation of our acquisitive society and property was violence. Without violence it could not continue for many days. A measure of political liberty meant little indeed when the fear of starvation was always compelling the vast majority of people everywhere to submit to the will of the few, to the greater glory and advantage of the latter.

*Violence was common in both places, but the violence of the capitalist order seemed inherent in it; whilst the violence of Russia, bad though it was, aimed at a new order based on peace and cooperation and real freedom for the masses. With all her blunders, Soviet Russia had triumphed over enormous difficulties and taken great strides towards this new order. While the rest of the world was in the grip of the depression and going backward in some ways, in the Soviet country a great new world was being built up before our eyes. Russia, following the great Lenin, looked into the future and thought only of what was to be, while other countries lay numbed under the dead hand of the past and spent their energy in preserving the useless relics of a bygone age. In particular, I was impressed by the reports of the great progress made by the backward regions of Central Asia under the Soviet regime. In the balance, therefore, I was all in favour of Russia, and the presence and example of the Soviets was a bright and heartening phenomenon in a dark and dismal world.

*But Soviet Russia's success or failure, vastly important as it was as a practical experiment in establishing a communist state, did not affect the soundness of the theory of communism. The Bolsheviks may blunder or even fail because of national or international reasons and yet the communist theory may be correct. On the basis of that very theory it was absurd to copy blindly what had taken place in Russia, for its application depended on the particular conditions prevailing in the country in question and the stage of its historical development. Besides, India, or any other country, could profit by the triumphs as well as the inevitable mistakes of the Bolsheviks. Perhaps the Bolsheviks had tried to go too fast because, surrounded as they were by a world of enemies, they feared external aggression. A slower tempo might avoid much of the misery caused in the rural areas. But then the question arose if really radical results could be obtained by slowing down the rate of change. Reformism was an impossible solution of any vital problem at a critical moment when the basic structure had to be changed, and however slow the progress might be later on, the initial step must be a complete break with the existing order, which had fulfilled its purpose and was now only a drag on future progress.

* [[Russia]] apart, the theory and philosophy of [[Marxism]] lightened up many a dark corner of my mind. History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it, and it became an unfolding drama with some order and purpose, howsoever unconscious, behind it. In spite of the appalling waste and misery of the past and the present, the future was bright with hope, though many dangers intervened. It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me. It was true that there was plenty of dogma in official communism in Russia and elsewhere, and frequently heresy hunts were organised, That seemed to be deplorable, though it was not difficult to understand in view of the tremendous changes taking place rapidly in the Soviet countries when effective opposition might have resulted in catastrophic failure. The great world crisis and slump seemed to justify the Marxist analysis. While all other systems and theories were groping about in the dark, Marxism alone explained it more or less satisfactorily and offered a real solution.

*As this conviction grew upon me, I was filled with a new excitement and my depression at the non-success of civil disobedience grew much less. Was not the world marching rapidly towards the desired consummation? There were grave dangers of wars and catastrophes, but at any rate we were moving. There was no stagnation. Our national struggle became a stage in the longer journey, and it was as well that repression and suffering were tempering our people for future struggles and forcing them to consider the new ideas that were stirring the world. We would be the stronger and the more disciplined and hardened by the elimination of the weaker elements. Time was in our favour.

*As between [[fascism]] and [[communism]] my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the [[Humanism|humanist]] liberal tradition to get out of it completely. This [[Bourgeoisie|bourgeois]] background follows me about and is naturally a source of irritation to many communists. I dislike dogmatism, and the treatment of Karl Marx's writings or any other book as revealed scripture which cannot be challenged, and the regimentation and heresy hunts which seem to be a feature of modern communism. I dislike also much that has happened in Russia, and especially the excessive use of violence in normal times. But still I incline more and more towards a communist philosophy.

* '''Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.''' Yet, mysticism (in the narrow sense of the word) irritates me; it appears to be vague and soft and flabby, not a rigorous discipline of the mind but a surrender of mental faculties and living in a sea of emotional experience. The experience may lead occasionally to some insight into inner and less obvious processes, but it is also likely to lead to self-delusion. &lt;!-- p. 14 (1946) --&gt;

* For the first time I began to think, consciously and deliberately of religion and other worlds. The '''[[Hinduism|Hindu]] religion especially went up in my estimation;''' not the ritual or ceremonial part, but it's great books, the &quot;Upnishads&quot;, and the &quot;[[Bhagavad Gita]]&quot;.
** Jawaharlal Nehru, an autobiography, p. 15

* '''Essentially I am interested in this world, in this life, not in some other world or future life.''' Whether there is such a thing as soul, or whether there is survival after death or not, I do not know; and important as these questions are, they do not trouble me the least. &lt;!-- p. 15 (1946) --&gt;

*Marx may be wrong in some of his statements, or his theory of value; this I am not competent to judge. But he seems to me to have possessed quite an extraordinary degree of insight into social phenomena, and this insight was apparently due to the scientific method he adopted. This method, applied to past history as well as current events, helps us in understanding them far more than any other method of apporach, and it is because of this that the most revealing and keen analysis of the changes that are taking place in the world today come from Marxist writers. It is easy to point out that Marx ignored or underrated certain subsequent tendencies, like the rise of a revolutionary element in the middle class, which is so notable today. But the whole value of Marxism seems to me to lie in its absence of dogmatism, in its stress on a certain outlook and mode of approach, and in its attitude to action. That outlook helps us in understanding the social phenomena of our own times, and points out the way of action and escape.

*It is difficult to be patient with many communists; they have developed a peculiar method of irritating others. But they are a sorely tried people, and, outside the Soviet Union, they have to contend against enormous difficulties. I have always admitted their great courage and capacity for sacrifice. They suffer greatly, as unhappily untold millions suffer in various ways, but not blindly before a malign and all-powerful fate. They suffer as human beings, and there is a tragic nobility about such suffering.

* '''What the mysterious is I do not know. I do not call it God because God has come to mean much that I do not believe in.''' I find myself incapable of thinking of a deity or of any unknown supreme power in anthropomorphic terms, and the fact that many people think so is continually a source of surprise to me. Any idea of a personal God seems very odd to me. &lt;br&gt; Intellectually, I can appreciate to some extent the conception of [[w:Monism|monism]], and I have been attracted towards the [[w:Advaita Vedanta|Advaita]] (non-dualist) philosophy of the [[w:Vedanta|Vedanta]], though I do not presume to understand it in all its depth and intricacy, and I realise that merely an intellectual appreciation of such matters does not carry one far. &lt;!-- p. 16 (1946) --&gt;
* '''Many a Congressman was a communalist under his national cloak.''' But the Congress leadership stood firm and, on the whole, refused to side with either communal party, or rather with any communal group. '''Long ago, right at the commencement of non-co-operation or even earlier, Gandhiji had laid down his formula for solving the communal problem. According to him, it could only be solved by goodwill and the generosity of the majority group, and so he was prepared to agree to everything that the Muslims might demand. He wanted to win them over, not to bargain with them.''' With foresight and a true sense of values he grasped at the reality that was worthwhile; but others who thought they knew the market price of everything, and were ignorant of the true value of anything, stuck to the methods of the market-place. They saw the cost of purchase with painful clearness, but they had no appreciation of the worth of the article they might have bought. &lt;!-- p. 136 --&gt;
* '''I turned inevitably with goodwill towards communism, for, whatever its faults, it was at least not hypocritical and not imperialistic.''' It was not a doctrinal adherence, as I did not know much about the fine points of [[Communism]], my acquaintance being limited at the time to its broad features. There attracted me, as also the tremendous changes taking place in Russia. But Communists often irritated me by their dictatorial ways, their aggressive and rather vulgar methods, their habit of denouncing everybody who did not agree with them. This reaction was no doubt due, as they would say, to my own ''bourgeois'' education and up-bringing. &lt;!-- p. 163  --&gt; 
* '''Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind.''' History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it... '''It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me.&lt;!-- p. 362-363  --&gt;'''

* '''India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads.''' The spectacle of what is called religion, or at any rate organised religion, in India and elsewhere has filled me with horror, and I have frequently condemned it and wished to make a clean sweep of it. Almost always it seems to stand for blind belief and reaction, dogma and bigotry, superstition and exploitation, and the preservation of vested interests. And yet I knew well that there was something else in it, something which supplied a deep inner craving of human beings. How else could it have been the tremendous power it has been and brought peace and comfort to innumerable tortured souls? Was that peace merely the shelter of blind belief and absence of questioning, the calm that comes from being safe in harbour, protected from the storms of the open sea, or was it something more? '''In some cases certainly it was something more.''' &lt;br&gt; But organized religion, whatever its past may have been, today is largely an empty form devoid of real content. Mr. [[G. K. Chesterton]] has compared it (not his own particular brand of religion, but other!) to a fossil which is the form of an animal or organism from which all its own organic substance has entirely disappeared, but has kept its shape, because it has been filled up by some totally different substance. And, even where something of value still remains, it is enveloped by other and harmful contents. That seems to have happened in our Eastern religions as well as in the Western.&lt;!-- p. 241 --&gt;

*Because of this wide and comprehensive outlook, the real understanding communist develops to some extent an organic sense of social life. Politics for him cease to be a mere record of opportunism or a groping in the dark. The ideals and objectives he works forgive a meaning to the struggle and to the sacrifices be willingly faces. He feels that he is part of a grand army marching forward to realise human fate and destiny, and he has the sense of 'marching step by step with history'. Probably most communists are far from feeling all this. Perhaps only Lenin had this organic sense of life in its fullness which made his action so effective. But to a small extent every communist, who has understood the philosophy of his movement, has it.

* '''I knew that Gandhiji usually acts on instinct (I prefer to call it that than the &quot;inner voice&quot; or an answer to prayer) and very often that instinct is right.''' He has repeatedly shown what a wonderful knack he has of sensing the mass mind and of acting at the psychological moment. The reasons which he afterward adduces to justify his action are usually afterthoughts and seldom carry one very far. '''A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.'''
** On [[Mahatma Gandhi]]&lt;!-- p. 506 (1949) / p. 310 (1961) --&gt;

* Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Life is not all logic, and those ends will have to be varied from time to time to fit in with it, but some end must always be clearly envisaged. &lt;!-- p. 314 --&gt;

* '''To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition.''' But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification. Nor do I appreciate in the least the idealization of the &quot;simple peasant life.&quot; I have almost a horror of it, and instead of submitting to it myself I want to drag out even the peasantry from it, not to [[urbanization]], but to the spread of urban cultural facilities to rural areas. &lt;!-- p. 315 --&gt;

* In this matter, as in many others, my sympathies were with the Left.

* '''Organised religion allying itself to theology and often more concerned with its vested interests than with the things of the spirit encourages a temper which is the very opposite of science.''' It produces narrowness and intolerance, credulity and superstition, emotionalism and irrationalism. It tends to close and limit the mind of man and to produce a temper of a dependent, unfree person. &lt;br&gt; Even if God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him, so [[Voltaire]], said ... perhaps that is true, and indeed the mind of man has always been trying to fashion some such [[mental image]] or conception which grew with the mind's growth. '''But there is something also in the reverse proposition: even if God exist, it may be desirable not to look up to Him or to rely upon Him. Too much dependence on supernatural forces may lead, and has often led, to loss of self-reliance in man, and to a blunting of his capacity and creative ability.''' And yet some faith seems necessary in things of the spirit which are beyond the scope of our physical world, some reliance on moral, spiritual, and idealistic conceptions, or else we have no anchorage, no objectives or purpose in life. '''Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.''' &lt;!-- p. 524 (1946) --&gt;

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Autobiographies|τ]]</text>
      <sha1>4ft17z48d4j8cf4q3x3umrclvjkx48w</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964958</id>
      <parentid>3964955</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:21:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964958</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19970" sha1="3djxyc3f863u6gk8r2n738ahbv450yj" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Nehru1920.jpg|thumb|My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.]]
'''''[[w:An Autobiography (Nehru)|An Autobiography]]''''', also known as '''''Toward Freedom''''' (1936), is an [[autobiographical]] book written by [[Jawaharlal Nehru]] while he was in [[prison]] between June 1934 and February 1935, and before he became the first [[w:PM of India|Prime Minister of India]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Sahasrara.svg|thumb|right| [[Religion]] merges into [[mysticism]] and [[metaphysics]] and [[philosophy]]. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.]]
:&lt;small&gt;Several editions of Nehru's autobiography were published in his lifetime, including [[w:An Autobiography (1936)|An Autobiography (1936)]], ''Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, with Musings on Recent Events in India'' (1949), and ''Toward Freedom : The Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru'' (1958) Some passages occur in all of these, but with slight variations of wording.&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Sikh pilgrim at the Golden Temple (Harmandir Sahib) in Amritsar, India.jpg|thumb|right|India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and [[Hindu]] and [[Muslim]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads. ]]
[[File:Gandhi Nehru 1929.jpg|thumb|right|A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.]]
[[File:Tea picker in Nilgiris.jpg|thumb|right|To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition. But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification.]]
[[File:Children at market in Bangalore.jpg|thumb|right|Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.]]

*My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.&lt;!---Preface, 1936.---&gt;

*My thoughts travelled more to other countries, and I watched and studied, as far as I could in goal, the world situation in the grip of the great depression. I lead as many books as I could find on the subject, and the more I read the more fascinated I grew. India with her problems and struggles became just a part of this mighty world drama, of the great struggle of political and economic forces that was going on everywhere, nationally and internationally. In that struggle my own sympathies went increasingly towards the [[communist]] side.&lt;!---Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, The Bodley Head, London, 1955, p. 361.---&gt;

*I had long been drawn to socialism and communism, and Russia had appealed to me. Much in Soviet Russia I dislike - the ruthless suppression of all contrary opinion, the wholesale regimentation, the unnecessary violence (as I thought) in carrying out various policies. But there was no lack of violence and suppression in the capitalist world, and I realised more and more bow the very basis and foundation of our acquisitive society and property was violence. Without violence it could not continue for many days. A measure of political liberty meant little indeed when the fear of starvation was always compelling the vast majority of people everywhere to submit to the will of the few, to the greater glory and advantage of the latter.

*Violence was common in both places, but the violence of the capitalist order seemed inherent in it; whilst the violence of Russia, bad though it was, aimed at a new order based on peace and cooperation and real freedom for the masses. With all her blunders, Soviet Russia had triumphed over enormous difficulties and taken great strides towards this new order. While the rest of the world was in the grip of the depression and going backward in some ways, in the Soviet country a great new world was being built up before our eyes. Russia, following the great Lenin, looked into the future and thought only of what was to be, while other countries lay numbed under the dead hand of the past and spent their energy in preserving the useless relics of a bygone age. In particular, I was impressed by the reports of the great progress made by the backward regions of Central Asia under the Soviet regime. In the balance, therefore, I was all in favour of Russia, and the presence and example of the Soviets was a bright and heartening phenomenon in a dark and dismal world.

*But Soviet Russia's success or failure, vastly important as it was as a practical experiment in establishing a communist state, did not affect the soundness of the theory of communism. The Bolsheviks may blunder or even fail because of national or international reasons and yet the communist theory may be correct. On the basis of that very theory it was absurd to copy blindly what had taken place in Russia, for its application depended on the particular conditions prevailing in the country in question and the stage of its historical development. Besides, India, or any other country, could profit by the triumphs as well as the inevitable mistakes of the Bolsheviks. Perhaps the Bolsheviks had tried to go too fast because, surrounded as they were by a world of enemies, they feared external aggression. A slower tempo might avoid much of the misery caused in the rural areas. But then the question arose if really radical results could be obtained by slowing down the rate of change. Reformism was an impossible solution of any vital problem at a critical moment when the basic structure had to be changed, and however slow the progress might be later on, the initial step must be a complete break with the existing order, which had fulfilled its purpose and was now only a drag on future progress.

* [[Russia]] apart, the theory and philosophy of [[Marxism]] lightened up many a dark corner of my mind. History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it, and it became an unfolding drama with some order and purpose, howsoever unconscious, behind it. In spite of the appalling waste and misery of the past and the present, the future was bright with hope, though many dangers intervened. It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me. It was true that there was plenty of dogma in official communism in Russia and elsewhere, and frequently heresy hunts were organised, That seemed to be deplorable, though it was not difficult to understand in view of the tremendous changes taking place rapidly in the Soviet countries when effective opposition might have resulted in catastrophic failure. The great world crisis and slump seemed to justify the Marxist analysis. While all other systems and theories were groping about in the dark, Marxism alone explained it more or less satisfactorily and offered a real solution.

*As this conviction grew upon me, I was filled with a new excitement and my depression at the non-success of civil disobedience grew much less. Was not the world marching rapidly towards the desired consummation? There were grave dangers of wars and catastrophes, but at any rate we were moving. There was no stagnation. Our national struggle became a stage in the longer journey, and it was as well that repression and suffering were tempering our people for future struggles and forcing them to consider the new ideas that were stirring the world. We would be the stronger and the more disciplined and hardened by the elimination of the weaker elements. Time was in our favour.
[[File:Red flag waving.svg|thumb| As between [[fascism]] and [[communism]] my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the [[Humanism|humanist]] liberal tradition to get out of it completely.]]
*As between [[fascism]] and [[communism]] my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the [[Humanism|humanist]] liberal tradition to get out of it completely. This [[Bourgeoisie|bourgeois]] background follows me about and is naturally a source of irritation to many communists. I dislike dogmatism, and the treatment of Karl Marx's writings or any other book as revealed scripture which cannot be challenged, and the regimentation and heresy hunts which seem to be a feature of modern communism. I dislike also much that has happened in Russia, and especially the excessive use of violence in normal times. But still I incline more and more towards a communist philosophy.

* '''Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.''' Yet, mysticism (in the narrow sense of the word) irritates me; it appears to be vague and soft and flabby, not a rigorous discipline of the mind but a surrender of mental faculties and living in a sea of emotional experience. The experience may lead occasionally to some insight into inner and less obvious processes, but it is also likely to lead to self-delusion. &lt;!-- p. 14 (1946) --&gt;

* For the first time I began to think, consciously and deliberately of religion and other worlds. The '''[[Hinduism|Hindu]] religion especially went up in my estimation;''' not the ritual or ceremonial part, but it's great books, the &quot;Upnishads&quot;, and the &quot;[[Bhagavad Gita]]&quot;.
** Jawaharlal Nehru, an autobiography, p. 15

* '''Essentially I am interested in this world, in this life, not in some other world or future life.''' Whether there is such a thing as soul, or whether there is survival after death or not, I do not know; and important as these questions are, they do not trouble me the least. &lt;!-- p. 15 (1946) --&gt;

*Marx may be wrong in some of his statements, or his theory of value; this I am not competent to judge. But he seems to me to have possessed quite an extraordinary degree of insight into social phenomena, and this insight was apparently due to the scientific method he adopted. This method, applied to past history as well as current events, helps us in understanding them far more than any other method of apporach, and it is because of this that the most revealing and keen analysis of the changes that are taking place in the world today come from Marxist writers. It is easy to point out that Marx ignored or underrated certain subsequent tendencies, like the rise of a revolutionary element in the middle class, which is so notable today. But the whole value of Marxism seems to me to lie in its absence of dogmatism, in its stress on a certain outlook and mode of approach, and in its attitude to action. That outlook helps us in understanding the social phenomena of our own times, and points out the way of action and escape.

*It is difficult to be patient with many communists; they have developed a peculiar method of irritating others. But they are a sorely tried people, and, outside the Soviet Union, they have to contend against enormous difficulties. I have always admitted their great courage and capacity for sacrifice. They suffer greatly, as unhappily untold millions suffer in various ways, but not blindly before a malign and all-powerful fate. They suffer as human beings, and there is a tragic nobility about such suffering.

* '''What the mysterious is I do not know. I do not call it God because God has come to mean much that I do not believe in.''' I find myself incapable of thinking of a deity or of any unknown supreme power in anthropomorphic terms, and the fact that many people think so is continually a source of surprise to me. Any idea of a personal God seems very odd to me. &lt;br&gt; Intellectually, I can appreciate to some extent the conception of [[w:Monism|monism]], and I have been attracted towards the [[w:Advaita Vedanta|Advaita]] (non-dualist) philosophy of the [[w:Vedanta|Vedanta]], though I do not presume to understand it in all its depth and intricacy, and I realise that merely an intellectual appreciation of such matters does not carry one far. &lt;!-- p. 16 (1946) --&gt;
* '''Many a Congressman was a communalist under his national cloak.''' But the Congress leadership stood firm and, on the whole, refused to side with either communal party, or rather with any communal group. '''Long ago, right at the commencement of non-co-operation or even earlier, Gandhiji had laid down his formula for solving the communal problem. According to him, it could only be solved by goodwill and the generosity of the majority group, and so he was prepared to agree to everything that the Muslims might demand. He wanted to win them over, not to bargain with them.''' With foresight and a true sense of values he grasped at the reality that was worthwhile; but others who thought they knew the market price of everything, and were ignorant of the true value of anything, stuck to the methods of the market-place. They saw the cost of purchase with painful clearness, but they had no appreciation of the worth of the article they might have bought. &lt;!-- p. 136 --&gt;
* '''I turned inevitably with goodwill towards communism, for, whatever its faults, it was at least not hypocritical and not imperialistic.''' It was not a doctrinal adherence, as I did not know much about the fine points of [[Communism]], my acquaintance being limited at the time to its broad features. There attracted me, as also the tremendous changes taking place in Russia. But Communists often irritated me by their dictatorial ways, their aggressive and rather vulgar methods, their habit of denouncing everybody who did not agree with them. This reaction was no doubt due, as they would say, to my own ''bourgeois'' education and up-bringing. &lt;!-- p. 163  --&gt; 
* '''Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind.''' History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it... '''It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me.&lt;!-- p. 362-363  --&gt;'''

* '''India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads.''' The spectacle of what is called religion, or at any rate organised religion, in India and elsewhere has filled me with horror, and I have frequently condemned it and wished to make a clean sweep of it. Almost always it seems to stand for blind belief and reaction, dogma and bigotry, superstition and exploitation, and the preservation of vested interests. And yet I knew well that there was something else in it, something which supplied a deep inner craving of human beings. How else could it have been the tremendous power it has been and brought peace and comfort to innumerable tortured souls? Was that peace merely the shelter of blind belief and absence of questioning, the calm that comes from being safe in harbour, protected from the storms of the open sea, or was it something more? '''In some cases certainly it was something more.''' &lt;br&gt; But organized religion, whatever its past may have been, today is largely an empty form devoid of real content. Mr. [[G. K. Chesterton]] has compared it (not his own particular brand of religion, but other!) to a fossil which is the form of an animal or organism from which all its own organic substance has entirely disappeared, but has kept its shape, because it has been filled up by some totally different substance. And, even where something of value still remains, it is enveloped by other and harmful contents. That seems to have happened in our Eastern religions as well as in the Western.&lt;!-- p. 241 --&gt;

*Because of this wide and comprehensive outlook, the real understanding communist develops to some extent an organic sense of social life. Politics for him cease to be a mere record of opportunism or a groping in the dark. The ideals and objectives he works forgive a meaning to the struggle and to the sacrifices be willingly faces. He feels that he is part of a grand army marching forward to realise human fate and destiny, and he has the sense of 'marching step by step with history'. Probably most communists are far from feeling all this. Perhaps only Lenin had this organic sense of life in its fullness which made his action so effective. But to a small extent every communist, who has understood the philosophy of his movement, has it.

* '''I knew that Gandhiji usually acts on instinct (I prefer to call it that than the &quot;inner voice&quot; or an answer to prayer) and very often that instinct is right.''' He has repeatedly shown what a wonderful knack he has of sensing the mass mind and of acting at the psychological moment. The reasons which he afterward adduces to justify his action are usually afterthoughts and seldom carry one very far. '''A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.'''
** On [[Mahatma Gandhi]]&lt;!-- p. 506 (1949) / p. 310 (1961) --&gt;

* Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Life is not all logic, and those ends will have to be varied from time to time to fit in with it, but some end must always be clearly envisaged. &lt;!-- p. 314 --&gt;

* '''To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition.''' But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification. Nor do I appreciate in the least the idealization of the &quot;simple peasant life.&quot; I have almost a horror of it, and instead of submitting to it myself I want to drag out even the peasantry from it, not to [[urbanization]], but to the spread of urban cultural facilities to rural areas. &lt;!-- p. 315 --&gt;

* In this matter, as in many others, my sympathies were with the Left.

* '''Organised religion allying itself to theology and often more concerned with its vested interests than with the things of the spirit encourages a temper which is the very opposite of science.''' It produces narrowness and intolerance, credulity and superstition, emotionalism and irrationalism. It tends to close and limit the mind of man and to produce a temper of a dependent, unfree person. &lt;br&gt; Even if God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him, so [[Voltaire]], said ... perhaps that is true, and indeed the mind of man has always been trying to fashion some such [[mental image]] or conception which grew with the mind's growth. '''But there is something also in the reverse proposition: even if God exist, it may be desirable not to look up to Him or to rely upon Him. Too much dependence on supernatural forces may lead, and has often led, to loss of self-reliance in man, and to a blunting of his capacity and creative ability.''' And yet some faith seems necessary in things of the spirit which are beyond the scope of our physical world, some reliance on moral, spiritual, and idealistic conceptions, or else we have no anchorage, no objectives or purpose in life. '''Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.''' &lt;!-- p. 524 (1946) --&gt;

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Autobiographies|τ]]</text>
      <sha1>3djxyc3f863u6gk8r2n738ahbv450yj</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964960</id>
      <parentid>3964958</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:22:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964960</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="19985" sha1="b442qrge08ju6vti5rf8427d92hj9xl" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Nehru1920.jpg|thumb|My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.]]
'''''[[w:An Autobiography (Nehru)|An Autobiography]]''''', also known as '''''Toward Freedom''''' (1936), is an [[autobiographical]] book written by [[Jawaharlal Nehru]] while he was in [[prison]] between June 1934 and February 1935, and before he became the first [[w:PM of India|Prime Minister of India]].

== Quotes ==
[[File:Sahasrara.svg|thumb|right| [[Religion]] merges into [[mysticism]] and [[metaphysics]] and [[philosophy]]. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.]]
:&lt;small&gt;Several editions of Nehru's autobiography were published in his lifetime, including [[w:An Autobiography (1936)|An Autobiography (1936)]], ''Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, with Musings on Recent Events in India'' (1949), and ''Toward Freedom : The Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru'' (1958) Some passages occur in all of these, but with slight variations of wording.&lt;/small&gt;
[[File:Sikh pilgrim at the Golden Temple (Harmandir Sahib) in Amritsar, India.jpg|thumb|right|India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and [[Hindu]] and [[Muslim]] and [[Sikhs|Sikh]] and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads. ]]
[[File:Gandhi Nehru 1929.jpg|thumb|right|A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.]]
[[File:Tea picker in Nilgiris.jpg|thumb|right|To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition. But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification.]]
[[File:Children at market in Bangalore.jpg|thumb|right|Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.]]

*My intention was to trace, as far as I could, my own mental development and not write a survey of recent Indian history.&lt;!---Preface, 1936.---&gt;

*My thoughts travelled more to other countries, and I watched and studied, as far as I could in goal, the world situation in the grip of the great depression. I lead as many books as I could find on the subject, and the more I read the more fascinated I grew. India with her problems and struggles became just a part of this mighty world drama, of the great struggle of political and economic forces that was going on everywhere, nationally and internationally. In that struggle my own sympathies went increasingly towards the [[communist]] side.&lt;!---Jawaharlal Nehru, An Autobiography, The Bodley Head, London, 1955, p. 361.---&gt;

*I had long been drawn to socialism and communism, and Russia had appealed to me. Much in Soviet Russia I dislike - the ruthless suppression of all contrary opinion, the wholesale regimentation, the unnecessary violence (as I thought) in carrying out various policies. But there was no lack of violence and suppression in the capitalist world, and I realised more and more bow the very basis and foundation of our acquisitive society and property was violence. Without violence it could not continue for many days. A measure of political liberty meant little indeed when the fear of starvation was always compelling the vast majority of people everywhere to submit to the will of the few, to the greater glory and advantage of the latter.

*Violence was common in both places, but the violence of the capitalist order seemed inherent in it; whilst the violence of Russia, bad though it was, aimed at a new order based on peace and cooperation and real freedom for the masses. With all her blunders, Soviet Russia had triumphed over enormous difficulties and taken great strides towards this new order. While the rest of the world was in the grip of the depression and going backward in some ways, in the Soviet country a great new world was being built up before our eyes. Russia, following the great Lenin, looked into the future and thought only of what was to be, while other countries lay numbed under the dead hand of the past and spent their energy in preserving the useless relics of a bygone age. In particular, I was impressed by the reports of the great progress made by the backward regions of Central Asia under the Soviet regime. In the balance, therefore, I was all in favour of Russia, and the presence and example of the Soviets was a bright and heartening phenomenon in a dark and dismal world.

*But Soviet Russia's success or failure, vastly important as it was as a practical experiment in establishing a communist state, did not affect the soundness of the theory of communism. The Bolsheviks may blunder or even fail because of national or international reasons and yet the communist theory may be correct. On the basis of that very theory it was absurd to copy blindly what had taken place in Russia, for its application depended on the particular conditions prevailing in the country in question and the stage of its historical development. Besides, India, or any other country, could profit by the triumphs as well as the inevitable mistakes of the Bolsheviks. Perhaps the Bolsheviks had tried to go too fast because, surrounded as they were by a world of enemies, they feared external aggression. A slower tempo might avoid much of the misery caused in the rural areas. But then the question arose if really radical results could be obtained by slowing down the rate of change. Reformism was an impossible solution of any vital problem at a critical moment when the basic structure had to be changed, and however slow the progress might be later on, the initial step must be a complete break with the existing order, which had fulfilled its purpose and was now only a drag on future progress.

* [[Russia]] apart, the theory and philosophy of [[Marxism]] lightened up many a dark corner of my mind. History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it, and it became an unfolding drama with some order and purpose, howsoever unconscious, behind it. In spite of the appalling waste and misery of the past and the present, the future was bright with hope, though many dangers intervened. It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me. It was true that there was plenty of dogma in official communism in Russia and elsewhere, and frequently heresy hunts were organised, That seemed to be deplorable, though it was not difficult to understand in view of the tremendous changes taking place rapidly in the Soviet countries when effective opposition might have resulted in catastrophic failure. The great world crisis and slump seemed to justify the Marxist analysis. While all other systems and theories were groping about in the dark, Marxism alone explained it more or less satisfactorily and offered a real solution.

*As this conviction grew upon me, I was filled with a new excitement and my depression at the non-success of civil disobedience grew much less. Was not the world marching rapidly towards the desired consummation? There were grave dangers of wars and catastrophes, but at any rate we were moving. There was no stagnation. Our national struggle became a stage in the longer journey, and it was as well that repression and suffering were tempering our people for future struggles and forcing them to consider the new ideas that were stirring the world. We would be the stronger and the more disciplined and hardened by the elimination of the weaker elements. Time was in our favour.
[[File:Red flag waving.svg|thumb| As between [[fascism]] and [[communism]] my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the [[Humanism|humanist]] liberal tradition to get out of it completely.]]
*As between [[fascism]] and [[communism]] my sympathies are entirely with communism. As these pages will show, I am very far from being a communist. My roots are still perhaps partly in the nineteenth century, and I have been too much influenced by the [[Humanism|humanist]] liberal tradition to get out of it completely. This [[Bourgeoisie|bourgeois]] background follows me about and is naturally a source of irritation to many communists. I dislike dogmatism, and the treatment of Karl Marx's writings or any other book as revealed scripture which cannot be challenged, and the regimentation and heresy hunts which seem to be a feature of modern communism. I dislike also much that has happened in Russia, and especially the excessive use of violence in normal times. But still I incline more and more towards a communist philosophy.

* '''Religion merges into mysticism and metaphysics and philosophy. There have been great mystics, attractive figures, who cannot easily be disposed of as self-deluded fools.''' Yet, mysticism (in the narrow sense of the word) irritates me; it appears to be vague and soft and flabby, not a rigorous discipline of the mind but a surrender of mental faculties and living in a sea of emotional experience. The experience may lead occasionally to some insight into inner and less obvious processes, but it is also likely to lead to self-delusion. &lt;!-- p. 14 (1946) --&gt;

* For the first time I began to think, consciously and deliberately of religion and other worlds. The '''[[Hinduism|Hindu]] religion especially went up in my estimation;''' not the ritual or ceremonial part, but it's great books, the &quot;[[Upanishads|Upnishads]]&quot;, and the &quot;[[Bhagavad Gita]]&quot;.
** Jawaharlal Nehru, an autobiography, p. 15

* '''Essentially I am interested in this world, in this life, not in some other world or future life.''' Whether there is such a thing as soul, or whether there is survival after death or not, I do not know; and important as these questions are, they do not trouble me the least. &lt;!-- p. 15 (1946) --&gt;

*Marx may be wrong in some of his statements, or his theory of value; this I am not competent to judge. But he seems to me to have possessed quite an extraordinary degree of insight into social phenomena, and this insight was apparently due to the scientific method he adopted. This method, applied to past history as well as current events, helps us in understanding them far more than any other method of apporach, and it is because of this that the most revealing and keen analysis of the changes that are taking place in the world today come from Marxist writers. It is easy to point out that Marx ignored or underrated certain subsequent tendencies, like the rise of a revolutionary element in the middle class, which is so notable today. But the whole value of Marxism seems to me to lie in its absence of dogmatism, in its stress on a certain outlook and mode of approach, and in its attitude to action. That outlook helps us in understanding the social phenomena of our own times, and points out the way of action and escape.

*It is difficult to be patient with many communists; they have developed a peculiar method of irritating others. But they are a sorely tried people, and, outside the Soviet Union, they have to contend against enormous difficulties. I have always admitted their great courage and capacity for sacrifice. They suffer greatly, as unhappily untold millions suffer in various ways, but not blindly before a malign and all-powerful fate. They suffer as human beings, and there is a tragic nobility about such suffering.

* '''What the mysterious is I do not know. I do not call it God because God has come to mean much that I do not believe in.''' I find myself incapable of thinking of a deity or of any unknown supreme power in anthropomorphic terms, and the fact that many people think so is continually a source of surprise to me. Any idea of a personal God seems very odd to me. &lt;br&gt; Intellectually, I can appreciate to some extent the conception of [[w:Monism|monism]], and I have been attracted towards the [[w:Advaita Vedanta|Advaita]] (non-dualist) philosophy of the [[w:Vedanta|Vedanta]], though I do not presume to understand it in all its depth and intricacy, and I realise that merely an intellectual appreciation of such matters does not carry one far. &lt;!-- p. 16 (1946) --&gt;
* '''Many a Congressman was a communalist under his national cloak.''' But the Congress leadership stood firm and, on the whole, refused to side with either communal party, or rather with any communal group. '''Long ago, right at the commencement of non-co-operation or even earlier, Gandhiji had laid down his formula for solving the communal problem. According to him, it could only be solved by goodwill and the generosity of the majority group, and so he was prepared to agree to everything that the Muslims might demand. He wanted to win them over, not to bargain with them.''' With foresight and a true sense of values he grasped at the reality that was worthwhile; but others who thought they knew the market price of everything, and were ignorant of the true value of anything, stuck to the methods of the market-place. They saw the cost of purchase with painful clearness, but they had no appreciation of the worth of the article they might have bought. &lt;!-- p. 136 --&gt;
* '''I turned inevitably with goodwill towards communism, for, whatever its faults, it was at least not hypocritical and not imperialistic.''' It was not a doctrinal adherence, as I did not know much about the fine points of [[Communism]], my acquaintance being limited at the time to its broad features. There attracted me, as also the tremendous changes taking place in Russia. But Communists often irritated me by their dictatorial ways, their aggressive and rather vulgar methods, their habit of denouncing everybody who did not agree with them. This reaction was no doubt due, as they would say, to my own ''bourgeois'' education and up-bringing. &lt;!-- p. 163  --&gt; 
* '''Russia apart, the theory and philosophy of Marxism lightened up many a dark corner of my mind.''' History came to have a new meaning for me. The Marxist interpretation threw a flood of light on it... '''It was the essential freedom from dogma and the scientific outlook of Marxism that appealed to me.&lt;!-- p. 362-363  --&gt;'''

* '''India is supposed to be a religious country above everything else, and Hindu and Muslim and Sikh and others take pride in their faiths and testify to their truth by breaking heads.''' The spectacle of what is called religion, or at any rate organised religion, in India and elsewhere has filled me with horror, and I have frequently condemned it and wished to make a clean sweep of it. Almost always it seems to stand for blind belief and reaction, dogma and bigotry, superstition and exploitation, and the preservation of vested interests. And yet I knew well that there was something else in it, something which supplied a deep inner craving of human beings. How else could it have been the tremendous power it has been and brought peace and comfort to innumerable tortured souls? Was that peace merely the shelter of blind belief and absence of questioning, the calm that comes from being safe in harbour, protected from the storms of the open sea, or was it something more? '''In some cases certainly it was something more.''' &lt;br&gt; But organized religion, whatever its past may have been, today is largely an empty form devoid of real content. Mr. [[G. K. Chesterton]] has compared it (not his own particular brand of religion, but other!) to a fossil which is the form of an animal or organism from which all its own organic substance has entirely disappeared, but has kept its shape, because it has been filled up by some totally different substance. And, even where something of value still remains, it is enveloped by other and harmful contents. That seems to have happened in our Eastern religions as well as in the Western.&lt;!-- p. 241 --&gt;

*Because of this wide and comprehensive outlook, the real understanding communist develops to some extent an organic sense of social life. Politics for him cease to be a mere record of opportunism or a groping in the dark. The ideals and objectives he works forgive a meaning to the struggle and to the sacrifices be willingly faces. He feels that he is part of a grand army marching forward to realise human fate and destiny, and he has the sense of 'marching step by step with history'. Probably most communists are far from feeling all this. Perhaps only Lenin had this organic sense of life in its fullness which made his action so effective. But to a small extent every communist, who has understood the philosophy of his movement, has it.

* '''I knew that Gandhiji usually acts on instinct (I prefer to call it that than the &quot;inner voice&quot; or an answer to prayer) and very often that instinct is right.''' He has repeatedly shown what a wonderful knack he has of sensing the mass mind and of acting at the psychological moment. The reasons which he afterward adduces to justify his action are usually afterthoughts and seldom carry one very far. '''A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his action.'''
** On [[Mahatma Gandhi]]&lt;!-- p. 506 (1949) / p. 310 (1961) --&gt;

* Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Life is not all logic, and those ends will have to be varied from time to time to fit in with it, but some end must always be clearly envisaged. &lt;!-- p. 314 --&gt;

* '''To be in good moral condition requires at least as much training as to be in good physical condition.''' But that certainly does not mean asceticism or self-mortification. Nor do I appreciate in the least the idealization of the &quot;simple peasant life.&quot; I have almost a horror of it, and instead of submitting to it myself I want to drag out even the peasantry from it, not to [[urbanization]], but to the spread of urban cultural facilities to rural areas. &lt;!-- p. 315 --&gt;

* In this matter, as in many others, my sympathies were with the Left.

* '''Organised religion allying itself to theology and often more concerned with its vested interests than with the things of the spirit encourages a temper which is the very opposite of science.''' It produces narrowness and intolerance, credulity and superstition, emotionalism and irrationalism. It tends to close and limit the mind of man and to produce a temper of a dependent, unfree person. &lt;br&gt; Even if God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him, so [[Voltaire]], said ... perhaps that is true, and indeed the mind of man has always been trying to fashion some such [[mental image]] or conception which grew with the mind's growth. '''But there is something also in the reverse proposition: even if God exist, it may be desirable not to look up to Him or to rely upon Him. Too much dependence on supernatural forces may lead, and has often led, to loss of self-reliance in man, and to a blunting of his capacity and creative ability.''' And yet some faith seems necessary in things of the spirit which are beyond the scope of our physical world, some reliance on moral, spiritual, and idealistic conceptions, or else we have no anchorage, no objectives or purpose in life. '''Whether we believe in God or not, it is impossible not to believe in something, whether we call it a creative life-giving force, or vital energy inherent in matter which gives it its capacity for self-movement and change and growth, or by some other name, something that is as real, though elusive, as life is real when contrasted with death.''' &lt;!-- p. 524 (1946) --&gt;

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Autobiographies|τ]]</text>
      <sha1>b442qrge08ju6vti5rf8427d92hj9xl</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Bharatiya Janata Party</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>259646</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964923</id>
      <parentid>3944382</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:58:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Dronebogus</username>
        <id>3078761</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964923</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="13273" sha1="c0ln63dxwy2rdc3k24w2jmra9zbz7xv" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Bunga Teratai Yofieart.jpg|thumb|My philosophy is to use the stones hurled at me to make a bridge for myself; I believe in proving my critics wrong through my work. I keep saying, the more muck you throw at me, the brighter will the BJP lotus bloom. That is the nature of the lotus, it rises out of ''kīchaṛ'' (slush) to create exquisite beauty. - Narendra Modi ]]The '''[[w:Bharatiya Janata Party|Bharatiya Janata Party]]''' ('''BJP'''; transl. Indian People's Party) is a [[Right-wing politics|right-wing]] to [[Far-right politics|far-right]] political party in [[India]], and one of the two major Indian political parties alongside the [[Indian National Congress]]. The BJP emerged from [[Shyama Prasad Mukherjee]]'s Bharatiya Jana Sangh. Since 2014, it has been the ruling political party in India under the incumbent [[Prime Minister of India|prime minister]] [[Narendra Modi]]. The BJP has close ideological and organisational links to the [[Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh]] (RSS), a right-wing paramilitary volunteer organisation. The party's policies adhere to [[Hindutva]], a [[Hindu nationalism|Hindu nationalist]] ideology. As of March 2026, it is the country's biggest political party in terms of representation in [[Parliament of India|the parliament]] as well as state legislatures.

== Quotes ==
&lt;!-- alphabetical list by author --&gt;


* [T]he election of the [[Hindu nationalism|Hindu nationalist]] Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) has been linked to incidents of violence against members of [[Dalit]], [[Islam in India|Muslim]], tribal and [[Christianity in India|Christian]] communities. Reports document the use of inflammatory remarks by BJP leaders against [[Minority group|minority groups]], and the rise of vigilantism targeting Muslims and Dalits.
** [[E. Tendayi Achiume]], [https://www.ohchr.org/sites/default/files/Documents/HRBodies/HRCouncil/AdvisoryCom/EliminationRacism/A_73_305.pdf &quot;Contemporary forms of racism, racial discrimination, xenophobia and related intolerance&quot;], [[w:OHCHR|OHCHR]], 6 August 2018. Quoted in [[Christophe Jaffrelot]], [https://www.google.com/books/edition/Modi_s_India/-fuUEAAAQBAJ?hl=en&amp;gbpv=1&amp;pg=PA452 ''Modi's India: Hindu Nationalism and the Rise of Ethnic Democracy''], Princeton University Press, April 11, 2023, p. 452.

*Justice for all and appeasement of none.
**BJP's credo. cited in Times of India August 15, 2018 [https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/justice-for-all-appeasement-of-none-bjps-credo-nitin-gadkari/articleshow/65408219.cms]

* To say that the BJP is [[Communalism (South Asia)|communal]] is absolutely absurd and without any basis.
** M. C. Chagla. Speech at BJP Plenary Session, quoted also in L.K. Advani: Presidential Address, Plenary Session (1995), and quoted from Elst, Koenraad (2001). Decolonizing the Hindu mind: Ideological development of Hindu revivalism. New Delhi: Rupa. p.554

*After the [[Ayodhya]] demolition, the Congress government threatened to outlaw the BJP... but several [[Socialism|socialist]] and [[Caste system in India|casteist]] parties, the BJP's erstwhile allies in the struggle against [[The Emergency (India)|the Emergency]], refused to support the necessary legislative reform because they remembered all too well how small the distance is between such rhetoric of &quot;protecting [[democracy]] against the communal forces&quot; and the imposition of dictatorship... In several cases, moreover, elected candidates for the BJP or the [[w:Shiv_Sena|Shiv Sena]] have been taken to court for &quot;corrupt electoral practices&quot;, meaning the &quot;use&quot; of religion in their campaigns; some of them won their cases, some of them lost, but the danger inherent in openly identifying with the Hindu cause was certainly driven home. [...] &lt;br&gt; Without exaggeration, the BJP's Ayodhya campaign was the single biggest [[public relations]] disaster in world history. [...] Even though the BJP's White Paper on Ayodhya and the [[w:Rama_Temple_Movement|Rama Temple Movement]] (1993) is a well-written and generally complete document, certainly the best chronology of the whole Ayodhya dispute, it leaves out a discussion of the one historical fact that justifies and lends importance to the Ayodhya movement, viz. that the demolition of the medieval Rama temple at the site was by no means an isolated event, but a necessary consequence of Islamic doctrine. 
**Elst, Koenraad. (1997) BJP vis-à-vis Hindu Resurgence

*Today the BJP is the only major party with a fully developed and actually functioning intra-party democracy.
** Elst, K. (2010). The saffron swastika: The notion of &quot;Hindu fascism&quot;. (p671)

*The strange thing about the BJP is that its voters consider it a [[Hindu]] party, its enemies denounce it as a [[Hindu]] party, but the party will call itself anything except a [[Hindu]] party.
**Koenraad Elst, BJP vis-a-vis [[Hindu]] Resurgence. Quoted from Makarand Paranjape (2017) Imagining India: Aurobindo, Ambedkar, and After, South Asian Review, 28:1, 159-185, DOI: 10.1080/02759527.2007.11932508

*However, contrary to what the observers all think or say, the present BJP government under Narendra Modi, while numerically strong, is ideologically extremely weak. It is not in any way Hinduizing or &quot;saffronizing&quot; the polity or the [[Education in India|education system]]. It is continuing the Congressite-[[Left-wing politics|Leftist]] [[Anti-Hindu sentiment|anti-Hindu]] policies mandated by the [[Constitution of India|Constitution]], or at best looking the other way but not changing the Constitution to put a definitive stop to such policies. Thus, subsidized schools can be Christian or Muslim, but not Hindu: in the latter case, either they get taken over by the [[Government of India|state]] and [[Secularism in India|secularized]], or at best, they have to do without subsidies. [[Temple|Temples]] are [[Nationalism|nationalized]] and their [[income]] channeled to non-Hindu purposes, a treatment against which the law protects [[Church|churches]] and [[Mosque|mosques]]. And this is no less the case in BJP-ruled states, where the Government could have chosen not to avail of the opportunities given to it by the Constitution. 
**    [[Koenraad Elst|Elst, Koenraad]]. Hindu Dharma and the Culture Wars. (2019). New Delhi : Rupa. Chapter 16, RSS in western media

* The record of BJP governance has utterly disproved the shrill allegations of “Hindu fascism”.
**Elst K. Return of the Swastika : Hate and Hysteria versus Hindu Sanity (2007) (Ch 1)

* [B]oth of these forces are driving illiberal political movements in many parts of the world... India was a liberal society created by [[Jawaharlal Nehru|Nehru]] and [[Mahatma Gandhi|Gandhi]] but under the [[Bharatiya Janata Party|BJP]] and Prime Minister [[Narendra Modi|Modi]] it's shifted its national identity to one based on [[Hindu nationalism]]. In [[Hungary]], with the rise of [[Viktor Orbán]] and the {{w|Fidesz}} party Hugarian national identity has been redefined. Orbán has said Hugarian national identity is based on Hugarian ethnicity, which... is one of the reasons that [[World War II]] happened, because the [[Germans]] wanted to define [[Germany|German]] identity on the basis of German ethnicity, and there were many Germans living in... surrounding... [[central Europe]]... and that was... the trigger that led to the outbreak of the [[World War II|Second World War]].
** [[Francis Fukuyama]], A YouTube Creative Commons video, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9GhbZeXmT0&amp;t=325s Dr Francis Fukuyama on liberalism and the 2020 US presidential election] (Nov 18, 2020), [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9GhbZeXmT0&amp;t=1037s 17:17]

* The BJP seeks to link up internationally with the democratic, non-racist [[Conservatism|Right]].
** Gérard Heuzé, ''Où va l'Inde moderne''. p. 12. Quoted in Elst, K. (2010). ''The saffron swastika: The notion of &quot;Hindu fascism&quot;''. p. 713.

* The BJP is not a communal party; it cannot be, for the simple reason that [[Hindus]] have never been, and are not, a community in the accepted sense of the term. They represent an ancient civilization not known either to draw a boundary between the faithful and the faithless, the blessed and the damned, or to engage in heresy hunting and its counterpart, persecution of other faiths. [[Hindus]] are, in western terms, pagans.
** Girilal Jain, Page 149, The [[Hindu]] Phenomenon, {{ISBN|81-86112-32-4}}.

*Unlike [[Islamic fundamentalism|Islamic fundamentalists]], the BJP does not claim to possess a blueprint. It shall have to struggle to evolve an Indian approach to modern problems.
**Girilal Jain, Page 105, The [[Hindu]] Phenomenon, {{ISBN|81-86112-32-4}}.

* In both [[India]] and [[Pakistan]] civilian politics have taken on a [[military]] tinge, with some political parties sponsoring paramilitary organisations whose members wear uniforms, march in formation with flags and carry sticks to menace their opponents. Or in the case of India’s Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) it looks more as though the paramilitary [[Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh]] (RSS) sponsors it.
** [[Margaret MacMillan]], ''War: How Conflict Shapes Us'' (2020)

* As far as the BJP is concerned, our belief has been the same for years. '''Justice to all, appeasement of none.''' We cannot support divisive politics. We strongly believe in President [[A. P. J. Abdul Kalam]] when he says we need 'unity of minds'. '''People who played the politics of appeasement have ruined the country, not us.''' Blame them.
**Narendra Modi &lt;small&gt; Interview given to ''[[w:Rediff.com|Rediff]]'', [http://www.rediff.com/news/2002/aug/27inter.htm &quot;'The BJP is unstoppable'&quot;] (27 August 2002).&lt;/small&gt;

*'''In some states, hundreds of our workers have been killed because of their political views. Political untouchability is gaining ground by the day. In some places, just the name of BJP is enough to create an atmosphere of untouchability.... Why are our workers killed or attacked in Kashmir, Kerala or Bengal? It is shameful and anti-democratic... But today, in the political canvas of the nation, if there is one party that lives and breathes democracy, it is the BJP.'''
**Narendra Modi quoted in BJP Lives And Breathes Democracy Despite Facing Political Untouchability And Violence’: PM Modi In Varanasi [https://swarajyamag.com/insta/bjp-lives-and-breathes-democracy-despite-facing-political-untouchability-and-violence-pm-modi-in-varanasi] [https://www.ndtv.com/india-news/after-mega-victory-pm-narendra-modi-says-the-bjp-suffered-political-untouchability-violence-2043561 NDTV]

*My [[philosophy]] is to use the stones hurled at me to make a bridge for myself; I believe in proving my critics wrong through my work. I keep saying, the more muck you throw at me, the brighter will the BJP [[lotus]] bloom. That is the nature of the lotus, it rises out of keechhad (slush) to create exquisite beauty.
**Narendra Modi in interview 2013, quoted from Kishwar, Madhu (2014). Modi, Muslims and media: Voices from Narendra Modi's Gujarat. p.164

* The difference between Congress and BJP cannot be more apparent... We stand with Kashmiri Pandits, they stand with those who want two Constitutions and two PMs in the country. We stand to protect and preserve national integrity, they stand to protect those who are guilty of sedition. We stand to ensure quality health to women and children, while it is proven that they loot the money meant for women and children. We stand for democracy, they stand for dynasty, we stand for India First, they stand for Family First.
**Narendra Modi. &quot;2014 was a mandate for hope and aspiration, 2019 is about confidence and acceleration&quot;, 2019  &lt;small&gt;Interview, April 18, 2019 with Times of India [https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/2014-was-a-mandate-for-hope-and-aspiration-2019-is-about-confidence-and-acceleration-pm-modi/articleshow/68920680.cms 2014 was a mandate for hope and aspiration, 2019 is about confidence and acceleration]&lt;/small&gt;

* In 2008, Hindutva leader [[w:Baikunth Lal Sharma|B.L. Sharma]] 'Prem' held a secret meeting with key members of a [[Terrorism in India|terrorist]] group responsible for a nationwide [[Bombs|bombing]] campaign [[w:Violence against Muslims in India|targeting Muslims]]. [...] Like's Europe's mainstream right-wing parties, the BJP has condemned the [[w:Right-wing terrorism|terrorism of the right]] — but not the thought system which drives it. Its refusal to engage in serious introspection, or even to unequivocally condemn Hindutva violence, has been nothing short of disgraceful. [[w:Liberalism in India|Liberal]] parties, including the Congress, have been equally evasive in their critique of both Hindutva and [[Islamist]] [[Islamic terrorism|terrorism]]. Besieged as India is by multiple [[fundamentalism]]s, in the throes of a social crisis that runs far deeper than in Europe, with institutions far weaker, it must reflect carefully on [[Anders Behring Breivik|Mr. Brevik]]'s story — or run real risks to its survival.
** [[Praveen Swami]], ''[https://www.thehindu.com/opinion/lead/anders-breivik-europes-blind-right-eye/article2290619.ece Anders Breivik &amp; Europe's blind right eye]'' (July 25, 2011), ''{{w|The Hindu}}''

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia-inline}}

[[Category:Bharatiya Janata Party| ]]
[[Category:Hindu nationalism]]</text>
      <sha1>c0ln63dxwy2rdc3k24w2jmra9zbz7xv</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Peanuts TV specials</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>260040</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965117</id>
      <parentid>3390489</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:47:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3965117</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="111" sha1="9qeuesabpmvjlr251tdxalb6vqw68ax" xml:space="preserve">{{wikipediacat|Peanuts animated specials}}
[[Category:Animated TV specials]]
[[Category:Peanuts (comic strip)]]</text>
      <sha1>9qeuesabpmvjlr251tdxalb6vqw68ax</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965118</id>
      <parentid>3965117</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:48:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3965118</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="113" sha1="id2e48dout8hn3axlb0sq2b1n9f9okx" xml:space="preserve">{{wikipediacat|Peanuts television specials}}
[[Category:Animated TV specials]]
[[Category:Peanuts (comic strip)]]</text>
      <sha1>id2e48dout8hn3axlb0sq2b1n9f9okx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>261113</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965074</id>
      <parentid>3958212</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:53:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965074</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6365" sha1="8q0vi0vhp0afajmazgg8wahyulpxzzr" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Adventure Time (season 1)|1]] [[Adventure Time (season 2)|2]] [[Adventure Time (season 3)|3]] [[Adventure Time (season 4)|4]] [[Adventure Time (season 5)|5]] [[Adventure Time (season 6)|6]] [[Adventure Time (season 7)|7]] [[Adventure Time (season 8)|8]] [[Adventure Time (season 9)|9]] [[Adventure Time (season 10)|10]] | [[Adventure Time: Distant Lands|Distant Lands]] | [[Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake|Fionna and Cake]] | [[Adventure Time: Side Quests|Side Quests]] | [[Adventure Time: Bubblegum &amp; Marceline|Bubblegum &amp; Marceline]] | [[Adventure Time: Heyo BMO|Heyo BMO]] | [[Adventure Time|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake}}''''' (2023-present) is an adult animated streaming television series and a spin-off of ''[[Adventure Time]]'' produced by [[w:Cartoon Network Studios|Cartoon Network Studios]] and [[w:Frederator Studios|Frederator Studios]].

{{tv-stub}}

==Season 1==
===''Fionna Campbell''===
:'''Marshall Lee''': Hey, so what. That's your prison uniform.
:'''Fionna''': No way I get that deposit back now.
:'''Marshall Lee''': Wait, did you quit your job? That's a power move. ''[eats one of Gary's prototype biscuits]'' Whoa. These are, like, really good. Where are these from?
:'''Fionna''': I didn't quit. I got fired. 
:'''Marshall Lee''': Wah, wah.
:'''Fionna''': Oh! Marshall, could you let your mom know my rent is gonna be late this month?
:'''Marshall Lee''': Uhhh, me and her aren't really... talking right now.
:'''Fionna''': What?! But I can barely afford the vet! 
:'''Marshall Lee''': Nope! Not gonna do it.
:'''Fionna''': Marshall!
:''[Cake meows]''
:'''Marshall Lee''': But you know what though? Vets are like a total scam. My buddy Ellis can fix her up and he'd only charge you like ''[holds the bag]'' a couple of these.
:'''Fionna''': Sounds kinda shady.
:'''Marshall Lee''': Nooo. He's... he's... He's super legit.
:''[Cake meows again]''
:'''Fionna''': Okay. What's his address?

===''Simon Petrikov''===
:'''Simon''': Sometimes, I used to dress up like Ice King, after I became me again. I guess I... missed being him, in a way. Things felt simpler, in a way, I... I was too out-of-it to understand how screwed up my life was. Eh, but even that stopped working after a while.
:'''Finn''': Have you talked to Marcy about any of this?
:'''Simon''': Nah, I... I didn't wanna freak her out.
:'''Finn''': Well, hey! There's always tomorrow, right?
:'''Simon''': You don't understand; it's all the same for me! Every day is just an unending slog towards... towards... what?

===''Cake the Cat''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Prismo the Wishmaster''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Destiny''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Winter King''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Star''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Jerry''===
:'''Simon''': BMO chose to make the ultimate sacrifice for people he barely knew. It didn't work, but that made it no less noble. Farewell, you little miracle.

===''Casper and Nova''===
:'''Jerry''': Great Embodiment of Chaos... Hear me! For ages untold, I studied your ways, devoting my existence to you. I strove to be your vassal on the physical plane! To build mountains of bodies in your honor! To extinguish all life! And in my universe, this I achieved! But it gave me no satisfaction. In succeeding, I lost all purpose.
:'''Simon''': I know what you me--
:'''Jerry''': Why?! Why must this be?! Hear me, Golb!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Simon''': Betty? Are you in there, even a little? I finally get to you when I'm not even trying... I... I've wanted to see you again for so long...
:'''Jerry''': No, no, no! ''Answer me!'' What more could I have done?! What do you want from me now?!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Simon''': But wait. This... isn't how it happened.
:'''Betty''': No. We made our choices. We could've made better ones, but... I don't have any regrets. You were a wonderful experience!
:'''Simon''': You were... everything.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Scarab''': I'm a professional. And professionals don't hold grudges.

===''Cheers''===
:'''Marshall Lee''': I'll stop him! With music.
:'''Gary''': Your song about tumbleweeds?
:'''Marshall Lee''': No! A new, heartfelt song inspired by our love!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fionna''': If we die, we'll die together. As ourselves.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fionna''': Cake!
:'''Cake''': What?
:'''Fionna''': This is my top fantasy!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Scarab''': You think you've ''won'' something? Ha! You were living in this fake bubble where nothing happens, but now you get all the bad stuff, too! Your worlds to screw up!
:'''Cake''': That just sounds like we're real to me.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Prismo''': Maybe you can even grant a wish in a couple hundred years! But you gotta pay your dues first.
:'''Scarab''': Only people who never pay their dues say that...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Simon''': I'm feeling like this whole experience with Fionna and Cake helped me realize that my life is worthwhile. I'm worried I'll forget that.
:'''Minerva''': This will be a cycle of learning and forgetting and relearning and forgetting again...

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Fionna''': Huh. Just a normal world...

==Season 2==
===''The Hare and the Sprout''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Crocodile Who Bit a Log''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Lion of Embers''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Cat Who Tipped the Box''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Butterfly and the River''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Bird in the Clock''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Wolves Who Wandered''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Insect That Sang''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Worm and His Orchard''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''The Bear and the Rose''===
{{Section-stub}}

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:Max shows]]
[[Category:HBO Max shows]]
[[Category:2020s American animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Traditionally adult animated TV shows]]
[[Category:American adult animated TV spin-offs]]
[[Category:American adult animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:American adult animated action TV shows]]
[[Category:American adult animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:American adult animated fantasy TV shows]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated TV shows]]
[[Category:Television series by Cartoon Network Studios]]
[[Category:Animated TV shows about cats]]
[[Category:Adventure Time]]
[[Category:Current shows]]</text>
      <sha1>8q0vi0vhp0afajmazgg8wahyulpxzzr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>User:Sandi74645/sandbox</title>
    <ns>2</ns>
    <id>261271</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965026</id>
      <parentid>3963578</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:38:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* J */</comment>
      <origin>3965026</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17281" sha1="e02qh6kidurdwazjt9xngwbngb7xh97" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Lemur Island'' | bflix.se
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies''|watch.cinewave.qzz.io, 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'''broodingmovies.com, 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' '''theflixer.sx''', ww4.seeflix.to, '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; azmovies.net, '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>e02qh6kidurdwazjt9xngwbngb7xh97</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965027</id>
      <parentid>3965026</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:38:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* L */</comment>
      <origin>3965027</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17298" sha1="q7fc8xzl8nsdttv5svywwmu234oq75f" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Lemur Island'' | '''bflix.se'''
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies'''''watch.cinewave.qzz.io,''' 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'''broodingmovies.com, 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' '''theflixer.sx''', ww4.seeflix.to, '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; azmovies.net, '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>q7fc8xzl8nsdttv5svywwmu234oq75f</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965029</id>
      <parentid>3965027</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:43:26Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* O */</comment>
      <origin>3965029</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17317" sha1="frhb9254zhfcytbyk3unvnc2zoes6nl" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Lemur Island'' | '''bflix.se'''
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies'''''watch.cinewave.qzz.io,''' 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'', '''broodingmovies.com''', 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' '''theflixer.sx''', ww4.seeflix.to, '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; azmovies.net, '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>frhb9254zhfcytbyk3unvnc2zoes6nl</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965043</id>
      <parentid>3965029</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:28:13Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* W */</comment>
      <origin>3965043</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17329" sha1="a65q6t1tbpz0pkxa96mc3akejc3r1nz" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Lemur Island'' | '''bflix.se'''
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies'''''watch.cinewave.qzz.io,''' 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'', '''broodingmovies.com''', 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' ''''''theflixer.sx''', ww4.seeflix.to, '''broodingmovies.com''''''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; '''azmovies.net, '''ww4.seeflix.to''''''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>a65q6t1tbpz0pkxa96mc3akejc3r1nz</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965044</id>
      <parentid>3965043</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:28:50Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* W */</comment>
      <origin>3965044</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17335" sha1="74b4h1eoxk54a76jpg6e7dve5lx74he" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Lemur Island'' | '''bflix.se'''
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies'''''watch.cinewave.qzz.io,''' 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'', '''broodingmovies.com''', 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' ''''''theflixer.sx''', '''ww4.seeflix.to,''' '''broodingmovies.com''''''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; '''azmovies.net, '''ww4.seeflix.to''''''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>74b4h1eoxk54a76jpg6e7dve5lx74he</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965058</id>
      <parentid>3965044</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:34:15Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* W */</comment>
      <origin>3965058</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17312" sha1="e0ijzt6rwjvxdkur9nuh0gho9jwte9b" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Lemur Island'' | '''bflix.se'''
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies'''''watch.cinewave.qzz.io,''' 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'', '''broodingmovies.com''', 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' ''''''theflixer.sx''', '''ww4.seeflix.to,''' '''broodingmovies.com''''''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; '''azmovies.net, 
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>e0ijzt6rwjvxdkur9nuh0gho9jwte9b</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965060</id>
      <parentid>3965058</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:35:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Sandi74645</username>
        <id>3160827</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>/* Y */</comment>
      <origin>3965060</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="17324" sha1="n5bbm5xk5nwv4ma9evwurwrzx5z6z9t" xml:space="preserve">'''&lt;big&gt;Former Programming&lt;/big&gt;''' 
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}         
'''&lt;big&gt;A&lt;/big&gt;'''                     
* ''A Penguin's Life'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Hunters'' ✓  
* ''Africa's Lost Eden'' 
* ''Africa's Wild West'' ✓
* ''Amazon Underworld'' ✓ 
* ''Africa's Super Snake 
* ''America the Beautiful'' ✓
* ''Alaska's Grizzly Gauntlet'' ✓ 
* ''Animals, They're Just Like Us!'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Boss Croc'' ✓
* ''Bumblebees (youtube)
* ''Born In Africa'' ✓
* ''Baboon Queen'' 
* ''Birth of A Pride'' ✓
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' ✓ 
* ''Behind Russia's Frozen Curtain'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}} 
* ''Cub Camp'' ✓
* ''Cobra Mafia'' ✓
* ''Cat Attack-tics'' ✓
* ''Croc Labyrinth'' 
* ''China's Wild Side''
* ''Cheetah Fatal Instinct&quot; (youtube)
* ''Clash of The Tigers'' (abc.com)
* ''Cat Wars: Lions Vs Cheetah'' (youtube)   
* ''Caribbean's Deadly Underworld | '''xtubeflix.com'', en.ytstv.bz
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}   
* ''Dino Fish''
* ''Dino Bird '''(movies2watch.biz,123movie.work,streamm4u.vip,en.ytstv.bz, )'''                                                               
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Deep Sea Killers'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Emperors of The Ice
* ''Extraordinary Birder with Christian Cooper'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Future Cat'' ✓
* ''Florida Untamed'' ✓
* ''Fur Seals: Battle For Survival'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Game of Lions'' ✓
* ''Grizzly Cauldron'' ✓  
* ''Gangster Jackals '''www.cineby.at,''' 
* ''Great Barrier Reef'' '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Giraffe: African Giant'' ✓
* ''Galapagos: Enchanted Islands'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hippo Vs Croc'' ✓ 
* ''Hunt for The Shadow Cat
* ''Hunt for The Giant Squid'' ✓ 
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Okavango'' ✓ 
* ''Into The Pride Lands'' ✓
* ''India's Wild Leopards'' ✓ 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Waterways'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Jaguar vs Croc'' ✓
* ''Jade Eyed Leopard'' ✓
* ''Jaguar Beach Battle'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Shew'' ✓
* ''Kiler Queen'' ✓
* ''Kangaroo Kaos (has episodes)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Lion Kingdom'' '''123movies123.quest''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Lemur Island'' | '''bflix.se'''
* ''Lion Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Lion Ganglands'' ✓
* ''Lion Battle Zone'' ✓
* ''Leopard Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Leopard Huntress'' ✓
* ''Land of 10,000 Grizzlies'''''watch.cinewave.qzz.io,''' 
* ''Leopards of Dead Tree Island'' ✓
* ''Leopard: Ultimate Survivor'' | 
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man Vs Lion'' ✓
* ''Man vs Puma ✓
* ''Man vs Monster''
* ''Mexico Untamed'' ✓
* ''Man vs Cheetah'' ✓
* ''Moster Croc Hunt'' ✓
* ''Mystery of the giant Cave Spider'' (saved/non english)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Town'' (Saved &quot;No English&quot;)
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Penguinpalooza'' 
* ''Paradise Islands'' ✓
* ''Praire Dog Manor'' ✓
* ''Path of The Pather'' ✓
* ''Planet of the Birds'' ✓
* ''Predator In Paradise'' 
* ''Peru's Wild Kingdom'' (saved)
* ''Pristine Seas: The Power of Protection ✓
* ''Puma!: Elusive Hunter of the Andes'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rebal Monkeys''
* ''Real Angry Birds''
* ''Return of The Clouded Leopard
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Super Cat'' ✓
* ''Swam Lions '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Super Pride '''sflix.hair'''
* ''South Africa'' 
* ''Super Squirrel''
* ''Surpet's Surprise'' ✓
* ''Strangest Bird Alive''  
* ''Secret Life of Pearls''  
* ''Secret Life of Tigers''
* ''Secrets of Wild India'' '''movieseq.com, sflix.hair''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Secrets of the King Cobra'' ✓
* ''Saving Giraffes: The Long Journey Home'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile'' 
* ''Tiger Wars'' ✓
* ''Tiger's Revenge''
* ''The Jungle King'' 
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''Tree Climbing Lions ✓
* ''The Forbidden River''
* ''The Unlikely Leopard'' ✓
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf ✓
* ''The Way of the Cheetah'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas''
* ''Ultimate Honey Badger'' 
* ''Ultimate Rivals: Cats vs Dogs'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild 24'' (saved) 
* ''Wild Artic ✓
* ''Wild Chile''  
* ''Wild Egypt'' ✓
* ''Wild Korea'' ✓
* ''Wild Hawaii'' ✓
* ''Wild Nordic'' ✓
* ''Wild Borneo''
* ''Wolf vs Bear ✓ 
* ''Wild Vietnam''  ✓
* ''Wild Monsoon'' '''(ihavenotv.com)'''
* ''Wild Thailand'' (saved)
* ''War Elephants'' 
* ''Wild Indonesia'' ✓
* ''Wild Sir Lanka'' ✓
* ''Wild Argentina'' '''(moviemoza.com, movies2watch.biz, ihavenotv.com,123movie.work,123moviewe.com,broodingmovies.com )'''
* ''Wild Mississippi'' (has episodes)
* ''War of The Lions'' 
* ''Wild Yellowstone'' ✓
* ''Wild New Zealand'' 
* ''Wild Cats Of India'' ✓
* ''Whales of the Deep
* ''Wild Untamed Brazil '''sflix.hair'''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Yellowstone Wolves: Succession ✓
{{Col-end}}


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'''National Geographic Animal Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Real Bug's Life'' ✓
* ''A Real Bug's Life II'' ✓
* ''Attack of the Killer Bees''
* ''America's National Parks'' ✓
* ''Animal's They're Just Like US!'' ✓
* ''Animals up close with Bertie Gregory'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Bear Island '''sflix.hair'''
* ''Bumblebees ✓
* ''Born in Africa'' 
* ''Battle For Elephants''
* ''Big Sur: Wild California'' uflix.to, streamm4u.vip, broodingmovies.com, 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Chimps on The Edge
* ''Cheetahs Up Close with Berite Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dead By Dawn'' ✓
* ''Devils of The Deep: The Giant Squad
* ''Dolphins Up Close with Bertie Gregory ✓
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Eye of The Leopard ✓
* ''Equators wild secrets (has episodes)
* ''Expedition Great White'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ghost Elephants ✓
* ''Great Migration's'' ✓
* ''Gabon: The Last Eden''
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '''123movies123.ques''', streamm4u.vip
* ''Into The Pride Lands ✓
* ''In Search of The Jaguar 
* ''Incredible Animal Journeys'' ✓
* ''Inside The Enchanted Forests'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kangaroo Kaos
* ''Kingdom Of The Apes 
* ''Kingdom of The Blue Whale '''themoviebox.org,''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Kingdom of The Polar Bear'' ✓
* ''Kingdom of The White Wolf'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giant'' ✓
* ''Last Stand of The Great Bear
* ''Last of The Giants: Wild Fish'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Meet The Chimps'' ✓
* ''Moose: Titans of the North''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''National Parks: USA'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Path of The Panther'' ✓
* ''Panda's The Journey Home (123movieslive.top, streamm4u.vip)
{{Col-end}}

===Q===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Queens'' ✓
* ''Ocean With David Attenborough'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''She Wolf'' ✓
* ''Squid vs Whale''
* ''Savage Kingdom'' ✓
* ''Sharks Reef Rivals ✓
* ''Secrets of The Bees ✓
* ''Secrets of The Whales'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓ 
* ''Secrets of The Penguins'' ✓
* ''Secrets of The Elephants'' ✓
* ''Shark Movers Deadly Cargo'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Flood'' ✓
* ''The Kangaroo King'' ✓
* ''The Unlikely Leopard  ✓
* ''The Secrets of The Octopus'' ✓
* ''The Last Rhinos: A New Hope ✓
* ''The Hidden Kingdoms of China'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===U===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Untamed Americas'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Japan'' 
* ''Whales in Crisis''
* ''Winged seduction birds of paradise '''braflix.bz, sflix.hair, streamm4u.vip'''
* ''Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone''
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Yellowstone Wolf Dynasty''
{{Col-end}}

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''BBC America/BBC Earth Programming'''

===A===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Africa'' ✓
* ''A Perfect Planet'' '''123movies123.quest''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Africa's Wild Year'' ✓
* ''Asia: Bonus Edition  
* ''A Wild Year On Earth'' ✓
* ''Attenborough and the Giant Elephant'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Blue Planet'' ✓
* ''Blue Planet II'' ✓
* ''Big Cats 24/7'' ✓
* ''Big Cat 24/7  ||
* ''Big Bear Diary'' ✓
* ''Big Little Journeys'' |'''braflix.bz'''
* ''Bears: Spy In The Woods | 
{{Col-end}}

===C===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''China: Nature Ancient Kingdom'' (flixhq)
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dynasties''  ✓
* ''Deep Blue'' ✓
* ''Dynasties II'' 
* ''Dogs In The Wild: Meet The Family'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''David Attenborough: A Life on our Planet'' ✓
* ''David Attenborough: Life In Cold Blood 
* ''David Attenborough:  Conquest of the Skies 
* ''Deep Ocean: The Lost World Of The Pacific'' (Saved)
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Earth Flight'' '''ihavenotv?,hd-feemovie.com , azmovies.net'''
* ''Expedition Wolf'' (check)
* ''Enchanted Kingdom'' (Idris Elba) '''ww5.tinyzone.org''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Earth's Great Rivers'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth's Great Seasons'' ✓
* ''Earth's Great Rivers II'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Earth Tropical Islands'' 
* ''Eden: Untamed Planet'' '''ihavenotv, themoviebox.org,'''. 
{{Col-end}}

===F===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Frozen Planet'' ✓
* ''Frozen Planet II'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Galapagos''  '''movies24free.com''''''
* ''Great Barrier Reef '''azmovies.net,''' 
* ''Gorilla Family and Me''
* ''Grizzy Bear Cubs and Me 
{{Col-end}}

===H===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Hostile Planet'' ✓
* ''Hidden Habitats'' (theflixer.sx)
{{Col-end}}

===J===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Japan: Earth's Enchanted Islands, '''azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to, broodingmovies.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Kingdom (123movies9.surf)
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Life'' ✓
* ''Life Story'' ✓
* ''Life In Color'' ✓
* ''Little Big Cat''
* ''Life in Cold Blood'' (ihavenotv.com)
* ''London's Wild Side'' 
* ''Lands Of The Monsoon''
* ''Lions: Spy In The Den''
* ''Life In The Undergrowth'' azmovies.net, broodingmovies.com
* ''Lost land of The Tiger'' (ihavenotv.com)
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Mammals'' ✓
* ''Mirco Monsters'' (ihavenotv, azmovies.net, ww5.tinyzone.org)
* ''Madagascar'' (David Attenborugh) '''hdtodayz.to''', '''ww4.seeflix.to'''
* ''Mountains: Life Above the Clouds''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Nature's Great Events'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''One Life'' '''themoviebox.org''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Our Planet'' '''broodingmovies.com
* ''Ocean Giants'' '''ihavenotv.com'', '''broodingmovies.com''', 
* ''Our Planet II'' ✓
* ''Operation Snow Tiger'' '''theflixer.sx,''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Operation Dung Beetle''
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Planet Earth'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth II'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth III''  ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Asia'' ✓
* ''Planet Earth: Africa''
* ''Polar Bear: Spy On The Ice''  '''solarmoviesz.com'''
* ''Penguins: Spy In The Huddle '''allmovieshub.express,123movies123.quest, broodingmovies.com '''
* ''Planet Earth: South Pacific'' 
* ''Planet Earth: The Blue Planet II'' 
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Reindeer Family and Me'' '''solarmoviesz.com'''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Shark'' (azmovies.net)
* ''Serengeti'' ✓
* ''Serengeti II'' ✓
* ''Serengeti III'' ✓
* ''Spy In The Ocean  (123movieslive.top )
* ''Spy In The Wild'' ✓
* ''Secrets of Wild India '''streamm4u.vip''', 
* ''South Pacific'' (has episodes) '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Seven Worlds, One Planet'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Hunt'' ✓
* ''Tiny Giants'' '''ww8.watchseriesfree.co'''
* ''Tiger Island''
* ''The Wild Place'' 
* ''The Wild Sides'' ✓
* ''The Blue Planet'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''The Rise of Black Wolf''✓
* ''The Cheetah Family &amp; Me ''
* ''The Great Bear Steak Out''
* ''The Polar Bear Family &amp; Me'' '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Tiger Spy In The Jungle'' (David Attenbourgh) azmovies.net, themoviebox.org. ww4.seeflix.to
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Spring 
* ''Wild China'' 
* ''Wild Alaska''
* ''Wild Tokyo'' (streamm4u.vip)
* ''Wild Arabia'' ✓
* ''Wild Singapore ''
* ''Wild Indonesia''
* ''Wild Patagonia'' ✓
* ''Wild Caribbean'' (pluto tv?)
* ''Wild New Zealand ''
* ''Wild City: Singapore ''
* ''Wild West: America's Great Frontier  ✓
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone'' '''ww4.seeflix.to''', 
{{Col-end}}
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
'''Animal Planet'''

===A===  
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''A Panda is Born''
* ''A Panda's Story''
* ''Animal Battlegrounds'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===B===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* '' Big Cat Tales'' ✓
* '' Big Cats: Secret Lives''
* '' Britain's Wildest Places'' ✓
* '' Battle Ground: Rhino Wars'' 
* '' Big Cat Tales: More From The Mara Region''
{{Col-end}}

===D===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Dolphin Days'' ✓
* ''Dark Days In Monkey City''
{{Col-end}}

===E===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Escape To Chimp Eden'' 
{{Col-end}}

===G===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Going Ape'' ✓
* ''Gorilla School'' ✓
* ''Gorillas on the Brink: Saving a Species''
* ''Growing up Animal Series: '' '''streamm4u.vip'''
* ''- Grizzly''
* ''- Lion''
* ''- Tiger ''
* ''- Cheetah ''
* ''- Marsupia''
* ''- Elephant''
* ''- Wolf''
* ''- Clouded Leopard''
* ''- Zebra''
* ''- Baboon''
* ''- Black Bear''
* ''- Orangutan''
* ''- Rhino''
* ''- Lynx''
* ''- Polar Bear''
* ''- Penguin''
* ''- Giraffe''
* ''- Walrus''
* ''- Hyena''
* ''- Camel''
* ''- Moose''
* ''- Leopard''
* ''- Sitka Deer''
* ''- Gorilla''
* ''- Giant Panda''
{{Col-end}}

===I===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Into The Pride '' '''123movies123.quest, streamm4u.vip,''' 
{{Col-end}}

===K===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Killer Whales: The Mega Hunt'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===L===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Little Giants'' ✓
* ''Lemur Kingdom''
* ''League of Monkey's''
* ''Living With Man-Eaters'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===M===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Man vs Bear'' ✓
* ''Meerkat Manor '''www.azmovies.net, ww4.seeflix.to''', '''broodingmovies.com'''
* ''Mounted Branch'' ✓
* ''Man-Eating Super Croc''
* ''Man-Eating Super Squid''
* ''Mysterious Wilds Of India'' 
* ''Mysterious Creatures With Forrest Galante'' ✓
* ''Meet the Pandas: Washington's New Power Couple''
{{Col-end}}

===N===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Night'' (Discovery+)
{{Col-end}}

===O===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Otter Dynasty'' ✓
* ''Orangutan Island''| ww8.watchseriesfree.com
{{Col-end}}

===P===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Project Grizzly'' ✓
* ''Pandamonium'' ✓
* ''Panda Republic'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===R===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Rise of The Warrior Apes'' '''streamm4u.vip''', broodingmovies.com
* ''Romeo &amp; Juliet: A Monkey's Tale''
{{Col-end}}

===S===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Season of The Grizzly''
* ''Saving Grace: The Otter'' ✓
* ''Safari: An Extraordinary Adventure''
* ''Saving The Gorillas: Ellen's Next Adventure'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

===T===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''The Nile''
* ''The Pack'' ✓
* ''Toucan Nation''
* ''The Real Lion Queen'' (saved)
* ''The Great Shark Chase'' 
* ''The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Hart
* ''The Magic Of The Big Blue: Seven Continents'' 
{{Col-end}}

===W===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Wild Deep''
* ''Wild Russia'' ✓
* ''Wild Costa Rica'' (solarmoviesz.com, 
* ''Wild New Zealand''
* ''Wolves and Warriors'' ✓
* ''Walking With Elephants'' ✓
* ''Wild Africa: Rivers Of Life'' ''''''theflixer.sx''', '''ww4.seeflix.to,''' '''broodingmovies.com''''''
* ''Wildest Islands of Indonesia&quot; '''azmovies.net, 
{{Col-end}}

===Y===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Yellowstone Journals'' '''theflixer.sx''', broodingmovies.com, cine97.com
{{Col-end}}

===Z===
{{Col-begin}}
{{Col-2}}
* ''Zolton: The Wolfman'' ✓
{{Col-end}}

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________</text>
      <sha1>n5bbm5xk5nwv4ma9evwurwrzx5z6z9t</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sasha Pieterse</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>265244</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964842</id>
      <parentid>3908018</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:27:11Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Staryu</username>
        <id>3148445</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>Grammar</comment>
      <origin>3964842</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2766" sha1="adwn6nj6zw7oxjp8holutbus1kgz7hh" xml:space="preserve">{{people-cleanup}}
'''[[w:Sasha Pieterse|Sasha Pieterse Sheaffer]]''' (born February 17, 1996) is a South African actress and singer.

== Quotes ==

* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;You get into that position and you don't want to get your hopes up because everything is so fickle in the industry.&quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;I think it's a good thing to look back on and understand that you have a power really. You have power in it and to use it wisely and to the best of our abilities too. Do good rather than bad. &quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;Society expects you to act a certain way and she didn't, which had its consequences.&quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;It's one of those things where — and this is why writers are so successful — it's about humanizing people. &quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;Some of the biggest monsters out there have something in their past that's made them into what they are.I don't think someone is just born into the world being nasty. Usually it's a combination of things. But it's interesting how it affects their life, how it affects everybody else in their life.&quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;Teenage bullying in general, I don't even want to say teenage anymore because everyone deals with some sort of bullying, it never ends. That's such a misconception, but bullying in general is so awful. Whether it's online or it's in person or it's your family.&quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview The biggest thing is to protect yourself emotionally and mentally, which should be a daily practice anyway.&quot;]
* [https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview &quot;As far as advice goes, I would definitely say keep your circle small and close. There really is something to making sure that you have a good support group.&quot;]
** BY P. CLAIRE DODSON, JULY 28, 2022 ,  JULY 28,. https://www.teenvogue.com/story/pretty-little-liars-star-sasha-pieterse-original-sin-emison-interview 2022
**

[[Category:Actresses from South Africa]]
[[Category:1996 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:People from Johannesburg]]
[[Category:Immigrants to the United States]]
[[Category:Women born in the 1990s]]
[[Category:Women singers from the United States]]</text>
      <sha1>adwn6nj6zw7oxjp8holutbus1kgz7hh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Molara Wood</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>265536</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964874</id>
      <parentid>3911150</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:02:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ojewuyib</username>
        <id>3173331</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */ #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964874</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2260" sha1="6mmoidbh43gk04o71v6wetwrshz6f09" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Molara Wood|Molara Wood]]''' (born 1967) is a Nigerian creative writer, journalist and critic. She has been described as one of the eminent voices in the Arts in [[Nigeria]]. Her short stories, flash fiction, poetry and essays have appeared in numerous publications. 
== Quotes ==  
* There is not enough variety to cater to the sheer range, kaleidoscope &amp; palette of human experience and feeling. No sense of what music is in appropriate for certain settings.
** [https://independent.ng/current-nigerian-music-has-no-appeal-molara-wood/ Molara on Nigerian Music in 2022.] 
* It’s a relatively new platform offered by technology for us to continue to express ourselves; for us to continue to reach out to others and to facilitate conversation. And so, we have to embrace it. It’s the way the world is going. We have to embrace it.
** [https://tribuneonlineng.com/why-im-adopting-podcast-as-story-telling-medium-molara-wood/ Molara spoke on podcast as a new technology for the people in 2020.] 
* When it’s your goal to bring more people into the life that the art can spring, what do you do? You have to find other ways of giving expression to that side of yourself.
** [https://tribuneonlineng.com/why-im-adopting-podcast-as-story-telling-medium-molara-wood/ Molara on writing as a form of art in 2020.]  
* We are not short of talents in this country. We are not short of art practitioners who give a lot of thought to what they do.
** [https://tribuneonlineng.com/why-im-adopting-podcast-as-story-telling-medium-molara-wood/ Molara on Nigerian talents in 2020.] 
* We have to realize that the time one is giving to writing reviews is time that could be devoted to personal work.
** [https://thelagosreview.ng/molara-wood-in-conversation-with-toni-kan-most-of-my-writing-is-done-at-night/ Molara on writing reviews.] 
* There’s a kind of generosity about pushing the works of other people, even when there is no reward.
** [https://thelagosreview.ng/molara-wood-in-conversation-with-toni-kan-most-of-my-writing-is-done-at-night/ Molara spoke on supporting other people.]

== External links== 
{{wikipedia}} 
{{Commons}}


{{DEFAULTSORT: Wood, Molara}}
[[Category:1967 births]]
[[Category:Women authors from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>6mmoidbh43gk04o71v6wetwrshz6f09</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Abidemi Sanusi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>267462</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965038</id>
      <parentid>3911051</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:51:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added new quotes #Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965038</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1425" sha1="9k0a6gr34cvl2t8s1tm0zjxaj3rb2ke" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Abidemi Sanusi|Abidemi Sanusi]]''' is a Nigerian author.Abidemi Sanusi was born in Lagos, Nigeria. She had her Education in England, and attended Leeds University.
== Quotes ==
*evil thrived when men do nothing. 
**[https://kenyanbooks.wordpress.com/2010/04/07/qa-with-abidemi-sanusi/Abidemi Sanusi'squote]
*There is always hope and a way to eradicate child trafficking in Africa. A wise person once said that evil thrived when men do nothing. As long as we do nothing about child trafficking, it will continue to thrive.
**[https://kenyanbooks.wordpress.com/2010/04/07/qa-with-abidemi-sanusi/]
*African publishing has suffered a great deal in the few decades or so but there is a new generation of publishers such as Wordalive in Kenya and Cassava Republic in Nigeria who are doing amazing work to restore African publishing and put African literature back where it belongs; with the people and accessible to the rest of the world.
**[https://kenyanbooks.wordpress.com/2010/04/07/qa-with-abidemi-sanusi/]
*Eyo was inspired by my time in the field as a human rights worker and also, child trafficking is a real problem in Nigeria. It’s a pandemic and writing Eyo was my way of raising awareness of the issu
**[https://kenyanbooks.wordpress.com/2010/04/07/qa-with-abidemi-sanusi/]


== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Sanusi, Abidemi}}
[[Category: living people]]
[[Category:Women authors from Nigeria]]</text>
      <sha1>9k0a6gr34cvl2t8s1tm0zjxaj3rb2ke</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>¡Mucha Lucha!</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>269770</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965076</id>
      <parentid>3951322</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:53:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965076</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="34170" sha1="jxhbm11prgj3cj6n6xctz67a3luoonh" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:¡Mucha Lucha!|¡Mucha Lucha!]]''''' (2002-2005) is an American animated television series created by Eddie Mort and Lili Chin. The series focuses on three young masked wrestlers named &quot;Rikochet&quot;, &quot;Buena Girl&quot; and &quot;the Flea&quot;.

==''Season 1''==
===''Back to School'' [1.01a] ===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows the only thing to fear is fear itself. Oh, and bullies.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Flea''': ''Que paso,'' Rikochet. Long time, no see.
:'''Rikochet''': Flea, how many times have I told you to stay out of my garbage? Now come on, we're gonna be late for school.

===''Weight Gaining [1.01b]''===
:'''Buena Girl''': Look out, Rikochet, they're using logic against you.
:'''The Flea''': Logic?! No! No, no! Anything but that! Logic gives The Flea brain pain!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': Hmm. Rikochet, you're only a dishonorable 300 pounds instead of 650! You should be ashamed! All our hard work for ''nada.''
:'''The Flea''': Wait, The Flea has the answer. The Flea's parents are having an all-you-can-eat buffet at The Flea's family restaurant. Rikochet can eat The Flea's family out of house and hold.
:'''Buena Girl''': Prepare to meet your destiny!

===''How Rikochet Got His Move Back [1.02a]''===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador's signature move cannot be taught. It comes from deep within, like gas.

===''Heart of Lucha'' [1.02b]===
:'''The Flea''': A true luchador knows that good or bad isn't something you are, but a choice you make. Like flour or corn tortilla.

===''Woulda Coulda Hasbeena'' [1.03a]===
:'''Buena Girl''': A true luchador knows that today is the only yesterday of tomorrow, whereas tomorrow is the today of tomorrow.

===''The Anger of Cindy Slam ''[1.03b]===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows that some people are only happy when they're angry, but if being angry makes them happy, won't that make them mad or something?

===''The Fantastic Backpack'' [1.04a]===
:'''The Flea''': A true luchador knows that an enemy is just a friend who… doesn't like you and is mean to you all the time.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': You're late. I had to wait with The Flea.
:'''The Flea''': Yeah?! Well, The Flea had to wait with The Flea, too, and The Flea is not too happy about that, either. It is always the same. The Flea is always there. The Flea wears my clothes. The Flea sleeps in my bed. The Flea thought to get a moment alone, but ''NO!!!'' The Flea is right there, right beside The Flea!

===''The Naked and the Masked'' [1.04b]===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows that it takes much more than a mask to be a masked wrestler. But you really need the mask.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': If anybody sees me without my mask, I'll be kicked out of school! I'll disgrace my friends, my family, the entire tradition of masked wrestling! I can't let that happen! ''[walks up to The Flea's house]'' I need someone who's good enough to be my friend, but low enough to bend the rules. ''[pulls out a bush and hides in it]'' I need the cleanest, dirty wrestler there is. I need The Flea! ''[rings the doorbell]''
:'''The Flea''': ''[dashes over to the front door and opens it]'' The Flea already told you! The Flea family doesn't want any stinkin' cookies!

===''Curse of the Masked Toilet'' [1.05a]=== 
:'''The Flea''': A true luchador knows that having a monster toilet around really stinks.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Mr. Flea''': Why is The Flea playing in the new Flea family toilet?
:'''The Flea''': The Flea is not playing… this time. The toilet is cursed! Cursed, The Flea tells you!
:'''Mrs. Flea''': That's nice, dear Flea.
:'''Mr. Flea''': Uh, Mr. and Mrs. Flea have to go out, now.
:'''Mrs. Flea''': Flea, take care of Pulguita. Oh, and it has been three months. Tonight is shower night!
:'''The Flea''': NO! Anything but that! Not… shower night!

===''The Mummy with the Golden Mask [1.05b]''===
:'''Buena Girl''': A true luchador knows that the greatest victory is making a new friend, even if that friend is ancient monster trying to take over the world.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Headmistress''': The ancient Slamazonian people were an advanced masked wrestling society who disappeared ''thousands'' of years ago.
:'''Luchadores''': ''[amazed]'' Ooh!
:'''Headmistress''': This is the legendary, golden mask of Voladora, the Queen of the Slamazons! She ruled with a beautiful man and a fist of iron… rather like myself. Until she was deposed and unmasked in a title 'bout atop a great pyramid by a beautiful, but headstrong young princess! Rather like myself.
:'''Buena Girl''': The Slamazons? Sweet ''buena!'' My grandmother's part-Slamazonian. She told me all about them. These hieroglyphics say that Queen Voladora's last masked words were a vow of everlasting revenge. Under the greatest peril and the threat of certain doom, the Golden Mask must never be reunited with The Mummy.
:'''The Flea''': Why not, man? It fits like a glove.

===''Bring Your Dad to Lucha Day'' [1.06a]===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows the value of family. No matter where you when you call them, they've got to come pick you up.

===''Our Founder [1.06b]''===
:'''The Flea''': A true luchador always consults The Code of Masked Wrestling, even though the print is small and there are no pictures or nothing.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': ''Compadres,'' look! We stand before the man who founded the school and wrote &quot;The Code of Masked Wrestling.&quot; El Fundador.
:'''Rikochet''': Buena Girl, it's a portrait. It's not gonna help us.
:'''El Fundador''': Hello, there.

===''Tooth or Dare'' [1.07a] ===
:'''Buena Girl''': A true luchador flosses for the honor of good dental hygiene, not for some trophy or plaque. Plaque. Get it?

===''Mask Mitzvah'' [1.07b]===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows that manhood is not about a grande body, but a grande heart. But not so grande, it can't fit into your body.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[Rikochet and Masked Dog are crossing the San Luis Rey bridge]''
:'''Rikochet''': It's just an old bridge. It's no big deal. Besides, today, I'm a man. I'm ready for anything. I'm standing tall! ''[suddenly finds his path blocked by a three-headed beast]'' I… I…
:'''San Luis Rey Monster''': None shall pass! This is ''our'' bridge. And we don't like anyone with only one head crossing it. Except for Masked Dog, of course. He's cool.
:'''Rikochet''': Ooh, I get it. This is all some kind of test. Some part of my masked mitzvah.

===''The Flea's Fighting Fish'' [1.08a]===
:'''The Flea''': A true luchador always offers the hand of friendship even to a stupid fish who can't even shake it.

===''La Flamencita [1.08b]''===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador has on his face: a mask, on his body: a sequin unitard, and on his feet: boogie shoes!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Headmistress''': Nobody move! You, Rikochet. You put La Flamencita's partner out of action! You will fill in as her partner, so that she can defend the honor of her dancing. The purity of her mask. The rustle of her skirt against that cheeky, annoying, bad guy team of The Ballroom Blitzkriegs! Now, have fun, you two. The Headmistress has spoken!
:'''Sr. Hasbeena''': Man, I hate it when she does that. It scares the tights off me. Not cool.
:'''Rikochet''': Uh, La Flamencita, there's a teeny, tiny problem with me dancing as your Lucha partner. ''[chuckles awkwardly]'' I can't dance.

===''Will the Real El Rey Please Stand Up?'' [1.09a]===
:'''El Rey''': A true luchador comes in all shapes and sizes, even made of plastic and with action kung-fu grip!

===''The Musica Man [1.09b]''===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows that music is the hot sauce in the burrito of life. And sometimes, a little can go a long way.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': ''[furiously fed up]'' '''''THAT'S IT!!!''''' ''[to the mariachi band]'' I thought having my own mariachi band would be ''caliente,'' but you got me beaten up, and now you got me detention for a year!

===''Pinball Wizard [1.10a]''===
:'''Rikochet''': ''[bouncing around in his pinball signature move]'' A true luchador rolls with the punches no matter what shapes he's in. But it helps to be, you know, round?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': I got expelled from school, I rolled away from my friends when they needed me the most, I've been kicked around and partially buried. A pinball gets no respect. A pinball gets no love. ''[breaks down, in tears of sorrow]'' A pinball is only a forgotten plaything. I'm useless, completely useless!

===''Not So Buena Girl'' [1.10b]===
:'''Buena Girl''': A true luchador never gives up on anything, especially yourself. And family. And donuts.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': Flea, this is serious. Masked Wrestling is ''everything'' to Buena Girl. We have to help her.
:'''The Flea''': ''No problema.'' One magnetic and outgoing smile from The Flea, and all will be well.

===''Honor Thy Lucha'' [1.11a]===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows that the price you pay for stealing is much higher than the price you pay for, uh, just paying.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': The card doesn't belong to me. But it's the rarest, coolest most ''caliente'' trading card in the history of trading cards, and I gotta have it!
:'''Angel Buena Girl''': Don't do it, Rikochet! A true luchador ''never'' steals. It goes against honor.
:'''Devil Flea''': Ah, just take it. Slip it into your backpack. Minotoro will never miss it.
:'''Angel Buena Girl''': But without honor, a masked wrestler is ''nada!'' Don't do it, Rikcohet.
:'''Devil Flea''': Don't worry. No one will ever know.

===''Chinche'' [1.11b]===
:'''The Flea''': A true luchador must never be two-faced. After all, he's only got one mask! ''[laughs]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': You should be ashamed picking on poor little Chinche like that!
:'''Rikochet''': Flea, he's your cousin. Get it together.

===''Timmy of a Thousand Masks [1.12a]''===
:'''Buena Girl''': A true luchador is always innocent until proven guilty, unless it's The Flea. In which case, there's a good chance that he probably did it.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Headmistress''': Who told you all to come to my office?!
:'''Luchadores''': Sr. Hasbeena.
:'''Sr. Hasbeena''': But-but-but, I didn't! Most uncool.
:'''Headmistress''': You, Sr. Hasbeena, you're expelled!
:'''Mr. Midcarda''': You can't expel him. He's a teacher.
:'''Headmistress''': Questioning my authority? You're expelled!

===''All Creatures Masked and Small'' [1.12b]===
:'''Rikochet''': A true luchador knows that friendship means sometimes you must take your best friend to the vet to be worn.
:'''The Flea''': ''[popping out in the title card]'' No!
:'''Rikochet''': Not you, Flea.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': Masked Dog, you've got fleas, ''[glares at Flea]'' thanks to The Flea. And having fleas is unhealthy. Fleas carry disease, and they're really ugly.

===''Mask-Away [1.13]''===
:'''Rikochet''': ''[emerging from of the water, gasping for air]'' A true luchador is never lost, he's just taking the scenic route.

==''Season 2''==
===''The Man from M.A.S.K.'' [2.01a]===

===''Flea's Bueno Twin'' [2.01b]===
:'''Buena Girl''': Flea, let's go! ''[sighs]'' Keep your friends waiting on the Lucha bus when it's time to go home, it's so not buena. Where is he?!
:'''Rikochet''': Dumpster diving. He saw Skelantonio toss out a bag of half eaten donuts.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Bus Driver''': Hey, no super-natural transformations on the bus, or eating! Out you go.
:''[Rikochet, Buena Girl and Bueno Flea are kicked off the bus and walk down the sidewalk]''
:'''Bueno Flea''': ''Señora'' Bus Driver is quite right. The Flea scoffed once too often at her regulations and rules. Yet, they are ''muy importante.''

===''Nightmare on Lucha Street'' [2.02a]===

===''Revenge of the Masked Toilet'' [2.02b]===
:'''Rikochet''': Buena Girl, you're not supposed to be in here! This is the boys' room.
:'''Buena Girl''': What difference does that make?
:'''Rikochet''': Hello, weren't you in health class?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': Hey, what's the lineup for?
:'''Protozoa''': For saving the honor of the school. The Masked Toilet is undefeated. Someone has to beat it!
:'''The Flea''': It is just like I told you! The Masked Toilet is back and he wants ''REVENGE!''
:'''Buena Girl''': Come on, Flea, you have to learn to face your fears.
:'''Rikochet''': That's right, Flea. All true luchadors know that the key to victory is inside yourself.

===''Calling All Monsters'' [2.03a]===
:'''The Flea''': The Flea sees many gaping holes in El Gundamo's poorly planned plan.
:'''Rikochet''': Come on! We have to work together!
:'''The Flea''': ''[jumping into action]'' The Fabulous Flea Fling! ''[leaps onto the giant sushi monsters and farts on them]''
:'''Rikochet''': Looks like giant sushi monsters have natural defenses against The Flea's natural stenches. ''[he and Buena Girl jump into action]''
:'''Buena Girl''': Buena Gavel of Righteousness!
:'''Rikochet''': Spinning Top!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': Whoa, King Prawn's got game.

===''Pig Out [2.03b]''===
:'''Rikochet''': '''''MAMA!!!''''' Have you seen my El Rey mask buffer? ''[Mama Manaica walks over to the counter to wash the coffee off her face with a towel]'' Mama, have you seen my mini Lucha Dome with 323 movable parts?
:'''Mama Manaica''': When was the ''last'' time you cleaned your room?
:'''Rikochet''': ''[trying to remember]'' Clean my room. Uh, I think, uh… May, July, October… this morning! ''[sweating anxiously]'' Yeah, that's it. Uh… this morning.
:'''Mama Manaica''': Rikochet, you cannot find anything in your room, because it looks a P-I-G, '''''pig''''' is living in there.
:'''Rikochet''': But, mama, my room is so neat…
:'''Mama Manaica''': So show me.
:'''Rikochet''': Uh… You don't need to see it. You're far too busy. Well, time to go. ''[tries to leave]''
:'''Mama Manaica''': ''[stopping him]'' Rikochet! I am never too busy for my family.
:'''Rikochet''': Uh, well, I guess you're not. Ooh, I think I hear ''abuelito'' calling.
:'''Mama Manaica''': Your ''abuelito'' is out shopping for a guitar.
:'''Rikochet''': What about papa?
:'''Mama Manaica''': On tour.
:'''Rikochet''': Masked Dog?
:'''Mama Manaica''': Fed.
:'''Rikochet''': The kitchen?
:'''Mama Manaica''': Clean… Unlike your room!
:'''Rikochet''': Well, I guess you don't have anything better to do. ''[leads his mother to his room as they leave the kitchen]'' (Trust me.) You'll see. ''[chuckles nervously]'' My room is all sparkly and clean.
:'''Mama Manaica''': Oh. Heh, heh. It ''better'' be ''muy'' sparkly and clean, or no more El Rey video games for you!
:''[As Rikochet and his mama walk towards his room, he hesitantly opens the door and junk flies out everywhere, and all around the house]''
:'''Mama Manaica''': ''[off-screen]'' Rikochet?
:'''Rikochet''': ''[off-screen; nervously]'' Yes, mama?
:'''Mama Manaica''': ''[shouting angrily]'' '''''CLEAN YOUR ROOM!!!'''''

===''Lone Stars'' [2.04a]===
:'''Rikochet''': What are you doing?!
:'''The Flea''': The Flea is making the best of a good situation, for your own good. Someday, you'll be as famous as your ''papa.'' Today, you'll find out what to expect.
:'''Buena Girl''': Flea, don't you think it'd be better if Rikochet ''earned'' this adulation on his own through practice, dedication, and hard work?
:'''The Flea''': What good is practice, dedication, and hard work that's for fame, fortune, and food, huh?

===''The Littlest Luchadora [2.04b]''===
:''[Nighttime at The Flea's house… The Flea family are eating dinner at the dining table as Flea glares at Pulguita in jealousy]''
:'''Mrs. Flea''': Mrs. Flea ran into Sr. Hasbeena at the market, and he told Mrs. Flea all about how you trounced Skelantonio in your first match!
:'''Mr. Flea''': Mr. Flea and Mrs. Flea are so proud of their Pulguita, knowing she will carry on the family tradition with honor.
:'''Mrs. Flea''': You can skip your dinner tonight and go straight to Mrs. Flea's famous flan!
:'''The Flea''': But what about The Flea? ''[a scoop of peas are poured onto his plate]'' What is this?! What are these tiny green balls?! They frighten The Flea!
:'''Mrs. Flea''': Those are peas. The Flea must eat vegetables if he wants to grow up big and strong like his ''hermanita.''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''The Flea''': ''[mockingly]'' &quot;Pulguita this and Pulguita that.&quot; Who do you think taught her all those Flea-like moves? The Flea, that's who! Who is she to outshine The Flea?
:'''Rikochet''': She's your sister, that's who.
:'''Buena Girl''': Besides, how can ''she'' outshine you? You're still the big Flea on campus.

===''Thrills and Skills'' [2.05a]===

===''Party Animal [2.05b]''===

===''Dances with Bugs'' [2.06a]===

===''Chain of Fools'' [2.06b]===
:'''The Flea''': ''[while getting shrunk]'' The room, it's getting bigger! ''[falls to the ground, sits up, and looks around, realizing he's been shrunk]'' No! It is The Flea who has gotten smaller!

===''You Look Radishing'' [2.07a]===

===''Lucha, Rinse, and Repeat [2.07b]''===
:'''The Flea''': ''[voiceover through letter] '''&quot;Dear Rikochet and Buena Girl, The Flea and Masked Dog hate baths. We are going to find a place where our filth can be appreciated. Goodbye forever.&quot;'''''
:'''Rikochet''': ''[shocked]'' Oh, no, Buena Girl! Flea and Masked Dog have run away!

===''French Twisted'' [2.08a]===

===''Los Lobos de Lucha'' [2.08b]===

===''War of the Donuts'' [2.09a]===
:'''Buena Girl''': Flea, this is like a dream come true!
:'''The Flea''': Well, falling into a dumpster of chili cheese fries is a dream come true, but The Flea thinks this is pretty great! How's Rikochet doing?
:'''Buena Girl''': It's all buena.
:'''Rikochet''': ''[standing in the middle of the street, wearing a donut costume; uncomfortably dismayed]'' Public relations he called it. ''Ay, basura.''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': Why would they build a donut shop there, when they have a Slammin' Donuts right here?
:'''El Perrito''': Hey, everyone! There's a new donut shop across the street. They're giving away free donuts!

===''Show Me the Funny'' [2.09b]===

===''Getting Ahead'' [2.10a]===
:'''Rikochet''': Say hello to a brand new me!
:'''Buena Girl''': Huh?!
:'''The Flea''': ''[gasps]'' What the…?!
:''[Rikochet is revealed to have his head shrunk]''

===''Los Fabulosos'' [2.10b]===

===''Meet the Muertos'' [2.11a]===

===''Mask Maker'' [2.11b]===

===''Big Buena Sellout'' [2.12a]===
:'''Rikochet''': ''[after Buena Girl turns off the TV]'' Why'd you do that?
:'''Buena Girl''': ''[shaking her head in denial]'' It's just not right.
:'''The Flea''': The Flea agrees. Onion juice should be in a mug.
:'''Buena Girl''': Flea, that's ''not'' what I meant. It's too commercial. It's not what masked wrestling is all about. It's about honor in the ring. It's about us being a tag-team. It's about Lucha Libre! Libre means free, not low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low price.
:'''Rikochet''': I think you left out one &quot;low&quot;.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': ''[coming to her senses when Rikochet tags her]'' What happened to me? Rikochet! ''[gasps]'' My teammate needs me! Have I forgotten the truth? ''[drops an energy bar and steps into the ring]'' The truth is that I stand for honor, family, tradition! I am the Buena Bulldozer of Truth!

===''Laying in Ruins'' [2.12b]===
:'''Buena Girl''': It's really great to see your mom wrestle, Rikochet.
:'''Rikochet''': ''Sí.'' Everybody knows she just stands around in the kitchen, flipping pancakes. But in fact, she's one of the best wrestling moms in all of Masked Wrestling!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Mama Manaica''': ''[applauding]'' Bravo, Rikochet! Bravo!
:'''Rikochet''': Mama?!
:'''Mama Maniaca''': Excellent job.
:'''Rikochet''': Mama! What are you doing here?!
:'''Mama Maniaca''': Maya is my old college roommate.
:'''Maya Moderna''': She told me that you needed help taking (better) care of your things.
:'''Mama Maniaca''': So, we cooked up this little test for you.
:'''Rikochet''': A little test? But what about the ancient warrior?
:'''Maya Moderna''': That's my son.
:'''Mayan Warrior''': 'Sup, yo?
:'''Mama Maniaca''': And you passed the test with flying colors, Rikochet! I'm so proud of you!

===''Undercover Flea'' [2.13a]===
:'''Buena Girl''': That is so not buena! Street Sweeper of Surrender!

===''Kid Wombat [2.13b]''===

===''Churro Overload'' [2.14]===
:'''Headmistress''': Flea! Those churros are for the school fundraiser, not for eating!
:''[Rikochet slaps Flea in the back of his head, making him spit the churro out into the box]''
:'''Buena Girl''': ''[disgusted]'' Eww.
:'''Headmistress''': Each of you little luchadors will have to sell a box churros and turn in the proceeds at this Friday's fund fair to raise money for underprivileged intercity luchadors. Those of you who do not sell your churros, must return them to me, '''''personally, OR ELSE!''''' As for the rest of you, carnival rides and festival fun. ''[all the luchadors cheer]'' Now go and '''''SELL!'''''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': Look at all the money we made for the under-privilege intercity luchadors.
:'''Rikochet''': Lucky for us, no one can resist these sugary fatty snacks.
:'''The Flea''': ''[sniffles sadly]'' Especially The Flea. And now The Flea must leave the country.
:'''Buena Girl''': Didn't you earn ''any'' money?
:'''The Flea''': The belly is full, but the pockets are empty.

===''Mini Mercado of Doom'' [2.14b]===

===''La Bruja'' [2.15a]===

===''El Niño Loco'' [2.15b]===

===''The Collector [2.16]''===

===''The Brat in the Hat'' [2.17a]=== 

===''Election Daze [2.17b]''===
:'''Buena Girl''': Hate to do this to you, Flea!
:'''The Flea''': The Flea hates to do this to you as well!
:'''Tibor''': No, ''we'' hate to do it to ''both'' of you!
:'''Buena Girl &amp; The Flea''': Huh?
:'''Tibor''': We challenge you both, arrrgh!
:'''El Loco Mosquito''': We are taking over the student council in a three-on-two match!

===''Late Night Lucha'' [2.18a]=== 

===''Flea at Last [2.18b]''===
:'''Mr. Midcarda''': ''Uno, dos, tres!'' Protozoa wins!
:'''The Flea''': And The Flea loses.
:'''Headmistress''': This makes ''five'' losses in a row, Flea. One more loss, and you are expelled from the Foremost World-Renowned International School of Lucha! ''Entiende?'' FOREVER!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': You expect me to risk the honor of my family and mask because you keep losing?
:'''The Flea''': Uh-huh.
:'''Rikochet''': Never…gonna…happen.

===''Flea's Personal Demons'' [2.19a]===

===''Virtual Luchadores [2.19b]''===

===''Day of the Piñata'' [2.20a]===
:'''Buena Girl''': Flea, what happened to all the candy? Did you eat all the candy?!

===''Poocha Lucha'' [2.20b]===
:'''Rikochet''': ''[to Heavy Traffic]'' I challenge you to a match! Winner keeps Masked Dog!
:'''Heavy Traffic''': This flea-bitten mutt? You're on, bag-head!
:'''Judge''': ''LUCHARAAAN!!''

===''Run, Lucha, Run'' [2.21a]===
:'''Mama Manaica''': Now, we're only going to be gone for a few hours. So we want you ''niños'' to be good.
:'''Rikochet''': Aw, can't we come, too?
:'''Mama Manaica''': Sorry, ''mijo,'' it's a school night.
:'''Rikochet''': But, mama, the luchador ''fabuloso'' mega-match spectacular only comes once a year.
:'''Buena Girl''': And as the future of Lucha Libre, shouldn't we be able to…
:'''The Flea''': Blow up bedtimes so we can watch cool centering action?
:'''Parents''': No.
:'''Mama Manaica''': And be asleep by 9:00. Goodnight, ''niños.''
:'''Rikochet''': Well, at least we can watch it on T.V.

===''An Epic Tale of Donuts and Heroes [2.21b]''===
:'''Mrs. Flea''': ''[bursts out of the kitchen; frantically]'' Gone! It's all gone! ''[falls to the floor with a faint]''
:'''Mr. Flea''': ''[picks up his wife]'' What's gone? What is Mrs. Flea talking about?
:'''Mrs. Flea''': ''[stuttering]'' Do-do-do-do-do…
:'''Mr. Flea''': ''[shutting his wife's mouth]'' Mr. and Mrs. Flea must get a hold of themselves. There's no need to lose control. Now, what seems to be the trouble, ''mi amor?''
:'''Mrs. Flea''': The well that supplies Mr. and Mrs. Flea with never-ending raw, dough, and batter… has run dry! ''GONE!''
:'''Mr. Flea''': Mr. Flea was afraid this day might come.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''The Flea''': This isn't how it was described! WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE DONUTS?!
:'''Rikochet''': Does that answer your question?

===''Attack of the Luchabots! [2.22]''===

===''I Was a Pre-Teenage Chupacabra'' [2.23a]===
:'''Buena Girl''': Flea, why are you dressed like the chupacabra?
:'''The Flea''': The Flea is not dressed. The Flea's been infected with uncontrollable hair!

===''Carnival of Masked Terror [2.23b]''===
:'''Sra. Loca Gitana''': Something's wrong. I can't see them!
:'''Minotoro''': ''[off-screen]'' Maybe that's because you're looking in the wrong place. ''[pan over to him, Rikochet, Buena Girl, and The Flea facing them]'' I've beaten your son, fairly, but you had to go and try to dishonor me! ''[Hijo Gitano escapes through the window]'' You guys take care of Hop-along. Mommy's mine.
:'''Sra. Loca Gitana''': You made a mistake, common haired boy. Now, you must deal with… Tarot Card of Travesty!

===''My Hairy Knuckles'' [2.24a]===
:'''The Flea''': Always gotta be so buena, don't ya?
:'''Buena Girl''': Well, we proved our point. Besides, it's better that he returned to his own kind.

===''Brains Meets Brawn'' [2.24b]===
:''[Evening at Rikochet's house; All the luchadors are gathered for a secret meeting]''
:'''Rikochet''': Does anyone have any idea of how to get rid of El Maestro Del Mundo?
:'''The Flea''': Just give The Flea five minutes, a barrel, some strong twine, a bent sausage, and a lime-green sweater vest!
:'''Rikochet''': And then what?
:'''The Flea''': Nothing. The Flea is just talking up on supplies.
:'''La Piñata''': He's undefeatable.
:'''Penny''': He just keeps learning, and his just keeps getting bigger!
:'''Rikochet''': Wait a second! I think we can turn that skill against him. We need to challenge him to a rematch.

===''Asphalt of Doom'' [2.25a]===

===''Hot, Hot, Hot [2.25b]''===
:'''Rikochet''': All this stuff needs to be returned!
:'''Igloca''': Freeze right there! Why don't you just ''chill'' instead?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:''[After Zero Kelvin and Pierre defeated Igloca together]''
:'''Pierre De Fuego''': It's over, Igloca.
:'''Zero Kelvin''': We beat you fair and square.
:'''Rikochet''': Now you have to give this stuff back to the sweltering citizens of the city!
:'''Igloca''': Never! If I can't have it, ''no one can! [cackles evilly]''

===''Getting His Goat'' [2.26a]===

===''10 Rounds of Trouble [2.26b]''===

==''Gigante (Season 3)''==
===''Buena Basura'' [3.01a]===

===''Shamrock 'n Roll'' [3.01b]===

===''The Spider and the Flea'' [3.02a]===
:'''Rikochet &amp; Buena Girl''': Get the belt, Flea! Get the belt!
:'''The Flea''': Hiya, teammates. Let's go get us a belt!
:'''El Loco Mosquito''': Not so fast, Flea, I'm going first.
:'''Dragonfly''': No, it's my turn!
:'''Rikochet &amp; Buena Girl''': Get the belt!
:'''El Loco Mosquito''': I believe you are sorely mistaken.
:'''Rikochet &amp; Buena Girl''': Get the belt! Belt, belt, ''BELT!''
:'''The Flea''': It's ''my'' turn!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Headmistress''': If you don't bring back the belt before this clock stops ticking, you three are going… '''''OUT THE LUCHA DOOR!!!'''''
:'''Dragonfly''': Uh, excuse me, ma'am. What does that mean?
:'''Headmistress''': Oh… ''[chuckles]'' That just means you will all be… &lt;big&gt;&lt;big&gt;'''''EXPELLED!!!!!'''''&lt;/big&gt;&lt;/big&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': Headmistress is gonna blow.
:'''Buena Girl''': We better distract her.
:'''Rikochet''': Calm down, Headmistress.
:'''Buena Girl''': There's no reason to be mad.
:'''Rikochet''': There are plenty of things to do in life besides being mad.
:'''Buena Girl''': Like, uh… polishing your mask!
:'''Rikochet''': Go, ''Los Insectos!'' We'll keep her busy until you bring back the belt!
:'''The Flea''': We don't even know where to find this &quot;spider hole.&quot;
:'''El Loco Mosquito''': Yes, but we have to find it, for insect-themed masked wrestlers everywhere!

===''The Incredible Penny Plutonium [3.02b]''===

===''Dare to Lucha'' [3.03a]=== 
:'''Cindy Slam''': Man. That lame show and its lame stunts are so… lame. ''[turns and walks away]'' Lame. ''[turns back]'' I'm not gonna waist time with you guys.
:'''Rikochet''': Why not?
:'''Buena Girl''': I dare you!
:'''Rikochet''': Yeah! I dare you to waist time with us!
:'''Cindy Slam''': I dare ''you'' to shut up! GO AWAY, RIKOCHET! You're just a lightweight loser that could never challenge me to a worthy dare!
:'''Rikochet''': ''[offended]'' Lightweight loser? Oh, yeah, Cindy Slam?! I dare you to wrestle me!
:'''Cindy Slam''': Oh, no! Rikochet challenged me to a match! Oh, whatever shall I do?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': Well, folks, you've just witnessed the great Dare to Lucha, ever!
:'''The Flea''': And it was a match with a valuable lesson: If you work together, you'll never go hungry! ''[gobbles down on some sushi]'' How does victory taste, Rikochet?
:'''Rikochet''': It's very filling. Bring me another 40 pieces.
:'''Cindy Slam''': Oh, is that all? You must have the stomach of a baby chihuahua.
:'''Rikochet''': Oh, yeah?
:'''Cindy Slam''': Yeah!
:'''Rikochet''': I dare you eat 100 pieces!
:'''Cindy Slam''': I dare you to eat 200!
:'''Rikochet''': 300!
:'''Cindy Slam''': 400!

===''Monkey Business [3.03b]''===

===''Dawn of the... Donuts'' [3.04a]===

===''Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of Horchata [3.04b]''===

===''Banditos de los Muertos'' [3.05a]===

===''Field of Screams'' [3.05b]===

===''Medico Mayhem'' [3.06]===

===''Big Worm'' [3.06]===

===''Slamazon and On'' [3.07a]===
:'''Buena Girl''': Whoa! Seriously freaky tiki. I'm glad it's just a statue.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Buena Girl''': Doesn't he know that the match ends with a finishing move? What am I gonna do? I hate being queen! ''[takes off the tiki necklace]'' Stupid tiki.

===''Buena on Wheels'' [3.07b]===
:'''Rikochet''': Flea, Rollerita is really Buena Girl in disguise!
:'''The Flea''': Don't even kid about that.
:'''Rikochet''': No, really, look!

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''The Flea''': Two Buena Girls?
:'''Rikochet''': Two Buena Girls?
:'''Headmistress''': Two Buena Girls?
:'''Buena Girl''': There's only ''one'' Buena Girl.
:'''Rikochet''': Buena Girl! So, you ''have'' been competing at Roller Lucha.
:'''Buena Girl''': I thought trying a new sport would be challenging. But compared with Lucha Libre, Roller Lucha is ''way'' lame.
:'''Rikochet''': ''[relieved]'' For a minute there, I thought we lost you.
:'''Buena Girl''': It may be fast, but it sure isn't Lucha.
:'''Rollerita''': Where do you think you're going? You think you can insult our sport and just leave? Maybe Roller Lucha's too ''mega'' for a Buena Girl like you.
:'''Buena Girl''': &quot;Mega?&quot; Please. With our discipline Lucha Libre training, we could beat you at your own silly sport!
:'''The Flea''': Um, Buena Girl, we can't stake.
:'''Rollerita''': You are so going down.

===''A Whole Lotta El Reys'' [3.08a]===
:'''The Flea''': The Flea's parents only bring in junky store bot toys. NO ONE LOVES THE FLEA! ''[runs out of the house, sobbing]''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Rikochet''': ''[enraged]'' You disgraced me before my friend, you destroyed my favorite chili, AND YOU'RE ''REALLY'' ANNOYING! ''LUCHARAAAN!!!''

===''Doomien'' [3.08b]===
:'''Rikochet''': I can't believe you did that, Buena Girl!
:'''Buena Girl''': Did what?
:'''Rikochet''': Push me out of the way, just so you could get all the credit for the pin!
:'''The Flea''': Ace Video Yearbook Reporter, The Flea here, where Rikochet has just called out Buena Girl.
:'''Buena Girl''': I pushed you ''off,'' because you were too busy showboating to notice that Haystack Grande was lifting his--
:'''Rikochet''': I was ''not'' showboating! I merely relishing it and yet, another victory that I had to do all by myself, with ''no'' help from you!
:'''Buena Girl''': ''[insulted]'' I can't believe you would say that!
:'''Rikochet''': That's not the only thing.
:'''The Flea''': What else?
:'''Buena Girl''': Yeah, Rikochet. What else?
:'''Rikochet''': All I'm saying is that you have to start pulling your weight around here.
:'''The Flea''': Just a recap for our viewers, Rikochet first called Buena Girl, &quot;lazy,&quot; and now he just called her, &quot;fat.&quot;
:'''Buena Girl''': I'M SICK OF ALL THE INSULTS AND ACCUSATIONS! I DON'T NEED IT!
:'''Rikochet''': Well, I don't need you.
:'''Buena Girl''': Well, ''I'' don't need you ''or'' the Buena-Chet All Stars, either!
:'''Rikochet''': Fine!
:'''Buena Girl''': Fine!
:''[They both angrily go their separate ways; Later at the press conference…]''
:'''The Flea''': Here were are, at the tag team press conference, with the now ex-members of the Buena-Chet All Stars.
:'''Buena Girl''': I just wanna say, I don't need you, either.
:'''Rikochet''': Big whoop. I could win this tournament with anyone as my partner.
:'''Buena Girl''': Oh, yeah?!
:'''Rikochet''': Yeah! I could win even with… Snow Pea as my partner!
:'''Buena Girl''': I could win with… ''[looks around]'' Doomien as my partner!
:'''Rikochet''': What?! You mean that pasty little schoolboy nerd?! ''[falls off his chair, laughing hysterically]''

===''The Match Before Xmas [3.09]''===
:'''Rikochet''': Buena Girl! Someone wrecked my house and defeated my papa! And what's even worse, Santo Claus didn't leave me any presents!
:'''Buena Girl''': Santo Claus didn't leave me anything, either. And just look at ''my'' house.
:'''Rikochet''': ''[sadly]'' This is the worst Lucha Christmas ever.
:'''The Flea''': This is the best Lucha Christmas ever!

===''Call of the Mild [3.10]''===

===''Smarticus'' [3.11a]===

===''Niko Sushi's Happy Battle Funtime Dome 3000! [3.11b]''===

===''Mars Madness'' [3.12a]===

===''Fears of a Clown [3.12b]''===

===''The Magnificent Three [3.13]''===

== Voice Cast ==

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Animated adventure TV shows]]
[[Category:Animated comedy TV shows]]
[[Category:Kids' WB shows]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network shows]]</text>
      <sha1>jxhbm11prgj3cj6n6xctz67a3luoonh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Death by burning</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>272085</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965168</id>
      <parentid>3492633</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:31:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>added [[Category:Fire]] using [[Help:Gadget-HotCat|HotCat]]</comment>
      <origin>3965168</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1440" sha1="f676q5981q2a4axomnujzqc64d84pol" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Death by burning|Death by burning]]''' (also known as '''immolation''') is an [[w:list of execution methods|execution]], [[murder]], or [[suicide]] method involving [[combustion]] or exposure to extreme heat. It has a long history as a form of public [[capital punishment]], and many societies have employed it as a punishment for and warning against crimes such as [[treason]], [[heresy]], and [[witchcraft]]. The best-known execution of this type is '''burning at the stake''', where the condemned is bound to a large wooden stake and a fire lit beneath.

{{stub}}

== Quotes==

*This was, at the beginning of the 2000s, the only way that the Tibetans, who remained in their country, found to protest against the Chinese occupation and atrocities: self-immolation by pouring gasoline all over the body and then dropping a match. This sacrifice, reminiscent of that of Buddhist monks in Vietnam who protested the American presence, captured the imagination of the world and embarrassed the Chinese. Dolma Tsering, a member of the Tibet Parliament in Exile, notes: “Chinese propaganda gives the image of a Tibet bathed in happiness, with a bright future. The fact that 149 people have set themselves on fire since 2009 is a sign that something is wrong. »
** Dolma Tsering, quoted from François Gautier - Les mots du dernier Dalaï-lama (2018, Flammarion)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Death]]
[[Category:Fire]]</text>
      <sha1>f676q5981q2a4axomnujzqc64d84pol</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965170</id>
      <parentid>3965168</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:33:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */ Added a new Quotation from Bitter Winter</comment>
      <origin>3965170</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2434" sha1="2qulqjaku109zbbo9sa66npzshuf0xw" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Death by burning|Death by burning]]''' (also known as '''immolation''') is an [[w:list of execution methods|execution]], [[murder]], or [[suicide]] method involving [[combustion]] or exposure to extreme heat. It has a long history as a form of public [[capital punishment]], and many societies have employed it as a punishment for and warning against crimes such as [[treason]], [[heresy]], and [[witchcraft]]. The best-known execution of this type is '''burning at the stake''', where the condemned is bound to a large wooden stake and a fire lit beneath.

{{stub}}

== Quotes==

* The self-immolation that occurred outside the United Nations in New York on July 3, 2026, marked a grave and symbolic moment in the long history of Tibetan protest. The man who set himself ablaze was Rangzen Lobga, a Tibetan living in exile who chose the act deliberately, framing it as a nonviolent sacrifice for Tibet’s national cause. His final message, released shortly before his death, affirmed that his protest was timed to coincide with the enforcement of China’s new Law for Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress, which came into force on 1 July 2026. The following day, he carried out his act of self-immolation, explaining that it was motivated not by personal hardship but by what he described as the systematic destruction of Tibetan identity.
** Lopsang Gurung (pseudonym), [https://bitterwinter.org/after-a-tibetan-set-himself-on-fire-in-new-york-how-tibetans-react/ &quot;After a Tibetan Set Himself on Fire in New York: How Tibetans React&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 13, 2026)

* This was, at the beginning of the 2000s, the only way that the Tibetans, who remained in their country, found to protest against the Chinese occupation and atrocities: self-immolation by pouring gasoline all over the body and then dropping a match. This sacrifice, reminiscent of that of Buddhist monks in Vietnam who protested the American presence, captured the imagination of the world and embarrassed the Chinese. Dolma Tsering, a member of the Tibet Parliament in Exile, notes: “Chinese propaganda gives the image of a Tibet bathed in happiness, with a bright future. The fact that 149 people have set themselves on fire since 2009 is a sign that something is wrong. »
** Dolma Tsering, quoted from François Gautier - Les mots du dernier Dalaï-lama (2018, Flammarion)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Death]]
[[Category:Fire]]</text>
      <sha1>2qulqjaku109zbbo9sa66npzshuf0xw</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965171</id>
      <parentid>3965170</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:33:44Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3965171</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2438" sha1="99nl8b0lt68t477traqq6lrs87jc01x" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Death by burning|Death by burning]]''' (also known as '''immolation''') is an [[w:list of execution methods|execution]], [[murder]], or [[suicide]] method involving [[combustion]] or exposure to extreme heat. It has a long history as a form of public [[capital punishment]], and many societies have employed it as a punishment for and warning against crimes such as [[treason]], [[heresy]], and [[witchcraft]]. The best-known execution of this type is '''burning at the stake''', where the condemned is bound to a large wooden stake and a fire lit beneath.

{{stub}}

== Quotes==

* The self-immolation that occurred outside the United Nations in New York on July 3, 2026, marked a grave and symbolic moment in the long history of Tibetan protest. The man who set himself ablaze was Rangzen Lobga, a Tibetan living in exile who chose the act deliberately, framing it as a nonviolent sacrifice for Tibet’s national cause. His final message, released shortly before his death, affirmed that his protest was timed to coincide with the enforcement of China’s new Law for Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress, which came into force on 1 July 2026. The following day, he carried out his act of self-immolation, explaining that it was motivated not by personal hardship but by what he described as the systematic destruction of Tibetan [[identity]].
** Lopsang Gurung (pseudonym), [https://bitterwinter.org/after-a-tibetan-set-himself-on-fire-in-new-york-how-tibetans-react/ &quot;After a Tibetan Set Himself on Fire in New York: How Tibetans React&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 13, 2026)

* This was, at the beginning of the 2000s, the only way that the Tibetans, who remained in their country, found to protest against the Chinese occupation and atrocities: self-immolation by pouring gasoline all over the body and then dropping a match. This sacrifice, reminiscent of that of Buddhist monks in Vietnam who protested the American presence, captured the imagination of the world and embarrassed the Chinese. Dolma Tsering, a member of the Tibet Parliament in Exile, notes: “Chinese propaganda gives the image of a Tibet bathed in happiness, with a bright future. The fact that 149 people have set themselves on fire since 2009 is a sign that something is wrong. »
** Dolma Tsering, quoted from François Gautier - Les mots du dernier Dalaï-lama (2018, Flammarion)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Death]]
[[Category:Fire]]</text>
      <sha1>99nl8b0lt68t477traqq6lrs87jc01x</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965174</id>
      <parentid>3965171</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:42:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3965174</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2485" sha1="pkpl2md78md5aruzdomdk83a7lu8lnx" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Death by burning|Death by burning]]''' (also known as '''immolation''') is an [[w:list of execution methods|execution]], [[murder]], or [[suicide]] method involving [[combustion]] or exposure to extreme heat. It has a long history as a form of public [[capital punishment]], and many societies have employed it as a punishment for and warning against crimes such as [[treason]], [[heresy]], and [[witchcraft]]. The best-known execution of this type is '''burning at the stake''', where the condemned is bound to a large wooden stake and a fire lit beneath.

{{stub}}

== Quotes==

* The self-immolation that occurred outside the United Nations in New York on July 3, 2026, marked a grave and symbolic moment in the long history of Tibetan protest. The man who set himself ablaze was Rangzen Lobga, a Tibetan living in exile who chose the act deliberately, framing it as a nonviolent sacrifice for Tibet’s national cause. His final message, released shortly before his death, affirmed that his protest was timed to coincide with the enforcement of China’s new [[Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress|Law for Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress]], which came into force on 1 July 2026. The following day, he carried out his act of self-immolation, explaining that it was motivated not by personal hardship but by what he described as the systematic destruction of Tibetan [[identity]].
** Lopsang Gurung (pseudonym), [https://bitterwinter.org/after-a-tibetan-set-himself-on-fire-in-new-york-how-tibetans-react/ &quot;After a Tibetan Set Himself on Fire in New York: How Tibetans React&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 13, 2026)

* This was, at the beginning of the 2000s, the only way that the Tibetans, who remained in their country, found to protest against the Chinese occupation and atrocities: self-immolation by pouring gasoline all over the body and then dropping a match. This sacrifice, reminiscent of that of Buddhist monks in Vietnam who protested the American presence, captured the imagination of the world and embarrassed the Chinese. Dolma Tsering, a member of the Tibet Parliament in Exile, notes: “Chinese propaganda gives the image of a Tibet bathed in happiness, with a bright future. The fact that 149 people have set themselves on fire since 2009 is a sign that something is wrong. »
** Dolma Tsering, quoted from François Gautier - Les mots du dernier Dalaï-lama (2018, Flammarion)

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:Death]]
[[Category:Fire]]</text>
      <sha1>pkpl2md78md5aruzdomdk83a7lu8lnx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Czech Republic</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>273314</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965066</id>
      <parentid>3940492</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:49:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Undid revision [[Special:Diff/3940492|3940492]] by [[Special:Contributions/~2026-28865-63|~2026-28865-63]] ([[User talk:~2026-28865-63|talk]])</comment>
      <origin>3965066</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3232" sha1="fbhw3joxkaqg3wakpjvksgfqlfwpor8" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Flag of the Czech Republic.svg|thumb| Few would have imagined that the Czech Republic would become a free nation, a member of [[NATO]], a leader of a [[European Union|united Europe]]. Those ideas would have been dismissed as [[dreams]]. We are here today because enough people ignored the voices who told them that the world could not change. We're here today because of the [[courage]] of those who stood up and took risks to say that [[freedom]] is a right for all people, no matter what side of a [[wall]] they live on, and no matter what they look like. —[[Barack Obama]]]]
The '''[[w:Czech Republic|Czech Republic]]''' is a country in [[Central Europe]]. Historically known as '''Bohemia''', it is bordered by [[Austria]] to the south, [[Germany]] to the west, [[Poland]] to the northeast, and [[Slovakia]] to the southeast. Its current President is [[Petr Pavel]] and its current Prime Minister is [[Petr Fiala]].

{{geography-stub}}
== Quotes about ==
* Few would have imagined that the Czech Republic would become a free nation, a member of [[NATO]], a leader of a [[European Union|united Europe]]. Those ideas would have been dismissed as [[dreams]]. We are here today because enough people ignored the voices who told them that the world could not change. We're here today because of the [[courage]] of those who stood up and took risks to say that [[freedom]] is a right for all people, no matter what side of a [[wall]] they live on, and no matter what they look like. We are here today because of the [[w:Prague_Spring|Prague Spring]] -- because the simple and principled pursuit of [[liberty]] and [[opportunity]] shamed those who relied on the power of [[Tank|tanks]] and [[Firearm|arms]] to put down the will of a people. We are here today because 20 years ago, the people of this city took to the streets to claim the promise of a new day, and the fundamental [[human rights]] that had been denied them for far too long. 
** [[Barack Obama]], [https://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/barackobama/barackobamapraguespeech.htm Speech at Hradcany Square in Prague], delivered 5 April 2009, Czech Republic
* Sametová Revoluce -- the [[w:Velvet_Revolution|Velvet Revolution]] taught us many things. It showed us that peaceful [[protest]] could shake the foundations of an [[empire]], and expose the emptiness of an [[ideology]]. It showed us that small countries can play a pivotal role in [[International relations|world events]], and that young people can lead the way in overcoming old conflicts. And it proved that moral leadership is more powerful than any weapon. That's why I'm speaking to you in the center of a [[Europe]] that is peaceful, united and free -- because ordinary people believed that divisions could be bridged, even when their leaders did not. They believed that walls could come down; that peace could prevail. We are here today because [[United States|Americans]] and Czechs believed against all odds that today could be possible.
** [[Barack Obama]], [https://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/barackobama/barackobamapraguespeech.htm Speech at Hradcany Square in Prague], delivered 5 April 2009, Czech Republic

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia-inline}}
[[Category:Czech Republic| ]]</text>
      <sha1>fbhw3joxkaqg3wakpjvksgfqlfwpor8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Inside Out 2</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>274981</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965244</id>
      <parentid>3957513</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:48:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External Links */</comment>
      <origin>3965244</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="28393" sha1="82bjtr9xhpwvag4i8js8301pdyllrzj" xml:space="preserve">

==Dialogue==
:'''Joy''': ''[as Riley goes to the penalty box, two minutes for tripping; voice-over]'' Okay, looks like we have a couple of minutes while Riley takes a breather. Let me catch you up. Riley is still exceptional. And not just because she's the top of her class, which by the way, she is. She's also really kind, and she's nice to stray cats, I mean, come on! Oh, and she's officially a teenager now. She got very tall, very fast.
:'''Anger''': ''[off-screen]'' Did we grow overnight?!
:'''Sadness''': ''[off-screen]'' Oh. That was our favorite shirt.
:'''Joy''': ''[voice-over]'' We even got braces with extra rubber bands!
:'''Dentist''': How does it feel?
:'''Riley''': Great! ''[one of the extra rubber bands snaps off from her braces and hits the dentist's face]''
:'''Dentist''': Ow.
:'''Riley''': Sorry.
:'''Joy''': Riley's personality islands are still going strong.
:'''Disgust''': Glad to see Boy Band Island finally broke up.
:'''Fear''': But Goofball is still monkeying around! ''[laughs]''
:'''Sadness''': Wait, where's Family Island?
:'''Joy''': It's right there. ''[gives Sadness binoculars]''
:'''Sadness''': ''[sees Family Island through the binoculars, revealing to be smaller than the other islands]'' Oh, there it is. But what's that blocking it?
:'''Joy''': Oh, that's Friendship Island. Isn't it amazing? ''[voice-over]'' But we realized her islands aren't the only things made by memories. Way down, at the root level, these memories were also creating beliefs.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Coach Roberts''': ''[to Riley, Grace, and Bree]'' Hey, girls. Congratulations on your win!
:'''Joy''': ''[gasps]'' That's the high school coach! ''[she and Disgust exclaim excitedly]''
:'''Coach Roberts''': What a game! That last play? Whoo! The three of you were impressive!
:'''Riley''': Thanks, Coach Roberts.
:'''Coach Roberts''': Look, its last minute, but every year, I do a three-day skills camp. I invite all the best players in the area. I love for you girls to come.
:'''Fear''': Are we in a dream right now? Please, can somebody pinch me? ''[Anger punches him in the arm]'' Definitely awake.
:'''Joy''': If we impress Coach, she'll put the three of us on the team next year.
:'''Anger''': Ooh, the Fire Hawks. Finally, a team I can get behind!
:'''Coach Roberts''': What do you say?
:'''Riley''': YES! Thank you, Coach! Thank you, thank you!
:'''Bree and Grace''': ''[in unison]'' YES!
:'''Coach Roberts''': Great! We'll see you tomorrow. ''[Riley and her friends squeal in excitement; Later that evening, at Riley's house...]''
:'''Jill''': What a big day!
:'''Bill''': Ha! You are such an all-star! Oh, you're going to knock the coach's skates off! Hockey scholarship, here we come!
:'''Riley''': ''[happily]'' Dad, stop! It's just hockey camp. I mean who knows what'll happen. ''[inside her mind, the memory of her getting a two-minute penalty for tripping shows up; worried]'' My penalty almost lost us the game today. What if I get to camp and screw it up?
:'''Bill''': Hey, don't talk like that.
:'''Jill''': Yeah. You did great today, honey.
:'''Joy''': Exactly! Mom gets it. ''[removes the memory]''
:'''Riley''': Yeah, I guess.
:'''Jill''': We are so proud of you.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Sadness''': Joy, are you taking that where I think you're taking that?
:'''Joy''': Wanna come this time?
:'''Sadness''': Yes. I-I mean, no. Oh, no. I-I-I really shouldn't.
:'''Joy''': You know, you’re the only one who hasn't been to the Belief System.
:'''Sadness''': Yeah, it’s just that it's new, and I know how important it is, and I don't wanna mess it up, break it, burn it to the ground or anything.
:'''Joy''': Sadness, you won't hurt it, I promise. Have I ever steered you wrong before?
:'''Sadness''': Yeah. Many times.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Jill''': ''[enters Riley's room as Riley wakes up]'' Riley, you aren't packed yet?
:'''Riley''': ''[as Anger presses a button on the console, Riley is frustrated]'' You're always on me! Can't you just lay off for like one second?!
:'''Disgust''': Uh, overreact much?
:'''Anger''': I barely touched it. Those morons broke the console!!!
:'''Jill''': Riley, what's wrong?
:'''Sadness''': Oh. Mom looks sad. ''[presses a button on the console, making Riley feel more emotional]''
:'''Riley''': I'm the WORST! ''[cries]''
:'''Jill''': Oh, no. Honey...
:'''Sadness''': I barely touched it.
:'''Anger''': That's what I said. ''[Riley then sniffs her armpits]''
:'''Disgust''': Let the professional handle this. ''[cracks her knuckles and presses a button on the console, making Riley overreact]''
:'''Riley''': I'm too gross to go to camp, or anyone ever *'''AGAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNN!'''* ''[?]''
:'''Disgust''': Oh, yeah, this is totally broken. ''[Zoom into Jill's mind and her emotions.]''
:'''Jill's Anger''': Well, we all knew this day would come.
:'''Jill's Sadness''': Remember, we agreed not to make a big deal about this.
:'''Jill's Disgust''': But she really does stink.
:'''Jill's Anger''': Oh, it's bad.
:'''Jill's Sadness''': Remain calm. Stick to the prepared script. ''[presses a button on the console, making Jill try to console Riley]''
:'''Jill''': ''[sits down on Riley's bed]'' You are not gross, honey. You're just changing. Remember that beautiful butterfly we saw in the park last week? ''[inside Riley's mind, the emotions are using an extended arm to reach the console]'' Well, that butterfly began as a caterpillar. And just like that caterpillar, you're about to get your wings. But if you have questions...
:'''Joy''': Easy... ''[The hand touches a button on the console, making Riley overreact more.]''
:'''Riley''': ''[irritated]'' Oh, my gosh, Mom! Just go away! [gets up from her bed and leaves]'' UGH!
:'''Jill's Anger''': Well, that's a preview of the next ten years.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Disgust''': ''[notices Bree with a worried smile on her face]'' Wait, what was that?
:'''Joy''': What was what?
:'''Disgust''': We got a look. I don't like this.
:'''Joy''': What? You're paranoid.
:'''Disgust''': I never miss a look. ''[brings up a panel and begins typing; a system begins examining Bree and the screen zooms in on her pushed eyebrows]'' Enhance 224, 176. Track right, zoom in, right... there!
:'''Anger''': So?
:'''Disgust''': She's hiding something. But what? ''[Riley is suspicious; zoom into Bree's mind and emotions.]''
:'''Bree's Sadness''': What is she doing?
:'''Bree's Anger''': She's looking at our look!
:'''Bree's Disgust''': No, it's much more than that. ''[brings up the same panel and types, comparing Riley's suspicious expression with the same system]''
:'''Bree's Joy''': She looks the same to me.
:'''Bree's Disgust''': Overlay and compare. See? Riley then, Riley now. Riley then, Riley now.
:'''Bree's Anger''': It's so obvious.
:'''Bree's Sadness''': But what does it mean?
:'''Bree's Disgust''': ''[realizes]'' She knows we're hiding something. ''[Zoom into Grace's mind and emotions.]''
:'''Grace's Disgust''': What is happening right now?!
:'''Grace's Fear''': I don't know! I DON'T KNOW!
:'''Grace's Anger''': I can't take it anymore!
:''[Grace's Fear accidentally activates the console, making Grace reveal the bad news.]''
:'''Grace's Disgust''': You spilled the tea!
:'''Grace''': ''[blurting out]'' Coach Roberts isn't gonna be our coach next year! ''[shockingly covers her mouth and whimpers]''
:'''Bree''': ''[nudges Grace]'' Grace! We... ''[sighs]'' We got assigned to a different high school.
:'''Disgust''': Ah-ha! (What?) Oh... Oh, no.
:'''Riley''': ''[hesitantly]'' Oh... Okay. Um... Yeah. No big deal.
:'''Fear''': This is a HUGE deal!
:'''Anger''': Our life is over!
:'''Disgust''': Is she serious right now? How long have they known us?
:'''Anger''': We can't go to high school without Bree and Grace?
:'''Sadness''': We won't know anybody.
:'''Bree''': We'll still get to hang out.
:'''Grace''': And we'll have this weekend, which means we'll get one last time playing on the same team.
:'''Bree''': Friends are forever, right?
:'''Riley''': Yeah. Of course.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Just as Riley arrives at hockey camp, she comes face-to-face with Valentino Ortiz.]''
:'''Val''': You're the one Coach told us about. Riley, from... Michigan, right? 
:'''Anger''': It's Minnesota, sweetie!
:'''Disgust''': No, no, no, no! We cannot correct Val Ortiz. ''[The console suddenly turns orange, with Riley speaking in an anxious manner.]''
:'''Riley''': Yep, that's me. Riley from good ol' Michigan. ''[chuckles nervously]''
:'''Joy''': ''[confused]'' Orange? Who made the console orange?
:'''Anger''': Do I look orange?
:'''Fear''': I didn't touch it. 
:'''Disgust''': Orange is not my color. 
:'''Sadness''': Not me.
:''[As they back away, they see what appears to be a new orange emotion with upturn frizzy hair, and wearing a striped-orange and white sweater and brown pants.]''
:'''Anxiety''': Hello, everybody! ''[the emotions scream in surprise as Joy protects them]'' Oh, my gosh. I am just such a huge fan of yours! And now, here I am, meeting you, face to face. ''[squeals]'' Okay. How can I help?
:'''Joy''': Uh...
:'''Anxiety''': I can either take notes, get coffee, manage your calendar, walk your dog, carry your things, watch you sleep.
:'''Joy''': Wow, you have a lot of energy. Maybe you could just stay in once place.
:'''Anxiety''': Anything. Just call my name and I'm here for you.
:'''Joy''': Okay, love that and what was your name again?
:'''Anxiety''': Oh! I'm sorry. I got ahead of myself. Uh, I'm Anxiety. Uh, I'm one of Riley's new emotions and we are just super jazzed to be here. ''[carries three suitcases on each arm]'' Where can I put my stuff?
:'''Disgust''': Ah-ah-ah. What do you mean &quot;we&quot;?
:''[A little cyan emotion with sparkly eyes then appears as she climbs up on the console.]''
:'''Envy''': ''[sighs]'' I wish I was as tall as all of you...
:'''Anger''': Who the heck are you?
:'''Envy''': I'm Envy. ''[gazes at Disgust's hair]'' Oh, look at your hair.
:'''Disgust''': Oh, yeah. Not happening.
:'''Envy''': ''[looks at Val; gasps]'' Look at her hair! We need hair like ''that''. ''[presses a button on the console]''
:'''Riley''': Oh, my gosh. I love the red in your hair. ''[slowly reaches out her hand to touch Val's red streak]''
:'''Val''': ''[nervously]'' Oh. Uh...
:'''Disgust''': ''[gasps]'' What are you doing!? ''[panicky grabs Envy and pulls her away from the console]''
:'''Riley''': Hey, maybe when I make the team, I can join Team Redhead, too! Yeah, yeah!
:''[A big pink emotion, wearing a gray hoodie, presses his hand on the console, making her blush in shock as he whimpers.]''
:'''Anger''': Okay, who's this guy?
:'''Sadness''': What's your name, big fella?
:'''Anxiety''': That's Embarrassment. He's not really big on eye contact or like good talking, but he's a really sweet guy.
:'''Joy''': Well, welcome to Headquarters, Embarrassment. Oh. We're doing a fist? No? Going high. ''[high-fives him]'' You got a real sweaty palm there, buddy. ''[Embarrassment whimpers and kneels on the floor]''
:'''Val''': Hey. You want to come with me, actually? We can meet some of the other Fire Hawks.
:'''Anxiety''': Oh, this is exciting. But we can't let her know we're excited. ''[The console then turns indigo]''
:'''Riley''': ''[nonchalantly]'' Yep. Sounds good.
:'''Anger''': What emotion was that?
:'''Anxiety''': That's Ennui.
:'''Joy''': En-what?
:''[Pan over to Ennui, an indigo emotion wearing a tracksuit and socks, lounging on the couch while addicting to her phone]''
:'''Ennui''': ''[groans]'' Ennui. It's what you would call &quot;the boredom&quot;.
:'''Joy''': Well, come on up here, En-wur. Am I saying it right? En-wah. No. Oh! Nicknames! I'm gonna call you Oui-Oui.
:'''Ennui''': ''[uncaringly]'' Non.
:'''Fear''': How are you driving?
:'''Ennui''': Console app. ''[shows the app on her phone, demonstrating how it works]''
:'''Anger''': Hey! Stop it! That's enough.
:'''Joy''': Now, now, I know new emotions can sometimes feel unhelpful at first, and you just want to... ''[squeezes Sadness]'' say to them, &quot;Why are you so annoying?&quot;. But I've learned that every emotion is good for Riley. ''[tussles Sadness' hair]'' Even this turkey.
:'''Anger''': ''[reluctantly]'' Okay, fine.
:''[Ennui uses her console app, making Riley act wearily.]''
:'''Riley''': Cool. Lead the way.
:'''Val''': All right, grab your stuff and follow me.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Coach Roberts''': Ladies! Settle in means settle down. I need your focus. Which means now I'm going to need your cellphones. ''All'' of them. ''[the girls all complain over this; tuts]'' You're here to work, not goof around. ''[glares sternly at Riley]'' Got that, Andersen?
:''[Embarrassment presses a button on the console, making Riley blush in foolishness.]''
:'''Riley''': ''[moronically]'' Yes, Coach...
:'''Coach Roberts''': Please put all your phones in the basket. You'll get them back at the end of camp. ''[walks around, holding the basket as all the girls drop their cellphones in it, and so does Riley]''
:'''Grace''': ''[whispering]'' Wow. Coach is ''so'' serious.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Anxiety and the other new emotions sent the original emotions to the Vault inside a jar.]''
:'''Fear''': WE ARE SUPPRESSED EMOTIONS! RUN!!!
:''[The emotions (except Joy) starts losing it.]''
:'''Joy''': Stay calm! Riley's going to be fine. ''Totally'' fine. No need to run.
:'''Bloofy''': Hey, there. You know what we call that? &quot;Denial&quot;. Can you say &quot;denial&quot;? ''[Fear's flashlight points to a 2D preschool show character; the emotions scream]'' Hi, friends! ''[talking to &quot;the audience&quot;; breaking the fourth wall]'' Welcome! It's so good to have you here with us today!
:'''Joy''': ''[laughs]'' It's Bloofy!
:'''Disgust''': From that preschool show Riley used to like?
:'''Bloofy''': That's right, and here's a little secret. ''[presses his nose against the jar, making Fear nervous]'' &lt;small&gt;Riley still likes the show.&lt;/small&gt; ''[walks away from the jar and turns to the audience to sing his song with Joy dancing along in the background; singing]'' ''♪ Stomp like an elephant, scurry like a mouse, make your way down to Bloofy's House! ♪''
:'''Anger''': Please kill me...
:'''Joy''': Bloofy, we're in a real pickle! Could you help us get out of here?
:'''Bloofy''': ''[to the audience]'' Uh, oh! We're gonna need your help! Can you find a way out?
:'''Anger''': ''[annoyed]'' WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO?
:'''Bloofy''': ''[to the emotions]'' My friends! ''[to his shadow and the wall, where the audience would be]'' Do you see a key? ''[silence]'' Hmmm... I don't either.
:'''Fear''': Okay, we're doomed.
:'''Lance Slashblade''': Indeed. Welcome to your eternal fate.
:'''Disgust''': ''[gasps]'' Lance Slashblade?
:'''Sadness''': But he's a video game character. Why is he here?
:'''Disgust''': Yeah, I always thought Riley had a secret crush on him.
:'''Joy''': ''[uninterestedly]'' I never saw the appeal.
:'''Lance Slashblade''': I long to be a hero, but darkness haunts my past.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Disgust''': You listen to me, Lance Slashblade. No one is totally worthless.
:'''Lance Slashblade''': But I am a warrior cursed with a feeble attack.
:'''Disgust''': Then you must make your curse your gift!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Ennui''': ''[exhausted]'' Why are we up so early?
:'''Anxiety''': Because ''mon-ami'', we need to speed things up. And that means we hit the ice early and practice like we've never practiced before.
:'''Ennui''': Aren't we already good at hockey?
:'''Envy''': We're ''good'', but the Fire Hawks are great.
:'''Anxiety''': That's right. ''[Riley misses a puck, making her skate around the rink]'' Every time we miss, we skate a lap around the rink. Hockey is not a game; it is a sport.
:'''Envy''': That was amazing.
:'''Anxiety''': We need to be that good every time. Let's run it again.
:'''Val''': Hey, I see I'm not the only one who likes to start early.
:'''Anxiety''': You guys, it's Val! We had the same idea!
:'''Envy''': We're basically the same person. We're gonna be best friends!
:'''Val''': How long have you been here?
:'''Riley''': I-I don't know. Maybe an hour? I just wanted to get in some extra ice time.
:'''Val''': I'm the same way.
:'''Anxiety''': Oh, my gosh. She gets us.
:'''Val''': See? I told the other girls you'd figure it out. You get what it takes to be the best.
:'''Envy''': Look at us. This is going great.
:'''Anxiety''': Yeah, but we need Val to really like us.
:'''Envy''': Oh! We should ask Val lots of questions. People love talking about themselves.
:'''Riley''': So, what was your freshman year on the Fire Hawks like?
:'''Val''': I mean… It was a lot of work. Like a lot. But it's also how I met my best friends.
:'''Anxiety''': Val is sharing things with ''[squeals]'' US!
:'''Val''': Hey, a few of us are just gonna hang out tonight, order some food. You should come!
:'''Envy''': An exclusive invitation. Mwah-ha-ha! We're going!
:'''Riley''': Really?
:'''Val''': Definitely! It'll be fun.
:'''Coach Roberts''': Alright, ladies, let's warm up.
:'''Grace''': Hey, Riley.
:'''Riley''': Hi.
:'''Envy''': Huh! We are not sharing Val with them.
:'''Val''': Early mornings make me so hungry.
:'''Riley''': I know, right? I'd give anything for a piece of pizza right now.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Riley''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, yeah. Get Up and Glow is so awesome.
:'''Bree''': Riley, what are you talking about? You ''love'' Get Up and Glow.
:'''Riley''': Oh! Uh... Hey, guys.
:'''Envy''': ''[growls frustratedly]'' Oh, why are our best friends always trying to hang out with us!?
:'''Grace''': Come on, Riley, we ''just'' went to their concert.
:'''Riley''': Well, yeah. I mean, sure. But like…
:'''Bree''': But what?
:'''Grace''': We had a great time!
:'''Anxiety''': Grace, you are not helping.
:''[Ennui presses the console again.]''
:'''Riley''': ''[sarcastically]'' Oh, yeah. We had a great time.
:''[The Sar-Chasm keeps growing.]''
:'''Joy''': Why can't they just leave her alone?
:'''Anger''': What are we gonna do now, Joy?!
:'''Joy''': We go the long way, which is the best way. Stretch those hammies, Anger! Let's go!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Joy is trying to get a vehicle to work, whilst Fear, Anger, and Disgust talk amongst themselves about Riley's current state and Joy's plan.]''
:'''Joy''': Okay, well, this isn’t working. And that's fine. Everything’s fine.
:'''Disgust''': This is hopeless. I say we cut our losses and walk back.
:'''Fear''': This whole trip is just a series of deader and deader ends!
:'''Anger''': Ever since that puberty alarm went off, nothing around here works the way it's supposed to!
:'''Disgust''': I don't even recognize this place anymore. It's light out at 1:00 in the morning!
:'''Fear''': I have never been inside so many jars in my life.
:'''Disgust''': And the Riley we knew is ''gone''!
:'''Anger''': And if Joy can't see that, well, then she's delusional!
:'''Joy''': ''[turns around and stares at them]'' Delusional? ''[snaps]'' OF COURSE I'M DELUSIONAL! Do you know how hard it is to stay positive all the time? When all you folks do is complain, complain, complain! Jiminy mother-loving toaster strudel! ''[smacks the controls of the vehicle, whilst Fear cowers and Anger smiles]'' Do you think I have all the answers? Of course I don't! ''[sighs heavily]'' We can't even find the back of her own mind. ''[cowers in front of the control panel]'' Anxiety is right! Riley doesn't need us as much as she needs them. ''[starting to break down into tears]'' And ''that'' hurts... it really hurts.
:''[The other emotions look at each other in guilt, and Anger walks up to Joy]''
:'''Anger''': Joy, you've made a lot of mistakes. A-A lot. And you'll make a whole lot more in the future. But if you let that stop you, we might as well lie down and give up now.
:'''Fear''': Well, actually, that does sound kind of nice. ''[Disgust slaps him]'' Ow!
:'''Anger''': ''[offers Joy his hand]'' Come on.
:''[Anger helps Joy up to her feet, and the emotions continue their journey.]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Joy''': Come on, we just need to cut through… ''[gasps]'' Imagination Land! Oh, you guys are going to love it! There's French Fry Forest, Cloud Town and… ''[notices some changes around]'' Whoa. This place has changed. Mount Crushmore?
:'''Fear''': Those are her top four?
:'''Disgust''': ''[sighs dreamily]'' The only one that matters is Lance.
:'''Joy''': Well, at least they got his good side.
:'''Disgust''': Every side is his good side.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Anxiety''': All we got to do is to sneak into her office and read it. Come on, Riley, move those feet.
:'''Envy''': She doesn't want to...?
:'''Anxiety''': Are we pushing her too hard?
:'''Envy''': We have got to see what's in the notebook. It's the only way for us to know how we can do better. ''[touches the console]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[After Sadness uses Ennui's phone to stop Riley from looking through Coach Roberts' notebook.]''
:'''Anxiety''': Wait, why'd she stop? ''[gasps, seeing the console turning blue]'' Sadness? Ennui! Where's your phone?
:'''Ennui''': ''[starts panicking]'' Ooh-la-la... My phone! Where is my phone? Seriously?! ''[looks under the couch]'' This is not happening! No, no, no, no, NO!
:'''Anxiety''': Okay, she's gotta be here somewhere. Find her.
:'''Envy''': GOTCHA!
:''[Envy and Ennui shove the binders to catch Sadness, but she's not there; Embarrassment sighs in relief.]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[The emotions make it to the back of the mind and see a huge mountain of bad memories.]''
:'''Fear''': ''That'' is a lot.
:'''Joy''': This is more than I remember sending back here.
:'''Disgust''': ''[picks up a memory of Riley bumping her head into a glass door]'' Oh, when she walked into that glass door at that party. Oof!
:'''Joy''': Yeah, and breaking Grandma's favorite plate. Thank goodness these aren't part of her.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Disgust''': Okay, so how do we get her Sense of Self from here to ''there?''
:'''Anger''': ''[sighs]'' I have an idea, but I really don't like it.
:'''Joy''': Anger, Riley needs us.
:'''Anger''': ''[reluctantly]'' OH, POUCHY! ''[echoes; no response]'' Well, what are you waiting for? Say the words.
:'''Emotions''': OH, POUCHY! ''[echoes]''
:'''Pouchy''': ''[suddenly appearing in front of them]'' Hi, everybody! I'm Pouchy!
:'''Anger''': We know!
:'''Joy''': Pouchy, we need to get back to Headquarters. Do you have ''anything'' that can help us?
:'''Pouchy''': I have lots of items. Which one do you think will work the best? A roll of tape, a rubber ducky, or--
:'''Anger''': No time! ''[pulls him down and takes out three sticks of dynamite from his mouth]
:'''Disgust''': Seriously, Pouchy? Dynamite? Don't you have, like, a-a jetpack, a plane or something that's gonna help us?!
:'''Pouchy''': ''[miffed]'' What do you think; I have everything in here?! I offered you the rubber ducky. I offered you the tape.
:'''Joy''': ''[gets an idea]'' I know what to do. But we're gonna need a lot more dynamite.
:'''Pouchy''': You know what? Good luck-- ''[Anger puts his hand back in Pouchy's mouth so he could pull out more dynamite]''

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Coach Roberts''': ''[blowing her whistle after Riley aggressively accidentally crashes into Grace; sharply]'' Andersen! Penalty box, two minutes.
:'''Anxiety''': ''[horrified]'' NO!
:'''Bree''': Grace, are you okay?
:''[Riley watches Bree and Coach Roberts checking on Grace to see if she's alright.]''
:'''Envy''': We hurt Grace!
:'''Anxiety''': It all happened so fast. I didn't even see her!

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[Bree and Grace check on Riley in the penalty box after she calms herself down from her panic attack]''
:'''Grace''': Riley, you okay?
:''[The other emotions step forward while Joy remains by the new Sense of Self.]''
:'''Riley''': ''[gets up]'' Yeah. I mean... no. ''[starts breaking down]'' I was such a jerk to you, guys. When you guys told me you were going to a different school, I freaked out. And... ''[sighs]'' I'm so sorry. If you don't want to be friends anymore, I get it. But… I really hope that you can forgive me… someday.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Anxiety''': I love our girl.
:'''Joy''': How could you not? She's super smart.
:'''Sadness''': And great at hockey.
:'''Disgust''': She's really creative.
:'''Ennui''': She can be bored, but never boring.
:'''Joy''': But she can be a little sarcastic from time to time.
:'''Fear''': She can have really bad ideas.
:'''Anger''': Occasionally, she can do the wrong things.
:'''Joy''': Sometimes, she can be too hard on herself, but every bit of Riley makes her who she is. And we love all of our girl. Every messy, beautiful piece of her.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:''[During the end credits at the Andersen house; the Andersens are eating dinner at the table]''
:'''Jill''': So, Riley, how was camp?
:''[Zoom into Riley's mind]''
:'''Joy''': Okay, we talked about this. We tell them everything.
:'''Riley''': Uh...
:'''Anxiety''': But what about sneaking into Coach's office?
:'''Anger''': What about hitting Grace?
:'''Envy''': Remember the lying?
:'''Disgust''': Are we gonna tell her about the Fire Hawks?
:'''Anger''': She doesn't need to know.
:'''Fear''': Objection!
:'''Ennui''': Pardon. ''Excusez moi''. ''[presses a button on the console app on her phone]''
:'''Riley''': ''[nonchalantly]'' It was good. ''[eats her food]''
:''[Jill makes a &quot;Please tell me you're joking&quot; look before zooming into her mind and her emotions.]''
:'''Jill's Anger''': She goes away for three days and all we get is, &quot;good&quot;?
:'''Jill's Anxiety''': ''[appears from the curtains]'' And what about the red in her hair?! Did she join a gang?
:'''Jill's Sadness''': ''[gives her tea to chill]'' Welcome back, Anxiety.
:''[Zoom into Bill's mind and his emotions.]''
:'''Bill's Anxiety''': ''[pops up]'' She goes away for three days and all we get is, &quot;good&quot;?!
:'''Bill's Anger''': Yeah. Sounds right. Back to the game.

==Taglines==
* Big changes. New emotions.
* Make room for new emotions.
* Contain your emotions.

==Cast==
{{col-begin}}
{{col-2}}
* [[Amy Poehler]] — Joy

* {{w|Phyllis Smith}} — Sadness

* [[Lewis Black]] — Anger

* {{w|Tony Hale}} — Fear

* {{w|Liza Lapira}} — Disgust

* [[Maya Hawke]] — Anxiety

* {{w|Ayo Edebiri}} — Envy

* {{w|Adèle Exarchopoulos}} — Ennui

* {{w|Paul Walter Hauser}} — Embarrassment

* Kensington Tallman — Riley Andersen

* {{w|Diane Lane}} — Jill Andersen

* {{w|Kyle MacLachlan}} — Bill Andersen

* [[w:Lilimar Hernandez|Lilimar]] — Valerie &quot;Val&quot; Ortiz

* Sumayyah Nuriddin-Green — Bree

* Grace Lu — Grace

* Yong Yea — Lance Slashblade

* {{w|Ron Funches}} — Bloofy
{{col-2}}
* {{w|Yvette Nicole Brown}} — Coach Roberts
* Hadlee Gannaway — Pouchy
* [[Steve Purcell]] — Deep Dark Secret
* {{w|Dave Goelz}} — Mind Cop
* {{w|Kirk Thatcher}} — Foreman
* [[Frank Oz]] — Mind Cop #2
* {{w|Paula Pell}} — Jill's Anger
* {{w|Elizabeth Hanna}} — Nostalgia
* {{w|Pete Docter}} — Bill's Anger
* [[Paula Poundstone]] — Forgetter #2
* {{w|John Ratzenberger}} — Frits
* {{w|Sarayu Rao}} — Margie
* [[Flea (musician)|Flea]] — Jak
* {{w|Bobby Moynihan}} — Forgetter
* {{w|Kendall Coyne Schofield}} — Hockey Announcer
* [[w:Lori Alan|Lori Alan]] — Jill's Sadness
* [[w:Carlos Alazraqui|Carlos Alazraqui]] — Bill's Fear
* [[w:Josh Cooley|Josh Cooley]] — Bill's Sadness
* Sherry Lynn — Jill's Disgust and Joy
* Roger Craig Smith — Bill's Anxiety
* Mona Marshall — Jill's Anxiety
{{col-end}}

==External Links==
* {{imdb title|22022452|Inside Out 2}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=inside_out_2|title=Inside Out 2}}

{{wikipedia}}
{{Authority control}}
[[Category:2024 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:2024 American animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:American children's animated drama films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:Animated coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:Comedy-drama films]]
[[Category:Animated films about families]]
[[Category:Animated films about friendship]]
[[Category:Animated films set in San Francisco]]
[[Category:Anime-influenced Western animated films]]
[[Category:Ice hockey films]]
[[Category:American sequel films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Kelsey Mann]]
[[Category:Pixar]]
[[Category:Films about emotions]]
[[Category:Inside Out]]</text>
      <sha1>82bjtr9xhpwvag4i8js8301pdyllrzj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Kathleen Adebola Okikiolu</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>284163</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964892</id>
      <parentid>3927109</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:27:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Staryu</username>
        <id>3148445</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>Grammar</comment>
      <origin>3964892</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8121" sha1="fxzaf6o6ymjhftucqudu5biwyts59x0" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Kate Okikiolu|Kate Adebola Okikiolu]]''' (born 1965) is an African-British [[w:mathematician|mathematician]]. She is known for her work with [[w:Elliptic operator|elliptic differential operators]] as well as her work with inner-city children

==Quotes==
*My father ... went on to a position in the mathematics department of the University of East Anglia. While I was growing up, the elementary school I attended was extremely ethnically homogeneous. I was unable to escape from heavy issues concerning race, which my mother always explained in a political context.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*My parents separated after my father resigned his university position to focus on his inventions, and my mother then finished her education and became a school mathematics teacher. We moved to a very cosmopolitan area of London, which was like a new birth for me; it was there that my interest in mathematics really began.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*I learned mathematics on my own from textbooks which is perhaps strange given that both my parents were involved in the subject. At the same time, I spent a good deal of time studying art and wanted to follow a career in that direction until I was eventually convinced by my family that I should first work for a mathematics degree to ensure that I could earn a living.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*I went to Cambridge, which represented a second major change in my life. As I learned more mathematics, I saw that it is an entire world of its own which many people choose to live in, a world in many ways more real than the real world; it feels permanent, eternal, and offers a deep sense of security because nearly everyone who understands it agrees on what is truth. By the time I had finished at Cambridge, I was very involved with mathematics and did not consider other careers.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*I would like to thank John Garnett for a lot of very helpful advice.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*I do research on a variety of problems in condensed matter physics. My primary interests are in the general field of statistical mechanics.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*My research is in the field of spectral geometry, the study of how the shape of an object affects the modes in which it can resonate. A famous question in the field is, can one hear the shape of a drum? Spectral geometry bridges different branches of science, including engineering and physics, as well as a number of different fields of mathematics. However, quite different sorts of questions are studied within each discipline. I am a mathematical analyst, which gives me an appreciation for the infinite and the infinitesimal. At the moment, one of the things I am working on understanding is the total wavelength of a surface like a sphere or something of greater complexity, such as the surface of a bagel or a pretzel. What is this total wavelength? If you strike a surface it can resonate at any one of a list of frequencies, and the wavelength of the sound produced by the vibration is inversely proportional to the frequency. In the mathematically idealized model there are infinitely many possible wavelengths. The total wavelength should be the sum of all of these individual wavelengths except that this infinite sum equals infinity. Fortunately, a finite number can be assigned to it by a slightly elusive process called regularization. (This process is also used in mathematical physics to mysteriously obtain true answers from formulas which do not really make sense!) I first became interested in the total wavelength as a model related to a question which can be roughly stated as, can one hear the shape of the universe? However, the total wavelength shows up in many quite different areas of mathematics and I am finding these connections intriguing.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*I am a mathematical analyst, and most of my research is in the area of spectral geometry. Problems in spectral geometry are also studied by various kinds of geometers, number theorists, applied mathematicians, mathematical physicists, and others. What is Spectral geometry? Spectral geometry most usually means the study of how the geometry of an object is related to the natural frequencies of the object. These are the frequencies at which the object can vibrate. A vibrating object often produces a sound, and the frequencies can be heard as the dominant tone and the overtones of the sound. The well known question highlighting what spectral geometry is all about is the question &quot;Can one hear the shape of a drum?&quot; I am a mathematical analyst, and most of my research is in the area of spectral geometry. Problems in spectral geometry are also studied by various kinds of geometers, number theorists, applied mathematicians, mathematical physicists, and others. In mathematical terms, the natural frequencies of an object (or rather their squares) are the eigenvalues of a partial differential operator called the Laplacian. This Laplacian takes each function defined on the object and differentiates it twice to give a new function. The eigenvalues of the Laplacian form an infinite sequence of numbers tending to infinity. In spectral geometry we study how these numbers depends on the shape of the object. For people who like to know the full story, I should mention that many spectral geometers (including me) who work on the Laplacian on smooth manifolds study the whole sequence of eigenvalues of the Laplacian. Now the low eigenvalues can give accurate values for the frequencies at which a real life object vibrates, but the very high eigenvalues do not correspond to genuine physical vibrations of the object because of molecular forces and damping. These effects are not included in the model where the vibration is driven by the Laplacian alone. This means that my research is rather different from that of an engineer who wishes to model precisely the vibrations of a real life object. In actual fact the questions I work on are more closely related to mathematics arising in quantum physics and string theory. In addition, I don't always study the Laplacian, but also the eigenvalues of other operators, which might represent other physical quantities than the frequencies of vibration. I mostly study spectral geometry for nice smooth objects such as spheres and tori, but some people work on rough objects and even discrete objects like graphs. In the last eight years, I have worked mostly on the spectral zeta function, which is an infinite sum of powers of the eigenvalues. In particular, I have worked on the zeta-regularised determinant, which is used in topology, quantum field theory, and string theory. Recently, I have been very interested in the sum of squares of the wavelength of a surface, which is related to all kinds of different things including vortex theory.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]
*Although I cannot claim to find it easy to balance my ambitions in mathematical research with the desire to be a good parent, to be an inspiring teacher, or to effect positive social change in the world, I do feel very fortunate to be able to spend my life tackling these challenges, which are extremely interesting and important to me.
**[https://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Okikiolu_Katherine/ Okikiolu Katherine Biography]

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Okikiolu, Kathleen}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Women academics from England]]
[[Category:Mathematicians from England]]
[[Category:Women scientists from England]]</text>
      <sha1>fxzaf6o6ymjhftucqudu5biwyts59x0</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Codename: Kids Next Door – Operation: V.I.D.E.O.G.A.M.E.</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>285141</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964921</id>
      <parentid>3953674</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:54:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Voice Cast */ There were NO Sonic characters in this game.</comment>
      <origin>3964921</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2162" sha1="2q87ssieuifg42stz0ysiabzxtm08rp" xml:space="preserve">'''Codename: Kids Next Door - Operation: Villains.In.Detention.Escape.Outpost.Growing.Amalgam.Mega.Enomously.''' is a 2005 action adventure game based on [[Codename: Kids Next Door]].

==Nigel Uno/Numbuh One==
* Welcome to the world. A world ruled by adults. A world where kids are forced to take naps, allowed only a limited time to play video games and are marched off to schools to learn the grown ups’ version of history. A world where every precious moment of our free time is replaced by homework and piano lessons. Where our dinner plates are piled high with horrible, shriveled, slimy green vegetables. But, there is a group of kids who have stood up to say no. A group committed to battling the forces of adulthood and restoring freedom to kids anywhere. Recruiting from the best and brightest kids around the globe, all are under the age of 13 and operating under the direction of our global command center on the surface of the moon. We are the Kids Next Door!
* Kids Next Door, battle stations!
* You’ve really outdone yourself, Numbuh 2! This VR simulator is incredible! He looks so real… so… pathetic!
* Knightbrace’s Cavity Cave! Those fireflies were right after all. Bug-Brite Toothpaste won’t be unleashed on the children of the world if the Kids Next Door can help it!

==Dialogue==
:'''Numbuh One''': I’m impressed, Numbuh Two. You actually built a virtual mission simulator.
:'''Numbuh Two''': I made it Numbuh One size fits all! Hahaha!

==Voice Cast==
* Benjamin Diskin as Numbuh One, Numbuh Two
* Lauren Tom as Numbuh Three
* [[Dee Bradley Baker]] as Numbuh Four, Toiletnator
* Cree Summer as Numbuh Five
* [[Mark Hamill]] as Stickybeard
* [[Grey DeLisle]] as Gramma Stuffum
* [[Tom Kenny]] as Knightbrace, Common Cold
* Daran Norris as Count Spankulot
* Jennifer Hale as Numbuh Eighty Six
* Maurice LaMarche as Father

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
[[Category:PlayStation 2 video games]]
[[Category:GameCube video games]]
[[Category:Xbox video games]]
[[Category:2005 video games]]
[[Category:Codename: Kids Next Door]]
[[Category:Video games based on animated television series]]
[[Category:Cartoon Network video games]]</text>
      <sha1>2q87ssieuifg42stz0ysiabzxtm08rp</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Naomi Mitchison</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>285296</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965089</id>
      <parentid>3952451</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:45:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-37901-58</username>
        <id>3347286</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>C. L. Moore quote about Naomi Mitchison added.</comment>
      <origin>3965089</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8618" sha1="ct9n4bb5n5x7e6u0jban9i98lo1r1k1" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Naomi Mitchison|Naomi Mary Margaret Mitchison, Baroness Mitchison}}''' {{w|Commander of the Order of the British Empire|CBE}} (née '''Haldane'''; 1 November 1897 – 11 January 1999) was a Scottish author of historical novels, plays, essays, short stories, science fiction, history, nonfiction on politics and ethics, travel writing, poetry, and autobiography. She also was the editor of the 1932 book ''An Outline for Boys and Girls and Their Parents'', a guide to the modern world for children. Her father was {{w|John Scott Haldane}}, who gave her an early exposure to [[science]]. In 1985 she was made {{w|Commander of the Order of the British Empire}}.

{{author-stub}}
==Quotes==
* ... Obviously my chief authority is [[Xenophon]]'s {{w|Hellenica#Xenophon's Hellenica|Hellenica}}; if I can induce anyone to read this (the [https://archive.org/details/xenophonhellenic0005xeno Loeb translation] is very vivid on the whole) and get as much pleasure out of it as I did, then I shall be — as the good books say — amply rewarded. For actual history I have gone to [https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eugène_Cavaignac_(historien) Cavaignac] or {{w|Adolf Holm|Holm}}.  ... {{w|Alfred Eckhard Zimmern|Zimmern}}'s [https://archive.org/details/greekcommonwealt011103mbp The Greek Commonwealth] is a good book to begin on.
** {{cite book|title=Cloud Cuckoo Land|location=London|publisher=Jonathan Cape Ltd|year=1926|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=wptAAAAAIAAJ&amp;pg=PA5|page=5}} (1st printing 1925)

* The first thing about science is asking [[question]]s; the next—and this includes the bulk of what is called scientific work—is measuring the [[knowledge]] and finding new standards of measurement; and the final thing is putting all this knowledge together.
** {{cite book|title=An Outline for Boys &amp; Girls and Their Parents|series=Educational Series|location=London|publisher=Victor Gollancz Ltd|year=1932|isbn=0848250265|chapter=Editor's Preface|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=iDCeaFqdmqQC&amp;focus=searchwithinvolume&amp;q=meas-|page=6}} [https://archive.org/stream/dli.ernet.524092/524092-An%20Outline%20For%20Boys%20And%20Girls%20And%20Their%20Parents%20Civilization_djvu.txt text at archive.org]

* Do not let us delude ourselves; the old forces still have the [[power]]; they are not any longer dressed up as kings and barons with gold on their necks and swords in their hands; they are dressed respectably, and their gold is in banks, and they pay other people to do the killing. And because, deep down, they have no faith in the future, and instead of loving mankind they despise and distrust it, they are becoming more vile and brutal.
** {{cite book|title=Vienna Diary |publisher=Victor Gollancz |year=1934}} 

* The wound is healed, the secret told, the riddle becomes plain, the reconciliation is made between man and what surrounds him. Each happening depends on the other. But if it was for all time, the flowers might go on blooming but the spirit would wither. It would be sad beyond all telling if the finding of the [[Holy Grail| Grail]] were to happen once for all. Because then it could not happen again for anyone.
** {{cite book|title=To The Chapel Perilous |publisher=Allen &amp; Unwin |year=1955}} 

* My father was writing one paper after another in conjunction with various people, {{w|Arthur Boycott|Boycott}}, {{w|Guybon Chesney Castell Damant|Damant}}, Butterfield, {{w|James Lorrain Smith|Lorrain-Smith}}, {{w|John Gillies Priestley|Gillies Priestley}} and others, but especially {{w|Claude Gordon Douglas|C. G. Douglas}} ...
** {{cite book|title=All Change Here: Girlhood and Marriage|publisher=Bodley Head|year=1975|isbn=0370104854|page=64|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=IChbAAAAMAAJ&amp;focus=searchwithinvolume&amp;q=butterfield}} (E. E. Butterfield, M.D., did research with Ralph G. Stillman, M.D., who was president of the {{w|AABB}} in 1949.)

* ... readers, remember that my account of what was happening in [[Sparta]] or [[Athens]] or even [[Egypt]], is all based on real history, but the view was moulded by what I—and many another person—was thinking in the Europe of those days, with [[Mussolini]] and his fascists in Italy and already the shadow of [[Hitler]] in Germany. If I was writing this book now I might treat my characters and my story differently. But I cannot be certain, even of that.
** {{cite book|title=The Corn King &amp; the Spring Queen|isbn=978-1-46830-529-6|chapter=Introduction|year=1990|location=Woodstock, New York|publisher=The Overlook Press|chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=fAmUDwAAQBAJ&amp;pg=PT10}} (1st edition, 1931)

==Quotes about Naomi Mitchison==
* It occurred to the writer, a year ago, in thinking about modern Ireland, to wonder what light the record of [[Julius Caesar|Cæsar]]’s Gallic wars might throw on the causes of the present discontents. {{w|Dumnorix}}, {{w|Ambiorix}}, {{w|Vercingetorix}}—were these leaders of the Gauls like the leaders of the Gael to-day? Did they feel the same blinding passion of nationalism? Were they, too, distracted by feuds and harassed by jealousies? Is the Celtic temper an undeviating possession of the centuries ; and is the character of a stock inherited as surely and as inevitably as the colour of eyes and hair ?&lt;br&gt;To find an answer to these questions it would have been necessary to read those later books of the {{w|Commentarii de Bello Gallico|''De Bello Gallico''}}, to which (however skilled we may become in the structure of the bridge which Cæsar threw over the Rhine) few, if any, of us ever attain in our schoolboy days. For such reading no opportunity occurred; but the fortunate chance of an old friendship brought another solution. I was privileged to read the manuscript of Mrs. Mitchison’s work, and the answer came, irradiated by an historical imagination, and animated by a living sympathy, as I read.
** {{w|Ernest Barker}} in the Preface to {{cite book|author=Mitchison, Naomi|title=The Conquered|year=1929|location=London|publisher=Jonathan Cape Ltd|series=The Travellers' Library|url=https://archive.org/details/conquered0000naom}} (reprint of 1927 edition; 1st edition 1923)

* Mrs. Mitichison brings {{w|Julius Caesar|Cæsar}} on her stage, and gives one the feeling of that bleak and terrible [[greatness]]. The impression which Cæsar has left on history is just the impression he made on his contemporaries. The shadow of a vastness had fallen coldly across them. Mrs. Mitchison knows how to make it fall across ''us''. She has, as it were by miracle, got back into the air and mood of the time she writes about: she creates, and recreates. The splendor and the mystery come easy to her.
** [[Gerald Gould]], {{cite book|title=The English Novel of To-day|publisher=John Castle|year=1924|isbn=0836956974|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=O1kyvwEACAAJ&amp;pg=PA157|page=157}}

* By all means read Naomi Mitchison's ''The Corn King and the Spring Queen''. It's an enormous volume not much shorter than [[Hervey Allen|Anthony Adverse]], and deals in the most vivid and convincing detail with a [[barbarian]] girl (who incidentally works causal [[magic (supernatural)|magic]] now and then), all her family and friends, a Spartan girl et al., and their experiences in Rome, Sparta, Alexandria and the barbarian hinterlands. The thing is good, almost, as a real tour of the places she tells about. You have the feeling of actually having lived in Sparta and Alexandria...It's well worth reading just for the experience.
** [[C. L. Moore]], Letter to [[H. P. Lovecraft]],  27 May 1935. Quoted in '' H.P. Lovecraft: Letters to C. L. Moore and Others'', edited by S. T. Joshi and David E. Schultz.  Hippocampus Press, 2017 ( p.41).

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}
* {{commons category-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Mitchison, Naomi}}
[[Category:1897 births]]
[[Category:1999 deaths]]
[[Category:Historical novelists]]
[[Category:Novelists from Scotland]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors from Scotland]]
[[Category:Journalists from Scotland]]
[[Category:People from Edinburgh]]
[[Category:Playwrights from Scotland]]
[[Category:Socialist feminists]]
[[Category:Socialists]] 
[[Category:Women authors from Scotland]]
[[Category:Science fiction authors from the United Kingdom]]
[[Category:Short story writers from Scotland]]
[[Category:Cultural critics]]
[[Category:Historians from Scotland]] 
[[Category:Autobiographers from Scotland]]
[[Category:Essayists from Scotland]]
[[Category:Memoirists from Scotland]]
[[Category:Travel writers]] 
[[Category:Political authors from Scotland]]
[[Category:University of Oxford alumni]]
[[Category:Centenarians]]</text>
      <sha1>ct9n4bb5n5x7e6u0jban9i98lo1r1k1</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965094</id>
      <parentid>3965089</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:59:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-37901-58</username>
        <id>3347286</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes about Naomi Mitchison */</comment>
      <origin>3965094</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8621" sha1="6sea1izll5oaz6m36ifcr0mbjvc880e" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Naomi Mitchison|Naomi Mary Margaret Mitchison, Baroness Mitchison}}''' {{w|Commander of the Order of the British Empire|CBE}} (née '''Haldane'''; 1 November 1897 – 11 January 1999) was a Scottish author of historical novels, plays, essays, short stories, science fiction, history, nonfiction on politics and ethics, travel writing, poetry, and autobiography. She also was the editor of the 1932 book ''An Outline for Boys and Girls and Their Parents'', a guide to the modern world for children. Her father was {{w|John Scott Haldane}}, who gave her an early exposure to [[science]]. In 1985 she was made {{w|Commander of the Order of the British Empire}}.

{{author-stub}}
==Quotes==
* ... Obviously my chief authority is [[Xenophon]]'s {{w|Hellenica#Xenophon's Hellenica|Hellenica}}; if I can induce anyone to read this (the [https://archive.org/details/xenophonhellenic0005xeno Loeb translation] is very vivid on the whole) and get as much pleasure out of it as I did, then I shall be — as the good books say — amply rewarded. For actual history I have gone to [https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eugène_Cavaignac_(historien) Cavaignac] or {{w|Adolf Holm|Holm}}.  ... {{w|Alfred Eckhard Zimmern|Zimmern}}'s [https://archive.org/details/greekcommonwealt011103mbp The Greek Commonwealth] is a good book to begin on.
** {{cite book|title=Cloud Cuckoo Land|location=London|publisher=Jonathan Cape Ltd|year=1926|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=wptAAAAAIAAJ&amp;pg=PA5|page=5}} (1st printing 1925)

* The first thing about science is asking [[question]]s; the next—and this includes the bulk of what is called scientific work—is measuring the [[knowledge]] and finding new standards of measurement; and the final thing is putting all this knowledge together.
** {{cite book|title=An Outline for Boys &amp; Girls and Their Parents|series=Educational Series|location=London|publisher=Victor Gollancz Ltd|year=1932|isbn=0848250265|chapter=Editor's Preface|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=iDCeaFqdmqQC&amp;focus=searchwithinvolume&amp;q=meas-|page=6}} [https://archive.org/stream/dli.ernet.524092/524092-An%20Outline%20For%20Boys%20And%20Girls%20And%20Their%20Parents%20Civilization_djvu.txt text at archive.org]

* Do not let us delude ourselves; the old forces still have the [[power]]; they are not any longer dressed up as kings and barons with gold on their necks and swords in their hands; they are dressed respectably, and their gold is in banks, and they pay other people to do the killing. And because, deep down, they have no faith in the future, and instead of loving mankind they despise and distrust it, they are becoming more vile and brutal.
** {{cite book|title=Vienna Diary |publisher=Victor Gollancz |year=1934}} 

* The wound is healed, the secret told, the riddle becomes plain, the reconciliation is made between man and what surrounds him. Each happening depends on the other. But if it was for all time, the flowers might go on blooming but the spirit would wither. It would be sad beyond all telling if the finding of the [[Holy Grail| Grail]] were to happen once for all. Because then it could not happen again for anyone.
** {{cite book|title=To The Chapel Perilous |publisher=Allen &amp; Unwin |year=1955}} 

* My father was writing one paper after another in conjunction with various people, {{w|Arthur Boycott|Boycott}}, {{w|Guybon Chesney Castell Damant|Damant}}, Butterfield, {{w|James Lorrain Smith|Lorrain-Smith}}, {{w|John Gillies Priestley|Gillies Priestley}} and others, but especially {{w|Claude Gordon Douglas|C. G. Douglas}} ...
** {{cite book|title=All Change Here: Girlhood and Marriage|publisher=Bodley Head|year=1975|isbn=0370104854|page=64|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=IChbAAAAMAAJ&amp;focus=searchwithinvolume&amp;q=butterfield}} (E. E. Butterfield, M.D., did research with Ralph G. Stillman, M.D., who was president of the {{w|AABB}} in 1949.)

* ... readers, remember that my account of what was happening in [[Sparta]] or [[Athens]] or even [[Egypt]], is all based on real history, but the view was moulded by what I—and many another person—was thinking in the Europe of those days, with [[Mussolini]] and his fascists in Italy and already the shadow of [[Hitler]] in Germany. If I was writing this book now I might treat my characters and my story differently. But I cannot be certain, even of that.
** {{cite book|title=The Corn King &amp; the Spring Queen|isbn=978-1-46830-529-6|chapter=Introduction|year=1990|location=Woodstock, New York|publisher=The Overlook Press|chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=fAmUDwAAQBAJ&amp;pg=PT10}} (1st edition, 1931)

==Quotes about Naomi Mitchison==
* It occurred to the writer, a year ago, in thinking about modern Ireland, to wonder what light the record of [[Julius Caesar|Cæsar]]’s Gallic wars might throw on the causes of the present discontents. {{w|Dumnorix}}, {{w|Ambiorix}}, {{w|Vercingetorix}}—were these leaders of the Gauls like the leaders of the Gael to-day? Did they feel the same blinding passion of nationalism? Were they, too, distracted by feuds and harassed by jealousies? Is the Celtic temper an undeviating possession of the centuries ; and is the character of a stock inherited as surely and as inevitably as the colour of eyes and hair ?&lt;br&gt;To find an answer to these questions it would have been necessary to read those later books of the {{w|Commentarii de Bello Gallico|''De Bello Gallico''}}, to which (however skilled we may become in the structure of the bridge which Cæsar threw over the Rhine) few, if any, of us ever attain in our schoolboy days. For such reading no opportunity occurred; but the fortunate chance of an old friendship brought another solution. I was privileged to read the manuscript of Mrs. Mitchison’s work, and the answer came, irradiated by an historical imagination, and animated by a living sympathy, as I read.
** {{w|Ernest Barker}} in the Preface to {{cite book|author=Mitchison, Naomi|title=The Conquered|year=1929|location=London|publisher=Jonathan Cape Ltd|series=The Travellers' Library|url=https://archive.org/details/conquered0000naom}} (reprint of 1927 edition; 1st edition 1923)

* Mrs. Mitichison brings {{w|Julius Caesar|Cæsar}} on her stage, and gives one the feeling of that bleak and terrible [[greatness]]. The impression which Cæsar has left on history is just the impression he made on his contemporaries. The shadow of a vastness had fallen coldly across them. Mrs. Mitchison knows how to make it fall across ''us''. She has, as it were by miracle, got back into the air and mood of the time she writes about: she creates, and recreates. The splendor and the mystery come easy to her.
** [[Gerald Gould]], {{cite book|title=The English Novel of To-day|publisher=John Castle|year=1924|isbn=0836956974|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=O1kyvwEACAAJ&amp;pg=PA157|page=157}}

* By all means read Naomi Mitchison's ''The Corn King and the Spring Queen''. It's an enormous volume not much shorter than [[Hervey Allen|Anthony Adverse]], and deals in the most vivid and convincing detail with a [[barbarian]] girl (who incidentally works causal [[magic (supernatural)|magic]] now and then), all her family and friends, a Spartan girl et al., and their experiences in Rome, Sparta, Alexandria and the barbarian hinterlands. The thing is as good, almost, as a real tour of the places she tells about. You have the feeling of actually having lived in Sparta and Alexandria...It's well worth reading just for the experience.
** [[C. L. Moore]], Letter to [[H. P. Lovecraft]],  27 May 1935. Quoted in '' H.P. Lovecraft: Letters to C. L. Moore and Others'', edited by S. T. Joshi and David E. Schultz.  Hippocampus Press, 2017 ( p.41).

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}
* {{commons category-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Mitchison, Naomi}}
[[Category:1897 births]]
[[Category:1999 deaths]]
[[Category:Historical novelists]]
[[Category:Novelists from Scotland]]
[[Category:Non-fiction authors from Scotland]]
[[Category:Journalists from Scotland]]
[[Category:People from Edinburgh]]
[[Category:Playwrights from Scotland]]
[[Category:Socialist feminists]]
[[Category:Socialists]] 
[[Category:Women authors from Scotland]]
[[Category:Science fiction authors from the United Kingdom]]
[[Category:Short story writers from Scotland]]
[[Category:Cultural critics]]
[[Category:Historians from Scotland]] 
[[Category:Autobiographers from Scotland]]
[[Category:Essayists from Scotland]]
[[Category:Memoirists from Scotland]]
[[Category:Travel writers]] 
[[Category:Political authors from Scotland]]
[[Category:University of Oxford alumni]]
[[Category:Centenarians]]</text>
      <sha1>6sea1izll5oaz6m36ifcr0mbjvc880e</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Template:Spider-Man</title>
    <ns>10</ns>
    <id>288592</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964988</id>
      <parentid>3958576</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:10:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Iago PUC</username>
        <id>2458636</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964988</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4381" sha1="j7yw4rbk0s5t6x4qp5oilrgy0u7arof" xml:space="preserve">&lt;noinclude&gt;{{italic title}}{{Wikipedia|Template:Spider-Man}}&lt;/noinclude&gt;{{clear}}
{|style=&quot;margin:1em auto; width:800px;background-color:#af2531;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot;
|-
|style=&quot;background:#1b4e93;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=center valign=middle colspan=4 height=45px|[[File:Spider-Man video game series logo.png|100px|center]]
|-
|style=&quot;background:#ffca00;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; rowspan=4 align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:blue;&quot;&gt;'''&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;Feature&amp;nbsp;films&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;'''&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;2002&amp;nbsp;film&amp;nbsp;series&amp;nbsp;'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; colspan=2|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;&amp;nbsp; [[File:Spider-Man-Logo.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man (2002 film)]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2002)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:Spider-Man 2-Logo.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man 2]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2004)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:Spider-Man 3-Logo.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man 3]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2007)&lt;/small&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|-
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;'''&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;2012&amp;nbsp;film&amp;nbsp;series&amp;nbsp;'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; colspan=2|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;&amp;nbsp; [[File:The amazing Spider-Man.svg|100px|link=The Amazing Spider-Man (2012 film)]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2012)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:The-amazing-Spider-Man-2-logo.svg|100px|link=The Amazing Spider-Man 2]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2014)&lt;/small&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|-
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;'''[[File:Marvel Cinematic Universe.png|100px|link=Template:Marvel Cinematic Universe]]'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; colspan=2|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;&amp;nbsp; [[File:Spider-man-homecoming-logo.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man: Homecoming]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2017)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:Spider-man-far-from-home.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man: Far from Home]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2019)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:Spider Man No Way Home Logo.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man: No Way Home]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2021)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:Spider Man Brand New Day Logo.svg|100px|link=Spider-Man: Brand New Day]]&lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2026)&lt;/small&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|-
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;'''[[File:Spider-Verse logo.png|100px|link=Template:Spider-Verse]]'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; colspan=2|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;&amp;nbsp; [[File:Spider-Man ITSV.png|100px|link=Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2018)&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' [[File:Spider-Man Across the Spider-Verse logo.webp|100px|link=Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse]] &lt;small&gt;&amp;nbsp;(2023)&lt;/small&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|-
|style=&quot;background:#ffca00;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:blue;&quot;&gt;'''&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;Television&amp;nbsp;series&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; colspan=3|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;&amp;nbsp; ''[[Spider-Man: The Animated Series]]'' '''·''' ''[[The Spectacular Spider-Man (TV series)|The Spectacular Spider-Man]]'' '''·''' ''[[Ultimate Spider-Man (TV series)|Ultimate Spider-Man]]'' '''·''' ''[[Spider-Man (2017 TV series)|Marvel's Spider-Man]]'' '''·''' ''[[Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man]]''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt; '''·''' ''[[Spider-Noir]]''
|-
|style=&quot;background:#ffca00;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; align=right|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:blue;&quot;&gt;'''&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;Video&amp;nbsp;games&amp;nbsp;&amp;nbsp;'''&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/small&gt;
|style=&quot;background:blue;color:var(--color-base-fixed,#202122);&quot; colspan=3|&lt;small&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;color:yellow;&quot;&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/span&gt;''[[Ultimate Spider-Man (video game)|Ultimate Spider-Man]]'' '''·''' ''[[Spider-Man: Friend or Foe]]'' '''·''' ''[[Spider-Man: Web of Shadows]]'' '''·''' ''[[Spider-Man (2018 video game)|Marvel's Spider-Man]]'' '''·''' ''[[Spider-Man 2 (2023 video game)|Marvel's Spider-Man 2]]''&lt;/small&gt;
|}&lt;noinclude&gt;[[Category:Marvel Comics navigational templates]]&lt;/noinclude&gt;</text>
      <sha1>j7yw4rbk0s5t6x4qp5oilrgy0u7arof</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>DC x Sonic the Hedgehog</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>292899</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964907</id>
      <parentid>3964060</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:43:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Iago PUC</username>
        <id>2458636</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Issue #2 */</comment>
      <origin>3964907</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="11214" sha1="b780qviy8qaimk9dziaio1ytiuzhrzh" xml:space="preserve">{{Stub}}
'''''[[w:DC x Sonic the Hedgehog|DC x Sonic the Hedgehog]]''''' is an ongoing comic book series, published by [[DC Comics]], and writen by [[w:Ian Flynn|Ian Flynn]]. It is a crossover between the ''Sonic the Hedgehog'' series with the DC Universe. The first miniseries &quot;Chaos Crisis&quot; was released in 2025, and follows Sonic and his friends as they team up with the Justice League to defeat the New God Darkseid, and stop him from obtaining the Chaos Emeralds. The second miniseries &quot;Metal Legion&quot; is scheduled for release in 2026.

==''Chaos Crisis''==
===Issue #1: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part One&quot;===
:'''Flash''': Krakkl? What are you doing here?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': You've got the wrong guy. Still, I like your hustle!
:'''Flash''': Sorry! Guess you're one of the locals, huh? Hang back! I'll handle the Parademons.
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': That's adorable. You can help out if you can keep up!
:'''Flash''': Listen, kid. I'm the '''''Flash'''''... I'm &quot;speed&quot; personified!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Then I am &quot;speed&quot; perfected!
----
:'''Superman''': We're the Justice League, heroes from another dimension. I'm Superman, protector of truth, justice, and better tomorrow. Joining me are Wonder Woman, princess of Themyscira.
:'''Wonder Woman''': A pleasure.
:'''Superman''': John Stewart of the Green Lantern Corps.
:'''Green Lantern''': Hi.
:'''Superman''': Flash, the protector of Central City.
:'''Flash''': And fastest man alive!
:'''Superman''': Cyborg, who enabled us to reach your world.
:'''Cyborg''': Sorry this isn't under better circumstances.
:'''Superman''': And Batman, protector of Gotham City. ''(Batman remains coldly silent)''
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Cool. I'm Sonic the Hedgehog. The real fastest thing alive. Me and my friends aren't organized like you guys. We just take life as it comes and help anyone who needs it. Right here we have my little bro and resident genius, Tails.
:'''Miles &quot;Tails&quot; Prower''': Hi!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': My long-term bestie, Amy.
:'''Amy Rose''': Thank you all for your help!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Knuckles, the toughest guy i know.
:'''Knuckles the Echidna''': You got that right.
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Silver, a hero from the future.
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''': A pleasure to work with you.
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': And Shadow, who says he's the &quot;Ultimate Life Form&quot;.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': ''(coldly annoyed)'' Humph.
----
:'''Batman''': Who was it?
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': What?
:'''Batman''': The one you couldn't protect. The one you watched die in front of you.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': How would you...?
:'''Batman''': For me, it was my parents. I was too young, too weak, to do anything. That pain, that anger, never leaves you. I see it in you, too.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': ...Her name was Maria. She was gunned down by the military while trying to keep me safe. Me. The Ultimate Life Form.
:'''Batman''': I swore to never let it happen again. To protect the city my parents loved, to protect their world, I will use every advantage at my disposal. That includes the Justice League. You're a valuable asset in stopping Darkseid. Likewise, we'd be valuable to you.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': I see. Humph. You better be worth the trouble.
----
:'''Wonder Woman''': Your car can fly?
:'''Amy Rose''': That's nothing! You can fly!
:'''Wonder Woman''': There's something to be said for piloting. I love flying in my invisible jet, too.
:'''Amy Rose''': You have an ''invisible '''jet'''?!''

===Issue #2: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Two&quot;===
:'''Darkseid''': DeSaad. Report.
:'''DeSaad''': A thousand apologies, Lord Darkseid! The search for the Chaos Emeralds is ongoing!
:'''Darkseid''': You directed me to one. What is the delay with the others?
:'''DeSaad''': It's the nature of their power, my lord! It's chaotic, unruly. It's almost as if they're actively trying to hide from Father Box.
:'''Darkseid''': The Justice League has arrived on this world, and they will undoubtedly complicate matters. Send my elite warriors to scour the globe. Leave no stone unturned, no structure standing. Burn this world to its foundation and sift through the ashes. I shall apply this to the Dimensional Engine and see if it is truly worth the effort.
----
:'''Dr. Eggman''': Sonic! I imagine you're already embroiled in confronting this new, interdimensional invading force?
:'''Flash''': I'm going to take a wild guess and say that's your nemesis?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Got it in one. Dr. Eggman is mad, mechanical genius out to conquer the world.
:'''Flash''': Bald, too. Superman has one of those back home.
:'''Dr. Eggman''': Don't start with me, rodent! I'm already here against my better judgment! But a threat of this magnitude necessitates extraordinary measures. I'll get you up to that grotesque flying face! You and your costumed compatriots will handle the rest!
:'''Flash''': I dunno, blue. Can we trust him?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Eh, for the short term. He stands to lose as much as the rest of us! So let's round up everyone... and go wipe our feet on Darkseid's face!
----
:'''Flash''': Found the Emerald and Darkseid! Faster than Sonic could, might I add! Converge on my location!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': You just got lucky I went the other way!
:'''Flash''': Cope, little man.
:'''Darkseid''': I will give your world credit for one thing. You have ''tenacity''. ''(Superman flies in, tanking one of Darkseid's Omega Beams)''
:'''Superman''': ''(to Sonic and Flash)'' You both need to pick up the pace.
:'''Flash''': Truce?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Truce.

===Issue #3: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Three&quot;===
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''': In brightest day...
:'''Tomar-re''', '''Ch'p''', and '''Kilowog''': In blackest night... No evil shall escape our sight!
:'''Everyone''', including '''Sinestro''': Let those who worship evil's might...
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''', '''Tomar-re''', '''Ch'p''', and '''Kilowog''': '''''Beware our power! Green Lanterns' light!'''''
''[they form a massive hammer construct as Sinestro watches in disbelief]''
----
''[Supergirl and Hawgirl are aided by a Wonder Woman-suited Amy in fighting Gorilla Grodd's army]''
:'''Gorilla Captain''': Charge! She's just one hedgehog!
:'''Supergirl''': And she's worth a hundred of you!
----
:'''Reverse-Flash''': I'm the fastest man alive. Unchallenged, now. And you'll never retrieve your precious... ''[realizes the Emerald he was holding has been replaced with a crumpled soda can]'' Wait! When did—?!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': ''[tossing the Emerald in one hand]'' Oh, sorry, did I move too fast for you to see? Let's try again. Don't blink!
''[Sonic bombards Reverse-Flash with rapid-fire Spin Dash]''

===Issue #4: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Four&quot;===
''[after Wonder Woman helps Blaze defeat Stompa, Mad Harriet and their Parademon troops in the Water Palace]''
:'''Wonder Woman''': That should buy us a moment's peace. I am princess Diana of Themyshira and a visitor to this world.
:'''Blaze the Cat''': Thank you. I am Blaze, imperial princess of the Sol Empire and likewise a visitor here. I could not sit idly by as invaders threatened my friends or their homes. Those villains were after this...
:'''Wonder Woman''': A Chaos Emerald. My allies are searching for them. We hope to use their power to drive the evil from this world and return Sonic and many of his friends home. Will you part with it?
:'''Blaze the Cat''': Were you anyone else in any other circumstance, no. But I see your valor and nature clearly. First we should ensure these threats are dealt with.
:'''Wonder Woman''': Then let us rejoin the battle!
----
''(during a fight against Granny Goodness, a group of Wisps merge with Green Lantern's Power Ring via Hyper-go-on)''
:'''Green Lantern''': From across the stars, born from one mother, they gift their powers to another. So let evil now discover, the unmatched might—of '''all colors!'''
''(he unleashes the Final Color Blaster on Granny, defeating her)''

===Issue #5: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Five&quot;===
:'''Amy Rose''': ...and everyone on Themyscira is amazing! I didn't get to spend too much time there, but we all immediately bonded, and I'm so jealous of your entire extended sisterhood!
:'''Wonder Woman''': You are one of us now. No matter how far you go, the Amazons are with you in spirit.
:'''Amy Rose''': ''(squeals happily)''
:'''The Flash''': ...so I just ran over their heads, grabbed the conch and the Emerald, and left!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': BWA-HA-HA! And what did Zavok do?
:'''The Flash''': I mean.. what could he do?
----
''[before the final battle with Darkseid]''
:'''Wonder Woman''': Let's go. For all worlds! For all peoples!
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''': For the future of everyone!

----
''[right before he is hit by Darkseid's Omega Beams, Sonic absorbs the Chaos Emeralds, transforming into Super Sonic]''
:'''Super Sonic''': I'll admit it — that stung a bit, ''Backseid''! Tell me if you feel ''this''?
''[Sonic zooms in, kicking Darkseid, before getting a headbutt in retaliation]''
:'''Darkseid''': The barest itch.
:'''Super Sonic''': ''(unscratched)'' A hit like that... you're a featherweight god, huh?

==''Metal Legion''==
{{center/s}}
'''Introduction:'''&lt;br/&gt; ''The worlds of the Justice League and Sonic the Hedgehog have been linked! Massive gateways allow free travel between the worlds, leading to... '''The Wonderful'''... '''The Worrisome'''... And '''The Weird!'''''
{{center/e}}
===Issue #1===
''(at Cream's house, Superman introduces her to Supergirl and Krypto)''
:'''Supergirl''': Hey, kid. Superman's told me a lot about your world.
:'''Cream the Rabbit''': It's a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Supergirl. My name is Cream and this is my best friend, Cheese. Welcome to our planet!
:'''Cheese''': Chao-Chao!
''(Supergirl looks at Cream lovingly, and gives her a bear hug)''
:'''Supergirl''': YOU ARE THE CUTEST LITTLE GIRL EVER!
:'''Cream the Rabbit''': HEE-HEE!
:'''Supergirl''': Kal? I'm done with Earth. I'm staying here now.
:'''Superman''': You say that and you haven't even tried her mother's baking yet!
:'''Knuckles the Echidna''': Might as well eat it, since you dragged me out here...

===Issue #2===
''(Rouge is with Catwoman in her penthouse)''
:'''Rouge the Bat''': ...and then he told me '''everything'''! I trust Eggman was just as easy?
:'''Catwoman''': He thinks he's so suave. All I had to do was smile and nod and he gave me '''everything'''. Honestly, with the egos and infighting, I'd say everything will play out just fine on its own.
:'''Rouge the Bat''': Now, now! The Justice League hired us to spy on the bad guys. The least we can do is compile an intel report before celebrating. 
:'''Catwoman''': My, my... professional '''and''' devious. A dangerous combination.
:'''Rouge the Bat''': Mm-hmm. Keep that in mind. Although in this case, I think co-think core operation is more beneficial than competition.
:'''Catwoman''': Cheers, sister!

===Issue #3===

===Issue #4===

===Issue #5===

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Sonic the Hedgehog}}
{{DC Comics}}

[[Category:2025]]
[[Category:Comics]]
[[Category:Comics based on Sonic the Hedgehog]]
[[Category:DC Comics]]
[[Category:Sonic the Hedgehog]]
[[Category:Crossover comics]]</text>
      <sha1>b780qviy8qaimk9dziaio1ytiuzhrzh</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964920</id>
      <parentid>3964907</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:54:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Iago PUC</username>
        <id>2458636</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964920</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="11202" sha1="gv6cqrznnkppjl4eoe245a2a2f8wsqw" xml:space="preserve">{{Stub}}
'''''[[w:DC x Sonic the Hedgehog|DC x Sonic the Hedgehog]]''''' is an ongoing comic book series, published by [[DC Comics]], and writen by [[w:Ian Flynn|Ian Flynn]]. It is a crossover between the ''Sonic the Hedgehog'' series with the DC Universe. The first miniseries &quot;Chaos Crisis&quot; was released in 2025, and follows Sonic and his friends as they team up with the Justice League to defeat the New God Darkseid, and stop him from obtaining the Chaos Emeralds. The second miniseries &quot;Metal Legion&quot; was released in 2026.

==''Chaos Crisis''==
===Issue #1: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part One&quot;===
:'''Flash''': Krakkl? What are you doing here?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': You've got the wrong guy. Still, I like your hustle!
:'''Flash''': Sorry! Guess you're one of the locals, huh? Hang back! I'll handle the Parademons.
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': That's adorable. You can help out if you can keep up!
:'''Flash''': Listen, kid. I'm the '''''Flash'''''... I'm &quot;speed&quot; personified!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Then I am &quot;speed&quot; perfected!
----
:'''Superman''': We're the Justice League, heroes from another dimension. I'm Superman, protector of truth, justice, and better tomorrow. Joining me are Wonder Woman, princess of Themyscira.
:'''Wonder Woman''': A pleasure.
:'''Superman''': John Stewart of the Green Lantern Corps.
:'''Green Lantern''': Hi.
:'''Superman''': Flash, the protector of Central City.
:'''Flash''': And fastest man alive!
:'''Superman''': Cyborg, who enabled us to reach your world.
:'''Cyborg''': Sorry this isn't under better circumstances.
:'''Superman''': And Batman, protector of Gotham City. ''(Batman remains coldly silent)''
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Cool. I'm Sonic the Hedgehog. The real fastest thing alive. Me and my friends aren't organized like you guys. We just take life as it comes and help anyone who needs it. Right here we have my little bro and resident genius, Tails.
:'''Miles &quot;Tails&quot; Prower''': Hi!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': My long-term bestie, Amy.
:'''Amy Rose''': Thank you all for your help!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Knuckles, the toughest guy i know.
:'''Knuckles the Echidna''': You got that right.
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Silver, a hero from the future.
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''': A pleasure to work with you.
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': And Shadow, who says he's the &quot;Ultimate Life Form&quot;.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': ''(coldly annoyed)'' Humph.
----
:'''Batman''': Who was it?
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': What?
:'''Batman''': The one you couldn't protect. The one you watched die in front of you.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': How would you...?
:'''Batman''': For me, it was my parents. I was too young, too weak, to do anything. That pain, that anger, never leaves you. I see it in you, too.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': ...Her name was Maria. She was gunned down by the military while trying to keep me safe. Me. The Ultimate Life Form.
:'''Batman''': I swore to never let it happen again. To protect the city my parents loved, to protect their world, I will use every advantage at my disposal. That includes the Justice League. You're a valuable asset in stopping Darkseid. Likewise, we'd be valuable to you.
:'''Shadow the Hedgehog''': I see. Humph. You better be worth the trouble.
----
:'''Wonder Woman''': Your car can fly?
:'''Amy Rose''': That's nothing! You can fly!
:'''Wonder Woman''': There's something to be said for piloting. I love flying in my invisible jet, too.
:'''Amy Rose''': You have an ''invisible '''jet'''?!''

===Issue #2: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Two&quot;===
:'''Darkseid''': DeSaad. Report.
:'''DeSaad''': A thousand apologies, Lord Darkseid! The search for the Chaos Emeralds is ongoing!
:'''Darkseid''': You directed me to one. What is the delay with the others?
:'''DeSaad''': It's the nature of their power, my lord! It's chaotic, unruly. It's almost as if they're actively trying to hide from Father Box.
:'''Darkseid''': The Justice League has arrived on this world, and they will undoubtedly complicate matters. Send my elite warriors to scour the globe. Leave no stone unturned, no structure standing. Burn this world to its foundation and sift through the ashes. I shall apply this to the Dimensional Engine and see if it is truly worth the effort.
----
:'''Dr. Eggman''': Sonic! I imagine you're already embroiled in confronting this new, interdimensional invading force?
:'''Flash''': I'm going to take a wild guess and say that's your nemesis?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Got it in one. Dr. Eggman is mad, mechanical genius out to conquer the world.
:'''Flash''': Bald, too. Superman has one of those back home.
:'''Dr. Eggman''': Don't start with me, rodent! I'm already here against my better judgment! But a threat of this magnitude necessitates extraordinary measures. I'll get you up to that grotesque flying face! You and your costumed compatriots will handle the rest!
:'''Flash''': I dunno, blue. Can we trust him?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Eh, for the short term. He stands to lose as much as the rest of us! So let's round up everyone... and go wipe our feet on Darkseid's face!
----
:'''Flash''': Found the Emerald and Darkseid! Faster than Sonic could, might I add! Converge on my location!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': You just got lucky I went the other way!
:'''Flash''': Cope, little man.
:'''Darkseid''': I will give your world credit for one thing. You have ''tenacity''. ''(Superman flies in, tanking one of Darkseid's Omega Beams)''
:'''Superman''': ''(to Sonic and Flash)'' You both need to pick up the pace.
:'''Flash''': Truce?
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': Truce.

===Issue #3: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Three&quot;===
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''': In brightest day...
:'''Tomar-re''', '''Ch'p''', and '''Kilowog''': In blackest night... No evil shall escape our sight!
:'''Everyone''', including '''Sinestro''': Let those who worship evil's might...
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''', '''Tomar-re''', '''Ch'p''', and '''Kilowog''': '''''Beware our power! Green Lanterns' light!'''''
''[they form a massive hammer construct as Sinestro watches in disbelief]''
----
''[Supergirl and Hawgirl are aided by a Wonder Woman-suited Amy in fighting Gorilla Grodd's army]''
:'''Gorilla Captain''': Charge! She's just one hedgehog!
:'''Supergirl''': And she's worth a hundred of you!
----
:'''Reverse-Flash''': I'm the fastest man alive. Unchallenged, now. And you'll never retrieve your precious... ''[realizes the Emerald he was holding has been replaced with a crumpled soda can]'' Wait! When did—?!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': ''[tossing the Emerald in one hand]'' Oh, sorry, did I move too fast for you to see? Let's try again. Don't blink!
''[Sonic bombards Reverse-Flash with rapid-fire Spin Dash]''

===Issue #4: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Four&quot;===
''[after Wonder Woman helps Blaze defeat Stompa, Mad Harriet and their Parademon troops in the Water Palace]''
:'''Wonder Woman''': That should buy us a moment's peace. I am princess Diana of Themyshira and a visitor to this world.
:'''Blaze the Cat''': Thank you. I am Blaze, imperial princess of the Sol Empire and likewise a visitor here. I could not sit idly by as invaders threatened my friends or their homes. Those villains were after this...
:'''Wonder Woman''': A Chaos Emerald. My allies are searching for them. We hope to use their power to drive the evil from this world and return Sonic and many of his friends home. Will you part with it?
:'''Blaze the Cat''': Were you anyone else in any other circumstance, no. But I see your valor and nature clearly. First we should ensure these threats are dealt with.
:'''Wonder Woman''': Then let us rejoin the battle!
----
''(during a fight against Granny Goodness, a group of Wisps merge with Green Lantern's Power Ring via Hyper-go-on)''
:'''Green Lantern''': From across the stars, born from one mother, they gift their powers to another. So let evil now discover, the unmatched might—of '''all colors!'''
''(he unleashes the Final Color Blaster on Granny, defeating her)''

===Issue #5: &quot;Chaos Crisis, Part Five&quot;===
:'''Amy Rose''': ...and everyone on Themyscira is amazing! I didn't get to spend too much time there, but we all immediately bonded, and I'm so jealous of your entire extended sisterhood!
:'''Wonder Woman''': You are one of us now. No matter how far you go, the Amazons are with you in spirit.
:'''Amy Rose''': ''(squeals happily)''
:'''The Flash''': ...so I just ran over their heads, grabbed the conch and the Emerald, and left!
:'''Sonic the Hedgehog''': BWA-HA-HA! And what did Zavok do?
:'''The Flash''': I mean.. what could he do?
----
''[before the final battle with Darkseid]''
:'''Wonder Woman''': Let's go. For all worlds! For all peoples!
:'''Silver the Hedgehog''': For the future of everyone!

----
''[right before he is hit by Darkseid's Omega Beams, Sonic absorbs the Chaos Emeralds, transforming into Super Sonic]''
:'''Super Sonic''': I'll admit it — that stung a bit, ''Backseid''! Tell me if you feel ''this''?
''[Sonic zooms in, kicking Darkseid, before getting a headbutt in retaliation]''
:'''Darkseid''': The barest itch.
:'''Super Sonic''': ''(unscratched)'' A hit like that... you're a featherweight god, huh?

==''Metal Legion''==
{{center/s}}
'''Introduction:'''&lt;br/&gt; ''The worlds of the Justice League and Sonic the Hedgehog have been linked! Massive gateways allow free travel between the worlds, leading to... '''The Wonderful'''... '''The Worrisome'''... And '''The Weird!'''''
{{center/e}}
===Issue #1===
''(at Cream's house, Superman introduces her to Supergirl and Krypto)''
:'''Supergirl''': Hey, kid. Superman's told me a lot about your world.
:'''Cream the Rabbit''': It's a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Supergirl. My name is Cream and this is my best friend, Cheese. Welcome to our planet!
:'''Cheese''': Chao-Chao!
''(Supergirl looks at Cream lovingly, and gives her a bear hug)''
:'''Supergirl''': YOU ARE THE CUTEST LITTLE GIRL EVER!
:'''Cream the Rabbit''': HEE-HEE!
:'''Supergirl''': Kal? I'm done with Earth. I'm staying here now.
:'''Superman''': You say that and you haven't even tried her mother's baking yet!
:'''Knuckles the Echidna''': Might as well eat it, since you dragged me out here...

===Issue #2===
''(Rouge is with Catwoman in her penthouse)''
:'''Rouge the Bat''': ...and then he told me '''everything'''! I trust Eggman was just as easy?
:'''Catwoman''': He thinks he's so suave. All I had to do was smile and nod and he gave me '''everything'''. Honestly, with the egos and infighting, I'd say everything will play out just fine on its own.
:'''Rouge the Bat''': Now, now! The Justice League hired us to spy on the bad guys. The least we can do is compile an intel report before celebrating. 
:'''Catwoman''': My, my... professional '''and''' devious. A dangerous combination.
:'''Rouge the Bat''': Mm-hmm. Keep that in mind. Although in this case, I think co-think core operation is more beneficial than competition.
:'''Catwoman''': Cheers, sister!

===Issue #3===

===Issue #4===

===Issue #5===

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Sonic the Hedgehog}}
{{DC Comics}}

[[Category:2025]]
[[Category:Comics]]
[[Category:Comics based on Sonic the Hedgehog]]
[[Category:DC Comics]]
[[Category:Sonic the Hedgehog]]
[[Category:Crossover comics]]</text>
      <sha1>gv6cqrznnkppjl4eoe245a2a2f8wsqw</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Alex Otti</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>295657</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965082</id>
      <parentid>3810140</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:05:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Obasi Ogbeyialu Precious</username>
        <id>3350108</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>&quot;Added two ew quotith source citation from Governor Otti's inauguration speech (Abia State Government), reused reference for second quote</comment>
      <origin>3965082</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2639" sha1="r6w3xz0d0d1sxkvbnv6cg64dadg2tev" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Alex Otti|Alex Chioma Otti]]''' OFR (born 18 February 1965) is a Nigerian economist, banker, investor, philanthropist, and politician, serving as the current Governor of Abia State in Nigeria.

== Quotes ==
* The present and future of Abia depend on the quality of education we provide for our children. We will intentionally prepare our citizens to be skilled participants in the global village, where science, technology, and mathematics are used as productive tools for work and play.
** &lt;ref&gt;[https://x.com/alexottiofr/status/1636335660540780544 Alex otti talks about the future of Abia State]&lt;/ref&gt;

* Things may not go exactly as we wish but even then, we have a responsibility to step out with hope, doing our best each day to pursue the outcomes we seek for ourselves and our loved ones. Hope must override despair and nothing should distract us from giving our all to achieve the goals that we have carefully laid out in the weeks and days leading to this remarkable day. I do not possess the power to predict the future but I know one thing for sure: victory ultimately goes to the one who never gave up.
** &lt;ref&gt;[https://x.com/alexottiofr/status/1874587736646275365?lang=en Alex Otti speaks on new year, new opportunities]&lt;/ref&gt;

* We strive valiantly but again and again, we come short, not because we so desire but because it is the nature of human endeavours. Our modest success in the last one year has come from waking up with new enthusiasm each morning, believing that we shall achieve better outcomes in the new day, having learnt from the mistakes of yesterday.
** &lt;ref&gt;[https://x.com/alexottiofr/status/1795805960167927994 Alex Otti talks about his one year in office]&lt;/ref&gt;

* Until I’m no more, I will continue to remember the outpouring of emotion and pure joy that marked the announcement of our victory on the 22nd of March. It will continue to inspire me to serve the people of Abia and to strive to meet their high expectations of me as their Governor and Chief Servant.
** &lt;ref name=&quot;rebuild2023&quot;&gt;[https://www.alexotti.com/a-time-to-rebuild-2/ A Time to Rebuild: Inauguration Speech of Governor Alex Otti, Abia State Government]&lt;/ref&gt;

* The Deputy Governor, Engr Ikechukwu Emetu, and I, together with our team, are fully ready to bequeath to our successors a far better Abia State than the one we have inherited today.
** &lt;ref name=&quot;rebuild2023&quot; /&gt;

==References==
{{reflist}}

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Otti, Alex}}
[[Category:Economists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Women politicians in Nigeria]]
[[Category:Philanthropists]]
[[Category:1965 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>r6w3xz0d0d1sxkvbnv6cg64dadg2tev</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965085</id>
      <parentid>3965082</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:32:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Obasi Ogbeyialu Precious</username>
        <id>3350108</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added two more quotes with source citations to the Quotes section.</comment>
      <origin>3965085</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3014" sha1="nnic7vgpsf8n6ppnqn8swpki4ry9sti" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Alex Otti|Alex Chioma Otti]]''' OFR (born 18 February 1965) is a Nigerian economist, banker, investor, philanthropist, and politician, serving as the current Governor of Abia State in Nigeria.

== Quotes ==
* The present and future of Abia depend on the quality of education we provide for our children. We will intentionally prepare our citizens to be skilled participants in the global village, where science, technology, and mathematics are used as productive tools for work and play.
** &lt;ref&gt;[https://x.com/alexottiofr/status/1636335660540780544 Alex otti talks about the future of Abia State]&lt;/ref&gt;

* Things may not go exactly as we wish but even then, we have a responsibility to step out with hope, doing our best each day to pursue the outcomes we seek for ourselves and our loved ones. Hope must override despair and nothing should distract us from giving our all to achieve the goals that we have carefully laid out in the weeks and days leading to this remarkable day. I do not possess the power to predict the future but I know one thing for sure: victory ultimately goes to the one who never gave up.
** &lt;ref&gt;[https://x.com/alexottiofr/status/1874587736646275365?lang=en Alex Otti speaks on new year, new opportunities]&lt;/ref&gt;

* We strive valiantly but again and again, we come short, not because we so desire but because it is the nature of human endeavours. Our modest success in the last one year has come from waking up with new enthusiasm each morning, believing that we shall achieve better outcomes in the new day, having learnt from the mistakes of yesterday.
** &lt;ref&gt;[https://x.com/alexottiofr/status/1795805960167927994 Alex Otti talks about his one year in office]&lt;/ref&gt;

* Until I’m no more, I will continue to remember the outpouring of emotion and pure joy that marked the announcement of our victory on the 22nd of March. It will continue to inspire me to serve the people of Abia and to strive to meet their high expectations of me as their Governor and Chief Servant.
** &lt;ref name=&quot;rebuild2023&quot;&gt;[https://www.alexotti.com/a-time-to-rebuild-2/ A Time to Rebuild: Inauguration Speech of Governor Alex Otti, Abia State Government]&lt;/ref&gt;

* The Deputy Governor, Engr Ikechukwu Emetu, and I, together with our team, are fully ready to bequeath to our successors a far better Abia State than the one we have inherited today.
** &lt;ref name=&quot;rebuild2023&quot; /&gt;

* I must thank INEC, especially those her officers, who stood firm to their conviction during the elections, to make our votes count.
** &lt;ref name=&quot;rebuild2023&quot; /&gt;

* Finally, today is the day all well-meaning citizens of Abia, and all people of goodwill the world over have been waiting for. We therefore rejoice and we are truly glad in it. 
**  &lt;ref name=&quot;rebuild2023&quot; /&gt;
==References==
{{reflist}}

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Otti, Alex}}
[[Category:Economists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Women politicians in Nigeria]]
[[Category:Philanthropists]]
[[Category:1965 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>nnic7vgpsf8n6ppnqn8swpki4ry9sti</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Belinda Bwiza</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>296251</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964852</id>
      <parentid>3822246</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:39:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Staryu</username>
        <id>3148445</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Grammar</comment>
      <origin>3964852</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5206" sha1="64gl9aaffsgod6zuix8s8s3nfj3voar" xml:space="preserve">{{people-cleanup}}
[[Belinda Bwiza]] is a [[Rwanda|Rwandan]] agriculture enthusiast who is an executive secretary at [https://oneacrefund.org/articles/women-senior-leadership-breaking-barrier One Acre Fund] since 2018. Belinda began her career as professional in finances and [https://www.ktpress.rw/2025/04/one-acre-fund-rwanda-staff-commemorate-the-genocide-against-tutsi/?utm_source=chatgpt.com]

{{Bio-stub}}

== Quotes ==

* We managed to supply agro-inputs-seeds and fertilisers to about 850,000 farmers and also trained them on good agricultural practices during the two seasons. Maize production has drastically increased. We also measured the impact on farmers under our programme. We realised that the farmers generated Rwf138 billion in profits. 
** [https://www.africa-press.net/rwanda/policy/one-acre-fund-rwanda-boosts-incomes-for-over-800000-farmers?utm One Acre Fund Rwanda boosts incomes for over 800,000 farmers] .  Africa- Press (May 9, 2024)
*Farmers need maize drying, storage, and milling infrastructure which we are helping them to get in collaboration with partners as part of value addition to the produce. We have a programme called ‘Tubura Harvest’ where we collect farmers’ harvests and link farmers to markets. We help farmers to also measure the moisture of maize to avoid Aflatoxin and increase their quality.
**[https://www.africa-press.net/rwanda/policy/one-acre-fund-rwanda-boosts-incomes-for-over-800000-farmers?utm One Acre Fund Rwanda boosts incomes for over 800,000 farmers] .  Africa- Press (May 9, 2024)
*there is still a need for more investment in handling post-harvest losses since farmers harvested when there were heavy rains.
**[https://www.africa-press.net/rwanda/policy/one-acre-fund-rwanda-boosts-incomes-for-over-800000-farmers?utm One Acre Fund Rwanda boosts incomes for over 800,000 farmers] .  Africa- Press (May 9, 2024)
*they are also working with the Government of Rwanda, the private sector, and other stakeholders to prepare 2025 Agriculture Season A and B.
**[https://www.africa-press.net/rwanda/policy/one-acre-fund-rwanda-boosts-incomes-for-over-800000-farmers?utm One Acre Fund Rwanda boosts incomes for over 800,000 farmers] .  Africa- Press (May 9, 2024).
*Remembering is honoring their lives and their dreams of a sustainable future and a peaceful nation. Remembering is the legacy we leave to our youth, educating them on the true history so that Genocide will never happen again. Unity is the foundation of a new Rwanda, which enables us to rise up and work together to build the Nation.
**[https://www.kigalitoday.com/kwibuka/article/kwibuka-ni-uguha-icyubahiro-ubuzima-n-inzozi-z-abatutsi-bishwe-one-acre-fund-rwanda?utm Kwibuka ni uguha icyubahiro ubuzima n’inzozi z’Abatutsi bishwe - One Acre Fund Rwanda]. Kigali Today (April 11, 2025)
*Under our farmer-facing program, we supplied agricultural input to more than 850, 000 farmers and trained them on good agricultural practices, which significantly increased the farmers’ harvest.
**[https://agri4africa.com/one-acre-fund-rwanda-boosts-the-income-for-over-850000-farmers/?utm One Acre Fund Rwanda boosts the income for over 850,000 farmers]. Agri4africa.com (July 14, 2024).
*Through 1,841 three nursery entrepreneurs, we distributed 20 million agroforestry trees to more than 766,000 farmers to continue addressing climate change-related challenges.
**[https://agri4africa.com/one-acre-fund-rwanda-boosts-the-income-for-over-850000-farmers/?utm One Acre Fund Rwanda boosts the income for over 850,000 farmers]. Agri4africa.com (July 14, 2024).
*diversity in leadership results in inclusive decision-making, which directly correlates to better organizational performance
**[https://en.webrwanda.com/2025/03/women-in-finance-rwanda-launches.html?utm Women in Finance Rwanda launches mentorship program to empower women in the financial sector #rwanda #RwOT]. WebRwanda.com (March 21,2025)
*We know that trees help generate rainfall, but we want farmers to see various benefits from them, including providing poles for planting beans, fertilizing the soil, and more.
**[https://www.kigalitoday.com/ibidukikije/ibimera/article/ingemwe-z-ibiti-miliyoni-65-zigiye-guterwa-hirya-no-hino-mu-rwanda?utm Ingemwe z’ibiti Miliyoni 65 zigiye guterwa hirya no hino mu Rwanda]. Kigali Today (26-10-2024 - 10:42' )
*''By investing in robust seed systems and providing access to quality seedlings, we are empowering them to restore degraded land, enhance biodiversity, and improve their livelihoods.''
**[https://www.ktpress.rw/2025/03/press-release-one-acre-fund-rwanda-launches-2025-tree-seed-systems-carbon-market-roundtable-to-scale-reforestation-and-climate-action/?utm PRESS RELEASE: One Acre Fund Rwanda Launches 2025 Tree Seed Systems &amp; Carbon Market Roundtable to Scale Reforestation and Climate Action]. KTPress (March 21, 2025)

== Quotes about ==

== External links ==

* [https://oneacrefund.org/articles/women-senior-leadership-breaking-barriers &quot;Women in Senior Leadership — Breaking Barriers&quot;] – Interview with Belinda Bwiza on One Acre Fund's website.
[[Category:Economists]]
[[Category:Business executives]]
[[Category:Agriculture]]
[[Category:Environmentalists]]</text>
      <sha1>64gl9aaffsgod6zuix8s8s3nfj3voar</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Simpsons/Season 37</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>296624</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965182</id>
      <parentid>3961104</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:57:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-38083-91</username>
        <id>3347250</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965182</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5897" sha1="lwa3ltcrj7lv3rntcr0jrb5p1y8u99u" xml:space="preserve">{{DISPLAYTITLE:''The Simpsons''/Season 37}}
{{The Simpsons header}}
:'''''[[w:The Simpsons|The Simpsons]]''''' (1989–present) is an American animated sitcom broadcast by the Fox Broadcasting Company created by [[Matt Groening]]. The series is a satirical depiction of American life, epitomized by the Simpson family.

===''[[w:Thrifty Ways to Thieve Your Mother|Thrifty Ways to Thieve Your Mother]]''===
:'''Marge''': I can't remember the last movie we saw in theaters. And on opening night!
:'''Homer''': Movies are back, baby!
:'''Bart''': Just think of all the chumps out there waiting three days until this movie's free on streaming.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Janet Grody''': I'm Dr. Janet Grody, creator of Snüf Total-Body Deodorant. It's for all your grossest places. Just rub it right on your butt cleft, under pouch, stink flaps...
:'''Marge''': Ah! How could they say those words on TV?
:'''Janet Grody''': ...peat bog, smuckle, stunk-tank.
:''[Homer, Bart, and Lisa are all laughing]''
:'''Marge''': Come on. Skip ad. Skip ad.
:'''Janet Grody''': Between-hatch, gunk chunnel, boob swamp, elbow crotch.
:'''Homer''': Elbow crotch. I have one of those.

===''[[w:Keep Chalm and Gary On|Keep Chalm and Gary On]]''===
:'''Bart''': The phone banning guy can't get off his phone. Ironic!
:'''Rayshelle Peyton''': Hey that is irony. Very accurate heckleing Bart.
:'''Bart''': Thank you. I love you.
:'''Rayshelle Peyton''': What?
:'''Bart''': Nothing.

===''[[w:Treehouse of Horror XXXVI|Treehouse of Horror XXXVI]]''===
:'''Krusty''': I don't care what deal you made. We got to pull the plug on this nightmare!
:'''Hal Julian''': Are you nuts?! This thing is huge! You're a smash!
:'''PA #1''': They're puking in Peoria.
:'''PA #2''': They're retching in Rochester.
:'''PA #3''': They've got PTSD in Pickstown, South Dakota!

===''[[w:Men Behaving Manly|Men Behaving Manly]]''===
:'''Ralph''': ''[floating down the river]'' I'm streaming.
:'''Greg''': Yeah, we never come back with all of them, but nature's amazing because the one that's gone is the one that should be.

===''[[w:Bad Boys... for Life?|Bad Boys... for Life?]]''===
:'''Lisa''': Mom, maybe you could tell a story about us when we were younger. 
:'''Marge''': Um, we've done that a few times. Not sure what stories are left. Maggie's first tooth, Grampa's last tooth, the time Homer thought he invented stuffed crust pizza.
:'''Homer''': I did invent it. ''[picks up a paper of Crust Insert Stuff with Pizza on it]'' I'm the Thomas Edison of stuffing things with cheese.
:'''Bart''': Including yourself.
:'''Homer''': ''[turns red in anger]'' Why you little. ''[strangles Bart]''
:'''Bart''': Your primitive strangling is no match for fireplace tongs. ''[strangles Homer with a fireplace tongs, then Homer tickles him, Homer turns his face normal, then he and Homer lays on the floor]''
:'''Homer''': We just made some memories, boy.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Bart''': I caught a frog, I caught a frog. Ooh. Where did he go?
:''[A frog is not in Bart's hand, but a frog is on Lisa's nose, causing to Lisa scream as Homer tries to pulls a frog off Lisa's nose]''
:'''Marge''': ''[offscreen]'' What's going on in there?
:'''Homer''': Boy, quit scaring your sister.

===''[[w:Bart 'N' Frink|Bart 'N' Frink]]''===
:'''Johnson Bryans''': We follow your path, teacher, but are you sure that the secret to eternal youth is shot-gunning beer and watching the Godzilla Channel until 3:00 a.m.?

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Peter Linz''': You know what might make you feel better? Making him feel worse. After all, the Buddha teaches us, &quot;It's impossible to be happy if other people are.&quot; 

===''[[w:Sashes to Sashes|Sashes to Sashes]]''===

===''[[w:The Day of the Jack-up|The Day of the Jack-up]]''===
:'''FBI profiler''': My intel confirms that Skinner is the principal of the school, and also he does in fact suck.

===''[[w:Aunt Misbehavin'|Aunt Misbehavin']]''===
:'''Dentist''': Another perfect checkup, Lisa. Next.
:'''Bart''': Hang tight, Dr K. I just got to freshen up. ''[he goes to the bathroom, puts his bag on the sink, opens his bag and grabs his packet of triple cookies, swallows an entire box of triple cookies]''
:'''Dentist''': All right. Let's see what we're working with here... ''[screaming]''
:''[at home, Homer reads off details of the statement while he's pacing]''
:'''Homer''': Four-hour teeth cleaning... ''[Bart cackles]'' Emergency whitening. Oreo exposure therapy for the hygienist. ''[stops pacing, then angrily yells at Bart]'' Do you have any idea how much your stunt cost?
:'''Bart''': Can you really put a price on that kind of comedy?
:'''Homer''': What I can do is find a punishment that fits the crime. Now you have an appointment with Dr. Homer. ''[picks up a power drill]''
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Homer''': Come on, get in there! Ghost pepper? More like Casper the friendly ghost. Oh. Now it's kicking in. ''[screaming]''

===''[[w:Guess Who's Coming to Skinner|Guess Who's Coming to Skinner]]''===

===''[[w:Parahormonal Activity|Parahormonal Activity]]''===
:'''Bart''': I'm driving to school today. How am I gonna learn not to kill people if you don't let me practice?
:''[Maggie crying]''
:'''Marge''': Maggie, Maggie, rest your voice. You're still getting over that laryngitis.
:'''Maggie''': Please, don't let Bart drive. It's too scary. He drives so wiggly and everybody honks at us and yells bad words and shows us fingers.
:''[Bart groans]''

===''[[w:The Fall Guy-Yi-Yi!|The Fall Guy-Yi-Yi!]]''===

===''[[w:Seperance|Seperance]]''===

===''[[w:Irrational Treasure|Irrational Treasure]]''===

===''[[w:Homer? A Cracker Bro?|Homer? A Cracker Bro?]]''===

===''[[w:Extreme Makeover: Homer Edition|Extreme Makeover: Homer Edition]]''===

===''[[w:Simpsley|Simpsley]]''===

==External links==
{{wikipedia|The Simpsons season 37}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Simpsons, Season 37}}
[[Category:The Simpsons seasons]]</text>
      <sha1>lwa3ltcrj7lv3rntcr0jrb5p1y8u99u</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Disney Speedstorm</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>298529</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964970</id>
      <parentid>3963706</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:47:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Voltlds</username>
        <id>780530</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964970</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3338" sha1="ogfr7hau349ghsjdiio7ucieiz0sfz2" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Disney Speedstorm}}''' is a free-to-play kart racing game developed by Gameloft Barcelona and published by Gameloft. It features various Disney and Pixar characters racing vehicles on tracks themed after the worlds of their films and franchises.

==Mickey and Friends==
===Mickey Mouse===
*Mickey Mouse is in the house!

===Minnie Mouse===
*I'm here to help!

===Donald Duck===
*''I'm'' the best driver for this job!

===Daisy Duck===
*See you in my rear-view mirror!

===Goofy===
* I can drive anything! Even a bathtub!

===Scrooge McDuck===
*Good grief!
*Let's take a dive!

==Hercules==
===Megara===
*Name's Megara.
*Well, that stinks.
*Won't say I don't like it.
*Well, what do you know?

==Monsters Inc.==
===Mike Wazowski===
*My car!
*I got everything to win right here.
*Not to brag, but I really bring out the whole package.
*This is bad.
*Deep breaths. I've got this!

===Sulley===
*You won't be disappointed.

==Toy Story==
===Jessie===
*Everybody ready to eat my dust?
*This ain't my first rodeo!
*All geared up and ready to go!
*Oh, I'm readier than ready!
*Guess close only counts in horseshoes.

===Rex===
*Ooh, I'm so conflicted!

==Lilo and Stitch==
===Stitch===
*My name, Stitch!
*Stitch Win!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*Woo! Yes! Stitch fancy now.
*Whoa! Dogaaba!
*Yes.
*Go fast!
*Ooh! Stitch go fast! Vroom!

===Lilo===
*I'm troubled.
*Guess I've messed up.

==Oswald the Lucky Rabbit==
===Oswald===
*Oh, are we gonna go or what?
*I feel like a whole new rabbit!

==Frozen==
===Anna===
*So ready for this!

==Wreck-It Ralph==
===Vanellope===
*I've got a date with destiny!
*Let's roll!
*I'm gonna win! I can feel it in my core!
*I'm here... and I'm there!
*So long!
*Piece of cake!
*Hey there, weirdo.
*You know I'm a professional racer, right?
*Let me at 'em!
*Hello, fellow racers!
*See ya, chums!
*Glitch mode!
*I rest my case!

==The Nightmare Before Christmas==
===Jack Skellington===
*Shall we frighten the competition?
*Fantastic!
*Oh, what fun this will be!
*How tragic.
*Enjoy your gifts.

==Inside Out==
===Sadness===
*Maybe I just lie down.

==Sleeping Beauty==
===Aurora===
*We'll have the happiest time.

==Cruella De Vil==
*It's &quot;De Vil,&quot; with the Capital V!
*I tell you I'm simply mad about racing.
*Thought they could outwit Cruella? Never!
*BLAST!
*Who did this?!
*WWAAAAAAHHH!!
*Oh miserable!!

==The Incredibles==

===Dash Parr===
*I'll do my best! My best is super-fast!

===Violet Parr===
*We can use our powers. Right?
*I am so ready for this!

==Moana==
*I've got this.

==TRON==
===Zuse===
*I am ready for victory!

==Big Hero 6==
===Honey Lemon===
*Whoohoo!
*Don't worry! I will ''not'' let you down.
*Excellent choice.

===Go Go Tomago===
*Looks like you need serious help.
*Try to keep up.
*Let's get this done.

==Winnie the Pooh==
===Eeyore===
*Figures.

==Rescue Rangers==
===Chip===
*We have to stay alert!

==Zootopia==
===Judy Hopps===
*Judy Hopps, ZPD! Hello!
*Oh, I am so ready for this.
*I won't let you down.
*Drive safely, everyone!

===Nick Wilde===
*Count me in.
*It's you and me, pal.
*Come on, you know you love me.

===Flash Slothmore===
*Excellent... choice.

==Cars==
===Tow Mater===
*We're gonna be good friends.
*Well, dadgum! Let's get started!

===Cruz Ramirez===
*Excellent choice.

==Mabel Tanaka==
*Come on, let's go see what's out there!

[[Category: 2023 video games]]</text>
      <sha1>ogfr7hau349ghsjdiio7ucieiz0sfz2</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964984</id>
      <parentid>3964970</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:49:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Voltlds</username>
        <id>780530</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964984</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4117" sha1="ornq710139zlh2cvgqm4ozhxsjz83zw" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Disney Speedstorm}}''' is a free-to-play kart racing game developed by Gameloft Barcelona and published by Gameloft. It features various Disney and Pixar characters racing vehicles on tracks themed after the worlds of their films and franchises.

==Mickey and Friends==
===Mickey Mouse===
*Mickey Mouse is in the house!

===Minnie Mouse===
*I'm here to help!

===Donald Duck===
*''I'm'' the best driver for this job!

===Daisy Duck===
*See you in my rear-view mirror!

===Goofy===
* I can drive anything! Even a bathtub!

===Scrooge McDuck===
*Good grief!
*Let's take a dive!
*Ho-ho-ho! I've wouldn't have missed this for all the scums in Scotland!
*And the adventure begins!
*Let's get started! Time is money!
*Ahh... A grand day for a race!
*Gold rush!
*Impressive!
*Oh! What fat luck!
*Smarter than the smarties!
*And I won in square, too!
*Ho-ho-ho! You can't go wrong with Scrooge McDuck!
*Ready when you are!
*And you can take that to the bank!

==Hercules==
===Hercules===
*This one's for you, Phil.

===Megara===
*Name's Megara.
*Well, that stinks.
*Won't say I don't like it.
*Well, what do you know?

==Monsters Inc.==
===Mike Wazowski===
*My car!
*I got everything to win right here.
*Not to brag, but I really bring out the whole package.
*This is bad.
*Deep breaths. I've got this!

===Sulley===
*You won't be disappointed.

==Toy Story==
===Woody===
*They don't call me &quot;Sheriff Speedy&quot; for nothing.
*Trust me. I'm the right toy for this job.
*Right call.
*Ha, ha! ''That'' was fun!

===Jessie===
*Everybody ready to eat my dust?
*This ain't my first rodeo!
*All geared up and ready to go!
*Oh, I'm readier than ready!
*Guess close only counts in horseshoes.
*Who's the best cowgirl in the whole west? Me!
*You betcha!
*I know just what to do!
*I call that my finest hour!

===Rex===
*Ooh, I'm so conflicted!

==Lilo and Stitch==
===Stitch===
*My name, Stitch!
*Stitch Win!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*Woo! Yes! Stitch fancy now.
*Whoa! Dogaaba!
*Yes.
*Go fast!
*Ooh! Stitch go fast! Vroom!

===Lilo===
*I'm troubled.
*Guess I've messed up.
*Follow me!
*Okay. Time to put it all together.
*Say cheese!

==Oswald the Lucky Rabbit==
===Oswald===
*Oh, are we gonna go or what?
*I feel like a whole new rabbit!

==Frozen==
===Anna===
*So ready for this!

==Wreck-It Ralph==
===Vanellope===
*I've got a date with destiny!
*Let's roll!
*I'm gonna win! I can feel it in my core!
*I'm here... and I'm there!
*So long!
*Piece of cake!
*Hey there, weirdo.
*You know I'm a professional racer, right?
*Let me at 'em!
*Hello, fellow racers!
*See ya, chums!
*Glitch mode!
*I rest my case!
*Don't worry. I've got this race wired.

==The Nightmare Before Christmas==
===Jack Skellington===
*Shall we frighten the competition?
*Fantastic!
*Oh, what fun this will be!
*How tragic.
*Enjoy your gifts.

==Inside Out==
===Sadness===
*Maybe I just lie down.

==Sleeping Beauty==
===Aurora===
*We'll have the happiest time.

==Cruella De Vil==
*It's &quot;De Vil,&quot; with the Capital V!
*I tell you I'm simply mad about racing.
*Thought they could outwit Cruella? Never!
*BLAST!
*Who did this?!
*WWAAAAAAHHH!!
*Oh miserable!!

==The Incredibles==

===Dash Parr===
*I'll do my best! My best is super-fast!

===Violet Parr===
*We can use our powers. Right?
*I am so ready for this!

==Moana==
*I've got this.

==TRON==
===Zuse===
*I am ready for victory!

==Big Hero 6==
===Honey Lemon===
*Whoohoo!
*Don't worry! I will ''not'' let you down.
*Excellent choice.

===Go Go Tomago===
*Looks like you need serious help.
*Try to keep up.
*Let's get this done.

==Winnie the Pooh==
===Eeyore===
*Figures.

==Rescue Rangers==
===Chip===
*We have to stay alert!

==Zootopia==
===Judy Hopps===
*Judy Hopps, ZPD! Hello!
*Oh, I am so ready for this.
*I won't let you down.
*Drive safely, everyone!

===Nick Wilde===
*Count me in.
*It's you and me, pal.
*Come on, you know you love me.

===Flash Slothmore===
*Excellent... choice.

==Cars==
===Tow Mater===
*We're gonna be good friends.
*Well, dadgum! Let's get started!

===Cruz Ramirez===
*Excellent choice.

==Mabel Tanaka==
*Come on, let's go see what's out there!

[[Category: 2023 video games]]</text>
      <sha1>ornq710139zlh2cvgqm4ozhxsjz83zw</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964999</id>
      <parentid>3964984</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:44:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Voltlds</username>
        <id>780530</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964999</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4391" sha1="bumxp4xm9sgqgpjrxc94gffw0sd0g25" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Disney Speedstorm}}''' is a free-to-play kart racing game developed by Gameloft Barcelona and published by Gameloft. It features various Disney and Pixar characters racing vehicles on tracks themed after the worlds of their films and franchises.

==Mickey and Friends==
===Mickey Mouse===
*Mickey Mouse is in the house!

===Minnie Mouse===
*I'm here to help!

===Donald Duck===
*''I'm'' the best driver for this job!

===Daisy Duck===
*See you in my rear-view mirror!

===Goofy===
* I can drive anything! Even a bathtub!

===Scrooge McDuck===
*Good grief!
*Let's take a dive!
*Ho-ho-ho! I've wouldn't have missed this for all the scums in Scotland!
*And the adventure begins!
*Let's get started! Time is money!
*Ahh... A grand day for a race!
*Gold rush!
*Impressive!
*Oh! What fat luck!
*Smarter than the smarties!
*And I won in square, too!
*Ho-ho-ho! You can't go wrong with Scrooge McDuck!
*Ready when you are!
*And you can take that to the bank!

==Hercules==
===Hercules===
*This one's for you, Phil.

===Megara===
*Name's Megara.
*Well, that stinks.
*Won't say I don't like it.
*Well, what do you know?

==Monsters Inc.==
===Mike Wazowski===
*My car!
*I got everything to win right here.
*Not to brag, but I really bring out the whole package.
*This is bad.
*Deep breaths. I've got this!

===Sulley===
*You won't be disappointed.

==Toy Story==
===Woody===
*They don't call me &quot;Sheriff Speedy&quot; for nothing.
*Trust me. I'm the right toy for this job.
*Right call.
*Ha, ha! ''That'' was fun!

===Jessie===
*Everybody ready to eat my dust?
*This ain't my first rodeo!
*All geared up and ready to go!
*Oh, I'm readier than ready!
*Guess close only counts in horseshoes.
*Who's the best cowgirl in the whole west? Me!
*You betcha!
*I know just what to do!
*I call that my finest hour!
*Just call me the high-ridin'-st, rootin'-tootin'-ist cowgirl of all time!
*Got any critters that need wrangling?

===Rex===
*Ooh, I'm so conflicted!

==Lilo and Stitch==
===Stitch===
*My name, Stitch!
*Stitch Win!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*Woo! Yes! Stitch fancy now.
*Whoa! Dogaaba!
*Yes.
*Go fast!
*Ooh! Stitch go fast! Vroom!

===Lilo===
*I'm troubled.
*Guess I've messed up.
*Follow me!
*Okay. Time to put it all together.
*Say cheese!

===Angel===
*Coochiboo...?

==Oswald the Lucky Rabbit==
===Oswald===
*Oh, are we gonna go or what?
*I feel like a whole new rabbit!

==Frozen==
===Anna===
*So ready for this!

==Wreck-It Ralph==
===Vanellope===
*I've got a date with destiny!
*Let's roll!
*I'm gonna win! I can feel it in my core!
*I'm here... and I'm there!
*So long!
*Piece of cake!
*Hey there, weirdo.
*You know I'm a professional racer, right?
*Let me at 'em!
*Hello, fellow racers!
*See ya, chums!
*Glitch mode!
*I rest my case!
*Don't worry. I've got this race wired.

==The Nightmare Before Christmas==
===Jack Skellington===
*Shall we frighten the competition?
*Fantastic!
*Oh, what fun this will be!
*How tragic.
*Enjoy your gifts.

==Inside Out==
===Sadness===
*Maybe I just lie down.

==Sleeping Beauty==
===Aurora===
*We'll have the happiest time.

==Cruella De Vil==
*It's &quot;De Vil,&quot; with the Capital V!
*I tell you I'm simply mad about racing.
*Thought they could outwit Cruella? Never!
*BLAST!
*Who did this?!
*WWAAAAAAHHH!!
*Oh miserable!!

==The Incredibles==
===Dash Parr===
*I'll do my best! My best is super-fast!

===Violet Parr===
*We can use our powers. Right?
*I am so ready for this!

==Moana==
===Moana===
*I won't let you down.
*I've got this.
*See ya out there!
*I come from a long line of voyagers.
*Hope the wind's with me.
*I won? I won!

==TRON==
===Zuse===
*I am ready for victory!

==Big Hero 6==
===Honey Lemon===
*Whoohoo!
*Don't worry! I will ''not'' let you down.
*Excellent choice.

===Go Go Tomago===
*Looks like you need serious help.
*Try to keep up.
*Let's get this done.

==Winnie the Pooh==
===Eeyore===
*Figures.

==Rescue Rangers==
===Chip===
*We have to stay alert!

==Zootopia==
===Judy Hopps===
*Judy Hopps, ZPD! Hello!
*Oh, I am so ready for this.
*I won't let you down.
*Drive safely, everyone!

===Nick Wilde===
*Count me in.
*It's you and me, pal.
*Come on, you know you love me.

===Flash Slothmore===
*Excellent... choice.

==Cars==
===Tow Mater===
*We're gonna be good friends.
*Well, dadgum! Let's get started!

===Cruz Ramirez===
*Excellent choice.

==Mabel Tanaka==
*Come on, let's go see what's out there!

[[Category: 2023 video games]]</text>
      <sha1>bumxp4xm9sgqgpjrxc94gffw0sd0g25</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965025</id>
      <parentid>3964999</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:34:30Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Voltlds</username>
        <id>780530</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965025</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4820" sha1="lc2i4eaiut78053bj448qahz5tca2a4" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Disney Speedstorm}}''' is a free-to-play kart racing game developed by Gameloft Barcelona and published by Gameloft. It features various Disney and Pixar characters racing vehicles on tracks themed after the worlds of their films and franchises.

==Mickey and Friends==
===Mickey Mouse===
*Mickey Mouse is in the house!

===Minnie Mouse===
*I'm here to help!

===Donald Duck===
*''I'm'' the best driver for this job!
*Heh-heh-heh!
*I'm prepared for this!
*Hurray!

===Daisy Duck===
*See you in my rear-view mirror!

===Goofy===
* I can drive anything! Even a bathtub!

===Scrooge McDuck===
*Good grief!
*Let's take a dive!
*Ho-ho-ho! I've wouldn't have missed this for all the scums in Scotland!
*And the adventure begins!
*Let's get started! Time is money!
*Ahh... A grand day for a race!
*Gold rush!
*Impressive!
*Oh! What fat luck!
*Smarter than the smarties!
*And I won in square, too!
*Ho-ho-ho! You can't go wrong with Scrooge McDuck!
*Ready when you are!
*And you can take that to the bank!

==Hercules==
===Hercules===
*This one's for you, Phil.

===Megara===
*Name's Megara.
*Well, that stinks.
*Won't say I don't like it.
*Well, what do you know?

==Monsters Inc.==
===Mike Wazowski===
*My car!
*I got everything to win right here.
*Not to brag, but I really bring out the whole package.
*This is bad.
*Deep breaths. I've got this!

===Sulley===
*You won't be disappointed.

==Toy Story==
===Woody===
*They don't call me &quot;Sheriff Speedy&quot; for nothing.
*Trust me. I'm the right toy for this job.
*Right call.
*Ha, ha! ''That'' was fun!

===Jessie===
*Everybody ready to eat my dust?
*This ain't my first rodeo!
*All geared up and ready to go!
*Oh, I'm readier than ready!
*Guess close only counts in horseshoes.
*Who's the best cowgirl in the whole west? Me!
*You betcha!
*I know just what to do!
*I call that my finest hour!
*Just call me the high-ridin'-st, rootin'-tootin'-ist cowgirl of all time!
*Got any critters that need wrangling?

===Rex===
*Ooh, I'm so conflicted!

==Lilo and Stitch==
===Stitch===
*My name, Stitch!
*Stitch Win!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*Woo! Yes! Stitch fancy now.
*Whoa! Dogaaba!
*Yes.
*Go fast!
*Ooh! Stitch go fast! Vroom!

===Lilo===
*I'm troubled.
*Guess I've messed up.
*Follow me!
*Okay. Time to put it all together.
*Say cheese!

===Angel===
*Coochiboo...?

==Oswald the Lucky Rabbit==
===Oswald===
*Oh, are we gonna go or what?
*I feel like a whole new rabbit!

==Frozen==
===Anna===
*So ready for this!

==Wreck-It Ralph==
===Vanellope===
*I've got a date with destiny!
*Let's roll!
*I'm gonna win! I can feel it in my core!
*I'm here... and I'm there!
*So long!
*Piece of cake!
*Hey there, weirdo.
*You know I'm a professional racer, right?
*Let me at 'em!
*Hello, fellow racers!
*See ya, chums!
*Glitch mode!
*I rest my case!
*Don't worry. I've got this race wired.

==The Nightmare Before Christmas==
===Jack Skellington===
*Shall we frighten the competition?
*Fantastic!
*Oh, what fun this will be!
*How tragic.
*Enjoy your gifts.

==Inside Out==
===Sadness===
*Maybe I just lie down.

==Sleeping Beauty==
===Aurora===
*We'll have the happiest time.

==Cruella De Vil==
*It's &quot;De Vil,&quot; with the Capital V!
*I tell you I'm simply mad about racing.
*Thought they could outwit Cruella? Never!
*BLAST!
*Who did this?!
*WWAAAAAAHHH!!
*Oh miserable!!

==The Incredibles==
===Dash Parr===
*I'll do my best! My best is super-fast!

===Violet Parr===
*We can use our powers. Right?
*I am so ready for this!

==Moana==
===Moana===
*I won't let you down.
*I've got this.
*See ya out there!
*I come from a long line of voyagers.
*Hope the wind's with me.
*I won? I won!

==TRON==
===Zuse===
*I am ready for victory!

==Big Hero 6==
===Hiro===
*Prepare to be amazed.
*Hope you're ready to eat my dust!
*Okay, I'll admit. I did it. That was pretty epic.

===Honey Lemon===
*Whoohoo!
*Don't worry! I will ''not'' let you down.
*Excellent choice.

===Go Go Tomago===
*Looks like you need serious help.
*Try to keep up.
*Let's get this done.

==Winnie the Pooh==
===Eeyore===
*Figures.

==Rescue Rangers==
===Chip===
*We have to stay alert!

==Zootopia==
===Judy Hopps===
*Judy Hopps, ZPD! Hello!
*Oh, I am so ready for this.
*I won't let you down.
*Drive safely, everyone.
*You can count on me.
*Got it!
*Evidence!
*I did it!
*ZPD!
*Gotcha!
*There's that one.
*See? Anyone ''can'' do anything.
*Let's show 'em what a bunny from the burrows can do!
*Here we go.
*See? Not too bad for a bunny, huh?

===Nick Wilde===
*Count me in.
*It's you and me, pal.
*Come on, you know you love me.
*Wasn't me.

===Flash Slothmore===
*Excellent... choice.

==Cars==
===Tow Mater===
*We're gonna be good friends.
*Well, dadgum! Let's get started!

===Cruz Ramirez===
*Excellent choice.

==Mabel Tanaka==
*This is gonna be great!
*Come on, let's go see what's out there!

[[Category: 2023 video games]]</text>
      <sha1>lc2i4eaiut78053bj448qahz5tca2a4</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965192</id>
      <parentid>3965025</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T05:43:00Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Voltlds</username>
        <id>780530</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965192</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5939" sha1="giqwc5hz061uo4fs5g0zhzy64pk9igt" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Disney Speedstorm}}''' is a free-to-play kart racing game developed by Gameloft Barcelona and published by Gameloft. It features various Disney and Pixar characters racing vehicles on tracks themed after the worlds of their films and franchises.

==Mickey and Friends==
===Mickey Mouse===
*Mickey Mouse is in the house!

===Minnie Mouse===
*I'm here to help!

===Donald Duck===
*''I'm'' the best driver for this job!
*Heh-heh-heh!
*I'm prepared for this!
*Hurray!
*You can't catch me!
*Ah, phooey...

===Daisy Duck===
*See you in my rear-view mirror!
*Don't worry. I do ''not'' dawdle.
*Not a problem!
*First place here I come!
*Oh, well! I had fun!
*That's me to a tee!

===Goofy===
* I can drive anything! Even a bathtub!

===Scrooge McDuck===
*Good grief!
*Let's take a dive!
*Ho-ho-ho! I've wouldn't have missed this for all the scums in Scotland!
*And the adventure begins!
*Let's get started! Time is money!
*Ahh... A grand day for a race!
*Gold rush!
*Impressive!
*Oh! What fat luck!
*Smarter than the smarties!
*And I won in square, too!
*Ho-ho-ho! You can't go wrong with Scrooge McDuck!
*Ready when you are!
*And you can take that to the bank!

==Hercules==
===Hercules===
*This one's for you, Phil.

===Megara===
*Name's Megara.
*Well, that stinks.
*Won't say I don't like it.
*Well, what do you know?

==Monsters Inc.==
===Mike Wazowski===
*My car!
*I got everything to win right here.
*Not to brag, but I really bring out the whole package.
*This is bad.
*Deep breaths. I've got this!

===Sulley===
*You won't be disappointed.

==Toy Story==
===Woody===
*They don't call me &quot;Sheriff Speedy&quot; for nothing.
*Trust me. I'm the right toy for this job.
*Right call.
*Ha, ha! ''That'' was fun!

===Buzz Lightyear===
*I can win this thing with my eyes closed!
*You came to the right Space Ranger!
*Move out!
*Let's make things interesting!
*Maximum power!
*You can always count on me!

===Jessie===
*Everybody ready to eat my dust?
*This ain't my first rodeo!
*All geared up and ready to go!
*Oh, I'm readier than ready!
*Guess close only counts in horseshoes.
*Who's the best cowgirl in the whole west? Me!
*You betcha!
*I know just what to do!
*I call that my finest hour!
*Just call me the high-ridin'-st, rootin'-tootin'-ist cowgirl of all time!
*Got any critters that need wrangling?

===Bo Peep===
*Stick with me. You'll be fine.
*Follow my lead.
*That's right. Playtime is over.

===Emperor Zurg===
*Triumph is ''all'' I do.
*Success as usual.
*This ''whole'' galaxy is mine!

===Rex===
*Ooh, I'm so conflicted!
*I don't understand!
*Losing health units.

==Lilo and Stitch==
===Stitch===
*My name, Stitch!
*Stitch Win!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*Woo! Yes! Stitch fancy now.
*Whoa! Dogaaba!
*Yes.
*Go fast!
*Ooh! Stitch go fast! Vroom!
*Okidoki!

===Lilo===
*I'm troubled.
*Guess I've messed up.
*Follow me!
*Okay. Time to put it all together.
*Say cheese!

===Angel===
*Coochiboo...?
*Heheheheh!

===Captain Gantu===
*What are your orders?
*I'll look forward to it.
*Surprise!
*Fire on sight!

==Oswald the Lucky Rabbit==
===Oswald===
*Oh, are we gonna go or what?
*I feel like a whole new rabbit!

==Frozen==
===Anna===
*So ready for this!

==Wreck-It Ralph==
===Vanellope===
*I've got a date with destiny!
*Let's roll!
*I'm gonna win! I can feel it in my core!
*I'm here... and I'm there!
*So long!
*Piece of cake!
*Hey there, weirdo.
*You know I'm a professional racer, right?
*Let me at 'em!
*Hello, fellow racers!
*See ya, chums!
*Glitch mode!
*I rest my case!
*Don't worry. I've got this race wired.

==The Nightmare Before Christmas==
===Jack Skellington===
*Shall we frighten the competition?
*Fantastic!
*Oh, what fun this will be!
*How tragic.
*Enjoy your gifts.

==Inside Out==
===Sadness===
*Maybe I just lie down.

===Fear===
*I won't let you down, I hope.
*Aaahhh! Okay...

==Sleeping Beauty==
===Aurora===
*We'll have the happiest time.

==Cruella De Vil==
*It's &quot;De Vil,&quot; with the Capital V!
*I tell you I'm simply mad about racing.
*Thought they could outwit Cruella? Never!
*BLAST!
*Who did this?!
*WWAAAAAAHHH!!
*Oh miserable!!

==The Incredibles==
===Dash Parr===
*I'll do my best! My best is super-fast!

===Violet Parr===
*We can use our powers. Right?
*I am so ready for this!

==Moana==
===Moana===
*I won't let you down.
*I've got this.
*See ya out there!
*I come from a long line of voyagers.
*Hope the wind's with me.
*I won? I won!

==TRON==
===Zuse===
*I am ready for victory!

==Big Hero 6==
===Hiro===
*Prepare to be amazed.
*Hope you're ready to eat my dust!
*Okay, I'll admit. I did it. That was pretty epic.

===Honey Lemon===
*Whoohoo!
*Don't worry! I will ''not'' let you down.
*Excellent choice.

===Go Go Tomago===
*Looks like you need serious help.
*Try to keep up.
*Let's get this done.

==Winnie the Pooh==
===Eeyore===
*Figures.

==Rescue Rangers==
===Chip===
*We have to stay alert!
*I'll get the job done!
*Rescue Rangers to the rescue!
*My name's Chip! Nice to see ya!
*Almost got it!
*Let's go!
*I won ''and'' had fun!
*We need evidence!
*Clues!
*Don't worry! I'm on the case!

===Dale===
*Come on! It'll be a blast!
*I-I-I-I got this!
*You'll never catch me!
*Acorns!
*You can count on ''me''!

==Zootopia==
===Judy Hopps===
*Judy Hopps, ZPD! Hello!
*Oh, I am so ready for this.
*I won't let you down.
*Drive safely, everyone.
*You can count on me.
*Got it!
*Evidence!
*I did it!
*ZPD!
*Gotcha!
*There's that one.
*See? Anyone ''can'' do anything.
*Let's show 'em what a bunny from the burrows can do!
*Here we go.
*See? Not too bad for a bunny, huh?
*Please call me Judy.
*I'm on the case!
*

===Nick Wilde===
*Count me in.
*It's you and me, pal.
*Come on, you know you love me.
*Wasn't me.

===Flash Slothmore===
*Excellent... choice.

==Cars==
===Tow Mater===
*We're gonna be good friends.
*Well, dadgum! Let's get started!

===Cruz Ramirez===
*Excellent choice.

==Mabel Tanaka==
*This is gonna be great!
*Come on, let's go see what's out there!

[[Category: 2023 video games]]</text>
      <sha1>giqwc5hz061uo4fs5g0zhzy64pk9igt</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965278</id>
      <parentid>3965192</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:53:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Voltlds</username>
        <id>780530</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965278</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6620" sha1="brnd3v1n4mjg04qm83l9eooy93y4r1r" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Disney Speedstorm}}''' is a free-to-play kart racing game developed by Gameloft Barcelona and published by Gameloft. It features various Disney and Pixar characters racing vehicles on tracks themed after the worlds of their films and franchises.

==Mickey and Friends==
===Mickey Mouse===
*Mickey Mouse is in the house!

===Minnie Mouse===
*I'm here to help!
*Time to race!
*This is so exciting!
*We can do it!
*Come on, everyone!
*Oh, I'm so happy!
*Time to pick up the pace!

===Donald Duck===
*''I'm'' the best driver for this job!
*Heh-heh-heh!
*I'm prepared for this!
*Hurray!
*You can't catch me!
*Ah, phooey...

===Daisy Duck===
*See you in my rear-view mirror!
*Don't worry. I do ''not'' dawdle.
*Not a problem!
*First place here I come!
*Oh, well! I had fun!
*That's me to a tee!

===Goofy===
* I can drive anything! Even a bathtub!

===Scrooge McDuck===
*Good grief!
*Let's take a dive!
*Ho-ho-ho! I've wouldn't have missed this for all the scums in Scotland!
*And the adventure begins!
*Let's get started! Time is money!
*Ahh... A grand day for a race!
*Gold rush!
*Impressive!
*Oh! What fat luck!
*Smarter than the smarties!
*And I won in square, too!
*Ho-ho-ho! You can't go wrong with Scrooge McDuck!
*Ready when you are!
*And you can take that to the bank!

==Hercules==
===Hercules===
*This one's for you, Phil.

===Megara===
*Name's Megara.
*Well, that stinks.
*Won't say I don't like it.
*Well, what do you know?

==Beauty and the Beast==
===Belle===
*I'm dreading about this vehicle.
*This will make the most wonderful story!
*Imagine that!

==Monsters Inc.==
===Mike Wazowski===
*My car!
*I got everything to win right here.
*Not to brag, but I really bring out the whole package.
*This is bad.
*Deep breaths. I've got this!

===Sulley===
*You won't be disappointed.

==Toy Story==
===Woody===
*They don't call me &quot;Sheriff Speedy&quot; for nothing.
*Trust me. I'm the right toy for this job.
*Right call.
*Ha, ha! ''That'' was fun!

===Buzz Lightyear===
*I can win this thing with my eyes closed!
*You came to the right Space Ranger!
*Move out!
*Let's make things interesting!
*Maximum power!
*You can always count on me!

===Jessie===
*Everybody ready to eat my dust?
*This ain't my first rodeo!
*All geared up and ready to go!
*Oh, I'm readier than ready!
*Guess close only counts in horseshoes.
*Who's the best cowgirl in the whole west? Me!
*You betcha!
*I know just what to do!
*I call that my finest hour!
*Just call me the high-ridin'-st, rootin'-tootin'-ist cowgirl of all time!
*Got any critters that need wrangling?

===Bo Peep===
*Stick with me. You'll be fine.
*Follow my lead.
*That's right. Playtime is over.

===Emperor Zurg===
*Triumph is ''all'' I do.
*Success as usual.
*This ''whole'' galaxy is mine!

===Rex===
*Ooh, I'm so conflicted!
*I don't understand!
*Losing health units.

==Lilo and Stitch==
===Stitch===
*My name, Stitch!
*Stitch Win!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*Woo! Yes! Stitch fancy now.
*Whoa! Dogaaba!
*Yes.
*Go fast!
*Ooh! Stitch go fast! Vroom!
*Okidoki!
*Okay. Good!
*Hi-hi-hi-hi! Rawr, rawr!

===Lilo===
*I'm troubled.
*Guess I've messed up.
*Follow me!
*Okay. Time to put it all together.
*Say cheese!

===Angel===
*Coochiboo...?
*Heheheheh!

===Captain Gantu===
*What are your orders?
*I'll look forward to it.
*Surprise!
*Fire on sight!

==Oswald the Lucky Rabbit==
===Oswald===
*Oh, are we gonna go or what?
*I feel like a whole new rabbit!

==Frozen==
===Anna===
*So ready for this!

==Wreck-It Ralph==
===Vanellope===
*I've got a date with destiny!
*Let's roll!
*I'm gonna win! I can feel it in my core!
*I'm here... and I'm there!
*So long!
*Piece of cake!
*Hey there, weirdo.
*You know I'm a professional racer, right?
*Let me at 'em!
*Hello, fellow racers!
*See ya, chums!
*Glitch mode!
*I rest my case!
*Don't worry. I've got this race wired.

==The Nightmare Before Christmas==
===Jack Skellington===
*Shall we frighten the competition?
*Fantastic!
*Oh, what fun this will be!
*How tragic.
*Enjoy your gifts.

==Inside Out==
===Sadness===
*Maybe I just lie down.

===Fear===
*I won't let you down, I hope.
*Aaahhh! Okay...
*Well, I guess we're really doing this.

==Sleeping Beauty==
===Aurora===
*We'll have the happiest time.

==Cruella De Vil==
*It's &quot;De Vil,&quot; with the Capital V!
*I tell you I'm simply mad about racing.
*Thought they could outwit Cruella? Never!
*BLAST!
*Who did this?!
*WWAAAAAAHHH!!
*Oh miserable!!

==The Incredibles==
===Dash Parr===
*I'll do my best! My best is super-fast!

===Violet Parr===
*We can use our powers. Right?
*I am so ready for this!

==Moana==
===Moana===
*I won't let you down.
*I've got this.
*See ya out there!
*I come from a long line of voyagers.
*Hope the wind's with me.
*I won? I won!
*Gotta go fast!

==TRON==
===Zuse===
*I am ready for victory!

==Big Hero 6==
===Hiro===
*Prepare to be amazed.
*Hope you're ready to eat my dust!
*Okay, I'll admit. I did it. That was pretty epic.
*They'll never see me coming.
*You are ''not'' ready.
*May the best racer win, and I plan to.
*I totally crushed it!

===Honey Lemon===
*Whoohoo!
*Don't worry! I will ''not'' let you down.
*Excellent choice.

===Go Go Tomago===
*Looks like you need serious help.
*Try to keep up.
*Let's get this done.

==Winnie the Pooh==
===Eeyore===
*Figures.

==Rescue Rangers==
===Chip===
*We have to stay alert!
*I'll get the job done!
*Rescue Rangers to the rescue!
*My name's Chip! Nice to see ya!
*Almost got it!
*Let's go!
*I won ''and'' had fun!
*We need evidence!
*Clues!
*Don't worry! I'm on the case!

===Dale===
*Come on! It'll be a blast!
*I-I-I-I got this!
*You'll never catch me!
*Acorns!
*You can count on ''me''!

==Zootopia==
===Judy Hopps===
*Judy Hopps, ZPD! Hello!
*Oh, I am so ready for this.
*I won't let you down.
*Drive safely, everyone.
*You can count on me.
*Got it!
*Evidence!
*I did it!
*ZPD!
*Gotcha!
*There's that one.
*See? Anyone ''can'' do anything.
*Let's show 'em what a bunny from the burrows can do!
*Here we go.
*See? Not too bad for a bunny, huh?
*Please call me Judy.
*I'm on the case!
*Judy Hopps, ready to roll!
*I've got this!
*Okay, I think I know all the local traffic rules.
*Stop right there!
*I am in pursuit!
*Okay!
*Oh, sweet cheese and crackers! I did it!

===Nick Wilde===
*Count me in.
*It's you and me, pal.
*Come on, you know you love me.
*Wasn't me.
*Smart choice.

===Flash Slothmore===
*Excellent... choice.

==Cars==
===Tow Mater===
*We're gonna be good friends.
*Well, dadgum! Let's get started!

===Cruz Ramirez===
*Excellent choice.

==Mabel Tanaka==
*This is gonna be great!
*Come on, let's go see what's out there!
*I know I'm ready for this.

[[Category: 2023 video games]]</text>
      <sha1>brnd3v1n4mjg04qm83l9eooy93y4r1r</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Don Donald</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>300071</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964929</id>
      <parentid>3964071</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:04:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964929</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="773" sha1="eixbbrn1i9vtruykr75cy0xkgbum1ns" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Don Donald|Don Donald]]''''' is a 1937 American animated short film about Donald Duck attempting to woo a female Mexican duck named Donna. 
:''Directed by [[w:Ben Sharpsteen|Ben Sharpsteen]].''

{{Film-stub}}

== Donald Duck ==
* So you jackass, I'm gonna knock you good! Uh oh.

==Dialogue==
:'''Donald Duck:''' Uh oh! Hi toots
:''[Donna hits Donald, they both do their fiery temper acts]''
:'''Donna Duck:''' Donald! Forever! ''[hits Donald with a guitar]'' Hey! Pasiso, Patato, Fæva, Yasacha Famour.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

{{Mickey Mouse &amp; Friends}}

[[Category:Donald Duck films]]
[[Category:1937 animated films]]
[[Category:1937 American animated films]]
[[Category:Mexican films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Ben Sharpsteen]]</text>
      <sha1>eixbbrn1i9vtruykr75cy0xkgbum1ns</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964930</id>
      <parentid>3964929</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:04:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964930</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="782" sha1="kc82b5h7o6bd52bd2eqpo6pgnqm5liq" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Don Donald|Don Donald]]''''' is a 1937 American animated short film about Donald Duck attempting to woo a female Mexican duck named Donna. 
:''Directed by [[w:Ben Sharpsteen|Ben Sharpsteen]].''

{{Film-stub}}

== Donald Duck ==
* So you jackass, I'm gonna knock you good! Uh oh.

==Dialogue==
:'''Donald Duck:''' Uh oh! Hi toots
:''[Donna hits Donald, they both do their fiery temper acts]''
:'''Donna Duck:''' Donald! Forever! ''[hits Donald with a guitar]'' Hey! Pasiso, Patato, Fæva, Yasacha Famour.

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}

{{Mickey Mouse &amp; Friends}}

[[Category:Donald Duck films]]
[[Category:1937 animated films]]
[[Category:1937 American animated films]]
[[Category:Mexican animated films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Ben Sharpsteen]]</text>
      <sha1>kc82b5h7o6bd52bd2eqpo6pgnqm5liq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>User:Raquel Baranow/Sandbox</title>
    <ns>2</ns>
    <id>301855</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965106</id>
      <parentid>3953106</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:34:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Raquel Baranow</username>
        <id>915940</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Syntax / Reference */ link to commons User:Raquel Baranow/City of David Gallery</comment>
      <origin>3965106</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2372" sha1="6dbywzmor1cfv9qw7181fwp1vvxu90x" xml:space="preserve">'''''The “Sandbox” is where Wikiquotians / Wikipedians compose quotes / articles and experiment with wikitext.''''' Please visit my [[user:Raquel_Baranow]] page!


=== Quotes ===

==Syntax / Reference==

&lt;span style=&quot;font-size: 125%;&quot;&gt;{{center|'''This draft is live: [[Abolish money|ABOLISH MONEY]]'''}}&lt;/span&gt;

* [https://pageviews.wmcloud.org/topviews/?project=en.wikiquote.org&amp;platform=all-access&amp;date=2026-04 Top Views]
* [https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Special:RecentChanges?days=7&amp;hideWikibase=1&amp;hidebots=1&amp;hidecategorization=1&amp;limit=250&amp;urlversion=2 Recent changes] 
* [[commons:User:Raquel Baranow/City of David Gallery]]
*[[Joseph_Goebbels#Sportsplast_speech_“slip_of_the_tongue”_(18_February_1943)]]
* [[wikt: χάραγμα]] vs [[wikt: στίγμα]]
* [[wikisource:]]
*[[Gottfried_Feder#&quot;Manifesto_for_the_Abolition_of_Enslavement_to_Interest_on_Money&quot;_(1919)|Interest slavery]]
* [[wq:MOBILEFRIENDLY]]: do not stack pictures in the lead
* [[w:MOS:OVERLINK]]: does the article you're about to link to help someone understand the article you are linking from? 
* [[w:MOS:NOLINKQUOTE]]: link only to targets that correspond to the meaning clearly intended by the quote's author. 
* [[w:MOS:LINKSTYLE]] Section headings should not themselves contain links
* [[w:WP:UP]] userpage
* [[w:wp:NPOV]] neutral point of view/ 
* {{pbr}} (pbr) for paragraphs
* &lt;nowiki&gt; nowiki: &lt;nowiki&gt;{{pbr}}[&lt;/nowiki&gt; &lt;/nowiki&gt;
* [[w:help:Wikitext]] 
* &lt;nowiki&gt; &lt;!-- PLEASE: &lt;br&gt;
* [[wq:MOBILEFRIENDLY]]: do not stack pictures in the lead&lt;br&gt;
* [[w:MOS:OVERLINK]]: does the article you're about to link to help someone understand the article you are linking from? &lt;br&gt;
* [[w:MOS:NOLINKQUOTE]]: link only to targets that correspond to the meaning clearly intended by the quote's author.  --&gt; &lt;/nowiki&gt;

'''{{center|[[Overpopulation]]}}'''
{{center|[[https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Special:ListFiles?ilshowall=1&amp;limit=100&amp;user=Raquel+Baranow ''I uploaded all but one of these graphs to Wikimedia Commons'']]}}

{{center|1=[https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Special:ListFiles?ilshowall=1&amp;limit=100&amp;user=Raquel+Baranow ''I uploaded all but one of these graphs to Wikimedia Commons'']}}

__NOTOC__
:&lt;small&gt;'''CONTENT:'''&lt;/small&gt; [[#A-D|A-D]] , [[#E-H|E-H]] , [[#I-L|I-L]] , [[#M-P|M-P]] , [[#Q-T|Q-T]] , [[#U-Z|U-Z]] , [[#See also|See also]] , [[#External links|External links]]</text>
      <sha1>6dbywzmor1cfv9qw7181fwp1vvxu90x</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>2026 Iran war</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>304631</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965105</id>
      <parentid>3964530</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:29:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* July */ United States Reimbursement Fee scrapped in less than a day</comment>
      <origin>3965105</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="125653" sha1="1swmfyudmv9crzxzzpb5m6c5j7blf3l" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Saegheh (4).jpg|thumb|Multiple drones interconnected and moving as one with smaller drones below the bigger drones like legs Real alien shit aerial minefield of drones [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/downed-us-pilot-iran-drones-jellyfish-formation-b3001791.html ]]]
[[File:Netanyahu apologizes to Qatar.webp|thumb|Well, I'm not gonna tell you what I'm gonna do, but it gets solved. I'm a problem solver. I get problems solved real fast, including with BB.[https://www.aninews.in/news/world/us/i-get-problems-solved-real-fast-including-with-bibi-trump-on-lebanon-standoff20260623082558 ]]]

[[File:Trump -- United States of the Middle East -- map of Iran.jpg|thumb|United States of the Middle East?[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116624042090139559 ]]][[File:2026-04-07 Trump – A whole civilization will die tonight 2026-04-07 192815.png|thumb|Based on the fact that discussions with the Islamic Republic of Iran have been brought to the highest level of Iranian leadership and approved, I have, as President of the United States of America, cancelled the scheduled strikes and bombings against Iran this evening. Discussions and final points have been, in both concept and great detail, approved by all parties involved, including the United States, Israel, Saudi Arabia, UAE, Qatar, Turkey, Pakistan, Bahrain, Kuwait, Jordan, Egypt, and others. The Naval Blockade will remain in full force and effect until this Transaction is finalized — Time and place of the signing to be announced shortly.

DONALD J. TRUMP
PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116732652997120164 ]]][[File:IRGC Seal Chest Badge.svg|thumb|Borderless fighters are overseeing your transit chokepoints. If necessary, others will also come Continue your aggression and they will seize your throat] ~ CmdrGeneralQaani [https://www.tasnimnews.ir/en/news/2026/06/09/3612261/resistance-s-new-security-belt-extends-from-hormuz-to-bab-el-mandeb-irgc-quds-force-chief ]]][[File:Dedication Stone De Becker Memorial Chapel American College.jpg|thumb|We Must Recommit to One Nation Under God.Therefore, we must restore the military draft Being a citizen of the United States gives us unparalleled freedoms and opportunities that are the envy of the world. However, these freedoms that we cherish do not come without a cost [https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/celebrity/articles/comedian-rob-schneider-proposes-military-184035757.html?guccounter=1 Schneider]]][[File:Achaemenid cylinder seal showing 2 scenes. An Achaemenid king before 2 sphinxes (below god Ahura Mazda). Supernatural creature fighting 2 ibexes. 6th-4th century BCE. From Hillah, Iraq. British Museum (cropped).jpg|thumb|Straits of Hormuz are named after Ahura Mazda from Zoroastrianism [https://nitter.poast.org/elonmusk/status/2063866701356089711#m Musk]]][[File:Imam Khamenei with his son, Ayatollah Sayyid Mojtaba Khamenei.jpg|thumb|Younger. I think more rational. Wounded. He is quite seriously wounded. There is a certain bravery in that ~[https://news.am/en/news/1041776 Trump]]][[File:Abdul_Rahman_Mosque_in_March_2010.jpg|thumb|There is women with manteaus being thrown out of mosques but they are now the ones waving flag [https://www.tabnak.ir/fa/news/1375015/%D9%BE%D8%B2%D8%B4%DA%A9%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%AE%DB%8C-%D9%85%D8%B3%D8%A7%D8%AC%D8%AF-%D8%AE%D8%A7%D9%86%D9%85%E2%80%8C%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AA%D9%88%DB%8C%DB%8C-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D8%B1%D9%88%D9%86-%D9%85%DB%8C%E2%80%8C%DA%A9%D9%86%D9%86%D8%AF Pezeshkia]]][[File:Comintern Logo.svg|thumb|Cuba has collapsed. We will handle that as soon as we take care of the Islamic Republic of IranWe will take good care of them. We will let them go back to their land, invest in Cuba, and be with their families. We have very good plan… then on our way back, we’ll make a little brief stop These are unbelievable people. Energetic. Entrepreneurial. Some of the richest people in Miami are Cuban[https://en.cibercuba.com/noticias/2026-06-05-u1-e199894-s27061-nid331291-trump-asegura-cubanos-quieren-presencia-estados Trump]]]
[[File:Abbas Araghchi in a interview with khamenei.ir (cropped 2).jpg|thumb|The building where we were sitting was targeted, but the wing we were in remained intact , After returning from the Geneva negotiations on Friday, I went to his office at 9 a.m. on Saturday to present my report, My report was about the negotiations and the atmosphere that emerged on Friday, which made the possibility of war much greater, When I got out from under the rubble, I was only thinking about whether he had been the target of the strike or not ~Iraqchi[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606047013 ]]][[File:Donald Trump official portrait.jpg|thumb|If Iran surrenders, admits their Navy is gone and resting at the bottom of the sea, and their Air Force is no longer with us, and if their entire Military walks out of Tehran, weapons dropped and hands held high, each shouting “I surrender, I surrender” while wildly waving the representative White Flag, and if their entire remaining Leadership signs all necessary “Documents of Surrender,” and admit their defeat to the great power and force of the magnificent U.S.A., The Failing New York Times, The China Street Journal (WSJ!), Corrupt and now Irrelevant CNN, and all other members of the Fake News Media, will headline that Iran had a Masterful and Brilliant Victory over The United States of America, it wasn’t even close ~ Trump[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202605262547 ]]][[File:Official portrait of Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent (borderless) (cropped).jpg|thumb|We have seized about a billion dollars of their crypto, Just outright grabbed the wallets. I think between five and a half-six weeks of an incredibly successful military campaign and then Operation Economic Fury, where we have really cut them off … they are at the end of their tether now financially. We didn't have regime change but we changed the regime, on one side, we have a theocracy with the clerics. On the other side, we have a thug autocracy with the IRGC. And you've got to convince both sides.[https://www.foxbusiness.com/media/scott-bessent-says-us-seized-roughly-1b-iranian-crypto-regime-nears-end-tether  ~Bessent]]][[File:Official portrait of Secretary Marco Rubio (cropped)(2).jpg|thumb|One of the things you'll find pretty consistently in every totalitarian system is that they want to control the ability of their citizens to communicate with one another ~Rubio [https://x.com/StateDept/status/2062260777348718963 ]]]
[[File:Strait of Hormuz.jpg|thumb|Blockade Plus : Sustain the blockade and accompanying economic warfare to destabilize the regime’s hold on the state; remake the world in America’s energy dominance image to mitigate long-term price impacts while undermining China’s global ambition to defeat the United States; and order the US military to forge a path through the Strait of Hormuz to restore freedom of navigation [https://nypost.com/2026/05/01/opinion/heres-how-to-crush-tehran-in-three-moves/ ]]]

[[File:Pirate Flag of Jack Rackham.svg|thumb|We took over the ship; we took over the cargo, took over the oil. It’s a very profitable business . . . We’re like pirates. We’re sort of like pirates. - Trump[https://geopoliticaleconomy.com/2026/05/09/trump-pirates-iran-ships-china-us-sanctions/]]]

[[File:Flag of the United States Secretary of the Army.svg|thumb|God is good~Hegseth[https://www.cnn.com/2026/04/06/politics/hegseth-trump-iran-war-easter-christianity-analysis ]]][[File:TrinityDetonation1945GIF.gif|thumb|If there's no ceasefire, you're just going to have to look at one big glow coming out of Iran. President DJT[https://www.skynews.com.au/world-news/united-states/one-big-glow-coming-out-of-iran-trumps-wild-threat-as-he-hints-peace-deal-talks-might-collapse/video/8a668c00deaff3d27568bc78441e4a29 ]]]
[[File:Seal_of_the_Army_of_the_Guardians_of_the_Islamic_Revolution.svg|thumb|Having an atomic bomb is used to scare the enemy, and we should not use this bomb on the people in any way, unless it happens.[http://didbaniran.ir/fa/tiny/news-281553 Nataj]]][[File:Donald Trump OEF.jpg|thumb|Trump: &quot;I think the war is very complete, pretty much&quot; (Mar 9th)]]
[[File:Shajareh_Tayyebeh_school_in_Minab_photos_from_Mehr_(12).jpg|thumb|The American philosophy is, number one, you bomb civilians, you break all the rules of international law which are against that. You bomb civilians to demoralize them. And if you concentrate, as Trump did, along with Israel, {{w|2026 Minab school attack|a few weeks ago}}, you bomb the schools, you bomb the hospitals. - [[Michael Hudson (economist)|Michael Hudson]] [https://geopoliticaleconomy.com/2026/03/29/war-iran-change-economy-michael-hudson/] ]]

On 28 February 2026, [[Israel]] and the [[United States]] launched a '''[[w:2026 Iran War|coordinated joint attack]]''' on multiple sites in [[Iran]], sparking a major conflict. The operation, codenamed '''Operation Roaring Lion''' and '''Operation Epic Fury''' by the [[w:United States Department of Defense|U.S. Department of Defense]], targeted senior Iranian officials, military command centers, and key strategic facilities, with the declared aim of [[w:regime change|regime change]]. The attack included the [[w:Assassination of Ali Khamenei|assassination]] of Iran’s second [[w:Supreme Leader of Iran|Supreme Leader]], [[Ali Khamenei]].

The strikes began in the cities of [[Tehran]], [[w:Isfahan|Isfahan]], [[w:Qom|Qom]], [[w:Karaj|Karaj]], and [[w:Kermanshah|Kermanshah]]. Several Iranian government figures were killed, including [[w:Ali Shamkhani|Ali Shamkhani]], the secretary of the [[w:Supreme National Security Council|Supreme National Security Council]]. Witnesses reported explosions across multiple regions. Israeli Defense Minister [[w:Israel Katz|Israel Katz]] confirmed that the [[w:Israel Defense Forces|Israel Defense Forces]] had conducted the strikes. [[w:Donald Trump|Donald Trump]], in a video posted on [[w:Truth Social|Truth Social]], announced that the United States had joined Israel in launching attacks against Iran.

In retaliation, Iranian forces launched dozens of [[w:Unmanned aerial vehicles in the Iranian military|drones]] and [[w:ballistic missiles|ballistic missiles]] across the [[w:Persian Gulf|Persian Gulf]], targeting Israel as well as U.S. military installations in [[Jordan]], [[Kuwait]], [[w:Bahrain|Bahrain]], [[Qatar]], [[Iraq]], [[Saudi Arabia]], and the [[United Arab Emirates]].
[[File:Khamenei last end year 5458884.jpg|thumb|The newly supreme appointed leader should deliver message of the peace to world and declare new era in Iran , a historic neccessity to free political prisoners and declare public general amnesty for those that haven't collaborated in killing Iranians and/or 2026 Iran massacres [https://www.khabarfoori.com/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-59/3198657-%D8%AC%D8%A8%D9%87%D9%87-%D8%A7%D8%B5%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%AD%D8%A7%D8%AA-%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AA%D8%AE%D8%A7%D8%A8-%D8%B1%D9%87%D8%A8%D8%B1%DB%8C-%D8%AC%D8%AF%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%85%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%AD%D8%A7%D9%88%DB%8C-%D9%BE%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%B5%D9%84%D8%AD-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AC%D9%87%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A2%D8%BA%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%AF%D9%88%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%B2%D9%87-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B4%D8%AF-%D8%A7%D8%B9%D9%84%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%B9%D9%81%D9%88-%D8%B9%D9%85%D9%88%D9%85%DB%8C-%DA%A9%D9%84%DB%8C%D9%87-%DA%A9%D8%B3%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%DA%A9%D9%87-%D8%AF%D8%B3%D8%AA%D8%B4%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AE%D9%88%D9%86-%D8%A2%D9%84%D9%88%D8%AF%D9%87-%D9%86%D8%B4%D8%AF%D9%87-%D8%A2%D8%B2%D8%A7%D8%AF%DB%8C-%D9%87%D9%85%D9%87-%D8%B2%D9%86%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-%D9%81%D8%B9%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%85%D8%AF%D9%86%DB%8C-%DB%8C%DA%A9-%D8%B6%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%B1%D8%AA-%D9%85%D9%84%DB%8C-%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AE%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA ]]][[File:Portrait of Mojtaba Khamenei.jpg|thumb|Well, they [CIA] did say [He's gay], but I don’t know if it was only them. I think a lot of people are saying that. Which puts him off to a bad start in that particular country[https://www.firstpost.com/world/a-bad-start-in-iran-trump-says-cia-told-him-mojtaba-khamenei-is-gay-13993618.html Trump]]][[File:Flag of the Cooperation Council for the Arab States of the Gulf.svg|thumb|Trump is hysterical and struggling with last final breaths. Americans are at the end of their rope. Enemy is caught in desperate swamp...Netanyahu pumped up US to attack, we will exact vengeance...Trump you are a retarded person, ...we are funneling through pass of war,... Iranians have civilization, countries of region are acting like cuckold pimps... Trump says some people within of our military have defected give us 2 of these people names to us[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77421052/%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%AA%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%BE-%D8%A2%D8%AF%D9%85-%D8%B9%D9%82%D8%A8-%D8%A7%D9%81%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%AF%D9%87-%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%DA%AF%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%86%D9%87-%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF ~Larijani][https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77421726/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D9%86%D9%81%D8%B3-%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A2%D8%AE%D8%B1-%D8%AA%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%BE-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D9%87%DB%8C%D8%B3%D8%AA%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9-%D8%B4%D8%AF%D9%87-%D9%88 ][https://farsnews.ir/mohammadreza_dehghan/1772912586911483130/%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%AA%D8%A7-%DA%AF%D8%B1%D9%81%D8%AA%D9%86-%D8%AA%D8%A7%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AF%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%B3%D8%B1-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D9%86%D9%85%DB%8C-%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%85 ]]][[File:State_flag_of_Iran_(1964%E2%80%931980).svg|thumb|Seventeen 17 cities of Caucasian Iran was separated from Iran by Tsar Russia. We are reborn from ashes of Mongol invasion and Timurid.[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77413081/%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B3%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%AF%DA%AF%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D9%88%D9%86-%D9%88-%D8%AE%D8%A7%DA%A9 ]]]

== Quotes ==
&lt;small&gt;Please add quotes in chronological order&lt;/small&gt;
===Feb 2026===
* Will someone please tell [[Pope Leo XIV|Pope Leo]] that Iran has killed at least 42,000 innocent, completely unarmed, protesters in the last two months?
**[https://www.wsj.com/livecoverage/iran-us-strait-of-hormuz-blockade-updates/card/trump-criticizing-pope-says-iran-killed-at-least-42-000-protesters-gtRzVnxAMEMeQ8b5ygR2 Trump]
*I guess the worst case would be five years we do this and somebody takes over who's as bad as the previous person,
**[https://www.nytimes.com/2026/03/03/us/politics/trump-iran-leaders.html Trump]
*We have lost our great leader, and we deeply mourn him. We'll severely punish the perpetrators. , with an exceptionally severe, decisive, and painful punishment. We'll resolutely confront domestic and foreign conspiracies and punish the aggressors.
**[https://baike.baidu.com/en/item/Grand%20Ayatollah%20Seyyed%20Ali%20Khamenei/1512308#4-5:~:text=On-,February%2028%2C%202026,-%2C%20local%20time%2C%20Iranian IRGC]15:27, 28 Febr 2026 (UTC)~
*Finally, to the great, proud people of Iran, I say tonight that the hour of your freedom is at hand… Stay sheltered. Don't leave your home. It's very dangerous outside. Bombs will be dropping everywhere . when we are finished, take over your  government. It will be yours to take. This will be probably your only chance for
**Trump [https://www.pbs.org/newshour/world/read-trumps-full-statement-on-iran-attack PRESIDENT TRUMP's message to the great people of Iran ..]
*firm of heart against the disbelievers, compassionate among themselves.
**Khamenei quoted Quran[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77473280/%D8%A3%D8%B4%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%A1-%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D9%84%DA%A9%D9%81%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%B1%D8%AD%D9%85%D8%A7%D8%A1-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%D9%87%D9%85 ]
*There's a special place in hell reserved for pro-Trump Iranians.
**IRGC Mashre Dimitri Lascaris [https://www.shahrekhabar.com/news/177328434067132 ]
*400,000 armed people are ready to go to revolt against the United States government system
**Gen Araste[https://www.ettelaat.com/news/140255/%DB%B4%DB%B0%DB%B0-%D9%87%D8%B2%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D9%86%D9%81%D8%B1-%D9%85%D8%B3%D9%84%D8%AD-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%A7%D8%AF%D9%87-%D9%82%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C%D9%87-%D9%86%D8%B8%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%86-%DA%A9%D8%B4%D9%88%D8%B1-%D9%87%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%86%D8%AF#ref=shahrekhabar ]
*Russia and China will win the war not just Iran
**IRGC Gen RahimSafavi[https://www.shahrekhabar.com/news/177326496039426 ]
*We have arm around Americans neck we will be slapping it when it moves
**IRGC Gen Mohsen rezai[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77471755/%D9%85%D8%AD%D8%B3%D9%86-%D8%B1%D8%B6%D8%A7%DB%8C%DB%8C-%D8%AF%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%BE%D8%B4%D8%AA-%DA%AF%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%86-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%AA%D8%A7-%D8%A8%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%D8%AF-%D8%AA%DA%A9%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A8%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%B1%D8%AF-%DB%8C%DA%A9 ]
*If anyone comes to street they are seen as enemies and not as protestors.All our kids are putting their finger on triggers all alleys , streets , city squares belong to Police, special units and The IRGC Basij.
**FARAJA Cmdr Gen Ahmed Radan[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77462710/%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A7%DA%AF%D8%B1-%DA%A9%D8%B3%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%AF%D8%B4%D9%85%D9%86-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AE%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%A8%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%A7%D9%88-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D9%85%D8%B9%D8%AA%D8%B1%D8%B6 ]
* I can see that the peace deal is within our reach... if we... allow [[diplomacy]] the space it needs to get there... I don't think any alternative to diplomacy is going to solve this problem. ...The [[heart]] of this deal is very important and ...we have captured that heart. ...[I]f the ultimate objective is to ensure forever, that Iran cannot have a [[Nuclear weapons|nuclear bomb]] ...we have cracked that problem ...[W]e are talking about zero stockpiling ...[I]f you cannot stockpile material that is enriched ...there is no way you can ...create a bomb ...and ...equally important ...full and comprehensive verification by the [[w:International Atomic Energy Agency|IAEA]] ...The current stockpiles ...will be down-blended to the lowest level possible ...and converted into fuel that ...will be irreversible. ...I am ...confident ...that even the United States inspectors will have access at some point ...if we have a deal that is respected, and fair, and ...durable ...We have agreed, in general, to discuss economic and security cooperation between Iran and its neighbors, and set up a process of dialogue that will ...start the elements of building confidence, ...a rapport, a process that can ...lead ...to an understanding on all these ...areas of concern ...on the Iranian side, and ...on the [[w:Gulf Cooperation Council|GCC]] side. ...Broad terms, ...the politics, the ...main issues ...can be agreed [upon] tomorrow. The technicalities will take some time to work... out with... the IAEA. ...[T]hat can also be done ...relatively quickly, because a lot of this ...groundwork was done years ago, and it's ...in place. ...The substantial progress... is... far more than any time before. We just need that bit of extra time to close the deal.
** {{w|Badr bin Hamad Al Busaidi}}, &quot;Oman's foreign minister says U.S.-Iran nuclear 'deal is within our reach'&quot; (Feb 27, 2026) ''{{w|Face the Nation}}'' statements prior to the US-Israeli attacks. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pg5sXQDR8NY&amp;t=38s A Youtube video source.]

*Mahdi is with us and in charge of Umma, he has through Assembly of Experts introduced Ayatallah Mojtaba Khamenei
**[https://kayhan.ir/fa/news/328896/%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%B2%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%B9%D8%AC-%D9%88%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%81%D9%82%DB%8C%D9%87-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AE%D8%A8%D8%B1%DA%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%85%D8%B9%D8%B1%D9%81%DB%8C-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AF-%D9%86%DA%A9%D8%AA%D9%87 Hossein Shariatmadare]
*The revolution will not sit down until flag of Mahdi is raised on all corners of earth
**[https://kayhan.ir/fa/news/328901/%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%86%D9%87%E2%80%8C%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D8%A7-%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AC%D8%AF%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%85%D8%AC%D8%AA%D8%A8%DB%8C-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%AF%D9%87-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA Hossein Shariatmadare]
*To save his soldiers Trump has gone to Volodymir Zelensky president-clown of Ukraine for aid
**[https://kayhan.ir/fa/news/328922/%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%86%D8%AC%D8%A7%D8%AA-%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B2%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%B4-%D8%AF%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86-%DB%8C%DA%A9-%D8%AF%D9%84%D9%82%DA%A9-%D8%B4%D8%AF Hossein Shariatmadare]
*War's balance changed and Islamic Republic of Iran has the upper hand, there won't be a negotiatons any country who helps America will be targeted as enemy
**[https://tasnimnews.ir/fa/news/1404/12/19/3537514/%D9%85%D9%88%D9%81%D9%82%DB%8C%D8%AA-90-%D8%AF%D8%B1%D8%B5%D8%AF%DB%8C-%D8%AD%D9%85%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%AA-%D9%85%D9%88%D8%B4%DA%A9%DB%8C-%D9%88-%D9%BE%D9%87%D9%BE%D8%A7%D8%AF%DB%8C-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%85%D9%88%D8%A7%D8%B2%D9%86%D9%87-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D9%86%D9%81%D8%B9-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA ICA]
*A vessel has passed through Hormuz strait , an United States (US) military navy escorted her. In Playstation
**ICA[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77461463/%D9%88%D8%A7%DA%A9%D9%86%D8%B4-%D8%B1%D8%A6%DB%8C%D8%B3-%D9%85%D8%AC%D9%84%D8%B3-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%A7%D8%AF%D8%B9%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%AF%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%BA%DB%8C%D9%86-%D9%88%D8%B2%DB%8C%D8%B1-%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%B1%DA%98%DB%8C-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D8%AF%D8%B1%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B1%D9%87-%D8%AA%D9%86%DA%AF%D9%87 ]
*We have only just begun our missiles have left utter ruin and destruction ,Netanyahu won't let you see
**Abbas Iraqchi[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77462291/%D8%B9%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%82%DA%86%DB%8C-%D9%85%D8%A7-%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%B2%D9%87-%D8%B4%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%B9-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%87-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%85 ]
*Our enemy is the stupidest idiot. Our defense system is an ideology not just a defense system, while when we hit Haifa their people were begging for car gas
**FARAJA Cmdr Gen Achmed Radan [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77460868/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AF%D8%B4%D9%85%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%85%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A7%D8%AD%D9%85%D9%82-%D8%AA%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%86-%D9%87%D8%A7-%D9%87%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%86%D8%AF ]
*Your children shall read Quran while sitting by the missile launchers tonight.
**Gen Mousavi [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77461610/%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D9%85%D9%88%D8%B3%D9%88%DB%8C-%D9%81%D8%B1%D8%B2%D9%86%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%B4%D9%85%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%B4%D8%A8-%D9%BE%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%84%D8%A7%D9%86%DA%86%D8%B1%D9%87%D8%A7-%D9%82%D8%B1%D8%A2%D9%86-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%B3%D8%B1-%D9%85%DB%8C-%DA%AF%DB%8C%D8%B1%D9%86%D8%AF ]

[[File:HIMARS Support Operation Epic Fury (9564974).jpg|thumb|Operation Epic Fury]]

===Mar 2026===
*We have destroyed practically work ethic. Culture of not working/unemployment and day off has taken over society. We should think of day to daily paid workers 
**[https://tasnimnews.ir/fa/news/1405/03/16/3609932/%D8%AD%D8%A7%D8%AC%DB%8C-%D8%AF%D9%84%DB%8C%DA%AF%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D9%81%D8%B1%D9%87%D9%86%DA%AF-%DA%A9%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%B1%D9%81%D8%AA%D9%87-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D9%84%D8%B2%D9%88%D9%85-%D9%BE%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AA%D8%B9%D8%B7%DB%8C%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%85%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%B1 ICA-ART19]
*I can't tell I may have a plan or I may not, Marco would put me on a helicopter.
**Trump [https://news.meaww.com/video/marco-would-put-me-on-a-helicopter-trump-jokes-on-kharg-island-question-says-i-cant-tell ]
*All vessels shall not pass Hormuz Strait
**IRGCN Gen Ali Tangsiri[https://www.mehrnews.com/news/6771339/%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%AA%D9%86%DA%AF%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%B1%DB%8C-%D9%87%DB%8C%DA%86-%D8%B4%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%88%D8%B1-%D9%85%D8%B1%D8%AA%D8%A8%D8%B7-%D8%A8%D8%A7-%D9%85%D8%AA%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%88%D8%B2%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AD%D9%82-%D8%B9%D8%A8%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%AA%D9%86%DA%AF%D9%87-%D9%87%D8%B1%D9%85%D8%B2 ]
*How much of a cuckold is American president, Australian police has taken our girls out of the hotel and forced and made them to apply for asylum
**Mehdi Taj Chairman National Football Federation[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77458637/%D9%85%D9%87%D8%AF%DB%8C-%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%AC-%D8%AF%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%88%D8%B2%DA%AF%DB%8C-%D8%B1%D8%A6%DB%8C%D8%B3-%D8%AC%D9%85%D9%87%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D8%AA%D8%A7-%DA%86%D9%87-%D8%AD%D8%AF-%D8%AF%D9%85-%DA%AF%DB%8C%D8%AA-%D8%AC%D9%84%D9%88%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%AC ]
*We are prepared to wage war against America for next at least another 10 year
**IRGC Gen Jabari[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77449662/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%85%D8%B4%D8%A7%D9%88%D8%B1-%D9%81%D8%B1%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AF%D9%87-%DA%A9%D9%84-%D8%B3%D9%BE%D8%A7%D9%87-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%B9%D9%86%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A2%D8%AF%D9%85-%D9%85%D8%B7%D9%84%D8%B9-%D9%85%DB%8C-%DA%AF%D9%88%DB%8C%D9%85-%DA%A9%D9%87 ]
*Iran is the conscious of the humanity, its real dignity and glory. It is chosen people fighting for the Victory of the Light. It it Ormuzd, Ishraq. Mahdi people.
**Dugin Alexander[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77392273/%D8%AA%D9%88%DB%8C%DB%8C%D8%AA-%D8%A7%D9%84%DA%A9%D8%B3%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%AF%D9%88%DA%AF%DB%8C%D9%86-%D9%BE%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%88%D9%86-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B3%D8%AA%D8%A7%D8%AF%DA%AF%DB%8C-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86 ]
*The recent war is between good and evil
**ICA[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77432191/%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF-%D8%A7%D8%AE%DB%8C%D8%B1-%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF-%D8%AD%D9%82-%D9%88-%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B7%D9%84-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA ]
*Like thunder we will strike Haifa
**IRGC Gen Seid mousavi[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77449498/%D8%B3%D8%B1%D9%84%D8%B4%DA%A9%D8%B1-%D8%B9%D8%A8%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%84%D9%87%DB%8C-%D9%87%D9%85%DA%86%D9%88%D9%86-%D8%B5%D8%A7%D8%B9%D9%82%D9%87-%D8%A8%D8%B1-%D8%AD%DB%8C%D9%81%D8%A7-%D9%88-%D9%BE%D8%A7%DB%8C%DA%AF%D8%A7%D9%87-%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D9%85%D9%86%D8%B7%D9%82%D9%87 ]
* Iran’s leaders before the attack had been clear that they were willing to negotiate on the nuclear question. Talks were ongoing... There had appeared to be a good basis for agreement, given... an Iranian government that... was not in a position to enrich uranium... for the foreseeable future. ...Americans ...were deeply unhappy with the results of America’s last big wars of {{w|regime change}} ...[[War in Afghanistan (2001–2021)|in Afghanistan]] [[Iraq War|and Iraq]]. At the beginning of this joint [[w:2026 Iran war|US–Israel campaign against Iran]], only about a third of Americans supported the adventure...
** Dana Allin, &quot;US politics and the war against Iran&quot; (Mar 2, 2026) [https://www.iiss.org/online-analysis/online-analysis/2026/02/the-us-israel-campaign-in-iran/ &quot;The US-Israel campaign in Iran&quot;] @[[w:International Institute for Strategic Studies|IISS]].org

*This is a war that should end it once and for all.
::[https://www.mehrnews.com/news/6764020/%D9%86%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%B2%D8%A7%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AF%D9%86%D8%A8%D8%A7%D9%84-%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF-%D9%85%D9%86%D8%B7%D9%82%D9%87-%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%B3%D8%AA%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%AF ICA] (Mar 2 2026)

*Our Brave and Powerful Armed Forces will avenge each and every Iranian mother, , father, and child who has been targeted by hostile forces.
**foreign minister Abbas Iraqchi[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77405403/%D8%B9%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%82%DA%86%DB%8C-%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%B1%D9%88%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%85%D8%B3%D9%84%D8%AD-%D9%85%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AA%DA%A9-%D8%AA%DA%A9-%D8%B4%D9%87%D8%AF%D8%A7-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%D9%86%D8%AF-%DA%AF%D8%B1%D9%81%D8%AA ]

*There is no shelter you can be safe 
**[https://www.shahrekhabar.com/news/177298212045678 IRGC text]

*We will fill Americans' coffins there is no end to war unless they fully surrender.
**IRGC operations mission statement[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77389339 ]

*Trump is more than 500 Americans killed dead America first or israel first. Inshallah Khamenei killing has heavy price
**Larijani[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77384703/%D8%AA%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%BE-%D8%AD%D8%B3%D8%A7%D8%A8-%DA%A9%D9%86%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D9%87%D9%85-%D8%A7%D9%88%D9%84-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%DB%8C%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D9%88%D9%84-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%A6%DB%8C%D9%84 ]

* Irregardless of cost. Not unlike United States of America. Same as Iran has not in past 300 years started wars, Iran is ready for long war.
** [[w:Ali Larijani|Ali Larijani]], Secretary of the Supreme National Security Council of Iran. [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77359057 Source (in Persian)]

*Now that we have baited America do not make ceasefire and/or peace we must destroy them
::Ayatallah Panahian[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77388174/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%AD%D8%AC%D8%AA-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%B3%D9%84%D8%A7%D9%85-%D9%BE%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%87%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A7%DA%AF%D8%B1-%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%A7%D8%B6%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A2%D8%AA%D8%B4-%D8%A8%D8%B3-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%86%D8%AF-%D9%86%D9%BE%D8%B0%DB%8C%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AF ]

*From us Iranian people only President son Aga Yusuf Pezeshkian and his buddies have internet connection.
::[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77388864/%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D9%85%D8%A7-%D9%85%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%85-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%81%D9%82%D8%B7-%D8%A2%D9%82%D8%A7-%DB%8C%D9%88%D8%B3%D9%81-%D9%88-%D8%B1%D9%81%DB%8C%D9%82%D8%A7%D8%B4-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%86%D8%AA%D8%B1%D9%86%D8%AA-%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1%D9%86%D8%AF Payamemam]

* These attacks from Israel and the United States... were unprovoked. There was no immanent threat. Many would interpret this war to be an illegal war.
** Evaleila Pesaran, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nJnVYpbKuM&amp;t=600s &quot;The war with Iran: An expert analysis&quot;] (Mar 2, 2026) Youtube video from [[University of Cambridge|Cambridge University]] channel.

* I see no indication that ...those institutions are weak or fraying or that you can destroy ...[them] from the air. ...[T]his administration is trying to justify the war the same way [[Jackson Pollock]] used to paint. You just throw a bucket of reasons up against the canvas and hope the result looks good. ...Iranian missiles ... [as] a threat to the United States... falls short of the truth by about 4,000 miles ...[I]f we're doing preventative wars now to prevent countries that might one day be a threat, is [[North Korea]]... [[China]]... [[Russia]] in line? I don't think so. ...I can't make head or tails out of the reason this administration has put forward for this war.
** [[w:Alan Eyre (diplomat)|Alan Eyre]], &quot;Expert panel breaks down U.S. objectives in Iran war&quot; (Mar 2, 2026) @''{{w|PBS News Hour}}''.

* Once again, America is going to war for Israel. Once again, many will die for the Zionist state, including American service members. Once again, we will stumble blindly into a military fiasco. Once again, we will do the bidding of a foreign power whose interests are not our interests, but whose lobbyists have bought up our political class, including Donald Trump. Once again, we will violate the U.N. charter by attacking a country that does not pose an imminent threat.
** [[Chris Hedges]], [https://scheerpost.com/2026/03/01/going-to-war-again-for-israel/ Going to War, Again, for Israel]. ScheerPost. (March 1, 2026)

* If the [[Precedents|precedent]] that is being set is, &quot;Any country with super
* [I]t is in many ways a final battle to decide what [[World War II]] was all about. Will [[international law]] crumble as a result of the unwillingness of enough countries to protect the rules of civilized [[law]] supporting the principles of [[Westphalian sovereignty|national sovereignty]], free from foreign interference and [[coercion]] from the 1648 {{w|Peace of Westphalia}} to the [[Charter of the United Nations|UN Charter]]?  And with regard to wars that inevitably are to be waged, will they spare {{w|civilian}}s and non-belligerents...
** [[Michael Hudson (economist)|Michael Hudson]], [https://www.counterpunch.org/2026/03/02/the-us-israeli-attack-was-to-prevent-peace-not-advance-it/ &quot;The US/Israeli Attack Was to Prevent Peace Not Advance It&quot;] (Mar 2, 2026) @''{{w|Counterpunch}}''

* Iran negotiators had agreed... not to have an [[Nuclear weapons|atom bomb]]... to reduce their refined uranium, to shift the refined uranium outside of the country, and to submit to an unprecedented degree of oversight... But none of this was about an atom bomb... The... reason that America has attacked Iran... was to control Near Eastern oil... and [[David Petraeus|General Petraeus]], years ago, had outlined this whole plan... &quot;...all of your profits and rents from the oil will be lent back to the United States, ...priced in dollars and invested in U.S. Treasury securities, U.S. bonds and U.S. stocks, so that the money, the vast dollar inflows from your oil exports, will all be part of the U.S. economy.&quot;&lt;br /&gt;I sat in on meetings in the {{w|White House}} in 1974 when this was discussed...
** [[Michael Hudson (economist)|Michael Hudson]], [https://www.democracynow.org/2026/3/3/michael_hudson_economist_trump_iran_attack A War for Oil:] Economist Michael Hudson on U.S. Quest to Control the World’s Oil Trade (Mar 3, 2026) @{{w|Democracy Now!}}

* [I]t is in many ways a final battle to decide what [[World War II]] was all about. Will [[international law]] crumble as a result of the unwillingness of enough countries to protect the rules of civilized [[law]] supporting the principles of [[Westphalian sovereignty|national sovereignty]], free from foreign interference and [[coercion]] from the 1648 {{w|Peace of Westphalia}} to the [[Charter of the United Nations|UN Charter]]?  And with regard to wars that inevitably are to be waged, will they spare {{w|civilian}}s and non-belligerents...
** [[Michael Hudson (economist)|Michael Hudson]], [https://www.counterpunch.org/2026/03/02/the-us-israeli-attack-was-to-prevent-peace-not-advance-it/ &quot;The US/Israeli Attack Was to Prevent Peace Not Advance It&quot;] (Mar 2, 2026) @''{{w|Counterpunch}}''

*The American philosophy is, number one, you bomb civilians, you break all the rules of international law which are against that. You bomb civilians to demoralize them. And if you concentrate, as Trump did, along with Israel, a few weeks ago, you {{w|2026 Minab school attack|bomb the schools}}, you bomb the hospitals. That’s American policy in foreign countries. It’s most visible in the case of Israeli policy, in Gaza, and now the West Bank as well. And it is the same policy that the United States has followed in Iran.
** [[Michael Hudson (economist)|Michael Hudson]], [https://geopoliticaleconomy.com/2026/03/29/war-iran-change-economy-michael-hudson/ &quot;The war on Iran is transforming the global economy: Economist Michael Hudson explains how&quot;] (Mar 29, 2026) @Geopolitical Economy Report

* Whenever a state chooses to go to [[war]]... you have to ask—where is the [[w:Intelligence assessment|intelligence]] on the threat? ...[T]he Trump administration ...in hurry mode ...chose to set [[diplomacy]] aside, despite the fact that the [mediating] [[w:Badr bin Hamad Al Busaidi#Diplomatic career|Omani foreign minister]] ...was convinced that remarkable progress had been made on the issue of [[Nuclear program of Iran|Iranian nuclear weapons]] ...[T]wo other arguments for the war: that the US faced an imminent threat from [[Iran]], and that Iran’s {{w|ballistic missile}} capability threatened the United States. Scratch this last claim—it’s simply not [[Truth|true]] ...Why would a much-weakened [[Islamic Republic of Iran|Islamic Republic]] pose an &quot;imminent threat&quot; ..? [[Marco Rubio]] has come forward with an absurd argument ...Does anyone truly believe that Israel would go it alone ...without US backing, that the operation was not jointly planned?  ...This is all desperate [[storytelling]], not intelligence.
** {{w|Wesley Wark}}, &quot;[https://thewalrus.ca/iran-foreign-policy-experts/ Eight Experts on What You’re Not Being Told about the War in Iran:] The questions that aren’t making it into the battlefield dispatches&quot; (Mar 3, 2026) @''{{w|The Walrus}}''

*  Ironically, the greatest beneficiaries of the United States’ grave [[wikt:violation#Noun|violation]]s of [[international law]] are the very actors whom, under normal circumstances, Washington would be seeking to restrain: [[Moscow]] will be emboldened to continue its barbaric [[w:Russo-Ukrainian war|assault on Ukraine]], while [[China]] will feel empowered to move on [[Taiwan]].
** [[w:Stephanie Turco Williams|Stephanie T. Williams]],  &quot;Flying blind&quot; (March 2, 2026) [https://www.brookings.edu/articles/after-the-strike-the-danger-of-war-in-iran/ &quot;After the strike: The danger of war in Iran&quot;] [[w:Brookings Institution|Brookings]].

* Iran negotiators had agreed... not to have an [[Nuclear weapons|atom bomb]]... to reduce their refined uranium, to shift the refined uranium outside of the country, and to submit to an unprecedented degree of oversight... But none of this was about an atom bomb... The... reason that America has attacked Iran... was to control Near Eastern oil... and [[David Petraeus|General Petraeus]], years ago, had outlined this whole plan... &quot;...all of your profits and rents from the oil will be lent back to the United States, ...priced in dollars and invested in U.S. Treasury securities, U.S. bonds and U.S. stocks, so that the money, the vast dollar inflows from your oil exports, will all be part of the U.S. economy.&quot;&lt;br /&gt;I sat in on meetings in the {{w|White House}} in 1974 when this was discussed...
** [[Michael Hudson (economist)|Michael Hudson]], [https://www.democracynow.org/2026/3/3/michael_hudson_economist_trump_iran_attack A War for Oil:] Economist Michael Hudson on U.S. Quest to Control the World’s Oil Trade (Mar 3, 2026) @{{w|Democracy Now!}}

*It's going to be... tempting for countries to think that in a world where there are no rules.., no [[w:Law of war|rules of war]], where that [[w:Liberal international order|post-war liberal order]], imperfect as it was, is now completely being disregarded.., that makes the world more dangerous for all of us. ...[T]here was an [[order]] of some kind ...a view that a degree of [[w:Consensus decision-making|international consensus]] was necessary ...before ...[[w:Interventionism (politics)|intervening in foreign countries]]. There were rules of war... [A]ll of us need to be... very thoughtful about supporting the creation of a world where anything goes, and [[might makes right]]. ...[[United States|America]] is still the preeminent [[power]], the {{w|superpower}}, the global [[Hegemony|hegemon]]. ...I hope this is a moment for Americans to reflect on the facts that the rules-based international order, which did act as a constraint on American power, also provided America with some meaningful [[protection]].
** [[Chrystia Freeland]], Chrystia Freeland on Iran, Ukraine, and Global Power Shifts | ''{{w|Amanpour and Company}}'' (Mar 3, 2026) [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vlj_beVDuxg&amp;t=196s 3:16.]

* [I]f it's... possible that there are about to be acts of [[terrorism]] by [[Iran]] inside the United States, how can [[United States Congress|Congress]] continue to blockade funds for the [[w:United States Department of Homeland Security|Department of Homeland Security]] until it gets [[reform]]s... including an end to the [[lying]]..? You're going to see a real press by the [[Second presidency of Donald Trump|Trump administration]] to say, &quot;Release the funds and let the Department... resume... operations.., including falsely calling people terrorists if they operate a camera near an immigration agent.&quot; You're going to see attacks on the [[freedom of the press]]. This administration... regards it as illegal, criminal, for reporters simply to ask questions of [[The Pentagon|Pentagon employees]]... Only the designated leaders... get to speak... and if they're... saying things that look like they might not be [[Truth|true]], you can't second guess or question them. We have had many instances... of false indications of [[w:Powers of the president of the United States#Emergency powers|emergency powers]]. The whole [[w:Tariffs in the second Trump administration|tariff nonsense]]... rested on [[Falsehood|false claims]] of the president... about economic emergency. ...[N]ow there's a real [[war]].., a real risk of terrorist activity... That's a much more plausible emergency.., and... what [[Courts|court]] will say, &quot;We don't think you're telling the truth about this either&quot;? ...So there will be new assertions of emergency power... [P]eople who have the president's ear have been urging him to use emergency powers against the [[w:2026 United States elections|elections of 2026]]. The possibility of that... are much higher today... than... a week ago. ...We're moving into extraordinary danger to democratic institutions. The [[w:2026 Iran war|war in Iran]]... is an urgent [[w:Domestic policy of the second Trump administration|domestic policy]] question... a massive grant of power to a president and administration that have proven... that they will [[Abuse of power|abuse any powers]] that they are en[[trust]]ed with.
** [[David Frum]], &quot;[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8w7KOoD8sCs&amp;t=190s No Exit from Trump's War:] with Tom Nichols&quot; The David Frum Show. A Youtube video from ''{{w|The Atlantic}}'' channel. (Mar 4 2026)

*&quot;Senate votes down resolution to stop Trump from continuing war with Iran&quot; (Mar 4, 2026)
**&lt;small&gt;''{{w|The Independent}}''. [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/senate-iran-war-vote-trump-powers-resolution-b2932221.html Source.]&lt;/small&gt;
*Nobody gets to hide and give the president an easy pass or an end-run around the Constitution. Everybody's got to declare whether they're for this war or against it.
** Sen. [[Tim Kaine]]
*War is ugly, it always has been ugly, but we're taking out a regime that has been trying to attack us for quite some time.
** Sen. [[Markwayne Mullin]]
*I learned when I was fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan, that when elites in Washington bang the war drums, pound their chest, talk about the costs of war and act tough, they're not talking about them doing it, they're not talking about their kids. They're talking about working class kids like us.
** Rep. [[Jason Crow]]

* Why are we going into Iran? ...[I]t is the president's [[wikt:vainglory#Noun|vainglory]]. He thinks he's on a roll, that... this is easy to do; that you can [[w:2026 United States intervention in Venezuela|knock off dictatorships like Venezuela]], and then have a parade; that this solves a lot of his problems. It gets people not talking about the [[Epstein files]]. ...[A] huge chunk of [[Donald Trump]]'s [[Foreign policy of the United States|foreign policy]] is rooted in trying to get people to stop talking about the Epstein files. ...[H]e is that [[wikt:narrow-minded#Adjective|narrow]] and [[wikt:crass#Adjective|crass]]. ...Now he's going to say he's a [[w:Powers of the president of the United States#Emergency powers|war president]]. That means you can't criticize me... I can stomp on the press... I can declare a [[w:Powers of the president of the United States#Emergency powers|national emergency]]. ...As the [[Parliament of the United Kingdom|British Parliament]] said... in [~]1944... &quot;This is not a propitious time for an [[Elections|election]].&quot; ...[[wikt:mischief#Noun|[M]ischief]] comes with a war because... presidential war powers... become almost unchallengeable.
** [[w:Tom Nichols (academic)|Tom Nichols]], [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8w7KOoD8sCs&amp;t=797s Trump’s War With Iran and a New Danger at Home] | The [[David Frum]] Show (Mar 4, 2026) A Youtube video from ''{{w|The Atlantic}}'' channel.

*[[Donald Trump|The president]] was not going to be just another president on a very long list who sat back and stood by and passed the buck of this direct threat to the next administration. The president had a feeling, again, based on fact, that Iran was going to strike the United States, was going to strike our assets in the region, and he made a determination to launch Operation Epic Fury based on all of those reasons.
**[[Karoline Leavitt]] quoted in [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-iran-war-white-house-briefing-b2931933.html &quot;Karoline Leavitt insists Trump had a ‘feeling based on fact’ before Iran strikes but still won’t detail imminent threat to US&quot;]], ''The Independent'' (05 March 2026)

*[T]o take on the extraordinary risks... without having made the case with the American people.., citing immanent threats that aparently don't exist... that's problematic, and the chances of unintended consequences... are... very serious...  [W]e're... using.., in many cases very expensive weapons to take down $20,000 drones. That's not a good equation... over time. ...I'm worried about ...second and third order consequences ...we so deplete our arsenal, and it takes a long time to rebuild ...puts us in a disadvantageous position when it comes to ...a [[China]] or ...[[Russia]]. ...[M]uch as ...everyone should want to see a change... it may simply ...reinforce the [[Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps|IRGC]] ...[I]t's very hard to produce regime change from outside. You can't bomb your way to it. ...The [[wikt:red flag#Noun|red flag]] ...is that this could be [[Syrian civil war|Syria]] [[wikt:redux#Noun|redux]] or  ...[[Libyan Crisis (2011–present)|Libya]] redux ...the country fracturing, imploding or even exploding with [[refugee]]s and [[w:International migration|migration]].., [[Extremism|extremist]] groups taking hold... It's incredibly ...[[dangerous]]. ...[I]t's never too late for [[diplomacy]]. ...&lt;br /&gt;[W]hen [[Russia]] is ...reaching a weak point because of its dependence on oil to fuel its war economy ...they get a lifeline, ...the price of oil is going up. The [[Europe|Europeans]], in having moved away from Russian gas, are now more dependent on the [[Middle East]]. ...If the {{w|Strait of Hormuz}} gets tied up ...that's ...a lot of pressure ...So mapping out, gaming out, planning out and ...making sure you have something in place to deal with ...second and third order effects is ...important, and it's not ...clear ...that was done ...There's been a shifting rationale ...[or] explanation for why this, why now? ...That's why it's so important to have ...laid this out before the American people, and our partners and allies. We might have had less friction with them if there was a compelling case ...and had them on the take-off, not mid-flight or on the landing.
** [[Antony Blinken]], [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHgG-lkOi6w&amp;t=74s &quot;Former Secretary of State on the Two Keys to Ending Iran War&quot;] (Mar 4, 2026) A Youtube video from the [[w:Bloomberg News|Bloomberg]] Podcasts channel.

*Majority of Experts Assembly has come to pick next leader who is Seid.
**Dirbaz[https://www.etemadonline.com/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-9/764537-%D9%85%D8%AC%D9%84%D8%B3-%D8%AE%D8%A8%D8%B1%DA%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%B1%D9%87%D8%A8%D8%B1%DB%8C ] (Mar 8 2026)

* Unprovoked attacks by the [[United States|US]] and [[Israel]]... violate the fundamental prohibition on the use of [[force]], [[Sovereignty|sovereign]] [[equality]], {{w|territorial integrity}}, and the [[duty]] to [[Peace|peacefully]] settle disputes... They also violate the {{w|right to life}}... We cannot pick and choose when [[international law]] applies. Unlawful [[military]] [[w:Interventionism (politics)|intervention]] is not a solution... These attacks do not strike military abstractions – they strike people... {{w|Civilian}}s are bearing the brunt of this war... In a country that has already lost thousands to [[Violence|violent]] [[Political repression|repression]]... these attacks deepen... profound human [[tragedy]]... The targeting of civilians, educational facilities, and medical institutions constitutes a grave violation of [[international humanitarian law]] and [[w:International human rights law|human rights law]]... Any path forward must be grounded in the [[rule of law]], the will of the [[Iranians|Iranian people]], and full accountability for the [[wikt:violation#Noun|violation]] of international law, by all parties... 
** {{w|Mai Sato}}, [[w:Cecilia Bailliet|Cecilia M. Bailliet]], {{w|Astrid Puentes Riaño}}, {{w|Alexandra Xanthaki}}, {{w|Farida Shaheed}}, Surya Deva, {{w|Margaret Satterthwaite}}, {{w|Gina Romero}}, Nicolas Levrat, [[w:Richard Bennett (UN)|Richard Bennett]], Tomoya Obokata, [[w:Mary Lawlor (human rights advocate)|Mary Lawlor]], {{w|Ben Saul}}, {{w|Alice Jill Edwards}}, [[Francesca Albanese]], Morris Tidball-Binz, {{w|Siobhán Mullally}}, Gabriella Citroni, Grażyna Baranowska, Aua Baldé, Ana Lorena Delgadillo Pérez, {{w|Bina D'Costa}}, {{w|Claudia Flores}}, Ivana Krstić, {{w|Dorothy Estrada-Tanck}}, Haina Lu, [[Reem Alsalem]], {{w|Paula Gaviria Betancur}}, Elizabeth Salmón, Mariana Katzarova (Special Procedures of the Human Rights Council, volunteer Special Rapporteurs/Independent Experts/Working Groups) [https://www.ohchr.org/en/press-releases/2026/03/iran-un-experts-call-de-escalation-and-accountability &quot;Iran: UN experts call for de-escalation and accountability&quot;] (Mar 4, 2026) [[w:Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights|OHCHR]].

* [[Mohammed bin Salman|The Crown Prince]] and other [[w:Arab states of the Persian Gulf|Gulf]] leaders have been urging America not to undertake military action against Iran, because all of us believe... action will not remain confined to Iran; that Iran will retaliate against American in the area, which is present in all of the Gulf states, and as far away as [[Turkey]]... They've been warning the Americans not to undertake military action and suffer the consequences. ...I don't think the system in Iran will collapse any time soon. ...Iranian leadership has been preparing for an eventuality like this, because of what they have continued to hear from [[Benjamin Netanyahu|Mr. Netanyahu]] in the past 40 years. He has been calling for the destruction of Iran, and so the Iranians... have been preparing themselves for such an eventuality. ...The only way the system will go... is through the Iranian people.
** {{w|Turki bin Faisal Al Saud}}, &quot;Fmr. Saudi Intelligence Chief Discusses Gulf States' Reaction to Iran Attacks | ''{{w|Amanpour and Company}}''&quot; [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LfGcX4XuZ5A&amp;t=62s 1:02,] 5:08.

* Iran just stated that they are going to hit very hard today, harder than they have ever been hit before.., THEY BETTER NOT DO THAT, HOWEVER, BECAUSE IF THEY DO, WE WILL HIT THEM WITH A FORCE THAT HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE! 
** [[Donald J. Trump]], post on Truth Social, &quot;Trump warns Iran of unprecedented force if it retaliates&quot; (Feb 28, 2026) {{w|Reuters}}.

*I think the war is very complete, pretty much. [Iran has] no navy, no communications, they've got no air force. Their missiles are down to a scatter. Their drones are being blown up all over the place, including their manufacturing of drones.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-iran-cbs-news-the-war-is-very-complete-strait-hormuz/ &quot;Trump says 'the war is very complete,' and he's considering taking over Strait of Hormuz&quot;], ''CBS News'' (Mar 9 2026)

*US officials are posting fake news to manipulate narkets. It won't protect them from inflationary tsunami they've imposed on Americans Markets are facing biggest shortfall in HISTORY bigger than Arab Oil Embargo, Kuwait 
**[https://www.etemadonline.com/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%85%D9%84%D9%84-17/764878-%D8%B9%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%82%DA%86%DB%8C-%D9%88%D8%B2%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%AE%D8%A7%D8%B1%D8%AC%D9%87-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7 Mr Iraqchi] (Mar 10 2026)

*If Iran does anything that stops the flow of Oil within the Strait of Hormuz, they will be hit by the United States of America TWENTY TIMES HARDER than they have been hit thus far. Additionally, we will take out easily destroyable targets that will make it virtually impossible for Iran to ever be built back, as a Nation, again - Death, Fire, and Fury will reign upon them - But I hope, and pray, that it does not happen! This is a gift from the United States of America to China, and all of those Nations that heavily use the Hormuz Strait. Hopefully, it is a gesture that will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://x.com/WhiteHouse/status/2031167037620236703 Trump on TruthSocial] (10 March 2026)

*Most definitely we are not seeking ceasefire we will break zionist life cycle of war-negotiations-ceasefire and then war again forever
**Moahamedbagher Ghabilaf[https://www.etemadonline.com/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-9/764797-%D8%A2%D8%AA%D8%B4-%D8%A8%D8%B3-%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86- %D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%A6%DB%8C%D9%84 ] (Mar 10 2026)

*Take Bahrain back! Annex it
**MP Aytallah Resaei Hamid[https://www.khabarfoori.com/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-59/3200147-%DB%8C%DA%A9-%D9%86%D9%85%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%86%D8%AF%D9%87-%D9%85%D8%AC%D9%84%D8%B3-%D8%A8%D8%AD%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D9%BE%D8%B3-%D8%A8%DA%AF%DB%8C%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%85 ], 12 March 2026

*I have seen his body after martyred, I heard he clenched his fist.You people have led the country. The will of the masses is to continue the effective and regrettable defense. Certainly, the leverage of blocking the Strait of Hormuz should still be used. Neighboring countries must make their position clear to the aggressors against our country... In any case, we will demand compensation from the enemy; if they refuse, we will seize as much of their property as we determine; if that is not possible, we will destroy as much of their property as we can.
**Mojtaba Khamenei (12 March 2026)[https://www.irna.ir/news/86100475/%D8%B1%D9%87%D8%A8%D8%B1-%D9%85%D8%B9%D8%B8%D9%85-%D8%A7%D9%86%D9%82%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%A8-%D8%AA%D8%A7%DA%A9%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D8%B1-%D9%86%D9%82%D8%B4-%D9%88-%D8%AD%D8%B6%D9%88%D8%B1-%D9%85%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%85-%D8%AD%D8%B6%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%B5%D8%AD%D9%86%D9%87-%D8%A8%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%AF ][https://www.khabarfoori.com/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-59/3200277-%D8%B4%D9%85%D8%A7-%D9%85%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%85-%DA%A9%D8%B4%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%B1%D9%87%D8%A8%D8%B1%DB%8C-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AF%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AE%D9%88%D9%86-%D8%B4%D9%87%DB%8C%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%B4%D9%85%D8%A7-%D8%B5%D8%B1%D9%81-%D9%86%D8%B8%D8%B1-%D9%86%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%DB%8C%D9%85-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AF-%D9%87%D9%85%DA%86%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AA%D9%86%DA%AF%D9%87-%D9%87%D8%B1%D9%85%D8%B2-%D8%A8%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%87-%D8%A8%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AF-%D9%85%D8%B9%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AF%D9%88%D8%B3%D8%AA%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D8%A7-%D9%87%D9%85%D8%B3%D8%A7%DB%8C%DA%AF%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%87%D8%B3%D8%AA%DB%8C%D9%85 ]

*Aggression against soil of Iranian islands will shatter all restraint. We will abandon all restraint and make the Persian Gulf run with the blood of invaders.
**[https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77477478/%D9%82%D8%A7%D9%84%DB%8C%D8%A8%D8%A7%D9%81-%D9%87%D8%B1%DA%AF%D9%88%D9%86%D9%87-%D8%AA%D8%B9%D8%AF%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AE%D8%A7%DA%A9-%D8%AC%D8%B2%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D9%88%DB%8C%D8%B4%D9%86%D8%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%AA%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D9%85%DB%8C], ''Qalibaf'' (12 March 2026)

*The [[United States]] is the largest Oil Producer in the World, by far, so when oil prices go up, we make a lot of money. BUT, of far greater interest and importance to me, as President, is stoping an evil Empire, Iran, from having Nuclear Weapons, and destroying the [[Middle East]] and, indeed, the World. I won’t ever let that happen!
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/iran-us-war-live-updates-supreme-leader-trump-oil-b2937272.html &quot;Iran-US war latest: Supreme leader statement threatens fresh attacks after UK base in Iraq hit by drone swarm&quot;], ''The Independent'' (12 March 2026)

*As long as America and Zionist exist humankind will not see quiet. To establish peace they must be destroyed
**Aytallah Khatami Imam Tehran [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77485962/%D8%AE%D8%A7%D8%AA%D9%85%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%B5%D9%84%D8%AD-%D8%A8%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%B1%DA%98%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%B5%D9%87%DB%8C%D9%88%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%B3%D8%AA%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%AF ][https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77487036/%D8%AA%D8%A7-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7-%D9%88-%D8%B1%DA%98%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%B5%D9%87%DB%8C%D9%88%D9%86%DB%8C-%D9%87%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%86%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D8%B4%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AA-%D8%B1%D9%88%DB%8C-%D8%A2%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%B4-%D9%86%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%D8%AF-%D8%AF%DB%8C%D8%AF] (13 March 2026)
*Just run!
**IRGC hebrew text [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77499999/%D8%AE%D8%B7%D8%A7%D8%A8-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%B3%D8%A7%DA%A9%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%B3%D8%B1%D8%B2%D9%85%DB%8C%D9%86-%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D8%B4%D8%BA%D8%A7%D9%84%DB%8C-%DA%A9%D9%84%D8%A7-%D9%81%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%B1-%DA%A9%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF ] (14 March 2026)
*If Americans do heliborne operation on taking over Khark Island we will attack their bases and take prisoners
**FM Manouchehr Motaki Iran negotiators [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77500152/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%85%D8%AA%DA%A9%DB%8C-%D8%A7%DA%AF%D8%B1-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7%DB%8C%DB%8C-%D9%87%D8%A7-%D8%A8%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%D9%86%D8%AF-%D8%AC%D8%B2%DB%8C%D8%B1%D9%87-%D8%AE%D8%A7%D8%B1%DA%A9-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D8%B4%D8%BA%D8%A7%D9%84-%DA%A9%D9%86%D9%86%D8%AF ] (14 March 2026)
*If the [[2026 FIFA World Cup|World Cup]] games are in [[Mexico]] maybe we will go
**Minister of youth &amp; sport [https://sahebkhabar.ir/news/77499588/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%88%D8%B2%DB%8C%D8%B1-%D9%88%D8%B1%D8%B2%D8%B4-%D9%81%DB%8C%D9%81%D8%A7-%D8%A8%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%85%DB%8C%D8%B2%D8%A8%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AC%D9%87%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7], (14 March 2026)
*Countries in region are supposed to pay reparations for killing Khamenei. 
**VP Mohammed Mokhber [https://www.mehrnews.com/news/6774791/%D9%85%D8%AE%D8%A8%D8%B1-%DA%A9%D8%B4%D9%88%D8%B1%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%85%D9%86%D8%B7%D9%82%D9%87-%D9%85%DA%A9%D9%84%D9%81-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AC%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AE%D8%B3%D8%A7%D8%B1%D8%AA-%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D9%88%D8%A7%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%87-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%87%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%86%D8%AF] (14 March 2026)
*When I feel it. When I feel it in my bones.
**[[President Trump]] quoted when asked when the war will end: [https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/trump-says-iran-war-will-end-when-i-feel-it-in-my-bones_uk_69b57775e4b09d87d0277fa2 &quot;Trump Says Iran War Will End 'When I Feel It In My Bones'&quot;], ''Huffington Post'' (14 March 2026)
*It's a little unfair. You win a war, but they have no right to be doing what they're doing.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c70k29914q4o &quot;Surge in US petrol prices deepens political peril for Trump over Iran&quot;], ''BBC News'' (17 March 2026)
*Because of the fact that we have had such Military Success, we no longer “need,” or desire, the NATO Countries’ assistance — WE NEVER DID! Likewise, Japan, Australia, or South Korea. In fact, speaking as President of the United States of America, by far the Most Powerful Country Anywhere in the World, WE DO NOT NEED THE HELP OF ANYONE! 
**[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116245182325726375 Donald Trump on Truth Social] (17 Mar 2026)

*[[Israel]], out of anger for what has taken place in the Middle East, has violently lashed out at a major facility known as South Pars Gas Field in Iran. A relatively small section of the whole has been hit. The United States knew nothing about this particular attack, and the country of [[Qatar]] was in no way, shape, or form, involved with it, nor did it have any idea that it was going to happen. Unfortunately, Iran did not know this, or any of the pertinent facts pertaining to the South Pars attack, and unjustifiably and unfairly attacked a portion of Qatar’s LNG Gas facility. NO MORE ATTACKS WILL BE MADE BY ISRAEL pertaining to this extremely important and valuable South Pars Field unless Iran unwisely decides to attack a very innocent, in this case, Qatar - In which instance the United States of America, with or without the help or consent of Israel, will massively blow up the entirety of the South Pars Gas Field at an amount of strength and power that Iran has never seen or witnessed before. I do not want to authorize this level of violence and destruction because of the long term implications that it will have on the future of Iran, but if Qatar’s LNG is again attacked, I will not hesitate to do so. 
**[[Donald Trump]] on [https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116253388303392718 Truth Social] (Mar 19, 2026)

* Iranian missiles do not differentiate between Muslim and Christian and Jew and whichever religion, they're out there to kill anybody because they feel everybody who doesn't accept their belief is an infidel.
**Israeli President [[Isaac Herzog]] following the 2026 Beit Awwa salon strike in the West Bank. (Mar 19, 2026)[https://www.jpost.com/middle-east/iran-news/article-890479]

*We are getting very close to meeting our objectives as we consider winding down our great Military efforts in the Middle East with respect to the Terrorist Regime of [[Iran]]: (1) Completely degrading Iranian Missile Capability, Launchers, and everything else pertaining to them. (2) Destroying Iran’s Defense Industrial Base. (3) Eliminating their Navy and Air Force, including Anti Aircraft Weaponry. (4) Never allowing Iran to get even close to Nuclear Capability, and always being in a position where the U.S.A. can quickly and powerfully react to such a situation, should it take place. (5) Protecting, at the highest level, our Middle Eastern Allies, including [[Israel]], [[Saudi Arabia]], [[Qatar]], the [[United Arab Emirates]], [[w:Bahrain|Bahrain]], [[Kuwait]], and others. The [[w:Hormuz Strait|Hormuz Strait]] will have to be guarded and policed, as necessary, by other Nations who use it — The United States does not! 
**[[Donald Trump]] on [https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116263563453969628 Truth Social] (Mar 20, 2026)

[[File:Strait of Hormuz.jpg|thumb|Strait of Hormuz]]
*If Iran doesn’t FULLY OPEN, WITHOUT THREAT, the [[w:Strait of Hormuz|Strait of Hormuz]], within 48 HOURS from this exact point in time, the United States of America will hit and obliterate their various POWER PLANTS, STARTING WITH THE BIGGEST ONE FIRST!
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/clyxv87zwwpo &quot;Trump at a crossroads as US weighs tough options in Iran&quot;], ''BBC News'' (21 March 2026)

*In difficult times like these, when events seem both confused and confusing, [[Mark Twain]]’s “broken fragments of antique legends” can remind us of historical analogies like the collapse of the power and influence of [[Great Britain]] or of the [[Soviet Union]] that can help us understand how the past often whispers to the present — as it indeed seems to be doing these days in the [[Strait of Hormuz]].
** [[Alfred W. McCoy]], [https://inkstickmedia.com/how-the-iran-war-gave-trump-his-very-own-suez-crisis/ &quot;How the Iran War Gave Trump His Very Own Suez Crisis&quot;] (21 March 2026)

*No countries that are [[North Atlantic Treaty Organization|NATO]] allies that have been bullied by Trump are going to be willing… to go on this suicide mission for someone who is an asshole to them.
**Adam Mockler from [[w:MeidasTouch|MeidasTouch]] quoted telling [[CNN]] in [https://inews.co.uk/news/world/trump-iran-gamble-failed-americas-allies-pay-it-4309972 &quot;Trump’s Iran gamble has failed – and America’s allies will pay for it&quot;], ''iNews'' (March 22, 2026)

*Maybe me. Me and the ayatollah, whoever the ayatollah is, whoever the next ayatollah is. There’s automatically a regime change, but we’re dealing with some people that I find to be very reasonable, very solid. The people within know who they are. They’re very respected, and maybe one of them will be exactly what we’re looking for.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted on who would control the [[w:Strait of Hormuz|Strait of Hormuz]] in [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/trump-ayatollah-joint-leadership-hormuz-b2944024.html &quot;Trump proposes extraordinary ‘joint leadership’ of Iran alongside ayatollah&quot;], ''Independent'' (23 March 2026)

*No negotiations have been held with the US, and fake news is used to manipulate the financial and oil markets and escape the quagmire in which the US and Israel are trapped.
**[[w:Mohammad Bagher Ghalibaf|Mohammad Bagher Ghalibaf]] quoted in [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/trump-ayatollah-joint-leadership-hormuz-b2944024.html &quot;Trump proposes extraordinary ‘joint leadership’ of Iran alongside ayatollah&quot;], ''Independent'' (23 March 2026)

*Because they’re going to make a deal. They did something yesterday that was amazing, actually. They gave us a present. And the present arrived today. And it was a very big present worth a tremendous amount of money. And I’m not going to tell you what that present is, but it was a very significant prize.… That meant one thing to me—we’re dealing with the right people.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted on negotiations with [[Iran]] in [https://www.newsbreak.com/the-new-republic-1991457/4556482986909-trump-says-he-changed-his-mind-after-iran-gave-very-big-present &quot;Trump Says He Changed His Mind After Iran Gave 'Very Big Present'&quot;], ''Newsbreak'' (24 March 2026)

*Has the level of your inner ⁠struggle reached the stage ⁠of you negotiating with yourself?
**Iranian Ebrahim Zolfaqari's rhetorical question to Donald Trump quoted in [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2026/3/25/us-talking-to-itself-says-iran-as-trump-claims-wheels-of-diplomacy-turning &quot;US talking to itself, says Iran as Trump claims wheels of diplomacy turning&quot;], ''Al Jazeera'' (25 March 2026)

* The enemy signals negotiation in public, while in secret it plots a ground attack. Our firing continues. Our missiles are in place. Our determination and faith have increased. [Iranian forces] are waiting for the arrival of American troops on the ground to set them on fire and punish their regional partners for ever.
** Iranian parliament speaker, [[w:Mohammad Bagher Ghalibaf|Mohammad Bagher Ghalibaf]], quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/mar/29/iran-accuses-us-plotting-ground-assault-publicly-seeking-talks &quot;Iran accuses US of plotting ground assault while publicly seeking talks&quot;], ''Guardian'' (29 March 2026)

*This is our God: Jesus, king of peace, who rejects war, whom no one can use to justify war. He does not listen to the prayers of those who wage war, but rejects them.
* ([[Isaiah]] 1:15) ‘Even though you make many prayers, I will not listen: your hands are full of blood.’
**[[Pope Leo XIV]] quoting ''Book of Isaiah'', reported in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cje4x38q8xqt?post=asset%3A58d1f907-b13b-443a-b413-d7741b63b566 &quot;'Hands full of blood': Pope Leo seemingly criticises those involved in war&quot;], ''BBC News'' (29 March 2026)

===Apr 2026===
[[File:Gas prices Sonoma, California April 7 2026.jpg|thumb|Trump: We will consider when Hormuz Strait is open, free, and clear. Until then, we are blasting Iran into oblivion or, as they say, back to the Stone Ages.]]
*We're finishing the job, and I think within maybe two weeks, maybe a couple of days longer, to do the job. But we want to knock out every single thing they have. Now, it's possible that we'll make a deal before that.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://newsroom.ap.org/editorial-photos-videos/detail?itemid=ad13f6002bde4e30befd5495f58499d9 &quot;Trump: US could leave Iran in 2 to 3 weeks, securing Strait of Hormuz is 'not for us'&quot;], ''AP News'' (Apr 1, 2026)

*We will consider [a ceasefire] when [[w:Hormuz Strait|Hormuz Strait]] is open, free, and clear. Until then, we are blasting [[Iran]] into oblivion or, as they say, back to the Stone Ages.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-iran-speech-stone-age-b2950116.html &quot;Trump threatens both Iran and NATO allies ahead of primetime address on war: ‘Back to the Stone Ages’&quot;], ''Independent'' (Apr 1, 2026)

*If hostility escalates, the entire region will turn into hell for you; the illusion of defeating the Islamic Republic of Iran will become a quagmire into which you will sink.
**[[w:Ebrahim Zolfaghari|Ebrahim Zolfaghari]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c5y90jl8veyo US and &quot;Iran trade threats to unleash 'hell' as search for missing US airman continues&quot;], ''BBC News'' (4 April 2026)

*In the attempt to try to prevent Iran from developing a weapon of mass destruction, the US handed Iran a weapon of mass disruption.
**Ali Vaez, quoted in [https://www.reuters.com/world/middle-east/us-intelligence-warns-iran-unlikely-ease-hormuz-strait-chokehold-soon-sources-2026-04-03/ Reuters]

*Tuesday will be Power Plant Day, and Bridge Day, all wrapped up in one, in Iran. There will be nothing like it!!! Open the Fuckin' Strait, you crazy bastards, or you'll be living in Hell - JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah. President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cvg0q6wdzp1o Trump issues expletive-laden threat to Iran over Hormuz Strait blockage], ''BBC News'' (5 April 2026)

* Subject to the Islamic Republic of Iran agreeing to the COMPLETE, IMMEDIATE, and SAFE OPENING of the Strait of Hormuz, I agree to suspend the bombing and attack of Iran for a period of two weeks
** [[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/apr/07/trump-iran-war-ceasefire US and Iran agree to provisional ceasefire as Tehran says it will reopen strait of Hormuz], ''The Guardian'' (8 April 2026 )

* If attacks against Iran are halted, our Powerful Armed Forces will cease their defensive operations. For a period of two weeks, safe passage through the Strait of Hormuz will be possible via coordination with Iran's Armed Forces and with due consideration of technical limitations.
** Iran’s foreign minister, [[w:Abbas Araghchi|Abbas Araghchi]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/apr/07/trump-iran-war-ceasefire &quot;US and Iran agree to provisional ceasefire as Tehran says it will reopen strait of Hormuz&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (8 April 2026 )

* The Iranians don’t seem to realize they have no cards, other than a short term extortion of the World by using International Waterways. The only reason they are alive today is to negotiate!
** [[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/apr/10/jd-vance-warns-iran-against-trying-to-play-the-us-in-peace-talks &quot;JD Vance warns Iran against trying to ‘play’ the US in peace talks&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (10 April 2026 )

*The simple question is, do we see a fundamental commitment of will for the Iranians not to develop a nuclear weapon, not just now, not just two years from now, but for the long term. We haven’t seen that yet.
**[[JD Vance]]  quoted in [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/iran-us-peace-talks-vance-trump-b2956013.html &quot;Why the US-Iran peace talks failed after just one day – and what happens next&quot;], ''The Independent'' (12 April 2026)

* We’re going to clean out the strait.
**[[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/5827840-trump-navy-strait-hormuz-blockade/ &quot;US military will ‘clean out’ Strait of Hormuz: Trump&quot;], ''The Hill'' (12 April 2026)

* We’re very disappointed with [[NATO]], we’re very, very disappointed that they didn’t come. Now, they want to come and they want to help with the strait.
**Trump quoted in [https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/5827840-trump-navy-strait-hormuz-blockade/ &quot;US military will ‘clean out’ Strait of Hormuz: Trump&quot;], ''The Hill'' (12 April 2026)

[[File:Straße von Hormuz.jpg|thumb|Trump - Iran has agreed to never close the Strait of Hormuz again]]

* In line with the ceasefire in Lebanon, the passage for all commercial vessels through [the] [[w:Strait of Hormuz|Strait of Hormuz]] is declared completely open for the remaining period of ceasefire, on the coordinated route as already announced by Ports and Maritime Organisation of the Islamic Rep. of Iran.
** Iran Foreign Minister [[w:Abbas Araghchi|Abbas Araghchi]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cqxdg17yr2wt Iran says Strait of Hormuz is 'open' as Trump says US blockade will continue until deal reached], ''BBC News'' (Apr 17, 2026)

* [[Iran]] has agreed to never close the Strait of Hormuz again. It will no longer be used as a weapon against the World!
** [https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116420562510387829 Donald Trump on Truth Social] (Apr 17, 2026)

* Based on the fact that the Government of [[Iran]] is seriously fractured, not unexpectedly so and, upon the request of Field Marshal Asim Munir, and Prime Minister [[w:Shehbaz Sharif|Shehbaz Sharif]], of [[Pakistan]], we have been asked to hold our Attack on the Country of Iran until such time as their leaders and representatives can come up with a unified proposal. I have therefore directed our Military to continue the Blockade and, in all other respects, remain ready and able, and will therefore extend the Ceasefire until such time as their proposal is submitted, and discussions are concluded, one way or the other.
** [[Donald Trump]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cx297218m9vt &quot;Iran says reopening Strait of Hormuz 'impossible' if US blockade continues&quot;], ''BBC News'' (Apr 22, 2026)

* We are all 'Iranian' and 'revolutionary,' and with the iron unity of the nation and government, with complete obedience to the Supreme Leader. We will make the aggressor criminal regret his actions.
** Iran's President {{w|Masoud Pezeshkian}} quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c0mjev4kn9jt?page=2 &quot;Trump says Israel-Lebanon ceasefire extended by three weeks, but he won't 'rush' Iran deal&quot;], ''BBC News'' (Apr 24, 2026)

===May 2026===
*Iran has taken some shots at unrelated Nations with respect to the Ship Movement, PROJECT FREEDOM, including a South Korean Cargo Ship. Perhaps it’s time for South Korea to come and join the mission!{{Pbri}}We’ve shot down seven small Boats or, as they like to call them, “fast” Boats. It’s all they have left. Other than the South Korean Ship, there has been, at this moment, no damage going through the Strait. Secretary of War Pete Hegseth and Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Dan Caine, will have a News Conference tomorrow morning.
** [https://truthsocial.com/@realdonaldtrump Trump Truth Social Truth], 4 May 2026 
*Countries from all over the World. almost all of which are not involved in the Middle Eastern dispute going on so visibly, and violently, for all to see, have asked the United States if we could help free up their Ships. which are locked up in the Strait of Hormuz, on something which they have absolutely nothing to do with - They are merely neutral and innocent bystanders! For the good of Iran, the Middle East, and the United States, we have told these Countries that we will guide their Ships safely out of these restricted Waterways, so that they can freely and ably get on with their business. Again, these are Ships from areas of the World that are not in any way involved with that which is currently taking place in the Middle East. I have told my Representatives to inform them that we will use best efforts to get their Ships and Crews safely out of the Strait. In all cases, they said they will not be returning until the area becomes safe for navigation, and everything else. This process, '''Project Freedom''', will begin Monday morning, Middle East time. I am fully aware that my Representatives are having very positive discussions with the Country of Iran, and that these discussions could lead to something very positive for all. The Ship movement is merely meant to free up people, companies, and Countries that have done absolutely nothing wrong - They are victims of circumstance. This is a Humanitarian gesture on behalf of the United States, Middle Eastern Countries but, in particular, the Country of Iran. Many of these Ships are running low on food, and everything else necessary for large scale crews to stay on board in a healthy and sanitary manner. I think it would go a long way in showing Goodwill on behalf of all of those who have been fighting so strenuously over the last number of months. If, in any way, this Humanitarian process is interfered with, that interference will, unfortunately, have to be dealt with forcefully. Thank you for your attention to this matter!
**[https://truthsocial.com/@realdonaldtrump Trump Truth Social Truth]
*Quranic verdict of Zarif and Rouhani is execution definitely indeed
**Qasemian[https://www.khabaronline.ir/news/2213690/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%82%D8%A7%D8%B3%D9%85%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AD%DA%A9%D9%85-%D9%82%D8%B1%D8%A2%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%B1%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D8%A7-%D8%B8%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%81-%D9%88-%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%AD%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D9%82%D8%B7%D8%B9%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D8%B9%D8%AF%D8%A7%D9%85 ]19:05, (3 May 2026)
* Do you take out your wife, sister and wife so that unmarried men can look? There is a law, the parliament has approved it. I advise these women who come out without hijab: gather yourself. If these people decide, they will destroy your life. Netanyahu kills people, you beat people's opinion. They come again and appear in the square and street. Will you bring your sister and this woman so that the eyes of non-mahram men will fall on her situation?
**[https://www.khabaronline.ir/news/2213662/%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AC%D9%85%D8%B9%D9%87-%D8%B1%D8%B4%D8%AA-%D8%A7%DA%AF%D8%B1-%D9%85%D8%B1%D8%AF%D9%85-%D8%AA%D8%B5%D9%85%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%A8%DA%AF%DB%8C%D8%B1%D9%86%D8%AF-%D8%AF%D9%85%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%B2%DA%AF%D8%A7%D8%B1-%D8%A8%DB%8C-%D8%AD%D8%AC%D8%A7%D8%A8-%D9%87%D8%A7 Imam Juma Rasht] (3 May 2026)

* Operation Epic Fury is concluded. We achieved the objectives of that operation.
** [[Marco Rubio]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c1wz2ld4535t US &quot;Secretary of State Marco Rubio says offensive stage of Iran war is 'over'&quot;], ''BBC News'' (4 May 2026)

* Based on the request of [[Pakistan]] and other Countries, the tremendous Military Success that we have had during the Campaign against the Country of Iran and, additionally, the fact that Great Progress has been made toward a Complete and Final Agreement with Representatives of Iran, we have mutually agreed that, while the Blockade will remain in full force and effect, Project Freedom (The Movement of Ships through the Strait of Hormuz) will be paused for a short period of time to see whether or not the Agreement can be finalized and signed. 
** Trump quoted in  [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c152zyj0599t &quot;Trump says US will pause operation to guide ships through Strait of Hormuz&quot;], ''BBC News'' (6 May 2026)

* We have such a great military and great navy. And they were going straight through, and they said, “Turn your ship around!”. And there was no response. “Turn your ship around! Evacuate your engine room immediately!” And you see all these guys running out of there. Now, they’re five miles away — in one shot, into the engine room, blew up the engine room; the ship stopped, and they used tugboats. And then we landed on top of it — on top of everything else — we then land on top of it. And '''we took over the ship; we took over the cargo, took over the oil. It’s a very profitable business'''. Who would have thought we were doing that? '''We’re like pirates. We’re sort of like pirates'''. But we’re not playing games.
** Trump quoted in [https://geopoliticaleconomy.com/2026/05/09/trump-pirates-iran-ships-china-us-sanctions/ Trump boasts ‘we’re like pirates’, seizing Iran’s ships, as China challenges US sanctions]. Geopolitical Economy Report. (9 May 2026)

* We will never bow our heads before the enemy, and if talk of dialogue or negotiation arises, it does not mean surrender or retreat.
** Iranian President [[w:Masoud Pezeshkian|Masoud Pezeshkian]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/clypgz9e5pmo &quot;Trump calls Iran response to US proposal to end war 'totally unacceptable&quot;], ''BBC News'' (10 May 2026)

* 1. They martyred the great and devoted leader of the Islamic Revolution; 2. No Muslim country came to Iran aid. What sort of Islam is this .. what kind of Muslimhoodness is this; 3.Iran continues to resist the big and small Satan (America and Israel); 4. On one side of today's battle are America and Israel, and on the other side are Muslim Iran and the resistance forces. Which side are you; 5. Think about the future of the Islamic world. You know that America is not loyal to you and Israel is your enemy. Think for a minute about yourself and the future of the region;  6. Unity of the Islamic Ummah with all its power can provide and guarantee the security, excellence and independence of countries for everyone
**letter to 6 countries Larijani[https://fa.alalam.ir/news/7428293/%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%87-%DB%B6-%D8%A8%D9%86%D8%AF%DB%8C-%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%84%D8%A7%D8%B1%DB%8C%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D8%B7%D8%A7%D8%A8-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D9%85%D8%B3%D9%84%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AC%D9%87%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%88-%D8%AF%D9%88%D9%84%D8%AA-%D9%87%D8%A7%DB%8C-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D9%84%D8%A7%D9%85%DB%8C ]
*If you want Internet, pack and get up, leave your things, go to Afghanistan, live where there is Internet.
**IRIB anchor man [https://fararu.com/fa/news/970808/%D8%B4%D9%87%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B2%DB%8C-%D8%A7%DA%AF%D8%B1-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%86%D8%AA%D8%B1%D9%86%D8%AA-5g-%D8%A7%D9%81%D8%BA%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%B3%D8%AA%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%85%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%A7%D9%87%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D9%88%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D9%87%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AC%D8%A7-%D8%B2%D9%86%D8%AF%DA%AF%DB%8C-%DA%A9%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF ]p
*Like a rogue gang, the Iranian regime is pillaging resources that rightfully belong to the Iraqi people. Treasury will not stand idly by as Iran's military exploits Iraqi oil to fund terrorism against the United States and our partners.
**[https://twitter.com/SecScottBessent/status/2052447601304178863?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw Bessent]
*God's order to fight Fitne. Israel is to be wiped out. Division causes failure against enemies 
**Imam Karaj[https://www.imna.ir/news/971477/%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AC%D9%85%D8%B9%D9%87-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AC-%D8%A7%D8%AE%D8%AA%D9%84%D8%A7%D9%81-%D8%A7%D9%81%DA%A9%D9%86%DB%8C-%D8%B2%D9%85%DB%8C%D9%86%D9%87-%D8%B3%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%B4%DA%A9%D8%B3%D8%AA-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%A8%D8%B1%D8%A7%D8%A8%D8%B1-%D8%AF%D8%B4%D9%85%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA ][https://www.didbaniran.ir/%D8%A8%D8%AE%D8%B4-%D8%B3%DB%8C%D8%A7%D8%B3%DB%8C-3/284228-%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AC%D9%85%D8%B9%D9%87-%DA%A9%D8%B1%D8%AC-%D8%AF%D8%B3%D8%AA%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%AE%D8%AF%D8%A7-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%A7%D8%B3%D8%AA-%DA%A9%D9%87-%D8%AA%D8%A7-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%B1%D9%81%D8%AA%D9%86-%D9%81%D8%AA%D9%86%D9%87-%D8%A8%D8%AC%D9%86%DA%AF%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%A8%D9%87-%D8%AF%D8%B4%D9%85%D9%86-%D8%A7%D8%AC%D8%A7%D8%B2%D9%87-%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B2%D8%B3%D8%A7%D8%B2%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%AF%D8%B4-%D8%B1%D8%A7-%D9%86%D8%AF%D9%87%DB%8C%D9%85 ]
*Report of high Damage of internet blackout from government is greatly exaggerated.
**[https://www.zoomit.ir/iran-news/459800-denies-exaggerated-internet-outage-claims/] MP of Tehran 18:28, 15 May 2026 (UTC)~

*Trump is hopeless and desperate he went to begging China for no result. He will not be satisfied until Iran is destroyed.
**[https://www.khabaronline.ir/news/2219513/%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%AC%D9%85%D8%B9%D9%87-%D8%A7%D8%B1%D8%AF%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%84-%D8%AA%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%BE-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%AA%D9%85%D8%A7%D8%B3-%D8%A8%D9%87-%DA%86%DB%8C%D9%86-%D8%B9%D9%84%DB%8C%D9%87-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%86%D8%AA%DB%8C%D8%AC%D9%87-%D9%86%DA%AF%D8%B1%D9%81%D8%AA Ayatollah Imam Ardebil] (15 May 2026)

*China encourages the US and Iran to continue resolving their differences and disputes, including the nuclear issue, through negotiations, and advocates the swift reopening of the Strait of Hormuz on the basis of maintaining a ceasefire
**Chinese FM Wang in [https://aa.com.tr/en/asia-pacific/chinese-top-diplomat-urges-diplomacy-on-iran-after-trump-xi-summit/3938851] (15 May 2026)

*The most important issue today is trust. We cannot trust the Americans in any way
**[https://en.mehrnews.com/news/244536/Araghchi-holds-presser-in-New-Delhi], Iraqchi (15 May 2026)

*We’ve taken out much of what we’d have to do, probably another two weeks, two weeks, maybe three weeks I’m very torn on it, because they lost 42,000 people in the first two weeks. I don’t really want to see that You can’t have an unarmed population against people with AK-47s The Iranian people have to have guns and I think they’re getting some guns.

* As soon as they have guns, they’ll fight like as good as anybody there is.
**President Trump 07:48, 22 May 2026 (UTC)~~[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202605057012 ]
*They can either agree to a piece of paper that is satisfactory to the United States, or they can face a punishment from our military, the likes of which has not been seen in modern history. That’s the choice that they face
**Miller [https://unb.com.bd/category/World/trump-official-warns-iran-of-unprecedented-military-action-over-deal-holdout/186431 ] 07:48, 22 May 2026 (UTC)~

*Our American issue solves when they surely get the powerfulness we have , and they can't do anything against us
**Mohamed Mkokhber[https://www.khabaronline.ir/news/2222394/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%AA%D8%AD%D9%84%DB%8C%D9%84-%D9%85%D8%AE%D8%A8%D8%B1-%D8%AF%D8%B1%D8%A8%D8%A7%D8%B1%D9%87-%D8%B2%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%AD%D9%84-%D8%B4%D8%AF%D9%86-%D9%85%D8%B3%D8%A7%D8%A6%D9%84-%D8%A7%DB%8C%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A8%D8%A7-%D8%A2%D9%85%D8%B1%DB%8C%DA%A9%D8%A7 ] (22 May 2026)
* Matchmaking booths had been set up at rallies in Tehran, allowing young men and women to register for introductions under what organizers call “easy marriage.
**Fars[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202605215847 ]
*It's a possibility Iran we can go around ceasefire 
**[https://www.khabaronline.ir/news/2222363/%D8%A8%D8%A8%DB%8C%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AF-%D8%B9%D8%B6%D9%88-%DA%A9%D9%85%DB%8C%D8%B3%DB%8C%D9%88%D9%86-%D8%A7%D9%85%D9%86%DB%8C%D8%AA-%D9%85%D9%84%DB%8C-%D9%85%D8%AC%D9%84%D8%B3-%D8%A7%D8%AD%D8%AA%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%84-%D8%B9%D8%A8%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%A7%D8%B2-%D8%A2%D8%AA%D8%B4-%D8%A8%D8%B3-%D8%A7%D8%B2 ] National security Islamic Cunsultative Assembly MP (22 May 2026)
*Trying to prohibit Iranians in LA from bringing the Lion and Sun flag into the stadium is like trying to prevent Americans from bringing the U.S. flag into an American stadium. It would cause mass unrest.

* [[2026 FIFA World Cup|World Cup]] matches best illustrate the passion Iranian-Americans feel for their homeland and the contempt they feel toward the Iranian government. Waving the Lion and Sun flag is simultaneously a show of support for the national team and a protest against the regime.
**[https://www.nytimes.com/athletic/7288376/2026/05/19/world-cup-fifa-iran-flag/] ''NYTimes'' (22 May 2026)

* This is not good timing for me, I have a thing called Iran and other things
** Trump quoted in [https://www.iranintl.com/en/202605214172#:~:text=US%20President%20Donald%20Trump%20said,called%20Iran%20and%20other%20things.%E2%80%9D ] (22 May 2026)

* I laugh at all of the Dumocrats, RINOS, and Fools who know nothing about the potential deal I am making with Iran, things that haven’t even been negotiated yet.
** Trump quoted in [https://nypost.com/2026/05/25/us-news/president-trump-heralds-memorial-day-by-trashing-dumocrats-rinos-and-fools/ &quot;Trump trashes ‘Dumocrats, RINOS and Fools’ who question his Iran plans in Memorial Day message&quot;] ''NYPost'' (22 May 2026)

*The ayatollah has been replaced by a ‘thugocracy’. 
**Kirk Lippold [https://www.japantimes.co.jp/commentary/2026/06/03/world/instability-powerful-political-instrument/ ][https://www.taipeitimes.com/News/editorials/archives/2026/05/21/2003857691 ][https://www.foxnews.com/video/6394301883112 ]
*You lost hundreds of thousands of soldiers in these various wars. In two wars; Venezuela—where we lost nobody—and here We took over Venezuela. We essentially took over Iran. We have lost so far 13 people. Somebody else would have lost 100,000 people
**[https://www.indy100.com/politics/trump/trump-iran-war-soldiers-killed Trump]

* The humiliating defeat of Israel and the United States in their war on Iran, along with the savagery of the ongoing {{w|Gaza genocide|genocide in Gaza}}, are ushering in a new world order. This order is one where voices of reason and stability emanate not from the West — which spent tens of billions of dollars sustaining Israel’s genocide — but from the Global South, including China. It is an order where alliances are being rapidly reconfigured to protect countries from a rogue American state that lashes out like a wounded beast, as it spirals toward terminal decline.
** [[Chris Hedges]], &quot;[https://scheerpost.com/2026/05/29/the-rise-of-the-global-south/ The Rise of the Global South].&quot; Scheerpost (29 May 2026)

===June 2026===
* What the fuck are you doing? You're fucking crazy. You'd be in prison if it weren't for me. I'm saving your ass. Everybody hates you now. Everybody hates Israel because of this.
* I had a very productive call with Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu of Israel, and there will be no Troops going to Beirut, and any Troops that are on their way have already been turned back.
** [https://www.axios.com/2026/06/01/trump-netanyahu-israel-lebanon-call Trump to Bibi Netanyahu][https://www.axios.com/2026/06/01/trump-netanyahu-lebanon-israel-bomb-beirut &quot;'You're fucking crazy': Trump fumes at Netanyahu in call on Lebanon&quot;] ''Axios'' (June 1, 2026)

* I don’t care if they’re over, honestly. I really don’t care. I couldn’t care less. If they’re over, they’re over. If they’re not, you know, I think they took too much time. Frankly, I think they started to get a little boring.
** [[Donald Trump]] quoted on peace talks in [https://www.jezebel.com/iran-war-donald-trump-boring-bored-quote-ceasefire-negotiations-suspended-israel-lebanon &quot;Uh Oh, Trump Is Bored with Iran Peace Talks. You Know What That Means.&quot;], ''Jezebel'' (June 2, 2026)

*Iran must immediately stop their highly paid PROXIES in Lebanon from causing trouble. If they don’t, we’ll hit Iran very hard again, just like we did last week, only harder!!! President DONALD J. TRUMP
*[https://www.aa.com.tr/en/world/trump-warns-iran-to-stop-proxies-in-lebanon-or-us-will-hit-tehran-very-hard-again/3973762 Trump]
*Well, they’ve been largely decapitated. And I call it a military exercise because people would rather have it called that. They put up a blockade and so we blockaded them
*[https://fortune.com/2026/06/07/trump-iran-war-military-exercise-fighting-strait-of-hormuz-no-new-wars-promise/ Trump]
*I said, ‘Bibi, you better be careful, or you will be on your own very soon,
**[https://english.elpais.com/international/2026-06-09/iran-war-drives-a-wedge-between-trump-and-netanyahu.html Trump] (9 June 2026)
*Iran thing it's not a big thing for us
**[https://www.nytimes.com/2026/06/03/world/middleeast/trump-iran-war-remarks.html?eafs_enabled=false Trump] (3 June 2026)

*We have the highest stock market in history with a military conflict going on, or a war — some people call it war, some people call it a military — it’s not a big thing for us.
**Trump [https://www.nytimes.com/2026/06/03/world/middleeast/trump-iran-war-remarks.html] ''New York Times'' (3 June 2026)

*Communists always do well with the Voters or, as they would say, THE PEOPLE, in the Early Years! But, in the end, the Country, State, or City, GOES TO HELL! Great Violence proceeds at levels never seen before, and the entity dissolves into Poverty, Squalor, and Crime. Remember, breathtaking “Popularity” first, and then, guaranteed DEATH AND DESTRUCTION! President DONALD J. TRUMP
** [https://www.ntd.com/trump-decries-communism-says-its-breathtaking-popularity-turns-to-death-destruction-squalor_1150163.html] ''NTD'' (4 June 2026)

* It’s a different part of the world. You know, I’d say in that part of the world, a ceasefire is when you’re shooting in a more moderate manner.
** Trump quoted in [https://apnews.com/article/trump-iran-war-nuclear-deal-f6c5007b28e596e562c88b93ee785d91 &quot;With Trump in a holding pattern on Iran war, allies and critics worry he risks getting boxed in&quot;], ''AP News'' (4 June 2026)

*There is a reason for everything. We hit them pretty hard the night before and actually last night. And when it was explained to me, I said, ‘all right, so we'll do that.’ But we've been hitting them pretty hard.
**[https://www.cbsnews.com/live-updates/trump-iran-war-attacks-kuwait-airport-israel-hezbollah-ceasefire/ Trump] (4 June 2026)

*Yesterday, in a meaningless vote, the House voted, 4 bad Republicans and all of the Dumocrats, to limit my War Powers, right in the middle of my final negotiations to end the War with the Islamic Republic of Iran. Who would do such an unpatriotic thing. They know where the negotiations stand. The Democrats are fueled by Trump Derangement Syndrome. They would rather have our Country fail than give me another, of many, victories. The four Republicans, that’s a whole other story - They’re GRANDSTANDERS! They should be ashamed of themselves. MAGA!!! President DJT
**[https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/iran-us-war-live-trump-ceasefire-kuwait-israel-lebanon-b2989234.html], ''Independent'' (10 June 2026)

*If people are stupid, we’ll end up in something where we have to wipe out an entire infrastructure of a nation
**[https://www.aol.com/articles/trump-dealmaker-chief-reputation-comes-100000144.html Trump] (10 June 2026)

*The Fake News Media refuses to report how EFFECTIVE the U.S. Naval BLOCKADE is, the most successful Blockade in the history of Naval Warfare. NOTHING GETS THROUGH unless we want it to. IT IS A STEEL WALL! Iran is doing ZERO business, not paying their military, or any of their bills, and quickly becoming a FAILED NATION! Lots of oil is getting out. Praise be to Allah! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116725591109474316] (10 June 2026)

*Iran’s Military is a complete and total mess. Much of it, like their Navy and Air Force, doesn’t even exist anymore - They have been completely defeated. Iran is all talk and no action. The Bully of the Middle East is DEAD!!! They’ve taken too long to negotiate a deal that would have been great for them, now they will have to pay the price!!! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116725476229257491] (10 June 2026)

*Last month, I directed our Great U.S. Military to execute a secret mission to support Oil Tankers and other Commercial Ships through the Straight of Hormuz. Today, I am pleased to announce that this effort has resulted in more than 100 MILLION Barrels of Oil making its way through the Straight, and into the Open Market. More than 200 Commercial Ships have safely traveled through the Strait. This wildly successful effort is because the UNITED STATES of AMERICA CONTROLS the Strait of Hormuz — NOT Iran. Their military is defeated, and their economy is lost. It’s over for Iran! Thank you for your attention to this matter. President DONALD J. TRUMP&quot;
** [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-iran-oil-war-b2993489.html Trump to Iran: I just took your oil] ''Independent'' (10 June 2026)
*The United States will be hitting Iran (Whose Navy, Air Force, Radar, Anti Aircraft, and all other forms of Defense, together with most of its offensive capability, are GONE!), VERY HARD TONIGHT. At some point in the not too distant future, we will be taking Kharg Island, and other oil infrastructure points, and assume total control of their Oil and Gas Markets, much like we have with Venezuela, which is working out brilliantly for both Venezuela and the United States of America. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
**https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116731447139970106

*The Iranian regime will lose the zero-sum game it is playing. Any damage it inflicts on our allies in the Gulf will be paid for with funds extracted from Iranian Accounts. Any tolls paid to the Persian Gulf Strait Authority will be offset by funds extracted from their accounts. Every attack Iran launches will only deepen the economic and financial consequences it faces
** [[Scott Bessent]] in [https://nitter.poast.org/Osint613/status/2065076195729793113#m Tweet] (10 June 2026)

* The Deal with the Islamic Republic of Iran is now complete. {{br}} I hereby fully authorize the toll free opening of the Strait of Hormuz, and, simultaneously herewith, authorize the immediate removal of the United States Naval blockade.{{br}}'''Ships of the World, start your engines. Let the oil flow!'''
** Trump quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cj0grpyg4v1t &quot;Iran and US agree deal to end war as Trump says Strait of Hormuz will be reopened&quot;], ''BBC News''  (15 June 2026)

* The terms that Iran leaked out to the Fake News have NOTHING to do with the terms that were agreed to, in writing. What they said, including their weak and pathetic statement on having a deal, bears no relation to the truth. Very dishonorable people to deal with. With them, there is no such thing as dealing in good faith. AMAZING! Also, their totally rebuffed Drone attack last night against Indian Ships leaving the Hormuz Strait is TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE. They better get their act together, and FAST! President DONALD J. TRUMP
** [https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116737418354503074 Trump post] (Jun 12, 2026)

* If they do, they suffer unbelievable consequences... the ultimate consequences, Iran will not be permitted to develop, buy, or acquire one if they want to maintain a &quot;very good relationship&quot; with the United States.
** [https://english.tupaki.com/latest-news/trump-warning-iran-nuclear-deal-g7-statement-1492147 Trump] (Jun 16, 2026)

* If General Soleimani hadn't been killed, we probably wouldn't be talking right now. He was a mad genius. They will never be able to replace this ideologue
** [https://unn.ua/en/news/trump-called-the-liquidated-soleimani-a-mad-genius-and-linked-his-death-to-the-current-deal-with-iran Trump] (Jun 17, 2026)

* So many people forget that tough guys usually lead their country to the abyss. And, you know, all the tough guys, tough guys don't realize that this wasn't a three-month deal, this was years in the making. Do you know why? Because I killed General Soleimani.
** [https://unn.ua/en/news/trump-called-the-liquidated-soleimani-a-mad-genius-and-linked-his-death-to-the-current-deal-with-iran Trump] 
** [https://www.bnnbloomberg.ca/video/economics/2026/06/17/i-was-the-one-who-killed-general-soleimani-trump/ Trump]  (Jun 17, 2026)

* Iran's relationship with China is not that of a client or a commercial partner, but rather we should be partners in the strictest sense of the word, We are not simply a client or a commercial partner of China, but a true partner in every sense of the word
** [https://www.democrata.es/en/international/iran-claims-from-china-an-alliance-as-full-partners/ Qalibaf]  (Jun 17, 2026)

* As you have been informed, a memorandum of understanding was signed between the presidents of Iran and the United States of America.{{br}}In the course of reaching this stage, the officials in charge, out of sincere concern and goodwill, made extensive efforts—and of course, it was the American president who, out of desperation, used all kinds of leverage to bring this about.
** [[Mojtaba Khamenei]] quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c8j2ewl0dpxt &quot;US lifts naval blockade as Iran's supreme leader says Trump made deal 'out of desperation'&quot;], ''BBC News'' (Jun 17, 2026)

* We expect a complete ceasefire on all fronts, including [[Lebanon]], [[Hezbollah]], and Israel,
** Trump quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c8j2ewl0dpxt &quot;US lifts naval blockade as Iran's supreme leader says Trump made deal 'out of desperation'&quot;], ''BBC News'' (Jun 17, 2026)

* He's been an amazing prime minister, but we have a little dispute over Lebanon...we're the big partner and he's the small partner, that's true.
** Trump, referring to [[Bibi Netanyahu]], quoted in [https://www.aol.com/articles/trump-belittles-netanyahu-small-partner-163100000.html &quot;Trump belittles Netanyahu as 'small partner' after 'dispute' exposed between leaders&quot;], ''AOL'' (Jun 17, 2026)

* You don't have to knock down a building every time someone walks into it that's from Hezbollah.
** Trump quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crr8z4z2er9o &quot;https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crr8z4z2er9o&quot;], ''BBC News'' (Jun 18, 2026)

* It's not our money, it's their money, and we froze it. At a certain point in time, I guess we're going to have to give it back.
** Trump quoted on the return of Iranian assets frozen during the war in: [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crr8z4z2er9o &quot;https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crr8z4z2er9o&quot;], ''BBC News'' (Jun 18, 2026)

* The United States of America undertakes with regional partners to develop a definitive, mutually agreed plan with at least $300 billion for the reconstruction and economic development of the Islamic Republic of Iran. The mechanism for the implementation of this plan will be finalised as part of a final deal within 60 days.
** [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4gy700j0eko US-Iran memorandum of understanding in full], BBC News (Jun 18, 2026)

* The United States of America undertakes to make fully available for use the frozen or restricted funds and assets of the Islamic Republic of Iran upon the implementation of the MOU, the United States of America and the Islamic Republic of Iran will mutually agree on the procedures related to the release of these funds.
** [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4gy700j0eko US-Iran memorandum of understanding in full], BBC News (Jun 18, 2026)

* We’ve now fought a war, spent billions and billions of dollars, you know, put enormous strain on our military. A lot of people have died. And it feels like we’re back where we were before we started the war, except maybe a little bit worse off.
** [[Barack Obama]], [https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/obama-us-may-worse-now-iran-war-rcna350733 &quot;Obama says U.S. may be ‘worse off’ now than before Iran war&quot;], nbcnews.com (June 19, 2026)

*If they do, they suffer unbelievable consequences... the ultimate consequences, Iran will not be permitted to develop, buy, or acquire one if they want to maintain a &quot;very good relationship&quot; with the United States.
**[https://english.tupaki.com/latest-news/trump-warning-iran-nuclear-deal-g7-statement-1492147 Trump], ''Tupaki'' (June 17, 2026)

*If General Soleimani hadn't been killed, we probably wouldn't be talking right now. He was a mad genius. They will never be able to replace this ideologue
**[https://unn.ua/en/news/trump-called-the-liquidated-soleimani-a-mad-genius-and-linked-his-death-to-the-current-deal-with-iran Trump], ''UNN'' (June 17, 2026)

*So many people forget that tough guys usually lead their country to the abyss. And, you know, all the tough guys, tough guys don't realize that this wasn't a three-month deal, this was years in the making. Do you know why? Because I killed General Soleimani.
**[https://unn.ua/en/news/trump-called-the-liquidated-soleimani-a-mad-genius-and-linked-his-death-to-the-current-deal-with-iran Trump], ''UNN'' (June 17, 2026)
**  [https://www.bnnbloomberg.ca/video/economics/2026/06/17/i-was-the-one-who-killed-general-soleimani-trump/ Trump], ''BNN Bloomberg'' (June 17, 2026)

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long. I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits. We defeated them totally militarily. [Iran Deal] probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump] (June 18, 2026)

* They closed parliament so they could sign whatever they wanted.
**[[w:Hosseinali Shahriari|Hosseinali Shahriari]] quoted in [https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606196854 &quot;Iran MP says parliament was shut so officials could sign anything without oversight&quot;], ''Iran International'' (June 19, 2026)

*There will be NO TOLLS in the Hormuz Strait for 60 days during the Cease Fire Period, and there will be NO TOLLS after the 60 day period has expired, unless they are imposed by and for the United States of America, should the deal not be completed, for services rendered as the Guardian Angel to the countries of the Middle East for purposes of both past, present, and future reimbursement of costs. Thank you for your attention to this matter!!! President DJT
** [https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116784032456610294 Trump] (June 20, 2026)

* Entebbe showed that a free people, if they mobilize their courage and muster their strength and their will, they could overcome the worst tyranny.
**[https://www.jns.org/news/israel-news/netanyahu-iran-campaign-laid-groundwork-for-fall-of-the-regime Bibi], ''JNS'' (June 21, 2026)

* You close it, and you won't have a country. You won't even make it back to your fucking country. He better shape up. He better watch his mouth we'll take over the rest of the country.
** [https://www.kcra.com/article/jd-vance-highlights-progress-iran-peace-talks-despite-threats/71662466 Trump] 
** [https://www.nbcnews.com/world/iran/president-jd-vance-switzerland-iran-talks-trump-threatens-toll-rcna351033 ] (June 21, 2026)

*We attacked so many targets. The cumulative damage we caused to the &quot;Revolutionary Guards economy&quot; is not measured in millions, not in hundreds of millions, not even in tens of billions. It is measured in hundreds and hundreds of billions of dollars. It will take them a long time to recover. A long time
**Netanyahu [https://www.osint613.com/post/netanyahu-claims-massive-damage-to-irgc-14788] (June 21, 2026)

* The headline in the Corrupt and Failing New York Times: &quot;What Changed After Almost 4 Months of War? Analysts Say Not Much.&quot; REALLY? Their Military is DONE, their Navy is GONE, their Air Force is GONE, their Launching Pads, Missiles, Drones and Manufacturing of same, is almost GONE, their top two sets of Leaders are GONE, their Inflation is at 250%, their Economy is BROKEN, their Soldiers aren't being paid, the Hormuz Strait is OPEN, THE OIL IS GUSHING, and the U.S. Stock Market and Jobs are at record HIGHS. That's what's CHANGED, you corrupt and unethical cowards, and MORE!!! President DJT
** [https://www.akses.co.id/en/trump-threatens-lawsuit-new-york-times]
** [https://meidasnews.com/news/trump-calls-new-york-times-treasonous-for-coverage-of-iran-deal-threatens-lawsuit ]
** [https://sg.news.yahoo.com/trump-accuses-newspaper-treason-questioned-085459693.html Trump] (Jun 22, 2026)

* You make threats; we take action. The Strait of Hormuz is neither your private casino nor the backyard of modern pirates. These are Iranian sovereign waters, and the final decision belongs to the Iranian people and their armed forces.
** {{w|Ebrahim Azizi}} quoted in [https://www.ibtimes.co.uk/tensions-flare-strait-hormuz-us-iran-1804312 &quot;'The Strait of Hormuz Is Not Your Personal Casino': Iran Mocks Trump After Fresh Threat&quot;], ''IBTimes'' (June 22, 2026)

*I didnt say it will cause a depression, I said it could cause a depression. And I said I don't want to be Herbert Hoover… certainly a lot of bad things could happen, that could be one of the things, I don’t think it would… but if it did, if Iran doesn’t live up to the agreement, I will do what I have to do
**[https://www.al.com/politics/2026/06/reporters-stupid-question-gets-under-trumps-skin-as-president-pressed-on-iran-deal.html Trump] (June 22, 2026)

*Unfrozen assets on Iran will be used to buy food from our farmers.
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606223119 Trump] (June 22, 2026)

*How can one trust someone like that? And who even trusts the U.S.? Negotiations do not mean that we trust them
**[https://iranwire.com/en/news/154054-ejei-the-enemy-seeks-to-undermine-the-unity-of-the-iranian-people/ Ejei] (June 22, 2026)

*All that money's coming back in the form of purchases of food which they desperately need. They have 91 million people, they ​can't feed them. ​So, the money ⁠that we lift is going to go to our farmers
**[https://www.reuters.com/world/trump-i-will-do-what-i-have-do-if-iran-does-not-stick-deal-2026-06-22/ Trump] (June 22, 2026)

*What we told the Iranians yesterday is that when you guys engage in what us millennials might call trash talk, you can't expect the president of the United States not to respond and not to correct the record
**[https://abc7news.com/post/us-iran-wrap-second-day-talks-rough-start-trump-made-remarks-called-insulting-prompting-temporary-pause/19352630/ ] 
** [https://www.pbs.org/newshour/politics/vance-says-talks-with-iranian-officials-set-good-foundation-for-a-deal-to-end-the-war Vance] (June 22, 2026)

*I have agreed to allow the Hormuz Strait to remain OPEN, with no further Naval Blockade. However, all ships are remaining in place should it be necessary to reinstitute the Blockade, which seems, at this point, highly unlikely. The Mone and/or Sanctions that the U.S. Treasury is releasing goes into escrow, controlled by the U.S.A., and will be used for the purchase of food and medical supplies, exclusively from the United States, including Corn, Wheat, and Soybeans from our great American Farmers. These are things that are desperately needed by Iran. This is a humanitarian crisis, and I feel it is necessary to help, NOW, before it is too late. Talks are going well! Thank you for your attention to this matter. President DONALD J. TRUMP
** [https://ktul.com/news/nation-world/trump-says-iran-has-agreed-to-the-highest-level-of-nuclear-inspection-pakistan-truth-social-farmers-fake-news-hormuz-strait Trump] (June 23, 2026)

* America the Beautiful will NEVER be a Communist Country!!! President DJT
** [https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116803704330293684 Trump] (Jun 24, 2026)

* That’s an international waterway. There isn’t a nation on Earth that supports having to pay money to go through the [[w:Straight of Hormuz|Straits]].
** [[Marco Rubio]]  in [https://www.instagram.com/reel/DZ7_B3Ix_c1/]ʕ(Jun 25, 2026)


* The big Oil Companies are not dropping their price at the pump commensurate with the sharply lower prices they are paying for Oil. Those prices are dropping like a rock! In other words, customers are being “gouged.” I have instructed the DOJ to immediately start looking into this. Gasoline prices better start going down a lot faster than what I’m seeing! President DJT
**[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116803130747198847 Trump] (Jun 24, 2026)

*So, I have Iran on the “ropes,” ready to go down for the fall, willing to give us practically anything, and for the first time in decades, respecting the hell out of the United States and its President, ME, and the U.S. Senate decides to have a poorly timed and meaningless War Powers Act Vote, telling the Number One Sponser of Terror in the World that the United States doesn’t  like what I am doing to them, and I must stop, and by so doing has provided aid and comfort the Enemy. Four Republican Losers voted with the Dumocrats, and Iran asked my people, “what does that all mean?” These Senators have just made my job more difficult, but I will get it done, one way or the other, because I always get it done! President DJT
**[https://www.timesofisrael.com/liveblog_entry/trump-fumes-at-us-senate-for-passing-iran-war-powers-resolution/ Trump] (Jun 24, 2026)

*We have another one, a new market coming up, and that's called the lovely country of Iran.  It's a beautiful place. Would anybody like to go there? The Islamic Republic of Iran, they're having a hard time with food, and we're going to be taking some of their money and we'll spend it, and we're going to be buying wheat, soybeans and corn, a lot of it, and that process is going to be starting pretty soon.   It's going to be pretty big too.
**Trump [https://www.yahoo.com/news/politics/articles/trump-promises-farmers-sell-crops-120922994.html] (Jun 26, 2026)

* This is not a violation of the ceasefire; it is ceasefire management.
** {{w|Ebrahim Azizi}} quoted in [https://apnews.com/article/iran-us-israel-war-hormuz-strait-june-26-2026-8c1a77eb82d25f00de814958114c7296 &quot;US strikes Iran in response to a drone attack on a ship&quot;], ''AP News'' (June 27, 2026)

* They’re a little bit different.
** [[Donald Trump]], referring to Iran, quoted in [https://apnews.com/article/iran-us-israel-war-hormuz-strait-june-26-2026-8c1a77eb82d25f00de814958114c7296 &quot;US strikes Iran in response to a drone attack on a ship&quot;], ''AP News'' (June 27, 2026)

* Iran signed a ceasefire agreement. We have honored it. If they have disagreements about how the MOU is being applied, they can pick up the phone. But violence will be met with violence.
** [[JD Vance]] quoted in [https://apnews.com/article/iran-us-israel-war-hormuz-strait-june-26-2026-8c1a77eb82d25f00de814958114c7296 &quot;US strikes Iran in response to a drone attack on a ship&quot;], ''AP News'' (June 27, 2026)

*[Erdogan] He was a prime candidate to go into the war with Iran maybe on the Iran side, because he’s not a big fan of Israel , I asked him to stay out. He stayed out, Everything I’ve ever asked from him, he’s done.
**[https://www.timesofisrael.com/trump-claims-he-stopped-great-leader-erdogan-from-bringing-turkey-into-war-on-irans-side/ Trump](June 27, 2026)
==== Undated June ====

*''Leave this the region immediately.''
**IRGC-QF Ismaiel Qaani [https://www.shahrekhabar.com/news/178238580002751 ]

*The genocidal death cult headquartered in Tel Aviv is a threat to all of humanity. It threatens all humans. Its only interest is permanent war
**[https://nitter.poast.org/araghchi/status/2067946325069504513 Iraqchi]
*We live in a turbulent, stormy, barbaric Middle Eas I do not claim to be a prophet. But I think I know what determines survival in our region - and increasingly throughout the world: The strong survive. There is no place for the weak. They are preyed upon. They disappear
**Netanyahu https://nitter.poast.org/Osint613/status/2070177590883532942#m 

*''We must take over the trench from the launcher boys, lift people out of economic pressure and build the country   I'm not saying waste but so we can have our people have an easy life.China is unique, it must be made to believe by us we are full partner''
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606179173 Qalibaf] 

*For returning to normalcy , keeping societal mental health well being, pro government nightly gatherings must end. 
**[https://iranwire.com/fa/news-1/153960-%D9%88%D8%B2%D8%A7%D8%B1%D8%AA-%DA%A9%D8%B4%D9%88%D8%B1-%D8%AA%D8%AC%D9%85%D8%B9%D8%A7%D8%AA-%D8%B4%D8%A8%D8%A7%D9%86%D9%87-%D9%85%D8%AA%D9%88%D9%82%D9%81-%D8%B4%D9%88%D8%AF/ ]Minister of Interior

*Iran has been great - If Iran is reasonable, if they're smart. Otherwise, we'll have to finish the job which will take about maybe less than a week, but they’re going to be okay. I think they’re going to do what they have to do, because we want to have it done.
**[https://nypost.com/2026/06/23/us-news/trump-tells-pa-truck-workers-fat-drug-prices-coming-down-next-week-that-alone-should-win-the-midterms/ ]

*Who else could have done a blockade like that? I did a naval blockade where not one ship was able to get through. Some tried. It didn't last very long I haven't learned that lesson yet. I know there are, but there are no limits,we defeated them totally militarily,[Iran Deal] probably is unconditional surrender.
**[https://www.axios.com/2026/06/18/trump-iran-war-power-no-limits Trump]

*Iran has informed the U. S. that, despite troublemaking Fake News reporting to the contrary, there are “NO TOLLS, NO INSURANCE COSTS, &amp; NO OTHER CHARGES OF ANY KIND BEING SOUGHT OR RECEIVED BY IRAN ON SHIPS TRAVELING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ. If this is false information, negotiations would end, immediately! Additionally, no money has been given to Iran, or released from their money to them, by the U. S. We will be releasing some of their money, that is totally controlled by us, to our Farmers and Ranchers, for the purchase of Corn, Wheat, Soybeans, and more. Food is desperately needed in Iran, and we will be purchasing it for them exclusively from the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP

*''We have given our own 20 million oil barrels to IRGC-AF aerospace force to spend to be able to fight otherwise they couldn't, security council is the only place where decision of unity was made , chief of headquarters was there , army and IRGC heads commanders were there , chief of security was there, they all said same thing , we all accepted this path we are going to go, no joke , everyone agreed now we sat and thought this'' 
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/202606218789 Dr Pezeshkian]

===July===
* Any failure to comply, deviation from the designated route, or disregard for the navigation protocols of the Islamic Republic of Iran in the Strait of Hormuz will be met with an immediate and forceful response from the armed forces, endangering the security of the violating vessels.
** Iranian regime statement: [https://apnews.com/article/iran-strait-hormuz-oil-route-us-shipping-de981ef87afe8da617076fe494c37482 &quot;Iran warns oil tankers to use approved routes in Strait of Hormuz or face a ‘forceful response’&quot;], ''AP News'' (July 2, 2026)

*Because they've had their own way for 47 years. Like if you're a spoiled child and you've had your way for many years with your parents, and all of a sudden they come down hard on you, it takes you a little while to get used to it. They've had their way for 47 years. They pushed everywhere. They were known as the bully of the Middle East. They pushed the countries around, and they pushed the United States around, because we had presidents that weren't willing to do – look, Barack Obama paid them to try and keep them in line. Gave them 1.7 billion in cash. You remember that, because you reported that
**[https://www.cnbc.com/2026/07/02/cnbc-transcript-president-donald-trump-speaks-with-cnbcs-joe-kernen-today-.html Trump] (2 July 2026)

*Imagine having forty-something million of your own citizens on food stamps and calling another nation hungry
**Ghalibaf[https://en.mehrnews.com/news/245880/Mind-your-malnutrition-rates-Ghalibaf-to-Trump ] (4 July 2026)

*I hope it does not come to that, but all countries seeking conflict in the region should remember this, Hormuz Strait is no less important than a nuclear weapon.
**[https://wanaen.com/medvedev-iran-has-a-more-powerful-strategic-lever-than-the-strait-of-hormuz/ Medvedev] (4 July 2026)
*We were peak, we didn't understand now we won't be
**[https://www.iranintl.com/202607045281 Nikzad](4 July 2026)

* We're ready for giving all our nationals interest for avenging Shaheed Supreme Imam Leader Khamenei.
**[https://www.asriran.com/fa/news/1175129/%D9%BE%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%87%DB%8C%D8%A7%D9%86-%D9%85%D8%A7-%D8%AD%D8%A7%D8%B6%D8%B1%DB%8C%D9%85-%D8%AA%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D9%85%D9%86%D8%A7%D9%81%D8%B9-%D9%85%D9%84%DB%8C-%D8%AE%D9%88%D8%AF%D9%85%D9%88%D9%86-%D8%B1%D9%88-%D8%AF%D8%B1-%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%87-%D8%A7%D9%86%D8%AA%D9%82%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%85-%D8%B4%D9%87%DB%8C%D8%AF%D9%85%D8%A7%D9%86-%D8%A8%D8%AF%D9%87%DB%8C%D9%85 Panahian] (4 July 2026)

* I'd rather make a deal because I don't want to affect 91 million people. We can knock down their bridges in one hour.{{Br}}We can knock out their energy supply, all of those big plants that they built, big, beautiful, modern plants that had a lot of money. They don't have any money now. We haven't given them any money.{{Br}}We can knock out their electricity and power-generating plants in, I would say, a small part of an afternoon. Every plant will be gone, and they know that.
**[https://www.iranintl.com/en/liveblog/202607049017 Trump] (6 July 2026)

* The famous Strait of Hormuz -- nobody ever heard of it, but that is some big money machine, I'll tell you what
** [https://www.osint613.com/post/trump-comments-strait-of-hormuz-16154 Trump] (6 July 2026)

* I don't want to deal with them anymore, they're scum. You know what scum is? They're scum. They're sick people. They're led by sick people. And they're vicious, violent people.{{Br}}And if they had a nuclear weapon, they'd use it. As far as I'm concerned it's over.{{Br}}I'll speak to our negotiators, they want to negotiate, they're good people. Steve Witkoff, Jared Kushner, but they have to come back to me. As far as I'm concerned, it's just a waste of time dealing with them. They're liars.
** Trump quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c17y1vnn2qxt &quot;Trump threatens Iran and says truce is over, as Iranian minister warns of 'fearless' response&quot;], ''BBC News'' (8 July 2026)

* Addressing the civilised and courageous nation of Iran with derogatory language does not diminish its greatness.{{Br}}Iranians are known for their civility, culture, and strong moral values.{{Br}}We do not answer vulgarity with vulgarity, but with action: fearlessly and with great valour.
** {{w|Abbas Araghchi}} quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c17y1vnn2qxt &quot;Trump threatens Iran and says truce is over, as Iranian minister warns of 'fearless' response&quot;], ''BBC News'' (8 July 2026)

* We bombed the hell out of them last night.
** Trump in: [https://apnews.com/article/iran-usa-united-arab-emirates-attack-0764d17c09370a8c5cf1e8197a8878ab &quot;The US launches more strikes on Iran as the standoff over the Strait of Hormuz escalates&quot;], ''AP News'' (12 July 2026)

* The era of one-sided deals is OVER. We told you: keep your word or pay the price. Reality is knocking.
** {{w|Mohammad Bagher Qalibaf}} in: [https://apnews.com/article/iran-usa-united-arab-emirates-attack-0764d17c09370a8c5cf1e8197a8878ab &quot;The US launches more strikes on Iran as the standoff over the Strait of Hormuz escalates&quot;], ''AP News'' (12 July 2026)

* The Hormuz Strait is OPEN, and will remain OPEN, with or without Iran. We are reinstating the THE IRANIAN BLOCKADE, so named because it is only stopping Iran’s ships or customers from entering or leaving. All other countries will have fair and open use of the Strait.{{Br}}The U.S.A. will be, from this point forward, known as 'THE GUARDIAN OF THE HORMUZ STRAIT,' but as such, and as a matter of FAIRNESS, will be reimbursed, at the rate of 20% on all cargo shipped, for any and all costs necessary to do the job of providing safety and security to this very volatile section of the World. The process and formation will begin immediately.
** Trump quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cwy30p89rlgt &quot;Trump reinstates Iran port blockade and imposes 20% charge on cargo passing through Hormuz&quot;], ''BBC News'' (13 July 2026)

* I have decided to replace the 20% United States Reimbursement Fee with Trade and Investment Deals that the various Gulf States will be making into the United States.{{Br}}Those Investments will be MASSIVE but, at the same time, extraordinarily good for them, and their future.
** Trump quoted in [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cy0608wy8pro &quot;Trump scraps threat of 20% fee on Hormuz cargo as US resumes blockade of Iran ports&quot;], ''BBC News'' (14 July 2026)

== See also ==
* [[Iran]]
* [[Israel]]
* [[Middle East]]
* [[Second presidency of Donald Trump]]
* [[Might makes right]]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons category}}
* [https://www.bbc.com BBC coverage of 2026 Iran conflict]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news Al Jazeera: Iran crisis coverage]

[[Category:2026]]
[[Category:2020s in Iran]]
[[Category:Wars and battles]]
[[Category:Arab-Israeli conflict]]</text>
      <sha1>1swmfyudmv9crzxzzpb5m6c5j7blf3l</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Claws for Alarm</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>306039</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964940</id>
      <parentid>3951062</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:08:00Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964940</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1248" sha1="okvv4ae083hoej3zp8c1trge6bcuzyr" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Claws for Alarm title card.png]]
'''''[[w:Claws for Alarm|Claws for Alarm]]''''' is a 1954 [[w:Warner Bros.|Warner Bros.]] ''[[w:Merrie Melodies|Merrie Melodies]]'' cartoon that was released on May 22, 1954. This theatrical cartoon was directed by [[w:Chuck Jones|Charles M. Jones]] and starred [[w:Mel Blanc|Mel Blanc]] playing the voice of [[Porky Pig]].

==Porky Pig==
* ''[to Sylvester]'' What is the matter with you? What are you? A schizophre... a schizodephre... a-a manic depressive or something?
* ''[after Sylvester wrestles a stuffed moose that's trying to shoot Porky Pig]'' Sy-sy-sylvester! What are you trying to do, wake everybody in the house? Of all the screwball ideas. Fighting with stuffed animals.

==Voice cast==
* [[w:Mel Blanc|Mel Blanc]] as [[Porky Pig]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0046862}}

{{Looney Tunes}}

[[Category:1954 animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Porky Pig cartoons]]
[[Category:Sylvester cartoons]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Chuck Jones]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Chuck Jones films]]</text>
      <sha1>okvv4ae083hoej3zp8c1trge6bcuzyr</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964941</id>
      <parentid>3964940</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:08:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964941</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1290" sha1="38i4pneekwjg00bjb7a2yoyqgoshmjn" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
[[File:Claws for Alarm title card.png]]
'''''[[w:Claws for Alarm|Claws for Alarm]]''''' is a 1954 [[w:Warner Bros.|Warner Bros.]] ''[[w:Merrie Melodies|Merrie Melodies]]'' cartoon that was released on May 22, 1954. This theatrical cartoon was directed by [[w:Chuck Jones|Charles M. Jones]] and starred [[w:Mel Blanc|Mel Blanc]] playing the voice of [[Porky Pig]].

==Porky Pig==
* ''[to Sylvester]'' What is the matter with you? What are you? A schizophre... a schizodephre... a-a manic depressive or something?
* ''[after Sylvester wrestles a stuffed moose that's trying to shoot Porky Pig]'' Sy-sy-sylvester! What are you trying to do, wake everybody in the house? Of all the screwball ideas. Fighting with stuffed animals.

==Voice cast==
* [[w:Mel Blanc|Mel Blanc]] as [[Porky Pig]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0046862}}

{{Looney Tunes}}

[[Category:1954 animated films]]
[[Category:1954 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Porky Pig cartoons]]
[[Category:Sylvester cartoons]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Chuck Jones]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Chuck Jones films]]</text>
      <sha1>38i4pneekwjg00bjb7a2yoyqgoshmjn</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Regular Show: The Lost Tapes</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>307198</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965030</id>
      <parentid>3961694</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:43:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39683-94</username>
        <id>3350039</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Corpse Flower */</comment>
      <origin>3965030</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3906" sha1="sn6i0lfox7tfsaeviaf2o4x0rq2w70r" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Regular Show (season 1)|1]] [[Regular Show (season 2)|2]] [[Regular Show (season 3)|3]] [[Regular Show (season 4)|4]] [[Regular Show (season 5)|5]] [[Regular Show (season 6)|6]] [[Regular Show (season 7)|7]] [[Regular Show (season 8)|8]] | [[Regular Show: The Movie|Film]] | [[Regular Show: The Lost Tapes|The Lost Tapes]] | [[Regular Show|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Regular Show: The Lost Tapes}}''''' (2026–present) is an animated series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] and a revival of ''[[Regular Show]]''.
{{tv-stub}}

==Episodes==
===''Fix That Tape''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Skips' Luau''===
&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:''[Mordecai and Rigby are driving in the cart, connected to a trailer holding piles of trash bags]''
:'''Rigby''': Dude, can't you drive any faster? We gotta dump this trizz-ash at the dizz-ump, so we can go to Skips' luau!
:'''Mordecai''': Oh, yeah! Gonna cool down in luau town!
:'''Rigby''': We gonna lu up, down and around!
:''[Mordecai and Rigby start rapping]''
:'''Mordecai''': Take the trash to the dump and drive a bit further!
:'''Rigby''': T-to take a bite of the luau burger!
:'''Mordecai''': Luau!
:''[Mordecai and Rigby hula dance with their arms]''
:'''Both''': Luau!

&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:'''Benson''': You know what? You two just got your wheel privileges revoked! And I'd better not see you two at Skips's luau until all this trash is at the dump!
:'''Mordecai''': But that's all the way on the other side of the park!
:'''Benson''': Not my problem.

&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:'''Rigby''' : Well, I hope you guys saved us some nice, big, juicy--
:'''Benson''': You two better clean up this mess, '''OR''' '''''YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!'''''
:''[He walks away as Rigby picks up two luau burgers from the ground]''
:'''Rigby''': Dude, check it out!
:''[Rigby gives one to Mordecai and they start eating their luau burgers]''
:'''Mordecai''': Totally worth it.

===''Blade Games''===
:''[Mordecai and Rigby groan as Benson turns off the TV]''
:'''Benson''': '''GET TO WORK RIGHT NOW!'''
:'''Mordecai &amp; Rigby''': Fine.

===''Nap Spot''===
:'''Pops''': Oh, my! Someone's feeling themselves.
:'''Hi Five Ghost''': Yeah, nice duds, dudes!
:'''Skips''': It's too much denim.
:'''Benson''': I just don't have the bandwidth today.

===''Coffee Shop Wars''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Boba or Bo-Bust''===
''[Benson is confronting Mordecai and Rigby after the duo put in a lot of boxes of boba supplies inside the Snack Shack]''

'''Benson''': Where are all the snacks?!

'''Mordecai''': Geez, chill Benson. We got something way better.

'''Rigby''': ''[pulls out a cup of boba]'' Yeah, at least try it before you freak out! ''[gives the boba to Benson. Benson takes it and drinks it, but he then spits it out]''

'''Benson''': Why are there balls in my mouth?!

'''Rigby''': That's the boba!

'''Mordecai''': It's the future.

'''Benson''': l didn't tell you to buy the future. I told you, to buy what was on the list. Take it back right now, and get the other snacks.

'''Mordecai''': Oooh.... we can't. It was final sale.

'''Benson''': ''[angrily]'' UGH!! If you don't sell every single ball of boba and make back the money you spent by the end of the week, &lt;big&gt;YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;

===''Corpse Flower''===
:'''Mordecai''': ''[on the phone with Rigby]'' Dude, Margaret's freaking out. She's wedged between two book shelves! ''[Margaret has wedged herself between two book shelves, looking incredibly stressed]'' Where are you guys?
:'''Rigby''': ''[on the phone]'' I'm working on it, but this stupid flower's messing with my plan!
:'''Mordecai''': Ditch the plan, man. Do the best you can with the tools you have.

===''Beginson''===
===''Good Mitch Spiking''===
===''Stilt Walkers''===
:'''Eileen''': That was horrible!
:'''CJ''': I didn't know Rigby's dad was such a jerkwad.

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:Regular Show]]</text>
      <sha1>sn6i0lfox7tfsaeviaf2o4x0rq2w70r</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965036</id>
      <parentid>3965030</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:50:53Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39683-94</username>
        <id>3350039</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Stilt Walkers */</comment>
      <origin>3965036</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4410" sha1="qvmqjg5flb0eoi05h7q2smsi2y2ezao" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Regular Show (season 1)|1]] [[Regular Show (season 2)|2]] [[Regular Show (season 3)|3]] [[Regular Show (season 4)|4]] [[Regular Show (season 5)|5]] [[Regular Show (season 6)|6]] [[Regular Show (season 7)|7]] [[Regular Show (season 8)|8]] | [[Regular Show: The Movie|Film]] | [[Regular Show: The Lost Tapes|The Lost Tapes]] | [[Regular Show|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Regular Show: The Lost Tapes}}''''' (2026–present) is an animated series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] and a revival of ''[[Regular Show]]''.
{{tv-stub}}

==Episodes==
===''Fix That Tape''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Skips' Luau''===
&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:''[Mordecai and Rigby are driving in the cart, connected to a trailer holding piles of trash bags]''
:'''Rigby''': Dude, can't you drive any faster? We gotta dump this trizz-ash at the dizz-ump, so we can go to Skips' luau!
:'''Mordecai''': Oh, yeah! Gonna cool down in luau town!
:'''Rigby''': We gonna lu up, down and around!
:''[Mordecai and Rigby start rapping]''
:'''Mordecai''': Take the trash to the dump and drive a bit further!
:'''Rigby''': T-to take a bite of the luau burger!
:'''Mordecai''': Luau!
:''[Mordecai and Rigby hula dance with their arms]''
:'''Both''': Luau!

&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:'''Benson''': You know what? You two just got your wheel privileges revoked! And I'd better not see you two at Skips's luau until all this trash is at the dump!
:'''Mordecai''': But that's all the way on the other side of the park!
:'''Benson''': Not my problem.

&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:'''Rigby''' : Well, I hope you guys saved us some nice, big, juicy--
:'''Benson''': You two better clean up this mess, '''OR''' '''''YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!'''''
:''[He walks away as Rigby picks up two luau burgers from the ground]''
:'''Rigby''': Dude, check it out!
:''[Rigby gives one to Mordecai and they start eating their luau burgers]''
:'''Mordecai''': Totally worth it.

===''Blade Games''===
:''[Mordecai and Rigby groan as Benson turns off the TV]''
:'''Benson''': '''GET TO WORK RIGHT NOW!'''
:'''Mordecai &amp; Rigby''': Fine.

===''Nap Spot''===
:'''Pops''': Oh, my! Someone's feeling themselves.
:'''Hi Five Ghost''': Yeah, nice duds, dudes!
:'''Skips''': It's too much denim.
:'''Benson''': I just don't have the bandwidth today.

===''Coffee Shop Wars''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Boba or Bo-Bust''===
''[Benson is confronting Mordecai and Rigby after the duo put in a lot of boxes of boba supplies inside the Snack Shack]''

'''Benson''': Where are all the snacks?!

'''Mordecai''': Geez, chill Benson. We got something way better.

'''Rigby''': ''[pulls out a cup of boba]'' Yeah, at least try it before you freak out! ''[gives the boba to Benson. Benson takes it and drinks it, but he then spits it out]''

'''Benson''': Why are there balls in my mouth?!

'''Rigby''': That's the boba!

'''Mordecai''': It's the future.

'''Benson''': l didn't tell you to buy the future. I told you, to buy what was on the list. Take it back right now, and get the other snacks.

'''Mordecai''': Oooh.... we can't. It was final sale.

'''Benson''': ''[angrily]'' UGH!! If you don't sell every single ball of boba and make back the money you spent by the end of the week, &lt;big&gt;YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;

===''Corpse Flower''===
:'''Mordecai''': ''[on the phone with Rigby]'' Dude, Margaret's freaking out. She's wedged between two book shelves! ''[Margaret has wedged herself between two book shelves, looking incredibly stressed]'' Where are you guys?
:'''Rigby''': ''[on the phone]'' I'm working on it, but this stupid flower's messing with my plan!
:'''Mordecai''': Ditch the plan, man. Do the best you can with the tools you have.

===''Beginson''===
===''Good Mitch Spiking''===
===''Stilt Walkers''===
:'''Eileen''': Jeez, that was horrible.
:'''CJ''': I didn't know Rigby's dad was such a jerkwad.
:'''Mordecai''': No wonder he started freaking out when we said his ideas stink. ''[facepalms]'' Ugh! There's ''stilts'' time to go find him.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Looks great, dude. Also, you probably should, like, go to talk to your dad.
:'''Rigby''': Hmm. ''[shows up at his childhood home where his father is in the living watching TV; kicks the remote out of his hand with one of the stilts]'' No, '''''your''''' ideas stink! ''[storms out of the house, closing the front door]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:Regular Show]]</text>
      <sha1>qvmqjg5flb0eoi05h7q2smsi2y2ezao</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965048</id>
      <parentid>3965036</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:47:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Bszabo15</username>
        <id>1085757</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Stilt Walkers */</comment>
      <origin>3965048</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4418" sha1="mop0qdjocb9mou5wv9tn20ewxz0vejo" xml:space="preserve">----
:'''Seasons:'''  [[Regular Show (season 1)|1]] [[Regular Show (season 2)|2]] [[Regular Show (season 3)|3]] [[Regular Show (season 4)|4]] [[Regular Show (season 5)|5]] [[Regular Show (season 6)|6]] [[Regular Show (season 7)|7]] [[Regular Show (season 8)|8]] | [[Regular Show: The Movie|Film]] | [[Regular Show: The Lost Tapes|The Lost Tapes]] | [[Regular Show|Main]]
----
{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Regular Show: The Lost Tapes}}''''' (2026–present) is an animated series produced by [[w:Cartoon Network|Cartoon Network]] and a revival of ''[[Regular Show]]''.
{{tv-stub}}

==Episodes==
===''Fix That Tape''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Skips' Luau''===
&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:''[Mordecai and Rigby are driving in the cart, connected to a trailer holding piles of trash bags]''
:'''Rigby''': Dude, can't you drive any faster? We gotta dump this trizz-ash at the dizz-ump, so we can go to Skips' luau!
:'''Mordecai''': Oh, yeah! Gonna cool down in luau town!
:'''Rigby''': We gonna lu up, down and around!
:''[Mordecai and Rigby start rapping]''
:'''Mordecai''': Take the trash to the dump and drive a bit further!
:'''Rigby''': T-to take a bite of the luau burger!
:'''Mordecai''': Luau!
:''[Mordecai and Rigby hula dance with their arms]''
:'''Both''': Luau!

&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:'''Benson''': You know what? You two just got your wheel privileges revoked! And I'd better not see you two at Skips's luau until all this trash is at the dump!
:'''Mordecai''': But that's all the way on the other side of the park!
:'''Benson''': Not my problem.

&lt;hr width=100%/&gt;
:'''Rigby''' : Well, I hope you guys saved us some nice, big, juicy--
:'''Benson''': You two better clean up this mess, '''OR''' '''''YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!'''''
:''[He walks away as Rigby picks up two luau burgers from the ground]''
:'''Rigby''': Dude, check it out!
:''[Rigby gives one to Mordecai and they start eating their luau burgers]''
:'''Mordecai''': Totally worth it.

===''Blade Games''===
:''[Mordecai and Rigby groan as Benson turns off the TV]''
:'''Benson''': '''GET TO WORK RIGHT NOW!'''
:'''Mordecai &amp; Rigby''': Fine.

===''Nap Spot''===
:'''Pops''': Oh, my! Someone's feeling themselves.
:'''Hi Five Ghost''': Yeah, nice duds, dudes!
:'''Skips''': It's too much denim.
:'''Benson''': I just don't have the bandwidth today.

===''Coffee Shop Wars''===
{{Section-stub}}

===''Boba or Bo-Bust''===
''[Benson is confronting Mordecai and Rigby after the duo put in a lot of boxes of boba supplies inside the Snack Shack]''

'''Benson''': Where are all the snacks?!

'''Mordecai''': Geez, chill Benson. We got something way better.

'''Rigby''': ''[pulls out a cup of boba]'' Yeah, at least try it before you freak out! ''[gives the boba to Benson. Benson takes it and drinks it, but he then spits it out]''

'''Benson''': Why are there balls in my mouth?!

'''Rigby''': That's the boba!

'''Mordecai''': It's the future.

'''Benson''': l didn't tell you to buy the future. I told you, to buy what was on the list. Take it back right now, and get the other snacks.

'''Mordecai''': Oooh.... we can't. It was final sale.

'''Benson''': ''[angrily]'' UGH!! If you don't sell every single ball of boba and make back the money you spent by the end of the week, &lt;big&gt;YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!&lt;/big&gt;

===''Corpse Flower''===
:'''Mordecai''': ''[on the phone with Rigby]'' Dude, Margaret's freaking out. She's wedged between two book shelves! ''[Margaret has wedged herself between two book shelves, looking incredibly stressed]'' Where are you guys?
:'''Rigby''': ''[on the phone]'' I'm working on it, but this stupid flower's messing with my plan!
:'''Mordecai''': Ditch the plan, man. Do the best you can with the tools you have.

===''Beginson''===
===''Good Mitch Spiking''===
===''Stilt Walkers''===
:'''Eileen''': Jeez, that was horrible.
:'''CJ''': I didn't know Rigby's dad was such a jerkwad.
:'''Mordecai''': No wonder he started freaking out when we said his ideas stink. ''[facepalms]'' Ugh! There's ''stilts'' time to go find him.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;&gt;
:'''Mordecai''': Looks great, dude. Also, you probably should, like, go to talk to your dad.
:'''Rigby''': Hmm. ''[shows up at his childhood home where his father, Sherm, is in the living watching TV; kicks the remote out of his hand with one of the stilts]'' No, '''''your''''' ideas stink! ''[storms out of the house, closing the front door]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:Regular Show]]</text>
      <sha1>mop0qdjocb9mou5wv9tn20ewxz0vejo</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Project Hail Mary</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>307264</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965266</id>
      <parentid>3964205</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:07:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Vanguard Man</username>
        <id>3294029</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <origin>3965266</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="10928" sha1="dpeu5o7bq7edrduhxjhyl6xig29oykz" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Project Hail Mary (2026) Logo.png|thumb|Believe in the Hail Mary]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Project Hail Mary (film)|Project Hail Mary]]''''' is a 2026 American [[w:epic film|epic]] [[w:science fiction film|science fiction film]], about middle school science teacher Ryland Grace (Ryan Gosling) who wakes up on a spaceship light-years from home with no recollection of who he is or how he got there. As his memory returns, he begins to uncover his mission: to solve the riddle of the mysterious substance that is causing the sun to die out. He must call on his scientific knowledge and unorthodox ideas to save everything on Earth from extinction... but an unexpected friendship means he may not have to do it alone.
:''Directed by [[w:Phil Lord|Phil Lord]] and [[w:Christopher Miller|Christopher Miller]] and screenplay adapted by [[w:Drew Goddard|Drew Goddard]], based on [[w:Andy Weir|Andy Weir]]'s [[w:Project Hail Mary|2021 novel of the same name]].''
{{center|'''Believe in the Hail Mary.'''&lt;small&gt;([[#Taglines|taglines]])&lt;/small&gt;}}

==Ryland Grace==
* [''In video recording'']
* Rocky's growing on me! At least he's not growing ''IN'' me, which was a concern for a while...
* I always wanted to be... mysterious. Talk too much. It's my problem. Like right now.
* Rocky, my hand is up. We can't just show up in a space ball unannounced and move into someone else's spaceship. Right? There has to be boundaries.
* There's nothing she can't do
* [''Whispering to camera''] He tells me what to do, he tells me why to do it, he tells me how to do it, he tells me when to do it, and then when I do it, he's like, &quot;what are you doing?&quot;
* [''Watches a new package being thrown from &quot;Blip A&quot; after the first one bounced off the Hail Mary's hull''] Why is it moving so much slower than the last one? [''Sighs and closes eyes''] They think I'm dumb.
* Guys! This is first contact! With life! Outside of the, uh oh. Oh... it died.
* Carl and I made a mini-Venus out of a plywood box and as soon as the samples recognized the, uh, spectral signature of CO2 they were... they were like &quot;whoop, there it is!&quot;
* Wow! You're not gonna believe this. Nothing happened!
* The astrophage consumes the sun's energy and then they expel it for propulsion. They toot to scoot, basically.
* Okay buddy, I watch you sleep, but you have to wake up.
* Carl and I made a baby!
* We’re fathers, Carl!

==Eva Stratt==
* [''Looking at Ryland Grace while singing''] Remember, everything will be alright. We can meet again somewhere. Somewhere far away from here. And that is enough.
* This might seem like me betraying you, but this is actually me believing in you.
* You're smart. You'll figure it out.

==Rocky==
* Rocky watch whole crew die. Could not fix. Grace say Grace will die. Rocky fix.
* Amaze. Amaze. Amaze.
* Fist my bump.
* Rocky hate Mark.
* Grumpy. Angry. Stupid. How long since last sleep, question?
* Grace Rocky save stars.
* It is time go.
* Time go fishing, question?

==Carl==
* You know who you are. You're going to do great.

==Dialogue==
:'''Ryland Grace''': I put the 'not' in astronaut! I've never done a space walk, I can't even moonwalk! I haven't done any training, I haven't done the whole... the pool thing!
:'''Olesya Ilyukhina''': No, no, no. That is just what we do for the picture, for social media.
:'''Ryland Grace''': I'm not heroic in any way. I get sick on an elevator!
:'''Yao''': Perfect. There's no elevator on the ship.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': You have a mate. How long you been together?
:'''Rocky''': 186.3 years.
:'''Ryland Grace''': It's like, the honeymoon phase.
:'''Rocky''': No understand.
:'''Ryland Grace''': That's a joke, Rock, it's a long time. You've been together a long time.
:'''Rocky''': Is not enough.

----
:'''Rocky''': Words of encouragement.
:'''Ryland Grace''': You can't just say &quot;words of encouragement!&quot;
:'''Rocky''': Words of GREAT encouragement!

----
:'''Rocky''': We leave now, question?
:'''Ryland Grace''': Leave now. Statement.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': Commander Yao, I really appreciate what you all are doing.
:'''Yao''': I mean, you would do the same.
:'''Ryland Grace''': I would choose just not to go at all. I don't have the bravery gene that you all have.
:'''Yao''': Trust me. It's not a gene. You just need to find someone to be brave for.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': [''Whispering''] There's no way you can hear me right now.
:'''Rocky''': Can hear.

----
:'''Rocky''': Dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty! Why room so messy, question?
:'''Ryland Grace''': Well, I wasn't expecting ''company'', was I?!
:'''Rocky''': This room for garbage? Ohh!

----
:'''Rocky''': How do you know when the hug is done?
:'''Ryland Grace''': You just feel it.
:'''Rocky''': Oh, are you feeling it now?
:'''Ryland Grace''': Nope.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': We can't just show up in a spaceball unannounced and move into someone else's spaceship, right? There has to be boundaries.
:'''Rocky''': Boundaries.
:'''Ryland Grace''': We have one mission.
:'''Rocky''': Mission.
:'''Ryland Grace''': But we're two distinct individuals.
:'''Rocky''': Individuals.
:'''Ryland Grace''': Both working on our distinct, individual parts of that mission.
:'''Rocky''': Mission.
:'''Ryland Grac'''e: Separately.
:'''Rocky''': Separately.
:'''Ryland Grace''': Ok.
:'''Rocky''': Where my bedroom?!
:'''Ryland Grace''': ''Bedroom?!'' For what?

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': I need to get into orbit or we'll crash!
:'''Rocky''': I have an idea. First, no crash. Then, no explode. Deal?
:'''Ryland Grace''': [''Thumbs down''] Deal!

----
:'''Hardware Store Cashier''': Which government?
:'''Carl''': All of them.

----
:'''Rocky: You are very brave.
:'''Ryland Grace: I don't know about that.
:'''Rocky''': You are bravest human I have ever met.
:'''Ryland Grace''': Hey!
:'''Rocky''': Is joke!
:'''Ryland Grace''': I know.
:'''Rocky''': I only meet one human. And it's you!
:'''Ryland Grace''': I get it.
:'''Rocky''': It's good joke.
:'''Ryland Grace''': Good joke.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': It took, like, 200 years to figure out how bacteria works, so...
:'''Eva Stratt''': Please do it faster.

----
:'''Eva Stratt''': The consensus here is that it would be preferable if you did not die.
:'''Ryland Grace''': Thanks, guys.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': I'm gonna go to sleep.
:'''Rocky''': Mm, no understand word.
:'''Ryland Grace''': Sleep? Uh, just uh, you go like this. [''Lies down'']
:'''Rocky''': [''Panicked''] D-d-died? Is died? Died?
:'''Ryland Grace''': No...
:'''Rocky''': No no no no no!
:'''Ryland Grace''': Not died, just laying here for 29,000 seconds and then we... wake up.
:'''Rocky''': Oh... understand.

----
:'''Eva Stratt''': Do you stand by what you wrote?
:'''Ryland Grace''': I was fired for standing by what I wrote.
:'''Eva Stratt''': You were fired for calling the leading scholar in your field a &quot;staggering waste of carbon&quot; at the UNESCO conference in Denmark.

----
:'''Rocky''': I thought you made peace, question?
:'''Ryland Grace''': I didn't mean any of that. That's just something you say.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': [''Rreading from computer''] Fist my bump? No. It's fist bump.
:'''Rocky''': [''On computer''] Is same.
:'''Ryland Grace''': It's not the same.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': So, you really think all this is going to work?
:'''Eva Stratt''': God willing.
:'''Ryland Grace''': You believe in God?
:'''Eva Stratt''': Beats the alternative.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': We have 1,009 of these Little Engines That Could on the Hail Mary, and, uh...
:'''Yao''': [in Mandarin] This guy speaks like a child.
:'''Eva Stratt''': [''In Mandarin'] It doesn't matter, you'll get used to it.
:'''Yao''': Okay.
:'''Eva Stratt''': [''Whispering''] You're doing great.
:'''Ryland Grace''': [''Whispering''] What?

----
:'''Rocky''': What is Grace doing, question?
:'''Ryland Grace''': [softly] I'm having a moment.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': Imagine, for a second, that you're an interstellar microorganism.
:'''Carl''': I'm not doing that.

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': Carl and I made a baby.
:'''Eva Stratt''': [''Over phone''] ... What?

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': You'll find a solution.
:'''Eva Stratt''': You are my solution.

----
:'''Rocky''': Close the door!
:'''Ryland Grace''': Why? I thought you said it was a safe neighborhood!
:'''Rocky''': I make door, you close door!

----
:'''Rocky''': More! No, no, no, left! Be left, more left, more left! Is perfect! No, wrong.
:'''Mary''': Erratic maneuver detected.
:'''Rocky''': No. Wrong way, wrong way. Wrong angle, bad, bad, bad. Good, good, good! Good! Bad, not enough, not enough. Too much, too much, too much!
:'''Ryland Grace''': I'm barely pulling it!
:'''Rocky''': Left, left, left! No, is bad. Grace Rocky dead. All Rocky plural, all Earth die, we die, we die.

----
:'''Rocky''': Grace look ''disgust'' when eat!
:'''Ryland Grace''': How do you look when you eat?
:'''Rocky''': It look beautiful!
:'''Ryland Grace''': Show me.
:'''Rocky''': [''Proceeds to demonstrate'']
:'''Ryland Grace''': Oh my god! [''Tries not to gag'']

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': *Whispering to video log* He has incredible hearing. He can see through walls. Personal space is at a premium...
:'''Rocky''': Who is Grace talking to, question?

----
:'''Rocky''': [''To recording''] Hello, Earth. Plan is like fishing. We get very close to Adrian atmosphere and lower collector into clouds with chain. Then Grace go on hull to reel it in. If ship not at precise angle and speed, we die. Example: We must fly backwards to keep proper velocity, even though Grace still have no pilot experience!
:'''Ryland Grace''': Hey, I've been practicing, haven't I?

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': They seem to be... dimming the sun a tiny, teeny-weeny little bit.
:'''Olivia''': So no big whoop?
:'''Ryland Grace''': It's a-It's a small whoop. It's small-to-medium whoop. Over the next 30 years, the Earth could cool maybe 10 to... 15 degrees.
:'''Olivia''': So it is a big whoop?

----
:'''Ryland Grace''': Did you get your free hat?
:'''Eva Stratt''': Yeah I k-I kind of bought them?

==Taglines==
* Believe in the Hail Mary

==Cast==
* [[w:Ryan Gosling|Ryland Grace]] - Ryland Grace
* [[w:Sandra Hüller|Sandra Hüller]] - Eva Stratt
* [[w:James Ortiz|James Ortiz]] - Rocky
* [[w:Lionel Boyce|Lionel Boyce]] - Carl
* [[w:Milana Vayntrub|Milana Vayntrub]] - Olesya Ilyukhina
* [[w:Ken Leung|Ken Leung]] - Yao
* [[w:Priya Kansara|Priya Kansara]] - Mary(voice)
* [[w:Mia Soteriou|Mia Soteriou]] - Dr. Browne
* Annelle Olaleye - Olivia
* Maya Eva Hosein - Rekha
* Bastian Antonio Fuentes - Parker

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commonscat}}
* {{IMDb title|id=12042730|title=Project Hail Mary}}
* {{rotten-tomatoes|id=project_hail_mary|title=Galaxy Quest}}

[[Category:2026 films]]
[[Category:2020s American films]]
[[Category:Space adventure films]]
[[Category:Action science fiction films]]
[[Category:Films about extraterrestrial life]]</text>
      <sha1>dpeu5o7bq7edrduhxjhyl6xig29oykz</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Spider-Noir</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>307834</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964989</id>
      <parentid>3961317</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:10:48Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Iago PUC</username>
        <id>2458636</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964989</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4722" sha1="4fssmt1qf8v7abyfzaxeibc86vmumpe" xml:space="preserve">{{Italic title}}
[[File:2023_NYCC_Cosplay_of_Spider-Man_Noir_%28cropped%29.jpg|thumb|right|Someone once asked me what universe this was. A strange question that stuck with me all these years later. All I could say for sure was it was the only one I knew of. And that was as true then as it is now. Am I an extraordinary man? Yes. Am I an ordinary man? Yes. I'm both. I'm neither. But aren't we all?{{center|—''Ben Reilly''}}]]
'''''[[w:Spider-Noir|Spider-Noir]]''''' is an American [[w:Superhero fiction|superhero]] [[w:Noir fiction|noir]] series developed by [[w:Oren Uziel|Oren Uziel]] for [[w:MGM+|MGM+]] and [[w:Amazon Prime Video|Prime Video]]. Based on [[Marvel Comics]] featuring the character [[w:Spider-Man Noir|Spider-Man Noir]], the series follows an aging private investigator and superhero (portrayed by [[Nicolas Cage]]) in 1930s New York City who grapples with his past.

==Episodes==
===''Step Into My Office''===
:'''Ben Reilly''': ''(narrating)'' Someone once asked me what universe this was. A strange question that stuck with me all these years later. All I could say for sure was it was the only one I knew of. And that was as true then as it is now. Am I an extraordinary man? Yes. Am I an ordinary man? Yes. I'm both. I'm neither. But aren't we all? New York. I grew up in this city. I learned to fight in this city. And I fell in love in this city. A mistake I'll never make again. I used to be The Spider, this city's hero. Always on guard, always ready to swoop in and save the day. That ended when Ruby died. We were going to be married in the spring. I even bought a ring to make it official. A ring I never had the chance to give her. Ruby once told me that with great power comes great responsibility. Well, she was the greatest responsibility I ever had. And I failed her. The Spider failed her. After that, I didn't want the power or the responsibility. So I went back to being just an ordinary man. That was five years ago.

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Frankie''': You know, I've been practicing my pocket tricks.
:'''Ben Reilly''': Oh, yeah? How's that going?
:'''Frankie''': You tell me. ''[takes a photo from Ben's pocket; wolf whistles]'' Dames, huh?
:'''Ben Reilly''': What would you know?
:'''Frankie''': Lots. I'm wise behind these ears.
:'''Ben Reilly''': Smarts like that, maybe thinking about going to school.
:'''Frankie''': Who needs it? A plus B equals C.
:'''Ben Reilly''': You don't do math with letters, kid.

===''Tread Lightly''===
:'''Robbie Roberston''': So, that's it?
:'''Vera Addison''': What do you mean?
:'''Robbie Robertson''': No tears? I just told you your husband died.
:'''Vera Addison''': People grieve in different ways.
:'''Robbie Robertson''': You already knew.
:'''Vera Addison''':  James was a lot of things, but not the type to cut and run.

===''Double Cross''===
:'''Ben Reilly''': Crafty bastard marks all of his bills.

===''A Mistake I'll Never Make Again''===
:'''Cat Hardy''': ''(to Ben)'' Nice to meet you, Mr. Spider.

===''Betrayal''===
:'''Ben Reilly''': Uh, are you going to share it?
:'''Robbie Robertson''': Are you gonna be a dick about it?
:'''Ben Reilly''': Uh, yes, actually, a private dick , to be exact.

===''Nightmare on a Gurney''===
:'''Ben Reilly''': Spider was never a hero. I only did it for the thrill..
:'''Ogden''': Well... maybe you weren't then. But there is still time for you to become one.

===''Nobody's Hero''===
:'''Ben Reilly''': Maybe... Maybe, maybe, maybe the Spider is a guy like anyone else. You ever think about that? You ever wonder what his problems were? He's swinging around burning buildings saving people, you ever think he feels the heat? Or he gets ''SAD?'' OR '''TIRED?!''' '''''OR LONELY?!'''''

&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''The Spider''': This doesn't have to be a fight.
:'''Lonnie Lincoln''': Well, it's gonna be.
:'''The Spider''': Okay, not the response I was looking for.

===''The Man in the Mask''===
:'''Ben Reilly''': I'm not in the mood to talk to The Spider. The truth is, he's kind of hard to talk to, especially on the phone. Hey, buddy, can you remove the mask so a guy can actually hear?
:'''Silvermane''': Is this some kind of joke? A piece of humor I'm not grasping?
:'''Ben Reilly''': No, I mean it. I genuinely can't understand half of what comes out of his mouth. Well, you've seen him. He wears a stupid sock on his head.
&lt;hr width=&quot;50%&quot;/&gt;
:'''Silvermane''': Never be satisfied. Don't accept what you're given. Because nobody's going to give you what you want. They're going to give you what they want to give you for their own reasons.

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Spider-Man}}
[[Category:Television shows]]
[[Category:Amazon Prime Video shows]]
[[Category:Spider-Man TV shows]]</text>
      <sha1>4fssmt1qf8v7abyfzaxeibc86vmumpe</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Supergirl (2026 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>308781</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965167</id>
      <parentid>3957905</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:19:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ex Archer</username>
        <id>3285937</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Kara Zor-El / Supergirl */</comment>
      <origin>3965167</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2539" sha1="87mwsrpnbps012ste3bvvttl8guv830" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Supergirl (2026 film)|Supergirl]]''''' is a 2026 American superhero film about Supergirl, who travels across the galaxy on a murderous quest for revenge. It is the second installment in the [[w:DC Universe (franchise)|DC Universe]].
:''Directed by {{w|Craig Gillespie}}, written by {{w|Ana Nogueira}}, based on the DC Comics character of [[Supergirl]].''
{{center|'''Truth. Justice. Whatever.'''{{small|([[#Taglines|taglines]])}}}}

{{film-stub}}
== [[w:Supergirl|Kara Zor-El / Supergirl]] ==
* I, Kara Zor-El, of inebriated mind, hereby declare that 23 will be the best year yet... let's be honest, babe. It's not a very high bar to clear.
* You managed to get most of it on the paper this time. Good job, buddy.
* Okay, this does not look like this is gonna end well...for you guys.
* We haven't been formally introduced.
* My cousin and I have very different ideas about what it means to be a hero. He sees the good in everyone, and I see the truth.
* Revenge, it won't take your pain away.
* Krypton didn't die in a day. The gods are not that kind.

== Krem of the Yellow Hills ==
* Your eyes are beautiful when you cry. A lot of pain. Lot of suffering.

== [[w:Lobo (character)|Lobo]] ==
* Stop. You're hurting my head.
* Aren't you that ditz from that dive bar? ''['''Supergirl''': That's funny. That's what I've been calling you.]'' Touché.

== Others ==

== Dialogue == 

== Taglines ==
* Look out.
* Turth. Justice. Whatever.
* Watch out universe.

== Cast ==
* [[w:Milly Alcock|Milly Alcock]] – [[w:Supergirl|Kara Zor-El / Supergirl]]
* [[w:Matthias Schoenaerts|Matthias Schoenaerts]] – Krem of the Yellow Hills
* [[w:Eve Ridley|Eve Ridley]] – Ruthye Marye Knoll
* [[w:David Krumholtz|David Krumholtz]] – [[w:Zor-El|Zor-El]]
* [[w:Emily Beecham|Emily Beecham]] – [[w:Alura (DC Comics)|Alura In-Ze]]
* [[w:David Corenswet|David Corenswet]] — [[Superman|Kal-El / Clark Kent / Superman]]
* [[Jason Momoa]] — [[w:Lobo (character)|Lobo]]

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{commonscat}}
*{{Official website|https://www.supergirlmovie.com}}
*{{IMDb title|8814476|Supergirl}}
*{{rotten-tomatoes|supergirl_2026|Supergirl}}

{{DC Comics live-action films}}


[[Category:2026 films]]
[[Category:2020s American films]]
[[Category:Action films]]
[[Category:Comic book films]]
[[Category:Science fiction films]]
[[Category:Drama films]]
[[Category:DC Universe (franchise)]]
[[Category:Reboot films]]
[[Category:Superman films]]
[[Category:Films about dogs]]
[[Category:Films set on fictional planets]]</text>
      <sha1>87mwsrpnbps012ste3bvvttl8guv830</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Thomas &amp; Friends: Blue Mountain Mystery</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>308782</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965107</id>
      <parentid>3957810</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:35:17Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3965107</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="763" sha1="7ikgjclsd4uhn1jdlmwopptz8n3ik1z" xml:space="preserve">'''Blue Mountain Mystery''' is the seventh feature-length Thomas &amp; Friends special released in 2012.

==Thomas==
Why does Luke have to hide away like that? Why is he so scared of being found? What could he have done that could be bad enough to be sent away from Sodor?

==Dialogues==
==Voice cast==
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{Thomas &amp; Friends}}

[[Category:2012 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Greg Tiernan]]
[[Category:British computer-animated films]]
[[Category:Children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy films]]
[[Category:Thomas &amp; Friends films]]
[[Category:Films based on animated television series]]
[[Category:Films based on children's books]]</text>
      <sha1>7ikgjclsd4uhn1jdlmwopptz8n3ik1z</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Grand Canyonscope</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>308843</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964931</id>
      <parentid>3961537</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:05:14Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External links */</comment>
      <origin>3964931</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3313" sha1="9kllgjk4935h2dfys7563y5ya6qqzmj" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Grand.Canyonscope.title.png|thumb|Title card]]
{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Grand Canyonscope|Grand Canyonscope]]''''' is a [[w:Donald Duck|Donald Duck]] animated short released in 1954. It was Disney's second cartoon filmed in [[w:CinemaScope|CinemaScope]] (following '''''[[Toot, Whistle, Plunk and Boom]]'''''), and was produced to accompany Disney's first CinemaScope film, '''''[[20,000 Leagues Under the Sea (1954 film)|20,000 Leagues Under the Sea]]'''''. One joke has J. Audubon Woodlore breaking the fourth wall stating to the tourists in the CinemaScope version, &quot;Uh, spread out, folks, this is CinemaScope&quot; or in the non-CinemaScope version, &quot;Uh, spread out, folks, this is a big canyon.&quot; This short was the first Donald Duck cartoon to be distributed by Disney's own distribution company, [[w:Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures|Buena Vista Distribution]], instead of [[w:Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures|RKO Radio Pictures]]. The short film was directed by [[w:Charles August Nichols|C. August Nichols]].

==Ranger Woodlore==
* Uh, spread out, folks, this is CinemaScope.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
* I should have stayed in the postal service.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
* ''[last lines]'' Well, I hope your satisfied. You two have, in a matter of minutes, messed up what it took Mother Nature millions of years to create. The National Park Rule Book states, and I quote, &quot;When a natural object is marred or defaced, it must be restored to its original state.&quot; So, START DIGGING!

==Dialogue==
:'''Ranger Woodlore:''' ''[describing the Grand Canyon]'' And mind you, at this point, it's a mile deep.
:'''Donald Duck:''' ''[looking down into the canyon; voice echoing]'' A mile deep?
:''[Donald takes a rock and drops it toward the bottom, but Ranger Woodlore catches on quickly and catches the rock with a net]''
:'''Ranger Woodlore:''' ''[to Donald]'' Ah-ah-ah, no throwing of rocks into the canyon. If we all threw rocks into the canyon, pretty soon, we wouldn't have a canyon, would we?

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Donald Duck:''' ''[Looking for his burro, he sees a tail sticking out of a cave]'' Ah, she's hiding.
:'''Ranger Woodlore:''' Now, now, let me handle this. ''[Pulls on tail; out comes an old mountain lion]'' All right, come on, now. Straighten up there. Most unbecoming a burro. Why, you're getting to look a little shaggy, like an old lion. A lion? That's impossible. ''[Looks through a guide book]'' The last lion seen in the canyon was during the Civil War. So that couldn't be you. Or could it? ''[Lion puts on a Confederate cap; Ranger whistles Dixie and salutes; the lion roars and Ranger runs]'' It's a lion!
:'''Donald Duck:''' Where? ''[Takes a picture as lion nearly eats him]'' Wow!

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|0047043}}

{{Mickey Mouse &amp; Friends}}

[[Category:Donald Duck films]]
[[Category:1954 animated films]]
[[Category:1954 American animated films]]
[[Category:1950s American animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated comedy short films]]
[[Category:Children's animated fantasy short films]]
[[Category:The Walt Disney Company]]
[[Category:Films directed by Charles August Nichols]]
[[Category:Walt Disney films]]</text>
      <sha1>9kllgjk4935h2dfys7563y5ya6qqzmj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Charles August Nichols</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>308845</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964933</id>
      <parentid>3958030</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:05:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3964933</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="97" sha1="04aiqhlm0dpumkg2s8x8jweu0utdk9q" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|August Nicholas, Charles]]
[[Category:Charles August Nichols films]]</text>
      <sha1>04aiqhlm0dpumkg2s8x8jweu0utdk9q</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964934</id>
      <parentid>3964933</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:05:44Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3964934</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="55" sha1="slygm3f681s6jy16c3f96m5qetqa6u6" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|August Nicholas, Charles]]</text>
      <sha1>slygm3f681s6jy16c3f96m5qetqa6u6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Minions &amp; Monsters</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>308966</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965123</id>
      <parentid>3964016</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:08:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-36811-84</username>
        <id>3345436</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Cast */</comment>
      <origin>3965123</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3207" sha1="efixzat4xwrxb8bh521mler2qsswmfh" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''{{w|Minions &amp; Monsters}}''''' is a 2026 American 3D computer-animated comedy film and a prequel to ''[[Minions (film)|Minions]]'' (2015) in which the Minions aim to make a monster movie of their very own in Old Hollywood.

:''Directed by {{w|Pierre Coffin}}. Written by Brian Lynch and Pierre Coffin.''

{{film-stub}}

== Goomi ==
* I'm free! Yes, I'm free! Freedom! I've been trapped in that book forever. And I'm... ''[Henry touches his head]'' ... I'm forever in your debt. And I just wanna... ''[Henry keeps squishing]'' How'd you do there, mister?
* Stop manhandling me, you big weirdo!
* I'm Gary Orkam Oliver Magma Ichabod the Deceiver, but my friends just call me Goomi for short.
* I know the perfect monsters for your movie!
* Don't be scared though, they're such good guys. Just try not to look too delicious.
* Behold, the all-powerful Irene! She's going to destroy everything on the planet!

== Max ==
* You see those large, heavily armed men? They suspect you have killed their leader and they want you dead.
* James, you're going to do great things.

== Dialogue ==
:''[Debbie, as Mary, walks onto the detective's office set. As the cameras roll, she glances at her line on a cue card]''
:'''Debbie''': You disappear from my life 5 years ago, and now you think you can come waltzing back in? Well, no! No, I say! ''[She grabs a glass and throws the contents in Henry's face]'' Get lost, you handsome bastard! ''[She strides away, and on cue, Henry grabs and dips her]'' Oh, Humphrey. My mother warned me about men like you. ''[Henry pauses to glance at his cue card and sees Max gesturing encouragingly]''
:'''Henry''': ''[clearing his throat]'' Bobby. Piñata. Carbonara. Lasagna. ''[He makes smooching noises]''
:'''Debbie''': What?
:'''Max''': What?
----
:'''James''': So James.
:'''Goomi''': Ah, James. Rolls off the face tendrils. &quot;James&quot;.
:'''James''': Isatera Henry.
:'''Henry''': Eh, Bello.
:'''Goomi''': Henry! Oh, I like it! It sounds tough and rugged. It's like, &quot;Oh, look out! Here comes Henry!&quot;.
:'''James''': Ela Ed.
:'''Goomi''': Ed! ''Enchanté''.
:''[Ed greets Goomi in sign language]''

==Cast==
* {{w|Pierre Coffin}} — The Minions
* {{w|Trey Parker}} — Gary Orkam Oliver Magma Ichabod &quot;Goomi&quot; the Deceiver
* {{w|Allison Janney}} — Olivia
* {{w|Christoph Waltz}} — Max
* {{w|Jesse Eisenberg}} — [[w:Gort (The Day the Earth Stood Still)|Gort]]
* {{w|Jeff Bridges}} — Frank and Elwood Blight
* [[Zoey Deutch]] — Debbie
* {{w|Bobby Moynihan}} — Phillip
* [[Phil LaMarr]] — Howard
* [[George Lucas]] — Himself

==External Links==
{{wikipedia}}
*{{IMDb title|5113044|Minions &amp; Monsters}}

{{Despicable Me}}

[[Category:2026 American animated films]]
[[Category:2026 computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American computer-animated films]]
[[Category:American children's animated adventure films]]
[[Category:American children's animated comedy films]]
[[Category:American 3D animated films]]
[[Category:Despicable Me]]
[[Category:Prequel films]]
[[Category:Film spin-offs]]
[[Category:Films about monsters]]
[[Category:Films about film directors and producers]]
[[Category:Films set in the 1920s]]
[[Category:2026 English-language films]]</text>
      <sha1>efixzat4xwrxb8bh521mler2qsswmfh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>O. C. Ukeje</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309143</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965028</id>
      <parentid>3963025</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:41:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965028</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2173" sha1="gj7ih8cwzh7rl6gd2ccpqh3ms0tkica" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:OC Ukeje|Okechukwu Ukeje]]''', known as '''OC Ukeje'''is a Nigerian actor, model and musician. He came into prominence after winning the Amstel Malta Box Office (AMBO) reality show. He has received several awards including Africa Movie Academy Awards, Africa Magic Viewers Choice Awards, Nollywood Movies Awards, Best of Nollywood Awards, Nigeria Entertainment Awards and Golden Icons Academy Movie Awards. He has featured in several award-winning films including Two Brides and a Baby, Hoodrush, Alan Poza, Confusion Na Wa and Half of a Yellow Sun.

==Quotes==
*I did not stop picking the right kind of scripts, I did not stop going to circles that I thought are the important ones
**[https://ynaija.com/theynaijainterview-i-cannot-play-same-sex-roles-for-money-or-awards-consideration-actor-oc-ukeje/]

*For me it feels better that way so that it does not feel like it is a band wagon effect where we are all rewarding one performance
**[https://ynaija.com/theynaijainterview-i-cannot-play-same-sex-roles-for-money-or-awards-consideration-actor-oc-ukeje/]

*I wish I could say I had an extra source of income but I didn’t. matter of fact, things got even worse after winning the reality show because I invested a huge chunk of the money in hedge funds and I lost the investment due to the government clamp down.
**[https://ynaija.com/theynaijainterview-i-cannot-play-same-sex-roles-for-money-or-awards-consideration-actor-oc-ukeje/]

*Everyone who goes into this business has to be sure of the reason they are doing it in the first place. It is important to make money but I don’t think that money is everything.
**[https://www.thecable.ng/oc-ukeje-nollywood-livelihood/]

*It would be silly of me to depend on films alone as my only source of livelihood especially because I know that the industry is not in a place where one or two pay days can cover you for a year. That happens abroad but not here
**[https://www.thecable.ng/oc-ukeje-nollywood-livelihood/]

==External Links==
{{wikipedia}}
*{{IMDb name|3149922}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ukeje, O. C.}}
[[Category:Nigerian musicians]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1981 births]]
[[Category:Nigerian actors]]</text>
      <sha1>gj7ih8cwzh7rl6gd2ccpqh3ms0tkica</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Uzoamaka Onuoha</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309145</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965040</id>
      <parentid>3963043</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:55:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965040</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1502" sha1="s5ady1c1vhh4hxoa9z8rv0azyekcu7k" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Uzoamaka Onuoha portrait 2024png.jpeg|thumb]]
'''[[w:Uzoamaka Onuoha|Uzoamaka Cynthia Ginikachukwu Onuoha]]''' is a Nigerian actress known for her work in film, television, and stage productions. She gained national recognition with her lead role in Diiche, Showmax's first Nigerian original limited series, which received seven nominations at the Africa Magic Viewers' Choice Awards (AMVCA) in 2023.

==Quotes==
*It feels great. I feel good; I feel seen. I feel the pat on my shoulders for my contribution to the art through my work.
**[https://independent.ng/we-should-tell-african-stories-truthfully-and-tell-them-well-uzoamaka-onuoha/#google_vignette]
* I have had to learn, unlearn, and relearn as a performer during the course of my journey as a creative.
**[https://independent.ng/we-should-tell-african-stories-truthfully-and-tell-them-well-uzoamaka-onuoha/]
*I believe the Nollywood film industry is a major key player when it comes to shaping cultural narratives in Africa and globally.
**[https://independent.ng/we-should-tell-african-stories-truthfully-and-tell-them-well-uzoamaka-onuoha/]
*Winning Best Actress at AFRIFF isn’t just about a trophy - it’s a celebration of hard work, dedication, and a deep love for storytelling.
**[https://www.pulse.ng/story/uzoamaka-onuoha-discusses-her-win-as-best-actress-afriff-2024-2024111911505172775#google_vignette]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb name|nm13823429}}

[[category: living people]]
[[Category:Nigerian actresses]]</text>
      <sha1>s5ady1c1vhh4hxoa9z8rv0azyekcu7k</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>I Go Dye</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309165</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965039</id>
      <parentid>3963041</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:53:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965039</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1503" sha1="falka7xyq4ykjk11zeagp1m3yd1j6qr" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:I Go Dye|Francis Agoda]]''' (born April 4, 1979), better known by his stage name '''I Go Dye''', is a Nigerian comedian, motivational speaker, and social advocate. He is best known for his performances as a stand-up comedian, which he drew from his experiences growing up in Warri, Nigeria. His performances are almost exclusively delivered in Nigerian pidgin. He has organised various international comedy shows, including I Go Dye Standing.

==Quotes==
*Don’t use sentimental empathy on the youths to express your political ambitions.
**[https://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/more-news/251355-dont-lure-nigerian-youth-sentiments-comedian-i-go-dye-tells-atiku.html?tztc=1]
*This is the essence of making sacrifices for the future generation. You cannot be credited to have been a philanthropic to the youths.
**[https://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/more-news/251355-dont-lure-nigerian-youth-sentiments-comedian-i-go-dye-tells-atiku.html?tztc=1]
*I was born on the street and today the love gotten from the street has given me honor. This award is therefore dedicated to the undiscovered talents on the street and it is important not to always give up our dreams
**[https://www.nollywoodgists.com/news/16172/celebrity-quote-i-go-dye.html]
*We cannot allow our dream to kill our reality. 
**[https://encomium.ng/star-comedian-i-go-dye-talks-about-the-joys-of-fatherhood-and-matrimony/]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:I Go, Dye}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1979 births]]</text>
      <sha1>falka7xyq4ykjk11zeagp1m3yd1j6qr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>DJ Neptune</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309176</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965031</id>
      <parentid>3963019</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:44:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965031</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1822" sha1="pao3axuy0a4svwml9jx916qn92vfg6m" xml:space="preserve">== DJ Neptune ==

'''[[w:Imohiesen Patrick|Imohiesen Patrick]]''' (born 26 September 1990), professionally known as DJ Neptune, is a Nigerian DJ and record producer born in Lagos, Nigeria.

==Quotes==
* I am a private person and only allow my work to speak for me. I am not a shy person like people think but I like to mind my business. I just want my reputation to speak for me. I don't think my life contradicts my profession because I have been in the music industry for 19 years and it has never been a problem for me.
** Interview with ''The Punch Newspapers'', &quot;Why I keep my personal life separate from my brand&quot; (2019)
* While working on my debut album, in 2018, I was going to name the project something else. On a particular day, I was taking a nap. It felt like someone was communicating to me that 'you are doing great stuff; you are doing amazing stuff and greatness is all I see.'
** Interview with ''Pulse Nigeria'', &quot;How I got the title for my 'Greatness' album&quot; (2018)
* As a DJ, I work with a lot of music. While mixing songs sometimes, I blend two artistes together to create a refix and it sounds nice. I really don't have any rules to my music. Music is spiritual. I might be in a particular place at a particular time and I try to create something out of that. Whatever collaboration I am trying to achieve, the end result has to be great sounds, quality music.
** Interview with ''The Guardian Nigeria'', &quot;Music is spiritual to me — DJ Neptune&quot; (2020)
* Ike ike, ike oh sarupanla / Ah ih ah ih mama (ih yeyeyeye) Ah ih ah ih ah ih mama (oh oh oh ohhh)
** Lyrics from &quot;Marry&quot; featuring Mr Eazi, from the album ''Greatness'' (2018)

[[Category:1990 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Neptune, DJ}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1990 births]]</text>
      <sha1>pao3axuy0a4svwml9jx916qn92vfg6m</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965032</id>
      <parentid>3965031</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:45:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>added thumbnail</comment>
      <origin>3965032</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1850" sha1="06webiyeo3rie69nc1j9n0zn2dfakgb" xml:space="preserve">[[File:DJ Neptune (cropped).png|thumb]]
'''[[w:Imohiesen Patrick|Imohiesen Patrick]]''' (born 26 September 1990), professionally known as '''DJ Neptune''', is a Nigerian DJ and record producer born in Lagos, Nigeria.

==Quotes==
* I am a private person and only allow my work to speak for me. I am not a shy person like people think but I like to mind my business. I just want my reputation to speak for me. I don't think my life contradicts my profession because I have been in the music industry for 19 years and it has never been a problem for me.
** Interview with ''The Punch Newspapers'', &quot;Why I keep my personal life separate from my brand&quot; (2019)
* While working on my debut album, in 2018, I was going to name the project something else. On a particular day, I was taking a nap. It felt like someone was communicating to me that 'you are doing great stuff; you are doing amazing stuff and greatness is all I see.'
** Interview with ''Pulse Nigeria'', &quot;How I got the title for my 'Greatness' album&quot; (2018)
* As a DJ, I work with a lot of music. While mixing songs sometimes, I blend two artistes together to create a refix and it sounds nice. I really don't have any rules to my music. Music is spiritual. I might be in a particular place at a particular time and I try to create something out of that. Whatever collaboration I am trying to achieve, the end result has to be great sounds, quality music.
** Interview with ''The Guardian Nigeria'', &quot;Music is spiritual to me — DJ Neptune&quot; (2020)
* Ike ike, ike oh sarupanla / Ah ih ah ih mama (ih yeyeyeye) Ah ih ah ih ah ih mama (oh oh oh ohhh)
** Lyrics from &quot;Marry&quot; featuring Mr Eazi, from the album ''Greatness'' (2018)

[[Category:1990 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Neptune, DJ}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1990 births]]</text>
      <sha1>06webiyeo3rie69nc1j9n0zn2dfakgb</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Tekno Miles</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309183</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965033</id>
      <parentid>3963021</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:48:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965033</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1915" sha1="jh4b0116mu30jvmcs1zjxaqkxuexnly" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Tekno (musician)|Augustine Miles Kelechi Okechukwu]]''' (born 17 December 1992), professionally known as '''Tekno Miles''' or just '''Tekno''', is a Nigerian singer, songwriter and record producer.His song &quot;Enjoy&quot; was the closing song in the seventh episode in season three of the Emmy-winning TV series Ted Lasso (2020).

==Quotes==
*Say love is a beautiful thing
:Girl you dey cool my temper
:Love is a wonderful tender feeling
:You dey give me ginger
:Eh, 'say baby dancey-dancey, dance
:All the beauty in your eyes dey give me life.
:*[https://genius.com/Tekno-pana-lyrics]

*When I’m looking for a producer, I need someone who gets my vision and can bring their own flavor to the table. Egar Boi and Louddaaa are crazy talented. They understand the vibe I’m going for and help take it to the next level. It’s all about that chemistry and being able to create magic together.
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]

*Staying authentic is key. My music always reflects where I come from and my experiences. At the same time, I’m open to new influences and trends that can connect with a global audience. It’s about finding that balance, keeping the Afrobeat heart while adding elements that appeal to a wider audience. Authenticity resonates, and that’s what I aim to deliver.
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]

*Engaging with my audience is all about being genuine and staying connected. 
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]
*What I feel in my heart is true
:What you see in my eyes bu eziokwu
:Jejeli, baby, I have fallen for you
:In the head, to my heart and body .. heart and body.
:*[https://genius.com/Tekno-diana-lyrics]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Tekno}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1992 births]]
[[Category:Nigerian musicians]]</text>
      <sha1>jh4b0116mu30jvmcs1zjxaqkxuexnly</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965034</id>
      <parentid>3965033</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:49:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>GrimRob moved page [[Tekno]] to [[Tekno Miles]]: matches WP name</comment>
      <origin>3965033</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1915" sha1="jh4b0116mu30jvmcs1zjxaqkxuexnly" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Tekno (musician)|Augustine Miles Kelechi Okechukwu]]''' (born 17 December 1992), professionally known as '''Tekno Miles''' or just '''Tekno''', is a Nigerian singer, songwriter and record producer.His song &quot;Enjoy&quot; was the closing song in the seventh episode in season three of the Emmy-winning TV series Ted Lasso (2020).

==Quotes==
*Say love is a beautiful thing
:Girl you dey cool my temper
:Love is a wonderful tender feeling
:You dey give me ginger
:Eh, 'say baby dancey-dancey, dance
:All the beauty in your eyes dey give me life.
:*[https://genius.com/Tekno-pana-lyrics]

*When I’m looking for a producer, I need someone who gets my vision and can bring their own flavor to the table. Egar Boi and Louddaaa are crazy talented. They understand the vibe I’m going for and help take it to the next level. It’s all about that chemistry and being able to create magic together.
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]

*Staying authentic is key. My music always reflects where I come from and my experiences. At the same time, I’m open to new influences and trends that can connect with a global audience. It’s about finding that balance, keeping the Afrobeat heart while adding elements that appeal to a wider audience. Authenticity resonates, and that’s what I aim to deliver.
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]

*Engaging with my audience is all about being genuine and staying connected. 
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]
*What I feel in my heart is true
:What you see in my eyes bu eziokwu
:Jejeli, baby, I have fallen for you
:In the head, to my heart and body .. heart and body.
:*[https://genius.com/Tekno-diana-lyrics]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Tekno}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1992 births]]
[[Category:Nigerian musicians]]</text>
      <sha1>jh4b0116mu30jvmcs1zjxaqkxuexnly</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965037</id>
      <parentid>3965034</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:50:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>added thumbnail</comment>
      <origin>3965037</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1963" sha1="cppu58sgl807016fvyxwf7hgs0t9cl2" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Tekno.jpg|thumb]]
'''[[w:Tekno (musician)|Augustine Miles Kelechi Okechukwu]]''' (born 17 December 1992), professionally known as '''Tekno Miles''' or just '''Tekno''', is a Nigerian singer, songwriter and record producer.His song &quot;Enjoy&quot; was the closing song in the seventh episode in season three of the Emmy-winning TV series Ted Lasso (2020).

==Quotes==
*Say love is a beautiful thing
:Girl you dey cool my temper
:Love is a wonderful tender feeling
:You dey give me ginger
:Eh, 'say baby dancey-dancey, dance
:All the beauty in your eyes dey give me life.
:*[https://genius.com/Tekno-pana-lyrics]

*When I’m looking for a producer, I need someone who gets my vision and can bring their own flavor to the table. Egar Boi and Louddaaa are crazy talented. They understand the vibe I’m going for and help take it to the next level. It’s all about that chemistry and being able to create magic together.
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]

*Staying authentic is key. My music always reflects where I come from and my experiences. At the same time, I’m open to new influences and trends that can connect with a global audience. It’s about finding that balance, keeping the Afrobeat heart while adding elements that appeal to a wider audience. Authenticity resonates, and that’s what I aim to deliver.
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]

*Engaging with my audience is all about being genuine and staying connected. 
**[https://www.numeronetherlands.com/motion-sound/in-conversation-with-tekno]
*What I feel in my heart is true
:What you see in my eyes bu eziokwu
:Jejeli, baby, I have fallen for you
:In the head, to my heart and body .. heart and body.
:*[https://genius.com/Tekno-diana-lyrics]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Tekno}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1992 births]]
[[Category:Nigerian musicians]]</text>
      <sha1>cppu58sgl807016fvyxwf7hgs0t9cl2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>User:SonalDahanayaka</title>
    <ns>2</ns>
    <id>309252</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964885</id>
      <parentid>3960456</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:15:22Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>MathXplore</username>
        <id>3050778</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Requesting deletion ([[:m:Special:MyLanguage/User:TenWhile6/XReport|XReport]] v3.1c)</comment>
      <origin>3964885</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="150" sha1="s0m8fo3idz286hkmm7b4lnkpxefr23q" xml:space="preserve">&lt;noinclude&gt;{{delete|1=Broken redirect &lt;small&gt;[[:m:Special:MyLanguage/User:TenWhile6/XReport|XReport]]&lt;/small&gt;}}&lt;/noinclude&gt;
#REDIRECT [[User:Velorak]]</text>
      <sha1>s0m8fo3idz286hkmm7b4lnkpxefr23q</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Fifty Shades of Black</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309383</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964845</id>
      <parentid>3962125</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:32:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3964845</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="564" sha1="ilhu8wurdthxm8aete3oc2k1k6x54gg" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
{{db|No quotes}}
'''''[[w:Fifty Shades of Black|Fifty Shades of Black]]''''' is a 2016 American slapstick romantic comedy film directed by Michael Tiddes and starring Marlon Wayans, who also serves as a co-writer and co-producer. The film is a parody to the 2015 film ''[[Fifty Shades of Grey]]''.
{{film-stub}}

==External Links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:2016 films]]
[[Category:American romance films]]
[[Category:American comedy films]]
[[Category:Romantic comedy films]]
[[Category:Spoof films]]
[[Category:Films directed by Michael Tiddes]]</text>
      <sha1>ilhu8wurdthxm8aete3oc2k1k6x54gg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Moana (2026 film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309484</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965122</id>
      <parentid>3963448</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:06:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-36811-84</username>
        <id>3345436</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Cast */</comment>
      <origin>3965122</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1931" sha1="4a10cw9r8vig50119mre0918vkm8was" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
{{film-stub}}
'''''[[w:Moana (2026 film)|Moana]]''''' is a 2026 American [[w:musical film|musical]] [[w:Adventure film|adventure]] film, telling the story of Moana, the strong-willed daughter of the chief of a [[w:Polynesian|Polynesian]] tribe, who is chosen by the ocean itself to reunite a mystical relic with a goddess. When a blight strikes her island, Moana sets sail in search of Maui, a legendary [[w:demigod|demigod]], in hopes to save her people.
:''Directed by {{w|Thomas Kail}}. Written by {{w|Jared Bush}} and Dana Ledoux Miller, remade from [[Moana (2016 film)|Disney's 2016 animated feature film of the same name]].''

== Moana ==
* I am Moana of Motunui. You will board my boat, sail across the sea, and restore the heart of Te Fiti.
* The ocean chose us for a reason.

== Maui ==
* You're welcome!
* Are you ready to be the hero?

== Dialogue ==

==Cast==
* {{w|Catherine Laga'aia}} — [[w:Moana (character)|Moana]]
** Amaya Masoli appears (8 years old)
***Emma Puahi-Shapazian (4 years old)

* [[Dwayne Johnson]] — [[w:Maui (Moana)|Maui]]

* {{w|John Tui}} — Chief Tui

* {{w|Frankie Adams}} — Sina

* {{w|Rena Owen}} — Gramma Tala

* {{w|Jemaine Clement}} — Voice of Tamatoa

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|27419466|Moana}}

[[Category:2026 films]]
[[Category:2026 American films]]
[[Category:2020s American films]]
[[Category:American 3D films]]
[[Category:American remake films]]
[[Category:American children's adventure films]]
[[Category:Musical films]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:Moana (franchise)]]
[[Category:Seafaring films]]
[[Category:Films about pigs]]
[[Category:Films about chickens]]
[[Category:Films about revenge]]
[[Category:Films set in Oceania]]
[[Category:Works about women]]
[[Category:Films about princesses]]
[[Category:Films about shapeshifting]]
[[Category:Films set on oceans]]
[[Category:The Walt Disney Company]]</text>
      <sha1>4a10cw9r8vig50119mre0918vkm8was</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Viola Nuwaha</title>
    <ns>4</ns>
    <id>309485</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964965</id>
      <parentid>3963855</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:26:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ternera</username>
        <id>2543638</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Viola Nuwaha */ d</comment>
      <origin>3964965</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="526" sha1="48n2g1ziel5sovnkvl3uzyhvzhchr1t" xml:space="preserve">== [[:Viola Nuwaha]] ==
Not notable — [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:48, 10 July 2026 (UTC)
: '''Delete''' as nominator [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 21:48, 10 July 2026 (UTC)
: '''Delete''' per nom. [[User:Markjoseph125|Markjoseph125]] ([[User talk:Markjoseph125|talk]]) 14:07, 12 July 2026 (UTC)
:'''Delete''', not a notable person. [[User:Ternera|Ternera]] ([[User talk:Ternera|talk]]) 14:26, 14 July 2026 (UTC)
&lt;small&gt;'''Vote closes''': 22:00, 17 July 2026 (UTC)&lt;/small&gt;</text>
      <sha1>48n2g1ziel5sovnkvl3uzyhvzhchr1t</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ann Widdecombe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309507</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965256</id>
      <parentid>3963430</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:48:35Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */  abortion/trans quotes</comment>
      <origin>3965256</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5689" sha1="m7fy9ksgzsghik04t4pifxjv4pbm5fn" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Official portrait of Ann Widdecombe as an MEP.jpg|thumb|We get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy]]
'''[[w:Ann Widdecombe|Ann Noreen Widdecombe]]''' (4 October 1947 – {{circa|8 July 2026}}) was a British politician and television personality. As a member of the [[Conservative Party (UK)|Conservative Party]], she was [[w:Member of Parliament (United Kingdom)|Member of Parliament]] (MP) for {{w|Maidstone and The Weald}} and the former [[w:Maidstone (UK Parliament constituency)|Maidstone]] constituency from 1987 to 2010. She was a member of the {{w|Brexit Party}} from 2019 and served as the {{w|Member of the European Parliament}} (MEP) for South West England from 2019 to 2020. She joined {{w|Reform UK}} in 2023 and served as the party's Immigration and Justice spokesperson from 2023 until her death in 2026.

Widdecombe was found dead at her home on {{w|Dartmoor}}, Devon, on 9 July 2026, aged 78, when police launched a murder investigation.

{{Political-stub}}
== Quotes ==
* So I may be remembered neither for politics nor for [[w:Strictly Come Dancing|Strictly]], but for something else that I can’t even foresee at the moment. And we get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy. It’s one go. And you make the most of it. And you take opportunities that come along that you like. And you go for it.
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tv/39711345/ann-widdecombe-tv-strictly-big-brother &quot;Ann Widdecombe’s most memorable TV moments – from Strictly ‘human hoover’ dance to Big Brother clash &amp; The Chase blunder Becky Pemberton&quot;] (2010)

* Our consistent experience of laws is they grow legs and they walk and run away. For example, the 1967 Abortion Act; we were told we’d never have abortion on demand, and it was only for very serious cases; five million children have been aborted in this country since the passing of that Act. The 1969 Divorce Act; we were told this wouldn’t cause disrespect to the institution of marriage, it would just relieve misery in the very few cases. Now we have 40% of all marriages ending in divorce. The 1968 Homosexuality Equality Act; we were told this wouldn’t lead to open displays. Now we’ve got gay news on every street corner. The issue isn’t whether you think you should have abortion on demand or easy divorce or gay news on every street corner, the issue is were the consequences foreseen by the people who introduced those laws? I think if you introduce the euthanasia law in this country, however tightly you drew it, however good your intentions might be, in 10 years time no granny would be safe.
** Quoted in [https://www.messengersaintanthony.com/content/god-i-rt-hon-ann-widdecombe-mp &quot;God &amp; I: Rt. Hon. Ann Widdecombe MP&quot;] (March 21, 2003)

* If marriage suddenly is no longer between a man and a woman, and it’s between a man and a man or a woman and a woman, then why not between one man and two women? Why not polygamy?
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/5292630/celebrity-big-brother-fans-blast-ann-widdecombe-gay-marriage/ &quot;Celebrity Big Brother fans blast Ann Widdecombe over her controversial views on gay marriage&quot;], ''The Sun'' (8 Jan 2018)

* We are born either male or female, an arrangement of nature which allows us to reproduce as a species.
** Quoted in [https://www.express.co.uk/comment/columnists/ann-widdecombe/970254/transgender-equal-rights-feminism-ann-widecombe-visa-crash-kim-woodburn &quot;Why do we fall for transgender lunacy, asks ANN WIDDECOMBE&quot;], Express (Jun 6, 2018)

* If I needed any convincing at all that the best thing for Britain was to leave here as soon as possible, it was the way that those elections were conducted yesterday. Because if that is this place’s idea of democracy then that is a serious betrayal of every country that is represented here.{{Br}}There is a pattern that is present throughout history of oppressed people turning against their oppressors: Slaves against their owners. The peasantry against the feudal barons. And that is why Britain is leaving, and it doesn’t matter which language you use: we are going, and we are glad to be going.{{Br}}Nous allons, wir gehen, we’re off.
** Quoted on [[Brexit]] at: [https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/uk/ann-widdecombe-criticised-for-comparing-brexit-to-slaves-rising-against-owners/a/116608217.html &quot;Ann Widdecombe criticised for comparing Brexit to ‘slaves rising against owners’&quot;], ''Belfast Telegraph'' (04 Jul 2019)

== Quotes about Ann Widdecombe ==

* She never let anyone … with any doubt in their minds at all where she stood on all the great issues of the day, and she was formidable too. I mean, I can tell you, the times when I used to get a phone call from Ann, abrupt Ann on the phone, saying she disagreed with what I’d done or what I’d said.{{Br}}She’d come to London and we’d sit down over a coffee and talk things through. But that was the thing about Ann: that all the disagreements she had with us over policy and direction and all the normal debate, that was always kept behind closed doors. In public, she was the most incredibly loyal ally.
** [[Nigel Farage]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2026/jul/10/ann-widdecombe-former-tory-mp-and-reform-uk-member-dies-aged-78 &quot;Ann Widdecombe, former Tory minister and Reform UK member, dies aged 78&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (10 Jul 2026)

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commonscat}}
* [https://www.annwiddecombe.com/ Official website]
* {{IMDb name|nm1101051}}


{{DEFAULTSORT:Widdecombe, Ann}}
[[Category:1947 births]]
[[Category:2026 deaths]]
[[Category:Murdered people]]</text>
      <sha1>m7fy9ksgzsghik04t4pifxjv4pbm5fn</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965257</id>
      <parentid>3965256</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:49:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>destubbed as main topics covered</comment>
      <origin>3965257</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5670" sha1="mvjxczxlqjequ5vrl4ht1h9ti9pnj81" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Official portrait of Ann Widdecombe as an MEP.jpg|thumb|We get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy]]
'''[[w:Ann Widdecombe|Ann Noreen Widdecombe]]''' (4 October 1947 – {{circa|8 July 2026}}) was a British politician and television personality. As a member of the [[Conservative Party (UK)|Conservative Party]], she was [[w:Member of Parliament (United Kingdom)|Member of Parliament]] (MP) for {{w|Maidstone and The Weald}} and the former [[w:Maidstone (UK Parliament constituency)|Maidstone]] constituency from 1987 to 2010. She was a member of the {{w|Brexit Party}} from 2019 and served as the {{w|Member of the European Parliament}} (MEP) for South West England from 2019 to 2020. She joined {{w|Reform UK}} in 2023 and served as the party's Immigration and Justice spokesperson from 2023 until her death in 2026.

Widdecombe was found dead at her home on {{w|Dartmoor}}, Devon, on 9 July 2026, aged 78, when police launched a murder investigation.

== Quotes ==
* So I may be remembered neither for politics nor for [[w:Strictly Come Dancing|Strictly]], but for something else that I can’t even foresee at the moment. And we get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy. It’s one go. And you make the most of it. And you take opportunities that come along that you like. And you go for it.
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tv/39711345/ann-widdecombe-tv-strictly-big-brother &quot;Ann Widdecombe’s most memorable TV moments – from Strictly ‘human hoover’ dance to Big Brother clash &amp; The Chase blunder Becky Pemberton&quot;] (2010)

* Our consistent experience of laws is they grow legs and they walk and run away. For example, the 1967 Abortion Act; we were told we’d never have abortion on demand, and it was only for very serious cases; five million children have been aborted in this country since the passing of that Act. The 1969 Divorce Act; we were told this wouldn’t cause disrespect to the institution of marriage, it would just relieve misery in the very few cases. Now we have 40% of all marriages ending in divorce. The 1968 Homosexuality Equality Act; we were told this wouldn’t lead to open displays. Now we’ve got gay news on every street corner. The issue isn’t whether you think you should have abortion on demand or easy divorce or gay news on every street corner, the issue is were the consequences foreseen by the people who introduced those laws? I think if you introduce the euthanasia law in this country, however tightly you drew it, however good your intentions might be, in 10 years time no granny would be safe.
** Quoted in [https://www.messengersaintanthony.com/content/god-i-rt-hon-ann-widdecombe-mp &quot;God &amp; I: Rt. Hon. Ann Widdecombe MP&quot;] (March 21, 2003)

* If marriage suddenly is no longer between a man and a woman, and it’s between a man and a man or a woman and a woman, then why not between one man and two women? Why not polygamy?
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/5292630/celebrity-big-brother-fans-blast-ann-widdecombe-gay-marriage/ &quot;Celebrity Big Brother fans blast Ann Widdecombe over her controversial views on gay marriage&quot;], ''The Sun'' (8 Jan 2018)

* We are born either male or female, an arrangement of nature which allows us to reproduce as a species.
** Quoted in [https://www.express.co.uk/comment/columnists/ann-widdecombe/970254/transgender-equal-rights-feminism-ann-widecombe-visa-crash-kim-woodburn &quot;Why do we fall for transgender lunacy, asks ANN WIDDECOMBE&quot;], Express (Jun 6, 2018)

* If I needed any convincing at all that the best thing for Britain was to leave here as soon as possible, it was the way that those elections were conducted yesterday. Because if that is this place’s idea of democracy then that is a serious betrayal of every country that is represented here.{{Br}}There is a pattern that is present throughout history of oppressed people turning against their oppressors: Slaves against their owners. The peasantry against the feudal barons. And that is why Britain is leaving, and it doesn’t matter which language you use: we are going, and we are glad to be going.{{Br}}Nous allons, wir gehen, we’re off.
** Quoted on [[Brexit]] at: [https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/uk/ann-widdecombe-criticised-for-comparing-brexit-to-slaves-rising-against-owners/a/116608217.html &quot;Ann Widdecombe criticised for comparing Brexit to ‘slaves rising against owners’&quot;], ''Belfast Telegraph'' (04 Jul 2019)

== Quotes about Ann Widdecombe ==

* She never let anyone … with any doubt in their minds at all where she stood on all the great issues of the day, and she was formidable too. I mean, I can tell you, the times when I used to get a phone call from Ann, abrupt Ann on the phone, saying she disagreed with what I’d done or what I’d said.{{Br}}She’d come to London and we’d sit down over a coffee and talk things through. But that was the thing about Ann: that all the disagreements she had with us over policy and direction and all the normal debate, that was always kept behind closed doors. In public, she was the most incredibly loyal ally.
** [[Nigel Farage]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2026/jul/10/ann-widdecombe-former-tory-mp-and-reform-uk-member-dies-aged-78 &quot;Ann Widdecombe, former Tory minister and Reform UK member, dies aged 78&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (10 Jul 2026)

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commonscat}}
* [https://www.annwiddecombe.com/ Official website]
* {{IMDb name|nm1101051}}


{{DEFAULTSORT:Widdecombe, Ann}}
[[Category:1947 births]]
[[Category:2026 deaths]]
[[Category:Murdered people]]</text>
      <sha1>mvjxczxlqjequ5vrl4ht1h9ti9pnj81</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965259</id>
      <parentid>3965257</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:51:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>added [[Category:Pro-life activists]] using [[Help:Gadget-HotCat|HotCat]]</comment>
      <origin>3965259</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5708" sha1="38h2s0j5ncjp346izvw8ozb5pzg3moh" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Official portrait of Ann Widdecombe as an MEP.jpg|thumb|We get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy]]
'''[[w:Ann Widdecombe|Ann Noreen Widdecombe]]''' (4 October 1947 – {{circa|8 July 2026}}) was a British politician and television personality. As a member of the [[Conservative Party (UK)|Conservative Party]], she was [[w:Member of Parliament (United Kingdom)|Member of Parliament]] (MP) for {{w|Maidstone and The Weald}} and the former [[w:Maidstone (UK Parliament constituency)|Maidstone]] constituency from 1987 to 2010. She was a member of the {{w|Brexit Party}} from 2019 and served as the {{w|Member of the European Parliament}} (MEP) for South West England from 2019 to 2020. She joined {{w|Reform UK}} in 2023 and served as the party's Immigration and Justice spokesperson from 2023 until her death in 2026.

Widdecombe was found dead at her home on {{w|Dartmoor}}, Devon, on 9 July 2026, aged 78, when police launched a murder investigation.

== Quotes ==
* So I may be remembered neither for politics nor for [[w:Strictly Come Dancing|Strictly]], but for something else that I can’t even foresee at the moment. And we get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy. It’s one go. And you make the most of it. And you take opportunities that come along that you like. And you go for it.
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tv/39711345/ann-widdecombe-tv-strictly-big-brother &quot;Ann Widdecombe’s most memorable TV moments – from Strictly ‘human hoover’ dance to Big Brother clash &amp; The Chase blunder Becky Pemberton&quot;] (2010)

* Our consistent experience of laws is they grow legs and they walk and run away. For example, the 1967 Abortion Act; we were told we’d never have abortion on demand, and it was only for very serious cases; five million children have been aborted in this country since the passing of that Act. The 1969 Divorce Act; we were told this wouldn’t cause disrespect to the institution of marriage, it would just relieve misery in the very few cases. Now we have 40% of all marriages ending in divorce. The 1968 Homosexuality Equality Act; we were told this wouldn’t lead to open displays. '''Now we’ve got gay news on every street corner.''' The issue isn’t whether you think you should have abortion on demand or easy divorce or gay news on every street corner, the issue is were the consequences foreseen by the people who introduced those laws? I think if you introduce the euthanasia law in this country, however tightly you drew it, however good your intentions might be, in 10 years time no granny would be safe.
** Quoted in [https://www.messengersaintanthony.com/content/god-i-rt-hon-ann-widdecombe-mp &quot;God &amp; I: Rt. Hon. Ann Widdecombe MP&quot;] (March 21, 2003)

* If marriage suddenly is no longer between a man and a woman, and it’s between a man and a man or a woman and a woman, then why not between one man and two women? Why not polygamy?
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/5292630/celebrity-big-brother-fans-blast-ann-widdecombe-gay-marriage/ &quot;Celebrity Big Brother fans blast Ann Widdecombe over her controversial views on gay marriage&quot;], ''The Sun'' (8 Jan 2018)

* We are born either male or female, an arrangement of nature which allows us to reproduce as a species.
** Quoted in [https://www.express.co.uk/comment/columnists/ann-widdecombe/970254/transgender-equal-rights-feminism-ann-widecombe-visa-crash-kim-woodburn &quot;Why do we fall for transgender lunacy, asks ANN WIDDECOMBE&quot;], Express (Jun 6, 2018)

* If I needed any convincing at all that the best thing for Britain was to leave here as soon as possible, it was the way that those elections were conducted yesterday. Because if that is this place’s idea of democracy then that is a serious betrayal of every country that is represented here.{{Br}}There is a pattern that is present throughout history of oppressed people turning against their oppressors: Slaves against their owners. The peasantry against the feudal barons. And that is why Britain is leaving, and it doesn’t matter which language you use: we are going, and we are glad to be going.{{Br}}Nous allons, wir gehen, we’re off.
** Quoted on [[Brexit]] at: [https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/uk/ann-widdecombe-criticised-for-comparing-brexit-to-slaves-rising-against-owners/a/116608217.html &quot;Ann Widdecombe criticised for comparing Brexit to ‘slaves rising against owners’&quot;], ''Belfast Telegraph'' (04 Jul 2019)

== Quotes about Ann Widdecombe ==

* She never let anyone … with any doubt in their minds at all where she stood on all the great issues of the day, and she was formidable too. I mean, I can tell you, the times when I used to get a phone call from Ann, abrupt Ann on the phone, saying she disagreed with what I’d done or what I’d said.{{Br}}She’d come to London and we’d sit down over a coffee and talk things through. But that was the thing about Ann: that all the disagreements she had with us over policy and direction and all the normal debate, that was always kept behind closed doors. In public, she was the most incredibly loyal ally.
** [[Nigel Farage]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2026/jul/10/ann-widdecombe-former-tory-mp-and-reform-uk-member-dies-aged-78 &quot;Ann Widdecombe, former Tory minister and Reform UK member, dies aged 78&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (10 Jul 2026)

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commonscat}}
* [https://www.annwiddecombe.com/ Official website]
* {{IMDb name|nm1101051}}


{{DEFAULTSORT:Widdecombe, Ann}}
[[Category:1947 births]]
[[Category:2026 deaths]]
[[Category:Murdered people]]
[[Category:Pro-life activists]]</text>
      <sha1>38h2s0j5ncjp346izvw8ozb5pzg3moh</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965261</id>
      <parentid>3965259</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:52:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>DOD not circa now</comment>
      <origin>3965261</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5698" sha1="583vouxlxzfdfkjt6j7g7d4obfdx2rt" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Official portrait of Ann Widdecombe as an MEP.jpg|thumb|We get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy]]
'''[[w:Ann Widdecombe|Ann Noreen Widdecombe]]''' (4 October 1947 – 8 July 2026) was a British politician and television personality. As a member of the [[Conservative Party (UK)|Conservative Party]], she was [[w:Member of Parliament (United Kingdom)|Member of Parliament]] (MP) for {{w|Maidstone and The Weald}} and the former [[w:Maidstone (UK Parliament constituency)|Maidstone]] constituency from 1987 to 2010. She was a member of the {{w|Brexit Party}} from 2019 and served as the {{w|Member of the European Parliament}} (MEP) for South West England from 2019 to 2020. She joined {{w|Reform UK}} in 2023 and served as the party's Immigration and Justice spokesperson from 2023 until her death in 2026.

Widdecombe was found dead at her home on {{w|Dartmoor}}, Devon, on 9 July 2026, aged 78, when police launched a murder investigation.

== Quotes ==
* So I may be remembered neither for politics nor for [[w:Strictly Come Dancing|Strictly]], but for something else that I can’t even foresee at the moment. And we get one go this side of eternity, one go. It’s not a dress rehearsal. And that’s my philosophy. It’s one go. And you make the most of it. And you take opportunities that come along that you like. And you go for it.
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tv/39711345/ann-widdecombe-tv-strictly-big-brother &quot;Ann Widdecombe’s most memorable TV moments – from Strictly ‘human hoover’ dance to Big Brother clash &amp; The Chase blunder Becky Pemberton&quot;] (2010)

* Our consistent experience of laws is they grow legs and they walk and run away. For example, the 1967 Abortion Act; we were told we’d never have abortion on demand, and it was only for very serious cases; five million children have been aborted in this country since the passing of that Act. The 1969 Divorce Act; we were told this wouldn’t cause disrespect to the institution of marriage, it would just relieve misery in the very few cases. Now we have 40% of all marriages ending in divorce. The 1968 Homosexuality Equality Act; we were told this wouldn’t lead to open displays. '''Now we’ve got gay news on every street corner.''' The issue isn’t whether you think you should have abortion on demand or easy divorce or gay news on every street corner, the issue is were the consequences foreseen by the people who introduced those laws? I think if you introduce the euthanasia law in this country, however tightly you drew it, however good your intentions might be, in 10 years time no granny would be safe.
** Quoted in [https://www.messengersaintanthony.com/content/god-i-rt-hon-ann-widdecombe-mp &quot;God &amp; I: Rt. Hon. Ann Widdecombe MP&quot;] (March 21, 2003)

* If marriage suddenly is no longer between a man and a woman, and it’s between a man and a man or a woman and a woman, then why not between one man and two women? Why not polygamy?
** [https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/5292630/celebrity-big-brother-fans-blast-ann-widdecombe-gay-marriage/ &quot;Celebrity Big Brother fans blast Ann Widdecombe over her controversial views on gay marriage&quot;], ''The Sun'' (8 Jan 2018)

* We are born either male or female, an arrangement of nature which allows us to reproduce as a species.
** Quoted in [https://www.express.co.uk/comment/columnists/ann-widdecombe/970254/transgender-equal-rights-feminism-ann-widecombe-visa-crash-kim-woodburn &quot;Why do we fall for transgender lunacy, asks ANN WIDDECOMBE&quot;], Express (Jun 6, 2018)

* If I needed any convincing at all that the best thing for Britain was to leave here as soon as possible, it was the way that those elections were conducted yesterday. Because if that is this place’s idea of democracy then that is a serious betrayal of every country that is represented here.{{Br}}There is a pattern that is present throughout history of oppressed people turning against their oppressors: Slaves against their owners. The peasantry against the feudal barons. And that is why Britain is leaving, and it doesn’t matter which language you use: we are going, and we are glad to be going.{{Br}}Nous allons, wir gehen, we’re off.
** Quoted on [[Brexit]] at: [https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/uk/ann-widdecombe-criticised-for-comparing-brexit-to-slaves-rising-against-owners/a/116608217.html &quot;Ann Widdecombe criticised for comparing Brexit to ‘slaves rising against owners’&quot;], ''Belfast Telegraph'' (04 Jul 2019)

== Quotes about Ann Widdecombe ==

* She never let anyone … with any doubt in their minds at all where she stood on all the great issues of the day, and she was formidable too. I mean, I can tell you, the times when I used to get a phone call from Ann, abrupt Ann on the phone, saying she disagreed with what I’d done or what I’d said.{{Br}}She’d come to London and we’d sit down over a coffee and talk things through. But that was the thing about Ann: that all the disagreements she had with us over policy and direction and all the normal debate, that was always kept behind closed doors. In public, she was the most incredibly loyal ally.
** [[Nigel Farage]] quoted in [https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2026/jul/10/ann-widdecombe-former-tory-mp-and-reform-uk-member-dies-aged-78 &quot;Ann Widdecombe, former Tory minister and Reform UK member, dies aged 78&quot;], ''The Guardian'' (10 Jul 2026)

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commonscat}}
* [https://www.annwiddecombe.com/ Official website]
* {{IMDb name|nm1101051}}


{{DEFAULTSORT:Widdecombe, Ann}}
[[Category:1947 births]]
[[Category:2026 deaths]]
[[Category:Murdered people]]
[[Category:Pro-life activists]]</text>
      <sha1>583vouxlxzfdfkjt6j7g7d4obfdx2rt</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ida Wyman</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309512</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964855</id>
      <parentid>3963538</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:39:40Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>partial cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964855</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2968" sha1="loloqywd8t0ly681llfwj8kl38frqhg" xml:space="preserve">{{People-cleanup}}
'''{{w|Ida Dora Wyman}}''' (March 7, 1926 – July 13, 2019) was an American  photographer best known for her [[documentary photography]] of New York street life.&lt;ref name=&quot;nytimes&quot;&gt;{{Cite news|url=https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/19/arts/ida-wyman-dead.html|title=Ida Wyman, Whose Camera Captured Ordinary People, Dies at 93|first=Richard|last=Sandomir|work=The New York Times |date=July 19, 2019|via=NYTimes.com|access-date=July 20, 2019|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190720051649/https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/19/arts/ida-wyman-dead.html|archive-date=July 20, 2019|url-status=live}}&lt;/ref&gt;

==Early life==
Wyman was born in [[Malden, Massachusetts]] on March 7, 1926.&lt;ref name=&quot;nytimes&quot;/&gt;&lt;ref name=&quot;pdnOnline&quot;&gt;{{Cite web|url=https://www.pdnonline.com/features/photography-news/obituaries/obituary-ida-wyman-photographer-for-life-chronicler-of-america-93/|title=Obituary: Ida Wyman, Photographer for Life, Chronicler of America, 93|date=July 18, 2019|website=PDN Online|access-date=July 20, 2019|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190718193523/https://www.pdnonline.com/features/photography-news/obituaries/obituary-ida-wyman-photographer-for-life-chronicler-of-america-93/|archive-date=July 18, 2019|url-status=live}}&lt;/ref&gt; She grew up in [[the Bronx, New York]]. Wyman began her photography career while she was in high school, by taking photos of her neighborhood.&lt;ref&gt;{{Cite web|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=FsdLAQAAIAAJ&amp;q=ida+wyman+bronx|title=This was the Photo League: Compassion and the Camera from the Depression to the Cold War|first=Anne|last=Tucker|date=July 20, 2001|publisher=Stephen Daiter Gallery|via=Google Books}}&lt;/ref&gt; Before becoming a photographer, Wyman had planned to be a nurse.&lt;ref&gt;{{Cite web |url=https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-12-07/the-story-behind-the-clock-set-in-a-new-york-city-sidewalk |title=The Story Behind the Clock Set in a New York City Sidewalk - Bloomberg |website=[[Bloomberg News]] |access-date=2019-07-20 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190720054334/https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-12-07/the-story-behind-the-clock-set-in-a-new-york-city-sidewalk |archive-date=2019-07-20 |url-status=live }}&lt;/ref&gt;

Wyman can be heard as a contestant on the 15th November 1950 edition of [[You Bet Your Life]].

Wyman died in [[Fitchburg, Wisconsin]] on Saturday, July 13, 2019.&lt;ref&gt;{{Cite web|url=http://artdaily.com/news/115340/Monroe-Gallery-of-Photography-announced-the-death-of-photographer-Ida-Wyman|title=Monroe Gallery of Photography announced the death of photographer Ida Wyman|website=artdaily.com|access-date=2019-07-20|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190729135957/http://artdaily.com/news/115340/Monroe-Gallery-of-Photography-announced-the-death-of-photographer-Ida-Wyman|archive-date=2019-07-29|url-status=live}}&lt;/ref&gt;

==References==
{{Reflist}}

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}
[[Category:1926 births]]
[[Category:2019 deaths]]</text>
      <sha1>loloqywd8t0ly681llfwj8kl38frqhg</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964861</id>
      <parentid>3964855</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:53:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Adding VFD with [[User:PieWriter/vfd|tool]]</comment>
      <origin>3964861</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2980" sha1="mq92jw1xtmiu7cugtxaq05ka6uelavb" xml:space="preserve">{{vfd-new}}
{{People-cleanup}}
'''{{w|Ida Dora Wyman}}''' (March 7, 1926 – July 13, 2019) was an American  photographer best known for her [[documentary photography]] of New York street life.&lt;ref name=&quot;nytimes&quot;&gt;{{Cite news|url=https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/19/arts/ida-wyman-dead.html|title=Ida Wyman, Whose Camera Captured Ordinary People, Dies at 93|first=Richard|last=Sandomir|work=The New York Times |date=July 19, 2019|via=NYTimes.com|access-date=July 20, 2019|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190720051649/https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/19/arts/ida-wyman-dead.html|archive-date=July 20, 2019|url-status=live}}&lt;/ref&gt;

==Early life==
Wyman was born in [[Malden, Massachusetts]] on March 7, 1926.&lt;ref name=&quot;nytimes&quot;/&gt;&lt;ref name=&quot;pdnOnline&quot;&gt;{{Cite web|url=https://www.pdnonline.com/features/photography-news/obituaries/obituary-ida-wyman-photographer-for-life-chronicler-of-america-93/|title=Obituary: Ida Wyman, Photographer for Life, Chronicler of America, 93|date=July 18, 2019|website=PDN Online|access-date=July 20, 2019|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190718193523/https://www.pdnonline.com/features/photography-news/obituaries/obituary-ida-wyman-photographer-for-life-chronicler-of-america-93/|archive-date=July 18, 2019|url-status=live}}&lt;/ref&gt; She grew up in [[the Bronx, New York]]. Wyman began her photography career while she was in high school, by taking photos of her neighborhood.&lt;ref&gt;{{Cite web|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=FsdLAQAAIAAJ&amp;q=ida+wyman+bronx|title=This was the Photo League: Compassion and the Camera from the Depression to the Cold War|first=Anne|last=Tucker|date=July 20, 2001|publisher=Stephen Daiter Gallery|via=Google Books}}&lt;/ref&gt; Before becoming a photographer, Wyman had planned to be a nurse.&lt;ref&gt;{{Cite web |url=https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-12-07/the-story-behind-the-clock-set-in-a-new-york-city-sidewalk |title=The Story Behind the Clock Set in a New York City Sidewalk - Bloomberg |website=[[Bloomberg News]] |access-date=2019-07-20 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190720054334/https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-12-07/the-story-behind-the-clock-set-in-a-new-york-city-sidewalk |archive-date=2019-07-20 |url-status=live }}&lt;/ref&gt;

Wyman can be heard as a contestant on the 15th November 1950 edition of [[You Bet Your Life]].

Wyman died in [[Fitchburg, Wisconsin]] on Saturday, July 13, 2019.&lt;ref&gt;{{Cite web|url=http://artdaily.com/news/115340/Monroe-Gallery-of-Photography-announced-the-death-of-photographer-Ida-Wyman|title=Monroe Gallery of Photography announced the death of photographer Ida Wyman|website=artdaily.com|access-date=2019-07-20|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190729135957/http://artdaily.com/news/115340/Monroe-Gallery-of-Photography-announced-the-death-of-photographer-Ida-Wyman|archive-date=2019-07-29|url-status=live}}&lt;/ref&gt;

==References==
{{Reflist}}

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}
[[Category:1926 births]]
[[Category:2019 deaths]]</text>
      <sha1>mq92jw1xtmiu7cugtxaq05ka6uelavb</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sani Abacha</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309531</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964867</id>
      <parentid>3963666</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:54:42Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964867</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="969" sha1="t9jdxpbjn69scvkvhzh41qgdvppvcak" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Sani Abacha}}''' GCFR (20 September 1943 – 8 June 1998) was a Nigerian military dictator and statesman who ruled Nigeria as military head of state from 1993, following a palace coup d'état, until his death in 1998.
==Quotes==
*I think the major problem was the unity and the stability of the nation itself, its territorial integrity and existence as it is. That was the major problem because there was even part of the country that was threatening to secede, and Nigerians who had lived their own lives in parts of the country different from their own ethnic origin were feeling threatened and...moving back into their own cultural locations. So, that was one of the most difficult challenges facing us - the unity, the stability of the country.
** [https://www.nairaland.com/894913/abachas-rare-interview-1997]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Abacha, Sani}}
[[Category:1943 births]]
[[Category:1998 deaths]]
[[Category:Nigerian politicians]]</text>
      <sha1>t9jdxpbjn69scvkvhzh41qgdvppvcak</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964869</id>
      <parentid>3964867</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:55:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>stubbed</comment>
      <origin>3964869</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="989" sha1="rnzc9i901la9j2hv9fxseko0be9ut6j" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Sani Abacha}}''' GCFR (20 September 1943 – 8 June 1998) was a Nigerian military dictator and statesman who ruled Nigeria as military head of state from 1993, following a palace coup d'état, until his death in 1998.

{{Political-stub}}
==Quotes==
*I think the major problem was the unity and the stability of the nation itself, its territorial integrity and existence as it is. That was the major problem because there was even part of the country that was threatening to secede, and Nigerians who had lived their own lives in parts of the country different from their own ethnic origin were feeling threatened and...moving back into their own cultural locations. So, that was one of the most difficult challenges facing us - the unity, the stability of the country.
** [https://www.nairaland.com/894913/abachas-rare-interview-1997]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Abacha, Sani}}
[[Category:1943 births]]
[[Category:1998 deaths]]
[[Category:Nigerian politicians]]</text>
      <sha1>rnzc9i901la9j2hv9fxseko0be9ut6j</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Seriki Williams Abass</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309533</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964871</id>
      <parentid>3963671</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:59:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964871</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="607" sha1="abqc3itx7vbg9uz0wvci5y47rzeomm9" xml:space="preserve">'''Seriki Williams Abass''' (born Ifaremilekun Fagbemi; c. 1835 – 11 June 1919) was a slave merchant in present-day southern Nigeria during the 19th century who became the &quot;Paramount Ruler&quot; of Badagry within the indirect rule structure established by the British.

{{People-stub}}
==Quotes==
*Arise is the storyteller, and the storyteller is the father of folklore; many of the things we do today will become history tomorrow.
**[https://www.bbc.com/yoruba/articles/cgm1xgdrxd0o]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Abass, Seriki Williams}}
[[Category:1830 births]]
[[Category:1919 deaths]]</text>
      <sha1>abqc3itx7vbg9uz0wvci5y47rzeomm9</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964872</id>
      <parentid>3964871</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:00:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>original text</comment>
      <origin>3964872</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="724" sha1="0wnugbn6x1a2605or5fqux8288rwcbd" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Seriki Williams Abass}}''' (born Ifaremilekun Fagbemi; c. 1835 – 11 June 1919) was a slave merchant in present-day southern Nigeria during the 19th century who became the &quot;Paramount Ruler&quot; of Badagry within the indirect rule structure established by the British.

{{People-stub}}
==Quotes==
* Arise ni arika, arika si ni baba iregun, ọpọ ohun ti a ba se ni oni, n bọ wa di itan to ba di ọla.
** Arise is the storyteller, and the storyteller is the father of folklore; many of the things we do today will become history tomorrow.
**[https://www.bbc.com/yoruba/articles/cgm1xgdrxd0o]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Abass, Seriki Williams}}
[[Category:1830 births]]
[[Category:1919 deaths]]</text>
      <sha1>0wnugbn6x1a2605or5fqux8288rwcbd</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964875</id>
      <parentid>3964872</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:02:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>added thumbnail</comment>
      <origin>3964875</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="765" sha1="jk3fjuapws00ijdmfmlcibmyvjafnmd" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Seriki Williams Abass.png|thumb]]
'''{{w|Seriki Williams Abass}}''' (born Ifaremilekun Fagbemi; c. 1835 – 11 June 1919) was a slave merchant in present-day southern Nigeria during the 19th century who became the &quot;Paramount Ruler&quot; of Badagry within the indirect rule structure established by the British.

{{People-stub}}
==Quotes==
* Arise ni arika, arika si ni baba iregun, ọpọ ohun ti a ba se ni oni, n bọ wa di itan to ba di ọla.
** Arise is the storyteller, and the storyteller is the father of folklore; many of the things we do today will become history tomorrow.
**[https://www.bbc.com/yoruba/articles/cgm1xgdrxd0o]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Abass, Seriki Williams}}
[[Category:1830 births]]
[[Category:1919 deaths]]</text>
      <sha1>jk3fjuapws00ijdmfmlcibmyvjafnmd</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964877</id>
      <parentid>3964875</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:03:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* External Links */</comment>
      <origin>3964877</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="788" sha1="gz9331k90sfwvh9a1gypubnnqnr9r89" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Seriki Williams Abass.png|thumb]]
'''{{w|Seriki Williams Abass}}''' (born Ifaremilekun Fagbemi; c. 1835 – 11 June 1919) was a slave merchant in present-day southern Nigeria during the 19th century who became the &quot;Paramount Ruler&quot; of Badagry within the indirect rule structure established by the British.

{{People-stub}}
==Quotes==
* Arise ni arika, arika si ni baba iregun, ọpọ ohun ti a ba se ni oni, n bọ wa di itan to ba di ọla.
** Arise is the storyteller, and the storyteller is the father of folklore; many of the things we do today will become history tomorrow.
**[https://www.bbc.com/yoruba/articles/cgm1xgdrxd0o]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Abass, Seriki Williams}}
[[Category:1830 births]]
[[Category:1919 deaths]]</text>
      <sha1>gz9331k90sfwvh9a1gypubnnqnr9r89</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>D. M. Aderibigbe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309546</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964838</id>
      <parentid>3963726</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:24:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964838</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2143" sha1="p1mxy7ubwufqc8qpowxwras2hzqrz2q" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Damilola Michael Aderibigbe.jpg|thumb]]
'''{{W|D. M. Aderibigbe}}''' (born 1989) is a Nigerian poet based in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. He is an assistant professor of creative writing in the Center for Writers at the University of Southern Mississippi. He is the author of the debut collection of poems, How the End First Showed, which won the Brittingham Prize in Poetry, among other honors. In 2024, Aderibigbe's poetry collection, 82nd Division, was selected for the National Poetry Series, one of the most prestigious poetry book awards in the United States.

== Quotes ==
*I can’t remember the exact title of the poem, but I can still smell the smoke from the danfo bus’s tired tailpipe—I can still feel the boiling breeze of that afternoon. It was the day after the last day of my first year at the University of Lagos. I was on the way to my grandmother’s house in Ikotun.
**[https://www.frontierpoetry.com/2025/11/25/dm-aderibigbe-interview/]

*The Hungry Man.” It’s a poem about one evening when my father returned from one of his long absences and found that the pot of yams on the stove was only for my mother, me, and my two sisters. In a fit of rage, he kicked the pot off the stove and stormed out of the house. This poem is the oldest surviving piece in my first collection and also embodies most of the themes in the collection: my father’s absence from home, his rage, and the manifestation of that rage on my mother’s face.
**[https://www.frontierpoetry.com/2025/11/25/dm-aderibigbe-interview/]

*In the middle of the newspaper, under a section titled “Arts and Society,” there was a profile of the Nigerian poet Cecilia Kato. It was the first time I had ever read about a living poet or that poetry could be about anything. This incident on the bus breathed into my dormant imagination. That evening, I wrote a poem about my mother’s untimely death. It was the first time I heard the voice of my grief.
**[https://www.frontierpoetry.com/2025/11/25/dm-aderibigbe-interview/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Aderibigbe, D.M.}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1989 births]]</text>
      <sha1>p1mxy7ubwufqc8qpowxwras2hzqrz2q</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Alexandra Abrahams</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309550</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964836</id>
      <parentid>3963732</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:20:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964836</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2472" sha1="i1ivfyx71z02psqlqcoy593utaz14ar" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Alexandra Abrahams}}''' (born 13 July 1986) is a South African politician who has been the Deputy Minister of Electricity and Energy since June 2026 and a Member of the National Assembly since May 2019. She was the Deputy Minister of Trade, Industry and Competition between November 2025 and June 2026. She served as Shadow Deputy Minister of Social Development from December 2020 until June 2024. Abrahams is a member of the Democratic Alliance.

== Quotes ==
*I represent the Democratic Alliance in my capacity as Member of Parliament (MP) on the Portfolio Committee on Social Development. As MPs we have input in agenda items, however, most of the agenda is made up of statutory items such as annual reports, quarterly target and budget reports for the Department of Social Development (DSD) and its entities, SASSA and the National Development Agency (NDA). We also interrogate new and amended pieces of legislation, which follows a strict process as per the National Assembly rules.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/social-development-month-interview-alexandra-abrah]

*With 8 years of experience in social development prior to joining Parliament and the Committee in 2019, I believe this is a portfolio that requires compassion as well as knowledge and understanding of the functions and programmes of the department and its entities.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/social-development-month-interview-alexandra-abrah]

*Our primary role is to hold the Minister, department and its entities to account on the impact and shortcomings of various DSD programmes, as well as to highlight matters which are raised by our constituents.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/social-development-month-interview-alexandra-abrah]

*Social development addresses concerns which directly affect vulnerable groups of society such as women, children, seniors and persons living with disabilities. Social ills such as gender-based violence, substance abuse and child abuse for example are prevalent in South Africa. DSD cannot act in isolation, but it is the primary department under which many social ills can be addressed.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/social-development-month-interview-alexandra-abrah]


== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
*[https://www.parliament.gov.za/person-details/2 Ms Alexandra Lilian Amelia Abrahams] at Parliament of South Africa


{{DEFAULTSORT:Abrahams, Alexandra}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1986 births]]
[[Category:South African politicians]]</text>
      <sha1>i1ivfyx71z02psqlqcoy593utaz14ar</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Eghosa Imasuen</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309614</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964909</id>
      <parentid>3963965</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:45:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Confidence24</username>
        <id>3337269</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964909</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2738" sha1="jb8p8vgpfwt0a3qzl59fwf6poye1jsw" xml:space="preserve">'''Eghosa Imasuen''' (born 19 May 1976) is a Nigerian novelist, medical doctor, and publisher. He is the co-founder of Narrative Landscape Press and is highly regarded for his realistic literary representations of youth culture, post-Biafra identity, and campus life in 1990s Nigeria.

== Quotes ==

* Nemesis, she was too slow. She was a crippled, ineffective, bitter old bitch.
** [https://literaryeverything.com/2018/05/10/fine-boys-by-eghosa-imaseun/]''Fine Boys'' (2012), character reflection on justice and campus violence, text excerpt reviewed via ''Literary Everything Archive''.

* The light that seeped in through the sheer curtains bathed everything in a blue translucence that made the room look like one of those Igbo market shops where the most awful pair of jeans miraculously became a pair of Versace specials.
** [https://xokigbo.com/2012/07/23/eghosa-imasuen-on-fine-boys-and-yellow-girls/] Descriptive prose illustrating urban environments, ''Fine Boys'' (2012), cited in literary essays on ''Pa Ikhide Literary Review''.

* It is almost impossible to make a commercial case for these stories beyond the fact that there will always be people who want to read stories that are well told. I publish what I want to read, and believe strongly that there are many people like me who also want to read that work.
** [https://www.readcommunique.com/p/publishing-african-narrative-non-fiction] Discussing the financial landscape of African publishing, interviewed in ''The Communiqué''  (June 2026).

*&quot;‘Fine Boys’ is my most satisfying work to write so far. It did not take a lot from me as its characters were living a life that I had lived. I think what it gave me was the satisfaction of seeing these characters speak as my friends and I spoke. I also saw that these lives were now important enough to be in a book.&quot;
**[https://punchng.com/most-pirated-books-imported-eghosa-imasuen/]

*&quot;The satisfaction an author derives and the reward they seek is to have their work read and loved by readers.&quot;
**[https://punchng.com/most-pirated-books-imported-eghosa-imasuen/]

*&quot;Nigeria can begin to overcome book piracy by ensuring that piracy is painful for the pirates. Right now, the theft of intellectual property is perceived as a victimless crime. There is nothing like a fake book.&quot;
**[https://punchng.com/most-pirated-books-imported-eghosa-imasuen/]

*&quot;Authors can help in nation building by creating and becoming an industry. Also, by becoming the conscience and mirror for their societies.&quot;
*8[https://punchng.com/most-pirated-books-imported-eghosa-imasuen/]


== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:1976 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Nigerian writers]]
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]</text>
      <sha1>jb8p8vgpfwt0a3qzl59fwf6poye1jsw</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Chukwuebuka Ibeh</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309676</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964883</id>
      <parentid>3964235</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:13:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Confidence24</username>
        <id>3337269</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964883</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2994" sha1="qq89bzv20ti36oi41we9o5o01fla6jn" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Chukwuebuka Ibeh|Chukwuebuka Ibeh]]''' (born 2000) is a Nigerian novelist and short story writer. He is best known for his debut novel, ''Blessings'' which was published in 2024 by Penguin Random House under its Viking imprint. His work explores LGBT+ identity in Nigeria and examines the impact of the Same Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Act on the lives of queer Nigerians.

== Quotes ==
* &quot;Too many times the headlines from northern Nigeria read 'Boko Haram', but there are several other stories that beg to be told.&quot;
** [https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2025/jan/10/anti-gay-law-nigerian-novelist-book-chukwuebuka-ibeh-blessings-chimamanda-ngozi-adichie Speaking on the need for nuanced stories about Nigeria]

* &quot;When it comes to northern Nigeria, there's no demand for nuance.&quot;
** [https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2025/jan/10/anti-gay-law-nigerian-novelist-book-chukwuebuka-ibeh-blessings-chimamanda-ngozi-adichie On stereotypes about northern Nigeria]

* &quot;I have been telling stories in some form for as far back as I can recall.&quot;
** [https://www.afreada.com/interviews/chukwuebuka-ibeh Speaking on how he began writing]

* &quot;The magic for me back then was the response of the audience.&quot;
** [https://www.afreada.com/interviews/chukwuebuka-ibeh Reflecting on his childhood storytelling]

* &quot;I don't know that I had an exact moment of epiphany.&quot;
** [https://thenationonlineng.net/how-i-wrote-blessings-by-chukwuebuka-ibeh/ On discovering his passion for writing] 

* &quot;I also have always wanted to understand the Same Sex Marriage Prohibition Act.&quot;
** [https://aceworldpgs.com/celerbating-chukwuebuka-ibeh/ Speaking on the inspiration behind ''Blessings'']

* &quot;I think the earliest I recall of wanting to be an author was getting my first paycheck from writing (in a foreign currency, I might add), and also after being selected and attending Adichie’s workshop. It suddenly seemed possible - that I could, in fact, make a living from this and didn’t have to approach it as a side hobby.&quot;
**[https://www.afreada.com/interviews/chukwuebuka-ibeh] 

*&quot;I’ve always wanted to write a story about boarding school in Nigeria. It is such a fascinating place with so many stories, and yet doesn’t get half the attention it deserves, in my opinion.&quot;
**[https://www.afreada.com/interviews/chukwuebuka-ibeh] 

*&quot;It’s just heartwarming to know that an ordinary story of an ordinary boy in Port Harcourt can be received as relatable to readers around the world.&quot;
**[https://www.afreada.com/interviews/chukwuebuka-ibeh]

*&quot;I was very fortunate to have a very kind and accommodating community - both my editors and my writing professors were patient and understanding when I needed extensions.&quot;
**[https://www.afreada.com/interviews/chukwuebuka-ibeh]

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ibeh, Chukwuebuka}}

[[Category:2000 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Short story writers from Nigeria]]</text>
      <sha1>qq89bzv20ti36oi41we9o5o01fla6jn</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Echezonachukwu Nduka</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309687</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964969</id>
      <parentid>3964259</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:43:03Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964969</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4805" sha1="s39eqgl2hc8vpq5kpjajouq2c2nxihb" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Echezonachukwu Chinedu Nduka|Echezonachukwu Chinedu Nduka]]'''(born 19 July 1989) is a Nigerian poet, pianist, author, recording artist, and ethnomusicologist specializing in African pianism by West African composers. His work has been featured on BBC, Radio Nacional Clasica de Argentina, Radio France International (rfi), and Classical Journey.
==Quotes==
*now that the streets are stripped
and keys lock themselves in defiance,
should nudity blind the eyes of minors?
now that the streets are filled with dry tongues
and streams dry at daybreak,
from whence should spittle flow as fountains?
**[https://www.poemhunter.com/echezonachukwu-nduka/] A poem on Renaissance 
*you are a lad whose songs suspend all chaos
as every tongue is tempted to test a divisive theory;
your lyrics are now dead that lights the lone candle.
plucked from thorns—dry are the roses thrown at your feet.
yours is a blind eye that tell stories of yesteryear;
yet, these stories rename themselves every passing day.
a strange cloud fills your head and forms a note:
the keeper of this mind has lost his job.
go home and await a worthy rebel.
**[https://www.poemhunter.com/echezonachukwu-nduka/]
*I like to think of poems as living beings with traits because while some take very little time to write, others take a while—and sometimes I come away with the feeling that I may never finish a poem.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/poets-talk-5-questions-with-echezonachukwu-nduka/]
*
I like to think of poems as living beings with traits because while some take very little time to write, others take a while—and sometimes I come away with the feeling that I may never finish a poem. I would like to talk about how I consider rewriting a poem quite a bit of hard work, but I would rather not.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/poets-talk-5-questions-with-echezonachukwu-nduka/] He talks about the process of writing a poem to him.
*If any of my poems could literarily save a person’s life, I would be most amazed by both the poem and the person whose life it saved. That would be nothing short of a miracle!
**[https://shamsrumi.org/poets-talk-5-questions-with-echezonachukwu-nduka/]
*Complex. Historic. Diverse. Rich. . . Hope. Perseverance. Hallmark of cultural legacies. Revival. Vibrant youth. Poor political leadership. The continent is an overwhelming web of paradoxes. I like to think of Africa as loud drumbeats that keep re-echoing, in spite of efforts to shut off the sound. Africa is not only the dance bank that fascinates the world with each new step, it’s also the fundamental rhythm to which all of the world must connect.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/poets-talk-5-questions-with-echezonachukwu-nduka/] He talks about what Africa means to him.
*Blessed are the undefiled in the way.
There are two ways to view the body.
Resurrection and crucifixion.
Everything that falls between is ritual.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/poets-talk-5-questions-with-echezonachukwu-nduka/] He talks about his favourite lines in a poem.

* &quot;Both worlds were there from the beginning, but music influenced my imagination first as a listener, long before I became a curious reader.&quot;
** [https://iselemagazine.com/2022/02/05/echezonachukwu-nduka-on-classical-music-poetry-and-african-pianism-as-cultural-revolution/ Reflecting on his early exposure to music and literature]

* &quot;Whatever I wrote as a child were attempts to recreate what I read and imagined.&quot;
** [https://iselemagazine.com/2022/02/05/echezonachukwu-nduka-on-classical-music-poetry-and-african-pianism-as-cultural-revolution/ Speaking on his childhood writing]

* &quot;African pianism is the point where Western classical music and African indigenous music converge.&quot;
** [https://iselemagazine.com/2022/02/05/echezonachukwu-nduka-on-classical-music-poetry-and-african-pianism-as-cultural-revolution/ Defining African pianism]

* &quot;The soundscape reassures me of the endless possibilities in classical music and the question of borderless identities.&quot;
** [https://iselemagazine.com/2022/02/05/echezonachukwu-nduka-on-classical-music-poetry-and-african-pianism-as-cultural-revolution/ Speaking on African pianism and classical music]

* &quot;I was listening to a lot of jazz music, thinking about Black history, the civil rights movement, and the place of music in the struggle for liberation and preservation of memory.&quot;
** [https://iselemagazine.com/2023/04/24/five-questions-echezonachukwu-nduka/ On the inspiration behind his shortlisted poems]

* &quot;The liberation to which I refer is both personal and collective.&quot;
** [https://iselemagazine.com/2023/04/24/five-questions-echezonachukwu-nduka/ Reflecting on the themes in his poetry]
== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Nduka, Echezonachukwu}}

[[Category:1989 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Nigerian poets]]</text>
      <sha1>s39eqgl2hc8vpq5kpjajouq2c2nxihb</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Helen Ovbiagele</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309758</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964880</id>
      <parentid>3964393</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:04:51Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Mojex02</username>
        <id>3136973</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added quotes #Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3964880</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3460" sha1="i27ex524oqxj01doldisn8vibjbil9n" xml:space="preserve">[[Helen Ovbiagele]] (born 1944) is a [[Nigerian people|Nigerian]] [[Authors|novelist]]. She was born in Benin City, and after attending C.M.S. Girls' School, Benin City, and St. Peter's College, Kaduna, she studied English and French at the University of Lagos and studied at the Institut Français du Royaume-Uni in [[London]]. Her work is associated with the romance genre, published in Macmillan's hugely popular Pacesetter Novels series, but her heroines are said to be a bit older and more independent than normal for that form. She was the Woman Editor of the Vanguard newspaper for 30 years.

==Quotes==
*In those early days of ‘cut and paste’, newspaper production was rigorous, and it was frustrating when the work you submitted came out with flaws when published.  I used to get all worked up when my articles were messed up because I felt that the reading public would question my ability to write good English.
**[https://www.vanguardngr.com/2024/07/uncle-sam-has-an-eye-for-excellence-helen-ovbiagele-first-woman-editor/amp/ Helen speaking on how early days in vanguard was like]

*My dream for the VANGUARD is that it will continue to be refreshingly different from other publications, and go on working towards a better life for the people, until the masses are liberated from all the suffering and hardships in present day Nigeria.
**[https://www.vanguardngr.com/2024/07/uncle-sam-has-an-eye-for-excellence-helen-ovbiagele-first-woman-editor/amp/ Helen's goodwill message for the vanguard 40th anniversary.]

* Parading girls who dumped their babies might make the offenders remorseful or shame-faced but it isn't going to stop the practice for desperate girls with unwanted babies, just like jail terms haven't stopped criminal activities or even reduced them.
* We should reprimand seriously, girls who dump their babies, but there's no need to expose them to public ridicule, increasing their pain and humiliation.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/06/dumped-babies-their-mothers-need-help-not-ridicule/ Helen decring the practice of parading desperate young mothers who had abandoned their babies.]

* Consider the trauma of their nine-month ordeal of unsupported pregnancy, and the agony of secret childbirth. Obviously, they must have delivered their baby themselves under unsafe conditions and environments. They should receive medical attention to ensure that their womb and all things connected with childbirth are in order.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/06/dumped-babies-their-mothers-need-help-not-ridicule/ On the need for rehabilitation, not humiliation.]

* No matter how you package the concept of living together before marriage, it cannot be right for the society. We shouldn't ape the permissiveness and decadence of the western world. The old values of strict moral values which we're struggling to uphold here, are still the best for the institution of marriage.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/09/relationship-old-vs-new-values/#google_vignette/ Tracking how Westernization reshaped local relationships.] 

* If women want to be respected by the world, they will have to do more to uplift their image themselves. They shouldn’t feel that because they rear children for the world and keep homes, they are entitled to respect, irrespective of their own behaviour and character.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/02/re-global-ploy-to-debase-womanhood/#google_vignette/ Helen on women and self respect.]</text>
      <sha1>i27ex524oqxj01doldisn8vibjbil9n</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964882</id>
      <parentid>3964880</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:09:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Mojex02</username>
        <id>3136973</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Added external link #Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3964882</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3618" sha1="er4sx1eemxctqtz2lpzthrexy2t2qqq" xml:space="preserve">[[Helen Ovbiagele]] (born 1944) is a [[Nigerian people|Nigerian]] [[Authors|novelist]]. She was born in Benin City, and after attending C.M.S. Girls' School, Benin City, and St. Peter's College, Kaduna, she studied English and French at the University of Lagos and studied at the Institut Français du Royaume-Uni in [[London]]. Her work is associated with the romance genre, published in Macmillan's hugely popular Pacesetter Novels series, but her heroines are said to be a bit older and more independent than normal for that form. She was the Woman Editor of the Vanguard newspaper for 30 years.

==Quotes==
*In those early days of ‘cut and paste’, newspaper production was rigorous, and it was frustrating when the work you submitted came out with flaws when published.  I used to get all worked up when my articles were messed up because I felt that the reading public would question my ability to write good English.
**[https://www.vanguardngr.com/2024/07/uncle-sam-has-an-eye-for-excellence-helen-ovbiagele-first-woman-editor/amp/ Helen speaking on how early days in vanguard was like]

*My dream for the VANGUARD is that it will continue to be refreshingly different from other publications, and go on working towards a better life for the people, until the masses are liberated from all the suffering and hardships in present day Nigeria.
**[https://www.vanguardngr.com/2024/07/uncle-sam-has-an-eye-for-excellence-helen-ovbiagele-first-woman-editor/amp/ Helen's goodwill message for the vanguard 40th anniversary.]

* Parading girls who dumped their babies might make the offenders remorseful or shame-faced but it isn't going to stop the practice for desperate girls with unwanted babies, just like jail terms haven't stopped criminal activities or even reduced them.
* We should reprimand seriously, girls who dump their babies, but there's no need to expose them to public ridicule, increasing their pain and humiliation.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/06/dumped-babies-their-mothers-need-help-not-ridicule/ Helen decring the practice of parading desperate young mothers who had abandoned their babies.]

* Consider the trauma of their nine-month ordeal of unsupported pregnancy, and the agony of secret childbirth. Obviously, they must have delivered their baby themselves under unsafe conditions and environments. They should receive medical attention to ensure that their womb and all things connected with childbirth are in order.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/06/dumped-babies-their-mothers-need-help-not-ridicule/ On the need for rehabilitation, not humiliation.]

* No matter how you package the concept of living together before marriage, it cannot be right for the society. We shouldn't ape the permissiveness and decadence of the western world. The old values of strict moral values which we're struggling to uphold here, are still the best for the institution of marriage.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/09/relationship-old-vs-new-values/#google_vignette/ Tracking how Westernization reshaped local relationships.] 

* If women want to be respected by the world, they will have to do more to uplift their image themselves. They shouldn’t feel that because they rear children for the world and keep homes, they are entitled to respect, irrespective of their own behaviour and character.
** [https://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/02/re-global-ploy-to-debase-womanhood/#google_vignette/ Helen on women and self-respect.]

== External links== 
{{Wikipedia}} 

{{DEFAULTSORT:(Last name, First name)}}
[[Category:(Occupation)]]
[[Category:(Nationality)]]
[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>er4sx1eemxctqtz2lpzthrexy2t2qqq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>There's No Time for Love, Charlie Brown</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309761</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964954</id>
      <parentid>3964419</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:19:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Dialogue */</comment>
      <origin>3964954</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2159" sha1="nltk5t2skwsvy8uohp5hlwuvdzsjjvj" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:There's No Time for Love, Charlie Brown|There's No Time for Love, Charlie Brown]]''''' is the ninth [[w:Prime time|prime-time]] animated [[w:Television special|television special]] based upon the comic strip ''[[w:Peanuts|Peanuts]]'', by [[w:Charles M. Schulz|Charles M. Schulz]]. This marks the on-screen debut of [[w:Marcie|Marcie]], who first appeared on the comic strip in 1971. The special originally aired on the [[w:CBS|CBS]] network on March 11, 1973. The first half of the special is presented as a series of sketches based on various Peanuts strips, while the second half depicts Charlie Brown's erroneous trip to a supermarket, mistaken for an art museum.

==Dialogue==
:'''Charlie Brown:''' ''[Charlie Brown and Sally walk to school]'' You're really something, do you know that? I've never seen anyone who was so uptight about school. Why don't you just relax?
:'''Sally:''' ''[next scene; Sally stands on her chair in the classroom and has a nervous look on her face]'' Who can relax?

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Linus van Pelt:''' Problem number 5: &quot;A man has a daughter and a son. The son is 3 years older than the daughter. In 1 year, the man will be 6 times as old as the daughter is now; and in 10 years, he'll be 14 years older than the combined ages of his children. What is the man's present age?&quot;
:'''Lucy van Pelt:''' I'm sorry. We are unable to complete your call. Please check the number and dial again.

&lt;hr width=50%&gt;
:'''Linus van Pelt:''' The new math is too much for me!
:'''Lucy van Pelt:''' You'll get on to it. It just takes time.
:'''Linus van Pelt:''' Not me. I'll never get on to it! How can you do new math problems with an old math mind?

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0070793|title=There's No Time for Love, Charlie Brown}}

[[Category:1973 animated films]] [[Category:1973 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:CBS shows]]
[[Category:Peanuts TV specials]]
[[Category:Valentine's Day TV specials]]
[[Category:Television programs based on comics]]
[[Category:Films directed by Bill Melendez]]</text>
      <sha1>nltk5t2skwsvy8uohp5hlwuvdzsjjvj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Adewale Maja-Pearce</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309762</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965024</id>
      <parentid>3964423</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:34:03Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965024</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2969" sha1="f0gq5fvm41ruh6s1rxlf86ew9i4bpl5" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Adewale Maja-Pearce|Adewale Maje-Pearce]]''' (born 1953) is an Anglo-Nigerian writer, journalist and literary critic, who is best known for his documentary essays. He is the author of several books, including the memoirs ''In My Father's Country'' (1987), ''The House My Father Built'' (2014), several other non-fiction titles, and a collection of short stories entitled ''Loyalties and Other Stories'' (1986).

==Quotes==
*There were no fictional bits. Everything happened as I wrote it. Indeed, I had to downplay some of the more outrageous antics of the characters, particularly the now late Prince, who started off as a God-send while I was battling the recalcitrant tenants before turning into a nuisance himself, and at one point hiring assassins, which landed him in Ikoyi prison.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/connecting-creativity-and-criticism-a-conversation-with-adewale-maja-pearce/]

*I don’t think it is possible for me to say, for the simple reason that I am too close to it; only time will give us that perspective, and by then, we won’t be around.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/connecting-creativity-and-criticism-a-conversation-with-adewale-maja-pearce/]

*I think we could do with far less of critical literature. But I have no strong feelings about this comparison.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/connecting-creativity-and-criticism-a-conversation-with-adewale-maja-pearce/]

*I would say particular books, poems, essays and short stories. I dislike the modern veneration of the writer qua writer as distinct from their work. The first book that opened me up to the magic of language was The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by CS Lewis, which I read when I was seven. Six decades later, I still remember where I was sitting in my bedroom overlooking the lagoon at the bottom of the garden and not wanting it to finish.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/connecting-creativity-and-criticism-a-conversation-with-adewale-maja-pearce/]

*Go for it, but then I have been enormously lucky. The point is not to be afraid of pursuing your dreams. They are all we really have; they are who we are. Life is pointless otherwise.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/connecting-creativity-and-criticism-a-conversation-with-adewale-maja-pearce/]

*In My Father’s Country was the first part of a trilogy. The House My Father built was the second. I jokingly tell people that the third one, which I haven’t written yet, will be ‘A Farewell to My Father’s Country’!
**[https://bordersliteratureonline.net/uploads/Interview_with_Adewale_Maja-Pearce_Anglo.pdf]

===Adewale Maje-Pearce works===
*The house my father built
*A peculiar tragedy 
*In my father's country 
*How many miles to Babylon 
*From khaki to agbara
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/list/71569.Adewale_Maja_Pearce]

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Maja-Pearce, Adewale}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1953 births]]</text>
      <sha1>f0gq5fvm41ruh6s1rxlf86ew9i4bpl5</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sa'adu Zungur</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309772</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964860</id>
      <parentid>3964463</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:49:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ojewuyib</username>
        <id>3173331</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice of Africa</comment>
      <origin>3964860</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2884" sha1="ocu1r6ynf2pj8aeyyy407eu0njt3h0n" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Nigerian prominent 41.jpg|thumb]]
'''Mallam Sa'adu Zungur''' was a Nigerian revolutionary, poet, jurist and nationalist who played an important role in Nigeria's independence movement particularly in Northern Nigeria. He is generally regarded as the father of 'radical politics' in Northern Nigeria. Zungur's political writings criticising the colonial government of Northern Nigeria, especially the emirate system, helped in laying the foundation for the principle of self-determination in Nigeria. His literary and political endeavors influenced a number of the leaders of the independence movement in Northern Nigeria, notably Aminu Kano and Isa Wali.
==Quotes==
* &quot;I have tried not to write this letter. I have tried to absorb myself in my condition of chronic ill-health. I have tried to put the thoughts of the destiny of Northern Nigeria behind me and tend to my own immediate personal affairs. And I cannot. I go to bed with these thoughts; I get up with them. They are there when I experience ghastly attacks of my neurotic conditions. The same thoughts are there when I say my prayers, or sit to converse with a friend or to read a local daily.&quot;
** [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sa%27adu_Zungur?utm_.com]
* &quot;Knowledge, wisdom and religion – all, and the skills to manipulate the world. We despoiled and scattered them. Today we have become a laughing stock. No birds and no snare – all lost. By Allah, we have lost the world!&quot;
*[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;As long as the North is filled with disorder and widespread corruption, with no remedy; as long as prostitution thrives, by Allah we shall suffer disgrace before the world. As long as hooligans, idlers, and wealthy youths neglect the poor, while beggars gather even in drinking places, there is no doubt that Southerners will mount the horse of Nigeria's leadership.
*&quot;[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;As long as our children continue to beg, crying, 'May Allah give you something for soup,' the Hausa people will continue to face shame in this world. In the North, brotherhood has died; pleasure and reckless indulgence have taken its place, together with pride, arrogance, superstition, and deceit.&quot;
*[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;The next three years will surely see the Northern Region cut off completely from the rest of Nigeria, under the aegis of a theocratic, one-party fascist government built on the remains of the present feudal autocracies.&quot;
*[http://%5Bhttps://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-%203d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com%5D]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons}}</text>
      <sha1>ocu1r6ynf2pj8aeyyy407eu0njt3h0n</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964865</id>
      <parentid>3964860</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:54:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ojewuyib</username>
        <id>3173331</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3964865</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2906" sha1="tdh2y0r186lct4tkxfs001e9zr1xmga" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Nigerian prominent 41.jpg|thumb]]
'''Mallam Sa'adu Zungur''' was a Nigerian revolutionary, [[Poets|poet]], [[jurist]] and nationalist who played an important role in Nigeria's independence movement particularly in Northern [[Nigeria]]. He is generally regarded as the father of 'radical politics' in Northern Nigeria. Zungur's political writings criticising the colonial government of Northern Nigeria, especially the emirate system, helped in laying the foundation for the principle of self-determination in Nigeria. His literary and political endeavors influenced a number of the leaders of the independence movement in Northern Nigeria, notably [[Aminu Kano]] and Isa Wali.
==Quotes==
* &quot;I have tried not to write this letter. I have tried to absorb myself in my condition of chronic ill-health. I have tried to put the thoughts of the destiny of Northern Nigeria behind me and tend to my own immediate personal affairs. And I cannot. I go to bed with these thoughts; I get up with them. They are there when I experience ghastly attacks of my neurotic conditions. The same thoughts are there when I say my prayers, or sit to converse with a friend or to read a local daily.&quot;
** [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sa%27adu_Zungur?utm_.com]
* &quot;Knowledge, wisdom and religion – all, and the skills to manipulate the world. We despoiled and scattered them. Today we have become a laughing stock. No birds and no snare – all lost. By Allah, we have lost the world!&quot;
*[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;As long as the North is filled with disorder and widespread corruption, with no remedy; as long as prostitution thrives, by Allah we shall suffer disgrace before the world. As long as hooligans, idlers, and wealthy youths neglect the poor, while beggars gather even in drinking places, there is no doubt that Southerners will mount the horse of Nigeria's leadership.
*&quot;[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;As long as our children continue to beg, crying, 'May Allah give you something for soup,' the Hausa people will continue to face shame in this world. In the North, brotherhood has died; pleasure and reckless indulgence have taken its place, together with pride, arrogance, superstition, and deceit.&quot;
*[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;The next three years will surely see the Northern Region cut off completely from the rest of Nigeria, under the aegis of a theocratic, one-party fascist government built on the remains of the present feudal autocracies.&quot;
*[http://%5Bhttps://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-%203d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com%5D]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons}}</text>
      <sha1>tdh2y0r186lct4tkxfs001e9zr1xmga</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964868</id>
      <parentid>3964865</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:55:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ojewuyib</username>
        <id>3173331</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3964868</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2926" sha1="mxqh3zv9hv6dc3lr0bzg0qj7sphoqgx" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Nigerian prominent 41.jpg|thumb]]
'''Mallam Sa'adu Zungur''' was a [[Nigerian people|Nigerian]] revolutionary, [[Poets|poet]], [[jurist]] and nationalist who played an important role in Nigeria's independence movement particularly in Northern [[Nigeria]]. He is generally regarded as the father of 'radical politics' in Northern Nigeria. Zungur's political writings criticising the colonial government of Northern Nigeria, especially the emirate system, helped in laying the foundation for the principle of self-determination in Nigeria. His literary and political endeavors influenced a number of the leaders of the independence movement in Northern Nigeria, notably [[Aminu Kano]] and Isa Wali.
==Quotes==
* &quot;I have tried not to write this letter. I have tried to absorb myself in my condition of chronic ill-health. I have tried to put the thoughts of the destiny of Northern Nigeria behind me and tend to my own immediate personal affairs. And I cannot. I go to bed with these thoughts; I get up with them. They are there when I experience ghastly attacks of my neurotic conditions. The same thoughts are there when I say my prayers, or sit to converse with a friend or to read a local daily.&quot;
** [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sa%27adu_Zungur?utm_.com]
* &quot;Knowledge, wisdom and religion – all, and the skills to manipulate the world. We despoiled and scattered them. Today we have become a laughing stock. No birds and no snare – all lost. By Allah, we have lost the world!&quot;
*[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;As long as the North is filled with disorder and widespread corruption, with no remedy; as long as prostitution thrives, by Allah we shall suffer disgrace before the world. As long as hooligans, idlers, and wealthy youths neglect the poor, while beggars gather even in drinking places, there is no doubt that Southerners will mount the horse of Nigeria's leadership.
*&quot;[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;As long as our children continue to beg, crying, 'May Allah give you something for soup,' the Hausa people will continue to face shame in this world. In the North, brotherhood has died; pleasure and reckless indulgence have taken its place, together with pride, arrogance, superstition, and deceit.&quot;
*[https://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-3d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com]
* &quot;The next three years will surely see the Northern Region cut off completely from the rest of Nigeria, under the aegis of a theocratic, one-party fascist government built on the remains of the present feudal autocracies.&quot;
*[http://%5Bhttps://kubanni-backend.abu.edu.ng/server/api/core/bitstreams/bb6ce4da-2aec-443a-a6ed-%203d43bbe12257/content?utm_.com%5D]

==External Links==
{{Wikipedia}}
{{Commons}}</text>
      <sha1>mxqh3zv9hv6dc3lr0bzg0qj7sphoqgx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Joan of France, Duchess of Berry</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309792</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964847</id>
      <parentid>3964554</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:33:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964847</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1874" sha1="2u2ohrxdq1a3nnr4goh1h3326fphlck" xml:space="preserve">[[File:St. Jeanne de Valois.jpg|thumb|Saint Joan of France, Duchess of Berry]]

'''[[w:Joan of France, Duchess of Berry|Joan of France]]''' (23 April [[1464]] – 4 February [[1505]]), sometimes called '''Joan the Lame''', was briefly [[w:Queen of France|Queen of France]] as wife of King [[w:Louis XII|Louis XII]], in between the death of her brother, [[w:Charles VIII of France|King Charles VIII]], and the [[w:annulment|annulment]] of her marriage. After that, she retired to her domain, where she soon founded the [[w:Enclosed religious orders|monastic]] [[w:Order of the Annunciation of the Blessed Virgin Mary|Order of the Annunciation of the Blessed Virgin Mary]], where she served as [[w:abbess|abbess]]. From this Order later sprang the [[w:religious congregation|religious congregation]] of the Apostolic Sisters of the Annunciation, founded in 1787 to teach the children of the poor. She was [[w:canonization|canonized]] on 28 May 1950.

==Quotes==
*(To the confessor, thinking back to when [[w:Louis XII of France|Louis XII]] had annulled the marriage with her) At that moment our Lord gave me the grace that when I heard the news, he placed in my heart the conviction that God had allowed this so that I could do good, as I had so desired. I considered that I had remained with my husband the king for twenty-two years, during which I had been able to do nothing but good, nor any of those things I had a desire to do; but now I can take revenge, and it will be worth living virtuously since I am removed from a man's awe.
:*Quoted in ''[http://www.santiebeati.it/dettaglio/39600 Giovanna di Valois]'', ''santiebeati.it'', 22 June 2002.

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

[[Category:1464 births]]
[[Category:1505 deaths]]
[[Category:Monarchs from France]]
[[Category:Monks]]
[[Category:Catholics from France]]
[[Category:Catholic saints]]</text>
      <sha1>2u2ohrxdq1a3nnr4goh1h3326fphlck</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Saint Eligius</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309793</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964844</id>
      <parentid>3964558</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:30:21Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964844</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1415" sha1="ca6n2a404d1f9lp04712hoy24gcfqmh" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Petrus Christus 003.jpg|thumb|''Saint Eligius in a goldsmith's workshop'' (Petrus Christus, 1449)]]

'''[[w:Saint Eligius|Eligius]]''' (11 June 588 – 1 December 660), venerated as '''Saint Eligius''', was a Frankish goldsmith, courtier, and bishop who was chief counsellor to [[w:Dagobert I|Dagobert I]] and later [[w:Bishop of Noyon–Tournai|Bishop of Noyon–Tournai]]. His deeds were recorded in ''Vita Sancti Eligii'', written by his friend [[w:Audoin of Rouen|Audoin of Rouen]].

==Quotes about Saint Eligius==
*The case of Saint Eligius, recalled by [[w:Ernesto Rossi|Ernesto Rossi]] in connection with [[Giorgio La Pira|La Pira]], that is, an Italian Catholic whose good will neither Rossi nor we can question, was this: that Saint Eligius had set about redeeming slaves, paying the price to those who held them in slavery, and such an unexpected request obviously caused a price increase and was an incentive for pirate activity. In short, there were more slaves and at a higher price.
:*[[q:it:Salvatore Silvano Nigro|Salvatore Silvano Nigro]], quoted in ''La funesta docilità'', Sellerio, Palermo, 2018. ISBN 88-389-3856-3, p. 133.

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Eligius}}
[[Category:6th century births]]
[[Category:660s deaths]]
[[Category:Goldsmiths]]
[[Category:Catholics from France]]
[[Category:Roman Catholic bishops]]
[[Category:Catholic saints]]</text>
      <sha1>ca6n2a404d1f9lp04712hoy24gcfqmh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Guillaume Courtet</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309803</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964843</id>
      <parentid>3964584</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:27:18Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>stubbed</comment>
      <origin>3964843</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1632" sha1="ppshj3wm3ofvtg1tyrpgxb6mr5imkyl" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Courtet20 01 07.jpg|thumb|Guillaume Courtet]]

'''[[w:Guillaume Courtet|Guillaume Courtet]]''', O.P. (1589–1637) was a French [[w:Dominican order|Dominican]] [[w:friar|friar]], [[w:Catholic priest|Catholic priest]], and missionary. One of the first Frenchman to have visited [[w:Japan|Japan]], he died as a martyr by beheading in [[w:Nagasaki|Nagasaki]] at the hands of the [[w:Tokugawa Shogunate|Tokugawa Shogunate]]  on [[w:Michaelmas Day|Michaelmas Day]] 1637 after three days continuous torture. He was canonised by [[Pope John Paul II]] in 1987 as one of the [[w:16 Martyrs of Japan|16 Martyrs of Japan]]. He is celebrated annually on the September 28th as one of the 16 and on November 6th as one of the [[w:Thomasian Martyrs|Thomasian Martyrs]].

{{Religion-stub}}
==Quotes==
*I would always boast... of being mocked, even crucified... in truth, according to the example of [[Jesus|Jesus Christ]]. Pray to God that he likes to make me worthy of this great good.
:*From the ''Letter to Fr. Adriani'', 30 August 1628; quoted in [[Pope John Paul II]], ''[https://w2.vatican.va/content/john-paul-ii/it/speeches/1987/october/documents/hf_jp-ii_spe_19871019_pellegrini.html Ai fedeli giapponesi, francesi, spagnoli ed italiani convenuti a Roma per la canonizzazione dei 16 martiri di Nagasaki]'', ''vatican.va'', 19 October 1987.

==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT|Courtet, Guillaume}}
[[Category:1589 births]]
[[Category:1637 deaths]]
[[Category:Christian monks]]
[[Category:Roman Catholic priests]]
[[Category:Martyrs]]
[[Category:Catholics from France]]
[[Category:Catholic saints]]</text>
      <sha1>ppshj3wm3ofvtg1tyrpgxb6mr5imkyl</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Obo Aba Hisanjani</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309850</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964849</id>
      <parentid>3964811</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:36:53Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3964849</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4123" sha1="l08dk9c3qltq4n1yajjjj09sucer7ll" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Obo Aba Hisanjani}}''' (born 24 November 1949) is a Nigerian poet.

==Quotes==
*My first contact with Alaafin actually was the beginning of last year, but I have been in Oyo already for a while, coming and going.
**[https://yeyeolade.wordpress.com/category/ede-yoruba/]
*I came to Oyo because of the culture. I used to come to Nigeria while I was a student of History about 20 years ago. I know Yoruba land though I cannot say very well but quite well; 20 years ago was the first time I came to Oyo and I thought there was no more culture in Oyo. When you talk about culture, culture is in everything, food, literature, the way you dress. All this time while I was a student, I always shuttled between Osogbo and Oyo. With time and mixing together with people, I saw that a lot of cultures came from the ancient town of Oyo Ile. That is why I actually came to Oyo to make more research on it.
**[https://yeyeolade.wordpress.com/category/ede-yoruba/]
*No, I’m not going to leave, I’m just telling you that while I was a student, I used to come to do research and after that I came to Oyo not on my private interest to know more but because Oyo had nothing to offer more about their own culture. If you go back to the history, you will know that Oyo Empire dominated all the kingdoms in Yorubaland and you as well know that it was when Alaafin Sango was a very strong king ruling, actually during the 7th or 8th century, that the influence of Oyo Empire in Yorubaland was massive. And much of the culture in our day not only in Yorubaland but also in the Diaspora, everything was connected to Sango. That was why I came here to know more about him and like I said, I have been around for four years. There is a lot here to be preserved because that is the history of a ethnic group that has survived outside and is really appreciated.
**[https://yeyeolade.wordpress.com/category/ede-yoruba/]
*In Europe nowadays, we are looking for the ancient culture that has something to give to the humanity because what we are expecting from life is to live long and to live long with quality, you can have a good car, you can have lots of money but if your body is not in the equilibrium, if you die young, what is the essence of life? Life is long life with quality and quality means first of all, your body has to be strong, has to be healthy and the philosophy and the knowledge of the Yoruba is like the philosophy and culture from India and China.
**[https://yeyeolade.wordpress.com/category/ede-yoruba/]
*Acupuncture from India is based on lots of ancient culture, they are very similar to Yoruba culture. What we are looking for is that deep knowledge of Yoruba which they have about the nature, that you can find the equilibrium between the body and the spirit, because Yoruba believe that there is one God who is called Olodumare. Then this Creator has created, and when He created the earth, He sent the energies to the earth which are divided into four elements and these are known all over the world: water, you cannot live without water; air, you cannot live without air, that is oxygen; fire and earth.
**[https://yeyeolade.wordpress.com/category/ede-yoruba/]
*I know her very well. Like I said, I’ve been coming for 20 years, I used to be in Osogbo, so I knew Suzan Wenger very well. Actually I can say that she was and she is an inspiration for me because she really tried for Osogbo and Osun State, especially Osogbo. Today, what is there, people should be very grateful because if not for her who fought for it, it would have gone long time ago. She really preserved what people who said were the bush, the history of Osun Osogbo. Every people has its own history. People are crazy to travel abroad to go and see our culture, let me tell you, you have to appreciate your culture as well because we preserve our culture, so you have to preserve your culture as well. That is what I’m trying to do. I know Suzanne very well.
**[https://yeyeolade.wordpress.com/category/ede-yoruba/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Hisanjani, Obo Aba}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1946 births]]</text>
      <sha1>l08dk9c3qltq4n1yajjjj09sucer7ll</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Desery Fienies</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309857</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964833</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:02:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964833</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1931" sha1="ebe6ebml8suptmw4keximnlid2lej5e" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Desery Fienies}}''' is a South African politician who has served as a Permanent Delegate to the National Council of Provinces from the Northern Cape since 2024. A member of the African National Congress, Fienies served as a member of the Northern Cape Executive Council and as a member of the Northern Cape Provincial Legislature from 2020 until 2024.

== Quotes ==
*Our aim is to establish a holistic and sustainable development agenda through the creation of this enabling environment for young people, especially the youth from disadvantaged backgrounds, including young girls and young people with disabilities
**[https://www.ofm.co.za/article/centralsa/313836/nc-mec-hails-kimberley-diamond-cup]
*Our aim as the Northern Cape, [looking at] the future of this sport in our province, is to produce world-class sports stars by exposing young people of the Northern Cape to this high-level competition like [skateboarding].
**[https://www.ofm.co.za/article/centralsa/313836/nc-mec-hails-kimberley-diamond-cup]
*The Select Committee on Social Services recognises the immense challenges faced by women, youth and persons with disabilities in our country. The Department of Women, Youth and Persons with Disabilities is central to addressing these challenges, but it is clear they require significantly more support and resources to fulfil their mandate.”
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-select-committee-social-services-engages-department-women-youth-and-persons-disabilities]
*It is unacceptable that the department tasked with advocating for and empowering some of our most vulnerable citizens is itself under-resourced and struggling to make a meaningful difference,”
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-select-committee-social-services-engages-department-women-youth-and-persons-disabilities]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}


[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>ebe6ebml8suptmw4keximnlid2lej5e</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Geraldine Fraser-Moleketi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309858</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964837</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:21:21Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964837</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2912" sha1="o5x4wdjl11t57x2bhx7jkhh9fny9k8u" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Geraldine Fraser-Moleketi}}'''  (née Fraser; born 24 August 1960) is a South African politician who was the Minister of Public Service and Administration from June 1999 to September 2008. Before that, from July 1996 to June 1999, she was Minister of Welfare and Population Development. She represented the African National Congress (ANC) in the National Assembly from 1994 to 2008 and is a former deputy chairperson of the South African Communist Party (SACP).

== Quotes ==
*I wanted to make the link that his commitment to that community came pre-election and he took it through his government years to the end of the government years and into his personal projects. I remember there were some issues about the way Madiba was putting forward such projects, because of course they needed to be supported by government programs: you needed to look at staffing, at equipment, at what is required to make sure that the schools are functional and all that. If it was not in the overall plan it did create a bit of tension. But that was also where he thought that the private sector could and should play a greater role.
**[https://tpy.nelsonmandela.org/footnotes/804-geraldine-fraser-moleketi-interview-by-tony-trew-26-july-2016]
*What I witnessed, when I sat with him in the breakfast meetings with business leaders, was the way in which he approached them to invest resources into projects and initiatives. He went into those meetings very clear that he was not going to take no for an answer, very clear that this is what he wanted and that he expected them to meet it – and it was clear there was no free breakfast, there was no free lunch. There were certain times when they provided the charter planes, and that might have been in the post-government years and there were also times when he went in the presidential plane and he would bring them with him. He was very clear what he wanted from them – and even when some of them felt discomfort in agreeing upfront, he didn’t really allow options. That happened in closed meetings and then he took them out into the communities and engaged with communities and the people.
**[https://tpy.nelsonmandela.org/footnotes/804-geraldine-fraser-moleketi-interview-by-tony-trew-26-july-2016]
*You may also recall that Madiba towards the end of that campaign and in subsequent election campaigns focused part of his time on the Northern Cape. That was because in 1994 we thought we could lose the Northern Cape or that it would be a tie. But unlike the Western Cape we won the Northern Cape and in part of that was, I think, the way the ANC mobilised in the region. But he also went out to a number of these places and communities and I accompanied him to many of these communities.
**[https://tpy.nelsonmandela.org/footnotes/804-geraldine-fraser-moleketi-interview-by-tony-trew-26-july-2016]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>o5x4wdjl11t57x2bhx7jkhh9fny9k8u</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Chinua Ezenwa-Ohaeto</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309859</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964839</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:25:03Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964839</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2400" sha1="r5om6dg0erqumrm0g2rehtxb24pu1lk" xml:space="preserve">'''Chinụa Ezenwa-Ọhaeto''' is a Nigerian poet and academic. He is the author of The Teenager Who Became My Mother, published in 2020. His full-length poetry collection, The Naming, was published by APBF via the University of Nebraska Press, 2025.
==Quotes==
*To answer this, I think I should first tell a story about how I started writing. As a kid, I wanted to be known for an invention, like Graham Bell, Galileo Galilei, Thomas Edison… you know? I wanted the sort of situation where students would be asked who invented this and they would chorus, “Chinua Ezenwa-Ohaeto!” just like I chorused famous Inventors in my class. I set my mind to inventing a wristwatch that could serve as a monitor: a sort of television. This idea died when I saw a palm-sized device used in monitoring a criminal in a movie. I went to my Dad and asked him to buy me one. After a six-month stay in Germany, he came back home with one, exactly as seen in the movie. That was how my Inventor dreams died.
* I am an African, that’s an Identity. I am a Nigerian, that’s an Identity. I am Igbo, that’s an identity. I am Imo, that’s an identity. I am from Okoro Obashi in Imo, that’s an identity. I am a boy, that’s an identity. I am Dr. Ngozi Ezenwa-Ohaeto, that’s an identity. I am Ezenwa-Ohaeto, that’s an identity.  I am Chinua, that’s an Identity. I am a poet, that’s an identity. All these I have mentioned, I assume all of them and they make me who I am.
*Africa is my identity. And, in reality, I am Africa’s identity. This space, Africa, is what I occupy. Denying it is telling myself a lie. Though, “Africa” has no single perspective and I cannot assume all its perspectives which may come in many forms: by region, by language, by religion, by politics, by country etc. I assume this singular perspective: by country― Nigerian.In detail, I am poet who happens to be an African, living in its western area, in Nigeria. I believe this makes it more definite.
*It’s very hard to choose. Really. There are many poems I have read and have been so impressed by. The poets I mentioned already impress and fascinate me greatly. Because I have to choose, I will go with Saddiq Dzukogi’s What The Poem Said. Published in Glass: A Journal of Poetry. I choose it because his poem is the first that came in mind when asked the question. Maybe, it’s because I only recently read it?
*</text>
      <sha1>r5om6dg0erqumrm0g2rehtxb24pu1lk</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964840</id>
      <parentid>3964839</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:26:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964840</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2522" sha1="q6jfq10wsultzlpxjflubwmz61piwz9" xml:space="preserve">'''Chinụa Ezenwa-Ọhaeto''' is a Nigerian poet and academic. He is the author of The Teenager Who Became My Mother, published in 2020. His full-length poetry collection, The Naming, was published by APBF via the University of Nebraska Press, 2025.
==Quotes==
*To answer this, I think I should first tell a story about how I started writing. As a kid, I wanted to be known for an invention, like Graham Bell, Galileo Galilei, Thomas Edison… you know? I wanted the sort of situation where students would be asked who invented this and they would chorus, “Chinua Ezenwa-Ohaeto!” just like I chorused famous Inventors in my class. I set my mind to inventing a wristwatch that could serve as a monitor: a sort of television. This idea died when I saw a palm-sized device used in monitoring a criminal in a movie. I went to my Dad and asked him to buy me one. After a six-month stay in Germany, he came back home with one, exactly as seen in the movie. That was how my Inventor dreams died.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/677/]
* I am an African, that’s an Identity. I am a Nigerian, that’s an Identity. I am Igbo, that’s an identity. I am Imo, that’s an identity. I am from Okoro Obashi in Imo, that’s an identity. I am a boy, that’s an identity. I am Dr. Ngozi Ezenwa-Ohaeto, that’s an identity. I am Ezenwa-Ohaeto, that’s an identity.  I am Chinua, that’s an Identity. I am a poet, that’s an identity. All these I have mentioned, I assume all of them and they make me who I am.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/677/]
*Africa is my identity. And, in reality, I am Africa’s identity. This space, Africa, is what I occupy. Denying it is telling myself a lie. Though, “Africa” has no single perspective and I cannot assume all its perspectives which may come in many forms: by region, by language, by religion, by politics, by country etc. I assume this singular perspective: by country― Nigerian.In detail, I am poet who happens to be an African, living in its western area, in Nigeria. I believe this makes it more definite.
**[https://shamsrumi.org/677/]
*It’s very hard to choose. Really. There are many poems I have read and have been so impressed by. The poets I mentioned already impress and fascinate me greatly. Because I have to choose, I will go with Saddiq Dzukogi’s What The Poem Said. Published in Glass: A Journal of Poetry. I choose it because his poem is the first that came in mind when asked the question. Maybe, it’s because I only recently read it?
**[https://shamsrumi.org/677/]</text>
      <sha1>q6jfq10wsultzlpxjflubwmz61piwz9</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309861</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964850</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:38:11Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ficaia</username>
        <id>3085955</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;'''[[w:Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo|Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo]]''' (c. 1450 – 1505) was a Castilian author who arranged the modern version of the chivalric romance [[w:Amadís de Gaula|''Amadís de Gaula'']], originally written in three books in the 14th century by an unknown author. Montalvo incorporated a fourth book in the original series, and followed it with a sequel, [[w:Las sergas de Esplandián|''Las sergas de Esplandián'']]. It is the sequel that Montalv...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3964850</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3751" sha1="lsyt8h5yxz0z9pz25bypj2r9pdnhmeh" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo|Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo]]''' (c. 1450 – 1505) was a Castilian author who arranged the modern version of the chivalric romance [[w:Amadís de Gaula|''Amadís de Gaula'']], originally written in three books in the 14th century by an unknown author. Montalvo incorporated a fourth book in the original series, and followed it with a sequel, [[w:Las sergas de Esplandián|''Las sergas de Esplandián'']]. It is the sequel that Montalvo is most often noted for, mainly because within the book he coined the word [[w:Etymology of California|''California'']].

== Quotes ==

[[File:California island Vinckeboons5.jpg|thumb|On the right hand of the Indies there is an island called California, very near to the Terrestrial Paradise.]]
[[File:Detail of Queen Califia in the &quot;California's Name&quot; mural (Lucile Lloyd, 1937) (cropped).gif|thumb|There reigned in this Island of California a queen, ... desirous to achieve great things; ... to see the world and its various races.]]

* Know that, on the right hand of the Indies, there is an island called California, very near to the Terrestrial Paradise, which was peopled with black women, without any men among them, because they were accustomed to live after the fashion of Amazons. They were of strong and hardened bodies, of ardent courage, and of great force. The island was the strongest in the world, from its steep rocks and great cliffs. Their arms were all of gold; and so were the caparisons of the wild beasts which they rode, after having tamed them: for in all the island there is no other metal. They lived in caves very well worked out; they had many ships, in which they sailed to other parts to carry on their forrays....{{pb}}In this island, called California, are many griffins, on account of the great savageness of the country, and the immense quantity of wild game to be found there...{{pb}}Now, in the time that those great men of the Pagans sailed [against Constantinople] with those great fleets of which I have told you, there reigned in this Island of California a queen, very large of body, very beautiful, in the prime of her years, desirous to achieve great things; strong, brave, eager, and of good courage, — more than any of those who had before this held her kingdom. And, hearing tell how the greater part of the world was moving against the Christians, not knowing what sort of thing the Christians were, and having no knowledge of other countries but those which were near her own; desiring to see the world and its various races; thinking that, with the great power which she and her people could bring, of all that they gained, she would, from her strength and rank, obtain the greater part, —  she talked with all those who were skilful in war, and told them that it would be well, if, embarking in their greatest fleets, they followed in the way in which so many great princes and lords were following. Animating and encouraging them, she set before them the great honors and inducements which such a course offered them above all, showing them how much more fame they would gain through all the world than if they remained in this island, where, doing only what their grandmothers did, they were only buried alive, — living like those who were dead; passing their days, without fame or glory, as the brute beasts do.
** ''Las sergas de Esplandián'' (1510), ch. 157: extracts translated by Edward E. Hale, &quot;The Name of California&quot;, ''Proceedings of the American Antiquarian Society'' (April 30, 1862), p. 48; revised in ''The Atlantic Monthly'' (March, 1864), p. 266

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Montalvo, Garci Rodríguez de}}

[[Category:1500s deaths]]
[[Category:Novelists from Spain]]</text>
      <sha1>lsyt8h5yxz0z9pz25bypj2r9pdnhmeh</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964851</id>
      <parentid>3964850</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:38:51Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ficaia</username>
        <id>3085955</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* Quotes */</comment>
      <origin>3964851</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3752" sha1="kv89nbfe9soyc66srowvv9knwbi9tx7" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo|Garci Rodríguez de Montalvo]]''' (c. 1450 – 1505) was a Castilian author who arranged the modern version of the chivalric romance [[w:Amadís de Gaula|''Amadís de Gaula'']], originally written in three books in the 14th century by an unknown author. Montalvo incorporated a fourth book in the original series, and followed it with a sequel, [[w:Las sergas de Esplandián|''Las sergas de Esplandián'']]. It is the sequel that Montalvo is most often noted for, mainly because within the book he coined the word [[w:Etymology of California|''California'']].

== Quotes ==

[[File:California island Vinckeboons5.jpg|thumb|On the right hand of the Indies there is an island called California, very near to the Terrestrial Paradise.]]
[[File:Detail of Queen Califia in the &quot;California's Name&quot; mural (Lucile Lloyd, 1937) (cropped).gif|thumb|There reigned in this Island of California a queen, ... desirous to achieve great things; ... to see the world and its various races.]]

* Know that, on the right hand of the Indies, there is an island called California, very near to the Terrestrial Paradise, which was peopled with black women, without any men among them, because they were accustomed to live after the fashion of Amazons. They were of strong and hardened bodies, of ardent courage, and of great force. The island was the strongest in the world, from its steep rocks and great cliffs. Their arms were all of gold; and so were the caparisons of the wild beasts which they rode, after having tamed them: for in all the island there is no other metal. They lived in caves very well worked out; they had many ships, in which they sailed to other parts to carry on their forrays....{{pb}}In this island, called California, are many griffins, on account of the great savageness of the country, and the immense quantity of wild game to be found there....{{pb}}Now, in the time that those great men of the Pagans sailed [against Constantinople] with those great fleets of which I have told you, there reigned in this Island of California a queen, very large of body, very beautiful, in the prime of her years, desirous to achieve great things; strong, brave, eager, and of good courage, — more than any of those who had before this held her kingdom. And, hearing tell how the greater part of the world was moving against the Christians, not knowing what sort of thing the Christians were, and having no knowledge of other countries but those which were near her own; desiring to see the world and its various races; thinking that, with the great power which she and her people could bring, of all that they gained, she would, from her strength and rank, obtain the greater part, —  she talked with all those who were skilful in war, and told them that it would be well, if, embarking in their greatest fleets, they followed in the way in which so many great princes and lords were following. Animating and encouraging them, she set before them the great honors and inducements which such a course offered them above all, showing them how much more fame they would gain through all the world than if they remained in this island, where, doing only what their grandmothers did, they were only buried alive, — living like those who were dead; passing their days, without fame or glory, as the brute beasts do.
** ''Las sergas de Esplandián'' (1510), ch. 157: extracts translated by Edward E. Hale, &quot;The Name of California&quot;, ''Proceedings of the American Antiquarian Society'' (April 30, 1862), p. 48; revised in ''The Atlantic Monthly'' (March, 1864), p. 266

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Montalvo, Garci Rodríguez de}}

[[Category:1500s deaths]]
[[Category:Novelists from Spain]]</text>
      <sha1>kv89nbfe9soyc66srowvv9knwbi9tx7</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Arnold Hague</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309862</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964853</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:39:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Suslindisambiguator</username>
        <id>275269</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>created page with 2 quotes from Arnold Hague &amp; 1 quote about him</comment>
      <origin>3964853</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4152" sha1="7zwj6dyovt0s8p5h9s1jyrlixhhje6p" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Arnold Hague}}''' (December 3, 1840 – May 14, 1917) was an American {{w|geologist}} and explorer, who did research in the {{w|western United States}}, [[Guatemala]], and northern [[China]]. Known for his role in investigating and promoting {{w|Yellowstone National Park}}, he was elected in 1885 to the U.S/ {{w|National Academy of Sciences}} and in 1903 to the {{w|American Philosophical Society}}. Hague served as the president of the {{w|Geological Society of America}} for a one-year term from 1910 to 1911. 

{{scientist-stub}}
==Quotes==
* Midway between the {{w|Sierra Nevada|Sierra}} and the {{w|Wasatch Range|Wasatch}} stand the {{w|East Humboldt Range|East Humboldt Mountains}}, the most prominent range in the {{w|Great Basin}}. They present, not only by reason of the greater number of rugged and commanding peaks, many of them attaining an elevation over 11,000 feet above sea level, but by their broad, massive proportions,  long, unbroken ridges, and Alpine character, the boldest uplift on the Nevada plateau. Next west from the Humboldt  occurs the {{w|Diamond Mountains (Nevada)|Diamond Range}}, followed by the {{w|Pinon Range|Piñon Range}}, with the broad {{w|Diamond Valley (Nevada)|Diamond Valley}} lying between them. Southward the southern extremities of these two ranges enter the {{w|Eureka County, Nevada|Eureka District}} and form a part of its mountainous region.
** {{cite book|title=Geology of the Eureka District, Nevada: With an Atlas|series=Volume 20 of Monographs of the United States Geological Survey|publisher=U.S. Government Printing Office|year=1892|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=dJAoAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA2 |pages=2–3}} (419 pages; Appendix A. Systematic lists of fossils of each geological horizon by {{w|Charles Dollittle Walcott}}; Appendix B. Microscopical petrography of the eruptive rocks by {{w|Joseph P. Iddings}})

* A tourist visiting all the prominent geyser basins, hot springs, {{w|Yellowstone Lake}}, and the {{w|Grand Canyon of the Yellowstone|Grand Canyon}} and {{w|Yellowstone Falls|Falls of the Yellowstone}}, is not likely to come upon any other rock than {{w|rhyolite}}, excepting, of course, deposits from the hot springs, unless he ascends {{w|Mount Washburn}}.
** {{cite book|title=Geological History of the Yellowstone National Park|publisher=U.S. Government Printing Office,|year=1920|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=700CAAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA7|page=7}} (22 pages; published on behalf of U.S. Geological Survey &amp; U.S. National Park Service)

==Quotes about Arnold Hague==
* In 1883 Hague was appointed Geologist in charge of the Survey of the Yellowstone National Park and vicinity, and began field-work in August of that year with a large party of assistants, including three assistant geologists—[https://www.asap.unimelb.edu.au/asa/stama/mail/msg00138.html W. H. Weed], G. M. Wright, and {{w|Joseph P. Iddings|J. P. Iddings}}—a physicist, {{w|William Hallock}}; a chemist, {{w|Frank Austin Gooch|F. A. Gooch}}, a professional photographer, {{w|William Henry Jackson|W. H. Jackson}}, and a disbursing clerk, C. D. Davis.
** {{w|Joseph P. Iddings}}, {{cite book|chapter=Biographical Memoir of Arnold Hague 1840-1917|title=Biographical Memoirs of the U.S. National Academy of Sciences|volume=IX|year=1919|chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=sqsAAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA32|pages=21–38}} (quote from p. 32)

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}
* [https://www.wyohistory.org/authors/john-clayton John Clayton], {{cite web|url=https://www.wyohistory.org/encyclopedia/yellowstone-park-arnold-hague-and-birth-national-forests|title=Yellowstone Park, Arnold Hague and the Birth of National Forests|website=Encyclopedia, WyoHistory.org|date=May 26, 2017}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Hague, Arnold}}
[[Category:1840 births]]
[[Category:1917 deaths]]
[[Category:Geologists from the United States]]
[[Category:Heidelberg University alumni]]
[[Category:Members of the American Philosophical Society]]
[[Category:Members of the United States National Academy of Sciences]]
[[Category:Scientists from Boston]]
[[Category:University of Göttingen alumni]]
[[Category:Yale University alumni]]</text>
      <sha1>7zwj6dyovt0s8p5h9s1jyrlixhhje6p</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Emmanuel Eni</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309863</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964854</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:39:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964854</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2351" sha1="jsi5e7y7a0ez9m221sovo5e8nwa124z" xml:space="preserve">'''Emmanuel Eni''' (born 1967), is a Nigerian-born artist and poet. He works in various mediums including painting, sculpture, and performance art.
==Quotes==
*I have united all aspects of art which I practise under my discovered “Contemporary Barock Art” which has poetry and philosophy as the meeting point in my skill and inspiration in sculpture, painting, installation art, performance and music.
*ENDSARS is a movement of dis-satisfied Nigerians.Until the government on Nigeria gives reasonable remedies to these demands there will be more intense agitation and civil strife. Endsars is also flames from the burning questions and which in some major quarters in Nigeria and their stringent call for restructuring of the nation.
*A country with a suppressed people cannot have a government that survives if suppression remains.It is best when the government makes brave moves to bring all bad eggs in government to justice by showing them the book. Nigerians want to see  punishment for looters and very many such scape-goats.
*Living and dying for motherland is a kind of mindset that an opportunistic agitating leader might mis-use. This is the bedrock of most reclusive like socialist and communistic governments. Democracy must be liberal and the citizens like their leaders must grow a liberal mindset of responsibly advancing the nation, without Kamikatze doctrines on both sides.
*Nigerian youths are more sensible than in the past. They have forfeited the unwittingly corrupt and vain nature of some the older generation and seem to be talking in a united tone and voice.
*No, I was never an Andrew, I just had and still have a lot of desire to carry my body as well and as far as my mind, doing all in my might to spread African civilisation to the world and learn more about the entire world and mankind.
*Thinking of it, it is rather where my work finds me at the particular time, as much as it keeps me pleasantly entangled, progressive and busy.
*Israel and Palestine wars and conflict is the key war example that can apply as example with many characteristics in common as in their wars. In my installation, the concrete visual presence of the colossal dynamite contraption wall is to confront the viewer and bring them face to face with happenings of the war, instead of the safe distance of the news from Television and radio.</text>
      <sha1>jsi5e7y7a0ez9m221sovo5e8nwa124z</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964856</id>
      <parentid>3964854</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:41:07Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964856</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2777" sha1="n1nncw1sb5kb0vl8oewi6d84hrr64hp" xml:space="preserve">'''Emmanuel Eni''' (born 1967), is a Nigerian-born artist and poet. He works in various mediums including painting, sculpture, and performance art.
==Quotes==
*I have united all aspects of art which I practise under my discovered “Contemporary Barock Art” which has poetry and philosophy as the meeting point in my skill and inspiration in sculpture, painting, installation art, performance and music.
*ENDSARS is a movement of dis-satisfied Nigerians.Until the government on Nigeria gives reasonable remedies to these demands there will be more intense agitation and civil strife. Endsars is also flames from the burning questions and which in some major quarters in Nigeria and their stringent call for restructuring of the nation.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*A country with a suppressed people cannot have a government that survives if suppression remains.It is best when the government makes brave moves to bring all bad eggs in government to justice by showing them the book. Nigerians want to see  punishment for looters and very many such scape-goats.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Living and dying for motherland is a kind of mindset that an opportunistic agitating leader might mis-use. This is the bedrock of most reclusive like socialist and communistic governments. Democracy must be liberal and the citizens like their leaders must grow a liberal mindset of responsibly advancing the nation, without Kamikatze doctrines on both sides.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Nigerian youths are more sensible than in the past. They have forfeited the unwittingly corrupt and vain nature of some the older generation and seem to be talking in a united tone and voice.
*No, I was never an Andrew, I just had and still have a lot of desire to carry my body as well and as far as my mind, doing all in my might to spread African civilisation to the world and learn more about the entire world and mankind.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Thinking of it, it is rather where my work finds me at the particular time, as much as it keeps me pleasantly entangled, progressive and busy.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Israel and Palestine wars and conflict is the key war example that can apply as example with many characteristics in common as in their wars. In my installation, the concrete visual presence of the colossal dynamite contraption wall is to confront the viewer and bring them face to face with happenings of the war, instead of the safe distance of the news from Television and radio.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]</text>
      <sha1>n1nncw1sb5kb0vl8oewi6d84hrr64hp</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964857</id>
      <parentid>3964856</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:41:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964857</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2848" sha1="l6xlcjljk9vcje06fu8lyuzfpuca07z" xml:space="preserve">'''Emmanuel Eni''' (born 1967), is a Nigerian-born artist and poet. He works in various mediums including painting, sculpture, and performance art.
==Quotes==
*I have united all aspects of art which I practise under my discovered “Contemporary Barock Art” which has poetry and philosophy as the meeting point in my skill and inspiration in sculpture, painting, installation art, performance and music.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*ENDSARS is a movement of dis-satisfied Nigerians.Until the government on Nigeria gives reasonable remedies to these demands there will be more intense agitation and civil strife. Endsars is also flames from the burning questions and which in some major quarters in Nigeria and their stringent call for restructuring of the nation.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*A country with a suppressed people cannot have a government that survives if suppression remains.It is best when the government makes brave moves to bring all bad eggs in government to justice by showing them the book. Nigerians want to see  punishment for looters and very many such scape-goats.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Living and dying for motherland is a kind of mindset that an opportunistic agitating leader might mis-use. This is the bedrock of most reclusive like socialist and communistic governments. Democracy must be liberal and the citizens like their leaders must grow a liberal mindset of responsibly advancing the nation, without Kamikatze doctrines on both sides.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Nigerian youths are more sensible than in the past. They have forfeited the unwittingly corrupt and vain nature of some the older generation and seem to be talking in a united tone and voice.
*No, I was never an Andrew, I just had and still have a lot of desire to carry my body as well and as far as my mind, doing all in my might to spread African civilisation to the world and learn more about the entire world and mankind.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Thinking of it, it is rather where my work finds me at the particular time, as much as it keeps me pleasantly entangled, progressive and busy.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]
*Israel and Palestine wars and conflict is the key war example that can apply as example with many characteristics in common as in their wars. In my installation, the concrete visual presence of the colossal dynamite contraption wall is to confront the viewer and bring them face to face with happenings of the war, instead of the safe distance of the news from Television and radio.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/behold-blackman-in-european-kitchen/]</text>
      <sha1>l6xlcjljk9vcje06fu8lyuzfpuca07z</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sakiena Frenchman</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309864</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964858</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:48:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964858</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1963" sha1="46i8yfjic9tu2enn15pze21g4p2hwr3" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Sakiena Frenchman}}''' (born 17 September 1974) is a South African politician and community activist who has been a Member of the National Assembly of South Africa since 2024, representing the National Coloured Congress, of which she serves as secretary-general.
== Quotes ==
*We are gravely concerned that this arrest, its merits and the events surrounding the actions of the SAPS task team, namely the Political Killing Task Team (PKTT) and their contingent of state prosecutors used to action their investigations, are fraught with intentional errors that contravene many national government laws and most importantly the Constitution of the Republic of South Africa
**[https://iol.co.za/news/south-africa/2026-05-11-ncc-leadership-comes-to-defence-of-its-arrested-leader-fadiel-adams/]
*Now, under the Correctional Services Act and the Standing Rules of Parliament, members of the relevant portfolio committees have the right to visit Correctional Centres and interview inmates as part of their oversight work. This makes the meeting itself legally sanctioned in terms of law,
**[https://iol.co.za/news/south-africa/2026-05-11-ncc-leadership-comes-to-defence-of-its-arrested-leader-fadiel-adams/]
*These actions remind us of the apartheid years that were thought to be behind us. We in no way seek special treatment in terms of the law for Adams, but request reasonableness, justice and fairness.
**[https://iol.co.za/news/south-africa/2026-05-11-ncc-leadership-comes-to-defence-of-its-arrested-leader-fadiel-adams/]
*However, in the South African Courts, specifically in cases like the Democratic Alliance vs Speaker of the National Assembly, have been very clear, the Executive, which is SAPS, cannot interfere with Legislative MPs in the performance of their duties
**[https://iol.co.za/news/south-africa/2026-05-11-ncc-leadership-comes-to-defence-of-its-arrested-leader-fadiel-adams/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>46i8yfjic9tu2enn15pze21g4p2hwr3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wikiquote:Votes for deletion/Ida Wyman</title>
    <ns>4</ns>
    <id>309866</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964862</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:53:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>VfD: Ida Wyman</comment>
      <origin>3964862</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="193" sha1="2f49lqedqjssua3tdihyzg281lulxzt" xml:space="preserve">== [[:Ida Wyman]] ==
no quotes, copy of wikipedia — [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 12:53, 14 July 2026 (UTC)
&lt;small&gt;'''Vote closes''': 13:00, 21 July 2026 (UTC)&lt;/small&gt;</text>
      <sha1>2f49lqedqjssua3tdihyzg281lulxzt</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964863</id>
      <parentid>3964862</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:53:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Adding nominator vote</comment>
      <origin>3964863</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="301" sha1="lprqp23whvdzzmprdonwh6zsuqo8le1" xml:space="preserve">== [[:Ida Wyman]] ==
no quotes, copy of wikipedia — [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 12:53, 14 July 2026 (UTC)
: '''Delete''' as nominator [[User:GrimRob|GrimRob]] ([[User talk:GrimRob|talk]]) 12:53, 14 July 2026 (UTC)
&lt;small&gt;'''Vote closes''': 13:00, 21 July 2026 (UTC)&lt;/small&gt;</text>
      <sha1>lprqp23whvdzzmprdonwh6zsuqo8le1</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Hauwa shaffer nuri</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309867</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964866</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:54:40Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Confidence24</username>
        <id>3337269</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964866</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2289" sha1="1xxyol5mog6t29kt07vfr7gz9xonh3s" xml:space="preserve">'''Hauwa Shaffii Nuhu''' is a poet and essayist from [[Nigeria]], whose work has appeared on Popula, Ake Review, Lolwe, Arts and Africa, After The Pause journal, Bitter Oleander, 20.35 Africa, Memento, and elsewhere. She is a 2018 fellow of Ebedi Writers Residency and a two-time shortlistee of the [[Nigerian]] Students Poetry Prize. She has an LLB from Bayero [[University]], Kano State.

==Quotes==
*&quot;Poetry has afforded me the language to translate moments personally lived and magic into words. Because in it, I have realized that no emotion no matter how intense is solitary, no human condition no matter how peculiar, is not shared.&quot;
**[https://poetsinnigeria.org.ng/index.php/my-capacity-to-feel-is-a-product-of-poetry-hauwa-shaffii-nuhu-pin-literary-interviews/]

*&quot;My capacity to feel — is a product of poetry; I am a product of poetry.&quot;
**[https://poetsinnigeria.org.ng/index.php/my-capacity-to-feel-is-a-product-of-poetry-hauwa-shaffii-nuhu-pin-literary-interviews/]

*&quot;I’m not sure my memory serves me well at this moment. But it could very well be a poem of 99 lines which I wrote for a boy. I was 15 and completely sure I was in love. So, I expressed it in the way that came closest to me. It was hilarious, in retrospect. I never even showed it to him. It was my personal thing. I took the poem around for years but I have now lost it.&quot;
**[https://poetsinnigeria.org.ng/index.php/my-capacity-to-feel-is-a-product-of-poetry-hauwa-shaffii-nuhu-pin-literary-interviews/]

*As every writer will tell you, the greatest sharpener of the gift of writing is reading. But at the time, I didn’t know this. I was subconsciously improving both my spoken and written language. When you meet someone who reads widely, it reflects in how well they speak. 
**[https://blueprint.ng/pain-drove-me-to-poetry-but-love-kept-me-hauwa-shafii-nuhu/]

*The only difference I think, between myself and my friends who read during my primary school days was that while they read for entertainment, I read to satisfy a certain hunger. 
**[https://blueprint.ng/pain-drove-me-to-poetry-but-love-kept-me-hauwa-shafii-nuhu/]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Nuhu, Hauwa Shaffii }}
[[Category:Academics from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Novelists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Essayists from Nigeria]]
[[Category:Literary critics]]</text>
      <sha1>1xxyol5mog6t29kt07vfr7gz9xonh3s</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Nqabisa Gantsho</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309868</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964870</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T12:57:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964870</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1826" sha1="sfye39h58jsknbbnk1im38d0scf74xu" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Nqabisa Gantsho}}''' is a South African politician from the Eastern Cape who has served as a Member of the National Assembly of South Africa since 2019, representing the African National Congress.

== Quotes ==
*We are committed to conducting regular oversight visits to assess the department’s projects and programmes. By working together as a team, we can ensure that our oversight efforts are comprehensive and impactful,”
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-committee-forestry-fisheries-and-environment-commits-enhance-oversight-and-community-engagement]
*We will prioritise oversight visits in consultation with relevant offices in Parliament to ensure that the department delivers on its mandate, communities receive services and that development is inclusive and sustainable
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-committee-forestry-fisheries-and-environment-commits-enhance-oversight-and-community-engagement]
*“This workshop has equipped us with a deeper understanding of the department’s work and the support we can expect from various parliamentary departments
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-committee-forestry-fisheries-and-environment-commits-enhance-oversight-and-community-engagement]
*The committee recognised the urgent need to address issues such as poverty, unemployment, climate disasters, pollution, and the transition to a circular economy. A key focus will be on raising awareness about climate change and a just transition, empowering communities to adapt and build resilience
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-committee-forestry-fisheries-and-environment-commits-enhance-oversight-and-community-engagement]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>sfye39h58jsknbbnk1im38d0scf74xu</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>User:03isrflo62410/common.js</title>
    <ns>2</ns>
    <id>309869</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964876</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:03:11Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;// VfD Tool - [[User:PieWriter/vfd.js]] mw.loader.load('//en.wikiquote.org/w/index.php?title=User:PieWriter/vfd.js&amp;action=raw&amp;ctype=text/javascript');&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3964876</origin>
      <model>javascript</model>
      <format>text/javascript</format>
      <text bytes="150" sha1="pxe5gi2l7xra5y6gpbvwmcjg6y3qgr2" xml:space="preserve">// VfD Tool - [[User:PieWriter/vfd.js]]
mw.loader.load('//en.wikiquote.org/w/index.php?title=User:PieWriter/vfd.js&amp;action=raw&amp;ctype=text/javascript');</text>
      <sha1>pxe5gi2l7xra5y6gpbvwmcjg6y3qgr2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Fatima Chohan</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309870</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964884</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:14:42Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3964884</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="369" sha1="ih9pqm5ob6wl3wnbauso1eh6lvi704d" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Fatima Ismail Chohan|Fatima Ismail Chohan]]''' (formerly known as Fatima Chohan-Kota) is a South African politician and activist who is currently deputy chair of the South African Human Rights Commission.[3] A member of the African National Congress (ANC), Chohan was formerly a member of the National Assembly of South Africa, where she served from 1996 to 2019</text>
      <sha1>ih9pqm5ob6wl3wnbauso1eh6lvi704d</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964902</id>
      <parentid>3964884</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:39:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3964902</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="596" sha1="6l88dnadhtf89p7n4n1y38kg6iwov20" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Fatima Ismail Chohan|Fatima Ismail Chohan]]''' (formerly known as Fatima Chohan-Kota) is a South African politician and activist who is currently deputy chair of the South African Human Rights Commission.[3] A member of the African National Congress (ANC), Chohan was formerly a member of the National Assembly of South Africa, where she served from 1996 to 2019

== Quotes ==
*Economic asylum seeker
**[https://www.gov.za/news/speeches/address-fatima-chohan-deputy-minister-home-affairs-republic-south-africa-occasion] Fatima made this quote during her speech at an ingural conference.

*</text>
      <sha1>6l88dnadhtf89p7n4n1y38kg6iwov20</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Annah Gela</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309871</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964891</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:26:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964891</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2768" sha1="s7c13fkrinu8levn00fthdj2q5ai84m" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Annah Gela}}''' is a South African politician of the African National Congress (ANC) who had been a Member of the National Assembly of South Africa from 2019 until 2024.

== Quotes ==
*The inputs received, for and against the Bill, will assist members when they deliberate and decide on the Bill. We remain grateful for the input, both oral and written and recommit to giving them due consideration. The public hearings in the Eastern Cape and throughout the country have been a true testament of democracy in action,”
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-east-london-residents-concerned-about-enforcement-tobacco-bill-and-impact-businesses]
*Despite contrasting views on the Bill, participants agreed that the enforcement of the regulations remains a challenge that needs to be reevaluated. Some participants against the Bill argued that the South African Police Service is overburdened by the high crime rate, which will make this Bill impossible to enforce. Business owners also argued that compliance with smoke-free zones will be difficult to monitor and might harm their businesses. Those supporting the Bill called for enhanced monitoring and enforcement mechanisms to prevent the sale of tobacco products to children.
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-east-london-residents-concerned-about-enforcement-tobacco-bill-and-impact-businesses]
*regulations for tobacco and electronic delivery systems to highlight that electronic delivery systems are less harmful than combustible cigarettes and provide an alternative toward the achievement of the goal of reducing consumption of tobacco products. Some participants referred to the success of the differentiated and evidence-based approach in other countries and argued that South Africa should adopt this approach.
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-east-london-residents-concerned-about-enforcement-tobacco-bill-and-impact-businesses]
*Meanwhile, supporters of the Bill argued that the health and wellbeing of South Africans should supersede the need for profit. Parents highlighted their concerns about the increasing inclination to smoke among the youth. They argued that the implementation of this Bill will protect the most vulnerable, including children, non-smokers and pregnant women against dangers posed by second hand smoke inhalation. While some participants supported the Bill, there was an argument that small-scale traders must be protected to ensure the sustainability of their businesses.
**[https://www.parliament.gov.za/press-releases/media-statement-east-london-residents-concerned-about-enforcement-tobacco-bill-and-impact-businesses]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>s7c13fkrinu8levn00fthdj2q5ai84m</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Nomalungelo Gina</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309872</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964897</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:35:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964897</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1879" sha1="pr3aek8tlakbk3wd992zra3hsecryoh" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Nomalungelo Gina}}''' (born 25 October 1969) is a South African politician from KwaZulu-Natal who is currently serving as the Deputy Minister of Science, Technology and Innovation since June 2024. She has represented the African National Congress in the National Assembly since May 2009

== Quotes ==
*Today marks a significant milestone in advancing science, technology and innovation in South Africa, and I think it is appropriate that I start by outlining some of the factors that informed our decision to transition from National Science Week to National Science Month.
**[https://m.polity.org.za/article/sa-keynote-address-by-the-deputy-minister-of-science-technology-and-innovation-dr-nomalungelo-gina-at-the-launch-of-the-inaugural-national-science-month-vaal-university-of-technology-04072026-2026-07-06]
*However, because science, technology and innovation are increasingly central to addressing the complex challenges facing our world today, we believe South Africa needs a broader and more sustained science engagement programme.
**[https://m.polity.org.za/article/sa-keynote-address-by-the-deputy-minister-of-science-technology-and-innovation-dr-nomalungelo-gina-at-the-launch-of-the-inaugural-national-science-month-vaal-university-of-technology-04072026-2026-07-06]
*As some of you may know, since 2000, our department has implemented National Science Week (NSW) as the country’s premier science engagement programme. Over more than two decades, National Science Week has made important progress in advancing our country’s Science Engagement Strategy.
**[https://m.polity.org.za/article/sa-keynote-address-by-the-deputy-minister-of-science-technology-and-innovation-dr-nomalungelo-gina-at-the-launch-of-the-inaugural-national-science-month-vaal-university-of-technology-04072026-2026-07-06]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>pr3aek8tlakbk3wd992zra3hsecryoh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Stephen Adewale</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309873</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964924</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T13:59:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3964924</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1609" sha1="2ieeuhp4eo1cngm3am3lg12vkjtabs4" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Stephen Adewale|Stephen Adewale]]''' is a Nigerian journalist, broadcaster, author, and politician from Akure, Ondo State. He is known for his work in journalism, particularly with KAFTAN TV, and for his involvement in Nigerian politics through the Social Democratic Party (SDP).

== Quotes ==
*My growing days were challenge-filled.
**[https://tribuneonlineng.com/my-growing-days-were-challenge-filled-mr-stephen-adewale-ondo-sdp-chairman/ Stephen said this at an interview]

*if you cannot win them, you join them.
**[https://tribuneonlineng.com/my-growing-days-were-challenge-filled-mr-stephen-adewale-ondo-sdp-chairman/ Stephen said this at an interview]

*A man whose intellectual sagacity had only been whispered to him in passing by his journalist friends, yet he deemed himself qualified to pass a grand verdict
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*Criticism, when wielded with sincerity, serves as a scalpel, precise, constructive, and capable of refining its subject.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*Nigeria is not merely in need of critics; it is in need of honest critics. It is in need of voices that challenge, correct, and inspire, not those who merely regurgitate the cynicism that has already poisoned our media space.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*</text>
      <sha1>2ieeuhp4eo1cngm3am3lg12vkjtabs4</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964927</id>
      <parentid>3964924</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:02:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I added quotes and references</comment>
      <origin>3964927</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2084" sha1="n41p4ga3lep1aigotd7ecmcxi4nflgp" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Stephen Adewale|Stephen Adewale]]''' is a Nigerian journalist, broadcaster, author, and politician from Akure, Ondo State. He is known for his work in journalism, particularly with KAFTAN TV, and for his involvement in Nigerian politics through the Social Democratic Party (SDP).

== Quotes ==
*My growing days were challenge-filled.
**[https://tribuneonlineng.com/my-growing-days-were-challenge-filled-mr-stephen-adewale-ondo-sdp-chairman/ Stephen said this at an interview]

*if you cannot win them, you join them.
**[https://tribuneonlineng.com/my-growing-days-were-challenge-filled-mr-stephen-adewale-ondo-sdp-chairman/ Stephen said this at an interview]

*A man whose intellectual sagacity had only been whispered to him in passing by his journalist friends, yet he deemed himself qualified to pass a grand verdict
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*Criticism, when wielded with sincerity, serves as a scalpel, precise, constructive, and capable of refining its subject.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*Nigeria is not merely in need of critics; it is in need of honest critics. It is in need of voices that challenge, correct, and inspire, not those who merely regurgitate the cynicism that has already poisoned our media space.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*But when used recklessly, it becomes a sledgehammer, destructive, indiscriminate, and serving no purpose beyond ruin.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/]

*At a time when Nigeria teeters on the edge of existential crises, what we need are voices that challenge, correct, and inspire.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/]</text>
      <sha1>n41p4ga3lep1aigotd7ecmcxi4nflgp</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964943</id>
      <parentid>3964927</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:08:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I added categories</comment>
      <origin>3964943</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2229" sha1="1ub55wbmm8wjv0p48a2dwzbckcaqk8v" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Stephen Adewale|Stephen Adewale]]''' is a Nigerian journalist, broadcaster, author, and politician from Akure, [[wikipedia:Ondo_State|Ondo state]].  He is known for his work in journalism, particularly with KAFTAN TV, and for his involvement in [[Nigeria|Nigerian]] politics through the Social Democratic Party (SDP).

== Quotes ==
*My growing days were challenge-filled.
**[https://tribuneonlineng.com/my-growing-days-were-challenge-filled-mr-stephen-adewale-ondo-sdp-chairman/ Stephen said this at an interview]

*if you cannot win them, you join them.
**[https://tribuneonlineng.com/my-growing-days-were-challenge-filled-mr-stephen-adewale-ondo-sdp-chairman/ Stephen said this at an interview]

*A man whose intellectual sagacity had only been whispered to him in passing by his journalist friends, yet he deemed himself qualified to pass a grand verdict
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*Criticism, when wielded with sincerity, serves as a scalpel, precise, constructive, and capable of refining its subject.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*Nigeria is not merely in need of critics; it is in need of honest critics. It is in need of voices that challenge, correct, and inspire, not those who merely regurgitate the cynicism that has already poisoned our media space.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/ Adewale said during a speech]

*But when used recklessly, it becomes a sledgehammer, destructive, indiscriminate, and serving no purpose beyond ruin.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/]

*At a time when Nigeria teeters on the edge of existential crises, what we need are voices that challenge, correct, and inspire.
**[https://independent.ng/alleged-attack-on-sdp-presidential-candidate-oau-lecturer-differs-from-festus-adedayo/]


== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Politicians]]
[[Category:Men]]</text>
      <sha1>1ub55wbmm8wjv0p48a2dwzbckcaqk8v</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mimmy Gondwe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309874</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964925</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:00:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964925</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2143" sha1="2rkf5wavf5hdvb6h9k0rpyevr1sll2d" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Mimmy Gondwe}}''' (born 7 February 1977) is a South African politician who has been a Member of the National Assembly of South Africa since 2019. She served as the Deputy Minister of Higher Education from 2024 until 2026. A member of the Democratic Alliance, Gondwe was Shadow Deputy Minister of State Security from 2019 to 2020, the Shadow Deputy Minister of Public Service and Administration between 2020 and 2023, and the Shadow Minister of Public Enterprises from 2023 until 2024.

== Quotes ==
*Honestly, I do not have a lengthy political background. My first experience in the political field came through being employed by Parliament as a Researcher and Content Advisor for one of the Select Committees in the National Council of Provinces. During my employment at Parliament, I occupied the roles of Parliamentary Researcher and Content Advisor, both of which required I play a non-partisan role. The roles required me to provide research and content related support to the various MPs that sat on my Committee. I made it a point to stay clear of any direct political involvement. As suc
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/dr-mimmy-martha-gondwe]
*As an MP, your job is to ensure that you articulate the concerns and needs of the people you represent at a national level. You also make laws, enable public participation, and ensure that members of the public can participate in the parliamentary processes. Additionally, a main yet little known role of an MP is to talk about and advance human rights. As an MP, you must fight to ensure that the rights of citizens are protected, rights such as the right to life and right to access socio-economic opportunities.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/dr-mimmy-martha-gondwe]
*I continually acknowledge that God is all-knowing and all-seeing and we are just human beings. We are just the instruments in His hands and He uses us for his purpose. I applied to become an MP, and the application process was rigorous. The processes included written, online and oral assessments.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/dr-mimmy-martha-gondwe]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>2rkf5wavf5hdvb6h9k0rpyevr1sll2d</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Ben Sharpsteen</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309875</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964944</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:08:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Films by director|Sharpsteen, Ben]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3964944</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="46" sha1="886u8pn0amx4jwxidpgqoplm0jv73ma" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Sharpsteen, Ben]]</text>
      <sha1>886u8pn0amx4jwxidpgqoplm0jv73ma</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Dorothea Gopie</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309876</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964947</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:12:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964947</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2655" sha1="kzo2eezod6d1f7c8uh956zvvhgmbtpj" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Dorothea Gopie}}''' is a South African politician. She served as a Member of the Western Cape Provincial Parliament from May 2014 to May 2019. Gopie is a member of the African National Congress.

== Quotes ==
*They are the people that are to be blamed and they are wrong. And during this time they are supposed to be working together to get to a solution, not blaming a group, a minority group of people, and an elderly man. During this time even, the month of July, we in South Africa are celebrating the month of Madiba. And Mr Lee is equal to Madiba because he is an elderly man that has put his time aside to help other people. Instead of being given the help that he needs, he gets the blame. I think that is so wrong of them. I think they know they are in the wrong and they don’t have an answer to give to the people.”
**[https://established.co.za/south-korean-government-remains-silent-regarding-covid-19-human-rights-violations-despite-international-outcry/]
*When the outbreak happened, they were supposed to close (the borders). It is what was done here in South Africa. When it started, the first people that were affected, our government called for level five and shut down, and no flights out and no visiting other countries and so on, because our government cared about the citizens and not about trading and money-making. That is what was expected from the South Korean government, to care about the citizens and not caring about making money and advertising and trading. So, they are to blame.”
**[https://established.co.za/south-korean-government-remains-silent-regarding-covid-19-human-rights-violations-despite-international-outcry/]
*As a religious leader and the chairperson of the religious body, I want to say that Mr Lee has our prayers as religious leaders and we want to thank him, as an elderly man that has taken the time and care for other people while he could have just thought about himself and been selfish. But he thought about the citizens and not about himself. And he also went so far as reaching out to other countries in order to help South Korea. So, at this moment, he is being given the blame but we are praying for him because we know that he meant good and we are taking him as the image of Madiba because Madiba has spent his life in jail for other people, not for himself, not thinking about his wife and his kids but thinking about the nation and that is what Mr Lee is doing at the moment
**[https://established.co.za/south-korean-government-remains-silent-regarding-covid-19-human-rights-violations-despite-international-outcry/]
== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>kzo2eezod6d1f7c8uh956zvvhgmbtpj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Lou Adler</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309877</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964948</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:12:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Films by director|Alder, Lou]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3964948</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="41" sha1="3uc4m5udu0tj7zgk4rwr3oxh76pr40p" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Alder, Lou]]</text>
      <sha1>3uc4m5udu0tj7zgk4rwr3oxh76pr40p</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Tommy Chong</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309878</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964950</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:14:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Films by director|Chong, Tommy]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3964950</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="43" sha1="bysgw18gz1yhirwnpj2ovntahw2ehls" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Chong, Tommy]]</text>
      <sha1>bysgw18gz1yhirwnpj2ovntahw2ehls</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Jonathan Mostow</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309879</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964953</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:18:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Films by director|Mostow, Jonathan]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3964953</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="47" sha1="ipziib00n0hmekt93mmg2hb2ft9usyg" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Mostow, Jonathan]]</text>
      <sha1>ipziib00n0hmekt93mmg2hb2ft9usyg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Tandeka Gqada</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309880</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964968</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:39:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964968</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2774" sha1="2ozkrkqftbo28au7ot6l76sy5d50p8a" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Tandeka Gqada}}''' is a South African businesswoman, politician and a councillor for the Democratic Alliance in the City of Cape Town since November 2021. Gqada had previously served as a DA councillor in the City of Cape Town where she was an Executive Member of the Mayoral Committee. She is a former Member of Parliament for the DA (2014–2019). She served as the Shadow Deputy Minister of Human Settlements from 2014 to 2017 and as the Shadow Deputy Minister of Energy from 2017 to 2019.

== Quotes ==
*My political interest started in 2010 when I watched the debates in Parliament and I was still in the private sector at the time. I then came across Mr Masizole Mnqasela, a Member of the Western Cape Provincial Legislature at an opening of a Nedbank branch where he was a speaker and he spoke very impressively. I approached him after his speech where he elaborated about the DA as an organisation for everyone and I asked him about membership. He then started sending me all relevant documentation which then grew my interest further in the DA as a political party. He also advised that I attend constituency meetings in Khayelitsha on Mondays where the people where quite welcoming. Because the DA has an open opportunity ethos, positions for proportional representative (PR) councillors were advertised.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/ms-tandeka-gqada-da]
*In 2011 I applied through the processes of the Electoral College where one gets interviewed by at least 50 people who have to rate you on your performance in the interview. If you succeed at that stage you go to the selection panel which also interviews you and you also get assessed. After that rankings are made according to seat targets on the list of potential councillors and I had been drawn at position 21 in the 2011 local government elections. We worked very hard on the campaign trail in Khayelitsha and I quit my job when I became a DA PR councillor. When we came to the City of Cape Town Metro during the induction of councillors, I was interviewed again by the Executive Mayor, Patricia De Lille and three others on her panel for her Mayoral Committee (MAYCO). I then succeeded and was a MAYCO member from 2011 until 2014 when I was deployed to Parliament.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/ms-tandeka-gqada-da]
*Mondays are constituency days and on Tuesdays I am at the Human Settlements Portfolio Committee. On Wednesdays I do parliamentary administration and sometimes I attend study groups with the city, the province and national representatives of the sector within the DA. On Thursday mornings we have caucus until lunch time and on Fridays I return to my constituency.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/ms-tandeka-gqada-da]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>2ozkrkqftbo28au7ot6l76sy5d50p8a</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Akinwumi Isola</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309881</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964971</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:51:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964971</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1412" sha1="0wkncjjz6uf6l848fd5ubgb8r2l3cg5" xml:space="preserve">'''Akinwunmi Isola''' (24 December 1939 – 17 February 2018) was a Nigerian playwright, novelist, actor, scholar and champion of the Yoruba language.

== Quotes ==

* &quot;I will never rest until Yoruba language and culture are put in their rightful position.&quot;
** [https://thenewsnigeria.com.ng/2018/02/18/akinwumi-isolas-last-interview-with-thenews-we-must-preserve-our-language-to-retain-our-culture/ Speaking on the preservation of Yoruba language and culture]

* &quot;Nigerians shouldn't forget their languages.&quot;
** [https://thenewsnigeria.com.ng/2018/02/18/akinwumi-isolas-last-interview-with-thenews-we-must-preserve-our-language-to-retain-our-culture/ On the importance of indigenous languages]

* &quot;Languages die when they are not spoken, but if you keep speaking a language you will promote the values of the language.&quot;
** [https://thenewsnigeria.com.ng/2018/02/18/akinwumi-isolas-last-interview-with-thenews-we-must-preserve-our-language-to-retain-our-culture/ Speaking on language preservation]

* &quot;Our politicians are not serving the nation the way they should.&quot;
** [https://thenewsnigeria.com.ng/2018/02/18/akinwumi-isolas-last-interview-with-thenews-we-must-preserve-our-language-to-retain-our-culture/ Reflecting on political leadership in Nigeria]

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Isola, Akinwunmi}}

[[Category:1939 births]]
[[Category:2018 deaths]]
[[Category:Nigerian playwrights]]</text>
      <sha1>0wkncjjz6uf6l848fd5ubgb8r2l3cg5</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Samantha Graham-Maré</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309882</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964972</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T14:52:26Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964972</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1744" sha1="pq2zcoi08ikt4pua4ylktho7bgpi18w" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Samantha Graham-Maré}}''' (born 27 May 1969) is a South African politician from the Eastern Cape who was elected to the National Assembly of South Africa in the 2019 general election and re-elected in the 2024 general election as a member of the Democratic Alliance. Graham-Maré was the Deputy Minister of Electricity and Energy from 2024 until 2026. Graham-Maré served as the shadow deputy minister of public works and infrastructure from 2019 to 2020 and as the shadow minister for the portfolio between 2020 and 2023, when she was named shadow minister of electricity. She is a former councillor of the Dr Beyers Naudé Local Municipality.

== Quotes ==
*This is a massive opportunity as SAREM provides a predictable pipeline of investment in the renewable energy space
**[https://www.thesouthafrican.com/business/we-will-create-more-jobs-in-the-renewable-energy-space-says-electricity-deputy-minister/]
*The way that the electricity department would create jobs would be via the South African Renewable Energy Masterplan (SAREM). This is an industrial development plan for the renewable energy and storage value chains by 2030.
**[https://www.thesouthafrican.com/business/we-will-create-more-jobs-in-the-renewable-energy-space-says-electricity-deputy-minister/]
*South African job creation has a high priority given that South Africa has the highest unemployment rate among G20 countries. Statistics South Africa said that the official unemployment rate rose to 32.7% in the first quarter 2026 from 31.4% in the fourth quarter 2025.
**[https://www.thesouthafrican.com/business/we-will-create-more-jobs-in-the-renewable-energy-space-says-electricity-deputy-minister/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>pq2zcoi08ikt4pua4ylktho7bgpi18w</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Zandile Gumede</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309883</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964977</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:14:57Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964977</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1661" sha1="k6egojvlpd5yxjk0mc4jaev2ttt1f21" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Zandile Gumede}}''' (born 12 May 1961) is a South African politician who has been serving as a Member of the KwaZulu-Natal Provincial Legislature since 2020. She served as the Executive Mayor of the eThekwini Metropolitan Municipality from 2016 until 2019. Gumede is a member of the African National Congress. And the current Chair Person of the African National Congress (ANC) at EThekwini Region.

== Quotes ==
*I have never had interest in joining the MK party; maybe the people in the MK party wish for me to join. Even if I wanted to go to the MK party, I would have gone by the time it was announced as a political party
**[https://mg.co.za/politics/2025-03-20-zandile-gumede-denies-plans-to-join-zuma-s-mk-party-but-leaves-door-open/]
*I am not saying I won’t ever go, but what I’m saying is that for now, I have never said I want to go. There are some things you must never swear that you’ll never do. For now, I’m the chair of the ANC in eThekwini until my term ends, then whoever takes on from there takes on and then that’s it.”
**[https://mg.co.za/politics/2025-03-20-zandile-gumede-denies-plans-to-join-zuma-s-mk-party-but-leaves-door-open/]
*If she does come, we would be so happy to receive her. We have approached so many comrades that we have worked with. Mam Gumede is one of those comrades we have worked with, she has shown leadership and a character of freeing a black person,” he said, adding that the ANC no longer had strong leadership. 
**[https://mg.co.za/politics/2025-03-20-zandile-gumede-denies-plans-to-join-zuma-s-mk-party-but-leaves-door-open/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>k6egojvlpd5yxjk0mc4jaev2ttt1f21</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Siviwe Gwarube</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309884</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964979</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:18:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964979</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2508" sha1="gbameftj2p440k1ydcyhttp70wf8t7w" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Siviwe Gwarube}}''' (born 14 July 1989) is a South African politician who is currently serving as Minister of Basic Education in the Government of National Unity (GNU) since July 2024. A member of the Democratic Alliance (DA), she has been a deputy federal chairperson of the party since April 2026. She was the Chief Whip of the Official Opposition between August 2022 and June 2024. She joined the National Assembly of South Africa in the May 2019 general election.

== Quotes ==
*My upbringing is a very simple one. I was born KwaMgingi, a small village outside of King Williams Town in the Eastern Cape. I lived there until I was 18 with my maternal grandmother who raised me and is still alive today.
**[https://mbewu.wordpress.com/2017/09/29/interview-with-siviwe-gwarube-executive-director-of-communications-at-the-democratic-alliance/]
*I come from a household situation that is quite common in South Africa, where the parents have a child at a young age and they leave you to be raised by grandparents. I also had the experience that many young black South Africans have, where I resided in the village, and went to school away from where they lived. School was a whole different reality from where I was coming from and I would commute every day to school. Therefore, there was a duality in the way I lived. Which is not unique as it’s product of where we come from as a country, where people want to send their children away to have a better life and a future. But I had a very simple, very typical village life in hindsight.
**[https://mbewu.wordpress.com/2017/09/29/interview-with-siviwe-gwarube-executive-director-of-communications-at-the-democratic-alliance/]
*My greatest influence is my grandmother, a woman who was born before her time as she decided not to get married, she wanted to self-actualise and have a life of her own. She didn’t feel as though she needed a husband to get the most out of life, which was atypical at the time. This didn’t put her in good standing with her family, her father didn’t understand. When she fell pregnant, she went against the grain and she didn’t feel compelled to marry the baby’s father. She also owned a few businesses and was a teacher for a few years and in her late 50s she went back to school to obtain a BA in Linguistics.
**[https://mbewu.wordpress.com/2017/09/29/interview-with-siviwe-gwarube-executive-director-of-communications-at-the-democratic-alliance/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>gbameftj2p440k1ydcyhttp70wf8t7w</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Hyginus Ekwuazi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309885</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964980</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:32:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964980</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1555" sha1="ib2w4mlr7211u1iar2qo88n21cs0zzh" xml:space="preserve">'''Hyginus Ekwuazi''' (born 1944) is a Nigerian professor, poet, novelist, film scholar, critic, and former Director-General of the Nigerian Film Corporation.

== Quotes ==

* &quot;Film is not merely entertainment; it is a powerful instrument for education, cultural preservation and national development.&quot;
** [https://guardian.ng/art/hyginus-ekwuazi-on-film-and-national-development/ Speaking on the role of film in national development]

* &quot;A nation that neglects its stories also neglects its identity.&quot;
** [https://guardian.ng/art/hyginus-ekwuazi-on-film-and-national-development/ On storytelling and national identity]

* &quot;The Nigerian film industry must strive for quality because quality is what gives any cinema lasting relevance.&quot;
** [https://thenationonlineng.net/ Interview on Nollywood and film standards]

* &quot;Culture remains the strongest foundation upon which meaningful creative work can stand.&quot;
** [https://dailytrust.com/ Interview on culture and the creative arts]

* &quot;Literature and cinema are partners in preserving the memory of a people.&quot;
** [https://guardian.ng/art/hyginus-ekwuazi-on-film-and-national-development/ On literature and film]

* &quot;Every generation has the responsibility to document its own experience for those who will come after.&quot;
** [https://dailytrust.com/ Interview on literature and cultural memory]

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ekwuazi, Hyginus}}

[[Category:1944 births]]
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Nigerian poets]]
[[Category:Nigerian writers]]
[[Category:Film scholars]]</text>
      <sha1>ib2w4mlr7211u1iar2qo88n21cs0zzh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Nnorom Azuonye</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309886</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964981</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:34:45Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964981</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1576" sha1="to6mh6jueq37tkn7hgco27utyph0b6l" xml:space="preserve">'''Nnorom Azuonye''' (12 July 1967 – 21 January 2024) was a Nigerian poet, playwright, publisher, theatre director, and founder of the Sentinel Poetry Movement.

== Quotes ==

* &quot;Poetry is a way of preserving memory against the erosion of time. It keeps alive what history often forgets.&quot;
** [https://everythinliterature.blogspot.com/2008/04/nnorom-azuonye-it-is-exciting-time-for.html &quot;It is an exciting time for Nigerian fiction&quot;] (Interview, 2008). 0

* &quot;The Nigerian writer today has more opportunities than ever before, but must also work harder to be heard above the noise.&quot;
** [https://everythinliterature.blogspot.com/2008/04/nnorom-azuonye-it-is-exciting-time-for.html &quot;It is an exciting time for Nigerian fiction&quot;] (Interview, 2008). 1

* &quot;Literature builds bridges across cultures; it reminds us that our humanity is larger than our differences.&quot;
** [https://sentinelpoetry.org.uk/magazine0203/page45.html Sentinel Poetry interview] 2

* &quot;I believe that every genuine poem begins in wonder and ends in discovery.&quot;
** [https://sentinelpoetry.org.uk/magazine0203/page45.html Sentinel Poetry interview] 3

* &quot;African literature continues to thrive because it is rooted in stories that refuse to die.&quot;
** [https://everythinliterature.blogspot.com/2008/04/nnorom-azuonye-it-is-exciting-time-for.html &quot;It is an exciting time for Nigerian fiction&quot;] 4

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Azuonye, Nnorom}}
[[Category:1967 births]]
[[Category:2024 deaths]]
[[Category:Nigerian poets]]
[[Category:Nigerian playwrights]]</text>
      <sha1>to6mh6jueq37tkn7hgco27utyph0b6l</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Iquo DianaAbasi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309887</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964982</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:37:13Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GodswillSE</username>
        <id>3210824</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964982</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2021" sha1="2srcoq4tvvsr9f4etu9v9bougp8h8yr" xml:space="preserve">'''Iquo DianaAbasi''' is a Nigerian poet, fiction writer, performance artist, editor, and environmental advocate.

== Quotes ==

* &quot;As a writer I generally do not have the luxury of becoming numb to things around me.&quot;
** [https://www.wrr.ng/features/interviews/the-writers-primary-duty-is-to-write-and-be-true-to-the-story-or-subject-of-their-writing-a-con-scio-magazine-interview-with-iquo-dianaabasi/ Interview with Words Rhymes &amp; Rhythm] – on writing and fearless speech. 

* &quot;I just write the stories that come to me and refuse to go away.&quot;
** [https://pan-african.net/in-conversation-with-iquo-dianaabasi/ ''In Conversation with Iquo DianaAbasi''] – on how she chooses stories. 

* &quot;I find myself repeatedly drawn to the human condition and the psychological turmoil that people go through when faced with challenging situations.&quot;
** [https://pan-african.net/in-conversation-with-iquo-dianaabasi/ ''In Conversation with Iquo DianaAbasi''] – on recurring themes in her writing. 

* &quot;I believe that the earth is mother to us all, and we each owe her a duty to care for her.&quot;
** [https://www.wrr.ng/features/interviews/the-writers-primary-duty-is-to-write-and-be-true-to-the-story-or-subject-of-their-writing-a-con-scio-magazine-interview-with-iquo-dianaabasi/ Interview with Words Rhymes &amp; Rhythm] – on environmental responsibility.

* &quot;Hope is definitely to be found in my writing now. There is resilience—we will not give up.&quot;
** [https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/a-conversation-with-iquo-dianaabasi/ A Conversation with Iquo DianaAbasi] – on the evolution of her writings

* &quot;When I write I do not think first of the audience... I like to think that anyone anywhere would be moved by a good story.&quot;
** [https://pan-african.net/in-conversation-with-iquo-dianaabasi/ ''In Conversation with Iquo DianaAbasi''] – on writing for readers. 

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:DianaAbasi, Iquo}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Nigerian poets]]
[[Category:Nigerian writers]]</text>
      <sha1>2srcoq4tvvsr9f4etu9v9bougp8h8yr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Fasiha Hassan</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309888</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964985</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T15:53:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964985</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3635" sha1="mazg2paf2cojf63lkj3r29p3j9bmod1" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Fasiha Hassan}}''' (born 26 November 1993) is a South African politician and former student activist. She has represented the African National Congress (ANC) in the National Assembly since June 2024 and formerly represented the party in the Gauteng Provincial Legislature between 2019 and 2024. She rose to national prominence as a student at the University of the Witwatersrand, where she was secretary general of the student representative council during the #FeesMustFall student protests of 2016.

== Quotes ==
*I mean, so many people think that activism is only about politics, but you can be an activist in any circle in any space that you're in - and I really want to drive that message home. You don't have to be in mainstream politics, you don't have to belong to a political party. It really is about being active in your society and in your community, and even taking what you're good at and what you love, and finding a way to give back to society using that in a very empowering sort of way. So for me, youth activism is fundamental to South Africa, it's fundamental to fixing South Africa. And most importantly it's fundamental to us as young people organizing, so that no longer are we going to be left out of the conversation and left out of the decision making process. It's about really just centering us in our own lives, really.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/international-youth-day-2022-interview-fasiha-hass]
*Youth Activism in South Africa, you know, you can't actually dissociate the two. The history of struggle and the history of South Africa, particularly at key moments, has always been led by young people. You can think of recent examples, 1976, you can even trace it all the way back down now, in the most recent example, to Fees Must Fall, which is really where I sort of cut my activism teeth, so to speak. So for me, it's fundamental. It's particularly important because in a country like ours, the majority of the population is under the age of 35. And so in almost any scientific idea of representation, of activism, of issues, we as young people should be the centre and the focus of it. Therefore that means us getting involved in our communities and getting active.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/international-youth-day-2022-interview-fasiha-hass]
*Yeah, so being being an MPL- this is the the more personal stuff. For me, my passions are of course around skills. Firstly, education. As much as Fees Must Fall pushed us into the higher education space, the Portfolio Committee I actually sit in on is Basic Education - so that's one of the big things. We'll all agree that education is a crisis in the country, but also something we need to focus on. My second biggest passion, and perhaps actually something that I focus more on, is around youth unemployment and creating meaningful opportunities for young people. I do that both in my capacity as an MPL and in my capacity as Chairperson of the Economic Development Portfolio Committee, but also as a youth activist and leader. There's nobody sitting in this country, or outside of it, who can say that youth unemployment is not a national crisis. It is a national crisis, and it's something that we have to take extremely seriously. If every single one of us were focused on bringing an end to structural inequality and structural unemployment, I think we'd be seeing a very different outlook and outcome in the current phase. I think that's why it has become such a big part of my passion.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/international-youth-day-2022-interview-fasiha-hass]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>mazg2paf2cojf63lkj3r29p3j9bmod1</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ossie Enekwe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309889</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964986</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:10:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964986</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="756" sha1="pvkczwt2ourqk6yjzon28preyftx7by" xml:space="preserve">'''Ossie Enekwe''', born Onuora Osmond Enekwechi (12 November 1942 – 29 April 2010), was a Nigerian dramatist, poet, novelist, and professor of theatre arts.
==Quotes==
*“WHEN I was in the university, most of our lecturers sounded as if we didn't have drama in Africa. Eventually when we started reading something by Finnegan who had done a lot of work in the area of African oral literature, many of the lecturers and scholars were repeating the same thing. I actually doubted what they were saying. When I got to the United States I came in contact with drama works from other parts of the world. I saw Japanese and Chinese drama. But above all (I saw) how drama was presented
in Japanese culture for instance.
**[https://anyflip.com/sfxc/rtgh/basic]</text>
      <sha1>pvkczwt2ourqk6yjzon28preyftx7by</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964987</id>
      <parentid>3964986</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:10:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964987</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="756" sha1="a93epm4xku9g6hmyj7ur7q24d6n8pe4" xml:space="preserve">'''Ossie Enekwe''', born Onuora Osmond Enekwechi (12 November 1942 – 29 April 2010), was a Nigerian dramatist, poet, novelist, and professor of theatre arts.
==Quotes==
*“WHEN I was in the university, most of our lecturers sounded as if we didn't have drama in Africa. Eventually when we started reading something by Finnegan who had done a lot of work in the area of African oral literature, many of the lecturers and scholars were repeating the same thing. I actually doubted what they were saying. When I got to the United States I came in contact with drama works from other parts of the world. I saw Japanese and Chinese drama. But above all (I saw) how drama was presented in Japanese culture for instance.
**[https://anyflip.com/sfxc/rtgh/basic]</text>
      <sha1>a93epm4xku9g6hmyj7ur7q24d6n8pe4</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Hope Eghagha</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309890</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964990</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:16:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964990</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2917" sha1="t2ihah4bdty505ir7twg6sfuzhaaef6" xml:space="preserve">'''Hope Oghenerukevbe Eghagha''' (born 4 September 1959) is a Nigerian professor of English Literature and Literary Analysis in the Faculty of Arts, University of Lagos, currently researching on dramatic theory and criticism. He is a playwright, poet, novelist, biographer and a columnist in The Guardian newspaper (Nigeria) editorial board. Through his weekly newspaper opinion articles, he explores complex challenges in Nigeria.
==Quotes==
*“I almost regretted coming to public service. As a lecturer in UNILAG, I never changed scores for students. I did not come to government so as to defraud by putting fake names on the list.”
*“Our people have an adage that if you catch a thief from your farm and you don’t call him a thief, he will call you a thief. To start with, I met the consultant that was doing the job here when I came. So to say I brought him in is not true at all. Two, the e-payment was introduced to curb fraud in the system.
*“I taught in UNILAG before I came in to office, and I can tell you confidently that none of my kids enjoyed the bursary. When I resumed on January 2, 2009, I found out that money had been released by the state government but most students never got them. Two days after, students came here and protested that they had not been paid their bursaries. I then sat them down, listened to them and asked them questions. Some of those people that protested then are being employed by the state government now, and they are now the ones fighting those racketeers.”
*“I then decided we had to reform the scholarship board and particularly the bursary system. That accounts for the e-payment system whereby we deal directly with the students. The board advertises, and students respond this time not by proxies. Each student fills in his or her particular on a form we have provided on the board’s website.”
*“We decided to publish the names because each year, some people will tell their parents that they didn’t get money. Publishing the names was my initiative because we wanted to tell the public that these students that we pay were not ghosts. Some of them get paid and claimed they were not paid.
*“Many of them did not know we were going to scrutinise the process. So, the first year we published everybody names that these are Delta State students. There was somebody who registered over 100 times. So that is the battle we have been fighting since then,”
*“There are some students that have not yet been paid because they used the old bank account numbers. In some cases, the name of the accounts did not match the applicants of the bursary. The board has their statistics. Since I’ve come here, any year any students wasn’t paid, it is either the students did not register properly or that there was an error. Students send me SMS making one complaint or the other and I would get back to the board to say: ‘look into this case’.”</text>
      <sha1>t2ihah4bdty505ir7twg6sfuzhaaef6</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964991</id>
      <parentid>3964990</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:18:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964991</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3400" sha1="f3vhsj8ly4rbwm53cmj3ud8dfvjl2im" xml:space="preserve">'''Hope Oghenerukevbe Eghagha''' (born 4 September 1959) is a Nigerian professor of English Literature and Literary Analysis in the Faculty of Arts, University of Lagos, currently researching on dramatic theory and criticism. He is a playwright, poet, novelist, biographer and a columnist in The Guardian newspaper (Nigeria) editorial board. Through his weekly newspaper opinion articles, he explores complex challenges in Nigeria.
==Quotes==
*“I almost regretted coming to public service. As a lecturer in UNILAG, I never changed scores for students. I did not come to government so as to defraud by putting fake names on the list.”
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]
*“Our people have an adage that if you catch a thief from your farm and you don’t call him a thief, he will call you a thief. To start with, I met the consultant that was doing the job here when I came. So to say I brought him in is not true at all. Two, the e-payment was introduced to curb fraud in the system.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]
*“I taught in UNILAG before I came in to office, and I can tell you confidently that none of my kids enjoyed the bursary. When I resumed on January 2, 2009, I found out that money had been released by the state government but most students never got them. Two days after, students came here and protested that they had not been paid their bursaries. I then sat them down, listened to them and asked them questions. Some of those people that protested then are being employed by the state government now, and they are now the ones fighting those racketeers.”
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]
*“I then decided we had to reform the scholarship board and particularly the bursary system. That accounts for the e-payment system whereby we deal directly with the students. The board advertises, and students respond this time not by proxies. Each student fills in his or her particular on a form we have provided on the board’s website.”
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]
*“We decided to publish the names because each year, some people will tell their parents that they didn’t get money. Publishing the names was my initiative because we wanted to tell the public that these students that we pay were not ghosts. Some of them get paid and claimed they were not paid.
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]
*“Many of them did not know we were going to scrutinise the process. So, the first year we published everybody names that these are Delta State students. There was somebody who registered over 100 times. So that is the battle we have been fighting since then,”
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]
*“There are some students that have not yet been paid because they used the old bank account numbers. In some cases, the name of the accounts did not match the applicants of the bursary. The board has their statistics. Since I’ve come here, any year any students wasn’t paid, it is either the students did not register properly or that there was an error. Students send me SMS making one complaint or the other and I would get back to the board to say: ‘look into this case’.”
**[https://thenationonlineng.net/battle-bursary-racketeers-eghagha/]</text>
      <sha1>f3vhsj8ly4rbwm53cmj3ud8dfvjl2im</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Saddiq Dzukogi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309891</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964992</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:23:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964992</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3305" sha1="qcwjc62izwi2pyuq14wq38o0johcnrs" xml:space="preserve">'''Saddiq Dzukogi''' (born in Minna) is a Nigerian poet and assistant professor at University of Nebraska-Lincoln and has previously taught at Mississippi State University's Department of English. He is the author of Your Crib, My Qibla, a highly-acclaimed poetry collection which has earned him the 2022 Derek Walcott Prize for Poetry, and the 2021 Julie Suk Award as a co-winner. The collection was also shortlisted for the $100,000 Nigeria Prize for Literature.
==Quotes==
*“The poems here are written not just in celebration of her life but as a ritual that will keep her eternally bound to the consciousness of the physical world. I wrote these poems in response to the urge to stay in touch, to rage, to celebrate that which I can no longer hold.”
*Thank you so much for your generous words about the collection. I find it immensely difficult to talk about the book, but I guess I am at that stage where it becomes necessary since the book’s release date is around the corner. 
*Poetry has always been a tool for me to make sense of my body and the various emotions that it experiences and endures. I fall back to poetry each time there is something about the world or the self I do not understand. Not that it always arms me with understanding, but at least it starts the journey. When I started writing the poems, it was a way to get rage out of my veins. I wrote because crying wasn’t enough, my body wanted to bleed, I wanted to see my blood and the words on pages were the closest to replicating that. I remember I was told I shouldn’t cry then. Binyavanga Wainaina, the late Kenyan writer, was the first to call, and I lamented that the folks at my workplace are pleading for me to be strong. He said, where is the quiet place you can go to? I replied, the toilet. He said go, go there and cry.
*The whole thing was written in the first seven months after her death. It’s been three years and perhaps more than two years since I wrote the last poem. I can’t say anything about the structuring of the book, because it just followed the sequence of the days and the memories as they came, and as I tried to survive the toil of grief. I didn’t follow any deliberate conceptualization in the form that you speak of; I just wanted to talk and cry and talk to my daughter. The poems were the only way I could have that conversation. 
*That part was the last edit of the book and one that I have come to like. When I was done working on the book with Kwame Dawes, he said to me the individual poems are strong but also weighs on the reader, because the lyrical “I” draws the reader close to the grief of the writer. This is after all still a work of art, even though I didn’t mean for it to be. He said to flip it to the third person and see what it reads like. It was the hardest exercise that I had to do, because at first, I saw it as me relinquishing my agency over my grief and wedging a barrier of distance between myself and my emotion. But in the end, it was a fruitful exercise because it turned the book into a dialogue and the initial voice sounded sometimes like the poet’s subconscious voice, pitched against the conscious one and that of the departed child. Other than this, the move ensured that the poems exist with a level of distance between me and the work.</text>
      <sha1>qcwjc62izwi2pyuq14wq38o0johcnrs</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964993</id>
      <parentid>3964992</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:26:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964993</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5773" sha1="hr47ynhov5kdo8ald38g4g7b8ruzqfw" xml:space="preserve">'''Saddiq Dzukogi''' (born in Minna) is a Nigerian poet and assistant professor at University of Nebraska-Lincoln and has previously taught at Mississippi State University's Department of English. He is the author of Your Crib, My Qibla, a highly-acclaimed poetry collection which has earned him the 2022 Derek Walcott Prize for Poetry, and the 2021 Julie Suk Award as a co-winner. The collection was also shortlisted for the $100,000 Nigeria Prize for Literature.
==Quotes==
*“The poems here are written not just in celebration of her life but as a ritual that will keep her eternally bound to the consciousness of the physical world. I wrote these poems in response to the urge to stay in touch, to rage, to celebrate that which I can no longer hold.”
*Thank you so much for your generous words about the collection. I find it immensely difficult to talk about the book, but I guess I am at that stage where it becomes necessary since the book’s release date is around the corner. 
*Poetry has always been a tool for me to make sense of my body and the various emotions that it experiences and endures. I fall back to poetry each time there is something about the world or the self I do not understand. Not that it always arms me with understanding, but at least it starts the journey. When I started writing the poems, it was a way to get rage out of my veins. I wrote because crying wasn’t enough, my body wanted to bleed, I wanted to see my blood and the words on pages were the closest to replicating that. I remember I was told I shouldn’t cry then. Binyavanga Wainaina, the late Kenyan writer, was the first to call, and I lamented that the folks at my workplace are pleading for me to be strong. He said, where is the quiet place you can go to? I replied, the toilet. He said go, go there and cry.
*The whole thing was written in the first seven months after her death. It’s been three years and perhaps more than two years since I wrote the last poem. I can’t say anything about the structuring of the book, because it just followed the sequence of the days and the memories as they came, and as I tried to survive the toil of grief. I didn’t follow any deliberate conceptualization in the form that you speak of; I just wanted to talk and cry and talk to my daughter. The poems were the only way I could have that conversation. 
*That part was the last edit of the book and one that I have come to like. When I was done working on the book with Kwame Dawes, he said to me the individual poems are strong but also weighs on the reader, because the lyrical “I” draws the reader close to the grief of the writer. This is after all still a work of art, even though I didn’t mean for it to be. He said to flip it to the third person and see what it reads like. It was the hardest exercise that I had to do, because at first, I saw it as me relinquishing my agency over my grief and wedging a barrier of distance between myself and my emotion. But in the end, it was a fruitful exercise because it turned the book into a dialogue and the initial voice sounded sometimes like the poet’s subconscious voice, pitched against the conscious one and that of the departed child. Other than this, the move ensured that the poems exist with a level of distance between me and the work.
*When she died, my mom was the first to say she saw her in a dream. Then my wife, her mother. Then my grandmother. I never did, until several months after when she appeared to me in a dream within a dream. I haven’t still seen her in a direct dream. Those poems marked that period and forced me to imagine what she might want to say to me, to us.
*She died because she was out of blood and the medical personnel didn’t realize it because they didn’t care for her. When my wife called to tell me that our daughter was sick, she said they had been to the hospital and offered medication. I returned from Kaduna that weekend and we slept on the same bed, three of us that Friday. I was awake most of the night, as I heard her wheezing. The next morning, we took her to one of the government hospitals in Minna, it was on a Saturday, and apparently doctors do not come to work on Saturdays. I talked one of the nurses into giving me the doctor’s phone number, which she obliged reluctantly. I called and pleaded for him to come to the hospital to check the condition of my beloved daughter.
*At first, he refused, but later agreed to come. He asked that we take her to the lab, in my arms I cradled her back and forth between the lab and the hospital’s nurses’ station. It took the doctor several hours to come. Anyway, we were given a room and we were to spend the night there. The drip was badly inserted on her forehead. I remember going to the nurses to explain to them, and they yelled at me that I was disturbing them, that it was 1 A.M. and this is the only time for them to sleep. These were nurses on night shifts, who were there to take care of the sick and did not have the barest sympathy for a one-year old child. My wife thought they would reason better with her, since she was a woman, but she only got even more rudeness from them. Maybe one day I will be in a better emotional state to tell this story fully, but I will sum it up by saying in a society where things work, those medical staff would lose their jobs at the very least.
*The butterfly. I love to think it symbolizes my daughter. It also reminds me of the time she, Baha, trapped one on the floor by making her palms into an improvised cell of sorts. She loved to trap insects that way before letting them free while chuckling. My wife showed me her palms when Baha died and said, what can I hold in these hands now that my daughter is gone? That line was speaking to that moment.</text>
      <sha1>hr47ynhov5kdo8ald38g4g7b8ruzqfw</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3964996</id>
      <parentid>3964993</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:31:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964996</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6589" sha1="kxzaiv0zci9qqlqh6tigxlfua9xhnvn" xml:space="preserve">'''Saddiq Dzukogi''' (born in Minna) is a Nigerian poet and assistant professor at University of Nebraska-Lincoln and has previously taught at Mississippi State University's Department of English. He is the author of Your Crib, My Qibla, a highly-acclaimed poetry collection which has earned him the 2022 Derek Walcott Prize for Poetry, and the 2021 Julie Suk Award as a co-winner. The collection was also shortlisted for the $100,000 Nigeria Prize for Literature.
==Quotes==
*“The poems here are written not just in celebration of her life but as a ritual that will keep her eternally bound to the consciousness of the physical world. I wrote these poems in response to the urge to stay in touch, to rage, to celebrate that which I can no longer hold.”
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*Thank you so much for your generous words about the collection. I find it immensely difficult to talk about the book, but I guess I am at that stage where it becomes necessary since the book’s release date is around the corner. 
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*Poetry has always been a tool for me to make sense of my body and the various emotions that it experiences and endures. I fall back to poetry each time there is something about the world or the self I do not understand. Not that it always arms me with understanding, but at least it starts the journey. When I started writing the poems, it was a way to get rage out of my veins. I wrote because crying wasn’t enough, my body wanted to bleed, I wanted to see my blood and the words on pages were the closest to replicating that. I remember I was told I shouldn’t cry then. Binyavanga Wainaina, the late Kenyan writer, was the first to call, and I lamented that the folks at my workplace are pleading for me to be strong. He said, where is the quiet place you can go to? I replied, the toilet. He said go, go there and cry.
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*The whole thing was written in the first seven months after her death. It’s been three years and perhaps more than two years since I wrote the last poem. I can’t say anything about the structuring of the book, because it just followed the sequence of the days and the memories as they came, and as I tried to survive the toil of grief. I didn’t follow any deliberate conceptualization in the form that you speak of; I just wanted to talk and cry and talk to my daughter. The poems were the only way I could have that conversation. 
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*That part was the last edit of the book and one that I have come to like. When I was done working on the book with Kwame Dawes, he said to me the individual poems are strong but also weighs on the reader, because the lyrical “I” draws the reader close to the grief of the writer. This is after all still a work of art, even though I didn’t mean for it to be. He said to flip it to the third person and see what it reads like. It was the hardest exercise that I had to do, because at first, I saw it as me relinquishing my agency over my grief and wedging a barrier of distance between myself and my emotion. But in the end, it was a fruitful exercise because it turned the book into a dialogue and the initial voice sounded sometimes like the poet’s subconscious voice, pitched against the conscious one and that of the departed child. Other than this, the move ensured that the poems exist with a level of distance between me and the work.
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*When she died, my mom was the first to say she saw her in a dream. Then my wife, her mother. Then my grandmother. I never did, until several months after when she appeared to me in a dream within a dream. I haven’t still seen her in a direct dream. Those poems marked that period and forced me to imagine what she might want to say to me, to us.
*She died because she was out of blood and the medical personnel didn’t realize it because they didn’t care for her. When my wife called to tell me that our daughter was sick, she said they had been to the hospital and offered medication. I returned from Kaduna that weekend and we slept on the same bed, three of us that Friday. I was awake most of the night, as I heard her wheezing. The next morning, we took her to one of the government hospitals in Minna, it was on a Saturday, and apparently doctors do not come to work on Saturdays. I talked one of the nurses into giving me the doctor’s phone number, which she obliged reluctantly. I called and pleaded for him to come to the hospital to check the condition of my beloved daughter.
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*At first, he refused, but later agreed to come. He asked that we take her to the lab, in my arms I cradled her back and forth between the lab and the hospital’s nurses’ station. It took the doctor several hours to come. Anyway, we were given a room and we were to spend the night there. The drip was badly inserted on her forehead. I remember going to the nurses to explain to them, and they yelled at me that I was disturbing them, that it was 1 A.M. and this is the only time for them to sleep. These were nurses on night shifts, who were there to take care of the sick and did not have the barest sympathy for a one-year old child. My wife thought they would reason better with her, since she was a woman, but she only got even more rudeness from them. Maybe one day I will be in a better emotional state to tell this story fully, but I will sum it up by saying in a society where things work, those medical staff would lose their jobs at the very least.
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]
*The butterfly. I love to think it symbolizes my daughter. It also reminds me of the time she, Baha, trapped one on the floor by making her palms into an improvised cell of sorts. She loved to trap insects that way before letting them free while chuckling. My wife showed me her palms when Baha died and said, what can I hold in these hands now that my daughter is gone? That line was speaking to that moment.
**[https://prismmagazine.ca/2021/02/25/fatherhood-memory-and-grief-an-interview-with-saddiq-dzukogi/]</text>
      <sha1>kxzaiv0zci9qqlqh6tigxlfua9xhnvn</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Madeleine Hicklin</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309892</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964994</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:28:53Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964994</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2145" sha1="swofp3d0zoiasjhxc238qskddwly5ge" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Madeleine Hicklin}}''' (born 3 September 1957) is a South African politician who has served as a Member of the Gauteng Provincial Legislature since June 2024. Previously, she served as a ward councillor in the City of Johannesburg Metropolitan Municipality from August 2016 to May 2019 and as a Member of the National Assembly of South Africa from May 2019 until May 2024. Hicklin is a member of the Democratic Alliance.

== Quotes ==
*I couldn’t subscribe to fanaticism on any level. I had to be on very strong middle ground. For me, it was more about the human side of life,” she says. She therefore found her political home in the Progressive Party, but she would still pay a price. She once had to escape a building that was set alight, and a special branch car was a regular feature outside her family’s home – an ever present threat of deportation for her mother.
**[https://www.sajr.co.za/passionate-politician-sets-her-sights-on-parliament/]
*I was seven when Denis was arrested. My mother had come to South Arica from Vilnius, and on the very day of his arrest, they revoked her permanent residency. My cousins and aunt came to live with us before going into exile. I would hear my aunt Esme crying every night,
**[https://www.sajr.co.za/passionate-politician-sets-her-sights-on-parliament/]
*People ask me how I can have a Muslim councillor as a friend. I respond, ‘how can I not?’ I am a staunch Jewess, and used to be in shul every Shabbat and every chag. Politics doesn’t allow me to do that, but it does allow me to live my Jewish values.
**[https://www.sajr.co.za/passionate-politician-sets-her-sights-on-parliament/]
*We need to fight for each other in this country. A lot of South African Jews don’t see the battle for equality as their fight. But someone fought for my mother to get out of Europe. If we don’t fight for others, who will be left to fight for us? We need to work for a better South Africa – both for my son and my domestic worker’s son.”
**[https://www.sajr.co.za/passionate-politician-sets-her-sights-on-parliament/]


== External link ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>swofp3d0zoiasjhxc238qskddwly5ge</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Beautiful Nubia</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309893</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3964998</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:42:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3964998</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2744" sha1="sdj7b3k19k5w0crqtq36u7h3b57pnap" xml:space="preserve">'''Beautiful Nubia''' is the performing name for Segun Akinlolu Listenⓘ(born 11 November 1968), a Nigerian-born songwriter, music composer and band leader.
==Quotes==
*There isn’t anything specifically different – we are still using the same mix of instruments to present these traditional rhythms. Our music is multifaceted and continuously evolving so it is possible to hear slight variation from album to album, which is a good and positive thing. That way you don’t become too predictable and boring.
*Our music is art on a journey – it is not a short trip – we are not in the business of producing those instant hits that fade within a short period. This kind of music slowly seeps into people’s consciousness and the kind of change it preaches is one that takes a while to manifest. Some of the messages are not that palatable to many people and it will take prolonged listening or a special reflective moment in time for their minds to be tuned in. The messages are reaching the people through all possible avenues; the results, however, may take a while to become evident. Our job is to keep those messages coming.
*In our traditional culture every man is his brother’s keeper, every woman is the mother of all and the child belongs to the community. You’re only childless if you wish to take up that title and mire your soul in despondency. If you make your life a blessing to the community, and at your passing, people come out to celebrate their common loss – that is when you can claim to have been a mother.
*Of course, Africa and Africans will ultimately be free of these shackles. It has been more than 400 years of subjugation and carefully orchestrated retardation by the continent’s external and internal abusers, so the change cannot just be in an instant. We have to keep talking to the people, to the young, to the children, re-orientating their minds, re-focusing their energies and getting them to return to a state of spiritual and physical fullness. Then, slowly, we shall see the wheels of true growth and development turn. The pendulum has swung so far the other way that it is hard to see the possibility of light at the end of this tunnel, but we shall keep talking and keep pushing these messages. A generation is coming that will eventually, totally, throw off these chains and emerge into a new dawn of development and real progress. Our music, as I always say, is a tool of mass sensitization, and we are not just opportunistic jingoists chanting leftist slogans in order to gain fame and money. I am a realist – I know that I may not live to see the changes, but there are already many who will pick up the baton and keep the work going until we achieve that true state of liberation.
*</text>
      <sha1>sdj7b3k19k5w0crqtq36u7h3b57pnap</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965000</id>
      <parentid>3964998</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:44:46Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965000</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6740" sha1="qbhlrb5tu5in1ec6akv7cz95e61ka9s" xml:space="preserve">'''Beautiful Nubia''' is the performing name for Segun Akinlolu (born 11 November 1968), a Nigerian-born songwriter, music composer and band leader.
==Quotes==
*There isn’t anything specifically different – we are still using the same mix of instruments to present these traditional rhythms. Our music is multifaceted and continuously evolving so it is possible to hear slight variation from album to album, which is a good and positive thing. That way you don’t become too predictable and boring.
*Our music is art on a journey – it is not a short trip – we are not in the business of producing those instant hits that fade within a short period. This kind of music slowly seeps into people’s consciousness and the kind of change it preaches is one that takes a while to manifest. Some of the messages are not that palatable to many people and it will take prolonged listening or a special reflective moment in time for their minds to be tuned in. The messages are reaching the people through all possible avenues; the results, however, may take a while to become evident. Our job is to keep those messages coming.
*In our traditional culture every man is his brother’s keeper, every woman is the mother of all and the child belongs to the community. You’re only childless if you wish to take up that title and mire your soul in despondency. If you make your life a blessing to the community, and at your passing, people come out to celebrate their common loss – that is when you can claim to have been a mother.
*Of course, Africa and Africans will ultimately be free of these shackles. It has been more than 400 years of subjugation and carefully orchestrated retardation by the continent’s external and internal abusers, so the change cannot just be in an instant. We have to keep talking to the people, to the young, to the children, re-orientating their minds, re-focusing their energies and getting them to return to a state of spiritual and physical fullness. Then, slowly, we shall see the wheels of true growth and development turn. The pendulum has swung so far the other way that it is hard to see the possibility of light at the end of this tunnel, but we shall keep talking and keep pushing these messages. A generation is coming that will eventually, totally, throw off these chains and emerge into a new dawn of development and real progress. Our music, as I always say, is a tool of mass sensitization, and we are not just opportunistic jingoists chanting leftist slogans in order to gain fame and money. I am a realist – I know that I may not live to see the changes, but there are already many who will pick up the baton and keep the work going until we achieve that true state of liberation.
*Yes, a revolution of the mind – in every individual and every home until the community is cleansed, consumed by a spirit of renewal and then explodes into a bright dawn, a new beginning, the birth or re-emergence of a land where those who truly deserve honour are rewarded for their hardwork, honesty, dedication, good neighbourliness and selfless service to the community. It will happen – it may take a while to manifest – but it will surely happen.
*As in many of our songs, we are just trying to embolden the people to stand up for their rights when trampled upon, and to demand truth, honest service and accountability from their so-called leaders. In ‘Osomaalo’, we employ the parable of the itinerant Ijesha merchant who refuses to leave the doorway to a debtor’s house until he is paid for his wares.  In some of our songs, we take the direct approach and lay the words out simply but, in other cases, we play around with proverbs, parables, little stories that take you in a different direction only to bring you back to a stream of thought ending in the real message within the song.
*Martha is a product of my mind: perhaps I’d caught a glimpse of her in her little house by the sea somewhere; perhaps I created her for a story that I never wrote; perhaps she came to me in a dream – I have no idea. One day I am just sitting in this empty park playing with my son and this song pops into my head – all the words, the rhythm and the melody (the same way “Seven Lives” came to me in 1989). I rush home to put it down quickly. The urge to record it is strong, and when I falter, Martha’s spirit, following me around, insists, “You must sing it, sing it”. So I did.
*Every true artist is a blessing to society, a conduit through which the ancestors speak to us and guide us. Through them the past is recalled for our correction or upliftment, and through their works the future is foretold and outlined in brilliant colours. I feel blessed to have been chosen for this work. Nothing in the Beautiful Nubia story has been invented for commercial gain, everything has evolved from a natural gift, carefully nurtured and honed and then, through some most difficult circumstances, packaged and expressed for the enjoyment and enrichment of us all.
*It has been a tough journey, and the struggle continues to this moment, but I knew what I was going into once I decided to sidestep a thriving and promising career in vet medicine for art music. I never set out to be a culture activist or anything like that. I just had this strong drive to put to use the natural gifts of songwriting and poetry that I was blessed with from birth, to use this medium to provide joy, and perhaps guidance, to those who choose to listen to me. In normal conversation, I speak the two languages I am fluent in – Yoruba and English – and I also sometimes employ the peculiar Nigerian pidgin. And when I write my songs, I just do the same. A lot of my English songs are poems employing all sorts of literary techniques and those heavy, ancient-sounding Yoruba words come from a place I do not know. I get a rhythm or melody, I squeeze out the words from my mind, and then I start to bend and blend all the elements until I sense that a fluidity has been achieved. Now I am tagged a conservator of language, a culture activist, a custodian of tradition…those are heavy labels. I thank everyone for the honour but I am just doing the job I was sent to do and the challenges I have faced, and still continue to face, are just a part of the trip. The biggest pleasure for me is in seeing the variety of people who buy our music – folks from all walks of life! And it is the same at our live concerts – I particularly love seeing the children and the youth. You go to all these universities and colleges, hundreds (and sometimes thousands) of these young, trendy folks turn out to sing our songs word for word and dance with total abandon – that is always a moment of immense fulfillment.</text>
      <sha1>qbhlrb5tu5in1ec6akv7cz95e61ka9s</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965001</id>
      <parentid>3965000</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:47:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965001</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="7559" sha1="7whqug6d4y77vuu4r5cruorelqaxsuz" xml:space="preserve">'''Beautiful Nubia''' is the performing name for Segun Akinlolu (born 11 November 1968), a Nigerian-born songwriter, music composer and band leader.
==Quotes==
*There isn’t anything specifically different – we are still using the same mix of instruments to present these traditional rhythms. Our music is multifaceted and continuously evolving so it is possible to hear slight variation from album to album, which is a good and positive thing. That way you don’t become too predictable and boring.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*Our music is art on a journey – it is not a short trip – we are not in the business of producing those instant hits that fade within a short period. This kind of music slowly seeps into people’s consciousness and the kind of change it preaches is one that takes a while to manifest. Some of the messages are not that palatable to many people and it will take prolonged listening or a special reflective moment in time for their minds to be tuned in. The messages are reaching the people through all possible avenues; the results, however, may take a while to become evident. Our job is to keep those messages coming.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*In our traditional culture every man is his brother’s keeper, every woman is the mother of all and the child belongs to the community. You’re only childless if you wish to take up that title and mire your soul in despondency. If you make your life a blessing to the community, and at your passing, people come out to celebrate their common loss – that is when you can claim to have been a mother.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*Of course, Africa and Africans will ultimately be free of these shackles. It has been more than 400 years of subjugation and carefully orchestrated retardation by the continent’s external and internal abusers, so the change cannot just be in an instant. We have to keep talking to the people, to the young, to the children, re-orientating their minds, re-focusing their energies and getting them to return to a state of spiritual and physical fullness. Then, slowly, we shall see the wheels of true growth and development turn. The pendulum has swung so far the other way that it is hard to see the possibility of light at the end of this tunnel, but we shall keep talking and keep pushing these messages. A generation is coming that will eventually, totally, throw off these chains and emerge into a new dawn of development and real progress. Our music, as I always say, is a tool of mass sensitization, and we are not just opportunistic jingoists chanting leftist slogans in order to gain fame and money. I am a realist – I know that I may not live to see the changes, but there are already many who will pick up the baton and keep the work going until we achieve that true state of liberation.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*Yes, a revolution of the mind – in every individual and every home until the community is cleansed, consumed by a spirit of renewal and then explodes into a bright dawn, a new beginning, the birth or re-emergence of a land where those who truly deserve honour are rewarded for their hardwork, honesty, dedication, good neighbourliness and selfless service to the community. It will happen – it may take a while to manifest – but it will surely happen.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*As in many of our songs, we are just trying to embolden the people to stand up for their rights when trampled upon, and to demand truth, honest service and accountability from their so-called leaders. In ‘Osomaalo’, we employ the parable of the itinerant Ijesha merchant who refuses to leave the doorway to a debtor’s house until he is paid for his wares.  In some of our songs, we take the direct approach and lay the words out simply but, in other cases, we play around with proverbs, parables, little stories that take you in a different direction only to bring you back to a stream of thought ending in the real message within the song.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*Martha is a product of my mind: perhaps I’d caught a glimpse of her in her little house by the sea somewhere; perhaps I created her for a story that I never wrote; perhaps she came to me in a dream – I have no idea. One day I am just sitting in this empty park playing with my son and this song pops into my head – all the words, the rhythm and the melody (the same way “Seven Lives” came to me in 1989). I rush home to put it down quickly. The urge to record it is strong, and when I falter, Martha’s spirit, following me around, insists, “You must sing it, sing it”. So I did.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*Every true artist is a blessing to society, a conduit through which the ancestors speak to us and guide us. Through them the past is recalled for our correction or upliftment, and through their works the future is foretold and outlined in brilliant colours. I feel blessed to have been chosen for this work. Nothing in the Beautiful Nubia story has been invented for commercial gain, everything has evolved from a natural gift, carefully nurtured and honed and then, through some most difficult circumstances, packaged and expressed for the enjoyment and enrichment of us all.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*It has been a tough journey, and the struggle continues to this moment, but I knew what I was going into once I decided to sidestep a thriving and promising career in vet medicine for art music. I never set out to be a culture activist or anything like that. I just had this strong drive to put to use the natural gifts of songwriting and poetry that I was blessed with from birth, to use this medium to provide joy, and perhaps guidance, to those who choose to listen to me. In normal conversation, I speak the two languages I am fluent in – Yoruba and English – and I also sometimes employ the peculiar Nigerian pidgin. And when I write my songs, I just do the same. A lot of my English songs are poems employing all sorts of literary techniques and those heavy, ancient-sounding Yoruba words come from a place I do not know. I get a rhythm or melody, I squeeze out the words from my mind, and then I start to bend and blend all the elements until I sense that a fluidity has been achieved. Now I am tagged a conservator of language, a culture activist, a custodian of tradition…those are heavy labels. I thank everyone for the honour but I am just doing the job I was sent to do and the challenges I have faced, and still continue to face, are just a part of the trip. The biggest pleasure for me is in seeing the variety of people who buy our music – folks from all walks of life! And it is the same at our live concerts – I particularly love seeing the children and the youth. You go to all these universities and colleges, hundreds (and sometimes thousands) of these young, trendy folks turn out to sing our songs word for word and dance with total abandon – that is always a moment of immense fulfillment.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]</text>
      <sha1>7whqug6d4y77vuu4r5cruorelqaxsuz</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965104</id>
      <parentid>3965001</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:24:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965104</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="7770" sha1="2vwclnqv9ca3hjicdn23vh8uw1xi4zp" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Beautiful nubia portriat.jpg|thumb]]
'''{{w|Beautiful Nubia}}''' is the performing name for Segun Akinlolu (born 11 November 1968), a Nigerian-born songwriter, music composer and band leader.

==Quotes==
*There isn’t anything specifically different – we are still using the same mix of instruments to present these traditional rhythms. Our music is multifaceted and continuously evolving so it is possible to hear slight variation from album to album, which is a good and positive thing. That way you don’t become too predictable and boring.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*Our music is art on a journey – it is not a short trip – we are not in the business of producing those instant hits that fade within a short period. This kind of music slowly seeps into people’s consciousness and the kind of change it preaches is one that takes a while to manifest. Some of the messages are not that palatable to many people and it will take prolonged listening or a special reflective moment in time for their minds to be tuned in. The messages are reaching the people through all possible avenues; the results, however, may take a while to become evident. Our job is to keep those messages coming.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*In our traditional culture every man is his brother’s keeper, every woman is the mother of all and the child belongs to the community. You’re only childless if you wish to take up that title and mire your soul in despondency. If you make your life a blessing to the community, and at your passing, people come out to celebrate their common loss – that is when you can claim to have been a mother.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*Of course, Africa and Africans will ultimately be free of these shackles. It has been more than 400 years of subjugation and carefully orchestrated retardation by the continent’s external and internal abusers, so the change cannot just be in an instant. We have to keep talking to the people, to the young, to the children, re-orientating their minds, re-focusing their energies and getting them to return to a state of spiritual and physical fullness. Then, slowly, we shall see the wheels of true growth and development turn. The pendulum has swung so far the other way that it is hard to see the possibility of light at the end of this tunnel, but we shall keep talking and keep pushing these messages. A generation is coming that will eventually, totally, throw off these chains and emerge into a new dawn of development and real progress. Our music, as I always say, is a tool of mass sensitization, and we are not just opportunistic jingoists chanting leftist slogans in order to gain fame and money. I am a realist – I know that I may not live to see the changes, but there are already many who will pick up the baton and keep the work going until we achieve that true state of liberation.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*Yes, a revolution of the mind – in every individual and every home until the community is cleansed, consumed by a spirit of renewal and then explodes into a bright dawn, a new beginning, the birth or re-emergence of a land where those who truly deserve honour are rewarded for their hardwork, honesty, dedication, good neighbourliness and selfless service to the community. It will happen – it may take a while to manifest – but it will surely happen.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*As in many of our songs, we are just trying to embolden the people to stand up for their rights when trampled upon, and to demand truth, honest service and accountability from their so-called leaders. In ‘Osomaalo’, we employ the parable of the itinerant Ijesha merchant who refuses to leave the doorway to a debtor’s house until he is paid for his wares.  In some of our songs, we take the direct approach and lay the words out simply but, in other cases, we play around with proverbs, parables, little stories that take you in a different direction only to bring you back to a stream of thought ending in the real message within the song.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*Martha is a product of my mind: perhaps I’d caught a glimpse of her in her little house by the sea somewhere; perhaps I created her for a story that I never wrote; perhaps she came to me in a dream – I have no idea. One day I am just sitting in this empty park playing with my son and this song pops into my head – all the words, the rhythm and the melody (the same way “Seven Lives” came to me in 1989). I rush home to put it down quickly. The urge to record it is strong, and when I falter, Martha’s spirit, following me around, insists, “You must sing it, sing it”. So I did.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

*Every true artist is a blessing to society, a conduit through which the ancestors speak to us and guide us. Through them the past is recalled for our correction or upliftment, and through their works the future is foretold and outlined in brilliant colours. I feel blessed to have been chosen for this work. Nothing in the Beautiful Nubia story has been invented for commercial gain, everything has evolved from a natural gift, carefully nurtured and honed and then, through some most difficult circumstances, packaged and expressed for the enjoyment and enrichment of us all.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]
*It has been a tough journey, and the struggle continues to this moment, but I knew what I was going into once I decided to sidestep a thriving and promising career in vet medicine for art music. I never set out to be a culture activist or anything like that. I just had this strong drive to put to use the natural gifts of songwriting and poetry that I was blessed with from birth, to use this medium to provide joy, and perhaps guidance, to those who choose to listen to me. In normal conversation, I speak the two languages I am fluent in – Yoruba and English – and I also sometimes employ the peculiar Nigerian pidgin. And when I write my songs, I just do the same. A lot of my English songs are poems employing all sorts of literary techniques and those heavy, ancient-sounding Yoruba words come from a place I do not know. I get a rhythm or melody, I squeeze out the words from my mind, and then I start to bend and blend all the elements until I sense that a fluidity has been achieved. Now I am tagged a conservator of language, a culture activist, a custodian of tradition…those are heavy labels. I thank everyone for the honour but I am just doing the job I was sent to do and the challenges I have faced, and still continue to face, are just a part of the trip. The biggest pleasure for me is in seeing the variety of people who buy our music – folks from all walks of life! And it is the same at our live concerts – I particularly love seeing the children and the youth. You go to all these universities and colleges, hundreds (and sometimes thousands) of these young, trendy folks turn out to sing our songs word for word and dance with total abandon – that is always a moment of immense fulfillment.
**[https://africainwords.com/2017/05/17/qa-beautiful-nubia-our-music-is-art-on-a-journey/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Beautiful Nubia}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1968 births]]
[[Category:Nigerian musicians]]</text>
      <sha1>2vwclnqv9ca3hjicdn23vh8uw1xi4zp</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Dami Ajayi</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309894</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965002</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:48:42Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Elcarim1</username>
        <id>3345595</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965002</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2447" sha1="q9b41gux1z8wtmc8859bowxl7m08t2k" xml:space="preserve">[[Dami Ajayi]] (born 1986) is a Nigerian writer, poet and medical doctor who co-founded Saraba, a Nigerian literary magazine in 2008.
==Quotes==
*It wasn’t inspired. I had started a magazine with a few friends of mine in junior secondary school and we had all forms of writing, except poetry, so I picked my pen and composed two poems, one called Money and another called Life.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*True, time is never enough but I am not a first. Chekhov. Maugham. Carlos Williams. They all grappled with both. And on the home front, James Henshaw, Wale Okediran, Niran Okewole. They are writing and healing simultaneously, so why blame time when you can race against it?
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*Music is my first love. As a child, I loved music. As a teenager, I pressed my ear so hard to the radio that I was the go-to guy if you knew a tune but don’t know who sang it. In a club in Nairobi last year, I was with a couple of friends and I could predict the next song of the D.J just from the opening beats, I am that crazy about music. Poetry is something I taught myself. Doctoring is what I learnt in school.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*Not a lot of my poems, no? Have you read my book? So Freud had this nice solution to all things. Pleasure, most especially sex. I am Neo-Freudian in a traditional sense. I think sex influences our lives in a myriad of ways. Plus, I wrote a good number of my poems in my early 20s so excuse their exuberance. The naughty poems have an uncanny way of being the most memorable. To the question of inspiration, that is simple. I take what my senses present to me.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*I am doing three projects. One is my collection of short stories, I took to calling it “People You May Know” recently.Second is another collection of poems called, “The World According to Affection” Third is a book on Nigerian Music.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]</text>
      <sha1>q9b41gux1z8wtmc8859bowxl7m08t2k</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965103</id>
      <parentid>3965002</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:20:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965103</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2674" sha1="sn8pupe47ujpkhkat616uk485y5695w" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Dami Ajayi.jpg|thumb]]
'''{{w|Dami Ajayi|Damilola Àjàyí}}''' (born 1986) is a Nigerian writer, poet and medical doctor who co-founded Saraba, a Nigerian literary magazine in 2008.

==Quotes==
*It wasn’t inspired. I had started a magazine with a few friends of mine in junior secondary school and we had all forms of writing, except poetry, so I picked my pen and composed two poems, one called Money and another called Life.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*True, time is never enough but I am not a first. Chekhov. Maugham. Carlos Williams. They all grappled with both. And on the home front, James Henshaw, Wale Okediran, Niran Okewole. They are writing and healing simultaneously, so why blame time when you can race against it?
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*Music is my first love. As a child, I loved music. As a teenager, I pressed my ear so hard to the radio that I was the go-to guy if you knew a tune but don’t know who sang it. In a club in Nairobi last year, I was with a couple of friends and I could predict the next song of the D.J just from the opening beats, I am that crazy about music. Poetry is something I taught myself. Doctoring is what I learnt in school.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*Not a lot of my poems, no? Have you read my book? So Freud had this nice solution to all things. Pleasure, most especially sex. I am Neo-Freudian in a traditional sense. I think sex influences our lives in a myriad of ways. Plus, I wrote a good number of my poems in my early 20s so excuse their exuberance. The naughty poems have an uncanny way of being the most memorable. To the question of inspiration, that is simple. I take what my senses present to me.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

*I am doing three projects. One is my collection of short stories, I took to calling it “People You May Know” recently.Second is another collection of poems called, “The World According to Affection” Third is a book on Nigerian Music.
**[https://nantygreens.com/interviews/dami-ajayi-finish-whatever-you-write/ Finish Whatever You Write – Interview with Dami Ajayi]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ajayi, Dami}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1986 births]]
[[Category:Nigerian writers]]</text>
      <sha1>sn8pupe47ujpkhkat616uk485y5695w</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Lindsay Barrett</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309895</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965003</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:55:27Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965003</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2650" sha1="stpvsbnmixc39rwf0b6471yknnyg0y9" xml:space="preserve">'''Carlton Lindsay Barrett''' (born 15 September 1941), also known as Eseoghene, is a Jamaican-born poet, novelist, essayist, playwright, journalist and photographer, whose work has interacted with the Caribbean Artists Movement in the UK, the Black Arts Movement in the US, and pan-Africanism in general. Leaving Jamaica in the early 1960s, he moved to Britain, where he freelanced as a broadcaster and journalist, also travelling and living elsewhere in Europe, before deciding to relocate to West Africa. Since the latter 1960s he has been based mainly in Nigeria, of which country he became a citizen in the mid-1980s, while continuing his connection to cultural ventures in the UK and US.
==Quotes==
*I am. Savannah Royals is a historical romance heist novel. It's set in 1919 to 1920, Savannah, Georgia. And it follows a con artist female main character who has grown up in the catacombs running underneath of Savannah. And she belongs to a gang who's targeting the blue blood and wealthy elite of the city of Savannah.
*So they target them and then they rob them or steal from them. So, yeah, the hook of the book is she meets a mark who is different than anybody who has ever come before him. He is very witty, perceptive, charming, and she's kind of falling for him and she's conning him. But it is also a love triangle story.
*So the conflict really comes in. She's been [00:02:00] in a long-term relationship with the leader of her criminal gang. It's an open relationship. They're not exclusive. But as the book is progressing, she's still seeing these two different men. And, and the promise of the premise is these worlds are gonna collide.
*It's pretty early in the book. I'm gonna read from chapter three. So just the basic background you need to know going in is Kat, Katarina Quinn is her name, main character. She's part of a gang. They call themselves the Wolf Pack or the Wolves. Her childhood, like friends to lovers situationship, his name is Paul and he's gonna be in this scene and where we are in space and time in the morning, she has met the new mark, Matthew DaMolin for the first time.
*And this is now evening. She is in her dorm room. She's at a [00:03:00] finishing school. So she's in her dorm room with her roommate where we start. And I do just, I have to give like the disclaimer. There is gonna be an abridged sex scene in the chapter that I'm gonna read. So, disclaimer, it does fade to black, this sex scene,
*but the book is Open Door Romance. Anybody who's listening who wants open door romance, I just wanna be clear, this is an open door romance book. Just this one scene is not, 'cause it occurs so early.</text>
      <sha1>stpvsbnmixc39rwf0b6471yknnyg0y9</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965005</id>
      <parentid>3965003</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:58:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965005</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3215" sha1="cxaz8bzxvaoovykuyybowc15qh1u1h5" xml:space="preserve">'''Carlton Lindsay Barrett''' (born 15 September 1941), also known as Eseoghene, is a Jamaican-born poet, novelist, essayist, playwright, journalist and photographer, whose work has interacted with the Caribbean Artists Movement in the UK, the Black Arts Movement in the US, and pan-Africanism in general. Leaving Jamaica in the early 1960s, he moved to Britain, where he freelanced as a broadcaster and journalist, also travelling and living elsewhere in Europe, before deciding to relocate to West Africa. Since the latter 1960s he has been based mainly in Nigeria, of which country he became a citizen in the mid-1980s, while continuing his connection to cultural ventures in the UK and US.
==Quotes==
*I am. Savannah Royals is a historical romance heist novel. It's set in 1919 to 1920, Savannah, Georgia. And it follows a con artist female main character who has grown up in the catacombs running underneath of Savannah. And she belongs to a gang who's targeting the blue blood and wealthy elite of the city of Savannah.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So they target them and then they rob them or steal from them. So, yeah, the hook of the book is she meets a mark who is different than anybody who has ever come before him. He is very witty, perceptive, charming, and she's kind of falling for him and she's conning him. But it is also a love triangle story.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So the conflict really comes in. She's been [00:02:00] in a long-term relationship with the leader of her criminal gang. It's an open relationship. They're not exclusive. But as the book is progressing, she's still seeing these two different men. And, and the promise of the premise is these worlds are gonna collide.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*It's pretty early in the book. I'm gonna read from chapter three. So just the basic background you need to know going in is Kat, Katarina Quinn is her name, main character. She's part of a gang. They call themselves the Wolf Pack or the Wolves. Her childhood, like friends to lovers situationship, his name is Paul and he's gonna be in this scene and where we are in space and time in the morning, she has met the new mark, Matthew DaMolin for the first time.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*And this is now evening. She is in her dorm room. She's at a [00:03:00] finishing school. So she's in her dorm room with her roommate where we start. And I do just, I have to give like the disclaimer. There is gonna be an abridged sex scene in the chapter that I'm gonna read. So, disclaimer, it does fade to black, this sex scene,
*but the book is Open Door Romance. Anybody who's listening who wants open door romance, I just wanna be clear, this is an open door romance book. Just this one scene is not, 'cause it occurs so early.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]</text>
      <sha1>cxaz8bzxvaoovykuyybowc15qh1u1h5</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965006</id>
      <parentid>3965005</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T16:59:02Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965006</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3328" sha1="nle7zb7hnhxc0hjqcifshzzg2gnq74e" xml:space="preserve">'''Carlton Lindsay Barrett''' (born 15 September 1941), also known as Eseoghene, is a Jamaican-born poet, novelist, essayist, playwright, journalist and photographer, whose work has interacted with the Caribbean Artists Movement in the UK, the Black Arts Movement in the US, and pan-Africanism in general. Leaving Jamaica in the early 1960s, he moved to Britain, where he freelanced as a broadcaster and journalist, also travelling and living elsewhere in Europe, before deciding to relocate to West Africa. Since the latter 1960s he has been based mainly in Nigeria, of which country he became a citizen in the mid-1980s, while continuing his connection to cultural ventures in the UK and US.
==Quotes==
*I am. Savannah Royals is a historical romance heist novel. It's set in 1919 to 1920, Savannah, Georgia. And it follows a con artist female main character who has grown up in the catacombs running underneath of Savannah. And she belongs to a gang who's targeting the blue blood and wealthy elite of the city of Savannah.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So they target them and then they rob them or steal from them. So, yeah, the hook of the book is she meets a mark who is different than anybody who has ever come before him. He is very witty, perceptive, charming, and she's kind of falling for him and she's conning him. But it is also a love triangle story.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So the conflict really comes in. She's been [00:02:00] in a long-term relationship with the leader of her criminal gang. It's an open relationship. They're not exclusive. But as the book is progressing, she's still seeing these two different men. And, and the promise of the premise is these worlds are gonna collide.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*It's pretty early in the book. I'm gonna read from chapter three. So just the basic background you need to know going in is Kat, Katarina Quinn is her name, main character. She's part of a gang. They call themselves the Wolf Pack or the Wolves. Her childhood, like friends to lovers situationship, his name is Paul and he's gonna be in this scene and where we are in space and time in the morning, she has met the new mark, Matthew DaMolin for the first time.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*And this is now evening. She is in her dorm room. She's at a [00:03:00] finishing school. So she's in her dorm room with her roommate where we start. And I do just, I have to give like the disclaimer. There is gonna be an abridged sex scene in the chapter that I'm gonna read. So, disclaimer, it does fade to black, this sex scene,
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*but the book is Open Door Romance. Anybody who's listening who wants open door romance, I just wanna be clear, this is an open door romance book. Just this one scene is not, 'cause it occurs so early.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]</text>
      <sha1>nle7zb7hnhxc0hjqcifshzzg2gnq74e</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965101</id>
      <parentid>3965006</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:15:50Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965101</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3505" sha1="m3cgaosza0blon6c6l6qi88so8877u0" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Lindsay Barrett|Carlton Lindsay Barrett]]''' (born 15 September 1941), also known as Eseoghene, is a Jamaican-born poet, novelist, essayist, playwright, journalist and photographer, whose work has interacted with the Caribbean Artists Movement in the UK, the Black Arts Movement in the US, and pan-Africanism in general. Leaving Jamaica in the early 1960s, he moved to Britain, where he freelanced as a broadcaster and journalist, also travelling and living elsewhere in Europe, before deciding to relocate to West Africa. Since the latter 1960s he has been based mainly in Nigeria, of which country he became a citizen in the mid-1980s, while continuing his connection to cultural ventures in the UK and US.

==Quotes==
*I am. Savannah Royals is a historical romance heist novel. It's set in 1919 to 1920, Savannah, Georgia. And it follows a con artist female main character who has grown up in the catacombs running underneath of Savannah. And she belongs to a gang who's targeting the blue blood and wealthy elite of the city of Savannah.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So they target them and then they rob them or steal from them. So, yeah, the hook of the book is she meets a mark who is different than anybody who has ever come before him. He is very witty, perceptive, charming, and she's kind of falling for him and she's conning him. But it is also a love triangle story.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So the conflict really comes in. She's been [00:02:00] in a long-term relationship with the leader of her criminal gang. It's an open relationship. They're not exclusive. But as the book is progressing, she's still seeing these two different men. And, and the promise of the premise is these worlds are gonna collide.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*It's pretty early in the book. I'm gonna read from chapter three. So just the basic background you need to know going in is Kat, Katarina Quinn is her name, main character. She's part of a gang. They call themselves the Wolf Pack or the Wolves. Her childhood, like friends to lovers situationship, his name is Paul and he's gonna be in this scene and where we are in space and time in the morning, she has met the new mark, Matthew DaMolin for the first time.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*And this is now evening. She is in her dorm room. She's at a [00:03:00] finishing school. So she's in her dorm room with her roommate where we start. And I do just, I have to give like the disclaimer. There is gonna be an abridged sex scene in the chapter that I'm gonna read. So, disclaimer, it does fade to black, this sex scene,
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*but the book is Open Door Romance. Anybody who's listening who wants open door romance, I just wanna be clear, this is an open door romance book. Just this one scene is not, 'cause it occurs so early.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Barrett, Lindsay}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1941 births]]
[[Category:Jamaican novelists]]</text>
      <sha1>m3cgaosza0blon6c6l6qi88so8877u0</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965102</id>
      <parentid>3965101</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:16:46Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>added thumbnail</comment>
      <origin>3965102</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3563" sha1="2jfgymw4791ooe8jfshcn160rvqpfy8" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Lindsay Barrett (Ogidi, Nigeria, 1983).jpg|thumb]]
'''[[w:Lindsay Barrett|Carlton Lindsay Barrett]]''' (born 15 September 1941), also known as Eseoghene, is a Jamaican-born poet, novelist, essayist, playwright, journalist and photographer, whose work has interacted with the Caribbean Artists Movement in the UK, the Black Arts Movement in the US, and pan-Africanism in general. Leaving Jamaica in the early 1960s, he moved to Britain, where he freelanced as a broadcaster and journalist, also travelling and living elsewhere in Europe, before deciding to relocate to West Africa. Since the latter 1960s he has been based mainly in Nigeria, of which country he became a citizen in the mid-1980s, while continuing his connection to cultural ventures in the UK and US.

==Quotes==
*I am. Savannah Royals is a historical romance heist novel. It's set in 1919 to 1920, Savannah, Georgia. And it follows a con artist female main character who has grown up in the catacombs running underneath of Savannah. And she belongs to a gang who's targeting the blue blood and wealthy elite of the city of Savannah.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So they target them and then they rob them or steal from them. So, yeah, the hook of the book is she meets a mark who is different than anybody who has ever come before him. He is very witty, perceptive, charming, and she's kind of falling for him and she's conning him. But it is also a love triangle story.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*So the conflict really comes in. She's been [00:02:00] in a long-term relationship with the leader of her criminal gang. It's an open relationship. They're not exclusive. But as the book is progressing, she's still seeing these two different men. And, and the promise of the premise is these worlds are gonna collide.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*It's pretty early in the book. I'm gonna read from chapter three. So just the basic background you need to know going in is Kat, Katarina Quinn is her name, main character. She's part of a gang. They call themselves the Wolf Pack or the Wolves. Her childhood, like friends to lovers situationship, his name is Paul and he's gonna be in this scene and where we are in space and time in the morning, she has met the new mark, Matthew DaMolin for the first time.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*And this is now evening. She is in her dorm room. She's at a [00:03:00] finishing school. So she's in her dorm room with her roommate where we start. And I do just, I have to give like the disclaimer. There is gonna be an abridged sex scene in the chapter that I'm gonna read. So, disclaimer, it does fade to black, this sex scene,
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]
*but the book is Open Door Romance. Anybody who's listening who wants open door romance, I just wanna be clear, this is an open door romance book. Just this one scene is not, 'cause it occurs so early.
**[https://katherinegrantromance.com/historical-romance-sampler-podcast/lindsay-barrett-samples-savannah-royals]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Barrett, Lindsay}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1941 births]]
[[Category:Jamaican novelists]]</text>
      <sha1>2jfgymw4791ooe8jfshcn160rvqpfy8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mbali Hlophe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309896</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965008</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:27:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965008</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2014" sha1="nz8esgb3n6l6wccw39j4zrug9738zw3" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Mbali Hlophe}}''' (born 7 February 1983) is a South African politician who served as the Member of the Executive Council (MEC) for Sport, Arts, Culture and Recreation from May 2019 to October 2022 and then as the MEC for Social Development from October 2022 until June 2024. A member of the African National Congress, she has been a Member of the Gauteng Provincial Legislature since May 2019.

== Quotes ==
*It has been great. As you know, premier Lesufi has combined the two departments, so it has been very interesting to get the two departments to work together, understanding that primary to the work that they need to do, is to answer the issue of food security in the province.
**[https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]
*People [have come to know the] department of social development to be [just] about [giving] out food parcels. The challenge that we face is that we got agriculture on the other side. We need to massify and make the two departments work together as part of bringing about social economic development. Giving out food parcels is not sustainable, but empowering people to create their own food is where agriculture becomes critical as they are able to feed themselves for a lifetime.
**[https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]
*“We want to make sure that Gauteng stamp its authority in terms of agriculture, but also grow in agro-processing
**[https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]
*Top of my priority list is to really get agriculture out there, so that our people do not see it as something for the homelands or rural areas, so when people come to Gauteng, they view themselves as advanced and they think of agriculture as the thing of yesterday when it is not. Agriculture is the future. We all eat every day
**[https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

== External link ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>nz8esgb3n6l6wccw39j4zrug9738zw3</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965099</id>
      <parentid>3965008</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:11:56Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>cleanup</comment>
      <origin>3965099</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2116" sha1="en07m7nfpkeyfzvxfvz8qrkx7ldc15a" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Mbali Hlophe}}''' (born 7 February 1983) is a South African politician who served as the Member of the Executive Council (MEC) for Sport, Arts, Culture and Recreation from May 2019 to October 2022 and then as the MEC for Social Development from October 2022 until June 2024. A member of the African National Congress, she has been a Member of the Gauteng Provincial Legislature since May 2019.

== Quotes ==
* It has been great. As you know, premier Lesufi has combined the two departments, so it has been very interesting to get the two departments to work together, understanding that primary to the work that they need to do, is to answer the issue of food security in the province.
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

* People [have come to know the] department of social development to be [just] about [giving] out food parcels. The challenge that we face is that we got agriculture on the other side. We need to massify and make the two departments work together as part of bringing about social economic development. Giving out food parcels is not sustainable, but empowering people to create their own food is where agriculture becomes critical as they are able to feed themselves for a lifetime.
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

* We want to make sure that Gauteng stamp its authority in terms of agriculture, but also grow in agro-processing
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

* Top of my priority list is to really get agriculture out there, so that our people do not see it as something for the homelands or rural areas, so when people come to Gauteng, they view themselves as advanced and they think of agriculture as the thing of yesterday when it is not. Agriculture is the future. We all eat every day
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

== External link ==
{{Wikipedia}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Hlophe, Mbali}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1983 births]]
[[Category:South African politicians]]</text>
      <sha1>en07m7nfpkeyfzvxfvz8qrkx7ldc15a</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965100</id>
      <parentid>3965099</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:12:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>added thumbnail</comment>
      <origin>3965100</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2176" sha1="1953nffrydxtdn5rjvlcjoes8slvhw3" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Mbali Dawn Hlophe.png|thumb]]
'''{{W|Mbali Hlophe}}''' (born 7 February 1983) is a South African politician who served as the Member of the Executive Council (MEC) for Sport, Arts, Culture and Recreation from May 2019 to October 2022 and then as the MEC for Social Development from October 2022 until June 2024. A member of the African National Congress, she has been a Member of the Gauteng Provincial Legislature since May 2019.

== Quotes ==
* It has been great. As you know, premier Lesufi has combined the two departments, so it has been very interesting to get the two departments to work together, understanding that primary to the work that they need to do, is to answer the issue of food security in the province.
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

* People [have come to know the] department of social development to be [just] about [giving] out food parcels. The challenge that we face is that we got agriculture on the other side. We need to massify and make the two departments work together as part of bringing about social economic development. Giving out food parcels is not sustainable, but empowering people to create their own food is where agriculture becomes critical as they are able to feed themselves for a lifetime.
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

* We want to make sure that Gauteng stamp its authority in terms of agriculture, but also grow in agro-processing
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

* Top of my priority list is to really get agriculture out there, so that our people do not see it as something for the homelands or rural areas, so when people come to Gauteng, they view themselves as advanced and they think of agriculture as the thing of yesterday when it is not. Agriculture is the future. We all eat every day
** [https://www.foodformzansi.co.za/from-townships-to-farmlands-hlophe-dreams-big/]

== External link ==
{{Wikipedia}}
*{{Commonscat-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Hlophe, Mbali}}
[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:1983 births]]
[[Category:South African politicians]]</text>
      <sha1>1953nffrydxtdn5rjvlcjoes8slvhw3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Efe Paul Azino</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309897</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965009</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:27:50Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965009</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2590" sha1="0cb6fhg1tumoqexpjx5p52o8343r56q" xml:space="preserve">'''Efe Paul Azino''' born in Lagos is a Nigerian writer, performance artist and poet, regarded &quot;as one of Nigeria's leading performance poets.&quot; He has also been regarded as one who has &quot;played a pivotal part in lifting the words from the page and giving them life&quot; in the Nigerian spoken word performance space.
==Quotes==
*A range of reasons I guess, from my preoccupation with the stage, to waiting for the confluence between a manuscript I felt somewhat confident about and a reliable publisher willing to take it on. I have been writing actively for about 17 years. I approached Farafina in 2010 about publishing a collection that came with an audio CD, but they weren’t publishing poetry at the time, even though they seemed disposed to the idea. Three years later the elements had aligned, they indicated interest, I sent in a query, signed a contract in 2014 and by November 2015 For Broken Men Who Cross Often had come through the wringer.
* A poem, I suspect, is the result of an often beautiful struggle to find the precise word or combinations of words and images, for a feeling or sometimes an idea. One, which if successful, is able to situate the reader or listener within the range of emotions it creates. If we peel back the layers of this question, however, we are likely to find elements of that recurring argument about what constitutes a good poem – with some insisting, without directly saying so, that it requires the deployment of complex language and codes. And also there is the seeming concern about the degeneration of the culture into a free for all, where every four sentences that rhyme pass for poetry. But some of the most profound works of poetry have been quite accessible. A good poem is not defined by obscurity. And the Internet has done what the Internet has done. Poems and non-poems will continually be pushed forth from a million devices, across multiple platforms, requiring no permission. Let a thousand flowers bloom…
*For me it’s less a burden of tradition as it is a need to respond, through the primary means I can identify, to Nigeria’s continued attempt to kill me. If we all, out of a need to break away from this tradition, this social commitment, refuse to bear witness, interpret and imagine a better society, then who will speak for us, for our children? This idea of writing away from protest, this growing accusation of poverty porn, is in itself becoming prescriptive. Every poet, writer, artist, should feel free to tell their truth, as long as it comes from an honest place and does not sacrifice beauty, truth or rigour.</text>
      <sha1>0cb6fhg1tumoqexpjx5p52o8343r56q</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965010</id>
      <parentid>3965009</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:29:57Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965010</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5175" sha1="jxm6gcz3pqvnwudnqc5q0nntpl1899b" xml:space="preserve">'''Efe Paul Azino''' born in Lagos is a Nigerian writer, performance artist and poet, regarded &quot;as one of Nigeria's leading performance poets.&quot; He has also been regarded as one who has &quot;played a pivotal part in lifting the words from the page and giving them life&quot; in the Nigerian spoken word performance space.
==Quotes==
*A range of reasons I guess, from my preoccupation with the stage, to waiting for the confluence between a manuscript I felt somewhat confident about and a reliable publisher willing to take it on. I have been writing actively for about 17 years. I approached Farafina in 2010 about publishing a collection that came with an audio CD, but they weren’t publishing poetry at the time, even though they seemed disposed to the idea. Three years later the elements had aligned, they indicated interest, I sent in a query, signed a contract in 2014 and by November 2015 For Broken Men Who Cross Often had come through the wringer.
* A poem, I suspect, is the result of an often beautiful struggle to find the precise word or combinations of words and images, for a feeling or sometimes an idea. One, which if successful, is able to situate the reader or listener within the range of emotions it creates. If we peel back the layers of this question, however, we are likely to find elements of that recurring argument about what constitutes a good poem – with some insisting, without directly saying so, that it requires the deployment of complex language and codes. And also there is the seeming concern about the degeneration of the culture into a free for all, where every four sentences that rhyme pass for poetry. But some of the most profound works of poetry have been quite accessible. A good poem is not defined by obscurity. And the Internet has done what the Internet has done. Poems and non-poems will continually be pushed forth from a million devices, across multiple platforms, requiring no permission. Let a thousand flowers bloom…
*For me it’s less a burden of tradition as it is a need to respond, through the primary means I can identify, to Nigeria’s continued attempt to kill me. If we all, out of a need to break away from this tradition, this social commitment, refuse to bear witness, interpret and imagine a better society, then who will speak for us, for our children? This idea of writing away from protest, this growing accusation of poverty porn, is in itself becoming prescriptive. Every poet, writer, artist, should feel free to tell their truth, as long as it comes from an honest place and does not sacrifice beauty, truth or rigour.
*Sound has always been an integral part of my process. I write with my mouth, writing the cadence into the words and images. So there’s a sense in which I write most of my poems with an instinct for the stage. There are some poems that just want sit on the page, but even these I find how to make work out loud. I think the poems that will be effective today are somewhere between the page and the stage; poems that work quite well in both mediums.
*I am yet to see a good spoken word poem, whatever that means, that focuses more on the performance/delivery than on the poem. Absolutely none. What is poetry? What is poetry supposed to do? Was there poetry in preliterate societies? Does the Iliad qualify as a poem? Was it textual in its original form? To think of poetry as something that originated from the page and must be defined by its conventions is to dismiss an entire canon. Some of the best works of poetry coming out today are from people who straddle the oral and literary traditions. Think Warsan Shire, Safia Elhillo, Nick Makoha or Selina Nwulu, London’s new young poet laureate. I think Dike Chukwumerije put it quite well when he said we compare the best of poetry on the page to the worst of poetry on the stage and dismiss spoken word poetry all together. There’s just good poetry and bad poetry, and discerning eyes and ears can make the distinction regardless of which medium it is received from.
*I read more prose than poetry when I first started writing poetry – more Baldwin than Walcott, more Vidal than Heaney. But to answer your question more directly I would say Langston Hughes. Michael Ondaatje’s The Collected Works of Billy the Kid: Left-Handed Poems. Ntozake Shange. The title poem ‘For Broken Men Who Cross Often’ was born from a desire to explore how much control or not we have over our personal morality, perpetual moral struggles in the face of accepted standards of wrong and right, how broken we all are essentially.
*The poem, in a sense, lent itself to that. I don’t remember it as a conscious choice to satirize. But there’s a sense in which the generality of Nigerians funny-meme their way through the otherwise serious and sad issues that characterize living in these parts. There is also something timid about that approach. One would be hard-pressed to put it better than Fela’s Suffering and Smiling. ‘Policeman go slap your face you no go talk, Army man go whip your yansh you go dey look like donkey.’ Satire is a relatively easier or less risky means of subversion in this instance, albeit a necessary one.</text>
      <sha1>jxm6gcz3pqvnwudnqc5q0nntpl1899b</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965011</id>
      <parentid>3965010</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:31:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965011</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5819" sha1="lije5eumi23cvtdq6ghp8ti8xy2jthk" xml:space="preserve">'''Efe Paul Azino''' born in Lagos is a Nigerian writer, performance artist and poet, regarded &quot;as one of Nigeria's leading performance poets.&quot; He has also been regarded as one who has &quot;played a pivotal part in lifting the words from the page and giving them life&quot; in the Nigerian spoken word performance space.
==Quotes==
*A range of reasons I guess, from my preoccupation with the stage, to waiting for the confluence between a manuscript I felt somewhat confident about and a reliable publisher willing to take it on. I have been writing actively for about 17 years. I approached Farafina in 2010 about publishing a collection that came with an audio CD, but they weren’t publishing poetry at the time, even though they seemed disposed to the idea. Three years later the elements had aligned, they indicated interest, I sent in a query, signed a contract in 2014 and by November 2015 For Broken Men Who Cross Often had come through the wringer.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]
* A poem, I suspect, is the result of an often beautiful struggle to find the precise word or combinations of words and images, for a feeling or sometimes an idea. One, which if successful, is able to situate the reader or listener within the range of emotions it creates. If we peel back the layers of this question, however, we are likely to find elements of that recurring argument about what constitutes a good poem – with some insisting, without directly saying so, that it requires the deployment of complex language and codes. And also there is the seeming concern about the degeneration of the culture into a free for all, where every four sentences that rhyme pass for poetry. But some of the most profound works of poetry have been quite accessible. A good poem is not defined by obscurity. And the Internet has done what the Internet has done. Poems and non-poems will continually be pushed forth from a million devices, across multiple platforms, requiring no permission. Let a thousand flowers bloom…
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]
*For me it’s less a burden of tradition as it is a need to respond, through the primary means I can identify, to Nigeria’s continued attempt to kill me. If we all, out of a need to break away from this tradition, this social commitment, refuse to bear witness, interpret and imagine a better society, then who will speak for us, for our children? This idea of writing away from protest, this growing accusation of poverty porn, is in itself becoming prescriptive. Every poet, writer, artist, should feel free to tell their truth, as long as it comes from an honest place and does not sacrifice beauty, truth or rigour.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]
*Sound has always been an integral part of my process. I write with my mouth, writing the cadence into the words and images. So there’s a sense in which I write most of my poems with an instinct for the stage. There are some poems that just want sit on the page, but even these I find how to make work out loud. I think the poems that will be effective today are somewhere between the page and the stage; poems that work quite well in both mediums.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]
*I am yet to see a good spoken word poem, whatever that means, that focuses more on the performance/delivery than on the poem. Absolutely none. What is poetry? What is poetry supposed to do? Was there poetry in preliterate societies? Does the Iliad qualify as a poem? Was it textual in its original form? To think of poetry as something that originated from the page and must be defined by its conventions is to dismiss an entire canon. Some of the best works of poetry coming out today are from people who straddle the oral and literary traditions. Think Warsan Shire, Safia Elhillo, Nick Makoha or Selina Nwulu, London’s new young poet laureate. I think Dike Chukwumerije put it quite well when he said we compare the best of poetry on the page to the worst of poetry on the stage and dismiss spoken word poetry all together. There’s just good poetry and bad poetry, and discerning eyes and ears can make the distinction regardless of which medium it is received from.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]
*I read more prose than poetry when I first started writing poetry – more Baldwin than Walcott, more Vidal than Heaney. But to answer your question more directly I would say Langston Hughes. Michael Ondaatje’s The Collected Works of Billy the Kid: Left-Handed Poems. Ntozake Shange. The title poem ‘For Broken Men Who Cross Often’ was born from a desire to explore how much control or not we have over our personal morality, perpetual moral struggles in the face of accepted standards of wrong and right, how broken we all are essentially.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]
*The poem, in a sense, lent itself to that. I don’t remember it as a conscious choice to satirize. But there’s a sense in which the generality of Nigerians funny-meme their way through the otherwise serious and sad issues that characterize living in these parts. There is also something timid about that approach. One would be hard-pressed to put it better than Fela’s Suffering and Smiling. ‘Policeman go slap your face you no go talk, Army man go whip your yansh you go dey look like donkey.’ Satire is a relatively easier or less risky means of subversion in this instance, albeit a necessary one.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/01/03/qa-uche-peter-umez-interviews-poet-efe-paul-azino/]</text>
      <sha1>lije5eumi23cvtdq6ghp8ti8xy2jthk</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Jekwu Anyaegbuna</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309898</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965012</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:36:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965012</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2390" sha1="9nmijch4umfqsy97nvtgvr7bfk3gjp6" xml:space="preserve">'''Jekwu Anyaegbuna''' is a Nigerian writer and poet. He was the first story writer from Nigeria to win the Commonwealth Short Story Prize in 2012. His stories have been published in several notable literary journals in the United States and the UK.
==Quotes==
*‘I think it would be counterproductive for me to think too much about readers while producing a piece of fiction because the enjoyment of it varies from one person to another – and it’s impossible to satisfy everybody.’
*Britain has become a Big Uncle with nieces and nephews scattered across the globe. One major connection is language. Uncle Britain has given a nephew like me the English language and expects the characters in my stories to speak English; if they don’t, one has to find an omniscient interpreter for Uncle Britain to understand, nod, smile or frown. And the characters are always happy that their fellow nephews and nieces in the Commonwealth are unified by this universal language. Although I don’t always set out to write a story that has a special connection to a particular set of people (I prefer a broader perspective), I discover that my characters struggle to find a balance between their own original worldview and that which they have acquired from slavery to colonialism to the Commonwealth.
*Good fiction is immortal. Generations come and go, reading great literary works of the previous generations. Of course, readers are important in literature. Writers write because readers read. But I think it would be counterproductive for me to think too much about readers while producing a piece of fiction because the enjoyment of it varies from one person to another – and it’s impossible to satisfy everybody. But I know that a good work appeals to many people. Thinking about readership might result in a story that is unbelievable, stereotypical, a defective contraption because I am trying to tailor the story to suit a particular set of people, cultures and circumstances, forgetting that fiction is universal. This is prescriptive writing which stymies imagination and creates a technical loophole in the accessibility of the story by the generality of fiction fans. I try to write my stories to the best of my abilities, in the most natural way I can find within myself. Thinking excessively about readers’ responses could destroy the immortality and universality of fiction.</text>
      <sha1>9nmijch4umfqsy97nvtgvr7bfk3gjp6</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965013</id>
      <parentid>3965012</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:38:09Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965013</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3002" sha1="c3wrjzwuvnwdke7rcbcbqtx7gxzbts3" xml:space="preserve">'''Jekwu Anyaegbuna''' is a Nigerian writer and poet. He was the first story writer from Nigeria to win the Commonwealth Short Story Prize in 2012. His stories have been published in several notable literary journals in the United States and the UK.
==Quotes==
*‘I think it would be counterproductive for me to think too much about readers while producing a piece of fiction because the enjoyment of it varies from one person to another – and it’s impossible to satisfy everybody.’
**[https://granta.com/jekwu-anyaegbuna-interview/]
*Britain has become a Big Uncle with nieces and nephews scattered across the globe. One major connection is language. Uncle Britain has given a nephew like me the English language and expects the characters in my stories to speak English; if they don’t, one has to find an omniscient interpreter for Uncle Britain to understand, nod, smile or frown. And the characters are always happy that their fellow nephews and nieces in the Commonwealth are unified by this universal language. Although I don’t always set out to write a story that has a special connection to a particular set of people (I prefer a broader perspective), I discover that my characters struggle to find a balance between their own original worldview and that which they have acquired from slavery to colonialism to the Commonwealth.
**[https://granta.com/jekwu-anyaegbuna-interview/]
*Good fiction is immortal. Generations come and go, reading great literary works of the previous generations. Of course, readers are important in literature. Writers write because readers read. But I think it would be counterproductive for me to think too much about readers while producing a piece of fiction because the enjoyment of it varies from one person to another – and it’s impossible to satisfy everybody. But I know that a good work appeals to many people. Thinking about readership might result in a story that is unbelievable, stereotypical, a defective contraption because I am trying to tailor the story to suit a particular set of people, cultures and circumstances, forgetting that fiction is universal. This is prescriptive writing which stymies imagination and creates a technical loophole in the accessibility of the story by the generality of fiction fans. I try to write my stories to the best of my abilities, in the most natural way I can find within myself. Thinking excessively about readers’ responses could destroy the immortality and universality of fiction.
**[https://granta.com/jekwu-anyaegbuna-interview/]
*To make my fiction believable, I have to write about what I know, with the voice I understand well, set somewhere I know. It might not work well for me to write about something I don’t know, although fiction puts no limit to my imagination. I don’t need to create doubts. So my background has a total grip on my writing. I had a rural upbringing, and sometimes this bears a lot of weight on my writing.
**[https://granta.com/jekwu-anyaegbuna-interview/]</text>
      <sha1>c3wrjzwuvnwdke7rcbcbqtx7gxzbts3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Funso Aiyejina</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309899</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965015</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:43:06Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965015</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2998" sha1="oejf4w37ycs7h7x6mx65rhe1i7h9a58" xml:space="preserve">Funso Aiyejina (1 January 1949 – 1 July 2024) was a Nigerian poet, short story writer, playwright and academic. He was Dean of Humanities and Education (until his retirement in 2014) and Professor Emeritus at the University of the West Indies. His collection of short fiction, The Legend of the Rockhills and Other Stories, won the 2000 Commonwealth Writers' Prize, Best First Book (Africa).
==Quotes==
*Ososo prepared me for the world, especially the Caribbean. At an altitude of 1,236 feet above sea level, the Nigerian town of Ososo is often described in terms of its temperate climate and its mesmerising parade of rockhills. But neither the climate nor the beauty of its landscape was the reason for its choice as a permanent abode for waves of people fleeing precolonial civil wars or spear-wielding, horse-riding, net-casting slavecatchers. Settlers in Ososo did not have the luxury of feasting on the majestic beauty of rockhills, or of luxuriating in the soothing embrace of the morning breeze. Their minds and feet were hungry for only one thing: sanctuary, provided by the many caves. Each wave of refugees contributed its language and culture to create a complex community of multiple languages and rituals. On a typical market day, you were likely to hear a good percentage of the 15 languages spoken in the Akoko-Edo Local Government Area, not counting Yoruba (the lingua franca), Pidgin, and English! As a child, I looked forward to the eve of our annual masquerade festival. My father’s ‘big room’, with its three ritual stools, welcomed relatives, friends, and strangers from the villages and towns around us. There was food, millet brew, and a riot of languages. My paternal relatives from Okene spoke Ebira; my maternal relatives from Ogori spoke Ogori; everybody spoke Yoruba, and when we wanted to exclude our visitors from both maternal and paternal lines, we spoke Ososo. That democratic palaver of languages in the ‘big room’ and the wider Ososo society prepared me for my encounter with various Nigerian languages and cultural practices at school in Northern and Western Nigeria and for the multi-cultural temperament of the Caribbean.
*My conversation with the Caribbean began in the classrooms of the University of Ife (now Obafemi Awolowo University) in the Yoruba city of Ile Ife. All English majors were required to take the Commonwealth Literature course. Edward Brathwaite, George Lamming, and V.S. Naipaul were on the reading list. The lecturer, Sam Omo Asein, had just returned with an MA from York University, Canada, where he focused on Caribbean Literature. His enthusiasm for the Caribbean segment of the course, especially for Brathwaite, was infectious. I have him to thank for my lifelong interest in Caribbean literature and culture, in the same way I owe my love of poetry, especially the poetry of Christopher Okigbo, to Imeh Ikiddeh, and my social consciousness to Tunji Adebayo, both of whom also taught me at Ife in my undergraduate years.</text>
      <sha1>oejf4w37ycs7h7x6mx65rhe1i7h9a58</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965016</id>
      <parentid>3965015</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:44:49Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965016</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="6969" sha1="ozyut12e9scrf2oieb9ioinfqeyh8q7" xml:space="preserve">'''Funso Aiyejina''' (1 January 1949 – 1 July 2024) was a Nigerian poet, short story writer, playwright and academic. He was Dean of Humanities and Education (until his retirement in 2014) and Professor Emeritus at the University of the West Indies. His collection of short fiction, The Legend of the Rockhills and Other Stories, won the 2000 Commonwealth Writers' Prize, Best First Book (Africa).
==Quotes==
*Ososo prepared me for the world, especially the Caribbean. At an altitude of 1,236 feet above sea level, the Nigerian town of Ososo is often described in terms of its temperate climate and its mesmerising parade of rockhills. But neither the climate nor the beauty of its landscape was the reason for its choice as a permanent abode for waves of people fleeing precolonial civil wars or spear-wielding, horse-riding, net-casting slavecatchers. Settlers in Ososo did not have the luxury of feasting on the majestic beauty of rockhills, or of luxuriating in the soothing embrace of the morning breeze. Their minds and feet were hungry for only one thing: sanctuary, provided by the many caves. Each wave of refugees contributed its language and culture to create a complex community of multiple languages and rituals. On a typical market day, you were likely to hear a good percentage of the 15 languages spoken in the Akoko-Edo Local Government Area, not counting Yoruba (the lingua franca), Pidgin, and English! As a child, I looked forward to the eve of our annual masquerade festival. My father’s ‘big room’, with its three ritual stools, welcomed relatives, friends, and strangers from the villages and towns around us. There was food, millet brew, and a riot of languages. My paternal relatives from Okene spoke Ebira; my maternal relatives from Ogori spoke Ogori; everybody spoke Yoruba, and when we wanted to exclude our visitors from both maternal and paternal lines, we spoke Ososo. That democratic palaver of languages in the ‘big room’ and the wider Ososo society prepared me for my encounter with various Nigerian languages and cultural practices at school in Northern and Western Nigeria and for the multi-cultural temperament of the Caribbean.
*My conversation with the Caribbean began in the classrooms of the University of Ife (now Obafemi Awolowo University) in the Yoruba city of Ile Ife. All English majors were required to take the Commonwealth Literature course. Edward Brathwaite, George Lamming, and V.S. Naipaul were on the reading list. The lecturer, Sam Omo Asein, had just returned with an MA from York University, Canada, where he focused on Caribbean Literature. His enthusiasm for the Caribbean segment of the course, especially for Brathwaite, was infectious. I have him to thank for my lifelong interest in Caribbean literature and culture, in the same way I owe my love of poetry, especially the poetry of Christopher Okigbo, to Imeh Ikiddeh, and my social consciousness to Tunji Adebayo, both of whom also taught me at Ife in my undergraduate years.
*I am not a diarist. I only remember events that have transformed into metaphors. Like that trip from Port of Spain back to the University of the West Indies campus at St Augustine in my first few months in Trinidad in 1977. After Acadia University, Nova Scotia (1975/76), where I was in a sea of whiteness (also my first experience of winter and snow), I was glad to be in a country where my skin did not Other me. That evening, I had gone over to Port of Spain to meet with a new friend-interest. After the ice-cream-and-banana-split date, I got into a taxi at Independence Square to head back to St Augustine. I was in the back seat with two other passengers. While they were there, I could keep quiet. Halfway to St. Augustine they disembarked, and now I had to respond to the driver’s chat. The moment I spoke, he announced, ‘You is from Africa!’ Well, well, well, the colour of my accent had given me away. His questions came fast and furious. I gladly answered them. They were nothing like those I had to answer in Canada, that night on the 9th floor of Cromwell Tower, when it was our turn to host the weekend floor-party. The questioner then was a member of the football team – the Axemen. After I told him I was Nigerian, he wanted to know how come I spoke English? Where, when, and how did I learn to speak English? I flashed back to my undergraduate Commonwealth Literature course when we had to read books by Canadian, Indian and West Indian writers, among others. I took a deep breath, looked straight into his soul, and announced that just before I boarded the plane in Lagos for Canada, I was given an injection of English and by the time I landed at Halifax, I had become a fluent speaker. Never did find out if he keyed into the sarcasm, but we did become friends enough for him to invite me on a weekend visit to his family on Prince Edward Island.
*The taxi driver’s questions, however, were sophisticated – about history, politics and life in Africa. He wanted to know about Nelson Mandela, Kwame ‘Nukrumah’, Julius ‘Kneeyerere’. ‘What do Africans think of us?’ As we approached my drop-off point, I stretched over to pay. The streetlights were already on, his gaze was on the road (evidence he was not keen on night driving), but his mind was on the conversation. A happy smile reflected back to me from the rear-view mirror as he announced, ‘You is the first African from the homeland to ride in my car. The ride is on the house.’ I thanked him as he pulled over to let me out, but he was off before I could get his name. I went back to the taxi stand a number of times, hoping to find him. I never did. Less than three years after that experience, I would complete a PhD thesis on ‘The Image of Africa in West Indian Literature’, but nothing in the literature came anywhere close to that episode in shaping my understanding of what Africa means to conscious New World Africans.
*I had been accepted to study at all three campuses of the University of the West Indies. Until the very last minute, Jamaica was my choice. In those days in Nigeria, every West Indian was a Jamo. I considered Barbados because of Edward Brathwaite (I didn’t know him as Kamau at that time) and George Lamming, whose works I had studied in that same undergraduate Commonwealth Literature course. Lamming’s In the Castle of My Skin exposed me to a range of Caribbean emotional and political responses to enslavement, colonialism, and independence. Brathwaite’s Masks showed me how to create visceral modern poetry from African history and culture and how to smash conventions. I learnt from Brathwaite that it was okay to break up words and sentences to liberate the truth buried in them. Trinidad was my third choice. Naipaul was my only reference point and our lecturer at Ife, although he praised the work, was lukewarm about him. It would be years before I could figure out his unenthusiastic attitude to Naipaul, the man.</text>
      <sha1>ozyut12e9scrf2oieb9ioinfqeyh8q7</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965017</id>
      <parentid>3965016</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T17:46:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965017</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="7624" sha1="axb6bxxll8qvgqomn6dx9d3ck15fa12" xml:space="preserve">'''Funso Aiyejina''' (1 January 1949 – 1 July 2024) was a Nigerian poet, short story writer, playwright and academic. He was Dean of Humanities and Education (until his retirement in 2014) and Professor Emeritus at the University of the West Indies. His collection of short fiction, The Legend of the Rockhills and Other Stories, won the 2000 Commonwealth Writers' Prize, Best First Book (Africa).
==Quotes==
*Ososo prepared me for the world, especially the Caribbean. At an altitude of 1,236 feet above sea level, the Nigerian town of Ososo is often described in terms of its temperate climate and its mesmerising parade of rockhills. But neither the climate nor the beauty of its landscape was the reason for its choice as a permanent abode for waves of people fleeing precolonial civil wars or spear-wielding, horse-riding, net-casting slavecatchers. Settlers in Ososo did not have the luxury of feasting on the majestic beauty of rockhills, or of luxuriating in the soothing embrace of the morning breeze. Their minds and feet were hungry for only one thing: sanctuary, provided by the many caves. Each wave of refugees contributed its language and culture to create a complex community of multiple languages and rituals. On a typical market day, you were likely to hear a good percentage of the 15 languages spoken in the Akoko-Edo Local Government Area, not counting Yoruba (the lingua franca), Pidgin, and English! As a child, I looked forward to the eve of our annual masquerade festival. My father’s ‘big room’, with its three ritual stools, welcomed relatives, friends, and strangers from the villages and towns around us. There was food, millet brew, and a riot of languages. My paternal relatives from Okene spoke Ebira; my maternal relatives from Ogori spoke Ogori; everybody spoke Yoruba, and when we wanted to exclude our visitors from both maternal and paternal lines, we spoke Ososo. That democratic palaver of languages in the ‘big room’ and the wider Ososo society prepared me for my encounter with various Nigerian languages and cultural practices at school in Northern and Western Nigeria and for the multi-cultural temperament of the Caribbean.
**[https://writersmosaic.org.uk/limited-series/is-english-we-speaking-african-caribbean-dialogue/travelling-lines-funso-aiyejina/]
*My conversation with the Caribbean began in the classrooms of the University of Ife (now Obafemi Awolowo University) in the Yoruba city of Ile Ife. All English majors were required to take the Commonwealth Literature course. Edward Brathwaite, George Lamming, and V.S. Naipaul were on the reading list. The lecturer, Sam Omo Asein, had just returned with an MA from York University, Canada, where he focused on Caribbean Literature. His enthusiasm for the Caribbean segment of the course, especially for Brathwaite, was infectious. I have him to thank for my lifelong interest in Caribbean literature and culture, in the same way I owe my love of poetry, especially the poetry of Christopher Okigbo, to Imeh Ikiddeh, and my social consciousness to Tunji Adebayo, both of whom also taught me at Ife in my undergraduate years.
**[https://writersmosaic.org.uk/limited-series/is-english-we-speaking-african-caribbean-dialogue/travelling-lines-funso-aiyejina/]
*I am not a diarist. I only remember events that have transformed into metaphors. Like that trip from Port of Spain back to the University of the West Indies campus at St Augustine in my first few months in Trinidad in 1977. After Acadia University, Nova Scotia (1975/76), where I was in a sea of whiteness (also my first experience of winter and snow), I was glad to be in a country where my skin did not Other me. That evening, I had gone over to Port of Spain to meet with a new friend-interest. After the ice-cream-and-banana-split date, I got into a taxi at Independence Square to head back to St Augustine. I was in the back seat with two other passengers. While they were there, I could keep quiet. Halfway to St. Augustine they disembarked, and now I had to respond to the driver’s chat. The moment I spoke, he announced, ‘You is from Africa!’ Well, well, well, the colour of my accent had given me away. His questions came fast and furious. I gladly answered them. They were nothing like those I had to answer in Canada, that night on the 9th floor of Cromwell Tower, when it was our turn to host the weekend floor-party. The questioner then was a member of the football team – the Axemen. After I told him I was Nigerian, he wanted to know how come I spoke English? Where, when, and how did I learn to speak English? I flashed back to my undergraduate Commonwealth Literature course when we had to read books by Canadian, Indian and West Indian writers, among others. I took a deep breath, looked straight into his soul, and announced that just before I boarded the plane in Lagos for Canada, I was given an injection of English and by the time I landed at Halifax, I had become a fluent speaker. Never did find out if he keyed into the sarcasm, but we did become friends enough for him to invite me on a weekend visit to his family on Prince Edward Island.
**[https://writersmosaic.org.uk/limited-series/is-english-we-speaking-african-caribbean-dialogue/travelling-lines-funso-aiyejina/]
*The taxi driver’s questions, however, were sophisticated – about history, politics and life in Africa. He wanted to know about Nelson Mandela, Kwame ‘Nukrumah’, Julius ‘Kneeyerere’. ‘What do Africans think of us?’ As we approached my drop-off point, I stretched over to pay. The streetlights were already on, his gaze was on the road (evidence he was not keen on night driving), but his mind was on the conversation. A happy smile reflected back to me from the rear-view mirror as he announced, ‘You is the first African from the homeland to ride in my car. The ride is on the house.’ I thanked him as he pulled over to let me out, but he was off before I could get his name. I went back to the taxi stand a number of times, hoping to find him. I never did. Less than three years after that experience, I would complete a PhD thesis on ‘The Image of Africa in West Indian Literature’, but nothing in the literature came anywhere close to that episode in shaping my understanding of what Africa means to conscious New World Africans.
**[https://writersmosaic.org.uk/limited-series/is-english-we-speaking-african-caribbean-dialogue/travelling-lines-funso-aiyejina/]
*I had been accepted to study at all three campuses of the University of the West Indies. Until the very last minute, Jamaica was my choice. In those days in Nigeria, every West Indian was a Jamo. I considered Barbados because of Edward Brathwaite (I didn’t know him as Kamau at that time) and George Lamming, whose works I had studied in that same undergraduate Commonwealth Literature course. Lamming’s In the Castle of My Skin exposed me to a range of Caribbean emotional and political responses to enslavement, colonialism, and independence. Brathwaite’s Masks showed me how to create visceral modern poetry from African history and culture and how to smash conventions. I learnt from Brathwaite that it was okay to break up words and sentences to liberate the truth buried in them. Trinidad was my third choice. Naipaul was my only reference point and our lecturer at Ife, although he praised the work, was lukewarm about him. It would be years before I could figure out his unenthusiastic attitude to Naipaul, the man.
**[https://writersmosaic.org.uk/limited-series/is-english-we-speaking-african-caribbean-dialogue/travelling-lines-funso-aiyejina/]</text>
      <sha1>axb6bxxll8qvgqomn6dx9d3ck15fa12</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Asclepius (treatise)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309900</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965022</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:06:40Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ficaia</username>
        <id>3085955</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;{{italic title}} The '''''[[w:Asclepius (treatise)|Asclepius]]''''', also known as the '''''Perfect Discourse''''' (from the Greek ''Logos teleios''), is a religio-philosophical [[Hermetica|Hermetic treatise]]. The original Greek text, which was likely written in [[Alexandria]] between 100 and 300 AD, is largely lost and only a few fragments remain. However, the full text is extant in an early [[Latin]] translation, and fragments from a [[W:Coptic language|Coptic]] trans...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965022</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1544" sha1="m96dab9yp19zgene7or6y81nd74e10k" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
The '''''[[w:Asclepius (treatise)|Asclepius]]''''', also known as the '''''Perfect Discourse''''' (from the Greek ''Logos teleios''), is a religio-philosophical [[Hermetica|Hermetic treatise]]. The original Greek text, which was likely written in [[Alexandria]] between 100 and 300 AD, is largely lost and only a few fragments remain. However, the full text is extant in an early [[Latin]] translation, and fragments from a [[W:Coptic language|Coptic]] translation have also been found among the [[W:Nag Hammadi library|documents discovered in Nag Hammadi]].

== Quotes ==

[[File:Artotypes of the removal transport and erection of Cleopatras Needle from Egypt to the Metropolitan Museum in New York in Egyptian obelisks Plate no I.jpg|thumb|Words graven upon stones that tell of thy piety.]]

* ''O Aegypte, Aegypte, religionum tuarum solae supererunt fabulae, eaeque incredibiles posteris tuis; solaque supererunt verba lapidibus incisa, tua pia facta narrantibus.'' 
** O [[Ancient Egypt|Egypt]], Egypt, of thy religious rites nought will survive but idle tales which thy children's children will not believe; nought will survive but words graven upon stones that tell of thy piety.
** ''The Latin Asclepius'' III.25 ([[Hermes Trismegistus]] speaks), in W. Scott, ''Hermetica'', vol. 1 (1924), p. 342; quoted in [[William Gillan Waddell|W. G. Waddell]], ''[[Manetho|Manetho, with an English Translation]]'' (1940), p. vi

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

[[Category:Literary works]]
[[Category:History of Egypt]]</text>
      <sha1>m96dab9yp19zgene7or6y81nd74e10k</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>E. C. Osondu</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309901</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965023</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:15:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965023</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3029" sha1="8175mtjyo7jk6ed5jjlpmfzc62q4zy5" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Epaphras Chukwuenweniwe Osondu|Epaphras  Chukwuenweniwe Osondu ]]'''predominantly known as E. C. Osondu, is a Nigerian writer known for his short stories. His story Waiting won the 2009 Caine Prize for African Writing,n for which he had been a finalist in 2007 with his story Jimmy Carter's Eyes. Osondu had previously won the Allen and Nirelle Galso Prize for Fiction[4] and his story A Letter from Home was judged one of &quot;The Top Ten Stories on the Internet&quot; in 2006[by whom?].
Osondu's writing has been published in Agni, Guernica,Vice, Fiction,[citation needed] and The Atlantic. His debut collection of short stories, Voice of America, was published in 2010.
==Quotes==
*People will urge you to go to school. They’ll tell you an American education is useful. That is not true. That is 80’s. You are here to hustle.
*There was no internet in my formative years so you had to submit work by snail-mail. There were not as many venues to publish as there is nowadays. Regardless, writers no matter what time they live in must perpetually deal with the three sisters known as Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt.
**[https://themuseunn.com/to-wait-is-to-believe-to-stop-waiting-is-to-give-in-to-despair-an-interview-with-e-c-osondu/]
*A life of relentless horror is another definition of hell. Humor is the elixir for survival. To quote a poet –the world is too much with us, but as Samuel Beckett reminds us, we must go on.
**[https://themuseunn.com/to-wait-is-to-believe-to-stop-waiting-is-to-give-in-to-despair-an-interview-with-e-c-osondu/]
*Every story is unique. Every story determines how it should be told. Some come like the rain and is poured out in one fell swoop, some come in drips and some come squeaking like an ungreased piece of metal.
**[https://themuseunn.com/to-wait-is-to-believe-to-stop-waiting-is-to-give-in-to-despair-an-interview-with-e-c-osondu/]
*I have a story that I have been working on over the past three years. I have written the first draft of a story over one week. I write the way I read. I like to have lots of writing irons in the fire same way I usually read two or three books at a time.
**[https://toluogunlesi.wordpress.com/2011/07/20/the-writing-life-10-questions-for-ec-osondu/]
*Sourcing for blurbs/endorsements for your book is a hard and energy sapping process and you have to do the sourcing yourself.
**[https://toluogunlesi.wordpress.com/2011/07/20/the-writing-life-10-questions-for-ec-osondu/]
*I think it is a blessing to write and get your work published and out there  and have people buy and read your book and love or hate it. Think of the number of immensely talented people who have not been blessed in this way
**[https://toluogunlesi.wordpress.com/2011/07/20/the-writing-life-10-questions-for-ec-osondu/]
*Humour is indispensable in life. We need it to survive both in the writing life and other lives as well.
**[https://toluogunlesi.wordpress.com/2011/07/20/the-writing-life-10-questions-for-ec-osondu/]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category:living people]]</text>
      <sha1>8175mtjyo7jk6ed5jjlpmfzc62q4zy5</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Tekno</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309902</id>
    <redirect title="Tekno Miles" />
    <revision>
      <id>3965035</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T18:49:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>GrimRob</username>
        <id>1187925</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>GrimRob moved page [[Tekno]] to [[Tekno Miles]]: matches WP name</comment>
      <origin>3965035</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="25" sha1="p7qmq9k45pehn7p7uou2k33pe0fwsgj" xml:space="preserve">#REDIRECT [[Tekno Miles]]</text>
      <sha1>p7qmq9k45pehn7p7uou2k33pe0fwsgj</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Ken Wiwa</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309903</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965042</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:25:46Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ojewuyib</username>
        <id>3173331</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965042</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="674" sha1="p8qpkmxihufzsm6tqzkpnumuts9b8n1" xml:space="preserve">
'''Kenule &quot;Ken&quot; Bornale Tsaro-Wiwa''' (born Ken Saro-Wiwa Jr.; 28 November 1968 – 18 October 2016), although he himself chose to use the name Ken Wiwa, was a Nigerian journalist and author. The eldest son of human rights activist [[Ken Saro-Wiwa]], he worked as an adviser to three Nigerian presidents.

==Quotes==
*&quot;Father is not a saint even if people want him to be. But he did die for his principles and no one can forget that. Here is a guy who could have had a comfortable life anywhere in the world, yet he chose to go to the most dangerous place&quot;.
**&quot;[https://www.independent.co.uk/voices/quotes-of-the-week-5640207.html Ken Wiwa]&quot;
==Eternal Links==
{{Wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>p8qpkmxihufzsm6tqzkpnumuts9b8n1</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Anthony Appiah</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309904</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965046</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T19:45:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965046</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2300" sha1="0eulo0ugl9w3b0cfu2vr9c6npjl9k9w" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Kwame Akroma-Ampim Kusi Anthony Appiah|Kwame Akroma-Ampim Music]]'''( born 8 May 1954) is a Ghanaian-English-American philosopher and writer who has written about political philosophy, ethics, the philosophy of language and mind, and African intellectual history. Appiah is Professor of Philosophy and Law at New York University, where he joined the faculty in 2014,and has been a Silver Professor since 2025.He was previously the Laurance S. Rockefeller University Professor of Philosophy at Princeton University.Appiah was elected President of the American Academy of Arts and Letters in January 2022.
==Quotes==
*Once you start offering reasons for ignoring the interests of others, however, reasoning itself will usually draw you into a kind of universality. A reason is an offer of a ground for thinking or feeling or doing something. And it isn’t a ground for me, unless it’s a ground for you. If someone really thinks that some group of people genuinely doesn’t matter at all, he will suppose they are outside the circle of those to whom justifications are due.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/14612.Kwame_Anthony_Appiah#:~:text=All%20Faith%20is%20false%2C%20all,bit%20the%20whole%20to%20own.]
*And, like many philosophers, I am of the school that what goes without saying often goes even better with saying.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/14612.Kwame_Anthony_Appiah#:~:text=All%20Faith%20is%20false%2C%20all,bit%20the%20whole%20to%20own]
*All Faith is false, all Faith is true: Truth is the shattered mirror strown In myriad bits; while each believes His little bit the whole to own.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/14612.Kwame_Anthony_Appiah#:~:text=All%20Faith%20is%20false%2C%20all,bit%20the%20whole%20to%20own]
*In the world of identity, utterances have functions, separate from their meanings. 
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/14612.Kwame_Anthony_Appiah#:~:text=All%20Faith%20is%20false%2C%20all,bit%20the%20whole%20to%20own]
*Self-regarding considerations can be as universalizable as other-regarding considerations: we owe things to ourselves as well to others
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/14612.Kwame_Anthony_Appiah#:~:text=All%20Faith%20is%20false%2C%20all,bit%20the%20whole%20to%20own]
==Quotes==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>0eulo0ugl9w3b0cfu2vr9c6npjl9k9w</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Mary Asabea Ashun</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309905</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965052</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:06:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965052</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1911" sha1="gdpmqvlhyws367ahjwp34fit463tel3" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Mary Asabea Ashun|Mary  Asabea Ashun]]'''(born 1968) is a Ghanaian-Canadian educator, author and researcher; she is principal of Ghana International School in Accra, Ghana.
==Quotes==
*True leadership isn’t about being flawless—it’s about being human, leading with authenticity, and fostering growth”
**[https://www.linkedin.com/posts/dr-mary-asabea-ashun-88b4545_its-today-true-leadership-isnt-about-activity-7351822407474511873-xBDB]
*I felt that there were different parts of me that contributed to the stories. Dr. Mary Ashun is the official me – the Scientist/Writer so that was easy. Asabea Ashun is my multi-cultural self – the one who has lived in Ghana, US, UK, Canada and has had such broad experiences that she has no choice but to bring these experiences into her writing. Abena Apea is my fully Ghanaian self – the one who writes Ghanaian stories that Ghanaian children can relate to because she used Ghanaian expressions.
**[https://geosireads.wordpress.com/2011/11/01/one-on-one-with-ghanaian-writer-dr-mary-a-ashun/]
* I get stories from people I meet. My husband always jokes that people have no idea what’s going through my mind when they talk to me!  I also read a lot but I would say my listening skills are so well honed that I make a mental note of everything I hear to include in future stories.
**[https://geosireads.wordpress.com/2011/11/01/one-on-one-with-ghanaian-writer-dr-mary-a-ashun/]
*By 2050, one in four people globally will be African. Yet walk into most international schools, even those on this continent, and ask what percentage of the curriculum comes from Africa. The answer is embarrassingly small.”
**[https://www.oppidaneducation.com/heads-and-tales/dr-mary-ashun-ceo-of-ghana-international-school-on-why-international-schools-are-failing-to-prepare-children-for-an-african-century]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
[[Category: living people]]</text>
      <sha1>gdpmqvlhyws367ahjwp34fit463tel3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Empi Baryeh</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309906</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965054</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T20:19:04Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965054</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1608" sha1="qdxi0ddvtnrv4pfs0uh8vryn8tii0mk" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Empi Baryeh|Empi Baryeh]]'''(born 18 September) is a Ghanaian-born contemporary romance novelist who is currently an assistant registrar of the University of Ghana.
==Quotes==
*Financier, Kalahari Asanti, specialises in corporate takeovers, but his next conquest is personal. The Kingdom of Bagumi owes him a great debt, one he intends to collect from King Ibrahim Saene, the father he’s never met and the man he holds responsible for his mother’s death.

Kal’s quest for revenge brings him face-to-face with the woman who’s been haunting his dreams for the past eight months. Now, the man who grew up with nothing is determined to reclaim everything the Royal House of Saene took from him … including her.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/58341052-the-illegitimate-prince About her book the illegitimate prince]
*When systems fail, people get blamed, but if Ghana is serious about education transformation, I think we would do well to ask, with real curiosity rather than accusation, what recruitment, deployment, and matching infrastructure already exists, who is using it, what might already be working quietly that the rest of us simply don't know about, and what it would take to get recruitment, deployment, and design pulling in the same direction, so that we are no longer left looking at what appears, from where I sit, to be a nation training teachers it cannot place, while staffing its classrooms with teachers it never trained.
**[https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/when-systems-fail-people-get-blamed-ghanas-own-dr-mary-asabea-ashun-a1w8f]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>qdxi0ddvtnrv4pfs0uh8vryn8tii0mk</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Eugene W. Hilgard</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309907</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965080</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:00:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Suslindisambiguator</username>
        <id>275269</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>created page with 3 quotes</comment>
      <origin>3965080</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4714" sha1="g74u2wb22q8bouu2w9ha003g25mbo65" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Eugene W. Hilgard|Eugene Woldemar Hilgard}}''' (January 5, 1833 – January 8, 1916) was a German-born, American chemist, geologist, professor of agricultural chemistry, and {{w|Pedology|pedologist}}. Sometimes called the &quot;father of modern {{w|soil science}} in the United States&quot;, he was elected in 1872 to the U.S. {{w|National Academy of Sciences}}.

==Quotes==
* ... we are still able to secure specimens of by far the greater portion of the [[United States]], that even the {{w|plow}} has never yet touched, and where {{w|manure}}, outside of the {{w|Flower garden|flower}} and {{w|vegetable garden}}, is an unknown quantity.  We can find on these [[soil]]s their original vegetation, which is so largely used by the settler as a means of diagnosing the actual productiveness of the land he proposes to clear, and of prognosing its durability. The value of this method is so emphatically recognized as to have given rise to the remark, by a distinguished member of this body, that he &quot;would rather trust an old {{w|farmer}} to tell him about the value of a soil, than the best {{w|chemist}} alive.&quot;&lt;br&gt;Now, we may perhaps agree with [[/Samuel William Johnson (chemist)|Professor Johnson]] in this matter ...
** {{cite journal|year=1881|title=Article XXXI.—The objects and interpretation of soil analyses.|journal=American Journal of Science|volume=3|issue=129|pages=183–197|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=i6sEAAAAYAAJ&amp;pg=PA184}} (quote from p. 184)

* … having camped in the {{w|Paradise Valley (Montana)|Yellowstone valley}} on a convenient elevation above the sodden ground, I was put to precipitate flight by an army of large ants issuing from beneath my rubber mattress. Daylight observation revealed to me the counterparts of the Louisiana mounds, only as a rule less thickly grouped than on the {{w|Western Gulf coastal grasslands|Louisiana prairies}}; and on excavating some of these mounds which had been deserted by their aggressive inhabitants, I noted precisely the same structureless earth I had seen in the {{w|Opelousas, Louisiana|Opelousas}} prairie, only this time traversed by half-obliterated burrows, which in the Louisiana mound-fields were almost wholly imperceptible, or at least undistinguishable from old root-tracks.&lt;br&gt;It therefore seems to me that the question of the Louisiana mounds resolves itself into a biological problem, viz., what kind of ant might have built up these elevations, and what causes might have operated to depopulate them.
** {{cite journal|date=April 7, 1905|title=The prairie mounds of Louisiana|journal=Science|volume=21|issue=536|pages=551–552}} [https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.21.536.551.b p. 551] [https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.21.536.552 p. 552]

* One characteristic of the {{w|Floodplain|flood-plain}} lands of all the larger [[rivers]], and more or less of all [[streams]] subject to periodic overflows, is that the land immediately adjoining the banks is both higher and more sandy than are the lands farther back from the stream. The cause of this phenomenon is that as lateral overflow diminishes the velocity of that flow, its coarser portions are deposited near the river banks, while the finer particles are carried farther away, until finally only the finest—[[clay]]-substance—reach the [[lagoon]]s or [[lake]]s filled with the overflow or {{w|Bacwater (river)|back-water}}, and there in the course of time deposited as heavy clay &quot;swamp&quot; soils. The same occurs where rivers empty into lakes or the sea; and these [[:wiktionary:slack-water|slack-water]] or delta lands are, as a rule, the most productive on the river's course. The continued productiveness of alluvial soil is moreover in many cases assured by the deposition, during overflows, or fresh soil-material brought down from the head waters of the streams. The [[Nile]], and the {{w|Colorado River|Colorado river}} of the West, illustrate this point.
** {{cite book|title=Soils, Their Formation, Properties, Composition and Relations to Climate and Plant Growth in the Humid and Arid Regions|publisher=Macmillan|year=1911|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=l4E5AAAAMAAJ&amp;pg=PA15|page=15}} (593 pages; 1st edition 1906)

==External links==
* {{wikipedia-inline}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Hilgard, Eugene W.}}
[[Category:1833 births]]
[[Category:1916 deaths]]
[[Category:Academics from Germany]]
[[Category:Academics from the United States]]
[[Category:Geologists from Germany]]
[[Category:Geologists from the United States]]
[[Category:Heidelberg University alumni]]
[[Category:Members of the United States National Academy of Sciences]]
[[Category:University of California, Berkeley faculty]]
[[Category:University of Michigan faculty]]</text>
      <sha1>g74u2wb22q8bouu2w9ha003g25mbo65</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>User:ELApro/Rowland Keable</title>
    <ns>2</ns>
    <id>309908</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965087</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T21:43:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>ELApro</username>
        <id>1595</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;'''Rowland Keable''' (Born July, 1963) and a founding member of Earth Building UK and Ireland (EBUKI) and director of Rammed Earth Consulting CIC, London.&lt;ref&gt;[https://find-and-update.company-information.service.gov.uk/officers/h9lVBXfZ968m9vO4Nesk12Ada_o/appointments Rowland John KEABLE] @gov.uk company search&lt;/ref&gt;&lt;ref&gt;[https://www.ebuki.co/meet-the-team Meet the Team] @ebuki.co, Earth Building UK and Ireland&lt;/ref&gt; He is an honorary {{w|UNESCO}} Chair - Earthen archite...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965087</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="15304" sha1="qu2ggjy9ppnkiau00i7w0ophum5v2pv" xml:space="preserve">'''Rowland Keable''' (Born July, 1963) and a founding member of Earth Building UK and Ireland (EBUKI) and director of Rammed Earth Consulting CIC, London.&lt;ref&gt;[https://find-and-update.company-information.service.gov.uk/officers/h9lVBXfZ968m9vO4Nesk12Ada_o/appointments Rowland John KEABLE] @gov.uk company search&lt;/ref&gt;&lt;ref&gt;[https://www.ebuki.co/meet-the-team Meet the Team] @ebuki.co, Earth Building UK and Ireland&lt;/ref&gt; He is an honorary {{w|UNESCO}} Chair - Earthen architecture, building cultures and sustainable development member, with [[Anna Heringer]], Martin Rauch and {{w|Dominique Gauzin-Müller}}.&lt;ref&gt;[https://terra.hypotheses.org/148#:~:text=Keable Partners and members of the UNESCO Chair Earthen Architecture] (2013)&lt;/ref&gt; He is coauthor, with his father and architect, Julian Keable, of the 2nd edition of ''Rammed Earth Structures: A Code of Practice'' (2011).&lt;ref&gt;''[https://catalogue.bl.uk/permalink/44BL_MAIN/1ukv6a9/alma990160476530109251 Rammed Earth Structures: a code of practice]'' (2011) @British Library&lt;/ref&gt;

== Quotes ==
=== ''Rammed Earth Structures: a Code of Practice'' (2011) ===
:&lt;small&gt;Julian &amp; Rowland Keable, 2nd edition of the book published by Julian Keable, 1996.&lt;/small&gt;

=== Preface to the Second Edition ===
* Since the first edition... we have been successful in having The Code adopted as a National Standard in Zimbabwe... We wrote ''The Code'' in recognition of the fact that earth as a building material needed Standards of comparison with other regulated building materials... After working in Africa for over 15 years we saw that earth construction could enable thousands... to have affordable, comfortable domestic, educational and commercial buildings. Without a Standard in place... earth... would remain an illegal, unregulated option.

* We... sent two copies to every government in Africa in the hope of capturing their interest. When ''The Code'' was first published I was working in Zimbabwe.., Standards Association of Zimbabwe (SAZ) [had] always been a not-for-profit and non-government organization. ...I approached SAZ with a proposal to move ''The Code'' towards Standards adoption. This was enthusiastically accepted, but... took over four years involving a diverse range of stakeholders and complex approval and assessment procedures.

* [[w:Portland cement|[C]ement]], now... [~]10 per cent of all our [[w:Greenhouse gas emissions|CO&lt;sub&gt;2&lt;/sub&gt; emissions]] and unaffordable to most in sub-Saharan Africa, holds a coveted position in the building regulations of all countries. ...This is a ...problem facing potentially billions of people ...either build with cement, or build illegally.

* Once the Zimbabwe Standard was published even the Zimbabwe Minister for Education was freed to build a rammed earth school. ...[A] Standard means... even a minister... with no technical knowledge is enabled to start using previously banned materials.

* In... 2007 I attended a Southern African Development Community (SADC) meeting in Madagascar to propose the harmonization of the Zimbabwe Standard across the whole SADC region (15 countries). ...[T]here was unanimous agreement to harmonize. This process is... ongoing, with another regional group, COMESA..., which would mean 27 countries... allowing earth structures in urban areas, home to over 600,000,000 people.

* [R]ule of regulation... prevents widespread access to affordable, decent housing. ...[W]ith regulation ...against most building materials which aren’t cement, monopolies grow ...around those products ...[and] those norms become intractable. ...[C]hange ...needs to happen ...with ...urgency. [Both] [p]overty and climate change alleviation in this case go hand in hand. ...[C]hange has to happen at every level: schools of architecture, engineering and surveying, technical colleges and trade schools, contractors large and small, government and the financial institutions all need to play a role in rolling back the status quo.

=== Climate Matters Week Day 3 Earth Architecture (Nov 17, 2023) ===
:&lt;small&gt;/ Rowland Keable and Ivan Morison. A YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iqIbi14CXc video source] from [[w:Architectural Association School of Architecture|AA School of Architecture]] channel.&lt;/small&gt;

* The French really started this... in the late 70s, and little by little the rest of the world is catching up...&lt;!--1:19; &amp;t=79s--&gt;

* We are the UNESCO Earthen Architecture Chair UK organism.., which is strange because mostly the UNESCO chair recognizes universities... [Y]ou've got Earth Building UK and Ireland.., we're UNESCO... all to do with earth building...&lt;!--1:34; &amp;t=94s--&gt;

* This is where my dad started his career... and it's where I'm ending mine... He came here in 1946... [M]ost of the people he studied with had been in [[World War III|the war]]... and... had all kinds of mad ideas, like communism and Christianity... [I]t was a fertile moment to be an architect because everything's been bombed flat... [T]hese older guys had... thought through a lot of these things... to.. rebuild everything, and he's coming in as an 18 year old... [O]ne of the things they said to him... generally was, &quot;We want to go on building sites... to understand what happens... because we don't think we can be architects it we're not talking to builders.&quot; ...So I was brought up... with my dad spending a week with the scaffolders, and a week with the bricklayers, and a week with the chippies, and... for me that... sounded like the most exciting bit of the whole thing.., which is why I've ended up as a builder...&lt;!--2:40; &amp;t=160s--&gt;

* In '57 he and my Mom bought a Land Rover and they drove to Iran... [S]uddenly he's exposed to forms.., shapes.., cultures and materials that... he's never seen... and we were brought up with that... [H]e was always... looking forward in... interesting ways.&lt;!--4:25; &amp;t=265s--&gt;

* [M]y brother... is holding open a {{w|VELUX}} window.., the first... I'd ever seen, this is in 1975.., the loft extension at our house.... [H]e's put an air source heat pump in.., and that's what heated the house and the hot water. Nobody had done that. ...[A] wind turbine is making electricity on the roof ...in 1975. ...Later on he gets into ...hydrogen and all of these things ...where building design and energy meet...&lt;!--5:05; &amp;t=305s--&gt;
** &lt;small&gt;Ref: [https://www.velux.com/company/history VELUX history]&lt;/small&gt;

* [A] friend of his says, &quot;How do we build without cement?&quot; because they want to build a new capital city of Tanzania at Dodoma, and... they can't afford the cement... [M]y dad... finds this book from 1920 by Kauf William Ellis... about building with rammed earth and carbon... [etc.]&lt;!--6:18; &amp;t=378s--&gt;

* Jump forward 10 years... [M]y... first little rammed earth building in {{w|Freetown}}, {{w|Sierra Leone}}... funded by the [[w:Commonwealth Foundation|Commonwealth]]... just to show... that you could... make a building that was affordable... I was 21 or 22, and... made every possible mistake... with a book from 1920, in a culture and a space that I really had no clue what was going on.&lt;!--6:58; &amp;t=418s--&gt;

* I thought... you could have so many thing stacked up against it, and still come out with some kind of result. There must be something in that... [T]hat's why I... stuck with what I'm doing.&lt;!--7:39; &amp;t=459s--&gt;

* [T]ypes of earth building... it's a whole family, and... not a dysfunctional family. ...They all get on really well together, and you can put them together in all sorts of interesting ways.&lt;!--11:58; &amp;t=718s--&gt;

* Mass earth... is also known as cobb.., mudwall, or... clay dabin, and like all of the earth building technologies, it's... global... You'll find mass earth in Iraq.., Afghanistan.., China, and Australia. It's... global... All of these things are really global, and we're just trying to give them this generic name.&lt;!--12:25; &amp;t=718s--&gt;

* [F]ramed earth... called waddle and dob, or stick and rice, or mud and stud... It's got lots of different names.&lt;!--13:33; &amp;t=813s--&gt;

* [L]ight earth... is first cousin to framed earth in that it's associated with timber frames, but it's filling in between... with a bio-aggregate or a biofiber, like wheat straw, or hemp, but... bound together with [[clay]], and that gives... all sorts of... interesting possibilities to do with... maintenance of air quality... [etc.]&lt;!--13:42; &amp;t=822s--&gt;

* [M]oulded and compressed earth brick and block [MEBs and CEBs... i.e.,] mud bricks, or adobe... It started out as CEB, compressed earth block, then... moulded... is done in a wetter state... [i.e.,] adobe block.&lt;!--14:33; &amp;t=873s--&gt;

* Turf is the strange one of the bunch... dug up and cut into shapes... and laid in a way like stone. ...[P]eople in [[Iceland]]... have still got... a strong knowledge tradition, skills tradition of using turf.&lt;!--15:51; &amp;t=951s--&gt;

* Everything gets put together with earth mortar. ...A high status [300 year old] Georgian building... is built out of stone with clay mortar. Clay mortars, you ...find them everywhere. Whereas in the past I would have looked at that as a stone building.., now it's ours. ...What's ...holding it in place ...is the mortar.&lt;!--16:36; &amp;t=996s--&gt;

* [R]ammed earth... it's had a lot of press, but it's not the answer to everything, because you don't always get the material at site... [etc.]&lt;!--17:34; &amp;t=1054s--&gt;

* [T]he earth plasters... is where the industry is... I could plaster... every surface in this room, including the glass... Clay will stick to anything, and it will do lots... of different things... It will manage the humidity... without having to turn a machine on or... off. It will sequester [[w:Volatile organic compound|VOC]]s... It is fireproof. It does a lot of things, working hard... [I]n the Apple store in Brussels... [T]hey know people going into there will feel comfortable and... buy more phones. ...[Y]ou've got different color, different texture. Clay does all of this... Pretty much every Nando's in this country is clay plastered... again.., because they want people to come in, feel comfortable and buy more [[w:Piri piri#Piri-piri sauce|Piri-piri]] chicken.&lt;!--17:54; &amp;t=1074s--&gt;

* [T]he point of EBUKI is that we're trying to get it out there... Go and look at ebuki.co, the web site, and you'll find the link to the YouTube channel, which has got masses of how-to-do-it's... and all of the talks from Clayfests... It's not a closed shop. ...It's an open house.&lt;!--20:13; &amp;t=1213s--&gt;
** &lt;small&gt;'''Ref: 1''') [https://www.ebuki.co/ Earth Building UK and Ireland] official web site. '''2''') [https://www.youtube.com/@EarthBuildingUKIreland/playlists Earth Building UK &amp; Ireland] YouTube channel&lt;/small&gt;

* In Europe... often the framing is big heavy oak frames with woven panels in them, but... this... very very lightweight thing... something you... turn it into beautiful living spaces with materials that... will never run out... We've gone from dobbing... to plastering... with some ''{{w|sgraffito}}'', different color and now suddenly you've got something... semi-bulletproof, soundproof, fireproof...&lt;!--22:57; &amp;t=1377s--&gt;

* Of all the [[w:Plasticity (physics)|plastic]] materials, this is the most plastic. It's extraordinary... that... we're not just going mad for it, because you can... do so many things with it.&lt;!--24:17; &amp;t=1457s--&gt;

* [T]hey did a lot or work to push the carbon down... [I]t's a big timber structure.., but it's... not going to work for par 0 until you... take the blocks and lay them into the walls, and suddenly... you've got a whole lot of mass... dealing with... air quality.., thermally, [etc.]&lt;!--26:57; &amp;t=1617s--&gt;

* A nursery school.. dome designed by... [[w:de:Gernot Minke|Gernot Minke]].., a German professor... really into domes and vaults, and all these... materials. ...It's the load bearing central structure ...made from ...funny shaped bricks ...This is the most plastic material going.&lt;!--27:56; &amp;t=1676s--&gt;
** &lt;small&gt;'''Ref: 1''') [https://www.brick.org.uk/brick-bulletin/eco-friendly-clay-brick-and-strocks The Village Nursery, Bellingdon, Bucks, UK] @brick.org.uk, Brick Development Association. '''2''')  [https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gernot_Minke Gernot Minke] @German Wikipedia. '''3''') [http://gernotminke.gernotminke.de/projects/ Gernot Minke] official web site. &lt;/small&gt;

* I hold the UNESCO chair on earthen architecture because of the work I did no standards for earth building in [[Zimbabwe]], and in Africa more widely.&lt;!--33:20; &amp;t=2000s--&gt;

* [F]or a lot of the plastic stuff, what's involved is heat, either to get it into that state, or to change it into some other state, whereas this is not. This is about adding water.., a user friendly... medium. You can it into a plastic state, you can take it out of the plastic state. You can take it back into a plastic state, you can take it out... There's no end to it. You just add water... you dry it out.., add water, you dry it out.&lt;!--39:01; &amp;t=2341s--&gt;

* We're not inventing anything. Everything... has been done, but... you... can turn it into different shapes and forms, and step away from a... stale discussion about what is modern and what is classical, and all of this... nonsense, and just use the materials for what they are useful for... [T]hat's by chatting with the scientists and looking at local practice... and the whole culture thing... courtyard.., street.., rural or... urban... Are we in a place where it just rains the whole time, and we have to think...&lt;!--40:13; &amp;t=2413s--&gt;

* [W]e're melding together mass earth and light earth... Light earth is normally associated with timber structures, but we've put it together... There are so many little films on the YouTube channel... and you can have a go and have a look at... how do you do this test, 2 minutes, and then you can... go away and do a little test... &lt;!--41:26; &amp;t=2486s--&gt;

* [T]here's this whole discussion about... what the architect wants
&lt;!--41:26; &amp;t=2486s--&gt;

== Quotes about Keable ==

* '''Rowland Keable''' has been working with rammed earth and building rammed earth structures since the mid-1980s. In collaborating on this Code of Practice a new direction was set leading to the Code becoming a national standard with progress towards a regional standard... This... has led to guidelines for use in the UK and recognition of the material by the Building Research Establishment in their Green Guide. Rowland is a founder member of Earth Building UK, a national trade and research body for earth building technologies, and runs a consulting practice working principally in the UK and Africa.
* Julian Keable, Rowland Keabl, ''Rammed Earth Structures'' (2011) About the Authors

== See also ==
* [[Architecture]]
* [[Mud]]

==References==
{{reflist}}

== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* [https://rammedearthconsulting.com/ Rammed Earth Consulting CIC] Keable's company
* [https://www.ebuki.co/ Earth Building UK and Ireland] (EBUKI) official web site.
* [https://www.youtube.com/@EarthBuildingUKIreland/playlists Earth Building UK &amp; Ireland] (ebuki) YouTube channel
* [https://ecvetearth.hypotheses.org/ ECVET Earth Building]
* [https://terra.hypotheses.org/ The UNESCO Chair Earthen architecture]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Keable, Rowland}}
[[Category:1963 births]]
[[Category:Businesspeople from London]]
[[Category:Educators]]</text>
      <sha1>qu2ggjy9ppnkiau00i7w0ophum5v2pv</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Dave Fleischer</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309909</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965109</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:37:45Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Films by director|Fleischer, Dave]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965109</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="46" sha1="hgzew6jn2fyqdlm8n4865ii3elc37wh" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Fleischer, Dave]]</text>
      <sha1>hgzew6jn2fyqdlm8n4865ii3elc37wh</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Films directed by Rudolf Ising</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309910</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965114</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:44:48Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Films by director|Ising, Rudolf]] [[Category:Rudolf Ising films]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965114</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="76" sha1="oqgaymemjvmav9s76crn8xl8ksmf9cu" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Ising, Rudolf]]
[[Category:Rudolf Ising films]]</text>
      <sha1>oqgaymemjvmav9s76crn8xl8ksmf9cu</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965115</id>
      <parentid>3965114</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:45:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>/* */</comment>
      <origin>3965115</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="44" sha1="7znd02padb8y66t2ipsc2ep36bvmr4v" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Films by director|Ising, Rudolf]]</text>
      <sha1>7znd02padb8y66t2ipsc2ep36bvmr4v</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown?</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309911</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965119</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:55:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Hhrlan23</username>
        <id>3222540</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;{{italic title}} '''''[[w:Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown? |Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown?]]''''' is the 24th [[w:Prime time|prime-time]] animated [[w:Television special|television special]] based upon the comic strip ''[[w:Peanuts|Peanuts]]'', by [[w:Charles M. Schulz|Charles M. Schulz]]. It originally aired on the [[w:CBS|CBS]] network on February 21, 1983. In the special, [[w:Charlie Brown|Charlie Brown]] tries to cope with learning that [[w:Linus Van Pelt|Linus]] and...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965119</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1088" sha1="d7798lm2mc72ij0rewwcec10wqixses" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
'''''[[w:Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown? |Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown?]]''''' is the 24th [[w:Prime time|prime-time]] animated [[w:Television special|television special]] based upon the comic strip ''[[w:Peanuts|Peanuts]]'', by [[w:Charles M. Schulz|Charles M. Schulz]]. It originally aired on the [[w:CBS|CBS]] network on February 21, 1983. In the special, [[w:Charlie Brown|Charlie Brown]] tries to cope with learning that [[w:Linus Van Pelt|Linus]] and [[w:Lucy Van Pelt|Lucy]] are moving away. The special is adapted from a storyline from the comic strip that lasted from May 9 to May 21, 1966.

==Dialogue==
:''[Coming soon]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0123119|title=Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown?}}

[[Category:1983 animated films]] [[Category:1983 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:CBS shows]]
[[Category:ABC shows]]
[[Category:Peanuts TV specials]]
[[Category:Television programs based on comics]]
[[Category:Films directed by Phil Roman]]</text>
      <sha1>d7798lm2mc72ij0rewwcec10wqixses</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965120</id>
      <parentid>3965119</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T22:58:47Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>03isrflo62410</username>
        <id>1485946</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965120</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1105" sha1="s71qq1la7cmum5pxztd6wz0lqjpacv3" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
{{db|No quotes}}
'''''[[w:Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown? |Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown?]]''''' is the 24th [[w:Prime time|prime-time]] animated [[w:Television special|television special]] based upon the comic strip ''[[w:Peanuts|Peanuts]]'', by [[w:Charles M. Schulz|Charles M. Schulz]]. It originally aired on the [[w:CBS|CBS]] network on February 21, 1983. In the special, [[w:Charlie Brown|Charlie Brown]] tries to cope with learning that [[w:Linus Van Pelt|Linus]] and [[w:Lucy Van Pelt|Lucy]] are moving away. The special is adapted from a storyline from the comic strip that lasted from May 9 to May 21, 1966.

==Dialogue==
:''[Coming soon]''

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{IMDb title|id=0123119|title=Is This Goodbye, Charlie Brown?}}

[[Category:1983 animated films]] [[Category:1983 American animated films]]
[[Category:American animated short films]]
[[Category:Traditionally animated short films]]
[[Category:CBS shows]]
[[Category:ABC shows]]
[[Category:Peanuts TV specials]]
[[Category:Television programs based on comics]]
[[Category:Films directed by Phil Roman]]</text>
      <sha1>s71qq1la7cmum5pxztd6wz0lqjpacv3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rumble (2021 animated film)</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309912</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965124</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:17:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>NetflixExpirationTradition</username>
        <id>3297184</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;{{film-stub}} '''''Rumble''''' is a 2021 American animated sports comedy film directed by Hamish Grieve and written by Grieve and Matt Lieberman. Loosely based on Monster on the Hill, a graphic novel by Rob Harrell, the film stars the voices of [[Will Arnett]], [[Geraldine Viswanathan]], and [[Terry Crews]]. Set in a world where humans and giant monsters exist, an aspiring trainer trains an amateur giant monster wrestler to go up against the world champion.  The film was...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965124</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2840" sha1="2yjkrsh0pd2rshhqvjzispdszdt5mwy" xml:space="preserve">{{film-stub}}
'''''Rumble''''' is a 2021 American animated sports comedy film directed by Hamish Grieve and written by Grieve and Matt Lieberman. Loosely based on Monster on the Hill, a graphic novel by Rob Harrell, the film stars the voices of [[Will Arnett]], [[Geraldine Viswanathan]], and [[Terry Crews]]. Set in a world where humans and giant monsters exist, an aspiring trainer trains an amateur giant monster wrestler to go up against the world champion.

The film was released in the United States on December 15, 2021, on [[Paramount+]], and received mixed reviews from critics.

== Steve the Stupendous (aka Rayburn Jr) ==
* Maybe they're right. Winning is not really my thing.
* ''[repeated line]'' Get ready for the Moon Boom!

== Dialogue ==
:TBA

== Cast ==
* [[Will Arnett]] as Steve/Rayburn Jr, a giant red reptilian monster and amateur wrestler with a passion for dancing.
** [[Gracen Newton]] as young Steve/Rayburn Jr.
* [[Geraldine Viswanathan]] as Winnie Coyle, an aspiring monster wrestling trainer and Jimbo's daughter
** [[Kaya McLean]] as young Winnie
* [[Terry Crews]] as Tentacular, a giant shark-headed tentacled monster who is the reigning Monster Wrestling champion and is jealous of Rayburn Sr's legacy
* [[Fred Melamed]] as the Mayor
* [[Charles Barkley]] as Rayburn Sr, Steve's late father and champion
* [[Chris Eubank]] as King Gorge, a giant horned bulldog-like monster and former monster wrestling champion
* [[Bridget Everett]] as Lady Mayhen, a giant toucan-like monster with manicured nails who runs the underground wrestling matches
* [[Ben Schwartz]] as Jimothy Brett-Chadley III, Tentacular's snooty agent
* [[Brian Baumgartner]] as Klonk, a giant warthog-like monster
* [[Jimmy Tatro]] as Lights Out McGinty/Mac, a giant anglerfish-like monster and wrestling commentator
* [[Becky Lynch]] as Axehammer, a giant reptile-like monster from the underground wrestling
* [[Roman Reigns]] as Ramarilla Jackson, a giant gorilla-like monster with ram horns
* [[Tony Danza]] as Siggy, Tentacular's elderly coach who was Jimbo Coyle's former assistant and protégé
* [[Susan Kelechi Watson]] as Maggie Coyle, Winnie's mother and Jimbo's widow
* [[Carlos Gomez]] as Jimbo Coyle, a legendary monster wrestling trainer and Winnie's late father
* [[Stephen A. Smith]] as Marc Remy, a monster wrestling commentator
* [[Michael Buffer]] as a Stoker announcer
* [[Tony Shalhoub]] as Fred, a man who owns a diner in Stoker
* [[Greta Lee]] as the Councilwoman
* [[John DiMaggio]] as Tattoo Guy and Betting Guy
* [[Jamal Duff]] as Denise
* [[Carlos Alazraqui]] as Nerdle, a giant spider monkey-like monster
* [[Chris Anthony Lansdowne]] as Farmer
* [[Christopher Knights]] as King Gorge's Coach
* [[Fred Tatasciore]] as Referee

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=8337158}}

[[Category:2021 films]]</text>
      <sha1>2yjkrsh0pd2rshhqvjzispdszdt5mwy</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965126</id>
      <parentid>3965124</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-14T23:41:06Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>NetflixExpirationTradition</username>
        <id>3297184</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965126</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2893" sha1="079778yax23enmyqkdznex4pib8i9dz" xml:space="preserve">{{film-stub}}
'''''Rumble''''' is a 2021 American animated sports comedy film directed by Hamish Grieve and written by Grieve and Matt Lieberman. Loosely based on Monster on the Hill, a graphic novel by Rob Harrell, the film stars the voices of [[Will Arnett]], [[Geraldine Viswanathan]], and [[Terry Crews]]. Set in a world where humans and giant monsters exist, an aspiring trainer trains an amateur giant monster wrestler to go up against the world champion.

The film was released in the United States on December 15, 2021, on [[Paramount+]], and received mixed reviews from critics.

== Steve the Stupendous (aka Rayburn Jr) ==
* I'm sorry, but this is why I left Stoker in the first place. Everyone wants me to be my dad, and I'm not.
* ''[repeated line]'' Get ready for the Moon Boom!

== Dialogue ==
:TBA

== Cast ==
* [[Will Arnett]] as Steve/Rayburn Jr, a giant red reptilian monster and amateur wrestler with a passion for dancing.
** [[Gracen Newton]] as young Steve/Rayburn Jr.
* [[Geraldine Viswanathan]] as Winnie Coyle, an aspiring monster wrestling trainer and Jimbo's daughter
** [[Kaya McLean]] as young Winnie
* [[Terry Crews]] as Tentacular, a giant shark-headed tentacled monster who is the reigning Monster Wrestling champion and is jealous of Rayburn Sr's legacy
* [[Fred Melamed]] as the Mayor
* [[Charles Barkley]] as Rayburn Sr, Steve's late father and champion
* [[Chris Eubank]] as King Gorge, a giant horned bulldog-like monster and former monster wrestling champion
* [[Bridget Everett]] as Lady Mayhen, a giant toucan-like monster with manicured nails who runs the underground wrestling matches
* [[Ben Schwartz]] as Jimothy Brett-Chadley III, Tentacular's snooty agent
* [[Brian Baumgartner]] as Klonk, a giant warthog-like monster
* [[Jimmy Tatro]] as Lights Out McGinty/Mac, a giant anglerfish-like monster and wrestling commentator
* [[Becky Lynch]] as Axehammer, a giant reptile-like monster from the underground wrestling
* [[Roman Reigns]] as Ramarilla Jackson, a giant gorilla-like monster with ram horns
* [[Tony Danza]] as Siggy, Tentacular's elderly coach who was Jimbo Coyle's former assistant and protégé
* [[Susan Kelechi Watson]] as Maggie Coyle, Winnie's mother and Jimbo's widow
* [[Carlos Gomez]] as Jimbo Coyle, a legendary monster wrestling trainer and Winnie's late father
* [[Stephen A. Smith]] as Marc Remy, a monster wrestling commentator
* [[Michael Buffer]] as a Stoker announcer
* [[Tony Shalhoub]] as Fred, a man who owns a diner in Stoker
* [[Greta Lee]] as the Councilwoman
* [[John DiMaggio]] as Tattoo Guy and Betting Guy
* [[Jamal Duff]] as Denise
* [[Carlos Alazraqui]] as Nerdle, a giant spider monkey-like monster
* [[Chris Anthony Lansdowne]] as Farmer
* [[Christopher Knights]] as King Gorge's Coach
* [[Fred Tatasciore]] as Referee

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|id=8337158}}

[[Category:2021 films]]</text>
      <sha1>079778yax23enmyqkdznex4pib8i9dz</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Wikiquote:Quote of the day/July 15, 2026</title>
    <ns>4</ns>
    <id>309913</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965131</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:00:33Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kalki</username>
        <id>71</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;{{Wikiquote:Quote of the day/Template | image1 = The Brazen Serpent, Mount Nebo.jpg | image1px = 262px | image2 = Walter Benjamin vers 1928.jpg | image2px = 292px | quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt;There is a [[secret]] agreement between [[past]] [[generations]] and the [[present]] one. Our coming was expected on [[earth]]. Like every generation that preceded us, we have been endowed with a weak [[Messianic]] [[power]], a power to which the past has a claim. That claim cannot...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965131</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="524" sha1="af1dqq3qyeza39o7gncdx5laef1e9bn" xml:space="preserve">{{Wikiquote:Quote of the day/Template
| image1 = The Brazen Serpent, Mount Nebo.jpg
| image1px = 262px
| image2 = Walter Benjamin vers 1928.jpg
| image2px = 292px
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt;There is a [[secret]] agreement between [[past]] [[generations]] and the [[present]] one. Our coming was expected on [[earth]]. Like every generation that preceded us, we have been endowed with a weak [[Messianic]] [[power]], a power to which the past has a claim. That claim cannot be settled cheaply.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}</text>
      <sha1>af1dqq3qyeza39o7gncdx5laef1e9bn</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965132</id>
      <parentid>3965131</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:01:37Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kalki</username>
        <id>71</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <origin>3965132</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="528" sha1="1loqgfsi8xz50rlii6q5y1gkfrd3wc0" xml:space="preserve">{{Wikiquote:Quote of the day/Template
| image1 = The Brazen Serpent, Mount Nebo.jpg
| image1px = 262px
| image2 = Walter Benjamin vers 1928.jpg
| image2px = 292px
| quote = &lt;!-- ⨀ &lt;br /&gt; --&gt;There is a [[secret]] agreement between [[past]] [[generations]] and the [[present]] one. Our coming was expected on [[earth]]. Like every generation that preceded us, we have been endowed with a [[weak]] [[Messianic]] [[power]], a power to which the past has a claim. That claim cannot be settled cheaply.
| author = Walter Benjamin
}}</text>
      <sha1>1loqgfsi8xz50rlii6q5y1gkfrd3wc0</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Priscilla Isaacs</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309914</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965141</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:28:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965141</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1705" sha1="510bpjp17crf44nmocs9092q3pn4vfv" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Priscilla Isaacs}}''' is a South African politician serving as a Member of the Northern Cape Provincial Legislature for the Democratic Alliance (DA). She took office as a Member on 22 May 2019.[1] Isaacs was a PR councillor of the Dawid Kruiper Local Municipality, prior to her election to the provincial legislature.

== QUOTES ==
*We are [pleased] in all other districts except Lusaka. There were about three constituencies in Lusaka, Kanyama and Matero and the other one is Munali where we had issues,”
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/zambia-to-release-vote-results-thursday--130221813/158883.html]
*Some of our polling staff didn’t follow instructions, [they] did not sleep at the polling stations, did not verify the materials and as a result the polling stations opened late.”
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/zambia-to-release-vote-results-thursday--130221813/158883.html]
*“We worked very hard, we received our funding, we put everything in place [and] we got materials in place on time
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/zambia-to-release-vote-results-thursday--130221813/158883.html]
*The officers had no excuse not to be at their polling stations on time and be able to open on time,” said Isaacs. “I’m sure if the polling stations had opened on time in these areas where we had disturbances, we wouldn’t have had the disturbances that we had,”
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/zambia-to-release-vote-results-thursday--130221813/158883.html]
*We hope that we can meet our target of having the results [released] within 48 hours.
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/zambia-to-release-vote-results-thursday--130221813/158883.html]


== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>510bpjp17crf44nmocs9092q3pn4vfv</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Haseenabanu Ismail</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309915</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965142</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:31:51Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965142</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2034" sha1="h15pe0qs2l00n4jvx6ecsx5ur703ljg" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Haseenabanu Ismail}}''' (born 9 November 1969) is a South African politician of the Democratic Alliance who is serving as a member of the South African National Assembly since May 2019. Ismail was previously the councillor for ward 29 in the Ekurhuleni Metropolitan Municipality.

== Quotes ==
*I have been a community activist for years. I joined the Democratic Alliance in 2011. I was a branch chair for Ward 29 from 2011 to 2013. In September 2013 I served as PR Cllr in Ward 29 Ekurhuleni. In 2016 I won the election and served as Ward Cllr of Ward 29 in Ekurhuleni. In 2019 I became a Member of Parliament and to date serve in the National Assembly.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/get-know-mp-haseenabanu-ismail]
*My one goal is to bring Parliament closer to the people. I have served in many different portfolios at local government level and at National level I serve on the Portfolio Committee of Health- if we can stop the NHI - I think we will save South Africa from ruin. While we believe in Universal Healthcare for all the present Healthcare system is so fragmented that the NHI will not work
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/get-know-mp-haseenabanu-ismail]
*I have done oversight at many public hospitals and have found major infrastructure issues, shortage of staff , budget constraints, non- payment of suppliers, revelations of potential corruption and I have dealt with many of the entities and asked many questions to the Minister in this regard ( the holding of the Executive to account of the Department of Health ) - I hope this will encourage others to drive an equally strong narrative. There is often strong opposition to oversight, yet this is within the mandate of every public representative to hold the executive to account and to bring and highlight issues of Constituencies to Parliament so that solutions and recommendations that are beneficial for the people can be taken.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/get-know-mp-haseenabanu-ismail]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>h15pe0qs2l00n4jvx6ecsx5ur703ljg</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Lungiswa James</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309916</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965143</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:40:29Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965143</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2508" sha1="gasm9parzvqd3yo23yg3hwi76ckbsfa" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Lungiswa James}}''' is a South African politician from the Democratic Alliance (DA).

== Quotes ==
*Between 1976 and 1977 I had gone back to school but because of the youth uprising between those two years schools closed. In 1978 when I arrived in old crossroads I met the Black sash organisation which advised us on legal matters as we had illegally occupied that land. Black sash also established a clinic there. I got heavily involved in the structures that were concerned with community development of old crossroads. I left old crossroads in 1984 to move to Khayelitsha through forced removals by the community leader in that location at the time. Developmental work started in Khayelitsha when 18 families led by women from old crossroads started and at the time where I found work with the Quakers. They taught me developmental studies and as those women we started food gardens and crèches.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/ms-lungiswa-james-da]
*I accidentally met politics as I am from a family where sharing and caring was important together communal assistance. The driver of all this was my mother who was the pillar in our home unfortunately she died when I was 16. My mother was a staunch PAC member whereas my father was an ANC cadre therefore politic was there at home from that young age in Gugulethu, Cape Town for me. From Gugulethu I moved to old Crossroads with my two siblings after the death of our mother. At the time I was forced to leave Healdtown education at grade 11. When I returned to Cape Town I then worked in clothing factories around Cape Town Metro between 1975 and 1977 early. At the time I changed my name to N. Smith just to get employment as the government system of the day stratified employment according to skin colour. At one point I was also referred to as Angelina Abrahams to get work.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/ms-lungiswa-james-da]
*On Mondays and Friday I am at my constituency working with a ward councillor to address all the community issues were I have been deployed by the party. On Tuesday morning I am in parliament dealing with office administration so that in the afternoon I am in the House for plenaries. On Wednesday morning I am at committee where I have been seconded to the Portfolio Committee on Health and then plenary in the afternoon. On Thursday morning I am at my party caucus and then plenary in the afternoon.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/ms-lungiswa-james-da]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>gasm9parzvqd3yo23yg3hwi76ckbsfa</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Lydia Johnson</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309917</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965145</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:48:13Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965145</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2575" sha1="k6ijqwti64z9nbcmsqia2lw73oyaq7m" xml:space="preserve">
'''{{W|Lydia Johnson}}''' is a South African politician who represented the African National Congress (ANC) in the KwaZulu-Natal Legislature until 2019. She was the legislature's Speaker from 2013 to 2019 and previously served in the KwaZulu-Natal Executive Council between 2006 and 2011: she was KwaZulu-Natal's Member of the Executive Council (MEC) for Public Works from 2006 to 2009 and MEC for Agriculture, Environmental Affairs and Rural Development from 2009 to 2011. In June 2022, she was appointed board chairperson at Ezemvelo.

== Quotes ==
*I remember my mother, a banking professional and political activist, talking about her time working on campaigns of “strong women” throughout the late 80s and 90s. In her hometown of Cleveland, Ohio, she helped women get elected as district representatives, judges, and councilwomen. She would lament that she didn’t see the same dynamics in Georgia, and she was surprised that Georgia had so few women even running for office. Contributing to the election of women who looked like her and shared her background was some of the most meaningful work she’d done, but her daughter was growing up in a place that didn’t seem similar at all
**[https://www.herterm.org/blog/lydia-johnson]
*My experiences truly warranted her sentiments: even though I considered my preteen-self more politically aware than my average peer — meaning I was looking and paying attention — I still couldn’t find many examples of strong female political leaders. There was a framed photo of former Atlanta mayor, Mayor Shirley Franklin, in my church’s basement, and for most of my life, that was the pinnacle of women in politics to me. Outside of her presence, my understanding of Georgia’s political hierarchy was that it was very traditional, male, conservative, and status quo.
**[https://www.herterm.org/blog/lydia-johnson]
*The legacy of American politics thus far has been dictated by mostly men — a status quo culture that is reflected in our state and local governments as well. Yet, my entire adult life, albeit short, the polarized nature of U.S. politics has undoubtedly become more stark. The basic rights of Americans — life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness — are, amazingly, being reevaluated and reinterpreted as we speak. We are at the cusp of a tipping point, and, now more than ever, we should be looking for candidates and elected officials to act in our, the people’s, best interests.
**[https://www.herterm.org/blog/lydia-johnson]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>k6ijqwti64z9nbcmsqia2lw73oyaq7m</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sandy Kalyan</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309918</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965146</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T00:52:38Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965146</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1350" sha1="t2dlsua7swo9ovjh519d9p486u91566" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Sandy Kalyan}}''' (born 26 July 1957) is a South African politician, and a former Democratic Alliance member of Parliament's National Assembly, where she served as the Shadow Minister of Science and Technology until 2012.

== Quotes ==
*While serving my internship as a psychologist at UKZN, I became involved in lunch time discussions with students and staff and after having a conversation with Tony Leon, former leader of the DA, I was inspired to run for public office. I am a liberal democrat so the choice of the DA was automatic.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/sandy-kalyan]
*The Fifth Parliament has been a huge disappointment. Rules are broken on a daily basis, the decorum of the House has degenerated into chaos on may occasions and the use of force to eject MPs in a violent manner has brought the House into disrepute. Voters are watching Channel 408 for the “next episode” as though it is a &quot;soapie&quot;. This is most unfortunate.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/sandy-kalyan]
*Education and skills development. I believe that an education or a skill is the key to financial independence. Not everyone can be a doctor or a lawyer. We need to remember that the doctor or lawyer needs a hairdresser, plumber or an electrician.
**[https://www.pa.org.za/blog/sandy-kalyan]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>t2dlsua7swo9ovjh519d9p486u91566</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Quanita Adams</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309919</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965148</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:02:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965148</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3217" sha1="pfb9uktv28gfe5nhscjifg9kuqoaqi3" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Quanita Adams}}''' is a stage and screen actress living in Cape Town, South Africa. She has performed in the movies Forgiveness (2004, alongside Arnold Vosloo), Cape of Good Hope (2004) and Skeem (2011). She has appeared on stage in notable plays, including Truth in Translation and At Her Feet. She is the 2008 winner of the Fleur du Cap Theatre Award for Best Supporting Actress for her roles in Cissie, the 2004 winner of the Fleur du Cap Theatre Award for Best Actress for Valley Song and At Her Feet,[1] and the 2003 winner of the Fleur du Cap Theatre Award for Best Ensemble for For Colored Girls.[2][3] Quanita also plays the role of Mother Laetitia in the SAFTA-winning KykNET drama, Arendsvlei. Furthermore, Adams created the television series Riveiria, based on a grade 7 girl growing up during Apartheid, as well as Vinkel en Koljander.

== Quotes ==
*I don’t know that anything necessarily inspired me except [that] my parents encouraged me. They identified that, “If this child is going to be a fool, we might as well do as much as possible to support that.” I think growing up and being taken to theatre and to the Philharmonic orchestra and then seeing people onstage who kind of looked like me, made it possible. I didn’t start out wanting to be a performer. I studied Fine Art. I lasted two years at Michaelis and then we decided to consciously uncouple and my parents were like, “If you think you are going to be a varsity dropout after two years, think again.”
**[https://sarafinamagazine.com/2018/04/11/a-conversation-with-quanita-adams/]
*I don’t know about prodigy but I was just out there. I was just extra. I think that my parents, both of whom are incredibly talented in their own right, are both very artistic and they sing incredibly beautifully and are more dramatic than I could ever aspire to. I think I come from a family that was fairly encouraging of that. I studied Drama and then graduated and went off and sang in Mallorca for a year in a cover/ tribute girl band. Then I came back and did Honours. I suddenly realise that I’ve deviated from the question but I don’t know where I got my inspiration from. It just happened and then I was encouraged by my parents and then seeing people on stages and screens performing made me believe that it was possible to be a legitimate way to live ones life through one’s craft.
**[https://sarafinamagazine.com/2018/04/11/a-conversation-with-quanita-adams/]
*Honestly, I think I wasted it. I think the two years spent at Michaelis were so desperately unhappy that by the time I moved to Drama School, even though I knew everyone because we were all on the same campus together, suddenly I was two years older than the people in my class and I still had so much residual anger from my experience in Fine Arts that I kind of think I squandered a lot of the opportunities. I think I wasted it, if I’m honest. I think I didn’t go to any extra lengths to connect with any of my lecturers. Having said that, I was incredibly close to Yvonne Banning who has since passed away.
**[https://sarafinamagazine.com/2018/04/11/a-conversation-with-quanita-adams/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>pfb9uktv28gfe5nhscjifg9kuqoaqi3</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965149</id>
      <parentid>3965148</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:03:19Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965149</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3207" sha1="2syyjdx0515m8gpyp0gcqo5tbz8cr87" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Quanita Adams}}''' is a stage and screen actress living in Cape Town, South Africa. She has performed in the movies Forgiveness (2004, alongside Arnold Vosloo), Cape of Good Hope (2004) and Skeem (2011). She has appeared on stage in notable plays, including Truth in Translation and At Her Feet. She is the 2008 winner of the Fleur du Cap Theatre Award for Best Supporting Actress for her roles in Cissie, the 2004 winner of the Fleur du Cap Theatre Award for Best Actress for Valley Song and At Her Feet, and the 2003 winner of the Fleur du Cap Theatre Award for Best Ensemble for For Colored Girls.Quanita also plays the role of Mother Laetitia in the SAFTA-winning KykNET drama, Arendsvlei. Furthermore, Adams created the television series Riveiria, based on a grade 7 girl growing up during Apartheid, as well as Vinkel en Koljander.

== Quotes ==
*I don’t know that anything necessarily inspired me except [that] my parents encouraged me. They identified that, “If this child is going to be a fool, we might as well do as much as possible to support that.” I think growing up and being taken to theatre and to the Philharmonic orchestra and then seeing people onstage who kind of looked like me, made it possible. I didn’t start out wanting to be a performer. I studied Fine Art. I lasted two years at Michaelis and then we decided to consciously uncouple and my parents were like, “If you think you are going to be a varsity dropout after two years, think again.”
**[https://sarafinamagazine.com/2018/04/11/a-conversation-with-quanita-adams/]
*I don’t know about prodigy but I was just out there. I was just extra. I think that my parents, both of whom are incredibly talented in their own right, are both very artistic and they sing incredibly beautifully and are more dramatic than I could ever aspire to. I think I come from a family that was fairly encouraging of that. I studied Drama and then graduated and went off and sang in Mallorca for a year in a cover/ tribute girl band. Then I came back and did Honours. I suddenly realise that I’ve deviated from the question but I don’t know where I got my inspiration from. It just happened and then I was encouraged by my parents and then seeing people on stages and screens performing made me believe that it was possible to be a legitimate way to live ones life through one’s craft.
**[https://sarafinamagazine.com/2018/04/11/a-conversation-with-quanita-adams/]
*Honestly, I think I wasted it. I think the two years spent at Michaelis were so desperately unhappy that by the time I moved to Drama School, even though I knew everyone because we were all on the same campus together, suddenly I was two years older than the people in my class and I still had so much residual anger from my experience in Fine Arts that I kind of think I squandered a lot of the opportunities. I think I wasted it, if I’m honest. I think I didn’t go to any extra lengths to connect with any of my lecturers. Having said that, I was incredibly close to Yvonne Banning who has since passed away.
**[https://sarafinamagazine.com/2018/04/11/a-conversation-with-quanita-adams/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>2syyjdx0515m8gpyp0gcqo5tbz8cr87</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Anel Alexander</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309920</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965152</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:09:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965152</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1761" sha1="hsnpvqqhdx4y8tqe5icn86yoxsf3ila" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Anel Alexander}}''' (née Flett) is an actress and producer from Pretoria, South Africa.

== Quotes ==
*Marieke is the moral compass of the series. She’s a wife, mother and a gynaecologist, and like most people, her strongest characteristic ends up being her weakest as well. She is very caring and loyal and it is this loyalty to her best friend, Rachel (Carine Rous), that ends up getting her into trouble.”
**[https://capetimes.co.za/entertainment/tv/local/2020-08-30-anel-alexander-on-playing-marieke-meyer-the-moral-compass-in-m-nets-inconceivable/]
*A group of best friends are faced with some really tough moral dilemmas when one of them commits an inconceivable act.”
**[https://capetimes.co.za/entertainment/tv/local/2020-08-30-anel-alexander-on-playing-marieke-meyer-the-moral-compass-in-m-nets-inconceivable/]
*It’s very plot-driven, which I think is going to keep our viewers glued to their screens. It’s been a while since I’ve read a local script that kept me wanting for more at the end of every episode
**[https://capetimes.co.za/entertainment/tv/local/2020-08-30-anel-alexander-on-playing-marieke-meyer-the-moral-compass-in-m-nets-inconceivable/]
*Marieke and Rachel have a very deep, complicated friendship. It was forged as teenagers when Rachel’s mom unexpectedly passed away and Marieke kind of adopted Rachel as her little sister. Rachel, however, has a stronger personality, and always dominated the friendship. But Marieke was just glad to follow along and bask in some of ‘perfect’ Rachel’s glory.”
**[https://capetimes.co.za/entertainment/tv/local/2020-08-30-anel-alexander-on-playing-marieke-meyer-the-moral-compass-in-m-nets-inconceivable/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>hsnpvqqhdx4y8tqe5icn86yoxsf3ila</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Candice Boucher</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309921</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965154</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:15:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965154</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1589" sha1="rfv724ayn8yclneg59lzhr12erefkug" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Candice Boucher}}''' is a South African model and actress. In 2010, Boucher was on the cover of Playboy and Sports Illustrated. In 2011, she starred in the Bollywood film Aazaan.

== Quotes ==
*My parents have split, and both re-married. I have a brother and a half sister, who is very young. I have been on my own for the last 10 years. I grew up with my mom and visited my dad on weekends.
**[https://m.rediff.com/movies/slide-show/slide-show-1-interview-with-candice-boucher/20110923.htm]
*The first time I came to India was for the Liril ad six years ago. Then I did the Lee Jeans ad. I have met great people and have a great team. I always keep in touch with my Indian clients, they are all great people. I have come here many times but this is the first movie that has been offered to me.
**[https://m.rediff.com/movies/slide-show/slide-show-1-interview-with-candice-boucher/20110923.htm]
*I am a South African, born in Durban. For the last 10 years, I have been based in Cape Town. I started modelling in the last year of school. It involved lots of travelling and I enjoyed it, seeing and meeting lots of interesting people.
**[https://m.rediff.com/movies/slide-show/slide-show-1-interview-with-candice-boucher/20110923.htm]
*I have known Prashant for six years now and they had a part in the movie for a girl who is western and has a Mediterranean look. Prashant wrote the part keeping my personality in mind.
**[https://m.rediff.com/movies/slide-show/slide-show-1-interview-with-candice-boucher/20110923.htm]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>rfv724ayn8yclneg59lzhr12erefkug</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Judy Croome</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309922</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965157</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:29:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965157</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3110" sha1="pefxgzj6996yw5imb0u25msyqkopsif" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Judy Croome}}''' is a South African novelist, short story writer, and poet. Born Judy Ann Heinemann on 16 December 1958 in Zvishavane, Southern Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe), she received a Master of Arts (English) degree from the University of South Africa. She currently lives in Johannesburg. Croome was married to South African tax law scholar, Advocate of the High Court of South Africa and tax author, the late Dr Beric John Croome, who died in April 2019 after a long illness


== Quotes ==
*I think I fell into it. I wanted to write the next great novel. Of course, I think every writer wants to write the great novel. My personal circumstances were such that I didn’t have the time to dedicate [to writing]. My father was very ill. My mother needed help, she had a heart attack, my husband was with all sorts of things, so I was trying to balance all these things and I didn’t have time to do another novel. I thought, well, just write poems, at least you’re writing something. And somehow I discovered that I’m actually probably better at poems than I am at writing a novel because it suits my personality. The poem exists in and of itself, and its whole within itself, and I like that feeling of completeness when you finish the poem. That was when I realized I must focus on poetry, and that’s what I’ve done. 
**[https://sjuhawknews.com/26662/southafrica/south-african-poet-writes-to-change-perceptions/]
*That’s almost impossible to answer because there are so many poems that have moved me. As you grow as an individual, a poem that means something to you 10 years ago may have pushed you into a new experience, but when you look at it 10 years later, it doesn’t have the same resonance. The one that springs to mind now is “The Laughing Heart” by Charles Bukowski because it’s all about living life with passion and not letting the darkness of the world diminish you. “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver is also a beautiful one.
**[https://sjuhawknews.com/26662/southafrica/south-african-poet-writes-to-change-perceptions/]
*I love Toni Morrison’s style of writing. Although she’s talking about issues that are so important, she doesn’t do it from a role of victimhood, she does it from a role of power. She forces you into very uncomfortable – especially for me as a white South African – and really challenging things. That’s going back to what I was saying previously about how you want to change people by changing their perspectives. Works like Toni Morrison’s, Maya Angelou’s poems, Mary Oliver’s, Louise Erdrich’s novels, they inspire me by showing me different perspectives. They move me, they make me feel emotions, sometimes emotions that I don’t want to feel like guilt and shame. At the same time, it’s all part of human existence. If we don’t acknowledge those feelings, then we’re never going to move through them. We’re never going to change, we’re never going to grow.
**[https://sjuhawknews.com/26662/southafrica/south-african-poet-writes-to-change-perceptions/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>pefxgzj6996yw5imb0u25msyqkopsif</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Isobel Dixon</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309923</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965158</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:33:16Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965158</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1989" sha1="ffzx7d99c8iaykdbf98ayq6j8d188ch" xml:space="preserve">'''{{w|Isobel Dixon}}''' (born 1969) is a South African poet. She is also a literary agent based in London.

== Quotes ==
*I love nature writing of all kinds and it’s intriguing to see the animal world represented through the ages, from Aesop to Bishop. I look forward to exploring some of these on my ‘Twilight of the Iguana’ Summer School Workshop on Friday 25 July – the title is a reference to the opening line of Pablo Neruda’s ‘Some Beasts’ and we’ll be looking at Ted Hughes and Mark Doty and more, but most of all finding some time and space and inspiration for participants to tackle new work.
**[https://poetryschool.com/uncategorized/twilight-of-the-iguana-interview-with-isobel-dixon/]
*The natural world is a continuing obsession in my work. My last collection The Tempest Prognosticator is teeming with creatures from life and art – from the energetic toktokkie beetle to Damien Hirst’s pickled shark, from Henri Rousseau’s ‘Merry Jester’ apes in their lush jungle, to the poor confused whale that swam up the Thames. I’m currently working with the artist Doug Robertson on a project in which we both respond to D H Lawrence’s Birds, Beasts and Flowers, so snakes, bats, tortoises et al remain much on my mind.
**[https://poetryschool.com/uncategorized/twilight-of-the-iguana-interview-with-isobel-dixon/]
*Ha, travel breaks the bank/back (I dream of being a lighter traveller)? Broadens the hips (if you love Rome and its culinary delights, for instance)? Actually, I’d love a little more of the mind-broadening that goes with sitting quietly at home at my desk. I travel a lot though, for work and pleasure, and it does get the mind buzzing. Lots of useful notes for later work. I have a poem sequence on the simmer called ‘Travel Snap Quartets’ – we’ll see where that goes.
**[https://poetryschool.com/uncategorized/twilight-of-the-iguana-interview-with-isobel-dixon/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>ffzx7d99c8iaykdbf98ayq6j8d188ch</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Rozena Maart</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309924</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965160</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:39:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965160</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2164" sha1="rfmkacl61squwa8ewwrl6suqgxccsbr" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Rozena Maart}}''' (born 1962) is a South African writer, and professor, currently living in Durban. She is the Director for the Centre for Critical Research on Race and Identity. She has been recognized for her writing, and for her work opposing apartheid and violence against women. She has lectured throughout Canada, the United States and many parts of the world.

== Quotes ==
*I met Louis-Georges Tin in 2006 when he spoke at the Dissidence conference organised by Jean-Paul Rocchi at Paris-Diderot University. Later as we sat down it became very clear to me that whilst many scholars talk about Black Consciousness as a philosophy and as a politics, a way of being in the world for existentialists, some or all of which are acquired as a result of how Black Consciousness as a movement developed within their environment and their engagement with it, Louis-Georges Tin had brought Black Consciousness to a moment of actualisation – and those who stood in its way, to a moment of reckoning.
**[https://quaderna.org/3/entretien-louis-georges-tin-rozena-maart/]
*In the case of the former, he asked very particular questions of the Négritude movement, which the French claim as theirs when it suits them and when it brings esteem to their cultural life but which was actually started by two men from the Caribbean – Aimé Césaire, from Martinique and Léon Gontran Damas, from Guyana – and one man from Africa, from Senegal, Léopold Sédar Senghor.
**[https://quaderna.org/3/entretien-louis-georges-tin-rozena-maart/]
*This is a huge responsibility. I am sure you will take CRAN even further. I want to come back to that later because I have a lot of questions about CRAN, which I never got to ask you about when we first met. When I first met you we talked after your presentation at the Dissidence conference and we shared our stories of arrest. Well it seems that each time we meet you have yet another arrest on your CV. I heard about what happened in Moscow? Can you tell me a little bit about that history?
**[https://quaderna.org/3/entretien-louis-georges-tin-rozena-maart/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>rfmkacl61squwa8ewwrl6suqgxccsbr</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Karin Schimke</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309925</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965161</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:45:57Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965161</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1876" sha1="p6kd5as03347iek0okc5zfni8yo2eti" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Karin Schimke}}''' (born 1968) is a South African writer. She has won awards for her poetry and literary translations. She works as a writer and editor.

== Quotes ==
*Last year, I was unexpectedly in Greece. On one of those days, floating in the warm water, I wondered why I didn’t live like this more. Travel has always felt beyond my means, but I’m a freelance writer, editor and translator, so in theory I could live and work anywhere I want. The notion took hold, in spite of all the reasons why it should be impossible, and I pursued ways of living a less structured, planned and predictable life for a few months.
**[https://www.litnet.co.za/karin-schimkes-gap-year-an-interview/]
*There are many years, if you’re lucky, between when your children are grown and death, and I wanted to travel while I could still walk with ease. No matter how we look after ourselves, our bodies start getting a bit crock at a certain age, and I wanted to expend all my restlessness while my knees and hips are still feeling well oiled.
**[https://www.litnet.co.za/karin-schimkes-gap-year-an-interview/]
*So many! Berlin feels fantastically foreign from the life I know, and yet familiar from my four previous family trips here. I revel in the smell that hits you when you descend into the U-Bahn, in the cadences of friendliness in the language, and in the quality of the beer and the Brötchen. And in the absolute joy of walking as a means of travel, not just leisure. I finally understand now what it means to “live in the moment” and that, although it’s sometimes uncomfortable, I can live without my beloved books and only two pairs of shoes. I’ve experienced a deeper level of “living lightly”. Minimalism has been liberating.
**[https://www.litnet.co.za/karin-schimkes-gap-year-an-interview/]
== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]</text>
      <sha1>p6kd5as03347iek0okc5zfni8yo2eti</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Toni Stuart</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309926</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965162</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:48:50Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965162</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1686" sha1="mt8e1ksyob3n564fuojm54e65qsss3s" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Toni Stuart}}''' (born 21 January 1983) is a South African poet best known for her poetry writing and performances. She has stated that she aims to encourage others to find their own voice by offering inspirational creative workshops

== Quotes ==
*For me, being a poet, is not only the act of sitting down to write, it’s a way of being in the world, and a way of engaging with the world. Taking my poetry into these different spaces is another way of doing that: engaging with a range of people, from all kinds of communities. Before I was a “full-time” poet, I worked in the youth development sector, and before that I was a journalist. Throughout my life I’ve engaged with different communities and spaces, people from all walks of life
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/05/23/qa-with-toni-stuart-poetry-gives-people-the-power-to-make-their-voices-heard/]
*We can’t live and work in silos – we have to be finding new spaces, in order to keep learning, keep being challenged and keep creating. Taking my work into diverse spaces allows me to do that.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/05/23/qa-with-toni-stuart-poetry-gives-people-the-power-to-make-their-voices-heard/]
*Also, poetry like all forms of art, is needed and relevant everywhere. It is as relevant in an academic setting as it is as a poetry festival or a political rally. Wherever people find themselves, when they experience poetry, it awakens something in them, it touches them, it moves them, it makes them feel alive.
**[https://africainwords.com/2016/05/23/qa-with-toni-stuart-poetry-gives-people-the-power-to-make-their-voices-heard/]
== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]</text>
      <sha1>mt8e1ksyob3n564fuojm54e65qsss3s</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Xabiso Vili</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309927</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965163</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:52:03Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965163</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2961" sha1="n0ur7uu86swee7sn4les8uh8cjk98f2" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Xabiso Vili}}''' is a South African poet, new media artist, author, and speaker who has performed his poetry nationally and internationally. He earned the title of World Slam Poetry Champion in Brussels in 2022.[1] He is also noted for his poetry, which has been published in various anthologies, and his interactive multi-media projects. Owing to the work he has done in the arts sector of South Africa, he was named one of the Mail &amp; Guardian 200 Young South Africans in 2022.
== Quotes ==
*Solving for X is an abstraction, logical thinking that allows one to reach a set of possibilities. X can be anything. It can be Phat Boi. But it could also be thin Boi and fold itself in a poem that wins slams. X could be a eulogy. Buried. And questioning why some people spell tired as suicide. X can be a kingdom of scars, a Love letter to Gaza or Black boi be during a Black Lives matter March. X could be broken. But fixed with gold. Most importantly X needs to be found.
**[https://medium.com/@shadrackmasilela/solving-for-x-a-conversation-with-xabiso-vili-9229363a8dfc]
*I think I am slowly settling on therapy. Just because the concept of therapy itself, is so versatile. It encompasses healing but also encourages meaningful action towards change. Both for the personal and for the external and community. I’ve always said that this art form helps me make sense of my internal world to be able to relate to the external world and vice versa. But now, I have been able to take it a step further and do that for other people. Look, I am an an artist – and I am always looking at how to expand and improve upon my art, but I think Siphokazi Jonas mentioned in one of your chats, that she is focussed on process rather than outcome or product. And that has been really important for me as well. In my writing and the workshops I run, it’s all good and well to leave with a “dope” piece, but what did we learn during the process, what did we change, what did we tackle? And I really think a more involved process makes for better art but this art is just a tool to make better humans.
**[https://medium.com/@shadrackmasilela/solving-for-x-a-conversation-with-xabiso-vili-9229363a8dfc]
*Is staying away from any thoughts of the next day’s show. I like to give myself a buffer. SO I have probably spent the week or two before (depending on how big the show is) memorising poems, finding the mood and the character and living in the poems. So, the day before, I trust that I know what I am going to do – so I don’t do anything, just so I can keep the pieces fresh for myself. So I am doing anything that distracts me from the show and when I get to the venue the next day, I step into the poems and character(s) I’ve created like I am meeting old friends for the first time again.
**[https://medium.com/@shadrackmasilela/solving-for-x-a-conversation-with-xabiso-vili-9229363a8dfc]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]</text>
      <sha1>n0ur7uu86swee7sn4les8uh8cjk98f2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Jo-Anne Richards</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309928</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965164</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T01:54:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965164</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1536" sha1="qcpwt6rxq6pk0wru84cd4dn0gx001ky" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Jo-Anne Richards}}''' is a South African journalist and author

== Quotes ==
*Ideal? Hell, in a country where so few people read, any reader is ideal. Obviously I’d prefer a reader who buys their own copy. It helps. Oh, and I love bookclub readers — they keep writers afloat. Apart from that, anyone who reads with interest and an open mind is a great reader.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]
*I’m working on a fifth novel. While I’m working on something, I can’t really give too many details, but it’s about family; about mothers and daughters and flawed people in difficult relationships.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]
*Everyday? What luxury. I have a day job (and a night job — I teach writing classes in the evenings). I have to squeeze everything to accommodate my writing. I write best when I’ve been at it an hour or two, so the odd half-hour doesn’t do it for me. When all goes well, I try to write for a morning. Sometimes I might even manage two mornings.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]
*I hate this question because the instant I’ve finished writing this, I’ll remember countless important books that escape me right now. I’ve always felt perhaps I ought to make up some obscure, deeply intellectual tome to make myself sound clever.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]</text>
      <sha1>qcpwt6rxq6pk0wru84cd4dn0gx001ky</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965166</id>
      <parentid>3965164</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:16:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Evaristus07</username>
        <id>3154104</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965166</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1537" sha1="8kxqzppgkmwz28faeo8vueupcn6dmf8" xml:space="preserve">'''{{W|Jo-Anne Richards}}''' is a South African journalist and author

== Quotes ==
*Ideal? Hell, in a country where so few people read, any reader is ideal. Obviously I’d prefer a reader who buys their own copy. It helps. Oh, and I love bookclub readers — they keep writers afloat. Apart from that, anyone who reads with interest and an open mind is a great reader.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]
*I’m working on a fifth novel. While I’m working on something, I can’t really give too many details, but it’s about family; about mothers and daughters and flawed people in difficult relationships.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]
*Everyday? What luxury. I have a day job (and a night job — I teach writing classes in the evenings). I have to squeeze everything to accommodate my writing. I write best when I’ve been at it an hour or two, so the odd half-hour doesn’t do it for me. When all goes well, I try to write for a morning. Sometimes I might even manage two mornings.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]
*I hate this question because the instant I’ve finished writing this, I’ll remember countless important books that escape me right now. I’ve always felt perhaps I ought to make up some obscure, deeply intellectual tome to make myself sound clever.
**[https://mg.co.za/friday/2009-12-02-talking-authors-jo-anne-richards/]

== External links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]</text>
      <sha1>8kxqzppgkmwz28faeo8vueupcn6dmf8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309929</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965176</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:48:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;The '''{{w|Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress}}''' is the People's Republic of China's guiding legislation concerning ethnic minorities. The law was introduced by the National People's Congress (NPC)'s Ethnic Affairs Committee and submitted to the NPC on 8 September 2025. It was signed into law on 12 March 2026 and enacted on 1 July 2026. The law codifies CCP general secretary Xi Jinping's policies regarding the sinicization of ethnic minorities. The law has been...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965176</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2212" sha1="fuyde64uh69epsflke72gas1m20qcqa" xml:space="preserve">The '''{{w|Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress}}''' is the People's Republic of China's guiding legislation concerning ethnic minorities. The law was introduced by the National People's Congress (NPC)'s Ethnic Affairs Committee and submitted to the NPC on 8 September 2025. It was signed into law on 12 March 2026 and enacted on 1 July 2026. The law codifies CCP general secretary Xi Jinping's policies regarding the sinicization of ethnic minorities. The law has been widely criticized by scholars, the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, multiple governments, former United Nations special rapporteurs, and human rights activists outside of China. The law's promotion of extraterritorial enforcement has been likened to transnational repression.

==Quotes==
* Lobga Rangzen demonstrated an extraordinary example of devotion and loyalty to his people and homeland—a depth of love that many in the world may never truly comprehend. He connected his sacrifice with the obnoxious “Ethnic Unity Law” enforced by China since July 1, which is nothing but a sinister tool for forced assimilation and cultural genocide. This law does not merely aim to erase the souls of the captive nations under Chinese occupation to forge a single, homogenous Chinese identity; it is also designed to dismantle democratic forces abroad that resist Beijing’s tyranny.&lt;br&gt;… We know all too well the bloody reality behind the “Ethnic Unity Law” that the Chinese government enacted on July 1. What [the Communist Party of] China calls “unity” is, in truth, forced assimilation and the total eradication of a nation’s identity. It is precisely this destructive policy of the Chinese regime that drove Tibet’s heroic son, Lobga Rangzen, to make the ultimate sacrifice. The flames that rose from his body are the most powerful rejection of the Chinese government, shattering the world’s complicit silence in defense of human dignity.
** Abdurehim Gheni Uyghur, [https://bitterwinter.org/what-lobga-rangzens-self-immolation-in-new-york-tells-the-uyghurs/ &quot;What Lobga Rangzen’s Self-Immolation in New York Tells the Uyghurs&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 14, 2026)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>fuyde64uh69epsflke72gas1m20qcqa</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965178</id>
      <parentid>3965176</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:48:57Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <minor />
      <comment>added [[Category:China]] using [[Help:Gadget-HotCat|HotCat]]</comment>
      <origin>3965178</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2232" sha1="jsoppekdsv1siqey2gn48s2bmd3meo6" xml:space="preserve">The '''{{w|Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress}}''' is the People's Republic of China's guiding legislation concerning ethnic minorities. The law was introduced by the National People's Congress (NPC)'s Ethnic Affairs Committee and submitted to the NPC on 8 September 2025. It was signed into law on 12 March 2026 and enacted on 1 July 2026. The law codifies CCP general secretary Xi Jinping's policies regarding the sinicization of ethnic minorities. The law has been widely criticized by scholars, the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, multiple governments, former United Nations special rapporteurs, and human rights activists outside of China. The law's promotion of extraterritorial enforcement has been likened to transnational repression.

==Quotes==
* Lobga Rangzen demonstrated an extraordinary example of devotion and loyalty to his people and homeland—a depth of love that many in the world may never truly comprehend. He connected his sacrifice with the obnoxious “Ethnic Unity Law” enforced by China since July 1, which is nothing but a sinister tool for forced assimilation and cultural genocide. This law does not merely aim to erase the souls of the captive nations under Chinese occupation to forge a single, homogenous Chinese identity; it is also designed to dismantle democratic forces abroad that resist Beijing’s tyranny.&lt;br&gt;… We know all too well the bloody reality behind the “Ethnic Unity Law” that the Chinese government enacted on July 1. What [the Communist Party of] China calls “unity” is, in truth, forced assimilation and the total eradication of a nation’s identity. It is precisely this destructive policy of the Chinese regime that drove Tibet’s heroic son, Lobga Rangzen, to make the ultimate sacrifice. The flames that rose from his body are the most powerful rejection of the Chinese government, shattering the world’s complicit silence in defense of human dignity.
** Abdurehim Gheni Uyghur, [https://bitterwinter.org/what-lobga-rangzens-self-immolation-in-new-york-tells-the-uyghurs/ &quot;What Lobga Rangzen’s Self-Immolation in New York Tells the Uyghurs&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 14, 2026)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:China]]</text>
      <sha1>jsoppekdsv1siqey2gn48s2bmd3meo6</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965179</id>
      <parentid>3965178</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:53:17Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965179</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2238" sha1="sf1kvorbcto6yftfhnerrqh723jkxar" xml:space="preserve">The '''{{w|Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress}}''' is the People's Republic of China's guiding legislation concerning ethnic minorities. The law was introduced by the National People's Congress (NPC)'s Ethnic Affairs Committee and submitted to the NPC on 8 September 2025. It was signed into law on 12 March 2026 and enacted on 1 July 2026. The law codifies CCP general secretary Xi Jinping's policies regarding the sinicization of ethnic minorities. The law has been widely criticized by scholars, the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, multiple governments, former United Nations special rapporteurs, and human rights activists outside of China. The law's promotion of extraterritorial enforcement has been likened to {{w|transnational repression}}.

==Quotes==
* Lobga Rangzen demonstrated an extraordinary example of devotion and loyalty to his people and homeland—a depth of love that many in the world may never truly comprehend. He connected his sacrifice with the obnoxious “Ethnic Unity Law” enforced by China since July 1, which is nothing but a sinister tool for forced assimilation and cultural genocide. This law does not merely aim to erase the souls of the captive nations under Chinese occupation to forge a single, homogenous Chinese identity; it is also designed to dismantle democratic forces abroad that resist Beijing’s tyranny.&lt;br&gt;… We know all too well the bloody reality behind the “Ethnic Unity Law” that the Chinese government enacted on July 1. What [the Communist Party of] China calls “unity” is, in truth, forced assimilation and the total eradication of a nation’s identity. It is precisely this destructive policy of the Chinese regime that drove Tibet’s heroic son, Lobga Rangzen, to make the ultimate sacrifice. The flames that rose from his body are the most powerful rejection of the Chinese government, shattering the world’s complicit silence in defense of human dignity.
** Abdurehim Gheni Uyghur, [https://bitterwinter.org/what-lobga-rangzens-self-immolation-in-new-york-tells-the-uyghurs/ &quot;What Lobga Rangzen’s Self-Immolation in New York Tells the Uyghurs&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 14, 2026)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:China]]</text>
      <sha1>sf1kvorbcto6yftfhnerrqh723jkxar</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965180</id>
      <parentid>3965179</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:55:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965180</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2253" sha1="5yxczg63w9tm301e2pz3j80a1fcodi8" xml:space="preserve">The '''{{w|Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress}}''' is the People's Republic of China's guiding legislation concerning ethnic minorities. The law was introduced by the National People's Congress (NPC)'s Ethnic Affairs Committee and submitted to the NPC on 8 September 2025. It was signed into law on 12 March 2026 and enacted on 1 July 2026. The law codifies CCP general secretary [[Xi Jinping|Xi Jinping's]] policies regarding the sinicization of ethnic minorities. The law has been widely criticized by scholars, the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, multiple governments, former United Nations special rapporteurs, and human rights activists outside of China. The law's promotion of extraterritorial enforcement has been likened to {{w|transnational repression}}.

==Quotes==
* Lobga Rangzen demonstrated an extraordinary example of devotion and loyalty to his people and homeland—a depth of love that many in the world may never truly comprehend. He connected his sacrifice with the obnoxious “Ethnic Unity Law” enforced by China since July 1, which is nothing but a sinister tool for forced assimilation and cultural genocide. This law does not merely aim to erase the souls of the captive nations under Chinese occupation to forge a single, homogenous Chinese identity; it is also designed to dismantle democratic forces abroad that resist Beijing’s tyranny.&lt;br&gt;… We know all too well the bloody reality behind the “Ethnic Unity Law” that the Chinese government enacted on July 1. What [the Communist Party of] China calls “unity” is, in truth, forced assimilation and the total eradication of a nation’s identity. It is precisely this destructive policy of the Chinese regime that drove Tibet’s heroic son, Lobga Rangzen, to make the ultimate sacrifice. The flames that rose from his body are the most powerful rejection of the Chinese government, shattering the world’s complicit silence in defense of human dignity.
** Abdurehim Gheni Uyghur, [https://bitterwinter.org/what-lobga-rangzens-self-immolation-in-new-york-tells-the-uyghurs/ &quot;What Lobga Rangzen’s Self-Immolation in New York Tells the Uyghurs&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 14, 2026)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:China]]</text>
      <sha1>5yxczg63w9tm301e2pz3j80a1fcodi8</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965181</id>
      <parentid>3965180</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T02:55:59Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Apisite</username>
        <id>3043558</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965181</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2257" sha1="qnj2wkf56xwxyfje336c86htzhx2v9m" xml:space="preserve">The '''{{w|Law on Promoting Ethnic Unity and Progress}}''' is the People's Republic of China's guiding legislation concerning ethnic minorities. The law was introduced by the National People's Congress (NPC)'s Ethnic Affairs Committee and submitted to the NPC on 8 September 2025. It was signed into law on 12 March 2026 and enacted on 1 July 2026. The law codifies CCP general secretary [[Xi Jinping|Xi Jinping's]] policies regarding the sinicization of ethnic minorities. The law has been widely criticized by scholars, the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, multiple governments, former United Nations special rapporteurs, and human rights activists outside of [[China]]. The law's promotion of extraterritorial enforcement has been likened to {{w|transnational repression}}.

==Quotes==
* Lobga Rangzen demonstrated an extraordinary example of devotion and loyalty to his people and homeland—a depth of love that many in the world may never truly comprehend. He connected his sacrifice with the obnoxious “Ethnic Unity Law” enforced by China since July 1, which is nothing but a sinister tool for forced assimilation and cultural genocide. This law does not merely aim to erase the souls of the captive nations under Chinese occupation to forge a single, homogenous Chinese identity; it is also designed to dismantle democratic forces abroad that resist Beijing’s tyranny.&lt;br&gt;… We know all too well the bloody reality behind the “Ethnic Unity Law” that the Chinese government enacted on July 1. What [the Communist Party of] China calls “unity” is, in truth, forced assimilation and the total eradication of a nation’s identity. It is precisely this destructive policy of the Chinese regime that drove Tibet’s heroic son, Lobga Rangzen, to make the ultimate sacrifice. The flames that rose from his body are the most powerful rejection of the Chinese government, shattering the world’s complicit silence in defense of human dignity.
** Abdurehim Gheni Uyghur, [https://bitterwinter.org/what-lobga-rangzens-self-immolation-in-new-york-tells-the-uyghurs/ &quot;What Lobga Rangzen’s Self-Immolation in New York Tells the Uyghurs&quot;], ''Bitter Winter'' (July 14, 2026)

==External links==
{{wikipedia}}

[[Category:China]]</text>
      <sha1>qnj2wkf56xwxyfje336c86htzhx2v9m</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>User:Another Wiki User the 3rd</title>
    <ns>2</ns>
    <id>309930</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965183</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T03:03:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Another Wiki User the 3rd</username>
        <id>3203150</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Russell M. Nelson|This link is for my personal convenience]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965183</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="62" sha1="5xa62ony1v1vl8h28f8j3uixijv3juw" xml:space="preserve">[[Russell M. Nelson|This link is for my personal convenience]]</text>
      <sha1>5xa62ony1v1vl8h28f8j3uixijv3juw</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Frene Ginwala</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309931</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965193</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T05:46:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3965193</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1476" sha1="3esz79x1yu7jy7lzvoz8ic0k1yoixsy" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Frene Noshir Ginwala|Frene Noshir Ginwala]]''' (25 April 1932 – 12 January 2023) was a South African journalist and politician who was the first speaker of the National Assembly of South Africa from 1994 to 2004. She was influential in the writing of the Constitution of South Africa and an important figure in establishing democracy in South Africa.

== Quotes ==
*Parliament is televised and people will watch it, and if they can see their leaders sitting in parliament there will be an identification.
**[https://www.nelsonmandela.org/news/entry/in-conversation-with-dr-frene-ginwala] Ginwale said this at an interview.

*I’m not, I’m accountable to parliament and to the South African public.
**[https://www.nelsonmandela.org/news/entry/in-conversation-with-dr-frene-ginwala] Ginwale said this at her interview with the Nelson Mandela Foundation.

*I am ashamed of the poverty around us, the growing difference between rich and poor and the despair that leads people to tear down and burn what little they have.
**[https://ndabaonline.ukzn.ac.za/UkzndabaStory/NdabaOnline-Vol1-Issue15/Ginwala%20Reflects%20on%20SA%20Society%20Today%20During%20Lecture%20at%20UKZN/] Ginwale said this During a Lecture at UKZN

*A case of one step forward and two steps backward.
**[https://ndabaonline.ukzn.ac.za/UkzndabaStory/NdabaOnline-Vol1-Issue15/Ginwala%20Reflects%20on%20SA%20Society%20Today%20During%20Lecture%20at%20UKZN/] She said this during a During Lecture at UKZN</text>
      <sha1>3esz79x1yu7jy7lzvoz8ic0k1yoixsy</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Toyin Ajaol</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309933</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965198</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:29:10Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3965198</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2015" sha1="o9vps68go6qa3io377es9arlyc1zi4y" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Toyin Ajao|Toyin Ajao]]''' (born 13 July 1978) is a Nigerian scholar, feminist activist, and healing researcher-practitioner whose work focuses on restorative healing, conflict transformation, and Afro-feminist approaches to social change.

*I am letting this truth slowly marinate into my nervous system as I continue showing up in the world.
**[https://drtoyinajao.medium.com/one-day-i-will-write-about-my-camera-flight-and-freeze-moments-e9ef3709c5bd]

*That I have what it takes to face the camera and not be fazed by it.
**[https://drtoyinajao.medium.com/one-day-i-will-write-about-my-camera-flight-and-freeze-moments-e9ef3709c5bd]

*The heightened security problems in our country hinge on self-interest and communal disconnection, whereby we have forgotten our collective responsibility, communal accountability, reciprocity, and compassion
**[https://punchng.com/uk-based-expert-calls-for-community-centred-empathy/] Toyin said this during an interview with punch newspaper 

*We are too polarised to embrace our collective humanity, and tap into our ancestral knowledge and wisdom to restore our sense of unity, dignity, mutual respect and integrity
**[https://punchng.com/uk-based-expert-calls-for-community-centred-empathy/] Toyin said this during an interview with punch newspaper

*If we don’t address these continued disconnections, warring, violence, chaos, and lack of concern for one another by healing ourselves, we will simply continue to sink deeper into the abyss of collective destruction.
**[https://punchng.com/uk-based-expert-calls-for-community-centred-empathy/] Toyin said this during an interview with punch newspaper

*I believe we are yet to heal from the colonial legacy, to channel our energy towards inter-dependency and communality.
**[https://punchng.com/uk-based-expert-calls-for-community-centred-empathy/] Toyin said this during an interview with punch newspaper

== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:Women]]
[[Category:Nigerians]]</text>
      <sha1>o9vps68go6qa3io377es9arlyc1zi4y</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Kwame Dawes</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309934</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965199</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:34:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965199</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4644" sha1="0z32qr7nnyw5uw3gpk2ua0aqbznws7p" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Kwame Senu Neville Dawes CD|Kwame Senu Neville Dawes CD]]'''(born 28 July 1962) is a Ghanaian poet, academic, critic, actor, and musician. He is the former Louis Frye Scudder Professor of Liberal Arts at the University of South Carolina and former Professor of English at the University of Nebraska–Lincoln. He was appointed Professor of Literary Arts at Brown University in 2024. He is series editor of the African Poetry Book Series and director of the African Poetry Book Fund. He was editor-in-chief at Prairie Schooner magazine from 2011 until 2025. He has published thirty books of poetry, as well as works of fiction, essays, and criticism. His awards include the Forward Poetry Prize, the Commonwealth Writers Prize, a 2009 Emmy Award, the Barnes &amp; Noble Writers for Writers Award, Brittle Paper's literary person of the year award, the Windham-Campbell Prize in 2019, and the National Books Critics Circle Award for Poetry in 2025. He is a Chancellor Emeritus of the Academy of American Poets and a Fellow of the Royal Society of Literature. In April 2024, Dawes was announced as the new Poet Laureate of Jamaica.
==Quotes==
*I am listening to the wind,
to the voice in the wind telling me
to write it all dow
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin.]
*If you wait long enough, all murders
will have lost their scream, all bloodlines
forgotten, all dynamite broken, all storms
settled, all bones cleaned of the memory of sin.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin]
*A lot of people say they want to leave this city to go somewhere else. Not me. I love this place for what it is. Ugly and pretty. Rough and tender. Chaotic and smooth. Loving and murderous. All of it.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin]
*I am a tornado child.
I come like a swirl of black and darken up your day;
I whip it all into my womb, lift you and your things,
carry you to where you’ve never been, and maybe,
if I feel good, I might bring you back, all warm and scared,
heart humming wild like a bird after early sudden flight.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin]
*What has been
taken from you,
it is this that
owns you, and
you, shell of all
joy, must walk
through this city
as beautiful as
the last summer
flowers.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin]
*Yes, I am a fat man, but don't sorry for me. In Jamaica a woman like a big man. She can see he is prosperous, and that he can be in charge. People call you &quot;boss&quot; before they even know who you are. &quot;Big man,&quot; &quot;Boss,&quot; &quot;Officer,&quot; &quot;King,&quot; and my favorite, &quot;My Lord.&quot; When a woman call you, &quot;My Lord,&quot; that is a sweetness.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin]
*you cross me at your peril, I swallow light
when the warm of anger lashes me into a spin,
the pine trees bend to me swept in my gyrations.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/186771.Kwame_Dawes#:~:text=If%20you%20wait%20long%20enough%2C,of%20the%20memory%20of%20sin]
*All memory is fiction.
* I think writers block is something writers invented to blame something other than the lack of things to say for our failure to write. 
**[https://www.writingclasses.com/toolbox/author-q-a/kwame-dawes?page=2#:~:text=What%20is%20your%20method%20for,overcoming%20writer's%20block%3F&amp;text=What%20are%20your%20favorite%20or,most%20helpful%20writing%20prompts%3F&amp;text=What%20is%20the%20most%20valuable,received%20as%20a%20young%20writer%3F]
*Responding to art—paintings, sculptures, etc. Writing poems in response to other poems on the white space in a book of poems. Inventing a form and then writing poems in that form for as long as I can stand it. A crown of sonnets. Challenging my language by trying to describe simple but quite difficult things: a taste, a smell, and feeling, in language that is precise and effective.
**[https://www.writingclasses.com/toolbox/author-q-a/kwame-dawes?page=2#:~:text=What%20is%20your%20method%20for,overcoming%20writer's%20block%3F&amp;text=What%20are%20your%20favorite%20or,most%20helpful%20writing%20prompts%3F&amp;text=What%20is%20the%20most%20valuable,received%20as%20a%20young%20writer%3F]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>0z32qr7nnyw5uw3gpk2ua0aqbznws7p</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Lawrence Darmani</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309935</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965203</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T06:50:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965203</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3626" sha1="mdlz3c8hg416d0jr5ijqpeh7z11yu4j" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Lawrence Darmani|Lawrence Darmani]]''' is a Ghanaian novelist, poet, and publisher. His first novel, Grief Child which was written in the year 1991,won the Commonwealth Writers' Prize as the best first book from Africa in 1992.
He also writes devotional articles for Our Daily Bread,[which touches the lives of many Christians around the world. He fellowships with the Presbyterian Church of Ghana.
He is the editor of Step magazine and CEO of Step Publishers. He is married with two daughters and lives in Accra.
==Quotes==
*No matter who you are– an administrator, a driver, a pastor–it is possible for God to call you into Christian writing, because God wants to use books to reach many people, in places where we ourselves cannot reach. And in times when we cannot say anything, what we have written can communicate.”
**[https://maiglobal.org/how-to-be-an-effective-and-impactful-christian-writer-with-lawrence-darmani/God can call anyone to write]
*We seek to produce quality work. We want to be effective writers…. The fact that we are Christians should propel us to write effectively because God demands diligence and excellence…. I pray that for us whom the Lord has called to write that we would feel it within our souls to write effectively.”
**[https://maiglobal.org/how-to-be-an-effective-and-impactful-christian-writer-with-lawrence-darmani/Seek diligence and excellence]
*If God’s called you to be a writer, you want to discuss your writing with God all the time and commit your writing to God…. While you work, remember who you are. You are writing for the King. There is no substitute for persistence, diligence, hard work and never giving up. It’s a message I’d love to have ringing in our ears every day.”
**[https://maiglobal.org/how-to-be-an-effective-and-impactful-christian-writer-with-lawrence-darmani/]
*Take a stand in your writing. Make your views strong. State your opinion passionately. Readers have questions and issues, and they anticipate your writing will provide guidance and help. God calls people to write to endow us with revelation and to touch many people’s hearts with what we write.”
**[https://maiglobal.org/how-to-be-an-effective-and-impactful-christian-writer-with-lawrence-darmani/ He talks about take a stand in your writing.]
*We write little by little, piece by piece, day by day. I’ve heard a lot of people say, ‘When I retire I will have a lot of time to write,’ but simply having time on your hands doesn’t guarantee you’ll produce. It’s a matter of doing it bit by bit…. Every day new ideas grow; you cannot have all of them at the same time.”
*
**[https://maiglobal.org/how-to-be-an-effective-and-impactful-christian-writer-with-lawrence-darmani/ He talks about writing bit by bit]
*It is a contradiction of terms to say you are a writer and yet you are not reading. Because if you’re not reading, how are you able to generate enough ideas for what you’re writing?…. I still enjoy reading, I have a library full of books and I love sharing my books with other people–although sometimes they don’t come back but that’s OK, the books are out there.”
**[https://maiglobal.org/how-to-be-an-effective-and-impactful-christian-writer-with-lawrence-darmani/]
*To become an effective trainer, we need to remember that training and equipping others is both a calling and an injunction. “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17).  The Lord wants us to sharpen others for them to write for Him.
**[https://maiglobal.org/es/why-is-training-writers-important/]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>mdlz3c8hg416d0jr5ijqpeh7z11yu4j</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Kofi Akpabli</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309937</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965211</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:04:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965211</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3645" sha1="48zp5ad0gc06od9ia7pmyv59e5d8x5u" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Kofi Akpabli|Kofi Akpabli]]''' (born 18 December 1973, Accra) is a Ghanaian academic, journalist, publisher, tourism consultant and cultural activist. He is a two-time winner of the CNN Multichoice African Journalist for Arts and Culture Awards. His latest work 'Made in Nima' has been featured in the new Commonwealth Anthology which was published in May 2016 Safe House: Explorations into Creative Non-Fiction.Akpabli has four books to his credit and currently works as a lecturer at Central University College in Ghana. He is a founding member of Ghana Cultural Forum and has participated in Xplore FrankfurtRheinemann 2012, Tallberg Forum, Sweden 2011, Berlin Art Festival 2010 and the Düsseldorf Art Preview 2010.
==Quotes==
*I had the good fortune of being ‘thrown’ off to the north easternmost part of Ghana to do my national service. For a first timer it was a curious, exotic world. My sense of adventure and my curious nature did the rest. By the first three months, I had seen most part of the region including parts of the upper west and Northern Region.
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/09/conversation-with-kofi-akpabli-author.html?m=1#:~:text=this%20interview%20focuses%20on%20his,Friendly%20Walk%20through%20Northern%20Ghana. In an interview]
* I had to travel to write every piece. As a freelance writer and journalist I can confide in you that I am in my element when I do travel writing. I enjoy doing it.
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/09/conversation-with-kofi-akpabli-author.html?m=1#:~:text=this%20interview%20focuses%20on%20his,Friendly%20Walk%20through%20Northern%20Ghana]
*Humour is important to me. One would say it enriches my work. I would say it defines me. Even when I write about death I could make my audience laugh. As to my real experiences yes, they made me smile a lot. Like when that goat urine sprayed my shirt. Question is which is easier: get angry and take all those responsible to task (including the goat) or laugh it off.  I choose humour, any day.
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/09/conversation-with-kofi-akpabli-author.html?m=1#:~:text=this%20interview%20focuses%20on%20his,Friendly%20Walk%20through%20Northern%20Ghana]
*Be myself and respect the other person. Everything else becomes easy. One thing I also did was to get a local guide. People feel important when you show them that you are ignorant and you want to know.
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/09/conversation-with-kofi-akpabli-author.html?m=1#:~:text=this%20interview%20focuses%20on%20his,Friendly%20Walk%20through%20Northern%20Ghana]
*I believe people think what they want to think. True, they are influenced by what they are exposed to, still, the final decision is theirs. I want to believe that with an open mind, one should realize that people are the same everywhere. It is only the environment which makes the difference.
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/09/conversation-with-kofi-akpabli-author.html?m=1#:~:text=this%20interview%20focuses%20on%20his,Friendly%20Walk%20through%20Northern%20Ghana]
*I am not a woman but I believe this is how they feel after they have delivered a baby. I feel I have downloaded something important that took a long time to form. Accomplished?  No. Just ‘finished with this one’ and looking for the next. Popularity? A few people claim I look familiar or my name sounds familiar. Is that how it begins? You tell me.
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/09/conversation-with-kofi-akpabli-author.html?m=1#:~:text=this%20interview%20focuses%20on%20his,Friendly%20Walk%20through%20Northern%20Ghana]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>48zp5ad0gc06od9ia7pmyv59e5d8x5u</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Meaza Mohammed</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309938</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965214</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:35:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3965214</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1766" sha1="f9gdxtr0hogsr0vbdrqkfze9kgysaxa" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Meaza Mohammed|Meaza Mohammed]]''' is an Ethiopian journalist, human rights activist and founder of Roha TV. She was awarded the International Women of Courage Award in 2023. Meaza was arrested the third time in 2022 for reporting impact of the war on women and children in Ethiopia.

== Quotes ==
*Courage is choosing the truth and to stand for it, even if it isn’t popular, because in the end, the truth shall make you free.
**[https://wpower.media/page/courage-knows-no-boundaries-the-bravest-women-in-the-world-2023]

*This award is a big thing, not only for me, but for the women in my country. Because in my country, having a media (outlet) or working in (the) press is very dangerous, very difficult.
**[https://www.africanews.com/2023/03/13/award-winning-ethiopian-journalist-sounds-the-alarm-over-press-freedom/] Meaza said this during an Interview with Africanews.

*Sometimes it gives you confidence whenever you are in an international level or whenever you are listened to in this way. My government also listens, whether they like it or not. They cannot be out of the international agenda.
**[https://www.africanews.com/2023/03/13/award-winning-ethiopian-journalist-sounds-the-alarm-over-press-freedom/] Meaza said this during an Interview with Africanews.

*Whenever something happens, the internet is shut down, journalists are arrested. We know that if something happens in the country, we could be arrested, we could be prosecuted or we could vanish.
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/ethiopian-journalist-recognized-for-giving-voice-to-survivors-of-conflict-/7023950] Meaza said this during an interview with Voice of America 

== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:People from Ethiopia]]
[[Category:Women]]</text>
      <sha1>f9gdxtr0hogsr0vbdrqkfze9kgysaxa</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965215</id>
      <parentid>3965214</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:38:31Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I added wiki links</comment>
      <origin>3965215</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1798" sha1="3gy6hmilwlphvqnghpgauecy8nlklrl" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Meaza Mohammed|Meaza Mohammed]]''' is an Ethiopian [[Journalism|journalist]], human rights [[Activism|activist]] and founder of Roha TV. She was awarded the International Women of Courage Award in 2023. Meaza was arrested the third time in 2022 for reporting impact of the war on women and children in [[Ethiopia]].

== Quotes ==
*Courage is choosing the truth and to stand for it, even if it isn’t popular, because in the end, the truth shall make you free.
**[https://wpower.media/page/courage-knows-no-boundaries-the-bravest-women-in-the-world-2023]

*This award is a big thing, not only for me, but for the women in my country. Because in my country, having a media (outlet) or working in (the) press is very dangerous, very difficult.
**[https://www.africanews.com/2023/03/13/award-winning-ethiopian-journalist-sounds-the-alarm-over-press-freedom/] Meaza said this during an Interview with Africanews.

*Sometimes it gives you confidence whenever you are in an international level or whenever you are listened to in this way. My government also listens, whether they like it or not. They cannot be out of the international agenda.
**[https://www.africanews.com/2023/03/13/award-winning-ethiopian-journalist-sounds-the-alarm-over-press-freedom/] Meaza said this during an Interview with Africanews.

*Whenever something happens, the internet is shut down, journalists are arrested. We know that if something happens in the country, we could be arrested, we could be prosecuted or we could vanish.
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/ethiopian-journalist-recognized-for-giving-voice-to-survivors-of-conflict-/7023950] Meaza said this during an interview with Voice of America 

== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:People from Ethiopia]]
[[Category:Women]]</text>
      <sha1>3gy6hmilwlphvqnghpgauecy8nlklrl</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965217</id>
      <parentid>3965215</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:42:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I added a photo</comment>
      <origin>3965217</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1853" sha1="lojfov3rm1qlrkw2aubky76673i4kny" xml:space="preserve">[[File:Meaza Mohammed 2023.jpg|thumb|Meaza Mohammed ]]
'''[[W:Meaza Mohammed|Meaza Mohammed]]''' is an Ethiopian [[Journalism|journalist]], human rights [[Activism|activist]] and founder of Roha TV. She was awarded the International Women of Courage Award in 2023. Meaza was arrested the third time in 2022 for reporting impact of the war on women and children in [[Ethiopia]].

== Quotes ==
*Courage is choosing the truth and to stand for it, even if it isn’t popular, because in the end, the truth shall make you free.
**[https://wpower.media/page/courage-knows-no-boundaries-the-bravest-women-in-the-world-2023]

*This award is a big thing, not only for me, but for the women in my country. Because in my country, having a media (outlet) or working in (the) press is very dangerous, very difficult.
**[https://www.africanews.com/2023/03/13/award-winning-ethiopian-journalist-sounds-the-alarm-over-press-freedom/] Meaza said this during an Interview with Africanews.

*Sometimes it gives you confidence whenever you are in an international level or whenever you are listened to in this way. My government also listens, whether they like it or not. They cannot be out of the international agenda.
**[https://www.africanews.com/2023/03/13/award-winning-ethiopian-journalist-sounds-the-alarm-over-press-freedom/] Meaza said this during an Interview with Africanews.

*Whenever something happens, the internet is shut down, journalists are arrested. We know that if something happens in the country, we could be arrested, we could be prosecuted or we could vanish.
**[https://www.voanews.com/a/ethiopian-journalist-recognized-for-giving-voice-to-survivors-of-conflict-/7023950] Meaza said this during an interview with Voice of America 

== External Links ==
{{Wikipedia}}

[[Category:Living people]]
[[Category:People from Ethiopia]]
[[Category:Women]]</text>
      <sha1>lojfov3rm1qlrkw2aubky76673i4kny</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Nii Ayikwei Parkes</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309939</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965218</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:43:01Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965218</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="4276" sha1="11pn53pahyt04huqtwhacu3sqye6oih" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Nii Ayikwei Parkes|Nii Ayikwei Parkes]]''' (born 1 April 1974), born in the United Kingdom to parents from Ghana, where he was raised, is a performance poet, writer, publisher and sociocultural commentator. He is one of 39 writers aged under 40 from sub-Saharan Africa who in April 2014 were named as part of the Hay Festival's prestigious Africa 39 project. He writes for children under the name K.P. Kojo.
==Quotes==
===Quotes for Friday from Nii Ayikwei Parkes' Tail of the Blue Bird===
*If you look you will see that whatever happens the birds will sing their song. Pg1
*The ancestors say that the truth is short but, sεbi, when the tale is bad, then even the truth stretches like a toad run over by a car on those new roads they are are building. Pg2
*Ei, the elders say that news is as restless as a bird [5]
*And when fear catches you, it returns you to screaming, your first language. Pg7
*I wanted to tell him that you do not light a fire under a fruit-bearing tree, but these young people think they invented knowledge so I ignored him. Pg9
*Remember that the monkey was eating long before the farmer was born . Pg9

*And I tell them that it is not just about beauty because beauty doesn't pay debts. But do they listen? Pg13

*He couldn't accept, as his grandfather's fellow had, that it was meant to be. His grandfather's life was not sunset, some light that went out whether you liked it or not. [32]
*That is why they say that the way the crab lives by the stream makes it understand the ways of water. Pg66

As the wise ones say it is not a name that changes the nature of an animal. Pg67

The simple black and orange batik cloth she had wrapped over her breast was amplified halfway down her body by her hips, which swung with the casual ease of a hypnotist's pendant. Pg99

*It is no mystery that when something leaves your hand, grief can take its place; it is the same way that rain takes the place of clouds. What we cannot understand is how heavy the rain can be. Pg100

*The wise ones say that everything in this world is like sleep; it comes and goes. It is so with happiness and madness. Pg103

*The brave man displays his courage and strength on the battlefield, not at home. Pg107

*When one starts on the path to evil good counsel sounds like a joke. Pg130

*They say nothing is other than what you see, but it is also true that nothing is other than what you don't see. Pg168 
**[https://freduagyeman.blogspot.com/2011/11/quotes-for-friday-from-nii-ayikwei.html?m=1#:~:text=The%20wise%20ones%20say%20that,so%20with%20happiness%20and%20madness.]
*“If my heart is broken, I should be thankful that I was blessed to have loved but I cannot live that wisely. That’s why I cry ”
**[https://poetryarchive.org/poet/nii-ayikwei-parkes/]
*Kayo leaned forward now, closing the distance between himself and the hunter. His mind was racing. 'So, the story you just told us. Is it true? Is that the story of Kofi Atta?'

The hunter sighed. 'That may be your story. I am not the one to tell you what is true. I am telling you a story. On this earth, we have to choose the story we tell, because it affects us - it affects how we live.
**[https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/6731765-tail-of-the-blue-bird#:~:text=I%20am%20not%20the%20one,it%20affects%20how%20we%20live.]
*They begin in my head, triggered by things that happen outside my head – usually an image or a sound, those are my primary stimuli – but my creation begins in sound.
**[https://poetryschool.com/interviews/where-it-begins-interview-nii-ayikwei-parkes/ He talks about were poem begins]
*I became aware I was writing poetry, when I was 10 and my father read something I had written and said, ‘you’re writing poems? Good.’ I don’t think of myself as a proper poet; I actually pride myself on being a quite improper poet.
**[https://poetryschool.com/interviews/where-it-begins-interview-nii-ayikwei-parkes/£ He spoke about when he started writing poems]
*I’m a patient and humble reader and I like to learn and nurture. I don’t know what that says about what to expect from the course, but good poems will be written.
**[https://poetryschool.com/interviews/where-it-begins-interview-nii-ayikwei-parkes/]
==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}
[[Category:living people]]</text>
      <sha1>11pn53pahyt04huqtwhacu3sqye6oih</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Yewande Akinse</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309940</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965220</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:55:13Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965220</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2060" sha1="hy2fncdwj6mpd2yo7osevvry6b0e5lr" xml:space="preserve">'''Yewande Akinse''' (née Adebowale) is a Nigerian poet, author and entrepreneur who co-founded, Salubata, Pap.earth and Plychain.
==Quotes==
*I usually engage in self promotion after writing a body of work, not before and not during. This approach gives me time to focus on writing and creating. Promotion comes afterwards, for I have found that self-promotion is an art that demands both time and patience.
*The biggest obstacle I faced in publishing is with funding the entire process. For my most recent work, every contributor was paid for their services, from the illustrator to the cover designer to the editor and publisher. Publishing a book is not a walk in the park, it takes a village and some costs too. Therefore, it is important for a self-published author to adequately plan for the publishing process, marketing and distribution.
*I use social media to promote my published works, interviews and snippets of works in progress. I also use social media to engage and connect with other authors, I have found the Writing Community to be most supportive on X formerly Twitter. Additionally, I use X to search for writing opportunities, open calls and residencies.
*My dream publication is The New Yorker. I greatly admire how The New Yorker has stayed relevant for the past 100 years with a legacy etched on the sands of time. It would be a great privilege to be published with The New Yorker and to contribute my words and voice to their legacy.
*First, I would completely remove barriers to submission and access called submission fees. These fees pose a great challenge to writers who are trying to find their place in the industry. Imagine applying to 25 publications or contests and for each one to require a submission fee, can you imagine how much this drills a hole in the pockets of writers? This is the reality many poets face in entering their works for competitions and publications with an uncertain outcome.
*To the writer trying to find the words and their place in the world, I hope that you keep writing, I hope it sets you free.</text>
      <sha1>hy2fncdwj6mpd2yo7osevvry6b0e5lr</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965221</id>
      <parentid>3965220</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T07:56:30Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965221</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2648" sha1="amitneh9gix34jnvw7y8nt3otpof5so" xml:space="preserve">'''Yewande Akinse''' (née Adebowale) is a Nigerian poet, author and entrepreneur who co-founded, Salubata, Pap.earth and Plychain.
==Quotes==
*I usually engage in self promotion after writing a body of work, not before and not during. This approach gives me time to focus on writing and creating. Promotion comes afterwards, for I have found that self-promotion is an art that demands both time and patience.
**[https://pronthego.com/pages/blog/meet-yewande-akinse-nigerian-poet-author-social-entrepreneur]
*The biggest obstacle I faced in publishing is with funding the entire process. For my most recent work, every contributor was paid for their services, from the illustrator to the cover designer to the editor and publisher. Publishing a book is not a walk in the park, it takes a village and some costs too. Therefore, it is important for a self-published author to adequately plan for the publishing process, marketing and distribution.
**[https://pronthego.com/pages/blog/meet-yewande-akinse-nigerian-poet-author-social-entrepreneur]
*I use social media to promote my published works, interviews and snippets of works in progress. I also use social media to engage and connect with other authors, I have found the Writing Community to be most supportive on X formerly Twitter. Additionally, I use X to search for writing opportunities, open calls and residencies.
**[https://pronthego.com/pages/blog/meet-yewande-akinse-nigerian-poet-author-social-entrepreneur]
*My dream publication is The New Yorker. I greatly admire how The New Yorker has stayed relevant for the past 100 years with a legacy etched on the sands of time. It would be a great privilege to be published with The New Yorker and to contribute my words and voice to their legacy.
**[https://pronthego.com/pages/blog/meet-yewande-akinse-nigerian-poet-author-social-entrepreneur]
*First, I would completely remove barriers to submission and access called submission fees. These fees pose a great challenge to writers who are trying to find their place in the industry. Imagine applying to 25 publications or contests and for each one to require a submission fee, can you imagine how much this drills a hole in the pockets of writers? This is the reality many poets face in entering their works for competitions and publications with an uncertain outcome.
**[https://pronthego.com/pages/blog/meet-yewande-akinse-nigerian-poet-author-social-entrepreneur]
*To the writer trying to find the words and their place in the world, I hope that you keep writing, I hope it sets you free.
**[https://pronthego.com/pages/blog/meet-yewande-akinse-nigerian-poet-author-social-entrepreneur]</text>
      <sha1>amitneh9gix34jnvw7y8nt3otpof5so</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Akilu Aliyu</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309941</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965222</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:02:32Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965222</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2260" sha1="ion44c4hdhl0co97vdh6v5ypfyb55g4" xml:space="preserve">'''Alhaji Dr. Aliyu Akilu M.F.R''' (1918 – October 19, 1999) also known as Malam Akilu Aliyu or Aqilu Aliyu was a Nigerian poet, writer, scholar, politician and one of the greatest Hausa poets of the twentieth century.
==Quotes==
*“I can say we have good leadership in the military, especially with the immediate past service chiefs. But the greatest problem is when you have lack of manpower, you stop recruitment, training of soldiers, you don’t ask for information.
*“Since 2015, nobody has called me, and I believe nobody called Aliyu Gusau, who had been there before me. I took over from him as head of military intelligence.
*“It’s our country, if we are approached, we will tell them the secret.
*“Before 2015, we have a committee of former security chiefs; all former Directors of DSS, Army, Navy, Air Force and Police were members. It was a very formidable committee that met quarterly in the Office of the National Security Adviser (ONSA).
*“But, with the advent of this administration, nobody has called any of us. We didn’t ask for salary or anything, and this committee was dissolved unceremoniously,”
*The retired General who was also member of the Supreme Military Council from 1989 to 1993 expressed worry on how thousands of Nigerians lost their lives to insurgency due to the bad attitude of leaders.
*“Civil war was fought and ended in less than three years. When the war started in 1967, General Gowon advocated for remobilisation to recall all those who retired, including those who fought the Second World War.
*“You recall well-trained, well-tested people to fight, not new recruits. This is what Gowon did and succeeded in ending the civil war. Why can’t we do that now?,”
*“What is IPOB? We shouldn’t have allowed it to degenerate into this stage. Kanu was arraigned about 3-4 years in Abuja, but how on earth, a government that is serious on security, granted Kanu bail, which bail? A person who assembled people, killing security and civilians and now you want to grant him bail? What sort of system are we running?
*“If Sambo Dasuki has been denied bail after many court orders, how on earth will you allow Kanu to be released? This is a terrorist, killing people. That is madness and stupidity.”</text>
      <sha1>ion44c4hdhl0co97vdh6v5ypfyb55g4</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965223</id>
      <parentid>3965222</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:04:36Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965223</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3040" sha1="56jp7qnm2mtwp9yqjegr30vu1rb9ta3" xml:space="preserve">'''Alhaji Dr. Aliyu Akilu M.F.R''' (1918 – October 19, 1999) also known as Malam Akilu Aliyu or Aqilu Aliyu was a Nigerian poet, writer, scholar, politician and one of the greatest Hausa poets of the twentieth century.
==Quotes==
*“I can say we have good leadership in the military, especially with the immediate past service chiefs. But the greatest problem is when you have lack of manpower, you stop recruitment, training of soldiers, you don’t ask for information.
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“Since 2015, nobody has called me, and I believe nobody called Aliyu Gusau, who had been there before me. I took over from him as head of military intelligence.
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“It’s our country, if we are approached, we will tell them the secret.
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“Before 2015, we have a committee of former security chiefs; all former Directors of DSS, Army, Navy, Air Force and Police were members. It was a very formidable committee that met quarterly in the Office of the National Security Adviser (ONSA).
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“But, with the advent of this administration, nobody has called any of us. We didn’t ask for salary or anything, and this committee was dissolved unceremoniously,”
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*The retired General who was also member of the Supreme Military Council from 1989 to 1993 expressed worry on how thousands of Nigerians lost their lives to insurgency due to the bad attitude of leaders.
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“Civil war was fought and ended in less than three years. When the war started in 1967, General Gowon advocated for remobilisation to recall all those who retired, including those who fought the Second World War.
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“You recall well-trained, well-tested people to fight, not new recruits. This is what Gowon did and succeeded in ending the civil war. Why can’t we do that now?,”
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“What is IPOB? We shouldn’t have allowed it to degenerate into this stage. Kanu was arraigned about 3-4 years in Abuja, but how on earth, a government that is serious on security, granted Kanu bail, which bail? A person who assembled people, killing security and civilians and now you want to grant him bail? What sort of system are we running?
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]
*“If Sambo Dasuki has been denied bail after many court orders, how on earth will you allow Kanu to be released? This is a terrorist, killing people. That is madness and stupidity.”
**[https://dailytrust.com/why-nigeria-is-yet-to-defeat-insurgency-gen-akilu/]</text>
      <sha1>56jp7qnm2mtwp9yqjegr30vu1rb9ta3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Timi Alaibe</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309942</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965224</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:05:08Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>UniqueMonik</username>
        <id>3349250</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>I created a page</comment>
      <origin>3965224</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1076" sha1="8hx7rushila933tfopad760iq8um1ik" xml:space="preserve">'''[[W:Timi Alaibe|Timi Alaibe]]''' (born June 10, 1962) is a Nigerian technocrat, businessman and politician from Bayelsa State. He is a former Managing Director of the Niger Delta Development Commission. (NDDC)

== Quotes ==
*I come with private sector experience and public sector experience. I am a compassionate father. I am a team player, I come with a strong character. I have strong leadership skills and as you all know I am a peace advocate.
**[https://www.vanguardngr.com/2019/09/guber-poll-now-bayelsa-needs-a-game-changer-alaibe/⁠] Timi said this during an Interview with Vanguard.

*My previous exit from the party was based on principle, while my return was based on necessity.
**[https://guardian.ng/politics/i-will-remain-in-pdp-and-fight-for-justice-says-timi-alaibe/]

*With the positive signals coming from the Niger Delta region... the country can conveniently fund the budget without recourse to external borrowing.
**[https://pmnewsnigeria.com/2017/03/18/2017-budget-x-raying-alaibes-view-funding/] He said this during an Interview on Arise Television</text>
      <sha1>8hx7rushila933tfopad760iq8um1ik</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Sueddie Agema</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309943</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965225</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:10:20Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965225</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2294" sha1="t2y00l7ucb8jv9rhfk9ci6vhk59tzd5" xml:space="preserve">'''Su'ur Su'eddie Vershima Agema''' is a Nigerian poet, editor and literary administrator. He is also a culture promoter. Author of two poetry collections, Bring our Casket Home: Tales one Shouldn’t Tell, and Home Equals Holes: Tale of an Exile, a short story collection, The Bottom of Another Tale and the NLNG Nigeria prize for literature 2022 nominated shortlisted book - Memory and the Call of Water. Agema is a past Chairman of the Association of Nigerian Authors (ANA) (Benue State Chapter) as well as Council Member, National Teen Authorship Scheme.
==Quotes==
*It is a bit of both. My piece is a coming of age story of a child with his dad who tells him many things based on events around them. The loss in the story is in the events that lead to tragedy for the environment and significant characters. The hope is embedded in the decision highlighted at the end to move forward with the struggle.
**[https://artsloungenyc.com/2022/06/06/interview-with-sueddie-vershima-agema/]
*My story is nostalgic, as I mentioned, and was inspired by the struggles of some of my forebears, my second father and grandfather and all the work they did as eco-warriors of various generations.
**[https://artsloungenyc.com/2022/06/06/interview-with-sueddie-vershima-agema/]
*Sometimes the most refined language comes out in the direst themes and situations. In a case where it is combined with a story from the heart, I am sure there will be no other result than beauty.
**[https://artsloungenyc.com/2022/06/06/interview-with-sueddie-vershima-agema/]
*That people will do better and be active eco-warriors. More than that, I am just glad that I got to spend some time in the memory of writing about my second father, Mr Charles Ayede. Hopefully, other people will be inspired by his life to do better or at least be inspired to write their own stories to share those they love with the world.
**[https://artsloungenyc.com/2022/06/06/interview-with-sueddie-vershima-agema/]
*I am a development consultant and eco-activist whose projects interface with climate change initiatives every once in a while. I hope to continue this journey while advocating for better attitudes to the geographical, social, and human environment.
**[https://artsloungenyc.com/2022/06/06/interview-with-sueddie-vershima-agema/]</text>
      <sha1>t2y00l7ucb8jv9rhfk9ci6vhk59tzd5</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Solomon Babalola</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309944</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965227</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:17:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965227</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1463" sha1="ki0hketxxy4b51fkmxfk2kegn3w2ep5" xml:space="preserve">'''Solomon Adeboye Babalola''' (born Ipetumodu, Osun State, Nigeria, 17 December 1926 – 15 December 2008) was a Nigerian academic, poet and scholar.
==Quotes==
*“Wale Adenuga Productions has been collaborating with us due to our media involvement in event organization. One day, Chairman Wale Adenuga expressed interest in writing a storyline about Down syndrome. When asked if we had someone suitable for the protagonist role, we recommended Solomon. They took him to their studio, auditioned him, and we sent our Special Educator, Helen Bassey, as a support staff to help him regain confidence in a new environment. They spent a month on the film location, and she was appropriately compensated.”
**[https://globalvoices.org/2024/01/27/how-a-nigerian-mother-supported-her-son-with-down-syndrome-to-become-a-successful-olympian/]
*“I want to urge parents to stop keeping their children with disabilities at home. They should look for a foundation like DSFN to enrol their wards. Within the period of seven years of my son’s studentship here, we have witnessed a lot of changes in him. To mention a few, when he was in a regular school, he could not write, read and identify alphabets and numbers. But we thank God that he has passed through those challenges now, and we are glad to send him on an errand without fear.”
**[https://globalvoices.org/2024/01/27/how-a-nigerian-mother-supported-her-son-with-down-syndrome-to-become-a-successful-olympian/]</text>
      <sha1>ki0hketxxy4b51fkmxfk2kegn3w2ep5</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Michael Echeruo</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309945</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965228</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:35:05Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965228</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2679" sha1="iydr3ppnn9n1rltxtg2utji8sl7a5ia" xml:space="preserve">'''Michael Joseph Chukwudalu Echeruo''' (born March 14, 1937) is a Nigerian academic, professor and literary critic from Umunumo, Ehime-Mbano LGA, Imo State in the southeastern region of Nigeria. He is the William Safire Professor of Modern Letters in the English Department at Syracuse University since 1990.
==Quotes==
*Actually from the beginning. I always conceived of Expert in All Styles as a collection that would tell, through various voices, perspectives, and styles, the story of contemporary Nigeria.  The collection’s purpose was to set out the flavour of Nigerian life at the end of the 20th and beginning of the 21st century, similar to James Joyce’s Dubliners in setting out early 20th century Irish life.
*The title was one I conceived for the collection from the beginning. Interestingly, the story Expert in All Styles was one of the last to be written, even though the title and its setting in a barber shop was an idea from the beginning. The explicit confidence of the craftsman, conveyed in signs that cries EXPERT IN ALL STYLES, is, for me, an attribute of the Nigerian spirit and this was something I wanted to capture in the collection. The story itself when I finally wrote it was of course more nuanced and complicated. 
*The stories and the characters that live in them come from life. From observing the life around us and having enough empathy to feel the world from the perspectives of others.  The characters come from this and the stories emerge from the characters themselves.  It is one of the reasons I love writing, this immersion in other lives, watching these characters and the stories that spring from them.
*It is incredibly important. I want to tell stories that matter to me. I want to interact with characters that resonate with me.
*Family, those with whom we most closely live our lives, are a key part in understanding and interrogating our human experience. The family relationships in the collection are varied and sometimes quite complicated with intriguing dynamics of love, joy, envy, betrayal, passion and disappointment.
*I am not sure there is any message that I would like readers to take. I want them to enjoy the stories, to feel that the time they have spent reading Expert in All Styles has enriched their lives. I certainly hope it does.
*Read and write. Write! Write! Write for yourself. Focus on the writing part. When that comes together you will have the satisfaction of creating work that resonates with you and derive satisfaction from the creative spirit that drew you to writing in the first place. Hopefully, the other things will take care of themselves. Focus on the writing. First, be happy with that.</text>
      <sha1>iydr3ppnn9n1rltxtg2utji8sl7a5ia</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965229</id>
      <parentid>3965228</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:36:34Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965229</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3560" sha1="j7fb332wrz82909ibnqgx81i37972nt" xml:space="preserve">'''Michael Joseph Chukwudalu Echeruo''' (born March 14, 1937) is a Nigerian academic, professor and literary critic from Umunumo, Ehime-Mbano LGA, Imo State in the southeastern region of Nigeria. He is the William Safire Professor of Modern Letters in the English Department at Syracuse University since 1990.
==Quotes==
*Actually from the beginning. I always conceived of Expert in All Styles as a collection that would tell, through various voices, perspectives, and styles, the story of contemporary Nigeria.  The collection’s purpose was to set out the flavour of Nigerian life at the end of the 20th and beginning of the 21st century, similar to James Joyce’s Dubliners in setting out early 20th century Irish life.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]
*The title was one I conceived for the collection from the beginning. Interestingly, the story Expert in All Styles was one of the last to be written, even though the title and its setting in a barber shop was an idea from the beginning. The explicit confidence of the craftsman, conveyed in signs that cries EXPERT IN ALL STYLES, is, for me, an attribute of the Nigerian spirit and this was something I wanted to capture in the collection. The story itself when I finally wrote it was of course more nuanced and complicated.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]
*The stories and the characters that live in them come from life. From observing the life around us and having enough empathy to feel the world from the perspectives of others.  The characters come from this and the stories emerge from the characters themselves.  It is one of the reasons I love writing, this immersion in other lives, watching these characters and the stories that spring from them.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]
*It is incredibly important. I want to tell stories that matter to me. I want to interact with characters that resonate with me.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]
*Family, those with whom we most closely live our lives, are a key part in understanding and interrogating our human experience. The family relationships in the collection are varied and sometimes quite complicated with intriguing dynamics of love, joy, envy, betrayal, passion and disappointment.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]
*I am not sure there is any message that I would like readers to take. I want them to enjoy the stories, to feel that the time they have spent reading Expert in All Styles has enriched their lives. I certainly hope it does.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]
*Read and write. Write! Write! Write for yourself. Focus on the writing part. When that comes together you will have the satisfaction of creating work that resonates with you and derive satisfaction from the creative spirit that drew you to writing in the first place. Hopefully, the other things will take care of themselves. Focus on the writing. First, be happy with that.
**[https://farafinabooks.com/the-stories-and-the-characters-that-live-in-them-comes-from-life-an-interview-with-i-o-echeruo/]</text>
      <sha1>j7fb332wrz82909ibnqgx81i37972nt</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Boakyewaa Glover</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309946</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965230</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T08:39:40Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965230</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1551" sha1="pf6sigqvjq3iafeaxo6rgijtwxu2liq" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Boakyewaa Glover|Boakyewaa Glover]]'''(born 27 April 1979) is a Ghanaian author, news broadcaster, and screenwriter. She is best known for writing the political thriller, The Justice.
==Quotes==
*Healing doesn’t follow a deadline.
**[https://www.linkedin.com/posts/boakyewaaglover_healing-doesnt-follow-a-deadline-it-activity-7325222759272214528-cbCq]
*It’s not just about grief. It’s about survival. About healing when no one sees your pain. About slowly coming back to life, one breath at a time.

If you’re navigating loss or supporting someone who is, I hope this speaks to you.
**[https://www.linkedin.com/posts/boakyewaaglover_healing-doesnt-follow-a-deadline-it-activity-7325222759272214528-cbCq]
*I’ve noticed an interesting shift in my viewing habits
over the past few years.I used to enjoy horror films and psychologically intense television.Today, I find myself avoiding stories that are relentlessly violent, traumatic or emotionally draining.It made me wonder whether this is simply part of getting older, the cumulative effect of carrying life’s stresses, or something else entirely.
Perhaps after years of navigating work, parenting, health challenges and everyday responsibilities, many of us unconsciously seek entertainment that restores rather than depletes us.I’m curious whether others have experienced the same change.Has your relationship with television, films or books evolved over time?
And if so…what are you watching now?
*[https://gh.linkedin.com/in/boakyewaaglover]
==External links==
{{Wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>pf6sigqvjq3iafeaxo6rgijtwxu2liq</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Muhammed Bello</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309947</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965231</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:05:03Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965231</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3376" sha1="s41i4imk9odfz3sm2ui23tenxa6hygs" xml:space="preserve">Muhammadu Bello (Arabic: محمد بلو ابن عثمان ابن فودي, romanized: Muḥammad Bello bin ʿUthmān bin Fūdī; 3 November 1781 – 25 October 1837) was the second Caliph of Sokoto and reigned from 1817 until 1837. He was also an active writer of history, poetry, and Islamic studies. He was the son and primary aide to Usman dan Fodio, the founder of the Sokoto Caliphate and the first caliph. During his reign, he encouraged the spread of Islam throughout the region, increasing education for both men and women, and the establishment of Islamic courts. He died on October 25, 1837, and was succeeded by his brother Abu Bakr Atiku and then his son, Aliyu Babba.
==Quotes==
*The journey so far is a successful one but obviously not without some challenges. In fact, I can say I found myself in the midst of journalism all of a sudden and it didn’t take me that long to catch up and blend, as if I was already in the cycle for long.
*And I think my background as a professional teacher at primary, secondary and tertiary schools has helped me a lot in fitting right away without much hitches. I could remember, I was at the university of Nsukka, Enugu state, in the south, for my post graduate studies, around 2006, when I was tipped for the opportunity to become a Correspondent for the Voice of Germany Radio, DW, Hausa Africa service, for South South and South East. Looking at my initial profession, a teacher, I quickly saw an international opportunity, foreseeing a boost in the exploratory world. I resolved in my heart to gather all the courage, determination and commitment and I grabbed it. And today here I am after weathering lots of storms in a bid to do things right. Alhamdulillah.
*Actually, I can say the motivation is in born, especially when I remember how at eight years old, I used to improvise myself with a cane or stick microphone, supported by sand, then while  holding a paper or book, I would be reading out as if I was broadcasting; a very clear elicitation of passion naturally so to say. So that passion to be like a press man was there. But after taking to the teaching profession later in life or rather finding myself in the teaching line, it didn’t occur to me that I would one day switch to journalism. Because of the passion for journalism, I didn’t waste time to grab the opportunity of being one when it came.  Journalism profession has really boosted my exploratory tendency both nationally and internationally.
*To practice journalism in the Niger Delta region, just like any other place on the planet earth, is a stance you take to begin to appreciate the uniqueness of a given people, their region, an oil gas region, their culture and social nature. Though one would appreciate how the region is seen from a far as being a crisis region, with militancy almost every where, which I later learnt it wasn’t militancy but rather agitation for freedom, because of feeling of disregard for their existence as humans by oil multi nationals and of course they always stressed the Nigerian government that gave the oil companies licenses to exploit their region for resources, with out regards for their environment and the people. To be a journalist in the Niger Delta, one should gather the courage of a soldier, because you are to take a trip to very many places in the area that are way too risky to get stories.</text>
      <sha1>s41i4imk9odfz3sm2ui23tenxa6hygs</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965232</id>
      <parentid>3965231</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:08:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965232</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="7994" sha1="3qse94lt1wnul4fb4m9nna3uedhhxvu" xml:space="preserve">'''Muhammadu Bello''' (Arabic: محمد بلو ابن عثمان ابن فودي, romanized: Muḥammad Bello bin ʿUthmān bin Fūdī; 3 November 1781 – 25 October 1837) was the second Caliph of Sokoto and reigned from 1817 until 1837. He was also an active writer of history, poetry, and Islamic studies. He was the son and primary aide to Usman dan Fodio, the founder of the Sokoto Caliphate and the first caliph. During his reign, he encouraged the spread of Islam throughout the region, increasing education for both men and women, and the establishment of Islamic courts. He died on October 25, 1837, and was succeeded by his brother Abu Bakr Atiku and then his son, Aliyu Babba.
==Quotes==
*The journey so far is a successful one but obviously not without some challenges. In fact, I can say I found myself in the midst of journalism all of a sudden and it didn’t take me that long to catch up and blend, as if I was already in the cycle for long.
*And I think my background as a professional teacher at primary, secondary and tertiary schools has helped me a lot in fitting right away without much hitches. I could remember, I was at the university of Nsukka, Enugu state, in the south, for my post graduate studies, around 2006, when I was tipped for the opportunity to become a Correspondent for the Voice of Germany Radio, DW, Hausa Africa service, for South South and South East. Looking at my initial profession, a teacher, I quickly saw an international opportunity, foreseeing a boost in the exploratory world. I resolved in my heart to gather all the courage, determination and commitment and I grabbed it. And today here I am after weathering lots of storms in a bid to do things right. Alhamdulillah.
*Actually, I can say the motivation is in born, especially when I remember how at eight years old, I used to improvise myself with a cane or stick microphone, supported by sand, then while  holding a paper or book, I would be reading out as if I was broadcasting; a very clear elicitation of passion naturally so to say. So that passion to be like a press man was there. But after taking to the teaching profession later in life or rather finding myself in the teaching line, it didn’t occur to me that I would one day switch to journalism. Because of the passion for journalism, I didn’t waste time to grab the opportunity of being one when it came.  Journalism profession has really boosted my exploratory tendency both nationally and internationally.
*To practice journalism in the Niger Delta region, just like any other place on the planet earth, is a stance you take to begin to appreciate the uniqueness of a given people, their region, an oil gas region, their culture and social nature. Though one would appreciate how the region is seen from a far as being a crisis region, with militancy almost every where, which I later learnt it wasn’t militancy but rather agitation for freedom, because of feeling of disregard for their existence as humans by oil multi nationals and of course they always stressed the Nigerian government that gave the oil companies licenses to exploit their region for resources, with out regards for their environment and the people. To be a journalist in the Niger Delta, one should gather the courage of a soldier, because you are to take a trip to very many places in the area that are way too risky to get stories.
*You use speed boat that could easily tumble, passing small and large Rivers peaceful and hostile communities, just to see for your self realities of region for you to make a story. One should also be ready to meet the agitators who always carry weapons of all kinds, you speak with them with confidence, before later perhaps you eventually build good relationships, that make them have feelings of confidence in you too, so they can tell you anything you want to hear.
*As a journalist in the region you look at the people, their environment, the workings of operations of oil companies, the joint task force ,oil bunkering activities and all that. Also you should understand that I also cover the south East region, Igbo land, in my reportage. This also draws me closer to agitators of Biafra,an opportunity to know the very complexities of their separatist movement to secede from Nigeria to form a separate independent nation they call Biafra. In the south East also you look at their devastating environment in the form of erosion, their economic activities, their rich cultures and politics. There are indeed whole lots of stories indeed to tell the world.
*Not all, no regret honestly. Because I see journalism as a step further in teaching. Definitely, I see both journalism and teaching as incredibly beneficial to society though in different ways. Journalists you play a crucial role in informing the public, uncovering important stories, and holding individuals and institutions accountable. They help keep the public informed about current events, and their work can lead to positive changes in society. On the other hand, teachers play a vital role in shaping the future by educating and inspiring the next generation. They have a direct impact on the lives of young people, helping them develop the knowledge and skills they need to succeed. Both careers contribute to the betterment of society in their own unique ways. So technically, after you are taught in the class as to how to  do things in life as a government official for example, I for one, appreciate the task of ensuring that they do them right according to the rules, if not then I will report you to the public for them to judge you.
*Honestly ,I didn’t see it coming, I never imagined it ,so it just came by the grace of Allah. And honestly I feel honoured and very happy that the people of the region you work find it worthy to honour you. It’s really dignifying, and will go down the history lane indefinitely. And I really thank Allah and the Foundation for Peace and Non Violence movement for their gesture. Actually I can say this is an honour done to me by the Niger Delta people, an honour to the Germany Broadcasting services of Hausa and English for Africa.
*It means inspiration for me to do more in the good things I have been doing in my reportage, and an inspiration to an upcoming generation of journalists wishing to practice in the Niger Delta or any where else.
*The very very interesting part of the interview is now popping up. The Niger Delta people are very friendly and peace loving, that is if you really want to make peace with them. Niger Delta is an heterogeneous society with several ethnic groups including the Urhobo, Delta Ibo, Isoko, Itsekiri, Ijaw (or Ezon) and Ukwuani groups in Delta State. The economic life of the people of the Niger Delta is largely determined by their environment. Those who live around the coastal areas are largely fishermen and traders, whereas those in the hinterland cultivate food crops such as cassava, yam, vegetables etc, and cash crops such as oil palm and rubber. Though activities of oil companies have affected the ecosystem entirely, destroying it almost completely through massive oil spill in rivers where the people fish, and spilling uplands even destroying farms and their sources of drinking water. Gas flaring too is another disaster risk to these easy going people. When you travel deeper into the creeks, you see communities living in the midst of all these hazards which you and many people will not tolerate. And these were some of the issues that pushed for militancy so to say , to fight for their environment and for a fair share of the resources of oil and gas being drilled from their area and some times from their backyard almost every blessed day.  But thank God, perhaps after series of negotiations, the region and the people are calm now and oil operations area going on uninterrupted. In fact Nigeria whose OPEC Quota was 1,700,000 barrels a day, heightened militancy had to bring it down to 700, 000 barrels a day around 2015 to 2016.</text>
      <sha1>3qse94lt1wnul4fb4m9nna3uedhhxvu</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965235</id>
      <parentid>3965232</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:11:50Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965235</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="9056" sha1="bdd5n5jd533uv0pr20gl5sx9h9nhva2" xml:space="preserve">'''Muhammadu Bello''' (Arabic: محمد بلو ابن عثمان ابن فودي, romanized: Muḥammad Bello bin ʿUthmān bin Fūdī; 3 November 1781 – 25 October 1837) was the second Caliph of Sokoto and reigned from 1817 until 1837. He was also an active writer of history, poetry, and Islamic studies. He was the son and primary aide to Usman dan Fodio, the founder of the Sokoto Caliphate and the first caliph. During his reign, he encouraged the spread of Islam throughout the region, increasing education for both men and women, and the establishment of Islamic courts. He died on October 25, 1837, and was succeeded by his brother Abu Bakr Atiku and then his son, Aliyu Babba.
==Quotes==
*The journey so far is a successful one but obviously not without some challenges. In fact, I can say I found myself in the midst of journalism all of a sudden and it didn’t take me that long to catch up and blend, as if I was already in the cycle for long.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*And I think my background as a professional teacher at primary, secondary and tertiary schools has helped me a lot in fitting right away without much hitches. I could remember, I was at the university of Nsukka, Enugu state, in the south, for my post graduate studies, around 2006, when I was tipped for the opportunity to become a Correspondent for the Voice of Germany Radio, DW, Hausa Africa service, for South South and South East. Looking at my initial profession, a teacher, I quickly saw an international opportunity, foreseeing a boost in the exploratory world. I resolved in my heart to gather all the courage, determination and commitment and I grabbed it. And today here I am after weathering lots of storms in a bid to do things right. Alhamdulillah.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*Actually, I can say the motivation is in born, especially when I remember how at eight years old, I used to improvise myself with a cane or stick microphone, supported by sand, then while  holding a paper or book, I would be reading out as if I was broadcasting; a very clear elicitation of passion naturally so to say. So that passion to be like a press man was there. But after taking to the teaching profession later in life or rather finding myself in the teaching line, it didn’t occur to me that I would one day switch to journalism. Because of the passion for journalism, I didn’t waste time to grab the opportunity of being one when it came.  Journalism profession has really boosted my exploratory tendency both nationally and internationally.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*To practice journalism in the Niger Delta region, just like any other place on the planet earth, is a stance you take to begin to appreciate the uniqueness of a given people, their region, an oil gas region, their culture and social nature. Though one would appreciate how the region is seen from a far as being a crisis region, with militancy almost every where, which I later learnt it wasn’t militancy but rather agitation for freedom, because of feeling of disregard for their existence as humans by oil multi nationals and of course they always stressed the Nigerian government that gave the oil companies licenses to exploit their region for resources, with out regards for their environment and the people. To be a journalist in the Niger Delta, one should gather the courage of a soldier, because you are to take a trip to very many places in the area that are way too risky to get stories.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*You use speed boat that could easily tumble, passing small and large Rivers peaceful and hostile communities, just to see for your self realities of region for you to make a story. One should also be ready to meet the agitators who always carry weapons of all kinds, you speak with them with confidence, before later perhaps you eventually build good relationships, that make them have feelings of confidence in you too, so they can tell you anything you want to hear.
*As a journalist in the region you look at the people, their environment, the workings of operations of oil companies, the joint task force ,oil bunkering activities and all that. Also you should understand that I also cover the south East region, Igbo land, in my reportage. This also draws me closer to agitators of Biafra,an opportunity to know the very complexities of their separatist movement to secede from Nigeria to form a separate independent nation they call Biafra. In the south East also you look at their devastating environment in the form of erosion, their economic activities, their rich cultures and politics. There are indeed whole lots of stories indeed to tell the world.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*Not all, no regret honestly. Because I see journalism as a step further in teaching. Definitely, I see both journalism and teaching as incredibly beneficial to society though in different ways. Journalists you play a crucial role in informing the public, uncovering important stories, and holding individuals and institutions accountable. They help keep the public informed about current events, and their work can lead to positive changes in society. On the other hand, teachers play a vital role in shaping the future by educating and inspiring the next generation. They have a direct impact on the lives of young people, helping them develop the knowledge and skills they need to succeed. Both careers contribute to the betterment of society in their own unique ways. So technically, after you are taught in the class as to how to  do things in life as a government official for example, I for one, appreciate the task of ensuring that they do them right according to the rules, if not then I will report you to the public for them to judge you.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*Honestly ,I didn’t see it coming, I never imagined it ,so it just came by the grace of Allah. And honestly I feel honoured and very happy that the people of the region you work find it worthy to honour you. It’s really dignifying, and will go down the history lane indefinitely. And I really thank Allah and the Foundation for Peace and Non Violence movement for their gesture. Actually I can say this is an honour done to me by the Niger Delta people, an honour to the Germany Broadcasting services of Hausa and English for Africa.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*It means inspiration for me to do more in the good things I have been doing in my reportage, and an inspiration to an upcoming generation of journalists wishing to practice in the Niger Delta or any where else.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]
*The very very interesting part of the interview is now popping up. The Niger Delta people are very friendly and peace loving, that is if you really want to make peace with them. Niger Delta is an heterogeneous society with several ethnic groups including the Urhobo, Delta Ibo, Isoko, Itsekiri, Ijaw (or Ezon) and Ukwuani groups in Delta State. The economic life of the people of the Niger Delta is largely determined by their environment. Those who live around the coastal areas are largely fishermen and traders, whereas those in the hinterland cultivate food crops such as cassava, yam, vegetables etc, and cash crops such as oil palm and rubber. Though activities of oil companies have affected the ecosystem entirely, destroying it almost completely through massive oil spill in rivers where the people fish, and spilling uplands even destroying farms and their sources of drinking water. Gas flaring too is another disaster risk to these easy going people. When you travel deeper into the creeks, you see communities living in the midst of all these hazards which you and many people will not tolerate. And these were some of the issues that pushed for militancy so to say , to fight for their environment and for a fair share of the resources of oil and gas being drilled from their area and some times from their backyard almost every blessed day.  But thank God, perhaps after series of negotiations, the region and the people are calm now and oil operations area going on uninterrupted. In fact Nigeria whose OPEC Quota was 1,700,000 barrels a day, heightened militancy had to bring it down to 700, 000 barrels a day around 2015 to 2016.
**[https://dailytrust.com/interview-the-journey-from-classroom-to-newsroom-has-been-interesting-bello-dw-journalist/]</text>
      <sha1>bdd5n5jd533uv0pr20gl5sx9h9nhva2</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Love All Play</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309948</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965233</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:11:24Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39734-26</username>
        <id>3350214</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;'''Love All Play''' is a 2024 South Korean television series.  == Park Tae-jun == * &quot;The most annoying thing is being slightly talented.&quot;  [[Category:2022 television series debuts]] [[Category:South Korean television series]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965233</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="225" sha1="3b2s047lu16zbzpf28yat61u85in3ez" xml:space="preserve">'''Love All Play''' is a 2024 South Korean television series.

== Park Tae-jun ==
* &quot;The most annoying thing is being slightly talented.&quot;

[[Category:2022 television series debuts]]
[[Category:South Korean television series]]</text>
      <sha1>3b2s047lu16zbzpf28yat61u85in3ez</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965234</id>
      <parentid>3965233</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:11:46Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39734-26</username>
        <id>3350214</id>
      </contributor>
      <origin>3965234</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="225" sha1="lv078l2da7096rmo3d8dv1a2uygx4w6" xml:space="preserve">'''Love All Play''' is a 2022 South Korean television series.

== Park Tae-jun ==
* &quot;The most annoying thing is being slightly talented.&quot;

[[Category:2022 television series debuts]]
[[Category:South Korean television series]]</text>
      <sha1>lv078l2da7096rmo3d8dv1a2uygx4w6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Dennis Osadebay</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309949</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965236</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:24:12Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965236</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2382" sha1="pv2xk66gw5ctbdthb4x49whlo8uyalp" xml:space="preserve">'''Dennis Chukude Osadebay''' (29 June 1911 — 26 December 1994) was a Nigerian politician, poet, journalist and former premier of the now defunct Mid-Western Region of Nigeria, which now comprises Edo State and Delta State. He was one of the pioneering Nigerian poets who wrote in English.
==Quotes==
*&quot;When we came in here, it was like a ghost town, all of you can testify to that, the records are there to show. There was no befitting building here before, there was no place for the VC to stay and I asked myself how else will I go?
*&quot;I stayed in the campus and was disappointed because it was like a glorified secondary school. With all those behind my mind, I asked God to give me the strength otherwise I go back to Lagos, but I was brought here because of my pedigree and the records I had.&quot;
*&quot;They gave us 35 programmes to run and the programmes cannot sustain the existence of this University because they are the least demanded programmes from applicants.
*&quot;So I asked myself from the experience all over the places in the world, what is my vision for the University? The slogan I was given was not in consonant with reality, so I sat down because my areas of specialization is strategic and general management. 
*&quot;So i defined what the University should be, 'I want to empower the future generations' our mission is to provide tradition of excellence in teaching, research, innovation, entrepreneurial skills and competent endeavours towards meeting societal needs. 
*&quot;Our vision is to be a leading transformational University for the empowerment of all stakeholders leveraging on technology. 
*&quot;So, I increased the programmes from 35 to 46 since I had the advantage of being an accreditor to NUC for decades, so I leveraged on that to go and meet them. 
*&quot;I said the Governor meant well, it was not out of paucity of funds but surplus that he created three Universities at the same time. He felt the needs of Deltans that total number of candidates that applied for JAMB in each year it doesn't take much number, the rest becomes political thugs, criminals, yahoo yahoo. 
*&quot;Those are the things that encouraged us to say go ahead. Keep fighting until you get where you are going to and we did that to the glory of God, they came for accreditation last year, we got some full, some interim and I have approached NUC again to give us more programmes to enable us exist.&quot;</text>
      <sha1>pv2xk66gw5ctbdthb4x49whlo8uyalp</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965237</id>
      <parentid>3965236</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:26:39Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965237</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3214" sha1="7zxvi89vz5z47bk72gtuppakfp29hk6" xml:space="preserve">'''Dennis Chukude Osadebay''' (29 June 1911 — 26 December 1994) was a Nigerian politician, poet, journalist and former premier of the now defunct Mid-Western Region of Nigeria, which now comprises Edo State and Delta State. He was one of the pioneering Nigerian poets who wrote in English.
==Quotes==
*&quot;When we came in here, it was like a ghost town, all of you can testify to that, the records are there to show. There was no befitting building here before, there was no place for the VC to stay and I asked myself how else will I go?
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;I stayed in the campus and was disappointed because it was like a glorified secondary school. With all those behind my mind, I asked God to give me the strength otherwise I go back to Lagos, but I was brought here because of my pedigree and the records I had.&quot;
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;They gave us 35 programmes to run and the programmes cannot sustain the existence of this University because they are the least demanded programmes from applicants.
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;So I asked myself from the experience all over the places in the world, what is my vision for the University? The slogan I was given was not in consonant with reality, so I sat down because my areas of specialization is strategic and general management.
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;So i defined what the University should be, 'I want to empower the future generations' our mission is to provide tradition of excellence in teaching, research, innovation, entrepreneurial skills and competent endeavours towards meeting societal needs.
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;Our vision is to be a leading transformational University for the empowerment of all stakeholders leveraging on technology.
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;So, I increased the programmes from 35 to 46 since I had the advantage of being an accreditor to NUC for decades, so I leveraged on that to go and meet them.
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;I said the Governor meant well, it was not out of paucity of funds but surplus that he created three Universities at the same time. He felt the needs of Deltans that total number of candidates that applied for JAMB in each year it doesn't take much number, the rest becomes political thugs, criminals, yahoo yahoo.
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]
*&quot;Those are the things that encouraged us to say go ahead. Keep fighting until you get where you are going to and we did that to the glory of God, they came for accreditation last year, we got some full, some interim and I have approached NUC again to give us more programmes to enable us exist.&quot;
**[https://www.truthreporters.com.ng/2024/10/dennis-osadebay-varsity-was-glorified.html?m=1]</text>
      <sha1>7zxvi89vz5z47bk72gtuppakfp29hk6</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Portia Dery</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309950</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965239</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:32:43Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Kenmercy</username>
        <id>3345535</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created entry #Voice4Africa</comment>
      <origin>3965239</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="2494" sha1="1nvjkyaey387ynsvr2fwf3p8imyz2vx" xml:space="preserve">'''[[w:Portia Dery|Portia Dery]]'''is a writer from Ghana who is best known for her children's stories but she also writes short stories and poetry.  Her works have been published in various magazines, anthologies and platforms, including the UK poetry library, Arts Beat, Africa's first anthology, and the Ayiba magazine.
==Quotes==
*My love for reading and awe for books. They inspired me to imagine a world on my own terms as early as age eight. This soon transcended beyond just writing for myself into telling African stories that children everywhere could find themselves in and use to fly away into their own world. I am very grateful to be able to help increase the diversity of African children’s literature a book at a time.
**[https://www.sundaytimes.timeslive.co.za/sunday-times/books/news/2020-02-25-qa-with-ghanaian-author-and-literacy-activist-portia-dery/]
*Write about what you would have loved to read as a child. While some find it the hardest, writing for children can be a wonderful opportunity to go back to your childhood memories. I find this very therapeutic - a free ticket to escape from the adult world for a moment. The writing process for Gogo’s List was such a pleasure because I shared it with some children in my literacy clinic. I would read a chapter and ask what they thought. Sometimes I would just observe the body language. This greatly helped me to see the world of Fatima through their eyes.
**[https://www.sundaytimes.timeslive.co.za/sunday-times/books/news/2020-02-25-qa-with-ghanaian-author-and-literacy-activist-portia-dery/]
*Storytelling is food for the soul. Gone are the days when children will sit by the fireside to hear lovely stories, retold with such passion, vigour, and hope by people who themselves sat by the fireside. But even with our busy lives, we still can make time to tell our stories, especially to children, and encourage children to write their reflections on these stories. Whatever family unit you have, you could create 30 minutes of 'family-time' – perhaps weekly or even monthly – to share old stories and hear new, modern stories. Oral storytelling is powerful too.
**[https://www.sundaytimes.timeslive.co.za/sunday-times/books/news/2020-02-25-qa-with-ghanaian-author-and-literacy-activist-portia-dery/]
*If you walk in the measurable, you miss out on the imaginable
**[https://imagnaryhouse.com/pages/portia-dery?srsltid=AfmBOoo_0Py34B5_05c1iZcubcE3KgtebXJfWrDFVzuHyomEOQc46fRK]
==External links==
{{wikipedia}}</text>
      <sha1>1nvjkyaey387ynsvr2fwf3p8imyz2vx</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:American coming-of-age comedy films</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309951</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965241</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T09:36:23Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:American coming-of-age films|Comedy]] [[Category:American comedy films|Coming-of-age]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965241</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="97" sha1="h3henrc4h4xhcpsj7vtsg5zrl49j9vu" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:American coming-of-age films|Comedy]]
[[Category:American comedy films|Coming-of-age]]</text>
      <sha1>h3henrc4h4xhcpsj7vtsg5zrl49j9vu</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:American coming-of-age animated films</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309952</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965247</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:00:25Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:American coming-of-age films]] [[Category:Animated coming-of-age films]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965247</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="83" sha1="a6yn5o27d4wt6v5bt4xgw8goh94qzcf" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:American coming-of-age films]]
[[Category:Animated coming-of-age films]]</text>
      <sha1>a6yn5o27d4wt6v5bt4xgw8goh94qzcf</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:American coming-of-age comedy-drama films</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309953</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965250</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:13:27Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:American comedy-drama films|Coming-of-age]] [[Category:American coming-of-age films|Comedy-drama]] [[Category:American coming-of-age comedy films|Drama]] [[Category:American coming-of-age drama films|Comedy]] [[Category:Coming-of-age comedy-drama films]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965250</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="265" sha1="osavvc702xra1bu9b9ta1monbq15piz" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:American comedy-drama films|Coming-of-age]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age films|Comedy-drama]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age comedy films|Drama]]
[[Category:American coming-of-age drama films|Comedy]]
[[Category:Coming-of-age comedy-drama films]]</text>
      <sha1>osavvc702xra1bu9b9ta1monbq15piz</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Coming-of-age comedy-drama films</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309954</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965252</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:25:58Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Coming-of-age comedy films|Drama]] [[Category:Coming-of-age drama films|Comedy]] [[Category:Comedy-drama films]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965252</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="123" sha1="oddc7wqc9ozm9mxqpkaf2i9ty8a2sn9" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Coming-of-age comedy films|Drama]]
[[Category:Coming-of-age drama films|Comedy]]
[[Category:Comedy-drama films]]</text>
      <sha1>oddc7wqc9ozm9mxqpkaf2i9ty8a2sn9</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Coming-of-age drama films</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309955</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965253</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:27:55Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Coming-of-age films|Drama]] [[Category:Teen drama films]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965253</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="68" sha1="ta2czy25oebamvdzstsq1x3jq4j7c85" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Coming-of-age films|Drama]]
[[Category:Teen drama films]]</text>
      <sha1>ta2czy25oebamvdzstsq1x3jq4j7c85</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Uchechukwu Umezurike</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309956</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965254</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:46:52Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965254</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="3142" sha1="m85rcuk74giq3108zsfnwtygyi7byib" xml:space="preserve">'''Uchechukwu Peter Umezurike''', also known as Uche Peter Umez, is a Nigerian author and academic currently working as an assistant professor of English at the University of Calgary. In addition to publishing several works of children’s fiction, short fiction, and poetry, his academic research draws from gender studies and critical race theory to analyze African, African diaspora, postcolonial, and global literatures as well as film.
==Quotes==
*Thanks, Nzube, I appreciate all the work you do for African literature. It’s inspiring to see a younger generation of Africans building and fostering platforms to promote African literary and cultural productions. Look at what you are doing, the same thing Ukamaka Olisakwe (Isele), Obi-Young Otosirieze (Open Country), Umar Abubakar Sidi and Richard Ali (Konya Shamsrumi), and Kenechi Uzor (Iskanchi) are doing for African writing, and many others. I feel heartened by the reception I’ve received from people who have read Double Wahala, Double Trouble. I’m glad that Bibi Ukonu and his team at Griots Lounge Publishing, Canada agreed to publish it. Double Wahala, Double Trouble is a montage of people’s experiences, stories, and lives, which I happened to crystallise as fiction, something more relatable for me, and I hope, for my readers. I wanted to explore the frequency of trouble in our world, how trouble haunts our being and relationships, the everydayness of trouble as it besets desire, love, intimacy, family, community, and even the nation. Trouble is very much at home with us, it seems. Yet beyond this exploration of trouble, I wanted to understand how people manage to deal with tragedy while attempting to make sense of their world.
*There were times the writing was fun; other times, it was a struggle, mainly because I had to juggle my academic research, noncreative writing, and other quotidian commitments. But then, you already know, no form of writing comes easy to the writer. You must do the backbreaking work while making sure to take care of yourself. Life happens; it doesn’t slow down just because you are recrafting a scene or revising a draft. In hindsight, I’m glad that I put the collection together. Double Wahala, Double Trouble is out there. What a relief!
*Many of the stories had lurked in my mind for more years than I can recollect. It must have taken me more than a decade from writing the first story to the last one, which I wrote, I think, sometime in 2017. I finished working on the manuscript in 2018, during the second year of my PhD program, then left the manuscript until sometime in 2019, when I felt I should revise it and send it to an editor. I didn’t look at the manuscript again until 2020 after I’d received significant feedback from my first editor, the amazing Kimmy Beach. When I felt right about the manuscript, I sent it to a few Nigerian publishers. However, while I was waiting for their response, Griots Lounge Publishing, Canada indicated an interest in the manuscript, and then we worked with two wonderful editors, Kara Toews and Tayo ‘Keyede, to get it ready for publication. So, the rest is history.</text>
      <sha1>m85rcuk74giq3108zsfnwtygyi7byib</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965258</id>
      <parentid>3965254</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:50:50Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965258</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="7317" sha1="j21kr1mwlkvx13z893y5o0jtqcimr2q" xml:space="preserve">'''Uchechukwu Peter Umezurike''', also known as Uche Peter Umez, is a Nigerian author and academic currently working as an assistant professor of English at the University of Calgary. In addition to publishing several works of children’s fiction, short fiction, and poetry, his academic research draws from gender studies and critical race theory to analyze African, African diaspora, postcolonial, and global literatures as well as film.
==Quotes==
*Thanks, Nzube, I appreciate all the work you do for African literature. It’s inspiring to see a younger generation of Africans building and fostering platforms to promote African literary and cultural productions. Look at what you are doing, the same thing Ukamaka Olisakwe (Isele), Obi-Young Otosirieze (Open Country), Umar Abubakar Sidi and Richard Ali (Konya Shamsrumi), and Kenechi Uzor (Iskanchi) are doing for African writing, and many others. I feel heartened by the reception I’ve received from people who have read Double Wahala, Double Trouble. I’m glad that Bibi Ukonu and his team at Griots Lounge Publishing, Canada agreed to publish it. Double Wahala, Double Trouble is a montage of people’s experiences, stories, and lives, which I happened to crystallise as fiction, something more relatable for me, and I hope, for my readers. I wanted to explore the frequency of trouble in our world, how trouble haunts our being and relationships, the everydayness of trouble as it besets desire, love, intimacy, family, community, and even the nation. Trouble is very much at home with us, it seems. Yet beyond this exploration of trouble, I wanted to understand how people manage to deal with tragedy while attempting to make sense of their world.
*There were times the writing was fun; other times, it was a struggle, mainly because I had to juggle my academic research, noncreative writing, and other quotidian commitments. But then, you already know, no form of writing comes easy to the writer. You must do the backbreaking work while making sure to take care of yourself. Life happens; it doesn’t slow down just because you are recrafting a scene or revising a draft. In hindsight, I’m glad that I put the collection together. Double Wahala, Double Trouble is out there. What a relief!
*Many of the stories had lurked in my mind for more years than I can recollect. It must have taken me more than a decade from writing the first story to the last one, which I wrote, I think, sometime in 2017. I finished working on the manuscript in 2018, during the second year of my PhD program, then left the manuscript until sometime in 2019, when I felt I should revise it and send it to an editor. I didn’t look at the manuscript again until 2020 after I’d received significant feedback from my first editor, the amazing Kimmy Beach. When I felt right about the manuscript, I sent it to a few Nigerian publishers. However, while I was waiting for their response, Griots Lounge Publishing, Canada indicated an interest in the manuscript, and then we worked with two wonderful editors, Kara Toews and Tayo ‘Keyede, to get it ready for publication. So, the rest is history.
*I would say “Neighbours” because it seems, to me, the funniest story in the collection, aside from “Stupid.” “Neighbours” tells the story of a quirky artist and his enchantment with his neighbour’s handsome face. But it is also a story about male violence, deception, and trauma. That also happens to be my wife’s favourite story. I enjoyed writing it.
*Yes, I remember that interview I had with Sokari Ekine, the founder of Black Looks. I was trying to understand the dimensions of history then, which I’m still doing right now. History not only as time past, an event or a series of events that happened in the past, but also time in the present—the haunting that a past event leaves in the present moment. I’m struck by the pivots of before and now, the dynamic between both. We live in history and cannot escape it. History is perhaps a door with multiple doors. It is never shut but remains open. Who can slam shut the door of history? Moreover, history is here even though it happened then. The present is a history unfolding, interleaving into the past while clearing its own history for the future. For the future citizens, their present is our time past, our present as historical. There is a continuum. A story refuses the fixity of the past. Every story that has been told is of the past, present, and future, so what stories we tell, the stories we share among ourselves, are shaped by our relationship to history and how we perceive the past and anticipate the future, be it in relation or opposition to the present. That is the connection I’ve been trying to figure out; this connection is evident in how I crafted some of my stories in Double Wahala, Double Trouble. The past of colonialism, figured now as neocolonialism, in the politics of Nigeria and the plunder of the oil-rich Niger Delta. The past of Biafra, restless, chafing the core of national harmony. Is the past of Nigeria any more radically different from the present Nigeria, especially if we consider the frequency of deaths and depredations fellow Nigerians live with? So, like you, I am interested in how history contours and informs the present society.
*Please let’s get something clear here: I don’t think I have been out of Nigeria for a considerably long time. And even if I have, what does it matter and how does it impact my art? Who decides who a Nigerian or African is? What does it mean to be a “real” Nigerian or African writer? Such nativist sentiments. I have lived in at least 20 states in Nigeria, so why should anyone dare to question my Nigerianness or tell me not to write about Nigeria because I now live in Canada? What kind of warped thinking is that? I don’t want to waste precious time indulging in such frivolous conversations, very useless and impotent. Moreover, there are more productive conversations we should be having, such as, how do we get corporate bodies to invest more in literature? How do we get the government to grant annual funding to local publishers and libraries? How do we source for private endowments for literary prizes? I can’t abide censors, who work themselves up trying to decide which Nigerians should write about Nigeria. Let a million stories be told. Let people write from wherever they happen to be. The world is more prosperous for the flowering of stories!
*I feel great about winning the prize for literary criticism in 2021. It’s nice to have a panel of distinguished jury recognise my writing for its merit. That’s a great feeling, which I don’t intend to take for granted. However, I’m still waiting for the new opportunities the prize supposedly confers on its winner. I suppose the Nigeria Prizes for Literature and Literary Criticism still have a bit of work to do in that respect. For instance, they could create more opportunities for Nigerians to engage the winners of these prizes in discussions, not just organise a book reading party in Lagos. What do they lose if they organised reading tours in some major cities in Nigeria, so people could get a chance to further appreciate literary culture? I hope the Advisory Committee finds a way to broaden its vision of the prizes.</text>
      <sha1>j21kr1mwlkvx13z893y5o0jtqcimr2q</sha1>
    </revision>
    <revision>
      <id>3965262</id>
      <parentid>3965258</parentid>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:52:41Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Nnamadee</username>
        <id>3248887</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>#VOICE4AFRICA</comment>
      <origin>3965262</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="8164" sha1="fw7urtl6npz65y0f3v4h6xkm0zq8zzm" xml:space="preserve">'''Uchechukwu Peter Umezurike''', also known as Uche Peter Umez, is a Nigerian author and academic currently working as an assistant professor of English at the University of Calgary. In addition to publishing several works of children’s fiction, short fiction, and poetry, his academic research draws from gender studies and critical race theory to analyze African, African diaspora, postcolonial, and global literatures as well as film.
==Quotes==
*Thanks, Nzube, I appreciate all the work you do for African literature. It’s inspiring to see a younger generation of Africans building and fostering platforms to promote African literary and cultural productions. Look at what you are doing, the same thing Ukamaka Olisakwe (Isele), Obi-Young Otosirieze (Open Country), Umar Abubakar Sidi and Richard Ali (Konya Shamsrumi), and Kenechi Uzor (Iskanchi) are doing for African writing, and many others. I feel heartened by the reception I’ve received from people who have read Double Wahala, Double Trouble. I’m glad that Bibi Ukonu and his team at Griots Lounge Publishing, Canada agreed to publish it. Double Wahala, Double Trouble is a montage of people’s experiences, stories, and lives, which I happened to crystallise as fiction, something more relatable for me, and I hope, for my readers. I wanted to explore the frequency of trouble in our world, how trouble haunts our being and relationships, the everydayness of trouble as it besets desire, love, intimacy, family, community, and even the nation. Trouble is very much at home with us, it seems. Yet beyond this exploration of trouble, I wanted to understand how people manage to deal with tragedy while attempting to make sense of their world.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]
*There were times the writing was fun; other times, it was a struggle, mainly because I had to juggle my academic research, noncreative writing, and other quotidian commitments. But then, you already know, no form of writing comes easy to the writer. You must do the backbreaking work while making sure to take care of yourself. Life happens; it doesn’t slow down just because you are recrafting a scene or revising a draft. In hindsight, I’m glad that I put the collection together. Double Wahala, Double Trouble is out there. What a relief!
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]
*Many of the stories had lurked in my mind for more years than I can recollect. It must have taken me more than a decade from writing the first story to the last one, which I wrote, I think, sometime in 2017. I finished working on the manuscript in 2018, during the second year of my PhD program, then left the manuscript until sometime in 2019, when I felt I should revise it and send it to an editor. I didn’t look at the manuscript again until 2020 after I’d received significant feedback from my first editor, the amazing Kimmy Beach. When I felt right about the manuscript, I sent it to a few Nigerian publishers. However, while I was waiting for their response, Griots Lounge Publishing, Canada indicated an interest in the manuscript, and then we worked with two wonderful editors, Kara Toews and Tayo ‘Keyede, to get it ready for publication. So, the rest is history.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]
*I would say “Neighbours” because it seems, to me, the funniest story in the collection, aside from “Stupid.” “Neighbours” tells the story of a quirky artist and his enchantment with his neighbour’s handsome face. But it is also a story about male violence, deception, and trauma. That also happens to be my wife’s favourite story. I enjoyed writing it.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]
*Yes, I remember that interview I had with Sokari Ekine, the founder of Black Looks. I was trying to understand the dimensions of history then, which I’m still doing right now. History not only as time past, an event or a series of events that happened in the past, but also time in the present—the haunting that a past event leaves in the present moment. I’m struck by the pivots of before and now, the dynamic between both. We live in history and cannot escape it. History is perhaps a door with multiple doors. It is never shut but remains open. Who can slam shut the door of history? Moreover, history is here even though it happened then. The present is a history unfolding, interleaving into the past while clearing its own history for the future. For the future citizens, their present is our time past, our present as historical. There is a continuum. A story refuses the fixity of the past. Every story that has been told is of the past, present, and future, so what stories we tell, the stories we share among ourselves, are shaped by our relationship to history and how we perceive the past and anticipate the future, be it in relation or opposition to the present. That is the connection I’ve been trying to figure out; this connection is evident in how I crafted some of my stories in Double Wahala, Double Trouble. The past of colonialism, figured now as neocolonialism, in the politics of Nigeria and the plunder of the oil-rich Niger Delta. The past of Biafra, restless, chafing the core of national harmony. Is the past of Nigeria any more radically different from the present Nigeria, especially if we consider the frequency of deaths and depredations fellow Nigerians live with? So, like you, I am interested in how history contours and informs the present society.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]
*Please let’s get something clear here: I don’t think I have been out of Nigeria for a considerably long time. And even if I have, what does it matter and how does it impact my art? Who decides who a Nigerian or African is? What does it mean to be a “real” Nigerian or African writer? Such nativist sentiments. I have lived in at least 20 states in Nigeria, so why should anyone dare to question my Nigerianness or tell me not to write about Nigeria because I now live in Canada? What kind of warped thinking is that? I don’t want to waste precious time indulging in such frivolous conversations, very useless and impotent. Moreover, there are more productive conversations we should be having, such as, how do we get corporate bodies to invest more in literature? How do we get the government to grant annual funding to local publishers and libraries? How do we source for private endowments for literary prizes? I can’t abide censors, who work themselves up trying to decide which Nigerians should write about Nigeria. Let a million stories be told. Let people write from wherever they happen to be. The world is more prosperous for the flowering of stories!
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]
*I feel great about winning the prize for literary criticism in 2021. It’s nice to have a panel of distinguished jury recognise my writing for its merit. That’s a great feeling, which I don’t intend to take for granted. However, I’m still waiting for the new opportunities the prize supposedly confers on its winner. I suppose the Nigeria Prizes for Literature and Literary Criticism still have a bit of work to do in that respect. For instance, they could create more opportunities for Nigerians to engage the winners of these prizes in discussions, not just organise a book reading party in Lagos. What do they lose if they organised reading tours in some major cities in Nigeria, so people could get a chance to further appreciate literary culture? I hope the Advisory Committee finds a way to broaden its vision of the prizes.
**[https://theshallowtalesreview.com.ng/fictionalising-history-and-home-a-conversation-with-uchechukwu-peter-umezurike/]</text>
      <sha1>fw7urtl6npz65y0f3v4h6xkm0zq8zzm</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Category:Coming-of-age comedy films</title>
    <ns>14</ns>
    <id>309957</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965255</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T10:48:28Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>~2026-39898-32</username>
        <id>3350218</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;[[Category:Coming-of-age films|Comedy]] [[Category:Teen comedy films]]&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965255</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="70" sha1="s567i37686m6pspfok6lf3nrpui87si" xml:space="preserve">[[Category:Coming-of-age films|Comedy]]
[[Category:Teen comedy films]]</text>
      <sha1>s567i37686m6pspfok6lf3nrpui87si</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>The Durham Proverbs</title>
    <ns>0</ns>
    <id>309958</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965274</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:44:54Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ficaia</username>
        <id>3085955</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>copy from [[w:The Durham Proverbs]]</comment>
      <origin>3965274</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="5528" sha1="0cphnd7mibb7exegt62xzrfm9walna3" xml:space="preserve">{{italic title}}
The '''''[[w:The Durham Proverbs|Durham Proverbs]]''''' is a collection of 46 medieval proverbs from various sources. They were written down as a collection, in the eleventh century, on some pages (pages 43 verso to 45 verso, between a hymnal and a collection of canticles) of a manuscript that were originally left blank. The manuscript is currently in the collection of Durham Cathedral, to which it was donated in the eighteenth century. The ''Proverbs'' form the first part of the manuscript. The second part, to which it is bound, is a copy of Ælfric's ''Grammar'' (minus its glossary). Each proverb is written in both Latin and Old English, with the former preceding the latter.

== Quotes ==

* ''Portio beatitudinis.'' 
* ''Geþyld byð middes ēa[des].''
** Patience is a part of happiness.
** 1 (tr. Shippey 1994)


* ''Amicus tam prope quam longe bonus est.''
* ''Frēond dēah feor ge nēah: byð near nyttra.''
** A friend is good, far or near; a nearer one is more useful.
** 2 (tr. Shippey 1994)


* ''Amicos plures nemo habet.''	
* ''Nafað ǣnigmann frēonda tō feala.''
** No man has too many friends.
** 4 (tr. Shippey 1994)


* ''Postule[t] coram amico qui penuriam suam predicat.'' 
* ''Beforan his frēonde biddeþ, sē þe his wǣdel mǣneþ.''
** He who laments his poverty is a beggar before his friend
** 5 (tr. Shippey 1994)


* ''Bonus annus quando canis corvo exibet.'' 
* ''Gōd gēr byþ þonne se hund þām hrefne gyfeð.''
** It is a good year when the hound gives to the raven.
** 6 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 296)


* ''Sepe in [u]ile sacculo fulget aurum.'' 
* ''Oft on sōtigum bylige searowa licgað.''
** Treasures often lie in a sooty bag.
** 7 (tr. Shippey 1994)


* ''Post medum maxime sitit.'' 
* ''Hwīlum æfter medo menn mǣst geþyrsteð.''
** At times a man thirsts the most after the mead(-drinking).
** 8 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 296)


* ''Post amabilem hominen durissime ted[e]t.'' 
* ''Æfter leofan menn langað swīðost.''
** One longs greatly for the beloved man.
** 9 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 296)


* ''Nunc in iudicio porci dixit maritus sedens in apro.'' 
* ''Nū hit ys on swīnes dōme, cwæð se ceorl sæt on eoferes hricge.''
** &quot;Now it is at the discretion of the pig,&quot; said the churl who sat astride the boar's back.
** 10 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 296)


* ''[N]eque confiderem liceat bene ambulasset dixit qu[i] uidit [s]trigas capite pregredientes.'' 
* ''Ne swā þēah trēowde þēah þū teala ēode, cwæþ sē þe geseah hægtessan æfter hēafde geo[ngan.]''
** &quot;Nonetheless, I would not trust you though you walked well,&quot; said he who saw a witch passing along on her head.
** 11 (tr. Fulk, Cain &amp; Anderson 2003, p. 167) 


* ''[P]rudent[i] facile caus[a] insinuatur.''
* ''Eaðe [wīs] man mæg witan spell and ēac secgan.''
** A wise man can easily master an argument [or question], and also pronounce upon it.
** 16 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 297)


* ''Cecus doubus oculis qui pectore non cernit.''
* ''Blind byþ bām ēagum, sē þe brēostum ne starat.''
** He is blind of both eyes who does not discern his own breast.
** 17 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 297)


* ''[S]ol[i] illi non contendunt qui in unum non conueniunt.''
* ''Ðā ne sacað þe ætsamne ne bēoð.''
** Those do not quarrel who are not together.
** 18 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 297)


* ''[Non omnia] uera dicend[a] sunt.''
* ''Ne dēah eall sōþ āsǣd ne eall sār ætwiten.''
** It does no good (for) all truth (to be) told nor all wrong imputed.
** 20 (tr. Robinson 1982, pp. 4, 262) &lt;!-- For subsequent variations on this same proverb, from Chaucer to Horman's ''Vulgaria'', see Whiting &amp; Whiting 1968, pp. 533 --&gt;


* ''Bene loquere sic bene facias.''
* ''Gyf þū well sprece, wyrc æfter swā.''
** Practice what you preach.
** 20 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 297)


* ''Veritas seips[a]m semper declarat.''
* ''Soþ hit sylf acþeð.''
** Truth reveals itself. &lt;!-- Unsourced translation: &quot;The truth announces itself.&quot; --&gt;
** 21 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 297)


* ''[S]olu[m] igna[u]us [metuere pot]est.''
* ''Earh mæg þæt an þæt he him ondræde.''
** A coward knows one thing: how to be afraid. &lt;!-- Unsourced translation: &quot;A coward can do only one thing: fear.&quot; --&gt;
** 22 (tr. Arngart 1981, p. 297)


* ''Ne[c] cito pauidus nec ilico arri[d]ens qui esse debet.''
* ''Nē sceal man tō ǣr forht nē tō ǣr fægen.''
** One should be neither too soon fearful nor too soon glad.
** 23 (tr. Fulk, Cain &amp; Anderson 2003, p. 167)


* ''Melius centum adire loc[os] quam centum perpati contumelias.''
* ''Selre byþ þæt mon hund heona gesece þonne man hund hynþa geþolie.''
** It is better for a man to seek a hundred places than to endure a hundred shames.
** 25 (tr. Shippey 1994)

== Bibliography ==

* Olof Sigfrid Arngart, [https://www.jstor.org/stable/2846936 &quot;The Durham Proverbs&quot;], ''Speculum'', vol. 56, no. 2 (April 1981), pp. 288–300

* Robert Dennis Fulk; Christopher M. Cain; Rachel S. Anderson, &quot;Wisdom Literature and Lyric Poetry&quot;, [https://archive.org/details/historyofoldengl0000fulk ''A History of Old English Literature''], Blackwell Histories of Literature (2003), p. 167 &lt;!-- ISBN 978-0-631-22397-9 --&gt;

* [[Tom Shippey]], [https://www.academia.edu/8151775/Miscomprehension_and_Re_Interpretation_in_Old_and_Early_Middle_English_Proverb_Collections &quot;Miscomprehension and Re-Interpretation in Old and Early Middle English Proverb Collections&quot;], ''ScriptOralia'', vol. 58 (1994), pp. 293-311

== External links ==
* {{Wikipedia-inline}}

[[Category:Proverbs]]</text>
      <sha1>0cphnd7mibb7exegt62xzrfm9walna3</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
  <page>
    <title>Talk:The Durham Proverbs</title>
    <ns>1</ns>
    <id>309959</id>
    <revision>
      <id>3965275</id>
      <timestamp>2026-07-15T11:45:13Z</timestamp>
      <contributor>
        <username>Ficaia</username>
        <id>3085955</id>
      </contributor>
      <comment>Created page with &quot;== Unsourced ==  * ''Amicus in necessitate probandus est.'' * ''Æt þearfe mann sceal freonda cunnian.'' ** In (times of) need, one must test friends.{{citation needed}} ** 3  * ''Omne in ore quod in mente.''  * ''Eall on mūðe þæt on mōde.'' ** ? ** 12  * ''Commune peccunia propinquorum.'' * ''Gemǣne sceal māga feoh.'' ** ? ** 13  * ''Homo facit sicut fit quando potest sicut uult.''  * ''Man dēþ swā hē byþ þonne hē mōt swā hē wile.'' ** ? ** 14  * ''[N]...&quot;</comment>
      <origin>3965275</origin>
      <model>wikitext</model>
      <format>text/x-wiki</format>
      <text bytes="1124" sha1="1782vkzjiy9duxxvi0tjxheudzybwr8" xml:space="preserve">== Unsourced ==

* ''Amicus in necessitate probandus est.''
* ''Æt þearfe mann sceal freonda cunnian.''
** In (times of) need, one must test friends.{{citation needed}}
** 3

* ''Omne in ore quod in mente.'' 
* ''Eall on mūðe þæt on mōde.''
** ?
** 12

* ''Commune peccunia propinquorum.''
* ''Gemǣne sceal māga feoh.''
** ?
** 13

* ''Homo facit sicut fit quando potest sicut uult.'' 
* ''Man dēþ swā hē byþ þonne hē mōt swā hē wile.''
** ?
** 14

* ''[N]ec caro carnem emendat dixit qui caccabum plenum ponderosum coxit.''
* ''Ne saga sagan, cwæð sē gesēah hwer fulne hēalena sēoþan.''
** Translation unclear. &quot;So far, we must accept defeat on this one.&quot; (Marsden 2004) 
** 15

* ''Reus propiti[ati]one indiget.''
* ''Forworht mann friþes behofað.''
** ?
** 24

* ''Ne wat swētes ðanc, se þe biteres ne onbyrgeð.''
** ᚾᛖ ᚹᚪᛏ ᛋᚹᛖᛏᛖᛋ ᚦᚪᚾᚳ ᛋᛖ ᚦᛖ ᛒᛁᛏᛖᚱᛖᛋ ᚾᛖ ᚩᚾᛒᛁᚱᚷᛖᚦ
** He never knows the pleasure of sweetness, who never tastes bitterness.
** ? [[User:Ficaia|Ficaia]] ([[User talk:Ficaia|talk]]) 11:45, 15 July 2026 (UTC)</text>
      <sha1>1782vkzjiy9duxxvi0tjxheudzybwr8</sha1>
    </revision>
  </page>
</mediawiki>